#let's just call it
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Banging my fists on the walls of my enclosure Help me !
#Let's just call it#skaterwizard#I guess?#Changed my mind calling it#wizardskater#Skizard funny as hell tho#skater cookie#wizard cookie#cookie run#art tag
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Part 1
Next | In order
#:)#hi! I'm starting something new today.#I'll update the tags later#and probably also the description?#long post#this is impossible to date#let's just call it#march 2024#with a little bit of#december 2023#maybe#vs com
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‘ are you going to keep beating around the bush, 𝙘𝙧𝙮𝙗𝙖𝙗𝙮 ? ’
a confrontational ask || inspired by this || "anonymous"
A plethora of sarcastic sneers, each less mature than the last, circuit his mind as he tries to ignore both the unsavory nickname – one he thought he’d sentenced to death a long time ago – and the overt euphemism. Ordinarily, he wouldn’t bother to hold back, but they’ve been sparring for hours now and he’s physically exhausted, even if his mind still has plenty of gas in the tank. Why had he agreed to help her practice her long range combat? His foresight is legendary, ten times sharper than his hindsight, which far exceeds twenty-twenty or whatever the general standard… So why on earth had he found it agreeable to be out here, in the unmerciful, late afternoon Konoha heat, digging himself an early grave by dueling with this witch?
His blurred vision bursts back into focus as his attention flickers to her wolfish gaze, black cherry lips, and the glaze of sweat coating her chest and soaking the neckline of her tank top. As feral and frenzied as she appears, he’s certain he must look even more unhinged, his face stinging and smeared with blood from the several kunai he failed to dodge while attempting to lock onto her all-but-formless shadow. She’d certainly not held back, treating his head like a human bullseye and slinging knives at him like an angry, vengeful housewife, darting around the field faster than the brutal sun’s rays could reach her. And the result is now etched into his skin, possibly forever. He imagines he must look a bit like his father, touched by the hand of war but without so much bravado. Still, he doubts if his father has ever faced a war like Her before.
Her body trembles in an effort to thwart his control, as she grips the handle of the kunai, the blade an inch from her own throat. She’s mimicking his movements as though she were his mirror reflection, snarling at him from behind the glass like the summoned spirit of Bloody Mary, miserable and brimming with malcontent. She takes a few slow, conscious steps towards him, duplicating his own, shortening the gap between them as if in a western standoff. Upon closer proximity, he can see the utter exasperation in that cautionary stare, and he delights in the opportunity to further vex her.
“Guess I should get to the point then.” The words spawn smoother than suede; unexpected, considering his ragged appearance. He’s not usually one for puns, but he can’t help but direct her arm to tease her neck with the sharp, steely tip, his eyes gradually drifting to the trace of collarbone peeking out from beneath her wild hair. Commanding her free hand, he compels her to pull the loose strands back, tucking them gently behind her ear the way one would a cherished paramour. Still shaking with defiance, she positions the blade at the opposite side of her neck, her arm crossing in front of her and snapping back swiftly as the knife completes its cut with an elegant flair.
He relishes her momentary befuddlement as she glances down at the self-inflicted, sheared fabric of her shirt strap, her eyes returning to his with a new kind of contempt. He suppresses a laugh, reconsidering that early grave, as it might prove a place of respite for him soon. The sun would be down in little more than an hour, and then his shadow tactics would be nearly useless to him. Might as well go out with a bang.
He rolls his wrist, twisting his fingers to conduct the knife still in her hand, twirling it skillfully before slipping it beneath the one remaining strap, the cool metal brushing against her shoulder and gathering goosebumps. Pausing, he raises his eyebrows at her, savoring the beautiful condemnation reflected back at him, a humorless visage concealing the faintest hint of fear. How cute. Tugging the blade slightly, he tempts the material and, with her as his conduit, feels the tension between the two increase and threaten to split. He smirks boyishly, gloating, unable to contain his satisfaction at the delivery of this checkmate. “Shall I continue…?”
#not sure what genre this is#let's just call it#spikyisms#not so anonymous#anon asks#spikyhairedsilhouette
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Need a teen! Bruce au where he’s exactly like Justice League! Batman and Battinson in one. That mf put the fear of every god in Ra’s Al Ghul.
Everytime he’s in a room with someone over 30 “Teenagers” by My Chemical Romance plays in the background.
