#kinda different from what I’d usually post but yeah

[rojocatto]

lost and lonely

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

Leon Day

Summary: The reader makes Dean breakfast on Leon Day and explains what the day is. While she has some fun things planned, Dean shares some of his own future plans with her...

Pairing: Dean x reader

Word Count: 1,000ish

Warnings: language, 15x20 finale spoiler (fic takes place post 15x20 though)

A/N: Enjoy!

_______

“Y/N,” said Dean, scratching his head when he came into the kitchen for breakfast. “I haven’t been in a coma lately right?”

“No...why would you ask that?” you said. Dean pointed behind him to the string lights hanging in the hall, colorful lights twinkling along the wall. “Oh that? It’s Leon day.”

“Who’s Leon?” he asked, padding over to his usual stool, yawning and curling into himself. You ruffled his hair and slid a cup of coffee in front of him.

“It’s June 25th. Exactly six months from Christmas,” you said.

“Is it Leon’s birthday?” he asked. “Whoever he is?”

“No silly,” you said, returning your attention to making pancakes.

“Can I have chocolate chips?” he asked. “Please.”

“Uh we’re out of chips but blueberries instead?” you asked, holding up the package.

“That’s fine,” he said, spinning in his seat. “So...lights?”

“Well Leon is Noel backwards and since it’s six months from Christmas it’s kinda like a mini-Christmas day,” you said.

“Never heard of it.”

“Well most people have never heard of a devil’s trap but that’s a thing that exists too,” you said. He hummed and sipped on his coffee, crossing his legs on his seat. He looked younger like that and you smiled, hoping he was in a good mood this morning. “I only decorated a little bit.”

“So it’s like Christmas? I didn’t get you any presents,” he said.

“We don’t have to do presents. It’s more about, doing things together, making cookies, having a nice dinner together. Maybe take a day off from hunting,” you said. You put your back to him and finished with his pancakes, dropping some fresh blueberries on top for him when you were all done. You hummed and slid the plate in front of him, giving him a fork and knife along with a glass of water.

“I uh, actually wanted to talk to you about hunting. Sam and I saw something online,” he said. You sighed and poured more batter into the pan.

“A new case?” you asked, forcing a smile into your voice.

“This big house in Lawrence. Not obnoxiously big but it’s big, big enough for like eight people I’d say,” he said.

“Is it haunted?” you said, watching the batter bubble and begin cooking.

“It’s for sale. We were thinking of buying it. He was gonna talk to Eileen and I said I’d talk to you about it.”

“About…”

“Buying it,” said Dean. You turned and frowned at him, Dean shoveling his second pancake into his mouth. “What?”

“First off, chew. Second, why would you guys buy a house? You’re not suddenly going to become the Property Brothers are you?”

“No silly. The house would be for us. Obviously we’d ward the shit out of it but yeah, house. What do you think?” 

“Why would we get a house?” you asked. Dean rolled his eyes and you put the rest of the pancakes on a plate, bringing them over and taking a seat beside him. “Like, is there something wrong with the bunker?”

“Nothing wrong with her. But Jack and Cas are up working in heaven and the world’s not so scary...and I did have a house in heaven when I was there.”

“You still haven’t told me about whatever space time continuum crap you broke in order to be back from the dead.”

“Jack just said it was alright so I’m back and considering you weren’t up in Heaven like we all thought you were, we all decided on a do over. I missed you and I liked that house but I want you in that house with me.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m saying...let’s go live in a house and maybe I hunt every once in a while, maybe I run point for some other hunters, if we decide to go that route. Maybe I do something different for work. But I’m also saying, I like waking up and having pancakes and having random holidays and being happy and I can decide to do what I want, for me. I want a warm happy house with my family. You can decorate it for whatever holidays you want if I can have that.”

“We can have that,” you said quietly. You reached over and he already was meeting you there, hugging you with a happy sigh. “You’re really ready to leave all this behind?”

“We can always come visit this place. But I think our family should grow up the way we didn’t get to. We deserve that at the very least.”

“And you said you didn’t get any presents,” you said, holding him tight.

“I may have known you were planning this,” he teased. “I waited a little longer to share the news than I was hoping to but I figured you wouldn’t mind your Leon day present.”

“No, no I don’t,” you said. He kissed you and grinned before he hopped up. He dug around in the pantry and pulled out a bag of peppermint white chocolate chips. “Well now you’re just bragging.”

“I heard we were making cookies,” he said, dropping them on the counter. “Later though. After my yummy breakfast.”

“After your breakfast,” you said, kissing his cheek. “Love you. Best mini Christmas ever.”

“Love you too sweetheart. This Christmas you’ll have a whole house to decorate. Think you can handle that?”

“Absolutely. As long as I get some help?”

“Yeah I think you can swing that,” he said. He kissed your temple and hummed, throwing an arm over your shoulder. “So where’s my present in all this? I mean, I got a house and like a life changing decision for you and I got pancakes?”

“You fucking love pancakes,” you said.

“Guilty as charged,” he said. 

“I’ll make you them every single day if you want, how’s that sound?”

“Every single day?” he hummed.

“For the next week.” He chuckled and nodded. “Love you.”

“Love you back Dean.”

___________

[loveinhawkins]

passing period

ao3 written for @steddiemicrofic May 2024 prompt, “top,” 510 words. Rated G, Missing Scene, post season 1, cw: brief mentions of nausea & vomiting.

The sleepless nights catch up with Steve eventually. He doesn’t know what pushes him over the edge exactly—whether it’s the brightness of the hallway, or even the movement of his bag, the strap rubbing against the bare skin of his shoulder—just knows that he’s tilting suddenly, mid-step.

Before he can slam against the lockers, he feels a hand around his forearm, a quiet, “Bathroom?”

Steve nods through clenched teeth.

He flings his bag off just in time as he’s steered into a stall—promptly throws up into the toilet.

It’s over in what feels like a blink; more time must’ve passed though, because the usual chatter in between classes has faded away.

Over the flush of the toilet, Steve hears a voice outside the stall, “You contagious, Harrington?”

Steve rubs one eye. “No,” he says curtly.

“Darn. Was hoping for a ticket outta class.”

Steve opens the door to find Eddie Munson leaning by the sinks. He’s got Steve’s bag slung over his shoulder, safe from the clinging damp of the tiles.

“Dude, you’re gonna be so late.”

Eddie checks his watch lazily. “Nah, I like a dramatic entrance. Always fun watching the light leave O’Donnell’s eyes.”

“Doesn’t she, like, take marks off for shit like that?” Steve says passively, washing his hands—it just seems like the kind of thing to ask, especially since most seniors have been hurrying around all December, faces pinched with stress.

Evidently not Eddie Munson.

“Yeah, don’t think that’d make a difference,” he says, and maybe the smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes this time. “Not exactly top of the class.”

Steve shrugs in vague acknowledgement. Briefly presses his palms to his eyes, blessedly cool from the water—doesn’t really think anything of it until he drops his hands, sees Eddie just looking at him, a slight crease to his forehead.

Steve feels far too drained to even try and figure out whatever he’s noticed.

“You okay?” Eddie asks quietly.

Steve doesn’t know what to do with the question, too bare in its sincerity; there’s no expected space for him to make a quip back, to play it off.

“Just tired,” he says, “that’s all.”

“Mm-hmm, that’ll kill ya in the end,” Eddie says, sing-song.

Freak, Steve thinks mildly.

“Hey, uh, who d’you have right now, Harrington?”

Steve has to think about it, his timetable hazy.

“Um… Mundy.”

Eddie makes a face. “My condolences.”

As Steve dries his hands, he hears the rustle of paper, a quick pen scrawl.

“Here,” Eddie says.

Steve turns. Eddie’s holding out his bag to him; Steve takes it, before being handed something else: a hall pass bearing a convincing copy of Mundy’s signature.

“In case anyone gives you shit. Folks are still kinda, y’know,” Eddie wiggles his hand back and forth, “since the whole Will Byers thing.”

“Yeah,” Steve says. “I know.” He folds the hall pass. “Um, thanks. How much—?”

But Eddie waves him off. “Nah, that’s your free sample.” He opens the bathroom door, glances back with parting words: “And I’d take full advantage, Harrington. Go home and sleep.”

[impishjesters]

Aggression Distraction

warning(s): canonical character..death? (it's Kaufmo), nondescript type of panic/anxiety attack (honestly the whole thing glosses over exactly what type of mental state you are in, just that you aren't doing so hot after that experience), cursing, minor suggestive content note(s): This can be read stand-alone but goes in hand with my previous post about Jax with a partner (platonic or romantic) who suffers from depression/suicidal tendencies. Can be read as platonic or romantic but written with more romantic intention in mind, consider it like pre-dating romantics or whatever. A/N: It's worth mentioning that Jax's behavior is a little back and forth, which is intentional. This stuff is new territory for him, but you matter to him so he's trying to be a rock for you, he's just gonna be a little shit while doing it though. ♥ AO3 version

With the latest addition of Pomni and the recent departure of Kaufmo, things had taken a slight turn from the usual day-to-day. You weren’t particularly close to Kaufmo, but to see him abstracted like that? Someone you knew, for god knows how long to just..stop existing like that?

It was horrifying.

As nonchalant as Jax had been over the whole thing like he’d seen it a million times, it had yet to leave your brain. Even days later. Days? It’s still hard to tell the passing of time.

Jax had taken notice when your gaze lingered on Kaufmo’s old room, the large red ‘X’ over his face. Every time he’d swing by your room to pick you up or drop you off he’d catch you staring, and he knew it wasn’t a good thing. Sure, nobody really liked Kaufmo, and you knew him for an even shorter time than them, but he had an inkling what had you so..distracted for a better term.

The first day or two after the events left everyone a little thrown off. Pomni stuck by Ragatha like a little duckling, Gangle had taken to trying to fix her comedy mask, Zooble did whatever Zooble does, and Kinger? Yeah, nobody cared what he did. But you? You distanced yourself or tried to at least, Jax was never far behind.

It was sweet really, he’s still getting the hang of this whole situation the two of you got going on and it’s been going on for a while. Honestly? It’s almost scary how well he knows you and is able to silently confront you without you realizing something’s even wrong, like some weird sniffer dog.

The thought makes you giggle.

Jax’s head lifts and his gaze falls to you with a brow raised, it’s not the first time you’ve randomly giggled but usually there’s a reason, generally something he did. And he wasn’t doing shit worth giggling over. Waving him off that it’s nothing he shrugs it off and goes back to his little task that his torso is blocking.

To be honest, you aren’t even sure what he’s doing anymore, he kinda just showed up and said “I need my favourite doll for this new little prank, so get off your butt and come to my room.” And then proceeded to drag you off your bed and over his shoulder like a sack of rice into his room.

A prank that he has still yet to tell you if there even is one.

During the time spent together, there’s something you’ve managed to pick up in the way he always goes with the crowd. Sure there are times he’s alone, but it’s different, it’s like he wants to be alone compared to the times he seemed to be following others around simply because he didn’t want to be by himself. It was something you yourself used to do after all. Hanging out with people you didn’t really care about simply so you weren’t completely alone.

Now if you tried to confront him on this little theory, he’d no doubt make some comment about how he’s not sure if it’s sweet or creepy that you’re staring at him so intently. Then immediately follow up with some spiel about how he can’t watch funny stuff happen to others if he’s alone. “Think of all the funny shit I’d miss!” Or whatever.

“Are you ever going to tell me what this latest ‘prank’ is?”

“Mmm..” he hums as if debating, but it doesn’t take a genius to tell you it’ll be a—“nope!” Called it.

You wanna call him out that there isn’t even a prank, he’s not even doing anything other than sitting there polishing a…bowling ball? You sit up from your spot on his bed confused. “Is that.. the bowling ball from—”

“What you think I went back down to that creepy place just for this exact bowling ball?” he scoffs, this place has plenty of the damn things he doesn’t need that one.

As tempting as you wanna say yes, you know just how lazy and manipulative he can be. “You? No. Making someone else fetch it with some excuse about how it’s got meaning and worth to you? Now that I can see.”

His eyes squint as he throws a grin over his shoulder at you, one that looks almost painful if not for the fact that he’s almost always grinning.

“You know me too well sugar,” he turns to face you, bowling ball balancing in his hand like it weighs nothing to him, “but I hate to break it to you. This really is just a different bowling ball, but now you got me wanting to send Gangle down to see if she’ll actually do it.”

“Behave.” You playfully chide. It’d be hypocritical to say “poor Gangle” after all, you’ve also sent her on a wild goose chase once or twice, even if you felt a tad guilty later on.

He scoffs and places a gloved hand on his chest in mock offense. “I always behave. I’m the textbook definition of the word gentleman.”

“Oh yeah? In what book?” Slipping off his bed, you walk over to him and reach out to the bowling ball only for him to yank it out of reach. Even sitting the bastard has enough reach to keep anything away from you.

Jax waves his arm about every time you try to reach for the ball, there’s no real reason to keep it from you, he’s just fucking around at this point. Plus this little endeavor has kept you distracted and him mildly entertained. “Oh, now that’s just rude doll, have a heart.” You stop trying to get the ball and he waggles it at you like he’s trying to tempt an animal. “You don’t think I’m a gentleman?”

“A man? Yes.” You scoff and push the ball out of your face. “Gentle? Only when you want to be.”

He hisses and tosses the ball aside letting it roll away, no longer finding it fun. “So harsh, you really do wound me.”

You flinch at the loud thud, unsurprising at the lack of dent the ball should have created under normal circumstances. “Oh bite me.”

“Is that an invitation?” His shit-eating grin nearly splits his face in two, it’s a shame the others aren’t around, he loves seeing their reactions when the two of you banter like this.

Like an old married couple.

You roll your eyes and step into his personal bubble, one of his ears twitches out of habit and his shoulders tense but they gradually relax as you get yourself situated on his lap.

It takes everything in him not to spit out something insultingly sweet, he’s heavily aware of your mental state right now and that wouldn’t help. Though he really wants to joke about how this definitely seems like an invitation seeing as how you’ve walked into his bubble and made yourself at home on his lap. Maybe later.

Silence falls between the two of you, huddled up against him with your face buried into his chest. He pulls the blanket off his bed and drapes it around you, it’s not cold per say, but you had voiced once that you still liked the habit of curling up into a blanket. Specifically how you were a fan of blanket sushi? Much to his original confusion.

“You know I’ve seen some pretty gross things wrapped in seaweed, you by far are the grossest sushi-filling doll.”

To which your immediate reaction was to question whether or not he’d still try and eat you. That was definitely not something he thought would leave your mouth. Luckily his quick tongue bit back something along the lines of “Not while the playschool toys are around baby”.

Jax placed one hand on your back applying light pressure while rubbing small circles, the other falling loosely to rest on your lower back. Your arms tightened around him and he gave you a squeeze back, when you got too embarrassed early on to keep asking for him to squeeze you the two of you settled on this unspoken method of asking. And it wasn’t always limited to full-body squeezing either, you’d squeeze his hand, arm, or leg and he’d squeeze back.

The longer the silence went the more his irritation grew, not at you though, just overall irritation at the silence, at seeing you like this. Kaufmo’s abstraction itself wasn’t what had you like this, he knew you thought of it more like Kaufmo dying. Which, who’s to say that you weren’t wrong for thinking that? That thing wasn’t Kaufmo, and now he’s in the cellar doing whatever it is abstracted things do. If Caine couldn’t fix them they might as well be considered dead.

The topic of death and dying almost never came up in day-to-day conversation, maybe a joke here or there but nothing like this. And you were doing so well too.

If he had the ability to fall asleep he would’ve, not that it wasn’t cozy and domestic as shit being all huddled up with you, but he was getting bored. His leg began to wiggle, lightly bouncing you in the process, something you recognized as him being antsy and an unintentional aid in soothing you.

Another squeeze to the lilac torso resulted in another returned squeeze, except unlike the first time, the grip didn’t loosen. It wasn’t suffocating but grounding, the hand on your back stopped moving, and both hands were glued to your back to apply pressure like a weighted blanket. If asked, Jax would probably lay himself on you like an actual weighted blanket—but part of you felt like he’d enjoy that too much and force you into some shitty deal to get him off of you.

The thought sparked a tiny giggle, one that didn’t go unnoticed by Jax. What the fuck were you giggling about? Meanwhile, his ass is going numb (it’s not) sitting here holding you like he’s trying to wrestle a balloon and not pop it. Mood swings aside he’s grateful for the sound, it’s not much but it shows him you were coming out of it. Especially when the giggling starts to pick back up.

“What’s so funny you little brat? Finally gone bonkers?” It’s harsh but there’s a fondness in his tone that only causes you to giggle harder. The lost grin slowly returns to his face and he purposely jostles his leg harder now, bouncing you more chaotically.

The giggle turns into a full-on laugh and he can’t help but find himself grinning more at the sound. “Okay, okay! Enough jostling, I’ll lose more brain cells if you keep it up.”

“Oh, you still have those?” He chuckles. “Here lemme just.. shake those loose too.” Both of his legs wiggle, jostling you back and forth like a boat would, his arms caging you in so you don’t actually go flying.

You let out a squeal following more giggles and hold tightly to his neck until he comes to an abrupt stop. “Jeez, that’s a real workout on the legs..” he mumbles, letting out a little exhausted sigh.

“Hey you did that all on your own, you have only yourself to blame.” Your grip doesn’t leave him in its entirety as you shift on his lap turning sideways, he loosens his grip and grumbles out a “watch it” until you settle down.

