#lairde loki

[just-helpol-things]

I’ve never posted art before (mostly because I don’t love the way my drawings look) but I drew this for my deities and I’m actually proud of it.

It’s (from left to right- or top to bottom I suppose) Lairde Dionysus, Lady Aphrodite, Lord Ares, Lady Artemis, Lord Apollo, Lord Asclepius, Lady Athena, Mother Gaea, Lord Hypnos, and Lairde Loki

These are all the deities I worship all together! This is just how I see them and how they look like and would stand. (Dio is a short king according to Him, and Lord Apollo says he looks like the Statue of Liberty)

[pupsmailbox]

STARTING WITH L

MASCULINE︰ lachlan. laird. lake. lamar. lambert. lamont. lance. landen. landon. landry. landyn. lane. lanford. langston. lanny. larry. laurence. lavern. laverne. lawrence. lawson. layne. layton. laz. leandro. ledger. lee. legacy. legend. leighton. leith. leland. len. lenard. lennie. lennon. lennox. lenny. lenox. leo. leon. leonard. leonardo. leonel. leonidas. leopold. leroi. leroy. les. lesley. leslie. lester. letter. lev. levi. levon. lew. lewin. lewis. lex. leyton. liam. lincoln. linford. link. linton. linus. linwood. lionel. liu. lloyd. logan. london. loren. lorenzo. lorin. lorn. lorne. lorrin. lou. louie. louis. lovel. lovell. lowell. loyal. loyd. luca. lucas. lucca. lucian. luciano. lucius. lucky. luis. luka. lukas. luke. luther. lyall. lyle. lyndon. lynn. lynton. lynwood. lyric.

FEMININE︰ laila. lainey. lakelynn. lana. laney. lara. laura. laurel. lauren. layla. laylanni. leah. leandra. leanna. leena. legacy. leia. leighton. leila. leilani. lena. lennon. lennox. leona. leslie. letter. lexi. lexie. leya. leyla. lia. liana. libby. liberty. lila. lilah. lilian. liliana. lilianna. lilith. lillian. lilliana. lillie. lilly. lily. lina. lindsey. lisa. liv. logan. lola. london. londyn. lonnie. loralai. lorelai. lorelei. louisa. louise. lucia. luciana. lucille. lucy. luisa. luna. lyanna. lydia. lyla. lylah. lynnette. lyra. lyric.

NEUTRAL︰ labyrinth. lace. lacy. lai. laiken. laine. lake. laken. lali. lam. lamar. lamp. lance. landry. landyn. lane. lang. lark. larkin. latch. lau. laurel. laurence. laurent. lavan. lave. lavender. lavey. lawan. lawin. layken. layne. layton. lazarus. le. leaf. leather. ledger. lee. left. legaci. legacy. legend. lei. leigh. leighton. leis. leith. lek. lemar. len. leni. lennie. lennon. lennox. lenny. lenox. leo. leon. leone. lesley. leslie. less. letter. levi. levian. levy. lex. lexi. lexington. leyton. li. liam. lian. liann. liberty. lie. liel. life. lilac. lille. lilo. lily. limit. lin. linae. lind. linde. linden. lindi. ling. lingxi. link. linn. linux. lio. lione. lior. lithium. liyan. lo. lock. logan. logic. lois. lok. loki. lolan. london. lone. lonnie. loose. loren. lorin. lost. lotus. lou. loui. louie. louis. love. loyal. loyalty. luca. lucca. lucid. lucka. lucky. ludo. lue. lui. luka. lull. lumi. lumière. lunar. lune. lurch. lurk. luscious. lutfi. lux. ly. lykke. lyn. lyndon. lynn. lynx. lyre. lyric. lyrik. lý.

[kandisheek]

FIC REC WEEK 16 – DARK FIC

The Laird in the Water by jellybeanforest

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: M Words: 17,920 Tags: Dark Fairy Tale Creatures, Graphic Violence, Cannibalism

Summary: In 14th century Scotland, Steve is a child with an imaginary friend that lives in a nearby river, the site of many drownings and horrific discoveries. His Nan claims it to be the work of a kelpie. Steve doesn’t believe her of course. Kelpies are a myth, old wives tales to keep children from playing near swiftly-moving streams and young women from entertaining the company of handsome strangers. However, as he grows, Steve realizes that the young man in the water may not be quite as imaginary nor as innocuous as he once believed.

