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orv-random-quotes · 2 months ago

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hey guys i made an analysis of the parallel between pinocchio-p's new song "With or Without Me" and yoo joonghyuk because i literally could not stop thinking about it after my first listen

it's under the cut as it's quite long

also warning for heavy spoilers. i kinda forgot what i mentioned but it probably might be good to avoid if you haven't read the whole novel and don't want to be spoiled.

“My timid self, hiding in an ant's nest

Quietly waits for the misfortune to pass”

this is like how 0!yjh felt, standing in shock from the first scenario

“Gradually and gradually, my heart becomes dull

Gradually and gradually, my heart becomes dull”

as he continues to go through the regressions, witnessing his comrades’ deaths hundreds of times, he gets more apathetic. this is best shown by the 41st regression, where all he manages to say about lee jihye’s and lee hyunsung’s deaths are “In the future, sea battles will be a bit difficult,” and “I lost a good shield today,” respectively. it is not because he no longer cares for them that he says these hurtful words, but rather, that he cared for them too much. he cared for them too much and now his heart is hardened to protect him from attaching to his comrades repeatedly because he knows they’ll just end up dying.

“It feels like there's nothing I can do to change this world”

no matter how much he tries, he always ends up failing and coming short of ■■. he can’t do anything to change these outcomes, he can’t escape from the scenarios, he can’t stop the endless cycle of suffering.

“They point a gun at my head and test my allegiance”

“they” is anna croft. this sentence describes the 46th scenario in the 2nd regression, where anna croft betrayed yjh and forced him to become her servant, almost like pointing a gun at his head and forcing him to show his loyalty.

“Gradually and gradually, my heart rots

Gradually and gradually, my heart rots”

same like before. the horrible memories pile up one after the other into an insurmountable pile of trauma, the <Hellscape of Eternity>. the regression depression gets worse and worse.

“If I'm like this, nothing will ever come true

If I'm like this, I'll never be loved by you”

if he’s in this state, he’s never going to reach ■■. you can also connect this to KDJ and YJH’s discussion on the rooftop, where KDJ says this may be the last round you may be able to experience the conclusion “as a human being”.

“Shut up, I'm gonna live even if I'm a wimp

I'm invisible, but there's something I can do, right?”

even if he’s hopeless (or, like a sunfish, in kim dokja’s words), he feels determined to keep going. he must be the one to bear this eternity. him and him alone. he must be able to do something, right?

“The world spins hatefully and indifferently

Even with or without me”

the world continues to go on, filled with destruction and sadness and ignorance, particularly instigated by the constellations. it will continue to go on like this, as it has never changed throughout any of his regressions. but, it still goes on without him. he finds out later on that his comrades continue to live on after he regresses. only he goes back, and the others move forward. everything will continue whether he exists in that worldline or not.

“I wish for a shooting star to the endless fighting

I wish for a ray of happiness to those who are kind”

i like to think that even though he is filled with only rage and disappointment for humans, constellations, and the whole world, that he still thinks this, at least in the early rounds.

“This merciless tragicomedy continues

Even with or without me - still”

“this merciless tragicomedy” references how this world is basically a show made by the constellations for their entertainment. their pain and tragedy and laughter only exists to fill the stomachs of constellations who don’t consider them worthy of respect.

"I have to do something - still

I have to do something - still"

he still feels the need to do something. fight the constellations, avenge his comrades, sacrifice everything he has to repay for his sins, reach ■■, he has to do something.

"The medal I dedicated my youth to win

Was taken away from me in two or three seconds

Crushed by the crowd of countless heroes"

the progress he makes in the several years each round can last can be immediately taken away by someone like Asmodeus, and the hundreds of constellations watching YJH would watch, captivated, egging the villain on as YJH watches his progress, his life being taken away yet again. he has to start all over.

"I eventually turn into a shellfish"

‘shellfish’ being sunfish. thank you kim dokja.

“Gradually and gradually, my heart dies

Gradually and gradually, my heart dies

It feels like it doesn't matter whether I'm here or not”

he begins to feel useless as the rounds continue to progress, as he knows the worlds will continue to exist without him. it doesn’t matter if he’s there, right? he’s only one person in the hundreds of thousands that experience the wrath of the scenarios.