After making grabby hands at the arm not trapped behind you he rolls his eyes and relents, giving you his newly free hand. It’s obvious that Jax is pushing his limit at both sitting still and being this vulnerable, and you could keep going on and just soak up the affection full well knowing he won’t actually blow up at you. The others however will pay the price of his pent-up aggression. Perhaps you could lessen that by…

You give his palm a few gentle prods with your thumbs like it’s a squish toy before bringing it to your face, moving it in such a way that allows him to take your jaw and squish your cheeks between his thumb and fingers.

And oh boy does he squish, a bit too roughly but it’s not unbearable as he moves your head side to side. He knows what you doing, letting him have some playful aggression with you to lessen what he’ll put the others through.

You’ve done it before but it rarely does much, he’ll play nice when you’re around then subject the others to his full bull shittery when you’re gone. It does give him a good chance to just fuck with you and squish those cheeks and rattle you around, you’re at his mercy and you happen to make some particularly cute little noises after all. It’s a nice and rare chance to soak up being able to have your face in his hand without him having to subject himself to any embarrassing vulnerable shit of outright asking to touch your face in such a.. intimate-like gesture.

His internal struggles are lost on you though, simply content on his lap, in his arms letting him squish and waggle your head around. You silently count down the minutes, or guesstimate the minutes until he’s had enough and lets you go. At least this time he has the decency to help you stand versus shoving you off his lap and onto the floor.

Jax brushes the imaginary dust from his clothes and puts a hand on his hip, gesturing the free hand towards you. “We done here babe?”

You nod, rocking back and forth before shaking your head. “Lean over real quick.”

He rolls his eyes and groans but does as asked, leaning over to be on your level. Before he can ask why he’s breaking his back you lean up and press a quick kiss to the side of his mouth before pulling away and racing out of his bedroom.

The grin slips for a split second while he processes that you literally had him lean down, just to kiss him and then bolt. That face-splitting grin returns as he strolls out of his room just to see you at the end of the hall giggling like a maniac.

“You know what? I’ll give you a head start, better hope I don’t catch you!”

You bolt off with a squeal and he chuckles, maybe when he catches you he’ll just settle all that pent-up aggression toward you—he’s long overdue for an intense tease session after all.

[angstywaifu]

The Lost Sister - Part 8

Synopsis: Xaden is known as an only child due to his sister who 'died' during the Rebellion. Little do they know she didn't die and has been so close this entire time.

Garrick Tavis x OC A/N: Wasn't going to double post today but I'm feeling generous with it being Valentines Day. Sadly nothing super romantic about this one, but I promise some really good stuff is coming soon! I also have a few more one shots, but my requests are open if you have any more you guys want to send through! The Lost Sister Masterlist | Masterlist

The rotunda is empty as Imogen and I enter. Everyone in the dining hall eating. The feeling of being alone should unsettle me given recent circumstances, but after today I feel like that’s behind us.

Usually I would feel her eyes on me, but as she approached me in the hall I had no idea. Though I had been a little distracted at the lack of Garrick, Xaden and Bodhi at dinner.

She leads me over to the edge of the rotunda, and sits on the ledge, leaning up against one of the pillars. I copy her on the opposite side. For a few moments we sit in silence, looking out over the trees and mountains. It’s beautiful under the moonlight. In the distance I occasionally see dragons flying around. I wonder if one of them will be mine come threshing.

“I’d say I’m sorry for how I’ve acted towards you and what I did today. But I’m won’t. It’s just my weird way of processing this I guess.” She finally says, still looking out over the trees. “But, I can’t assure you it won’t happen again.”

I slowly nod my head. “Thanks, I guess.”

She looks over at me as if confused by my response.

“Not going to lie I was expecting a different response out of you regarding this. Also kind of surprised Garrick isn’t attached to your hip after what I did.”

I can’t help the laugh that escapes my lips. “Yeah well I kinda ran off after he told me he had feelings for me and I haven’t seen him since.”

She narrows her eyes at me and the look she gives me is like she thinks I’m crazy. Which honestly, I definitely am.

“You ran off?” She emphasises each words.

“Yeah.” I lean my head back on the pillar and sigh. I was such an idiot. “I ran off. Like an idiot. And now he’s nowhere to be seen.”

She shakes her head and laughs at me. “Well if it’s any help, I don’t think you haven’t seen him because of what happened. With Bodhi and Xaden also both gone, and from what I could see their dragons to, I think something’s come up.”

I nod. She’s right. In the last few weeks it had become almost normal for the boys to disappear some nights without much warning. But it still felt like it had to do with me. Maybe they went out to help Garrick clear his head. But if that was the case I’m sure either Xaden or Bodhi would have come to see how I was.

“I’m sure Garrick has told you are history and why I’ve been the way I’ve been?” She finally says after a few minutes of me swimming in my own thoughts.

“Yeah, only took me weeks of asking and then snapping at him in the healers quadrant before.” I tell her, earning a laugh out of her.

“I knew I’d like you. Even if I hate how much you have Garrick wrapped around your finger, I can see why.” She says with probably one of the first genuine smiles I’ve seen on her since I’ve been here. “And honestly I did this to myself. He always said he couldn’t give me more than something casual. That his heart lay elsewhere. He never said who, just that they were part of the rebellion casualties. And then you showed up.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to cause any issues. Though was inevitable with everyone thinking I was dead for the last few years. Though I didn’t know Melgren’s plan till the night before conscription day.” I look away from her back out over the valley below us.

I catch the sad look that passes over her face as she studies me. “Don’t be sorry. You being back, as much as its annoyed me in one aspect, has been good the the guys. But can you promise me one thing?” She says as she stands.

I look over at her and nod.

”Don’t fuck it up. He deserves to be happy. And you definitely make him the happiest I’ve ever seen him.”

And with that, she turns and leaves me alone in the Rotunda with my thoughts.

Imogen’s words hang over my head. Don’t fuck it up. Easier said than done. Part of me is over joyed that Garrick shares the same feelings. Though looking back I’m an idiot for not seeing it sooner. I just put it down to us being best friends. Yes he wasn’t like that with Xaden, but I was a girl. Of course our friendship would naturally be a little different.

But part of me is also terrified. What if it goes badly? What if it puts a divide in the dynamic of our group. I couldn’t live with myself if I came between Xaden and Garrick. As much as Xaden is extremely loyal to Garrick, Xaden would pick me over him without a question. It would destroy him. But he would do it. And that’s not something I’d want him to do.

So I do the stupid thing and avoid them. Which sadly is quite easy with how little they are around. They’re in our daily battle brief class, wedged up in the back corner. I know cause I feel their eyes on me despite not turning around to see if they are there. But when it comes to challenges, their appearance is few and far between. And if they are there I do my best to blend into the crowd. As best as I can with my hair colour. Though I haven’t dyed it since arriving, and at nearly 2 months in my natural dark hair has started to shown through. Rhiannon and Violet keep telling me to let it grow out as it looks good with the dark red.

But outside of classes, I rarely see them. I get glimpses of them, but most nights they aren’t at dinner. Imogen makes comments about them being sent out for drills and such. Must be part of being a third year. Though I do notice they are gone more often than the other third years.

A few times Garrick tries to catch me after battle brief or find me at challenges, but somehow I manage to get away. I’m not quite ready to have the conversation he wants to have. But I can’t avoid it forever. A few times I nearly cave when I see the pained look in his hazel eyes. Pain I was causing. Pain I’d seen in Xaden and Bodhi’s eyes as well.

Soon our gym time turns into Gauntlet training with presentation day around the corner. So far our squad has done pretty well. Only one casualty so far. One I had to watch Violet almost be apart of. She hid it but I knew how much it killed her on the inside. She was yet to fully complete the gauntlet and today was our last day of training before presentation day tomorrow.

As we walk up the stairs to the gauntlet my heart drops. Not only is Xaden standing off to the side, Garrick is with him. It wasn’t uncommon for leadership to watch their squads do training on the gauntlet, so far neither had turned up for ours. Of course they show up on the last day.

Rhiannon who is next to me must notices something is off and follows my eyes to where Xaden and Garrick are.

“Why do you look so scared to see Xaden and Garrick?” She asks.

I hadn’t quite built the relationship with her that Violet had, but it was getting there. But I hadn’t told her about my interaction with Garrick after the challenge with Imogen.

“Remember how he took me to the healers after my fight with Imogen?” I whisper to her so the others around us don’t hear. The last thing I need is gossip spreading about this while I’m still figuring my own feelings out.

She nods. “Yeah I remember. Practically rushed over and scooped you up in his arms before you could get off the mat. Was quite romantic.” I roll my eyes at her.

Our group comes to a stop in front of the gauntlet, Xaden and Garrick making their way over with Emettiro. Both their eyes locked on mine.

I lean closer to her. “He might have confessed he’s essentially been in love with me for years and years despite me being dead and I kind of panicked and ran off and have been avoiding him ever since. Which also means avoiding my brother.”

She shakes her head and chuckles at me. “Girl I could have told you he was in love with you. No one looks at someone the way he does with out being in love.”

I go to reply but Emettiro calls us to start running the gauntlet. And I’m glad Rhiannon and I end up near the front, being one of the first ones to go. Though I doubt Xaden and Garrick are here to try talk to me, as much as they may want to. At the end of the day, they want the wing to do well.

I step up as Rhiannon takes off, my eyes meeting Garrick’s. His face is a mask and I can’t read it at all. I can tell he’s upset though. He’s never like that with me. I’m one of the few he never puts a mask up for. Xaden on the other hand is intently focused on Violet who is behind me. Before I take off up the gauntlet I offer Garrick a quick smile. For a brief second before I take off, his mask falters and his eyes soften as he gives me a tight lipped smile. The entire way up the I feel his eyes following me. He’s yet to see me climb it. And probably won’t tomorrow as most of the leadership wait up top for their squads and wings to pass the gauntlet.

I reach the top with ease. Yet again Melgren’s training had really prepared me for this. I’d barely had any issues getting up the gauntlet in the first day. And most times I caught up to or passed the person in front of me. As much as I didn’t want to think it. I was grateful for his training over the years. I turn around to look down the gauntlet to see both Garrick and briefly Xaden looking up at me. Both look happy with how easily I made it up. Xaden’s gaze drops to something below me. Violet is yet again stuck on the last parts of the gauntlet. And dare I say, does Xaden looks concerned? His eyes shift up to mine. We both know she needs to find an alternate way up the last part of the gauntlet.

Part 9

@riorgail @going-through-shit @fw-gt @bbkissme99 @xceafh

[quin-ns-moved]

Safe House

Word count: 2.3K

Summary: lemon and tangerine break into your safe house, not expecting you to be there. it’s lucky that you are, especially for tangerine

Tags: mentions of blood/violence, flirting/teasing/humor, taking care of tangerine, frenemies to lovers, kinda fluffy, love confessions, kissing, implied smut

A/N: my second tangerine fic <3 this one is very different than my other one but I couldn’t let the idea of patching up tangerine after a job go

Cross-posted to ao3

Edit: check out my new blog with more writing @quin-ns

The last thing you expected was your door crashing open in the middle of the night. Thankfully, it was two familiar faces who came into view despite the darkness.

Lemon and Tangerine. Two associates, well, friends of yours. Yeah, you could call them friends at this point. Anyway, they’d just broken into your house.

“You can’t just burst in and scare me like that!” you scolded the two, clutching your blanket tighter as a gust of cold wind sailed through the room. Tangerine slammed the door shut and locked it, while Lemon hobbled over to the couch where you were seated. You had been in your living room watching a movie, unable to sleep.

Tangerine flicked the main light switch and the bulbs attached to your ceiling fan flickered to life. You took in the sight of both of them, pausing your movie.

Their clothes were a bit tattered and covered in blood that probably wasn’t theirs. Although most of the blood stains weren’t theirs, you could tell both were injured. From the way Lemon fell onto the couch next to you, it seemed like his leg must’ve been messed up and he was clutching his right hand in his left. You glanced at Tangerine and saw a cut on his head, but more concerning there was blood soaking through his sleeve and dripping from his arm.

“What the hell happened to you guys?” you asked aloud, addressing neither one of them in particular.

“Work,” Lemon grunted out first. “Sorry, we didn’t think you’d be here.”

“You didn’t think I’d be in my house?” you asked, brows furrowed a little.

“Your safe house, and yes. You’re never here,” Tangerine chimed in. He had made his way over to the fridge—your living room and kitchen were one in the same—and began to dig through the freezer part. You always kept it well stocked.

“Well I just worked a job and it was easier to come here,” you explained. Although you weren’t really the one who needed to justify their presence.

“We needed a place to lay low,” Lemon revealed. “Thought you’d be gone and wouldn’t mind.”

“You mean you didn’t think I’d notice if you guys were here,” you retorted. They’d tried it before and maybe they thought they were inconspicuous, but given the line of work the three of you shared you noticed the little details.

Tangerine found what he was looking for, which was a frozen bag of peas. You always kept some on hand (even though you hated the taste of peas) because they made a good ice pack. He tossed them to Lemon, who caught them in his non-bruised hand. He placed them over the swelling and his counterpart turned around to face you.

“Since you are here, could we trouble you for some first aid, luv?” Tangerine asked quite politely. Usually you’d give each other a hard time—that was your dynamic, it was harmless—but he needed help and you felt sympathy as you watched him clutch his bleeding arm.

“Yeah, lemme grab my first aid kit.” You stood from the couch, leaving the comfort of your blanket behind. You were still in your pajamas, just a big t-shirt and some shorts. Not a lot of coverage and you were starting to get cold. “Try not to leave blood stains on my floor!” you called once you were down the hall, searching the closest. You couldn’t help yourself.

Tangerine didn’t reply to you, probably muttering something under his breath instead. It didn’t matter, he knew you weren’t serious.

You found the first aid kit and returned. “What’s wrong with who?” you questioned. You were a nurse before you got into your current line of work. Some of what you learned still came in handy every once in a while.

“My hand is all jacked up and I think I twisted my ankle,” Lemon answered first.

“Not much I can do for that other than give you some ice, meds, and tell you to get some rest. If something is broken I can’t do anything here, but I saw you walk in here so for the ankle you should be good in a few days. As for the hand, can you move it?” Lemon tried and succeeded at wiggling his fingers. “Okay good, that’s not broken either. Probably just some bruising but I’ll keep an eye on it.”

“You got two bedrooms in this place, right?” Lemon recalled, starting to pull himself to stand. You handed him a bottle of painkillers which he accepted.

“Last door down the hall on your left,” you directed him as he began to hobble off towards your guest room. You were a little surprised at how fast he made it but you could tell he was mentally and physically exhausted.

Usually, Lemon was talkative and the two of you would chat about anything and everything. Tonight was obviously different, but you were sure you’d catch up with him later.

“You’re amazing, Y/N,” were his parting words (and his thanks) before he closed the guest door behind him.

When it was just you and Tangerine, the two of you met each other’s gaze again. You sat down on your coffee table, facing the couch. “So, you need some bandages for your boo-boos?” you asked teasingly and held up the first aid kit.

Tangerine let out a humorless laugh in response as he made his way to the couch. You opened up the kit and set some contents out beside you on the table. He took his place on the couch across from you. “It’s a little more than a boo-boo,” he replied, holding out his arm and rolling up his sleeve.

His arm was facing palm up and without the bloody sleeve in the way, you could actually see the source of the blood. A diagonal, deep cut across his inner forearm.

“Knife wound?” You laughed at your own question because of the obvious answer. “Never mind, of course it is.”

“Was blocking it from slashing up my face,” he explained. You found some antibacterial wipes and began to clean his arm. “Couldn’t risk losing my best asset.”

You rolled your eyes as he smirked at his own joke. “You’re never going to let that go, are you?”

A few months back you made the mistake of admitting you thought he was attractive. You were fighting beside him and later he had a bruise on the cheek. You’d made a comment about needing to protect his best asset, and Tangerine took it and ran with it. His ego was boosted and while it wasn’t untrue that you thought that, he liked to bring it up as ammunition in your mutual badinage.

“Don’t bet on it,” Tangerine replied. You could feel him staring at you as you cleaned his wound. You glanced up at him briefly and met his eyes.

“I’m gonna have to stitch it,” you told him with a slight frown. His smile faded and he sighed. “I’ll be gentle, I promise.”

“I think you just want a chance to jab me with needles,” Tangerine commented sarcastically, clearly displeased by the situation. He watched as you got the needle ready.

You chuckled at that. “Well, gotta have some fun for me out of this, right?”

The quip was a lie, you didn’t actually want to see him hurt or in pain. While almost every sentence spoken to one another was sardonic or teasing, you considered him your friend and Tangerine did the same. Neither of you ever spoke about it out loud, though. The second one of you admitted you liked the other; it would be considered a loss at the game the two of you played. Sometimes you’d push him or he’d push you, trying to get the truth to be spoken, but so far it was a draw on both ends.

“And here I thought we were friends,” Tangerine argued, feigning offense. This was one of those previously mentioned moments where one of you would begin to push the boundaries.

You smiled to yourself. You couldn’t help it. “Friends, huh?”

Then he said something you didn’t expect.

“Are we not?” he inquired, like he was truly wondering what you thought.

You let him sit with the question for a moment as you pressed the needle into his skin. Tangerine hissed in pain as you created the first stitch.

Finally, you answered. Looking up to him briefly, meeting those blue eyes of his, you said, “yeah, we are.” You meant it,

His words didn’t feel like a win and yours didn’t feel like a loss. Maybe the game you two played was in your heads. There was no harm in admitting out loud that you considered him a friend. Because, well, you did.

“Right,” he murmured. “Okay, good.”

‘Good’. Interesting.

