#life so far has just been bad but with fandoms worth living for Im just like. huh whats outside of that?? there is something!!!

[dorkfruit]

i put this together using my computer's trackpad so the new year is already starting out . bad .

posts: J | F | M | A | M | J | J | A | S | O | N | D

template

reflections on the year, my plans for the future, some studies i did, and wips for the next year all down below for those who are interested

tldr; we will be ianthing next year so watch out!!

oh dear lord it's been another year. 2024! can you believe it! i don't talk much on this blog because i have a tendency to talk too much, but it's my little new year's treat, so here we go.

RECAP

i started taking drawing "seriously" in December of 2020, starting to do studies and stuff, and each year since i've ramped it up more and more. this year, i did. a lot of studies. there's probably like at least 200 more in my folder now (not including the 300 days worth of gesture drawings i did), with things like painting, faces, feet, poses, etc. anything i was struggling with, i went right into studying it. my art has been mediocre for a pretty long time now, and it's only the past few months where i feel i'm starting to get the hang of it, which is exciting!

more importantly, i started posting a lot more on this blog. i really like documenting my progress, looking on where i was before and seeing how i've improved. everytime i draw some fanart, im like, oooghh i can't wait to show my (: followers (: !! lots of locked tomb art of course. i've been trying to nail the energy of the different characters, which is why i enjoy books so much, because you get a lot of creative control. drawing ianthe is my fav of course, cause she's my lil nasty, but also i enjoyed doing designs for characters i hadnt thought about before, like judith.

in addition to the locked tomb, we had some new fandoms that got brief moments in between iantheposting: Fear and Hunger, Postal, Faith The Unholy Trinity, and a couple of old ones too, like We Have Always Lived In The Castle and The Merciless.

i posted about 115 times this year, although most of those are shitposts LOL i love posting stuff on my blog and showing people my stuff <3

THE FUTURE

my plans? do more ianthe art, of course. ill be working on more studies, probably going to work on developing a style, and figuring out how to paint. i'd like to do more actually finished pieces, but let's be honest, it'll still be mostly shitpost doodles. i'd like to do more weird stuff. i've been messing around with some gore and NSFW near the end of the year, and it's fun to draw for me. i like idk art that evokes some type of emotion, especially discomfort, and so i find that type of art fun to do, so if you don't enjoy what i've done thus far in that direction, perhaps this isn't the blog for you. i really like horror media, and so i want to do some stuff like that too.

for specifics, i like western type art, a comic book-esque style i'd like to aim for. but i'd like it to be a little more. weird with it. i find comic books often draw all the characters the same, and make all the characters traditionally attractive, and that's boring to me so i'll have to work on finding a way to keep things weird, while also appealing in a graphic sense. the worst thing my art could be is bland and forgettable.

locked tomb wise... more tridentarii art. need to be really weird with it. i have lots of wips planned, like i have a whole page worth of just thumbnails, so i wanna get some of those done. also i had a few animatics i wanted to do. mostly stupid shit, once i learn how to do animatics, then we'll do actual serious ones. id also like to do more comics. i have some comics storyboarded out with my girlies, i like telling a story so, need practice on that. id also like to develop a way to consistently draw them, for convenience sakes, so i'm not fighting for my life every single time i draw these characters. oh and i wanna do some outfit stuff. i draw them in like. generic clothes everytime but i'd like to come up with a few actual outfit designs, that i can just reference back to. and, of course, more shitposts. lots of stupid shit in 2024 for sure. there was something else i wanted to say here but i can't remember.

ART

oki enough rambling, here's some IMAGES for yall to look at i know everyone loves to look at images.

began this year by warming up with gesture sketches (almost) every day. i started with 20 poses (30 seconds each), and then in november i was like. ugh my hands suck i need to get better at hands, so i switched to doing 10 hand sketches (60 seconds each). i want my art to be very energetic so it's important that i do these !!

anatomy studies of extremities because i'm flopping at those -_- ive gotten better with hands but they're still a struggle. i hate feet tho still

need to get my painting game up. i joined an art forum to get advice, and the biggest suggestion i got was working on my values, so i did various value studies. also lots of faces because my faces flop !!

random doodles to work on drawing from imagination. on my "sketchbook" pages, as i like to call them, i'm usually pretty loose and messy, since the point is just to be drawing so often these will suck, but that's fine. i don't think very much when i draw faces on here either so they end up being in my Instinctive Style i suppose you could say

ianthe wip. i was planning to do a few drawings based on the idea of her having Missing Arm nightmares, but the lineart was intimidating to me so i haven't worked on this one more yet /: also there was going to be a toontown gay homosexual toxic yuri comic that i was gonna put here with it but the page is way too long so umm guess that'll have to wait.

...

anyways. thank you for reading if you got to the bottom of this! i appreciate all the support that i've been getting lately (extra big kissies for the same like 5 people who always reblog my posts youre the best). and we will be ianthing soo hard in 2024 so watch out!!

[taonsil]

people keep saying to me ‘after what you’ve been through’ and it’s still sinking in that I have been through things that aren’t ok and it’s not just that I deserved it _(:з」∠)_

[bitter-sweet-coffee]

your tags 🥺 ❤️❤️❤️ honestly it's so hard to find someone who has critical thinking in the entire euphoria fandom. like, just last week- well, the last couple of weeks, actually, people have been calling cassie just the vilest thing, and even though she's done some questionable, if not outright bad, stuff, I don't think it's deserved. all in all, she's still a kid, and she was at THE LOWEST of her life when nate jacobs decided to sink his claws into her and infected her with his poison. i just think she deserves a little bit of a break.

and this week is what really got my blood boiling. like, lexi literally said in the episode she was afraid people (cassie, especially) would take her play the wrong way, while she only had good intentions. people be out there praising her for "ruining lives" while that's very much not what she intended. she said it herself, she's an observer, and she's observed all of these things, and now she's only reporting them back. i think she intended it more as a way for people to reflect on their actions and relationship, how they might look through in other people's - namely, lexi's - eyes.

do correct me if im off the mark tho. i would love to hear what you think ❤️

BESTIE!!! sorry i waited a while to respond, i didn't want euphoria tumblr to interact with me again lmao it should be quiet now though 👀

i think people start to fuck up when watching euphoria when they assume anyone is a good person. lexi knew she was being messy but deserved to vent, cassie is extremely unstable and self destructive but also not innocent, and nate is psychologically damaged and emotionally neglected, so i am begging the show to get him help at this point.

every character is abusive, and every character has been abused. cassie has been awful to people but she also had a secret abortion last season that everyone forgets about like ???

maddy apologists are my biggest issue tbh. she is a victim of a toxic relationship but she enabled a lot of anger out of nate such as lying about being sexually assaulted by an adult. she was a selfish terrible friend (especially to kat in season 1) and has been physically/verbally/emotionally abusive to multiple people, even beating up random students at school. after the incident in season 2 which i won't spell out for spoiler reasons, i am sympathetic and hope she gets the support she needs. but since season 1 there has been a LOT of support for her bad behaviour because alexa demie is gorgeous and tumblr loves a "girlboss moment" to the point i've seen takes like "well it was NATE who made her do all that bad stuff, she was just psychologically manipulated to be a mean person" as if nate could just "break up with his father" and was totally 100% responsible for his behaviour because childhood and lifelong inescapable abuse from a family member means he's too far gone to be saved. like, pick a side— are abuse victims conditioned and shouldn't be blamed for any toxic abusive actions they perform, or are they fully responsible and unfixable monsters? the true answer is neither/both but since the internet has 0 critical thinking skills, the fandom answer is to sort all the faves as innocent and the unlikeable characters as permanently damaged abusers.

like, people hate jules and always shove the "she's a slutty male-affirming cheater" identity on her every fucking second because they love zendaya and rue. there are also people who get mad at rue for being mean, self destructive, and for doing drugs, but that's literally the point of her character??? she's an addict and it's an atrocious battle that is going to harm her and result in irrational toxic decisions?

a lot of people are mad about kat this season but have missed the entire point of her segment earlier on in s2: kat still can't love herself and ethan's love feels superficial and sappy in the face of her own self worth issues. she gave ethan a shallow, blatantly false reason for breaking up with him so that he'd hate her and not say something like "i know you have self worth issues but i love you!" or "we can make this work!" because kat sees herself as undeserving of love and made it so ethan wouldn't forgive her, and therefore treat her like the monster she sees herself as. THAT is why she went back to cam work and embraced/validated the dark/taboo side of her identity she keeps tucked away: perverted appreciation is all she is worth because it's all she can process people valuing her with.

TLDR: everyone in euphoria has been hurt and have hurt other people: some more than others. the fan favouritism and cherry picking is the reason "fandom mentalities" don't work for a show like this!!! i enjoy/love every character and that doesn't mean i excuse their behaviour, but in fandom-terms it's assumed that liking someone like nate means i justify all his actions by refusing to wish death upon him and the other male characters like mckay and elliot.

ultimately, i want everyone to get the help they need even though i don't expect it to go over that way, and i will spend every other second i have actively hating the "hot takes" people have online that are just supporting female abusers and ignoring the fact that real people and three-dimensional characters are morally grey so liking a character doesn't mean they're a good person 🥴✌️

[siswritesyanderes]

This is a series of asks bc, while I do LIKE all the charas of Fantastic Beasts individually, much of the romantic pairings dont sit well with me. By that mean the messy love polygon w Newt & I think I finally figured out why & I'd like another's opinion on it. For starters, Newt's attraction with Tina is too fast for me considering he was friends w Leta, got expelled out of Hogwarts for Leta, carried Leta's photo in his case, & basically loved her for YEARS. But this is all undone by a [1]

jaunt in NY having met a woman, who he admittedly went on a huge adventure w, over the course of maybe a few weeks. He's so taken w her she replaces Leta's photo w her own &, after refusing to go to Paris for Dumbledore, leaves immediately once he finds out she's there. I just find this unbelievable. I can rationalize it from Newt's perspective where Tina is a fresh breeze sweeping into his life on (percieved) unrequited pining, but this is my conjecture based on my understanding of Newt. [2]

The audience shouldnt be left to rationalize endgame couple of the mc on their own. & the whole thing w Leta is so messily handled I dont think they can save it even if they bring her back in FB3. How she feels for Newt vs Theseus & unresolved lingering affection, etc. She & Newt were SO important to each other & we SEE that & they dont HAVE to get together, but they need proper resolution bc they have actual history between them. God Leta in general deserved so much better. [3]

But my main gripe is that this love polygon serves no purpose to what I believe is the main selling point of FB: the world. HP having love stories makes sense bc we're following the story of a boy as he goes through adolescence & his journey through that via school is part of that, which is why the romance feels fitting. It's a very personal story. FB on the otherhand is the best peak we have at the wider wizarding world beyond school. HP introduces the world of magic, but FB rlly expands it [4]

To that end Jakob & Queenie's relationship is the only one I find myself liking, bc it's deeply tied to the world setting, the series' biggest selling point (in my opinion, should have said this earlier). It underscores the attitudes of the period & the conflict they face feels suitably substantial & not like filler. There's a moral question between them of are they worth it? And how far should they go to be together?

Imma be real hear & say FB2 was rlly Queenie's movie & they should have been ballsy & just make Queenie the mc for FB2, bc her story was actually considerably more important to the overall development of the story than Newt's, which mostly came off as a rushed & a tad clichè soap drama. & making it about Queenie I think builds more room for good conflict & independent narrative for Tina that would serve her chara better. [5? 6?]

If I bad to be REAL ballsy, I'd say my big issue w/ the relationships in the FB series & how it enhances or impedes the main story & what I believe to be it's biggest attracter (the setting) could have been solved if they made Newt's romantic interest a muggle. It attaches a deeper meaning & relevance to them & the story so it felt more deeply that they truly moved WITH the narrative rather than beside it but I guess Im just picky. Thx for putting up w this! [Final]

(My response below the cut.)

Yeah, pretty much all of this is right.

Regarding the Tina thing, it was definitely rushed, especially since there was literally nothing romantic between them in the whole first movie, except maybe the end part where they're stumbling over their words. Despite knowing how movies work and knowing that they were the male and female lead, I still found that completely out of left field, because they don't really share any interests and I didn't feel like they felt anything in particular for each other before that. She really wants to be an auror and feels really intensely about it; he just wants to travel the world and write about magical creatures and take care of them. I don't see a lot of compatibility there, and the movie didn't really do anything to reconcile that gap.

Jacob and Queenie made sense, because they actually sowed some seeds for it. It's not even about the fact that they both like to cook; they showed an interest in each other throughout. They noticeably like each other. Newt and Tina never really had that, to me, so it was bizarre for her to become his primary motivation in the second movie.

Queenie's trajectory in movie 2 overall bothers me, so while I agree it would have been better if they'd centered it more around her, I definitely think they needed to drastically rewrite pretty much everything she did. Enchanting Jacob at the beginning never sat well with me; I usually only have to say this in the Descendants fandom, but if one half of the ship is magical and the other half isn't, we can't have the magical one enchanting the non-magical one for romantic reasons without addressing what a violation of trust that is. Like, Jacob would be justified for never trusting her again, over that. Also, the fact that she apparently holds it against people if they think bad things about her is not something I would expect from someone who has been a Legilimens as long as she has, and not a detail I like, at all. Especially since it was used to give her justification to be mad at Jacob after she enchanted him in the first place. I find it sad, because Queenie was definitely my favorite character in the first movie. (Also, joining Grindelwald was a nonsensical thing to do. I can only assume she's there to spy on him or something, because it makes literally no sense.)

As for Leta, I really don't like how that was approached. First of all, I don't like how their mention of her in the first movie was "She was a taker; you need a giver," because once we actually met the character, that only made me resent Queenie for representing her that way. Leta deserved better in pretty much every way, and they definitely shouldn't have killed her off like that. I find the whole situation really iffy from a racial standpoint. The first black character to be written three-dimensionally in all of HP lore, and they make sure to preemptively tell the audience that she's a "taker", kill her in the same movie we meet her, and manage to trivialize her death by turning it into a little "Who was she saying 'I love you' to?" mystery. I like her relationship with Newt and Theseus, and I'd definitely want to see more of it.

Yes, it definitely would have been better, thematically, if they'd made the love interest a Muggle. (I'd honestly say they should've paired Newt with Jacob, but I know they're unwilling to do that. That would be kind of cool, though, to see the movie shaping up with two male characters and two female characters and have the men end up with each other and the women just live their lives as humans.)

With the story they ended up telling, though, I don't think that is needed; since Queenie is already dealing with the wizard/Muggle storyline, Newt could have a different conflict. Maybe his love interest should be a werewolf or something, to tie in the wizarding world's unresolved dislike for "half-breeds". And if he were in a relationship with someone already regarded as a creature, the wider wizarding world might take a different view to his studies and look down on him a lot more. Idk, a thought.

And then, with Leta/Theseus and Grindelwald/Dumbledore (if they were willing to actually deal with that), they'd pretty much hit every controversial beat they've got: wizard/Muggle, wizard/"half-breed", interracial, homosexual. Credence and Nagini are both creatures, kind of, but I still like them together, so their relationship doesn't have to tie into any theme; it just has to be developed way more.

