#knight!noah
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lolitasangel · 25 days ago
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Knight! Noah thought
AN- I know it's been a few days since I have written and i apologize as life has been taking a lot of different things as of lately (still sorting things out) so enjoy this cute thought/back story to Knight Noah, hope you enjoy<3
One day I will give a full in depth back story all the way leading up to Knight! Noah meeting reader.
TW= mentions of grief, death, loss, battles, over all fluff (if you feel I left anything out please let me know <3)
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Noah grew up a peasant, seen as less than by some of the richer townspeople. That didn't stop him from making his way up into being a knight. He didn't care what kind of knight, he just wanted respect and something to fight for.  
Growing up with the other kids around the village always seeing them play together as knights and soldiers he realized that was what he wanted to be. Although the other kids saw it as a game while they played, Noah saw it as 'practice before the real thing', to the kids he played it was just fun, but to him it was a way of living, of being. Finding something to fight for, whether the people of the town, the king and queen or the palace. He wanted to be the best knight; he wanted to be remembered for the things he's done, the lives he has saved, the lives he died for. 
When the battles between the other villages around the lands started to get fiercer and closer to home, the palace started looking and recruiting new soldiers, knights, etc. The opportunity popped up for Noah when he was just 18, now being 29, putting his life on the line, losing his closest and never giving up.   
Going into the military with brutal training, studying the ins and outs of the villages around him, studying on the history of the opposing villages so he knew what to look and hear for when going in. 
Due to this, overtime as Noah grew, he learned it was more than just fighting for your family, friends, etc. 
There was guilt, anger, confusion, agony, the emotions he began to feel over time became too much, he found it was ironic though. All this pain and guilt was not thought of when becoming a knight. Shutting off his emotions so he can't feel the pain and regret, he figured he could be like the other knights, instead of conversing with others he pushed away. 
The emotions, the people, the friends he made, he could not deal with losing anymore close people, it was better to not be attached at all so the loss was less painful, it never worked though, not with you at least. Noah never enjoyed taking lives or fighting, he just wanted something to fight for, as a kid though he never imagined having to take lives.   
The one thing that did stick with him through all the success, the accomplishments, the grief, the happiness, the loss, was his word. If Noah said he would get something done he would do it, if he said he would say something he would, he never broke that promise to himself. 
The time has come to be called upon the palace, knights and soldiers being called upon, making their way into the meeting grounds, standing outside the doors.  
Everybody stood in a single file line, standing tall, still and strong. There 10 total, the last remaining of the last war, all standing next to each other, ready for the picking. 
-----time skip <3----- 
Now that Noah has been tasked to be your personal knight his word meant more than ever, his actions ten times more calculated than before, sharper and precious blows to his training buddy. Noah held his oath to you very seriously, never breaking or tampering with your trust for and to him. 
If there was one thing you could trust Noah with especially with your life, it was his word. Both you and Noah were never vague on feelings, although Noah can be aloof as he takes this job seriously, continuous training, fixing his sword (or replacing it from some sort of 'issue' had to be handled). Noah would never make empty promises to you, if Noah said he was going to do something he was going to do it, even if it may seem like the impossible, that would not stop him. 
Now it had been a while since Noah was appointed as your Knight, the more time spent together was more time that Noah spent craving your touch. He promised himself he wouldn't feel this way or act upon it, but he craved your touch, he just wanted to feel you against himself or even just a sliver of your fingertips tracing his fingertips along your skin. You could not blame him though, you felt it too, when he would offer to brush your hair for you after you had spent hours inside of a meeting you did not have to be there for (Noah agreed that it was stupid for them to have you there when you could have been with him. He wouldn't tell you that though.) 
This night had been harsh on you. You had spent three hours studying the history of your village, the traditions held during the different seasons throughout the year, the rules as a now 'princess, one day queen' your family made sure to add the 'one day queen', which did not help your nerves and thoughts of having to lead a WHOLE VILLAGE.  Then cooking lessons from your mother, archery with your father and then horseback riding. 
You could not help but daydream most of the day, waiting till you and Noah can sneak around together through the night inside your bedroom, balcony, or your family garden.  
You tried to read your book while sitting at your desk and doing work, but you could not get him off your mind, eyes wandering outside the library inside the castle.  
Shelves covered head to toe with different books, so many people would kill to have these kinds of books, beautiful engraving, signed originals, the historians in the village longed to see the castle's private library and the treasures held. 
Not many people were ever in the library, just the bookkeepers, maids, servants on their break for the day. Sometimes if your father felt like you forgot something about a royal rule, he would have you in there all day asking questions about your family history, the village history, the celebrations, head valley was what you thought of it as sometimes.  
It was around 9:30 pm at night, you were waiting to hear a quiet knock upon your door, Noah told you before leaving you to your practices that "I will come back tonight for you, I always do." 
Well, that was at 6am, it was 9:30pm and Noah was nowhere in sight, you figured he may be running a bit behind because of him having to look over the new rookies. You could not help the anxiety and worries to fill your head; you knew that he was just helping them understand what to expect as all he was tasked to do was explain and show. 
"He better have not allowed any of those rookies to swing at him with that sword" you mumbled to yourself lost in thought. You were currently standing in front of your closet, you were ready to get changed and ready for bed, you hated doing it without Noah. 
It was your guy's thing, Noah would come at 9:30, he would help you get changed, help you with your hair and skincare (I don't care if this took place centuries ago, the skincare rule stays). 
You were lost in thought staring at one of the many dresses and gowns from your closet, your eyes landed on the first dress Noah ever took off you. 
The first time Noah had come into your room, he was petrified, he didn't want to be caught and fired or worse, executed for even being in her bedroom at night much less. You both had been close at that point, and you really needed someone, you needed him, nothing sexual either, you just needed him. 
Now it was different, every night he would come in and spend a few hours with you until he had to sneak back out a bit for when 'night checks' happened around the castle, he could not risk another knight, servant, etc. possibly catching him and saying something to the king and queen so they can get ahead. 
Hands came circling your waist, feeling yourself being pulled back into a sense of warmth, comfort, and sense. You blinked your thoughts away and came back out of your thoughts. Looking up, meeting the eyes of the man you pray to marry one day. 
Freckles sprinkled and kissed along his skin, you couldn't keep track of how many hours you spent either looking, tracing or kissing them. You stood on your tippy toes to reach for his lips, Noah met you halfway, pulling you as close as he could. 
Wrapping your arms tightly around his neck, never wanting to let him go, forgetting your problems as you laid in his arms, hearing his deep whispers in your ear of "It will be okay, my princess" or "don't worry, my love" and drifting off into sleep. 
"Late" you mumbled into his chest, still standing in front of the closet, feeling his hands slowly slip away from you, you felt Noah reach behind you to pull out a sleeping gown. "I know, my Lady, I'm sorry, but I am here" Noah softly explained to you. You both were aware of his time management, and he knew you would be worried if he was late, so he tried to be quick with the training, but this group was full of what would be called "village clowns" as they never took anything serious. 
Noah had slipped his armor off, some would think it would take a while to get on, but over time Noah became a master at slipping it on and off like a coat. Resting his helmet, sword, and gloves against your vanity, careful not to wear or scratch the wood and design. 
Noah came close to knocking them on their asses when he realized they would make him late, but he also was aware that if he did that it would take longer to get through the day to see you, so he ignored it for now. 
Noah led you to your vanity, pulling out the chair and gently pulling you to sit, grabbing the brush in one swift movement, starting from the bottom and working his way up in your hair to prevent anymore tangling, knots, or pulling. Noah was always extra light- handed with you, he was gentle and easy with you. The others would attest otherwise. 
They would say he is either distant, quiet, short and to the point, no patience for ignorance. Noah was one to be quick and to the point whether it hurt your feelings or not, it did not matter to him if he was not disturbed during his duties or interrupted during any sort of training or studying. 
Yes, those words were true as you have seen it yourself, but with you, that was a different story. Noah was patient with you, never rushing you, never cutting you off, never raising his voice, dismissing you, etc. 
You liked to call him your 'gentle knight' or 'gentle giant'; as he was a towering 6'3 you only called him that in private, you did not want other people calling him that, it was your thing and you did not want Noah even a little upset that people saw him as anything other than a 'true knight'. 
As Noah would brush your hair out, he would slowly gather it all in one hand and pull it behind your shoulders, bending down to place the brush down. In a swift motion leaving a light kiss against your neck and cheek. Redness slowly peeking up at the apples of your cheeks from the action, Noah was quiet, but not with his love for you. You still have the roses that Noah would 'borrow' from the flower shop just down the road from where you studied. Sometimes while you would make your way to your area to study you would see your favorite flowering lying quietly yet loudly on the table. Making a quiet but stern statement that someone was already interested so future suitors get the hint to not try anything. 
Noah reached down to your lap, grasping your hand gently pulling you from your seat. You stood up, hand in hand, Noah took your seat, looking up at you, getting lost in his forest brown eyes, his soft pout filled lips. 
Noah starts to wrap his hands around your waist, pulling you closer, resting his head softly against you, taking in breaths, not wanting to forget your touch, smell, kiss, everything. He wanted to remember everything about you. He was not sure if it was from the lack of you or the lack of being even near that was driving him crazy. 
“How was your day, my highness” Noah would mutter out, kissing the exposed parts of your arm from the sleeves of your robe. He loved to have skin to skin with you as much as he could, his attention focused on the way your hips fit just right in his hands, he loved holding you, and loved looking up at you. 
You could feel Noah taking deeper breaths and tightening his arms around you, was he afraid that he could blink, and you would be gone from his arms, you thought to yourself jokingly. Had you asked Noah that question out loud you knew he would just look at you and pull you closer, running his hands along your body, never wanting to forget the feeling of your skin against his rough hands. 
Noah loved to look up at you, he never cared if it was him bowing down to you, picking something up for you, etc. He loved the way the light around you would capture your essence, looking like his own guardian angel, turned love. Like you were his cupid, arrow shot to his heart, ironic since she does archery Noah thought to himself.  
Tonight was nice, the moonlight shining through the balcony window, the large dark wooden wardrobe in the corning reflecting the light in the mirror onto you, your eyes shined bright. Now Noah was a rational man and knew it was just the moonlight but he felt part of him having pride for the smile on your face though. And you would be stupid enough to deny, you loved to tease him like that.  
Thats what I want to protect that light, Noah thought to himself as he got lost in the sparks of your eyes as you spoke about your long day, you knew as soon as you felt him behind you, he was not in the mood for talking, he just wanted to get lost in you and your voice.  
Noah's hands started to slip into your robe, slowly pulling it off, he never looked at you, he always looked away or averted his eyes somewhere else, he would help you slip and button the dress up for you. 
Noah felt particularly quiet in words but not actions tonight, you knew if he had a long day, he didn't feel the energy to talk, and you understood, especially today, you both would be quiet for others but loud for each other. 
You pulled Noah from his seat, he was looking down at you, but his eyes were closed, he must have had a really rough day you thought to yourself. You run your fingers through his hair, feeling the strands slip through your fingertips. 
You guide Noah over to your bed, sitting at the end of it, legs dangling a little bit from the small platform underneath. This is the part where Noah gives you a kiss, a whispered comment and a look of longing painted on his face by the time he reaches the door. You knew he was quiet because of his throat possibly being sore from the shouting he had to do. 
You look up at him from where you sat, "I feel like you're extra quiet because those kids get messing around, and your throat is sore from shouting" you chuckled out looking up at him, your hands intertwined with one another. 
Noah let out an annoyed huff. "Yes, they never listen, and I'm sure they never will, they don't have what it takes to protect something important to you." Noah said firmly into the dimly lit room, keeping his attention towards the door, listening for any footsteps coming by, thinking of making his timing right without making a sound with his metal suit. 
Noah pulled his hands from yours, cupping your cheeks and pulling you in for one last kiss before leaving, although you both knew you were only outside the door and only a couple of feet away, it felt like miles.  
Every night was the same for you, curling up into a ball, thinking of Noah and what life you would live together had your parents known about your little relationship. You felt yourself smile at the thought of Noah standing next to you at your thrones.  
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I hope you enjoyed <3
Taglist <3- @veephoenix @bluestdai @fadingintothegrey @alwaysfightforwhoyouare
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veephoenix · 1 month ago
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VERONICA!!!
Knight! Noah who comes sneaks into your room while the guards aren’t paying attention just so he can sneak you a few snacks and can’t take his hands off you and just holds you as you eat, and you smack his hand away when he tries to steal one reasoning “I brought them though😐😒” 😭đŸ„ș
LOLA!!! 💕
You’re in your room one evening. It’s dark outside and you’re sitting by the fire in your room reading a book before going to bed when you get startled by a soft knock at the door. You’re not supposed to be disturbed at this time, much less by the man that reveals his face through the creak as he pushes the door open. 
“Noah?” You whisper, getting to your feet. “You’re not supposed to be here!”
But he’s already inside, closing the door behind him as quietly as possible. 
“I know,” he says. “But the guards were distracted, and I couldn’t wait until tomorrow.”
“Couldn’t wait for what?”
He holds up a small cloth bundle. His grin is boyish and proud. “Snacks.”
“You snuck into my room just to bring me food?”
But your eyes are lighting up as he kneels on the carpet and unwraps the bundle, revealing a collection of pastries, fruit, and chocolates. 
You practically melt to the floor in front of him. 
“I noticed you didn’t eat much today.” Your eyes make contact when he admits his constant attention and concerns for you. Then he shrugs. “It also gave me an excuse to see you.”
Your heart flutters. Your lips part, but you’re not sure what to say. Your blushing says enough. You reach for a pastry and take a bite. Before you can finish chewing, Noah’s fingers are tenderly brushing a stray strand of hair away from your face and tucking it behind your ear. 
“What are you doing?” you ask. 
“Your hair was in the way,” he simply says, but there’s a need in his eyes that you’re growing too familiar with. 
Trying to hide your reaction, you reach for a piece of chocolate and devour it eagerly. “It’s delicious. Thank you.”
Noah smiles at your gratitude, his chest full at your joy. 
“You’ve got—” he starts, leaning forward without thinking. You stop. Two seconds later, he’s brushing a chocolate crumb away from your bottom lip with his thumb, his touch lingering for just a moment too long. All you want to do is reach for him and get on his lap, let him give you all the attention he’s desperate to provide you with. But things are not that simple.
“Noah
”
“Sorry. I know."
You both try to focus on the snacks. When he reaches over and picks a strawberry from the bundle, you smack his hand lightly. 
“Hey!” He protests. “I brought them!”
“For me. That means I get to decide who eats them.”
He puts his hand over his heart. “You wound me, Your Highness. I braved the castle halls for you, and this is my reward?”
You’re smiling so hard at his mock-offense that you can barely process what you do next. You’re the one that leans forward this time, your lips meeting his. “There’s your reward.”
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theaxolotlkween · 2 months ago
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Noah: "Wow I can't believe White Knight would be offended by this"
Also Noah: *got that shirt custom printed for the sole purpose of offending White Knight*
Based on an earlier shitpost I made.
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newpartnerincrime · 4 months ago
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ER | S5E5, "Masquerade"
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dialoguestetatet · 1 year ago
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Windbreaker characters (separate)
Can you buy me pads
Takeda Kaneshiro; Noah Austin; Vinny Hong (Hong Yoo Bin); Deokbong Kim (Monster); Wooin; Shelly Scott; Gyuchan (Monster crew); June (Junsu Lee); Sangho Choi; Hyeok Gwon; Owen Knight; Minu Yoon; Ryohei; Sung Kwon; Hajun (Joker); Harry Shepherd; Dom Kang; Hwangyeon Choi
masterlist
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Why does it look like they're texting each other? 😭 I tried to include as many characters as possible đŸ˜„
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shintaru · 7 months ago
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Light Calvary | dating head canons
Sabbath, hummingbird, Kazuma, league of street, windbreaker
m.list ♡ taglist
Owen Knight ~
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Obsessed with you
Stalks you every corner you turn he will be there
You no longer have any alone time. Doesn’t matter if you’re sleeping, showering, shopping, cooking, driving, or walking he’s there
Would let you wear his clothes, he definitely sprays his cologne on it before giving it to you
Random hugs, if he feels affectionate prepare yourself you’re most likely not getting away from him đŸ€ŁđŸ€Ł
He’s very jealous, he doesn’t mind you hanging around the guys in his crew but if anyone had a crush on you or still has one he won’t like you hanging around them especially if it’s an ex
Overprotective, if you try to help give a random man directions somehow the guys head almost gets taken off
Will walk you home, probably never lets you walk anywhere by yourself especially at night
Sometimes you have to hide from him to get some alone time but expect him to spam call you
Would spoil you, whatever you want you’ll get it
Would know how to cheer you up when you’re sad and if he doesn’t know what to say he’ll stay by your side and offer cuddles
Wants to do his morning and night routine with you everyday you can’t miss a day or you’ll have to deal with him pouting until you make it up to him
Would have Harry & Noah watch you and report what you do back to him, if he’s unable to be there
Camilla Nelson ~
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She works a lot so she loves when you take interest in her work.
Will wear your clothes to bed.
Sprays her perfume on any gifts she gives you
Knows everything about you without you telling her
Would like restaurant dates but prefers to stay at home and relax with you
Would wear your clothes to bed
Helps you with your skin care and nutrition
Likes receiving roses
Likes giving you health advice
Extremely jealous but she won’t tell you how she feels at first she’ll make comments about it and you can tell she’s in a bad mood because she looks pissed off and she’s ignoring you
She’s a little controlling
She’s always busy with light Calvary crew
She doesn’t like when you don’t answer her calls or texts right away
Chris D’Char ~
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Would use sarcasm during an argument
You can’t go on restaurant dates, he eats everything and makes a mess as he eats. He also talks while he eats and crumbs fly out of his mouth.
He’s very loud, like too loud. If you get separated in a store you’ll hear him before you see him surprisingly since he’s huge. He will shout your name across the store making everyone stare.
