#kindly fuck off and go count my posts lazy

[alicepao13]

Um what now

[starboundmanor]

SYSTEM INTRO !! ^^

GREETINGS EVERYONE!! We are Starbound manor!! I decided to make this blog for shits and giggles, for us to post our stupid little thoughts etc. Some info on us is here!

HOST: KAngel/Ame, ME!!

Hello!! I am KAngel/Ame, the host! I go by he/they pronouns + some neos!! (Fluffy/Meow/Null/Internet) but you are not forced to use those! It would make me happy though ! <3 Our other alters can make more detailed intros on themselves if they wish. too lazy :p

normal system info:

Alter count: 12 atm!

We're all comfy with Masc pronouns like He/him, and are all collectively ok with the name Silas! We are also a transboy. Traumagenic + Fictive heavy, bodily a !!MINOR!! 18+ blogs or 18+ dont interact please! (MY TAG: #INTERNET ANGEL'S DESCENT)

members list below (LONG KINDA):

Airy (Fictive, He/him/alien/space. #Airytypessomething )

Altair (Protector, Brainmade. He/him)

Cyn (Fictive, She/They/It/Null/Virus. TAG: #CYNPOST^_^)

Goodpuffer (Fictive, He/They)

Lamb (Fictive, He/They)

Puter (Brainmade, Ze/Zir/It/Its/Cursed/Internet/Web/Null)

Uzi Doorman (Fictive, Xe/She/They/Crow/Bat. Tag: #BATBITEZ.)

Victim (Fictive, Caretaker (?) Protector #2 He/They/Web)

Aster (?????? Little is known, they just appeared for a bit in co-con and dipped. might be updated, who the fuck is this guy)

Bill Cipher (<- little shit/j -K. Fictive, He/It/Them/Null/Chaos. TAG: #BILLS CHAOS TAG)

N (He/They/Biscuit)

V (She/They/It. TAG: #DISASSEMBLYCATX3)

+ one little we will not add since they arent allowed to go online in places that arent youtube to watch animal videos etc.

DNI/BOUNDARIES:

basic dni, over 18. Fakeclaimers (we are not letting random strangers on the internet tell us if we have a disorder or not. kindly fuck off) Also please dont drag us into drama + please dont compare us/me to our sources. We are not our sources!! (all we can think of atm might update)

We will also sign off on our posts.

Bye!!! <33

(WE ALSO ANSWER ASKS AND STUFF PLEASE ASK US THINGS OK BYE)

-Yours truly, KAngel/Ame ! <3

[littlelioncub43]

Wake Up Call

Summary: Mornings were absolutely divine, especially in the company of one sweetheart of a metalhead— Eddie Munson. Even if he wasnt much of a morning person. You show him just how good a morning can be when you're together.

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Female!Reader

Warnings: Smut (18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI), fluff, blowjobs, oral sex (m receiving), morning sex, reader loves giving Eddie head, Eddie being a screamer, Eddie's morning voice, established relationship, face fucking, deep throating, crying during sex (not the reader), Eddie being a sweetheart, and a partidge in a pear tree.

Word count: I have no clue, babes, I wrote this on my phone 🥰

A/N: Holy shit. I am so self-conscious about this fic, you guys! I haven't posted a full length one-shot in so unbelievably long. I feel rusty. But! I'm posting it anyways! I still feel really good about this one. Anyway. Let me know what you think! Reblog, comment, send an ask, a carrier pigeon, a fax, a telegram, a kindly worded email— I would really love the feedback 🥰 it's nice to be back to writing, and I hope you love it as much as I do. Ok, I'll let you go now. I love you 💖

Kisses 💋

—K

The morning was still, a simple, peaceful hush hanging over the town of Hawkins, Indiana. Birds whistled their songs in a gentle voice, the trees barely rustling in the breeze as the world dreamt a little while longer. With the sun peeking over the horizon and Wayne already en route to work, the little trailer was serenity embodied.

You'd been up for a while doing nothing in particular as you waited for dawn to break. You loved watching the sun rise from Eddie's bed, the sunlight always seemed to pure shining through his curtains. With the new light slowly filling the room, you were finally able to properly see your boyfriend. Eddie lies beside you on his back, hands tossed across his chest haphazardly, his hair tossled carelessly around his face in a halo of chocolate curls and locks. The blanket that covers you both hung low on his hips, showing off the tattoos scattered across his alabaster skin, he ran a little hot at night and the summer heat was enough for him to toss the blankets aside. Your eyes trace the lovebites you left all along his exposed throat and the scratches along his meaty shoulder, a pleasant result of last night's vigorous activities.

The familiar surge of desire floods your body at the memory of last night, it sends a shiver up your bare spine. You bring one hand to his warm chest, drawing lazy lines as you scoot closer and closer to him. A smile tugs at your lips when Eddie twitches slightly, goosebumps pricking his skin like yours. Your hand glides lower and lower, you weren't in a hurry, no. There was more than enough time in the world for you two, right now.

As your fingers brush along the light dusting of hair on his tummy, Eddie can't help but shiver. Even in his sleep, Eddie was always so responsive; aching for your touch, your kisses, your love. He rolled his head to the side, breathing peacefully as he sleeps still. You watch his face for any signs of consciousness, when you find none, you chuckle softly. Your hand teases the edge of the blanket the covers his lower half. A prominent tent rests between his legs, the sight of it has you moaning softly. Your mouth watered with a hunger you knew well, you needed to taste him.

"G'morning, Princess," a raspy voice slurs. You heard the smile in his words well before you saw it. His face was soft from his slumber, eyes puffy but warm with love, his annoyingly charming smile lazily strung across his pink lips.

"Good morning," you whisper, bringing your hand back up to cup his cheek, leaning in so your lips brush against his ever so slightly. Eddie wastes no time closing the distance between you two. Eddie hums happily into the kiss when he feels your body melting into his, your legs tangling with his, his nornally bright voice was always unbearably deep and husky in the morning. The movement of his lips on yours distracts you enough from his arms slowly capturing your waist, holding you to him. He needed his morning kiss to function.

Finally, when breathing became a priority, Eddie relaxed his head back down on the pillow with a satisfied grin. Two rough hands slid across the bareness of your back soothingly as he looked up at you, he noticed the gleam in your eyes, even in the low light of early morning. The realization of your desire made his grin grow twice as big, his cock twitching excitedly with his heart.

"Whatcha lookin' at me like that for, pretty girl?" He teases, he knows exactly what you want. He just loves hearing you say it. You bite your plump lip to suppress a smirk, your hand leaving his cheek to float down his throat and chest.

"I wanna taste you, Eddie," you purr to him, not missing the way his pupils dilate at your confession, a shiver racking his body as your fingers tease the skin at the edge of the blanket once more. Your lips descend to his collarbones, sucking at the pale skin in the way you know drives him wild. "Please?"

"F-Fuck, yes. You can taste me, Princess," he whispers as if the air was knocked from his lungs. The devious pleased giggle you make against the curve of his neck is absolutely sinful, but Eddie can't help but grin wickedly with you. He feels your kisses deepen as you dip lower and lower, your hand finally cupping his morning wood gently— you always were a little tease.

The deep groan that rumbles in Eddie's chest when your warm fist surrounds his base echoes in the brightening room. Streaks of sunshine finally cutting through the blinds to illuminate your actions perfectly. Eddie lifts his head to watch your hand stroke him beneath the blanket, the duvet shrouding your movements, making it that much more erotic.

"Oh fucking hell, that's good," he groans, his hips pushing into your hand eagerly.

"Yeah?" You taunt softly, speeding your hand up ever so slightly. A surprised yelp breaks his deep moans when your teeth nip at the black widow spider inked into his chest, you give the demon head just below it a tender kiss with a pleased giggle before dropping lower and lower. The wet kisses you leave along his body has Eddie fisting the pillow beneath his head.

He fucking loved when you sucked him off, especially since you fucking loved doing it. The way you'd drop to your knees and take him into your mouth so happily, so eagerly— Eddie was wrapped around your little finger from now until the end of time.

"Jesus Christ," he sighs when you toss the blanket down and settle between his legs. You drag your free hand down his side, still steadily jerking him off with the other. You hum at the sight of his hard, throbbing dick, your hand slowing down to appreciate the way his shaft pulses. Your mouth waters to taste the beads of salty precum that ooze from him, but instead you latch on to his twitching thigh, biting the flesh there as you continue to teasingly stroke him.

"Mmmm," you moan, your eyes fluttering shut for a moment as you taste his skin, the heady scent of his manhood filling your senses. The strong yet lean muscle of Eddie's thigh tenses as you inch higher and higher. As much as he wants to believe you'll finally take him into your mouth, he knows better. His guess is proved right when you switched to his neglected thigh, opting to decorate it with hickeys and bites as you did the first one.

"Fuck— Princess, please, have mercy," he groans with a smile, his hands gripping the pillow a little harder. You chuckle and answer him with a kiss to the most recent hickey you were working on. Eddie watches as you finally bring your tongue to his head, he watches the pink muscles greedily clear away the drops of precum.

"O-Oh, fuck, yes," he moans as your lips encase his tip, his eyes fluttering. Yours stay on his face, enjoying the way his eyebrows furrow and crease with pleasure. With a slack jaw, Eddie lets out the pretties sounds you've ever heard; deep, throaty moans that bubbled from the pit of his chest and echoed throughout the unclean bedroom. His words slur together as you take more of his length into you, finding a slow and steady pace to bob your head.

This happened every single time, he couldn't believe how fucking good your mouth felt. How hot, how soft, how fucking wet you were. You moan as he fills your mouth, your hand not holding his base strokes his hip and inner thigh, knowing how sensitive he was there. The shivers you get in return tell you that he loves it. The vibrations of your moan has Eddie's hips twitching, stuffing more of himself into your throat.

"F-Fuck! Fucking hell!" He curses through his teeth, his eyes shut tight as he tries to calm down.

"Mmmmm," you moan again, watching as his face contorts once more.

"Jesus!" He shouts a little louder than intended, his eyes opening only to roll as you speed up ever so slightly. The sloppy sounds of his cock slowly fucking your mouth was going to drive him crazy. "Baby, ple— a-ah!— faster! Faster, God, please, faster!"

The rawness of his voice and his begging was more than enough to convince you. With a deep breath through your nose, you speed up. Your tongue flat against the underside of his shaft to guard him from your bottom teeth, and your hand moving from his base to cup his balls. The moment your soft hand comes into contact with his aching balls, Eddie does all he can do to keep from screaming; his balled up fist shoved into his mouth.

"Ohhhhmygod!" He cries from behind his hand as you play with his balls, his body writhes uncontrollably at the onslaught of indescribable pleasure. One, two, three more bobs of your head and you've swallowed him completely, your nose brushing against the patch of dark curls at his groin and his tip nestled deep in the heat of your throat. Unable to fight it anymore, Eddie's hand leaves the pillow to grip the back on your head fiercely, an unintelligible scream pitifully muffled by his fist.

The sounds erupting from your lover above you has arousal practically spilling from your untouched cunt. Your thighs rub together with need as Eddie's thighs tremble and spread for you. The grip he has on your head limits your movements, unable to pull off more than an inch or two, at best. In quick, jerking motions, he fucks your face eagerly as he listens to you gag around him. Your eyes, clouded with tears, flutter shut, allowing yourself to lose yourself in his pleasure.

Soon, you both find a rhythm. It's fast and dirty, primal, frenzied, lustful. Perfect. Eddie's deep moans raise in pitch, now sounding like a pitiful whimpering mess. Your own moans grow in frequency, knowing he's close to blowing his load down your throat, just like you want. The twitching of his cock signals his impending high.

"Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck—!" Water gathers at his lower lashes. He couldn't help himself.

Eddie's head slowly begins to lift off the bed, his abs contracting as the pleasure mounts higher and higher, his voice suddenly gone. His hand leaves his mouth to join the other on your head, his fingers going rigid, his eyes stare up at the ceiling in an unfocused gaze, chin tilted towards the heavens as his pretty brown orbs roll and flutter uncontrollably. The smart mouth that is quick with a joke or a witty comment is left hung open in a silent scream, he holds his breath, his entire body drawing painfully taught when the pleasure is suddenly too much for him to take.

The first rope of his hot seed shoots into your throat as Eddie goes still, tears spilling over. He swears on everything holy that he's ascended to heaven, his vision is white and blinded with bursts of light as you milk him dry. You pet his hip as he cums, swallowing his seed with eager gulps, his lungs burning with the lack of oxygen. Each time your throat contracts around his length, his muscles pull tighter.

Finally, the last bit of his cum is cast out from his body. The strength quickly drains from Eddie, his grip loosens from your hair as he falls back on to the mattress, his eyes drooping shut on their own accord. You release him with a pop, gasping to catch your own breath. Through the water in your eyes, you see Eddie's relaxed face, his body limp above you.

"Eddie?" You call softly, your voice gravelly from your throat being wrecked. When you get no response, you crawl up his body, taking note of his breathing and erratic heartbeat. He's out cold.

You can't help but laugh a little before gently petting his sweaty head, brushing his bangs off his sticky forehead. Eddie comes back to you softly tapping his cheek, his ears ring like a bitch but he can hear your melodious voice over the din.

"Eddie, baby, wake up, come on, open your eyes for me, honey," you sound far away, but your words get clearer and clearer. The first thing he sees is your relieved smile, and he just can't help but tiredly smile back. "Hi, there, handsome. You ok?"

"Huh-huh," he grumbles from deep in his chest, speaking was far too complicated for him right now. You had well and truly sucked him stupid. Sleepily, he nuzzles into your hand that now cradles his cheek.

"Ready for a nap, big boy?" You coo and pull the blanket over you both. He hums an affirmative and weakly slings an arm around your waist, holding you close to him. On instinct, you bury your face into his neck as you settle in beside him.

A nap couldn't hurt.

Comments and reblogs are always appreciated!

I no longer have a taglist! If you wish to stay up-to-date on when I post, follow @littlelioncub-library 💖🫂🥰

Dividers by the amazing @firefly-graphics

[meltwonu]

| 🎃 𝕸𝖔𝖓𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖍 🎃 |

↪ ✦ casanova ✦

this chapter pairing; incubus!vernon x succubus!reader

genre&warnings; incubus!au, cocky!vernon, lots of banter, breathplay/choking, slight fingering, blowjob, dirty talk, degradation, namecalling, fucking in a public place 😗

notes; oh the way cocky vernon hits so different 🤤🥵 low-key I was imagining bad clue vernon for this one but then I was like mmm thats a little too dapper for this fic so instead my mind was like 🤤🤤🤤 fear era vernon~ Anyway~ oh! I'll make a notice probably tomorrow that I won’t be online this weekend(thurs-sun) at all, but I'll log in to post the last 3 monster mash fics! I’ll also be answering all the thirst posts/comments/etc. throughout the week once I get back! 💕 have a good day/night! all my socal bbys, stay safe! see u tomorrow! 💕🎃👻 

word count; ~2600

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - x - x - x - x

i’m here lying on the bed of your tongue;

my heart listens to the sound of your war drum

steady tiptoeing to your neck of the woods;

i feel danger on your lips but it tastes good.

You take a seat at the bar, legs crossed and a bored expression on your face.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you look this awful.” The bartender comments, sliding a drink across the countertop. “It’s, uh, on the house.”

“Thanks, Seungcheol.” You mutter, graciously accepting the free drink.

Tonight should’ve been an easy night for you; just a quick visit to a few of your regular humans and you would’ve been easily sated. But for whatever reason, not a single of them provided you with any sort of satisfaction and you’d left out of boredom before they’d even gotten you to cum.

“You okay? You look... Like you’ve seen better days.” He laughs, leaning over the counter top. “It’s Halloween, you out of all people should be busy.” You quickly down the drink in one shot, passing Seungcheol the glass as he goes to fill it up again, back turned to you. “See, you’d think that. But it fuckin’ sucked. Dunno, nothing really satisfied my craving, I guess.”

“And what are you craving, princess?”

A voice from behind you has you spinning on your barstool as you come face to face with Vernon. “Ugh, it’s you.” He laughs lightly, taking a seat next to you as he shrugs his suit jacket off.

“Fuck you mean, ‘ugh’?” Vernon scoffs.

Seungcheol comes back with your drink and one for Vernon as well, sliding them to your side as he sighs. “Okay, why are you both here? Seriously, it’s Halloween! Feeding should be easy!” You roll your eyes, glass in hand as you stare Seungcheol down. “And what are you doing here, Seungcheol? Shouldn’t you be feeding?”

The male raises a brow at you, “What do you think I’m doing on my breaks? This place is crawling with humans trying to get caught up in the mix.”

Vernon sighs next to you, quietly taking a sip of his drink. “And you? Why are you here, Vernon?”

He places his glass down, half turned to face you. “I could ask you the same thing.”

Seungcheol chuckles, hip propped up against the countertop as he butts in. “She said nobody is ‘satisfying’ her tonight.” Vernon’s expression falls into that of understanding as you groan.

“Ugh, ‘Cheol, go mind your business!” The said male backs off laughing, walking towards the other side of the bar to service other patrons.

“Nobody’s satisfying you, huh? And why’s that? All your regulars getting boring?” Vernon asks; a lazy smirk on his features.

“I could ask you the same fuckin’ thing, Vernon. Or is it that you can’t get it up maybe?” You tease.

The smirk falls from his face, eyes squinting at you. “Is that what you think? That I can’t get it up? And how about you? Is that pussy of yours scaring off all of your regulars? Or maybe their dicks are too small and can’t satisfy how fuckin’ much you want your cunt filled.”

You lean in at the same time he does, fingers looping into his necktie as you pull him in even closer.

“You talk like you can satisfy me.” “Are you tryna find out? ‘Cause I’m willing to let you. But don’t go crying when my cock’s too big for you.” Vernon grins.

“Prove it then, casanova. Show me you’re worth my time.”

Vernon pushes you into the employee restroom, Seungcheol shouting in the background as the door locks into place.

The red lights in the small space make it feel more intimate and sensual; the complete opposite of the way Vernon’s teeth clash with yours when he kisses you hard.

You moan into the kiss, hands tangling into his hair as he presses you into the door and he slots a leg between your own, letting you grind down onto his thigh as he smirks against your lips. It’s a battle for power between the two of you; neither of you willing to give up your natural dominant nature.

Vernon pulls away, eyes hazy and the same cocky smirk on his lips. “So fuckin’ desperate to get fucked, you’ll use my thigh too, huh?”

“Maybe that’s your only charm point?” You retort. He doesn’t take too kindly as he shakes your hands out of his hair and he drags you over to the countertop.

In the mirror, you take in your appearance, your own drunk eyes staring right back at you. “God, you talk so damn much, you know that?” He murmurs, nosing at your neck. His hands roam your body, hiking your dress further and further up until he can run his fingertips over your panties. He wastes no time, locating your clit through the material before he pinches it hard.

“O-oh, fuck!” You cry, eyes clamping shut at his rough touch. Your panties get wetter and wetter and you find yourself grinding your ass into his hardening cock.

Vernon kisses your skin, leaving small love bites in his wake as he continues to tease you through your panties. “Mmm, you’re getting so wet and all I’m doing is touching your ‘lil clit through your panties. Is that how easy you are? Just a little taste and you’re already putty in my hands.” He smirks against you, fingertips pulling your panties to the side.

“You say I talk too much? You fuckin’ talk too much, Vernon. Hurry up and finger me already!”

He laughs, running his fingers through your wetness before he sinks his index and middle fingers up to the knuckle in one fast movement.

A garbled moans floats past your lips as he starts fucking you with his fingers and you watch your own expression contort in pleasure at the way his fingers were already providing you with more satisfaction than anything else tonight. “Oh, g-god, fuck, that feels suh---so good…”

Vernon ruts into your ass, smoky eyes gazing into the mirror. “You’re so pretty getting drunk on my fingers fucking you open. How are you gonna look once it’s my cock inside of you?”

“G-god, we won’t g-get, ah, there if you don’t s-shut up!” He rolls his eyes, nipping at the junction of your neck.

Vernon lets you grind against his fingers for a moment, eating up the way you seem to forget about everything around you as you chase the pleasure. But he  gets bored, pulling his fingers out of you almost just as quickly as he’d first sunk them in.

“H-hey!”

“Oh, baby, you can’t be the only one benefitting from this.” Vernon pulls away from you, uncaring that he uses his sticky, wet fingers to undo the button and zipper of his pants. “Hope you’re ready to take my cock. All those people that couldn’t fuck you right tonight were all just pregames ‘til now, huh?” He grins, wrapping a hand around his cock.

You can only see so much from the mirror’s reflection; watching as Vernon places a firm hand on your shoulder as he pushes your upper half further down onto the countertop. “Get comfy, princess. Wouldn’t want you to break a nail or something.”

“Just fuck me already, damn it!” Whining, you place your hands palm down on the mirror as you jut your ass out further. You watch with hazy eyes as he smirks at you in the mirror and you soon feel the head of his cock teasing your entrance.

“God, you are so lucky I’m just as impatient as you are.”

You’re about to complain about him taking too long again, but you’re quickly left breathless when he starts inching his cock into your wet pussy. “Fuh---fuck, oh, go---god you’re, ah, b-big!”

“Get used to it, you’ll be begging me for more.”

You choose to ignore his cocky comments as you focus on the way his cock stretches you out perfectly, eyes rolling to the back of your head when he finally bottoms out. His cock taps against your cervix and you resist the urge to just start fucking yourself on his cock, impatience muddling everything else in your mind.

“Mmm, your pussy is so tight and warm around me, baby. Maybe it’s that personality of yours that scares off your regulars.” Vernon chuckles under his breath, but it’s immediately cut short when you clench around him hard. “Shit, fine, fine, I get it!” He grumbles.

Vernon draws his hips back before slamming his cock back into you and for a second, your clammy palms pressed up against the mirror almost lose their grip with how your body jerks forward. “God, yes, yes fuck me hard!” You cry, already meeting his harsh pace.

“So this is why they can’t do it for you, huh?” His hips snap into you; the sound of skin slapping getting drowned out by the loud music on the other side of the door. “You wanna be fucked like a little cumslut tonight and nobody wants to give it to you.”

“Ngh, y-yeah… s-so what’s y-your fuckin’, ah, d-deal?”

Vernon scoffs, “Maybe I just wanted to treat someone like my own ‘lil cockslut tonight and nobody was doin’ it for me either.” You grin in return, hazy eyes focused on yourself in the mirror.

“Guess t-this was where, ah, we were meant to be t-tonight.” You lick your lips, working your hips back as you start to chase your orgasm. “By the w-way, don’t--don’t cum, hah, inside m-me…” He slows his pace a little, leaning over your back as he nuzzles into your shoulder. “Oh? Why’s that? Don’t want people to know I fucked you in Seungcheol’s employee restroom? Or is it that you’re scared you’ll get addicted to me cumming inside your hot little cunt. Maybe you’ll even go home and fuck my cum deeper inside of yourself wishin’ it was still me and not your hands or your dumb little humans.”

His words are almost filthy enough to make you change your mind, but you harden your stare, crimson eyes meeting his in the mirror’s reflection. “Don’t g-get too cocky, Vernon. Just don’t fuckin’ cum i-in me. I’m s-still going out, mmh, after t-this…”

He shoots you an incredulous look, leaning away from you shoulder as he starts to double his pace. “Wow, fuckin’ bold of you to even go out after this. But okay, you’ll come crawling back to find me and I’ll be waiting at the bar for you. Maybe you’ll even be so fuckin’ desperate for my cock, I’ll even make you beg me. And beg for me to cum inside of you.” Vernon pauses, snaking his hand up your spine before he circles it around the column of your throat. “For now, you’re gonna cum on my cock, get it nice ‘n soaked. Then you’re gonna suck me off and I’m gonna cum down that pretty throat of yours.”

“F-fine…”

Vernon gently applies pressure to your throat, restricting your airways slightly as you start to get tighter around him. “Touch your clit, make yourself cum.” He commands.

You’re quick to take his lead, trailing a hand down your body until you can rub quick circles on your clit. “G-god, yes, fuck, ah, I’m gon---gonna cum, fuck! My pussy’s so fuckin’ full, I---mmph!” Vernon’s hand on your throat quickly travels up until his palm is pressed firmly against your lips, effectively muffling you.

He uses this as leverage, pushing you backwards until your back meets his clothed chest. Your body jerks in his hold as he fucks into you hard, cock slamming into your cervix with each thrust. “Fuck, you have such a filthy fuckin’ mouth. Everyone can probably hear what a little whore you are. But I bet that gets you off, doesn’t it? Letting everyone know how fuckin’ good you’re getting it.” He licks the shell of your ear, hips pistoning into you as you cum; moans and cries muffled by Vernon’s hand still over your mouth.

“That’s right, cum on my cock, baby. Your tight cunt feels so good around me.” Moaning, he slows down his thrusts, watching you through the mirror as you take your pleasure.

It doesn’t give you any energy like feeding from a human would, but the pleasure still feels good enough for shapes dance beneath your eyelids as he fucks you through your orgasm.

“Shit, you really are pretty like this.” Vernon scoffs under his breath as he finally removes his hand from over your mouth. Your body slumps forward as you catch your breath; soft whimpers on your lips. “Now it’s my turn, baby. I expect you on your knees now~”

You groan in return, somewhat drained. This is why you never fucked with other incubus; there was no energy gain and it left you more tired than anything else.

But you only think it’s fair, so you drop to your knees, wincing slightly when the tile bites into your kneecaps. You open your mouth and stick your tongue out, ready for Vernon to hurry up and cum down your throat.

“Hmm~ I think you’d be even prettier with my cum all over your face. Whaddya think?” He grins, eyes twinkling down at you.

“Do you ever wonder what it’d be like to have your dick bitten off?” You growl.

Vernon takes the hint as he threads a hand loosely into your hair and you use a hand to wrap around his cock that’s already covered in your wetness.

You immediately sink your mouth down onto his cock; deepthroating him and hollowing out your cheeks around him. Tucking your hands underneath your thighs, you let Vernon use your mouth, moaning around him to help throw him over the edge.

He groans from above you, hips thrusting into your mouth as he feels his orgasm coming on, only a few minutes later. “Fuck, ‘m gonna, ah, c-cum. Swallow it all, baby. Show me what a good cumslut, hah, you a-are.”

Humming around him, you bask in the way his moans are clipped and stuttered with your teasing.

Vernon could be so easy too, despite his cocky nature.

You feel his cock throbbing in your mouth, the salty substance hitting the back of your throat as you aim to swallow it all down.

“Ngh, look at you. Not even a drop spilled. You’re a pro~” He quips; tugging you by the hair as you cough and sputter. A thread of cum and spit connect your lips to his cock and for a second, Vernon thinks he can get used to seeing you like this.

You move to stand, legs shaky as you rest your back against the countertop that he’d had you bent over, moments prior. “At least one of us is.” You smirk at him, wiping your lips with the back of your hand.

“God, you really just don’t quit, do you?”

“Hey, some of my humans like it, asshole.” You turn to face the mirror, taking in your disheveled appearance.

Vernon stands beside you, adjusting his clothes and hair as you do too. “Speaking of, are you really still heading out after this?”

Tugging your dress down, you check your appearance in the mirror one last time before you reach for the doorknob and unlock it.

“Yeah, ‘cause that drained me of any energy I had.” You pause, turning slightly to face Vernon who stands behind you. You bite the inside of your cheek and despite the snarky banter between the two of you; Vernon wasn’t half bad. 

“Maybe once I get some of it back, I’ll meet you at the bar.”

His eyes flash a darker shade of red, lips ghosting across the shell of your ear when he leans in.

“I’ll be waiting on you, baby.”

[adorehs]

wipeout

Hi the beginning of this story was stuck in my brain for a while… so here it is lol. Got lazy at the end and this really isn’t all that good to begin with.

Summary: Surfer!Harry meets Lifeguard!Y/N after a tragic fall. (6.4k words)

Warnings: unprotected smut, kinda cringey as fuck at the end

Harry was trying to decide how harsh the waves would be by looking at the sky. It was a difficult task but proved to be more accurate then looking at the ocean, so he opted to stare at the sky like a lunatic for a few minutes before each surf.

“What's the consensus?” Louis asks, slapping two hands on Harry’s shoulders.

Harry shot his coach, Louis, a pointed glare, “Probably a bit heavier than usual but it’ll be doable.”

Louis, only a two years senior of twenty four year old Harry, had a spine fracture, resulting in the stiffness of his lower back. It wasn’t an uncommon injury, but it was a bad one. He found himself unable to surf for almost a year so he began coaching other athletes in the meantime. Meeting Harry at twenty two was one of the best things he could’ve done for himself.

Harry was a natural athlete, meaning he learned quickly and took direction well. He was self taught and was unable to do more than a few basic skills when Louis met him. Originally, Louis wanted nothing to do with Harry but he heard some scouts were onto him so he introduced himself and taught the twenty year old how to do a floater- riding the breaking lip of a wave.

He was impressed with the speed Harry picked up the skill so he returned the following day and taught him another skill and cleaned up some of his older ones. They both returned again and again for weeks until one day Louis asked him if he was looking for a sponsor. Harry agreed, and not only did Louis' life turn around as a coach but his companies profits broke records in the industry.

And Harry’s life changed for the better too. His body changed rapidly as he learned more and he was soon able to do almost all skills thrown in a pro competition, though some were sloppy. Louis began enrolling him in surf competitions so he could get some experience and visuals of the skillset of other surfers. In a matter of a year, Harry was surfing in the men’s qualifier for the championship tour to come the following year. At twenty four Harry’s name was racing to the top of the men’s surfing leader board.

Harry stood next to the bed of Louis’ truck, deciding which board he would ride with for the first round. There were three that laid flat, bound together with a cord taught against the rails. Louis always told Harry to pick the one he practices with, but Harry theorizes that each board puts him in a different mood and helps with different aspects of surfing. He would have to do a test run before he decides.

He unwound the cord and pulled out his practice board, making Louis smile in victory. “Don’t get too excited,” Harry mumbles, “Gonna decide later.”

Louis nodded in response and rounded the car to get Harry’s all black wetsuit for the competition. “Bathrooms round the corner,” he pointed at a large tent, “I’ll sign ya in and get your board.”

//

Harry took approximately five minutes in the ocean before paddling back and telling Louis which board he wanted to use (to which Louis rolled his eyes before getting him the white board with black accents). The wind was becoming increasingly heavy and the lifeguards called out everyone who was not in the competition from the area.

Harry squinted as he watched the sun reappear from a sliver between a few clouds, before lining up behind the surfers who stood before him in the queue. There were four competitors before his turn and he was watching as other athletes shook their knees in an effort to stay steady on their board.

“Remember, keep your body forward and don’t take off your leg rope,” Louis scolded him from his right.

Harry had a habit of removing his leg rope before getting up on the board- he says he can’t get a steady stance and he feels restricted. Louis, on the other hand, always butts heads with Harry on that point, claiming taking it off can get him disqualified in some competitions so keeping it on always will help him adapt. Harry never listened until he had to.

It wasn’t that he wasn’t serious, but rather too carefree. He wasn’t one to watch for form and technique unless he had to. He enjoyed the addictive serotonin he seemed to gain from surfing more than anything else.

The queue moved steadily forward and Harry found himself gripping onto his board and digging his toes into the sand as he felt the cool air nip at his exposed feet, “Double pump around, stay tight,” he mumbles his maneuvers to himself. It was only a matter of minutes before it would be his turn to find a wave. The forty-eight seconds allotted to each surfer seemed so short until they were in the ocean.

