#know no one cares so im just going to play skyrim. good evening to anyone reading until the end of this

[succubi-tch]

.

[in-my-feels-probably]

Hello congrats on 600! I'm kinda new here but I'd like to partake in the celebration of that okay haha I'd like option 2, pretty much anyone from Game Of Thrones would be great.

My name's Shyann, I'm a bisexual ace with she/they pronouns. My personality type is infj and my love language is gifts. I'm also a Libra! I'm so super duper tall with a very tall height of 4'11. I got a brown wolf cut (my hair needs cut again lmao) and hazel eyes that I can't see too good out of. My vision sucks, but my glasses look cute at least I think.

I'm a rather shy and quiet person, I don't really talk too much unless I'm with my friends or family or if someone mentions something I'm interested in, in that case I will not shut up. (Said interests include: Skyrim, Marvel, GOT, The Witcher, Red Dead Redemption, and a handful of YouTubers) I spend a lot of my time playing video games and cosplaying. My music taste is mostly rock (Shinedown being my favorite band) but I'll also listen to anything for Cupcakke to Taylor Swift to Minecraft songs.

I would consider myself to be a pretty caring person. I guess you could say I'm bit of a people pleaser. In school I mostly kept to myself but my grades were always great. I was one of those kids that teachers were like "Oh! She's a pleasure to have in class!" Outside of school though? I'm surprised my dumbass is managing to live on her own.

I'm a chaotic mess, with a horrendous sleep schedule but I'm here. Thanks for reading this and doing these. They've been really nice to read. I like your writing! The 600 is very well deserved! :) 💕

hi! thank you so much for participating :)

i’ve actually closed my request for these ships, so i’m not doing them anymore until i hit 700.

i posted a message about it last night. i know not many people have seen it, so don’t worry if you haven’t. don’t worry about sending this in, i still enjoyed reading it.

i feel bad about you typing all of this out, so i’m still gonna ship you with someone and write you a little blurb. i’m sorry if this isn’t what you were looking for, maybe my next follower’s celebration i can do something you’d like more.

anyways, i ship you with jon!

i think he’d find it adorable that you’re so chaotic, he’d get a kick out of you being a mess. it takes a lot for him to smile and be less serious, but you’d do or say something that would make him laugh and forget about whatever was bothering him, even if it was just for a moment.

you’d stumble out of bed in the morning, tired from going to bed too late. you’d rush to get ready, and jon would find you in courtyard or something, while you were hurrying to get wherever you were going.

he’d bite his tongue to keep himself from laughing. he’d take a breathe, willing himself not to grin too hard. “for a well educated and well brought up person, my lady, you really do know how to make it look like you’ve never lived a routine day in your life.”

you’d roll your eyes, waving him away. “it’s a real talent of mine. now hush, im tired and im late.”

he’d smile, holding out his arm for you to take. “i’ll walk with you, my lady. make sure you get where you’re going without further incident. i have a feeling you may need the assistance.”

he’d laugh even harder as you glared at him, grudgingly taking his arm. but you’d know he wasn’t trying to be mean, and that he actually very much enjoyed your company. him teasing you brought a smile too his face, and you were willing to accept it if it meant you got to see him smile more.

[katewaliss]

! write with me or fight with me!

you either die by my sword or the most painful head canons imaginable! *merida vc* choose yer fate

just kidding!

 hey there gaymers, i am crissy! i am 22, live in pst, go by she/her pronouns and honestly would very much like a distraction from life -- preferably in the form of 1x1 and rp in general. i am currently doing online school plus trying/failing at adulting, being a crazy pink haired college student living on microwave dimsum with my crazy fluffy demon cat, but that still leaves me with a lot of time and what better way to spend that time then crying and dying, am i right, boys? 

so without further ado ( adieu? idk gusundheit ) here are a list of discomboblulated plot things that have been floating around in my head that i might be fun to do ( plot fragments, ideas, ocs, fcs i like, settings, genres etc )! i’d prefer a message if u liked any of these in the inbox or dm form, my tumblr ims are open and my discord user is mr. worldwide#2918 ( pitbull supremacy ) but if ur shy i will message u and be annoying! 

lastly: i prefer hcing in the dms to replies, however i will do replies/ask memes slowly, i don’t really like making blogs and prefer google docs/discord and i ask ( gently and respectfully ) that minors do not interact.

thank u and happy hunger games! xx

COLLEGE TOTALLY SPIES -- i was really obsessed with this picture right here and i thought that the picture would be a good premise for a little four person group based on totally spies. i was thinking that these three college students/young adults some friends maybe not some enemies or just on completely different ends of the social agenda get bonded together when they accidentally end up roped in a top secret spy organization that is fronted by a record store. the details and flesh of the plot i think would be cute to figure out all together maybe in a google doc or a big discord so we can make the rp to perfect world building specifications. right now i have two spots open! 

my friend lexi over at comradc has taken the cool goth asian girl and is using lyrica okano

i am playing the freckly backwards hat lesbian in the red polo named aj mccallis and i think im using diana silvers ( not sure might switch to tati rodriguez )

we also have the cute blond girl w the dyed hair who is giving me kind of like sydney sweeney energies, blonde girl maybe like lalisa manoban/jinsoul,

and we have the rad black girl with the bandids who i would only accept black fcs for for such as diamond white, ryan destiny, salem mitchell, 

i’d prefer if this stayed kind of sapphic and female and enby friendly. we can def make make npcs and characters but i’d prefer if the characters looked like they do in the picture ( minus the white girls who can be racebent as long as there are vibes ) mostly bc i want the poc people to stay the correct poc! but yeah! if u like this message me specifically!!!!! seperately and hit me w a role ud like maybe an fc an idea anything < 3 im working on a google doc and discord sever

- i really want to play a himbo skater boy evan mock like its my dream i know nothing abt him other than he probably goes by something like mouth or juice or tris or dex or dante but !!!! he has buzzed hair he buzzes designs into, does stick n pokes, hates cops, will kiss anyone, likes to mosh at house shows, smokes a lot and sounds like crush from finding nemo, probably ur parents worst nightmare if im honest rodrick heffley energy -- adopt him for any plot

- i also really am obsessed with simay barlas who is my mascot rn -- i want to play her in some sort of dark academia setting with like gossip girl blair waldorf energies lu from elite and have her be really mean and cold and pretentious and play the cello and probably have secrets and be uptight idk the name mallory is resonating hard w me ( we could even do a gossip girl the secret history type group if people liked that ) 

-ok i also really really want to play streak aka silas montgomery who is like very like sidekick best friend to the golden boy main character, does a kick ass goat impression, class clown, relentlessly hits on like the most difficult person in school, does crazy things for laughs and attention, just wants to make people happy, only wears hawaiian shirts, finger guns, is going nowhere in life, his dad is probably the dean at whatever prestigious school also he is very very depressed and drinks often! love u! a I Feel Like Im The Worst So I Always Act Like Im The Best electra heart baby PINTEREST

also yes his hair is pink reg verse he did it on a dare but hp verse he did a potion wrong and it never came out