Reasons why I love it: I love, love, LOVE the world building in this! It always amazes me when people can write in a style that perfectly emulates the time period the story is set in, and jellybeanforest does an excellent job of it here. The setting is so good, and I absolutely love the dark fairy tale elements. I adore this fic, so if you haven't read it yet, I hope you give it a go!

Stars and Stripes Forever by Anonymous

Pairing: Steve/Tony, Steve/Avengers, Steve/Loki Rating: E Words: 29,604 Tags: Rape, Major Character Death, Sexual Slavery

Summary: Steve wakes in a very different 21st century. One where he's owned by the man who fished him out of the sea.

Reasons why I love it: This fic is all the Steve whump our sick little hearts could desire. Please do mind the tags – everyone aside from Steve is the darkest possible version of themselves, and they act accordingly. It gets pretty graphic at times, but that's what we love about dark fic, isn't it? Anyway, this fic is amazing, and if you like disturbing shit, you'll love this one!

Not In Kansas Anymore by fohatic

Pairing: Steve/Tony Rating: E Words: 28,585 Tags: Multiverse, Non-Con, BDSM

Summary: It was truly uncanny, how alike they both were. His voice. His mannerisms. His meticulously-groomed facial hair. If he didn't know any better, Steve would've thought that it was the same man he’d left back on Earth-617... The only noticeable difference between them was that look in his eyes... Steve hadn't missed it, the way that this Tony was watching him as if he were a rabbit that had wandered into a tiger's lair, regarding him with an unsettling sort of amusement as he invited him deeper into the penthouse, brown eyes sharp and smoldering with something that Steve didn't recognize. -- Steve Rogers attempts to covertly gather intel on a mysterious weapon from a parallel universe's Tony Stark, and ends up in a predicament that he never saw coming.

Reasons why I love it: Okay, first of I just have to say – the scenario that fohatic came up with here is an actual stroke of genius. It's so, SO well thought out, giving the perfect reason to have completely unavoidable non-con in a fic, with neither of the parties involved being at fault. And the turmoil when what happened is revealed is all the more delicious for it. I love this fic so fucking much, and if you haven't read it yet, I highly recommend that you do, because it's brilliant!

[jayofolympus-writes]

WIP Game!

I was tagged by @loki-is-my-kink-awakening, thank you so much for the tag!

Rules: make a new post with the names of all the files in your wip folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Tag as many people as you have wips. People send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, then post a little snippet or tell them something about it!

The Witcher

Lambert Angst Fic

More Than Half

Deaging Shenanegins

Jaskier's Crush

Co-Parenting ft. Mathilde and Gethin

Lambert Gender Feels

Selkie Lamb

Call of Duty

Bruises

Christmas With the Garricks

Doug

Delirious and Dying

Latha Math sequel

Mando 141

Laird MacTavish

Bullet for a Wedding Ring

Star Wars

Buir Cody

Boba Fett Saves the Galaxy

The Brothers Oppress

Other

Elysium

Escaping the Labyrinth

I could not possibly tag as many people as I have WIPs, so I'm gonna tag @tumbleweedtech, @on-a-lucky-tide, @round--robin, @frenchkey, @lokibuswrites, @sl-walker, @nekrosmos, and @anonymousblueberry

[culture-robertosn]

Scottish Legends

Just like all places in the world Scotland has no small amount of legends/myth that come from many times and areas, stories of ghost, demons and monster. Most of these tales sprout from mythology and fear. I have decided to research these mysterious stories and I will make my own artwork of some of these entities, as well I shall explain what they “creatures” are.  

Unicorn

The unicorn is actually Scotlands national anime if you didn't know but why is that? Unicorns have been featured in many cultures all over the world, the body of a white horse with a single spiralling horn atop its face, in the Celtic mythology unicorns are a symbol of purity, innocence and power. There are legends that say the horns can cleanse poisoned water such is the power of their healing properties, maybe if these creatures were once real it could explain why Scotland has such pure waters. These untameable and proud beasts are fiercely independent and are almost impossible to capture/conquer, perhaps that is why they are Scotlands national animal as their unbreakable will is like so many of Scotlands heros of old.  

Kelpie

The kelpie is a supernatural water horse that is said to haunt the lochs and lonely rivers of Scotland. Described as a horse but with the power of taking human form, some tales state the kelpie retains its hooves even in human form this also links to the Christain idea of Satan. The victims would be approached by a dark grey or white pony but would always have a soaking wet mane constantly dripping, its target would be lured almost hypnotised to ride the horse and would be dragged down to a watery grave. There is one story that speaks if a captured Kelpie, Laird of Morphie captured and harnessed the power for his own. He made the kelpie carry heavy stones so he could construct his castle and when finished he did release the horse but many believe the kelpie cured his line and explains the extinction of the Laird family.  

