#keeg speaks

[freyjas-light]

Today is about changes, about deep breaths and allowing yourself to see the dark unknown that we keep hidden within ourselves. It's about exploring the things we so rarely bring to light but that still are a part of us. These things are not bad, they are not evil. They are misunderstood, ugly , raw, emotional, human. It's time to explore why you hide these thoughts and emotions.

Today where I live we get to experience a total solar eclipse and a new moon. I've been feeling the build up of this energy for a while. It's been ugly and raw. I've been depressed, moody, and not fully present for almost a month. It has sucked. But I keep reminding myself that these feelings are valid, and they are being purged. That by trying to push them down, I am only lengthening the problem instead of working on a solution. So I have taken this time to reflect, to work on things that bring me joy, to allow myself to feel what I feel and not put pressure on myself to be someone I am currently not.

And on this fateful eclipse day, I feel lighter and ready to move forward into this new era.

[covey-o-quail]

the dregs youtube channel run by anika and pim could also feature viral hits like "🔥SLAT KITCHEN NIGHTMARES🔥 ☠️☠️☠️" and "ranking the geezers" (dregs old guard or whatever). aggressively clickbait thumbnail for a keeg vs pim arm wrestle. the actual video itself is astoundingly low quality w way too much background noise. roeder gets rlly into conspiracies and films things like debunking the beurscanal bridge troll. however he doesn't want to speak on camera and it's all super low energy and unendearingly Bad and all his videos r unlisted

[gaming-universe]

Preference Catch-Up || König + Keegan

Authors Note: Here we are! Finally we have the König and Keegan catch-up. I really enjoyed writing these, and I hope you all enjoy. Gifs by @evilvvithin @yeyinde @samithemunchkin

How You Met

König

When Laswell had informed you that she had hired KorTac, you were skeptical at first.

The 141's experience with Shadow Company had left a bad taste in your mouth, you weren't sure what to make of private military companies. Though both Laswell and Price had vouched for KorTac, and for the men who were now going to be permanently stationed on base, you told them that you would form your own judgement.

That was when you met him.

You had been walking through the halls towards the mess when a few rookies began to call out to you, saying some rather inappropriate things that should not be said to a superior officer. You paused in your stride, slowly turning to face the three young men leaning against the wall. You folded your arms across your chest, eyeing them individually which seemd to give them a surge of confidence.

"Do you want to repeat that, rookie?" You snapped, your voice low and annoyed. You wish you could wipe off the smirk that appeared on the young man's face, his eyes sparkling with mischief as he stepped forward, throwing a cocky look over each shoulder towards his friends.

"I'm just saying, you look like a lot of fun. What do you say you swing by my bunk tonight? I'm sure we'll have a good time."

An immense feeling of disgust formed in the pit of your stomach, nausea causing you to feel sick. You took a deep breath, trying to calm down that gross feeling before trying to speak.

As you opened your mouth to reply, the three boys before you suddenly turned white. So white in fact, that they looked just as sick as you felt. Their eyes widened in terror as they stumbled backward, mumbling quick and scared apologies before all three of them sprinted down the opposite end of the hall.

You stared after them in confusion, that was until you felt a large and menacing presence behind you.

Slowly turning around, you were met with a tall wall of solid muscle. He was incredibly tall, your head just barely reached his chest. The sniper hood he wore marked by red stripes was indeed intimidating, and his eyes...piercing blue, accentuated by the black smudges of paint around them.

A heavy silence passed between you as you both stared at each other. You didn't know what to say, you'd never had anyone intimidate three men like that for you before. All you could muster was a small breathless laugh, and an awkward "Uh...thank you."

Though you couldn't see his face, the man before you smirked beneath his sniper hood, nodding toward you silently before slowly turning away from you. You watched in awe as he turned into the mess, disappearing from your view. You couldn't move, still in complete awe of what just happened. Someone moved into your peripherals, someone shorter and more familiar.

"Who was that?" You mumbled somewhat incoherently, causing the man beside you yo chuckle.

"That was König..." Soap spoke softly, a slight teasing tone to his voice "and he's the head of the KorTac team here now."

Your gaze snapped towards the Scotsman, your eyes widening in shock whilst Soap snorted in laughter.

"Oh yeah, private military companies aren't so bad now when you get scary guard dog privilages-"

"How about you fuck off back to Simon?" You growled rhetorically, your eyes narrowed on the sargeant with a hot glare. Soap laughed loudly as he turned on his heel, sprinting away from you before you could likely punch him in the face.

You sighed heavily and rolled your eyes, your gaze once again briefly flickering back towards the doorway of the mess.

Keegan P. Russ

You had met Keegan before briefly in passing, and even then he was very quiet.

Simon had introduced the two of you briefly before Keegan went away on a recon mission. He would be gone for months, behind enemy lines with little to no communication. Now Keegan was back, and Taskforce 141 was ecstatic.

He'd been making all the rounds saying hello to everyone, or so Soap had told you. You hadn't seen him yet, though you supposed that you didn't really know him that well, or he you.

You went about the rest of your day without a visit from him. You didn't know why you felt this way, but you were kind of upset that Keegan hadn't come to see you. You were part of the team, sure. The least he could do was let you know that he was alright.

Trudging through the halls on another sleepless night, you walked to the mess to make yourself a cup of tea. Tea was something that calmed you down most nights, but lately it felt like a habit than a remedy.

As you stepped into the mess, you expected it to be empty like it usually was. But this time you froze.

Keegan sat alone at one of the tables, staring blankly down at the cup of steaming tea before him. Though he still wore his mask, his eyes met yours with a stern stare. Your eyes held his gaze, despite the nerves now forming in your chest. You were the one to look away first, your eyes flickering between Keegan, the kitchen and the floor, unsure of where you should turn your attention.

"I uh...I just want to get some tea" You spoke softly, almost timidly. Wordlessly, Keegan nodded, watching your every move as you slowly made your way toward the kitchen. You could feel his eyes on you as you boiled the kettle, poured the water over the tea bag, and let it sit.

Every minute felt like an hour the longer you stared at your tea. After adding some milk and stirring your beverage, you took the cup in your hands and immediately made a beeline for the door. You didn't want to make things between you and Keegan awkward, so you thought that heading back to your room would have been the wiser choice.

So why did you stop in the doorway?

You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath as you turned on your heel to face him. Keegan was still watching you like a hawk when you spoke.

"I know we don't know each other that well, but I'm glad you're okay. The 141 missed you a lot you know."

You could have sworn that you saw his eyes softened slightly, but you played it off as nothing as you turned and left the mess.

As Keegan watched you leave, he couldn't help but sigh heavily. Sure, he wasn't the most socialable person on base, but he wasn't sure of he could trust you. Simon and Soap spoke highly of you, and so did Price. But he wanted to make his own opinion of you. He wanted to make sure thet he could trust you.

So, he would remain silent and observe. He would make sure that he could trust you, even if his silence pissed you off.

An Awkward Moment

König

There was no doubt amongst the 141 that you were a capable soldier.

But sometimes you felt like your height was a disadvantage. Yes, you were significantly shorter than the rest of your colleagues, but you never let that stop you. However, sometimes you wished that you were taller.

You knew he was doing it on purpose, and you swore that you would punch Soap the next time you saw him. He had placed the coffee jar on top of the cabinets which were already high enough. You struggled to reach the top shelf anyway, but at this point it was getting ridiculous.

You groaned, staring up at the coffee jar in disdain and hatred. You were getting real tired of this, there were only so many times you could do this before Price caught you, your dignity was on the line.

It was early morning, so it was unlikely that anyone would see you doing this. However, you still turned to scan the mess to make sure that there was no one around. When the coast was clear, you began to climb the counter. No matter how many times you did this, it was still percarious. When you stood up straight you felt yourself wobble, and a sharp gasp escaped your lips as gravity came into effect. You felt yourself falling backward, your life flashing before your eyes as you squeezed them shut.

This is it. This is the end.

You were going to die in the mess, all because you were too stubbourn to wait for someone to get the coffee jar down for you.

As you waited to make contact with the hard concrete floor, you shrieked when you instead collided with something soft and...warm.