On the whole, Crimes of Grindelwald felt like they skipped a movie. It feels like they needed a middle installment to make these relationships happen, instead of jumping from "Do Newt and Tina maybe have feelings for each other?" to "Newt loves Tina and Tina is possessive enough of Newt to be outwardly upset with him when she thinks he's engaged to someone else," and creating a whole relationship between Credence and Nagini that we see none of.

The fact that Queenie and Jacob were done well in the first movie gives me a fair amount of goodwill for them, but that goodwill only offers enough cushioning from the botching that movie 2 did that I'm near-indifferent to the ship, now, instead of actively opposed. I'd like to see things improved, but as it currently stands, I'd be just as happy seeing them end up not together as together. The fact that Leta's relationships with Newt and Theseus were more interesting than any of the aforementioned makes it that much more ridiculous that they killed her. What ship am I supposed to care about how? If I can't go into the next movie delusionally hoping Newt and Leta will get some moments, or enjoying the Theseus and Leta content, then I'll just be sitting there waiting for Credence and Nagini to share a screen, and who knows when that'll happen?

[just-a-fangirl13]

Why s5 *might* be the season MacRiley happens

Okay so...Hear me out! I'm not crazy I promise!!

Firstly, after 5x03 (and probably 5x04) it may seem very unlikely that MacRiley could ever happen. But I thought of a few reasons why they might actually happen by the end of s5 after all.... (it gets a lil long winded and kinda complicated but just stick with me till the end!)

1. All the MacRiley moments including the ones in 5x03.

[this Mac smile could not be an accident or something that slipped through both production and post-production right?! that in itself is a whole reason!]

Every Macriley moment we have ever had- whether it's the hugs, Riley saving Mac, Mac saving Riley, the ultimate show of loyalty when Riley went after Mac during Codex or even just the looks exchanged between the two- to any outsider it would seem pretty obvious that they are dating or at least in love. Keep in mind the writers would have written each of those scenes and Lucas and Tristan have acted them out with a specific build up in mind aka MacRiley.(think about the date episode: Riley just got dumped but was still thinking about how Mac might be hungry. She didnt have to do that. She could have just shown up at his place..) I mean how can they write two people so perfectly in sync and so perfect for each other and not have them end up together? It would just be a waste of all that tension and slow burn. (not to mention all the hugs and glances)

2. They know we exist. 

The MacRiley fam is very active on twitter with the writers and while they were writing 5x01 they knew we were around. They know we are a huge group. They would not want to risk pissing 90% of the fandom off by not making MacRiley endgame.

[P.S.yes 5x03 was a bait and switch but if you were paying attention you would have noticed that neither Lucas not Tristan live tweeted or hyped up the episode. They knew we would probably hate it so they didnt publicise it too much! so in the future if you have doubts about the episode being a MacRiley one just check their stories or posts on twitter/intstagram]

3. Yes 5x03 happened. 

I really think it was an episode they HAD to write. Ok so after 4x13 they had 7 more episodes planned and were filming 4x20 (aka the finale) when the pandemic struck. So they have these 6 episodes but no finale for it. [Idk if anyone else has noticed but in 5x01 there were clearly some parts cut out. For example the conversation between Desi and Riley towards the end seemed a bit jilted. Riley asking Desi to forgive her but Desi replied with yeah we are cool (still no apology ofc) I feel like something happened during that which ended up getting cut out so it could fit with the final story.]

This makes me think that they have rewritten a few bits to tie into the new finale episode. In 5x03 when Mac asked Desi to come fishing with him which was clearly something very personal to him she was like no do better.. then we see Mac's disappointed expression. She could have easily said okay but maybe not for our first date? Or its not really my thing? Or just about anything else rather than laughing in his face like that. Eventhough MD is together they still arent compatible. Mac’s final words in 5x03 was him being desperate. I truly think he is so broken and lost that Desi is the only safe thing left, the only thing he feels like he can fix right now. Once he finds himself again and heals...then it's going to hit him like a pile of bricks!!

4. But Riley doesn't have feelings anymore...WELL doesnt she? 

When it comes to Mac, Riley is always in denial. We saw it in s4 when she tells Bozer not to make her say it. I think s5 will show her finally accepting it. Finally accepting that she is in love with her best friend and that it definitely isnt Codex adrenaline because she caught the feels when Codex wasnt even around. While Mac's arc would include realising he and Desi are never going to work and that he is unhappy and that RILEY is the one for him.

[why else would they give Riley feelings for Mac? Something has to come of it.]

5. The slow burn rule.[this point is a lil complicated] 

Now season 5 is rumoured to have 13 episodes. So here’s what I think: If MacGyver follows the pattern that most shows do when it comes to slow burns, then technically MacRIley should have happened at the end of season 4. But since the season got cut short and they didnt get to air/finish their final episode the writers had to improvise. 

From what I know, 4x19 which is 5x04 for us is the episode where Mac meets Desi’s parents and 4x20 was supposed to be the finale that was left unfinished.(they are definitely moving the timeline ahead if a pre finale episode is suddenly a mid season one.) There might have been a 4x21 or 4x22 but I haven't heard anything about those....EVER.

So what I think they have decided to do instead is extend the MD storyline a bit longer just so they dont end up scrapping all their s4 episodes where they would be together and write a new finale that ties everything together, aka MacRiley.

If you think about episode counts, s4 and s5 together would have 26 episodes which is a how long a normal season runs. Basically what im trying to say is if we follow the ‘slow burns end by s4’ and take season 5 as an extension of 4 then MacRiley should get together in the season 5 finale or maybe the episode just before. (IM REALLY TRYING TO GET SOME LOGIC INTO THIS)

This would be a typical TV thing too where the couple finds out about each other’s feelings while the main arc of the show is also at its peak, which perfectly sets up a future season where fans are hyped but still has a satisfying ending.

6. So what about MacDesi?

So far the macgyver writers have given us characters we love. Think of every character on the show apart from maybe Desi... Mac, Riley, Bozer, Jack, Matty, Leanna, Samantha, Russ and even Murdoc. WE LOVE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM. So then why is Desi such a strange character? I think shes purposely been written as an opposite to Mac or even Riley (I get she’s supposed to kinda replace Jack but Jack is really irreplaceable). 

It's not necessarily a bad thing its just not a great thing to do or have great execution. People have said things like Desi is a badass and shouldnt have to apologise or say I love you back to her boyfriend because she is a strong woman...I'm sorry but your opinion of who a strong woman is, is EXTREMELY skewed. A strong woman is someone who can make mistakes and when she does, she is ‘strong’ enough to own up to it, she is loyal and fierce and also caring while being a badass who can take down bad guys. And for GODS SAKE, RILEY DAVIS IS A STRONG WOMAN...people have called her mushy and feminine on twitter and I'm just very confused by that.....

Anyways before I go off on a rant, it seems like Desi is intentionally being written this way. Every opportunity they get to redeem her and make her more relatable or just a better person they just dont take it. While Rileys character arc is one of the best I've ever seen. Either its intentional or they’ve forgotten how to write characters...which is worrisome but ill give them the benefit of the doubt.

The writers also know we dont like Desi. The amount of times we've tagged them in the toxic posts or pointed out problematic things we can be sure they've seen at least half of those. So theres no way they dont know. RIGHT?

So why then is MD still a thing you may ask??

Well for one they cant break them up again off screen because of those unreleased s4 episodes. (not to mention the other parts of the audience who arent as invested in mac’s love life would probably be very confused.)

Secondly Mac has to be the one to pull the plug, not Desi. 4x13 made it seem like Desi was the annoyed one not Mac. He apologised to her which meant he wanted to fix things. 

Thirdly, they are opening the chpt one last time before they permanently close it. MD is going to be a stark contrast to macriley(it already is in every way possible). Every issue Mac and Desi had can be used to show how amazing macriley really is as two people who arent even dating yet.

Fourthly, MD being together is a sort of commentary on Macs mental health as well. We can see how happy he is with Riley but around Desi he becomes some one else. If the writers are doing this on purpose or subconsciously still remains to be seen.

And Yes keeping MD around for a few more episodes seems like a necessary risk right now but I have a feeling its going to be worth it later.

[I know we have had like 4 desi entered episodes already but I really think 5x04 will be the last of it since 5x05 is the Jack episode and 5x06 is Mac+Riley+Bozer episode with no mention of Desi at all!]

The writers know we are a dedicated bunch and they know that once MD breaks up for the last time the entire fandom will be waiting and watching. That's when the show will be at its peak. That will be the perfect moment to bring in MacRiley’s arc to a new start!

Congrats if you stuck with me through this whole thing! if you agree/disgaree with any of these or have other reasons why they could be endgame in s5 let me know!!

[dessarious]

Misconceptions, Miscommunication, and Misinformation Pt94

AO3   Beginning   Previous   Next

Marinette could honestly say she hadn’t been this relaxed since before she became Ladybug. She was leaning against Chloe as they sat on the couch while Selina asked them and Luka questions about themselves. At least when she and Damian weren’t trading barbs. It was so… normal in a way. She didn’t have to worry about saying the wrong thing and outing herself. She wasn’t waiting for the next Akuma attack or worrying about keeping everyone around her calm so they weren’t the next victim. She wasn’t hiding anything from the people in this room and that made all the difference.

“Oh I assure you there is nothing more entertaining than watching Tim try and explain a cold case to the toaster at three in the morning.” Selina’s eyes were shining with repressed laughter but Damian rolled his eyes.

“If by entertaining you mean pathetic. But if that’s your gauge for entertaining I vote the time Todd shot himself because he was doing target practice and forgot to switch out his rubber bullets with live ammo.”

“I think I missed that one.”

“I still have the tape if you want to watch. Watching him fire off five rounds and then scream like a little girl as they come back at him is well worth the time.” Selina was still laughing when there was a knock at the door.

“It’s probably Daddy coming to lecture me about something.” Chloe sounded resigned and Marinette’s temper flared.

“I’ll handle it. He won’t risk pissing off Bruce Wayne’s fiance.” Selina jerked the door open before blinking in surprise at the person on the other side. “Can I help you?”

“I’m here to talk to Chloe.” Marinette looked at Chloe in confusion and saw a matching, slightly more pissed off, expression as she recognized Adrien’s voice. As far as she knew they hadn’t talked since Chloe transferred. When Selina looked back and raised an eyebrow Chloe hesitated before nodding. Marinette could feel the tension radiating off of her. Adrien stepped past the woman and stopped immediately. It was obvious he hadn’t expected so many people.

“What do you want Agreste?” The open hostility in her tone caused Marinette to wince. Even if it was his own actions that ultimately led to the rift she still felt bad that she was the focal point that made them both lose their oldest friend.

“Can we talk in private?” He wouldn’t look anyone in the eye and his tone was off. Chloe must have heard it too.

“Anything you have to say to me can be said in front of everyone here.” He looked like he was going to argue, but ended up letting out an irritated sigh.

“Fine. I need your help to get in contact with Ladybug.” Marinette tensed and she felt Chloe’s arms tighten around her.

“Absolutely not.” Adrien actually glared at her.

“Why do you want to contact Ladybug?” He transferred his glare to her and Marinette could feel a growl starting in Chloe’s chest. She pinched the other girl’s arm as a warning. She had no idea who Chat Noir had been and Marinette didn’t want to risk Adrien recognizing Plagg’s influence.

“It’s personal.” Marinette actually shuddered. She honestly didn’t think she could deal with him coming on to her without physically assaulting him at this point.

“If you won’t say what you want I’m not going to bother Ladybug about it. She’s got more than enough to deal with without your nonsense.” Chloe’s imperious tone was a front and Marinette studied Adrien as he pouted at the floor. It wasn’t what she expected though she couldn’t say exactly why.

“Look, I get that you all hate me because my father turned out to be Hawkmoth.”

“No one here hates you because of that Adrien.” She tried to make her voice gentle but she could hear the strain in it.

“No, we hate you because you are a self serving asshole with no real concept of empathy.” Everyone in the room frowned at Damian. He wasn’t wrong, it was just a bit hypocritical for him of all people to be pointing that out.

“I need to talk to Ladybug to see if she can help my mother. For some reason when Nathalie told her about my father she forgot to mention that my mother was never actually missing. She’s in a secret room, in a coma because of the Peafowl Miraculous. She only told me after she was certain Father wasn’t going to get out on bail.” He mumbled the words to the floor and just about everyone inhaled sharply at the information. Yeah, all she’d told them was that Gabriel was trying to get his wife back.

“So what, you think Ladybug will let you make the wish your father wanted?” Chloe sounded more confused than hostile at least.

“No. I’m well aware she won’t risk that. She might be able to help her though since it was a Miraculous that caused the damage. That or she might know someone who can. Either way I have to try.” He sounded so… lost. For all he’d made her life miserable, on both sides of the mask, she couldn’t help but feel sorry for him. He’d lost everything.

“We’ll make sure your message gets to her.” Marinette felt Chloe tense behind her again and started rubbing soothing circles into her forearm. This was something she needed to do, and not for Adrien. The truth was that Mme. Agreste didn’t deserve to continue to suffer because of the things her husband or son did.

“Thank you. And Damian could you have your father contact me when it’s convenient?” Damian just scowled at him.

“Why?”

“My mother was never declared legally dead and she has her own shares in Gabriel. Given everything, if she wakes she’ll likely want to sell them. If she doesn’t they’ll go to me and I certainly don’t want anything to do with the company.”

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[normal-thoughts-official]

Ok so Camille’s an asshole on that we can all agree, but I’m really tired of people in the fandom acting like she’s just your typical annoying ex and she makes poor uwu Alec feel insecure cause fuck that. Camille was 100% abusive and manipulative but I also think she was sexually abusive too I mean seeing what she did to Simon and kissing Magnus without his consent even though he was clearly uncomfortable, consent doesn’t really seem to be an issue for her-

I feel like she definitely manipulated his fear of loneliness and not being good enough, to suit her needs. Like Magnus isn’t in the mood for sex or it’s especially triggering on a certain day, either way he’s not up for it but Camille makes him do it anyway. She threatens to leave or go find someone else who can fulfill her needs or take care of her when Magnus won’t, ‘I mean does he even love her when he won’t do this one simple thing for her?’ 

