#kiara please draw

[littlekiara96]

Taking requests

A'ight, it's high time I started trying to make some money somehow, so uhh... I'm starting a new thing, I shall call

Kiara! Please draw

Send a request to my inbox starting with the words "Kiara! Please draw". If I accept your request, I'll draw it, post the low res version here and the high res version on my patreon for like 2-5$ depending on how much effort I put into it. That way, anyone can ask anything and get something, and people who would like to support me can do it too.

I'll do anything related to these fandoms:

Honkai: Star Rail

Genshin Impact

Zenless Zone Zero

League of Legends (and Arcane)

Ace Attorney

Pokémon

Legend of Zelda

One Piece

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure (up to Stone Ocean)

Drakengard, Nier

If the fandom you're looking for isn't on the list, send a request anyway, I might still do it.

I'll do single characters, ship art, crossovers, AUs, silly stuff, cute stuff and meme redraws. If you link a ref to an OC in your ask, I can do OC x Canon or even Selfship :D

If your request is somewhat suggestive, please send it to my unhinged sideblog (though I won't do complete NSFW).

Requests can be anonymous (but I won't receive anything with media attached).

Please refrain from making more than one request at a time (unless you ask for "X or Y" but don't overuse this), thank you for your understanding.

Look up my tag "#kiara draws" if you want to see my art.

Thanks for your support, and please share <3

[unhingedkiara96]

Kiara! Please draw Sanji Vinamoke dressed in his Wano kimono but have it open so it shows his fundoshi/loincloth. What do you think?

I think I'm still in love with him, after all these years...

I genuinely couldn't have asked for a better first request, so thanks a bunch~ <3

High res version is available on my Patreon shop with a lineart version as a bonus :D

[ministarfruit]

day 13: goddess ♡

(femslashfeb prompt list)

[peepeepoopoomonster69420]

i've been playing a lot of "papers, please" lately so i decided to make a lil comic with THE GORLS

[rafecameronssl4t]

Can I please get smth with rafe x thorton!reader where shes confronted by topper’s ex girlfriend or something bc she got cheated on

Ruined Heels || Rafe Cameron x Thorton!reader

A/n: kinda sorta dislike this but thank you for the request!!

Warnings: vomiting? swearing idk what else lmk

Word count: 952

MASTERLIST (rafe x thornton!reader au masterlist)

Divider by @yoonitos

mood board “You ain't never had the feds investigate you. You ain't never had the bad hoes wanna date you.”

Your heeled foot taps rhythmically on the polished wooden floor, perfectly in sync with the pounding beat of the music that fills the house, the bass reverberating through every room.

“And then she started a hissy fit like she always does,” Sarah says, rolling her eyes dramatically as she recounts Kiara’s latest outburst. Her voice carries a mix of exasperation and amusement, a combination that makes you snort with laughter. You tilt your head back, letting the cool liquid slide down your throat before setting the empty glass on the table beside you.

“Hey,” Rafe’s voice cuts through the chatter and music, drawing your attention. He strides over with a confident smirk, “Wanna go upstairs?” He asks, his fingers drumming lightly on your crossed knee, sending a shiver up your spine as you look up at him.

“Gross,” Sarah mutters under her breath, clearly unimpressed with Rafe’s suggestion. You glance at her, “Will you be okay?” you ask, concern lacing your voice as you prepare to stand. Rafe reaches out to help you, his hands gentle yet firm as they grasp your waist, pulling you to your feet. His fingers brush against your dress, tugging it back into place as it rides up slightly.

“Yeah, I think I saw Kaycee in the kitchen,” Sarah replies with a sigh, her expression softening as she gets up from the sofa. She gives you a reassuring nod, her eyes briefly meeting yours before she turns towards the kitchen.

You nod back as Rafe leads you away. His hand remains on the small of your back, as you both weave through the crowd to get to the stairs. Just as you’re about to step onto the first stair, a blonde girl suddenly grabs your arm, pulling you back with unexpected force.

“Excuse me?” you say, furrowing your brow at the girl, your confusion evident. Rafe pulls you protectively against him, his grip tightening as his anger flares. “What the hell is your problem?” he demands, his voice sharp and furious.

The girl stands before you, her appearance a stark contrast to her fury. Tears stream down her face, her hair a tangled mess, and her lipstick smeared across her chin. Her hands tremble as she points a finger accusingly at you. “Your brother is the biggest fucking douche I’ve ever met!” she shouts, her voice cracking with emotion.

You and Rafe exchange incredulous glances, both stunned by her outburst. The disbelief in your eyes mirrors Rafe’s as you struggle to process the situation. “I’m sorry, who exactly are you?” you ask, raising an eyebrow. She scoffs, “Caroline, your brother’s girlfriend! Or ex-girlfriend now, since he just dumped me for someone else!” she yells furiously.

You never supported your brother’s behavior of sleeping around and breaking up with girls left and right, but practically everyone on the island knew what kind of person he was. Topper was notorious for his inability to maintain a relationship for any length of time.

“What’s that got to do with me?” you ask, shrugging nonchalantly as her eye twitches in frustration. Rafe stands behind you, his hand resting on your hip, watching the scene unfold with amusement. “He’s—” Caroline begins, her voice rising in anger, but you cut her off sharply, “You knew what kind of guy my brother was, so why did you even bother?”

Caroline stands there in silence, her eyes darting around as the partygoers watch. She takes a hesitant step forward, and you raise an eyebrow, curious about her next move. Suddenly, her face contorts with a pained expression. She brings the back of her hand to her mouth, but it’s too late. She bends over, vomiting on the floor, causing a collective gasp from the crowd.

“Oh my god,” you mutter, stepping back quickly to avoid the spreading mess. Rafe, standing behind you, looks like he’s about to gag, his hand covering his mouth. You instinctively reach out and pat Caroline’s back, offering what little comfort you can as she remains hunched over.

“What’s going on here?” Topper’s voice booms as he pushes through the crowd. He reaches you, his eyes scanning the scene before landing on Caroline. He sighs loudly, fingers pressing into his temples as if to ward off a headache. “Shit,” he mutters under his breath.

Caroline slowly lifts her head, her eyes meeting Topper’s with a mix of anger and embarrassment. Without warning, she swats your hand away, straightens up, and runs off, disappearing into the crowd of partygoers. The crowd parts for her, whispering amongst themselves, while you and Rafe exchange a bewildered glance.

Topper stands there, rubbing his forehead, clearly frustrated. “Great, just great,” he mumbles. “Did you really have to break it off tonight?” You mutter, giving your brother an annoyed look as he rolls his eyes “Oh, I’m sorry, Princess. Did she ruin your shoes or something?” Topper lifts his hands up in mock surrender, his tone sarcastic. “Get fucked, Topper,” You scoff, “let’s go,” You pull Rafe with you.

"Good to see you, Top," Rafe pats his shoulder, a smile gracing his lips before he lets you walk him upstairs (walk him like a dog sis).

[keikikait]

ɢʀᴏᴡɪɴɢ ᴘᴀɪɴꜱ (ʀᴀꜰᴇ ᴄᴀᴍᴇʀᴏɴ x ꜰ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ)

this is part three. part two is here!

pairing: rafe cameron x kook!f!reader, (not au, both are early to mid 20s)

word count: 6.7k

summary: rafe can't go on without you

warnings: ANGST!!!!, no smut but suggestive, reader is a little high in the beginning, pushy rafe, mild violence (throwing stuff + a little fight), jealousy???, cheating mention, angry rafe, crying, not proofread

a note: i'm so sorry this is late!

please reblog and like, it means a lot! let me know what you think!

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ✧

Why didn’t you want him anymore?

Did he do something wrong?

Rafe thought everything was fine. You had talked it out, worked through your problems, and now you were going to move on like he wanted you to. You two watched your movie, you cuddled up against his side, his hand drawing random shapes on the skin of your arm. It felt like the old times, when you would watch three movies in a row, and you would fall asleep with your head on his lap and his hands in your hair. He would carry you to his bed, ignoring the feelings in his gut, ignoring the blood rushing somewhere south, and ignoring everything that had to do with you. 

He looked down at you as you lean against his chest, arms around his hips. He bites the inside of his cheek and shifts, pulling his sweatpants down from around his crotch. He didn’t want you to notice it. 

He had Sofia now, why was he thinking like this again?

He wanted you to stay with him, needed you to stay, but you wouldn’t. You had given him some half-assed excuse that you had to run errands, and that something was wrong with your car, but he didn’t believe you. He didn’t want you to leave him, abandon him like everyone else, like he was a piece of trash discarded in the gutter on the side of the road. Rafe was hurting, watching the way you cringed and pulled away and the way you tensed when he touched you. You couldn’t leave him, it wasn’t fair. 

Rafe tried to hug you as you grabbed your bag and your keys, but you shrugged him off, quickly rushing out of his front door and slamming it behind you. He stood there for a few seconds, hesitating, before slipping on his shoes and grabbing his keys. He shouldn’t have chased after you, and he shouldn’t have followed you all the way to The Boneyard, and he definitely shouldn’t be watching you with JJ. He crouches behind one of the rocks, watching quietly as JJ wraps his arms around your shoulder and pulls you closer.

Rafe watches you take a hit. He didn’t like that you were smoking with that Pogue fuck JJ. He didn’t like the way you were looking at JJ, like he was the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen.

You’re supposed to look at him like that. He shouldn’t be so jealous at the idea of you being with someone else, but he is. He needs you, in any way he can have you. He doesn’t want someone else to have you, to keep you, to take you away from him. He doesn’t want there to be someone else that would steal your attention away from him.

You take the joint from JJ and take a hit before handing it back, holding it in your lungs before exhaling slowly. You look up at him, watching as he puts the joint in his mouth as he shifts in the sand. You smile softly again, admiring the way his eyes shine in the pink and orange hues of the setting sun.

JJ can’t resist. He brushes his nose against your cheek, gently kissing your skin. It’s soft, gentle, the most intimate thing he’ll allow himself to do without it feeling like cheating on Kiara. Did you even know that they had gotten back together? His fingers slowly run through your hair, the touch so soft, so light that you can barely even feel it.

“Thanks for being here.” You say.

He smiles softly, rubbing your arm reassuringly, continuing to comb his fingers through your hair. “No need to thank me. You know I’ll be here for you whenever you need,” He says, leaning his head against yours. “Anytime, anywhere.” He swallows hard, feeling his heart thump. The way you were looking at him, so sweet, so grateful, he wanted so badly to kiss you. But that wouldn’t be fair to you. Kissing you wouldn’t be fair to her.

You close your eyes, feeling the sun shining on your face. You sigh, pressing your cheek against him. He closes his eyes as well, taking a deep breath in through his nose. He loved having you this close, so close to him that he can feel your heartbeat.

In moments like this, he had almost wished he had met you before Kiara.

Your eyes open when you feel him shift around on the sand. Your gaze flickers to his hands, the joint between his pointer and middle finger, before looking up at him. “You okay?”

JJ looks back at you, noticing how you looked so calm. You were so relaxed, it was like you were on a cloud. He smiles. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m okay.” He answers, bringing the joint back to his mouth to take a hit to suppress the thumping of his heart.

You nod, smiling softly. Your eyes move from his eyes down to his lips just briefly before meeting his gaze again. He catches you watching his lips. He notices that slight glance, only for a millisecond, and he feels a little tingle in his stomach. He’s always been so observant, noticing everything. He lets out a soft sigh, a puff of smoke escaping as he does so. His eyes flick down and linger on your lips for longer than a second, your mouth looking so sweet, so soft. 

He swallows hard, his eyes locking with yours again as he watches the pink and orange light of the sunset cast a glow across your face.

“JJ…” You whisper.

He leans in closer, the hand wrapped around your shoulder, pulling you in closer. He can feel your body heat against his, and he can’t resist any longer. His gaze drifts between your eyes and your mouth, flicking back and forth as he fights his growing temptation. He doesn’t look away from your mouth when he responds. “Yeah?” He replies softly.