With your heart racing in your chest, you slowly opened your eyes and found yourself in a pair of strong arms, holding you securely and tightly against their frame. You followed those arms up to a broad chest, and from there you looked up to meet those familiar piercing blue eyes underneath that sniper hood. It then dawned on you...that you were in König's arms. König had caught you.

He chuckled lowly, staring down at you with an amused glint in his eye. "Perhaps next time, you should just ask for help hm?" He scolded, a warm feeling forming in his chest as he watched your face turn a bright red. You pouted up at the Austrian, "Maybe if Soap stopped putting the coffee up there on purpose, I wouldn't have to".

You saw König's eye twitch slightly at the mention of your colleague, but he shook his head whilst gently placing you down back on your feet. You folded your arms over your chest, lowering your gaze to the floor as your embaressment was becoming too much. You watched as König's index finger hooked underneath your chin, lifting your head upward so that your eyes met his once again.

Staring down at you sternly, you noticed that his gaze hardened before he spoke lowly. "I would prefer it if you didn't endanger yourself, mein liebling. Don't do that again."

You felt your heart skip a beat in your chest, your blood running hot as König waited expectantly for your answer. You nodded quickly and silently, worried that if you even tried to speak, your voice would betray you completely.

Seemingly satisfied with your answer, König released his hold on your chin and the both of you agreed to never speak of this again. After that morning however, the coffee jar always remained on the bottom counter where you could reach it. And every time König entered a room, Soap would always cower behind Simon, avoiding the Austrian's intimidating gaze.

It always made you smile.

Keegan P. Russ

The mission had been a set up, no one saw it coming.

The intel had been wrong from the start, so no one really knew what to expect. Out of everyone else, you and Keegan had made it out in the worst state. There was no life-threatening injuries thankfully, however the bruises, cuts, scratches and dirt covering your bodies meant that you had been through hell to survive this botched mission.

The look on Simon and Soap's face looked like they had seen literal ghosts, neither of them expected either of you to make it out of that base alive.

You longed for a shower, so much so that the second the plane touched down on the runway back at base you made a beeline for your quarters. Quickly swiping a change of clothes from your room, consisting of a pair of exercise shorts and one of Simon's old shirts, you relished the thought of hot water against your skin.

Stepping into the adjoined bathroom in your quarters, you stripped off your gear and grimey clothes, turning on the shower and stepping inside.

A soft moan escaped you as the hot water relaxed your muscles, your shoulders slumping almost instinctively. But the pleasure was short-lived when an immense stinging pain took over your senses. The cuts and scratches screamed in protest at the hot water, but you ignored it. Washing the dirt and dried blood from your body, the pain eventually became nothing but a dull ache.

With your shower drowning out all other thoughts and the stress from the mission, you didn't hear the knock at your door.

Keegan couldn't stop thinking about you. When you both got trapped inside that base, stuck between never-ending gunfire and explosions, his only thought was to get you out alive. He'd thought he'd lost you a few times, after the two of you had become seperated on numerous occasions. Seeing you emerge through a haze of dust or return to his side after a rather dangerous encounter, a light feeling formed in his chest. Having been around you for the last month or so, Keegan had grown quite fond of you.

Seeing you covered in dirt, grime and dried blood did something to him. He didn't know what exactly, but something deep inside him spurred him towards you door. You had left the plane in quite a hurry, which wasn't unusual according to Price. But Keegan needed to know that you were okay.

And that's how he found himself here. He knocked on the door, but there was no answer. Probably against his better judgement, Keegan let himself in. Your room was much tidier than his, it appeared more homely and welcoming. He noticed the clothes on the bed, and the sound of running water coming from the next room. The bathroom door was slightly ajar, enough for some light to stream into the room. Then he realised, his eyes widening as his stomach backflipped.

Shit, you were in the shower. He definitely shouldn't be here right now.

As Keegan turned to leave, he suddenly felt a wave of nervousness wash over him as the water in the shower stopped running. Fuck. You would be out here any minute now, he had to get out. But of course, the universe had other plans.

The second Keegan spun around to leave, his foot caught on nothing. He cursed has he fell, smacking onto the concrete floor with a loud "Shit!"

He prayed to god that you didn't hear a thing, but the light that flooded the room told him otherwise. "What the fuck do you think you're doing!?"

You felt your face flush a bright red out of shock and anger as you watched Keegan roll over onto his side, his eyes meeting yours and going wide as saucers.

You knew that what he saw left little to the imagination. You were wearing nothing but a towel wrapped around your body, still soaking wet after leaping from the shower upon hearing a crash from your bedroom.

"I uh..." Keegan fumbled, searching for the right words to say.

Fuck. You were...fuck.

Your glare sent ice through his veins, your eyes narrowing dangerously on his form. "If you get out now, I will pretend this never happened. You have five seconds before I scream, and Simon is only just down the hall-"

Keegan jumped to his feet and raced out of your room before you could even finish your sentence. You watched as he scrambled for your door and disappeared down the hall, a nervous sigh leaving your lips.

You knew Keegan probably had the best intentions, but that didn't stop the embaressment of being caught in your towel from consuming you.

When he saw you the next morning, he apologised profusely, much to the confusion of Simon, Soap and Price. You accepted his apology, and told him that should he mention it again, you woud make sure he suffered a violent end.

[pear1escence]

Bedrotters

Keegan P. Russ x fem!Reader

Content Warnings: brief mention of weapons and killing.

A/N: Eh. Eughhhh.

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇

He was dead asleep as soon as his arms were wrapped around you. His head resting in the crook of your neck, taking in the scent of that sugary perfume he loved, deafening the soft snores that fell from his lips.

There’s a bitterness to his return, edging at the feeling of relief that had soothed your soul when his car had pulled into the driveway. A numb feeling of sadness, a trace of the worry that gnawed at you for every day that had passed since he was supposed to be back.

He’s okay. He’s safe, here, with you. It’s comforting, having his body pressed up to yours, a physical confirmation of the words you keep repeating in your head.

⋇⋆✦⋆⋇

Keegan’s still asleep by the time you’ve left the house, a quick run to the grocery store to grab your missing ingredients for tonight’s dinner. The man must’ve tired himself out to the bone, cause when you return and the house is still silent, no sound of his records playing some old song, no sound of metal scraping against metal while he worked on some repair in the kitchen, you find him sleeping in your bedroom.

His gear still in a pile on the floor, stained with dirt and blood. The digital clock on his nightstand tells you that you have more than enough time to get dinner ready. Enough time to have him in your arms for a little while longer.

The sound of one of your favourite CDs, a collection of slow, melancholic love ballads plays from your speakers on the dresser. The words sound from your lips, a lullaby sung softly for your lover.

You remain like that for a while, humming to the tune of whatever songs are playing. Your mind wanders on its own as you admire Keegan, looking so pretty even with his face still stained from his eyeblack. He’s lying comfortably in your heavy duvet with a soft expression on his face, a stark contrast to the hard image he splayed out for the rest of the world to see.

Your thoughts wander off on their own unmarked path, taking your watchfulness with them. Keegan stirs awake without you taking notice, pale blue eyes watching you as fingertips trace absentminded circles into his skin.

His voice brings you back to the main road, your eyes falling to him as he speaks. “Wish I could read your mind, know where your head goes when you zone out like that.” He sounds tired, voice scratchy from his slumber. His hand lifts to ruffle your hair, and just because you’ve missed him so much you let him, even though you’d otherwise flick his hand away in annoyance of him messing up your locks.

“Was just thinking about you.” You murmur, a genuine smile on your face as his hand moves to cup your cheek. He’s so gentle with you in these moments, when you’ve been yearning for each other for weeks and finally come back together. The roughness of which he handles his guns, the harsh grip he welds his knife with as it sinks into the flesh of an enemy soldier, is reformed so that he can touch you how he wishes. Smoothed down so that he can trace your skin and heal your scars instead of leaving you hurting from open wounds.

It’s difficult, leaving the rough environment of his work to come home to you, where he can be soft and gentle all he wants for a limited amount of time. It’s almost never sufficient, you want more, and you’re greedy for wanting more, but you know it batters him more than it does you.