So he just lets her do what she wants, even if he’s having a full blown panic attack Camille doesn’t care or she’ll just leave insulting him saying she can’t deal with this right now and leaving Magnus with no idea when or if she’ll be back. So the next time she asks he hesitates less or initiates it more even when he’s not in the mood so she won’t leave and yeah I have a lot of emotions relating to this. and now I’m thinking about how it’ll affect his future relationships, not even talking about Alec but other people - I have this headcanon where when he got away from Camille and is healing, him ragnor and Catarina live together in ragnors cottage or somewhere away from people for awhile so Magnus can slowly heal and focus on himself and unlearn Camille’s abuse with the help of his family 

But despite what this fandom says Magnus has always been a helper and a selfless person to the point of self destruction. He’s unable to prioritise his own health and he wouldn’t be able to slow down and feel the full force of the abuse he experienced cause he feels like he’ll fall apart if he does and ‘no one wants a pathetic crybaby who breaks down when someone moves their hand too fast in his direction it wasn’t even that bad he’s just exaggerating like he always does this is why Camille doesn’t love him back’ (the ‘’ parts were meant to be strikethrough to signify Magnus’ inner thoughts but that doesn’t work on asks)

And he’s scared to get in another relationship cause he doesn’t think he’d be able to speak up for himself if they turned violent or controlling, he’s scared that if they did he’d just let them so he closes himself off from people puts these walls around him and a bright smile on his face that doesn’t let anyone think there’s anything wrong. And theres so much pain going on in the world ‘they have it much worse than him anyway’ and Magnus tries to help the best he can as he always does and he’s always there for people to lean on without any reciprocation and he’s so emotionally and physically tired and he’s not sure how much longer he can take it, almost considers going back to blackfairs bridge ‘really he’d be doing the world a favour’ but theres too many bad memories and he promised his family he would try so he holds on and then he finds Raphael and that obviously doesn’t fix everything but- I was going to continue this but it’s two am in my country and honesty it’s too long already😅 sorry for the rant it’s just a lot of emotions. Im so tired of the ‘Camille’s an annoying ex who keeps getting in the way of my favourite gay ship😠’ metas and needed to let out some feelings before I explode from my hate for Camille

UGH ANON HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE NOT ONLY A GENIUS BUT ALSO MY NEW BEST FRIEND, AN INTELLECTUAL, AND COMPLETELY RIGHT. YOU ARE SO CORRECT!!! idk if uve read my other post that i posted while i was waiting for you but we no longer have the same hat we are SHARING the hat!! i can't believe i got this ask right after i had just made that long ass rant and was in so much need to talk about this like ugh are you my guardian angel. i love you more than anyone else ive ever met

ok ok ok coherent thoughts ok i can do this. first of all THE SALT how does it feel to have vision and coherency. ppl writing camille as just an annoying ex or a bad ex or even as like "oh they both made mistakes and it ended up terrible" drives me UP THE WALL. camille was explicitly abusive, so much so that magnus CANONICALLY WAS UNABLE TO ALLOW PEOPLE TO GET CLOSE TO HIM FOR ALMOST A CENTURY. and she was shown to be abusive, both in the physical sense as you have reminded us so brilliantly and in the sense that her whole "choose me" speech? like she doesn't have to literally say the words "no one but me would ever love you" for that to be exactly what she's saying. she's obviously playing with his insecurities and putting him down while presenting her as his savior, it's CLASSIC ABUSE. she was written as such a perfect to-the-book abuser that it honestly shocks me like they did that really all they ticked all the boxes. the way she immediately launched to talk about alec's mortality too, the way she was obviously trying to make them fight and draw them apart - it wasn't a jealousy thing, it is just that she's abusive and she wants him isolated so she can toy with him and manipulate him 

EVEN SALTIER WHEN THEY MAKE IT ABOUT ALEC BEING INSECURE LIKE. especially because canonically he literally watched camille kiss magnus and didn't care, which was sexy of him because i was dreading some jealousy drama or something but instead he was just like. obviously she did it to hurt you. i only care in the sense that she's a fucking bitch. we stan! 

as for how she treated him! oof i think the same thing with the same words dioajdsaoij it always circled back to "why can't you do this for me?" in and outside of sex - i mentioned that in a conversation in the comments of my other post but i think that with camille the sexual abuse was really just an extension of the regular abuse, so they bleed together and are not really separable in that sense. at every turn, he had to prove his worth, and she used his fear of loneliness both in the sense that she amplified it and made it seem like the only way to not be lonely was to be with her, and that she gave him just enough for him not to feel desperately lonely so she could string him along. not to mention, they both always go back to how magnus supposedly "owes" her, and yes, it's because of the bridge, of course, but there's also that underlying tone of "because she put up with him and gave him affection when no one else would". even when what she did was nowhere close to real affection. so it's both the bridge and the after. she could have saved him and left, but she stayed. that's why he feels he owes her, and she will absolutely use it

AND UR SO RIGHT ABOUT MAGNUS BEING UNABLE TO PRIORITIZE HIS OWN HEALTH UGH UGH UGH UGH like he has no choice for a while because she left him fucking broken and seeing the way she treats him and the amount of shit he puts up with i can only imagine how far she had to go for him to reach a breaking point and leave her for real. but as soon as he could pretend to have himself together he just threw himself out there. and i believe that he felt guilty for having catarina and ragnor take care of him when he abandoned them because of camille - obviously that's not what happened, she manipulated him into staying away from them, made his life hell whenever he wanted to hang out with them until he no longer had the energy to put up a fight to keep in contact with the people he loves, but it's what he feels that happened, and most likely what camille herself eventually started to tell him happened once they had been pulled away enough. ("you're gonna leave me? and go back to who? your little friends who tried to pit you against me from day one? they're just gonna say 'i told you so', magnus. and why would they take you back when you left them before? when was the last time you even saw them? you chose this, you chose me, and now you're gonna come back to them and expect them to welcome you with open arms? you selfish little prick")

AND RAPHAEL!!! raphael was so important, honestly, we say that magnus didn't let anyone into his heart but obviously raphael was the exception and EXTREMELY important for his healing. it's a complicated relationship because he's sort of a father figure for rapha, and as such, he doesn't allow himself to be completely vulnerable around him, because that's not "his role". but! he was the first person whom magnus let in. and they obviously know each other deeply ("i hate to see you like this" even though magnus looked completely put together to the outside eye) and are plenty affectionate ("sweet boy", the hugs, the way rapha talked about magnus with so much love and awe in his eyes and voice) and trusting (the way raphael went to magnus' loft, not his own damn clan, when he was tortured...). i know this fandom likes to pretend that they pretend to hate each other but NO THEY DON'T they are openly caring and loving with each other fucking fight me on this

anyway, my point is that raphael was the first person he allowed himself to trust, and of course, part of that is simply because raphael was vulnerable and in need and like you said he can't just stay still when he sees someone struggling. but to care for raphael eventually had to mean to open up to him and when he welcomed raphael in, he gained a new member to his family. raphael is his kid. that's no small thing. their bond goes deep and it's extremely important because again, after camille magnus wouldn't allow people to get close to his heart, because he was scared of how they could use that against him. raphael was his first, and the only reason magnus was able to open himself up for romantic love again (which was an extra step, not because romantic love is more important or deeper, but because it's specifically the kind of love that camille used against him, and thus it makes him even more scared) was because he had already been relearning trust and platonic love with rapha

rapha did him good!!! there's a reason he calls him "sweet boy" okay. and rapha cares about him and he NOTICES WHEN HE'S IN A BAD SHAPE EVEN THROUGH ALL OF MAGNUS' WALLS and he specifically didn't want magnus involved with the camille drama even when it had obviously gotten out of hand because he wanted to keep him safe and away from her!!! i want to be shot in the face!!! they love each other so much! fuck!

and also that implies that raphael knows about camille which means he might be the first person who met magnus post-camille and heard the story, which means that he might be (and probably is) the first person who was never involved that magnus opened up about this to. if that ain't some powerful and important shit i don't know what is. because part of abuse is that you can't talk about it - there's this sense of shame and guilt both from staying and from not staying more, especially because magnus canonically still feels like he owes her... aaaaa

this answer is all over the place im sorry but my point is you are correct, camille is a textbook abuser not just a shitty ex, she fucked up his head and made him unable to open up for a long time, and the first person that helped him break those walls was raphael and they LOVE EACH OTHER VERY MUCH AND DEEPLY thank you for your attention

[agl03]

Hello! I’m a new aos watcher, so I apologise if this is a repeated rant, I just wanted to vent a little and found your blog :) I just finished through season 3 and 4 and those were really… rough on fitzsimmons, more so than the first 2, and I think it’s because the writers were so inconsistent? 3A was just a mess to jemma. she was so hot and cold, but not in the way you’d expect from being on a planet. it was like watching a different character almost every other episode [1/6]

[2/6] she has ptsd, then she doesn’t, she’s professing love for fitz, then professing it for will. I was getting whiplash! It felt like the writers put her through hell and then didn’t know how to come back from it, but gathered their bearings in 3B (although if I’m honest, that felt a little cheap, because it was a redo for her relationship with fitz but she still never got to react to being on a freaking alien planet!)

[3/6] and then season 4 was so hard to watch how they tore fitz down. I just find it so hard to believe that, without jemma, fitz would be such a monster, because he had to be a good person too, right? otherwise its like he had 0 personality before jemma and she carved him into who he was, but that doesn’t make sense. I guess I’m still shocked that he never woke up from it, even though everyone else did. it felt like the writers pushed him far (too far) and didn’t know what to do with him.

[4/6] I haven’t seen season 5 so I hope they mention it a little bit, but it was a real struggle to see how extreme they went with him, and Im honestly struggling with whether or not i should go on because the writers seem to love to push them to extremes and then backpedal and not in any way that resolves anything, it really makes me cringe sometimes!

[5/6] I also thought it was strange that fitz got a chance to say, very clearly, that he would always choose jemma over anyone, but that jemma never said anything about that for will? I get that jemma is more reserved than fitz, but I’m still a little sore about that, it doesn’t help with fitz looking like besotted second choice, is all I’m saying. I guess I’ll have to see in the later seasons…

[6/6] anyway, i'm sorry for this, i had about 4 seasons of angst built up in me and i didn't know who to turn to! i really like the show, but i am starting to try and watch with less and less expectations because i keep getting my hopes up for a real resolution and it hasn't happened after almost 100 episodes... thank you for listening and for being so friendly from what i see! i hope i haven't poked old wounds or anything !

Hi Anon!

Welcome to the Fandom, and you have no idea how much these kinds of asks are right up my ally over the years.  I’d say go digging through my blog for more of the metas but that is spoiler central in there so I hope this will suffice until you are done.

First and foremost I don’t want to spoil anything for you but I’ll say to you what I said to the fandom at the end of Season 4....just hang in there we have to trust that the writers have a plan.   I”m REALLY gonna stress this one cause I have a feeling you’ll be back.

Season 3 does indeed hold many old wounds and a pile of story lines that started and then went no where or flat out didn’t make sense.  The whole Space Rando thing was upsetting to say the least but I will tell you the writers said in the Season 3 Declassified that he was nothing more than a roadblock in getting Fitzsimmons together, 12 episodes, but that is what is was.  Were there other ways they could have worked with a more father figure Space Rando and Jemma’s PTSD for that delay, yes, but to be very honest they did not have the real estate to do that kind of story the justice it needed with everything else going on.  It is also worth noting they had to fire the actor that played Will and in that had to change a few things, IE Hive was Ward.   Real estate wise the cast had gotten pretty large at that point and there just wasn’t enough time to properly deal with all that was going on.

Season 4 they did much better, had things mapped out better, but that still didn’t change the fact that I suspect there were a few lane changes story wise .  Again thanks to the declassified books.   And over the years I’ve done A LOT of metas on the Framework and I think something that gets lost a lot is what Radcliffe said he wanted and what AIDA actually did when it came to fixing a regret.

Radcliffe told AIDA, in order to keep the team quiet and not trying to bust out like May did, was to take away a regret.   And for May that was Bahrain.  That change was what set up the hell scape we came into with Hydra in charge.  Radcliffe was blissfully off on his happy Island with no clue what she was really up too until it was too late.  

After 4.14 when AIDA got her hands on the rest of the team she didn’t do like she did with May, Change her biggest regret, rather she changed A regret and for everyone but Fitz stuck them somewhere where they wouldn’t get in her way.  Mack got his daughter back and was ready to die in there with her.  Mace got to be the Hero Inhuman Leader he always wanted to be.  Coulson was a teacher.  May was where her regret left her.  Daisy (had she been replaced) would have just been another foot soldier in Ophelia’s army.  And Jemma was where she could never ever have a chance of getting to Fitz because she feared their love and that Jemma would take him from her.  And I have proof those were not the regrets that they would have had fixed and I’ll circle back to that in a second.

Fitz was her target all along.  She knew from the Darkhold she needed him for what she wanted.  Looking Glass and Love.  However, she didn’t realize that his heart always was Jemma’s and when he wasn’t brainwashed and controlled within an inch of his life that he’d leave her in a second.  She mistook his previous acts of caring and empathy as love and had no understanding of the depths of human emotions. IE you can love people different ways.  Sure he cared about AIDA but he loves Jemma with his heart and soul and vise versa.

As Fitz was her target she fixed things so that she could insert herself in his life in Jemma’s place and that he would have grown up with his awful father who taught him that cruelty and power was the way to go.  This also kept out any positive and caring influences like his Mother, Jemma, and the team.  

I said I had proof that some of those regrets weren’t necessarily what the team would have picked.  That came via Self Control from Robo Coulson and Robo Fitz bearing in mind these LMD’s all had scans of who’d they replaced.  Their memories and their desires.  

Robo Coulson told Robo May to let this whole hostile takeover happen because in the Framework they were happy and together.  That was decidedly not the case there though their connection ended up proving crucial to getting everyone out.  

Robo Fitz told Jemma he was doing this for her so they could get married, grow old together.  Had he known he would be sending Jemma literally into the grave Robo Fitz would not have gone along with the plan.  He thought he was getting Jemma and they were going to go live their own Happily Ever After in there.  Yeah, not the case either.  

With the not waking up, no one but Coulson woke up and that was only thanks to Tahiti.  And yes, it was brutal.  Every week my poor ask box got more and more upset and as a fandom we were more than ready to get the hell out of there.  I mistakingly died on the hill that Jemma would snap him out of it (though I did accurately predict the second Fitznapping....yay).  She didn’t because this isn’t Once Upon a Time, True Love’s kiss doesn’t break the curse of having your mind completely wiped by an evil LMD and the Magic Demon Book.  Now looking back it does make the fact that the second he had free will again, despite that other manipulated life where he was dedicated to Ophelia, it was still Jemma.   

Oh and Jemma did choose Fitz over Will, when the sandstorm hit.  She continued to go to Fitz and left Will....she would have never left Fitz in a sandstorm with the evil monster lurking about.  

That all being said sometimes crap just has to happen to move the story ahead and there is always a price to pay for the good.   I do think the Framework went too far but at the same time the writers were making a bit of a political statement there and they saw how good Iain was with evil bad guy.  

Shippping Fitzsimmons is a lot like a Marathon and you are about to the “What on earth have I done to myself,” point of the race.  But I promise the feeling of crossing that finish line at the end can’t be beat.