Would try to share food with you but he’s definitely eating it all if you eat slow. If he finishes his food he might just eat yours too.
Would like seeing you in his clothes
Laughs extremely loud when you can’t reach something on a high shelf
Except a lot of physical touches, he doesn’t ask if he wants to touch you he’s going to. Ofc when it comes to nsfw he’d ask for consent but if he wants to hug you or place his arms around you he will just do it.
Loves going on dates that involve anything with food.
Would gift you jewelry sometimes it matches his
Likes spraying his cologne on clothes he lets you wear
Would want you to travel with him anywhere he goes
Would steal your hair clips
Likes when you cook for him, sometimes he’ll come up behind you wrapping his arms around your waist watching you cook for a little while.
Noah Austin ~
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Obsessed with you
She hasn’t had many kind people in her life so she’s really shocked when you show you care.
Follows you around sometimes
Probably always with you
Shares random snacks with you
She’s the jealous type, if you’re seen with anyone else other than the people she knows she will be jealous but she won’t say anything
Would gift you food
Doesn’t mind where the date location is. As long as she gets food and you both are hanging out
Would want you to watch her race
If you got into an argument and you want alone time away from her that’s just not going to happen she’ll follow you everywhere until you talk to her
Would steal your clothes
She’s also very loud especially in stores so like Chris if you two got separated except her to just shout across the store until she finds you
Very affectionate, likes holding your hands, cuddling, dragging you to random places that she wants to go
Harry Shepherd ~
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Shares chicken with you
Talks about doping 24/7 to the point you’d choke him if you could
Talks a lot about cyclist that inspired him
Would love seeing you in his clothes because he thinks it’s both cute and funny how huge his clothes are on you
Walks with you everywhere
You have to scold him because he always loses his wallet because he can’t stop taking off his hoodie when he races people
You have to accept the fact he will beat people up if they look at either one if you the wrong way, once he gets worked up there is no stopping him
Doesn’t like going on date night he prefers to order food and stay home
Loves laying on you so he can laugh when you can’t get up
Overprotective type, mostly because he likes having a reason to fight
If you’re mad at him he’d purposely put things on high shelves so you’ll ask for his help
I feel like he secretly would like cuddles but he would also end up crushing his partner by rolling over on them once he actually falls asleep and definitely hogs blankets.
He is a little insecure, so from time to time he will need reassurance
Dedications @rossesnd @cozyunderworld @catsrkool @owenskitten
I hope these head canons are good and not ooc😭😭 some characters I can write so much for cause I understand their character a little better but other characters I don’t understand as well or know enough yet to write the same amount
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slvttysstuff · 1 year ago
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Wanna be yours
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(Owen knight x reader)
Summary: you hated it when Owen got into fights you always nagged and scold him about it but what happened this time is new to you..
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I was sitting my ass in this hard chair for an hour now doing my school works, suddenly my attention got taken away from my works when my phone makes a 'ding' noise, someone texted me
I looked at my phone for a minute before taking it, I pressed the button turning it on revealing my lock screen a picture of me and Owen together, a small smile plastered over my lips as I saw the picture of the two of us
I unlocked my phone looking at the notification Noah sent a message I take a look at my messages it was noah, my friend and also Owens, what could she be sending me this time? I thought as I opened her message
' y/n! Owen got into a fight again, I don't know where he went He just left immediately ' noah texted,
my heart raced, I immediately put my phone on my desk and stood up from my seat not minding if I haven't finished my school works yet. Owen comes first I took my jacket and wore it putting my phone inside it's pocket before leaving my apartment with my own bike with me
I rode off letting my feet pedal where it's taking me, Me and Owen had been friends since elementary, he was a very good friend of mine, he makes me smile, laugh and everything, but one thing I hate about him is when he gets into fights, any kind of fight that involves him, I hate it, Owen is not a short tempered guy but once his red button has been clicked
may God be with you
It was already night, at 9pm sharp the sky was already dark and the street lights illuminated the street, it was quiet, suddenly I stopped my bike when I saw a familiar blonde haired figure sitting in a bench his head was fall down in his hands holding it, I walked towards that person I already knew who it was, without hesitation I smacked his head making him jolt in shock and also in pain
Owen looks at me pain wais visible on his looks, bruise was all over his face making me feel bad for smacking him earlier if I could go back in time I would definitely repeat that...
"Did you get into another fight again?" I asked even though it was completely obvious, but he just looks at me for a second
" Wasn't it obvious? " He sarcastically said I was about to open my mouth and start scolding him when he spoke
"Can you please stop scolding me?" He said as if he already knew what I was going to say, He raises an eyebrow, but remains calm and direct with you, despite his rage over what happened after he lost the race earlier against Jay, his words makes me close my mouth
" what happened this time Owen? " I asked looking at him worried " nothing.." he answered looking away from me then looking down at his bruised fists" How many times do I have to tell you that stop getting into fight- "
" Enough, I told you to stop scolding me " he cut my sentence once again, I scoffed at his attitude and words
" how can I not scold you? You always got into fights" I spoke putting both hands on my waist looking at him " how many times do I have to tell you to stop getting into fights owen!"He rolls his eyes as you continue to scold him
you sometimes feel guilty for nagging him, but he's just so hard headed, even though he seems to ignore it
"What am I supposed to do?" He sighs "Just stand back and allow Jay to do whatever he wants? I can't just let him." He continues
" why do you have to fight? You can talk with him about it Owen, you don't need to fight with someone every time, don't you understand what I am saying? " I frustratedly said to him, looking down at him as he was sitting on the bench
I pulled his chin making him look up at me " look! You're all bruised up again " I nagged
"Oh please, don't be so dramatic. It doesn't hurt that bad, plus it's not the first time." He raises his eyebrows and looks at you sarcastically. He thinks you're joking right now "I'm used to fighting, you should know that by now." He continues
I looked hardly at him before letting go of his chin huffing at the air, gosh his head is hard as rock I put my hands back on my waist turning around not knowing what else to say, He won't listen to me
" can't you listen to me for once? I've been scolding and telling you 'bout this since we were kids " I muttered to him glancing at his side view
Owen scoffs at my words before he shakes his head. "You're still scolding me till this day. Haven't you done enough?" He sighs and looks at you with a serious face.
"Look, I appreciate you for worrying about me, but you're being overprotective. Let me handle my business." He hissed before looking away His words sent me to the edge of my temper
" I'm your god damn friend Owen and I care that's why I worry about you! " I yelled at him, gritting my teeth as I feel frustrated and annoyed about what was happening right now
Owen rolls his eyes at me "You're still treating me like I'm a kid. It's different now. I can handle it myself! I don't need you to tell me what to do! Mind your own business damn it!!" He raises his voice emphasizing each words
His words shots a million bullet in my heart
' I don't need you to tell me what to do '
' I can handle it myself '
I got hurt at what he said I feel like he's saying that he doesn't need me anymore, I put both of my hands inside my pocket, I looked up trying not to let my tears fall down, luckily it's night time and he can't see it, how can he say those words easily? How do he expect me to react at his words? Should I laugh?
" y-yeah you're right..." I looked down at my feet as I let out a fake laugh " you're not a kid anymore...you can handle yourself already haha..." I bit my lip trying not to let out a sob " okay fine..." I said " I'll just go home, I don't know why I am here anyways " I said as I pointed at my back, looked at him first before turning my back at him taking my bike with me
Owen immediately notices how you changed in a second. He knew that look when you were struggling to keep it together so he quickly stood up and went to you. He knows that he's wrong and he immediately felt guilty,He gently grabs your shoulders and turns you around so you can look at him in the eyes.
"Hey, I didn't mean it like that. Don't take it personally." Owen sighs, it wasn't like him to be rude and insensitive to you, he just got carried away by his emotions and he hated it every time his emotions take over him, he doesn't like hurting you, how can he hurt someone he love? He loves more than friends
I just scoffed at him not looking at him, a tear left my eyes making me wipe my cheeks with my sleeve
Owen sighs, he hates it when he makes you sad. Seeing you hurt hurts him also
"Hey..." He gently caress your cheek and pulls you closer in front of him, so you can make an eye contact with him. "Look at me." He said, I do as what he told me to, I looked at his baby blue eyes those orbs that left me speechless and mesmerized " you speak as if you don't need me anymore, like I was just a mere distraction to you " I spoke as a tear left my eyes
Owen's heart sinks as soon as he heard you say those words. He immediately wraps his arms around you and pulls you in tightly on his chest."Stop that, you're always going to be important to me. I'm sorry if what I said had hurt you." He said as he wiped your tears with his fingers.
"I'll never act like that again, I promise. You're so important to me how can you be a distraction? You're the one person I always seek comfort from you're too important for me to lose." He said as he gently strokes your hair,he felt guilty for acting like that he doesn't like what he did to you, I rested my head on his shoulder as I let out a quiet sob
" I hate you so much Owen " I sob as I grip his shirt " I hate you for making me worry about you all the time " I cried
Owen chuckles slightly because of how you're expressing your feelings while crying on his shoulder. He smiles, he finds it so adorable and charming to see you so emotional towards him. He hugs you a bit tighter and strokes your hair again.
"I'm sorry, you might hate me right now, but that will never change the fact that you're always going to be an important person to me. I'll make it up to you. Just forgive me." He whispered to my ears his hot breath hitting my ears his gesture makes my heart beat so fast and the closeness we had he might notice my heart so fast
" do you know how worried I am?earlier when noah texted me that you got into a fight with jay again?! " I yelled " I don't want you getting hurt Owen " I punched his chest slightly " why are you so stubborn? " I mumbled
Owen couldn't help but feel guilt and regret for making you worry about him so many times. The way you're crying into his chest and begging him not to get hurt anymore makes him feel like he's the worst person you ever had.
He sighs and shakes his head, wishing that he hadn't said what he said earlier.
"I'm sorry, I'll promise you I won't fight anyone anymore." He said as he looks at you with his blue eyes that look so irresistible under the night sky I looked back at him, looking at his wounds " damn you Owen! You always know how to make me soft towards you " I said as I bit my lip looking at him
Once again, he couldn't help but chuckle when you were being so cute and sweet towards him. You were very vulnerable and emotional right now and that's what he really loves about you.
"I'm a bit stubborn, but I really mean it." He smiled and leans closer to your lips. He gently grabs your chin and turns you toward him.
My heart started to run like crazy, out face are so close to each other, I looked deeply in his baby blue eyes noticing the affection it was in, this time I'm already sure that owen does feel the same as I am
I felt my cheeks heated up as I looked at him with my red eyes and red cheeks, I feel embarrassed fuck
Owen couldn't care less how red your eyes are, in fact he loved it because it makes you look irresistible to him. A grin appears on his face as he gets closer and caress your cheeks slowly with his hands. He brushes your jawline and chin with his fingers. You can feel his touch as it sends shivers up and down your spine.
His breathing is heavy and he leans closer and he's almost inches away from your lips.
" God damn it Owen " I hissed
then pulled his face to me as our lips crashed into each other, it was obvious that he was shocked at what I did but didn't mind it was also his plan in the first place, he wrapped his left arms on your waist pulling you close to while his right find it's way to you cheeks, his lips started to move and you did the same, you both kissed under the moonlight, he kissed you passionately with full of love
After a second he pulled away catching an air, he layed Hindi forehead on yours as your eyes were still close, I hope this isn't a dream
" Y/n....I like you "
Owen finally said, making you look at him, a smile went on your lips
" I like you too Owen.."
I confessed back, same as mine, Owen smiled as he cupped both of my cheeks before placing a light peck on my lips
" That's good to hear then.. I've been wanting to tell it to you..." He said closing his eyes before saying..
" wanna be mine y/n? "
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erisawrites · 2 months ago
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Video credits @/wooh.hy on tiktok
SQUID GAME WINDBREAKER AU WHENNNNN????
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bluegirl-something · 19 days ago
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THE PROVIDENCE
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Don't mind me add Noah cuz idc-
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addictedtostorytelling · 1 year ago
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the (approximate) timeline for episodes 06x13 "be still my heart" and 06x14 "all in the family"
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cozyunderworld · 10 months ago
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My new addiction
Chris 🧡🧡🧡 Last Light Cavalry Member đŸ”„
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I have no words to describe this fine as dude. đŸ˜«đŸ˜«đŸ˜« my new fav 🙈 also looks like a more evil Vinny 😂
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lolitasangel · 16 days ago
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Knight Noah x F reader Valentines day special
An- Hi my demons and angels! I hope you all have a great weekend/valentines day! I wrote this cute little special last night so I'm sorry if there are some misspells. I also wanted to recommend @veephoenix samurai Noah fanfic THE UNMAKING OF A WARRIOR, incredible writing/writer, incredible sweet, i love them so much, so please go check them out! <3 Also my asks are open if anyone wants to speak about Knight! Noah or anything they are open
TW- NONE ALL FLUFF
Taglist- @fadingintothegrey @veephoenix @bluestdai @alwaysfightforwhoyouare @silent-stories @somebodyels3 @thenmaybehellaintsobadafterall (tagged everyone who i thought might enjoy this, love you all <3)
word count- 5,000
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While Noah spent the night patrolling the palace tonight, your family had to take a carriage down to an allied village to discuss the annual ball. Every year your parents would host a small festival to celebrate the love the village had for each other.  
The King and Queen loved to come down and see all the kids playing, workers selling their best products, meeting newcomers who may have stopped by during their travels. It was not unusual for them to go and speak with them, inviting them down to celebrate, it was also a good time to speak of any pending issues, threats, etc. towards the villages and allied villages.   
Noah could not sleep and decided he would walk around the village even if everyone was asleep and all the shops were closed. This was the first valentine's day you would have together as a couple, he was worried about what he should get you, he was sure to figure it out, but he couldn't shake the little anxiety he had. Noah wanted to make it as romantic as possible, as sweet as sugar, and as bright as the sun at dusk.  
He took account of all the red and pink decor hanging from the shops around the village. Valentine's day was approaching soon, Noah took his time looking at the vendor's made hearts twirling in the air as they hung in place.   
The fruit stands had their annual Valentine's Day and had some heart shaped fruit laid on small plates for buyers, husbands, wives, kids, etc. to buy for their loved ones. The bakers had their heart shaped bread, cute couple pastries, small cupcakes with little heart icing in pink, red, white accents.   
As Noah took his time making his way back to the palace back into his room, he made sure to look for anything out of the ordinary, even outside of his suit he still stood by his sworn oath, one of the many things that made you fall in love with him. He quietly snuck into his room, laying back down in his tousled sheets from the twisting and turning done.   
—Day of the Festival  
The festival has officially started, kids running around playing, parents talking amongst each other, shops setting up the rest of their stations, the air smelled of the best food, fruits, and deserts.   
Noah was once again standing at his station, quiet and reserved as usual. Noah was not in his usual all medal knight suit, he was wearing the finest of clothes, paired with gauntlets, a scabbard to hold his sword, and a hauberk.  
Every once in a while Noah's eyes would linger over you, speaking with young girls, answering their questions “can I be a princess one day?” and “do you get to wear the fat dresses”, you had smiled at all the questions, seeing the little girls eyes filled with hopes and dreams, you didn’t want to crush them either so, you tried your best to answer them “you all are already princess of your family, honey, to be a princess is to be kind hearted, strong, and determined, fight for the weak, and lead the strong and the fat dresses” you started, referring to the little girl named ‘Lindsay’ “they are ball gowns, silly girl” you teased, booping her tiny nose, causing a giggle,  “and they are very hot” you had chuckled out. The more the girls asked questions and the more you answered made Noah's heart swell up.   
He wondered if you ever wanted kids, he knew the palace would want one, but he wondered what you wanted. If you would want kids, if you want to marry, let alone all that with him. He wouldn't mind starting a life with you, whether it be in the palace or outside.   
The festival was bustling around with people, as Noah ended his shift from his watch he went to go find you, it was a good reason he was your knight so it wouldn't be suspicious to be with you or pop out of nowhere, which is what he did.   
Your mother and father let you have the rest of the day to yourself, relaxing alone in your room. You had changed and laid spread out on the bed, exhausted from the traveling, talking, noise, you just wanted peace and quiet now.   
You were startled when you felt a hand softly caress your cheek, ripping your eyes open you see Noah towering over you, cheeky smile on his face, different from his usual stoic face he held. You relaxed back into your spot, grasping his hand, placing a small kiss on his hand “Long day?’ you pondered out to him.   
“Yes, but not as long as yours I bet” Noah chuckled out, you let out a soft hm, you had missed him all day, you saw him briefly when leaving the palace. You had at least wanted to give him his gift. You were so excited for him to see it but was met with disappointment when it was your mother walking through the door with a big dress explaining once again today's plans.  
Noah pulled off his hauberk and laid it down on your chair along with his sword. He walked back over to you, laying down and pulling you close “happy Valentine’s Day, my lady” he mumbled into your neck, presenting a small little trinket box, it was adorable, it presented a small knight and princess on top of a small hill, the knight kneeling before his princess, hands clasped together, it looked like he was professing his love.  
“Looks like us” you teased, you both didn’t need to speak too much to understand each other “I love it, it’s beautiful, where did you get it” you asked, you twirled it around in your hand, looking at all the detail and engraving done.  
“I had it made, I asked the blacksmith if he could pull some strings for me” Noah replied, pulling his face away from your neck, resting his head on your shoulder.  
Before you could say anything “don’t worry, he won’t say anything, he’s been a longtime friend of mine” that’s when you realized he was talking about Nick, you knew he had a friend named Nick who did black smithing you just didn’t put two and two together.  
Before you could put it down, Noah reached up and pulled it apart, opening it displaying a necklace, with both of your birthstones, he didn’t say anything, he didn’t know what to say really.  
Noah was aware that the trinket box was enough, and that he didn’t need to do any bigger, but he wanted you to know that he really loved you and wanted to be with you, even if it ‘just a necklace’ to others, no one would know the meaning except you. 