Loch Ness Monster “Nessy”

Likely Scotlands most famous legend, this is a large dinosaur-like creature suspected to be that of a Plesiosaurus this creature is believed to live in Loch Ness. The first record of “Nessy” sightings was almost 1’500 years ago when a huge beast was seen leaping out of the lake and devoured a farmer and from that day on the legend of the Loch Ness monster was born.  1934 a doctor from London manged to take a photograph that seemed to show the monster emerging from the water, many sightings have been reported since then and yet no creature has been found however in 2009 loads of people claimed google earth had found proof of “Nessie” existence but nothing came of this. Loch Ness hold an estimated 263 billion cubic feet of water, more than all the lakes and rivers in the whole of England and Whales combined, its believed that Loch Ness’s deepest pint is over 800ft deep just for a comparison this is twice the average depth of the North Sea. So given how deep the Loch is perhaps “Nessy” lives at the deepest depth and is just waiting to strike once more.  

The Stoor Worm

A gigantic evil sea serpent in Orcadian folklore, capable of contaminating the earth and destroying anything in its past with only its putrid breath. It sounds like an Orkney variant of the Norse world serpent, Jormungandr. Jormungandr is a child of Loki and is so massive its entire body covers the entire worlds oceans and he bites down on his own tale, he is described to be like a sea dragon hence the comparison to The Stoor Worm. At sunrise on Saturday the Stoor Worm would wake and yawn nine times then would demand seven virgins to feast on, a king of one country threatened by the Worms arrival was advised to offer the seven scarifies however the king would suffer this beast no longer. In a desperate attempt to end the monster he issued a proclamation offering his entire kingdom, his daughter’s hand and a magic sword to anyone who could slay the Worm. The youngest son of a local farmer, Assipattle took up the challenge and slayed the creature as the monster died its said its teeth fell out to become the island of Orkney, Shetland and Faroes, its body became what would be known as Iceland.  

Note: The symbolic artwork is interesting as it tells the story of the Stoor worm and I like that type of art style its good when the art tells a story. 

[zrtranscripts]

Season 8, Mission 27: I Will Kill Again

Order Of The Red God

~

SHONA REID: I wish we could have been friends, Five. I bet you're scared down there in the dark. I can just imagine you running through those caves, stumbling between shadow and stone. You should see it up here. It's gorgeous! Green hills, cloud-swept skies. I love this island, Five. I was born and bred here. It's part of me. Shame half the folk living here are idiots. Gossips like Morag Brown. They don't see who I am. They just see the laird's kid, plucky lass and nae much to think about. But I've got power, Five. The fruit of this island in my blood. That's why I wish we could be friends. Because you can see the real me.

Tom went down heavy when I shot him, eyes wide. You lot really thought it was my dad, didn't you? Leading the skincoats. You thought he stole the Edda. The key to the red fungus growing on the mainland, the secret of why has died off there but strives here. The key to that bloody Prime Minister of yours who thinks she can tell us our island is quarantined! Is that you, Five? I'm sitting right by the cave I led Tom out of. I see shuffling down there.

[gunshot]

I took his gun along with his headset. That is you, Five. I recognize your shadow. Hoping to get out this way, I bet. Tom couldn't get past me, and neither can you. [gunshot] Missed. Ah well. That's it, Five. Swerve around, back into the depths. I better follow you. Can't have you telling everyone about me. You run those caves. I know you like a race, but I was faster than Tom. I bet I'll be faster than you, too.

~

SHONA REID: Do you see the carvings on the walls, Five? The twining circles? They're ancient. Left by the first islanders, markers of the deepest tunnels. We are deeper than you've ever been. Lachlan and I used to run these caves. My idea. The old myths say these tunnels are full of ghosts, spirits of long-dead islanders. I was little when my mum passed away. Meningitis. I used to think if there were ghosts down here, maybe I'd find hers.

There's a lot of ghosts around this island, Five. Tom was right. I did shoot Lachlan's decoy that night on the beach. Lachlan was supposed to be there alone. The decoy looked like him in the storm. When I realized my mistake, I meant to go after him, make him pay for tricking me. I could have got to the Edda then, but you lot had shown up. Put the island on alert. I had to get off the beach fast.

