#kazha'a anhsari

[koujaaku]

Haven't posted much art lately because I dove headfirst into FFXIV to play a gay catboy with @hithren... presenting my Takoda Hawkfeather being positively smitten with Hithren's Kazha'a Anhsari 🥰

[hithren]

OC-tober 2021 Day 10: Suit

List by @locke-rinannis

I could have done Josie in her classic suit, that would have been easy. But I decided to go an entirely different route. 

I also spent way too much time on this one. And I keep changing my inking styles.

[a-memory-of]

The trip home was quiet for the most part. Savir Anhsari made casual conversation, but seemed mostly keen to let her brother rest. When the endless trees gave way to more familiar roads and clearings, she quietly cleared her throat. "Mister Laurens? I know... I've probably said it before but I'll never really be able to say it enough." Savir paused, slowing the chocobo so she could turn back to face him. "Thank you. He couldn't have... done this without you. So... thank you for taking the chance on us."

"I'm glad to have been able to help," Laurens Lalier answered. "I didn't really do much, I'll be honest, but whatever help I was able to give I'm grateful to have had the chance. You both deserve to be happy and healthy and not live in constant fear." He couldn't even fathom what their lives had been like for so long. They'd been through things he'd never understand from his place of privilege.

Savir shook her head again, "You did a lot more than you think. My brother... had a reason, many reasons, to fight, but he never really had one to live." Her smile was enough to say what she meant without words. She reached up and patted the bird's shoulder. Then she reached up to hand Laurens the reins. "Do you know the way from here?"

Laurens knew what she meant; he just wasn't sure how to answer. Thankfully she gave him a way out, letting him simply nod his response before turning his attention to the forest around them to properly answer her question. The trees were familiar. The road under the chocobo's feet was solid and lead where he wanted to go. "Yes, I think I'll be alright. Why don't you take him with you?" He offered, indicating the chocobo. "I can take your Zha from here, I think, and that way you don't have to worry about anything."

"Oh..." Savir blinked up at him, tilting her head, "Are you sure?" Laurens seemed sure enough, so she guided the bird to lower itself just as before. She helped hoist off his bag, and make sure he had a good grip on both before offering him a smile.

"Be safe, okay? Tell Zha I'll come and visit you both once you've had some time to recover," the little Miqo'te gave him a quick, gentle hug around Kazha'a and his bag.

Laurens adjusted the bag while trying to keep a good hold on Kazha'a - a trickier prospect than he'd anticipated, but not impossible. Unable to hug Savir back properly, he leaned his head against hers and smiled. "I'll let him know," he promised. "He'll probably like to hear that. He loves you very, very much afterall." Kazha'a might not appreciate Laurens speaking for him, but it was still factual. "Take care, Savir. I look forward to seeing you soon."

Stepping back, Laurens nodded to Savir and then started walking in the direction of his home. When they'd set out only a day before, he hadn't known what to expect. But a large, scared part of him hadn't dared think this would be how he'd return home - bringing an injured, exhausted, but alive Kazha'a back with him.

Savir smiled, and gave a quiet, knowing giggle before hopping up on the chocobo. With one last wave, and a lingering look at her brother, she urged the bird back into the trees and soon disappeared from sight completely.

____________________________

With @ffxivaltstars

Kazha'a barely stirred the entire time, he had winced and groaned a few times as he was shifted around. But that was to be expected, really, with stitches and wounds scattered about as they were. He seemed aware enough, at the least, to not fight against the hold. He seemed to know who it was.

It was further than Laurens had quite realized, but he kept his complaints to himself. There was nothing to be done for it except to keep moving; he wasn't about to set Kazha'a down, afterall. But by the time the exterior light of his home came into view, he was more than ready to relieve his aching arms and back. Even a Miqo'te as slight as Kazha'a was an awful lot for someone whose most extensive workout was a walk along the creek, or carrying a parcel of books or groceries into the house.

Fumbling with his keys was awkward. Eventually Laurens had to let his bag down to give himself a slightly larger range of motion, then contort himself to get the house key from his pocket and manage the handle. With the house finally open to them, he carefully retrieved the bag and headed in. The lamps were unlit but he knew the layout of his home without needing them.

Rather than depositing Kazha'a on the nearest piece of available furniture, Laurens brought him all the way to the bedroom before setting him down as gently as possible on the mattress. His arms shook with relief of being divested of their burden, but it was worth it. He was actually rather proud of himself for managing it. "Welcome home," he said quietly, and leaned down to kiss Kazha'a's forehead.

