#last time I visited during this time of year I was DYING from the heat

[theoperaregina]

// Heads up! I'm in Mexico visiting familiy rn so I'll be a bit mia BUT i'll still be lurking 🤪🤪🤪

[balkanradfem]

I was having a bad physical/mental health moment, so I ignored my garden for a hot minute (few weeks). I would visit it briefly just to get some lunch ingredients, and then escape immediately before the other gardeners could berate me for the lack of maintenance (the garden shaming game is insane at the community garden). My garden never gets a lot of attention from me in the heat waves, because I also wither and die in the heat, and just getting there and back without fainting in the hot sun is a miraculous feat (low blood pressure).

My garden has developed weeds, the tomato plants have started showing diseased leaves from the over-exposure to hot sun, some of them have fallen to the ground, collecting various illnesses over there. Peppers have paused their growth because they didn't have enough water. My garden started looking abandoned, so I assumed everything was just doing poorly; the tomatoes must be dying from being sick, and everything else was just drying up, except for zuchinni which are immune to everything.

This morning, it was finally less hot, and I had a free morning, so I got up at 6, spent 20 minutes cutting some strings from old t-shirts to tie up the tomatoes again, and I decided to spend as much time as needed to rescue the tomatoes from failing. I got there, and started cutting the diseased leaves, tying up tomatoes to their sticks, in some cases re-stabbing the sticks into the ground where they've fallen off. I had a great time!

By the time I was done, 2 hours have passed, and I forgot just how many tomatoes I had planted; more than half of my garden is just a tomato forest. Now that I've cut off the sick leaves, I had a good view of all of the green tomato fruits, and realized I had an abundance. Which actually makes sense! After the horrible last year, I decided to plant as many tomatoes as possible, I was taking care of them meticulously since February, planted them as deep as possible specifically so they would be able to grow during drought and heat waves without any water, had planted multiple waves at different times, fertilized them and mulched excessively to give them a good growing place, so few weeks of neglect had absolutely no effect on them, they're thriving. Even the ones fallen to the ground have been so lucky to avoid rain so they didn't get sick from it.

I'm only getting a few ripe tomatoes a day right now, but looking at this tells me I'm about to be drowning in them:

I'm not even going to weed this garden, at this point my plants are too big to get out-grown, so as long as I avoid other gardeners and their looks of disapproval, I will be fine.

[fandomshifter]

Can I get general headcanons for the proxies? (Or basically Tim,Brian,And toby?)

Okay, I'm back with creepypasta things!! So send me more asks 🙏 🙏🙏

These headcannons are based on my au "Don't go into the woods." There are general all-around headcannons & personal headcannons for each Tim, Brian & Toby. Hope you enjoy!! Again, these are my personal headcannons. Yes, the mansion exists. Yes, it's found family. Yes, it's also horror. I have also watched Marble Hornets and hate twinkified versions of the proxies. Also, would anyone be interested in OC stuff ?

⦻ THE PROXIES ⦻

⦻ The proxies are the top dogs and have a lot of respect from members of the mansion. They are directly under Slenderman in terms of rank. When Slenderman is away on business with his brothers or 'recruiting', the proxies are in charge of the missions and the mansion.

⦻ All proxies have a scar of the symbol [⦻] located somewhere on their body, that's personal to them. Slenderman can use it as a homing beacon to find their location or sense if they have died, which he can choose to bring them back or keep them dead. Tim is on the base of his neck, Brian's is on the middle of his back, and Tobys is on the right side of his neck.

⦻ Proxies get given heightened senses. They can run faster and are stronger. However, they have to train to be able to deal with the new changes to their body. Ontop of these injuries can heal quicker, but they will still need to see nurse Ann or Eyeless Jack to get it bandaged and checked on. Small injuries take a short time to heal & and bigger injuries take longer to heal. Missing limbs take a shorter amount of time only because they are kinda important to be able to do their jobs.

⦻ Very frequent visits to many different states. For recruitment, proxies have a list of people they have to visit and get close to, basically infiltrating their life to see if they would be fit to work. Then Slenderman would give them "Slender Sickness," which would then result in said person either dying before going to the mansion or living to become a proxie, which is highly rare.

💊 TIM WRIGHT [MASKY] 💊

💊 Drives a red truck everywhere. He stole it from a victims house and changed the licence plate. He doesn't let anyone else drive it unless he really really needs too and it's usually Brian or Liu.

💊 He chainsmokes when he is stressed. People can usually find him smoking outside on the porch, or he is in his room smoking while watching a movie or a TV show. If he isn't smoking, he's eating sweets or chewing gum. He always has both on him.

💊 Considering the proxies' clothes get ripped all the time, for the first few months of living in the mansion, he learned to sew clothes back up. When people started to find out, they would always ask him, especially Jeff & Nina. So he would make people pay him depending on how long it would take him.

💊 Due to being from the South, his accent tends to slip out during heated arguments. People found it funny at first. Now they take as a warning not to make him ANY angrier. The last time that happened, Jeff ended up getting tied to a tree for 5 hours.

💊 He is the leader of the proxies, having know of Slendermans' existence longer than anyone in the mansion, so they have a close "bond" of sorts. However, he feels alone because, in a way, he has no one to relate to since Brian & Toby only knew of his existence for a few years before joining, but him...He's know Slenderman his whole life and feels like there is no life worth living without Slenderman because everytime he runs, it always comes back.

💊 He has: Depression, insomnia, suffers nicotine addiction & Slender-sickness.

🔫 BRIAN THOMAS [HOODIE] 🔫

🔫 Brian has a motorbike that he uses on solo missions or just to have a drive during the night. Most nights, he can't sleep, so him and Tim would race each other. Tim in his truck, Brian on his bike. They would race down empty & quiet roads.

🔫 He has a pair of reading glasses that he only wears in the comfort of his own room or Tim's room. He wears them to read [ obviously ], but also when he uses a computer and knows he is going to be on his phone for a long period of time.

🔫 He can understand & write in Binary [ code like 1s & 0s ]. He uses it to fuck with his victims because it freaks them out. He also uses it as a party trick during get-togethers or as a game.

🔫 Brian isn't mute like many others headcannon him as. It's more like he doesn't like talking to people he doesn't have, too. He has too much going on physically and mentally to the point where he doesn't care what people think of him just as long as he gets his job done.

🔫 Brian is in charge of locating targets. He sometimes works with BEN, but more often than not, he does it by himself, having been a computer nerd back in his younger days.

🔫 He has: Depression, PTSD, OCD & Slender-sickness

🪓 TOBY ERIN RODGERS [TICCI TOBY] 🪓

🪓 Toby grew up in a religious household, his father being a Christian man, so he grew up very sheltered on things such as 'self expression'. So now, being at the mansion, he expresses himself more. This being with clothing styles, makeup, gender, Sexuality. Ontop of this, he doesn't mask his personality or hide his mental issues behind a wall.

🪓 You can find him drawing in his notebook during his free time. If the weather's nice, he sits outside in the forest, and if it's raining, he sits in his room smoking a joint while he doodles away. Nobody knows what he draws or what they look like. It's like a diary to him.

🪓 Out of the 3, he is more hands-on. He doesn't think before he kills, he let's Tim & Brian do that. He also doesn't like using guns and things such as, like I said hands on, so blunt force trauma and mutilation are his go-to. Especially if the target is an abuser and so on and so forth, then their body parts will be found all over the state.

🪓 He hates being inside for too long, so he has a set time every day where he goes on an hour long walk in the forest. He doesn't do anything he just walks and takes in the scenery because each walk he takes is never the same.

🪓 He is not allowed to drive. Tim & Brian taught him how to, but he has a habit of speeding or panicking before he can turn the engine on. He stole Tim's truck once and drove around with Jeff & BEN. ALMOST crashed the car, Tim was fucking pissed, which is why he created the truck ban.

🪓 He has: CIPA, Tourette syndrome, ADHD, amnesia caused by slenderman & Slender-sickness.

[equallyshaw]

ᴅᴀʏ ɴɪɴᴇ: ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ʜᴏᴍᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴍᴇ - ʙʀᴏᴄᴋ ʙᴏᴇꜱᴇʀ

part of holidays with equallyshaw

warnings: swearing.

word count: 2.8k+

takes place over christmas and janurary! not really christmasy but idc lmao.

ʜᴇʀ ʜᴀɪʀ ꜱʟɪᴄᴋᴇᴅ ʙᴀᴄᴋ in a tight bun, her black dress clung to her irresistible curves and her free spirit is what caught broody brock boeser's attention, on this cold snow-free evening in vancouver. abba music pounded throughout the club, as divya 'viv' screamed the lyrics with her longtime uni friends. viv had just graduated this semester after 5 long years at uni of british columbia and she was more than ecstatic to raise some hell this weekend before heading home to toronto. after her 5 years in bc, she had no reason to stay on this side of canada so she was going to head home before heading to new york- hunting for a position on wall street.

brock watched as the dark haired girl danced and spun around with her friends, and felt the hair on his very neck raise. him and viv or 'vivian' as he called her, had hooked up many, many times over the course of her time on the west coast. it never led to anything, despite her giving him false hope. despite, them being exclusive to one another during the season. and him being faithful to her during the offseason - though she didnt know.

one of her friends since freshman year was on her way back from the bar, when she spotted some of the canucks. she rolled her eyes, slipping through people to get back to her group. "you'd never guess who's here tonight!" maya boomed and the girls all looked at her before shrugging. she then turned towards viv and viv felt a wave of guilt wash over. she had really like brock as a person, and hated toying with his emotions but she had told her self and her parents had too, that she couldn't date anybody while in school. her parents were pretty strict parents, but were leniant in other ways. "good god." she hummed, throwing back a shot of tequila to which she shut her eyes quickly, as the burning sensation died down. "he really did a number on ya, huh?" ginny another girl had teased while poking her elbow, "yeah for sure." viv lied. oh, he had in the most innocent of ways. but she had done it worse, breaking his heart over and over again.

❅

it was a while later when one of her friends sasha made her ways over toward elias, which then meant the two groups were bound to converse with one another. and as luck would have it, brock and viv found themselves close to one another. in proximity ofcourse, but viv didn't dare look at him. brock made a peace offering about 30 minutes later, holding out a cup of vodka cranberry and she knew she couldn't resist the free drink. she swiped it from him giving him a small smile, giving him a small nod. "how have you need davya?" he questioned, and she almost choked as he said her full name. "uh good! just graduated so im glad to be free of this place." she mused, sipping her drink. he nodded, "well that's great, congratulations!" he said smiling widely, a genuine smile was evident. she smiled back, the one that he had seen many, many times and he felt himself blush.