Keegan’s body shifts upwards, his back slotting against the headboard as his arms hoist you up to hold your body to his. “Hey, stay with me.” He reinforces his words with a pinch to your side, causing you to yelp.

You glare at him, dramatically rolling your eyes at him before leaning into his chest and sticking your tongue out at him. “I am here. Haven’t gone anywhere, Keegs.” He scoffs, arms trapping you as they wrap around your body to pull you even closer, muscles tightening as if you would try to escape. “Y’know what I mean. Don’t like it when you slip away so easily.”

You could be falling asleep yourself nestled up to Keegan like this. A big hand slips underneath your shirt to squish the softness of your stomach, his head tipping forward to nibble at your shoulder. “S’long as you’re not getting stuck on stupid stuff, don’t put yourself in a bad mood, baby.” You hum in agreement. “Mm. Need to get dinner ready.”

He laughs silently, “Playing housewife?” He mutters against your skin, placing a loving kiss on your shoulder. You snort. “You need a shower. You stink.” You respond, feigning annoyance. You shriek as he turns your body to push your face close to him, “No, no! I’m not joking, I’m gonna need to change the bedsheets now, sweaty old man.” You giggle, glancing up at him and catching the sass of his eyeroll. “Mhm. Shut it.”

[freyjas-light]

I also see this a lot with hypersexualizing deities as well. I know this goes for all pantheons, but I have specifically seen it with Freyja (and sometimes Freyr) when trying to find online sources. The minute I see a site really playing into her depiction as the goddess of sex and pleasure and how she slept with everyone, I get sad. While yes, those are some of her associations, it's not nearly her only qualities. It says a lot about the author when they only want to focus on the lustful side of the gods as well, instead of seeing them as robust personalities

Don’t get me wrong, I absolutely adore deity depictions made by artists online. However, it sometimes gets unsettling when deities whose aspects are centered around entirely nonviolent concepts are drawn as hyperviolent, warrior-type of characters. This is especially common in depictions of Norse deities. I can understand why this tendency would be, considering some of these depictions are made for promoting video games, and such. It’s plenty more surprising, however, when such drawings can be traced back to pagan sources. Now, this highlights a larger, more concerning issue: the general perception of Norse deities by pagan informational websites. It gets easy to distinguish between the pagan sources I want to look into and those I want to avoid, based on the general image of some deities that they choose to present. I know I’ve talked about this in the past, but if you spread information on Norse deities but depict them all as “warrior Gods”—by only relying on hyperviolent representations even in the case of more “peace-oriented” deities for example, it shows you don’t care to go deeper than your surface-level understanding of a mythological pantheon that’s filled with diverse figures and nuance. And it’s especially concerning when this type of perception is spread by websites that advertise themselves as being 100% factual and unbiased. These types of sources generally reduce deities to a fixed list of aspects (“This or that deity is the god of this, period”) and it doesn’t help new pagans at all to explore the pantheon and their own perception of it. (This tendency is especially common on New Age websites, as they also tend to put up lists of unmovable correspondences while reducing the importance of UPG and personal belief in deity associations.) It doesn’t spark skepticism, reflection or curiosity. Let me illustrate: if someone who’s questioning their spiritual path and considering becoming pagan sees a super intimidating and ferocious depiction of Óðinn, accompanied by the caption “He is the god of death and war:))” (implied: he is the god of mostly that), they will likely not consider right away other important aspects of Óðinn as a deity, such as his association with wisdom, poetry, the afterlife and other, vastly more nuanced elements of his myth. Websites who present hyperviolent depictions of pretty much all Norse deities, even in the case of Frø or Njörðr, more often than not have some sort of ties with the far right or even sometimes with white supremacy. At the top of my head, I could even name at least two folkish pagan websites I stumbled upon simply because I was baffled by the images they put up online and sought to see who’d commission such pictures. These sorts of website also tend to reduce deities to a handful of personality traits and this can lead new pagans to view them as entirely two-dimensional. It’s a dead giveaway for sources to avoid, in my opinion. If you are a new pagan who seeks to better understand a deity’s areas of influence and general personality, I would advise you to double-check sources, to keep researching and researching until you’ve consciously made your own opinion of them. Don’t right away believe the very first source you stumble upon. This is all a personal thought I’m trying to express as clearly as possible, and if any of you guys have anything to add, don’t hesitate to share your own thoughts and experiences! I would be delighted to hear about them.

[lxlith-aftxn-cos]

Callout post on Keegs (keegans_mask) on Tiktok!

If you guys haven't heard the news, we sadly lost a Call of Duty cosplayer recently, known as Inquisitor, another Ghost cosplayer on Tiktok. Inquisitor was known for being the lightsaber Ghost. Recently, he took his life due to a rumor that wasn't even true. It fucking sickens me how bad this situation got, knowing that the people involved are grown adults. Not too long ago, Inquisitor was rumored to be a gr00mer and a ped0ph!le because of AJ lying about their age online, making him seem like the bad person. Tito was involved in this situation, along with Keegs and AJ.

This Keegan cosplayer, Keegs, was mocking him before, during, and after his stream. It makes me sick. He stated that the rumors were false and that he was speaking the truth about it. I can't believe that adults did this, grown adults. It's fucking embarrassing. NEVER fucking lie about your age on the internet just to make someone look bad, and Keegs should've never gotten involved in this, because it wasn't even about her, at all. So fucking embarrassing.

This makes me so fucking angry. I used to love Keegs, but now she's a fucking piece of shit. What she did was illegal. I hope she fucking takes time to realize that she is a fucking criminal, like seriously, this can get the authorities involved. This shit is never okay, never fucking okay. Roukin getting harassed on his stream is horrible, but not as bad as this shit. It makes me so sad. I'm a cyberbullying victim and hearing this is just so fucking depressing. I can't even fucking say how angry I am right now.

I hope Keegs, AJ, and Tito realize how horrible they are. I hope they realize that it's too fucking late to apologize. I hope they accept the fact that they are shit people for causing Inquisitor's death. What they did, is so fucking wrong. Mocking him at his lowest point is the worst fucking thing she did, no apology, held no accountability towards her actions, nothing. I don't fucking care at this point. Nothing will make me feel better anymore. Nothing will make me forgive her. I have never felt so angry at these people. Grown adults doing this? How embarrassing. Be ashamed of what you did.

Inquisitor was never a gr00mer. You knew damn well he wasn't Keegs, AJ, and Tito. It's too late to fix what you fucking did, you can't run from what you did, Keegs. You knew damn well what you did was wrong. You knew.

Rest you poor soul, Inquisitor...

May you be missed, stay frosty...

[lunarthecorvus]

You said you’ve read multiple fics where Wylan and Kaz’s moms were friends, can I get the links?

Kaz Brekker's Mother's & Marya Hendriks fanfiction recommendations

part of Lunar's soc fanficiton rec series

-------------------------------✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧----------------------------------

blood of my blood by @garbagef4iry

Wordcount: 9,332 Chapters: 9/9

Characters: Kaz Brekker's Father, Kaz Brekker's Mother, Original Characters, Marya Hendriks, Jan Van Eck, Kaz Brekker

Tags: Women’s Rights Movement, city girl x country boy, Misogyny, Badass Women, mentions of abuse and violence, late victorian england vibes, Prequel

Author's summary/notes: As Kaz struggles in his confidence with becoming a father, he yearns for his own. For both of his parents. This is the story of his mother and father— Wilhelmina Trapp and Abram Rietveld. My summary/notes: I love this fic so much. You have badass women fighting for the women's right movement, I'm obbsessed with Kaz's mum in this, and it has Anika's parents?! Also Marya my beloved <3 and how she ended up where she did + so many other original characters

---------- ☾₊ ⊹

Keeping Me Alive by @martinakl13

Wordcount: 510,662 Chapters: 175/?