Harry gets waved in by a judge and he nods kindly before jogging towards the ocean. His hair was beginning to whip around his neck so once he got a bit further in, he sat on his board and tied it up into a bun before continuing forward in search of a wave.

//

You watched as Harry Styles was announced from your spot on the jet ski you were stationed at. You were listening to the live radio broadcast of his turn from your post, the jet ski shaking smoothly and jumping over small waves as the surfers got weaker and weaker from the unpredictable weather.

“Styles starts the final pulling into the pin nice and easy… a clean entrance,” you listen as the wave covers Harry’s body entirely before he reappears on the other side, falling onto the backside of the wave in celebration. You hum in acceptance of the man as he climbs back onto his board, fiddling with his foot rope.

He pauses as he sees another wave approaching and he paddles to the top so he can drop in. “Setting it up clean from the back, Styles is going in with a calm top turn wrap,” you watch as Harry gracefully maneuvers his body along the back of the wave, turning up the back and onto the side, hardly backtracking towards the rush of water.

“Right there! A lay back dagger under the lip. Very smooth, nice and high up on the wave… look at that wave crash too! Good momentum,” the announcer rambles about Harry’s next turn. You cheer silently at his success as his head bops out from under the wave.

“Deep off the bottom, crushing the finish! Another big hack he lets go of!” You watch Harry’s body twist, slightly uncomfortable, through the harsh wave. The water higher than you’ve seen it before, nearly covering your view from the lighthouse on the other side of the beach.

Harry groans at the sight of another good wave- hardly having recovered from the last. His knees were weak and his back was growing stiff at the unearthly winds that whipped harsh water onto his wetsuit like a slap on the back.

He drops in, “Big whip on the oncoming section, holds the rail into a huge top turn wrap and he’s pulling back into the pin,” and Harry’s hand comes in contact with the water once again, making him pull his hand back harshly.

He panics at the feeling and shakes his hand vigorously, slowing down the direction of his surfing. He steps backwards slightly, shaking wildly at the wind hitting his unstable board. Within moments, the board flies out from beneath his feet and hits him square on the head.

Harry’s body falls flat onto the water as his leg lets off the loosened rope and his board comes up without him.

“Styles seems to have taken a trip under for a moment,” the announcer continues, “He has one wave left until competitor Horan makes start.”

Your eyes watch with shock as you wait for Harry to rise from the water- to see his mop of hair or the electric blue of his wet suit. Thirty, thirty one, thirty two, you counted in a rhythm. At forty, you were required to begin your ride towards the athlete.

“Y/N,” you hear on the radio channel, “Head out!”

That was all the invitation you needed as you stood up slightly, grasping onto a ring buoy with an extended cord and tying it to the base of your jet ski. You remained standing as you raced towards the waves, the wind almost knocking you over multiple times as you looked through the water for any indication of Harry.

Your heart drops as you hear the radio go silent with a short static ring and the ocean water grows darker as the sun falls behind a group of clouds. A clap of thunder startles you as you see other lifeguards arriving to take the other surfers back to shore.

You swam in large circles around the area for what felt like a few minutes, but in reality only lasted another thirty seconds.

Out of the blue, you see a small wave crash over Harry’s board and his head makes a light appearance.

Fighting to get his side as quickly as possible, you drag him up onto the buoy you held and tied it to the back of your jet ski. He lays flat on the floating donut, face up, as you wave your arms wildly to indicate you need help.

//

Harry was lying limp against your back as you rode back steadily, the weight of his buff body heavy on yours as you tried to keep the two of you steady without dropping him or falling over.

Coming to an abrupt stop, three men race towards you, “Jesus Harry,” you hear one curse. You look up and make eye contact with the man who is staring at the boy on your back, “Told you keep you fuckin’ leg rope on,” he continues. You conclude the man must be Harry’s coach.

The two other men help him off of you and you curse as you temporarily beach your jet ski. The men had grabbed Harry by the arms and were dragging him onto the ground to see if he needed CPR. “He has a pulse,” one mentions, “But he doesn’t seem to be breathing properly.”

You curse under your breath, “Move,” you mutter, leaning above Harry. Your hands meet his chest as you do a routine of thirty chest compressions and two rescue breaths, “Call first aid,” you scold.

Your mouth meets Harry’s for a second time and you feel his lips twitch under yours. You gasp and sit up, beginning chest compressions again so you don't get water in your own mouth when he starts breathing again.

Sure enough, Harry lets out a dramatic gasp and begins coughing up a bit of water. You lean back before he can project any of the salty water onto your body and continue doing chest compressions until you can feel him breathing normally again.

“You good?” You ask as his coach brings him a towel, “Fall seemed pretty harsh but your run was good.”

“Thanks,” he glanced at you dismissively. “Lou, do you know if I can get my time back?”

“Probably not,” ‘Lou’ replies, “They already started with Horan so I doubt they’d put you back in for just one run.”

Harry nods sadly at his coach and looks back at you, “Do you know where I can get some warmth?” he asks.

Your mouth opens then closes a bit, “Uh- not exactly?”

“It’s a yes or no question,” he counters.

“Yes,” you pause, “But I don’t know if I can take you there.”

He glares at you, “Well can you find out,” his teeth are chattering from the cold air and strong winds blowing his hair entirely to one side.

“Uh.. yeah,” you reply, “I’ll be back.” You walk out of earshot from Harry and his coach and find your dad, the head of the competition.

“Hey- uh Dad?” you ask, tapping on his shoulder. He is speaking to a group of coordinators for the event, moving his hands animatedly.

He turned with a large smile, “Hey honey,” he eyes your wet body, “Everyone good?”

You nod, “Yeah I- uh,” you hesitate, “I wanted to know if I could bring Harry to the lighthouse?”

“Harry Styles?” he asks with a grin, “He’s a great kid, how’s he doin’?”

“He’s alright now, he wanted to get some warmth. I just pulled him from the water.”

Your dad’s eyes widen, “Yeah.. take the bike and be safe.”

You nod a quick thanks before throwing an “I love you,” over your shoulder and finding your duffel bag with the keys and a spare change of clothes.

You present yourself in front of Harry once again, holding onto your duffel and spinning your motorbike keys around your finger, “Come on, gotta get there quick, hm?”

He looks at his coach and nods back at you, “Okay, let’s go.” He stands up and follows you as you lead the way to your motorbike.

“Sorry, I don’t exactly have a warm car,” you say, straddling the bike and kicking the stand up, steadying it with your legs. “Hop on, though, we’ll be there in a few minutes,” you tap the seat behind you, turning forward and holding your helmet back so Harry could use it.

“You should use it,” he comments, pushing your hand slightly back towards your body.

“I know how to be safe, you use it,” you counter, handing the helmet back. He takes a long look at your unwavering stare and sighs as he pushes the helmet onto the mop of curls that are slowly drying off the top of his head.

Once you are sure he is secure, you check around your shoulder before speeding out of the parking lot.

It was mildly uncomfortable- Harry in a skin tight wetsuit and you in an awkwardly fitting one piece. You were both extremely cold and Harry found himself wrapping his arms around you as best as he could to preserve any bit of warmth from both of your bodies as he could.

You sighed in content as you see the lighthouse approaching ahead of you. You slow the motorbike down and park it right before the miniature entrance to the large building, kicking the stand down and locking the bike.

“There are lots of stairs but the place is pretty modern,” you shrug. Between each loop of the spiral staircase there was a different room- a kitchen, a bedroom, a bathroom, a study, and an observatory.

“You can stay down here, I have to turn the heater up,” you begin walking up the stairs before turning to look at him, who’s looking around the kitchen with wide eyes, “Do you want any clothes?”

“Umm,” Harry looks down at his current outfit, “Yes please.”

You nod, going up to the bedroom which was the next floor up. The thermostat dial makes a clicking noise as you increase the temperature in the building, the vents exhausting as air begins flowing. You then changed out of your wet bathing suit into a large sweater and some shorts before finding some of your dad’s clothes of a similar nature before going back down and handing them to Harry.

“They should fit, you can go up and change. I’ll make some food,” you point upstairs without looking at Harry, making your way up to make do with what was remaining in the lighthouse food storage.

You look through what your dad called the freezer- in reality, you thought it was more of a poor excuse of a fridge- and find the stash of frozen meals your family tends to keep there in case of emergencies. “Chicken parm,” you mumble aloud, turning the box over in your hands multiple times in an effort to find and read the expiration date. “Next week… guess I have no choice.”

You turn on the toaster oven that was hidden inside a cabinet and wait for it to heat up. You hear Harry’s heavy footing coming down the wooden paneling of the stairs and you glance at him as he walks over and opens a cupboard.

“Thanks for the clothes,” he mentions, hardly sparing you a glance. “Is there anything edible we can have with that?”

You shrug, “Feel free to look. I have a feeling everything else is just as bad as this.”

He nods, rummaging through the cardboard boxes and plastic containers that were half full from your quick meals. “Ah-ha!” he manages out- head buried deep into the cupboard. “Cocoa powder,” he grins childishly.

You let out a soft chuckle under your breath, “Be my guest,” you gesture towards the stove tops with a set of pants sitting on top of them.

He happily makes his way over, cracking open the box in the process. “Need to boil some water,” he mentions, looking at you.

You find a bottle on the table that hadn’t been opened and hand it to him. He pours the water into the pan and allows it to sit and boil as he watches you carefully reach your hand into the oven and check if the chicken parmesan was at the right temperature.

“Can you even tell like that?” he asks, back leaning against a counter and arms crossed over his chest, making him look even more buff.

“Kind of,” you shrug, glancing over your shoulder, “I bet it’ll need another minute in there before the inside actually warms up,” you conclude, pulling your hand from the oven and closing the door to it.

The water begins to boil in the pan and Harry brings the heat down to a simmer, adding the cocoa, sugar, and a pinch of salt that he found in the same cupboard. He hums in approval as he pours the hot chocolate into two mugs, adding the milk he heated up in another pan into each and mixing them until he is satisfied with the new consistency of the drink.

“Perfect for a rainy day!” he smacks his lips obnoxiously after taking a sip.

“This is definitely the weirdest food combo I’ve ever had,” you pull the chicken parmesan out of the oven.

Harry chuckles, using two forks to move the bulk of chicken onto a plate impatiently. “I’ve had worse. Eaten bugs and s’mores.”

“See, but at least that makes sense. I can guess you’ve had that when camping… this just seems odd.”

He shrugs, “I guess,” he takes a bite out of the chicken. “Why is this really good?” his eyes widened.

You let out a hearty laugh, “Because I cooked it fully and made sure it wasn’t expired?” you explain in a ‘duh’ tone.

Harry rolls his eyes, “Where’d all this sass come from? You were so shy twenty minutes ago.”

“You were a lot meaner twenty minutes ago,” you counter. Your eyes dart towards your phone when you hear it begin to vibrate abruptly.

“Hey dad,” you pick up.

“Hey hon, you guys being safe? Don’t think the storm’s gonna let up anytime soon, so if Harry’s gotta be somewhere he’s gotta go now,” your father's voice comes blaring through the speaker of your phone.

You feel blood rushing to your cheeks at the comment, you wanted to seem independent, “Yeah, we’re safe. I’ll ask him. You good? Need any help down there? I beached my ski by the way, not sure if you saw…” you rambled.

“No, just stay there hon. We got your ski docked and we’ll take care of everything. Check with Harry and don’t go out unless you absolutely need to!”

You hum a response of understanding and bid farewell before hanging up. “Do you need to go somewhere? Or are you staying here?”

“Am I allowed to stay?” he counters.

“If you don’t need to leave tonight then sure. There’s room,” you shrug, picking up your now completed dish and placing it in the sink to wash later.

“I’ll stay,” he confirms, getting up and placing his dish in the sink too before soaking them with water to get the grease off easier.

You nod and look out the small window in front of the sink. The wind was making boats rock and you could see a tree branch fly in front of the window, likely meaning the storm was going to turn into a full fledged hurricane.

You hear the water running smoothly as Harry scrubs each dish and sets them out to dry on the counter, “So what happened?” you ask.

“Huh?”

“Like, when you were surfing. How’d ya fall? You don’t seem like the type,” you shrug, turning to face him.

He glances at you before sitting back down at the dining table, “Lots a things… took off my leg rope, fucked up my footing, hit my head with my board… the list goes on.”

You squint at the man before nodding in disbelief, “Okay. What got you into surfing?”

“Thought it looked cool and I had moved to Malibu. Just rented a board and learned how to stand in a few days. Figured someone could show me the basics and then I met my coach Louis and he signed me,” Harry explains dismissively, “Why’re you a lifeguard? And how’d you get in here?”

“My dad owns this building and he’s the coordinator of the surfing events. Says he knows you but I don’t believe him-” you were cut off.

“No way! Your dad is Mr. Y/L/N? He’s so cool,” Harry gushes. “Paid for my first board and got me a waiver for my first competition out here.”

You let out a laugh, “Yeah, I told him to do that.”

Harry’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion and his eyes pleaded to know why you would ask for such a thing for an inexperienced surfer. “I was following Louis before his injury and I knew he wouldn’t put on a bad athlete. Started following you once you got signed,” you continued.

“Did you think I was good?” He asks after absorbing what you had said. You noticed he’s not particularly keen on talking about himself.

“At first I thought you sucked,” you chuckled, sitting down with him at the table, “But the more I watched of you the more drastically you improved. By 2018 I think I was sold completely on you as an athlete. Listened to most of your runs by radio.”

“Only took you two years?” Harry asked, surprised, “Most people are hardly starting with me. Just got my first offer to switch sponsors last week.”

“Always rooting for the underdog a bit, I guess,” you giggle. Though you’ve been sitting with Harry for quite some time now, you are just now realizing the gravity of the situation- you are sitting with an athlete you had admired for years. “I always knew you had potential, though. Went from mediocre to average in just a few months. Impressive,” you smile at him.

“Ah so you were a fan from the start,” Harry teases, “Attracted to my ambition and drive, I bet,” he continued on.

“Don’t let me inflate your head too much, but yes,” you laugh, “You could call me a fan.”

“Now are you a fan of me or a fan of my talent?” he asks.

“Hmmm...” you hum teasingly, “Both?”

“I’m a fan of you too,” Harry smiles. You thought he had some narcissistic qualities to him but he earned them from being so talented.

You step closer to him with a childish grin of your own, “Just me? Or do you like that I saved you?”

His eyes darken to a deeper sea green color at the thought of you, “I like you. And your actions,” he pauses in what seems to be appreciation, “And how fucking sick it is that you drive a motorcycle,” he adds thoughtfully.

You let out a laugh and a quick thanks, smiling at him widely. You didn’t realize you were staring until you heard him clear a hack from his throat, “So what now?”

“Umm,” you hesitate before carefully choosing your words, “You can kiss me?” you ask.

Harry pauses, eyes wide. You knew you made a mistake with that and you quickly tried to retract your previous question, “I- uh- sorry,” you apologize bashfully, “I definitely read the room wrong. I’m really sorry if I made you uncomfort-”

You were cut off by Harry taking an impulsive step forward, his left hand finding your waist and his right meeting your jaw. His lips met yours with such great force, you didn’t think moving your mouth against his would end well with all the pressure his mouth forced upon yours.

He pulls away from you slowly, letting the feeling of his lips linger on yours, “Read the room perfectly fine, love,” he comments before reattaching your lips.

This time, the kiss was filled with lust and executed more passion than the previous. You smile and let out a breathy gasp when Harry's fingers squeeze your waist where you find yourself very ticklish. He smiles back against your mouth and slides his hand under your sweatshirt, working it up towards your breast.

“Fuck,” you moan into his mouth as he begins to knead your breast with precise movements. His hand covered the majority of your breast, his palm directly on your hard nipple. He grunts as your hand lowers on his body, cupping his cock through the shorts you gave him.

“God, baby,” he moans as you start palming him through his shorts. Your treatment excites him and he starts rolling your hardened nipples between his index finger and thumb, switching breasts every few minutes so keep the pleasure ongoing.

You let out a whine as he pulls back, “Bedroom,” he pants.

You nod hastily, his hand meeting your lower back as he helps you walk the swirling steps that cover the perimeter of the room. You throw your body onto the bed that is laid in the middle of the room, shoving your shorts and panties off and flinging them to the foot of the bed. You do the same with your sweatshirt and Harry follows in suit, falling on top of you when he’s done.

Once again, his mouth finds yours, this time his hands making their way down to your dripping cunt. You let out an exaggerated, “Fuck,” when his cold finger makes contact with your swollen clit.

His legs are straddling your body, hand rubbing quick circles on your clit, and yours finds its way to his hardened cock.

It sat stiff against his stomach, begging to be teased so you obliged. You reach down and take his cock into your hand, squeezing it softly eliciting a loud moan from Harry’s pink lips. He moves his lips down to your neck, burying his head into the crook before sucking harshly, sure to leave you purple.

Your head rolls back and to the side giving him more access to your neck and you quicken your hand movements on his cock, sliding your hand up and down quickly, your thumb swiping on his opening and using precum as a lubricant.

You let out a wrangled moan as his fingers trail down to your hot cunt, sliding in fully, his finger gaining warmth quickly from your core, “Feels so good,” you let out.

He hums into your neck, sitting up and kissing you full on the lips. He lays down and finds himself leaving wet, hot kisses across your skin from your ankle up to your inner thigh. His teeth find a home on the soft flesh of your inner thigh and leave a dark mark on your skin, making you moan at the sight.

As his lips travel towards your clit, you find yourself unable to breathe, constantly gasping for air. Your heart is beating out of your chest as he lays his tongue flat on your core, licking you from the bottom to the top repeatedly.

Your hands find their way into his hair as you tug him closer to your body. He lets out a soft giggle at the motion and kisses your clit in appreciation. He begins his assault on your clit, nibbling it softly and moving it around his tongue as your gasp for air beneath him.

You begin tugging on his hair, begging for more. You needed to feel him fully. He understands your inverbal signal, standing up properly from his place, a bit of cum glistening on his chin. As if he senses your eyes on his chin, he uses his thumb to swipe the cum off, sucking his thumb clean.

You groan at the sight of him teasing you, using your hands to pull him on top of you again, “Please,” you beg.

He smirks at your desperation and lets out a simple, one word question, “Condom?”

You shake your head vigorously. No time for that, you thought. “Wanna feel you,” you tell him, “Is that okay?”

He lets out a laugh, “Yes, what kind of question is that?”

His cock finds its way into your hand again, you lining it up with your slick entrance. Slowly, you push your bodies together, letting them mold together perfectly. You gasp immediately at the feeling of him inside you. You understood his size, but when he was on top of you, you found he was much larger than you first anticipated.

You push him away once he gets halfway through, “Hold on,” you grunt, adjusting your position on your bed. He hums in acceptance, catching his breath as well.

He sighs in relief as you grant him permission to push further, both of you moaning in unison. Him at the tightness and you at the stretch. You both found immediate pleasure within each other without much else needed.

“Fuck,” you groan into his ear as he starts quickening his pace. His both moved in quick, deep strokes as your lips met over and over, making the room sound exclusively of your skin touching and breathy moans.

He slows down a bit, his strokes becoming a bit more sloppy, as he feels you begin to twitch beneath him. “Harry,” you plead.

He smiles, still working you up slowly, “Yes?”

“Fuck me please,” you beg, you head jerking back as he quickens his pace once more.

He increases speed and you shift your body to the side a bit to feel him deeper than before. You were nearing your orgasm and Harry could feel it too. That’s why he’s fucking with you, you tell yourself.

“I’m about to come,” he warns, pulling out of you completely. You whine at the loss, your hand reaching towards his again. “No,” he whispers, his hand swatting your hand away and meeting your clit once more. His fingers work fast, teasing you with soft touches, and soon enough you have come all over his fingers.

“Fuck,” you comment one last time.

//

You and Harry sat on the bed, him holding you close to him from behind, as you watched a film. As engrossed as you were with The Princess Bride, Harry could not relate. He had seen the film multiple times before- a result of growing up with an older sister- and could practically quote it with his eyes closed.

Harry was bored, to say the least.

At first, he tried to make you pay attention to him, but it didn’t work. This was one of your all time favorite movies, after all.

He tried to squeeze you closer to him, play with your hair, even tickle you. Nothing was working. You were zoned into the film, watching as Westley chants ‘As you wish!” as he tumbles from the hilltops, Buttercup quickly realizing her mistake and tumbling down after him.

Harry sighed in frustration. He was needy and horny. He wanted your attention.

His hand trailed down from where it sat on your waist to your legs, spreading them apart as he pleased. You hardly gave the action a second though, spreading your legs at his will and leaning further into his back.

Harry smirked, his hand rubbing up and down your bare thigh, making you shiver at his touch. He understood the effect he had on girls but you weren’t just a girl- you were a woman. A beautiful, sexy, kind woman.

He teased you for a bit, still attempting to get your attention. His goal was an utter failure, though. All he got was a few laughs caused by the film and some slight squirming- not what he expected.

You gasped loudly as Harry’s hand moved its way down towards your core for a second time that night, moving your panties to the side as his index finger met your clit.

He began slowly, rubbing soft, slow circles, “Keep watching,” he’d remind you.

You would let a weak nod through your poker face, trying to diverge your thoughts to the couple portrayed on the screen in front of you, but it was impossible. Harry was all consuming.

The soft and slow circles abruptly became quick, and the one finger became three. His hand laid flat against you, occasionally slipping down into your dripping cunt. You gasped every few moments at a new sensation you felt along your body, whether that be his lips on your ear or his other hand on your breast.

Your leg moves farther from your center, finding a new home propped up on Harry’s bent knee. He pushed your leg up when he brought his knee closer to his chest and rubbed you from what seemed to be the best angle yet, beckoning a, “Right there, fuck,” from your swollen lips.

“Feels good, hm?” Harry asks, his lips right on your ear. You feel your face begin to heat up as pleasure seems to overwhelm your body from the past days events.

“So good, don’t stop,” you edge on.

Harry obediently continues his assault on your clit- fingers moving quickly as your back arches against him in a continuous rhythm, your head thrashing back and forth in harmony, and it was safe to assume that the movie is long forgotten now.

You let out a loud moan, your body beginning to shake with pleasure, as Harry’s other hand found its way to your dripping core. He continued rubbing whilst also penetrating you slowly and teasingly with his fingers.

Within the next minute you came, the room filled with your screams and breathy moans and Harry’s smug laugh. You decided he enjoyed watching you struggle under his hands.

//

It was a longstanding tradition of yours to have tea at the observatory the night after a big storm. You felt it was nice to assess the damage from the one place it could look beautiful.

You woke up to the sound of seagulls pecking at a lighthouse window as they usually the night after a storm. It was theorized that they were on the hunt for food. You turned to look towards Harry, hoping they wouldn’t wake him up. He laid next to you, arm sprawled out and over your shoulder and you were forced to chuckle at the sight because you hadn't seen someone look so good while asleep in a while.

You carefully untangled yourself from his hold and walked downstairs to the kitchen in hopes of making some tea.

You went through the grueling ten minute process of boiling a pot of water on a gas stove before transferring the water into a mug and adding a green tea bag into it, making sure to add a note stating you would be on the top floor just in case Harry woke up before you were back.

The stairs took far too long then necessary to climb but they were long and drawn out, hardly stairs at the point. You reached the top deck with a significantly cooler mug but you didn’t mind. Part of the tradition.

You looked out over the beach- trash littered over the bleachers they didn’t have time to put away, tree branches all over the ground, the sand looking darker than usual- likely drenched from the previous night's rain.

It was an odd sensation- to see birds flying in circles looking for the food and their old homes.

“Well fuck,” you mutter, taking in what you would be cleaning up for the next few days with your dad.

“Woah it looks rough out here,” you hear Harry’s deep and groggy morning voice. You turned to look at him, his eyes hardly open as he stretched his arms out behind him, his torso out on display.

“Yeah, gotta clean it up soon,” you speak softly. Even through the darkest storms, the water stays relatively calm. The waves crashed just as intensely as before, claiming the sand as their own as you watched from a birds eye view.

“Need any help?” he offers.

You smile and shake your head before turning back towards the ocean, “No, that’s fine. You should probably train some more anyway.”

“It’s nice to take a break sometimes too,” he tells you, stepping forward so he is standing directly to your right.

“I guess,” you shrug, “Wasn’t last night a good enough break?”

“Definitely not,” Harry shakes his head.

You shoot him a glare, about to give him a piece of your mind before he continues, “Nowhere near long enough.”

“Well, how long would you like this break to be?” you ask him, turning so your chest is practically touching his.

“Like,” he pauses teasingly, “Like a long time,” he decides.

“Is this your corrupt way of asking me out?” you ask with a smile spread across your lips. Harry nods in response, making you squeal with happiness.

Your arms find their way around his broad shoulders as he hugs you, lifting you up and off the ground slightly.

“So that means you’ll help me clean right?” you ask Harry, making him groan. “I’m just kidding, you can stay here in this lighthouse with me,” you seal your promise with a deep kiss on his lips.

“Hmm, sit in this lighthouse with you all night, surf all day. Sounds like a dream,” Harry comments, his arms finding their way around your body, holding you close to him. Your chests heaved in unison as you found your heartbeat rising.

“You’re a dream.”

[notchesandbullets]

Gifts From the Heart (Soft!Ojiro x Wolf!Reader)

Art credit: Pixiv ID 4177162

Requested by anon: Saw the word Ojiro, came running. Can I request fluffy, wholesome Ojiro x Fem!Reader where Ojiro makes the reader a gift?

A/N: This is a chapter from my unpublished Ojiro x reader book that will be uploaded all at once very soon xD. Stay tuned!! there needs to be more ojiro content out there, this boy is so underrated

[anon, i got so carried away the full fanfic is at 50k words and its climbing im so sorry it took me so long to post what you requested, it spurred on my creativity and now i have a fanfic sitting in my docs waiting to be shown to the world lol]

✨Edit: this is part 10 of Ojiro’s fanfic series titled “Saving Her”. Masterlist for it found here!! ✨

Words: 3.8k

It was a lazy Sunday and everyone was lounging around the Heights Alliance dormitory. Aoyama was sitting at one of the tables with Midoriya, Iida and Uraraka, serving hors d’oeuvres.

It made a great accompaniment to Yaoyorozu’s herbal tea. 

Ojiro gathered what he would need in order to make you your gift. It was almost done, but it was missing a few key finishing touches.

Throughout the time you had spent with them, he had found himself growing more and more attached to you and given your past, he wanted to show you just how much you were welcome here.

Alright, maybe it was a little bit more than that. Maybe it was more along the lines of wanting to confess to you badly, but if he went in with that idea, he was sure he would get rejected. Not to mention, he lacked the courage.

He had roped in the assistance of Yaoyorozu and Hagakure. They were the only ones who knew of his feelings and his plan for your gift, but they roped in the rest of the girls to keep you distracted while he put his plan into motion.

He had been surprised when Hagakure suggested it to him, since he wasn’t able to get you anything from that day at the mall when you all went. You didn’t want anything but what once was bewildering gave him an idea for your next present.

He was the only one who hadn’t gotten you anything, desperately wanting it to be perfect before he gave it to you. 

His lack of creativity was soon solved by one simple thing as his eyes fell on what you had discarded on his bed the day before.

While you were distracted by the girls upstairs, he got to work. Pushing up his sleeves alongside Sato and Koda, he started to prepare what he needed.

Meanwhile, you were having a blast.

Yaoyorozu was teaching you how to braid your own hair so it wouldn’t get in the way and so that your fluffy ears would be shown off and not hidden. You and Asui were talking about the upcoming week where they were going to get trained for the provisional licensing exam. Since you were so new, you wouldn’t be able to take it at the same time as everyone else but that didn’t deter you.

If anything, you were even more pumped to catch up to them.

Things had been rough. You had narrowly escaped a bad situation only for Ojiro to save you. Since then, things had started to snowball one after another, but in the best way possible. Aizawa had arranged a temporary agreement with Principal Nezu concerning your enrollment into UA which also enabled you to stay at the dorms. 

But what once was supposed to be temporary solidified into a permanent situation as Aizawa adopted you and now you were hoping that they would let you stay.

Overtime, you had grown close to all of them. The paperwork had all been filled out but you were nervous if they would all really be okay with letting you join their ranks. You just had to ask your fellow classmates if they would accept you. 

Orjio had been particularly nice to you, taking you under his wing and letting you explore your new surroundings with a safety net that he provided.

You gulped. Just thinking about him made your heart flutter and tail wag. 

“Oooo, Y/N’s thinking about him again.” Ashido teased, sidling over to you from her closet to where you were sitting on the floor by the window. 

“Huh?” You blinked, your fluffy ears twitching. “Who?”

Uraraka swatted your arm playfully, mischief gleaming in her eyes. “Oh come on!! You don’t expect us to fall for that again after all this time!! Who do you take us for?!”

You flushed, gaze dropping into your lap where your hands were folded neatly. “I-I don’t know what you’re talking about…”

Trailing off with a nervous mumble, you fiddled with your tail as Yaoyorozu shot you an empathetic smile. 

“It’s alright, Y/N-chan,” She reassured kindly. “You don’t have to talk about it if it makes you uncomfortable.”

“But Yao-Momo!!” Ashido pouted. “She was about to admit her feelings for him!!”

“No I wasn’t!!” You protested, then clapped a hand over your mouth but it was too late.

The damage had been done.

Squeals burst out all around you and you had the sudden urge to take refuge in your room, no longer wanting to be a part of this humiliating conversation. 

“How long?!” Ashido shrieked in your ear, tugging on your arm, wanting to know the exact time it started.

“I don’t know!!” You cried out, burying your face in your hands, utterly embarrassed.

Uraraka and Hagakure let out a gasp at your indirect confession but squealed excitedly as realization finally hit them.

“You guys would be so cute together!!” Hagakure gushed.

Uraraka’s eyes crinkled up joyously. “Aww!! I can already picture them out on their first date!!”

“Guys, give her space to breathe.” Jirou said, rolling her eyes at her overexcited friends as she freed you from their grasp.

Yaoyorozu seconded that, even though she was equally as excited as her friends at this new information. 

“I didn’t know you had feelings for Ojiro-san.” She lightly teased with a soft smile on her face, patting your back like an older sister would.

“I don’t!!” You denied but winced at the collective glare that was thrown your way. “... Maybe…”

Ashido sprang up to her feet. “She’s totally crushing on him!!”

You grabbed onto her arm to prevent her from leaving the room, finding Ojiro and outing your secret. “No I’m not!!”

“Are too!!”

“Am not!!”

“ARE TOO!!!!!”

“NO!!!!”

The both of you fell back on top of the bed, bouncing a couple of times on the mattress as the other girls forced the two of you to sit down. 

Even Asui seemed on board. 

“I think you would be able to make him very happy, kero.” She relayed, a finger resting on her chin. “He already thinks very highly of you.”

You couldn’t help but blush at that, wiggling around uncomfortably as your heartbeat echoed loudly in your ears. 

“W-What…?”

Hagakure shoved your shoulder and you nearly toppled over, not expecting her to do that.

“Y/N!!” She chastised, wagging a finger at you. “You can’t be serious!! Haven’t you noticed it?!”

You were lost. “Noticed what??”

“Oh dear.” Yaoyorozu commented, gazing at you sympathetically.

“Someone tell her or else I’m going to explode!!!” Ashido shouted, throwing her hands up in the air.