[mc-slowwalker]

hahahahha that’s funny lol (saying that the author of the common enemy fics is c!dream) but yeah common enemy definitely won’t fix the issues cause it’s the cycle of violence that they have to break and that definitely will not be fixed easily

woooo syndicate supremacy (I’ve finally learned how to spell syndicate correctly through our conversation lol) they’re definitely doing better than other people on the server and I love that for them! oh yeah either or both c!tommy and c!dream definitely need to reflect on the fact that they’re both make eachother worse. I absolutely loved how that fic handled that aspect of it because closure and freedom is exactly what I want for c!dream and c!tommy more than anything. yeah exactly!! which is why I don’t like the idea of c!dream dying either cause it just leaves everything unresolved. I doubt that’ll happen in canon tho

yea!! can’t wait for the angst! cc!wilbur just posted on reddit about ghostbur so we’ve already got some more of it 😔✌️which also reminds me that I’m sooo interested to see how c!dream is like once he’s out of prison because so much of the fandom believes different thing and there’s no way that he’s gonna be better or changed cause he’s had no opportunity to plus he’s been through terrible torture for so long and I can’t wait to see the effect of that. which also reminds me that I’ve seen lately that a lot of the fandom seems to think that c!dream was put in the prison as a punishment when it was less about that and more about the fact that he could revive people and that his last canon life would have been taken if not for that fact. a lot of the fandom says he deserves the prison but not the torture as a punishment but that’s not why he was put in the prison and if that was the case literally every other character would deserve the same punishment as well as they’re all characters that have done bad things. I feel like my typing is just getting more and more rambly and less and less well punctuated lol sorry

oh yeah those fandom rules definitely make sense. especially as someone who has been in online fandom spaces for like a long time and has seen all the tumblr discourse lol. like yeah those rules were actually not bad and don’t send death threats or harass people shouldn’t have to be said as much as it is in mcyttwt. I really do wish that the young people in this fandom realise that they’re allowed to just have fun and do what they like in fandom

I think that taking into account the fact that a character is a minor is definitely important I just disagree with the way that a lot of people use it as such a final argument that doesn’t leave room for discussion. yeah I’m the same like when I was younger I used to think I was so grown up but like I’m 18 now and I realise that that’s still so young even though at 18 I’m an adult. basically like the “child” argument is not so black and white either like instead of a defence I think it’s more something that should be taken into account when discussing a characters actions and I definitely agree with the characters you’ve added as people who that can be extended to. and yeah like in real life the minors would face soo many more consequences it’s kind of funny like everyone would but with it being such a prominent topic of discussion it’s funnier applying real life rules to dsmp is often so funny. I agree c!tommy should 100% pay taxes that would be hilarious

ooh yeah the three life system interesting cause at first glance you’d think it makes them worth less but evidently not and I do wonder how the characters see it. like you said with c!foolish and c!puffy it was traumatic to take a first life but for some it just seems as chances and the last life is what actually matters. who it’s against and also circumstance I think matters. I also tend to brush off c!tommy taking two of c!dream’s lives but I also tend to brush off the canon lives lost during the first l’manburg war as it was war and c!dteam and co were just better. I suppose I’m an everything but l’manburg apologist because of its foundations ig although I can still understand and acknowledge it’s importance to the characters such as c!tommy. I’ve seen it said that c!dream deserves prison because he took two of c!tommy’s canon, amongst other reasons of course, but so many other characters have taken canon lives and how do you determine the consequence of that in the dsmp cause in irl it’s very different and in the dsmp so far there really is no consequence for murder. like for example c!punz took two of c!wilburs canon lives (I stan him for that I’m a punz simp what can I say) and other characters have taken canon lives too. hmm I wonder what determined the severity of crimes on the dsmp cause the one character that’s in prison wasn’t actually put in there for his crimes.

hahahaha yeah I just can’t wait till we finally don’t have to reach that much

ahaha fair enough I just sometimes type too fast and autocorrect never seems to know what I want to say and I do not have the brain power to proof read a single thing I write. also I type out the asks in notes and after I sent the last one I was like damn that was really long and pasted it into pages to check. and oh my god this one is over a thousand words that’s like longer than one of essays I wrote for my philosophy final exam😭😭 I am so sorry

I will say though that I am quite enjoying this discussion cause it’s the most in depth discussion I’ve been able to have about this

I saw the angst wilbur put on reddit that mother fucker (affectionate) I actually have a rewlly weird relationship with wilbur’s meta lore. Things I accept: sally is a salmon, fridge mom, all the characters being morally gray. Things I don’t accept: whatever he was trying to do with character ages, also saying revivebur was straight when c!tommy saw him and quackity making out like nice try king. One of my biggest issues with the sever is that I get so easily attached to mobs/npcs in dream smp and they die so easy so Im always sobbing,,,, if anything happens to shroud, yogurt, michael (notchill), or fran I’ll mcfucking lose it

For c!dream getting out of prison I see there being only two routes: 1. he’s worse by a lot more evil more fucked up or 2. He’ll be actually too fucked up/tired/traumatized to do shit. Either of which is gonna hurt the sever so I’m looking forward to it personally

Other real life things I think should be implemented into dream smp: jury duty, required 3 life insurance, dentsits, and OSHA

I do think the rebellion against c!dream (in the final control room) is really interrsting in that c!tommy/c!punz was about to organize a bunch of the server against dream? I know c!tommy has amazing puppy eyes tm but c!punz was able to organize a big group of people, half of them didn’t really have that much against dream (other than the l’manburg people) and were only there on more vague terms. Like c!hbomb and c!ponk really didn’t have shit against dream but still helped in getting him into prison

I feel like we’re always gonna have to reach a little bit and oh shit 1,000 words? Bruh half my classes require that and I have yet to actually right that much. it’s way easier with stuff you’re passionate about and with all the content dream smp has gives way more to analyze

[thisweekingundamwing]

This Week in Gundam Wing June 28 - 4 July 2020

Here’s this week’s roundup!

Remember to give your content creators some love! And join in on the events at the bottom!

~Mod Hel PS. So, I’m really bad at checking my email... I really need to get better at it. Some of these (which I’m sure will be new to a lot of you) are from long before this last week... whoops.

Fanfiction/Snippets/AU Ideas:

@bobo-is-tha-bomb​

Five dates with Mister Handsome https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622383229580771328/five-dates-with-mister-handsome

1xReader (gender unspecified)

reader-insert, second person POV, fluff, romance

He was sinfully good looking and he had agreed to five dates with an idiotic drunk who claimed one single kiss was worth five dates. You couldn’t help but wonder why.

@coffeetailor​

Emergence (Ch. 11) https://archiveofourown.org/works/13322880/chapters/60710743

Duo Maxwell/Heero Yuy

Duo Maxwell, Heero Yuy, Quatre Raberba Winner, Trowa Barton, Chang Wufei, Sally Po

Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, borrowers fusion but don't call them borrowers, disturbing themes like people trafficking from the bad guys, Size Difference, Will probably be a series, alternate canon events, Macro/Micro

When the war ended, things went a little strange. First, Duo vanished after never having let them see him in person. Then, years later, a tiny race of people are discovered. And that's just the start of things.

Fun Curses with Catboys https://archiveofourown.org/works/25047898

Chang Wufei/Duo Maxwell

Chang Wufei, Duo Maxwell

magic transformation, Size Difference, catboy, Anal Sex, Post-Canon, Magic, wufei's a wizard, thar be porn

When Wufei leaves the Preventers, Duo goes snooping and finds out some things about his favorite (crush) loner. Like his hobbies in gardening, rare book collecting, and… magic? Probably shouldn’t have touched that, Duo. Good thing it’s a fun curse, and there’s a sexy wizard around to help out.

@chronicwhimsy​

Strangers (Ch. 6) https://archiveofourown.org/works/24357013/chapters/60473569

Chang Wufei/Duo Maxwell, Background Quatre x Relena, Background Heero x Trowa - Character

OC - Oliver McGann

Long Lost Twins, this was meant to be hijinks but then I got reminded these boys have Issues, Pining, Duo is a stressed-out jerk who needs a holiday, Post-EW, Frozen Teardrop can do one, sex in later chapters because this is me who are we kidding

If you said the word "brother" to Duo Maxwell, he'd think of the other pilots.

If you said, "no, your long-lost brother" to Duo Maxwell, he'd think of Solo and be very confused.

If you said, "no, your twin brother you were separated from at birth, and he's now working with the Preventers as a lawyer" to Duo Maxwell, he would go and punch his doppelganger.

Duo Maxwell isn't good at dealing with things, but unfortunately this particular thing isn't going to go away that easily.

@destinysblackrose​

It Takes a Legend... https://archiveofourown.org/works/25012021

Relena Peacecraft/Heero Yuy, Relena Peacecraft & Heero Yuy, Duo Maxwell/Hilde Schbeiker

Heero Yuy, Relena Peacecraft, Trowa Barton, Duo Maxwell, Duo Maxwell Jr., Hilde Schbeiker, Chang Wufei

Angst, Fluff, Domestic Fluff, Slice of Life, Duo's going to have his ribs broken, Gundam Wing children, #fatherhood, Fatherhood, Father's Day, Crass Humor, teenaged boy humor

“Listen, I can’t possibly imagine what it’s like to be you. You never had a childhood. And you never had a father—” 

“No,” Heero shook his head. “I didn’t. I trained to fight, to kill from…as far back as I can remember.” The visible side of his mouth, from Aidan’s vantage point, turned down.  

“It’s why,” he paused and picked up a wrench from the open drawer. “It’s why sometimes...I’m, I’m at a total loss…” He dropped the hand holding the wrench to his side. Aidan could see his knuckles change color where he throttled the metal implement.  

“Your mom is so much, better at these things… At being there for you.”

@doctormegalomania​

Introspective https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622202012283584512/introspective

Implied 1x2, implied 3x4, implied past 2xH, past 1xR

self-exploration of gender identity and sexuality, reference to past sexual situations (non-explicit), candid conversations

Heero gives some thought to his sexuality.

Your Body’s Poetry (Ch. 20) https://archiveofourown.org/works/20438891/chapters/60737623

Duo Maxwell/Heero Yuy, Trowa Barton/Quatre Raberba Winner, Chang Wufei/Original Female Character(s), Relena Peacecraft & Heero Yuy, Duo Maxwell/Original Male Character(s)

Characters: Heero Yuy, Duo Maxwell, Trowa Barton, Quatre Raberba Winner, Chang Wufei, Sally Po, Relena Peacecraft, Lucrezia Noin, Zechs Merquise, Hilde Schbeiker

Past Relationship(s), Slice of Life, Post-Break Up, Slow Burn, Developing Relationship, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence

Long after the wars, long after peace is established the Gundam Pilots discover one immovable fact: Relationships are hard work.

@duointherain​

Beneath: All Those Sounds https://duointherain.tumblr.com/post/622765434690781184/beneath-all-those-sounds-11

Notes: The boys are 35. They are married and they live in Seattle. Heero is a physician and a research scientist. Duo is a stay at home dad and a best selling novelist. They have twins who are spending the holiday with their grandmother Maureen and their godmothers, Rey and Precious. 

It didn’t take much. Neither of them said anything. The fireworks exploded outside their house, somewhere down by the water, far enough away that it was just a soft little press against the windows, against their souls.

Left on Read https://duointherain.tumblr.com/post/622787629087440896/fic-left-on-read-1

Duo Maxwell had decided, several years before, that he didn’t much like Preventers. At the time, he hadn’t know what he did like either. The therapist that Quatre had talked him into seeing had told him this was normal. Trauma would leave a person with little self, especially if the trauma had happened early and consistently. He had said quiet loudly, that day that he had plenty of self, everyone thought so! He was loud and brash and brave and drank too much, and had more lovers than she’d probably had in her whole boring life

@lemontrash​

The Morning Brightens https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622390770875465728/the-morning-brightens

4x5

established relationship, coming out fic, fluff

After a night of not sleeping on it, Wufei discusses something important with Quatre.

@lifeaftermeteor​

Pride https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622300166716833793/pride

1x2

pride parade, slice of life, fluff, asexual duo

Duo has only recently come to terms with his asexuality. It took him a long time to understand it, and even longer to embrace it as inherently part of himself. To celebrate, Heero takes him out onto the streets for New York City’s Pride.

@relenaforpresident​

Just Love: Queerness in Gundam Wing https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622292634598293504/just-love-queerness-in-gundam-wing

No ships but reference to both 1xR and 1x2

non-fiction, personal essay, self-reflection, gender, queerness, fandom

A personal essay on how the Gundam Wing series and fandom community helped me change my personal beliefs on love and gender.

@simulacraryn​

Donguri https://archiveofourown.org/works/24733540

General Audiences

Choose Not To Use Archive Warnings

Heero Yuy, Odin Lowe

A short piece about Odin Lowe and his young protégé. This is an excerpt from a longer (discontinued) 2009 fic I once posted on ff.net ("Kaifuku"), but it can be read as a standalone piece.

Heero’s Inheritance https://archiveofourown.org/works/24658531

General Audiences

Heero Yuy, Odin Lowe

Illustrations, Headcanon

Just a short headcanon about Heero's past. Illustrated work.

TheManwell

A Season for Vengeance (Ch. 10) https://archiveofourown.org/works/22508074/chapters/53785717

Explicit

Trowa Barton/Duo Maxwell, Solo/Heero Yuy

Trowa Barton, Duo Maxwell, Catherine Bloom, Cathy's son (OC), Cathy's husband (OC), Heero Yuy, Zechs Merquise, Quinze (Gundam Wing), Solo (Gundam Wing), Nichol (Gundam Wing), Lucrezia Noin

dude in distress, Trowa for MVP, things that go boom, Backstory things, modern day AU, Sequel, alternating pov, Trowa POV, Duo POV

It's been over a year since Duo and Trowa escaped the pain and betrayal and danger of their pasts, went off the grid and started building a new life together. But when Duo's birthday comes and goes without a single obnoxious message from his older brother, they know something is wrong. It's time to break cover and check in. The only problem is that Duo's brother works for a powerful government agency, so making that call will put Duo and Trowa on their radar...

Fanart/Crafts/Photo Manips:

@antarespromise​

https://antarespromise.tumblr.com/post/622394387634257921

Quatre Raberba Winner, fanart

@bettertasting​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622198278449168385/title-proud-artist-cindy-bettertasting

Gboys Pride Banner, @wingqueero​, fanart

@bobo-is-tha-bomb​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622296415384764416/title-in-the-name-of-justice-and-love-artist

Pride Leo “In the name of Justice and Love”, @wingqueero​, gunpla

@coffeetailor​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622303966073683968/title-special-delivery-artist-coffee

Duo/WuFei, @wingqueero​, fanart

@daddywarbats​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622213395485229056/title-just-gals-being-pals-or-not-artist

Hilde/Relena, @wingqueero​, fanart

@deathscythehell​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622209566153818112/artist-tami-deathscythehell-description-one

Duo/Quatre (best dads), @wingqueero​, fanart (comic)

@deejayers​

https://deejayers.tumblr.com/post/622482172907077632/and-wing-is-complete-talk-about-a-monster-this

Wing, gunpla

@gundayum​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622439861179351040/hi-all-gundayum-here-im-gonna-try-and-not-make

Important Thank You, and some partied out WuFei, @wingqueero​, fanart

@gwfrozentears​

https://gwfrozentears.tumblr.com/post/622495742005772288/por-siempre-mi-pareja-favorita

Heero & Relena

https://gwfrozentears.tumblr.com/post/622493743305621504/he-comenzado-a-dibujar-nuevamente-inspirada-en-el

Heero

https://gwfrozentears.tumblr.com/post/622494840371970048

Heero

https://gwfrozentears.tumblr.com/post/622499630050066432

Heero

https://gwfrozentears.tumblr.com/post/622548456296300544

Heero

https://gwfrozentears.tumblr.com/post/622507185094721536

Heero/Relena

@lokineko​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622205797731123200/title-quiet-happiness-artist-lokineko

Trowa/Heero, @wingqueero​, fanart

lotopauanka

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622288883271467008/title-just-married-artist-lotopauanka-social

Heero/Duo, @wingqueero, fanart

@oekakimemo​

https://oekakimemo.tumblr.com/post/622350648656134144/20200630-traditional-painting

Relena Darlian/Peacecraft, fanart

@page-of-wands11​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622379476560609280/title-colourful-kiss-artist-page-of-wands

Heero/Duo, @wingqueero, fanart

@seitou​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622394541550534656/title-pride-walk-artist-seitou-seitou-social

Pride Walk, @wingqueero, fanart

@tatakaumono​

https://tatakaumono.tumblr.com/post/621743027371819008/happy-24-day-pride-dont-tag-as

Quatre/Duo, fanart

@theboringbluecrayon​

https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/post/622387009366982656/title-family-pride-wip-artist-blue

Trowa/Quatre & Family, @wingqueero, fanart

Photosets/Gifsets/Screenshots/Manga Pages:

@bobo-is-tha-bomb​

https://bobo-is-tha-bomb.tumblr.com/post/622708372721025024/never-though-they-would-come-in-but-here-they

GW OST CDs, photo

https://bobo-is-tha-bomb.tumblr.com/post/622456639940919296/always-nice-when-the-mail-man-stops-by

gw artbooks, and other merch, photo

@cuteciboulette​

https://cuteciboulette.tumblr.com/post/622269950937186304/another-extract-from-the-cover-of-the

Heero/Duo, doujinshi “Toki no suna” by Sango Show cover

Fandom Discourse:

@2pcb has created a wonderful discord for gw artists who would like monthly prompts to get those creative juices flowing! DM them if you’d like to join!

