#kurosaki-san's single minded love

[soft-manga]

kurosaki-san's single minded love

[shoujo-dump]

Kurosaki-san no Ichizuna Ai ga Tomaranai

[jisatsual]

[ice-kyuubi]

Ongoing mangas that keeps you going ☺️♥️

Omukae Shibuya-kun

Aota Aika is contented with her life as a worker in a nursery. She's single and not dating anyone at the moment. She focused her energy on work and happy with how things are until Shibuya Takai comes her way and changes her perspective.

Sheik-sama to Harem de

Sanagi is a high school girl who has devoted herself to money---that is because she wish to protect and care for her family properly. One day, she met a man who wish to jump off the building where she works. She convinced him not to do it and then the next time they met, the man asked for her hand on marriage. Oh, by the way, the man's name is Prince Lui of Armadia.

Nakanowarui iinazuke no hanashi

Asahi and Kei are engaged couple who don't get along well but is this really how they feel for each other?

Tsukako no Konkatsu Death Game

Suzuki Tsukako is an unmarried otaku who suddenly had an urge to pursue marriage. She thought it would be easy to find a partner if she put her mind into it, however after signing up for a free marriage concierge, she became part of the biggest scam of her life. And what's more? She has to get married in one year or else...she'll die not seeing her favorite 2d idol group!

Unmei no Hito ni Deau Hanashi

Honda Yuuki left the countryside to live alone and study in the city. Now that she's 20, she wants to meet the person who will make her fall in love and so her friend brought her somewhere she could meet other people.

Hikaeme ni Itte mo, Kore wa Ai

On one rainy day, Amakawa Risa found and offered an umbrella to a beaten up delinquent named Oohira Zen. Since then, Zen followed Risa as he intend to return the favor but is't really all he wish to do?

Kurosaki-san no Ichizuna Ai ga Tomaranai

One day, a stranger goes to an onigiri shop owned by Koharu's family. The man, wearing a jacket, who's face is slighty hidden behind his long bangs, suddenly shows up his passbook and says, "I have a billion yen. Will you marry me?". When a man offers to give you fortune, will you choose to marry him?

Dekinai Futari

Kurose Takahito and Shirafuji Nao are sworn enemies, or maybe not? They've known each other since they were kids and even dated in high school however, what could possibly be the reason why they're at each others' throat now?

Enjoy reading! 😁

[hibiscusangel15]

Rumors

Day 22 Prompt: there’s been talk about us

Summary: Rumors chased after Ichigo and Rukia their entire lives. People liked to gossip about their appearances. About their statuses. It was always the trivial matters that rubbed others the wrong way.

And then came the rumors about the nature of their relationship. For Day 22 of @ichirukimonth​ 2021.

Rating: Gen/K

*Also crossposted to AO3 and FFN!

If you like my fic, please consider buying me a coffee!

                                       We fear that which we cannot see.

“Hey, have you heard?”

“That Kurosaki kid—”

“Yes, that Kuchiki girl—”

“No way! A delinquent joining our class?”

“Of course that untalented recruit is a noble. It’s the Kuchiki influence. I thought so, too!”

Rumors chased after Ichigo and Rukia their entire lives. People liked to gossip about their appearances. About their statuses. It was always the trivial matters that rubbed others the wrong way.

And then came the rumors about the nature of their relationship. A bit surprising, to be sure, but not altogether unexpected, given how petty gossip hounds could be. Just another bored rumor passed along the mill that would eventually be forgotten and replaced with something new.

They both denied it as firmly as they could. It never satiated others’ nosy appetites for long.

All those rumors fell away when she was whisked back to Soul Society. They were the last thing on his mind when he and the others fought to rescue her. He’d forgotten about them completely until she and the other Shinigami showed up during the next semester, unannounced, and the rumors started up again.

It didn’t help that she was living with him now, either.

“What’s the deal with you and Rukia-chan anyway?” Isshin asked while helping his son with the dishes. The girls were having fun getting to know each other upstairs, so he figured he’d step in.

Ichigo threw him a peeved side-glance. “What do you mean? She already told you she has no money or relatives here to help her.”

“So you volunteered to take her in without a second thought, huh?”

“You expect me to let her fend for herself?” The defensive edge in his voice made Isshin pause.

He smiled as he took a dish from the rack to dry. “No, of course not. You’ve always been the type to stick your neck out for someone in need. Why do you think your mom and I named you Ichigo?”

Ichigo said nothing, just continued washing dishes. If one good thing could be said about his punk of a son, it was the fact that he never flaunted his inner strength.

“You’ve never really had many friends growing up. For the longest time, the only friend you had was Tatsuki-chan and then Chad. Everyone else was too scared to try and talk to you. So I’m glad you’re putting yourself out there this year and making a bunch of new friends, Ichigo.”

His son’s face softened.

“That being said, you never answered my question, my son.” Isshin’s eyes sparkled with a single-minded pursuit. “Could it be you don’t trust me enough to tell me the truth? Or is it that you're too shy?”

That all-too-familiar scowl returned to Ichigo’s face. “What the hell’re you talking about, Dad?”

“There you go, dodging the question again! I’m talking about Rukia-chan! Is she, y’know, your girlfriend?”

“My...girlfriend?” A dish slipped from Ichigo's grasp and shattered into pieces.

“Aw crap!” he swore, stooping to the floor. “Sorry, Dad!”

Before he could reach for the largest piece, Isshin gently pushed his son's hands away. “Let me handle this, Ichigo. I don’t want you hurting yourself. Go get the trash can.”

“Dad, it’s no trouble. I can get it.”

Isshin paused. “To be honest with you, son, my joints ain’t as spry as they used to be. I probably can’t get up right now even if I wanted to.”

“Oh, what? You’re such an old man,” Ichigo said as he pushed himself up.

At that moment, Isshin slipped a small pill into his mouth. Urahara’s gigai tech might have been impressive when he was first gifted the thing, but damn was it getting more and more unresponsive as he got older.

After Ichigo cleared the shards away, Isshin let his son finish washing the dishes. It was the easiest way to trap him there, at any rate.

“Anyway,” he began again, “what is Rukia-chan to you?”

His son hesitated, brown eyes darting around as if he could pull some bullshit excuse from the murky dishwater.

He covered it up with yet another scowl. “We’re just friends. Sorry to disappoint you and Yuzu.”

“Aw, c’mon, Ichigo! Your sister and I are just curious!”

“You guys are way too keen about my nonexistent love life. Why don’t you two get lives of your own?”

“You kids might not understand this since you’re so young, but when you become a parent, your life revolves around your kids! That means your life is my life, too!” Isshin clenched his fist. “So c’mon, Ichigo! Tell me everything! Don’t be shy!”

“I’m not being shy. Quit bugging me.”

“Oh?” Isshin’s eyes gleamed. “Only a truly shy man would be so cold! Come now, my son! Confess your deepest, darkest secrets to your father!”

As soon as he tried to embrace his son, all turned black as his face rammed right into Ichigo’s elbow.

                                                           * * *

The girls upstairs heard a loud crash and Ichigo’s infuriated cursing.

Karin frowned at the floor. “There they go again. God, it’s so exhausting living with them. Sorry, you’re just going to have to deal with them for the time being.”

Rukia slapped on an innocent smile. “Oh, I don’t mind! I think a lively household is kind of fun!”

Another crash thundered through the house as the two men continued brawling away. Karin sighed. “Fun, huh?”

“I just hope they remember to clean up after themselves! I’d hate to clean the kitchen again when I already did it last weekend!” Yuzu said.

Rukia had heard their muffled fighting before when she hid in Ichigo’s closet. To actually bear witness to the Kurosaki family’s antics was another matter entirely. Compared to the piercing silence of the Kuchiki household, this was a much more comforting change of pace.

“Now don’t take this the wrong way, Rukia-chan.” Yuzu fidgeted on her bed . “But…um….”

Karin tilted her head back with a loud sigh. “She wants to know if you and our stupid brother are dating.”

“Karin!” Yuzu shouted, scandalized.

“It’s what you wanted to ask her since she arrived, right?”

“Dating?” Rukia repeated. “No, we’re just friends!”

“Just friends, huh?” Karin muttered.

“Yes, of course.”

“So you say.”

“Karin!”

“I’m just saying it’d be way more interesting if all this was some elaborate ruse for Ichigo to introduce his girlfriend to the family is all.” She flopped back onto her bed, letting her legs swing freely over the edge.

“That certainly would be more interesting, I suppose,” Rukia conceded. “Unfortunately, that’s not true. No offense to your brother, but he’s too honest to think of doing something like that.”

The three paused when Ichigo’s booming sneeze echoed up to them from downstairs.

Karin smirked. “Friend, girlfriend. It’s all the same to me, I guess.” She pointed a finger at Rukia. “You and I might get along swimmingly once you drop that nice-girl act and be yourself, though.”

Rukia blinked. And here she thought her human girl schtick would work here, too.

The smile that crossed her lips was softer, more natural this time. “You and your brother have the same instincts, I see.”

“I’d say I’m better at reading people than he is. He’s a big dope.” Karin waved dismissively.

Yuzu’s warm smile grew. “Whether you’re just friends with Ichi-nii or something more, I’m still glad to have you in our home, Rukia-chan! It’s nice to have more girls in the house for once!”

Rukia dipped her head. “I’m grateful that you’re letting me stay here without questioning my motives. I hope I won’t be a burden to any of you.”

“If you can keep my brother and my dad in line, you’d be more of a help than a hindrance,” Karin said. “Anyway, Yuzu tends to snore and fuss in her sleep, so I hope you can deal with that, too.”

Yuzu flushed and threw a pillow at her sister’s bed. “Karin! I don’t snore!”

Siblings showed the oddest resemblances to one another from time to time. Karin's teasing grin was so much like her brother's that it made Rukia smile in return. Ichigo then barged into the room and plunked himself on the edge of her bed to hang out with them. They all talked about their day and mocked each other in that special way only siblings could. It was warm and exasperatedly caring.

All those silly rumors that once passed around Karakura High about her and Ichigo dating would definitely escalate if anyone saw her living with him. It didn’t matter to her either way.

For once, she'd found a place where she didn’t have to worry about being judged. Rukia could dare to be happy. She dared to relax and laugh along with them. The Kurosaki family treated her like she belonged, and that was enough.

                                                               * * *

“Wait, they live together? Are you sure?”

“Of course! Kojima-san went to their house the other day to bring Kurosaki all the homework he missed, and he told me that Kuchiki-san was the one who answered the door! And she took it from him on his behalf! Like she was his girlfriend or something!”

“No way someone as pretty as her would be shacking up with a guy like that, right?”

“I don’t know. You remember how she climbed in through the third-story window and kicked him in the face and smacked him around? If anything, I feel sorry for Kurosaki.”

Now those rumors couldn’t be helped either. Rukia needed somewhere to stay, and like a little pest, she wormed her way into Ichigo's home and his everyday life. And with his month-long Vizard training going on, he wasn’t exactly around to put a stop to them.

The rumors really started to get out of hand once Ichigo, his friends, and all those weird kids who joined in the middle of the semester disappeared at the same time. No one knew where they went, or if they were even alive.

Some theorized that they had all dropped out to form a street gang. Others proposed the idea that Kurosaki and Kuchiki-san had eloped and invited all their friends to the wedding. All of which were extremely ridiculous, but who was to prove them wrong? Certainly not the subjects of the rumors themselves.

Oddly enough, both Asano and Kojima were the first to dismiss any rumors they heard. They seemed less enthusiastic about it, like their friend’s love life was no longer a fun puzzle to work out. They hung a lot more around Arisawa, who was equally morose and exhausted with it all.

Of course, this only fueled the wild rumors further. Perhaps they were bummed out that they weren’t included in whatever escapades Kurosaki and his other friends got involved with.

Then Kurosaki returned. Without any of those weird friends of his. Without that odd Kuchiki girl by his side. 

Kurosaki Ichigo became a recluse, even among those he once called friends.

Perhaps they’d broken up. Maybe she had to move away.

The mystique of their relationship died down pretty quickly after that.

It was not until May of their final year of high school did rumors about Kuchiki Rukia returning circulate around the school. Someone claimed to have seen her hanging around Karakura again. With how eagerly Kurosaki cancelled the rest of his sports team contracts to leave school earlier, it seemed more and more plausible.

Inoue Orihime’s own confirmation that the Kuchiki girl was indeed back only fueled the flames. Apparently, Kuchiki Rukia and all the new kids had to move far away all of a sudden. No, they weren’t all a weird family. No, she would not return to Karakura High.

As for the rumor covering Kuchiki Rukia and Kurosaki Ichigo’s relationship status, Inoue, Arisawa, and Kojima were all tight-lipped on the matter. Despite their best efforts, Asano Keigo was not all that great at keeping secrets, and it only took a bit of pressure for him to crack.

“No, they’re not dating! Can you believe that?” he’d screech at anyone who would listen. “I swear, I’ve tried so hard to hook them up, but nothing I do works! Tell me, what’s a guy gotta do to help his dumbass friend score, huh?”

                                                           * * *

Rukia was in the middle of writing up a report when Ichigo decided to show up for an impromptu visit. Admittedly, it was nice catching up with him, but it did wreck her entire work schedule for the day.

Well, perhaps wreck wasn’t the right word for it. She didn’t mind his company. She just normally finished up faster than this.

The odd look her brother threw her when she requested that they be left alone put her off. It did not help that she had flushed when Renji raised a tattooed eyebrow at her before he left, nor the fact that the servants hushed their giggles when Ichigo looked over his shoulder at them.

“Hey, is something going on around here?” he asked after catching the latest servant stifling a smile as she passed. “The servants have been whispering to each other all day.”

That’s because you decided to barge in so blatantly like you live here, you fool, she wanted to say.

Rukia shrugged affectedly. “People like to talk.”

About us, to be precise.

Ichigo scoffed. “People are always talking about me like I’m some kind of freak because of my hair. I’ve never cared all that much about gossip. It’s all bullshit anyway.”

She set her brush down on the inkstone. “I see. You too, huh?”

“Too?” he repeated, finally looking over at her.

“You heard Nii-sama explain why I was adopted into the Kuchiki clan, correct?” She took his silence as a yes. “The Kuchiki name is a prestigious one, but that notoriety does not come without its costs. The moment I was adopted, I was immediately placed in Squad Thirteen despite never having graduated from the Shinigami Academy. I was deemed a product of nepotism, and the other squad members hated me for it.”

Rukia shut her eyes. The memory of Kaien’s warmth flickered in the back of her mind. That would be a story for another day.

“It may seem ridiculous to you, how such a thing could hurt me.” Her smile did not reach her eyes.

He shook his head. “It’s not ridiculous, Rukia. What’s ridiculous is all the stuff people assumed about you. They don’t even know you.”

“No,” she said. “But even worthless rumors can start to take their toll once enough of them build up.”

“Oh yeah? Well, I’m gonna change that.”

Her smile fell. “How so?”

“We’re friends,” Ichigo said without any hesitation whatsoever. “So anyone who talks shit about you gets the business end of my sword.”

“A little extreme, don’t you think?”

Ichigo snorted but said nothing else.

To alleviate the tension brewing around him, she teased, “And what rumors about yourself have you heard lately? I’ve heard quite a lot. I’ve even been asked to confirm a few, on occasion.”

“Yeah? Like what?”

Rukia turned the various rumors over in her mind, struggling to find the best way to spin it. A joke perhaps? Could he laugh off something like this?

No, Ichigo would probably get embarrassed and storm off to find the cretin who started these unsavory rumors in the first place. She would assume such talk was unbefitting of those who served in the Thirteen Court Guard Squads, but apparently she was mistaken.

“Nothing much. Petty gossip.” She continued writing her report as if such matters didn’t concern her at all. “About you and I, mostly. What we are to each other.”

Ichigo scowled. “Not this again.”

“Unfortunately, yes.”

“It’s like people don’t have anything else to do with their lives. Stop trying to live vicariously through us already.”

Rukia paused. “Live vicariously?”

“Yeah, it’s like when people try to experience stuff through—”

“No, I know what it means. But what did you mean by that?”

The moment he met her eyes, she understood. There was a frantic, helpless gleam to them, but even so, he did not dare look away.

It was not a challenge, but more a question. It was a plea. His confession.

“Oh. I see.”

“Look, I wasn’t trying to…. I mean, it’s not…. This wasn’t the way that I wanted to….”

Ichigo put his head in his hands and took a deep breath. When he finally sat up straight again, he looked her right in the eye. “Rukia, do you want to go out with me?”

“Oh?” She leaned her head in a hand, the corner of her mouth tugging up. “Are you sure you want to prove those rumormongers right?”

He scowled. “This isn't about them! I told you, I don’t give a shit about what other people think. It wasn’t the rumors that made me like you.”

“What a bold thing to admit.” She covered her mouth in mock surprise.

“Ugh, shut up! It’s hard enough to say as it is.”

Rukia began to laugh. “You’re so strange, Ichigo. I like that about you, though.”

He tried and failed to hide how red his face had become. “Don’t make fun of me.”

“I’m not.” Her smile became more genuine then as she reached her hand out to his. “I am happy you asked. Although, I hope you know that it is uncouth of you to drop in on a woman unannounced. According to what I read about courting in the World of the Living, it is also customary to have a chaperone along with us on our dates.”

“Yeah, that’s been outdated for centuries now. What the hell kind of books are you even reading?” he scoffed.

“How rude! And here I was, excited to ask Nii-sama to accompany us for our first date!”

“What? Don’t bring Byakuya into this!”

Their silly bickering echoed all throughout the courtyard. Even still, they did not let go of the other's hand.

                                                             * * *

"Hey, have you heard?"

"That Substitute Shinigami and Lieutenant Kuchiki are dating?"

"Why is this news? Weren't they already a couple?"

"Ah, I see! So I was right all along."

Years and years of speculation, only to have the confession be far more mundane than they hoped.

The funny thing about rumors was, once they were confirmed, they lost their appeal extremely quickly.

Another rumor soon came to take its place.

"Kurosaki Ichigo is a noble? No way!"

"Sure, he looks a lot like Lieutenant Shiba, but isn't he just a human?"

"You sure he didn't just marry into the Kuchiki family?"

And so it goes. And so the rumors circled back once again.

                            If you can say that your heart doesn't change

                                               Then that is strength.

                                                                -

                                       No, nothing can change my world.

The only time a petty rumor is actually one hundred percent true lol. But I mean, it's not hard to disprove with the way they're always looking at each other.

I suppose this fic can kind of fit in the same AU as Home and Clearing Away the Rain. Maybe consider it a prequel of sorts, if you like!

Thanks for reading! Until next time!

[tsarisfanfiction]

Fic Rec Bingo

Okie dokie, this is the Fan Rec Bingo - idea courtesy of lightvials on twitter, but I don’t have a twitter that I ever use, so I’m filling it out here instead.  Let’s see if I can fill it all out!

I did, and then some.  To save poor dashboards, it’s all under the cut!  If I know author tumblrs they’ve been mentioned - I know pitifully few so if anyone knows the ones I don’t, let me know so I can mention them, too!

A fic you love without knowing the source material: The Dragon-King’s Temple by Kyral (Stargate SG-1/Avatar the Last Airbender)

Through the spite of the spirits or plain rotten chance, a door that would have been better left untouched has opened. On the other hand, with Fire and Earth as one's allies, sometimes escaping is the easy part. Rated: Gen.  AO3 Archive Warning for Graphic Descriptions of Violence. Characters: Zuko, Toph Beifong, Janet Fraiser, Sam Carter, Jack O’Neill, and more Words: 196311.  Status: Complete

I very rarely read fics without already knowing the canon, but one that I think counts would be a Stargate/ATLA crossover, because I know nothing about Stargate and I have yet to finish ATLA!  This was recommended to me due to the creativity of the author regarding a language barrier (something I always enjoy, and my friend knows that).