You opened your mouth to ask just what was going on when the door suddenly opened and everybody fell silent. 

Todoroki didn’t do or say anything. He simply inclined his head to the side and the girls who were so docile for a few seconds burst into action. 

You weren’t sure exactly what happened but within the next minute, you were being shoved outside and hastily instructed to go downstairs in exactly five minutes while they all raced out, Ashido dragging a reluctant Todoroki along with them.

Since you left your phone back in Ojiro’s room and you didn’t want to be rude and barge in just to get it, you stayed outside in the hallway, counting the seconds that passed until five minutes had passed.

You lagged behind, not really sure what to expect. They had never acted like this around you before. 

Maybe Aizawa had told them of your permanent stay at Heights Alliance and they were all against it. 

But that didn’t make much sense since they went to such lengths to be so friendly and open with. 

Shaking your head to clear the muddled thoughts, you continued on down the staircase until you reached the first floor.

When you arrived, it was dark. All the lights were turned off, which was strange because you vividly recalled Iida saying something about how important it was to keep the lights on 24/7 so that none of the students tripped or anything. 

Mostly for your benefit since you tended to trip over air.

Claws sliding out, you narrowed your eyes, baring your canines threatening as you scanned for any signs of movement. 

Putting into the play the training Aizawa had taught you, you crouched low to the ground, slinking along the abandoned corridor. 

Adrenaline pumping through your veins, you crept around the corner, coming to halt just before the common room. 

Here goes nothing. 

You stepped out.

Then, several things happened at once. 

You were blinded as the lights suddenly flashed on and you shrieked, jumping on the nearest person out of instinct. 

“What the fuck, dumbass!!!” Bakugou raged as he caught you when you tunneled into him. 

You squeaked frightfully, backpedaling until you were a sufficient distance away from the group of twenty now standing in front of you, clearly seeing them for the first time.

“I told you she would get scared!!” Jirou chastised, smacking the sheepish-looking pikachu on the head.

“I’m sorry, I thought it would be fine!!” Kaminari argued back, gripping his head in pain. “Ow!! That hurts!!”

“Serves you right!!” She snapped back.

You retracted your claws, reverting back to the adorable wolf that they all knew and loved now that you realized there wasn’t any threat. Your ears perked up and your lips curled into a smile of disbelief.

Beaming happily as Ashido smothered you in a hug, you blinked back tears as your eyes fell on the banner that said, “Welcome Home!!!”, in bright lettering above the entire class of 1-A.

You couldn’t believe your eyes. “You guys did all of this for me?”

Uraraka gestured to the pile of presents behind Shoji and Tokoyami. 

“It was Ojiro-kun’s idea for the presents and Hagakure’s for a party.” She told you cheekily, pointing to the embarrassed boy hiding behind the counter to make himself appear smaller. “We just all pitched in to help.”

“You didn’t have to do all of this for me…” You said softly, in awe and vastly overwhelmed.

“You’re staying with us from now on.” Todoroki quipped plainly from the back row. “This was in order.”

Hagakure rushed over to you. “Do you like it?! Are you surprised?!”

You nodded and squeezed her tightly, thanking her before making your way over to Ojiro, who had yet to acknowledge you. At least, with words. 

He couldn’t tear his gaze away from you, completely under your spell as you padded over to him. 

Blushing, you tucked a lock of hair behind your ear, then cursed yourself for doing something so embarrassing in front of your long-time crush. 

“Mashirao?” You said curiously, noticing his arms were hidden behind his back.

Man, he was never going to get tired of hearing your sweet voice saying his name in such an intimate way.

Winding his tail around your waist, he tugged you closer until you fell into his chest. You shivered as you felt one of his arms snake around you, as if shielding you from the people who were crowding around you.

Your face burned and you were thankful it was hidden from all of your classmates as they ‘awwed’ at the two of you. Vaguely, you heard someone slyly note how cute the two of you were and you swore, feeling more self-conscious than ever. 

You didn’t get a chance to wiggle out of his hold to smack Ashido on the head for her comment since Ojiro decided to give you what was behind his back.

It was a small, carefully wrapped gift box, not impressive on the outside by any means, but your eyes sparkled and your heart skipped a beat. 

Seeing the expression on your face, his shoulders shook with laughter. Your eyes were shining in excitement at seeing his present as opposed to all the other ones that were much larger than his. 

He strangely felt touched by it. 

You placed it on the kitchen island, running your fingers over the velvet bow and pretty gift wrap. You almost didn’t want to ruin it. 

“Oh come on,” Ashido squealed in frustration the longer you prolonged it and everyone else crowded around you. “Open it already!!”

You shot her a playful glare, taking your time despite the many groans that sounded around you as you carefully unwrapped the neatly decorated box. By the time you finally finished taking off all the wrapping paper, everyone, even Bakugou, was leaning forward in anticipation. 

Taking off the lid so that it covered whatever was in the box from their prying eyes, even though there were several loud protests, your eyes widened as you saw what was nestled inside several layers of crinkled paper.

Reaching in eagerly, you pulled it out and held it up. 

It was a lion plushie. A beautifully crafted, complete with whiskers and a fluffy mane, stuffed lion. And you already adored it. 

There were some disappointed complaints that his present didn’t live up to the hype they were expected to believe, but Ojiro didn’t hear them, only having eyes for you. As they started to disperse throughout the living room, you couldn’t tear your gaze from the cute lion.

“I seem to recall someone getting ahold of the giraffe in my room.” Ojiro teased with a knowing smile. “You seemed to like to have something to hold onto at night, so I figured another stuffed animal couldn’t hurt, right?”

Your ears swiveled happily as you heard him say that and you couldn’t refrain from bouncing in place, tail swishing behind you. 

“It was so long ago, I would’ve thought you had forgotten by now.” You beamed, smiling from ear to ear as you tested out its squishiness. “Where in the world did you get this?! It’s so plushy!!”

When he didn’t answer you right away, you paused your shower of adoration over the beloved lion, tilting your head curiously at Ojiro, who was now bright red and mumbling something under his breath.

“Huh?” You squeaked, unsure if you really heard him right.

His throat bobbed as he swallowed, grinning at you sheepishly. “Well, it’s just— The stores didn’t really have any lions that looked cute enough when I took my sister to the mall and that’s when she suggested making one for you.”

Your jaw dropped to the floor.

“I remember you saying that you liked lions because… well, you said they reminded you of me so I really wanted to get you a lion.” Ojiro continued, not noticing your reaction, too caught up in his rambling. 

You had told him one night after playing with his tail to calm you down after you had a nightmare and he hadn’t forgotten it since.

“Holly-chan helped me sew it, I got the materials from Aizawa-sensei and Shoji helped me attach the tail and the mane and everything else.” He told you, pointing out all of the features that were carefully crafted together with the utmost love.

Your heart skipped a beat.

He hesitated, now picking up on the fact that you had yet to say anything. “Is… Do you like it?”

You would’ve punched him for his obliviousness if it weren’t for the fact that you didn’t want to let your lion go in order to do so. “Are you kidding?! I love it!!”

Ojiro’s chest deflated as he released a breath he didn’t know he had been holding in, scratching the back of his neck. “Oh, thank All Might.”

“You could’ve done this in private, you know.” You lightly teased, brushing your fingers over the soft material in awe. “I’m sure it would’ve been less stressful for you.”

He made it for you. You’ve never had anyone buy anything for you for the longest time, let alone make something for you with their own two hands. The time and energy it must’ve taken, not to mention the thought he put into it. 

That was it. You were going to explode with happiness.

“I was going to.” He said, shooting a look over your shoulder at a satisfied Shoji and a smug Tokoyami gazing at you from the sidelines while everyone else wrecked havoc on the common floor. “But everybody kind of wanted to see what it was. And your reaction.”

You giggled, hugging it tightly to your chest. “Thank you, I love it, Mashirao.”

He kissed your forehead, murmuring, “I’m really glad you do, Y/N.”

Your heart skipped a beat and you bit your lip to stop your smile from getting too wide. It was too much. You felt like you were going to burst.

“Y/N?” Ojiro asked worriedly, cupping your chin and furrowed his eyebrows. “Your face is all red.”

“Dummy!!” You pouted, pushing him away and clutching the lion plushie tighter. “It’s your fault, you know!!”

He chuckled, patting your head. Your lashes fluttered shut at the stimulation, throaty growl emitting in approval at the affectionate gesture. 

Ojiro’s gaze softened, brimming with love. He couldn’t believe how far you came from being that shy, wary girl back then.

You raised the stuffed animal up, tapping it on its nose. “Your name will be Koko!!”

Squeezing it tightly to your chest, you rocked back and forth on your heels, gazing at it with adoring eyes when you held it up. 

Ojiro’s heart melted at seeing you so happy. 

Your other friends insisted that you open their gifts next, nearly dragging you over the table. Everyone had given you something, even Bakugou. 

You objected to their generosity, protesting that they spent too much on you already the first time around but it was like all of them went deaf and ignored your objections, shoving box after box in your hands. 

Sato had made sure to have enough food on hand for moments exactly like these, when everybody got swept up in the energy of it all and were literally bouncing off the walls. 

Somehow, somewhere, Aizawa was found and dragged out of his cave to join his students in the party. But he mostly was out of the way, watching from afar as you were handed gift after gift.

Aoyama had gotten ahold of a painted tea set that looked very fragile and it was paired with Yaoyorozu’s jasmine tea she had gifted you. 

It took a couple of turns for you to realize that they had collaborated when giving you things. 

Sato’s cookbook filled with a couple of his own added recipes he knew you loved went with the polished pots and pans Shoji gave you. Tokoyami and Asui’s were combined into a patterned quilt that everyone had pitched in to help with. 

The two tickets you got for the autumn festival stumped you but that mystery was soon cleared up when Todoroki gave you what looked to be an extremely expensive, embroidered kimono.

“When you two finally go on a date.” He said monotonously, pointing a finger at Midoriya and Jirou. “They said that you two will have to confess first, though.”

Your jaw dropped and you and Ojiro both turned opposite ways, unable to look each other in the eye in case that claim wasn’t true.

You had to physically push Ashido and Hagakure away when they made kissing sounds at you, embarrassed beyond belief.

Ojiro had to fight to keep Shoji at bay but his friend was much stronger than him and the tailed teenager ended up losing his balance and careened into you.

You yelped as your face ended up right in front of his, a millimeter away. Breath catching in your throat, your heart stopped and he audibly gulped at your proximity.

Neither one of you moved. 

It wasn’t until you shakily held up the tickets Kirishima had given you did he blink.

“Would…” You swallowed hard, gathering your courage. “Would you like to go with me?”

Ojiro didn’t even think of saying no. 

A huge smile broke out on your face as he said yes and you covered your face with your hands as Uraraka and Ashido squealed, instantly hiding into Ojiro’s chest out of instinct.

He didn’t mind but the heat that was creeping up his neck turned into a full-fledged blush as he hugged you, keeping you close even after Shoji and Tokoyami sent him a pointed glance.

Mouthing for them to mind their own business, he held you until you collected yourself enough to face them. Even then, he kept you seated on his lap, running his fingers through your fluffy tail as you opened the rest of your gifts. 

He knew you were going to cry by the end of the night, most likely when the two of you were alone, but he couldn’t help but agree with everything that his classmates had thought of for you.

You had been without love for so long that when you saw it, you didn’t know what to do. He would take every opportunity to show you how much you meant to him and how precious your life was.

After hours of playing video games, eating Sato’s delicious cooking and getting caught up in Kaminari’s schemes as he tried to push you and Ojiro together not-so-discreetly before Jirou bonked him on the head, you were so tired you felt like you could fall asleep standing up. 

Aizawa had left a while ago, once Bakugou destroyed the TV remote, lacking the energy to deal with his students outside of the classroom. 

You had run up to him, begging cutely for a hug and he hesitated but didn’t refuse you. 

Everyone except for Ojiro’s jaws dropped as you called him dad so nonchalantly but they were even more shocked when Aizawa simply ruffled your hair and told you not to stay up too late. 

You had made your way back into Ojiro’s arms as soon as the older man left his student to their craziness, and you tumbled onto an empty sofa with him cushioning your fall.

He smiled at you fondly, eyes softening as he swept the hair away from your eyes, his heart stopping as you nuzzled into his chest. 

“Princess…” He murmured, tucking a lock behind your ear, as he had seen you do earlier. “Are you happy?”

A smile curled against his neck. 

“Mmhm…” You hummed happily. “Thank you, Mashirao.”

For the rest of the night, you didn’t let go of the stuffed lion he gave you once, eventually falling asleep on the couch with your new present tucked safely in your arms. 

He wrapped his arms around your waist, squeezing you once as he used his tail to pull a blanket over the both of you. 

“Anything for you, Y/N.”

Taglist: @katsukis-sad-angel​

[p-eppermintea]

love is a drug (but it never comes with a warning)

AO3 LINK

Pairing: Erwin Smith / Levi Ackerman (Eruri) Characters: Erwin Smith, Levi Ackerman, Isabel Magnolia, Farlan Church Rating: Explicit Warnings: No warnings apply Word Count: 13186 Tags: Sexual Content, Hook-up to Lovers, Pining, Angst, Croissant the cat, Love Confessions, Christmas, Yes I wrote the Christmas scenes in June

Excerpt / Summary:

So, here’s the thing. Levi really isn’t the type of person who invites strangers over for sex. Sure, he had a couple of hook-ups, quick fumbles, and one-night stands after nights out in his younger years – but that’s about the extent of it.

--

NOTE: I started this in October and very slowly finished it over the past 8-ish months. Quality control courtesy of ADHD and my inability to force myself to edit, mixed with my impatience to post. Sorry about mistakes!

So, here’s the thing.

Levi really isn’t the type of person who invites strangers over for sex. Sure, he had a couple of hook-ups, quick fumbles, and one-night stands after nights out in his younger years – but that’s about the extent of it.

The older he gets, the less he cares about sex. He’s slowly paying off a mortgage, has hobbies and a good job and a couple of even better friends. Meeting people just seems like a waste of time, and sex is just so unnecessary and messy.

But after almost two years of celibacy and with the house to himself for the weekend, he caves and downloads Grindr. He pours himself a glass of wine, downs it, and meanders around the house for a little bit. He feeds his cat. Pours himself another glass of wine. Polishes his already meticulously clean coffee table. He finally opens the app properly.

Making a profile doesn’t take him too long, and most of that time is taken up by choosing a profile picture. He settles on the gym photo he sent to Isabel a week earlier. He doesn’t really take a lot of photos of himself either, so it’s not exactly hard for him to choose.

Levi takes one look at the array of profiles before he sighs heavily and throws his phone to the other side of the couch. This is so stupid.

He doesn’t know why he’s so nervous. He’s thirty, for fuck’s sake. He’s gone through all of the stupid hormonal-fuelled confusion from his teen and early adult years, and he hasn’t been self-conscious about himself for as long as he can remember. He doesn’t even get nervous before big presentations. So why is this making his heart race and his palms sweat?

He sits and finishes his drink slowly, listening as his phone buzzes every now and then in front of him.

About twenty minutes pass before he eventually gives in and grabs his phone again.

Three messages. Alright, not bad. He can deal with three messages.

They aren’t really anything special. It’s about what Levi expected; “Top or bottom?”, “Come here often?”. And, of course, a dick pic straight away. Levi scoffs at that last one. It’s an okay photo, he supposes. It’s a just dick, though, there isn’t really much more to it. He’s worth more than some low-effort and unsolicited dick pic, though, so the message is ultimately ignored.

He’s actually a little disappointed by the choices. Maybe he’s a bit too old for this, but it just seems like people have gotten lazy when it comes to looking for hookups. They could’ve at least put some effort into their first messages, for fuck’s sake.

Levi shoots a lazy reply of “Switch” to the first guy. He looks okay in his profile picture. Attractive, but with soft features and the build of a particularly thin tree. He doesn’t really find himself gravitating towards that type of man too often.

Mr. Cheesy-Pick-Up-Line is more his type. Tall, wide shoulders, chiselled, and downright handsome. Erwin, thirty-five. A little bit closer to his age, too.

Too bad his first message is so lame.

Erwin: Come here often?

Levi: What is this, the nineties? Does that even ever work?

Levi: I just downloaded this.

Erwin: Not yet, but I’ve got my fingers crossed! What brings you here?

Levi: Looking for a hook-up, I guess.

Erwin: Any luck?

Levi: Not yet. Unless one mediocre dick pic counts.

Erwin: Unfortunate. I find that it’s quite rare to find a decent one. I could definitely send a much better one

Erwin: That was a joke. I think. Unless…?

This guy is so lame.

Levi: Ha. Ha. Ha. Hilarious.

He chews on his lip, contemplating. He flicks off the lid of the wine bottle and takes a swig. Fuck it. He might as well throw himself right in the deep end and get it over with.

Levi: Alright then. I’ll warn you though, I’m a tough crowd to impress.

And, well.

It’s something, alright. He was right, at least – it is much better. Warm early-morning lighting, with soft shadows that define the sharp planes of his hips. He’s kneeling on a bed, hard and curved in his hand, and okay. Levi’s stomach twists deliciously.

Fuck it, fuck it, fuck it.

Levi: When can you come over?

--

When turns out to be right this minute.

Levi chews on his fingernails for the entire forty minutes it takes for Erwin to get to his house.

It’s not until he hears a car door slamming closed out on his driveway that it finally sets in. He’s known this guy for approximately… What, an hour now? And he’s coming over. To his house. At damn near ten o’clock at night.

Oh God, what if he’s a total catfish. Or a serial killer?

By the time there’s a knock at the door, Levi still hasn’t decided whether or not he can actually go through with it. He spends way too long pacing by the door and swearing to himself under his breath. He picks up his cat, and puts her down, and then picks her up again, before finally opening the door.

Erwin is standing in front of him, way taller and way more handsome than his photo looked. “Levi?”

The cat squirms in his arms. “Um.” Levi swallows, his throat suddenly dry. “Yeah, that’s me.” He steps aside and gestures inside, inviting him in.

Erwin steps inside, moving slowly and smiling kindly at Levi on his way past. “Cute cat,” he comments while Levi is bumping the door closed with his hip. He steps closer – way too close – and immediately starts rubbing behind her ears.

“Her name is Croissant,” Levi mumbles. She’s a little sand-coloured thing, with big green eyes and a fluffy tail. The name suits her. “She’s my housemate’s cat.”

Erwin laughs. “Nice to meet you, Croissant.” He’s leaning down and cooing over her, and she’s purring. That little shit, who almost never purrs when Levi is petting her, is actually purring.

Before Levi can get too annoyed that Erwin is giving the cat more attention, Erwin straightens up and looks at Levi with a bright grin. “How shall we do this, then?” he asks. “Would you feel more comfortable if we sit down and talk first, or just get into it?”

Levi contemplates for a moment, Croissant squirming in his arms until she breaks free from his hold and dashes off into the kitchen. It’s not like they’re on a date or anything, so getting to know each other first seems a little pointless to him. “What do you usually do?”

“I don’t do this too often, but when I do, I find it easier to start slow.” He’s already pretty close, but he steps forwards, moving more and more into Levi’s space. They’re basically breathing in each other’s mouths. Levi wets his dry as fuck lips and shuffles nervously. “Is this okay?”

Levi nods, and Erwin’s hand starts travelling lightly up his arm. His body jerks automatically in response, but he quickly relaxes. His hand eventually stops on Levi’s elbow, and he leans even closer. “Tell me when to stop,” he mumbles.

Erwin is taking his sweet time, studying Levi’s face. He squirms under his steely blue gaze. The anticipation is fucking killing him. It’s almost unbearable.

So Levi kisses Erwin first. He raises up onto the tips of his toes and smashes their lips together, throwing his arms up around Erwin’s neck, slow be damned.

It’s good, as far as first kisses go. Erwin is soft and tender, but there’s this underlying dominance to him. He allows Erwin to kiss his way into his mouth, his hands sliding up Levi’s arms and finding their way onto his cheeks.

They move slowly to the living room, hands and mouths roaming carelessly, and clothes slowly finding themselves strewn out on the floor. They fall onto the couch together, Erwin pulling Levi’s shirt off over his head and dropping it onto the floor next to them. Levi shudders at the sight of clothes discarded on the floor haphazardly, but then Erwin is kissing him again, and pushing him down into the couch cushions, and climbing on top of him, and suddenly he just doesn’t mind.

“Do you mind if I mark you?” Erwin asks, looking down at Levi with narrow eyes.

Levi’s breath catches in his throat, and he shakes his head quickly. Erwin moves downwards, and Levi’s head immediately falls back to expose his neck, his eyes rolling back when Erwin’s lips attach to his skin.

Part of Levi wants to roll Erwin over and make him beg – he usually takes on a more dominant role during sex. But they’ve only been making out for about ten minutes, and Levi just wants to lay there and let Erwin do whatever he wants to him, as many times as he wants. Levi groans quietly as Erwin digs his teeth into his skin and sucks hard.

They just seem to click.

--

Afterwards, when they’re both sweaty and exhausted and very much satisfied, Levi makes Erwin a cup of tea, and they sit in the kitchen and drink in silence.

After Levi’s usual hook-ups, he usually either kicks the guy out, or passes out immediately afterwards and pretends to still be asleep in the morning as he sneaks out, never to be seen again. He doesn’t have time for casual conversation with random guys from clubs.

This time feels different – he actually kind of likes Erwin. He’s definitely the best sex he’s ever had, that’s for sure. He really has no idea what to say, though.

Croissant is sitting in the doorway, eyeing them both suspiciously. Levi can feel her judging them.

“So,” Erwin starts, setting his cup down. “What happens now?”

“I don’t know,” Levi admits. He takes a sip of his tea. “You do this more than I do, you tell me.”

“I mean… unless you’d like me to go, perhaps we could put on a movie?” Erwin’s eyebrows wriggle suggestively. It’s stupid, and lame, and annoyingly cute. “And not watch it?”

And that’s how they find themselves back on Levi’s couch, making out lazily with some shitty rom-com that Erwin chose playing on the TV.

Erwin is exactly the right size for Levi to be far too comfortable lying on top of him. He’s big enough to wrap himself almost completely around Levi’s body. He feels oddly secure.

He’s also the perfect size, it seems, for Croissant to insert herself directly in-between them, pushing her little head between the two of them and lying down directly on Erwin’s chest. She starts purring immediately, flexing her claws in Erwin’s shirt, and flicking Levi with her tail.

“Oh wow,” Levi says, sitting up and crossing his arms. “Are you some kind of cat hypnotist or something?”

Erwin laughs, scratching Croissant behind the ears. “I guess she just likes me.”

Levi scoffs. “The little bitch doesn’t like anyone except my dumbshit housemate,” he replies. “She doesn’t even like me that much.”

“That’s surprising, you’re very pleasant,” Erwin replies, smiling cheekily. The joke is obvious behind his eyes and toothy smile.

“If my stupid cat wasn’t between us right now, I’d kick your ass.”

Erwin laughs, a bright and hearty sound that rumbles deep in his chest and startles Croissant. She merely looks at him in alarm for a moment, and then goes back to purring. He continues to fuss over her, making little kissy faces and squishing her face delicately in his hands. “You are so cute,” he coos, wrapping his arms around her gently and pulling her closer to his chest.

All Levi can really do is just watch as his Grindr hook-up, still in just his underwear and a T-shirt, gives his cat more attention than him. He can’t help but smile a little bit to himself, though, as he watches Erwin interacting with Croissant. It’s actually pretty endearing, in a way.

“I think someone’s in love,” Levi comments. He watches for a little bit longer, before his erection starts to go down and he gets a little too impatient. “Okay, time’s up. Shove her off and pay attention to me again.”

Erwin rubs his nose lovingly against Croissant’s forehead and picks her up, putting her down on the carpet. She looks disappointed, but opts for staring up at them instead of jumping up again. He looks back up at Levi and wets his lips, pulling him down with a large hand on the back of his neck.

It’s not until after half a movie, two more rounds, and a few episodes of Friends later, that Erwin yawns loudly, stretching his arms over his head.

“It’s late,” Levi observes. The clock above the TV reads somewhere after 2 AM. He really wasn’t intending for Erwin to stay for so long, but part of him really didn’t want him to leave. If anyone asks him, he’ll probably say that hormones were compelling him to let Erwin stay – it has been a while since he’s had any kind of sex, after all. But the truth is that he actually just really likes spending time with him.

“Yeah,” Erwin replies slowly.

“You’re probably too tired to drive home.”

“I guess I am, yeah.” Erwin’s eyebrow rises, waiting.

Levi looks down at his hands, scraping at an invisible speck on his thumbnail. “So maybe you should stay for the night. Y’know. So you don’t fall asleep at the wheel and die.”

Erwin huffs out a laugh. “That sounds good to me.”

Levi stands up, rubbing at his tired eyes with his sleeve. He reaches out his hand sheepishly, and leads Erwin into his bedroom – Croissant following close by.

“Just don’t leave in the middle of the night and steal my shit,” Levi grumbles. “I’ll know.”

--

When Levi wakes up at 9 AM in the morning (which is uncharacteristically late for him), he’s almost shocked that Erwin is still in the bed with him. For some reason, he kind of expected him to get up and disappear during the night. He doesn’t seem like the type, but there’s always the possibility. And of course, Croissant is curled up on the pillow, right next to his head, and snoring quietly.

He sits up in bed and watches them for a little bit. While Croissant is a bit of a cuddle bug sometimes, she’s never really connected with anyone as quickly as she seems to be connecting with Erwin. Even when Isabel brought her home as a rescue kitten – it took her a couple of months to get to this point. What’s so special about Erwin, then?

Levi is almost tempted to take a photo of the two for Isabel, but he really doesn’t want to be that guy who takes weird creepy photos of his hook-ups. He also doesn’t even want to think about all the questions and comments she’ll have for him. Knowing her, she’d be on the first train back, just to get a glimpse at Erwin. No, it’s probably better he keeps this to himself. She’ll inevitably find out eventually, though.

Erwin shifts and groans in his sleep, and Levi startles, whipping his head the other way. He quietly crawls out of bed and retreats into his en suite, closing the door carefully behind him. He busies himself with brushing his teeth, keeping an ear out in case Erwin stirs more.

He has no idea what he’s going to do when Erwin wakes up. He supposes he should make him breakfast and tea, and then what? Would it be rude to ask him to leave after that? He could always use work as an excuse if he needs to.

Levi sits on the side of the bathtub for a little bit, eyeing the spiderweb in the corner of his ceiling with disgust. It’s been there for a few weeks, but he doesn’t have the heart to get rid of it while there’s a spider still living there. After all, she keeps the flies out.

He sighs loudly and gets up, leaving the bathroom quietly. Erwin is sitting up in bed with Croissant, stroking her back quietly. Unfazed by Levi’s re-entrance, she rolls over onto her back, purring loudly as Erwin rubs her belly.

“Wow, you have her so whipped,” Levi observes.

Erwin smiles up at Levi. “I guess I just have the magic touch or something.”

Levi lingers in the doorway, shuffling his feet. He watches as Erwin leans over and presses his face into Croissant’s chest, scratching her cheeks. It’s stupidly cute, and Levi hates it.

“Um, so,” Levi starts. “Sleep well?” He cringes. Small talk really isn’t his thing, obviously.

Erwin sits up, smiling handsomely up at Levi. “I did, thank you.”

Levi sits down on the edge of the bed, reaching out to Croissant and softly petting her head. She looks up at him, looking downright offended that he’d even dare to look at her right now. In one swift motion, she flips over and bolts out of the room, sprinting down the hallway at full speed.

They both sit in silence, avoiding eye contact like the plague. Or, at least Levi avoids it. When he finally looks up at Erwin, he’s looking right back at him. His cheeks turn hot.

It’s not long until Erwin is pushing him down into the mattress and slowly kissing his way down Levi’s chest. His mouth is hot and wet when he takes him all the way down.

--

Levi makes both of them breakfast and they eat quietly in the kitchen, exchanging casual small talk every now and then. Erwin is a sous chef. He has no siblings, both of his parents are dead, and he lives alone. He likes dogs more than cats, but cats are cool, too.

They both have such regular, boring lives. No wonder Erwin is so freaky in bed.

Erwin puts his empty teacup down carefully and stretches, groaning loudly as he does. “I have to go,” he starts. Levi deflates a little, strangely disappointed. Erwin continues, “I’d really like to see you again, though.”

“I’d like that too.”

They say an awkward goodbye to each other at the door. Levi gives Erwin his phone number with a shy, “Call me whenever,” and watches as Erwin gets in his car and drives away.

Croissant sits by the door for most of the day.

--

Levi: I think you broke my cat.

Erwin: Oh?

The image Levi attaches is of Croissant, sleeping right next to the front door.

Levi: She’s been here since you left yesterday.

Erwin: I guess she misses me!

He also replies with a dorky laughing emote, and seriously Levi is so close to just blocking him. What is he, eighty-five?

Levi: My housemate came home, and the cat barely even looked at her. Usually, you can’t keep them away from each other.

Erwin: Oops! :)

Levi: She might get too lovesick, so you might have to come over again soon, maybe.

Levi physically cringes after hitting send on that one. This sort of weird flirting thing is new to him, but he quite likes Erwin. He never knew how enjoyable slightly awkward non-conversations and really good sex could actually be. It’s enjoyable enough to actually let himself talk like this, he supposes.

Erwin: Just tell me when

--

When Erwin comes over for the second time that Tuesday afternoon, he immediately scoops Croissant up into his arms and rocks her in his arms, pressing little kisses onto her forehead. She squirms in his arms until he loosens his grip and climbs up onto his shoulders.

Isabel slides up next to Levi, eyeing them both curiously. “Wow, I thought he was joking,” she comments, eyes wide. “But there she is, happy as a peach.”

They go through the weird introductory stage as fast as they can. Luckily, Isabel and Erwin are both rays of fucking sunshine, so they get along really easily, readily going into a full conversation about Croissant while Levi stands there awkwardly. They don’t talk for too long – Croissant is far too insistent on Erwin’s full attention for that – and soon move to the kitchen. The plan is for Erwin to cook dinner, Isabel to “have a nosy at her big bro’s new man” (her words), and Levi to suffer eternally until she finally leaves them alone.

Isabel sits herself down on one of the bar stools at the kitchen island, resting her chin in her hands and looking between Levi and Erwin. She’s smiling uncontrollably at them, and it’s seriously creeping Levi out. She makes a happy little noise when Erwin sets Croissant down in her lap. Surprisingly, she settles right down, staring back at Erwin with big eyes.

Isabel and Erwin get back into their easy conversation, with Levi chiming in every now and then, while Erwin gets to work. He’s making vegan spaghetti and meatballs, as per Isabel’s request. Levi and Isabel half-play Scrabble while they wait, and Croissant eventually jumps down from her lap in favour of following Erwin around the kitchen – nearly tripping him up every five minutes.

It’s getting dark outside by the time Erwin finishes. Levi pours them all a glass of wine each, and they eat at the dining table.

Surprisingly to himself, Levi finds himself really enjoying himself. Erwin and Isabel seem to get along really well, which is good. He probably wouldn’t be able to see him anymore if she didn’t like him. It’s not exactly hard to get Isabel to like you, so if she doesn’t like someone, there must really be something wrong with them – especially if they’re willing to make dinner. And enough for leftovers, at that.

“God, you should cook for us every day,” Isabel groans, shoving her clear plate forwards. “I will give you Levi’s entire paycheque to be the head chef at Casa de Levi and Isabel.”