SOMEONE DO A LADY HANNIBAL WILL GRAHAM RP KILLING EVE RP W ME! i made this will graham adjacent gal for a genderbent hannigram rp her name is bisexual disaster enida johnson and sometimes goes by needy or will bc her middle name is willamena! has basically all the will things wears flannels is a mess but has a bunch of cats instead of dogs in her woods log cabin and im using crystal reed bc it fits perfect in my head idk if u like her hmu hit me w a lady hannibal PINTEREST

other stuff

ok i really want to do a princess and knight plot but with knight zendaya and princess anya taylor joy ???? ALKHALKSHALK LITERALLY HELLO literally modern or like dnd style i do not care but know i love dnd! we could make it like them goin on some skyrim quests like hi

speaking of dnd and skyrim if anyone wants to do like anything based in dnd stuff or skyrim stuff i am DOWN

jennifers body plot!!!! maybe set in college!!!!! sounds spicy i will do a f/f or m/m version leggo leggo 

UNTIL DAWN UNTIL DAWN!!!! i wanted to do a little like 6 person or mumu until dawn thing where everyone either makes new characters or characters based on the existing six! i made a girl adjacent josh character named riley PINTEREST who i love very much ( fc might change im thinking maybe medallion rahimi ) pls hmu if ur down

i looooooove breakfast at tiffanys!!!! like i really love breakfast at tiffanys we love a call girl broody author ship and i want to play a mishti rahman holly golightly type character so so bad 

pygmalion plot!!! basically like an author and the main character of their book comes to life and the book character is probably from a different period of time or realm so doesnt know how to do modern 2020 stuff like microwaves and the tv! and then maybe they get sucked into the characters book world thats written by the author and have to navigate that! enchanted! w the kdrama! energy!

GOSSIP GIRL PLOT ENERGIES

any sort of the secret history murder society until dawn ahs horror type setting i am on a kick rn 

i still really want a deaf sailor and siren plot bc that is so spicy or even like anything involving sirens like maybe one thats like vegetarian and doesnt like to eat humans so it ariel rescues one and keeps it safe!! or like only men are susceptible to the sirens song but aha! i am a woman! Romance!

anything in the realm of percy jackson i love mythology lets go i kind of want a echo narcisuss plot and i want it to hurt me so bad 

i will do harry potter stuff but only if its completely removed from the current canon like years in the future no existing families also maybe beauxbatons salem and drumstrang plots bc thats what matters

iiiiiiiii really like anime so i will do anything kakegurui, soul eater, ohshc

i kind of like grew up on the hunger games so i will gladly take any hunger games plots like young effie and haymitch is spicy or like a career tribute and one of the weaker poorer distracts enemies to lovers leggo

i have a kind of oc that had their parents die in a factory gas leak that was the governments fault and it turned them into a vigilante assasin that is slowly picking off bootlicker government people one by one pretending to be one of them until bam! gets attached to the rich asshole son or daughter of the head hauncho or one of the higher ups ... drama

rich little celebrity fussy wussy being held captive by the mafia and the tired stoic mafia guard but they fall in love 

i kind of like any plot that involves one person that is really loud or angry or dramatic or whiny and the other one is kind of sweet and gentle or does not talk much idk make brain happy 

speaking of!

no nonsense law student studying abroad in a european country and an artist there falls in love w them and is all romantic and gush and is like ur my muse!!! and they are like Go awAy and they explore the city together and themelseves its nice!

i want to be an avan jogia super villain idk why i need to but i do 

not to be a disney adult bc i am not but anastasia princesses dont kiss kitchen boys 

rival cheer captians? best friends brother? pop princess celebrity singer and like antiestablishment really angry rockstar in a publicity relationship? broody detective and sunshiney diner person that works at the diner they eat at everyday?

idk i will think of more hmu these can all be made f/f or m/m if they arent 

[simblrbreezycakes]

i was tagged by @chippedcupanddustybooks sweet bb. i am tagging @irrelephantsims @magnoliidae @simplymelaninated and anyone who hasn’t been tagged i swear i feel like the last person doing this LOL. heckin long ass questionnaire under the cut.

1. What is your full name? Brianna Leigh [Redacted] 2. What is your nickname? Breezy 3. Birthday? may 4th 4. What is your favorite book series? hmmmm series? idk.... i really like every single john grisham book and they aren’t related but when you have such a niche brand of book i feel like it counts lol.  5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? kinda on both. 6. Who is your favorite author? oh whew. tough one right here. idk man, i have a few? but if i had to choose i guezz i would say george orwell.   7. What is your favorite radio station? who tf listens to the radio like det anymore lmfao. i don’t have one. before i listened to 107.1 in memphis in the car sometimes, but i moved so. 8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? i loveeee pineapple anything. 9. What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? lit 10. What is your current favorite song? currently really into pink in the night by mitski and also sicko mode by travis scott.

11. What is your favorite word? good ole fuck(in/ed/etc.) i also really like voluptuous and bubbles. 12. What was the last song you listened to? last thing i listened to was another lifetime x nao.  13. What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch? absolutely check out the good place. also hilda, the dragon prince, she-ra princess of power, criminal minds, law and order (the original), and snapped. 14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? i used to watch the notebook religiously when it rained/felt upset like shit. but lately i’ve been watching say yes to the dress to combat my depression lol. 15. Do you play video games? yah 16. What is your biggest fear? dying alone and no one finding me. like literally alone not like meta alone “oh no one loves me” like dead ass alone somewhere isolated. 17. What is your best quality, in your opinion? hmmmmm idk that i care a lot about other people? 18. What is your worst quality, in your opinion? all of them lmfao. i’m annoying, i’m physically unattractive, i talk too damn much, i can be kind of a bitch both intentionally and unintentionally, i’m a trash writer, i can be selfish, and i self depreciate a lot (lol see above response “all of them”) and i’m sure that gets on people who love and care about me’s nerves ((but like....i mean it lmfao)) 19. Do you like cats or dogs better? whew tough. prolly cats though.  20. What is your favorite season? winter followed by a tie between spring and fall.  21. Are you in a relationship? nah lmfao.  22. What is something you miss from your childhood? not being so fuckin ugly and depressed lmfao. 23. Who is your best friend? “my person” as greys anatomy stans would say is ivy lynn [redacted] [redacted] but i also wanna shout out my home girl mary (i know you follow me on here), my home girl christina (also follows me on here but she never checks her simblr anymore), my smoothie gang bitches, my NSA bitches (which includes both ivy and mary lmfao), and my memphis as fuck family. honorable mention to loml [redacted] who is skating on thin fucking ice with me right now lmfao. 24. What is your eye color? brown 25. What is your hair color? brown 26. Who is someone you love? don’t make me answer this tumblr gods. 27. Who is someone you trust? all my best friends, my parents, my brother. 28. Who is someone you think about often? fucking murder me @ this question lmfao. my friend kate (RIP) my grandmother grannypeg (RIP) and [redacted] 29. Are you currently excited about/for something? i’m excited to spend christmas in a new country! forging new traditions and all that. 30. What is your biggest obsession? currently i’m obsessed with wedding stuff and mens fashion and how mens fashion such as suits translates into womens fashion. we love a hot lady in a tailored suit amiright? 31. What was your favorite TV show as a child? spongebob squarepants RIP :”( 32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? [redacted] 33. Are you superstitious? kinda i guess? not really about stuff like stepping on cracks breaking mamas’ backs or opening umbrellas indoors but little things about familial traditions. 34. Do you have any unusual phobias? not really a phobia but i have misophonia. i also hate eye shit. like eye violence or anything fuckin around with eyes is a big no from me dawg. 35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? absolutely behind the camera. i used to be a theater kid so like being on stage i don’t mind but when it comes to the spotlight and being filmed??? no no no no no. lemme be a cinnamontawgrowfur all day.  36. What is your favorite hobby? watching movies, playing skyrim (I MISS IT SO MUCH), reading, watching music videos, modern calligraphy/hand lettering, baking (ALSO MISS IT MUCH) 37. What was the last book you read? lol a textbook about developing countries.