Despite that, in his own way, he’s as gentle as can be with his league. Give me a young Diana who’s getting spat on and ripped apart by the media in a way not one of her male teammates get.
And she’s Wonder Woman. She shouldn’t be affected by it. And she is, anyway. Bruce relates to that in an uncomfortable degree.
“When I first became Batman, weak men tried standing in my way, too. “
“And what did you do?”
“I stepped over them.”
He has a tiny Robin he occasionally has to keep on a leash.
Give me somewhat teen mom Bruce who struggles to wrangle his unruly six year old who likes flipping from rooftop to rooftop and thinks fighting Bane is a piece of cake.
“If Tati can do it, so can I!”
“Dick,” he paused, before handing him a handfull of candy. “Wonderful emotional manipulation. Good job.”
“:D”
#I LOVE HIMMMMM HES SO AWKWARD AND COOL TO ME#give me the league fangirling over him at every turn and he’s just Tired of them. has to call teen Clark who’s Perry White’s intern like.#‘Kal— please write about something other than Batman.’#‘Bruce. I cannot say no to you. Please don’t ask me to do that.’#alfred is extremely tired. also extremely in need of Bruce to stop being self sufficient.#let him take care of you daMN IT—#teen bruce wayne#bruce wayne#batman#batdad#writing#dick grayson#dc comics
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I love the idea of all the robins kinda being clones of each other with just a few differences and a concussed Bruce not being able to tell who he’s squinting at so he just says generic statements and avoids saying any names
Bruce (sitting at the breakfast table): so… how’s the weather… dick?
Jason (grinning): you do know I’m gonna hold this against you for like, the next 2 months right
Bruce: (groans into his hands)
Bruce (walking into the living room): hey have you read through the files I gave you yesterday?
Dick: (confused cause he took a day off to surprise Bruce) ?
Bruce: so?
Dick: er… no?
Bruce: Dick?? What are you doing here?
Bruce (walks into the kitchen with a fresh concussion): Jason? I thought you were on a mission with the outlaws?
Tim: (frozen through mid fridge raid, having assumed they were past Bruce calling him Jason since yk. He’s a shit brickhouse now and Tim is, well, obviously not): uh?
Bruce: *turns around and leaves*
Bruce: Oh hey Cass, when did you arrive from Babs’?
Damian: (slowly turns around in the black hoodie he’s wearing) we’re not even the same gender
Bruce: (under his breath) yeah but the same height
#batman#dc comics#dcu#batfam#dc robin#jason todd#batfamily#bruce wayne#dick grayson#nightwing#cassandra cain#batgirl#orphan#red hood#Tim Drake#red Robin#damian wayne#Robin#Bruce Wayne is a good father#but a perpetually confused one#read that tag on a fic once and haven’t forgotten it since#honestly bruce is the embodiment of your mom calling all of your siblings’ names before yours while trying to call for you#the batkids never let him live it down#they actually start calling each other by different names just to confuse him further#he draws the line when he hears dick referring to Jason as Cassandra
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"we know how to move our bodies, but i didn't know how to manage my heart, so you need help for this"
hi we need to talk more about judo gold medallist christa deguchi.
#maybe i need her#that video about her battling mental health woes in 2021... ;___; i love her#she's all over the japanese forums the past few days#and the wlw community is going feral shfgshjfk#some of them call her “the one who got away”#and “my wife who was too hot for japan judo to handle but is now thriving under canada”#and today i just saw a post that just says:#i just learnt about deguchi-sama and then i rolled over in bed and looked at my husband#and thought to myself: maybe he's not the love of my life#in love with her actually#incredible things happening ;___;#also she has the three cutest cats........... please let me raise them with you....#long post#christa deguchi#team canada#olympics#paris 2024#cats#cats of tumblr#wlw#wlw post
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Mike can’t handle Abby in the next FNAF movie..
#myart#chloesimagination#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf movie#mike schmidt#abby schmidt#fnaf 2#fnaf 2 movie#lots of lil things are coming out about the second movie#just new actors casted plus dubiously related casting calls to fnaf etc#getting a real sense of what things may come up in the next film#like Abby actually going to school#I wonder if there will be a theme at all about how Mike isn’t prepared to see Abby grow up#that in his eyes she’s kinda forever his lil baby sister#and there’s like small conflict between them over that#I think it’s sweet but please don’t let these two argue too much 🩷🩵
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Simon’s home.