Characters: Kaz Brekker, Inej Ghafa, Nina Zenik, Matthias Helvar, Jesper Fahey, Wylan Van Eck, Jan Van Eck, Marya Hendriks, Anika Imogen, Alys Van Eck, Inej Ghafa's Mother, Original Characters, Jakob Hertzoon, Inej Ghafa's Father, Jordie Rietveld, Specht, Per Haskell, Jarl Brum, Pim, Keeg, Roeder, Tante Heleen, Pekka Rollins, Colm Fahey, Asha, Hanzi, Big Bolliger, Oomen, Hanne Brum, Saskia Rollins, Kaz Brekker's Father (Mentioned), Kaz Brekker's Mother (mentioned), Matthias Helvar's Sister, Matthias Helvar's Father, Matthias Helvar's Mother, Genya Safin, Reyem Yul-Kaat, Nikolai Lantsov, Zoya Nazyalensky

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Sports, Alternate Universe - Ballet, Gambling, Dyslexia, Trauma, Violence, Past Child Abuse, Mixed Martial Arts, Past Character Death, Touch-Averse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Swearing, Implied/Referenced Sex, Alcohol, Hacking, Past Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Slow Burn, Jordie Rietveld Lives, Soft Inej Ghafa, Soft Kaz Brekker, Drug Use, Depression, Kaz Brekker Needs a Hug, Mutual Pining, Inej Ghafa Needs a Hug, Eating Disorders, Drug Addiction, Survivor Guilt

Author's summary/notes: A boy who lost everything and is still fighting for his chance at a better life. A ballerina who wants to make her dream come true. A soldier running away from a terrible truth. A multilingual girl, abandoned by her own family, trying to find her place in a world. A talented musician who struggles to overcome his father's prejudice and mistrust. A boy who solves his problems by making bad decisions. Six students of University of Ketterdam deal with their past and traumas to find love, understanding and friendship. My summary/notes: I have recommended this fic before so I won't add any new notes but although it is only in the background they do speak about Marya and Kaz's mothers shared past friendship. Also, Martina is so sweet and such a great author with so many other soc fics so go check them out

you'll get the green light (and i'll get the old door in the face) by @honeii-puff

Wordcount: 698 Chapters: 1/1

Characters: Kaz Brekker, Marya Hendriks, Wylan Van Eck (Mentioned), Alys Van Eck (mentioned), Plumje Van Eck (mentioned), Jesper Fahey (Mentioned), Kaz's Father (mentioned), Kaz's Mother (mentioned),

Tags: no beta, Title from Problems (Mother Mother)

Author's summary/notes: In which Mayra Hendriks invites Kaz Brekker for tea twice, and one time he accepts My summary/notes: I know this fic is short and only talks a bit about it, I still think its sweet and is great ground to think about the friendship more.

These are the only fics I can find now, I will keep on the look for the others, and if anyone has a fic with this friendship feel free to let me know and I'll read it and rec it <3

[madstronaut]

tis christmas in july aka the season for feasting year-round 

much like the 3-in-1 monstrosity of shampoo/condish/bodywash that the COD men probably use (not gaz, though he would n e v e r) I am tossing in my ramblimmentaries three of cin’s lovely fics together here 🥰

aaanyway not even ashamed to say I’ve been re-reading their holiday keegan fic SEVERAL TIMES a month since I first saw it last december cos it’s so cute and fluffy

ok I need to get this out of the way laughing my ass off rn because autocorrect changed cumikering to cucumber several times throughout here and i was howling when I went to edit this and I was like why are there cucumbers everywhere??? LMAO

Reading: Neighbour Keegan Russ x reader by @cumikering

ah meet cute at the laundry room; I love it alr (as you can see i am easily pleased/amused/moved)

also it’s already on sight with reader’s cuz, i have unfortunately met ppl like this IRL (haven’t we all) and well talk about telling on themselves about how unhappy they are :/

“Well, if you need company…” he said, trying to not sound too hopeful. I’d love to spend some time with you. You turned to him, brow raised. “Wait, you mean, you want to come with? Be my plus one?” “That wasn’t- well, yeah. I can do that.” He shrugged. “If you want.” This wasn’t the direction he was heading for. He was going to offer to spend Christmas together, maybe exchange gifts, but he surely wasn’t going to take that back. Anything for a chance with you.

AAAA OBSESSED WITH HOW CUTE AND AWKWARD THIS WHOLE EXCHANGE IS

He always enjoyed seeing your face brighten like that, despite never getting the chance to see it enough…But between deployments, he was lucky to even catch a glimpse of you once a week, leaving any possible advances towards you simply a fantasy to him. He was out of practice, but was he that out of practice that he came on too strong and scared you? He certainly didn’t mean to make it suggestive. This was going to end before it even started. He grimaced to himself.

we love some good ole mutual pining🥺🥰🥺🥰🥺🥰

That time you saw Keegan on a run shirtless out your window you had to sit down.

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHA crying laughing at this…also reminded me of a time I hung out with a friend in LA who went to pick up a friend after he ran a marathon and drop him off before we went to dinner - didn’t realize the runner was an old acquaintance I hadn’t seen in a while since he was a senior when I was a freshman in college but I fucking remembered him alright when he came running up ripped af, shirtless, sweaty, saw me and went “MADSTRONAAUUTTTT OMG” and picked me up and spun me while in his giant hulking sweaty arms and I briefly bluescreened…anyway cough sorry back to keegan what was I saying, yes shirtless sweaty keegan yes yes 

He didn’t speak much (you wished he did though because his voice was divine)

my fellow voicekink brian bloom fans where you at

ah wooing by fake dating, is there a better trope (tbh the ones I’ve read are hit or miss but this one is 10/10)

Keegan sat on his bed as you went through his wardrobe. How cheesy would it be if he were to pull out his guitar and serenade you? He, too, was told the ladies liked men who played the guitar. Why do you think he picked it up in high school?

*thousand eyed stare thinking of how many times I've heard wonderwall as a millenial*

He’d made it his mission to make sure taking him to your family was worth your while.

ah yes a true soldier through and throughhhhh~

You were a steady stream of glee that didn’t drain him and he couldn’t get enough.

AAWWWWWWW fucking loved this line!!!!!!!

also the cousin’s name as Bella now has me picturing her as twilight kristen stewart

It only made it hard to dilute your hopefulness that this meant the slightest bit more than nothing.

“dilute your hopefulness” GAAHHH LOVE THIS PHRASE CIN MWAH MWAH

now how to put this lightly but everything about bella just filled me with pure rage lol first off I WOULD ALSO KILL FOR A DYSON AIR WRAP GIFTED TO ME (can I buy one? yes. can I justify buying one? hell no) and I hate to use this term but textbook definition of a ‘pick-me girl’ right here but seeing casual cruelty like this would make me hear those kill bill sirens and have me swabbing some vaseline on my face and taking my earrings off and spitting some razorblades out my mouth and- cough anyway that’s from my younger fanciful days, I don’t carry razorblades in my mouth this isn’t late 90s/early 2000s new york ha cough anyway moving on smh throwing my hands at bella up in air

but I loved the contrast with keegan and let me just say everything about bella’s ‘gift’ goes against the pure nature of giftgiving and I am thrilled that she left the card there but got to take Keegan home 🥰

this whole fic reminded me of a lovely quote I read on a tear-off daily calendar lol

“The wise one knows. The giver of the gift IS the gift. And the gift is just the giver’s heart in the shape of something to make you smile.  The gift decays. The giver stays. And so the real gift remains.”

I will make an exception for celebrating Christmas in July for any of cin's holiday fics 🥰🥰🥰

-----------------------------------------

aaaaand also reading: by Ghost x plus-sized reader by cinny

omfg fucking tearing up my pillows to shreds at how much I love this lil fic!!!

You scoffed, looking past him at the other ladies in the room. “Are you serious? There are plenty who weigh far less.” His brow rose. “Are you calling me weak?”

fucking love reading about a suave smooth-ass ghost

His eyes softened a touch. “May I? Please?”

🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺 WHO CAN RESIST PUPPY EYED GHOST??? TELL ME WHO

 Across the pub, the table of three men grinned at the massive stranger. The one with the mohawk was very much entertained as he gave him thumbs up.

yes yes we love wingman!141

You laughed, your breath warm against his ear. “Are you going to set me down or am I having my drink on your back?” “Don’t give me ideas.” He chuckled as he lowered you to your feet.