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A fic series with a premise that shouldn’t work but it does: Crazy=Genius by blackkat (Bleach/Harry Potter)

Minerva McGonagall isn't about to let Harry go back to the Dursleys after his first year. She finds an alternative, and along the way, Bazzard Black finds that he might have more family left than he'd ever thought. Rated: Teen.  AO3 No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Bazz-B, Harry Potter, and more Words: 21682.  Status: Incomplete

Okay, I cheated and picked a series.  Not my fault blackkat decided to make this universe a series of oneshots rather than a single entity and you’re certainly not getting me to only pick one of the five already published ones.  Bazz-B being a Black and also kinda a wizard is a brilliant concept, and having him adopting Harry is pure gold.  Not sure how crazy Quincy adopting poor, neglected Boy Who Lives works, but it does!

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A fic you’ve reread several times: The Guardian (Director’s Cut) by SGTBrowncoat (Naruto)

Itachi Uchiha receives his first mission in ANBU: protecting a certain trouble making Jinchuriki. He bonds quickly with the boy, but dark forces rise to threaten Itachi, Naruto, and those they care for most. Rated: T.  Canon-typical violence Characters: Uchiha Itachi, Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Shisui and more (includes Uchiha Itachi/Inuzuka Hana background pairing) Words: 35945.  Status: Complete

Back to my first ever fandom, here, and a really fun non-massacre AU fic, with lots of Itachi and Shisui goodness.  There are a fair few ANBU-looking-after-kid-Naruto fics but this is by far my favourite of them!  There is a sequel, but unfortunately it’s not finished and hasn’t been updated in a long time (I live in hope!)

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A fic you still remember many years later: While The Ring Went South by Thundera Tiger (Lord of the Rings)

What happened after the Fellowship left Rivendell but before they came down off Caradhras? Behold the missing scenes. Rated: K+.  Canon-typical violence Characters: Legolas, Gimli, Aragon, Gandalf, the whole Fellowship Words: 149624.  Status: Complete

I refound this fic completely by accident the other week, after first reading it (according to when I favourited it on FFN) in 2011!  It was just as amazing as I remembered, and is really the standard I hold all other LotR fics to, especially ones that involve the entire, pre-Moria, Fellowship.  It has a sequel but sadly that’s not been updated in some time (but again, I live in hope!)

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A comfort fic: There May Be Some Collateral Damage by metisket (Bleach/Harry Potter)

Ichigo’s been ordered to go undercover at a magic school to bodyguard a kid named Harry Potter, and this would be fine, except that he’s about as good at bodyguarding as he is at magic. And he considers it a good day, magic-wise, if he hasn’t set anything on fire. Rated: Gen.  AO3 No Archive Warnings Apply Characters: Kurosaki Ichigo, Harry Potter, Weasley Twins, and more. Words: 61209.  Status: Complete

I have no idea what this means by ‘Comfort Fic’ but if I want a laugh and Umbridge getting a pile of comeuppance, this is definitely the fic I’ll turn to.  As the A/N says: ‘sending Ichigo to Hogwarts is basically the same as swinging a wrecking ball directly into the side of the castle’.  Beautiful chaos is what we get.  Beautiful, beautiful chaos.

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A cathartic fic: See You Again by cookietosser (One Piece)

Rocinante has been through a lot in his life. Adding uncontrollable time travel into the mix? That's just the icing on the cake. Rated: Teen.  AO3 Violence and (canon) Character Death Warnings Characters: Donquioxte Rocinante|Cora-san, Trafalgar Law, Heart Pirates Words: 15755.  Status: Complete

You want to rip my heart out and trample it into lots of little pieces while still making it all better because Law and Rocinante?  Well, this little time-traveller’s wife AU fic is just the one for all that.  Sad moments, frustrating moments, happy moments, all wrapped up in this oneshot!

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A fic you’d print and put on your bookshelf: Thrower of the Dart by Vathara (Artemis Fowl/The Avengers)

What might have happened instead of Artemis Fowl book 6, if it'd happened in the Marvel Universe. Megalomaniacs ahoy! Rated: Teen.  AO3 No Archive Warnings Characters: Artemis Fowl II, Tony Stark, and more Words: 101272.  Status: Complete

It’s long, it’s epic, and it would nestle in perfectly at home alongside my Artemis Fowl books on the bookshelf!  It’s not so much a rewrite of book 6 as a complete replacement of it, with a new plot and an all too familiar villain!

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A fic you associate with a song: Goodbye, Brother by Serena Estelle (Bleach)

Ilforte's final moments as I like to picture them-with his brother. Rated: T.  Canonical character death Characters: Szayelaporro Granz, Yylfordt Granz Words: 3073.  Status: Complete

Might be cheating, because the author actually names a song in their starting A/N, but this definitely brings to mind Exile Vilify by The National, and I fully recommend listening to that (on loop - there is a 10-hour loop version on youtube) as you watch this for maximum tear-jerking effect.

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A fic that inspires you: Magic of the Rose Cross by Awensweth (Harry Potter/D.Gray-Man)

In Harry's 4th year the Triwizard Tournament is brought back to live, but the appearance of a fourth mysterious school about which only Dumbledore seems to know brings new secrets with it for everyone. Who are the students of Rose Cross? Rated: Mature.  AO3 Chose Not To Use Warnings Characters: Harry Potter, Allen Walker, and more Words: 66632.  Status: Incomplete

I have been inspired by many, many fics, but I chose this one in particular because it was the main one that inspired me to join the HP/DGM Triwizard Tournament wave of the early 2010s - indeed, The Combat School is one of my most popular fics, but without this and other fics of the trope, I probably would never have written it!  That’s not to say I’ve copied this fic - aside from the base trope I tried my best to make my own work unique against the others, and hope that I succeeded!  Sadly, this fic is incomplete and hasn’t been updated for some time, but it’s still worth a read.

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A fic that brought you on board a new ship:  Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell by MsChunks (Boku no Hero Academia)

Uraraka and Bakugo have a secret. It’s not what their classmates think it is. Rated: Teen.  AO3 Chose Not To Use Warnings Characters: Bakugo Katsuki, Uraraka Ochako Words: 182478.  Status: Complete

Putting Bakugo and Uraraka together was something I’d never considered, and I started this fic with some trepidation after a friend recommended it to me, but said friend has never steered me wrong with fics and didn’t start now!  Fake dating, Uraraka actually being badass, the most terrifying couple in class 1-A?  That’s this fic.

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A fic you wish could be a movie: Mission Impossible by Loopstagirl (Thunderbirds)

Being selected for his first solo mission should have been exciting for Captain Scott Tracy of the Air Force. But there was something else at play. Something dangerous and deadly. Something that could cost him more than his life. Rating: T.  Warnings: Violence Characters: Scott Tracy, Gordon Tracy Words: 55048.  Status: Complete

Air Force!Scott?  W.A.S.P.!Gordon?  On a joint mission together?  Yes, gimme, gimme, gimme.  Gimme Scott’s awkwardness alone on a boat of WASP personnel, gimme Gordon’s horror when he realises the suicide mission pilot is his older brother, and now give that all to me on screen!  And we can’t forget the Hood, of course!  Might be a bit higher rating than the current Thunderbirds stuff, but hey, I’m old enough.  Gimme.

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A fic that led to you becoming friends with the author: The Gabriel Project by Aceidia (Bleach)  - @thetwelvecaesars​

When Szayelaporro knew Aizen's reign in Heuco Mundo was coming to a close, he took matters into his own brilliant hands. He reincarnates himself and the other nine Espadas into a new life full of surprising turns and irony. Yet, the harmony and ignorance is not forever as they begin to remember. Rating: M (violence) Characters: Szayelaporro Granz, the Espada Words: 116030.  Status: Complete

Well, this fic sparked off a friendship that’s still very much there, even if neither of us write much for Bleach any more!  What started off as a challenge to identify who the Espada were turned into essay-length PMs about anything and everything, and then RP groups and now random emails about whatever at random times of the day (different timezones don’t help)!

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A fic you’ve gushed about irl: Living Like Kings by CLynnB (Thunderbirds)

The world wants to know more about the Tracy brothers. So Lady Penelope takes it upon herself to show the world just who they are. Through YouTube. Rating: Gen.  AO3 Author Chose Not To Use Warnings Characters: Lady Penelope-Creighton-Ward, Tracy Family (background Pen/Ink, Scayo, Virg/Brains) Words: 35348.  Status: Complete

I love social media fics like this one, and my poor boyfriend got the brunt of it while we were on holiday... he knows basically nothing about Thunderbirds except for what he’s heard from me (which is a lot because he’s amazing and lets me gush).  I mean, Tracy boys playing “The Floor Is Lava?” and tackling each other to the ground?  Gimme.

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A fic you associate with a place: Thunderbirds Meet Thunderbirds - Alan trip in to the movie verse by ak47stylegirl (Thunderbirds) @ak47stylegirl​

Crazy stuff always happens to Tracys, don't they?  Add felling into a different world to the list. Rating: Gen. AO3 No Archive Warnings Characters: Alan Tracy, Tracy Family times two Words: 25599.  Status: Incomplete

This might be a little random, but this fic was one that I found while I was ill on holiday to the Lake District last autumn.  Sadly, it’s the only trip there I’ve ever done where I couldn’t climb a single fell (and my car’s clutch burnt out after having to reverse up a pass... thanks bus coming the other way), and this fic’s updates while I was there kept me sane!  This has actually very loosely inspired a fic of my own which is in the making - which might get posted in the next year if I’m lucky...  Still waiting eagerly for this fic’s next update :D

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A fic that made you gasp out loud: The Colours Of The World by MaiKusakabe (Fullmetal Alchemist/Harry Potter)

When Roy Mustang went to retrieve his eyesight from Truth, he wasn’t expecting to end up doing a job in exchange. It couldn’t even be an easy job, of course, because Edward’s assessment of Truth was a pretty accurate one. Rating: Mature.  AO3 No Archive Warnings (but watch for canon-typical violence) Characters: Roy Mustang, Albus Dumbledore, Sirius Black, and more Words: 120578.  Status: Incomplete

Badass Roy yesss.  Twists and turns and Truth is a pretentious you-know-what but Voldemort’s even worse so where does that leave poor Roy except caught in the middle and very much a war veteran at this point... much to the horror of a few wizards!

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A fic you found at the right time: Seafaring Heartless: Exit North Blue by Avian Swallow (One Piece)

Pirates may be considered evil by the majority, but Law had met quite a few of the world's navy who were corrupt to the core and putting up a very thick facade. He reasoned that if he was going to manipulate and scheme his way into that goal, at least he was going to be honest enough to admit it. Rating: T.  Canon-typical situations Characters: Trafalgar Law, Bepo, Penguin, Shachi, Heart Pirate OCs Words: 159644.  Status: Complete

Is there ever a ‘wrong time’ to find a fic?  (a 100k+ at 4am debatable, but shh).  When I craved Heart Pirate content, this fic (and its sequel, still in progress but updating) appeared!  Only loosely clings to canon at the moment, thanks to some SBS revelations, but with well developed OCs to fill the faces we have no names or personalities for at the moment!

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A fic that you would read fic of: Only a Boy by Riddle Lee (Harry Potter/Merlin)

Merlin has changed Camelot forever but while that part of his life is complete, destiny has a new task for him. Now he has to attend Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, hide the fact that he's the Merlin, and defeat a Dark Lord that's messing with magic he knows nothing about. Rating: T.  Canon-typical situations Characters: Merlin, Draco Malfoy, Hermione Granger, and more Words: 340998.  Status: Incomplete

An amazing universe with Slytherin!Merlin, no Harry Potter/Boy Who Lived, and the good old ‘hiding real identity’ trope to underpin the whole series.  Currently just into the start of Merlin’s third year at Hogwarts, aka “The Prisoner of Azkaban”.  This universe has so much to give, although Riddle Lee is doing a fantastic job at it.  It’s incomplete and slow to update but does update!

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A fic that made you laugh out loud: HOW’S THE COMA GOING by ossicle (One Piece)

Kidd and Penguin keep trying to murder each other and Law is done with their shit. He assigns them to take care of each other’s injuries so they’ll learn to get along. It doesn’t work. Rating: Teen.  AO3 No Archive Warnings Characters: Eustass Kid, Penguin, Trafalgar Law (background KidLaw) Words: 2062.  Status: Complete

Oh this one had me in stitches basically the whole time.  Kid’s bedside manner should not be mimicked in the slightest, but a beautiful bonding fic in typical pirate fashion - beat ‘em up ‘til they have your approval.  Poor, poor, Law.

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A fic with a line (or two) that you’ve memorised by heart: On Their Side by Gumnut (Thunderbirds) - @gumnut-logic​

She trusted these boys with a great deal. Rating: Teen.  AO3 No Warnings Apply Characters: Colonel Casey, Virgil Tracy, Gordon Tracy Words: 1116.  Status: Complete

I think I have basically the entire thing memorised.  This one also falls into several other categories, most notably ones that made me laugh and ones that I’ve reread several times, but it really belongs here on this list.

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A fic that gave you butterflies: it’s a long way forward so trust in me by aloneintherain (Miraculous Ladybug)

Six times Marinette carried Adrien (plus one time he carried her). Rating: Teen.  AO3 No Archive Warnings Characters: Adrien Agreste|Chat Noir, Marinette Dupain-Cheng|Ladybug (all sides of the love square) Words: 5611.  Status: Complete

Aaah I have a weak spot for strong!Marinette and this fic ticks that box time and time again, with a side of blushing!Adrien and general love-struck Adrien/Chat.  I mean, what more could a girl need?

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A fic that embodies something you value in life: Team Itachi by Killer of thy Cookies (Naruto)

What if the Third Hokage stopped the council before they could order Itachi to commit the Uchiha Clan Massacre? Itachi is one of the village's strongest ninja, and has now been given the task of being a Jonin sensei, assigned to Team 7 with his little brother Sasuke, the 'dead last' Naruto Uzumaki, and fangirl Sakura Haruno. This is Team Itachi. Rating: T.  Canon-typical situations Characters: Uchiha Itachi, Uchiha Sasuke, Uzumaki Naruto, Haruno Sakura, and more Words: 155092.  Status: Complete

(Yup, another non-massacre AU.)  Loyalty.  Honestly, there are so many fics that have loyalty in them, especially in fandoms like Naruto, where loyalty is a pretty big thing anyway (alongside friendship, of course), but this one is Itachi staying openly loyal to the village because Sarutobi actually saved the clan, and of course lovely bonds between the team!

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A favourite AU: A Son By Any Other Name by carryonstarkid (Thunderbirds)

Cursed as a child, Scott Tracy lives a life in which everyone he encounters must follow all of his given commands. Rating: Teen.  AO3 Chose Not To Use Warnings Characters: Scott Tracy, Tracy Brothers, Kayo Kyrano, and more Words: 83429.  Status: Complete

I rarely read AU fics - my preferred sandbox is the canon one, or a nice slice of canon diversion, rather than completely taking characters out of their home and dumping them somewhere entirely new.  This fairytale AU, however - reminding me very much of Sleeping Beauty except instead of sleeping it’s, well, what the summary says - is fantastically well done and addresses the strain such a thing would put on even the closest of family relationships.

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A fic you stayed up too late to finish reading: As N Approaches Infinity by Corisanna (Bleach/Puella Magi Madoka Magica)

Despairing as yet another timeline goes horribly wrong, Homura wanders into Karakura. There she discovers that while the spiritually-aware people of Karakura were distracted by Ichigo Kurosaki and Xcution, Kyubey had managed to contract the Kurosaki sisters as magical girls. Drawing the attention of the shinigami could be just the advantage Homura needs. Rating: Teen.  AO3 No Archive Warnings but watch out for canon-typical situations for both fandoms (especially Madoka) Characters: Akemi Homura, Kurosaki Karin, Kurosaki Yuzu, Urahara Kisuke, and many more Words: 465297.  Status: Incomplete

There are many fanfictions that have kept me up til dawn.  Many.  This one, however, has literally robbed me of all my sleep and I’ve still been unable to finish it in one sitting.  It’s good, the pacing is fantastic, and with Homura as our leading lady, that means those time resets really hit hard when they happen (and they happen.  They really, really, happen).  Might be incomplete, but is still updating - and there’s plenty to keep you occupied in the meantime!

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A fic that made you feel seen: A Seed Once Grown by Darkestwolfx (Thunderbirds) - @darkestwolfx​

Believe it or not, they did have a garden on Tracy Island. It looked a little like a… tip. And that was being kind. Rating: Teen.  AO3 No Archive Warnings Characters: Ned Tedford, Tracy Family Words: 4785.  Status: Complete

Okay, so I’m taking this literally because I spend a lot of time feeling invisible on the internet so having a fic written for me from someone I’d barely spoken to before was a whole pile of screaming.  Not that it’s the first time someone’s written a fic for me, but the other ones have been done by friends I’d already known for some time, and not someone in a fandom I’m just starting to find my feet in.

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Free space: whoo boy, fun time!  There are a few fics on the top of my head that didn’t fill any of the above prompts (or got beaten to the punch by another), so my wildcard space is going to be a few fic links without the extra detail because I’ve already spent about 12 hours on this to get to this point (did I get sidetracked and re-read a bunch?  You bet) and I’d quite like to also get some fic written today, too!

Eight-Day Week (JoJo Spotting) by TrufflestheMushroom (JoJo’s Bizarre Adventure)

The Trouble With Eastern by teaandtumblr (One Piece)

Remembrance by ClioSelene (One Piece)

Legacy by MaiKusakabe (One Piece)

A Fleeting Smile by AnonymousTwit (Boku no Hero Academia)

Too Loud For Comfort by vaporeon_ninja (Boku no Hero Academia)

A Dragon’s Hoard by Chezka (Boku no Hero Academia)

Nine Lives by P_Artsypants (Miraculous Ladybug)

Chat’s Eye View (Love Letters To Paris) by Icka M Chif (Miraculous Ladybug)

Gabriel’s Lament by Chaotic Neutral (Miraculous Ladybug)

What The Cat Dragged In by Kyral (Avengers/Miraculous Ladybug)

Weekend Warrior by BlackDog_66 (Avengers)

Fitting In (Tiny Spaces) by aloneintherain (Avengers)

Autonomy by beetlebee (Naruto)

Great Minds by ScreamingViking (Final Fantasy VII)

Dear Kunsel by Sinnatious (Final Fantasy VII)

Cracks in the knight by authorettejasmin (Magic Kaito)

To Wrap An Elvish Princeling by Jael (Lord of the Rings)

There are more, many more, and I’ll probably post a few more recs around - you can also find some on my blog and I’ll try and get that updated with a few more at some point because there are many more than that!

[feelingfredly]

Home Is Where You Hang Your Heart

Fluffy/Angsty Goodness for GinIchi WinterFest 2020

Ichigo pulled another handkerchief from his pocket and pushed it across the table. He’d learned to come prepared to these meetings.  “He’s doing fine, Ran. I swear.  Please don’t cry.”

The redhead thanked him and swiped once at her eyes before the cloth disappeared into a shaky fist. “I know, I know,” she sighed and straightened her shoulders, “I just…” her voice faded away and her gaze clouded.  “I just worry, you know?”

Ichigo knew.

Rangiku was a fierce fighter, a bottomless pit when it came to alcohol, and a shameless flirt. She was also a mother hen, a victim of spiritual abuse, and someone still desperately trying to come to grips with the truth about a relationship that had turned out to be nothing like she’d always believed.  It was no wonder she was torn up.

“I don’t want him to think..” She couldn’t even begin to put all the things she didn’t want Gin to think into words.

“What?” Ichigo snorted. “You don’t want him to think that you don’t care?  That you wouldn’t take on the whole of Seireitei if it would make a difference?” He rolled his eyes and Ran gave him a watery smile.  Just like Yuzu and Karin, he thought, she just needs someone to tell her it’s okay. That she’s done enough. “Trust me. He knows.  He also knows that it wouldn’t make any difference.” Ran’s face puckered up a little and he raised a hand to stop her before the tears could start again. “Yet.  It wouldn’t make any difference yet. It’s going to take a long time for people to stop believing the worst of him.”

She nodded and then looked at him, weighing her words. “You don’t believe the worst of him.”