You don’t respond, meeting his eyes again before looking back at his lips. His heart thumps in his chest. He can see the way you’re looking at him, and the way your eyes keep flitting down to his mouth. He can’t look away, not when you looked like that, so sweet, so beautiful, so good. 

He takes another hit from the joint he was holding. He doesn’t look away from you as he does, grabbing your cheeks with one hand and bringing you closer as he inhales the smoke. He pushes your lips open, leaning in close to exhale the smoke into your mouth.

It’s so simple, so intimate, and it makes your head spin. Your eyes soften and you squirm, and JJ notices. He can feel you squirming, fidgeting with the closeness of his body. He feels something in his chest, warm and tingles. How are you making everything so difficult? 

He sets the joint down in the sand to free up his other hand, bringing it to the side of your neck to rub his thumb against your jaw. It’d just be easier to tell you all of his conflicting thoughts, all of his feelings he refuses to admit, but he can’t. He can’t, not when you’re looking at him like this.

JJ sighs, leaning in close, and your eyes close as your lips brush--

“Hey!”

Your eyes open, looking over JJ’s shoulder. Your eyebrows furrow. “Rafe?” JJ quickly jerks his head back, letting go of you like you’ve burned him, as he sees Rafe standing on the other side of the rock. His heart rate doubles, racing, his cheeks red from the rush of adrenaline that comes over him.

You had finally decided to try to move on and here he was, the island’s prince. Your prince. 

Rafe stares at the two of you from his hiding spot, his eyes focused on how close JJ had been to you, how he had been touching your neck, how he had been about to kiss you. He stomps through the sand, right up to both of you. “What the fuck?”

JJ scrambles up off of the sand to his feet, facing Rafe. He crosses his arms, standing his ground. “What the hell, dude?” 

Rafe glares at JJ, taking a step forward. “I could ask you the same thing. Is this what you do now? Kiss other girls and cheat on Kie? I knew you weren’t good enough for her.”

You stand up, feeling more angry than heartbroken. “You’re still with Kiara?”

JJ looks like he was just slapped across the face, a look of guilt and shame sweeping across his expression. “I uh--” He stutters, shifting in the sand. He hates that look on your face, so disgusted and disappointed. He hates the way he looks right now, guilty and ashamed of how far things had just gone between himself and you. 

“What the fuck, JJ?” You say exasperatedly, stepping back. “What the fuck?” 

“Listen, I was just--”

“You were just what?” Rafe steps forward, pushing his way between you and JJ. He glares at JJ, taking one more step and getting in his face. “Don’t you dare bullshit your way out of this, you Pogue fuck. I saw it with my own eyes, you tried to cheat on Kie with my best friend. You’re not good enough for Kie, and you’re not good enough for her,” Rafe looks over at you. “I tried warning you about this asshole. Why doesn’t anyone on this shitty island listen to me?”

You stick your hands up in mock surrender. “Okay, I’m not dealing with either of you. Sort out your weird personal beef and leave me out of it.”

“No, you don’t get to walk away. This involves you,” Rafe snaps, grabbing your arm. “Why the hell did you let him touch you? Why did you let him almost kiss you?”

“Why do you care?” You ask, pulling your arm away. His nails scratch against your skin, leaving five little red lines on your skin.

“Why do I care?” Rafe repeats your question, a look of pure disbelief on his face. “Because you’re mine. You’re my best friend, and I’m not gonna let an ass like this use you, make you look like a fool, and cheat on his girlfriend at the same time.”

“I’m not yours, Rafe. I’m not property you get to own.” You say.

Rafe falls silent, taking a step back. He can’t believe this is happening. He can’t believe you were saying this, saying that you were someone else’s, or that you were no one’s at all. He hates the look on your face, the way your voice sounds, so angry, upset. 

He hates that he’s the reason you’re feeling this way. 

“I know you’re not,” He says. “But for all intents and purposes, you’re my best friend. You’re the closest thing I got to family, and I’m gonna take care of you. Hell, I already do. Do you think JJ’s gonna take care of you? No. He’s gonna treat you like a goddamn rag and toss you away. Don’t let someone like him treat you like that. Not when you deserve better.”

“You don’t take care of me,” You say, trying to stay as calm as possible. “You immediately ditched me when you got with Sofia. You always ditch me when you find a new girl to play with.”

“I didn’t ditch you, I was trying to make you move on.” Rafe snaps back, also trying his hardest to keep his cool. It was difficult, especially when you were looking at him like that, so angry and hurt and disappointed.

You laugh. He has to be messing with you, right? “You want me to move on, but you want me to be yours?”

“You know what I mean,��� Rafe snaps, trying to keep his cool as he crosses his arms across his chest, his fingers digging into his arms. “I don’t want you to keep pining for me. I don’t want you to ruin your life, hoping that one day I’ll wake up and want to be with you. I want you to do good, and I want you to go find someone who will actually love and care about you.”

“Well, good to know it’s not either of you,” You say bitterly, looking between Rafe and JJ. “Maybe it’s no one on this island,” You step away, clutching your sandals in your hand as the sun finally sets over the horizon. “I’m out. Have fun arguing with each other.”

You walk through the sand and over the dunes, heading back towards the main part of the beach. Rafe watches silently as you storm off. He wants nothing more than to call after you, to go racing after you and tell you that he cares, that he wants the best for you, that he’s been so damn selfish. But he says nothing, his mind racing with too many different thoughts and feelings. He can’t find the words.

JJ takes a small step towards him. “Please, man, please don’t tell Kie. Please.”

Rafe sighs, his shoulders dropping as he watches you walk away. He just waves JJ off before taking off behind you, fists clenched at his side as he calls your name. You ignore him, walking down the dune and trying not to stumble, the weed just starting to hit you. He keeps calling your name, over and over, and you’ve never hated the word more.

Your fists clench and you spin around. “What?!”

He skids to a halt, a few feet between the two of you. He stares at you for a moment, his face still a mask of anger and annoyance, hiding the guilt and regret gnawing at his gut. He grits his teeth before replying. “Where the hell are you going?”

“Home, I don’t know,” You sigh. “Away from you.”

“You didn’t let me finish.” He says, his tone dropping from the edge of anger to something calmer after getting a good look at you. He’s seen you angry before, but not like this. 

You’d never looked at him like that before, with such raw heartbreak, disappointment. You’d always been so fond, soft, loving with him. And now you looked like you hated him. Did you?

“Finish what?” You ask. “Insulting me? Making fun of me for being stupid enough to fall in love with you?”

“No, you idiot,” He snaps, the words coming out a little harsher than he meant for them to. “I wasn’t done trying to explain myself. But you just walked off without letting me explain, like you always do. You never give me a chance.”

“Quit calling me an idiot!” You say, your voice cracking. “I’ve given you so many chances, Rafe. So many fucking chances.”

He hesitates, noticing you were beginning to cry. He’d never seen you cry before. He didn’t think he could feel any worse. “Please, just let me talk.” He says, his tone soft as he takes a step closer to you. He hated how small your voice sounded when you yelled.

“All you do is talk,” You say. “And I’m tired of it. You never let me talk. You never let me say what I want to say. It’s always about you.”

“I know I’m selfish. And I know I’ve been the biggest bastard to you. I know I haven’t been the best person to you,” He says, closing the distance between the two of you as he takes a few more steps closer. “Just let me talk. Let me say just one thing before you hate me.”

“Even after everything, I couldn’t hate you,” You say. “I’m just upset, Rafe. I’m upset that it’s come to this. I’m upset that I even admitted my feelings to you in the first place.”

“Don’t say that,” He pleads, his voice cracking as he puts a hand on your shoulder, the touch soft and comforting compared to his usual rougher touches. “Please don’t say that you regret it. I can’t stand to hear you say that.”

“It’s done us no good,” You say, fingernails digging into your palms to stop the tears. “Things will never be the same again.”

“I know, I know it won’t be,” Rafe says. “But don’t ever take it back. Please, I need you, alright? But you deserve better. You deserve someone who’ll give you what you need, what I can’t. I can’t be that person.”

“Quit rubbing it in, please,” You say pathetically, bottom lip trembling as you start to cry. “I know I’m not good enough for you. I know I’m not what you want, I know I’m not what you need. I know I’m not the one you love.”

“This isn’t about you being good enough for me,” His hand tightens on your shoulder, his fingers digging into your skin. “You’re the closest thing I’ve ever had to family. You’re smart, loyal, and you care enough about me to deal with all of my bullshit for so long. Anyone here would be lucky to have you. I would be lucky to have you. But I don’t deserve you, not when I can’t give you what you want.”

“All I’ve ever wanted was you, Rafe,” You say. “Even now, I still want you.”

He swallows hard, his throat bobbing. He can feel his heart sinking to his stomach as you look up at him, tears streaming down your face. He wants nothing more than to push you back against the nearest tree and kiss you right now. The way you’re looking at him, so vulnerable and needy, it makes his entire body ache. 

He fights to control himself, to keep himself in check. He won’t let his desires overtake his better judgement. Not again. It took him so long to move on. “But I’m no good for you. I can’t give you what you need. Not the attention, not the love, not the time or the care or anything like that. I’m selfish, and I’m broken, and you deserve better than me.”

“I was trying to move on,” You say. “I sure do know how to pick guys who are in relationships.”

“And that’s just it. You keep picking the wrong guys. You keep picking assholes like me who don’t care about how you feel. And it drives me crazy, knowing you keep setting yourself up like this.” He grips tighter, his fingers digging into your shoulder, holding you in place.

You sway slightly, the weed fully hitting you. “I should go home.”

“I’m not letting you drive home when you’re half-baked. You’d end up running into a tree or something,” He says, noticing you swaying. “And I’m not letting you walk home.”

“I don’t wanna go home with you.” You mumble.

He knows that. He knows that you wouldn’t ever want to hang out with him now. He can’t help but notice how vulnerable you look, like you were completely broken down. Like all you wanted was a hug and someone to take care of you. Against better judgement, his hands come up, gently grabbing your shoulders and pulling you closer. “Please just come stay with me for the night. You can have the guest room, I promise I won’t push anything on you. Please.”

“No,” You try to shove him off, but your arms feel like they weigh a thousand pounds. “Wanna go home.”

“You’re in no condition to drive, or walk,” He says, holding you steady as you push on his chest. “Look at you. You’re high out of your mind, you’re exhausted, and you’re upset. You’re clearly not in the position to make the best decisions for yourself.”

“How do you know what’s good for me?” You ask, trying to push him off again.

“I know that you’re not in a good headspace right now, alright?” He snaps. “And I know that if I let you go home, you’re gonna lock yourself in your apartment for the night and wallow in your own self-pity. And trust me, I know you well enough to know that’s not good for you.”

“I don’t wanna be with you.” You say.

“I know.” He says, pulling you in even closer so you’re practically pressed against his chest. “Just let me take you to my house. Just let me make sure you’re safe and that you go to sleep. I swear that’s all I want. I just want to know that you’re safe. Please.”

“You don’t care about me,” You say, successfully squirming out of his grip. “You never did. You’re just using me. You like keeping me around, all whipped and pining, don’t you?”

“You seriously think I like seeing you like this?” Rafe snaps, grabbing onto your arm as you squirm away from him. “You seriously think I like watching you go out on dates with guys who aren’t good enough for you, watching you get attached to any and everyone who shows you any sort of attention? Do you really think that I’m getting some sort of kick out of knowing that I’m the reason you’re crying right now?”

“Yes,” You say, tugging your arm away. “You don’t love me. You never did. This entire friendship, or whatever you want to call it, is just some big game to you, isn’t it?”

“You’re so wrong,” He says, stepping forward to grab your arm again. “You have no idea how wrong you are. And I’m sick of letting you think that I’m the same selfish, heartless, self-absorbed, bastard that I’ve always been. Because I’m not like that when it comes to you. When it comes to you, I’m nothing like that. I care about you so damn much.”

“Stop touching me!” You scream, pushing his chest. “I don’t like it when you touch me!”

