#just yapping abt what's been on my mind
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moyazaika · 18 hours ago
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will you appear again before Christmas?🥲
YES HI!!!! WOWEE sorry for being away longer than i intended! estranged family member showed up on my front door after 18 yeARS of no contact?!?!? went to bali and lost my pasSPORT?!?!?! failed my driver's TEST!?!?!?!
#life
#i've been writing a lot!#so i will post something soon#i missed u all and thank you to the people who checked in with me#it meant so much more than you know :') <3#tumblr has become such a creative outlet for me and retreat for me overtime but i didn't realise how comfortable i got here till now#taking time away has also cemented my own writing style#for a while i was trying too hard to force/fit into what i saw was popular in the yandere niche (art under capitalism xyz competition xyz)#now i've fully embraced what i can write#like to write#and want to be known for writing#so yes it's been an interesting end to an otherwise hellish year. honour roll second yr in a row so it all feels worth it now but jfc#i've never crashed out so much before in one year#so yeah! if u read all that ur a legend#just yapping abt what's been on my mind#consciously reading has also challenged me with how i want to extend my own writing#as if i wasn't ambitious enough bye#but i really hope that 2025 is#above all else#the year of unbroken promises#i don't want to promise things i can't deliver#but i still want you guys to be excited for what i do put out!!#so lesson learned; do not make a series masterlist/seasonal event if all the chapters or stories aren't pre-written out alr :')#2025 writing goals just bcuz i saw people do this with their reading so why not with writing?#1) begin and finish a multi part series (more than 5 chapters! i live for the longform)#2) clear out my inbox fully. i'm at 40ish asks so this isn't too crazy of a goal imo#i'll c ya guys soon tho! thanks for sticking around <3<3<3 love u all#excited for what's next :)
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dizzybizz · 4 months ago
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some doodles
#i meant to put the balor one in the previous post but i forgor 😭its in a diff file from the sketch dump i was coloring in so it just didnt#exist in my mind at all. i felt like smth was missing as i was posting it but i couldnt place what hlep#adeline and eiland have been driving me insane lately. expect more of them. probably.#dont minf the last two guys. some concepts for future farms 😋 (pls mind them im crazy abt all my farmers even if they technically dont -#exist yet. pls ask abt them or smth pls im nroaml i can be nroma l i prommy)#fields of mistria#fom balor#sona#im gonna start tagging that i think.#fom eiland#fom adeline#fom elsie#fom farmer#my art#guys can i just say that im so happy that balor is silver n not gold cus otherwise i would have to confront a part of me im not proud of#we shouldnt talk abt it but like yeah jjust know i like his silver and his whole deal#have such a softspot n bias for characters who dont settle anywhere. who never lay down their roots or whatever. who keep their past secret#like oughh hes hitting so many marks#i like hawthorne a lot. hes more developed in my head. and also i like his dead look and hair bows. i have so many ideas abt him man it hur#i promised myself i wouldnt make a new save file til i reached y2 w rory but apperantly errols bday is cursed bc the game has frozen twice#sorry if you read all of these tags. go to my askbox w fom stuff or smth. ask abt my farmers plsplspls pl s jk haha unless. maybe even#gimme drawing reqs for fom in general. ok tyvm ly sorry for yapping. its what i do best
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puppyeared · 6 months ago
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sorry if your no longer interested in lego monkie kid, but any thoughts on the new season?
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theres a new season
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brainrot-stitch · 7 months ago
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Oh btw. Here's the silly billy
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:3
size comparison under the cut
!!!
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I'm like 5'6 I think and the guy in the size comparison is me so someone taller would be a bit taller than that I think
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nightsprung · 5 months ago
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as fiercely independent as jordan is, she's also extremely domestic in the sense that she's a giver and she likes to take care of her partner, their space, etc. one of her biggest love languages is acts of service and the most obvious way this manifests in her relationships is cooking for someone she cares about. she'll make meals and desserts from scratch, while things are in the oven she's cleaning up around the house with motown music playing and more than likely singing along at half volume.
the duality of this is that she also learned several home improvement tricks from her father and can replace flooring, refinish wood, build furniture, do basic fixes to plumbing/appliances, etc. she likes being able to take care of herself but in that same capacity, take care of the people around her.
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benefactordreams · 8 months ago
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helloo you mentioned that jackles has a bug power, but what exactly is this power? is it manipulation of any bugs or like bug-like characteristics or something else? trying to consider more factors to think about what is a good opposing power to have :D
ok trying to remember what I typed up in my notes a while back — he has this belt loosely fitted on his waist that has bugs in resin tied(?) on it and when he throws them to the ground, they break and the bug in said resin comes out and fights for him (he fights too obviously but his big help).
The power that's used is based on the bug. I think I for examples I said bees are like poison, spiders can slow the enemy with webs (or was this one poison??) but I can't remember exactly what I put. I remember mentioning more bugs like centepeeds (is that how you spell it?) but these are the two I remember fully (and idk if bees were poison so 💀💀)
He does have to make the bugs in resin himself and that's the downside bc he might have to leave battle bc of lack of bugs if it's too much but I hope I explained this well and answered your question caz 🙏🙏
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muniimyg · 1 month ago
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♡ 01: maybe it's all in my head
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series m.list // taglist
note: hihiii ,, this jk has been rotting my mind for a while now ... time to ruin urs !!! enj the tension ,, (i miss being toxic) lmk what u guys think of their dynamic tho <3 excited to share their little story with u ,, mwaaaa
warnings: oc and jk are mean in this fic !!! pls don't comment being whiney abt it :') !!! oc overhears jk fucking someone ,, jealousy ,, banter
//
“oh. it’s you.”
leaning against the doorframe, jungkook looks at you half disgusted and half disappointed. his arms are crossed with one eyebrow lifted. he blocks your entrance.
“now, now,” you reach over and ruffle his hair. he shifts, dodging your touch. “don’t be so excited. i know your boring life just waits for my presence—oh. i get it. were you expecting someone? usually you’re thrilled to see me.”
jungkook’s expression doesn’t shift, though there’s a faint glint in his eyes. 
“thrilled is reaching, don’t you think?”
“is it?”
“yeah.”
you roll your eyes, brushing past him with a teasing smile. 
“right, so… which are you today? mr. save the dolphins or professor chem?”
jungkook scoffs at you.
“at least my marine conservation interest and organic chem major help the world. what’s your major again? yap-conomics or bitch-ology?”
“help the world?” you almost burst into laughter. “god, you are such a nerd.”
“nerd? i don’t know about you, but some of us care about—”
“yeah, yeah,” you wave him off. “are you waiting for a nobel peace prize or something? holy shit, jungkook. learn to relax a little. you’re so serious. it’s cute, really… but only when you aren’t so anal about it.”
cute?
jungkook feels his chest tighten.
before he can make a comeback, taehyung calls you to the living room.
“___? is that you? stop trying to edge jungkook! get in here! i need your data for our paper!” 
you stick your tongue out at jungkook before turning away and rushing to the living room. your lips curl into a smug grin as you saunter off, leaving jungkook muttering something under his breath. you catch him rolling his eyes just before you disappear around the corner, a small flicker of triumph igniting in your chest.
the living room is warm, filled with the faint hum of taehyung’s lo-fi playlist and the smell of old books—his aesthetic, no doubt. taehyung is sprawled on the couch, laptop open, an arm draped lazily over the cushions. his wide grin grows wider when he sees you. 
“i’m here!”
“finally! come on, genius. enlighten me,” he says, patting the seat next to him.
you plop down beside him, legs folded under you, your laptop balanced precariously on your knees. “genius? are you sucking up to me because you didn’t do your part of the project yet?”
“yup,” he says, shrugging, his head tilted lazily to the side. “if you don’t send me that data tonight, though, i might call you something less flattering.”
you laugh, the sound soft and light, and lean into the cushions, already pulling up the necessary files. 
“your boyfriend’s in a mood.”
“he always is when you’re around,” taehyung teases. “he only answered the door cos he thought it was his student. your face must’ve pissed him off.”
chuckling at his response, you ask another question. 
“where are the guys?”
“they’ll be home soon,” taehyung answers. “said they wanna eat out tonight after jungkook’s tutoring session. you coming with?”
“sure,” you agree. 
then, the two of you fall into a comfortable rhythm, bouncing ideas back and forth while taehyung clicks through your notes, occasionally throwing in a sarcastic remark or two that makes you nudge him with your elbow.
a few minutes later, you hear an unfamiliar laugh and footsteps approaching.
jungkook strides in, casual and confident as always, but this time a girl is trailing after him. 
she’s pretty. 
the two exchange a few murmured words before jungkook’s eyes flicker briefly in your direction. he raises a hand in a lazy acknowledgment, the girl following suit, and say hi. taehyung nods at them and then they’re gone—slipping upstairs in the blink of an eye. 
the sound of his bedroom door clicking shut echoes faintly.
and then, it rings in your ear. 
you blink, your fingers frozen mid-typing on the keyboard. something gnaws at your chest, sharp and unfamiliar, leaving a bitter taste at the back of your throat. taehyung, oblivious, scrolls through your notes, muttering about formatting errors.
but you… you’re somewhere else entirely. 
what was that?
no name?
no introduction?
did she think you were taehyung's girlfriend or something? that jungkook was all for her?
oh god.
there's a weird twist in your stomach. it feels like a prickle of irritation spreading across your skin like an itch you can’t scratch… you shake your head, trying to brush it off, but the image of jungkook—smirking as usual, leaning casually against the banister, that girl so effortlessly fitting into the space beside him—lingers, stubborn and unshakable…
what the fuck.
it’s not like you and jungkook are close. 
you’re frenemies, at best. 
unsure of when it started exactly—but it’s been happening long enough for it to be routine and well-known in the friendgroup. you two are the kind of people who throw jabs at each other during game nights and compete to see who can make the snarkiest comment without crossing the line. you’re always caught in this stupid cycle of one-upping each other, all for the entertainment of the group. sometimes, more for yourself. life gets boring pretty quickly, and jungkook is your fastest source of entertainment. 
yet, why does it feel like you’ve just lost some unspoken game?
your chest tightens, and you lower your gaze to your laptop, fingers hovering over the keys. you bite the inside of your cheek, a nervous habit you’ve never been able to kick… this icky feeling begins to take over and your mind races with reasons as to why.
maybe it’s because jungkook’s always been so good at getting under your skin. 
maybe it’s because, for all his teasing and relentless bickering, there’s this… comfort in knowing that he’s always there, right across the table, firing back at you like he knows exactly how to push your buttons.
and maybe that’s the problem.
because now, with someone else upstairs, laughing at something he probably said, you’re starting to realize that you might actually care more than you thought.
maybe you care because you’re not the one in his room he’s trying to make laugh.
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after a few hours pass, everyone’s stomach beings to grumble. 
for the past 20 minutes, the guys have been begging you to go up and call jungkook down. he hasn’t been answering their texts and all argue that if they go up and knock; he’ll just ignore them. 
… but if you do it…
he’ll answer.
even if it’s just to insult you. 
you glance up at the clock, already mentally calculating the time. you're not really in the mood for another round of back-and-forth with him, but you know they'll just keep pushing you.
"please, please, please, ___!” taehyung cries, pouting. “i really need pad thai. like… so bad. like, i might die. please go get jungkook.”
you hesitate, your eyes flicking to the stairs. 
jungkook hasn’t come out at all. you don’t want to disturb anything and he’s a total grumpy-head when his study time is disrupted… what more if it’s a tutoring lesson? the last time you went up there, it ended with you calling him a dumbass and him tossing a pillow at you.
“i think you guys can go get him this time," you say, turning your attention back to your phone, pretending to scroll through a message.
"oh come on," jimin presses. "you know, at the end of the day… he only really listens to you." his voice drips with exaggeration, but it only makes you roll your eyes.
"yeah, that’s true…" hobi adds with a playful smirk, leaning back into the couch. "you’re like his… little bitch or something."
you shoot them both a look. “you think i’m his bitch?"
“either that or he’s your little bitch.”
you scoff at him. “please do not disgrace bitches by associating them with him.”
“fine, fine,” jin says with a dramatic sigh, raising his hands in mock surrender. “we won’t force you to go up… we’ll bribe you!”
your interest piques as you glance up at him, eyebrow raised. 
“bribe me? how much cash do you have today?”
yoongi and nam joon share a look. then, nam joon leans forward, his eyes twinkling mischievously. 
“milk tea," he offers, his voice low and enticing, like he knows exactly what will catch your attention. "… any boba store you want. any time… for a week, ___.”
you try to fight the grin that starts tugging at your lips. 
fuck it. 
you nod begrudgingly, slipping your phone into your pocket. 