“Dreams and frauds have the same face”

the people that could help him end up betraying him. anna croft, shin yoosoung, even his comrades when they become outer gods.

"Those who believe will all be saved

I, who can't believe, will not be saved?"

he’s still holding onto this belief that he can destroy the <Star Stream> and everything inside it by reaching ■■. but, he’s losing it as he continues to fail hundreds of times. he’s losing his belief in everything. in himself, in his comrades, in his ability to go on, in the constellations, in the stories…

“Who cares, my heart's still beating

How many years have I continued losing this fixed game?”

how many times has he regressed only to come back to the same subway? the same origin, the same story, the same scenarios, the same possibilities, just to go through it all again?

“After I've died, the sun will yet rise

Even with or without me - still

I have to do something - still

Even if I'm hated by myself”

even after he regresses, those worlds he left behind will continue to go on. he has to end the cycle, he has to reach ■■, even while battling the deeply rooted self-hatred and regression depression that lives inside him.

“Gradually and gradually, life begins to shine

Gradually and gradually, life begins to shine

Twinkling and twinkling, life begins to shine

“This nightmare will end”, I cling to a fantasy

Even if it's all meaningless”

and in the 1864th round, he meets someone. kim dokja. kim dokja who promises that he can take YJH to the end of the scenarios, kim dokja who tells him never to give up on this round, kim dokja who says this round will definitely be the last, kim dokja who makes him feel like life is worth living.

"Shut up, I'm gonna live even if I'm a wimp

I'm invisible, but there's something I can do, right?"

he has to continue to battle those memories, that voice in his head persuading him to give up. he has to tell himself to go on, to remind himself of kim dokja’s words at every step. he’s only one out of millions of people living through the hell of the scenarios, but he’s the only one who carries this <Hellscape of Eternity>, this curse, so he has to be able to do something.

"I wish for a shooting star to the endless fighting

I wish, please, for all the happiness to those who are kind

Even if I know it won't come true

Even if the world has already ended"

he knows this world is too cruel to offer kind people salvation. the world has ended, chaos has begun its terrifying reign, and morality and justice have no place here. those who are good will fall, and those who are evil will rise to the top. even the constellations of “absolute good” have committed atrocities beyond imagination. he knows the conflict and fighting will never stop, they can never stop because of the will of <Star Stream> which is constantly looking for a new story to devour. his views of good and evil are completely destroyed as he continues to live through hundreds of variations of hell, and the ones he thought were good turn out to be horrible, and vice versa. however, when he joins kimcom, he wants a happy ending for them. he does love them, so much more than he lets on, and he just wants them all to be happy, even though it can never happen.

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emiefluff · 11 months ago

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•┈••✦ What We Love About You!✦••┈•

┏━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━┓

Fandom- Project Sekai / HATSUNE MIKU: COLORFUL STAGE!

Characters- Rui Kamishiro, Tsukasa Tenma, Emu Otori, Lee!Nene Kusanagi

Ships- Polysho

Summary- Nene comes to the Wonderland SEKAI upset, prompting her beloved partners to attempt a "cheer up operation"

A/N- Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! I decided to collaborate with Py (@pink-tk-a-latte) On this little silly goofy fic! I think this actually took us like 5 days LMAO | But it was worth it!!!!111 (it's partially proofread by me and py so)

Tags- @ziniszombie @pink-tk-a-latte @justaposibblytransgirl @nekoma-not-lee

Fic Under The Cut!

┗━•❃°•°❀°•°❃•━┛

It was Valentine's Day, a day of love, appreciation, and happiness. Everyone at Kamiyama High School in Class 2-A was tasked with writing a letter to who they loved and appreciated the most, and what they loved or liked about them.

As they were promptly shared with the class, everybody was waiting patiently for their name to be said by the other students. This also included Nene, who had been waiting the entire class to hear her name. Despite her kindness towards the other students, her name was not called by anybody.

Nene listened to the pleasantly embarrassed laughs and appreciative coos from the recipients. They hid their faces in their hands, smiled wobbly smiles, and put their hands on their hearts with tearful faces.

Nene awaited her turn for the burst of surprise, giddiness, gratitude at hearing her name from someone else’s mouth. It never came.

