#life asunder / wielded apathy / fate impaled * ic

[fowleyes]

𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐃 𝐃𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 :      21 ^_^                    ( image )

                                                               --  @inlife    

𝐄𝐘𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐃𝐒 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐘 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 the gravity of their existence & vision lacks reception to anything . his eyes display nothing , yet he feels his world spinning , the ceilings collapsing , & the walls closing in on him . his breathing increases & there's a backdrop of continued metronome beeping faster & faster with every moment that tears into his psyche . 

reality creeps in like a lingering demon from his past & dammit it all , it looks like he's alive . he can't move a muscle , & he dares not even try . he has no idea how long it's been since he'd released the reanimation jutsu , nor why it is that he still draws breath . he is bitter & resentful in this moment  .  .  .  he was supposed to have met the ruin that would subdue his endless suffering . it's all for naught . it's all for naught . could he not , even in his moments' most suffering , be the martyr damned by sin's consequence ?

it's not long after he wakes that a person meets his side , the needle in his hand causing mild discomfort & the smell of sanitization overwhelms his senses . the setting of the hospital clicks in his mind . he's putting pieces together , dissecting his present with each moment's passing & he feels a cold hand touch his wrist . the sensation sends goosebumps up his arms . he flinches , once , twice , & as she speaks , begins to recognize the medical - nin as one who stood at naruto's side , always fighting for sasuke , never wavering . he's shocked for awhile ; everything is still processing .

silence permeates the tension in the air that has since blossomed into extreme discomfort & upon further analysis of the room in which he lays , he hears his younger brother speak from the corner��. in the fluctuations of their voices , he hears both hope & concern .

much has passed since he's awoken , but he's certain his strength will never return to what it once was . him & sasuke have been working to recover some semblance of a relationship since the trauma of their individual burdens , shared & also , completely their own . he sits in his apartment ( devoid of much , save for the kitchen , where he spends a bulk of his time now , developing his favorite hobby ) & his brother finds himself , along with sakura , seated politely at his dining room table . 

itachi makes his way over to join them , limping , as slippers slide against wood flooring . it's the new year , so after doing his best to clean everything in his living space , he thought he'd invite them over to share some toshikoshi soba . he's glad they came , yet cannot help but feel a pang of guilt & an emptiness within his chest at the thought of a genuine family dinner .

after finding a seat among the two , the hours grow shorter with each one's passing . they've begun opening up to each other , offering sibling - like jabs , & polite sorts of teasing . itachi is still awkward with sakura , but he does his best to make her feel included . ( he never once blamed her for saving his life , despite the resentment he feels for living ) .

laughing is hard for him , often resulting in a dry cough & a subtle , yet bearable , pain in his chest . he makes sure not to do it often , so , at times , it comes across as though he's unreceptive to playful banter , or menial jokes . 

& speaking of jokes , it takes several hours before itachi saunters to his living room , noticing , as he attempts to grab a bottle of sake , an unfamiliar jar that sits upon his lamp table , with what feels like a hand written label attached . he stretches his fingers across the inked paper , feeling for the characters without making a sound .

" いきりいんきゃ* "  it reads .

ah . so this is what's become of him . he supposes its well deserved .

though , you'd think after the slaughter of everyone you've ever loved ( with one exception ) you'd deserve far less than a holiday dinner & a douchebag jar .

he silently places ten - thousand yen within it , & offers the two a knowing smile before sliding it toward them .

he doesn't bother to guess whose idea it was .

[fowleyes]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐒𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐀𝐍 . the twisted red hue that haunts him in night's late hours -- he supposes it's simply part of life at this point . insomnia oft leaves him worn in its coming days , but in this moment , he is alert , he is awake , & he is slightly fearful . his eyes are wide as he peers at fox , lifelessness tugging at his weight . itachi is worried for him . 

‘  …  have  you  ever  seen  a  sharingan  do  what  it  did  ?  ’    he asks , & itachi has no answer . he hardly manages to pull the sight from his memory , & when he does , it still makes such little sense . the swirling of the shinobi's arm into non - existence , the splatter of blood that sprays against & behind his mask  .  .  .  he still feels the thickness of it against his flesh , against his memory . he thinks back to his old teammate & lies .

