#let’s hope i keep it for more than a week 🤞

[kitkat13001]

⋆˚ 𝜗𝜚˚⋆𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚎𝚜

>> tomura shigaraki x reader

>> comfort, this is entirely self indulgent, i have nothing to say. tomu calls reader “dollface” and “honey”, probably very out of character tomura but idgaf im going thru it and i needed him to comfort me (hope it comforts you too <3) // (dividers by @/anitalenia)

you’re mid-breakdown when tomura comes knocking at your window. 

you jump at the rap of his knuckles against the glass, your skin prickling and hair standing on end as you wipe your face. you pray your cheeks aren’t too blotchy, your eyes aren’t too red, thankful for the dimness of your apartment illuminated only by fairy lights and decorative lamp. 

“hey,” you say, opening the window and stepping back to let him clamber through. you try to keep your voice steady, but it’s futile. tomura’s nothing if not observant. 

“what’s wrong, dollface?” 

the way he’s frowning at you tugs at your heart and you feel the tears well up in your eyes again. he takes your face in gentle hands (sans pinky, of course) and it’s too much—you fully burst into tears. 

he shushes you softly, pulling you in close. his arms are tight, secure around your body. he may be a villain, but you’ve never felt more safe than when you’re wrapped up in his embrace. 

it takes a while for you to calm down. you’re gulping for air through the sobs, approaching hysteria, but the shame bubbling up in your stomach over the emotions is calmed by tomura’s quiet whispers in your ear. 

you don’t know how long you stay wrapped up in his arms, until you’ve cried yourself out. 

“sorry,” you sniffle as you pull away, wiping furiously at your face once you regain your bearings. “you don’t want to hear about my stupid problems.”

“actually, i kinda do,” he admits, taking your hands to pull you closer. “they’re a lot more digestible than��my problems, probably. who knows, maybe i can even help you.”

“thanks, tomu. but i don’t think these are problems you can just dust and move on from.”

“hm. even if that is true, i’m sure talking about will help at least a little, huh?”

he tilts your chin up with his finger, unusually soft look in his eyes.

“so what’s the matter, honey?”

it all comes out. every little thing that’s been poking you between the ribs for as long as you can remember the last couple days, weeks, months. that one time you said that thing in middle school, last week when you tripped and dropped your favorite drink, how it’s been a minute since you called your mother, the way you’re hungry and nothing sounds good, how it seems like the world is going to shit.  

it’s kind of ridiculous to hear it all out loud, but tomura was right. it’s like a weight off your chest just to say it, to be able to breathe again. 

you’re flushed and breathless once it’s all out. you’re sitting on the couch now, your hands in tomura’s. you’re not quite sure when you got there. 

your shoulders sag with the relief of it all, body caving against his. 

“you feel better?” he asks, giving you a gentle nudge. 

“a little,” you admit, allowing yourself to lean back until you’re laying in his lap. your eyes flutter shut with the feeling of his fingers softly twirling a strand of your hair. 

“just…get some rest now, okay? ‘m not going anywhere.”

as promised, completely self indulgent coping fic :) it’s been a day. hiding under the covers from the horrors of the world. get up again tmr and do it all again bc life moves onnnn 🫶🤞 stay safe and don’t lose hope. you are loved!

- 𝚔𝚒𝚝𝚝𝚢 !

[svnoohe4rts]

i’ve noticed i change themes like once a week … i get bored of ‘em so quickly :’)

[buckyshoneybunny]

The White Wolf (Part 1)

Wolf/Alpha!Bucky + Wildlifephotographer!curvy!reader  

W.C.- 2111 

Summary- Upon exploring the mysterious forest, you come across something you thought only existed in books. 

Warnings- None really. 

A/N- After a lot of contemplating I decided to turn this into a series. Unfortunately, I won’t be able to get another part out until the end of next week, hopefully 🤞. I haven’t decided how many parts yet tho. Anyway, thank you so much for the response on my last post, I could literally cry. I’m going to try and work on doing a masterlist, if anyone has any requests or story ideas I’d gladly take them. I hope you enjoy! Will be a slow burn.

Part 2 , Part 3, Part 4, Part 5 Masterlist Series Masterlist

They say, that if anyone could marry an animal, that you’d be the first person to do it. That’s the only way to describe your love for animals. You loved animals with everything in you, you loved volunteering at animal hospitals and shelters, helping injured animals, but most of all, you loved capturing the beauty of animals with nature. Not necessarily studying them, but observing. Watching wildlife, and capturing the beauty of nature paired with the animals you loved, that was what you lived for. 

Which is how you ended up here. New York City seemed to have lost its touch with nature and the animals around, so you decided to adventure out in the few forests they have left to capture the beautiful world of nature and prove to everyone that it’s worth salvaging what’s left. There was one forest in particular that caught your attention, thick trees with no way to get through but the path that led through them, the morning dew that settled over the trees, it screamed mysterious and begged to be explored.  

When you told some of the locals your plan, they warned you not to go there, said dangerous creature lurked in that forest. They said that lots of tourist would go walking there, but few returned. That only fueled your determination to explore the mysterious forest.  

So, bright and early Saturday morning you packed up your camera and some supplies, threw on a pair of blue jeans and a white tank top, a winter coat over top that to strive off the cold fall air. Shoved on your combat boots and grabbed a knife your dad gave you for protection and headed out the door.  

You were a little bummed when, a mile in, nothing had changed, thick trees and brush surrounded you. But you keep going, determined to find something. Your determination paid off. 

About another half a mile, give or take, you came across the most beautiful scene you had ever seen. It was a clearing in the trees, the land was flat with a big gorgeous clear blue lake. The early morning sun shone through the trees, creating a peaceful atmosphere. The soft, green grass covered in a layer of moister, flowers littered throughout the field. But what caught your attention was the somewhat big, beautifully white wolf lent over lapping at the sparkling water.  

I thought all wolves were extirpated from New York? You quickly and quietly hide behind a tree and whipped out your camera. You snap a couple of pictures of the wolf, you put the camera away and look for a way around the field, not wanting to alert the wolf of your presence. As you back away from the tree, you step on a twig, the sound reverberates through the forest. 

The wolf’s head snaps up, gaze locking on your figure. You freeze in fear and captivity from its sparkling steel blue eyes. The wolf slowly stands up, revealing he’s bigger than what you first thought. He sniffs the air and growls. 

Now, throughout your life, your father always told you to remain still and calm when presented in a situation like this. He said animals can sense fear, chances are though that they’re more afraid of you. Don’t let them sense you’re afraid, if they can sense you aren’t a threat they’ll most likely leave and you can get the hell out of there. When have you ever listened to his advice? That’s the only explanation as to why you ran. 

You spin around and take off, willing your feet to run faster once you hear his howl and rustling behind you. Logistically you knew you didn’t stand a chance out running a wolf, but you hoped to god he’d lose interest quickly and leave you to run away in fear. You’d never like hurting animals but when the sounds of heavy paws hitting the ground got closer you grabbed the knife that was strapped to your side. 

The wolf quickly catches up and knocks you to the ground, growling. Before he can rip your head off, you cut down the side of his back leg, not to kill him but to get him to back off. The wolf yelps and scurries off of you. You take off running again but trip over a root, you fall to the ground, hitting your head on another root, knocking yourself out. 

When you come too, you’re lying on the floor of what looks like a small cabin. The main area, where you are, is a small neat kitchen and a living room joined together. There’s a table in the corner by the kitchen, a couch, rug, and small coffee table in front of a fireplace that’s currently burning with wood. You lay between the table and fireplace on the rug, a fleece throw covering you. Your bag is, what looks like tossed on the couch. You quickly crawl over to it, sighing in relief to find your camera undamaged.  

Your head is pounding, you reach back to scratch your back to find teeth holes in your shirt. Your ass and backs of your legs brown with dirt, looking like you were dragged. You freeze when you hear a whine. You look over to see small hallway that what looks like it leads to a bathroom on the right, and a small bedroom across from it, there's a door at the very end, looks like a linen closet.  