“deal.”
taehyung bursts out laughing. “deal."
with a resigned sigh, you head for the stairs. 
as you climb up, you prepare yourself. 
you prepare yourself for his death glare and the innocent girl in the background. you prepare yourself for his snarky comments and his sweet tone of voice the minute he turns around to talk to her. you prepare yourself to feel sick to your stomach again. 
as you stand in front of his bedroom door and raise your fist to knock—you hear it. 
rather, you hear them. 
the unmistakable sound of his voice, muffled but clear enough that you can make out the low hum of his tone, followed by a girl’s laugh—a breathy, high-pitched laugh that makes your stomach twist.
you freeze, standing in the doorway, caught between disbelief and something you can’t quite name. your heartbeat picks up in your chest, your body tensing as the reality of the situation settles over you.
you’re not sure what exactly it is—maybe it’s the fact that it’s so casual, or maybe it’s the way the sound of it makes you feel like you’re intruding—but you feel a sudden flush creep up your neck and cheeks.
“oh my god, o-oh my g-god! t-that’s it, jungkook! oh god, baby… f-fuck!”
“fuck—you close, baby?”
“so close, baby. so fucking close. g-god, yes, yes, yes! nghh—fuck! so big, jungkook. oh my god, oh my god! fuck me, fuck me… j-just like that, baby. yes, y-yes–o-oh! mhmmmphhh—”
"shit, shit, shit..."
"fuck me harder, jungkook. please! o-oh? oh! oh my god! yes... yes! thank you, baby. thank you, thank you! ahhh... oh my god..."
you swallow, stepping back, retreating to the stairs. 
the guilt of overhearing makes your pulse race in an odd way, like you’ve been caught in something you weren’t supposed to see.
at the bottom of the stairs, you pause, your hand on the banister, unsure whether you should stay or go. 
you quickly decide. 
you’re already feeling the sting of something sharp and unfamiliar in your chest.
“guys,” you say quickly, trying to keep your tone light, but there’s an edge to it you can’t mask. "y-you know what? i think i’ll just head home. i’ve got a ton of work to do.”
they look at you, confused. taehyung blinks a couple of times, jimin frowning. 
“but we—"
"y-yeah,” you breathe. “i… i know. i just… it’s all good. you guys can go ahead without me,” you add, forcing a smile.
“slow down, ___. what—”
“i feel sick,” you confess. “okay? i feel sick.”
“okay… can one of us drive you home or something—”
“no. i’m good. thank you, though… i.. i gotta go.”
they all frown, their confusion morphing into concern, but you’ve already grabbed your things and hurried out the door before they can protest.
the cold night air feels like a slap to your face as you walk away, but it doesn’t quite shake the unsettled feeling in your stomach. 
you can’t stop thinking about it. 
about how you feel.
about what you heard.
about how much you fucking hate jeon jungkook.
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it’s almost 10PM by the time you finish showering. your hair is still damp, hanging loosely around your shoulders as you brush it out in front of the mirror. the soft swish of the brush is the only sound in the room, your thoughts still lingering on what happened earlier. the image of Jungkook with that girl, the sound of their voices together, keeps replaying in your mind, and it won’t leave.
you shut your eyes and try to forget. 
taking a breath in—your moment is interrupted by a knock on your door. 
you frown, glancing at the clock before moving to the door, towel still hanging from your shoulders. it’s late, and you weren’t expecting anyone. 
heading towards the door, you wonder who it is.
then, when you open the door, you freeze.
there, standing in the hallway with a takeout bag in hand, is jungkook. his face is unreadable, but his eyes—those eyes—seem to be searching yours for something. you can’t quite figure out what.
you blink, caught off guard by the unexpected visit, and for a moment, neither of you says anything.
“uh…” jungkook clears his throat, breaking the silence, his voice lower than usual. “the guys think i did something to piss you off… so i’m supposed to say sorry for… whatever i did.”
“you didn’t do anything,” you lie. “goodnight.”
just as you’re about to shut the door, he takes a step forward. 
“___,” he says, tone flat and annoyed. “don’t be a bitch. just tell me what i did so i can apologize, go home and tell them what i did wrong, and we can act like nothing happened—”
“okay,” you shrug. “you wore an ugly shirt today. there. say sorry.”
jungkook winces at you. 
“seriously?”
you shrug again. 
“what do you want, jungkook? i have nothing to say to you—”
“i don’t fucking understand where all this attitude is coming from. i didn’t do shit to you today. you know i didn’t… so, can you please use your tiny brain to make something up? something more convincing than hating my fucking shirt.” 
you nod, pretending to care. then, just as you reach for the door to shut it again; jungkook swiftly moves past you. he lets himself in. 
“they’re worried you didn’t eat,” he states. “did you eat?”
you groan at him. “why the fuck do you care?”
“i don’t.”
but his actions say otherwise. 
jungkook then takes off his shoes and heads to your coffee table. he sits himself on the floor and begins to unpack the food. silently, you watch as he does so and can’t help but feel like throwing up. 
“eat,” he commands. 
you glare at him. 
“get out.”
jungkook leans back against your couch. “eat, tell me what i did wrong, then i’ll leave.”
“leave first.”
“eat first.”
“get out.”
“holy shit,” jungkook scoffs. “are you even capable of forming a complex sentence, or is that too much for you? ___, this is called a conversation. you’re supposed to—"
“get out.”
jungkook sighs heavily. 
a silence falls upon you two. 
jungkook has had difficult days with you before.
this is nothing new… but for some reason, right now feels harder than the other days. partly because most days he knows when he’s being an asshole—but today? he has no clue. 
he’s in the dark. 
jungkook clears his throat. 
“i didn’t yell at you today,” he starts. “i didn’t call you names. you called me a nerd but that was it… your face ruined my day but i guess it made the others pretty happy since they were so pissed at me for being the reason why you left… so, hey… how about this? you tell me what i did wrong for the guys. not for me.”
you raise an eyebrow at him. 
his eyes plead. 
then, a moment passes. 
instead of answering him, you pick up your feet and sit on the floor beside him. you look at the door and take the utensils from the bag. poking at the food, you contemplate on telling him what’s going on in your head. 
just as you’re about to eat a spoonful of the food, you suddeny feel jungkook close to you. without saying a word, his fingers brush lightly against your cheek, making you hold your breath. his hand moves to tuck a damp strand of hair behind your ear, carefully pushing it out of the way so it doesn’t fall into your food. 
the gesture is so unexpectedly gentle that it catches you off guard, and for a second, you’re just left there, staring at him.
he looks at you sincerely. in his eyes, you can see his defeat. 
you don’t know if it was the gesture or the look in his eyes—but your words slip out of your mouth faster than you can think to stop it. 
“she was too loud.”
he tilts his head at you. 
“oh,” jungkook connects. his expression stiffens for a split second, then he schools it back into calm. “overheard, did you?” he asks, leaning in slightly, voice a low murmur. 
“oh, i definitely heard,” you reply, folding her arms, feigning thoughtfulness. “don’t act so cocky… she sounded like she was faking it.”
he stares, jaw flexing, and for a moment, there’s a flicker of something challenging in his eyes. 
“that’s cute coming from someone who couldn’t even stay for dinner.”
suddenly that pang of jealousy again hits again. 
you know you should just brush it off… keep your cool and act nonchalant about it—but something about jungkook just makes you feel so off balance. 
“maybe i had better things to do,” you retort. 
“like what?” 
you shrug. 
“like leave.”
“you should’ve knocked,” jungkook smirks. “i would’ve opened the door. we don’t mind an audience usually.” 
there it is again. 
the sick, sinking, icky feeling. 
“you two fuck often?”
jungkook looks away, taking a moment to think. 
“yeah,” he admits. “what? surprised nerds get laid?”
you stay quiet. 
“i mean.. it’s not really any of your business…" he mutters, though there’s a tension in his voice that doesn’t match his casual shrug. you can tell he's trying to brush it off, but the way his jaw tightens betrays him.
you feel your stomach tighten, the words you threw out lingering in the air between you, each one heavier than the last. you weren’t expecting him to react like this—maybe a joke or a deflecting comment—but not this… 
tension.
"right," you reply, your tone softer than you intended. you glance down at your food, suddenly losing your appetite. the casual air you were hoping for is long gone, replaced by an uncomfortable silence that neither of you seems willing to break.
jungkook shifts uncomfortably, rubbing the back of his neck before clearing his throat. 
"look, it’s not like that," he adds quickly, but the words sound almost too defensive. "she’s just... i don’t know. it’s nothing serious."
you don’t respond immediately, still caught up in the strange mix of feelings his words stir in you. the way he said it—like it was nothing serious—feels too much like an attempt to distance himself from whatever was going on.
you’re not sure what you wanted from this conversation, but now all you feel is a growing knot in your chest.
"yeah," you mutter, trying to sound indifferent, but the weight of his words hangs in the air, making your throat feel tight. "whatever you say—”
“why do you care anyway?” jungkook’s voice is sharp now, a slight edge creeping into his tone as he looks at you, his expression shifting from defensive to something you can’t quite place.
you’re caught off guard by the question. 
you weren’t prepared for that, weren’t prepared for the way it makes your chest tighten. why do you care? it’s not like you have any right to, right?
you open your mouth, but the words don’t come out. Instead, you just shrug, trying to play it cool, but you can feel your pulse quicken. 
"i don’t. i just—"
"you just what?" he interrupts, his brow furrowing, as though he’s not buying the act. "you’ve never cared before. why start now?"
you clench your fists at your sides, feeling the sting of his words more than you want to admit. There’s a part of you that wants to tell him—tell him how seeing him with her, hearing them laugh together, makes something ugly twist in your stomach. 
but you can’t.
"i don’t know," you finally mutter, your voice quieter than before. “it's weird. like, of course i knew you weren't a virgin but... are you actually that good? then again… doesn’t take much to fake sounds like her.”
jungkook’s eyes flicker to yours, something unreadable passing through them before he exhales sharply, running a hand through his hair. then, he smirks. 
it’s more calculated, though… like he knows exactly what he’s doing.
"curious?"
"disgusted, actually."
a beat.
"what, you wanted it to be you?" he asks, his voice smooth, a challenge in his tone.
you almost choke on your breath, but you recover quickly. "me? sleeping with you? please."
he lets out a low laugh, but it’s not playful this time. 
it’s more mocking. 
“yeah, i mean, i don’t even want you that bad…" he takes a slow look at you, like he's mentally assessing you, deciding if you’re worth his time. "not even close."
the words sting more than they should, but you keep your composure. 
you try to look unbothered, but his next words twist the knife a little deeper.
“fuck you.”
"you wish i’d fuck you," he remarks, almost casually, like it's no big deal. "would make things easier, huh?"
your chest tightens, and something about the way he says it makes your blood run cold. It’s not just teasing anymore—it’s a jab.
but you refuse to let him see how much it affects you.
"i’m not interested in you," you shoot back, your voice betraying none of the discomfort you’re feeling. 
he leans in a little, eyes never leaving yours. 
"really?" 
“really.”
his smirk widens, and you can feel the tension crackling in the air. 
“guess what? i think you care more than you're letting on. you act like you don’t give a shit, but it’s so obvious you’re just pissed it’s not you in my bed."
you bite your lip, trying to keep your voice steady, but something betrays you in the way your heart races. 
"i’m not pissed," you mutter, the words coming out too quickly, like you’re trying to convince yourself as much as him. "why would i be?"
jungkook watches you for a moment, taking in every little reaction. 
"i don’t know, ___," he says, his tone low and teasing, like he’s enjoying every second of this. "but it’s cute. you’re all flushed, trying to act like you don’t care, but i can see right through you."
you grit your teeth, wanting to snap back, but instead, you just look away. 
"shut up," you mutter, frustrated with yourself more than anything. "you’re such an asshole sometimes, you know?"
he laughs again, but this time there’s something darker in it, almost like he's reveling in your frustration. 
“i don’t think you’re as immune to me as you pretend to be," he says. "but hey, don’t stress about it, baby. i’m not that interested either. i mean, what’s the fun in fucking you? it’d be harder getting rid of you than getting in your pants.”
you feel the sting of his words hit harder than they should.
“are you done?” you mutter, forcing a nonchalant tone. "and don't call me baby. you called her baby. i don't want to be associated—"
"you think you'd fold as fast as she did?"
jungkook’s eyes flicker with something that could almost be amusement—or maybe something else. he clears his throat.
“shit, ___. i’m sorry—”
“yeah?” 
you don't know why, but something inside you snaps. 
you shift your body close to him. so close that you glance at his lips, then back up to his eyes, as if you’re weighing something—daring him to make a move.
jungkook’s body tenses, his breath shallow, like he's ready to close the distance… to make some sort of move. his lips part slightly as if he's about to speak, but before he can, you push him away. 
now, he’s tongue tied.
“shit, jungkook... i'm sorry," you mock him. "but you're wrong... this is fun."
