#let our boys fall in love with each other and be endgame

[bellsmess]

Whenever someone calls Charles Rowland straight, an angel dies.

What straight guy tells his best friend who just confessed to him that there's no one else – no one – he would go to Hell for. And that they have forever to figure out what that means. You don’t get his repressed bisexuality like I do!

Even modern bisexuals (I may or may not be speaking from personal experience) are oblivious to the fact they're bi because heteronormative roles are so engraved in our minds. When you're attracted to other genders, it's easy to miss a same-sex crush, only then to realise that oh, it wasn’t just admiration, it was attraction.

Charles, having grown up at the height of the AIDS crisis, with an abusive and probably homophobic father, killed by racist bullies? That would make anyone repress any gay feelings. Especially if you experience crushes on people with a different sex to you.

Charles sees Crystal and takes his chance. He's enamoured with this smart, strong-willed, pretty girl who can see him not only in a physical sense, but pays attention to him. He longs to be loved. Then he says the infamous "That sounds alot like you, doesn't it? Maybe that's why I like her so much" line. What an icon. And he compares himself and his best friend to the greatest love story of all time, Orpheus and Euridyce's.

When Edwin confesses to him, he doesn't rule out the possibility of returning these feelings. He knows they're already devoted to each other. They've already had 30 years of companionship and solving cases together.

"As long as I have my best mate and a case to solve, I'm good."

Being with Edwin is simple. They solve cases, help others, run away from Death. It's a simple existance. Charles gave up eternity to be with Edwin, because he was kind to him when he was dying. Charles finds him fun, wants to protect him, knows that Edwin is a kind and good person. One that Charles wants to be.

"Bad guys don't worry about being bad guys. And you, Charles Rowland, are the best person I know."

Crystal's role is very important in changing the dynamic between Edwin and Charles. Not only because Charles falls for her, but because she opens them up. She digs out their repressed feelings and trauma. Charles finally deals with his dad's abuse, his happy-go-lucky mask falls. She points it out to Edwin. Charles kept it up so well because Edwin didn't press it, but Crystal does. And Charles finally lets himself process what happened to him, and how that affects his relationships.

Charles never saw genuine love between his parents, and that affects how he views relationships. It impacts how he forms them, too. But he's a loverboy, he longs to be loved, he falls easily. Why wouldn’t he fall for someone who stuck to his side for 30 years?

Crystal and Monty's roles mirror each other – they help the boys figure out their feelings and desires. Crystal makes Edwin jealous that there's someone else Charles cares about in the same sense he cares for Edwin. The Cat King helps Edwin discover desire, Monty – genuine love. As Charles' and Crystal's relationship kickstarts (albeit ends as quickly) and Monty persues Edwin, he discovers the depth of his feelings.

"These complicated feelings that you have? They're for Charles."

I would love to see their wants explored more in the future season(s, hopefully multiple). Charles giving into desire with Desire of the Endless' guidance? Yes please.

I simply cannot believe that anyone would doubt Painland/Payneland endgame. They're everything to each other. They're a constant presence, reassurance, and love. Platonic, romantic, it doesn't matter. Their bond is so deep and genuine that immortal beings see it and leave them be, in the afterlife they chose for each other. Their love is so deep it transcends planes: from mortal plane to Hell, it leads Charles to Edwin. Charles is not Orpheus, when he turns around to hear Edwin out on the staircase from Hell, he manages to get him out. And they have literally forever for each other.

[hnbka]

BYLER and SUBSTITUTING

like this:

Because, I mean, without you, we'd all fall apart. Even me. Especially me. These past few months, I've been so lost without you. It's just, I'm so different from other people, and……when you're…when you're different, sometimes……I feel like a mistake. But you make me feel like I'm not a mistake at all.

which is the most OBVIOUS substitution in byler history because it is clear the audience is meant to pick up on it. it's not subtle. but-- mike does this too.

“It's not my fault I don't like girls. I'm not trying to be a jerk. Okay? But we're not kids anymore. I mean, what did I think, really? That we were never gonna get girlfriends? We were just gonna sit in my basement all day and play games for the rest of our lives?”

the difference is mike is projecting onto will rather than a side speaker. and you might think this isn't supposed to be used as a substitution for himself. but will is not the odd one out here. dustin wanted to play games and he had a girlfriend. like, logically, its two v two because they knew dustin would also want to play dnd. (and i'm not assuming, they say it in the fight.)

another important line here: we're not kids anymore.

okay, michael wheeler, let's look at byler speeches from when you guys were kids.

Do you remember the first day that we met? It was... It was the first day of kindergarten. I knew nobody. I had no friends and... I just felt so alone and so scared, but... I saw you on the swings and you were alone, too. You were just swinging by yourself. And I just walked up to you and... I asked. I asked if you wanted to be my friend. And you said yes. You said yes. It was the best thing I've ever done.

nothing's in red. nothing's crossed out or changed. because mike said exactly what he meant here (hoorah!). back when they were kids when they could actually tell each other their emotions and feelings because it didn't have to masquerade a romantic love. that love was normal to them until it was ostracized through internalized and externalized homophobia.

and what is stranger things at its heart??

a sci-fi show with villains and superpowers and lore YES BUT BEYOND THAT AND INTO THE CHARACTER ARCS

it's a show about kids growing up (and also jopper).

so? so, the change in their substitution says a lot. it says how hard they are hiding their feelings from each other, how it increases as they get older. which leads us back to their true feelings, aka season 2 ish, where they were pretty openly in love, in my opinion. holding hands, comforting each other, making freaking love confessions as seen above.

and juxtapose that with season 4, with all its red and changes in meaning?? we as viewers should understand that nothing the boys say is what they mean. they are hiding!!!

aka byler endgame

[damagedintellect]

Fyodor x reader x Nikolai [Rich kids AU]

💌 Days of our Bungo : Part 3 💌  

Summary: All of your fathers made a pack that whenever they had kids they would marry each other. It sounded like a good idea at the time but when the Sigma family was the only family to have a girl, and everyone wanted a bloodborne heir, things seemed a little complicated. After many arguments it was decided they would wait to see which boy, she, would fall for. Everyone always ends up having a crush on their childhood friend right?

Notes: Guess who had another Bungo dream, it was me! This time around the dream sequence started in the middle and just kept going so ima just fill in the gaps and start from the top.

Tropes: Sigma is your twin, Fyodor x reader x Nikolai, Fyodor is endgame, royalty/rich kids, Childhood friends, Mutual pinning but reader thinks it's one-sided, Nikolai knows its unrequited but he still loves you & Fyodor, eventual 🍋

💌 Word count: 5,327 💌 Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 Completed

“So let me get this straight, our parents were trying to arrange your marriage for years and they just happened to pick Fyodor?”

Nikolai asked bluntly, wearing an expression you couldn’t decipher. You had asked him to meet you by the fountain to see if he knew anything about the situation. He didn’t. He was actually shocked at the notion. Given how many times he's expressed his envy towards birds for their freedom you can imagine he probably has some mixed opinions on the endeavor. At least they weren't forcing Nikolai to marry anyone. Sigma was relieved about that. He was still frazzled and reassured you everything was fine after his talk with your father but you assume he's not telling you everything because you have your own problems to deal with.

You sighed. “From what I’ve gathered, that’s the gist. Apparently my father knew I had a crush on him.” You wondered if Kolya knew. Even if he didn’t, after Valentine's Day, he definitely did now.

Nikolai hummed rubbing his chin “Then what’s the problem? Isn’t this just hitting the jackpot?”

You stood up abruptly “How can you say that? What about Fedya?”

Nikolai smirked “What about Fedya? This is about you. Do you, or do you not want to marry Fyodor?” Nikolai stood up towering over you. A chill ran down your spine, you always forget how much taller Koyla is when you're not on pointe. You feel so tiny in comparison. It was a hard question, one that the latter didn’t even think twice about.

“I don’t want to marry him like this. You know that.” You couldn’t look into Nikolai's eyes anymore. You felt ashamed. It wasn’t like you were forcing him to marry you, that was your parents doing, but you still felt like you were taking advantage of the situation. He put his hands on your shoulders. “If you can’t marry Fyodor then how about you marry me instead!” Nikolai’s soft smile made you blink.

“What?” You were awestruck at the offer. Your head was empty, all you heard was the water pitter pattering behind you.

“You said you couldn’t break the engagement and Fyodor won’t help you do so either. I was a potential candidate for your hand, so marry me! I find it really quite simple.” He placed a hand on your cheek while the other grabbed your hand to pull you closer. “Eventually you’ll have to talk to Fedya whether you like it or not. You don’t want to marry him because you don’t know how he feels about you and it would feel wrong to force him into something he doesn’t want, even though you and I both know he would do whatever it takes to appease you or his father.” He tilted your head up. Forcing your eyes to meet. As he took a breath his features softened giving you a dreamy look. “I’m telling you point blank that I love you and I would give up my freedom to marry you in a heartbeat because that's how much I love you.” His voice dropped lower, a tone that held none of his usual playfulness. None of his typical Nikolai craving attention antics, it was said so that only you could hear him. Like he was telling you a secret. Nikolai has always been charming but it's never once flustered you before. The sincerity of his voice alone made you second guess yourself.

“Kolya” You whispered as he slowly started leaning in to close the distance. 

Just before your lips touched he snaked his hand around the back of your head and shoved your face into his chest. “I know, but please just let that sink in. Nothing has to be weird, I just-” He took in a deep breath “I will always be here for you but you should really consider talking to Fyodor.” He kissed the top of your head letting his lips linger for a moment before letting you go and abruptly turning around. It was fast enough that his braid ended up whacking you softly in the face as he walked away.

“Even Fedya can misinterpret things on occasion. It's better to be upfront with him.”

It would have been so easy to love Kolya but your heart didn’t ache the same way. You wanted to be alone for a little while but you didn’t want to worry your family. You took a walk in the garden watching the sunset. As darkness cascaded over the flowers you sigh as the brisk night air chilled your skin. It was probably time for dinner but you didn’t want to head inside just yet. A little further out was the gazebo where you first played as kids. Taking off your shoes you rubbed your socks on the hardwood to check how slippery it was. The groundskeeper was really good at maintaining the area. The floor felt perfect to dance on.

Just like that by the light of the moon illuminating your stage you danced. The world stopped existing for you. None of it mattered as long as you had the strength to hold each arabesque or the stamina to float on each grand jete. Anything to feel the ache in your muscles that made you feel alive, that made you live in this moment. It wasn’t until you opened your eyes to spot your pirouettes that you realized someone was watching you and it wasn’t Nikolai. You were panting after deciding a triple was enough. You can't run away from this.

“You're truly breathtaking. I was so enamored I did not want to interrupt.” 

Fyodor entered the gazebo. He walked over handing you a flower presumably from your garden. You twirled it between your fingers. Of course it was your favorite. “Why are you here?”

“Your father called in hopes that we were together. No one saw you come home. I had a feeling I knew where you would be so I told him not to worry.” In truth he already knew where you were because this is where you always go when you have a lot on your mind but even if he didn't, the locket he gave you had a tracking device just in case anything happened like that time before. Fyodor had it made after the kidnapping incident but never actually gave it to you because of Nikolai. After the study abroad it just seemed like the right time since he had it crafted to match the rings he wanted for your engagement.

“May I?” He took the flower back gesturing to your hair. 

You nodded. As expected if anyone would be able to find you it would be Fyodor. He curled your hair and put the flower behind your left ear. “You really are exquisite.”

You couldn’t stop the fluttering of your heart. Naturally he’d try to keep up the appearances even when he didn’t need to. Only Fyodor could be so meticulous. 

“It’s just us Fedya you don’t have to, you know.” Glancing down at your feet you didn’t have the words to express what you meant but you know he understood. He was annoyingly good at that.

Fyodor laughed lightheartedly, “Am I not allowed to indulge my fiance with compliments?”

“I-” You sucked in a shaky breath. “Did you know?” You peered back at him. Fyodor had to know what you were referring to. 

“I did.”

“You knew,” You could feel your eyes starting to tear up. “How long?”

Fedya delicately caressed your cheek. His eyes glistened in the moonlight. He was hopeful that you were going to be relieved by his words, given your reactions earlier. He still didn't know why you were so weary about it. “Since the day we first met.”

It was as you feared. He has known from the start. You didn’t know what to say. Maybe you were too scared to say anything. Fyodor didn’t seem to mind. He probably could guess what had been stewing in your head. You let Fyodor wrap you in his arms as he kissed the top of your head. He was warm and you felt safe but he was only following orders. He didn’t choose to marry you but if he’s known since the beginning then this was okay right? You felt the weight of guilt drop to your stomach again. 

“The moon is beautiful, isn’t it?”

You tilted your head to the side. Did you hear him correctly? You pulled away to try and see the moon. It was too cloudy to see from your angle but maybe Fedya could see it. “It’s too cloudy for me. I’m short, remember?”

“No I meant-” He stopped mid sentence “Nevermind, lets go inside before you catch a cold.”

___

After that you pretended that things had gone back to normal. It was easier that way. The voices were still resting in the back of your mind but they were easy enough to ignore. It was such a weird predicament you were caught up in. Nikolai loves you but you knew he didn’t want to take over the family business but he was willing to give up that freedom because he loved you. Fyodor has known since the beginning and if he had a problem with it at anypoint, could have done something to rectify his situation. Although in your heart of hearts you know he would never disobey his father. You can and will be able to do as you please so all you had to do really was make him fall in love with you. At least then it would make you less guilty.

It shouldn’t be that hard right? You had months to do so. Piece of cake considering you made Nikolai fall in love with you. The only other person he’s ever shown any interest in was Fyodor. You started off simply by playing the doting fiance by making homemade lunches to give to him. However you forgot that he could read you like a book. Every attempt you made to show him you were perfect wife material he could tell you were forcing yourself to do for his sake. It was almost driving you crazy. You knew it was pointless from the beginning but you had to try. Expressing your love was hard.

