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#kirsten writes again!
theautomattic · 1 year
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Kirsten in Daredevil: Born Again in a major role has been backed up by a reliable scooper! She will be working with Matt in his new firm
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kirstenonic05 · 1 year
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I can't believe I got tagged for this. Thank you @rottenpumpkin13!
Rules: post the names of the files of your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you asks with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it. If you want, tag as many people as you have WIPS.
I'm gonna tag people now and then put the WIP names under the read more because I wasn't lying when I said I have an unholy amount of WIPs!
@nibwhipdragon @idolcrescent @shadowsageingempress and anyone else who wants to do this! No pressure, though! :D
I have this many stories:
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And this many finished:
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So uh. This'll be fun. (I won't do all my WIPs but... it's still a lot...)
I think this would be a lot funnier if I took screenshots of the names/adding the pictures that are attached to the Keep notes, but there are just too many to do that. Anything in italic isn't in the title, it's just present me screaming
(Sadly all my finished fics have funnier titles since I finish crackfics in a day, and sorry for the weird formatting! I reached the paragraph cap apparently :()
Star of the Sea 2 (No name)
"What should we do with its corpse?" (Rewritten) (Two ghosts discuss throwing away a dead centipede. One throws it at the other)
Encounter with the Local Dark Mage (I only have a title... I don't even know who the characters will be yet... Why am I like this...)
Comfort (I'M A SENTENCE OFF OF FINISHING I THINK)
The Demon and the Boy (I am SO CLOSE to finishing this. Just need to edit. Might end up on Ao3)
The Dark Mage and the Dark Alchemist
I don't have a title but Sig cheers up Schezo
A New Cave???
A Len, Two Lens (Waiting on Ink to send me some of the script, collab moment)
Scarf
Also no name, smth abt Allen and Hibiya but fantasy???
The Closet's Other Door (Continuation of a fic named The Closet)
Also no name, Armani (OC)'s birthday
Photos
The Master of the Heavenly Yard
I don't want to die
Nightmare (I thought this was done...)
A Glitch's Musings (I DON'T REMEMBER WRITING MORE ECHOED TIME STUFF HELLO??)
Times Two (I wrote so much for Echoed Time and. Forgot)
Repression
No name but continuation of Joseph has a dragon spirit that goes out of control (Aurora Dragon)
Plush
No name, everyone's animal hybrids except Sonic
Sick
Interrogation
I'm so sorry Mayday (I'm so sorry for doing this to you Mayday...)
No name, Joseph post apocalypse(?)
Me, the Stall Wall, and You
Three Wings, Five (OUGH THE AU UPDATED. NOW IT HAS TO BE 7 WINGS)
You tried (That sounds so angsty without the context of Chrom walks into a Minecraft desert temple and blows up...)
Digitalis
Spin a Tale of Silk and Cotton
Chase
Isle of Destiny
Reality Check
Guardian Angel
To the Pure Body, to the Perfect Existence
Volume Control (Help how do you write sad Tsukasa)
Last One Standing
Dualheart
Different
Twist of Fate
Dimensional Scream
Before Disaster
Fighting a King
Red String
At Dawn (DD edition)
Bottoms Up
Themes
What's in a name?
Couple of Strays
Stuck in Stone
Heterochromia
City Boy Lost (Joseph gets lost: The story)
Merry Chrimpus
Tales from the Shattered Star
Birth... marks? (This was meant for Caejose week but I was busy rip)
From the Dark World
Dark Fear
Night in the Desert
So, do you like him? (Huh Joseph? Do you like him? It looks like you do)
Corrupted Code
Crumbling Stars
Hotel (My lord I was on a full SoSS spree after Frontiers, that's like 6 in a row including two others that are here somewhere)
Tension
Heads Up! (Local hedgehog yeets ghost friend's head at people)
Ridgegate Rumble (Also the name of the song I'm turning in as an assignment lol)
Redeemed Flame
Light of the Sun
Out of Known Time (Almost done...)
Swords
Carriage (The only Shrimp fic that isn't finished, set before Soggy Shrimp and Emotional Support Shrimp)
Another Life
The Ultimate
Faded Light
Wish Come Through - Wish Fall
Meeting
Aurora Dragon
Family
Reflection
Instinct
Murky Water
Land of Ice (Light, Butterflies and the Never-Ending Winter)
Refracted Invader
"Best Coffee to ever grace the earth"
The Boy
Enter: The Ripple
Skirmish Pack
At what cost?
Silence
Your Turn
Copy (OH RIGHT JOSEPH CLONE AU. I SHOULD FINISH THAT.)
A New World
Clothes
Threaded Stars (SOSS DD crossover I forgot about...)
Sugar Rush
To Turn Back Time
Arachnophobia
BOY I DIE The End (I've finished BOY I DIE the first and almost finished this one :3)
BOY I DIE the middle one (I have not started this one though...)
Yearn For Home
Wait ghosts can't-
A Totally Normal Day (Putting my OCs on a date...)
Insight
Sweet Treat
Logical Stimulus (HELP BATTLE SCENES ARE SO HARD TO WRITE. HOW DO YOU WRITE VANITAS.)
Blue Eyes, Red Stone (I forgot to finish this one sorry Nibwhip... It's the Monster Hunter JoJo fic)
Photo Ghost
Unfounded Kingdom
Two
Not so Dark
Similar (Hedgehog and Human)
Popsicles (Will be on the Caejose collection once it's done. If I finish it, of course)
Just a Familiar
Final Battle...?
Time Stops
Barista
Heart's Pulse
Immortal
Welcome to Vivosaur Island
The Heroes
Fireflies
Like Surviving the Apocalypse (OC edition)
Like Surviving the Apocalypse (AU Joseph edition)
Live Play
Aragami - 荒神
Reunion
It's Time (Kirsten finish Echoed Time fics challenge: impossible. Literally this is the beginning of the series and I STILL haven't finished it.)
Chaos Warp (OH HELLO SOSS FIC THAT IGNORES ALL THE RULES OF SOSS)
Light in the Dark
My Own Hands (Rerun)
My Own Hands
Comrades No More (Rerun)
Comrades No More (OG CitS edition)
Distorted Graffiti (It's literally just Comrades No More with a different name and they dance before killing each other... what the heck past me...)
Winter Wonderland
The Supernatural
【End of Days】 (Kirsten don't write the end of the AU before the start challenge: Impossible impossible)
Midnight Dancing
Arena (I think I never finished this because the characters changed names 3 times during writing lol)
Learn to Dance
Ruins Deep
How to say "I love you" (Learn to dance from Caesar's POV)
Tsunami
Snow Tower
Phone
Time, again and again
Heart Burn (Probably gonna split this into 4 different oneshots ngl)
Cast Away (I THOUGHT I FINISHED THIS D:)
Eternamax
Cute? (Not in the way you think)
Mission
Jail of Burning Hell (An actual mission name from Sonic Adventure. How.)
Treading the Needle (I wrote the start to OG CitS and never finished it, then proceeded to write everything in between and the end. Ok me.)
Legendary Heroes II
Beautiful One Day
Lock
Table Tennis Table (OH RIGHT THE JOSEPH AND SONIC BREAK A TV AND ALLEN IS DISAPPOINTED FIC. I NEED TO FINISH THIS.)
Brioche (I have like 3 fics named brioche. Which fic is this.)
Braving Lightning
Meet the Ghosts
Rift Token Pendent
Joe's Diary 2
Zombies at Port
Zombies at Port (Dream accurate) (Technically done?)
The Start of Origins
Beast on World's End (The day I figure out how to write DIO, the day I will finish this fic)
Shuniji (EotD version)
Shuniji (Minecraft accurate)
Lunch
Mice on Venus
Anigame
Anigame 2 (Kirsten name your fics-)
Ridgegate Rock (OG CitS version)
Night Market
Arrival (i wrote this playing Stardew) (The previous brackets is actually in the title...)
Butterfly House (Valentines 2021) (NOOO I NEVER FINISHED THIS D:)
Water's Edge
Turtle Beach
Allen, Joseph, and the Mizutsune (I need to. Finish this.)
Streak of Lightning
Guest
(Not So) Secret Island
Son of a Champion (Nuzlocke gone wrong not clickbait)
Kars' 100% Accurate Retelling of Meeting Joseph (It's not accurate)
Through Ghost Eye
Dance of the Decorous
March of the Profane (So I made this challenge where I wrote two fics at the same time (This and Dance of the Decorous) that share the same amount of sentences, and chose two songs that are the same but remixes as the titles. I wanna continue these fics sometime cause I'm kinda proud of them ngl...)
Purest Sky and Sea (Started this with Ink and. Forgot abt it)
Wrong Seat, Right Timing (Ink and I have to finish this! :D)
Blue on the Run
Dawn (Another fic named Dawn??? It's... Stardew???)
Temporal Rift (THIS WASN'T EVEN TAGGED AS STORY I JUST STUMBLED ACROSS IT WHILE TRYING TO FIND SMTH. HELP I MIGHT HAVE A LOT OF FICS I'M MISSING)
Shadows on the East (This is one of my most important fics and it wasn't tagged as story...)
Up towards the sky (I wrote a Caejose New Years fic??? What??? When???)
Where it all went wrong
Poffins (Continuation to Underground on Ao3!)
Eye of Memory
Sunflowers Spring Forth Day
~ℜ𝔢𝔴𝔯𝔦𝔱𝔢~ Bluebells Sound Death
Sunset Orange (I think I've written more oneshots for this AU than the actual main story...)
Sunrise Yellow
EC x SDV (Aka Boredom/Commas everywhere) (I REMEMBER THAT I COULDN'T FINISH THIS BECAUSE IT WENT OVER THE GOOGLE KEEP WORD LIMIT LOL)
The Mystery of the Two Pranksters
Lost Memory
I know who you are (Well that's not cryptic as heck)
Token
Dreaming of Shooting Stars
Dreams (3 SoSS fics in a row again. Huh.)
Love?
Name
Nest
Golden Friendships
No name, Eye of the Sea intro for EotD
Who are you?
Valentines (ANOTHER VALENTINES FIC???)
Stairwell (This was a story where anything stupid that happened to me at this stairwell would be rewritten with characters but... I'm not at that school anymore... this might be finished...)
Full
Orchid
The Legendary Wolf Likes Coke (COCA COLA. NOT COCAINE)
America? (America is not real)
JOeStar rEcreation: Project Hamon (J.O.S.E.P.H ;) )
Rain under the Trees
It feels like midnight
The Revolution Comes Around Again
Before I say goodbye to you
Collab Story
The end of the 10 year story (10 years irl)
Null
Rumours
The Mentor Servant's Name
Who's She? (Sounds kinda angsty but it's not... It's SoSS)
Shadows of the Past (White Deal)
Scarf (OH LOL I'VE USED THIS TITLE TWICE)
Sea of Fire
Visit
Left in Ruins
The Concept of Love
A little spider goes a long way (Eden why did you name the spider that) (My friend named a spider Joseph and then we talked abt it and a crackfic spawned...)
Safari Zone
Another
DD rewritten
Around the World
One and the Same
Royalty is not for us
Entralinked
Servant of the Worlds
The Evillious Chair
Why does a flaming arrow hold a curse instead of killing the victim straight away?
Strengths and Weaknesses
Christmas Snack
Happy birthday Sonic!
Back in Time
Blossom Storm
Hanahaki
A day in the life of the Kagamine/Lucifin Twins (TYPO SPOTTED. IT'S SPELT "LUCIFEN")
Tricksters in the Lucifenia Palace
Slice of Life - Ancestral Bonds (I'm 100% sure there's a continuation to this somewhere that's unfinished but I can't find it...)
As Faith Foretold
Dimensional Defenders - 1 (My first ever fic!!! Wow!!!)
Experiment TS-#042 (Sad that I didn't get far in this, I had so many ideas for this AU as a kid)
Mirai
A day in the Lucifenian Castle
Len's Adventures at Gakupo's Sushiria (Collab with my friend, who wrote Miku's Scooperia)
Tuna why did you make me do this you peckneck smh (Speaking of said friend...)
Shattered Mirrors
One
Through the desert's flames
Pocky
Earthen Guardians
Ships on a Spaceship (There are 3 separate stories for this, and 2 more planned. Why would I do that to myself)
Azure Gold
Azure Wind (These two fics are not related to each other. Azure Gold and In Love with a Wyvern are. What.)
Mirror Cave
In love with a wyvern
New World, New Beginnings (JOJO MINECRAFT ISEKAI FIC I WROTE AND FORGOT ABT??? HELLO???)
Lab AU??? (The AU has a name y'know, past me)
Among Us there are Two (Part 3) (ONE DAY I WILL FINISH THIS)
Cookies
And that's all! If you made it this far, thank you for dealing with my disaster!
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throughthebluesea · 11 months
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Caught Between Pink and Blue
pairing: bada lee × swf2 crew leader!reader x kirsten dodgen
word count: 1.44k
den's notes: this is from the prompts listed by @nimixe, and i've been contemplating if i'm gonna write to this, but... i hope i did justice to the prompt, madame. 💪🏻 once again, not proofread! leave your thoughts, and thank you in advance!
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there's already hype with the leader class mission since there's a growing tension between three of the leaders, namely bada lee from bebe, kirsten from jam republic, and you, leader of empireon. both leaders are known for their choreography and overall stage presence.
it's not like you dragged yourself into the said tension. you just happened to be there, a lost cause, like what your members always say.
just a quick backstory, it all happened when the empireon crew entered the fight zone last, the crews' eyes are on you, their leader. your strong physique yet elegant vibe captured everyone's attention.
empireon became the talk of the town for their diverse line-up. although you shine among them all, your crew members were known in their genre. hana for locking, doa for afro, felicity for krumping and vogueing, samara for freestyle, and sora for choreography.
of course, you were known for your diverse genre styles but mainly focused on choreography, tutting, and wacking. (mannequeen members knew you because you've been one of the judges of the contests they joined at.)
ling would gush over their leader that your vibe is almost similar as monika from the previous season, and their fellow competitor, bada lee. the members of team bebe had the same sentiments. although both leaders said nothing and just eyed at their competitor.
their thoughts eventually changed when the no respect battles started and you were selected as their no respect dancers and entered a lot of battles and succeeded in all those battles.
"i like y/n... she's got style and sass." kirsten said to her members, and latrice just eyed her with a small smirk, surprised (and not that surprised) that their leader suddenly expressed interest over their competitor. "well, i gotta agree with you, kirs. she's not all talk, she shows stuff."
"we're all on a shoot break so why not approach her? she seemed pretty chill, plus i heard she's nice even though she's provoked." audrey suggested. the rest of the jam republic dancers agreed.
same goes with team bebe, where they were pushing their leader to approach you. bada is flustered watching you from your recent no respect battles. the diverse styles you show, the facial expressions you used. even flirting with the other dancers when they started to flirt.
"do it for us, unnie!" sowoen pushed the older towards the location of your crew. bada scowled at her mischievous students, but she knew she can’t say no since they rarely make requests, and she is interested with you, as well, so she fixed her cap and approached the said leader.
both kirsten and bada were surprised to see each other in front of the empireon crew's bleachers. they grew suspicious of each other's whereabouts, but they knew you were part of it. they're having this staring contest, and their crew members were watching this 'drama' unfold. they find it amusing that you were just sitting with your back in front of bada and kirsten, having no idea that there's already tension behind your back.
hana, one of your formidable crew member were the first to notice the presence of the pink and blue leader behind your back. she nudged doa, another empireon crew member, who took notice of the tension behind their leader. she nudged you, and you looked at her, confused. she points behind you, and you finally turn around to see the two.
you were the one to break the staring contest. you flashed your smile at the two, and they tried their best not convulse on the spot.
okay, back to the present time. bada's choreography was chosen for the leader's mission. all nine leaders are warmed up, but there's kirsten and bada glancing at each other and towards your direction.
the other crews began to notice the glances and the growing tension.
"i heard both bada-ssaem and kirsten voted for y/n-nim's choreography when y/n-nim and the others voted for bada-ssaem's..."
"omo?? that's so interesting! i heard they both approached y/n-nim during the no respect battles..."
"what is this love triangle....."
everyone's eyes are on the trio now, and their respective crew members are squealing on the sides.
nob took notice of what's happening, and casually slides in your side. "y/n, how does it feel to have THE bada lee and kirsten dodgen pursuing you?"
you're not sure what to answer either. sure, both leaders are so charismatic and both known by their colorful resume in the dance industry, so it was hard for you to answer such simple question.
you're slightly honored? and at the same time there's pressure, since you have to choose one between these lovely women in the end. she had to erase the looming thoughts first, and she had to focus on the main dancer battle for the leader's class.
the main dancer battle was intense. each of the leaders danced to bada's choreography with their own flavor. the dances were done in batches, and you're in bada's batch and when it's time for you to dance, you made sure that you go all out.
when the judges announced there would be a reaudition for the main dancer, everyone cheered when both you, bada, and kirsten were called, along with akanen and lia kim.
the battle begins once more, and everyone is freaking out, going all out with the cheering for their beloved leaders.
the judges announced yet another call for re-audition. this time, the crowd went nuts when they called your name, bada's, and kirsten's.
"is this the battle of the century? the love triangle's final dance?!" cera screamed as she shooked redlic.
"nah, this ain't a battle for the main dancer, this is a battle for y/n-nim's attention." yoonji added.
"oh to be fought over by bada and kirsten..." yeni cho sighed and shooked her head, making haechi and baby sleek snort at what she said.
you looked glanced at them, shocked that they're both looking at you, as well. there was a tinge of blush on your face after getting all this attention. this is not how it's supposed to be, you just wanna dance and prove everyone that empireon is as strong as the other crews, garner attention and be the top crew.
you sure didn't expect that two of their leaders started to pursue you and your attention.
bada raised her hand, to which daniel approached immediately and gave her the mic.
"before the reaudition starts, i just wanna add something..." she begins, and all the crews went quiet for a minute. "whoever wins the main dancer position, y/n has to go out with for a date." she says firmly, and everyone goes nuts once again.
you watched the tall female in awe, you were speechless. kirsten seemed to like the idea and lifts a thumbs up.
monika then grabs her mic, and looked at the three with an eyebrow raised, "and what if y/n gets chosen as the main dancer, then?"
bada didn't hesitate, "then it's y/n's choice on who is she taking out on a date. it's either me, or kirsten."
"IS THIS STILL STREET WOMAN FIGHTER??" the girls screamed.
monika nods, satisfied with her answer. "so i guess... good luck, y/n-nim. and may the best dancer wins?"
you were a blushing mess at this point, who would've thought you'd be in this situation right now?
both dancers find your current state adorable. the shift on your movements due to your flustered state makes it interesting for them to watch.
"may the best dancer win?" kirsten said to bada, and the latter just smirked. "oh, yes." she answered.
the three began to dance once smoke plays again, dancing with all their stamina and sass. when the "i'm gonna smoke you" part comes in, both bada and kirsten approached you in the middle, doing their best to gain your attention, and you just dance with your lower lip stuck between your teeth. you find the two amusing, but still you're surprised that these two is really fighting for you through dance.
you three did your ending poses, and the whole studio erupted with cheers and screams.
the judges are in a dilemma right now. all three did so well, but they have to choose only one. there was also added pressure since your date with either bada or kirsten is also on the line.
"the main dancer we have chosen is..."
all the dancers were on the edge of their seats for the results.
and when mike song said the final name they chose, everyone is in shambles. there was a lot of screaming and cheering.
there were grins on their faces, and their eyes are on you.
mike song mentioned your name as the main dancer for the leader's class.
daniel steps forward, and asked the golden question.
"empireon's y/n l/n. between bada from bebe and kirsten from jam republic, who are you choosing as your date?"
"first of all... i am honored. and second, these two women are lovely, talented, and beautiful in their own way. if i were to choose one, it will be...."
you mentioned your choice, and the crowd went wild. both leaders were smiling from ear to ear, satisfied with your choice.
- fin.
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den's additional notes: who might be the lucky girl??? 👀👀👀 i'll leave the last part to your imagination. 😌🫶🏻
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woniverse-writes · 1 year
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"Moth to a Flame (part 5)"
Bada Lee x Reader
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part 4 ⟵ part 5 ⟶ part 6
series masterlist
summary: y/n l/n is the youngest team member of Jam Republic, competing in the second season of Street Woman Fighter. she’s got the sweetest smile and the most vibrant personality, but she also may or may not be the biggest hothead on the show when it comes to defending her teammates. apparently that’s attractive to Bada Lee.
word count: 6k
warnings: swearing, angst, y/n is a little psycho asshole in this chapter, but like- bada.... eeh scary, a lot of plot changes cuz I like playing the victim lol, not proofread, ending was kind of rushed, nothing i write is a reflection of anyone's true character and is a work of total fiction
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Shortly after Rie Hata’s message finished playing on the monitors all teams wrapped up their fun and began heading back to the studio to begin preparing for the mega crew mission. They all dry their hair and get changed, reapplying their makeup to prepare for filming again, when the host appears with another message. He congratulates the remaining teams for surviving, and at the mention of Tsubakill’s elimination y/n and the rest of Jam Republic immediately frown. 
Daniel continues to explain the mission and informs them that there will be three different concepts that they have to use, but the way they will be decided is by group discussion. On top of that team Bebe has the benefit of going straight for whatever concept they want without discussion. The three creative prompts consisted of ‘outdoor’, ‘structure’, and ‘all gender’. 
“Ooh we could definitely do something sick with structures” Audrey perked up and her partner-in-crime nodded in agreement before speaking
“Yeah but honestly I think we could do well with any of these…” y/n countered smirking cockily prompting Emma to hum and hold out her hand for a high five.
“I personally feel like we should go for outdoors. I already have so many ideas for what we could do and I know some of you do too…” the leader chimed in, eyeing Ling and Y/n at the mention of other members having ideas. They decide to have their three creative directors be Kirsten, Ling, and Y/n and the three begin coming up with their own separate ideas, with the help of another member. 
When the crew came back together after a few moments of planning and creative briefing, they all shared their ideas. Kirsten came up with the idea of showcasing the beauty of New Zealand since it was most of their crew’s homeland- she wanted to shoot on the beach and have the rocks behind them. Ling’s idea was to take more of an approach that would appeal to their Korean audience, by incorporating more K-pop dance styles and music and shooting in the heart of the city with all the lights in the back. Everyone really liked both ideas, but y/n’s quickly became their favorite when she explained it.
“Okay so this might be too much, and could easily get muddled- but what if we did a sports theme? Like- we each represent a different sport or activity while also representing our culture or background… each of us could get a highlight and we’d all have our “teams” that would dance in our own styles- then we’d all come together in the end as a sort of pep-rally type thing…” y/n finished off the basic ideas of her take, and everyone immediately either nodded or clapped, thoroughly impressed with how quickly she had come up with such an elaborate idea.
“And this is exactly why you’re here girlfriend- forever a genius…” the leader nodded and smiled at her youngest, clapping her hands slowly and appreciatively. It was an idea that could work with all three concepts so the team decided to mark y/n’s as the top choice as of right now.