@hanryuu would like to know whether anyone has translated the Blind Target drama cds. If you have any information on that we would be grateful!

Quotes:

@incorrectgundamwingquotes​

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/622379465062924288/duo-why-do-bigfoot-hunters-try-to-lure-him-with-a

Duo, Trowa, & WuFei

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/622560690151047168/wufei-we-can-talk-about-normality-until-the-cows

WuFei, Heero, Trowa, & Duo

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/622470062887075840/heero-run-thisdoesntbothermeexe-brain-file

Heero

Calendar Events:

@gwcocktailfriday​

Cocktail Fridays!

Post responses on Friday, during Happy Hour between 3 & 5 pm in your own timezone.

Here’s the prompt for Friday, July 10th! https://gwcocktailfriday.tumblr.com/post/622719166375493632/raspberry-mango-sangria-yield-1-pitcher-prep

In need of FALL/AUTUMN prompts!

@gwoc-october​

GW OC October 2020!

Help pick out prompts!

https://gwoc-october.tumblr.com/post/621130082429337600/hello-gundam-wing-folks-thats-right-gw-oc

@seasons-of-gundamwing

Voting Results: https://seasons-of-gundamwing.tumblr.com/post/622566396369485824/looks-like-well-be-doing-a-hilde-week-thanks-to

Summer of Hilde!

In need of prompts! https://seasons-of-gundamwing.tumblr.com/post/622567839387271168/summer-of-hilde-prompt-call

@wingqueero

Gundam Wing Pride Party 2020

Come check out all the amazing works! https://wingqueero.tumblr.com/

[deadanddeactivated]

Together

Fandom: Sanders Sides, Powers AU Pairing:  Anxceit (with a faint hint of intrulogical) Characters: Virgil, Deceit, Remus, Others Mentions Notes: Day 11 of the fluffuary event being hosted by @tsshipmonth2020​​ - Anxceit. Warnings: Semi-graphic injuries at the start Summary: When Dante imagined Virgil coming back, it was never like this.

AO3

--

Dante has imagined, many times, what would happen if Virgil were to appear on his door.  He’s imagined Virgil sheepish and shy, quietly asking forgiveness.  He’s envisioned Virgil walking through the door as though he’d never left.  In his nightmares, he’s watched Virgil march through that door with the heroes at his back.

He never thought of this.  Of Virgil desperately clutching at his side, hoodie stained with red and eyes almost unseeing.

“I didn’t know where else to go.”  He manages before he collapses.  Dante barely gets over his shock in time to catch him.

For a moment he just stands there, staring at Virgil’s much too pale face, trying to figure out what’s going on here.  

Then the sound of blood dripping onto the concrete hits his ears and Dante decides it doesn’t matter.  Virgil is bleeding out, that comes first.  Answers can come later.

“Remus!”  He calls.  “I don’t need a hand out here!”

“Just one?”  Remus calls back, laughing at his own bad joke, right up until he steps into the corridor and sees what’s going on.  “Is that…?”

“Don’t help me get him to the bed.”  Dante orders.  

“You can’t be serious De.”  Remus huffs, even as he manifests extra arms that have no trouble lifting the unconscious super.  “He left us.”

“What did you want me to do?”  Dante snaps.  “Leave him on the side of the street to bleed out?!”

“You could have sent ‘im back to the others.  I could send him back to the others.”  Remus offers, even as he places Virgil gently down on the bed that used to be his.  Just a year and a lifetime ago.

“No, he didn’t come to m- to us.  That doesn’t mean something.”  Dante claims.  That gets a shrug as he and Remus start to go through the motions - wounds, even the life-threatening kind, are familiar.

“If you say so.”  He says.

--

Two days later, Dante knows this isn’t so familiar.  There’s just no reason that Virgil should still be asleep.  They’ve dealt with the wound, bandaged and stitched and cleaned.  He doesn’t have any other lumps or bruises or, or anything.  Dante’s checked a thousand times.

So why isn’t Virgil waking up?

“The goody-two-shoes don’t know anything helpful.”  Remus announces as he returns, front door slamming behind him.  

“I thought you weren’t looking around our contacts.  The heroes are our contacts.”  Dante comments, eyes not leaving Virgil and words mumbled.

“I wasn’t trying to ask them.”  Remus huffs, stepping into the room.  If Dante looked, he’d see Remus appeared just as worried.  He didn’t need to.  “However, brother dearest decided to come interrogate me about his missing ‘friend’.  Apparently they think we kidnapped him.”

“He didn’t come to us.”  Dante rolls his eyes.

“That’s what I said!”  Remus claims.  “Well, almost.  I think it was technically ‘maybe he just showed up on our doorstep’, and Roman said ‘bullshit, we know you fuckers took him.  Now give him back asshole’.”

“You’re brother definitely swears that much.”  Dante mutters.

“I might be ad libbing.”  Remus admits.  “But the point is, Roman went on about how Pretty Boy listed the facts.  That Virgil went looking for something, got attacked, and that our power was involved.  He seems to think that means it’s my fault, even though it could technically be him that kidnapped Virgil!”

“Someone kidnapped Virgil.”  Dante reminds, although he supposes he doesn’t know that.  Was Virgil kidnapped?  Did he get away only to end up on their door?  Or was he simply attacked?  They just wouldn’t know until Virgil woke up.  

If he woke up.

“He’s demanding we return Virgil by tonight, otherwise he intends to find us and storm the place.”  Remus finally finishes the story.  “Geez, the way he was going on you’d think he’d had a crush on Virgil.”

“Continue.”  Dante growls.  He has enough to worry about right now, what with Virgil laying half dead on the bed, he doesn’t need to be thinking about something like that too.

Damnit, things had been going so well.  Or at least, he thought so.  He and Virgil were tethering the line between friends and something more, standing on the ‘something more’ side more often than not.  They weren’t making a lot of progress with Messiah but-

Wait.

Wait.

“Did you say your power was involved?”  He asks, suddenly perking up.

“Well I said it was probably Roman’s, but that’s what Roman said Pretty Boy said.”  Remus confirms.

“That isn’t why he’s not waking up!”  Dante realizes.  “Messiah didn’t use some of your power!”

“He was stabbed with a sword.  Or a knife.  Maybe a dagger.”  Remus suggests, catching on.  “It must be Roman’s power, his power always ends up in the sharp things, mine prefers the whacky things.”

“I would call a mace a ‘whacky thing’.”  Dante huffs.  “I’m not almost impressed they got hold of Roman’s powers.”  Messiah has little trouble ‘borrowing’ their powers.  That had been the whole point of kidnapping them years ago.  Well, it probably hadn’t been the whole point but they’d managed to escape before Messiah could do anything else.

However using the goody-too-shoes powers?  That isn’t so common.  Messiah needs to get a hold of blood to steal any time they try.  A task made slightly easier by the fact the good guy squad has no idea Messiah exists, perhaps.  There was nothing they could do about that, Messiah’s antics had already got them labeled ‘villains’ and they had no proof.  The heroes would never believe them.  

Besides, they’d all agreed it wasn’t worth risking Thomas that way.  Who knows what that kind of paranoia would do to a hidden powerhouse like him.

“If they did use Roman’s powers I can’t do anything.”  Remus points out, sounding a lot more frustrated about it than his pose might suggest.  “I can’t destroy his wishes any more than he can destroy mine.”

“Yes.”  Dante agrees.  “But I can’t.”

“Dante.”  Remus frowns.  “That’s a bad idea.”

“No it isn’t.”  He knows full well it’s a terrible idea.  Lying a wish out of existence is much like lying to turn off gravity - it isn’t easy.  The only difference is the wish doesn’t come back.  “We have another choice.”

“Okay.”  Remus agrees after a minute.  “If I come back in here and you’re a snake, I’m going to be mad.”  He adds, stepping out of the room.  Dante can’t begrudge him for that.  Remus doesn’t often talk about the waking nightmares that balance his wishes, but he’s mentioned they always get worse when a wish breaks.  Especially if the wish is his brothers.

Once Dante is sure Remus is far away, he turns to Virgil and takes a deep breath.  Then, he turns the truth into a lie.

“You are asleep.”  He says, the words almost physically painful as he forces them out his throat.  A sickening sensation overcomes up but, when Dante opens his eyes, he’s still human.  Just a few more scales then.  That’s okay, he can live with that.

Especially when Virgil jolts up in the bed, gasping for a breath.

“Thanks for the helpful guide.”  Dante mutters, trying to mask how happy he is.  “We definitely knew how to help right away.”

“I didn’t have a lot of time.”  Virgil claims.  “How long was I out?  It was only a knock off wish, can’t have been two long.”  He almost sounds like he’s muttering to himself as he tries to look anywhere but at Dante.

“You weren’t out for two whole days.  I didn’t have to wake up.”  Dante answers.  That gets Virgil’s attention, mismatched eyes opening wide.

“I’m sorry.”  He says.  “I just thought I’d sleep it off.  That’s not why I came here.”

“I don’t care.”  Dante huffs then mentally curses.  “Why did you come here?”

“I couldn’t go to the others, they’d have freaked.”  Virgil claims.  

“So you still haven’t told them?”  He sighs.

“You’re the one that said we shouldn’t!”  Virgil argues.

“That’s exactly what I meant, Fear.”  Dante says, eyes narrowing at the way Virgil flinches.

“Oh.”  He mumbles.  “I uh, I told Thomas.”

“And the others.”  Dante notes, rolling his eyes again.

“You don’t get it, I can’t!”  Virgil claims.

“Oh I don’t get it.  You’re not ashamed of it, or us.”  Dante scoffs.  It’s strange how quickly hurt and anger can come back when the owner of your broken heart isn’t on his deathbed.

“That’s not it!”  Virgil argues.

“It certainly doesn’t seem like it!”  Dante snaps back.  “You didn’t suddenly love being the good guy, we weren’t suddenly worse than the dirt on your shoe, and then you didn’t move on with your life and didn’t forget you were ever a villian!”  Not that any of them were really villains but, with Messiah ruining their reputation it was hard to convince anyone else of that. 

“That’s not what happened!”  Virgil shouts.  

“Then what did?!”  Dante demands.  Why did you leave, he can’t bring himself to say.  At first Virgil hesitates and Dante’s ready to give up on the answer, to just scoff and leave.

Then Virgil grabs his hand and Dante feels a jolt run through him.  Virgil knows full well that, with them touching, he can’t lie.  It was something he’d taken advantage of many a time when his anxieties made it hard to say something.

Apparently this is one of those moments.

“I was scared.”  He admits.

“What?”  Dante frowns.

“I was scared.”  Virgil says again.  “I was falling in love with you and I was scared.  So I ran away, and I said I was just getting close to them to keep an eye on Thomas.  But then things went so much… better than I thought they would.  And I started thinking maybe we were wrong not to tell them about Messiah, maybe they would believe us.  But I knew they’d hate me for lying and I just… I just didn’t know what to do.  So I ignored everything.  I decided I really was just Virgil, some random kid with powers and not Fear.  And I was… I was so horrible to you and Remus and I’m so sorry.”

There is… there’s a lot there for Dante to unpack but Virgil still has a gaping wound in his side.  That doesn’t look like ‘ignoring’ things.

“If you weren’t ignoring things, how did you get yourself hurt?”  He asks.  

“Messiah’s getting bolder.”  Virgil says.  “I was hoping I could find answers, I guess I kind of did.  They had a far amount of Romans swords.”

“Great.”  Dante sighs.  He gives it a moments thought but there’s not anything more pressing to ask so… “You were falling in love with me?”  He asks.  Virgil’s face turns red and he quickly pulls his hand away buy Dante smirks.  He’s not letting Virgil off that easy.  Leaning over, he rests his hand on Virgil’s cheek.  “Virg…” 

“Yes.”  Virgil admits. 

“Surely you didn’t know I felt the same.  I wasn’t obvious about it at all.”  Dante says.

“I couldn’t be sure!”  Virgil argues, and then Dante’s words fully sink in.  “Wait, really?”

“No.”  Dante smiles.  “Your side!”  He scolds when Virgil half-leaps into him, wrapping his arms tight around Dante’s neck.

“I’ve had worse.”  Virgil shrugs.  “You’re coming back with me.”  He adds.

“What?”

“You and Remus.  We’re going to the others and we’re telling them everything - Messiah, Fear.  All of it.  Then we can sort something out, together.”  Virgil decides.  “I’m done running.”  

There’s a part of Dante that doesn’t like that idea, that thinks it’s too dangerous to tell the others about Messiah.  That fears they’ll laugh in their faces if they do.

But a larger part of him thinks that, with Virgil in his arms, he can do anything.

[progressivestupidity]

IZ week 2020

so i wasn’t gonna do this because I didn’t think the prompts were very good for writing to, but I remembered the last day’s prompt was “role swap” so I decided to do something small and quick for it. this is all 7 days in one post. the first and last ones are drabbles and one of them is an au idea

@invader-zim-week​ here u go!!!

Day 1. Angst or Fluff 

Zim’s denial skills are god tier, but even they have their limits.

Drabble. I think this is the turning point for my eventual found family au

“When are you going to get it through your thick head that the Tallests aren’t coming?” Dib flings his arms out wide in his exasperation

“They’re just…!” Zim fumbles a bit, clenching and unclenching his fists. “The Armada is a million light years away! It takes time to travel that far, obviously. It took me six of your months to get here from Conventia and the Massive is further away from here now than that. They’ll come! You’ll see! And then you’ll be sorry!” Zim’s face is drawn tight. He’s tense all over, shoulders drawn up to his jaw, antennae pressed flat to his head, and normally Dib prides himself on reading Zim like an open book, but he’s too far gone in his own annoyance to see the warning signs.

It’s because he doesn’t see these red flags that Dib proceeds to stick his own foot in his mouth with his next words. “Maybe if you weren’t such an idiot and opened your eyes, you’d see the truth—that they dumped you here to get rid of you.”

“YOU THINK I DON’T KNOW THAT?” Zim explodes, planting his tiny hands in Dib’s chest and shoving. The boy lands painfully on his ass. “I’m not stupid, Dib.” His name is spat like an insult. “I know they don’t care about me! Why do you think I try so hard?”

Dib gapes at Zim, looking up at him for once, stunned into silence. “I.” He swallows. “You know?”