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luvyeni · 2 months ago
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⠀ ( drabble ) not my problem ̨ ! ୨୧ 一 앤톤 ՞
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⸃ ⸰ ⌁ anton tired of being cock blocked by his members  ヾ
boyfriend!anton・ reader ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ g ・ smut ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ cw ・ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎unprotected sex, having sex while on the phone‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ wc ・ ‎0.9k ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎| ‎ ‎click to library
request. thinking abt needy anton who keeps getting cockblocked by the other members then finally has enough 😭🤭 ..
「 ୨୧ authors note 」 enjoy love 🫶🏽🩷!!!
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it's not like anton didn't like that you were friends with his friends; of course not, he met you through sohee — but it often came at a price; you two hardly got any privacy at the dorms. scratch that you didn't get any privacy at the dorms.
between them constantly just walking into his room , completely spoiling the mood; not to mention the teasing that followed right after by his older members… it's safe to say anton was tired of his members and although he loved them , he also loved getting his dick wet, but his members made sure that almost never happened.
what really did it in for him is when he realized he couldn't even escape it when he came over to your house. “baby.” he whined against your neck. “please , im so horny.” you two had not had any privacy for a while and anton felt like he was gonna burst in his pants. “fuck i need to be inside you before i die.” you chuckled at his neediness. “you're being dramatic ton.”
you weren't gonna lie , you needed him too; both of you were so busy , you were often forced to take care of each other over the phone while he was in a different country — but it wasn't like having him in person. “baby i can feel you.” he grinded his clothed cock against your heat. “fuck ton.” you mewled out , hands flying to his hair. “see you want it to.” he whispered in your ear. “when's the last time we actually fucked?”
you had no intentions of teasing him further. “take your shirt off.” he sat up , throwing his shirt off somewhere in the rush to get you outta your clothes. “can't wait to get inside you.” removing his pants, climbing back into bed with you. “gonna fill you up , nice and stuffed.”
you moaned as he rubbed the tip of his cock along your folds , legs twitching as his cock head kissed your clit. “fuck , keep your legs open.”
he was positioned at your hole , ready to feel your insides — when the imaginable happened… your phone rang. “fuck!” he yelled frustrated. “calm down , let me see who it is.” you reached for your phone , he was still hovered above you , cock desperate to be inside you. “well who is it?” he almost burst into flames when he saw who it was. “what the fuck could sohee want at this moment?
maybe he was thinking with his dick at the time , because he couldn't imagine himself saying what he said next. “answer it.” your eyes widened , surely your boyfriend lost his mind. “what no , i'll just call him back.” you said. “no he'll just keep calling , answer it."
“anton im not answering it— i said answer it.” his voice much deeper , shocking you , making you answer it almost immediately. “he-hey sohee.”
“took you long enough i could've been dieing.” he said. “im sorry was …” your mouth dropped open as you felt the stretch of your boyfriends cock. “you were what?” your friend said. “b-busy , i was busy.” you pushed at your boyfriend's waist trying to push him out of you, but he was much stronger , holding your waist down as he began to thrust inside you. “fuck keep talking.” he moaned. “was that anton? tell him i said hi.”
you tried to listen to your friend , but his yapping was completely overshadowed by the feeling of anton fucking into you vigorously. “yn you okay?” sohee asked. “you seem distracted.” you bit your bottom lip to contain a moan as antons cock kissed your cervix over and over. “fi-fine , just a long day.”
“you should make anton make you some dinner so you can relax.” you would've laughed at your boyfriend rolling his eyes , had he not sped up his movements fucking you with harsher thrust , you covered your mouth as his cock bullied your pussy. “fuck baby im about to cum.” he whispered. “hang up the phone.” he said. “hee i-i have to go.”
“hold on , im almost finished.” he said, continuing on with his story about something that happened to him — pissing your boyfriend off. “fuck it.” he sped up his pace. “fu-fuck sohee i really need to go.” you stuttered. “what are you even doing?” anton was quick to snatch the phone , still plowing into you. “what does it sound like?” he hit a particular spot making you moan loudly. “now she'll call you back when i'm done.” he hung up , tossing the phone. “fuck , fuck!” he cursed. “im gonna cum.”
your tits bouncing as he pounded into you. “fuck me ton , make me cum.” you moaned. “please make me cum.” he held one of your legs around his waist , the band in his stomach about to snap. “fuck!” you gasped. “fuck im cumming ton , im fucking cumming!” you screamed his name , the band finally snapping , both of you cumming at the same time , your juices coating his length as he filled you up. “fuck.”
“your phone has been blowing up for the past hour.” you said as your boyfriend sucked little marks into your neck post sex. “it's probably the groupchat.” and then it all came back to you , your blood running cold. “oh my god he probably told the entire group what you did.” he shrugged. “ton.” you boyfriend groaned , reaching over to turn his phone off. “now they know to leave me alone when im with you that's not my problem right now.”
“my problem right now is how many times i can make you cum before you pass out on me.”
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©LUVYENI
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neuvistar · 10 months ago
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AN ANGEL’S GIFT.
— featuring ┊sunday x fem!reader
— warnings / content warnings ┊all consensual! not proofread, cunnilingus, he plays w ur tits lol (t!tplay), established relationship, use of nicknames, mentions of breeding wooopeee (not rlly tbh its jus him yapping abt angel babies) a lil rushed but it’s okay! pt 2 will be out when i’m not lazy :3 | 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT.
— a/n ┊this might b a bit messy sincd it’s VERY late n i’m half asleep but i’ll correct things tmr! sunday has been on my mind 24/7 all day all night all morning it’s actually insanity.. sunday <33 tbh giys this doesn’t rlly have a specific theme.. it’s jus sunday eating u out n yapping abt giving u angel babies… instead of leaving n doing boring work business LMAO (the pt 2 will have more guys trust i’m jus a tad bit lazy..)
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“m—more sunday..”
the two of you spent a cherished night together in the hours before his impending departure to meet and discuss matters with the members of the IPC, catching news of them arriving to penacony a few days prior. in all honesty, you wanted this to last as long as it can.. you missed sunday’s touched, and he missed yours. as sunday caressed and kissed your body, your soft squirms and moans filled him with a pleasant sensation of affection for you. the halovian savored the moment as much as he could, cherishing every last bit of intimacy and closeness between the two of you. “you’ve always impressed me, my angel. it brings me pure joy hearing all sorts of sounds leaving your pretty lips.” soft moans that escaped your lips and the gentle caress of your fingers through his hair stirred up a pleasant sensation within him. even the sight of you wrapped up in his arms, his lips kissing your sensitive skin as your body writhes in pleasure, it made him feel the immense satisfaction and fondness between you two. even that, your presence itself brought sunday immense joy, and he made sure to relish every single moment together with you.
"please... don't stop..." your voice cracked slightly, betraying your own need. a chuckle rumbled from your husband’s throat as he leaned in closer. sunday grabbed hold of the hem of your shirt. with one powerful yank, it ripped clean off your body, revealing your lacy bra underneath. you gasped in surprise, your breasts jiggling slightly as they were exposed to his hungry gaze.. he could feel his cock throbbed even harder, practically leaping out of his pants at the sight of your firm breasts.
"so beautiful, my girl.” trailing his tongue along your collarbone, stopping just short of your neck. sunday’s hands moved downwards, roughly palming your breasts through the thin fabric of your bra.. aeons, they were soft and supple just like be remembered, heavy with anticipation. “it would be such a wonderful sight see these pretty things leak with milk don’t you think, sweetheart?” with a chuckle of desire, he ripped the bra apart as well, freeing your breasts from their restrictive confines. “think about it, my angel,” he pinched your nipples, earning another sharp gasp from you. “imagine.. your belly round and full with my heirs, your breasts heavy with their milk.”
his hot breath fanning over your sensitive nipples caught you by surprise, his talented tongue traced slow, teasing circles around your nipple, closing his lips around it as he sucked greedily. sunday’s tongue flicked and swirled around the sensitive tip, tasting your flesh.. breathing in your aroma, that same aroma that drove him to the edge. “talk to me, baby. what do you say? do you like the idea of that.. hm?” his hands roamed downward, lifting your skirt and pushing your panties aside in one swift motion, exposing your pussy to his hungry gaze.
“hng.. i mean, i’m not against the idea.. it’s just that..” you lost your composure completely when sunday went even lower down to your region, his tongue darted in and out of your folds unexpectedly. “ah.. hey! aren’t you supposed to be meeting with the IPC—“
“shush baby, work can wait.” sunday could feel your arousal building up, your body arched slightly as he continued his brutal attack on your sensitive cunt. his large hands and held your legs wide open, giving him full access to his feast as the wings that protruded from each side of his head tickled your skin. his tongue probed deeper, finding your core and teasing it with quick flicks. you were so vulnerable under him, and it turned him on even more. "i’ll make sure to take good care of you, but remember who's in charge here.. just enjoy my tongue. you should be grateful i’m here giving you attention you wanted for days rather than talking with them.”
your husband’s tongue flickered against your cunt once more, causing you to arch your back slightly. sunday was relentless in his pursuit of your pleasure, determined to make you feel good. "you’re so fucking small, angel.. it’s driving me insane." sunday’s voice was muffled by your flesh, he could feel the adrenaline coursing through your body every time his tongue explored every inch of her. "so innocent, yet so brave... fascinating." feeling your warmth envelop his face was like heaven to him, he wanted nothing more than to show you just how much he loved moments like these. the halovian reached up and grabbed your hips, guiding your movements against his face. goodness.. it was like he wanted you to suffocate him. “a place filled with life and chaos... much like your body." he licked and sucked at your folds, the rough muscle of his wetness swirling around your clit , his nostrils breathing in the scent of your arousal.
“to feel my tongue fucking and sucking this perfect little cunt.. this is truly an angel’s gift is it not, my wife?”
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binniesbooks · 5 months ago
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okay so here’s my request hehe.. i thought long and hard about this :>
alright so what about beomgyu (shocker) but he’s like your super rich (slightly older heh) boyfriend who loves loves loves to spoil you. so he buys the reader the most expensive and cutest piece of lingerie and has her try it on for him, ultimately leading to them fucking heh :>
soft dom beomgyu soft dom beomgyu soft dom beomgyu I BEG OF YOU 🙏
• LUXURY GIFTS
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BG 001 .F23 2024
wc 3.6k
pairings richbf!beomgyu x spoiledgf!reader
warnings a lot of cursing, marking, unprotected sex, creampie. softdom!beomgyu (did i miss anything?)
faye's note this is my first ever fic in Tumblr and here's my 'lil reign with my first ever ask. Won't stop yapping abt her being my inspiration. I gave her the honor and I'm gladly dedicating this one to her with all my heart. I poured out my blood sweat and tears here. I even remember your tip that I must start light, AND FOR FUCK'S SAKE, THIS, IN WHATEVER SENSE, IS NO LIGHT AT ALL. FUCK. Enjoy I guess! ㅇㅅㅇ For so many times, I kept on rereading this, not wanting to disappoint anyone of my grammar. I think I still need to work on my writing style, my grammar and my mind itself. Goodness. I-i'm just gonna give it a shot, hehe-
Totally dedicated to the one and only, @beomiracles *bows down*
Beomgyu was a hard-working boyfriend. He had always been the most hard-working person you know. He was always busy working on something even at the premise of his very own house. You often teased him as a slave at work even though, he, basically owned the company where he was working at. He may be always busy but he always makes time when it comes to you. He never forgets every detail about you, your likes and dislikes, and does not even need to mark his calendar to remind himself about dates because he knows when. Beomgyu is not your average type of boyfriend. However, people mistook him as just a worker and not the owner. The humble aura he carried is what made people mistake him for one.
Being with him wasn’t easy. Because of his friendly and approachable attitude, girls tend to hit on him, and sometimes it gets on your nerves causing an argument between the two of you.
"What the hell was that?" You raise your voice as you harshly step down the stairs to the parking lot from the party you two are at.
"Baby, please, at least stop walking and listen to me, you might trip and hurt yourself". He tries to catch your hand as you swing it away from him.
"There were so many times, I've warned you not to get too close to people who are eye-fucking you", you faced him, brows meeting.
He sighed as he stepped closer and held your hand.
"Princess. I'm being extra careful, promise. I wasn't even expecting that she would do that, but I pushed her hands away, I swear" he genuinely apologized as he caressed your hand.
You close your eyes, about to speak again when he interrupts you. "I promise, that will never gonna happen again". He cupped your face as he looked at your eyes.
"One more time a girl tries to place their hand on whichever part of your body, I'm gonna cut their hands" you fumed as you tried to erase the memory of that girl trying to fix Beomgyu's necktie.
"Her actions were too unnecessary given the fact that you have a girlfriend" you muttered under your breath as he gave you a tight hug and kept on apologizing.
"Not my fault you're younger than me and they mistake you as my sibling instead" he teased.
You shove him as you glare at him saying, "Excuse me, a two-year difference is not that big?! Plus are you enjoying the fact that you are being touched by other girls?"
"Words, miss. We don't want you getting in trouble with you accusing me, yeah?" He holds your face closer to his with a smirk plastered on his face. "I'm not enjoying it. I just wanna tease you, pretty. You don't have a clue how many million times I explained to those people who are around us that we are a thing, not siblings." He sighed and kissed your forehead.