Ichigo settled back in his chair and shrugged. “I’m also the guy with a hollow living in the back of his head who spends all his time with a Visored who turns the world upside down and a banished Captain of the Gotei 13 who I’m pretty sure sells sex dolls out of the back of his candy store.  Some of those housewives that come by regularly are pretty scary.” He shook his head. “Understanding Gin is a walk in the park after that.  But don’t tell him I said that.  It might make him feel like he has to prove something.”

Ran laughed, her first real laugh since they’d sat down together. “Oh no, you wouldn’t want that. The human world might not survive.”

Ichigo thought about Gin laser-focused on teaching him a lesson and struggled to fight back a flush before it gave the woman across the table something else to think about. The last thing he needed—even less than another occasionally sadistic ex-Captain—was a matchmaking Rangiku.  

He lifted his drink in a silent toast, hiding his red cheeks behind the rim of his cup. “You don’t have to tell me twice.”

***

“Here.  I brought some hot chocolate.” Gin handed a wide ceramic cup across to the little girl sitting on the tatami.  She was posed beside a window made of balsa wood and rice paper, a small lamp on the other side giving the impression of winter sunlight streaming in on the puddle of brightly colored silk that wrapped her tiny frame. “If you like it, I have a tin for you t’ take home.  You’ve been so patient.”

A blush of happiness pinked her cheeks. Never too young to appreciate being appreciated, he thought, taking a moment to readjust his camera, or to be susceptible to bribery.

“Is it good, Suzu-chan?” He cocked his head to one side as he asked and the little girl nodded, her face buried in the steamy cup, eyes big as they stared at him over the rim. Perfect.  He snapped another photo.

He kneeled up and moved across to the other side of the mat, moving slowly so as not to startle the child. She’d clung to her mother when they arrived, tears threatening during the long process of putting the layers of the kimono on her, but she’d relaxed after a few gentle compliments and a few sweets.  

“Ah, your hair’s so pretty today.  Did your mother fix it for you?”

The big eyes narrowed a fraction as she nodded. So… not totally susceptible to flattery.  That’s a good girl. Stay smart like that. He looked down at his camera, watching the suspicious look fade from the girl’s face through the preview screen and when she raised the cup again, he snapped another picture.

Gin paused, checking the light and the little girl’s positioning for the umpteenth time.  Suzu-chan’s mother was waiting patiently in the alcove off the set watching and he motioned for her to come over.

“I’m almost finished, but I would like to try to get at least one standing photo now that she’s calmed down.  Could you help her up, please?  She was afraid she was going t’ trip in the hikizuri earlier, and I don’t want her to panic again.”

The woman bowed to him and smiled, creeping over to the little girl and holding her hand out for the cup with a sing-songy, “Kashite, Su-chan?”  The child handed the cocoa to her easily and smiled as her mother helped her to her feet, getting her balance on the tiny okobo before sending a shy smile to Gin, proud of her accomplishment.

“Jus’ perfect, Suzu-chan,” he said, moving so her mother could step away. He ducked in and straightened the hem of the kimono with a practiced twitch. “Stand right there for me.” He focused the camera in his hands and palmed a remote for a second camera on a tripod on the other side of the tatami.  A single press of the button and the camera started taking automated photos on a timer, a hidden eye on the tiny subject in front of him. “Now,” he said, making a production of raising the camera in his hand, “can you bow for me?  Jus’ once, please?”

The little girl looked at him, a fierce look of concentration on her face, and she dipped into a bow so lovely that it would have made a maiko rage with jealousy. The grace of innocence, he thought, taking a final picture of the girl, half-turned away, miniature rice-paper kanzashi swinging beside her cheek.

And then they were done. It took almost as long to remove the hikizuri as it did to put it on, but at least by the end of it the child wasn’t crying.  He bowed deeply to the pair of them and made arrangements with the mother for the finished photo package to be sent for approval before turning to his model and bowing again. “Thank you so much, Suzu-chan.  You made my job so easy, and now you’re all finished.”

A big grin spread across the little face. “Thank you, shashin-ka-san!” She gave him a bow in return. “Do I still get to have the hot chocolate?”

Gin smiled. That’s right, little one, never lose track of what’s important. “Of course.” He nodded seriously. “You’ve earned it.” He handed her the tin and she hugged it to her chest with another bow of thanks before leading her mother back out into the festival in a whirlwind of excitement.

“Another happy customer,” a voice murmured behind him.

Gin didn’t jump but it was close. The gigai from Urahara was many things, but good at reiatsu sensing wasn’t one of them.  Yet another thing to get accustomed to. “All my customers are happy, Kurosaki-kun.  I take pride in my ability,” he tilts his head a fraction and looked at the redhead over his shoulder, “to satisfy.”

He was fairly certain that the color on Ichigo’s cheeks wasn’t from the winter wind. At least he didn’t need to relearn that.

“Clearly,” the younger man said, aiming for cool. “That’s why you’re booked solid for the whole festival.”

Gin walked over to the corner where his computer was set up temporarily, plugging the camera in to download the pictures he’d taken. “You sound surprised, Kurosaki-kun.”

Ichigo shrugged. “I’ll admit that the whole ‘authentic Meiji era costume photography’ thing wasn’t something I saw coming, and the fact that you’re a freaking child whisperer is oddly unnerving, but your success?  No surprise there.  I’m pretty sure you could sell freezers in the Artic if you set your mind to it.”

A bitter retort hovered on the tip of his tongue-- Even without Aizen hypnotizing people for me, Kurosaki-kun?—but he forced it back.  Ichigo didn’t deserve it.  He was one of the most straightforward people Gin had ever dealt with.  It wasn’t his fault that no one else said what they meant.

“I jus’ know what people want, Kurosaki-kun.” He tipped his head to one side. “Like you.  I know what you want, too.”

Ichigo froze like a red deer suddenly faced with a wolf.  It was adorable.

“A-and what do I want, if you’re so smart?” His voice was a little too shaky and Gin could tell he was on the verge of retreating into denial and bluster. He really shouldn’t push so hard. It was just too much fun sometimes.

Gin took a moment to unplug things and slide the laptop into its bag.  He’d work on today’s photos back at the apartment.

“Why the same thing I want, of course,” he said, smiling a little as he caught the bob of Adam’s apple out of the corner of his eye. “Dinner.  It’s been a long day.  You want t’ get takoyaki from the vendor next door, or d’ you have something else in mind?”

Ichigo paused and shook his head like he was trying to clear out cobwebs.

“Takoyaki.” He picked up the now packed computer bag and slung it over his shoulder leaving Gin to lock the little studio up for the night. “I’m starving.”

***

Ichigo bulled his way through the crowd trusting Gin to stick close behind him.  He didn’t look around.  He was sure his face was still red, and he didn’t trust himself to keep his mouth shut if Gin decided to tease him more.

I know what you want, too.

The words echoed in his head, and he wished he could have the moment back, just once, to do something differently, to be brave and face this thing that hung between them.  To admit that yes there was something he wanted, something he wanted badly, and it sure as hell wasn’t takoyaki.

The crowd parted in front of him, his scowl was good for that, and almost before he realized it, they’d made it to the food stand.

Ichigo had never liked takoyaki growing up, but the first day of the festival Gin had pointed out the stand, excited over something in a way that Ichigo’d rarely seen, and he happily let the older man drag him there for dinner after they’d worked up an appetite setting up the studio.  Gin didn’t remember his human life any more than most occupants of Seireitei, but it was clear he’d lived in the Kansai district from his accent, so it made sense that he’d love a food that Osaka was famous for. What Ichigo hadn’t been prepared for was the sheer pleasure on Gin’s face as he ate the little fried bites like he hadn’t eaten in forever.

Just what he needed on top of Gin’s teasing.

The vendor greeted them with a smile and started shoveling the steaming balls into paper boats. “I have something for you Ichimaru-san,” he says, handing over a little dark pot along with the takoyaki.  It smells sweet and sour and like citrus and vinegar.

“Ponzu!” Gin looked like one of the kids he took pictures of, all pleased smiles and gracious head tilts. “Thank you, Sato-san!” He drizzled it generously over his boat and breathed in deeply, his enjoyment clear on his face. “This smells amazing!”

Sato-san nodded with satisfaction. “My wife made it and when I told her you’d mentioned missing it, she wanted me to bring you some.  It isn’t for the menu, but for a good customer like you?” He bowed deeply and chuckled. “I am happy to be able to do this.”

Gin looked almost startled by the kindness and bowed deeply. “Please let your wife know that her generosity was most appreciated.  If there is anything I can do for you—I’d be happy to do a portrait for her if she’d like. I have a new kimono that needs a model.”

The vendor laughed. “My Himari would be too embarrassed for something so grand.  Your happiness is all she wanted, Ichimaru-san.  I will pass along your compliments, though.  A little flattery goes a long way, you know.”

Ichigo watched as a shutter closed across Gin’s face, the pleasure banking into something more polite and less real.

“Absolutely, Sato-san. It is even better if it is true, though, and it is.  Thank you again!  I’ll see you tomorrow.”

He handed Ichigo his boat and bowed again before leading them to one of the few high-topped tables separating the counter from the crowd.

They stood there enjoying their food, Gin’s quiet mood so different from what Ichigo had been expecting, before he couldn’t stand it anymore.

“He didn’t mean anything by it, you know.” Ichigo waved a chopstick for emphasis.  “He was just trying to be friendly.”

Gin paused for a moment and then nodded. “I know.  It’s just hard sometimes t’ separate the real from the phony.”  He took a bite and chewed silently, staring off into the crowd. “I’m tired of the lies and the manipulation. I just want people to know that I mean what I say. I want it to be real.”

Ichigo nudged him under the table with his knee. “It is real, and they know you mean what you say. A little bit of flattery isn’t the same as lying, it’s just…  social lubricant.”

Gin made a noise in his throat and Ichigo could feel the heat returning to his cheeks. “I see. And lubricant is something you’re familiar with Kurosaki-kun?”

“Bastard. You know what I meant.” His flush got worse and Ichigo couldn’t help but be thankful for the cold breeze blowing.  He could pretend his face was just…  wind-chapped. Right. “I guess what I was trying to say is that I know what it’s like when someone doesn’t do it, like Isshin. Or can’t do it, like me. Do you have any idea how many fights I could have avoided if I’d just learned how to say things differently?  How many feelings I wouldn’t have hurt?  How many times Karin wouldn’t have stomped on my foot because I said something completely honest and still managed to completely miss the point of what I was trying to say?”  He snorted and picked up another takoyaki.

“You missing the point, Kurosaki-kun? Surely not.” Gin teased, and Ichigo felt the tightness around his chest loosen a little.  It was working.

“You have no idea.” He shook his head ruefully, perfectly willing to humiliate himself if it made Gin feel better. “One time I told her homeroom teacher that Isshin couldn’t make it to the parent/teacher conference because the yakuza thug with the stab wound was more important than she was. Completely true? Yes.  Totally honest? Absolutely.  Utterly the wrong thing to say? Hell yes. We had three social services visits that month because I was too stupid to realize what that would sound like to someone that didn’t live my life. Being able to spin things a little would have been a godsend.”

Gin sighed and pushed his empty takoyaki boat away from him. “After everything I did people don’t see it that way.  As harmless spin, I mean. I lived a lie for more than a hundred years.  My best friends… the people I loved... None of them could tell the difference, and now that they know that the person they thought I was never existed, they doubt everything I say.  Honestly, I don’ blame them.”

The tightness squeezed Ichigo’s heart again, and he made an aborted reach across the table to touch Gin’s hand. “I get it. I really do. You’re better at double-talk than most, and you haven’t always been the most honest guy in the world, but now you’re using your skills for good instead of evil, so it’s different. You don’t have to be so afraid of just being yourself, you know. Especially not with me. And if they can’t tell the difference?  Fuck ‘em. Just be you.  The people that care will figure it out.”

Ichigo popped the last fried dough ball in his mouth deliberately. He had learned a little bit about shutting up over the years, even if he wasn’t good at the whole moderated-honesty thing, so he chewed and waited.

Gin didn’t say anything for a few minutes and Ichigo was afraid that once again he’d managed to make things worse rather than better.

“You make it sound so easy, Kurosaki-kun.” His voice was almost wistful under its normal layer of snark.

Ichigo shrugged. “It doesn’t have to be hard. Just, I don’t know… treat people the way your treat the kids you take pictures of. Tell them what you want. Say thank you when you get it. Be firm but fair. Oh, and don’t let Hirako talk you into going to jazz bars, and never drink anything Urahara hands you.  Simple.”

Pale blue eyes peered at him through dark blond lashes. “Only you, Kurosaki-kun.”

Ichigo frowned. “Only I would what?”

Gin shook his head and gave one of his closed-mouth smiles, clearly pleased but also clearly unwilling to explain.

Well, at least he was smiling.

***

Ichigo puttered around in their little kitchen and Gin could hear the sound of the tea tin and the kettle. It was amazing how comfortable he’d become sharing his space.  He hadn’t felt this way since he and Ran shared the back room of a little inn in the Rukongai where the innkeeper was kind enough to let them do errands for a space of their own, however small.

“I told Yuzu that we’d come for dinner Sunday evening. She found a recipe for dojima roll that she wants your opinion of.”  

Ichigo had stopped asking if Gin wanted to do things once he realized that the answer was always going to be some form of no. He insisted that interaction was necessary if Gin was going to survive staying in the human world and that his family and friends were the least likely to cause problems if he slipped up and spoke of things that humans wouldn’t—or shouldn’t—understand. It didn’t seem to occur to him that their familiarity with Seireitei and the problems with Aizen meant that his family and friends were also the ones most likely to have a problem with him in the first place, or that it might be hard for Gin to sit across the table from Isshin, Ran’s old Captain, and pretend that nothing was wrong, pretend that he didn’t know that the man would prefer anyone else for his eldest child.  

“You know I appreciate the offer, but I can’t. Please apologize to Yuzu for me.”  Gin kept his voice even. “It’s the last weekend of the Winter Fest and I have a full day of sittings scheduled…”

His voice trailed off as Ichigo wandered out of the bathroom. He had a towel draped over his shoulders, his hair still wet from the shower, and Gin didn’t think he’d ever seen him so at ease. The water darkened the spiky locks turning the natural orange into something softer, and his eyes glowed amber against his tan. It took his breath away.

Luckily, Ichigo had no clue about the effect he had.

“You don’t have to worry about that. I checked the schedule and you have the second set of Shima portraits to do in the afternoon—the youngest boy I think. You had him down for the hitatare, although why anyone wants to put a three year old in a samurai outfit is still a mystery to me—but you should be done with him by four and then it’s just back here to drop off the equipment, and then I can open a garganta from anywhere so we won’t have to worry about travel time, and…”

Gin held up a hand and Ichigo ground to a halt. “Kurosaki-kun, please.”

Something in his voice made the redhead frown. “What?”

He stilled himself, the shallow smile he’d worn for years hovering, but he forced himself not to give into the lie. He could do this. “I just… don’t think I should go.  I appreciate the invitation but, no. Not this time. Thank you.”

A light dimmed in Ichigo’s eyes and Gin wished he could take his words back, but this was for the best.

“Oh,” the spiky head nodded, and he could see the shudder of a breath drawn too deeply too fast. “Okay. I get it. Simple, right?” There was nothing simple in Ichigo’s response.

“What do you mean, Kurosaki-kun?” Gin tilted his head a little, a tiny whisper of dread shot through his curiosity about what would happen next.

He should have known nothing about Ichigo would play out the way he expected. Slowly the younger man fisted his hands in the ends of the towel, pulling it tightly over his chest, and he shrugged, too casually, before answering.

“It’s like I said. You’re telling me what you want—firm and fair—and saying thank you. Couldn’t be much clearer.  Sorry if I was making you uncomfortable, I just…” he looked away, his composure slipping into something soft and hurt.

Gin wanted to tell him, wanted to explain that he hadn’t made him uncomfortable, that Gin was being a coward, that he wanted to keep Ichigo to himself, that he dreamed of them hiding away here in Osaka not just for the festival season but always. He couldn’t, though. He’d driven enough distance between people that he cared about.  He wasn’t going to be the cause of a rift between Ichigo and his family and friends.

“It isn’t like that.” The explanation sounded weak even to him.

“Then what is it like?” The words burst from the younger man. “I don’t understand.  I thought you liked spending time with…”

Me, Gin could almost hear him say, and wouldn’t that open Pandora’s Box?

“I do.” The conversation was quickly becoming something Gin wasn’t prepared to deal with. “It’s just that I’ve been worried.  Your father has been very generous to allow me into his home, but I know it must…”

A twisted bark of laughter split the space between them “You’re kidding. You’re worried about Isshin?”

When he put it that way it sounded a little strange, but Gin remembered the way the Taichō had watched him when he’d pushed Rangiku away.  Remembered the judgment in his eyes.  That kind of feeling didn’t just vanish into thin air.

“He was Rangiku’s captain. He didn’t approve of the way I treated her back then, and I’ve seen the way he looks at me now. I don’t want to cause any more trouble, Kurosaki-kun, and I certainly don’t want to force you to choose between me and your family.”

Ichigo looked at him like he was insane, and maybe he was.  After everything that had happened, it was probably a foregone conclusion.

“First off, Isshin can take care of himself. He isn’t as much of an ass as he seems, but if he has a problem with you, he’ll deal with it his own way in his own time.  Trust me. He learned to deal with the Visoreds, and with Yoruichi, and Urahara, and he’ll either learn to accept you or I’ll punch him in the head until he shuts up, but either way that isn’t something to worry about.”

Gin’s heart stuttered a little in his chest. No one but Ran had ever been willing to fight for him before.

He forced his mouth to form words. “You can’t just punch anyone that doesn’t want me around in the head until they give in, Kurosaki-kun.”

Ichigo stuck his chin out a fraction and met his eyes fiercely. “Try me.”

And, oh Soul King help him if he didn’t want to.

***

He was a grown man.  He would be 200 next year.  He could do this. It was only dinner.

“So, Ichimaru-san,” the bland voice could have hidden a dagger in it, or it could have just been Isshin being polite. “How’s the photography business going?”

Ichigo shifted minutely beside him and Karin shot an under-lashes look at him and he marveled for a moment when he realized that they were both preparing to jump in and defend him.  From a question about his business.  That he was proud of.  

Kurosakis.  They were insane.  The whole lot of them.

“I won’t pretend there wasn’t a steep learning curve, but I’m pleased with it.” Gin sipped his miso and smiled appreciatively at Yuzu who was watching every bite he took. The girl had pulled out all the stops with dinner, making a whole bevy of Osakan favorites in his honor. “There is something magical about being able to capture a moment forever.”

Yuzu nodded when she was satisfied that he like the food well enough. “I love the kimono you designed for Inoue’s engagement portrait. I thought Ishida-san was going to have a stroke when she declared that she wanted you to handle the wedding, but even he was pleased with how the pictures turned out, and you know how fussy he is about everything.”

Gin had been surprised as well, but the Quincy was besotted and whatever his Princess wanted she got, even if it happened to be a disgraced Shinigami as his wedding photographer. Although, honestly, the fact that he’d killed a number of traitorous Shinigami was probably a point in his favor as far as Ishida was concerned.

“Matsumoto told me you’d been sponsored by the Sōtaichō himself.” Isshin raised an eyebrow. “Must have made things a lot easier having that kind of backing.”

It was true.  Money made money and Gin wouldn’t have been able to do nearly as much as quickly if he’d been working from zero.  It was a situation that benefitted Kyōraku—human world money wasn’t an issue for the Shinigami, and he’d have one fewer reminder of Aizen and the destruction around him if Gin wasn’t in Seireitei every day—but he was fairly certain that it had been Ichigo who convinced him.

“Indeed,” he nodded and smiled a careful smile, “he wanted me out from underfoot, and the seed money for my business was less than he’s funneled into Urahara-san’s shōten or what he provides for Hirako-san and the other Visored.”

Karin snorted. “I bet. Having you out of sight meant he didn’t to have to explain to everyone that you were smarter than everyone else and had been trying to take Aizen out of the picture before the rest of them ever got their heads out of their asses.”