So the acts of service fiance didn’t work. You already spent a lot of quality time together and physical affection was so so but there were still other options to make him fall in love with you. If he didn’t want you romantically or even domestically, maybe you could try sexually? It was a long shot but hey you never know until you try. He was a teenage boy. They go crazy for a little bit of skin right? 

Technically you had a school uniform but you rolled up your skirt a few inches and unbuttoned the top few buttons on your shirt. Purple had always been his favorite color so you made sure to wear a vibrant neon purple bra that showed through your white shirt. A push up bra no less. Unfortunately Fedya took one look at you and forced you to wear his uniform blazer and covered your chest area with his scarf. He even went as far to wrap his extra cardigan around your waist so your skirt wouldn’t ride up in the back. Again you knew it was a long shot but damn did it hurt your pride. He only muttered “Are you trying to get dress coded?”

You were running out of ways to make him fall in love with you. Romantically and sexually were off the table so maybe intellectually? This really was your last ditch effort. You weren’t bad at academics, you just weren’t a gifted genius like Fyodor. To impress Fyodor you decided that if you beat him, Dazai or Ranpo at chess that should be enough. However you realized after your first match with Ranpo that it might actually be impossible. You were trying not to let it show on your face that you were downtrodden while you were playing against Dazai. Unfortunately it was so obvious that he let you win. You sighed as Dazai shook your hand making a big spectacle of losing. Fyodor had to swat Dazai away because he was being disrespectful to his fiance. Again another failed attempt. You were running out of time and fast. Before you knew it you were graduating.

In the blink of an eye you were out of time. You didn’t even bother trying to mask your melancholy as you got ready for the day. You had to wake up early and you didn’t even remember half of the things on the itinerary but you remember it was a lot. The maids were so excited as they were running around preparing for your departure. There was so much to do and you had such little knowledge of how Russian weddings proceeded. The paying the ransom, the betrothal, the crowning, a civil ceremony, a tour of the city, and finally the only thing you were familiar with was the reception. It all made your head spin but you followed along to the best of your abilities.

You wished you could have heard what Fyodor paid in the ransom. He refused to tell you as you were both ushered to the next location for the ceremony. You were anxious you didn’t want to do anything wrong. In fact you were so anxious you were running on autopilot until you had to break the crystal glasses. Fyodor held your hand to help you balance as you tried your best to stomp on the glasses with him. He was smiling at you so softly like you were his world but he aggressively tried to smash the cups into as many pieces as possible. You asked him about it in the car as you toured around the city.

“The ideology is that the number of shards signify the number of years our marriage will last.”

You didn’t even know what to say to that. It was such an endearing sentiment. Any words you had were caught in your throat. Fyodor didn’t mind the silence, your awestruck expression was enough for him. You were exhausted by the time you made it to the reception. 

The first toast was made to you and Fyodor. After finishing your drink his family started a chant that had everyone shouting at you. He chuckled at you before whispering “It means we kiss now.” Crashing his lips on yours he takes your face in his hands. That familiar warmth from your first kiss comes back full force. You’re dizzy as Fyodor's tongue explores your mouth. Everyone is cheering him on while you're melting in his touch. You can’t believe he’s doing this in front of your family. You're a mess by the time he pulls away. You have no idea what the hell just happened and by the time you came back to your senses Fyodor pulled you to the dance floor.

“My apologies darling, was I too rough?” He twirled you around and held you close. 

“I-I just wasn’t expecting it.”

“It would have taken too long to explain but the kiss is supposed to counter the bitterness of the wine. It needed to be sweet with passion.” He smiled fondly at you. His face practically had a smile plastered on it all day. You wonder if your classmates found it unnerving given his typical apathy towards them. He's always sort of regarded you with such fondness and you could fall in love with the brightness in his eyes.

You blushed but continued dancing, only humming in response. This whole day was giving you whiplash. Again maybe Fyodor should have been the actor of your group. You were the one who was supposed to make him fall in love with you and right now it felt like the other way around. Once your dance was done he ushered you right in front of your favorite dance partner and offered you to Nikolai. Which you raised an eyebrow at. 

“You look best when you're dancing. Who am I to stop you from enjoying the night with your friends? It is your wedding too.”

Nikolai pulled you both in for a hug quickly placing a kiss on Fyodor's cheek, snickering “Well I don’t need to be told twice.” He pulled away, bowing to you as he offered his hand. “May I?” You grabbed his hand as he led you back to the floor.

Nikolai smirked looking back and forth from you to Fyodor. “You two never talked about it, did you.” It wasn’t a question, he could tell.

“Is it really that obvious?” You hate being an open book. Shaking your head you continued. “On second thought don’t answer that. I have a feeling I know the answer.”

“Well then let me ask you a question.” He leaned down to dip you. “Are you happy?” 

You looked over at your husband who raised his glass to you. He looked relaxed and that smile of his left a heat to your cheeks. On one hand you were. Even if everything today was just for show, at least he made the effort for you. Like he always has. You think you’ve finally hit acceptance that Fyodor does care for you and that’s all that matters. 

“I think so.”

Nikolai took another bow as the song ended “If you ever need anything, you know I’ll come running.”

As you turned back around, Chuuya offered his hand. “May I-” Dazai pushed him over and out of the way as you reached out he took your hand and swiftly led you to dance. You could hear Nikolai cackling as the redhead grumbled.

“Hello to you too, Dazai.” You said flatly “I didn’t even know you were coming? I don’t remember Fedya sending you an invitation.”

“Easy, he didn’t! I’m Sigma’s plus one.”

You raised your eyebrows at him “Really? How’d you manage that?”

 “I’ll spare you the details! What I actually wanted to tell you was!”

Fyodor watched the two dance flummoxed as to why Dazai leaned into his wife’s ear. Dazai was wearing a shit eating grin staring him down while (Y/N) seemed very taken aback. Fyodor slammed his drink on the table as he paced over to grab his shoulder. “Dazai.”

“Ah why if it isn’t Fyodor. Again congratulations! Eh? Where are we going?”

You saw Fyodor drag Dazai away as you started dancing with Chuuya. Once they were away from the dance floor Fyodor started interrogating Dazai. “What were you saying to (Y/N)!”

“Aw don’t be like that Fyodor! We were just giving (Y/N) her wedding present. Since you insist on being stubborn we’re playing our own game. Honestly if you’d just tell her yourself it would make things go way smoother but-” Fyodor’s eyes widened perplexed as he looked back at his wife. 

“I did tell you I have my eyes on the sigma family.” Dazai grins as he watches Fyodor storm off to collect his wife. Sigma crossed his arms. “Must you keep saying it like that you’re going to give him the wrong idea.”

“He can think what he wants. Although I’m surprised you didn’t tell your sister anything.” Dazai shrugged as Sigma pinched the bridge of his nose. “I doubt she would believe me if I did. Even Nikolai couldn’t convince her.”

Out of nowhere Nikolai appeared behind them. “In all fairness I was being selfish but they really are made for each other, huh.”

___

Chuuya sighed as Dazai was dragged away. “It’s about time you two got married, everyone's been sick of seeing the two of you dance around the subject. Dazai in particular has been trying to make it everyone’s problem.”

You were confused “Chuuya what are you talking about and what Dazai said I don’t-”

Chuuya cut you off “As a wedding gift we planned on telling you since that anemic bastard doesn’t have the balls to say it out loud, but-” Chuuya stopped as Fyodor put a hand on his shoulder. “I’d like to spend some time with my wife. If you don’t mind.” The touch to the shoulder contained all the malice that his words lacked.

You looked back at Chuuya as your husband whisked you away. You thought he was going to go back to your seats but he kept on walking out to the car. He refused to let go of your hand as the vehicle drove away. It wasn’t headed towards your manor but it also wasn’t headed towards the Dostoevsky’s estate either. It was slightly unnerving that Fyodor wasn’t talking. You had so many questions and not enough answers. Dazai told you that he gave Fyodor your chocolates during Valentine’s day but he didn’t get to tell you how he reacted to receiving them before Fyodor dragged him away. Chuuya also didn’t get to finish his sentiment, it just left you more confused. It also begged the question why they bothered meddling in the first place.

You had been so lost in thought that you didn’t notice driving up to a new manor. One that you had never seen before. Fedya got out of the car and held out his hand. You thought he was going to help you out of the car but he scooped you up in his arms and walked into the estate. “Fedya, I can walk just fine! Where are we going?” Being this close to him caused your face to heat up. He had such a determined look on his face. It never occurred to you what would happen after the wedding. You were trying to take things one day at a time. Realistically you know what should happen next but you're unsure if that interests Fyodor at all.

“What did Dazai say to you?” His tone was dark and it honestly scared you a little. You’ve never been on the receiving end of this attitude. Sure sometimes he would be annoyed or irritated, you’ve witnessed him get snappy with people but it was never directed at you. 

You stammered out trying to collect your thoughts. “I don’t understand wh-” He placed you down a little carelessly causing you to flop backwards on the bed. Honestly you were surprised he could carry you. Physical strength has never been his expertise. When you were younger he used to get winded very easily.

He loomed over you with a hard look on his face. His jaw was tense and his eyes had you frozen in place. The Fyodor you know would never hurt you but you don’t think you’ve ever seen him this distressed before. The position you were in under Fyodor brought back flashbacks from your first kiss. It makes you hot with shame because this is definitely not the time for that thought.

“You’ve been acting strangely ever since the engagement. What has Dazai been instigating! If someone else is coming between us I-” He huffed with slight bewilderment, had he truly made such a dire miscalculation? You were his, Fyodor has been certain of that for years. Your heart belongs to him. He didn’t understand why the game had suddenly changed when he was finally so close to achieving his goals. 

“Tell me, do you not love me anymore?”

Anymore? You felt a pang in your chest. Of course he knew about your feelings, everyone else did. Wait, was that why he married you? Fyodor has always put his comfort aside for your sake. Is that what Nikolai was trying to tell you? Before it even registered to your brain the words fell out of your mouth “No, it’s always been you.” Frustrated with yourself your brows knit together as you turned away from him. “I don't think I could ever love someone else.” You didn't mean to divulge that last bit of information but you feel slightly less guilty about the situation somehow. Maybe confirming that he knew was enough validation? Your face was flushed and you could hear your heart working overtime. Although it's not fair for you to be cornered like this. You hated it but you couldn't bring yourself to push him away. You didn't want to see his expression but you felt his weight shift as his hair tickled your neck.

His hot breath warmed your ear as his tone dripped sweetly like molten honey. “Then why have you been acting so reluctant to be my wife?” the smugness was radiating from his being as he lazily smirked at you. He loved that he could finally call you that. His wife. Fyodor doesn’t think he'll stop saying it anytime soon. It stirs too much pride and euphoria in his being that he finds his own heart buzzing in his chest.

“Because you didn't choose to marry me!” You whipped your attention back to his handsome albeit slightly confused face.

Fyodor was taken aback, flabbergasted even. “I beg your pardon?” 

Didn't choose to marry you? Did you really not notice his affection towards you? He thought it was abundantly clear from the beginning. 

He's been enamored with you from the start. When you went missing he was the first person to drop everything to go find you. He should have been paying closer attention back then but he was complacent knowing your fondness towards him. He was the anonymous tip that got rid of your understudy for good. Fyodor purposely gave you his first kiss which should have made his sentiments towards you increasingly obvious given his extreme avoidance towards physical contact. As much as he did that for you, he selfishly wanted to indulge in your innocence together. During your year apart he wrote you letters religiously but thinking back, it would have been easy for Nikolai to tamper with those. He frowns to himself that there was that possibility but he supposed it's not important now. Fyodor told you that the moon was beautiful! Which is the most poetic way of saying I love you in the Japanese language. How could you have missed that? Your last literature exam was literally about Natsume Soseki and his works. He was increasingly frustrated with the fact that you dismissed it so easily. Much to his dismay your Japanese language scores were higher than his but he'd never openly disclose that. Nikolai has always ridiculed him for it.

“You heard me,” propping yourself on your elbows, you snapped him out of his racing thoughts. “Our parents decided that. They've been pulling the strings since we were kids. You said so yourself. My father took advantage of the fact that I harbored romantic feelings towards you!”

“And you think I don’t return the sentiment?” He cradled your face in his hand. “When have I ever sowed such disbelief in my love for you.”

“Then why didn't you propose to me yourself!” Your face was hot with embarrassment. Fyodor's thumb brushed away your frustrated tears.

With a loving smile he denoted “When I asked your father for your hand in marriage I may or may not have had some unforeseen complications.” Fyodor looked away abashedly remembering how unprepared he was for your father’s ecstatic reaction to his wedding plans. “One thing led to another and well, your father and I got carried away in our discussions and I may have accidentally promised that he would have the honors of relaying the proposal announcement.” he rubbed his face, not one of his best moments but there was a lot at stake so it was easier to comply. At the time he was certain it wouldn't change the trajectory of the engagement overall so he brushed it off. “Likewise the article about our family's merger was one of the other tasks he had me fulfill before giving his approval. Similarly that “business conference” I was forced to attend was merely a front so as not to raise suspicion. What I was actually doing was buying this estate.” He had been manipulating everything behind the scenes to be so perfect that he might have forgotten you would not see it the same way.

“All of that and you couldn't just say I love you.” You were perturbed. Fyodor was out here playing 4D chess yet he couldn't ease your mind by saying three simple words? Wholeheartedly you were astonished this never came up sooner. 

“I supposed I could have stated the obvious, yes.” The strain on his face didn't go unnoticed. He was dancing around the subject and while you had a revelation over it he still didn't admit to it outright. “Would you like me to prove it to you?” If the words were to ever leave his lips he's sure the elated rush would cause him to faint. He feels too intensely about the unfolding of his affection. Instead he captures your lips with such a passionate effervescence that you nearly forgot what you were asking for.

“I want to hear you say it.” 

It was breathy leaving your mouth. A plea to confirm that this was truly what Fyodor wanted and not just some trick. He paused for a moment intaking a shaky breath. You felt Fyodor's weight shift as he dipped his lips to your ear and whispered.