"Why don't we go do some shopping instead? What do you say? It's still early. We can buy everything you want." He smiled as he cupped your face once again coaxing you.
"Just because I am agreeing to this doesn't mean we are all good now", you glared at him. He chuckles at your actions as he opens the door of his car.
"Get in princess, I'm going to buy you lots of gifts," he gestured as you sat down in your seat. You watched him circle the car and enter the driver's seat. You sighed, it is never easy to have a good-looking, humble, and kind type of boyfriend.
He drove to the store where he always buys you gifts and luxuries. This was a normal occurrence between the two of you. Him being the target of every girl, you fuming, and Beomgyu spoiling you to make it up to you. It might sound like he is bribing you but he's not. He just really loves spoiling you. If possible, he won't allow you to spend a single cent. Claiming that he is the man and he must be responsible ever since the two of you started dating. But of course, you also sometimes stand your ground and 25% of the time, he accepts losing to you.
Another normal occurrence was that you would get a flower delivered to your place before you go to work, every single day. And of course, who did it come from other than your boyfriend who loves to spoil you? You even thought of planting a whole garden with how many flowers he kept sending you. If only you had cool hands that could keep the flowers alive after planting. From flowers to accessories, from dresses to footwear. Anything that your eyes laid upon, he buys it, with or without your permission.
One Saturday morning, you woke up with a ringing phone. You grabbed it and answered without checking the caller's ID.
"Hello? Who is this? The sun is barely up..." You talked with eyes still closed, voice becoming faint. You heard a chuckle on the other side of the line. The voice registered to your brain, it was Choi Beomgyu, your boyfriend.
"Good morning sleepy head, happy anniversary." He greeted with such joy in his voice. Your once sleepy mind and body were fully awake now as you scrambled to sit up face palming your face. Remember how you set your alarm the night before to wake up early and be the one to greet him first but you ended up switching your phone off every time the alarm rang.
"I'm sorry, love, I wanted to be the one who greeted you first-- my goodness." You exclaimed as you mentally punched your head.
He chuckles once again as he tried to cheer you up, "It's fine baby, I know you are tired from work, it's too early to be upset"
"Happy anniversary, Beomie, I love you." You smiled and tried to sound more positive.
"I love you, princess. Oh, by the way, can you come alone here later? I might not be able to pick you up, I still have a lot more to prepare. Plus I'm planning to cook."
"Mmm, will do, baby. Don't worry." You answered as you stood up from your bed and placed your phone between your shoulder and cheek to make your bed.
"Are you sure though? I can still pick you up, you know, plus it's still early. We're gonna meet at 6 in the evening. I can make time." He asked.
"Beomie, you don't have to worry, really. I'm gonna finish my chores first, might run to a store and buy something before going straight to your place". You assured back.
"Okay then. I'll see you this evening, love. I'll be at work. I love you, take care of yourself." You answered with a sweet hum and a smile as if he could see you before he dropped the call. Beomgyu has been calling you different pet names, which did not even bother you a single bit. His sweetness shows through the way he calls you. You were so used to it that whenever he did not call you any, you knew that he was angry.
After finishing all your tasks and chores, you had to clean yourself up. Standing in the middle of your dresser, deciding on what you will wear.
You've been pondering already for half an hour. Digging every corner of your cabinet to look for something special to wear. You can't disappoint Beomgyu, especially today. He loves to spoil you and you love to show it off especially when you are with him. Well, he tells you to dress pretty all the time. If you were his wife already, he would have considered you a trophy wife.
Within a few minutes, you decided to wear the silk red designer dress he had recently bought you. It hugged every corner of your curves the right way. Although he did spoil you with so many accessories and wardrobes, he was not a fan of heavy makeup. He likes it simple. After dabbing some face powder and a gloss on your lips, you were good to go.
You immediately get up, and grab your phone, the gift you ordered a few days ago, your purse, and your car key. You were still planning to drop by a store nearby to buy some wine for the special night.
It was 10 minutes before 6 when you arrived at his place. "Hi love, how are you?" You greeted him as you placed the wine on the table that you brought from the store before you rushed to his side.
"I'm good princess. Maybe a bit exhausted. I doubled my work for my pretty girl", he smiled as he removed the apron wrapped around his waist. Repositioning the folded sleeves of his dress shirt.
"I'm almost done here, why not take a seat?" He approached you and kissed you while giving you a tight hug. "You look pretty..." His fingers brushed along your cheeks when he pulled away to look at you. "Happy anniversary" he muttered once again. You smiled at him as you tiptoed and gave him a quick kiss. "Happy anniversary Beomie" you giggled.
He pulled the chair for you and made you sit down, "could you wait for a couple minutes more? I'm almost done. " You nod at him.
You shared the evening with sweet talks and love lingering between the two of you. Sharing the food he cooked and the wine you bought.
"I have a gift for you." You said joyfully as you placed the glass of wine carefully on the table. "It might not be much, since you have everything." You playfully roll your eyes as you push the small box in front of him.
"You can open it now." You said as you clasped your hands near your cheeks. Excitement can be easily heard from your voice.
He carefully unwrapped the gift as if almost scared to destroy it. His eyes widened at the gift you gave him.
"Love, you didn't have to." His eyes softened when he looked at you. It was a wristwatch. It was nothing compared to everything he bought you. But this particular one was hard to find. He couldn't find it in the stores you both often go to. He dislikes online shopping, saying it's too much of a hassle. So, you, as a loving girlfriend, patiently search every single online shop you know, just to find this watch.
"It's nothing compared to everything you have given me, Beom." You held his hand and looked at him lovingly. He smiled sweetly at you as he sighed in defeat.
Beomgyu has always been a big fan of extravagance and elegance, and tonight, he was eager to show it off again to you. He asked you to close your eyes as he stood up to grab the gift he bought. When you opened your eyes, a beautifully wrapped box sat invitingly on the table.
“Open it,” he said, a playful glint in his eyes. You excitedly open the box. Inside, you found the most exquisite lingerie—a lingerie that shimmered softly, and you bet it wouldn't cover you fully.
Your eyes are wide as you stutter to talk to him.
"L-love, what...what is this?" This is the lingerie your eyes always laid upon whenever you go to that one place with Beomgyu. You just always smile at yourself every time you see this, shaking off the naughty ideas building in your mind. But to hold it with your own hands, to be gifted it to you as your own, it makes you so shy.
“Try it on for me,” he urged, his excitement palpable. He crossed his arms on his chest as he stared at you, a smirk, once again, plastered on his face. You felt a rush of anticipation as you headed to his bedroom, slipping into the lingerie. Staring at your reflection in the mirror. Unsure if you want to go out and face him. Your cheeks show a visible bright hue of pink, and your ears red.
Beomgyu was the one to follow you when you did not show. Beomgyu’s expression was one of pure admiration. “Wow,” he breathed, stepping closer. “You look breathtaking.” The red lingerie is barely covering your chest, you are thankful that there was a free mini skirt cut of the lingerie that can cover you below.
He circled you slowly, taking in every detail, before leaning in to whisper, “Fuck, it fits you perfectly." He tucks your hair on the back of your ear. Your ears burn hot with embarrassment and with the sensation. Yes, you've been with Beomgyu for a while but you haven't taken it to the next level, aside from heavy make-outs of course, that's why you feel so small and embarrassed in front of him.
He made you face the big mirror again, as he stood at your back. He gently placed his arms on your neck. You couldn't help but whimper at how you looked. You shut your eyes as you felt a shiver down your spine.
"Fuck." He cursed once more, almost unheard. "Don't make a sound like that, sweetheart. I might not be able to control myself." He places his other hand on your waist, taking a dip where your neck and shoulder blades meet as he inhales your scent. "You smell so sweet."
"Beomgyu, please..." You can feel yourself trembling in his hands. He pulls away, making you frown a little bit. He walked towards the bed as he sat down on the edge.
"C'mere." He taps on his lap as you walk towards him. You swear you heard him mutter 'fuck's' and 'shit's' under his breath. You sat on his lap as he held your waist, letting his lips crash on yours. You clawed on his chest for the sensation you are feeling. The kiss he's giving you is careful but needy, gentle but hot. You both pull away, lips swollen, and steam can be felt between the two of you.
"Please tell me to stop now. I can't afford to hurt you." He closed his eyes as he tried to ground himself. With mustered-up courage, you slowly got off of him and started to get down instead.
"Sweetheart, I'm warning you." He tried to warn you as he held your wrist. You shook your head. "I've been dying to do this to you, Beomie". You stared up at him as you slowly unbuckled his belt.
"Fuck, please..." He bit his lips. Still trying to control himself. You raise his dress shirt a bit, enough for his abdomen to show.
You slowly stroke him when he finally lets go of your wrist.
"Ah! Shit- love, fuck." You can see how his abdomen clenches at the sensation. You lowered your head, giving him kitten licks, testing the waters, tasting his pre-cum. He held your hair, not enough to hurt you but enough to take control. He tried to lower your head more, making his tip be fully shoved into your mouth.
"Fucking hell. You look so pretty." He loosens his grip on your hair and carefully caresses your face, as you lean on his hand. He voluntarily removed the buttons of his shirt discarding it at the bedside.
His hands moved back to your head once again as he pushed you down a bit more making you whimper. He cursed once again as he felt the vibrating sensation from your mouth. "Are you okay?" He checks you. Only for him to moan again as you hum on his cock in your mouth. Once he knows you got used to him, he controls the moment of your head, making you clench on nothing. You are guessing he is almost coming undone when his voice gets a bit higher in pitch.
"Fuck, stop right there." He commanded, making you stop your movement. He pulled you up to kiss you once again, this time a bit more aggressive than the first one. He pulled away, only to press his thumb on your lips. "Hot.." you muttered, before sucking on his thumb. The action got Beomgyu reeling as his remaining self-control slipped out.
He made you stand up and lay down on the bed as he discarded his pants. You were not expecting him to go down on you but he is Beomgyu. The guy who always puts you first. The guy who always took care of you first instead of himself. His fingers swiftly removed the newly bought lingerie,
You trembled when you felt his tongue lap onto your cunt. He gripped your waist to stop you from squirming away from him.
"Beomgyu! Ah fuck! Fuck it feels so good!" The voice came out strained. He hums and looks up at you as he rubs a circular motion on your sensitive nub.
"Please, please Beomgyu! I-i'm gonna cum!" Your eyes well up with tears. As you beg him, unsure of what, you chant him as many please as your mouth can say.
He tasted a salty-sweet taste on his tongue as you come undone, fucking his tongue in and out of you as you ride your high.
"Give me one more, love, I know you can." He said as he once more made you cum on his tongue.
"You tasted so sweet. I might be addicted to your taste, damn."He mutters as he hovers over you, littering your neck with dark red and purplish marks. You tried to grind on him which he immediately felt and smiled.
"Never thought you'd be this eager. I should've bought that lingerie a long time ago if I only knew." He chuckled as he pressed a deep kiss on your still-swollen lips.
He supported his body up with his arms. Your eyes watched how his muscles flexed on both of his arms. You can't help but hold on to it knowing what is happening next.
"Should we stop, love? I have no condoms prepared. I really didn't know we were taking it up to-"
"Please take me raw." Your eyes pleading. You held his arms tighter. He stared at your love bites- littered body as he bit his lips.
"If you ask me like that, how can I even say no?". He held your cheeks for a while before totally discarding his boxers. "Tell me if it's too much and we'll stop. I want to ruin you but I don't wanna hurt you, darling." He sincerely said as he lined himself up at your entrance.
You never felt a sensation this good before. His raw flesh drags inside you slowly. "More. I can take it" you assured, shaking off the stretching pain you are feeling.
"Please tell me the truth. I think I'm hurting you, baby." He worries. You hug him closer as you ask him to fully push in. "Please push it in more, Beom. I need more.." you muttered, cock drunk, fucked out.
He can't help but to bit his lip and bottom out in you as he stared at your fucked out expression. "Fuckin' tight. You feel so good, wrapping around my cock, baby." He smirked at you. You avoided his gaze out of embarrassment as
"I'll start moving." He announced still staring at you as he slowly moved in and out. You are now a whimpering and a moaning mess in front of him. The pretty girl who once was pretty in his eyes when angry is now all fucked out. Unable to form coherent words as whimpers, whines, and moans are the only thing that comes out of your mouth.
"Ahh! Shit love, please stop clenching on me or I might cum inside you!" With a warning tone, he tries to stop you. But every time you hear him curse, you heard him moan as if on cue, as you were clenching on his cock. You can't help yourself but clench on him some more.
"I'm.. fuck.. fuck! Fuck Beomgyu! Oh god!" You were squirming under him, feeling every bit of his cock drag in your insides. It's giving you too much sensation you couldn't handle.