                                                    ❛    no .   ❜   

his answer is simple as he proceeds to analyze the situation . for a child whose intelligence far preceeds his age , he shames himself for not knowing such a technique . there are many questions that dance about in his mind & he can't seem to grasp an answer for any of them .

    ❛    did you do it on purpose ?   ❜   at least fox should be able to answer that one .

fowleyes​:

𝐀 𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐊𝐄 that knocks the wind from his breath is like an atmospheric vaccuum  .  .  .  it leaves him in danger’s path ( a route he now knows quite well ) . but , it’s even before he has time to react , albeit almost being too slow , that the ninja’s extemity is warped from existence & the intimacy of crimson warmth is plastered through the openings in his mask , greeting his flesh like an old craved friend .

scarlet eyes dart from one direction to the next , analyzing the warriors that still thirst for gore & taking heed of fox’s absence of consciousness . he’s hasty with the way he delivers his next strikes , each one a fatal blow , ensuring he’d not be taken by surprise once more . 

red scatters the dirt like spilled wine & matching irises fall to the man distanced by a mere few feet . itachi scuttles in his direction , falling to his knees as he awaits his awareness silently . vicious thoughts plague him in the stillness of patience , but he pays them no strength – mostly he wonders what the hell just happened . 

it’s not long after that the fox - clad ninja awakens & demands an explanation of past happenings .

                                     ❛    none remain .  ❜    his voice goes silent as he attempts to garner a conclusion of mystery from kakashi’s previous display of power . perhaps he should start with someone more obvious .

                          ❛    you lost consciousness . are you alright ?  ❜ 

‘  i’m  fine  ,  just  chakra  exhausted.  ’  normally  ,  kakashi  wouldn’t  share  weaknesses  ,  but  he  and  itachi  are  going  to  have  to  wait  a  few  hours  for  kakashi  to  be  able  to  safely  choke  down  a  chakra  pill  before  they  make  the  run  back  to  konoha.  (  and  crow  is  going  to  have  to  remain  on  alert.  kakashi  knows  he  won’t  be  able  to  move  for  another  hour  and  won’t  be  really  able  to  attack  until  then.  ).  

he  doesn’t  even  try  to  sit  up  ,  knowing  that  he  wouldn’t  be  able  to  lift  himself  off  the  ground  without  falling  back  down.  he’s  –  it’s  not  the  worse  he’s  ever  been  chakra  exhausted  ,  but  it  certainly  sucks.  (  it  has  to  be  …  whatever  happened  to  obito’s  sharingan.  it  was  a  vaguely  familiar  feeling  ;  although  ,  he  wasn’t  quite  sure  when  he  had  felt  such  sharp  pain  before  ).

he’s  not  supposed  to  receive  any  help  or  any  information  about  the  sharingan  from  the  uchiha  clan  ,  and  he  gave  his  word  when  they  allowed  him  to  keep  obito’s  sharingan.  still  ,  if  obito’s  sharingan  was  going  to  start  to  get  a  mind  of  its  own  (  even  more  than  when  obito  cries  for  kakashi  )  ,  to  the  point  where  he’s  using  dangerous  techniques  with  no  ability  to  control  it  …  ‘  …  have  you  ever  seen  a  sharingan  do  what  it  did  ?  ’

[fowleyes]

@brozumaki .            |            sc .

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐏𝐀𝐒𝐓 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 an instrument out of tune through the horrors of mind's creations as he gazes 'pon boruto's form , & the familiar echo of shuriken piercing targets dances through his memories . he sees his brother in the way the boy flings the weapons with stubborn intention  .  .  .  a blossoming mimicry of an art of his own .

                              ❛    relax for a moment .   ❜

his advice wasn't requested , nor did he suspect it was expected , & yet he cannot help but notice the tension that wears at his accuracy .

[fowleyes]

@chidoried .            |            sc .

                                          ❛    hatake kakashi .    ❜

𝐑𝐀𝐖 𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐘 words drip from his lips , like aged blood - spill at blade's corrupted base . the name is familiar on his tongue , as memories ( as cursed as they were ) flick like paper drawings through the blackness behind his eyes . he hates them , he hates them , he hates them .  SCOWL lingers 'gainst poisoned spirit , yet in this world where treachery births saviours , he'd maintain dignity in a facade of evil .