Isshin made a startled noise and snapped his eyes across the table to his daughter; she glared right back at him. “You know I’m right.  And anyway, what was he going to do?  The amnesty wouldn’t have protected Ichimaru-san from the nuts in Seireitei that wanted a scapegoat, and he couldn’t just dump him in the human world without having his presence draw every hollow within a hundred miles.  He had to make a deal with Urahara-sensei, and you and I both know that he wasn’t going to do anything without some cold, hard, bankable reasons for helping the Gotei 13 after all the ways they’ve screwed him over.”

Isshin choked on a laugh. “You know, sometimes I think that letting you work with Urahara might not have been the best idea I ever had.”

Yuzu shoved a bowl of yakisoba at him with a huff. “Like it was ever your decision.” She looked at Gin and smiled, as sweet to him as she’d been gruff to her father. “We would have found a way to study with Urahara-sensei no matter what Dad said.  He just went along with it because he didn’t want to look like a pushover because we went behind his back.” She shot a pointed look at her brother. “He’s learned to pick his fights.”

Ichigo couldn’t smother his own grin at that. He was so proud of his sisters and he’d trained them to stand up for themselves no matter what.  Gin knew that if they wanted to study with the Shinigami, Isshin wasn’t going to be able to stop them.  Ichigo would never allow it, and from what he’d seen of Karin and Yuzu, he might not even have needed to step in.

Isshin sighed dramatically. “You see how they are?  So stubborn,” he smiled at Gin for the first time, a sharp little glint hinting in his eye running counter to the broad grin, “they get it from their mother.  Just like Ichigo. Once they get something in their heads there’s no talking them out of it.  No matter how dangerous it might be.”

You’re a bad influence on my son, but I know him well enough not to push.  He’d dig his heels in and be even more on your side, and I’m not dumb enough to do that, no matter what people might think of how Shibas handle things. Gin could almost hear the wheels turning.  He could play that game, too, though.  He’d spent enough time with Aizen that he could probably carry on twelve-layer conversations if needed.

“Luckily, all three of your children seem to be blessed with the uncanny ability to accumulate allies who will back them up no matter how dangerous the situation they find themselves in.” He smiled at the girls, wide and guileless, and he forced himself not to respond to the disbelieving snort from the redhead sitting beside him. “I know that there are at least half a dozen Captains willing to fall in line and ask how high if any one of them said jump.”

You don’t have to worry about Ichigo.  There is a line of people willing to remove me from the picture in an instant if I hurt him.  Gin let the smile drop from his face and actually met Isshin’s gaze, waiting until the man recognized the message and nodded once, satisfied at least for the moment.

“Have you seen Matsumoto-san recently, then?” Gin changed the topic, remembering what Isshin had said about them discussing Gin’s sponsorship.

The ex-captain nodded. “She drops by every now and then. Now that she’s forgiven me for disappearing on her.”  He sighed. “Neither of us have been very good to her, have we, Ichimaru-san?”

There was a pain in the other man’s voice that echoed in Gin’s chest.  No.  Neither of them had been very good to Ran, no matter how much they cared for her.

Ichigo spoke up.  “I saw her yesterday.  She needed help with something Hitsugaya wanted her to set up in the training yard at the tenth.”

Gin looked at him and noticed there was a bit of flush along the tips of Ichigo’s ears.  Like something was embarrassing him.

“Aw, did she flash her boobs at you again, Ichi-nii?” Karin teased, also having noticed the redness. “If she keeps doing that you should have Toshiro reprimand her for sexual harassment.”

Ichigo’s face was burning now. “It wasn’t like that at all.  She hasn’t flashed me in…”

Amber eyes shot up to aqua ones and Gin couldn’t figure out what the panicked look in them meant.

“We set up some new kidō exercise targets and then had lunch. She offered to feed me because I’d done her a favor and we hadn’t talked in forever.” He glared at his sister. “That was it, and don’t start threatening to talk to Toshiro just because you want an excuse to talk to him. Ran doesn’t need any more trouble.”

Yuzu stood and headed for the kitchen, probably to bring out the dessert she was so excited about, but Gin couldn’t take his eyes off Ichigo.  There was something strange, there.  He hadn’t seen that kind of reaction in him in a long time.  Not since… well, not since he’d defended him.

Karin stood to help her sister with a huff. “Fine.  But you shouldn’t let her treat you like that.  I’ve seen the way she gets all handsy and flirtatious when she’s out. It’s bad enough when it’s someone like Hisagi-san that she’s already had a relationship with, but she needs to know that there are boundaries that aren’t cool to cross.”

“I can take care of myself, Karin,” Ichigo said.  “You’re just jealous because Toshiro gets an eyeful just standing next to her. It isn’t Ran’s fault.”

It was true, the younger Kurosaki was obviously jealous, her feelings for the snow prince out there for everyone to see, but Gin couldn’t explain away the curdling feeling in his own stomach at the idea of Ran hanging on Ichigo, drunk and flirtatious, her copious charms on display. She was beautiful, and Ichigo was only human, after all.

Ichigo tapped Gin on the shoulder, the warm hand pulling him from his reverie. “Look.  Yuzu’s dojima roll.  She’s been waiting for this for forever.”

Gin leaned into the touch a little, ostensibly to get a better view of the tray Yuzu was carrying and the heat of Ichigo’s skin almost scalded him he was so hyperaware of it.

And I’ve been waiting for this forever. The thought sucker punched him, and he couldn’t stifle a gasp.

“Everything okay there, Ichimaru-san?” Isshin asked, his eyes taking in the closeness between Gin and Ichigo.

Gin shoved it all down into the box where he kept all his emotions, refusing to let his feelings cause yet more problems.

“Of course, Kurosaki-san,” he said with a tilt of his chin, pulling his phone out of his pocket as a distraction. “I was just surprised by Yuzu-chan’s skills once again.  That looks amazing.” He lifted the phone enquiringly. “Could I take a photo, please?  It’s just too lovely not to record for posterity.”

Yuzu smiled brightly enough to not need extra lighting, and Gin was thankful that the dojima roll was, actually, impressive enough to merit his attentions.  He spent a few minutes fussing over it and Yuzu, taking different pictures and letting Karin tell him about the other roll cakes that had failed and been passed off to Jinta at the shōten. Gin smiled and nodded and allowed the noise to wash over him as he slowly reassembled his shattered reality around his newly recognized feelings for the man sitting next to him.

He put the phone down and picked up his plate, nibbling at the sweet to make it last as long as possible before he had to face Ichigo alone on their trip back to their apartment.

It was ridiculous how obvious his feelings were when he stopped and actually looked at them; he wondered if they were that clear to everyone else.  Isshin’s comments could have easily been a shovel talk, and he’d gotten similar don’t fuck with Ichigo lectures from several of his friends. Probably worst, looking back, had been the hand pats and understanding looks he’d gotten from Orihime. She’d said “Once Ichigo decides someone is worth caring about you just have to let him. He isn’t going to stop; he just takes a while to figure things out. So, be patient with him. Okay, Ichimaru-san?”

He takes a while…?  Gin would have laughed if he didn’t think he wouldn’t be able to stop.

They stayed like that for a while, the wound-spring-tightness of his nerves slowly relaxing as they finished dinner and prepared to leave.

“Ichimaru-san!”  Yuzu piped up from the table where she was standing. “Don’t forget your phone. Can I get a copy of that photo you took?”

She dragged her fingers across the screen and the phone lit up, and as quick as a striking cobra she was flipping through the icons searching for the camera function.

“Oh, here they are. I’d just sync the phones, but mine is charging upstairs and I…”

She stopped, staring at the photo library and Gin wondered what she’d seen.  He didn’t use the camera for much, just random candid shots. He’d taken a lot of pictures of the displays at the Winter Festival, the lights and the people.  Nothing special.

She flipped through screen after screen, her eyes getting bigger until Karin reached over and snagged it from her.  

“Here, let me look. It can’t be that hard to find.  I mean, he just took the pictures an hour ago.”

She looked down at the screen and then back up at her sister, sharing some twin mind-meld apparently before Karin stopped on one photo in particular and pulled it up.

“Ichi-nii,” she said, looking over at her brother where he was gathering their things to leave. “You should see this.”

Something heavy settled in Gin’s stomach.

“Sure, what is it?” He noticed that it was Gin’s phone in his sister’s hand. “Don’t tell me you stole his phone.  Come on, what are you?  Twelve?”

He reached out and as she dropped it in his hand Gin caught a glimpse of the screen.

It was Ichigo standing at the window of their apartment, the dawn sky casting a slanted light over his grinning face. He remembered the moment—they’d been laughing after breakfast, getting ready to open the Festival Studio, and Ichigo had been so striking in the half-light, the expression on his face so clear and bright, that Gin couldn’t resist taking his picture, even as Ichigo groaned and complained that he always looked stupid in photos, and why did Gin insist on doing this to him.

It was an attractive picture, no doubt, but he didn’t understand why it seemed to affect the girls so much.

Ichigo didn’t understand either, apparently.

“Huh, this one turned out pretty good.” He looked at Gin and rolled a shoulder. “I guess you’re good enough at this photography thing that you can even make me look okay.”

The girls were still doing the silent conversation thing and Isshin had caught on.  He took two of his oddly graceful strides across the room and took the phone from Ichigo, looking at the image that was causing all the fuss.

First came surprise, but hard on its heels was something else, something softer, and Isshin’s whole stance changed as he looked up.  He looked at Gin and paused before asking. “You think I could get a copy of this one?” He waggled the phone to indicate the picture and Gin nodded. “Don’t have any recent pics of Ichigo for the scrapbook, and Masaki would love this one.”

Ichigo snagged the phone and groaned. “Come on, old man, it’s just a picture.  Gin takes tons of them.  It’s no big deal.”

“But you’re smiling, Ichi-nii.” Yuzu’s voice was quiet. “You were smiling in all of them.  I don’t think we have any pictures of you smiling. Not since…  well, not since you were little.”

Not since his mother died, Gin filled in. The girls were looking at him intently, an almost painful hope on their face. He understood. He’d do almost anything to make the redhead smile, too.

“Well,” Ichigo was pinking around the edges again, the silent conversations finally making him too uncomfortable. “I guess he’s just good at getting me to smile.  The sign of a good photographer, right?”

Isshin nodded. “Still. I’d like a copy.  Sometime. There’s no rush. It’s not like you won’t be coming back for dinner next week, right Ichimaru-san? I’m sure Yuzu would love to use you as a guinea pig for more of her new recipes.”

Something settled between the two ex-captains with the invitation, an olive branch extended. Isshin was willing to bury the past because somehow Gin had made his son happy and he would do anything to help keep him that way, and Gin… well, Gin was no fool. The girls watched him, looking like they expected him to run from whatever this silent agreement was, but all Gin could think was that they weren’t going to fight to keep him out of Ichigo’s life, and for that he would put up with a thousand family dinners.

“I’d be delighted.  Have you ever had persimmon bread, Yuzu? Karin? I’ll bring some with us the next time we come. You’ll love it.”

***

“Tonight is the last night. You should get to enjoy the festival a little instead of just working through it.”

Ichigo had been wheedling and coaxing for the past two days saying that Gin needed to relax a little, that he’d been working too hard.  The truth was, Gin had been using work to hide from this thing that was threatening to consume him.  He would see Ichigo over breakfast and long to brush the soft spikes of his hair down. He watched from the protected corner of his workspace, two monitors hiding his face as he spied on the other man reading or playing video games or sketching.  He would lose his train of thought as he was matching silks for his costumes because a color would remind him of Ichigo, and at night? At night his dreams were haunted by aches that he hadn’t allowed himself to feel for decades.

“You know I have clients scheduled right up until five, Kurosaki-kun.” Gin couldn’t help but laugh at the pout that flitted across Ichigo’s face.

“Well, then, just promise that you’ll meet me for dinner as soon as your last appointment is finished. You don’t have to break down the studio until tomorrow.  Classes have been over for six weeks and I still haven’t gotten to really celebrate having survived another year.”

Gin gave him a snake-sharp smile. “I see.  Since that’s the case, I suppose I can make time.  It isn’t safe to let you loose unsupervised.  You’re like an unsupervised toddler…  someone will give you a puppy and an espresso and then we’ll all be doomed.”

Ichigo laughed.  “I’d point out that you’re the one that’s good at wrangling toddlers, but I don’t want to be wrangled.  Although, if you followed me around like a puppy, I probably wouldn’t complain.”

Gin’s heart was imitating a taiko from the twilight kumidaiko performances, slowly ramping up to a ferocious pace before dropping off and then starting up again without warning.

Ichigo was dressed in black trousers and a long black jacket that looked surprisingly like his bankai robes and Gin had been caught staring more than once.  It must have been welcome, because the redhead’s usual awkwardness in the face of that kind of attention had turned into a terribly attractive swagger of confidence that Gin wanted to inspire in him again and again.

He was so attractive, and not just physically.  It was as if a gravitational field surrounded him, that pulled people towards him, and Gin longed to stop fighting and let it pull him closer and closer until there was no space left between them, to let the whirlpool that was Ichigo Kurosaki suck him under, surround him, and drown him.

“Is this a special occasion?” he asked, his voice light and still teasing. Ichigo paused and then nodded once, slowly.

“Sort of.”  He didn’t explain, but his face was pink, and Gin didn’t think it was from the cold.

“In that case, how can I say no?”  He bowed, an almost snarky thing from the waist, and Ichigo smiled. “Where shall I meet you?”

Ichigo looked like he’d won a prize and Gin was afraid that his face was turning pink as well.  He hadn’t blushed like a schoolboy even when he’d been a schoolboy.

The things this man did to him.

“Seven, sharp.  At the izakaya row.  We’ll start there and see where the evening takes us.”

“Seven it is, then.” Gin watched Ichigo scoot away, obviously following plans that only he knew, and turned and headed into the studio, a spring in his step and a smile on his face.

Tonight, he would tell Ichigo how he felt, and if he was right, he wouldn’t be alone in his feelings.

***

Ichigo was walking on air.

Gin had finally agreed to go out with him, a night on the town…  or at least on the festival.  The izakaya alley would be a start with something to eat and then they’d get hot shochu and wander down to the light tunnel and look at all the displays.

He knew he hadn’t been imagining the looks being sent his way, and he certainly wasn’t imagining how those looks set his pulse racing.  It was more nerve-wracking than battle in some ways; he wasn’t inexperienced, but he’d never felt anything like this.

Which is why he called in reinforcements.

“I want it to be perfect, Ran.”  

Ichigo appreciated the older woman’s willingness to help, but he was worried that she was going to turn it into a side-show.  She wasn’t exactly known for her tact.

“Are you sure about this, Ichigo?” She’d been waiting for him, slowly—or not so slowly—making her way through a bottle of something alcoholic, and the wobble in her voice indicated that things were likely to get a little emotional.  She was Gin’s only family, though, and if Gin could run the gauntlet at the Casa Kurosaki, he could deal with a sauced sister.

“I’ve never been more sure, Ran.” The words came easily, and Ichigo was almost surprised by the depth of truth in them. “Watching Gin get comfortable in his own skin over the past year has been amazing.  Getting to see him puff out his chest and posture with tiny samurai or soothe a tiny tearful geiko?  I can’t even begin to explain how it makes me feel.  I have to give this a try.”

Ran looked at him seriously, her gaze taking his flushed face and shining eyes. “And if he doesn’t feel the same? I’ll be honest, Ichigo.  I can’t remember the last time he let anybody close enough to do more than have a quick tumble. Kira moped after him for decades, you know.”

Ichigo swallowed hard. “Yeah, I know. If he doesn’t feel the same way, it’ll be rough for a while. But I’ll be graduating next year, and I can find another apartment.  He’s doing well enough that he can hire an assistant if he needs the extra help, so he won’t have to deal with me at all if he doesn’t want to.  I’m not going to take my disappointment out on him, if that’s what you’re worried about.  That wouldn’t be fair.”

Ran shook her head. “Every time you open your mouth you either make me think you’re stupid or you’re perfect.”

Ichigo rubbed the back of his neck. “Which is it this time?”

Ran leaned forward and put her arms around him, embracing him tightly and planting a kiss on his cheek. “Right now, I’d say you’re pretty damn perfect, Ichigo Kurosaki.”

They stood like that with the crowd parting around them, and Ichigo laughed, wrapping his arms around her as well.

“You really think it might work?” He looked down at her and grinned as she nodded.

“He’s smart enough to know a good thing when he sees it, and you are definitely good for him.”

Ichigo couldn’t hold his happiness in and swung her around like his would one of the twins, his heart filled with anticipation.

“Thank you Ran,” he said, setting her back on her feet, “I can’t tell you how much I appreciate your support in this.”

Rangiku punched him in the shoulder and stepped back. “Don’t get too comfortable. If you screw up, I’m still going to tell your dad.  And Renji. And Rukia.  Believe me, I’ve thought this through.”

Ichigo grinned.  “You wouldn’t be Gin’s sister if you hadn’t.”

***

The irony settled on him like a weighted blanket.  His last appointment had cancelled—the child had come down with a cold—and Gin had been so excited to get to Ichigo early. He’d changed clothes—Ichigo had once seen him in a traditional kimono and had been enthusiastic in his praise, and whether it was just because it was a fine outfit or whether he thought it particularly attractive on Gin, he thought it would be a nice surprise since Ichigo had gone to such pains to dress up as well.

He’d chosen a gray silk montsuki and black hakama, something close to his shihakusho, and if he found comfort in it, then no one else needed to know.

The comfort hadn’t lasted.

He walked out of the festival grounds, just picking a direction and going.  He didn’t know where he was headed, he just needed to get away.  Clouds had moved in and the wind had picked up and the chill nipped at his skin.  He barely noticed it.

The snow crunched under his feet.  It was strange to make so much sound—his gigai made more noise than his reiatsu-silenced steps ever did—but everything was strange in the human world.

It was cold.  His fingers were trembling and blue.  He couldn’t feel them.

He couldn’t feel anything.

That wasn’t true.  He felt pain.  Pain that he hadn’t felt since he died in Ran’s arms, her scalding tears hot on his face. His blood hot as it gushed around her fingers.  

That pain was icy now.

He forced one foot in front of the other, following the path carved into the snow by hundreds of other people. The sounds of the festival surrounded him, but they seemed distant. Muffled.

The only thing he could hear was Ichigo’s laugh.  It echoed through his memory, clear and warm and everything he’d ever wanted to hear and nothing he ever wanted to hear again.  It hurt too much when he was laughing for someone else.  

Laughing for her. With her.

He hadn’t meant to spy—honestly—he’d left the studio early hoping to pick up two of the ridiculous hot chocolates that Ichigo had become so fond of as a surprise. He thought…. Well, it didn’t matter what he thought.

But Ran?

It wasn’t that he couldn’t understand someone loving her—he’d loved her forever—but…  Ran? She was everything Ichigo rolled his eyes at in his sisters, all the over-the-top emotions and the talking and the teasing and the laughing.

Oh my God, the laughing.

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d laughed. No, that wasn’t true either.  He’d laughed over dinner when they hadn’t ordered enough takoyaki and he’d managed to distract Ichigo long enough that he stole the redhead’s out from under his nose without him noticing. He’d laughed at Ichigo’s ridiculous Chappy pajamas—a gift from Rukia—when he’d run out of clean laundry. He’d laughed at the frown on Ichigo’s face when he realized that Gin had taken a picture of him cooing over Orihime’s new pet rabbit.

He supposed it was only fair that Ichigo would prefer the company of someone that could make him laugh, too.  

His shuddering exhale surrounded his head in a cloud of fog.

It made sense in other ways. Ran asking for his help would explain why Ichigo’d invested so much time and effort in getting Gin on his feet. Helped him adjust to the human world. Certainly made more sense than him wanting to do it for Gin. They barely knew each other, and what they did know… well, it wouldn’t inspire kindness.

The weight of his thoughts dragged at him, just as the wet fabric of his hakama were dragging at him. His zori were soaked, tabi ruined in the snow, and he was cold.  So cold.

And tired.