"Come on my cock then. Show me how much you love me, baby. Show me how much you can do for me." He himself can't help but move faster inside you with his high nearing.
You clawed on his arms making him wince as you come undone on his cock, body shaking, he held you closer as he fucks you more into your high, his white thick cum painting your walls. "Shit!" He exclaimed as his ears rang when he pushed more inside, making your lips quiver and your eyes shut close.
A few more seconds when he calmed down from his high he pulled out of you. Almost ran to the bathroom to grab a wet towel. In everything, he puts you first, cleaning you more than himself. He grabbed a shirt from his closet and made you slip it on to make you feel comfortable. He picked up his pants to wear them again as he laid beside you.
You mouthed 'Happy anniversary, love' before you buried your face in the crook of his neck. He chuckled as he pulled you closer and hugged you as he tucked you both under the blanket. Allowing you and himself to dive deep in sleep.
'This was a better gift than the watch, I guess', he thinks to himself.
@binniesbooks 2024
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ghostbeam · 4 months ago
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Oblivi_n.exe | Dabi/Touya Todoroki
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Touya Todoroki, known as ‘Dabi’ to the league, quirk class: cremation, mech title: Blue. You’re his new handler. 
As Dabi’s new handler, you’re well aware of his history, how frequently he goes through handlers assigned to him. Not that he ever uses them—it’s more complete resistance. You’re not particularly good at your job. Transferred from the PLF for lack of success in handling any of their pilots, you’ve always been far too gentle. You lack authority. Your pilots never respected you. You don’t think Dabi will be any different. You give it a week. 
Notes: okay wow hiiiii it’s been a long time since I’ve posted an actual fic (nearing almost a year now😬) this is something I’ve been working on for a bit. I have mech brain rot curtesy of @streimiv and @hawnks (both of whom this is dedicated to bc there’s no way I could have written this without yapping to them abt it and also mint helped me come up w the acronym for HERO’s) and we’ve all got our own mech fics in the works atm but anywayssssss this is kind of my baby atm but I hope it makes sense it’s very inspired first and foremost by pacific rim and then also NGE (mostly through consumption of YouTube vids bc I haven’t actually watched it pls don’t hate me) it’s a whole mess of things and Dabi is kind of a bitch and reader is slowly coming into herself and at the end of the day they both wanna be metal fused to one another forever (no matter how hard he denies it) also I’m not a huge computer person idk if this title makes sense so don’t make fun of me pls ok anyways I hope u like it!!!!
Warnings: 18+, minors DNI, pilot!Dabi x handler!reader, there’s no explicit sexual content in this part, not even a kiss sorry guys, mentions of robot gore (exposed wires, insides described as guts), brief descriptions of being trapped inside a small space, descriptions of burning while inside said space, mention of surgery to fashion a metal jaw onto someone, mentions of child abuse (nothing graphic just allusions to the todoroki family and touya’s past), angst, many run on sentences, a small cliff hanger
Words: 7.9k
Pt. 1 | Pt. 2 (coming soon)
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You are nothing without your machine.
It’s the first rule, the first thing beaten into his brain by his father. You carry the burden of the mech alone, or you’re weak. You don’t exist. 
U.A. raises the best and brightest pilots, navigators, mechanics, and handlers, each one carefully trained to ensure the most important outcome: winning. It should be protection. It should be defense. But if Touya has learned anything at all, it’s that winning means glory. It means worship. It means HERO’s (Human Engineered Robotic Objects) are saints, and pilots are gods. 
 Touya used to be one of those best and brightest before his accident. 
First son to Enji Todoroki, Touya was supposed to be the golden child, the first Todoroki to pilot without a handler. He was supposed to carry the burden alone, something his father couldn’t do, something only one man has ever actually been capable of. 
But Touya is born weak, bad bones, a brain unable to handle all that the mech needs to unload onto it. One too many accidents results in him being expelled from the pilot program, his HERO discarded and collecting dust in its pod, and Touya is promptly transferred to mechanics. 
It should have been a smooth transition. If one kid can’t handle it, the next will. Because they have to. 
He doesn’t take the news well. It’s a fit of tears, a persistent fight, unable to accept the loss of his machine—of his body. Because Touya loves it. What he lacks in strength, he makes up for in pure passion, and despite being unable to handle the burden, there’s no denying that he’s good. He’s almost perfect. 
But almost is not enough for Enji Todoroki, and no matter how hard Touya tries, he’s made up his mind. 
After months of mechanics, Touya makes a decision. When the next fleet of HERO’s is deployed for the next kaiju battle, Touya sneaks in among the chaos, tucked neatly inside the chest of his machine where he belongs. It doesn’t take long for things to go south, for Touya to get caught in the crossfire, losing control of his mech and burning from the inside out. 
It should be an excruciating death, stuck inside a machine made for war, fire raining from above as a battle continues on outside without him. 
But he survives, because what he lacks in strength, he makes up for in resilience, and his mech is programed with solutions to every situation. He’s stuck inside for months before he’s found.
Tomura Shigaraki rescues him, pries open the chest of his mech and pulls him from inside. His group feeds him, takes him in, fashions a new jaw for him made from the metal of his mech, and allows him the decision to join their cause or go back home. 
And since there’s no home to go back to, Touya finds his footing with the league and becomes one of their top pilots. One who vehemently resists any and all handlers.
Touya Todoroki, known as ‘Dabi’ to the league, quirk class: cremation, mech title: Blue. You’re his new handler. 
As Dabi’s new handler, you’re well aware of his history, how frequently he goes through handlers assigned to him. Not that he ever uses them—it’s more complete resistance. You’re not particularly good at your job. Transferred from the PLF for lack of success in handling any of their pilots, you’ve always been far too gentle. You lack authority. Your pilots never respected you. You don’t think Dabi will be any different. You give it a week. 
Following closely behind Tenko, formerly Tomura, he quickly explains to you the in’s and out’s of the pilot/handler relationship, along with a warning about Dabi’s resentment toward the whole idea. You try to keep up, but he talks quickly and uses his hands a lot. Even so, you can tell he’s a natural leader, something he had to grow into after overthrowing the man who raised him. His story is a tragic one, and it resonates with you because Tenko came out the other side stronger. Now, the league is a community with a cause, one you really believe in. Even if you and Dabi aren’t the right fit, you still have a place here. 
You follow Tenko into what he calls the garage, a large floor of the abandoned academy that serves as the league’s base, this part of it full of HERO’s and mechanics all focused on the machines in front of them. It’s completely different from how HERO’s were worked on at UA, where you grew up, and even the PLF didn’t have one dedicated floor to this sort of work. You can feel the energy of the room buzzing on your skin, music blasting from old radios and mechanics tossing tools towards one another in a familiar routine. Tomura leads you to Dabi and his HERO, Blue, though you’re instructed not to call it a HERO around him. With goggles over his eyes and gloved hands, he brings two wires from Blue’s ankle together, sighing at the way they spark each time they connect. 
“Dabi.” Tomura calls over the music coming from the radio hanging off of Dabi’s waist. He drops the wires and his gaze flickers toward the two of you. Pushing his goggles up to his forehead, he gives you a once over. His eyes are the brightest you’ve ever seen—kaiju blood blue—and burn scars litter his body. He’s striking in a way you’ve never seen, almost too beautiful to be human. Giving Dabi your name, Tomura explains that you’re taking over as his handler, seeing as he couldn’t keep the last one for more than a couple of days. “She’s your last handler. If you can’t keep this one, then go ahead and fry your brain. See if I care.”
“You say that every time.” Dabi calls from around sucker as Tomura walks away, leaving you alone with your new pilot. 
You just your hand out in a greeting, “I’m looking forward to working with you.”
Eyeing your hand, Dabi shakes his head and turns his back to you, picking the two wires back up and connecting them again, despite the same spark from before igniting between the two. He looks back up at Blue, touching his fingers to the slim lines starting at the back of her ankle and running all the way up her leg. You peak over his shoulder at the wiring, noticing that he’s connecting two of the wrong ones. 
“It’s the wrong wire.” You tell him, and he spins around to look at you, tearing his goggles from his face as he scoffs. 
“Here we go.” He sighs with a roll of his eyes, pulling the candy from his lips and tossing it onto the tool cart without a care. “Handler know-it-all bullshit. This is my mech.”  
You push passed him and grab the similarly colored wire from beside a red wire and connect it with the one in Dabi’s right hand. Blue lights up cyan through the thin lines that run along each of its limbs and torso, connecting with the two cameras within its head, which seem to blink before the light reaches them. 
In an instant, you’re being pushed up against the hard metal, a strong arm over your chest—pinning you up against the HERO. Dabi, now having discarded his goggles, looks at you full of white, hot rage. 
“Don’t fucking touch her.” He growls. You’re suddenly aware of the close proximity, eyes flickering between the snarl across his lips and his angry gaze. For a beat, you both freeze, the air suddenly charged like you’re waiting for one another to strike. Snapping yourself out of his hypnotic stare, you push against his chest, forcing him to let you go. 
“If I’m going to be you’re handler, you’re going to have to trust me with her.” You remind him. He lets out a harsh laugh, like he can’t believe you would suggest such a ridiculous idea. 
“I don’t trust anything but this machine.” He speaks, turning away from you to seal up the machine’s exposed wires. It’s a challenge you’re willing to accept.
“Well, I’m here to change that.” You tell him, before turning on your heel to leave him alone. 
He thinks he’ll give you a week. 
One of the worst parts of being assigned a handler, Touya thinks, is the way that pilot/handler living quarters are set up. He assumes the academy, before it was abandoned and turned into a base for the league, created this sort of set up so that handlers could keep a close eye on their pilots. The handlers Touya has burned through up until now also assumed the same. 
The door that connects both the pilot’s and handler’s dorms doesn’t lock, and all of Touya’s past handlers have taken advantage of this fact. He’s been pulled out of bed far too early, pushed around and commanded and barked at. Most handlers behaved as if pilots belonged to them, which was the sentiment drilled into their brains from being thrown into such a fucked up system at a young age.—unless you were a pilot of status like a Todoroki. While he league dedicates a lot of its time to reversing these ideas, most handlers look at Touya like some kind of challenge, this arrogant pilot begging to be tamed. It never takes long for them to realize how easily he’s able to flip the switch on them. You’ll be no different.
But hours pass and you still haven’t entered. You don’t swing the door open and demand he apologize for his behavior earlier. You don’t try and punish him with training regimes, a command of a set of push ups, a schedule you expect him to follow, an extremely detailed meal plan. The entire evening comes and goes without so much as a sound on the other side of the door so he knows you’re even behind it. 
He falls asleep unnerved by this, waking up late into the night in a cold sweat, expecting you to barge in, rip the covers from his body and demand to train together. When he wakes up (peacefully) the next morning, there’s no sign of you. He rises from his bed, drinks orange juice straight from the carton and eats a candy bar for breakfast. He fiddles with the navigation screen from his mech that stopped working a couple of days ago, tools spread out on the counter in front of him. Once he’s got the thing working again, your knock sounds from the unlocked door between the two of you. He thinks this might be it, the commands he expects to fall from your lips at the ready as he swings the door open, but you stand there, nervous, hands twitching as your eyes finally meet his.
Greeted by a shirtless Touya, hair mused from sleep, cargo pants hung low on his hips, dog tags swinging against his chest, his scars on display, unashamed and proud. The sight of him knocks the breath out of you, and you clear your throat in embarrassment, hoping your state of dreaming comes off as nerves rather than lust. 
“Dabi. Or do you prefer Touya?” You smile. When he doesn’t answer, you continue. “I wanted to see if you wanted to eat breakfast together in the caf. I think we should start over. Yesterday was—”
You’re promptly cut off, “I already ate breakfast.”
With a harsh slam of the door, he leaves you stunned in your room.
You eat alone. 
When you started as a pilot, back when you’d entered UA (a few years about Touya’s accident), you went into it believing you could change the world. The exam had placed you into the position of handler, and you were assigned a pilot who had always seemed a little frightened of you despite your obvious lack of authority. Bringing the fact up to your instructors did nothing. They all assured you that this was the ideal dynamic, that the handler always had the upper hand, but you hated that feeling. You weren’t a team like you expected to be; you were urged to control your pilot. You were there to keep them in line, not to be a pillar of support. The bond was never built on trust, and the soul link was always a looming threat. No matter how many pilots you went through, the link was never held as a gift, but a prison, something you would both be stuck with for the betterment of society, a sacrifice to make. 
You’d been expelled from the handler program after guiding your pilot to help save another in the wreckage of your first battle together, resulting in the damage of your pilot’s HERO. Your pilot was okay, but the other couldn’t be saved, and you were blamed for the damage of both mech’s. 
When you found the league (or when the league found you), you were working with the PLF, but proved to be a weak handler. Every pilot you were assigned to took advantage of your optimistic outlook on the kind of relationship dynamic that pilots had with their handlers. Despite all that you had been through at UA, and with the rest of the pilots you’d been paired with after, you never gave up the hope that handlers and pilots could behave as a team, or, even better, one entity. 
