#last season was a biiiit of a mess

[minttobe-treehill]

i miss bonnie winterbottom. she’s a bitch and i hate her but i do miss her

[heretherebedork]

The Battle is back! And the Pining is back too! This time, the contestants are reshuffled and you, will decide who pines better and meets your standard. And the contestants are:

Kongpob vs. Bbomb

Mhok vs. Fiat

Kaeng vs. Mon

Kurosawa vs. Na

Third vs. Aey

Un vs. Chon

Mark vs. Pok

Puth vs. Tue

Kim Taehyung (Ryu's Wedding) vs. Sanha (Mr. Heart)

Pete (DBK) vs. Tann

Sarawat vs. Cairo

Mork vs. Fighter

Haoting vs. YongJie

Mek vs. Wayo (2moons2)

Forth vs. Thanu

Tri vs. Prab

Yu Hao (CTL) vs. Lichen

Shide vs. Nubsib

Ae vs. Tew (SOTUS S)

Kao (Oxygen) vs. Solo

Ming (2moons2) vs. Tum

Mes vs. In (UWMA)

Ram vs. Boss

Jedi (Close Friend) vs. Zon

Blue vs. Team (Y-Destiny)

Pi vs. Tsuge

Yeon Woo (Color Rush) vs. Jack (Trapped)

Man vs. Shin (3willbeFree)

Kang Gook vs. Ryu Ho Seon (Ryu's Wedding)

Tin vs. Kengkla

Mark (En of Love) vs. Wayu (Gen Y)

Phai (Gen Y) vs. Hin (LBC2)

Goodluck!!

Kongpob vs. Bbomb

This is a cruel, cruel choice. I love both of these boys so much and they have such similar stories and they work so well in their shows and I just love them so much. But I had to go with Kongpob in the end because, honestly, he had more room to pine because he's had so much more show to work with. But Bbomb is catching up quick with this last episode.

Mhok vs. Fiat

Fiat is just so good at pining. I just can't. Mhok got better in the special but he wasn't a good piner before that. He was much more toxic then Fiat ever was because Fiat was just going to hide away and never, ever talk about his feelings instead. So Fiat has to win. I love a piner who's willing to pine themselves away.

Kaeng vs. Mon

How do I choose?!? They're both so different at pining and so adorable and I love them both deeply in their own way. I think I have to go with Kaeng based on my four pillars of pining because he really does the best of filling them... sort of? They're both adorable, damnit.

Kurosawa vs. Na

Sorry, Na. Love you! But Kurosawa pretty much always wins. I cannot deny him anything. He always wins because he's the cutest and the softest and the most loving ever. So he wins without hesitation. Sorry! Love Na, though.

Third vs. Aey

This was hard but for the opposite reason of most of the others. Ugh. I went with Third because, I mean, pining? All the boy did was pine and cry in showers uselessly. Aey might have been pining but he was also too severely damaged to really pine in an enjoyable or healthy way.

Un vs. Chon

DAMN. This choice is interesting. I really do like Un's small and soft pining. But Chon. CHON. I love Chon so much and his tiny relationship trajectory and his adorableness. Plus, his pining is just fantastic.

Mark vs. Pok

Mark went more with pursuit than pining so I'm gonna give this to Pok. Pok gets to fuck Tong AND pine and it's absolutely fascinating honestly. I love him. Please let Gen Y season 2 exist sooner rather than later. I just want more of their mess!

Puth vs. Tue

... This is a rough choice because, honestly, I'm not sure how good either of their pining is. I went with Puth because he was pretty cute with Payu but it was still barely pining, honestly. And Tue is just... man, they were basically together in like 5 minutes y'all.

Kim Taehyung (Ryu's Wedding) vs. Sanha (Mr. Heart)

I gotta give it to Sanha. That boy's the happiest piner I've ever seen and he deserved all the joy in the world when he finally got his man. Taehyung was adorable and historical himbo beauty and he really was grand... but Sanha, yo, Sanha.

Pete (DBK) vs. Tann

Gotta give it to Tann. I gotta! He met him in university, never said anything and then managed to fall into him a second time. And got his adorable happy ending but with the perfect drama. Love a man who gets his man.

Sarawat vs. Cairo

I just don't like Sarawat that much. I also don't buy his pining. Sorry, y'all. Cairo was at least cute and I believed all of his emotions and all his feelings and his wants and needs and such. But Wat? Nope.

Mork vs. Fighter

No one loses to Mork. No one, ever, loses to Mork. It's impossible to lose a pining battle to a cardboard cutout. I would pick a character I didn't know over Mork. But I don't have to because I got Fighter! And I love Fighter! And Fighter's relationship with Tutor and his desperate pining and his need to get closer while still avoiding his feelings at all cost... I love him so much.

Haoting vs. YongJie

I am going with HaoTing despite my poor memory re: MODC because I remember adoring him and, frankly, YongJie made a better pursuer than piner because he was going to Get What He Wanted no matter what.

Mek vs. Wayo (2moons2)

I love Mek. I love Mek more than I should ever be allowed. Mek wins. Mek wins and I will miss him forever and ever and ever and ever and I love him. Sorry, Wayo. Also, Wayo, you're just a biiiit too much for my taste in the useless department. Sorry.

Forth vs. Thanu

Thanu can go to hell. At least Forth was cute and ended up happy. Thanu is just obnoxious.

Tri vs. Prab The Twins (Mab and Mob)

Ughhhhhh, do I have to chose? They both suck. The twins were the best piners in Brothers. So I declare them the winners instead! Sorry. Twins win!!!

Yu Hao (CTL) vs. Lichen

This one is close. But Lichen's soft and sad acceptance that he was just going to pine after Muren wins this for me. Yu Hao was adorable and wonderful, no denials. But Lichen's soft acceptance of his rejection? Was so good.

