#let that last bit sink in before you come for me
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fyoxi · 1 day ago
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୨ৎ 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓲𝓷𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓪𝓬𝔂 𝓸𝓯 𝓫𝓮𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓾𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓻𝓼𝓽𝓸𝓸𝓭 . . . ft. boothill
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boothill x f! reader. established relationship (but still new). nonsexual intimacy. petnames.
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boothill visits you a lot, knocking on the door to your apartment at least two or three times a week. sometimes he stays a few hours, sometimes he stays the night. it just depends really. but he always comes. and he always comes with a gift, a little stuffed animal, or a single flower he picked on his walk to your place. but it's always something. he made you smile, and that's all he wanted.
he had come to your apartment later in the evening this time. not being able to make it until well after sundown. he was honestly surprised when you opened the door for him, he had expected you to be in bed by now. but your door opened, and there you were, standing in the doorway, the light from the entryway behind you made you look like some kind of angel to him.
"well, hello there, pretty girl," he said. he couldn't help the silly grin across his face. "i got this for you" he held out a single premature dandelion.
"thank you," you smiled back at him, taking the bright yellow flower from his hand, and stepping to the side to let him in.
once the door closed behind him, and he hung his hat on the coat rack on the wall. he reached out to you, fingers curling around your hips to pull your body to him. "i missed you" he mumbled into your hair, before resting his chin on the top of your head.
"i missed you too—" your response was cut short by an absolutely awful smell. you took a breath in through your nose, trying to locate where the smell was coming from. "oh, goodness boothill ! when was the last time you washed your hair ?!"
boothill looked down at you, his brow raised, he seemed confused. "i dunno" he shrugged, "how often am i supposed to ?"
"more than you have been, clearly !" you exclaimed
"is it really that bad ?" boothill asked. he seemed genuinely confused. like he didn't smell the near nauseating scent coming off his hair.
you nodded your head, "come here" you said with a little sigh, walking into the kitchen, dragging a chair from the dining room table up to the sink. "take your jacket off and sit down here" you said, it came out more like an order than you intended it to. but boothill didn't seem to mind, he kicked his boots off, leaving them by the front door, he knew you didn't like outside shoes on your carpet, and shrugged his jacket off, hanging it up on the coat rack with his hat.
he followed you into your kitchen, sitting himself down on the dining chair you brought over to the sink. he watched from the spot as you put the flower he got you between the pages of a heavy cookbook, pressing it down like you did all the flowers he got you. you left the room for a second, and returned with a towel over your arm, and a bottle of shampoo and conditioner in your hands.
"what's that for ?" he asked, nodding to the toiletries in your hand
"you" you answered, setting them down next to the sink, "i'm gonna wash your hair"
boothill's brow raised, just for a second before he shrugged his shoulders "alright" he said "just be careful with it, took a lot of work to grow all this out. and don't get any soap in my eyes"
"i'll do my best" you reassured him with a little chuckle, wrapping the towel around his shoulders, securing it with a hair tie.
boothill watched your hands as you tied the towel in place, it was made of a fuzzy cotton material, warm and soft against the back of his neck. "so, what do you want me to do ?" he asked
"just lean back, relax. i got it" you tilted his head back, he had to slouch in the chair quite a bit for his head to be where you needed it, but it wasn't too uncomfortable. it wasn't like his body could get sore.
you gathered all of his hair, and pulled it over the edge of the kitchen sink, the black and white strands pooling against the stainless steel. you turned the water on, waiting for it to get to a comfortable warmth before using the attachment next to the faucet to spray his hair.
using your free hand to undo any tangles, you made sure every strand of his head was thoroughly soaked before setting the attachment back in its place, and reaching for the shampoo. "the only shampoo i have here is mine" you said, squeezing a generous amount directly onto his scalp "so you're gonna smell like me"
"that's okay," boothill hummed, "you smell good" his eyes were closed, his shoulders were back, his breath slow and heavy, a subtle smile etched on his lips.
you nodded, smiling down at him. "alright" you said softly. you used both hands to rub the soap into his hair, pads of your fingers gently massaging it into his scalp, making careful work to coat every inch of it in the sweet smelling suds. boothill's head twitched, a little laugh escaping him as you moved to scrub behind his ears. you pulled your hands away, "are you okay ?" you asked
boothill nodded "perfect, darlin'," he answered "just tickled"
you nodded again, going back to your work. boothill's mouth was shut tightly, pressing his lips together hard to keep from laughing as your fingers scrubbed behind his ears.
once his scalp was fully coated and scrubbed, you ran your fingers down the length of his hair, coating it too with the soap, until the entirety of his hair was covered in a thick lather. "i'm gonna rinse it out now," you told him, receiving only a tiny, slow nod in response.
you put your hand on his forehead, holding it up like a mini wall to keep the soapy water from his eyes as you used the sink's spray attachment once again to rinse the soap out of his hair. you were extra attentive, making sure you got every last bit of the soap out of his hair, as leaving any behind would make this whole process pointless.
boothill was completely sill, his face and body were relaxed, legs spread, his feet flat on the ground. he wasn't bouncing his leg, or tapping his fingers on his thigh. which is usually what he'd be doing anytime he had to sit still for anything.
when the soap was rinsed from his hair, you grabbed the bottle of conditioner, and squeezed about a quarter sized amount on your palm, and ran it through the ends of his hair, careful not to get any on his scalp. "it has to sit for a little bit" you said, rinsing any of the left over residue from your hands.
there was no response, not even a hum or a nod, from boothill. "boots ?" you asked. there was still nothing. you looked over his face, there was no sign that he had heard you at all, not even in the tiniest twitch in his face. now that the water was off, and you weren't so focused on his hair, you could hear the quiet snores coming from him. "oh" you whispered, realizing only now that at some point during the process of washing his hair, he had been lulled to sleep.
you leaned down, brushing your lips ever so gently on his forehead, leaving a feather light kiss on his skin. the rancid smell he'd come into your apartment with now replaced with a sweet floral scent, mixed with subtle hints of vanilla and fresh cotton. you spoke in a hushed whisper, cautious to not wake up, saying out loud for the first time; "i love you, boothill"
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domm1etae · 11 hours ago
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Kneeling for a Taste
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yunho x f!reader
oneshot | mdni
1.7k
Watching a movie with Yunho turns into anything but cinematic as he loses focus on the screen, transfixed by the sight of your thighs until he can’t hold back anymore
nsfw tags under
m/f, submissive yunho, thigh kink, begging, oral sex (female receiving), passionate, praise, needy/soft dom and more:)))
author's note: you guessed it right! today’s fic is yunho x reader—oh, specifically subby yunho because OH MY LAAAWD! this idea came to me on the bus today, and don’t tell me this isn’t something yunho would do.
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The soft glow of the TV screen cast faint shadows across the room as you both settled into the couch. It had been a long week, and a cozy night watching a movie together was the perfect way to wind down. Yunho had chosen the film, something he swore you’d love, but as the scenes played out on screen, his focus began to waver.
At first, he tried to keep his eyes on the screen, but the gentle curve of your thigh, peeking out from beneath the hem of your skirt, kept pulling his gaze. Your legs were crossed, your knee bouncing slightly as you got into the storyline, completely unaware of his growing distraction. The skirt you wore rode up just enough for him to catch the barest hint of the skin above your thigh, each movement a gentle torture as he tried to focus.
Yunho swallowed hard, his eyes tracing the way your thigh pressed against the cushion, his heart starting to race. He’d seen you in skirts before, but tonight, there was something so effortlessly tempting about you. His mind drifted, a warm tingle spreading across his skin, slowly pooling in his lap. He shifted uncomfortably, trying to refocus, but his gaze would flicker back every few seconds, his resolve weakening.
As the minutes passed, his breathing became shallower. He felt himself growing hard, the fabric of his pants suddenly feeling too tight, pressing uncomfortably against his swelling arousal. Each time you shifted, his eyes darted back to the curve of your thighs, the urge to touch you building within him.
At last, unable to resist any longer, Yunho turned toward you, his voice soft and hesitant. "Y/N…"
You looked at him, slightly surprised, but his gaze was unmistakable. His eyes lingered on your legs, his lips parted as though he was on the verge of saying something but couldn't quite bring himself to do it. The sight of his flushed cheeks and the way he shifted, almost nervously, sparked a thrill of curiosity within you.
"What's wrong, Yunho?" you asked, leaning slightly closer.
He swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing as he tried to find the right words. His gaze dropped to your lap again, and he bit his lip, hesitant. "I just… I can't stop looking at you." His voice was barely a whisper, laced with longing.
Your eyes softened, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips as you saw the heat in his gaze. You uncrossed your legs, letting the skirt rise just a bit higher, teasing him. His breath hitched, his cheeks turning an even deeper shade of red.
He reached out, his fingers trembling as they brushed against your thigh, his touch gentle and reverent. His hand lingered there, the warmth of your skin against his palm only stoking the fire that was quickly consuming him. His gaze shifted up to meet yours, a silent plea in his eyes.
"Yunho…" You let his name hang in the air, watching the way he reacted to the softness of your tone. His eyes widened slightly, a shiver running through him as he glanced back down, almost ashamed of his own desire.
"Please, Y/N," he whispered, his voice strained with need. His fingers tightened slightly on your thigh as he began to sink to his knees in front of you, his breaths coming faster, more ragged. He looked up at you, eyes full of desperation, his lips parting as he struggled to hold himself back.
"I want you," he murmured, his voice thick with longing. "Please… let me taste you."
The way he knelt before you, so vulnerable and eager, sent a thrill through you. You gently ran your fingers through his hair, letting him feel the weight of your touch as you cupped his face. He leaned into your hand, his eyes closing briefly as he savored the warmth of your skin against his cheek.
"Are you sure you want this, Yunho?" you asked, a hint of teasing in your voice.
He nodded quickly, his gaze intense as he met your eyes once more. "More than anything," he whispered, his voice trembling with need. "Please…"
Yunho’s eyes darted between your face and the bare skin of your thigh, his expression one of unfiltered longing as he waited for your permission. You held his gaze for a moment longer, then shifted, parting your legs just enough for him to see the space between them. His breath hitched as he moved forward, his hands gripping your thighs reverently, his eyes shining with gratitude and desire.
As he lowered his mouth to you, his lips pressing gentle kisses along the inside of your thigh, each touch was tender, deliberate, and filled with the adoration he felt.
Yunho’s breath was hot against your skin as he leaned in, his lips tracing a path along the soft, sensitive flesh of your inner thigh. Every kiss, every whisper of his breath sent waves of anticipation rushing through you, heightening your senses. His hands, still trembling slightly, slid up your thighs, thumbs pressing into the tender muscle as he held you, grounding himself in your warmth. You could feel his need in the way his fingers tightened, as though he feared you might slip away if he didn’t keep you close.
He looked up at you through half-lidded eyes, his lips slightly parted, breathing in the scent of your arousal as he pressed a slow, open-mouthed kiss at the edge of your thigh. His expression was dazed, almost reverent, as if he were worshipping you with each kiss, each gentle caress. There was a slight, breathless sound that left his lips as he brushed them closer to your center, a sound somewhere between a moan and a sigh, as though he couldn’t believe he was finally here.
“Y/N…” he whispered softly against your skin, his voice so full of longing it sent a shiver down your spine. “You’re… perfect.”
You threaded your fingers through his hair, pulling him just a little closer. The encouragement seemed to break his last thread of self-restraint; he dove forward, letting his mouth finally meet your heat. His tongue traced a slow, deliberate path up your folds, the wet warmth of it making you gasp as he savored every inch of you. He explored slowly, languidly, as if committing each taste, each texture to memory.
“God, you taste so good…” he murmured between kisses, his words muffled but full of awe. He buried his face deeper, his tongue circling and flicking over you with increasing fervor, his hands gripping your thighs firmly to keep you exactly where he wanted you. His movements were needy, almost desperate, yet there was a surprising gentleness in the way he held you, as though he wanted to show you just how much you meant to him with every flick of his tongue, every breathless kiss.
You couldn’t hold back the sounds spilling from your lips as he continued, your hands clutching at his hair, tugging him closer. He responded eagerly, moaning softly against you, the vibrations sending ripples of pleasure through your body. His tongue delved deeper, his lips sealing around the sensitive bundle of nerves, sucking gently as he looked up at you, eyes dark with desire.
“Please,” he whispered hoarsely, pausing just long enough to catch his breath, “let me make you feel good… I need to—” His voice was cut off as he dove back in, pressing himself harder against you, as if your pleasure was the only thing that mattered. His eyes closed, his lashes fluttering as he lost himself in the taste of you, every stroke of his tongue bringing you closer to the edge.
Yunho’s hands slid up your thighs again, his fingers spreading you open for him, giving him better access as he nuzzled in deeper, licking and sucking with increasing fervor. His tongue moved expertly, his eagerness making each touch feel electrifying. Just when you thought you couldn’t handle any more, he pulled back slightly, his lips wet and his cheeks flushed, looking up at you with a dazed expression.
“You’re everything I want,” he whispered, the words tumbling out between ragged breaths. His gaze was filled with pure adoration as he lowered his mouth to you again, this time moving with even more focus, his tongue and lips working together to draw out every ounce of pleasure he could.
Your moans filled the room as he quickened his pace, his hands gripping your thighs possessively. His desperation, his absolute devotion to pleasing you, was enough to push you over the edge. You felt your muscles tightening, the wave of pleasure building rapidly, threatening to consume you.
Sensing how close you were, Yunho moaned softly against you, his voice shaking with excitement. “Come for me,” he whispered, his lips brushing against you as he spoke, each word sending sparks through your body. “Please… let me feel it.”
And with that, the coil of pleasure inside you snapped, a blissful wave washing over you as you cried out his name, your body shaking beneath his touch. Yunho held you steady, his mouth not leaving you even for a second as he eagerly worked you through your climax, his tongue gentle but insistent, savoring every bit of your release. He moaned as he felt you pulse against his tongue, the taste of you sending shivers through him as he held you close, his own breathing unsteady.
As you slowly came back down from the high, Yunho stayed there, his head resting against your thigh, his lips pressing gentle kisses along your skin as though he couldn’t bear to part from you. His gaze was soft, filled with adoration, his cheeks flushed and his lips swollen from the intensity of his efforts.
He looked up at you, a shy smile playing on his lips as he took in the satisfied expression on your face. “Did… did I do okay?” he asked softly, his voice still breathless, but his eyes shining with pride at having made you feel so good.
You leaned down, pressing a kiss to his forehead, letting him feel your gratitude in that simple gesture. “More than okay,” you murmured, your fingers running through his hair tenderly.
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kryptznnn · 1 day ago
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♛- It's Just Business
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➸ INTERESTS; -normal au! toji fushiguro x f!reader
➸ BACKGROUND; -just a drabble on toji being one of your fathers closest (and possibly youngest) friends and the two of you just can't seem to leave one another. You both knew it was wrong; you were a college student, and he was damn near pushing mid fourties, even if he tried to convince himself it was just business.
➸ WARNINGS; - wc.1.4k, romantic tension, sexual tension, large age gap (Toji is 43 and reader is 21), smut, p in v, mentions of breeding, kissing, marking, sexual ties, dad's bsf trope, fingering, orgasm f!recieving, secrecy, flirting, subtle touches, romantic and sexual build up, etc.
➸a.i; - omg new drabble, crazy working i know idk whats wrong w me but i had the urge to write this. enjoy!! im also working on my jjk masterlist so that should be out soon, trying to clear my drafts. xoxo.
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Toji Fushiguro knew you just as well as you did him, well only through the relations of your dad. The two of them were close as well as you had known, like rushing to give your dad the phone whenever he called kind of close.
Inviting him and his son over to eat dinner with your family kind of close. Birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, all of it, you hadn’t gone a full month without seeing him at least once with your dad. It was common for the two of you however to exchange small conversation, glances, and touches with one another, the tension and flirtatious air between the two of you never going unmissed.
So, it wasn’t any surprise when you had a week off after taking midterms to return home and to find no one there. Only to contact your parents to find out they had an emergency to take care of out of country, leaving you home alone. Well not entirely, your dad had told Toji about it, and he offered to help out, as the last thing your parents wanted was for you to be alone.
Your father was grateful to say the least, repeatedly thanking him for his kindness and even offered to pay him since it was a long period of time. He had done it before, babysitting you when you were within your mid to late teens, this would’ve been easy. A week alone with you gave him chills as he kept a grin plastered on his face. He hadn't liked this side of him, he felt a tad bit like a perv, but it didn't seem like he was the only one trying to grab at the others attention.
His eyes widened at you as you opened the door for him, letting him inside as you were barely dressed properly. Your top was tight in contrast to your bottoms, just barely loose, keeping his eye on your figure as he made his way inside, two bags in hand. The scent of that strong pheromone scented perfume you'd wear had his cock twitch slightly in his pants.
He hated that perfume, and you only wore it whenever you knew he was coming around. He was hooked on it as if it was a drug, and honestly had even masturbated to you before as he caught the scent around his bedroom from your last visit with your family. The top you had worn wasn't helping his case either.
Scratch that, your top was tight how you liked it and he loved it, and you only kept a smirk on your face as you watched him swallow, hard. Keeping pointers on how his Adams apple bobbed up and down when he did.
You greeted him with a smile as you shut the door behind him, locking it quickly. He thought to himself as he took in your outfit before making his way to the guest room he’s been in before. Placing his bags down as you disappeared from behind him.
A crop top he thought, although this one was different, very different. It looked almost like a bikini top the way it squeezed you, as if it was a dry sponge and you were an entire ocean letting it sink in. Maybe it was a bikini top, some kind of new fashion trend with shorter tops and baggy shorts that he was behind on, he hadn’t known.
What he did know is that what you were doing was wrong, the both of you knew it was wrong, frankly you just didn't care. You had always been bold and persistent, so when you saw his entire body react to you mentioning the boys from college and randoms that would try to hit on you when you went out with friends you took it as an opportunity.
It was something he was never able to wrap his head around, how he felt for you was wrong, but he couldn't help what his body craved. He was pushing mid 40's and you were only 21, you were around the same age as his so. Well, not technically, you two shared an age gap for 3 years but the gap between the two of you hadn't compared between Toji's age gap with yours.
He was never short to compliment you and how you dressed. No matter what you wore it seemed to suit you, especially in the way he liked. Your dad had always teased him because he hadn't remarried after his last or even took on dating again, his eyes quickly met yours before he would turn back to your father and just laugh.
He was here because he cared about you and he cared about your father, he was a good friend and wanted to help out in any way possible. He was also being paid to be here, so it couldn't have been that bad and he couldn't complain. Just a simple week with you, he knew he could handle it, it couldn't be that hard.
Only that it was, and that he was too as you teased him, mewling softly as you had a hold of his cock, rubbing the tip against your core, arching your back slowly as it repeatedly hit your clit. You had already been overstimulated prior from him toying with you, fingering you as if you were just a doll, and he laughed at you.
You were laid out flat underneath him, your head perked up as your eyes followed your movements as he watched you. He doesn't even think he can remember how the two of you ended up in this state, both of you fully nude and your hair was draped out across his sheets.
He loved how you looked, and he loved the sounds you were making, only getting louder as he moved your hand to the side and pushed himself inside you. He quickly sunk down onto you, pressing his body weight into you as his arms caged your sides.
He nearly hissed at the feeling of you, his eyes pressed shut, tightly. You were too tight for comfort, or maybe he was getting old and hadn't had action in so long. You felt so good, better than he had imagined, if he hadn't known any better, he would've thought you were a virgin, even though you told him you weren't.
Now he remembers how things came into play; you came into his room to watch a movie. The entire time for nearly an hour the two of you were exchanging glances and subtle touches in places where your hands shouldn't have been. You kissed him, locking your legs around his waist and your arms around his shoulders, until the situation had escalated to where the two of you were now.
You loved how he pistoled into you; he was fucking you as if he was starving and greedy. It drove you absolutely insane, unable to keep yourself quiet as he spoke dirty to you. You knew this was wrong, fucking around with your dad's close friend, if not best friend, but honestly it felt so good.
"This what you wanted? Wanted your dad's best friend to give you a good fuckin'? Hm?" He teased, whispering in your ear as your moans grew louder, humming and nodding to his phrase in response. You wrapped your legs around him yet again and clung to him like an animal, clinging on for dear life as you whined.
The movie was still playing in the background, but honestly neither of you were paying attention to it, if anything you were louder than the TV. His thrusts hadn't slowed down, he kept the same pace as he nipped and bit at your skin, not satisfied until his jaw had felt a little sore.
"Maybe if you're a good girl for me I'll fill you up. You'd like that wouldn't ya?" He said, his voice gruff and heavy as he grunted into you. You could only babble along, muttering 'yes, yes, yes' over and over again, pleading with him.
This was fine, he still had the situation under control, following his orders. You were well kept, under perfect care, and safe, so technically he wasn't going against your father's wishes, plus you were extra happy so that was a bonus.
It isn't anything personal, just adding on a little tip towards the payment your dad was planning to give him after finishing his 'babysitting'. He just had to keep convincing himself that this was all just business, so he didn't have his emotions or feelings for you thrown into the mix.
Yeah, it's just business.
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✴🕷 please do not copy, plagiarize, edit, or translate any works submitted by me. all works are originated and all other pictures used within those works are online images. thank you!! @kryptznnn
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ccazimi · 2 days ago
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Hiyahh saw that u said ur reqs are open my idea is pretty simple tbh but maybe could ya write sum abt sukuna lets reader bleach his hair to re-dye it but ends up failing horribly so he has to shave off his hair n he's js acting like a soggy cat 🫡
sorry if this didn't hit the mark! new to this haha
"I'm going to fucking kill you, woman."
You pouted from where you stood behind Sukuna as he scowled at his reflection in the mirror.
"Hey, it's not that bad..." You started nervously, trying to alleviate the situation you had created.
"Not that bad?!" Sukuna angrily interjected before you could even finish your sentence. "My head looks like an overused toothbrush."
And with uneven splotches of yellow, orange and white with short stiff strands that sat like straw after being freshly dried, the comparison was actually quite accurate. Accurate enough that you had to look away with a hand over your mouth to suppress a giggle.
"Are you laughing? Is you fucking up my hair funny to you?" He grit his teeth, irritation only growing at your tittering.
"No!" You squeaked, before stepping up to where he stood by the sink counter. "Is it really that fucked up?"
He watched you from the corners of his eyes as you lifted your hands to gently grasp a small tuft of hair sticking out. It was dry and brittle as though someone had air fried it for a bit too long. You tested its flexibility by bending it in your fingers and it gave way with a soft crunch leaving you staring at the dead hair between your fingers, and Sukuna stiffening even more. "Oh."
"Oh? Oh? Is that all you have to say for yourself?" You could practically see the steam exiting Sukuna's ears. "Give me that." He snatched the fossil of his once beautiful salmon colored hair that you'd collected and inspected it for himself. "How'd you even mess it up that bad? Were you using industrial bleach or something?"
"I don't know, I just used the old bottle of bleach I found under the sink." You mumbled. "The 'forty' brand."
"Forty?"
"It had the number forty on it."
He spun around at looked down at you incredulously, making you furrow your brows. "What, is that a bad brand or something?"
He brought his palm to his face, closing his eyes as another growl escaped his throat. "That wasn't the name of the brand, you idiot. 'Forty' is the level of the bleach"
You kept your mouth shut as he seemed to only become more livid.
"They come in volumes from weakest to strongest: ten, twenty, thirty, and forty."
He opened his eyes to glare down at you, leaving you to marinate in your guilt and feeling dumb as hell. "I'm sorry, Sukuna. Listen, I'll pay for you to get it fixed at the salon-"
He dismissed your attempts at reparation with a wave of his hand, holding up the tuft of broken hair up to your face. "You see this? There's nothing any professional can do when your hair is fucked this bad. I'm going to have to buzz it."
He watched you drop your gaze trying to hide the growing pout on your lips. Honestly, you'd really liked his hair too.
With an exasperated sigh he decided to take pity on you, trying to make you feel better in his own way. "Its fine, I'll just shave it so that it grows back fresh. Also I am never letting you near my hair again."
"Do you need any help buzzing it?"
He shot you a death glare that had you scrambling to exit the bathroom as quickly as possible.
You were laying on the couch, reading a book with Yuuji curled up on your lap when you heard the door to the bathroom open. The last few minutes were marked by the buzzing of an electric razor and you snapped your head up as Sukuna finally revealed himself to you.
He stared at you silently with his arms crossed, waiting for your commentary. "Well?"
Your first thought was that he reminded you of a lion that had its majestic mane shaven off - more so due to his demeanor rather than his appearance.
As for his appearance...
"You know I actually like the look." You said with a genuine smile. His chiseled features and sharp inky tattoos gave his face enough structure that he could actually pull off the buzzed look.
He deadpanned you, clearly skeptical of your approval.
"Look Yuuji, doesn't he look handsome?" You scratched the golden retriever's ears, prompting him to look up. Although Sukuna supposedly didn't like the puppy, Yuuji absolutely adored Sukuna from the moment he'd met him and would routinely piss himself in excitement whenever Sukuna would visit (much to Sukuna's disgust).
But Yuuji caught sight of Sukuna and growled, before laying his head back down.
You might have never seen Sukuna look so genuinely offended in his life.
"Don't mind him, he probably just needs to get a little used to your...new look." You tried to reassure Sukuna, but could barely contain your laughter at what a dirty scowl he was giving the dog.
"Let's go out for dinner tonight."
"No."
You sighed, dramatically throwing yourself on Sukuna's lap where he sat on the couch snacking on chicken katsu. "Come on, how long are you gonna keep sulking over this?"
He grabbed a pillow to throw it over your face and kept eating. "I am not sulking." He grumbled.
You fought against the pillow, finally managing to get it off and grin cheekily up at him. "You so are. Seriously, it doesn't look bad."
For the past few days Sukuna had refused to go outside, slinking around the apartment like a wet cat. His pride, his joy, his beautiful hair that he normally only trusted with high end salons had fallen at your hands, and he refused to let it go.
"Look even Yuuji's warmed up to you again."
Upon hearing his name, Yuuji got up from where he was slobbering on a chew toy and nosed Sukuna's ankle, tail wagging back and forth like a propeller. Your dog wasn't the smartest and it took him a little to be convinced that Sukuna was still his grumpy self and not some hairless replacement.
"Tsk. I don't care about your rat dog - in fact i'd rather have it not be all over me."
You chose to not mention it, knowing damn well Sukuna had perked up if even a bit when Yuuji went back to fawning over him. Instead you sat up, cozying yourself on Sukuna's lap in that way that you knew would always grab his attention.
"I'm seriously sorry I messed up your hair, okay? And you know I find you sexy with or without your pretty hair. So lets go out so I can show off to everyone how attractive my boyfriend is." You teased him on purpose, knowing that his ego would take some coddling while his hair grew back.
He rolled his eyes but you knew you were getting somewhere when he set his food down to snake his hands around your waist. "Fine. But only if we get sashimi."
"Yes!" You chirped. "Sounds good to me." You raised a hand to pet his head but he caught your wrist before you could feel his buzzed scalp under your fingertips.
"You're still not allowed to touch my hair, though."
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trendywaifus · 7 hours ago
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↳ you know you’re better than this.
featuring — anya x gn! reader (mouthwashing)
no, i don’t write for mouthwashing, there’s just not any anya content.
cw: dark themes, mentions of sexual abuse, abuse, mentions of pregnancy, vomiting, blood, implications of suicide, character deaths, controlling behavior, triggering themes, angst, panic attack, reader is fresh out of medical school, barely hurt and comfort
6 weeks before the crash.