38. What was the last movie you watched? i just rewatched the swan princess the other day but in terms of watching something brand new i think it was this tom cruise movie my friend showed us and i thought she said someone else ( i don’t remember now. maybe tom hanks?) it was pretty good he was irish or sum with nicole kidman and they came to the united states and pretended to be siblings but the sexual tension was so fucking high dawg. 

39. What musical instruments do you play, if any? nothing i’m wack and a disappointment to my musically gifted family (my dad and brother)  40. What is your favorite animal?  polar bears followed by giraffes. 41. What are your top 5 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow? i’m gonna go with my main tumblr because ion wanna hurt nobody’s feelings but i follow a celebs of color page i really love, a fashion page i really love, and a few artists i really love. 42. What superpower do you wish you had? teleportation or shape shifting.  43. When and where do you feel most at peace?  i feel most at peace when it is raining and i’m in my room, everything is clean and tidy, candles are lit, i have nothing to do so the world is my oyster, i have a nice cup of coffee or hot cocoa or tea, and i just am v i b i n g.  44. What makes you smile? seeing my friends, my brother (when he isn’t pissing me off), funny videos of red dead people falling off their horse in cinematic mode, pretty flowers, cute art, round birds. 45. What sports do you play, if any? i don’t lmfao. 46. What is your favorite drink? honestly a frozen margarita no salt. 47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? a month ago.  48. Are you afraid of heights? absolutely. 49. What is your biggest pet peeve? people chewing with their mouths open and people talking to me like i’m incompetent/assuming i don’t know anything about what they’re trying to talk to me about especially if it is my area of expertise lol. 50. Have you ever been to a concert? hail yeah. many. 51. Are you vegan/vegetarian? nope! 52. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? honestly i don’t know but i have a distinct memory of a bunch of girls in my second grade, yours truly included, wanting to be strippers. and i don’t know why or how this came up or if we even truly knew what stripping meant but. yeah. OH i guess around the time i was in 4th/5th grade i started wanting to be a harvard law graduate and be a lawyer but i gave that up in like high school and then bounced being a lawyer back and forth in my noggin up until i applied for grad school. shout out to my mary for doing it though.  53. What fictional world would you like to live in? hmmmm idk. none of em really. 54. What is something you worry about? if i made the right decision(s) in life lol.  55. Are you scared of the dark? not really.  56. Do you like to sing? yeah i do! doesn’t mean i’m good at it though haha. 57. Have you ever skipped school? yeah lmfao. 58. What is your favorite place on the planet? i miss Rwanda a lot. but honestly my favorite place is wherever the people i love are. my family loves to travel so whenever i’m with someone i love sharing an experience? i’m in heaven. 59. Where would you like to live? idk anywhere i guess. somewhere it is mostly cold most of the time though haha. 60. Do you have any pets? my bb boi fred lives with my dad and my mom has a dog and 2 cats. we used to have 3 but one of em ran away when she moved to her house, we caught him, he ran away again. oh whale. 61. Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? oh a big time night owl. big time. 62. Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? honestly i like sunrises better but i am never awake to catch em hahah. 63. Do you know how to drive? yah and i fuckin love doing it. 64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? i prefer headphones. like really quality ones too. but i tend to use earbuds more often because i don’t need quality while im working out or going to class just easy grab and go. 65. Have you ever had braces? nope but i used to want some so bad. 66. What is your favorite genre of music? i love rap, dream-y pop music and dream-y rap music, i love 80s music. all 80s music really lmfao.  67. Who is your hero? mi mum and mi dad. also viola davis queen of inventing acting and every single color in the rainbow. 68. Do you read comic books? kind of. i was trying to build up a collection before i moved but i only had my BP comics. 69. What makes you the most angry? injustice and offensive ass content and behaviors. also don’t fuck with my friends. i got two dudes on my shit list right now that it is *on sight* if i ever see them again. 70. Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book? a real book all the way. idk what it is about digital reading my brain shuts the fuck down. i am super fast reader but the second i try and read something digitally it takes me maybe like 10-15 min to get through just a few sentences. 71. What is your favorite subject in school? history lol i was a history major. 72. Do you have any siblings? yeah my chicken nugget puppy brother dylan. asshole. 73. What was the last thing you bought? some historical romance i think? it’s in dutch so idrk.  74. How tall are you? 5′7 i think. 75. Can you cook? yeah i love cooking but saddly don’t do much of it. 76. What are three things that you love? my teddy bear my momma got me for valentines day, my st. agatha figurine, and my yikes tapestry mary got me. i realize now after reading the next question you probably meant like shit in general so. the smell of a fresh cup of coffee, snuggly warm sweaters, postcards and tiny gifts from friends. you know the ones “i just got this for you because i thought you’d like it” 77. What are three things that you hate? funky ass attitudes, the smell and feel of lavender oil, corn. 78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? female 79. What is your sexual orientation? i’m a big ole heterosexual. sorry to disappoint :/  80. Where do you currently live? the netherlands. 81. Who was the last person you texted? my friend and former roommate. today is her birthday. 82. When was the last time you cried? like an hour ago lmfao. 83. Who is your favorite YouTuber? i don’t have one haha. vevo i guess. 84. Do you like to take selfies? do i like taking them? not really. it takes me too damn long to get one that looks good enough. i like sending stupid selfies to friends though. 85. What is your favorite app? i use twitter probably the most but my favorite app is my spider solitaire game haha. 86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? we are very close. i would say both of my parents are my biggest supporters and cheerleaders but how they do that looks a bit different. my mom and i are very similar but sometimes how we handle certain things is very different so we can be the best of friends one day and the completely butt heads the next. 87. What is your favorite foreign accent? i loovveeeee a scottish accent and an irish accent. also tbrh i love a good southern boy drawl. like idk if i could play for you all the way this one dude who works with my mom talks? i would because i wanna bottle it and listen to it whenever i feel bad. 88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? i would really like to go to norway for my birthday. 89. What is your favorite number? i don’t have one. 90. Can you juggle? nope but i did try and learn i have a video of it somewhere lmfao. 91. Are you religious? kind of. i’m more spiritual than religious and lowkey hate saying that because it sounds so hoitietoitie but it’s true. 92. Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? the ocean. so much of it we haven’t explored. thinking about space makes me feel existential and dead inside.  93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? nah haha 94. Are you allergic to anything? yeah i’m supposed to take one claritin a day but like i don’t. 95. Can you curl your tongue? yeah 96. Can you wiggle your ears? nope :(  97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? i’ll admit i’m wrong if i’m actually wrong but you’re gonna have to a helluva lot of convincing to get me there lmfao. though if my being “wrong” has caused harm to someone else i’ll apologize quicker than lightning because the last thing i would want is for my stubbornness to hurt someone i love. 98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? um the mountains 99. What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? "never turn down a date. you never know who you might meet while you’re out” -my grandmother to my mother to me. 100. Are you a good liar? lmfaooooo i am a reformed liar. 101. What is your Hogwarts House? HUFFLEPUFF BAYBEEE 102. Do you talk to yourself? yah 103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? an introvert. i may be loud and talkative sis but i promise you i’m over compensating because i want you to like me lmfao. 104. Do you keep a journal/diary? i have a private twitter does that count. 105. Do you believe in second chances? depends. 106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do?imma keep it real with you chief i would keeps the money lmfao. in the past i would’ve tried to return it to the owner but i am big broke bois with a lot of unexpected expenses coming up so like... yeah lmfao. we keepin that coint. 107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? sometimes. 108. Are you ticklish? yes lmfao 109. Have you ever been on a plane? yeah! 110. Do you have any piercings? yah i got my lobes pierced one on each ear, my nose, and a cartilage piercing. 111. What fictional character do you wish was real? my girl nancy drew. 112. Do you have any tattoos? yeah i got 2 of em. 113. What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? idk lmfao. probably when i applied for cityterm and when i appled to go back to undergrad. 114. Do you believe in karma? Yeah but not in a “oh you hurt me? you’re gonna get your come uppins” way but in a every action affects your soul and your being kinda way.  115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? im supposed to wear glasses but ask me if im wearing em right now lmfao. 116. Do you want children? presently i don’t see myself wanting or having kids but i want to foster. 117. Who is the smartest person you know? my friends lol. 118. What is your most embarrassing memory? literally every single memory has a tinge of embarassment lol. but probz when i walked into the cafeteria my first day of highschool as a smol freshman and my knees locked up and i fell forward and my giant ass backpack (because i never used my locker ever in any grade) wrapped around my neck and had me stuck in a strange position in the middle of the parting of the tables in the cafeteria.  119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? hell yeah lmfao. 120. What color are most of you clothes? blue or black 121. Do you like adventures? yeah! 122. Have you ever been on TV? yeah but like on the news and shit. 123. How old are you? 24 124. What is your favorite quote? i carry your heart (i carry it in my heart) 125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? OOF TOUGH BUT UHHH probz sweet. 