HOW CUTE IS SIMON CARRYING READER TO THE BAR? AAAAAAA

“Okay. Well, thanks for he drink. You could get back to your mates if you want.” “I’m Simon,” he mustered instead.

“he mustered” AAAH I LOVE BIG NERVOUS MEN STUMBLING OVER THEIR WORDS

When he turned to them, they immediately busied themselves with their drinks, averting their gazes.

LMAO

So that was why you were alone. You were waiting for someone. Disappointment anchored at the bottom of his chest. “Right. Okay.” You smiled. “Thanks for the drink, Simon. I’ll see you around, yeah?” He grunted and you headed to the end of the bar. He stood umoving for another second before retreating to his table like a kicked puppy.

ummm omg I literally keeled over and slumped out of my chair in sympathy for simon for a good minute before I could read on OMG CIN HOW COULD YOU (lmao jk I loved this sm)

You flagged down some other blond man who walked over to you with a smile.

LMAO yes yes simon you are clearly superior

“I know she’s with someone, but I can tell she likes you more,” Price said, and Simon finally tore his gaze away from you. “Ye should fight ‘im, L.T. He dinnae stand a fuckin’ chance.” “You can knock him out with a slap,” Gaz quipped.

fucking love this, cin has 141 characterisation down to a T with each of their responses!!!! 

also men of the world if you can please take notes on stepping up from 141 here, please start doing so yesterday tyvm

so busy mopping up my heart from melting at how adorable this meet-cute is and I also got halal two days in a row from the halal guys cart by work thanks to reading about the kebabs in this fic

-----------------------------------------

and finally reading: Ghost x asmr artist reader by cinny

"Simon had a pepper problem and a pasta dilemma"

🥺🥺🥺🥺 I am dying at the cuteness here alr🥺🥺🥺🥺

You turned to him. He noticed the little startle before you shoved your phone back in your pocket.

men who are self-aware of their size and presence and the effect it has on ppl around them and act accordingly, I love you

Your quiet cooking videos were one of the only things left that offered him calmness, especially on those nights away on missions, giving him tingles in all the right places, and shamefully, the wrong ones too sometimes.

sir, sir, there is no room for shame in love~

“Ah- I’m sorry,“ he managed, flustered by your sudden exit. “I didn’t want to be presumptuous, but you make those videos, don’t you? I recognised your voice.” You grinned, turning to him. “I just wanted to thank you,” he said. “Your videos comfort me a lot.” “I’m happy to hear. Thank you for watching.” Simon wanted to tug his beanie over his face because as you walked away, he was unmoving with a racing heart and a blush over his pale cheeks.

omfg WANTED TO TUG HIS BEANIE DOWN??? I AM IN LOVE I LOVE STRONG YET VULNERABLE GIANT MEN SM (this is a fluff fic so I am keeping with the fluffy vibes nd restraining my horny ass from choking out some absolutely thirsty comments here)

Despite the uncomfortable circumstances, your quiet yet crisp voice always sent him into a restful slumber.

yes shoutout to my favorite YT vids and comfort fics for putting me to sleep without fail

The chance encounter only fuelled his attraction. Knowing the kind smile behind the sweetest voice felt like an intimate secret, one you shared with him and only him - not with the rest of your few thousand subscribers.

i love how sweet simon is here with his lil parasocial crush and OMG WHEN READER APPROACHES HIM FIRST IN THE PASTA AISLE I also blushed IRL GOD I LOve FLUFF FICS SM

“Someone sent in a recipe for a video, and it’s absolutely delicious. I’ve been making it at least once a month ever since.”

SIMON’S COMFORT YOUTUBER’S COMFORT RECIPE IS SIMON'S??? WHAT IS THIS GLORIOUS OUROBOROS OF A COINKYDINK

He combed his hair back with his fingers, hoping his hat hair wasn’t terrible. He caught the double take you did at his tattooed arm.

🥰hehehe i love these little tidbits and morsels of vulnerability (hmm good band name, writing that down)

The rich scent of caramelised meat drifting in the room wrapped around him like a warm blanket.

Between sips of tea, you enjoyed your own halves of the chocolate wordlessly, the music melting into the background.

The savoury aroma glided past the thin gaps of the oven, swirling and dancing between you and him.

mmmmmm this has to be one of the coziest fics ive ever read

“I was an apprentice butcher before I enlisted.” He pressed down on the ricer with ease.

so much said in two sentences!!! ugh mwah mwah so many chef’s kisses for your writing style cinny

also loved how both are very self-aware and how reader picks up on simon talking about his mom in past tense and the whole fic emerging to fit around this bit of simon’s story is so wonderful to me… He waited until you took a bite before taking his own, and his breath caught. His brows furrowed as lump formed in his throat. Had the ground cracked and plunged him into a glitched universe? He was once more in Manchester, 10 years younger, finally home after a long day at the butcher, his mum and brother waiting at the table with the piping hot dish in the middle of it.

literally picturing that critic eating ratatouille flashback end scene from the eponymous movie 😂🥰

The last thing he wanted to do in front of you was shed a tear, but there he was, some hulking stranger sobbing on your shoulder as nostalgia held him in a death grip. It was humiliating to be seen like this – he didn’t remember the last time he cried from feelings, yet the tears wouldn’t cease despite his efforts. But you held him close, and his thick arms wrapped around you. He told himself if he pulled you close enough, it would hurt less.

i love how simon’s comfort streamer becomes an IRL comfort place for him to safely break down 🥹🥹 did I cry from reading this? IDK MAYBE WHO KNOWS? (looks at the ruined kleenex piled in my wastebin)

I hope all readers know and have a person and place like this (and may we host such places and become such people as well) 💛✨🌿

and of course I will pause my rambles here with a big-ass hug 🫂 and thank you to cinny for being a wonderful comfort fic writer for meeee 🫶🫶🫶😘👌😘👌😘👌

[nothingkillsyoulikeyourmind105]

“I’m Scared”

TW-None

Master List

Keegan Russ

-a/n- this one is visibly in view and does let me know @ave661 tumblr account. This was pure laziness on not crediting the artist. I apologize again.

Credit to @ave661

“I’m scared Keegs”

*clinging to his arm and breathing heavily and tears falling down her cheeks*

“Kid? Look at me?”

*he sighs and gathers his thoughts before speaking again to her*

I’m so sorry baby look at me. We’re gonna make it out together. Me and you.”

The sounds of gunfire getting louder and closer. Sounds of explosions getting closer as well. He looks out the window looking for a way to escape and he tries to call Hesh and Logan on his radio. It’s all static. He looks back at (y/n). Seeing how scared she is makes his heartbreak and he starts to tremble with fear. He knows they can’t be captured.

Looking at his beloved trembling face. He walks over to her grabbing her face in his hands he kisses her passionately. Soft moans escape her lips and his lips.

“Baby look at me, you have to trust me okay?

*he presses his forehead against hers looking down at her*

She trembles with fear. She nods her head to him.

“Okay”

She sighs and bites down on her lower lip looking at him.*

“Baby you see the building right there?

He points to the building across them. He holds her close to his chest. He smells the rose shampoo smell from hair. The smell makes him calm down and think of her safety more then his.

“Yeah?”

She trembles and answers his weakly. She clings to his vest with desperation.

“I’m gonna throw you across okay”

He looks around, he has to make a decision quickly. Time is running out.

“Baby don’t leave me alone. I want you to be with me I’m not going alone.”

She realizes he only mentions her. And that he’s not gonna be joining her.

“(Y/N) I love you okay!”

He grabs her gently holding her face so she can look at him and listen to him.

“Please don’t fight with me on this?”

“I will find my way around, I can’t have you here if they find us. These men will not treat you with respect. They will do horrific things to you. I don’t want them to touch you. I will do anything, anything in the world to protect you my love. You mean everything to me. Your my moon to my night sky, the stars that light up my entire sky. Without you, being my stars I have no way on navigating my way back to you.”

He gets shy but he finally allows all of his emotions out to her. He starts to speak from the heart.

“I will always find my way back to you (y/n). I know you’re scared, I’m scared too. But I’m more scared of losing you. I don’t know what I would do if I lost you.”

His eyes start to water up.