I was so angry with you, spoiling all my plans! But you did provide one thing. The death that was foretold. Your Ellie was the first sacrifice of the season of the red god. I see your torch flickering ahead of me, Five. Dying batteries. [gunshot, stalactite crashes to ground] Almost got you there, didn't I? Don't worry. I meant to hit that stalactite, drop it to block the passage. Just making sure you turned right instead of left.

See the carvings overhead? Clouds and lightning cut into the rock. The ancients saw storms as sacred. It's the last sky you'll see through human eyes, Five. My gift to you. You keep running straight. There's something else I want to show you before the end.

~

SHONA REID: Take a moment, Five. Look around. Not many have seen the cavern you're passing through. Isn't it something? All those stone pillars and altars, carvings on every surface. My mum would have loved this place. She was writing a book on the mythology here, left me all her notes after... After she died. 

This chamber was made by ancients. People who lived here long before the Vikings came. I always wondered what they meant it for, but now I know. The red god in my head connects me to all its followers, past and present. I see them here, dancing between the pillars in the very first ceremony for the king of the rocks. It was so long ago, they weren't even fully human! Before we spoke, before we ever lit a fire, the red god loved us! Who do you think taught us about fire?

Look up, Five. On the ledge above you. Or had you lost me? [gunshot] Oh, good reflexes, darting behind that pillar!

The Vikings wrote about the king of the rocks. Their Edda is our oldest written record of it. They witnessed so many things on our island, including our red god. The wizard Loki stole some red god from this isle, used it to create her wakened warriors, mingled it with plagues for her amusement. The Vikings didn't understand the alliance that existed here. Since time began, some islanders have been taking the red blessing. Step out of the shadows, friends.  

Do you like the skincoats, Five? And the flaming torches? We're big on the traditional look. The history books called us guardians of law and order, but we're so much more than that. We're the order of the red god. The protectors of this island's secrets. The order appeared to me as a child. I used to wander the caves, playacting legends from mum's notes. I was obsessed. The perfect recruit. They called me blessed.

No point backing towards the altars, Five. I'm above you. There's all nine of us encircling you. No more bullets, but we don't need them. Everyone who drinks the water on Mor Island, come this season, gets a little red god in their veins, a little of the red god and a little of the silver mud in perfect balance. The red makes Mor Islanders just that bit smarter, longer-lived, and thanks to the silver, they get to keep their humanity. A beautiful symbiosis.

But we in the order take extra sacrament. Keeps us fast and strong. The red god connects us, whispers in our dreams. What Lachlan Jones told Morag Brown was right. We see through each other's eyes. If there's red god in you, we can start to sense your thoughts. Morag was right not to think too hard about the Edda. If she'd envisaged it in her mind, we'd have seen it. That's where you can never defeat us. There's a line of us stretching back millennia. I can even see my own hand faintly as it writes the Edda all those years ago.

And I see us closing in on you from every side. Look at you, Five. Squeezing between those altars and diving through that arch. But the tunnels past there are a labyrinth! Keep running all you like! We know this place by heart, and we enjoy the chase.

~

SHONA REID: These caves really twist and turn, don't they, Five? So dark and shadowy. We almost lost you. Don't worry. There are ledges on top of the tunnel you're in. I've got people watching you.

Ach, honestly Five, this wee chat is like therapy. The thing about being in a secret order of only nine people is you dinnae get to gossip much. I've been bursting to show your lot who I really am. I killed Callum. He was going to break our oldest traditions, move the king of the rocks. We couldnae allow it, so I stepped up. The youngest in the order, and the bravest. I struck him with that rock. It was a family duty.

Poor Lachlan was the perfect scapegoat. We were shocked years later when we heard he'd found the Edda. So I sent him a message pretending to be my dad, told Lachlan he'd be forgiven if he brought it home. Remember how I said some of the coastal caverns flood, Five? The old islanders built channels into these caves, ways to redirect the flow. One of their little traps. Pull the right ropes, lift the right stones, and the floodwater goes anywhere. We're sending it to you.

That night on the beach, after I killed Lachlan's decoy, I searched his boat. He'd run off with the Edda, but guess what I found instead? A wee metal box, and the red god provides. Because then I bumped into you lot. I had Janine's control box all along. All I had to do was make her sicker now and then, keep you mad for Jones, and you lot hunted down the Edda for us. Had to smash the box on that ice bridge, or you would have wondered why Lachlan hadnae used it to heal himself.