He staggers back, looking at you like you’d just slapped him in the face. He has never heard you yell like that. And he definitely has never heard those words come out of your mouth. He’s seen you flinch at his touch before, sure, but he thought that was because you were nervous, or anxious. Not because you hated it. Especially not when it was him.

You angrily wipe your eyes, trying not to cry. Had you really been this stupid for so long? Rafe could never love you, he could never love anyone else but himself. He didn’t have the heart for it. “When Sofia eventually dumps you,” You manage to say, taking a step back. “Don’t come crying to me about it. I won’t be there for you.”

“Don’t say that,” He says, the words sounding harsh and pained coming from his lips as he tries to close the distance between the two of you again. “Don’t you ever say that, alright? I need you, and you need me. Stop pretending like you don’t. Don’t ever just turn your back on me, because I can’t lose you. We're supposed to grow old together.”

“Grow without me.” You say.

“Don’t say that,” He snaps, shaking his head. “You don’t mean that. You can’t mean something that shitty. We’ve been best friends for so long, I’ve been there for you through everything. You can’t just throw in the towel. You can’t just walk away and decide that you never want anything to do with me again. I care about you.”

“I can’t do this anymore, Rafe. I can’t pretend it doesn’t hurt anymore.” You say.

“And you think it doesn’t hurt me?” He asks, watching you move farther away from him. “Do you have any idea how much it hurts to watch you go out with other guys? Do you have any idea how much I hate seeing you get attached to those loser Pogue dickheads who will never love you as much as I do?”

“Why can’t you love me the way I love you?” You start to cry. You feel so pathetic, constantly begging him to love you, but you need to hear it again. Anything to help you move on.

Rafe goes silent for a moment, his eyes fixed on your face. He’d never seen you look so broken, so desperate, so lost and in need of him. He hates himself for doing it to you, for forcing you to look like that. His chest heaves, slowly taking a step closer to you, closing the space between the two of you again.

“No,” You take a step back, bottom lip trembling. “No. You picked Sofia. Not me.”

“Stop,” He says, his gaze flicking down to your lip. “Just stop pushing me away, alright? You’re just hurting yourself. Why are you letting yourself get so upset, when you know I care about you this much? Just let me take you home with me tonight, so I know you’re safe and not locking yourself inside your apartment, wallowing in some self-inflicted heartbreak.”

“I need to move on, and this is how I do it.” You say, reaching up to wipe your tears.

“And you’re moving on by staying out late, high out of your mind?” He says, taking another step closer to you. “You’re gonna move on by getting attached to the next guy who gives you a lick of attention? I thought you were smarter than that.”

“I guess you didn’t know me as well as you thought you did,” You pull out your phone to call a taxi. “Maybe one day things will be different.”

“Bullshit,” He says, the words coming out harsher than he intended as he grabs your wrist, stopping you before you can call. “Stop, just stop. You’re high and half-tired, and you’re too emotional right now. Just listen to me. I’m not letting you go out there when you’re like this, alright? I’ll never forgive myself if something bad happens to you.”

“Don’t touch me,” You say, standing your ground. “I’m going home, and I’m going to move on. Maybe one day we can reconnect, and things will be different, but I can’t do this anymore, Rafe.”

He swallows hard, his fingers tight on your wrist. He hated how hard you were trying to stay strong and push him away. He hated how vulnerable you looked, when he knew that was all his fault. He hated how he couldn’t tell you any of the things he wanted to. He hated that he couldn’t be honest. And he hated that you were right, that he couldn’t let you go. He couldn’t give you up. He swallows hard again, letting go of your wrist. “Okay,” He sighs. “Fine. Go home.”

Rafe watches you walk away, away from him, into the parking lot towards your waiting taxi.

And he doesn’t know if he’ll see you ever again.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

Rafe is lost without you.

He tries to go on without you, tries to grow, but he can’t. He needs you around, even just at arms length, and he’s finding it hard to live without your smile and laugh in the background. He tries to fill the void with drugs, alcohol, partying, and even Sofia, but nothing works. 

Nothing compares to you.

A cold winter has passed, and the warmth of spring has almost arrived. With it, Rafe can feel himself crumbling. He hasn’t heard from you in weeks. His texts, calls, emails have all gone unanswered. He can’t force you to talk to him. He couldn’t force you into feeling anything. You had tried to grow and move on. And Rafe had been left behind, by you and by her.

He thinks about you constantly, constantly wondering where you are, what you’re doing, who you’re doing.  And the jealousy and rage it sparks in his chest every time fills him with disgust. He’s the reason you were doing this, the reason you weren’t with him. He had done this to himself.

Do you kiss him? Do you suck his dick, looking up at him with your big, wide eyes? Do you moan his name into his ear while he fucks you deep? Do you let him in raw? Do you shake and shudder when you cum around him?

Does he want to know?

He spends his days high on cocaine, kissing and fucking random girls and imagining it's you, and his nights at the new bar in Figure 8, The Hazy Sailor. Rafe opens up his fourth beer, shoving the bottle cap into his pocket and bringing the amber glass to his lips. He looks around from his spot at the bar, eyes drifting towards the entrance.

He immediately sees you, your smile gleaming under the soft light.

For a second, it’s like the air is sucked from his lungs. The beer bottle almost falls from his hand, but he catches it at the last moment before it hits the floor, staring at you across the room. He can feel a painful lump in his throat, his heart aching to see you again. Even when you weren’t his, you were beautiful. He watches you step into the bar, dressed beautifully, looking flawless as always. He watches the other people around you, the guys in particular, their eyes roaming over your body and taking in every inch of you.

You’re on some other Kook’s arm. Is this the guy you fuck? Do you still think about him when you cum?

Before he can think, your name tumbles out of his mouth, and you look over at him. Your face falls ever so slightly. “Oh, hey Rafe.”

His chest tightens when he hears your voice, and his jaw goes slack when you look over at him. He feels like he’s going to die. He didn’t know how much he had missed the sound of your voice. He swallows hard, setting his beer down on the bar. “Hey,” He says, feeling awkward. He has a hundred different things that he wants to say to you, but he doesn’t know how to say any of them.

“Oh, uh, this is Nathan,” You say, introducing the two of them. “Nathan, this is Rafe.”

Rafe forces a smile, stepping closer. He hates the sound of this guy’s name in your mouth. He offers a hand to shake, clenching his jaw until his teeth ache. “Nice to meet you, Nathan.”

“The infamous Rafe? The best friend?” Nathan chuckles, shaking his hand. “Heard a lot about you, man.”

“All good, I hope,” Rafe says through gritted teeth. His eyes flick over to you. He can’t help but wonder what you’ve said about him. Did you tell him about all of his shitty moments, or had you only told him the good bits? “So, uh, you guys dating?”

“No, we haven’t had that conversation yet.” You answer before Nathan can, getting your ID out of your wallet.

“Interesting,” He says, his shoulders dropping a little. For some reason, hearing you say that out loud had made him relax just a little bit, even though it was stupid. He shouldn't feel relieved. You weren't his. You never would be. He looks at you again. You looked so nice tonight. He knew the bar wasn't exactly fancy, but he could tell you put more effort into your appearance. “You look nice.”

“Thanks, Rafe,” You say, a small smile on your face. “It’s a new dress.”

“Yeah, I can see that.” He says, letting his eyes trail down your body. He can't help it. He can't help the way his gaze lingers on your breasts, or the way he feels a dull aching in his chest. He missed you. You looked so good like that. Dressed up, looking beautiful, in a bar full of guys who didn't deserve you. Guys who didn't appreciate everything that you were, guys who weren't good enough for you.

Nathan wraps his arm around your hips, tugging you closer. “I would appreciate it if you didn’t ogle her, man.”

There’s a beat of silent as he registers Nathan’s words, his gaze flicking over to him. Something dark and ugly fills his chest. He can feel his muscles tensing as he stares right at your supposed date. “Yeah? I’d appreciate it if you didn’t put your hands on her,” Rafe says, his voice dripping with venom. “She’s not a damn piece of meat, alright?”

“Well, I can do whatever I want with her,” Nathan says. “You can’t.”

That’s the breaking point. Rafe steps closer, eyes narrowing into a glare as he stares right at your date. He’s had just about enough. “I’d like to see you try.”

“Rafe, come on,” You put your hand on his chest. “It’s fine, just stop--”

Rafe suddenly falls over, knocking over a few barstools, the beer bottle in his hand falling and shattering on the ground.

Nathan hit first.

The second Rafe sees the fist connect with his side, he loses it. He immediately throws himself at Nathan, a roar of rage escaping his lips as they tumble to the ground. His anger fuelled him as he swings blindly, fists and elbows hitting any part of Nathan they can find. Nathan fights back, pushing back against Rafe, the sound of knuckles hitting flesh echoing through the bar. It doesn’t take long for bar security to come and pull the two apart, pushing them into separate corners to calm down.

You’re just stood there, completely shocked, unable to move, unable to speak. Rafe pushes the security guards away, stomping his way out of The Hazy Sailor, his dirt bike roaring and echoing through the now quiet bar as he peels off. 

You look at Nathan as he sits in the corner, eye bruised and lip cut.

You should go to him. 

But you can’t.

You grab your bag and leave, getting in your car to follow Rafe.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆

He’s home, thankfully.

The door is wide open, broken glass and vases littering the entryway as you carefully step through, thankful to whoever’s listening that you decided to wear sneakers tonight. You walk through the house quietly, heading towards his kitchen, hearing more glasses smash. “Rafe?”

He looks over from where he is standing in the middle of his kitchen, hands shaking as they grip a glass that was recently full of expensive whisky. He didn’t have the mind to even clean up the broken glass that is covering the counter and floor in front of the sink. “What are you doing here?” He asks, his voice low and harsh. He feels pathetic, the way you’re looking at him. Pity. Fear. Disgust.

“Are you okay?” You ask softly, getting closer.

“I’m fine,” He says, sounding gruff and trying to put up a cold front. He hates that you’re looking at him like that. Like he’s some broken little kid who just needs someone to hold his hand and care for him. He hates that his chest aches, looking at you like this. So concerned and worried. “Leave, alright? I don’t need you here.”

“Do you want me to call Sofia for you?” You ask.

He pauses, feeling his chest tighten as you mention her name. Great. Even though you had seen him get into a fight in the bar for you, seen him nearly break a guy’s nose, seen him act like a jealous idiot, you were still bringing up her name. “Why, because you think she’ll care? You think she’d actually show up?” He asks, letting his anger start to slip into his tone.

Your eyebrows furrow. “Has something happened?”

“Doesn’t matter,” He mutters, swallowing hard. “Just leave it alone, alright?” He can’t do this. He can’t deal with your pity, your soft voices and concern. It only makes things worse for him. Makes him think things that he shouldn’t be thinking. “Why did you even follow me home?” He tries to keep his voice steady as he looks at you.

“I was worried,” You say. “Rightfully so,” You get closer, reaching out to take the broken whisky tumbler out of his hand. “Are you gonna tell me what happened between you and Sofia?”

The second your fingers brush against his, his hands immediately loosen, letting you take the glass from his hand. The feel of your touch makes him shiver, his pulse starting to pound in his ears. He doesn’t know how much longer he can keep this going. “Why do you want to know?” He asks, looking right into your eyes. “Is it because you care?”

“‘Course I do.” You say.

He swallows hard, feeling a lump in his throat. Why are you like this? He hates that you still care about him. Hates how badly he needs you to keep caring. “She uh,” Rafe sniffles. “She cheated.”

Oh, shit. “Did she?” You ask. 

His jaw tightens as he nods. “Yup. With a bunch of different guys, actually,” A bitter, angry laugh slips past his lips. “Guess I should have known better. I’m just someone to pass the time with until something better comes along.”

At least he knows how you feel now. “I’m sorry, Rafe.”

He looks away, unable to keep looking at you when you were being kind to him. When you were being so good and understanding, and it was all too much. “Don’t apologise. She stole $2,000 from me, too. Weirdly enough, that one didn’t hurt.”

“What the fuck?” You ask.

