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harrygoeswest · 2 years ago

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Trigger Warnings: sweary sweary language, bullying

Word count: 9,451

Chapters three & four

five

I’d felt bad for ignoring George the other day, so I sent an apology and a brief response to his question, and we ended up arranging to meet that evening, but this time he picked me up and we drove out to Lechlade where he lived.

It was a beautiful village, much like Bibury - on the river with locks to watch the canal boats come and go. We sat outside The Riverside pub, with food this time as well as a shared bottle of wine, and talked endlessly about nothing while we watched the world go by.

In hindsight I wish I hadn’t gone. Not because I didn’t have a nice time - I did. But that was all it was; nice. He was gentlemanly to a degree, though somehow I felt like all our conversations lead back to the same thing. For a man who seemed to hold chivalry to a high importance, he talked about sex a lot. I’ve never been the type to squirm over those kinds of conversations, but it did get boring after so long.

And it’s not like he was bad in bed. He wasn’t incredible or utterly life-changing, but he wasn’t terrible. He was adequate. Unfortunately, adequate was not what I was looking for.

So when I woke early on the Saturday morning and found him wrapped around me, similarly to the way I’d been held in that dream that fucked me up so badly the other day, I felt nothing. Whoever that man had been in my dream, it was not George. For some inexplicable reason this all made me feel guilty. That was all I ever seemed to feel at the moment. Either that, or embarrassed. The latter wasn’t quite so uncommon.

I decided it was time to leave, even though it was only early. The alarm clock on his bedside table read just before 6:30am.

I peeled myself out of his hold and sat on the edge of the bed for a minute, rubbing my eyes and my face. I then went straight to the bathroom and used the loo. On my return I got dressed in yesterday’s clothes (obviously).

“Everything okay?” George asked, having not moved an inch.

I looked at him with a smile. “Yeah, fine. I just really need to get home before my daughter gets mad at me.”

That seemed to startle him somewhat. He frowned and rolled onto his back. “You have a daughter?”

I wasn’t at all surprised by his reaction. In fact, most men seemed to be put off the second I mentioned Ruby, so I’d often use the information as a scapegoat to leave.

I hummed. “Yep, she’s nearly 6.”

“Wow,” he coughed and sat up, “you, er, you look too young to be a mum.”

I tipped my head to the side. “Maybe.”

George didn’t say anything else.

I finished getting ready and then found my phone. “What’s the number for a taxi?” Ubers didn’t exist in the Cotswolds yet.

He gave me the contact information without moving a muscle. He didn’t even move when I had to leave. I knew after hearing the revelation of my young spawn he’d never try to contact me again. It was always the way. Fortunately it was exactly what I wanted.

At home I showered, dressed, and had a substantial breakfast before I collected Ruby from my parents’ house. I had a bit of a dickie tummy from the amount of alcohol consumed in the heat yesterday and wanted to make sure I wouldn’t be feeling shit for Ruby all day. The weather was too nice to miss out on doing something fun with her.

I drove the car around to Mum and Dad’s, noting how warm it felt even though it was only early spring. I’d put a dress on but didn’t pay a thought to my thighs when I made that decision. Now they were sweating and I was dreading the later unavoidable chafing.

“Mummy!” Ruby squealed the moment the front door opened, and appeared not seconds later at the end of the hallway.

“Morning, angel!” I squeaked, taking her in for a tight hug once she’d charged into me.

“Grandad did my hair!”

I looked her over as she pulled back, and my expression dropped. Dad had given her pigtail braids but they were uneven, one-sided, and somehow her parting went diagonally across her head rather than straight down the middle.

I coughed, “I can see that.”

“Do you like them?” She grinned at me, smoothing her little hands over the top of them.

How could I tell her they were giving me anxiety? I couldn’t. “Love them!” I said briskly. “Do you want to go and get your things?”

“Okay!” Ruby squeaked, and skipped away again.

I followed her at a much less enthusiastic pace. In the lounge, Dad was tidying away Ruby’s toys into their designated boxes.

“Morning, darlin’,” he said around a smile.

“Hiya.” I returned, noting that Mum was nowhere to be found. “Mum gone to the salon?”

“Yep.” He sighed. “Sorry about her hair.”

At least he knew it looked shit too. “It’s fine. She likes it, so who cares?”

“I suppose. What are you going to do today?”

“I don’t know.” I said lightly, and perched on the edge of the sofa. “It’s so nice outside, I want to take her somewhere.”

“Why don’t we go to the country park? My treat - she can wear herself out on the inflatable thingy.”

“Isn’t that a bit big for her?”

“Nah!” He stood up, taking the box of toys with him. “I’ll go in with her if it makes you feel better? Make sure she don’t drown or whatever.”

My gaze narrowed. It wasn’t very often my dad would offer to do a child’s play activity. “Are you avoiding staying at home alone, Papá?”

He huffed, but I knew he was joking. “Excuse me for wanting to treat my only child and grandchild to a nice day out.”

“Alright, fine. If that’s what you want to do, we’ll do that.”

“Well, it’s not about me, is it? It’s about Ruby.” He said, and I followed him out of the room.

I rolled my eyes. “Ruby?!”

“Yeah?!” She shouted back from her bedroom.

“Do you want to go to the water park today?”

Ruby squealed. “Yes please!” She ran across the landing to stand at the top of the stairs.

I was just waiting at the bottom. “Do you want to go on the inflatables with Abuelo?”

“Yes! Yes I do!”

I turned over my shoulder to where Dad had paused trying to shove the box into the right space on the shelf. “I think she wants to do your suggestion.”