Kazha'a was unaware of poor Laurens' struggle for most of the trip. But as he was shifted around again at the door and finally laid down in bed, he blearily opened his eyes. The wince and slight groan was a likely signal the pain medicine had warn off some time ago from the previous night.

The room was dark, but the Keeper's sensitive night vision brought him the sight of a familiar wooden ceiling. And with a touch to his head, an even more familiar voice. Kazha'a turned slightly, looking up to Laurens. The last he had remembered was being in the tent, talking with his sister. Had he really slept the entire way back?

"We're... back?" the question seemed a little foolish. But maybe he had been dreaming. The way his body ached was certainly real though.

Laurens hadn't been certain of just how fully asleep Kazha'a had been through the trip. He'd hoped for the Miqo'te to sleep through the majority of it, if only to prevent more aches and pains from the awkwardness of travel. The first words from Kazha'a's mouth were a relief. "We're back," Laurens confirmed quietly. "We had an escort most of the way, but it's just you and me here. How are you feeling?" The lights weren't lit, only filtered moonlight from the window shedding any kind of illumination. They both were genetically adapted to low light, however, so leaving Kazha'a's side to fuss with lamps was unnecessary for now.

Kazha'a took the moment to look around, eyes fully adjusted to the darkness. They were indeed in the familiar bedroom of the familiar cabin. His eyes caught the moonlight, flashing at certain angles before he settled on Laurens' face. His brow furrowed a bit at the mention of an escort, but let it be.

"I'm fine," was the still-ingrained first response. But after a pause, Kazha'a sighed, "Side hurts. And my shoulder."

"We'll get you cleaned up and change the dressings tomorrow," Laurens promised. "For now though I can give you something for the pain." He was significantly more comfortable back in his own home rather than in an unfamiliar tent, and that relaxation showed. Laurens left Kazha'a's side without fussing, going to his cabinet of medicines to select the appropriate one for the job. Something that acted quickly, combined with something that would release more slowly to allow Kazha'a to sleep through the night. He mixed them into a glass and added water from the pitcher. This he finally brought back to the injured Miqo'te.

"It won't taste very nice, but I promise it will make you feel better," Laurens said, mildly apologetic. But after the poisons he'd seen Kazha'a willingly ingest, he knew the medicine wouldn't be nearly as bad.

The Keeper gave a subtle nod of his head. He watched Laurens go, eyes hovering over his back in the darkness as he mixed the medicine. For as stubborn as he was, he was being surprisingly complicit and had made no move to leave where he had been laid.

Something in Kazha'a's entire demeanor was different. One might first equate it to being tired and injured, in pain. But Kazha'a had been hurt in Laurens' company many times before and just as many times he had been irritable and combative. Yet now, the miqo'te was relaxed. At ease.

He shook his head in response to the comment about the taste. It was true, he had worse. Far worse. He reached for the glass, balancing himself on his other arm with a wince. And he downed the medicine without complaint.

Kazha'a had been through a lot. There would be plenty of time to talk about it - as much as Kazha'a would talk about it - later. The way Laurens treated him did not change, except perhaps for the increased closeness. He didn't try to coddle Kazha'a. He did try to help where he could, though.

Taking the glass back, Laurens set it down on the side table and climbed back up onto the bed. "Just let me know if there's anything you need or want." He reached out to push the blond forelock out of Kazha'a's face, watching the flare of green as the Miqo'te's eyes caught the light just right again. "Otherwise, the best thing I can advise is just to sleep as much as you can stand."

The bitter taste of the medicine faded quickly enough, and Kazha'a eased himself back down to the bed. He shifted to his back with a wince but it eventually took the weight off his injured side. His head turned, just slightly, watching Laurens move onto the bed beside him.

"Mm," he agreed in a low hum, barely with any voice behind the breath. It felt as if he had been sleeping for days as it was. But he knew the other was right. His lids drooped, but he fought against it for a few moments. He eventually started to lose the fight, whether aided by the medicine or not.

[ffxivaltstars]

🤝 19, for Laurens

fifty reasons to touch someone

On a body covered with scars, there were still a few that stood out. The pale lines were barely visible in some places, the skin they adorned already pale to begin with. Laurens splayed his fingers over the worst one, covering the center of the large star burst shape, and just felt the gentle rise and fall as Kazha’a breathed.

He could feel the shift when the sleeping miqo’te woke. Even with Kazha’a facing away from him, the change in the way he breathed gave him away. Laurens nuzzled the join between Kazha’a’s neck and shoulder to lightly press his lips there. “Good morning,” he murmured. “Did you sleep well?”

