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samkiszkasfacialhair · 2 years ago

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Love Doesn’t Leave

Love Doesn’t Leave

Pairing: Sam Kiszka and Female Reader

Summary: The story of the three girls who shared Sam Kiszka’s heart.

Warnings: SPOILER ALERT! WARNINGS MAY GIVE PLOT LINES AWAY! Girl dad Sam, mentions of sex, mentions of anxiety, smoking, sexual situations, dog attacks, alcohol, discussions related to sexuality and coming out to parents, death of a pet, implied death of parents.

Author’s Note: The chapter titles are the age of Sam’s daughter. They are all even numbers starting at TWO and going up to SIXTEEN.

Word Count: 17k (It’s long but worth it)

PROLOGUE

You never would have thought smiling at a long haired boy at a bar in Nashville on a girls trip would have led you to where you were now.

You sat in your boyfriend’s living room as he went to his bedroom to bring you a surprise. You knew exactly what the surprise was, or who the surprise was for that matter. He couldn’t keep his mouth shut about her. Sometimes, you had to stop him from talking about her. He would giggle and say “Sorry, I just love her a lot,” to which you would reply “I know you do, Sammy.”

He walked into the living room with his shoulders turned sideways, hiding what was in his arms. He turned to reveal a caramel brown and black striped puppy in his hands. Your heart melted the instant you saw her. She was perfect. She had a sweet face and she was the perfect size at the moment. Just small enough to hold in your arms, but big enough to the point where she wasn’t too fragile.

“Y/N, meet Rosie. Rosie, meet Y/N,” he said with a huge smile on his face. He grabbed her paw and waved it at you.

You walked over to her and pet her head and scratched her behind her ears.

“Hi Miss Rosie,” you said sweetly to her.

You pulled her out of Sam’s arms and she instantly took to you. She started sniffing and licking your face. You laughed and moved your head around as she continued. You sat down on the couch with her in your lap and continued showering her with love. She was easy to love, it was no wonder Sam was obsessed with her.

Sam sat down next to you and reached his hand out to pet her.

“Looks like you got a mom now, Rose,” he said, rubbing her behind her ears. She wagged her tail and panted at you, almost as if she was smiling.

That was the first night you slept over at Sam’s house. You were laying in bed with your head on Sam’s chest when you heard whining outside the bedroom door. Sam sat up and slid out of bed. He threw on a pair of boxers and walked over to the door, opening it slowly. Rosie pushed her way into the room quickly and jumped into the bed eagerly. She settled herself down in the warm spot Sam left behind and you stroked her back as Sam walked back over to the bed.

“She, uh, she sleeps with me. Is that okay?” he asked hesitantly, running his hands through his hair as he looked down. You could tell he was a little embarrassed.

“Yeah, of course it’s okay,” you assured him. “Just come here, let me love on you some more,” you whispered.

He got back in the bed and lifted Rosie up and over to his other side. He was in the middle of the bed, with you on one side of him, and Rosie on the other.

Rosie rested her head on Sam’s stomach and you cuddled yourself into his side and rested your head on his chest. His chest was skinny and bony, but warm and soft at the same time.

You looked up at Sam and he had a huge smile on his face. He was in heaven and he felt love all around him. If he had his way, he would be able to stay in this moment forever.

“My two girls,” he smiled, petting her head and giving you a kiss on the top of yours.

You fell asleep that night to the sound of Rosie snoring and Sam’s chest rising and falling underneath you.

Over those years, you learned just how much Rosie meant to Sam. He adopted her during a hard time in his life and she helped him get through it. It was a time when he just needed love and she was able to give it to him. She was always there for him and she knew him better than anyone. She calmed him down when he got anxious. She cheered him up when he wasn’t feeling like himself. She gave him whatever he needed. She was the reason he was who he was. It was her who made it possible for you to love Sam the way you did and you loved her for that.

You and Sam spent everyday together, with Rosie too of course. During the day the two of you took her for walks and played with her. At night, she’d stay home while you and Sam went out to bars and local shows. You would stay out all night drinking and smoking until you were both too far gone. When you came stumbling home, Rosie would be waiting for you in bed, ready for cuddles and kisses.

On nights you stayed in, you’d watch movies, eat meals you made together, and tease each other under the sheets until one of you caved in and before you knew it, the two of you were sweaty messes who desperately needed Jesus and a shower. Rosie would sit outside the room patiently until it was time for her to come back in and go to sleep.

When Sam was away for work, you watched Rosie and took care of her. When Sam took her with him, you missed her. Sometimes you missed her more than you missed him. When Sam took you with him, Rosie came along and you took her sightseeing and shopping. Sam always got her something from every city he went to.

With Sam, you were living a life you couldn’t even dream of. You loved traveling the world with him and watching him on stage. Everything about his life was wild, exciting, and electrifying. But more than anything, you loved who he was off stage. Sam was sweet, funny, and caring. Even though he had a lot on his plate and life got the best of him sometimes, he would drop everything to be with you when you wanted or needed him, and you did the same for him.

Speaking of dropping everything, that wild, crazy life with Sam came to a screeching halt the day you found out you were pregnant. The two of you quickly had to learn to grow up. Late nights at bars turned into early nights asleep in bed. Afternoon smoke sessions turned into morning doctor appointments. Traveling the world turned into traveling the city to every Target within a twenty mile radius until you found the right stroller.

In just a few months, there was a ring on your finger, Sam’s upstairs office was converted into a nursery, and you were stepping over dog gates that separated almost every room.

The house you built a relationship with Sam in would soon be the house you built a family with him in; and you couldn’t have been more excited.

Time flew by and before he knew it, Sam had three girls who shared his heart. Rosie, you, and your daughter. Sam was a girl dad in every way, shape, and form; and he loved every second of it.

Sam was careful with Rosie and the baby. He let Rosie near her to get used to her but he never left her alone with Rosie. He wasn’t sure how Rosie would react to her, or how she would react to Rosie. Babies are unpredictable and so are dogs.

Rosie was intrigued by your daughter. She would get as close as possible, sitting at Sam’s feet as he fed her or laying on Sam as he laid on the couch with the baby in his arms, trying to get her to sleep. Sam would prop the baby up on Rosie like she was a pillow and he’d give her a bottle. Rosie would stay still until your daughter was finished drinking. Sam thought it was the cutest thing. His entire camera roll was just pictures of the two of them.

Your daughter was intrigued by Rosie too. When she could crawl, she’d scoot over to the gates separating the rooms, stick her fingers in them, and Rosie would lick them, making your daughter giggle. Once she could walk, she would stick her own snacks through the gates to feed Rosie- which you quickly had to put an end to once Rosie got hold of a chocolate cookie and spent the night at the vet- which Sam dubbed the scariest night of his life.

As she got older, Sam slowly exposed the two of them to each other more, getting rid of the gates completely and letting them play together with supervision. His mission was to teach Rosie how to be a good big sister and teach your daughter that dogs can be and should be loved the same way people love people.

TWO

Sam sat next to you on the couch with your daughter in his lap and Rosie in yours.

“Baby, you have to be gentle with her, look,” Sam said as he took your daughter’s hand in his and stroked Rosie’s back.

“See?” he said softly, “Here, you can do it yourself.”

Your daughter looked up at Sam with wide eyes as he let go of her hand so she could pet Rosie herself. She was only two and had just gotten used to fully understanding how to play with Rosie. For a while she would try to sit on her or pull her, and you and Sam would have to intervene so neither of them got hurt. He decided this was a good age to teach her how to be gentle.

Rosie wagged her tail as your daughter gently ran her hand down her back. You watched her tiny, chubby fingers relax on Rosie’s fur as she gave her soft strokes.

“Daddy I did it!” she cheered, looking at the two of you for approval. Sam’s eyes sparkled looking at her and he gave her the biggest, open mouth smile you’d ever seen from him.

“I yove you Wosie,” she said with her little voice, giving Rosie a kiss on the top of her head.

You swore you saw Sam’s eyes get a little teary. You loved Sam’s eyes. They were your favorite physical feature on him. The way they turned down just a little bit in the outer corners. The way you could see the white underneath the irises of them. The way his left eyelid drooped down just a bit more than his right. They were like two crescent moons. They were perfect. And what made them even more perfect was the fact that he passed them down to your daughter. It was the first thing you noticed about her when she was born. She had those sweet Sammy eyes. Everytime you looked at her, you saw his soft eyes, and they melted your heart.

You snapped back to reality as Sam got up from the couch and placed your daughter in the spot he once occupied. He went to the kitchen and came back with a bag of dog treats. The crinkling of the bag got Rosie’s attention and she jumped off the couch and stood at Sam’s feet.

Your daughter crawled from her spot on the couch into your lap and turned her attention to Sam, who was standing in the middle of the living room.

“Watch me, Baby. Daddy’s gonna show you tricks he taught Rosie,” he said, digging his hand into the bag and pulling out a little dog biscuit. He held it out to her and spoke clearly and calmly.

“Rose, sit,” he said.

Immediately, Rosie dropped down to sit and Sam tossed the treat down to her. She caught it in her mouth and chomped on it. Your daughter laughed wildly and clapped. Her little legs kicked around as she cheered.

“Do it again, Daddy!”

Sam repeated his action, this time saying, “Roll over,” to which Rosie did exactly what he said. He got down low, put the treat in his hand, and Rosie stood up to eat it from his palm. He scratched Rosie behind her ears as she chewed the biscuit.

He looked over at your daughter on the couch who was smiling ear to ear.

“You wanna try?” he asked, looking up at her and raising his eyebrows.

She slid out of your lap and stood next to him and he got Rosie to stand upright. He handed her a treat from the bag, placing it in her little hand.

“Okay, hold it up so she can see it and say Sit, Rosie!”