“I love you more than life itself and tonight you will be forever mine.”

Your breath hitched as Fyodor's hands explored your body. You wrapped your arms around him as he pulled you impossibly closer. It was mind numbing how much your body reacted to him. A simple touch to the shoulder burned hotter than a blue flame as he somehow found the time to undress you in the position you were in. Your head was so focused on the indulgent kisses that you didn’t even notice Fyodor being stripped away of his layers by your hands. Soon both of you were laid bare as you assessed your beating hearts. Lust dripped from his expression as his fingers caressed your inner thighs.

You moaned as he kissed down your jaw, slipping fingers into your wetness. The pleasure swirling your core causes your walls to pulse around his digits as he continues to pepper kisses down your torso. Worshiping every inch of your body with a near systematic discipline as he unraveled your patience. You were a mess of barely coherent thoughts by the time he got a taste of you. Such an overwhelming rush had you gasping and convulsing on his hand as he gazed up at your disheveled state. 

You watched with half lidded eyes as he lapped up your sweet nectar placing himself just above your entrance no doubt waiting for your approval as he stroked himself with what remained on his hand. 

Coming down from you high you managed to pant. “Please Fedya, I need all of you.” The absence of his fingers only stirred your arousal more.

“Anything for you, my love.” He leaned down to kiss you once more before his member vanished inside of you. Fyodor shuddered and groaned at the sensation as your toes curled with the new depth he could achieve. You watched as his carefully crafted composure shatter with each thrust. Only you could elicit such expressions from Fyodor. Sweet nothings tumbled out of your mouth as choked moans and lustful requests. Your breath hitched as his hips jolted forward and that familiar build of pleasure snapped again making you see stars. He collapsed on top of you catching his breath. In the afterglow he placed a kiss to the crook of your neck bringing you back from your hazy stupor. The words had been bubbling in your throat but only desperate pleas  had escaped your mouth until now. Fyodor had known of your love from the beginning but you've never expressed it out loud.

“I love you.”

You could feel him smile into your skin as he retaliated. “I love you most.”

___

Tagslist: @skullyz1 , @tttttttf , @ayameshu

[iwriteasfotini]

I am currently in a writing block until December 21. Asks or direct messages will reach me, but I won't be on tumblr as often. Here is a recent little update.

Our Love is Written in the Stars

......EVERYONE HAS A STORY...... ......Always...... ......What is this series?...... ......OLIWITS Reference Materials on AO3...... >>>This is a very interactive post, click around!<<<

The Heir and The Spare

Sirius POV, first year at Hogwarts / COMPLETE ON AO3 Rating: Mature tumblr THATS master post

The Prince's Pact - Year Two, Severus POV (24 Chapters, ~122K words) Rating: Mature Posting to Begin 12/21/24

The Bonds of Friendship - Year Three, James POV (27 Chapters, ~139k words) Rating: Mature Posting to Begin 2/14/25

The Heart of the Lion - Year Four/Three, Regulus POV (34 chapters, ~171K words) Rating: Mature Posting to Begin 4/13/25

The Wolf and The Star - Year Five, Remus POV (32 chapters, ~173K words) Rating: Mature Posting to Begin 7/11/25

The Changing Times - Year Six, Lily POV (38 chapters, ~194K words) Rating: Mature Posting to Begin 9/1/25

The Battered Boy - Year Seven/Six, Barty POV (9 chapters, ~47K words) Posting to Begin 10/31/25

Main Ships

Jegulus

Endgame Jegulus in a canonesque story. I mean, is there anything else to say?

Wolfstar

There is no who fell first, who liked who first. It is an angsty waiting game because they are both idiots. And when they finally fall they fall so hard they crash down three flights of stairs.

Snily

They love each other. But he's closed off, and she's a free spirit. From him, she only wants the one thing he can never give her, so he will never be enough.

Rosekiller

Barty has a crush on Regulus. Evan has a crush on Regulus. Regulus only sees James. So Evan and Barty find each other instead. They fall for each other. They become the next giant tragedy (because this story doesn't have enough already).

Music

This series has two main theme songs, then each book has one/two theme songs. Plus sometimes I have a song attached to a chapter, which means each installment has its own playlist.

>>>Master Playlist<<< (Theme songs only - very short playlist)

>>>Epic Playlist<<< (Every single song in order, really really epic)

The above will grow in length as I post each installment. I will be sharing all of my playlists from Spotify.

Other things to know:

*If you are a minor, please do not engage in content I rate Explicit. This if for my safety and yours. My Explicit content on Ao3 is locked to members only.*

Author Notes

This story contains a large cast of queer characters who may or may not label themselves. There are also characters who identify as trans and nonbinary. And I'll say it until I'm blue in the face, I know this isn't realistic of the time period. Who cares!

Rating will for the series is MATURE, with alternate Explicit chapters offered for a little more descriptive smut.

Posting will happen daily beginning on the scheduled day and continue at one chapter per day until each installment is complete. Then a few weeks of break between installments, for my sanity and to let people catch up.

Warning: People who have sensitivity to the following themes should approach this work with caution. It gets DARK. I will use trigger warnings by chapter and much of this does not begin until year five or later.

Underage drinking; underage recreational drug use; profanity; domestic abuse; blood; animal harm/death; self harm including attempting suicide; death; violence; grief; psychological abuse; torture; nonconsensual sex/sexual abuse; minor homophobia; sexual content; sexual themes

A final note:

If this sounds like an enticing series to you, you are welcome to follow me or the tag (#Our Love is Written in the Stars). You can also follow this pinned post as I update it regularly. This is a major passion project. I am writing 100% for me but I think some of you might also enjoy it, so I'm going to share.

Thanks for taking the time to read this introduction post. I hope to see you in the comments on Ao3. Cheers!

*I do not agree with the original author's personal beliefs, obviously.*

*I DO NOT USE AI to write, ever. At all. Just no.*

Things about me:

Fics I've Read / My Fandom Related Rants / I Want to Be an Author

[missmagooglie]

The promo for next week is what made it clear that Buck is regressing regressing. All that bullshit he's suggesting to Chim? All those proposals that Bobby (correctly) said were just a list of potential calls?

That's Season 1 Buck talking. That's Early Abby Days, pre She Needs You To Step Inside With Her Buck who wants love and romance but doesn't know what it's supposed to look like. That's a version of Buck who isn't ready for something quite so grown up.

Our Buck, Season 6 Buck, knows better than that. He knows Chimney and he knows Maddie and if he stopped and thought about it for half a second he would realize that a big showy proposal isn't right for them. He'd realize that the right approach is something more personal, more intimate. It's Chimney sitting Maddie down and saying, 'we both know there are plenty of reasons we "should" get married, but let me take a minute to make sure you understand the reasons I want to marry you', and giving Maddie space to express all the reasons she's hesitant rather than putting her on the spot with something public that pressures her into saying yes without a conversation.

Buck's been different since the lightning strike, sure. It was a big event, it had a profound psychological effect. But I think the bigger issue here is that Buck has been growing and changing and maturing for the past 6 seasons and he hasn't had a chance yet to properly acknowledge that to himself and update his self-concept. I think the reason we're seeing Buck regress so hard is because he's consciously trying to act like "the same old Buck", but his understanding of "what it means to be Buck" hasn't kept up with the growth he's been doing.

At the gravesite, Buck says he feels like Natalia "really sees him" - which, let's be real, is an insane thing to say about a person you've just met on a good day. And he's saying it to Eddie, who the writers have made abundantly clear is the one person who most sees Buck and understands him and has seen his growth and his insecurities even when others don't.

But the thing I think Buck is getting from Natalia is actually the opposite of what Buck thinks he's getting from her. When Buck says "she sees me", he means "She only sees this me. She doesn't know the man who died, just the man who woke up again."

And while there is some value in that, mostly in allowing himself to be his "now" self without worrying about how it might or might not align with his past self, I think Buck also needs someone who can help him understand that those two versions of himself are closer to each other than he thinks. And the version of himself he's trying to be for the sake of everyone else (ie "the same old Buck") is not the version of him that his loved ones lost at the top of that ladder.

The lightning strike changed Buck - after all, how could it not? And Buck, being someone who is so used to being left behind, is naturally worried that changing who he is will cause the people he loves to leave. But that isn't something Buck needs to be afraid of, because he's been changing for a long time now and he has people who love every version of him, and will continue to love every version that comes next.

And I keep thinking about that choice to have Christopher fall asleep on the couch just like Buck did, the way it puts Christopher and Buck in the same category for Eddie - that category of "family" and "home". Because Christopher is changing too. He's growing up. The man he is going to slowly become is not the same person as the boy he is now, and it is understood that while some of that growth might be painful it is normal and natural and to be expected. And there is not a single direction in which Christopher could grow that would make Eddie love him even a little bit less.

When Buck realizes that Eddie loves him the same way? That there is no version of Buck that Eddie will not love with his whole heart? And when he doesn't just realize it, but actually believes it?

That's the endgame, baby.

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

One thing I really don't get is the 'argument' ZKs use that there was apparently supposed to be a scene of Uncle Iroh saying "Zuko and Katara are made for each other." in one of the final episodes but it was cut out by Bryke.

Like let's just assume for a moment that is true and they cut out a scene like that. So? Why is it such a big deal? I mean, having a scene like that would just be plain stupid. Why is Iroh out of nowhere just saying that these kids are apparently 'made for each other' when the Sozin's comet is a day away. What good would it do????

Bruh, that's a CLASSIC cope of obviously fanon ships that were never seriously considered as a possible endgame by the writers. "There was totally a deleted scene in the finale confirming these two were going to get together, but it was all changed at the last second because of the showrunners/network/audience pressure!"

A non-canon ship I really like, Robin and Raven from Teen Titans 2003, had a TON of fans that pulled that crap and kept insisting that their hug after the world is saved in the season 4 finale (that was originally going to be the last episode of the show before the Network decided to give it an extra season) was actually orignally meant to be a kiss, confirming they had romantic feelings for each other and were going to be a couple from now on.

I saw that shit EVERYWHERE for a long while, and even though they were my OTP at the time, I just never believed it - and eventually, of course, the writers themselves said they never really had any other endgame couple planned other than Starfire and Robin (even though Beast Boy and Raven shippers love to pretend the writers said BOTH ships were supposed to be endgame, even though, other than the few flirty moments he had with Raven, Beast Boy's love interest was clearly Terra, and he didn't end up with either of them because, again, the writers explicitly said they only cared about making ONE pairing endgame).

Even though season four is basically THE RobRae season since their dynamic is explored and treated as very special and important, it is still VERY clear that any shippy vibes between them were either accidental or the writers toying with ideas, but without ever really considering straying from the original plan - the episode before the season finale even had Robin and Starfire almost become an item before the plot interrupts their moment. There's just no way the writers would do that, then make Robin and Raven kiss at the end. They even had Raven turn into a little girl and Robin protect and care for her, telling her the story of her own life almost like he was reading her a bedtime story, and Raven explicitly says she was raised by her friends and they are her real family. It's just very clear that we were meant to think of them as having a sort of sibling dynamic - I'd argue the writers exagerated a bit and accidentally created a great ship´, but their INTENTION is easily identifiable in the text.

It's the same thing with Avatar. The Kataang falling out was clearly just the classic "main couple can't actually get together until the finale for extra drama", and just a few episodes before that we had gotten confirmation that, even though he felt leaving the Fire Nation was the right thing, Zuko was still very much in love with Mai - and her saving him from getting captured pretty much screams "They'll get back together once this conflict is resolved." Kataang was set up from the very beginning of the story, and we got our first hints of Maiko in the third episode of the second season.

Meanwhile, Zuko and Katara had only truly started bonding in the second half of the last season. No minimally inteligent writer or network would EVER consider making THAT pairing become endgame instead of the much more developed ones, regardless of it's popularity, because it'd just break the show's narrative.

And why would IROH, who had not seen Zuko and Katara interact and bond at all since he wasn't there when it happened, say they're perfect for each other, like he knew anything about how their dynamic worked? Iroh had no way of being sure if they were the best of friends, close friends, or just two people that had friends in common but didn't really have any emotional connection with each other.

It's just very clearly trying to take advantage of Iroh's image of "THE wisest character in the whole show" (which is debatable even if he is obviously pretty wise, AND would still not mean "always correct" even if it was 1000% true) to try and go "See? Uncle Iroh agrees with me, so you have to do the same." As an Azula fan, I see that ALL the time.

Plus, I wouldn't be surprised if they're also stealing from the Zuko and Jin romance, as Iroh was very encouraging of that relationship being a thing. Once again, Zutarians claim their ship was TOTALLY in the plans for being endgame, and all their proof for it is just stuff their stole from other pairings and slapped their own ship's name to it.

[theemporium]

We’re going to bake us a really great Christmas catastrophe but first we need the ingredients:

start with a loving but insecure boyfriend that is a little clingy and needs constant reassurance, all while still trying to live his life, Lando seems like a good pick for this

next you throw in a distinguished pretty boy, a man that has been there done that and craves stability with just a dash of youthful adventure, maybe Carlos or Danny

the two main ingredients need to go well with each other, an I’ll timed long lasting mostly unrequited crush is a must, if you can’t find any homegrown store bought pining is fine

to really start our angst off we need an illtimed threesome a little while before the holidays, maybe at the end of the season. emotions are high and your man is little drunk and a lottle horny and loverboy looked especially tasty so he can’t help but finally let his attraction slip (not like you hadn’t known for ages) who could blame him, looking at his attractive friend certainly didn’t turn you off. so you ask him to bed and get both your worlds and bodies rocked several times because yes he’s just that good.

(Fell mid angst again, can’t be bothered to keep up the format)

Anyway you and Lando have a super mega awesome threesome with bestie and everything is going great until it isn’t.

You’re into Christmas so obviously you need to find the perfect gift for Lando and Carlos/Danny is hopeless when it comes to shopping for his family so you team up at his request to find the perfect gifts.