You continued to work, trying to keep focus. Tangerine stared at you as you closed up the wound. Neither of you spoke and he tried to remain still for you.

When the wound was fully closed and you cut the string, you let out a sign of relief. “And… done!”

Tangerine released the breath he was holding. “Thank fucking god. I hate needles.” He examined his arm before allowing it to fall.

“Really? I didn’t know that.”

“Doesn’t everyone?” he countered.

“Fair point,” you conceded. You glanced at the cut on his forehead. “So how’d you get that?”

He knew what you meant. “Got whacked by a gun. It’s not bad. Certainly not as bad as the knife could’ve been.”

“You’re right.” Your fingers brushed through his disheveled brunette hair, pushing the curls away from his forehead with one hand. You cleaned the dried blood away from the cut with the other. “It won’t scar or anything,” you confirmed. Your free hand trailed down to his cheek and you patted it lightly. “That pretty face of yours is safe.”

Your tone was teasing but your touch was soft when your hand stilled. It lingered for a moment and Tangerine absentmindedly leaned into the touch, relaxing. His eyes remained on you, watching your face while you focused on tending to the cut. When you pulled both of your hands away, the expression on his face changed slightly. Like he was disappointed at the loss of contact.

“Don’t think I didn’t notice that,” you commented, looking down at your hands as you tore open the bandaid.

“Notice what?” he asked as you placed the bandaid on his cut forehead.

“You, going all soft for a minute,” you relayed with a faint smirk. ”Admit it.”

Tangerine let out a dramatic sigh of defeat. “Fine. You win.”

He gave in faster than you thought he would’ve. “Wait, really?” You furrowed your brows in skepticism.

“It’s… nice,” he said slowly, building up to the admission. “I mean, when you look after me like that. Helping me out, being all gentle… I don’t know.” Tangerine swallowed. It was the first time in maybe forever you’d seen him look nervous, maybe even embarrassed. Your expression softened. “It feels like you care and I like that.” He wasn’t used to being this open and you certainly weren’t either.

“It feels like that because I do,” you revealed, meeting his eyes. There was a softness in his as he looked at you, but also a hint of anxiety that was replaced by relief as he scanned your face.

You meant what you said just like he had.

You couldn’t stop yourself from cracking a joke to fill the silence. It was practically an instinct. “Admitting we’re friends and that we care… big day, huh?”

Tangerine scoffed out a laugh. “I’m glad Lemon’s not out here, he’d never let this go.”

“Why’s that?”

“He has this idea—stupid idea, really—in his head about us.” He rubbed his hand over the lower half of his face and averted his eyes for a moment.

You weren’t going to let that be so quickly glossed over. “Oh?”

Tangerine gave in and began to explain without protest. “He thinks the reason you and I give each other such a hard time is because we have feelings for each other,” he divulged almost cautiously. He tried to not stare at you as he attempted to gauge your reaction.

“Hmm,” you hummed, catching onto where this was going. And once you were on the same page as him, the tone in the room changed. “Is he right?“

Tangerine simpered, gazing at you longingly. “I like to think so.”

And there it was. He’d made the first move.

It was a long time coming and if you were being wholly and completely honest, you’d been waiting.

“Really?”

“You don’t believe me?”

“I don’t know, you might have to convince me.” You turned on the charm and it was well received.

His eyebrow quirked up, intrigued. “Is that so?” Tangerine’s hand extended towards you, facing palm up. You placed your hand in his, allowing him to pull you forward.

You lifted off the table across from him only for him to guide you into his lap. You let out a small laugh, draping your arms over his shoulders. You came face to face with him, suddenly aware of the positive you were in.

“Hi,” you said coyly.

“Hello, luv,” he replied, a devilish smile appearing on his face.

Before you could even think of something to say, Tangerine's hand was on the back of your neck and pulling you towards him. His lips collided with yours and you happily melted into the kiss. His lips were surprisingly soft and moved perfectly in tandem with yours, yet he was still dominant. You expected he would be—although you’d never admit you wondered what it would be like to kiss him.

The kiss was full of passion, all the pent up emotions and hidden feelings finally coming out. It was hot and heavy and everything you thought it would be.

You parted from him long enough to suggest, “we could go to my bedroom.”

Suddenly, Tangerine stood and took you with him. You gasped as you were lifted into the air. His arms locked under your thighs as you wrapped your legs around his waist. You were at eye level with him and the lustful look on his face was one you’d keep in your mind forever.

Tangerine grinned at your suggestion. “I like the sound of that.”

[cerridwen007]

Scarlet Snowball.

pics above from pinterest used for aesthetic purposes only*

Pairing: Vampire!Joel Miller x f!reader (afab)

Word count: 1.2 k (18+) MINORS DNI!

Summary: You're on your knees for Joel when things get a little messy….not that Joel minds.

Notes/Warnings: SMUT, BLOOD, PWP, Nosebleeds, descriptions of sneezing/nosebleeds, blood drinking, cumplay, oral (m + f receiving), fingering, kissing, swearing, no y/n, sappy fluffy ending.

A/N: Hi yall, it's been a minute since i've posted any sort of writing, over 2 months, in fact. Many reasons why that is, I had a bit of a depressive episode november- december, that wasn't fun and then I sort of just had enough with feeling shitty and got my hours reduced at work, did things I had been putting off and planned a whole bunch of fun things. So yeah, this last month has been busy and eventful but good. I didn't do a whole lot of writing during that time, but I've finally gained some more time and motivation, so I'm hoping to get back into posting more regularly. Um, I may have come up with this at work cause I was late with a nose bleed…possibly. This is probably the freakiest thing i've written, and I kinda love it, so I’d say look out for more of these kinda fics in the future. Also, shout out to @toxicanonymity and @lincolndjarin whose fics i've been loving lately, and their darker themes in their writing definitely have inspired me to try my hand at it. Any interactions with my posts are always welcome and appreciated. Hope y'all have a great day. Love you! ❤️

************

“Ah…fuck baby. Just like that. Fuck…… just like that.” Joel groans above you as your lips stretch to fit around his beautifully tanned and veiny girth.

You continually bob your head up and down his salty skin, humming at his deliciously musky taste. You're not in any rush to make him cum. Instead playing around with different paces, building him up hard and fast only to slow down when he nears his peak. He’s gradually become more of a whiney, mess as you work your magic on him. Your hands are always keeping occupied, either playing with his balls or stroking what of his length isn't in your mouth. His own hands gently caress your hair, ensuring it doesn't get in your face.

Suddenly, a horrible but familiar feeling graces your senses, a ticklish sensation building behind your nose. You quickly pull off Joel's still aching cock and sneeze, trying your best to keep your mouth closed. 

Joel brows instantly knit in concern. “Bless you, sweetheart. You're alright? You know you shouldn’t hold in ya sneezes. it's bad for ya.”

“Yeah it's just allergi-”you respond before sneezing once again, only this time you don't hold it in. But luckily managing to miss Joel with your projectile germs. Your closed eyes squint together for a bit as the sensation fades before opening them in horror to a crimson mess of splattered blood, speckled all over Joel’s cock and thighs. 

He looks down at your mess with blown eyes before meeting your gaze. You stare back at him with wide eyes filled with shock, which seem to finish him off as he begins shooting large white ropes of cum on your now blood stained face. Still in a confused haze you take a second before quickly reattaching your lips back onto the tip of his cock, not wanting to waste another drop of his liquid gold. A symphony of louder than usual groans and whines spill from Joel’s lips, blessing your ears as an irony, salty flavour floods your taste buds. Your nose still dripping with a crimson river, starts to travel past your chin down your neck and collarbone. Yet you sit obediently, taking everything he has to give, a perfect picture of a lover devoted to sharing their blood and soul for the pleasure of the one they love. 

Your brows screw together with concentration. You, not exactly, loving the taste of blood, just hold all of the swirling red and white fluids into your mouth till Joel finishes. He lets out a growl, one of pure lust, almost inhuman. As he lets his eyes hungrily take in the stunning sight of you, baring all, on your knees before him, as your blood drips all over your curves. He nearly cums again just from the sight. You only just now think to put your hand up to your nose to try and stop the bleeding, only to have Joel quickly grip your hand and harshly pull it away before hoisting you up to full height. He bares his teeth like a predator as his head lowers inches away from your’s. His chest rises and falls as he breathes in deep, the scent of your life force.

Joel’s lips crash onto yours, his grip on you only intensifying, as if the moment he lets go, you'll disappear. He licks deeply into your mouth, capturing your combined flavors onto his own tongue. A moan of appreciation is shared between the two of you as you melt into each other's mouths. His large hands grip your arms with such force, and you're sure to bruise within the hour. He devours you with such intensity, like he needs you to survive, which he does. You manage to pull back much to Joel's annoyance when your head starts to feel light. He takes the opportunity to lick his lips and revel in the taste of you. 

“So damn sweet for me, baby.” He purrs as he dips his head back down to now start licking up the drying blood staining your neck and chest. 

You moan as his tongue cleans the dripping vermillion from your chest. He pauses now and then to suck the skin into his mouth and softly bite it, marking you, his favourite treat. Your hand flys up to grip onto his dark curls, threading your stained fingers through the fluffy tangles. He consumes every inch of your skin covered in your bloody mess. Vibrations run atop of your skin from his hums and moans creating goosebumps, a clear sign of Joel enjoying himself. You whine when you feel his once again erect cock rub glistening drops of precome against your thigh. You latch your hand onto him and begin stroking, he bites harshly into your breast, pleasure surging through his veins.

“Always make me feel so good darling.” Joel moans against your skin, his tongue licks, soothing the marks he just made in your flesh. He works faster to clear the cherry coloured stains from your skin, getting closer and closer to where you're throbbing for him. Your hand releases his cock as the need to come yourself makes your head grow fuzzy.

“Joel please…please.” You beg him, not giving any specifics but Joel knows what you're asking of him.

He smiles up at you with a devilish grin before, fully sinking to his knees and grabbing your left thigh to place it upon his shoulder. He wastes not a single second before he starts devouring his second favorite substance in the world (second only to your sweet, sweet blood). His strong tongue delves between your glistening folds. You can't help but grind yourself on his nose, your clit being perfectly stimulated by his hawkish feature. 

“Shit Joel…fuck. You make me feel so good.” You whine, as his tongue licks hard over your clit.

He pushes the remainder of the pinkish fluids he had secretly held in his mouth into your dripping cunt with his tongue. He then inserts his two middle fingers into you to fuck it deeper. The pressure of his thick fingers thrusting in and out of you and his wet lips curled around your clit, has you quickly reaching your peak. Your vision is lined with stars as Joel works you through your peak. Your nails bite into his skin on his shoulders, leaving small red marks as the pleasure seizes hold over your entire body and mind. 

“Atta girl, just like that, wanna taste you over and over again.” Joel keens from between your legs. 

The room fills with squelching sounds, and your desperate moans and pleads grow more inherent as you grow overstimulated. Your knees shake and wobble as you try and gently push his head away when it becomes too much. He relents after placing a few lingering kisses to your pussy before standing, pulling your body close to his, ensuring you have some stability while you recover.

Your racing heart slows as you find comfort in the arms of your lover. You look up at him and place a soft lingering kiss to his reddened lips. He kisses you back gently before leaving a kiss upon the crown of your head. You rest your head upon his chest when Joel suddenly picks you up bridal style and carries you to the bathroom to get cleaned up. 

“I love you, Joel, with all my life.”

“I love you too, baby, forever, my love.”

***************

[gremoria411]

Zeon Remnants: Why so many?

*Spoilers for most of the Universal Century Below*

So a common criticism of Universal Century I see is that it’s essentially all Zeon Remnants, all the time. That it every antagonist to the Earth Federation is either a Zeon remnant or related to such and it makes the universal century feel smaller.

That is 100% a valid criticism.

However, it’s not something I particularly notice as a problem, so I figured I’d make a post delving into my reasons why. I’ll be talking about each of the “main” Zeon groups (The Principality of Zeon, The Delaz Fleet, Axis Zeon, Char’s Neo Zeon and The Sleeves) and I’ll talk about why Zeon are so frequently the antagonist. Alright, enough preamble, let’s get on with it.

Why don’t I have a problem with Zeon always showing up, all the time?

Because I usually consider each Zeon group its own thing. Like, yeah the aesthetics and some mobile suits tend to match up but they typically have…. If not different goals, then different cultures. It’s not just the same thing all the time.

I’ll be dividing them by roughly four factors:

Motivations - *Why* are they fighting, how unified are they?

Size - big force or little force, since it affects how they fight.

Newtypes - Oh hey, it’s just possibly one of their more important contributions to the setting in general. Kinda important. Focusing more on how they’re used and how they’re seen.

Mechanics - Mobile suits and overall tech level for the time.

The Principality of Zeon

First up, the good ol’ Principality of Zeon. The P of Z, if you will. Founded by Degwin Sodo Zabi in the aftermath of Zeon Zum Deikun’s death in U.C. 0068. Rapid Militarisation of Side 3 (Munzo), the colonies composing Zeon followed, with what would become the One Year War being declared in UC 0079. It’s sometimes known as “The Duchy of Zion” in older translations.

It’s a little unclear *why* war was declared, but the official line and the view of the average citizen would be that it was a war of Independence from the Earth Federation. Zeon Zum Deikun (who Zeon was named after) was the father of Contolism, a philosophy that combines two major elements:

Elseim - The Earth is Sacred, and must be protected (The Earth is Humanity’s Cradle, but man cannot live in the cradle forever-type stuff, with a big focus on environmentalism).

Sideism - All Space Colonies should be independent from the Earth Federation (This is where all the “Those whose souls are still bound by gravity”-type stuff comes from).

And nestled riiight in the middle of those two is the Newtype Theory, which postulates that ascending into space is the next stage of mankind’s evolution, giving rise to a “new type” of individual, with the ability to communicate over great distances and divides.

Due to Class divides and economic disparity between the Earth Federation “elite” and the Space Colonists (particularly those in Side 3), Contolism was massively popular, with Zeon Zum Deikun being raised to leader of Side 3. However, he died suddenly and (apparently) appointed Degwin Zabi as his successor. Degwin would instigate a purge of Zeon’s most loyal followers, and place his children in high ranking political positions, ruling the Principality of Zeon as absolute dictator. It’s unclear if Degwin declared war as the logical conclusion of the Contolism Philosophy to wrest Earth from the Federation, if he viewed it as a way to secure greater power or if he genuinely wanted to rule the entire earth sphere.

What I’m getting at here is that your average Zeon soldier believes he is fighting for the Independence of the Space Colonies and the safeguarding of Earth against the Federation Elites who seek to exploit it. The higher command however, is incredibly fractious, since each one is operating under a different member of the Zabi Family, and so there tends to be a lot of friction. Even if Zeon had won the OYW, it’s likely it would’ve had to deal with a Civil War at some point or another (dependant on which members of the Zabi family survived).

Zeon is also notable in that it’s the single largest organisation here, and since mobile suit combat was relatively new, it fought with a lot more variety than any of its successors, such as tanks and mobile armours. It also had the advantage of, with the notable exception of the RX-78 and its derivatives, being far better off than the Earth Federation technologically, possessing advanced mobile suits and actual Newtype research (important note; With one singular exception, it is never suggested that Zeon’s Newtype laboratories are anything less than above-board. Are they under immense pressure to succeed? Absolutely. But crucially, they aren’t inhuman). It had a large variety of mobile suits - usually a few good “workhorse” units (Zaku’s and Dom’s) with a bunch of oddities on the side (like Gyan’s and Zakarello’s).

Lastly, the One Year War itself. This is a point I’ll be coming back to frequently throughout this, but; The Federation possessed a major population and material advantage over the Principality of Zeon for the entire war, and was able to deploy a staggering amount of enlisted soldiers into the war. Zeon possessed the advantage of mobile suits early on, but they were also forced to mobilise a great many soldiers. Both Sides of the One Year War lost half of their respective populations in the early stages of the war (The One Week Battle) and Side 4 Moore was utterly devastated. What I’m getting at is that there would be an awful lot of individuals with millitary training and/or technological know-how running around after the war, as occurred in the real-world World War II and Cold War (strictly speaking I’m looking at them being an easy source of millitary experience in genre fiction, but you get the idea). So you have a lot of Ex-Soldiers and remaining military equipment hanging around, and a lot of people with “legitimate grievances” to hate the other side (Warcrimes on both sides, The Earth Federation essentially doesn’t change, Zeon Remnants remain an active problem with several becoming pirates and there’s a lot of Federation “mop-up” teams going around, the precursors to the Titans).

So, The Principality of Zeon in a nutshell; Principled reasoning (i.e. Contolism), massive force, Newtypes rare and incredibly valued (since they’re essentially a living reminder of why they’re fighting and a massive force multiplier), mobile suits essentially brand new and largely experimental.

The Delaz Fleet (and Zeon Remnants in general)

The Delaz Fleet was formally created in U.C. 0081, being primarily composed of former Gihren Zabi Loyalists from the Principality of Zeon, led by Aigulle Delaz (above, left). They were most famous for Operation Stardust in U.C. 0083. I’m also going to be discussing Zeon Remnant groups in general here, since the Delaz Fleet is essentially just a very large and successful Zeon remnant group. Delaz’ goal is relatively simple - vengeance. Delaz wishes to deal a hefty blow to the federation, largely to avenge the Principality’s loss at a Baoa Qu, with much of his forces feeling similarly (note: it’s possible that, had their been less withdrawals of Gihren Faction Loyalists like Delaz, A Baoa Qu may have gone differently). The forces under his command is relatively small, to the point where he is forced to seek aid from both the Axis Advance Fleet (though this is largely in materials and recovery) and the Cima Fleet, which costs him dearly.