When all the teams gathered to pick their concept Jam Republic and Bebe were the only groups that chose something other than ‘structure’, Jam Republic sticking to their outdoor idea and Bebe going with the all gender category. After the pink team explained why they picked what they did, it caused Deep n Dap to change their pick to outdoor as well, saying it was because they felt their crew could easily rival Jam Republic, which caused Kirsten to maturely and professionally nod, while y/n covered her mouth and snickered.
After Jam Republic has guaranteed themselves a spot in the outdoor concept, they head back to their team hideout and begin to plan out their ideas in full. Y/n already begins to map out choreography for her and Ling’s sections, while Emma does the same for herself and Audrey, leaving Kirsten and Latrice to pair up. The girls decided to head back to New Zealand and take advantage of the scenery as part of the expression of their members’ culture. It was a nice blend of y/n and Kirsten’s concepts. 
______
Y/n and Bada hadn’t really talked much since they began preparing for the Mega Crew mission, both focusing on their team’s success. Although they still texted daily, sometimes it was only a quick good morning or goodnight, while other times they had fuller conversations.
‘Have a safe flight, text me when you land plz!’ y/n read the message right before she got on the plane. She felt her heart swell at the little gesture of care, hearting the message and replying with a selfie of her in the airport paired with the words ‘thank you lovey, I will <3’.
Jam Republic boarded their plane and took off from South Korea to New Zealand, with many plans already going wrong as soon as the plane was in the air. You see, they had just been informed of how bad the weather was in the area, then about how many of the dancers they called for wouldn’t be able to make it. Each member was responsible for contacting and securing 10 members to come dance with them, explaining how the show would be paying for their trip and all the dancers had to do was show up and give it their best. It started off really well, with each of them actually coming back with more than 10 dancers. Then the weather hit. Flights were canceled or delayed to the point where people wouldn’t make it in enough time to learn the dance. On top of that, their idea to shoot at the beach was totally scrapped due to the intense winds. With the major setbacks of losing over half their dancers and not being able to use their original scene, the girls had to redo choreography and practically start the whole project over.
“This can’t be happening…” y/n was the first to start spiraling, ever the drama queen- but this time it was very justified. All six members of the crew stood in a circle in the middle of the studio floor, eyes flitting back and forth between each other and their leader, who was staring at the floor deep in thought. Kirsten let out a huge sigh and crossed her arms tensely.
“I’m sorry girls… but I really don’t know what we’re gonna do…” the leader ran her hands down her face and let out another deep breath, turning away for a moment with her hands on her hips. At that moment, the youngest realized how serious the situation really was, seeing as her leader wasn’t presenting her usual calm self. Typically when there was an issue, Kirsten was calm, cool, and collected- even if it seemed unsolvable… she always had an answer no matter what.
y/n being the perfectionist she is, began racking her brain for any possible solutions, already feeling her lungs begin to collapse at the possibility of complete failure. On top of being a perfectionist, the young girl also had a pretty bad case of savior complex, feeling like she had to fix everyone’s problems, especially when there was no one else who could- even if she knew that she herself probably wouldn’t be able to fix it either (at least not without bending over backward and bleeding herself dry). 
“No… no we can easily fix this-” all eyes went to the youngest member who ran off to grab all their notebooks and bring them back over to where the crew still stood. She spread them out, riffling through the pages until she found ideas they could use. 
“We can still use the stadium… it won’t be as grand of a scale as we wanted, but that can still work. And- and we can make it related to New Zealand instead of all of our different backgrounds, so it’s easier to put together and less choreography to make up… we can fix this!” y/n was frantically and hopefully (delusionally) explaining her ideas, trying as hard as she could to bring the team’s morale back up. They sat down in their circle and began connecting the ideas, just hoping for the best at this point
Even though the Jam Republic girls were frustrated, they only let it fuel their will to work even harder. It crushed y/n a little to have to scrap her idea, knowing it would’ve brought them an easy win, but she was determined to make their new routine strong. The team had ultimately decided to keep the athletic theme but changed it quite a bit to highlight rugby which was a big part of New Zealand culture. The girls planned on dancing in the bleachers and on the field to portray a Friday night lights feel, or a game- since it technically was still a competition between them and deep n dap.
A few days go by and it isn’t getting any easier for Jam Republic. As much as they try to stay positive, the insane lack of dancers makes it hard to achieve the impact they’re going for. Y/n kept saying how they needed to keep trying to find more dancers, but Kirsten just wanted to focus on perfecting the routine with what they had. The young girl also kept mentioning little ideas and elements to add in order to amplify the concept they were going for, but again the leader was more focused on solidifying the present piece. Y/n ended up getting so frustrated that she would just randomly start tearing up and crying during their breaks, not allowing herself to stop for more than 30 seconds, grabbing a quick sip of water, and then immediately going back to practicing. She thought that maybe if she gave it her all, she wouldn’t be as disappointed in herself when she wasn’t satisfied with the outcome. 
Of course, all of the girls were on edge but they at least were able to put it aside at some moments, still being able to enjoy parts of the process. y/n tried her best not to let her teammates see how anxious and worked up she was, but the girl was so overwhelmed with fear of failure that it would be impossible for anyone not to see it. Which is why it made everything so much worse for her when she continued to go through the rest of the preparation without a single person asking what was wrong. Y/n understood- really, she did. Everyone needed to focus on the end goal, and that meant there wasn’t time to deal with her feelings.
Bada was beginning to worry, seeing as the last response she had gotten from y/n was days ago. The girl had landed her flight and texted the Bebe leader immediately, letting her know she was safe, but also explaining the problems that had already arisen. They talked briefly about how the pink team was likely going to have to restart everything if the weather didn’t ease up. Then a couple of days later, they talked on the phone about the complete concept change and reboot of their whole routine. Y/n tried to keep her stress to a minimum, not wanting to be a burden to the other girl who was also beginning to get stressed. 
It had been many days since then, and she’d texted the younger girl three separate times as well as tried calling her twice. Bada finally got a response the day before Jam Republic would be flying back to Korea for the midterm mission check, where they as well as the other teams would be reviewing each other’s practice videos of the choreography. It had been a somewhat longer text message reading ‘hi. I’m really sorry for not responding at all for the last few days. I know you’re probably just as stressed as i am, so I’m sorry for not being able to be there. Things haven’t been going good over here and I’m honestly really scared to present what we have… but I’m sure everything will be fine haha. How have you been?’
Bada felt her heart clench at the girl’s words, understanding why she wasn’t responding but still feeling a bit upset nonetheless. It hurt her to see y/n try to brush off her stress and redirect her attention so it would focus on caring for others instead of caring for herself.
Jam Republic arrives back in South Korea and heads straight to the studio to film their reactions and judgments of the other teams. They immediately make their way to their pink hideout passing by other crews, but not having time to mingle or really do anything more than smile and wave. The girls were exhausted from the flight, jetlag, and overworking themselves. y/n didn’t even realize team Bebe wasn’t with the rest of the crews when they passed through the lobby.
Bebe sat in their room, feeling more anxious than usual, a bad vibe floating through the air. No one could quite put their finger on it, but something definitely wasn’t right and it was causing all of the members to feel its effects. It officially came time for all crews to review each dance practice video. Each team’s video played one by one and the members had time to fill out the review cards before moving on to the next. 
Bebe’s video played next and the reactions were not positive, to say the least. Everyone seemed disappointed by the piece as a whole, expecting something much bigger- the music was too big of a risk, the props were poorly utilized, and it was overall just too simple. It wasn’t a bad video- it just didn’t meet anyone’s expectations since they were all waiting for some elaborate project, knowing Bada was very capable of doing so. Shortly after, a similar reaction was felt while everyone watched the Jam Republic video.
“They don’t have enough people…” Mina Myoung was the first to observe the team’s lack of crew members. They even paused the video to count how many were shown, seeing 28, which was under the minimum limit of 30 people.
“It honestly isn’t powerful enough… it’s just not impressive” Buckey commented, crossing her arms over her chest. Yoonji sighed and frowned.
“This is so sad… I was really rooting for them” The girl mumbled, genuinely feeling pity for the international team, hoping they’d be able to pull through.
When it came down to voting for the team that should be eliminated, Jam Republic ultimately chose Bebe. They were originally tied between voting for Bebe and Wolf'lo, with y/n fighting her best fight to vote for Wolf'lo because it just didn't look entertaining to her and they had no story or plot.
"y/n…" Kirsten started off in a warning but gentle tone
"We can’t just not pick Bebe because of you and Bada… this is a competition babe." and y/n was kinda hurt by that because she knows how to be objective and she didn't even think she was biasing Bebe- she just personally didn't like Wolf'lo and thought they should be eliminated over any other team.
Then it finally came down to the results. Each team would be given a scorecard showing the comments and feedback they’d received from the others. One card would reveal the team voted as most likely to place first, and another would reveal who was most likely to be eliminated. When Jam Republic opens their card, it felt like all of the air suddenly got sucked out of the room. 
“God DAMN” Audrey laughed humorlessly in absolute shock, as they all stared at the words ‘MOST AT RISK FOR ELIMINATION’ in big bold letters at the top. y/n stopped breathing for a few seconds and she’s pretty sure everyone else did too, seeing as there was not a single sound to be heard in the dressing room. The young girl once again tried to convince herself to think rationally, but couldn’t get past the anxiety and crushing weight of failure that was starting to fill her lungs. She wasn’t even angry, even though she should’ve been because she understood. y/n understood that they didn’t meet the criteria, and their dance simply wasn’t as put together as it should've been, especially in comparison to other teams/
What really got her emotional was realizing that Bebe- that BADA- voted for them too… it felt like such betrayal and she wore that shit on her face like usual. But still- she didn't feel angry, just betrayed and heartbroken, and really fucking disappointed. The more mature and logical side of y/n was still trying not to jump to conclusions because maybe it wasn’t Bada that decided… Maybe it was the same situation her team had going on- maybe Bada didn’t want to vote for Jam Republic but the majority of others did. Y/n truly did understand everyone’s reasoning, but that didn’t make it hurt any less, especially having Bada vote to eliminate her as well
“It’s gonna be okay lovey… I promise” Kirsten wrapped her arm around the youngest’s shoulders and whispered reassuringly to her as she watched her begin to have a mental breakdown. Moments later, the rest of the crew’s ranking was revealed, showing 1 Million in first and Jam Republic in last, but also- Bebe in sixth, the second to last place. Seeing this, Bada sighed and began to have her own slight mental breakdown.
Some teams celebrated their rankings while others sat quietly, reviewing the feedback and pondering what to do. Jam Republic sat in silence as Kirsten read over the comments. Y/n sat by her side with her head in her hands sobbing silently, so overwhelmed that she didn’t know what to do. The entire team was at a loss, and soon Kirsten started crying too, wrapping and arm around the youngest members, who finally let her emotions be shown to her team. The loud cries were the only sound in the room.
Y/n was able to calm herself down after about 20 minutes of crying. The poor girl felt so awful about how things were going feeling responsible for a lot of it- thinking that maybe if she had pushed her ideas a little more, or gotten in contact with more people, or even just tried a little harder, maybe Jam Republic could’ve done so much better. Even though she’s calmed down, tears still flow down her face without her even realizing it. Y/n was never angry at anyone else for their opinions, but now she’s feeling awfully spiteful towards herself. The youngest member was filled with so much resentment and self-hatred, that it immediately sent her into an inescapable depression.
The show writers and staff were cruel. So cruel for making these girls show off their inspiration boards and creative briefs live in front of the other teams. Each team explains their given concept and how they came up with the details to highlight what they chose. While it was much more of a relaxed environment (in the sense that there would be no feedback or ranking based on this), a majority of contestants were nowhere near feeling at ease. 
The members of Jam Republic were able to build themselves back up and put on their game faces while presenting, except for y/n. She really did try her best to not look like she was about to cry at the drop of a hat, but it was no use. The girl was simply not herself. The small girl’s usually bright and energetic personality was nowhere to be found, not once cracking even a hint of a smile- even when Jam Republic received immense praise for their ideas. She didn’t find any enjoyment in the other crew’s presentations, although to be fair she wasn’t really able to focus on them- she just sat there in a daze.
It made everyone nervous to see Jam Republic’s youngest member like this. Her members noticed that she had become even more irritable than before- but now in a scary way that genuinely had them concerned for themselves and everyone else. The girl was calm but you could just feel the rage and depression and resentment radiating off of her to the point it made chills run down your spine.
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After every crew had shared their ideas and idea boards, they were allowed to go back to head back to their hideouts to discuss any adjustments or further plans that had to be made before returning to their projects. Jam Republic had to get right back on a plane in a few hours to head back to New Zealand and somehow fix their entire routine, again.
Y/n just finished walking up the staircase leading from the fight zone to the crew lounges, when she heard someone call out her name from closely behind her. The girl turned around to come face to face with the tall leader she had been talking with for the last few months.
“Hey, are you okay? I called your name like three times…” Bada questioned worriedly, her eyebrows furrowed and head tilted as she waited for the younger girl’s response, with wide caring eyes.
“...I'm just really tired” y/n whispered in the meekest voice possible, already feeling her eyes start to sting again, but trying to cover it up with a smile. Bada sighs and pulls her into a big hug, and surprisingly y/n doesn’t burst into tears. The girl continues to try as hard as possible to keep the droplets from escaping her eyes as she squeezes them shut.
“Look… I’m really sorry” the older of the two began resting her head atop y/n’s, but the shorter one felt her body tense at the apology already not liking where the conversation was headed. y/n let go of Bada’s waist and backed away, waiting for the older girl to continue.
“It wasn’t personal… the dance was still very good, and it’ll look even better with all of the ideas planned out!” she finished, referring to how her team had voted Jam Republic as the worst crew. Y/n’s face lost any emotion she had regained, looking empty and exhausted again, making Bada’s skin prickle.
“no, I understand” was all y/n spoke, already trying to disconnect from reality to save herself from crying again or making a bigger fool out of herself than she already has. But Bada is only more upset by the reaction, seeing as y/n just doesn’t seem at all like herself. The girl genuinely looks empty inside and no one on the show has ever seen her like this, in fact- no one in Jam Republic has even seen her like this and they’re all beginning to become extremely worried about her. And even though it’s clear the small girl just needs time and space, Bada decides to keep talking 
“The vote was objective I promise, I don’t want you to think anything personally of it” At the end of the older girl’s sentence, y/n just felt the tiniest bit of a scowl make its way onto her face, feeling pissed off at the thought of someone once again thinking she doesn’t understand the concept of a competition.
“Obviously- I’m not stupid, this is a competition.” the harsh tone that comes out of the younger really throws Bada for a loop because she has never seen y/n speak to or about anyone like this- and it makes her feel sick to her stomach that her first time witnessing it is directed at her.
“I- no, what? Of course you’re not stupid! I just wanted to make sure… to make sure you knew. That’s all.” Bada started off a bit panicked and emotional but quickly was able to calm down and speak rationally, understanding the younger girl was known to have a bit of a temper. There was a long silent pause.
"did you decide on Jam Republic?" y/n asked a bit accusatorily
"Huh?" the older tilted her head, still absolutely confused about how this situation was occurring right now.
"did YOU, as in yourself, Bada Lee, decide to vote Jam Republic as the team to be eliminated, or was it someone else's idea…" There was silence for a moment before Bada sighed then pursed her lips
"We all decided-" 
"but who's idea was it? Did you even argue it? Were you even thinking of anyone else? Or did you just immediately decide and agree that my team should be the next to go?" Bada didn’t say anything as she started to get a little frustrated, but she watched as y/n just scoffed at the lack of response and turned to walk away, rolling her eyes. Bada followed her and pulled her aside, a few feet away from the outside of Bebe's dressing room
"well you voted for my team as the worst, so how is this any fair at all?" the tall leader finally let her emotions take control of her as she shot back with much less frustration than her counterpart, but still irritated nonetheless.
"because I didn't want to vote for you! I fought to vote Wolf'lo over you guys because I know you don't deserve to go home! I understand it from an objective perspective- I promise Bada, I do- but that doesn't make it hurt any less!" There were a few beats of silence before y/n continued
"and it's honestly really infuriating that you don't think I understand that this is a competition-" she finished off quieter than before but still filled with annoyance and betrayal.
"WOAH- now when did I EVER say that??" now it was Bada’s turn to blow up
 "Oh my god- you don't have to say it! You clearly think I'm just here to have fun and make friends!" y/n once again raised her voice, this time rising in pitch as well.
"Why would you say that??" Bada fired back and was immediately met with the calmest tone of voice y/n had spoken in since the argument began, and it terrified her.
"Bada- you haven't seen me as a threat once this entire competition… have you? Not to you, not to your team…" Bada stuttered for a second, completely blindsided by the argument
"where is this all coming from y/n?" the tall girl asked, genuinely concerned. y/n sighed and her eyes softened, shook her head.
"never mind" She turned and went to walk away, but Bada grabbed her by the wrist again and dragged her inside the blue team room, closing the door behind her
"you need to speak to me. You need to communicate with me what's going on right now because whatever you're feeling is totally valid- we had a rough day out there- fuck, we’ve had a rough few days, especially you- but that doesn't mean you get to take it out on me… so please tell what's wrong, so I can try to help." the older girl calmly and gently explained her thoughts and feelings to the girl in front of her, and y/n almost cracked. almost.
“I think it’s best for me to focus on the competition… building relationships clearly isn’t working out to my benefit" Her previously soft and watery eyes, had quickly cleared up within a few seconds, leaving her looking cold and unapproachable again. The response was petty and childish, y/n herself knew that, but she said to hurt Bada. 
why do you want to hurt Bada? She was apologizing, why are you making this harder? You’re being childish and proving everyone right- you’re not fit for this competition, you’re too young y/n and you don’t know how to handle things when you actually need to.
The younger girl’s internal dialogue was emotional and resentful towards herself, but for once, the expression on her face didn’t show how she was truly feeling. The anger and hatred taking over her features wasn’t directed towards the older girl in front of her, which is what anyone witnessing the interaction would assume. y/n could feel her stomach churning and her face getting hot with embarrassment. She didn’t understand why she was acting like this and didn’t know how to get herself to stop.
It felt like hours had passed before Bada spoke again and when she did it was led by an aggressive scoff.
“You can’t be serious right now…” she challenged so calmly that it sent a chill up y/n’s spine, the younger girl’s resolve finally breaking down and it became apparent that she wasn’t actually as tough as she was trying to be. Bada could see the cold glare falter for a split second, watching as her eyes became full of emotion before the younger was able to reel it in again.
“Why wouldn’t I be serious? This is a competition and the only people I should be trusting are my teammates, I shouldn’t be letting my emotions get in the way of things…” y/n responded just as calmly. If anyone else were to be present for the interaction they probably would've froze to death due to how cold the two were being.
“Next time I'll make sure to vote objectively and solely based on what I see in front, instead of trying to think about who deserves to be here more.” she finished with an empty, tight-lipped smile, tilting her head feigning understanding, and Bada let out a humorless chuckle
“God- have you always been this manipulative?” it was her turn to try and hurt the other girl. y/n’s cocky grin dropped immediately and she straightened up entirely.
“Excuse me?” the younger girl furrowed her brows and scowled again
“You heard me…” Bada replied cooly and nonchalantly as if this were any other normal conversation 
“I came to you, apologizing for what I did and your response to that is to start an argument- and THEN when you realize you’re in the wrong, you try to turn it on me?” the older girl finished, voice rising slightly
“I never turned it on you- I said how I needed to focus on the competition and stop being so friendly with everyone, how are you so self-absorbed to think that was about you?” y/n could barely even get her last word out before the other was shouting over her.
“BECAUSE IT WAS- it so obviously was a dig at me y/n, because who else are you close with? Huh??” the volume of Bada’s voice caused the younger girl to flinch, no longer being able to preserve her emotions. The tall girl took a few steps forward and leaned down, getting in y/n’s face.
“Who else can actually stand being around you…” shot after shot fired, Bada was doing a much better job at hurting y/n than y/n was doing hurting Bada. She wasn’t even thinking about how she used to tell herself that she would never be the reason y/n would be crying, and now here she is, feeling satisfied when she sees a single tear run down the girl's face. She wasn’t paying attention to how it sucked all the air out of her lungs and made her stomach turn in disgust, only noticing the minuscule feeling of satisfaction.
“I think it’s so funny how you say that, knowing damn well you get jealous any time someone even looks at me… you know better than anybody that anyone in this fucking place would love to be in your position-” and this caused Bada to let out a loud laugh of disbelief, backing away slightly before getting right back in her face
“Yeah? Then how come nobody even paid attention to you until I took notice… you know that’s the only reason you’re popular, right? If it had been anyone else, no one would’ve cared… admit it to yourself, nobody wants to be in my place y/n- they all wanna be in yours, so maybe think about how lucky you are…” Bada didn’t believe in a single thing that was coming out of her mouth, she honestly couldn’t even believe her own voice hearing how condescending and spiteful the words sounded as they left her lips. She could feel a slight ringing in her ears, part of her brain processing it as a tiny voice screaming at her to stop and that she was making a mistake. But the damage was already done.
Y/n was barely holding back tears anymore, pursing her lips and clenching her jaw did nothing to stop the flow of salty droplets from streaming down her face. Her nostrils flared slightly as she swallowed down sobs and tightly closed her eyes.
“I’m not having this conversation anymore…” she managed to get the words out without sounding horribly choked up as she turns away to leave, hand about to turn the knob as the older girl lets out another dry chuckle.
“Oh so now you wanna act mature? Let me tell you this isn’t the mature way to handle the situation anymore- you don’t know how to talk to people or resolve conflict, in fact you’re NOT confrontational at all, and are really just a scared little girl who’s all bark and no bite. You’re such a child- that’s all you are- is a FUCKING child…” it’s dead silent after Bada’s done screaming at her. Y/n turns around slowly and just stands there for a moment with a blank stare, then lets out the most dry, humorless laugh. It honestly scares the shit out of the older girl, eyes going wide and face paling, coming to her senses and realizing how fucked the situation was. 
Y/n was smiling and laughing, albeit a little psychotically, all while still crying- she had finally snapped, and Bada was terrified. The girl in front of her could easily be a danger to herself, and possibly others in the state she was in, but all the leader could think about was how there was probably no coming back from this. The younger of the two just closes her eyes and takes a deep breath before opening them and nodding at Bada with a tight-lipped smile, taking a deep breath.
“Okay” y/n smiles painfully as tears continue to run down her face- she turns around, swings the door open, and slams it shut as she walks out. The silence that followed was broken only seconds later as Bada heard the sobs that were almost immediately released by the girl who had just left.
y/n hadn’t even noticed the rest of Bada’s team standing around the corner, as she walked in the other direction to head back to her own room. Once she was far enough away, Lusher led the group quietly into their space seeing their leader sat on the couch with her head in her hands.