“ guess who~? “
you croon, playfully hovering your hands over the onyx haired woman’s eyes as you snuck up behind her in the med room. anya was standing in front of the sink, quietly washing her hands. a soft giggle rolls off her smiling lips, body language relaxed,
“ hmm, daisuke?”
you snicker, “ i didn’t know i was a silly boy.”
anya hums thoughtfully while the faucet still runs and her hands soaking wet. “ captain? “
“ yes it is i, the big softie blond with curls! “ you proclaimed, goofily deepening your voice to make the voice of the captain, curly. if curly was here, he definitely would of made fun of your half-baked impression of him. anya lets out a bubbly laugh that makes the corner of your lips curl upwards even more. you fight the urge to hug her from behind and squeeze her silly from how wondrous she is. to think you get to be on a space trip with the woman you love and admire deeply makes you wanna float through the endlessly sea of stars and wonder.
“ now that I guessed you right, can i finish washing my hands and greet my lover properly? “ anya asks in a jovial tone.
“ mhmm~ “ you removed your hands away from her eyes and backed off so she can finish washing her hands. it takes a few moments for anya to finish. she turns the faucet off, grabs a paper towel from the dispenser, and wipes her hands off. after throwing the crumbled paper towel in the small bin, she turns around to finally face you. despite her hues resembling a gloomy grey, they brighten as they drink you in. anya immediately seeks for you, wrapping her arms around your frame and gently brushes up against you. you gladly reciprocate the loving gesture, running a delicate up her back and let it rest on her upper back.
“ so, how’s evaluations going three months in? “ you asked, pressing a quick kiss to her brow, “ has the others evaluations been okay? no crazy confessions yet right? “ you inquired with a teasing voice. anya is far experienced in psychology than you are so you leave the evaluations to her. and because anya’s more outgoing and hands-on, you felt like anya’s more capable of taking on medic role. you were luckily squeezed on this ship as a last minute intern similar to daisuke for the experience. six people on a four-man ship is so far quite the experience. you try not to get in the way of the others and besides anya, you mostly interact with curly and daisuke.
anya pauses, recalling her memories from the monthly evaluations.
“ hm. .—oh! daisuke. .a very bright and funny boy that really puts himself out there. he inspires me to be more optimistic. ugh, he’s also disgustingly lucky when it comes to those board games we play. “ her lips ball up in a cute pout, you laugh, “
“ stop saying he’s lucky, anya. you’re just being a sore loser. just accept that he’s better than you at board games! “
anya playfully rolls her eyes, “ oh hush. don’t tell me you’re on his side. “
you smirked, “ i’m on your side, beautiful—buttt i’m still gonna hand you the truth. lovingly. “
anya tells you about the other three evaluations, curly, swansea, and jimmy. her voice is light-hearted when she talks about curly. she describes him as being kind but a bit reserved. he never talks much about himself. everyone has their own story and perhaps even some like him chooses to not tell his as it’s locked away behind the fleshy walls of his bleeding heart. when anya got to swansea, her tone is the same but it’s dampens a bit; melancholic. she describes the crude mechanic as a man who’s been through a lot in life and still lives on despite his struggles. despite how rough he acts, there’s something about him that makes you feel sorry for him. there’s a sort of loneliness that clings to him like the fresh scent of dry balls after drying your clothes in a dryer. however, you can tell that daisuke’s light is smearing onto the much older man’s demeanor. he’s a little more livelier, although very rough on the edges—swansea expresses his care for daisuke in a tough love kinda way.
when anya finally gets to the gruff brunette man, the atmosphere shifts. her words holds a certain weight to them that makes you feel slightly uncomfortable. her voice is meek and reluctant as she talks about his recent evaluation. you pick up on anya’s careful wording and brief pauses during it. she rests her cheek against your shoulder, holding you visibly tighter as if she’s trying to ground herself through you. anya says that he doesn’t really take his evaluation seriously and makes particularly sarcastic comments at her. great. you don’t like jimmy because there’s something about him that rubs you the wrong way. was it that permanent mean look on his face? that judgmental look in his hooded, brown eyes whenever he passes by you in the hallways? what could have you possibly done to him to make him look at you like that? you don’t really talk to him and care more for curly. he is the leader and main pilot after all.
“ . .if he’s making you uncomfortable, i can do his evaluations for you. psychological evaluations require a one on one session and i can do it while you’re outside of the door.” you mutter, rubbing loose circles into anya’s back.
your lover stays silent for a moment. “ . . .no, i can handle it. but, you standing behind the door instead puts me a little more at ease though, haha. “
“ of course. anya, look at me. “ and she does, pulling her head away to peer at you with those pretty, upturned eyes of hers. a tender palm cups her cheek. anya’s skin feels warm and soft to the touch. “ if anything happens, you’ll tell me right? i may only be the intern but i will absolutely raise hell for you. “
anya smiles at you warmly at you, grayish eyes twinkling with endearment. she leans in and kisses your lips. “ i prefer that you not to because i’d hate for you to get booted into space by the crew. “ she remarks jokingly in between brief kisses.
“ hmm. “ you bring your lips to the bridge of her nose, under the tender flesh of her eye, everywhere until she’s a smiling mess. “ we’ll have to see about that. “
5 weeks before the crash.
restless, you exhale as you blankly stare at the white ceiling. due to anya’s head laying on your chest and her body nuzzled against your side, you can hardly change positions or get up, really. you don’t want to wake her up either.
“ can’t sleep? “ she whispers out gently, her hand that was intertwined with yours, lightly squeezed.
“ mmm, not really. did i wake you up with my defeated sighs, anya? “
“ . . kinda. but i’m use to this by now since this is a habit you like to do when you can’t sleep, (name).”you can hear the fond smile in her voice. after two years of dating, anya’s able to read and soak up your habits. she’s so attentive to your mannerisms, knows when you’re apprehensive by the twitching of your fingers and eyes. she knows when you’re happy, sad—it’s quite ridiculous how could someone so knowledgeable like her is struggling to get accepted to med school several times while it only took you once to get in. you’re not a registered nurse prior to getting into med school or anything like that. yes, you worked really hard—but lets admit it; you were just simply lucky to get in. lucky and currently hundred thousand dollars in debt after finishing.
“ i’ll let you sleep. i think i will just sneak into med bay to finish reading the social animal. i wanna be good at psychology as my awesome, future wife is.” you asked, pressing a chaste kiss on her temple.
anya laughs sleepily, “ oh, stop it. you’re not going to fall asleep in there, are you? “
“ of course not! i’ll come back to you once i’m feeling tired. but, if you miss me or have a nightmare, you know where to find me~ “
she removes her head off your chest and breaks away from you with a soft pout. “ i suppose so. “
you get up from the bed and dipped down to kiss the tip of her pretty roman nose. “ buh bye for now, beautiful. ” you coo, adjusting the blanket back over her body.
“ see you, hun. “
you slip on your slippers and walked out of your shared cabin. besides the sound of the low humming noise of the ship, silence fills the void of the still atmosphere. it’s surprisingly chilly as you exit the sleeping quarters and walk through the narrow-like hallways to medical. your footsteps softly bounces throughout the metal walls and your distorted shadow follows behinds you. there’s a churning feeling in your gut as you walk and walk. was it really okay to skip off to medical at the middle of “night” just to read? wouldn’t it have suffice to simply stay and talk to anya until you were able to fall asleep?
your eye twitch and your fingers curl ever so slightly.
should you just go back to her?
“ hey, you’re still “up.”
a rough voice calls out, ripping you away from your thoughts. you stop walking. your eyes wander over to the source and a shiver runs down your spine. jimmy, still in his jumpsuit, stands by the hallway leading to the cockpit. there’s a sense of uneasiness in the air as his quiet gaze lingers on you, waiting for your response.
“ yeah, can’t sleep. “ you say in a deadpan voice, “ what about you? “
jimmy runs his fingers through his tousled chocolate locks before shrugging. “ same as you. but i’m just taking a aimless stroll. where you headin’ to? “
none of your business.
“ medical. “
there’s something in his eyes that visibly changes; a taunting glint that has you side-eyeing him. a corner of his thin lips curl into a subtle, smug smirk.
“ you’re a little ways to go, dr. intern. “
you roll your eyes and start walking pass him, “ i know. at least i know where to go, mr. co pilot. “
jimmy clicks his tongue behind you, muttering something under his breath before his footsteps become distant in your ears. you turn your head, throwing a quick glance over your shoulder. you see his tall silhouette walking down the direction towards the sleeping quarters. “ smug fuck, i hope you sleep like shit tonight. “ you murmur, trying your best to ignore the sinking feeling in your tummy.
with a tired sigh, you slumped in the chair, turning one of many pages you gone through. the ticking clock in the background occasionally hits your ears as your fingers lazily drum against the pristine white surface of the desk. your droopy (e/c) eyes skim across a quote that leaves the remainder of your conscious mind wondering.
reason and emotion are not separate and opposed. reason is nestled upon emotion and dependent upon it. emotion assigns value to things, and reason can only make choices on the basis of those valuations. the human mind can be pragmatic because deep down it is romantic.
“is it wrong to use only reasoning to make a decision devoid of emotion . .? or is it actually wrong to let your emotions influence your decisions and reasoning? ” you sleepily muse to yourself.
oh, being human is so complicated.
your head perk up at the medbay door sliding open. surprise is written all over your face once you see a seemingly shaken up anya walking inside. her arms are tucked to her chest, hands clutching her elbows.“ anya? it’s only been. .two hours? you had a nightmare already? “ you asked worriedly, standing up from the desk to make your way over to her.
“ i. .y-yes, it was t-terrible. .” anya whispers in a quivering voice. her head is down, avoiding eye contact. you try to grasp her elbow and lure her into your arms but she violently flinches from your touch.
pulling away quickly, your face contorts into a look of worry. “ baby? “
teary-eyed, anya quickly lifts up her head, mustering a shaky smile. “ oh dear, i-i’m sorry. i-i’m just still quite shaken up from the nightmare, h-haha. i need a minute or so to recoup myself. can i stay here with you? “ anya sometimes get nightmares but it was only due to stress. she never had a nightmare that got her like this.
“ . .of course. you don’t even have to ask. here, you can sit on one of those beds. “ carefully, you ghost your hand over the small of her back as you guide her to a bed. she quietly sits down with a soft sniffle and you follow suit. your heart squeezes at the sound of her soft hiccups and the sight of her head down. you can hardly see her face due to her saber strands hanging down. “ can. .is it safe for me to have my arm around you? “
she meekly bobs her head and you delicately curl an arm around her, taking note of her body momentarily stiffening up before gradually relaxing. “ do you want to talk about your nightmare? “
it takes her a moment to reply. “ . . no. i don’t really remember much of it now anyways. “
you frown, leaving it at that despite wanting to push for more. anya always remember her nightmares. there’s something that’s eating away at your gut and it’s making you anxious. you gnaw at your lip and your eyes twitch. you should be focusing on her. whatever you’re feeling right now is the result of your overthinking. you should trust her. it was just a rare, horrible nightmare that gotten her like this.
things can happen unexpectedly without an explanation.
perhaps you shouldn’t push for an answer and leave it alone?
1 week before the crash.
“ hah! i win! in your face! “ daisuke laughs in triumphant, placing his pink piece over on the next move that solidifies his victory. anya groans loudly next to you, crossing her arms and pouts like a kid who gotten their toy taken away. “ this is unbelievable! i almost had it! “
you laughed, “ better luck next time, anya. it seems like the kid has a brighter future than you when it comes to board games! “
ever since that night, anya’s been uncharacteristically a little distant and jumpy. she’d always seek for your touch. but now, she seems reluctant to touch you first. whenever you try to show anya any kind of affection, it takes her a moment to reciprocate. you can’t really surprise her now or she’ll get visibly startled. anya has trouble sleeping and wakes up from the any sound or movement so you have to be still. for the past four weeks, you tried to ask her about her abnormal behavior, and she’d tell you vague reasons like, “ i just haven’t been feeling well. “ or “ that nightmare got to me more than i thought, i’m sorry. “
you’re worried about her—even her smiles are dampened with a sliver of sadness behind them. you really want to help but you don’t know how. it feels like she’s slowly putting a wall between you, her, and her true feelings. at least right now she’s like her old self again. you’re glad.
“ hey guys. having fun in here, huh? “ curly and jimmy walks inside the lounge. the blond waves at the three of you with a welcoming smile while jimmy awkwardly stood behind him.
“ yeah! i was able to beat anya this time! isn’t that right, anya? “
“ mhm, but as usual, it was luck. “ anya says softly, her voice lacking the enthusiasm as it did before. she tucks her arms into her chest. you flash her a look of concern. there it is again, the churning feeling in your belly. why did her mood sour like that? was it because of curly and jimmy’s arrival? your eyes travel back to the two men, quietly observing them. curly ruffles daisuke’s hair as he stood behind the couch daisuke is sitting on. he’s completely focused on talking to daisuke. your gaze transition over to jimmy and his eyes meet with yours.
that same glint he had in his eyes a few weeks ago, has you feeling more than uneasy. then, your mind suddenly flashes back to the subtle smirk he had and him walking back to the direction of the sleeping quarters. not too long after him going over there and you lounging in medbay, anya joins you, trembling and barely wanting you to touch her. you thought about her saying it was a bad nightmare and didn’t remember enough to tell you the details of it. like what you thought about before, anya always remembers her nightmares and only gets them due to stress.
the horrible realization starts to sink in and your heart drops to the very pits of your stomach. it drowns in a sea of dread.
oh god, did he go to her while you were. . .?
you feel sick. why did you ignore that gut feeling in your stomach during your walk to medbay back then? why didn’t you stay with anya? why did you just figure this out now?
you stand up unexpectedly, startling everyone.
“ (name)? what’s the matter? “ anya asks with clear worry. throat dry, you gathered up the strength to cast her a assuring smile that doesn’t reach your eyes in which she notices right away.
“ i. .i need to go to the restroom. i’ll be back everyone. . “
you quickly slide the bathroom door behind you. unable to hold your own weight anymore, you fall to your knees. there’s a suffocating feeling in your chest that’s causing your breathing to become uneven. your mind races back to the evaluations and how uncomfortable anya looked every time she had to do jimmy’s. yes, you stood behind the door to provide her some “security��� in the recent weekly evaluations, but god, you actually let her be in the same room alone with this man? her assaulter? you did basically nothing but blindly trusted her words and ignored your intuition.
maybe anya didn’t want to tell you because she knew that you’d make a big uproar out of it, thus making the situation possibly even worse?
or maybe she was afraid you’d look at her differently?
. . .or maybe jim threatened her to not tell the crew?
t r u s t
she kept this in all this time and gave these inconsistent reasons that you knew was out of character for her to make up. . and yet. .you ignored the obvious signals and trusted her anyway. all you had to do was listen to your gut feeling and sit down with her to talk. all you had to say was that you were there for her and you’ll listen to anything she has to say if she wants to talk. you’d do anything for her—anything. even if it meant the cost of your internship which matters practically nothing to you. it’s not like the company was worth shit anyways. what fucking company doesn’t implement locks on doors in rooms where their own employees sleep in? what company just allows someone like him in?
tears bubble in your eyes as you grit your teeth, seething in frustration. you bite down on your bottom until the thin layer skin easily rips and starts to bleed. you bawl your hands into tight fists, nails dig into your palm until moon crescents dig into the flesh. you’re so horrible.
you feel so sick.
this is what she must of felt but much much worse.
you can’t even imagine how she had to process what happened all alone in the dark and walk through the long corridors in dead silence just to get to medbay, to you. you can’t imagine how it feels to hide something so traumatic from everyone while gathering up your broken shards of identity in silence. you don’t blame her—you can never blame her from hiding what happened between her and jimmy. you can only blame yourself for being ignorant and not fully realizing how dangerous he truly is.
your stomach turns upside down and you feel the sudden need to vomit. you scrambled over to the toilet and puke your guts out. series of fat tears roll down your cheeks.
“ ugh. .” you coughed hoarsely, hunched over.
you feel sick. you feel sick. you feel sick. you feel sick. you feel sick—
a few firm knocks on the bathroom door made you freeze.
anya’s concerned voice calls out behind the bathroom door. “ (name), are you alright? are you feeling well? “
you couldn’t even respond properly without hacking which gave yourself away immediately. alerted by your excessive coughing, she successfully slides the door open and rushes inside to your aid.
you never locked the door behind you, did you?
“ i’m here, (name). please, let it all out. “ anya rubs your back soothingly, not bothered by the drool and vomit spilling from your lips. you feel embarrassed under the worried, gentle gaze of anya. she whispers comforting words as you finishing vomiting. she grabs some paper towels and silently offers to wipe your face. you shake your head and gingerly take the towels from her hands and do it yourself.
anya opens her mouth to speak but you interrupt her.
“ it’s funny, “ you half laughed and sobbed, “ how you were able to come in so quickly just as i realized the door wasn’t locked. “
anya’s eyes widen with shock and looks as if she was about to burst into tears.
1 month after the crash.
“ anya, sweetheart? “ you gently call out to her before resting a hand on anya’s shoulder as stood by the sink, soaking curly’s bandages with soap and water. the fresh bandages are slowly starting to run out because of curly’s nonstop bleeding. you and anya both agreed to clean and reuse the bandages after one use to maintain the supply.
she still slightly jumps and turns her head around with a soft smile. “a-ah! s-sorry, (name). what’s wrong? “
“ let me clean the bandages and give captain his meds. you’ve been standing there for the past forty minutes. sit out in the lounge, okay? after watching you the first few times, i know what to do. “
a look of uncertainty dwells on her face as she ponders over your words. gingerly, you place a hand over her stomach. “ please, anya? i’ve seen how uncomfortable you look when you do this for him, you don’t have to hide it from me because i’m your lover. we’ve talked about this. i’ll do anything i can to shoulder your burden and make sure that you’re not pushing your body. “
anya’s grey hues flicker with appreciation and a twinge of guilt. “ okay, i’ll go sit down. if you need me, please holler out. i-i hate to make you do this after—“
“ anya. “ you interrupt her, reaching out to cradle her pale cheeks. they feel warm under your palms. your gaze pools into her own. “ anything. “ you whisper, resting your forehead against hers. anya’s lips pursue in a thin line. you know she wants to object but she swallows her words without anything to wash it down with, leaving behind a bitter taste. you lift your chin to press a lingering kiss to anya’s forehead.
tentatively, anya walks out of the medical, leaving you and a shell of a man in the room alone. a deep sigh runs past your lips and you go over to the half–foamed up desk to quietly grab a bottle of pain meds. “ captain. “ you mutter, walking over to the bed where he permanently lays. what a pitiful sight to witness. curly resembles a meat bag, his limbs left horribly mutated and amputated, his once tan skin is now all gone and long burned off. he’s stripped from his protection and only his vulnerable muscles are exposed. his only eye, wide and blue, stares up at you. you stare back blankly. through a singular sea of blue, you see a mass of fear, pain, and most of all, regret.
“ i don’t hate you, captain, “ you pop the bottle open. “ i’m sure anya doesn’t either. well, anya wouldn’t bring herself to hate you even if she wanted to anyways. “
he doesn’t respond but his permanent wide–eyed gaze continues to stares you down.
“ i’ll give you 5mg of oxycodone before i do your bandages. i’ll give you your second dose afterwards.”
you shake out two pills from the bottle. “ . . .all of this isn’t really your fault. misguided karma can be cruel. however, “ you slowly opened his jaw, the slimy sound of his muscles moving against each other makes you cringe. you see why anya can get more nauseated off of this. “ misplaced trust in a bitter person who’s undeserving of trust in the first place is what gets someone like you in a position like this. “
you hold his jaw, his exposed, irritated muscles twitch erratically against your protective layer of skin. your stomach swirls with a sinking feeling. curly starts to breath heavily, his pupil dilates. you hold one pill between your index finger and thumb. hot tears prickle at the corner of your twitching eyes as a shaky grin stretches across your face, and a bead of sweat rolls down your brow. you feel sick to the utter depths of your stomach.
“ don’t struggle , yeah? “
this wasn’t your worst moment right , curly?
0 days before the crash.
“ curly, fuck, where did he walk away to? “ you stopped curly in the middle corridors, pulling him back by his broad shoulder with a firm hand. curly, who’s face is full of panic and confusion, frantically responds back. “ i-i don’t know but i’m going to go find him to try and talk—“
“ i-i’m sorry, talk? this goes beyond talking at this fucking point! that fucking dog assaulted anya and she’s pregnant! “ you spat, heart full of frustration, “ do you think talking to her assaulter is going to fix shit? do you think doing the bare minimum is going to take back what she went through?! “
he runs a trembling hand through his blond curls. “ i-i understand but—fuck, let me just try—and—and, “
your hand drops to your side and you send him a look of utter disappointment. “ un—fucking—believable. how many times did anya tell you about jimmy? did you know about his shitty behavior even before she got pregnant? assaulted? she doesn’t want to tell me the answer so i’m fucking asking you! “
he stays slient, the guilty expression dawning on his face says it all.
“ . .what a great leader you are, captain. “ you growled, “ allowing that shitty friend of yours to ride this ship and you do barely nothing until the situation blows up in your face. this is what happens when you let your personal emotions dilute your judgment and reason as a leader. this is the outcome. the crew is my responsibility, my ass. if i had it my way, i would of shoved his ass in the cryo pod the second i’ve found out. but alas, i’m not the fucking leader but a damn intern. i held it allll in for a week for this shit? just imagine how anya felt to endure the awful trauma longer than that only for you, the captain, the only person with power, to handle it so horribly. fool.”you turn your heels and stomping back to medical for anya.
4 months after the crash.
“ daisuke. . kiddo, “ you gently call out to him as you find him somberly laying on his back next to the area leading to the cargo. his forearm rests over his eyes.
“ you okay? “
“ no, not really. .it’s just. .i wonder what my mother thinks right now. .she’s probably thinking i’m finally putting my feet into the water, finally learning and figuring out what i should to do in life during this internship. .meanwhile i’m on my back getting wasted off of. .mouthwash. ”
you sit down next to him. you thought about what to say for a prolonged moment before asking him,
“ before all of this, did you enjoy the internship? “
“ i. . .i did. .i was having fun . .with swansea, anya, you, a-and . . “
daisuke lets out a soft sniffle, you just smile solemnly.
“ don’t cry, sunshine. as long as you enjoyed yourself, that’s all that matters. even in the predicament we’re in now. .let’s have hope. once all of this is over, your mother will be proud that you got through this internship and you should tell her allll about what you did and learned with the ol’ man swansea. that man is a hot mess but i know he enjoys you as his intern.”
“ . . .really? “ he meekly asks, peeking at you from under his forearm with teary eyes. god, daisuke looks like a sad puppy.
“ of course, kiddo. “ you force out a happy laugh to appease him. you hate to lie to him but as long as jimmy is attempting to play captain, the situation will continue to spiral down into the abyss. you know with absolute certainty that jimmy was the one who caused the ship to crash. the fact that man pinned the blame on his close friend, who was trying to see good in him, for crashing the ship is beyond disgusting. judging from curly’s recent evaluation from anya before the crash, he did seem a little melancholic. but, for him to drastically make a reckless decision to sabotage the ship and everyone in it? he wouldn’t do that even if it was on his mind. jimmy on the other hand. .
“ oh. .it seems like you beat me to him. is he alright?”anya’s relieved voice rings in your ears. you draw your attention over to your partner who’s walking down the corridor towards you and daisuke. she uncrosses her arms that was once tucked to her chest and you raise a brow.
“ yeah, just a little sad but i was talking to him. how’d you know he was here? “
her gaze averts to the ground and you jump up, anger bubbles in your chest. “ jimmy, wasn’t it? what did he do? he didn’t hurt or yell at you or anything, did he? “
you pace over to her and rest your hands on her shoulders. “ no, no—seriously, i’m okay. . he send me here to check on daisuke while he took care of some things. i was just surprised you were here. “ it had to be more then that.
sighing heavily, you turn back to daisuke who was now attempting to get back on his feet. “ daisuke, be careful. .has swansea been making you drink that mouthwash stuff again with him? “ you questioned skeptically, walking over to him to assist him back on his feet. wobbling, the brunette boy softly groans as you let him rest his arm loosely around your shoulders for support.
“. .no. .yeah. . i. .may. .kinda, totally have went overboard with it this time. b-but i gave it to jimmy because i didn’t wanna mess with it anymore. “
aggravated, you smack your teeth, “ so you’re saying that he saw you like that and didn’t even bother to help you up himself and sends anya down here instead? i’m so sick of his shit! some fuckin’ wannabe captain he is! you could of threw up and choked on your own damn vomit! that careless fucker knew that! “
“ you’re starting to sound like swansea. “ daisuke mutters through his drunken haze.
anya speaks up in a soft voice that’s mean to calm you. “ (name), you have to calm down. i understand that you’re upset. .but we need to rest daisuke down somewhere in the lounge. “
your eye twitch and your lips purse. she was right. plus, you don’t want daisuke to hear all of this while he’s struggling with his own inner conflicts. even the effects of the dire situation is dawning down on him and taking a toll on his mental health.
but fuck, you’re tired of being quiet.
d o s o m e t h i n g
? ? ¿ ! months before the ????
you can’t sleep. a soft sigh leaves your lips. anya’s body lightly stirs besides you. you don’t want to leave her but it’d be right to check up on curly to see if he needs his meds. there’s no time clock but curly’s groaning and restlessness indicates you that it’s time for his painkillers. if he is in pain, you’ll just give him his meds and come back to anya. it’s been a straight shot to the medical room ever since the crash. the foam has completely fucked up the sleeping quarters. . maybe it’s for the better or worse now. everyone is bunched together in the lounge room with extra sleeping beds from the medical. luckily, there hasn’t been any problems amongst the crew and it’s easier to keep in eye on jimmy.
“ anya, “ you whispered out to her. she lays on her left side, facing you. pieces of her shaggy hair prettily hovers over her tired eyes as they fluttered open. “ yeah? “ she responds back, you send her a small smile, reaching out to brush the strands away from her face.
“ i’m going to go check up on captain in the medical. i’ll. .be back, okay? if this dumb thing goes off, “ you gesture to the broken robot standing an inch away from you and anya’s sleeping bags. thankfully it’s able to go off, albeit broken thanks to jimmy. originally, anya suggested the idea and you couldn’t agree more with it.
“ i’ll be running to you so fast like how i did after i found out that passed my final exams. “ you whispered playfully.
recalling the joyful memory, a soft giggle leaves anya’s lips. she remembered you were so anxious and restless over the final exams that she kept having to pinch you and make you run with her to get your mind off of things. once you found out that you passed med school, you ran so fast to anya while she was waiting outside of the campus for you and nearly ran her over. she nods with a beautiful smile that you missed so much. anya was always a carefree woman who was willing to go through hardships with a cool–mind and solutions. but, after this overhaul trip going downhill and the terrible shit that’s happened and is currently happening—the light in her eyes is duller. it mirrors her reserved and almost timid-like behavior now.
that’s not who anya is—that’s not her and that’s not who she should by the damages of a terrible, insecure man who refuses to swallow down his own ever-growing problems like a hard pill and take responsibility for his self-sabotaging actions. you bet he’d choke on himself and self-destruct if he ever tried swallowing. all he ever does is vomit and project himself onto others.