Delaz specifically embellishes the “cause” of Zeon, focusing less on the Principality’s totally necessary warcrimes and more on Zeon’s fight for Independence against the Earth Federation. This is relevant because Delaz reaches a wide audience, espousing his own Zeonic ideals, largely divorced from the original Contolism basis. He also blames the weakened political leadership of the time (read: that nasty Kycilia murdering his precious Gihren Zabi). Delaz is specifically the most successful of the Zeon remnants in his era, directly to the space colonies detriment, since his actions directly lead to the founding of the Titans, who brutally crack down on the Colonies.

Equipment-wise, Zeon remnant groups are a varied bunch, but typically fight using older or ad-hoc equipment - The Delaz Fleet primarily utilises upgraded machines from the One Year War - Zaku FII’s, Rick Dom’s and, most notably, Dra-C’s - mobile suits cobbled together from spare Zaku and Gattle fighter-bomber parts. Any other materials they use are either stolen from the Earth Federation or are acquired through other means.

Newtypes are kinda weird here, since there just aren’t any in 0083, and the general theme with Newtypes in other remnant groups around this time is typically that they’re either propaganda or just not very good. It’s possible that the Newtype philosophy was largely dormant for a while immediately following Zeon’s defeat - either viewed as propaganda or directly suppressed by the Earth Federation themselves (like Amuro). The Newtype philosophy likely experienced as resurgence with the emergence of the Titans, since it would have been a rallying cry for spacenoid independence once more. As such, Newtypes just aren’t a big thing in Zeon remnant groups around this era, at least as near as I can tell (Delaz is the only animated force we see, and I try not to rely too much on manga, at least for Universal Century).

So, Delaz Fleet (and immediate postwar Zeon remnants) in a nutshell; Varied Motivations (though typically vengeance or survival), Small Guerilla Force, Newtypes near non-existent, mobile suits either OYW cast-offs or stolen.

Axis Zeon

Which I admit I’m using because it’s more easily distinguished than Neo Zeon, Neo Zeon and Neo Zeon. Anyway, Axis Zeon is made up of the various Zeon remnants that fled to the Asteroid Axis after the One Year War, this includes several pilots, scientists and engineers, which ensures that Axis enjoys a massive technological edge for most of its existence. Axis, in contrast to Zeons prior, is primarily concerned with “The Restoration of the Zabi Family” since one of the people that ended up there is Mineva Zabi, daughter of Dozle and the Zabi family’s only living heir. Except Glemy maybe.

Since Mineva was of the Zabi family lineage, of course she’d want to resume their conquest of the Earth Sphere, and so Axis was reconstructed into a fortress for her to rule when she came of age, with a regent being appointed to rule in her stead, which eventually fell to Haman Karn. Haman was essentially able to use Mineva as a figurehead in order to mount an invasion of Earth, and struck at the end of the Gryps War, when both the Titans and AEUG were reeling from that conflict. It’s also notable that a lot of the Axis members we see are very young, so were raised on “The Glories of Zeon” without actually seeing the realities of the One Year War with their own eyes.

Neo Zeon also was able to develop and field newtype weaponry, with newtypes being a potent threat against the AEUG. However, they still weren’t common, and so Cyber Newtypes were fielded. In contrast to “true newtypes” who have naturally awakened to their powers, cyber-newtypes are those with Newtype potential who have been forcibly conditioned with drugs and implants in order to function for combat. Though deadly threats, they are very unstable. You may notice that this seems anathema to the Contolism Philosophy espoused by Zeon Zum Deikun, and is incredibly dehumanising to boot, signifying that Axis is barely even paying lip service to its ideals of spacenoid independence. Axis Zeon is also notable for utilising clones to supplement its Newtype forces, which…. I don’t think is strictly counter to Contolism? But it feels like it’s against it in spirit, if not in letter.

It’s especially notable that a great many members of Axis Zeon espouse things like “For the Glory of Neo Zeon” and “For the Restoration of the Zabi Family” without really understanding what they mean. It’s also notable that, barring links with surviving Zeon Remnant groups, Axis isn’t noted as being very popular with the colonial population, likely because they don’t really understand what the “Ideals of Zeon” mean, and the civilians recognise them as merely parroting Zabi rhetoric.

Axis Zeon would eventually be undone by a Civil War within the organisation led by Glemy Toto, coupled with the AEUG’s offensives. Unlike the political manoeuvring of the One Year War, the Glemy Faction coup occurs very suddenly and results in massive casualties in the organisation due to his command of the Newtype corps.

Technologically, Axis is absolutely cutting-edge. They really don’t cheap out on mobile suit development and are able to design and field a variety of units comparable to the Principality in its heyday. Axis forces are essentially the best-armed Zeon will ever be, helped massively by the sheer amount of Newtype weaponry they can deploy (they have three mainline mobile suits in the Neo Zeon War, all three seeing good amounts of production at various stages and they’re typically first pick for Zeon Remnant Groups in the U.C. 0090’s). They also have the facilities for Newtype cloning, as mentioned above.

Axis Zeon in a nutshell; Hollow Motivations (Restoration of the Zabi Family and Conquest of the Earth Sphere), large force, newtypes and cyber-newtypes prevalent, mobile suits many, varied and cutting-edge.

(I haven’t quite finished all of ZZ, so forgive me if this one’s a bit rough)

Char’s Neo Zeon/Newborn Neo Zeon

Sometimes also known as Char’s Rebellion. It was basically founded in order to accelerate space migration….. by plunging the Earth into nuclear winter and making it near-uninhabitable. Founded by our good buddy Char Aznable in U.C. 0093, there’s less to go on for this particular iteration of Zeon, basically just a movie and supplemental information. It is composed of various Zeon remnants and political factions under Char Aznable with the express purpose of instigating the Axis Drop in order to make the earth uninhabitable and stop humanity from damaging it. Which is a terrible plan, barely paying lip service to the Contolist ideals Zeon was founded upon.

That’s because it’s a lie.

Char is in fact mounting a suicide run on the entire Earth. Creating a threat so massive that Amuro will be forced to kill him to stop it. Which is rather informative. Char is essentially using his influence to hold the entire operation together, and it’s notable that a good chunk of his own forces actively move to counter his goal when the option presents itself. Consequently, there isn’t much in the way of ideals on display here - Char is famous both for being the son of Zeon Zum Deikun and for his Dakar Address when he was a member of the AEUG. It kinda seems like a lot of his support is coming from people who know him from that, as opposed to what he’s actually doing. Newborn Neo Zeon is basically headlined and held together by Char, and has the vibe of a desperate last gasp for Zeon. It’s also notable that the only time we see Char actually lead Zeon is when he’s using its name for his own ends.

Newborn Neo Zeon also has a great more political pull than many of the other groups - Char Succeeds in a lot of his goals because he’s essentially able to play the Earth Federation like a fiddle, while remnant groups happily provide him aid. Technologically he has the backing of both Anaheim and Newtype Labs. Char’s mobile suits are, while not cutting-edge as such, very well rounded. The Geara Doga and Jagd Doga both share components and a general body structure, and the only reason the Sazabi is unique is because they couldn’t make the frame suit Char’s abilities (there’s a bunch of prototype units that pave the way to the Sazabi). Newborn Neo Zeon also retains a number of Axis Zeon Remnants, which bring their mobile suits and technical skill as well. Newtypes, while not exactly common, are considerably more stable than their Axis predecessors, and are given Jagd Doga’s, which are probably the closest a Newtype machine has ever come to reliability and ease of use. There’s also the Alpha Azieru…. which is also there (I don’t really have a lot to say on it honestly, it’s just kind of another “big newtype weapon”). Unfortunately, I really don’t have much to go on here regarding how the force views its newtypes - they’re essentially just treated as a special branch of the forces, no contolist ethics here, which is genuinely pretty sad. Because it illustrates just how far Char’s fallen from the ideals he espoused at the end of Zeta, especially considering he’s the son of Zeon Zum Deikun.

Char’s Neo Zeon in a nutshell: Motivations lean Char-centric, middling force with a lot of soft power, Newtypes present and mostly stable, small mobile suit variety but what’s there is very good.

(The Geara Doga’s one of my favourite grunt suits, so I’m probably quite biased here)

The Sleeves

Last of the “main” Neo Zeon Organisations. The Sleeves is a melting pot of every Zeon remnant group going. Founded around U.C. 0096, they were led by the man called Full Frontal, known as the “ghost of char”. Due to their disparate status, they aren’t recognised as a legitimate organisation by the Federstion, instead being branded a terrorist group - which they essentially are, being an aggregation of a bunch of other informal Zeon remnant groups. This mixed nature leads to a similar diversity in views and equipment - you have die-hard contolists, Glemy faction remnants, newborn Neo Zeon cast-offs and everything in-between.

They are essentially a return to form for Zeon Remnant groups, but are able effectively leverage their limited assets to fight quite effectively, though again, they’re heavily reliant on soft power, such as their relationship with Anaheim and political connections. They don’t have the forces to steamroll through the Earth Federation, so they’re forced to adopt an almost cell-based approach (at least that’s my read on Full Frontal and Suberoa Zinnerman’s relationship). It’s an odd mix of the realities of a Guerilla war against the federation and hearkening back to Neo-Zeon groups past (who were themselves hearkening back to the days of the old Principality). I should also note that The Sleeves maintain links with several other Zeon Remnant groups, such as some of the forces that attack Torrington in Unicorn. This is interesting not just because it shows a greater deal of collaboration between these groups than seen prior (Delaz and Cima were not exactly trusting of each other), it also shows a different mechanical composition to pre-U.C. 0090 remnant groups.

They’re kind of all over the place. Which I love because it’s 1:1 with their philosophical composition - they’re remnants from a bunch of different forces and groups, so of course it makes sense that their mobile suits would reflect that. The Sleeves do possess the…. Not-quite-cutting-edge-but-at-least-new Geara Zulus and the absolutely fabulous Sinanju (s), Kyshatriya and Rebawoo, but that’s kind of all they’re at. Everything else is from at least Char’s Rebellion or earlier - there’s one-of-a-kind custom units, old axis castoffs, even some stuff from the One Year War and immediate postwar period (like that poor regelgu). A varied armament for a varied force.

However, it is notable that The Sleeves don’t really have much of an identity of their own, largely due to their patchwork composition. They’re the scattered remnants of previous causes, and this is both called out and used against them in-universe. It feels like an examination of Char’s actions during CCA - Full Frontal certainly has Char’s charisma, but he doesn’t have his drive as evidenced by his eventual goal, which isn’t necessarily a *bad* aim, it’s just not Char.

Following on from this they share Newborn Neo Zeon’s just general…. disinterest in newtypes. They’re like any other pilot, they can just use different equipment. All the Sleeves Newtypes we see are very well-equipped though, so how they precisely look at them is unclear. This could be viewed as another extension of Char’s attitudes in CCA.

The Sleeves in a nutshell: Motivations are kind of all over the place, middling-to-low-sized force, newtypes uncommon but mostly-stable (one exception) and very effective, massive mobile suit variety but quality’s also all over the place.

Conclusion

So yeah, I find each revival of Zeon different enough that I can consider them separately to each other - yeah, there’s crossover, but their attitudes change each time - the only thing that stays the same is the aesthetic and who they’re fighting against.

But why are Zeon so often the antagonist?

Out-of-universe, because they sell. But you already knew that so let’s talk about possible In-universe reasons:

Old Equipment - The Principality was *huge*. Masses of equipment, enlisted men and yes, mobile suits. We see several individuals that are able to survive on the Scrap alone - Kelly Layzner, Judau Ashta, even the AEUG utilize a Gelgoog at one point. There’s a lot of material out there, and its a hot commodity post war and the Earth Federation will be in a hurry to rebuild - they don’t have the resources to track down every case of assault rifles or damaged-but-not-irreparable mobile suit. The South Seas alliance in Gundam Thunderbolt is one such organisation, but there will be a lot of Zeon Remnants who are still functional.

Loss of Leadership, not force - Aguille Delaz personally blames the “weak political leadership” (IE Kycillia) for the loss in the One Year War, but we can extrapolate that further. The Battle for A Baoa Qu saw pretty much all the remaining Zabi High Command due within hours of each other - Gihren kills Degwin, Kycillia kills Gihren, Char kills Kycillia. These are three massive losses to the war effort in very short spaces of time. Gihren’s betrayal of Degwin would’ve been very costly for him even if Kycillia hadn’t taken revenge there and then. He deprived himself of both the Solar Ray and the Fleet that Degwin was part of. The fact he took out Revil as well merely would’ve made it an even loss - if it wasn’t for the Solar Ray being rendered unusable into the bargain. Kycilia’s revenge killing of Gihren deprives A Baoa Qu of forces as the commanders loyal to Gihren flee the scene - Delaz among them - weakening the defence overall. Finally, Kycilia is killed as she is attempting to flee to Granada, where she planned to continue the war. This leaves a great many well-armed forces at large, since their strength wasn’t spent at A Baoa Qu - forces that Axis Zeon will draw on. All it really takes to galvanise these remnants is a charismatic individual, something which isn’t exactly in sort supply in the Universal Century.

Corollary to the above - Unclear loss - A Baoa Qu was absolute chaos, so the precise mechanics of “why Zeon lost” might be difficult for the average soldier to grasp - particularly one lacking in reliable non-federation communication sources. It would be easy to look at the mess of A Baoa Qu, then look at the equipment beside you and think “Yeah, we could’ve won. Yeah, we might still win”.

Unchanged Status Quo - Zeon launched the One Year War, at least officially, in the name of Independence. The Earth Federation was governing the colonies poorly, and class inequality was high. This does not change, if anything, it gets worse, as groups like the Titans see the OYW and Operation Stardust as Carte Blanche to utterly suppress the space colonies, and carry out War Crimes at least equal to Zeon’s. A failed war might at least spark some change to prevent another one, but if anything conditions for spacenoids only get worse, so resistance groups would see an upturn in numbers.

Corollary to the Above - Spacenoid Independence doesn’t stop with the war - The Independence of the Space Colonies is still a hot-button issue which the Federation has reason to suppress. So any ex-Zeon soldiers that folded back into civilian life may get involved with Colonial Independence movements. Or, any colonial independence movement that finds the Federation isn’t listening to them might seek a way to *make* them listen - and might find Zeon Remnant Groups sympathetic to their cause.

Little oversight - Before the formation of the Titans, the Earth Federation government believed Zeon to be removed as a threat - small pirate groups, but nothing major. Operation Stardust changed all this, yes, but before that Zeon remnant groups could operate largely unopposed, especially in areas with lower federation presence.

Total Societal Upheavel - Half of the population of the Universal Century died in the One Week Battle. Side 4 Moore was completely destroyed. There’s going to be some serious societal reconstruction after that no matter how you look at it. (Sidebar - Polygamy is mentioned as being a lot more common in Gundam Thunderbolt after the OYW, due to the massive gender disparity - you could also read this as Universal Century also being supportive of Lesbians). It’s not necessarily a driving force behind Zeon Remnant groups, but it’s worth remembering.

Military Experience - The big one, in my opinion. You have a lot of individuals with military experience after the war, including Guerilla warfare. This includes all the forces that had to adapt to new environments, like fighting in space, in colonies or on earth. There’s also a massive postwar economic depression. That’s not going to breed contentment towards a weak government, especially one that wasn’t doing a good job before the war.

In a nutshell, Zeon has the experience, materials and drive necessary to continue being a problem after the One Year War, and the Earth Federation Government doesn’t have the institutional will to stop them until Operation Stardust, which leads to the creation of the Titans, which really don’t help the situation.

Feel free to mention anything I’ve missed!

[sun-stricken]

Headcannoms about friendship between Bickslow and Gray? I like to think after the fighting festival he really tries to make it up to Gray.

Gray: ‘we’re chill. It’s fine.’

Bickslow: ‘my babies will now perform a dance of apology’

Also a scenario I’d like to share!

Lucy: hey, Gray I picked up your mail. Why do you have a letter from a modelling agency?

Gray: oh that. I don’t know they just keep sending me them even though I’ve told them no.

Lucy: you’ve turned them down repeatedly?! *while crying inside*

Gray: yeah? It’s weird ‘cause I didn’t even apply.

Lucy: Lucy kick!

i for some reason hadn’t considered the idea of them having a close friendship, but i am now so here! a gift !

i had so much fun with this

* my personal hc is that Bickslows dolls feel a lot of what he himself feels, and also theyre kinda like birds

* so they too try to make it up to Gray, they bring him little things they find, such as shiny rocks, pins, and other tiny objects they find

* Bickslow just nods in approval from the sidelines when they bring them to Gray

* They were both fairly awkward with each other post festival but after Bickslow gave Gray an honest apology they began to turn over a new leaf

* people find the friendship strange tbh, Gray is known as this vaguely calm and like, super normal guy, and Bickslow is just— not

* theyre surprisingly comfortable with each other

* they dont hang out a lot outside the guild, but thats not to say they dont ever,

* While they dont work the best together and it took a while be able to fight along side on another,

* If the Thunder Legion and Team Natsu have to pair up usually they do bc they’re comfortable with each other and trust can go a long way

* theyre both texting fiends, like its a problem how much they message their friends, so when they found out the other was the same oh my god was it a train wreck

* their conversations can go for hours and if you read through them youd probably have an aneurysm because the topics make no sense and Bix doesn’t even try to spell correctly

* They have gotten close and friendly but that doesnt mean theu ever know what to expect from the other, their opinions and thoughts are so different from each other, if rhey ever have the same idea its like all the stars and planet’s have aligned and world is about to end

* Bickslows hair is naturally black and Gray helped him dye it once and they deadass looked they walk out the smurf set for weeks, Bix’s bathroom looked like they murdered a hundred of them

* Gray has an affinity for collecting hand weapons (swords, spears, bows, etc) while Bickslow likes taking apart and building old bombs (actual explosive grenades, land mines, smoke/flash grenades)

* they bonded over it and talked about it in public and terrified about 20 people rhat were in earshot

* theyre both a big hit with kids

* Bickslow gets added to the long list of people who barge into Gray house unannounced

* a lot of the time they will talk (coughcomplaincough) about two different things in the same convo

* Bickslow: the cops were at my door again last night because of the inactive grenade i threw in the fountain, woke me up and everything

* Gray: ugh, i hate that, Natsu blew up a building again and Erza yelled at the both of us

* Bickslow: thats so rude, do you think i should make another one and send it to them?