Which means he’s glued to your side.
You wouldn’t have it any other way.
The two of you are in a local bookstore, the shop having caught your eye while out on a stroll together, each of you going to your respective shelves to find your preferred genres.
Simon grabs the first novel he thinks sounds interesting, quickly snatching the book by its spine so that he can cross the few steps back to your side.
His eyebrows furrow when he notices how closely you’re holding a book up to your face, your own eyes squinting at the back cover.
“Havin’ trouble there, love?” He asks as he approaches.
“Can’t believe I let myself run out of contact lenses.” You reply, trying your best to decipher the blur of black ink on the pages.
“Could’ve worn your glasses.” He retorts, something he’d already suggested more than once since you ran out of your contacts and had to order new ones.
“You know I only like wearing them at home.”
“But you’re so cute in ‘em.”
“Yeah well, you’re the only one who thinks so.” You mumble under your breath, though Simon hears it of course, the crease in his brow deepening.
“Wha’s that supposed to mean?” He gruffs out.
“I just got teased a bit in school was all Si, typical kid stuff. Just stuck with me I guess, but it’s fine, I have my contact lenses.” You explain to him.
Simon considers your words for a moment, the gears evidently turning in his head, muscular arms crossed over his large chest.
“And do we know where these fuckin’ tossers are at now?”
“Oh my god Simon, don’t-”
“Have we got any names to work with?”
“That is not-”
“Any addresses?”
“You are not about to-”
“Pictures?”
“I was like ten years old-”
“S’alright lovie, we’ll dig up your yearbooks when we get home.” He simply says, plucking your book from your hands and heading towards the register to pay.
#this guy doesn’t tolerate disrespect towards you#even if it was decades ago#won’t let that that kind of slander towards you be tolerated#you literally just got called four eyes#but your man is out for blood now#call of duty#call of duty fanfic#call of duty fic#simon riley#simon ghost riley#cod fanfic#ghost x reader#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#ghost x you#cod simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley x reader#ghost fanfic#call of duty ghost#ghost cod#ghost#cod simon riley#simon fluff#simon ghost riley x you
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The Allegiance of the Ascended Vampire and the New God of Magic
#bloodweave#baldur's gate 3#bg3#gale x astarion#astarion x gale#gale dekarios#astarion ancunin#yes this is about astarion helping gale defeat mystra and take her place with the crown in exchange for gale helping him with the ritual#the ‘they can make each other worse’ part of their relationship turned to the max#I enjoy them being reluctantly soft for each other more but from time to time I just think about how powerful they could get together#toxic evil boyfriends. take love and twist it up until it’s unrecognisable#I like to think that astarion approached gale with that offer after realising no one else in camp is gonna help him#and that he can use gales own hunger for power which backfired when astarion actually became emotionally invested in gale#and after gale kept his word despite everyone’s concerns astarion changed his plan from not fullfilling his end of the bargain to actually#helping gale kill mystra (mostly so that gale could belong to him and him alone. and letting him take the place as a god bc having a god#at you beck and call is definitely appealing. especially one as eager to please as gale)#anyway what I want to say with this is please please please let me kill mystra i don’t even care if the weave gets destroyed again
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There’s something so fun about casual inspection with subs who are needy all the time.
Like walking up to them and asking if you can take a quick peak and immediately seeing them go red. Pulling the waistband of their underwear away from their skin and peaking in, seeing aroused parts all needy and desperate, clearly turned on long before I even spoke to them, seeing how flustered and embarrassed they get. Getting permission to reach in and feel how hard or wet or desperate they are, licking my hand afterwards to taste how much they were thinking of me. Asking if I can feel their chest and having my thumbs find hard nipples, desperate to be tweaked and pinched. Getting to hear desperate whines, wanting me to touch them more so so badly, but I just walk away, leaving them even more desperate than before.
I’d love to repeat the cycle over and over few hours and see just how worked up I can get them before I relieve them.
#call me inspector gadget the way I be inspecting it#and by it#let’s just say#your peanits#I’m stoned I’m sorry#t4t ns/fw#ftm t4t#t4t#t4t mlm#t4t nsft#ftm nsft#ftm daddy#ftm dom#t4t puppy#ftm ns/fw#t4t kink#t4t dom#ftm switch#fat ftm#ftm bear
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I just had a DPxDC crossover idea that I thought was funny.