You slowly and quietly stand up, you carefully toe off your boots, hoping your sock covered feet won’t make much noise. You grab the fireplace poker as a weapon and follow the noise. When you reach the bedroom, the door cracked, you find the wolf curled on a large dog bed in the corner, furiously licking the wound on his leg, the one you gave it. 

You take a deep breath and push the door open. The wolf growls as soon as he sees you, he tries to stand up but whines and falls back down. You gently set your makeshift weapon down and turn to the bathroom. You rummage through the cabinets and drawers to find what you’re looking for. 

Walking back into the bedroom, you slowly make your way to the wolf, he growls and buries himself more in the corner. 

“It’s okay,” you murmur. “I just want to help.” You gesture to his leg, you set the supplies down and cautiously stick your hand out for him to sniff.  

Once he assures you aren’t here to hurt him, but to help him, he lays his head down and watches you from the corner of his eye. Once settled beside him, you dip a washcloth in warm water and gently clean his wound. He whines and jerks his leg. 

“I know, I’m sorry. Let me fix what I caused,” you say softly. Once you finish cleaning the wound, you wrap it in gauze.  

“There, all better,” you cautiously reach out to pet his fur. He lets you; you reach up to scratch behind his ears, he closes his eyes and nuzzles your hand. 

You giggle. “You aren’t so bad, huh?” He just lays his head in your lap. You look over at the nightstand to see a picture of two tall, muscular men. One with shoulder length brown hair, blue eyes, and a metal arm. Huh. You think as you look at the metal arm, the other guy has blonde hair, blue eyes- not a sparkly as the other guy’s is- he doesn’t have a metal arm like his friend. 

You pick up the picture. “Is one of these your... owner? Did they find me?” You question the wolf, knowing he probably doesn’t even understand you much less can answer your question. The wolf opens his eyes, he looks to the picture then back to you, giving you almost a deadpanned look.  

Just then the sound of the front door opening and closing, and the sound of feet padding through the cabin, fill the silence. 

“Hey, Buck! I just wanted to check in and se-what the hell?” The blonde man from the picture stops short when he sees you, his eyes widened.  

“Uh, hi,” you give him a shy smile. 

“Who are you and what the hell are you doing in here?” He asks, almost harshly.  

“I’m Y/N. I was exploring the forest when I... I had seen him. Needless to say, he chases me, I cut his back leg, I fell and hit my head. I woke up here and helped patch up his wound. That’s the short version. I’m guessing the other man lives here? Is this his... pet?” You gesture to the picture on the nightstand. 

The man snorts. “Yes, the other man lives here, I’m Steve and the other man is James but everyone calls him Bucky.” 

“How do you get Bucky from James?” 

“His middle name is Buchanan” 

You hum in understanding. “Will this Bucky be back soon? I’d like to apologize for hurting his wolf” 

Steve grins in amusement. “You’re petting him right now.” 

“Huh?” You look down at the wolf still nuzzling your hand.  

Steve snickers and leans down next to you; he reaches over to pet Bucky but he growls in warning. Steve puts his hands up in surrender and chuckles. “The towns people didn’t tell you about our kind?” 

“Your kind?” You look at him, confused. 

“We are a wolf/human kind, we shift to our wolf form during full moon. Bucky here is the alpha.”  

“What?! Are you jok-this is a joke, right?” You ask in disbelief. You go to stand up but Bucky whines and puts his front half on you, nuzzling into your stomach. 

Steve chuckles. “Somebody likes you.”  

“So, you’re telling me that the whole, alpha, omega, beta crap exists?” He nods, you go quiet, not knowing what to say. 

Steve spends the next couple of hours explaining everything to you. From the pack, to why he isn’t in his wolf form, once you have a mate you can shift whenever you like but they still have ruts/heats after the full moon. Steve left with the request of watching over Bucky, you agreed, and that he’d be back in a few days. He also said to be careful, once full moon is over and Bucky shifts back, he’d go into rut. 

You stay on the floor for a while, Bucky still half on you and asleep. When he does wake up, he sits up and start to rip the bandage off.  

“Bucky wait-it's not done healing,” you go to stop him but he gets it fully off, showing that the wound is healed. “What the..?” You whisper, tracing the area the wound was at.  

“You’re just full of surprises, aren’t you?” You giggle. He sticks his tongue out and pulls his lips back, almost like a smile. 

He pauses and sniffs the air, he tilts his head, you giggle. He leans towards you, sniffing. He all but shoves his cold, wet nose into your neck, inhaling deeply. You yelp and giggle, trying and failing to push him away.  

“Bucky!” You laugh. He licks up your neck and you laugh harder. He nuzzles his head into your chest.  

“You’re a goofball. Listen, I have to go out and grab my stuff from my hotel if I’m gonna stay here for the next couple of days, okay?” His head pops up, ears flat and whines. “Awe,” you coo and scratch behind his ears. “I’ll be back, I promise. Wanna walk me to the edge of the woods?” He jumps up and runs to the door.  

You leave the bag you brought and head out, once off the mini porch Bucky stops, he motions to his back.  

“You want me to get on your back?” You ask in a slight condescending tone. He was huge, on all four legs he was just past your waist, but you weren’t skinny and you’d worry you might hurt him.  

He nods. “Won’t I crush you?” He rolls his eyes and waits. You sigh, giving in you straddle his back, legs wrapped around him just in front of his back legs, arms around his neck. Once you’re settled, he takes off, your grip tightens.  

Once you get almost to the edge of the woods he stops and lets you off.  

“You’ll wait for me?” He nods and lays in the brush out of sight.  

You head off to your hotel, grabbing your stuff and checking out. You get back to the woods, “Bucky!” You call out. Nothing. You walk a little further, where he had been laying was a pool of blood. 

Bucky!  

[almond-tofuuu]

Finals Week with Zayne ❄️

@scrumptious-cheesecake

"Can you write Zayne x reader who's a university student and how he takes care of her during her finals?!?"

I hope this is okay, still getting used to writing and this is my first request soooo

Fingers crossed 🤞 it's alright

● As a doctor, Zayne has had to do his fair share of studying and exams so he understands better than anyone how stressful finals week can be. He'll try not to bother you too much at this time, not wanting to disturb your studies, but he will regularly check in with you to make sure you're still taking care of yourself. Will remind you to eat and stay hydrated, makes sure you take breaks and don't work yourself to the point of exhaustion.

● Since he's also busy with work, he'll let you spend the week at his home or with him at the hospital so he can keep an eye on you. Will 100% become your personal chef for the week (says it's so he can make sure you're eating a balanced diet but secretly just enjoys the demesticity of it, and loves taking care of you)

● Zayne Is a smart guy, so if you need help with anything he's ready to assist. Whether you need someone to review material with or quiz you on a certain topic, Zayne is there to help. (Instead of sitting down to read a book on a night he now sits with you and helps you review all the work you've done that day, his eyes softening and a small smile on his face bc he's just so proud of how hard you're working)

● Don't be afraid to let him know if you need some space or time alone, and also don't worry if the stress causes you to be more irritable or upset, Zayne doesn't take it personally. He knows how overwhelming finals week can be, so if you have some mood swings or ask him for some quiet time, he will understand and give you the space you need.

● On the flip side of this, if you need some comfort and reassurance, Zayne is ready to provide that as well. And while he may not be the best at verbalising his feelings, he will make an effort for you.

Zayne sat on the sofa in his apartment, you on his lap, face nuzzled into his chest as he held you in his arms. Leaning down to plant a soft kiss on your forehead, letting his lips linger as he whispers against your skin, his voice low and gentle "you should be proud of yourself, y/n, you're working very hard"

"I'm confident you'll do well, you're a smart girl.... You're my smart girl"

"just relax, sweetheart, you deserve a rest"

"it's okay, you can close your eyes, I'll hold you for as long as you need baby"

[eatmeandbirthmeagain]

Hope you're doing well for this week and good luck on your exams! I have a request!