                                    ❛    so , this is where you've been .    ❜

[fowleyes]

𝐌𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑 𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐃 𝐃𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘 :     

Kakashi hated being on missions during the celebration new year. There was always more traffic, always a familiar face that he bumped into. It could be a good thing or a bad thing, depending on the context. what he had not expected, however, was to stumble upon itachi ( of all people ). his throat felt tight while he indulged in a sentimentality he rarely had the option for. he tails itachi for around half an hour... kakashi is sure he's already been noticed, but the area was crowded. it wasn't like they could have an open confrontation. he approaches his former comrade, falling into stride with him.

" Celebrating the new Year?" He forces his voice to be impossibly casual; as if he had only seen Itachi yesterday. Kakashi missed him more than he was willing to admit. he's sure he's just being foolish, but... " I know a spot we could watch the fireworks from. If you wanted."

                                                                 @xhatake

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐓 of too many people gathered all in one place  --  it reminds him of the chorus of bitter voices during those meetings . those meetings that were only the rise to the climax of his fate . at least , that's what he thought for a time ( what time he'd believed to be the rest of his life ) . right now , the haunting cacophony of too much plagues his ears , but he tries to ignore it for the sake of his supper's forgotten ingredient . 

he'd anticipated the roads may be packed on a day like today , so his plans were to venture nowhere past the steps up to his apartment's front door . he would simply make his best attempt to clean his living area , & cook something warm for him , his brother , & whoever his brother opted to bring along , if anyone . even still , he expected to spend the majority of the day alone .

as he wanders & reminisces about the streets of konoha , he feels a vague , yet looming presence about him , sensing the foot steps after each of his own is drawn . the reverberations are obvious & he would even go as far as to guess that the one following him was his former leader himself . he hasn't forgotten the sounds of familiar footfalls . he likely never will . still , he opts not to encounter the man as he proceeds on this ( for once ) innocent mission . he focuses his will into dodging the overstimulating shoves of people's shoulders & the echoing of children abound . 

finally , he feels kakashi catch up to his pace , & it's not seconds before he shatters the silence with a casual question . ' Celebrating the New Year ? '  well , yes , he supposes , & he may have chosen to say , but instead he remains silent , offering only a nod in response . 

he's offered a chance to catch up with his former comrade & he supposes it couldn't hurt to take him up on the offer . he can no longer witness the vibrancy of a firework's colors , but he can still feel the cool air & familiar caress of konoha's winds , all the while sharing a conversation ( however uncomfortable it might be ) with someone who knew him before tragedy befell his entire existence . 

                                      ❛    I'll accept your offer .   ❜ 

[fowleyes]

@yoakkemae .            |            sc .

𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐓𝐘𝐑𝐃𝐎𝐌 𝐈𝐒 𝐀 𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐆𝐔𝐄 that he would do well to find the antidote . yet , self - loathing lasts like a disease , immortal . this façade , this charade that is danced blindly betwixt blood brothers has become too much for weary legs & aching soles . he awaits the day that he will fade into nothingness , the day that he will shake hands with peace & meet the horizon of anguish's sea .

                              ❛    then kill me .   ❜

                                            you were never supposed to be this way .

[fowleyes]

@celestiae . ( rin )            |            plotted .

𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐄 𝐈𝐒 𝐀 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃 that has lost its definition , plagued by the disease of a greater good , an orchestration of a puppeteer's design . the way crimson paints his hands , strung from ties that control the fate of the people  .  .  .  he is struck with a loneliness far greater than he's ever dreamed . silent tears decorate his cheeks in a fit of tragic sincerity as feet propel him onward , branch from lonesome branch . 

he halts when he sees the smoke from a fire lit beneath the leaves & his world begins to warp . suddenly , the sights of every animal in the forest are planted unto his existence , & his bloodshot eyes go dry with unsung apathy . spiders wriggle from his nail beds & he feels the uncomfortably familiar sensation of immeasurable legs tickling up his arms  .  a genjutsu , he realizes almost instantly & breaks its hold of him with only subtle difficulty . shivers flicker down his spine & he wants to sigh with the relief of reality's onset , but remains ever - silent . suspicion possesses him like a demon , its host . eyes shift in every direction & the shinobi is targetted with activated sharingan  --  a girl with brave defenses . itachi sprints in her direction ( for only mere seconds ) until she finds a kunai at her throat .

                                              ❛    what are you after ?   ❜   

the world does not yet know of the atrocities he has committed . he would dare to commit another .