Remember our last cave, Five, where I kept scorecard? All those grave-marked faces, that's the old way. To keep trophies of your hunt. I didnae kill them all, but I brought Lachlan here. I get credit for the fallout. I could have killed you there, but I like you, Five. You helped save the island from those disgusting godless modern zoms. And the Edda still needed sniffing out.

You've got a destiny, Five. The same as me. I knew it as soon as I heard your name. There are five circles in the symbol of eternity, the red god's sign. You've been chosen. Once you're one of us, you can help us eradicate the tainted undead from the mainland, the abominations that perverted the red god's gift. We're the only ones who can do it.

LAIRD REID: [distorted] Runner Five, hello. Can you hear me?

SHONA REID: There goes your torch, Five. Our eyes are used to this gloom. Yours aren't. And the water is rising.

LAIRD REID: [distorted] Runner  Five, hello! It's Laird Reid. Five, if you're hearing me, please follow the signal. Run in whatever direction my voice sounds strongest. I've called help. I can get you out, but you need to follow my voice. Run.

~

SHONA REID: We see you feeling your way along the cave walls, Five. Just give up. The water's already thigh-deep.

LAIRD REID: [distorted] This signal keeps fading. [?] stabilizing this bloody walkie-talkie. This should be on private channel. Okay, got it. I know you're surprised to hear me, Five. I – I was out looking for Shona. She said she was going for a run near Bas Sands. Since the ice bridge, I don't like her staying out late.

I heard Tom's last moments. He set his comms to transmit on the island's walkie-talkie frequency. Must have hoped someone was near enough to overhear. Shona's not a killer, Five! Look, those people drugged her, or-or tricked her, or... or something. I'm at the cave exit near where Tom died. If you hear me, home in on my voice. The louder my signal, the closer you are. And if you hit a dead end, double back. I hear flooding on your end. Hurry!

SHONA REID: I see you tilting your head, Five. Like your listening. You're moving with a lot of purpose. Someone's helping you, aren't they? Fine. If you're being difficult, I told you I have eyes on the ledges above you. All of you, climb down to intercept Five. I dinnae care if there's flooding. Nobody escapes our sanctum! Give chase, everyone. Run!

~

LAIRD REID: Look ahead, Five. That daylight at the end of the tunnel? That's where I am. The mouth of the cave. Keep going. You're clear of the flooding. I'm sorry about Tom, Five. He seemed like a good man.

SHONA REID: My people are right behind you, Five. I see you through their eyes.

LAIRD REID: Hurry, Five! There are skincoats following you!

SHONA REID: Is that... my dad? Is he helping you? Don't think he can stop us, Five. We've seen the Edda. The red god's ordered a new king of the rocks. We know how to perfect it. It's chosen us. It's chosen me. No one is getting in our way.

LAIRD REID: Five, those figures are almost on you. Get out of that cave, run!

~

LAIRD REID: Five, you made it. You're in daylight.

SHONA REID: My people are still behind you, Five. We can chase you just as well into the light.

LAIRD REID: They're still coming. I left my rifle at home. Bolt for those trees! We need cover.

[gunshots]

PAULA COHEN: Five! It's okay. It's us.

LAIRD REID: Look, Five, coming over that hill. Janine and Dr. Cohen. They're firing on the skincoats. That's it! Back, you devils! Back into the caves. [gunshots] Colonel, the skincoats are retreating. You can stop!

[JANINE DE LUCA screams in rage]

PAULA COHEN: It's okay, Janine. You're -

JANINE DE LUCA: Out of ammo. Yes.

PAULA COHEN: The laird called us for help, Five. We came as quickly as we could. We... found Tom's body. Jody's with him. Janine ordered Sam to stay with her. I'm glad you're okay.

LAIRD REID: Colonel, I know Tom was your brother. My daughter's hurt you. She's not thinking -

JANINE DE LUCA: A killer, Mr. Reid. She's lied to us, manipulated us, and declared war on us. There will be time to grieve later. We must fall back to safety. Five, you and Tom have uncovered our true enemy at enormous cost, and I swear I won't let his death be in vain. I will stop Shona Reid, no matter what it takes.

~

[brightlotusmoon]

Welp. Talking with @ulisabarbic-blog made me remember how 2003 Donnie's double mutation storyline was originally Mikey's, but Laird made them change it because "Mikey can only be goofy, make Don the victim" which made me recall a lot of serious storylines that had originally involved Mikey but were switched because Mikey couldn't be serious enough unless it was an alternate reality.