You both sat up in the bed, you pulled your hair to the front giving Noah room to clasp the necklace and lay it against your skin. He placed a peck at the nape of your neck, pulling you into his chest, wrapping his arms around your waist. 
“It’s my turn” you said, smiling brightly, Noah was a little confused, he didn’t expect you to gift him anything, he would be fine if you just spent the day with him. 
“So, while we were out, one of the many days I was done” you joked, as you made your way over to your wardrobe, “I asked my mother something” you continued on, being very vague.  
“I asked her if she would ever let me be with a knight” you said as you opened up your wardrobe, pulling the doors apart and pushing your clothes to the side. 
Before you touched or did anything else you turned back around, facing him and giving him your full undivided attention.  
By the mention of your mother and possibly being with a knight Noah’s ears perked up, heart starting to race. He was worried of how this story might turn out.  
He tried to keep his cool and not show any worry or dismay on his face, but this was something serious. This was his job on the line, his life even, had they known he was ‘messing’ around with their daughter he would be executed.  
“Go on” Noah replied quietly. You started to make your way over to him, resting your hands on his shoulders, standing between his legs as he sat at the edge of your bed. 
“Well, I asked her that question, and she asked about you” you said picking at the small fuzz balls on his shirt, you knew the way your were speaking was making him nervous but you couldn’t say it, you couldn’t even believe it. 
“Well, what did she say about me, was it bad” Noah asked out quickly, he brought his hands up to your waist, wanting to hold on to you, hold on to some sort of hope.  
“She said that she knows about us, she’s known since before we have ever known” you chuckled out, thinking of the conversation you had with her. 
——— 
“Sweety, I’ve always known, I’ve known since he knelt down and sworn to protect you, I’ve known since your little cheeks would get flustered anytime he stood next to you” your mother teased as she was fixing your hair sitting in front of her vanity.  
“So you aren’t mad” you ask, looking up at her through the mirror, you were never really scared of her reaction though, it was more of what she thought, if she thought is was a bad idea, a risky one. 
“I would be mad if you didn’t” she stated as a matter of fact, “how do you think I met your father” she said smiling and winking at you through the mirror before leaving.  
Before you could ask what she meant she had left, your father was the prince of palace growing up, you knew that, but you never really thought to ask how your parents came to be.  
They both have always said that they met at the ball, you just assumed she was a princess from some far away land that came by and met.  
You got up from your seat and raced out the room, looking for your mom every which way, asking different maids, chefs, knights, soldiers.  
You finally found her in the garden, the garden was always important to mom, every year for Valentine’s Day your parents would spend the rest of the evening in that garden. 
It was huge, with a pond in the center, flowers planted in specific places around to give a beautiful scenery from near and far. Your father was always strict on it being kept up. Which was a little out of the ordinary, your father was always strict with the knights and soldiers but he was never strict on things like a garden.  
“Your father and I met because I snuck into the palace” your mother chuckled out, twirling a flower she had plucked from the bushes, a beautiful blue lily “dads gonna be mad that you plucked that, you know how he is about the garden, mom” you say with a quiet scold in your voice.  
“Dads the one who built the garden for me, I think I can get away with it” your mothered said, planting the flower behind your ear. “Dad told me that the garden was hear since the beginning of our village” you replied back as fact, dad spent hours and hours every year speaking of how important it was. 
You figured it was important because flowers were associated with love and Valentine’s Day, one of the biggest days of the town. Everyone coming together to share their love and care for each other, whether it be loves, friends, family, it was another way of uniting the village, a reminder that we are all here together. 
“Oh honey, I was a rambunctious little thing, I made your father build that garden as proof of our love, he swore to me, “if this garden is still around by the time I become king, I will marry you here” oh how he was such a romantic” you could hear the reading in her voice, a smile being brought to your face, you didn’t see your dad as a romantic, maybe a little goofy but not a romantic like that”  
“Well” you said, the word drifting in the air, the sun was starting to set and you both had to head back in for dinner and to turn in for the night, but you wanted to hear more, how, how did she make him do that, how did she get in, what did she do” 
Your mother turned her head to you, away from the pond, “he did, he proposed with the clan ring, and he professed his love for me in front of everyone, your grandmother was furious” she said, she started to laugh out loud from the memory of the wedding.  
“Wait I thought you and dad got married in the ball room, grandma told me you guys got married in the ball room and met when you came down for a ball and that’s why you married in the ball room” you exclaimed, “has my life been a lie?” You asked jokingly not joking.  
“No silly, your grandma said that, so you didn’t have any silly ideas, like eating a flower” she said ruling your hair behind your ear. “If this is about Noah, your father and approve, we were just waiting till you told us "She said, a delicate smile on her face, you could see and hear the sincerity through her eyes and voice.  
“But wait, why was grandma upset? You said she was furious, was it because he was marrying someone who broke in? And why did you break in?” You asked, you had so many questions and since your parents have been speaking of marriage as of last, you deserved some answers.  
“She was upset because she had been begging for years to have a garden, she would not let your grandfather hear the end of it, keep in mind, your grandfather wasn’t aware of your father doing such a thing” you both started to laugh harder at the thought of your grandmother and grandfather arguing about something he had no clue of. 
“Your grandma was standing there talking his ear off “how long have I wanted a garden?” And “I’ve been saying for years I’ve wanted a garden in the palace grounds”, she would have been proud that you found your love though, you know that honey” your mother says solemnly, you and your grandmother were close growing up, you missed her a lot. 
“Speaking of which, I know you didn’t get him a gift” she says side eyeing you “I haven’t had time, I’ve been trying to figure something out without getting caught” you say covering your face and groaning out.  
Your mother chuckled as she started to stand up from the rocks surrounding the pond, reaching down grasping your hand to bring you up as well. 
“Come on, I know what you should gift him” she says, as she leads the way back to the palace.  
You both stood inside of your mothers bedroom, you sat down on her bed waiting patiently as she opened the trunk at the end of her bed, “your father and I have kept track of and how much he has helped this village.” She started, bringing out a long metal case.  
“He’s trained knights, soldiers, he answers the kids in the town and encourages them to fight for their family and loved ones. He’s stepped up to help your father when he was sick, traveling miles and miles to find the best herbs for us, studying its properties.” She continues as she clicked the locks out of place, bring out a long, sharp and beautiful sword.  
The sword stood a good 4 feet long, the handle made out of gold, the gaurd of the sword presented two emerald dragons protruding out, in a fighting stance, mouths open, ready for battle.  
The blade itself, engraved beautiful flowers from the base turning and growing into sharp vines, it was beautiful. Your mouth had fallen open from its beauty. 
“Your father and I had this made for him, he is a true knight, and I hope one day a true king” she says quietly, she quietly took the sword from your hands, slipping it back into its case.  
“We don’t want him to think he has to be king, after all you both have time to think of what you want to do with your lives but, if this continues I would want him to have the best sword” she says, “come, we are late for dinner” she says, taking the case with her to put in your room on the way out. 
—— 
You walked away from Noah reaching back into your wardrobe, Noah could hear your clicking something out of place, “I had someone come and put this away for me so you couldn’t see or find it by mistake” you say, turning around you hold up a new sword.  
Noah’s eyes widened, mouth fallen open, “that’s not mine” he says, shock dripping from the words coming from him.  
“My mom and I when we were talking, she said that she you deserved a better sword for a true knight” you said. Noah had spoken many times of having to fix his sword constantly and need to make a new one but he didn’t want you to have to go out of your way to give him one, let alone your mother. 
You laid the case into Noah’s lap, taking a seat next to him on your bed, placing a hand on his back “open it” you whispered softly in his ear.  
Noah’s hands were shaking a bit, that was a lot of info to take, but he was excited and relieved that they knew but that changed so much. 
Does he still have to sneak in? Is he still her personal knight? He has so many questions but that could wait, he was with you right now and that’s all that mattered. 
Noah took the sword out of its case, letting out a large gasp, standing up immediately, grabbing the case quickly and sitting it on the bed.  
He started to swing the sword a little bit, trying to get the feel and weight of it, it was beautiful, he would go between swinging it to looking at a new design he missed the first time. 
You loved seeing him like that, his natural element, something he was passionate about, he was so grateful and happy but also shocked. 
He decided to put the sword away, before saying a quiet thank you to it for allowing him to use it for its potential. 
You loved how Noah showed respect towards the sword, you thought it was sweet that he would give his thanks to a sword for helping him fight and train now and in the future.  
He pulled you up from the bed giving you a kiss to your lips. Wrapping his arms around your waist, burying his face into your neck, breathing in your scent. “Thank you, my love, my queen, my princess, my lady” he said through kisses.  
“I don’t know how to repay you, I can’t thank you and your parents enough, thank you for allowing me to love you” he said placing a kiss on your hair, “you don’t know how much this means to me” he said, you pulled away from him looking up at him, “you can thank them tomorrow, for the rest of the day though you’re mine” you say smiling up at him.  
Noah’s smile was big and filled with joy, leaning down to give you another kiss, “I don’t mind doing that, my queen” he states. 
You move the case over to your vanity, laying it across that top. You walked back over to Noah pulling him into bed, spending the rest of the day laying in bed and speaking. You both got comfortable and continued to speak for the rest of the day. 
Tangled in the sheets and cuddles up together. Noah’s fingers were tangled in your hair as you were laying on your stomach, arms holding you up as you spoke to him, you were speaking to him about the little girl named Lindsay.  
“She said “fat dresses”, she’s too adorable” you chuckled out, laying your head back on his chest, “I overheard, my lady it was very funny, you would make a good queen” he says to you. You both spoken about being the queen and how you were nervous at the thought of having to lead a whole village and guide them.  
Noah was always there to ground you with your thoughts though, always countering one anxious thought with a soothing statement. And you always did the same, it was always a two-way street, you would take care of each other, look out for each other, you were like a team.  
“You would make an incredible King” you said, you both have never really spoken about him being king but you both knew the odds of dating and getting married would make him king.  
“You think?” Noah asked letting a out a chuckle, reaching over for the cup of water taking a sip before turning back over to you, “yea, you’re strong, you have trained most of the best knights and soldiers around here, you are great with kids” you say all as a fact. 
“Thank you, my love, I would be honored to rule the kingdoms with you and steal your strawberry pastries from you again and again” he joked out causing you to laugh out, “you’re such a goofball” you say pushing him softly on his shoulder.  
“Speaking of strawberry pastries, I’m not going to give you the strawberry pastry I bought” you say teasing.  
There were three things Noah didn’t play about. 
You. 
The Kingdom. 
His strawberry pastries. 
“What” he says sitting up, full attention and jokes out his voice. “What strawberry pastry” he asks, lip pouting out a bit. 
You loved joking with him about not getting his treat, you always snuck one away from the bakers in the palace, you knew he loved those sweet little treats.  
“While I was at the Bakers I actually had them make a batch of strawberry pastries” you say shrugging your shoulders trying to hold in your laugh.  
As you turned away from your wardrobe pulling out a pair of pajamas for you and Noah, your mother made a point to give Noah extra pajamas for if ever decided to start sleeping in your room with you.  
Your mother and father trusted you both not to do anything rambunctious but also knew that if anyone tried to do harm to you would be met with a furious knight and his two hungry dragons sitting on the handle of the sword. 
“Remember when I saved you from that bee” his statement and pout lips poking out made you crack. Bursting out laughing you made your way over to your bed where he still layed, tossing the pajamas to the side. 
“Out of all the things, out of all the things you have saved, helped, and volunteered to help, you choose the one time I was dealing with a bee” you continued to cackle out. 
You felt Noah nudging you, trying to get your attention “hey, hey, this is about the pastries, stay on topic” he says as a fact.  
You turned over, facing up at him, you reach up, and tug him down for one more kiss, considering his attention will now go to the pastries.  
You open the door and ask a servant walking by if they can run by the kitchen and ask the baker for the pastries she had set up so they wouldn’t go bad or get eaten by Noah as soon as he sees them.  
“Are they back yet?” Noah perks up, you turned back around pulling him up from the bed, grabbing the pajamas, chuckling “no, my knight, not yet, they will be before you know it, now it’s time to get changed and comfy” you say as you pat his chest giving him a kiss on his heart. 
As soon as you both finished changing and turning in for the night, there was a knock at the door, you jumped up from the bed from where you and Noah, Noah jumped up as well, to hide from the door, he was used to it. 
You opened your door to be met with your mother, “hi, honey, hi Noah” she called out the last part poking her head in to see Noah pressed up as far as he can against the wall.  
You opened the door, giving her access to come in, Noah, who was still up against the wall, “Hi, your Majesty” Noah says firmly and strong. 
“I brought your pastries” you mother says, causing Noah to peel himself from the wall and make his way quickly over to where your mother was. 
All three of you sat on the bed, giving full attention to the queen. Your mother turned her attention over to Noah “I believe these belong to you” she says passing the plate over to Noah, grinning like a kid getting candy after begging all day. 
As you all spoke about the relationship and the rules that still have to be enforced “now, you both understand your duties, I say as your queen, I still expect you, Noah” she calls, Noah having his full attention to her, not touching the pastries yet, he was strict on not eating until while important info was being said, didn’t matter if it was at dinner or if he was traveling the rule will stood strong. 
“You know your job, and what you have to do, all of that still stands, nothing changes, except a few things” she says as a fact, “if you wish to marry her, you do understand what will happen, yes?” She asks, there were to be no miscommunication, or no confusion. Noah nodded his head “yes, your majesty” he says firmly, he always took the job seriously.  
“You will become King, and you as well as her” referring to you, as you sat you started to pick at the sheets, you were worried that he might think they were forcing it but you both knew what that was how it was. 
“Will rule this palace and lead the village, I don’t worry for that, you are a strong man, Noah, you have gained my full trust as well as her fathers, and we want to thank you for putting your life on the lines for us the and the hundreds of others” your mother continued to speak.  
“Now, I don’t mind you staying in here, as I see my daughter has already beat me to the news” she says taking attention to the case resting to the side of the room.  
Noah’s cheeks flushed from the comment; he was usual good at hiding his emotions, but he couldn’t help but feel his heart swell at the thought of the sword. 
“Thank you, your majesty. The sword means a lot to me and your daughter means the world to me, I will do whatever it takes to lead this village into a stronger and brighter future as the days, months and years go on” Noah states firmly.  
“There’s no need, Noah, you’ve showed us your thanks by taking on this role of protecting her.” Your mother says as she stands, placing a hand on Noah’s shoulder, giving him a smile “Y/N doesn’t get any pastries” causing Noah to burst out laughing, “take that, my lady” he says taking a bite of the sweet treat, warm sweet smile on his face.  
“What?! I bribed the baker for those pastries! I deserve some of those pastries I’ll have you know!” You barked out loud whipping your head around to your mother as she left the room laughing. 
As you sat back down and turned your head at Noah, you laid your head on his shoulder, “guess I’ll be sleeping here more often” he jokes, placing a kiss on your forehead. “Oh, for sure” you giggled out. 
You both sat in silence for a bit before you started to reach for a pastry before the plate was grabbed and held in the air. 
Looking at Noah like he was crazy with a matching look on his towards you. “What are you doing?” You asked bewildered at how quick he was to move it away from you. 
Noah licked the rest of his strawberry paste off his finger, shaking his head, brows furrowed “no, my queen, your Majesty said so” he says. 
You sat in your place as you both stared at each other. Noah still held the plate in the air, careful not to let the rest of the pastries slide off the plate. 
You tried to reach again before Noah pulled away more, eyes on each other. “Give me one”  
“No” he says shaking his head chuckling “these are mine, your majesty said so” you looked up at the plate and then back at him before jumping up to grab one. Noah quickly placed the plate to the side before grabbing you, holding you by the waist.  
You continued to try and reach one “give me one” you said once again as you tried snake out of his arms.  
“No, they’re mine” he chuckles out as your plan failed “remember when I snuck a pastry for you on guard duty” you say trying to play his game causing him to laugh, “okay, okay, my love, you can have a pastry” Noah laughed out before letting you get one. Pulling you and the plate into his lap, kissing your cheek. 
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lukehughes43 · 2 years ago
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dial drunk
trevor zegras x reader based and inspired by the song "dial drunk" by noah kahan.
warnings: drinking, angst, lots of angst, swearing, a few mentions of sex word count: 17,332 i'm sorry😭
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“hey y/n/n, it’s uh, it’s trevor.” 
his words were slurred together into one big drunken mess which trevor always turned into when he was home in bedford at the same time as you. despite everything telling you to delete the message right then and there, you kept listening, feeling as if there was something you needed to hear from his drunken ramblings.
“fuck i don’t even know why i’m calling you,” his laugh had a melancholy feeling to it, “i just remembered i promised to forget you, doya remember that, y/n/n?” 
of course, you remembered. you were the one who made him promise to forget all about you after your less-than-clean break-up nearly three years ago now. thinking that it would be best for both of you and selfishly more so better for yourself. 
“but i broke that promise, just like i broke so many other promises, right y/n/n?” there was a painful silence as it seemed as if he was waiting for you to answer him. only it was a voicemail, and you were never going to answer him. “wrong.” it was a hissed out slur. one that caused your heart that was finally taped together to slowly unravel. “i never broke any promises to you, y/n, well except this one.” 
trevor let out a sigh, “i uh, i’m only making this fucking call because i have to tell you something. because i called you two nights ago. you hung up on me. you didn’t call me back.” he was hiccuping between words, whether it was because he was drunk or on the verge of having a breakdown was unclear to you. “i don’t like it, that they called you. that even after all this time i’m still so fucking in love with you i gave them your name y/n. your name. in a city full of my family and friends, but i said your name.” that’s when the tears fell. 
for both of you.
you listened to him fall apart from the safety of your childhood bedroom that still had pictures of trevor and you lingering around it. hands tugging at the loose thread of your duvet as his sobs rang throughout your ears like your dial tone did when he tried calling you last night - surprised that he managed to hear your honey-sweet voice on your voicemail outgoing. 