(Fell asleep again)

So obviously you start spending a lot of time together and being kinda secretive to Lando and he starts going through it. Because in your mind it’s innocent enough like yeah you fucked Carlos/Daniel and it’s been amazing you love Lando more then anything. But when Lando follows you one day he doesn’t see that. He sees dangerously close cheek kisses and him bringing you coffee and carrying your bags like it’s a date.

So Lando is sad because he thinks you changed your mind after the threesome and picked the better man and he can’t even be mad because he loves the two of you but he doesn’t want to lose you so he’s acting weird and cagey and you’re secretive and bestie is falling for you while feeling like a pos for betraying Lando

poly endgame obviously but there has to be some misinformation angst

poor baby lando😭

[grymmnox]

weekly fic recs #21

not mcuh this week BUT what i have read is mostly longfics so

fandom(s): bungo stray dogs

ship(s): soukoku, some tachihara/chuuya (none of it is endgame), and ofc some gen fics

Oneshots

i see the totality of understanding; like_squid_ink - bungo stray dogs

not rated | 4.6k words | dazai & kunikida, atsushi & dazai, ADA & dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

"That’s right, isn’t it wonderful?” He sang, leaning back in his chair and letting his head fall back. His eyes wandered over to the window nearest to him, as his neck strained over the back of his chair. There was something poetic to be said about the drops of rain sliding down the glass. If he touched the window, it would be cold. Would it be colder than his hand? He wasn’t sure.

It was a beautiful day outside, and Dazai was going to kill himself.

(or, dazai does not kill himself: the fic)

Completed Fics

Everything or Nothing; Wellthathappened (Cataclysmic_Calamity) - bungo stray dogs

explicit (sexual content) | 40 (actual) chapters | 264.9k words | chuuya/dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

College AU where Chuuya finds out that the boy he drunkenly made out with the night of orientation is his new roommate.

His arrogant, smug, very straight roommate.

And the boys are each convinced the other is trying to ruin their life by making them go absolutely insane.

success is harder than failure; seneca_milestone17 - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 15 chapters | 9.2k words | ADA & dazai, dazai & PM | READ TAGS

summary:

Dazai Osamu, age 22, winds up sixteen years in the past after a certain Rat manages to get the Book and rewrite reality as they know it. No Longer Human saves him and now, he's going to use the opportunity to break Fyodor's plans apart before they even begin.

If he can, that is.

(--Or, local suicidal detective winds up in the past and starts collecting allies like wild Pokemon)

the wheels go round and round; seneca_milestone17 - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 30 chapters | 32.6k words | ADA & dazai, dazai & PM, dazai & original character(s), dazai & fukuzawa

summary:

Dazai Osamu, age 23 and displaced from space-time. He’s supposed to be preparing Yokohama from the incoming threat that looms beyond with his Detective Agency.

How said Agency ended up becoming a pseudo-daycare center is beyond him.

(--in which after Dazai collects allies like pokemon, he ends up collecting wild children next)

Incomplete Fics

I Look Up at the Gaps of Sunlight; eggs_angel - bungo stray dogs

not rated | 14/26 chapters | 34.7k words | chuuya/dazai, past chuuya/tachihara, chuuya & shirase & yuan, chuuya & kenji, dazai & oda, chuuya & kouyou | READ TAGS

summary:

“What’s a third year doing in algebra two?” Dazai asks, turning his chair to Chuuya’s direction. He’s a little flustered at his blunt attitude, but answers anyway. “Well, I suck at math,” he replies. “Thought that’d be obvious.” Dazai chuckles a little at his wording. Chuuya can be blunt, too. “We can’t all be good at it. What’s your favorite subject, then?” Dazai is playing a little game of twenty questions. Chuuya just wants the conversation to be over, but considers his query. He’s not the brightest, but loves socializing and being outdoors. “I’d have to say P.E.” Chuuya decides, continuing with “how about you?” “Eh, English is probably my top choice, but math is a close second,” he grins. “If you ever need a study buddy, you could always ask me,” Dazai slyly offers his ingenuine help. Chuuya rolls his eyes. This guy is more arrogant than he’d heard, and Chuuya definitely doesn’t need his help. “I’ll be fine.”

Or, the one where Chuuya does indeed need Dazai's help. Little does he know that math tutoring can very quickly spiral into something much more...

forgiveness (like my reflection in the water); silencvial - bungo stray dogs

teen and up | 2/5 chapters | 10.6k words | akutagawa & atsushi, atsushi & dazai, atsushi & kyouka

summary:

Our dearly beloved Atsushi from canon and our deeply hurt Atsushi from BEAST switch places. It's less like accidentally walking into a circus and more like being violently drop-kicked into a burning swamp. With mutant alligators. And trauma.

“Atsushi-kun, are you alright?”

That is a funny question for all of two seconds before he registers the name. Atsushi-kun.

He almost chokes on his own spit. The Agency people stare at him in concern, like they're confused to see him unwell, when he’s definitely attacked them before. His senses are in overdrive. The infirmary has three possible exits and he has a clear view of all of them—he's cornered in which isn't the best for movement but good for sight—and then he moves on to an attack plan because no man calls him Atsushi-kun except for Dazai, and the man staring back at him is definitely not Dazai.

alternatively: an atsushi? in MY alternate reality? it's more likely than you think!

Unexpected; lemoncandy751 - bungo stray dogs

mature | 17/25 chapters | 71.5k words | chuuya/dazai | READ TAGS

summary:

Dazai Osamu was, without a doubt, the most popular person attending Yokohama High School. All the guys respected him, and almost all the girls wanted to be with him. Everybody knew this, and because of that, he had almost everyone wrapped around his fingers.

Almost.

Chuuya Nakahara was widely known throughout the school as someone not to be messed with. His short temper and bad attitude have landed him in one-too-many fights. Because he tended to beat up anybody who looked at him wrong, he was the second most respected person attending Yokohama High School.

Being in second place was infuriating to Chuuya. So, while he had never talked to him personally, Chuuya hated Dazai.

So when their art teacher choose them as partners for their mid-term project, Chuuya could not be more irritated.

ok cool im going back to writing (using the term lightly im honestly not getting much done) enjoy the fics

[all-the-words-unspoken]

Fairytale 2/5/23

A fork in the road

A story that’s long been told

About a girl and a boy

Who fall in love at something years old

They started off as friends

There for each other till the bitter end

Then they discover

They loved each other

But here’s a plot twist in my story

That started with a kiss

It was no fairytale

But it couldn’t be missed

The magical way we meshed well together

At one point it felt like it could be for forever

But forever isn’t for us after all

Sometimes I feel like I made a mistake

When I said goodbye

And ended our story

When I walked away and it all got so messy

I’m thinkin bout the good times

The memories trapped in the frames

The old photos in my phone

That make my heart swell as much as they make my heart break

A decision that changed my life

Didn’t come easy

I took my time

Gave it my all

But at the end of the day it was never our story at all

We were mere side characters in each others chapters

Passing love interests to help each other grow

But we were never endgame

We were never meant to be

But that doesn’t meant it doesn’t still hurt me

A fork in the road

A story that’s long been told

About a girl and a boy

Who fall in love at something years old

They started off as friends

There for each other till the bitter end

Then they discover

They loved each other

Except that wasn’t a hundred percent true

The story is much more complicated

It’s not so binary

They started off as acquaintances

That grew to be friends

But they don’t tell the part where sometimes he annoyed me till no end

Then they grew closer

But fun fact the girl is bi

(But all that means is they can share their appreciation for a woman’s thighs )

The lines get a little blurred

Then we kiss and then we soar

Then we go the distance

Living separate but joining in the middle

Oh but wait that’s not true cuz

I’m the one who always flew to you

And wonder why our communication

Got so strained

At the ends of the day

It just felt like friends with a little extra something

And you wanted a future

I could not give

Sounding like pretty soon a picket fence house

Cute little wife and bundle of kids

And all the time I know

I made the right choice

I’m letting you go

You’re not the prince in my story

And I don’t need someone to save me

And I don’t need to be someone’s only savior and reason for living

It’s just too much pressure

And it’s through this I see all the reasons why

I couldn’t fall in love no matter hard I tried

[homemade-ghosts]

watching as rinis and pws say rina is gonna crash and burn like the other relationships bc they can’t keep ppl together is so 😭😭 the narrative of the season is rina together is the love they both deserve. pw was a plot device from the beginning and rini literally had ricky regressing by the end of s1 yet i was supposed to assume they wouldn’t crash and burn? rina will no doubt have problems in s4 but they’ll prevail unlike others …they can keep couples together but just like with every other teen drama midgames happen before the endgame 😭😭

After all this time, after interviews with the literal showrunner & creator of the show that confirm everything we've been saying, they still don't get it.

Both Rini & pw were built to fall apart and reducing their respective breakups to just being for the sake drama or because "the writers are incapable of keeping couples together" is a disservice to every character involved.

The Rini breakup was a huge sign of development for both Ricky & Nini. For Ricky, it meant letting go of his past, accepting his parents’ separation and embracing change. A part of Ricky resented his parents for not trying “hard enough”, for not “fighting” to save their marriage. Being with Nini was not only a way for Ricky to hold on to the last shred of his past, of his life before things were complex and difficult and confusing and changing -- but it was also a way for Ricky to try to prove, to both his parents & himself, that any relationship can be fixed if you just try really, really hard. Ricky wanted to believe that things don’t have to change if you don’t let them change -- but the more he tried to keep his relationship with Nini together, the more it became obvious that it was breaking apart at the seams. Ricky’s desire for stability & sameness was in direct opposition to Nini’s desire for the unpredictable & the new -- no amount of deleted comments or attempts at getting Nini into the musical were going to change that. In the end, Ricky realized that he & Nini couldn’t give each other what they needed or wanted anymore. When he did the mature thing and broke up with his first love -- this representation of his past/childhood -- it was an indication that he was growing up, finally ready to say goodbye to a part of himself that he outgrew a long time ago. Even if it hurt to realize it, he knew that his mom had been right all along, “Not all couples are meant to be together. Sometimes people change.”

For Nini, their breakup meant independence & room to breathe. She felt suffocated in her relationship with Ricky and she knew that he loved her not for who she was, but for what she represented (”am I something to you and not someone? ‘Cause I feel trapped on this pedestal you put me on.”) + Nini has, canonically, always been the kind of girl who judges herself by what boys see in her (in s1, Kourtney quite literally told her this & in s2, she wrote/sang the lyric “all my life I’ve seen myself through your eyes”). Gone is the girl who needed EJ’s encouragement to feel she was even worthy of auditioning for Gabriella at the beginning of the series. Gone is the girl who ran back to the safety of East High when YAC got too difficult. Now she finally has the confidence & self esteem to really go for what she wants. She realized that it’s her opinion of herself that matters. Ricky wanted her to be someone she hasn’t been for a long, long time -- but now Nini’s life gets to be solely about what she wants. 

People who ship Rini (In this, the year of our lord Tim Federle, 2022? Embarrassing.) really do not care about Ricky & Nini as individual characters at all because they hindered each other’s character development and became the worst versions of themselves (Ricky: clingy & vaguely controlling / Nini: neglectful & gaslighting) when they were together. 

pw was quite literally built, like you said, to be a plot device for Rina. Gina told Ricky she doesn’t do anything right the first time and EJ being her first relationship/boyfriend is a representation of that. EJ’s inability to share things with, support, listen to, show up for or understand Gina showed her that Ricky can, has & will do all of those things for her and more. EJ showed Gina the kind of love she deserves by not giving it to her.

Ricky & Gina had to be with and breakup with Nini & EJ, respectively, in order for them to be fully ready for each other.

In the immortal words of the great philosopher Taylor Swift:

Sometimes giving up is the strong thing Sometimes to run is the brave thing Sometimes walking out is the one thing That will find you the right thing

[chaotictarlos]

••• it was always you | tarlos

For: @tarlosweeklypropmpt 24 hour challenge. Prompt: After trying to be together and it falling apart, TK and Carlos work now as coworkers seeing each other at scenes and sometimes at 126 hangouts. One night they end up hanging out alone and they start thinking about the past and what could have been. Will they find their way back to each other?

Pairing: Tarlos | Rating: General | Words: 3333 | Warnings: Angst, Break-up, Make-up, Getting back together, Fluff, hurt / comfort, mutual pinning, boys in love, tarlos is endgame, love confessions, confession of love, exs to lovers, 

Summary: Sometimes in order to find out just how much you’re meant to be with someone, you have to fall apart and lose them first. 

Author's Note: I love angst, that’s not even a secret, and I loved writing for this prompt so much. My favorite is always going to be angsty with a happy ending. I hope you enjoy this story as much as I enjoyed writing it. Comments, Reblogs, and Kudos are always welcome and help me thrive as a writer.

Nobody has permission to save, translate, repost, upload, or do anything with my fics. My fics are only posted on AO3, if you see them on any other site such as wattpad please let me know.  This story was written for an adult audience and is intended for adult consumption. If you are under the age of 18, you should not be reading this story.

-

“It’s just not our time.” Carlos said, his voice soaked through with a sadness that pushed it’s way into TK’s heart, making it grow cold and numb as it started to settle in that they were really doing this.

They were breaking up.

TK cleared his throat, willing the thick lump of emotions that had built and made their home at the base of his neck to go away just long enough that he could get through this conversation without breaking apart in front of Carlos. He couldn’t let Carlos see just how much this was breaking his world apart. This was a mutual decision and he couldn’t let it come across as anything other than that.

“You’re right, it’s not.” TK mutters, his voice breaking even as he tries hard to keep it together. “I just wish it was. You’re so good Carlos, don’t even think you’re not. You’re deserving of someone who can make you happy and provide you with the life that you deserve.”

Carlos reaches for TK, grabbing his hand and holding it tightly in his. “And you are too.”

TK looks at him, eyes blurring with tears that he desperately tried to hold in, but when he sees his own broken heart echoed in the face of Carlos he can’t hold it in anymore. He pulls Carlos in, wrapping his arms around his waist and presses his face into the crook of Carlos' neck. He lets the tears fall, mourning the loss of the relationship that they had. 