Shide vs. Nubsib

Another hard one! I wnet with ShiDe because his pining included a willingness to never have anything while Nubsib was like 'mine, this is going to be MINE and I will never give it up'. And I love pining that's willing to be unreciprocated.

Ae vs. Tew (SOTUS S)

I had to do Ae because, honestly, I don't remember Tew at all. SOTUS S is on my rewatch list for summer, okay? Promise! Also I love Ae and his feral demisexuality.

Kao (Oxygen) vs. Solo

I had to go with Kao. Kao's pining and pursuit are my favorite in the show. He learns to love bunnies! Come on! Solo was adorable and I love him and Gui deeply but Kao and Phu became my favorite.

Ming (2moons2) vs. Tum

Ming wins. Mings so hard it almost hurts. I love Ming, I love MingKit, I love boys who can melt a tsundere heart and I love a melted tsundere so much it almost hurts. Plus, Ming does a great job of pining and flirting.

Mes vs. In (UWMA)

In is not a piner. In is the opposite of a piner. In does not pine. In walks up to a guy everyone says is dangerous and asks him out on a date. Anyone wins over In because In doesn't pine. But Mes is also adorable.

Ram vs. Boss

This one is hard. I don't actually consider Boss to be a good piner. I feel like he missed the mark, especially in comparision to Mek. But Ram also isn't the most pining of characters. Though he definitely does better than Boss. So Ram it is!

Jedi (Close Friend) vs. Zon

I had to go with Jedi because Zon is more pursued than pining. He does do some, no denial. But Jedi is the best and adorable about his whole pining and every time he sees Ray he turns into a tiny incoherent creature of nothing but want and need. Love. LOVE>

Blue vs. Team (Y-Destiny)

I miss Blue. I wish we'd gotten a special for that couple as well as the SaifanZon special, honestly. Because they deserved so much better than COVID gave them. Also, Team

Pi vs. Tsuge

Tsuge wins. He was so adorable and useless. Just adorable. And his love of cats and delivery boys and awkwardness and the fact that, in the end, he learned how to communicate... I love him so much, okay?

Yeon Woo (Color Rush) vs. Jack (Trapped)

Gotta go with Color Rush every time. Jack is adorable but Yeon Woo wins all pining wars. Ugh, the pining in that show. So good. Such a god show.

Man vs. Shin (3willbeFree)

Nearly impossible choice. But I love and miss Shin, okay? He deserves this. He was so soft and so in love and so unsure and he deserved in in every way.

Kang Gook vs. Ryu Ho Seon (Ryu's Wedding)

I gotta give it to Kang Gook. He was willing to give up so much and so willing to just keep going and just... yeah. Sorry. I gotta give it to him.

Tin vs. Kengkla

KENGKLA IS CANCELED FOREVER. Tin wins because he is both adorable and absolutely useless. I mean, breaking Can's phone just to get his phone number? SO GOOD. So stupid. I love it so much. Also, Kengkla can burn in hell.

Mark (En of Love) vs. Wayu (Gen Y)

This was hard. But I had to go with Wayu. I just... I had to give this to him, okay? He's cute and he's soft and he might be useless and their relationship was never that great but like... he's cute? And healthier than Mark. I dunno, I never loved Mark.

Phai (Gen Y) vs. Hin (LBC2)

This one was rough. But I gotta give to Hin. I mean, damn. DAMN. I love Hin. And I love his story. And Phai just ended up in such a mess... Oof. At least Hin came to his adorable pining senses.

[whyamiinopmhellagain]

Ebina Misaki, One Punch Man OC!

I wanted to move her, so I did!

General

Full Name (Last, then First): Ebina ((蛯名), Misaki (美咲)

Meaning: Beauty Bloom

Nickname(s): Angel. Miss Optimist.

Reason for nickname(s): Her singing voice, and angelic personality. Her optimism.  

Given By: Her parents. Her classmates.

Age: 18 

Sex: Female

Gender: Female

Place of Birth: City Y

Birthday: 3/3

Currently living in: City Y

Species/Race: Human

Ethnicity: Japanese

Blood Type: B

Occupation: Student, cover artist

Sexual Orientation: Straight

Social Status: Middle Class

Relationship Status: Single

Status: Alive

Appearance

Body Build: Skinny and flat, like a bean pole.

Height: 1.91 meters (6’3”)

Skin colour: Pale

Hair style: Chin bob with bangs

Hair colour: Black

Eye colour: Brown

Distinguishing Features: Longer than average arms, smaller breasts.

Preferred Clothing: Deep blue t-shirts, long, black skater skirts, knee high socks, sneakers, backwards baseball caps.

Accessories: Black frame glasses.

Health

General health: Good, but needs glasses, because she’s nearsighted.

Posture: Good

Any physical illnesses?: No

Any mental illnesses?: No

Take drugs?: No

Smoke?: No

Mental/Emotional State

Archetype: ENFP-A (Campaigner)

Mental age: 23-28

Act before thinking/Think before acting?: A bit of both, depends on the situation.

Emotion-wise, generally: Pretty happy, overall!

Conversation

Way of speaking: Speaks at a normal volume and is very polite, until you get closer to her, then she becomes a bit more sarcastic and playful. She also gets a biiiit louder. Loves to talk.

Common conversation starter: Do you listen to…?

Swears?: Rarely, around her close friends.

Made-up words?: No

Made-up language?: No

Likes/Dislikes

Likes: Music, yoga, her friends, playing her instruments, makeup, singing, her fans/followers, social media, parties, making new friends, her parents, and her cram school teachers.