* Gray: totally, she knew it wasnt me but i still got scolded

so happy ppl have realized how pretty Gray is, now we’re gonna talk abt it bc im an overachiever

* Hes been scouted by plenty of different modeling agencies over the years, which really boosted his ego but very quickly became annoying as hell bc he never even applied

* He gets a couple a month, and he accepted once just to get them off his back and found it really embarrassing bc he was everywhere

* his friends in and outside the guild bought the magazines he was featured in and teased him mercilessly and he never stepped foot in another agency ever again

* Hes really photogenic but hates gets his photo taken, most of the pictures hes in ‘willingly’ hes glaring at the camera

* he now just blocks the numbers they call him on and throws out the letter they send him, if they stop him on the street he will walk away before the conversation even starts

* when Lucy found out something inside her died a little

* she pestered him about it and said she’ll go with him! he wont even have to take the money for it! she’ll take it! 😁

* she gets shot down every time but that doesnt mean she quit trying

[heavendear32]

Something There — B.c

Pairing: BangChan X female reader

Summary: you have been friends with Chan since you were kids, always been there through thick and thin and you love him (as more than a friend) but Chan never noticed. When Chan gets a new job, your feelings and relationship with Chan are on the line.

Genre: angst, fluff, friends to lovers, kinda a slow-burn

Warnings: angst, fluff at the end, Lee know and Hyunjin are mentioned in this, mentions of death (lee know makes a joke about cigarettes k!lling him), cigarettes, Lee know and reader share a cigarette, crying, unrequite love in the beginning, Chan is oblivious to reader’s flirting/feelings.

Note: I have been working on Eros radio, this week is finals so I’m super busy but I will be posting Eros radio again and also this is my first skz fic so I hope you guys enjoy it:)

If soulmates were real, you were sure it was Chan. He had always been there since you were kids, through every heartbreak and achievement. You couldn’t complain, you loved Chan and he was the best friend you could ever have but you always felt like there was more in between you and him. Small actions and lingering touches told you different then what Chan said.

“I just feel like I’m not appreciated there.” You complained to Chan

“Then you should quit, and they’d realize that they lost their best employee.” Chan replied shrugging

“Chan, I know that you quit your last job and immediately got hired again but it doesn’t work for all of us.” You rolled your eyes. Chan laughed and wrapped his arm around your shoulder. “Well I’ll walk down there, bust into your boss’s room and say ‘listen here, Y/n is an amazing hardworking woman and I’ll be damned if you don’t treat her with the level of respect she deserves’”

You laughed as Chan talked, he always seemed to know what to say to make you feel better. Something that you were never able to find in someone else, along with being funny and just someone you always wanted to be around.

“Talking about jobs, I applied for a new job.” Chan added

“I thought you were happy with this job?” You asked confusedly

“I am but the one I applied for it’s my dream job and I just know that if I didn’t even apply that I’d regret it my entire life.” He sighed

You knew that feeling, better than Chan probably thought. You continued walking down the street, heading to the cafe you usually went to.

“Chan?” A voice called and made Chan stop.

With his arm still around you, he turned and smiled seeing an old friend. Chan pulled from you and hugged the man, you smiled and stood close to Chan as he reunited with an old friend before the man’s eyes flickered to you.

“Is this your girlfriend?” He asked referring to you making you blush

“Oh this is my best friend, Y/n.” There was reality to make your fantasy come crashing down but Chan’s hand on your back gave you hope

Hope that lasted you weeks through your boring job and horrible love life. Dropping hint and hint trying to make it obvious but you weren’t sure how much more obvious you could make it.

“I’m Hyunjin, Chan you’re friends with such a pretty woman but you haven’t made her yours. How is that?” Hyunjin said making you laugh

“I know, Chan really dropped the ball.” You joked as you stared at Chan, he laughed and just pulled you closer to him

Chan said goodbye to his friend before you and him started off again. Your mind still stuck on that comment but you sighed.

“Anyways, my job is having a get together and I was wondering if you wanted to be my plus one?” It should’ve been so obvious, the question, the way you looked at him but Chan just smiled innocently at you. “Yeah sure, is it a formal party?”

That’s how you found yourself standing outside, as Chan was inside having fun and meeting all your colleagues. You were originally there with him but after so many times of being asked if you and Chan were dating and your best friend shutting them down, you needed to clear your head.

“Where are you going?” Chan asked grabbing your arm

“Outside, I just need some air. You continue to have fun, I’ll be back in a bit.” You told him and started to pull from his grasp, you wanted him not to let go of you.

You wanted him to pull you back into him and confess that he loved you and that he always was there for you but he just let go of your arm letting you walk away. You leaned against the wall feeling like you wanted to cry.

“Hey.” A voice besides you made you jump

You turned your head to see your friend and colleague, Lee Know standing next to you.

“Hey.” You replied watching as he took out a cigarette and lazily placed it between his lips

“I didn’t know you still smoke.” You turned to him as he lit it up.

Lee Know shrugged and took a long drag before blowing out the smoke, “trying to kill myself faster.” He joked, you laughed a bit and hit his shoulder as he asked. “So why aren’t you up there with your boytoy?”

“He’s not my boytoy.” You sighed and mumbled out the last part. “He’s made that extremely clear.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Give me that cigarette.”

You reached your hand out and Lee Know happily passed it to you, a smirk popped on his face as you took a puff.

“Y/n, the goody-two-shoes sharing a cigarette with me. You’ve hit rock bottom.” Lee Know said

You sighed and passed it back to him, “I’ve made it so blindly obvious but every time I think Chan reciprocates my love, he sucker punches me back into the friend-zone.”

“You can’t torture yourself over some boy who doesn’t like you back.”

You nodded knowing he was right, “it’s easy said then done Lee Know. Especially when he’s my best friend.”

“It’s better to just tell him then let it eat you up. I know any man is a fool to pass you up.” He took one last drag on the cigarette before letting it fall to the ground and stamping it out

You sighed and watched as he walked back inside, leaving you alone with your thoughts. You walked back into the building, the sound of laughing filled the building and Chan smiled walking up to you.

“Hey there you are.” He said

“Can we go home?” You asked

His smile faded, “Yeah, are you okay?”

You nodded, “yeah I’m just tired.”

Chan dropped you off at your house and for the next couple of days, you tried to ignore Chan. Pushing your feelings down and him away, it worked but Lee Know’s words were in the back of your mind ‘it’s better to just tell him then let it eat you up’. You knew he was right so you found yourself in front of his door.

Chan quickly opened up his door smiling at you and inviting you in as he said, “I was just about to come over to your place.”

You sat down on his couch fidgeting with your hands, “Chan I need to tell you something.”

“Me too, but you can go first.” He replied as you took a deep breath but as you opened your mouth nothing came out so you said, “why don’t you go first.”

Chan nodded, “okay, well you know my dream job that I applied for? Well I got it.”

“What! That’s amazing when did you hear?” You exclaimed forgetting about what you came here to say celebrating with your friend.

“About a couple days ago when you went out during the party. I was going to tell you but you wanted to go home. Anyways, the thing I wanted to tell you is that if I took it I’d have to move and I’d have to leave tomorrow.” Chan’s voice went soft at the last part

You let out a soft ‘oh’ as Chan nodded but his posture perked up.

“I wanted to ask you if you would come with me-I’ve done research and found a apartment that would be perfect for the two of us, it’s a nice city, and you would have to quit your job but I bet we could find you a better job. So what do you say Y/n?”

You sat there for a second stunned about what you were just hearing, it would be perfect if you weren’t in the predicament of liking your best friend who never liked you back.

“You want me to quit my job and leave my life behind by tomorrow to move to a different city where I know no one and have no family or a job?” You asked slowly and he nodded. “I bet there’s jobs you’d like there and even if you couldn’t, I make enough money to support both of us.”

You chuckled a bit before saying, “no.”

“No? Why no?” Chan asked confused he was sure you would say yes

“Because Chan.” You said and got off the couch trying to walk away

“Because why? Tell me Y/n?” He grabbed your arm now he wasn’t letting you leave

“Because I love you Chan, it’s so blindly obvious but you don’t see it. I’ve loved you for years and have given you everything of me but I can’t do that anymore and not get anything in return. I’ve never told you and never left you because I’ve always told myself that maybe you confess or ask me out tomorrow and then tomorrow comes and you haven’t so I keep telling myself that tomorrow with be the day and there could be something there between us. I have been doing that for years Chan, I’ve made it as obvious as I can and I’ve been torturing myself that way so I know you don’t share my feelings and I’m okay with that but I cannot live in this lie anymore so I wish you luck with your new life. Goodbye Chan.”

You finished and pulled from Chan, walking to the door leaving your best friend alone. Tears streamed down your face as you got into your car and drove away.

You knew what Chan was talking about when he said about regretting something for the rest of his life, you regretted staying up late for Chan, regretted clearing plans you had made to be with Chan, regretted loving Chan so deeply when he barely requited your feelings, just regretted torturing yourself for years over a boy who didn’t love you back.

Chan barely slept that night, packing for tomorrow as well as your words kept him up. He tossed and turned but finally the sun came crashing in and Chan got up and started his routine.

Get up, text you good morning….scratch that one off, take a shower, wash face, brush teeth and hair, get dressed, meet you to get coffee I’ll just forget that one. Screw it! I’ll just stay home until I have to leave and so that’s Chan did. Some people came over to say goodbye to Chan and he texted the others who didn’t come over until he had said goodbye to everybody important….but you. Chan wanted to call you but he was scared so he left without telling you goodbye.

Chan sat in the station, lonely. He was never expecting to come here alone and just like him, you sat lonely in your house trying to get use to the silence that would now always be here. Chan hated this, not being able to talk to his best friend and everything reminded him of you.

“Chan you should totally win me that stuffed koala.” Chan remembered you begging him

“I got these balloons and these flowers for you because they’re your favorite color.” Chan remember giving them to you watching as a huge smile covered your face

A sad smile ran over his face at the memories but faded as quickly as it came. Just behind him were two kids, a boy and a girl, giggling as they ran the boy ran farther ahead.

“Wait for me!” The girl called

“Wait! Chan don’t leave me.” A young you yelled and stopped as tears came to your eyes

A young Chan stopped, his smile fell as he looked at you behind him. Quickly Chan ran back to you.

“Don’t leave me.” You cried again sniffling and wiping your face

“I’m not going to leave you, I’ll always be here.” Chan comforted you

“Forever?” Your crying lessened as you looked up at the boy

Chan nodded, “forever.”

“Last call for boarding!” The announcer called

Chan got up holding onto his bag and boarded onto the train. He sat down and sighed, getting ready for a long ride ahead putting in his earphones as he looked out the window watching a teen couple laugh and the girl rested her head on his shoulder just as a certain song came on.

“I can’t believe she dumped you right before the dance. That’s just low.” You shook your head as Chan told you a story. “Well good thing you have me.”

Chan laughed as he led you into the gym where the dance was being held. The sound of music blared in the gym and couples littered the floor as they danced. You pulled him over to the drinks hand one to Chan, they talked for a bit before you disappeared onto the dance floor dancing to a upbeat song.

Chan watched his best friend until a slower song started and everyone paired up. He slowly moved to you holding out his hand, “may I have this dance?” He asked as you giggled and took his hand

Chan pulled you closer and started dancing, his eyes locked on you not being able to look away.

“Y/n I have to tell you something.” Chan whispered

“Hmm?” You hummed smiling

“We’ve been friends forever and I always want to be there with you b-b-but t-that not what I-I have to say. Y/n I-“ just then the song stopped and two other people walked up to you and Chan

You hugging them as Chan was left standing there with two words left on his tongue.

“I love you Chan—“ you voice rang out yelling those words at him. “I know you don’t share my feelings and I’m okay with that but I cannot live in this lie anymore”

“That’s not true.” Chan whispered. “I love you.”

Chan jumped up out of his seat, grabbing his stuff and racing off the train before it could pull out of the station. You sat on your couch, alone and miserable not knowing who to talk to.

“It hurts.” You mumbled to yourself. “I feel empty and so lonely.”

The soft ticking of your clock was the only company until there was a rapid knocking on your door. Your eyebrows furrowed as you got up and walked to your door, opening it up you saw the last person you wanted to see.

“Chan?” You asked. “What are you doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be on your train?”

Chan stood in front of you, he dropped his bag and gulped. “Yeah I am, sorry I’m out of breath I ran all the way here from the train station.”

“That’s 13 blocks away!” You exclaimed

Chan nodded, “I know but I had to tell you something. I’ve felt this way for a while and today almost leaving made me realize that I don’t want to lose you. Y/n, I love you.”

A smile covered your shocked face as you nodded, “I love you too.”

“Will you be my girlfriend?” Chan asked smiling

“Yes.” You answered as Chan cheered and pulled you closer hugging you tightly

When he pulled away Chan spoke again, “my adrenaline is pumping through my veins and I really want to kiss you, can I kiss you?”

You nodded and giggled before Chan cupped your cheeks and leaned forward pressing his lips against yours. There was something there between you and Chan, it just took both you and him a little bit to realize.

[clatoera]

What’s everyone’s phone lock screen in ARWBFTB au :) just thought I’d send a fun one today 😅

Oh this is sooooo fun omg especially bc like…theres so many options ✨Ironically the answers are mostly like…each other. I’m so excited okay sooo

Cato’s is definitely Clove looking annoyed. Like giving him enough attitude in her face that you can see it in the picture. I don’t know exactly what she was doing IN the picture but she looks annoyed and he loves it. Thats the like outside lock screen picture, the INSIDE  picture is absolutely one that should not be seen publicly. LIke…absolutely not for public consumption but for his yes indeed okay. He later becomes obsessed (and I mean obsessed) with pictures of Clove and their son so it’s an ever changing combo of pictures he takes of them. Not the inside picture. That one NEVER Changes (except to other pictures that should not see the light of day).

Clove’s is the two of them together probably looking at each other and not at the camera. She’s probably in his lap, they’re probably staring at each other, her arm over his shoulders kinda thing. Like taken candidly by one of their friends at a party or something, like Glimmer seems the type to just take random pictures of people and friends because love is all around her blah blah blah. So yeah. It’s them together. Looking hot. The usual. His giant hands on her waist is a focal point. 

Finnick and Annie absolutely have the same exact picture, it’s each other and their son like a professional picture of the three of them probably on the beach. They do that thing where they’d both pick up each others phones and get so confused when they lock themselves out because they cant tell them apart. 

Marvel’s is Glimmer. He’s in the picture too but the focus is very much Glimmer like he’s stand-in behind her with his arms around her shoulder and he’s Clearly saying something in her ear because she’s laughing and THATS why it’s his favorite because she’s laughing and smiling and there is literally nothing he likes better than Glimmer being happy enough to actually laugh at something. It later becomes ever changing pictures of Glimmer and the girls and they are definitely all three matching and have the same smile and eyes and hair and it’s everything and it changes like monthly because theres constantly new outfit updates. 

Glimmer also I think has two. The like front lock screen is definitely her girls. All different variations of them but it is always them together. Usually in matching outfits. Or like snuggled up together. She is DEEPLY obsessed with them. The inside picture like barely ever changes it’s from when the girls were really little and they were exhausted with two little babies and it’s him asleep on like the recliner or something with both of them also sleeping onto of him. It’s a favorite of hers. 

Enobaria’s is just Cashmere. Like at a wedding or something with her elbow on the table and her chin in her hand. Or like laying in bed. Or literally just any way shape or form of cashmere. But it’s not like the capitol/D1 glamour shots it’s her all excited in the winter bundled up holding her little peppermint coffee, or laying on the beach in 4 in a big sun hat. Or one specific moment in the like 6 weeks of whirlwind wedding planning of Glimmer which involved Cashmere literally laying in the living room covered in sparkly light pink tulle and flowers because it was literally covering the entire house. Like moments where she seems genuinely happy and genuinely smiling because thats the part of her she never got to be prewar ya know? Sometimes rarely it’s the two of them together but mostly it’s like..just little happy pictures of cash. 

Cashmere’s is always people together. The like main one is usually her and Enobaria, like one of them looking at each other at one of the like 7890 parties they end up at post war and by that I mean dinner parties and weddings. Theres a picture of the two of them at Glimmer’s, Enobaria covered in a layer of Glitter from Cash’s dress just so so cute. I feel like theres a lot of beach gatherings because of Finnick so theres definitely pictures of the two of them extra tan that becomes a favorite of like…Cash practically sitting ontop of her. The inside picture is always like of her/gloss/glimmer I think. Sometimes the girls make the cut in the group picture, but it’s usually the three of them. 