It takes Carlos a moment before he does the same, his own face finding his favorite spot against TK’s neck, in the crook where he can breath in his scent and feel the steady beat of his heart.

They held each other tightly as they allowed the tears to fall, mourning the loss of something that meant so much to them, together. They might have come to the decision to step away from dating each other, from being together, as a team but it didn’t make it hurt any less. In fact, it hurt worse knowing that they both still wanted each other but couldn’t continue down the road that they were on. They had to do this, to step away from each other for their own sake.

Love was funny. It could hurt you just as much as it could make you happy.

READ MORE ON AO3

tags: @strangefurychaos @homosexualstrand @sapphire11 @malexsoulmates @angeltk @detective-giggles @noxsoulmate (if you want to be added to my tag list just let me know)

[free-pool-trash]

happiness - peter maximoff

yay a new peter fic <3 i was feeling a little unmotivated for a few days (since our boy wasn’t in episode 8 at all :/) but im back 😎 although im back in school so i might be on and off for a while 😩✋🏻

!!!it’s not a songfic those lyrics at the start are just my inspo!!!

word count: 5k <3 😳

warnings: maybe swearing but i dont think so i cant remember, peter being sad, angst, but mostly fluff, WandaVision spoilers maybe??? I pretty much made up this plot so idk, endgame spoilers, reader was an avenger, kissing but it’s not graphic😽 probably some mistakes yk how it is

feedback is appreciated <3

tagging: @enchantedcruelsummer (should i make a peter maximoff taglist? let me know and I’ll do it)

masterlist

haunted by the look in my eyes that would’ve loved you for a lifetime

leave it all behind

& there is happiness

Loneliness had always been something that plagued him. That and a plethora of other negative emotions.

There wasn’t a day that went by where Peter Maximoff wasn’t made to feel like a loser. Admittedly, he’d never held himself to a high standard, he grew up thinking that he’d never fit in anywhere and eventually that thought mutated into a lifestyle as he began isolating himself from the world around him, either far too good or heartbreakingly not enough to be a part of that crowd.

He liked spending time with himself. Nobody else knew him the way he knew him, and still, he found nothing but an overwhelming hollow space where his deepest most important hopes, aspirations, dreams and self discoveries should have resided.

Peter had always put this feeling of exile down to the fact that he was a mutant, it was the most likely explanation, right?

It was only when he’d decided to join the X-Men that he finally came to the conclusion that maybe the rest of the world wasn’t the problem, nor was his mutation the problem, but that he himself was the problem. For even in a school full of people exactly like him he was still the same loser that he was in his mother’s basement.

And he was under no illusions that that was exactly what his teammates saw in him; nothing. No potential. Just a space holder to bring the numbers up.

Super speed was incredible. That’s how Peter acknowledged jobs well done, he praised his speed but never himself. He just saved Charles and Erik from a room full of armed guards? No that wasn’t him, that was simply his speed. He saved an entire mansion full of people from a potentially fatal explosion? Nothing special, Kurt probably could’ve done the same.

Forget all of the good deeds and saved lives because the bottom line of it all, to him at least, was that all he was good for was cheeky one liners and hopeless kleptomania.

His life took a turn for the worse when he found himself being mind controlled in an alternate universe. And even then, he was playing the part of someone that wasn’t him, the thought humbled him, reconnected him to his roots and reintroduced him to his life long philosophy that he’d never be anything more than a social pariah. Not even an alternate reality could accept him for who he was. There wasn’t a warm welcome and despite not knowing what was going on, the definition of “imposter” or the weirder, “recast”, still shot to kill.

He settled on the notion that he was an inter dimensional waste of space. At least in WestView he could be blissfully ignorant, let the real him be drowned mercilessly in favour of being an integral part of someone’s life- to feel important, even if it wasn’t real.

When WestView fell apart he was completely lost. In every sense of the word. In a new world with no way home and as it turned out, nobody was looking for him. Although he didn’t expect anyone to care, it still stung that nobody did. He always hoped that one day Erik would step up as a father figure for him, this; getting kidnapped and smuggled into a different dimension, seemed like the perfect moment for that epic father son moment, but it wouldn’t surprise Peter if his father has yet to notice his disappearance.

But then, seemingly out of nowhere, he came into contact with a beacon of hope. A guiding star that might possibly lead him to an existence consisting of something other than misery and self loathing.

It offered him a choice; return to being the self proclaimed loser he was known as or start fresh as someone new and mysterious, with first impressions yet to be made and conclusions about him yet to be drawn. Peter had known himself to be rash in the past, when it came to making decisions he had the tendency to act impulsively, never putting too much thought into how his decisions would affect his life in the long term. The choice before him now is no different, he knew exactly what he wanted going forward, however selfish the choice may have been, the second he realised it was an option his heart was set on it.

That previously mentioned beacon of hope arrived to him in the form of a girl, in the form of you. An ex-avenger and close friend of Wanda’s, you were hired by S.W.O.R.D to help them clean up the more ‘sensitive’ fallout that the fall of WestView brought about. Obviously, they were sticking you- the only other avenger with magik- on babysitting and rehabilitation rather than letting you go after your best friend who had gone completely off the rails. Having said that though, you didn’t want anyone else handling him.

You hadn’t watched WandaVision, nor were you even aware that any of it was going on until it had reached a boiling point and you got a call from Monica Rambeau, she’d begged you to come and wait on the edge of town while she went in and act as her eyes on the outside along with Jimmy Woo.

That’s where you stayed until the hex broke down.

As soon as the barrier came down the base you manned was overrun by an armada of terribly confused and distressed citizens, Monica and Wanda were not among them but in their places stumbled in Darcy and the man playing the role of Pietro.

Jimmy appointed himself to Darcy, who in all honesty seemed relatively unscathed by the situation while you made a beeline for the dirty blonde charading as your former, dead teammate.

Peter was, to put it simply, completely enthralled by you as soon as you’d strolled over to him and in the moment he’d put his almost magnetic attraction to you down to the fact that you were the first friendly face he’d seen upon breaking free of Agatha’s possession.

But one thing in particular struck him; you’d asked him his name. You hadn’t immediately assumed him to be some knock off Pietro, as everyone else had. You acknowledged that he had his own personal identity and despite how often he caught himself hating the person he was, he found that when it was torn away from him that he wanted it back. The simple question you posed gave him the opportunity to regain his identity.

“Peter. My name is Peter.” He answered you, almost unsure of himself and you found your interest in the man piqued even further.

He remembered with perfect clarity the way you’d offered him a grin, tilted your hand, extended your hand and said, “Well it’s nice to meet you, Peter. Come on, I’ll be your babysitter for the next while.” There was something about the way you’d laughed after saying the words and the slight, yet unmistakable, glint of mischief in your eyes that had him captivated from the get go.

With you came a whirlwind of new emotions. After only a few weeks of knowing you, Peter noticed he wasn’t as lonely as he had been back home. He didn’t hate himself half as much either, he wasn’t entirely free of self deprovative tendencies and maybe he never would be, but undoubtedly, he likes himself more in this world than he ever had in his last. He thanked you and your determination to make him “a functioning member of society” for that.

It didn’t feel belittling, the way you helped him. You hadn’t dragged him to your favourite mall every weekend just to taunt him about how he couldn’t stop himself from stealing something. Even the very first time, when he’d sped away from you and returned within a second adoring a pair of freshly stolen sunglasses. Your only reaction had been to laugh and casually place your hands on both sides of his face.

“At least remember to take the tag off next time, speedy.” You’d muttered, subtly pulling the tacky stickers off the arms of his shades. No, you weren’t dragging him sight seeing or forcing him to help you go clothes shopping because you thought he was a loser who needed reforming you were doing it because you were a true friend who wanted him to succeed.

The pair of you seemed like two peas in a pod. Which to be fair, you were. Peter Maximoff intrigued you in every sense of the word. He was new, quite literally other worldly, he was kind, he was funny, he was perfectly mischievous and completely wonderful.

What caught your eye the most was the way he held himself, as if he wasn’t entirely comfortable in his own skin. It became apparent to you that he lacked confidence with the phrases he usually tacked onto the ends of his sentences. When you’d invite him to hang out in the beginning his response would always be something along the lines of, “Sure. If you want me to.” But the excitable puppy dog eyes told you that he was dying for someone to want him to tag along some place.

There was a certain understanding between you. You were both more than accustomed with the harrowing feeling of being alone and even though you’d never exactly voiced those thoughts with each other, you couldn’t deny that his was a spirit kindred to your own and he felt it too.

Since the Avengers has disbanded, one of your best friends, Natasha, was dead and your other best friend, Wanda, was gone completely off the rails and the people chasing her wouldn’t let you anywhere near her or even attempt to help pull her out of her darkness. You were being kept as a wildcard in case they needed her taken down. Peter was no stranger to the feeling of being cast aside and so he quickly responded to your frustrations, and in doing so, forced himself out of his comfort zone to be there for you. To his complete shock though, you’d been so appreciative of his efforts.

You never failed to thank him for the little things he did for you, always complimenting his mutation when he’d use it and giving him the recognition he never received at home. The friendship he formed with you was so… two sided, again, something he wasn’t accustomed to before. It didn’t involve him giving everything he had to offer and receiving nothing in return, you matched his energy meticulously and never left him hanging.

In a series of firsts, he didn’t wonder whether or not you genuinely liked him, never feeling the need or want to question it as you’d left him with no reason to doubt.

As he walked around the mall with you now, his mind brought his attention back to the question you’d asked him rather casually a few nights ago. You were both lounging on your couch, watching some ridiculous reality show (a favourite of yours and Peter’s) when you’d turned your head to look at him, a thoughtful look on your face. “Do you think when S.W.O.R.D figures the technology out to crack into other realities, you’ll go back to yours?”

The question had taken him aback for a second, in all honesty, he hadn’t thought about going home, not when he was with you at least and considering he’d become your roommate about three weeks after he got out of WestView, the thought of returning to his old life had barely crossed his mind.

Being an ex-Avenger you were fairly well off, you lived alone in a two bedroom apartment in New York that you’d bought to be closer to Stark tower. Peter had nowhere to go and aside from having a spare room to offer you’d also been sort of lost in the current of the busy city with everyone you once loved in the area either dead, on the run or busy elsewhere.

While the question hadn’t crossed Peter’s mind, it had crossed yours on several occasions. He’d been staying with you for six months and the moment you realised that he was becoming one of the most important people in your life, the thought of him leaving you too weighed on your mind but at the end of the day you wanted him to feel happy. He deserved to feel happy and if going back to his reality brought him that happiness then you’d support him.

“Dunno,” he’d replied, turning to face you, chucking a handful of popcorn at you when you looked incredulous at his response, “To be honest I haven’t really thought about it, m’way too busy babysitting you anyway.” He joked, effortlessly dodging the few pieces of popcorn you attempted to throw at him.

For the last few nights, the question haunted him, but it wasn’t just the question that was bothering him. You were at the forefront of his mind as he replayed the past six months of his life which also happened to be the best six months of his life. WestView put him through hell but coming out the other side of it and meeting you felt like heaven.

He weighed up the pros and cons of returning to his native timeline. The cons: he’d have to leave you behind, he’d go back to being the loser who nobody took seriously, his talents would be downplayed and disregarded and he’d inevitably end up revisiting his lifestyle of solitude. Then there was the pros: he’d get to reunite with his pac man machine. He couldn’t manage to think up anything else.

If he stayed he’d have everything he ever wanted and needed. You’d be there and he knew you always would be, besides he couldn’t leave you knowing that you needed him. If he left who would wake you up when you had night terrors about the catastrophe that your reality was still recovering from? There would be nobody there to comfort you when you woke up from the nightmares, reliving the deaths of Natasha, Tony or Vision and the experience of being snapped out of existence? If he wasn’t there to make you laugh when you were about to cry then who would be? In his heart of hearts he knew you had a huge support system at your disposal, he’d met most of them. Even though he was well aware that Sam visited you as often as he could, that Bucky wrote you letters on a monthly basis and sometimes tagged along with Sam on his visits, that Stephen Strange appeared in your apartment whenever the urge struck him, that the literal god of thunder invited you out for beer whenever he was visiting Earth, that the little spider-kid, also named Peter, swung by your apartment at least once a week to tell you all about school and his good deeds. Despite knowing all of this and knowing all of these people loved you dearly, Peter wanted to be your main source of support, he didn’t want to be someone who came and went, who’d love you then leave you. He wanted to be with you through anything and everything and the feeling that you’d love him for a lifetime had him satisfied with the decision he was about to make.

If leaving his old life meant he could stay here, with you, and experience happiness for more than a fleeting moment then he’d simply; leave it all behind.

“I’ve been thinking about what you asked me the other night.” He spoke through a mouthful of curly fries. You were sitting in the food court of the mall when he decided to let you in on his desire to stay with you indefinitely.

You raised your eyebrow, “You? Putting thought into an answer? Peter, I think I’m starting to become a bad influence on you.” You told him teasingly, taking a long sip of your drink as he rolled his eyes humorously.

“You’re a terrible influence which is exactly why I’ve decided to stay here and put you on the straight and narrow.” The glee you felt at his statement was undeniable, your eyes lit up and your lips curled upwards.

“You’re staying? Really staying?” Your smile was contagious, Peter’s face now painted with a wide grin as he nodded his head.

In a moment of weakness he frantically added, “Y’know only if you want me to though. If you don’t that’s completely cool.” He rushed through the words, feeling more embarrassed when the fond look on your face never faded.

“Of course I want you to stay. You mean a lot to me.” You reassured him, a gentle smile on your lips as you reached across the metal table, intertwining your fingers with his.

Peter squeezed your hand gratefully, holding it in his grasp securely and allowing his smile to return to his face, “I know. You mean a lot to me too.” It was somewhat of an understatement, he was starting to understand that you didn’t just mean a lot, but that you meant everything.