“Sit, Wosie!” she commanded, holding the treat in the air, and pointing at Rosie with her other finger.

You watched her face light up as Rosie dropped to the ground to do what she said. Your daughter started cheering for herself saying “I did it! I did it like Daddy!”

You looked at Sam and you couldn't tell who was smiling bigger, your daughter or him.

“Give her the treat, Baby,” Sam said, laughing a little at your daughter who was so excited for herself that she forgot to reward Rosie.

She jumped over to Rosie and held the treat in her hand, just as Sam did before. Rosie stood slowly and ate it from her palm.

Your daughter giggled and Rosie’s tongue lapped over her hand. She wiped it on her shirt and Sam came behind her, scooping her up and throwing her on the couch between the two of you. He tickled her while you nuzzled your face in her neck and blew raspberries on it while she continued laughing.

Rosie jumped up on the couch and into Sam’s lap, licking his face.

He moved his face around and rubbed Rosie all over, laughing.

“Looks like someone’s jealous,” you teased, placing your daughter in your lap and rubbing her stomach to calm her down a bit.

“Rose, don’t be jealous,” Sam said in between laughs, “I got enough love for all my girls,”

“You two have fun, I’m gonna take this one upstairs for a nap,” you said, as you picked up your giggly daughter and stood up in front of Sam, who was dodging Rosie’s tongue left and right.

You held her out to him and he pushed his lips out for her to give him a kiss before you took her upstairs.

After some time, your daughter settled down for a nap in her bed and you returned downstairs to see Sam laying on the couch with a calmed down Rosie laying on top of him.

You walked over to them and gave Rosie a kiss on the top of her head before pulling her off Sam and placing her on the floor below. She trotted away towards the kitchen and you turned your eyes back to Sam, who was looking up at you with love in his eyes. You climbed on top of him, your legs straddling his waist. You ran your hands up his chest and his hands ran up your thighs.

You leaned down and kissed him softly on the lips. The hairs above his lips tickled your face. His lips wrapped around yours and he used them to pull you closer to him. His hands found your waist and gently pulled you lower so that you were fully sitting on his hips.

Slowly, you broke away from his lips and started planting soft kisses from the side of his mouth, to his cheek, to his ear. Your lips felt the smoothness of his skin combined with the rough hairs poking through. You kissed the spot right below his ear and up to his earlobe. That was the spot that made him go wild every time.

“Now, I want some time with Daddy,” you whispered into his ear.

“Mmm, how long do you think we have before she wakes up?” he said in a deep voice, just above a whisper, tilting his neck to the side to allow you easier access.

“Probably like an hour and a half,” you spoke into his neck as the vibrations from your voice caused goosebumps to rise on the surface of his skin and something else to rise underneath where you were sitting.

His hands snuck down from your waist, to your ass, and down the back of your thighs again. Sam’s hands were big and rough to the touch but his movements were always soft and gentle.

He sat himself up on the couch with you still in his lap. He turned so he was sitting with his feet on the floor and he gave your ass a smack, motioning for you to get up.

“Come on, let's go upstairs and Daddy can show you some more tricks,” he said.

So much for being soft and gentle.

FOUR

It was the day of your daughter’s fourth birthday party and to say she was excited was an understatement. To her, turning four meant getting a “big girl bed.” She had been waiting for this day for a long time. It was all she had been talking about for weeks. The box of the pieces had been sitting in her room for a while now. Danny agreed to come over the morning of the party to help Sam put together her new bed and help you set up for the party. He pulled into the driveway and before he even closed his car door behind him, your daughter was out the front door and running towards him.

“Uncle Danny!” she shouted, running down the driveway and into Danny’s arms.

Rosie trotted down the driveway after her and you and Sam followed behind. Danny shut the door and walked around to the front of the car to greet her.

“Rugrat!” Danny yelled back. He picked her up and threw her in the air. She giggled as Danny continued throwing her up and catching her. He started tickling her all over and she giggled. He dug his knuckles into her head lightly and gave her a light noogie. That was her and Danny’s thing. She would play fight him anytime she saw him. They wrestled on couches and on his living room floor. He would pretend to fight back until he claimed to be too tired and worn out, declaring her the winner. Then she would brag about how she’s stronger than him for the next few days and show off her muscles to anyone and everyone.

As he held her in the air, she started kicking her legs to get down from him- but Danny kept going.

“You’re four now, I’m not going easy on you,” he teased. He was still being playful and gentle.

“No!” she laughed and fought back. Danny was right, he was going harder on her than normal now that she was a “big girl.” But he was still playing and it was all just fun and games.

She grunted and wiggled her body to get out of his grasp. Danny wasn’t doing anything bad. He was doing what they always did. But Rosie didn’t seem to think so.

Rosie started growling at Danny but he didn’t notice.

“Daniel,” Sam said slowly. “Daniel, put her down,”

Rosie let out a loud bark which got Danny’s attention. He stopped and looked at her with your daughter still in his arms.

“Hey, Rose,” he said casually.

Rosie was standing tall. Her ears were sticking up on her head. Her tail was standing upright. She was flashing her teeth. You had never seen her like this before.

“Danny,” you warned.

“Daniel,” Sam warned at the same time.

The next thing you knew, Rosie was going for Danny.

Danny put your daughter back down as Rosie jumped on him repeatedly. He held her back by her collar and tilted his head back as she barked and gnawed at him. Danny’s arm muscles were bursting out of his shirt, trying to hold her back from his face. Danny was strong but he was no match for Rosie. You could see the fear in his eyes as Rosie continued at him.

Overall, Rosie was a gentle dog. She was a good dog. But, she was loyal. She would do anything for your family, including taking out Sam’s best friend who she’s known and trusted her entire life in defense of your daughter. After all, she was a pitbull. She had some fight in her.

Sam grabbed Rosie’s collar and pulled him off Danny. He held onto her as she pulled against him. Sam’s skinny legs fought to stay put on the concrete driveway.

“Shit Rosie, what the hell was that for?” Danny said with wide eyes, catching his breath.

Rosie pulled Sam over to your daughter and she stood in between her and Danny. Sam stood next to her and continued holding onto her collar, preventing her from moving. She had the same stance as before.

Danny raised his hands as a sign of surrender.

“Rose, girl, I was just playing,” Danny explained as if Rosie could understand him.

She continued to stare him down for a second.

Your daughter leaned into Rosie’s neck, petted her back gently, and gave her a kiss at the top of her head, just as Sam had taught her years ago. You watched Rosie’s tail and ears lower and her body relaxed as your daughter calmed her and showed her there was nothing to worry about.

“Rosie, it’s just Uncle Danny. It’s okay, he’s just bein’ silly,” she said, walking over towards Danny and peeking back at Rosie to make sure she was still calm. She stood next to Danny and took his hand as she walked him closer to Rosie.

Sam loosed his grip on her collar a little as your daughter and Danny slowly walked over to Rosie. Danny’s steps were hesitant and he held his palm out for Rosie. She sniffed it and started licking it, indicating that she was okay with Danny.

Danny and Sam exchanged looks and you watched Sam mouth “What the fuck?” to him as Danny shook his head. He looked down at your daughter and then back at Sam, still wide eyed.

Sam let go of Rosie’s collar and Danny knelt down in front of her. He grabbed her behind the ears and rubbed her head.

“I’m sorry girl, I was just playing,” he said.

Her tail started wagging as she licked Danny’s hand. He stood up and patted her head one last time before walking over to you and giving you a greeting hug.

“She almost killed you,” you whispered into his ear as you hugged him.

“My life flashed before my eyes, no joke,” he laughed.

“You want a beer? I know it’s 10 in the morning, but, I mean,” you laughed.

“A beer? Y/N, after that I need a shot!” he joked.

The five of you turned to walk back towards the house, with Rosie and your daughter leading the way.

Danny and Sam went upstairs to build her full sized bed. You met them upstairs with a beer for each of them and stood behind your daughter in her doorway, watching the scene for a bit.

Her and Rosie sat in the doorway with snacks and watched them. Your daughter was eating pretzels out of a cup. She’d pop one in her mouth and then reach next to her for the bag of peanut butter bites and hold one out for Rosie. It was almost as if Rosie was still protecting her from Danny. She didn’t need protection from him. But, Rosie was going to give it anyway.

“Shit, we put that piece on backwards,” Sam said, looking down at the instruction booklet and then pointing to a piece of wood a few feet away.

“Daddy, don’t say shit,” she giggled.

“Oop,” he said with his eyes wide, “Don’t tell Mommy I said that,” he whispered, giving her a little wink.

“I’m right here, Sam,” you laughed.

His head shot up and flashed you that goofy, angelic Sam smile, acting like he was completely innocent. That smile made you melt every time and he knew it. You smiled, rolled your eyes, and stepped over your daughter and Rosie, entering the room. You handed him and Danny each a beer and looked around at the mess of wood and screws on the floor.

“You guys gonna finish this today or does she have to wait until she’s five?” you joked.

“It’ll get done,” Sam paused, “Eventually,” he laughed, taking a sip of the beer and reaching for the piece of the bed he messed up on.

“Can I try that, Daddy?” you heard a little voice interrupt. You turned around and looked down to see your daughter pointing to the beer in Sam’s hand.

Sam looked up at you and raised his eyebrows, silently asking for your approval. You knew he didn’t mind. His thought was that kids should be exposed to adult things as they grow up so they don’t go crazy when they’re older. He had a point. His parents exposed him to things like that. Sure, he had a couple hiccups and a small run-in with the law but he turned out fine in the long run.

“A sip,” you said firmly.

Sam waved her over and she got up with Rosie following behind her. The two of them stood in between Sam and Danny. Sam held the bottle of beer to her lips and tilted it up slowly. The tiniest sip entered her mouth and Sam pulled the bottle back. She licked her lips and smiled.