Being a fandom grandma is wild sometimes.

Also, I will absolutely say that sometimes canon doesn't know what it has. And @hummerhouse as a fanfic writer did the 03 balance better than the show writers, I can actually hear their dialogue and Mikey had wonderful intelligence discourse that never makes him sound like a slacker who doesn't understand big concepts.

I think it upsets me because Mikey's personality came from a friend of Kevin and Peter's, and 2003 leaned too heavily on the exaggerated comedic traits and didn't have room for the extremely insightful intuitive sensitive sweet traits except in bursts that would leave me craving more. It might be my waking up with a bunch of severely swollen joints and a lingering sensation that I acid tripped in my sleep, but I can't stop thinking that things could have been better and that I prefer fanon Mikey to canon, because of that long strange history of his character becoming one of the most powerfully influential archetypes in fiction, topped with Laird essentially shafting an entire part of him.

I love all the boys, 2003 and 2012 and 2018, and I still cannot fathom hating one or the other or what's currently happening, and I know that I defend all the Mikeys, but none of them are innocent, and we know this, and that is a powerful part of who Mikey is all around, his impish ways of riling everyone up, it's what he does, a trickster god playing among mortals, Puck or Hermes or Loki, knowingly obnoxious to just the right effect- but there is only so much we can take before he becomes overwhelmed by his own unbalanced characteristics in canon itself. And that's why I take the What If divergence and write it to my wanting. Mikey, all of him, deserves that.

[the-insomniac-cat2]

Laird Loki!

So I may have made another cursed image.. 👉👈

[writernotwaiting]

Why poetry is the perfect weapon to fight Trump

@freudensteins-monster @pseudognim @incredifishface @pedeka @maxwell-demon @lokiofmiddleearth @icybluepenguin @a-violet-vixen @larouau12 @hornedchick @crescent-moon-rising @missviolethunter @awolfbeneath @antyc67 @sarabeth72 @wolfsmom1 @loki-in-winterfell @kissimmmeme @catedevalois @nightmareofcat @indomitablemegnolia @aneternalfangirl @quoting-shakespeare-to-ducks @prudenceevenstar @ache-and-hunger @tomforachange   @asilhouetteindreams @ourqs @just-call-me-your-darling @runningamokwithanaxe @damageditem @darklittlestories @angrymadsygin @missdibley @bundyvimes @toasty-hancock @ladyninasayers-ish @musicfashionandscotch @thejeanetterun @wheresthekillswitch @feelmyroarrrr sharondn @just-call-me-your-darling @izhunny @lordjohnandtom @mystrangebones @lunariagold @angelus80

[just-helpol-things]

New offerings:

The cow is for Lord Apollon because cow and He likes cows

The toilet candy is for Lairde Dionysus because They wanted it and it’s silly

The Icee spray candy is for Lairde Loki because They wanted it

[zrtranscripts]

Season 8, Mission 22: Take A Chance On Me

Edda-cational Visit

~

[fanfare]

AMELIA SPENS: Hello, Mor Islanders. This is Prime Minister Amelia Spens. Listen, I am a reasonable person. One of you has a piece of the Edda of the Wakened Warrior. It's the key to stopping the red fungus growing on the mainland. Now I know you don't much care about the mainland, or indeed, anything of greater global importance than this year's turnip yield, so I'm offering a reward. Power, luxuries, as many turnips as you can eat. Whatever you want. You'd be surprised how many things I can make happen. Just bring me that Edda.

JODY MARSH: Sam, is there no way to block that out? It's the eighth time!

SAM YAO: Sorry, Jody. Amelia has the Undaunted broadcasting it on all frequencies. She's hellbent on getting the Edda, especially now she knows the king of the rocks connects to it and the red fungus.

JODY MARSH: She's got her marines to quarantine the cave me and Five found, the one with the seed pods. They're experimenting with acid to dissolve them. But we need the Edda to find out how to stop the fungus for good. Is the bribery angle working?

SAM YAO: Um, sort of? People are bringing her everything from the Ladybird Book of Vikings to An A to Z of Fungal Infections.

JODY MARSH: Don't they realize this is serious?

SAM YAO: They're just trying their luck. But Janine got a message on Rofflenet that could be legit, and Amelia wants us to check it out.