Baldwin has a wife who's a secretly witch, she came from a royal family with ties of witchcraft but had to keep it a secret because of the church, but she loves him a lot and was willing to do little spells of good luck everyday or before a battle.

Baldwin doesn't know this but he does get a tad suspicious with the luck he's been having.

♡ My Lucky Charm - King Baldwin x Reader ♡

♡ Fluff ♡

A/N: Hello Chicken Blitz! I hope you are also doing well, and thank you for wishing me well on the exams 🤞. Thank you for this lovely request, its so cute and I had fun writing it. I hope you enjoy it! As always, this is based on the film Kingdom Of Heaven, not the real historical figgures. Enjoy!

TW: Leprosy

Y/n and Baldwin the fourth had been married for three years. Wed at sixteen years old, now nineteen. Three years of marriage and having been acquainted since the age of seven but still the young king suspected nothing of y/n’s true nature.

Y/n had been a practicing witch since she could walk. Her mother had taught her everything she needed to know, from spells of protection to powerful curses. She had learnt quickly and by the time she was sixteen was a very powerful witch.

The spells she performed were legend in her coven. Her family was descended from English royalty but broke away to travel to the Holy Land in hope to build an alliance. The women in her family were witches.

That was how it had been for generations. And every single man in the family was oblivious to it, if they knew then the coven would be burnt to the ground. Sacred sites destroyed, spells of protection over land ruined. It was not possible to allow anybody to gain access to the true nature of their family.

Y/n was no different when she was wed to Baldwin. And how she loved him. They had been acquainted for many years prior to their marriage and already loved each other greatly, even before they were married.

The night of their wedding, y/n swore to herself that she would never let anybody hurt her sweet husband. She held him in her arms for the first time that very night. She whispered to him that she would never let anybody harm him and if they did, she would make sure they died in an awful and painful death.

He had not heard her say this, for he was already peacefully asleep. Exhausted from the wedding, the long hours of standing taking its toll on his diseased body. She had stroked his hair and promised to always protect him. No matter what.

She placed spells of protection over him and his army when they went to battle against Saladin just a few months later. They returned victorious.

She kept the kingdom safe with regular sacrifice and rituals. But most importantly, every day she placed spells of protection over her beautiful husband. He needed all the strength he could get and she was more than happy to provide it all.

----------------

She would spend her days in the woods, collecting ingredients and used every last one ensuring his safety and strength. Her tireless work started to show greatly when the young king's disease began to have less and less of an physical impact on his body. He grew stronger and stronger day by day. The painful looking sores clearing and the feeling in his limbs began to return slowly.

She spent long hours in the forest and her private chambers, performing spell after spell, sneaking ingredients into his drinks, doing whatever she could do until every trace of disease that plagued him was gone.

It was a miracle. The physicians were baffled and Baldwin was equally as confused. But y/n was overjoyed. She had done it, but she continued her relentless efforts. She did not stop until every last trace of disease was rid from his beautiful body.

“Y/n, I have some news” he confessed to her one warm spring afternoon, attempting to hide a smile and failing slightly. “Yes my husband?” y/n had replied, looking up from her book with a forced curiosity, already knowing exactly what he was going to say. “I am cured my love, my leprosy is gone! The physicians don't know how it is possible, but it is truly a miracle!” he picked her up and spun her around, with the biggest smile on his face. She giggled and smiled at his words.

He placed her down and cupped his hands around her cheeks. “Do you know what that means? It means we can be together forever y/n!”. The two were overjoyed at the news but only she knew the truth. This was no miracle. It was simply the love of a witch, manifested in the form of riding a frail body of disease. Returning it to its true strength. Out of nothing but love.

It was not just this. The luck he had been experiencing since being wed to y/n was shocking. Everything had been going well in the kingdom. Battles had been won, alliances had been formed, conflicts had been resolved, famines had been lifted and now his disease that would have seen him in an early grave had been cured? This was incredible.

“It must be you, my love,” he confessed to her one night. “You are my lucky charm”, the young queen had blushed at his words. Indeed she was. And as long as she lived, she would be.

Even after everything, Baldwin remained oblivious to her abilities. And y/n was more than happy to keep it that way. She would much rather him remain in the dark about her talents than be exposed to the church. She hoped that he was too happy with his success to grow suspicious.

Even though the possibility of a witch's intervention had crossed his mind at the comment of a physician, he chose to ignore it. There was no reason for him to question anything. He was healthy, all was well in his kingdom, and he had a wonderful, caring wife who adored him. What more could a young man wish for?

[evilvvithin]

Completely random König's HCs I wrote down in the spawn of past few weeks

• cat person (been mentioned many times but i just had to include it anyway)

• anonymously donates to multiple organizations that help and protect animals

• one time he owned multiple male beta fishes and didn’t realize they can’t live together. It took him a long before he finally stopped buying a new one every time they fought to one’s death

• prefers simple showers to baths, not only he doesn’t really fit in them but he loves to feel the water run down his body it soothes him

• he likes sour pickles and is able to just open jar and eat it whole in one sitting

• has visible scar on his face going down from his eyebrow which he carries with him since childhood, it's a memory at one of his first "real" fights

• the most badass, rough, toughest dudes at first sight till you get to know him. He's still badass even after you know him, but you realize he's way more friendly and sweet actually

• very talkative, loves throwing random dad jokes after every sentence if he can

• metal head, don't even @ me

• he wears at least 2 massive rings

• collects his fave band shirts

• loves to read more than watching TV

• only owns couple of fake plants cause he's scared he wouldn't be able to take care about normal ones

• he is like a cat himself. You gotta earn his trust and friendship. He just doesn't actively go making friends because he'd been hurt a lot in the past by his friends bullying him or making fun of him

• he loves sweets, anything sweet

• has like 10 lip balms but doesn't know where he left any of them so he keeps buying new ones

• adores old cars and owns one

• hates summer or warm weather in general

• loves sweets but when it comes to coffee he drinks the blackest, most bitter one. Just pure black, no milk no sugar

• loves going for a walk in the forest when he wakes up super early in the morning and it's still foggy and dark outside

• literally only uses his phone for texting (or looking at pics of you 24/7)

• loves to smell good and doesn't mind spending unholy amount of money for a good cologne

• doesn't like the taste of fish

• has large hands with long fingers

• can't stand mint smell or anything mint flavored especially chocolate

• loves talking to elderly people or randomly helping them with shopping bags and such

• has few large and visible scars over his back and chest and tons of small, almost invisible ones

• he literally looks like Jim Boeven unmasked and that is conclusion I came to after staring at him in the game menu for days and now I cannot picture König any other way (let's hope they reveal his face soon 🤞)

• loves cooking and has custom kitchen built for his height so he can comfortably cook in it, it makes the kitchen almost unusable for you everything is so high even the table

[arcadekitten]

Hello Arcadekitten!!! I read the Stellamb wedding post(s) and it got me wondering about how Stella’s wedding dress would look like… I absolutely love Sweet No Death, so I knew I had to make some artwork of it!! And, because I absolutely suck at explaining things through text, here is my interpretation of Stella’s wedding outfit in traditional art! ✨💫🌟

Materials Used: Mixed Media Paper, Ink Fineliner Pens, Alcohol Markers Gel Pens, Paint Pens, Highlighter and Mechanical Pencil

Time Took: 1 week

I don’t know if you’re okay with people sending fanarts and stuff to you, but I absolutely love your work and well, I’m quite proud of this piece (even if I probably shouldn’t be lol) as I worked extremely hard on this and wanted to share it with you! I hope that’s okay ❤️

A little artist “#Deep Dive tm” because I put WAY too much effort into the tiniest details and I am NOT gonna let them get overlooked 😤 /jk

-Stella’s dress is made with her signature colors rather than white, because I felt that with her being a Star Witch and all, a species that mostly has extravagantly colorful clothes (in my humble opinion) she felt that just going with plain white on what is possibly the most important day of her life would feel… well, a bit redundant, so she opted for a more ‘colored’ ballgown, with lacy gloves and a pearled veil and all. The local tailor and dressmaker is a bit confused, but Lambchop is definitely not complaining! ;) 💕💓