“I would never forgive myself for that.”

He wipes the tears from his eyes. Smearing the black paint on his face.

She blushes at his response. She starts to cry, she grabs his and holding him in a tight embrace. She cry’s into his vest.

“Keegan Russ I love you. I love you so much. My love for you is like all the worlds beaches. Every grain of sand is how much I love you.”

“Keegan please come back to me. I won’t be able to survive without you in this life if I lose you.”

“I will always come back to you. I will always find my way back to you and to hold you in my arms.”

He hugs her tightly. Holding her close he feels her warmth.

Keegan opens the window looking around to see if any of the federation soldiers are near by. He quickly gathers his things and her stuff. She nods to him that’s she ready.

“I’m sorry about this baby it’s gonna hurt like hell.”

He throws her to the building next to them. She lands hard on the roof and scrapes her arms and elbows I’m the process. She rolls over and see Keegan standing there. She hears the sounds of someone trying to break open the door where Keegan is at.

“Keegs jump now!”

Keegan looks around him and he nods to her. He turns around and gets a running start. He jumps across to her. She runs to the edge she grabs his arms and catches him.

He dangles from the side of the building. She gasps with fear and pain as she caught her lover.

“Baby hold on, I’m not gonna let you go, hold on!”

She gasps and panting heavily as she pulls him up.

She pulls him up and they hide together on the roof top. He uses his body to shield her in case someone starts to shoot. The static on her radio crackles with the sound of Hesh voice. She perks up to the familiar voice.

“Baby it’s Hesh”

She passes the radio to him. She sighs with excitement.

“Hesh this is Keegan do you copy over”

He takes the radio and answers with relief.

“Keegan hear you loud and clear. What’s your twenty?”

“We thought we lost you? Is (y/n) with you?”

Hesh is relieved to know Keegan is alive but he worries for (y/n).

“Yeah she’s with me we’re okay. We need help we’re trapped on a rooftop. We don’t have enough ammo to get us out of here without a fight.”

“I can give a description of our location”

Keegan describes the location to Hesh over the radio.

“Sit tight we’re coming”

Hesh ends his call.

The federation search team walk pass them and they continue their patrols and advance forward. The others a ghosts show up be rescue Keegan and (Y/N). As they are leaving she holds Keegans hand as they make their way to safety.

-A Few Days Later-

“Keegan I love you more then you know. I will always be there at your side no matter the cost. If I have to sacrifice myself to be with you I will do it in a heartbeat. My life isn’t complete without you.”

“I’ve always been honest with you. And this is me being honest to you.”

She smiles to him. Looking up to him.

“Yes! Yes Keegan I will agree to be Mrs Keegan Russ. I know you asked me before and I had cold feet at the time. But this time yes, yes, I want to be with you forever. I want to be Mrs Keegan Russ.”

She holds out her hands to him

Keegan smiles to her pulling the wall blue box from his pocket.

He takes the ring out to place it on her finger.

She starts to cry. She hugs him tightly.

Keegan looks at his fiancée. He smiles to her kissing her forehead.

“(Y/N) we have a wedding to plan now.”

She looks at her engagement ring and jumps into Keegans arms. He picks her up bridal style and carries her to the ghosts to announce their news to them.

[rhaecerys-velaryo]

Knight!Keegan x Princess!OC

Knight! Keegan P. Russ x Princess!OC Summary: Ser Keegan is the sworn guard and protector of the Princess. He grew up with her and he was her confidante. One day, he hears of the proposal made between the Princess and a neighboring prince and just needs to tell her how he feels. This is my first one-shot and I am simply trying with an OC first before doing reader inserts or you/reader one-shots. ------------------------------------------------------------------ They had known each other all their lives, Rhaecerys and Keegan, inseparable companions from childhood. Born into neighboring kingdoms, their families had fostered a close bond that transcended mere diplomacy. Keegan, with his steadfast loyalty and gentle demeanor, had always been Rhaecerys's closest confidant, her pillar of support through the trials of royal upbringing.

But as they grew older, the weight of their royal destinies loomed larger. One day, amidst the intricate tapestry of political alliances and ambitions, Rhaecerys was informed she would marry royalty from another kingdom, a union forged to strengthen diplomatic ties.

Eager to see who she would be betrothed to, Rhaecerys reluctantly agreed, concealing her inner turmoil beneath a veneer of regal composure. However, Keegan's reaction was starkly different. He could not conceal his disapproval and stormed out of the Royal Palace, his usually calm demeanor shattered by the news.

That night, under the cover of darkness, Keegan sneaked into Rhaecerys's castle. He knocked urgently on her door, his voice pleading and desperate. "Your Highness... Rhaecerys Velaro. It's me. Please, listen. I beg of you, I can love you better than he ever could. Don't leave me," Keegan implored, his words fraught with emotion.

"Don't go."

Rhaecerys's heart thudded in her chest as she opened the door. Her eyes widened as she saw Keegan standing before her, his usually composed demeanor now stripped away, replaced by raw vulnerability. He pleaded with her not to marry another, to stay with him. She couldn't believe what he was saying, and for a moment, she stood frozen, unable to speak.

Finally, she took a deep breath and spoke softly, her voice trembling slightly. "Keegan, what are you saying? This is madness."

Keegan's eyes reflected the turmoil within him. "Madness, yes. But it's true," he stepped closer, his body language revealing the depth of his emotion. "I don't want you to marry another, Rhae, not when I... I... I love you."

The admission hung in the air, starkly honest and filled with vulnerability.

As Keegan stepped closer, Rhaecerys's breath caught in her throat. She could see the raw, honest emotion in his eyes, and she knew he meant every word he was saying.

She took a step back, feeling overwhelmed by his confession. "Keegan, you can't... I'm royalty. I have responsibilities."

But even as she spoke, she couldn't ignore the flutter in her chest at his words. The realization that he loved her sent a wave of shock and warmth through her body.

Keegan closed the distance she put between them, the intensity in his eyes unwavering. "Responsibilities be damned, Rhae. I don't care about titles or duties. I care about you, and your happiness. And being married to some stranger isn't going to make you happy. But being with me..."

His voice trailed off, his hand reaching out to touch her face.

Keegan studied the conflict in Rhaecerys's eyes, his hand gently cupping her cheek. Their faces were only inches apart.

"I know you're torn," he said in a low voice, "Duty versus desire. I get it. But please, think about what you really want. Not what's expected of you. Not what you think you should do. But what your heart truly desires."

His thumb traced a gentle path over her cheek, the touch both comforting and electrifying.

Rhaecerys's breath hitched at the touch of Keegan's thumb against her skin. She closed her eyes for a moment, struggling to find her voice.

"I can't just... ignore my responsibilities, Keegan," she whispered, her voice trembling. "I have a duty to my kingdom, to my family. I can't just throw everything away for... whatever this is."

But even as she spoke, she knew her words weren't entirely true. Deep down, she yearned for Keegan, for his touch, for his love.

Keegan's eyes were steady on hers, his own feelings burning in them. "I know it's not black and white," he said in that deep, low voice, his fingers moving to brush a strand of hair from her face, "But that's exactly why you're doubting. Your heart is at war with your head."

He took another step closer, his body almost flush against hers. His warm breath ghosted over her face. "Trust your heart, Rhae. Just this once. Please."

Rhaecerys's eyes fluttered shut again as Keegan's breath washed over her skin. His closeness was intoxicating, making her head spin. But his words struck a chord deep within her, and she couldn't deny the truth in them.

She opened her eyes and looked up at him, her voice barely above a whisper. "And if I do trust my heart... what then?"

Keegan's breath caught in his throat for a moment, and he had to swallow hard before speaking. When he did, his voice was gruff, intense.

"Then..." he murmured, his fingers tracing the line of her jaw, "Then you'll stay with me."

He stepped even closer, leaving almost no space between their bodies. His hand moved to her waist, pulling her flush against him. "You'll be mine, and I'll be yours."

As Keegan pulled her against him, Rhaecerys let out a gasp, her body melting into his. The feel of his strong arms around her and the scent of him so close sent a shiver down her spine.