Maybe she shouldn’t have expected anything. She was kind, sure, but she was no one’s best friend. She shouldn’t mind. She understood. Maybe she didn’t want that extra attention anyway.

Still, in her lonely desk in the corner, Nene felt her heart sag.

After the bell rang to mark the end of class, Nene was nowhere to be seen. She had run out of school at the end of the day, not caring who saw her as she waited until the right moment alone to enter the Wonderland SEKAI.

Miku and KAITO, who had been working together on a show idea for Tsukasa and the others, noticed Nene enter. Something, however, was off about the grayish-green haired girl. The two vocaloids realized that Nene wasn't feeling her best, but before they could ask about it, she'd run off to hide.

Nene didn’t know how long she’d spent curled up backstage of the theatre, before she heard a bright and bubbly but concerned voice through the curtain.

“Nene-chan? Nene-chan, please come out!”

Slowly, she peeled her head from the wall.

“NENE! WHERE ARE YOU HIDING!”

Ah, and that earth-quaking volume…

“Perhaps she’s behind the stage?”

And the most familiar voice of all.

Wiping her eyes with her sleeve, Nene called pitifully, “I’m here…”

Her sore eyes beheld a ball of pink bouncing into the lightless hollow. She gasped and was at Nene’s side in a flash.

“Nene! What’s wrong? My sadness senses were tingling, and then Miku went ‘Brrrrrrrllllll— brrrrrrrlllll—’ which meant someone was lost in Sekai!!” Emu threw herself around Nene, who could only hiccup in protest.

Nene felt so bad about burdening the others with her bad mood, but nothing could really come out. Finally, in tears, she'd speak in a quavering tone, her voice breaking and cracking. "S-Sorry....I-I'm sorry...I-I didn't mean to w-worry anybody...I-I just..."

"Nene-chan..." Emu held her tightly, rubbing her weeping partner's back gently as she let Nene express her current emotions to the three of them. Nene would sniffle, squeezing her eyes shut when she felt Rui gently stroke her hair with his fingers.

“Nene,” Rui called lowly, voice soothing and gentle as milk. At that one word, a dam broke within Nene’s chest.

Sobbing, Nene buried her face in Emu’s pink sweater. “It’s really not that big of a deal. I-I think… I’m just being dramatic.”

“Nonsense!” Tsukasa, who had been quietly panicking as soon as he saw her crying, nestled into her other side. His star-like warmth was like a plush, constellation-patterned blanket. “You’re never dramatic! Even I would be upset if no one thought of writing for me.”

“You can be honest with us, Nene.” Rui pulled his fingers through her hair again, a massaging tug on her scalp. Emu rubbed her cheek against her head.

Nene let Tsukasa pull her legs into his lap. “Maybe there’s just nothing to say about me… Nothing to-” Nene swallowed. She didn’t want to voice her thoughts, but she’d promised to be honest. “Nothing to love…”

Nene buried her face into Emu's shoulder once more out of shame, scared of what her partners would think. To her surprise, however, they showed her nothing but absolute kindness, Emu leaning her head slightly to kiss Nene's cheeks, Tsukasa rubbing her back, and Rui knelt down to hold her hand and massage her shoulders.

"Nene, you don't have to deal with this alone, y'know that, right?" Rui would ask softly, his fingertips gently tapping and drumming on her shoulders. "Yeah, Nene-chan! You know that whoever said that there wasn't anything to love or write about you is wrong, right? They're just jealous of you!" Emu pouted softly as she planted many tiny kisses all over Nene's forehead, nose, and cheeks.

Nene would reluctantly nod to their questions, still feeling down in the dumps about today. She didn't know what to do in order to feel better, so she'd just listen to her partners soothe her hurting pains, and comfort her.

Rui hummed, sensing that Nene still didn’t quite believe them. “There’s plenty of things to love about you, that we love about you.” Rui leaned over to nuzzle into her cheek.

His feather-like breaths and kisses pushed Nene to squirm away and giggle. As she shoved at Rui’s head, he chuckled.

“For example, your cute little laugh.” Rui grinned like a cat. “And your peculiarly ticklish cheeks.”

“Ruhuhuhihi!” Nene whined, finding refuge in Emu’s shoulder. “Stahahap, you meheheanie!”

