#kazzy rambles

[kazoosandfannypacks]

Okay I. I'm just now realizing.

Several months ago, while vacationing with my friends, the topic of AI came up in discussion between me and one of my friends. We both knew each other's stance on AI going into it (me being adamantly against generative AI and him wholeheartedly supporting it and enjoying the use of it) and had discussed it before, so it was more a conversation of attempting to understand each other's viewpoint rather than change it.

At some point, the conversation turned to something that he, someone who rarely dabbles in the creative arts, had yet to realize, that art is about the process. Of course, for someone who loves coding and finding ways to cheat the system, the idea that the process of a work is the important part of the work was a foreign concept.

That discussion ties in a lot to this post. Most of my writer friends understand the concept of "plot bunnies," of writing one story concept only to come up with seven more, and while we complain and meme and joke about it, this is where a lot of our favorite story ideas come from— we couldn't write nearly as many stories if we weren't actively involved in the process of writing them in the first place.

What does generative AI do to this process? If we're not immersing ourselves in the stories we write— because we're not even writing them— will we still have as many ideas? If we're crowdsourcing to plagarism software for the processing of our ideas into stories, where on the assembly line do we fit in? Does each word resonate with our touch? Does our wrestle with writer's block create a deeper and richer story? Does our time spent marinating in these characters, themes, and ideas— time spent struggling alongside them, laughing and crying and rejoicing alongside them, growing alongside them as they do— does this break the dam of a wellspring of new ideas for the taking, for us to create, for us to continue this millennia old process of storytelling, handed down from one generation to the next?

No. We have removed ourselves from the process entirely.

You will not use AI to get ideas for your story. You will lie on the floor and have wretched visions like god intended

[kazaleas]

It feels empty. It feels really empty. You've checked the same 3 apps on your phone every few minutes that pass, you've tried to get out of bed and just ended up back in the same sheets with a headache keeping you awake, you've tossed and turned and kicked and rocked, but nothing works to ease this silent loud noise in your ears. It's like your head is full of so much noise and everything is so loud but at the same time it's so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. Everythings pissing you off, everything hurts, every noise someone else makes has you In the mindset of wanting to absolutely bash their face into an unrecognizable mess, just because you don't want to hear them anymore. This feeling, this dreaded feeling, this painful annoying ache that you can't get rid of.

You can't even look at your favorite people anymore without feeling queasy, you've kept everything to yourself since you started feeling like this again, you can't even do anything around anyone anymore without being asked the horrid question of: “are you okay”. It feels like someone shoved you into a human centrifuge and turned it on 15 different times without breaks in-between. Your heart feels like it's flattening in your chest, sinking, dropping, bleeding, trying to claw it's way out of your skin and run away from this place. Your mind feels heavy, like someone's injected weights into your body and put two large bowling balls on your shoulders and your head and your ankles. You can hear your heartbeat in your ears and it sounds wrong, every single smell coming to your noise makes your stomach start to churn. You wanna go to sleep, you wanna crawl into a dripping wet and cold cave and just sleep, and maybe you wont wake up for a week, or a month, or forever.

Your phone vibrates, you see the notification. It's them. You can't bring yourself to open your phone, its like whatever's taking over your mind and body is pricking at your skin with pins and needles and forcing you to lower the device. It's heavy, it feels heavier than normal, it's so. Fucking. Heavy. The phone starts to ring, the tone you set from a song you like starts to play. You like this song, but now all it does is piss you off, all you wanna do is take this heavy rectangle and smash it against the wall until it shuts up. You don't pick up. It rings, and rings, and rings, and you don't pick up. It's only till later, when it's finally stopped ringing for a while, that the weight sets in, and you curl up while icy crystal waters start to churn from your eyes. You're crying, you can feel it on your skin but not in your heart. But you're crying. And it hurts. And now you regret the fact that you didn't pick up the phone.

[gongedtornado]

.

[kazzykatt]

oh the curse of wanting to leave long comments on fics but not speaking the language good enough for it to makes sense qwq

[kazoosandfannypacks]

"Kazzy?" You may ask me, "Why are you reblogging a gifset for a show you've never watched?"

It's past 12am. I'm scrolling tumblr and I see this quote and I recognize it INSTANTLY and know exactly what show it's from. I see that there's a link to the inspiration and go "aha! I'm about to see a gifset with scenes from this show I love! And especially the character I love who said this quote!"

I click the link and am sent to another gifset, with this same quote, for another ship from another show I've never watched! But, this time it is about my "emotional support otp from a fandom I'm not in," a ship my mutuals talk about enough I may as well write fic for them. So at least I'm getting closer! And lo and behold, it has a link for where it got its inspiration!

And does this link to the original ship? No. It leads to a gifset for a ship I've never heard of from a show I've never watched. Same quote as the others, and OP is raving in the tags about how much they love the quote, but does not cite a source for the quote or link another gifset for inspiration.