"Keegan..." she breathed, her hand coming up to rest on his chest, feeling the steady beat of his heart. "Are you... sure you want me?"

Keegan could feel the quickening of her heartbeat as her hand touched his chest, and he inhaled deeply, savoring her scent and her closeness.

"More sure than I've ever been about anything in my life," he said, his voice a low rumble. "I've been in love with you for longer than I can remember. You're the only one I've ever wanted."

His arms tightened around her, holding her close against him. "The question is, do you want me?"

Keegan's grip on her tightened slightly as he heard the vulnerability in her voice, sensing the fear that lay beneath her words. He lifted his hand to gently cup her face, his thumb tracing a soothing pattern across her skin.

"Scared of what?" he asked, his voice gentle but unwavering. "Scared of what your family will think? Or scared of what you're feeling?"

"Both," Rhaecerys admitted quietly, her eyes meeting his. "I fear how they will react if I abandon my duty. And... I fear what this could mean for us."

She took a deep breath, her heart thumping rapidly in her chest. "I'm afraid to let myself go, to give in to these feelings between us, because... I'm terrified to lose you."

Keegan's expression softened further as he listened to her, his gaze never leaving hers. He understood her fear, her hesitation, and her concerns. He had them too.

"I can't promise it will be easy, Rhae," he said in a low voice. "We'll have to face your family, your responsibilities, and the world. But…"

He shifted, his other hand coming up to rest on her hip as he pulled her even closer, his face inches from hers. "But I can promise I won't ever leave you. No matter what happens."

Rhaecerys's breath hitched at the intensity in Keegan's eyes as he pulled her even closer, their faces so close their noses were nearly touching. Her heart thudded in her chest, the heat from his body and his words sending a shiver down her spine.

"I... I believe you," she whispered, her voice shaking slightly. "But are you sure you want to put up with the chaos that comes with being with me? The scrutiny, the judgment, the pressure...?"

Keegan chuckled softly, a hint of a smirk tugging at the corners of his lips. He knew well what he was getting himself into.

"Darling," he said, the word a gentle caress against her skin, "Compared to battlefields swarming with enemies and impossible missions with little chance of survival, dealing with scrutiny, judgment, and pressure is a walk in the park."

His hand on her hip moved to brush a strand of hair from her face. "And being with you is worth every bit of it."

[letsscreamwithme]

Doom Patrol headcanons Larry edition

He regularly visits Danny. Yes, Keeg has seen a drag show. Occasionally Larry brings Rama with him. Everytime he brings Rama that's a karaoke night, Rama convinces him to join him. Larry says he hates it but then Rama reminds him that he very rarely invites him on non-karaoke nights.

That's it, that's the post/j

Larry is really good at remembering details about people so much so he can easily tell when Jane's in front and when Hammerhead is in front.

Speaking of Jane and co, Babydoll treats him like a father.

[freyjas-light]

hi, I have a question. I just started researching seidr magic and I saw that it is a woman's-only magic/space and that it was a type of magic made for women, is that true? idk if this is bad to say but it would be nice if cis and trans women and afab nb witches had their own space/magic away from men who practice. I just didn't know who to ask, I see you are Norse pagan and witch, and idk if this is a bad POV, and if it is I want to correct myself...

Hey anon! This is a really interesting question so let's get into some facts:

Seidr was just one type of magic practiced during the Viking/Iron age. It is believed that seidr was more focused on prophecy and divination, and was at the time, primarily practiced by Völvas. Seidr is considered to be a way of connecting to the Nornir and accessing the threads of fate (meanwhile, today the term seidr encompasses all types of norse based magic). The connection to weaving could explain why it is believed to be considered a more feminine practice, as men did not learn these skills. Seidr can also be known as Spá/Spae, and while some people believe these are two different types of magic, they both stem from wanting to determine one's fate. The other types of norse magic include Galdr, which included chanting to help raise energy for healing and protection. Historically, it seems that any gender could practice galdr, but it tends to be viewed as the more "masculine" form of magic.

When it comes to practicing these forms of magic, we all know Odin as the defier of these social and gender norms. Odin, ruler of Asgard, does not care about the trivial genders assigned to magic, he just wants to learn, to understand the power that this form of magic holds. And while I know this information about Odin is common knowledge, I feel that it is important to highlight as it shows that rules can be broken, and gender roles do not matter. We also do not have a lot of facts about historical seidr. Most of what we know comes from the sagas, and we have found some grave sites that include distaffs and staffs that can corroborate the information in these stories. But we do not have a lot of information about how seidr was practiced. I feel that this lack of information makes it hard to form solid opinions on what seidr used to be like.

However, the term Völva/Völur is specifically a women-only role. Men could be seidmenn, seidmadr, or vitki, but never a Völva.

In today's society, Norse paganism prides itself on being gender inclusive. Anyone can practice seidr, and there are very few exclusive circles (luckily I've avoided any that might be out there). However I understand your want for a safe space. I find that my local norse pagan community is mostly comprised of males, and that is the reason that I am a solo practicioner. Tumblr is a huge help in finding like-minded, safe people to share my practice with. So while you won't find any gender exclusive magic in the practice of seidr anymore, I hope you can still find a safe space for you to hone your skills and share your thoughts.

[donewithflare]

[ ☎ ] my muse calls yours in tears. [ keegan → zaya; when they were teenagers. ]

The cordless phone buzzed loudly on hook echoing loudly through the Dolma apartment. Zaya rushed to the phone in hopes not to miss it, her parents yet to invest in a phone with a decent called ID as it was too pricy. "I'll get it mom!" Zaya yelled at the top of her lungs as her room spread through their tiny Brooklyn Apartment. She picked up the large beige, answering the polite way her parents had taught her too. "Hello Dolma residence, who may I ask is calling?" With no reply, half expecting it to be some dumb cold call, she was about to hang up the phone. When she heard some wet, snotty sniffling over the phone. A sound she was pretty familiar with.

A cocky smirk appeared on her lips, knowing this would be fun. She slide on the kitchen counter, getting herself comfy and ready to chew out her favorite person. "Oh for fucksakes Dweeb,what did you do?" Only to be followed by more sniffling, she tucks her legs together on the counter,"Who's ass am I beating up now for you? Cause I still haven't fully recovered from the last beatdown." She smiled softly looking at her bloodied and bruised arms that Keegan had delicately bandaged with extra care after her last fight. Zaya smiles softly at how careful he was. His hands were meant for healing. Her hands only destruction. A perfect balance between the two. "You know you really gotta stop getting into fights defending my ass. Doesn't really matter to me what other people think of me." Only you though. Zaya laughs in hopes to lighten the mood. Yet he keeps on crying.

Her grip on the phone tightens, as she jumps of the counter, ready to bounce into action. "Okay who's fucking ass am I going to need to beat?" Zaya already cracking her knocks and stretching out,"I can last a few rounds. Bring the first aid kit, this other asshole is not gonna know what hit them!" Yet there is still him weeping on the phone. No usual protests or warnings for her to be careful. None of him taking the blame and saying it was his fault. This was not what her Keegan was like.

She leans against the wall, pushing the phone closer to ear like how close she would want him to be if he were here right this moment. "Keegs..."her tone softens desperate to get some coherent words out of him,"Please...please tell me what's wrong. You're making me worried. Come on, it's me..." her tone is sincere, full of care. She finds her free hand clinging tightly to her chest where her heart is meant to be. Although, she wouldn't admit it out loud...Keegan played a pretty important part of heart.

Hearing him cry was killing her. "Speak to me or I'm coming over!" Zaya was almost ready to hang up the phone and make her way over to his to comfort him. But then there as an inaudible mumbling from his send. "Woah, say that again this time more slowly and clearer!" Again he talks fast. It was time to pull out the big guns,"Five seconds to tell me properly or else, I'm telling your mom." And with those words he sung like a Canary.

"The Fuck Keegs ...you are crying because you don't have a freaking prom date. Proms are lame anyway," Zaya commented chewing hard on the inside of her cheek. "Who did you ask...you know for reasons....no I'm not going to be making a hitlist with all the bitches who said now to you ass wipe." Which was a very blatant lie. Only she was allowed to kick his ass. Or make him cry. "Listen Keegs," she sighed, "Anyone would be lucky to go to the prom with you." She pauses, "Fuck it, if you don't have a date then I'll be your date, okay?"