-(Well, that, and I also felt that the color blended WAY too much with her skin tone and changed it, but that’s my little secret hehe 👀😉)

-In my mind, Stella can make her hair look like it has a small galaxy within it! With actual moving stars and little twinkling lights. ✨💫✨⭐️🌟I think that she usually saves it for special, grandiose occasions, buuut since she’s not the kind of person who would THROW a grand, special occasion, she never unveiled it before her wedding day! (Poor Lambchop’s heart nearly gave out on the spot right then and there! 😭❤️)

-I didn’t add her usual Star hair clip because she already has like… 10 stars in her design already lmao /lh ⭐️

-As you can see, her bouquet’s… cloth? Fabric? I’m not sure what to call it… thing? The stuff that her flowers are wrapped in are Lambchop’s colors! Thought that it would be a neat visual detail… also, I can totally imagine Stella requesting that specific color scheme from the local florist! 💐🌷🌸

-Speaking of flowers… I decided to color in one of the moon daisies a little bit… differently hehe ;) It’s a small reference to the beginning of the game, where we see Stella change the color of the one rebellious moon daisy, from orange to lavender, except this time… she keeps it and uses it in her bouquet! 💖💗

-I like to think that it symbolizes Lambchop versus the rest of the townspeople… and Stella’s way of acknowledging him as a “real person”, at least compared to the others… one who is different, one who is unique… the one that she’s going to marry 💍🩷

-(it’s so absolutely sappy when she tells him so that he just couldn’t resist kissing her right then and there)

-And finally… (this is the last one I promise) I cut out the entire drawing to make it look like a potion bottle, partially because Stella is a witch, and partially because I had this cute lil idea that she stores all of her happiest memories into a magical bottle and takes it out whenever she feels sad, so that she can ‘experience’ it again and feel happier. Of course, with Lambchop by her side, she never really has to use it!💞🩷💗

-And yes, I also made the bottle have Lambchop colors as well 🐏 Just a nice little thing tying em together more visually… ❤️

…And I am SO SORRY for ranting!!! I worked incredibly hard on this piece (traditional art is NOT my strong suit, lol) but I wanted to make something special for one of my favorite games and one of my favorite game devs! So here it is, and I hope that you like it! 🤞❤️😁

(P.S: Any ideas for Lambchop’s wedding design?)

Oh my goodness this is BEAUTIFUL!! The artwork itself is just stunning!! You took so much time on it and it really shows, especially with all your attention to detail in it(and I LOVE hearing your explanations for some of the choices you made!! They're just so darling!) Everything about this is stellar and I'm in love with it, thank you so much!! ♡ ♡ ♡

Also I TOTALLY AGREE Stella would not wear white for her wedding!! Color all the way!! ♡

As for Lambchop's outfit...I think I've got it envisioned in my head but I haven't quite drawn anything for it yet! Top hat, definitely. I think his suit isn't black. Probably brown! Bowtie on the neck. His pants are more like shorts and are cut juuuuust above the knee! Still wearing long socks with garters. He looks incredibly dapper--as he should!! It's his wedding!

Hopefully he at least looks good for the photos before he decides to get any mysterious red stains on his outfit. (It's fine. Stella could clean them with the snap of her fingers, but still!)

[lifeofsims3]

Hello lovelies! I decided to set up a ko-fi, to hopefully get my simblr out there to others. I know it's cheeky, especially considering how the majority of simblr feels about paywalls put up by cc creators - and I don't even make cc! I post about my silly sims, in the hopes that some of you like what I put out there.

But on a personal note;

life is kicking my ass right now, as I'm sure it is to many of you. I'll be turning 30 this year, and have always struggled with mental health, but increasingly so since I reached my 20s. My only source of income is from caring for my dad, which up until now has been hard but doable with the help of other family financially. But as some of you may have seen me post about, my laptop is in need of repair. On top of that, this past week my kitty Cindy has been to the vet, not only to have 3 teeth removed, but also a biopsy done on a suspicious lump she has on her gum. Cindy is also diabetic, which I have been managing with her diet, but she is now 14 years old, and getting older has meant diet alone isn't enough, and she is being put on insulin. As you can imagine the insulin alone incurs a monthly cost, as well as vet appointments to check her sugar levels regularly so we can gauge her correct dosage. Depending on the results of the biopsy there may be even more serious things on the horizon. Although I have all my fingers and toes crossed that it's nothing serious. 🤞

Suffice it to say my anxiety right now is making me a wreck, and usually I would take solice in my funny little sims. But without my laptop I can't, and I feel very cutoff from my usual coping mechanisms and friends I usually chat with!

All this to say, I expect nothing and didn't when I started this blog. But seeing how close this community can be, and how welcomed I've been in these few months, I felt like this was a small option I could throw out into the tumblr void in my time of need. If anything it makes me feel better even just having it there, because it makes me feel like I'm at least trying to do something to help my situation, at a time when mental health makes trying anything extremely difficult for me.

If you read this far then honestly that's more of a help than you can imagine, and you're a trooper for reading the ramblings of a mad woman. In any case, I wish all you lovelies well, keep simming you beauties 💚💚

[hotpotatoshealthjourney]

A brief introduction to what multiple sclerosis (the main thing I have) is, from someone I follow on fb. She is very good at explaining things and very real about her struggles.

It’s been a rough week. Hopefully this coming week will be better. I had to cancel home health pt on Thursday (but managed to force myself to do it on Friday instead, but it was a major struggle). My body was just beat all week. Took at least one nap every day, most days at least 2 naps. So exhausted, so sore, so mentally worn out as well.

My doc put me back on 2 of my old anxiety meds that have worked for me in the past, so hopefully those work for me in the next few weeks. I could use the help. My depression is still at bay thankfully, but my anxiety is trying hard to beat me. I won’t let it. I’m stronger now than ever before and I *will* get through this.

Sir’s first week back at week is probably a big part of why the week was so rough. It made the anxiety get so much worse I’m sure, and definitely when my mind is struggling my body struggles more too. Tomorrow is a brand new week and I’m not going to bring last week’s problems with me into the new week.

Monday I am going to make at *least* 3 of the important phone calls I need to make (hopefully more, but it depends on how the first 3 go really). Depending on how those go, I might have some really good news financially that’ll cheer me up a lot. At worst, it won’t be any worse than I thought as of beginning of this past week. At best, it will save us thousands of dollars and get some nicer stuff that we wouldn’t have been able to afford for years and years. Fingers crossed!! I’ll update about it all after I make the calls.

Pt this week was primarily focused on balance. Stuff that to anyone with a normal-ish body seems crazy easy but for me was crazy difficult. “Ok so let go of the handles to your walkers, put your feet closer than shoulder width apart, no, closer than that too, good. Now stand there a bit looking forward. Good job! Now close your eyes and do it some more!” Omg so difficult. I really thought I was going to topple over several times. There was standing on one leg for like 2 seconds each over and over - I think she let me hold on gently for those. That was so hard, cuz my weak leg didn’t want to hold me up, but the other way my weak leg also didn’t want to lift up, so it was lose lose, hehe. Then the last balance thing was really more of a stretch and was the only part I enjoyed. Little slanted triangle thing she sat on the floor in front of me. I stand on it and it stretches my calves. Feels soooo nice.

We then did 3 different arm exercises with the weight rubber band thingies, then she left and I took a nap…I was out cold like 10 minutes after she closed the door behind herself, lol. Exhausting! And Sir keeps wondering why I don’t have the energy for sex lately. He’s been horny constantly lately, and keeps coming on to me, and most of the time I’ve either been just letting him fuck me cuz I’m too tired to resist, or telling him no cuz I’m just too tired to handle it at all. I feel bad for him, poor guy, and it’s not like I haven’t been horny, I’m just so fucking exhausted. I got my dose of Ritalin upped this week so hopefully that and the anxiety meds will eventually help. Hopefully. 🤞 I remain hopeful, which continues to amaze me given all that I’m going through. I’m truly proud of myself, honestly.