“i just wanted you to know that - that i don’t like that i gave them your name as my emergency phone call as they threw me in the cop car.” there was a long sigh before a forced laugh fell from his lips, “and one more thing, the cops? yeah, all of them thought you were wrong for hanging up on me.”
there was another beat of silence and you knew it was because he was contemplating what to say next. if he even wanted to say something, or just hang up on you, your voicemail, like you had him two nights ago when he was hurt and needed you. 
he let out another shaky breath before he contiuned speaking, sending you into a crippling mess. “i dial your number drunk, y/n. honestly, at this point i’ll probably die a drunk, but that doesn’t change the fact that i would still die for you.”
and just like that, the message was over. trevor’s normally smooth voice was gone, the only thing to be heard was the sound of the rain falling against the glass of your window and your heart shattering in the pit of your stomach once more. 
----
being back in bedford was normally exactly what trevor needed to rest from the demanding schedule of the nhl. normally being the keyword in that sentence. bedford had lost its calming effect on trevor the moment you had broken up almost three years ago. now he only had a sense of calm in his hometown when you were stuck away in boston because of school. what happened when you were in bedford at the same time? trevor turned into a drunken mess, days blurring together and not in a good way, praying that the alcohol would help suppress his feelings if he were to run into you. hoping that it would help him forget you like he had promised that night you stood across from each other in the cold new york air. 
only it never did, despite how hard he tried. 
meaning the time trevor spent in bedford grew shorter and shorter each time he came to visit his family. reaching the point where he spent the entire summer split between the hughes lake house, and jack and quinn’s shared home in michigan last year just to get away from the pain you still caused him. 
pain caused based on the fact you refused to love him anymore, and he still wasn’t sure why. 
trevor and you had been together for four years before you decided to break up with him before he left for world juniors in the winter of 2020 (in which he went on to win mvp and a gold medal). you were crazy about each other and had been since you first met. your relationship had made it through two different long-distance periods, was going to make it through a third before you ended it, and everyone was convinced you were going to get married. that’s why you ending it blindsided him as much as did. sent him into such a spiral that he had no choice but to take out his emotions during the world juniors tournament and walk away the highest-scoring american since jeremy roenick. 
after winning gold and heading back to san diego he was fine. at least that’s what he told everyone - including himself. in reality, he was drowning every night in his tears and not drinking alcohol, yet. the drinking started that summer. 
he was out to eat with his family on the main stretch of roads that ran right through bedford. his world stopped as he watched you walk across the street, laughing along to something your best friend gracie had said. the wind was taken right from his chest as his green eyes stared at you, willing you to look over at him, to see him, to will him back to breathing. only you didn’t even turn your head in his direction, instead ducking inside the little coffee shop and sitting at a table full of friends he recognized from your grad party. 
that was the first time he had seen you since you broke his heart into a million different pieces, and it was the first time he felt the need to drink himself to sleep while in the same city as you. each time he’d seen you since then had gotten more complex and harder for him. causing him to keep reaching for whatever bottle he could get his hands on once he was safe from the curse of you. 
leading up all to this moment in time. june seventh, two thousand and twenty-three. 
his hand was shaking as he reached for his phone, throat dry despite the empty corona bottle that rested in the cup holder of his plastic chair. your contact was taunting him, your e/c eyes staring back at him from the picture he had never changed. your entire contact in his iphone remained as it did three years ago, “y/n/n<3” right in the middle of the screen, and the picture of you hoisted up on his back at the draft staring back at him right above it. 
there wasn’t a chance for him to even think about what he was doing, not that he could because he was far from sober after all, the dial tone was filling his ears. as trevor sat and waited for you to pick up the phone it felt as if the entire world was on the verge of falling apart around him. he thought it was about to end completely when the dial tone finally came to an end, only instead a recording of your voice filled his ears:
“hey, it’s y/n! sorry i missed your call, i’ll call you back as soon as i can. until then, smile at a stranger and make their day. bye!” 
the twenty-two-year-old had to choke back a sob at the sound of your voice for the second time in three years. he’d never made it this far before, to your voicemail, normally he hung up after the second ring of the dial tone. that was until two nights ago when he called you from the police station after the ride in the back of the cop car. now he was struggling with what he wanted to say to you in the first place, the drunk thoughts overpowering his sober thoughts that he was originally called to try and say. 
“hey y/n/n, it’s uh, it’s trevor,” he began. silently praying the slur in his words wasn’t as noticeable through the phone as if you were going to be sitting here next to him. “fuck, i don’t even know why i’m calling you.” a heartbreaking laugh fell passed his lips, hand running through his rain-soaked hair. “i just remembered i promised to forget you, doya remember that, y/n/n?” 
while he thought he could get away with slurring in his opening sentence he knew you’d hear the slurring of his words in that line, practically able to smell the alcohol through the phone that he reeked. light beer and fresh rainwater were the new scents trevor zegras was sporting, his favorite when he was stuck in his thoughts about you. thoughts like why you even asked him to promise you something like that, how was he supposed to forget you? he’d been in love with you for four years before you broke things off, you can’t just force yourself out of love. 
shaking his head he pulled himself out of his drunken thoughts to get back to the task at hand, “but i broke that promise, just like i broke so many other promises, right y/n/n?” licking his lips trevor stayed silent, wanting for a response. for your voice to cut through the patter of raindrops on the hardwood beneath his bare feet. wait for you to exclaim ‘you never broke your promise, trevor john’ only there was no answer. there would never be an answer so he hissed out, “wrong. i never broke any promises to you, y/n, well expect this one.” sighing he fell back into his chair, reaching down into the cooler next to his chair, and pulled out another beer. “i uh, i’m only making this fucking call because i have to tell you something.” he popped the cap of the corona off before speaking again. “because i called you, two nights ago.” drink. “you hung up on me.” drink. “you didn’t call me back.” drink. “i don’t like it, that they called you. that even after all this time i’m still so fucking in love with you i gave them your name, y/n. your name. in a city full of my family and friends, but i said your name.” tears began to carve a path down his tanned cheeks, mixing with the rain drops as they both fell in a perfect rhythm together. 
his sobs subsided just enough to get out the right of his message. “i just wanted you to know that - that i don’t like that i gave them your name as my emergency phone call as they threw me in the cop car.” a mix between a deep sigh and a laugh-filled the dark backyard before he left his final blow: “and one more thing, the cops? yeah, all of them thought you were wrong for hanging up on me.” 
trevor fought with himself, trying to decide if he was worth telling you. worth allowing himself to turn into the charming young man you once knew, and for a split second, what remained of his former self had shown through and he let out the confession he was terrified to hear, and more terrified of what you would do once you’d listen to his voicemail. if you even did listen to his voicemail. 
“i dial your number drunk, y/n.” tears fell down his cheeks as he allowed the self pity to wash over him. as he finally accepted the fact he was the villain in what was a once a famed love story. “honestly, at this point i’ll probably die a drunk, but that doesn’t change the fact that i would still die for you.” 
he hit the red circle so quickly that he almost cut off his final word, but he didn’t care. because now he was stuck thinking about how his downward spiral caused by you breaking up with him three years ago had hit its rock bottom two nights ago. all because he started throwing drunk punches to defend the honor of somebody he didn’t even know anymore. 
----
june fifth, two thousand and twenty-three. while to many others it was just a normal monday night at the start of summer, to you and trevor, june fifth was the biggest turning point in your no longer-existent relationship - yet neither of you knew it. 
while you were in your room getting ready for a date - only the second one you’d gone on since breaking up with trevor - your former lover was busy writing down a list of food needed from the grocery store. as you finished applying your lipstick (trevor’s favorite shade on you no less) he was across town throwing reusable bags into the back of his bronco. 
there were butterflies in your stomach as you walked downstairs to sit and wait in your living room. since trevor, this was the first time you had genuinely felt nervous over a guy. granted it was only the second date you had gone on in close to three years you still had hooked up with a couple at parties but none of them made you feel anything and left you thinking about trevor as you waited to make your escape once they’d fallen asleep. 
trevor on the other hand couldn’t keep a girl even if he wanted to. how could he when every girl he spent time with he compared directly to you - the love of his life? occasionally he’d find himself stumbling around a random girl from the bar’s apartment, but it never lasted. no matter how good the sex was, or wasn’t, he was never completely satisfied. his mind stuck thousands of miles away with you. 
your date, charlie, was over ten minutes late the next time you glanced at your phone and the butterflies in your stomach had slowly started to die. sighing you slouched back against your coach while trying to ignore the watchful eyes of your parents. both who were still pro-trevor, and made it known to you how much damage you had caused the ‘sweet boy’ whenever they had a chance. not that you could blame them though, you knew how much you hurt him. you just knew staying with him would hurt you even worse.
the star ducks player was right on schedule as he began his trek across bedford to the grocery store. waving as he drove past charlie henderson, an old friend from elementary school, having no idea that he was on his way to pick you up for a date. the blond waved back almost instantly, smiling two times as wide for two different reasons. the first being he was on his way to your house and not trevor, something he would have never dreamed of in a million years. the second was because it was trevor fucking zegras waving at him, and to be honest, he was surprised trevor even remembered he existed. 
by the time charlie pulled into your half-circle driveway, he was a total of twenty minutes late. not to mention that when he arrived he didn’t run up to the door and eagerly knock with a bright smile on his face. instead, he chose a more twenty-first-century approach with a ‘here’ text message on snapchat. what remained of the butterflies you once had in your stomach had officially died with that. sighing you pushed yourself off the couch and walked towards the entryway, “um charlie’s here so i’m gonna go. i’ll see you guys tomorrow?” 
a disappointed look painted your mother’s face, while your father began to shake his head. muttering something into your mother’s ear so you didn’t overhear him. however, as you walked out the door you did hear the comment your mother threw out, “trevor never showed up late. he always came to the door.” her words were sharp and cut deep into your heart. suddenly something that seemed to be going so well was going so terribly wrong. 
it was pure luck, rather an unfortunate circumstance, that as trevor was walking out of the grocery store as you and charlie were stuck at the red right in front of the store’s parking lot. even hundreds of yards away trevor could make out your h/c curled as your head rested against the window. in an instant, trevor’s semi-decent mood had shifted to one of pure heart-shattering agony. had he been thinking straight he would’ve remembered you only leaned your head against the car window when you wanted to go, only he was currently thinking of the closest bar as the ten minutes drive back home seemed too far of a wait for him. 
you saw him as soon as charlie rolled the car to a stop. he hadn’t seen you yet, head tucked down looking at the blacktop and his rainbow flip-flops. until by some stroke of luck, perhaps unfortunate circumstances, he looked up and saw you. his green eyes tripled in size as he stared at you and you knew it was because you were in the car with a guy who wasn’t him. your knees were already pointed towards the car door, only now they were touching the plastic interior. this had to have been a sign - seeing trevor. you wanted to curl up into yourself as you waited for what seemed like forever at this light. praying that trevor couldn’t see the way you were staring right back at him, longing to be stuck at this red light with him instead of charlie, yet you wouldn’t admit that to anybody but yourself. 
as the light turned green three things happened to three different people. 
trevor dropped his reusable bags full of groceries and ran to his car. desperate to drown his pain with the company of the strangers who filled his hometown.
y/n watched with a subtle pang in her chest, feeling as if she broke his heart all over again. tears pricked her waterline as she drove away from the scene with a man she no longer wanted to be with. 
and charlie continued to ramble aimlessly on about how he is the president of a frat at u-maine. completely obviously to the hurt, the two former lovers were going through. instead when he caught the sight of the bright yellowish-orange bronco he cut his ramblings off to say, “hey! i saw trevor on my way to pick you up. ya know, he even waved to me. i had no idea he still knew who i was. i mean he’s a bigshot nhl player now. probably pulling instagram models - girls that are way out of his league. then again he probably learned how to do that from you, right y/n/n?” 
a shaky breath left your mouth as you turned away from the window for the first time since you got in the car. “excuse me?” you huffed, arms crossing over your chest as your eyes narrowed at him. “are you implying trevor’s out of my league, charlie?” 
with a fight breaking out on a first date in the silver honda accord, an internal war was raging in the confines of the yellow bronco. with heaving breaths trevor began to pull at his hair. “she’s on a date. y/n’s on a date with charlie henderson? there’s- there’s.” his words were cut off as he began to slam his hands down against the steering wheel. trying to prevent the tears that were collecting on his lashes from falling. “fuck!” he screamed, voice rattling the glass of his windows as he did so. 
“what?! no! no-” sighing charlie shrugged his shoulders while barely glancing over at you. “i mean yeah, everyone thought so, y/n. it was only a matter of time until he broke up with you, so when news traveled back that you broke up with him. nobody believed it. i mean come on y/n/n, trevor was always going to end up in the nhl, and you’re what, going to be a kid’s doctor? yeah i dunno, like i said it was only a matter of time.” 
trevor clenched his fist before he reached forward with shaking hands to his steering wheel. starting the car and backing out as fast as he could. making sure he went in the complete opposite direction of the silver honda that you sat in, not able to bear it if he saw the two of you at the bar while he tried to drink his pain away. 
the tears fell faster than you could stop them as you stared over at him in awe. he had managed to hit every single one of your insecurities from dating trevor right on the head, and threw them back in your face like you were nothing. with trevor splitting time between the gulls in san diego and the ducks in anaheim a war had begun to grow between your head and your heart. thinking about how he could spend all of his free time with a new instagram model every night, but you knew he wouldn’t do that. not when the both of you had talked about marriage and starting a family for hours on end. only as time went on, and the bigger trevor started to get, you felt as if you were slowly falling into the shadows of his life. then there was the fact you felt as if your career wasn’t enough for him, or for your future. self-doubt was a powerful demon, working its magic to make you believe as soon as trevor was a full-time nhl player he would force you to abandon your studies for your future career and turn into a full-time nhl girlfriend who sat there and looked pretty. so by thanksgiving you had made up your mind to end things with the then nineteen-year-old. forcing yourself to slowly fall out of love with him. something you were still forcing yourself to do even after all this time. 
as soon as trevor pulled into the little dive bar a couple miles outside of town he was reaching for his phone. he scrolled through his messages for the one person who wouldn’t ask him any questions as to why he disappeared and never returned with the groceries. double clicking on the picture of his brother and him from a wrestling meet - three years ago in december - he typed out a frantic message before turning his phone off and walking into the bar:
something came up.  couldn’t get the groceries home. they’re laying in the middle of the parking lotor i’ll venmo you $200 and you can buy more
griffin zegras, while being the younger brother he loved just as hard as his older brother, and was even wiser than the eldest zegras sibling. so when he got the message from his older brother he knew right away that you came up. while he didn’t know what had exactly happened, he had a suspicion that it was something pretty drastic for trevor to drop the groceries in the middle of a parking lot and rush away to an undisclosed location. sighing he liked the message before walking towards the door, “come on av, we gotta go get the groceries.” 
an angered laugh fell past your lips as you glared over at the boy. “it was only a matter of time?” shaking your head you looked down at your phone to see that it had only taken fifteen minutes for the date to get completely blown to shit. “you know charles, i’m starting to remember why i never was interested in you during high school,” you started to explain, wiping the tears from your eyes. “because you’re a selfish asshole who gets off on the downfalls of other people, so i think it’s time you take me home.” 
“i need the strongest drink you have,” was the first thing out of trevor’s mouth as he threw himself down on the bar stool. the hood of his sweatshirt pulled over his head in an attempt to blend in with the crowd so nobody realized it was him ‘trevor zegras center for the anaheim ducks’ when all he wanted to be was ‘drunk guy at the bar number two.’ 
charlie stared over at you with a look of complete disbelief, nobody had ever called him out on his bullshit before tonight. why would they when he could just buy his friend's company with all the money his parents make? his shocked expression remained etched across his face as he pulled into a dunkin parking lot to turn around. even more shocked that he was following through with your wishes of going home when he had waited years for the opportunity to go out with you. yet here he was, giving in to you without any protest, because deep down he knew you were right. he just wasn’t willing to openly admit it. 
within the first five minutes of sitting at the bar counter, trevor had managed to completely down the moscow mule which was placed in front of him, as well as three shots of vodka. with his vision toeing the line of fuzzy and seeing straight he backed off the hard alcohol and ordered a bud light. with his buzz well in place, he knew he’d be okay to sip on a beer as you were a distant thought in his alcohol-clouded head. 