“ okay. we can also clean his bandages after we’ve rested. “ anya suggests.
you shake your head, ghosting a hand over her belly. the bump has slowly been getting bigger but isn’t very noticeable to others. “ there’s no we, just me. the last time you got nauseated, you asked jimmy to give curly his meds while i was busy with daisuke and. .he. .” you trailed off and sighed with frustration. you still can’t get over anya telling you the truth about jimmy getting frustrated at her for asking him to give curly his meds because of her nausea.
absolutely horrible.
before anya can say anything, you give her a quick kiss on the forehead.
“ i’ll be back this time. “
you got up carefully to not alert the broken robot and paced towards medical. as you did, you glanced around the lounge to see who’s in their respective sleeping bags.
daisuke is laid out asleep.
swansea has been sleeping by the utility and now you know why he was does. you don’t have any objections to it. it’s only fair for the sunshine to be preserved.
jimmy is no where to be found. cockpit, maybe?
as you near the medical, alarming sounds of struggling and curly’s groans made your heart drop. frantically, you sprinted towards the door and slammed it open.
s e c o n d c h a n c e
s e c o n d c h a n c e
“ wh-what the fuck are you doing, jimmy?! g-get off of him! “ her
you ran over to the self-proclaimed captain who was hunching over the defenseless curly, shoving pills into his mouth and down his throat while beating at his stomach. with all of your strength, you shoved jimmy backwards, pulling him away from curly’s mutilated body, who helplessly laid there in the bloodied medical bed, crying and groaning in pain.
“ are you out of your fucking mind, you crazy fuck?!”you screamed at him while he has this mixed, horrid look of panic and frustration on his unshaven face. the pill bottle clutched in his hand made a loud rattling noise as he drops them on the tile floor and it rolls next to you.
“ i-i— h-he was. .m-making too much n-n—oomph! “
thanks to your adrenaline, you shoved him—hard, causing him to stumble back against the desk. pill bottles tumble and crash onto the floor.
hurried footsteps approach the medical from the loud crashes and yelling.
“ so your fucking solution was to beat up that poor man who can’t even goddamn defend himself now? let me fucking remind you since you’re too busy trying to play captain and can’t take responsibility! that man is laying there, the way he is now, because of—ugh! “
in a burst fit of blind rage, he returns the favor and presses his heavy palms against your chest, harshly shoving you backwards. you try to maintain your balance, but your foot accidentally steps on one of the pill bottles, and you fall backwards onto the solid floor, hitting your head. hard.
crack!
you almost instantly black out. not before hearing a loud gasp and anya’s frantic shouting.
“ (name)! j-jimmy. . . at . .did. . .u do?! “
¿!!! ?????????
just me and you vs the world, anya.
“ seriously? this show is so horrible, anya! even my dad who has terrible taste in tv shows, can’t watch this! “ you groaned exaggeratedly, sinking your cheek into your palm, slouching on the elbow of the couch. anya shrugs with a smug smile, placing the tv remote down on the coffee table.
“ well that’s tooo bad, hun. i need to binge this show to clear my mind out completely. all i need is my go-to-combo i usually get from wendy’s. “
you roll your eyes, “ it could of been at least mcdonald’s or something. but. .wendy’s? “
“ they have the best frosties! don’t act you dislike it because they messed up your order once. “ she giggles, leaning over to playfully hit at your ankle.
the show starts and you can barely stomach it. you don’t understand how she zeros out her mind from watching this stuff. it’s so cheesy and bad.
you peer over at anya and just as expected, she’s watching it like she’s into it. anya’s sitting up against the couch, legs crossed while she’s wearing a oversized t-shirt and pajamas. her heap of black shaggy hair that reaches just below her shoulders, was beautifully messy. usually at night, she doesn’t really bother with it. her fair skin shines pretty under the tv light. her pretty lashes fluttering and downturned eyes glistening with interest as she watch the corny reality tv show—god, she’s so breathtaking.
“ so, anya. “ you speak up as soon as the tv cuts to commercials. her undivided attention draws over to you and you cast her a goofy, suggestive smile.
“ while this commercial runs, wanna makeout? “
she blinks at you several times as if to process your question and bursts out laughing.
“ ewwww! “
“ ewwww? what the hell, baby! c’meree. “ you get off the elbow of the couch to playfully grab and pull at the laughing anya’s arm to pull her closer.
“ we’re not some bored teenager couple, you know! “
you successfully pull her into you, wrapping your arms around her body. “ feels like we are when i’m with youu~ “ you coo, puckering your lips at her with teasing intent.
anya blocks your lips with her palm and you immediately lick at it. she gasps and retracts her hand away, allowing you the opportunity to topple her over and kiss all over her pretty face and pouty lips.
“ hehe, (name)! “
once you’re done with your barrage, you bury your face into her neck.
“ marry me once me and you become doctors, anya~ ” you croon, melting into her body.
there’s a momentary pause before her smiling voice responds to you, full of adoration,
“ of course. i wouldn’t have it any other way, (name).”
??? ??¿ is it finally over ??¿!
your eyes peel open, a surge of sharp pain and confusion shoots through your body like a needle. but, once your gaze immediately locks onto the woman you love above you, your heart calms a little. she doesn’t notice that you’re now awake and stares off into somewhere with brooding eyes.
“ a-anya? “
anya’s eyes widen and she snaps her gaze down at you in surprise as your head is currently laid on her lap. tears swell in the corner of her reddened eyes.
“ y-you’re awake again! i-i thought you were finally. .”
despite not being able to move your body from the waist under and through the pain pounding in your head, you smile weakly at her.
“ f-finally what? i-i told you i’ll come back to you. although. . .“ your eyes search the dim setting around you. it’s blurred and bright. it seems like you and anya are in the medical? didn’t you come back from medical after checking up on curly?
c o n f u s i o n
“ why aren’t we in bed? we’re in medical right now. . “
anya’s lips trembles as she struggles to not cry.
“ we’ve decided to rest in here and talk like we’re a bored teenage couple. “
you let out a weak laugh. “ r-really? my br-brain is all over the place right now. everything is starting to feel and look fuzzy. “
your eyes starts to dilate and unfocus but they never leave anya. she says nothing, and quietly caresses your cheek.
your skin has become more discolored while you were unconscious.
how many hours?
how many hours has it been since she locked herself with you and captain? and how many times has her thoughts endlessly ponder and ponder over jimmy’s words he once said to her months back?
t a k e c a r e o f i t
“ a-anya. .? “
anya forces out a smile. her quivering fingers brush away the sweaty hair sticking to your forehead.
my hands are s h a k i n g.
“ . .y-yes? “ anya can barely contain the heartbreak in her voice.
“ w-we’ll take of it together. “ you slurred, “ o-once i get my l-license, i’ll support us and you don’t need to w-worry about a thing. o-once the baby is born, i’ll take care of them while you st-study to get into medical school again. i-i’ll. .even help you. .too. i st-still have my. .notes. “
dark red liquid seeps down your nose. she sees the light becoming dull in your dilated (e/c) hues that she adored so much.
the external bleeding and swelling in your head is pulling you under.
a quiet sob slips from her throat and she gently brings your head up to her chest. her body shudders as she weeps.
there’s a few broken whimpers that sounds far too strangled to be hers or yours.
“ . . d-don’t cry, an. .ya, i. .i’m just g-gonna sleep. y. .you holding. .me like this. .makes me feel at ease. .i. .can finally sleep. .without. .leaving. .ou. .”
your eyes vanish behind discolored eyelids and your head slack against her.
and there’s a gaping hole akin to a black hole that swallows everything that bounded her down, her dreams, her hopes, her love, her fear, her emotions.
what’s left is reason—a reason to the best decision that anya alone can finally act.
with a strangely calm mind and red-rimmed solemn grey eyes, she glances up at the few bottles of pills now left on the desk.
you know you’re better than this.
m a k e n o m i s t a k e , t h i s i s n ‘ t m y w o r s t m o m e n t.
far from it. this is the best decision i’ll ever make.
i’ll take care of it.
everything’s black—but you hear banging, voices, bottles rattling, pained whimpering and strangled noises that sounds similar to a heartbroken man crying.
you slip back into momentary consciousness. through blurred vision, you see a slumped figure above you. you can’t identify who it is but red smears leaves a bit of a hard contrast to your unfocused eyes. without thinking, your feeble hand reach out and you’re only able to make contact with their chin, just with the tips of your fingers.
from one small touch, you can tell the skin long since lost its warmth and now is cold to the touch.
an unknown sorrow strikes your chest and you finally pass with a heart full of confusion, leaving it in a headlock.
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harrywavycurly · 11 hours ago
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Loving a Killer: Mistakes in a Hardware Store
Pairing: Killer!Harry x wife!reader
Masterlist: Here
CW: Harry is a tad bit over protective in this, threats of violence, semi angsty bits, language.
A/N: Harry had done something wrong and shockingly enough it has nothing to do with what he does for a living, so enjoy him trying to get you to forgive him✨
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“Looking at it every five seconds isn’t going to make it magically start ringing you know that right?” Harry just ignores Mitch’s comment as he looks at his phone for the sixth time in the last five minutes, letting out a sigh when he all he’s met with is the date and time on his Lock Screen, no message from you or your name flashing across it like it normally does when you call him. “Trouble in paradise?” Mitch asks as he looks over and watches Harry run a hand through his hair as he tosses his phone onto his desk.
“She’s not talking to me.” Is all he says before he stands up and begins pacing the length of his desk while Mitch spins his chair around so his back is facing his own desk allowing him to watch his bestfriend have what he could only describe as a breakdown of some sort due to not having heard from you all day. Harry pauses and runs a hand over his face then just looks at Mitch over his shoulder. “I think she’s mad-”
“What did you do?” Harry lets out a groan as he walks over to his desk and places his hands flat on top of it and Mitch raises a brow at him when he notices him look down and close his eyes while letting out a deep sigh. “Harry tell me you didn’t-”
“You’ve got to stop assuming I’m walking around killing people without telling you.” Harry jokes as he lifts his head to send Mitch a glare. “I didn’t even really put my hands on anyone this time.” He explains making his friend just roll his eyes as he crosses his arms over his chest.
“Then what exactly did you do?”
“She went with me to get some stuff so I can fix the shed door in the backyard and while we were at the hardware store some dude came up to her and started chatting her up so I might’ve threatened him a little.”
“You’re such a hot head man you need to relax and realize your wife is a catch so dudes are going to want to try to flirt with her.”
“What the hell did you just say?” Mitch doesn’t even flinch at how harsh Harry’s tone is as he straightens himself up and takes a step towards him with a quirked brow, Mitch is extremely familiar to this side of his bestfriend. “I’m just supposed to let people flirt with her and think they have some sort of shot with her?”
“They’ll know they don’t have a shot with her because she’ll let them know. She doesn’t need you to do it.” Mitch casually explains as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world but Harry just lets out a scoff and throws his hands up in air, clearly annoyed at the idea of having his wife be the one to tell creeps to leave her alone.
“She shouldn’t have to worry about telling wanks who want to chat her up to fuck off.” He snaps while he walks back over to his desk to reach for his phone. “I’m her husband it’s my job to do that for her.” Mitch rolls his eyes at his explanation as he watches Harry tap away on his phone.
“No it’s your job to trust her and let her handle herself in situations like that.” Harry can’t help but feel his heart sink as Mitch’s words hit him, he knows he can be a tad bit overprotective when it comes to you and that often leads to him overreacting in certain situations but he’s never thought about how him reacting the way that he does could make you feel as if he doesn’t trust you or think you can’t handle yourself.
“I do trust her.” Mitch just nods as he uncrosses his arms so he can stand up from his chair. “I just-you know how I am with her.” He says with a sigh as Mitch takes a step towards him so he can place a hand on his shoulder.
“I know how you are with her and I know it’s because you love her but sometimes it’s a little much. But the real question is how are you gonna fix this?” Mitch asks as he gives Harry’s shoulder a squeeze before letting it go. “I hear flowers work wonders.” He suggests making Harry send him a glare making Mitch chuckle because sometimes it’s glaringly obvious how single Mitch is compared to Harry.
“Already had a bouquet delivered to her office this morning since she only works a half day today.” He mumbles and Mitch just gives him a nod of approval as he watches Harry tap a few things on his phone before he locks it and slides into his back pocket. “I have to go. You good to handle the rest of the day without me?” Harry questions making Mitch just brush him off as he turns to head back towards his desk.
“Yeah I’m fine we have that Gavin guy tomorrow and today is just paperwork.” Harry just nods at Mitch’s answer before he gathers his keys and tosses his work bag over his shoulder. “Good luck.” Mitch says with a smile as Harry gives him one more glance before turning and heading out their shared office door and down the hallway for the door that opens to the stairs leading up to the lobby of the building the two of them work at.
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Harry hates the feeling he gets when he walks inside the front door, he’s not met with the usual warmth that always radiates off of you and seeps into his body and relaxes him as it makes its way from his tired feet all the way up to his sore shoulders. Today he’s met with silence and the utter coldness that comes with it and it’s almost enough to send a shiver down his spine, but the only thing that keeps him from turning around and leaving is that he knows you’re home because he parked next to your car in the driveway and he is willing to do anything get your warmth back into the house.
He knows where you’re at, it’s just something that he can’t help with what he does for a living he knows how to keep track of people when they’re in relatively close proximity to him. So as soon as he walked in the front door he could see your foot hanging off the love seat tucked away in the corner of the living room near the bookshelf next to the floor lamp that you opted to turn on instead of the main light. He acts as if he didn’t see you as he drops his keys in the bowl by the door and slips his shoes off before he makes his way into the kitchen where he places his work bag on the table, he can feel your eyes on him from the living room and he takes that as a decent sign that you’re even wanting to look at him.
He runs a hand through his hair as he contemplates his next move, he knows you don’t like confrontation so you won’t be the one to tell him you’re mad at him so if he wants this to get resolved in a timely manner he’s going to need to be the one to initiate the conversation but he’s just not in a hurry to hear you say you’re upset with him. So Harry does what he thinks is the best thing to do in the moment because he knows you, he knows what you really need from him in this moment and he’s more than willing to give it to you if it spares him, at least for a few minutes from having to hear you tell him how unhappy he made you the other day. He turns around and quietly heads into the living room, he watches as you close the book he knows you stopped reading the moment he walked through the front door and place it on the side table near the lamp. As soon as he’s in front of you he reaches down and grabs your hands as he drops to his knees, he looks at you as he brings your hands to his lips and places sweet kisses to your knuckles and he doesn’t miss the slight shade of pink your cheeks get at his actions.
“I’m sorry baby.” He makes sure his words come out nice and clear so you don’t miss them between little pecks to your knuckles. “I know I made you upset yesterday and I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have threatened him or-”
“We’ve had this conversation before haven’t we Harry?” You ask making Harry just swallow before nodding his head and he swears he feels his heart drop to his stomach when you turn and look away from him. “I know you want to protect me from all the creeps and jerks but Harry yesterday you-”
“Don’t say it.” He cuts you off as he lets your hands slip out of his as he stands up. “Please don’t say it.” His voice is low as he takes a small step away from you as he feels as if his world might be crumbling down around him as the thought of you telling him you were afraid of him bounces around in his head.
“Harry look at me.” He can’t help himself as he does what you ask because even though his whole world may feel like it’s on the verge of falling apart he’s still your husband, the man who hasn’t ever really been able to not do whatever it is you ask of him. “I’m not afraid of you.” He feels your hands on his arms slowly running up until they are cupping the sides of his face making sure he can’t look away from you. Your words take a moment to sink in through the layers of sheer panic and anxiety running through his mind but when they finally do Harry lets out a deep breath and feels as if his legs could give out at any moment with the amount of relief that washes over him.
“I was going to say that in that moment you were being one of the jerks you try to protect me from all the time.” All Harry can do is just nod because you’re right, he was being exactly the type of person he tries to keep you away from and honestly Harry is still recovering from the fact you admitted you aren’t afraid of him so a nod is the best he can do in the moment. “You threatened someone’s life all because he was asking me if I had any recommendations for a good weather resistant wood varnish.” When Harry rolls his eyes he instantly knows it’s a mistake because he feels your hands drop from his face making his lips turn downward into a slight frown while you take a few steps away from him.
“I’m sorry sweetheart but that was clearly a line and he was trying to flirt-”
“So him flirting with me means you need to come in and grab him by his shirt and tell him that if he so much as looks at me again the next project you’ll be working on will be his coffin?” Harry can count on one hand the amount of times you’ve raised your voice since he’s met you, each time has almost always been towards him and he hates that he’s the one who gets you to the point where you lose your ability to speak in your usual soft and gentle tone and are left with no choice but to make your voice louder and a little meaner in hopes it’ll help get your point across more clearly.
“I didn’t mean to grab him. That was a mistake.” He doesn’t make an attempt to get closer to you even though every part of him wants to reach out and pull you into him, he wants to give you the space you need to tell him exactly how his actions made you feel and he knows you won’t be able to do that if he crowds you. And as much as he normally loves to play dirty and use his knowledge against you, this time he wants you to get everything out because he wants to be better for you so if he has to stand here and take it for a few more minutes then so be it.
“Was that the only mistake you made yesterday?” He wants to say he really didn’t make any mistakes yesterday but he doesn’t, he just rubs his lips together as you place a hand on your hip letting him in on the fact you’re getting annoyed at this conversation.
“Please just answer me because I don’t want to argue with you anymore but I need to know if you really think that’s the only mistake you made yesterday.” Harry can tell by the slight pleading tone of your voice that you’re beginning to break, your walls of anger are starting to crumble and he can’t help himself but feel a small sense of relief because he can work with this, he can find a way to make your walls come down and get you to forgive him.
“No.” He answers as he takes a small cautious step towards you making you raise an eyebrow at him as a signal to have him elaborate on his answer. “I shouldn’t have threatened him or raised my voice in the store because I know how you feel about causing scenes in public.” He adds as he takes another small step towards you and he can’t help the small smirk that forms on his face when he sees your hand drop from your hip as you playfully roll your eyes at the mention of causing a scene.
“Anything else?” Your voice is much softer now and Harry feels like this is a good time to take a chance so he reaches an arm out so he can place a hand on your hip and he smiles when you don’t make any moves to wiggle out of his grasp or bring your own hand down to push his away.
“Letting you give me the silent treatment for the rest of the day. That’s probably the biggest mistake I made because you know how much I love hearing you talk.” Now normally you’d take that as a tease of some sort but Harry’s not an idiot, or at least not in this moment so he’s sure to sound as serious as possible without ruining the lighthearted mood that’s beginning to form between the two of you.
“You love hearing me talk?” Harry just gives you a smile as he ever so gently pulls you closer to him by his hold on your hip.
“Your voice is one of my favorite sounds.” He admits without a single drop of hesitation because it’s the truth. “Especially right before you fall asleep and it’s this mixture of a whisper and just mumbles of nonsense.” His eyes stare into yours as he raises his free hand so he can brush a few strands of hair out of your face and back behind your ear. “But my favorite is when it’s got this hint of excitement to it like when you’re telling me about a new book you found that you’re now obsessed with or better yet the rants you go on about books you hate those are very fun and your voice gets this almost twinge of absolute disgust to it that I always find entertaining because it’s so rare you find something you don’t like.” He keeps his hand on the side of your face cupping your jaw, gently running his thumb over your cheek.
“So really baby it about killed me not getting to hear your voice for a whole day all because I was an asshole and couldn’t handle some guy flirting with you in a Home Depot.” He wants to pull your face towards his and seal his words with a kiss but he doesn’t, he’s a gentleman after all and knows it’s only right to let you decide when he’s earned his kissing privileges back sees as you just broke the day long silent treatment you were giving him not even five minutes ago.
“His name was Brad.” Harry’s grip on your hip tightens a little while he other hand falls from your face as you give him an unwanted detail of your encounter yesterday. “Maybe if you knew that before you went all crazy on him you would’ve reconsidered? Because who’s going to pick some dude named Brad over their hot husband named Harry?” He just chuckles as you give him a playful smirk while reaching your hands up to grab both sides of his face.
“Well when you put it like that.” He jokes as he feels you begin to pull his face down towards yours. “I really am sorry sweetheart I swear it won’t happen again.” He whispers as he bumps the tip of his nose into yours making you smile.
“I know you are and that’s why I forgive you.” That’s all Harry needs to hear before he allows himself to close the gap between his lips and yours, he feels you smile against his lips as you pull him even closer to you when you feel him try to pull away.
“I love you.” He mumbles between kisses making you giggle as your hands go from his face down to his chest so you can grip onto his shirt while his hand holds onto the back of your neck.
In this moment Harry knows that the two of you are going to be okay, that while you may hate how he over reacts and gets a little too protective at times, you still love him and haven’t decided to give up on him or at least not yet. So Harry decides right then and there that he’s going to actually try to be better, but while he really will try he can’t promise he won’t mess up every now and then because he’s still Harry, and when it comes to you he doesn’t think he’ll ever be okay with people getting too close or being too friendly.
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itwdoris · 2 days ago
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tw; piss drinking, n-verbal reader.
★.
you clung to his shirt with tearful eyes looking at him as if you were begging for something, and indeed you were, because you couldn't think, you couldn't speak, your head was a mess and you needed him.
he dropped the phone to the side before coming closer to you and holding your face, wiping your eyes with his finger and leaving a kiss on your lips. "what happened ?" his arms wrapped around you and pulled you into his lap, where you would be safe, his gently voice echoed in your ears. "hum? tell me."
he ran his hands over your ears, tucking your hair behind them and holding your face gently as he looked at you waiting for an sign. you shook your head with a sad pout slightly on your lips, ah, that was like a stab in his chest.
you wanted to tell him so much, you tried so hard, but you just couldn't, it was too difficult and all you could do was whine low about that bad feeling sinking your face into his hands.
"oh no-" a little desperate, he let go of your red wet face to held you tightly and carefully so that you could change places, this time leaving you where he was sitting while he got up to stick his hands down his own pants, taking out his full and big pretty cock, showing you. "here !"
he shoved it in your mouth without leaving you time to think, hearing and feeling your muffled whimpers before you slowly stop it, swallowing the cry as you sucked his cock. your hands resting on your own thighs while your mouth sucked on his tip, eyes half swollen almost shut as you sobbed for the last times.
he was so good, so warm, and he caressed your hair while you suckled him calmly, listening his softly moans because of the suction. your still tongue only moved when a few drops dripped onto it, making you open eyes to look at him as you rubbed your tongue against the wet head in search of more.
he moaned low with pleasure and relief as he released it, a few streams leaking out before the flow formed and piss started down your throat, almost filling your mouth. he hold your hair a little tighter while looking at you, so pretty, with your mouth on his cock, drinking it all in.
"better now?" his voice came out almost slurred, but still affectionate. with lowered eyes and slightly red ears. "with my cock in your mouth, drinking all my piss, that's what you needed, isn't it ?"
he stroked your hair lightly, seeing you so focused on not letting anything leak out, lips around the length too big for your little mouth. so quiet that you didn't even seem to have cried recently, even though his eyes were still as red as his face, everything went away when he shove his cock in your mouth.
would be silent if it weren't for the sounds your mouth made, or the gulping sounds, still accompanied by the moans coming from his mouth. kinda indecent, but that was exactly what you needed.
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so i wrote the beginning thinking of choso, specifically dada choso. imagined this yesterday and i've been thinking about it, and oh lord hope you don't read it as if the reader is a noisy crybaby, they're just quietly sobbing.
along the way i ended up changing it a bit so that i could make it encompass more chars, thought a lot about yuta tbh. just mentalize whoever you want, i didn't wanted to select specific characters and limit you guys
anyway! ik it's pretty short, but hope you like it! <3 mwah
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hheaven-sentt · 2 days ago
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blood and bone III
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summary: vulnerability leads to injury. sometimes, injuries can heal with minimal scarring | leon kennedy x gn!reader
word count: 4.8k
warnings: mentions of violence and gore, alcohol consumption, language, two idiots in love, angst for a bit, mentions of regrets and a bit of self loathing, reveal about reader (i have been planting the seeds of it omg i'm so excited)
notes: part 3 as promised omg i feel unstoppable | ao3
one | two
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It feels like there’s a hole in your chest. You go through the motions, not paying attention to much else. It feels good to throw yourself into your work. There’s nothing else keeping you steady anymore. The sting of rejection hangs heavy on your skin, it’s all you can think about. Does Leon know? Does he know that you want to know him as intimately as you know guts and sinew? Does he know how bad it hurts to know that he won’t let you?
“You’re being dramatic,” Rebecca says. You look at her through your lashes over the files you’re examining. “I’m sure it wasn’t that bad,”
You sigh. No, perhaps it wasn’t. “I don’t know,”
Rebecca frowns, contorting her soft features into some kind of sympathy, and leaves you to your sorrow.
Your apartment is so empty when you return to it. It’s always been this way, but it somehow feels worse now. Before your trip to New York, you’d had something to hope for. You felt a bit brighter. Now, you feel as empty as the living room of your place. It’s too cold here.
You collect your forgotten glass from last night. There’s a bit of liquor still loose in the bottom. You wash it out in the sink and place the glass on the counter. You feel like crying.
Everything is too much. The case that is no longer yours lives in your brain, Leon’s rejection weighs down your bones, and you feel more alone than you have in months.
You don’t even realize you’re crying until the salty taste runs over your lips. Tears claw at your throat, feeling like barbed wire scratching at your insides. You try to blink them away, but it just makes their assault worse. With a sigh, you sink to the floor. You feel pathetic, crying on your kitchen linoleum. There's nothing worse than crying alone in a place not meant for tears. You breathe in deeply, feeling empty with each intake. You put your head in your hands.
It’s then that your phone rings. With a groan, you stand, snagging the phone from where it rests on the counter. You flip it open with one hand.
“Hello?” you ask, sniffing aggressively in order to maintain some sort of composure.
“You okay?” Rebecca’s voice, soft and delicate, drifts into your ear from the speaker.
“Yeah,” you lie. “Place is real dusty, made the mistake of kicking it all up,”
With a small laugh, Rebecca continues. “I just wanted to remind you of the gala tomorrow night. The whole team is going, which includes you, so wear something nice,”
You roll your eyes. “I think I’ll sit this one out. Those places make me anxious anyway,”
“No way,” Rebecca says. “You have to come. You’re, like, the guest of honor,”
You frown deeply, scrunching your features together in what looks like a wince. A gala is the last thing you need right now. It really sounds like your worst nightmare.
“He’ll be there,” Rebecca says. You frown more.
“Is that supposed to convince me to come?” you ask, picking at a piece of the counter that’s peeling up.
“When’s the last time you saw him?”
“Probably a month ago,” you say, pursing your lips. “Haven’t seen him since we got back from New York,”
“Yikes,” Rebecca says. You roll your eyes. She doesn’t know the half of it. “Just wear something nice, okay? I expect to see you decked out in all your best jewels,”
“Right, because I’m known for those,” you joke.
She bids you goodbye, and you stare at the shadows on your floor cast by your body in the light of the rangehood. You don’t even know what you would say to Leon. An apology doesn’t seem quite right, neither does pretending nothing ever happened. If anything, you’re sort of hoping he ignores you completely. That would be much easier than pretending to enjoy small talk.
With a groan, you take yourself to bed. This is something you can think about in the morning.
The sunlight does not shed any new perspective on the situation. You’re hopelessly staring at your closest, running through your options of what to wear.
“This is childish,” you mumble to no one in particular, and thread through your clothes to find a simple button down and pleated pants. They will have to do.