He laughs, leaning back and letting his head fall against the cabinets. “Yeah, well, apparently when you’re high on coke all the time, you leave your cash in a lot of places. She found my emergency stash, cleaned me out, and left. But at least the bastard that was in bed with her got punched in the face.”

You sigh, reaching out to touch his hand. “I’m sorry, Rafe.”

He feels his fingers twitch the second you touch his hand, the feeling of your skin on his making goosebumps break out across his arms. He swallows hard, forcing himself to remain still, even when everything inside him is begging to reach out and grip your wrist. “Stop apologising,” He says. “It’s not your fault. You didn’t cheat on me, you didn’t steal my money. You’re not the one I’m mad at, alright? So stop apologising.”

You take a shaky breath, regretting your words before they even leave your mouth. “Do you need a hug?”

The second you say it, it’s like a switch goes off in his head. He’s taking a step forward before he can think, pulling you against his chest and wrapping his arms around your body. His pulse is racing in his ears, his breath coming in heavy as he presses his face down into your neck, breathing you in. You felt so damn good, right against him like that. How much he’d missed that.

You rub his back, one hand going up to cup the back of his head, your voice soft. “I’m here, Rafey. It’s okay.”

Fuck, he’d missed that. Your voice, your touch, your smell. He feels tears spring to his eyes almost as soon as you start touching him, his hands balling into a fist in your shirt. He doesn’t know how much longer he can keep himself together like this, fighting the wave of emotion that keeps threatening to break through the surface.

“Don’t cry,” You whisper, pressing a soft kiss against his temple. “Don’t cry.”

You whispering in his ear, against his skin, is the last straw for him. The sound of your soothing voice, the feel of your lips on his face, is enough to break that final wall, that final dam that’s been holding back his emotions. His grip on you tightens, his arms pulling you even closer as he lets out a shaky breath against your skin. “Fuck,” He murmurs, his voice breaking like glass. “I miss you. I missed you being with me. I needed you, and I need you still.”

“You have me.” You whisper, rubbing his back.

He swallows hard, feeling tears rolling down his cheeks, pooling against your neck. It feels so good, yet so fucking painful, hearing you say that. That kind, caring voice of yours whispering in his ear, and telling him that you’re here, that you’re still his. “Please,” He begs, his voice broken and cracking in his throat. “Don’t leave me again. Don’t ever leave me again, alright?”

You can’t help it. You can’t resist him. “I won’t.”

Rafe pulls away, wiping his cheeks with the back of his hand before cupping your face. He whispers your name, stroking your cheeks with his thumbs.

“Yeah?” You ask, your voice still a hushed whisper.

He purses his lips, his eyes welling with tears again. “I think I love you.”

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ*:･ﾟ✧

the epilogue is here

★taglist: @ietss, @teenwolfbitches28, @momoewn, @blairsblg, @gilwm, @drewsphswife, @odairtrqsh, @watchmerora, @wearemadeofstardust0, @rafesbabygirlx, @slumnit, @evermorx89, @ivy-34, @ts1mp0ne, @drewstarkeysstuff, @kayreblogs, @rafeycameronsgf, @lulbabes, @xomarryamox, @montanajgbn, @monkey-d-juliana, @koalalafications, @stylestarkey, @loves0phelia, @lhhlver, @user381953, @wintergirlysstuff, @emberaurora, @wtfisastiles, @bluejeepgirl11, @artistadistrada2002, @fastlovela, @lucifersie, @marlenee3e, @koibleufish, @babygirlwilly, @dasia21, @karmasloverrr, @greyswaren, @tini5, @witchmoon10, @xcinnamonmalfoyx, @arivh, @devils-blackrose, @goldsainz, @vonhoe, @ursogorgeous1313, @exhaustedbutelated, @enjoymyloves, @rinasauruss, @danikasthings, @danicl25, @maybankslover, @rafeeeeeeee, @dreamygirli3, @girlgreeneyedgirrl, @ravenmedows, @outlawedmando, @abarelyexistentbeing, @immalosersblog, @rafecameronswifeyy, @cwufst (italics means i couldn't tag you!)

[featherandferns]

surfs up (fic)

jj maybank x fem!reader | part of the F.W.B universe, but can be read as a standalone too!

content warning: drug use; mentions/discussions of sex

word count: 4k.

blurb: you meet JJ's friends. whilst Kiara and Sarah grill you about your boyfriend, John B and Pope are still trying to wrap their heads around the fact that you've managed to tie JJ down.

The mirror could do with a clean. You look past the smudges and marks on the glass to focus on parting your hair with a comb. It’s freshly washed and wet, dripping down your bare back.

“Do you have to do that naked? It’s like torture,” JJ complains from the bed.

You don’t look away from your handy work as you reply. “You know, if we go to war, and you get captured, you’re in for a big shock.”

JJ hurls a pillow towards you and it hits you in the side before you have time to dodge, making you laugh.

“I don’t understand why you’re styling your hair anyway. We’re going surfing,” he says.

“I always style my hair.”

“I don’t get why. I mean, I never style mine."

Turning around to take him in, you reply, sarcastically, “you don’t say.”

JJ’s laid on his back on the bed, naked save from his boxers, eyes closed, his hair pointing in any which way. You know that for him, getting ready will consist of switching into some swim shorts, pulling on one of the many tee-shirts on the floor (that won’t stay tidy, no matter how hard you try), and shoving a cap over his unruly hair. You watch as his hand lazily searches for another pillow to toss, coming up short. A vape gets thrown instead, hitting your thigh.

“Ow.”

“Sorry.”

Looking back to the mirror, you thread the comb through some strands, encouraging them to fall the right side of your head.

“Your hair's just gonna get wet anyway. I don’t know why you’re bother-Oh.”

“What?” you grumble, not liking how his voice has suddenly dropped off. He doesn’t reply. Starts giggling to himself like a schoolgirl. You roll your eyes, looking to him again. “What?”

“You tryn’a look pretty for my friends?”

“Shut up.”

“You are! You wanna look pretty for when you meet them!”

“Shut up!” you repeat, louder. Your face is flushing hot with embarrassment. “I just wanna make a good first impression.”

“Babe, they're so chill, you could walk in half naked and it’d make a good impression. I mean, you basically already did with John B.”

“Please don’t remind me of that,” you whine.

The comb gets dumped on the dresser. JJ’s grinning at you from the bed – you can see his pearly whites reflecting in the mirror – and you somehow refrain from rolling your eyes again. Okay, sure, maybe you are spending a bit more time than usual on how you look and are overthinking how you’re going to dress for this chill-out-surf-day on the beach…But you want JJ’s friends to like you. Think good of you.

JJ hasn’t let up on teasing you. In silent retaliation, when you reach down to collect a tee shirt from the ground, you make a show to bend over forwards, the back of your legs facing him. JJ groans.

“That’s just mean.”

“What is?” you ask innocently, standing upright again, tee shirt in hand.

“You’re not playing fair,” JJ tells you.

Smirking, you open a dresser draw and shove in the tee. There’s no point wasting time folding it, as it’s only going to end up on the bedroom floor again by tomorrow. Opening the second drawer, you dig through your clothes that have gradually accumulated in JJ’s room at the chateau. Digging out a two-piece and a pair of shorts, you move to get dressed.

“Do you think we got time for a quickie?” JJ asks.

You bark out a laugh. “We really don’t.”

“Sure we do. Please.”

“Are you seriously begging me to have a quickie with you-” you glance to the bedside table’s clock, reading the time “-ten minutes after we said we’d meet your friends outside?”

JJ shrugs, sitting up. “I’m very fast.”

“That’s usually not the kind of thing guys brag about,” you remind him.

Your shorts are on now, and you reach around to tie the back of your bikini top.

“I’m serious. In and out, I swear. Two minutes tops.”

“And they say romance is dead.”

“Baby…”

“JJ,” you mimic. “No means no.”

He grunts and flops back on the bed, dramatic. You grab at another tee shirt on the floor (I mean, are these things multiplying?) and toss it at him. It lands on his face and he groans.

“Get dressed. I’m gonna brush my teeth.”

“Boo.”

You laugh to yourself as you walk out his bedroom, into the bathroom. As you brush, you inspect your face for any blemishes, and your hair for any stray strands which have fallen away. There’s a nervous thrum in your chest, over-layed with excitement; similar to the kind you get before a match.

You know JJ’s friends are far from snobbish. They’re perhaps the most easy-going people on earth. But earning their approval weirdly means a lot to you. Maybe it’s because JJ doesn’t seem very close with his family – at least, he never talks about them with you – so this feels akin to meeting the parents. You also have a sense that his friends inform a lot of his thoughts and decisions, and so if you were to slip up, maybe they’d somehow convince him to leave you. Whilst the pair of you have only been official for a couple of weeks, nearing to a month, you already feel how attached you’re becoming to him. How you save your dirtiest jokes for him and make a mental note of any anecdote at work that you know will have him in stiches. And the sex is better than it ever was before.

By the time you’re done in the bathroom, JJ’s pulling on his boots. He’s dressed in an old work muscle-tee and some swim shorts (just as you suspected) and there’s a cap waiting on his bed. The red one. You smile, sit down and pick it up.

“Think this is my favourite one,” you tell him. You inspect the front and read the branding.

JJ takes it from you and places it on your head, pushing down on the lip of the cap so it blocks your vision. Makes you laugh.

“Looks good on you too,” he says. “Not as good as I look on you…”

“We’re not having a quickie, JJ.”

“Damn it. Ah well, worth a shot.”

You take off the cap and hand it back to him, getting up. JJ’s kicking your trainers towards you and you slide them on rather easy, without having to untie the laces. Then the two of you are heading out the house and out the front door. The butterflies that had momentarily let up in the bedroom are back, beating their wings in full force at the sight of his friends gathered around the back of the house. Kiara is sat in the hammock, scrolling on her phone, and Sarah is half-laying at her feet. Pope is lent against the tree. He’s talking to John B, who’s sat on one of the low deckchairs, eyes closed and nodding along. JJ whistles as the two of you approach, catching their attention. When their heads turn to look at you, it makes you think of hawks fixating on prey.

“Yo. Good to go?”

“Only been waiting for ten minutes,” Pope says.

“Wasn’t it Newton who said time is relative?”

“No. That was Einstein, genius,” Pope corrects.

JJ rolls his eyes. “Whatever. We’re here now.”

Sarah’s on her feet, walking over to you, smiling with a hand outstretched. “Hi! I’m Sarah!”

“Hi,” you smile, shaking her hand, introducing yourself. Kiara follows second. Pope nods at you from the tree, introducing himself, and John B gives a small wave.

“We’ve technically already met,” he says, making you laugh through your embarrassment.

“Technically.”

“Come on!” Kiara’s calling, half-way to the twinkie. “We’re missing all the good waves!”

“Who’s got the cooler?”

“Already packed."

"Yeah, we had some time to kill...”

“Boards?”

“Attached to the roof.”

“I mean, can you seriously not see them? You do have eyes, right?”

“Shut it, Pope.”

You tag behind the gang, barely following their constant banter, chuckling at the antics. It seems they have a routine. John B and Sarah climb in the front, the former sitting behind the steering wheel. Kiara slides open the back door and her and Pope climb in first, taking the back seat. JJ offers you a hand as you step in. You take the spot nearest the steering wheel – a strange box-like podium that you imagine is hollow for storage – whilst JJ slides the door shut. He sits near your feet, leant against the wall of the front seats. The engine has spluttered to life and the radio begins to play Marley. The gang gives a few whoops of excitement as you set off towards the beach, away from the marsh.

By the time you pull up to the beach, Pope has explained the theory of the universe; JJ and John B have gotten into a brief, fleeting argument about whether Atlantis could be real; Sarah reminisced about the last time she went surfing; and Kiara has gone on a semi-heated tangent about litter on the beaches. Your cheeks ache from smiling and laughing. Whilst you haven’t fully stuck your neck out yet to join in, you’re content just listening to the gang bicker and beam.

As the engine shuts off, JJ reaches down to squeeze a hand on your shoulder. “Ready to ruin your hair?”