Erwin laughs, scratching his neck and blushing bashfully. “Oh, well…” he trails off, glancing at Levi, who just shrugs. “In that case, I’d quit my job in a heartbeat. I’ll even cook dinners for little Croissant here.” He looks down at her, where she insisted on curling up on his lap while they ate. She’s usually not allowed to be at the dinner table while they eat, but… well, Levi couldn’t exactly say no to all three of them, could he?

Isabel claps her hands together and looks at Levi with mock-pleading eyes, jutting out her bottom lip. “Oh please, Levi, can we keep him?”

Levi raises an eyebrow and pretends to think about it for a moment. He might as well play along. “I guess so, but only if you promise to clean up after him.”

Next to him, Erwin chuckles quietly. He reaches over subtly and places a hand on Levi’s knee under the table. Levi nearly jumps out of his skin, but manages to disguise it as shifting in his seat. His hand shifts, moving upwards slowly and eventually settling again high up on his thigh. When he glances at Erwin, all he gets is a small, polite smile.

Isabel grins hugely at Erwin, leaning forwards. “Looks like you’re staying here forever, then.”

“You’ll have to help me pack a bag,” he counters, somehow smiling back with the same intensity as Isabel. All while slowly sliding his hand between Levi’s thighs. When he opens his legs a little bit more, almost instinctively, Erwin’s hand moves further forwards. He rubs Levi through his jeans slowly, and Levi feels himself hardening, and okay, okay, okay.

Levi jumps up, completely startling Croissant and causing her to wriggle off of Erwin’s lap and shoot off out of the kitchen. “I’ll clean up,” he blurts out. He busies himself with taking all of the plates and empty wine glasses to the sink. Erwin looks up at Levi as he takes his plate, one eyebrow raised in concern. He smiles minutely, just to assure him that everything’s okay.

He cleans the dishes as quickly as he can manage whilst still being as meticulous as he usually is, and Erwin and Isabel continue their casual conversation quietly amongst themselves. He dries off his hands and turns around, tossing the handtowel at Isabel’s head. “Alright, fuck off now, it’s my turn.”

Isabel stands up abruptly and throws the towel back at him, missing completely. She’s smiling. “Alright, Mr. Grumpy Bones, I’m going!” She turns to Erwin on her way out and gives a little wave. “It was nice to meet you, I’ll see you soon.”

“Yeah, you too!”

She turns back just before she leaves the room and stares Levi down, her eyes saying, “Don’t you dare fuck in the kitchen,” in every way.

Levi huffs and slowly walks towards Erwin, waiting until he hears Isabel close her bedroom door behind her until he finally throws one leg over Erwin’s legs and climbs into his lap. “That was pretty mean,” he tells him, quiet and under his breath. He grazes his lips lightly against Erwin’s cheek, feeling him shudder.

“What was?” Erwin asks, smirking slyly.

“You know.” He nudges Erwin’s lips gently; not kissing him yet, but teasing. He puts a hand on Erwin’s cheek, using his thumb to part his lips and open up his mouth, and Erwin chases Levi’s tongue with his own.

They finally kiss, Erwin sighing contently and wrapping his arms perfectly around Levi’s waist. “Which one’s your bedroom again?” Erwin’s words come out as a whisper against Levi’s lips. They kiss again, and Erwin pulls Levi even closer, their chests pressing together. He slides his arms down and heaves both him and Levi up in one movement.

Levi’s legs wrap around Erwin’s waist, clinging to him like his life depends on it. “First door on the left down the corridor, make it quick.”

--

They have their first kind-of-but-really-not date on the following Friday.

It starts with Isabel harassing Levi from the second he gets home from work about how they “absolutely must go out tonight!” As much as he hates to admit it, Levi has never really been able to say no to her – and she knows it, too. That’s why there are photos of them all over the house, and a cat called Croissant.

Levi plays along and protests weakly for all of two minutes before giving in; she really does have him wrapped around her little finger. He feigns annoyance as he trudges to the bathroom to shower, just for the drama of it all. Truth is, they haven’t really had a night out together for a while. She’s been working pretty hard recently, and she deserves to have a nice time.

Levi showers as quickly and as thoroughly as he can manage without Isabel knocking the door down. He barely gets his underwear on before she’s barging into his bedroom and insisting that he dress up, immediately digging through his wardrobe to find him a shirt. She throws a dark blue button-down with white flowers to him – a shirt that she had gifted to him a few months ago after receiving her first paycheque. Levi isn’t really a flowers person at all, but it’s his favourite shirt. He’s allowed to be a sentimental bitch every once and a while.

Isabel pretty much forces him into a pair of inappropriately tight dress pants and pats him sweetly on the cheek. “So handsome!”

He shrugs her off of him, his cheeks growing warm. “Yeah yeah, get ready, and let’s fuckin’ go.”

She orders them both an Uber into the city – with one stop on the way to pick Farlan up – and walks them so quickly to the bar that she’s practically running. They end up in a fancy-looking underground cocktail lounge on the main street. It’s not quite dark out yet, and the clouds are grey and dense with rain. It had rained for most of the day already, but it didn’t seem like it would stop any time soon. Inside, there’s dim, warm lighting from the little chandeliers hanging from the ceiling, swing music playing on the speakers, and a lit fireplace. The whole nine yards.

They’re escorted to a small booth in the corner and given a couple of food and drink menus. Farlan and Levi go into a conversation about their respective days at work while Isabel immediately snatches up the menus and pours over them.

It’s been far too long since Levi and Farlan last caught up properly, but they fly back into comfortable conversation with ease. The three of them have a lot to talk about, especially after a couple of drinks each.

Levi gets up after a while to use the bathroom, slash buy the next round, slash flirt awkwardly with the stupidly cute bartender while he makes their drinks. When he walks back to their table, there are noticeably a couple more strawberries in the glasses than usual. He supposes that’s all he’ll get from his weird flirty banter, but he’s okay with that. He admires the professionality more than he cares for getting his number.

He barely sits back down and starts up the conversation again before Isabel gasps loudly, squirming in her seat. “Erwin’s here!” she squeaks, far too loudly, and pointing at the other side of the restaurant.

And yep. There he is. Of course, she invited him.

Levi hides behind his drink and watches as Erwin rushes over, all handsome and tall and button-up shirt tucked in with the sleeves rolled up and a stupid navy tie, and who even gave him the right to look that good?

“God, sorry I’m late,” Erwin says hurriedly. “We were late with closing, and then I got stuck in some traffic, and then I had to go home and change, and –”

Isabel cuts him off with a wave of her hand. “Don’t worry about it!” She stands up from her seat next to Levi and pats the now-vacant chair. “Sit! I’ll get you a drink – the espresso martinis here are so good.”

She runs off to the bar before Erwin can get another word in, let alone protest to her spending money on him.

There’s a long beat of weird, awkward silence before Farlan sticks his hand out, switching from awkward to his usual friendly self in a split second. “You’re Erwin, then,” he remarks.

Erwin shakes Farlan’s hand. “And you must be Farlan,” he counters. “I’ve heard a lot about you from Isabel.”

“Likewise,” Farlan responds, not without taking a not-so-subtle glance at Levi and raising his eyebrows suggestively. It takes every bit of strength in Levi’s being not to throw his drink straight at him. Instead, he just chews on his flimsy paper straw and grunts in acknowledgement.

“I think you just might be Isabel’s new favourite person,” Farlan continues. “She’s already completely smitten.”

Right on cue, Isabel gently places two espresso martinis down onto the table, before sitting down heavily herself next to Farlan. “If you and Levi split up, I’m totally swooping in and making you my housewife,” she jokes. “I do love some good home cooking.”

Erwin laughs nervously and sips his drink. “Well, I mean… There isn’t really anything to split up,” he adds in, glancing warily at Levi. “So… I suppose I could be your housewife whenever, then.”

All Levi can do is stare down into his drink and fidget with his hands. It is true that they aren’t actually together, but there’s something about the way Erwin said it, just like that - and he sounded so sure about it. For some reason, it hurt.

Levi tries so hard not to wear his emotions on his sleeve. Everyone who’s known him for more than a minute knows that he’d rather shove his head into a spider web than show his emotions, but that hit him differently for some reason. Perhaps it’s just the fact that he was always under the impression that there was something to split up – they’ve been seeing each other regularly for a while – longer than anyone has ever wanted to be around Levi for, other than Isabel and Farlan. Does Erwin actually think that way, or is he saying it because he thinks that’s what Levi thinks?

The thought of that, and coupled with the fact that Isabel didn’t even mention that he was coming, sends his brain into overload. He listens to Isabel and Farlan continue to talk at Erwin, until the staticky feeling in his brain starts to become too much and he downs the rest of his drink in one go. “Excuse me,” he says, getting up on wobbly legs and high tailing it to the bathroom as fast as he can.

He washes his hands once. And again. And then once more, for his own peace of mind.

Levi sighs and stares at himself in the mirror – at his tired, sunken-in eyes; the dryness of his lips and the paleness of his skin; his messy, dark hair. Every part of his brain is screaming at him. That he’s not good enough for Erwin; that he’s just going to leave him at the first chance he gets. It shouldn’t matter, it doesn’t matter, just let it play out. His throat is dry, but he swallows down his anxiety and turns the tap on again, frantically dispensing soap onto his hand.

Two men enter the bathroom, chatting obnoxiously loudly with each other, and Levi uses it as an opportunity to escape back to their table. Nobody says anything, thank God¸ but Isabel slowly pushes a pink cocktail in a jar towards him. She gives him her best puppy-dog eyes, and he forgives her instantly. Of course he does.

His heartbeat thumps loudly in his ears as he sits down next to Erwin. He’s good at acting natural, so he warily hooks his foot around Erwin’s calf and puts a hand down on his thigh. He gets a warm smile in return, and Erwin leans in closer.

“So… Isabel didn’t mention that I was coming, then,” Erwin starts, quietly.

“No, she didn’t.”

“She said that she’s sorry for making you uncomfortable,” he offers.

Levi sighs. “Yeah, I know she is. She just got a bit carried away.”

Erwin raises an eyebrow at him. “There’s not much she can’t get away with with you, huh?” He sounds surprised, as if he hasn’t been in the same room as both of them at once. It’s laughably obvious how lenient Levi is with Isabel. She could come home with a whole litter of kittens, and he’d let her keep all of them if it would make her happy.

Of course, he wouldn’t actually tell her that, because she’d probably come home with a box full of cats the next day. But the sentiment is still there.

Levi shrugs passively. “She’s like a little sister to me,” he explains. “It’d be very un-big-brotherly of me to not let her get away with everything.”

That seems to make Erwin smile. “That’s really sweet.”

They sip their drinks together, in a silence that’s comfortable but still so painfully awkward.

Across the table, Isabel and Farlan are arguing over a basket of sweet potato fries – Farlan keeps stealing all of the crispy ones before Isabel can even look at them, how dare he. They’re both laughing about it, but Levi really wouldn’t be surprised if Isabel jumped over the table and started clawing at him.

Levi stays mostly quiet for the next hour or so, only chiming in on conversation every now and then. He just sits and sips on cocktail after cocktail, sinking into a fuzzy haze. By the time everyone starts to get ready to leave, his cheeks are numb, and it takes him a good few seconds to stand up on his shaky legs.

“We should head home before I spend all of my money,” Isabel sighs, pulling her coat over her shoulders.

Erwin slowly stands up and looks around at them, unsure what to do with himself. Isabel hooks her arm around Erwin’s and pulls herself close to his side.

“Come back to ours,” she says, looking up at him. “I have some wine left, and you can stay the night.” She turns to Levi. God, she knows he can’t resist her stupid puppy-dog eyes. “Right?”

Levi shrugs, acting as nonchalant as he can. “Sounds good.”

Erwin smiles, “Sounds good to me, too.”

--

It’s not long until Isabel is wine-drunk and singing and swaying around the kitchen with Croissant huddled securely to her chest, whilst Levi, Erwin, and Farlan play Uno at the table. It’s definitely not Levi’s game of choice – not by a long shot. He’s unnecessarily competitive and impatient, and everyone knows that when you mix that with Uno, friendships get destroyed and someone ends up crying. He sits there, grumpy as ever and holding about fifteen cards, and glares at Farlan from across the table. He somehow managed to get all of the pick up four and reversal cards, completely fucking Levi over, because he’s a fucking coward who doesn’t even dare target the new guy.

“Fucking hell Is, it’s your turn,” Levi groans, picking up her hand and throwing it at her weakly. The cards flutter down around her and land softly at her feet.

“Noooo, no cards. Time to dance with the baby.” The baby, who is actually a four-year-old adult cat, seems content to just sit in her arms and be swayed.

Erwin looks on with amusement. It’s the first time since they got home that Croissant hasn’t stuck to Erwin like glue. (Although, she did get a bit upset about being stolen from her comfortable perch on his lap.)

“My turn, then!” Farlan says. He’s far too excited, Levi notices. And… yep, another pick up two card. Yet again, Levi doesn’t have anything to refute it with. He grumbles in annoyance as he picks up another two. He’s so getting his ass beaten later.

Next to him, Erwin takes his turn, happily exclaiming, “Uno!” as he sets down a yellow reversal card.

Levi throws his card onto the pile unceremoniously, and then Farlan takes his turn, and ultimately, Erwin is declared the winner.

“Thank fuck that’s over,” Levi hisses, dropping the rest of his cards onto the table. “I forgot that you’re an asshole.”

Farlan laughs happily. “Not my fault you’re bad at Uno.”

“I will punch you, and you know I will,” Levi challenges, standing up. It’s all just casual banter, and they both know that he probably wouldn’t punch Farlan. (Probably.)

“Let’s go, then!” Farlan jumps to his feet, puffing out his chest comically. He moves into an open space and beckons at Levi, planting his feet down firmly on the ground and bracing himself.

Erwin looks alarmed, but he doesn’t say anything. He just watches quietly as Levi lets out a (reasonably volumed) war cry and immediately pounces on Farlan like a cat. Their actual cat squirms out of Isabel’s arms and bolts off out of the kitchen. They wrestle with each other, and it’s like they’re kids again. Except much less messy, and more… two men who are getting way too old for wrestling.

Levi manages to pin Farlan down, jamming his hands under his shirt and wriggling them against his sides. He tickles Farlan until he’s a mess of laughter and surprisingly high-pitched noises, thrashing around and begging him to stop.

“It’s like watching two puppies fight,” Erwin remarks amusedly. He steps back cautiously when Levi’s head whips around to look at him.

“You wanna go too, big boy?”

Erwin raises an eyebrow at him. “You really think you could take me down?” he challenges. He thinks for a second before adding a wary sounding, “Short stuff?”

Isabel and Farlan gasp dramatically. “You didn’t,” Isabel laughed.

Levi gets up rather ungracefully and starts towards Erwin, flipping his hair out of his face and cracking his knuckles. Erwin doesn’t seem to be too worried by his “boy on the streets” intimidation tactic. He seems confident that Levi won’t actually hurt him or anything, but they both know that Levi is stronger than he looks.

Levi is also a lot quicker than he looks, too, and he manages to dodge around Erwin and jump up onto his back. He uses all of his weight to clumsily pull Erwin down onto the ground, rolling him over onto his back and throwing a leg over his body to straddle him. Isabel cheers for him enthusiastically. Even though Erwin’s tipsy state makes it a lot easier to take him down, he still huffs in triumph at his win.

“I wasn’t expecting you to actually be able to do it,” Erwin observes. He subtly places a hand on Levi’s thigh, stroking it gently. “I stand corrected.”

Levi grumbles under his breath nervously, his face warm and flushed. He moves to stand up and Erwin strikes, wrapping his arms around Levi and flipping him over onto the ground. The impact knocks the wind out of Levi’s lungs a little bit, and he gasps for breath.

“You dirty bitch,” Levi hisses, immediately struggling to regain control. Erwin just laughs and sits down heavily on his thighs, restricting his movement.

Erwin shrugs, grabbing Levi’s hands and pinning them down by his head. “You don’t win by playing nice and following rules.”

Levi sticks up his nose at Erwin, giving him his best annoyed face.

All he gets in return is a big grin as Erwin leans down, pressing a kiss on the tip of his nose. “For such an angry little man, you sure are cute,” he points out.

From the kitchen, Farlan fakes gagging sounds. “I’m going to throw up, stop it.” Isabel giggles next to him.

Just to be rude, Erwin leans down and kisses Levi properly, laughing against his mouth. And what kind of person would Levi be if he didn’t kiss him back?

--

It happens slowly, but eventually, Erwin ends up spending most of his time at Levi and Isabel’s place. It started as one or two times a week, but then Levi suggests that it could be nice if Erwin spent a weekend there. After that, his toothbrush starts making an appearance in the bathroom, and Levi finds at least three pairs of his underwear in his wardrobe. They go to work at the same time, Levi comes home, and then he and Croissant just sit and wait for Erwin to come back a couple of hours. Sometimes it feels like years, but he doesn’t think too far into that.

Levi isn’t entirely sure what it is that keeps Erwin coming back. It could be that he gets along with Isabel really well. Both her and Croissant seem to follow him around wherever he goes. He comes home one day to all three of them asleep on the couch, some cheesy TV show playing in the background. He tries not to feel too jealous about their bond, because he and Erwin do still spend plenty of time alone together. But Levi just seems to struggle to connect with people in the same way that Isabel has always been able to, and he’s always been uncomfortably insecure about that.

Awkward lapses in conversation slowly turn into comfortable silences, though, and slowly but surely, it gets easier.

It’s hard for Levi to believe that someone like Erwin could genuinely like him, sometimes. He wouldn’t exactly brand himself as someone who’s easy to tolerate, never mind actually like. But apparently Erwin, who is relentlessly pleasant to be around and far easier to get along with than Levi is himself, really, actually, genuinely likes him.

Levi brushes his teeth and stares at Erwin’s razor, sitting on the side of the sink. It’s just sitting there, like it pays rent or something. And it should annoy him, but it doesn’t. Erwin is very slowly invading his home, his social life, his thoughts. Surprisingly, he’s okay with it. What started out as a hook-up and then really good casual sex is now… a friendship, he guesses. The sex is still good too, which is a bonus.

He sighs and puts his toothbrush back in its holder. What is he turning into?

--

They don’t see each other for about two weeks, making sure to text every now and then and communicate through Isabel. Even Levi will admit that it gets a little sad around the house without Erwin around. Croissant goes all around the house trying to find him, and Levi feels bad enough for her that he lets her sleep in his bed for a couple of nights.

Levi comes home on Thursday night from what is turning out to be his longest and most exhausting week in a long time. He fully intends on just lying on the kitchen floor with his cat for the next few hours and disintegrating into a pile of sand. He groans, hanging his work bag up on the hook by the front door, and heads towards the kitchen. The smell of sautéing onions gets stronger the closer he gets, accompanied by some faint pop song on the radio. “God, Isabel, I swear,” he starts, “if another one of the assholes I work with tests me, I’m going to start punching.”

He rounds the corner into the kitchen, only to be met by broad shoulders and blond hair. He blinks at Erwin, standing at the stove with Levi’s stupid old apron on. It’s pink, with big black letters on that front that invite you to kiss the cook. It’s also about two sizes too small on Erwin, and Levi has to work hard to suppress his laughter. “My, Isabel, you sure do look different today, did you cut your hair?”

“Ha ha, very funny,” Erwin replies, turning back to the stove. “She let me in and went out for the night.”

“Right,” Levi says, suspicious. He approaches the kitchen island cautiously. Croissant is sitting on one of the stools, flicking her fluffy tail and watching Erwin intently. He sits on the stool next to her and reaches over to pet her head.

“I mean,” Erwin continues, pushing the contents of the pan around slowly, “she told me you were having a bad week and invited me over. Y’know, to help make you feel better.”

While he has never met them, Levi knows that Erwin has friends of his own. Which, as Levi understands it, loosely translates to having something better to do with his time. He doesn’t say that, though, because the last time he brought it up, Erwin just looked really sad and said, “What could be better than this?” Levi felt guilty for a whole week after that.

“I have this whole thing planned for tonight, so you can just go sit down and relax,” Erwin explains, reaching over to turn the kettle on. “I’ll bring a cup of tea out for you.”

Levi starts to protest, but Erwin gives him a look of pure don’t even try that’s somehow scary enough to scare Levi, of all people, into just shutting up and following instructions.

He heads into the living room, taking off his blazer on the way and folding it up neatly, placing it carefully on one of the armchairs. He throws himself down onto the couch, clicking the on button on the TV remote. He doesn’t really indulge himself on TV at all, but flips the channel until he lands on the opening song of this soap opera that he and Isabel started watching ages ago. She slowly lost interest and stopped watching, but Levi still catches up on it every now and then.

Erwin comes in and sets a mug down on the coffee table, taking care to put a coaster down first. Levi watches as he meticulously shifts the coaster around until it’s in the exact spot (more or less) that Levi puts it every time he uses it. He softly kisses Levi on the forehead on his way out, having said nothing about his evening TV viewing choices – Levi sighs in relief at that.

Levi takes a big gulp of his tea and sits back. He swims in and out of consciousness for a little bit, only half paying attention to his show. It’s been such a long and shitty week that he can’t even watch his favourite soap opera for longer than ten minutes without just wanting to fall asleep immediately.

The next thing he knows, Erwin is standing over Levi and gently shaking his shoulder. “Dinner’s ready,” he says softly when Levi opens his eyes.

Levi groans and crawls off of the couch, still half asleep. His soap’s credits sequence is playing on the TV, so at least he hasn’t been asleep for too long. He follows Erwin to the dining room, yawning obnoxiously loudly as he trails slowly behind him. “Thanks for making dinner,” he mumbles. “I’m so exhausted, I probably would’ve forgotten to eat again.”

Erwin laughs quietly. “Yeah, Isabel mentioned that you haven’t been eating properly.”

“Figures,” Levi sighs, sitting down at the table. There’s a big bowl of spaghetti bolognese (with real meat) in front of him, and a big loaf of garlic bread in the middle of the table. “Oh God,” he moans, reaching straight for the end piece of the loaf. “I am so in love.”

He doesn’t even try to back-peddle on that – he just immediately blocks it out of his memories and shoves the entire slice of garlic bread into his mouth at once. Thankfully, Erwin just sits down and doesn’t mention it at all, looking noticeably redder in the face.

Levi scarfs down his dinner in record time, downing an entire glass of water afterwards. “You’re too good at this,” he sighs. “Maybe you should be our live-in chef.”

“I’m sure Isabel will be very happy to hear that,” Erwin replies. “And Croissant, of course. She was absolutely screaming at me when I got here.”

“Stupid fucking cat.” Levi says it with all of the love he can muster. After all, they’re not that dissimilar when it comes to Erwin these days – always wanting to spend time with each other. He almost rolls his eyes at himself – he’s turned into such a fucking sap, it almost makes him sick.

They sit there for a little longer while Erwin finishes his own dinner, keeping up quiet casual conversation. Levi slowly eats away at the rest of the garlic bread, despite having eaten way too much and way too quickly. The bread is just so good, though, that he can’t resist.

Erwin takes their plates to the kitchen and gets to tidying up. Levi rests his chin in his hands and watches him work. He cleans up thoroughly and efficiently, and fuck, Levi should not be as turned on by that as he is – and yet…

Before he fully realises he’s doing it, Levi gets up from his seat and approaches Erwin, turning him around and kissing him straight on the lips. Between the tea, dinner, cleaning up afterwards, and just being here in general – Levi just can’t resist. He has always been independent, never relying on anyone, but letting Erwin look after him for just one night is just so refreshing.

Levi pulls back slowly and watches as Erwin stands there with his eyes still closed and his lips still parted and looking so beautiful; and before he can stop it, a little voice in his mind says, “Fuck, I’m in love with you.”

“Oh,” he says, out loud. It’s the first time he’s ever allowed himself to think about it. It slipped out, really – he’s been in denial about it for months now, shoving any thought even beginning with L deep into a little locked box in his mind.

Erwin opens his eyes and raises an eyebrow. He replies with a quiet, “Oh?” in return.

Levi laughs nervously, pulling away and backing the fuck up and out of Erwin’s general vicinity as fast as he can. He’s suddenly sweating buckets, and he can feel it sliding down his back – taunting him. “Oh!” he repeats. “Would you just look at the time.” He pulls his sleeve up to reveal his watch-less wrist. “I should go take a shower.”

Erwin looks conflicted for a second, cocking his head to the side like a confused dog, but he suddenly perks up and reaches out to grab Levi’s arm before he can run off to the bathroom. Any reaction to Levi’s sudden weirdness is thrown out the window as a shy smile spreads across his face. “Wait here a minute. I was going to draw you a bath as a nice surprise.” He pauses. “Well, I suppose it’s not much of a surprise now, but…”

“Oh,” Levi says again. He cringes at his overuse of the word and digs his nails into his palm, cursing this ridiculous gay panic. “That sounds good.”

Erwin happily trots off towards the bathroom, leaving Levi to stand around awkwardly in the kitchen. It’s almost too good. Dinner and a bath wouldn’t exactly be the most luxurious thing in the world in a lot of people’s eyes, but the most that Levi has ever gotten in terms of – he guesses – romantic gestures, is a one-night stand ordering food to his house after sex.

Erwin is making things very difficult for him, indeed.

While he’s in the kitchen, Levi busies himself with feeding Croissant for the night. The spoilt little cat meows loudly at his feet as he’s tipping a tin of Fancy Feast onto her plate. He puts the plate down for her and she immediately goes for it, scarfing the entire thing down in record time. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think she was being starved to death.

Levi squats down next to Croissant and strokes her back while she eats. It must be nice to be a cat, he thinks. Sitting around all day, not having to go to work or file taxes. Or deal with the feelings that you’ve been repressing for your friend-with-benefits, that have now reared their ugly little head despite how far you try to shove them down.

Not that Levi is bitter about it or anything.

Erwin calls out to him from the bathroom, and Levi gives Croissant one final scratch under the chin before he heads off to the bathroom.

He’s not sure what he was expecting, but it wasn’t a bathroom filled to the brim with candles, a portable speaker playing quiet classical music, and a bath full of bubbles. Erwin is sitting down on the edge of the toilet lid, looking nervous as all hell.

It’s romantic, that’s for sure.

And all Levi can do is just start laughing. To make it worse, the sad, dejected look on Erwin’s face just makes him laugh even more. “Oh, God- Erwin, no, don’t worry,” he huffs. “This is really lovely, I swear.”

He’s not sure he’s ever referred to anything as lovely before in his life, but he’s being truthful. He forces his face back into a neutral expression and crosses over to the other side of the bedroom in a couple of strides, taking Erwin’s face in his hands and kissing him. “Really. Thank you.”

Levi starts to undress himself, placing his folded clothes in a neat, ordered pile on the counter by the sink. He can feel Erwin’s eyes burning into him as he takes off his underwear, and then even hotter still as he steps carefully into the bathtub and sinks down into the water. He sighs, and closes his eyes, and suddenly all of the stupid shit from the past week melts away in a mix of green tea scented bubble bath and vanilla candles. Fuck, it feels good.

“Are you going to join me or just sit there and stare at me like a creep for an hour?” Levi asks, rolling his head to face Erwin.

Erwin is hardly able to hold his excitement as he gets to his feet, taking his clothes off in record time. Levi sits forwards so that Erwin can slip into the tub behind him. The tub is pretty big, but Erwin still has to bend his knees to be able to sit in it. It’s still comfortable though, and Levi lets Erwin wrap his arms around his waist and pull him back against his chest.

With Erwin’s lips pressing little kisses against his cheeks and his fingers stroking little circles on his ribs – this may be the most relaxed he’s ever been.

--

After they get out of the bath and dry off, Erwin leads Levi to the bedroom. As if dinner and a bath weren’t enough, he gets Levi to lie naked and face-down on the bed for a massage. Erwin puts down a towel, brings a couple of candles in from the bathroom and sits, also naked, on the back of Levi’s knees.

The massage oil is cold as it drips onto his back, but it smells like coconut and it soon warms up when Erwin’s large hands glide up from the base of his spine to his shoulders. His entire body feels like it’s melting into the sheets as Erwin works out some of the most egregious knots in his shoulders and neck.

Levi sighs contentedly. “You better not have anything else planned. This is already so much.”

“This is the last thing,” Erwin chuckles. He leans over Levi’s body, pressing his chest against his back and kissing the back of his neck, and moving a short distance down his spine. “I promise.”

All Levi can do whilst Erwin is massaging his entire body is just lie there and moan quietly. He’s not really the type of guy to get massages, so he doesn’t have anything to compare it to, but Erwin does a damn good job at it. It’s hard for him to believe that anyone could do any better – especially when Erwin lightly presses his fingers between the tops of Levi’s thighs, sliding them up and cupping his buttocks firmly in his hands. From that point on, Levi is almost painfully hard.

He starts to squirm in his spot – not out of discomfort or anything, but pure anticipation. It’s obviously turning out to be one of those sorts of massages; especially with Erwin’s erection pressing firmly between his thighs. Levi isn’t exactly complaining about it, but Erwin sure is taking his sweet time to move onto anything further.

“Okay,” Erwin mumbles, sitting up on his knees a little bit. “Turn around.”

Levi flips himself over, raising his arms up to cover his eyes. Erwin applies more oil onto his hands and Levi can’t help but sigh as his hands move up his stomach and press into his chest. His gentle fingers circle Levi’s nipples, and God, he’s never felt so sensitive there in his life. He gasps loudly and arches his back when Erwin finally brushes the pads of his thumbs over them.

“Fuck, fuck,” Levi hisses, squeezing his eyes shut. His cock is throbbing and leaking against his stomach. Thankfully, Erwin decides not to tease him too much this time and goes straight into slowly moving his palm up the shaft of Levi’s cock before loosely wrapping his hand around it. He uses his other hand to nudge Levi’s legs apart and rub against his inner thighs, eventually sliding down between his cheeks to caress his perineum. It almost feels like too much stimulation, but in a good way. Honestly, he feels a little cheated that none of the hand jobs he’s ever received have felt like this.

Erwin’s hands speed up, his fingers inching further down to press and rub up against his entrance. Levi draws in a sharp breath when his middle finger finally penetrates him. He doesn’t take his time in sliding his finger further in, eliciting a loud moan from Levi when he crooks his finger up into his prostate.

He seems to be getting a lot of satisfaction in the reactions he’s getting from Levi, if the soft smile on his face is anything to go by. “How are you feeling?” he asks, tightening his grip a little bit.

Levi sighs, “Good, good,” and lifts his legs up a little bit for easier access. Erwin takes it as an opportunity to add in another finger, pressing a firm kiss onto Levi’s knee. His fingers press up against Levi’s prostate at the same moment his other thumb rubs against his frenulum, and Levi’s whole body twitches almost violently. Erwin raises a thick eyebrow at that, letting out a soft, “Oh?”

Having found the sweet spot, he sticks to stroking those two places in particular, and the more he strokes, the more vocal Levi gets. It’s the loudest he’s ever been during sex – which isn’t that much of a challenge to beat, since he was usually strangely quiet. But the noises he’s making are downright pathetic. Even so, coupled with the fact that he’s legitimately panting and his body keeps twitching involuntarily, he can’t bring himself to feel too embarrassed about his body’s reaction to the stimulation.