“oh hi honey, you’re back early.” the sound of your mother's voice was next to one of the last things you wanted to hear as you slowly shut the front door behind you. originally hoping that you could sneak back in without facing the questions as to why you were home. yet your parents' movie night completely ruined that plan. taking a deep breath you walked into the open space, and the scene of seeing your parents happily cuddled up together, how to lose a guy in 10 days on tv, caused you to turn into a sobbing mess. because all you could think of at that moment was how you wanted your future to look exactly like this with one certain person: trevor. 
charlie watched as you walked in your front door, and as soon as it was closed he was speeding out of the half-circle driveway towards his sanctuary: the bar. more specifically the bar that trevor was currently holed up in, but neither of them knew this. instead, both of them were both stuck in their thoughts on how to drink enough to get you off their minds. 
when you had left for your date with charlie, someone whom both of your parents didn’t think was right for you, they agreed to not say another word on the matter to you. meaning they weren’t going to bring up trevor unless you did. all they wanted was for you to be happy, and if this so-called charles henderson fellow, umaine frat president, could make you happy, then that was all they cared about. so they went along with their nightly plans of watching a rom-com, drinking a bottle of wine, and falling asleep on the couch just like they did in their first year of marriage. just as andie was about to ask ben for another diet coke at the knicks game, you opened the front door. reaching forward, your mother set down her wine glass and paused the movie before turning to look back at you, “oh hi honey, you’re back early.” your father squeezed her hand that he was holding as they both watched the tears begin to fall down your cheeks, simultaneously breaking their hearts. “sweetie what happened? you haven’t cried over a boy since tr-” immediately she caught herself by clearing her throat and restarted. “oh honey, come here.” 
time had seemingly stopped for trevor. was this his first beer or his third? he couldn’t remember anymore. while he had started as casually sipping, he soon began to finish them faster than intended as he realized he had nothing to keep him occupied other than the bottle in his hands. with his phone turned off and stashed away in his pocket, not wanting his family or the boys to have his location pinging at a bar, he was completely alone. normally when he did this at home he had the company of a friend over a facetime call. every night it bounced around from person to person. when he wanted someone to help him reflect on the past with you it was spencer, as he was the resident third wheel of your relationship, having grown across the state line separating new york and connecticut with you. on the nights he didn’t want to talk or think about you at all, like tonight, he would call jamie since he never had the chance to meet you. jamie also missed out on the man trevor was before the breakup. while he was still charming, he would change from charming to alarming in seconds, jamie always had to walk on thin glass. nights where he just wanted comfort it was griffin, as there was nothing better than brotherly love, and someone able to hold you while you fall apart. except for tonight, trevor had nobody. he was completely and utterly alone with nobody he knew: until the front door opened and in walked charlie henderson.
sniffling, you wiped away the tears that clung to your jawline before offering your parents a small smile, “can i crash date night after i change?” instantly your mother was nodding her head, your father smiling over at you softly. this gives you the chance to run up to your room and change into the only piece of clothing that could give you comfort when you heart this bad, trevor’s boston university hockey sweatshirt. the last team issued one he got before the covid pandemic shut down his college career and he signed with the ducks. when you wore the gray sweatshirt it felt like he was right there with you. holding you close and promising you everything was going to work out for the better. his scent had long faded, but the idea of it being his was what grounded you. so much so that you were reaching for your phone and his contact. 
trevor’s once relaxed body had now become rigid at the sound of charlie’s smooth voice. he was too afraid to dare to look over and risk seeing you hanging off his arm, so instead he ordered another beer and turned so his back was completely towards his former classmate. he hadn’t understood why you agreed to go out on a date with charlie henderson. in high school, he was nothing but sleazy. flaunting his parents' money around to gain the attention of girls, and the friendship of the boys in your grade. sure he was good-looking, but trevor was certain there wasn’t a single brain cell behind those dull, lifeless eyes. when he went away to avon trevor would hear all about the charlie stories through you. how you would roll your eyes every time he tried to make a move on you, always pointing out that you and trevor were still very much together. so it bewildered him that you were currently on a date with charlie ‘frat president’ henderson. then again, people change and maybe charlie had. trevor knew that he had changed for the worse, maybe charlie had changed for the better. and who was he to judge you for your choices? he didn’t even know you anymore. 
tears stung your eyes as you stared down at the contact that no longer had a name, but you would know the phone number despite the missing name, even if there was still a random selfie trevor had taken as the contact photo. why you had kept the photo but erased his name made no sense to you back then, and even less now, but that’s not what you were worried about. instead, you were worried about how your hands were shaking as your finger ghosted over the call button. your heart was beating so hard against your rib cage it was starting to hurt. you couldn’t call him, not after all this time. not after ripping his heart out and throwing it on the ground to stomp on it, all while you were still madly in love with him. you couldn’t. yet, you did. 
if trevor’s phone had been on he would’ve felt it buzz in his pocket. he would’ve set his bud light down and pulled out his phone instead. the four-year-old picture would’ve flashed across his screen, your name lighting it up at the top. tears would’ve formed in his eyes as he stared down at the eighteen-year-old versions of yourselves before swiping the answer call across his screen. he would feel charlie henderson’s eyes on him as he let out a breath with one thing leaving his lips, “y/n/n.” 
only trevor’s phone didn’t buzz, and your call would be missed as he took another sip of his beer. he was trying his hardest to tone out charlie’s voice which seemed to get louder and louder by the second as if he was trying to get under trevor’s skin. like he knew it was him sitting four stools down from him, and he knew just how to hit the twenty-two-year-old right where it hurt and choose to punch a man while he was down. he had started to bring up you. 
the moment charlie walked into the bar he had known it was trevor perched up at the counter. at first, he told himself if he was just going to leave it alone, pretend he didn’t see him like every other person in the bar, and go on with his night. drinking little fruity cocktails while he joked around with his friends to get his mind off you and the date that was a disaster. he was fine doing that until one of his dorky tag-a-long friends didn’t get the memo that they weren’t supposed to bring up the fact he wasn’t supposed to be here and said, “aren’t you supposed to be out with y/n l/n right now?” while he could’ve chosen the easy road of telling the truth, one that would shatter his ego and imagine amongst his friends, he began to see red and chose the complete opposite. he chose violence.
“hey, it’s z! sorry i can’t get to the phone right now, i’ll give ya a call when i can!” the voicemail recording caused the sinking feeling in your heart to grow even larger. sniffling you hit the big red end button as the woman's voice explained the steps of leaving a voicemail. you knew you shouldn’t have called, and that trevor not answering wasn’t a surprise to you. running a hand through your curls you slipped the phone into the pocket of his sweatshirt, pulled on a pair of shorts, and walked downstairs to meet your parents. “i’ll make more popcorn if you guys pour me a glass?” 
“yeah i was, but she was just so boring,” charlie drawled, trying to think of more lies he could say to cover for himself. “y/n l/n isn't interesting in the slightest. i really don’t get what people see in her.” as his friends kept laughing the smile on his face grew more and more. fuelling the fire that now burned inside of him. nobody called charles j. henderson out on his bullshit and got away with it. 
at first, trevor thought he was hallucinating hearing your name come out of charlie’s mouth. because there was no way charlie henderson called you, y/n m/n l/n, boring and uninteresting. so much to the point that he had to end the date twenty minutes after it started. “yeah, you don’t even understand. she was like, fake sobbing because i told her i couldn’t do it. like i’m sorry, i don’t want to spend my night with a girl who’s clearly a four.” finishing his drink he threw three twenty dollar bills down before turning in his seat to look down the bar at charlie. his blood was already boiling, yet he was still waiting for the prime opportunity to pounce on the scumbag. 
with a fresh bowl of popcorn resting on the coffee table, and three full glasses of wine surrounding it, you were finally ready to settle down on the couch with your parents to watch the movie. “we restarted it for you, honey. we know how much you like this movie,” your dad said while smiling over at you. taking note of the way you clung to the sweatshirt that was on your frame. he pressed play and you let out a blissful sigh, staring at the opening credits and thinking about how for the next hour and a half, you’d be starting at a young matthew mcconaughey who you thought looked uncannily like trevor in this movie. trying to completely forget about the fact he had sent you to voicemail. 
“i don’t think y/n’s a four,” one of charlie’s cronies replied sheepishly, pushing the salt around the rim of his margarita. “she’s like, one of the hottest girls i’ve ever seen! and i mean, she pulled trevor zegras.” charlie cringed at the thought of you and trevor happily together. all he wanted was a chance with you, and the one time he got that chance it was ruined by some stupid nhl player who didn’t even graduate college. meanwhile, he had graduated and on top of that, he did it while organizing frat party after frat party. what did trevor do? nothing! he left you up for grabs three different times because of hockey. in his opinion it was time you dumped him, even if he was out of your league, so you could settle down with somebody more like him. seeing how displeased charlie had grown with his comments in defense of you, matt the cronie, frowned before changing his tune about you. “yeah you’re right, char, she is a four. a total four! i mean, what did zegras even see in her, to begin with? probably only stuck with her because she was too ugly to cheat on him, and wouldn’t feel bad cheating on her when he left for hockey.” 
if the words charlie’s friends were spewing about you weren’t enough to get his blood boiling, then the way charlie’s lips curled up into an evil smile was. he rushed off of his stool and stomped his way over to the group, a scowl on his face as he watched all of them but charlie stare at him in awe. he was still a famous nhl player after all. “don’t you fucking idiots dare let y/n’s name leave your mouth again, or i swear to god i’ll kill you. all of you. she’s too pure-hearted and too good of a person for you to be dragging her name in the dirt. she’s the type of beautiful where you’re lucky to be in her presence. inside and out.” his nostrils flared as he heaved out every word laced with anger. “and you,” he seethed turning his full attention to charlie, “consider yourself fucking lucky someone as incredible as y/n agreed to go on a date with a self-absorbed egotistical asshole like yourself. you’re calling her uninteresting? the only thing you have to show for yourself is the fact you were a frat president at umaine, nobody gives a shit dude!” 
even with your attention on the movie you could feel the way your mother kept glancing over at you. you were an open book to her. you knew it was only a matter of time until she said you could talk to her, or asked about trevor’s sweatshirt. and as if almost on cue she leaned over to whisper into your ear. “do you want to talk about it, sweetie? it has to have been pretty bad if you’re wearing trevor’s sweatshirt. you only do that when you’re really upset.” shrugging your shoulders you reached forward and grabbed your glass of wine. praying that taking a sip would end her pestering. she ran a hand through your hair and pressed a kiss against your forehead, “whenever you’re ready, i’m ready.” only you didn’t think you’d be ready to talk about the events of this night for a long time. not until you at least figured it out for yourself, and you weren’t sure if you’d ever figure it out for yourself. 
the cronies were stifling back their laughter as they listened to trevor tear into their group's leader. only the laughter came to a halt as chalire jumped out of his barstool to stand chest to chest with the six-foot-even nhl forward. “think you’re a big man now that you’re in the nhl z?” charlie asked with a taunting tone, head tilted to the side as he just barely stared down at the hockey player. “well you’re not, dumbass. i mean look at you, you’re getting blackout drunk in a bar over your ex-girlfriend who broke up with you three years ago. you’re pathetic. just like y/n’s little dream of being a doctor.” matt and nate let out a chorus of ‘ooh’s’ like the group was still in high school, right away beginning to make small comments to each other. “maybe you guys did deserve each other, could’ve been pathetic together.” 
that’s when the first punch was thrown. 
“i tried calling him,” you whispered out only for your mother to hear. because you knew if your father heard it would be over. his hopes would get too high, and he would fly too close to the sun thinking he was about to get his best friend back. even your mother perked up hearing that you had called him. “but he didn’t answer,” you added, e/c eyes completely focused on the screen in front of you. “it’s probably for the best that he didn’t answer. i can’t blame him.” you were sniffling before burying your head in your mother’s chest. fighting back the tears as you snuggled closer to her. wondering why you had let your anxiety and the possibility of trevor and your relationship turning toxic steer you away from the only person you’d ever love.
your father listened from the other side of your mother, a frown overtaking his features while he sunk into the couch. he couldn’t help but feel as if all of this heartbreak had been his fault. he was the reason you and trevor had met in the first place. (the reason you had met spencer too but that’s beside the point right now). on the side of his day job as a pediatrician, he coached a local youth hockey team. while you played on the girl's team, your dad thought it would be best to avoid the whole politics of ‘parent coaches’ and stuck to the boys and that’s how he met trevor and spencer. you met at an outdoor jamboree at the ripe age of five, and since then you had been inseparable. it was only a matter of time until you and trevor ended up together, and nobody was happier about that than your father. trevor was the son he never knew he wanted. he just fit in with your family, with your lives. so when you came back inside that december night crying, saying you had broken up, poor d/n l/n felt like it was all his fault two of his favorite people in the world were crushed as badly and as deeply as they were. he still couldn’t forgive himself. 
trevor had swung at charlie first. his right fist splitting his lip in half. the blood coated his knuckles and the tiled floor. as he watched charlie stumble backward he turned his attention to matt first. “you know matt, i was going to spare you, but then you had to go and change your tune just for a couple of hundred bucks,” he slurred with a smirk on his face, “so i gotta do what i gotta do, i hope you can respect that man.” he didn’t give the boy chance to answer before he threw another heavy right hook. this time breaking the matt’s nose. the crunch of the cartilage breaking could be heard throughout the whole bar, and that’s what gained the attention of every bar-goer. trevor had sealed his fate as soon as the first punch was thrown.
the onlookers in the bar couldn’t believe what was happening in front of them. it wasn’t every day that a true bar fight broke out, and it certainly wasn’t every day that it was an nhl player took part in it. barry, the regular bartender, figured it would sort itself out. a couple of punches would be thrown and then the group would separate and there would be nothing to worry about. it would be a done deal. only that wasn’t what happened in this case. charlie henderson, after picking himself up off the counter, lunged forward and socked trevor right in the temple. laying it on thick enough to give the star player a black eye for a couple of days, maybe even a week. when trevor lunged forward and tackled the entitled prick to the grimy floor is when poor barry had to make the phone call to the police, seeing as matt and nate were doing absolutely nothing to help their friend, and trevor wasn’t stopping anytime soon. 
“sweetheart,” your mother cooed while running a hand up and down your back. “just give trevor a little time. you haven’t talked in nearly three years, he’s probably scared to hear from you considering the last time you saw each other
” as she trailed off you nodded along with what she was saying. she made a valid argument in trevor’s defense. if you were in his shoes, you wouldn’t answer you on the first phone call either. you asked him to completely forget you existed, so he had to have been fairly confused about why you were even trying to call him. you had never attempted to reach out to him before, but what he didn’t know is that you still kept tabs on him. asked spencer and your parents about him, sometimes even reaching out to jack if an opportunity presented itself to you. you still followed him on instagram to see what he was up to, but never liking any posts so he wouldn’t know. (he knew. he checked his following once a month to see if your name was still amongst the sea of random people he didn’t care about). you still cared about him and loved him, but he just didn’t know it, so you figured it was time to change that. if only he had answered the call. 
trevor’s knuckles burned with every punch he threw, pulling them as he knew he couldn’t beat this kid to a bloody pulp. although, if you looked at his split knuckles you would think that he had. the blood from charlie’s split lip and broken nose had coated his own on his cracked open knuckles. leaning over the man trevor tried to catch his breath before throwing one more threat his way. “don’t you ever fucking talk about y/n again. if i find out you did, i won’t be so gentle next time.” carefully he pulled himself off charlie before leaning back against a barstool, a bad decision on his part because the next thing he knew charlie was barking orders at matt and nate when he clearly should’ve sought medical attention for his broken nose.
within an instant the two cowards were pinning him down to the blood-filled floor as charlie leaned over with a nasty grin, blood dripping down to the tiles next to his dirty blond hair. 
“you’re going to wish you never threw that punch when i’m done with you, big z. cause you see, i have nothing to lose unlike you.” and with that charlie drilled him in the left side of his head, making sure that his black eye wasn’t going away for a long period of time. 
shrugging your shoulder’s you nodded, a defeated sigh leaving your lips. “yeah, i wouldn’t have answered me either,” you mumbled, curling yourself into the other end of the couch. beginning to nurse the glass of wine you were about to refill. eyes refocusing on the screen in front of you as ben and andie sat at a couple’s counselor. it was a cruel joke in your eyes now, that if you had thought of going to therapy by yourself or with trevor maybe none of this would’ve happened. maybe he’d be with you right now, cuddled up on the love seat throwing popcorn at each other while your parents looked on in awe of you. but you know what they say, dreams are for rookies. 
with each punch charlie landed on trevor’s face he felt his ego rise once more through his body. there was no doubt his left hook had broken trevor’s nose, blood having immediately started to gush from it. only that didn’t stop him. no, charlie was seeing red, while he may have been in the wrong he wasn’t going to let trevor off as easy he did him. no he wasn’t stopping until both eyes were black and blue, his nose was dislocated and resting against his left cheek, and his lips had cracks and split in them. he wanted trevor zegras to be unrecognizable when he was done with him, and he would’ve had his way if he hadn’t heard the sirens over the mood music in the bar. “oh fuck, that’s the cops!” charlie yelled, jumping off trevor. in the process, kneeing him right in the stomach. while it wasn’t intentional he couldn’t lie, he was happy it had happened. “nate, matt, we gotta get out of here. my dad still hasn’t paid my speeding tickets.” as they ran towards the front door it was pushed open by two middle-aged police officers. the ginger took in the scene in front of him, while the blond shook his head.
“nobody’s going anywhere. you’re all coming with us.” 
groaning out in agony trevor didn’t even try to pull himself off the floor. he was far too embarrassed by what had occurred to have the will to move. he was embarrassed about everything but defending your name. if you were still together and this had happened he knew you’d be giving him an ear full. telling him that your name isn’t as important as his reputation, and the status his name held. but ultimately you would cave, thanking him for defending you before the two of you fell asleep. now, he didn’t know what you would do when word got back to you. would you be mad at him? happy he stuck up for you? it would be a lie to say he didn’t care because he did. he had to know what you thought of the events that occurred. little did he know, but he would find out sooner rather than later what you thought of this little bar brawl.
“i’m going to grab the other bottle of red and make some nachos to go along with it. do either of my women need something while i’m up?” asked your father as he paused the movie, right as it was about to get good. classic dad move. your mother got up to accompany him, while you stayed rooted in your seat. finishing the glass in your hands. besides pausing movies at random times, your dad had always been a sweetheart. there was nothing more he wanted in life than to have a family, to have children. unfortunately for both your mother and father, you were the only child they were gifted with. it was a struggle to have you as your mother struggled with fertility issues, yet that didn’t damper either of their spirits, especially your fathers. during the day he thrived as a pediatrician that every parent wanted their child to go to. he had a gift when it came to children. and by night he was a resident youth hockey coach. but first and foremost he was a family man. there was nothing he wouldn’t do for either you or your mother. big or small, he was always the first person offering to help. he was the one who picked up your pieces after the breakup. he was your true confidant. he explained to you that at one point in their lives, your parents had broken up. your father was struggling to stay afloat in med school, and your mother was thriving at the bedford elementary school as a teacher. the distance, and the fact he felt he wasn’t enough for her, was enough for him to end their relationship. their break lasted almost a year until they reconnected in a hospital waiting room. it was because of your parents and your father practically doing the exact thing you did, that you even had the slightest hope you and trevor could rekindle your relationship. only, you were starting to realize, you should’ve called after year one, not year three.