[cazluvsu]

hello. celtics-bengals anon here.

that one... hurt. probably the most, because i had hope after that fumble. if there hadn't been the fumble actually, it might've been better. but our horrible awful defense did it! and i understand running it, to not risk another interception and all -but to lose on a missed field goal!

it wasn't even evan's fault. just... damn, football sucks. i'll still watch next week, but at this rate, even a win against the giants isn't guaranteed. frustrating because they ARE better than 1-4 and if they were a little bit luckier, they would be 2-3 or even better, but. 1-4 is where they stand. depressing.

at least the celtics blew out the nuggets, even if it's still the preseason. yay.

hello . again 😞😞 much yapping under the cut

yeah that was so fucking devastating lmfao. not a great day for me personally (bills lost in Also devastating fashion!!)

i’ll just explain my entire day Teehee sorry for using ur asks to rant every week atp but i enjoy them keep asking 🤗🤗 when the bengals win A game we can celebrate together 🤞

i go to work. work sucks! sometimes if it’s slow i can watch red zone or something else but nope! i end up staying later than i was supposed to and by the time i get to drive home i am Devastated bc 1 im tired lol and 2 i didn’t get to watch Any of the bills game!!! and i wanted to watch it so bad!!!!! and there was no way for me to go back and watch it bc i don’t live in buffalo or Houston so i don’t get the game in my area. So starting off strong. but. !! i get home and i realize the bills game actually was broadcast to me!! and it all recorded!!!! i could watch the entire game lfg!!!!!!!! so i do!!! i didn’tlook at my phone at all to get spoilers, it looks rough at the beginning but the bills come back and tie it with some luck!!! and then they fucking lose!!!!!! so i am already sad. i go on twitter as the start of the bengals ot starts playing bc that’s just. what records after the game is over i guess. i’m like Oh let’s see if the other team i am emotionally invested in can win and make me less sad!! and it looks like all is well with that fumble!! and they drive into evan’s fg range and the commentators are saying all these stats about how he’s perfect from 50+ this season, he has 14 straight made fgs in the 4th/ot, life seems great!!!!!! and then he misses 😀😀😀😀😀😀 watching the replay of the holder drop the ball literally killed me and then that run by henry immediately after (ptsd from the bills game last week lmfao) was just great ☺️☺️ so. Yeah it’s all devastating and football sucks i am never watching a game again (lie)

i completely agree it’s so much more frustrating when u Know they are much better than their record. they were right there in every game they’ve lost!!!! if their offense looked how it did in every other game Besides that first pats game, that’s a W. the ja’marr penalty in the chiefs game (horrible. i hate it. i hate thinking about it. Anyways! ). the commanders game. Literally did not punt!!! but the defense!!!!!! their offense is great like everyone predicted and it’s So frustrating when they can’t do anything but watch as the defense gives up points in crucial moments. Ugh.

and yeah it is still early (ish) in the season but when they’ve had the same issues in every game it makes it hard to believe they’ll really get that much better to propel them to the playoffs or like. A winning record. but what can u do 😕😕

the celtics will always be the light through the darkness 🙂‍↕️ (i forgot they played today) hope ur doing well tho anon 🫂🫂

[messiisgodibeliveinhim]

Hey, all! I'm back with the second chapter of the Obi-wan Kenobi tv show rewrite.

This fic is going to be my biggest work, maybe even more than 8 chapters. I've already jotted down all the plot points and characterizations I want in this fic, so that I could follow a concise structure. Though, I have to also make sure that I stay well within the established StarWars lore and that requires some research😅

But, I'm trying to keep to the timeline of posting one chapter a week. Hope that I can stick to it🤞

Anyways, I enjoyed writing this chapter a lot and am excited for y'all to read it. Let me know what y'all think🤩

[schmedterlingfreud]

​🩶​Day [20 of 100] of Productivity​🩶​

Writing: - La cosa più pericolosa - Chapter 22; Work in progress - Effetto Luna - Chapter 19; Editing in progress, coming soon (next week if I'm doing things right 🤞) - I'm actually still thinking about and working on that brand-new project I started this summer. Even if I said it wasn't that important, and too rough, with a too-many-holes plot, I found myself digging and finding something new almost every day, so it may result in something I could actually write. Big news are that it now has a title (and a theme)! I'm swinging (as the writers God intended) between the urge to overshare the details and the reasonable will to keep them for me. I wonder what I'm going to do about it. As if I do not have too many WIPs on my ink-stained hands, uurgh…

Reading: - The Man in the High Castle, by Philip K. Dick - The Handmaid's Tale, by Margaret Atwood

Listening to: Minecraft OST

Snacking on: Marshmallow cupcakes

Extra: This week I've been experimenting with a lot of news at work -- now I'm starting to work on the factory machines, and not just the production line (… damn lack of staff). In fact, I was hoping this day would have never come, since I was sweating cold from the anxiety of being entrusted with the responsibility of an industrial machine. Luckily, the coworkers who are supporting and teaching me are chill people. Strict but not aggressive. My fear of disappointing expectations is sky-high anyway, as always. This work isn't even as difficult as I thought it would be. It's similar (and maybe even easier) to what I did when I used to work in the saw blades factory, where I was in charge of setting up and checking out my machine during the printing process. And I've found that I've missed cursing the machines when they don't respond to commands, more than I thought (now it's “Take the fucking crackers and put them in your fucking metal arse”, instead of “Take the fucking blade and put it in your fucking metal arse”). ⚙️​ The disappointment of the week is that, unfortunately, the hemp extract pills I bought for my chronic pain don't seem to work. I'm disappointed, but not that surprised. After all, even when I smoke weed I barely feel a change in my body and brain👀​. My contracture on the left side of my body seems to be getting worse day by day, so I'm risking an overdose of anti-inflammatories, which seem to be the only drugs that really help me. I have blood tests next week, and a new visit with the rheumatologist in the next few months. Let's hope for the better…

[samuelroukin]

bruh it's my last week of work and I'm doing SO much gardening. monday was an hour of getting samples (aka pruning). today was legit 2 hours of pruning in a greenhouse (it wasn't hot today so it wasn't too bad, but the plants were all over the walls and almost up to the ceiling and none of us are close to 6 feet). I found a leaf in my bra later today and the other person who did most of the pruning with me found some in her pants. I've gardened more in the last 2 weeks than the rest of my life before combined (and most of that gardening has been in the last 5 months because of this job)

last wednesday I accidentally closed my car door on my hand (not my finger, the whole hand). the bruise is finally starting to show up and my hand is fine (it just feels like a big bruise) but I can't keep it in one position for too long without it hurting which means I can't jerk my thang :( and I can't switch hands bc then I'd have to scroll with my hurt hand which would still keep it in one position. silliest soldiers toughest battles etc

very thankful to be almost done because commute + can sleep in again + the cost of stuff in the store room is ridiculous and makes me want to go feral (/negative) and ***** ****** ******* even though it's not my money.

also the cat my dad has been feeding has finally started to come inside. he explored the entire house on sunday! but still won't let me pet him even though I feed him 🙄 I know cats do what they want but he's soft and I wouldn't mind touoching <- keyboard mistake I don't care to fix

oof that sounds tiring but also fun cause i love plants lol

you gotta get Creative with it! or suffer a little longer ig, i hope it heals up soon tho 🤞

i can't figure out those asterisks but yay sleeping in!!

progress! he probably just needs a little more time, plus cats can Sense when you want it too much lol, just gotta be patient 🙏

ljhskjgfst there's just not much to share, my life is extremely uneventful and i don't do anything 💀

[thegamingcatmom]

Hey!!♥️😽 I see you haven't posted in a while I hope everything is going well!

I have a question. How do you think maggot mommy would react to their mate cuddling up to them in their sleep? Maybe because it's been a long time since they have had physical contact with an actual person, or because they are unconscious and it's just a natural response for them? Miss ya!