“What do you think?” he asked, tilting his head to get a good look at her face.

A huge smile lit up her face. That answered Sam’s question instantly.

You, Sam, and Danny all exchanged looks and laughed at her reaction.

“Well, if her eyes didn’t already give it away, this sure does. She is one hundred percent your child.” you laughed and turned to leave the room.

“Beer and pretzels,” Danny laughed, digging his hand into her snack cup, “Smart kid.”

After some time, the bed frame was complete and Sam and Danny made sure it was sturdy and safe. They threw the mattress on top and jumped on it to make sure it wasn’t going to collapse. You walked back into the room with sheets and blankets to see them on top of each other, wrestling and laughing. They looked like two little kids. Sure they were both married and had kids, but deep down they were still kids themselves.

“You guys better stop before Danny almost gets killed again,” you warned playfully.

Your words got their attention and snapped them back into reality. They continued laughing as they got up off each other and off the bed. You put the sheets and blankets on and your daughter ran over to it and jumped on it instantly.

Danny gathered all the garbage and the boxes off the floor and took them out to the garbage.

You and Sam stood at the foot of it and she held each of your hands as she jumped. Her standing on the bed made her just the same height as you, and just a little shorter than Sam. She was having the time of her life. She threw herself down and wiggled around a little. She rolled back and forth from side to side. You could tell she loved how big her new bed was.

The rest of your day was all about her and her party. She put on her favorite outfit, put a matching collar on Rosie, and had the best day of her life.

When the party was over, you and Sam tucked her into her big girl bed, said goodnight, wished her a happy birthday, and turned to leave when Rosie trotted into the room. She jumped into your daughter's bed and made herself comfortable. Your daughter instantly wrapped her arms around her and used her as a pillow. The biggest smile spread across her face as she rested her head on Rosie. You knew that smile. It was the same smile you saw on Sam the night you slept over at Sam’s for the first time. She was in heaven.

That night, Rosie slept in your daughter’s bed for the first time. It was perfect now that there was space for her. She had always slept with you and Sam, until that night. She never came back to you and Sam at night after that. From that day on, Rosie was your daughter’s protector. She may have been an only child, but she still had a big sister. The bond the two of them had was unbreakable and it was unlike anything you’ve ever seen before. Seeing the love the two of them had for each other made your heart swell up completely. You loved your two little girls with all your heart. And you made sure to save just a little bit of love in your heart for Sam too.

SIX

As she got older, Sam started teaching your daughter how to care for Rosie. He taught her how to feed her, how to bathe her, how to walk her, and how to clean up after her. She loved taking care of Rosie. It was never a chore for her. She never had to be asked to help, she always just did it.

Her favorite thing to do was brush Rosie’s fur. You bought her a little brush for her to do it with. She would sit with Rosie on her lap and watch TV as she gently ran the comb down her back. It seemed to be Rosie’s favorite thing too. It definitely relaxed her considering she would fall asleep every time it happened. Not to mention, you loved it because it meant less stray hair you had to vacuum up.

You walked into your daughter’s bedroom at night to help Sam put her to bed. It was almost midnight. Greta Van Fleet played a pop up show in Nashville and you had all just gotten home from it. Even Rosie tagged along. It was just like old times for her and she still fit right into Sam’s rockstar world.

It was your daughter's first Greta show ever and Sam absolutely loved having her there. You left Rosie backstage with the guys’ manager and the two of you sat next to his side of the stage. It was tricky explaining what Sam did as a job at first and why there were thousands of people waiting to see him and her uncles. His fans were good about not stopping him when he was with her in public so she didn’t really understand that he was famous. She didn’t know what it meant to be famous to begin with. She knew he played music but that was it. However, once the show started, she quickly understood what it all meant.

Sam came over to you two often as he played. He blew kisses to you both and threw a rose to her.

When it was over, he walked off the stage and over to where you were. The fans screamed as he gave you a quick peck and pulled her out of your arms and over the railing, carrying her backstage with him. You joined them and Rosie backstage to finish the night. You spent a little bit of time drinking and hanging out with everyone. All the kids went off with Rosie and security and played with her in the empty arena as the venue got cleaned up and packed up. Once it started getting too late and your sleepy daughter returned to you and laid her head in your lap, you knew it was time to call it a night.

Upon returning home, you fed Rosie, showered, and went to tuck your daughter into bed. You entered the room to see Sam sitting on her bed, brushing her wet hair as she sat on a pillow on the floor underneath him. She was fresh out of the shower, in pajamas, and ready for bed. He was also in pajamas with his hair dripping wet and his eyes blinking slowly. You were all ready for bed.

You spotted Rosie laying in your daughter’s lap with her eyes shut. Your daughter had the brush in one hand and the rose Sam threw her in the other hand. She was brushing the fur on her back gently and slowly as Rosie fell asleep. You watched your daughter’s brush strokes gradually slow down as her hand got tired and her eyes started closing.

Her head would start drooping down as she sat there but as soon as Sam would brush out a knot, the pulling of her hair would snap her awake again.

Sam sprayed detangler in her hair and she winced as he tackled the knots. She let out little whines as he started pulling down on it with the brush. She was in pain and it was clear that the only thing she wanted to do was sleep.

“I know, Baby, I know, I’m sorry,” he said softly, “I get knots in my hair too. Especially after shows like tonight. Mommy’s gonna brush mine out for me,” he said, looking up at you and giving you a lazy smile.

You took the rose from her and put it in a cup of water next to her bed as you sat down next to Sam. You rested your head on his shoulder and closed your eyes. You wrapped your hand around his neck and scratched the hair at the base of his head. A soft smile spread across his face. You took in his freshly washed scent and gave his cheek soft little kisses.

Sam continued working on her hair for a few more minutes. Once the knots were out, he put in a loose braid and secured it with a hair tie of his that was on his finger.

“There, all done, Angel,” Sam said.

Sam pulled your sleepy daughter up off the floor and turned her to face him. She gave you both lazy hugs and kisses and she crawled into bed next to where the two of you were sitting. A very sleepy Rosie followed behind her and cuddled herself into bed alongside your daughter. Sam gave Rosie a few pats on her back and a kiss on the head.

You got up and started heading for the door, thinking Sam was right behind you. You turned around to see him lying in your daughter’s bed, all smooshed up next to her and Rosie.

Sam loved tucking your daughter into bed. He would lay there and hum to her and Rosie until they fell asleep. And sometimes, Sam would fall asleep himself and you’d have to wake him up and drag him to bed with you. Tonight was one of those nights. He was absolutely exhausted after the past few days he had. It was weeks of preparation just for this one show. His eyes were puffy and the dark circles underneath them could be seen from miles away.

You walked over to him and ran your hands over his cheeks and down to his beard. You rubbed the hair on his chin with your thumb and his eyes opened slowly.

“Sammy, Baby, come on,” you whispered. You grabbed his hand and pulled him gently out of the bed he was in. He groaned as his feet hit the floor and he stood upright. He continued to hold your hand as he rested his chin on your shoulder. With his eyes still more than halfway closed, he leaned on you and followed you out of the room as you flicked off the light and shut the door quietly.

You led him into your room and grabbed some hair oil from the bathroom before settling into bed for the night.

You laid down in bed with your back pressed against the headboard. You opened your legs for Sam to lay in between them. He lazily pulled his shirt off and laid down with his head resting on your stomach. You pumped some of the oil into your palms and ran it through Sam’s damp hair. Sam tilted his head back onto your lap and you ran your fingers through his hair to detangle it gently with your fingers. You took a peek at some of the faded brown hair coming from his scalp. Ones that would have previously grown out brown, but had now faded to an ashy gray color.

You ran your hands down onto his face, letting his beard absorb any excess oil. The hair on his face had grown in more, now covering more of his cheeks and jaw.

You continued moving your hands down to his chest, rubbing it up and down. You felt the muscles in his chest relax as he breathed deeply and slowly.

“You were so good tonight, Baby,” you whispered, slowly moving your hands back up to massage his scalp.

He let out a few hums, letting you know he liked what you were doing.

“Mmm, thank you. Thank you for bringing the girls tonight,” he mumbled.

“We wouldn’t have missed it for the world,” you said, kissing the top of his head as a tiny smile appeared on his face.

You watched his eyes slowly start to close as you continued massaging his scalp. You felt his entire body completely relax and melt into yours. After a few minutes, his legs twitched and he turned on his side, wrapping his arms around your back and using your stomach as a pillow. You ran your fingers lightly up and down his back as he drifted off into a much needed sleep. You were in heaven. If you had it your way, you’d stay in this moment with him forever. Even though you loved that crazy rockstar life the two of you lived years ago and had a little taste of tonight, this was better. You wouldn’t trade this for the world.

You looked down at him and smiled before drifting off to sleep yourself.

EIGHT

“Oh, come on! What are you scared of?” Jake’s son yelled to your daughter as she sat on the front steps of your house with her chin in her hand and Rosie’s head in her lap. He swirled around the empty driveway on his skateboard.

You and Jita sat on the front porch, cocktails in hand, waiting for Jake and Sam to come back from the store with more alcohol and food. It was the end of summer and you and Sam wanted to have a little cookout just for fun. You two were in your own conversation but you simultaneously listened in to the kids’ conversation as it played out.

“She’s too fast, I’ll fall!” your daughter yelled back.

Jake’s son was his son and your daughter was Sam’s daughter. Period. He was wild, reckless, and carefree. Getting hurt was an afterthought. She, on the other hand, was a little more thoughtful and cautious. Don’t be fooled- she had Sam’s adventurous side too, but she inherited his smartness, which overshadowed that (at least for now). Not to mention, your nephew was twelve and your daughter was eight. It was only a four year difference, but in the kid world, that was big.