“Hey…” she speaks quietly, and Bada looks up with an empty look in her eyes, but tries to hide it when she realizes her team is present. Before she can even try to pretend nothing happened, the sub-leader was speaking up again
“We heard everything…” Bada sighed and felt tears pricking her eyes, disappointment and heartbreak finally taking over as she realized how fucked up the things she said were. The younger members sat around their leader and rubbed her arm or leg while they all watched with sad eyes as she sobbed. This was going to be a rough next few days.
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notes: i'm so sorry...
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yxine · 1 year
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— ADMIRE. ❞
part 1 — part 2
Bada Lee x Original Character!:
— in which Bada unexpectedly gets to see and battle her long-time idol and crush on a survival show she was in, Street Woman Fighter.
— Everyone expected that Jam Republic would be only full of western dancers, so imagine when they found out that the "Queen of Dance" in the Korean Dance industry was joining the survival show Street Woman Fighter.
note: I do not own any of the people here nor the show except for Lea Chang. This was also made for entertainment purposes only.
This is also my first time writing in Tumblr so please excuse me if there are any mistakes and I hope you like this small chapter!
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"I'm so glad you could make it!" A woman's voice called out speaking in English as she embraced the tall female figure in front of her. She was Kirsten Dodgen, a very respectable western dancers that is part of the crew that everyone knew, the Royal Family.
"Well, I wouldn't refuse an offer from an old friend." The said tall female replied to Kirsten as she hugged her back.
"I thought you had the schedule packed, especially knowing you're the Queen of Dance, Lea." Kirsten said with a wide smile on her face, excited to finally be able to dance with her closest friend again, this time as a crew.
Lea Chang, a woman with chin length hair with strands of ash blonde highlights, sharp yet beautiful features and a lean body type that looks a bit musculine, she's the definition of a woman who can melt all genders. Her dance style going far with variety types of dance, hence her title 'Queen of Dance'. Not only that, her aura was dominating, fierce and full of confidence. Her sense of style going through they oversized boy-ish clothes with rare feminine styles.
Going from one battle to another from the past and choreography being one of her strongest points these past few years, but that does not mean she can't battle anymore, no. Even if it had been years since she had battled, she still polishes her dance just incase this type of situation happens.
"Ready to meet the others?" Kirsten excitedly asked Lea who nodded her head yes. Grabbing her by the arm she led her friend to one of the dance practice rooms where the other crew of Jam Republic are.
"Ain't no freaking way!" A voiced called out as both Kirsten and Lea stepped into the room. Immediately, all three people inside stood up straight in shock.
"Lea Chang!?!"
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All teams except Jam Republic has been settled down on the battle ground. The tension was high as every crew glanced at each other in unease, it was to be expected as this was a survival show, a competition where everyone wants to be the best and show that they are the best.
Suddenly the large screen showed the logo of Jam Republic making everyone stiffen at their seat in anticipation.
"Woah, it's really Jam Republic." One of the members of Deep n' Dap muttered outloud.
"I can't believe I get to see Kirsten in person!" A member of Mannequeen also said as they waited for the crew to step down the stairs.
"I remember signing up for one of Kirsten's classes and even went up early just to see her but they said her flight got cancelled, I literally cried when I found out!" One member of Deep n' Dap whine out to one of her crew before getting shutted up by her leader.
"Sh! Stop it, this is a competition!" Mina Myoung, the said leader warned her member.
"Right! Get out!" The member said while throwing her hands out acting as if she threw something.
"Woah, this is so cool!" A voice exclaimed in amazement as they stopped by the door frame of the entrance. It was Kirsten and her crew, the Jam Republic. All five of them began talking about how amazing the set was as they walked through the large hall down to the battle ground.
"Wah, look at how she carries herself."
"So cool!"
Jam Republic stood in the middle of the stage looking at the large screen in front of them waiting for the words of the other crew.
"This is harsher than I thought.." Kirsten muttered as she heard the translation of the other crew's view of them.
"She's a fake royal family."
"Where is Parris Goebell?"
"Woah, that's really harsh." Nob, the leader of LadyBounce muttered as she sneakily glanced at Jam Republic nervously.
"She just has a pretty face, there's nothing more."
"Look at how high her shoulders are! You can't even see her pretty face!"
Two no-respect stickers for Kirsten and Lattice, six no-respect stickers for Audrey. Seeing this, Audrey cheerfully raised two thumbs up smiling widely at everyone making them chuckle at her.
"She must be thrilled."
"Thumbs up? What does she mean?"
After Jam Republic seated the lights suddenly changed before the large door revealed the mc, Kang Daniel.
"Hello. Welcome to Mnet's original dance series, Street Woman Fighter 2, and I'm your host, Kang Daniel. Not only will we see the competitions between some of the best dance crews in Korea, but we have gone international this season - with global named crews, making the competition more intense." Everyone cheered and clapped for him as he continued to explain the first mission.
"You'll fight to crush all the other crews and reach the top. Only one crew can do that. Here's the first dance battle to be the winner of this competition." This made everyone cheer louder in anticipation, Kang Daniel did a pretty good job at hyping everyone up.
"The signature of the dance series is your first mission, the no-respect battle with the weakest dancer."
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"The first no-respect battle is... 1Million Redy." 1million cheered as the hyped up Redy who was adjusting her beany and sleeves before walking up on the stage with a mic on her hand.
"The person I pick as the weakest dancer is..." Redy pauses adding a dramatic effect to the tension building up in the whole room before looking towards BEBE. "Bebe, Bada Lee."
Everyone howled in excitement for the battle as Bada the leader of Bebe only nodded her head while flipping her bottle of water before walking up the stage.
"Let's go Bada!"
"Captain you got this!"
"Kick her ass, Redy-yah!"
"I just don't respect you. That's it." Said Ready as she made a cutting motion before handing the mic to her leader.
"Bada Lee from Bebe, do you have any words?"
"Not Redy, Soobin-nah! To me you're no older than an 8th grade." Bada dissed the 1million dancer who shrugged seemingly unaffected.
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"Is the mic fine now?" A woman questioned the staff who did a last minute check up on the mic before nodding in confirmation. Sighing and shaking her arms she began to stride towards the long hallway to the stairs of the battle ground.
She was late due to the mic malfunction, turns out they gave her the wrong pair and went to find another one for the last one and a half hour. It made her a bit upset on how sloppy the new staffs are on these kind of shows now but it was done so now she was on her way to her crew.
She took a bit longer walking as she saw that the mission has already started. Redy was the first one to dance, although she must admit. The young woman was good at using the fluidity of her body but...
"There's no impact." She muttered as she slowly became uninterested with the battle until it was time for the other one to dance.
Bada, the woman knew her from all those viral tiktoks and videos all around her feed. She was admittedly very good, making iconic dances, the way she moves her body and the way you could see she enjoys what she's doing. You could say that the woman was a bit of a fan.
Seeing Bada dance personally now, was a new experience. It's better than through the screen. The quality, isolations and etc. was top notch. It made her feel something new ever since she kept watching her through her screen.
"You interest me, Bada.."
Seeing as the battle ended, Bebe gaining a win. The woman decided that it was time to head down, her clanking on the pavement. Everyone heard her coming down making them look at the stairs in wonder.
"Is there another member on the other crew?"
"Is it another judge?"
"Yah, Jam Republic is smiling do you think it's another member of theirs?"
Everyone gasped at the figure that's walking down the stairs.
"Wait hold on!"
"Are you serious?!"
"She's participating in this show?!"
"I lost! I don't wanna be here anymore!"
"There is no way that Lea Chang is battling in this show!"
That's right, it's Lea Chang. The one and only Queen of Dance. Everyone was shocked even the judges because they weren't informed by this. Was this last minute?
"Woah! This is insane!" Monika, one of the judges exclaimed in shock as she watched Lea walked down the stairs with a dominant aura that covered the whole room. To say she was a fan was an understatement. The same could be said for Mike and Shownu as they both looked up to the dancer even when she was younger than them.
"I'm getting goosebumps just from watching her alone!"
"She's so tall, taller than Bada!"
"Woah, now that's an aura of a queen."
"Which crew is she in?!"
Everyone watched as she stepped towards...Jam Republic?! Staring at her as she took a seat next to Kirsten.
"I thought Kirsten was going to be a challenge but Lea?! Lord what have I done to see such a powerful duo?" Yoonji from Mannequeen jokingly—or is she—prayed to the gods.
Lea was just sitting casually as she glanced at everyone who tried to avoid eye contact with her. She knew she was popular and scary but not this much, it made her sweatdrop awkwardly chuckling inwardly.
Her eyes landed on a certain leader of Bebe, who tried not to seem nervous as she stared right back onto the queen who has been her idol since she started dancing. Lea noticed how nervous Bada must've looked because she smiled at her—well it looked like a smirk— making her flustered and look the other way.
This made Lea chuckle at how cute the Bebe leader was before settling down her gaze somewhere.
This show might be more interesting than expected.
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theblogwithoutfear · 2 months
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karen page is so annoying in the show...is she better in the comics somehow or is she just like that
So I've actually wanted to talk about this forever, but I kept forgetting to make a post about it. Your ask is a perfect opportunity to write down all my thoughts. Brace yourself, because I have a lot to say. Sorry in advance lmao
I actually prefer Karen in the show. To be fair, I have not finished all the comics, but so far I think her TV counterpart is a lot better (I still like her a lot in the comics tho, don't get me wrong). The NMCU version of Karen Page also has a lot of Kirsten McDuffie (another comic book girlfriend) in her, which is great in my opinion.
A lot of people find her annoying, but to me it's her flaws that make her such a fantastic character. She isn't a caricature, stock-girlfriend character pulled from a box of tropes; she's a well-rounded individual, extremely realistic, a mirror of Matt Murdock, and a woman with real agency. Her actions have major consequences on the plot. In my opinion, a lot of superhero girlfriends (in comics, movies, TV, whatever) are written more like props than characters, and they don't have any agency or actual plot relevance. Which is why, when a lot of them die, their deaths feel so cheap and inconsequential. That's where fridging comes from. It's been a problem with superheroes since their very inception; and a problem in storytelling at large. So often in fiction, women are flat and unrealistic.
So to me, Karen's heavily-flawed character is refreshing. She is extremely impulsive; she's deeply intelligent, but makes such stupid decisions; she can be hypocritical, self-destructive, and petty. Sometimes she manipulates people, even unintentionally. She's very well-meaning, but constantly makes mistakes. And it's these mistakes that move the plot forward, and reveal important things about both her and Matt. Her actions have real consequences for the story, and she undertakes her own journey throughout the narrative. She is almost as much a protagonist as Matt is, in terms of her character development and growth.
For that matter, every one of the flaws that I listed are things that Matt does too. They are almost perfect mirrors of each other; people who are immensely concerned with justice and compassion, people who care for the truth, and people who want to make their city a better place. However, as they go about it, they stumble and make mistakes and endanger other people. They're hypocritical and contradictory and impulsive. They constantly have to call their own moralities into question, because they almost never live up to their high ideals.
(Also, as a side note, I think many of Karen's flaws—as with Matt's—come as a direct result of all the trauma she's been through: her mother's death, her brother's death, her alcoholism and drug addiction, her dad cutting her off, being framed for murder, almost getting murdered in prison, etc. So I think it's fair to give her some grace.)
But what makes both Karen and Matt so lovable, imo, is that they keep trying. No matter what mistakes they make, they get back up and try again. They do everything they can to atone for the blood on their hands.
I think also (and I'm not accusing you of this, just a certain subset of people in the fandom) that people are more willing to accept Matt's flaws than Karen's—because there's a lot of misogyny built into our society, and there's this ingrained idea that women have to be paragons of virtue. Women, both in fiction and in reality, tend to be put under a microscope and dissected, while men can get away with a lot more. So Matt and Karen have identical flaws, but only Karen gets hate for it, which makes me very sad.
It may be the writer in me, but imo flaws are what make a character—and a story—meaningful. A well-flawed character can take a ridiculous, implausible story and make it feel grounded and real and impactful. A well-flawed woman even more so. I love Karen for the same reason I love Jessica Jones and Wanda Maximoff; or, to go beyond Marvel, for the same reason I love Jo March and Katniss Everdeen and Miss Haversham and Katherina Molina. They all elevate their respective stories beyond the initial premise and plot. Flawed female characters are realistic and impactful, and therefore empowering.
Obviously, to each their own. Some people just find her annoying and don't like her personality, and that's fine. But for me, that's what makes her feel real, and that's why I love her.
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ssivinee · 1 year
Text
✧In Control✧
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Jam Republic! Kirsten Dodgen x Idol! F Reader: You were the famous soloist, Han Y/n, and held a complex reputation for yourself, but that doesn't stop Mnet from inviting you as a guest judge on Street Woman Fighter 2. You didn't know much about the foreign dancers, but this one caught your eye.
Word Count: 4.8k
Note: I toooootally didn't struggle while writing this🥲
Character Vision Board
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Being in the limelight was always familiar territory to you. It was something you were always bound by due to your sister being one of the most notable actresses in the acting industry today. Your older sister, Han Sohee, had always been popular with everyone. Her authoritative and sophisticated qualities had everyone on their knees, adoring her existence. With releases like “My Name” and “Nevertheless” on Netflix, your sister has been recognized for her talents worldwide. You couldn’t have been more proud of your sister's mind-blowing career, always supporting it in any manner.
You, on the other hand, had your fame in the music field. The Han Y/n began as a soloist under Pnation and had a significant fanbase, mainly consisting of Sohee’s fangirls. Nevertheless, when you started releasing music, your career exploded with the sound of R&B you delivered. The public idolized your image, often calling you the “Predebut Han Sohee.” You had tattoos and piercings, had an extended wolf cut, loved partying, and had the tomboy style. It had the male public hating you and their girlfriends wanting you. Through your career with Pnation, you gained many friends who were also soloists in the industry, B.I. being one of them. During his time with YG, you always went to their concerts, ensuring your best friend knew you’d be right by his side no matter what.
If people didn’t believe in your bond before, the union was proven when you made an unexpected move. When B.I. left YG and decided to create the 131 Label, you quickly joined the company and collaborated with the fellow soloist. BTBT was a hit, not only in popularity, but the song was undeniably a banger, and you were honored to even be featured in it, even making an appearance in the music video. 
But fame wasn’t always going to be in your favor. As an avid party girl, you fell into a hole of rumors and lies. You were in a scandal after almost every event, especially with female idols. So here you were again, with Hanbin and Sohee in your apartment, reading the statement your company had released, denying the accusations again. This time, it was with Blackpink’s Rose, as the public had seen you coming out of dinner together in Paris.
“I just can’t be friends with anyone nowadays.” You scoff, forehead in hand, and hear both chuckling at your issue. “You can’t blame the public, Y/n. Everyone is just in love with you,” your sister points out, and you roll your eyes. “Says you, unnie.”
“You should be used to this by now, noona,” Hanbin tells you with shrugging shoulders, and you can’t help but laugh. “I am, though! It seems like the public is the one who isn’t.” You were aware of your impression on the public, but it irritated you when they acted this way. But that was just part of your job, telling yourself that every single time a scandal happened. “Disregarding that for now, aren’t you excited about next week?” Hanbin asks you, and Sohee looks at him confusingly. 
“I’m the guest judge for Street Woman Fighter,” you say in a calm timbre, and your sister’s eyes widen. “You gonna meet Jam Republic, Bebe, and Tsubakill?” You look shocked at your sister. “You knew who was on the show yet had no idea I’d be guesting next week?” Your teasing tone made your sister smack your arm, “I only saw clips, okay? But I’m excited for you!” She gets jumpy in her chair while Hanbin laughs at you, a face holding disgust as you watch your sister. “She can’t even be happy. She knows nothing about the international crews,” Hanbin points at you accusingly, and you just shake your head. “I can’t help it, okay? I only know 1Million because of Lia unnie.”
As the two of them argue with you and introduce the other crews to you, a set of girls were squealing in their hotel in another part of Seoul. The two youngest of Jam Republic watched on an iPad, and the three oldest sat there, watching them in slight worry. “Are they okay?” Ling whispers to the two, and Latrice laughs, “They’ve been obsessed with Han Y/n since they found out she’d be the next guest judge.” 
“Han Y/n?” Kristen asks confusingly. Ling and Latirce can’t hold back the distress on their faces, “Yes, Kirs, THE Han Y/n.” Kristen shrugs at their words, “I don’t know her.” That’s when the two youngest hear this and let out a blaring gasp. “Girl, you have to listen to her music,” Audrey says, shoving her phone in the leader’s face. Kristen listened and was pleased to hear everything presented to her.
“Dude, she’s smoking hot, man,” Emma voices, and she relaxes more on the couch, thinking of seeing your face. Ling rolls her eyes at her, and Latrice smiles, finding Emma’s rare fangirling cute. 
This intrigues Kirsten. Emma wouldn’t openly share things like that but had no hesitation regarding you. 
Before the day came to the first start of the Kpop mission, Kirsten found herself having your songs on repeat, dancing to them when she had the time. Her crew observed her, loving her newfound liking for you. Well, not you specifically. The woman still had no idea about what you looked like, only ravishing over your music.
“She gonna be so surprised tomorrow,” Ling tells the group as they watch their leader dance in the studio, and everyone nods. “Agreed.”
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Finally, it was time for your appearance on the show, and you made sure to be prepared for the first impressions you were about to have on most of the girls.
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The ride there was quite eventful, though. Friends were blowing up your phone in anticipation of your presence on the show. So when you make your way into the building, you send a selfie to the group chat, showing the building's lobby. Everyone fans over the sight and asks you to take pictures with specific crews, and you laugh at their texts. 
You go backstage and see the guest room that was prepared for you. As you sat in a chair, the team touched up your hair and makeup. “Oh Y/n-nim!” You hear and see Monika coming from the door. “Monika-saem! It’s nice to see you again,” she greets you with a side hug. “Are you ready for this?”
“I can’t deny I’m a little nervous,” you tell her as you anxiously move around in the chair. “You? Nervous? Never thought I’d hear that from you,” she jokes while patting your back. “I’m not known to be a dancer like that! I’m just worried about the public's opinion.” She then looks you dead in the eyes, “You know well that you shouldn’t be worried. The people will always love you, Y/n-ah. Besides, everyone knows you’re a talented dancer.”
“Thank you, unnie.” She nods at your appreciation and smiles. “Have you met Shownu yet?” You shake, “I met him during the Hero promotions a few years ago.” The male idol walks in as if right on queue, with 3 caramel iced coffees in his hand. “I heard my name?”
“Of course you did. With your sonic hearing,” you say, making the two judges laugh. He hands you the coffee, and you thank him. “Dude, you’re gonna be so hyped when you see them all dance.” Your brow raises at his statement, “Now you're raising my expectations too high. They might blame you if I’m too harsh on them.”
“You can’t even be too harsh. They’re all professionals. I'm sure they’ll be to your standards.” Monika points out, and Shownu nods. Everyone starts getting ready, and when it's time to announce you, you hear Daniels' voice ringing in your ears. “Today, as your guest judge for the Kpop mission, we have Korean-American solo artist Han Y/n.”
You walk out onto the stage's walkway, bowing at everyone as you walk to your seat. Emma and Audrey could be seen jumping up and down, hugging each other when seeing you in person. Ling and Latrice, on the other hand, felt a sense of comfort when they heard that you're also American. They blindly trusted you, hoping you wouldn’t be so biased amongst the Korean crews.
Kirsten was the only one who stood in that room, frozen, when you walked in. She knew to predict someone attractive since the girls fangirled over your face for the entire week, but she wasn't expecting this. You looked like you were built by the gods. All she wanted to do was get on her knees and thank them.
“Wah~ Everyone’s right when they say she's every girl's type.” 1Million Redy says in awe of you.
“She’s so pretty, what the heck?”
“You think I can get a picture after?”
All the crews cheered and gossiped at your appearance, admiring your appearance.
“Hello, I’m soloist Han Y/n. Please take care of me,” you bow and introduce yourself in Korean, English, and Japanese to the teams. “I’d love to take care of you,” Kirsten mumbles under her breath, but Latrice hears the words, giggling at the sight of her leader, who looked like she was about to drool because of you. “Kirs, pull yourself together.”
“I can’t help it, like are we looking at the same person?” Kirsten dramatically sighed, and the girls teased. “Maybe you should ask her for help later~.”
“I’m sure she’d be happy to help you,” Ling gazes at her leader with a wink. “Alright, please pay attention and stop bullying me,” they all laugh, and your eyes find their way to the sound. “The Kpop mission has everyone fighting against each other with songs under the 4 companies: HYBE, JYP, SM, and YG.”
You relax in the chair, manspreading a little as Daniel continues, “2 of the 4 companies have a three-way tie and will battle it out here in the fight zone. The crew with the most votes will have to choose a different company to work with.” You nod in understanding. As much as Kirsten would like to say she was listening, she watched your loosened stance on the chair. You looked so fine just sitting there, and Kirsten bit her lips at the sight of you. She was a sucker for piercings and tattoos, which you did have, but her eyes lingered on your arms. Your veins could be seen popping out as they rested comfortably on your chest, and your lap looked like the perfect seat for her. “We’ll start off today with HYBE. Jam Republic, you're up first,” Daniel announces, pulling Kristen out of her unholy thoughts.
The girls get up from their seats, stretching more, “Should we just go for it?” She asks her team, and everyone nods, “Yeah, let's go.”
The girls stood before the judges as some other crews stayed beside them to enjoy the front view. Your eyes travel from every girl on the team until you stop at the leader. “Kirsten Dodgen, huh?” You whisper, remembering everything Hanbin and Sohee told you about the girl. How she was the famous “green shirt girl” in Justin Beiber’s “Sorry” music video and how she was part of the mega crew, the Royal Family. With this information in mind, your eyes never left hers as they performed.
When holding the starting pose, Kirsten feels the weight of your gaze, feeling her hands gradually sweat. The music begins with Le Seraphim's track starting them off,  and regardless of how nervous you make the girl, she shows you every cent of confidence she has. Her hips moved swiftly like water, and you can’t help but bite your lip at the sight. She could really move, you admit to yourself. The afro-dance was evident in how she carried herself, the rhythm similar to the choreography of BTBT, which led to your body feeling uncontrollable. Swaying to the way they moved.
“Well, we know who Y/n would’ve voted for,” Mina Myoung quips as all the crews watch you enjoy their performance. “Dope” by BTS begins to blare on the speakers, and their groove switches to Hip-Hop. Audrey put a smile on your face with her facial expressions and nearing the end, when the finale consisted of the little twist their waist did with an added reverb effect, you toss your hands up with a clap, “That was nasty,” you told Shownu who nods in agreement. 
Mannequeen then took the stage, and once again, everyone had high energy as they watched. The same could be said for DeepNDap. Still, once people saw the votes, everyone felt the intensity of the room when seeing DeepNDap lost by a landslide compared to the two other crews. “That’s gotta burn,” you mumble.