“alright kid, time to get up,” the ginger officer drawled while leaning over to pick trevor up by his armpits. once he was up on his feet, the office turned trevor around and pressed him up against the bar counter, and pulled both of his hands behind his back. letting out a sigh trevor couldn’t help but shiver as the metal handcuffs were clasped around his wrists. he was soon pulled forward off the counter and was started towards the door, “you’re facing disorderly conduct. you have the right..” the officers' words trailed off in trevor’s head as he was brought back outside. the blond cop had charlie, matt, and nate huddled together on the hood of his car. he couldn’t quite make out what was being said, but it sounded as if charlie was trying to bribe the officer to not book them. the conversation was completely cut from trevor’s ear as his officer, officer collins, opened the back door, pushed his head down, and pushed him inside. as trevor stared up at him he could only think of one thing.
“wait!” he exclaimed as officer collins was about to shut the door, “my emergency phone call is y/n l/n.”
your mother came back into the room first giving you the perfect opportunity to ask. “mom, do you think there’s still a chance trevor and i end up together? i mean, like you and dad did?” she didn’t answer you, instead, she let out a sigh while leaning down and filling your glass of wine. you could tell that she was thinking of the right thing to say back to you, and that’s how you knew you most likely weren’t going to like the answer she had come up with. “you know mom, you actually don’t have to answer that. it’s silly of me to even think that we did have a chance to get back together. i blew it the moment i broke up with him in twenty-twenty.” while you were currently three glasses deep, starting your fourth, the buzz was beginning to hit you. since the breakup, red wine no longer made you horny as it once had while you were dating trevor, instead, it sent you in a downward spiral of your most inner ward thoughts. the downward spiral which was beginning to happen, yet you didn’t know how to make it stop before it got too bad. “i was so stupid to do that, break up with him. i thought we would end up in a toxic relationship. i thought we would end up hurting each other, so i chose to just hurt him instead. because while it hurt me to do, i got over it. i got over it faster than i should’ve, and every time i came home i wanted him again. i wanted us again, and this time i know i want him and only him forever.” taking a deep breath you looked up at your mother with tears forming in your eyes again, “so mom i do need to know, do you think there’s a chance me and trevor make it in the end?” 
officer collins shook his head while slamming the back door in trevor’s face. he stalled for a minute opening his notebook and grabbing his pen. quickly he scribbled down ‘y/n l/n’ before pocketing his notebook and pen and walking to the driver's door. he glanced in his side mirror to watch as officer shandy, the blond, shoved charlie henderson and the other two he didn’t know into the back of his car. he then switched his gaze to his rearview mirror to stare at trevor. he had his busted-up face pressed against his the glass window. he assumed that it was because the coolness of the glass felt good against his cut-up lips and bruised eyes. sighing he pulled his patrol car into gear and checked the mirror one more time before addressing trevor again. “don’t worry kid, we’ll get your face cleaned up then you can make your call.” 
“can i make the call first?” 
m/n l/n’s heart broke as she sat and listened to your ramblings. in a way she had felt guilty she was even hearing every word that you had begun to utter to her. of course she had thought about you and trevor getting back together multiple times. it was something she had thought of almost daily. but as time grew on she saw it becoming less and less likely of a happy outcome. she, of course, had known trevor would be more than willing to jump at an opportunity to get back together with you, it was you she was worried about. she figured as time grew on you would lose all your interest in the bedford native, so she was completely shocked to hear that you were still all in with trevor. “honey,” she sat back down next to you hands reaching forward and grabbing yours, “i think there’s a chance if you really want there to be.” she squeezed your hands before kissing the top of your head, “i wish i could discredit the words you had just said to me, but unfortunately i know that they hold nothing but the truth. but i do still believe that if you want to be with trevor then you'll find a way to end up with each other.”
“sure kid, you can make your call first if that’s what you really want.” officer collins answer had satisfied trevor to the point where he zoned out into his own little world for the remainder of the drive. by some stroke of fate, they were caught at the same red light charlie and you had been stuck at when trevor had seen you. he took it upon himself to look and see if someone had picked up his grocery bags, they had, griffin and ava having found them right away. his attention was then turned to the traffic lights that seemed to be speaking to him.
“will it be alright?” he asked, whether he spoke it out loud or if it was just in his head he got an answer regardless. as the light turned from red to green it spoke out with a defeated, “i don’t know.”
tears carved their way down your cheeks, leaving what you thought would be a permanent trail as you clung to the little bit of hope your mother’s words gave you. you cradled the wine glass close to your face, watching as your tears fell into the sea of red alcohol, trying to stop yourself from thinking about what your life would look like now if you had never broken up with trevor. thinking how you could be with him doing god knows what. maybe getting in a little trouble, maybe just spending the night in the back of his god-awfully colored bronco at the old lookout point. how he’d be busy cracking jokes, teasing you to no end, all while you playfully would shove his chest before grabbing his chain and pulling him in for another kiss. not stopping until your already swollen lips looked as if you were both stung by bees. instead, you were met with the cruel reality of not having a single clue where trevor was, or what he was doing. you were left alone with your thoughts about when things seemed as if they were never going to end and there was stuck with you: how did you ever think trevor zegras would turn out as a toxic person? 
if officer collins had been speaking to him, trevor wouldn’t have had a single clue as to what he was saying. the entire ride to the police station he was busy listening to the in-and-out crackling of the transmitter radio connected to the patrol car. he wasn’t listening to what the dispatcher was saying about situations that need police assistance, or even what the officers were saying in response to these calls. no, he was too busy listening to the static of the transmitter radio as it brought him some sort of weird comforting feeling in his drunken state. taking a deep breath to the beat of the static he sunk into the backseat, head still pressed against the glass staining it with blood and the lingering alcohol on his breath. the static helped lull him into a dreaming dazed state. one where he still had you. in his daydream, you were sitting on his lap as you and all of your friends were huddled around a fire at the hughes lake house. you had just spent the entire day wake surfing and tubing, and now you were sitting around the fire with newly sunkissed skin. the residue of s’more’s gracing the corners of both yours and trevor’s lips. you would be starting to fall asleep in his arms, lazily smiling and laughing at something cole had said before staring back up at trevor as his eyes would’ve already been on you. he was convinced that if you ever got back together his eyes would never leave you in fear of losing you again, so that’s how he pictured it. you falling asleep while staring up at him. surrounded by all of your friends, completely and utterly in love with each other. the sound of a page for officers interrupted the beauty of the transmitter radio static, as well as the daydream trevor, was lost in. groaning he smacked his head back against the headrest, starting the vicious self-loathing cycle he ended up when drunk - hating that he didn’t even know what he did wrong to have lost you. 
“how did i ever think trevor would end up as a toxic person?” 
before he knew it, officer collins was pulling open the back door again and greeted him with a tight-lipped smile. “alright kid let’s get this all over with.” sighing trevor barely nodded his head as collins pulled him out of the car, and slammed the door behind him once again. trevor kept his head down as he was led into the police station. praying that somehow, this would all work out where his name didn’t end up on page six of the local newspaper, and things wouldn’t reach the executive offices of the ducks. part of him knew it wouldn’t, not when charlie henderson couldn’t jeopardize himself or his last name either. yet as officer collins worked on taking his fingerprints he couldn’t help but begin to worry. about what you would think when you read about the charges in the local paper. what your parents would think, would they still like him? what his parents and family would say. he could already hear griffin’s voice saying ‘are you fucking stupid?’ but he was currently stuck on wondering what the ducks would say about all of this. what twitter would say, because sooner or later his entire life always ended up on twitter, it was always just a matter of time. somewhere in his train of thought, he was handed a plaque reading his name and the date for his mug shot, still clinging on to the piece of hope that all of this would get blown over as soon as charlie and his friends were brought in. he turned to the sides when told, hands tightly holding on to the black plastic in his hands. waiting patiently for his next instructions. until it happened, and he felt his heart race within the confines of his rib cage. 
“alright kid, you can go make your phone call now.” 
your mother seemed stunned at the question, you have completely caught her off guard once more. she remained silent as you tried to choke back the sobs that were about to resurface from earlier. remembering he hadn’t answered your phone call, wondering why you had felt like you weren’t enough for him, why you thought he would force you away from your dreams when he was the one who pushed you and supported you to try and accomplish them. (which you had since done. having graduated from boston college and were currently in the process of deciding which university to complete medical school at). you had helped save him countless of times before, no matter how drastic the measures you were there for him, and he was there for you. yet in your greatest time of need, when you needed him the most, you refused to open up enough to him to allow him to help combat your self-doubt and took the easy way out instead. “you lost your way for a little while, honey,” your mother finally spoke with ease to her words. trying her hardest to make you believe what she was saying. “you lost your way and lost sight of what was truly important to you other than your degree and med school, and that’s completely okay. you’re human - shit happens. you live and you learn. you lost sight of the person you loved because you were starting to lose yourself, but you’ve found your way back. it’ll all work itself out. eventually.” you threw yourself into your mother's arms, holding on to her for dear life. 
as your father walked back into the living room (trying his hardest to act as if he hadn't heard the entirety of your conversation) he couldn’t help but smile at the scene in front of him. happy you were finally allowing yourself to grieve with the loss of trevor and yours relationship, and that you were trusting your mother with this information. finally trusting in yourself to come to terms with the fact you needed and wanted trevor in your life because you loved him deeply. he kissed the top of both yours and your mother’s head before taking his rightful seat again. just in time for the sound of a phone ringing to interrupt the tender moment being shared. 
confused you pulled away from your mother's loving arms and fished your phone from the front pocket of your sweatshirt. confusion etched deeper in your face as the number popped up with a small caller id under it. licking your lips you looked at both of your parents as your heart started to race inside your chest, “it’s the police department.”
officer collins was nice enough to remove trevor’s handcuffs in order to make the call. so with shaky hands, trevor reached forward to the landline in a dimly light hallway. taking a deep breath in, he closed his eyes and punched in your phone number from memory. he could feel the tears prick at his waterline as he waited for you to pick up the phone. the dial tone rang loud in his ears until finally, it didn’t. and for the first time in three years, he heard the sound of your breathing. the silence was deafening as he waited for you to speak, desperate to hear your voice. then there it was: “hello?” 
after watching your parents shrug their shoulders you made the split decision to answer the call. you were met with the sound of breathing on the other line, mind racing as to who could possibly be calling you from the police station at this time of night. when the person on the other end of the line hadn’t spoken you took it upon yourself to. “hello?” you asked with uncertainty in your voice, and just by the sound of their sigh of relief you knew who it was instantly. “t-trevor?” it came out it in a choked back whisper, your mind not able to process the fact he was most likely in jail. “what, why are you calling me from the police station?” 
he could hear the panic in your voice through the phone, green eyes closing so he could picture what you looked like right now. the look of fear on your face from getting a call from an unknown number and it’s him. “uh, h-hi, y/n/n,” he slurred, tears slipping out of his closed eyes because he couldn’t believe it. you were on the phone with him. you were talking to him. this was real. 
this was real. for both of you. trevor was in the police station. he’d been arrested and he had chosen to call you. 
your heart dropped into your stomach as you felt anger rise through your body, yet you weren’t quite sure why. maybe it was because he had been arrested. maybe it was because the first time you’d heard from him in years was because he was calling you to come and bail him out. but at the same time, you tried to remain calm. preparing yourself for whatever it was that he was about to tell you. “so um, i’m sure you’re probably wondering what i’m doing calling you from the police station’s number.” he tried to force out a laugh, but next to nothing came out. and you could tell he was nervously waiting for your reaction.
“i mean it’s not every day you get a call from your ex-boyfriend.” your words had cut him deep. ‘ex-boyfriend’. he bit his lip in order to prevent a whimper from escaping his mouth at the dreaded word. “but then again, it isn’t every day you get a call from your ex-boyfriend who’s in jail, so yeah trev, i am wondering why you're calling me from the police station.” while your words had seemed bitter, your tone was nothing but soothing to him. he could tell you were currently trying to hold yourself together from the number of mixed emotions that had to have been coursing through your body. he also knew you meant no harm because you had called him ‘trev’. if you had called him anything other than that he knew you were over this. over him. over the phone call. over being his lifeline still after all this time. so with a small hopeful smile on his face, he started to make his case to you. 
squeezing your mother’s hand you braced for the explanation you were bound to hear. mind racing, and emotions swirling around like a tornado in your body. “i saw you,” he whispered, voice breaking as he spoke. you didn’t need to hear what he said next to know he saw you at the stoplight with charlie, moments before your desaster of a date ended. “at the lights with charlie fucking henderson of all people!” that caused your blood to begin boiling. while his opinion of charlie was accurate, it still irked you that he had to make it known he disapproved. you weren’t his anymore. you didn’t owe him any reasoning on why you went out with charlie. on why you were allowing yourself to settle for him when all you wanted was trevor, but you couldn’t tell him that. you couldn’t allow yourself to give him that satisfaction when he was rotting in a jail cell with the other drunks that had been brought in for the night. “and it just, it ruined me, y/n/n. it ruins me, destroies me, sending me into a crippling to depression to see you when i come home every summer. to see you happy, without me. to see that our relationship must have meant nothing for you to just let me go like that. without a fucking reason as to why!” you didn’t know how much more you could take of his drunken ramblings, because hearing the truth come from his lips was something you never wanted to hear. you knew you hurt him, ripped his heart out and stabbed him in the back, but you never wanted to hear him say that. to hear what it felt like for him to come home and see you. “because i still love you, y/n/n. i love you more than anything in this world. so much so that i got into a bar fight with charlie to defend you against everything him and his friends were saying about you. so much that i’m calling you from jail. i love you so much that i can’t be in bedford anymore, and if i am here i have to drink away any and all thoughts of you because i promised to forget you when you broke up with me.” 
trevor sat on the other end of the line, slumping against the white paint cracked walls. awaiting an answer from you after he had just poured his heart and soul out to you. he could hear his heartbeat ringing in his ears. felt the watchful eyes of officer collins, and now officer shandy, watching and listening to what could either break his heart all over again, or bring it back to life. 
“y/n?” he whispered out into your ear. “are you - are you still there?” the worry in his voice was evident, he thought he was about to lose you all over again, and you could feel yourself slipping away from him once more. closing your eyes you fought with the tears, your head, and your heart as you pulled the phone away from your ear. “i’m sorry, i know that it’s a lot to take in. and you didn’t ask for any of this. or want any part of me any-” his voice was cut off by the sound the sound the dial tone. your finger having pressed the red button to end his drunken pleas with you. every thought you had about wanting to with him still tonight fluttering out the window, because a villain isn’t supposed to show remorse to those they hurt, they just keep hurting them. 
the hockey player jumped up from his seated position as the dial tone filled his ears again. “no! no, no, no, no, no. y/n, baby please. please!” he all but screamed into the phone that no longer had a caller on it. officer collins and shandy both began moving closer to him, seeing this as a potential threat to himself. “fuck!” he all but raged as he slammed the black plastic back into its holder. then crumpling down into the floor. head between his knees as he sobbed to himself over losing you once again. 
“y/n, why did you hang up on him,” your mother exclaimed. shocked that you had done what you just had after pouring your heart and soul out to her about how you still loved the twenty-two-year-old, and wanted to be with him again. “what about what you told me tonight? he still loves you!” 
shaking your head you pushed yourself off the couch, reaching down for the new bottle of wine before making your way to the stairs. “and i love him,” you finally whispered out loud to both your parents. your e/c eyes stayed glued to the stairs as you tried to work yourself off the ledge you found your self towering on. “but i can’t love him when he’s like this, so i have to be the bad guy, because i can’t save him from himself this time.” you knew it was the truth, but still you couldn’t help but feel like you were lying to yourself. you were the one who caused this pain, this anguish for trevor, and it was only you who could save him from it. but you refused. so you walked up to your room, locking yourself in there with the full bottle of wine, taking a page out of trevor’s book and trying to drink any thought of him away.
officer collins crouched down in front of trevor and place a comforting hand on his shoulder. “look kid, i’m really sorry she hung up on you,” he started to say with a sullen look on his face, “it wasn’t right of her to do that. not when you clearly still need her in your life, but unfortunately there’s nothing else we can do. we gotta put you in the holding cell until henderson finishes up, and then this will all go away. i promise. nobody will ever know.” 
trevor’s head shot up to look at the middle aged man leaning over him. his head shaking vigorously to disagree with what he was saying. in an instant he was resting on his knees, clutching his hands together as he stared up at him. “i beg you, sir, just let me call.” his voice was filled with a pleading note as he stared up at officer collins, praying he could get through to him. “i’ll give you my blood alcohol, i’ll rot with all the burnouts in the cell,” he began to list while tears clung to his eyelashes. “i’ll change my faith, and and i’ll praise the flag!” he exclaimed, “let’s wait, i swear she’ll call me back.” 
the oldest man in the hallway let out a sad sigh before glancing to his partner, then back down at trevor. “son, are you a danger to yourself?” he hated asking that question, but trevor was starting to scare him. he needed to know how concerned he should be regarding this situation. 
anger flashed through trevor’s green eyes after the question was asked, and as it hung in the silence of the hallway he pushed himself up off the floor. shrugging away officer collins hands he scoffed, “fuck that, sir, just let me call.” the pleading look on his face was slowly starting to slip away into something almost nobody could read. “i’ll give you my blood alcohol. i’ll rot with all the burnouts in the cell. change my faith, and i’ll kiss the badge. please, let’s wait. i swear she’ll call me back.” this time he reached out forward and grabbed officer collins hands, begging with everything he had left in him. trying his hardest to flash what he considered his puppy dog eyes, and appeal to this mans better nature.
officer shandy stepped in next, his hand reaching for trevor’s shoulders and bringing his attention fully to him. trevor’s green eyes bored into his blue ones, and he could feel himself begin to crack under the honest weight the officers held. his charming demeanor falling as the questions was asked:
“son, why do you do this to yourself?” 
it hung in the air as trevor’s shoulders sagged, showing that he was defeated. he was only twenty-two after all. twenty-two but still in love with a woman who didn’t want him anymore, and he just couldn’t let go of you. silently he thought to himself, about there possibly being another reason as to why he allowed this all to happen besides him still being in love with you. that maybe he feared something more than having lost you. “i’m not proud of all the punches that i’ve thrown,” trevor mumbled out into the silence, to be heard by the awaiting ears of the officers. “in the name of someone i no longer know.” a small smile cracked his face when he said that. thinking about you, what your voice sounded like, picturing that scared look on your face when you realized he was calling your from a police station. “for the shame of being young, drunk, and alone,” he finished while looking between the two. “but i would die for her, y/n, even if i don’t know her anymore.” 
the three remained quiet for an unknown amount of time. it had seemed fitting to just sit there in a silence while they all tried to understand the full events of the night. their peaceful silence was broken by the wooden double doors being pushed open to what looked like on of the newer officers. “officer shandy, officer collins, sir, mr henderson his here and has requested the dropping of charges against trevor zegras, and for this all to go away,” he explained before  slowly slipping back inside the lobby of the police station. trevor’s green eyes turned to stare at officer collins, waiting for some sort of directions. 