"still planning on wall street?" he questioned, and she nodded. "don't you know it. its not too far from home that my parents wont need to complain, but far enough where i feel like i can be my own person and find my own way." she said shrugging. he nodded, taking it all in. he hadn't said five words to her since may, and he had been dying to talk to her since then. "i always used to say that if vancouver didn't select me, i wanted to go to new york. something about it made me feel alive. if that makes sense." he said rambling a bit, and she could tell he felt embarrassed. "oh ofcourse! i totally get that...that's why im a sucker for it." she said whispering that last part and the two of their gazes connected. viv felt her chest begin to heat up, and the return of the familiar longing for him was evident.

he moved in closer to her, "maybe ill have to come visit you vivian." he mused, words and breath heavy on her neck. she felt herself shudder with pleasure, and looked at how close their faces were to each other. she grinned before leaning in and kissing him. he wrapped his arms around her back and pulled her in closer. they pulled away after a few seconds, "would it be crazy to ask you to come back to my place? again?" he questioned and she giggled, "thought you'd never ask...take me home." she whispered, with a cunning smirk on her face.

❅

two days later she woke up with an arm draped across her torso and chest, as her back was pressed into the mattress. she looked over and saw brock's familiar and luscious blond locks and smiled, rubbing small circles on his arm that was draped. god, she really needed to leave she thought. she had to catch a flight to toronto..but she didn't want to leave. being with brock felt right, it felt real and felt like home. though, her toxic side would never admit that. if she didn't get home, she'd hear so much from it. especially if she missed christmas and christmas eve. she felt the bed shift a bit, before brock rested his chin on her shoulder. she looked down, as she met his longing gaze. "morning vivian." he said softly, before she leaned in and kissed him. "morning brock." she hummed.

"whatcha thinkin about?" he questioned, pressing a kiss to her shoulder before exploring along her chest and neck. she softly moaned before he was now on top of her, and she had her hands wrapped in his hair. "just how my parents would kill me if i didn't make my flight tomorrow..but i shamelessly don't want to leave." she said shrugging and not daring to look at him. "whys that?" he said coyly, beginning to pepper her with kisses. she sighed, "because then they'd have the guy that they're forcing me to marry come find me. and like i don't want that." she said as if it was nothing. his eyebrows crinkled, as he froze. "sorry for this cockblock of a conversation." she said sitting up and he quickly moved off of her, as she wrapped around the throw blanket on the chair, next to the bed.

she wrapped her self and went to grab her phone from the kitchen where'd she had left it. "what do you mean, like an arranged marriage?" he questioned as she was about to leave. "yes." was all she said before walking out and then walked back in as quickly. "i don't want to be tied down to somebody that i don't love and especially not this quick after graduation, but they don't care." she said dropping the blanket, and bent down to grab her clothes.

"thats why you never wanted to be together, like be together for real." brock said putting the words together. she nodded. "she sighed, slipping on her underwear and jeans, her long locks draping over her chest. she turned back towards him, "that's why i kept breaking your heart...and mine." she said, the latter being softer. he stood up, and walked over towards her as she threw on her faux leather jacket. "what? you've liked me this whole time? just as much as i did?" he questioned and she scoffed, "well obviously brock, why do you think I've come back for the past 5 years almost? even if it crushed me saying no and leaving, you-you drew me back in and i loved our time together, even if it meant breaking my heart each time." she exclaimed, buttoning up her jacket. she looked up at brock, once she finished.

he stood in front of her and gave her a sad smile, and she hated it. she hated this look that he did whenever she broke things off, and would say no. "i keep hurting you, why do you keep holding on to hope, huh?" she exasperated. "because i love you! cant you see that!" he said raising his voice, acting as if viv didn't feel the same way. or as if she didn't see it.

"that will never be enough, brock! never!" she said running her hands through her hair. she sniffled, "that will never be enough and has never. its never been enough to be able to call off my wedding that as far as i know is in a few months. you're never gonna be enough for me, and i -i cant do anything about it." she said through tears, watching so many emotions flash through his blue eyes. he shook his head, "you're love will never be enough for me, and my love will never be enough to set me free." she said softer, and he titled his head just a bit at that; and his face dawned a pleading look. she shook her head, "im sorry brock." she said before walking out.

❅

it was janurary 20th, and she was heading into scotiabank with her older cousin and her husband. she had been living with her cousin for the month almost, after she told her parent's she needed time away from them. she told them that she couldn't go through with the marriage, and obviously they were not too pleased with her. they berated her and believed that she was bringing shame to the family. she said she was leaving, no matter their thoughts or feelings. once she had come back from vancouver, her older cousin sought it all out of her. her cousin absolutely adored the fact, that she had been seeing brock for almost 5 years. her cousin secretly wished that the two would somehow find each other again.

the two sat down in the club seats, and watched the players just beginning to take the ice for period 1. her husband handed over two beers, and viv quickly chugged half of it. "have you spoken to him..at all?" she questioned and viv shook her head. "nope." she sighed, quickly finding brock as he took his spot on the blue line for the anthem. she stood along with the rest of the arena, and listened to the anthem but through it all, she flashed back to all the times her and brock spent together. throughout the game she could not take her eyes off of the blonde-eyed beauty, that she had come to love. god, how she missed him.

at some point during period three with the two teams tied, the arena decided they would begin a segment on the jumbotron for 'kiss cam.' and ofcourse, her and cousins husband would be shown on the camera, despite there being a seat in between them empty. the girl next to her tapped her and pointed up, viv was terrified. she shook her head, a flash of fear in her eyes. the camera still did not move, and her cousins husband put his face in his hand, not believing that this was happening. the camera then moved away, and viv sighed a sigh of relief.

the camera flashed back to viv and her cousin's husband and they shook their heads again, and ofourse the crowd was eating this all up and the teams began to watch as well. brock looked up and felt his heart drop to his stomach, this couldn't be happening he thought. he looked away at the exact moment that her cousin came back and kissed him passionately in front of the crowd. the crowd, hooting and hollering. viv's cheeks heated up when her cousin laughed, sitting down back between them. "that was fun." she mused as viv rolled her eyes.

❅

two hours later, with a vancouver overtime win; coming from the princess himself, viv found herself, her cousin and her husband at the soho house bar. after about an hour of being there, she saw some of the vancouver canucks waltz in. she sighed, finishing her cranberry vodka and decided to call it a night. "no im gonna get a taxi, ill see you back at the condo." she said getting up, and began her dissent towards the front. she passed the team, with brock quickly recognizing the shade of dark brown hair from anywhere. he followed her out, and saw her waiting at the pickup area.

"vivian!" she heard to the right of where she was standing and she felt tears prick her eyes, once she realized it was him. "brock we cant do this here." she said as her uber pulled up, "then take me wherever you're going." he said confidently. she looked towards the uber and the grabbed ahold of his hand pulling him with her. "are we going home?" he questioned, "ill introduce myself." he added quickly and she sighed. "no, i left home once i came back. been staying with my cousin aditi or adi and her husband." she said leaning back into the seat. he watched the tension dissipate just a bit, and then took ahold of her hand that was resting on her thigh. he pulled it closer to him and rubbed her thumb softly. she looked towards him, and saw the look he had made her swoon these past years.

"come on." she huffed, pulling him out of the uber and up towards the condo. she opened it up quickly, and walked in and opening the door wider for him. she sat down her purse on the table near the door, and watched as brock took in the condo. the condo featured so much of her culture, yet it was modern and so different from other family members' homes. especially her parents.

"you left home?" he questioned softly, and she saw that it was laced with concern. "yeah my parents told me that this guy that they had been planning for me to marry, was gonna be making an appearance soon and i said no. i told them that if they went through with this, that'd they would be losing me. that i would not go through with it. id rather lose everything i own and have if it means ill be happy or have a chance to be. i had even made calls to my best friends in vancouver but my cousin said that i can come here first. and stay as long as i needed to." she said shrugging and pulling a bottle of water from the fridge. "want one?" she questioned and he nodded, taking one from her.

"she too never went through with her arranged marriage, and she's been able create her dream life and with the husband of her dreams." she said smiling softly, "who was sitting next to you tonight?" he questioned, and she nodded. he silently cursed himself and she saw his red cheeks. she shook her head, "all good brock. seriously. you had no idea based on what our last conversation was. i would have thought the same thing." viv said trying to soften the blow.

"i have spent the past 5 years absolutely head over heals for you and i would absolutely shoot myself in the foot if i didn't even attempt to mend or not even mend, but give us a chance." she paused as brock looked over at her. a sliver of hope coursing through his veins.

"i would be a fool not to at least attempt to explore my feelings and whatever it is between us. officially, that is." she said but looked away when he didn't say anything. he was just too stunned to say a word, he couldn't believe that the girl of his dreams who is a firecracker, kind, poised and absolute breathtaking would be now saying this. that she finally had the opportunity to explore this.

"really?" he choked out and she looked back at him. she nodded and he moved closer to her so now he was directly in front of her, and pulling a stray hair behind her ear. "pinky promise." she grinned, holding out her pinky. he looked down at it quickly, before looking back into her brown eyes.

pinky promises were their thing, it is what they said when the other was being serious. they'd come up with it after hooking up a few times her freshman year, and it stuck.

"pinky promise, b." she said and he smiled back, pulling hers and his pinky together.

they pulled away, and he wrapped his arms around her back while hers found his neck. they rested their foreheads against each others, taking in this moment together. because they didn't know how long they would go without seeing each other. well mostly viv.

but brock had other plans, "come home with me." he offered and she opened her eyes to find his already looking at her. "what?" she questioned in disbelief but also wanted him to say it again.

he smiled widely, pulling her as close as possible before speaking again. "come home with me." he stated, and she smiled softly. and not even a beat later, "take me home b." she smiled before he pulled her in for a long and deep kiss.

"oh! and can we celebrate christmas, i got you a gift.." she said pulling apart, and he grinned. "you and you're timing but yes, id love to spend christmas with you." he mused before kissing her once more.

hope you all enjoyed! pls like and reblog, if u did (:

tags: @cuttergauthier @jayda12 @toasttt11 @jackhues @dancerbailey3

[sorcerous-caress]

I was smiling the whole time while reading that lmao but honestly I think the only way a bad ending Sean could be brought back is by his tiefling mother Bayarmaa or a romanced Tav/Durge/Origin. Honestly Bayarmaa would probably be the only person from his past he wouldn’t turn on and not because that’s his mom but because he literally can’t find anything to judge her for. If he ever was brought back he’d probably break down not being able to handle what he became. He only ever wanted to help people like his mothers helped people, how they helped him. He’d probably be torn between going back to helping people or running off never to be seen again and dying alone and he hated being alone, the start of his romance is a scene where he asks to stay the night with you because he wasn’t used to sleeping alone. But with the Bad Sol vs Bad Sean stuff I honestly think he’d actually have fun doing that because honestly he likes killing more than he would like to admit and I honestly think he’d like the cat and mouse game. Leaving trails purposefully, taunting Sol in the shadows of a cave or forest, leaving notes in his empty cage telling Sol to step it up, etc. I think he’d be disappointed whenever it ended, thinking there wouldn’t be anyone else who put up as much of a fight as Sol did. Also a last minute thing I thought of is Bad Ending Sean cutting off the Robin tattoo on his face that repeats his mom Robyn Hood because in some versions of Robin Hood he was originally a noble.