“I didn’t know your cheeks were ticklish!” Emu’s eyes sparkled in a truly terrifying way. “I’m gonna getcha~! Let’s see that smile we love-love-love so much!”

Emu peppered noisy smooches all over Nene’s skin, even blowing a small raspberry on her blushing cheeks. Nene squealed and ducked away. “AhaEHEmuhuhu!”

“Oho? You didn’t know, Emu?” Rui raised an amused brow. “It’s her deepest, darkest secret. Oops!”

“RuihiHIHIhiiii! You traHAhaitor!” Nene managed to land a considerable slap on Rui’s face, and he gasped in offense.

Rui sniffled performatively. “Nene! My dearest friend, how could you?”

“Ah! I see my inventive partners have come up with an answer to our sad Nene plight.” announced Tsukasa, who noticed the drying tears on Nene’s well-kissed cheeks. “Look at that radiant smile! A wonderful muse!”

"Nohohohoo i-it's nohohohohohot!" Nene giggled nervously, covering her face in embarrassment as she tried to move away from her partners. This caused Emu to persist and continue her tickly antics, her fingers gently stroking Nene's cheek in a tingly way.

"Awwweeee~ Nene-chan is so cuteee, it's so wonderhoy~!" Emu exclaimed happily, continuing to stroke Nene's cheeks. The grayish-green haired girl would finally manage to turn away completely, hiding her face with her hands.

“Well, we can’t allow that!” Tsukasa took advantage of Nene’s legs in his lap and skittered his nails over her knees. Nene shrieked and jumped but couldn’t escape his hold. Cheering, Emu bound Nene in a hug and squeezed her like a balloon.

“EHEHEMUhuhu! I caHAHA- TsuKAHASA!”

“You’re so fluffy-fluffy toasty-toasty, Neneeee, I just wanna squeesh you forever!” With exuberance, Emu kneaded Nene’s sides, watching her squirm back and forth and try to kick her legs.

“LEHEhehet mehehe goho! You dAHAdohorks!”

Rui muffled a snicker and teased at the back of Nene’s neck; now she was twisting every which way like a faulty folding chair.

Rui simpered. “Go for her iliac crest!”

“Her what?”

"What's an eye-lii-ack crest?" Mused Emu, who was very curious to know what Rui was talking about. Nene knew exactly where this was going as she flailed her arms about in protest. She'd have no choice but to squeak and hiccup as she spoke through giggle-induced words.

"Nohoho-No! R-Ruhuhuhuhuii! D-Don't tehehell thehehehemmm!"

Tsukasa and Emu couldn't help but wonder what was about to happen, both of them listening intently to Rui. They'd wait for an explanation, curious what has Nene giggling so nervously.

Rui shrugged and decided that showing was better than telling. Slowly, his hands descended, curling into claws, as Nene hugged her knees as close as she could to her chest in defense.

“Dohon’t- Rui! D-Don’t! NohoHOHAHA!”

Rui’s thumbs massaged the top of Nene’s hip. She exploded from her ball and grabbed onto the nearest thing — Tsukasa — to stabilize herself against the ticklish shocks traversing her nerves.

“You remembered what it was, Nene! Such a clever pupil. Isn’t she amazing?” Rui sounded tearfully proud. Desperately, Nene shook her head.

“YOUHUHAHAHA nahaHEHERD! RuhuhuHIHIHI!”

With Rui gently but cruelly digging into one of her worst spots, Tsukasa boldly drawing on and under her knees, and Emu pinching sporadically around her middle, Nene’s face began to ache from how wide she was laughing. Her stomach pretzeled, warm from the giddiness of love and fluster.

"Guysss! We should go over more things we love about Nene-chan! I'll start! I love how red your cheeks and nose get! I love how you hide your cute little smile~! Who's next!

"I also love how softspoken you are when you tease, it's so unexpected to me, but I love those moments nonetheless." Tsukasa would chirp in, gently squeezing her calves every now and then. "And as for me, I love it when you giggle so hard that your nose scrunches up and you end up snorting, and I especially love how cute and tiny your dimples are. Such an adorable sight, is it not~?"