Maybe if he sat down and rested, just for a few minutes, he would be able to think of something else. Figure out what to do next.  Right now, though, he just needed to rest. He just needed to close his eyes and pray he’d stop seeing the only two people he’d ever loved laughing together.  

Without him.

***

Ran was crying again.

She was always crying around him.

“Stupid. Stupid. Never thought I’d be so happy that Urahara was a paranoid mad scientist. Never would have found you without the gigai’s tracking signal.  Stupid. What were you thinking?  Were you thinking?  If you didn’t want to date the boy you didn’t have to do something this drastic, and this was drastic even for you.”

The words ran together, like water over stones.

“Kurosaki thinks you hate him. That somehow he pushed you to this. But I know you don’t hate him. I know you don’t hate him. Maybe you hate yourself.  Maybe you hate being banished to the human world. But you don’t hate him.”

The only person Gin hated was Aizen, and he was out of the picture, so she was right.  He didn’t hate Ichigo.  Could never hate him.

“I swear, if you don’t die from reishi loss, I’m going to kill you.  Isshin is going to kill you.  Gods, that little almost spiritless one, the one with the red hair like Kurosaki? I think she was planning on chopping you up into stew before she remembered this body was just a gigai.”

Yuzu was going to turn him into stew?  Why would Yuzu be angry with him?  He didn’t do anything.

“He isn’t eating.  He isn’t sleeping. All he does is stare at the wall like a zombie. You’ve been unconscious for three days, Gin. Three days. You’ve got to wake up.  You’ve just got to wake up.”

A warm hand rested over his. He could feel the too smooth skin of a gigai, no sword callouses on her fingers.  So, Urahara was keeping busy.  Maybe Ran could keep this one so she could stay in the human world with Ichigo.

“I just got you back; I can’t lose you again, Gin. And Kurosaki,” she sucked in a shuddery breath, “I don’t know what he’s going to do.  I just don’t know.  He loves you so damn much.  I think he might love you more than I do.  So why? Why did you do this to him? To us? Why didn’t you just tell him no?”

She was crying again, her hands grasping his hard.

He loves you so damn much. Gin replayed her words, and something lurched in his chest.  What did that mean?  What did she mean? He forced himself up through the layers of exhaustion and weakness, swimming up through the waves that slapped at his consciousness.

“He loves you.” The words were broken glass in his throat, dry and sharp and everything he never wanted to say, but he got them out. “I saw the two of you at the festival. Laughing.”

His eyes wouldn’t open. Apparently Urahara’s gigais had a built-in sense of self-preservation. He knew he’d never survive looking at her face as he admitted what he knew.

A gasp and choking sound caught somewhere in her throat, whether in shock at his having regained consciousness or at what his first words were.

Then the rant began in earnest.

“You’ve got to be kidding me. You unbelievable idiot!” Ran leaned over the bed and slapped his face, once, then twice, until finally Gin forced his eyes open a slit to see her tear-streaked, furious, face. “You mean to tell me that all of this, this hell, is because you saw me laughing with Kurosaki?”

Gin turned his face away, unable or unwilling to continue the conversation.  Reishi loss or not, he could still feel the pain simmering under his skin and Ran clearly didn’t understand.

“Gin,” Something of his pained expression must have registered. Ran started, stopped and then started again, her voice wavering between tears and angry laughter. “Dear, stupid Gin.  He was asking for my blessing.  As your family. He wanted…” a hot tear dripped on his chin as she hovered over him, “he wanted everything to be perfect for you, and that meant making sure that I approved.  Of him. For you.” The last words were practically spat out and he finally looked at her. “What you saw was him incandescently happy because he loved you, you utter, utter fool.”

Time stopped and Gin’s brain kicked in running through everything Ran had said since he’s first regained consciousness.

Oh no…

“Where is he?” the words shook, along with every cell in his borrowed body as he tried to push himself up. “I need to speak to him.  To explain.”

If the pain of seeing him happy with Ran was excruciating, knowing that something he’d done had made him so miserable was infinitely worse.

And Ran…  he tried to raise his hand to her face but still didn’t have enough reishi reserves to operate the gigai fully, so he squeezed her hand where it rested on the bed instead.

“Oh Rangiku, I am so sorry. I can’t seem to stop hurting you.”

Ran leaned in and pressed their foreheads together, her breathing not yet steady but getting there.

“I hadn’t noticed,” she said, a few final tears meandering down her cheeks. “I’m too busy being happy to have my brother back.”

Gin marveled at her forgiveness and swore to himself again that he would do his damnedest to save her from this kind of pain in the future.

“Now,” Ran said, perching on the side of his bed, still holding his hand. “How are we going to fix this, because I’m not letting Isshin kick your ass.  I have my family honor to protect.”

Gin didn’t know.  A hundred years with Aizen had done a lot for his ability to manipulate people, but it sure as hell hadn’t taught him how to grovel, and he was afraid there was a lot of groveling in his future.

If it worked, though, it would be worth it. His pride was nothing compared to Ichigo.

***

Ichigo jumped a little as the alarm buzzed in his pocket.  It looked like one of those coasters the restaurant hostess gave you while you were waiting for a table to open, and he couldn’t help but wonder if Kisuke had liberated a few and repurposed them to run on reishi rather than reinvent the wheel.  It didn’t matter, though.  Kisuke could steal all the gadgets in Tokyo and Ichigo wouldn’t care as long as he let Ichigo keep this one.

This one was telling him that Gin was awake.

He let himself slump against the basement wall, the muscles in his legs refusing to hold him up.  Gin was awake, the gigai was functional, the worst hadn’t happened.  Gin was awake.

It had been a nightmarish couple of days, and he knew people were worried about him. His dad threatened to tie him down to one of the beds in the clinic and hook him up to an IV if he didn’t at least drink some tea and eat the power bar he thrust in his face. Ichigo had, but only because it was easier than fighting. After that, the girls had hugged him and Tessai had checked on him like clockwork, and even Jinta, the little punk, had hovered in the background in case he wanted something.

They figured it out soon enough: all he wanted was Gin.

For twenty-four hours he’d been glued to the bed upstairs, watching for any sign of consciousness—a finger twitch, a breath, anything—but unlike a healing body a gigai was essentially corpse-like in its stillness.  Gin’s pale skin was faded to gray, his hair limp and stuck to his head where it had been soaked with snowmelt and dried haphazardly.

He was a gruesome wax doll laid on a bier, a horrible half-ghost waiting to float away, and somehow… somehow, he was still beautiful. The quiet buzz of Gin’s reiatsu echoed through the room, the only thing that mattered, because as long as Ichigo could feel that, there was hope.

The training ground was dark and quiet except for the new buzzing in his hand.  He’d taken over the basement on day two, at first determined to stay there until the moment Gin waked up, but he became more hesitant as the silent room loomed and questions ate at his mind.

He still didn’t understand what happened—why Gin had wandered out into the storm instead of meeting him as they’d arranged, and he was struggling with the aftermath.

It had taken him hours to realize Gin wasn’t just late he was missing, and then hours more to find him, finally having Kisuke activate Gin’s gigai’s tracker. When he finally found him, Gin was past shivering, so cold that his body had given up trying to warm itself, and Ichigo could vividly remember the bird-bone weight of him under yards of sodden silk as he scooped him into his arms. It was not the way he’d daydreamed of holding him at all, all the joy leached out of it, and he ripped open a garganta straight to the shōten and Kisuke’s labs, turning his precious cargo over to his mad scientist best friend.

Ichigo sighed and levered himself to his feet, shoving the alarm back into his pocket.  It was time. Kisuke had pointed out that Gin might not be up to facing everyone when he woke, and Ichigo was quick enough on the uptake to hear the unspoken you in that message, but it didn’t matter.  If Gin was there, then Ichigo would be there, too.

Being Kurosaki Ichigo came with a lot of baggage, not the least of which was people thinking they understood him, but only three or four actually knew that underneath all the shiny hero stuff he was incredibly selfish.  He fought for who he loved and what he wanted and what he believed, and if someone else didn’t like it, then screw them.  Whether Gin ever shared his feelings was immaterial.  The truth was that Gin was his, and he would do whatever he had to to keep it that way.  If that meant keeping his feelings to himself, he could do that.  If it meant giving the other man space, fine. He’d stand back and watch and wait when he had to, chase and cheat when he could, and if after all of it Gin never came to feel the same way, well, Ichigo would just stay.  He’d be a friend.  Assist in the studio. Find Gin someone else that he could love and hold and grow old with because he’d been alone too long, and he deserved something more, and because loving someone was just that simple.

But, if Gin ever did something self-destructive like this again, he’d lock him in a room and throw away the key, because loving someone was simple, but losing them was hard, and he couldn’t do that again.  

***

Gin shrugged into the clothes Urahara had brought him, grateful for the soft workout pants and the extra pair of socks, but his lip twisted at the yellow hoodie on the top of the pile. It wasn’t his first choice of style, but he was freezing, and the extra layer made sense.  After all the trouble he’d put the man to over the past few days, the last thing he was going to do was complain about the color of his generosity.

It was a pity that the silk kimono had been another casualty of his breakdown. He’d daydreamed about the look on Ichigo’s face when he saw it for the first time, fantasized about the temptation that the layers would present to him, but now he could only imagine what kind of memory it would drag along with it. Maybe he would get the chance to try again someday.

Ran had left soon after Gin’s awakening, clearing out so that Urahara could run his diagnostics and he’d only left after he’d satisfied himself that there was no more leaking from Gin’s spirit body. He explained that he’d had to remove the reiatsu limiter from the gigai during his healing because it was interfering with his reishi levels returning to normal and it would feel strange after all the time he’d spent in the other, muffled state.  

He was right, but it was a good strange. It was almost like having eyes again after having been blind. Urahara and Tsukabishi kept their reiatsu tamped down tightly, but he could feel the sunburst of power that was Ichigo, at first tucked away in the basement where he’d apparently been for the past two days, but now clearly moving in his direction.

Gin pressed his shaking hands against the soft cotton covering his legs.  Hiding wasn’t an option; he wasn’t going to be a coward and run away again. He just didn’t want to see the hurt that he knew he’d caused.

There was a soft knock at the door sooner than he’d expected.  Ichigo must want to get their meeting over with as well.

“Come in, Kurosaki-kun,” he answered, his voice thankfully steady.

The door slid open and the sheer power that flooded the room was overwhelming.  Ichigo had always had that power, but seeing him like this, without the veil over him, was breath-taking.

The redhead, though, looked almost as stunned by what he saw, awkwardly standing frozen in the doorway.

“I’m sorry.”  Gin got right to the groveling. “Kurosaki-kun… Ichigo-kun…  I am so sorry.”

He watched Ichigo’s face closely, watched the amber eyes widen and the lips part on a breathy intake.

“I’m just glad you’re alright.” His voice was hoarse, and his eyes took Gin in from his bedhead to his long, narrow rabbit-feet.  It didn’t look like he was angry, but he didn’t know everything yet.  Angry was still a definite possibility.

“I’m afraid there isn’t anywhere to sit except the bed,” he waved behind him, wishing he’d taken the time to straighten out the messy bedding, but it was too late for that now. “I’d like to explain.  Or to try. If you wouldn’t mind.” He felt the muscles of his face try to smile, but there was nothing happy about it.

Ichigo was still just standing there, staring.  

“Do I have something on my face?” Gin asked. The words fell a little flat, but he didn’t know what else to say.  Ichigo shook his head and brought himself back to something a little more normal.

“No, it’s just that that hoodie is…”

Gin snorted a little laugh. “I know. Not the most attractive thing, but Urahara was gracious enough to loan it to me since my own clothes…  well, at least these were warm and dry.”

“No, that’s not what I meant.” Ichigo shook his head again, but this time with more intent. “I was just going to say that it was mine.  I must’ve left it here the last time I stayed.” He swallowed and Gin watched his throat work, a faint hint of red dusting his cheekbones. “It looks good on you.”

Ichigo’s sweatshirt. He was wearing Ichigo’s sweatshirt.  That was why Urahara was grinning behind his fan as he left the clothes. The man was a menace.

“I didn’t know,” he said, halfway through an apologetic little bow before Ichigo could step forward, a hand outstretched.

“No, it’s fine.  I don’t mind.  I like it on you.  It…” a battle of thoughts was happening behind those eyes and Gin forced himself stand perfectly still so he didn’t startle the younger man into pulling his hand back, finally breathing again when whatever process Ichigo was working through was finished. He met Gin’s gaze, unblinking. “It makes you look like you’re mine.”

Like you’re mine. The world tilted and suddenly Ichigo’s arms were around him, guiding him back to the bed and settling him on the edge before he could end up in a pile on the floor.

“Take it easy,” he said, chafing Gin’s freezing hands between his warm ones. “I’m so sorry.  I shouldn’t have said that. Shit.  And after pushing you so hard…”

Ichigo’s voice was rough with suppressed emotion, but his hands were incredibly gentle, and Gin couldn’t believe that this was happening.

“Did you talk to Ran?” It was a cheap way to start, hoping that Ran had already shared his shame, so he didn’t have to break that ground fresh.

“Matsumoto? No. Kisuke said something about her having to go back to Soul Society.  I think Kyōraku wanted an update or something since she’d been here so long without an assignment.”

“Oh, okay.” Gin had known she had to go back, just as he now knew it was up to him to explain.  “I just didn’t want to waste your time on things you already knew.”

Ichigo rubbed the back of his neck with a rueful sound. “Yeah.  It’s probably safe to assume I don’t know anything.  What happened?  I thought…” he stared at Gin and there was a flash of heartbreak in his eyes that Gin would have given years of his life to erase.

“Please,” Gin gripped Ichigo’s hand in his lap, refusing to let it go, leaning forward to almost touch their temples together, “just let me explain. I screwed up—monumentally, according to Ran—not you.  You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Ichigo turned his hand palm up, leaving it in Gin’s grip. “Okay. If you say so, I’ll believe you, but something happened, and I’d really like to understand so it doesn’t happen again.”

Gin sucked in a deep breath and tried to slow his heart.  He didn’t deserve this much understanding, but Gods he was greedy enough to want it.

“You know me. I’ve never let people close.  Ran-chan is the only person I’ve ever cared about.  I’m not…  temperate in my love.  You saw what I did in the name of protecting her.  Saw what I became.”

Ichigo nodded but didn’t interrupt, a sad look on his face.

“I don’t know if you realize what it was like for me, following Aizen for so long.  I didn’t have friends.  I didn’t have relationships.  Sex wasn’t common and when it did happen it didn’t mean anything. I didn’t see anyone more than once or twice, and I was okay with that.  I didn’t have the room or the resources or the time to actually care about someone.”

He paused and tried to straighten out the tangle of his thoughts.  “It wasn’t until the fight with Aizen was over and my wounds had healed that I even began to feel like I had a soul again, and then I was sent to the human world where everyone’s emotions are so close to the surface all the time that you can practically see them.  It was like having all my skin rubbed raw, I was feeling again, and I’ll be the first to admit I didn’t know how. I certainly didn’t know what to do with you.”

Ichigo made a noise. “What do you mean you didn’t know what to do with me? You never seemed to have a problem with me.”

“I didn’t have a problem with you, you just weren’t what I expected. Do you know how strange it was to deal with someone like you after a hundred years of Aizen?  I watched everything you did for hidden meanings and agendas but every single time you were just exactly what you promised. No lies. No manipulation. No long game.”

The redhead snorted. “Yeah. Kisuke told me once I had all the cunning of a golden retriever, and that he was lucky that I was almost as trainable.”

It was true enough to be funny and they shared a laugh.

“After a while I stopped searching for subtext and just started accepting you at face value.  You were the only person I’d trusted in a hundred years, kind and smart and for some reason you valued me.  I never had a chance.  I fell.  Hard.”

Ichigo made a sound deep in his throat, something that sounded wounded and hopeful and confused, and Gin couldn’t look at him or he’d never get the next part of the story out.

“At first I didn’t believe that you could feel the same way.  No one would or could. Self-loathing isn’t a pretty thing, and I stewed in it. I told myself I was happy with what I had—not many people could count themselves on the short list of people you’d go to war for, and I was so grateful that you’d put me on that list but it wasn’t enough. I wanted more.”

Ichigo raised his free hand to rest on the back of Gin’s neck, the warm weight of it grounding and comforting, and the blond sighed.

“Then things started to change. You started touching me more, smiling at me more, and I couldn’t believe my good fortune. You seemed interested in something more than just being friends, but I still didn’t trust that something like that could ever happen for me.  I started to doubt almost as much as I hoped, and then you asked me to meet you at the festival and I told myself that if you did feel like I did, then every moment I put off telling you was a moment lost, so I—how did your Shakespeare put it?—screwed my courage to the sticking point and told myself that it was time to put myself out there and let you decide what you wanted, and I would take whatever you were willing to give me.”

“At the Festival?” Ichigo asked, and Gin nodded.

“It seemed like you had the same idea, so I dressed in my finest, wanting to offer you the best version of myself, and I left the studio early hoping to find you so I could spend every moment I could with you.  And then, when I finally found you, you had your arms wrapped around another. Laughing.  Allowing her to kiss you.”

Ichigo sat bolt upright and hissed out, “You saw me with Matsumoto.”

Gin nodded, curling in a little on himself with the pain of the memory. “It made a twisted kind of sense. Your family teased you about her, and she visited you often when she didn’t even come to see me. If you cared for her and she’d asked for you to help me, to take me under your wing, it is exactly the kind of thing you’d agree to. You’d go to any lengths for someone you loved, even rehabilitate a villain. And you looked so happy.” He couldn’t keep the wistful tone out of his voice. “It’s ironic that even while I felt like my world was falling apart, I couldn’t begrudge you your happiness. I just couldn’t stay and watch it.  So, I left.  I didn’t make a conscious decision, I just turned in the opposite direction and started walking. I didn’t stop until my gigai stopped me.”

And that was it.  He’d laid it all out, and now it was up to Ichigo.

God, he was tired.

“I didn’t ever intend this.” He waved haphazardly at the room and the mess that his collapse had caused. “And I cannot begin t’ apologize enough for any hurt I caused you.”

Ichigo pulled him forward, hand tight on the back of his neck, and Gin could feel a tremble as it passed through his body. They sat like that in silence, heads together for a long time before Ichigo spoke.

“So, you don’t hate me?” The words were a whisper between them, insecure but hopeful.  Gin whispered back. “I could never. I love you; I’ve loved you forever.”

Ichigo pulled back a little, his eyes huge and dark, searching Gin’s face for something he apparently found because he nodded once and leaned a fraction closer.  “Good. I love you, too. I’m going to kiss you now.”

***

Gin’s lips were thin and dry, frozen still under his, shocked into immobility but not pulling away.  Ichigo pulled back and their breath mingled hot between them, panting as if they’d shunpo’d the breadth of Seireitei.

“Wanted this for so long,” he murmured, leaning in to nip along the edge of Gin’s lower lip, “was so afraid I’d lost you.”

Something in that sparked movement and long fingers suddenly cupped his chin, tilting his head so that Gin could lean back in and slot their mouths together.  It was sweetness and heat, lighting up all of Ichigo’s nerves, everything more intense than a simple brush of lips should be.

Gin was the one that pulled back then, fingers sliding up to hold Ichigo’s head where he wanted it, pressing their foreheads together again as they caught their breath.

“God, you’re gorgeous. Can’t believe you’re mine.” Gin’s accent is thicker, his pupils huge, the aquamarine nothing but a gossamer rim, and Ichigo has never seen anything so beautiful. “You’re stuck with me now. Never going t’ let you go.”

The possessiveness of the words sent a shiver through him and Ichigo slid his hands over Gin’s narrow hips, ghosting them along his long, lean flanks. He was thin, but it was all whipcord strength and sinew. Ichigo couldn’t wait until he had time to explore the sharp planes of his body, to dig his thumbs into the bony ridge of Gin’s hipbones, to kiss the dip between the wings of his shoulder blades. Those things would come soon enough, though.  For now, with his arms around this man, he had everything he could ask for.