“i told you it would work itself out kid, maybe there’s some hope after all for you,” he reasoned while beginning to lead trevor back into the main area. instead of taking a seat at officer collins desk trevor was brought face to face with the chain linked fence of the holding cell, only there was nobody else in there and it would be just him tonight. “this is just until somebody has time to drop you off at home, we’ve gotta file out this paperwork before we can.” 
nodding his head trevor walked into the cell before slumping down against the bench. “i guess i shouldn’t have wasted my call on somebody who was just going to hang up on me, huh?” he tried to joke, only it didn’t help him like he thought it would. office collins gave him a tight lipped smile before turning on his heels and walking back to his desk. leaving trevor to slowly let his eyes close as he tried to block out everything regarding the events of tonight, hoping it would being him some sort of comfort if he did so. 
as the sun disappeared, and the moon slowly got higher in the sky griffin, as well as the entire zegras household, was beginning to wonder just what had happened to trevor. “has anybody seen trevor?” julie asked, there being just a touch of panic in her voice. “he never came home after getting the groceries.” both ava and griffin shrugged their shoulders not having a clue as to where their brother went, while gary looked up from his newspaper bewildered by his wifes previous statement. griffin caught ava’s gaze from above his phone as they shared a look of ‘oh maybe we should be good siblings and go look for him’ before either of them got out of their seats and one inched towards the front door, while the other towards the stairs. 
“hey mom, i’m gonna go to nico’s and catch up with him. don’t wait up,” griffin all but yelled before he slipped out of the house without waiting for a reply. once in the safety of his car he opened his phone to the messages with his little sister praying that she had somewhat figured out trevor’s location. 
god trevor’s actually sofucking stupid. he’s at the police station. good lucksoldier
groaning griffin threw his head back against the headrest, of course trevor was at the police station. it was only a matter of time until his drinking got him stuck in there. shooting ava a quick text he threw his phone down and sped out of their drive way towards the police station, only slightly worried about what trevor was waiting for him when he got there. 
there sound of a soft knock on your door startled you mid swig of wine, your body jolting forward enough to cause the red liquid to swirl around in the glass bottle. when the knock was heard again you set the bottle down and padded across the hardwood floor to your bedroom door. taking a deep breath you steadied yourself before reaching towards the silver handle, praying only slightly that when you opened the door it would be trevor standing there to greet you. to explain to you how all of this was just a misunderstanding, and it was all going to work out for the better. only when you pulled the door open you were met with your father’s sullen face, his hands clasped in front of him. “i know you’ve already talked enough about this issue tonight, sweetheart,” he started, his tone soft yet firm. “and there’s probably next to nothing left to say, but that doesn’t change the fact that you are the key to this solution, whether you like it or not, and i think it’s time you own up to it.” your eyes fell downcast as you took in his words, knowing that what he said held nothing but undeniable truth. shuffling you moved out of the doorway enough for your father to walk through before closing the door behind him. he led the way over to your bed, sitting himself on the edge, waiting for you to make the next move. 
taking a deep breath you sat down next to him, eyes glancing towards the bottle before you looked down at your hands. “if i’m the solution, where do i start?” 
it had seemed as if hours had passed by in the time trevor had closed his eyes until he heard yelling coming from every direction. only when he opened his eyes and found a clock he realized it had only been nearly twenty minutes. groaning he slammed his head back against the wall, green eyes glancing around the cell to see there was two new additions, nate and matt. trevor offered an awkward half wave to the two boys, which they both returned. “‘m sorry i beat you guys up,” he then apologized with sincerity in his voice. “y/n, she just, she means a lot to me. i still really love her, you know?” 
matt couldn’t believe what he had just heard from trevor zegras mouth: an apology. one that definitely wasn’t needed seeing as the three of them were purposefully trying to get a rise out of the poor guy. pushing him to see how far he would get before seeing red. glancing over towards nate, matt made the decision to speak next. “no apology needed man, i mean we said some fucked up shit,” he addmitted, finally starting to not fear having an opinion that was different from charlie’s. “none of which was true by the way. we all know y/n isn’t boring, or her dreams don’t suck. charlie’s just jealous that she’s actually going to do something with her life and he’s going to be living off his trustfund.” 
laughter erupted from the three men in the cell, all having agreed that charlie had no future. as the laughter began to die down nate sighed before being to speak next, “look man, we’re the ones who should be sorry. you knew your limit and when to stop, but we just helped hold you down as charlie tried to beat the shit out of you. we deserved everything we got tonight.” 
trevor just barely nodded his head to agree with them both, eyes once against scanning the police station trying to find charlie. his curiosity suddenly getting the better of him and wondering why he wasn’t currently in the cell with them. “so, where is charles?” he then asked, the question hanging in the air, pushing down against his chest. because depending on what was said his whole future could be at stake. sure officer collins and shandy said mr. henderson was going to drop the charges, but that didn’t mean charlie would still try something to throw trevor under the bus. he could feel his anxiety rise because of the stituation at hand once more, being to bite his nails while he waited for an answer. 
griffin took his time while driving to the police station. mostly because he was nervous to see his big brother behind bars, but partly because he wanted trevor to think nobody was coming to help him. of course griffin knew how self destructive trevor had gotten since your break up, the entire family did, but griffin was the only one who knew how bad it had gotten. he also knew you were still reeling in different feelings towards the nhl center, as he and ava were both still in contact with you. sure, he may have resented you a little bit for what you did up and out of the blue to trevor, but he also knew you must have had a reason to do so, so he didn’t judge. that much. that’s why he had tried countless times to break his brother’s harmful habits, knowing trevor had no chance to win you back if he kept falling down this path he was currently on. that’s why he took the twenty minute route to a destination that was only five minutes away, he wanted this time in that cell to mean something to trevor. he wanted him to reflect on himself, his actions, and how much he still truly loved you, because if he loved you the way he says he does, he’d stop the drinking with or without you. he just hadn’t come to that self discovery yet. 
your father reached over and grabbed your hands, “start by forgiving yourself, y/n.” his e/c eyes that matched your own bored into the side of your head, waiting for you to turn and meet his gaze. willing you to do so, even though it was in vain. your eyes remained rooted forward, staring at your now intertwined hands. “you’re guilt ridden, and your bones are heavy with the grief of the love you once had. forgive yourself for letting it go, as your mother said earlier, you’re only human. forgive yourself, then you can forgive trevor. then you can call him.” 
“charlie’s, uh, he’s in the process of having a screaming match with his father in the chief’s office,” matt explained with a crooked smile. “his dad is pissed he started something. again. but otherwise everything’s all good and has been taken care of. matt and i are just waiting for our rides home, what about you, z?” 
the question stuck with trevor, ‘what about you, z?’ well he didn’t know what about him. he wasted his phone call on you, you hung up on him, and now he was stuck in the cell until and officer could drive him home. god what a shit show that was going to be. shrugging his shoulders he tried to appear as if he was coming off as his normal easygoing self. “officer collins is going to drive me home, nobody answered when i called home.” 
sighing griffin killed the engine of his car and forced himself up and out of his car. he knew it was wrong to let his big brother sit and rot in there as long as he did, but it felt good doing it. he kept his eyes down while walking through the front door, making his way right to the front desk. leaning over it he waited for either an officer or receptionist to come and speak to him about what he was doing here. he waited a good five minutes, slowly taking in his surroundings and trying to locate his brother, but that was proved to be invain as he couldn’t the eldest zegras sibling anywhere. “hi honey, i hope you weren’t waiting too long,” a sweet older woman smiled while sitting back in her seat. “now, what can i do for you?” 
tears stung your eyes as you looked over at your father, “how is it possible to forgive myself when all i’ve been is a horrible person in the last three years?” 
“i’m here to pick up trevor zegras.” 
trevor’s head lulled backwards as he listened to both matt and nate talk back and forth about something he had lost interest in minutes ago. eyes closing as he tried to find some sort of peace, to try and calm his murky mind. he tried to not think of you and the events that got him to this point in his life, but he couldn’t help but focus on them. starting to feel ashamed of causing himself nothing but pain from drinking every time he came home to bedford. ashamed that he was alone. ashamed he had even the slightest hope you had still wanted him, but now he knew you surely wouldn’t want him after his drunken call tonight. he didn’t even want him right now. he let out a quiet groan to himself in order to not disturb nate and matt’s rambling discussion, wishing there was a way he could separate himself as a person. so he could be the person he was before your relationship again instead of the drunken shell of a man he used to be. and then, something happened that he hadn't expected. “mr. zegras, your ride is here.” his green eyes shot open, frantically looking around for a figure that somewhat resembles you, only he couldn’t see one. officer collins was staring back at him as the cell door opened for his release. “they’re waiting for you in the lobby where you can collect your personal belongings.” 
without another word trevor scrambled to his feet and padded slowly towards the open cell, glancing back to give the two other boys a half wave as a forced goodbye before walking out. silently he followed behind the officer who had shown him nothing but kindness, through the station, taking mental notes of every person he passed praying that he would be met with your face at some point. you had to be here. you had to have changed your mind and decided to come and pick him up, otherwise how was he getting released? biting his lip he began to fidget with his fingers as officer collins opened the door to the front lobby, and what he thought would be his breath of relief turned into his worst nightmare as he came face-to-face with his younger brother. “you’re not y/n,” he breathed, voice raked with nothing but sadness. “how did - griffin?” he then asked, completely bewildered by his younger brothers presence. he knew he should’ve been grateful. he no longer had to wait out an unnnecassary stay in the prison cell, but he couldn't help the way his heartached inside his chest while meeting his brothers stoic expression as tears began to slid down his sunskissed cheeks. “y/n, she didn’t come. i thought-” he cut himself off by clearing his throat and reaching up to wipe away the tears before they fell faster than he could stop. “nevermind, it - it doesn’t matter. let’s go home griff.” and just like that he tried his hardest to bottle up his emotions once again. mind racing to think of the next time he could get his hands on a case of beer. 
m/n l/n sat quietly outside of your closed bedroom door. ear pressed against the white wood as she silently cried to herself over the heartbreak and turmoil her only child was going through. the wooden door had muffled the sounds of your father’s quiet voice, but she could still hear the combination of guilt and melancholy that was spoken with every word as he tried to reassure you that you were worthy of self forgiveness. that you weren’t the horrible person you had thought you were. she also knew that while he words were directed at you, he was speaking to himself as well. because deep down she knew your father still held guilt for putting their relationship on pause, and thought because of his actions when he was your age, this was the world’s karma by creating a similar situation with his daughter. your mother could never truly understand the pain the both of you felt, which is why she sat outside your bedroom praying to herself that you would take your father’s advice to forgive yourself. praying that after all this time he would finally forgive himself. 
“y/n,” your dad whispered with a broken smile, “i’m going to be completley honest with you sweetheart. while i don’t believe you’ve been a horrible person these past three years, i can’t give you the answers that you’re looking for.” your bloodshot e/c eyes snapped over to him within seconds. he squeezed your hands lovingly before he pulled his e/c away from your own. “i still haven’t figured out how to forgive myself for leaving your mother all those years ago. i wish i could help you the way that you need me now, but i - i don’t have the answers. because i don’t think-” he let out a solemn sigh before looking back over at you with tears in his own eyes. “i don’t think we would’ve found our way back to each other if it weren’t for that night in the emergency room. every time i tried to work up the courage to call her, i panicked. i wouldn’t allow myself to stop dwelling on the pain that i had caused her for that year apart from each other. the exact same thing you’re doing by not allowing trevor back into your live - because you can’t stop thinking about the pain you caused him. but sweetheart,” he explained with wisdom only a father would have, “this chance you have to let him back into your life? it may not come again, so it’s up to you to decide what you want to do with it before it’s too late. and you’ll know, deep down in that giant heart of yours, whether you love him enough to forgive yourself, or if you’re going to hold one mistake over your head for the rest of your life as it passes you by.” 
you forced a laugh as you stared over at him and processed his tough love words. “if i knew you weren’t right i would be so mad at you right now, dad,” you confessed as you dropped your head against his shoulder. his own finding it’s place on top of yours. there was a long beat of silence before you decided to speak again. “i’m happy you were in the er that night, dad. you and mom are my idolization of love, and i just, if it hadn’t worked out for the two of you i wouldn’t have anything to believe in.” 
this time a sad chuckle passed by his lips before he pressed a kiss against the top of your head, “kid, if it didn’t work out for your mom and me, my greatest blessing in life wouldn’t be sitting right here next to me.” 
the silence was louder than any music that girffin could’ve been chosen to play. trevor was turned to face away from his younger brother, head pressed against the glass window once again. his sliding down against it while he tried to hide his face. “so,” griffin finally worked the courage to speak, “do you want to tell me what happened that you ended up in prison and were expecting y/n to pick you up?” 
taking a breath trevor turned to face his fears which were currently in the form of explaining his downfalls to his younger brother. “it’s a long story, griff,” he whispered, reaching up to wipe away his tears once again. “one we don’t have the time for, and i’m not ready to relive.” 
scoffing griffin pulled the car over on the side of the road. “we have nothing but time, trevor!” he yelled, voice cracking as he did so. “now, i deserve an explanation as to why ava and i had to go and pick up the groceries from the middle of a parking lot. an explanation on why you ended up in prison! why you’re nose is broken, and your knuckles are beaten to shit. please, trevor, i’m your little brother, and i’m scared.” that’s when the tears started to fall down his own cheeks. “you’re scaring me. you’re scaring ava. mom, dad. so at the very least, i deserve an explanation. because three years ago you weren’t the only person who lost y/n. i lost her too. we all lost her. what we didn’t expect was losing you too.” 
the silence was so loud that both trevor and griffin heard the sound of trevor’s heart shattering into the pit of his stomach. 
“you’re right,” trevor cried while meeting his brother’s stare for the first time since getting in the car. “you guys lost y/n, just like i did, and you didn’t deserve to watch me fall apart as you have for the past three summers.” his mouth went dry as he thought of what he could possibly say next, and what his brother needed to hear in order to correct his mistakes. “but you have, and it isn’t fair. none of this is fair, because life - life like to fucking kick your ass. so i’ll tell you, but only you, griff. you can’t go running to tell ava, or mom, or dad. only you.” 
the younger brother nodded his head instantly, forcing himself to stop crying to be strong for his brother. “start wherever, i’m listening, trev.” 
taking a deep breath trevor steadied his nerves and started his story with the end. “i gave y/n’s name as my emergency call.” 
----
taking a deep breath you could feel as your world began to spiral out once again like it had two nights prior. since you’d hung up on trevor, you had listened to your father’s advice and taken the past two days to think about things once more. to see them in a different light despite how much your head told you it was wrong, in your heart you knew it was time. so after listening to his voicemail one more time, you had made up your mind. it was second nature as you started to dial his phone number, not wasting time to find his nameless contact. 
picking at your nails you waited anxiously as the dial tone played in your ears. 
it went through once.
then twice. 
finally, a third time before your call was connected.
and with a shaky breath, you breathed out his name for both you to hear.  “trevor?”
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brokentrafficknight · 10 months ago
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Fem!Sun and Fem!Neptune after the Arc?
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I don't think I know what this trio is called.
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newpartnerincrime · 18 days ago
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ER | 5x06, "Stuck On You"
"We need to extricate Dr. Carter, so Lucy, why don't you start with his beard?"
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chukys-mouthguard · 7 months ago
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fading perfection
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4.6k words
genre: angst, fluff
featuring: jack eichel x female reader
warnings: fighting/arguing, jack may or may not punch a wall
note: this is for the jack girlie’s, aka me and @icebound-imagination, and anyone else who wants to come to the jack side đŸ«¶đŸŒ - i also didn’t proof read much so i apologize for any errors anywhere
Watching the time tick down you were growing less and less hopeful that the cup would be won tonight. The dreaded fear of it all coming down to a game seven becoming more and more of a reality as the game seemed to be going in anything but Vegas’ favor.
You knew that Jack was frustrated, not just from the body language he was showing on the ice but because you knew him like the back of your hand. Having been together so long, you’d learned what made him tick. His anger bound to get the best of him in a situation like this, and you just prayed he’d pull it together for the sake of the team. The game still in reach as the Knights were only down one goal, with ten minutes on the clock being plenty of time for a miracle comeback.
Things had grown chippy as both sides were going to fight until the final whistle. Scrums ensuing after each play was blown dead, the coaches urging both of their teams to hold their composure. Not needing any penalties this late in the game.
You watched Jack from half covered eyes, not wanting to watch but unable to look away. Fixated on him as he skated up and down the ice, a battle in the corner with him and Stoney taking precious time off the clock. Fans banging on the glass urging the Knights to win the battle and get the puck to the net. Sneaky cross checks and punches being thrown out of view from the refs, Jack throwing his weight around to do anything he could to dig the puck free. His face showing how frustrated he was with the other team being able to hold the puck for so long without a whistle.
As the whistle finally blew Stoney and Jack began spitting their criticisms at the refs while Brandon Carlo stepped in to trash talk Stoney. The two of them getting into each other's faces as the Bruins defenseman gave him a cheap shot, Stoney immediately toppling over and grabbing at his forearm.