“Alright.” He chuckled. “We’ll have to get a shift on, then, before it gets insufferably busy.”

I ushered Ruby to hurry up again.

My dad cleared his throat once she was out of earshot.

“What?” I asked at the look on his face.

“I’ve spoken to one of the local breeders about the dog.” He practically whispered.

I grimaced without thinking. “Okay,”

“He said there aren’t any around here at the moment, but he’s going to get in touch with others that aren’t a ridiculous distance away and see what he can find. Once he’s found one I’ll let you know so we can go and see them.”

I took a deep breath and nodded. “Alright.”

Dad placed his hand on my arm. “Floss, we’ll figure it out.”

“I know. I just don’t want it to turn out that we can’t get one in time or we get the wrong one, you know?”

“I do. But she’s an angel. Even if we don’t get a blue one, she’ll be happy with a Great Dane. In fact, I’d be willing to bet she’d be happy with any dog.”

I wasn’t sure.

I still wasn’t entirely convinced or even sold on the idea of getting this puppy at all, but it seemed I didn’t have much of a choice. Ruby had played me like a… what’s the saying? Anyway, Ruby had me wrapped around her middle finger.

“Mummy!”

I sat up at the sound of my daughter’s squeaking, a panic rising in me as it did any time she sounded scared.

“Mummy, Mummy!” She cried again, and I threw the covers off me, eyes still barely open.

The bedroom door was flung open as I swung my legs over the side.

“What’s the matter, darlin’?” I asked, not braced for the way she launched herself at me. I sounded half-dead.

“We need to go!” She yelled, and I realised then that she was excited, not scared.

If she mentioned a fucking blue Great Dane called Bongo I would actually shout at her for the first time in my life.

“Go where?” I said tightly as I pulled her up to lie next to me in bed.

Except she didn’t lie down, she sat on top of me like a damn monkey. “Kid’s club!”

Suddenly, it felt like the world had slowed down. Kid’s club? She fucking hated kid’s club. I’d witnessed a screaming snotting fit five days a week for the past six months over kid’s club, had I not? Did I dream that? Or was I dreaming this now? I might’ve slapped myself but that wouldn’t set a very good example.

“Kid’s club?”

“Yeah! We need to go now!”

I blinked at her. “Why?”

“Because!”

I looked at the time. 06:59. I sighed and turned my stare to the ceiling. My alarm was set for 7 anyway.

“Mummy, come on!”

“Alright, alright!” I flinched away from her when she smacked my arm. “Stop hitting me, please.”

Ruby’s hands fell to her sides. “We need to go, Mummy.”

I nodded absently, and then the alarm started screaming. I stopped it within seconds and sat up again. “Let’s go, then. Eager beaver.”

Was I completely bewildered by her sudden u-turn in attitude towards the morning club? Absolutely. Did I think that as soon as we pulled into the car park she’d start throwing another of her tantrums? Yes, I did. For that moment I couldn’t fathom what might have brought her to change her mind.

Ruby got dressed faster than she ever had done before, and was so keen on getting to school that she even put her own shoes on. She waited by the door, her little school-branded satchel in hand. I giggled to myself when I found her that way. She looked so cute.

I pecked the top of her head and turned her around by the shoulders. One thing she hadn’t done was her hair. I quickly brushed it and then tied it up for her in a ponytail with a scrunchie the same colour as the school uniform.

We then loaded up into the car and drove around the corner to the school. I kept an eye on her throughout the short journey, but she just had her head permanently in the window watching the world go by.

We pulled into the car park and I braced myself for a change in attitude. I thought she might scream when I got out and moved around to open the door for her, but by the time I got there she’d already let herself out.

“Bye, Mummy! Love you!” She shouted as she ran off through the gate towards the cabin.

I stared off after her with a blank look, suddenly unsure of what to do with myself. Perhaps Lorraine had finally listened to me and made my daughter feel comfortable enough to spend an hour at the club before going to school. I still didn’t know what the initial problem was, but I was just relieved to see Ruby her normal self again in the mornings.

And it continued that way for the rest of the week. Every morning she would charge into my bedroom minutes before the alarm went off to wake me up, demand we get up that instant and then wait by the door fully dressed and satchel in hand ready to leave. I’d drive her to the school and then she would launch herself from the car and into the hut to start her day.

I was relieved to some degree, obviously. It hadn’t been nice seeing her so distressed over a little club for so long and it was comforting to see her excited about it all of a sudden. I just didn’t know why. My usually very forthcoming child had kept her experiences in that hut very close to her chest - both good and bad.

While before I was trying to work out the mystery of why she hated going, now I was trying to figure out why she loved going.

I hadn’t been on a blind date in… well, ever. This was an unusual idea to me. Why would I want to go on a date with someone I’d never seen or heard of before? Why would anyone want to do that? I couldn’t for the life of me find any kind of appeal, and yet I was surrounded by people that did. I mean, Bibury was a small place. All the surrounding villages were equally small, if not smaller. There was actually every chance I knew this person very well. But then I hated the idea of not knowing until I arrived. At least with Tinder dates I knew what I was getting myself into.

Mostly.

There was one terrifying occasion where I thought I was meeting up with a handsome older man. Turned out he was just old. And I mean nearly 80. I didn’t live that one down for a while.

Because I didn’t know who I was meeting I had no idea what to wear. I spent nearly 2 hours trawling through my wardrobe trying to find something I was satisfied with, and yet I never seemed to be satisfied at all.

I knew I was going to The Swan, but the difference was it was dinner at The Swan. I might’ve been in there most Fridays for a drink or five, but I’d only ever eaten there with Ruby and my parents. Never on a date. For some reason, the prospect of eating completely threw me and all my usual outfit choices.