He leaned into his future, breathing hot against Gin’s cheek, recognizing his words for the promise that they were. He would always be there, Ichigo belonging to him as much as Gin belonged to Ichigo. He’d follow Ichigo into the depths of Hell if he had to to pull him back home, because that was what this was.  What they were together.

He settled his arms around Gin’s waist, his embrace tight and insistent. “Why would I ever want to leave?” He pressed their lips together again, heart stuttering at how perfect it felt, before pulling back and smiling the way that only Gin could make him smile. “You’re my home.”

[diabolik-trash-heap]

Ranmaru + 18

For smut prompt “I’m still mad at you” with Ranmaru x reader.A very, veeeery late birthday present for @ranmarukurosakis. I’m so sorry it took so long, but I hope you enjoy it.

“30 minutes until we are live, Kurosaki-san.”

You were jolted from your thoughts by the loud rapping on the door, followed by a man’s muffled warning of Quartet Night’s impending interview. You glance over to Ran, hardly fazed, still fussing with himself in the green room mirror. 

“I really hate these damn things…” he groans, straining his fingers through his hair one last time to get it to that perfect level of rocker chic. “Hopefully they will talk to the other guys more than me. Maybe a drink or two would help. What do you say?”

Ran turns his attention to you, the bottle of whiskey in hand. The tiny smirk melts away when he sees the frown still plastered on your face from earlier. 

“H-hey…are you okay?” The usual gruffness of his voice had dissipated entirely. 

“I’m still mad at you.” You shift your weight back, bringing your knees close to you. Staring at a crumpled wrapper on the ground seemed to be the more viable option than looking at his face knowing you would soften immediately. 

“Look…I’m sorry about earlier.”

“I know you are. But it still hurt.“ 

“I know I say some dumb shit sometimes.”

“Oh?" 

Ran squeezes the back of his neck, hesitant with his next words. 

"Oi…okay a lot.” he confesses, punctuating with a sigh. Arms folded, he digs a heel into floor, waiting upon your next response. 

Truth of matter you didn’t want to dwell on it any longer, but your stubbornness was putting you at a standstill and not wanting to forgive him just yet.  Unfortunately, Ran caught the small snort in response to his admission, and you try to cover it up immediately with a cough and more pouting. A poor attempt.

“Guess I gotta earn your forgiveness."  A conniving grin spreads across his face as he unfolds arms and glides over to you. He leans into you with one knee to your side, pinching your chin between his fingers and jerking your head up towards his. 

"You know if you keep making that face there’s no way I’m going to just leave you alone.” He lowers his face to yours, eyes dark and intense. A hand wraps around your neck, shoving your body against the back of the couch. Before you could even come back for air, your lips meet in a searing kiss, his tongue slipping between yours to take over, tasting quite sweet. Any lingering negative thoughts you had dissolved into an exchange of wanton moans, your eyes closing to absorb yourself in his touch and scent. 

His wandering fingers find their way underneath your shirt and bra, cupping your breast and rolling your nipple between his thumb and finger. Your body clenches at the sudden intrusion, the whimpers muted with kisses so deep and greedy it felt like he wanted to consume all of you. You come back to your senses for a split second, grabbing his shirt and pushing him off of you.

“Ran.” You had to take another gulp of air before you could finish, eyes darting to the clock hanging on the far wall. “You have less than 25 minutes.”

“Tch! You think I don’t know how to get you off by now?" 

You roll your eyes. "I would rather not risk.. .GAH!”

Ran interrupts you when he yanks you down by the ankles, landing you on your back with a thud. He tugs repeatedly at your belt, undoing it with a clank and tossing your pants and underwear onto the floor before you can argue. He dives between your legs, inhaling your scent with a faint growl, his ashy hair tickling the inside of your thighs as he nips at them.

“Heh." 

Bemused, Ran runs his thumb along your folds, gathering the wetness already forming and licking it off with a smirk. 

"Looks like I already had you going.”

He wasn’t wrong. The sudden rush of his mouth and hands all over you made your body hot and craving it elsewhere.“That’s not the point Ran, I don’t want you being….ahhhh, fuck.”Your hips jolt when he plays with your clit, flicking it with his tongue and sucking hard on the sensitive nub, relishing the sight of your squirming hips underneath his ministrations. 

“Fuck you taste amazing. Open up more for me.”

His hands wrap around your thighs, demanding you keep them spread wide, latching his mouth over your entrance. He knew how to put his tongue to good use, wriggling it about inside, darting in and out of your cunt, watching your every reaction like a ravenous wolf. Ran never was the type afraid to get a bit messy, evident by the slickness covering his lips and chin. Two fingers ease inside of you, curling up and pressing into your g-spot as he vigorously thrusts into you. His lips wrap around your clit again, sucking in perfect marriage with the thick digits buried in your gut. Every stroke of his fingers made your legs shaky and weak, yet you wanted nothing more than squeeze your thighs like a vice around him. You glance back over to the clock. Really was a shame it couldn’t last. 

“15 minutes Ran,” you warn between shallow pants, the fabric of the couch noticeably wet underneath you.  You loved the way his fingers filled you, but your body was aching for his cock to be buried inside of you.

“Guess it’s time for the main show huh?  A shame ‘cause I could eat you out all damn day.” 

You hear the grind of the zipper, shifting his hips enough to free his straining cock, his fingers still knuckle-deep in you. He plants a single kiss on your swollen clit before moving on, dragging himself up between your legs and joining you in another kiss, the entire weight of his body pinning you down. You swipe your tongue across his lips, cleaning your own juices off for him. 

“Dirty girl.” he groans into your mouth, grinding his cock against your clit. 

He slides his cock between your folds several times, lining it up at your entrance. He moves his hips forward, pushing inside, the flared head of his cock stretching you out by every inch. The heat rises to your cheeks as he fills you to the hilt, clenching around him when the initial shudder passes through you.

“Always so tight for me.” Ran pulls back, thrusting inside again with strained words. “Even after everything we did to you last night.”

You scoff. “You know I don’t break that easily.”

“You sure about that? I seem to remember you saying how you ‘couldn’t take anymore’ a few times…”

Your face starts to burn from ear to ear, frustrated there was no hiding your embarrassment from him. It only served to make him beam harder. 

“…shut up and fuck me already.”

“Heh, I love a woman who knows what she wants." 

Ran raises one of your legs back, obeying your demands without a fuss and slams harder into you. You grab at his shirt for leverage, arching your back with every crash of his hips against yours, swearing every time he somehow buried further inside. It was getting harder to contain the noises coming from you, biting the back of your hand to keep your voice down. It felt like he was trying to make you falter. 

“You still mad at me?”

“Maybe a little bit.” you tease, reaching for his tie. Twisting it in your hand, you jerk him towards you, lips locking in a rough kiss. 

Playfully, you thread your fingers through his hair, his hips slowing as the new sensation of you scratching and kneading takes over. But the sadistic part of you lashes out when you hit the base, grabbing a fistful and jerking his head back to expose his neck. Ran spits out a loud moan at the sudden pain surging down his back and you trace your tongue along his Adam’s apple, sensing every muscle tense in his lean figure. 

"You like that, huh?” you purr, a smirk creeping across your face as your teeth graze across his neck. 

Ran snatches you by the wrists, pinning both of them with a single hand with ease. 

“You keep doing that shit and I’m definitely going to miss my interview.” Ran growls, fire burning in his eyes. He angles your hips even higher, driving himself even deeper into you with a manic thrust. If it weren’t for a swift hand slapping over your mouth, the yelp that flew out of you that instant would have indubitably exposed the two of you. 

“Hey Ran Ran…you alright buddy? We’re going to be on in about ten minutes.” Reiji knocks a couple times, waiting upon confirmation. 

“Ran Ran? Oh…”

Ran didn’t miss a single beat, ignoring his band mate who stood mere feet away as his cock tore you in two. He was too close to stop now, and he knew you were too. He buries his face into your neck, biting down and kissing the red spots beginning to bloom. It was a welcomed pain. His grip loosens on your wrists and migrates to your hands, his long fingers entangling with yours. 

“You know he’s still out there right?” Ran reminds you between strained groans, his breath hot against your neck. “You should let him know we’re just about finished." 

He was right. And the image of Reiji standing outside, listening in on every moan, every cry, every slap of flesh against each was enough to shove you over the edge, your mind hazing over when your body finds its release. Your legs begin to shake uncontrollably, Ran holding your hands tighter with every wave he felt pass through you. 

"Let it all out. I wanna cum with you." 

Head thrown back, your hoarse cries become unfiltered, no doubt being heard by the party that stood outside. His own body starts to tremble, his breaths shallow and hips erratic in their movement, dancing right at the edge himself. He ruts himself inside you one final time with a deep growl, his cock twitching as he pumps load after load of cum into you. Sliding his arm around your neck, he embraces you tight, peppering your face with kisses between pants. 

"I love you. Don’t you forget that.”

His face and chest were flushed a light pink, accented by a sheen of sweat that already had formed across his face, looking so vulnerable yet tranquil even as his heart still pounded away. 

“I love you too.”

He presses his forehead against yours, savoring the moment. It was pretty safe to say you weren’t upset with him anymore. 

“SHIT.”

It dawns on Ran what time it was, and he leaps up from the couch to fix his himself up. He checks the mirror, surveying the damage, especially to his hair, running his hand through a couple times to try and fix it, with no avail. It just would have to do at this point. Despite his usual calculated appearance, he would have to chalk this one up to bedhead. 

Even in his rush, he found a few seconds to spare, rushing over to you for a chaste kiss as you struggle to fix your own clothes. 

“Make sure you keep it all in there for later when I can properly fuck you.” Ran whispers, sliding his hand between your legs for a moment before running off again. 

He swings open the door, leaping back when he sees Reiji standing there. Reiji peeks over Ran’s shoulder at you, shit-eating grin plastered on his face, and then looks back at Ran. 

“That’s a good look for you Ran Ran. Does onii-san gets a ride after the interview too?" 

"Oi! REIJI!”

“Mengo mengo~!”

Ran barges through Reiji, nearly knocking him over. Reiji starts the shut the door and whine something about him being mean, but stops immediately when your eyes meet. 

“Guess we’ll be seeing you later.” Reiji winks, closing the door behind him and running after the grumbling rocker. 

[orengjijyuusu]

Articles of Clothing (A Jinguji Ren fanfic)

Okay so I wrote this prior to the release of Ren's new solo album, "Rose Rose Romance." It's basically about how Ren got his inspiration for the cover art of his *cough* strip tease *cough* album. The boys will all be in it so enjoy!

"We need to think of the concept art for your upcoming album, Jinguji." The visiting photographer ponders while pacing the room. 

The strawberry blonde idol looks attentively at the possible designs and themes of his latest single, "Rose Rose Romance." He retorts at the photographers various pitches, going back and forth with how the wardrobe would be drawn up.

Across the table, Nanami is busy composing her next arrangement for Syo's upcoming album. She scribbles notes on sheet music feverishly, not really paying attention to the two discussing their business. Despite being insistent on NOT needing to be present at a meeting involving photoshoots and album artwork, Ren had successfully convinced her to accompany him for, "moral support" reasons.

The composer automatically knew the role of being, "moral support" was poppycock, but how could she say no when he worked so hard on this project. Plus Ren could possibly draw some inspiration from the score now that she thought about it; so maybe she could be of non "moral support" use yet.

"My lady." His velvety voice breaks her concentration, causing her head to snap up in response. Ren's cheek is cupped into his palm while he smiles knowingly at her; it seems he had been calling her name for a bit.

Nanami blinks, "Sorry, I was in the zone. What's up?" She quickly straightens her stack of paperwork in her lap.

"May I see our arrangement?" He asks politely, with heavy emphasis on "our." "It would help a lot with the wardrobe theme I'm going for."

She nods and sifts through her folder, eventually finding the sheet music and handing it across the table to the idol. He gives her a wink before mouthing, "thank you." Nanami smiles bashfully and watches as Ren scans the piece.

The photographer waits expectantly as Ren begins humming the tune to himself, the gears of his mind turning as he thinks of the overall message of his album.

After a minute, he places the papers on the table and turns to the photographer. "This song is obviously very sensual, in composition and in lyrics. We definitely need roses in this. And we need something that epitomizes that message in terms of dress. We something daring, something passionate, something..." he purposefully glances over at Nanami with a teasing sultry gaze, "Something sexy."

Her face goes red at the comment and buries her growing blush in the paperwork.

Ren laughs at his composer exhibiting such an adorable reaction to his shameless flirts. He's still happy he can get a reaction like that from her despite using it numerous times during their development with Starish.

Meanwhile, the photographer ignores the underlying comment the idol made and took it as inspiration instead. "That's our Jinguji Ren for you! Always knowing what style to go for! This is plenty of ideas, thank you so much!!" They throw their hands in the air, "Oh I have so much to do now! I have to plan. I have to set up the wardrobe department. I have-I have to order all the fabrics!"

Ren chuckles and holds his hands up, "I'm looking forward to seeing what you come up with. Thank you for your hard work." He and Nanami bow at the photographer.

"Yes! Thank you for your hard work!" The photographer scrambles to pick up their files, "I must be going now! I have IDEAS brewing! Come by the studio on Friday. I'll be in touch!!" They rush out of the room with enthusiasm, leaving the two clients alone.

Both Nanami and Ren breathe a sigh of relief once they leave. Who knew photographers had so much energy. Ren turns to Nanami with expectant eyes, "May I treat you to dinner, my lady?" Nanami shoulders her bag and places her folders inside, "Maybe next time, I just got a melody I could use for Syo's new song and I don't want to lose the thought."

Nanami could have swore she saw Ren's shoulders slump at her rejection to the invitation, however he smiles and gives her head a pat.

"That's our composer. Hard at work." He chuckles lightheartedly.

Nanami looks up at him and notices his naturally drooping eyelids. It's not that he was sad, that's just how Ren's eyes normally look. But goddangit it wasnt helping the feeling of guilt growing in her chest. She purses her lips and thinks for a hot moment. Then she looks back up with a smile, "But, I wouldn't be opposed to stopping somewhere and getting ice cream."

The idol's eyes upturn the second she offers. He gives her a teasing smirk, "Making time for me, hmm? You truly have a heart of gold, my lady."

"You offered in the first place." Nanami erupts in a fit of giggles as they leave to go back to the agency.

*Later...*

"I assume your meeting went alright?" Masato asks, not looking up from his calligraphy as Ren walks into the room. His roommate throws his bag onto his desk and stretches his arms out, "We have an idea. Our lady came quite in handy with the composition."

Masato's eyebrow twitches, "I swear, stop dragging Nanami everywhere. You're putting her through a lot of trouble what with all the important work she needs to do. Distractions won't help her in the slightest."

Ren plops himself on his bed and yawns, "You're no fun as usual. Lucky for me, we went out for ice cream to end our PRODUCTIVE day. Which was LOTS of fun by the way." 

The bluenette slaps his brush onto the rice paper in irritation, "Everytime you go somewhere with her, it always turns into date night for you." He growls.

"Jealous?" Ren scoffs, leaning on his elbow to look smugly at Masato.

His roommate rips away the ruined calligraphy and starts on a fresh piece, "Like I would ever want to stoop down to your level. Unlike you, I have impulse control."

Ren rolls his eyes so far back he swore he could see his brain, "Whatever. I'm not going to be irked by your party pooping attitude. Gotta put my best foot forward for the ladies when I do my photo shoot."

He sits up briefly and strips himself down to his briefs. After carelessly tossing his clothes to the floor, he turns on his side and shuts off his lamp, "Goodnight, bowlhead."

Masato makes a "Tch!" sound with his teeth before concentrating again. "At least shower in the morning, idiot." He mumbles.

*The Next Day*

"No no! It's all wrong!!" The photographer groans, walking up to Ren as he poses with some roses.

The idol sighs and places the flowers on the floor, "I agree, something feels off about the setting."

The photographer places his chin in his hand, "No it's not that...its the outfit. I...I dont know why but it doesn't look right. It looked fine before..."

The two wrack their brains trying to figure out another solution for the cover photo, however each idea seemed to stay farther from what they originally wanted for the theme.

"Let's mix it up a bit. Wardrobe, we need to discuss." The photographer snaps their fingers and two staff members come over with a rack of clothes and sketch pads.

Ren exhales exhaustingly and goes to sit in the makeup department to do touch ups. As he lets the staff do their work, he notices Nanami through the mirror followed closely by his superior, Ranmaru.

Without turning around, he raises a hand and stares straight at the two in the reflection, "Hey, what brings you two here?"

Nanami walks to the side of his chair and hands him a bento, "Courtesy of Kotobuki bento. Hijirikawa noticed you didn't really eat anything for breakfast so we brought it over."

Ren takes it with a loving smile, "I appreciate it, lady."

"Tch..." Ranmaru scoffs quietly, "I'm the one who actually got it from that idiot." He saunters off towards the snack table.

"Of course, thank you as well, Ran-chan." Ren chuckles before turning serious.

"I don't mean to have you both see me like this but...turns out my photo shoot isn't going as planned. I'm sorry I couldn't gather enough from your song, lady." He gives her a sad smile.

The composer clutches her folders to her chest, "That's not true, Jinguji-san. You always have an amazing sense of style. That's a fact."

"My lady..." Ren's eyes widen slightly in surprise.

"When I saw you look at the score the other day, you looked so focused." Nanami puts her folders on the makeup table and squeezes his arm resting on the chair, "I could see the ideas churning in your head. So I know you can do it!"

The idol smirks, then brings his lips to the hand on his arm for a quick kiss.

Nanami briefly feels her soul leave her body before recovering.

"Always so encouraging. Where would we be without you, lady?" He hums.

Nanami clears her throat at her sudden outburst and looks away, "A-Anyways, what are you having trouble with, Jinguji-san? Maybe Kurosaki-senpai and I could help." She looks over to Ranmaru stuffing his face with bananas over by the snack table. Or just me, she thinks with a helpless smile.

Ren leans back in his chair, "Well that's what we are trying to find out. It's the clothing that was picked out for me." He turns his head to the photographer looking through his pictures, "Excuse me, is it alright if I take a look at what we have so far?"

The photographer sighs and brings over the camera while still looking at the screen, "Go ahead. Good luck trying to find something." They hand Ren the camera and walk off elsewhere.

He tilts the screen so Nanami can see as he clicks through each photo.

She hums to herself while analyzing Ren's outfit, "I'm no fashion expert but…" she gently tugs the camera away from his grip, "Aren't there too many clothing articles?"

Ren raises an eyebrow, "Oh, how so?"

The composer peers closer, "I mean--you have two jackets here. One around your waist and one you are actually wearing. And there's a loose scarf…"

"Looks more like winter wear than the passionate look you're going for." Ranmaru says over Nanami's shoulder, causing her to jump a little.

He ignores her reaction and bites into a banana, "If you want passion, you could stand to show some skin, ya know." He grunts before walking off again.

Nanami taps her chin with her finger, "That could work…"

Skin… Ren snaps his head up, "That's it!! I got it!" He jumps up out of his chair and walks over to the photographer. He whispers something to them before their face lights up with inspiration.

"BRILLIANT!! Alright we have a lead! Jinguji, head to the dressing room. I need the makeup department on him, stat! This photo shoot can be saved yet!"

Nanami's face lights up at the good news, "What's the idea, Jinguji-san?"

He shrugs off his jackets and turns to her with a wink, "That you'll have to find out for yourself, lady. I'm going to embrace what Ran-chan said earlier about 'showing some skin.' Wish me luck!"

He gives her head a pat and walks to the dressing room. At that point, Ranmaru makes his way back over to Nanami.

"He get an idea?" He asks, taking a sip from his water bottle.

"Yes, apparently Jinguji is heeding your advice, Kurosaki-san." Nanami chirps happily.

Ranmaru nearly chokes on his drink, "*cough* *cough* Say what now?!" He sputters.

The composer gives the idol a confused look, "Is something wrong?"

"I dont know why, but I got a feeling he's going to do something extremely stupid." He shudders while wiping his mouth.

Nanami chuckles nervously, "I-Is that so…?"