You dress quickly. You’re stuffing your shirt into your pants when a button pops off. It lands with a clang against your mirror. You groan, a long, drawn out sound that releases some of your tension. Why can’t anything go right for you on days like this? You reach down to pick up the fallen button, choosing to discard it on your nightstand. Maybe you could figure out how to sew it back on. It can’t be much different than sewing up a wound, right?
The taxi ride to the banquet hall is silent, save for the staticky noise of the radio. The cabbie doesn’t speak, and you prefer it that way. There’s not much for you to say anyway, at least in terms of small talk. You’re not exactly keen on sharing your pathetic situation either. So you remain silent until you pull up to the building. Checking your pockets for your necessities, you push out of the cab. It’s starting to drizzle, so you hurry inside.
You find Rebecca quickly, wearing a beautiful tan dress that hugs her figure well. You suddenly feel frumpy. The cuffs of your sleeves are fraying, your shoes are a size too small, and your pants barely brush the tops of your feet. Maybe you should’ve just stayed home.
“You made it!” Rebecca cheers, shoving a glass of champagne into your hand. ��I wasn’t entirely sure you would,”
You force a smile, and say, “Me neither,”
She grins at you, threading her arm through yours. She drags you amongst the other guests, greeting the ones she knows and introducing herself to the ones she doesn’t. You admire her ability to fit into any space. There’s no evidence to suggest that she has ever seen horror, no clues that point to sorrow running in her veins. You cannot say the same for yourself. You’re fidgety, uncomfortable, and try your best not to speak to others. Your eyes shift across the ballroom, looking at the hundreds of heads that are crammed into the space. It makes you frown.
“Doing okay?” Rebecca asks. You nod. “We can find somewhere to sit?”
“You keep mingling,” you say, pulling your arm free from her. “Come find me when it gets boring,”
She flashes you a smile that has lingering worry, and lets you drift into the crowd. This is the last place you want to be, and she knows it. You find an empty table near a big window. The curtains are drawn back, and you can see the rain beginning to pelt down onto the courtyard outside. You’re not sure how long you watch the rain fall, casually sipping your champagne. The screech of a chair being pulled out beside you draws you back to reality.
Leon looks handsome, albeit uncomfortable, in his pressed suit. He fidgets with the cuffs of his jacket as he sits, pointedly avoiding eye contact with you. You swallow hard.
“You looked lonely,” he says, adjusting in his chair. “Figured you could use some company,”
“I appreciate the kindness,” you say, setting your glass onto the table. He finally levels his gaze on you, and a chill snakes down your spine. “I’m alright, though,”
“Maybe I just wanted an excuse to get away from the crowd,” he says, half smiling. 
You’re not sure what to say, so you don’t say anything. You turn your gaze back to the throng of people casually conversing like nothing bad has ever happened. The thought makes you frown. Of all the horrors and devastation you’ve seen, this has got to be the worst. People mingling and drinking like others aren’t dying a few states away.
“Weird, isn’t it?” Leon’s voice pulls you back to him. It’s a bit gruff and worn, like he’s been talking all night. Maybe he has. “Seeing people dance and laugh and be so care free?”
You nod. “They have no idea what’s out there,”
“No, they don’t,” he says, trailing his eyes over your crossed legs. “Maybe it’s better that way,”
“Maybe,” you muse, reaching for your glass again. It was half full before Leon sat down; it’s now almost completely empty. Your mouth feels dry.
“How’ve you been?” Leon asks, leaning forward, forearms on his knees. You watch him carefully, like he’s hiding something.
“Fine,” you say. You’re not sure why the words come out so clipped. You can’t find it in yourself to be sorry, though. He wants arm’s length? That’s what you’ll give him. “You?”
He frowns. “I’m alright. Just haven’t heard from you,”
“Didn’t know you wanted to,” you say. The lines around his mouth deepen, and you want to kiss them away.
“Are we back to this, then?” he asks. You feel his gaze on every inch of your skin. You feel suddenly exposed, raw. You frown.
“This is what you wanted, isn’t it?” you ask, swallowing. “Easier that way,”
You’re not sure why you throw the words back in his face, but you don’t exactly regret it. He watches you like he’s studying you.
“Is that what you want?” he asks, voice low and delicate, like he’s treading uncharted waters. You suppose that’s exactly what he’s doing.
You frown. “You said it. Not me,”
“But is that what you want?”
You don’t know. You want him to give you more than surface level. You want him to be open with you. You want him to laugh at your jokes, and sit on your couch, and help you cook dinner. You want him to know you.
“I don’t know, Leon,” you say. Something sparks in his eyes, an emotion you can’t quite place.
He’s silent for a while before asking, “What’s your sister’s name?”
You gape at him. “Angela,”
“Did you like having a sibling growing up?” he asks, scooting his chair a few inches closer.
You smile a bit. “Sometimes. Other times, I wanted her to disappear. Y’know, sibling quarrel and all that,”
“I don’t, actually,” he says. You furrow your brow. “I didn’t have any siblings,”
“Oh,” you say, because there’s not much else you can say. “You’re welcome to have mine, if you like,”
He laughs then, bright and wide. “I think I’m alright. I’ve learned to like being alone,”
“What did you do?” you ask. “Before everything, I mean,”
He contemplates your question for a moment, like he’s deciding if he wants to share pieces of himself with you. “I was a cop,”
“Noble,” you say, smiling. “That tracks,”
“What did you do?”
“Nothing,” you say, sighing. “Was training to be an EMT, but…things got in the way, and now I’m here,”
“So you’ve always been interested in medicine?” he asks. You nod. “Did you ever want to be a doctor?”
“No,” you say. “Wanted to be in the thick of it. Saving lives, and all that,”
He grins. “Bet you regret that a bit now,”
You shrug. “Sometimes. I like my job,”
“Even when it’s hard?”
“Even when it’s hard,”
He’s silent then. You watch him watch you. Something shifts in the tension between you, and you relax into your chair a bit more. There’s no one else in the room, no music playing, nothing. Just you and Leon, trying your hands at getting to know someone. You’re not sure you know how to be vulnerable like this anymore, not after everything. Visions of blood caked under your fingernails and memories of the screams of the damned make knowing another person challenging.
“What’s your favorite color?” you ask. He grins at you like a child.
“Green,” he says. You nod. “Yours?”
“I like a good burgundy,” you say. He rolls his eyes playfully. “Or maroon,”
“Are those not the same thing?”
You laugh. “Not even close. Burgundy is more brown, maroon is more of a reddish purple,”
“Right, my bad,” he says, smiling.
The hole in your chest begins to close. This feels like an olive branch. You want to pull him into your orbit, feel him on every inch of your skin. You want him to consume you. You’re almost positive that he would.
“Come dance with me,” he says. You almost drop your jaw at the suggestion.
“Who are you and what have you done with Leon?” you tease, wringing your hands together. You want to take him up on the offer, more than you think you know, but it doesn’t seem like something he would do. You’re almost worried that this is some cruel ploy.
He laughs. “We can do something normal for once. No harm in it,”
You nod, standing to follow him into the crowd of other couples. His hand is steadfast on your waist, the other gently clasping one of your own. You feel stiff as he leads.
“Loosen up,” he says, leaning further into you. Your throat feels like it closes up.
“I’m loose,” you lie. He grins at you, perfectly soft lips pulling around his stupidly white teeth. God, you want to kiss him.
You decide then that you don’t want easy. You don’t want to keep him at an arm’s length, and you’ll do anything to convince him he doesn’t want it either. You want him, wholly and vulnerable, completely. You want him to look out for you. You want to do mundane, domestic things with him. You want to cut his hair because the barber never gets it right. You want to walk into the kitchen and see him doing the dishes, not because you asked but because he wanted to clean up your conjoined space. You want to fold laundry with him.
You’ve never wanted this way, or this much. Before, you’d been so content to let him be cold and detached, to throw yourself into your work and live alone. Now, you’re not happy with that. And you think he knows that too.
“You look nice tonight,” he says, voice low and gentle. It washes over you in a wave, settling your bones and warming your blood.
“Careful,” you tease, smiling. “I might think you’ve gone soft on me,”
“I think you knew that already,” he says. “This is the part where you tell me that I look nice too,”
He does look nice. You knew that already. His suit is almost all black, save for the cuff links that shine against the lights of the ballroom. He looks more than nice. He looks perfect, collected.
“Well, now you’ve gone too far,” you say, grinning so wide that your cheeks hurt. He rolls his eyes. “You do look nice, though,”
When the music fades out, he doesn’t let go. You don’t want him to anyway. You want to stay here, like this, forever. You want him to keep holding you until you’re both no more than dust. He drums a rhythm on your side with his fingers, and a shiver runs through you.
“Take a walk with me,” he says, almost bumping his nose with yours when he leans in to look at you. He’s a hair’s width away, and if you leaned in a touch, you’d be kissing him. You wonder what would happen if you did.
“Okay,” you say.
He leads you out of the crowd by your hand, which you can feel the beads of sweat beginning to form upon. You catch Rebecca’s eye as you move through the crowd. She gives you a wide smile and a subtle thumbs up, which you scowl at. It’s raining hard when you exit the ballroom. You can barely see the cars on the street ahead of you through the thick sheet of water coming down.
“Still want to take that walk?” you ask, looking up at Leon. He’s still holding your hand. He grins at you.
“Afraid you’ll melt?” he returns. You laugh. He gives your hand a squeeze. “Just for a bit,”
You’re soaked to the bone two minutes after you step into the shower. Your clothes stick to every inch of your skin and a cold wind blows, threatening to freeze the very marrow within your body. You won’t let it, not when Leon is looking at you the way he is, cheeks tinged pink from laughter and smiling so wide that you can see your reflection in his teeth.
He never once lets go of your hand as he leads you down the sidewalk. You’re silent, but it’s not uncomfortable. A car whizzes by, nearly splashing you, but Leon pulls you into him and covers your body with his. You catch a whiff of whatever fancy cologne he’s wearing, and you almost feel drunk on it. Maybe it’s the champagne you’d been sipping, but you’re not sure. He keeps you within reach, just in case another car attempts to sour your evening, he says.
“Why do you never call me by my name?” he asks suddenly, looking at you through stringy and soaked hair.
You shrug. “Everyone calls you by your name,” you say. “That’s also not entirely true. I only call you ‘Kennedy’ sometimes,”
“Only when you’re mad at me,” he says, grinning. “Which is often,”
“Well,” you say, returning the wattage of his smile. “There’s your answer,”
You stare at him for a moment, taking in the sheer beauty of his person. Before, you’d thought he was all hard edges and crisp lines. That he would cut you if you got too close. Now, though, in this moment and this lighting, he is the softest thing you’ve ever seen. Round cheekbones, soft lips, gentle features that are perfectly symmetrical. He has a few freckles dotted across his cheeks, smile lines that make his eyes crinkle. A hairline scar that extends across his right cheek. Without thinking, you reach out, smoothing your fingertips over it. It’s not that deep, barely snagging on the ridges of your fingerprints. You hear a breath hitch in his throat at the movement.
“Sorry,” you say, retracting your hand. “I didn’t mean to do that,”
“It’s okay,” he says, voice barely above a whisper. His eyes scan your face, lashes fluttering against the assault of the rain. He returns the gentle gesture by pushing a few wet strands of hair out of your eyes. His touch is ghostly, barely there.
“I never thanked you,” you say. He furrows his brows. “For staying with me that night. It…it really helped me,”
“You needed me,” he says. “Did you know that you snore?”
You bark a laugh that you can’t stop from bubbling over the surface. “I do not,”
He grins. “You totally do. It’s almost scary. I didn’t know a person could make that kind of noise,”
“You’re so mean,” you say, frowning. “You really know how to flatter someone,”
He rolls his eyes. “C’mon, let’s go. I need out of these clothes,”
He leads you down a few winding streets, making turns that seem random. It dawns on you then that he’s bringing you back to his apartment. Your heart leaps into your throat, clogging up your breath and your functioning. Your brain is swimming. You’re going to see how he lives, what his life looks like outside of work. He’s letting you.
He only drops your hand to get the door open. The lock jams, which you can’t help but laugh at, and then he’s finally letting you into his space.
His apartment is almost bare, similar to yours. White walls wrap the space, a few items dotted around on tables. He doesn’t own a television, you note. There’s a wall of shelves, though, filled pretty decently with books. You didn’t take him for a reader, but you suppose it makes sense. You toe your shoes off near the door, soaked clothes dripping onto the hardwood floor beneath you.
“Sorry about the mess,” you say, looking up at him. He shrugs.
“Better rain water than something else,” he says. You smile.
You follow him to his room, watching the way he begins to loosen in the space. Regardless of the lack of personality, this place is his home. It’s where he feels most comfortable, most him. And he let you into it. He digs through a tattered dresser that has likely seen many homes, turning only to haphazardly chuck an old shirt at you. You barely catch it, letting out a huff of air at the impact. He follows it with a pair of shorts.
“You’re welcome to shower,” he says, tugging off his sopping suit jacket. He begins working on the buttons of his shirt next, and you almost let your jaw drop.
“I think I’m done with water for a few hours,” you say, cheeks growing warm. He’s halfway to his navel when you excuse yourself to the bathroom. You guess on which door it is and push into it, closing it behind you. You catch your breath.
You feel giddy. You can’t help the childish smile that creeps onto your lips.You change quickly, catching a glimpse of yourself in the mirror.
You look frumpy, but very comfortable. You wonder what you’ll do next. Maybe he’ll just call you a cab and send you home. You pray to whoever is listening that that isn’t the case. With a heavy exhale, you leave the bathroom.
“Just leave your clothes in there,” Leon hollers from his bedroom. “I’ll deal with it tomorrow,”
You nod, following his voice. He’s clad in a sweatshirt that is a bit too big on him and a pair of sweatpants. He looks so human. You take a moment to look around the room. Where he didn’t have a television in his living room, he does have one in here. You think that’s odd. There’s a VHS player balanced precariously on top of a few books, wires running across the floor to connect to the television on a table. You wonder if this is where he spends most of his time. He leans over the VHS player, popping a tape into its mouth. Then, he settles into his bed.
You’re standing in the doorway, wearing his clothes, watching him get comfortable in his bed. You feel like some weird stalker or voyeur. It makes the tips of your ears burn.
“You can come sit, y’know,” Leon says, grinning at you. Something shifts in his gaze; he must see the turmoil on your face. “Or I can call you a cab,”
You shake your head, moving to join him. He leaves plenty of space between you–always the gentleman. You don’t recognize the movie playing on the screen, but you watch it anyway, focus so trained on it to prevent you from staring at Leon. The film drones on even though you’re not really paying attention. Leon shifts beside you, arm brushing against yours. You almost stop breathing. You feel silly for feeling this way; childish, weak, vulnerable. You wish you could be more nonchalant, more like your peers. But you don’t know how to be like that anymore. You only know quick action and timidness. You only know how to hide vulnerability for the sake of keeping people from asking if you know what you’re doing. You only know how to be closed off in the hopes that people won’t ask you how you are.
Because you know the answer. You know that if someone asks, you might unload on them. You might tell them how much you miss your family, how hard it is to dig through bodies and pull out their most valuable pieces. You might tell them how much you miss home, how much you regret taking a job in Raccoon City, how much you wish you’d stayed in school, how much you wish you could hold your nieces. 
As you think about it, you begin to cry. You’re not even sure why. It’s after a particularly unbecoming sniffle that Leon shifts his focus to you. You feel very embarrassed, trying in earnest to not let him see you cry.
“I’m sorry,” you say, wiping at your eyes with your wrinkled palms. “Sometimes I get lost in my brain, and it makes me cry,”
He shifts a bit closer to you, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. His fingers move in circular motions, and you can’t deny how much calmer it makes you feel.
“Talk to me,” he says, almost whispering. You look him in the eye then, and you see the sincerity in his gaze. “I want to listen,”
You sniffle again. “I thought it was easier to be mean to me,”
“I don’t want easy,” he says. You gnaw on your lower lip. “I’m sorry I said that,”
“I don’t want easy, either,” you say. He grins at you then, full and wide, and bright enough to blind you. You wonder if this is the moment you’ve been waiting for. You wonder if he’s finally going to kiss you and get it over with.
“Can I be honest?” he asks. His voice is so soft, so calming, you wonder how you never noticed it before. You nod. “I thought, for a while at least, that if I was just rude enough to you, you would stop following me on missions. I thought that if you couldn’t stand to be around me, you wouldn’t, and you wouldn’t follow me into the jaws of death. Obviously, that didn’t work. That day that you stitched me up? It all hit me. I just…don’t know how to be the man you deserve yet,”
You smile, face warm and light, insides gooey and sticky. “I saw you as a challenge. I would continue to work with you out of spite,”
He rolls his eyes. “I know that now,”
“My turn for honesty,” you say, voice shaking a bit. “I was…in Raccoon City. When everything happened, I mean. I saw it first hand. It’s the reason I am where I am. I was training to be an EMT there, had some friends I’d been staying with. That’s why I get so…weird when I have to do my job. It’s why everything is so hard,”
He nods as he listens. “That must have been hard,” he says. You nod.
“It was devastating,” you say, breathless. “If I was shy before–which I was, mind you–I was a recluse after. It’s why I don’t go out, why I don’t like groups of people, why I have such a hard time being vulnerable,”
“I know what that’s like,” he says. You feel like your heart cracks open, beckoning him inside.
“You make me want to learn how,” you say, trying your hardest not to look away from him. “You make me want to learn how to be vulnerable, how to be open. I’ve told you things even Rebecca doesn’t know about me. I just…struggle with it sometimes,”
He’s silent as he watches you, and you worry that you’ve said the wrong thing. Maybe he just wants to be friends, have an extra shoulder around for when things get to be too much. Maybe you’ve read every situation, every interaction completely wrong. You don’t really know what you’re doing, after all. Maybe your naivety clouded your judgment.
It’s then that he does kiss you. It’s soft and pliant, warming you to your very core. Your hands shift to hold him better, fingers curling around the collar of his sweatshirt to pull him impossibly closer. You melt into him, letting him set little fires across every inch of skin he consumes. You want him to devour you whole. One of his hands finds the back of your head, tilting you ever so slightly to give him better access to you. You give it up without a second thought, a small gasp escaping you as your tongue meets his. In this moment, nothing else exists. The movie playing on the television is drowned out by your bliss, the deafening roar of blood in your ears settles to a beautiful hum. It feels like the crest of a wave splashing back down into the ocean, like a symphony crescendoing. You could die here, wrapped in his warmth and his kisses, and be happy.
When he pulls away, breathless and kiss swollen and reddened, you want to sink back into him. You find it cruel that he would pull away from you, leave you cold where you were so warm before.
“Keep being vulnerable with me,” he says, breath uneven and stuttering. “Please don’t ever stop,”
If he keeps looking at you like this and kissing you, he doesn’t have anything to worry about. You’re more than willing to be whatever he needs, reading to be molded like clay into his desires. You want it. You want him. Your heart flutters at the thought that he wants you too.
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izzylovesmatt · 3 days ago
Text
Confessions Part 2
matt x fem reader
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summary - after matt confesses to his bsf drunk he is forced to tell her the truth and it ends up leading to something more than just a friendship
part one
(dividers by me give credit if gonna use)
⚠️warnings⚠️suggestive content,no smut (sorry)
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As the morning glow seeps through the black curtains and fills the room i start to stir awake. I open my eyes as the sun hits my face i start to remember all last night, all matt's words were suddenly coming back into my knowledge even though i wish to just forget them. I see that matt's still sleeping so i slip away like a sly fox into the kitchen hoping to not wake the three sleeping boys up. I look into the fridge for any kind of drink that isn't soda. To no surprise there wasn't only pepsi's and dr pepper's. i go into the cabinet to grab a glass and i fill it with water from the fridge for matt. i grab advil and i make some butter toast to keep his stomach from hurting or from throwing up. As i slowly slip back into the room i notice matt isnt in is bed. i place the items in my hands on his nightstand and lay back into the bed and scroll on my phone till he gets back from what i thought he was doing. i thought matt was showering, well he was but he wasn't washing his body or his hair. He was faintly moaning and i could hear through the door. Did he forget i was here? is he doing it on purpose? or is he hurt and im just being dirty? What do i do? After hearing him a bit more it's obvious he isn't hurt and those are moans of pleasure. I can hear him moan my name slowly between soft whimpers. After 15 minutes of his shower i hear the water stop. Before he gets back in here i have to leave and do something away from his bathroom i can't have him knowing i just listened to him do that and i can't have him know it made me soaked. So i do, I get up and go back into the kitchen getting chris and nick the same things i got matt so i didnt look like a weirdo. I hear footsteps from nicks staircase i look over and nicks coming down rubbing his head and sighing loudly "is this for me?" he says referring to the toast, water, and medicine. "yeah for you and chris." i say getting chris's last peice of toast out from the toaster. "did matt get one? also chr-" nick says before getting interrupted by matt. "hey why don't i get toast not fair!" he says his wet hair still clinging to his forehead. "chill you did its in your room on your nightstand i thought you were still sleeping but i heard the water running." i say finishing up chris's toast as i watch heat rise to matt's face him realizing that i could've heard him moaning my name. "oh okay i'll um give this to chris" he says taking the plate from my hands. " oh there's a girl down there let me do it." nick says taking the plate from matt. "thanks nick!" i say shouting so he can hear me. After nick comes back up he grabs his toast says his goodbyes then he heads upstairs. "so y'had fun last night huh?" i say to matt. "well the parts i can remember yeah" he says with a mouthful of toast. "oh figures you don't remember anything." i say giggling at the boy who doesn't know what he said the very night before. "why are you lauging? what did i do last night that's making you laugh like that" he says covering his face with his hands. "wellll do you really wanna know?" i say still slightly laughing. "yes i want to know was it embarrassing did people laugh at me?" he says still covering his face "well first it's something you said and did but nobody else was around so-" he interrupts me "i don't wanna know i don't wanna know." he says getting up and puting his plate in the sink then sitting on the couch trying to remember anything he did or said last night. "are you sure it's kinda important." i say sitting on the couch next to him. " uh oh" he says. making it seem like he knows exactly what im talking about.
Time skip
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After 3 hours of me and matt sitting on our phones and having only small conversations he finally said something to me that was more than a small conversation or a joke. "So about what i said last night" i turn my phone off as he speaks. "what about it?" , " did i say it in the club orr?" my heart starts to race for some odd reason i shouldn't be nervous around matt i never am. "well there were a few things you said. and did" , "okay but what would you say was thw worst this i did." i think back to last night when he asked me to change infront of him but that wasn't bad we do it all the time, finally it came to me. " well we were at the club and y-" suddenly he cuts me off "nonono i don't wanna hear just yet so we were at the club okay now where were we when i said the worst thing i said all night." , "well it really wasn't that bad it's just i don't think you would say it when you weren't drinking" , "yeah but where were we?" , "we were here and i was trying to sleep but you wouldn't shut up about-" he cuts me off again. " no i don't wanna hear it. yet" , " okay when do you want to hear it?" , "I don't know but i think i know exactly what i told you and i-" i cut him off with a soft kiss to his lips. Matt kisses you back almost immediately, he softly grabs your cheek as you wrap your arms around his neck. "i- i" matt try's to speak but cuts himself off. "what matt?" i say still looking at him even though he's looking down now. "i didn't want to tell you this because your my bestfriend but i-" he doesn't finish is sentence once again. "what mat-" he cuts me of by saying "i love you." The room goes silent. I don't know what to say. "and i know i shouldn't because your my bestfriend but please don't go silent please don't stop talking to me." he says still looking anywhere my into my eyes. "i-" matt cuts me off before i can speak "i'll drive you home if you don't wanna be here i unde-" i cut him off "i love you too matt." he looks at me finally in the eyes. "wait you do?" he says with a look of relief on his face. "yes matt but you don't know how to shut up so" i say before he pulls me back into the kiss, it feels like the whole world stopped just because of a silly little drunk confession. "now how about i show you to my room and i have a even better thing we can do back there." he says pulling me off the couch. As we're walking back to his room i can't help but be excited over this new beggining.
i thought i posted this 3 days ago but i just saved it to my drafts also im sorry it's short and not that good my great grandmother just passed and i havent been doing the best but i will make a smut soon to makeup for this
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theobrowningfd · 2 days ago
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The stark contrast between the cool room and the warmth of Tam, allowed Theo to really relish in her. Just having her next to him helped him relax a bit, no longer fighting his muscles from letting him sink into the hospital bed beneath him. He hadn't even realized how tense he was until that moment, allowing himself to finally hit pause and relax, the weight of the day catching up to him. He was sore and in excruciating pain but he wanted to be strong and to be okay for her. Nodding, "I hope so. Though these last few months even before today have sort of tsught me that I don't need to be strong you know?" He tilted his head so he can see her as she looked at him, "and i want them to know that just as much."
Hearing those words being spoken after the day he had, broke open something within him that he didn't even know he had been guarding. He exhaled and tears welled up in his eyes, "and you are mine, one hundred percent. No doubt in my mind about it." He nodded, sniffling so those years wouldn't fall, "and likewise. Always." He nodded, his eyes filled with affection and pride at how far they had come since her return to town. Closing his eyes as he could start to feel the exhaustion creeping up, he nodded before feeling her lips upon his, nodding ever so slightly. Giving in to the exhaustion, he held onto her as he closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.
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END
She was far warmer in comparison to him, urging Tamara to gently tug at the hospital blanket that was situated at the end of the bed up and over their bodies, before she got comfortable nestled underneath his arms. Feeling him relax beside her was conformation that she'd made the right decision. If he didn't strain, he would heal quicker. If that meant never leaving the space the entire duration of his stay, so be it. Seeing him smiling was comforting, even if it was small. She was so glad to be able to be there with him now, leaning her forehead against his cheek. The room reeked of antiseptic, but now that she was close to him, she caught lingering notes of smoke and vanilla bourbon. "They know you're strong, too." Tam added softly, tilting her head slowly so she could look into his eyes. "So strong." and not just physically, but mentally as well. When Theo put his mind to something, there was no stopping him. Well... majority of the time. This was just all an awful accident.
"You..." she started, exhaling the lightest of breaths in amazement, moving a hand to his jawline. "are the love of my life, and I would do anything for you," he was well aware of what her job meant to her, too. Knew that it was her way of giving back -- to the best of her ability. "But thank you." she couldn't tell if it was her or him that was shaking, or a combination, trying not to move too much before bringing her lips to his in the most tender kiss. "Shh." Tamara hushed, barely above a whisper, brushing her fingers that had cupped his cheek to trace soothingly around his features. "Try and get some sleep. I'm not going anywhere. Not right now."
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get-good-tardigradez · 1 year ago
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I don’t know who needs to hear this but:
if he reminds you of Dean from Gilmore Girls, run
if he reminds you of Jess from Gilmore Girls, also run
if he reminds you of Logan from Gilmore Girls, you know it, skrrt skrrrt
If you disagree, this post was for you.
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pucksandpower · 4 months ago
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Baby Steps
Charles Leclerc x single mother!Reader
Summary: you are barely staying afloat, desperately trying to wrap your mind around your impending motherhood while juggling being a press officer for Scuderia Ferrari … Charles shows you that you don’t have to do it alone
Warnings: pregnancy, family abandonment, and harassment
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You grip the edges of the trash can tightly as your stomach lurches again. The half-digested remains of your breakfast spill into the plastic liner with a sickening splatter. Straightening up slowly, you take a few deep breaths and wipe your mouth with the back of your hand. The smell rising from the can makes your stomach roll threateningly once more.
Turning away quickly, you lean against the side of the Ferrari motorhome, eyes closed. The sun beats down relentlessly, and you can feel sweat beading at your hairline.