His orgasm builds up in the pits of his stomach, tingling up his spine, and Erwin just keeps speeding up little by little. Luckily for Levi, it doesn’t take too long for his entire body to explode with pleasure – and explode it does. Levi comes, and his whole body shakes with it, and it just keeps going. His pathetic little moans evolve into frantic crying – so bad that he has to shove his face into the sheets to muffle most of it. “Fuck, fuck fuck fuck, fuck,” Levi hisses, scrunching his eyes shut and practically crying into the sheets. “Fuck, I love you, Jesus fuck.”

Tears roll down his cheeks as his body starts to calm down a little bit, and he manages to wipe them away with the back of his hand. Erwin doesn’t say anything – he just strokes Levi’s hair and leans in to press little kisses on his forehead.

They lie there for a few moments, Erwin whispering praise in Levi’s ear as he tries to calm down and stop the physical aftershocks of his orgasm. It takes him a good ten minutes for his body to finally settle and stop feeling like it’s floating. He looks up at Erwin, and then it clicks. Oh no.

“That was… um,” Levi starts. He digs his fingernails into the palms of his hands and cringes internally. Erwin is looking back at him with wide eyes. There’s no way he missed it. Change the subject as quickly as you can. “I think you’ve killed me.”

“Is that good or bad?” Erwin asks, giving Levi a pitiful little smile.

“Good,” Levi confirms. “I totally blacked out for a minute there. Like… I almost have no idea what happened.”

Erwin looks a little confused, but Levi just chooses to ignore it and rolls away. He sits up, and immediately his vision floods with static. He groans and waits a few moments before he crawls off of the bed. His legs nearly give way when he stands up, but he manages to stay on his feet and pull on his underwear without falling over. “I’m going to shower this oil off of me.”

“Good idea.”

“Are you staying the night…?” Levi asks warily, completely unsure of whether he wanted him to or not.

“I’d like to stay,” Erwin confirms.

“Okay.” Levi stands there awkwardly for a beat too long, before basically sprinting down the hall and into the bathroom. He closes the door behind him a little bit too hard and leans his back against the door, sliding his hands over his face.

Fuck.

--

“You did what?!”

Levi just sits there, looking down at his hands in shame. Needless to say, Isabel didn’t take the news of Levi accidentally telling Erwin he loved him and then completely back-pedalling – y’know, like a coward – very well. She leans forwards and smackshim on the head. “Ouch, you bitch!” Levi yelps, grabbing his head. “What was I supposed to do?!”

“Oh, gosh, I don’t know, maybe just fucking tell him how you feel?” Isabel exclaims.

“I can’t do that.”

“Why not?” Isabel counters. “You’re both obviously crazy for each other. Are you that stupid?”

All Levi can do is shrug. While it is true that he is a bit crazy about Erwin, he’s not really sure if he loves him. It’s not like he has anything else to compare to – he’s never been in a relationship or even really liked anyone before, so how should he know whether or not he’s in love with Erwin? They’ve been seeing each other for a while – longer than Levi has ever seen anyone by a longshot – and Levi cares about him just as much as he cares about Isabel and Farlan, but that doesn’t necessarily have to mean that he’s in love.

And what if Erwin doesn’t feel the same way about him? When Levi said that he loved him, Erwin didn’t say anything back. Granted, the entire situation was awkward and weird, but… He didn’t say anything about it then, and he hasn’t said anything about it since.

Isabel sighs, throwing her head down into her hands. “Why are you like this?” she groans, and Levi suddenly feels like a child who’s being lectured by his teacher. She lifts her head. “Do you remember when I was dating Sophie? And for months she was the only thing I talked or thought about. Like, it was so bad that you started spraying me with water every time I even said her name.”

“Yeah?”

“You sit around waiting for him to message, and if he’s not here you mope around the house all day until he asks if he can come over.”

“I don’t mope,” he argues.

…

Okay, maybe he does mope a little.

Isabel flaps her hand in his direction. “Whatever. I’m basically saying that you’re acting exactly like I used to, and it’s so obvious.” She sighs and leans forwards towards him. “Look. It’s okay if you don’t feel ready to tell him. If you’re too scared to acknowledge that you love him, or if you don’t think you do just yet, you don’t have to do anything at all.”

For the first time in a longtime, Levi doesn’t know what to do.

Maybe he is falling in love, but where does he go from there? If Erwin tells him that he loves him, do they start calling each other boyfriends? The idea of calling someone his boyfriend at thirty fucking years old just feels so weird to him – hell, it would’ve felt weird to him as a kid. And if Erwin doesn’t feel the same way and doesn’t want to see him anymore, what will he do then? He can’t even begin to imagine his life without Erwin in it anymore.

The idea of losing Erwin makes him feel sick.

Levi groans and throws his head back. “God fucking damn it,” he sighs. He brings his hands up to his face and digs his fingers into his eyelids. “I’m going to have to tell him for real, aren’t I?”

Chuckling, Isabel leans over to pat Levi’s knee. “Good luck.”

--

He doesn’t have anything close to a coherent plan in mind, but Levi invites Erwin over on the following Saturday.

He arrives at Levi’s house at noon with a paper bag full of different kinds of doughnuts and a cappuccino for Levi, who drinks it so fast that it burns his throat on the way down. The caffeine calms him down a little bit, but his hands are still shaking as Erwin says hello to Croissant, shouts his greeting to Isabel in her room, and throws himself down onto the couch.

He needs to say something.

Despite Levi’s jittery nerves, Erwin seems to be acting exactly the same as he always does. He smiles up at Levi and pats his knees, beckoning him to come and sit down. Levi complies, slowly slinking over to climb into Erwin’s lap. He pulls Levi down, kissing him on the mouth and sliding a hand up the back of his shirt. He idly strokes Levi’s back, fingers skimming over the ridges of his spine and causing Levi to melt even further into Erwin’s embrace.

Levi sighs happily, his hands immediately finding their place in Erwin’s hair and pushing his fingers through to separate the shitty hair-wax that he insists on using.

He really needs to say something. How hard does it have to be to tell someone that you love them, when you’ve already said it before?

But Erwin is warm, despite how cold it is outside, and Levi can feel himself finally calming down for the first time all day. Why does he even have to bring it up? It would be so much easier to just wait until Erwin brings it up himself. Or until he gets sick of him, Levi supposes – which would probably be so much worse, now that he thinks about it.

Winter is finally creeping up, and the more time he spends with Erwin, the more he begins to dread the idea of spending the season alone. He doesn’t peg himself for a particularly traditional person, nor a romantic, but spending the holiday season without him there would just feel wrong. Seeing people in their happy couples never really bothered Levi too much in the past, but there was always the tiniest feeling inside of his chest that felt a little too much like loneliness. Not to mention that they’ve all already gotten so used to Erwin being around, and Levi is in way too deep.

Erwin eases up, nudging his lips against Levi’s gently and slipping his hand down to his ass. He hums contentedly as Erwin’s long fingers dig firmly into his skin, acting as a way to pull him closer. His lips slowly find their way down Levi’s neck, and Erwin gently nudges his Adam’s apple with his tongue, eventually attaching onto his neck and sucking and licking its way down to his collarbone. There’s a sharp curl of pleasure deep within Levi’s core, and he can’t help the startled hiccup that forces its way out of his mouth.

“Fuuuck, alright.” Levi pulls back from Erwin suddenly and scrambles to climb off of his lap.

Erwin’s eyebrows shoot up and he sits up, carefully folding his hands in his lap. “What’s wrong?”

“God, um…” Levi shifts nervously. He wipes his sweaty palms on his jeans, sinking his teeth into the inside of his bottom lip. “You know, the other night. When I said… That I. Love you. Or whatever.”

Erwin blinks slowly at him. “I… didn’t think you’d want me to bring it up.”

“Yeah, well…” Levi digs his fingernails into his thigh and looks away. “I guess I’m bringing it up.”

“Okay,” Erwin says slowly. “You’re going to say that you didn’t mean it, right? Like, you just said it in the moment.” He sounds pretty sure of himself, Levi notices. He wonders if Erwin went through it in his head over and over, trying to convince himself that he didn’t mean it – just like Levi did.

Levi shrugs. “I did say it in the moment,” he confirms. He hazards a glance at Erwin for a second, and looks into his eyes, and sees just how startled he seems. There really isn’t any way he can’t tell him now, and the worst Erwin can do is reject him. It will only mean years of crippling embarrassment and loneliness for Levi, but he’s sure he’s been through worse in his life.

He takes a deep breath and turns around so that he isn’t facing Erwin anymore. Here goes. “The thing is,” he starts, slowly, “I think I do. Love you.”

There it is.

He did it, he did it, he did it.

Levi lets go of the huge sigh that’s been weighing him down all day. He’s still absolutely shitting himself, but it feels great to finally get it off of his chest. He has never laid his heart out to anyone like this before. He takes a couple of moments to breathe and slowly turns around to look at Erwin again. And… Erwin just staring at him with his mouth open was not exactly the reaction he thought he would get.

“I was–” Erwin’s voice cracks, and he clears his throat “…not expecting that.”

Levi is suddenly hit by a rush of oh fuck, oh God, oh no, and slowly pulls further back. He’s not sure exactly what he was expecting himself – total and complete rejection, maybe, but not… awkward, stunned silence. He can’t even run away, because it’s his house. Fuck, he knew he should’ve done it at Erwin’s place.

Still, he considers bolting anyway because he doesn’t think there is anything he has ever hated more than telling someone that he loves them for the first time and just getting stared at.

He’s just about to stand up and make his escape, but Erwin leans forwards and places a hand gently onto his thigh. “Tell me again.”

Levi clears his throat, and suddenly he’s completely nervous all over again. “I think I’m in love with you,” he mumbles. For good measure, he tentatively adds, “Erwin.”

Erwin suddenly leans in closer, pressing a hard kiss onto Levi’s mouth and sliding a hand up into his hair. He wraps an arm around Levi’s waist and pulls him in closer until their chests are pressed up against each other. He pulls back slowly, and he’s smiling, and he says, “I think I’m in love with you, too,” and Levi feels the weight lift off of his shoulders.

“You kept me waiting a little too long for that, y’know?” Levi says, leaning back. “I thought you were about to get up and leave.”

“I’m sorry.” Erwin chuckles, and kisses him again. “I would never do that to you, I promise.”

“That’s okay,” Levi says, just about melting. He pulls Erwin on top of him and kisses the hell out of him.

--

In all of the years that Levi has known Isabel, there has never been anything that has stopped her from going all out for Christmas, and this year is no different. She buys her presents months in advance, and absolutely insists on decorating immediately after Halloween.

Levi hates it. He hates Christmas, and he hates decorating, but it’s not like he could stop her. That would just be wrong.

Most of all, he hates the Christmas tree. He hates how the plastic leaves scratch his hands, and how difficult it is to screw it into the shitty metal stand, and he can’t stand the fact that Isabel and Farlan seemingly have no eye for decoration. They just throw ornaments and tinsel of all colours onto the tree and call it a day. It’s genuinely painful, and Isabel is lucky that he loves her so much. And if he subtly fixes her decoration monstrosities every now and then, no one has to know.

Levi watches in horror as Isabel haphazardly throws green tinsel onto the tree, completely covering up at least five of the baubles Levi had hung himself. She smirks sideways at Levi, and he concludes that there’s no way she isn’t doing it on purpose.

Beside him, Erwin chuckles quietly to himself and leans over to wrap an arm around Levi’s shoulders. “I can’t believe you’re just letting her do this,” he notes. “You must be more whipped than I thought.”

“He is!” Farlan says happily, tossing another string of tinsel at the tree. It lands almost directly on top of another string, and they just leave it there. Because they’re monsters.

Levi grumbles, crossing his arms. “She does it on purpose because she knows I can’t say anything about it,” he explains. He has to try extra hard not to cringe in disgust. “Christmas is the only time of the year where I’m not allowed to complain.”

Humming in what Levi chooses to believe to be a sympathetic manner, Erwin pulls on Levi’s shoulders until his head is resting in his lap. He takes the opportunity to curl up and shield his eyes from the horror unfolding in front of him, and pretty much melts into the couch as Erwin runs his fingers through his hair.

“And there’s still two months of Christmas left!” Isabel exclaims, clapping her hands excitedly.

“Yay,” Levi responds, completely unenthusiastically.

As November rolls on into December, Erwin and Farlan start to spend nearly every day at the house. It starts with Farlan, who usually spends most of the holidays with them every year, and Levi supposes that Erwin just follows his lead. It makes sense, he supposes, since Erwin doesn’t really have family to spend time with during the holidays either.

He wouldn’t admit it, but Levi is the happiest that he’s ever felt now that Erwin is around every day. They slowly fall into new routines, and it definitely helps that Erwin has plenty of time to bake holiday-themed treats. Whilst they both have time off of work, it’s easy to slip into a comfortable state of sitting down in front of the TV, cooking, “family bonding night” with Isabel and Farlan, and making out all week.

Levi can’t remember ever being excited for Christmas, but he bought Erwin an expensive Damascus-patterned Santoku knife, and there are some nights where he genuinely can’t get to sleep from how excited he is to see the look on his face when he gives it to him – and sometimes, from how nervous he is at the thought that Erwinn won’t even like it.

On Christmas Eve, he waits no later than 12:03am to sit Erwin down in front of the fireplace and give him the meticulously wrapped giftbox that has been giving him so much anxiety lately. He watches with a full heart as Erwin takes his time to unwrap it, being extra careful not to tear the wrapping paper or crease the nice ribbon that Levi used. He takes the lid off of the fancy wooden box that the knife resides inside, taking his sweet time as though he knows exactly how much the anticipation is killing Levi.

“Oh wow,” is all Erwin says once he sets the lid down. He gently picks up the knife and turns it around in his hands, not even attempting to stifle the huge grin that crosses his face. “This is lovely, Levi. I’m almost a bit scared to use it, it’s so nice.”

Levi just shrugs. “It can just be for decoration.”

Erwin gently puts the knife away and leans forwards to land a hard kiss on Levi’s mouth, “Thank you so much. I love it.” He adds, “I love you,” and Levi can’t help but push him down onto the floor and crawl on top of him. The world outside is slowly filling up with white snow and holiday chill, and the crackling fireplace isn’t the only thing keeping them so warm on their first of many Christmases together.

[lukneetoonz]

Little Goddess Part II

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Summary: As a newer goddess you think back on how you got to where you are; in the throne room sitting next to your husband, the god of the dead.

Pairing: Hades!Aizawa x fem!reader, DadNyx!Izuku x fem!reader platonic, MomSelene!Uraraka x reader platonic.

Warnings: Shameless flirting, cussing, bakubae threatening people like usual, aizawa being hot, both aizawa and reader talking down on themselves kinda, mean ex.

Word Count: 2,545

A/N: 2nd chapter!! Hope you guys like it! If you didn’t catch on, y/n gifted aizawa the cat version of Cerberus! He didn’t have a guard before and now he does! Also I really hope the tags work this time round!

NO ARTWORK POSTED IS MY OWN AND IS FOUND ON PINTEREST

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You never thought a place so hated and talked down on could be so- beautiful…. The skyscrapers all painted with glass walls it seemed. Even if it was in constant darkness, the moon- your mother’s moon glittered across the river Styx and reflected off windows. Turning to look at your father you smiled in disbelief, how could some place that was described as eternal damnation, be so- sleek? So aesthetically pleasing to one's eyes? “Are We at the checkpoint, or-” Your father laughed at your obvious amazement

“You hurt me, did you really think that the place me and your mother work constantly at could be horrible?” Izuku chuckled at your pouty face “Well I’m sorry that Everyone always makes a big deal about how scary it is here!” You would cross your arms but you still held the cat in your arms. You both arrived in front of the tallest building and you gulped as you stood in front of it “What if the king hates me?” You hear a small chuckle beside you only to be met with golden eyes

“Lemme guess, you’re a new egg?” Nodding your head, you stared at the winged man in front of you but your father was quick to jump in front of you “Keigo! I see you’re working today… this is my daughter, Y/N.” Your father had a nice smile on his face but his eyes were staring keigo down who had a lazy smirk on his face, golden eyes trained on you “Well, aren’t you a gorgeous little thing” The gods words made your father scowl and you blush

“Keigo, she’s young.” The winged god merely snickered “Relax Izuku! I just like to ruffle your feathers sometimes!” He laughed, a smile on his face as you looked at them curiously “You must be who the mortals call Hermes?” You spoke out, the attention on you now and Keigo nodded “That’s correct chickadee, but you can call me Keigo, or Kei for short” He took your hand and kissed your knuckles, winking at you with a small smile as you blushed and nodded, your father staring in disapproval.

“As much as I’d like to catch up keigo, We have a meeting with Aizawa. Y/N is going to be doing some work for him, today is her first meeting with him.” This peaked the blonde's interest as he raised his eyebrow “Ah, well good luck chickadee. Don’t be a stranger.” He smiled with a nod before flying off, your eyes following his movements “Are all gods that nice?” Your question made your father sigh “Be careful around the men… sometimes they get- power blind.”

His tone made you confused, but it made you remember stories of Zeus, or Enji, many affairs with mortals and nymphs, Queen Rei never once able to do anything about it. Nodding, you just walked in and followed your father, taking in the smoothly functioning atmosphere.

*•*

“Why can’t you just do your job quietly and not bother me katsuki?” Aizawa leaned back in his chair from behind his desk and sighed “You’re the God of Death. Your job is to bring the souls here, so what’s the problem?” The monotone voice spoke almost annoyed as red eyes glared, the younger God moving as his grey feathers ruffled in anger. “Because that shitty mail man thinks he’s better than me since you hired him!” Katsuki’s voice strained in anger as he clenched his jaw.

A cigar appeared in the King's hand and he took a couple puffs, before his dark eyes bore into the red ones. Calm anger stirring in them that made the younger God gulp but he still didn’t stand down. “Sit down Katsuki. Since you demand that your complaints are so worth my time, let’s go through this, shall we?” Aizawa’s voice was dripping with cold emotion and Katsuki tensed before sitting down, regretting his decision of coming in

“I hired that, what did you call him? ‘Mailman’, because I saw the population go up in the mortal world. When the population goes up, that means there will be more deaths, correct?” Katsuki moved to speak but Aizawa shook his head, his eyes glowing red in a threat. “I didn’t say you could talk- to be honest, your voice annoys me. So just nod or shake your head.” Huffing, Katsuki nodded as he looked away with a frustrated blush, trying to keep the cough down from the smoke that now filled the room.

“So I do something, nice, and you barge into my office, on MY company time, YELLING at me? I think I’m a pretty reasonable man, there’s never been riots here. No complaints, it runs smoothly, I think that I’ve proven myself to be reliable. Wouldn’t you agree?” The angry king seethed with smoke blowing through his nose, Katsuki only nodded slightly but Aizawa noticed. He always noticed everything. “So if you agree, why come and waste my time when you could've even scheduled a meeting?”

The red eyed man was stuttering, only to be interrupted by some laughing from beyond the office door and in came Hitsoshi, also known as Hecate, followed by Izuku and Y/N. You (e/c) eyes met dark ones that look in desperate need of sleep and a hug, taking a deep breathe you blinked away and tried to hide the blush on your face as you ignored the butterflies in your stomach

“Shouta- I didn’t realize Baku-please just fucking go already, was here” Shinso smirked, earning a glare from Bakugou as he clenched his fist. “You asshole, the next soul I bring will be yours I swear to god-” Before anything could happen, the cat in your arms jumped down and formed into a giant version of itself and hissed at both of them, keeping them apart. Everyone’s attention now on you as you smiled sheepishly.

“Ahem… hi, I’m Y/N, and I’m the Goddess of Monster, and I came to work here with my parents!” Aizawa felt his mouth go dry as he looked at you, eyes quickly skimming your figure and he flinched when he heard a glass picture frame crack on his desk… fucking power losing control. Izuku was by your side and smiling, but also making sure Katsuki and Shinso kept their distance.

“Oh c'mon Izuku, she’s not a child! Look at her-” Shinso smirked lazily as your face grew even redder as you whispered a small thank you. Katsuki tsked and rolled his eyes at you, looking at Izuku with a scowl. “Just because you think you’re some big, don’t expect people to treat her any differently. She’s just some newbie.” Katsuki was grumbling and Izuku huffed at his attitude, but it just made the cat hiss more at Katsuki and nudge Y/N in a comforting way and you finally found your will to speak

“Oh! Y-yes thank you cutie!” You quickly whispered to the cat, before making your way to the king himself and holding out your hand with a smile, “I wanted to thank you for giving me a job, and I heard from my father that you have to stay up guarding the gates to this place yourself, so I made you a little guardian…” Aizawa was stunned and he smiled softly, making every man in the room freeze in their spot as he took your hand gently and shook it. “Thank you… He looks like a Cerberus, doesn’t he?”

You laughed at the name, and oh god your laugh made his heart flutter in a way it hasn’t- well ever before. Looking at you even his eyes smiled slightly before he noticed you two were not alone and he coughed, fixing himself, putting the emotional guard back up and on duty. “But, you really shouldn’t have Y/N…. I hired you because of your abilities and plus every god and goddess that knew you spoke highly of you, so it was a good decision on my part.”

Eyes meeting the ground, you had to bite back the smile on your face as you took in deep breathes, “Well then take Cerberus as my act as your employee. No take backs, plus he really is a sweetheart and he deserves a good owner!” How could Aizawa argue with that? Simply he nodded before looking at the other men and raised his eyebrows, “Well? Don’t you all have jobs? I don’t bite. I just plan on taking her on a door, an orientation if you will.” Nodding, the men left but you father snuck a quick hug before he went. Feeling eyes on you, you looked up and smiled, “I can’t wait to see your kingdom, aizawa…”

*•*

You walked side by side with the king himself, a crown on his head as everyone he passed seemed to hold their breath and straighten up just a little bit more. The sight alone made you giggle, because all these people looked so afraid of a man who smiled so kindly at you, it confused you. “What has you giggling little goddess?” Aizawa’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts and you looked at him and smiled, looking at his raised eyebrows.

“Well… I just- you have the kindest smile I’ve ever seen yet everyone we’ve passed has held their breath and paled like you’re horribly mean. I don’t mean that as offense, I just find that your eyes are too kind to hold any type of evil.” A blush was prominent on your (S/C) cheeks as you finished talking, Aizawa himself seemed to be in a daze. “I’m sorry- that was weird! I didn’t mean to get too personal or weird!” The floor was now deemed more interesting as you started rambling, only stopping when a large hand was placed on your shoulder.

“Thank you… no one has ever said that about me or to me, for that matter, before. It means a great deal…” How he was even forming proper words was beyond him right now because even walking next to you in silence was hard since the smell of your perfume was overwhelming and making his senses go into overdrive, not to mention he can feel your body heat and he so badly wanted to maybe, just maybe, hold your hand. What was he thinking?! He just met you! Fuck fuck fuck- Izuku would kill him- hell he would kill himself for falling for such a young...beautiful… nice… goddess.

“Aizawa-” A hand- no YOUR hand waving in front of his face brought him out of his thoughts and he shook his head cursing under his breath “ ‘m sorry, just got lost in thought…” The soft smile on your face brought his nerves peace. “It’s okay.. we all have those moments! Anyway, you mentioned Tartarus before? Is that one of the places I have to work?” As soon as you mentioned that place, Aizawa’s face grew hard and his eyes were darker with an emotion you couldn’t place. “Promise me you’ll never go near that place little goddess. It’s a horrible place filled with true monsters. And since you’re similar to a fertility goddess, they’ll want to tear you apart.”

Nodding quickly you felt a shiver run down your spine at the demanding tone of his voice and the powerful stance he took. “I promise…” Your voice was a meek whisper and it made Aizawa feel horrible for being so hard on you. “I’m sorry Y/N, I didn’t mean to be so harsh, I just if something happened to you, your father would never forgive me…” and I wouldn’t forgive me, he wanted to scream… but he didn’t want to seem like a creepy old man. Of course it wasn’t weird for gods and goddesses to feel powerful emotions like this but- this was wrong… right?

You merely bit your lip and nodded, before walking forward, “It’s okay ‘zawa, sometimes you can’t turn off being king huh?” Your laughter filled the air and he just followed you as you both continued the tour. Everytime you could, you would sneak a look at the raven haired man, how could someone be so- beautiful? He took your breath away, really every detail was just so pretty, even the scar on his cheek bone, all you wanted to do was touch it and ask him about it then kiss it when he told you.

Sadly, like aizawa, you couldn’t help your thoughts and insecurities get to you as you kept thinking about maybe being flirty, see where it takes you… you were too young, plus you were here for a job! Strictly business! You’d be branded if you got with the king, your parents would be shamed! And if he turned you down what would he think of your parents? Would they lose their work here? Gods you couldn’t do that to them… hell, was he even single?

*•*

“Shoutaaa” A woman's voice made you both jump just as you were coming to the end of the tour, and Aizawa automatically grimace as he saw the green haired nymph. “What do you want Emi?” It was like you weren’t even there as the woman- now known as Emi walked up to Aizawa and flung her arms around his shoulders with a devious smile, “You know what I want…listen I’m sorry for not making it the other week, I was just tired…”

Aizawa pushed her off and scoffed, crossing his arms. “Yeah and I’m tired of you taking me as a joke. You have a job, and you’re lucky you still have that job. Get going” His jaw clenched as you merely looked at the situation, the woman looking taken back, her eyes finally settling on your form “Is it because of her? She doesn’t even look like she could handle you.” Her bluntly lewd statement made both you and aizawa blush before he spoke up in your defense, the lightest blush on his face.

“She’s the daughter of a friend Emi. Not that it’s your concern anyway, but this has nothing to do with her.” Emi rolled her eyes before trailing her fingers down Aizawa’s jaw and clicking her tongue, “You’ll be back.” Her voice was confident and sassy as she turned around and sauntered off, leaving you with a confused face and aizawa looking like he was about to blow. Well… I guess that answers your question. Mentally you just state his relationship status as: ‘It’s complicated’...

Taglist; @present-mel @maya-ngpirit @a-match-into-themoon @nhievyenne @negansnumberonewifie @darkqueenhyde @minfani @the-british-koala @lhcartoonist @fairy-inthegarden @creolemimi @taylor----wonderland

[lightsandlostbells]

wtFOCK season 3, episode 4 reaction

Kiss kiss fall in love? More like kiss kiss stay away from me.

I have to warn you. This is the episode where I lost it. I had to go back and edit so much unhappy capslock out of my notes. 

Episode 4

Clip 1 - Het drama again

Zoë shows Milan a video of the shooting prank. Milan asks about romance on the trip, Robbe says there were too many people and too little privacy.

Senne and Zoë have tension because Zoë is pissed that Senne was partying? And that he was posting pictures of parties on IG when she wasn’t there? I mean … look, I’m never a William fan, but this seems like Zoë’s problem. If you can’t trust him to behave when you’re gone, you SHOULDN’T BE WITH HIM. And if you feel like you can trust him, this dude going to bars or whatever shouldn’t bother you. At least it seems to be portrayed as Zoë’s issues. Milan mentions that she’s jealous. He seems to like Senne, and I do find that dynamic cute so far.

I do appreciate that the Noorhelm drama this time is boring and not like “Senne was mad about how Zoë handled her sexual assault” levels of offensive.

That being said ... Robbe’s story. Where.

If you’ve been telling a very tight story so far, where Robbe’s personal journey has been steadily progressing clip by clip, then a clip like this wouldn’t be that bad. We absolutely have not been watching a tight story. Even with the next clip of Robbe doing some introspection, I’m like ... can we not make every scene count toward his story when there’s so much catching up to do? Ten seconds of Robbe looking vaguely troubled out of a two-minute clip that’s mainly about Zoë and Senne’s relationship does not count. A better writer would find some way to make Zoë/Senne parallel to Robbe/Sander, like how Noora talking about William and “if he loves you, he’ll choose you” in the first clip of episode 4 is relevant to Isak sitting there texting Even and Even choosing his plans with Sonja over Isak.

Clip 2 - Milan and Robbe talk gaydar

Robbe checking out Sander on Britt’s IG … finally, some cyberstalking. Did he take a screenshot of a pic of Sander? Lol.

Milan sits down and asks Robbe his opinion of a guy on Grindr, sexy or not? Robbe is lukewarm, giving neutral answers, Milan says he’s allowed to have an opinion on whether a guy is hot or not.

It feels SO WEIRD to have this clip so late, and I’m trying to like … recalibrate my brain so it’s not just because it’s later than usual. I don’t inherently hate if a remake changes up the order of clips. But the problem is that we’re now FOUR episodes in and it feels like Robbe’s sexuality crisis has just begun, I guess? Or rather, efficient storytelling would start out with this clear view of what Robbe’s issues are, rather than muddling into it a few episodes in.

Milan’s all, this guy says he’s not gay, but he likes to blow guys. This turns into a conversation about Milan’s gaydar and how to know if a guy is gay. In the original scene, the purpose of this conversation with Isak and Eskild was there as a way of Isak figuring out if Even was gay. That ... does not really fit this version, because this clip is so late in the season. Isak was getting Eskild’s wisdom right after meeting Even, when he had nothing but a BJ reference to go on. But Sander eyefucking Robbe while kissing Britt and leaning in to kiss Robbe should be pretty big clues to Robbe that Sander likes men, no? And that he likes Robbe specifically. Yeah, Robbe might be doubtful because Sander is still with Britt, but nothing new has happened since the almost kiss to make Robbe doubt! It would make way more sense if they’d adapted the opening clip of OG season 4, with Even texting Isak that he had plans with Sonja, into the clip prior to this one. If Robbe had texted Sander an invitation to hang out, or even just a “hey, what’s up?” and Sander wrote back “plans with Britt” then it would be an understandable transition for Robbe to have some doubt about Sander’s sexuality in this clip, like hey, maybe he’s not actually into me, after all.

The scene might make sense if you think about Robbe listening and applying Milan’s words to himself. Thinking about how there’s “something trapped in them that desperately wants to come out.” Wondering if it’s obvious to other people that Robbe is gay. It still doesn’t quite work and I actually doubt that was their intention (I think it was all about how to detect if Sander is into guys) but I am searching for any scraps of Robbe introspection, so.

OK, at least they had Robbe immediately look up Grindr (I laughed that he searched “grinder”). Good! Sexuality conflict! Why is it so late! Although it was probably more about trying to find Sander rather than a personal move on Robbe’s part.

This is a very gay song, btw (I Like Boys by Todrick Hall). 

Clip 3 - Robbe and Yasmina talk het drama

Aaron talks to Robbe about sitting close to his teacher to see her boobs and the teacher saying she knows why he’s sitting there. I highly suspect this is just a dream Aaron had, unless the teacher said it in a pissed off way. Throw his ass in the back row, big-breasted teacher!

Robbe meets up with Yasmina. Yasmina wants to know the dirt from the seaside, Robbe fills her in. Soooo are they good friends, or what? He tells her about Aaron and Amber and they laugh and stuff. I mean it’s cute and all but like … where is this coming from? Did they become great friends in the S2 that I didn’t watch?

And that’s the whole clip … again, I ask what was the point? 

To establish that Robbe and Yasmina are friends? Way to undermine the development and importance of that relationship by basically cutting through the buildup and hard work to the payoff. Sana and Isak meant more to people BECAUSE they started off prickly and grew to like each other and respect each other via their actions and words, right? That their conversations were more interesting because of their opposing views and resulting friction? That the friction was extremely relevant to the religion discussion?