Eventually I decided on a burnt orange belted culottes jumpsuit with butterfly sleeves. I left my hair loose and gave it a quick brush, applied the smallest amount of makeup because I actually just couldn’t be bothered to, and put on a pair of white strappy braided low heels. I didn’t bother with a jacket, even though I knew I’d probably regret it later.

I walked from my house into the village and to The Swan, smiling at pretty much every single person I passed because I knew them in some capacity, whether it be well or not so. It was another pleasant evening. It seemed summer had come early and honestly I was delighted about it.

The Latin in me craved the sunshine and the heat. I often fantasised about moving Ruby and I to Colombia or Peru to make the most of it, but I knew my mother would never hear of it. While she was proud of our heritage she despised the thought of going back to South America to live.

Inside The Swan I found the host in the restaurant, a staff member I wasn’t very familiar with, and gave over Zara’s name.

The host smiled and looked through the diary. “Perfect. You’re just in that table by the window,” she pointed to two armchairs facing each other with a dining table between, nestled into a crook with a tall window.

It was all very romantic and lovely, and I’d forgotten quite honestly that I was here for an actual date, not just a one-night stand. The table had a tall candle in the middle of it and the lighting was dimmed ready for the evening.

I looked at the person already sitting in the left-hand chair, staring intently at his phone. My stomach fell.

“Oh my God,” I groaned, taking a step backwards and knocking into the desk. “Shit,” I looked at the host again, “I’m sorry.”

“Are you okay?”

I wasn’t okay. I moved out of sight of the table.

It was the dentist. Harry Styles, the sexy dentist, was my blind date. Zara had royally stitched me up. I was starting to panic. I could feel it in my chest and in my ears.

There was no way I was going to manage a date with him. I could barely string a sentence together in front of him, let alone sit with him for however long and eat in front of him. He’d get to the end of it and never want to see me again. Perhaps that was a good thing. But it was easier for me to actively avoid him than for him to actively avoid me.

I was so annoyed. He looked so good. He’d dressed up a little - wearing beige suit trousers and a black shirt that kind of looked sheer. His hair was a little floppy and messy like he’d just washed it and let it dry to its own will.

I had no problem fancying him. He was very fanciable, evidently. And Zara had been right - anyone would be a fool not to find him good-looking. His looks were absolutely not the problem. It was his profession and my idiotic inability to not be able to build a bridge.

Could I leave? God, I hated to have to be that person to stand someone up on a blind date, but I couldn’t bear the thought of facing him after those two ridiculous incidents in his practice. I knew for sure he thought I was crazy. I didn’t want to cement that even further by spending two hours just embarrassing myself in front of him.

“Miss?”

I looked back to the polite host. “Christ, I’m sorry. Um…” I peered around the corner for another look at him.

He was still very pretty and still very invested in something on his phone. I found myself yearning for him and I needed to stop.

“No, yeah,” I met her gaze again, “I can’t be here with that man. It’s not his fault, I’m just… completely and utterly useless.”

She looked very confused.

“I know I’m not making any sense. Basically, I just need you to tell him I’m sick or something. Please? I’m sorry to put you on the spot but I have embarrassed myself in front of him twice already and I’m not gonna do it a third.”

The host relaxed and lifted her head. “I see. Leave it with me.” She smiled.

“Thank you!”

I allowed myself one more peek at Dr Styles before I practically ran from the pub.

I was riddled with guilt and shame. I just stood someone up. I’d never done that before, because I’d always thought it incredibly rude. I was incredibly rude in one sense, but I was also terrified. Why did the only single man to roll into town for the first time in years have to be beautiful and a dentist?

In haste, I walked to Geri’s and let myself in without even knocking. I found her and Zara in the living room sharing a bottle of wine and a curry from the local takeaway.

“Why are you here so soon?!” Geri stood up at my breezy entrance.

“You can’t have embarrassed yourself already…” Zara said with a frown.

“No, actually,” I pointed at her, “I left before I could do that. In fact, I left as soon as I walked through the door.”

“Why?!”

“Because that man has seen me covered in grease and dirt and talk absolute rubbish on two entirely separate occasions, and I am not opening myself to a third!”

“How the fuck have you managed that? He’s only been here a few weeks.”

“With great ease, apparently.” Zara muttered. “I can’t believe you stood him up! You look incredible! He’d be drooling over you!”

I flopped down on the sofa with a sigh, gladly taking the half-empty wine glass Geri offered to me. I took a long drink. “Yes, but he is on another level, isn’t he? Like… next to him I am nothing.”

“False.” Geri shook her head. “He might be pretty but you are beautiful, señorita.”

I giggled but it was filled with anguish, and leant my head on her shoulder. “Thank you. Still doesn’t change that I know he thinks I’m batshit crazy.”

“You are batshit crazy.” Zara corrected. “But who cares? There is not a person in this village who has a bad word to say about you.”

“That’s true.” Geri agreed.

“Also, you don’t have to marry the poor sod. You could’ve just had dinner, gone home together; bit of sexy time; bit of fun; sent him home in the morning.”

I pouted. “I am not letting a man with a face that gorgeous anywhere near my,” I gestured wildly to my face, “food funnel.”

“Just call it your mouth, you absolute weirdo!” Zara hissed.

Geri rolled her eyes. “Why do you think Ruby calls her nose a snot bucket, Zara?”

“You are joking.”

I ignored the two of them and carried on drinking.

“Anyway, you’re never going to find the love of your life by not going on the blind dates I set up for you. You’ll be single forever.”