This “morning” sickness is no joke — it seems to strike at all hours of the day. You thought you had gotten away with a quick breakfast break an hour ago when Carlos was in a team briefing, but apparently not.
Footsteps on the gravel make you open your eyes. You pray it’s not a member of the press, or, god forbid, Carlos. The last thing you need is a photo of the Ferrari press officer tossing her cookies behind the paddock. But no, it’s Charles Leclerc striding towards you, his brow furrowed.
You straighten up and attempt nonchalance. “Good morning, Charles.”
He slows, glancing between you and the extremely obvious trash can of vomit. “Are you alright?”
“Oh, yeah, fine,” you say breezily. “Just a bit of food poisoning, I think. Had a questionable chicken salad for dinner yesterday.”
You notice Charles is wearing a soft grey t-shirt and track pants, his hair damp from the shower. He must have just finished with physiotherapy. He looks so effortlessly handsome, it’s frankly unfair. You suddenly feel acutely aware of the sheen of sweat on your face and your limbs heavy with fatigue.
Charles’ face remains creased in concern. “Food poisoning? Have you been to the medical center?”
You wave a hand. “Oh, I’m sure it’s nothing. Probably just 24 hours of hell before I’m back to normal.” You attempt a smile, but have to grab the trash can again as the smell from it hits you like a wave.
Charles springs forward and grabs your arm as you retch miserably. “Whoa, take it easy,” he says, supporting you until the heaving subsides.
You stay hunched over, breathing hard. The world is spinning a little. You hear Charles say firmly, “Okay, come with me. Let’s get you sat down.”
He keeps a hand under your arm and leads you into the blessedly cool motorhome. The rich scent of coffee fills the interior, reminding you that you haven’t managed to keep any food down today. You sink gratefully onto a padded bench at one of the tables.
Charles sits opposite you, his green eyes studying you intently. “When did the sickness start?”
You sigh, shoulders slumping. The jig is up. “About four weeks ago,” you mutter.
Understanding dawns on Charles’ face. “Oh. Oh!” His eyes flick down to your still-flat stomach. “So you’re ...”
“Pregnant. Yes.” You drop your head into your hands.
“Well, hey, congratulations,” says Charles gently. “That’s really exciting.”
You huff out something between a sob and a laugh. “Exciting? More like a nightmare!” You run your fingers back through your hair and look desperately at Charles. “You can’t tell anyone, okay? Not even Carlos. I can’t risk anyone finding out about this. If I lose this job ...”
Charles’ brows draw together again. “Why would you lose your job? You’re Carlos’ press officer. I’m sure he’d be thrilled for you.”
You shake your head rapidly. “No, no way. I can’t take time off. The season just started! Carlos needs me, I organize everything for him. The travel, the events, the media, everything!” You bite your lip anxiously. “Maybe … maybe after the baby comes, I can figure something out. But I have to keep this quiet until then. Please.”
Charles reaches over and lays a hand on your arm. His touch is gentle but firm. “Y/N. Working yourself into the ground won’t be good for you or the baby. Have you thought about taking a sabbatical? Just a few months to rest, focus on yourself.”
Panic flares in your chest. “No! No, I can’t.” Your breathing quickens. “You don’t understand — I have no one else. No partner. No family. This job is everything. If I lose it ...” You trail off, trying to blink back the sting of tears.
Charles is silent for a long moment. Then he says, “Okay. I understand this is your decision. And I promise I won’t tell Carlos or anyone else.” He hesitates. “But Y/N, please take care of yourself. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.”
You nod jerkily and avoid his earnest gaze. With a shaky breath, you push yourself to your feet. The motorhome tilts sickeningly for a second.
Charles rises too, watching you with concern. “Will you be alright?”
You nod, not trusting your voice. You start to head deeper into the motorhome, desperate to lie down before the nausea returns.
“Y/N,” Charles calls after you softly. You pause, glancing back. “Congratulations again. You’re going to be a wonderful mother.” He gives you a small, warm smile.
You swallow hard. “Thank you, Charles,” you whisper. Then you turn and continue on unsteadily, one hand braced against the wall.
You make it to the small office that passes for your private quarters on race weekends. Collapsing onto the ergonomic desk chair, you stare up at the ceiling and place a hand over your still-flat belly.
A baby.
Your baby.
Fear and wonder tangle inside you.
You must have dozed off, because the next thing you know a hand is gently shaking your shoulder. You jerk awake to find Carlos standing over you, his eyebrows drawn with concern.
“Y/N? Are you ill?”
You stand up too quickly and immediately regret it as the room spins. Carlos grabs your shoulder to steady you.
“I’m fine,” you say hoarsely. “Just needed a quick nap.”
Carlos frowns, clearly unconvinced. “Charles said you were throwing up outside. That you have food poisoning?”
You make a mental note to kill Charles later. “Uh, yeah. Bad chicken salad, I think. But I’ll be okay.” You attempt a reassuring smile.
Carlos sits down on the edge of your desk, watching you closely. “Why didn’t you tell me you were unwell? You know you don’t have to worry about me, I can look after myself for one day.” His dark brown eyes are filled with worry.
Guilt twists your gut. Carlos has always been extraordinarily kind and thoughtful, a rarity in the high stakes world of Formula 1. You hate lying to him.
“I know,” you say quietly. “I just didn’t want to let you down. But you’re right, I should have said something. I’m sorry.”
Carlos shakes his head immediately. “No, don’t be sorry. Just focus on feeling better, yes? Take tomorrow off too. I order you to rest,” he adds with a small grin.
You smile weakly back. “Okay, boss.”
Carlos stands and gestures to the tiny table bolted to the wall. “I brought you some tea and crackers. Hopefully you can keep it down.”
“Thank you. I really appreciate you checking on me.”
He smiles. “Of course. Feel better, Y/N.” With a last lingering look of concern, he turns and leaves you in peace.
You look at the steaming tea and crackers and feel tears prick your eyes again. Carlos is a good man. Too good, probably, for the pragmatic demands of Formula 1. You know you should tell him about the pregnancy. But the thought of losing your place here, on this team, fills you with dread.
This high stakes world of racing is all you’ve known for the past three years. You can’t imagine life outside the bubble of the paddock, away from the adrenaline and pressure. Away from the team. Away from Carlos. Away from Charles.
With a deep breath, you sit up straight and tear open the crackers. You need to think about this rationally. Maybe Charles is right and you do need to slow down eventually. But for now, for the next few months at least, you have to keep going like nothing has changed.
You place a hand on your stomach as you nibble a cracker. “It’s gonna be okay, little one,” you whisper. “We’ll figure this out.”
***
The smell of coffee turns your stomach these days, but you still make your way blearily to the breakfast buffet each morning. Carlos is an early riser, and you need to be available whenever he is ready to start the day. You scan the offerings, deciding toast is the safest option, and reach for a couple of dry slices.
“Oh, Y/N!”
You turn to see Charles holding out a pre-packaged parfait cup. “I grabbed an extra yogurt by mistake. Do you want it?”
You hesitate. Your first instinct is suspicion — this is the third time this week Charles has “accidentally” had an extra snack to offer you. But the yogurt does look appealing ...
“Sure, thanks,” you say, taking the cup from him. Charles shoots you a smile before grabbing a plate and continuing down the buffet.
You sit down next to Carlos with your toast and yogurt. He glances up from his phone. “Morning. Feeling better today?”
You nod, mouth full. In truth, the nausea has continued, but you’ve gotten better at hiding it from Carlos and powered through.
Charles joins you both a few minutes later, greeted by Carlos with a fist bump. You peel open your yogurt while half-listening to the two men discuss the upcoming practices.
The sweet, fruity parfait is cool and soothing on your sensitive stomach. You find yourself polishing it off in record time. As you scrape the last bit of yogurt from the bottom, you realize Charles is watching you.
“Good?” He asks.
You lick the plastic spoon clean before answering. “Yeah, really hit the spot, thanks.”
Charles’ eyes crinkle with a smile. “No problem. I’ll try to grab two tomorrow.”
You feel your smile grow fixed. This is getting ridiculous. Charles Leclerc does not care this much about your yogurt preferences. He’s up to something.
Over the next week, Charles’ thoughtfulness continues. A cold bottle of water when you’re looking hot and tired. A sandwich from a local bakery when you missed lunch. Your favorite chocolate bar when you mention a craving in passing. Always with an innocent smile, as if he’s not playing Superman to your pretend Lois Lane.
It all comes to a head on race day. You’re in the scorching sun on the grid, already feeling the fatigue of the hectic weekend. Carlos is doing his pre-race routine, so your attention has lapsed. Suddenly a blessedly cold bottle of water appears in front of your face. You look up to see Charles grinning down at you.
“Stay hydrated,” he says with a wink.
That does it. “Okay, enough!” You snap, smacking the water bottle away. It falls to the ground with a thud, water glugging out.
Charles’ eyes go wide with shock. “Y/N?”
Grabbing his arm, you pull Charles several steps away from eavesdropping mechanics. “Why are you doing this?” You hiss. “I don’t need you to baby me!”
“What?” Charles looks completely bewildered. “I’m just trying to help-”
“Well, stop,” you interrupt sharply. The hurt on Charles’ face makes you falter, but you press on. “I don’t need your pity. I’m fine.”
“Pity?” Charles frowns. “It’s not pity, Y/N. I care about you.” He places a gentle hand on your shoulder. “You’re always taking care of everyone around you. Now you need someone to take care of you too.”
His kind words hit you like a gut punch. Oh God, the stupid hormones! You feel hot tears spring to your eyes.
Charles’ alarmed expression softens. “Hey, I didn’t mean to upset you ...” He pulls you into a hug. One hand smoothes your hair while the other rubs comforting circles on your back.
“Shh, it’s alright,” he murmurs. You cling to him, embarrassed by your raw emotional response but unable to stop the tears.
After a minute the wave passes. You pull back, wiping your eyes. “Sorry. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
Charles smiles kindly. “Nothing is wrong with you. But I understand this is a difficult time.” His expression turns serious. “If you ever need anything, please ask me. I’m here for you.”
Looking up into Charles’ earnest green eyes, you feel a rush of gratitude. Whatever awkwardness lingers between you has evaporated. Charles is a true friend.
You squeeze his hand. “Thank you. That means a lot.” Glancing around, you notice some odd looks from passing crew members. “We should probably get back to work before people think there’s a full-blown soap opera going on over here.”
Charles grins. “Agreed. But this conversation isn’t over. Dinner tonight in my room?” He raises an eyebrow.
You laugh, blinking away the last dampness from your eyes. “It’s a date.”
***
You smooth your hands down your dress as you approach Charles’ hotel suite, suddenly feeling nervous. You’ve been in drivers’ rooms countless times for work, but this feels different. More intimate.
You take a steadying breath and knock. Charles opens the door, looking unfairly handsome in a crisp button down shirt.
“Y/N! Come in.” He steps back to allow you inside.
The suite is spacious and modern, with floor to ceiling windows along one wall looking out over the glittering city. Charles leads you through the living area to a set of glass doors. “I thought we could eat out on the balcony,” he explains, opening the doors with a flourish. “The fresh air will be good for you and baby.”
You step outside and have to stifle a gasp. A small table is elegantly set for two, a vase of flowers in the center. String lights twinkle overhead. “Charles, this is beautiful!”
He looks pleased. “I’m glad you like it.” Pulling out a chair, he gestures for you to sit.
As he takes the seat opposite you, you notice several covered dishes on the table. Charles sees you looking and smiles a bit sheepishly. “I, uh, called my mother earlier.”
You raise your eyebrows in surprise. Charles rubs the back of his neck. “I asked her what foods she craved when she was pregnant with me and my brother. So I ordered a bunch of that from room service, in hopes there might be something you’d like.”
A lump forms in your throat. You reach over and squeeze his hand. “Charles, that is so incredibly thoughtful.”
Pink tinges his tanned cheeks. “Of course. I want to take care of you.”
You chat comfortably over food and Charles’ excellent choice of wine for you — sparkling grape juice. He relaxes as you praise the chicken and melon he ordered.
When you sit back contentedly, Charles fixes you with a thoughtful look. “So, do you know how far along you are?”
You hesitate. “About three months now.”
He nods. “And have you been to a doctor yet?”
Your fingers find a groove in the wooden table to trace. “Not yet.” At his surprised look, you add defensively, “I’ve just been so busy with work. But I’m sure everything is fine.”
“Still, you should make an appointment soon. Just to be safe.” Charles’ tone is gentle.
You nod without meeting his eye. An uncomfortable beat passes.
“Do you ...” Charles pauses delicately. “Forgive me, but … do you know who the father is?”
Your cheeks flame. You stand abruptly, walking over to the balcony railing. After a moment Charles joins you, leaning on the rail at your side.
“I’m sorry, that was too personal,” he says quietly.
You shake your head. “It’s okay. I just ...” You glance up at him. “He’s no longer in my life.” You look away, a lump in your throat.
Charles doesn’t ask anything more, just moves closer in a gesture of silent support. You stand together breathing in the night air. The twinkling city sprawls before you. For a moment, the future doesn’t feel quite so frightening.
Eventually you stifle a yawn behind your hand. Charles glances over. “You must be exhausted. I should let you get to bed.”
You smile gratefully. He walks you to the door of the suite. Pausing, you stand on tiptoes and kiss Charles lightly on the cheek. “Thank you again for dinner. For everything.”
His eyes shine as he gazes down at you. “Of course. Sweet dreams, Y/N. And ...” He brushes a feather-light touch over your belly. “Sweet dreams to you too, little one.”
You feel your heart melt just a little. With a last smile, you head down the hall to the elevators. As the doors slide closed, you catch one last glimpse of Charles watching after you.
Back in your smaller, blander room, you change for bed in a happy haze. Sliding between cool sheets, you let out a contented sigh. Tonight was lovely. Charles’ thoughtfulness reminds you there are still good people in the world. For the first time in weeks, you feel a spark of hope.
You drift off to sleep with a hand resting gently on your belly. Everything seems less frightening now that you aren’t alone. Whatever happens next, you and your baby will get through it together.
***
The buzz of the media pen is giving you a headache today. Or maybe that’s just the pregnancy. You blink heavily, trying to focus on Carlos speaking into the microphone in front of you. You hit record on your phone as he answers the first question. It’s your job to capture every word to ensure he’s not misrepresented later.
The reporter’s voice fades in and out. You sway slightly, shaking your head. Just need some fresh air. You take a step away from the crowd, vision blurring at the edges. Dark spots dance across your eyes. The concrete floor rushes up to meet you-
“Y/N!”
Strong hands grab your shoulders, slowing your collapse. Your head spins as you try to make sense of it.
“Y/N, can you hear me?” Charles’ worried face swims into view above you. You part your lips but no words come out.
There’s loud commotion around you now. You feel yourself being shifted, lifted. Snatches of Charles’ voice pierce through the fog.
“She’s pregnant ... get help ... ambulance ...”
You try to cling to consciousness but it’s like grasping at smoke. The world goes dark.
When you resurface, it’s to antiseptic white walls and a steady beeping. Hospital. An IV pulls at your arm as you shift.
“Y/N?” Charles appears at your side, relief breaking across his face. “Thank God. You’re awake.”
Before you can respond, he’s disappeared again, calling for a doctor. You try to push yourself more upright but your limbs feel like lead.
A brisk older woman in a white coat enters, glancing at the monitor beside your bed. “Good to see you awake, Miss Y/L/N. You gave us quite a scare.”
“What happened?” Your voice comes out hoarse.
“You fainted from low blood pressure. A common issue in pregnancy, but yours seems to be more severe.” The doctor flips through your chart with a frown.
Charles stands anxiously at the foot of the bed. “But she’ll be alright now?”
The doctor hesitates. “I’m recommending complete pelvic rest and limited activity for the remainder of the pregnancy. Strictly no standing or walking for prolonged periods.” She pins you with a sharp look. “And if your blood pressure drops again, we’ll have no choice but to put you on full bed rest.”
Your stomach drops through the floor. “What? No, I can’t! I have to keep working, I-”
“Y/N.” Charles’ voice stops your panicked rambling. His face is lined with concern as he takes your hand. “Your health is what matters most.”
The doctor nods briskly. “Precisely. No job is worth risking your or your baby’s safety.” With a final warning look, she departs.
The moment she leaves, you burst into tears. Harsh, gasping sobs wrack your frame. This is a disaster. Without being able to stand or walk for long stretches, you’re useless to the team. You’ll be fired for sure. And then what will you do? You have no one, no other skills-
Warm, strong arms wrap around you as you weep. Charles cradles you against his chest, making low soothing sounds.
“Shh, it’s going to be alright,” he murmurs, stroking your hair. “We’ll figure this out.”
You clutch fistfuls of his shirt, burying your face in the soft cotton. The steady thump of his heartbeat slowly calms your hysteria.
When the tears finally subside, Charles eases you gently back against the pillows. His thumbs brush away the moisture from your cheeks.
“I know you’re scared,” he says quietly. “But I promise, I will do everything I can to help you. We are in this together now.”
His green eyes radiate such sincerity, you feel some of the panic and despair lift. You cling tightly to his hand, anchoring yourself to him like he’s a rock in a stormy sea.
***
You pick listlessly at the greyish meat and mushy vegetables on your hospital dinner tray. At least Charles had the foresight to sneak in some contraband snacks earlier — you polish off the last crumbs of the cookies he brought, wishing futilely for something more appetizing.
A knock at the door precedes Charles peeking in. “Hungry for something better than hospital food?” He holds up a paper takeout bag and shakes it enticingly.
You brighten immediately. “Charles, you’re my hero.”
He laughs and enters, pulling a table over your lap to serve as a makeshift dining surface. Soon plastic containers of pasta, salad, and fresh bread are opened, the savory scents making your mouth water.
Charles watches fondly as you tuck in. “I wasn’t sure what you’d feel up to eating. But who doesn’t like Italian food?”
You make a noise of emphatic agreement through your full mouth. Charles chuckles.
When you finally surface for air, he clears his throat. “So I was thinking ...” Charles busies himself folding and refolding your napkin. “My apartment in Monaco is pretty big for just me. And it has a guest room that’s just sitting empty.”
You raise your eyebrows, waiting for him to go on.
“Well ...” Charles rubs the back of his neck. “I thought maybe when you’re discharged, you could come stay with me for a while. So I can make sure you’re not overexerting yourself.”
You frown slightly. “Oh. That’s really kind, but I’ll be fine once I’m out of here.”
“Will you?” Charles levels you with a knowing look. “No offense, but you’re not exactly the best at asking for help when you need it.”
You open your mouth to protest, but can’t really argue with that.
“Let me do this for you. For my own peace of mind too,” Charles implores gently. He takes your hand, blue eyes full of sincerity. “Please?”
Looking into his earnest face, you feel your weak resistance faltering. Still ... “I don’t want to be a burden,” you mumble half-heartedly.
Charles squeezes your hand. “You could never be. I care about you, Y/N.” His thumb brushes over your knuckles. “I want to take care of you and the baby.”
The warmth in his voice melts away the last of your reluctance. And honestly, the prospect of having Charles doting on you is far preferable to being alone in your small, dreary apartment.
You meet his hopeful gaze. “Okay. If you’re sure you don’t mind, then … I accept your kind offer.”
Charles’ answering smile rivals the sun. “Yeah? Oh, that’s fantastic!” He sweeps you into an enthusiastic but gentle hug. You cling to him, feeling the nervous knot that’s been your constant companion for weeks finally start to loosen. Everything will work out.
That night as Charles is leaving, you call his name softly. He pauses, one hand on the door.
You twist your fingers in the blanket, suddenly shy. “I just wanted to say … thank you. For everything. I’ll find a way to repay you someday, I promise.”
Charles’ expression softens. He comes back and squeezes your hand. “You don’t owe me anything. Just focus on yourself and that little one.” He strokes a finger over your belly. “That’s all the repayment I need.”
With a last smile, he slips out, leaving you to fall asleep with a heart full of gratitude and growing affection for your kind rescuer.
***
You smooth your hands nervously over your dress as you approach Fred Vasseur’s office. This is it. Time to tell your boss that you’ll be leaving him in the lurch smack dab in the middle of the season.
Charles gives your shoulder a reassuring squeeze. “It will be okay. Just explain the situation.”
You take a deep breath and nod. Charles opens the door and gestures for you to enter first.
Fred rises from behind his desk, surprise flickering across his face. “Y/N, Charles. What can I do for you?” His gaze darts between you curiously.
Your mouth goes dry. Charles gently guides you to sit in one of the chairs facing Fred, taking the other himself.
“Y/N has something she needs to discuss with you,” Charles begins calmly. “I’m here for moral support.”
Fred’s eyebrows raise but he nods for you to go on. Your hands twist together in your lap.
“Well, I ...” You have to pause and swallow hard. “I recently learned that I’m pregnant. And I’ve developed some, uh, complications that mean I can’t travel or be on my feet much.”
Fred’s eyebrows climb higher. “I … see. Congratulations?” He still looks perplexed.
Charles jumps in. “What she’s trying to say is, she needs to take a leave of absence. Doctor’s orders.”
“Ah.” Understanding settles on Fred’s face. He turns back to you. “I’m very sorry to hear you’re unwell. Of course health must come first.”
You feel yourself relax slightly. “So I can take a sabbatical? My job will still be here when I’m able to return?”
“Absolutely.” Fred nods. “You’ve been invaluable to our team. Your role will be waiting whenever you’re ready.”
You could cry with relief. “Oh, thank you! That means the world.”
Fred smiles kindly. “Think nothing of it. Focus on your health and that baby. We’ll manage in the meantime.”
Charles reaches over to clasp your hand supportively. “Is there anything else she needs to know before starting her leave?”
Fred considers this. “Y/N will have full pay during sabbatical, of course. And keep me posted on any support you require — medical, household, anything at all.”
You clutch Charles’ hand, too overwhelmed to speak. He smiles. “Very generous. We appreciate that greatly.”
After finalizing a few details, you both stand. Fred comes around the desk to shake your hand. “Best of luck with everything. Let me know if you need absolutely anything.”
You whisper a heartfelt thank you before allowing Charles to guide you out. Safely in the hallway, you turn and fling your arms around him.
“Charles, thank you,” you murmur into his shoulder. “I couldn’t have done this without you.”
His strong arms come around you, cradling you close. “Of course, Y/N. I meant what I said — I’ll be by your side every step of the way.”
You cling to each other for a long moment, his steadfast support washing away your lingering fears. As long as Charles is with you, you know everything will work out just fine.
***
You fidget in the generic mint-colored exam room, paper crinkling beneath you as you perch on the edge of the table. Charles sits in a nearby chair, scrolling through his phone, the picture of calm. You wish you shared his zen attitude.
A brisk knock precedes the door swinging open. A smiling older woman enters, glancing down at her chart.
“Y/N? I’m Dr. Boucher, nice to meet you.” Her smile widens as she looks between you and Charles. “And you must be the dad! Wonderful.”
Your mouth drops open to correct her, but Charles beats you to it. “That’s right, thank you,” he says easily, standing to shake the doctor’s hand.
You snap your mouth shut, eyes widening. But the doctor has already moved on, washing her hands at the sink.
“Now then, let’s take a look at this baby, shall we?” She pats the exam table.
You lie back, hiking up your shirt to expose your belly. The cool gel makes you shiver as the doctor smears it over your skin. She places the ultrasound wand low on your abdomen and moves it slowly.
The screen blooms to life, blurred black and white shifting until a shape emerges — a tiny profile, curled arms and legs distinct. You gasp softly. There’s your baby.
Dr. Boucher smiles. “There we are. Looks to be about 16 weeks along. Growing beautifully.”
You can’t tear your eyes away from the screen. Your throat feels tight. After so many weeks of secrecy and fear, this precious little life finally seems real.
“And there’s the heartbeat.” The doctor turns up the volume, and a rapid thumping fills the room. “Nice and strong.”
Tears spill over your cheeks before you can stop them. A glance over shows Charles watching the monitor intently, green eyes shiny with emotion. He reaches for your hand, gripping tightly.
When the appointment ends, you both exit the office in a daze. As you walk down the street to Charles’ car, he turns to you.
“That was … incredible,” he says softly. “Seeing your baby for the first time ...” He trails off, at a loss for words.
You lift his hand and press a kiss to the back, hoping he understands the depth of your gratitude. Charles smiles tenderly in return.
Safely home in Charles’ plush apartment, you curl up together on the sofa with mugs of tea to continue gazing at the ultrasound photos. Charles slips an arm around your shoulders, his thumb idly stroking your arm as you chatter excitedly about preparing a nursery.
This moment, here with Charles, your child’s heartbeat still echoing in your ears … it’s the closest thing to pure joy you’ve ever known. The future finally feels bright with hope. You lean into Charles’ warmth and send up a silent prayer of thanks for this man and the new life he’s given back to you.
***
You curl deeper into the plush couch in Charles’ apartment, cradling your mug of tea. Rain patters against the windows overlooking Monaco’s glittering harbor. The cozy scene makes you feel safe enough to finally open up.
“Charles?”
He glances over from where he’s poking at the fire. “Hmm?”
You twist your fingers together nervously. “There’s more I should tell you. About how I got pregnant.”
Charles rises and comes to sit beside you, face open and attentive. Taking a deep breath, you begin.
“It happened last winter, during the off-season. I went back home to Italy for a while, to the little town outside Milan where my family lives.”
You stare into your tea, remembering. “There was a man vacationing there, from Rome. Dario. We met in a cafe and just … clicked. He was handsome, charming, a perfect gentleman.” Your lips twist wryly. “Or so I thought.”
Charles remains quiet, letting you gather the words.
“We spent every day together for two weeks. Took long walks, went on romantic dinners. When it was time for him to leave, we ...” You trail off, face warming.
“You made love,” Charles supplies gently. You nod, still not meeting his eyes.
“I thought it meant as much to him as to me. But after he went back to Rome, his texts and calls slowly stopped. And then I found out why.”
Your voice drops to a pained whisper. “He was married. His ‘business trip’ was just a chance to fool around. When his wife saw my texts on his phone … it exploded. And then my family found out about the affair.”
Finally you lift your head. Charles’ face is lined with compassion. “They disowned me. Called me a fool and a harlot. It didn’t matter that I was lied to — as far as they’re concerned, I brought shame upon our family.”
Hot tears spill down your cheeks. Charles immediately pulls you into his arms. You cling to him, crying into his shoulder as he rubs your back.
“I’m so sorry,” he murmurs. “You did nothing wrong. This Dario took advantage of you, and your family should have supported you.”
Charles holds you until the storm of tears passes. When you finally pull back, he cups your face in both hands, brushing away the lingering moisture with his thumbs.
“Thank you for telling me,” he says softly. “I know that wasn’t easy. You’re so incredibly strong.”
Leaning forward, he places a tender kiss on your forehead. Then his palms slide down to cradle your rounded belly.
“I’ve got you now,” Charles murmurs. “Both of you. You’ll never be alone again.”
Nestled in his lap, you close your eyes and just breathe. The remnants of hurt and betrayal wash away, replaced by the safety of Charles’ embrace. Whatever comes next, you have found your sanctuary here, with him.
***
You wander through the apartment looking for Charles, one hand braced on your lower back. Your belly has popped noticeably in the last couple weeks, throwing your balance off.
Not finding Charles in any of the usual spots, you head down the hall towards the spare bedroom. When you push open the door, your jaw drops.
The room has been completely transformed. Bright sunshine spills through the windows onto whitewashed walls. A plush rug covers the hardwood floor. In one corner sits a fully assembled crib, stuffed animals piled inside.