*A week later*

Ren let's out a yawn as he makes his way over to the lounging area. The photo shoot continued without a hitch, and by now the CDs should already be out on the shelves. He honestly couldn't wait to see the others reactions to his album.

The first thing he notices is the usual gaggle of guys gathered tightly around the coffee table, talking feverishly amongst themselves. As Ren approaches, the shortest member of Starish hears him first and jumps up in a fury.

"Ren!! What the hell is THIS!?" Syo shouts in disbelief, poking a finger aggressively at the album.

Bingo, Ren says with a devilish smile, Just the reaction I was hoping for. He smiles innocently, "Whatever could you mean, Shorty?"

"Cut the crap!! You know what I'm talking about! This!!" Syo shoves the CD album in his face, his face as red as a tomato.

There he was, printed for all the lovely ladies to see, completely shirtless...and pantless.

"Well, as you can plainly see, THAT is a CD cover." Ren retorts with a playful smirk.

"Why you-!" Before Syo can blow a fuse, Otoya steps in.

"Now now, let's not get too overworked." He laughs nervously before doing a complete 180 on Ren. "Ren, you are clearly NAKED! What--Just wha--I can't…" He clutches the album in disbelief, unable to form proper sentences.

"Hey now, they made sure to cut out the more 'daring' parts. Even I have standards." Ren winks lightheartedly at the group.

"The whole CONCEPT is daring!" Tokiya blurts before covering the blush on his face.

"That's our Ren! Always going the extra mile. So cool!!" Natsuki exclaims with a beaming face.

Cecil looks down in disappointment, "Aww, we could have done stuff like that? No fair!"

"No! One Ren is enough for this group!!" Syo shouts in response.

The strawberry blonde can't stop grinning from ear to ear. He was SO enjoying this. Suddenly, a copy of the album hits him in the face. He topples backward and onto the floor, wincing at the stinging sensation erupting on his forehead. Ren looks up to see Masato on his feet, looking the most pissed of them all.

"THANK YOU, Hijirikawa!" Syo raises his hands up.

"M-Masa, that was a bit unnecessary…" Otoya says nervously.

Masato's face is still stoic, however he failed to hide the red tint on his ears. "You...I can't believe you!" He has the most trouble forming words.

"I know, it's SO shocking. Honestly Hijirikawa, I thought you knew me better." His roommate says sarcastically.

"Yeah but I didn't think you'd actually be crazy enough to DO it. You think I'M shocked, look at poor Nanami!" He gestures to the sofa behind the idols. Nanami lay curled up with her face buried in a pillow. One could almost imagine steam rising off the top of her head. "She's been like that for 15 minutes!"

Ren bashfully scratches the back of his head, "She DID say I had too many articles of clothing on my body." 

Otoya and Syo sit down beside her and copy her position with their own pillows, "It's okay Nanami, we are just as shocked!!" Otoya whimpers while holding Syo in his arms.

"Guys, I think we are overreacting. Don't worry, Ren! I support you!" Natsuki places a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

Tokiya does the same, "I do too. I'm sorry. I was overcome with shock earlier."

Their fellow colleague sighs, "I'm glad to hear it. But I have a feeling you all won't be able to let this go so easily."

"Definitely not." Tokiya chides.

"It's blackmail material now." Syo mutters, looking up from the pillow.

"We won't ever let you live this down." Cecil smiles at Ren.

"We'll tease you about this until the day you die." Ittoki laughs evilly.

"Because we love you, though." Natsuki adds on.

Masato discreetly shakes his head and makes a face.

Ren laughs and walks over to Nanami, "You saved me again, lady. Don't ever forget it." He ruffles her hair.

Nanami curls up tighter, "I don't think I can, Jinguji-san." She mutters in the pillow.

*elsewhere*

"Whoo! That's our sexy kouhai! Show off that skin!" Reiji whoops as he watches a coverage of Ren's album on TV.

"The bastard went and did it!" Ranmaru cringes and buries his face in his hands,"I should have kept my damn mouth shut!"

Camus' stares distastefully at the screen while a pile of sugar forms in his tea cup and onto the table. He throws a glare Ranmaru's way, "Figures you would be the one to give him such immature ideas. Have you no shame?"

"Okay first off, fuck you! No one was talking to you, damn butler!" Ranmaru growls, not even turning to directly return fire at his colleague.

"I imagine the other members of Starish are quite shocked as well." Ai adds quietly, "Though I can imagine the ratings will rise 112% because of him."

"Ne ne! We should do a nude photo shoot with all four of us! It'll be super fun and sexy!" Reiji winks at them with excitement.

"No. Do it yourself." All three respond immediately.

"You're so mean!!!"

[chaosgreymistchild]

Unto the Soul, Unto the Flesh

My entry for the UraIchi Prompt Competition 2, I guess...

Ichigo slides his fingers across the skin of his chest, feeling the ridges and bumps where Aizen had nearly cleaved him in half, the circular scar where he had been speared through the chest (hisSoulSleephiscorethecentreofhissoulPROTECTPROTECTPROTECT) then the larger circle of lighter skin overlapping it. Softer skin. Newer skin. Skin that had been regenerated (alongwiththemajorityofhischesthishearthislungshehasahollowholeahollowholeohgodohgodPROTECTPROTECTPROTECT).

He moves onto other parts of his body. He runs his fingers over his hands and arms, the slight discolorations the only sign of the marks Senbonzakura had left on his body (heneedstorescuehersaveherherbrotherdoesnotdeserveherhewillbeherbigbrotherthenPROTECTPROTECTPROTECT). He runs his fingers over his face, his eyes, the countless thin, nearly invisible scars where people had aimed for his Hollow mask, his eyes, his brain (he’shalfmadandattackinganythingthatmoves[cutoffmyarmandlegisthisanywaytowin]heistheirownlyshieldPROTECTPROTECTPROTECT). He traces intricate swirls and tribal tattoos over his hips and spine, weaving his way around that near-constant ache of chipped spinal cord.

Ichigo takes his hands away.

His body is his canvas and his art, painted in muscle and carved by blood, but all there are there, are marks made by others.

Kisuke keeps his hat tipped dangerously low over his head nowadays to hide the scars on his face. It doesn’t help, it never helps, not when his hat wobbles dangerously whenever he so much as turns his head, and he must look up every time a customer comes in to greet them, exposing those thin, curséd lines, running like tears down his cheeks. Sometimes he wishes that he could have hidden away from the world, from Aizen. Wishes he had never tried to fix his mistakes and just run, far, far away from anything and everything (theHogyokuseeshearswatchesneverwishneverwantkeepsilentdonotspeak).

Kisuke leaves the shop counter early on the bad days, resolutely ignoring the way Tessai stares at him disapprovingly even as he says that he’s got something cooking in his lab, could he just mind the counter for him while he takes notes, thank you very much Tessai, such a gem, in a cheerful (alwayscheerfulnotallowedtobesadhavesorrowactivatetheHogyokuneverwishneverwantkeepsilentdonotspeak) voice.

He stares and stares at the walls in his lab blankly until night falls, and then the moon dies, and then sun rises on the new day again, not knowing what it is to want for anything anymore.

Ichigo refuses to go to the shouten anymore. Urahara is rarely there and on the single occasion he was, he had been so shattered and broken and hiding behind his mask, that Ichigo hadn’t the heart to keep going.

Kisuke wishes, sometimes, that Ichigo would come back, but he squashes that feeling immediately, buries it with a century of experience and instinct, and turns away.

Yoruichi kidnaps the two, throws them into a room, and guards the exits with watchful eyes.

The student may have surpassed the teacher, and her friend may know how to free himself regardless, but her boys know her well, and know not to attempt to escape.

She would not allow them to destroy themselves over an absence of faith.

Ichigo stumbles a little while speaking. “Did- did, you, Yoruichi—”

Kisuke refrains from nodding. “She did,” he says instead.

An awkward silence settles between them, a rift that had been created when they couldn’t see each other without pain.

A stubborn expression spreads across Ichigo’s face. Kisuke recognises it as the same grimly determined expression he had worn when battling Aizen and fighting against insurmountable odds.

With a deliberate slowness that Ichigo rarely exhibits, he reaches out to cradle Kisuke’s scarred cheeks, an action the other allows with a flinch. “Kisuke,” he says to the older man, scarred and broken and wrapped in splintered, jagged edges designed to draw blood, yet yearning all the same, “Urahara Kisuke, you made me who I am today, trained me, marked me with a Hollow’s power, and carved with blood into my flesh. You are my maker, do not think of hiding away from me now.”

Ichigo watches as Kisuke trembles beneath his hands, shaking for reasons he cannot fathom.

Kisuke wants to rip his student’s hand from his face, wants to hide away from them, wants to unleash his confusion and fear and crushing guilt as a wave of crimson energy ready and willing to rip and tear through his student’s body and sliCE THE OTHER INTO THE TINIEST PIECES—

A pulse of killing intent, near drowning the wave of fear that rode under that current, flashes through his reiatsu before he can hold it in.

Ichigo flinches back, gripping onto Kisuke all the harder so that his hands never leave the scientist’s scars.

Kisuke gasps and jerks, as if to free himself, but then he is clinging onto Ichigo’s wrists just as hard as he rides out the waves of supressed wants and needs.

Then Ichigo is kissing him, hard and fierce, as wild and untamed as his reiatsu. Kisuke knows that he really shouldn’t be being poetic, but that’s his first instinct when his mind feels like it’s being poured out of his head like sand from a broken hourglass, and he’s shifting through the remnant grains for brief, bright flashes of thought. He kisses back, tentative and yearning, caught in the younger man’s gravity.

A tongue licks into his mouth, and oh Soul King, that was everything he’d longed for and more. He could taste the tea Tessai liked serving, and hands grabbed his wrists, and since when had he let go and closed his eyes?

“You okay with this?” Ichigo mumbles breathlessly against his lips.

He responds with a nibbling at Ichigo’s bottom lip that makes a whimper pass those brilliant lips.

“Gods, Kisuke,” a strangled gasp.

Wood thuds under his shoulders — the table. A brief flash of cold air, before Ichigo’s bare body covers him again. He can feel every inch of skin, every raised scar. He kisses those scars, fervently, like a worship. “Want you,” he mouths against the remnants of Ichigo’s near-bisection, “Love you,” he murmurs against the marks the Hollow hole had left behind.

A hitching breath, a hiccup in the body above him. “Love you,” Ichigo murmurs back, kisses pressed into his hair, “Love you, so, so much,” and Ichigo’s bringing his face up, and kissing his scars. “Beautiful, gorgeous, brilliant,” Ichigo murmurs, kissing worship into his skin.

A thigh brushes against him.

Kisuke swears that the sun might have exploded. He lets out a strangled groan and struggles to remember how to breathe.

Ichigo smiles down at him, unusually smug and radiant.

Then he lets go of the tight control he has over his reiatsu.

Ichigo’s pupils blow wide and his hips jerk up. Kisuke groans at the friction.

A torrent of reiatsu floods the room, Ichigo’s lust hitting him like a freight train and then all he sees are stars and light.

In short order, these things happen:

Ichigo draws on his skin. At first, they are names of loves, both platonic and romantic, then swirls and stripes like those of his Hollow form, and then tribal patterns that wind their way up his arms and down his back and sliding up his neck and creeping up onto his face (“Heyo, King,” a voice whispers in the night). It isn’t long until he learns to draw the lines of his intimately, achingly familiar Hollow-mask on his face, freehand and without a mirror.

Kisuke begins to show his face to strangers and friends alike, baring to the world his trust in his student (not his guilt, never his guilt, not again), the relief of his burden.

Kisuke keeps two rooms empty and made-up for whenever the three Kurosaki siblings need to get away from their father. It doesn’t take long for Ichigo to move into Kisuke’s room. It takes barely a day later before the youngest generation of the Kurosaki family to move into the Urahara Shouten altogether.

Kurosaki Isshin bursts into the candy store screaming and wailing about his son’s virtue and how his family has abandoned him. Underneath all the dramatics and tears enough to drown a small puppy in (“Urahara-san! Ichi-nii said that drowning puppies is mean!”) there is a very real pain and sense of betrayal. Kisuke doesn’t allow that to sway him. Isshin had had his chance, and all he’d ever done was drive away his children.

A very smug black cat was frequently sighted around the neighbourhood.

That smugness soon turned to yowling anger as the Urahara Shouten closed its doors to meddlers.

(Yuzu soon rescued the “poor thing”, so Ichigo and Kisuke were saved Yoruichi’s revenge. Well, up to a point, anyways)

Kurosaki Ichigo and Kurosaki Kisuke lived long fulfilling lives, until Ichigo died for the last time, and the whole family began the slow move into Soul Society.

Even to this day, some say that in the town of Karakura if you pray to the right spirits on the right day for the right reasons— there might be a green-and-white fan waiting for you on your doorstep.

(Ichigo never could let go of Karakura, and his drive had always been to protect his people)

[soft-manga]

kurosaki-san's single minded love

[shoujo-dump]

Kurosaki-san no Ichizuna Ai ga Tomaranai

[jisatsual]

[akaluan]

Baku!Erich Part 4

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | ????

((Last of what I currently have written. Might get some more done this weekend.

Also, it’s really fun to write Alexis like this, she’s such a sassy creature I love her to death.))

They begin that night.

Erich devours the boy’s first nightmare and Alexis pulls free a fragment of the hoshi no tama, no bigger than a grain of rice. She holds it out to him, perched on a claw, and Erich breaks off a fragment of his Self to wrap around the divine gift.

A baku’s protective nature, to guard the boy from unintentional harm.

He breathes out the power gained from the boy’s first nightmare, tucking it close around the gift and letting none escape. The end result looks almost like another hoshi no tama, gleaming in the moonlight with a single, bright star in its heart.

It’s beautiful, and Erich can’t help but feel /hope/.

He plucks the new orb from Alexis’ paw and presses it gently to the boy’s forehead. It sinks in like rain on parched earth, gone before Erich even has a chance to let go.

The boy’s face scrunches up in reaction and he grumbles in his sleep, head turning away and arms pulling his blankets closer. They wait, watching him for any sign of distress, but only another nightmare comes.

::How long, do you think?:: Alexis asks while plucking the newborn nightmare free.

Erich considers the hoshi no tama, then presses it gently to the hollow of Alexis’ throat. ::Two months, perhaps?::

Two months is a long time. Already they’ve spent nearly a month guarding the teens’ sleep. Already they’ve spent more time in one place, /together/, than at any other moment in their lives.

Already they are growing attached to these humans, like they once did with the soldiers who called them into being.

::Two months to heal his soul, but how many months to sooth their dreams?:: she wonders, staring down at the sleeping boy.

That is a question he has no answer for, and they both know it. Whatever these teens have been through, they were thrown into it without preparation or regard for their wellbeing. The price they now pay is cruel and relentless, and Erich is uncertain how long it will take for them to recover.

::We should get moving,:: he offers instead. He pulls the next nightmare from the boy’s mind before it can settle, then leans in and breathes out his fragment of protection. ::Remember to keep track of the hours.::

Alexis nods and leaps through the window, orienting towards another of the teens.

But she doesn’t leave.

/They/ don’t leave.

Because the man that’s been stalking them is standing in midair, eyes shadowed by his hat and cane held in a deceptively loose grip. His expression is flat and cold and unyielding, like some of the most war-hardened soldiers Erich ever knew.

Silence stretches as they each wait for the other side to cave first. It seems to last forever, straining Erich’s patience and making Alexis go still in preparation to strike.

(They have charges to care for. Charges that they are ignoring in favor of a useless standoff with a dangerous man.)

(But they are two and he is one, and Erich and Alexis have never been shy about carving their way through problems.)

He and Alexis share a look. The man’s stance shifts.

::I told you he could see us,:: Erich says, breaking the standoff with an irreverent comment. It throws the man, albeit briefly, and snaps the rising tension nicely.

Alexis harrumphs at him, put upon and annoyed, and gives the man a ‘can you believe my companion?’ look that further throws him off balance. ::You /guessed/ he could see us. It was a fifty-fifty chance, congratulations on guessing correctly.::

::My guesses are—::

::Exactly as reliable as a coin flip,:: Alexis interrupts with a huff, ::just like everyone else’s.::

“As entertaining as this is,” the man cuts in, a hint of humor hiding amongst the steel, “I would like to ask what it is you two have just done to that boy, baku-san, baku-san.”

::Begun to heal him,:: Erich answers.

The man’s expression hardens. “I was unaware that baku were skilled in healing soul-wounds.”

::We aren’t, but why should we be limited to only our skills?:: Alexis asks. She tips her head and bares her teeth, ears laid back against her skull. ::Inari Ōkami was more than happy to lend her aid to our cause.::

The man grows still. Fragments of emotion creep into his aura, faint and muddy and barely enough for Erich to sense, but still /there/. Still enough to prove that he cares, that he worries. “And you think whatever this is will help?”

::We know it will.:: Erich says with confidence.

The man grimaces and tugs at the brim of his hat, gaze drifting away from them to land on the boy’s window. “Fine. But if you cause him harm, if this ‘solution’ of yours only makes him worse—”

::You have been trying, haven’t you,:: Alexis interrupts. She stalks forward and rears up on her hind legs, leaning in to peer closely at the man. ::That’s why you’ve been stalking us, because you were wondering if we were doing something you could capitalize on.::

“Yes,” he admits readily enough, undaunted by the way Alexis is practically looming over him. “Everything I could devise… all my theories fell apart when I tried to bring them to fruition. The human soul is an intricate affair, and the damage to his is immense. When I saw what you were doing to his soul, attempting to staunch the wound, I… wondered.”

Erich grimaces and shakes his head. ::That is no more than a stopgap. The soul can heal, but his is too damaged to do so on its own. He needs outside assistance, and that is what Inari Ōkami has provided.::

“I had suspected, but…” the man sighs and steps back from Alexis, shoulders slumping with exhaustion. “My best theory was to provide an infusion of a large quantity of reiatsu all at once, but I can’t produce that much alone. Not quickly enough to help…”

::It wouldn’t do him any favors,:: Alexis says, dropping back to all fours and giving the man a sad look. ::His soul might heal from it, but the myōbu told us that /he/ must heal himself, else a fragility will be introduced to his soul. We cannot force healing upon him.::

The man frowns at them. “Isn’t that what you’re doing, though? You’ve not approached him, not asked him for his agreement—”

::But whether or not he heals is up to him,:: Erich says. ::We are giving him the strength and the template. How he makes use of that… that is up to his subconscious will.::

“How soon will you know?”

Erich trades a look with Alexis, then shakes his head. He hadn’t even considered asking. ::We don’t know.::

::Perhaps a week?:: Alexis offers. At Erich’s curious look, she lifts a paw and mimes a shrug. ::With the sort of healing he’s doing, and the time you estimated, a week seems about right for the first signs.::

The man sighs and fidgets with his cane, gaze flickering between them and the boy’s window once again. “Alright,” he finally agrees. “Alright. One week. And if there’s no sign, or if he becomes /worse/, I will not hesitate to chase you off.”

Erich blinks at the threat, one ear swiveling back in confusion. From the man’s aura and the way he so effortlessly pretended Alexis didn’t exist despite her best efforts, ‘chase them off’ seems… laughably light. He expected to need to fight the man— /still/ expects it, honestly— and instead he’s being threatened with… being run off?

Some of his confusion must be clear to the man, because he coughs awkwardly and rubs at the back of his head. “You… I’ve been watching you. And… you /are/ helping them. More than I’ve been able to. I also know very well what it’s like to try and try and still make everything worse.”

::The boy will be fine,:: Alexis does her best to reassure. ::He will heal and be whole once more.::

::He will be changed, however,:: Erich warns, deciding that the man should be made aware of the consequences of their actions. ::He is being healed by a divine gift born of Inari Ōkami and strengthened by her myōbu. A human cannot be touched by so much kami and yokai power without being influenced by it.::

“But he’ll live,” the man says. He squares his shoulders when Erich and Alexis both nod in agreement. “Then so be it. Kurosaki-kun is an adaptable young man, he’ll manage.”

Erich is not entirely certain it will be so easy, but the less conflict the better. And, in all likelihood, the man will help Kurosaki to adapt.