"Surely I'm not the only one who knows the source of this quote," I think. I check the notes on this post. No one. I check the notes on the post it links to. No one. I check the notes on the original. No one. Not a single person involved in this scenario whatsoever has mentioned the source for this quote.

So maybe I'm going crazy and this isn't the quote I think it is, right? Luckily for me, I have an easy way to check that out that doesn't involve looking up online transcripts or rewatching episodes, because I was so feral about this quote when I first heard it I have it hanging up next to my bed.

Also I think it's a total tragedy that none of these posts included (probably because most of them didn't know about) the "and at the end, when you're in love, no matter what happens, you forgive each other. I forgive you."

Anyways, everybody say thank you to Will Scarlet from Once Upon a Time in Wonderland for inventing romance ❤️

CHICAGO FIRE (2012 -)

STELLA KIDD and KELLY SEVERIDE (insp)

[kazunarei]

The mad ramblings of a stupid person round 2

The story isn't gonna end when/if Eiden regulates the Dark Altar.

"But Kazzie there was a interview where a writer said they were nearing the end of the story."

Yeah the end of the story of figuring out where the fuck Huey was.

And we found him. But for some reason he's in LA LA Land so after we slap Rin upside the head a few times to get him to behave the next story beat will be trying to find why he's asleep. And possibly wake him up. (ノ゜ο゜)ノ

[piraterefrigerator]

I would put this in a reblog for that anon, but because I don't want to subject my followers to such negativity, even when unfounded and disputed, I'll just say it here: Liam Jones was EVERYTHING for Killian. Liam helped make Killian who he was. If not for Liam, Killian would've died a bitter and alcoholic slave onboard a merchant's ship two hundred years before the show even takes place.

Liam only shows up in TWO episodes. TWO! In one of them, he's shown helping Killian not dwell on his pain, helping Killian find a way out of their horrible lot in life, and even waiting to leave slavery until Killian is able to leave with him. If Liam only cared about himself, he wouldn't've stuck around after Killian accidentally gambled away the price of his freedom. Liam is then shown standing up for the lives of his crew! (I will argue that him accepting Hades' deal and selling them out was a bit of jerk move, but even in the context of the show it's not regarded as the right choice for him to have made, and it CANNOT be said that he did this for his own good and not Killian's as well.

And then we have him in Good Form, where he's a little stubborn- but thinkj of all he's put on the line. Liam has been banking EVERYTHING (getting out of slavery, selling out the crew, accepting this commission, his and Killian's future) on service to the king. If the king is not to be trusted, if the crown and kingdom are dishonorable and not worth fighting for, if the navy itself is corrupt, then they have NOTHING. They have NOTHING apart from the navy- the king HAS to be right, otherwise he's banked their entire future on nothing. His stubbornness in this episode is borne of his love for his brother and hope for their future.

And then in The Brothers Jones, it can be argues that, yeah, he wasn't always perfect there. No, he shouldn't've kept working with Hades, but he really did trap himself in a web there. YES he should've been honest about everything with Killian from the very beginning- just like Killian should've been honest about the shears in s6 and Emma should've been honest about making Killian a dark one in s5 and David should've been honest about the dreamshade in s3 and Gold should've been honest about the dagger in s4, and Milah should've been honest about her strained feelings with RUmple in s2, and Killian should've been honest about his deal with Rumple in s4... the point is, a LOT of characters in this show mess up. That's part of how a story is structured, it's part of conflict, it's part of the drama that drama shows are based on. So much of this show WOULD be better if people knew how to communicate and ask for help- we can't pin all of that on Liam.

I also do see how it can be seen as "selfish" for Liam to want Killian to move on with him from the Underworld- just like it was "selfish"for Emma to make Killian a Dark One and "selfish" for Killian to keep the shears of fate... and the reason why we can move on from these acts of selfishness? Because in the end they did the right thing. In the end, Liam is truly sorry for what he did, and in the end, he respects Killian's decision not to move on yet.

Liam messed up once or twice, but so did EVERYONE in this show, and he does NOT deserve slander for it!

ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIC TAKE KAZZY!! Although I must admit that ask was all in good fun. No actual negativity!! Just friends sending one another anon slander to warrant rambles and rants

[she-who-the-river-could-not-hold]

02. A Familiar Ache

part of Broken Wings, a Whumptober-inspired Six of Crows Prompt Collection prompt: ENOUGH IS ENOUGH | Knees Buckling | Repeatedly Passing Out | Head Lolling | ship: Wesper | rating: M | wc: ~1.7k | tags: Modern AU, Exes, Drinking and gambling addictions, friend group in minor turmoil as they transition to new lives, emphasis on dealing with alcoholism

Summary: Wylan broke up with Jesper for lying to him about how much he was drinking. But it turns out that when Jesper’s honest about being drunk, he still chooses his ex-boyfriend to help him. And Wylan can’t help but go to him.