Charles stands back to admire his work, shirtsleeves rolled up and hair adorably mussed. He turns when you gasp softly.
“Y/N! I wanted to surprise you.” His grin falters. “Do you like it?”
“Like it? Charles, I love it!” You blink back happy tears, wandering further inside. Charles’ face lights up.
“I wasn’t sure what color to paint, so I left the walls white for now,” he explains, coming over to slip an arm around you.
You lean into him, gazing around. “It’s perfect. Our baby is so lucky to have you.”
Pink tinges Charles’ cheeks. He kisses the top of your head. “I’m the lucky one.”
You decide on a pale green for the walls. Charles immediately fetches paint supplies, but hovers anxiously as you start rolling color onto the first wall.
“Are you sure you should be doing this?” He eyes your protruding stomach. “The fumes can’t be good ...”
You wave off his concern. “I’ll be fine! Here-” You dip a roller in paint and offer it out. “Make yourself useful instead of worrying.”
Charles accepts the roller reluctantly. Soon you’re both working side by side. Charles takes on the higher parts of the walls that you can’t comfortably reach anymore.
Humming under your breath, you step back to critique your work so far. As you do, your foot catches on the paint tray and you stumble. Charles reaches out to steady you, but not before a fat drop of paint lands on his cheek.
“Oops!” You clap a hand over your mouth, trying not to laugh at the green splotch on his tanned skin.
Charles narrows his eyes in mock indignation. “You think that’s funny, do you?” Before you can react, he flicks his loaded paintbrush at you, spattering your shirt.
You gasp in delighted outrage. “Oh, it is on!” Grabbing your roller, you swipe it down his arm.
Charles lets out a laugh of surprise. Soon paint is flying from both directions. You run around each other, giggling and slipping on the drops coating the floor.
Finally Charles catches you gently by the waist. You’re both absolutely covered in pale green, sides aching from laughter. Your faces are inches apart, smiles fading into something more tender.
Slowly, Charles leans in and presses his lips to yours in the softest, sweetest kiss. You melt against him, hands coming up to cradle his jaw.
When you finally part, Charles rests his forehead against yours. “I’ve wanted to do that for a while,” he confesses, a little breathless.
You smile, heart soaring. “What took you so long?”
His answering grin outshines the sun. There, surrounded by dreams of the future, you share another lingering kiss.
***
You settle back against the mountain of pillows, trying to find a comfortable position for your unwieldy body. At nearly 8 months along now, your belly feels impossibly huge. Luckily Charles’ plush bed offers plenty of space to sprawl.
Speaking of Charles, he appears in the doorway holding a bottle. “Ready for your massage?”
You eye the bottle of oil eagerly. The stretch marks crisscrossing your stomach have been itchy and tight. “Yes please.”
Charles props up pillows behind you so you’re half-reclining. Then he drizzles some of the oil into his palms, warming it up before smoothing his hands over your bump.
You sigh in bliss at his gentle but firm touch. The fragrant oil soothes and softens your irritated skin. Under Charles’ ministrations, the discomfort slowly ebbs away.
His strong hands glide over every inch, easing out the aches and pains. As Charles works, he murmurs to your belly. “There you go, little one. We’re going to make your home nice and cozy.”
Your heart clenches at the tender scene. Even after all these months of living together, it still sometimes hits you how domestic this is. Sharing a home, sharing a bed … it’s everything you secretly longed for but never expected to have. A real family.
You trail your fingers through Charles’ soft waves. His eyes lift to meet yours, soft with affection. The look on his face steals your breath — pure adoration, like you’re the most precious thing in his world.
“I love you.” The words slip out unbidden. Charles’ hands still. For a heartbeat, you’re afraid you’ve said too much.
But then he surges up to capture your lips in a searing kiss. “I love you too,” Charles whispers fiercely when you finally break apart, both panting. “So much.”
He seals his words with another drugging kiss. Your hands clutch him close, heart near bursting with joy.
Suddenly Charles breaks the kiss with a gasp. His wide eyes dart down. “Did you feel that?”
You start to shake your head no, distracted by the sensation of his calloused hands massaging your belly, but then you feel it — a distinct thump against your insides. Your baby shifting and kicking.
Charles’ face lights up. “There it is again!” He laughs in wonder. “The little one is saying hello.”
Happy tears blur your vision. Charles presses a delighted kiss to your stomach. “I can’t wait to meet you,” he whispers tenderly.
Through your tears, you smile at the man you love. The one who gave you and your child a home when you had nothing. However you got here, this is exactly where you’re meant to be.
***
A dull ache starts low in your back as you crawl into bed. You shift and stretch, trying to get comfortable, but can’t seem to. Charles notices your restlessness.
“Alright?” He murmurs sleepily, rolling over to rub your back.
You nod. “Yeah, just some back pain today.” Probably from lugging around this massive belly.
Charles makes soothing noises and continues massaging you until he drifts off. You finally manage to doze too.
Sometime in the night, you jerk awake. The sheets under you are soaked. For one confused moment you think you wet the bed. But then it hits you.
Your water broke.
“Charles!” You shake his shoulder urgently.
He comes awake with a snort. “Huh? What’s wrong?”
“It’s time! The baby-” You break off with a hiss as the first real contraction clenches your belly.
That wakes Charles up fully. “The baby? It’s coming?” He practically falls out of bed, all long limbs flailing.
You have to stifle an inappropriate giggle at his panic. “Yes, so we should-” Your instructions die as Charles sprints from the room. Alright then.
You shake your head in amusement and heave yourself to your feet, one hand braced on your lower back. Waddling slowly after Charles, you find him hyperactively rushing around the living room, tossing items randomly into your hospital bag.
“Okay, let’s go!” He grabs the overflowing bag and dashes out the front door. You stare after him in disbelief then lower yourself carefully onto the couch to wait.
Not thirty seconds later, Charles comes barreling back inside. “Oh God, I forgot you!”
You have to laugh at the panic on his face. “It’s okay. Just breathe.”
Looking marginally calmer, he helps you up, frantically gathering your bag in one hand while keeping the other wrapped around you.
You lean your weight on him during the next contraction, breathing through it. “It’s okay. But we should really go now.”
Charles practically carries you down to the garage and bundles you into his Ferrari in record time. He drives well over the speed limit, one hand clutching yours the whole way.
At the hospital, Charles refuses to leave your side even for a second. He holds the gas and air for you to breathe during contractions, whispering how strong and amazing you are.
When the time comes to push, the pain is unimaginable. You nearly give up, sobbing that you can’t do this. But Charles is there, guiding you through it, telling you that you absolutely can. And with one final scream, your son enters the world.
The shrill cry is the most beautiful sound you’ve ever heard. Charles cuts the cord with trembling hands. Then the nurse lays your wailing, squirmy son on your chest.
You press kisses to his downy head, tears of joy streaming down your face. Charles gazes at you both with pure reverence.
“His name is Matteo Charles,” you whisper. Charles lets out a choked sob at the middle name.
Too soon, the nurses take Matteo for cleaning and checks. One asks Charles if he’d like to hold him. Charles looks to you questioningly, and you nod through your exhaustion.
Charles settles into a chair, shirtless, and Matteo is laid on his bare chest. Charles strokes a gentle finger over Matteo’s cheek, seemingly enraptured.
“Thank you,” he rasps to you. “For our beautiful boy. Thank you, mon amour.”
This is everything you never knew you needed — a family, a home, and an overflowing love you once thought would forever be lost to you. But you’ve found it now, here in this room, together.
***
The sharp cries jolt you from sleep. With a groan, you roll out of the warm circle of Charles’ arms. Your body still aches and protests as you make your way to the nursery in the dark.
Picking up little Matteo, you carry him to the rocker and situate him at your breast. He latches on eagerly, cries fading to soft snuffles.
Charles appears in the doorway, hair adorably mussed. “Everything okay?” He asks through a yawn.
“We’re good now.” You smile tiredly down at your nursing son. His downy hair and scrunched features are all you — you find yourself thankful that there is barely any indication that his biological father even participated in making him.
Charles comes to perch on the ottoman, watching Matteo. “I can’t believe he’s really here,” he murmurs. “Our son.”
Pride swells in your chest. Charles has fully embraced his role as Matteo’s father, as naturally as breathing.
When Matteo finishes eating, Charles takes him to gently pat his back while you right your nightgown. He kisses your son’s head when Matteo lets out a tiny burp.
Back in bed, you curl into Charles with Matteo nestled safely between you. Charles has a race this weekend, his first since the birth. The thought of him leaving fills you with anxiety.
In the morning, Charles confirms your fears. “I’ll just tell Fred I’m not coming this weekend,” he says casually over breakfast. “The team will manage without me. One of the reserve drivers can take over for a few days.”
Your head jerks up. “What? No, Charles, you have to race.”
“But I don’t want to leave you two!” Charles gestures helplessly to where Matteo snoozes in a bouncer.
You catch Charles’ hand. “This is your dream. Matteo and I will be right here cheering you on when you get back.”
Charles wavers. You soften your voice. “It’s only for a little while. We’ll be okay.”
Finally he nods reluctantly. You know how hard this is for him — but Charles was born to race. You won’t let him give that up.
The morning Charles is set to fly out, he clings to you and Matteo like a second skin. You practically have to peel him off at airport security.
“I’ll be back so soon,” he whispers fiercely. One last kiss, and then he’s gone.
The apartment feels empty and too quiet. But you fill the time singing and playing with Matteo, keeping yourself busy until the race.
You and Matteo cuddle close on the couch to watch Charles zoom around the track. Your heart swells with love and pride seeing your man do what he was meant to.
When Charles wins, he shouts his ecstatic thanks to you and Matteo over the team radio. The podium champagne gets sprayed directly into the camera for you.
Finally Charles is home, sweeping you and Matteo into his arms. “I love you both so much,” he murmurs in wonder. You whisper it right back, nestled safe in the arms of your little family.
***
The energy in the Albert Park paddock is electric as teams prepare for the first race of the 2025 season. You feel a thrill just being back, Matteo cooing happily in your arms. At nearly six months old now, he’s ready for his first race.
Charles bounces on his toes, unable to contain his excitement. “Are you ready to see Papa race, Matteo?” He tickles Matteo’s belly, eliciting bubbly giggles.
You head first to the Ferrari garage, where the mechanics crowd around eagerly to fawn over Matteo. Lewis gives you a careful hug, peering curiously at the baby.
“Lewis, meet Matteo,” Charles says proudly. At Lewis’ questioning look, he adds “My son.” The way he says it brooks no argument.
Lewis’ eyes widen slightly but he just smiles. “Hi Matteo!” He offers a finger for Matteo to grip.
Fred comes over next, cooing over how much Matteo has grown. You enjoy the familial atmosphere, everyone fussing over your boy. Matteo basks in the attention.
Charles takes him down to the front of the garage to watch the crews work on the cars. He points out parts of the sleek machines, explaining them seriously to Matteo as if he understands. Matteo just gazes adoringly up at his Papa.
When Charles finally straps into the car for practice, you have ear muffs ready for Matteo’s sensitive ears. Charles blows kisses to you both before pulling on his helmet. Matteo squeals and waves his little fist as the car roars out.
In the hotel that night, you set Matteo on the bed while Charles showers. Stripped down to his diaper, your son kicks his chubby legs excitedly.
Charles emerges in comfy clothes, his hair still damp, and laughs at Matteo’s antics. “Alright, my little race car driver, time for bed.”
He tickles Matteo’s tummy as he puts on a fresh diaper and snaps up his pajamas. Then Charles cradles Matteo close, humming softly as he sways back and forth to soothe him. Your heart clenches at the tender scene.
Once Matteo is deeply asleep, Charles lays him gently in the travel crib. He turns to you with a soft smile. “I can’t imagine life without him now.”
You slip your arms around Charles from behind. “He loves his Papa so much already. Your biggest fan.”
Charles covers your hands with his, gazing at Matteo. “I’m going to win tomorrow for him.”
And he does. On the podium, Charles looks down to where you cradle Matteo in one arm, and gently showers you with champagne. Matteo’s delighted laughter is the sweetest sound.
This is everything you’ve ever wanted.
***
The energetic buzz of the Italian Grand Prix washes over you as you stroll hand-in-hand with Charles, your son cradled safely in his arms. At nearly a year old now, Matteo is fascinated by the vivid colors and cacophony of sounds surrounding him.
Charles playfully bounces Matteo as you weave through the crowded walkways, pointing out the sights and sounds. “Look Matteo, there’s the cars! Vroom vroom!” Charles mimics the roar of an engine. Matteo’s delighted giggle melts your heart. You can’t help but grin, chest swelling with love and pride for your little family.
You’ve just about reached the looming Ferrari motorhome when an absolutely venomous female voice shrieks out, “You!”
Every muscle in your body instantly tenses. You freeze mid-step, heart lurching into your throat. Whipping your head around, you see an immaculately dressed woman barreling directly towards you, her face mottled an ugly shade of rage-induced crimson.
“You disgusting harlot!” The woman spits with unrestrained fury. “You filthy whore!”
Stunned, you instinctively take a faltering step backwards, nearly stumbling. Charles’ strong arm immediately wraps protectively around you and Matteo, steadying you. His body angles partly in front of yours and Matteo’s smaller form, shielding you both on pure instinct.
The deranged woman continues her tirade, advancing until she’s nearly screaming in your face. “Oh, I know exactly who you are, you reprehensible little homewrecker!”
Before you can even begin to formulate a response, a ghost from your past suddenly materializes behind the enraged woman. A man you hoped to never lay eyes on again.
His eyes blow wide at the sight of you, Charles, and the infant cradled against Charles’ chest.
The woman — his wife, you realize with dawning horror — grabs viciously onto his arm, her razor-sharp nails digging in hard enough to leave crescent-shaped gouges. “Just look at her!” She shrieks, spit flying from her mouth. “Parading that little bastard child around like it’s something to be proud of!” She violently thrusts her finger towards Matteo, still safely ensconced in Charles’ embrace.
Your son, sensing the onslaught of hostile energy, immediately begins wailing in distress. You instinctively reach out to take him from Charles, desperate to comfort your frightened boy. But Charles subtly shifts his stance, moving further out of her reach, as he focuses intently on gently bouncing and shushing Matteo in an attempt to calm him.
Matteo’s biological father simply stares, slack-jawed, at the sobbing infant. The gears visibly turn in his head. “Is that ...” he chokes out, “Is he … mine?”
“No.” Charles’ immediate response is biting and unequivocal. He clutches Matteo tighter to his chest. “Matteo is my son.” Though his voice remains steady, you can see a muscle in his jaw ticking from the effort of holding back more heated words.
But Dario clearly does not accept this response. His eyes narrow calculatingly as he continues scrutinizing the wailing baby. Behind him, his unhinged wife keeps up her tirade of slurs and accusations, whipping the gathering crowd into greater frenzy.
You feel lightheaded, paralyzed. This is a living nightmare. Distantly you are aware of camera phones pointed your way, capturing every wretched moment. Charles seems to realize the same, his handsome face darkening with rage.
With frightening efficiency, Charles strides directly over to the nearest paddock security officers and has a brief, terse exchange. Moments later, two bulky guards firmly take hold of the still-screaming woman and shellshocked man, forcefully escorting them away. The crowd reluctantly disperses, murmuring.
Charles immediately returns to envelope you and Matteo in a fiercely protective embrace. “It’s alright now, you’re both safe,” he soothes, though his rapid heartbeat belies his calm words. Matteo’s panicked sobs have faded to tiny hiccups against Charles’ neck.
The rest of the chaotic day passes in a blur. Much later, in the privacy of your hotel room, Charles reveals that he pulled every string and called in every favor necessary to have Dario and his deranged wife permanently blacklisted from all Formula 1 events.
His voice shakes with quiet rage as he describes how close security came to needing to restrain him physically.
Finally he takes your face so very gently in his hands. “I promise you, I will do anything and everything to protect our family. You and Matteo are my entire world. Nothing will ever hurt you as long as I’m breathing.”
Overwhelmed with gratitude, you collapse against his solid chest. Charles’ strong arms anchor you in place as you cling to him. He continues murmuring fervent assurances, pressing kisses to your hair.
Despite the ugliness of the day, you know with utter certainty Charles will shield you and Matteo from the darkness of your past. Your family is still perfection in your eyes.
***
“Papa, I wanna be a race car driver like you when I grow up!”
Your five-year-old son looks up at Charles with big, adoring eyes as he makes this pronouncement over breakfast one morning.
Charles freezes with his coffee cup halfway to his mouth. He slowly sets it down, gazing at Matteo with surprise and pride. “You do?”
Matteo bobs his curly head eagerly. “Yeah! I wanna drive fast cars and win like you! Can you teach me?”
Charles melts, ruffling Matteo’s hair. “Of course, buddy. We’ll have to convince your maman first though.” He shoots you a meaningful look.
You shift uncertainly. Of course you want to encourage Matteo’s interests, but motorsport is dangerous ...
Charles seems to sense your hesitation. “Why don’t you think about it, mon amour? No need to decide yet.” He winks at Matteo, who grins in excitement.
Over the next few days, your two boys put on a full court press to sway you. Charles points out safety advances in karting and helps Matteo make adorable PowerPoint slides with photos of your son in race helmets. They both unleash heartbreaking puppy dog eyes.
Finally you cave. “Alright!” You laugh, holding up your hands in surrender. “You can start teaching him the basics.”
Matteo and Charles high-five so hard it makes a cracking sound. “Yesss!” Charles pumps his fists while Matteo dances in glee. Seeing their matching enthusiasm melts away the last of your reluctance. Your little daredevil was born for this.
The next weekend, Charles takes Matteo to a racetrack an hour outside the city. It’s just a small circuit, but Matteo gazes around with wide eyes, gripping Charles’ hand tightly.
Charles shows him the karts and safety gear, patiently explaining how everything works. Then it’s time. Charles helps strap Matteo into a kart made for kids, snugging his helmet gently under the chin.
“Ready, mon petit champion?”
Matteo gives him a thumbs up, practically vibrating with excitement. Charles grins and drops the visor down. “Alright! Let’s do this!”
He gives Matteo a little push to get the kart rolling onto the track. Your son quickly gets the hang of working the gas and brakes. Charles jogs alongside, gesturing and calling out instructions.
Gradually he lets Matteo take full control. Your little boy zips around the course, hair blowing out the back of his helmet. His delighted laughter echoes around the circuit.
Watching from the sidelines, Charles records it all on his phone, face alight with joy and pride. “That’s it Matteo, you’re doing amazing!” He cheers.
This is only the beginning. But seeing the utter bliss on both their faces, you know Matteo has chosen the right path. The Leclerc legacy will live on.
***
“I’m here in the pit lane with Charles Leclerc on the momentous day his son, Matteo Leclerc, makes his highly anticipated debut with Scuderia Ferrari. Charles, you must be incredibly proud right now.”
The Sky Sports reporter holds her mic out to Charles as he stands, beaming, in front of the scarlet Ferrari garage. Charles nods, looking slightly choked up.
“Incredibly proud doesn’t even begin to cover it,” he replies earnestly. “This has been Matteo’s dream since he was just a little boy. To see him achieve it, to be standing here watching him drive for the team I devoted my life to … it’s indescribable.”
Charles pauses, glancing over fondly at where you stand with Matteo, straightening your son’s helmet and race suit.
“His mother and I, we’ve worried and experienced every up and down along the way with him. But Matteo has worked so hard for this, never gave up even when it seemed impossible. He more than deserves today.”
The reporter smiles. “And his last name isn’t the only way he takes after you. Matteo is widely considered your protégé after you mentored him through the junior ranks.”
“I taught him everything I could,” Charles acknowledges. “But his talent and dedication are all his own. Matteo is his own man now. I can’t wait to see how high he continues to climb.”
“Any advice you’ve given him before his first race with Ferrari?”
Charles chuckles. “Just to enjoy every second. This only comes around once.” He looks off into the distance, eyes crinkling nostalgically.
“Still seems like yesterday I was in his shoes for my own Ferrari debut. I’ll never forget that feeling.”
The reporter wraps up the interview and Charles makes his way over to where you and 21-year-old Matteo are embracing. Charles’ eyes shine with unshed tears as he clasps arms with his son.
“I’m so proud of you,” Charles says hoarsely. “Your mother and I both. Now go show the world what you can do.”
Matteo’s answering smile is blinding. “I’ll make you proud, Papa.”
He hugs you tight, then pulls on his helmet and strides confidently to his waiting Ferrari. The mechanics cheer as the car roars to life and Matteo peels out onto the track, on the cusp of achieving his lifelong dream.
You cling to Charles’ side, waving tearfully. “Our little boy,” you whisper in awe.
Charles wraps an arm around you, never taking his eyes off the bright red car. “He’s all grown up. But he’ll always be our son.”
No matter how high Matteo climbs, Charles knows he will always remain his sweet little boy — the bright-eyed child you and Charles raised with love.
His greatest source of pride and joy as the future beckons brightly, another generation of Leclercs carrying the hopes of Ferrari forward.
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rafecameronssl4t · 16 days ago
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Chosen || Rafe Cameron x fem!reader (love island au)
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Summary: (lil backstory) you and Rafe have been a couple since day one and are pretty closed off but a new bombshell has come and chose Rafe for a date and now it’s time for her to choose who she wants to couple up with.
Warnings: angst
Word count: 2,070
A/n: Inspired by the whole ordeal between rob liv and leah in love island usa lol SECOND PART IS HERE
MASTERLIST
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divider by @h-aewo
The villa was buzzing with the usual pre-recoupling jitters, and as you sat at your vanity, carefully applying the final touches of makeup, you heard Rafe’s voice echo down the hallway. “Babe,” he called out, his tone relaxed yet filled with that casual affection you’d grown to love. “Yeah, I’m in here!” you responded, smiling to yourself.
Through the mirror, you caught the familiar image of him entering, his sandy-blonde hair tousled, sun-kissed skin accentuating the sharp angles of his face. Your eyes met in the mirror, and the edges of his mouth softened into a smile that made your heart flutter.
“You okay?” he asked, stepping closer and bending down to press a gentle kiss to your shoulder, lingering just long enough to make you feel like he was truly checking in. “Yeah, why wouldn’t I be?” you chuckled, meeting his eyes in the mirror with a playful glint. He watched your reflection intently, as if trying to read your every expression.
“Just making sure,” he murmured, pulling a chair up beside yours. He settled in, crossing his arms, his gaze steady as he watched you apply the last bit of powder. You raised an eyebrow, feigning a casual tone. “Why? Should I be worried? Is there something you’re not telling me about your date with Kayla?” You smirked, trying to keep it light, but deep down, you were fishing for any reassurance you could get.
His hand found its way to your thigh, his grip warm and reassuring as his thumb brushed soothing circles. “No, of course not,” he said, his tone calm yet firm. “I told you everything, and, honestly, I don’t think she’ll pick me. We don’t have that spark—you and I do, though, yeah?” His eyes held yours, his expression open and genuine.
His gaze was steady, his smile reassuring, and despite the flicker of insecurity, you let out a slow breath, his words sinking in and soothing the lingering doubts in the back of your mind. “Okay,” you said finally, a genuine smile breaking through as he chuckled.
“You’re adorable, you know that?” he said, leaning in to press a series of soft kisses along your bare shoulder making you giggle, a genuine, unrestrained laugh that he seemed to crave as he pulled back, grinning. “What are you wearing tonight?” he asked, scanning the room with an approving gaze as his eyes landed on the green dress you’d laid out on the armchair nearby.
“That one.” You nodded toward the dress, and he hummed, his smile widening in approval. “Good choice. It’s gonna drive the others crazy.” “Glad you think so,” you replied, warmth creeping into your cheeks as you noticed the way he looked at you—like you were the only person who existed.
“Well, I’ll let you get ready,” he said, standing up and moving behind you. Through the mirror, you caught yourself staring. How could you not when Rafe looked so... edible. He met your gaze in the mirror, catching your look, and smirked. “Like what you see, Mrs. Cameron?” he teased, his voice dropping to a playful, almost dangerous tone that made you laugh.
“Very much,” you replied, tilting your head back as he leaned down, catching your lips in a kiss that was both soft and full of promise, a reminder of the bond that the two of you had since day one. But before things could get too heated, you gently placed a hand on his jaw, pushing him back with a giggle.
“Alright, alright, I’m going!” he said, chuckling as he stepped back. Before he could leave, the door opened, and you both turned to see Kayla enter, her eyes lighting up at the sight of Rafe. “Hey,” Rafe greeted her casually, his tone polite but distant. You watched them exchange brief smiles before looking away, busying yourself with your lip gloss as Kayla approached her drawers.
“Hey, Y/n,” she greeted you brightly, her tone friendly as she settled beside you. “Hey,” you replied with a polite smile. “Excited for tonight?” “Oh, definitely!” she exclaimed, her eyes sparkling with excitement. “I’m so ready to sleep next to someone again; it’s been way too long.” She giggled, and you chuckled in response, keeping the mood light even as you fought off a pang of unease.
“Do you know who you’re choosing?” you asked, carefully applying your lip gloss as she fiddled with something in her drawer. She nodded confidently, her fingers tapping lightly as she glanced at you with a knowing smile. “Uh-huh. I knew who I was gonna pick the second I walked in here.”
You nodded, hoping your expression didn’t betray the subtle tightening in your chest. It was in these little moments that the villa’s intensity hit, the constant swirl of emotions and unspoken fears. But as you caught a glimpse of your own reflection, you reminded yourself of the quiet confidence in Rafe’s words, of the unspoken bond you’d built.
~
The night air felt thick with tension as everyone gathered around the firepit, the familiar crackling flames casting flickering shadows across the group. You sat beside Rafe, his arm draped casually over your shoulders. The warmth of his touch had been a quiet comfort, his thumb tracing soothing patterns along your skin—a small reassurance that whatever happened tonight, he was there.
But as Kayla’s voice broke through the murmur of anticipation, her words twisted the air around you, each one slicing deeper than the last. "I'm coupling up with this person because, from the moment we started talking, I definitely sensed that we had potential and that there was a spark there that I want to explore," Kayla said, her tone confident and unwavering as her gaze locked on the group.
Your eyes dropped to the flames, heart pounding, silently willing her words to be about someone else. When she finally spoke his name, “The person I want to couple up with is… Rafe,” the world seemed to freeze. Your breath hitched, and a wave of shock washed over you, cold and biting, despite the warmth of the firepit. Around you, a few gasps broke the silence, the girls’ faces mirroring the same surprise that you felt.
Your eyes darted to Kayla, disbelief clouding your expression, and then turned to Rafe, who sat motionless beside you, his face an unreadable mask as he stared blankly at the ground. “Really? Nothing to worry about?” you said, your voice low but sharp, brushing his arm off your shoulder. Anger surged through you, raw and uncontainable. You’d trusted him, taken his reassurances at face value.
And now, every promise felt like it had shattered between you. Rafe’s shoulders slumped slightly as he raked a hand through his hair, a long sigh escaping his lips as he shook his head. “Rafe, you look surprised at Kayla's decision,” the host, Sophie commented , looking at him expectantly. He hesitated, his gaze finally flickering up to meet Kayla’s. “Yeah, uh—I don’t know what to say, really,” he mumbled, the frown deepening across his face.
“I thought I made it clear that I wasn’t really interested,” he shrugged, but his words felt hollow to you, hanging in the tense air between him and Kayla. Kayla’s eyes flashed with indignation, and she crossed her arms, a hint of challenge in her expression. “Wow, yeah—that’s not how I felt during our date,” she said with a pointed look, and you felt a pang of betrayal twist in your stomach as her words settled over you.