Dislikes: Her haters and trolls, doctor’s appointments, pretty much every academic class (except biology), and places with no service/wifi.

Hobbies

Playing/listening to music.

Browsing the internet

Interacting with her fans

Talking to people/going to parties

Going to get crepes

Doing her makeup

Skills/Abilities

Singing skills (Soprano, prefer higher notes, but can hit some lower ones in an alto range.)

Piano (Since she was 6)

Guitar (Since she was 8)

Drums (Since she was 13)

Songwriting (taken a few classes on it, written two songs, plans to write more.)

How to set up and use recording equipment.

Video editing skills.

How to take good insta selfies and write witty tweets, when needed.

Education/Intelligence

Education: Currently in High School with average grades (B’s and B-’s, except in her music classes), and a music cram school, where she is one of the best students there. She’s had pretty standard education through her life.

IQ: Pretty average (I don’t know the exact number for either.)

EQ: Higher than average.

Secrets

She wishes she was a little shorter and curvier, like a regular person, so she could be seen as “beautiful”. (Even though she already is.)

Thinks her biology teacher is hot.

Fears

That her friends will leave her.

That she’ll go deaf.

That her channel will fall apart

That a monster will destroy her and/or anything she cares about.

Dreams/Goals

To grow her channel. (She wants to hit at least 10,000 subscribers)

Write, publish and perform more songs.

Graduate high school and college

Get married.

Favorites

Food: Caramel fudge chocolate chip brownies!  

Colour: Royal Blue.

Animal: Snakes!

Holiday: New Year’s Eve.

Season: Spring.

Time of day: Dawn.

Thing to watch: Concerts.

Movie: “Pitch Perfect”

Show: “Meteor Garden”

Type of art: Music.

Genre of music: Too many, but Jazz, Classical and Metal to name a few.

Genre of literature: Not really a book person.

Genre of shows: Comedies

Genre of movies: Musicals

History

Misaki was adopted by her mothers when she was 6 months old. She was always a bit taller than everyone else, which caused her to be made fun of by the other kids. But, her bubbly personality made her more friends than enemies. She comes from a musical family, her free time mostly went to learning music with her moms. She was very chatty when she was younger, and enjoyed talking to new classmates, and playing with other kids. She also loved to show off her skills in music, and didn’t really care if she messed up. She started sharing her talents and skills with the world when she was 16, she started posting covers online, and she has been devoted to the channel ever since. But, as cool as it is to have a lot of friends, and even fans, she’s beginning to feel a bit lovesick, and wants someone to hold her at night.

Personality

Misaki is a woman dedicated to her dreams and future, her family, her future spouse and her friends, in that order. She enjoys being around other people, and LOVES to talk. She is always looking for the best in people, and the silver lining, even in the darkest storms. She likes to go to parties, but not to be bad, because she enjoys the company of other people. Music is Misaki’s life. She could sit for hours listening to her favorite songs, and spend hours more playing them. She’d rather listen to music than socialize, but she will get lonely eventually. She always gives second chances, even if some would say it’s undeserving. She loves to always busy herself with doing something, whether it be doing some yoga, learning a new make-up look, or just jamming out to some Metallica. School doesn’t really interest her either, and would much rather spend her time with music. Her channel is her baby, and will slack off in school, in order to make sure it’s perfect. Rest assured, she does put a fair amount of effort into her homework, and won’t slack off on group projects. Her room is fairly messy, but she says it’s part of the creative process.

Tl;dr:

Determined

Optimistic

Social

Creative/musical

Messy

Restless

Loud

Trusting, to a fault

Relationships

Family: Misaki has two moms that she loves very much. Youko is her school’s choir instructor. She helps her learn her vocal parts, pick songs to suit her voice, and helps write her arrangements, if need be. Misaki does most of that by herself now, but mama’s always there to help! Kanna is a stay-at-home mom, with a large resume in musical theatre. They are both fiercely protective of her, and proud of her, for working her butt off to achieve her goals!

Love interest: None, yet ;) But, feel free to let me know about some potentials!

Friends/Allies: She has a strong social circle in her cram school, and at her regular school. She’s a friendly person, and wants to meet and get to know as many people as she can! But, some friendships depend on the universe:

She’s in the same history class as Metal Bat. They don’t really talk much, because he’s not in class super often.  They’re on good terms, they just don’t talk too much. She sometimes fills him in on lessons he missed, and attends the same cram school as Zenko. Her friends are mostly in her cram school, but she has some friends in school as well.

Misaki has piano lessons with Zenko every Thursday evening at her cram school. The two of them have a pretty normal student/teacher relationship. Zenko is an avid viewer of her channel, though, and is willing to help her with her piano lines. Sometimes she runs into Gaman in the hallways, and they are in the same biology class. They also take music lessons together, when the cram school is having a performance. She knows that the two of them are related, and she’s friendly to both.

Enemies: There are a few people that make nasty comments on the way she looks, and her internet haters, but that’s it.

Quotes:

“No, I do not play basketball.”

“Mom, I can’t get this chord. Can you help?”

“I’m recording right now!”

Trivia

She has a little under 2,000 followers on Twitter, where she gives updates about her videos.

She owns a beat up, 1960s, cherry red pickup truck, but she normally walks everywhere.

She has a light brown pet ball python, named Udon.

——-

Talk to me people, tell me what you think.