––––

The first time that Jesper’s name appeared on Wylan’s phone, he stared at it in shock until it finished ringing.

The second time he called, Wylan clicked it off in a half-second.

The third time, he answered.

“Jesper,” Wylan greeted him without waiting for his ex-boyfriend to say anything, voice laced with exasperation, “what do you want? It’s one in the morning.” 

A chuckle echoed through the phone and Wylan despised the shivers that it sent down his spine. The sudden intimacy of Jesper’s laugh so close to his ear, a ghost of so many memories, was disorientating and did little to help his quest to get over the guy.

“I might need a little help,” drawled Jesper. 

A coldness overtook the little bit of warmth that Wylan had experienced. Of course. Jesper was fucking drunk out of his mind. He could hear it in the slur of his words, the deepness that accompanied it when he’d had a few too many Jameson and gingers. A lethargicness to his words as his alcohol-filled brain fought to string sentences together. He always pulled it off, but it was like you could hear the mechanics of his mind whirring in the process.

“So call Kaz, not me,” Wylan bit out. No, he didn’t resent that the two were still close even though Kaz had been the first to warn him about Jesper’s proclivities. 

A laugh that turned into a hiccup burned his ears through his phone.

“Kaz-Kazzy, he’s pissed at me. Besides, it’s his anniversary with darling Inej. I’ll wake up without eyeballs if I interrupt that.”

Wylan hated how much it made sense.

Jesper continued rambling about the ways that Kaz would mutilate him while Wylan wracked his brain for anyone else that Jesper could have called. Their friends still overlapped, a tricky element that he still couldn’t get a handle on, and surely there was someone else that Jesper could have called. But with Inej and Kaz out of the equation, that left Nina and Matthias. And Nina had only been home from rehab for a couple months––Matthias was even more protective of her than normal. An inebriated Jesper calling seemed like a recipe for disaster. 

“So you called me,” he said flatly, not really asking, “because you knew I’d do it.”

Tears infuriatingly pricked at his eyes. Dependable Wylan who never said no. Boring Wylan who of course wouldn’t have a reason that he couldn’t come pick up the pieces of the mess, as usual. When was enough going to be enough?

Jesper’s snort of surprise pulled him out of his wallowing.

“Because you're a good person, Wy,” he said with startling clarity.

Somehow that made it worse.

[READ THE REST ON AO3]

[kazoosandfannypacks]

No you guys don't understand.

Percy had the chance to save his mom, which was the reason he took this quest in the first place. He was the one the sea entrusted with these pearls, and he could've made it his responsibility to make sure nothing happened to them. He could've carried all four pearls himself, and he would've saved his mom.

But he didn't want to run the risk of losing any of his friends, so he entrusted each of them with a pearl. He didn't have to do this, but he wanted to make sure they had a chance to save themselves if they needed to. Why? Because he's loyal to them.

His loyalty is his fatal flaw, and this illustrates that point very well. If his fatal flaw was ambition, he wouldn't've given up the pearls and their power so easily. If his fatal flaw was holding grudges, he wouldn't've given the pearl to someone who'd just made him miss his appointment with his dad. If his fatal flaw was hubris, he would've kept the pearls for himself, believing he could save them all himself if he needed to.

But because his fatal flaw is loyalty, he didn't keep all the pearls to himself until needed. Because his fatal flaw is loyalty, he made sure his friends would make it out of the underworld alive. And, because his fatal flaw is loyalty, he failed to save what mattered most in the end.

and THAT'S why the fourth pearl is important

[kazaleas]

I am a firm believer that Donnie listens to glass animals but specifically the Dreamland album. Like he gives major "Your love, Deja vu" vibes & "tokyo drifting". This is all because I saw fanart one time and now I can't unsee it.

[phoenixdaneko]

where are your ocs? let me see them i wanna see them 👀

Haha, sure thing Kazzy <3

These are all Phoenix, my main oc/self insert! The kid in the bottom right drawing is Mieko Grim, her kid in one universe lmao,,,

This is Ivy and Sakura, Ivy's the demon with well, all the ivy, and Sakura is the angel.

These three are all unnamed as of now, but they're besties.

Also unnamed, but they'll play a role in my upcoming standard au SB fic! The girl in the tank top is the older sister of the little girl. Still need to name them, lmao.

She's from the same outfit ask games as the two above, and yet again, has no name. I really need to get around to naming them all.

And the most recent oc I've drawn in a magma. Yeah, still don't know their name, but they've got a TV for a head and I drew cool glitch effects.