What if every time John Constantine sold his soul he was basically agreeing to being “adopted” by the entity he was selling his soul to.
He thinks all of the entities he sold his soul to are leaving him alone because they’re too busy fighting/have a truce to not fight as long as none of them claim his soul, meanwhile he’s got like a dozen or so ghost/demon parents ready to go to court to fight for custody when he finally dies.
Danny, having been taken in as a ward by an older ghost since he technically counts as a baby ghost until he’s 100 or something, meets Constantine for the first time and is like: “Why are you 1/15th my brother?”
Bonus points if Danny is technically the big brother in ghost terms because he’s been a ghost the longest. Sure Constantine may be a little liminal but that doesn’t count he doesn’t even have a death day yet.
Like:
Danny (Certified little shit): “Baby brother why do you never come to dinner? :(”
Constantine, too sober for this: “The fuck did you just call me?”
Constantine vehemently denies any relation but they bicker like siblings.
#dc x dp#crack#john constantine#danny phantom#some ghost lore I just made up for fun cause I thought it was funny#John Constantine has a storm coming and he doesn’t even know#he’s got like 15 ghostly parents (and counting)#1/15th the same way someone with one different parent is your half brother#AU I guess?#let’s just call it#Custody battle for the ages AU
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your neighbor johnny is an avid reader…
soap request for @ceilidho <3
and a little bonus
#you can request a sketch like this on my buymeacoffee page if you want… just letting you know……#illustration#art#artist#digital#artists on tumblr#sketch#fanart#painting#digital art#drawing#cod x reader#cod mwii#soap cod#cod mw3#cod modern warfare#cod#cod mw2#cod fanart#soap call of duty#john soap mactavish#johnny soap mactavish#sugaredquillink#soap x reader#soap mactavish
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okay listen. i know there's already one video about The Fucking Creep out there. but i NEED to share one of my favourite Creep Moments.
#buckshot roulette#hollowtones#kuueater#shinigamieater#spark talks about nothing of relevance#now that's what I call shitposting#stream is kuu's VOD of it on youtube (tumblr hates links). go watch The Creep in action#dollip daze#dollip#lynn#<- i would tag these two properly but i can't find channel sources. wailing crying etc#but this will find it's audience. i believe.#we NEED creep to be canon lore in buckshot. just like in the back.#people would rather face dealer than creep so dealer just lets them chill in the basement 👍
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I know I’ve said it before but I will never get over the mom-ification of Robin in One Piece by the fandom because she is NOT the mom friend!!! She’s just the oldest woman in the crew she does not take responsibility over anyone she does not pack lunches she does not keep people from doing stupid stuff she encourages the stupid stuff! She is doing the stupid stuff! If anyone is the mom friend it’s SANJI that man might as well be buttoning the crews coats before they leave.
#one piece robin#nico robin#sanji#one piece#it kills me#let that woman LIVEEEE#franky and robin are not mom and dad coded#franky is weird uncle coded at best#more like#your dads weird best friend who you call an uncle even though he’s not related he just hangs out around the house all the time
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7/3: pov u r nanami kento pleased that i managed to pull smth together in time for your bday
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#nanami kento#nanami#fanart#jjk fanart#i ws like I Need To Get This Done Today I Should Not Fully Render It#and then i said bet and did anyway#with 2 hours to spare !!!!!!#thats what we in this house call Winning#hbd nanami please forgive me fr spending most of it drawing gojo.......im so sorry i didnt know ill be better ill do better...#tiny smiling nanami u mean so much to me....#i did smth a little bit different with the shape of his nose also and let me just say i am Down On One Knee#hate to simp over a blond man but
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clawing at the door
ghoap x reader. jealousy. bisexual soap. bisexual ghost. emotionally constipated ghost. manipulative soap. ghost likes em thick. lightly explicit. MDNI. ao3
When Ghost first sees you and Soap together, his jealousy is hard to parse. He doesn't quite understand what he's feeling.
On the one hand, Occam's Razor. Simple explanations usually prove the truest. Soap is his boy, has been since Las Almas, and you are an interloper in their hard-won dynamic. Ghost does not absorb others into his life lightly, even less so then he allows them to strongarm themselves beneath the mask. He doesn't particularly like people, isn't really fond of their tendency toward abject mortality.