[fowleyes]

@avengin .            |            sc .

𝐌𝐔𝐑𝐃𝐄𝐑  -  𝐋𝐈𝐊𝐄 𝐀 flock of ebony amidst crimson expanse . he knows it well , like a comrade , like a best friend , like a sibling ( yet , he'd never dare to cross that path ) & reality mounts the cross of sacrifice where the past might meet its ressurection . this child stands before him , every emotion weaving through patterns of scarlet irises & itachi cannot help but see something pure , something innocent . a remnant of what once was . he sees someone anguished by the harshness of existence , a pain he knows so well , a pain he wishes he might strip from their very essence & wear atop his shoulders , as if aching for atonement .

                                 ❛    i could not bring myself to kill you .   ❜

[fowleyes]

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐅 𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐕𝐄𝐒 ( fallen from their homes , false traitors gone rogue ) crunch beneath sandaled soles . the shifting sounds from his movement were nothing so accidental , however . rather , he held no concern for whether his detection was noticed or whether it was not . still , he steels where he stands , left arm limp within his coat , brandishing silence as a weapon , if only for a moment .

                              ❛    my intentions were not to remain hidden .  ❜

❝ Oh? If you're going to keep following me, the least you can do. . .is a better job.❞ The man's tone was devoid of irritation. Curiosity lighting black irises as he stared at nothing yet fully aware of his surroundings. A Sage was always in tune with the nature around him -- the animals of the wood had stopped their moving about. From the feel of this person's chakra, they were not to be taken lightly but neither was he. The Second experiment, an Inner member and one of the top three strongest of Kara. It seemed Konohagakure had some. . .surprising shinobi. Why had he come back? It's as if. . .something tied him, his soul, to this place.

@fowleyes | sc.

[fowleyes]

@netsurai .            |            sc .

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐁𝐎𝐘 𝐁𝐄𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐇𝐈𝐌 quakes in a display of vulnerability , magnetizing itachi's fingers to the base where lies sasuke's raven fringe . his hands are like ghosts , fading from existence , escaping touch with those who doubt their presence . softness has rotted at his core & when his brother opens his eyes , in a cold sweat , shaking , itachi stands above him , immobile , unwavering : a threat to his very existence .

                                  ❛    this is your reality , sasuke .   ❜   

you can wake up now .

[fowleyes]

@hyugaes .            |            sc .

𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒 '𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐖𝐍 brews like a pot of black coffee & the sun's exposure has not yet met their skin . sweat forms at the base of his back as his legs grow heavy with lethargy & his coat grows increasingly more uncomfortable with the spreading of warmth through the air . there is a slight relief as winds blow in a way only recognizable to konoha . for a moment , it reminds him of childhood . he can still feel their blood on his hands .

                                  ❛    hyūga hinata . what are your plans ?   ❜   

the new head of the hyūga clan . he's heard rumors of her desire for reformation .

[fowleyes]

@triumphe .

𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐏𝐒 𝐍𝐎 𝐇𝐎𝐌𝐄 at the side of the hero to - be . itachi's nerves are tested with every foul word that spits from the boy's crude lips . his patience wears thin  .  .  .  he spares no time for foolishness .

               ❛    regain your control . your next word could be your last .   ❜

[fowleyes]

@kamuito .            |            sc .

𝐈𝐍𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐒𝐔𝐂𝐂𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐒 the very precedence of his existence & while he yearns to learn its origin , he can draw his own conclusions on the matter . he grows certain that the other knows all there is to know about him -- a lacking mystery like the ebon skies that drape over them like a curtain , illuminated solely by flickering lanterns ( all swarmed with insects who dare test fate ) . 

                              ❛    there's nothing to be said .    ❜

[fowleyes]

𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇 , 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇 . he spits crimson from his lungs in a faltering display of weakness . he looks at his hands , warmth dripping from his palms . what a foul sight . his chest aches & he clutches it for a moment , keeling over himself in a private show of aching pain . that is , until the presence of another makes itself known to him . 

quickly does he wipe the mess from his hands & chin beneath the insides of his coat , turning with a display of apathy to mask the quickened pace of his heart beat that comes in turn with the idea that he might not last long enough to see his plans to fruition . the aggitation of the other producing himself however unnanounced would pull at his teeth .

he's silent for a moment while he contemplates a half - lie convincing enough to feed his charade .