“Maybe I like the idea of being single forever.” I retorted. “I don’t want some stuck up male moseying into my life and telling me how to live it, or how to bring up my child. I’m just fine on my own, thank you very much.”

“Bet that’s not what you were thinking when Ruby’s daddy minced his way into your knickers, was it?” Geri quirked a brow.

I was having a hard time imagining Federico mincing his way into anything. How does one mince? Is it slug-like? Or like a criminal in a cartoon, with the jutting of shoulders and long strides with high knees?

“Well, he wasn’t exactly around for very long, either.” Zara muttered, and then looked directly at me. “What was he doing here again?”

I decided to tell a little white lie. I shrugged, “I dunno, some study abroad scheme, I think. I don’t remember much.”

“Was that the last time someone shagged you?” Geri’s question made me feel like a child who didn’t know anything.

I scoffed. “No.”

“Floss, why did I even bother setting up that date for you?”

“I don’t know. I had a moment of weakness? A vivid dream where I was stupidly craving the physical affection of a man. I won’t be doing it again.”

“You’re not holding out for that Italian, are you?” Geri asked quietly.

“No.” I laughed. “If I never saw Rico again I wouldn’t be surprised, and I’m okay with that. I’m happy where I am.”

My two friends looked at me in silence for a moment.

Eventually, Geri said, “Hungry?”

“Fucking starving, mate.”

six

The Easter holidays came and went in no time at all. Part of me had wanted to take Ruby away for a few days somewhere, but since I was apparently about to break the bank buying a dog for her, I’d tossed the idea in the bin and pretended not to think about it.

She didn’t seem to mind. She had so many friends I could never remember the names of that she spent most of the holidays at other people’s houses. On one Friday I had let her arrange a sleepover which she seemed to especially enjoy. Geri came over to help with it, and while the girls had the rule of the roost downstairs, we stayed upstairs and shared a bottle of wine and stuck a film on, but kept the door open so we could hear them in case anything happened.

Mum and Dad also offered to have her a few times so I didn’t have to worry about arranging childcare. She only came with me to work twice, but she seemed to enjoy herself. She always managed to find a way to entertain.

We were back to Monday morning, and I was having an internal debate whether she’d kick up a fuss over kid’s club again or wake me up early like she had done every day the week before the holidays.

When Ruby did inevitably wake me up, I nearly choked at the sight of her fully dressed in her uniform.

“What on Earth?” I laughed, sitting up.

“I want to go now, Mummy!” She squeaked, a delighted smile on her face.

“Rubes, it doesn’t even open until half 7, and I don’t pay for you to turn up that early.”

“Please?”

“No, darlin’.” I didn’t want to give Lorraine the satisfaction.

Ruby huffed and began to stomp away.

“Excuse me,” I called after her, and she stopped at the unimpressed tone of my voice, “come here, please.”

She turned to face me with a scowl, marching her way back to me.

I took her hands in mine and made sure she was looking at me before I spoke. “I’m over the moon that you’re enjoying that club again, but we don’t throw a strop because we can’t get what we want, do we?”

“No.” She muttered, looking to the floor.

“No, we don’t. Now, I can’t send you there before 8 o’clock because that’s not the arrangement I have with them. I also don’t have to - I like our mornings together. So, we are going to go at 8 like we always do, and in the meantime I am going to get ready at a normal pace and you are going to wait for me. Okay?”

“Okay,” She said.

“Good girl.” I replied, and kissed her hands. “Now, you can go and watch TV if you want while you wait. And if you haven’t brushed your teeth I’ll be really upset.”

My daughter’s hands slipped out of my grip, and she trudged her way out of the room. I watched after her as she left, a slight pout to my lips. She was cute and all, but one day she was going to give someone a real run for their money. I just hoped that whoever she did end up with liked a challenge.

I got ready at my usual pace since I was actually in less of a rush than I usually would be. It felt warm again so I dug another t-shirt out of the wardrobe and a pair of black jeans for the journey. I’d only have to cover up with a boiler suit when I got to the garage anyway. I tied my hair up without looking in a mirror, made my way downstairs and pulled my boots on.

Ruby was still eagerly waiting by the door when I got to the foot of the staircase. I giggled at her and stroked my hand over her hair.

Once again I drove her to the school and she spent the entire journey staring out the window. I didn't dare ask her what she was thinking - I didn’t want to pull her out of her daydreams like that, as curious as I was to know. As soon as I’d stopped the car in the car park she unclipped her belt and wriggled her way out of the car.

“Ruby!” I shouted after her, and fiddled my own way out. I hated running, but I was sure as hell going to this morning.

She ran straight to the hut without a hint of hesitation, and I just about caught up to her in the doorway. She looked around the playroom at all the other children, and her shoulders slumped with sadness.

“What’s wrong?”

Ruby turned around and walked back out of the hut again. “Nothing.” She muttered.

I was confused. And bewildered. One minute she couldn’t wait to get here and now she didn’t want to go inside again.

“Ruby, darlin’, you know you can tell me what’s upsetting you.” I reminded her, crouching down beside her and taking her hand to encourage her to look at me.

“I know.” She mumbled, angled towards me but not looking directly at me.

“So why don’t you tell me what’s wrong?” I squeezed her hand.

“Because you’ll think I’m silly.”

“I promise you I won’t.” I hummed, bringing her hand to my mouth. “Talk to me, muffin.”

She debated for a moment. I could almost see her thinking, eyes drifting slightly with her thoughts. She opened her mouth to speak, but stopped at the sight of another car pulling into the car park.

I followed her gaze, brows furrowing. A familiar black Range Rover pulled in, parking a few spaces away from mine.