Tenko had taken one look at you and demanded you’d be transferred to the league. There hadn’t been much of a choice in the matter, not that you really cared. You were miserable everywhere else. But when you arrived at the abandoned academy and taken a peak behind the kudzu covered walls where each and every area of the building acted as multiple moving parts in collaboration with one another in order to create one massive system, you realized that this was the future you imagined for yourself—and for the world you lived in.
Tenko saw something in you that day, something you aren’t sure you even see in yourself. And so Dabi was your first task, one that’s proving to be very difficult. But he doesn’t treat you like all the other pilots before had. He doesn’t use you. In fact, it seems like he wants nothing to do with you. And while that’s a problem, it’s still one you can work with. 
You’re broken from your thoughts by the sound of a voice through an overhead intercom asking for everyone to meet on the first floor of the academy at their earliest convenience. Judging by the quick movements of those around you, you figure you’d better head downstairs as soon as possible. 
The meeting on the first floor makes you very aware of just how small the league really is. While it’s definitely not a tiny organization, it’s still much smaller than both UA and the PLF. With everyone piled up like this in one group, you realize it feels more like a community, and the hum of conversation that surrounds you comforts you in a way you’ve never felt within the walls of any other academy before. 
There’s discussion about the upcoming mission, one which may be the league’s most ambitious yet; the plan to hijack a mech and kidnap a pilot may be a little unorthodox compared to the league’s past missions, but the jaded pilot they’re targeting has a high chance of joining the cause. Or that’s what they have assumed. As the bodies move and speak around you, it strikes you how different this meeting is from any other meeting you’ve ever been a part of. Tenko is less a dictator and more a wrangler for the disembodied voices of your peers. 
You don’t know much about his story, save for the vague details you’ve heard, but Tenko’s status as a lone handler is something you find yourself curious about. If he’s able to work without a pilot, why can’t you? It’s an idea you keep in your back pocket, one you think you can fall back on if things with Touya don’t work out. But you want them to work out. So badly. 
You aren’t sure what it is about him, but he’s reignited that spark inside of you. You know he’d rather you give up, and maybe the you from a couple of months ago would have, but something about him—and this place—won’t let you leave. 
As you observe the meeting, you take the time to look around the room, taking in your peers and their attentive faces as they listen to Tenko intently. You turn to your right, your eyes meeting a pair of blue ones, impossible to miss. Dabi holds your stare for what feels like ages, and when your colleagues erupt in a fit of many simultaneous discussions, you tear your eyes from his to observe the commotion. When you glance back in his direction, he’s gone. 
You don’t seem him again after that. You train with other handlers, get to know your peers a little better. Everyone else seems to be welcoming, and most offer you sympathy when they find out you’re Touya’s new handler. From what you can gather, he’s had his fair share of them, all of which have quit or left in hysterics due to his harsh nature. When you ask around about where he could be, you’re told that he’s most likely in the garage, a place you assume he’s in more often than not.
You don’t know if you’ll ever get used to the garage. A place so completely different, so against the ideas and beliefs of any other academy you’ve been a part of, the chaos and community within is so foreign to you. You find Touya with Blue, working inside of her chest, where the cockpit is. 
“Touya!” You call up to him and watch as he peaks his head over the edge of her metal plating. Annoyance falling across his face, he jumps down from where he stands, landing hard on his feet in front of you. 
“What are you doing here?” He questions, his figure so tall and imposing above you. He’s not particularly muscular, not even all that tall compared to Tenko, but he makes you feel small regardless, in more ways than one. Rolling your shoulders back, you stare straight into his eyes, unwilling to back down. 
“I figured you wanted your space today.” You explain, as Touya moves around you to get to his rolling cart of tools, forcing you to turn toward him and follow him if you want him to hear you. “I know adjusting to a new handler is rough, and I never want to make you uncomfortable. But I was thinking we could try some of those pilot/handler bonding exercises. It might be good to start training like some of the others do.”
He drops the wrench in his hand onto his cart with a loud thud, turning around toward you with a look of disbelief on his face. “Pilot/handler bonding exercises? They really brainwashed the shit out of you at UA, huh?”
At the mention of your past academy, your eyes widen in surprise. You had no idea he knew about that. Clearing your throat in order to compose yourself, you speak again, “I left UA for a reason. I have no attachment to their methods, but you guys do the same stuff here, so what’s the issue?”
“The issue is that I never asked for a fucking handler in the first place, especially not one as eager as you.” He spits, “Sure, you’re understanding now, all that bullshit about ‘giving me space,’ but the moment you get a lick of power over me, you’ll change. You’re not different.”
“I don’t want power over you. This is an equal exchange. Pilot’s and handlers are meant to be a team—” You try and argue, but he doesn’t let you finish. 
“That’s what they told you, right? We’re a team, and as teammates, you make sacrifices. And it doesn’t matter if one of you turns into the other’s braindead dog because that’s your place.” His words hit you hard, the exact thought process you went through when leaving UA, completely disillusioned with their idea of “teamwork.” He’s right, and you know it, but since coming here, you thought that wasn’t how it had to be.
“Look, trust me, I get—” You’re cut off again.
“You went to UA! There’s no trusting you.” He scoffs, “It’s not like you’ll last here, anyway.”
“You are such a hypocrite! You’re from UA!” You retort, throwing your arms up in desperation. “You can hate me all you want. You can resist and resist and fry your brain ‘till there’s nothing left, but I believe in this shit. And you don’t get to tell me that I don’t, or tell me I’ll turn into something I worked so hard to get away from.”
Touya stands there, surprised by your outburst, completely unaware that you were capable of all of that. He doesn’t say anything back, and you roll your eyes. “So fuck you, and, by the way, her angel port is smoking.”
At your words, he turns in a rush, seeing the smoke billowing from Blue’s chest as he climbs his way up her form. Once inside his machine, he extinguishes the port and allows himself to relax. There are two things on his mind in this moment: how you could have possibly known it was the angel port without being inside of Blue’s chest and how, for the first time in a long time, he feels bad for his handler.
But for you, it’s the first time you’ve ever held your own against a pilot before, and that feels good.
Something feels weird.
Off, unsettling, strange.
He realizes, much to his dismay, that it’s your absence. Despite only having you around for such a short time, Touya has realized that your lack of presence now feels wrong. He hates it. He hates you. 
He can’t find you. You haven’t knocked on his door. You’re not in the caf, not the garage, not the sparring floor, not in your room. And he did check—without knocking. 
He’s not even sure how he can feel an absence. You aren’t a regular part of his life, and he never wanted you to be. But he feels all fucked up.
During training, Touya jams Blue’s halo core and she leaks vibrant neon from between her ribs. It takes him half an hour to get her reboot her system and rips one of the cables attached to the back of his suit in the process. He spends the afternoon cleaning HERO fluid off the sparring floor. 
During repairs, he shocks himself over and over while trying to fix her core, fingers burning from the sparks each time he arranges the wires inside. The cameras in her eyes won’t work from the reboot, and Blue won’t let him unlock the lens panel to fix it. It’s almost like she’s mad at him too.
He’s a complete mess. It’s your fault. He has no choice but to go looking for you. Again.
He searches every wing of the academy before concluding that you’re in your room. He barges through the joint door, spotting you at the counter in your tiny kitchen. You’re surprised by the intrusion, a frightened gasp falling from your lips as you jump in your seat. You turn toward him, prepared with angry words on your tongue, but Touya speaks first.
“You’re not getting an apology out of me, so don’t expect it.” He begins, moving to stand in front of your swiveling kitchen stool as he looks down at you. “But I’m willing to be civil with you, so we don’t have to do this shit anymore.”
You’re not exactly sure what “this shit” is, but Touya looks a little worse for wear at the moment, so you don’t question it. He places a tray from the caf down in front of you that you hadn’t noticed in his hands upon arrival, says nothing else, and turns to leave the room. After shutting your joint door, you look down at the tray of food, noticing one of his suckers placed onto a vacant compartment of the tray. 
You’re greeted the next morning with a knock on your door, Touya dressed in his pilot’s suit on the other side as you swing the door open. “C’mon. You’re gonna watch me train today.”
You watch him turn around to leave, expecting you to follow. You rush to pull on your combat boots and grip your dog tags in your fist as you rush to catch up to him. He doesn’t spare you a glance as you fall into step beside him, taking a look around his dorm before he leads you through the exit door. 
“You need to get a feel for my fighting style.” He explains as you walk down the corridor. “I’m not saying I’ll listen to you when it comes down to it, but it’s important for you to know.”
You nod, agreeing that you should definitely observe him inside of his HERO. By understanding his moves, you’ll be able to understand the way he thinks, and you’ll be able to help him in actual combat if needed. He’s already said he won’t listen to you, but it won’t stop you from trying. He stops abruptly, turning to look at you, and you stop with him. 
“If we’re gonna do this, it’ll be on my terms. I’m not your dog.” He tells you, seriously. He eye’s you up and down, taking in your expression as you nod at his words. “If anything, you’re mine.”
He begins walking again, leaving you in your spot, irritation filling your chest as you watch him, smug. “Asshole.” You curse under your breath.
“What’d you say?” He barks, turning to look at you abruptly.
“You’re an asshole.” You speak louder. He walks back toward you, making sure to tower over you intimidatingly as he looks down at you in annoyance. His eyes flicker down to the tags around your neck before hooking a finger on the chain and pulling you closer. 
“Watch it.” He drops the chain and walks away again. 
You follow him to the sparring floor, and he shows you where to go to watch. Stood behind a large window that looks over the sparring area, other members of the base watch the HERO’s engage in combat below. You spot Tenko and he motions for you to stand beside him. 
“I knew he’d warm up to you.” He comments. The last of the previous battle finishes and you watch the two enormous machines retreat to the sides of the area, their pilots emerging from their chests with their handlers rushing to the bottom of the mech’s in support. 
“He hasn’t. He’s not.” You shake your head. You aren’t sure why you deny it, if it’s some way to keep your expectations low or if there’s some kind of embarrassment aspect to the whole thing. Whatever is happening between you and Touya feels intimate and private, something that the two of you need to figure out for yourselves, not something meant for the eyes of others.
“Hm. Okay.” Tenko shrugs. “Guess not.”
You hadn’t noticed Touya enter his mech at all. You see the swing of one giant mechanic arm, too close to the window you stand behind, and you’ve shifted your full attention to the scene at hand. 
The enormity of the room surprises you, despite the fact that you had seen it just moments before. But when you’re truly looking at it, watching these huge machines go at each other, the way the ground shakes, the leaves outside shake, the deep forrest clear in view from the wall that opens out to the greenery (the lack of a wall is likely from the academy’s abandoned state, but it’s a good feature to have on the sparring floor when giant robots are toppled over onto various surfaces).
The way Blue moves is electric, mechanic movements almost feel fluid with the way that Touya pilots her, easily dodging attacks from their opponent and moving around them in the most graceful way a giant machine can. It’s beautiful, unlike any fighting style you’ve ever seen in a HERO before. 
“He’s showing off for you.” Tenko observes from beside you. You don’t argue with him, only because you can’t dispute it. This is your first time seeing him in action. It makes your heart beat out of your chest. There’s this ache like you should be inside with him, cables connected to both of you, tucked neatly inside of Blue together. 
It doesn’t take him long to get his opponent on their back, the heavy thump against the floor jostling the ant-like figures on the ground below, handlers waiting for their pilots to finish. It goes on like this for a while, his training, using different methods of combat and winning each time. He’s amazing, and you can tell why his reputation is the way it is, second only to Tenko, who you have yet to see in action. 
When he finishes his last session, you watch Blue walk to the edge of the room, and Touya emerges from her chest, jumping the long way down her body without any issue. You watch as he looks toward the window you’re behind. He waves at you, an acknowledgment of your presence, and you wave back, though you aren’t sure he can actually see you.
It’s the beginning of everything for the two of you. You think Tenko was right.
He lets you stay with him afterwards while he does maintenance on Blue. He helps you climb up the path to her chest, hauling you over the edge to sit inside with him. He turns around abruptly, holding a hand up before allowing you to walk any further.
“Do not touch anything.” He warns, completely serious, before letting his hand fall and allowing you further into the cockpit. You take in your surroundings, the guts of his machine, analyzing the different control panels and screens that line the interior. You can tell he takes good care of her, and he spends a lot of time in here. It looks lived in, stickers stuck to metal plating and pieces of him all over. He’s made a second home in between the ribs of his mech. You feel a little jealous, though you aren’t sure of what. 
The two of you sit against the left side of Blue’s interior, waiting for her updates to finish, the loading screen on each of her monitors display a fire graphic that grows with the increasing percentage on screen. Between you and Touya sits an opened bag of sour gummies, which Touya picks out the lemon flavor and drops the candy in your palm with each new handful he gathers. 