Okay so I kinda got carried away a bit so now there´s quite a lot leading up to the actual moment you´ve actually asked for - the grande finale, if you will - and I dunno I´m...sorry? I- 💀💀💀

BUT, first things first-

Why hello, dear nonny! 😽

Everything´s peachy! Life´s just been quite busy these past few months and it´s likely gonna remain that way for a little while longer. But all good things (hopefully)! 🤞🍀

Thank you for asking, that´s very sweet of you. ♥

And I hope things are going great for you as well! 🙏💚

NOW, let´s get to the juicy part. Hope yall are ready for a rather horny mf confused gremlin in this next installment of "Evil Dead Rise...but gayer":

Monsters

This is a direct follow-up to my last installment where Momma got half her face ripped off. Just so yall know where we currently are time-wise. ✌️

Oh, a fair warning: The tone of things might be beginning to...change from here. Just a smidge. 🤏😇

(Sidenote: I was mainly listening to this while writing. I've always been drawn to anything supernatural, and this song gives such otherworldly vibes, trying to lull you in while actually being quite sinister and tragic at the same time. 💔)

LET´S GO!

When you were little, your mother would sit with you every night, tuck you in, and tell you "bedtime stories" - stories that would haunt you for the rest of your childhood and well into your adolescent years. Crafted to keep you from getting into trouble, to make you behave by using a "weapon" that is as cliche as it is effective:

A monster.

There´s always a god damn monster somewhere.

"Do you know what will happen to your socks if you keep leaving them strewn about? The Sock Monster under your bed will snatch them up. One day, it might not be just the socks."

"Do you know what happens to children who stay in bed all day? The Monster in your closet will come out late at night when everyone is asleep to drag you out of the bed and into Closet Land."

"Do you know what happens to children who won´t wash themselves when told to? The Shower Monster behind the curtain will come out, grab you, and drag you down through the drain into the sewers."

Needless to say, you were thoroughly traumatised. At some point though, you managed to snap yourself out of those irrational fears, recognizing these stories for what they really were: Illusions. And you firmly believed in that up until a few weeks ago.

Until the day these "Bedtime stories" became more than just stories. They became your reality.

One of these... things is currently occupying the spot under your bed. Its eyes are unblinking, staring into nothingness. It´s emitting a clicking sound now and then but is otherwise as still as a statue... or so one might think. Its clawed hands are firmly embedded in the floor, its whole body poised, as if waiting for something.

Another thing has taken up residence in the closet. Its doors are cracked open just enough, allowing anyone stupid brave enough to wander into this room to see the eye staring back at them. There's no missing that bright, ominous glow. Nor the heavy breathing.

And then there's the thing in the adjacent bathroom, sitting—no—lounging in the bathtub. One leg out, foot propped up against the tap, the whole skin sporting a discolored look with darkish splotches that extend all the way up to the nails - causing them appear nearly black. One arm thrown over the edge, hand suspended in the air, drops of water dripping from tips that resemble more talons down onto the floor - the only sound in this room. The bathtub is filled with rather colorful water, and if one were to take a closer look, they could see bits and pieces of... something swimming in it, breaking the surface every now and then.

The curtain is open, giving burning eyes a clear view into the bedroom and to the bed where you are, dead to the world. Recent happenings finally took their toll, no doubt, causing you to pass out shortly after your head hit the pillow - a clean head at that, for once. Still a bit damp and slighty soaking the pillow. You couldn´t care less though - this is the best sleep you´ve gotten since...well, since everything went to absolute shit.

You still can´t believe you managed to wriggle your way out of that rather wet chokehold and into the bathtub. Can´t believe how easy it actually was. It was sort of a knee-jerk reaction on your part as well. Having absolutely had it with your demonic roommate mounting you, leaving its slobber all over you-

Your whole body had tensed, hands shot up from where they'd been hanging onto bony shoulders for dear life after that latest onslaught to grip a sunken face very tight indeed - nails digging not only into skin, but also muscles and tendons because, in your rage, you kinda forgot that thing was still missing half Its face. Fingertips hooking into an exposed jawbone to yank! It towards you, noses nearly touching, staring It down and right into Its soul, absolutely willing to throw caution to the wind if it meant getting your message across loud and clear, and, oh boy-

Loud and clear you were.

"FUCKING STOP USING ME AS YOUR FUCKING STRESS RELIEVER, YOU FUCKING WEIRD ASS PSYCHO BITCH!"

...

The silence that had followed was deafening, the only sound being your heavy breathing, and you feared you´d just signed your own death warrant. Well, so be it then. At least you were going down with dignitiy.

What you hadn´t expected, however, was the reaction that followed. Or, lack thereof.

The look of utter disbelief on Its face was priceless - the slow blinking being the only indication there was still some form of life within that decomposing body. But, more importantly, it had given you enough time to-

You had been eyeing that rather sharp-looking piece of wood from what used to be a dresser for quite a while earlier, poking out between Its rips, practically begging you to pull.

Using Its dumbfounded state to your advantage, your hand had released Its jawbone and reached down in a hurry, seizing that stake and ripping it out in one go, sending dark red blood spurting out of Its torso.

You hadn´t given It a chance to react, to even realize what was happening, before you had that stake burried deep in Its head - using the gaping wound on Its face to ram the wooden piece in and all the way up, sending parts of brain and skull flying.

It had taken a bit longer than you´d anticipated, considering you´d just impaled Its head on a spike, but, eventually, the desired effects kicked in:

Eyes were slowly dimming, losing their ominous glow, until milky orbs were staring back at you. The grip on you had loosened, a clawed hand ripped out of the wall, as Its body went slack, collapsing to the side like a sack of potatoes.

You had quickly picked yourself up off the floor, having learnt from your previous scissors-attempt that this wasn´t a permanent state but rather... hitting the snooze button. You had minutes, best use them wisely.

You hadn´t bothered looking for an escape, simply because there was none. You had checked. It´s what you do in your leisure time these days. What´s been keeping you from going insane.

With nothing else to do, you had then opted for the next best thing, which meant-

You were getting that bath at last.

So, here you are now. Having the best sleep in a long while, blissfully unaware of the many glowing eyes currently watching you, observing you, guarding you.

Carrying out Momma´s orders.

And Momma´s been a lot more careful about her pick this time around. Thoroughly weighing up her options before coming to a decision which one of these pathetic creatures would be assigned the duty, the honor, of watching over what is hers.

In the end, her choice had fallen on what she believed to be her most capable soldiers. She still wasn´t certain if, or rather, how much she had been influenced by that wretched echo she just can´t seem to get rid of. The cunt that had previously inhabited this shell - Ellie.

Because two of those titty-sucking parasites were, right in this moment, watching over her precious mate.

This time, there better be no incidents, or so help her.

It has to be said though...she hadn´t expected that.

You putting that toothpick through her head after she so passionately made you hers again, well, she couldn´t care less about that, really. As if something as trivial as that was enough to fatally injure her. As if you would want to, anyway.

As if you could.

In fact, her twisted mind was brought back to a moment quite similar, where you had grabbed those rusty scissors and plunged them right through her nose, making that pathetic shell shut down for a while, too weak to withstand even the smallest of nicks, apparently. Disgusting.

But how could she blame you for that, when what she´s been doing to you must´ve felt absolutely heavenly - you singing for her so sweetly, so overcome with the throes of passion you began trashing about, which had then ended in said scissors-incident.

So yes, Maggot Momma could absolutely understand you going feral for her.

What she was still trying to wrap her warped mind around, however, was your...temper tantrum. By now, she´s become used to your rebellious tendencies, finds them to be quite enticing most of the time. They make this game of cat and mouse the two of you are playing simply mouthwatering.

This time, though, it had seemed different. You had seemed different. Like you weren´t playing anymore.

For the first time since the entity had taken over this shell, It had felt something other than the need to conquer and tear and dominate and rip rip rip SLASH THEM ALL OPEN make them rot in hell-

She had been vibrating when the entity had resurrected this shell, trashing about, smashing her head against the wall over and over and over-

She had felt too much, yet not nearly enough. It was most confusing, overwhelming, frustrating - driving her wild.