“Of course, I know.” Zim’s voice is a low hiss and his eyes are narrowed to slits. “You don’t get banished and then just get over it. You don’t get put on trial to defend your life, forced to relive your worse mistakes, and get sentenced to death, only to be saved by freak miracle, and never acknowledge it happened.” Zim takes a deep breath and crosses his arms over his chest. Dib supposes he means for it to look intimidating, but it looks more like he’s holding himself together. “I’ve always known.”

“Why do you try so hard then? If you’ve always known there was no point?” Dib has to ask, has to know, has to hear the words from Zim’s own mouth.

Zim purses his lips and turns away. “There was always a point.” He falls silent for a moment, one antenna twitching up a bit in thought. “I just… I thought if I was just a little better, if I accomplished something important for once, that… I don’t know, that maybe I’d.” He pauses and grits his teeth. “Maybe if I actually managed to take over this filthy planet I’d be worth something for once.”

Day 2. Be Gay Do Crime (LGBTQA+ headcannons)

Dib is bi/pan/demi-ro, Gaz is lesbian, Zim is ace/demi-ro

Headcanons.

Dib seems like the kind of guy that would both take whatever kind of relationship he could get, but also appreciate it. Dib isn’t afraid to work for what he wants and isn’t afraid of things that are “not normal” so I see him being the type to not care about the gender of whoever he eventually decides to date. However, because Dib’s been burned in the past, he would need a deep and sincere emotional relationship to see someone as a potential romantic partner.

Gaz is just a big lesbian. Girls, man.

Zim is ace all the way baby!!! He’s just not interested, and sure, part of that is me projecting, but it just feels right for Zim to just… not care. He has no interest and doesn’t care for sexual attraction regardless of whether or not Irkens do/can/will have sex or not. On the other hand, Zim has expressed a softer side before and I can see him being able to maybe eventually develop romantic feelings for someone if he actually manages to get close enough to them for those kinds of feelings to even emerge. It would take a lot of time and a deep, meaningful friendship, but Zim has shown he’s capable of love. He just has to let himself feel it.

  Day 3. Fandom Appreciation

Found family fuck yeah

Headcanons.

I’m still in the process of thinking about how I wanna go about my found family au so here’s just some initial ideas

After ETF, Zim self isolates for a bit. The florpus hole was his Last Ditch Effort plan and had it succeeded, he knew he would have been destroyed too. He was okay with it. He had made peace with it. However, it failed, and now he’s forced to reflect on said failure

The Massive doesn’t escape the florpus. They’re gone, completely. If they the ship does manage to get out, it’s not in one piece

I initially couldn’t decide if The Trial should come Before ETF or After but I think im gonna say before so the Massive doesn’t have to come back lmao

Before too long, Zim jumps back into the planning/scheming swing of things, but his ideas are never more than petty crimes and being a huge annoyance

Dib gets really annoyed with him and they have a big argument

Zim finally admits to knowing of his own Defectiveness

Dib reluctantly feels bad for him and backs off a bit to let Zim have his space

Zim, however, sees this as a betrayal and redoubles his efforts to get his attention

Somewhere along the way, Skoodge comes back and Zim backs off of Dib a bit, having someone else to focus attention on

Dib eventually begins to offer Zim his hand in friendship (phrased as a truce at first) and they finally make steps towards getting along

They realize they actually really like being friends

Zim eventually realizes that he’s made a life for himself, outside of the Empire

Eventually Zim, Skoodge, GIR, Minimoose, Dib, and Gaz form their own little family and explore space and hunt cryptids

(I love cryptid hunter and space exploration aus holy shit)

Day 4. If IZ had a different setting/time period

Cyberpunk??? Sure

Potential idea maybe.

Cyberpunk dystopian future

Aliens and humans intermingle, both on and off Earth

The Irken Empire has gotten bigger

Technology is advanced and cybernetics are widely known/produced

Idk man I don’t know a lot about cyberpunk, maybe this should be more for the aesthetic

Day 5. Aesthetic

Big shrug man idk

Headcanons, thoughts.

I’m a big fan of fashion Zim, and whenever I get the chance I give him clothes that are both cute and comfortable

Galaxy print leggings are a personal favorite of mine to give him

One time I wrote a little ficlet/oneshot where he wore a skirt. I should publish that some day

Uhhhhhh okay so. Dib has veeeeeery big early 2000s emo/punk vibes tbh

Scene kid GIR always makes me laugh

Gaz could pull off pastel goth like no one’s business

I’ve been here long enough to witness emo/scene hair wig Zim and his eventual fall lmfao

Pretty much everyone that redesigned them back in the day gave Zim emo kid hair that fall perfectly over one eye it was WILD

 Day 6. What if IZ was a different Genre?

Uhhhh does “fantasy instead of scifi” count?

Potential idea maybe. (oops it ended up being a fantasy/modern magic au haha ooooops)

Instead of being an alien, I had the idea of, maybeeeeee Irkens are like. Elves maybe, or perhaps some kind of fae. (I don’t know much about fae, oops)

Okay bear with me here, this is all coming together in real time.

The Irkens (which is what I’m gonna call their clan or faction or subrace or whatever) still want to be the rulers or something over the humans/other mystical beings. This world of magic is hidden from humans and they live blissfully unaware. There are invaders all over the place, using magic and glamors to trick humans into thinking they’re also humans. Zim is one such invader and just to happens to end up in Dib’s town, whereupon he enrolls in Dib’s school, pretending to be a transfer student.

I have no idea why or how the Irkens invade or what methods they use, but since my biggest experience with elves is through DND, I’m going to say they’re functionally similar to certain DND elf races.

So anyway, Zim ends up in Dib’s class and Zim’s glamor just Doesn’t Work on Dib for whatever reason (maybe Dib passed his Wisdom saving throw while literally everyone else failed, idk) and so Dib can immediately see Zim for what he is.

Dib is still into paranormal type stuff, though in his world, he’s less about cryptids and aliens and more about the magical species/world(s) that he KNOWS exists. His big goal in his au is similar to canon in that he wants to expose it all for recognition and love from his father.

Zim, meanwhile, he just wants to prove himself, just like canon. I can’t decide how I want the Irken hierarchy to go in this au—that’s something to think about later, when I have more time—but whatever it is, Zim is either a) not very good at it, b) not suited for it, c) ridiculed for not fitting in to it, or d) a combination of any or all of these things. (or secret option e) he rejects it but has no where else to go. On the other hand, it maybe be none of these things.)

GIR is here too though he’s probably not a robot. Maybe he’s another kind of magical being, or, hell, maybe he’s just Zim’s little brother. I’d be okay with that.

Gaz can also see through glamors but she just doesn’t care. Tak shows up at some point to get revenge, and Skoodge also shows up at some point to stay with Zim and be his friend.

Zim is bad at blending in at first, but he eventually Does get better, since he’s not totally isolated from other Irkens here and he also doesn’t Look like an alien.

(I’m thinkin’ elves in this au look Mostly human but with a few differences. Since I’m biased and this is MY fantasy world, damnit, elves are just. Really Pretty. Ethereal and elegant and graceful (for the most part—there are always exceptions) and they’re also great at magic. Maybe Zim isn’t all that great at magic, I dunno. I’ll figure something out.)

This ended up being less of a genre change and more of a whole ass au, lol oops

Day 7. Role swap

Chanting: human zim au human zim au human zim au human zi

Drabble. This is for an ongoing species swap au that i’ve had in development for the last few years. i haven’t posted anything for it yet, but I’ve thought about it a lot

Dib freezes as Zim points the plastic water gun at his head. Zim’s eyes are narrowed, lips pursed, and he adjusts his grip almost nervously. Behind him, Gir is holding a bucket full of water balloons and a pair of neon green star shaped sunglasses. It’d be cute if Dib wasn’t aware of how painful Earth water is to his Irken skin.

Zim finally lowers his gun slightly. “I want some answers, alien.” He looks Dib over with critical eyes. “Who are you really, and why are you here?” He reaches back and Gir hands him a water balloon with a big smile. “And you better tell the truth or I’ll bust this over your big head.”

Dib grimaces and watches the balloon. “My name Dib, and I’m a scientist. I’m an Irken, from Irk, and I’m here to learn more about life on this planet.” He holds his hands up, hoping to placate the human gesture for surrender. “I’m not here to harm you or anyone else, promise.”

Zim huffs. “Yeah right. I bet you just came here to laugh at the locals.” He puts on a mocking voice and waves the gun and balloon as he speaks. “‘Stupid, stinking humans. They can’t even travel beyond their own moon, yet. What morons. I bet they descended from pigs with how horrible and stupid they are.’” He jams the gun against Dib’s chest. “Tell me I’m wrong.”

Dib bites his lower lip and looks away. He can’t deny he hasn’t thought something similar since arriving on Earth, but Zim didn’t have to be so crude and blunt about it.

The two are at a standoff for almost a minute before Zim blows out a long sigh and steps back. He turns to put the balloon back in the bucket, gives Gir a pat on the head, and shoots Dib one last glare. “Stay away from me, Dib. I have enough problems to deal with without having to worry about whether or not it’s safe for my brother to go to school or if I need to watch my back while walking my dog.”

“I wouldn’t hurt you,” Dib says, a little put out.

Zim scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Yeah, I’ve heard that one before. I know better than to believe it.” He turns and tries to smile at Gir but it comes out a little twisted and sad. “C’mon Gir. Let’s go home and get Minimoose and take him to that dog park you like so much.”

Gir gasps and lets out a cheer. “Can we go get ice cream afterwards?”

Zim gives a little laugh, smile turning a bit more genuine. “Yeah, sounds good.”

As they walk away Dib can’t help but wonder why he ever thought Zim was an Irken himself.

[vagabcnds]

i have tossed around making this post for months now, gone back and forth with myself and my friends about if it would even be worth posting this. honestly, i don’t know if telling my side of this is going to do any good, but i think it’s time that i added some more information to this whole situation so that even more people can see that our friends (and i use that term with as much sarcasm as possible) @seattlehqrpg​ , as well as her other rp @canterlotislandhq​​ , have not changed, and will not change. this is indeed another psa about this woman, but with some more information and one on one conversations with the woman. 

hey hi, hello, so, my name is maig, i’ve been around the rpc for over a decade, and right now you might recognize my multifandom : @hiddenwashington​ . we’re an appless multifandom that i started up two years ago. and over those two years, we have dealt with jasmine, jazzy, jackie, jacqueline, whatever j name she wants to call herself this time, on and off, for that duration. 

and just to clear up some information from other psas, i do not believe this is the same nova/jazzy that was terrorizing groups last year with attacking and fighting admins. we’ve spoken with j multiple times, as well as jazzy/nova, and honestly i can tell for sure these are not the same people. unfortunately, there is more than one bad egg in the rpc.

i have a ton of screenshots, so forgive me for not using them all. a link to a google drive will be at the end of this, for all of the screenshots i have of stolen asks, interactions, etc. but i’ll just be using key information for this specific post. or else we’ll be here all day.

when we first encountered j (we’ll just use “j” for now since she focuses on whatever name we call her more than the content of the psas. and all her aliases start with it idk), we thought she was just another person who wanted to join but sort of went about it the wrong way. we first got an anon on the main, asking if our current ginny (that being me) would be willing to give her up. because j wanted to play her. 

we had gotten an anon asking about if we were welcoming towards people with social anxiety (or something like that. it’s been two years now since this all happened so specifics are a little fuzzy. like i said we’ve been dealing with her for so long.) i pretty much hit her with “i’m not willing to drop her because i still want to play her but hmu on my character account and we can chat about other characters for you to play”. i had no idea that answering it would lead us down this rabbit hole i’m writing about today. we sorta chatted, she kinda just rambled to me about how she wanted to write someone not like her so she could have a challenge. valid. i tried helping out, i didn’t really know what fandoms she was into so i said what i could and then went onto the main. when i got back onto my account, she had taken it upon herself to critique my portrayal of ginny, asking if she would ever say ‘dick’. she kept messaging me, sandwiching that comment between other questions. i told her i didn’t appreciate unsolicited critiques. i tried to move past it but she kept at me about it. telling me she hadn’t read the books in 10 years. and only read one. the last one, in 3 hours. idk overall it was a weird conversation and i sort of thought that was the end of it. 

honestly, i’m not gonna spend a TON of time on this already too long psa going on about every interaction we had with her, every crazy thing she said. most importantly, we accepted her in, thinking she was just a little wild but us talking to her covered it. she ended up going in active over easter or spring break or something, wanted to take up another character, we told her to wait to pick her activity up. ya know, standard admin business. and then she started attacking us. telling us we didn’t care about her, about what she went through not having a computer or whatever. she started sending us anons about how her friend stole her money and we don’t care about her and we all hate her so why should she stay. it was kinda insane. again, check the google doc for all that. she ended up leaving, we got some anons about how she never joined other rps because of admins like us. just random things here and there, some anons about how dare we talk to people like we did. just random shit that really only she could come up with. but we had an rp to run, lives to get on with, tv shows to binge, idk fam. life goes on. 

honestly, we sort of forgot about this whole mess for like close to a year? that was when we started getting ims. from her. we knew bc it was the same accounts as before. she uses the same ones over and over, it’s easy to keep track of her. it’s sort of why we never felt the need to bring anything up, we always thought she was just stealing from us and we knew when it was her and when to refuse to accept the questions. this is where we enter phase two of hidden’s journey with “j” : the thief. 

this is one of our earliest encounters. before she started sending them on anon. 