There is no greater irony than bad ending Sol and Sean forming a fun platonic friend-enemies cat and mouse relationship whilst their good endings would have them being awkward long distance half-friends at best.

Like the single sliver of goodness that came out of this dumbsterfire of bad endings.

Would those five years before Sol's death would be Sean's last ever experience of having something close to a "friend to play with" ?

And honestly? Probably Sol's, too.

They don't want to kill him. That's the thing. They want him alive until their own death kills him alongside them, probably the heat from their fire melting the gold and burying him under it, which is their ideal scenario if he just stopped escaping their claws for one second.

And I don't think their death would change him, if anything it would probably strengthen his resolve that greediness must be purged from this world, because technically it is the thing that called his last remaining "friend" who didn't hate him and kidnapped him on the regular so he'd be near them.

I'd like to think that Lae'zel would visit them once, at least before their death. Sol asks if she's here to kill them. They're at the end of their lifespan and tell her they'd prefer to die by her hand, but they must finish what they started. They want to go out by their own fire and nothing else. Lae'zel lowers her sword for once, bidding her friend goodbye and never seeing them again.

If Sol saw Sean one day with his ripped face tattoo, they'd say, "Oh no, now you're ugly, how tragic." Ignoring how their own body has been deforming and mutating lately.

Do you think he would purposely stay in his cell during the night and only escape in the morning? Just so he wouldn't be sleeping alone? Their lair is probably filled with people plus their family members. They've kidnapped many others.

Imagine if Tav wasn't even near either of them, just off on their own farm with Shadowheart raising sheeps and cows while baking applepie.

Meanwhile Sol is burning down a forest because Sean escaped into the woods and he is too quick to spot between the trees, he keeps taunting them with his shadows and they're getting fed up and started turning everything to ash.

Would Sean even know when they're gone? Or would time just pass without Sol ever showing up to take the gold he stole back. Suddenly, it's all over, no more chasing, no more games, no more fun. Their whole layer has melted upon itself, and everything is buried under a mountain alongside their molten bones. Just quietness, and he is truly alone.

[satoshy12]

Happy Maegor AU, the Petty

Chapter 1

Year A.C. 41

Jaeherys surveyed the landscape as they stepped off the boat onto Dragonstone Island. They had narrowly escaped the Faith Militant's revolt in King's Landing, and were relieved to have found a safe haven. However, the island was not as Jaeherys had imagined it from the stories his father had told him as a child. It seemed that their uncle, Maegor, who had ruled Dragonstone in their absence, had made significant changes to the castle and its surroundings.

Jaeherys had never met their uncle, as the last time they had seen him was during a heated argument with his father nearly a decade ago, two years before Jaeherys was born. Despite this, Jaeherys knew from their mother's words that they would not be welcomed with open arms by their uncle, but would at least be granted guest rights while on the island.

Their Father Aenys informed his companions that Maegor, his brother, had not just one, but three Maesters serving at Dragonstone. This sparked confusion and tension between the brothers, as Aenys couldn't understand why Maegor would need such a large number of Maesters when there was already a shortage of them in Westeros. Maegor never provided a clear explanation for his actions, and the three Maesters eventually left without a word. Aenys also mentioned that one of the Maesters wore a Valyrian steel chain, while the other two wore chains made of silver and yellow/red gold and copper.

In addition to the Maesters, Maegor had also assembled a diverse group of healers, midwives, hedge wizards, and woods witches from all around Westeros. Jaeherys had been intrigued when he learned about his uncle's desire for three maesters specifically trained in medicine. He began to consider the reasoning behind this choice, as he knew his uncle could have chosen maesters with expertise in other areas such as ravenry or warfare.

As he delved deeper into the matter, Jaeherys came to understand that his uncle had built a medical facility for the benefit of the common people in the area. He had even heard travelers speaking that it was like the House of the Red Hands, a well-known medical facility located in Braavos, as they passed through the Aegon's Ford . This further convinced Jaeherys of the importance of having skilled medical professionals on hand to help those in need.

Jaeherys and his family arrived at the Islands, and as soon as Jaeherys stepped off the boat, he could tell that things had changed since his last visit. The Islands were bustling with activity, and there were signs of new construction everywhere he looked.

"It's been rebuilt," Jaeherys's father commented, looking around in amazement. "The High Septon told us that Maegor had taken charge of the construction, but I had no idea it would be this extensive."

Jaeherys nodded, recalling the High Septon's words. "He said they used a Dragon to transport the materials, which made the construction go much faster than they had anticipated."

As they made their way towards the castle, Jaeherys's older brother, Aegon, scoffed at the sight of their uncle and his family waiting for them at the doors. "They haven't even come to collect us," Aegon grumbled. "It's like they've forgotten that while we may be family, we are still the Royal house."

Despite his brother's complaints, Jaeherys couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement as they approached the castle. He couldn't wait to see all the changes that had been made and to spend some time with his extended family.

Jaeherys stood in the large room, taking in the sight of his uncle Maegor. The man was a towering figure, easily twice as wide and two heads taller than their father. His bulging muscles strained against his clothing, making it clear that he was a man of great physical strength. Next to him stood his wife, Ceryse Hightower, who was visibly pregnant once again. Jaeherys noticed their daughter, a girl younger than him with brightly dyed pink hair.

His mother, Queen Alyssa, commented on the unusual hair color, explaining that it was a new pigment coating from Essos that many other noble families forbade their daughters from using. Jaeherys' own sisters were also forbidden from using such a pigment.

"I am surprised that Maegor even allows her to use it," his mother, Queen Alyssa, commented. "Many other noble families forbid their daughters from using such a pigment or any in the first place."

Jaeherys nodded in agreement, having heard about from his own sisters . However, he was more interested in finding their cousin and his uncle's heir, Uthor Targaryen.

"We have to talk, Big Brother." No greeting or anything similar just a sentence as his Uncle made his way to the Solar and made his father following him and Aegon right behind them.

Lady Cerys smiled at us as they passed by. "While they talk, you can follow me to the garden," she said. "I'll have a servant bring us some tea, it's a drink my son brought back from Yi Ti. It's supposed to be much safer for pregnancy than drinking wine all the time."

Since becoming pregnant, Lady Cerys's marriage to her younger husband had undergone a radical transformation. It had even surprised my mother at how much their relationship had improved.

The garden was surrounded by tall walls made of glass, which let in plenty of light and allowed them to see everything clearly.

As they walked down the path, Jaeherys saw that the garden was filled with tables and chairs. Some of the tables were shaded by large umbrellas, while others were out in the open, basking in the warm sunshine.

He could see apple trees, cherry trees, and bushes full of berries and grapes. He saw that his sister Alysanne was tempted to pick some fruit for herself, but she didn't want to intrude them.

"Welcome to the garden," Lady Cerys Hightower greeted Jaeherys and his family as they arrived. "The Myrish glassblowers created this as a gift for me, as a thank you for my son Uthor's assistance in defending against a Dothraki invasion. It's a peaceful place where we can relax and the children can play and enjoy the fruits of the trees."

Jaeherys was curious to hear more about his cousin Uthor, so he asked Lady Cerys about him. "Is Uthor here now in Dragonstone?" he inquired.

"Yes, he's in the library studying with the Maesters," Lady Cerys replied.

Jaeherys thanked her and excused himself, eager to meet his cousin and learn more about the happenings on Dragonstone. He made his way to the library, looking forward to catching up with Uthor.

[rollypoliesonarock]

I don't think i ever told this story here, but even if i did, it's hilarious enough and deserves a retelling.

So last summer I left north America for the first time and went to Rome during that horrible heat wave. While there, we visited Vatican city. I was with my mom, and both of us were waiting for the start of our tour of the place. Note that neither of us are particularly religious, and we were really just there because architecture is cool, and we can say we were in another country.

So we get outside the place, and it's horribly hot outside because it's a heatwave, in Rome, in an area that isn't exactly shaded. There's a gift shop just south of Vatican city that is air conditioned, so we decide to kill some time by seeing what's in there.

Since this is a gift shop outside the Vatican, there's a lot of religious stuff in there. Again, neither of us are religious, and while looking at the stuff we might have made some comments that weren't exactly the most kind things to say. Examples including my mother saying teenage her liked rosaries because she thought they were sexy since Madonna wore them, and me laughing at these things

Despite the events about to take place, i stand my my statement in the gift shop that these are such silly statues. I would also like to note that i was not wearing the most appropriate shirt i could have. I was wearing a shirt of a little cartoon cat going through it's 9 lives, dying in horrible and ridiculous ways (like pretending to be a superhero, or trying to get a fish out of of a fishbowl) and the 9th picture shows the cat running free (stole this shirt from my dad years ago)

Anyway, we leave the gift shop a bit later. I decide we should probably find where to meet for the tour to start since i can figure out directions better than my mom (who got lost in our tiny hotel only days earlier).

Here is a map of the area, as you can see, there is not a lot of shade. Red circle is the gift shops rough location, and the green circle north of it is where an empty bench in the shade was. So we decide to sit there.

After figuring out where to meet, the two of us start talking and laughing and all that. My mom takes a picture of me, 5 seconds before disaster strikes, and i mean that in the most literal way possible

I feel something hit my shoulder, my mom looks at me and says "oh shit, literally". I look to my left shoulder in horror as I see bird poop all over my shirt.

I end up getting a new shirt in the gift shop and changing into that before the tour, so it all worked out in the end. Now as someone who doesn't believe in God, i seriously believe this was a coincidence. BUT the thought that God heard me make my comments towards the little statues in the gift shop, or was offended by my potentially inappropriate shirt i planned to wear into the capital city of the Catholic church, is infinitely more hilarious.

[lovemesomesurveys]

What name do you go by? Stephanie. 

Is that your real name or a nickname? It’s my real name.  What day of the week is it? It’s Monday and it’s also Halloween. ~spooky time~ What does that mean you have to do today? All I’m doing is ordering a pumpkin shaped pizza, eating a ton of candy, and watching scary movies.  Are you currently in the second story of a building? No, I live in a single story home.