He rode over to her and skidded to a stop in front of her. He held out her jump rope and his skateboard to her.

“It’s gonna be fine,” he assured her. “It’s okay to have fun, you know,” he said, making fun of her a little.

“I do have fun,” she replied sourly.

“Prove it,” he shot back. Yeah, he was Jake.

He had been letting Rosie pull him up and down the street on his skateboard for the better part of an hour while Jake and Sam were out. Every time he jumped off the board, she would come running back to him and they’d return to the top of the street and do it all again.

She stood up, tied the jump rope around Rosie’s collar, and walked her down the driveway and out onto the street with her cousin following behind her. That was another thing about her that was similar to Sam. Sam was the youngest of his family, so he always had to prove himself. And she was the youngest of all her cousins, so she was in the same boat he was as a kid.

He helped her get on his skateboard and put the jump rope in her hands. He put his black helmet on her head and buckled it for her. You saw Jake in him as he buckled it for her. Very kind and sweet. A gentleman.

“If it gets too fast, just bail. She’ll stop running when she feels you let go,” he explained.

He stepped back and stood on the sidewalk. Rosie started walking and the two of them smiled at each other as Rosie slowly started pulling your daughter down the street on the skateboard. A bigger smile lit up her face as Rosie got faster and the wind blew through her hair. After a little, it got too fast for her and she let go of the jump rope and hopped off the skateboard as it came to a stop.

She expected Rosie to stop, but Rosie didn’t stop. She continued running down the street with the jump rope trailing behind her.

Your daughter chased after her and called back to her cousin for help.

“Shit,” he said. He started running down the street after Rosie. His long, black hair flapped in the wind as he ran. He was fast and he passed your daughter, getting closer and closer to Rosie as he continued down the street. Your daughter stopped running when her little legs and lungs couldn’t keep up anymore, but he continued running.

You and Jita stood up and continued watching from the porch. There was nothing you could do but hold your breath and hope Rosie would stop or your nephew would catch her.

“Soccer paid off I guess,” you said.

She nodded, biting her nails.

Your daughter had moved onto the sidewalk but her son was the one running down the middle of the street at full speed, chasing a dog that wasn’t even his.

“Car!” you heard her little voice yell from the sidewalk. He looked back at her and then back at Rosie who was headed straight for the car. You caught a glimpse of panic on his face. He knew Sam would kill him if anything happened to Rosie. But, Jake would kill Sam if anything happened to his son because he was trying to save a dog that once again, wasn’t even his.

You saw a black car in the distance coming down the street. The car came to a quick stop in the middle of the street and the doors flung open. The sudden halt of the car spooked Rosie and she stopped in her tracks, thankfully.

You let out a sigh of relief when you saw Sam and Jake get out of the car.

Rosie ran over to Sam and jumped on him excitedly. It was as if he was saving her life and she couldn’t have been happier to see him. He held onto the jump rope to keep her close and calm her down a bit.

Jake’s son caught up to them and rested his hands on his knees, breathing hard after sprinting down the street. Jake walked over to him and smacked the back of his head.

“Seriously? How stupid are you?” Jake asked rhetorically.

“Dad, I, I thought she would stop running!” he explained, dodging another smack.

Sam handed the jump rope to him and told him to take Rosie back to the house. He looked at Jake and opened up his arms like What the fuck is wrong with your kid?

Sam got back in the car, drove slowly down the remainder of the street, and pulled into the driveway. As he got out of the car, the kids and Rosie were walking back up the driveway together with Jake supervising.

Sam was furious but he was holding it in.

You walked over to help Sam unload the trunk and he was silent. You gave him a kiss but he didn’t return it to you. His jaw was tense and his eyes were fixated on the beer in the trunk.

Sam never usually got mad. The only things that would really set him off were when he and Josh would disagree on ideas, or when he was stuck at work late at night. But on the rare chance he would get mad, he shut himself down and shut everyone else out.

The kids got back to the house and Rosie walked up the front steps and laid down under the table on the porch. Jake handed his son a case of beer and gestured for him to take it through the garage and into the house.

“Uncle Sammy, it’s my fault, I thought Rosie would stop running. I guess she was too small and Rosie didn’t feel it,” he explained.

“It’s okay,” Sam said, pulling out another case of beer from the trunk, “You just have to think sometimes, kid. There’s a brain in there somewhere, right?” he said, placing his hand on his nephew's head and pushing him playfully.

He was being nice. It wasn’t okay.

Once the kids and the guys finished taking the drinks and food inside, Jake came back outside with the kids and you told him the whole story. Sam was nowhere to be found.

After a few minutes, you smelled the faint smell of cigarette smoke and followed it to the backyard. You opened the gate and walked into the backyard to see Sam, standing on the back patio with a cigarette in hand and staring off into the distance as he blew smoke out of his mouth.

“I thought you quit,” you said quietly as you walked over and stood next to him.

“I keep a pack in the garage,” he admitted shamefully, looking down and not making eye contact with you. He could tell you were disappointed in him. He was disappointed in himself. You couldn’t remember the last time you saw him smoke a cigarette.

You looked over at him and sighed as he lifted the cigarette back to his lips. He closed his eyes and took a long drag of it. He blew the smoke out away from you and sighed.

“I know this sounds stupid but,” he paused, “If anything happens to that dog, I, I don’t know what I’ll do,” he said, shaking his head.

“It’s not stupid,” you said quietly, taking the cigarette from his hands.

You looked at him sympathetically. He wasn’t upset about the situation with the skateboard. He was upset because the thought of losing Rosie just crossed his mind for the first time ever. And not just losing her in the street, because she was safe now and Sam knew that. This had more to do with the fact that his mind was now open to the idea of losing her slowly. The truth was, she was getting older and he may only have a few years left with her. This was something he never had to think about before, and now it was all he could think about.

He reached to get the cigarette back from you but you wrapped your hands around his back and kept hold of the cigarette between your fingers and out of his sight.

He dropped his shoulders in defeat and rested his forehead on your shoulder.

You traced your fingers down his back with your free hand to calm him.

“Baby, she’s getting older. She’s not gonna be around forever,”

“I know,” he whispered, “I don’t want to talk about it,” he said.

You kissed the side of his head and kept your lips close to his temple.

“You know I’m here if you ever want to, right?” you assured him.

“Yeah, thank you,” he whispered, lifting his face and looking you in the eye.

You smiled softly at him and ran your hand down his cheek. He pushed his lips out to you and you gave him a gentle kiss. You broke away from him and grabbed onto his chin, pulling down his bottom lip with your thumb as you pulled the cigarette from behind you and into his sight again.

“Your breath is terrible from this thing by the way,” you laughed as you threw the cigarette on the patio behind him, and turned to step on it and put it out.

He smiled and whispered, “Sorry,”

“It’s okay. Now come on,” you said as you gave his butt a little smack, “I want you to make me one of your strong Sammy margaritas.”

He led you up the back steps and into the kitchen where the entire counter top was filled with bottles of alcohol.

Josh, Danny, their wives, and kids arrived at the house shortly after. As the day turned into night, Rosie stayed by Sam’s side. She knew he was on edge and having her near him calmed him down a lot. She sat at his feet under the patio table and rested her head on his knee, just to let him know she wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon. All night, he stroked her head and fed her pieces of steak until she fell asleep at his feet.

Once everyone went home and everything was cleaned up, you and Sam put your daughter to bed and had a little talk with her. You sat on the edge of the bed and he laid down next to her and sat up on his elbow.

“You’re lucky it was me in that car, you know that, right?” he asked.

She nodded.

“What if your cousin couldn’t catch her, huh? What if she ran away? What if she got run over?”

“Sam-” you interjected. You knew he was upset at what happened earlier today and he wanted to make sure your daughter learned her lesson. But you didn’t want him to take this too far. After all, she was only eight.

He closed his eyes and shook his head, realizing he was being a little too harsh.

“Sorry, I know that was a lot, Baby. I just got scared, that's all. I want to make sure you keep Rosie safe the same way she keeps you safe. Okay? Especially now that she’s a little older,”

Tears filled your daughters eyes and you saw her fighting back a little pout.

“I’m sorry, Daddy,” she said as the tears overflowed her eyes and ran down her cheeks. She wiped them with her comforter.

Sam rubbed her face gently and calmed her down. He reassured her that he wasn’t mad at her and that everything was okay. He told her that her getting older just meant she had to care for Rosie in a different way than she did before, and she seemed to understand that.

He gave her one last kiss on the cheek for the night, stood up, and looked down at Rosie, who was patiently waiting on the floor. She stood up by your daughter’s bed and Sam waited for her to jump on.

She tried but she couldn’t get up. You knew why. Sam knew why.

He reached down, grabbed her, placed her in bed next to your daughter, and gave her a kiss on the top of the head.

He looked at her for a second. You saw the way he looked at her. It was different than any other time. It was almost as if he was realizing this could be the beginning of the end.

He turned to you and led you out of the room, shutting off the light, and closing the door behind him.

TEN

Sam was leaving again. This time for two months. You were used to him leaving. You understood that was part of being with him. Before your daughter came along, you’d be right there beside him, cheering for him every night. But things changed. Family happened.

The band took a little hiatus after all the guys started getting married and having kids. But as the kids got older, things started picking back up for the band again. They put out a new album and did a little US tour for it. But now it was time for them to set out to tour it and promote it worldwide.

Your daughter understood that her dad’s job meant he had to leave sometimes. Usually, he’d leave for a few days or for a week at a time for work. But it was always in the states so the time differences weren’t ever too crazy. You could still talk on the phone and Facetime throughout the day. But this was the longest time he’d be away, and the farthest. The band was going to Australia, Europe, and ending the run in South America.