Next was the JYP battle, and Tsubakill went first. Your attentiveness shows with the scary look in your eyes, but you get hyped up when Tsubakill uses their shirts as a prop, clapping at the scene. Then, Team Bebe joined the stage, and it was phenomenal. You shouldn’t have felt any anxiety or nervousness since you thoroughly enjoyed each performance, especially when Bada is revealed through the imitation of double doors. You smirk at the sight, finding it quite enticing to look at. 
“Another heart stealer, huh?” You tell Shownu, who chuckles at your words. While you watch, Kirsten notices the look you give team Bebe. “Looks like someone likes team Bebe as well,” and the team looks at you. “I don’t blame her,” Audrey shrugs, and Emma laughs, “Everyone’s in love with Bada as well. They’re like a match made in heaven.”
Kirsten's chest tightens at her members' words. You surely weren't interested in the taller dancer...right?
“Kirs? You good?” Latrice asks, and she nods, not wanting to expose herself, but Emma catches on quickly. “I think Kirs may have a slight problem,” the second youngest teases the leader, and the younger girl points at Bada. “She may have some competition.” Kirsten rolls her eyes at the girls as they snicker around her. Because of their noises, your attention goes to them. You see the frustration on the girl's face, and it makes you smile. She looked so adorable with a pout on her face. This causes you to barely watch the 1Million stage.
“I hope whatever song we get, we’ll do good.”
“We’re always good guys. As long as we try our best, that’s all that matters.” You hear from the dancer and nod to yourself, her words also resonating with you. When the votes came in, Tsubakill had zero votes, and you gasped. Everyone must’ve really liked the dance if they had no votes. So when each group is presented with their company of choice, everyone begins practicing.
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You began walking around, handing bottles to each team and chatting with them. Your first few stops were DeepNDap, Lady Bounce, Mannequeen, and Wolf’Lo, and then you make it to the trendiest crew on the show.
“Hello~,” you said, bowing to the girls of team Bebe. They all look at you with terrified eyes. You chuckle at this, “Here, I don’t bite,” you tell them as you hand the water bottles, everyone thanking you. “You didn’t have to, Y/n-nim,” the blonde, Tatter, says, but you shake your head. “It’s the least I can do for you guys.”
You straighten your shirt and ask, “Do you guys have anything yet?” “Yeah, we have a bit for the chorus,” Bada says, and you settle in the dance studio a bit more, sitting on the floor in front of them. “Can I get a sneak peek?” They all nod excitedly, and you hide a giggle, finding the younger girls cute. They play Maniac by Stray Kids from the chorus, and your smile grows when you see the blonde being dragged with her team walking, almost like robots, beside her. When finished presenting, you stand up, clapping your hands. “I can’t wait to see the final product, girls.” They bow, most covering their face in happiness. “You're leading your team well. I can tell your chemistry is strong,” you say as you pat Bada’s arms. “Thank you, Y/n,” she smiles, and you head out. “Okay, good luck, guys! I’m gonna bring more water for the other teams.”
Then your next stop is 1Million, and you enter their rehearsal room with a cheesing grin. “Lia-unnie~,” you say, walking towards her to hug her. You had worked with Lia in a previous comeback and were close friends with her. She made the entire process enjoyable for you. You always kept that in mind since it was stressful, and you appreciated her guidance. “Y/n-ah,” she says softly, reciprocating the loving hug. “I brought all you guys water,” you tell them, showing the bag filled with bottles.
They thank you, and you watch them practice a little, and you can tell Lia is stressed the entire time. So once they took a break, you approached her, giving her a piece of candy. “Here, don’t be too hard on yourself, unnie,” you say, patting the older’s shoulder. “I can’t help it, Y/n. Everyone has high expectations for me here.” You nod, understanding the pressure she felt. “That doesn’t matter. You’re one of the greatest choreographers out there. I’m sure you’ll make it past this unnie,” you try and reassure her, and she tells you to get going so they can practice. You mumble fine and move along to your next destination.
Tsubakill. The girls were so concentrated on practicing they didn’t even notice your arrival in their room. “Hello?” You question in Japanese, and they jump in surprise. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you all,” you chuckle at their reactions.
“I’m here to just deliver some water, and I’ll be out of your way,” they gratefully accepted the water bottles but were curious. “Your Japanese is really good. Where did you learn?” Their youngest, Rena, questions you.
“Aye~ I’m not that good. But I wanted to learn for my Japanese fans to communicate with them when promoting.” A series of ‘ah’s could be heard. “That does make sense.”
“Anyways, I don’t think you guys need any of my feedback right now, so I’ll leave you all to it,” you wave off and end with the final team you were anticipating. You searched for them in every room but finally found them practicing on the walkway area on the second floor. 
Your eyes linger on the team, not wanting to distract them while they do a draft take of their dance. That's when your gaze lands on Kirsten as she leads her team, “So when we do this swing part, I want both of you to kind of mimic the movement,” she tells Ling and Latrice, who automatically follow her lead, taking the critiques into account.
“Hey,” you voice out, and everyone stares at you, not knowing what to say. “Um… I brought you guys some water,” you say in English, and they smile. “Thanks,” Kirsten tells you, and you give a curt nod, “It’s no problem.”
“You guys are insane, by the way,” you say as you tilt your head to the side. “I hope you guys don’t mind if I watch your practice for a bit.”
“Of course not, by all means. Just try and get comfortable,” she gives you a wink with a teasing grin, and your head falls back due to her gesture. This girl was gonna be trouble for you. You travel to a chair in the corner and watch as the practice goes on, eyes never leaving Kirsten's figure.
Your head spins at how she moves, finding her body rousing to witness. That was until they made it to the next series of parts. Kirsten had to shake her hips, but somehow, it wasn’t up to the quality of your liking. You raise your hand, and the crew notices, “Yes, Y/n?” “Sorry, but when you move your hips, you can exaggerate more.”
“Can you show us what you mean?” Latrice presses on, and you make your way over to Kirsten. You towered behind their leader, and your hands traveled down her hips. Position her into the move and put pressure on your hands as you take control of her lower half. Kirsten’s mind was out of focus when she felt your strong, veiny hands touching her. “I know you can move those hips, girl, so how about we put them to work?” You question in her ear, and she has a devious grin. “Show me then.”
Her team watches as you rotate her hips with the touch of your hands, and they can’t help but giggle on the sidelines. “She took asking for help way too seriously,” Audrey whispers, and the rest nod with their fits of giggles.
You two feel a rhythm despite no music, and Kirsten’s heart fastens as you caress her waist. “Shit, you- you are so beautiful,” you mumble but make sure she heard it, and her face reddened. She shakes her head, straightens, and claps at her team, “Alright, thank you, Y/n, but we have to do some more choreo to be in top shape in 2 days.” You stand there a bit surprised, which follows a soft laugh at her crappy excuse. “Okay, okay. I’ll just watch a bit more.” You sat back in your chair, watching them more freely this time as they did their work.
After an hour, you look at the phone and decide it is an excellent time to head home, but talk to the girls before leaving. “Are you guys free tomorrow?” “I believe so, why?” Kirsten asks, and you hand your phone over to her, “I thought it would be a good idea to bring all the crews out for a relaxing night. I was gonna rent out the VIP section of a club before you guys performed.”
The girls all jump in excitement while Audrey sulks, and you pat her head, “I know you're too young, Audrey, but I’ll plan a dinner with everyone just for you.” Her eyes brighten at your promise as she hugs you. “Okay, don’t kill the woman now, Audrey,” Ling tells the youngest, and everyone laughs. Kristen puts her number in, and you grin, “Okay, good luck with practice, girls. I’ll chat with you later, Kristen,” you point at her, and she waves you off seductively. 
“Kirs is down bad right now.”
“Stand up, girl,” Emma jokes, and the leader rolls her eyes at the team.
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The next day, every girl was preparing for the long night ahead, and Audrey watched her team as they frantically ran around their hotel room. “You guys look good in anything,” the youngest says, but everyone pays no mind. “This is what I get for trying to be nice,” she mumbles, but Emma hears it and laughs. “They stressed Auds. What can we do,” Emma says with a shrug.
After an hour, all the girls were ready, and Kirsten revealed her outfit. She had a pleated denim skirt, a pale yellow halter top, and white mini-heels. The leader's hair looked slightly slicked back, and it tied everything together. “Ooo~, who are you about to show out for?” Ling taunts and Kirs has a light smirk on her face, “You already know, girl.”
The girls squeal in eagerness, “So we ready to go?” The older three nod and Audrey walks them out, “Be safe, and don’t come home too late.”  The older girls hug her goodbye and travel to the club by Uber. You had sent the leader the details, and she was incredibly excited when you said, “I can’t wait to see you there, beautiful.” It caused her so much happiness the entire day that she couldn’t sit still. 
Once the four entered the club, they were escorted to the VIP area on the second floor, overlooking the crowds who cheered for Y/n and the other crews. You sat at the bar, Lia and Bada by your side, with a dark-colored drink in hand. Kristen halts when she sees you. Your attendance wakes her up as she notices every detail about you.
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Kirsten wanted to tell you how delicious you looked, but just for the sake of her pride, she greets the other girls instead before getting to you. Bada points at the foreign crew, making you look at them, and a coy grin forms on your face. The Jam Republic crew began to split up, talking to multiple other teams, and you made your way over to Kristen, who sat with some of the Mannequeen girls.
“I’m glad you could make it,” you say, handing her a drink of soju, as you weren’t really familiar with her type of alcohol. She thanks you and sips the beverage, “I’d never say no to a party and having fun.”
“I don’t either, but I was kinda excited for this one,” You voiced in a playful tone, and Kirsten smirked, deciding to play along. “Oh yeah? Why is that?” Your body bends down to her ear, and she feels your breath tickling her as you breathe out, “It means I get to see you more.”
The shorter girl’s breathing becomes unsteady at the close distance. Still, Kirsten's exact flirtatious nature wouldn’t make that obvious. You take her hand and lead her to the bar, “Is there something you prefer to drink?” “Coke and rum would be nice,” and your eyebrows go up at this. “My type of girl,” You tell her calmly, ordering the drink as a blush forms on her cheeks. “So, the green shirt girl in Justin Bieber’s music video?” Kristen lets out a burst of laughter at your random question.
“You went viral all those years ago, and I never knew who you were? I’m so out of touch with internet culture,” you shared, your head hanging low with a chuckle. “It’s fine. I was also seventeen then, so you probably wouldn’t even recognize me.”
“SEVENTEEN?” You inquisitively ask, and she nods. “Well, you grew up into a fine young woman, if I say so myself,” you tell her as you take a swig of alcohol. “You say that as if you’re much older than me,” Kirsten looks at you with a questioning face. “Hey, 3 years is quite some time, okay?” You point out, both of you letting out a laugh. 
“How about you? I don’t know how you got into dancing,” She says truthfully, and you think. “It hasn’t been that long since I started. Compared to you guys, I’m pretty mediocre at best.” Now, that statement, Kirsten knew, was a lie. “That’s definitely not true,” She says, and you look at her curiously. “How would you know?”
“Or else you wouldn’t have been a judge on the show,” She explains. The truth was, she had watched some of your dancing videos throughout the years, but why would she want to expose herself in front of you. “That’s true, I guess.” You were about to continue, but another song started, and the whole club cheered. Kirsten’s eyes brightened at the song, and she pulled you to the dance floor, “Come on, let’s dance!” She says, trying to yell over the loud music.
Once the two of you were on the dance floor, you felt the mixture of sweaty bodies and the wafting scent of alcohol that clung to everyone’s bodies. That didn’t matter to either of you, though, as Kirsten confidently whines her waist to the beat. Your eyes study her with hunger, finding every curve of her body moving to the rhythm. Your self-control defeats you as you grasp her waist, and Kristen feels the warmth of your hands. She moves back, grinding her ass on your body, and you wrap one arm around her waist as you motion in sync. The shorter applies more pressure on your pelvis, and you can’t help but let out a subtle groan in her ear, finding her irresistible. The halter top didn’t cover much, and you wanted to touch every part you could, skimming over her chest as if her skin begged to be marked.
She turns around, arms wrapping around your neck, closing the distance between you two, if possible. Now you felt her chest beating on yours, your forehead resting on each other. Her eyes linger on your lips, and you notice, when bitting your lips, that she lets out giggles of expectation. You adored the charming sounds, and your lips chased hers, and you felt the buzz of her lips on yours. The taste of sweetness from the alcohol lingered on her tongue as they mingled harmoniously. Hearing the soft whimpers encourages you to pull her waist tighter, hand leading lower and lower on her body. You pull away, trying to catch your breath as you mumble to her, “You think you’ll be able to dance if I take you home tonight?” 
“I’ll make it work,” She mumbles, pulling you in again. The kiss felt heated as her hands roam around your toned figure, “Besides, I told you I want to have fun tonight.” You smirk at her words and pull her out of the club, ensuring you made it worth her while tonight.
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Tag list (OPEN): @gaymoregayandgayer @froufrousnowman @yxine @tikitsune @kpopgirl-97 @hellokittyyysstuff
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peppermintquartz · 2 months
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Love your writing! Thank you for all you provide for the bucktommy fandom! For the prompts: spiderman kisses
You're welcome! My preferred method to engage with fandom is to write fics and I'm glad people are appreciating them ❤️
Ooh that is a hard one. I'm gonna try.
*
"How long ago was this movie?" Evan asks, settling in next to Tommy.
"It's from 2002," says Tommy.
"Wow, that's, like, vintage."
"I'm gonna pretend you didn't say that."
Tommy figures the first Spider-Man movie (the best of the live-action adaptations, in his biased opinion) is a good blend of action and drama and romance to entertain Evan and himself. He found James Franco hot, back in the day, and this movie brought back his teen crush feelings.
Evan sniffles when Uncle Ben dies, and Tommy cuddles him close. But the rest of the movie makes up for it, particularly when Peter Parker saves Mary Jane in the pouring rain.
"Oh wow, Kirsten Dunst is so hot," Evan muses. They've shifted positions so that Tommy is leaning against the arm of his couch and Evan is lying on him, like a spoiled cat.
Tommy stifles a laugh by kissing the top of his boyfriend's head. "Almost all my friends thought so. Some of them were especially focused on the fact she wasn't wearing a bra in this scene. Then again, we were all horny teenagers, so I guess that's to be expected."
"Yeah, it is hard to miss that," Evan comments. Then he sighs. "It's such a romantic kiss though."
"It's an original idea too, not copied from the comics," Tommy says, because sometimes he knows things. "Got parodied to hell and back after that, but that's how you know it's iconic."
Pausing the movie, Evan shifts and turns around, nearly elbowing Tommy in the ribs. "You know, I wanna try that."
Tommy raises an eyebrow. "An upside-down kiss? You do know neither of us are Spider-Man, right?"
Evan gets to his feet and drags Tommy out of the couch. "I have an idea. Come on come on come on come on, I wanna try something."
Putting up a token display of resistance, Tommy lets Evan lead him into the garage. Evan stares at the pull-up bar, his eyes narrowing, and then he grabs it, swings one long leg up and then the other, and hangs on to it with hands and knees.
Tommy is not amused but worried. "Baby, please get down," he says as he hurries in place to keep his arms under his boyfriend, ready to break his fall.
"Kiss me first," Evan demands. His face is already turning red from being upside down.
Tommy quickly pecks him on the mouth. "There are safer ways to have upside-down kisses, babe. I don't want you breaking your neck.
"That's not how the kiss went."
"Evan Buckley, I'm not playing. Get off the bar carefully." Tommy resorts to using his Serious Tone, which he hates to use on his boyfriend, but sometimes Evan does rush into things a little too impulsively and Tommy has to rein him in.
Pouting, Evan gets off the contraption, and Tommy pulls him into a hug and kisses the pout away. Evan keeps his eyes downcast. "Hey. That was just too unsafe. We can do the kiss lying down, okay?"
Evan peers through his lashes. "I want a proper Spider-Man kiss."
Tommy huffs through his nose and pulls Evan to the Muay Thai mat. They lie down, head to head but their feet angled in opposite directions. Tommy cups Evan's cheek. It's a different feeling, the way his hands are angled, and he leans in to kiss Evan.
It is very different. The top of his tongue slides over the top of Evan's tongue; his nose is bumping against Evan's stubbled chin. He changes the angle of his mouth and tries again.
After a moment, they both pull away. Evan is giggling. "I don't think that was as hot as the movie's version," he admits. Rubbing the tip of his nose, he adds, "I love your cleft, but I think I prefer if my nose isn't rubbed raw on it."
Tommy laughs and gets up, before he reaches for Evan. "Yeah, I think I'll stick to the regular way. Besides, I like seeing your eyes after we kiss."
"Really? Why?"
Tommy shrugs. He's not that good with words. "I just like it, that's all." He kisses his boyfriend again, right way round this time, and when he pulls away, he watches Evan blink, his wide blue eyes a little dazed and his lips curving into a smile. "Yeah, exactly like that. I like seeing that."
Evan tucks an arm around Tommy's waist. "You're so sweet." Biting his lower lip, he asks, "So, shall we finish the movie and make out on the couch like horny teenagers afterwards?"
"Sounds like a plan."
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psicheanima · 18 days
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i got intrigued by the fact that you did a senior paper on the witches from madoka - can you please tell us some more about that? i love when academic work ties to personal interests.
I can do you one better. You can just read it. Screenshots as it’s from a website. This is the actual final. I can’t include my analysis portion in an image because there’s a ten image limit on mobile. So it’s under the cut. And please be gentle, because I wrote this when I was 18.
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Icebox Cake
Icebox Cake is the alternate name for the pastry Charlotte. This is of course a reference to the witch Charlotte, who the poem is about. This story is a direct adaptation of Charlotte’s canon backstory as revealed in the Magia Record Game. Charlotte is the only witch in this collection with a concrete backstory, and the only one who we know the real name of — Nagisa Momoe.
Nivelles Charaxinae
Nivelles Charaxinae is a reference to both this witch’s namesake and her design. The witch this story is about is Gertrud, named after the saint of gardens, Gertrud of Nivelles. Charaxinae is a reference to the type of butterfly that is in Gertrud’s witch form. The names of her roses in her diary entries are names of saints. I wanted to give her roses human names to show they are the true ‘humans’ to her, but also maintain a degree of disconnect. I think like Gertrud’s namesake, saints are the least human human you can be.
In case your words are all that’s left of me…
In case your words are all that’s left of me… is the only poem with a completely made up title. Though I want the ending of what happened to HN Elly, the witch of this story, to be up to reader interpretation, her feelings of having no real presence besides her online one was something I wanted to make very clear, so that’s why I chose this title.
The usernames are all references to songs sung by Marguerite in Faust. Faust is a work with immense impact on Madoka, having numerous references both visually and story wise. Most notably, quotes from it are littered in every witch labyrinth. Keeping with the theme of this poem being the odd one out name wise, HN Elly actually has another name— Kirsten. This is after Dorothy Kirsten, who famously portrayed Marguerite, which is why I paid tribute to her role.
POESIE SCHMECKT GUT
I based most of my references off the real life women the witches are named after. It shows most in POESIE SCHMECKT GUT. The namesake of this story’s witch, Elsa Maria, is Elsa Asenijeff. POESIE SCHMECKT GUT was a publishing firm for one of Elsa’s books. The base storyline is based off of Elsa’s unhappy arranged marriage, and the religious and star theme was already there in Elsa Maria’s labyrinth.
Guernica
This poem is all about visual art from the point of view of a girl who doesn’t really understand it, so I was a perfect person to write this. All the references were surface level, sort of awkwardly shoved in ones to famous pieces and artists. The title is reference to one of Piccaso’s most famous pieces, an extremely meaningful and striking abstract about war. For this witch, who is named Izabel, who does nothing but copy others, I couldn’t think of anything better to name her story, because I knew she herself could never find value in Guernica.
It’s raining again today. How long will I continue to be unlucky for?
There’s not a lot to say about this one, but I think the witch that it’s about, Patricia, would like that. The story is pretty self explanatory, but it’s one of my favorites because of that. The title is reference to a line in her labyrinth.
2 parts Absinthe 1 part Brandy 1/2 part Gin 3 parts Vodka 1 part Crème de Mûres
This witch, Roberta, is pretty special. First off, she’s an adult witch, the only in the series. She’s said to be fond of alcohol, which I tried to portray in the lack of grammar and punctuation, like you’re listening to the incoherent thought stream of the intoxicated. The title is the ingredients to her namesake, the Aunt Roberta cocktail, which is the strongest drink in the world.
Source Title: Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Source Creators: Atsuhiro Shinbo & Gen Urobuchi & Shaft Productions
Year Published/Produced: 2011
Setting: The series mainly takes place in the fictional city of Mikakihara Japan, 2011. The rest of the series takes places in the otherworldly “Labyrinths”, dark mental landscapes based on the inner feelings of the witch they belong to.
Plot Summary: The series follows a middle school girl named Madoka Kaname, who is approached by a creature named Kyuubey to grant her any wish in exchange for becoming a “magical girl” and fighting against witches— supernatural creatures that kill humans. Eventually, it is revealed witches are fallen magical girls who fall into despair and that Kyuubey purposefully creates this magical girl to witch cycle to feed off their sadness, as his species uses said emotion like energy to fight otherworldly creatures far away, to prevent the destruction of the universe.
In the end, Madoka becomes a magical girl to wish for all magical girls to get happy endings— which erases witches from existence, including herself, as all Magical Girls eventually become witches. This creates a paradox through which no one remembers her anymore, except one person, the girl who had wished for her not to live a normal life more than anyone.
Key Character Descriptions
Charlotte— The witch of sweets, it is her nature to be tenacious. Charlotte used to be a ten year old girl named Momoe, who became a witch after falling in despair at the death of her mother.
H.N. Elly— The box witch, it is her nature to be covetous. Her labrynth and cards all imply that she was an internet addicted shut-in turned internet-famous idol, who cracked under the pressure of constant performance.
Elsa Maria— The shadow witch, it is her nature to be self-righteous. Due to her religious imagery, many theorize she was driven to despair after finding out the witches she slayed as a magical girl used to be fellow humans. However, I based my story on her on the life of her namesake, Elsa Asenijeff.
Gertrud— The rose garden witch, it is her nature to be distrustful. Nothing is known about her backstory, so I constructed my adaptation for her based on the info we do know about her, such as the fact that “she holds roses dearer than anything else” and that, “she loathes the thought of humans trampling her labyrinth”.
Patricia— The class representative witch, it is her nature to be an onlooker. It has been said she used to be a normal, serious girl who was overlooked by her classmates. In the show, her wish is for her school life routine to go on forever, which is what I based my adaptation for her on.
Izabel— The artist witch, it is her nature to be vain. In her prior life, she was an artist suffering from a creative block who yearned for others to notice her. It is said that every art piece she produced was something “that you have probably seen somewhere before”.
Roberta— The birdcage witch, it is her nature to rage. Before she became a witch, she was a party girl living a life of surface level relationships, specifically with men, but secretly, she was disgusted by all of them. Her wish was for friends who wouldn’t dislike her.