One time Marvel got so severely sunburned he couldn’t move and Finnick made him take a picture holding up a cooked lobster for comparison and that became like at least the group chat picture if not everyone’s contact picture for him en masse. It’s not a phone screen but it’s a funny thought. 

so this got waaaaay out of my hands i'm sorry I just got so excited it was a lot of fun 😅 Thank you my friend this was SO so fun!!

[riddle-me-ri]

Ok so I got this idea from your squishing face post for the pengys like just the idea of embarrassing him :3 how about an s/o who would just pop in during a meeting and call ozzie some embarrassingly cute nicknames

You: hello my dearest cutest little pengy wengy what do you want for dinner? 😘🥰💋💖

Him: 🐧

His men: 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️

A/N: hehehe…if this isn’t some shit I’d try to pull asdfgh. Not always, but like a time or two. Just to hear him sigh in embarrassing disappointment lmao. Once again, sorry that some of these kinda follow a different scenario but the essential headcanon of them being embarrassed is there lmao

Reader Embarrassing The Penguins:

Arkhamverse Penguin:

- Oswald was bending his men’s ears so far back, they might as well have fallen off. 

- Nightwing apparently ruined their trip to the docks to retrieve a shipment of weapons. 

- Veins along Oswald’s neck and hands were popping. 

- "Hey Ozzie wozzie! I was just wanting– oh! So sorry I didn't know you were having a meeting! 

- Oz's face instantly went white as a sheet as all the blood and heat from his anger was drained. 

- He looked over his shoulder, a slight shaky smile on his face. "Uhh yeah..its all right, love. I'll be with you in a minute, yeah?" 

- You nodded beaming happily as you closed the door. 

- Some hushed snickers could be heard from his men

- Only for them to be silenced by a slamming fist to the table.

- "I better not hear a peep out of any of you about that…or else you're all gonna be lunch to the Croc! Now…back to business."

Reevesverse/Farrell Penguin:

- I am not entirely sure why, but I can imagine this Oz likes beating you to the punch?

- He knows how you normally greet him, especially when you usually assume he’s alone. 

- So as a countermeasure if he’s in a meeting or is talking to security, he beats you to the pet names. 

- “Yes, sweetheart?” “What’s going on, sugar?” 

- However, that doesn’t always stop you from throwing in a “pengy baby”, “my handsome penguin”, and of course a personal favorite; “daddy”.

- Oz may scratch the back of his neck nervously, but chuckle all the same. 

- It can be somewhat embarrassing but he adores you too much for it to get to him. 

- Nobody better ridicule you or himself when you do it, or there will be hell to pay. 

- He also doesn’t care if his men get annoyed, they just better keep it to themselves. 

Gotham Penguin:

- Okay, but no seriously…could you not? 

- It’s hard enough as it is to appear intimidating and go by “The Penguin”. 

- He knows you mean well, you don't really think twice about his reputation…

- You just see your sweet, endearing, and loving Oswald. 

- Oswald would be having a meeting with his people at the long dining table. With Butch standing at his side. 

- You come in cheerfully to see Oz, without even noticing he's in company. 

- "Hey Ozzie!" 

- Silence fills the room, a pin could be heard.

- Oswald tried to remedy it by patting your hand and telling you he won't be long…

- You nod and lean in to kiss his cheek before running off.

- He shoots daggers to Butch who continues to chortle under his breath.

BTAS Penguin:

- He’s stuck between lovestruckness and slight embarrassment. 

- Oswald doesn’t want you to stop, but knows he probably needs you too.

- He does have somewhat of a reputation to uphold in the criminal underworld. 

- Oswald adores that you are so comfortable and adore him enough to bless him with a pet name. 

- He won't be harsh or short with you, even if he's griping to his henchmen. 

- It will literally be night and day the way he interacts with you and his henchmen.

- "You fools! If your absolute incompetence continues to hinder my schemes, I will-!" 

- "Oswald? Where are you my handsome pengy?" 

- The slightest snicker comes from one of his men and Oswald is quick to silence them with a terrifying stare. 

- If they mention this incident to anyone, they will be bird food.

TNBA Penguin:

- Not that he doesn’t appreciate the sentiments…

- He just can’t exactly reciprocate them at the moment when he’s trying to take charge. 

- There are moments he won't mind, like if he's entertaining guests at the Lounge.

- Oz would lavish in the adoration you're giving him, and it shows a different side to him. 

- He's likely to tell you beforehand if he's discussing things with more…dangerous individuals. 

- It's more or less to protect you, but also to ensure you don't let any pet names slip up. 

- Whenever it does happen, he still keeps his cool meanwhile he's trying to hide his blush and not stammer his words.

Telltale Penguin:

- Why? You know how embarrassing this is for him!

- “Hey Ozzie wozzie, I was just wondering-”

- “No..no..don’t say another word.” 

- You honestly revel in his exasperated head shakes and exhausted sighs. 

- He won't ever admit it, but he does actually like it deep down. 

- He likes the fact you're comfortable enough around him to tease and mess with him. 

- The fact that you love him so much and in such a way that warrants you to give him stupid cute nicknames. 

- Sometimes he's agitated whenever you do it in front of his crew.

- But his crew knows better not to mention it ever again after an incident.

One Bad Day Penguin:

- Oh boy…

- God it’s a good thing you’re cute, it makes you get away with…well everything. 

- He’s wiping his face and pinching the bridge of his nose. 

- It’s not like he can stop you. 

- Oz does find it incredibly adorable. 

- He can't help that his face may flush just slightly. 

- Kinda like Farrell Penguin, he's also likely to dish it back to you with cutesy pet names.

- The only people allowed to tease him or mess with him about it are Lili and Freida.

The Batman (2004) Penguin:

- Ozzie groans as a cringey chill went down his spine. 

- Really? "Ozzie wozzy??"

- And in front of his criminal peers in jail? 

- You do realize he's got a reputation to protect, right? 

- He's gone toe to toe with Batman, Joker, Riddler, and even had a rag-tag team of villains of his own! 

- Oh but that…that doesn't stop you from doing it…

- It gets to a point that he doesn't even debate you or show his disdain for nicknames at least in public.

- He just becomes defensive whenever people tease him about your nicknames for him. 

- "What're you laughing at? You're just jealous!"

Batman Unlimited Penguin:

- This Oswald takes a minute to respond. 

- He’s still getting used to the foundations of a relationship…

- He completely disregarded the usage of pet names and when and where they’re appropriate to use. 

- It takes awhile for Oswald to get used to your nicknames…but they make him feel absolutely elated.

- He may be embarrassed if you do it in front of others...

- But only for a moment...because embarrassment is quickly replaced with adoration.

- If anyone mocks him or you for your endearments he's swift to silence them. 

- He's gone far too long with affection, far too long he's yearned to be addressed lovingly. 

- Oswald would be damned if he let some random henchperson or passerby get in the way of that.

[honeyypotato]

Restart

A Reiner Braun x gender neutral reader fic

▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂

“This chat is twenty years overdue,

Let’s have a seat and tell me your news.

Something about you is different,

I feel at ease when you talk.

Each painful knot is untwisted,

You’ve matured more than I thought.

My destiny is knocking,

This is what I’ve been wanting.

When did our eyes get soft?

I wanna be here, wanna be yours so hard.”

▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂

Four years ago, before his betrayal, you’d been Reiner’s love. But now, after you both survived the rumbling, could you go back to how things were?

[Lyrics and title from the song “Restart” by Veela and Mod3no]

No warnings! Go crazy! Read to ur heart’s content friends!

Tags: lots of fluff, Reiner is soft, kinda spoilers if ur new to the show, post-canon AoT things, awkward ex-couple moments, happy ending

▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂

WC: 3210

AN:

I mean…I would take this man back in a heartbeat. He could step on me and I’D be the one to apologize…you get it.

I took a break from writing my usual super-long fics to bring you this one! I came across the song this is based off of the other day and…my adhd is eating it up, so I have been listening to it on repeat.

▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂

Once more, your gaze locked with golden eyes as you sat in the library. It was a lazy spring afternoon, one which you should’ve been enjoying. Instead, you were hiding indoors, attempting to distract yourself from your emotions once again. That is, until Reiner had walked in on the opposite side of the room. 

You watched from over the top of your book as he exchanged a few words with Mikasa and Armin, who were doing some research that you didn’t have the heart to join in on. Then he turned around, and his eyes found you again, and for a moment you thought you could see him consider walking over. But after a heartbeat, he leaves you alone once more.

“You two can’t keep just staring at each other from across every room like this.”

You were shaken from your thoughts by a voice. It had been three months since you’d all returned from fighting Eren, and your relationship with Reiner was…a stalemate. Four years ago, before he’d left, you’d been his. From the moment you’d walked onto the training field as a cadet, he’d practically attached himself to you at the hip. You had never been sure of what the blond saw in you, but whatever it was caused his eyes to glow a little whenever he looked at you. Soon enough, that warmth had grown into full-blown love; your hands intertwining before missions, curling up a little too close when it was cold, sneaking kisses underneath the stars. 

Your heart shattered into a million pieces when he left, but it was more because he was leaving you, not because he had revealed himself as your enemy at the time. You couldn’t care less if he was a titan shifter, or if he’d been keeping the entire rest of the world a secret. Each morning that you were forced to wake up alone took a little piece of your soul away from you. You were long past convincing yourself it would get better with time; you’d accepted you would feel like this forever.

You looked at the source of the voice, tearing your eyes away from the empty spot where Reiner had been standing. 

“I don’t even know what I’d say to him, Jean,” you murmured as your friend sat down next to you.

“The way you look at each other says you both have a million things you want to say.”

“I wouldn’t know where to start. Besides, he’s better off not having me in his life to hold him back.”

“Now that’s just ridiculous,” Jean scoffed. “Neither of your lives are going anywhere as long as you keep up this weird…orbiting dance you’re doing.”

You raised an eyebrow at him. “Orbiting dance?”

“Yeah, you’re both too afraid to get too close to the other, even though that’s exactly what you want. So you both just keep your distance, circling around each other, hoping something will knock one of you off your path and into the other’s so you don’t have to do it yourself.”

“You learn that in therapy, or something?” You sighed, and replaced your bookmark back into the page. You wouldn’t get any more reading done.

Your remark earned a chuckle from Jean. “No, I learned it watching two people not bothering to hide their emotions at all.”

Dropping your head in mild embarrassment, you knew you’d never been good at keeping your emotions under wraps when it came to Reiner.

“Talk to him. Please,” Jean moves to stand up from his post beside you. “You’ll both feel better when you do.”

“I’ll try, Jean. But I can’t promise anything.”

Reiner knew you’d been spending your afternoons in the library, but as much as he was trying to give you all the space you needed, Historia had asked him to relay information to Mikasa and Armin. Of course they were doing their research in the library, and of course he couldn’t keep his eyes off you for two seconds when you were in the same room. It was obvious that you’d both changed; he could tell from the small conversations you’d had during the Rumbling. But hell, did he know that he still loved you. You’d grown from that rambunctious, sweet, and slightly awkward cadet into a true soldier and adult. You were level-headed and mature, a deep thinker, kind and gentle…He could tell you’d retained some of your youth, too, from the way you and Conny threw jokes at each other during meals. 

But what did you think of him? He was the one who’d torn you to bits, left you alone on the island while he returned to the safety of his country. When he wasn’t with you as a Scout, he’d spent his time figuring out ways to break the news about himself to you gently, and ways that you’d be able to stay together while he completed his mission. It had all happened so fast, though, and by the time he had Eren in the palm of his hand it was too late to explain anything. Through the titan’s eyes, and through yours, he had seen the shattered pieces of your heart. That memory had resurfaced a hundred too many times while he was back in Marley, the way you’d looked at him. As badly as he wanted to pull you close now, to try and fix everything he did and put all the pieces of your heart back together, he continually convinced himself he’d just break your heart all over again. So, he kept his distance. But when the two of you were in the same room, you were so beautiful, so perfect to him, he was pulled toward you like a magnet. 

You tried to talk to him, you really did. But you’d gotten one good look at Reiner after dinner and had turned on your heel, marching straight back to the solitude of your room. Now, you laid face down on your bed at three in the morning, cursing yourself for being cowardly yet again. This wouldn’t even be the first time you’d talked to him since he left, you’d exchanged words with him throughout the Rumbling. Hell, you fought side-by-side. But now that the fighting was over, everything was…different, and you couldn’t bring yourself to speak with him. There was just too much between the two of you.

Knowing it was going to be yet another sleepless night, you dragged yourself out of bed. Throwing on a pair of old sweatpants, it was time for yet another nighttime stroll around the building. 

Despite the fact that you were exhausted, your–what had become nightly–walks were rather peaceful. The entire city was almost silent, and you could exist in your own mind and world for a bit. Pacing through the halls, you found yourself wishing for what you always did; that he was close.

Passing the library, you had the fleeting idea that you’d read a little more of your book, so you tugged the heavy door open. But when you settled down on one of the plush couches, book in hand, you couldn’t bring yourself to read a single word. Sitting in the silence, you stared out the window into the night sky, lost in thought. 

A shifting of the couch seat next to you brings you back to the present. You had been so deep in thought you hadn’t heard the door open, but before you could conjure up a reason why you were sitting in the dark library at three in the morning, you saw a pair of eyes you hadn’t dared to be so close to in a long time.

Reiner watches fear dart behind your eyes, immediately regretting his decision to sit next to you. He hadn’t been able to sleep, as usual, so he decided maybe some fresh air would help. But when he saw you, he became so lost in the pain of the fact that you were probably doing the same as him, walking around to try and get through another sleepless night, that he forgot to glue his feet to their spot. Before he knew it he had planted himself firmly in the seat next to you, studying every inch of your face.

“Hi.” Your voice is barely a whisper, and after a heartbeat your eyes snap back to where your hands had curled tight around the book in your lap.

His face softens. “Hey.”

Your mind swirls in a panic, trying to find something–anything–to say. 

“Um…What are you reading?” He asks, causing small cracks to appear in the ice that had formed between you. His voice is deep, warm, and familiar, and you feel at ease when he speaks.

“A fantasy novel.” Daring to meet his eyes once more, your heart beats picks up when you see the warm, almost smiling expression he wears.

“Didn’t know you were into those.”

“It’s a habit I picked up. From Sasha.”

“Ah.”

You went back to cursing yourself for making it awkward.

But now Reiner is fully smiling, gently, as he gazes out the window into the starry sky. “Remember when she used to tell those stories, during missions?”

“The ones where all the characters were named after different foods?”

“Heh. Yeah, those were something else.”

“She knew how to make long horseback rides a little shorter, didn’t she?” You chuckle as that odd mix of happiness and sadness washes through you once more. Silence washes over the library again.

“I’m sorry. For everything–”

“Reiner. Don’t.” Feeling your throat tighten, you look up at him, closing the book on your lap and placing it aside.

“I–”

For the first time in years, you hold his gaze. “You have nothing to apologize for.”

“I hurt you.” You can hear the pain in his voice. There are tears in his eyes, glistening in the moonlight. 

“You were doing what you believed was right. You always have. I would have done the same.”

“What we believe is the right thing isn’t always the right thing.”

“You did what you could, with the information you were given. We all did. I could never hate you for what you did.”

“Then what do you hate me for?”

Your face twists slightly, shocked, and this time you’re the one with tears in your eyes. 

“I-I mean, you have to hate me for something.” Reiner watches your expression.

But your face changes, and a soft smile takes over your lips as you gaze up at him. “Wouldn’t that be childish of me?”

At your smile, he relaxes into the couch slightly, leaning a little closer to you. “You’re allowed to hate people as an adult, silly.”

“Hate is born from not understanding. I understand why you chose to do what you did, so how could I possibly hate you?”

“I hate myself…for what I did.”

“The choices you were forced to make weren’t easy, Reiner.”

“They should’ve been.” 

He pauses for a moment. 

“How could I leave the person I love more than anything else in this world?”

You blink in surprise. Then, warmth floods through your veins. You lean into him, pressing against his arm and resting your head on his shoulder.

“Even if I had known what you were going through, I still would have let you go. It was life or death for you,” you murmur.

“I should have found a way to live. I would have. Shit, I’ve been stabbed and shot and bombed more times than I can count.”

“You fought in a war, Rei. It must’ve been awful.”

His hand slides into yours. “It was. But I’d fight a million more just to see you for one more day.” 

“You don’t have to. And if you did, I’d be right there at your side.”

You feel him sigh, leaning his head against yours and pressing his lips against your forehead.

“Reiner…” That familiar warmth blooms in your chest, something you hadn’t felt in a long time. 

“I missed you so much,” he whispers. “I wished you were there with me every day…but also I was glad you were somewhere safer.”

He missed you…You shift in your spot to look up at him, pressing a hand to his cheek. You’re no longer so afraid to look him in the eyes. “I missed you too. But I’m here with you now.”

“You are. And I’m here with you,” he echoes, as if he’s afraid it’s all a dream, and speaking it aloud would cement the two of you in reality.

And then he shifts, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his lap, pressing his forehead against yours as your arms loop around his shoulders, tangling in the hair at the back of his head. His hands grip tightly at your waist before sliding around you completely, pulling you as close as humanly possible as your noses brush. For a heartbeat, you linger against each other, letting it settle into your minds that the other was here, until neither of you can hold yourselves back any longer, and you collapse into each other.

The familiarity of his lips against yours overwhelms you, memories of the night he first kissed you surfacing in your mind. You were both sitting on patrol, joking about something stupid, and he suddenly pulled you close. In this moment, time seems to loop back on itself, the two of you kissing in the same way you had all those years ago. Even though you’d both grown as people, he still felt the same…because the love you had for each other had never changed. 