[hithren]

OC-tober 2021 Day 8: Promise List by @locke-rinannis

“I’ll come back for you.”

[hithren]

FFXIVWrite Prompt 8: Adroit

Adroit Adjective; clever or skillful in using the hands or mind Character(s): Kazha’a Anhsari, ft. Laurens Lalier @ffxivaltstars _________________________ His hands had never been gentle things. He had calluses formed far before he came of age. They were scarred. They were rough. And while they were skilled at many things, being gentle was something they lacked in experience.

When Kazha’a was young, he had held his baby sister with shaking, unsure hands. He had been scolded for clinging too tight. He never felt comfortable supporting her head. Even at that age, his hands fit better around a knife than they did in hers.

He could hunt. That was something he had done for so long it was like breathing. He knew how to draw back a bow. Where and how to make clean kills. His hands could work the skin from the body to be formed into leather. He could cut and drain the blood, pack and cook the meat.

Kazha’a could kill. That was probably the one thing he was best at. His hands had slit the throats of many. For coin. To survive. Because he wanted to. Sometimes he felt he could still see it, the crimson stain upon his fingers. Sometimes he felt he could still feel the warmth of the blood settling in the cracks of his skin.

The motion of a blade against a whetstone was a familiar one. His hands had long since memorized the flow. He knew how to fasten his armor by heart. Each buckle and leather strap were part of a well-practiced routine that he had carried with him.

But the removal of the armor, that was something less practiced, less known. The feeling of a book between his fingers, not the hilt of a blade. Kazha’a knew the heat of a campfire more than he knew his way around a kitchen. 

The weight of a key, to a home, a home, felt far more heavy than his knives ever did.

His hands still stiffened when Laurens reached for them. That was also an unfamiliar weight. He could hunt, he could kill, but to simply hold… that was unknown. He had no skill in this. He did not know how to be gentle.

Kazha’a was once again that young boy who clung too hard to his little sister. He was the man whose hands shook after they had driven a blade through his mother’s neck. His hands were rough. His hands were stained.

But perhaps this, too, was a skill he would be good at in time. It was one he did not mind learning.

[hithren]

MiqoMarch Day 1: Selfie

Screenshot challenges, meme things… I don’t tend to do them cause I don’t mod or do fancy poses with that magic tool, so I feel my screenshots will always be sub-par. But, heh might as well try and do some of these.

[hithren]

📀 How easy is it to shock your OC? To confuse them? To lie to them, to manipulate them? How are they with feelings of trust? Can your OC be trusted? (For Kazha'a!)

It is rather hard to surprise Kazha'a. Living the life he has, he has seen many different sides of people (usually bad). Cruelty, violence, and things just plain going wrong? Yeah, he's seen it. However, on the contrary, show him genuine care and affection, and he's not quite sure what to do with it. That is something that confuses him.

Again, living the hard life he has, Kazha'a doesn't trust easy. More accurately, doesn't trust at all. It is hard to manipulate or lie to him, as he's already expecting the person to. He follows his instincts about people, and it's gotten him this far.

Kazha'a likely comes off as someone who cannot be trusted. Trust is something he does not give freely, and it is often hard to give trust to someone who refuses to give it in return. However, if Kazha'a is anything, he's honest. It is pretty easy to know where people stand with him.

[hithren]

Inspiration and art in general are still real hard, so have some vaguely shippy scribbles I did for ockiss week/valentine’s that I’ll likely never finish but

featuring @locke-rinannis‘s Emerlain and Ruran and @ffxivaltstars’s Laurens

[hithren]

MiqoMarch Day 2: Job/Class

technically Kaz is a NIN, but I hate playing it and I’ll never forgive SE for taking away ROG

Let me be an assassin SE, not this ninja garbo :clap:

[hithren]

Day I: First OC Using the OCtober2020 list by @thepeachjane _____________________________________

I didn’t know if I was going to attempt a drawing challenge this year with how bad I’ve been, hence why it’s so late. ( It’s still October 1st for me, though, so I’m not technically late. ) I have commissions to do still, but this is the first time I’ve drawn in like... months. So I’mma attempt, bro. Since I’m sticking with FFXIV characters, Kaz is technically the first one I ever made when I got the game, and the first I started to RP. He was also based on a very, very old OC, which I think I spoke about at one point. An iteration of my grumpy boy has followed me for a very long time. So he may as well be considered one of my first.