"NohoHOHOHOAhahaha! N-NOHOHOHOhohohot adohohoHOHOHOHORAblehehehehe! IHIHIHIhihit tihihiHIHIHI- NAHAhahahahahahaha!" Nene couldn't finish her words out of embarrassment. She hated saying that she was ticklish. But, unfortunately for her, Rui caught onto this, and teased lovingly out loud to catch Nene off guard.

"Oh? It what, Nene? What are you trying to say? What t-word are you referring to?"

Nene completely combusted, trying to prevent this from happening. "NOHOHOHohohoho! D-DohohohoHOHOHON'T YOHOHOHOUHUhuhuhu dahahaHEHEHEHEARE STAHAhahahart thihihihis!"

"Are you saying touchy~? Or teasy~? Or even tastyyyy~?" Rui grinned widely, knowing exactly what his ass was doing. He was trying to trick Nene, and it was clear that Emu and Tsukasa were both in on this.

"DUHUHUhuhumbahahAHAHAHASS! IHIHIHIhihit tihihiHIHIHIHICKLES!"

Nene immediately tried to cover her mouth, realizing what she had gotten herself into. "W-WahahahaHAHAIHIHIHIT NOHOHOhohoho! DohohoHOHOAHAHAHAN'T!"

“Ticklish, you say~?” Rui’s grin was chilling. “Is that so? Well well well… isn’t that just prrrrecious?”

Suddenly, all the tickling stopped. Nene could only feel the phantom tingles of what had just passed and the force of her lungs heaving in air. But she couldn’t trust it. She knew what was about to happen.

Sweet breath fluttered over her ear. “Aww, you should have told us, Nene~,” Emu whispered. Nene muffled a squeak. Rarely was Emu a menacing presence, but this time, Nene’s heart only pounded in dread.

A finger brushed a slick strand of hair behind her other ear. Nene shivered. “She seems nervous. Isn’t the suspense just killing you?” She never thought she’d fear Tsukasa’s quiet voice.

Someone else was pulling her in. Something warm teased at her neck.

“Doho- don’t. Guys! Plehease! Nonono—“

Shrilling in ticklish laughter, Nene wriggled about to try and get away as Rui planted tickly kisses all over her neck. Giggling along, Emu would scribble her nimble fingers under Nene's armpits as the light tickles got to the poor girl.

All Nene could get out was an "EhehehEHEHEEK! NOHOHOHohohoho!" as she squirmed and flailed about. She was so ticklish, but would never admit to it.

Nene squealed, thrashed, blushed, cried for mercy, and slapped aggressively at Rui’s shoulder and elbowed Emu as best she could.

“WaHAhaHAHAIT NAhaHAT ThEEEEREheHAHA! NoooohOOOOO!”

The sounds of Rui’s lips trembled up to her ear in waves and she crushed Emu’s fingers beneath her upper arm. Tears washed over her eyes and her laughter became so screechy that even Tsukasa was concerned.

He rested his chin and a kiss on Emu’s shoulder and pinched Rui’s cheek. Both of them received the memo and slowed their attack. Rui smoothed the sides of Nene’s shirt. Emu fixed her hair and moved aside to let Nene fall into Tsukasa’s lap. Nene hiccuped on a breath and covered her face, giggles interspersed.

“I’m sorry… to get so sappy on you guys,” Nene slurred.

Smiling, Rui purred, “Nene, we love you when you’re happy. We love you when you’re sad too.” He coaxed her hands away to reveal her pink nose and pursed lips.

Tsukasa cupped her face with a grin that was difficult to take seriously, but cute. “Yes! Your crying face is charming!”

“But when you smile, you’re even more charming! Cuz we know you’re happy.” Emu’s chipper face popped in from the side of her vision.

“Forget it. You guys are sappier than the ending theme of a video game.” And together, they laughed.

༝ ˚ ｡⋆ 𓇼 ⋆｡ ˚ ༝

A face hidden in her hands, a tearful face, a burst of surprise, giddiness, gratitude.

But mostly embarrassment.

#no smexual stuff pls >:(#yako writes #project sekai #pjsekai #hatsune miku: colorful stage #pjsekai tickle #project sekai tickles #polysho #nene kusanagi #tsukasa tenma #emu otori #rui kamishiro #ler!rui #ler!emu #ler!tsukasa #lee!nene

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