Anytime Sam would leave, he’d do it in the middle of the night. He would kiss your daughter and Rosie goodbye at around nine before bed. Once your daughter was asleep, he’d finish packing and leave at around midnight. It was better this way. She didn’t have to see him walk out the door. It would break both of their hearts too much.

But this time was different, not just because of length and distance. This time, Sam was taking Rosie with him. She was getting older and he wanted to bring her on tour one last time before she got too old to go. You could see it in her. The fur around her eyes started graying, she got lazy, stopped running, and she started to gain weight. Sam knew this would be the final time he could take her with him on the road. She was a road dog back in her prime and Sam wanted her to relive her glory days for one final run.

A few minutes ago, he grabbed Rosie from your daughter's bed to sneak her out. It was going to be your job to explain it in the morning when she realized Rosie was gone. Yeah, she would be upset, but it would be easier this way. This way, you didn’t have to hear her beg him to let Rosie stay and he wouldn’t have to explain to her that Rosie was getting old, which he didn’t want to do. You both saw it in Rosie, but your daughter didn’t quite understand that yet. It also didn’t help that Rosie aging was always in the back of Sam’s mind.

Rosie was sitting by Sam’s suitcases by the front door, ready to go. It was almost as if she knew she was going. She sensed it.

Sam’s Uber was already ordered and you were helping him pack his backpack with last minute things when you heard little footsteps coming down the stairs.

You turned to see your daughter in the kitchen doorway with tears in her eyes.

“Are you leaving, Daddy?” she asked, wiping the tears off her cheek and sniffling.

Sam froze and closed his eyes for a second. He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. You could tell he was fighting back tears. The truth was, he didn’t want to leave; which was another reason why he was taking Rosie with him. He wanted a piece of home with him.

He turned around, walked over to her, and crouched down to get on her level. He held her hands and rubbed them with his thumbs. He spoke quietly and calmly to her.

“It’s just for a little bit, you know that. I’ll be home soon. And you’re gonna come to see me in a couple weeks, right?”

You looked at your daughter and nodded, reassuring her. She knew you planned to see him in Italy and spend a few days there while he had some time off.

Sam continued, “And when you do, I’ll take you to get real Italian pizza. Sound good?” he asked.

She smiled a little and nodded. Sam wiped her tears and kissed her cheek.

“But you’re taking Rosie, aren’t you?” she asked with her voice cracking and tears filling her eyes once again.

She was like Sam. She was smart. She could sense something was different about this trip that the two of you weren’t telling her.

Sam let out a sigh, “Baby, Rosie’s getting old. She won’t be able to travel for much longer. I’m just gonna take her with me one last time, okay?”

She started tearing up again at his words, realizing she would be without not only him, but Rosie too. She has been without him before, but never without Rosie.

He took off the jacket he was wearing, leaving him in a white T-shirt and black jeans. It was one of his favorites. It was blue with brown trim and it had little white patterns all over it. Like all of Sam’s clothes, he’s had it forever and had zero intention of ever getting rid of it.

“I’ll tell you what,” he began.

He put the jacket over her head and when her head popped back up out of the neck hole there was a huge smile on her face. She put her arms in and hugged herself, wrapping herself up in the soft, worn out fabric. She was drowning in it. She brought the sleeve up to her face and took a deep breath, taking in the scent of her dad on it. You couldn’t see her smile but you could see it in her eyes that she was smiling.

Sam continued, “You keep this and you keep Rosie. You keep her with you, and bring her when you come to see me, okay?”

Tears filled your eyes as you watched the two of them. You couldn’t tell if this was warming your heart or breaking it. You knew Sam would give up a lot for your daughter. He already has given up a lot for her. He gave up his partying, his youth, and his carefree life. You knew he wanted this trip with Rosie more than anything to relive all that, and still, he was giving it up for her.

The silly and adventurous Sam you met when you were in your twenties had turned into a responsible and selfless man and father right before your eyes.

His phone buzzed and he pulled it out of his pocket so see an Uber notification that the car had arrived.

“Be good for Mom and take care of Rosie, okay? Love you,” he said as he gave her one last kiss on the cheek and stood up to you. You saw her mouth the words Love you too.

You handed him his white corduroy jacket that he left sitting on the couch and he threw it on over his T-shirt.

You looked at him with tears in your eyes, trying to hide your emotions from your daughter who was watching the entire thing.

“Come here, shhh,” he whispered. He held you close and rocked you back and forth for a minute. Tears ran down your cheeks and landed on the shoulder of his jacket. You pulled away and wiped your face and eyes dry. Sam still held the small of your back and tucked your hair behind your ear.

“I love you,” he said. His voice was velvety soft and calming. Just hearing that relaxed you and gave you all the comfort you needed.

“Love you too. Be safe,” you said softly, giving him a gentle kiss. He wrapped his arms around you and held onto you just a little bit longer than usual before giving you one last kiss on the lips, pulling himself away, and walking towards the door.

On his way out, he bent down to give Rosie a kiss and grabbed his bags.

You, your daughter, and Rosie all stood at the door and watched Sam get in the car with the darkness of the night surrounding him. You held her close to you and Rosie sat at her feet as you waved him goodbye. You rubbed your hand on her back as she pressed her body into yours, feeling the softness of Sam’s jacket on her. As the car drove off he blew three kisses out the window, one for each of you.

Once the car was gone you led Rosie and your daughter back upstairs and into bed. Your daughter kept Sam’s sweater on and clutched Rosie tight in bed. After that day, that sweater wasn’t Sam’s anymore, it was your daughter’s. That was one more thing he gave up for her.

Once you made sure she was okay and asleep, you went to your room and fell asleep with the scent of Sam on the sheets surrounding you.

TWELVE

It was a gloomy day and you and Sam were laying on opposite sides of the couch. He had been fighting a cold for the past week and it was finally coming to an end. You kept your distance from each other for a while but the lack of physical contact was killing him. He had been pretty miserable for the past week but he was slowly getting back to his normal self. All he wanted to do was relax when the sound of the front door slamming made him jump.

You sat up to see your daughter and Rosie, soaking wet in the doorway. She had taken Rosie out for a walk, hoping to get her outside for a bit before the rain came. But she was too late.

“Woah, what happened?” Sam asked in a bit of a nasally voice as he got up from the couch and walked over to the entryway to help her.

“We were coming home from the park and it started pouring!” she explained, “And with Rosie being a little slowpoke now...” she joked.

Rosie skidded and slipped across the tile floor. Once she got her balance, she shook out her fur, getting water everywhere. Droplets hit the walls, scattered all over the floor, and fell on your daughter, and Sam.

You grabbed a towel from the hall closet and handed it to Sam. He knelt down and wrapped Rosie up in it like a burrito as the smell of wet dog filled the room.

“Sam, I know you can’t really smell her right now but she stinks. She needs a bath,” you said sympathetically.

Sam rubbed Rosie all over to dry her a bit and sighed. This was the last thing he wanted to do.

“I can help you, Dad!” your daughter said eagerly as she pulled her wet hoodie off, leaving her in a dry t-shirt.

“Yeah, come on,” he groaned as he lifted Rosie up into his arms and headed for the stairs.

She followed behind him and you stayed downstairs to clean up the entryway. Once it was clean and dry, you joined the rest of your family in the guest bathroom upstairs.

Normally, Sam would give Rosie baths in the backyard with the hose. There was practically no clean up and she could dry off fully in the sun afterwards. But this time was different. It was the middle of fall and it was raining. There was no chance of going outside. Over the years, Sam and your daughter had mastered giving Rosie baths during the winter. They would work together to clean her up in the tub and shower her off in no time.

When you entered the bathroom, Sam and your daughter had gotten Rosie into the tub and Sam had the shower head in his hand, running a gentle stream of warm water over her body. The front of his shirt was already soaked from a combination of rain and shower water.

You sat on the counter top and watched them. You handed your daughter supplies and got towels ready for when they were done. Rosie didn’t particularly like baths so your daughter was holding her steady to calm her while Sam did the work. He handed her the shower head to hold onto and she held it down while he poured dog shampoo into his hands and onto Rosie.

He rubbed it all over her body and before you knew it, she was covered in bubbles. Sam scrubbed her all over, from her head to her toes, making sure she was fully cleaned. The whole time he did it, he spoke to her gently reassuring her with, “You’re doing so good, girl,” and “See, not so bad right?”

As Sam reached his hand out to hold the shower head again, a very soapy Rosie decided it would be a good time to shake herself off.

Bubbles and water flew everywhere. Small bubbles floated freely through the air and the two of them winced as chunks of bubbles landed in their hair and on their faces.

Sam let out an “Ah,” and your daughter screeched as the bubbles hit them.

The two of them looked at Rosie and looked at each other and started laughing hysterically. It was your favorite laugh that Sam had. It was a little giggle with a few snorts here and there. Those giggles combined with his stuffy nose made his laugh even funnier and the three of you got lost in that moment together.

“Rose, what was that for? Huh?” he said in between laughs, wiping his face with his shirt.

Your heart melted just a little bit there. Sam needed that moment with Rosie. He needed a little bit of fun and carelessness. He needed to feel something again. If there was one thing you could count on, it was Rosie bringing that out in him.

The two of them finished Rosie up and you handed them towels to dry her off with. Sam dried her off a bit, pulled her out of the tub, and onto the bathmat under him. He rubbed her all over with the towel to fully dry her and gave her a few pats to send her off.

“Alright, get her out of here,” Sam said as he used the towels to collect any extra water off the floor.

Your daughter scooped Rosie’s big body up and held her close, burying her face in her fresh fur and taking a deep breath. She gave her kisses all over as she left the room. Sam stood up and put Rosie’s bath supplies into the basket they came from.