Soap's strong arms are a rare exception. And Ghost has nearly died too many times not to admire a nice round ass when he sees one—the kind that glistens and quivers beneath the weak spray of a communal shower. Some part of him has always kind of supposed the sergeant had been showing off specifically for him, too, when he dropped trousers and moaned like a whore when the hot water started flowing.
The boy certainly dogs his steps like that's the case.
Then, you: showing up on base one day, Soap's hand spread wide and possessive on the small of your back. Jewel-bright eyes following your every move. Blush high and feverish on his boy's cheekbones every time you throw half a smile his way.
So it's envy. So it's a crush, unrequited.
Simple problem, simple solution. Getting over by getting under and all that. There are apps for every heartache, and plenty of hard-bodied gym rats out there tripping over themselves to bottom for a brute like him, who can actually throw them around.
Not two minutes after making his profile (military, six-five, top), likely candidates start filing themselves into his inbox. Some part of his ego is gratified, at least. The influx of taint pics certainly confirms for him that his vanity, in fact, is justified, even if the last thing he wants to see is some random stranger's asshole.
He messages a jacked brunette with brown eyes and dimples, who led instead with a comparatively tame "hey big guy," and lets him pick the bar where they'll meet up.
And it's...fine.
The guy is fine. Equally as attractive in person as on camera, with curly hair and short stubble. He's there before Ghost, and directs an easygoing smile at him when he drops onto a stool at the bar beside him.
He doesn't even question the mask, though his eyes linger on it, half-lidded, the kind of way that suggests he's figuring something out about himself that he hadn't considered before. Not the first time it's happened for Ghost.
The problem with fine is that Ghost can't work up even much of a chub talking to him. The guy has a nasally voice and a friendly attitude that makes Ghost's teeth go numb from the sweetness. When they sequester in the dingy pub bathroom, the guy goes to his knees like an angel, and Ghost's cock actually softens more, thoroughly bored already with the notion of this random guy’s mouth on it.
The problem is, Soap would bust Ghost's balls for this.
Sure, Ghost could get him on his knees. Soap is a good boy, he'll take an order if he's given one. But he's also a fucking brat, and the moment Ghost pulled his cock out Soap would immediately start complaining about it.
Too big, too ugly, not hard enough, and when was the last time Ghost washed that fucking thing? How romantic, LT, making him suck Ghost off in a pub bathroom, hasn't he ever heard of good old-fashioned wooing?
He'd complain, Ghost knows, because he'd want, more than anything, for Ghost to just cut through the bullshit and shove straight down his throat. He'd run his mouth because the only thing he wants Ghost to do is shut him the fuck up, for once, and make him actually work for the praise they both know he's so desperate for.
And Ghost would give it. If Soap earned it. The fight isn't about winning.
This guy isn't putting up a fight. He tries nicely, licks all over the limp-hanging head and pale glans, but Ghost ends up making some excuse—Dad has cancer, Mom died, the usual—and leaving him there still on his knees.
He deletes the apps. He can invest in a fleshlight, and find some porn star another with enough of a resemblance to be functional.
Less of a hassle for everyone involved.
Problem solved.
And then he encounters you again.
You're walking out of the supermarket one night, with two huge bags over your shoulders, digging through your purse out in front of you. He has to stop you with one hand on your shoulder to keep you from running into him.
The evening is warm; your shirt is a thin camisole with little elastic straps. His palm meets your bare skin, and finds it soft and dewy with a little sweat.
You look up, startled, blinking as if caught in a bright light.
"Oh," you say, "Ghost, hello!"
"Bird," he grunts, wondering why he's surprised that you recognize him.
He pulls his hand away, and still feels the imprint of your body heat in its grooves.
"Sorry, I should have been looking," you say, smiling. It's a friendly expression, open and innocent—a daisy's petals spread on a clear day. "Johnny's making beef wellington tonight when he's off duty, so I went and got everything."
Ghost frowns. What kind of boyfriend lets his girl do so much heavy lifting?
He helps you carry the bags to your car. He's jealous, not an asshole. You thank him with a breezy laugh when he closes the hatchback—
"I'm sure Johnny wouldn't mind if you stopped by for dinner," you say, folding your arms across your ribcage. It presses your tits together as you cup your elbows in your hands, pronouncing the line of your cleavage with an uncomfortable eloquence.