“How do you know all this stuff?” He questions around a mouthful of sour cherry, “Like, the real names for things, where stuff goes, how to fix them. That day with the wires…”
“I spent a lot of time around mechanics at UA, and then also at the PLF.” You explain, picking the yellow colored candy from his open palm as you speak. “I couldn’t connect with other handlers. I didn’t like how they thought, or how they viewed the pilot/handler relationship. Mechanics were mostly neutral, and they loved these machines like nothing else. They reminded me of why I joined UA in the first place.”
“Hm.” He nods, thinking about your past. “Well, I guess if you spent so much time around actual professionals…I could maybe use your help sometimes in the garage.”
“Really?” You question excitedly, a spark lighting up your eyes as you swerve your head toward him. He feels something tight in his chest at the sight.
“Yes, but only on the outside. I don’t want you messing with her insides, yet.” He establishes. “And never alone. I have to be there at all times.”
“Of course, yes, oh my god. Touya!” You smile, gripping his shoulder firmly, a gesture of thanks, communication of how much his trust means to you. “I’ll be so careful with her, I promise.”
“Yeah, well, you have no other choice.” He shrugs, throwing another pile of candy in his mouth. “I’ll kill you if anything happens to her.”
You take the threat seriously, but his heart isn’t in it. He’s realized that you’ve wormed your way into his life and he hadn’t even noticed just how entangled you were now. 
As the weeks go by, you spend a lot more time together. You work on blue together, and you rest inside of her chest, sometimes allowing yourself to drift off against his shoulder on especially tiring days. He sits beside you in the caf, and while he doesn’t always say much, the feeling of his arm against yours is comforting. You can tell people are starting to notice, and they’re starting to talk. You’re being dubbed someone who’s tamed him, but you know how far from the truth that is. 
Despite your differences and the petty arguments that come up when Touya feels like you’re intruding on his independence, you’re growing attached. You wonder if he is, too.
Spending time together in the garage becomes the new normal for the two of you. Being in each other’s dorms feels far too intimate, so you always meet in the garage. This way, one of you is always busy doing something with your hands. There’s no room for any strange feelings in the pit of your stomach to seep in. 
You sit in the crook of Blue’s neck, watching Touya as he repairs the lenses in her “eyes.” Blue has three pairs of eyes; in her head, her chest, and down near her hips, which all footage is projected onto monitors inside the cockpit so that Touya has a full view of what’s in front of him. 
He’s so peaceful while he works, you’ve noticed, almost like he goes somewhere else completely. It’s a part of him you don’t think many people get to see, a piece of him just for you, and you want to be selfish with it.
“Can I ask you something?” You question, leaning your head back against the metal. “But you can’t get mad.”
He looks up at you, still fiddling with a lens, a mocking look on his face. “I’m not making any promises.”
You take a deep breath, preparing yourself for the possible fallout of the question you’re about to ask, “What do you think about the soul link?”
“No.” He shakes his head. “I’d never do it.”
You nod your head in understanding, “yeah, I get it. It’s weird, right? The idea that someone else would be inside your brain.”
“It’s fucking invasive.” He says.
“You know, at UA it always felt like a threat, you know. Like, it was a way for a handler to control their pilot, not a tool or a bond like it should be.” You begin, thinking back to how you viewed the soul link back then. You didn’t like how the bond was presented as this power that a handler holds over their pilot, a threat to keep their pilot in line. But, you could understand how the link could be used for good. “But since coming here, I can tell it’s not all bad. People trust each other here. I mean, there’s obviously some people who abuse it, but, for the most part, everyone seems to understand what it really means to be a pilot and a handler.”
You’re mostly just thinking out loud, but Touya doesn’t say anything to your ramblings. He continues to work on the lenses, and you can gather that he doesn’t want to talk about the subject anymore. But you can’t let it go, yet. There’s something you’ve been worried about since you met him.
“And what about…your brain? They say when a handler and a pilot don’t complete the soul link, the pilot will eventually fry their brain.” You can’t help it. You think about it all the time, what will happen when he can’t take it anymore. The closer you get to him, the realer it feels. “Are you ever worried about that?”
He looks at you, an expression you can’t quite make out fall across his face as he stares. It’s almost soft, the way he looks at you in this moment. “You don’t have to worry about me.”
The truth is, this is a reality Touya has accepted. He’s not afraid to die, and he never has been. He’ll probably die inside of Blue, and he has no problem with that fact. He doesn’t need to be around for long, just enough to show his dad what he’s capable of.
“C’mon.” You stare. “That’s not fair.”
“Shit. I left some of the screws for this in my dorm.” He curses. He looks where you lounge, tucked into Blue’s shoulder. “Keep an eye on her, okay?”
You watch him jump down, much higher than his usual height at her chest, but he lands anyway. He doesn’t turn to look back at you as he jogs away. You climb up the side of Blue, and look at the lenses in her head. They’re already repaired, and you know Touya used the excuse of missing screw just so he wouldn’t have to talk about the soul link.
But it’s the first time he’s ever left you alone with Blue before. 
As the mission draws closer, Touya throws himself into training. You’re on the training floor with him most days, standing behind that big glass panel as you watch him spar with his peers. He still doesn’t let you down on the floor with him until he’s full out of Blue and close enough to the edge of the sparring floor to get to you. You’re not allowed in the actual training area, and even though he says he doesn’t want you clinging to him, it’s really because he wants to keep you safe. Seeing your human body near the giant machines that are HERO’s makes him want to grab you and keep you inside of Blue’s chest forever. 
You can tell all the training is taking a toll on him. With an excess of headaches and the occasional nosebleed, you continuously get into arguments about him cutting back on training inside of Blue. There are other ways for him to prepare that don’t involve his fragile brain being hooked up to an entity that takes so much. He doesn’t listen.
Later and later into the night, as your fellow pilots and handlers disperse and return to their rooms to sleep, Touya stays inside of Blue, testing her movements and sparring against test dummies and obstacles. Once you and Touya are the only two left on the sparring floor, you speak into the intercom attached to your head.
“Touya, I think you should take a break.” You tell him, “It’s late. Get some rest and then we can pick it back up in the morning.”
There’s a pause, then, “I’m gonna stay for another hour. Get some sleep. I’ll be done soon.”
“No, Touya. You’ve been at it for hours. You barely took a break for dinner. C’mon.” 
“You know, you sound awfully like a handler trying to tell their pilot what to do.” He teases, but you can hear the irritation in his voice.
“You are insufferable. I’m worried about you.” You groan.
“I’m fine. Go sleep.” He insists.
“If I find out you aren’t out of here in an hour—” Your line is promptly cut off, leaving behind static in your ear. You sigh and throw your com to the side. You hope he’s telling the truth.
With one last look at Blue, you make your way out of the training floor and find your way back to your dorm. 
Touya doesn’t answer the door when you knock the next morning. With a frustrated groan, you leave your dorm and head to the training floor, assuming he woke up early to get some extra hours in. The closer you get the the floor, you notice other members of the base rushing in front of you. Feeling panicked, you pick up the pace, jogging toward the training room to make sure something isn’t wrong. You collide with a body in front of you, nearly falling to the floor as you steady yourself. Toga stands in front of you, her cheeks red and eyes glossy as she explains something your mind can’t catch up to understand. The only thing you recognize is his name, and you’re running toward the training floor in an instant. 
You watch as Blue stomps around the area, her arms swinging in all directions, losing her footing as she moves. Knowing you can’t do anything on the floor, you make your way up to the overlook, finding Tenko yelling into your intercom. 
“What’s going on? What’s happening?” You ask him, pulling the headset off of his head and placing it on yours instead. 
“He’s out of fucking control. He won’t answer. I don’t even think he’s conscious in there.” He tells you, running a hand through his hair, pulling at the roots in anxiety. “You’re not linked yet, are you?”
You shake your head, closing your eyes in frustration as you try to think. You know it’s the only way. You have to take some of the burden off of him, make him share it with you. It’s the only way he’ll survive right now. “Do you think you can get into Decay right now and knock him down somehow?”
He hesitates, “I can get inside. I can’t guarantee I’ll be able to touch him at all.”
“You have to.” You plead, desperately. “I just need him down for ten seconds, tops. As long as I can get inside of her, I can save him.”
He looks at you like you’re insane, and maybe you are. But you know you can’t live with yourself if you don’t try something. Tenko nods.
“I can do it.” He tells you. You rush passed him, following the stairs down to the training area. You feel Tenk grab your wrist firmly. “You bring him back, okay?”
“I will.” You nod. 
He dodges Blue’s movements, weaving between her legs as he finally makes it to Decay. It takes a few moments for him to connect, but he goes straight for Blue. You watch the giant machines fight one another, but it’s clear that Blue’s lack of control hinders much of her ability. She needs Touya just as much as he needs her. It’s tough for Decay to dodge her swinging arms, but Tenko manages to knock her down quickly.
The fall shakes the room, but you waste no time running for Blue. Climbing over the side of her, you manage to touch your thumb to the pad on the outside to open her chest up. She begins to stand up, and you slip down, grabbing onto a bar beneath her ribcage. You let out a frustrated groan as you try to pull yourself up over the edge of the cockpit. Finally making it over, you see Touya sitting there, still connected to his pilot’s chair, eyes glazed over and blood gushing from his nose. You push the button that closes the panel in Blue’s chest, and you’re suddenly alone with him. 
Touya’s body is being jerked around by the movement of the mech, and you hang onto the walls of her chest in order to make your way to him. You situate yourself in his lap, taking his head in your hands as you look at him with tears in your eyes.
“You fucking asshole! I told you to take a break.” You sob, resting your head against his as you try and think of what to do next. “Touya, please. Please, baby, I need to you come back. Just fucking come back so I don’t have to do this without your permission, please.”
With no response from him, you wipe your tears, coming to terms with the fact that you have to complete the soul link now, or he’ll die. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry, Touya. Please forgive me.”
The soul link isn’t exactly an action so much as it is a feeling, an experience. There’s no trigger for it, no way to make it happen. It just begins. 
It’s Touya, aged thirteen, wild, chubby-cheeked and happy, in the pilot’s seat of his father’s HERO. It’s his drive, his determination, his anger, his hurt. It’s the day he snuck into battle, the day he couldn’t get out, flesh burning and fusing to the metal walls of his mech, the feeling now deep in your skin. It’s you, aged fifteen, hopeful, alive, shaking hands with your first pilot. It’s your heart, much too big and much too open for your line of work, it’s your passion, your fire, every piece of you that was broken down again and again until there was nothing left. It’s Touya and it’s you, and every single bit of your souls now tied together in one big knot. 
There’s nothing but darkness. And then there’s screaming. And then you can hear everything. Every thought running through Touya’s brain right now echoes in your head as you slowly come back to yourself. He can hear the same of yours.
It’s overwhelming at first, to have two sets of thoughts in your head at the same time, but you manage to focus. You can feel an anger inside of you like you’ve never felt. It’s almost like it’s your own. You need to come back. You’ve lost control of Blue.
In an instant, you feel yourself come back to your body, now straddling Touya like before, you feel his arms shoot around you and he tucks his chin over your shoulder to pilot Blue like he’s used to doing. He pays no mind as he presses up against you, but you feel your heart rate increase at the closeness. 
He’s so close.
I have to be. You’re in my lap.
Shit. I didn’t think—
Clearly.
I can’t fucking believe you. I told you we weren’t going to do this.
You were dying!
Then you fucking let me!
You’re jostled around in his lap for a moment as he stops Blue from destroying any more of the training floor, and Touya wraps an arm around your waist, holding you steady.
He gains control of her quickly, moving her toward the edge of the room. You tuck your face into his neck, not wanting to distract him and keeping your thoughts at bay so you don’t overwhelm him. He powers Blue down, severing the neural connection between the two of you, and shoves you from his lap and into the pilot’s chair like you’ve burned him. He storms out of the cockpit, climbing out of his machine and leaving you inside. You think about the argument you had within each other’s head, how Touya would have rather died than be linked to you like he is now. 
You slump against the seat, comforted by the metal cage you’ve been left inside of. 
229 notes · View notes
slamminslamminmcgill · 4 months ago
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i’m so glad y’all like how i write dialogue for deadpool cause i got more thoughts abt him fingering you. he loves t-dick and transmasc pussy and i put that on GOD!!!
him shoving his hand down your pants and trying to figure out what’s going on. he cups your crotch over your underwear, his thumb flicking across your itty bitty t-cock. he somehow doesn’t suspect a thing. “jesus, mary, and fucking joseph, i know i called you a tiny-dick twerp in theory, but this is just upsetting in practice. feels like i’m laughing at the mean comments on instagram reels. y’know, the kind where those mommy influencers exploit their children for views and—OH!” he swipes down the seam of your cunt, and it all finally dawns on him. “well, well, WELL, aren’t you just full of surprises, pretty boy?! gimme about 15 minutes and you could be full of cum, too, if that’s what your heart desires. oh! also! what do you like to call it? pussy? kitty? cunt? front? hole? snatch? hoo-ha? baby cave? penis fly-trap?”
he finally rips your underwear off and gets to explore you, gloves on skin.