Mirthfully, you roll your eyes. “Can’t look any worse than yours.”

Pope ooo’s at the burn whilst Kiara whistles lowly, grinning.

Then everyone’s getting to their feet, hopping out the car, retrieving gear and supplies to lug down onto the sand. JJ carries his board and the cooler, and you lug the paddle board and a tote bag of snacks. John B and Sarah settle on a good spot, just shy of the dunes, far enough from the water that there’d be plenty of time before the tide comes in to pack up and leave. As everyone starts to dump the stuff, Kiara pulls out a blanket to lay out. A speaker beeps to life and Pope connects. Classics ranging from the sixties through to the noughts begin to play, encapsulating the feeling of summer. It’s hot under the sun but not uncomfortable. There’s a slight breeze that could catch someone out with thinking they’d avoid a sunburn.

“Who’s up for some waves?” JJ asks, pulling off his tee.

“Hell yeah,” John B grins.

“I’m in,” Pope agrees.

Sarah’s situated herself on the rag-tag blanket, pulling out a nail file. “I’m gonna wait a bit longer.”

Kiara is pulling out a joint and lounging back on the sand. It’s answer enough that she’s skipping out for now.

You decide to stay with the girls; wait for the waves to build some more. The guys begin to race towards the water, JJ cracking a joke to John B that earns him a shove. You shake your head as you watch the trio go. Searching around in one of the tote bags, you retrieve a packet of pretzels chips and pull it open.

“Thanks for letting me tag along today,” you say to the two girls.

“What’d you mean tag along?” Kiara frowns.

“We’ve been begging to meet you ever since JJ started hooking up with you,” Sarah tells you.

You chuckle, sceptical. “Wait? Really?”

“Yeah!” the girls chorus, making the three of you laugh.  

“God, that boy is so whipped, it’s gross,” Kiara snorts.

“It’s adorable!” Sarah corrects.

Offering around the bag to the two of them, you frown. “I don’t know about whipped…”

“Girl, you didn’t hear him,” Sarah says, amused. “After you two had been hooking up for like two weeks, he started talking about you all the time. It was hilarious.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah, but he’d do it in a way that he didn’t realise he was. Like he’d just randomly have to add little bits and pieces about you into conversations,” Kiara continues.

“Thanks to him we know your favourite sandwich.”

“And your favourite colour.”

“Favourite TV show…”

“Alright, alright, I get it,” you laugh. Your face feels burning hot. Glancing out to the waves, spotting the three guys wading out on their boards, you smile to yourself. You never knew that. “That’s kinda sweet, actually.”

“So…he treating you well?” Kiara asks.

You look back to them and smile, nodding.

“It’s so weird for me. I don’t think I’ve ever felt this way about someone before. I mean, I’ve cared a lot for people, but only like my parents and stuff. And, for most people, you’re born with that sort of affection for them, you know? But with JJ…I just felt it sort of grow until I couldn’t imagine going a day without seeing him.”

The moment the words leave your mouth, you cringe. Laughing in spite of yourself, you add, “sorry. That was gross.”

“It was adorable!” Sarah is practically giddy. Kiara and you laugh. “We’ve been waiting for the right girl to get to him.”

“I knew he was a romantic at heart,” Kiara nods in agreement.

“Wait. Is he romantic?” Sarah asks, looking to you once more.

You grab another pretzel and eat it as you think.

“I guess. We’re not really the mushy-shit type couple. But he’s kind of thoughtful. Does these little things for me sometimes. Like, I told him that I used to have chocolate-covered strawberries with my nana on picnics when I was younger, and that they remind me of her. I don’t even know how it came up, really. But the next day he’d made me some as a surprise. It was kinda sweet.”

“No doy – his love language is acts of service,” Kiara shrugs. She flicks on her lighter.

“What’d you mean?”

“Like, he expresses his love and affection for people through actions,” she tells you. “I’m telling you, that’s what it is.”

“What are the other types of love language again?” Sarah wonders.

“Lemme think. There’s gift giving, words of affirmation…”

As Kiara continues to list them off, you look out to the water and mull it over. You catch sight of JJ surfing, dipping in and out of the waves, weightless like a feather, as if he were born and bred on the water. You’d played down the chocolate covered strawberries story. There was more to it then him just doing it out of the blue.

That night, the two of you had decided to watch a movie. An old classic came on – one of the Monroe films – and you went into this random spiel about how your nana used to be the biggest Monroe fan. That went into JJ asking about your family, and you nana, and you telling the chocolate strawberries story. You got a little tearful at the memory, knowing that you wouldn’t have a moment like that with her again, and JJ made a point to tell an embarrassing story from middle school gym to cheer you up. The night had gone on and you didn’t think much more of it. The next day, JJ texted you to meet him in the marsh. When you arrived, there was a blanket laid out and some snacks and drinks (mostly beer) laid out. He seemed somewhat embarrassed, as if worried it was too much. The two of you hadn’t really done an official date: mostly movie-nights and sometimes grabbing lunch purely out of hunger. But you’d never had someone do something like that for you. Then, bashful, he'd opened up a Tupperware and held it out to you, offering you a chocolate covered strawberry. Come to think, it might have been the most romantic thing anybody had ever done for you.

But telling the girls all of that felt like you might take something away from the memory. You knew JJ liked his reputation. You understood, having one of your own somewhat. The fact that he had done it without being prompted, out of the kindness of his heart and his feelings for you…It made you feel special and wanted. And what other feeling do humans crave from another, other than that? No. You’ll keep those details to yourself. They can just know about the strawberries.

“No, no, John B’s definitely a words of affirmation sort,” Sarah is saying pointedly.

Kiara’s shaking her head in disagreement. “Quality time, all the way.”

“Quality time’s Pope’s thing,” the blonde argues.

“He’s surprisingly really into words of affirmation, in his awkward Pope-ish way,” Kiara informs, taking a drag.

“Wait, I’m confused. Are you and Pope a thing?” you can’t help but ask Kiara.

She looks away from both you and Sarah as she takes another hit. The smell of weed is gradually building. “Not exactly.”

“That’s not a no,” Sarah grins, teasingly.

“And it’s not a yes,” she affirms, shooting a glare. It softens, as she struggles to find her words. “It’s a…”

“Complicated?” you offer.

She smiles at you, grateful. “Yeah. 'Complicated’.”

“I know complicated,” you chuckle. “Used to be the queen of complicated.”

“You mean like before you and JJ were official?” Sarah wonders.

You nod. Resting back on your bent arms, you sigh.

“It was so hard to tell where we stood sometimes. And whenever I’d try and start up a conversation about it, he’d get all weird and defensive and stuff.”

“Yep. That sounds like JJ,” Kiara chuckles, a little sadly.

“For the record,” Sarah chimes in. “I knew he liked you from the first time he got with you.”

“Oh?”

“Oh yeah. He just seemed lighter. Happier.”

“Sex does that to people,” you chuckle, brushing it off.

“No, I’m telling you. He was a goner from the start.”

“Did you forget the sandwich-colour-TV-show story?”

You laugh, waving them away. “I’m just pretty decent in bed, is all.”

“No kidding. You know what JJ says right?”

“Huh?”

“You don’t know!?”

“What? What don’t I know?” you worry, sitting up again.

Kiara and Sarah are making faces at each other, laughing. You confusion twists into anxiety that eases the moment Sarah looks at you again.

“Okay, okay, so we’re hanging out at the chateau one night, right?” she begins.

“And JJ’s drunk as a skunk, okay? Like really wasted.”

“And high.”

“Yeah, and high,” Kiara nods, chuckling at the memory. “So John B asks about who the girl he accidentally bumped into the hallway was, the other night.”

You throw your face into your hands with a groan. Are you ever going to live that down?

“Well, at first JJ tries to act all casual. Says you’re this side-chick he’s seeing,” Sarah continues.

“But for some reason, John B thinks that’s not the whole truth. So he starts pushing at him.”

“Eventually it all just kicks off until JJ lets slip that you’re the best sex he’s ever had,” Sarah finishes, smirking at you, almost like she’s proud.

You’re human. The indirect compliment goes straight to your head and makes it grow about ten times in size. Fighting and failing to hold off a grin, you check you heard them right.

“Really?”

The two girls nod enthusiastically.

“And, of course, we’ve never let him live it down,” Kiara smiles, sweet like a pageant queen.

Your teeth sink into your lower lip as you chuckle to yourself. This whole time, with his stupid little game of ‘best you’ve ever had?’ that he kicks up nearly every time the two of you hook-up, came from a part of him wondering if it was as good for you as it was for him. If he’s alone in feeling that way.

“I came up with the theory – which, proved to correct, might I add? – that the reason why the sex was so good is cause he had feelings for you,” Sarah proudly proclaims.

Kiara rolls her eyes as she says, “But you know JJ--”

The three of you chorus through a laugh: “deny, deny, deny.”

With that, all three of you are in hysterics. Your ribs begin to hurt from laughter. As you revel in the wonderful pain, you wonder if you’ve ever felt so at ease in your life before. It wasn’t that you didn’t have friends, but you didn’t have a group of them like this. Just people here and there who you could vent to and grab coffee with and such. But these girls liked you, and they found you funny, and they cared about what you had to say. Tied in with the added benefit of having JJ, everything felt like it was aligning just as it should.

Flopping back onto the towel, you smile at the afternoon sky. No clouds and no birds. Just endless, stretching blue.

“He’s the best sex I’ve ever had too,” you quietly confess.

The girls’ lingering giggles pause before kicking up, tenfold.

“Wait? Really?”

“Yeah,” you grin, nodding. He was. Easily. “But you tell him that, and I’ll deny it. I like that he doesn’t really know. Only has a hunch.”

“Oh yeah,” Kiara affirms. “We can’t ever give guys the satisfaction of thinking they’re actually good in bed.”

“It’s like the one thing we have,” Sarah winks.

The three of you collapse into giggles again.

~*~*~*~*~*

“What’d you think they’re talking about?” Pope asks, looking out to the shore at the girls.

The three guys are taking a moment to rest, sitting on their boards, legs dangling in the water. JJ can see you, lying on your back, basking in the sun. Sometimes your combined laughter is loud enough to travel out to the water. He feels like he can make out your distinct giggle easily.

“School maybe?” Pope continues to wonder.

“Dude, they’re one hundred percent talking about us,” JJ declares. “I bet my board on it.”

“You think so?”

“JJ’s right,” John B sighs, nodding. “I feel like Sarah and Kie have been dying to grill your girl for ages.”

JJ’s heart feels like it skips at beat at the phrase 'your girl. He never thought he’d hear someone say that to him. Never thought it would make him so happy to hear it. Huh.

“It’s weird seeing you in a relationship,” Pope says, as if reading his mind.

JJ frowns. “What? Like it’s hard to picture someone wanting to date me?”

“No, you moron. Hard to picture you settling for one girl. Honestly, I was worried you had nymphomania or something."

“Nympha-who-now?”

“It’s an addiction to sex,” Pope clarifies impatiently.

JJ grins, smug. “I mean, can’t say that I don’t have that.”

“JJ. Gross.”

“What? Like it’s a secret or something? You’re just jealous, Pope. Gotta get your dick wet,” JJ shrugs.

Now John B’s cringing. “Gross, JJ.”

“So conservative,” he jests, lying back on his board. Clasping his hands over his bare stomach that’s beginning to dry under the rays, he gazes up at the clear sky. “My girl treats me good. Not gonna apologise for bragging about it.”

“But you do you gotta do it in such a crude way?” Pope almost whines. JJ flips him off half-arsed.

“Never thought I’d see the day when JJ was pussy-whipped, but here I sit,” John B says. JJ flips him off too for good measure, then lets both arms flop back onto his stomach.

There’s your laugh again. Makes him smile.

“You guys like her though, right?” he can’t help but ask, after a moment of quiet. Nothing but the waves licking at the boards.  

“Yeah, man,” John B says.

“Course,” Pope seconds. “I think she’s a good match for you. And your out-of-control libido.”