"Busy," Ghost says immediately, staring very hard into your eyes. "Thanks."
You shrug, unperturbed. "Anytime. Good night!"
He stands in the carpark for a full five minutes after you drive away. He thinks he can feel his own heartbeat throbbing through the palm he touched you with.
Well, then.
Bereft of any opportunity to get to know you—as if it would even be appropriate—Ghost stalks social media until he finds you through Soap's Instagram. Your account is private, so he sends a follow request, expectations very low that you'd allow someone with a blank sky for a profile picture and only one post on their feed to follow you, "sghostriley" notwithstanding.
But—you do. And suddenly he has a decade of material to peruse, beginning with your last year of secondary school and leading all the way up to present, the most recent photo one of you and Soap at the top of some mountain, grinning at the camera in your hiking gear.
You don't post very many pictures of yourself, he finds. Instead you document interesting food you eat or make, crafts you're working on, nice scenery you caption with variations of "saw this on my walk today :)". It's all very domestic, sweet in a way without being saccharine.
Soft, really. Totally separated from the hard edges of the world he and Soap routinely throw themselves along.
And yet, honest in a way that makes your version of the world feel more like the real one, and his and Soap’s the nightmare.
Ghost hasn't been with a girl—let alone been interested in one—in years. It isn't that the attraction had ever died, exactly. Rather, it simply became so complex, so twisted in on itself and trapped beneath years of grown-over scar tissue, that he'd made an unconscious decision never to confront it. He ignored Price’s stories about his wife’s antics at home, Gaz’s perennial heartbreak after strings of failed dates—
Soap’s lurid bragging about the women he’s taken home from various pubs.
(Were you one of those pub girls?)
So, here it is now, confronting him instead. Reminding him, in a pretty camisole, just how very much it exists.
In the carpark, there’d been a bead of sweat slipping down your neck as you’d waved him goodbye. He finds himself wondering how long it would’ve taken to slide all the way down to the slope of your breast, if he didn’t catch it with his tongue first.
He continues through your Instagram. The majority of your selfies show up, he guesses, after the beginning of your relationship with Soap.
Earlier pictures of you make your discomfort obvious. You don't like the way you look, and it shows in the tension on your face when confronted with a camera lens. But later on, you gain confidence. Your expressions are softer as you show off a new haircut or glasses.
And when the first picture of you with Soap shows up, it's like seeing someone glowing from the inside.
Your head is tucked into the juncture of his shoulder and neck. The smile on your face is soft, small and lovely in how little you're clearly thinking about it.
You're happy.
It floors him. A happy girl, settled into the embrace of a man who’s made her feel that way.
Piece of work, he is. Could ogle another man's ass without shame, but present him with that man’s girl and suddenly it upends his entire sense of self.
Some old cunt psychiatrist would have a field day analyzing him.
Ghost skips the apps and, following in Soap’s footsteps, heads back to the pubs.
It’s worse.
Not that he doesn’t have options sidling up to him, that is. It seems like all he has to do is sit at the bar and wait, and women circle their way into his orbit, not really talking to him but letting him know, simply by hovering, that they’d love for him to talk to them. Batting their lashes, laughing near him seemingly at nothing.
Up to him to make the first move then. It seems to him like the rules haven't changed over his long absence from the dating pool.
Therein lay the snag—Ghost doesn't know how to talk to women. Not that way, the way one says without saying it that he'd like to take her home and bend her over the back of his couch. Say that to a man at the right bar and that was his evening sorted, but Ghost has a feeling that won't play as well among people with cat-shaped brass knuckles on their keychains.
He's not much of a talker, period. Soap yaps enough to fill in his side of the conversation whenever they're in the field. And you...well, he doesn't know about you. Ghost has the uncomfortable feeling that he'd try for you, and fail miserably.
The bartender slides a drink in front of him, distracting him from his agonizing. When Ghost gives him a questioning look, he nods in the direction of a table behind him.
One of the barflies has made the first move.
She winks at him when he raises the glass at her. She’s pretty—her dark makeup makes her eyes look angular and mysterious, and her red dress is tight, thin, and low-cut. Her exposed chest shimmers, as if she dusted some sort of powder across her collarbones before making her way here.
Sparkly and colorful, like a lure on a line. Ready to hook something and pull it in.
(Your camisole had been threadbare and lined with cheap, fraying lace. A favorite of yours, probably, something you wore when you wanted to be comfortable, and didn’t care who thought what about it.)