The kiss breaks when Reiner tries to somehow get you even closer, and you giggle at his effort before sliding off his lap and pulling him with you to lay down sideways on the couch. He’s nearly surrounding you completely as he lays half on top of you, crushing you slightly but you couldn’t care less. He peppers kisses across your nose and cheeks and down your neck, lingering a little longer on each one and relishing the way you laugh when the stubble on his chin tickles you. 

The warmth of the moment overwhelms you, turning your laughter into soft sobs as you pull him close, burying your face in his chest. 

“I love you, Reiner. It’s good to have you back.”

“Oh, baby. I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere, I promise,” he whispers against your skin. But you can feel the tears running down his cheeks too. 

There’s a few moments of comfortable silence between you two, that couldn’t be more unlike the awkwardness of the past few months. Your fingertips trace over the contours of his face, occasionally wiping fallen tears off his cheeks, simply enjoying being so close. He tightens his arms around you, a rare soft smile appearing across his lips.

“You know, I got so scared when I saw you during Eren’s invasion, in Liberio,” he murmurs, brushing a stray lock of hair away from your face. “That place wasn’t safe for you at the time.”

“I wasn’t afraid for me. But when I saw the titans fighting, I was a little scared that you’d get hurt…” you trail off, getting lost in the way the moonlight reflected in his eyes. “What was life like, in Marley?”

He chuckles at your question, sinking into the couch next to you. “It had its moments…but overall, not great. I guess things like cars, photographs, and electricity were normal for me though. I probably grew up in a nicer environment than most people here.”

“Your mother did her best for you, I’m sure of it.”

“Heh, she definitely did something. I guess I get it from her.”

“What?”

“The drive to do absolutely anything for the people I love.”

“That’s one of my favorite things about you, actually.”

He raises an eyebrow at you. “Really? That’s what you like about me?” He was confused; that trait had caused the deaths of so many people. He’d always preferred not to think about it at all. But it was obvious that you didn’t see it in that way.

“Yeah, I think it’s sweet. It’s what’s kept you alive for so long.”

“No, that’s not it,” he sighs, “What kept me alive was you.”

“I wanted to live…so I could see you again too. I wanted it all to be over so we could be here, like this.”

The emotion behind his eyes is a mix of melancholy and nostalgia as he gazes at you. “How were things, after I…left?”

“Rough, at first. But eventually, we got rid of the rest of the titans, and took over the port. We met Yelena and her crew, and they brought us up to speed.”

“How nice of her,” he muses, causing you to snort out a laugh.

“I think we’re just about on par with Marley now, in terms of development.”

“Eh, it’s way nicer here. Besides, here is where you are.”

“Aw, I kinda wanted to live in Liberio for a bit…” you trail off, giving him a dramatic look that turns to laughter at his expression. “I’m kidding!”

“Heh, you better be,” he laughs, pulling you close once again. 

You move your hand to rest it against his chest as his nose slides against yours, lips fitting together like you were made for each other. His tongue presses against yours slowly, drinking in every breath, every heartbeat…every shred of evidence that you were alive and okay and in his arms. This was everything both of you had wanted since you returned from fighting. Tilting your head, you try to get closer to him, wrapping a leg around his waist as his hands slide under your shirt and up your back. But after an especially deep kiss, he pulls away slightly, his lips ghosting over yours.

“You know, we should probably head to bed before someone wakes up early and finds us making out on the library couch.”

“Aww.” You sink into the couch a little more in protest.

He sits up halfway, still leaning over you. “I promise, my bed is comfier.”

Blushing at his words, you’re thankful it’s still dark in the library. You’d half expected him to send you back to bed in your respective rooms. Who were you kidding, though? This was the man who climbed through your window as a Scout so you could sleep in each others' arms. Hell, he’d seen you naked more times than you could count. But that was so long ago, everything felt new again.

Reiner leads you back to his room, your hand in his, and you can’t hide the smile growing on your face. Not an hour ago this was something you’d only wished would happen; but now your wish had come true. When he pulls you into his room, finally into privacy, you lose track of how many kisses he plants across your skin. And as you settle into his arms under the blankets, sleep washes over you faster than it had in years. 

You wake up with your head resting against his chest, one of his hands tangled in your hair and the other around your waist, and only one thought in your mind: you were glad you talked to him.

▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂▸ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ┈┈┈┈ 🎕 ◂

[romana-after-dark]

Ghost of You: Chapter 3

Ellie Miller & Joel Miller

ft. Tommy Miller, Lorenzo and Zach Aleverano

Summary: 16 years after her mom and dad's death, Ellie is finding her place in Jackson, being raised by her Uncle Tommy with the help of her uncle's Lorenzo and Zach. She loves them, but can't help but feel stifled. Soon, she finds out her suspicions were true, and her uncles have been lying to her. Will Ellie learn the truth? Can she trust anyone in this situation?

Takes place after The Wrong Way, but if you havn't read that series (too dark for you, too long, etc) you can read this. Since it's through Ellie's perspective, you can discover the truth alongside her.

DARK FIC! This is a dark!Joel, with canon typical violence and extra on the Joel. Anything discussed or shown in TWW is liable to be discussed here. There will be violence, but no shown sexual violence. Although this Joel is very dark, he is NOT DARK TO ELLIE. None of the things that happened to Ellie's mom are applicable to Ellie, but will be discussed.

Content warnings for entire series, not chapter by chapter unless more is added.

Talk/mentions/discussions of post rape, molestation, torture, violence, branding, forced breeding, major age gap (early 20's to later 40's), death. Child endangerment, major character death, murder, homophobic remarks, minor hate crime, manipulation, identity crisis.

This is longer than I meant it to be (4.5k words), but I needed these three scenes in there and I didn't want to rush. It's hard balancing showing you Ellie's relations with all 3 uncles AND Joel developed and change and shift.

Extra warning for homophobia, and Joel being Joel.

Also some lines/back and forth are directly from the game. I've been watching scenes a lot on youtube to really get the Jackson vibes. Remember, this isn't exactly Ellie we know. She's lead a different life than show/game Ellie, and she's16 so between ages of the games. I did my best to keep Ellie Ellie, but also how might Ellie be different growing up more sheltered.

******************

“So I was thinking, if you think you can get away from Tommy for a few hour, I could meet up with my horse this time, bring you to where I live, if you’d like?”

Joel and Ellie were fishing in their usual spot, a secluded area that Ellie was pretty sure no one was going to outside of patrols; and this was her section.

“Really?” She looked up at Joel from where they both sat, his kind eyes looking down at her, awaiting an answer.

“If you aren’t ready, of course, we don’t gotta. I know it’s kinda a big step but-”

“I’d love to! If I’m gonna take over, I better start learning the land outside of Jackson, huh?”

He smiled at her fondly. “Yeah, it’ll be like bring your daughter to work day.”

“Huh?”

“Never mind, pre-outbreak joke. You can meet some of the guys if you want. If not I’ll tell ‘em to clear out while we’re there.”

Ellie’s eyes lit up. “Really?! Wicked!” 

“Careful.” He chuckled. “You’re starting to sound like you’re uncle Lorenzo.”

Two months ago, that would’ve been a compliment.

It took a few weeks to plan, but Ellie managed to trade some thing Joel brought her to Jesse in order for him to take her farming shift for the day. Jesse’s parents didn’t care where he was. After Ellie accidently cut Tommy’s hand, Maria thought it was only fair Ellie pick up the slack for what Tommy was unable to do. Well, unable wasn’t the right word. He had, in fact, tried to go to work as usual but got sent some when his dried wound broke open and bleed all over him. The news, of course, got to Maria who came to see him and found out the extent of the injury. Tommy refused to let Maria make Ellie do his work, not wanting her up on roofs or around heavy machinery, so Lorenzo swapped in for Tommy and Ellie was in charge of Lorenzo’s work for a few weeks while Tommy’s hand healed. He still helped as much as he could, but was frequently sent home with Maria telling him the point of a commun was everyone pitched in to help each other. Ellie found she liked the work, and even after Tommy got permission to work again she began doing agriculture in addition to patrol. It was summer, and she figured she needed to start doing more for the community. If she was going to take over for Joel, the more skills she had the better. She planned on earning her role, not just inheriting it.

Ellie stood at the porch, nervous. Not of Joel, no. She trusted him. Not nervous of the men inside, no. Joel wouldn’t let them do anything to her. No, this is the house. The house. The one she was conceived in, the one Joel took her mom to when he rescued her from Ellie’s grandpa, the one Joel and Uncle Tommy lived in for years before her mom, the one where her mom met Uncle Tommy and Uncle Lorenzo… This is the house she was born in, the house her mom died in. Joel had told her he and the men were gone when it happened, when the infected came. Tommy had found them, Tommy having come to the house for a reason he wouldn’t tell Joel… but he was the one that found the two of them before Joel came home and saw what happened.

“Do you wanna see her first?”

Behind the house is where her mom was buried.

“Please?”

Ellie stared at the grave, a headstone that read her first and middle name followed by Miller. Wife, mother, friend. ‘For they say you are taking the sunshine’ was inscribed on it, song lyrics Ellie knew right away. In the front, near patches of grass and a well worn area for sitting, there were flowers at varying stages of decomposition at the base… Joel brought them a lot, it seems. “Red River Valley” Ellie muttered about the lyrics, choking back tears. She will not cry, she told herself. “That’s uncle Zach’s favorite.”

Joel nodded in understanding. “Your moms too. Learned it on guitar just for her.”

Walking in the house, her chest felt tight, feeling like she may have another panic moment like she did when she first met Joel… all eyes were on her as she walked in, Joel telling them to ‘show some goddamn respect’ to shut them up. Walking in the dining room, however… her worry dissipated. Joel had set up a meal for her. “Figured you’d be hungry. I’m not the best cook, but…”

Thing was, it was good, vegetables and all. Joel even muttered manners after she ripped a large belch at the table. Afterwards, Joel asked if she wanted to see the room. Ellie knew which one.

It was strange, seeing the room she was born in, the room her mom died in. The window had been boarded up, a shitty mattress on the floor, a piano to the right and a few boxes of random things here and there.

“This is where your mom lived when she first came to live with us, before we were married. These are her things. You can look if you want.”

And look she did. Ellie flipped through the items, taking them out and holding them, smelling the clothes, boxes of pretty dresses, a few baby items that they had gotten preparing for her birth, a well-worn deck of cards… With Joel’s permission to explore and a heartsick eye watching her, she touched the things her mom touched, slowly getting a sense of who she was, dust-collected memories strewn about the room as Ellie took in everything she could: comic books that read Star Wars on the cover, a book called Jurassic Park, eventually landing on the piano.

She stood up from the floor of memories she never got to have, approaching the small piano with care and wonder. Zach taught her to appreciate instruments; they were rare, Lorenzo working extra hard and drawing in all his connections to bring Uncle Zach the one he had.

Tentatively, Ellie plucked out a few cords, drawing Joel over to where she stood.

“You play, Ellie June?”

Ellie nodded. “A little. Zach taught me some. I’m not good, but… I know Red River Valley.”

A soft smile spread across his sad face. “I’d love to hear you play, baby girl”

“I’m not singing. Fuck that shit.” She was quick to warn, making Joel chuckle and assure her he could handle that part.

With hesitant hands, she began playing the cords, and to her delight, Joel leaned over the piano as he began singing. He stared at her, intense and seemingly lost in thought. Ellie pulled her eyes away from his to concentrate on the keys. She couldn’t play when he looked at her with such pain…

“From this valley they say you are going…”

When concluded, the tears that glistened in Joel’s eyes were evident; a sharp agony pierced his so deep Ellie wondered how he made it through all these years without them. 

“I loved her” His voice croaked.

“I know”

“No, I just…” Joel closed his eyes and shook his head. “I know you know.” When he looked at her again, she was greeted with a soft smile, the kind of smile that warmed her front he sadness that ached for her mom, for him… “I love you both, Ellie June. Very much. Death don’t stop me from loving her.”

Ellie nodded, but was uncomfortable with emotions like that, so she abruptly changed the subject, looking over the box of clothes. “She had a lot of dresses.”

There was that smile again, that fond, wistful smile. “Yeah, it was impractical, really, but she looked so pretty… I brought her back everything I could find, she could usually sew them up to fit.”

She couldn’t remember the last time she wore a dress; Uncle Tommy stopped putting her in them when he realized how much Ellie did not like wearing them, never pressed the issue. Now she was regretting not having anything, just a tad.

“There’s a town dance coming up… I don’t even got a sundress or nothing.”

Joel immediately jumped at the opportunity, striding over to the closet and flipping past them. “You can look through these! They might not be your style, their awfully girlie-” he quickly turned around. “Not that you’re not girlie!”

“I’m not.” She chuckled, and Joel chuckled back. “But won’t uncle Tommy recognize them?”

“Most of them are from after Tommy left- here, what about this one, it’s simple.”

Joel pulled out a dress that would rest right at Ellie’s knees, a collarbone neckline and ¾ sleeves. Simple, not showy.

“It’s really fucking purple” She said, hesitant.

His smile faltered a bit, the excitement in his voice fleeting out as he went to hang it back up. “You’re right, you’re right, maybe there’s something black in here? Or, depending how far away it is I can see what I can get my hands on for you?”

Ellie realized he was trying to connect, trying to make an effort, trying to do dad things with Ellie the way he never could before. She jumped up, quickly grabbing the dress. “It’ll be fun!” She assured. “I don’t really wear dresses anyway, so I’ll be trying all kinds of new stuff.”

Joel’s face lit up with so much bright excitement, she thought he looked 10 years younger. “You tryna impress someone, Ellie June?”

Heat crept up her neck and onto her face. She was, kinda. Dina had made a comment a few weeks ago how pretty another girl, Jess, looked in a dress and Ellie thought about it non-stop for a week. It wasn’t that she was trying to impress Dina, no! That would be silly! But… did she want Dina to think she was pretty too? She wasn’t sure. She had only just learned the truth of her existence. One identity crisis at a time.

Instead of telling her she can’t have a boyfriend, hounding her on who, giving her a talk, Joel simply smiles. “Good. Love is a beautiful thing.” He wanders over to the boxes of items. “You like to read?”

She nodded. “Yeah, when something catches my interest.”

Sifting through the books, Joel found what he was looking for. The book was hefty, nearly the size of a brick, the cover reading ‘Jurassic Park’. He tossed it to her. “Thought you might like this one. Lots of action. The leading lady is named Ellie, I think that’s where your mom got your name.”

Ellie looked at the book. She imagined her mom reading it, flipping through the pages while pregnant with her, as Joel worked long hours to protect his community and have everything Ellie and her mom needed… “What if Uncle Tommy see’s it?”

The bright look on Joel’s face darkened just a bit. “You’re awfully worried about him. He good to you? He take care of you?” 

“I mean… yeah.” Although her and Tommy weren’t on speaking terms, she would never say he didn’t take care of her. Hell, every single day there was a plate or a bowl for dinner made up for her in the fridge with a note saying to eat her vegetables. That was all the communication she had other than Ellie shouting the newest lie of where she’d be.

“He don’t hurt you, does he?” Joel’s voice was calm and steady, but there was a deadliness behind it.

Ellie burst out laughing at that, cackling for a while before she looked up at Joel’s confused face. “Sorry” She said through laughs. “I know you’re trying to be protective but-” A few more laughs. “Tommy’s never so much as frowned at me. He couldn't hurt me if he tried.” 

“You have no idea what Tommy is capable of.” The warning in his tone was clear. ‘You don’t want to know the things he’s done’ but Ellie just laughed at Joel’s serious act.

“No, no I know,” She giggled. “I’m well aware. He was a raider, and Tommy’s told me he wasn't proud of himself before he came to Jackson” Slowly, Ellie’s laughs settled, but her smile reminded as Jel watched her intently. “But Tommy would never hurt me.” Thinking back on the last 16 years, the years she remembered anyway, thinking about Tommy… the gentle father who showered her in nothing but kindness, understanding, care… Maybe she had judged him too harshly…

Joel’s body language changed, he loosened up again. “Few weeks before I kicked Tommy out, I found bruises on your mom.” He began walking around the room, pacing, avoiding Ellie’s eyes again. 

“...What?” The life was sucked out of the room.

“She had some excuse or another, I questioned her if it was Lorenzo, Jack, any of the men… I didn’t even asking if it was Tommy. Never thought he could either.” Joel continued talking as Ellie listened intently, mouth slightly open agap. “When he left, she finally told me. Broke down sob’n about it, broke my damn heart, seeing her like that. Told me Tommy had come onto her.”

Ellie stood in shock at the revelation. All this time, Tommy spoke about her mom with such wonder, such reverence, tere had been times she wondered if he had feelings for her… but Renzo and Zach spoke similarly. She was an innocent, good person who died a tragic death, it was no wonder they held her in high esteem… but love? Or is it lust… What exactly was it he had done?

“Did he… did he tried to…” She couldn’t get the words out. She couldn’t fathom Tommy raping someone… but she was beginning to wonder if the Tommy she knew wasn’t really Tommy at all.