“Pope, I swear to God, you say one more million-dollar-word and I’ll drown you.”

~*~*~*~*~*

As the afternoon turns to dusk, the beach day continues. The guys return to land and the girls take the boards out on the waves. You revive your chats from the beach out on the water, drifting into new topics outside of boys: like boxing and school and work and activism. By the time you’re walking back onto the shore, the boys have started up a fire. JJ offers you a sip of his beer as you ditch your board. You smile and accept, moving to sit between his legs. He wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you against him, and takes the bottle back to have another swig. Sarah settles with John B, and Kiara lounges back, her feet placed on Pope’s lap.

The music lulls out well-known hits (Come on Eileen, Build Me Up Buttercup, and the never-ending American Pie) and you bask in the warmth of the embers from the fire, drying off any speck of salt water. The bottle keeps getting handed back and forth between you and JJ, and eventually a joint joins the mix. The conversation turns easy, light-hearted jokes enhanced by the booze and weed, making everyone chuckle. Sighing, you lean your head back against JJ’s collarbones, looking up at him. He glances down at you, smiles, places a quick kiss on your lips. When his friends gently heckle the two of you, neither of you respond. As he pulls away, JJ rolls his eyes at their antics. Closing your eyes, quietly chuckling at something Pope says, you enjoy the wonderfulness of summer and your boyfriend, never wanting either thing to end.

[art]

Meet the Artist: @juliettelime

Hello! My name is Kiara Juliette Lime (she/her) and I am a Filipino-American illustrator based in Spokane, Washington. My work is driven by emotional characters and narratives and I am most interested in contemporary, slice-of-life, and romance genres. I started drawing around five years old and graduated from art school with a BFA in Illustration in May of 2022. My favorite mediums to work in are digital (Photoshop + Procreate), ink, marker, acrylic and gouache paint, and occasionally graphite, and my biggest artistic influences are shoujo manga, Taylor Swift's discography, and fashion illustration. Nice to meet you all!

Pleased to meet you, Kiara! Below are some of her artworks for you all to appreciate.

Check out more of Kiara's work over at her Tumblr, @juliettelime!

-

We are highlighting some of Tumblr’s talented artists of Asian descent all month as part of Asian American and Pacific Islander Heritage Month!

[lovelyjj]

maybe a mix of “i’m just afraid” and “tell me the truth”? 🫶

avoidance

jj maybank x reader

wc: 1.4k

a/n: I lowkey hate this.

You and JJ were the best of friends. You did everything together. He was your person you told everything to. He was your partner in crime. There were no secrets between the two of you.

You and JJ were on the couch that was on John B’s porch, enjoying the rain. The rain was blanketing the outer banks in water, soaking the grass and trees.

“I love the rain,” you stated.

“Really why?” JJ asked.

“I don’t know it makes me feel less alone, like the sky is crying with me.”

“That’s a really good reason,” JJ replied.

“Thanks,” you smiled.

“You want to dance?” JJ asked with a goofy grin on his face.

“In the rain?” You questioned surprised.

“In the rain,” JJ confirmed.

“Ok.”

JJ got up and reached his hand out for you to take, which you gladly accepted. The two of you went out on the grass and JJ held onto one hand. Then he put one hand on your waist and you put the hand not holding his, on his shoulder.

You guys danced and he spun you around and you got soaking wet. You were having a lot of fun though. You were having a blast and so was JJ.

When you were finished JJ ushered you inside as you giggled.

You both changed into dry clothes and afterwards JJ had an idea.

“Let’s make some hot chocolate,” JJ announced.

“Yes please,” you answered.

JJ whipped up two mugs of cocoa and you both sipped yours quietly.

“Tastes good,” you whispered.

“Wanna watch a movie?” you asked JJ.

“Sure,” JJ replied.

You both settled into John B’s living room and put on spider-man. You ended up falling asleep on the pullout couch.

——————

A couple days later you were all going out on the boat. The day was bright and sunny perfect for going out on the water.

JJ was looking at you in your bikini top. He knew he shouldn’t be looking at his best friend like that but he couldn’t help it. You looked hot and JJ could hardly look away from your chest.

You were oblivious to JJ’s ogling. You were happy to be on the boat with your friends.

“I can’t believe the weather is so nice,” you spoke.

“Yeah it’s perfect,” Pope responded.

“I thought it would be windy out here on the water,” JJ said removing his attention from your breasts.

“Hope we can catch some fish,” John B announced.

“Should be able to,” JJ commented.

While the boys were fishing, you Kiara and Sarah were on your phones. You were looking through your photos and you noticed how many you had of you and JJ.

There was one of you two at the beach with the waves in the background and a pretty sunset.

“Can I post this J?” you asked.

“Let me see it.”

You handed your phone to JJ and he took it. He scanned the image and smiled a genuine smile.

“Yeah that’s a good one. Go ahead fire away.”

You gave him a smile and decided to post the picture.

After a while you got a few comments. One was from Sarah that said, “Goals.”

You ignored it because you didn’t want to draw attention to it. The last thing you needed was people assuming your in a relationship with JJ cause your not. Your just friends and that’s all you ever will be.

—————

You were spending more and more time with JJ. Sometimes with the other pogues and sometimes just the two of you.

You were starting to catch feelings for him. You didn’t know how or why but being around him brought out the best in you. You started to fall in love with your best friend. You were scared you’ve never felt this way before. And what if he doesn’t love you back.

You decided to go to Kiara and ask for her help. She was working at the wreck, so you made your way over there.

“Hey Kie, I need your help,” you hesitated.

“Yeah sure y/n whatever you need,” Kiara replied.

“Here let’s sit down,” Kiara said as she directed you to a small table by the window.

You sat across from her and she gave you a kind smile with kind eyes.

“What’s up,” Kiara started.

“Well um I’ve sorta had these feelings for a certain someone and I’m not sure what to do about it. I just know I don’t want to tell them,” you began.

“Why don’t you want to tell them,” Kiara asked.

“I’m just afraid,” you bit your lip.

“What do you have to be afraid of?”

“Well first of all he could not feel the same way. He could reject me. He could laugh in my face. The list goes on,” you threw your hands up in the air.

“JJ wouldn’t do that,” Kiara raised a brow.

“How do you know it’s JJ?” You asked.

“Oh come on, who else would it be.”

“You’ve got a point.” you laughed.

“Speak of the devil,” Kiara whispered as you turned to the sound of the door opening.

JJ sauntered in to the wreck, Pope, John B and Sarah following suit.

“The gangs all here,” Kiara exclaimed.

“I need to go,” you whispered to Kiara.

“What why?”

“I just need to, ok!”

You slipped out the back door leaving the rest of the crew utterly confused.

—————

You have been avoiding JJ. It’s not that you wanted to, you hated the distance between you and not seeing him but you didn’t know how to act around him anymore.

You were getting worried because you thought JJ was on to you. Now JJ was getting worried because he hasn’t seen you in a while. He figured that you were mad at him. He hated it.

When the pogues would hang out all together you would not be there. You would miss the activities they had planned.

It was getting harder and harder hiding your feelings from JJ. You would always blush or your heart would beat really fast. So your only option you decided was to stop hanging out with him.

JJ was confused because of your absence. He was going to get to the bottom of this. He was determined.

He assumed you would be at your house. So that’s where he showed up. He knocked on your door a few times and after a few minutes you came to the door. You were shocked to see JJ standing there.

You wanted to run back to your room and hide. You were embarrassed by your actions. Just all of a sudden ghosting him. He didn’t deserve that.

“Hey um so I miss you. A lot. And I think we need to talk,” JJ scratched the back of his neck.

“Sure.”

You stepped outside and closed the door behind you.

“I need to know why your avoiding me,” JJ insisted.

“I’m not avoiding you.”

“y/n.”

“Ok ok I’ve been avoiding you because I didn’t want to see you.” You nervously crossed your arms and looked down.

JJ wasn’t buying it. “No. Tell me the truth.”

As you looked into JJ’s pleading blue eyes you felt your stomach flip. You couldn’t lie to him even if you tried.

“Fine. You want the truth? The truth is I’m in love with you. And I don’t know how to act around you anymore. I assumed you didn’t feel the same way so to save myself the rejection, I avoided you.”

“You thought I wouldn’t feel the same way?” JJ questioned.

“I’ve been in love with you for years,” JJ confessed.

“Really?”

JJ nodded his head.

“I can’t believe you did all that.” JJ said surprised.

You took a step closer to JJ and he took your face in his hands.

“Come here,” JJ whined.

You didn’t need to be asked twice. You leaned in and JJ placed lips on yours. Instantly you felt electrifying sparks shoot trough you. Your stomach erupted with butterflies. The kiss was gentle and delicate. JJ was excited and you were giddy.

Your lips were crushing together and moving against each other. JJ was feeling warm all over. Your hands were resting on JJ’s shoulders. One of JJ’s hand rested on your jaw and one hand snaked lower to your butt squeezing lightly. This caused you to gasp, allowing JJ’s tongue to slide into your mouth.

After making out you pulled away breathless. You wore a big smile and JJ laughed.

“You have no idea how much I’ve missed you.” JJ broke the silence.

“I’ve missed you too,” you responded.

“Will you be mine?” JJ asked.

“Yes, I’ll be yours,” you exclaimed.

JJ picked you up and spun you around, your laughter mixing together to create a sense of harmony and happiness. Since you and JJ were best of friends your romantic relationship will only flourish because you loved each other wholeheartedly.

[loveharlow]

SEVEN Blurb

TR Telling Sarah about What Happened with Rafe

swearing, mentions of non-con, angst, Sarah's kind of a bitch here, i guess this can be read as a standalone

YOU DON’T KNOW HOW ONE IS SUPPOSED TO FEEL AFTER BEING VIOLATED. Especially, when you had to go to school the very next day. 

The halls of the self-proclaimed ‘Kook Academy’ were bustling in the early hours of the morning — halls crowded with girls fixing their lipstick in the mirrors hung inside of their lockers, sports teams taking up an obnoxious amount of the available hallway space, and the principal speaking over the intercom, reading the morning announcements as no one truly listened.

The atmosphere of the prestigious island institution always made you feel out of place, but the warmth and familiarity that you were starting to feel as the weeks passed had seemed to somehow vanish overnight. 

Funny how one person could ruin everything. In just one night...

The air felt cold, causing you to hike your bag higher up on your shoulder and hug your arms closer to your body. Your eyes roamed the people around you — were they staring at you? Could they tell? You’d tried to cover the bruises as well as you could but it’s kind of hard with tears in your eyes that seem to come and go as they please.

It was like you couldn’t make it down the hall fast enough, seeing Kiara and Sarah laughing in front of your locker down the hall. They looked like the light at the end of the tunnel. You felt like when you reached them, maybe the morning wouldn’t feel so cold. So lonely.

“Hey!” Sarah piped up, finally spotting you as you came to a stop in front of your two best friends. “Where have you been? Class is about to start and I need your notes from last week, pretty pleaseeee.” She smiled at you.

“You kind of disappeared on us last night.” Kiara added, taking a sip of water from her water bottle before tucking it into the side pocket of her backpack — turtle keychain dangling aimlessly as she swung the sack around. “You’re lucky I checked your location when I’d realized you’d gone and saw you were at home. You had us worried. Did you Uber or something?”

You weren’t sure if they could see or hear the nervous gulp you choked down or the way your right hand kept opening and closing beside your leg as you gathered the words to reply, this being the first time you would’ve talked at all this morning. “I just started to feel sick, I guess…” You shrugged, eyes wandering wildly, trying to stop the images of last night from flashing in front of your open eyes. That was the worst part. Even when your eyes were open, the nightmares didn't stop. “Didn’t wanna ruin the party for you guys.”

“Oh, please.” Sarah waved off. “It was lame, anyway. I would’ve totally taken you home, you know that. Just let us know next time, okay?”

You simply grimaced — drawing your lips into a thin line and nodding once, eyes still wandering around like a madwoman. You didn’t know what you were looking for, if anything at all. It was just like your body was jittering from the inside, shaking to get out of your own skin.