His resolution lifted a huge weight off your shoulders that you wouldn’t be losing yet another best friend. You were glad he’d be with you when everything blew over with Wanda, the two of them definitely had the potential to develop a beautiful sibling relationship and they both deserved that. Of course, Peter would never replace Pietro and having known them both it was obvious just how different the two men were, the only thing they had in common being their powers and last name. Still, he and Wanda would still be able to work on it. He didn’t hate her after WestView and you knew Wanda well enough to know that she was kind hearted and she’d be more than willing to give him a chance. When she eventually comes back to her senses, that it.

As the months went on, life with you and Peter seemed to only get better. You never stopped laughing, your nightmares died down and Peter had taken on a whole new lease of life. Yourself and Peter were the perfect example of meeting the right person at the right time, you balanced each other out and accentuated the other’s good qualities.

Peter could now say with complete confidence that he was happy and what’s more is that he was finally sure that he was making someone happy.

Up until nearly eleven months of living together your relationship had been purely platonic, save for the constant flirting but flirtation pretty much ran in yours and Peter’s blood. Peter wasn’t going to lie to himself, he’d fallen for you the second you’d peeled the security tags off his stolen sunglasses.

You, on the other hand, had been fighting with yourself because yes, you love Peter but you couldn’t have told him when there was the possibility he’d eventually leave and now so much time has passed and you’ve got such a good thing going you didn’t have it in you to ruin it.

However, all of that changed when your original Maximoff best friend came knocking on your door.

Wanda was on the run. She’d caused an amazing amount of chaos but Stephen Strange and S.W.O.R.D were hot on her trail and now she needed a place to lay low with the twins. She figured there was no place more reliable to go than to the always open arms of her best friend, who conveniently had a divinity for earth magik and could muster up a protective barrier without raising suspicions. And that’s exactly where she found herself; outside your door.

You’d been chasing Peter around the apartment when you heard the knock on the door. Peter was on the opposite end of the kitchen to you, using the bar as a shield from you. “You better get that.”

“Oh you’d like that wouldn’t you?” You glared as you spoke, it was his own fault really. What sort of idiot jumpscares a witch while she’s mid-meditation? He’d frightened you so badly you accidentally blasted a ball of your signature green energy and ruined your favourite couch throw pillow. When you were ready to pounce on the scared speedster the knocks sounded again, more frantic this time.

With one last glare towards Peter you stomped towards the door. Your anger melted away completely when you saw her. Her hood was up and she looked completely exhausted, two small hooded little boys by her side.

“Wanda…” You breathed out, relief flooding your system at the sight of her alive. She didn’t get a chance to speak before your arms were pulling her against you tightly, hugging her as if your life depended on it. Wanda returned in your embrace, allowing herself to relax for the first time in nearly a year, she sniffled against your shoulder, holding back tears as she realised how much she’d truly missed you.

Billy and Tommy watched in confusion as their mother cried into your shoulder. They didn’t know who you were, all their mother had told them was that they were going somewhere safe.

It was the yell of one of the boys that caused you and Wanda to separate, “Uncle P!” With that you felt a familiar rush of air across your leg but instead of Peter appearing one of the kids was gone.

You shared a perplexed look with Wanda, although your confusion was for different reasons.

“Hey hell raisers!” Peter responded, catching the mini speedster who all but threw himself at him barely regaining his balance before the other child had flung himself into the hug.

“Wanda? Those two… are they...?” You started, at a loss for words Wanda cut you off quietly, her tone as disbelieving as yours.

“My children? Yes. Is that…?” You nodded your head numbly, anticipating the end of her question.

“Your fake brother? Yeah.” Quickly, you realised you and a wanted woman catching up with the door wide open wasn’t ideal and you ushered Wanda inside, shutting the door when she walked in.

“Hey.” Peter greeted her simply, as if he hadn’t been used as a meat puppet in her altered reality. It wasn’t in his nature to hold any grudges.

“Hi?” Wanda replied, her voice still twinged with confusion.

“Peter, will you keep an eye on the kids for a bit? Wanda and I have some catching up to do.” You asked him with a nervous laugh, just thankful that Wanda was too tired to argue with your suggestion.

Peter ruffled the boys’ hair and gave you a grin, “Only if you stop trying to kill me.”

You rolled your eyes as you began to lead Wanda into your bedroom, “You’re on probation, jerk.” You called over your shoulder.

Once you were securely in your bedroom, the door locked and sitting comfortably you fixed Wanda with an amused look, “I’d ask you what’s new but I’m not sure I even wanna know.”

Wanda gave you a sad smile while she shook her head, “No, you probably don’t. I will tell you tomorrow, I don’t want to get into it tonight. I’m so tired.” She admitted, her voice overcome with sadness.

“I’ll pump up the air mattress and you and the boys can sleep in here for however long you need. I’d offer you the spare room but that’s where Peter’s been staying and I don’t think empty food containers are the kind of decor you’d be into.” Wanda nodded, squeezing your hand gratefully.

“So his name is Peter?” She asked, curious about the man Agatha had used to trick her in WestView.

You nodded in confirmation, “Yeah. Peter Maximoff, actually.”

Wanda’s brows came to a furrow at that, “Maximoff? So he’s a relation?”

“Yes and no. Peter is from a different reality but he’s still a Maximoff and he’s got super speed. So, and this is just my theory, while you’re not directly related he could still be your brother- if you wanted him to.” You explained, as gently as you could, not trying to push her too far but to nudge the idea in her direction.

Wanda, to your surprise, didn't seem to hate the suggestion, “What is he like?”

A genuine smile made it onto your face then, as you shot into your description of your roommate, “He’s caring, funny, a little bit of a kleptomaniac but he’s working on it. He’s understanding and moronically selfless, moronic in the sense that he doesn’t even realise he’s being selfless. Huge pain in the ass too.” Wanda had a soft smile on her face by the time you’d finished.

“You like him.” Was all she said and you let out a laugh in disbelief, standing up and opening the door.

“Go grab a shower. I’ll have Peter blow up the air mattress while I go introduce myself to my god sons.”

“I thought you’d at least wait until I actually asked you.” Wanda laughed as you walked out of the room.

Things moved fairly quickly after that. As promised you introduced yourself to Billy and Tommy as their god mother, which they seemed more than thrilled about and you assumed that excitement had to do with whatever description of you Peter had given them. Wanda and the twins were all cleaned and fed and had all but collapsed into bed, foregoing the air mattress and huddling together in your double bed instead.

“Where are you sleeping, mother Teresa?” Peter teased as he noticed your eyes drooping where you stood.

“On the couch probably. Or the air mattress.” You mumbled, cutting yourself off with a yawn.

Peter, unimpressed with your options, scoffed, “No way. Come on, you can bunk with me.”

Much like Wanda, you were too tired to argue and you let Peter pull you to his, surprisingly clean, room by the hand.

You both crawled into the bed, lying close together despite the amount of empty space on the mattress.

“How are you feeling about all of this?” Your soft voice broke through the silence and Peter turned his head to look at you.

“About Wanda?” You nodded your head, watching him intently as he rolled onto his side, facing you more comfortably.

Peter shrugged lightly, “I’m feeling ok. Just glad the twins still see me as their cool uncle.” You let out a small laugh at his response.

“Wanda was asking about you. Seemed interested in getting to know the real you.” You informed him, your heartwarming as you watched a hopeful look fall across his face.

A lull settled over the room once again and Peter caught himself staring at you. His eyes drifted over every visible part of you, reminding him of most of the points on his pros list for staying in your universe; your eyes, your lashes, your nose, your lips, you.

“What’re you thinking about?” The sound of your tired voice pulled him out of his thoughts and ultimately pushed him to bite the bullet and tell you how he’s feeling. With you curled up beside him, in his bed, fighting sleep just to stay in his company for as long as you could; he knew there would be no better time.

“Just about how happy I am to be here with you.” He answered you honestly, the butterflies in both of your stomachs fluttering in sync at his words.

You trailed a hand under the duvet and onto the bedsheets between your bodies, feeling around until you found his hand and gently intertwined your fingers. “I’m happy you decided to stay.”

“What you’ve all gone through in this timeline sucks- don’t get me wrong-“ Peter started sincerely, scooting closer to you and dropping his head back down on the edge of your pillow, leaving the pair of you practically nose to nose as he went on.

“And I hate that Wanda had to go through so much… but I’m really glad that it led me to you.” Peter swore in that moment, right after the confession left his mouth, that he could die right now and be completely content knowing that you now knew how he felt.

His heart stopped, and he thought that maybe he was about to die, when you gave him the softest, sweetest smile he’d ever been on the receiving end of and whispered, “I feel the same.”

Time moved in slow motion as he felt you moving your intertwined hands towards your lips, your lips pressed gently against the back of Peter’s hand before you brought them to rest against your chest.

It was a fact to say that Peter Maximoff had never felt intimacy quite like this before. But, experiencing it now, with you, led him to wonder how he’d ever survived without it. He wasn’t sure whether it was natural to crave more, especially when the affection you were showing him was so gentle, but he didn’t care as he let the impulsive side of him take over.

Not sparing another word, Peter closed the small distance between your lips and his. His free hand cupped your jaw while yours wasted no time in getting tangled in his silver hair.

His lips moved softly and surprisingly slowly over yours and he savoured the feeling of your hand holding his while your other got lost in his hair, your body pressed up against him, the way your jaw moved against his palm as you reciprocated the movement of his lips and the taste of your lips, promising himself he’d never let the memory slip from his mind for as long as he lived.

With complete clarity, Peter could say he had felt true, genuine happiness and he had no doubt in his mind that there was absolutely nothing Charles, Hank, Scott or anyone else from his original timeline could say to make him leave this happiness behind. Because in the process of forgetting his old life, he couldn’t deny that he has undoubtedly found himself in the position of a man who had so much more to live for.

[feuer-bluete]

No no I gotta talk about the options first before I can vote okay? The Avengers is obviously the OG MCU Stevetony. The had an Dislike to Love speed run there okay? We all know that one scene with the lighting and mist right out of a romance novel. Steve smiling at Tony when Tony did not die? Priceless. But a lot of the movie is still them getting to know each other, okay, and being mean in a non fun way.

Now Age of Ultron, our behated trashshow, was still a very Stevetony thing. Bare with me here I haven't seen that movie in many years, but the way they instantly knew the bad guy is after the Vibranium. The woodchooping scene at Clint's farm? The fact that they very much shared a room there? Amazing. Perfect 10/10. Tony's worst dream involving not being able to save the team, to save Steve? Love the Angst!! Also fucking "We do this Together" "He is the Boss" "I am free tonight." I meaaaaaan damn that movie really had the Stevetony Quotes (that I am too lazy to look up)

CA:CW can go die in a dumpster. Listen to me, Comics Civil War was heartbreaking an epic because it was a real team, a found family people who had been friends and teammates for years fighting against eachother fighting for their principales, their convictions. MCU Civil War was ten guys looking ridiciouls on an airport. Plus the whole Tony vs Steve was just miscommunication as a plot and I hate that trope. (The only good thing to come out of CA:CW is that damn flip phone)

Infinity War, on the other hand, thats were the juice starts to be again, despite them not even meeting. Like first of all "We broke up." "Like a boyband?". Amazing. Show Stopping 100/10. TONY CARRING THAT DAMN FLIP PHONE WITH HIM AT ALL TIMES, had me in fucking tears. Laughing Tears but still. Steve calling Tony Earth's Best Defender? Holy shit. Plus Steve's beard. Yes thats an argument for Stevetony, sue me.

Lastly Endgame.... Endgame. Let me make clear I saw this movie only once, while I watched Infinity War like 4 times in the cinema, but Endgame. Had some real bangers okay. Lets start, with Tony coming back more or less falling in Steve's arms telling him he lost their the boy. Tony telling Steve all the things we all wanted to scream at him and HANDING HIM HIS FUCKING HEART ARC REACTOR. All of the scene were they stand together, you know the one, or when Steve comes to pick up The scene Tony slides Steve the shield on that looks so much like putting on a ring. The whole "Do you trust me?" "I do" thing. Them going back in the past together?!!! Like oh my god. Please don't even get me started on Steve falling too his knees when he sees Tony going down. And them kissing after Steve realizes Tony is not dead just really really injured and probably loosing his arm.

Okay thats a lie but a girl can dream, OKAY??

Anyway, I am no closer to making a decision now...

[unspeakable3]

WIP Challenge 😁❤🧡💛💚💙💜🤎🖤🤍❤😁🤩🤩 Rules: tell us the titles of all the WIPs you are currently working on right now and a little about them. Then tag five other writers.

thanks for the tag @ncoincidences ! the world can never have enough ghost!regulus (or regulus-lives i guess but the boy’s so much fun when he’s post-living) & i cannot wait to read yours!!

Stars Shine Darkly - canon-compliant(!) regulus fic. 25 chapters / approx 75 (help) have been posted, and i’m working on the rest. the fic that’s been in my head for the longest, and the fic that is turning out to be the most difficult to write. it hurts to hurt him. 

ATAEP pt.2 - ghost!regulus @ hogwarts during harry’s era. philosopher’s stone is up on ao3. i’ve planned out chamber of secrets (ft. a Very Embarrassing Crush for our protag) and written out bits and bobs from prisoner of azkaban (brothers black reunited!) and goblet of fire (will he see through an old schoolmate’s disguise??) but haven’t really decided on the endgame yet. so. 

is this hell? pt.3 - this is my regulus-lives au! in pt.1 kreacher took him to sirius’s flat and he was eventually convinced to tell dumbledore what he’d done. pt.2 was a wee festive interlude in which mrs potter refused to let him celebrate christmas alone. pt.3 will be regulus in hiding in the muggle world, at a muggle university, while sirius sneaks him updates about the order’s horcrux hunt. chaos will ensue!

untitled first war - a darker regulus-lives. multi pov (currently: regulus, sirius, narcissa, lucretia black) which will open with regulus escaping britain post-horcrux retrieval. will follow sirius & the order, narcissa & the death eaters, regulus’s (mis)adventures on the continent, and the decline and fall of the house of black. 

untilted ghost regulus - ghost!regulus based on a drabble i wrote a few months ago. regulus hasn’t been able to leave the cave since he died, and hasn’t had anyone but the inferii to talk to - until dumbledore + potter come to visit. 

the black sisters - the literary equivalent of a triptych: the intertwining ‘love’ stories of andromeda/ted, bellatrix/rodolphus, and narcissa/lucius, highlighting the differences in their relationships and how each sister navigates love, desire, and their parents’ expectations, against the backdrop of war.

bonus miscellaneous vague ideas for wips:

gothic horror/romance set in grimmauld place

don quixote but with gilderoy lockhart

the picture of dorian gray but make it the portrait of walburga black

brideshead revisited but they’re the sacred 28

draco is regulus reincarnated

dobby goes with voldemort to the cave instead of kreacher

a slytherin is picked to be hogwarts champion instead of cedric diggory (i saw a post about this on tumblr and i want to read it so bad!!!)

tagging @pennygalleon @billsfangearring @lou-isfake @constitutionalweasleymonarchy & anyone else who would like to take part (no pressure ofc!) 