Cultural Themes
The fear of being alone is a major theme in Madoka Magica, as depicted through the struggles of various characters. Sayaka Miki's desire to win the affections of her crush, Kyousuke, despite his lack of care for her efforts, highlights her fear of being unloved. She becomes obsessed with trying to gain his love, ultimately leading to her downfall.
In a more subtle way, Mami Tomoe's yearning for companionship also highlights the theme of fear of being alone. Despite her cheerful and big sister-like front, Mami is revealed to be deeply lonely and craves companionship. She reaches out to other magical girls in an attempt to alleviate her loneliness, but her efforts are paid in dust.
And of course, the biggest example of this is Homura Akemi's refusal to let Madoka die. Homura goes to great lengths to protect Madoka, trapping herself in a time loop to prevent Madoka from becoming a victim of the magical girl system. Her actions are driven by her fear of losing Madoka and being left alone in a world without her, to the point where she would even let the universe itself be destroyed to save her love.
Through these characters, the series explores the visceral human need for connection, and the disastrous consequences that arise from the lengths we will go to to obtain it.
The central message I want to explore in my adaptation is the prior lives of monsters. Through these stories of monsters before they "became" monsters, I want to delve into the idea of how the creatures of Madoka Magica, framed as so inhumane the literal art style changes for them, used to lead extremely human, flawed lives before the show portrayed them. Using a simple, fairytale-like style of writing and multiple types of writing, like receipts, reviews, and diary entries, I want to portray the mundaneness of their lives, and just how involved in the world they were. That they were real little girls, with real lives that impacted the things around them.
Motifs
The most common motif in Madoka Magica is fairytale motifs, specifically Eastern European fairytales. Witches, little girls tempted by strange creatures, candy houses. One character, Sayaka Miki, even has her entire story based on the little mermaid. She loves a boy, he doesn’t love her, she sacrifices everything for him anyways and then turns into a huge, mermaid monster. I aim to invoke this through my style of writing, taking a simple yet whimsical approach.
Why Madoka?
I like almost everything about this anime. The characters, the love they have for one another, the Czech fairytale-like art style, and that despite the dark themes, the story never supports falling into the darkness yourself. One thing I dislike is that the short 12 episode length, while making the series very “complete” also serves to stunt the potential of a majority of the characters. As the series relies on the connections these characters have, it would have benefited very extremely from a longer run-time to show us the chemistry between the girls and their loved ones, as the lack of screen time can make these deep bonds seem rushed and superficial. I want to try to convey the importance of those deep bonds in my work, but like I said, it’s a matter of time, not passion, so my adaptation can’t fix this issue.
Adding sequels and prequels has, in my opinion, sullied the impact of the original work. Madoka Magica is an intensely popular brand, and thus, is extremely profitable. Making spin-offs for the short series seems obvious from a business point of view. But a majority of these spin-offs are just made simply from this business point of view, and nothing else. One example of this is the most popular spin-off series for Madoka, "Magia Record," which takes place in the same universe with a new, expansive cast of characters. The show feels like a cheap imitation of the original series. Instead of trying to explore new interesting themes or go into depth on the topics brought up in Madoka, it’s just trying to recapture what made it so special without truly understanding why it was so special in the first place.
One of the primary cultural fears explored in Madoka Magica is the fear of death, specifically the death of the ones you love. At the end of the series, it is revealed that Madoka’s aloof best friend, Homura, is actually in love with her and has been stuck in a time loop trying to prevent Madoka’s death, which proves unavoidable. The finale deals with Homura stopping the time loop and accepting her crush’s death, and that the world will move on without her, and so should she. The series tells us death is natural, it happens to all of us, and we cannot stop it. But we can honor the ones we loved and lost and step into the future as they would want.
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luckycharms1701 · 3 months
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*comes sliding into your inbox and excitedly crashes you into a tight bear hug*
OMIGOSH CAPTAIN KIRSTEN YOU’RE BACK! How are you sweet thing!? I’m so glad to hear that your request box is open again! I’m so excited to see what wondrous words you’ll dazzle us with next!
I just had the most splendiferous like EVER, and I can’t believe I hadn’t thought about it sooner. But you like Peepaw Leo right? And I like Peepaw Leo.
So I was thinking like you know…maybe if you’re feeling up for it (if and only if of course) you wouldn’t mind sharing your thoughts on how F!Leo would react to someone who’s generally super amiable and confident with all the other and resistance members, suddenly turns almost painfully polite an awkward around him. (This is legit how I act around people who I think are attractive) It happens so much to the point that he thinks they don’t him when in reality, they like him so much it flusters them to the point they don’t know how to act around them.
Basically I just wanna see how a “mature” Leo would act when he realizes someone likes him so much they can’t function 😆
Once again, this is just an idea to get those creative juices flowing, so please do with it as you so wish and remember that you’re a darling treasure! MWUAH 😘🧡✨
anon-chan!!! hello!!! 🫂🫂🫂 i’m so glad to see you in my inbox!!!
congratulations anon-chan! this is officially the most difficult request that has ever been asked of me. i’ve spent weeks trying to figure this out. started writing a little fic, but it didn’t feel right. so i thought maybe i could do some headcanons, but every time i tried to start i didn’t know where to start!
the problem i’m having is variables. there are so many variables for how this could turn out, mostly depending on timing. when exactly during the resistance does this happen? because i feel like that informs leo’s response. so have some of my unfiltered thoughts. a peek into how i “organize” my writing thoughts, if you will. i’m sorry in advance
Early 20s: This Leo is still confident and optimistic, at least outwardly. He and his brothers defeated Shredder twice, how hard can the Kraang be? Sure, they need some help and it’ll take longer, but it’ll definitely work out in the end and life will resume as normal. Right?
So I imagine that Leo at this age would see you suddenly pulling away and acting formal with him and get upset at first. He thought you were friends, why are you doing this? He would likely reciprocate or get snippy, at least until one of his brothers, probably Mikey but possibly Raph, comes to him and is like “Dude. Come on.” Give the guy a break, there’s a lot going on you know??? So at his brother’s suggestion, he sits back and observes.
When he finally confirms for himself that you do, in fact, have feelings for him and that’s why you’re being standoffish with him, watch out! This little shit is going to make you suffer a bit. He’s going to start flirting with you. Lots of compliments, little winks, soft touches… You will be inundated.
Something changes. Perhaps they lose their biggest battle to date. Perhaps someone close to him dies. Perhaps it is Casey Jr’s birth. Any way it plays out, Leo realizes that life is shorter than it seems, that love is precious and fleeting and should be grasped. He realizes that his teasing may be a little more… genuine on his side than he’d realized.
So he comes to you. Perhaps he goes full ham, arranges a romantic meeting somewhere, plans a dinner. Perhaps you end up in danger, and he goes a little crazy about it. Perhaps it is just a quiet moment that the two of you manage to steal. Either way, he tells you how he feels.
Late 20s/Early 30s: Now here is a Leo who is starting to realize that they might be in over their heads. He’s lost at least one member of his family. He’s watched them steadily lose ground to the Kraang, despite everyone giving their best effort. He is starting to understand that they might not win this fight. At this point he’s probably learned how the Kraang came to our world and that he played a part in their arrival.
This Leo is overwhelmed, but still holding strongly to hope. He’s determined to do everything in his power to keep morale up. That’s why he notices immediately when you seem to start pulling away from him. He takes it a little personally at first. Yeah, maybe he’s not as fun as he used to be, but he’s trying to run a resistance here, that’s no reason to give him the cold shoulder. He resolves to approach you about it.
Something changes. Perhaps he notices you give him a sidelong glance. Perhaps someone teases you and he overhears. Perhaps he sits you down for that talk and you confess. He learns why you are so standoffish, and suddenly he has a choice to make.
Leading a resistance is a 24/7 job. He has no time for anything, especially when he has so much to make up for. Does he even deserve the sliver of happiness you’re offering him? And there’s the niggling thought in the back of his head that everything is futile anyway, that they’re going to lose and you’re going to die.
But if there’s one thing he’s learned out of all of this, it’s that life is short. He doesn’t want to die with regrets, and he knows he would regret not taking this chance. And he wants to give you what happiness he can, you deserve that. Wouldn’t it be a little “fuck you” to the Kraang, to find some peace in the midst of the chaos they (he) created?
He goes for it. He takes the risk, jumps in feet first, and tells you how he feels.
Late 30s: Leon. Oh Leon. He holds onto hope fiercely, with both hands, but he can’t, he won’t, keep any of it for himself. He understands implicitly that even if by some miracle they win, he’s not going to survive this fight.
He’s going to notice immediately when your behavior changes, when you get stiff with him. He keeps his finger on the pulse of everyone close to him, pays attention so that he can help them if they start to flag. It won’t take long for him to pull you aside, to ask you if everything is okay, if you need a break.
He’s going to figure it out, whether because you admit it to him or through context clues. He’s had years to hone his considerable talent in understanding people, his preternatural ability to know what they want with a glance.
He’s going to figure it out, and he’s going to do… nothing. As long as there’s the tiniest chance that you could survive this, he refuses to tie you to a corpse. Besides, he has been thinking up a plan, a last ditch effort, and maybe you could be the one to put it into action…
Your death hits him like a freight train. His own is a relief.
~~~
head bonks: @yorshie @avery73 @justalotoffanfiction @thejudiciousneurotic @writinandcrying @xnorthstar3x @celticvix @donniesgirlie @gornackeaterofworlds @thelaundrybitch @shakeyourtrees
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badaleesbish · 11 months
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Jealousy | Bada Lee x Reader x Kirsten Dodgen
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Inspired by the writing prompts of @nimxie
°SUMMARY:
𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚊 𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚝 𝚛𝚎𝚕𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚑𝚒𝚙 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝙺𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚗 𝚘𝚏 𝙹𝚊𝚖 𝚁𝚎𝚙𝚞𝚋𝚕𝚒𝚌. 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚞𝚗𝚊𝚠𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚠 𝚖𝚎𝚖𝚋𝚎𝚛𝚜 𝚗𝚘𝚝𝚒𝚌𝚎 𝚑𝚘𝚠 𝚊𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚌𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗𝚊𝚝𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚊𝚛𝚘𝚞𝚗𝚍 𝙺𝚒𝚛𝚜𝚝𝚎𝚗. 𝚃𝚎𝚊𝚖 𝙱𝚎𝚋𝚎 𝚒𝚜 𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢 𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚙𝚢 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚌𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚌𝚕𝚎𝚊𝚗 𝚊𝚋𝚘𝚞𝚝 𝚒𝚝 𝚋𝚞𝚝 𝙱𝚊𝚍𝚊 𝚒𝚜𝚗'𝚝 𝚝𝚘𝚘 𝚏𝚘𝚗𝚍 𝚘𝚏 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚜𝚒𝚝𝚞𝚊𝚝𝚒𝚘𝚗 𝚋𝚎𝚌𝚊𝚞𝚜𝚎 𝚜𝚑𝚎 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚑𝚒𝚍𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚊 𝚜𝚎𝚌𝚛𝚎𝚝 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗 𝚠𝚎𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚘𝚗 𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚜𝚘𝚖𝚎 𝚝𝚒𝚖𝚎 𝚗𝚘𝚠. 𝚂𝚑𝚎 𝚒𝚜 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 𝚒𝚗 𝚠𝚒𝚝𝚑 𝚑𝚎𝚛 𝚋𝚎𝚜𝚝 𝚏𝚛𝚒𝚎𝚗𝚍.
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Heavy breathing surrounding the room. Sweat dripping from the women's faces. Sounds of synchronized footsteps filled the room.
"Again, Kyma keep up. You're a beat behind everyone else."
The tall female said as she watched her crew members practice for their next crew battle.
"Unnie, can we stop? We've been at it for 2 hours, my legs feel like jelly."
The short, blonde, asked as her legs gave in, and she dramatically fell to the floor.
"Oh yeah, guys I'm sorry. I lost track of time, we'll work on this more tomorrow after filming."
Cheers filled the room as the younger ones went to grab their belongings and head out of the studio.
"Bye, see you guys tomorrow."
"Bye, Unnie"
"Hey, Y/N, you coming or are you going to sleep here tonight?"
The younger female looked up from her phone, not realizing that everyone had left, and it was just her and Bada still in the dance studio.
"Oh shit, I'm coming."
"What's so important that you have your phone basically glue to your fucking face?"
"Oh, nothing."
" Oh, come on, I'm your best friend, tell me."
"Bada, I promise it's nothing"
Bada just shrugged it off, not wanting to pry anymore. Maybe it is very nothing.
"Oh my God, are you fucking serious right now?!?!?!"
"Why didn't you tell us, idiot?"
"We're so happy for you!!!"
"So....have you guys like.....done it yet?"
The girls had so many questions now that you told them about your relationship with Kirsten. You were so happy that they don't look at you in a different light now that you basically came out to them.
"What's going on? What did I miss?"
Bada walked into the studio to see all the girls standing around you like you were some type of exhibit.
"Unnie, Y/N Unnie has a girlfriend!!!!"
Minah said, jumping up and down with excitement.
"Oh, and you'll never guess who it is."
"Wh-"
"Kirsten of Jam Republic."
Bada just stood there with an unrecognizable expression on her face. It's almost like she was shocked, confused, angry, hurt, and jealous.
"Ummm.... well, don't let this fuck up our chance to make it to finals."
Bada said coldly as she took off her backpack and walked over to set up for practice. The girls stood there in complete shock, they never seen Bada this way before. All the girl have told Bada about their relationships and she was always so happy for us so what is the difference now.
"Let's go, girls. We have lots to go over and fix so get in formation."
As practice continued, you caught yourself in your head too much, tripping over yourself and bumping into your members. You tried to get back into your spot in this song and ended up bumping into Bada. You quickly backed up and looked down at the floor, too afraid to look up at Bada. You could feel Bada's eyes burning a hole into the top of your head.
"Sorry."
"Yeah, whatever, just get your shit together, Y/N."
Bada said, shoulder checking you as she walked past to go stop the music. You stumbled back a bit from that shoulder check and that was your last straw.
"What is your fucking problem, Bada Lee?Huh..... What the fuck did I do to you?"
The girls gasped at your lack of honorifics towards the older female and leader. Bada stopped dead in her tracks and turned towards that younger female.
"Excuse me?"
"You heard me, Bada Lee. What. Is. Your. Fucking. Problem?"
Bada smirked, tilting her head letting out a light chuckle, as the short girl stepped towards her with every word she said. You looked up at her with your head tilted as well, waiting for her answer.
"What is it, Bada Lee? Do you not want me to be happy?"
"No, of course, I want you to be happy so don't even go there."
"So, what is it? Why are you so pissed off? Tell me, Bada Lee."
"Because...."
Bada hesitates a little, looking over at Tatter for reassurance. Tatter nodded towards her with a light yet warm smile.
"Because.....what, Bada. Just say it."
" Because I love you, Y/N!! So so so much!! More than just friends like I want to be with you."
"W-What???
END OR IS IT...............................
°A/N:
I hope you enjoyed it because I really had fun writing it. I'm open to any feedback and request that you may have. Thanks for reading!!!
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homochampagne · 4 days
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quinn’s in love and death stream summary: all of the lore
he described the way bert’s voice sounds towards the ending of i caught fire as “cute and sweet”
he said he has synesthesia and gave us a color for a lot of the songs. the only ones i remember are: i caught fire is red and yesterdays feelings is green
at the beginning of yesterdays feelings, quinn’s voice can be heard saying “creaks and cracks”. it turns out he was talking about a really old guitar he was playing that wasn’t very good for recording because it made noises as you played
regarding the meaning of yesterdays feelings, quinn said he couldn’t describe it.
a lot of the songs on this album were from ideas quinn came up with. he said he did background vocals on about 75% of the songs
light with a sharpened edge was a title bert came up with, quinn said he really liked that title
in 2004, while the used was working on in love and death and mcr was working on revenge, the two bands lived in the same apartment building in la and would hang out a lot. gerard would come over to quinn’s place and quinn told a story about gerard playing 3 songs from revenge for quinn in his bedroom. quinn said he remembered thinking revenge sounded very cohesive and in love and death was a lot different; it was kind of all over the place and he worried it was too pop and that they were getting too far away from the used’s original sound. he played some songs for gerard as well
quinn talked really positively about mcr, he described them as having a “vampire motorcycle gang” aesthetic back in the day. around 2003 i believe the used took mcr on tour in europe with them; quinn said he’d often film them/take pics of them from the side stage, at one point he was thinking about maybe making a music video for them of liveshow clips but that never happened. he remembers being sure that mcr would become a really huge band (they were still in bullets era at this time)
in 2004 during the writing and recording of in love and death quinn was doing mushrooms and smoking weed and he was reading a lot of philosophy books. i forget the authors name, but chapter 8 of a book he was reading that was about transferring the perspectives/teachings of eastern philosophy into a western lens was called “how to be a genuine fake”. at this time, tensions between him and bert were high, they were butting heads a lot and quinn was sick of his behaviour. he noted how bert would act around people/treat people completely differently; he’d be great to some people and horrible to others. in quinn’s room at the apartment, he handed bert the philosophy book opened to the “how to be a genuine fake” chapter and told him to read it. bert read one page and then threw it on the bed and was like “whatever”. a few days later, bert had written lyrics to a song and said it was titled “i’m a fake”
someone asked about blue and yellow and he said “yes that song’s about me”; he gave us the exact meaning of the “your hands were shaking” line. feldy and bert have both told a story about how during the recording of the first album, bert disappeared for ~2 weeks. bert said he met some girl and was gonna quit the band and whatever. (<- when he’s talking about blue and yellow in that interview, it’s one of those half-truths where like, it did happen, yes, but it’s like the irrelevant part of the larger story, which he obvs doesn’t want to talk about now. gina is a convenient fake inspiration. this section of this interview is so eyeroll inducing because he literally admits to lying about the song in the kirsten dunst part. bert has talked about quinn being the subject of blue and yellow so many times; i have very thorough citations & proof for all of the blue and yellow stuff in my fic masterguide). REGARDLESS, when bert finally showed up at feldy’s again, quinn said that he was so mad and upset that his hands were shaking. (when i say disappeared i mean DISAPPEARED like they couldn’t contact him at all). quinn said that feldy just hugged bert and was like “you can’t do that”. quinn said that at times, feldy was kind of like their dad.
as we all know, all that i’ve got is about bert’s dog david bowie that passed away by getting hit by a car, which in some roundabout way was due to the wrong plane ticket being booked for him meaning he couldn’t take bowie, so he left him with someone who was going to drive him out to wherever the band was heading. quinn said that the line “so deep that it didn’t even bleed” is a reference to the phonecall bert received from his dad who broke the news to him that bowie died, saying “it was quick, there wasn’t even any blood”
the line “i couldn’t come/you couldn’t come” in cut up angels means cum, like orgasm
sound effects and overdramatics is about sex, relationships, and drugs/addiction
feldy told quinn to listen to the beatles entire discography around this time, which he did. he said that there were definitely beatles and nirvana influences on this album. he specifically mentioned territorial pissings, and he mentioned playing a beatles riff backwards on one of the songs but i can’t remember which one :( sorry
quinn likes thursday, and he listened to full collapse a lot
when asked, he said he likes fall out boy
he still talks to mikey sometimes
someone asked if his kids know the used songs and he basically said no, and then he started talking about how his son says “skibidi” and “rizz” and “ohio” and “brainrot” and he like knew all of the lingo???? NDSJSKAKKS and then he was like “back in my day the cringe stuff we would quote was pauly shore” (i’m paraphrasing) and then he did a pauly shore impression
off-tour he would just live out of his backpack, and he rented a spare bedroom at his friends house (im assuming this was like late 2002-early 2004 because in summer 2004 they had the la apartment). he built a bed out of bricks with planks of wood on top. (……this info combined with him just sleeping on the floor of his bedroom at his parents place because there was no bed makes me think he was just used to sleeping on hard surfaces????)
he confirmed that hard to say is about kate, bert’s girlfriend who passed away during the recording of in love and death. it was a song that was added in right at the end of recording and they weren’t sure if they would keep it in. quinn said that he and his family were close to kate, because back at the beginning of the band when bert joined and quinn said he could move in with him, kate lived with them for a period of time too. quinn said that bert and kate were recovering addicts and that he left home for a while at this point because they were staying in his bedroom and sometimes it was “hard to be around them”. we know for sure that quinn sometimes did stay there with bert, because of the whole story where they were sleeping on his bedroom floor together when feldy called from norway in the summer of 2001 and blah blah blah (which he told on branden’s podcast)
towards the end of the recording of in love and death, quinn said that he and bert were not speaking to each other. finding album cover artwork became his responsibility, quinn found alex pardee and basically organized/chose all of the album artwork working with alex (who was the artist)
because we would never figure it out, he told us a secret about ocean of the sky. put on the film 2001: a space odyssey, skip to 20 minutes and 1 second from the ending and play the song tethys and it’s supposed to line up exactly to what happens on-screen. he was inspired by those rumors that you could do the same thing with the original wizard of oz and pink floyd’s dark side of the moon. the guys had been talking about 2001: a space odyssey in regards to ocean of the sky, the “ocean of the sky” meaning outer space. he said he created the song tethys in one sitting, from 9pm - 6am and his computer crashed twice. he digitally mixed it and then sent it off at 9am that morning and that was the last song on that ep.
quinn said that he’s happy bert’s sober now, but it’s “too little, too late” (his exact words)
he confirmed that bert’s struggle with addiction and his behaviour for the majority of the time quinn was in the band was what lead to quinn’s departure. it was draining, exhausting, and the 23 hours a day that they were not on stage was a “nightmare”. he says very confidently that he’s happier now. (side note: if you haven’t listened to this interview with bert about addiction/sobriety i think you should, because he gives details regarding the severity of what was happening. tw: discussion of self-harm)
when asked if there’s any chance he’ll ever play a show with the used again, he said “no”
re: the band and quinn’s frustrations about bert, quinn said he found himself “sitting on his hands” (exact words) a lot of the time and just going along with whatever was happening because he had no other means of enacting change that would actually work (paraphrased). he used a really good metaphor of letting bert “drive”, but quinn would always have “one hand on the wheel”… i feel like that’s self-explanatory
during part of this section of the stream, he got emotional and teary-eyed and said that some of it is hard to talk about
regarding some of the meaning behind quinn’s song i digress, quinn said that it’s about the difficult experience of trying to help a friend who struggles with severe depression and persistent suicidal thoughts, and how he felt that all of his efforts were futile. this seemed to be a recent experience of his. he also spoke about a similarity between this situation and being in the band, which he described as very negative and emotionally taxing when you continually try to help someone who doesn’t want to help themselves. for his emotional wellbeing he needed to step away (in both situations). he also clarified that the lyric is “i’m hanging by your thread” which i got wrong in my transcription. he compared the “i’m hanging by your thread” line to the heart noose.
quinn showed us the physical prototype for his book which is completely finished. he is hopeful that pre-orders will be available in mid-october through kickstarter, he is planning to make a signed book and cassette tape ep bundle which he wants us to receive before christmas (this is all tentative).
he is apparently filming a music video for his second single today (yesterday he spent building the set for it). physical versions of his ep will only be available in cassette tape form because that’s what he grew up with, he likes that they’re small and easy to display
the book has A LOT of exclusive photos in it. he showed us some pages of the book. he said that he started writing it/working on it back when he left the band as a therapeutic, cathartic hobby. aside from the written chapters, there are a lot of pages he created in photoshop that have photo collages that he would draw little pictures on and organize. he said he would work on this to process his emotions, he would cry and let himself feel angry or upset, but it ended up being a very healing project
someone mentioned that they gave him a scrapbook in 2012 (he remembered it) and he said that he still has all of the stuff that the fans gave him/the band. he would box all of it up after their tours and ship it to his house. some of this fan stuff is featured in the book
he really enjoyed the stream and he will likely do another one sometime in the near future (no date is set yet). he’d like to do a listening party for the first album and talk about the songs/behind the scenes lore like he did for this one. he’d also be open to doing a stream just about guitars. people were requesting for him to put out official guitar tabs for the used songs and he said he’ll definitely work on it now that he knows there is interest
he had literally stacks of old photos and showed us some of them which i’ll make a separate post for. at one point he was like “ohhh i can’t show you those” and skipped through a bunch which is just the most infuriatingly intriguing thing like…… i can only imagine.
this was all just written from memory bc for some insane reason recording desktop audio on obs if you have a mac is literally impossible which is crazy in 2024 but regardless i think the livestreams are more special if they aren’t recorded because you have to be there to witness it. i got the vibe that he doesn’t want them to be saved (he said “i can’t” but that’s not true), so instead of asking him in chat next time and you really really want to save it, just record it for your own personal viewing and keep it on the down low. (i’m not telling anyone what to do but i feel like re-uploading to youtube would be against his wishes (he never said this, it’s just my inference)).
if anyone who watched feels like i missed a crucial piece of lore, feel free to add XD
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mikachacha · 1 year
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𝚆𝚘𝚖𝚊𝚗 (𝙱𝚊𝚍𝚊 𝙻𝚎𝚎 𝚡 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛)
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Synopsis: You were only teasing Bada by dancing to Doja Cat's song but it ended backfiring quickly.