::If that is all, we have our duties to perform,:: Alexis says, gaze turning away from the man and towards one of the other teens. ::Remember, you gave us a week.::

“I remem— woah!” The man straightens sharply as Alexis bolts past him, close enough to touch. He casts an exasperated look at Erich and says, “I thought your companion would stop doing that once they knew I could see you both.”

Erich lifts a paw and mimes a shrug. He’d expected exactly what she’d done, honestly. ::Now that she knows you can see her, she’ll probably begin to see how far she can push you.:: He laughs at the man’s blank, disbelieving gaze. ::There are not many who can see us, so you’re interesting. Along with how well you pretended you /couldn’t/…::

“Oh dear…”

::You’ll be fine. Just try not to die of a heart attack,:: Erich advises dryly. ::That would make you boring.::

“Well… I wouldn’t want to be that,” the man responds faintly, clearly uncertain how to take Erich’s words.

Erich laughs and rises to his feet, stalking past the man on his way towards another of the teens. ::No, you certainly wouldn’t.:: And with those entirely unreassuring words, he bounds off to continue his duty, leaving the man sputtering in protest behind him.

[sakura-warrior]

Instead of Glass, There Was Ice: Chapter 3

So after nearly a year of not updating (yikes), I decided to work on the next chapter of this fanfic. 

In case you need a bit of a refresher or are new to the story, here are the links to the previous chapters:

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3:

Hinamori barely got any sleep that night. Whenever she’d try to close her eyes, flashbacks of the last 24 hours would jolt her awake. Memories of the Aizen’s letter… the trial… and of her childhood friend, surrounded by a bunch of unconscious bodies with an indifferent look on his face…..

That last one hurt the most.

When it was finally time for her to get up and get ready for the long day ahead of her, she did so with little enthusiasm. In fact, her body seemed to move on its own out of habit, her mind elsewhere. She barely even heard the repeated knocks on her door, confirming if that she was ready for the day’s journey. And when she finally mustered up the courage to open the door and face the day, she was met with two unfamiliar faces who looked like they’d much rather drag her to the Maggot’s Nest then escort her to the world of the living. And Hinamori was pretty sure that they were only the first set of unwelcoming faces that she was going to have to face before the day was over.

Without so much as a word, the two guards abruptly turned around and began to walk back along the corridors of the 5th division. They didn’t even bother to look back once to see if Hinamori was actually following along behind them as they made their way to their next destination. Though the idea of simply not following them did cross her mind, the lieutenant was quick to shrug it off and join her escorts. As rude their behaviour was, at least they didn’t try to handcuff her like the criminal they assumed she was.

During their walk to the gate, Hinamori couldn’t help but notice the looks she getting. Although she tried her best to resist the temptation to look around, she still managed to catch the odd glimpse of people stopping and whispering to each as she walked by. And although she couldn’t hear what exactly they were saying, it didn’t take a prodigy to know that it wasn’t anything nice.  

When the gate finally came into view, Hinamori was shocked to see two faces that she actually recognized, both of which were shooting reassuring smiles her way.

“Hinamori-kun, you’re finally here!” Kira yelled as he waved her over. “I was starting to think you weren’t going to show!”

“Um, Kira, I don’t think she had much of a choice” Abarai replied with a quick sigh before turning to face his newly arrived friend. “It looks like you’ve had one hell of rude awakening this morning” he added as he shot a quick glance at Hinamori’s escorts. “Don’t worry, you don’t look that terrible”.

Before Hinamori could respond, she was tackled from behind and pulled into a hug. “Don’t be rude, Abarai” a feminine voice said. “Even with only a few hours of sleep, she still looks much better than you.”

“R-Rangiku-san?” Hinamori stuttered. “You’re coming too?”

“Yup!” Matsumoto happily replied, giving the fifth division lieutenant quick squeeze before letting her go and facing her. “You didn’t think I was going to let you guys go on a trip without me, did you?”

Hinamori didn’t know what to say. For the last few hours, she had felt so utterly alone. Her world falling apart around her. And now, she was surrounded by nothing but warm and welcoming faces… Surrounded by people who truly cared about her and believed in her...

She then thought that maybe, just maybe, things might be okay.

“Oops, looks like we missed the heartful reunion, Kuchiki-san” a playful voice stated, breaking the loving atmosphere in the air. “And here I was so looking forward to it. Oh well!”

Hinamori suddenly felt a pit in her stomach. Turning around, she saw Ichimaru and the younger kuchiki sibling walk towards them. All it took was one look at the 3rd division captain’s face to be reminded of the situation she was in and how she had gotten into it. Out of all the available captains of the 13 court guard squads, why did their supervising captain have to be him? Could her luck get any worse?

“Looks like we’ll be relying on your human expertise for this one, Rukia” Abarai said with a smirk as he broke the tension in the air and greeted his childhood friend. “Try not to screw it up, okay?”

“Oh, please, Renji. We all know the only screw up here is you” the short girl quick replied with a smirk of her own. “Trust me, no one understands humans better than I do.”

“Alright, everyone, let’s get moving” Ichimaru stated as he ushered everyone towards the gate. “We have a long day ahead of us, after all.”

With one last look at the word she was leaving behind, Hinamori joined the rest of her comrades and stepped through the gate to commenced her journey to the world of the living.

Once they got their gigais at Urahara’s shop, Kuchiki informed them all of the cover story she came up with for their mission. In order to blend in with normal human society, she suggested that she, Kira, Abarai, Hinamori, and Matsumoto should pose as high school students at the school Kurosaki Ichigo and his friends attended. Ichimaru, due to his older looking appearance, would pose as the school’s new teacher. This way, not only would they be able to blend in, but it also meant that they would be constantly near the substitute shinigami, who Kuchiki assured would gladly help out if anything happened.

Hinamori wouldn’t have described Kurosaki as “happy to help” when the group of them dropped by his school unannounced, but that was just her opinion….

When the lunch bell rang to signal their one hour break, Hinamori was quick to try and get out of the stuffed classroom. With the chaos their busy morning getting settled into the world of the living, she needed some down time to herself. But when she tried to leave the classroom unaccompanied, she was stopped by a chilling voice.

“Now, now, Hinamori-kun, where do you think you’re going?” Ichimaru called as he approached her with one of his infamous smiles. “Don’t ya know you’re not supposed to be on your own? We can’t risk anything bad happening to our lovely little hostage- I mean comrade, now, can we?”

“Ichimaru-tai- Err, I mean, Ichimaru-sensei is right!” Kira was quick to add in before Hinamori could reply. “What if he hurts you when you’re alone?! There’s no way I’m letting that filthy traitor get his hands on you, Hinamori, so don’t you worry about a thing!”

It took all the strength Hinamori had not to snap at Kira. How could he possibly suggest that Hitsugaya would hurt her!? Not to mention, last time she checked, Kira had nearly gotten himself killed the last time he faced the former tenth division captain. So what made him think he could possibly stand a chance against him?

“Hey, Hinamori, how about we grab lunch on the roof, okay?” Matsumoto chimed in with the hopes of diffusing the situation before it got any worse. “I know we aren’t supposed to go up there, but I’m sure we can find a way!”

Not trusting herself yet to speak, Hinamori could only nod in response before being dragged out of the classroom by voluptuous lieutenant. The 10th division officer seemed quite eager to get out of there before either of the 3rd division officers had a chance to object.

Once on the rooftop, the strawberry blond let go of her friend’s arm and commenced to walk towards the railing. Taking in the view of the sky above her, she let out a sigh.

“I can’t believe Kira…” she spoke with a shrug. “You’d think that with all those brains of his he would have an ounce of common sense, but I that’s just too much to hope for.”

“...What do you mean, Rangiku-san?” Hinamori asked as she joined her friend, choosing her words carefully along the way.

“I mean exactly what I said” Matsumoto replied. “Like taichou would ever hurt you of all people! God, ever since this whole thing happened, it’s like everyone has forgotten everything they ever knew about him… I mean, sure, he could have faked some of it, but I doubt he faked everything… Taichou is still the same person he always was. He’s just… Well…. Sigh, I don’t know...”

“So… You still believe in him, then?” Hinamori timidly questioned, shocked to hear that someone besides herself didn’t think that her childhood friend was a total monster.

“...I want to” the 10 division lieutenant replied with another sigh. “I want to believe that all those years together weren’t just lies, you know? You spend so much time with a person… It’s hard to believe that they’re suddenly not who they said they were…. That they never were who they said they were… I don’t know what’s going through his head right now, or even why he’s doing all this, but… There must be a reason. There’s no way taichou would do all this… Put us through all this… if there wasn’t a good reason for it. There’s just no way.”

Hinamori felt a single tear start to make its way down her cheek. Hearing someone else say the words she desperately wanted to hear washed over her as a tidal wave of relief. If someone else, someone who really knew him, also couldn’t think of him as a traitor, then maybe there was still some hope left…

Some hope that maybe, just maybe, her childhood friend would come back to her.

“Oh, Hinamori…” Matsumoto whispered as she rubbed the crying girl’s back in support. “It’s hard, isn’t it? Hearing people talk about him like that? They just don’t know him like we do… or, at least, how we thought we knew him.”

“R-Rangiku-san…” Hinamori muttered as she let out all the emotions she had bottle up in the last two days. “He wouldn’t just leave, right? Leave me… leave us… without a reason, right? There has to be a reason!... There just has to be…”

“There’s no way he would ever leave you, Hinamori. You should know that by now” Matsumoto said with a comforting smile. “I mean, if it was just me he left behind, then maybe… but… For him to leave you… Well, there’s no way he would do that willingly, that’s for sure. Hell, if the rest of the Seireitei thought he didn’t care about you, then they wouldn’t have us under constant surveillance, now, would they?”

“...Us? What do you mean us?” the fifth division lieutenant asked in confusion.

“Wait, you didn’t seriously think you’re the only one they’re keeping an eye on, did you?” Matsumoto replied. “Sure, you’re his closest friend and all, but I was his second in command. They’d be total idiots not to be suspicious of me. So by having the two of us along on this mission, they’re killing two birds with one stone.”

“So I guess that just makes us a couple of caged birds… huh?” Hinamori joked with a weak smile, her tears long since dried up.

“Looks like we’ll just have to flock together, Hinamori” Matsumoto answered with a laugh.

By the end of the day, Hinamori was exhausted and could have collapsed on the spot. She forgot how tiring it was to be in classes all day, especially when she was desperately trying to understand what was going on. Sure, it wasn’t as though she needed to pass the classes for her mission, but she had always been one who enjoyed learning new things regardless of how trivial they might be. And she also gladly welcomed the distraction the lessons provided her from the current situation.

It had been decided earlier that day that she, Matsumoto, and Ichimaru would be staying over at Inoue Orihime’s house during the course of their stay in the world of the living. Abarai and Kira were to stay over at Urahara’s and Kuchiki was to stay over at Kurosaki’s, despite the substitute Shinigami’s many protests. Although Kira had initially objected to the idea of them separating at night, which he argued to be the ideal time for Hitsugaya to make an appearance, Ichimaru was quick to silence him on the matter. And for the first time that day, Hinamori was grateful to the third division captain. As much as Hinamori liked Kira, she couldn’t handle another second of him constantly bearing over her like some sort of guard dog.

When she reached the Inoue residence along with the others, Hinamori was glad that the day was finally over and she could be alone with her thoughts. So when the opportunity presented itself, Hinamori was quick to exit out of her bedroom window to relax on the rooftop. She thought that as long as she didn’t go far, there wouldn’t be any harm. Besides, with the window still open, the people down below would be able to hear anything if she was loud enough. So Hinamori figured she’d be safe.

Having heard earlier that day that Matsumoto harbored the same doubts that she did was a huge weight off her shoulders. Even if she was no closer to uncovering the answer as she was the day before, just knowing that she had someone else she could confide in was enough. It was one more thing that she had that she didn’t have the day before. And maybe tomorrow, she would take another step forward in figuring out the secret behind her childhood friend’s sudden betrayal.

“Oh Hitsugaya-kun….” Hinamori muttered to herself as she stared at the starry sky above. “Just what are you doing?”

“I’m stood here talking to you, what else would I be doing?” a familiar voice suddenly spoke, shocking Hinamori to the core.

[nkajima]

I’ve translated Sexy Zone’s interview in the latest issue of TVnavi SMILE! As it is my first translation project and I’m still learning Japanese, there are bound to be some inaccuracies and mistakes. Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy this interview! I had a lot of fun translating it and look forward to posting more of my translations.

Credits for the original scans are to yoshiko_mama on LJ!

Sexy Zone has released their single ‘Gyutto’, the theme song for the drama ‘Wagahai no Heya de Aru’ starring Kikuchi Fuma. From these five people with sharp feelings and senses, we received their confessions and views on their work and motivations.

Q. What was a recent moment where you felt warm or healed?

Marius: I was healed when I watched the news about the pandas at Ueno Zoo. But because I was watching it for a while, I guess I felt somewhat sorry for them. Later at a big retail store, I bought about four cheap and soft cushions. Because they were so fluffy and I put them on top of the sofa, I felt so comfortable even by myself. I thought about watching my favorite drama and while I was watching, I didn’t realize that I fell asleep. When I noticed it was something like 2 AM in the morning, I said ‘Oh no, I have to brush my teeth’. I was troubled because it was too comfortable (lol). 

Shori: Because I’m a little embarrassed about being healed, I honestly do not want to say much as a guy (lol). Well, I guess it’s the parakeet I own named ‘Ki’. Because she’s lonely, if I take her out of the bird cage, she goes on my shoulder and always follows me. It didn’t feel like I worked hard to tame her, since the beginning she follows me. Well, I’m certainly healed (lol).

Sou: When I work with Marius, I feel warm and healed. Even if Marius doesn’t concentrate and I get a little irritated, I still fawn over him and feel that he’s cute and I forgive everything (lol). When I say things like ‘Marius is cute today, too~’, he cutely replies with ‘Sou-chan, thank you~’. Because this kind of thing seems like Marius, even if he’s becoming more and more of an adult, I want this Marius as he is now always. 

Fuma: We went to an elementary school to record the PV for our new song ‘Gyutto’, and there were notices for the PV screening telling fathers, mothers, and friends to ‘Please come and see it’. When I picked up one such notice, a child had written ‘If you can, please come and see it.’ I was almost crying because of such kindness. When I was 4 years old, it was such an ordinary feeling for my parents to come see me (lol). Because I saw that as I’m now becoming an adult, I thought it was a caring and kind child and it healed me. 

Kento: I went to see an original animated American movie, but, ah….is it okay if I only talk about movies? Anyways…I was healed by the cuteness of the leading actress (lol)! She is a princess who grew up on an island with only women, but one day, she meets a lost pilot who changes her life. When the two of them are about to kiss, the scene is zoomed out. Somehow, this becomes more effective than directly showing the kiss. I don’t know why, but I was strangely healed. 

Q. What is something you’ve received recently that motivated you?

Shori: I guess it’s Mr. Children’s single ‘himawari’. The songs are awesome, and I watched a documentary that comes with the CD. It shows how Sakurai (Kazutoshi) san makes songs, and things like how the members of Mr. Children produce those songs and thus their production process is followed. I’ve always liked Mr. Children. I somehow thought Sakurai-san was the center of the group, but in reality, all four members work together. They would say, ‘Okay, let’s try changing the drums a little bit’, and the instruments are changed. Then the bass is also slightly changed to match the rhythm, and the small details are steadily adjusted by the four members. All the members of the band become able to derive one sound. Because that was the first time I became aware of this, it was fun and I learned a lot.

Sou: If it’s other than Johnny’s, I watch overseas artists’ performances that I think would be good to draw motivation from. Right now, I’m watching overseas dramas. People from overseas, and Marius too, their gestures are amazing. It’s because of their expressive ability. If it’s in a drama it will be exaggerated, but because on stage you’re asked for it, when I watch overseas performances I think I can make some use of the stage. 

Marius: The other day when I went to Harajuku for shopping, a huge crowd of people were lined up to buy a brand’s collaboration bag. It felt like you couldn’t go through the road at all. Although it’s an incredibly popular brand, the more I think about it, everyone wanted that one bag, and I thought it was amazing that hundreds of people were lined up. The power that “thing” has is enough to attract everyone into making them believe they like it. I am not a “thing”, but I’d like to think I have that kind of charm. And Sexy Zone also. I feel that I do my own shopping after deciding the basics. I go shopping slowly, but if I have no time, I look at a store’s stock in advance and buy things only by fitting the size.

Kento: The other day, I cried in a movie theater after a long time. Originally, I wanted to watch a film by Tsukikawa Sho, who was the same director as ‘Kurosaki-kun no Iinari ni Nante Naranai’, and by chance my friend recommended it to me, saying “It was good so you should go see it”. The heroine’s indescribable idol feeling contrasted with the main hero’s real feeling. Already then, the main hero’s feeling of emptiness is really painful….my heart was pained. I still have not been able to meet the director, but I want to tell him soon that it was awesome!!! 

Fuma: I was motivated by Eito-niisan’s (Kanjani 8) live performance. 50 minutes after the opening, I was surprised that it become an all-band performance. They really didn’t move from the stage, and because I like bands it was cool. When I want to see them, they made a mistake, but then the members laughed after. They said, “Sorry, sorry, let’s try one more time!”, and then decided to completely start over from the beginning. I got goosebumps from wondering if there was ever a living feeling like this seen in Johnny’s live performances so far. The feeling of the members and the fans was also really nice. After that, they came out with completely sparkling costumes as if it was the opening once more. The non-moving band was intense, and it seemed that the audience was getting really excited because a part of them was kept in suspense.

Q. What is something you’ve learned in a recent work?

Shori: As expected it’s my ‘Summer Paradise’ live performance. It was hard for me to make, so I learned a lot. Since I had been making the original draft since May while on tour with Sexy Zone, I wondered if it was possible to complete it. Creating a live performance is sometimes fun or painful, but either way it’s normal to have both feelings. I think that in work it’s also basic. 

Sou: In specific terms, although it’s difficult, it’s more fun to do something with goals in mind so I become aware that I’m trying to create tasks one by one and clear them. For example, on a variety show communication is important, so first you remember the names of the performers, and then you speak on your own accord, and if you act frankly it becomes easier to speak on the show. In that case, it would be good if I can get a chance to do this. Since I already know the position of where I stand in the group, it’s a question as to how I can make use of it and respond to myself. But if I go overboard in trying to be funny, it becomes a type that’s not funny at all (lol). I normally try to challenge myself as much as possible, and when the members pick up on it at an irrelevant time, I guess it becomes something like flowers blooming (lol)?

Marius: I saw Shori-kun’s Summer Paradise concert and his balance was amazing and easy to see. I didn’t get tired like at an ordinary concert, and I felt refreshed while watching it. Every segment flowed with the selected songs, making a concert where it’s easy to see the direction of its course. Unlike I imagined, I became really energetic. For our concerts also, I discussed how to skillfully combine my ideas with Sou-chan’s and I learned a lot. 

Q. What are you learning on set of your movie ‘Miseinen Dake Kodomo Janai’? 

Kento: Director Hanabusa’s stance on set is truly amazing. I’m learning a lot from him, or perhaps I should say I’ve completely fallen in love with him (lol). Before filming, he always comes to the makeup room where the cast is preparing. ‘How are you today? Nao-kun (my character’s name) how are you?’, he tells me. And then, while explaining the scene we’re to shoot that day, he tells us in the kitchen how he wants to film the scene. His sincere attitude in approaching his work is cool, and he’s also really funny and makes us laugh a lot. I’m learning a lot through his personality and his way of creating an atmosphere on set. I love you, Director Hanabusa!

Q. What are you learning on set of your leading drama ‘Wagahai no Heya de Aru’?

Fuma: Because I’m by myself in the drama I have a lot of lines, and although I managed to get two episodes in my head before we started filming, I shot one episode in two days and just like that I’ve exhausted my memory (lol).  In the morning I memorize my lines, and then again during lunch breaks, and also during my evening breaks. It’s a drama, but it’s also an everyday challenge on the limit of my memorization ability (lol).