[yoonpobs]

things change | jhs

pairing: jung hoseok x oc

genre: FLUFFFFFF, established relationship

words: 3, 377

summary: when you're an unlikely pair but it works

“Do you ever wonder what it would be like if you weren’t with her?” Yoongi slurs, his alcohol breath apparent enough for Hoseok to scrunch in his direction.

Hoseok knew, though. What he meant. Drunk Yoongi got sentimental and curious, two perceptions that were dangerous independently and possibly collateral together.

“I don’t.” Hoseok shrugs.

Because being with you was the best thing that’s happened to him and he would be a crazy man to ever put himself through the angst of imagining a world that he was Jung Hoseok without you by his side. It was cheesy and he was sure if he said it to your face you’d groan and shove him by the shoulder. But he’s always been observant and he’d be the first to see the way your eyes soften in a way that no one else can notice but him.

“I do.” Yoongi snorts.

Hoseok raises an eyebrow. “Is there something you’d like to tell me?” He’s careful with his words because Yoongi was no snitch, even if he was absolutely wasted. But Hoseok can’t say his interest isn’t piqued. Especially when he surrendered himself to the DD (designated driver) of the group.

“It’s just”—Yoongi sighs, sitting up and his drink sloshes in his cup when he places it onto the table—“I’ve said this before and you’ve probably heard this a thousand times but the two of you are so different.”

Hoseok remains silent but doesn’t do anything to give away the thoughts floating through his mind. He was half-expecting the same words to leave his friend's mouth, but having it be confirmed only makes Hoseok internalise his sighs.

“Yeah. You and every person who’s seen the two of us together.” Hoseok grunts.

“Look. I know you hate it when people point it out.” Yoongi says. “And I’m not here to tell you what you already know and on a fundamental level, we both know that the birds of a feather flock together bullshit is redundant and unrealistic. It’s just that every time I see the two of you together—it works. And it’s bewildering maybe because I can’t ever imagine _____ letting you win an argument.”

Hoseok blinks. “She doesn’t.”

Yoongi snickers, throwing the last bit of his drink down his throat before leaning back into the plush booth of the club they were at.

When Jin suggested throwing a bachelor party at one of the hottest nightclubs in Seoul, Yoongi and Hoseok almost ditched purely because the two of them had girlfriends and they didn’t really want to hear the end of the story if a stripper suddenly thought they were free game for the night.

Frankly, Yoongi’s girl was far more possessive but she was sweet. She just didn’t like it when people were actively trying to sleep with her boyfriend.

You, on the other hand, were simply unbothered. It wasn’t because you didn’t care—because you did. Hoseok knew that even if you’d roll your eyes at him when he’d joke about going to a strip club with the boys. But you weren’t insecure, and that wasn’t to say that women who were outwardly concerned were. You were just assured, and you made an effort to let Hoseok know that he needed you as much as you needed him—so anything he did wouldn’t just hurt you, but him too.

“It’s just that you’re basically the most cheerful dude I know and I don’t think I’ve seen you ever frown at anyone. Even the barista who fucked up our order four times.” Yoongi recalls. “Then there’s ____ who’s resting face literally is a big fuck you to anyone who breathes in her direction.”

Hoseok snorts, sipping his virgin cocktail. Even if he wasn’t the DD, he couldn’t do alcohol so the minty flavour of his drink was a night refresher for a tiring night (though he spent it just moping in his seat while the rest of his single friends partied away).

“I get mad too.” Hoseok shrugs.

“Yeah. Barely. Even then—you’re the most diplomatic person I know and you have a way of talking to people to get your point across without making them fear for their lives the next morning.” Yoongi deadpans.

“And sometimes diplomacy isn’t necessary.” Hoseok retorts.

Yoongi rolls his eyes. “I’m not shitting on your girlfriend. You don’t need to play social justice warrior here.”

Hoseok sighs before leaning back, mirroring the man spread Yoongi was in while he ponders his next set of words carefully.

Yoongi was probably one of the most chill people Hoseok knows, and maybe that was why they got along so well. Yoongi was a take-no-shit kind of man who was truly sensitive under all the intimidating layers he showed the world. Hoseok was just nice, but he was no pushover. It was a good balance that came out when necessary.

So Hoseok didn’t want to rub Yoongi the wrong way and tell him to stop talking about petty differences between him and you but also wanted to satiate the curiousity that lingers in his eyes.

“I know,” Hoseok says. A girl nearly topples into their booth but Hoseok spots his younger friend Taehyung grabbing her by the waist and shooting the two men a sleazy wink before he stalks off with her in his arms. Yoongi rolls his eyes but Hoseok can’t even be bothered.

“I mean,” Yoongi drawls. “Based on what you told me I know that the two of you don’t even want the same things in the future. And again—not saying there’s anything wrong with that—but didn’t you want kids for the longest time?”

Hoseok nods his head, deciding against his words.

Yoongi clicks his tongue to the roof of his mouth, nodding slowly as if he was processing Hoseok’s words.

“How did that … do you still want kids?”

“I want what _____ wants.”

Yoongi groans. “You sound like a total pushover.”

Hoseok levels a strict stare onto his friend, and even if Yoongi was older—there was something about a man who never got angry shooting him an intense stare that could make Yoongi zip his mouth.

“And kids aren’t endgame to a relationship. I love her, and yeah—I want kids. But she’s important to me and she’s here now. There isn’t a reason for me to condemn her or push her for a future that doesn’t exist yet. She’s the one carrying the baby for nine months and it’s her decision whether or not we have kids. Whether or not a kid comes along doesn’t matter to me because I’m with her because I love her and not because of a kid that isn’t real.”

Yoongi blinks. Then he huffs a breath out before letting out a low chuckle.

“Wow.”

“I know you don’t mean any harm but I don’t need to explain to anyone why _____ and I work so well together. But because you’re my best friend and you get oddly sentimental when you’re drunk I’ll spell it out for you and you better hope you’re sober enough to remember this tomorrow because I won’t repeat it again.” Hoseok says firmly.

Yoongi’s eyes widen at the serious tone Hoseok shifted to and observes the way Hoseok looks stern yet … soft, all at the same time.

“_____ is tough. In more ways than her exterior. She knows what she wants and what she’s ready for. And it was a goddamn miracle that she decided that what she wants and what she’s ready for was me. Yeah, she’s terrifying but she’s human—her heart is still pure and she’s a kind woman—person. Sure she’s systematic and needs an answer for everything but I’m her boyfriend and I’ll make sure that I can give her all the answer she needs to feel safe in this relationship. And yeah—we may not want the same things. She doesn’t want to get married but I do. But marriage isn’t endgame to me. She is. She wanted to move in together but I was iffy about it. So we live apart. That doesn’t change the nature of our love and she still loves me even if all I do is annoy her. So yeah. I’m willing to compromise and so is she. We’re different but we’re together.”

Hoseok is still calm as ever and there’s even a hint of a small smile on his face. The fact he’s smiling only testifies to the fact that you and Hoseok were so different from each other.

Yoongi is stunned to silence and sure he’s a quiet man but he usually had things to say, opinions to add. But Hoseok’s proclamation of your love only makes him sit in silence, letting the words dissipate in the atmosphere but remain in his conscience.

“Wow,” Yoongi repeats his words from earlier, but it’s all he can muster up.

Hoseok offers his friend a kind smile, sipping the rest of his drink while his friend can only stare at his nonchalant demeanour.

“And if you still don’t see it.” Hoseok grins. “There’s a reason why you don’t. I’m the only one that gets to fall in love with her like this.”

Yoongi whistles lowly before rolling his eyes. “No need to get possessive.”

“I’m a man in love. Sue me.” Hoseok shrugs with a slight smirk.

Yoongi gags at the cheesiness even if he finds himself internally grinning at his best friends blatant love for his girlfriend. He was sure it was the alcohol that was making him mushy—or perhaps Hoseok has always looked the way he did when he spoke about you. Eyes bright under dark lights and the heart-shaped smile of his becoming wider.

“If it counts for anything …” Yoongi trails off, offering a lazy smile to Hoseok. “I really hope she does marry you.”

Hoseok scoffs at Yoongi’s blatant optimism. Sure, he wanted that. He wanted nothing more than to see you in white, smiling only at him—or even with your usual stoic face—he doesn’t care. But he knew that the event itself would never change the fact that he wanted to be with you, now and forever. If fate wills, he’d marry you in a heartbeat. But Hoseok was content—and more importantly, he was in love.

“It doesn’t. But thanks.”

extra scene

“Hi, my love and my absolute sunshine.” Hoseok coos the next morning, and that’s the first thing he says when you open the door to your apartment; eyes already rolling to the back of your head.

“Did you do anything to piss me off?” You ask dryly.

Hoseok snickers, but pulls you in by your shoulders to give you a wet smooch to your lips that has you whining. You don’t push him away because you knew it was just the two of you and possibly one of your snooping neighbours.

“As you love to remind me during arguments—my existence is enough to do that, no?”

You nod your head, patting him gently on the cheek as you offer a half-hearted smile. “I’m glad you’re on the road to self-actualisation.”

Your boyfriend snorts, stepping into your apartment as he makes sure to leave his shoes on the shoe rack instead of idly laying on the floor because you were anal about things like that. And he missed you so he didn’t want you shooting him death stares just yet.

“You keep me on my feet.” Hoseok flirts, tone a little sleazy and you can’t help but sigh at your boyfriend's antics even though a hint of a smile marks your face.

When Hoseok settles into your couch, he immediately spots a wrapper that looked like it went into gift boxes—a pretty shade of green, which was his favourite colour. He immediately leans forward and eyes it with furrowed brows before looking up at you.

“My pretty baby got me a gift?” He wiggles said brows as you scoff at him, plopping into the seat next to him as you lean into his embrace.

“See for yourself.” You shrug, face still remaining blank.

Hoseok chuckles, already expecting your reaction even though everything about the placement of the wrapper to the strategic colour scheme of it screamed a gift for Hoseok. He knew you still got flustered when you did nice things for him, even if he’d argue that was on a daily basis because you were just a loud lover in a way that let your actions speak for your affection.

He wants to coddle you further, snuggle you so hard that you’d whine and attempt to shove him away until you decide that you secretly love it and hold him tight. He was so in love. But he placates the shift of your knee in a way he knew was due to your patience wearing thin.

So, he picks up the wrapper and realised that it was much lighter than he’d expected; and lacked the density of a usual present. It almost seemed like you were pulling a prank on him for no apparent reason. But Hoseok trusted you and knew that you weren’t the type to pull shit like that because you just had better things to do.

He unravels each crevice, eyes still searching for the gift that somehow never comes—all until he finally settles on a stick that he vaguely recognises from pharmacies that he never thought would be in his hands, staring up at him with two straight lines.

The silence is loud, but Hoseok is stunned. His mouth falls agape as he cradles the pregnancy test in his palm, eyes not bothering to look at your nervous expression. One that rarely comes from you just because you were an assured person in general and seldom needed validation from others.

But you loved Hoseok and you knew deep down that he’d always have an effect on you, words or actions—presence or not.

“Hobi?” You call softly, voice nervous as you fiddle with the hem of his shirt as he blankly stares at the test.

You’re terrified you made a mistake—or if he’s changed his mind because of your pessimism on the idea of having children. Sometimes you wonder how Hoseok could love you, all edges and harsh lines when you spoke. A woman who was either black and white or purely a grey area. Hoseok was the rainbow on dark days and brightened any environment.

You can’t read Hoseok’s face, and it scares you. Because you usually can since he was an open book. So when he finally turns to you, and you finally get a proper glimpse of his expression—

First, you see tears.

“I-Is this …?” He chokes.

Your eyes widen, immediately reaching out to cradle his cheeks as an involuntary reaction.

“Why are you crying?” You feel yourself tearing up and you try to suppress it. There was something about you being so connected to Hoseok and his feelings that made everything he felt translate to your own conscience.

“Y-You—I-I—you’re pregnant?” He whispers, eyes returning to the stick.

You nod your head slowly. “I am.”

Hoseok nibbles on his lips and you wait patiently for his next response. You can more or less guess that he’s happy yet confused, the conversation of potentially having kids never really showing any progress. But he’s been patient and so loving—and you thought you’d never shake but here you were.

The next thing you know, Hoseok is wrapping his arms around you so tightly that it hurts as you try to gasp for air. He nuzzles his face into the crook of your neck in a way that makes all your edges turn round, and your heart melt from the stone wall it was into a flurry of emotions that only he can bring out of you.

“We’re going to have a baby?” He asks softly, pulling away to clasp his palms around your cheeks, forcing you to look at him.

“We are.” You reply, equally as soft; eyes and tone. “You’re going to be a father, Hobi.”

And somehow, that breaks him. He can’t stop the tears nor can you. So you allow him to cry, and you allow yourself to feel too; holding each other close as you feel his hand reach out for your stomach. And you can’t deny the butterflies that erupt.