[romlyndreth]

My turn for an ask! Why Romlyn? What's his appeal to you? I always just saw him as this kinda sketchy laborer, but I assume there has to be more going on there.

OH I gotta address this about Romlyn smuggling mead. At first it seems like he’s only looking out for number one. But as you read the letters left around the Black Briar Meadery you learn Maven is literally cutting their pays so much they aren’t making anything. To the point she thinks they are playing pranks on her so she has a reason to cut their check entirely. This is good enough proof why Romlyn would go about selling her mead, he makes it, he could do this on his own if he had the freedom to but the Black briar meadery is full of mer mostly Dunmer. As if Maven has a targeted audience. Maven even can become Jarl of Riften. And she has connections to the Thieves Guild and your first job as the Dragonborn is to frame Brandshei like literally once you arrive there.And then you can even turn in Romlyn thinking he’s no good. But when you get to know the state of oppression Dunmer live in Riften due to Maven and the Thieves Guild. It becomes more obvious that Dunmer do what they have to survive and that is Romlyn’s way. He is surviving and that’s his best method and he’s got it down so he won’t get caught.As it’s stated that anyone who even slightly messes up working for Maven they will be killed, not fired. And he’s already not making any money. He’s risking his life cause he’s going to lose it no matter what. And in finding this out I had a strong urge to save him and move him out of Riften.It just became a thing for my DB to love Romlyn and care for his well being. And it was almost impulsive as well. Maybe something about him lured me in but I couldn’t tell you now honestly but I can say that I’ve enjoyed learning hes a relative of Valen Dreth from Oblivion adn in ESO he has even more relatives. And It almost felt like fate when out of anyone my DB could of cared for, it was him.So I have a strong affinity for the Dreths. Can’t forget to mention! But My DB chose the imperials and took over Windhelm (if Im remembering this accurately since its been awhile since I’ve had that save) but he moves Romlyn to Windhelm after the war is over so he can hang out with his own kin since Whiterun its just, ugh. Crap. (so many Nords)I wanted to move him to Raven Rock but it wasn’t a way to do that even though you can get that one home? LOL. But I was kinda thankful too cause I didn’t want Romlyn where its all too hot and ashy. He seems adjusted to the cold and I believe him to have grown use to Skyrim that not even Windhelm will bother him. (Meanwhile Erandur is cursing the weather. LOL)Really would be nice if Romlyn was across the way from your characters and mine! That’d be adorable. Dunmer taking over the rich side of Windhelm is goals.

[imadeletingmysocials]

My scores for E3, because apparently now i’m a dumb 4channer who thinks this /v/ meme shit matters, like it’s not gonna affect sales or anything it’s pointless as all hell [this is lenghy, but hear me out ok]

EA: 

4/10 - people will probably play the games regardless of how shitty this presentation was but... It felt pretty insulting. 

Battlefield V is probably gonna make a lot of money regardless cuz people like war games and it seems pretty well done, the more footage they have shown seemed better than their weird advertizement that made world war 2 seem very wacky, which honestly regardless if you’re a sexist neckbeard or not, seemed like a poor advertizement move. 

TinyBuild:

No one watched this lol and it was just 1 GAME and a fun cute musical that made people who aren’t strong enough to musicals die, 6/10 because it made nerds die and their song is catchy, i dont really care about their 1 game.

Microsoft:

 9/10 - I'm giving this much of a high score because I would play practically almost all of these games showcased (they’ll probably be available on PC which I’m biased for cuz I have a gaming PC), no kidding, I pretty much liked everything I saw and it was fairly straight to the point. Many gamers don’t appreciate the finer details of each game and think they’re generic but that’s just fanboys who haven’t played a single game outside of their favorites. 

Also my cousin uses those Xbox One netflix rip offs that gives you games so i’m happy for him. The presentation had a lot of diamonds in the rough games that will I will probably appreciate more over time (they might even become cult classics like Metro or Dying Light) than any of other games at other e3s. As for the stuff I won’t be playing: It’s mostly harmless so eh.

There was an abundance of trailers! It was like one after the other, pure goodness, it seems as if they left out all of the Sports games to EA to present and the only thing they showed that might not be anyone’s cup of tea was “Forza”, but honestly? I appreciate it, it seems like a good racing game even if I’m not one to buy racing games.... But the more you think about the number of good games presented, the less you’ll think about that, I mean they showed DEVIL MAY CRY 5!!! 

...The Funko Pop game made me scream though.

Bethesda: 

8.5/10  I cannot deny that these are games I will want to play regardless if they’re good or not. Sad to see nerds not enjoy the opportunity to meet ANDREW W.K. but I’m glad all of the divisions they own are making sequels to stuff I already like, so pretty much Bethesda played it safe.

Devolver Digital:

 8/10 It’s like that one b-movie film your college students made and you had a laugh with creating.

Square Enix: 

5/10 seriously, 30 minues of just trailers? Most of which we saw?? I guess it could be worse but who uses E3 screentime for mostly MMORPG deals! The new stuff was too vague to be excited about too.

Ubisoft: 

7/10 - I liked it when they made funny quirky things and their games are probably gonna be okay like usual, Ubisoft has dedicated fans that like their collectathon games they release every year, and it’s usually that one game you play when you’re bored and got nothing else, it’s okay. 

Gamers hate fun and dancing and all that stuff but I kind of find stuff like that exciting, while nerds who never went outside and who are sensitive as all hell to any representation of fun find it “cringey”. A panda dabbed, and that settles it, Ubisoft was the only E3 Brave enough to dab this year. 