JODY MARSH: Let me guess – because it's extremely dangerous and unpleasant. Doesn't she have a sub full of marines to run errands for her?

SAM YAO: No, no, it's got to be us. Here's the message: "Colonel De Luca, thank you for your actions during the zombie invasion. You've earned my trust, unlike the Prime Minister. That's why I'm telling you that I have the Edda. The pages I have describe the wizard Loki and the zombie guards."

JODY MARSH: Hmm, sounds authentic. Probably a trap?

SAM YAO: Yeah. They want to meet by the old well at sundown. Alone.

JODY MARSH: Definitely a trap.

SAM YAO: The well's on the hill. If you approach from the north, we'll see which terrifying people are waiting to ambush you, eh?

JODY MARSH: On it. Come on, Five. Run!

~

SAM YAO: Five, Jody, get down!

[foliage rustles]

JODY MARSH: What's up? I can't see anyone!

SAM YAO: [sighs] No, it's nothing. I thought I saw a figure on the edge of the town, watching you, dressed in gray.

JODY MARSH: Not following us now, anyway?

SAM YAO: [sighs] No, I might have imagined it. Haven't been sleeping well recently. Lots of nightmares. People in skincoats chasing me. Only in the dreams, they were made out of actual skin dripping red blood. Okay, you should have a good view of the well from where you are. See anything?

JODY MARSH: Someone's standing by the well. A young man with curly hair. He doesn't look armed. Look, he heard us! He's running off into the woods! Let's stay on this ridge above and follow him, Five. Run!

~

JODY MARSH: I can see him through the trees. Five, there's no one else here. Rugby tackle him!

[Runner Five tackles RORY, foliage rustles, RORY shouts]

RORY: Get off me, you – Runner Five, it's you.

JODY MARSH: Who did you think it was? You contacted us.

SAM YAO: Oh! [laughs] Oh, it's Rory from the corner shop. He's a nice kid, bit dim. If he's a skincoat, I'll eat your running shoes, Five.

RORY: Someone else is after me. I thought you were them. They want the Edda. It's valuable, right? The Prime Minister's offering a big reward?

JODY MARSH: Yeah. You're right not to trust her about... about almost everything. But she'll keep her word on this. "A deal's a deal" is practically her religion.

RORY: Are you sure? Because I'm not safe on this island. The Edda's my ticket off.

JODY MARSH: I'm positive. If you have it, Amelia will help you.

RORY: I don't have it with me. It's – it's hidden. We can get it now. I'll explain on the way.

SAM YAO: Uh, Five, give him a headset. Hi.

RORY: Oh. Hello, Sam! You came to the corner shop once, asked if we still had Curly Wurlies.

SAM YAO: [laughs] Yeah! Yeah, that was probably me.

RORY: What was that?

JODY MARSH: I don't know, but I don't think we're alone in these woods. Rory, which way to the Edda?

RORY: Through the gully. Come on.

~

RORY: Careful on the loose rocks.

SAM YAO: Can you see anyone behind you?

JODY MARSH: No. But I can feel eyes on the back of my neck. Can't you, Five? So how did you end up with the Edda?

RORY: I found it a few days ago. Just – just lying on the path.

JODY MARSH: What a bit of luck.

RORY: Not really. Someone worked out I have it and they've been on my tail ever since.

SAM YAO: How did you know where the Edda was?

RORY: Because of my granda. He was an old Norse professor. My parents died when I was a bairn. Granda took me in. Didn't want to raise me in a city, so we came here. Laird's brother Callum needed an expert in Norse mythology to help market the island's history, and Granda had books all over the house. That's how I recognized the Edda.

JODY MARSH: So who's chasing you?

RORY: I don't know. Me and Granda were always outsiders here. It was better for a while, but... everyone's talking about the old ways again. Closing in on themselves. I know I've been watched since I found the Edda.

[pebbles rattle]

JODY MARSH: Boulder! Get out of the way! [boulder crashes to ground] Five, Rory, are you all right?

RORY: It's them! They pushed it!

SAM YAO: Yeah, someone's up on the ridge. They're wearing skincoats. You've got to get out of there, you're sitting ducks. Run!

~

SAM YAO: You're clear of the gully. Can't see any skincoats anywhere.

JODY MARSH: Rory, you know more than you're admitting. You need to tell us everything right now.