Warnings: language, suggestive theme, smutty goodness
(A/N: @jhopes-whoopee-cushion hi 🤧🤧 the wheel of fics won't let me write something else lmao this got selected three times in a row)
🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸💮🌸
"Babe, babe.. Babeeeee!" you called out excitedly to your girlfriend Bada who's busy sorting out yours and her closet. She looked at you and you grinned before connecting your phone to the bluetooth speaker you were carrying. You've been learning new dances and because you're close friends with Kirsten, she taught you some really good ones. One of those is Woman by Doja Cat.
"Hm? You gonna dance for me baby?" Bada asked, now her full attention is on you and you nodded eagerly. You told Kirsten to give you the naughtiest version and she complied. You wanted to tease Bada by telling her it's the one that you're gonna teach at JustJerk.
"Yup! Hold on, lemme get my heels first." you said and grabbed your black heels before you went back in front of Bada and pressed play so you can start. Bada's eyes widened as she recognizes the song. She thought you couldn't be serious right now.
"You're gonna teach this in class??" Bada questioned and you nodded, holding back a mischievous grin as you danced to the music. Bada's eyes followed your every move, the way your hips would sway to the beat of the music. When the lyrics, “come here, papa, plant your seed” came, Bada absolutely lost it. She didn't let you finish your little dance number as seeing you doing floor work with that kind of song made her feral. She just wants to kiss you, make your body shake in pleasure over and over again.
"Badaaaaa I wasn't done yet!" you protested in a playful manner. You didn't even get halfway to the song when Bada just snatched you up and brought you to the bed. She pulled you in for heated kiss while her hands held down yours on either side of your head. She loves taking control, love how you would whine and protest but really couldn't do about it. Love how those pretty noises would come out from your sweet mouth when she'd tease your sensitive spots relentlessly until you're begging for her for more.
"You're so naughty, you know that.. As if I would let you go out and teach that to class where others would see that sexy side of you, maybe fantasize about you.. I'm not letting that happen, baby.." you blushed at Bada's words and giggles at how possessive she's acting. You loved this side of her, loved that you're the only one who gets to experience this side of Bada.
"I was just kidding about teaching it to class so calm your sexy ass down." you told her and she looked at you before slipping her hand between your legs that made your blush even brighter and a small moan to escape your mouth as she began to rub. Bada intends to tease you just the way you teased her though in your opinion, her's is more relentless.
"Mhm.. Though I must admit that you looked really sexy on the floor posed like that.. Reminds me of all those times I did you from behind." she continues. At this point you felt like you're in a daze. You didn't even noticed that Bada has already removed your shirt, well her shirt that you borrowed, and your pajama shorts. It only occurred to you that you're practically naked in front of your girlfriend as you felt the cool air against your heated skin.
Bada's lips were all over you, leaving marks and wet kisses on their wake while a hand is between your legs, rubbing and teasing making you moan out and grind against it all in the same time.
"Bada, please.." you whined out and she chuckles, loving how needy you are at the moment. She pulled your underwear to the side before working her finger inside of you slowly. She loves hearing those soft noises coming from your mouth that gradually increases as time passes by. She would sometimes kiss you to muffle your moans a little when she works in another finger and curl them up just at the right spot, making your knees tremble from the insane amount of pleasure you're receiving.
When Bada felt like you're ready, she pulled her fingers out and licked them before stripping and pulling the strap on she keeps on the bottom part of your drawer. You saw it and gulped visibly. You're now starting to regret teasing Bada earlier. Knowing when she pulls that strap on out of the drawer, it's sure that you wouldn't be walking straight the next morning.
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alliluyevas · 2 months
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Do you think they should make a Mormon pioneer American Girl?
Would I personally get a kick out of this? Yes. Do I actually think they should? Probably not.
First of all, pretty much all AG historical dolls have to navigate complex and difficult historical topics at least to some extent. Some have done it more successfully than others. For instance, Felicity was my favorite historical character as a child and I still like her as a character and enjoy her books, but they don't handle slavery well at all. I think creating a book series and a collection that talks about Mormon history in a way that is a) historically accurate and sensitive b) appeals to LDS families, who would likely be the primary audience and overwhelming majority of doll purchasers for this hypothetical character c) maybe even appeals to a broader market would be a really tall order.
Also, assuming that by "Mormon pioneer doll" you mean a character who comes to Utah in one of the first waves of migration in the mid-to-late 1840s or early 1850s, that is very close in era to Kirsten, whose stories begin in 1854, and who is also a frontier settler. There would likely be a lot of overlap between Kirsten's collection and this hypothetical doll's, as well as in the period details in the books. So this begs the question of how much this doll's inclusion would add to the overall AG historical characters canon. Of course, a major focus in Kirsten's books is her immigration story and her Swedish heritage (though, actually, you could write Utah Pioneer Doll as Scandinavian too given how much LDS conversion there was in that region during this period. That would create even more overlap with Kirsten's story, though.) By contrast, a major focus in Hypothetical Utah Pioneer Doll's story would likely be her religion, and this would be something that would be unique to her.
I wouldn't say that AG has shied away entirely from addressing religious faith and practice with their historical dolls. After all, for most of the classic six-book historical character series, the third book is centered around Christmas celebrations (for Rebecca, the focus is on Hanukkah instead and for Kaya her book series is structured differently than those of the other girls and I am not sure there's a holiday book at all.) In terms of the girls whose books I've reread most recently, Addy's church attendance is mentioned frequently in almost all her books and it's probably more thematically central than for most of the other Christian historical characters. Addy's denomination is also explicitly mentioned in the text (her family attends an African Methodist Episcopal church), while for many other characters it is more implicit. (For instance, Felicity is likely Anglican and Kirsten is almost certainly Lutheran, but neither is directly said in text to my knowledge.) It's been more than 15 years since I read Josefina's books, but I remember church attendance being mentioned more prominently in them as well. (Josefina is Catholic, though again I don't remember if this is explicitly stated the text of the stories.) If AG was to create a Mormon historical doll, her religion would have to be explicit and centralized in the text in a way that is very unusual for them.
But not completely unheard of, which brings me to another doll/storyline that is very relevant in this discussion: Rebecca. Rebecca was the first and, for a very long time, the only Jewish doll. The recently added 1990s twins are also Jewish, though it sounds like religion is comparatively deemphasized in their books, and they're much more secular. (This is a pattern with the more recent historical dolls, by which I mean both the ones created more recently and the ones whose stories are set in the more recent historical past.) I think Rebecca is the character for whom religion is the most prominent in her story (though, of course, because Judaism is an ethno-religion her stories address both her ethnic heritage and religious traditions in tandem, which makes it feel even more central.) She was also (again, until the twins were created) the only historical character who is a member of a religious minority in both a modern and historical sense. That is, in Rebecca's era Jewish Americans were a religious minority and they still are today. I think you could argue that as a Native American Kaya is sort of also a religious minority but I don't think that makes sense in the context of her time. For Catholic historical characters (Josefina, Cecile, and Marie-Grace), I think Catholics were a religious minority in the 19th century but given that it's currently the largest Christian denomination in the country that is no longer applicable. (Also, all three of those characters live in regions and eras where Catholics are the majority. I suppose if we count Best Friend dolls, the presumably-Catholic Irish Nellie is the only doll who would have lived in a context where Catholics were in fact a religious minority.)
Obviously, Mormons are Christians--or not so obviously, I suppose, given that a lot of other Christian denominations do not think they are. But they believe they are a Christian denomination, and I think that matters. Whereas obviously Jewish people are a religious minority in the sense that they are very much not Christians. But I do think Mormons were in the past and continue to be a religious minority (and the fact that they have historically troubled the boundaries of Christianity and been excluded from that by a lot of more mainstream Christians definitely contributes to that.) In the modern day, the statistics in terms of percentage of the American population are similar to Judaism, actually. There are slightly fewer Mormon Americans, about 1.5-2 percent of the population, whereas Jewish Americans are about 2-2.5 percent (though this includes people who identify as Jewish but not religiously observant.)
I feel like I'm rambling here, sorry. The point I was trying to make is that with Rebecca we do have an example of a historical doll who is a member of a (both historical and contemporary) religious minority and that minority is of relatively comparable size to Mormonism. Though I think in some ways a Jewish historical doll might be a more likely purchase for non-Jewish families than a Mormon historical doll would be for non-Mormons? I don't know if I can necessarily articulate why, though. Just a feeling. In terms of other differences I can't necessarily articulate--when Rebecca was released, having a historical character who was an Eastern European Jewish immigrant to New York City in the early 1900s felt like almost an obvious choice, as well as a necessary one. And if Rebecca hadn't been introduced, not having a Jewish historical doll would feel like a major oversight. On the contrary, if AG announced a Mormon historical doll I would be genuinely shocked. Like, knock me over with a feather shocked. I also don't feel like the lack of inclusion is a huge oversight in the way that not having a Jewish doll would be. (And, frankly, in the way the fact that they still don't have an Asian American historical doll is).
That being said, I definitely don't want to portray Mormonism as entirely inconsequential or peripheral to American history, as I don't believe it is. Mormonism is by far the largest religious tradition that originated in America and I think it overlays in really interesting ways with broader American historical issues like Westward expansion as well as issues around race, gender, religious freedom, and the boundaries of citizenship. I do think that a Mormon AG doll could potentially be very interesting. I also think it would be controversial and difficult to do well (by whatever standard "doing well" would be.)
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woniverse-writes · 1 year
Text
"Moth to a Flame (part 6)"
Bada Lee x Reader
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part 5 ⟵ part 6 ⟶ part 7
series masterlist
summary: y/n l/n is the youngest team member of Jam Republic, competing in the second season of Street Woman Fighter. she’s got the sweetest smile and the most vibrant personality, but she also may or may not be the biggest hothead on the show when it comes to defending her teammates. apparently that’s attractive to Bada Lee.
word count: 12k
warnings: swearing, angst, mentions of depression anxiety disorder, mentions of medication, not proofread, nothing i write is a reflection of anyone's true character and is a work of total fiction
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It had been almost a week since the interim mission check. Almost a week since 1 million was estimated to place first. A week since Jam Republic began preparing themselves for elimination. A week since Bada and Y/n fought… a week since the two had last spoken.
After the screaming match between the two girls and y/n making her exit with a slam of team Bebe's dressing room door, the younger headed to her own dressing room bawling her eyes out. Her teammates didn't immediately question anything as she stormed in and began to aggressively pack up the few things she had brought back for the day. Audrey made her way over to place a gentle hand on her shoulder
"y/n-" but was immediately swatted away by the still-crying girl. y/n immediately turned around with regret written all over her face
"I'm so sorry- I didn't- I didn't mean to push you away" she sobbed with wide eyes, shaking her head, trying to convince her friend that she didn't mean it, but Audrey already knew that. Audrey knew Y/n.
"hey, hey! It's okay, I know you didn't mean to…" she comforted the girl, bringing her into a hug. This time the younger girl let her friend wrap her in a warm hug. She buried her face in Audrey's chest and bawled her eyes out until she felt too tired to carry on.
"Is something else bothering you lovey?" Kirsten asked gently from somewhere in the corner. Y/n looked up slightly confused, which is when she realized they had no idea what just happened. She began to cry all over again, this time just weeping exhaustedly. I don't even think you could call it crying- more so just her looking sad as tears freely ran down her face. It took her a few minutes before she could even begin to explain, but when she did it wasn’t any easier.
“I got into an argument with Bada… well- it was actually a really bad fight, and- and I totally fucked everything up” Poor girl could barely finish her sentence, as she hiccuped her way through it before she started sobbing and heaving again. Everyone in the room shared looks of shock and confusion, all rushing closer to comfort their youngest. Audrey already had her hand rubbing circles softly on Y/n’s back while Emma sat on the other side rubbing her shoulder, and the oldest three kneeled/sat in front of her.
“I’m so sorry my sweet girl… do you wanna tell us about it?” Kirsten being the wonderful leader and friend she is, did not hesitate one second before openly trying to comfort y/n. The youngest sniffled and hiccuped a bit more while trying to nod.
“Y-yeah, just give me a-a few minutes, p-please” y/n shakily pleaded as her sobs picked back up. After about ten minutes of crying, she was pretty sure there was nothing left in her. Latrice had gotten up to get her water a few minutes ago and now was forcing her to drink it seeing as y/n had been able to calm down.
“Take your time baby, you don’t have to tell us everything- you don’t even have to tell us anything if you don’t want to!” Ling reassured her little bestie and made sure y/n still remembered how safe she was with Jam Republic.
“No, it’s okay- I want you guys to know… I just- I don’t even know where to start or how to retell this…or if I even have the energy to do so right now…” the youngest countered, wanting just to tell her members what happened and get it out of the way so she could begin suppressing it, but her eyes began to droop and her voice got soft, both being immediate signs of her exhaustion. And on any other day, or in any other situation her members would find it quite endearing, but they can’t help but feel crushed at the sight.
“Why don’t we finish packing- after the flight, you’ll have rested a bit, and if you’re feeling up to once we’ve landed you can explain the whole situation to us then. If not, that’s okay too.” Latrice gently spoke up, reminding everyone that they had a flight to leave for in just under an hour and a half. Y/n sniffled and nodded, slowly standing up. Everyone immediately backed away slightly to give her enough space, then watched as she lifelessly moved around the space, finishing packing her things. It sincerely shocked them to see her this way, thinking it was already pretty bad how she was acting before they showed up- and that was when they WEREN’T paying attention to her. Y/n was never good at hiding her feelings unless it was when she was dancing or performing- when she was putting on a show- so to see her so sluggish and empty really scared the five other members of Jam Republic.
“This is going to be a long, hard fucking week…” Emma noted, the others either nodding or tiredly humming in agreement.
________________
“Do you wanna talk about any of it?” Lusher tried her best not to pry- not that she would've had to pry much anyway since she heard the whole thing- but she wanted to hear how Bada was feeling with the aftermath. The leader just sighed deeply once again with her elbows resting on her knees, hunched over as she laid her head in her hands.
Bada felt nauseous. She felt dizzy, like the room was spinning and her ears were ringing. To be completely honest, there was a possibility she would pass out at any moment. None of what had just happened in the last- what? 20 minutes? Was it longer than that? Hell, was it shorter? Bada really had no clue, but none of what had happened in that time felt real to her.
“I don’t know Lusher…” the leader finally mumbled, still hunched over. It was quiet and meek, sounding exhausted. The sub-leader glanced around at her teammates whose faces were all some sort of variation of fear or anxiety, She sighed and crossed her arms before speaking up again
“Well, then how about we get some rest? Maybe afterward you’ll want to talk about it, or maybe you won’t- either way, we’ll be here…” She firmly stated, knowing how tired everyone was and how sleep easily played a role in how well they felt. The leader took a huge breath, her members watching had her shoulders rose and fell. Bada stood up with her head still hanging low. The other girls moved out of the way and watched as the oldest started groggily packing up her things and sat back down on the couch with an empty look when she finished.
“I’m ready when you guys are.”
____________
The first day back in New Zealand was just another segment added to the nightmare that Jam Republic has been living in these last few days. Y/n slept the whole plane ride but woke up with a very minor fever and headache. She just chalked it up to crying so much and getting so world up.
“I promise it’s fine Kirsten, I'm probably just dehydrated-” 
“Which still isn’t good! Even if that’s the case, it’s not something to treat lightly, y/n. And since I know you’re lying it’s even more serious to me… I need you to try your best to take care of yourself right now love, we need you.” she dragged the youngest over to some airport market and grabbed two waters and a bottle of juice. Kirsten glanced over her shoulder and saw eyeing up some snacks, but didn’t end up grabbing them. When the younger walked away to look at something else, the leader moved to grab whatever she was looking at. The bright colorful packaging with cute designs made her smile. It was obviously a very y/n-like treat- some sort of sweet gummies with a sour sugar coating. She grabbed two of them and got a savory snack as well, knowing how stubborn her youngest is and how hard on herself she can get.
When all of their luggage had been picked up, all six members of Jam Republic headed back to their hotel. y/n lay with her head against the cool glass of the window, not quite asleep but definitely not mentally present. Everyone was already worried from what had happened the previous day, but it seemed like something different was the issue now. Y/n didn’t only seem depressed anymore- she seemed physically ill.
By the time they arrived at their place, Emma was the first to offer y/n help, which she obviously declined. Yet Emma still took her heavier bags, and y/n didn’t even have the energy to complain. The older carried them up for her as she dragged behind the rest of the group. Audrey, noticing how out of it her best friend was, circled back around to meet y/n in the back of the clump
“You not feeling too good, bunny?” the slightly older brunette questioned with eyes full of concern, and a mouth of whatever candy bar she was munching on. Y/n actually felt herself smile a bit at how endearing her friend was. still, she sighed and nodded, which of course Audrey didn’t believe.
“I really don’t get why you feel like you have to lie about it…” the elder mumbled, kicking a rock while they walked. Great, now I made Audrey upset. y/n frowned and sighed deeply
“It’s just easier to deal with it by myself… it’s exhausting having to explain why I feel the way I do, especially when I don’t even understand it half the time… I wanna tell you guys, I promise I do, but it would drag the team down so much, Audrey…”
“Why do you say that? Because we’d have to take time to discuss what’s wrong? Because we’d have to stop working and focus on you for a second?”
“No Audrey it’s not-”
“Oh so then it’s because we care about you and we’d do anything for you in a heartbeat and you don’t wanna accept that you have people that sincerely love you? You don’t wanna accept that you really are a loveable amazing person who doesn’t deserve to be talked to or treated like that?” Audrey pointed off somewhere in the direction they had just come from, seething as she finished. this was the first time y/n had ever seen the girl as angry as she was, but she couldn’t help but feel confused
“How… how do you know what she said?” y/n tilted her head and awaited her friend’s response with said eyes. Audrey hesitated for a second, feeling like she’d said too much, but sighed and began speaking again
“Lusher told Latrice… well- Latrice and me. I still want to hear everything from you though- I want to know how you’re processing all this and how it felt for you because while she seemed neutral, there could just as easily be things Lusher left out in favor of Bada.” she quickly explained, hoping she hadn’t betrayed the other girl’s trust by getting the story from someone else first.
“Lusher didn’t seem… mad? Wait- how does she know? Did Bada really tell them everything already? I mean I guess that makes sense since-” her mumbled external pondering was cut off
“They heard everything…” the older of the two once again spoke hesitantly, unsure of how the other would react. y/n just glanced over, slightly dazed
“Huh?” Audrey let out a breath she didn’t even realize she was holding, then continued explaining.
“Lusher said their entire team was just around the corner while you guys were arguing, and they could hear everything…” she trailed off at the end, cringing slightly at how bad the entire situation was. Y/n sighed and closed her eyes, feeling another wave of headaches coming
“Great, now all of team Bebe hates me…”
“You don’t know that!” Audrey was simply trying to be her optimistic self, and she couldn’t help but giggle when the slightest bit of normal y/n showed through the depression when she gave her older friend an over-exaggerated deadpan look. The two finally reached their shared room and began unpacking the few things they had. After doing so, the girls all quickly washed up and got changed, then headed to practice.
Practice had gone well for the most part- the first half was reworking practically everything and adding more to make the choreography stand out more. The second half was just drilling everything until it was muscle memory, or at least close to it. Everyone could tell y/n wasn’t feeling well. It didn’t show in her dance, but definitely on her face as she looked miserable every time they finished.
“Why don’t you take a break hon-” Emma tried convincing her with a gentle hand on her shoulder, to which y/n loosely pushed it away
“Em, I’m fine” she whined and moaned, tired of having everyone baby her for the day. The older stood there for a moment before sighing and shaking her head, then walking off. The rest of the practice went the same, and everyone finished wrapping things up around 12:45 am. 
Later that evening (or morning rather) after practice had ended and all of Jam Republic had returned to their hotel, y/n started throwing up and her fever increased severely, ending her up in the ER at 2 am with Kirsten and Ling, the others being told to stay back and get some rest.
“After running some tests and talking with her, it just seems like a stress fever, which thankfully means there’s nothing physically wrong- well besides some dehydration, but we have her on an IV for right now- However, whatever is causing the girl so much stress should probably be taken out of her life immediately…” the doctor sternly informed the two oldest members of Jam Republic. They both just looked at each other, not really knowing what to do, seeing as their poor baby’s stress was unavoidable right now unless she were to completely drop from the challenge, and maybe even the entire competition as a whole.
“We’re actually a part of a competition right now… we want her to rest but- we need her to be able to compete with us. Is there anything we can do to speed up the recovery?” Ling spoke before her friend could, the desperate tone already taking over her voice. The doctor sighs and takes off his glasses.