[nerdtrash-iteration]

(Re)watching Doctor Who: series 9

So this is where the infamous pair Heaven Sent and Hell Bent reside. You’ll see my feelings on the latter are rather lengthy. Let’s see how we did here. Series 9 (Twelfth Doctor)

9.X1: Last Christmas I loved this Christmas special. I thought it was a great homage to both the Alien franchise and Inception. The guest cast were really fun (especially Santa Claus), the plot kept me interested and there were many very sweet character moments. Loved Danny Pink’s brief return and the sleigh scene at the end especially. Bit awkward at the end with the fake-out of Clara leaving, you can really tell it was a rewrite. But I really enjoyed this one. 9.1: The Magician’s Apprentice Excellent opening episode. A cold open that immediately grabbed me, love the confirmation of Clara’s bisexuality and Missy is very welcome back. I wasn’t a huge fan of how they found the Doctor, felt a bit too contrived for my liking. Also wasn’t fond of his guitar antics and the whole notion of his last day alive. Felt a bit ehh. But I love all the character interactions here and the reveal of Skaro was fantastic. 9.2: The Witch’s Familiar A great 2nd part to the first story of this series. I adore Missy’s interactions with Clara, I highkey ship them but I do also ship Missy with everyone. It was also really interesting to see the Doctor and Davros have a civil-ish conversation. I still haven’t watched the classic era yet so I currently only know Davros from the series 4 finale. He didn’t really wow me there but I quite like this more complex portrayal of him. The Daleks are quite fun here, especially when Missy messes with them. It was a bit disappointing to see Davros double-cross the Doctor, I really thought they would try something different with him. Also sad that the Doctor just knew the whole time, made the interaction seem more fake. I feel the connection to the opening is a taaaaad tenuous with how old Davros is influenced by it, wish that had been a bit clearer. But I’ll allow it. 9.3 + 9.4: Under the Lake + Before the Flood I was so disappointed in this story. It’s hard for me to judge the two episodes separately so I’ll just talk about the story overall. I was quite bored throughout. Found the ghost design quite generic and not scary, the explanation of the mystery was absolutely batshit and I really didn’t care for it. I thought the plot resolution was pretty good and kinda cool how the Doctor transported himself to the future. Also cool that 2nd half took place in the past and ended up causing the flood. I love a good bootstrap paradox. But the reveal that his ghost was a hologram really felt like a cop-out. The guest cast were initially quite awkward but did grow on me in the 2nd part. I also was glad they wrote a deaf character with agency and made her the leader of the team. I saw Toby Whithouse wrote this, so I wasn’t surprised both the Doctor and Clara referred to the pilot as “he/she/it”. He has written some lowkey transphobic lines in the show before. That one isn’t that bad but just sounds so awkward. No-one uses the pronoun “it”. And just say “they”. Overall quite a disappointing story for me after that great first one. 9.5: The Girl Who Died I set my expectations a bit lower after that previous story. But this one was quite fun! Nice to have something a bit more light-hearted. Aschildr was fun but I didn’t feel she was very well-developed at this point. Kinda the generic “I’m not like other girls” trope used here. The Mire were an interesting race in how they survived on their reputation. The ragtag amateur feel of the finale was fun, with the use of electric eels. I thought Aschildr using the hologram technology to project the image of a sea serpent was a biiiit of a stretch though. Also some of Clara’s interactions just feel a bit awkward here. I thought the decision to basically make Aschildr immortal was very ethically dodgy on the Doctor’s part but I’m curious to see how it plays out in the next episode. 9.6: The Woman Who Lived Ah I loved this episode! It was so fun. I appreciated how simple its plot was and that it largely focused on the Doctor and Aschildr’s interactions. She was a lot more interesting in this episode, with some really great dialogue between her and the Doctor about immortality. Sam the Swift was really fun too. A really enjoyable episode. 9.7 + 9.8: The Zygon Invasion + The Zygon Inversion This is a very flawed story but one I still really enjoyed. Really felt like a proper sequel to the Zygon subplot in Day of the Doctor with how big in scale and budget it was. Really love to see Osgood(s) back and Kate Stewart. I really like the horror vibe the first part has especially with building in suspense. I think Osgood’s refusal to be defined as human or Zygon is thematically brilliant and her interactions with the Doctor are great. Love the Doctor calling Bonnie “Zygella”. I do find some of the plot details quiet frustrating though. Like the mechanism for the Zygons keeping a human form was very confusing. Also the radical Zygons’ plan just seemed really stupid? Like the humans outnumber you by a lot, they will kill you and your plan will be pointless. Also a bit disappointed in how Kate’s cliffhanger was resolved. Just shooting the Zygon in front of her, wow. But the speech at the end, damn. The two boxes and everything the Doctor said was amazing. Loved that. Overall a very enjoyable if flawed story. 9.9: Sleep No More Yiiiiiiiiiikes. I was warned this episode was underwelming and yeah, it be. It doesn’t make me angry though, just disappointed and confused. I absolutely adore the premise. Late-stage evil space capitalism not even letting workers sleep, absolutely brilliant. I can even roll with the idea of the change in brain chemistry making sleep dust into monsters somehow, sure. But all of the bonkers twists and attempts at being meta really frustrated me. It was just too many ridiculous ideas that we were expected to just accept and appreciate. Twists don’t necessarily make your story better, especially if you’ve just put one in to try and get a reaction from the audience. They work when they make sense in the story and add texture to it. The Doctor said it best: “None of this makes any sense”. 