                        ❛    there was a target in hiding . i've already handled it .   ❜   

there is still blood at the corners of his lips .

the boss has been shuffling them all across the map, from country to country and hideout to hideout; it's almost time to put the BIG PLAN in motion, and deidara gets the impression the old guard is in a hurry to tie up any loose ends before things are set in motion. sasori hasn't said as much, but he's pretty sure they've visited several haunts and spies that aren't actually strictly akatsuki business.

which is why it's almost startling to come across itachi in a base deidara had thought otherwise abandoned. he hides his surprise beneath his cloak collar, but his one visible eye narrows in suspicion.

" what are you doing here? " / @fowleyes

[fowleyes]

𝐀 𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐀𝐔𝐍𝐓 exists in silence 'neath dark pools of troubled uncertainty . this is the truth that lies within a forced prodigy , a burdened boy . expectation is a river that swarms into estuary's intentions , greeting the ocean with daunting waves & uncovered expanse . he lives in the shadows of his presumed existence , a path untraveled , yet mapped by the very souls who proclaim their love for him . & loved , he is , so much so that jealousy might eat at the hearts of those whose accomplishments compare not to his , but he doesn't see it that way . life as life , human as human , to walk different paths , to know different answers , & to seek each one's future  .  .  .  it's a gift in & of itself . 

still , kakashi exists before him now , declaring his dire nonchalance toward a future they have yet to meet . it's interesting , itachi thinks , the way the man looks at him : a spark of hope gleaming in the darkness of troubled irises ( one tortured with a scar , only visible 'pon mask's removal ) . he claims a cowardice that itachi immediately recognizes as something false , perhaps something planted by past's roots , untouched , left to rot .

the brush of a clunky vest is felt 'gainst his chest & he ties his mask to the side of his head , not yet ready to don this soldier's apparel .

                                   ❛    i think you're braver than you say .  ❜

" I am not a courageous man, I don't have any big lasting plans. " Kakashi speaks casually, gazing heavy as he works on fastening the armor on his forearm. Kakashi was born & bred to deal in death, he had given up on the idea of shining any light into the shadows of Konoha. He was much more comfortable hiding in the darkness, where no one could see him. It wasn't like he could change anything; that much had become clear by the incessant cycle of death that plagued his life. Itachi was wise, with ideology beyond his years. Kakashi had left thoughts of a better future behind him long ago. Kakashi may have lost the will the change but Itachi still had the power to walk any path he chose.

There was still darkness in Itachi that existed inside every shinobi, but he was stronger than the weight on his shoulders. He pushes a breath through his teeth. Kakashi doesn't often like to admit to his shortcomings; they were ugly, terrible things that taunted him. Where he fell short, he often found a flicker of hope when he looked at Itachi. Kakashi mused, at times, that Itachi may make a good Hokage one day. If he survived the journey of growing up, that is. He wasn't sure why he had been entrusted with such a valuable life. His team was capable, yes, but they were kids. There were young lives in his hands now & the thought was terrifying beyond all else.

Perhaps that was why it was so hard to look at Itachi now, as they readied themselves for another mission. Any day could be the day they died; it was difficult to look to the future," I'm too cowardly to take a stand, I wanna keep my nose clean. "

@fowleyes || brave as a noun.

[fowleyes]

𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐈𝐒 𝐀 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐏𝐓 derived from his childhood , forwent , & recently re - established . there is the subtlest of smiles that pulls from thin lips , softness & patience brimming from calloused fingers are they find themselves hovering atop where he presumes is boruto's shoulder . 

                                      ❛    let's take a break for now .   ❜   

his left arm dangles loosely within his coat & he shifts uncomfortably to relieve the ever - present & dull ache from his chest .

                                         ❛    are you hungry ?   ❜   

frustration made whiskered features scrunch in displeasure. first sasuke, now this guy? they acted as if he had more potential than sarada when it came to this stuff! his blonde hair began to fuzz out, a pout beginning to form as he hastily turned his body towards the elder uchiha's direction. a shout of vexation following after, ❝ I-I'm not good at Shurriken jutsu, 'ttebasa! I'm not like Sarada! No matter how many times I try and make it curve at an insane angle, it's not gonna work! I can't do this!❞ so unconfident in his abilities, something he had in common with his mother when he was younger -- such a contrast to his father; the man who never gave up, the boy who wanted to.