The fans booing and yelling that no penalty was called, your eyes flashing to Jack as you saw him immediately going after Carlo. He grabbed his stick without a second thought, making contact with Carlo’s chest in the form of cross check as he fell over Stoney who was still dealing with his own injury.
The refs stepped in to pull Jack away before a scrum ensued, the Bruins coming to the aid of their defenseman who remained down on the ice.
You watched as Jack was escorted off the ice versus to the box, shaking your head as you knew he had been ejected. The game was surely out of reach now as the Bruins were going to the power play for nearly the remainder of the game.
Less than a minute into the power play David Pasternak scored an empty net goal, putting the Bruins up by two. Burying your face in your hands you hoped it would make it all go away, but as you looked up to the clock you watched as the Bruins scored yet another goal on the empty net.
The fans seated around you booing, not just at the team but also at you. Jack’s name and number plastered proudly on your jacket not keeping it a secret that he was your boyfriend. And despite him often being a hero to this fan base, tonight he was surely enemy number one. His actions having cost the Knights a shot at a possible comeback. While you’d come to experience plenty of trash talk from fans over the years between Vegas and Buffalo, these comments were brutal. Simply doing your best to tune them out as you begged the clock to tick down faster.
The final horn a blessing as you darted from your seat, hurrying through the angered crowd to make your way to the family waiting area down by the locker rooms.
As you waited with the other WAGS, they could see how the game and the fans had affected you. Tears in your eyes as you knew that Jack would surely blame himself for the loss, which he surely could. His emotions got the best of him and who knows how things would’ve ended up if he could’ve just kept a level head.
The idea of Jack winning the Stanley Cup was something you’d hoped and prayed for since he’d gotten out of Buffalo. The last few seasons being some of the hardest years of his career and life. You’d seen him go through several ups, with equal if not more downs. None of it being easy. To see him getting hate. To see him be talked about negatively in the public eye. Hearing the comments that were being made constantly when a young athlete failed to meet the sky high expectations set out for him. With just as hard as things were on him, you felt it all just as much. Though never once leaving his side to take it on alone.
And to go through it again, the comments and negativity from the fans. It was difficult to simply brush it off when you know Jack is much better than the person he showed on the ice in that split second rage of anger.
He’d finally emerged from the locker room, making eye contact with you but not saying a word. No hug or holding your hand on the walk to the car, the silent treatment something you were unfortunately not unfamiliar with.
The drive home was quiet. The only sound filling the void being the run of the engine. You wished Jack would say something. Anything. Just to pretend that things were normal for five minutes before you’d have to wake up and live in reality.
The Knights had lost. The dreaded game seven that you’d hoped wouldn’t be needed is in a few days. And right now you weren’t even sure you’d get two words out of your boyfriend before then.
Pulling into the driveway you grabbed your key from your bag as you didn’t care to wait for Jack to take his sweet time unlocking the door. Needing to get inside and just feel at home, even if the house would feel empty with Jack most likely choosing to be alone with his thoughts.
You watched from behind the kitchen island as he immediately went to turn on the tv, highlights from their game being displayed. Though for the Knights they were more like lowlights.
“Can you talk to me?”
His eyes remained glued to the tv, not even looking at you when you spoke. A sigh leaving your lips as you didn’t feel like dealing with him when he was acting like this. Though it was never intentional for him to take out his frustrations on you, it still hurt when he did.
“Jack!”
“What?”
His voice echoed throughout the house as he shouted back at you, making you jump at the anger behind such a simple word.
“Will you talk to me? Please?”
“About what? I’m sorry that I’m a little preoccupied with the possibility that the league is gonna suspend me for game seven, so I don’t have time for whatever type of emotional talk you want to have right now.”
He shook his head as he tossed the remote on the table as he shut off the tv. No use in watching the recap of the game and seeing his dumb antics on replay as they discussed his possible suspension.
You were sure he’d be fine, guys did worse all the time and got away with it. But that mentality didn’t matter to Jack, as all he could think about was being the reason his team lost their shot at the cup.
“That’s how you’re going to talk to me, and treat me, after I have been by your side through everything? When you were in Buffalo and everyone was against you, I was the only one in your corner. I never once let you believe anything negative that was being said in the media. Or when you had to fight like hell just to try and get the surgery you wanted. I went with you to every meeting, every doctor’s appointment, I even spoke to the Sabres organization on your behalf to fight for you to get the surgery you wanted. I never once made you do any of that alone and now you’re going to shut me out because you chose to be an idiot on the ice tonight?”
“I didn’t force you to do any of that.”
Jack spat back at you, his voice low and almost mocking as he stood at the other side of the island. His expression was cold as he stared at you.
“You’re right, you didn’t. I did it all because I love you. I sat in that arena in Buffalo and had hateful things said to me night in and night out because I was your girlfriend and I supported you, even on your worst days. I packed up and moved to Vegas with you because I wanted to continue my life with you. So many things I’ve chosen to give up or push to the side, but I’d do it all over again and again because I fucking love you. And what type of thanks do I get? Being ignored by you simply because you couldn’t control your fucking anger on the ice.”
He smirked as he shook his head, surprised to hear you calling him out on his behavior as it normally wouldn’t be your choice to do so.
“You think I need this shit right now? The last thing I need is my girlfriend bashing me for how I acted out there. I didn’t ask for this tonight y/n!”
“Then you should’ve kept a level head on the ice Jack! I didn’t ask for half the shit that’s come to me simply for loving you and supporting you every night you step on the ice. But I accept it. And if you get suspended, then you’ll have to accept that too. But it’s not fucking fair to take your frustrations you have with yourself out on me when I’ve done nothing to deserve that.”
The two of you had closed the distance between you, Jack biting his cheek as you unloaded on him. All of your frustrations and feelings building up over the years as you’d taken on so much to be by his side. And despite seeing how hurt you were, it’s like you were talking to a wall.
“Then leave. If this is too much for you, and it’s not what you signed up for, then fucking leave. Everything isn’t going to be sunshine and rainbows all the time. This is my life, my career we are talking about. We had a chance at the cup tonight y/n and we lost. For two seconds can you realize why I’m so angry? If I can’t play next game then what? I will never be able to live down being suspended from game 7 and watching my team lose.”
Your eyes went wide as you listened to him, laughing at his words as in true Jack fashion, he was making it about himself. Not taking the time to hear you out or understand how much you willingly sacrificed to be in his corner. Not because you felt like you had to, or you were forced to, but because you loved Jack and to you it was worth the hardships.
“Leave? Don’t you realize if I didn’t want this I would’ve fucking left back in Buffalo? I wouldn’t have been trashed online relentlessly for being with you when you ended up being ‘overrated and overpaid’ and a disappointment to an organization Jack. Don’t you fucking get that? All you care about is yourself, what about how I fucking feel? Stop being selfish long enough to see how much I’m hurting!”
“Shut the fuck up!”
His voice rang in your ears as you flinched, his fist punching through the wall next to you as you stood speechless. Despite arguments being a somewhat normal thing for the two of you, he’d never once gotten physical.
Looking at the wall you immediately were afraid he’d broken his hand, the worry of him being suspended no longer an issue if he couldn’t play because of an injury.
His breathing was heavy as he looked from the wall to his hand, as if shocked at himself that he’d gotten to that point.
“Fuck!”
Shaking his hand he left the kitchen, retreating to the bedroom and slamming the door. A few muffled expletives poured from his lips as he likely was beating himself up for being so stupid.
You hadn’t noticed you were crying until the tears began to fall, hitting the skin on the back of your hand as you moved to see the damage. Tracing the hole that his fist had left, thankfully realizing he’d only punched the drywall and it likely hadn’t hurt him too bad. You shook your head, grabbing your keys as you headed out. Not knowing where you were going, but you knew you couldn’t stay there.
-
Jack woke up to an empty bed next to him, immediately concerned where you were. The throbbing of his hand reminded him of last night’s events, making him assume you had slept on the couch.
“Babe?”
He slowly walked into the room, only to see you weren’t there. Trying to recall if you’d mentioned leaving the night before, scanning the kitchen for a possible note from you. His eyes noticed the hole his fist had left, mentally cursing himself for letting his anger push him to that point.
The idea of you thinking he’d ever lay a hand on you was one he hoped didn’t cross your mind. Jack’s intentions never to hit you, he’d just wanted the fighting to stop. Not able to control his anger as it was instinct to hit something. He wondered if you’d cried when he left the room, if you were now scared of him. The last thing he wanted was to have pushed you to the point that you left.
Checking the time he realized he was running late, needing to be at the airport to catch the flight to Boston in less than an hour. He packed his suit, threw whatever clothes he could find in his duffle bag, and headed out the door.
-
“Eichs, what the hell dude?”
The boys gave him shit for being late to the plane, Jack not paying any mind as he took his seat and pulled out his phone. Checking to see if you’d responded to any of his texts, all of them unread as he switched his phone to airplane mode. Tossing his head back as he could only hope that by the time the plane landed you’d finally respond to him.
-
Jack sat in his hotel room, the conversation with you open on his phone as he kept checking to see if you’d as much as read his texts.
Nothing.
A knock soon came at his door, finally making him look away from his phone for the first time in hours. Noah Hanifin revealed to be behind it as he invited himself in, taking a seat on the bed not occupied by Jack.
“What the fuck is going dude? You’ve been quiet since you were late to the plane, your hand is fucked up and it definitely didn’t look like that after the game. Everyone is worried about you.”
Jack laid back on the bed, hands covering his face as he groaned. Replaying last night’s events over and over in his mind, trying to imagine what this present moment would be like had he not been so stupid. Had he not let his anger get the best of him.
“I fucked up Hanny. Bad. And I’m scared I won’t be able to fix it.”
Noah didn’t pry, letting Jack take his time as he could see that whatever was on his mind wasn’t something easy for him to talk about.
“Y/n and I, we got into it last night. I was being an asshole and she just, all she wanted was to get me to understand her. To know the sacrifices she’d made being with me, not by force but out of love. But, I wouldn’t listen, and I made it all about me. She called me selfish, and I got angry. So I punched the wall. I swear I never meant to do anything like that, and thank god my dumbass didn’t hit her. I’d never be able to live with myself if I would’ve been that stupid.”
“Well, you are kind of selfish Jack, if I’m honest.”
Jack shot Noah a look of confusion and frustration, though he should have expected Noah to call him on his bullshit. He was never the type to sugar coat things with Jack, and having known about the things you went through being Jack’s girlfriend, he felt it only right that he defended you.
“Jack, I don’t think you truly realize how fucking amazing y/n is. Being your girlfriend isn’t a walk in the park. This life is not easy on any pro-athletes significant other. The situation in Buffalo was one of the hardest things you’ve gone through, and she never once made you deal with any of that alone. None of the negativity being anything she signed up for willingly. But she deals with all of it, the good and the bad, because she fucking loves you dude. She rarely complains about it because what’s complaining going to do? Add to your stress or your frustrations? Of course she never wants to do that. But, you did act like an idiot last night. And I’m sure you were an asshole to her, but she doesn’t ever deserve that. She goes to bat for you, and I’m sure for once all she’d like is for you to stand in her corner for a change.”
Jack sniffled as he felt himself getting emotional at the thought of not having the chance to stand in your corner, to finally be there for you like you’d been needing.
“And trust me, if you would’ve hit her, I’d be in here beating the shit out of you right now. That’s not who you are Jack, and you need to make things right.”
Noah gave Jack a hug, reassuring him that things would work themselves out. Though itmay not be today or tomorrow like Jack would prefer. Real relationships take work, and that’s all he could vow to do. Work on himself so he can be better, for you, and for each other.
“She won’t even text me back Hanny, not sure how I’m supposed to work things out.”
“Jack, you punched a hole in the wall. I’m sure she needs a little bit more time to deal with that. I promise, you’ll have the chance to make things right. Just, put the phone down and get some rest please? We’ve got a big game tomorrow.”
-
The morning had come and gone, Jack still not as much as getting you to read his texts. He was starting to worry that he’d gone too far this time. That you’d finally stopped putting up with the difficulties of being with him, that he was too late at being able to fix things.
As he sat in his stall of the locker room, head in his hands as he tried his best to focus, all he could think about was you. How badly he wanted you to be in the crowd cheering him on. The way you always wore his name and number proud, wanting everyone to know you were his girl. He thought about how amazing the moment would be to share with you if they pulled off a win tonight.
But it had been two days, and not a single response from you had come. Jack knew he’d gone too far, punching the wall never something he could’ve imagined doing. And you had every right to be angry with him for acting the way he did. Though he’d hoped that maybe you would put all those emotions aside to be there for him tonight. Of course afterwards you’d have to discuss what happened, but he needed you now more than ever. With one of the biggest games of his career just an hour away, he wasn’t sure he’d be able to get his mind right.
He tried one last time to call you, hoping that you’d finally pick up so he could hear your voice. Tell you how sorry he was, how much he loved you. Apologize for not realizing how truly lucky he was to have you by his side.
“Hello?”
Your voice was soft on the other end, Jack almost too stunned to say anything. But he knew he wouldn’t have long, the boys already getting lined up for warmups in the hall.
“Hi, baby. Look, I don’t have much time but I’m so fucking sorry. For everything. You’re right, I was being selfish and I was wrong. I truly never meant to get angry like that, and I hate myself for putting you through that. I love you so much and appreciate you sticking by my side, even though I’m sure there were days you didn’t want to deal with the bullshit. You stayed, and I need to appreciate you more because, I can’t lose you.”
You could hear the emotion in his voice, your heart hurting imagining him getting teary eyed in the locker room for his teammates to see. Though Jack didn’t care, he needed this moment with you. His voice was desperate with the need to make it known how sorry he was.
“I know. But right now, you need to focus on going out there and winning the cup okay? Everything will be fine.”
Jack laughed, trying to pull himself together as he wiped the tears from his face, nodding his head as he promised.
“Okay, I gotta go, warmups. I love you.”
-
You’d gotten to the WAGS suite just as the lights began to dim, signaling that the starting lineups were about to be announced.
“Y/n? Oh my god! We didn’t think you were coming!”
Mark Stone’s wife Hayley running up to hug you, the other girls’ following suit. All of them happy to know you’d decided to come after the other night’s events making you question the idea.
“There was no way I could miss this, and I know Jack wants me here.”
Though you didn’t tell him you’d made the trip, wanting to keep it a surprise. Which would be even sweeter should the Knights pull off the win.
Taking your seat next to Hayley, the two of you grabbed hands as you took a deep breath impatiently awaiting puck drop.
-
With the final minutes ticking down on the clock, you and the other WAGS sprinted down to the Zamboni gates. Arena staff directing you there for easy access to the ice post-game.
You watched with tear filled eyes as the scoreboard read three goals to one, with Vegas being the team with the lead. All of you joined hands as sixty seconds turned to forty, then twenty, and soon the final horn sounded. Jumping up and down you all cheered, watching as equipment flew through the air as the bench cleared and the guys piled onto their goaltender.
The Zamboni doors opened, but you were instructed to wait until the team was given the cup to take the ice. Arena staff needed to lay out carpets as a safety precaution in the meantime.
“And now, your Stanley Cup Champions. The Las Vegas Golden Knights!”
You and the girls crowded the entrance to the ice, phones out to take photos and pictures as each guy awaited their moment raising the cup. Soon enough it was Jack’s turn, and you could feel your eyes welling with tears at the sight. Seeing the emotion written all over his face, it made everything worth it. The hateful comments from the media and fans, navigating a trade out of a difficult situation with his previous organization. Fighting so hard for the surgery he deserved and worked endlessly to research.
The ups and the down of being his girlfriend all evened out for this opportunity to see him hoist the cup. And while it didn’t erase the argument you’d had, or the fact that he’d punched the wall, it was a testament to the fact that the two of you could overcome it all.
As he passed the cup off to Noah, you watched as he scanned the crowd. His smile faded as he realized that all his teammates had their significant others to celebrate with, but little did he know you were there, and had been all night cheering him on.
And just as he was set to head off to rejoin his teammates, or find a coach to thank, he saw you. Your WAGS jacket always the easiest to spot since you went a little crazy with the gold glitter. Carefully you stepped onto the ice as he skated towards you, tears in his eyes as he pulled you into his chest. His arms not letting you go even for a second as he spun you around. Finally setting you down to pull your lips to his, his hands cupping your face as he pulled away, resting his forehead on yours.
“I’m so proud of you Jack!”
Smiling up at him as you wiped his tears, he kissed your forehead. Wrapping his arms around you again he held you tight, surely never letting you out of his sight for more than a day ever again.
“Thank you so much, for everything. For loving me, supporting me, for being my rock. For coming here and supporting me after I was a selfish asshole, and punched a fucking hole in the wall of our kitchen.”
He laughed embarrassed as you grabbed his hand, looking over the few cuts that remained.
“Yeah, how's the hand doing?”
“Feels fucking amazing lifting that cup. And even better getting to hold you again.”
He kissed you once again as you smiled, hands playing with his curls as the two of you let the chaos of celebration continue around you.
“We can deal with the hole in the wall when we get back home. Right now, this is about you. All the bullshit you’ve gone through the last few years, the bashing from the media, everyone doubting you. This is your moment. And I’m so fucking proud of you, and proud to be your girlfriend. This right here makes it all worth it, to see you come out on top.”
“No baby, this is about us. This cup is just as much for you as it is me. Without you, I wouldn’t be here. And believe me, I realize that now. Having not heard from you for two days, Hanny setting me straight, I realize now how much you mean to me. And I meant what I said earlier, I can’t lose you.”
“You’re not going to lose me Jack, I promise.”
Pulling his lips back to yours, you gave him a kiss. Savoring the moment as you knew just how special this was. Watching as his teammates chugged beers, wrapped each other in hugs, and took photos with their families.
“Now, we can finish this conversation later, but you just won the Stanley Cup babe! Let’s celebrate!”
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