“Hey…” Kie said, eyes softening as she stepped closer to you, your eyes darting to her. “You okay? You look...out of it-” She cut herself off when you jumped back, violently flinching as the tips of her fingers brushed against the skin of your arm, the small touch sending a wave of fear down your spine. She paused as you attempted to straighten yourself out, retracting her outstretched hand. “Okay, seriously, what’s wrong?” She asked, voice firm and eyes racing back and forth between you and Sarah, who looked equally as concerned.

You shoved your hands into your pockets, lips parted as you stuttered for a response. “...Honestly, it’s nothing. Like I said, last night just messed me up a little.”

“Feeling hungover is one thing.” Kiara started, crossing her arms. “Flinching like that is another. Did something happen? You know you can tell us-”

A sudden wave of relief filled you as the bell rang, signaling the start of first period.

“I’m fine, Kie. Seriously.” You said, forcing a smile on your lips as you took steps back and away from the two girls. “I’ll see you guys at lunch, okay?” You reassured, not giving either of them a chance to respond as you turned on your heel and walked away, practically sprinting down the hall and to your class, ignoring the ache that still lingered between your legs as you willed yourself to walk straight.

THE SCHOOL DAY SEEMED TO PASS JUST AS QUICK AS IT CAME. Every class was a blur — time seeming to move at the speed of light until you found yourself standing outside in the courtyard, once again between Kiara and Sarah as they chatted to one another. 

People passed by, one after the other — getting into their luxury cars or onto their assigned buses. You were just waiting until either Sarah or Kiara left to do the same yourself, figuring that leaving first would only add to their growing suspicion that something was wrong. And that ‘something wrong’ had something to do with the party and why you actually disappeared.

The sound of Kiara’s phone ringing pulled you from your thoughts, watching as the brown-haired girl sighed and looked up at you and Sarah. “It’s my mom. I’m late to work and Monday's have been busy lately.” She said, grimacing. “I’ve gotta go. I’ll text you later.” She waved off, taking two steps before the blonde girl next to you was calling for her.

“You’re still coming Rose’s dinner, right? This weekend?” She asked, eyes wide and pleading. It was no secret that Sarah wasn’t fond of her family, or rather being alone with them. She invited you and Kie whenever she could. And you felt terrible knowing you were about to exclude yourself from this event.

“Yeah, I’ll be there!” Kiara assured, walking swiftly towards her SUV — getting in and driving away.

Sarah was quick to turn to you, tossing her blonde hair over her shoulder. “You can still make it too, right?” She asked, a small pout forming on her lips. “I really want both of you there. Rose is a nightmare when it comes to these things…” She said, rolling her eyes. “Plus, Rafe is bringing Topper and Kelce and I really do not want to be at table with them for two hours without you two there-”

“I thought Rafe wasn’t coming.” You blurted without thinking, Sarah’s eyes pinching together in thought.

“...I mean, he wasn’t but then he changed his mind, I guess.” She said. “I don’t expect them to bother us. Topper’s kind of pissed at me anyway, Kelce is just there, and my dad should keep Rafe from being his usual asshole self-”

“I don’t think I can make it.” You said, looking at her with pity in your eyes. At least you hoped that's what it looked like. The thought of being near Rafe nearly sent you into a spiral on the spot. “I just remembered, I have work-”

“You don’t work on weekends.” Sarah said firmly, shifting her weight and crossing her arms.

You sighed. “My mom needs my help with something-”

“Your mom has a trial this weekend.” Sarah cut you off, blinking rapidly. “...Is this about Rafe?” 

“What?” You asked, heart pounding in your chest. “Why would it have anything to do with Rafe?”

Sarah just scoffed, prodding her tongue against her cheek. “Y’know, Topper said there was something going on between you two but I didn’t believe him.” She said, seemingly more to herself. “But he was right? You’ve been sneaking around with Rafe and what? You guys got into an argument or something and now you don’t want to be around him which means you can’t be around me?”

You didn’t know how to respond. “I- Yes, but no. That’s not-”

“You’re seriously going to keep this big of a secret from me and not even have the decency to be honest about it?” She spat, tone filling with anger. “This is exactly why I hate bringing my friends around him. He always scares them away or flirts with them or sleeps with them or steals them from me, but I thought you were different.” She hissed. “But clearly you’re just like every other girl around here. He calls you pretty and you spread your legs and then when he treats you like shit-”

“Sarah, please stop.” You tried, pinching your eyes shut and shaking your head. “I’m sorry for lying to you but this is bigger than that. It’s worse-”

“Worse how?” She asked incredulously. “Go ahead. I’ve heard every thing above the sun. What? He called you a bitch? Leaked your nudes? What is it?”

“I’m trying to tell you but I don’t think this is the best place to-”

“Please tell me what he did to you that was so bad-”

“He raped me.” You spat, cutting off the blonde girl. Your lips pressing together right after, eyes locking with hers. “Okay? I didn’t leave the party last night. Rafe showed up and drug me out and he…” You paused, looking down at your shoes as your eyes started to burn — suddenly too aware of every reminder of last night, everywhere his fingers dug into suddenly taking on a heat on your body. Taking a deep breath and swallowing your feelings, you looked up at the girl who was staring at you, dumbfounded. “Yes, we were sneaking around but we weren’t together or in love, it was just...sex. For that, I am sorry, Sarah. It happened out of nowhere and I never wanted it to go as far as it did. But last night…” You took a moment once more, palming the back of your neck — your sweaty palms gliding against the skin. 

“...You’re lying.” 

At this, you paused all movements. Looking up at Sarah with slitted eyes as your entire heart dropped to your stomach. “What?”

“Look, I know Rafe has his…issues but-”

“Sarah.”

“But he would never go that far. When Topper told me about you two, I thought it could be possible. Rafe didn’t seem to despise you as much as my other friends but even then I still didn’t believe it because I didn’t think you would do that to me.” She said, pointing a firm finger in your direction. “If this is you trying to cover up your guilt about sneaking around with my brother-”

“It’s not-”

“It’s not fair.” Sarah spat, her brows set into a firm line. “My brother isn’t perfect. But he’s not a rapist and I won’t let you pin that on my family. I won’t.” She shook her head, taking one step back from you. “Maybe if you had been honest about the whole thing, I could look past it. But this? This ridiculous story you’re trying to spin? It’s honestly really disrespectful and something I never expected from you.”

“Okay,” You said, putting your hands out in front of you. “Maybe I approached this wrong. But Sarah, I’m not lying. I’m telling you the truth.”

“No, you’re not!” She exclaimed, voice rising and gaining the attention of a few students nearby. “He wasn’t even there last night.”

“...He showed up. I told you he just showed up-”

“How come no one saw him there then?”

“It was really quick, Sarah. I barely remember it myself-”

“Why didn’t you call the police then? Why tell me?”

“...I was scared, I still am scared. I just thought I should be honest with you-”

“Honest is the last thing you will ever be.” Sarah scoffed, the small crowd of students forming only adding to your nervousness. “You fuck my brother behind my back for months and then try to say he assaulted you? Are you serious, right now?”

The crowd of students started whispering amongst themselves, only fueling your urge to run from the scene but you stayed firm on your feet.

“...I don’t know what else to say.”

“Great, because I’m tired of hearing you lie.” Sarah shrugged meanly. “Wanna hear something honest and truthful?” She egged on, eyes slitted as she took slow steps toward you, arms crossed. “You’re a backstabbing slut. And you went behind my back, sleeping with Rafe thinking you were something special when in reality, you just became another name on his long, long list. And when you realized that he wasn’t what you thought, you got your feelings hurt and wanted to come crying to me.” She said lowly, not a care in the world for the kids who were listening in shamelessly. “Well, guess what? I don’t believe a word you say because you’re just as fake as everyone else on this side of the island. And now everyone knows it. So, everything you said before about not fitting in here? Trust me, you fit in just fine.” Were the blonde’s final words as she backed away from you, arms still crossed over her chest.

You didn’t know what to say, so you said nothing at all. You never thought that in a million years Sarah Cameron could be so…cruel. But you guessed she was the Kook Queen for a reason. She claims Rafe wasn’t the person you thought he was, but maybe it was her.

Setting your eyebrows into a harsh, straight line and fixing a hard expression on your face, you stood up straight, ignoring the burning tears in your waterline. “Fuck you, Sarah.” You spat, hand curled into a tight, concealed fist at your side. The girl said nothing, staring you down with the most vicious look plastered on her features. You simply shook your head, biting the inside of your lip before stomping off in the direction of the student parking lot and leaving school grounds.

From that day on, your last few weeks at the Kook Academy would be pure hell. Every day becoming a battle between name calling, notes slipped into your locker, and any other cliche bullying tactic you could possibly think of. You were no longer under the protective beam of light that was Sarah Cameron. And you endured every second of the dark side of that school until you unenrolled at the end of the year, transferring back to Kildare County High School, where no one knew anything about what happened.

©loveharlow.

[mrsdarkandyandere7]

Dark!Rafe Cameron x Pogue!Reader

Pairing: Dark Rafe Cameron x (female) Pogue!Reader

▶ This is a yandere/dark work and it may contain triggering content so please READ THE WARNINGS before. Do not read if minor.

More at Masterlist

WARNINGS: Obsession; Stalking; Mentions of Noncon.  Manipulation.

Please, reblog and give me feedback.

--

Rafe doesn't like you per, but he can’t stop himself from obsessing over you. 

You’re not like the rest of those irritating Pogue’s like JJ and John B. You don’t share the same inclination for confrontation, always trying to bring peace and calm everyone down, especially Kiara.

That type of attitude fascinates him, with a tinge of jealousy, cause it shows you do care about them and often Rafe tries to imagine you doing the same for him, pleading him not to fight with those filthy Pogue’s, that you don’t want him to get hurt. 

Whenever your group of friends (which includes his annoying sister) are nearby, his eyes are immediately searching for you. Although he tries to be discreet, sometimes it becomes painfully obvious to Kelce and Topper that Rafe is staring at you. 

You’re not particularly pretty, not in the artificial way that Kook girls like to doll up, but there’s something about you. Something of a hint of natural beauty that draws him towards you and that pisses him off. You’re a medium, at best, yet Rafe - a fucking 10 - is obsessed over you. A Pogue. What a joke. 

But not even his inner conflict is able to make him forget about you as  some random girl sucks him off ýet all he can imagine is that it’s you, your hands holding onto his thighs for dear life as you struggle to take all of him inside your little mouth, expressing how good his cock feels. 

But when he’s alone in the comfort of his room, his fantasies are on the softer side, imagining a life with you by his side. Wedding in NY, honeymoon in the Bahamas. Not sure if he’d want to live in Obx, not with the Pogue infestation and your close relation with them. No way he’d let the mother of his children around those savages, if Rafe gets the final word then you’ll never see those friends of yours ever again. The more distant they are, the better. 

Rafe wants all of you, to keep you happy - with him, of course. To give you all the best in the world, to show you how good he can, if only you let him. He’d change for you, be the best boyfriend you could ever possibly ask for. You’be treated like a freaking princess, he’d make sure of that. 

But all of these delusional fantasies crack when you never seem to even acknowledge his presence, preferring to avoid him like he’s the plague. Rafe doesn’t let it show but a small part of him is actually hurt by this, while the rest of him is purely frustrated. 

It’s impossible for you not to like him, every single girl wants his attention yet you don’t seem to care. Most of the time, you completely avoid him, it’s even hard for him to get to cross eyes with you. Why do you play so hard to get?

The few times that you’ve been to the house with Sarah, Rafe did try to engage in a conversation with you, figuring it was his chance to woo you. No luck there. You’re like a vault, keeping everything to yourself, barely uttering a word to Rafe. 

Quickly, Rafe starts getting the impression that maybe you’re not as nice as he thinks you are. Maybe you’re just an arrogant silly girl, who thinks she’s better than him. Ohh, you must think so highly of yourself, no? That you’re above him, acting all high and mighty as if Rafe doesn’t deserve you.