“Yay!” Ruby squealed, and immediately ran off again.

I took a few deep breaths. “Oh, fuck.”

At a much less enthusiastic pace, I followed Ruby back across the playground to the car park. Simultaneously, Dr Styles made his way out of his car to keep a cautious eye on his own child.

“Oscar!” He shouted after he’d closed the door.

That name rang a bell. Why did that name sound familiar?

I looked at the child that Ruby was suddenly so eager to see. He looked like his dad, that was for sure. He was a little blonder than I expected, and his hair didn’t quite have the curly bounce to it that his dad’s did, but he was so very similar to the dentist in the face. He was a very cute little thing, I had to say. Not as cute as Ruby, obviously.

Oscar and Ruby met halfway and immediately grouped close to one another, giggling over something.

I tucked my loose fluffy bits of hair behind my ears. The dentist made his way towards me, wearing blue scrubs on his lower half and a tight-fitted black t-shirt on his top. His boobs looked better than mine, and he pulled off casual-doctor-chic better than I did casual-mechanic-chic.

The closer he got to me the more weighted I felt. He looked at my t-shirt as he was about to speak, and got cut off by his own breathy laughter. “Morning,”

I quickly glanced down at myself, reminded of which one I was wearing. It was white with a red printed line-drawing of a pair of legs on a bed, face-down, with the caption ‘Lying Down Club’. I cleared my throat and looked anywhere but directly at him, “Hello,”

There was a moment of dead silence between us, but Oscar and Ruby were chatting away with ease.

“Oscar actually asked me to drop him off later.” The dentist said, arms now folded across his chest.

I looked at him properly then. “Oh, really?”

“Yeah, I usually,” he pointed a lazy finger at the children and swallowed thickly, “drop him off when it opens, but he said he doesn’t like being there early because Ruby isn’t there.”

“Oh…” I couldn’t help but smile a little. “That’s very sweet. Ruby asked me to take her earlier today, actually. But I’m meaner and said no.”

“I don’t think it’s mean.” He shrugged. “It’s a lot of money to send them here.”

I nodded in complete agreement. “And the woman that runs it is fu-,” I stopped myself from swearing, even though the children were not interested in our conversation, “she’s horrible.”

“Lorraine?”

“Uh-huh.”

The dentist smiled at the floor. “Yeah, she’s a stern woman.”

“Certainly one way of putting it.” I muttered.

Suddenly the children took off again, running towards the hut.

“Hey! Ruby?!” I yelled.

“Bye, Mummy!”

I lifted my hands up and sighed. “Bye, then.”

Dr Styles chuckled behind me. “Must be nice to have so much energy.”

“Yeah, tell me about it.” I huffed and turned to face him again. “She woke me up this morning fully dressed and ready to leave before my alarm had gone off.”

Harry smiled, and I forgot how to breathe for a minute. “I’ve had two weeks of it. Took him to my Mum’s for the Easter Holidays and all he spoke about the entire time was Ruby. He adores her.”

I felt my cheeks warm but I didn’t know why. He was complementing Ruby, not me. Still - it made me proud to know that other children enjoyed her company and looked forward to it. “I had been wondering why she suddenly enjoyed coming here so much. Up until the week before the holidays I used to have to push her, kicking and screaming, to go inside.”

“It’s nice. I’m glad he could settle in here.”

“So am I.” I smiled back at him.

We stayed just grinning at each other for some time. I couldn’t take my eyes off him, he was so handsome. Perhaps I was a fool to have stood him up, but he didn’t know that was me. Or at least I hoped he didn’t. Still, I stood before a beautiful man that I would happily look at all day. Perhaps we could end up being good friends one day. It didn’t change that he was a dentist and I was terrified of having him anywhere near my teeth.

He looked at his watch then and panicked. “Shit, I need to go.”

“Oh, me too.”

“My first appointment is in like, 10 minutes.” He laughed, turning away. “Bye, Florence.”

“Bye,” I said with a limp wave, wandering back towards my own car.

Well - one mystery had been solved this morning. Ruby had apparently become best friends with the dentist’s son. There was nothing wrong with that at all. It just left me with that terrifying internal panic that I may have to see the sexy dentist more than I really needed to.

Bollocks.

Every so often, my dad’s friend Frank would bring his car into the garage for a seasonal service or it’s MOT or some other reason. I’d known Frank since I was a baby - his wife Diane was also a regular client of my mother’s and they were very close friends. My mother had always shown a kind of disdain towards Frank, and I’d only recently understood why.

“Good morning, Florence,” he knocked on the window that looked into the office at the garage.

The sound startled me a little, so when I looked up I was wide-eyed and somewhat irritated. “Oh. Hi, Frank.”

I was sure I wasn’t expecting anything from him for a while - he’d not long had his summer service. I ran my finger over the little calendar on the desk.

“I’m not due in for anything - I’ve just been hearing a few little problems with it.”

I took a moment to collect myself before I moved. I stood and faced him, noting the way he leaned against the doorframe as if he owned it. His eyes were dark and glaring and it made me squirm.

“What’s happening?” I asked, trying to keep my voice even as we moved out of the office to the garage floor.

“I don’t know, I was kind of hoping you could tell me.”

I lifted my head a little and stood in front of the car with my arms folded.

Deemed to be one of the most beautiful cars ever made, Frank owned a red Ferrari F355. He was obsessed with it, as anyone should be if they spent such an obscene amount of money on a car they barely drive. I, on the other hand, could take it or leave it. It was pretty to an extent, but the amount of problems it had weren’t worth the hassle of just owning it. Frank had had his since 1995 when they were first released, and I honestly couldn’t believe it had lasted so long. It was the only one of its kind I’d even seen, but it was notorious for its failures.