Something was trying to push its way past the haze of insanity. Something that had made her pause in the first place, when you were having that temper tantrum - grabbing her, screaming at her, stabbing her-

Refusing her.

The fog, at least for the moment, had been lifted.

The vibrating had stopped.

She´d gotten up, pulling that stake out of her head as she went, and had made her way to you - body gone into autopilot. Finding you had been rather easy - she was able to sense you, smell you. Smell your fear and-

Your excitement.

Or rather, lack thereof. A most acrid smell.

Seeing as you had locked her out, again, she had made her way up and through the vent until she´d reached the opening, directly above the room you were currently occupying. She had crawled out and down the wall, until she was standing directly in front of the bed you were still resting on, looking so peacefully. So unlike this other version of you she´d witnessed not too long ago.

She liked you better like this. Like you were now.

Her darling Drama Queen.

So obedient.

So submissive.

So good for her.

There had been steam coming from the bathroom, carrying a delicious aroma, urging her to investigate. The bathtub was filled with pinkish water still - an indication that you had cleansed yourself off recent happenings.

Off her.

The iron smell permeating the air was so prominent, she could almost taste it, taste you - that scent of yours easily overpowering everything else, drawing her in like a moth to a flame.

Thickening the fog yet again.

She had stumbled towards it, coming to a stop right in front, before letting herself fall, face-first, into everything that is you.

That smell, my god-

She wants it everywhere every time all of it-

And, technically, she could. There was no need for her to come up for air, at least not for quite a while. And even if she were to drown, the entity would simply bring back this shell like It had many times before.

However-

There was that nagging again, pushing its way through the haze to remind her of the more pressing matters at hand. Of you. Currently resting right next door. Unsupervised.

She won´t have that. Especially after recent events.

So, a choice had to be made.

～You titty-sucking parasites better not disappoint Mommy.～

Seeing as they all worked as one, there had been no need to leave her current position, good. She had called upon them using their shared link - a hive mind, if you will. Seeing all, hearing all. Had seen and heard many souls that were rotting in hell now.

All in all, very convenient.

So, here she was now, observing you from her place in the bathtub. Burning eyes almost willing you to wake up so she can do-

Something.

She wasn´t quite sure what to do with you, to you, once you´d wake up.

It was driving her mad.

Your form started to twitch then, turning this way and that. You were murmuring something, too incoherent to understand.

You´ve always intrigued her, the monster in her, from the very moment you´d first set foot into her territory. Trespassing. Asking for a direct trip to hell.

And yet-

Something about you had made the entity pause back then. Just like now, when you were-

Refusing her.

She was on the move, her gaze never leaving your twitching form, using her grip on the bathtub to slide herself over and down the other side, remaining low on the ground as she crawled her way over to you, soaking the carpet.

A clawed hand closes around the foot of the bed, the other followed suit, pulling herself up and sitting down cross-legged, hands coming to rest on her knees. Watching you.

Observing you.

Trying to figure you out.

You were still talking, no more than a breeze though. Still mumbling utter nonsense. Sweat was starting to form on your slightly flushed face, indicating you were having a dream. Or a nightmare?

Her head was slowly tilting to one side.

"Hm."

She was torn. Torn about what to do with you and your sudden outburst. What to make of it.

What´s brought this on? What´s been going through that pretty head of yours, as you were shouting at her so passionately? Something she would´ve found quite flattering under different circumstances, would´ve felt very smug about it indeed, as it usually meant you were thoroughly enjoying what she was doing to you, eyes alight with desire.

This time though, your eyes were the darkest she´s ever seen them, staring her down, challenging her, defying her, tempting her to-

She´s gonna gouge those eyes right out and swallow them whole, sink her teeth into its throat and rip it open, dig her claws into that chest and tear out the thing that keeps this pathetic shell going, sending its resident to ROT in hell for all eternity for revolting against her, trying to DOMINATE her as if it COULD when it´s up against an ALPHA, against DIVINITY WHOSE JUDGEMENT WILL MAKE THEM ALL BURN IN THE DARKEST PITS OF HELL BY THE HANDS OF THE DARK ONES-

No-

The enitity is shaking Its head then, hitting it over and over and over, claws digging in, piercing skin and bone and ripping out strands of matted red hair as they went, lips pulling back to reveal a sharp set of teeth that´ve come together with a pop!, the heavy breathing being the only sound in this room as-

No.

Not you, never you, her mate, her angel, meant for her as she´s meant for you, brought together by fate, meant to rule together as one and deliver judgement where judgement is due-

Besides-

You´re her good girl, are you not? Surely that twisted mind of hers is misjudging things. You simply meant to spice things up a little, didn´t you? Naughty girl. Pretending to revolt against her, to try and dominate her, just to see how far she would let you take your little game. You wanted a reaction from her.

That´s what she chose to believe anyway, because-

Momma would absolutely detest having to remind you what it means to be a good girl.

Her long, slender form was slowly bending forward, stretching out and over your huddled figure, long claws tenderly moving along your covered body as she went, caressing you, almost.

Hands come to a stop on either side of your head, caging you in. The added weight made you sink deeper into the bed, but you remained fast asleep.

You also didn´t take any note of the wet hair brushing against your cheeks, surrounding you like a curtain, as her head bent further down, nose nearly touching yours.

Burning eyes willing you to wake up, yet again.

You couldn´t care less though, it seemed. Even going so far as to burry yourself deeper into the sheets, a soft sigh escaping you, the corners of your mouth just so lifting, making you look softer, like you´re most content-

Another look she hasn´t seen on you yet.

How utterly confusing today is turning out to be.

Were you mocking her? Was this yet another game of Play Pretend? Was she about to have her head impaled again? This waiting game was really starting to irk her-

"Mmph!"

She´s been so busy staring into your soul that she didn´t notice you actually doing something, your touch coming so unexpected, she nearly started hissing, about to sink her teeth into that arm-

The arm that´s currently thrown around her shoulders, keeping her close, squishing her face into the pillow, cheek to cheek-

Caging her in.

You were stronger than you looked.

And she was feeling utterly confused.

One of those clawed hands remained gripping the pillow for support, the other was hovering just above it, next to your head, as if it didn´t quite know what to do, where to be. Burning eyes were wide open, wildly flitting about - left, right, up, down, right, left - like they were looking for an exit.

Now, Maggot Momma doesn´t do panic. She´s the cause of it, she thrives on it, it´s her trademark. The only time she would ever admit to feeling something that loosely resembles panic was when her prey was about to escape her clutches.

Something that has yet to happen, ergo-

Momma doesn´t do panic.

However, she´s still not quite sure how to get herself out of her current predicament without waking you. If you woke up, that´d mean she´d have to do...something, and considering she doesn´t know what something is yet, she´d rather you play dead for a little while longer. But that still raises the question-

How to get out of that chokehold?

On the other hand, her body was already starting to tingle-

Seeing as her sight was currently limited, the hand still hovering next to you was cautiously starting to feel around, searching for your hand that was hanging off her shoulder somewhere. As soon as sharp tips made contact, they were dancing along your skin until they reached your wrist, fingers slowly starting wrap around-

"Ssss-!"

Momma doesn´t do panic.

However, she will admit this caught her slightly off guard. It is for this reason she did absolutely nothing to stop you from rolling over and into her, letting you treat her like a giant doll that you could handle as you pleased, how utterly mortifying, beneath her-

And yet, you´ve managed to come out on top.

You seemed quite content there, too. All of you is by far not enough to cover all of her, but you still tried - head burrying in her neck, arms wrapping around her middle, legs stretching and stretching-

...And stretching some more-

And yet, it´s still not enough. Adorable.

There you were now, clinging to her like a baby koala. And there she was, laying motionless aside from her hands hovering over your body. How utterly pathetic, letting herself be dominated like a bitch in heat, if The Dark Ones could see her now-

"Hmm..."