Look past your computer screen, what's in front of you? My TV. Who was the last music artist you listened to a song by? I don’t remember at the moment.  Have you driven anywhere today? I don’t drive. Have you ever written or drew something on a dollar bill? No. Have you ever found one with a phone # on it & called it? No. If so, what happened? -- What was your favorite childhood game to play with your friends? I liked playing house.  Where did you get your favorite pet from? I only have one pet and we adopted her from a local shelter.  Have you ever called animal control on anyone? No. What are your plans for the coming weekend? I don’t have any. Who was the last person you spoke to in person? My mom. Do you prefer wearing hoodies to coats? Yeah. Is there anything written on the shirt you are wearing? Just ‘Hello Kitty.’ Do you own a tie dyed shirt? I own a few. Did you make it yourself? No. Have you ever been to another continent? Nope. Have ever had more than $500 in cash on your person at one time? Yes. Do you ever go out of your way to avoid someone? Yes. What was your last voicemail about? It was an automated one from my pharmacy. Are you currently wearing a belt? No, I don’t wear belts.  How many days is it until Christmas? 55 days.  Will it be Christmas before it is your birthday? I’ve already had my birthday this year. How much was gas the last time you looked? Like 5-something, I think.  Is there someone who would support you no matter what? My mom. Where do you see yourself in 5 years? I really don’t know. I pray it’s not the same situation I’m in now.  If you got pregnant by the last person you hugged, what would that be like? Uh, she’s my aunt.... Is there any actual chance you could be pregnant right now? There’s zero chance that I am pregnant.  Do you know how to make hemp jewelry? No. Do you still get carded when you try and buy things you're old enough to? Yeah. What was the last movie you bought? I don’t remember; I haven’t bought a movie in so long.  What was the last movie you saw in theaters? The newest Doctor Strange movie. I normally would have been several times since then, but I was in the hospital for 3 months and I’m still bedridden at home.  What was the last movie you watched by yourself? Halloween 4. Is there someone you'd drop everything for if you could see them right now? I’m able to see who I want to see right now. Do you think the drinking age in the US should be lowered to 18? No. What is your birthstone? Ruby. Do you know anyone fluent in a really uncommon language? No. Do you have any relatives who were born in another country? No. Would you rather visit Iceland for a week or Rome for a day? Iceland for a week.  Do you kiss on the first date? I would if I felt it was right and comfortable enough to do so. What was the last thing to embarrass you? Hmm. Who was the last person you rode in a vehicle with? The transportation driver.  What were you doing at this time yesterday? I was surprisingly asleep already.  What was the last thing you cooked? I haven’t cooked since May, but it was probably ramen. It’s the only thing I cook besides stuff I can easily heat up in the microwave or throw in the oven.  Do you believe most people are good people deep down? Most people, yes. Do you tend to hold grudges? No. Who was the last person to see you cry? My mom. When was the last time you slept in a bed with someone else? *shrug* When was the last time you slept in a bed not your own? During my hospital stay May-August.  When was the last time you slept on something other than a bed? I don’t know. What is in your pockets right now? I don’t have any pockets. I never use them though anyway.  What will you probably be doing at this time tomorrow? Likely the same thing. Who do you look more like, your dad or your mom? My mom. Do you get along with your parents usually? Yes. How do you feel about the last person you shared a kiss with? I don’t have romantic feelings for him anymore, but no bad feelings either. I hope he’s well.  Where is your best friend at the moment? She’s asleep. Can you tie a cherry stem with your tongue? Nope. Are you an optimist? I’m Miss Pessimist.  Describe your current mood: Right now I’m just tired. 

[woahjo]

😭😭 i forgot to answer your question from like a week ago but i’m thinking abt visiting either cali or nyc! but if i remember correctly didn’t you go to japan? i’m planning for next summer and wondering if you found it a good place to visit :))

ohhh both lovely places (i am partial to california though <3) i hope you and your friend have a lot of fun wherever u decide to go!!

also yeah I went last summer to tokyo, kyoto, and osaka!! i thought it was fantastic and had a lot of fun while i was there!! the food was delicious, people were nice, i saw some friends (which was so so wonderful), and tokyo is full of a lot of fun things to do!!

only thing about going to japan in the summer is that it is HOT. like plus 90 with 80 percent humidity, which is brutal when ur in a place like tokyo and the concrete makes it hotter. BUT even being sweaty the whole time, i rly enjoyed my trip (including the weather mishaps like getting rained on so bad our clothes were soaked through and having to take cover with a kind security guard who let us sit in his booth). fav cities were tokyo and osaka!! kyoto was great but the transit isn't as comprehensive (still leagues better than the US tho) and while the shrines were great, i think the next time i go there it will be at a time of year where walking doesn't mean dying of heatstroke LOL.

anyway, all this to say that japan is a great place to visit!! i'd def recommend learning basic phrases and stuff so you can get around and communicate easier and maybe during a cooler season. BUT the convenience stores have a lot of great ways to beat the heat either way!!

[strawnarrries]

Bunk

Summary: While joining Niall and the boys on their Where We Are tour, Niall wants you to sneak into his bunk on the tour bus.

Requested: no

POV: 2nd

Warning(s): hand stuff!!

hiya!!! ive been missing the 1d days a looooottttt recently and have had so many story ideas based during those days, so in honor of the boys 12 year anniversary, here's one of the sexier stories i've thought of! i hope you enjoy ;)

ps i'm also not completely sure about what the rules were when it came to gf's on tour but for the sake of the story, we're going to pretend that management was strict about it!

***

Are you up?

It was 1:48 in the morning when you got the text from Niall before replying back with, Yes why?

You were currently visiting Niall and the boys on their third consecutive tour, Where We Are. It was a couple hours after the show and the boys were out, each sleeping in their own bunk, inches away from you. You were in your bunk, Niall in his right above you.

Management was strict on the boys when it came to girlfriends visiting on tour. You were big distractions to them so they limited the amount of time you were able to visit. You were not allowed to go with them on tour, only allowed to visit a handful amount of times in the 6 months they were on the road, four days at a time max.

You and Niall had been dating for about a year and a half now and things couldn't be any better. Of course you have your ups and downs like every other couple, but you've learned how to work through those problems and exit out the other side happier than ever.

Long distance sucked. It was so hard. But you and Niall texted if not called each other every day you were apart. It didn't matter the timezone difference, you always made time for each other even if it was a couple small texts a day or a quick 5 minute phone call. You always dreaded the day he had to leave for tour. This year wasn't as hard as last year. Last year you were in a newer relationship, just entering the honeymoon stage and not wanting to leave his side ever. This year, while still hard, you have more love and trust in him, you know what to expect and know that you got through last tour, so you can get through this one too. And of course you know you're allowed to visit him a couple of times!

You wanna come to my bunk?

And do what

Cuddle

Kiss maybe

That's risky. What if we get caught? You know how strict they can get :(

Please

He didn't have to say anything more before you were quietly exiting your bunk and sneaking up into Niall's. As you pulled the curtain back slowly, you could point out the mischeivious grin on his face. You climbed in and snuggled up into his warm embrace under the covers, slowly closing the curtain, careful not to make any noise.

Turning on your side to face him, you mimicked his grin as you whispered low enough so only he could hear, "hi."

"Hi, pretty girl," he hummed as his arms wrapped around you, the pet name having butterflies erupt in your stomach, "'m so happy yer here wit' me. I missed ya so much."

"Me too. 'm gonna miss you when I have to leave again."

"I know, but let's not t'ink about dat right now," he pushed a stray piece of hair out from your face as he looked at you in the dark bunk, little to no light being shown, "Wanna kiss me?"

You nodded quickly before you leaned in and pressed your lips to his. A few pecks to his lips before a longer, more passionate one had you both craving more. The kisses started sweet and soft but soon picked up heat. His lips were soft against yours, his tongue moving magically in your mouth. The kisses were hot, but they were slow, both of you careful not to make them smack against each other in fear of being caught.

His hands gently caressed your back, short, bitten fingernails scratching your soft skin as he felt everywhere his hands would allow. Your fingers threaded through his unnaturally blonde locks, painted nails scratching at his scalp and playing with the dyed strands of hair.

"I love ya," he breathed out quietly.

"I love you too."

His lips were back on yours, tongue slightly grazing past your lips, his hands traveling lower and planted on your bum. He squeezed what he could grope in his hands and you wanted to moan, but kept it in. You could feel the twist in your core and your panties start to dampen at his actions.

"Lay on your back," he hummed and as he urged you to turn your body.

"We shouldn't," you whispered as you obeyed and turned your body so you were laying on your back, him still on his side next to you.

"Shhh, just lemme make ya feel good," he whispered back, sitting up on his forearm so he was hovered over you, "I miss ya. We never get any alone time here."

He was right. It was almost impossible to get any alone time with Niall while on tour. He rarely got any even when you weren't with him. The boys shared everything from rooms, to bathrooms, to even beds. Even outside of that, their constant schedule keeps everybody moving. People on every part of their team always busy with something whether it be getting ready for the shows, cleaning up after the shows, or keeping the boys in line, you are never alone.

You didn't reply, only letting your legs spread open more to allow him better access to your most vulnerable spot. After a few more kisses to his sweet lips, his lips trailed down to your jaw and neck. His calloused fingers slipped past the band of your nike shorts and your cotton panties, landing slightly to the left of your throbbing bundle of nerves. His fingers moved side to side and it felt good but he wasn't directly on your clit like you needed him to be. You reached down and grabbed on his fingers, adjusting them slightly. He continued to rub how he knows you like it and once he began to rub at that perfect angle, you had to bite your lip to keep from moaning.

His fingers moved south, feeling just how wet he's made you. Easily slipping his middle finger into you, he lifted his head from your neck and watched you react to him. He moved in and out of you curling his fingers up and feeling around. Your face contorted with pleasure. You fluttered your eyes open to look at him.

"Feels good," you hummed almost inaudibly, but he understood you.

He gave you a few kisses before slipping his index finger into the mix, his two fingers stretching you out and feeling as you clenched around him. Your breath hitched in your throat and began becoming staggered.

Continuing to thrust his fingers in and out of you, everytime he went in, he curled them up, finding the special spot that made you feeling oh so good. He paid special attention to that spot, finding it each time he went in.

You struggled not to moan. You were gripping his hair and the sheets to help relieve that struggle. He made you feel so good. He always made you feel so good. His hands were magical. Anyone can see it with how he plays that guitar on stage.

He was bringing your closer to your orgasm by the second. You both knew it wouldn't be long until he had you a struggling mess under him. The knot in your stomach was getting tighter and tighter, begging to be released.

"Gonna be quiet enough if I let ya cum?" he whispered, his breath tickling your ear.

"Please," you begged, needing the release.

He sped up his movements, careful not to make any noise, even though it was hard because you were soaked. His arm started to burn from overuse but he knew you were close and he wasn't planning on stopping. He began to press kisses and suck at all of your sweet spots again, urging you to release.