Was the point to talk about Aaron/Amber and how Amber supposedly isn’t interested? We don’t need Yasmina’s commentary on that at all since we could see how Amber herself reacted to Aaron. Like if Yasmina was all, yeah, Amber couldn’t stop talking about Aaron, she says she doesn’t like him but I think she does, then I guess I could see the relevance of this conversation since it’s “new” information ... but it’s just the same shit we already know. And again: why spend so much time on a SIDE HET ROMANCE during a gay character’s season? Two of out three clips in this episode so far have been about side het romances!

This clip was just not needed at all except to set up Robbe and Yasmina so the impending religion conversation feels mildly less like two characters who have barely spoken on screen suddenly have an intense and somewhat personal talk. Something they could have done in earlier episodes instead of the other repetitive, unnecessary clips they’ve done this season. 

Clip 4 - Dance chicks

At Noor’s dance performance, Robbe’s pals are drooling over the performers (and honestly being rather inappropriate and distracting). At least they got Robbe’s lack of interest right. Even though they have established this FIFTEEN THOUSAND TIMES with the lack of interest in Noor, like this clip almost doesn’t feel necessary at this point! If they’d had it earlier in the season, sure, but now it feels redundant. Like we really super mega get it by now that Robbe’s not into the girls.

The instructor thanks the performers at the end and Robbe says that he was “so gay.” Hey, except you know what? THERE IS NO BUILDUP TO THIS MOMENT. ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NONE. Except for the homophobic jokes from his friends in the previous seasons, but there’s nothing I can recall in this season.  But more importantly, Isak’s similar comment was prompted by him taking the gay test in a preceding clip. Taking a quiz about generalizations of gay people, rooted in homophobia! Which Isak applies to the dance teacher! In order to distance himself from being gay! WE GOT NONE OF THAT HERE. For fuck’s sake.

There is no setup or reason why Robbe goes from being somewhat neutral about gay people with Milan asking him about the Grindr dude two clips ago - where Robbe is just kinda like, yeah OK, whatever, you think everyone’s gay, Milan (but he’s not overly grossed out or homophobic) - to this moment where he’s making a derogatory comment about a person he perceives as flamboyantly gay. This scene just happens because it did in OG. And the thing is, obviously you can attribute Robbe’s reasoning here to internalized homophobia. We know internalized homophobia exists and why he has it. But this is a scripted narrative, and any scripted narrative needs to have things happen for a reason rather than just because.

I remember complaining that Skam Italia had a bizarre take on this scene. But that’s nothing compared to the laziness on display here.  

Jens is like WTF at Robbe’s “so gay” comment, it’s clear he’s not feeling it. I do like that Robbe gets defensive when Jens scoffs at him. They ask Robbe why he’s such a downer lately and if it’s because of his dad, or because of the Vlogs. Robbe blames the vlogs and yells and walks off, they’re confused.

Lol I just realized that I don’t think there was any followup to the prank from the seaside trip that had Robbe all pissed off. Nothing to show that the boys reconciled or that Robbe didn’t get over it right away.

I have a big problem with the way the boy squad is characterized so far, and it might be because they come across as more self-absorbed than other boy squads, as well as having a more superficial bond. I feel like so far they’re a rather cynical take on teenage boyhood. Again, not expecting them to be perfect or to be overly mature, but this show has to do a lot of work to make me believe they have the empathy or maturity to deal with Robbe’s situation kindly. (EDIT from the future: lol)

Clip 5 - Robbe and Yasmina talk religion

Oh shit, somehow I didn’t connect that dots that Aaron mentioning the teacher’s boobs would lead to THE boob teacher making an appearance! Unless there are multiple teachers with notable breasts at this school.

Another scene of Robbe not interested in breasts ... I mean, not to sound like a broken record, but this would have been good about three episodes ago.

The teacher is talking about religion and Darwininsm and creationism, which prompts Robbe to complain about how people still have religious beliefs in 2019.

Heavy fucking sigh. Have we gotten ANY religious moments from Robbe’s mom this season? Or from anyone else? Do the writers realize that Isak grilling Sana about religion was prompted by his OWN MOTHER’S religious beliefs and his fear of her judgment of his sexuality? No? Not surprised.

For real, Robbe just complains about religion out of nowhere … and like, obviously religious homophobia isn’t a rare thing, it exists. But it has not been established why Robbe in particular cares about the effects of religious homophobia, compared to say, the casual homophobia of his friends, or gay stereotypes, or gay bashing … we don’t know why religious homophobia has PERSONAL relevance in Robbe’s life. And yes, this is a concern for every gay person! But from a STORYTELLING perspective, there should be some focus as to what Robbe’s main fears are about being gay. Lack of acceptance from his peers? His family? Religion? Violence? Homophobic slurs?

I would say based on previous seasons, the most compelling basis for Robbe’s internalized homophobia would be the homophobic attitudes of his friend group. A revised take on the dance chicks scene might have been done with this in mind, but it wasn’t, and so it’s all just very muddled. 

Anyway, Robbe goes on this tangent and asks Yasmina why she believes in God. The teacher voices what I thought and is like, why the fuck are you talking in class?

Again, there is NO BUILDUP to the involvement of religion at all. They have this shoehorned in friendship, I guess so he can ask her. He does bring up homosexuality at least, and how religion is so black and white.

Yasmina asks him what he believes. ONE THING they got right: they had Robbe challenge Yasmina on an intellectual level, and so Yasmina challenges him on an intellectual level right back. Because a lot of their dialogue is lifted right from OG, that’s why it works. LMAOOOO. Yasmina points out that homosexuality is an evolutionary “dead end” so therefore it can’t be genetic, so what is it? A disorder? A choice? I will also give some credit for her invoking the most anxiety-causing options to get under Robbe’s skin.

But the tone of their friendship does come across very different, because in the previous scene they seemed like good chums who had a rapport, and here it’s like Robbe lashed out at her for no reason, even less than Isak did with Sana, because Robbe just decided to torch his friendship with Yasmina out of the blue. I guess the answer is that Robbe is cranky so he decided to grill Yasmina over religion, but again, the fucking question is: why was he cranky? Two clips before this one they were on warm, friendly terms. In the last clip, he lashed out at his male friends, but that has nothing to do with religion. What the writers are asking us to do is basically just imagine all the stuff that’s happening in Robbe’s brain instead of doing their jobs and showing it to us. You don’t have to spoon feed us but you don’t also get to stick a few peas on a plate and wonder why we’re going hungry.

(REALLY. IT WAS NOT PROMPTED BY ANYTHING, NOT A TEXT FROM HIS MOM. WHICH IS WHY ISAK WAS UPSET AND LAUNCHED HIS INTERROGATION AT SANA.)

(CAUSE AND EFFECT, MOTHERFUCKER)

Clip 6 - Bowie playlist

Robbe is doing homework when Sander sends him a Bowie playlist. Robbe listens to Space Oddity and has a brief Moment. It’s very nice but wow, wouldn’t it be even better if Robbe fell for Sander listening to that? Say, in the last episode? Before they almost kissed? And before Robbe was suddenly declaring himself a Bowie expert to Noor?

Sander calls him, I like Robbe fixing his hair before he answers. It’s a video chat, gotta look his best! They have an actual conversation about Bowie and they flirt. Sander invites Robbe to the cafe later and Robbe is happy except then Britt is in the background and apparently she’s going with them, so it’s not a date after all, oh no. Robbe’s actor is good at subtly conveying his disappointment here.

Robbe hangs up and sticks his head against the bed (lol) and then goes back to Grindr. He immediately gets messages for horny sex and then gets rid of Grindr. 

At first I was like, yay, this clip had a clear point and a sense of cause-and-effect, but now I’m like ... ehhhhh. Because the purpose of Robbe checking out Grindr is either A) so he can look for Sander or B) so he can check it out as a general way of exploring his sexuality (or both). The suggestion is that it has a lot to do with the former, because it was part of Milan’s advice as to how to find out if someone’s gay. But it’s a little weird here, because Robbe just saw that Britt was coming along to the cafe, so he should be discouraged about Sander. I mean, I think it’s still possible that he’s trying to figure out if Sander likes him because he’s getting mixed signals between the playlist and Britt, but it’s just a little off. And as for option B, I’m not sure why now of all times is the best time for that, like if you think about it, the sting of getting his hopes dashed should be the predominant emotion here, would he go straight to Grindr just to be like hmmm, maybe I’m into dudes?

And it bugs me because there is a super easy fix to this clip! Just have Sander send the Bowie playlist, Robbe listens to it, and as he’s daydreaming and smiling a bit, he gets out his phone and checks out Grindr, ready to search for Sander. But there are too many sex messages so he’s just like WTF and gets rid of it. Then Sander calls and they have this conversation that ends in Robbe being reminded that Britt is still in the picture. (Or he doesn’t need to get the sexy messages at all, I mean they’re kind of funny but I’m not sure they’re plot-necessary here.) 

Noor texts him that they’ll meet up later. It’s not 100% clear but it sounds like she knew about meeting up with Sander and Britt, so that means Britt probably told her previously. Which is a little bit of different context from OG, because I was under the impression that Even asked Isak to hang out with them hoping that they’d be alone, and then somehow Sonja found out and made it into a group thing with Emma, making Even grumpy. With this it seems like it was planned as a group thing from the beginning, Britt knows they’re meeting up later.

Or wait, when Sander says he’ll give Robbe advice at the cafe later, does that mean Robbe already knows they’re meeting up? That would make sense because it’s what happened in OG (Even invited Isak in an earlier clip and then Isak found out Emma and Sonja were coming in a later one). They’re incorporating all kinds of OG elements in this episode so I wouldn’t be surprised. But I assumed that this was the invite because we didn’t see Sander talk to Robbe earlier this week? Shouldn’t we have seen that clip since it’s the first time they’ve interacted since they almost kissed? I checked the texts for this episode and I don’t see anything like Sander inviting Robbe, either? Did I just miss something? What is going on?

Clip 7 - Robbe is late to meet Noor

Later that day …. Robbe rides a bike. Very fast. The music is dramatic! This would not be out of place for an O Helga Natt scene

And yet it’s not OHN, it’s Noor? Noor seems annoyed. Because Robbe is late. OH NO THE TENSION WHATEVER WILL WE DO. WE CARE A TON ABOUT ROBBE AND NOOR.

Noor is super pissed at him and starts screaming and shoving at him. What the actual fuck? She complains that she thought he was dead or something and is mad he didn’t even send a message. She says fuck you and walks off. Robbe follows her on the bike.

I don’t know how popular this opinion is, but Noor did not come across as great here, like when I watched it I was baffled at her response. I say this as someone who is chronically early and also gets annoyed at lateness. She has every right to be annoyed that Robbe is late and that he didn’t message her to tell her he’d be late, and I get that there’s supposedly more to her reaction than just this one incident. But the screaming and especially the shoving at him is just WTF. 

Also, she told him to meet him at 19:00, and the beginning of the clip is at 19:21 (I see what you did there) and Robbe arrives like a minute or two later. So he’s 20 minutes late, which is certainly annoying, especially because it’s dark and chilly outside, but IMO not a cause for “I thought you were dead or in an accident!” and the OTT reaction. 

Clip 8 - Robbe and Noor fight

Sander and Britt are in the cafe, Robbe and Noor argue outside about him giving her mixed signals. Has ... he ...?

OK, I’d say I half-see her case, and I half-don’t. If Noor can somehow sense Robbe’s disinterest during their makeouts or lovey-dovey moments or w/e, then I can buy that. I think there are slight moments where he doesn’t seem into it. But Robbe has put so much more genuine effort into their relationship than Isak did. He hasn’t even turned Noor down for sex, really, they’ve just gotten interrupted every time, or she’s thrown up. He didn’t want to go to her dance performance except then he told her he would go approximately thirty seconds later. He went to her dance performance. He went to the seaside with her and kissed her and slept in the same bed with her. This is the first time he’s actually fucked up with her.

Noor sounds ridiculous right now. “Do you still love me?” Uhhhh what??? You’ve been dating for less than a month, really? Did he tell her he loved her at any point? I’m serious, is there some material I missed? Some nuance in the language that didn’t completely translate?

I get it, I’m watching insecure overdramatic teenagers! I’m just wondering if I’m supposed to be on Noor’s side here. They could have portrayed this less OTT and more fitting to Robbe’s actual offenses.

Anyway Robbe and Noor have a screaming fight in the street and he says he can’t breathe anymore because of her. I can buy that even if it’s dramatic because he’s feeling trapped by her due to his sexuality. She walks off, Sander and Britt come outside. Britt goes after Noor and hugs her, Sander sings Space Oddity to signify the crash and burn of Robbe/Noor. He has on a Pink Floyd shirt so at least his musical taste is more varied than Bowie.

Clip 9 - Robbe and Sander by themselves

Robbe and Sander drink alone at the bar, they don’t think the girls are coming back. Sander texts Britt and then tells Robbe they’re going to do something else. He shows him Britt’s text saying that Noor needs some time alone. I mean. this drastically changes the context of them going off together … it’s not because they want to be together, necessarily (although they do) but it’s by default now.

So they leave.

Yeah, I do not love what they did with this scene. It’s short and to the point but I want to point out a few things.

First, because again, there’s no need to break up most of these clips into such short, choppy scenes just because 15 or 20 minutes have passed in-universe. It might be exciting if you happen to be watching and following at the exact time these are being posted, but it also messed with the flow of the scenes and the build of emotions. Imagine if we cut off after Isak and Even left Emma and Sonja and then 10 minutes later we got them riding around on a bike. We’d missed that beautiful transition from the silent, empty room to Isak on the bike and then Head Over Heels kicking in. That’s one of my favorite moments in season 3 and it’s because of that transition. It’s because I was sitting there watching this uncomfortable scene and wishing Isak and Even could be alone and then they got to be alone and my stomach swooped! If you break up moments like those, there’s just not as much build. (Or imagine - horror of horrors - an O Helga Natt where Isak gets the text from Even and it cuts off after he runs out of the church and then resumes when he arrives at the school, so we don’t see his journey. You lose so much.)

Second, there is a curious lack of romantic/sexual tension in this scene. It’s there on Sander’s end, I think, or at least you can read it there due to his focus on Robbe and even some of his body language. Robbe, on the other hand, seems more upset that his girlfriend who he doesn’t even feel genuine attraction to has walked out on him rather than the fact that he is sitting next to the boy he’s crushing on, alone together, right before they share their first kiss later that evening. And it just makes me want to know why. 

I don’t blame Robbe’s actor at all, because it’s the director’s job to tell him how to play the scene. But I rewatched this scene trying to be generous, and there is not a single shred of attraction or tension from Robbe toward Sander.  He checks the cafe door when it opens, he asks Sander to text Britt, and when Sander suggests they leave, Robbe’s first instinct is to ask what if Noor comes back. He sits there moping into his beer the whole time. He doesn’t sneak looks at Sander. He doesn’t try to talk to Sander about anything except Noor and Britt. No banter, no discussion that’s focused on them, Robbe-and-Sander, you know, the main couple of this season (supposedly). It doesn’t even feel like he’s consciously trying not to look or interact with Sander because of the romantic tension. No, it genuinely feels like Robbe’s #1 thought right now is Noor. Does that make sense to you? It makes sense for him to be a little out of sorts due to the fight, but does it make sense that Robbe seems to have no perceptible reaction to being alone with the guy he likes? Does it make sense that they didn’t take this chance to throw in some romantic and sexual tension in order to pave the way for the kiss that is going to happen very shortly? Gotta say that I think this scene exemplifies my earlier complaints about how Noor was so prevalent early in the season and how Robbe/Noor was built up. Because once again, Robbe/Noor has taken precedence over the undeveloped Robbe/Sander pairing.

Finally, as I said above, the situation makes it so that Robbe and Sander are on their own by default, not by choice. Combined with the bizarre lack of tension, that makes this scene fall totally flat. There’s no sense that these two really really want to be alone together. There’s no joy in them running off together. Robbe actually seems reluctant to go off with Sander. And not even because he’s fearful of what might happen, ooooo things might get a little gayer than I can handle right now, but like he’d rather sit here and drink and think about his girlfriend. 

It’s like they were concerned that Isak and Even were too mean to Emma and Sonja so they decided Robbe and Sander would only be alone because it was the girls’ decision to leave them, not the other way around. We even get that text from Britt so we know that Noor totes isn’t coming back and it’s OK for them to leave. I have no idea what their actual motivation was to construct the scenario this way, though. I would love to know. (The answer would probably annoy me so I’m better off not knowing.)

It’s little stuff like this that makes me want to sit down the writers/directors/whoever’s behind wtFOCK and have them watch scenes from Skam S3 and write an essay on the construction and execution of clips. Do some homework about timing, tension, narrative structure, and everything else that makes S3 work. 

Clip 10 - Smooch time

It’s 21:21 so you know what’s happening. Also, bullshit! Why is this happening so fast. You haven’t earned this!!!!

Sander buys them booze. The Sander actor is very good, honestly. I like his screen presence. It is a testament to his abilities that this relationship is working for me at all, because it sure ain’t the writing. (Robbe’s actor is doing well, too, but the writing is dragging him down since he’s present for all this nonsense.)

This scene of Sander and Robbe drinking and riding bikes is genuinely good on its own and they have strong chemistry when they’re allowed to show it. They have easy banter and interaction, there’s a callback to the booking.com reference from when they met. Really, this part makes me sad, because I can see the potential here! If the writing was GOOD, if the story had a legit direction, if it was just better storytelling all around … this season could have been wonderful, they had the right guys to do Isak and Even’s story justice. Instead it’s like this one terrific moment in a sea of wtFOCK.

If they go in the pool I will roll my eyes. C’mon, guys, you DO NOT HAVE THE SYMBOLISM to do this scene. It had a meaning in Skam, in most of the remakes it’s just an arbitrary location.

Yep, it’s a pool.

Sander takes off all his clothes so he jumps in bare-assed, and Robbe laughs. Sander yells at Robbe to get in the pool so Robbe does a fucking striptease while Sander watches, more or less, and he’s about to get in the pool in his underwear, but Sander is like “all the way or no way” so Robbe takes off his underwear after a brief moment of hesitation and jumps in. So they’re naked in the pool. Cool cool cool.

 Seeeeee, on the one hand this COULD be a moment of liberation, I could see it, taking off the clothes and jumping in as a representation of abandoning the stale hetero life or w/e. But I don’t think wtFOCK has built anything resembling a clear arc for Robbe, to the point where this act means anything, really. (Can you imagine Isak doing this in episode 4? I don’t know if it fits his character at that point, but I could at least be like, OK, this is part of his ~rebirth and I think we’ve built him up enough that this moment of liberation feels like a culmination of something.) I’m also not totally sold on the way they presented this, like we’ve got a closeted gay kid alone with his crush and the crush takes his all his clothes off and then Robbe takes all his clothes off with only the barest reluctance (but he’s not like … distressed or worried, just kinda like “aw, man!”) For some closeted gay kids? Sure, guess I could see it! But in the context of “this kid is struggling with his sexuality and he’s alone with the boy he likes and he’s supposed to be going through Some Shit”? Why doesn’t this have a bigger reaction in Robbe? Since they are drunk and not necessarily overthinking things in the moment, however, I will let this slide. Cynically I think this is mostly about trying to make wtFOCK Sexxxxy. I’m not a prude and I don’t have an objection in theory to a teenage couple skinny dipping together, but wtFOCK has a trend of taking a thing that happened in OG and going “How can we do this but more?” and these remakes know Evak is the big sell in fandom, so. They’re making it spicier. (EDIT from the future: Jumping ahead to later content on wtFOCK ... they very much are trying to make it Sexxxxy.)

Also, these guys just haven’t had a lot of buildup yet! And I can see like … rewriting this scene so the first kiss isn’t necessarily some epic release of a simmering tension and growing love, but more of a tentative, pivotal moment with a gay kid kissing a boy for the first time, and having the relationship grow from there. But wtFOCK isn’t doing that, it’s trying to do the Evak thing with the epic romance, and they haven’t earned it.

They go underwater for the breath-holding contest, Sander tries to kiss Robbe (Robbe’s eyes are pointedly closed so this feels like some unnecessary POV breakage) and Robbe shoves him back. He’s still in a good mood, though. They go back underwater and Robbe kisses Sander. Yay, I guess.

Lol, I don’t actually want to sound like a bitter asshole. The song choice is lovely! The cinematography is pretty good! And like I said, they have nice chemistry. It’s just that the storytelling has been so messy up to this point that I can’t get too invested. The very first clip I saw in real time for Skam season 3 was the pool scene - I had just discovered the show a few days prior, and I kept watching the clips on repeat. I could not get enough of this story. I really really needed those guys to kiss. Yeah, I recognize that at the time the story was brand new and this wasn’t the fourth iteration of the same pool scene and the sixth first kiss for this couple, and you really can’t recreate that feeling of not knowing what comes next in a remake like this. Still, I think that if the writing had just been better, I could have been happy and invested in this moment.

I also think that the pool scene in particularly has a tendency to get written in kind of a rote way in the remakes. Some of them have put their own spin on it - I had plenty of criticisms of Skam France’s S3 but I did enjoy their first kiss and I praised that they made up their own symbolism - but some of them have gotten so close to the original, the exact same banter, the interruption at the end, and it doesn’t feel natural for those versions of the characters. I’m not sure if the remake showrunners think that the original scene is something the fans want to see or if they’re being lazy or if they think the OG is just that good (which it is, lol). I don’t think any remake has been that faithful with their O Helga Natt clips, by comparison. 

Anyway they get caught, yadda yadda.

Clip 11 - Morning after the pool smooch

Robbe gets up and sees Zoë looking at Senne, seemingly hungover, on the couch. She makes coffee to spite him since the coffeemaker is loud.

Zoë asks Robbe about last night and says Noor was at the door. Robbe doesn’t tell her what really happened. Apparently Noor looked like she felt bad. I don’t think I can handle more Robbe/Noor, guys. I appreciate that OG didn’t drag out Isak’s thing with Emma once he kissed Even, but I’m not confident this won’t happen here.

Zoë asks if he’s all right. Man, the most effective relationship this season is probably Zoë and Robbe? Which is fine! But like … boy squad ain’t great, Sander and Robbe aren’t well developed, they fucked up Yasmina and Robbe already, Milan and Robbe are way behind schedule…

What if the reveal were that Sander were in Robbe’s bed?

It’s not. Instead, Sander texts him as a cover of Space Oddity plays. Robbe has angst and blocks Sander on WhatsApp. Ohhhh my. Another thing I appreciated about OG? That Isak was all in after he kissed Even, and that the angst came from different places besides the typical gay coming out storyline of “kissed a boy, regretted it, went back in the closet temporarily.” Not that it’s unrealistic, just that it’s done so much.

I think we’re supposed to take away that Zoë saying Noor was there looking sad made Robbe reconsider what happened with Sander? Or just general internalized homophobia. I don’t think the latter is totally out of Robbe’s characterization based on what we’ve seen so far, although I wish there was clearer writing so it felt more like “Robbe has internalized homophobia that made him block Sander” and less like “????? internalized homophobia I guess.” Again, I’ll letting this slide because I can also rationalize it as him being a little drunk last night, and now that he’s sober he regrets his choice, even if I don’t think this is a great choice at this stage in the season.

Clip 12 - The heaviest of sighs

The subs helpfully gave a trigger warning for homophobic slurs so I knew this was going to be “good.”

Robbe is listening to music as he goes home. Sander comes up to him, smiling, wanting to know why Robbe blocked him. Robbe says to leave him alone, that Sander got him drunk and took advantage of him.

L M A O welp, this would soooo kill this ship for me if I were invested.

FIND SOMEONE ELSE, SANDER, YOU DESERVE BETTER

Oh, so Robbe also shoved him and called him a dirty f****t! What a great romance!

No, really - this is the EXACT THING I was so glad that Evak DID NOT DO. I’m not saying their romance has to be free of flaws, that there can never be fuckups, that Isak can’t ever hurt Even and vice versa. But this is such a common and ugly trope in gay media. 

Robbe goes inside and slams his door, Milan asks what’s wrong, Robbe tells him to leave him alone. We get Milan’s POV and not Robbe’s at the end. 

Anyway lmao. wtFOCK indeed.

Did you enjoy the cuddle scene in Skam, where a same-sex couple got to be tender and sweet and open with each other for almost seven minutes? A clip that felt refreshing and even revolutionary for its normalization of gay intimacy? Hahahaha, fuck you.

Okay, seriously though. It’s not a problem that we didn’t have the cuddle scene immediately after the pool scene. It’s not a problem that they want to change up this storyline and make it their own - though again I would ask the creative powers at wtFOCK why they’re making these particular choices. It’s not a problem if Robbe and Sander’s relationship has some extra bumps along the way to their happy ending.

WHAT EVEN PROMPTED THIS CHANGE IN ROBBE, like I get the answer is “internalized homophobia” but Robbe was BUCK NAKED WITH SANDER IN THE POOL so like. Can we please get SOME context for why he suddenly had a freakout? Can we please get some narrative structure with cause and effect? Can we get a fucking reason that Robbe went from 0 to 100? Because if it was just the blocking Sander on WhatsApp, that’s one thing, but accusing him of sexual assault and calling him slurs is so vastly beyond that. If we’re supposed to take away that Robbe feels bad about Noor, that still doesn’t explain the ugliness of his reaction, rather than just telling Sander that he has a girlfriend and it was a mistake or whatever.

I’m going to add that I understand that Robbe went through some additional homophobic shit from his friends in previous seasons - I remember Moyo saying crappy things to him in S1, and I watched a S2 scene where the same thing happens. So I can understand if  Robbe’s internalized homophobia is very strong. But they’ve also cut out so much stuff in this season that added to Isak’s internalized homophobia (no mom’s religion making him anxious, no gay test, no gay generalizations from Emma...) If they want to rely on internalized homophobia from previous seasons, then we really need a reminder in this season, such as his friends making homophobic jokes, which I do not recall hearing so far. And they need to show what happened between the kiss to provoke such a homophobic reaction.

After Sander said that thing about not knowing if anyone would ever love him … why did they do this? I love me some pain in storytelling but this isn’t just angst, this is needlessly cruel.

There is, believe it or not, a middle ground between “conflictless fluff” and “cruel homophobia and assault allegations” where you can have some tension, even have Robbe have a freakout, without bringing in this kind of material. Robbe could have told Sander to stay away without accusing him of assault or calling him slurs. He could have said he wasn’t gay or that it was a mistake or even “I was drunk” without following it up with “and you took advantage of me.” All of these options might have stung for Sander and for any viewers who were hoping for morning-after cuddles, but they also create conflict without pushing it over the edge into OTT cruelty. 

HOW I WOULD REWRITE THIS EPISODE:

Ahahahaha

So far this season is like a disconnected set of scenes from Skam S3 with bonus filler scenes and unnecessary clips about non-Robbe things. It’s getting hard to think about rewrites because the point, if you will, so often so unclear. It’s also hard because this episode squeezed in so many OG scenes that were missing from earlier in the season that it’s like, well, shouldn’t we have had this a few episodes ago? Should we just leave them out now?

Okay. Start by getting rid of the first clip in this episode that’s mostly about Zoë/Senne, bump up the Milan clip. We start with Robbe looking at pics of Sander on IG, Milan comes in and asks if there was any romance on the trip, then they get into the Grindr talk, etc. The Grindr talk makes more sense before Robbe almost kisses Sander, but like. We can’t do anything about that now. What might be better is if the whole “how do you know if a guy is gay?” thing takes a swerve into not just Robbe trying to figure out Sander, but to something uncomfortably close to Robbe’s own behavior (like IDK, referencing body language and how a guy will lean in closer, like Robbe did with Sander) and then Robbe gets cranky because he’s worried he’s too obviously gay to other people. After Milan leaves, he starts looking up stuff like “how to act straight” or “how not to seem gay” or whatever. That leads us into the next clip...

... the dance chicks scene. Now we’ve seen plenty of Robbe being disinterested in girls already, so this time we’re going to show him trying to be interested in girls instead. Like he’s watching his friends’ annoying horny reactions and he’s clearly trying to imitate them and join in, but we can see that he’s awkward and not totally feeling it. But he’s trying. Then after the performance, Robbe makes the comment about the dance instructor being so gay.

There is a problem, IMO, in that Robbe’s friend group has been shown to be more homophobic than the average boy squad (as seen in S1 and S2). And frankly I don’t really believe yet Jens is the type to shut down a homophobic comment. Like in S2 Moyo and Robbe straight up start calling each other f*gs and Jens is like chill, no one here is a f*g, but if there were, you should date each other. That’s his idea of intervention. So I’m not sure how to handle that. 

I don’t love this idea, because I hate what they’re done with Moyo in particular, making him pointedly more homophobic (to be discussed in a future reaction) but Moyo and Aaron could perhaps laugh at Robbe’s comment and start riffing off it, while Robbe is sitting there pretending to laugh but looking increasingly uncomfortable, and Jens notices something is off with Robbe, and he tells the guys to knock it off, the guy is gay, so what? Big deal. Then aside from the other guys, he asks Robbe if something is wrong, and Robbe snaps at him or attributes it to family problems again. 

I was going to also say that the setting for this clip doesn’t really allow for Sander to swoop in, like Even did to return the snapback, but actually maybe it could? Noor could have invited Britt and Sander to watch the show, right? So maybe when Robbe makes this gay joke and his friends are laughing, Sander comes up while Britt is talking to Noor and is like, hey guys, what’s up? Robbe’s friends are just like, oh nothing, did you see how gay that guy was? Then Sander is like, sorry, what’s the problem with being gay? He tells them off a little. Meanwhile Robbe is standing there awkward as fuck, not looking Sander in the eyes, while Sander is looking at him for backup, but Robbe just makes an excuse to bolt. Maybe he walks past Noor without saying anything, so she looks confused.

Now onto Robbe and Yasmina. Man, I truly hate saying this. But: If you are not going to incorporate other religious themes into this season, then you don’t need to redo the Isak-Sana friendship. Again! I don’t like suggesting this! But what actually is Robbe and Yasmina’s relationship bringing to this season when it’s portrayed like this? 

They left out the weed blackmail, which is really just a plot device in OG, but it’s a plot device that sets up Sana and Isak’s thread. It also gets Isak to kosegruppa to meet Even, something which is irrelevant here.

Sana’s main tie to S3 is Isak’s mom. Isak’s mom is religious, that makes him anxious, and it’s a hurdle to coming out to her. Robbe’s mom is not religious, Robbe’s internalized homophobia doesn’t seem to have anything to do with religion specifically other than this one scene with him and Yasmina. It’s just a disconnected tangent. What’s more, what is Yasmina’s eventual advice going to do for him? Sana’s advice led Isak to come out to his mom.

I really like Yasmina. If there’s another way that her presence is relevant to the themes of this season, by all means let’s find it and include her. As it is, either make it that Robbe’s mom is religious and include the Robbe-Yasmina subplot, or don’t and leave it out. 

I would love to see in-depth and meaningful friendships develop among all the characters in the Skam squads, just because I love all those kids. Jonas and Vilde? Even and girl Chris? Eva and Mahdi? I don’t care how random, let’s have them all! But there is a finite amount of time per season, and we can’t extend time for all possible relationships - just the ones that are most relevant to the story we are trying to tell. 