PC Game Conference (it was fairly long):

I know none of you watch this one cuz y’all fake as hell but listen... Fuck you LOL, these are the type of games people actually play over 400 hours and really get people’s money. Like these are games built to last that might be on the best-selling Steam front page for MONTHS, like how Frostpunk was comfirmed last year during this conference, PC Gaming has been known for sleeper hits that nobody knows about (because the attention goes to cinematic experiences on consoles most of the time) but suddently everyone’s playing it. 

PC gaming has always been an alternative lifestyle and seeing as many people didn’t watch this one, that just proves the point that it still relatively alternative. Maybe it’s because everyone sounds dumb as fuck when saying “PC GAMER MASTER RACE” and acting like an elitist. 

The PC Gaming conference is always more of a talk show than a regular E3 which is why I respect it every year, fuck the hyperactive gamers that just wanna see flashy trailers, this one’s more SOPHISTICATED!! It feels a lot more human and less artificial. Either way, lot’s of what you might’ve expected: Simulators and Survival games you’ll probably spend 3 years playing until they make a better minecraft clone. 

Gamers like to act as if they’re tired of Battle Royale (already? It’s a new fad it still is here to stay for a little more) but the numbers and success of it doesn’t lie that it isn’t a fad that proves itself to be highly tempting to try out for developers. Go cry to valve that they didn’t release Half-Life 3 cuz you haven’t played any other FPS game without even researching that Valve pretty much fired all of it’s developers and you’re just being annoying.

I feel as if I need to comment what I saw at this e3 cuz nobody watched, they made a mod I liked from skyrim into a fully-ass game, they’re rebooting Star Control which not a single gamer today knows of, the HP Lovecraft open world detective game also seems very good. YAKUZA IS COMING TO PC!!!!!!!!! Killing Floor 2 stuff, Road Redemption stuff, SHARK RPG, cute indie games, Jeff Goldblum was there, Wall-E with a gun in VR which seems to have promissing good vr design by Insomiac games (yes the spyro people), 2 games about Taxi driving... Like sure I think it’s a good format for story telling but.

A cell-shaded art game, star citizen is still being made, and it’s gone to the point nobody really wants it anymore even if it’s... Still being made you know? So most guys are wrong that it was gonna be canceled. After that was the technical graphic card stuff which gamers don’t have enough capability to understand, stuff like 9k laptops that SELL a lot mind you. Rich people love that technical stuff. 

A space defense sim game, Don’t Starve Sequel, Just Cause 4 detailed explanation of the engine, Overkill’s The Walking Dead gameplay which has been in development hell for years now now has a release date, I discovered Clementine’s voice actor is white... Go figure, a literal pixelated roguelike (not what you think it is, it’s Noita), 

Theme Hospital REBOOT!!!! YES!!!!!!!!! And the doctors were cute. Probably one of the funniest games presented... Followed by REALM ROYALE HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That harvest moon clone with a cute art style is still being made: Ooblets, no release date sadly. Anno is still going, cyanide and happiness still exists? and they’re making a battle royale? lol okay. How was Hitman 2 not announced during Square Enix?? Anyways it’s here at the end, the trailer was amazing and it’s coming out this year. 

I don’t have that much strong feelings because it’s just a normal conference and not a special one you know? But I’ll give it a 8/10 or 7/10 im not sure cuz I seem to like most games and I found Frankie cute.

Sony: 

Yo usually Sony makes like a huuuuuuuge thing about their conferences (like this year they didn’t even showcase indie games) but this year they started from a church for the sake of immersion?? It reminded me a little of their first E3s during the 90s, and it almost felt like a indie gathering for musicians, I swear to god, Sony is borderline experimental trying to balance out their E3 across stages. Jeb played the banjo and people just ACCEPTED it... AND THEN someone played some JAPANESE FLUTE? aRT. It might come off as a bit arrogant for some tho.

Nerds hated it and thought it was bizzare, which is why it means it’s good. HAPPY PRIDE MONTH BITCHES. Anyways could have been a little more fast-paced... But then again when it was fast-paced it was just like: Huh? What was that? I’m a big Resident Evil Fangirl, RE2 was my childhood but ignoring that for a sec: finally, Death Stranding gameplay, remins me of shadow of the colossus but post-apocalpytic, survival horrorish and abstract sci-fi.

 Kind of feels more Metal Gear than MGSV did already Cuz Norman Reedus sounds like snake a lot more than the 24 hours guy, and because from what I’ve seen in the footage, someone acts like Otacon to “Sam”. I think most now can figure out the plotpoints of this game with what has been established. I might be a bit sad at the fact that this will be a PS4 exclusive just like Metal Gear Solid 4, which I still haven’t played fully because it’s PS3 exclusive and I only have a gaming PC. 

Also this E3 was surprisingly entirely SINGLE PLAYER, I sorta don’t believe in the “single player doesn’t exist” myth honestly, especially now. I’m not sure if that makes Sony’s E3 better or worse, maybe it needed more variation, like I’ve commented, usually they have an indie showcase which this year did not. There were few games shown but for what it was worth, it’s still interesting... But yeah just 5 games? No Spyro? (easy picking), nothing extra? I can understand why many people felt this E3 was upsetting.

8/10.

Nintendo

Here it is, the most overhyped developer of all of E3, the source of “Nintendo wins E3 by doing nothing” memes because Nintendo fans really don’t care about anything except Nintendo and then act surprised when they only care about Nintendo when they try to be a little more open-minded (and fail) even if other E3s probably make more games built to last in comparisson, cuz we gay people only care about NINTENDO YOU KNOW? Shade asside... 

I was pleasantly surprised this E3, it wasn’t just a series of okay at best releases, a strong 9/10. 

tHAT WAS WHAT I WROTE IN PREPRATION....

BUT THEN???? IT WAS JUST THAT??? NO PRIME 4 NO ANYTHING LIKE JUST 3 GAMES BASICALLY? (maybe there was 5 games but eh) I mean smash is good.. It’s pretty much just an update of the last smash, every character is REALLY FUCKING GOOD BUT.... JUST THAT? jeez.. Like, the only stuff I wanted from it was Mario Party and Smash... Okay maybe that 1 Mecha game. Also I guess fornite is now on Switch but I can play that anywhere else really.

I guess a 7/10 is all I can give to just Smash, if there was a little more I’d give it a 9/10 for sure but... ehh Just Smash? jeez, fuck... i MEAN I kind of get it, Nintendo doesn’t do “e3″ normally, they usually do 1 big game at E3 and then wait a couple of months to do that little seasonal announcement thing they do across the year, ugh.. Okay. Yeah I guess i shouldn’t have expected much. Still isn’t it weird that Miyamoto was in Ubisoft’s E3 but not this one??? what!

Anyways

[strawbearyhoney]

Violet, Baby's Breath, Daisy, Lily, Lilac

i already did violet and lilac!