And you did.

Hard.

Your entire body erupted with pleasure, your back arching and your toes curling. Your face was scrunched up with pleasure, lips sealed tightly against each other to prevent any noise from escaping no matter how badly you wanted to scream. Your knuckles turned white from your grip on the sheets beneath you and you were seeing shapes behind your squeezed shut eyelids. You were in complete and utter bliss.

As you came down from your high, your body relaxed into the bed and Niall slowly pulled his two fingers out of you, slipping them into his mouth, sucking them clean. He laid back down next to you as you tried to maintain your heavy breathing.

"Did so well fer me," he whispered, "That feel good?"

"I wanted to scream so bad," you breathed out.

He smiled a sweet smile at you before attaching your lips together. You pulled back and closed your eyes, regaining your breath and your body. His head laid on your shoulder, hand running up and down your arm soothingly.

Once you were ready, you turned onto your side and lifted up his head to look at you. You kissed him again and reached your hand down, cupping him over his boxer briefs.

"Mm-mm," he shook his head no.

"No?" you asked confused.

"Tired, babe. Had a show tonight."

"Are you sure?" you asked, feeling selfish that he helped you out but you didn't help him.

"Mhm, got a off day tomorrow so we're checkin' into a hotel for the next two days and you've got me all to yourself then."

"Okay," you hummed, feeling the tiredness hit you as well.

You laid there in each other's arms for a bit, enjoying the euphoria and safeness it brought to you. His steady breathing in your ear, strong arms wrapped around you, and the warmth radiating off him relaxed you.

"I should go soon," you sighed, not wanting to leave his arms.

"Can we cuddle just a bit more?"

"Only 5 minutes. I can't fall asleep with you."

He didn't say anything. You turned onto your other side so he could spoon you. Getting comfortable, he pulled you into his bare chest, his arm snaking around your waist and you intertwining your fingers on top of his. He gave you a short squeeze as a silent way to say he loved you, enjoying the snuggles he's getting before you have to retreat back to your bunk. You did the same, sighing contently. Your eyelids felt heavy but you knew you had to stay up for a little longer. You decided to rest your eyes, promising yourself that you wouldn't fall asleep.

Rookie mistake, Y/N.

[writertitan]

Confinements - Pt.1

pairing: soldier!levi x f!medic!reader

themes: war themes + war crimes, enemies to lovers, mature and heavy content (minors dni), medic!reader, reader is a tough cookie due to wartimes, levi is a prisoner of war, reader and levi are snarky lil fellas, afab reader, swearing, heavy themes regarding acts of war, mentions of death, dark content, finding warmth in each other during cruel and cold-blooded times

chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 updated weekly chapter word count: 2.6k a/n: hey, hi, hello! i had one remaining request left to deliver but knew i wanted to do something very particular with it, which ended up being this mini-series fic! so fun to be writing a new levi adventure. there’s only 4 chapters, but they’ll be updated weekly because i finished all 4 prior to making its grand debut. i hope you enjoy some good ol’ war romance. :’)  based on this request

A small fire crackled steadily in front of you but it hardly did a thing to warm you. Truth be told, you couldn’t remember the last time you’d actually felt warm. An icy cold had frosted over your entire being the moment the war broke out. Then, some years ago, the cold had completely frozen your heart and soul upon the news of your brother’s death. 

The only reason you’d volunteered as a medic was to be closer to his unfortunate burial site; his entire squad had been blown to bits and there hadn’t been much of a body to return to you and your family. He’d allegedly lost most of his limbs and there was just no way to save him. 

Your country had been woefully understaffed in terms of suitable medics, so you were able to get in with your small training in midwifery and your herbalist background. You were a quick learner and the doctors and nurses had trained you to be a pretty astounding medic. Here you were, three years into your newfound career and nearly four years into this bloody war, and you’d raised in the ranks so to speak. 

These days you were mostly thrown into high trauma cases. Amputations, complex and lengthy surgeries, days and days of screaming and crying and dying. There were definitely some days you missed being a novice and dealing with simple sutures or merely prepping a soldier-turned-patient for surgery, but it felt nice to feel important, to feel like you were making a difference. Someone like you could have potentially helped your brother. You were saving lives. So why did you still feel cold inside? Why didn’t the world make sense? Why were there still dozens of new men and women being thrown towards you every single day, left for you to figure out if they would live or die? 

A day of leisure didn’t come often, but you’d made sure that today would be a personal day. 

The fire crackling in your little fireplace was just enough to heat up your tea and breakfast. It was nothing extravagant, just some porridge and chamomile tea, but that was as good as it was going to get for a long time. 

You lived with the other medics in a small camp a few miles out from the front lines. You weren’t necessarily a combat medic, meaning you didn’t get sent off into the heat of battle, but every medic needed to stay close. The makeshift hospice camp was seen as a safe zone, an unspoken rule of war, and was another half mile from your living spaces. You could see it as you looked out your window and stirred your porridge.

Even from inside, at a distance from the hospice and the front lines, you swore you could hear the ever-present yelling. At this point, you were able to tune it out, which you were especially hellbent on doing today. 

Today, you’d be sneaking off and visiting your brother’s place of death. You did it every year on the anniversary of his death. It was no longer a dangerous warzone, rather more of a husk of land. Bones, ashes, dirt, and shrapnel were the only things left there. However, it was prohibited to go to old hotspots of battle, so you’d kept it a secret. 

A knock at your door pulled you out of your thoughts and you jerked your head to the door, setting down your mug of cooling tea so you could walk over to answer it. 

“Dr. Muller,” you greeted your visitor with mild surprise, stepping aside to let him in after a brief and hollow exchange of hellos.

It wasn’t often you’d see the doctor anywhere but at the hospice camp. He was the most attentive physician by far, frequently requesting your assistance with his trauma cases. 

It was bad news that he was here. 

Your heart dropped into your stomach as he took a seat in your small living space and you took the silent cue to follow. After awkwardly taking your time in sitting across from him, he sighed and looked you in the eye for the first time, an apologetic hue coloring his gaze. 

“I know this was a personal day for you, but there’s a bit of a situation at the hospice camp,” he explained. 

Part of you groaned internally, bitter at the interruption of your personal day when it had only barely started. The other part was on high alert, waiting for further instruction. 

“What happened?” you asked, keeping your tone neutral. 

“It’s not your usual assignment, you see. But I can’t think of anyone else who would be able to resolve this. Captain Levi Ackerman is currently at the hospice camp and it’s been…difficult for him,” Dr. Muller said, clearly uncomfortable with even these vague details. His voice was hushed, as if afraid someone would hear. 

The name immediately rang a bell. 

Captain Levi was a high ranking captain and nearly legendary in his combat expertise. Everyone feared him at least a little and nobody would want to be caught in even his line of sight during a battle. The problem was that he was a captain of the army you were fighting against. 

He was your enemy. 

“We managed to take Captain Ackerman as a prisoner of war?” you asked, apparently a little too loudly, as Dr. Muller immediately hushed you.

“Yes, but quiet down,” he hissed, grey brows knit together tightly. “Only the general and his immediate subordinates and Nurse Gatha know, aside from you and me.” 

You pursed your lips together, a little miffed. As if you were the gossip; everyone knew Nurse Gatha couldn’t keep her mouth shut. 

“So what are you asking of me? Is the captain badly hurt? Should we be preparing for surgery?” 

Another unspoken rule of war: every person, no matter which side they were on, received your best efforts to save their life. 

“It’s nothing like that,” the doctor sighed. “He’s quite hurt, but it’s not fatal. It’s just that…” 

You narrowed your eyes. 

“What?” you pressed. 

“Nurse Gatha isn’t suited to help him. He’s made her run out of his room in tears three times just this morning and he’s only been here since last night. She refuses to go back in and tend to him. She says she’s terrified of the man. You’re the only person I can trust with his care, and to keep it a secret. Truthfully, I’m not so happy that the general brought Nurse Gatha into this first, but it couldn’t be helped because of your personal day.” 

“It’s not so personal anymore,” you grumbled under your breath, but sighed and rubbed a hand over your face. “Alright. I’ll go see him, then. Give me a rundown of his injuries.”

The walk back to the hospice camp was dreary. This season held nothing but rain and it was relentless. Winter had thawed, only for snow to melt into rain instead, and you could only dream of hot summer days. 

By the time you were safely back indoors and shielded from the weather once again, you were already drenched. 

You paid it no mind and tugged on your uniform before following Dr. Muller to the captain’s room, hidden away in the cellar - no doubt to hide him away from everyone else. 

You were shocked to see that even the doctor was hesitant to go inside with you. Apparently Nurse Gatha wasn’t the only one who was a little afraid. 

“Like I said, it should be simple care. I’ll leave you to it,” he said, already walking away with a wave of his hand. “See you soon!” 

You watched him leave with wide eyes, unbelieving that he would just leave you unsupervised with a prisoner of war, and a dangerous one at that, but you merely scoffed and pushed your way into the room, your entire body tense. 

“Can’t you do anything about that awful smell? This has to be a form of torture.” 

The voice belonged to none other than Captain Levi Ackerman himself and your eyes immediately landed on his slender form, chained to his bed that was pushed up against the concrete wall of the cellar. The way he spoke was quiet but his tone was mean. 

“What smell?” you asked, trying your best not to reveal your shaky voice. 

“The smell of rotting vegetables. It’s disgusting to me that you can’t even smell it,” he snapped. 

“You’ve been captured and you’re injured, but you want to complain about the smell?” 

He didn’t comment about that anymore, choosing instead to comment on your appearance. 

“And you. You look and smell like a wet dog.” 

You said nothing and raised your brow at him with a scowl on your face, taking the sight of him in. 

Captain Ackerman was of short stature, with raven hair that accentuated how pale he was. His face was angular but slender like the rest of his body. He was bruised and hurt with injuries that would have put even the best soldiers on bedrest. He had a fractured ankle and there was a nasty gash above his cheekbone that had been stitched up. Two black eyes made his grey irises stand out even more; the swelling had gone down to be able to see the unique color. And those were only the visible injuries. You knew from Dr. Muller’s rundown that there were equally worrying internal injuries. It seemed nearly impossible that this was the captain himself, but his badges showed his ranking. How could this man be Levi Ackerman? 

Any fears you’d had slipped away and you snorted a little when the captain rolled his eyes and sat up in bed, chains jingling with his movements. 

As you tried to approach him, he tried his best to lash out at you, but the chains held him back and you barely flinched. 

“I was told that your injuries weren’t that serious but that’s not quite the case. Some of your injuries, if left untreated, will send you into an early grave,” you warned. “You can fight until you’re all tired out and then I can work, or you can save us both some time and just let me take a look at you. Try to be smart and opt for the second option, please. I can also see that you’re in a lot of pain.” 