I mentioned above a fix for the Bowie playlist clip that makes it have a little more sense to me. If you include Sander in the dance chicks clip like I said, you could have Robbe thinking about Sander again and wondering if he’s into men since he called out the boys’ homophobia. That’s how he ends up on Grindr. Then Sander sends him the Bowie playlist, Robbe listens, Sander calls and they talk, Robbe apologizes for bolting out of there the other day. Sander invites him to the cafe later, Robbe’s all :D until he realizes Britt is there and is coming too, then he’s :(

He’s late to meet Noor and Noor is upset, but not like ... screaming and shoving at him. She’s more snippy and passive-aggressive, she walks off. She says she’s upset because he ditched the dance performance without talking to her, and then he’s late to meet her, it seems like he just doesn’t care that much. They have a fight but it’s like a normal fight and not The End of the World. Just tone down Noor’s OTT anger and make it more natural.

I don’t have a preference in this version whether Noor and Britt leave the cafe and Sander and Robbe know they’re not coming back, or whether Noor and Britt just go to get some air and cry it out and Sander is like fuck it, let’s leave. The important thing for me is that Robbe sits there with Sander, painfully aware that they’re alone, and there’s lots of tension and awkwardness and his brain is clearly hyper-focused on the proximity of Sander’s knee to his own. They banter and flirt and then when Sander suggests they leave, Robbe acts like he wants to go.

Don’t do a pool scene for the first kiss. Give a shit, make it your own. Except IMO they have done so little to establish this relationship in terms of larger themes or symbolism that they have nothing to choose from. 

Man, what if THIS episode was about going to the seaside, after they had been talking for several episodes, and they kissed in the sea when they were alone? That would be at least somewhat plausible? A take on the pool scene/underwater kiss that wasn’t the exact same.

You could do something related to graffiti, perhaps? Instead of breaking into a pool, they break into the tagging place or wherever. Or something else related to Sander’s artwork, because I know that this comes up in their version of O Helga Natt.

I’m not wild about adding this blip in Robbe and Sander’s relationship after the kiss, because of how much ground we need to cover the rest of the season (it messes with the pacing yet again) and also just because I like that Skam didn’t do this expected route. However, if they wanted to make Robbe try to shut out Sander again: the strongest case for his internalized homophobia seems to be his friends. So have him meet up with them again the day after kissing Sander. His friends bring up Sander and how weird he was at the dance performance about the gay instructor, like it’s just a joke! He took their comments way too seriously! Is Sander gay or something? And maybe Robbe tries to defend Sander - no, he’s a cool guy, really - and then his friends are like, pffft, what, do you have a crush on him? Robbe denies and everybody chills out, but Robbe seems troubled. Maybe this is when Jens finally gets a fucking clue and realizes something’s up with Robbe, and in the future there’s a scene where he shuts down gay jokes. For now, though, we do see how Robbe would feel compelled to go back in the closet. Sander texts him and Robbe blocks him.

Now we come to the worst part. So. Take out Robbe calling Sander a sexual predator and a homophobic slur and pushing him, that’s for sure. If he must reject Sander, do it in another way. “I’m not gay.” “I was drunk.” “It was a mistake.” “I have a girlfriend.” It’s not actually hard to do this clip without adding this ugly taint to their relationship.

Since I’m trying to think of rewrites without just copying Skam, here is a radical change on how to include a post-kiss freakout from Robbe earlier on so the pacing isn’t as odd. In previous recaps, I suggested Sander should be introduced earlier as a mysterious stranger that Robbe is trying to find. Well, maybe we can rework that. Robbe and the mysterious stranger share a kiss in episode 1. They’re hiding from the police or security or something after getting busted at a party or while tagging or w/e, and they’re both a little drunk and high on adrenaline, they’re smiling and laughing because they actually got away, and it just ... happens. The mysterious stranger can initiate it, but Robbe tentatively reciprocates before running away. Robbe freaks out and it’s after this that he starts heavily pursuing Noor. Because, you see, he’s not gay, he was just drunk, and it was all that other guy’s fault. But at least he doesn’t have to see that random guy again, right? No one will ever know. Just like no one will ever know if late at night when he can’t sleep, he does a Google search to see if he’s gay if he liked kissing a boy or if he can’t get it up with his girlfriend. Or if he goes on Grindr to see if he can find the mystery dude. It’s a bust and Robbe gives up and settles into dating Noor. Except in episode 2, OH SHIT, he’s introduced to Sander again via Noor, and it’s awkward and fuck, Sander has a girlfriend. Well, that’s good, right? Totally not a bummer. Anyway, Robbe tries to avoid Sander or tiptoe around him but they end up spending time together because they’re stuck at the seaside under the same roof. Maybe they directly address the issue by Robbe saying he’s not gay and Sander being like “me neither” (which technically is not a lie, lmao) and brushing it off as a mistake, or maybe they both pretend that it never happened. Maybe Robbe is more aggressive about it at first and Sander is like, whoa dude, chill out, I’m not going to tell anyone. Still, they get to know each other, there’s heaps of sexual/romantic tension, and in episode 4 (or 5 or whenever) they kiss again and it’s Epic.

This arc is definitely not the same as Isak’s or Evak’s and I absolutely won’t claim that it’s in the same league as what Julie Andem did, but I can see a narrative arc like this making some sense. Better than trying to do Isak’s arc half-assed.

It occurs to me just like … how little we know about any of these characters in terms of subtext or something? No hints about Sander’s background, really? Let’s get some clues in there.

I think something I miss about Skam was how kind it was. How all the characters were at heart, good people capable of the most generous love and empathy. And maybe we’ll get there with these characters in the end, but overall, so many of these people just don’t feel like that! There’s so much more ugliness and cruelty involved in this story, and it doesn’t feel like it’s done with good intentions, like to show the audience how to handle these situations and to heal. 

There’s this weird attitude of defense where cruelty, tragedy, and negative events are defended in the name of realism and there’s a backlash to the backlash, acting like the critics just want fluffy plotless hand-holding and cuddling, a conflict-free season, or a story where no one makes mistakes. And it’s like people forget that in Skam season 3, the story was FULL of angst! We know Evak get their happy ending but like … from episode 1 all through O Helga Natt, the story is packed with conflict. People hurt each other. Even in episode 10, not everything is perfect. It is very possible to do angst and conflict without this ugliness. Like … I have to assume people weren’t here for episodes 5 and 6 of Skam S3, or for the hotel scene, or episode 9 up to OHN, because I can assure you, there was no lack of angst. There was just a lack of shock value gratuitousness.

As always, let me know if I missed something due to cultural or linguistic context.

[elle-boll]

Backstage - John Deacon

A fic??? On this blog??? Pshhhhhh...

So uh, yeah, I am just making one. All my Roger content and all hopes of continuity are gone, whoopsie, appears I am just lazy. But this is a nightly post from yours truly, and I hope you enjoy some awkward Deaky!!!

Summary: A night at a Queen concert lands you and your best friend backstage, however only one of you is getting action...the other is left to some awkwardness backstage

Warnings: Mentions of sex (no explicit writing!) and some swearing :”)

Word Count: 2K 

---

It was a late Summer’s evening, in the back of the taxi was you and your best friend, Cindy, both chatting with excitement. You were both pulling out handheld mirrors to check your hair. Two pit tickets were nestled in your pocket and you both had a plan devised to make it to the barrier. In her words, she wanted to feel the spit on her face, graphic indeed. The pair of you could barely hold back your giggles as the taxi parked outside the venue, a wad of cash in your hand as you passed it into the front seat.

You both sweaty as you had ran to the barricade, pushing past people but not slow enough to be pushed back behind them. Your hands clasped around the fence as you both stared at one another in disbelief. You both laughed between deep breaths, trying to come back around to yourself, to prepare yourselves. The stage was almost in arm’s reach but your hands just grasped the barrier instead, determined not to be pushed behind the hoards of equally eager fans. The venue lights shone down on the audience as the lights on the stage turned on suddenly, you could practically feel your heart leaping from your chest. 

Throughout the night, you both clung onto each other and sang till your throats felt red raw and sore. Your legs felt weak from jumping around and your arms were tired trying to reach out to Freddie as he pranced around the stage. Your eyes had gone to the very back of the stage to see Roger, his eyes, while on his set, were also in your direction, but not at you. You turned to Cindy and made a comment along the lines of; “I think he likes you!” but you both just cackled at the idea of the drummer of Queen staring at your best friend, and so did she.

The concert had ended with a bang, you could feel your sweat dripping off your forehead and you saw Cindy had teary eyes, you just laughed and took her into your arms, still cheering. You both went to make it to the exit, exhilarated and slowly coming off the concert high when a hand had tapped Cindy’s shoulder. A large man in a suit like uniform had tapped her.

“Sorry ma’am but I’ve been asked to bring you backstage if you have the time?” He asked, holding out an ‘All Access’ pass to her. She turned her head to you with utter shock on her face, but you stared at the man instead. 

“I’m afraid she won’t be goin’ anywhere without her personal bodyguard' You smirked, hearing her snicker slightly. He turned slightly and spoke into a radio attached to his chest pocket, you noticed the logo of a security service embroidered onto his sleeve. He nodded, requesting you both follow him, opening the barrier to let you in. You overheard a few comments made by passersby, some rude, some intrigued.

The backstage was bustling with life, electricians, security, cleaners, all the sorts were rushing around after the concert. You walked down towards a hall in the venue, presumably to the dressing room. 

“Down that hall, no turns just straight on, there’s a communal area, make yourself comfy” He gestured down the hall as he stopped outside a door with the name, “Taylor, Roger” written in scrawly writing with a smiley face next to it on a small whiteboard. You gave Cindy a hug, fixing up her hair and the mascara that had trailed under her eyes, before wishing her luck.

“Pharmacies are open late, so we can grab Plan B” You winked, laughing as you walked down the hallway into the communal area. It was a few couches with a table of water bottles and some empty bowls on it. They must’ve gorged on the snacks before the show or directly after. There was also a large metal container with a label on it; “HOT WATER!!!” and a plastic jug of milk next to it, there was barely any milk left...but just enough for a cup of tea.

You walked over to the table, helping yourself, trying to down some of the water simultaneously to ease your aching throat. You carefully sipped the tea, careful not to scorch your tongue. You placed it back on the table, leaving it to cool, turning around and seeing someone walk in. You were frozen in place as the man looked to you. It was John Deacon, the real bloody John Deacon. You coughed and awkwardly stood yourself up a bit straighter.

“Uhh, if you’re here for Rog...his room’s down there?” He stated, a tone of confusion in his voice, standing just as awkwardly as you were. 

“Is Roger’s girly there!?” You heard someone yell down the hallway, you shook your head frantically and moved your hand over your neck, to say no. “Uh, no, Fred...just a girl, are you lost o- OH! You’re the friend that’s with the girl, ah right, right, well…” He clasped his hands together, the sound of shoes rushing down the hall became louder.

“Hello, love!” Freddie popped around the corner, making his way over, holding his arms out. He looked at you as though he’s known you for years, “I’m Freddie, Freddie Mercury, lovely to meet you!” He introduced. His smile was wide as he hugged you, placing a kiss on each of your cheeks before squeezing you. 

“I hope he’s not been bothering you too long...did you even say hello, John? God, so rude” He tutted, barely even waiting for John to reply.

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost, dear, I do look dreadful right after a performance” He laughed, you tried to not look like a massive fan, trying to be casual. 

“Th-The show tonight...it was fantastic” You smiled, and smiled wider when he pouted gently, placing a hand on his chest. “You’re too sweet dearie, even after Brian’s slip-up,  hm?” He questioned.

“Will you ever shut up about that!” You heard a yell further down. You laughed, glancing over Freddie’s shoulder to see John still looking at you, but turning away when you both made eye contact. You took the styrofoam cup of tea and took a small sip. Freddie had walked to land himself on the couch, sighing loudly as he placed an arm over his eyes.

“I could sleep for a fucking eternity!” He announced, you were still going crazy inside. You looked to John and saw him trying to be subtle as he looked at you. You really regretted settling for one of your brother’s loose button-up shirts and a pair of old bell bottoms, ‘artistically’ stained with paint.

“John, your um, your performance was amazing, you were really good, I was actually like, directly by you, in the audience, I mean” You stammered, watching his head pipe up at the mention of his name. He laughed quietly, waving his hand dismissively. “Just doing what I do every night” He smiled, his face slightly red. He was probably just really warm.

“Why does my room have to be next to Rogers?! I just wanna change without hearing him shag!” A man yelled as he walked into the room, lanky legs carrying him in. It was Brian May. His hair looked great up close, was all you could think of when you saw him. “Fuckin’ disgusting, Deaky can get the room next to Roger and his birds next time” Brian muttered, barely even registering you were there, but when he did, you saw his face fall. 

“Ah, I am really sorry, I usually don’t burst out like that” He apologised, you heard the other two sniggering. He held his hand out, “Brian” He introduced, firmly shaking it. They all seemed so humble. 

“That bird is my friend, Cindy, she’s a big fan as well, she actually cried at the end of the concert,” You told them, going to sit down on the couch, watching as they awaited more from you. You decided to tell them about yourself for a few minutes.

John had sat next to you and Brian had pushed Freddie to the other end of the couch that he was hogging to himself. Freddie appeared half asleep but still intent on listening to you.

“I’ve been to a few concerts, and a lot of pub gigs, and most of the time, Cindy gets taken to the back, we do have a reputation for making it to the barricade...it’s a bit weird to be in the shadows while she takes the limelight, of course she’s gorgeous and I am so proud to call her my best friend, but yeah...I don’t know where I was going with this” You rubbed your temples, laughing a little to try to conceal the fact that you were a little disappointed or upset. 

“I think you’re gorgeous...and I don’t think you need a guitarist or a singer to validate that” John piped up, your head turning to see him, his hair tossed behind his shoulder. You smiled kindly at him, chuckling a little as your face went red. A small ‘thank you’ passed your lips, trying not to giggle. The room had gone silent and in that, there was a series of noises from the dressing rooms, everyone cringed a little. 

It was a few minutes later, Freddie had passed out, his legs sprawled onto Brian’s lap, who also seemed to have fallen asleep. John and you had just begun to talk, the more you talked, the less awkward it seemed to feel. You had sat on the couch in a way that your body faced John, and he had scooted slightly closer but kept his hands to himself. “How long’s it been?” You chuckled, he looked down at his sleeve. “Only forty minutes...you know, I’ve seen a lot of girls get taken backstage by a particular member at our shows, and I’ve never seen someone else tag along, I’m glad that it fills the silence” He smiled, but as he finished his sentence. His lips opened as though he was about to say something else but as he did, a door was unlocked and down the hall, Roger and Cindy walked out together. 

Her hair was frizzy and her cheeks were flushed, she walked slower than she usually did. Her mascara was all under her eyes and her clothes were dishevelled. His hair was a tangled mess and he had a slight smirk on his face, whispering things to her as they approached the communal area. 

“Need a trip to the pharmacy?” You raised a brow, watching her say ‘ha-ha’ before she came and held her hand out to you, to pick you up off the couch. You let her drag you up onto your feet and saw John suddenly stand up, looking at you. You turned to look at him and he cleared his throat.

“We’re in the area for the next few days...if you’re free?” He asked, his tone going back to that awkward one he had when he first saw you in that room. You smiled at him, “Do you have any paper? I’ll give you my number, in case you do have some free time”.

Cindy and you were escorted out by security, who held the shoulder of Cindy as she seemed a bit...weak. 

“Had fun?” You teased, laughing at her as you both made your way down to the pharmacy, which was still open. “Y/N, I’m never gonna have sex better than that...at least not for a bit” She pulled a piece of tissue paper out of her pocket, with a number scrawled on it in whiteboard marker. You both cheered and laughed, still giddy when you bought some over-the-counter Plan B.

[idksupernatural]

Long Way Home: Twilight Zone (Part 1)

a/n: Here's the first chapter!! I'm soooo glad that we were able to post this. I'm really exited to see where this series goes and how it takes off. I have so many ideas for this series. So make sure to stay tuned!!

Summary Series: The Winchesters, Dean, Alex, and Sam, live in an abusive household since they were put into foster care. Eric and Rachael have been their adopted parents since they were put into foster care. Since senior year has come and Dean and Alex are turning 18, Eric and Rachael have been putting the siblings in bad situations ever since summer break and the year prior. What will happen one night everything turns upside down in a blink of an eye? What will happen if Dean is handed his siblings life?

Chapter One Summary: When Dean has to confess a secret he has to Alex, it turns out fairly well. 

Word Count: 2,454 words

Series Warnings: NSFW, 18+ only! under aged smut. Fluff, angst, swearing, alcohol intoxication, underage drug use, underage drinking. Heartbreak, crying, flashbacks, nightmares, trauma. Description of child abuse, domestic violence, self-harming, and rape. Stress, mental breakdowns, anxiety attacks, depression, suicide attempts. Description of blood and injuries, hospital scenes, near death experiences, more warnings. I can go on forever. 

Chapter Warnings: Fluffy Dean, swearing, angst, drunk!Dean, underage drinking, nightmare, mentions of domestic abuse, mention of self-harming(slightly), stressing over Dean being drunk. Slight mention of homophobia. Let me know if I’m missing any more warnings for this chapter. 

Characters in Chapter: Dean, Alex, and Michael. Mentions of Cas, Sam, Charlie Bradbury, Rachael, and Eric. 

This fic goes out to @katehuntington and her 1k celebration, congrats!!! I used ‘Twilight Zone’ by Golden Earring for this fic. Hope you like it. :)

----

'Ask anyone in this school about being a freak and they'll point to me, no questions asked. They always wonder why I'm this way, having a twin brother who rules the school, catching all the ladies, and a nerd of a brother who's too good to be here, who I say is way smarter than me, even though I'm at the top of my classes. But they don't know, and don't want to know, why I am who I am. When it comes to sex and partying, they're all over me and still can't figure out why...'

I type down the words on my computer, trying to let go of my problems. Cas said it would help me lift some pressure off my chest because, apparently, he does it every night to help him calm down. I call bull, but he insists on it. Without even noticing, Dean comes up to the top bunk and closes the computer on me. I barely move my hands out of the way before it slams shut.

"Hey," I screeched, putting my computer under my pillow.

"Bed time, loser," he said, laying down next to me.

I was trying to get comfortable on the bed, noticing Dean doing the same. This only meant one thing, and I wasn't in the mood.

"I was wondering if I can sleep with you and maybe. . .we can talk?" he asked, whispering so they couldn't hear us. I pulled a face at him telling him what I was thinking so he got the hint.

"We-we don't need to talk, I-I actually have to. Can you just, maybe, listen?" He stuttered over his words. Something must be up because he always stutters when something is bothering him. I changed my expression quickly, slightly smiling to make him comfortable.

We settled under the blankets, the room already dark from when Dean closed the door. I could hear Sammy's light snores from the bottom bunk, telling me he was out like a light.

Dean was hesitant to talk to me. His face was open like a book and I could easily read it in the sliver of light that was slipping through the window.

"You know you can talk to me, right? I'm always here for you and-"

"Yeah, yeah, I know. I just don't know how to say it," he said, cutting me off, clearly thinking of what he wanted to say.

"Okay, so," he began. I pulled his hands into mine, squeezing them, letting him know that I was here and that it was safe. "I'm kinda dating Cas. Actually, we've been dating since the summer, and. . .and I couldn't keep hiding this from you. If you're not okay with it, then tell me straight up, I'll be fine bu-"

"Dean, why wouldn't I be okay with it? You always seemed happy with him since we were small. You guys always give each other that look when you see each other, I'm surprised you didn't start dating sooner! I'm happy that you're together. You have someone who can love you," I said. Deep down, I was doing a little happy dance because Dean was so carefree whenever he's with Cas and I'm always happy to see him happy. They've been giving each other googoo eyes since the fifth grade and it's been painful just watching their endless pining.

"Wait, so you're not mad?" I nodded rapidly. "You're completely okay with this?"

"Yes, I am Dean! Quit worrying," I said, trying to reassure him. "But," I began, and his happy expression dropped, "you can't let Eric and Rachael know about this. They will murder you, and that's not going to happen on my watch." I pulled him into a side hug.

"Yeah, I know that much," he sassed back, and I could feel him roll his eyes. He squeezed me tightly.

We layed in each other's arms, and just like every time this has happened before, we found it comfortable. I breathe in his scent, forever familiar in my head. Whiskey (he drinks it a lot, but I don't say anything), oil that hasn't quite come off of him after his shower, and this one smell that I couldn't quite describe, but it was just the smell of Dean and that's all I needed to know.

I could feel sleep overtaking me, the darkness consuming me. Before I let the darkness engulf me fully, I feel Dean lay a lingering kiss on the top of my head.

"I just hope you'll be happy too," he whispers into the air.

Finally, I let the darkness consume me.

I pounded on the door for what seemed to be the hundredth time, growing more annoyed with Dean.

"I've been out here for the past five minutes," I shouted, "hurry and wrap it up!" I pounded my first harder on the door, surprised they have not started to hurt.

I can hear mumbling on the other side of the door, and seconds later he comes out, pulling his shirt over his head.

"Dude, you reek of sex and that isn't the way we want to walk into the house. You know that place is a madhouse! It's already two a.m. and we were supposed to be home at ten forty-five. I'm really glad Sammy asked to sleep over at a friend's house tonight," I scoffed furiously, grabbing at his arm. One look into his eyes and I knew we were fucked. He was drunk. Of course he's drunk! He gave me that smirk, that cocky and full-of-shit smirk, and oh my GOSH I just wanted to punch it right off his face.

"Y'know, y'look. . . y'look funny when yer mad." His voice was higher than it was supposed to be, his words slurring together. He tried to go in for a hug, giggling intensely.

"No, no, no. No hugs Dean! You look like you've been to every sex club in existence, you smell like a bar, and-are you even listing to a word I'm saying?!" I gripped his arm harder, trying to pull him with me to no avail.

"Nope." He popped the p and gave me a goofy smile. God, he looks so happy right now, I thought. I wish I could make him look this happy everyday.

"Okay," I patted him on his shoulder, sighing and loosening my grip on his arm, "okay."

We started making our way downstairs. I grabbed our coats and my purse that were in the hallway closet before I headed back to Dean, who was sitting on the couch, his eyes drooping from drowsiness trying to take over his body.

"Come on buddy, time to get up." I lightly shake him awake. He squinted his eyes at me.

"Uuugghh I don't wanna gooo!" Dean whined. I pursed my lips and rolled my eyes.

"Well boo-hoo your ass. I was down here watching everyone, and by that I mean I was watching everyone making out with each other, sitting here waiting for you." I pulled on his arm, but he wouldn't budge. Then, I smirked at an idea that popped in my head. "If you don't get your lazy ass up, we won't drive in Baby."

Dean's eyes grew wide, and he stood up immediately, swaying. I steadied him, giving him his coat. He stared at it and giggled, and I rolled my eyes and took his hand, leading him to the door.

I open the door, the air stinging my face as I practically dragged Dean behind me, a trail of giggles and nonsense leaving his mouth. I walk to the top of the steps leading down to the sidewalk, stopping at the sight I see.

The yellow light from the streetlamps illuminates the scene of my friend, Charlie Bradbury, kissing some random girl. I stumble, taking a few steps back, and I feel Dean bump into me.

"Shwoops!" Dean exclaimed loudly, startling Charlie and her. . ."friend."

Charlie stares at me for what feels like forever. I wait for her to say something, anything, but she says nothing. I clear my throat and make it down the steps with Dean clumsily following behind me, a weird feeling in my stomach. I mean, it's not like I should care, It's not like she's my girlfriend. We're only friends! And it seems like she was enjoying her make out sesh with whoever that was. . .

I shake my head to clear my thoughts, dragging Dean behind me. He yanks his hand free from my grip and walks in front of me to reach the car, kindly opening the door to the passenger's seat for me.

"M'lady," he says, drawing out the y, bowing down to me, stumbling over his feet. I rolled my eyes, thinking to myself, Why, God, why do I have to be related to this dumbass?

Dean stood upright, his hand fumbling in his pocket to get his keys. Once he got them, he attempted to swirl them around his finger, but ended up with the keys on the sidewalk. He giggled and said, "I'mma drive." I sighed, annoyed, and picked the keys up from the sidewalk. I pushed Dean into the passenger seat, receiving a giggle in reply. "Yer, thehe, really fhu. . .fhunny, d'you know that?"

"Yes, Dean, I know that we established this already. Now c'mon, we need to get out of here," I said, patting his shoulder and reaching out to close the door.

"Okie dokie," he said, laughing quietly as I closed the door.

"This is why Sammy likes me better," I muttered under my breath, heading to the driver's side of the car and getting in.

"You ready? Because I am," I stated to Dean, closing the door behind me and turning the ignition on. When I heard the rumble of Baby's engine roar, I knew we were set.

----

We stopped by an abandoned parking lot for the night, not wanting to go "home." I headed to the back seat and got comfortable, using my jacket as a pillow.

"Dean?" I asked, receiving a hum in response. "How sober are you?"

"Mostly not drunk, why?" he asked, seriousness in his voice.

"Just askin'," I replied back, keeping it short. A feeling I knew too well settled over the car. Silence. It felt like we were wrapped up in silence, and I felt it crushing me. The itch is back on my arms and I shut my eyes tight, not wanting to think about what happened earlier today. The reason why I agreed to go to the party in the first place, to numb the feeling. But, of course I couldn't because I needed to take care of my ass of a brother here. I reached under the passenger's seat and grabbed my new best friend, tequila. I popped the cap off and took a swig, the familiar liquid burning throughout my throat and chest.

After a few moments of crushing silence and me going to town with my tequila best friend, I heard gun shots in the distance. Dean and I startled, looking at each other. We looked out the window to the lot so we could figure out where the sound came from. Dean sprang up from his seat and headed out of the car.

"Dean get back in the car, you don't know who could be out there!" I whispered yelled, afraid of getting caught. I reached out, grabbing his elbow and spinning him around. "You're still wasted, so get your ass back in the car!"

"What if somebody's hurt, Alex?" he whispers yelled back at me. "I'm technically the older one in this situation, so you should just let me go!"

"Letting you go my ass! If you're gonna fight me on this, I'm at least gonna go with you and that is period," I replied fiercely. He huffed, turning away, looking for the potential threat.

"Fine, come on."

"Ugh, fine."

So with that, we walked through the abandoned lot, using our flashlights from our phones. The only things I could hear were our quiet footsteps and Dean's heavy breathing. My heart started thumping so fast and hard that it felt like it would burst out of my chest, and I could hear the blood pumping in my ears with every step I took. Dean stopped abruptly, causing me to bump into him.

"What the hell, du-"

"Shut up, look!"

There it was; the gun. There was blood splattered all over the chamber and handle.

"Give me your bandana," I said quickly.

"Why?!" Dean asked, exasperated, but still reaching in his pocket to get the bandana out.

"Just give me the damn thing," I said, yanking it out of his hand, lay the piece of cloth on top of the gun, and gently pick it up. The gun still warm under my touch, examining it, then putting it back down as gently as I picked it up. "The chamber's still hot but there weren't any dents or scratches on it. So the attacker," my breath hitched, "the attacker-"

"He must have left it there," a familiar voice said, startling us both. "Hands where I can see 'em, darling." I mentally cringed at the name, a shiver going down my spine. I turned around and saw the last person I ever wanted to see, slowly inching closer to Dean.

"What are you doing here? Last time I checked, you moved out of Lawrence," Dean spat, anger growing inside of him.

"Well, you ain't in Lawrence anymore. You're in my turf now, Winchesters." He reached for the gun, pointing it at us. All the sirens in my head were going off, telling me to get as far away as I could with Dean, but we really couldn't do that at the moment because of the gun being pointed at us. And, by the weight of when I picked it up, it was fully loaded.

"Put the goddamn gun down Michael, we all know you won't shoot us," Dean spat, venom leaking from his words, ready to fight him at any second.

"Maybe, maybe not. But one thing I know for certain is that I despise the Winchester's guts." His finger lingered over the trigger.

"Just put the gun down, Michael," I said from my spot next to Dean.

"You guys put me through hell this past year. So, why don't you give me a perfectly good reason to not shoot both of you right now?" He was met with silence, Dean and I not uttering a word. "That's what I thought."

I was starting to realize at this moment that eternal fate has turned its back on us. He pulled the trigger, and the last thing I heard was BANG!

----

a/n #2: hiya! thank you to all of those reading this, i appreciate it a lot. i love editing this story and encouraging my friend, so i hope you love it as well! - Kati Bee

a/n #3: I want a special thanks to my sweet friend, kati bee. I wouldn't know where this chapter would have gone without her. I know many writers say this but feedback and likes are kindly appreciated. It's letting us know that you guys are enjoying the story and wanting us to continue the story, as well. 

a/n #4: forgot to mention that Dean and Alex are twins,17 going to 18, and Sam is 13 going to 14. 

[alfiesolcmons-blog]

Chapter 3: Vivienne Summary: Alfie’s a man with simple needs and a straightforward business logic but when a famous singer catches his attention and he catches hers in return he begins to wonder what’s really best for his life and what the fuck he’s done with the mess he’s created in his neck of the woods. Camden Town, London centric. (also I’m Lana Del Rey trash and she pretty much helped me make this, thank you queen)

Word count: 1,469 Pairing: Alfie Solomons x OC, (eventual Arthur Shelby x different OC) AO3: [HERE]

Ch. 1 [post] [ao3] Ch. 2 [post] [ao3]

Masterlist – Ask Box 

I hear the birds on the summer breeze I drive fast, I am alone at midnight Been trying hard not to get into trouble But I, I've got a war in my mind - LDR

Vivienne performed the rest of her tenure at Hempstead’s Paradise with Alfie in the crowd. She sang to him every night, but he would leave the applauding crowd before she could get off the stage. Vivienne was still happy that he would show up to watch her perform, but the fact that he left before she could even try to speak to him was a clear rejection of her.

She mulled it over in her head the first week after she had met him, and disappointment bothered her immensely, but when the second week rolled around she had come to terms with it. She was still pleased that he came to watch her of course, but she could not even sense a possible friendship.

Vivienne had entered the church after the mass had ended. She sat in the back, at the end of the pew, hoping not to be bothered. She felt a darkness swelling inside her and she knew nowhere to turn to.

She loved to sing but was that really her purpose?

She could sing forever, she loved it after all, but she couldn’t be the object of everyone’s desire forever, she didn’t want that.

She just wanted one person to love her in the end, just one.

She felt alone.

Bruce was there of course, but she couldn’t consider him in the way she wanted to consider someone. After the brief time she spent in the church she took her time to walk back to the Savoy Hotel. She had no plans for the next day and she was enjoying being outside on her own. She walked down a busy street with many street vendors selling apples and an assortment of vegetables, and then she came across a bakery. The blue sign above the shop read “Veronika’s Bakery” in curly letters. For a split second Vivienne wondered if the bakery was owned by Mr. Solomons, she had been walking for a while and she knew that he owned a bakery, but it took her less time to shut the thought down.

She went inside and noticed the calming shades of blue on the wall. There was a portrait of a middle-aged woman on one wall, with small Russian text beneath it. Directly in front of the portrait, there was a display of baked goods, a wooden cash register, and two ladies behind it all.

Vivienne greeted them kindly before she dipped her head down to look at the concealed glass displays of freshly baked goods. She could smell the sugars, jams, and wheat. It made her feel strangely at home, though she never knew any home, to begin with. Let alone one that smelled so freshly of baked bread and pastries.

“Can I have five scones please?” Vivienne had not lifted her head yet. She took a quick glance at the shortcake in the corner. It had an incredible looking strawberry on top, but Vivienne thought best not to buy too much.