The whole night, the small reassurances Rafe had given you, the gestures, the closeness—it all felt tainted. Sophie's voice cuts through, pulling you from the storm of emotions swirling within you. “Well, Kayla, if you could switch places with Y/n… and Y/n, if you could come stand beside me.” Standing, you avoided looking at Rafe or Kayla, the weight of the moment pressing down on you.
You forced yourself to breathe as you stepped away from the firepit, feeling the collective gaze of the group on you. “Y/n, you are now single, which leaves you vulnerable here on Love Island,” Sophie announced. You nodded slowly, your jaw tight as you bit down on your bottom lip, desperately holding back the flood of emotions welling inside you.
Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Rafe looking anywhere but at you, his gaze flickering across the ground as if trying to distance himself from the situation. The sense of betrayal weighed heavily on you, every unspoken word thickening the air between you. As soon as Sophie left, the girls immediately swarmed around you, their arms linking through yours as they ushered you away from the firepit and into the makeup room.
“Unbelievable,” you muttered to Sofia, who gave you a sympathetic squeeze. “Honestly, you deserve so much better than that,” she whispered, her hand rubbing comforting circles on your back.
~
Rafe’s voice was soft but strained as he appeared behind you, his presence looming uncertainly. “Can we please talk?” His tone was laced with a vulnerability you weren’t used to seeing in him. His gaze drifted to your face, catching the redness around your eyes, the remnants of tears. You sighed, dabbing away the traces of mascara that had smudged beneath your eyes.
“I don’t think there’s much to talk about, Rafe.” You shrugged, brushing him off as you tried to compose yourself. “Y/n, please,” he insisted, the desperation in his voice tugging at the edges of your anger. “I swear to god, I was making it crystal clear that I wasn’t interested. I told her, over and over, that I was in a happy situation with you.”
You felt the flicker of an ache under your ribs, a small crack in the wall you’d put up. “Then why, Rafe?” Your voice rose, bitterness spilling over. “Why did she pick you? She wouldn’t have done that out of the blue if she didn’t think there was something real, something genuine, between you two.” Your words struck him, and he took a small step back, almost flinching.
He opened his mouth as if to argue but stopped, as if suddenly unsure. “I don’t know why she chose me,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. “But you have to believe me, Y/n. None of this meant anything to me—she doesn’t mean anything to me.” He looked at you, and for a split second, you caught something raw, almost pleading, in his expression.
But the anger and the hurt still clouded your heart. You shook your head, exhaustion coating your words. “I’m just… I’m really tired, Rafe. I just want to go to bed.” You didn’t meet his eyes, the weight of the evening pressing down on you. He paused, the silence stretching painfully between you both. “Right. Good night, then,” he murmured, his voice tinged with a sadness that lingered in the air as he turned and left.
By the time you walked into the bedroom, Sofia was already there, her arms opening for you without a word. You melted into her embrace, the comfort of her support soothing your frazzled nerves. “You’ll be okay,” she whispered, squeezing you tightly before you finally pulled away, giving her a small, grateful smile.
As you made your way to your bed, your gaze involuntarily flickered to Kayla’s. She lay there, already settled in, Rafe’s pillow on the other side, and it made your stomach churn. You slipped into bed, laying in the center, feeling an aching emptiness beside you. Rafe should have been there. His warmth, his steady breathing as you fell asleep, had been a constant.
Then, as if on cue Rafe walked into the room. His eyes skimmed over you for a second before he headed toward Kayla’s bed. The air was thick with unspoken words, unacknowledged feelings, and for a moment, you wanted to reach out, to say something, but you held back, the bitterness fresh in your chest. Rafe leaned over, whispering something to Kayla, though you couldn’t make out the words.
Then, without warning, he grabbed his pillow, stepping away from her bed and heading out of the room. You caught Sofia’s gaze across the dimly lit space, her knowing look meeting your own. She offered a small smile of understanding, and you returned it faintly before letting your eyes drift shut, hoping sleep would bring a break from all the emotions.
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soaps-mohawk · 9 months ago
Text
Cherry Red, Crimson Blood
Chapter 10: Treat Me Gently
Summary: You and Price take your relationship to the next level. It might be the best decision you've ever made.
Pairing: Poly 141 x reader
Warnings: NSFW, 18+, smut, p in v sex, fingering, oral, first time sex, unprotected(ish) sex, reader has an implant, creampie, Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, Alternate Universe, a/b/o typical classism and sexism, military inaccuracies, language, the author is a bit rusty writing smut.
A/N: It's finally here. It's finally arrived, the moment we've all been waiting for! Uh, yeah, it's mostly badly written smut with just a little plot thrown in there. So...I hope you enjoy!
MASTERLIST | <- Previous | Next ->
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Your attention is pulled from your book as the couch sinks on either side of you, two bodies joining you. You glance up from your book as an arm drapes itself across the back of the couch behind you. Your eyes flicker between Gaz and Johnny, mischievous grins on their faces. 
“We heard you have a date this weekend.” Gaz says, leaning in closer. 
Your face warms at his words. “Well, I don’t know if I’d call it a date...” 
“What are you wearing?” Gaz asks. 
“Do ye have anythin’ to wear?” Johnny asks. 
Their questions give you pause. The most formal thing you have are jeans and, though you doubt Price would care if you showed up in sweatpants, you would like to have something nice to wear. 
“Come on.” Gaz says, slapping your thigh before standing. “We’re going shopping.” 
“What?” You glance between him and Johnny as they stand over you. 
“Already got permission from Price.” Johnny says. “So come on.” He grabs your hands, lifting you to your feet easily. “Let’s get goin’, kitten.” 
Your cheeks warm at the pet name, Johnny’s hand settling on your lower back to steer you from the rec room. You don’t have much of a choice but to follow, grabbing a couple things from your room before you leave the barracks with them to a car parked outside. It’s different from the car you and Price had taken to town last weekend. Of course, they probably all have their own vehicles, or at least a few at their disposal. 
“I’m driving.” Gaz says, plucking the keys from Johnny’s hand. 
“Aww, ye never let me drive!” Johnny pouts. 
“Yeah, because with our luck you’ll traumatize her so badly, she’ll never want to leave again.” Gaz says, opening the driver’s side door. 
You can’t help but giggle at the dejected look on Johnny’s face as you get into the back, Johnny muttering the entire way to the passenger side. 
“I’m no’ that bad of a driver.” Johnny says, buckling his seatbelt. 
“Yeah, but both you and Simon seem to be in agreement that the speed limit is a suggestion, not a law.” Gaz says as he turns on the car. “I’d like to make it there and back in one piece, thank you. Besides, Price would have both our heads if anything happened to our girl on our watch.”
Your cheeks warm as you meet Gaz's gaze through the rear view mirror. Your heart flutters at the look in his eyes, the dedication and protectiveness shining in them. 
“I wouldnae let anything happen to ye.” Johnny says, reaching back to squeeze your knee for a moment. 
You stare out the window of the car as Gaz drives towards town, half listening to the conversation in the front seat. You're beginning to recognize landmarks, buildings, areas between the base and town despite it only being your second trip. They'd be proud of you, you think. At least if something happened, you'd be able to give a landmark. 
The farmlands fade into the city and soon Gaz is parking on the street in front of a shop. You take Gaz's hand as he helps you out of the car, lacing your fingers together. Soap holds the door to the shop open, letting you and Gaz walk through first. 
It's a nice boutique filled with all sorts of formal wear. You wonder how they even knew about this place, or if they had done some research beforehand. Both make you feel honored that they would even go to those lengths just for you. 
They are going to be your pack soon. 
Packs do this sort of thing for each other. They take care of each other, spoil each other, make each other happy. It’s hard to be a good pack if one member is unhappy. 
“Good afternoon.” One of the workers approaches you. “My name is Emily. Is there something I can help you find today?” 
“Our omega has a date with our alpha this weekend.” Gaz says, smiling down at you. “She needs something to wear.” 
The worker, Emily, smiles at you. “How exciting! Did you have anything in mind? Style, color, anything like that?”
“Probably nothing too fancy,” You say, eyeing the racks. “And, probably a dress.”
“Alright, we've got lots of options for that. Let's take a look and you can try some on.” Emily says. 
Gaz keeps hold of your hand as you follow Emily through the racks, looking at some of the options. Johnny goes off on his own, perusing the racks himself. 
“Is there a certain color you have in mind?” Emily asks you.
You hum in contemplation, looking at the many racks. You're not sure what color Price would like, or if he even has a favorite. 
“His favorite color is blue, like a dark navy blue.” Johnny answers for you. “Though, I think he'd like you in any color.” 
You can't help the way your cheeks warm a bit at Johnny's words. You realize you don't even know their favorite colors. There's still so much about them that's a mystery to you. 
“What's your favorite color?” You ask, looking up at Gaz. 
“I don't think I have just one.” He says, running his hand over a sequin covered dress on the rack in front of you “I like warm colors. Reds, oranges, purples.”
“Like a sunset.” You say, looking at a tag on one of the dresses, nearly choking at the price. 
Gaz gently removes the tag from your hand, giving you a look as you meet his gaze. “Don't even worry about it, love.” He says quietly, leaning down to kiss your cheek. 
“My favorite color is green.” Johnny says, appearing next to you suddenly. 
“Let me guess, Ghost’s is black.” You say. 
Johnny's mouth twitches. “Now how'd you come to guess that?” 
You shrug, unable to hide your grin. “Call it intuition.” 
Emily takes you to the changing rooms, the boys taking seats outside to wait for you to try on the dresses you've chosen so far. You pick a sleeveless, blue, knee-length dress first with a ruched skirt. You already don't like it, but you know the guys will want to see it regardless. 
You feel nervous, strangely exposed as you step out of the dressing room and make your way to where the guys are sitting. They both straighten up as you approach, Johnny’s eyes immediately on your legs. Gaz let's out a low whistle as his eyes scan your figure, ending on your legs as well. 
“What?” You ask concerned as you stare down at your own legs thinking the worst, like how you might have missed a spot shaving or something. 
“Nothin’ love,” Gaz says, unable to lift his gaze from your legs. “Just never seen you in anything but long pants before.”
Your cheeks warm at his words. It's true, the climate had yet to allow for anything but long pants. Even to sleep, you found yourself too cold without long sleep pants. 
“Christ, you've got gorgeous legs, kitten.” Soap says, letting his eyes trail your form. “Keepin’ those hidden from us?” 
Your face feels like it's on fire as they stare at you, and quickly turn to face the large mirror across from them in an attempt to steady the butterflies in your stomach. 
“What do you think?” Emily asks, stepping up next to you. 
“It's a little too...churchy for a date.” You say smoothing your hands over the skirt. “Definitely need something fancier than this.”
You try on a few of the others, but none of them are right. Too short, too long, too formal, not formal enough. Johnny brings you more to try, a couple sticking out, but you're not sold on any of them. 
The last dress you have yet to try on catches your eye as you pull it off the hook. It's a deep blue color, almost black. It's long sleeved and covers your front entirely, but the back is open. It's short, the skirt hem long enough to cover your ass, but you wouldn't dare bend over. It hugs your figure, accentuating the curves and lines of your body. 
Your cheeks are warm as you step out of the changing room, both Gaz and Johnny going slack-jawed as they stare at you. Even Emily looks in awe as you stand in front of them. 
“I think you've found the one, love.” Gaz says, his eyes trailing your form. “Give us a spin.”
You do a slow turn, not missing the way their eyes widen in the mirror when they see the back, Johnny still frozen as you turn back to face them. 
“How do you feel?” Emily asks, stepping up to you. 
“Good.” You say, your face still warm. “Really good.”
“Yeah,” She says, looking you over. “I think you've hit the mark with this one. Let me grab shoes and we'll put the whole look together.”
You turn to face the mirror as she steps away, your eyes meeting Gaz's as he steps up to you. 
“You look fantastic, love.” He says, leaning in close over your shoulder, his breath fanning your ear. Goosebumps form on your skin as his fingers slowly trail up the line of your spine. “Price is going to want to devour you instantly as soon as he sees you in this one.”
You shiver at his words, biting your lip as his fingers splay out across your upper back. “You think so?”
There's a mischievous glint in his eyes as he holds your gaze through the mirror. “He won't be able to keep his hands off you. Gonna drive him insane, making him sit through dinner looking like a delicious dessert.” 
You fear you might start smoking from how warm you feel, glad for Emily's reappearance. You try on the shoes she brings, opting for the shorter heels for the sake of your own dignity. 
Johnny distracts you as Gaz pays for the items, spending far too much on you but neither will let you complain. It's what they're supposed to do. 
They are your pack after all. 
“What about lingerie?” Johnny asks, turning to look at you as you sit in the car. 
Your face burns at his question. You hadn't thought about that bit. 
“Gotta dress up the whole fit.” He wiggles his eyebrows at you. 
“Lay off her, perv.” Gaz says, smacking Johnny's chest. “He's right though, gotta make sure the whole outfit matches.”
You feel like you might implode in the backseat. You might not make it to Saturday at this rate. 
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You wake early on Saturday. You don't have to be up early. There's nothing going on until tonight, no need for you to rise earlier than the sun. Yet, you can't help the anticipation burning in your stomach, the nervous fluttering in your chest. Tonight you're going to sleep with Price for the first time. Tonight you'll allow him closer than you've ever allowed anyone. 
You have an outfit, you have fancy underwear, even new shoes. You're not sure how you want to wear your hair. You're not sure on makeup either, though Price has seen you plenty without it and has yet to offer any complaints. 
You grab your phone, laying in bed and scrolling hair tutorials until the sun comes up and you start hearing movement in the hallway. You don’t bother changing, pulling on shoes before stepping out. You are hungry, even after spending half the day in town and eating dinner out with Gaz and Johnny yesterday. You slip out the door, coming face to face with Ghost. You tilt your head back, staring up at him. 
“Didn’t expect to see you.” He grumbles. “Figured you’d be busy getting ready.” 
“I’ve got like ten hours until I have to be ready.” You say, blinking up at him. “It doesn’t take that long.” 
He lets out a huff, rolling his eyes. “Come on.” 
You follow him out of the barracks, but you find yourself not having to speed walk quite as fast to keep up with him today. 
“Are you upset?” You ask, kicking up your pace a bit so you can walk side by side with him. 
“About what?” He asks. 
“Price and I.” You say. 
“Why would I be?” He sounds genuinely baffled that you’re asking him. 
You shrug. “You’re an alpha in the pack too, and I didn’t really ask anyone but Price.” 
“Price is your alpha.” He says, as if it’s the most straightforward thing in the world. He’s not wrong, Price is the only one that really matters when it comes to you, since he’s the pack alpha, and he’ll be the one claiming you. 
“Would you ever want to be?” You ask, looking up at him. 
He meets your gaze as he opens the door to the mess, not answering as you slip into the hall. He stands closer to you than he normally does as you get in line for food, tailing you like a shadow as you find Johnny among the drowsy and hungover soldiers in the mess. 
You take a seat across from him, Ghost taking his spot next to Johnny. You can feel the nerves beginning to take hold as you eat, thinking about your date tonight. It’s not like you really have to impress Price much, though you suppose you could make him dislike you rather easily. You’d rather avoid that situation, as there’s no getting out of mating and being claimed by him. You’re going to be part of his pack whether he likes you or not. 
What if he finds you boring? You’re not even sure what you could talk about. It’s not like you do much, and he already knows most everything he can about you. The only thing you have to talk about are things you’d rather not discuss during your first date. You’d prefer not to discuss them at all. 
“You’ll be fine.” Johnny says as you walk back to the barracks. “Just get ‘im talking, and ye won’t need tae worry about gettin’ a word in yourself.” 
Johnny’s words do make you giggle. You’re sure Price has so much more to talk about than you do. You barely know anything about him in general. 
It’s ironic that you’re more nervous about dinner than you are about the fact Price is going to take your virginity tonight. 
You did ask for this. It’ll be good, getting to know him before your heat starts. The idea of going through your heat with a virtual stranger is terrifying to you, and Price had so willingly offered to do this so that doesn’t happen, so you feel more comfortable with being mated and claimed by someone you at least somewhat know. This is your chance to get to know your pack alpha, your alpha before you’re forced to. This is your chance to make your own decision, to have some control over a life that’s been dictated for you this far. 
You spend the morning in a nervous panic, looking up tips online, tutorials, possible questions he might ask and thinking up answers that will make you sound interesting at least. Answers that won’t just be parroting things that he already knows. Gaz brings you lunch, letting you continue to prepare for your date, knowing the chances of you having a breakdown if you’re forced around people are high right now. 
You give yourself ample time to get ready, showering and moisturizing, making sure you smell clean and look nice. You do your hair, taking your time to make yourself look decent. You opt for minimal make up, wanting to make yourself seem like you at least put a little effort into your looks. 
You're strapping on your shoes when the knock comes at the door. Six o'clock sharp, just as you expected. You take a deep breath, adjusting your dress before you open the door.
John is standing on the other side, dressed in a button up shirt and slacks. You look him over, the fresh scent of cologne reaching your nose. His eyes rake your form, his scent slipping through the cologne as his gaze darkens a bit. Gaz was right. He does look like he wants to devour you. 
“You clean up nicely.” You say, looking him over again. His shirt hugs his muscles nicely, his pants obviously tailored to fit him. You haven't seen him in anything but fatigues and civilian clothes so far. 
“Was going to say the same to you.” He says, lips pulling up into a smile. “You look beautiful, sweetheart.” 
Your cheeks warm at the compliment. “Thank you.”
“Hungry?” He asks, offering you an arm. 
“Always.” You say, taking his arm, letting him lead you towards the rec room. 
The lights inside are dimmed, the table usually reserved for games set up with a tablecloth and candles, along with two plates covered with cloches, and a bottle of wine. You're not sure when he managed to procure the wine, or maybe he had it saved and decided this was as good a time as any. 
“Wow.” You say, impressed by the effort he obviously put into everything. 
“I bribed the boys out of here for a few hours.” He says, leading you to the table. “Wasn't easy.”
“I bet.” You say, sitting down in one of the chairs, letting him push it in for you. 
He pours you both glasses of wine before taking the cloches off the plates. You blink in surprise at the meal on the plate. Spaghetti, a salad, and bread. It's so simple, yet it takes you right back to weeknight dinners at home. 
“You made this?” You ask as he takes the seat across from you. 
He nods. “I've amassed many skills over the years. I'm no five star chef, but I can throw things together in a pinch.”
“Well it looks good.” You say, picking up your fork. 
It tastes good too. It's so simple, yet it's one of the best things you've eaten in the last month. You miss a lot of things about America, and the food is starting to be one of those. 
You and John make small talk as you eat, the wine warming your body and easing your nerves. 
“How long has it been,” You ask him as you clear your plate. “Since you were with an omega last?”
“Two years.” He says, taking a sip of wine. 
Your eyes widen in surprise. You know they've been with omegas in the past, taking advantage of barrack bunnies and the swaths of willing omegas you know populate near military bases. You just hadn't thought it would be that far back in the past.
“Right around the time the task force was created.” He continues. “We were too busy bonding and working on the task force, by the time we had a moment long enough for anything like that, we didn't need them anymore.”
“That must have been torture.” You say, staring at him wide eyed. 
“We're trained for that sort of thing.” He says with a smile. “How to fight off those urges, those needs. When you're in the field, something like that could get you killed. You don't pass selection into the SAS until you can show mastery over those skills.”
“Damn.” You say, taking a sip of your wine. “Still, it couldn't have been easy.”
“It can be hard, once you've been with an omega, to go without. But that's just part of the job.” 
“Well, I suppose that's partly why I'm here.” You say, huffing out a laugh. 
“Perhaps.” He says. “I'm certain we're not getting the full story.”
The double meaning isn't lost on you. There's a lot they don't know about you, things that are safer buried deep where they can't hurt anyone. Things you'd like to keep buried for the rest of time. 
“It’s nothing...bad is it?” You ask, searching his gaze. 
“I’d like to think not,” He says. 
But... 
You don’t need to hear him say it. You know it’s there, lingering at the end of that statement. You wonder how many times he’s been in these situations, forced to place blind trust in someone and hope they have the best intentions in mind. You’re all too familiar with those sorts of situations. Putting blind trust in strangers was your life purpose as soon as you presented as an omega. 
“We’re not going to let anything happen to you.” He says, staring at you with such conviction you can’t help but believe him. “You’re part of our pack, which makes you part of this team, even if bureaucracy says otherwise. We take care of each other, and that includes you. You’re our omega, regardless of whatever the endgame is for this initiative.” 
You feel almost breathless at his words, at his declaration of loyalty to you. You know how much loyalty means to someone like him, the kind of promise words like that uphold. They’d give their lives to defend you. You’d fight to defend them too, if it came down to it. Not that you could do much, but you’d try. 
“You’re my omega.” John says, reaching across the table to take your hand in his. “I take care of what's mine.”
You nod, trying to fight the tears welling in your eyes. “I know. You've...you've been a better alpha than I could have ever hoped for. Despite everything you've been kind and caring and understanding. I know some things we learned at the institute weren’t right, but...I was expecting a lot worse.”
His thumb draws circles on the back of your hand, his fingers gently squeezing yours. “I'm glad I could prove that wrong. I know this situation is weird and less than ideal, but I fear I'll have to tell Kate she was right. She did pick a good omega.”
You smile, preening a bit under his praise. “That’s all I can try to be.” 
“You can be so much more than that.” He says, lifting your hand to his lips. His beard tickles your skin as he presses a line of kisses across the back of your hand before turning it, kissing across your palm to your wrist. He presses his nose against the skin there, inhaling deeply. “You’re sure, about tonight?” 
Your fingers brush his cheek as he holds your hand against his face. Your heart is thudding your throat at the proximity, those nervous flutters starting in your stomach again. He’s giving you an out, a chance to take back what you had asked for. You know he wouldn’t blame you. He was more than willing to wait for your heat to start, for when you had no choice, when it would mean less because you would be desperate and needy for him. 
You don’t want that, though. You want him to want you before his instincts tell him he does. You want to know he’s not just fulfilling a duty, scratching an itch that’s been tickling him for two years now. You want him to want you as you are now. You want him to choose you. 
“Yes.” You say, pressing your palm flat against his cheek. “Just...be gentle with me?” 
“Of course.” He says, kissing your palm again. “You change your mind at any time, you tell me, yeah?” 
You nod. “Yeah.” 
“Good.” He takes your hand in his again, standing from his seat. 
Nerves mix with excitement as he pulls you to your feet with him, stepping up close to you. His hand lifts, tilting your chin up. Your stomach flutters as you meet his gaze, his eyes warm and soft as he stares at you. Affection shines in them as his thumb brushes your lip before he’s leaning down, pressing his lips to yours.
The kiss is short and sweet, like the ones you’ve shared with him before. Yet, at the same time it feels different. There’s warmth beginning to blossom under your skin, the kiss not just a simple sign of affection this time. It’s the overture, the appetizer, just a teasing taste of what’s to come. 
You hold his hand as he leads you down the hallway, heels clacking on the tile floor. It makes your face warm, the thought that they all know what it means, they can hear it and they know what’s about to happen. They know where you’re going, what you’re about to do. 
John opens his door, motioning for you to enter. You haven’t been in any of their rooms yet, you haven’t invaded their own sacred spaces. Your steps are slow and cautious as you breach that barrier, John’s scent washing over you as you step into his room. 
It’s neat and tidy, just as you expected it would be. It’s not laid out all that differently from your own, though perhaps a bit more organized and clinical than yours. There’s a shelf next to his nightstand, stuffed with books and what you can assume are souvenirs from places he’s been. There’s stacks of papers on the desk, his clothes and shoes tucked away neatly in their places. His bed is slightly bigger than yours, and you wonder if that’s a perk of his status, or if he pulled some strings once he learned he was getting an omega. 
The door clicking shut draws your attention back to John, the click of the handle a finality. You’re doing this. There’s no going back now. 
Not that you want to. 
John steps up to you, staring down at you. You stare up into his eyes as his hand comes to rest on your waist, his touch hot through the thin fabric of your dress. “You’re sure you want to do this?” He asks, voice rumbling in his chest. 
You nod, your hands slowly sliding up his arms, feeling the muscle hidden beneath his dress shirt. “Yes.” 
His lips meet yours, beard tickling your skin as he kisses you. You let him lead, leaning into him as he pulls you closer against his chest. He’s so warm, so firm under your hands as you grip his shoulders. His hand slides from your hip to your back, a gasp parting your lips as his calloused fingers touch the bare skin of your back. Goosebumps raise on your skin, a shiver running down your spine at his touch. He tilts his head, taking advantage of your parted lips to slip his tongue into your mouth.
He tastes like wine, a quiet sound leaving your throat as he pulls you tighter against him, pressing your body into his. You can feel all of him, the hard ridges, the strength in his body as he cages you in his arms. Your head is spinning, intoxicated purely by the smell and taste of him. 
Something rumbles deep in his chest, your entire body shivering in response. Your fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt, your hips pressed flush against his. You can feel him, the bulge in his pants pressing against your stomach. You’ve been able to smell the musky tinge of arousal in his scent all evening, and you wonder how long he’s been hard. Has it been since he saw you? Or has he been thinking about this all day? 
The thought thrills you, makes your omega preen in the back of your mind. You did this. Your alpha is all worked up because of you. 
A whimper leaves your lips as his hand slips lower, smoothing over the curve of your ass. He mumbles a curse against your lips before they blaze a path down the line of your jaw to your neck. You tilt your head, bearing your throat for him. A low rumble of approval vibrates through his chest, his hand squeezing your ass. The sound has your omega practically belly up, the dampness between your thighs intensifying as your scent gets heavier in the air. 
John groans against your throat, teeth nipping at your neck just over your scent gland. “Such a good girl for me.” He groans, his hand on your ass guiding your hips to grind against his. “Such a good omega.” 
You whine at the praise, hands blindly sliding down his chest to pull at the buttons of his shirt. Your fingers are trembling slightly from excitement, fumbling as you attempt to get his shirt off. You need to feel him, his skin against yours, the warmth of him pressed against you. 
“Easy pup.” His voice rumbles against your throat, teeth nipping at the delicate skin before he pulls back, hands taking over to strip him of his button up and undershirt. 
You lick your lips as his skin is revealed to you, your hand automatically lifting to touch him. You hesitate for a half a second but he makes no move to stop you. Your eyes trail over his form, over the many, many scars that decorate his skin like some kind of macabre painting. Lines and jagged slices, the telltale star shaped marks of bullet wounds. Cuts and nicks from knives or bullets, you can’t tell the difference. 
Your fingers settle on a rather large scar on his side, starting at the base of his ribs and curling around his side. It’s an old scar, but the skin is still rough and uneven. Whatever had caused it, it took a chunk out of him. You don’t want to think about it, about how every scar could have been a close call. How many times he’s been on the brink of death. 
“I’ll tell you about them later.” He says, taking your hand in his and lifting it to his lips. He kisses your fingertips, his beard tickling your skin. “Tonight is about you.” 
He pulls you close again, leaning down to press his lips to yours. His hands are warm against your back as he wraps himself around you again, trapping your hands against his bare chest. Your nails dig into his skin as his hands sink lower, grabbing handfuls of your ass. He groans, sinking his teeth into your bottom lip. He presses you backwards, and you trust him to guide you until your legs hit the side of his bed. 
“Gonna be a good girl for me, yeah?” He growls, his voice rough around the edges as his alpha slips through. 