9.10: Face the Raven Oh faaaaaaaack. I hadn’t been watching Doctor Who for a while as I hadn’t been super feeling series 9. While I have enjoyed many of the stories up until now, I was frustrated by the lack of season arc. Felt like it wasn’t really focused on anything, besides vague notions of the Doctor’s confession dial and the Hybrid. Then just today I got in the mood to try to continue. Yeah this episode was a massive punch in the gut. I was immediately grabbed by the premise and the setting and having Rigsy and Ashildr back. I got so excited when they used trap streets!!! I just learned about them recently, they’re so fascinating. I loved the street itself and how Ashildr keeps the peace. It was really ruthless but narratively very interesting. I found the plot a taaaaaad contrived. Surely there were easier ways to get the Doctor and his confession dial and TARDIS key. But for character interactions were spot-on. Also I knew this was when Clara dies but the scene where they realise it left me a weeping mess. Like tears streaming down my face. Also the soundtrack in this episode was a bop. Fantastic episode, great way to pull me back in to Doctor Who. 9.11: Heaven Sent Okay so I’ve had this episode hyped for me for a good while. I’ve seen Doctor Who YouTube commentators call it their favourite episode. Personally there are episodes I enjoy more just because they tap into what I personally love in a story. But this still really impressed me. I love how good the episode looks, it really does feel special and cinematic. The twist is absolutely genius and I could not have predicted it. Everything about the harder-than-diamond wall was great. The ending montage was so emotional. Not my favourite but it certainly earns its reputation. 9.12: Hell Bent I was honestly tempted to just key-smash with this one because what the faaaaaaaaaaaaaack. In contrast to Heaven Sent, I’ve had others warn me that Hell Bent was their least favourite episode. And yeah, this ain’t it. I tried going in with an open mind but there are just too many things that annoy me. I personally really dislike the Time Lords as a presence in a story as they often do not feel like real characters. Just a vague annoying bureaucratic threat with very empty lore tied to them. “We must stop the Doctor, he bad, for reasons” is the feel I often get with them, it’s very annoying. The motivations of the various Time Lords and Sisters of Karn used here were also very unclear. One minute some are helping the Doctor, the next he’s against them all. Things were just happening too fast to keep up. Also why is there barely any significance made of the Doctor finally returning to Gallifrey???? Clara even asks “How did they get unfrozen?” and the Doctor says “I didn’t ask”. Just felt like the writers saying “Yeah we’re bored with this really important character arc that was set up all the way back in 2005, never mind”. I just thought the performance of the woman in the barn was really silly, with her wordlessly gesturing to the Doctor to come to the door to see the soldiers. I hated seeing a Gallifreyan crowd just surround the Doctor and silently applaud him like a hive mind for drawing a line in the sand. The whole thing with the soldiers going to the Doctor’s side one at a time just felt silly to me. That is a good idea in a story but something about the execution just felt off. It was cool to learn that the Cloister Bell in the TARDIS was likely linked with the basement cloisters on Gallifrey. But the cloisters themselves felt very underused and just thrown in there. After a lot of thought and seeking other hot takes on the episode, I see the Doctor’s real plan had feck all to do with the Hybrid (now a cursed word for me) and was just to save Clara. Which isn’t a bad idea necessarily but the choices so many characters make just felt so silly. Something about the script just didn’t work, like the actors were kids playing pretend and making up their own lines as they went. I really liked Clara as a companion (especially in series 8) but she had a good death in Face the Raven that fit her character, let her be. I really love the relationship between her and Twelve (especially how it’s the focus of series 8) but I think this is just a stretch. To shoot a Time Lord to kill, to go as far as he does, it just didn’t ring true. The rehash of the memory wipe from series 4 annoyed me, and there was a throwaway line as to why it was necessary and it just didn’t feel right. It just felt like “Ummmm we need a sad and dramatic end, this will work!!!”. And it just felt so unsatisfying and empty. Again like kids playing pretend and then they decide a character dies or gets amnesia to be dramatic. I was already not a fan of the series arc here (or lack thereof) and this really cemented it as the worst arc in revived Doctor Who so far for me. I see why RTD’s mystery box phrase might not be for everyone but at least they all led to something. “The Hybrid” was just a phrase that kept be dangled over our heads and ultimately meant nothing. It’s like a McGuffin but worse. It’s not an object to move the plot, it’s just nothing. “Oh no, Clara, through my selfish actions, I see now that I am the Hybrid!” No. It just felt like a contrivance made to get the Time Lords angry with the Doctor and it turns out they caused their own problems by bringing the Doctor to them and he ended up being their worst nightmare. There should be something poetic or ironic in that but it didn’t feel concrete enough for me to care. Ummmmm things I liked: -Another gender-swap regeneration, that was cool. Also T’nia Miller! I recognised her from Sex Education. -I always like seeing Ashildr and the Doctor muse over immortality. I liked seeing her at the end of the universe, even some of their musings over the Hybrid were kinda interesting. -Some of the Doctor’s dialogue before losing his memory was funny, like never eating pears. 9.X2: The Husbands of River Song This was quite a fun special! Definitely needed after how series 9 ended. The robot with the replaceable heads was fun, didn’t know this was when we first meet Nardole and it was nice to have River back. Her characterisation felt slightly off to me, like she was a bit too zany. But it’s probably just been a while since I’ve last seen her. Her not recognising the Doctor felt a bit too drawn out for me but the scene where she realises it is lovely. As is her ending scene, even if it sliiiiiightly goes against canon but whatever. I don’t know how to feel about her certainty that the Doctor never loved her. I myself did doubt their romantic connection as it more so felt like we were being TOLD they were a couple rather than believably showing it. I do believe the Doctor can fall in love but that it’s very rare and probably in a manner that humans might not appreciate. I think he was a monolith who loved her back but probably just not to the extent she wanted. So series 9 didn’t feel as cohesive in theme compared to series 8. I really liked many of the individual episodes but it didn’t feel like the series was really about anything. And that’s confirmed when we learn the Hybrid is basically nothing. I wish Clara got a better send-off, seeing her fly off in her own TARDIS with Ashildr just fell flat for me. We still got some great stories here if you just ignore the Hybrid arc.