“Now I need a bath,” he joked as he looked down at his shirt that was filled with water and wet dog hair.

“You want one?” you asked, looking over at him.

“Really?”

“Yeah,” you said softly, “Might make you feel better,”

Sam looked to the floor and thought for a second.

“That does sound kind of nice,” he admitted.

“What if,” you began turning to him and running your hand along the side of his face, resting it on his neck, “You finish cleaning up here and meet me in our bathroom in a few minutes. I’ll set it up real nice for you, okay?”

“Kay,” he whispered, fighting back a smile.

You left the guest bathroom and started down the hallway for your room. You looked over the railing and down into the living room to see your daughter and Rosie laying on the couch together, watching a movie. The whole house was dark due to the lack of sunlight coming through the windows. You could hear the rain falling outside. Everything and everyone was completely at peace. Except one person. The one person who needed it the most. And you were going to take care of that right now.

You entered the bathroom and turned on the faucet, letting hot water fill up the tub. You placed fresh folded towels on the counter and washcloths on the edge of the tub. You pulled some Epsom salts out from the bottom vanity cabinet and sprinkled a few scoopfuls into the water, instantly releasing the smell of Eucalyptus into the room. You poured just a little bit of your body wash into the water to get it bubbly.

Sam walked in, locked the door behind him, and dimmed the lights.

You turned to Sam as he pulled his shirt up over his head and threw it on the floor by the door. You took a minute to appreciate him. His hair rested just below his shoulders. The way it grew out was identical to the way it was years ago. But his body was different. It filled out as he got older. His shoulders grew wider and his arms grew bigger. The hair below his belly button got thicker and darker. He had just a little bit on his chest too. And his stomach muscles sculpted his torso and led your eyes down to the waistband of his sweatpants.

You ran your hand over his head gently a few times and looked him deep in the eyes. They were tired and you could still see a little sadness lingering in them.

“Will you come in with me? I just wanna hold you,” He asked quietly.

You nodded and smiled softly at him. You saw his eyes lighten up just a bit from that.

You kissed him gently on the cheek and broke away from him so he could continue to undress himself. You got yourself undressed as well and watched him as you put your hair up.

Sam stepped over the edge of the tub and let out a sigh of relief as he sunk his tired body into the hot water. He closed his eyes and sat there for a second with the water up to his waist. Then, he sucked in a deep breath, closed his eyes, and lowered his head under the water. His hair fanned out into the water, getting fully wet. Bubbles rose to the surface as he exhaled through his mouth and brought his head back up for air. He pushed his wet hair out of his face and rested his head against the tiles behind him.

He smiled up at you and tilted his head for you to come in. He held a lazy hand out to you and you took it, holding it for balance as you stepped into the tub, and sat down in between his legs. You leaned your back against his chest and closed your eyes. You could hear it in his breathing that the steam from the bath water and the scent of the salts were already helping his cold.

He ran his fingers up and down your arms, leaving a trail of water behind as he traced little circles. He gave your shoulders little wet kisses as droplets of water left his beard and trickled down your back. You pulled his hand up and interlocked your fingers with his. You brought his hand to your mouth and kissed his knuckles gently.

Eventually, his hands wrapped around you just above the water and he rested them over your chest. You held onto his forearms and rubbed them gently with your thumbs.

The two of you sat in silence for a while, just relaxing and enjoying the peace and quiet. Sam’s breathing slowed down and you smiled to yourself as you heard him fully able to breathe through his nose again. You could tell he started to fall asleep. You let him. He needed it.

The only noises in the house were the sound of the rain hitting the roof of the house above you and Sam snoring lightly behind you. Finally, everyone, including Sam, was at peace.

After some time, you sat up, turned around, and the movement of the water around Sam woke him up.

He raised his eyebrows, took in a deep breath through his nose, and smiled.

“I can breathe again,” he sighed happily. His congested voice was all gone and he sounded much more like his normal self.

“You sound good,” you whispered, running your hand over his face and rubbing your thumb along his cheekbone.

“I feel good,” he said.

“You wanna finish up?” you asked, handing him a bottle of shampoo.

He took it and squeezed some into his hands and brought his hands to his head. He rubbed it through his hair, getting it all bubbly.

He looked at you with that goofy smile that made you melt every time and you knew the gears were turning in his head.

Without warning, just like Rosie, he shook his head, letting bubbles of soap fly everywhere.

Your eyes squeezed shut as bubbles hit your face. You opened your eyes to see a very soapy Sam laughing and smiling back at you. You couldn’t even be mad at him. He looked absolutely adorable right now.

You returned a smile to him and brought your hand up to his face to wipe the bubbles from his cheeks. He closed his eyes as you wiped them off. He was finally feeling himself. You had your Sammy back.

You sat back from him and he sank back down into the water to wash out the shampoo, making the water turn foggy with soap. You turned the faucet back on, ran the washcloths under the water, and handed him one. You squirted some body wash onto them and the two of you cleaned yourselves and each other up. He pulled the plug on the tub and as the water drained, the two of you stood up, full of soap. You giggled as you slipped around and held onto each other for balance.

He reached behind you and turned the shower on. The two of you rinsed all the soap off and enjoyed the heat of the water falling on your bodies for a bit.

Once you were both completely done, you turned the water off and stepped out of the shower.

Sam got out first and wrapped a towel around his waist. He opened up the second towel for you and wrapped it around you as you stood in front of him. He held you tightly and rubbed your back to warm you up a bit.

The two of you left the bathroom, put on pajamas, and headed downstairs to relax and have dinner.

When you entered the living room again, you found your daughter, cuddled up in blankets on the couch with Rosie next to her. Sam threw himself down on the couch and leaned on Rosie. He grabbed her and put his face on her side, taking a deep breath in.

“Mmm, you smell so good, Rose!” he said, taking deep breaths and planting kisses on her body.

You laid down next to him and pulled a blanket on top of the two of you. He looked up to the TV and a huge smile lit up his face when he saw the third Harry Potter movie on the screen.

“Did you put this one on because you know it's my favorite?” He teased her.

“No, I put it on because it's my favorite,” she responded, giggling.

He laid next to you and tilted his head against your chest as Rosie crawled into his lap. The four of you took up the entirety of the couch.

You looked across the couch at your little family and realized you were sitting in the same exact spot you were sitting in the day you met Rosie for the first time. Almost twenty years had gone by and some things had changed. But when you looked down at Sam, he felt the same. He was that sweet Sammy who just wanted love. And you knew he was surrounded by it.

FOURTEEN

The front door opened and you heard footsteps running up the stairs. You looked over to see your daughter’s disregarded backpack on the floor by the front door. Soon after, you heard the sound of her bedroom door slamming shut.

Sam sighed as he walked into the living room, beer in hand. Rosie walked past him and he gave her a pet as she hobbled her way toward the stairs. She was moving as slow as ever. She had arthritis in her back legs and her heart wasn’t too strong anymore so she took the steps one by one. You knew where she was going. Anytime your daughter was upset, Rosie felt it and went to comfort her.

“What was that all about?” you asked, as Sam sat down next to you and threw his head back onto the back of the couch.

“It begins,” he breathed out, gulping down the beer.

“What begins?” you asked.

“Boy problems,” he said, closing his eyes. “From what I pieced together on the drive home, it's something about how she likes someone but somehow the whole school found out and now it’s the end of the world I guess,” he said, speaking with his hands.

You sat up and turned to him. Sam loved being a girl dad, but nothing could prepare him for this. He wasn’t ready to be a dad of a teenage girl. Things have been smooth sailing so far. But, both of you knew one day things would start to get complicated. That day was here.

“Hey,” you whispered, “We knew this would happen eventually,” you said softly, rubbing his thigh up and down.

“I know but,” he began, “I was an asshole when I was her age. I was a shitty boyfriend. I know I was. I don’t want her to go through what I put some girls through,” he explained.

He breathed out hard and drank more of the beer in his hand.

“And I dated some shitty, asshole guys and got my heart broken by them,” you replied.

He gave you a look that said You’re not helping.

“But, in the end, that all led me to you,” you said, smiling at him.

His face relaxed and he leaned towards you, giving you the softest kiss on the lips. The hairs of his mustache tickled your lip and you laughed a little with your lips still on his.

He pulled away and sighed.

“You think I should go talk to her? See if she’s okay?” he asked.

“Yeah,” you whispered, taking the beer from his hands and setting it on the coffee table.

You followed Sam up the stairs and towards your daughter’s door. When the two of you got close enough, you could hear her crying and talking to Rosie. The two of you leaned your heads towards the door and listened.

“You were the only one who knew, Rose. Until I told Amber. She was supposed to be my best friend. Now the entire school knows.” she said, sobbing, “And now I have to tell Mom and Dad before they find out from someone else.” You heard her voice muffle and you figured she either shoved her face in her pillow, or into Rosie.

You and Sam looked at each other, concerned. Her and Amber had been friends since kindergarten. Throughout the years they had little arguments as all friends do. But this seemed bigger. You thought maybe it was a bigger argument because it involved boys. But what was this about telling her parents before someone else did? This seemed serious. It could be anything. You were scared and even though he didn’t show it- so was Sam.

Sam took a deep breath and knocked on the door, pushing it open a little.

“Hey,” he said softly, “You wanna talk?”

You peeked into the room over Sam’s shoulder to see your daughter face down in bed, cuddling up against Rosie, using her as a pillow. Rosie was laying on Sam’s blue and white fleece jacket.

Sam walked in and you stayed in the hallway. Something told you this was a father-daughter conversation. You could see her reflection in the mirror by her door and you watched as Sam walked in and sat down on her bed next to her. He put his hand on Rosie’s head and rubbed her forehead lightly with his thumb.