When he manages to regain his composure, wiping at his eyes; he looks at you so earnestly and gives you a wide smile that drew you in from the moment you met, and grown to love.

“You really want this?” He asks, eyes concerned but tone irrevocably gentle. You knew he wasn’t doubting your choices, but respecting them.

You nod your head.

“For the longest time … I thought kids weren’t for me. That I wouldn’t be a good mother because of how I am.” You tell him, and you see Hoseok’s eyebrows furrow and you know he’s thinking about denying that. But Hoseok has never been the type to interrupt you while talking. “And maybe I won’t be, maybe I will. But having you here with me just reassures me to know that our baby will have the greatest, most loving and most patient father out there.”

Hoseok’s eyes soften, knowing how big of a decision this must’ve been for you.

“I love you.” He whispers when he leans in to give you a slow kiss on your lips, one that wasn’t leading anywhere but was nice enough to feel the emotions pouring through.

You don’t say it back, but you look at him with gentle eyes that only he can recognise—and he knows. He knows your heart like you know his.

“You’ve compromised a lot of things for me, and I know I’m particular about many things. I have a plan ten years down the road of where I’d like to be in my life—and I never thought I’d be planning with a kid in mind.” You chuckle softly, and Hoseok pulls you closer so that you’re resting your head against his chest. “But you make me want to do things I’ve never done. And I really—I really want this baby. I want him or her to grow up thinking about how badass their parents were even though their mom is a total bitch and their dad is the mediator of the family.”

Hoseok snorts, brushing his hands through your hair.

“How long?” He asks.

You grin against his t-shirt, not looking up when you fiddle with the fabric of it.

“I’ve been feeling symptoms for a month now, and the test was from a week ago. I went to the doctor to be sure because I knew from the moment I suspected it that I wanted it to be true, for you, for me—for us.”

Hoseok tilts your chin up, offering you the smile you love so much and you feel so … happy.

“Next thing you know I’ll have you walking down the aisle.” Hoseok sighs, happy and content.

You roll your eyes, narrowing it at him as you push on his chest to sit up.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself, Jung.”

Hoseok wraps his hand around the back of your neck before pulling you close to meet your lips again.

“Let a man dream.” He grins against the kiss.

He can feel your giggle and the way you do the thing that you do when you’re secretly ruffled but adore him way too much to pull away.

“You know this means we have to move in together, right?” You murmur against his lips.

Hoseok snorts. “Duh. But you know you already have a home in my heart, right?”

You expected it, but it doesn’t make it any less cheesy when you groan and shove at his chest. Hoseok cackles, fully loving the way you scrunch your eyebrows in distaste at him.

“I hate you.” You scowl.

“No, you don’t.” Hoseok sings, resting his head against your shoulder while he looks up at you with innocent eyes.

You’re happy, and so is he.

And a few months down the road, Hoseok drops a ring into your palm, no words or expectations. You roll your eyes, as usual; but you slip it onto your ring-ringer anyways.

[xo-alie-xo]

PORTWELL LONG GAME OR RINA SLOWBURN.

You can only choose one poison.🍷

Listen up my Wildcats.🐱

We all ship each character with happiness. No matter how much you love to hate them, a majority of us simply adores the characters and want the best for them. Then comes relationships and it's okay to ship our favorites.⛴

I'm a diehard Rina shipper and I know in my heart that they are series endgame. The set up, the natural chemistry, their mutual understanding, the surprises and angst literally put me on chokehold. So I'm 100% a Rina shipper till the end. I'm here for the slowburn and their development rather than one shots. They are worth the pain. 😭❤

Let me start with Ricky Bowen now.

Ricky shouldn't to be with Gina because he's hurting her mentality. He's not insensitive on purpose. Like when he tried to stop Big Red from telling her his message to Nina because he KNOWS it'll hurt her.

If you think, that Ricky didn't understand clearly when Gina confessed, think again. He shushed her. Kept their thing a secret from everyone. He knows he feels some type of way and she feels something too. But this boy is so used to safeguarding his childhood norms and has very little adaptability. Hence, he pretended to ignore everything between them because his home stability was falling apart and he clinged on to Nina, his constant childhood love.

He's a traumatised 16-17 year old boy that needs to heal and grow. This episode was heartbreaking because he had to accept that he had to let Nina go because their once upon a time fairytale had become toxic.

People change. I'm not the same person I was when I was 16 lmao. Being together as childhood lovers means growing together and accepting each other's growth. Which Ricky couldn't. He clutched to the idea of Nini. Even his love confession. It was sooo sweet but all he did was focus on their history.

This boy needs time to heal and maybe seek professional therapy. It would be so DAMN HISTORIC if Disney decides to take psychological issues seriously and show how he's dealing with his anxiety, pills and psychotherapy. He needs to breathe before he can be with any girl for that matter. He's hurting and isn't trying to hurt anyone on purpose. Including Gina.

Him asking her for advice on Nini was a dumb, insensitive move. But he's trying to find a way to build some supportive friendship that they shared in early season one.

As for now, this boy needs to get his own grip on life and heal.

As for our Queen Gina

In Gina's confession, she focuses on their future. She basically said, "I wouldn't quit on a possible future of us being together despite obstacles. Because I never quit. But moving away isn't in my control." Ricky deep down knows this, encouraged her to say it, teary eyed, despite right after getting back together with Nini. Gina is his future. She went to his new house. And I also have this feeling that when she was given a chance to stay, she stayed partly because of Ricky. She left a chance to be with her mom because she prioritised their relationship. Because she never quits. 💪🏼

But she came back and found out Ricky has gotten back together with Nini.😭 What she doesn't know is Ricky got together with Nina before her confession, and after Gina kept dodging his messages. She's hurt and questions why she returned because she isn't particularly close to anyone. Hence, she was so silent at the after party. She thinks it'll be fine, "she'll live", and finds other reasons to find permanence. Her arc this season has been settling down in East High, despite the pain of losing and being 'betrayed' by Ricky, she finds other reasons to stay. 🏡

This kind of contrasts her with Nina. Nina left her dream school and came to Salt Lake because she missed her established home, and not just because of Ricky. Nina returned and was loved and embraced by Ricky Bowen.💕 Gina came back to a semi new place called Salt Lake because of her promise of a future to Ricky. But she got stabbed and she bled. 💔🗡

Think about her situation. She feels confused, alone, heartbroken, out of place and seperated from her mom. She's broken and hurting too. And she doesn't need more from Ricky's accidental or intentional 'sick burns'. That's the one line where he was such a jerk and I can't defend him here. 😠

Here comes the Caswells.

Her second family. A place of healthy stability. A home that accepted her. Ashlyn, her roomie and her confidante. EJ, the misunderstood boy who saw her value and bought her plane ticket.

Let's get to EJ.

At first, I wasn't too keen on seeing Portwell's development. But then that video chat where they talk about the possibility of her staying and him convincing her. Had me sold for a solid brother-sister relationship. Few episodes later, when Gina's pain seemed to be oblivious to everyone, he was the only one who asked her how she was, and saw her glow. The comfort she must've felt.

Not that she needs a man's validation, but she must be feeling like a second choice and feeling a little insecure because of Ricky. But EJ lifts her up and I genuinely saw her smile. This boy has her back whenever. The man she can lean on and truly sees how special she is. She no longer feels alone now that she has his entire fam and other friends. She genuinely feels a place of belonging and happiness when she's the apple of his eye. Notice how happy she is? How happy this boy is? She's going through her own issues and she has found ground with EJ.

I was very doubtful when they started hinting at a romantic direction. Because EJ would be used as plot device again for a girl to get to Ricky.😤 This man doesn't deserve to be second best to anyone, just like Gina.😑 That's why I'm still hesitant on shipping them at least temporarily. EJ needs to be something even more special to Gina. They need to show each other how special and treasured they are to each other despite feeling like rejects. They are each other's source of comfort.

I'm sure they can keep EJ at East High for the next season. Whether it's the drama club, or the AV club or going to a local college. So he will be there for Gina. I don't know how they can work out a relationship with much distance as Rini's fell out when she moved away. So, if EJ leaves again, it'll again shake up Gina. Her being worried whether he'll date college girls, second thoughts, etc. I don't want them to go through that. And if they do move on to romantic Portwell, make sure it's not plot device for Rina. So you can either have Portwell endgame or Rina Endgame.

Basically I want Gina to be treated so right that she understands she doesn't need Ricky. And when he does ask her out, and he makes her feel like a second choice or a rebound, she says NO. Because EJ has helped regain her self assurance. Eventually I want Gina to confide in EJ about her and Ricky. EJ is jealous but also angry about how Ricky has been hurting her. And becomes damn protective of his 'babe'. Ricky gets jealous of their relationship, restarting Ricky and EJ's old rivalry. But this time, it's not because Gina is his girlfriend, but because she's EJ's best friend who he has a crush on and wants what's best for her.

If it's meant to be Rina endgame

EJ- RICKY, YOU IDIOT! You have no clue how to treat her right. You don't put her first. You mislead her. Get the hell away from her! She's too powerful and beautiful, she doesn't deserve your scraps. I know how she feels for you. I wish I were you. I would treat her like a queen. I don't mind even waiting years till she's ready. She deserves that. You're so lucky you have even a small chance that I may never have. So get your act together, prove you're worth it to win her over. All I want is for her to be happy. Even if it's with someone else. And maybe then I'll stop threatening you to stay away from her.😠

Ricky- .....I don't know what I'm more scared of. Change, or losing the girl I fell for or YOU. Okay, losing her but you're a close second.😬

If it's Portwell endgame.

Ricky- I messed up. Make sure you don't mess up with her. You'll regret it forever.

EJ- I'd rather get hit by thousand basketballs than ever hurt her. I'll be her plus one and her best friend until she's ready to be with me. I know she's ready now too. But I want her to know I'm willing to wait till she graduates before we make it official. I'm in it for the long game.

As for their age gap. I'm 100% sure Portwell won't kiss this season. If they do, it'll be next when Sofia turns 18. They are professional actors who are cast because they are the perfect fit for the role and are expected to carry out the storyline. But I suppose fearing some outbursts, they might delay Sofia kissing anyone till next season. It's so weird because Olivia was maybe 17 when Matt was 21-22 when they kissed in season one. But no one had a problem with that. But for this, they do. Remember, they are professional actors. They are acting! Sometimes, actors are over 10 years apart (but above 18) and act as romantic partners.

As for their characters, they are only two years apart. That's hardly any difference once you're over the age of 18. Age of consent is 16. But adults above 18 are only allowed to have sex with adults above 18. So, age isn't a problem here because EJ is a gentleman and is genuinely interested in her and isn't trying to get in her pants. So age isn't the issue when it comes to dating. It's the maturity. Gina is very mature and gives very sound advice. But I can see EJ being patient enough till she turns 18 just to kiss her because he loves her. 😚

As for the Ashlyn remark, "You look like a kid to me rn". He was JOKING.😂 Don't take things out of context. I tell my cousin sister that all the time. But she's three years younger than me and a grown adult. I don't see her as a kid but it's just a cousin teasing her younger cousin that's she's a little immature. I'm Matt's age and I'm very mature for my age and since I was a teenager, I always matched up with boys a little older than me. Now that I'm in my early 20s, I've dated boys even close to 30. So age is just a number.

EJ dating Gina and giving her quick kisses is fine. But to have a strong sexual element in their relationship (including making out), he'll have to wait till she's 18+. And I'm sure for that he'll wait till she's ready even past her early 20s. Age is really just a number and we can't help who we fall in love with. Trust me, I've been there.😂 So I can see EJ feeling conflicted about his feelings that are clear at this point.

They might not be a perfect fit, but they make each other sooo happy. They deserve a lot more than a short lived fling.😟 They are either endgame or Rina is. You can't have both as a Rina unless you're an EJ hater who wants him to exist as plot device. Nope! He's sooo much more precious than that.

But Jack on the other hand....I'm okay if he's the one to make Ricky or EJ jealous. Because he's just been introduced and it's okay if a character is used, but only once, for someone else to realize their feelings. 💁🏽‍♀️

In short.

Ricky needs help and needs to be on his own. No girlfriends allowed.🙅🏽‍♀️🚫

Needs to give both Gina and Nina space for them to grow on their own too.🌳

Ricky needs to understand the core of his problems and become more adaptable via therapy. Maybe the psychologist will point out his unresolved feelings for Gina, or he will conclude it himself. And in comes Ricky-pining-for-Gina season three.

Ricky needs to fully get over Nina before he moves on to anyone. Same for Gina if Portwell were to happen. No one deserves to be second choice.

Gina isn't Ricky's cushion. She's a living person with strong feelings for him and shouldn't be subjected to share his pain. She already struggles with her own issues.

Ricky needs to stay single till he wins back Gina and prove he's worth it. He needs to show even if another girl wants him, he'll never quit on Gina ever again. Even if he has to watch her be with someone else. *cough parallels*.

It's either romantic Rina then Portwell endgame OR Portwell flirty besties but Rina endgame. You and I can choose only one because my boy EJ shouldn't be used as plot device for a girl to leave for Ricky ever again.

Portwell's age difference can be practically solved and isn't much of an issue unless they get hot and heavy before Gina turns 18 which is impossible considering this is Disney. 🤣🤣

Jack and Gina will be plot device material and purely so sentimental to us OG Andi Mack fans. More than any ship, this is what I'm looking for. Sort of an Andi Mack crack ship for season 3a. It's gonna be soooo funny. 😍😂

I respect everyone's ship. I see what you're seeing. And I'm not going to invalidate your ship. But unless it's done right, I won't jump from the Rina ship. I liked Rini. I like Portwell. I like AU Juffy crackship haha.😂 But as for me, I'm still holding on to Rina slowburn.

Preparing myself for the pain. 😭🔥

(But if I had to pair two characters without Disney getting in the way, it would be Gini. The power duo. Undeniable chemistry. They can be written so well because of their layered relationship and contrasting personalities.🤩 The classic rivals to friends to lovers. But that's a talk for another day lmao.)

Thanks for reading my opinion, Wildcat!🐱❤