“Yes, alpha!” You gasp against his lips, your head tilting back in submission. 
“Always such a good omega for me.” He praises you, teeth nipping at your throat. “Good omegas kneel for their alphas.” He says, pushing you backwards so you plop down on his bed. “But a good alpha,” He slowly lowers himself before you, dropping to one knee, then the other as his hands wrap around your ankles. “Kneels for his omega.”
Your face warms as you stare down at him, unable to do anything but watch as his hands make quick work of your shoes, setting them neatly beside the bed. His skin is rough against yours as his hands drag up your legs, slowly parting them. He moves himself closer, kneeling between your parted thighs. His beard scratches the sensitive skin of your inner thigh as he reaches up, pushing on your stomach until you're laying flat on his bed. He can see up your skirt now, and you're silently glad for the lacy panties Johnny had insisted on. 
“Do you trust me?” His lips brush your inner thigh as his hands pause just at the hem of your skirt where it's ridden up almost to your hips. 
“Yes, alpha.” You say, lifting your head to stare down at him. 
He meets your gaze as he presses a kiss to your inner thigh, his hands continuing to press upwards until your dress is hiked around your waist. Your heart is fluttering rapidly in your chest as you stare down at him, his gaze leaving your eyes to stare at the soaked lace barely covering your most private parts. 
His hands leave your hips to curl around the lace, giving it a sharp tug. The fabric snaps easily, the shreds falling to the floor. Your lip part as you stare at him in shock.  
“I'll buy you a new pair.” He says, his hands gripping your thighs to pull them further apart. 
The cool air in the room hits your slicked folds, making you shudder. He's barely touched you and already you can feel how slick you are. His lips press against your inner thigh again, blazing a path upwards. His gaze meets yours again as his hands shift to grip your hips, adjusting your position on the bed before he leans in, dragging his tongue through your folds. 
You gasp at the foreign sensation, your thighs pressing against his broad shoulders. His mouth is warm as it closes over your pussy, his tongue licking another slow stripe up your folds until he reaches the spot that has your inhale turning into a gasp. 
He focuses his attention there, dragging slow lines across your clit with his tongue. You let your arms give out, laying flat on the bed again. Little whimpers leave your lips as he teases your clit, your thighs already trembling. It’s been so long since you’ve touched yourself. Not since before you left the institute four months ago. 
You don’t last very long. 
Your thighs squeeze around his shoulders as your orgasm is ripped from you suddenly. You let out a cry that’s probably too loud, but you don’t care who could have heard you as your back arches off the bed, pressing your hips closer to John’s face. His hands hold your thighs, keeping you still as his tongue continues to tease your clit, working you through your orgasm. 
It’s not until you’re writhing in his grasp, letting out little whimpers that he relents, lifting his face from between your thighs. His beard is shiny with your juices, his tongue darting out to lick his lips. It’s obscene and yet, it has heat pulsing straight between your legs again. He lets out a chuckle, the scent of your arousal washing over him. 
“Fuckin sweet as sugar, love.” He says as he pushes himself up from between your legs, his body folding over yours on the bed. 
His face presses into your neck, inhaling deeply. Your pussy flutters at the thought of him claiming you now, sinking his teeth into your skin to mark you as his forever. He could. It would be so easy for him to do it. His tongue laves over the skin covering your scent gland, a shiver running through you. Your arms wrap around him, holding him against you as your scents mingle, musky with arousal. 
“Alpha...” You whine, your hips pressing up against the bulge in his pants. He’s fully hard now, the fabric of his pants providing delicious friction against your folds. 
He shushes you, pressing a kiss to your throat before he pushes himself up over you. “Soon, love.” He says, moving until he’s standing in front of you. “Think you’re a bit overdressed still.” 
Your eyes dart down to his pants. “So are you.” 
He smirks, his hands dropping to your waist, slowly pushing your dress up higher. You let him slip it over your head, lifting your arms to help him. You’re bare before him, warmth spreading through your veins as he stares down at you. Your hands lift, coming to rest on his thighs. You can feel the muscle through the fabric, the strength of him beneath your hands. How easily he could take control, pin you down and take what he wants with little regard for you or your pleasure. How easily he could hurt you, snap your bones like they’re toothpicks, bruise and batter your body without even straining a muscle. 
Yet he stands here, patiently watching as your hands move closer and closer to the prominent bulge in his fitted pants. He doesn’t even twitch as your hand cups his hard length, your breath stuttering at the sheer size of him. He’s big like most alphas are, or so you’ve heard. 
His eyes stare into you as you undo his belt, popping the button on his pants open. He finally moves as you pull down the zipper, helping you tug his pants and briefs down. His cock stands at attention, almost as stiff as he is. You stare at his veiny cock with wide eyes, the tip flushed almost red with how hard he is. 
“Christ.” You breathe, staring at him in awe. 
You did that. 
“Easy, love.” He says, leaning down to wrap an arm around your waist. “I said tonight was about you.” 
He moves you so you’re laid out on the bed, your head hitting his pillow. The scent of him floods your nose as he joins you on the bed, the frame creaking as he kneels between your legs. Nerves twist in your stomach as you continue to stare at his cock bobbing between his thighs as he runs his hands along your legs. It’s going to hurt, you know that. It suddenly seems daunting, this request. At least during your heat you’d be so out of it with need you wouldn’t really feel anything. And you’d have plenty of slick to help. 
“None of that.” He says, squeezing your thighs gently. “I told you I’d take care of you.” 
You nod, swallowing thickly. 
“We’ve got more work to do before we reach that point. I’m not just going to stuff my cock into you like some needy pup.” He stares at you. “You tell me and I’ll stop, alright?” 
You nod again. “Yes, alpha.” 
Your breath hitches as his hands reach the junction of your thighs, one moving to your stomach, the other dragging through your folds, gathering your wetness on his fingers. They’re so much thicker than your own, your pussy clenching as he presses against the entrance. 
“Relax for me, love.” He says, rubbing gentle circles on your stomach with his thumb. 
His finger presses into you and your lips part at the intrusion. You clamp tight around his finger, making him groan. 
“Easy.” He says, his thumb moving to circle your clit. 
A breathy whine leaves your lips as his finger presses deeper into you, reaching further than you ever could. Your hand reaches up to thread through his hair, letting the short cropped strands slide through your fingers. It’s softer than you imagined, though you expect he too had spent the afternoon preparing for tonight as well. The mental image of him lathering himself in moisturizer would have made you laugh if his finger hadn’t brushed against a spot inside you that has your hips lifting off the bed. 
He leans down, lips blazing a path up your stomach, between your breasts to your throat. He swallows your moans as he works you open with his fingers, the lewd sound of his fingers thrusting into your wet pussy only adding to the pleasure coursing through you. You can feel it building within you, heat burning through your veins. Price groans against your lips as your nails scratch his scalp, his cock leaking against your thigh. You want him, need him inside of you. You need to feel him, you need to be close to him. 
“Alpha, please.” You whimper, tugging at his hair. 
He stares down at you, eyes blown with lust. “Please, what?” 
“Need you.” You whimper, grinding against his hand. “Please, sir.” 
Price closes his eyes, letting out a groan. His cock twitches against your thigh, his fingers slipping from you. He breathes out a curse, shifting to open his nightstand. He pulls out a bottle of lube, sitting back on his knees to squirt some into his hand. You’re plenty slick, but you watch as he rubs the lube on his cock, tossing the bottle back into the open drawer. 
He kneels between your thighs again, staring down at you as one of his hands comes to rest on your hip. You feel intoxicated, your head spinning from the intensity of his scent around you and the knowledge of what’s about to happen. 
Price folds his body over yours again, the head of his cock brushing your folds. You moan into his mouth as he kisses you, parting your thighs further for him as his tip catches on your opening. Your hands grip his shoulders as he presses into you, the stretch stinging a bit as he works you open. This is it. There’s no going back now. 
You don’t want to. 
You whimper quietly as he pushes into you, nails biting into his skin. It’s too much, yet you can’t get enough of it as he sinks further in. You let out a shaky breath as he pulls away from your lips staring down at your face. 
“Alright?” He asks, stilling where he is. 
You nod. “Just need a moment. You’re really big.” 
His lips twitch up into a smile, a pleased growl rumbling through his chest. “Don’t start talking like that, love.” He says, leaning down to press kisses to your face. 
“Or what?” You ask, your nails digging harder into his skin. 
“I might not be able to control myself.” He growls, his alpha slipping out around the edges of his voice. 
Your pussy clenches at his words, walls clamping down around him. He lets out another growl, hiking your leg up over his hip. It forces him deeper into you, your breath catching at the feeling of him spreading you open. 
“Fuck,” You breathe, rocking your hips to take him even deeper into you. 
John’s arms frame your head as he presses his body against yours. Your arms slip around his back, legs locking around his waist as he begins to move slowly, working himself deeper and deeper into you until he’s pressed flush against you. He stills for a moment, pressing his forehead to yours as you both breathe. You’re trembling just slightly, overwhelmed with being so close to him, to your alpha. The pain and discomfort is gone, replaced by burning heat as desire pulses through your veins. 
“Please, alpha.” You whimper. 
He shushes you, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips. “I’ve got you, omega.” 
Your skin is slick with sweat already as he begins to rock his hips into you. Your hands press into his back, feeling the muscles shift and flex as he moves. It feels good, the friction of your bodies, the way he stretches you open with every thrust. Your head is spinning with pleasure at the thought of being so close to another person, being so connected with someone else. 
Not just someone else, with your alpha. 
The wet squelch of your pussy as he thrusts into you is loud, the mattress creaking as he picks up speed. You’re trembling, your thighs squeezing around his hips as he pushes you closer and closer to the edge. You’re not sure how he’s lasted this long, especially without any sort of release for himself yet tonight. 
Perhaps it was the training he spoke about earlier.
You’re not sure how he manages it. You couldn’t have that kind of control. Not after this. Not after knowing how good it can feel, how good he can make you feel. 
“Fucking feel so good.” He grunts, his breath fanning her ear. His own skin is slicked with sweat, muscles twitching under her hands. “So fucking tight and warm.” 
“John!” You gasp, digging your fingers into his shoulder blades as he picks up the pace even more, his hips snapping against yours. 
“Gonna cum for me? Gonna cum like a good omega? Need you to cum for me.” He grunts, staring down at you. 
You let out a whine, arching against him as you seek your second high of the night. His cock brushes that spot inside of you, stars nearly erupting behind your eyes. 
“Right there.” You gasp, thighs shaking around his hips. “Fuck, right there!” 
You’re being loud but you don’t care, nails dragging down his back as he focuses his thrusts right at that spot inside you. You cum with a cry, pussy squeezing around him. He lets out a loud groan, his hips stilling as he twitches inside you. His muscles go lax, his body falling on top of yours. He manages to keep himself from squishing you beneath him, his face pressing against your neck. 
The smell of sex, arousal, sweat, and your own combined scents are heavy in the air. You’re shaking, still wrapped tightly around John as he lays on top of you. He’s breathing heavily, warm breaths fanning against your neck. You don’t want to move, your mind buzzing with the aftershocks of your orgasm still. 
“Alright?” He murmurs, lips pressing a gentle kiss against your throat. 
You nod, slowly unwinding yourself from around him. “Yeah. ‘M good.” 
“Fucking Christ, a man could get addicted to that.” He says, lifting his face from your neck. “Sweet little omega.” 
Your face warms more than it already feels, and you lean into his touch as his fingers brush your cheek. 
“Let me go get something to clean this mess up with.” He says, pushing himself up so he’s kneeling. 
You can’t help but giggle as his joints pop and he lets out a groan at the effort. “Need a break, old man.” 
His eyes flash playfully, a hint of a smile tugging at his lips. “Going with the old man insults again, huh?” 
You give him a look. “You’re the one grunting while getting up.” 
You let out a surprised yelp as he brings his hand down on your thigh, the skin tingling as he gets up. “I’ll show you old man.” He murmurs as he heads for his en suite. 
You bite your lip as you begin to feel his release slipping out of you, the feeling causing desire to stir in your stomach once more. 
John tsks as he comes back, wiping the mess between your thighs. “Needy little thing.” He practically purrs, stepping away to toss the rag into the bathroom sink before he returns, climbing back onto the bed.
You press as close to him as you can, nuzzling into his neck. Your limbs are still twitching a bit, your mind buzzing from the aftermath of what had just transpired. John wraps his arms around you, holding you close to his chest. You press a gentle kiss to his neck, earning a rumble in response. Your own rumble starts up as you purr contently, tossing a leg over his hip to allow you to get as close to him as possible. 
He huffs out a laugh, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “Comfortable?” 
You purr louder in response, sleep beginning to fog the corners of your mind. 
“Good girl.” He says, pressing another kiss to your head. “Sleep. Alpha’s got you.”
NEXT ->
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screampied · 8 months ago
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Full Nelson with big bf Sukuna?🥺 One where gf is all giddy and coy about asking him & he’s so big he can pull your hair far back enough to give you a kiss from arching you it’s rough but she’s like ‘I love you I love you ‘Kuna you’re the best boyfriend I love you<3’
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❤︎ ໋𓈒 doing the full nelson position with big bf sukuna
warnings. fem! reader, full nelson, praise, dirty talk, unprotected, size diff / manhandling, mdni.
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big bf! sukuna who adores comparing how small you are to him - a simple gaze looking down at you and it only fuels his ego even more.
you were so cute, so it’s much to his surprise when you suggest to him a new position you wanted to try.
“heh. silly little girl,” he scoffs, you’re propped up all comfortable on his lap whilst trying to describe the position with hand visuals for him. sukuna leans back, bulky crossed arms and a near pout on his lips as he listened to you. “full…nelson? that means i’ll have to hold you up. can you even handle that? be honest.”
“i can or i wouldn’t be asking,” you pout, leaning in to kiss underneath his chin. sukuna remains still—yet its like he was staring right into your soul. he brings a hand towards your hip before a small smile spreads against his lips at your cheeky confidence. “pretty please?”
“…fine,” sukuna grumbles, and you let off an abrupt gasp once he makes you face the other way—you feel his arms wrap around you. he leans further back before he grabs onto your thighs, an attempt to align himself. “hold on to me. ‘m gonna have fun stretchin’ you like this, princess.”
“don’t drop me, ‘kuna,” you moaned, feeling him grip tightly underneath your thighs. a thumb of his strokes against your skin before his leaky tip prods against your aroused entrance.
you were already so soaked . . . probably due to the fact he was eating you out hours on end just a few minutes ago.
sukuna grouses. “woman relax, i got you,” and you’d only then realize how lewd this particular position was. as your back was pressed against his chest, the curse nearly has your legs in a tight lock. he was so strong. handling you like this, making you bend just a bit. once he starts to bury himself into you, you bite down on your lip. “mhm. jus’ like that, lay back on me ‘n let me do all the work.”
he’s barely in and you already feel full, his tip was nice and fat — plump, a few droplets of his pre-cum coated near your entrance as he’s sinking into your pussy.
his girth made an appearance, easily stretching you out further.
“f-fuckkk,” you’d whine, both hands idly stiff beside you. it felt so good. too good. sukuna was trying to go slow, he knew he’d probably break you if he didn’t. the size difference, it never failed to make him amused.
sukuna kisses his teeth, feeling you grip all around him. his head briefly goes back, and he squeezes your thigh. “gonna feel me reach everywhere, princess. you want that?”
“y-yes,” you’d mewl out, inch after inch you started to feel more stuffed with his cock. he was purely thick. such length to him, it almost had you drooling. tongue salivating, lips parting and all. you were panting, starting to rub against his arm as your head went back. “more ‘kuna. don’t s-stop. wanna feel you.”
“aw. ya wanna feel me?” he repeats, mocking your sweet tone. it was quite embarrassing, yet you were too full of dick to comprehend his words. it hasn’t even been that long and you just knew you weren’t gonna last. sukuna was gonna snatch yet another orgasm out of you within a blink of an eye.
and you couldn’t wait.
sukuna lifts you up with burly arms, low grunts flying past his lips. once he’s fully in—deeply buried into your cunt, he makes you start to bounce on him. a cute abashed gasp comes from you, and he’s slow and steady at first. he kept his word, securely keeping your body in place.
“so cute like this,” he murmurs in a husky tone. you moan, feeling sukuna playfully tug back on your hair. even with stuffing inches into you, he still found the time of day to tease you. you always let him. you never necessarily minded.
“always—always know how to take me. good fuckin’ messy girl,” and he was so close up to your ear. muttering the filthiest things to make you even more sopping wet for him. “dunno why ya didn’t suggest this position to me earlier.”
“thought you were gonna tease me,” you gasp once he drags a hand down between your legs. you were soaking. it was quite a sight, he starts to maneuver circles against your clit with one hand before giving it a brief spank. “s-sukunaaa.”
“maybe,” he groans, and he’s just got you stupid.
he’s got you stupidly jerking back and forth against him with your mouth all open. straight dumbfounded. the perfect word to describe you.
you briefly crane your neck to glance back at him and he’s giving you a sly grin. “my oh my, such a sloppy girl i got myself here. can barely hold herself up so i gotta do it for her, hm . . ?”
your head went back and back against him whilst you’re being stretched to the very limit. it was an entire mess. the way your pussy sang lewdly in harmony. squelches, pretty pitched squelches that always drive sukuna crazy. each squelch rang throughout your ears.
you continued to repeat his name, barely able to murmur out a coherent word. oh, it was adorable. by this point, you were just straight up babbling.
sukuna’s cock hit you deep, extremely.
pumping you full of his entire length . . every inch again and again and again. those eyes of yours, practically cross crossed and dilated.
as he held your thighs up, your mouth was just simply agape, maw dropped at how good he’s drilling into your cunt.
“o-oh my goddd,” you’d whimper, and he gets closer and closer to thrashing against your sweet g-spot. “kunaaa, i- i love you,” you hiccup. and he chuckles, it was so random. your breathing became more and more erratic before you mewl out cute cacophonies of, “i- i love you, love you ‘s much. make me feel so good, ‘k-kuna.”
“praise me more, girl.” he hums, a raspy chuckle leaving the back of his throat. he was obviously joking but he did enjoy the sound of your voice.
especially at moments like this, moments where it’d be a tad pitch higher, bringing you closer and closer towards your incoming release. sukuna grabs you by the neck with a free hand, gently turning you to pull you into a kiss.
you moan, craning your head yet again to make a cute attempt at kissing back. “needy baby,” he utters, making you depart before kissing you again, then one more time, and another. “i love you too, brat.”
his hefty base hits against you profusely, time and time again. you’re dizzy, head spinning, heart racing. a plethora of emotions. yet, your breathing starts to pick up over time. he’s ramming his thick cock into you before you start moaning. “getting close ‘kuna, f-fuck ‘s gooddd.”
grunting, he huffs out a, “me too,” and his voice was dangerously low. you were drenched, heaving against his chest. he’s lifting you up and down his cock — by now, you’re facing the other way and sukuna playfully wraps an arm around your neck. you’re in a safe head lock, and he chuckles lowly against your ear. “fuckin’ make a mess on me. give it to me ‘n don’t make me beg, princess.”
you whine, feeling him reach down to spank your pussy again.
the loud squelches, so moist…
the entire noise reverberated across the entire room, sounds of your pussy hitting back against him in sync. he loved more than anything to play between your legs.
pressure continues to build up and up and up, arising perfectly. from sukuna holding up your legs, you clench and unclench around him. you don’t even realize how much you’re starting to drool — it was a sight. he scoffs, bringing a hand to cup your chin. “messy girl. droolin’ all for some cursed cock. ya like this position don’t you?”
you nod, an eager cute nod and he chuckles. sukuna feels himself approaching close too. really close. he groans, feeling you take him in with such ease. your cunt had him whipped, so warm and the perfect fit. his thrusts started to become sloppy and he bites near the inner part of your neck. you whine, feeling the softness of his canines collide against your sweet skin.
a bundle of nerves ran its course all over your body, you felt shivers run past you before you whine. “g-gonna cum. ‘kuna ‘m gonna—.”
sukuna ends up cumming at the same time as you, it was a lot. perhaps a lot was an understatement though.
whenever he came, it was so much. you weren’t even sure if it would stay inside of you. majority of the time, it didn’t. thick velvety ropes of his cum would run down your thighs and he’s pout whenever he sees it coming to waste.
he’s huffing and puffing, filling up your pussy and he slows his rhythm down—you catch your breath, feeling absolutely stretched to the max before he intakes a sharp breath, exhaling afterwards. you just sat there for a while, leaned back against the curse with a dumb smile on your face.
“…you love me?” you utter, feeling him loosen his grip on your body.
“shut up.”
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madaqueue · 1 month ago
Text
LIKE WE WERE MADE TO
of course your doting boyfriend satoru cares about you - he walks you to work every morning, packs your lunches, makes you tea every night before bed. he'd do anything for you, so of course he'll help you with your heat.
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pairing: alpha!gojo x omega!f!reader
themes/content: dark content (omegaverse). smut. heats, fingering, knotting, light dumbification, satoru being a little lovesick. (wk: 1.3k)
a/n: YAYYY happy quintober everyone >:) here's my contribution for the @ficsforgaza kinktober event, so excited to be a part of this and check out the link below for more works under this project! view my full kinktober masterlist and the google form for signup to be tagged in other works too! hope you all enjoy :3
quintober masterlist | sign up form | ffg kinktober
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Satoru had no idea what to expect as he ran home through the crowded streets; since reading your brief text of ‘Come home. Need you.’ the alarm bells sounding in his head had failed to quiet. He prepared for the worst, scenarios racing through his mind. Were you hurt?
As he barrels through your front door, he certainly doesn’t expect what lays behind it: you, sprawled out naked on the couch, flushed cheeks and sweating, two fingers buried deep inside your cunt.
“What’s going on-”
The sentence dies in his throat as his entire body tenses. Something new hangs in the air, something sending his every sense into overdrive. Almost sickeningly sweet, with an unmistakable, carnal need.
Your heat.
“‘Toru,” you breathe out - even his name on your tongue sounds different, an unfamiliar desperation dripping from it, “need you, now.”
In an instant he’s by your side, your scent growing exponentially stronger with each step he takes until it begins to cloud his own thoughts, overcome with his body’s innate desire to care for you, to care for his omega.
He’s never seen you like this - in your time dating, your suppressants had done their job; maybe that’s why you barely noticed when they ran out last week. Just a few hours ago he was walking hand-in-hand with you to work, your eyes glimmering as you told him about your plans for the day. Something about a big meeting with supervisors? He was honestly a bit distracted by the way your thumb drew circles along his skin, the new perfume he thought you were wearing, how pretty you looked all bundled up in your coat and scarf, like a little present waiting to be unwrapped - before you lightly smacked the back of his head.
“Are you even listening to me, ‘Toru?”
“No,” he beamed.
You rolled your eyes, but couldn’t stifle the smile spreading across your lips. Pressing a peck to his cheek, you turned on your heel with a small wave, your fingers dancing against the backdrop of the fall sky.
You always knew how to handle him - that was something he admired about you. He knew his personality easily veered into chaos, and yet you never seemed bothered by it, holding him in your palms and keeping him a stable shape. It took strength to do that, to not let his soul blend the edges of your own.
And yet, now, his strong, independent girlfriend has become nothing more than a sweet, desperate mess. The thought makes his teeth ache.
“Please,” the broken mewl pulls him back to the sweetness surrounding you as you continue pumping your fingers in and out.
Before he can choke out a response, your hands begin hastily removing his clothes, tugging off anything you can grab, palms sweaty against his torso as you unzip his uniform. With a harsh tear, his shirt falls to shreds on the floor, muscles rippling beneath. He was never known for his patience, after all - could you blame him?
“I got you, baby,” he murmurs, climbing on top of you so his thighs straddle your body, sinking into the cushions. “I’m here, m’gonna take good care of you.”
Two lanky fingers collect the slick pooling at your entrance as his free hand wraps around your wrist, gently pulling your palm from between your legs. He holds it above your head, leaning forward and blanketing you in his warmth. A wave of pleasure crashes over you as he slides inside, curling his fingertips towards that spot only he seems able to reach.
But it’s not enough.
“More, ‘Toru, please, need more,” you whine, your hips bucking up involuntarily. The words continue spilling into the air, desperate pleas for what you really need, what only he can give you.
“Okay, just - fuck - gimme a second.” And he’s panting already, the biological drive within him threatening to take over, to pin you down and fuck you until you’re nothing more than a limp little mess beneath him. But he’s better than that.
Right?
It takes every ounce of control to align his tip with your core and stay there for a moment, allowing you to adjust to the stretch as he knows you would want him to, but it’s made all the more difficult with your hands weakly grasping at his hips in an attempt to pull him forward.
“Please, pleasepleaseplease,” you babble, “pleaaaseee-aaaahhh.”
When his cock finally enters you, all your nerves alight in flames. Your vision goes white, eyes rolling back as he fills you up. Exactly what you needed. For a moment, everything stills, returning to your senses as his own musky scent begins mingling in the air with yours.
The brief clarity lets you pick up on the prettiest little whines falling from his lips at the way you envelop him so perfectly, two souls made for one another.
In only a few thrusts he’s sweating, his body sticking to yours with each push and pull of his pelvis. It’s hot, impossibly hot, both of your cheeks flushed and gasping for air. When his lips meet yours, it’s imprecise and messy, breathing into each other’s mouths as your tongues meld. He tastes like sugar and desire and love and cinnamon, like some dessert you were denied as a child for fear it would give you a tummy ache. But now, it’s the only thing satiating you, the only thing you can stomach.
“M’gonna make you feel better,” he’s mumbling into you, “gonna fuck you so good.”
“Only you, ‘Toru,” you babble, and you’re just as gone as he is, “has to be you.”
There’s truth to it, of course - only he could quell the growing ache inside you. Only your alpha. Your bodies were made for this, you realize: with each increasingly rough thrust, he hits every spot inside you so perfectly, and as your walls begin to flutter around him, you squeeze him in just the way that has him losing the last remaining shreds of his sanity.
Each beat of his heart echoes through his ears, overshadowing the wet squelches of your cunt around him and the lewd slapping of his balls against your ass. All he knows is you - his sweetheart, his other half, his omega.
As he ruts into you, something hot and thick begins coiling in his stomach, something unfamiliar, but the words are engraved into his soul as he slurs, “gonna take my knot f’me, yeah? ‘S’gonna help, okay?”
Teary eyes blink up at him, glossed over in pleasure as you nod. “Need it, please,” you whimper. Your mouth forms the word on pure instinct, “Alpha.”
And that’s all it takes to make him snap.
With a broken cry of your name, he releases into you.
The sensation of his cock twitching sends you over the edge, the heat in your chest burning brighter and brighter and brighter until it’s all you can feel.
As you come down from your high, there’s a new pressure in your core - you feel so, so fucking full.
His cum swells inside you as he cautiously adjusts his body weight. Pink cheeks and blue eyes find your gaze and he gives you a weak chuckle, met with your own equally fucked-out grin as you brush sweat-slicked hair from his forehead.
It takes effort to slow his breathing enough to speak, enough to think. “Your first heat with me,” he muses to himself. His heart warms at the thought: now he can take care of you in the way he was made to. “Love you s’much, baby,” he hums, pressing a sloppy kiss to your lips before nuzzling into your neck, softly breathing in the warm scent.
“Love you, too.” Your fingertips slowly scratch his undercut, the haze now clearing enough that you swear you hear him purr. Your cunt involuntarily clenches around him - around his knot - as you gently run your nails down his back. His body melds perfectly around yours. “Alpha.”
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