When she looked up both girls were looking at her with awestruck. The one furthest from the exit stared at Vivienne with eyes wide and the one next to her, closest to the door, took a quick glance at the window. Vivienne followed her gaze toward the window and noticed a man in a bowler hat and thick black moustache. Vivienne gulped and shook her resolve in place. She opted for the serene look that she often sported.

She cleared her throat, hoping to finally catch the girls’ attention.

“You’re— You’re Vivienne Kelly?” The wide-eyed girl stammered.

“Yes, I am. Can I have five scones, dear?” They both rushed to grab the scones for her. Vivienne was no longer sure if their strangeness was caused by the man that occasionally glanced inside the bakery or the fact that she was Vivienne Kelly.

“Here you are, Miss Kelly. No charge.” She said carefully. The other girl tried to smile at her as she said so.

“Oh, I can’t possibly.” Vivienne couldn’t understand why they were being so strange. Was it really the man standing outside?

“It’s no worry miss.” The girl with the strained smile offered.

“Well, at least let us give you something for your kindness. Put it in your pockets, alright?” She took a pound out for each girl from her handbag and walked around the display to give it to them personally. A pound each was a probably a little too generous as they were part-time shop girls, but Vivienne did have a bad feeling about the man outside.

“You’re very kind Miss Kelly,” the other girl gave her a genuine smile.

“Thank you for the scones girls.” Vivienne took her bag of scones, put her handbag snuggly in the crook of her elbow, and proceeded to leave. When she passed the man in the bowler hat, she passed him with the most haughty look she could muster, her nose in the air, her lips pursed, and her eyes lazy. He didn’t even bother to look at her, and that was Vivienne’s cue to continue her trip back to her hotel as quickly as she could in case the man followed her.

When she got back to the hotel she ordered strawberry jam to her room and sat down at a table on the balcony of her room. Only the top floor had balconies for each of its suites. Vivienne sat down for some leisure time. She covered her scones in strawberry jam, they were quite lovely to taste, and then she began to read her mail. There were several love letters, a few job offers that she left for Bruce to look over in a separate pile and then another letter that didn’t fit either category.

Vivienne’s heart fluttered at the touch of the slightly yellow paper. ‘Annie Clayton’ was scribbled in the corner. Vivienne quickly opened the letter to see what her closest and oldest friend had to say.

Viv,

I have to say I was quite disappointed you didn’t write to me during your last month in America. I was also expecting a gift if I’m completely honest with you. But, I’m happy to hear you’re back. Are you going to tell me about America? I hope you will drop by for tea, whenever you’re in Birmingham for one of your shows.

I also bought your last record. It was absolutely beautiful, honestly. I’m so proud of you Viv, you’ve really done it for us, orphan girls. I love you to bits, but if you don’t come to visit me when you’re in Birmingham next we're going to have to talk. Ha!

I was also meaning to tell you, Marjorie passed two weeks ago. The funeral was as sad as any other funeral. I miss her, and I’m sure you miss her too. She left her six-year-old son behind, remember him? His name is Simon, he’s a good boy, but the instability and his mum passing has been hard on him. He spent a few days with me, and the rest he spent with his aunt. His aunt seemed nice, so I let him stay, it was getting hard on me to take care of him, and I’m sure Marjorie would have preferred his family to take care of him. But I do kind of miss the little boy, he was entertaining.

Rupert left a month ago too, I caught him with a woman at a bar. He had the audacity, didn’t he? But I got the house, so I guess things are fine with me, but I am kind of lonely. So, I really hope you’ll be coming by soon.

Miss you too bits, Viv!

Annie

The letter was a lot longer than Annie’s usual letters, perhaps it was because Vivienne had neglected her best friend during her last month in America. The most dreadful month of her life, she had stupidly shut out her best friend. But she was back and content in England, and she knew now that she couldn’t shut out Annie. She was the only solid and unchanging thing in her life. They had been in the same orphanage together, they had grown up together, done everything together, they were more like sisters than any other pair of biological sisters out there. So Vivienne made a mental note to ask Bruce where her next venues were. She wanted to be in Birmingham to see Annie as soon as she could.

Vivienne cleaned up her mess putting everything back inside the suite and then went in search of a fountain pen and a sheet of notepaper. When she got a hold of her items she went back out to the balcony and sat down, soaking in what was left of the sunlight.

She began to write back to her friend.

[sarcastichotmess-blog]

                                                                                                                                                                           Anonymous said:                                                                      The only reason you like Roman Reigns is because he's an attractive man. If Brock were better looking you would be on his dick too. Brock won and Roman lost, get the fuck over it.      

Okay, look. I said I wouldn’t ever post anon bullshit and I don’t like discourse. But you caught me on a very, very antagonistic day. You caught me on a day where I’m sitting here fuming after a tedious day at work and coming home to... That shit show. So this little bitch is about to go the fuck off. You might want to sit down, sweetie. Take a few notes.

No, anon, I would not like Brock if he were easier on the eyes and here is why. Brock Lesnar is a selfish and greedy and lazy piece of shit who has not put in half the work that Roman has. Do you know how many times your precious saviour Brock has actually defended that belt he keeps stealing from Roman?

13 give or take. That figure and most of the other information I give in this post is based on this lovely little article < here >

13, again, give or take, goddamn times in just upwards of probably 400? days now?

Only a few  of those, roughly 7 or 8 by now ( counting wrestlemania and not today, that would make it 9 I believe, I may be misinformed.) were on WWE programming. The rest were at live events. HOUSE SHOWS. NOT SHOWN ON TV WHERE THE MASSES COULD SEE THE DAMN THING BEING DEFENDED. There is no way faster than that to diminish the meaning and the value of a belt.

Now, if you’re really smart, you realize this means that the main god damn belt on the brand is basically a no show 96 percent of the time. Or it is if I’m figuring it out right.. Math isn’t my forte and I honestly cannot be bothered to sit here and run down numbers for your ignorant trash ass, so.. 96 percent seems like a good ballpark number, but I digress.. That belt is absent 96 percent of the time... Unless he’s contractually obligated to show up and then, if he can weasle out of it, he often does. This makes the belt as worthless as the actual walking limp penis who holds it is. Brock is openly in it for the money and he doesn’t care who he injures in the ring either.. Let’s take a little trip back to memory lane, shall we?

I don’t even like randy orton, but it seems like a few years back, I remember the walking penis busting him open. Which was admittedly a work that went awry, I believe, but I digress.. Flash forward now.. To Mania 34. The way he busted Roman’s actual fucking face open like a god damn over ripened water melon. And people have said that he basically did this because he was “frustrated”. That was my takeaway, again, I could be wrong, anon.

The man busted another man’s actual fucking face open.. While having an on air hissy fit, basically. He then threw the belt he still has.. At the owner of the company. Now here in the real world, sweetie pie.. If I threw a heel at my boss while I was on the clock?  ( which believe me.. i have a hot fucking temper and I have wanted to do literally so many times more than I have fingers and toes to count on )

You’re fired. Do not pass go, do not collect 200 dollars. They then OVERLOOK this entire god damn incident and nothing is done about it. It’s basically been proven ON CAMERA ON LIVE TELEVISION.. That Brock Lesnar does not care about anyone’s safety but his own. Vince doesn’t fire him. They haven’t given him a proper “doping” test in ages, from my understanding. I mean, if he’s been temporarily banned or what the fuck ever from UFC for doping, for Christ sake.. How obvious is it that he’s most likely still on the shit and doing it and Vince is letting him.

He’s too damn bulky. He moves like a cracked out dinosaur in the ring.. The smallest exertion has this motherfucker pouring sweat like... Me when my lazy ass bothers to go to a gym and exercise.. I don’t like bald men. If he had hair, I still wouldn’t like the muscled up freak of nature. He has an ugly soul. Not to mention, if he is doping, I ain’t interested. he couldn’t get it up nearly enough to satisfy my sex crazed ass and at that point, I gots to go. This motherfucker could look like god damn TOM HARDY or CLIVE OWENS and I’d still stand and watch him burn if he were on fire. I mean, he could be an exact clone of either man and I’d still be like, “Nah, I’m good. Keep that little shrimp in ya pants.”

And don’t even get me started on the way his disregard for his co workers safety indicates to me that the man is violent to the point of insane most likely, and I’m just not about to fuck with that. Because I’m not going to go for a man who takes pride in being a shitty enough person to bust another one open.

If I can’t trust this piece of shit to care about a co worker’s safety, anon, how in the fuck would I trust him with mine? Simple.. I would not.

Now, onto Roman.

He works his god damn ass off to put on a show for all of us ( including shitty and ungrateful idiots like you )  and what does he get?

Booing. People batting god damn volleyballs around during his matches, chanting for retired or dead wrestlers. People harassing his family and him on social media.

He carried an entire feud. It was him doing those promos, putting in that work. It was him calling Brock ( and Vince by proxy) out. It was him, fighting for a belt that now, thanks to Brock the actual walking bag of dicks, is meaningless. It was him who got the stitches and all that after Mania when Brock threw a hissy fit because “Waaaaaa! This match is going on too long, I can’t keep up!!”

I can admit that yes.. Part of my attraction to Roman is aesthetic. But the largest majority of it, Anon is the fact that he gives a flying fuck about his job, he treats people like actual fucking humans and not just pit stops to a big fucking paycheck.. He’s careful and as far as I know, he hasn’t purposely set out to injure anyone he’s worked with, unlike ya boy, patron saint of flaccid dicks... He does what he does, with pride, despite being shit on and disregarded by motherfucking clam brained pussies like you. And to me?

Any man who has that much pride in his work ethic, who will bust his ass for every single fucking thing he has.. Well, that’s more of a turn on than some shampoo model hair.. Or a tight ass. Or a sexy smirk.

Not to mention he’s actually capable of an intelligent conversation. When is the last time your caveman actually carried on a conversation that wasn’t 99 percent voiced by his “advocate”? Can the fucking monkey even speak? Or is he only allowed to grunt when Heyman tells him it’s okay?

I mean even in interviews he seems like he’s incapable of talking for more than five minutes without the old gray mass in his skull ( what he hasn’t killed with the steroids ) crapping out and him just sitting there, a blank look.

Sit down, anon. You’re dismissed. Oh and by the way? I posted this to an actual post and not in the ask form just so I could block your ass. Kindly get the fuck right off my blog now and maybe step on a few nails and legos on the way out, babe.

[taeliciousdaelicious]

Instagrammable || kms

Genre: Fluff (’cause I’m a sucker for this kind of toothache)

Pairing/s: You and barista!Minseok

Description: You were out to meet your friends but unfortunately, your go-to bubble tea shop was full already. You were in search of a possible place to hang out in when you found this gem tucked away in the busy city—and it comes with its own cute barista, too.

Note/s: I have no other excuse except for I was lazy to start this fic just in time to finish and post it for Minseok’s birthday. But, better (extra) late than never, right? Also, this was inspired by a café my friends and I found by chance when we had nowhere to go and were on a budget. This is gonna be an extra short drabble so don’t expect too much—

Word Count: 2,155

“I’m free later. Are we going to meet at our usual spot?” While speaking on the phone, you squeezed into a soft, pastel yellow sweater, putting it over the Mickey Mouse shirt you wore since you were lounging at home. You decided the black leggings would do as you decided to spice up your outfit with brown, high-heeled ankle boots.

Your friend responded with an affirmative and you smiled. It had been a while since the four of you last saw each other. Ever since all of you officially became working women, there seemed to have been lesser opportunities and time to meet up. This made you look forward to today.

“Alright, I’m all dressed up. Remember the rule: whoever is the first one at the usual spot should inform everyone whether it’s full or not so we could decide what would happen” you reminded her. She merely scoffed and agreed, knowing everyone would follow it since the said rule had never failed to serve your group during instances like this. You said your farewells before grabbing your purse and stepped out of your apartment.

Your usual spot was a bubble tea shop with an all-day breakfast diner. It was a popular place for students since it was right next to a university. This was where the four of you hunched over your textbooks and paperwork as you studied late into the night or early in the morning. You’ve been regulars for so long that the staff only needed to greet your group upon entering the establishment before they start making your usual orders.

Riding a bus, you sat next to the window and thought about what would happen later. Would one of you rant about their insufferable colleagues? Or maybe a date gone wrong? What kind of stories would you share later as you caught up with each other’s lives? It made you excited all over again as you considered the possibilities. Since you were merely a bus stop away, the ride was short as you got off and started walking towards the familiar building.

Judging at the amount of people sitting by the windows, you already guessed that the shop might be full today. Still, you trudged forward and went in, the windchime tinkling to signal your arrival. The lady at the counter looked up and gave you an apologetic look. You knew already that they weren’t about to empty out anytime soon.

You walked up to her and flashed a small smile as you said, “Hello. Have my friends come here before me?”

She chuckled and shook her head no, adding, “If they were here, I would have known immediately, especially with how loud your group is. All of them are loudmouths except you. Sorry, sweetie. Shop’s full today. Best of luck in finding somewhere to hang out.”

Sighing, you nodded your thanks and stepped out into the sidewalk. You fished out your phone and sent a quick message to all of your friends.

Y/N: Usual spot is full. Head home or head out? (Sent at 5:48 P.M.)

They replied right away and the decision was unanimous. No one was going to let this day pass without seeing each other’s face. So, you started moving again, now in search for a place to meet them and be able to catch up.

Y/N: I’m on the move already. I’ll text once I found a place! (Sent 6:01 P.M.)

It took fifteen minutes of walking around aimlessly before you found the right place you’ve been looking for. None of the establishments you passed by appealed to you. They were either too mainstream, too expensive, too boring, etc. They just didn’t seem like something you and your friends would all like until you found the little coffee shop tucked in a corner, a street away from the main business center. Suffice to say, it was Instagram-worthy and you were sure your friends would swoon upon seeing it.

Its storefront was the timeless, grilled windows that were huge enough to allow passers-by to peek in to the interior of the shop. It was reminiscent of a classic, Western coffee shop found along a line of establishments. You found your feet directing you to it and your hand touched the cool handle, pushing it open to enter. There was also a windchime here that announced your entrance. For a moment, you thought you were alone—that is until a person jumped up from behind the counter.

“Good evening, miss! Welcome to Infallible!” he cheerfully greeted you. The sudden action made you yelp in surprise and stumble back for a few steps. You both looked at each other with wide eyes before you nervously laughed at him.

“I’m sorry. I’m easily surprised and, well, I thought this place was deserted or something” you said awkwardly, unconsciously tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. Now that your brain wasn’t ringing alarm bells in your head, you finally noticed how cute the barista looked. His uniform only made him even cuter and you had to make a conscious effort of not being too obvious with the staring.

“Right. I’m sorry. I thought there was a thief because I was busy fixing some stuff under the counter” he explained, laughing a little. “Anyways, I’m Minseok and I’m your barista for today. How may I help you, miss?”

“You’re open for business, right?” you asked. Then, realizing how stupid that question must have sounded, you quickly backtracked and said, “I’m sorry. I should have looked at the front door for any sign or something—”

His chuckle broke you out of your rant and he kindly said, “Calm down, miss. It’s okay. I’m happy to answer your question. Yes, we’re open for business.”

You nodded at him, unable to look at him directly out of embarrassment and shyness. “Um, okay. I’ll just... go sit in that booth over there. I’m waiting for my friends. We’ll order later once they arrive. Yeah. Sorry for bothering you again. And what’s the address of this coffee shop again?”

After giving you the complete address, you thanked him one last time and scurried to the booth. You focused your attention solely on your phone as you typed out your text message before sending.

Y/N: Hey guys, I’m in this coffee shop called Infallible. Here’s the address. Get you asses here in ten or else. Last one is in charge of buying the snacks. (Sent at 6:20 P.M.)

After sending it, you immersed yourself in logging into your social media accounts, scrolling through your feeds to pass time. You did anything to avoid looking at the cute barista who made you self-conscious. Soon enough, your friends started appearing and finally, you were complete.

Without any preamble, one of them said to you, “Okay, girl, why didn’t you tell us there’s a cuteass barista here? My hair looks like a bird’s nest from running all the way here just so I wouldn’t pay for snacks! I’m broke as fuck but holy hell, look at that gorgeous eye candy. I bet if we take a picture of him and post it online, it would become viral. Shame on you, Y/N, for withholding this vital piece of information. Shame on you.”

You laughed merrily before crossing your legs in a sassy manner. “Of course, I can’t be the only one who should make a fool out of herself because of a certain good-looking guy. Alright, we’ve stalled long enough. Time to order food and drinks for ourselves.”

You all stood up and went to the counter to quickly give your orders. Just like what the worker said back in the bubble tea shop, your friends were all loud—except you. When it was finally your turn, Minseok gave you a bright smile and said, “Hello again, miss! May I get your order?”

You smiled sheepishly at him and replied, “Hey again. I’d like a regular-sized, iced coffee, chocolate-flavored. Oh, and go crazy on the whipped cream. I apologize for my friends’ rowdiness, by the way. It’s been said that we bring a hurricane of noise wherever we go.”

He laughed as he started getting a plastic cup and a permanent marker. “No, don’t be. It’s exactly what this coffee shop needs. Better than being as silent as a tomb. What name should I put on the cup?”

“Um, Y/N” you told him and he swiftly jotted it down in neat strokes. “Here’s my payment.”

“Oh, thanks” he said, accepting it. He looked at you with curiosity in his eyes as he punched it in. You felt a little strange under his scrutiny before he finally spoke up as he handed you your receipt and change, “I’m sorry if I’m staring too much but I was wondering... uh, was that your real name? That name you gave me?”

You blinked in surprise and laughed a little. “Yeah, that’s my real name. Why? Are you going to stalk me now or something?”

He laughed as well, his cheeks faintly reddening. He rubbed the back of his neck as he looked at you through his lashes. You couldn’t help but swoon at how great his features seemed at any angle. Just then, he said, “I just thought it’s a beautiful name, Y/N. I should probably start making the coffee.”

“Oh, sure! Sorry, I’m keeping you from working” you said awkwardly. You flashed him a smile and tilted your head as you told him, “I’ll go back to my friends now. It was nice talking to you, Minseok.”

You turned around then and hurried to your seat. You missed the stunned look on his face at the mention of his name but your friends didn’t, as well as the rest of your interaction. When you looked at them, they were wearing knowing smiles.

“What?” you asked dumbly, a defense mechanism that everyone seemed to have. This just made them smile wider.

“I think I know why Y/N didn’t tell us about the barista. What’s his name again? Ah, yes, Minseok” your friends teased you. You weren’t able to control your reaction when you flushed a little. They simply laughed at your reaction, to which you groaned in embarrassment.

“Shut up. I swear, I just forgot to tell you about him” she mumbled. They still didn’t believe you and kept on teasing you a little longer before they diverted their attention to another topic. Welcoming it, you started contributing your thoughts to the conversation and the flow went smoothly after that. It was fun while waiting for your food and drinks as you were able to exchange silly stories, memorable experiences and complaints that had all piled up since you last saw each other. There was something bittersweet about the entire thing. You couldn’t help but think about the amount of time you would have to spend without them again.

Suddenly, there was a hand outstretched in front of you. You noticed how muscular the arm was and immediately, it jolted you back to reality. You were met with your friends’ amused faces and Minseok looking down at you with a small, shy smile on his face. “Hi, here’s your drink. Sorry for interrupting your train of thoughts. I guess I’ll get going now.”

You mutely accepted the drink, feeling the coldness seeping through the stack of tissue paper wrapped around the plastic cup. Unconsciously, you followed his figure until he turned around and met your eyes. You froze on your seat, making him visibly chuckle behind the counter.

“I suggest that you better get his number” one of your friends said excitedly. You blushed at that while giggling.

“Nah, if there’s imaginary sparks, I would be more than embarrassed. I don’t want to risk sacrificing this gorgeous place for a gorgeous face” you said, sipping the coffee through the straw. You made a sound of approval before commenting, “Oh my god, this is it. Whenever our usual spot is full, we go straight here, you hear me?”

They laughed before falling silent. You all made positive comments about the drinks and the food, immensely satisfied with your discovery. You were about halfway through your cup when your friend sitting beside you said, “Hey, what’s that thing peeking through the tissue paper?”

Frowning in confusion, you checked it yourself. Gently peeling it off the cup, you gasped in surprise when you saw digits written with blue ink on the white surface, coupled with a smiley face.

“It looks like there’s no imaginary sparks and you don’t have to ask for his number. Damn, I should have started a bet” your friend murmured. The girls took turns in passing the paper around to confirm it to their disbelieving eyes, squealing and probably already planning how to dress you up for a possible first date. Smiling widely, you turned around to see Minseok smiling as well, looking straight at you. He raised an eyebrow, as if asking something. You merely breathed out a laugh before turning your head away.

“Alright, give me the damn tissue paper. Now, where did I put my phone? Oh my goodness, help me find it!”

[imaginaryculturepress-blog]

TFTP: Rise Against in Perth, WA

In which we photograph Rise Against and have the best shuttle and replacement bus experiences ever. *Mexican wave.*

Hi, hello, and welcome!

My name is Skyler and oH MY FUCKING LORD YES I PHOTOGRAPHED RISE AGAINST. I honestly cannot believe it either, but here we are. I guess I make up for that with my really shitty lenses and positioning though, so I'm back to being a pathetic idiot. For real though, I was using your standard 18-55mm f3.5-5.6 kit lens and it made me want to die.

We're only one paragraph down and I've managed to include an abundance of self-hatred and suicide references... how fun.

Before we begin, I'd like to take a moment to thank the lovely lads at HBF Stadium and VenuesWest for their assistance in gaining a photo pass, even if it wasn't a "proper", "entry-to-the-pit" one; this experience was actually extremely educational, teaching me to try out new angles, avoid photographing the same people (for social images) twice, that I really need to pay more attention to my camera modes, and that I should just get new freaken lenses. Furthermore, it's only necessary to thank the amazing Bare Bones for hooking us up with a reviewer pass. The guys are some of the kindest and talented people I've had the pleasure of meeting, and seeing them live was incredible. So thank y'all kindly.

Anywho, let's get to it:

T'was a lovely Wednesday 7th February when I found myself doing some last-minute transport calculations and failing to print a ticket. After dragging my lazy ass out of math class I headed home, only to realise that I hadn't worked out a proper schedule for our train-to-train-to-Grill'd-to-bus-to-HBF Stadium trip. It was at this same point that I realised that the Freo line wasn't operating that evening from 7pm till Thursday morning; you know, so it'd be closed

after the concert ended and busses stopped.

Furthermore, I had a pathetic excuse for a digital ticket that refused to transfer or print itself, thus I was in a complete panic.

So I did what any good concert photographer would do: I decided to wing it. The trains, the busses, heck, even the mushroom burgers and tickets. Just go with the flow. What ever will be, will be. Et cetera.

I was of course to regret this when I found myself sprinting to the Freo train and not regaining my breath until we reached Claremont Station, but it's fine. It's all fine. Just go with the flow. I had to become Boxer from Animal Farm;  "I will work harder". "Napoleon is always right". I will plan better. Grill'd burgers make everything alright. Something like that.

Soon enough, we found ourselves at Grill'd, ordering mushroom burgers; you know, those vegan ones we get every single goddamn time because Grill'd only has two (though very amazing) vegan options... besides the chips. But nobody counts that. Regardless, t'was an incredible lunch/dinner/linner and I might've become addicted to it.

We soon headed for HBF Stadium, where after an hour of hectic "I've never photographed here before", I was assisted by a wonderful VenuesWest employee. (I don't want to mention names as I don't know if they'd be all right with that.) The place was crawling with eager concert-goers, and there's nothing I love more than listening to their conversations. It's weird and creepy, I know, but they're usually highly opinionated and I love to answer or debate them in my mind.

After a little while longer of waiting, the show was about to start.

First up were Bare Bones, some of the best lads in the whole of Australia. I first met them last year through an interview for Hysteria Magazine, in which I was wrongly credited by the publication. I also reviewed their album Bad Habits (2017) and was a fan of their music, giving them a 5/5. Anyone gonna comment on how that's a plain numeral and not "play this at my funeral/5"? No? Well regardless, I've matured since my days at Hysteria and now use fancy ratings, not those basic af number things. (I'm still salty at Hysteria. That will never change. They're in my book of Most Disliked, alongside Gina Rinehart and Supposed Manager.)

Though I'd only had a five-minute phone call with the band back in May, they appeared to be very humble and down to earth. This was confirmed that night, with Bare Bones playing one hell of a set before Rise Against. I was proud to say the least; I realise it's not my place to care, but I've been attentive to these guys' music for a little under a year, and had seen them grow as musicians. Sure, I had no clue as to what was occurring behind the scenes, but from a fan's perspective, they were progressing in the right direction.

Their performance was phenomenal. A slightly tough crowd, considering the majority of people were too busy waiting in lines for booze, but those present seemed to love the set. The lads did a fantastic job, and I had a bit of a fangirl moment when they played "Thick as Thieves"... stop judging me...

They were the perfect way to start the evening, even with the red lighting.

Intermission.

The lights dimmed, the crowd screamed, the blogger wrote the same "a band is about to go onstage" line that everyone uses, and lo and behold, Rise Against appeared before us. I had a bit of a restrictive photo pass, and could only shoot from the crowd (the photo pass part of it allowed me to bring in professional equipment, which the general admission was prohibited from doing). It was quite the spectacle, really. The guys were super energetic and immersed the entire audience, which is always fun.

We had a three song shooting restriction, which nobody but myself actually followed. I wanted to enjoy the show from a fan's perspective, so after the third song, "The Violence", I set down my DSLR and realised just how incapable I was at audience-ing. But before we get to that, let's focus on this last shooting song:

I was granted permission to run around the venue like a headless goose, so long as I got some decent imagery out of it. So for this song, I ran to the nosebleeds to capture some crowd shots. I received quite a few concerned expressions from staff and security, mostly due to my weird singing whilst shooting; apparently normal people don't do that. But as I was at the top of the crowd, looking down at each and every attendee, I felt at peace. There was something rich and raw within that moment, something that united the entire stadium as one. It was that same emotion that grasped me during SOTA Fest last year, and I loved it. So I took it in. A moment of admiring the scene.

I was soon back in the crowd, and as I said before, I didn't know how to audience properly. I mean, I stood there... just... standing. I sang along to some songs, but felt awkward without a camera and was unsure of where to keep my hands. I was going to run into the pit and join the moshers who were throwing shoes at each other, but then a really sweaty muscular dude almost knocked me over as he headed for the pit, and I realised that if I can't survive the sidelines, there's no way I'd walk out of that pit alive.

So I went back to figuring out where to place my hands.

Rise Against were absolutely incredible. They're such modest people and are wholeheartedly dedicated to entertaining their fans, and anyone with the chance to see them live should do so. There's nothing I love more than (vegetarian and vegan) musicians showing a love for their fans and being the sweetest people ever whilst jamming the fuck out and hosting one of the craziest mosh pits ever. (SOMEONE GET THEM A GRILL'D MUSHROOM BURGER, THEY DESERVE IT!)

Inter- fuck, it was over. But don't fret; this post isn't. We've still got a Drunk Dudes on a BusTM story to tell. Actually, there's over an hour of bus tales to tell, so I think we're gonna summarise it as follows:

- We got to the shuttle and were greeted by a seemingly chillaxed bus driver.- Soon the bus was packed full of drunken weirdos and I loved the atmosphere.- Everything was about to intensify when the driver began, well, driving.- He actually drove like a maniac and was going way over the speed limit; everyone loved it! (Dead serious, no sarcasm. It was amazing.)- Some random dude with a thick Aussie accent screamed "SICKIIIIIIIES FOR EVERYONE TOMORROW!"- Everyone replied with "hear, hear!"- The driver should star in the next Fast and Furious film.- He was driving super recklessly so the drunk guys up the back decided it was only necessary to do the Mexican wave.- When they finally perfected the wave - sorry, we all perfected the wave, because everyone was engaged and loving the moment - someone shouted "GO TEAM" really loudly. - They were being the hilarious drunks and I wished I had some of the beer they were having. Well, I did; it was spilled on me at least three times during the show. Nevertheless, I hadn't drunk any and I regretted that.- The driver ran a red light.- It was kinda like that bus in Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban and my geek self was thriving.- Unfortunately we reached Claremont Station and had to get off the bus ://- The trains weren't operating so the Drunk GangTM (I'm included okAY I WANT TO BE A PART OF THIS) trekked to the bus stop. - The replacement busses were running late so we had to stand there for over half an hour. I loved it.- The Drunks were trying to hitchhike and scared a lot of passing traffic.- They started terrorising passing Grill'd employees and screaming "ONE OF US! ONE OF US!" until we were all chanting.- There was one couple who seemed to be normal backpackers but they were having some weird-ass conversations regarding red suitcases and pillows. - We were getting pretty reckless so somebody called the railway security Transperth people whose profession titles I've momentarily forgotten.- It took a fair few patrol cars to keep us at bay. It's not like we were harming anyone, though; just screaming at passing cars. - I wish I took a group photo of everyone but that would've required crossing the street and it was midnight and I had no energy left to avoid getting run over by a truck. Or the shuttle bus. In all honesty, I was mainly concerned the bus would arrive the moment I got to the other side of the road and would leave without me.- The replacement bus finally came and barely anyone paid for their tickets.- It was one of those large ones that had a caterpillar in the middle (what? I can't explain things) so we were fortunate enough all fit in and travel together.- I had a lovely chat about the comfort levels of the bus' seats with some obviously intoxicated lad.- One dude boarded at a random stop out of nowhere and was like, "Hold up, y'all are coming from Rise Against? I WAS THERE TOO! FAAAAAAM!!!" - Someone got kicked off unfairly at the side of the road and we still miss him dearly.- After he was kicked off, everyone went dead silent for a couple dozen seconds before someone at the back started singing loudly, "The wheels on the bus go round and round..." and then everyone joined in and Broadway was shook. - We went the really long way and it was like 1am when we reached the Perth bus station.- I LOVE MY BUS FAM AND I WISH WE COULD HAVE A REUNION SOMETIME SO PLEASE CONTACT ME IF YOU WERE THERE AND WE CAN AT LEAST ACKNOWLEDGE OUR BUS PRESENCE OR SOMETHING. PLEASE. I'M SLIGHTLY DESPERATE, I DON'T CARE HOW WEIRD OR CREEPY THIS SOUNDS.

So... that was that. I still love my Bus Family just leave me to cry.

Next up: I don't freaken know, but I'm not writing about Hyperfest because I don't have nearly as many adjectives as I'd need for that. (But Midland Grill'd make the best vegan mushroom burgers and I love them for it.)

MUSICAL SUMMARY:

Bare Bones: mY PRECIOUS FAVES I'M SO PROUD *wipes tear*/5

Rise Against: YOU FUCKEN LEGENDS I LOVE YOU/5

Drunk Dudes on Bus: Y'all should get a musical.ly account and start touring and I'll be your photographer and wE CAN ALL LIVE ON A BUS TOGETHER/5

PHOTOGRAPHICAL SUMMARY:

Lenses: Failed me/5

Camera: The love of my life/5

Lighting: Pretty. Good. Pretty good. -Mike Wheeler in Stranger Things/5

Editing: I had to crop some images I'm sorry please don't hate me/5

My sanity: I JUST WANT MY BUS FAMILY BACK IS THAT SERIOUSLY TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR/5

Live long and headbang, xx-Skyler Slate