#k-p-p-d

[housewifekiki]

Blogtress, I’m watching Frasier from the beginning all over again and wow, queen Demeris had Niles almost as well-trained as Kiki has Harvey. They should really hold a masterclass.

—Lily, who hopes you and all the Monstre-Xaviers are doing well🥰

*blows dust off* HOUSEWIFEKIKI AND THE BLOGTRESS ARE BACK!!! although I've literally thought about this blog every day and I am so so happy to be back, I promise not to leave like that anymore. Any time is going to get announced

But I have been doing well. Been working for the most part and staying in. Fully vaxxed and hoping cases go down again. No big news to report. Just been chugging along

AND YES MARIS WAS THE OG GIRLBOSS GATEKEEP GASLIGHT QUEEN. (Kiki and Harvey obvi have a much healthier relationship) BUT YOU CANNOT TELL ME THAT MARIS DID NOT PAVE THE WAY FOR SO MANY OTHERS.

As for the Monstre-Xaviers, this is what they have been up to since the last post on this blog of March 2021:

Harvey: got offered the department head position but turned it down because he prfers being a regular professor and geniunely enjoys teaching. his grad students still keep crying randomly. is running out of a desk space to keep pictures of his family because they're so big now. next family reunion he will stuff everyone into the same picture to avoid the hassle. is teaching more courses than ever so he can be kind of hard to spot.

Kiki: has taken upon herself to occasionally do the after school runs for Micah and Timmy to keep up her crown- her kids might be too old for school but she will make sure her grandchildren know their grandma is a G. Still has zero grey hairs or wrinkles. got invited to play in an Among Us livestream and shocked everyone by a)being the best imposter there ever was and b) proving to them that she wasn't a catfish and was indeed a housewife granny in suburban Massachusetts

Wes: Still on the farm, has no plans to leave the farm. Still producing pop-folk bangers; his name may or may not be listed somewhere in Miss Swift's Folklore album production credits. Summer and him are currently excepting their second baby, a girl that is going to be named Thursday, and is due in late October.

Micah: Is working on his Ph.D at Harvard (his thesis is on perceptions of the common class by upper and noble classes through the lens of literature) and enjoys seeing his dad at lunch time. They make sure to eat together if they get a chance (Micah eats the lunch Timmy packed for him and Harvey eats the lunch Kiki packed for him) and talk about how their grading is going. He prides himself on being the hot new DILF on the block even if his kids aren't babies anymore.

Harlan: Briana Joo and him are newly engaged. He bought her an engagement ring after seeing a Twitter thread appreciating the buff chick with the paint chips on the show my mom is watching (Briana Joo was indeed that buff chick with the paint chips) and proposed to her right on (streaming) television and even got a Chip and Johanna Gaines congratulations on their streaming service Instagram page. His first poetry collection got published and was a commercial but not critical success (exactly like he wanted)

Joss: Working at the hospital to this day and now has the fastest typing speed of any of the adminstrative employees. Is no longer working the front desk/customer service gig and is now a proper admisntrive employee in the cubicle space of the hospital eye and ear building. His sugar mama is now officially his girlfriend because she is as emotionally attatched to Joss as he is to her.

Daniel: Still dating Armanda and still wearing black nail polish. Has gotten very lowkey into the Pokemon card craze but is mostly replaying Fire Emblem: Three Houses and trying to convince people it was underrated for all the hype it got as the big Switch game. he romanced Dorothea.

- The Blogtress

[omurizer-draws-things]

Hi. We love your fan art. Sorry we're stalking your account right now. Do you have a store because I need a new phone case! 😂😂😂

hey~ you can get phonecases on my society6 as long as i still have it opened ^^

[housewifekiki]

The Turners having a very real dispute about their weird child’s safety just hit my heart real hard. Cesar & Ray having real moments got my heart weak too. JASMINE CALLING JAMAL POOR TO HIS FACE GOT ME HOLLERING. But not these entitled assholes they the help! RUBEN DID NOT JUST SAY THAT. HE DID NOT. Jasmine being a real one THRU & THRU. She deserves SO MUCH. Monse & Brian having a heart to heart hurts. NOT OSCAR’S VOICE BREAKING!!!! FUCK I GOTTA GO!!!!! —L, who iS EMOTIONALLY COMPROMISED

SIS THE TURNERS HAVE BEEN THE BEST PART OF THIS SEASON AND THE LAST SEASON!!!! THEY DO NOTHING BUT LOVE THEIR WEIRD CHILD AND HIS WEIRD FRIENDS AND SUPPORT THE COMMUNITY. 

RUBEN WAS ON SOMETHING THAT EPISODE AND I GET IT BUT I ALSO DON’T GET IT. 

GIVE OSCAR AN OSCAR 2020!!!

(also you and Oscar still in the wrong because look at this; yes it’s easier to kill a zombie than a ghost but if you get a ghost right, you can still remove the ghost without causing damage to the person that has gotten the ghost. If you get bit by a zombie, that’s it. You’re done for. iZombie and Warm Bodies were both very good pieces of media but you know what got even more popular than both of them combined? The Walking Dead and no one be liking the zombies from The Walking Dead like that!!!) 

-The Blogtress

[housewifekiki]

Harvey!! Blogtress!!! Netflix just announced On My Block premieres on March 29th!!!!! —Lily

BLACK AND LATINX PEOPLE CUDDLING UP TO NETFLIX WHEN THEY FINALLY CAME THRU:

THEY TOOK THEIR SWEET TIME BUT I DON’T CARE BECAUSE MI VATO SPOOKY IS COMING BACK TO ME. IT REALLY FEEL LIKE HE WENT OUT TO BUY CIGARETTES AND I TOLD HIM TO GET ME SOME TAKIS AND PASSIONFRUIT JUICE AND HE ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH EVERYTHING!! AND I’M LETTING HIM BACK IN THE HOUSE SEM PERGUNTAS PORQUE ISSO É AMOR. 

-The Blogtress

Netflix is a malevolent being but I still pay even with the increases porque yo soy un estúpido. All I want is that if Little Miss Frito Pie is still hanging around but not Ruby, I’m suing Netflix for emotional distress. I work at Harvard there has to be a Nobel Prize winner that can read Netflix to filth. 

Don’t think I forgot about The Get Down. 

-Harvey