[hithren]

Day 3: Favorite OC(s) Using the OCtober2020 list by thepeachjane  __________________________________

Something a little less refined and sketchy today, spent a good portion of the day at the doctor’s and I’m just happy to finish something.

It’s really hard for me to pick a favorite of all my characters. I love them all pretty equally. However, these three will always have a special place. Ellere and Kaz have been with me a really long time, and Arshtat wormed her way into my heart pretty easily and I love how far she’s come.

[hithren]

I don’t even like playing NIN anymore, but this coat is *chef’s kiss*

[hithren]

Happy Valentione’s, 2020 Starring Kazha’a and Laurens (@ffxivaltstars)

[hithren]

daily doodle

sometimes you just want to draw your idiot son with a scruffy ponytail

even if you may be the only one to appreciate it

[a-memory-of]

"As for the matter of leadership, it has been placed upon me," Oba quietly said. "Unless you seek to disagree, boy. There are those here that remember I held the title long ago. Before my daughter. And before your mother. I have arranged birds. When the moon is high, your sister can escort you back."

When Savir released his hand, Laurens Lalier slid it back around Kazha'a. "Do you need to check him for anything, Oba? Any lingering effects, or something I should watch for...?" He couldn't speak to the clan's actions, or Kazha'a's feelings on the subject. All he could do was his best to care for Kazha'a and help him heal and get his strength back.

"Had there been lingering effects, he likely would have been dead," she huffed in amusement, but shifted closer to Kazha'a. Leaning over, she peeled back some bandages around the wound to his side, much to the protest of Kazha'a himself. "The wound was deep. But I see no issue should he rest. You seem a capable healer. And perhaps more capable than I to urge him upon his back."

Savir Anhsari seemed relieved, especially knowing she could help the two of them home. Perking slightly, she made a soft sound, "You two are probably hungry! I-I'll fetch you something to eat." She was already half to her feet and out the tent by the time she finished her sentence. Oba merely shook her head.

Kazha'a Anhsari had relaxed, as much as he could. He quite honestly had not expected things to go as well as they had. If the clan was so ready for change, he couldn't understand why they had allowed his mother to remain in power so long. But it was done.

Change could only come for the better, based on what Laurens had heard from Kazha'a. He colored slightly at Oba's comments but held his tongue in check, at least for the moment. Perhaps some of his questions were a little daft, yes, but his concern overrode his usually strong good sense. If Oba wasn't worried, he had no reason to be, either. At least that was what he tried to tell himself.

And the clan hadn't tried to kill him or Kazha'a on the spot. That was a big deal, too. Kazha'a had paved the way for change; removed a big hurdle that had refused to let things go any way but her own. There was a lot that would likely be happening for the whole clan over the next few moons.

"I don't think anyone can keep him down for longer than he wants to be," Laurens admitted and kissed the top of Kazha'a's head between his ears. "Hopefully we can simply work out some kind of deal that allows for only very light activity for a short while." Though he was speaking to Oba, the words were still directed to Kazha'a as well.

Kazha'a blew a breath out his nose, ears lowering on habit to the kiss to his head. Despite how comfortable he seemed to be in Laurens' arms, he did show a bit of a familiar scowl at being talked about. He gave a half-hearted growl under his breath, cheeks coloring as well, "I'm not an idiot."

Oba rolled her eyes, but there was something fond about her face as she looked to him, and to Laurens. Kazha'a caught her eye for a moment, and had to look away just as fast. "You must possess the patience of the Twelve," Oba spoke as she pushed herself to her feet again, leaning on her staff. Her words were, of course, directed at Laurens. "I will see you both off later. There is much to be done meantime."

The Keeper woman turned back out the tent, leaving the two mean alone again. Kazha'a shifted himself, turning slightly in the hold, and thee was a hint of a pout in his muttered words, "...Am I really that bad?"

At first Laurens tensed, not wanting to let Kazha'a move and potentially re-open the wounds they'd tried so hard to close. But the movement was slight, and Laurens relented albeit reluctantly. "You're a very active individual," he said after a moment's thought. "You don't seem to like sitting still unless it's your decision, and from my observations..." Laurens paused, stroking back Kazha'a's hair.

"You are someone who prefers to be in full control of himself. My concern is that you will try to overcompensate to prove that you're just as capable as always, and that will cause you to be hurt further than you already are." He sighed into Kazha'a's hair. "Perhaps I'm something of a mother hen. I'm sorry."