“We could try putting her on an anti-anxiety medication to see if that helps… but it really would be the most ideal to let her rest as much as possible in a low-stress environment.”
“A low-stress environment isn’t really possible right now. And- she’s actually already on something for anxiety and depression, would she even be allowed to do that?” at Kirsten’s question the doctor looks slightly confused
“Has she not been taking the medication recently? Because when we ran the tests to see if there was something in her system, we found no traces of drugs, alcohol, or any substances…” The two dancers once again looked at each other, having a silent conversation.
“Would we be able to see her?” the leader asks softly, to which the doctor nods and leads them to y/n’s room. He opens the door and they find her lying there staring off into space, barely awake.
“Hey honey… is it alright if we come in?” Kirsten asked as softly as she could while still wanting the girl to hear her. Y/n nodded wordlessly and closed her eyes. The two oldest Jam Republic members came and sat near her hospital bed and after a few minutes of conversation with the doctor, it was just the three of them in the room. 
“Sweetheart…” the leader brushed some hair out of y/n’s face and watched as her eyes fluttered open
“Did you hear any of that?” She finished and furrowed her brows, unsure of how aware of her surroundings the younger was. Y/n shook her head and matched Kirsten’s expression
“They’re gonna keep you here overnight to make sure you get enough hydration before going back, okay?” She kept brushing away stray hairs and petting them down softly against y/n’s head, lulling her to sleep. There was a slight nod of understanding. Kirsten stood up and y/n quickly (as quickly as she could) reached out to grab her hand
“Please stay… at least one of you… can at least one of you please stay with me” the youngest pleaded in a pitiful whisper that made the older two’s hearts break all over again. This girl really was going to be the death of them all
“Of course honey, we’ll both stay” Ling reaches for her other hand pressing a motherly kiss to the back of it 
“I’m sorry… for slowing down the process and now dragging you guys into it… you should be getting good rest right now… not here with me… and here I am being selfish by asking you to stay… shocker…” It seemed like y/n was just mumbling whatever was coming to mind, yet tears were once again freely slipping down. Her eyes closed and wet eyelashes fluttered softly against her cheeks as she drifted off. The two sat there in slight shock, a bit taken aback by what she’d said. Both had wanted to say something and let her know how wrong she was- how while yes they should’ve been resting, it was more important to them that she was okay. After a few minutes of silence, Ling spoke up
“Why didn’t you tell her she can’t practice?”
“Because now is not the time to send her into a nervous breakdown… she’s barely even conscious, it’d probably give her a heart attack if I told her she wasn’t allowed to practice” the leader stressed and hung her head for a moment.
“We’re gonna have to ask her about her medication in the morning…” she sighed rubbing her forehead, causing Ling the groan softly so as not to disrupt the sleeping girl a few inches away
The next day Kirsten woke up first and told a half-asleep Ling she was going to grab breakfast for them. When she returned, it seemed the older had been awake for a bit and that y/n had just been waking up. The leader sat in the chair next to the hospital bed and handed everyone their food. y/n thanked her teammate quietly and they all began eating. After a few brief moments of silence and soft chewing, Kirsten spoke up
“So there are a few things we need to talk about…” she mentioned seriously, glancing up at y/n who was staring intensely at her food, but had stopped chewing for the moment.
“...like what?” the younger questioned and went back to cutting up her food to eat more.
“Like why you haven’t been telling us things… we need to know when you aren’t feeling well y/n or else we can’t help you-” Kirsten explained in a worried motherly tone but was quickly cut off 
“I don’t want you to have to help me-” the bedridden girl argued tiredly and sighed. There wasn’t any anger and she didn’t raise her voice in the slightest. She was just exhausted. 
“I should be able to take care of myself on my own. I’m an adult… i should start acting like one” y/n spoke everything loud and clear until the last phrase. She had mumbled the statement to herself, sinking back into her pillows and wallowing in pity again, but Ling and Kirsten both heard the self-deprecating callout. Every second that passed, the two eldest grew more and more worried about their youngest’s wellbeing 
“The doctors said they didn’t didn’t find any traces of anything in your system, which is good, but that also included your meds… did you forget to take them yesterday?” Ling questioned softly rubbing the back of the girl’s hand. Y/n once again goes completely silent, and avoids eye contact with an extremely guilty expression, which has both older members raising an eyebrow.
“Y/n… what’s up?” Kirsten pushed for a response, causing the younger dancer to sigh
“I haven’t been taking them regularly…” Y/n mumbled, fiddling with the blanket that laid over her lap, still avoiding eye contact.
“You haven’t been taking your meds???” “Y/n are you fucking kidding me? Since when?” both members started began outwardly stressing
“...since the second week of filming-”
“THAT WAS THREE AND A HALF MONTHS AGO-”
“Lingy, let’s not yell at her… I’m sure she had a reason…” Kirsten put a hand on her shoulder and the oldest sighed, they both turned expectantly to y/n, who felt immensely small in front of them for the first time in her entirety of knowing the two dancers.
“...they were making me tired” The youngest curled into her and cringed at the excuse, especially after seeing both women’s faces drop into disbelief.
“Are you serious right now?” Ling questioned with a deadpan expression her arms crossed. Y/n bit her lip and continued to play with her fingers.
“y/n…” Kirsten sighed as she closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose
“I started that new medication and it made it impossible for me to do anything! I was barely making it through those battles and the only thing keeping me going was the excitement and adrenaline-” The youngest tried to defend her reasoning but what cut off
“So you thought it was better to just take nothing? Why didn’t you say something to someone, or even just call your doctor and ask to go back-” This was the first time Kirsten even slightly raised her voice at y/n, and it wasn’t even at that point, but the small girl could feel the disappointment radiating off of her team leader, and she felt everything come crashing again.
“Because I didn’t want to go back to the other medication, it did nothing for me- I wouldn’t have switched in the first place if it worked!” she could feel herself getting worked up again, tears somehow still being able to form. She sighed and laid back in the hospital bed, actually crying this time instead of having tears judge freely fall down her face as she stared blankly.
“I know I shouldn’t have stopped taking them… but I just couldn’t do it. I thought I was doing fine…” y/n mumbled, wiping away tears and sniffling, feeling exhausted again.
“Y/n…” Kirsten started after taking a deep breath and hearing the younger girl’s hum of recognition 
“You can’t practice.”
“What…” barely came out as a whisper 
“You’re too stressed out right now, and your immune system is down… you aren’t eating or sleeping properly and you’re overworking yourself. You are literally killing yourself slowly… and for what? A stupid competition? Some girl?” she tried to keep her tone level and calm, but Kirsten couldn’t help the rise at the mention of the other team leader, hating her in that brief moment for being one of the reasons her poor baby was feeling this way
“If it’s so stupid Kirsten, then why are we here?” Y/n could feel herself getting frustrated again. This was exactly why no one took her seriously, because her team didn’t even take her seriously, or at least that’s what she thought. Kirsten let out what felt like the twelve hundredth sigh within the last 24 hours.
“They’re discharging you in about 20 minutes… you’re allowed to come to practice but it’s recommended that you don’t… the doctors said it’s best to keep you out of high-stress environments right now-“ 
“Yeah well, do they even know what’s going on?” so many things were happening in the moment. Y/n felt like she was going to combust and throw up and pass out all at once. She’d never spoken to Kirsten like this- fuck she’d never felt frustrated with Kirsten like this. 
“Yes y/n, we told them, and they still think it’s best for you to rest… at least for a little while” The leader’s tone was back to gentle, but it sounded just as tired as the younger girl’s. Y/n didn’t say anything as she sat in disbelief. The three sat in silence for the next few minutes until it was time for y/n to be discharged. She signed off on some documents and then the three were off. They decided to head back to the hotel first before meeting the others at the studio, wanting to change and all that since they’d all spent the night at the hospital in their pajamas. 
Y/n decided to stay back and get some more rest, finally giving in to her exhaustion. While they were glad she was taking their advice, Ling and Kirsten once again couldn’t help but feel their hearts hurt for their youngest members. It was always hard seeing each other go through tough times, but it usually never lasted this long or became this severe. It felt like there was nothing they could do to help her.
The youngest jam republic dancer napped and rested for about five hours after she had made her return to their hotel. After waking up she showered and got dressed and decided to head down to the studio. When y/n arrived she waved and greeted everyone politely with a gentle smile, shocking everyone at her appearance.
“I thought you weren’t coming today- you said you were gonna rest.” Kirsten separated herself from the group after telling them to keep practicing
“I did rest- but I couldn’t just sit there and do nothing… even if I don’t feel well I should still come and watch to make sure I’m not missing anything” y/n defended her case to the best of her ability, but Kirsten was always right
“No, if you don’t feel well you need to be resting and taking care of your body AND your brain” the leader retorted, teasingly poking the younger girl’s forehead at the end of her sentence to make a point. Y/n cracked the tiniest smile and even though it was barely there Kirsten was proud of herself for at least being able to do that much.
Y/n sat at the front and watched the practice for the remainder of the time, taking notes on everything she saw whether it be strengths or weaknesses, new ideas, or things she felt needed to be changed entirely. The girl was surprisingly calm and didn’t feel any stress while she was observing. That’s pretty much how the rest of that week’s practices went for Y/n until the last three days before filming. She had been begging Kirsten to allow her to get back to dancing and the leader actually almost caved a few times, desperate to perfect the routine, but still stayed strong and insisted she rested.
____________
It had been a week since the two had spoken. By now all the choreography was finished being created, taught, and perfected. The videos were all shot and edited and it was finally the day where all seven teams would present their work to everyone else and the judges. The day when another two crews would be put up for elimination, and once would go home. 
Everyone entered the arena one by one, each team taking their designated seat. It was always mindlessly interesting in these situations, where they’d all gather to watch something but not dance because the fashion choices were truly a show of each dancer’s honest character. Y/n looked as elegant as usual with her red, black, and ivory ensemble. She was doing surprisingly well at the moment, having more of an icy glare rather than the empty eyes of depression that had taken over her the last week or so. 
Y/n was doing surprisingly well until she wasn't. Jam Republic is seated by the time team Bebe passes by. y/n feels her heart rate pick up as they approach, all of them glancing at her, some glaring, but their leader acted as if she didn't even see the girl and walked right past them with an icy stare.
“Oh, now that’s just fucking mean” Ling scoffed and stared down the team as they took their seats. Everyone was obviously feeling on edge and very nervous about the results, but y/n still looked quite ill. She had recovered for the most part, but she suddenly felt like throwing up again at the interaction with Bebe. She's still so distraught from the fight with Bada a couple of days before, and now the youngest dancer is scared shitless that both of their teams are going to be up for elimination. As much as she wants to avoid the older girl right now, y/n wouldn't be able to live with herself if Bebe got sent home today…
y/n took a sharp breath, biting her lip trying to push back the sudden sting of tears already feeling the anxiety begin to gnaw away at her. Lusher noticed this right as the team took their seats and spoke over her shoulder to their leader. 
"you can't keep ignoring her…" the younger prompted after seeing the way Bada pretended y/n didn't exist when they passed by
"excuse me? Who are you to tell me what I can and can't do?" the leader coldly responded, eyeing the girl up and down. Tatter felt a shiver run down her spine at the interaction, already worried about the integrity of her team considering the rest of their practice time felt like a waste as well. She just sighed and tilted her head out of stress.
After the fight between Bada and Y/n happened, and they both went their separate ways alongside their teams, team Bebe began to fall apart. Bada read through the countless criticisms their routine had gotten and didn’t even know where to start. The stress was eating her alive and she tried her best not to let it show. Normally when things got bad, the Bebe leader would talk about it with Y/n, but that obviously wasn’t a possibility right now, which made everything so much worse. 
Practices became unbearable due to how irritable the leader had become, often losing patience easily when things didn’t work out how they were supposed to. Any time they’d go on break Bada would sit and rewatch whatever footage had been taken or reread the notes to see what was going wrong. The other six Bebe members sat off to the side getting water, all observing their oldest with immense concern. She still hadn’t opened up about the situation to them, honestly feeling too embarrassed, even though she knew they heard the entire thing. The guilt of it all was eating away at Bada and she didn’t want to admit that.
“She’s gonna have to share the burden with us at some point” Lusher sighed and pushed herself up off the floor, sauntering over to their crew leader and popping a squat next to her
“You haven’t had any water today…” the sub-leader observed while glancing at the taller girl
“You’re seriously keeping track of whether I do or don’t drink water?” it was supposed to come out in a joking manner, but Bada was serious, the sentence coming out flat and irritated. She didn’t look up from the sheets of paper she was looking over when she responded as well, completely focused on fixing the issue that she couldn’t seem to understand.
“Yeah I am- because you’ve stopped taking care of yourself and you won’t let anyone help you” Lusher snapped back, causing Bada to finally look up and meet her harsh gaze. The younger dancer’s arms were crossed and her brows were furrowed, making her look more like a pouty child than an angry adult, but still Bada could feel the frustration radiating off of her. She sighed and stood up, tall stature looming over Lusher for a second before she stood as well.
“Talk to me… this isn’t gonna work if you take everything on yourself” the shorter once again encouraged her teammate to share her troubles. Bada sighed and the two stared at each other for a moment before Lusher turned her head slightly to call out for Tatter. The blonde came bounding over with a somewhat nervous look on her face
“What’s up?” she asked
“You think you’d be able to run things by yourself for a bit?” Lusher questioned in return, causing Bada to cock her head a little, not entirely fond of the idea. But the way the youngest director confidently responds makes her feel a little better about it. The other responds with a quick ‘great’ and a smile, before dragging Bada out of the practice room and slightly down the hall to one of the small dancer lounges.
“Alright- let’s hear it.” Lusher claps her hands together as she sits on the couch and crosses one leg over the other. The leader lets out an amused scoff and shakes her head. She sits down on the other side of the couch and leans on the armrest.
“I just feel stressed about the routine… we’re taking a big risk with what we’re doing and I can’t help but wonder if it’s the right approach…” Lusher eyed her suspiciously, not fully believing the leader
“So it has nothing to do with Y/n?” she tilted her head and raised an eyebrow, the leader huffing at the question
“Well of course it has plenty to do with Y/n- we didn’t exactly leave off on good terms the last time we talked… it’s just more unnecessary added stress that I need to stop thinking about and move past.” Bada finished her reasoning in a reserved manner, looking away from the girl next to her
“Woah- wait- you think that’s really something you should just ignore??” Lusher was genuinely shocked, not used to her leader being so avoidant. Maybe it was her way of trying to remain relaxed and cool, but the younger dancer could see how terribly the whole situation was affecting her friend, and it definitely wasn’t something to just be left alone.
“Well, I have better things to worry about right now than some childish dancer who clearly can’t control her emotions” the shorter girl scoffed completely unamused 
“This is coming from the person who blew up on her just as easily- come on Bada, you’ve never been a hypocrite so don’t start now” She couldn’t help but laugh a little at how childish the leader was being without even realizing it 
“So you’re taking her side now?” Bada looked pretty offended, telling the other dancer just how serious she was with her question. Lusher sighed deeply
“I’m not taking anyone’s side, but you both were really shitty to each other… neither of you should’ve said the things you said- but by you saying how immature and emotional she is, you’re pretty much saying it all about yourself because you two had the same energy going on…” she tried to explain calmly, which resulted in another immature response from the leader
“I was simply matching her energy-” Bada pouted as she talked, and Lusher usually would’ve found it cute if it were any other situation
“Right, which by your definition was childish and irrational…” the leader scoffed and looked away, playing with her sleeve. There were a few moments of silence 
“You know she’s not doing well either…” the sub-leader spoke up after a while
“Yeah? And how would you know?” the taller girl mumbled, still not looking away from her sleeve, finding the loose string much more interesting than the conversation at this point
“Uhm, I asked her?” she posed it as a question, but it was meant in a sarcastic way, pointing out the obvious answer. Bada quickly snapped her head back up to finally look over at the younger girl
“Oh, so you’ve been talking to Y/n?” Lusher sighed again after seeing her friend’s irritated expression make a return
“Of course I have, she’s our friend- well she’s my friend, I don't know what she is to you” she responded softly and sincerely, yet mumbled the last part, causing the leader to scoff for probably the thirteenth time during this conversation
“C’mon Seoyoung, be serious right now- this isn’t the time for your silly little delusions-” Bada tried to joke slightly and steer her away from the door they were about to open
“No, you be serious Bada. you know damn well she’s more important to you than you’d like to admit. If I didn’t know any better I’d say you were practically in love with her.” the older of the two let out a laugh of disbelief at her teammate’s (accurate) accusation
“In love? With y/n? That hilarious Lusher- really funny actually. I’d love to know where your brain comes up with things like that.” her tone was low and sarcastic, becoming mean and condescending, similar to how it was the last time she spoke with Y/n
“Oh don’t fucking talk to me like that- you’re not gonna treat me like I’m an idiot because I know you better than that. Stop putting your insecurities onto the people who care most about you when they’re trying to help Bada” The room went silent and the older stood straight up in her place, eyes softening at the callout. It was strange to hear Lusher talk to her like that, or even hear her talk like that at all. Sure, the girl teased her a lot, but the two had never gotten into a serious back-and-forth argument like this. Bada thought at that moment that maybe she really could be the problem, seeing as how no one else had been getting into screaming matches like she had recently.
“I just don’t understand why she couldn’t just talk to me…” Bada mumbled sadly burying her head in her arms
“Because she was stressed out and hurt… I mean- if my girlfriend voted to eliminate my group, I would be hurt too-” Lusher tried easing the mood with some light teasing
“Seoyoung…” the older girl dramatically glared at her, but both knew the look held no real malice
“Okay my bad- sorry, but you get the point.” she rushed out in turn
“I do, but she said she understood…” the leader once again drifted off, focus going elsewhere
“Okay, and? She can understand your reason and still be upset about it. Especially since there were other things that were probably weighing down on her… you have to remember, we weren’t the only ones who voted to eliminate Jam Republic… EVERYONE voted for them… and since they had already been facing setbacks from the moment they got to New Zealand she was probably struggling a lot-” Lusher tried to help her understand, but Bada wasn’t having it
“yeah, she was struggling but I was too- you didn’t see me taking it out on her did you?” she tried to retort, but was met with Lusher’s immediate response
“but you did take it out on her! Just not immediately…” 
“Lusher you saw everything- you know how hard everything was for me-“ and it was true, lusher did see everything, just like she’s seeing it now. She witnessed one of her best friends completely lose her confidence and doubt all of her abilities while keeping it bottled up. But she was the only one who saw.
“Right, but she didn’t, Bada… How is she supposed to know that if you don’t tell her-”
“She didn’t tell me anything!” it felt like an argument was starting again. The older of the two truly not seeing the whole problem, or at least not recognizing her part in it
“Right, but you pushed her to talk about something she didn’t want to share with you- why? I don’t know- but that’s none of my business! YOU need to figure out what went wrong…” Lusher explained from the objective point of view
“I get that, but how is it fair for her to shut me out and then get bitchy with me, but when I do it in return that’s not okay?”
“Oh my god- Bada, it wasn’t okay for either of you to act that way! But your retaliating after pressuring y/n to talk about something she wasn’t ready to talk about seems like your own fault…you were so fucking mean to her Bada- like- the things you said were awful and absolutely not okay!” The younger of the two allowed her voice to increase, finally getting her point across. Lusher watched as Bada’s face softened again, feeling like she finally got through to her, even just a little bit.
“...I know” The older hung her head and covered her eyes, as Lusher sighed and sat down next to her, leaning her head on Bada’s shoulder.
“I know she treated you badly too, what she said wasn’t okay either- but it wasn’t charged like yours was” Bada scoffed and wiped her tears that she didn’t even realize had fallen
“yeah, and how do you know?” she shifted slightly to glance down at the younger girl, but Lusher just kept staring off into the space ahead of them
“Well- maybe at first it was a little bit… but at some point, she had already given up on fighting and just wanted to get out of there… believe me, Bada, she knows how bad she fucked up too…”
That week had been just as terrible for Team Bebe as it had been for Jam Republic. The last day before filming they ended up making drastic changes to really sell the concept, causing everyone to be exhausted the next day, but luckily they were all able to hold off until after filming had finished.
The team now sat in their designated area, everyone carrying a very negative intimidating intense energy, except Lusher who was just exhausted from still having to play the mediator at this point. After all teams have settled in and the production staff is ready to go, Kang Daniel begins recapping the mission for the audience members and announces the first concept shortly after. Deep n Dap’s video was shown first.
Y/n felt another wave of depression rush over her as she watched the video. It was so well organized and put together, and hearing how loud everyone else was cheering for the green team made her feel nauseous all over again. Yet the young dancer was able to preserve her face and not let her anxiety show, although she didn’t make a single sound or expression for the entire video. Once Deep n Dap’s score was revealed the entire team of Jam Republic began to get nervous seeing how high all three directors had scored.
Shortly after, it was Jam Republic’s turn. Kirsten had been asked about their rehearsal process and was only able to get a few words out before she started tearing up. The leader finally showed her tears, and Y/n hung her head holding her breath knowing she'd cry too if she didn't. When the score for Jam Republic’s leader was shown, y/n felt herself genuinely smile for the first time in three days.
Once the video started and everyone was cheering, y/n felt herself start to lighten up a little- but was also still frustrated at the circumstances- seeing as they all had no faith in Jam Republic and now here they are cheering for them. Witnessing how well the video turned out after all their trials and efforts, and how much everyone loved the individual parts really made Y/n feel so much better. It shocked everyone slightly that y/n wasn't showcased or highlighted at all, but they had no problem pointing her out since she still stood out due to her energy.
“Oh- Y/n didn’t have any highlights?” Redlic commented as the applause died down
“I guess they weren’t able to give her something with all the idea changes…” To be completely honest, Y/n didn’t want a highlight. When the crew began reworking their choreography and it came to the segment that had featured the youngest dancer, Y/n told Latrice to cut it. She was still not allowed to practice at the time and felt it was unfair to the other dancers and her team.
It actually made Bada feel really bad about herself- because, for the first time since meeting the girl, she was glad y/n wasn't in the spotlight. When the leader realized she was thinking this way it made her feel even worse about the situation, knowing how hard this all was on the younger girl, and she did nothing but make that worse for her. She felt conflicted the entire time watching the video- while she was mostly glad she didn’t have to watch Y/n be in the center of attention and was able to avoid accidentally reacting to how pretty she was; Bada was also annoyed that she wasn’t showcasing her talents like she normally did. Knowing how skilled the young dancer was, her presence alone probably would’ve guaranteed Jam Republic a win, so what reason was there for her not to be given her own part?
The other two scores were revealed and the team felt immense pride. However, any relief Y/n was feeling was ripped away just as quickly as it arrived. Daniel announced the 100-point deduction from Kirsten’s score due to them failing to meet the minimum amount of required dancers and y/n felt her stomach drop. The gasp she let out was followed by tears although she managed to push them back- she truly thought she was going to be sick. Y/n had to physically cover her mouth, to avoid letting out a sob or to stop herself from throwing up? She doesn’t even know. This poor girl is literally internally losing her shit and having a mental breakdown over the fact that they could lose to deep n dap.