(for some quick context, she would send us questions for fcs, ask if a character was open and then go around trying to poach our members for her group)

tw suicidal thoughts for this next picture 

honestly this goes on for like 10 more pictures, so instead of spamming here, the full conversation is in the google drive under the folder : a fight that almost was

she eventually goes on to call me out as the admin talking to her, i tell her again to message me off the main so that we could get back to actually admining our group. she hits me up, calls me “a cute ginny mun”, and then proceeds to ask me to help her fill out Her Own Application for ginny for her own group!! 

the tiktok video of “did a full one eightyyy” is all that is going through my head from this specific encounter. 

anyways. this is when the stealing really amped up, for not just us, but for the entire rpc. around this time, we had stupidly let her back into the group, i had wanted to keep my eye on her personally. see what she was stealing from the inside. idk i was dumb. this is also around the time the first psa about her came around. 

enter, phase three. it’s similar to phase two, but this time, “j” must tell everyone she is in fact Not A Thief™

so, during this time, it was around may of last year? while she was in the group, she started stealing more, we were catching her in the act, and we eventually had to kick her out of hidden. it’s not really a shock but ya know. gotta do what you gotta do. 

she was going by jasmine at the time. anyways. this is also before her current group @seattlehqrpg​ , when she still had @manilahq and @forgottenfriendshiphq or whatever she changed that too. she was getting a ton of “hate” over there. mainly anons telling her to stop stealing from other creators. valid. 

anyways, she would blame us for all of the stealing, that we were the true thieves. idk we were her scapegoats for a long time. i can confirm to you all now, i have never, nor have any of my admins, sent her any messages to steal fcs or anything to “attack” her. honestly we try to forget she exists but she just makes it so hard to ignore her with all of this. 

anyways, this has been our song and dance with “j” for a while now. we get an anon, we answer, she steals from us in a matter of hours. i’m sure everyone can attest to that similar situation. i mean, here’s just like a couple instances. i have hundreds in the google docs, dating back years. this behavior doesn’t change.

i mean, she has even gone as far as to steal our plot. sure, it’s not exactly original. every multifandom somehow brings all these characters to a city by magic or something. but the mention of the witch, the alternate universe city, the memories. it just all around reads plagiarism. 

so, check the google doc for more evidence i guess if you really need to! 

but, some things we’ve noticed, beyond her just stealing asks and plots and EVENTS ??? AND NOW TASKS ??? check out this post for the tasks, and this other psa for the event. because that shit is so fucked. 

she has also straight up stolen replies and claimed them as her own. my friend and fellow admin, was in her rp for a hot minute, and played pacifica northwest. (some information is crossed out for privacy) this was from us talking about the plagiarism, of her stealing from my friend while “j” was in hidden, which we both admin.

this is her post

and this is "j”’s, while she was in hidden.

i mean, same gif and everything friends. 

she constantly goes on about how she doesn’t look at other rps, how she doesn’t have time, that she’s running five other groups, but honey, we’re running those groups for you with all the stealing!! i mean, just as further proof that she is constantly looking at other groups, including hidden, to an obsessive amount. a member left her group (who then went and joined us we believe), and this was her unfollow for them. (i feel so sorry for that member to be called out like this?? how uncomfortable do you have to make your former and current members???)

and hidden’s character count that same day ??? coincidence, i think not.

listen, this isn’t meant to stir up more drama, i know it will and that’s kinda why i put this off. everyone had sort of said what needed to be said? it didn’t feel necessary to repeat the same shit we all knew. but with more of this happening, with her stealing plots, tasks and events. it felt like this was the time to strike, to get this awareness back up. she needs to stop, and if we all ban together, maybe we can stop it? i don’t know. but i have hope that this can all change if we have each other’s backs. 

this has been hiddenwashington’s side of the story, i’m sure there are still more groups out there with stories or stolen asks. and i am sorry to anyone who has had to deal with her. but just, do yourselves a favor and look out for anyone with a j alias, 21+. she/her, from pst. who also uses “RPG” a lot. 

a lot of this stuff is old, but she’s still doing this in @seattlehqrpg​​ i just grabbed these screenshots because it’s what i had on hand. but anyways. here is the link to the google drive with all of our screenshots we have complied.

if you have any questions, comments, concerns, what have you: my inbox (including anons), ims and everything are open and i am more than happy to chat!! please come talk with me about anything!!!

stay safe, and thanks for joining me on this season of To Catch a Plagiarizer. 

[myherogroundzero]

i swear im alive

so like, i just want to say a (not-so) quick apology for dropping off the face of the earth. im struggling an inexplicable amount with myself. i’ve become painfully aware of the fact that im a maladaptive daydreamer and it’s honestly become such a problem. i’ve been this way for years and i never really saw a problem with it ?

but there is a problem with it. my mom asked me to help her with dinner and to do the dishes, which is literally fine. but i was so fucking angry bro. i needed music, i needed to rock, i needed to daydream. and she was taking that away from me. i’ve found that being this way is what stimulates my inspiration for writing. it’s how i come up with scenarios and such (even tho my stories arent that great LMAO.)

i’ve tried to utilise this issue productively, i’ve tried to better myself in an art i have loved since i was young (i.e. writing.) i imagine i get better with every word i write, but i can’t live my life. i can’t paint my room until i tape it off so we dont get paint on the baseboards, but i literally cannot bring myself to do it. i’ve tried. i have sat there and i was like “you gotta do it. just do it, then you can daydream afterwards like the fuckhead you are.” but i can’t

i mean obviously i CAN, but i can’t. that makes no sense. honestly guys im just so bothered by this. it’s gotten to a point where i will cry because i can’t control it. i feel so bad that im so unkind to the people around me simply because they’re taking time from me daydreaming. it’s not fair to them, and it isnt fair to me. i’ve spent almost 17 years (thats an exaggeration, its more like 11 or 12 years but thats basically most of my life where i could think for myself) of my life dreaming of nothing more than living and having a life full of adventure that i never got out to find the adventure.

i’ve wasted years of my life barely existing in this world so i could live in another. i’ve tried quitting instagram and tumblr and twitter and all of the things that help fuel my meticulous, life-stealing dreams, but nothing works.

i’ve reached the realisation that i have no clue who i even am. so many years of me living a separate life in my head and being everything i could ever want to be that i forgot to actually discover who i am in real life.

this has become a rant and a way for me to just spill my bottled up emotions onto you guys who probably don’t necessarily care, but if you’ve read this far, thank you. i’m trying. i want to write again, but i get interested in other things like books and games and movies that i forget i also have an account for fanfiction and theres people who want me to write things.

but yeah, in short, this is my lame excuse as to why i haven’t been on. sorry if there’s anyone who enjoys my writing and didn’t have anything else to read. i love u guys, especially the ones who show so much love and support on my work. i hope i can overcome my dumb brain and get better as a writer and make things worth ur time 🥺✌️

ok im gonna shut the fuck up now. i’ll try writing more. i might turn this account into something more than just BNHA so i can share all my love for all my fandoms w u guys 😳👀

i hope you have such an amazing day today that you can’t wait to wake up tomorrow 😌✨💫

[fizzypunks]

An Ache Deeper Than This

fandom: naruto wordcount: 3.7k/oneshot rating: teen (sensuality) summary: shikamaru is feeling old and achy on the way back from a mission, and neji gives him a massage.

AO3

note: written because im stressed and just wanted fluff lol

<>

 “We’ll make a camp here for tonight,” Neji said, looking up to the sky and the setting sun. Twenty-five minutes till sundown, and two more days left till their team reached The Village Hidden in the Leaves.

 Two days till home, after over two weeks of mission. Shikamaru could have sighed in relief, but he didn’t -- though he was relieved, he felt like he’d been whittling down his stamina a lot more these days, and he didn’t want to sound too happy at the prospect of rest. He’d save his sighs and complaining for      slightly bigger things than settling down for the night.

 Hinata stopped a couple of branches behind them, and a quick glance showed that she was surveying their area. Her eyes relaxed, with a little smile shot toward Shikamaru. “No one’s following, and there’s no one flanking.”

 Shikamaru smiled back — he never had to be concerned about their surroundings, not when he was with two Hyuugas.

 Lee looked into the same sky, the same direction, and patted Neji on the back. “That is a good call, Neji! The night is swiftly on its way, and we are in a good location to set up camp! We have done a great deal of traveling!”

 Neji laughed, looking down to the grass below his branch. “Indeed, Lee. I’ll leave the tents for you.”

 “Leave it to me! It will be ready in half an hour!”

 Lee dropped to the forest floor, followed by Kiba and Akamaru. Neji and Shikamaru shared a bemused glance. Of this promise, they had no doubt it would be fulfilled, and fulfilled fast.

 ~

 When Shikamaru wants to complain about pains, aches, and other physical issues that seem to follow him around like a persistent pet, he has to remind himself to not call it a factor of old age. That just wasn’t possible. He knew it, and if he were to say it, it would make him sound more whiny than he cared to be these days.

 It’s just the way of a ninja -- who cares if he’s 21, he’s been an active shinobi since he was 12. He’s lived through war, too many S-rank missions to count, and plays an active role fulfilling academy duties such as dodging hyperactive students with weapons. He’s a seasoned shinobi, and he has the scars (and joints) to prove it.

     You’re not old, you’re a ninja.  

 That still doesn’t make the aches and tightness in his shoulder any better -- knowing the cause doesn’t prevent it from happening. Short of retiring, which he didn’t see coming any time soon,      this     was going to be his life. He was going to have to get used to it.

 Maybe he can grumble. A little bit.

 “Nara,” came the calming voice to pull him from his thoughts.

 Shikamaru looked up from the log he was backed against, eyes focusing in on the Hyuuga in front of him. The sky blended into his long, restrained hair, and the calm fire lit behind him brought a glow to his white robes. His hands were in his pockets, and from his flat expression, it wouldn’t be easy to assess his demeanor.

 Shikamaru smiled, which in turn brought one from Neji.

 “Nara? You haven’t called me that in a while.”

 “You haven’t complained in a while, either, so I figured I’d check in.”

 “You’re such a good squad leader. Thanks, captain.”

 Neji’s eyes shifted to the side, a self satisfied smile replacing the gentle one before. “Don’t call me that.”

 Shikamaru laughed, propping his arms over the back of the log. He liked this. He      missed     this. He sees Neji often enough, but by misfortunes way, they often take on different missions. This shared mission, it would seem, is a blessing. Even if it was more trouble than it was worth, but it was also an incredible peace of mind to be side-by-side with him and not just waiting to be reunited.

 That was more common than not, too.

 Neji sat down on the same log Shikamaru rested against, just to the left of him. His robes were sullied with the regular wear and tear of a mission, and due to the nature of their combatants in the land of earth, the edges of his pants were singed and blackened.

 Shikamaru reached out and rolled the material between his fingers, watching parts of it break off. “Did you consider that maybe there’s nothing to complain about?”

 Neji looked down to him, then sighed. “This mission is long, got derailed, took longer than anticipated, and no one has slept in a bed in two weeks. I’d consider that… troublesome.”

 Shikamaru chuckled, dropping the hem of his pant leg. His eyes turned toward the fire, where Lee, Kiba, and Hinata roasted veggies. “Hmm. You have a point.”

 Neji rested a hand on Shikamaru’s shoulder, and Shikamaru tried not to flinch. He thought he must have done a good job, since Neji didn’t comment on it. He just squeezed, gazing out to their friends at the far side of camp.

 “When we’re home, it’s possible we might have to take on another S-rank. Kakashi already told me that he got word of missionaries out in the Mist, and he doesn’t want to send genin or chunin.”

 Shikamaru couldn’t help it this time, he had to sigh - he      had     to, in some way, let out his frustrations, and nothing was appropriate except for the soft tufts of tension that need to be released from his body.

 This life was clearly not made with him in mind -- he could do it, but it was a pain.

 “What a drag.”

 Neji squeezed again. “Indeed.”

     Man, my shoulder hurts -- what the fuck did I do to it?  

 Kiba and Akamaru were wiped too, because Lee was animatedly talking to him and Kiba was only nodding in agreement. Hinata, with a bowl of food in hand, was more engaged in the conversation, smiling and nodding along as Lee continues his story.

 They were far enough that the two of them couldn’t hear any details, just tones, just exclamations. It was sort of heart-warming, if Shikamaru ponders on it. Walking away from a mission that took blood and sweat and tears (Lee’s, admittedly, but tears nonetheless), only to be sitting with your friends and teammates in a tranquil evening of rest.

 It’s nice, seeing everyone you love alive.

 “So, which shoulder is it?”

 Neji’s hand was still resting on him, atop his jacket, and Shikamaru was again removed from his thoughts.

 “Hmm? What?”

 Neji shot an annoyed glance downward. “Where are you hurting? And don’t tell me you’re not, you’ve been favoring your left arm and side all day.”

     Ah    ,      to think a Hyuuga wouldn’t see… that Neji wouldn’t know. Should’a figured.  

 “It’s not that bad.”

 “But it hurts?”

 Shikamaru laughed, looking up to Neji and trying to be annoyed and finding that he couldn’t. Neji could frustrate him, call him on his shit, or generally be a pain to deal with on missions, but Shikamaru couldn’t find it in himself to be annoyed. “... A little bit, I guess.”

 “Take off your jacket,” Neji said immediately, like all he needed was a reason.

 Shikamaru obliged, and he removed his flak jacked with all the care in the world. Sitting down, having a chance for his body to relax and not move, had set his muscles into a calm state that did not take kindly to being interrupted.

 The sharp pains running down his back, his scapula, and his neck were renewed. He gasped when his jacket was freed from his shoulders. “Damn it,” he sighed, setting it off to the side.

 “I thought you said it wasn’t that bad?”

 Shikamaru shook his head. “It isn’t,” he insisted, but he didn’t try to sound convincing.

 It was Neji’s turn to sigh. In a quick and quiet motion, he stood, hitching a leg around the log so that he could sit behind Shikamaru. Shikamaru sat on the ground, a long leg on either side of him.

 Shikamaru immediately tensed when he realized what Neji had in mind, and looked over his shoulder with an expression he hoped wasn’t too surprised. “      Neji    ,” he said, not quite a whisper, but through tense lips. “They’re…”

 Neji took it all in amusement. “Kiba and Hinata are nearly asleep, and there’s no force in the world that will make Lee observant enough to notice.”

 His hands came up to lay gently across Shikamaru’s shoulders, no force behind them, just intent and awaiting action. Shikamaru wanted it in his heart, his muscles begged for a massage that would bring an end to their ache, but the type of person he is has      never     made him feel relaxed in the face of public displays of affection...

 They’ve been together for three years, and everyone knows this, and he will      still     feel himself grow stiff at the thought of being open or vulnerable in public. His ears still would warm if he’s caught in the middle of a kiss…

     It’s a damn curse.  

 Neji’s hands, all soft angles and long digits, rose up the sides of his shoulder, encouraged to do so with the silence Shikamaru granted him, rather than complaints and arguments. They climbed just to the length of skin between his shoulder and his neck. He leaned down, head dipping to the right, his lips ghosting the shell of Shikamaru’s ear. “Can I let down your hair?”

 Shikamaru’s face felt warm -- too warm, too fast. He nodded, eyes forward in anticipation. It was dumb, but he’s just... never been the type to be vulnerable in public -- and      never    on a mission. But he nodded all the same, because Neji’s hands were convincing in any circumstance, and maybe this little log, far away from camp, was private enough.

 The sounds from the campfire kept steady, a gentle scene of friendly stories and muffled laughter.

 “Thank you,” Neji whispered, and he quickly did away with the band in Shikamaru’s hair. He combed through the mass, making sure to not catch in any knots so it could lay flat.

 “That’s nice,” Shikamaru sighed, surrendering to him despite their circumstance.

 Neji carded through his hair, gently and with great care. He was slow, and the feeling was like a calm shore lapped at by little waves. And when he brought his fingertips to trace long paths down his head, Shikamaru definitely didn’t mind at all.

 “Don’t stop…”

 He pushed the lengths to drape over Shikamaru’s right shoulder, and Shikamaru opened his eyes, not having remembered closing them at all. Neji began pressing the tips of his fingers into the knots in his shoulders. “How about after a massage?”

 Ah, yes. That’s what he was supposed to be doing. “Oh… yeah, yeah.”

 Neji chuckled, and the sound was like a hit to the gut. “I’m sorry I distracted you,” and before Shikamaru was able to disagree, he pressed his thumbs into tender muscles. “Now, relax.”

 “Mmm,” Shikamaru winced, thumbs grazing over inflamed muscle and painful nerves.

 “Tell me where.”

 “Right where you are is      perfect    ,” and this was the way it was, he was already sinking back into Neji’s hands, eyes fluttering shut again with each passing second.

 Neji’s hands were familiar, gentle and rough in a perfect harmony that was known only to Shikamaru. He’d never experienced a place that felt safer than within the hold of these hands, and      this    embrace.

 His shoulders fell, by inches, but in magnitude it was like the tensions of a bridge held taut on ropes too worn      finally     giving away. He didn’t even know how      bad     they felt, not until he could move them without also being in discomfort. The tenderness remained, but that, too, was lessening with every squeeze.

 “Your muscles are so tense…” and he pushed a thumb deep into his scapula, a tight roll of knots lighting up under his thumb.