Ghost notices other men are eyeing the woman, and a couple of them send nasty glares his way. That is, they do before promptly averting their gazes once they see what he looks like.
He can have this, then, if he wants it. He just has to reach out and take it.
He feels your warmth in the palm of his hand again. The breeze of your laugh brushes his cheek with a soft touch.
He sends the woman one of her own drink, drops forty quid on the bar, and leaves without looking back.
Another dinner invite comes his way, this time courtesy of Soap himself.
“She told me she met you at the store,” Soap says, one afternoon when they’re in the changing room. “Really nice of you to help her out, LT.”
“You weren’t there to do it,” Ghost grumbles. Soap has been prancing around shirtless for fifteen minutes, faffing about while Ghost waits for him to leave so he can adjust his erection.
“I didn’t tell her to get everything!” the sergeant protests. “She just went and did it herself.” Then Soap’s eyes go all dreamy and stupid. “She’s grand, isn’t she.”
Ghost grumbles again, something noncommittal.
“Anyway, dinner’s at seven, and I’ll send you the address,” says Soap, pulling a thin t-shirt over his head. Ghosts watches him yank the hem down over his pecs, covering the toned plane of his abs.
Soap winks at him. “See you there, Ghost.”
Ghost grunts.
Soap does, in fact, see him there.
He goes out of resignation. Or maybe with some notion that seeing Soap and you together again will finally vanquish whatever sits on his chest so heavily whenever he thinks of the two of you.
Soap’s the one to answer the door. “There he is, the braw wee bastard!”
“Soap.”
From the looks of it, it’s your flat. It’s nicely decorated without being too over-designed, something warm and comfortable and welcoming. When Ghost steps inside, he’s hit immediately with the smell of seared pancetta and garlic.
The sergeant leads him through the flat. Ghost has a bottle of wine under one arm, having remembered at the last minute he should probably bring something along. You’re in the kitchen, stirring a pot on the stove.
“Hi, Ghost!” you chirp when you look over your shoulder. “Ooh, good, that’s drinks settled. Hope you like bolognese. It’s all I know how to make.”
“S’fine,” Ghost says, which he would say even if bolognese made him violently ill.
“Ach, you can make more than that,” Soap says, retrieving three long-stemmed glasses from a cabinet. “Pour a nice glass of water.”
You snatch the dish towel hanging from the oven handle and give it a snap in the general direction of Soap’s ass. He laughs and dances out of the way.
“There’s a bottle opener in the island drawer, Ghost,” you say cheerfully. You're pretty tonight, in a loose t-shirt and soft-looking joggers. Casual, like you don't have a guest over at all.
Like it's just a night in with your boyfriend.
Ghost pops the cork as Soap sets the glasses down. After he pours, the sergeant delivers a glass to his girlfriend, and there’s a brief moment of quiet as everyone sips and the sauce on the stove bubbles.
It’s all so nice and normal as to make Ghost’s hackles raise just in anticipation, although he knows there’s no reason for it. Truthfully, he almost hadn’t come. The thought of you and Soap, and Soap and you, in the same room, together, a unit, had made his stomach clench up so tight that he though he might not be able to get any food down.
But some part of him needed to come, and see this. Test out Pavlov’s theory, to see if enough negative reinforcement could break him of this borderline manic fixation. If he could associate Soap and you with romantic nausea, and nothing more, maybe he could finally stop jerking off every night to no satisfaction.
Because he had, in fact, found a porn star who looked like Soap. More tattoos, and a buzz cut rather than a mohawk, but Ghost couldn’t be picky.
The real shock had been to find that this proxy often partnered with a girl who looked enough like you to be uncanny. Too skinny, definitely, but in the one video Ghost had watched of them together, he could have sworn, as the lookalike reamed her from behind—
That it was you looking at him over your shoulder.
Looking at Soap. Or, looking at Ghost, behind him.
At that moment in the playback Ghost had come so hard, cock blazing red and raw in his hand, that the notion had liquified a little. So he couldn’t be sure what the thought had originally meant.
He hadn’t been brave enough to watch another.
“This isn’t bad,” Soap says after tasting the wine. “Nothin’ on a good whisky, mind.”
“Don’t neg your lieutenant, Johnny,” you say. “This is good, Ghost, thank you.”