And yet...

As your angelic voice reached her ears, warm breath hitting her neck repeatedly in short puffs, she found that she couldn´t give a lesser fuck. She was divinity itself, and she did as she damn well pleased.

Clawed hands come to rest on your back then, one between your shoulder blades, the other on your lower back, encasing you. Nose burrying itself in your hair, breathing you in. Once burning eyes - now dimmed to a soft glow - were starting to fall shut. Hips are not beginning to move, because-

For the first time since your arrival, the monster in her slumbered.

And she was right, after all-

You are still her good girl.

[theretirementstory]

01/09/2024. Greetings on this first Sunday in September, where the weather in Bar-sur-Aube is 22c (and sunny) we are due 32c so I will need to hide in the shade.

This photo was taken on September 1st 2018, that was when the town used to have the Foire aux Bulles on the first weekend of the month, which for some reason was given a new name “Bulles et Gastronomie Foire”and moved to a new slot, the last weekend of the month.

Let’s get my health news out of the way first! My platelets have not fallen to 10 or below for a number of weeks and so the doctors in Paris agreed that we should try for just one transfusion per week 😳. The injection to boost my white blood cells is to be stopped as it looks as if my body is working better there. I still have to have the injection for red blood cells but haven’t had a haemoglobin transfusion for almost two weeks 😁 and of course I am still having platelet injections and transfusions. My blood pressure tablets have been stopped completely in the hope that blood pressure will return to normal levels after being really low. All in all a “good news” week. Keep your 🤞for me.

I had to eke out the shopping as Monique wanted to do some, I asked Anie to get fresh fruit and my neighbour to go for my prescription. On Friday (after my trip to Paris) my neighbour drove me to two supermarkets, where I hurried round picking up items for “my family’s” arrival. We are all so excited to be seeing one another soon.

It has been another busy week (well aren’t they all?) I messaged the gardener, who came out and cut the grass on Tuesday, then he messaged to say he would cut the hedges on Friday, so now my garden looks pretty good. I contacted the plumber who also called in on Tuesday and repaired the waste “thing” in the upstairs washbasin. I finally plucked up courage to contact the man to clean the outside walls of the house, they are streaked with red which appears to come from the roof tiles. He came out and looked at them, gave me a price which we agreed and then we agreed a start date. The only person, both Monique and I, have been unable to contact is the roofer. He seems to have gone to ground! She said I will have to try and find another man to do the work but to be honest those men are as rare as hens teeth! Oh well, it’s just one job left to do I suppose.

It was pay day for my cleaner and as usual, I hadn’t done something correctly! I finally printed off the paper she needed, at 5am on Friday (before my trip to Paris), left it where I had said I would leave it and she hasn’t been for it yet. Oh well I have done my bit, without my car I cannot go and deliver it to her. If Anie comes down I will get her to take it but other than that, I don’t know.

Pauline came to see me on Tuesday and we spent a lovely couple of hours together. She was quite taken by the gardener and kept “watching him work”.

I had a surprise yesterday, my friend, from the next village, sent a message to say she had left something outside my front door. Sure enough, a bunch of flowers were resting on the door handle and there was a large bag of tomatoes and courgettes. As it was so hot, I really couldn’t face cooking anything but I checked out some recipes and think I will be making tomato and courgette soup plus courgettes, tomato and garlic. Well I can but try!

We have had some really lovely days and I am hoping for more of these for next week. This week it has meant that washing could be hung out and dried which is a big boost enabling me to prepare for the autumn and winter.

If it’s good weather next week my visitors will be in the garden taking the sun and reading books. The perfect way to de-stress.

So “Mr Solicitor” and “The Recovery Coordinator” have been busy packing their bags and will spend today relaxing 🤞before an early start in the morning. Oh wow, don’t think about it or I will get 🤪.

“The Photographer” has been out and about in York taking photos. He is trying lots of different things and ways to photograph scenes, people etc. He made a flying visit home yesterday and will be heading back to York this evening.

On Friday morning the alarm woke me at 4:30a.m. it was dark and I felt as if it was still nighttime! I love the summer for the bright early mornings but know that those days will soon give way to darker mornings. It’s sad in a way but at least I have my trusty sunrise alarm clock to help me wake up to some light. When I was younger I wished I could hibernate until the days grew longer, now as I approach another birthday I want to make the most of the hours available to me, be they light or dark. Yes it’s the month of the autumnal equinox too!

So finally, I have reached the music slot, I don’t know why I haven’t had this song in before now! The song is “Play That Funky Music” by Wild Cherry which was released in 1976.

This is another 1970’s song, it’s “Black Betty” by Ram Jam which was released in 1977. When I hear either of these songs I am transported poolside at the Hotel Tour Khalef in Sousse Tunisia. I was young and free as a bird unlike now where I am old but still free as a bird 😂.

Have a good week until next week, I hope to.

Final photo, the garden, ready for the visitors.

[aria-ashryver]

🌟...aaaaand it's over, no more chemo!🌟

(at least I very much hope so 🤞)

And Caesar, well...

How are you feeling, Aria? When are you getting new scans? Should the side effects go away soon? If they schedule a surgery, when will it happen?

(Also, this is how I picture you getting ready to hear the results of said scans)

♥️🎉🫂🥂

HELLO sweet lovely!!

Thoughts under the cut bc I'm getting a little bleak and edgy for a sec here lmao, but out here, lemme just say:

FUCK YEEEEEEEEEEAHHHHH I DID THAT!!!! 🙌✨🎉💪

I meet with my oncologist next week, so I won't know much more until then (he'll hopefully be telling me I can make an appointment with the surgery team to talk surgery plans!!), but whatever the news is, bring it on. I've got this.

y'know, these last 3 months have really felt like...

but you know what? I'm still here. Still standing. Still got my foot on Caesar's throat.

These past couple days I've been... ugh. I want to keep matching the celebratory energy, I really do. But I am standing on a bloodied battlefield, gasping for air, my darling.

Shortly before noon, May 30th, 2023, I was told my cancer was metastatic.

Advanced.

Secondary.

Stage 4.

Incurable.

I've been carrying that knowledge for a few months now. About 114,000 minutes, actually. And I've been cutting down the intrusive thoughts that whole time. The terror. The doubt. The sheer, stark loneliness that is existing in a body with something insidious that's trying to kill you. I cannot tell you how truly claustrophobic cancer is.

I've won this battle, yes. I made it through my chemotherapy. But I'm going to be sword in hand for the rest of my life. I don't get to rest. And you know what? That's okay. In a lot of ways, I've been fighting for years.

The irony isn't lost on me that I fought tooth and nail to claw my way through depression and suicidal ideation, and now that I finally, wholeheartedly want to live, I get handed a death sentence. One I can beat back, yes (see: bloodied battlefield, foot on Caesar's throat, et cetera), but one that I'll have to continue fighting forever.

I'll be honest, I have more flavours of trauma than a goddamn ice cream parlour, I was wholeheartedly fucked up even before the cancer diagnosis lmao. But NOTHING has broken me yet.

The world has been trying to kill me for decades and I haven't let it.

Caesar is just one more enemy to laugh at.

This battlefield may be bloodied and barren, but it is mine.

I may be standing on a field of broken bones and corpses, but I am standing.

So, here's to the next fight. I'm ready 🖤

also, just as a random parting thought, I was having a massive cry yesterday (again 114,000 minutes!! of being forced to confront my own mortality, and this was only Breakdown #5 (yes, I'm counting), so like... I think I'm doing real good haha). Anyway, I stumbled on a YT short that was so bleakly hilarious to me in the context of having cancer that I laughed so hard it snapped me right the fuck out of it and i stopped being sad and resumed being awesome

the tl;dr is hell yeah chemo is over (hopefully), and I am literally unkillable and feeling very cool and rad about it 💅

also now I want a sword.

oh my god i totally need to buy myself a sword when they declare my body cancer free don't i?

...oh my god im gonna do it

kitty you genius