It was true. As much as he tried to hide it, you could see the way the captain clenched his jaw and tried not to move certain parts of his body. His voice was strained when he spoke. His breathing had hitched when he’d lashed out. Those broken ribs probably punished him for that little outburst. 

Captain Ackerman silently relented by going slack and scoffing at you before turning his head towards the cement wall, allowing you to get close and do what you needed to do. 

You approached him slowly, like a hunter approaching a deer, but he didn’t try to lash out again. 

When you placed a hand on his chest, he winced, cursing under his breath. 

“Make it quick,” he seethed. “I’m just glad you’re not as much of a wuss as your colleague.” 

He must have been referring to Gatha. The thought almost made you smirk. 

“Well, you certainly didn’t make her job easier,” you remarked, fingers nimbly undoing the buttons of his shirt. “You’re not very pleasant, Captain.” 

“Would you be if you were in my situation?” he snapped, though his voice was still quiet and strained as you gently prodded along his ribcage. 

You didn’t answer him, mostly because he did make a good point, but also because you were trying to make this as quick as possible. Dr. Muller promised that as soon as you finished with Captain Ackerman, you’d be free to resume the rest of your personal day. He’d even thrown in an extra one after the captain was out of your hair. 

Captain Ackerman had two broken ribs as detailed by an initial inspection from Dr. Muller, so you didn’t need to worry about wrapping or splinting. Bedrest would be the best cure for him on that front. When you inspected the nearly black bruise by his hip, you frowned to yourself. There were concerns about internal bleeding, but it was more than likely just a horrible bruise. You’d have to keep an eye on it. 

After cleaning up his stitched up wounds and applying a cold saline solution around his black eyes, you were largely done with tending to his injuries. The swelling around his ankle told you it was too soon to move it around too much.

Without a word, you rummaged around your medical kit until you found the pain medication you knew would best help the captain. You shook the vial gently before grabbing the syringe to fill with the liquid, ignoring Captain Levi’s wary looks. 

“What is that?” he finally asked, his entire body tense. 

“Pain medication,” you answered curtly, turning back to face him. “Would you like some?” 

“How do I know that’s not some lethal poison or something?” he asked, a little venom in his voice. 

You rolled your eyes and held up the syringe, raising a brow. “I’m a medic, not an assassin. It would be unprofessional of me to carry around lethal poison while I’m running around trying to keep people alive all day.” 

Some type of emotion flashed in the captain’s eyes, but it was fleeting and was gone before you could really decipher it. 

Instead of dwelling on it, you found a vein on his arm and injected him with the laudanum unceremoniously, impressed with the way he didn’t even flinch. You could see the effects of the medication take hold of him almost instantly. His body loosened up and he seemed to let out a whoosh of breath. 

“Thanks, Doc,” he grumbled. Even though it was clearly insincere or induced by the drug, you still took it positively. 

“I’m not a doctor,” was all you said, and then packed up your medical kit and moved towards the door. 

You only stopped when you heard Captain Levi clear his throat to get your attention, turning your head to look at him from over your shoulder. 

“Why are you giving me medical care? Why are you helping me get better?” he asked. It wasn’t accusatory and his tone wasn’t even all that mean this time. He seemed genuinely curious. 

“Because nobody deserves to die,” you blurted out, and then internally winced. It was how you truly felt, of course, but it felt…too honest. 

The captain seemed satisfied with the answer, however, and again a flash of some unknown emotion flickered through his eyes. This time, it tugged at your heart a little and you quickly excused yourself to let him rest. 

You ducked out of the hospice camp without being seen at the instruction of Dr. Muller, your medical kit hugged tightly to your chest as you braced yourself for the wet weather outside. For a brief moment, you remembered the captain’s insult thrown at you about looking and smelling like a wet dog, and a bitter smile made its way onto your face. You still weren’t completely dry from the first time you’d had to venture out, so it would undoubtedly be a miserable experience. 

Still, you couldn’t help but find peace in the feeling of rain spattering onto your body as you briskly walked back home. It reminded you of your brother; he’d loved the rain. You only wished it was warmer rain, if only as a blind hope that it would warm the chill inside you. 

Thoughts of Captain Ackerman were promptly pushed to the back of your head as you dried off at home and got ready for more sneaking around. 

By the time you ventured out towards your brother’s spot, the rain had stopped and had only left behind a shiver-inducing breeze. It made you sad.

_________________________________________

read pt.2 here

[mdzs-owns-my-ass-i-guess]

First writing masterpost + navigation

Hello, and welcome to my hyperfixation cave!

I'm largely known as Moma (the first four letters of my url), but you can also call me Nico! My pronouns are she/her and I'm 25 years old.

I write - a lot (it's May 29 and I have 223 pieces, rip)- but have yet to publish my work on AO3, so all my ficlets are Tumblr-exclusive.

I take requests for fluff here, and once a month I hold a 3-emoji writing event. I also occasionally ask for writing ideas.

Thank you for visiting my blog and I hope you have fun browsing!

Second writing masterpost

Third writing masterpost (last updated: 23 June 2023)

Writing tag because it takes me forever to update my masterposts: writing attempts

Other thoughts/ideas/meta/nonsense:

Novel reread

Original thots

Incorrect quotes

NSFW ideas

Paternal instincts - someone tries to hurt A-Yuan and WangXian are being murder husbands about it

What the rumors say (and what they don’t) - sequel to "Duty"

Movie scene - modern AU, very fluffy and romantic sequel to "I am here"

Shopping spree - modern AU, Wei Wuxian and the Wens go shopping and put someone in their place during it

The life we had (won't be ours again) - grief-stricken, Lan Wangji almost gives up on life. But somebody helps change his mind.

Duty - Lan Wangji is sent as tribute to convince demon king Yiling Laozu to help the cultivation world. He is successful (in more ways than one).

Unholy - WangXian modern AU based off the Sam Smith song

To build a home (a family) - the accidental Yiling Wei sect AU

Come to life - modern AU with a twist at the end, WangXian go to a Halloween party

Where do babies come from? - modern AU, the little juniors wonder where babies come from. Theories vary.

Unbearable heat - modern AU, the heating system at WangXian's apartment breaks down and they have it fixed. Poor repairman.

Let's raise a glass or two (to all the things I've lost on you) - modern AU, WangXian have a romantic dinner...?

In the cave - the cave scene but from Wei Ying's perspective

Ambitious - Mo Xuanyu crushing on WangXian, modern au

Unsent - Lan Zhan writes a love letter

Defend your honor - Lan Zhan has some wine and puts some people in their place

In cold blood - Lan Zhan saves his husband from dying

An argument changes everything - the "screaming 'i love you' while in an argument" trope with Yiling Laozu Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji desperately trying to help him

Play pretend - WangXian have a go at teacher-student role-playing. It goes... well? (sfw)

The other side - Wei Ying comforts a dying girl and very briefly talks about his time being dead

I am here - Lan Zhan receives a sad voice message from Wei Ying at 3 am and decides to do something about it

The right kind of flattery (will get you everywhere) - a Jin Guangyao character study in relation to the brothel and his manipulative ways

Flu season - Wei Ying gets the flu and is being whiny about it while Lan Zhan nurses him back to health

Closure - prequel to "Forgive me", the AU in which wangxian get together before the war and angst ensues

Mo Xuanyu's soul comes to visit Wei Wuxian and see what's been happening

Lan Xichen tells Jin Guangyao some things during the Guanyin Temple reveals

The corset - modern AU, WangXian get in an argument and Wei Wuxian decides to pull out the big guns (well, the corset).

Mind your business - Lan Jingyi is hit with a mind-reading curse and he learns things about his seniors

Your body language (speaks to me) - Wei Ying is a body language specialist analysing Lan Wangji on suspicion of several crimes. It doesn't go as planned.

WangXian are just talking and nothing bad happens, trust me

AITA for getting punched in the face? - Jin Zixuan asks r/AITA for judgement

The wedding ring - Lan Zhan comes from work to an empty apartment, Wei Ying's wedding ring on the kitchen counter and a note about moving out. Assumptions are made. Modern AU

Whatever I've done, I did it for love -Granny Wen decides she needs to protect A-Yuan

Real - Lan Zhan's life is too good to be true... or not + angst ending (added oct. 8th)

Not ours - WangXian talk about falling out of love

Not like you - JGY leaves the brothel...the brothel doesn't leave him though

Grey - modern AU, Wei Ying gets in a car accident and Lan Zhan suffers about it, with a plot twist at the end

Forgive me - JGY finds a letter in the Yiling Patriarch's notes (AU in which WangXian got together before the war)

Yu Ziyuan returns in time to "fix" everything

Sharing music - modern au, wangxian share earphones

Cynophobia - n., a pathological fear of dogs - Wei Ying tells Lan Zhan why he's so afraid of dogs

Hanguang-Jun, we shrunk Wei-qianbei! - Wei Ying goes to a nighthunt with the Lan juniors and... returns. Somewhat.

33 strikes - A look into Lan Wangji's thoughts as he receives his punishment

MDZS Social Media Headcanons

Dark Lan Sect AU in which Lan Wangji has all his memories of Wei Ying wiped clean (or does he?)