Kazha'a drew in a deep breath, but seemed satisfied that he could lay the side of his head against Laurens' chest and listen with one ear the steady drum of his heartbeat. He didn't seek to move any further. "It's... fine. I'm not used to people worrying about me..."

"I'm not going to do anything stupid. Before I..." Kazha'a frowned. "I couldn't afford to stay still for long. It's not something... I'm going to be used to." There was a long pause, and Kazha'a remained silent. Slowly, he drew in another breath, "...I... I want to go home."

__________________________________

With @ffxivaltstars

"We'll go home," Laurens agreed, his heart flipping at the use of the word, particularly coming from Kazha'a's lips. "Once they tell us we can go, we will go." He went silent for a long moment, his arms loosely around Kazha'a just to keep him steady. And, selfishly, to keep him close. "I wonder if Savir would like to come visit us from time to time."

Kazha'a quieted again, thinking. Meetings with his sister had been so few and far between over the passed several years, he never considered it could be different. To have a place he felt safe enough to bring her, to have a place she could visit without fear of being followed... it was all new.

"I want... her to do what she wants, do everything she couldn't," he admitted softly. "She... the world hasn't ruined her yet. Not like me. She can be better." Kazha'a took a breath in and went quiet again.

Laurens couldn't help himself. He knew full well that Kazha'a wouldn't accept the words, but Laurens still insisted, "You are many things, but ruined is not a word I would use." There was much to be done, Oba had said, but Laurens didn't have much to do. They hadn't arrived with many things, after all. It left him somewhat at loose ends. "Savir seems like a young woman who will do whatever she sets her mind to. If she has a mind to leave here and see the world, or something of that nature, all the better that she knows where she always has people she can depend on. Family. Friends."

He quieted again. Kazha'a held himself in little regard, that had always been apparent. He had a stubborn will to survive, but it was not for himself. He survived for others. He had accepted he was a ruined, broken thing a long time ago. Kazha'a never thought much of the future, lingering in the present and weighed down by the past.

The thought of his sister leaving somewhere made him stiffen. He knew the world. The world was dangerous. "You... think she'll leave?"

Shifting a little, Laurens gave the question some thought. "I think there's a strong case for it. For starters, she's never had the actual opportunity to do so, and even just knowing it's possible is enough for some people to at least do something a little bit. I don't know if she'd travel very far or not, but you know your sister considerably better than I." He leaned slightly over Kazha'a's shoulder, gently letting his chin rest there for a moment. "Do you think that she will seize this opportunity to explore the world?"

In that moment, Kazha'a found he really did not know his sister at all. He had no idea if his sister wanted to leave or not. She, like him, had often spoke of the woods being home, and yet... he had freedom she did not have. But he shook his head slightly, hair brushing against the side of Laurens' face as he rested on his shoulder. "I don't want her to, it's too dan--"

As if on cue, Savir parted back the tent opening and stepped inside. She had three bowls of something, two set in the crook of one arm and the other in her opposite hand. Blinking, she looked to the two of them and cleared her throat, "Sorry, I um... brought some stew? It's not much, but Oba said you shouldn't overdo it, Zha." The little Keeper set herself beside the two of them, holding a bowl out for each as she set hers aside.

"Stew sounds wonderful," Laurens replied. He didn't immediately change his position, lingering at Kazha'a's shoulder until finally straightening up in order to accept the bowl from Savir. Until the warm aroma hit his nose he hadn't spared much thought for being hungry. Now he found his stomach growling. He needed both hands to eat, so moved to sit against Kazha'a's side instead of wrapped around his back.

"Thank you for this. You keep being made to fetch and carry things for us." Laurens smiled apologetically. "I'm sure there are plenty of things you'd rather be doing."

Savir only shook her head, quietly laughing as she settled nearby with her stew. "I don't think I've ever gotten to see him for this long," she looked down, "I mean... I wish it wasn't for... the reason it was but, all that will be different now, right...?"

Kazha'a still leaned heavily against Laurens despite the change in position. Thanks to the wound in his side, he likely wouldn't be sitting up completely on his own for a few days. He looked down at the bowl for a long moment, listening to his sister. There would always be a heavy guilt he carried knowing how it had been.

Savir took a sip of stew, letting the silence linger a bit before she looked back up at the two of them. With a curious tilt of the head, she cleared her throat, "So... how long h-have you and my brother been... I mean, how long have you been in love?"

The male Keeper had been struggling to find out how best to lift the bowl, and he nearly dropped it. Thankfully, nothing had made it in his mouth yet, or he likely would have choked on the sound he made.