 Shikamaru whimpered, head tilting in favor of his left, and tried to unscrew his eyes as the pain passed. “I know… well, I know      now    , but I didn’t realize I was this --”

 A press, and a loud      pop     between his back ribs.

 “--      hnn --    tense…”

 “You should stretch with me at home.”

 “We’ve tried that…”

 “If you try with me, I’ll make sure you don’t corner me again.”

 Shikamaru smirked, the memory bringing a spark of heat to his stomach. Ghost pains of kneeling behind Neji on his bare knees came back like a blaze, but he didn’t hate it. “Suit yourself.”

 Neji chuckled again.

 When he gets past the stupid part of his brain that insists he’s doing something he shouldn’t, and publicly doing it despite it being easily viewed, Shikamaru admits that it’s not that bad. Granted, their teammates were still a distant thought that didn’t pay them any attention, but still -- he enjoyed the fact that he was able to get away from the pain in his body.

 Neji’s hands are like home, coaxing and pulling him into comfort. He opens his eyes just a sliver, peering out from his sleepiness and tranquility. The lights are little points, blurry beads and circles.

 The ground is hard, he wants fresh clothes, and there’s a creaky forest around them, but with Neji…

     I don’t need anything else.  

 “Neji…” He whispered, leaning toward his thigh. He beckons with a finger, “C’mere.”

 Neji’s hair fell, flowing down into their space, and it was like a curtain, a place that existed between the two of them; another place so familiar, his bones would recognize it no matter what. Neji eyed him from the side, quiet, attentive and awaiting. Shikamaru raised his arm to wrap around Neji’s neck, not to tug or pull or alter in any way except to say      stay    .

 “I owe you.”

 Neji shook his head, but kept his silence with a knowing smile.

 “I do.”

 He kissed Neji’s cheek, ‘cause actions are better than words.

 Neji’s hands start to knead into the conjunction of his shoulder, still under loose restraint of Shikamaru’s arm. A shooting pain issued from each contact point-- little avalanches, little aches releasing themselves from the flesh like tumbling boulders. It hurt, but then the pain gave way to better feelings, fewer pains.

 “Your hands… are so warm,” it was like he couldn’t stop the words. His voice was hoarse and too relaxed for his own liking, since it wasn’t in his house or his bed, and those too tumbled like an avalanche.

 Neji leaned into the skin he was just kneading, lips open in a kiss that only skims the surface -- like what a breath is to a shout, a droplet to a swift river.

 But then he starts to suck, and pool blood into the spot Shikamaru knows will be covered by his jacket. It brings heat to his face as he closes his eyes and leans back into the body behind him. His legs twist, just a bit, and he doesn’t have quite enough will power to not let the tension build in him -- his hips shift, his feet doing all they can not to dig.

 Shikamaru grabs at both calves beside him, squeezing.

     “Don’t do this to me    … they’re over there…”

 Neji’s lips dance further into his shoulder, and a finger tugs his shirt down over the muscled expanse to expose more skin. “I’m watching, they aren’t looking…”

     “Hinata…    ”

 “She never uses it unless she needs to…”

 “Please… you’re gonna… make me too excited…”

 “Hmm,” he laughed, little ripples dancing on his skin. “You look nice like this though…”

 Another wet kiss, another shudder down his spine and straight to his crotch --

     “You’re a fucking menace    ,” Shikamaru hisses.

 Neji laughs and the vibration carries across his skin, and Shikamaru starts to think that this entire thing was a ploy just to mess with him. But then he retreats, slowly and with a small parting kiss to the skin now blooming with a bruise.

 His hands return to their original work, kneading away the tension. “Suit yourself.”

 The hot coil in Shikamaru’s stomach sits in wait, and the hidden breath stuck in his chest came out in a nervous exhale. His heart wasn’t racing but it still surged, and now it too was trying to reconcile returning to normal -- so annoyingly fast did it happen, already bringing him to a state of being needy and tired and yearning.

 Shikamaru rolled his head back, laying in Neji’s lap. “I fucking hate you.”

 “I’m just trying to relax you, it’s not my fault you’re so reactive.”

 They fell into a peaceful silence after a quiet hum of acknowledgment -- before so long, the deep-rooted pain in Shikamaru started to ease, soothed by the heat of Neji’s chakra as he focused on chakra points.

 The sound of silence also came from camp, where talking had slowed and the fire started to sizzle. It was in embers, and the group surrounding it was finally quieting down for a restful night.

 Watching the camp, and enjoying the sense of family that surrounded him, Shikamaru crossed his right hand across his body to rest it on Neji’s. “I wonder if this is what life is gonna look like.”

 “What do you mean?”

 “For years, we’re going to be going on missions, and we’re all going to be waiting for the rest of us to come back. I just wonder…” And he couldn’t take his eyes off the rest of them, nor rip his hand away from Neji.

 “You’re very… sentimental today,” Neji said, leaning into his ear and using his spare hand to run his fingers through his hair again. “Are you okay?”

 Shikamaru nodded, ignoring the goosebumps Neji’s breath brought to him. “Yeah, I’m good. Just feeling old.”

 Neji laughed. “I’m not going to address that since I’m older than you, but if you want my opinion -- yes, I think we’ll be like this.” And then a small kiss, pressed to his cheek. “I think there’s very little in this world that we haven’t dealt with.”

 “I guess you’re right.”

 And because Neji knows what’s at the heart of the issue, the part that’s      really     scary, his voice dropped and Shikamaru was certain he was the only one who could hear him. “And I’ll keep coming back to you, and waiting for you to come back to me.”

 Shikamaru’s grip grew stronger, whiter, like all the pain in his body suddenly relocated into his heart and he had to hold on to      something     to not get lost in it.

 “You better,” Shikamaru said, voice swallowed up in his intention. He didn’t realize how heavy this was.

 “And you’ll come back, too, right?”

 Shikamaru knows he can’t even promise it, yet he feels it in his gut. “Yes,” he responded immediately, forcefully, and his grip became stronger to emphasize.

 The shape of Neji’s breath was a smile, and then a hum. “That’s all I want to hear.”

 Shikamaru leaned into him, and couldn’t help but relish in all the ways Neji was attending to him, giving him all of his attention and assurance. The hand carding gently through his hair was grounding, just like the feeling strong thighs encasing him was comforting, and the deep familiarity of his hair and the floral scent that always clung to it...

 “And,” Neji continued, still as quiet as a whisper. “I can’t wait to get you home.”

 “Gods damn it, Neji,” Shikamaru laughed, shaking his head against the other, ignoring the stoking of the fiery heat within his stomach. “Thank you for being serious for a minute, I guess.”

 “I’m always serious.”

 “Even when you switch topics like that?”

 “Especially when I switch topics to      this    ,” and tugged his hair just a little bit, just enough.

 “Hmm, I guess you can show me,” and he lifts his hand from Neji’s to turn him, by the chin, in his direction, lining up their lips. “Since you wanna be difficult, I --”

 “HEY!”

 Shikamaru dropped his hands, dropped his eyes, dropped his very intentions with every rapid degree of heat that graced his cheeks.

 He looked toward camp in a snap of the neck, feelings stupid for his wide eyes and kick-started heart. Kiba is waving toward them, a clear grin across his face as the others behind him are shuffling to clean the fire.

 “LOVEBIRDS! WE’RE CALLING IT A NIGHT!”

     Why is he so loud?  

 Neji’s body shook with little tremors of laughter, and he knew that Shikamaru would have sounded too annoyed to answer. So he called out. “Sounds good, I’ll be on watch first!”

 Shikamaru knows what he’s doing. He does it all the time.

 Kiba flashed them both a grin, but something about it wasn’t pure and it made Shikamaru want to dig a hole and live in it permanently.

 “Sounds good!”

 “I’ll wake you in two hours.”

 “Yeah, yeah,” he said, turning his back to help put out the fire. But before he did, he shot a look to Shikamaru with a smirk. “Just keep it down, all right? Akamaru’s a light sleeper.”

 And then Shikamaru definitely wanted to be swallowed up by the ground, hitai-ate and all.

 Normally, Neji would be over there, helping, but there was little to do and what there was to be done, was very quick. Lee and Kiba relocated to their tents after their foods were put back in bags, and Hinata to her own tent after she doused the fire with dirt. Neji and Shikamaru stayed as they were, in the few minutes they took to watch their teammates, and it was almost awkward if it weren’t for their friends lack of subtlety.

 They let them have their moment, no questions asked. Shikamaru felt his heart swell again, filled with the unspoken and unconditional love he has with this family. It was a pleasant ache.

 Just a few minutes, and suddenly the dark nature was rich and comfortable and almost absolute around them. A familiar sight in the many years of camping out on missions, the consistent scenery and scents as known to him as the back of his hand. The woods were calm and quiet, and they were alone.

 “So,” Neji started, hands slowed but strengthened, intention growing from his fingertips in every movement. “Not going to bed?”

 Shikamaru relished in the darkness, in the kisses trailing down his neck yet again.

 He smiled into the soft pecks trailing down his neck, this time, and didn’t even pretend to stop them. “It’s a little too early to call it a night, don’t you think?”

 “See, you’re not getting old.”

 “I’ll show you how alive I am,” and Shikamaru kept that promise.

[nightklok]

chickles for 2? or toki for 3 if someone asked for chickles already :3

Fandom Memes [open!] (shout out to firefox for crashing and making me rewrite this like twice-so i continued to add more to this because why not)

When I started shipping them: Oh this is actually a funny story- I can’t quite remember when I started shipping them but according to AO3, I read a chickles fanfic in November 2019 (the only one i didn’t reread because im sure there were others i read too) and that was around when I began starting the show. But around that time, I SWEAR when I looked at Charles wiki, there was some line there that was along the lines of  ‘Charles and Pickles had slept together sometime before Dethklok. while pickles doesn’t remember it, charles does’ I don’t even know if it was possibly a fever dream, mixing up a fanfic as canon, or I just happened to scroll through it when someone threw the line in BUT I CONSIDERED IT CANON and I lowkey waited for that scene as I remembered it on/off and it didn’t take until April 2020 when I finally finished the show to realize that it wasn’t canon D: so thanks to fanfics and probably misreading something in November-december 2019 that’s when I shipped them :D (Also if anyone knows where I may have gotten this from pls link me)

My thoughts: I love them!! They’ve made me happy shipping them and they’re just a good and wholesome ship to me! I think it has everything I could ever want in a ship; the angsty and sad moments but also the happy ones- I don’t know how I can articulate just how much they clicked with me but they really did! They’re like the ultimate band parents,

What makes me happy about them: I think I love how they can bring something in each other that they normally wouldn’t be able to do themselves. I headcanon Pickles as someone with ADHD (and aries because hi im an aries with ADHD) and I think Charles would be able to help calm him down and keep him focused or at least stimulated when he needs to be. Being with Charles can help him be a bit controlled (Though sometimes not by much when he wants to be a tease haha). I love the idea too of Pickles being able to bring Charles to have a more exciting day or just being able to help break routine a bit. Pickles sometimes likes to do things on the spur of the night just to keep himself entertained and Charles prefers to keep things in a schedule. They would find a compromise where Charles clears out a day and Pickles just takes him somewhere random. Is it a concert? Forest? Amusement park? Half the fun’s in not knowing! But Charles enjoys that he can be a bit looser and actually get to laugh and smile and just be having the time of his life with him-

What makes me sad about them: I think Doomstar/Post-doomstar and even the events between season 2 and 3 makes me sad, it breaks my heart in two just thinking about it. Pickles...would be so fucking devastated  when Charles died, especially if we go by if they met during Snakes N’ Barrels and he may have never gotten a chance to confess his feelings (or he did for more sadness) and Post-doomstar? He probably ends up blaming Charles leaving on himself and- though depending on where we’re thinking of the possibility of the timeline of their relationship, Going Downklok may have wrecked their relationship because alternatively, Pickles may not have flirted with Abigail but probably something else caused them to break up or destroy their relationship. There was a lot of tension/build up in that episode so I guess their build up and eventual burst would be feelings having to resurface, possibly Pickles getting too far in his addictions and Charles still revealing nothing about what happened during his absence or why he came back; so then you get  the dinner scene and it was the straw that broke the camel’s back to get him to quit and then all the events unfold and Pickles just blames himself so heavily on it  oh god i need to WRITE THIS

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: I don’t think there’s anything in fanfic that annoys me when people write them- It’s more of being uncomfortable/disturbed?...there were a few fics I came across where Charles was borderline abusive/overly sadistic (and one where I wish I hadn’t read-) that left a bad taste in my mouth after reading it. I just feel like that’s way too OOC and Charles definitely isn’t the type of person to be an abusive asshole and/or would definitely know the boundaries of being sadistic in the bedroom while still making sure his partner is into it/feels safe. But i guess that kinda goes in general for any Charles/character fics- 

Things I look for in fanfic: I think them being in character, an interesting plot line, and just it being well written is all i can ask for haha-I honestly love any Chickles fanfic out there; I think the things I look for in particular are either his reactions to seeing Charles when he comes back or anything post doomstar but also implying that they met during Snakes N Barrels help

My wishlist:

I guess I’m just gonna shove in things I hope to write actually- (screaming at me to write particular fics helps motivate me so go @ it-)

A Star reader AU: this actually would be the one of the first (probs second or third) Chickles fic I had ever written as I had drafted it around ago even though I had initially planned for the Chickles to kinda be hinted at but with what I know now, would make it more prevalent. If anyone has read Blood Red Road by Moira Young you might see where I’m going but basically, there was a character who was able to read the stars and predict the future. (if you’re hoping the novel goes more into that i’m sorry-) So if we make Charles one of those people, then probably adds more depth to why he chose to work with Dethklok right? :D  Secret singer fic: I AM writing that one!! I just got sidetracked but God I’m gonna get back to it as soon as I can!! Basically for anyone else reading this, Charles and his friends put up a bet to see how difficult (or easy) it would be for Charles to become internet famous by having him post covers/original songs under an anonymous name. It becomes a chaotic mess when he gets more than he bargained for and does end up gaining some popularity, someone on the internet spreads the rumor the singer is someone famous, and a particular someone came across those songs and finds the lyrics almost a little too relatable. That fic where instead of Pickles being happy that Charles is back from the dead and they can live happily ever after, he becomes incredibly distressed and heartbroken because he ends up suffering major trauma. because seeing your bf ‘die’ all bloodied and mangled and coming back with only a scar and secrets he won’t tell you? That’s definitely years worth of therapy right there. That is like the only fic of this list even remotely close to finishing but God, definitely one of the most difficult to write- Fics where they met before/during Snakes N’ Barrels. I need to write one or two fics on that because I consider it canon. I’m sure I have mentioned drafting one or two fics like that?? Gotta look through my evernotes-

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: I’m sorry but no my mind refuses to delve further- And i mean I’ve been digging Magnus/Charles lately and we all know how that wouldn’t last either so they’re meant for each other fjkdsfjlk

My happily ever after for them: The boys defeat Salacia, Charles and Pickles reunite and kiss for the first time in such a long time. They’re finally happy together and get to officially date (or continue where they left off). Charles is able to retire as the priest as his work is completed (or he manages to get it more public considering they saved the world so most likely it’d be a recognized religion) They get married, and when Dethklok officially retires, they buy a few houses, maybe even do music projects together or Charles takes over Crystal Mountain Records actually and Pickles helps out by being one of the music producers, they adopt a cat or dog or both, and just be happy with each other :D