“Show me the problem, then.” I encouraged, bored of waiting.

“I was kind of hoping you’d do it.” He smirked, jiggling his keys in front of me.

I gave him a flat look. “Get in the car and start the engine, Frank.”

I half-expected a snide remark in return, but he saved me the headache today and did as I told him to.

The engine roared to life a minute later, echoing around the open garage and probably scaring the farmer across the road. I circled around the car while Frank revved the engine in a stupid and wanky manner. I was listening for any tell-tale sign of what might be wrong with it, but I couldn’t hear anything apart from just loud engine and exhaust noises.

I signalled for him to turn the engine off again and sighed.

“Well?” He asked as he got out again.

“I don’t know. I’ll have a look into it and come back to you.”

“Okay, thanks, Florence.” He smiled, and squeezed my arm.

That was why my mother didn’t like him. A squeeze on the arm from a man I’ve known since infancy might not seem like anything drastic, but he’d been known to do far worse. He was a dominating man - calling me Florence when he knew I’d always gone by Floss was just one of his many little ways to express that it was his way or no way at all. Up to this point I hadn’t had a terrible altercation with him, but I know my mother had. Mine was almost inevitable.

Frank was smart. He always came to the garage when he knew Dad wasn’t working. He knew that if he ever tried to pull anything with Dad around it would not end well, so he always visited when he wasn’t in. He also thought it was easier to charm a woman with talk about his expensive car than a man. Unfortunately for him, I knew a hell of a lot more about cars than my father did, and no amount of mechanical chat ever really impressed me.

“Will you do me our special family and friends discount?” He asked when I didn’t say anything, his hand still on my arm. He began stroking it, and I felt sick.

It was true - I had in the past naively agreed to charge him fees without labour costs because he was a family friend. Now he asked for it every time, and it constantly put me out of pocket.

“I’m not gonna agree to that until I know how much work there is to do.”

“Don’t be like that, Florence.”

“Frank, I don’t know how many problems there are with your problematic car. If it’s more than a day’s labour, I can’t really afford to go without it this time - Ruby’s birthday is coming up.”

Telling him that was a mistake, but it was already too late. I could see the newfound smarm in his eyes.

“Let me guess - she wants something extortionate like a dog.”

I might’ve been a bit thick, but I wasn’t an idiot. I knew my dad would’ve told Frank that Ruby wanted a dog in passing comment, he just liked to pretend it was a lucky guess.

“You already know she wants a dog.”

“I promise I didn’t.” He lifted his hands. “How about we make a deal? You give me the friends and family discount on whatever the car needs, and I’ll help you out in getting Ruby’s dog.”

“Or, you could just pay me the labour fees I’m owed and you don’t have to provide any money towards the dog.”

He laughed and looked away. “Come on, Florence. Loosen up a little.”

The last thing I wanted to do around that man was loosen up. “No.”

Frank huffed. “Think about it. I’ll even pay for the insurance on it.”

“No. I’m not a charity case.”

“And I didn’t mean it like that.” His voice had become soft and sweet and it was disgusting. “I’m just trying to help you out, we love Ruby.”

“Frank?”

My dad appeared on the forecourt, and I exhaled heavily. Thank fuck for that.

“Dave! What are you doing here?” He sounded jarred. I should hope so, too.

“Come to see Floss about something.” Dad said, and seemed perturbed by the question. It was an odd question, actually. Why did my dad have to explain himself for showing up at his daughter’s garage that he occasionally worked at? Come on, Frank.

“Ah, right.” He coughed. “Well,” he looked at me, “think about what I said, Florence. And let me know about the car.”

“Uh-huh.” I mumbled, but never looked at him.

Dad waited for Frank to leave before he spoke again. “I have some good news. Thought I’d tell you in person rather than on the phone.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

While Dad explained himself, I felt around the Ferrari for the bonnet lock.

“That breeder I mentioned has found a litter.”

“Where?”

He looked hesitant when I met his gaze again. “Wisbech.”

I’d never heard of it before. “Where is that?”

“Cambridgeshire.”

I lowered my head, still none the wiser.

My dad rolled his eyes. “It’s about a three-hour drive.”

I tipped my head back and sighed. “Well, I guess that serves us right for wanting to find something so bloody specific.”

My dad hummed. “He did also say that there was a litter in south Somerset with a ‘merle’ colour one.”

“What does that mean?”

“I think it’s light grey with little black spots.”

“Sounds pretty. But it’s not blue, is it?”

“No. And, if we were going to travel all the way to Taunton for a puppy, we might as well just travel to Cambridge for the one she actually wants.”

“Yeah, I think that’s fair.” I nodded.

“What’s wrong with this piece of shit, anyway?” He knocked the side of Frank’s Ferrari with his knuckle.

“I don’t actually know. It’ll probably be anything and everything that can go wrong with one, though.”

Dad laughed. “Want some help? I’ve done everything at home your mother asked me to.”

I grinned, patting his shoulder. “Sure. I need to put it on the lift because I’m almost certain there’ll be something wrong with the suspension.”

I didn’t finish Frank’s Ferrari until over a week later. I was right - there was a lot wrong with it. Suspension included. The exhaust manifold was fucked, and I’d told Frank about a year ago that he’d need to replace it sooner rather than later because it was a known issue with the model. Did he listen to me? No. Now his bill with me would afford about 10 blue Great Dane puppies. Sadly, I wasn’t taking home the full five-figure bill since most of it was going towards paying for obtaining the damn rare parts from inconvenient parts of the world.