[rayalez]

smut

0I don’t tell him I think handsome guys with heavy Spanish accent always sound like characters from a cheap soap opera. That might be a bit rude. But, to be honest, I think que way every “s” of his turns into a double “s” and some words get misplaced here and there is kind of cute.

He’s very tall, too tall for the tiny couch where we spend the night. I’m not small either, and we try to hug but end up in a mess of tangled limbs. He wakes up in the middle of the night and asks me if I’d like to move to bed with my friend, who went to sleep several beers before us, he says he wouldn’t mind sleeping in the couch by himself. I’m half asleep and snuggle closer to his neck and just say “no”.

A few hours later, I’m the one who wakes up with his arms around me and my back killing me. I turn to face him, deep asleep, and I kiss his neck and run my hands on his chest, his nipples, the front of his trousers. He is awake now, and helps me undress him. I take his cock in my mouth, the faint morning light coming to the living room through the bedroom door. I’m lying next to him, my back turned to him, and he is fucking me as silent as he can, slowly, little moans escaping to my ears.

We fall asleep again, and later, when I check my phone, it’s already 2PM. There’s a message from my friend, the one in the bedroom: “I really really really need to pee but I don’t want to walk into naked people in the couch. Help.” It’s from two hours ago. I show it to him, we laugh and I go make coffee for the three of us.

24

A few hours later, I get a message on my phone:

“I think I left my jacket at your place. Can you check it for me, please?”

“Yeah, it’s here.”

“Maybe I left it on purpose just to have an excuse to see you again…”

“Maybe I hid it.”

“Do you work tomorrow?”

“Yep.”

“Early?”

“Depends on what you consider early. I have to leave at nine-ish.”

“That’s cool.”

“Why?”

“I want to sleep with you again, but I don’t want to be one of those clingy guys.”

He is looking at the ceiling. It’s good to be in a proper bed.

“You know… There was a moment there, when you were on top of me, that it felt really weird. I was looking at you but I was seeing the buildings behind you through the corner of my eyes, and for a moment there it looked as if the whole world was upside down. It was weird, but it felt really good.”

I’m tracing his chest with my hand. He takes it and compares our palms.

“Wow, your hands are gigantic.”

“They are, but they’re also really well-shaped and pretty.”

His hands are pretty, as well, but mine are prettier and bigger, just a little. His hair is longer than my pixie boyish cut, and it spreads all over the pillows, the duvet, the bathroom tiles, the kitchen sink. It’s taking over the house.

He tells me about growing up in the seaside.

“It’s a city made for tourists, all the porteños spend their vacation there…”

“What’s a porteño?”

“Someone who’s born in Buenos Aires. Because of the harbours, portos.”

“Oh.”

“So when it was not hot season for tourists, the town would get kind of deserted and the prices for everything would be really cheap. There was this one bar that had all sorts of pinball machines and arcade games, and for just one peso I could play for hours.”

Then he tells me about his family, about his two younger siblings, and how bad he felt growing up.

“They’re so white. I’m the only one who turned out dark.”

“You’re the lucky one. You look like this cliche hot latin lover with olive-tanned skin.”

“Stop fetishising me. I have feelings. We don’t really have black people where I grew up, so everyone would call me negro and it really bugged me.”

“Does it still bug you? I think you look delicious.”

“A little bit. Only white people triumph in life, you know? I’ll never triumph.”

He sounds resigned.

“So you don’t like people of colour?”

“It’s not that, I just think they won’t triumph. The ones I really don’t like are the immigrants.”

“That’s true. Bloody immigrants taking our jobs.”

“And our women.”

His hands have been between my legs for a while, now, and he slides a finger in when he says that. I close my eyes and whimper, and he starts finger-fucking me while I bury my head in his shoulder. I take his cock in my hand, he moans and I lick my palm and start jerking him off. Then I get him in my mouth again, and he turns me over so he can do me while I’m sucking him off.

“Don’t you ever come?” I ask, pulling away and kissing him while his fingers move back to my pussy.

“Do you want me to?”

“Yes.”

“Do you want me to come in your mouth?”

“Yes.”

“Let me fuck you, first.”

When I check the time, it’s 2AM. I need to be up at 7. I’m not sleepy. It’s going to be a long Monday.

I wake up and go make coffee. I take a shower and he is still sleeping when I come back into the bedroom. I snuggle up close to him and wake him up with many tiny kisses on his face.

“You said you were a cat but now you look like a little chicken.”

I smile and continue to shower his face with little pecks. He laughs and rolls me over, pinning me to the mattress.

“Are you a chicken or a cat?”

I meow and hug him, bumping his shoulders with my head. His cock is hard against my legs, but I really need to get to work. I try to push him away, but he whines. “Just a little biiiit.” I get up and tell him to go wash the dishes so I can get us something to eat.

He stares at me.

“What,” I say.

“I was wondering if you’re being serious.”

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“I’m a guest, how can you make me wash the dishes? That’s so rude.”

“Oh please, you’ve been here for over 24h in a row, you can’t play the guest card.”

“You’re a mean woman.”

“I’m a witch.”

48

“I forgot my headphones at your place. Damn.”

“Poor thing.”

“Or maybe it’s just another excuse to go back…”

“Don’t you have classes today?”

“Just one. I’m free at 8.”

“Gosh, you are clingy. That way you’ll just get tired of my face in no time.”

“Well maybe you will get tired of mine.”

“But your face is so fine.”

I’m lying between his legs, my head resting on his thigh. His cock is hard but I’m just looking at it.

“What’s this?”

“It’s a tiny scar. I had that surgery when I was a kid, you know?”

I slide his foreskin so I can take a look at the head.

“And this?”

“I’ve always had that.”

I count the freckles and spots. It looks good. Very good.

I lick the head and suck his balls. He moans, but I’m just getting to know the new territory. I lick again from base to the head, and he breathes in and grips my hair.