RORY: Okay. My granda was murdered. Everyone says he drank too much and fell off the cliff, but that's a lie. Someone killed him. [sighs] It was our fifth summer here. We were walking along the cliff. Granda went on ahead. Skincoat came out of nowhere and just... pushed him over. Looked just like in the stories. Gray all over, one thick purple stripe. I told people. My teachers, the police, but no one believed me. They said the skincoats hadn't been around for years. I know what I saw.

SAM YAO: What about Chief Macallan?

RORY: He was just an inspector at the time, but yeah, he took me more seriously than most. He seemed really upset and angry at the idea there was still skincoats. I was just a kid! There was no other evidence. Eventually, I half believed I'd imagined it myself, but... I didn't. People weren't unkind afterwards. The Websters took me in. Still, I've kept to myself ever since. I get lonely, but I cope.

JODY MARSH: We believe you. Why do you think he was killed?

RORY: He did drink a fair bit of whiskey. Enough that he'd tell me things he shouldn't. Island business, like the real reason Callum hired him.

[gunshot, RORY shouts]

SAM YAO: Behind you, a skincoat! How did they get there so fast?

RORY: They've come for me! We have to get away. Run!

~

RORY: You've got to help me.

JODY MARSH: You must be right, Rory. The skincoats killed your grandfather. Maybe they never really disbanded. Maybe they've been acting against us all along!

SAM YAO: Yeah, but who are they? Chief Macallan said there were always nine of them. That the role got passed down in families. But many of those families are gone. So they could be anyone we talk to. People we think are our friends!

JODY MARSH: At least if they're chasing us for the Edda, we can be sure they don't already have it. Maybe that's what Jones was trying to do, in his own twisted way. To keep the Edda out of their hands. Remember what he said just before he died? "Now there'll be no stopping them."

SAM YAO: Rory, you mentioned the real reason Callum hired your grandfather. What was that?

RORY: King of the rocks. Callum wanted to move the ceremony to Niomh because there was oil at the ceremony site on Mor. The islanders respected tradition too much to allow that. But Callum reckoned if a Norse scholar told them it should have been on Niomh the whole time, they'd believe him.

SAM YAO: So Callum paid your grandfather to lie for him. But why would anyone have cared enough about the ceremony to kill him?

RORY: The skincoats were the guardians of tradition, of the old ways. In the stories, they were ruthless and cruel. They somehow knew everything, were everywhere at once. People slit their own wrists rather than be taken by them.

JODY MARSH: Let's get to the Edda. If there's nine of them out there, our head start means nothing. Where is it?

RORY: In a bothy behind that hill. But you have to get me off this island.

JODY MARSH: We will. We'll get to the Edda and get you to safety. Come on!

~

RORY: There's the bothy. The window's broken!

[door creaks open, broken glass clinks]

JODY MARSH: It's been ransacked!

RORY: I had the Edda in a lockbox under the bed.

[metal box creaks]

JODY MARSH: The lock's smashed. It's still in there, bound in white leather and jewels.

SAM YAO: The Edda? Well, we've found the Edda!

RORY: Give it to the Prime Minister! You said she'd help me.

JODY MARSH: Why didn't the skincoats take it? They opened the lockbox, saw the Edda, and left it? Hang on a sec. [paper rustles] This isn't the Edda. I've spent days studying everything we know about it and this doesn't match up. For one thing, these aren't rubies. They're green! And for another, it puts the king of the rocks ceremony on Niomh, not Mor. It's a fake.

SAM YAO: What?

JODY MARSH: Rory, you said Callum paid your grandfather to convince the islanders to move the king of the rocks to Niomh. Don't you think forging an Edda would be a good way for a Norse scholar to do that?

RORY: I'm – I'm sorry. It was my only chance!

JODY MARSH: Aw, Rory, I knew you didn't just find it on the path.

RORY: I had to get off this island! The skincoats control everything. Now they'll know I've talked to you. They'll kill me for sure!

SAM YAO: No, no, look. You can stay with us, Rory. We'll protect you.

RORY: Oh, thank you! Thank God!

[radio static]

AMELIA SPENS: Sam, Jody, I've been listening in, and while I can't say I'm surprised we've been duped for a wild goose chase, I am angry. With myself above all, for believing you or anyone of this fungus-riddle archipelago could be trusted! If I'm to save the UK, you've left me with only one choice. Nisha, switch to all channels.

Hello again, Mor Island. You have wasted my time long enough. The reward is off the table. I am aboard a nuclear-armed submarine, and if I don't get the Edda soon, I am going to launch a warhead and destroy the entire archipelago. You have been warned.

~