Ty for the ask!!! I love rambling about my OCS lmao

[kazoosandfannypacks]

Nobody has actually figured this out, and rather than gatekeep my favorite piece of halo lore, I'll explain. @tarisilmarwen and @thefinaljediknight were both VERY close in guessing that Ezra and Sabine are dressed as Master Chief and Cortana. In fact, that answer is only one letter off.

But I'm getting ahead of myself; lemme backtrack.

The year is 2004. There's still a lot of secrecy surrounding this upcoming video game Halo 2, and a promotional poster of Master Chief has just been released. Developer Frank O'Connor wanted to include this poster in his first weekly update email, but he was unable to. So, instead, he drew his own picture of Master Chief. However, guns are "hard to draw," and he didn't quite look right without eyes or a mouth, so the picture he included ended up looking like this:

He labelled his creation "Mister Chief," and Mister Chief recieved such an overwhelmingly positive response from the fans that he began including a new drawing of Mister Chief in every weekly email after that.

So, yes, those of you who recognized Sabine's Cortana costume was correct! However, the "Ezra Is Master Chief" allegations were off by one letter: Ezra is dressed as Mister Chief.

And for those who want to know more about the phenomenon that is Mister Chief, here's the halopedia article about it.

Sabezra Week, Day 5: Halloween in any time or place!

I wasn't sure what to do for this one, but as soon as I realized I could do something for my beloved sabezra gamergirl au wip, the costumes came to me immediately! Bonus points to anyone who gets what Ezra's outfit is referencing 😁

[gongedtornado]

thinking about this 85 year old customer we had that came in. the cashier said she looked good for her age and she said something along the lines of “Thank you. I’ve got all these wrinkles and I deserve ‘em’!” in the most enthusiastic tone.

she said that she thought skin care and anti-wrinkle products were ridiculous and that our skin is our history of where we’ve been. i cant remember what she said word for word but i know whatever she said brought me comfort.

[kazzykatt]

once again i am not okay because of stick figures (SPOILERS under the cut)

LISTEN

LISTEN THE LAST ONE IS VICTIM I BET MY LIFE ON IT

LOOK AT THE HEAD!!! COMPARED TO THE GLASSES GUY, ITS IRREGULAR!! ITS NOT AS DEFINED!! THATS A THING ALL OF THE ANIMATOR'S STICKS HAVE

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

i wonder if TDL is gonna help later, cuz now that Victim is back he just can't be death

oh my god what if they work together to defeat Victim?

wait is Victim even bad? to the protagonists yes but is he a threat to anyone else? what are your plans little Victim? hhhhhmmmmmmmmm

is it revenge? OH WHAT IF HE WANT REVENGE ON THE ANIMATOR AND IS TRYING TO CONVINCE ALL OF THE OTHER STICKS???😱

TDL would be down to it

TCH... i don't think he'd want to anymore? he was at peace with the animator at the end of the last episode 🤔

Orange wouldn't want to, AND I BET HE'LL TRY TO CONVINCE THEM THAT THE ANIMATOR IS GOOD NOW AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ALSO ALSO, THE GLASSES GUY HAS ANIMATOR POWERS!!!! THAT LASSO TOOL AND THE LINES!!!

the pause is too much, nerf that thing kfhdhffhdjf

another thing that i found cute is that while Orange's powers didnt activate, TCO had a power up 👀 he was shocked and glitched but when he saw Orange getting paused BOOM! POWER UP!

All their powers are fueled by the power of friendship and i love that

[kakimochies]

Crushes? Bad.

[kazoosandfannypacks]

The curtains in my living room were red yesterday. Today they're blue.

Why did the curtains change?

Well, the red curtains matched our couch, the rickety old flannel couch with a pullout bed that was too crusty to use and cushions that were wearing thin.

And then we got a new couch, a blue couch, a couch that used to belong to our grandmother, and when she replaced it she gave it to us. This couch has already seen so much love and will continue to.

And because now our couch is blue.

So are the curtains.

So I just saw a reference to "sometimes the curtains are just blue" again and I have Thoughts.

See, there are various factors at play here

(1) it can be quite frustrating to, in English class or wherever else, feel forced to read some deep meaning into something that you think is honestly not that deep

(2) The author could've chosen not to describe the curtains. There is some reason they did so anyway - maybe this is an author that tends to describe all the scenes, in great detail, so that anytime I new room is present in the story we know the color of the curtains, but, assuming this is not that kind of author - why was this mentioned? What was the author trying to achieve by that.

And

(3) I think sometimes people feel steered towards a certain kind of interpretation, like, "the curtains are a reflection of the characters mental state" or whatever, and it sometimes obscures the fact that sometimes elements in a story have a meaning that's..a little less grand and philosophical.

Maybe the author is trying to establish a specific vibe of the room, for example. Like that something in a story doesn't have a grand philosophical meaning that the author intended doesn't mean they intended it to have *no* meaning. Maybe the meaning is just a bit more simple.