“I think he likes me,” I say.

Later, he opens the bathroom door with no warning.

“I’m peeing! Get out!”

“What? I’ve already seen all of your body.”

“But I’m peeing. I’ve got a shy bladder.”

“Pee on my hands.”

“So romantic. I think we’ll get along just fine.”

We can barely keep our eyes open, but his hands won’t leave my body.

“It’s your own fault for being so damn hot.”

“For Christ’s sake I need to sleep. Get away you filthy Argentinian perv.”

“Let me sleep like this,” he puts his hand between my legs, barely moving. I take his cock in mine.

“Ok. I’ll sleep like this, then.”

We end up fucking again, but I do sleep with his cock in my hand, afterwards. I think I like it, too.

In the morning, I sit on the bed and look at him, covering his head with a pillow and not wanting to wake up. I start bouncing on the bed, saying wake up wake up wake up wake up. He looks at me through a tiny opening under the pillow, and asks:

“What time is it?”

“Eight. I need to leave at nine.”

“It’s early,” he says, and covers his head back with the pillow.

“It’s not. I’m late. Wake uuuup. Go make coffee while I take a shower.”

“Do this, do that…” he mumbles and stands. I think he’s going to the kitchen, but he sits back on the bed, just behind me, and puts his arms around me and his chin on my shoulder. It’s sweet and I’m not very good at sweetness.

“You’re not moving,” I say.

“In a moment.”

I rest my head against his neck and kiss it.

“Ok.”

72

“This is the longest first date in history,” I text, when he suggests he wants to see me again.

“Are you tired of me yet?”

“Yes, but you still need to wash the dishes. Do all of your first dates last 72h?”

“Of course not.”

“I think if we go over this mark we’ll have to see this whole situation as a challenge, see how far we can get.”

“Today I leave quite late. You can go meet my place.”

“I could, but it’s too far from the new office, and I need to be there early tomorrow morning.”

“My house is six minutes away from yours, by bike, but I’m not sure I’m awake enough to take the journey.”

“It’s a pity, for a moment there I thought we could make it to the Guinness Book of Records for dating.”

“You’re going to make me go to your place again, aren’t you?”

“I won’t make you do anything, the human being is an animal capable of free will.”

We’re lying in bed. We’re living in my bed, leaving just to work, eat, shower, take care of our basic needs. He wants to fuck me but I don’t let him.

“I can’t take it.”

“Are you too tired?”

“No, I literally can’t take it anymore. My pussy hurts, I think it’s sore.”

“Can I lick it better?”

He does, and he slides his fingers up my ass and looks up at me, smiling.

“Look how wet you get.”

“It’s because I like it so much.”

Later, he comes in my mouth. We try to sleep but his fingers keep finding their way to keep me awake.

“Stop. You’re going to get me dehydrated.”

“It’s your own fault. Witch.”

“Perv.”

“You like to sleep like this, right? Last night we spent the whole night on this same position.” I’m snuggled up on his chest, my nose buried on his neck. His shoulders are broad and warm.

“I can’t recall.”

“We did.”

I kiss his neck, gently, and his fingers are moving again.

“Stop. Stop. Stop.”

“Such a mean woman.”

“The dishes.”

It’s morning again, he is sitting lazily on the couch and we’ve just finished eating my tapiocas. He throws his head back in despair.

“Stop ordering me about! Do this, do that, don’t fuck me now, do fuck me now… Do you think I’m your servant?”

“Yes. My sex slave.”

“You’re the one who’s my sex slave.”

“Not only you’re my sex slave, you’re my on-call delivery sex slave. I just sit back and wait for you to come whenever I want.”

“Oh my god you’re actually right. I’m so pathetic.”

“Yes. Luckily, you’re good looking enough to get away with it.”

He stands up and gets closer to me, towering over me and looking down, his hair falling on my face, his lips very close. He grips my neck gently with one of his hands and slides the fingers from the other in my mouth. I close my eyes and suck on them. He says, quietly:

“You need to work on improving your submissive ways, woman, otherwise this relationship will have no future.”

I reply, licking his fingers and looking up at him:

“I’ll try.”

I slide my hand into his ridiculous orange underwear and take his cock, brushing his balls and caressing the head with my palm. He moans, and I suck hard on his fingers. He drops his forehead on my shoulder and starts moving his hips. I say:

“I’ll start tomorrow,” and pull away from him abruptly, getting in the bathroom and closing the door. I scream at him: “Do the dishes!”

When I finish my shower and get out, he’s looking grumpily at me over his shoulder, the water tap running and soapy cutlery in his hands.

“Bloody witch,” he bickers.

96

“Gosh I need a massage. My back is still killing me, since that night we spent on your couch.”

“Hm I’m afraid I’m not a massage pro but I could offer a cat massage?”

“That sounds good.”

Later, he’s at my place again and we’re both almost too sleepy to talk. He is lying down on his stomach and I’m sitting on top of him, pressing my hands against his back.

“Would you like me to have a go?” he asks.

We change places and he starts showing me how to find tension nodes. It hurts, but it’s really good.

“Oh so that’s how you do it…” I say, feeling his firm hands pressing against my achy spots.

“Yes. Now you do it.”

He jumps off me and lies down again, and I stare at him, outraged.

“Seriously? You didn’t even do it for five minutes! This wasn’t a massage, this was just a tutorial!”

“Well, you needed it.”

“I can’t believe you! So selfish! So ungrateful! You come to my place, sleep on my bed, leave your damn hair everywhere and still complain about my massage skills!”

“Oh. Don’t be mad. It was cute.”

“Cute?!”

“Try again.”

I do, and he moans deeply when I find the little tension nodules on his shoulder blades. It’s kind of cool.