He rubbed your daughter’s back with his other hand.

Anytime your daughter was upset, Rosie was the first to comfort her. Sam was the second. There have been many times throughout the years where she went to Rosie for comfort. Rosie cared for her and protected her with everything she had. It was like she listened to her and kept her secrets. Rosie wasn’t just a pet, she was her big sister.

And Sam was just as important to her as Rosie was. He was always there to listen to her and help her navigate her way through life. He had a lot of life experience and he always knew the right things to say to make her feel better. Sam wasn’t just her dad, he was her rock.

“So, the whole school knows you like a boy?” he began, trying to get the conversation moving. “So what? You’re in high school. It’s not like you’re the only one to ever like a boy,” he said.

She continued crying, not looking over at him. Sam pursed his lips, unsure of what to say next. The topic of boys never really came up before. You could tell that Sam didn’t exactly know what to do. He sat there for a little bit longer, just rubbing her back and shrugging his shoulders as he looked at you through the mirror.

He looked down at her and furrowed his eyebrows.

“There’s something else, isn’t there?” he asked softly, “You don’t have to tell me. But if you want to, you can.”

She sat up and wiped her tears. Rosie rested her head in her lap and she stroked Rosie’s back gently, again, the way Sam taught her to all those years ago. It was her favorite way to pet Rosie and it was Rosie’s favorite way to be petted.

“I don’t like a boy, Dad,” she said, looking down at Rosie. Her hands stilled and she breathed deep before speaking again. She kept her head down and the tears that filled her eyes dropped down onto Rosie’s fur.

“I like,” she paused, “I like girls,” she said, her voice quivering as she spoke.

Sam looked deeply at her as he took in what he just said. His eyebrows furrowed and he titled his head down to try to look at her face. His face was full of concern. He wanted to understand her. To understand what she was thinking and feeling. But he couldn’t even begin to. All he could do was be there for her in this moment and be everything she needed him to be.

Your daughter's eyes stayed on Rosie and her head was hanging low. She seemed scared and embarrassed. She didn’t even want to look at Sam.

“Hey,” he whispered. He put his hand on her back and lifted her chin with his knuckle. She fought him on it for a second, trying to pull her chin back down and closing her eyes.

She opened her eyes cautiously. They were filled with tears as she looked at him.

“There’s nothing wrong with that,” he said softly, shaking his head, “I like girls too,” he said, laughing a little. Leave it to Sam to bring humor into a serious situation.

She smiled back at him for a second before more tears flooded her eyes. He opened his arms to her and she threw herself into him, instantly. He grabbed her and wrapped his arms around her, holding her tight and rubbing her back up and down. You could tell she had been holding this in for a while and she was feeling every kind of emotion possible right now.

“Shhh,” Sam whispered, “Breathe, Baby. It’s okay. You’re okay.”

He hugged her for a while as she continued crying. He would occasionally turn and give her a kiss on the side of her head, letting her know he loved her and he was there for her.

After some time, her crying stopped and she calmed down a bit. Sam pulled back from her and wiped her tears with his thumb.

“Listen,” he began, “I don’t care who you like. And I guarantee Mom doesn’t care either. We love you, no matter what. And as long as you’re happy and you’re respectful to whoever you love, that’s all that matters, right? And if anyone has a problem with that? Fuck them.”

She nodded and sniffled. The tiniest smile appeared on her face. She felt relieved. She felt happy. But most of all, she felt loved.

“I love you and I’m very proud of you. I want you to know that, okay. Don’t you ever for a second think anything else,” he said, looking deep into her eyes. Tears started forming in his eyes as he spoke.

She wrapped her arms around him and rested her head on his shoulder. She closed her eyes and whispered, “I love you too, Dad.”

Sam pulled back and let out a little laugh, “I can’t believe you told Rosie before you told me, though. I’m a little hurt, honestly,” he joked.

He rubbed Rosie and shook her around a little as he spoke to her, “You’re a good little secret keeper, aren’t cha, Rose?” he said, kissing the top of her head.

With that, you left the two of them alone and went downstairs to order your daughter’s favorite pizza for dinner. You figured she could use a little pick-me-up. Even if she didn’t know you knew what Sam knew just yet. When it arrived, you went back upstairs to tell the two of them dinner was ready. When you walked into your daughter’s room you stopped and smiled to yourself when you saw her and Sam laying in her bed, looking at the ceiling with his arms behind his head and with Rosie smooshed between them. It was the same way he used to lay in her bed when she was little and he was putting her to sleep.

“You ever kiss a girl?” he asked, looking at the ceiling.

“Mhm,” she replied casually.

“They’re soft, aren’t they?” he said, as a tiny smile tugged at the corners of his lips

“Yeah,” she sighed happily.

Sam had always had a lot of girls in his life and it seemed that he was going to encounter a lot more as the years went on.

SIXTEEN

You and Sam laid in bed about to go to sleep. It was close to midnight. You knew Rosie and your daughter were fast asleep in her room. Your head rested on Sam’s chest as the light from the TV lit up the room ever so slightly. You heard the door creak open softly and you lifted your head and looked to your left to see a little black nose poking its way through the opening.

“Oh, look who finally wants to come sleep with Mom and Dad,” you laughed as she walked over to Sam’s side of the bed slowly.

“She comes back to us after ten years,” Sam laughed. “You missed us, didn’t cha Rosie girl,”

She couldn’t do much except walk anymore so Sam had to get out of bed to get her. He reached down and groaned as he picked her up. He put her in bed and she laid in between the two of you, taking your spot and resting her head on Sam’s chest.

“I’ve been replaced,” you teased, rubbing Rosie’s back up and down.

Sam rested his hand on her head and rubbed her forehead with his thumb.

Sam laughed and smiled at Rosie.

“My number one girl,” he said, giving Rosie a kiss on the top of her head before her eyes closed and she fell asleep.

You looked over at them, Sam had his arm around her and his chin rested on her head. The tiniest smile was spread across Sam’s face. It had been years since she slept with him at night. He was in heaven. They were both in heaven. She felt love all around her and so did he.

Shortly after that, you started to fall asleep to the sounds of Rosie snoring and Sam breathing deeply, just like you did all those years ago when you first fell in love with the two of them.

The next morning you woke up to the sound of Sam’s voice and the bed shaking next to you.

“Hey, hey, Rose. Come on girl,” he said with his voice full of panic.

You turned over, sat up on your elbow, and looked over at Sam. Both his hands were on top of Rosie and he shook her around, trying to wake her up.

She wasn’t waking up.

You didn’t say anything. You knew.

“Come on, please. Don’t leave me, Rose, please,” he begged, his voice trembled as tears filled his eyes.

He stopped shaking her for a moment. He held his hands still on her, feeling for any kind of movement. He grabbed her face and put his hand on top of her nose. He didn’t feel anything. No breath. No wetness. Nothing.

“No,” he said in a whisper, rubbing her face. He didn’t want to believe what was happening.

Tears fell from his eyes, to his cheeks, and splattered down to her fur below him.

He knew.

He dropped his entire body onto Rosie and wrapped his arms around her still body. His whole body shook as he cried uncontrollably. Your heart sank looking at him like this. He was absolutely devastated.

“No!” he sobbed into her. His voice was loud but it was muffled by Rosie’s body.

“Come back, Rose. Please, for just a little bit. Please,” he cried.

You’ve seen Sam cry before. But never like this. His heart didn’t just break, it was destroyed. It was shattered into a million pieces. He loved Rosie more than anyone else in the entire world. She was his first true love. Sure he loved you, and he loved girls before you. You knew that. But before you came along and before your daughter, he had her. She was a piece of him. And now, that piece of him was gone.

You put your arm around Sam and kissed the top of his head, fighting back tears until you couldn’t fight them back anymore.

He just kept repeating the word “No,” and sobbing into her.

You ran your hand over his head and down his back as he cried. You hugged him tight and rested your chin on his head. You would occasionally kiss the top of his head. You felt every breath he took as he sucked them hard in and let them out heavily. There was nothing else you could do to help him but to just hold him while he cried.

“You want some time alone?” you whispered.

“No. Don’t leave me alone, please.” he begged.

You nodded and continued holding him, kissing his head, and staying close to him.

It was close to thirty minutes before Sam calmed down. You lifted yourself up off him and rubbed his back softly.

He gave Rosie a final kiss on the head like he always did and he rubbed her face gently.

“I love you, Rose. You know that. And I’ll see you again one day, okay?” he whispered.

He sat up and leaned against the headboard, staring at the ceiling with a blank look on his face. It was almost as if he was processing everything and taking a moment to realize this was actually happening.

His eyes were swollen. His hair was a mess. His lips were dry. His cheeks were red. He was absolutely helpless.

You turned to him and rubbed his cheek softly. HIs cheeks were wet and his beard was filled with tears that had fallen into it. You used the cuff of your sleeve to dry his face.

“You know she came back to you last night to be with you because she knew,” you whispered as you patted his beard with your sleeve.

“Yeah,” he whispered back, sniffling. “I just wish I would’ve known that was it. Ya know?”

You nodded and looked down at Rosie. She brought him comfort her entire life. And in the end, it was him who gave her the comfort she needed to let go.

You and Sam sat in silence for a few minutes as he caught his breath and figured out what to do next. After a while, he broke the silence.

“You have to tell her. I can’t,” he whispered.

Without saying anything, you gave Sam a look that said Are you gonna be okay if I leave for a second? and he nodded in return.

Despite him being truly sensitive underneath everything, Sam was always the strong one in the family. But now, it was your turn to be strong. You gave him a kiss on the cheek and got out of bed. You left the door open as you left and walked down the hall.