Frank was in the garage waiting room while I finished the very last touches. Zara was in the front seat of the car while I was tightening the last bolt underneath. I rolled out and stood up; absolutely filthy, as I had been every day this week, and stuck my thumb up at Zara.

She started the engine and it finally roared to life, and I let out a long sigh of relief. I could finally get this fucker off my hands and out of my garage - and I meant Frank, not the car.

I wiped my hands on a clean cloth and went to find the old man so I could get rid of him as soon as possible.

“All done.” I said as I handed him the keys.

“Thanks.” He grunted. “Think I might have to skip out on the winter service this year, Florence. You’ve bled me dry.”

“Cars have a life expectancy, Frank. Especially expensive ones with as many problems as yours does. You’re lucky it’s survived this long.”

“I don’t control the prices of the parts.”

“Neither do I! I’ve charged you what they charged me, and that’s without shipping costs. You want to keep your shitty expensive car, you’ve got to expect to pay the bloody fees to fix it.”

“So what are you saying?”

I pulled a face. Was he really more stupid than me? “I’m saying either get rid of the thing or face the costs of it.”

“Floss,” Zara interrupted us.

I turned my gaze on her, and she was standing in the waiting room doorway with the office phone pressed to her chest. “Yeah?”

“It’s the school asking for you.”

As any parents’ would, my stomach dropped. I looked back at Frank. “It’s fixed, for now. Excuse me.” I headed towards the door and took the phone off Zara and squeezed out of the room. “Hello?”

“Good afternoon, is this Mrs Fuentes-Carter?”

I was too concerned to comment on the title error. “Yes…”

“Hello, I’m calling from the school reception.”

“Is something wrong?”

“Ruby is absolutely fine, but there was an incident at school today and Mrs Moon would like to speak to you at the end of the day if possible.”

“Incident? What kind of incident?”

“I think it would be best if Ruby’s teacher spoke to you about it.”

I sighed and looked up at the ceiling. “Okay, fine.”

An hour later I was pulling up at the school, parking in one of the few remaining spaces. Geri, Sharon and Debbie were already waiting by the gates, and I could also see the dentists’ car, but he wasn’t in it or visible outside. As I made my way across the carpark towards the school reception I gave Geri a limp wave, but I could tell by the look on her face that she didn’t understand what was happening. Actually, I didn’t understand, either.

Inside I announced myself to the receptionist, and she guided me down the hall to the right classroom. There, outside the door, the dentist was waiting with his arms folded and a concerned look on his face. I slowed my walk, noting that neither Ruby nor Oscar were waiting with him.

“What’s going on?” I asked, glancing into the classroom where the door was closed.

“No idea.” He said, aggravated and without looking at me. “That woman who runs the morning club is in there with her kid and ours.”

I frowned. “Why the fuck aren’t we in there, then?”

Before he could answer, I wrapped twice on the door and opened it without waiting. “Excuse me, what is going on?”

“Mrs Fuent-,”

“I’m not married.” I said flatly.

Mrs Moon sat back a little. Lorraine and her son were sitting on the other side of the desk facing her in plastic red chairs made for children, while Ruby and Oscar were sitting on the carpet in the far corner of the room, each reading a book.

“Miss Fuentes-Carter,” Mrs Moon tried with me again, “I’d politely ask you and Dr Styles to wait outside until-,”

“Absolutely not.” I retorted. “It is inappropriate for you to have a conversation with another parent while our children are present but we aren’t. If we leave, so do the children.”

Mrs Moon grew frustrated, but she didn’t know how to answer me.

“It’s alright, Connie.” Lorraine said calmly, and stood from her seat. “We were just finishing anyway, weren’t we?”

The teacher started again, “Um, no-,”

“We have an appointment to get to, so you can discuss the incident with Florence and the doctor.”

“Mrs Houchen, please si-,”

“Follow up with me in an email if you need to!”

We all watched as Lorraine and her well-built son breezed from the room, and it suddenly felt deathly quiet. I met Harry’s baffled gaze, and then I looked back to Mrs Moon, who seemed to be exasperated. Oscar and Ruby were still very quiet, but they were looking at us.

“I don’t mean to be rude, but what the hell is going on?” Harry demanded.

Mrs Moon pointed at the now empty chairs opposite her and rubbed her cheek. “Would you both like to sit down?”

“No.” We said simultaneously.

The teacher nodded despairingly, and stood up from her seat to perch on the edge of the desk closer to us. “I didn’t expect this all to be quite so dramatic, so I apologise. There was an incident at lunchtime and I was hoping it could be sorted in a more… calm manner than this.”

“Who is in trouble? Our children or Lorraine’s?” Harry asked, arms still folded across his chest.

“Ben Houchen claims that Ruby pushed him and Oscar hit him.”

“Excuse me?” I choked.

“I know, I know.” Mrs Moon stressed. “It’s very out of character for Ruby, I’m well aware, and for Oscar… well, I’ve never heard him raise his voice at all. Only when he’s playing football. So, I’m just as surprised as you, honestly.”

“Did anyone see it?” I asked.

The teacher shook her head. “No. At least no one wants to admit they’ve seen it.”

I screwed my face up.

“I should also add that neither Ruby nor Oscar have denied that it happened.”

I looked at my daughter as Harry did Oscar, and the look she gave back to me was blank, but I could see in her eyes she was sad about something. One thing I knew about Ruby is that she didn’t lie. She was too forthcoming to care about lying, even if she was in trouble. If she didn’t want to tell me something she simply wouldn’t, but she would never outwardly tell me that she hadn’t done something when she had. It was that reason I knew that whatever was claimed to have happened between my daughter, Oscar and Ben, it probably actually did.