Beach days - Modern AU, Wei Ying takes A-Yuan to the beach and they meet a kind (and hot) stranger

Pictures on a page - Lan Zhan makes sure he never forgets what Wei Ying looks like after he died

Lan Zhan doesn't get Straight People Jokes™️

WangXian do NOT like spiders

A-Yuan and The Chinese tradition of giving children an anklet for protection against evil

Baby fever - Wei Ying asks his husband about having kids

Nightmares in Mo Xuanyu's body

The hat - Nie Huaisang keeps Jin Guangyao's hat as a souvenir and talks to it

Immortal WangXian modern AU Wei Ying scares some poor soul out of flirting with him

A different ending for Qin Su

An old lady predicts WangXian two decades before it happens and gets to say 'i told you so'

The Lan Sect rule against swearing

Wei Ying time travels for 10 seconds and gives himself advice

Jealousy - Wen Ning wonders why drunk Lan Wangji had a bone to pick with him and gets an honest answer

How did you first meet? - Wei Ying tells the juniors how he met his husband + Lan Jingyi had suspicious romantic trope knowledge

Lan Zhan may be a cougar

The juniors get drunk and ponder about Jin Ling's uncles

Lan Wangji's grieving

Rainfall - Wei Ying's memories with rainy weather

Lan Zhan talks to Wei Ying about his scars after being offered to have them removed

The Bunny Tradition in the Lan sect

Syrup - AU in which A-Yuan dies and Lan Wangji has to cope with the deaths of two people he loves

Lan Xichen welcomes Wei Ying into the family with a special gift

Wei Ying dreams of his future while still in the Burial Mounds

Xue Yang talks to Xiao Xingchen

Qin Su realizes something is wrong

Wei Ying thinks about Mo Xuanyu and his death day

Jin Ling dreams of his parents

Sizhui and his memories

Wei Ying's promise to always return home from nighthunts

Dark! Lan Wangji in an AU in which Wei Ying dies in the Xuanwu Cave

Wei Ying gives life lessons on fear to the Lan juniors

AU in which Mo Xuanyu was not only evil but also able to take over his body and kick Wei Ying out

Wei Ying thinks about the 13 years he was dead

Nie Huaisang takes full and proud accountability for Guanyin Temple while it's still happening

Instead of having Lan Xichen do it, Nie Huaisang stabs Jin Guangyao himself and has an evil speech about it

Mo Xuanyu receives thanks for his sacrifice

Wei Ying and his birthdays

Lan Wangji's mornings

WangXian talk about scars...again

Lan Xichen hears the fresh gossip after Jin Guangyao's death

Lan Xichen learns to love and trust again

Jin Guangyao hears from Meng Yao and neither are happy about it

Wei Ying visits Lan Zhan the night he dies

Mo Xuanyu's body still remembers him

[dilfslover0003998]

welcome home

▸ pairings: step brother!oikawa tōru x f!reader

▸ warnings: dark content! use of “nii-chan”, dumbification, manipulation, unprotected sex, choking, oral fixation, praise, begging, aftercare, crying during sex, dacryphilia, fem pronouns + fem body descriptions

▸ summary: your step brother comes home from Brazil with only one thing on his mind!! (1.9k words)

▸ a/n: this isn’t a representation of a healthy relationship between step siblings, nor should it be followed as such!! this is pure fiction, and not based off of real life situations. 18+ content!! minors dni!!!

SEND ASKS HERE!

You were so excited. It was very occasional when your step-brother visited home from Brazil, and whenever he did, he brought tons of foreign treats and presents that’d keep you busy until he was done with your parents and had time just for you and him.

You tried cleaning your already spotless house, you tried reorganizing your room, you tried folding and refolding laundry, but the day dragged on as you waited for a knock at the door. Then, unknowingly, as you stared up at your ceiling while laying in your bed, you’d drifted off to sleep.

When you awoke, it was to a gentle but calloused hand shaking your shoulder and calling out your name in a playful, amused whisper. When your eyes cracked open and you saw a mess of brown hair, you instantly sat up and gasped, wrapping your arms around his shoulders before he could even react.

“Nii-chan!” you squealed, pushing against him so hard that he fell onto his back. “I missed you so much! How was your flight? Did you bring me more of that weird candy you did last time?”

“Whoa–slow down,” he chuckled, lightly brushing his palm against the back of your head. “I’ll answer everything soon, okay? But for now, you know what I want, don’t you?”

You pulled back and looked up at him through your lashes, your cheeks already heating with a blush. You looked down at your lap and picked at your pretty acrylic nails that you got just to impress him. “Yeah,” you said, voice low and soothing to his ears.

God, he missed you, probably even more than you missed him. But, there you were, sitting on your calves with a pretty white skirt and sweater covering what he’d been dying to see since the last time he left you in Japan. Your cheeks were flushed, your hair was hiding parts of your face, and your eyes–shit, your eyes–were already teary from his teasing tone and light touches. He needed you.

“Then go on, princess,” he encouraged, brushing some of your hair behind your ear and pulling you by your chin to look up at him again. “I missed you too, you know? Let me prove it to you?”

You nodded without a moment’s hesitation and pressed your pretty soft lips to his. Oikawa’s large hands, roughened by the years of playing volleyball, came up to pull your hips into his lap. When you were comfortably seated on his thighs, he could feel the warmth of your cunt pressing against his crotch, and he groaned into the tight seal of your mouth.

You gently scraped your nails against the back of his neck and sucked him in closer, body consuming your thoughts. You were already emotionally stimulated by your step-brother’s return, and pairing that with the physical stimulation of his jeans-covered cock, you were practically a goner, whimpering and whining at every little brush of his fingertips against your warm skin.

“You’re so sensitive today,” he mumbled against your lips before he moved his mouth to latch onto your neck and suck a pretty purple bruise into your skin. “Is there any reason why?”

“Y-you know there is,” you whined at his teasing. “‘s cus you’re home, nii-chan… my body missed you too, y’know?”

He smirked against you before leaning back and just holding your hips steady on his. “Yeah? Where did it miss me the most, princess? Right here?” He trailed his fingers to under your skirt, gently tracing little circles into your thighs. You shook your head, hips twitching forward.

“No, nii-chan,” you grabbed his wrist and tried to stop, but he sent you a gaze that could only be interpreted as a warning.

“Here?” he continued, fingers finding themselves rubbing against your tummy. You arched into his hand, begging for more of his attention. “Or is it here?”

His hand went between your breasts and circled your neck, holding your forehead against his as you panted into his open mouth, not expecting a sloppy, open-mouthed kiss. “Or right here?”

You moaned when his other palm cupped your entire cunt, fingers dampening from your panties that were soaked. “Right there!” you cried, humping his hand despite knowing it’d only tick him off.

You were proved to be right when he clicked his tongue and pulled his hands away. “That’s so cute, princess,” he teased, poking your nose playfully. “But, your mom and my dad are waiting for us to come downstairs for our dinner reservations. So why don’t you get all dressed up and let your nii-chan treat you to something good to eat, hm?”

Your heartbroken, teary-eyed stare nearly made him snap. Your hands were sweaty as they grabbed at his shirt. “N-no… nii-chan, no! I thought… you said you missed me! That you want–wanted to show me how much!”

He adored the little hiccups in your voice as you tried not to break down and cry in front of him. He knew you liked to play strong. “I just wanted a kiss, baby, that’s all,” he wiped the stray tear that fell down your cheek. “Did my little girl misunderstand me? Is that it?”

“But…” you didn’t know what to say. Your heart was beating wildly in your chest. Was that what Oikawa really meant? Did you just misunderstand? Your mouth opened and closed as you tried to figure out what to say.

He sighed, almost like he was disappointed, then hugged you to his chest and smiled when you inhaled his scent and melted in his arms. “Oh, poor girl. I know it’s tough, being as cute and dumb as you are. There’s no need to cry, though, okay? Do you want nii-chan to take care of you before dinner? It’ll have to be quick, so I can’t promise it won’t hurt or that I’ll be gentle.”

Oikawa knew he’d won when your eyes lit up, and you looked at him like he was the only star in the sky. “Please,” you asked, pathetically sniffling and wiping your eyes. Mascara ran down your cheeks, and he nearly came at the sight alone.

“Alright, baby, take your pretty skirt off and lay back on the bed, okay? I’ll take care of you real quick so we can still make it to our reservations,” he mumbled, placing you to the side and watching you strip as he yanked his jeans down enough for his boxers to show just how affected he was by all of this in the form of a wet spot right where the head of his cock lied.

“Greedy little girl, you’re willing to make our parents wait so you can get your tiny cunt stuffed? Are you that obsessed with your nii-chan’s cock, hm?” he teased, pulling you onto the bed and kneeling between your spread, slick thighs. You nodded your head, sticking your tongue out in need of something to suck on.

Three of his fingers shoved down your throat the second he thrust his clothed cock into your drippy cunt. “Jesus, you’re so wet. I bet it won’t hurt, even without prep.”

You moaned, your hips moving against your will as he continued to soak his boxers in your precum. “Please,” you mumbled around his fingers, begging him to just fuck you already.

“Alright, alright–shhh,” he whispered, kissing your forehead gently as he managed to push his underwear down to his thighs. “Be a good girl and swallow my cock up with your messy cunt, yeah?”

With that, and a little lining up, he shoved himself all the way in with a grunt. Before you could even react, he was already pulling back out. He really was giving you no time at all. Finally, the dam holding back your tears broke, and you sobbed loudly around his fingers as he ruthlessly fucked into you.

“Be quiet,” he chastised while his other hand curled around your neck once again. He squeezed this time, trying to shut you up as much as he could so your parents wouldn’t hear. “Does that feel good, baby? I bet it does; you look so stupid and fucked out already. My pathetic pretty girl, this was all you wanted, wasn’t it? The entire time I was in Brazil, I bet you thought about my cock pounding into you like this, isn’t that right?”

You choked as the tips of his fingers tickled the back of your throat, but you were determined to contribute to his pleasure in some way, so you rolled your hips to meet his thrusts, missing the tempo half the time but loving the small moans that you pulled from him.

“That’s it, you’re a good fucking girl,” he groaned, letting go of your neck in favor of pressing two fingers to your clit. “You’re so messy, angel. Drooling around my fingers, all down the front of you, and creaming yourself on my cock. Do you like this? Is this what you wanted? Go ahead, answer.”

You barely processed the demand as his fingers pulled from your mouth, and you instantly let out a loud cry of pleasure as his tip hit your most sensitive spot. “Nii-chan!” you yelled, immediately getting silenced once again with his palm covering your lips.

“You little brat,” he teased, not being able to help the smirk that appeared on his face. “Are you so fucked stupid that you can’t even follow simple directions? Answer me, quietly, or I’ll make you regret it.”

You nodded your head, but you figured you’d promise anything just to have him keep hitting your g-spot the way he was. “L-love it, nii-chan! Love your cock fillin’ me up! W-want more, please! This is all–all I thought ‘bout!”

“All you thought about? When?” he asked, grabbing your jaw between his fingers as your tears tracked your mascara down his hand. “When it was your hand playing with your little clit, and not mine? When you shoved a toy in your cunt instead of my cock? Was that when?”

“Yes!” you tried keeping your voice down, but you were starting to see white, and you were on the verge of release. “W-when I touched myself, ‘n when I was doing normal t-things too! Like when I ate or–or went to lectures! Couldn’t help myself but lie to the professor when h-he caught me touching myself for you! Told him I had cramps!”

Oikawa moaned at your words, only thrusting into you harder. “Cum, baby. You missed it so much, didn’t you? Missed my cock so much that you got off inside that prestigious little college you got into? What would the recruits and your mom say? Knowing their filthy little girl is more focused on her step-brothers cock than her lessons?”

You screamed into his neck, allowing yourself to get off at his words. Then, when he felt your walls fluttering around his cock, he couldn’t help but follow you and fill you up with his cum. “Fuck! There we go,” he bit into your shoulder, enjoying the feeling of marking you up as his.

It took a few minutes to come down from his high, and when he did, he noticed your glazed-over eyes and faraway stare. He smiled, kissing your puffy lips gently.