Hearing Johnny fall from your lips so casually threads something uncomfortable between Ghost’s intestines. Uncomfortable, because he likes it.
Had Soap told you to call him that? Or had you decided on it all on your own? Did Soap think of Ghost whenever you said his name? Did he think of you whenever Ghost did?
“Simon’s fine,” he replies.
It escapes him before he even thinks about it. The same way he’d taken his mask off in Las Almas and looked directly at Soap, wondering in some hidden part of himself if the sergeant was impressed.
“That’s a nice name,” you say, swirling the wine in your glass. You take another sip, closing your eyes to savor it, and then, tilting your head like a little bird in thought, you pour a stream of it from the glass into your pasta sauce.
“Suits him, aye?” Soap says, side-eyeing Ghost with amusement. “Right posh name he’s got for a big scary bugger. Hidden depths, him.”
“Yeah, unlike you,” you snark, stirring.
Soap slaps a big hand over his heart. “Ach, lass, you wound me always.”
“Someone has to keep you humble,” you say, grinning. There’s a charming twinkle in your eyes.
“You gonna let ‘er get away with that, sergeant?”
He surprises himself by saying it. But something in the way you and Soap bicker—absent of the usual sugary drivel, as if the two of you have skipped over the honeymoon phase and stuck the landing right into stable commitment—invites him in.
It's magnetic, almost. It seizes the spinning needle in his brain, draws it to a standstill. Evens out the landscape, so he knows where he can go.
“You’re absolutely right, LT,” says Soap, who smacks his lips, sets his wineglass aside, and bum-rushes you.
You shriek as he captures you in both arms, lifting you off the floor and whirling you around—both the spoon in one hand and the glass in the other fling drops of red and white absolutely everywhere. And then you’re giggling as Soap wedges his face between your neck and shoulder and shakes his head like a dog, probably biting down.
Soap growls; a big smile takes over your face, eyes squeezed shut as you laugh breathlessly. The sergeant’s broad, brown forearms have yours pinned up against your chest, pressing your breasts together.
“Not fair, Ghost!” you exclaim as Soap’s growling noises turn into obnoxiously loud kisses. “No pulling rank in my house!”
“Two against one, hen, you’re outnumbered,” Soap counters. “What should we do with this one, eh, LT?”
“See if I ever cook for you two again, is what!” you protest, still grinning with delight. You kick your legs to no effect.
Soap, also grinning, slots his face back into your neck. You giggle again, complaining that it tickles.
Some incomplete circuit finally connects.
Order given. Girlfriend “punished.”
Soap making you laugh because Ghost told him to.
Not one. Not the other. Both.
“Think we can let ‘er off the hook this time,” he says, feeling dazed.
The pictures on your Instagram, with you and Soap together. The both of you, smiling together, wrapped around each other, standing at the top of a mountain and grinning what the two of you get to share.
Soap's hand spread on your back.
“Aye, sir,” Soap says, setting you down. You’re still laughing a little as you go to check the sauce, and Soap finds a towel to clean up the mess he made. Ghost reels in the meanwhile.
There’s an imprint of Soap’s teeth on your neck.
They wouldn’t be there if Ghost hadn’t sicced Soap on you.
He’s still reeling as you begin plating dinner, and Soap sets out the silverware. When everyone sits down to eat, the sergeant tops up everyone’s drinks.
“I hope you like it,” you say to Ghost, setting his plate in front of him. There's a shyness to you, a verity to your concern for his opinion.
“Oh, he will,” Soap says.
He trails the tips of his fingers along the back of your arm as he directs that jewel-blue gaze at Ghost. It's sharper than Ghost has ever noticed before—
“The LT has good taste. Don’t you, Ghost?”
And with his other hand, he raises his glass to the knowing smirk on his lips.
a/n: I can't use arse, I know it would be more accurate but I just can't I'm sorry
#this is giving sirius c by ceilidho just slightly so lets call it a bit of an homage (hi ceil love you)#ghost x reader#ghost x soap#soap x ghost#ghost x you#soap x reader#soap x you#ghoap x reader#ghostsoap#soapghost#ghoap#ghost x soap x reader#soap x ghost x reader#ghostsoap x reader#soapghost x reader#mwritesghost#mwritessoap#madi writes#genuinely believe that of the two of them soap is far more likely to date someone long term#ghost is just too...ghost
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