“Have they said anything about what happened?” Harry asked, seeming a little calmer than me.

“They won’t say anything about the actual incident, but Ruby has told me that Ben isn’t very nice to her.”

I gritted my teeth. “Is this the first time she’s said anything about it?”

“Florence, I assure you - if I’d have known earlier that she might’ve been struggling with another student, I would’ve done something about it. I absolutely do not tolerate bullying in my classroom, or anywhere else.”

I felt emotional. I felt like a bad mother again. My eyes welled up and I tried to swallow it all away. “Ruby, come here for a second.”

My small child stood up and ran over to me. I knelt down in front of her and took her hands. “Muffin, will you tell me what’s been going on?”

She looked at me, then at Oscar, Mrs Moon and Harry each in turn and shook her head.

I stroked her face. “Why not, poppet?”

“Because you’ll be mad at me.”

“Ruby, we are not going to be mad at you for telling the truth.” Harry said softly, a lot closer behind me than I realised. “Neither of you.”

Ruby looked at Harry for a while, and then turned over her shoulder to look at Oscar again.

“In order for us to be able to get to the bottom of the issues, we need both of your help.” Mrs Moon said with her hands pressed against her thighs. “And we are not going to punish you for being honest, because what do I always say to you guys?”

“Honesty is the best policy.” Oscar muttered, staring at his lap.

“Exactly.” The teacher smiled.

“Was Ben telling the truth?” I asked, thumbing over Ruby’s cheek. “Did you push him?”

Ruby inhaled, lips pouting, and she nodded twice.

“Okay.” I took her hand and squeezed it.

“Oscar, did you hit him?” Harry followed on.

“Yeah, but only because he deserved it.”

I pressed my lips together, and I could see Mrs Moon staring at her lap, mouth a thin line.

I missed the silent communication between father and son, but in the next minute Oscar was trudging across the room. Harry placed Oscar on the table closest, and he sat cross-legged on the top of it while Harry sat against the edge next to him.

“Thank you for being honest, mate.” His voice was quiet and warm, and he rubbed his head. “What happened that the two of you felt the need to do that?”

Oscar looked at Ruby, refusing to speak again.

“Ben isn’t very nice to us.” Ruby finally admitted.

“In what way, baby?” I cooed.

“He says mean things. He says that I don’t have a daddy because mine doesn’t love me. And he says it’s funny that Oscar’s mummy isn’t here anymore and that she’s better off without him.”

I felt sick. I was on the verge of tears again, and I could see Harry’s hand visibly tighten around the edge of the table.

“Before Oscar was coming to kid’s club, Ben used to chase me around and pull my hair. I asked his mum to tell him to stop but she always just used to say that it meant he secretly liked me and he was just teasing me. But he’s never been nice to me, he’s just nasty and spiteful.

“And when Oscar started coming in the morning he stopped for a bit, and it was fun there. And then this week he started talking about Oscar’s mummy and being mean to him about it. But it was okay being at kid’s club now because even though Ben is not very nice, Oscar was still there.

“Oscar was really upset yesterday about what Ben had been saying and he’d hit him on the arm, so I said we should hit him back. Grandad always says we should hit someone back because it’s not nice.”

I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths. I’d never felt so degraded through my child before because of another parent. I didn’t know how to react - I didn’t know what to do. My baby girl was being led to believe that it wasn’t okay to not have a dad, because some horrible, nasty woman had brainwashed her child into thinking that. What kind of cruel, spiteful person do you have to be to think it’s okay to bring up your child to believe that?

I could hear Harry whispering to Oscar, and I immediately brought Ruby into my arms for a tight hug. I kissed her cheek, my tears dripping onto her skin, but I didn’t want to let her go.

“I’m so proud of you, Ruby.” I whispered.

“I love you, Mummy.” She mumbled.

“I love you, too.”

“Um,” Mrs Moon started, her voice cracking, “I’m sorry that the two of you had this happen to you in my care. I’m ashamed that I missed it, and I can assure you it will not continue. I am also really proud of both of you for telling the truth, and for standing up for yourselves. I do have to say that physical violence is not the way forward… but, you should be proud of yourselves for being honest and telling us the truth.”

“Neither of you should feel ashamed for not having another parent. And you definitely shouldn’t be made to feel that way by a bratty child who hasn’t been taught any different.” Harry said, his voice coarse. “Not having your mum or dad is not your fault. In fact, there’s no fault to have on anyone’s part. You’re both amazing children, and you should not be made to feel guilty, or lesser than, because you’ve only got one parent.”

I stared at Harry, somewhat awed by him. I wouldn’t have been able to put it as eloquently as that, but I appreciated him and that we were on the same wavelength.

We helped the children collect their belongings, said goodbye to Mrs Moon for the day, and walked through the school corridors out to the car park. Ruby clutched onto my hand the entire time, while Harry had Oscar on his hip. He looked a little big to be doing that now, but after the revelation we’d just had, I didn’t imagine Harry cared very much.

It was a bittersweet moment - one that was of course about to be tarnished by the sighting of the cause of all our problems.

Lorraine was piling things from the hut into her car, badgering Ben in the process. I thought I’d calmed down, but seeing the woman whose child made my daughter upset and did nothing about it filled me with a rage I’d never experienced before. Nothing had ever made me really angry, and this other mother was the exception.

I was about to do something so out of character, I’d terrify myself.

“Lorraine!”

I’ve got big ears!

Chapters seven & eight

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