Baby’s breath: Do you like kids? If so, do you want to have any?

kids actually intimidate me,,, mother says i should be a kindergarten teacher, but those kids would walk all over me!!! id be like ‘pls take your seats’ and theyd be like ‘shut up bitch’ and id be like ‘okay sorry’ hhhhhh i cant discipline kids at all,,, i dont think i want any! 

even if i could discipline kids, ive just never wanted any, i was never even one to play with babydolls when i was little. i dont like responsibility. i got a Baby Alive doll and was stressed and tired of her within a week lol. also i can barely take care of myself how am i gonna take care of another living being? i dont even want pets cause i know im not responsible enough to take care of them properly. shrug emoji 

Daisy: What is something you find unique about yourself?

well, [LARGE TRUCK PASSES BY MAKING A LOT OF NOISE]

Lilly: Are you or were you ever religious?

my parents dragged me to church when i was little but i didn’t understand any of it, me n my sis sort of just played with our dolls and didnt pay attention, which is what most kids do i think. then they forced me to go to church camp and youth groups against my will which made me resent church even more and become determined to not be a christian lol. dont force your kids to share your religion, folks. they played themselves.

also theres the fact that [ANOTHER LARGE TRUCK PASSES BY MAKING A LOT OF NOISE] and if god were real and good he would never let that happen to a child. where was he when i needed him? lol

im not religious, i never was and i dont think i ever will be. i guess im also just uncomfortable with being controlled, of some omnipresent power controlling everything, because of [WOW ANOTHER TRUCK]. even when playing skyrim i couldnt finish the storyline of the thieves guild cause i didn’t wanna join the nightingales or whatever. i didnt want to sign my allegiance to anyone, i didn’t want to have to follow any rules, i didnt want to have anyone watching over my shoulder judging me and telling me what to do. i just wanna be my own free person. i just want to be alone.

maybe there is a god, maybe there isnt, maybe christains are right, maybe Jewish people are right, maybe Hindus are right, maybe some other religion is right. who knows? none of us do. a religion is, by definition, a belief. thats all. im not gonna be a part of any of it. let the chips fall where they may. 

thanks for asking!

[bostonchungschwa]

refresher for skyrim au:

all of them are dragonborn. does this make sense in-universe? no. do i care? no.

geoff is the most accidentally successful thief ever. you know when you play skyrim really sporadically and you come back after a few months and you can’t remember what you’re doing or who anyone is and then someone comes up to you like “you stole from this person, prepare to die!” and you have no fucking clue what they’re talking about? that’s just how geoff lives his life. he’s p high up in the thieves’ guild but he’s semi-retired in whiterun now. he still does any jobs they send him by courier, though.

at some point he picks up gavin, a descruction mage who’s very good with the fire spells. possibly too good. he’s a good pickpocket too and geoff ends up taking him in just so he won’t end up getting taken to jail by whiterun’s guards.

michael is a Companion, so he knows geoff and gavin just enough that any mention of gavin gets his eyebrow to twitching. when the three of them hear the greybeards’ call after killing Mirmulnir, he travels with the two of them just so they don’t get themselves killed. he isn’t attached at all, nope.

jack is one of the few remaining members of the dawnguard who are still loyal to it and everything it represents. he’s traveling through falkreath hold on a rumor of a vampire coven when he stumbles (quite literally) across ryan and a handful of guards in a tiny village trying to take down a dragon. after they manage to kill it, the two of them decide to travel to high hrothgar together.

ryan is a damn good member of the dark brotherhood. one of their finest, actually. he keeps it very quiet, of course, but the armor is a little bit of a giveaway. 

jeremy is? idk yet. im leaning toward thieves’ guild enforcer, the guy who goes and beats up the people who aren’t paying their dues, but he’s a damn good thief when he wants to be, even in the stupidly bright clothes he’s wearing. he’s also a trusted member of the brotherhood, because no one expects the guy wearing orange to be an assassin. it’s the perfect cover. the rest of the brotherhood hate that it works. the guild doesn’t know of his connections to the brotherhood, and vice versa, and he’d like to keep it that way, but ryan keeps calling him brother and geoff keeps calling him family and he’s sure they’re going to figure it out soon. 

[chiefdancingbear]

Simpernaturals: Baby Bear Arrives

Good Morning folks! Time for some more updates here!! Yes, I have been playing with this family A LOT, but I can’t help it! WAY too cute for words!! And if you are wondering, yes.....its my day off *dances*.......yes, I have kickboxing--WOO HOO!! And yeah, *grumbles* the dentist is in my future. BUT, I TOTALLY plan to play my games today. I think I might Skyrim to be honest cause yesterday I was actually getting somewhere. Anyway, I digress......let’s see what Gamer, Bear, and JB are up to!  

A couple more weeks passed by the household and it was as busy as ever. Bear, although she could choose to work from home if she really wanted to, had finally taken maternity leave. Gamer was so glad too because he had been wanting her to rest more now that the time was almost upon them. The doctor, upon the last visit, had told her to be careful and to make sure she stayed off her feet as much as humanly possible. She thought that her doctor was being overly cautious, but Gamer actually took her seriously. Sometimes, it really did annoy Bear. 

On one such occasion, Bear had been found cleaning up their room and Gamer stepped in. 

“Hon, what are you doing? You know the doc said it could be any day now and to stay off your feet” 

“Sweetie, you try living in a messy bedroom! This stuff has been around for Maker only knows how long! Its time that it gets picked up” 

“Alright, alright......you get off your feet and I will take care of it”

“That’s what you said a couple days ago and it was still not done” 

“Well, I DID have extra work from the office to do and the rest of the apartment needed cleaning as well....” 

“That’s besides the point” Bear said and kept picking things up and putting them away. Gamer went over to her and held her hands in his. 

“Im sorry.......look, go upstairs, rest, relax........watch a movie even. I have the time now and will finish up” 

Bear left him after a kiss and took his advice. She just was sitting down to a movie when JB came up to talk to her. 

“What’s up with Gamer?”

“What do you mean?”

“He’s grumbling......”

“Oh, that......I started to clean and--”

“Youre supposed to be off your feet young lady!!” JB scolded.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.........our room was a mess and I had to do something. I couldn’t rest in there.......”

“Gamer has been cleaning all week.......to keep YOU from doing it......”

“Exactly” 

“You mean you--?”

“Well how else was I going to get him to pitch in and help out?” 

“Bear, he DOES pull his own weight around here, you do know that” 

“True, he does and I love him.........its just that he had been promising for a while that he’d clean our room and he hadn’t done it” 

“You know, if it wasn’t for your sweet nature, you could totally pull off being a criminal mastermind?” JB joked and Bear smirked. “To be honest though, you could have relied on me too to help clean your room if you really needed it” 

“I know, its just that we all agreed that our own spaces were our own. That we could keep it the way we wanted to keep it, no matter what, as long as the rest of the place stayed neat and clean. And I knew, when we made that rule, that we all wouldn’t have a problem keeping our own personal spaces clean either which made it perfect. But why would I put my messes on you to clean up. That isn’t fair to you” 

“This is true......so, what are you doing?” 

“Gonna watch a movie, care to join me?”

“Got some work to do.......wish I could”

“You work too hard”

“Someone’s got to bring home the bacon” 

“Oh sure......rub it in the pregnant lady’s face why don’t ya?” Bear laughed.

“Oh don’t kid yourself........you work harder than anyone else I know. Both you and Gamer both. I gotta get to it though.” 

As JB left, Bear turned the movie on......

After the movie was over, Bear carefully made her way downstairs and sat on the couch. Gamer had been on the computer writing his column that was due in a day or two, but finally he had finished it. 

“Hey sweet cheeks, how are you feeling?”

“Tired......I am ready for this kid........I feel like a beached whale”

“Youre beautiful and you are definitely not a beached whale” Gamer laughed, sat down, and kissed his wife. “So, what do you want to do?” 