“You know, I had this yoga instructor, years ago, and once I got to class and he was telling me about this self-massage course he took during the weekend.”

“That sounds useful.”

“But also kind of depressing.”

“Yes…”

I tell him the guy is now a renowned painter, according to his own personal Instagram marketing. He’s even appeared on TV with his colourful splashes, and he’s exhibited in Oslo and won a few international prizes no one’s ever heard of. I tell him that’s the kind of painter I should go out with.

“Have you ever had a solo show?”

“Not really. I don’t try, to be honest. I rarely sell stuff. Sometimes I trade paintings with friends for useful things that I’m in need. I just did a few exhibitions with some friends, mostly for social causes.”

“Why don’t you try selling your stuff?”

“I can’t deal with fame.”

I laugh and fall on the bed beside him, giving up on the massage.

“Because you’re such a talented jerk that if you moved one tiny finger to get your paintings out there, you’d be instantaneously famous, right?”

“Exactly.”

He says, closing his eyes.

“It must be tough being you.”

“You have no idea.”

I look at his peaceful face for a few moments, and before I realize it, my eyes are closed as well. I hear his voice:

“If you had told me we were going to sleep I wouldn’t even bother coming all the way over here, I thought we were going to have sex.”

I open my eyes, his are still closed.

“You’re the one who’s sleeping,” I say.

“You’re the one who’s sleeping,” he replies, barely audible.

“Why are you dressed?” I say, tugging at his shirt.

“You’re dressed, too.”

“I can undress.”

“So do.”

“But you promise we’ll sleep? I’m exhausted.”

“I promise.”

I’m sucking his cock and playing with his balls. One of my fingers brushes his ass, and he arches his back, leaning in to me. I look up and ask:

“Do you like it?”

He nods, breathless, and says:

“Do you like it?”

I smile, still looking at him, my lips touching the head of his cock, and let some dribble fall on top of it. It slides all over the length, and I let some more spit fall on his balls. I jerk him off a little bit, my hand getting moist and slippery, and he closes his eyes. I take him in my mouth again and reach his lips with my wet fingers. He licks them, and when they’re wet enough I go back to his ass. I put a finger in, slowly, and he moans. I keep sucking, watching his face while I curl my finger and feel him getting more relaxed. He’s breathing faster and starts moving his hips to fuck himself against my finger. I move faster and take his cock deep into my throat, letting more spit fall on his balls and drip to his ass. He is moaning and grabbing my hair, and I suck faster and deeper, swallowing as much of his cock as I can, almost gagging, feeling my fingers deep inside him, brushing the sweet spot that gets him over the edge. For the first time, he finishes without warning, filling my throat with a thick load of come. I swallow all of it, his back is arching lifting off the mattress, his body all tensed up, his spine almost bending broken, his hands clinging to my head, his own head thrown back, eyes closed shut. I wait for it to be over, and it lasts a long time. Then I softly remove my finger and let his cock slide out of my mouth onto his stomach, limp, wet and still big. I lick it gently, tasting the last few drops. He is lying on the bed with closed eyes and a satisfied smile. I lie next to him and kiss him, slow and wet. He faintly throws an arm over my body, exhausted, and looks at the ceiling and starts laughing.

“What?” I say.

“Nothing. It was too good.”

I smile as well, feeling smug.

“It’s difficult to find guys who like that.”

“Is it?”

“Yes. I think I’m one lucky witch.”

“It was way too hard waking up.”

“I know. It’s because we went to sleep after 2am.”

“But we’ve been sleeping after 2am everyday…”

“Exactly.”

I don’t tell him it took me a couple of hours to finally get to sleep, listening to his heavy breath on my neck, his warm arms around me. I felt one or two shy tears escaping my eyes, and took a deep breath; I did some quick math on my mind and realised our date had reached 100 hours. The first 100 hours and I didn’t cry once, that must be a record; I didn’t want to ruin it, but I’m so scared I feel like my blood turned into cold liquid.

Now, we’re sitting on the couch and Mitya, the cat, jumps to his lap. He plays with him, his pretty well shaped hands moving softly. I look at him and I don’t feel scared anymore. I feel the shadow of fear but I don’t feel fear. I’m afraid of the shadow.

I consider telling him to run away now, to get away from me, to escape while it’s time because with me there’s no turning backs, nothing is ever light or casual, it only goes deeper. Getting into my heart is a one way road, and it’s a rocky one. I know I’m not easy, I know I’m a leaver, I know I confuse people and scare them off. I don’t know if I really want to scare him away or test him, or if I’m so terrified because rejection always seems the only possibility, so I think it’s better to get rid of him before it happens; I don’t think I’ll be able to take another blow, not so soon, not so soon. This was supposed to be just a date. It wasn’t supposed to go like this.

His head is bowed down, his wet hair falling over his face, his eyes looking affectionately at Mitya, Mitya’s neck exposed to him. I lie my head on his lap, beside the cat, and look up at him. Mitya starts purring. He strokes both our necks, and smiles. He looks so damn yummy. I want to keep him.

I’m super late, but I tell him there’s something I need to do before we leave.

I take my tarot deck, shuffle it with my back to him, cut and take a single card:

The Chariot. Number seven.

My lucky seven.

100

“Look, I just got home to realize I left the keys hanging outside the door. For the whole day. Besides, this morning, you remember, I almost left the gas on when we were leaving. There’s only so much coffee a person can take to keep going. I’m on my limit. I can’t take it anymore. This is getting dangerous. I need to sleep. I admit defeat. I think 100 hours is a good enough mark for a date. It’s over.”

“What do you mean by that? Are you dumping me?”

“No, idiot. I mean that tomorrow we can talk about our second date.”

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