You sent quick texts to his siblings, Danny, and his parents telling them what happened. You told them Sam was devastated and he probably didn’t want to talk about it right now. You told them that when he’s ready, he’ll reach out but not to be surprised if they didn’t hear from him for a while.

You put your phone in your pocket and continued down the hallway until you got to your daughter’s room. You had no idea how to even begin to tell her what happened. But you had to. You had to do it for Sam. He would do it for you if the roles were reversed.

You took a deep breath and knocked lightly on the door, opening it slightly. You saw her in bed, fast asleep.

You sat down on the edge of her bed and rubbed her back gently to wake her up.

“Mom?” she asked groggily as she turned over. She stretched her body out and rubbed her face before opening her eyes to see you.

She looked up at you and saw it in your face that something was wrong. She could tell you’d been crying.

“What’s wrong?” she asked, sitting up.

She looked around her to see Rosie nowhere near her like she was every other morning. “Where’s Rosie?”

You grabbed her hand and took a deep breath.

“Rosie’s with Dad right now. She um, she didn’t wake up this morning.”

“No,” she whispered. Her eyebrows furrowed and her mouth opened slightly.

You gave her a look that said it all.

“No,” she whispered again, not wanting to believe you.

She quickly got out of bed and walked out of her room. You followed her as she walked toward your room and stopped in the doorway, completely frozen when she saw Sam sitting in bed with Rosie’s body in his lap. He was petting her head softly and slowly when her voice caught his attention.

“Daddy?” she asked, her voice quivering.

He looked up at her and you watched tears fill his eyes again as his eyes met hers. He was holding it in as best as he could and he was doing a good job.

“Baby, I’m sorry,” he choked out.

She climbed on the bed and laid on top of Rosie, holding her tight. Sam rubbed her back as she cried. He was still holding it together and trying to be strong for her. You saw his jaw tense up and he tucked his lips into his mouth, biting them. He closed his eyes and concentrated on his breathing which was uneven and quaky.

“I love you, Rosie,” she said softly, gently petting her back the way Sam taught her to all those years ago.

It took you back to when she was just a toddler sitting in Sam’s lap, learning to be gentle with Rosie for the first time. The way her hand traveled softly over Rosie’s back and the way her sweet little voice spoke out brought you back to that moment.

Memories of Rosie and your daughter flashed before your eyes. You saw her throwing treats to her as a toddler. You saw her sitting on the floor of her bedroom brushing her hair. You saw her making a mess of the bathroom and splattering water and bubbles in every direction as your daughter giggled.

You knew the memories hit Sam too because at that exact second, he completely lost it.

You sat down next to Sam and held him tight. You used your other hand to stroke your daughter’s hair. Both of them, sobbing uncontrollably again.

After a while, Sam calmed down again. Your daughter took a little bit longer, but eventually her crying stopped. She gave Rosie a kiss on the head and sat up.

“I’m gonna go lay down for a little bit,” she said in between sniffles.

She gave you and Sam hugs and headed for her room to be by herself. You figured the both of them could use some alone time to get things out if they needed to. You also needed to get Rosie away from Sam because seeing her wasn’t helping him at all. To give your daughter a little peace of mind, you assured her that nothing would happen without her knowing about it first.

You picked up Rosie and carried her out of the room. You brought her downstairs and laid her on the couch just to get her out of the bed with Sam. If it was up to him, he would’ve kept her there.

Things were quiet that day. You took care of everything so Sam didn’t have to. He couldn’t. He laid in bed all day and your daughter laid in hers. As you took care of things, you would check on both of them periodically. Each time you check on Sam, you were greeted by a wet pillow and red eyes. When you checked on your daughter, she wouldn’t even show you her face. You took notice of what she was wearing though. It was the jacket. The blue and white fleece jacket that Sam had given her years ago. She wore it every time she was upset and needed comfort.

You had to force the both of them to get up, take showers, and eat- which neither of them did much of. You were mothering both of them at that point.

You were dreading the night time as it began approaching. You knew it would be hard on your daughter. She had slept with Rosie every night since she was four. You also knew it would be hard for Sam. You knew he’d be thinking that this time just 24 hours ago, he went to bed thinking Rosie would be with him when he woke up.

It was close to 10 pm and you snuck into bed next to Sam. You hugged him from behind and gave his shoulders gentle kisses.

“I think somebody needs her Daddy right now,” you whispered.

He sniffled and nodded. He knew he needed to make sure his little girl was okay. He knew this was affecting her just as much as it was him. Slowly he got out of bed for the first time that day. He looked at himself in the mirror, wincing at his appearance and rubbing his face. He put on a shirt and put his hair up. He looked at you nervously and you took his hand. You led him down the hallway towards your daughter’s room.

The door was open just a bit and light from a candle you lit earlier spread throughout the room, giving it a soft orange hue. You walked over to her bed and let go of Sam’s hand. You and Sam stood on either side of her bed and wordlessly, the two of you laid down next to her on top of her covers.

Instantly, she started crying. Sam rubbed her back and cried with her. You placed your hand on her head and gave her small kisses, letting tears from your eyes fall onto her pillow.

After a few minutes, most of the crying stopped and everyone had calmed down a bit after being able to get it all out again. You and Sam said your I love yous, gave her kisses, and got up to return to your room for the night.

As you reached the doorway, the sound of her voice caught you both by surprise.

“Wait,” she said, “Will you, will you guys stay with me tonight?” she asked softly. You could tell she was just a little embarrassed, asking her parents to sleep with her for the night.

You looked over at Sam and for the first time all day, you saw a tiny smile appear on his face. Tears filled his eyes once more, only this time, they were happy tears.

You blew out the candle and walked over to her bed in the darkness, this time with Sam leading the way.

You and Sam picked up the covers and slid into her bed on either side of her. You and Sam both rubbed your daughter’s back over the covers for a few minutes and then Sam’s hand rested on top of yours. He turned it around so that your palm was facing up and held your hand, rubbing his thumb along it.

For almost her entire life, your daughter felt Rosie next to her as she fell asleep. But on that night, when she needed her the most, she didn’t have her. She had something just as good though. She had you and she had Sam- the two people who loved her more than anything in the world. And even though Rosie wasn’t there anymore physically, she still had her love. It was there. It was inside her. It was inside all of you.

As you started to fall asleep, you heard Sam whisper, “My girls,” and you could tell just from his voice that he was smiling.

EPILOGUE: SIXTY FIVE

“What is that?” you heard a voice ask from the other side of the room.

“A journal I guess, I think it was my mom’s,” you said, inspecting a tattered, black notebook. You took a look at the outside. It looked like it hadn’t been touched in years.

Tears filled your eyes instantly as you opened it. It was full of pictures of your parents from when they were younger and your childhood dog. Your heart felt heavy looking at the photos. There was writing in it too and you could tell it was your mom’s handwriting.

The pages of the journal were yellow. The glue that held the pictures to the paper was old and crusted. Some of the pictures came loose and started falling out. You held them steady and flipped them over to see the date and then looked back at the image on the front.

Sam and Rosie, 2021

You looked at the picture of your dad and giggled. He had on a knitted hat and his hair was short. He didn’t have the beard you always knew him to have. Rosie was sitting next to him on a couch. She was just a puppy at the time. He had a stupid smile on his face. That smile that always made you laugh and made your mom melt. You ran your hand over the photo. Your vision got blurry as tears filled your eyes.

“I miss you guys,” you whispered as you wiped your tears with your other hand.

You closed your eyes and memories of your childhood flashed before you instantly. You felt your dad’s scratchy beard on your cheek. You felt your mom’s soft lips kissing your forehead. You felt a warm furry body laying on your legs. You felt their love all around you. They may have faded, but their love never left you.

You held onto the images of your childhood home that was once filled with life for a few seconds, holding onto them for as long as you could. You opened your eyes to see that home now empty and being packed away for good.

You flipped another page of the journal as you heard footsteps behind you.

Jake and Rosie, 2024

“Hey that’s me, isn’t it?” he asked, pointing at the picture of Jake with one arm around Rosie and holding a baby boy with a full head of thick, black hair in the other.

“Yeah,” you whispered, “The dates match up,”

You flipped through the pages some more, skimming through what was written on them.

“It’s all stories,” you said, “Stories from when I was little. Stories about me, Mom, Dad, and Rosie,” you paused after flipping through until you got to the middle of the journal. It went blank. Half the pages were empty.

“That’s weird,” you said. “It stops at Sixteen.”

“What happened at Sixteen?” he asked.

You thought for a second and then you remembered. Without saying a word to your cousin, you closed the journal and carefully placed it in the box labeled KEEP where it joined two wedding rings, a dried up white rose, a jump rope, and a blue and white patterned fleece jacket.

Author’s Note:

This is 100% FICTION! I am SO sorry I did this. Like, I still can’t believe I did this. Samuel, I am SO sorry. I hope you never search your name on tumblr. Also, the ages aren’t completely accurate. Rosie lived to be like 110+ years old so that I could write a lengthy fic so just ignore how inaccurately long her life was. Long live the queen I guess lol.

A few people have asked for a Sam version of ATS but I feel like this IS Sam’s ATS. This fic came to me in the same way ATS came to me. It started off as a little idea and gained meaning and length so yeah, this is my Sam ATS. (However an actual Sam ATS is not off the table just yet though because I have cute ideas for it).

Also sorry for the change of POV in the last chapter. I hope it was clear. Lmk if it wasn't.

Songs:

Vista Kicks: Alice

Elton John: Tiny Dancer

Coldplay: The Scientist

Ed Sheeran: All of the Stars

Kasey Musgraves: Rainbow

Thomas Rhett: Remember You Young

Demi Lovato: Lionheart

William Ross: Will Grows Up