When you came to, you were cozied up against Oikawa’s chest, his hands playing with your hair. “Hi, baby,” you heard.

“Hi,” you looked up at him. “What happened? Why didn’t you wake? What about the reservations?”

He cooed at how cute you looked, worried about his plans. “I pushed them back a little bit. Let’s get you in the bath, okay? Then we can worry about all of that.”

“Yeah,” you giggled, letting your head fall back into his chest comfortably. “Thank you, nii-chan.”

[i-luvsang]

., # bad luck — huang renjun

¿ ｡′ gn!reader, highschool!au, fluff, tw: none, though lmk if i missed something, wc: 1.2K ！！ ** currently working on how to use the read more function without it messing up my text, so i apologize if i’m clogging up your dash with this :,)

you let out another huff of annoyance as you grab what seems like the millionth handful of discarded worksheets from the ground and shove them angrily into the recycling bin sitting in the corner. glaring at the vast expanse of scattered papers which blanket the school stairwell, they seem to taunt you with the task you know you have no choice to complete. when you ran for student body president at the beginning of the year, this was not what you signed up for; your whole grade had permanently escaped from this hellhole nearly half an hour ago, finally done with their last year of high school. and here you stand, stuck in the hallway, picking up after your classmates who had tossed hundreds of their papers over the railing in celebration of graduating.

and while, truly, you share the joy and relief of finally being done with this place, all you can register right now is a sense of raging annoyance and injustice because you, after slaving away to create the best senior year for everyone else, are cleaning up their stupid math worksheets, and probably will be for at least another 30 minutes. you could be at the cafe you've been dying to visit for two months now, maybe rushing off to the pool, or even better, laying in bed for some well-deserved rest.

gosh, at least i never have to do this again. you think, sighing as you toss another packet of calculus problems into the overflowing bin and recall the option to take an easier math course next year.

too overwhelmed by your own self-pity to continue, you slide down the wall and onto the floor, picking up the paper that's trapped between your hand and the tile and examining it out of boredom. you flip it over to see the front to see if you recognize the name.

na jaemin. you never knew him well, but he always seemed quite sweet. it's odd to think you'll probably never see ninety percent of these kids again. not that you truly mind, many of them you were glad to have out of your life.

unwilling for the moment to empty out the recycling bin into the larger one sitting outside of the stairwell, you let jaemin's paper slip out of your hand and drift back onto the floor. you reach for another sheet, your eyes immediately being drawn to the simple, but evidently skilled sketches filling in the margins. you let your eyes drift from the drawings to the name at the top of the paper, barely suppressing the giggle that bubbles up in your throat as you read it.

"huang renjun," you mumble aloud. the artsy boy in your literature class who seemed too attractive and funny to be true. or alternatively titled, the boy you couldn't stop stealing glances at all year long, who made your cheeks flush with heat when he mumbled a low apology in your ear after bumping into you in the hallway, and the only boy who had caught your attention during your four years in this place (disregarding the two second crush you had on lee jeno, because that was something nearly every single kid experienced during their time here).

it only takes the one swift motion of turning the paper over to send your mind into a mess of confusion and your heart into rapid palpitations. you had expected more drawings but not … this.

because filling the empty lower half of the page is an unmistakable rendition of you. staring in disbelief at the unfairly well drawn portrait of your very own face, you place a hand over your heart, scolding yourself to not jump to conclusions. this doesn't mean anything, right? he was probably just bored and practicing. you sigh, letting the paper float back to the ground. that must be it.. you think, more disappointed by your conclusion than you feel you should be.

but not even seconds later, you fail in suppressing your hope and snatch the paper back up, folding it carefully and slipping it into your pocket. then, rather shamelessly due to the lack of personnel in the building, you get down on all fours, sifting carefully through the papers littering the floor in hopes of finding another page with his name on it.

"gosh, please let there be something.. if i really go throughout my whole entire high school career without an ounce of romance, i may throw up," you mutter angrily to yourself. you nearly shout in joy when you find his name atop a packet, then restrain a curse because it's a history paper rather than one from literature. but in your desperation for at least a glimpse of (at this point, tragic) high school love, you continue your search, probably looking like a maniac as you snatch papers off the ground, then throw them behind you without bothering to put them in the bin and actually do your job. then finally, you come across a whole, though slightly scattered, stack of papers that belong to him. you quickly dismiss the first several pages, as they don't belong to the one class you shared.

you can't help the strangled screech that forces its way out of your mouth as you flip through the abundant papers accumulated throughout the literature course. they don't appear on every single one, but the light sketches of your face show up far more than enough times for it to be "just practice."

but it doesn't take long for your smile to drop when you remember. you're probably never going see his stupidly pretty face again.

"ugh, i take it back, this is worse than nothing," you mumble disappointedly, because now it's over before anything even started. you wrack your brain for ways to reach him again without seeming like a total weirdo.

'hey renjun! it's that random kid from your literature class! i found your drawings of me :)) wanna exchange numbers'

yeah, not something anyone would want to find in their instagram message requests.

gosh, y/n, your luck really is this bad, you think to yourself. you fold up a few more papers which contain your portrait and stick them with the first one, then reluctantly pitch the rest. clearly unable to hold any more, a few pages flutter out of the bin, so you begrudgingly pick it up and make your way back into the hallway where the bigger can awaits you. dumping the weight out, you look down the empty hall. by this time, most of the teachers have eagerly left, and many classroom lights are off. the light peeking into the dimmed corridor from the last door on this floor catches your attention. the art room. an impossible hope blooms in your chest as you recall the countless times that you passed renjun in the art room after student council meetings, long after school ended.

it's the first day of summer. who in the world would stay this long after school regardless of their normal habit of doing so? you reason with yourself. but even as you say these words in your head, you set the smaller recycling can down and start making your way down the hallway. you almost chicken out halfway there, but you push through, hesitating slightly before stepping into the open doorway.

and you swear it's a hallucination when that soft pair of eyes meets yours and you see the face you would have most regretted not seeing again.

"hi…"

[foster-the-world]

Nonstop

I've been studying nonstop since I bombed my last exam. Five final tests to go. One today. My eyes are fried and I still have nine days of full time studying. It helped that the heat finally broke so I was able to enjoy a pre study walk this morning. Whenever I start to feel like I'm getting the material I realize there is so much more I don't know. They put both pediatric nursing and labor/delivery in the same course. It's way too much information and no wonder infant/mother mortality numbers are where they are at in this country. Pre-eclampsia and postpartum hemorrhage are the main reasons black women in this country are dying at such alarming rates during childbirth. The extent of acknowledging that was mentioning in passing that African American women are at a higher risk for these two conditions. No mention of how, why what can be done differently or (most importantly to get the point across) how bad it is.

Yesterday Bee got mad at Rebel (rightfully - as mentioned she's difficult nowadays) and said she's not my real sister. I'm not sure how to handle that. I'm going to ask my adopted parent group for advice. So far, I've countered with something along the lines of "she is but its okay to be really frustrated with her. Having a sister can be really hard." I don't want to dismiss her feelings but also don't want her to say hurtful things when she's upset. She's also made comments about her real Mom or her real cousins but not at times of anger. Thus far, I've ignore the "real" portion and address whatever topic she brings up. I'd be annoyed if Rebel ever said Bee wasn't her real sister. I don't want Bee to get away with things because she's adopted while also acknowledging her complicated feelings/confusion/etc.

Thinking of booking a Disney cruise for October and surprising the girls the morning of. It leaves from NYC and is five days. It's cheaper then I would have guessed. $850 including taxes/fee a person with all food, etc included. Which feels like a deal considering flights to Bermuda are $300-$400 a person. It spends two days in Bermuda but we are mostly in it for the on boat stuff. We'd skip the off boat excursions and hang at the beach. At first I thought the whole family could go but my husband doesn't have the vacation days and baby boy would not do well sleeping in a room with all of us. Plus, they have some strict rules about no diapers in the pool and even some splash pad areas. My Mom may join. The girls would miss three days of school but not worried about that at all.

This trip can only happen if the house sale goes through. Not happy we now have to wait for September for that to happen. The people who are buying our house are also bought the rental company that manages our house. Which meant they could also throw in no commission on the July/August rentals when they asked us to extend the sale. Which is a nice bonus. I'm dying to know how much they paid. It's a successful business with very little overhead - a website and an employee or two + a team of cleaners. They charge 25% of the rental income to the home owners and way over charge for all of the rental rates.

Baby boy court on Friday. Send out good vibes that something moves forward. He had his two year well visit yesterday. She wasn't worried about his eczema - even though I think it looks terrible right now. 99% for height and 80% for weight. She said he'll def be "well over 6 ft." I learned in nursing school if you double the 2 year old height you will get a rough estimate of their adult height. As of today that would put him at 6.2. They don't mention if its the beginning of being two or the end???

Back to burning my eyes out with studying.

[bots-and-cons]

So school... and other stuff

This is just a bit of a rant post, so you guys can just ignore this if you’re not in the mood to read my ramblings. Requests are gonna be open sometime later this week, but I’ll make a separate post about that when it’s time.

I took the exam or whatever to get to college about a month ago, and the results are here. I didn’t get in. The best backup spot I’m on is 32, so basically the whole class would have to cancel or take a spot at another school for me to get in and that’s not gonna happen. But on the bright side I got 8 more points than last time so if I can improve my score by that much the next time too, I’d be pretty much guaranteed to get in.

I’m not super depressed about it or anything, I just like to complain. It’s my own fault for not preparing enough and some of the choices I made in the exam itself. For right answers you get points, obviously. For wrong answer you get points deducted and if you choose to not answer you don’t get points but they aren’t deducted from your total either. So what I did is that I answered every question even when I wasn’t sure, and that probably cost me some points since I should’ve just chosen the “not answering” option. I hope to do better next time, and I’ll start studying earlier for the next time the exam comes around

My younger brother E has officially moved out of the apartment we used to share. His address was still here for the last year even though he didn’t live here, because his school requires him to have an address in his home town since he lives in the dorms during school. Now he’s working and he changed his address to our dad’s place. So now my other younger brother T has decided to sort of move in with me, or a very long time visit might be a better term. He’s gonna be here for most of the summer, but not all of it.

I’ve promised to babysit my little sister for some time next month, probably about a week or a bit more, depends how many relatives want to take her first. My bday is also coming up on July 12th, but I’m not really planning on doing anything special, maybe just to see a friend. I’m not big on alcohol or anything, and I can’t really even drink because of my anti-psychotic and anti-depressant medications.

It’s been so freaking hot here for the last four days, almost 30C everyday, and it’s supposed to continue for at least a week. I’m basically dying in this heat since I’m definitely not used to it. Working out is also a freaking nightmare, but I’ll manage, even though I feel like I’m melting all the time.

Thanks if you read :D