“Question is, what have you done?” Bear asked pointedly.

“Youre not going to give this up are you?”

“Nope” she giggled.

“Alright, smarty pants, come with me” he held out his hand for her to take it, helped her up, and walked with her to their room. Once inside, Bear was amazed. It not only looked organized but actually clean! 

“You are wonderful, you know that?”

“You forgot charming and romantic too.......”

“What’s romance got to do with---” Bear stopped mid-sentence as Gamer kissed her full on the lips, deep, and sensual. As they broke apart she spoke, “You little devil....” and kissed him back even deeper and longer. Soon, they ended up on the bed in the throes of passion. 

Meanwhile, unaware of what was going on downstairs, JB thought she deserved a work break to play some video games.

She was having too much fun trying to beat this new level in Skyrim. She had been through a lot with her companion on the journey, but another big fight was happening. Each time, she found out that she was dead within seconds. Still, it was the most fun she had all day and was bound and determined to get through it. 

Downstairs, after the passion played out and Gamer was collapsed beside Bear heaving from the exertion, Bear’s stomach finally growled loudly. Gamer laughed, “well, that’s one way to kill the romantic vibe” he joked. 

“Guess this little guy got his workout in.......” Bear laughed a little harder

“They aren’t the only one, wild woman” Gamer laughed with her, winked, and helped her up. “Lets go eat” he suggested. 

“Aren’t you tired?”

“Yeah, but it can wait......youre hungry and you need to have something to eat” Gamer led Bear to the table, sat her down, and got a plate for her and himself. 

As they ate, they chatted and it was mainly about names again. It had been a debate between Ben, Baer, and Bailey. Bear asked Gamer how he knew it was going to be a boy and Gamer smartly replied that he just could sense it. Truth of the matter was, he wanted a son so bad to carry out the family name. Not only that, but to have a son to pass things along to was something he always wanted. 

“Plus, Bailey works for a girl too........and if you think about it, so does Baer” 

“You’re ri-OUCH” Bear doubled over just as Gamer was stretching.

“What?! What’s wrong?” 

Before Bear could answer, she suddenly felt wet underneath her clothes, “I think my water just broke”. In an split second, Gamer was up out of his chair like the chair bit him. He ran to the phone and called the hospital and the doctor. JB, hearing the commotion came down and was suddenly aware and helped get Bear ready. 

In an instant, JB was waving goodbye and Bear and Gamer were on their way to the hospital. 

After being checked in, they brought her to the delivery room while Gamer filled out the paperwork. It took longer than usual for him to get back to the delivery room because he had to alert JB that they made it just in time. 

All Gamer could do was worry and the doctor had to calm him down. 

“Sir? She is going to be just fine.......its all okay!” she said. Turning back to her machine and then looking up, she addressed Bear now, “Okay, we need one more big push!” she said excitedly. As Bear gave it her all, in an instant, she heard the sweet cries of a baby. “Congratulations Mommy!! You have a bouncing baby boy!! What should we call him?” 

“Ben” Bear said breathlessly and without hesitation. 

“Ben......I like it! You were amazing honey!!” he beamed down at her. 

Gamer helped her up from where she was, helped get her dressed, and gave her some water. When she was able to stand on her feet, she went over to the bassinet and picked her son up for the very first time. It was a feeling like she never felt before. He was finally here! 

“Welcome my little angel!!” she said sweetly and cuddled him.

As she held him, the doctor came in with the certificate to sign. “Please make sure that his name IS correct on the birth certificate before you sign” 

Gamer poured over it to double check.....”Ben Trueheart.......that is correct!” he said and signed. 

The minute that the doctor left with the baby to make sure that all his vitals and everything was fine, Gamer came over to Bear. 

“I love you SO much!!” Gamer kissed her right then and there. It was one of the happiest days of their lives. 

Once apart, Bear mused, “From the feel of it, you want to start trying for another right now.....” she giggled as Gamer almost collapsed. 

“Let’s......let’s just wait this one out......at least until he gets older” he smiled and chuckled a little. 

“Chicken” she teased. 

“Is this a challenge?”

“Maybe” she smirked and gave him a longer kiss this time. Finally, the baby was ready and off they went to home. 

The minute that they were home and got settled, JB went and sneaked a look at the sleeping form in the bassinet and whispered, “Welcome to the world Ben.....you sweet angel”. Then turning to Bear, JB whispered again, “Bear.......he is perfect!” and Bear, in turn, gave her a hug. 

That’s it for now folks! Stay tuned for more and thanks for reading! 

[bonenkruid]

@fore-n-aft tagged me in this Get to know the blogger! thing a good month or two ago i think. i did the whole thing and then let it ferment in my drafts. so! here it is, i didnt forget u kc im just stupit <3

im not tagging anyone in this cuz im lazy. the thing is long so its under a cut.

FIRST NAME cillian STRANGE FACT ABOUT YOURSELF i get stressed out if i dont shave my head, change my bedsheets and clean my room on the same day. if i do one i have to do the others too. TOP THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU FIND ATTRACTIVE ON A PERSON gender nonconformity, strong hands, a unique fashion style A FOOD YOU COULD EAT FOREVER AND NOT GET BORED OF grilled cheese with diced jalapeños... A FOOD YOU HATE couscous. the texture is so incredibly cursed. GUILTY PLEASURE doctor who. but only seasons 1 thru 5. WHAT DO YOU SLEEP IN nothing. i cant sleep in clothes unless im too tired to care about being supremely uncomfortable SERIOUS RELATIONSHIPS OR FLINGS im not very good at long term relationships that arent platonic. dont like em IF YOU COULD GO BACK IN THE PAST AND CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOUR LIFE, WOULD YOU AND WHAT WOULD IT BE start playing an instrument earlier maybe? almost everything i would wanna change in some way shaped me into who i am so like. i wanna keep it the same ARE YOU AN AFFECTIONATE PERSON i love physical affection and i want to hug all my friends all the time. A MOVIE YOU COULD WATCH OVER AND OVER AGAIN the man from u.n.c.l.e. FAVORITE BOOK i can’t read. river of ink by paul m. m. cooper was great, and i liked six of crows. im currently reading the scottish boy by alex de campi, really liking that. YOU HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO KEEP ANY ANIMAL AS A PET, WHAT DO YOU CHOOSE id just get a horse i think? portable chair, big friend TOP FIVE FICTIONAL SHIPS no. PIE OR CAKE pie :) FAVORITE SCENT lavender, fresh linen, and petrichor CELEBRITY CRUSH g.. ger.. i cant even say it. gerard way IF YOU COULD TRAVEL ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD YOU GO i wanna go to ireland and sleep in a bog INTROVERT OR EXTROVERT introvert? i think? DO YOU SCARE EASILY ive been getting more jumpy lately, idk why IPHONE OR ANDROID android DO YOU PLAY ANY VIDEO GAMES yea, i love open world rpgs like assassins creed, skyrim, the witcher. lemme forget about modern life :( DREAM JOB capitalism is hell. i want to grow vegetables next to a little cottage. WHAT WOULD YOU DO WITH A MILLION DOLLARS buy a house, buy my friends things they want, book trips to go see all of my internet friends, and kc said donate to gofundmes which i 100% side with, especially now FICTIONAL CHARACTER YOU HATE i dont think i hate any character. if anything i hate how a character is treated in a fandom FANDOM THAT YOU WERE ONCE A PART OF BUT AREN’T ANY LONGER all of them? i just like mcr and nice paintings now.

