#last time it completely fucked with my hairs texture but I bet I can avoid that somehow

[nicole-the-hololynx]

screaming and running and scratching at the walls of my enclosure I NEED TO FUCK WITH MY HAIR

[fndmxreader]

TITLE :   the end  |  part : one.   PAIRINGS :   broken up dean & cas ( in 2015 timeline ),  established poly!dean x reader x cas in present .   SUMMARY :  zachariah’s battle plan chances,  setting his sights on you, the angel sends you forward in time to 2015 to show you what lies ahead  .  takes place before dean visits .    INSPO :    it was a big big world, but we thought we were bigger, pushing each other to the limits, we were learning quicker. by eleven smoking herb and drinking burning liquor, never rich so we were out to make that steady figure. 

    "  YOU TAKE ME BACK RIGHT FUCKIN’ NOW,  ZACH “  you had gotten a lead from an a tore up photograph at bobby’s house of where to go,  however as of right now you were very much in the dark  .   the world had changed,  buildings crumbled,   shot up bodies laid out across the surface like an accessory .   so to say you were on edge was the understatement of the century  .  

    “ BUT YOU HAVE SO MUCH TO LEARN “  he doesn’t care,  continuing to read out the paper of the latest headlines,   you were seething with the narcissism and pride that radiated off of him,  it took everything in you not to slam his face against the dash board until blood poured out from his ears  “  you see,  you’re a problem,   getting in the way of dean saying yes  -  you aren’t meant to be here “  your eyebrows crease at the words,  your silence makes him continue  “ so this is to show you,  the longer you be a little pest,  the longer you pretend you actually matter to dean and... castiel “  the name like venom,  the cool exterior of the man fails to cover up the hatred of his brothers name  “ you’re only allowing this to happen,  in a way,  the world like this is your fault “  

    “ BITE ME “  you snapped,  fingers tightening on the steering wheel,  “ you and the whole fuckin’ armored up birds are so full of shi -  “  the fluttering of wings tells you he left,  you don’t even have to look at the passenger seat to feel the absence .  with a pent up frustration,  your fist smashes down on the wheel .  this wasn’t the first time an angel told you that you were in the way,   but it only made you want to stay more,  to push away the insecurities and stay beside your boys and never leave them,  you don’t care if it made you selfish,   you have been so unselfish your entire goddamn life,  put everyone first  :  gave creatures second chances when they don’t deserve it,  offering shelter to those in need no matter what the eyes hide .  for once in your goddamn life,  you’re going to be selfish so unapologetically that it becomes even more of a damn problem  “  put that on the heaven tabloid,  fucker “ you think,  already knowing that zach has your thoughts and movements on display like some lab rat running around in a maze box  . 

    THE DRIVE IS LONG AND LONELY .  the road seems to stretch out for miles,  your heart pounding all the way as you think back to photograph found,  dean and cas looked ... different,  older,  more warn out . it made your chest ache,  2015 certainly wasn’t expected to look like .... this,  even with the apocalypse,  you never dwelled on it too long,  ever trying to ignore the bad endings and simply think of what it would mean to succeed in stopping the apocalypse  .    your so out of it you swerve on the road,   thank god for the desertion,  otherwise a car crash would’ve certainly took place  .       

    YOU PARK THE CAR AWAY FROM CAMP WHEN YOU FINALLY GET THERE .   sneaking around as best you can as to not alert anyone from inside,  almost tripping on the stray tires and busted signs that scattered around the place,  avoiding the tripwires were an absolute chore,  you wounder how you managed it for a full ten minutes before finding an opening at the side .   allowing a sign of relief as you quickly dart towards he bused fence,  though your heart breaks at what you see ...  baby, completely torn apart  -  you know how much dean loved that thing,  by extension,  you couldn’t help but approach like it was your own,  bottom lip turning into a pout and your eyes borderline watering  “ oh,  what happened ?  i bet dean fought this every step of the way - “   you murmured,  hand slowly trailing over the roof of he car,  wincing at the texture of the rust underneath,  but not finding it in you to pull away . 

    YOU INSTANTLY STRAIGHTENED YOUR POSTURE AS YOU HEARD A GUN CLICK,    the cool metal pressed against he back of your head as a deep rumble of a growl hits ears  -  it’s familiar,  you know it,  never been on this side of it however and because of that your blood runs cold,  the hairs on the back of your neck standing as a wave of anxiety causes your arms to shake as you held hem up in surrender  “  actually,  it was deans idea  - “   

    “ ... DEAN “ you breathed out,  you know this isn’t your dean,  you briefly wonder where you are in all this -  your lips feel dry,  you turn around before he can threaten you again  -  you don’t miss the way his eyes widen with shock,  his mouth falling open before jaw tightens  “ THANK GOD,  it’s been a m - “ 

    “ SORRY ABOUT THIS,  DOLL “  he seems conflicted,  and you can’t help but resist the urge to ask when you could finish a damn sentence around here . though you didn’t have time to dwell on it much,  not when the butt of the gun collides with your head and knocks you out in an instant  .  

    YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW LONG YOU’VE BEEN OUT,  but when you come to you wake up in a dimly lit room,  your body locked in several places as you tried to move,  a low whine escaping your mouth in the absolute agony you were in,  the headache,  the body ache,  for a hot minute you think you’re in hell .  though there is one thing for certain,   you don’t need to look around the room to know dean is there,  he isn’t the type to leave a threat unattended,  out like a light or no   “  how lon - why the FUCK does my thigh feel like it’s been blown to shreds -  “   you body catches up to the pain,  eyes shooting open in shock as you did your best to sit up from the scratchy material beneath you .  

    “ COUPLE OF HOURS “   theres a scraping of a chair against the floor,  the floorboards squeaking with his heavy steps  “  'n i shot you while you were out,  salt gun  -  makin’ sure you weren’t a ghost,  done all the other tests too “   he didn’t have to shoot you,  in retrospect dean thinks that it was more for him that he did that  - to see you were real,  that you wouldn’t just vanish .  though you remain in the dark to those thoughts, but it was easy to detect a hint of remorse at the start of his words,  but he quickly closes off as your eyes squinted in his direction,  doing best to breathe evenly to get the pain under control .  

    “ I’D CALL YOU AN ARSEHOLE,  but you were only doing what you gotta,  damn deany ...  y’got an ice pack or something  ? “ 

    “ ENOUGH “ his tone made you jolt,  in both shock and ...  fear ,    suddenly very aware of how dry the back of your throat was,   eyes widening -  you could never handle the people close to you being angry,  you could take it from anyone,  any creature and any person  -  but sam,  dean ... castiel,  it made something inside you flinch  “  WHAT IS THIS,   what are you... ‘type of joke is this ? “  

    “ ZACHARIAH -  some sort of lesson,  i suppose “      “ CALL HIM,  RIGHT NOW “      “ if i could,  i would  -  i don’t wanna be here just as you don’t want me here “ the words hurt to say,  and you could tell that they struck a cord in dean,  though considering the intense pain in your ribs,  you wouldn’t let it eat at you...  not for another couple of minutes at least,  “ what... happened to you ?” 

    THE AIR WAS THICK,  SOMEHOW HE OXYGEN LEFT THE ROOM .  dean has never been more tense,  his eyes hardened but never before has he wanted to reach out to you,  to hold you,  cradle you and never let your timeline get you back .   his icy heart has never been colder,  but with you there he finally feels it beat  .   how does he begin to tell you what your life becomes  ?  him and cas have never been more apart ( basically broken up,  it was all too much ) between your death and sam saying yes to lucifer,  he broke,  collapsed  -   castiel having his break down over becoming mortal certainly didn’t help matters .  it was 2015,  nobody survives and nothing does .   so he gives you the shortened version,  the version where he doesn’t feel like there’s a knife in throat when trying to speak it  .  

    “ LUCIFER HAPPENED,  i didn’t say yes and sam did -   the croatoan virus ran rapid and now i’m just tryna help other people survive this mess “ a mess he feels responsible for,   a mess he wishes he could take back “  that about cover it  ? “  you only nod,   you feel like your head is about to explode with everything going on, you know he’s hiding more things;  but you can’t bring yourself to press it,  not when you’re having such a hard time trying to adapt to the current situation  “   good,  now you’re staying here,  i have to go on a run and the last thing we need is someone freaking out over seeing ...  you, when you’re out on a run “  he quickly adds the last part,  but you know its bullshit,  you can see the way his eyes cast a shadow  -  it seems this dean forgets how much you know him,  but you let it slide  (  he did just admit he thought you were a ghost,  so you can make an educated guess of what the hidden subject was ) .    you slowly raise yourself from the bed as best you can,  hissing at the pain that shoots through you,  blind from pain .  you miss the way dean twitches to help you .  

    “ SERIOUSLY ?  you can’t just keep me locked in a - “  as your eyes trail over his after you finally blink away the mist,  the look on his face makes you pause,  in fact the look he gave you made your features twist of that of a kicked puppy  “  whatever happened here isn’t my fault,  isn’t any of ours .  don’t punish me for the future shit,  i just got here “  it comes out stern,  even with the waver .    you know you break through to him,  but the walls are still there .  

    “ JUST ... “     it comes out as a sigh,  one hand raising to drag across his face, truthfully he just wanted to get away and fully register the situation at hand,  however to do that he had to get away  -  and by extension,  hide you so he doesn’t have to deal with questions about the situation before being ready  “ stop being stubborn -  “  turning to walk out of the door,  allowing a smile to cross his features as you utter  “says the most stubborn person on the planet.”