The words slip out before she could think. A long pause between them follows. He isn't crying anymore. Zaya, however, wonders if she had crossed a line between them. The very fine line between love and hate. Maybe she shouldn't have said a thing. The silence breaks by a female voice on the other end of the phone.

"So will you got to prom with him then?"

Zaya is taken back by the other voice on the phone. Her tone quickly switches to a polite with undertones of I'm going to kill you later Keegan, in it. "Oh, Mrs Jeong, hi there, Keegan didn't mention you were also in this call."

"So will you, Zaya?" her voice filled with hope for her little boy.

"Sure...yes I will go to the prom with Keegan," Zaya feels her cheeks blush as she smiles. She can hear the two of them whispering and high fiving over the other side of the phone. "But do you mind if I walk to Keegan alone for a moment.?" There is more whispering on the other side as he is trying to dismiss his mom away for them to have a moment alone.

When the line was left for the two of them, there was another brief pause."So does this count as me asking you out or your mom ask me out for you dweeb?" She pauses,"You know you didn't have to ask...I kind figured we would end up going together anyway. You can be suck a fucking idiot sometimes." Zaya continues to carelessly laugh "Promise me, you'll never change Keegs?"

[childofposiden71]

Ain't that the truth Pt. 2 ( final part)

Larry walked up the steps to John’s place, holding Rama’s hand tightly. He was a smidge anxious about the meeting. He just hoped Keeg would behave. Larry knocked on the door twice. 

“ Darling! You’re here! Just come in, please. It’s unlocked”, John called from inside the house. 

The tension eased from Larry’s shoulders as he unlocked the door and walked in. With Rama following. They entered the house and Keeg exploded out of Larry, going to explore the new surroundings. Larry went down the hall to John’s bedroom. 

John smiled widely at the two of them, “ Larry, are you finally getting laid?”, he teased.

Larry stopped dead in his tracks. He swore he was blushing so hard, it could be seen through his bandages 

“ Not yet, sir. And to be honest, I’m not that into sex”, Rama said as he walked over with an extended hand. 

John shook his hand, “ You must be Rama, Lare, speaks the world of you and I can see why also don’t me , sir”, he snickered a little.

Rama smiled as he spotted a picture of Larry, Pre accident. “ Is this our Larry?”, he asked.

“ Yep, before the crash. How can you tell?”, John’s smile lessened a little.

Larry’s gaze turned to Rama. 

“ Because there’s no one else as handsome as our Larry, on your mantle”, Rama said with a gentle shrug. 

John laughed, “ain’t that the truth”.

Larry would argue but he knew arguing with John, would be pointless. So he just sat back and listened to John and Rama talk. Basking in the comfort he felt

[xkeeanx]

《NIGHTMARES》

NONE POV:

Hesh had been having nightmares waking up screaming for either keegan, Elias, logan, kick, or merrick. "He's loosing so much sleep dad" logan says "do you know what might be causing it" he asked again, Elias sighs before speaking "it might be ptsd from the incident" they were both silent before kick interrupted "what incident"  he said in a confused tone "remember when rorke took logan and hesh tried to stop him but he failed" merrick said "right.." Kick said it was silent again until he spoke again. "I'll take care of hesh if he gets another nightmare,"

☆3 hours later☆

"Hey, keegs," I spoke. "keegs? is that my new nickname logan" "yep. anyways I just realized that you're shorter than hesh." I continued."Uh... shush, "  he said, and his face flushed with embarrassment. we both looked at the stairs as we saw kick running up the stairs "hesh's nightmares"

KICKS POV:

I run upstairs, having heard hesh's scream, I open the door and see him sitting up and covered in a cold sweat, breathing heavily "hey hesh... what happened? " he looks at me and goes on to tell me about his nightmares "hey its okay, " I say as I sit beside him and rub his back. there was a long comfortable silence, and then I spoke, "Do you want me to make you forget for a little bit?" he thinks and says, "Yes.. please, " I turn his head towards me and kiss him. He holds my waist as I do that, and I get on his lap. I start grinding against him slowly "mmh~" he moaned out. I quickly unbuckle are Belts and take are pants and boxers off, hesh breaks the kiss and brings his figures to my mouth "suck." he demands, and I do as told, running my tongue in between his fingers. after a good amount of sucking he pulls them out of my mouth and brings them to my hole, slowly pushing them in. "aHh~!" I moan in pain and pleasure. after 5 minutes of him figuring me he pulls his fingers out and lines his cock up with my hole and slowly let me fall onto it "FUCK! MMH~ ITS SO MMPH~ ITS SO BIG!" I moan out as I feel tears well up in my eyes and quickly fall down my cheeks as my ass finally reached the base of his cock. me and hesh both pant waiting for one of us to move. I rock my hips back and forth, watching the outline of his cock through my stomach. I reach my hand down to my stomach and rub his cock through it. he groans and lifts me up and drops me back down, letting his cock hit my prostate over and over again picking up speed until he's going as fast as he can "FUCK HESH! FUCK IT FEELS SO FUCKING GOOD~ YES YES~!" I moan out "ya ah~ ya you like that, you little whore~ who does my slut belong to~"  I hear him groan out "YOU! IM YOUR SLUT~ FUCK~ IM SO CLOSE! PLEASE SIR~ LET ME CUM!"  I scream out in pleasure  "not ah~ hah~ not yet" he says and covers my slit so I can't cum "FUCK! PLEASE~ I NEED TO! PLEASE~!" I say "fuck~,fuck! FUCK~!" I hear him say as he cums deep inside me and takes his thumb off my slit and I cum all over his hand and chest. me and hesh were panting heavily. "Good boy~" he says, pulling out of me. "Let's get each other cleaned up."

Word count:601

[sadnsxft]

“Isaac!” Keegan exclaims, “we can’t find Hesh. He disappeared from medical and now no one-“

“Woah, slow down Keegs,” Isaac placates “I just saw him. He’s heading back to medical now.”

With that reassurance Keegan visibly calms.

“Thank god. We thought…” Keegan struggles to finish the sentence.

“You thought Rourke might have come back to finish the job?” Isaac probes

Keegan nods. There is a serious look in his eye as if he was accounting for such a thing to happen before Hesh even decided to run away. Keegan is always prepared for the worst. Always wound tight in case he has to spring into action at any moment.

Isaac isn’t prepared for the weight of that look on Keegan’s bare face as opposed to when it’s covered behind a layer of eye black and a cotton mask.

Despite how frayed his emotions are from bringing up his brother Arthur, Isaac is still struck with the need to protect, to assure

“Hey, it’ll be okay.” He says to Keegan. His hand twitches with the desire to clasp onto Keegan’s shoulder, but he holds himself back.

“Hesh and Logan are Ghosts now. I know you’ll all fight like hell to protect each other and fight even harder to get the kid back.”

Keegan gives Isaac a small smile, and after a beat of silence responds with, “You too, ya know.”

Isaac blinks at him. His confusion must show on his face because Keegan clarifies, “I know you aren’t gonna rest until Logan is safe and back home, just like the rest of us. And,” Keegan then surprises Isaac by reaching out hold onto HIS shoulder, “we’ll protect you too.”

Keegan waits for Isaac to respond, but Isaac can’t. He wasn’t expecting that. Even before they suspected him of being a traitor, Isaac never considered himself apart of the Ghosts.

Sensing that Isaac couldn’t say anything. Keegan continued on.

“We were wrong to suspect you. I was wrong to doubt you. I’m sorry Isaac. Just know that from now on, we have your back.”

Isaac still doesn’t speak, just stares at Keegan with wide eyes. When they start to brim with tears Keegan grows concerned. He places his other hand on Isaacs opposite shoulder, grounding him with his touch

“Isaac, what’s wrong.”

Isaac has not felt this small since he was a child. In a shaky voice he whispers “I need to tell you something.”

“What is it?” Keegan asks

“I lied to you”

((Okay one more after this hopefully))

WHAT IS THIS CLIFFHANGER AHHHHH