“No” Joel assured before clarifying. “Not that… but… he wanted her to choose him over me.” A slight blush, a shuffle of feet, the smallest sad smile… “This was early on, we were still figure’n things out, you know? I think she might’ve had a crush on him. I wouldn’t blame her if she did. I was gone long hours, leaving her alone with Tommy to protect her, it’s only natural. But she wouldn’t leave me. She said he took her arm, tried to pull her, get her to run away together ‘n shit. She wouldn’t go. She was loyal like that…” There it was again, that wash of sadness, that unbearable pain that Ellie had no idea how he stomached. “He gripped her hard enough she bruised for days…” When his eyes met hers again, there was a flash of anger, something she had yet to see from him. “I’m not say’n he’d hurt you either, I’m just say’n if he does, or he scares you, or you just want to leave for any reason… you have a home here. I’ll take care of you, Ellie June.”

Ellie’s eyes watered, but more importantly, she was focused on her stomach not spilling over in disgust. This was the nail in the coffin. Not only was her entire life a lie, but the man she had loved most in this world was no longer a safe person, no longer a good person, no longer her dad.

The dance was a week later, Ellie stepping out of her room in a dress to see Tommy turn around, mouth agape at the sight of his niece in a dress for the first time in… what? A decade? But Ellie ignored him.

“You look nice” Tommy tried to tell her as she stormed through the hall in the purple dress (a light jean jacket on to offset the purple) “Be safe. I’ll be there in a bit if you want to-” but she was gone before he could finish. Ellie and Tommy always danced together, starting with little Ellie in his arms, then standing on his feet, then slowly learning moves as Tommy swung her around. A year back, Ellie asked why he always danced with her, why he taught her all these fancy moves, and he said it was so Ellie wasn't impressed by “some no good Johnny sidestepping to a slow song. If he loves you, he'll learn how to do the pretzel.”

Ellie had no intention of dancing with Tommy tonight. He joined the town hall as promised a little bit after her carrying the moonshine he was famous for. He used to allow her and Dina some sips here and there if they swore to be responsible… but Ellie was not going to ask. Maybe she could get Jesse to get a cup for them, Tommy wouldn’t know how old Jesse was, right? Ellie couldn’t stand looking at Tommy any more… Over the last week, she had mauled over what Joel had revealed: Tommy taking her, Tommy, Zach and Lorenzo lying, Tommy hurting her mom, trying to take her away from Joel… she was disgusted. The man she knew didn’t exist.

The offer to move in with Joel was on the table, and Ellie was considering it… Only thing is, even if she was furious at Tommy, she was still going to miss her other uncles and her aunts. Jackson was all she knew. Of course, she’d need to move in with Joel eventually if she was going to take over, and sooner is better than later, but besides the obvious of leaving her hometown, there was a huge, glaring reason why Ellie was hesitant to leave, and she was dancing in Ellie’s arms right now.

Dina.

Ellie spoke softly to her friend as they slowly danced… it was that basic side to side that Tommy warned her about, but Dina wasn’t a man. Dina was Dina, just a friend… “Every guy in this room is staring at you right now.”

“Maybe they're staring at you.”

She nodded, but didn’t believe her. Ellie never thought of herself as much to look at. It wasn’t that she was self deprecating, to her, it was just a fact.  But That’s okay, she didn’t need to be pretty… well, except to Dina. “They're not.”

“Maybe they're jealous of you.”

“I'm... just a girl. Not a threat.”

“Oh Ellie... I think they should be terrified of you.”

To Ellie’s surprise, Dina went in for a kiss… and to Ellie’s bigger surprise, she reciprocated it. It felt good, so, so good to finally let out that tension, that desire for her friend she’s had for so long… until she felt a strong grip on her shoulder, and she let go of Dina.

“Hey, this is a family event.”

Turning to see Seth, Ellie wanted to back away, to apoligize and leave it alone… but if she was going to lead a group of raiders in protecting a community, she needed to be strong, to be brave, she needed to be the kind of woman Joel thought she was. Although only 5’1, Ellie stood up as tall as she could get and faced off with the old man in front of her. “We weren’t doing anything, Seth.”

Seth glared down at her. “Yeah, you were. We don’t need another goddamn dyke in this town.”

Before Ellie could respond, Seth was ripped off of her, Ellie wobbling forwards as Seth’s grip on her shoulder was yanked away.

“Get your goddamn hands off my daughter!” Tommy shouts, shoving him back and away from Ellie. Zach jumps in, something about ‘Did you fucking hurt her?’ and predictably, Lorenzo isn’t far. Seth has some choice words to say to Renzo and Zach and Ellie knows a few of them are slurs, but in the chaos of the four men and the shock entering her system, she can’t make out much. Maria appears, telling Tommy to settle it, and Tommy calls her uncles away, telling Seth that if he finds him near his ‘child’ ever again, he’s a dead a man, earning a glare from Maria as she ushered Seth away.

Tommy turned to her, attempting to put his hands on her face but Ellie stumbled back in fear. She didn’t trust Tommy anymore.

“Fuck off!” She shouted at the man who had only ever been loving to her, watching his heart shatter in his dark eyes. Lorenzo and Zach’s voices are heard interchangeably trying to calm her down, but Ellie had tunned them out.

“Ellie, I’m sorry” Tommy began. “He had no right-”

“And you do?” She shouted back.

“Elles, what-”

“YOUR LYING TO ME!” It was all but a scream now, echoing off the walls of the dance hall that had now silenced at the scene unfolding before them. “You’re all fucking lying to me!” She referenced her married uncles watching them. “Fuck you!” Running away from them, running past Dina, Ellie took off into Jackson as Lorenzo’s voice called for her, his footsteps keeping after hers for a short while before he stopped. Uncle Renzo had been shot in his torso before she was born, and the old wound showed up in his limited ability to do cardio.

By the time Ellie had made it home, both hers and her uncles houses looked like the had gone to step. Ellie almost made it up the stairs to the porch when she heard Zach’s voice over from his. “Is that what you’ve been hiding?”

Ellie wiped her head around to see him. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Zach didn’t move to get up, simple sat in his chair, watching her. He didn’t look made, worried, sad… he just looked like Zach.

“Dina. You guys seeing each other?”

A blush crept up Ellie’s face. “I- I don’t- that was nothing we just-”

“30 years ago, Ren and I wouldn’t have been able to get married, you know that?”

Ellie nodded. She did know that before, men weren’t allowed to marry men, and women weren’t allowed to marry women. 

Zach continued, soft and calm as he always was. “You have a blessing here. I ain’t saying you need to fall in love and marry her, but… she treat you right?”

The teared welled up again. Yes, yes Dina absolutely did. “Y-yeah.”

He nodded again. “That’s all I need to know about that, Ellie Bellie. I need you to understand something. What we are- or rather, what me, Ren, June and Maura are… you don’t need to label anything right now. What we are, for thousands of years was something that meant we could be legally killed for and was something people continued to beat and kill us for up until the outbreak. It was only a few years before when a boy in this very state was killed for being gay; just a teenager, about your age. Hell, it happens still, I know, but I think there are so much bigger issues at hand, most people just… begrudgingly accept it. Some people, like Seth, say a few things but he wouldn’t beat you, wouldn’t torture you, wouldn’t see the things I’ve seen…” Zach closed his eyes and shook his head before opening them. He didn’t say a thing about the tears that had finally fallen from Ellie’s face. “I ain’t tryna scare ya, or guilt trip ya. I’m just saying… it’s a beautiful thing to be living somewhere that we don’t gotta hide anymore. And if you are gay, I just… I need you to know, you don’t have to be afraid or ashamed. I love you, very much, so do Lorenzo, June and Maura. And even though you aren’t talking, Tommy would die for your right to love who you love.”

Ellie couldn’t talk. She could betray how much she had been crying in the light of the moon, how much Zach’s words had touched her, how much she was scared of her future. But Zach knew.

He nodded one final time. “Slam the door when you get in so Tommy knows you’re safe.”

It wasn’t long after the dance that things escalated for Ellie. Joel had been walking with her, showing her the rounds as he usually did when he asked if she’d like to take things a step further, if she wanted to see what he really did, the hard parts.

Of course she did. “What do you mean?”

Joel nudged her off their regular path that Ellie was getting to know, and explained. “Got a man, justice that needs to be served. You okay with seeing that?”

Ellie didn’t need to know what kind of justice it was. She trusted Joel, and if he thought the man needed to die, then he needed to die. Soon, she was standing in front of a man with a black bad over his head who was tied up to a tree. By the sounds of his muffled whimpers and cried, he must have been gagged by something. He was afraid, desperately trying to get out of the ties that bound him to the rough trunk that left bleeding scratches on his arms and hands.

Suddenly face to face with the concept, Ellie’s resolve wavered around her. “Joel, I don’t know…” The man paused for a second, listening to her it seemed.

Joel turned to her, his face open but firm. “This is part of the job. You can’t just have others doing the dirty work, we gotta be able to do as we tell others, Ellie June.” When Jole emphasized her name, the man began screaming in hysterics, writhing and thrashing against the tree which only served to disturb Ellie more.

The leaves and sticks beneath her crackled and she shifted her weight to the other foot. “I dunno… do I have to watch?”

His face was grave and serious. “Ellie June, if you don’t think you can do this, you can tell me now. You’ll always be my daughter and I’ll love you and take care of you. You don’t have to take over-”

“No!” Ellie jumped in, trying to ignore the frantic pleas from the man in front of her. “Just… he deserves it, right?”

“Absolutely. I don’t hurt people who don’t deserve it.” Joel talked over the wailing that was growing increasingly hard to ignore. “We don’t tolerate rapists here.”

Ellie gave her consent, and Joel, inturn, gave her earplugs. “Don’t wanna end up deaf like your old man.”

Stepping up to the man, Joel placed the gun up to his bag-covered forehead and fired. To Ellie’s shame, she mostly felt relief that the man stopped screaming, even though it was because the life left his body, head hanging down low as his body slumped forward. Shock was probably the best way to describe her feelings, she was unable to process witnessing her first death… but he deserved it, right? This was good. The man was a rapist. Rapists deserve death, and Joel didn’t tolerate rapists in his communities. This was a good thing. This was a good thing. Joel was a good guy. Joel protected women. Tommy had hurt her mom. Joel protected her mom. This was a good thing. 

“What are you doing?” Ellie asked, shaking like a leaf- when did she start shaking? Was she scared? There was no reason to be scared, not of Joel. This was a good thing.

Joel was bent over the man, lifting up his sleeve and doing something Ellie couldn’t see.

“Always take credit for what you do, Ellie June. Never hide in the shadows.”

This was a good thing.

*****************

Ellie's name comes from Jurassic Park bc i fucking said so. I love Jurassic Park, so sue me.

Anway! Lots happening here

Fun fact I was already planning on having Tommy defend Ellie against someone being homophobic and I'm talking to Maura about it, and she, who loves the games and played the second one, goes "you'll never beleive this" turns out theres a scene in the game XD so hey!

All the stuff in little ones rooms made me emo esp the playing cards ;-;

and the irony of Joel saying he doesnt tollerate rapists SIDE EYE

@maura-honey @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @the-fox-den @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @koshkaj-blog @primosworld @miraclesabound @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

[cyncerity]

Hi, I absolutely love your store shifter au and it gave me so much brainrot!! I’m borrowing a friend’s account for the moment because I can’t have a tumblr. Anyhow, I just wanted you to say that even if I can’t interact, I absolutely love all your ideas!!! If I understood the lore right, I would assume George is Sapnap’s younger brother and whatever traumatizing experience caused Sapnap to shift also took George away from Dream when they were young. Will Dream and George ever meet in person and if they met as tinies, would George realize it was Dream and what would he think of Dream having the pendant/braid? How would Tommy learn Dream was a shifter, and if one of them was tiny when that happened how would they deal with/would there be a language barrier? And how does Dream learn to shift back? This is much longer than intended, sorry. Feel free to answer parts of it or none of it, I just wanted you to know you’re wonderful!! And if this ask isn’t long enough, then here’s some writing prompts -a friendly admirer

“I can’t believe it.”

“What?”

“My clothes. They just look so, so…”

“Yeah. Hard to believe we even fit that size, right?”

“It’s crazy.”

xxxxxx

"Wow"

"What?"

"Nothing... I'm just not used to

seeing you from this angle.”

"Yeah, I guess it's usually the

other way around.”

This is literally one of the most personal asks I’ve ever gotten solely for the fact that how you described being on tumblr is exactly how I was

I wasn’t allowed on tumblr, so i’d wait till everyone in my house was asleep and then pull out my middle school ipod as a burner device, look at g/t posts for an hour or so, then delete the google tabs i’d pulled them up on and fully shut down the ipod and hide it.

I lurked in this specific community for about a year, then lurked with an account so i could send asks for about another half year until i caved and got the app without parental permission lol (my dad had seen how tumblr was before the bad bots started to get banned so he honest to god thought this was one of those kinda sites but hes chill now)

suffice to say i completely know where you’re coming from and I love you for it 💖

Even if you can’t like my posts or have an account, just coming on here and saying you like my content is so awesome and it absolutely means the world to me 💕✨💖

As for you’re thoughts on the lore (and thank you for sending so many questions I love when this happens):

You’re getting close >:)

Sapnap doesn’t have any siblings, but as I’ve mentioned before (i think), Quackity does! And the event that sparked Sapnap’s shifting was similar to what got George taken in the first place (which could definitely be a reason that it was distressing enough to cause him to shift 👀), just on a larger scale and at different times. George was gone well before Sapnap became a shifter.

As for more on George, i’ll limit myself to what I can say cause there’s so much I want to write for him. At some point it’s my goal to write a story for him as a sort of interlude of the “dream shifted for the first time” story (there will be more parts! I’m working on them! Ngl this ask kinda made me realize how much I wanted to finish the second part of that) and have him fully explained there.

But I can tell you that Dream and George will meet in person! I can’t tell you if Dream will be tiny when they meet, cause you don’t even know for sure what species George is yet, but i promise the boys will meet! Will George know it’s Dream when they meet and vice versa? Who knows! That’s for me to know and you all to find out later >:)

Tommy won’t learn Dream is a shifter for a while, since Dream is stuck at the store. It also takes a bit of time for a new shifter to shift back to their normal size, since they’ve been repressing their capabilities for so long, their body has to stay at the opposite size to get used to it initially. Dream will be able to shift back at some point, but not without some help :)

And now that you mention it, there definitely could be a language barrier, and that could make things really interesting 👀 (im imagining Tommy seeing Dream tiny for the first time at a loss for words and Dream frantically trying to explain what he is but obviously Tommy already knows, so Tommy starts talking about being a shifter himself and he can’t hear Dream’s absolute shock and confusion at this information and can answer none of his questions)

And the writing prompts, YES, i am IN LOVE WITH THEM

If i don’t write specific things for them, they will be put into the next few stories for this au because they are such good ideas oh my word

and as a treat because i loved answering your questions and it made me really happy to get an ask that hit so close to my own experience here’s some miscellaneous Store Shifter drawings from my chorus class, just for you bestie 💖

i have so many of these for so many aus you don’t even know the half of it

[devondespresso]

WIP Wednes-eekend: Summer Challenge Edition 

tagged by @stobinesque​ 💕💖💞 Im not sure if the summer challege edition is like. specific to your fics or not so oopsies if it is

The Rules

Post the file names of up to 5 of your WIPs for people to send you asks

Post a snippet of one of those WIPs

When people send you an ask with the name of one of your WIPs, write 3 lines of that WIP.

(Optional) Post the lines you wrote.

You can send multiple requests especially since this is going on through the weekend!

Also feel free to send as many as you want, im gonna devote my free time to this anyway so your just directing the adhd energy to a specific section

WIPs

Since I’m planning on just going wild on my Steve Henderson AU for the foreseeable future and I’m doing a lot of jumping around in it, I figured i’d list different chapters I’m working on as the wips (I also just really wanted to share chapter titles early because i put a lot of effort into making these meme references relevant and i think theyre funny) So in no particular order but definitely chronological because this is just chapters 3-6.5:

1. Get yo fucking dog, bitch (It don’t bite) (YES IT DO)

2. What the fuck kinda dog is that? (Bitch an interdimensional dog)

3. “Lab Work Ahead?” Uh, yeah, I sure hope it does

4. There’s one thing worse than a demodog (Boom) A Billy Hargrove (Actually yes)

5. ✨Bonus Chapter (Dustin pov): Can we go to the tunnels (*slamming*) Can we please go to the tunnels

Snippet

this ones from chapter 3 aka Get Yo Fucking Dog, Bitch

They pulled up to Steve’s again, this time into Steve’s garage connected to the front of the house. Steve hopped out, running over to unlock the door and crack it open. Dustin was still in his seat, looking around the room. Impressed with the house: a reaction that King Steve usually found validating but now made Just Steve uneasy.

Steve went over and knocked on his window before crossing back to the other side and opening the backseat door. Dustin turned around.

“You have your own garage?”

He nodded, putting two bags in one arm and grabbing a third.

“C’mon, are we in a rush or not?” he joked. Dustin climbed out, still distracted.

Steve pushed through the door, catching it with his foot before it could bump into the wall and waited for Dustin who was balancing three bags of his own.

They turned the corner and he set the bags on the kitchen island, Dustin still absently taking everything in. It took a few trips, but eventually they got all the meat on the counter, leaving the pasta and dry groceries in the car to save time.

“Alright, you start unloading stuff and I’ll find us some buckets or something.” he said, setting the last bag down and heading back to his garage, “And do not touch the knives until I’m back.”

“Dude, I’m twelve, I can hold a knife.”

“Just don't start without me, okay?"

"Five minutes and then I'm raiding your knife block."

Tags

hiding the tags down here because i definitely rambled too much up top so (no pressure ofc) @blushweddinggowns @spicysix @wuffgang-ameowdeus-moozart @lets-try-to-be-normal-otakus @eriquin @marvel-ous-m 💃🪩🕺