This theory of his makes more and more sense as time passes, all the frustration and anger clouding his judgment. It’s got to be the only explanation on why you constantly ignore him. 

Rafe still wants to give you all the love in the world, but only after he fucks the atitude out of you. If you don’t drop the bitchy act, then Rafe will do it for you, don’t worry. 

Soon, he’s no longer lurking around but yes actively seeking you. He’s tired of being a nice guy, tired of playing games. 

“You should go on a date with me, have you ever been to Cesar's? Of course you haven’t, it’s a bit expensive for Pogue’s, isn’t it? Not for me though, I can show what a real date feels like.” 

If you keep denying him, boy, Rafe is gonna snap so hard one day. If you don’t want the nice Rafe, then maybe you deserve the evil Rafe for now. The one that will follow you around and won’t even try to hide it. He’ll park right outside your house, not bothering to disguise himself. 

“Stalking? That’s a pretty nasty word, you know. I would never stalk you, you must be imagining things. Why would I want to follow you? I got better things to do with my time.” 

Wherever you go, Rafe is right behind you. And each time, he gets bolder, his comments getting meaner and creepier. Maybe you wanted to deal with him on your own by ignoring his behavior but one day when he finally breaks in to your house, forcing himself on you over and over again. 

From now on, things shall be very different. You’ll do exactly as Rafe - your new boyfriend - says otherwise your family and your friends are gonna face the consequences. 

Rafe didn’t want it to be like this, to force your hand on this in such a manipulative way but seeing how you weren’t gonna budge, maybe this was the best way. He did get you in the end and that’s all that matters. 

[littlekiara96]

First request I got :D

Full version on my sideblog

Get your own request here

[unhingedkiara96]

Just go check my main @littlekiara96 for more info.

[baurbiediv]

hate to be lame {2}

PAIRING ➔ jj maybank x pogue!reader, jj x kiara (oops.)

WARNING(S) ➔ small mention of cheating, crying

SYNOPSIS ➔ tensions begin to face an all time high following the aftermath of you and jj’s argument, things become very rocky and you worry that he’s began to fall out of love with you and has found someone else who’s better for him.

BASED OFF THE SONG ‘hate to be lame’ by lizzy mcalpine (i recommended listening while reading!)

part one ➔ here

A/N ➔ thank you for all the love on capsize + the first part of this! and i am NOT A KIARA ANTI YALL PLEASE, that’s my girl fr

-

two weeks.

a whole two weeks had passed by since a word was spoken to jj and to make things worse, it was an argument. one thing the both of you agreed on was to never be mad at each other, clearly that didn’t work out.

trying to get jj to understand what he did was reckless didn’t quite go the way you expected it to. emotions got the best of you, and resulted in you emotionally lashing out on him.

ultimately, this caused jj to retaliate but before you could say anything else, it was already too late. by then he’d already told you to get out, there wasn’t anything else that could’ve possibly been said or done to change the outcome of this.

so now here you were, right back at the chateau. looking out the window, there he was, jj. the yellow and orange hue of the peaking sunset hitting his skin almost perfectly. how badly you wanted to get up and tell him that you love him and you were sorry and that the accident caused you to freak out and you could get pass this.

but it wasn’t that easy, whenever something like this happens, he starts to push away. not because he wants to, but because that’s what he’s used to, when he loves someone too much, he pushes people out. this wasn’t easy like people had always said, jj wasn’t the easiest person to read yet you already knew that.

you watched as kiara, pope, sarah, and jj all gathered onto the dock laughing while john b made his way back to the chateau. “y/n, you coming along? i’d hate to leave you by yourself.” he said, snapping you out your thoughts.

“oh, yeah let me grab my bag.” you told him, for the first time in a couple of weeks john b was probably the first person to see you even remotely crack a small smile. he gave you a thumbs up before leaving the house. without noticing, you’d been playing with the star pendant on your necklace.

it was the sole purpose that reminded you why the two of you were even together, you were his star that kept its light in the midst of his darkness. but that light was slowly losing it’s shine.

you took a deep breath before recollecting your thoughts and making your way down to the dock. noticing how kiara had stood very closely to jj, you swallowed the impending lump in your throat, that jello feeling taking over your body this time.

pope noticed as he looked at you, “you okay y/n?” he asked you worriedly, you gave him a nod, “i’m alright, thank you pope.” you whispered as he helped you board the boat. after what seemed like minutes, the boat finally took off and the group searched for a place to stop and relax.

everyone seemed to be having fun, except you. the thing is, it wasn’t on purpose, this is how you were feeling. you tried to cheer yourself up but it wasn’t working. your own boyfriend didn’t seem to care about the upset mood you were in, hell, two weeks. no texts, no calls, no nothing.

you watched the way kiara and jj interacted with each other. looks and touches lingering longer than they were supposed to, jokes being exchanged between the two.

you weren’t jealous, but kiara knew what had happened between the two of you, why were they all of a sudden closer (as if they weren’t already close.) together.

staying on the boat, you watched as everyone jumped into the water. you covered yourself in your jacket and the emotions has finally overcome you. the tears kept coming, you poorly attempted to keep your sobs quiet in hopes to not draw attention to yourself.

everything happened all at once and way too fast. during these two weeks, this was the reason why he wasn’t reaching out.

because he found someone better, someone who could be there for him. you were always there when he needed you, the one he turned to whenever he had problems with his father, or himself.

the girl he was supposed to confide in the most. all the love, all the time, all the joy, spent with you had gone to waste. and over a stupid argument that could have been prevented.

god how you wished to just disappear into thin air right now.

—

you found yourself sitting alone in the chateau again, and watching the group all gather around a small bonfire. kiara, closely wrapped around jj. never did the feeling of betrayal feel so raw right now. you looked away and felt your body sink lower into the couch.

the door swung open, to your dismay, jj. the blond boy saw your figure but didn’t meet eye contact with you. he made his way to the kitchen, this was your opportunity to talk to him. gathering your tired limbs you too, made your way into the kitchen.

it was fairly small, so there wasn’t anyway you’d be standing far from him. “j, can we please talk?” you asked him, his back turned to you. his body tensed at the sound of your frail voice. he turned around to finally face you.

you missed his face.

some cuts from past adventures were now healing. “yeah.. what do you want to talk about?” he said leaning against the counter.

“us. what are we?” you looked at him.

he sighed, not being prepared for this confrontation.

“you haven’t spoken to me in two weeks. i’m losing my mind here j. i know i shouldn’t have lashed out on you, i’m sorry.” you said, shifting your weight between both of your feet.

jj ran his hands through his hair as he let out a frustrated sigh, “i’m sorry y/n. i really am,” he breathed out, eyes landing on the chain he bought you, you still kept it on.

“i pushed you away because i fucked up. a couple days after the argument, i told kiara everything. my head was everywhere and .. and we made out.” he told you.

way to go.

your heart quite literally felt like it just got ripped out right of your chest and stomped on. you leaned against the counter and put your hands on both sides on your face before bringing them down to your mouth.

jj looked at you, his eyes full of worry and sorrow. he hates that he did this to himself, to you.

“did you do anything else?” you quickly got out not wanting to avoid any more hurt.

“no. absolutely not.” he breathed out.

you ultimately broke down and he pulled you into a hug. “y/n. i’m so sorry, it meant nothing.” he spoke softly as he kissed the top of your head. you cried as much as your heart would let you right into his chest.

“i’m so fucking sorry i didn’t anything sooner. i couldn’t bring myself to tell you. i knew we left on bad terms and i didn’t want to make it worse, i’m so sorry my love.” he said rubbing your back.

“jj.” you said, lifting your head from his chest. you calling his name alone was enough to grab his attention.

“don’t ever do this again. from now on we tell each other everything. you have to start trusting me, i can’t have you pushing me away. not then, not now, not ever.” your eyes glossy.

he nodded, you hugged him tightly as he rocked you side to side.

you were his star that kept its light in the midst of his darkness.

—

[di-devil]

The gold of my eyes, my dear ones

With pride. I want to present a gift to all participants!

Those who have already pleased the devil and those who are just thinking of participating💥

For contributing to this event, I give you a heartbeat. Demons have seven hearts, and there are a few more participants, so other parts of the body are present ahaha

I love you! My heart sank every time I saw your answers, so you have the right to take it!

CAREFUL, BLOOD:

@kittyflufi123 @justvoidsdumbstuff1 @1hazelnut1 @vanitythevantropist @theonepiecelazyartist @draw-br @ponemeu88 @kajilychnis @kiara-cosmotiger

I'm just starting to read your answers, so I'll be able to answer some of them much later!

(the list is growing)

[oncamelliastreet]

⋆｡‧˚ʚ ❀ hi!! i’m r, and i’d love to be friends ❀ ɞ˚‧｡⋆

here’s a little about me:

in general:

i am a minor, i’m fine with 18+ just don’t be…weird

my pronouns are she/her

i’m bi and somewhere on the ace spectrum (people are pretty but ew)

i’m an infp and a february aquarius

i’m obsessed with camellia flowers (and not because it’s a luke hemmings lyric, that was just a delightful coincidence)

please don’t bring any drama or any negative energy anywhere near my blog

tv & movies:

stranger things

fav character : max and mike

fav ship : byler

dead boy detectives

fav character : charles and jenny

fav ship : charles and edwin

gilmore girls

fav character : luke and jess

fav ship : rory and jess, luke and lorelei

ted lasso

fav character : colin and sam

fav ship : roy and keeley

heartbreak high

fav character : spider and any

fav ship : spider and missy

the bear

fav character : richie (cousin)

fav ship : i don’t really have one?

outer banks

fav character : jj

fav ship : jj and kiara

young royals

fav character: wille

fav ship: wille and simon

shadow and bone

fav character: nina

fav ship: nina and matthias

school spirits

fav character: wally

fav ship: maddie and wally

criminal minds

fav character : spencer

fav ship : jemily

sitcoms

new girl

parks & rec

the office

brooklyn 99

superstore

mcu

fav characters: bucky, wanda, loki

other fav movies

10 things i hate about you

the breakfast club

the bikeriders

grease

elvis

music:

5 seconds of summer (my favorite artist)

luke hemmings is my lane and also my favorite human ever :)

my fav album is youngblood, fav song is lie to me

luke hemmings

fav album is wfttwtaf (fav album of all time too), fav song is garden life

taylor swift

fav album is midnights, fav song is yoyok

reneé rapp

fav song is willow

chappell roan

fav song is naked in manhattan

one direction

fav album is four, fav song is what a feeling

harry styles

fav albums is harry’s house, fav song is lights up

louis tomlinson

fav album so fitf, fav song is angels fly

note: i am not a larry

niall horan

fav album is heartbreak weather, fav song is science

conan gray

fav album is superache, fav song is movies

olivia rodrigo

fav album is guts, fav song is teenage dream

sabrina carpenter

fav album is tied between short n sweet and eics, fav songs are vicious, juno, and exhale

ruel

fav album is 4th wall, fav song is lie

ashe

fav album is ashlyn, fav song is loose ends

maisie peters

fav album is the good witch, fav song is lost the breakup

madison beer

fav album is silence between songs, fav song is king of everything

florence + the machine

fav album is ceremonials, fav song is breaking down

paramore

fav album is after laughter, fav song is fake happy

i am also an enthusiast of 80s music :)

hobbies:

art:

i love to draw (graphite)

i dabble in watercolor

i do some digital art but nothing too complicated, mostly i just make wallpapers and turn albums into books

writing

nothing completed or posted anywhere because i procrastinate until i lose interest :)

reading

romance books mostly, my fav author is emily henry and my fav book series is once upon a broken heart

other fav books: six of crows duology, dance of thieves duology, abby jiminez’ most recent series (yours truly, part of your world, just for the summer), i’ll give you the sun, all our broken pieces, i’ve read most fluffy gay romances (red white and royal blue, boyfriend material, her royal highness,

⋆｡‧˚ʚ ❀ and that’s all!! i’d love to be friends, feel free to message me anytime! ❀ ɞ˚‧｡⋆