Moments pass as Daniel re-explains the extra concept points that would be rewarded to the crew that executed the outdoor concept better according to the judges. When it was revealed that Jam Republic won the points Y/n burst into tears and covered her face with both hands as her shoulders shook with sobs. 
“Ahhh the baby” Amy whined in sympathy, pouting along with Redy and Lia
“She must’ve been so stressed” Waackxy pouted as she and her teammates nodded
“DON’T CRYYYYYY” Lusher was the only one from Bebe to shout out to her, the others kind of just side-eyeing her
“What? She still deserves comfort… she’s not a bad person, she just did a not good thing… I wouldn’t even call it a bad thing” The sub-leader sternly eyed up her teammates, then her leader, already tired of how they were acting.
"she cries too much" Bada was mumbling to herself but made sure to say it loud enough for the girl in front of her to hear. Lusher whipped around and pursed her lips, her nostrils flaring as she forced herself to take deep breaths
"For someone who got into an argument over immaturity, you're acting really childish." the younger of the two whispered calmly, but everyone could feel the rage simmering in her. She turned back around and her face immediately reverted back to one of pride for the pink team.
“Y/n, you were extremely ill during the second half of the rehearsal process-” Bada tilted her head, eyebrows furrowing in confusion and concern at Daniel’s words. She was sick? Is she okay now?
“How do you feel that impacted your overall performance?” the host questioned after Kirsten and Emma had finished giving their speeches. The youngest member sniffed and wiped her tears as she was handed the microphone, taking a deep breath before speaking
“Well…” she sighed and felt more tears coming
“It was extremely difficult for me personally, obviously… but I couldn’t help but feel like a burden to my team…” the youngest member let out a sob as she tried to finish her sentence. Audrey rubbed her back, comforting her friend.
“So I did my best to attentively take notes and help where I could, while actively reviewing the choreography until I was well enough to perfect it on my own…” Y/n was able to finish more stably after taking a few deep breaths and calming herself down. Daniel nodded and smiled sympathetically before thanking her and moving on.
“Wow… she taught herself everything in her own time and practiced it less than the others… and still looked that good???” NOB cocked her head, genuinely stunned by how dedicated and talented the youngest Jam Republic member was.
After 1 Million and Mannequeen’s videos were both shown and scores were revealed, announcing that 1 Million had taken the win, it was time to move on to the all-gender concept groups. Lady Bounce’s video was shown first, and they scored extremely well, seeing as it was well executed and had a lot of energy. The team had received a generally positive reaction during interim checks and also finished off strong with positive feedback from the judges. Both Bebe's and Y/n’s nerves were beginning to rise.
When it came time for Bebe’s video to play, everyone was interested to see what the team did with the feedback. Since Jam Republic was seemingly able to come back from near-elimination, the other crews were curious to see if Bebe would be able to do the same, or if they would simply take the other team’s place as the least impressive performance.
Right off the bat, Y/n was already distraught. The amount of partner work really threw her for a loop because it wasn’t like that before… and she literally thought she was gonna burst into tears again. She knew it was obviously just acting, but the young dancer still hated it and lowkey felt like it was a punishment, even though it clearly wasn’t. 
The entire time, she watched with a heavy heart. It was so good and she couldn’t even tell anyone how proud she was of them, especially Bada, so Y/n just there and silently let tears roll down her face the whole time. Her eyes were on Bada as soon as it ended. She of course didn’t look her way, but y/n continued to clap as hard as she could, knowing if she were to open her mouth and cheer she’d probably let out a sob
“It was just really good… I’m glad it turned out so well” she said wiping her tears and putting on a very fake smile trying her hardest to look happy and not utterly heartbroken, knowing how the camera picked up every reaction. Audrey once again patted her friend’s back and gave her a sympathetic smile. When Bebe’s score was shown everyone was shocked to see that it was lower than Lady Bounce’s- not by a ton, but still lower. Y/n felt her heart rate start to pick up, getting nervous at the thought of Bebe losing the whole challenge and ending in the elimination battle.
Bada started her speech well but only got about two words in before feeling a surge of emotions. She quickly recognized the hard work of her team and spoke on how she would continue to improve and grow as a director, before affirming it all with a nod and handing the microphone back over. Wolf’Lo’s performance followed, and Y/n wasn’t shocked at all when she continued to be unimpressed by the group’s work. However, despite her exhaustion and anxiety, the youngest Jam Republic member was still able to pull out an expressive reaction to the orange team scoring higher than Bebe.
“That’s fucking ridiculous…” Y/n glared at the screen, unable to hide her distaste. Emma snorted at the girl’s reaction
“Good to see you haven’t lost your judgment” the older girl teasingly smirked at her teammate who just smiled lightly and shook her head. Daniel moves on to announcing which of the three teams received the bonus points for executing their concept the best. Ladybounce took the win and y/n began to panic more seeing that Bebe came in last out of the three. When they showed the current rankings based on judges' scores, she was relieved Jam Republic wasn’t at risk for elimination, seeing Bebe in sixth place had her head spinning. She was really hoping the audience votes would keep her safe and boost Bebe in the ranks as well.
The host began announcing the final ranks for the mission, after adding in audience votes and views. 1 Million placed first, not surprising anyone, since their performance was practically flawless. Jam Republic was called for second place and all six of the members felt the tension leave their bodies, even though their safety was guaranteed by their win. Audrey put her arm around y/n and the girl was able to smile a little bit more at their victory, still not completely present in the moment due to how much of a nervous wreck she was for Bada and her team. Now that Y/n knew she was one hundred percent safe, she should’ve felt relieved, but no such feeling came.
While the other members debated who tied with Mannequeen for third between Ladybounce and Bebe, y/n just continued to lay with her head on Audrey’s shoulder, totally zoned out. Ladybounce won and the youngest jam member tensed up while applauding, not moving from her teammate's shoulder. When Bebe is announced as fifth it takes y/n a second to come out of her daze, and when she does she sits straight up and feels tears sting her eyes again. She’s able to hold them back as she applauds, finally feeling genuine relief knowing that the team is safe.
Bada was handed the mic to give her speech, and much like everyone else who had held the microphone at one point today, she began to tear up. Of course, all the natural stress and anxiety of the challenge and competition as a whole had gotten to her, but everything had hit so much harder since she wasn’t able to share any of it with Y/n. The leader felt tears rush faster, no matter how hard she tried to keep them back. After taking a few deep breaths and racing some encouraging pats on the back from her team, Bada was able to speak up
“I’m glad we always scored well in previous missions, but it was a lot of pressure going into this knowing how high the standards were for us…” the tall leader started off 
“It’s really all thanks to the members for keeping things going while i wasn’t at my best, so thank you. We’ll continue to keep showing great performances.” Bada finished with a firm not and grateful smile, evoking applause from the other teams. Deep n Dap and Wolf’Lo place in sixth and seventh by default, meaning they are the two teams up for elimination. Daniel announces that both teams are free to go prepare for the battles now and everyone disperses, heading back to their individual hideouts. Jam Republic is one of the last groups to head up to their room, along with Mannequeen, seeing as the two were hyping each other’s videos up.
“Oh shit- I think I left my phone down there…” Y/n sighed in annoyance after feeling around for her phone and not finding it
“Do you want me to come with you to check?” Emma offered, but the younger just shook her head
“No, it’s okay. I’ll meet you guys back in the room” she replied and the others nodded, then they both parted ways. Y/n went back down to the fight zone area, looking around Jam Republic’s seating for her phone, finally finding it next to the bleachers. As she heads back up and begins going down the hall, someone rounds the corner nearly bumping into her.
“Oh- I’m sorry” Y/n meekly whispers at the taller blonde, who at first was glaring down at her, but softened her gaze once she realized how terrible the girl looked. Even under all the stage makeup she had on, Y/n’s eyes were slightly sunken in and didn’t hold the same sparkle they usually did
“It’s fine…” Tatter somewhat dryly responded. Neither of them moved, both simply staring at each other for moments. The older of the two felt the urge to at least create some small talk between them, also harboring some guilty feelings for being cold toward the Jam Republic member.
“How have you been?” she crosses her arms and tries to sound relaxed, not wanting the other girl to feel uncomfortable. Y/n didn’t really know what to say, as she stood stuttering for a few moments, debating whether or not to answer truthfully
“well… I’ve definitely been better” is ultimately what she decides to say. Tatter frowns and her shoulders slump as she sighs
“I’m sorry…” y/n gives her a tight-lipped smile in return, hoping that would be the end, as the whole thing felt incredibly awkward. Yet the older sighed again and continued
“I’m actually sorry for some other things too… I’m sorry for not reaching out to check on you and for being so bitchy. I just saw how distraught Bada was after the whole situation between you two, and I didn’t even stop for a moment to think you could be doing worse… so I’m really sorry y/n” Tatter gently explained with genuine sorrow in her eyes. The other dancer was touched by the apology and a bit taken aback as well
“Thank you Tatter… I really appreciate it. These last few days have been miserable, especially since fighting with Bada… I understand you guys not wanting to talk to me or other things like that because I said some pretty terrible things-” the blonde cut her off with a scoff of a laugh
“Yeah well, you definitely weren’t the only one… I’d even argue that what Bada said was much worse” she strongly retorted, causing the younger girl to sigh and look down
“I know… but I kinda deserved it” Y/n quietly replied feeling her throat begin to close up at the memory
“Not really… I mean sure- you were being an annoying brat, and maybe a tiny bit selfish in the moment, definitely petty-” the other girl calmly argued
“Okay Tatter, was there a point you were trying to make?” the blonde laughed at her friend’s sarcasm, glad to see the slightest smile on the girl’s face, making it known that she wasn’t taking any of it personally
“What I’m trying to say is that even though you were having a rough moment, how Bada dealt with it was absolutely not the right way to go about it. Of course, you were both at fault, but she took it too far.” Tatter finished seriously with a small shake of her head. There was another moment of silence before she began speaking again, shifting the topic slightly
“I bet dealing with this didn’t make it any easier for you to get better, huh?” the older asked in regard to Y/n getting sick and having to continue working on the mission while trying to recover
“No, I actually think it’s part of the reason I got so sick… because I was so stressed out over everything already and that was like- my final straw” The two laughed softly at Y/n’s slightly dramatic statement. Tatter pouts playfully, yet feels genuine heartache for her two friends.
“Things will get better,  believe me… she misses you, she’s just so fucking stubborn” Tatter grimaced at the thought of her hard-headed leader and how she’s currently refusing to accept her guilt, causing the tiniest saddest smile to show on y/n’s face.
“I should probably get back to my group now…” the younger softly commented looking down somewhat sadly at her shoes. Tatter hugged her without hesitation and felt Y/n tense up at first, but the short girl quickly relaxed and wrapped her arms around the other in return. They said their goodbyes and right as the blonde watched Y/n turn the corner, she felt a tap on her shoulder and whipped around to see her own teammate.
“what took you so long?” Lusher questioned staring down at the still-empty water bottle the girl said she was going to fill up about 15 minutes ago. Tatter hesitated for a second before deciding it was better to just be honest
“...I was talking to Y/n” she watched as her older teammate’s eyes lit up slightly
“Oh? About?” Lusher curiously and somewhat suspiciously inquired, hoping it would be something good and not about how Tatter decided to beat the shit out of the other girl
“Nothing really, just checking in on her…” the two continued their conversation as they finally began heading back towards their hideout
“Oh, so you’re finally done glaring at her? Good!” the blonde laughed rolling her eyes at the older girl’s sarcasm
“Yeah… I apologized for being bitchy and then we talked a bit about how stressed she was and how it didn’t help when she got sick…” Lusher visibly relaxed at the younger dancer's truthful retelling of the conversation, feeling a bit more at peace knowing she wasn’t alone anymore in the “getting Bada to stop hating Y/n” battle
“I still can’t believe she got so worked up and stressed that she ended up in the hospital” Lusher nonchalantly replied, stopping Tatter in her tracks
“What??” the blonde exasperated, stuck a few steps behind behind the older dancer. Lusher looked around, confused for a moment until she remembered that she was the only one who knew
“Oh yeah, Y/n wound up in the hospital almost as soon as they got back to New Zealand. The doctors said she was so overworked and anxious that it was making her physically ill- that’s why she wasn’t allowed to practice or even be in the rehearsal space at time” Lusher briefly explained the whole situation to her teammate, who stood there with her jaw dropped
“How did you even find this out??” Tatter questioned, still baffled. Lusher’s face went from calm to somewhat guilty for a second
“Well… I had been trying to get in contact with Y/n to see how she was doing, but she wasn’t responding to any of my calls or texts. So I texted Latrice and she explained what was going on, and also made me aware that by texting her, I was lowkey stressing Y/n out more…” she finished with an embarrassed smile, knowing that she and Y/n were okay now and that she didn’t have to feel guilty about it anymore. Tatter scoffed in amusement, shaking her head as they both finally entered their team’s room.
“It took you two long enough!”
____________
After everyone had been given a break while Deep n Dap and Wolf’Lo prepared for their elimination battles, they all gathered in the arena for the show. The bright lights and cheers from the audience amped up the energy and had all the other teams extra hyped. 
The first battle was the “hidden battle”, where both teams went head to head as a whole group. Y/n wasn’t expecting more than what she’d usually seen from both groups, but it’s safe to say she was blown away by Deep n Dap’s performance. The song choice and usage of nunchucks really had her getting hyped up, and her normal, energetic self slowly coming back.
The battle to follow was between Chocol and Locker Zee. The young Jam Republic member was fired up, which meant some interesting comments were bound to leave her mouth before passing through her brain
“Bruh it’s so annoying how they’re suddenly so good… like- they were good before but this is AMAZING…” Her entire team side-eyed her, Kirsten and Latrice worried about the show airing what she just said, fearing she could get canceled; the other half trying not to laugh but internally agreed. When the third battle is about to begin and mini walks out and takes off her over shirt showing off her pink jersey, y/n gets excited and points with a smile, since the two are both pink lovers, of course causing her team to smile at her in endearment. When JJ walks out and does the same, y/n starts dying laughing, clapping her hands in amusement along with the rest of her crew. Once the battle starts Mini is the first to dance
“She’s like- actually scary” Y/n jokes around and hides behind Audrey, who laughs and continues to smile just because she’s happy her friend is able to joke around again. The fourth battle was the 5 on 5 and y/n was beginning to get tired of how good both teams were. It felt like things were never going to end, and she was honestly thinking neither team deserved to go home at this point. The fifth battle was another one-on-one with Baby Sleek and Locker Zee, which resulted in another win for Wolf’Lo, bringing the score to 3:2 in favor of Wolf’Lo.
For once, Y/n actually found herself rooting for Deep n Dap, probably because she couldn’t stand Wolf’Lo just as much, or possibly even worse. The sixth battle began, and it was between a duo from each team. Yeni Cho and Haechi came out for the orange team, while JJ and Locker Zee both came out for the green team. Y/n was once again bored by the older team’s presentation, genuinely excited to see what the Deep n Dap duo was about to whip up. 
When their music started and everyone recognized it was Michael Jackson, the energy in the room somehow increased even more. JJ and Locker Zee put on a flawless performance, executing each hit and accent perfectly, making sure to connect with each other and the audience. 
“BRO WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?????” “I DON’T KNOW BUT I NEED MORE OF IT” Audrey and Y/n are literally losing their shit while watching the performance, absolutely obsessed with the duo, hoping to see more of them in the future. As JJ and Locker Zee took the win, it tied up the score once again, bringing them to the final round, which ended up being between the two leaders. This was a battle Y/n was extremely curious about, already not a fan of Halo’s specific style and also aware of Mina Myoung’s incapability to freestyle. But when the music started, she was pleasantly surprised 
“WHAT THE FUCK WHY IS SHE EATING?????” Y/n is so baffled by Mina Myoung’s sudden ability to freestyle efficiently. Y/n stood there, fully back to her normal self (at least for the time being) holding onto her hair with her jaw dropped. To her, the improvement (call it that or desperation) was sickening- it was such a pleasant change that Y/n felt Mina deserved the win just for that alone.
However, the win goes to Halo, giving Wolf’Lo the overall gain of staying in the competition, meaning Deep n Dap was the next team to be eliminated. It’s a bit hard to watch, knowing they truly did try their best. Y/n was doing surprisingly well with not crying- well… until Mina started talking. The leader began her speech and the Jam Republic member was able to avoid tears until Mina brought up how she felt she was able to move on from 1 Million. After that, it was like the floodgates opened up. Don’t ask her why, but Y/n took that shit personally, like a shot straight to the heart. Especially when the Deep n Dap leader mentioned her relationship with Lia Kim, y/n felt her ache for them.
As all teams say their goodbyes to Deep and Dap and said team leaves the studio, filming ends for the day. Everyone is either standing around mingling or heading back to their own hideouts. Jam Republic continues their conversation with Mannequeen when Lusher comes bounding over and wraps her arms around y/n congratulating her, nearly scaring the life out of the small girl. When the younger turns around to see who it is, she once again bursts into tears and clings to her. Lusher feels her heart break even more for her friend yet can’t help but giggle softly at how cute the reaction was. Poor y/n was so scared that Lusher hated her too and it brought her the slightest bit of relief knowing that she didn't
Bada watched from where the rest of team Bebe sat in their designated spot, not even trying to hide her irritation at the situation. She was feeling a mix of annoyance (at both y/n and lusher) and watching the interaction once again sent a wave of guilt rushing through her.
"Ya know you can go congratulate her too…" Tatter spoke up from behind the leader. Bada looked over her shoulder at the blonde and scoffed, but it held no malice- she just sounded exhausted
"And why would I go do that?" the team leader looks over her shoulder with a cold stare and a slight look of disgust at the idea
"well for starters so you can stop getting into arguments with your own teammates-" She did have a point… Bada had been much more irritable since the argument, causing a lot of their practice time to be even more strictly ran
"and two, so you can stop making both her and yourself miserable" Ouch Tatter. Ouch.
“Weren’t you just glaring at her too when we walked in?” Bada rolled her eyes and pouted childishly crossing her arms, causing the other girl to snort and respond
“Yeah, but I talked to her in the hallway… she was in the hospital you know-” Tatter responded as if it were common knowledge or a quick throwaway fact about the girl
“What???” the leader’s eyes widened and she uncrossed her arms leaning forward to make sure she heard the girl correctly
“Yeah… got so worked up and anxious over everything she made herself sick apparently” Tatter shrugged, not having all the proper information. Bada sighed and rolled her eyes
“Seriously? Where‘d you even hear this from?” she pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes, now fully recognizing and admitting to the guilt she’d been suppressing. Tatter hesitated for a second, debating whether or not to mention her small conversation with the girl they were talking about, ultimately deciding not to.
“Lusher” the blonde gave away her source matter-of-factly. Of course, she heard it from Lusher. Bada was beginning to think if she hadn’t made a move on Y/n first, Lusher would’ve easily swooped in and done so. But now that she and Y/n were fighting, did that mean Bada could potentially lose her to the other girl? Lusher was attentive and understanding, closer to Y/n’s age, and had been the first of team Bebe to interact with Y/n… plus she had been in contact with her after the whole incident. The leader tried not to worry about the irrational possibility of her own teammate stealing the girl she was pining after away from her… but it was still a lingering thought nonetheless.
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notes: i needed this chapter to be as long as it was just so you guys didn't have to suffer as much in the next chapter🫶
taglist (open) (continued in replies): @tinybada @angel-hyuckie @violetinferno @jesuschrist2006 @1luvkarina @uwulyn @justandloyal2961 @deadgirlwalking3 @squidvoldyvoid @vivzyo @ouhaika @jksjx @ocyeanicc @marianamartinsthings @jxrdxnh @luvjanexx @lorenztired @khjssss @heavenlycloud @loisje123 @starchasermyloves @zhivaxo @grinnwolph @notyourd0lly @stinkbvgs @nermandiiiii-blog @arujee @idontknownemore @thatgayinsomniac @fruitr0llup @cgriffin9797-blog @woooooya @kaaylvst @ssc7514 @astoreea @linda-botello @kpopgirl-97 @erikook @misszoldyc @sammisregrets @jysai @moonsvrse @froufrousnowman @amararosesblog @tikitsune @aestrelle19 @laaaasanielzz @randomhoex @tswisal1 @unpretty-reader @charlesswife @stella222
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spiteless-xo · 1 year
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how do they sleep? naked? with boxers and a shirt? with just boxers? 🕵🏾‍♀️
oooo fun question -- how do you guys always come up with all this stuff!!
(also idk how i started writing for armin....... he's just been wormin his way in here w jean and eren idk)
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╰┈➤ how do they sleep - aot.
ft. armin, eren, jean. cw. gn!reader, implied sexual content
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⋙ armin alert.
armin definitely wears full pyjamas to bed 💀 like matching top and bottom, full long-sleeve, collared, button up (fleece in the winter, silk in the summer)
he wears a new pair every night which is suuuuuper annoying when you guys go on vacation because he insists that he has to. i feel like he used to get night sweats really bad when he was growing up, so it's just a habit from that.
if you wake him up for some 👀 late-night activities 👀 he thinks it's really hot when you unbutton his pyjama shirt while the two of you are making out. or when you touch him through the fabric of his pants -- it makes him so needy and desperate to take them off
BUT he totally puts them back on after sex before you two fall asleep because otherwise, he feels too cold to sleep
cuddles with you for like 30 seconds but then gets too hot and has to roll away to the other side of the bed
⋙ eren jaeger.
eren wears pyjama pants to bed -- you know the ones. those flannel plaid pyjama pants that boys always wear. he's got a few different colours that've been gifted to him over time.
sometimes if it's chilly, he'll wear a wifebeater on top, but otherwise he's shirtless. he feels really restricted with something over his chest while he sleeps -- like i feel like he doesn't even like blankets that much
when the two of you have sex at night, he just kicks his pants down at the bottom of the bed 💀 or only pull them down to his thighs, just enough to get his dick out
after sex, he'll either sleep naked or just in his boxers because he gets too hot to put his pants back on
looooooves cuddling and will absolutely smother you in bed. if you try to roll away and he realizes you're gone, he'll grab for you in the middle of the night to pull you close to him
⋙ jean kirsten.
jean sleeps fully naked or just in his underwear -- he claims it's because he gets too hot to sleep in anything else, but really it's because he's a bit of a horndog before bed
weirdly, if he goes to bed naked, he'll bring a pair of underwear to leave by the bed. i feel like he's really weird about walking around fully naked, so the second he steps out of bed, he has to put on underwear
he'll definitely encourage you to sleep naked too, and then cuddle up with you when you come into bed, slowly start kissing and touching you until things get hot
also loves cuddling, but post-sex he prefers to be the little spoon 🥺 he says it's because he'll get horny again if he cuddles you, but it's really because he just likes being held
alternatively, he also likes laying on his back with your head on his chest, but that's not always super comfortable for you
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