[this-blog-should-not-exist]

It’s a blog for a reason

Idk if i’ll keep up with this actually or not but its a blog for a reason, they’re places were you can talk about whatever the fuck you want. I said Id do the same thing with my personal blog but also I follow some friends on that blog and they probably don't want to hear about the stuff I get up to or my little depressive episodes. I mean sure they’ll show their concern but that only goes so far I guess. 

Idk I mean it’s just a place for me to talk, I once started a google docs document where I had the idea to start writing like a guide? i guess you could call it but where I would write the name of someone I knew, one of my friends, a family member, ex boyfriends, whoever then I would create an entry of who they were, their interactions with me, my relationship with them and what I thought of them or their like defining character traits or actions that stood out to me. The benefit with this though I guess is that I can just type whatever comes to mind as i type it. Sometimes it could be organized and tie into older posts if I keep up with it or it could just be on the fly stories and recollections of thing that have happened to me or what I’m feeling at the time. Ive meant or at least had the idea to actually physically write this or start a journal where I could do the same thing but that would take me much longer to do where typing I can do much faster and get more thoughts out. Plus writing for so long and about so much makes my hand hurt after a while and I can’t talk about all I wanted to because I can't keep writing. I don't have that problem with typing XD

I guess I could start with some recent events that have been on my mind. So I guess about like 2 months ago? I had gotten a Tinder. That in itself was an event XD Ive always been both curious and scared of it because in my mind meeting someone on tinder doesn't feel as genuine when meeting someone by chance or passing or words between friends to meet someone new. But I had gotten one and within a few weeks I had made quite a few matches, however none of them seemed really into it. Half of them never messaged me back and only seemed to be there for the sake of getting a match, others may have talked back but didn't seem interested in trying to start something or meet up for a date. I had finally gotten one guy to go on a date with me, I had never really talked to him but Ive seen his face around because we had some friends within the same social group but like I said, never really met or talked to him only seen him on like instagram before. We had gone on one date and texted a bit but he just wasnt for me. I called him a “real flower child” is the best way I can describe it. Now I don't mean to offend anyone but also who the fuck is gonna read all this, this is only my first like text blog post no one really cares its more for me to get this out. Anyway I call him a real flower child because he's very outdoorsy and loves nature and Lana Del Ray and has the whole nose ring piercing, curly hair, circular glasses, he actually said once “the world make me sad” as he took a bath with candles and a bath bomb, he also said “wine makes me cry” which I mean ok maybe wine does make people drunk cry but still its all about his aesthetic. Its a fun aesthetic but that’s just not for me.

After him I had an occasional match but I ran into the same problem where either no one wanted to talk and was just there for a match or they never seemed interested. I had given up on the app really but I kept it around because in the back of my head I'm thinking like alright, its all good, I'm a patient person it just takes some time, you never know I may meet someone actually, and then last week I matched with two guys. One that lives on the other side of Columbus and one that lives just outside of Easton. The one on the other side of Columbus is really cute and had a lot of the same interests and is just kinda quirky and fun, I just haven't met him yet but we both want to meet up. Now the other one I’ll just say J, he lives outside of Easton and I went on my first date with him on Sunday. It was a good day, we had wandered around Easton, gone out to eat and saw a movie. He also has a lot of the same interests as me, video games, some anime, youtube, but thats about it actually now that I think about it. He's a little rough, like more aggressive but in a sarcastic way I guess. But we vibe well together i feel. Shorter than me, has contacts, wears glasses occasionally mostly at home really. He's 21 as well which I mean sure Im 19 but I guess thats where Im also attracted to him because he's a little older, he’s more mature than some of my past boyfriends but also has a childish side like me. Thats where we’re similar. We went and saw Mother! which I guess was supposed to be a phycological thriller but it was really dumb to us, it didn't make much sense. I was during the movie where I first kissed him, I had wanted to earlier as well but I didn’t feel like it was right yet. It made me laugh though that that was the movie we saw and decided ah yes, this is a good movie to kiss and cuddle and hold hands to. 

After the movie I didn't quite want to leave yet because I was getting pretty attached to him that night so we went back to his apartment for the night. I watched him play Skyrim for a bit, he let me try out Overwatch while him and his roommate had gone to get her some pizza. Which I thought like alrighty, this is okay, just leave me alone at your apartment even though I literally just physically met you today. They came back after like a half hour, eventually me and him went back to his room, we made out for a good while on and off. He wanted to take a bath together which I had never done before. My last boyfriend had suggested it but I never really wanted to much. We got the water running for a second but I was really anxious, I had gotten my shirt off but I didn't take off my pants. He was already in his underwear, it took me a second but eventually he also kinda forced me as in getting close and kissing me then pulling down my shorts and underwear. I was really awkward at that point. It took me like 2 months before my last boyfriend had seen me naked and no one before him has seen me naked, its just not my thing its weird, I just don't like it much. But anyway so we had gotten in the shower instead, I was still pretty anxious. My legs were shaking I was hugging my body, it was just generally uncomfortable but within a few minutes I had mostly gotten over it. It just make me feel really weird. After the shower we got out and just laid on his bed for a bit still naked. I had gotten over it by that time but there was still some after feelings that I guess I didn't notice as much since we were making out again. Eventually we but our underwear back on and a t shirt and went to bed after about another hour or so.

The next morning we just stayed in bed really until I had to leave to go back home because mom was wondering where I was, I had texted her last night that I was staying there with him so that was taken care of. Eventually I got home and that was that. He had actually invited me to a party one of his coworkers was having that night but I had already stayed with him one night and I had to but up early the next morning for work so I told him no I couldn't which of course he was pouting over a little but in a playful way that you would when your flirting with someone. So that night I actually ended up going to a party at my other friends house till like 1am but THAT was ok because he only lived like 5 minutes away from home compared to an hour that J lived. That was  Monday night, the first date was Sunday and I stayed with J Sunday night. I worked early on Thursday morning but then he came out to my house that afternoon. We played some Mario Kart Double Dash at my house then drove out to my friends house Ive been housesitting for to technically grab some wires for my Wii but then we ended up taking another bath in their huge bathtub with jets for about an hour and a half which was nice. I was used to being naked with J by now. We watched some youtube while in the bath, made out for a bit again. Then we got dressed and drove back to my house. By the time we got back it was about 1am when I wanted to get to bed because between Sunday and Monday night I had gotten about 8 hours of sleep total. So he left and that was Tuesday. Now yesterday, Wednesday I worked again early in the morning, then I went back out to Columbus and saw J again for a few hours, we played some gamecube again, I went with him to get groceries, then me and him went out to eat. Came back and laid in his bed in our underwear again watching youtube and cuddling and kissing until it was about 11:30 then I went home again. 

Idk what to make of J, I like him, he's the farthest Ive been on a first date thats for sure. I enjoy his company but do I? Or is it just because I haven't had any sort of attention like this in almost 6 months? Like I had said we share some similar interests. Video games, some music, a little bit of anime and legos. He's pretty sweet with me but also he's a little more aggressive than me, which I mean Im okay with kinda. challenge me a little, don't be afraid to playfully challenge and fight me. But don't be an ass about it. Idk theres the other kid on the other side of Columbus who I've been snap chatting as well but Ive been giving J most of my attention.