“aw, for fuck’s sake, honey, you’re soaking wet ALREADY? tell me i’m not your first. or maybe you’re just easily excited? that’s honestly such a blessing for my ego though. i’m very flattered. truly. could i really just… slip some in already?”
“ahh—ha, fuck! fuck!!!”
almost as loud as you, wade gasps at how wet and silky, lush and inviting your cunt feels. part of him REALLY wants to just cut to the chase and fuck you right now. but that’d be rude. it’s his first time. he’s just been invited in. he needs a tour of the house.
“UGH, c’mon, stop it, how are you THIS fucking wet in here? i always thought that T must turn your cunt into the goddamn mojave but YOU…” he GROWLS and hooks his fingers into you, so perfectly into you, it feels like he’s pierced into your spinal cord. like he’s just rolling your central nervous system between his digits, “YOU are something else, juicy-cuntoure.”
then the motherfucker starts twisting them. scissoring them inside you and stretching out your insides.
“what’s your thing, the konami code?” he jokes, mapping it on your plush and squishy walls. “up up, down down, left right, left right, B A start? or are you more gta san andreas? R1, R2, X… no, wait, shit, what was it?” then he abandons the pattern, and just starts button mashing. he never abandons the bit though, he’ll just yap to himself even as you lose your fucking mind on his hand. “shit, c’mon, the rocket launcher, that’s an essential! i should have that one memorized! you NEED that to shoot at the police cars whenever they’re on screen! where was i? oh. yeah. knuckle deep in some little faggot. average weeknight for me. you wanna get nachos after this? maybe i could eat your ass in the bathroom at applebees?”
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319 notes · View notes
wonyowonyo · 4 months ago
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Sanctuary (H. Yunjin X M! Reader)
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Hello there again! Another lsrfm fic by yours truly. This one is a request by (@dav1233555) that was long overdue, so once again I apologize for taking too long! And that also apply to other requests that are currently queued hehe, apologies for the long wait as I'm currently busy with other stuff going on! Anyways, enough about yapping; this one was abt 4.3k words, hope yall enjoy! I'll see yall on the next one. wonyo out!
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As the sun began to set on the bustling streets of Seoul, Huh Yunjin, a member of the popular K-pop girl group Le Sserafim, couldn't help but feel a mix of exhaustion and excitement coursing through her veins. She had just finished a grueling practice session with her group, her muscles aching from the hours of intense choreography and vocal training, but the thought of spending the evening with her beloved boyfriend, Y/n, was all the motivation she needed to push through the fatigue.
Yunjin's eyes scanned the crowded street as she walked out of the practice studio, searching for the familiar face of her partner. It didn't take long for her gaze to land on Y/n, who was waiting for her by their car, a bright smile lighting up his features. Yunjin felt her heart skip a beat at the sight of him, and she quickened her pace, desperate to reach him.
"Hey, love," Y/n said, his voice warm and inviting as he opened the car door for her. "You look stunning, as always."
Yunjin couldn't help but blush at his compliment, playfully rolling her eyes as she slid into the passenger seat. "You're biased, but I'll take the compliment," she teased, her lips curving into a smile.
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The drive to the beach was a familiar one, a route they had taken countless times before, but the excitement Yunjin felt was still palpable. She had been looking forward to this evening all week, the thought of spending some much-needed quality time with Y/n just what she needed to unwind and recharge.
As they arrived at the secluded spot along the coastline, the sound of the waves crashing against the shore and the warm, salty breeze immediately put Yunjin at ease. She slipped off her shoes, feeling the soft sand between her toes, and walked hand in hand with Y/n along the shoreline, their fingers intertwined.
The sky was painted with hues of pink and orange as the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm, golden glow over the ocean and the surrounding landscape. Yunjin couldn't help but feel a sense of serenity wash over her, like she was exactly where she was meant to be.
She turned to Y/n, who was watching her with a look of pure adoration, and Yunjin felt her heart swell with emotion.
"I'm so grateful for this, for us," she whispered, her voice barely audible above the sound of the waves.
Y/n's eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled back at her, his grip on her hand tightening ever so slightly. "I'm grateful for you, Yunjin. You're the sunshine that brightens up my day, every day."
As the stars began to twinkle in the night sky, Yunjin and Y/n decided to head back to his cozy apartment, where they spent the rest of the evening cuddled up on the couch, watching their favorite TV shows and sharing snacks.
At one point, Y/n turned to Yunjin, his expression almost wistful. "Hey, can I ask you something?"
Yunjin looked up at him, her eyes sparkling with curiosity. "Anything, love."
"Do you remember the first time we met, at that music festival years ago?" Y/n asked, a faraway look in his eyes.
Yunjin's face lit up with a smile, the memory of that fateful day flooding her mind. "How could I forget? You were so awkward and charming, I couldn't help but be drawn to you."
Y/n chuckled, a faint blush creeping up his cheeks. "I was so nervous, I think I stuttered through our entire conversation."
"But you still managed to ask for my number," Yunjin teased, playfully nudging him with her elbow.
"I knew from that moment that I wanted to spend more time with you," Y/n said, his voice filled with sincerity. "And now, here we are, living our best lives together."
Yunjin's heart swelled with emotion as she looked at Y/n, her gaze filled with adoration and affection. She knew that their relationship wasn't without its challenges – the K-pop industry was notorious for its demanding schedules and intense scrutiny – but in this moment, she felt like they could conquer anything as long as they had each other.
As they continued to watch TV, Yunjin snuggled deeper into Y/n's embrace, feeling his warmth and comfort envelop her like a gentle hug. She knew that this was where she was meant to be – in his arms, surrounded by love and support.
The night wore on, and the TV show they were watching faded into the background as they began to open up to each other, sharing their hopes and dreams, their fears and vulnerabilities. It was one of those heart-to-heart conversations that only happened when you felt completely safe and trusted with someone.
"I'm scared, Y/n," Yunjin confessed, her voice barely above a whisper. "I'm scared of not being able to balance my career and our relationship. The demands of this industry are so relentless, and I worry that I won't have enough time or energy to devote to us."
Y/n held her tighter, his grip reassuring and comforting. "We'll figure it out together, love. We've made it this far, and I know we can face anything as long as we have each other. Your career is important, but so are you, and I'll always be here to support you, no matter what."
Yunjin felt a wave of relief wash over her, her worries slowly dissipating as Y/n's words sank in. She knew that he was right – they had weathered the storms of her demanding idol life before, and they would do it again, side by side.
As the night drew to a close, Yunjin felt a sense of peace wash over her. She knew that she wasn't alone in this journey, that Y/n would always be there to support her, to love her, and to cherish her.
In this moment, surrounded by the silence of the night, Yunjin knew that their love was pure, true, and strong enough to overcome any obstacle that came their way.
————————————————————
The next morning, Yunjin woke up feeling refreshed and energized, the fatigue from the previous day's practice session a distant memory. As she stretched her limbs, she couldn't help but glance over at Y/n, who was still sleeping peacefully beside her, his features soft and relaxed.
Yunjin reached out and gently brushed a stray lock of hair from his forehead, a tender smile playing on her lips. She loved these quiet moments, when she could simply observe Y/n and bask in the warmth of his presence.
Suddenly, Y/n's eyes fluttered open, and he greeted Yunjin with a sleepy smile. "Good morning, my love," he murmured, his voice thick with sleep.
"Good morning," Yunjin whispered back, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his lips. "Did you sleep well?"
Y/n nodded, his arms wrapping around Yunjin's waist as he pulled her closer. "Mhm, better than I have in a while. Having you by my side makes all the difference."
Yunjin snuggled into his embrace, relishing the feeling of being surrounded by his comforting warmth. "I'm so grateful for that, for us," she murmured, her fingers tracing patterns on his chest.
Y/n pressed a gentle kiss to the top of her head, his lips lingering for a moment. "And I'm grateful for you, Yunjin. You bring so much light and joy into my life, and I can't imagine it without you."
They lay there in comfortable silence for a few moments, simply enjoying each other's presence and the tranquility of the morning. Yunjin could feel the tension slowly leaving her body, replaced by a sense of contentment and peace.
Eventually, they reluctantly dragged themselves out of bed, knowing that Yunjin had a busy day ahead of her. As they prepared for the day, Yunjin couldn't help but feel a twinge of anxiety at the thought of returning to the demanding schedule of her idol life.
Sensing her unease, Y/n reached out and gently squeezed her hand. "Hey, it's going to be okay. I know it's not easy, but we'll get through this together, like we always do."
Yunjin gave him a grateful smile, her fingers intertwining with his. "I know, and I'm thankful to have you by my side. You always know just what to say to make me feel better."
They shared a final, lingering kiss before heading out the door, Yunjin's heart feeling a little lighter and her steps a little more sure. As she made her way to the practice studio, she couldn't help but reflect on how lucky she was to have someone like Y/n in her life – a partner who understood the demands of her career, who supported her unconditionally, and who made her feel loved and cherished, no matter what.
The day was long and grueling, with endless hours of rehearsals, vocal training, and choreography. Yunjin's body ached, her muscles protesting with each movement, but she pushed through, fueled by her determination and the thought of seeing Y/n again later that evening.
As she finally stepped out of the practice studio, Yunjin felt a sense of relief wash over her. The sun was beginning to set, casting a warm, golden glow over the city, and the familiar sight of Y/n's car waiting for her was a welcome sight.
"Hey, love," Y/n said, a bright smile on his face as he opened the car door for her. "You look exhausted, but as beautiful as ever."
Yunjin couldn't help but chuckle, the tension in her shoulders easing as she slid into the passenger seat. "You always know just what to say to make me feel better."
The drive back to Y/n's apartment was filled with comfortable conversation, Yunjin sharing the highlights and challenges of her day while Y/n listened attentively, offering words of encouragement and support whenever she needed them.
As they arrived at their destination, Yunjin felt a sense of relief wash over her. This place, Y/n's cozy home, had become a sanctuary for her, a safe haven where she could truly be herself, away from the prying eyes of the public and the demands of her idol life.
"I don't know what I'd do without this place," Yunjin murmured, her gaze sweeping over the familiar surroundings as they stepped inside.
Y/n wrapped his arms around her from behind, pressing a gentle kiss to her temple. "And I don't know what I'd do without you, my love. This place is our haven, our refuge, and I'm so grateful to share it with you."
They settled onto the plush sofa, Yunjin snuggling into Y/n's embrace as they turned on the TV, the soft glow of the screen casting a warm light on their faces. Yunjin felt her muscles begin to relax, the tension slowly melting away as she allowed herself to be enveloped in Y/n's comforting presence.
As they flipped through the channels, Yunjin suddenly remembered their conversation from the previous night, the one where she had confessed her fears about balancing her career and their relationship.
"Y/n?" she began, her voice soft and tentative.
"Hmm?" he hummed in response, his fingers gently tracing patterns on her arm.
"About what I said last night… I want you to know that I'm truly grateful for your support. I know it can't be easy, dealing with the demands of my idol life, but you've always been there for me, no matter what."
Y/n pulled her closer, his grip reassuring. "Yunjin, you don't ever have to thank me for that. I love you, and I'll always be here to support you, no matter what challenges we face. We're in this together, remember?"
Yunjin felt a lump form in her throat, overwhelmed by the depth of Y/n's love and devotion. "I love you too, so much. I don't know what I'd do without you."
They fell into a comfortable silence, simply enjoying each other's company and the warmth of their embrace. Yunjin knew that as long as she had Y/n by her side, she could face anything the world threw her way.
As the evening wore on, they decided to order in some of their favorite takeout, filling the apartment with the enticing aromas of their favorite dishes. Yunjin's stomach growled in anticipation, and Y/n couldn't help but chuckle at the sound.
"Looks like someone's hungry," he teased, pressing a playful kiss to the tip of her nose.
Yunjin playfully swatted at him, her lips curved into a smile. "Well, maybe if someone didn't keep distracting me from eating, I wouldn't be so hungry."
Y/n raised his hands in mock surrender, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "My apologies, my love. I'll be sure to let you enjoy your meal in peace."
They settled in to enjoy their dinner, their conversation flowing effortlessly as they recounted the highlights of their day and made plans for the weekend. Yunjin couldn't help but marvel at how seamlessly their lives had become intertwined, how every moment she spent with Y/n felt like coming home.
As they finished their meal, Yunjin leaned back into the couch, letting out a content sigh. "I don't know how I'd get through this without you, Y/n. You always know how to make me feel better, no matter what."
Y/n reached out and gently tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear, his touch feather-light and tender. "And I'll always be here, Yunjin, to support you, to hold you, and to love you, no matter what. We're in this together, remember?"
Yunjin felt a surge of emotion wash over her, and she leaned in, pressing her lips to Y/n's in a deep, passionate kiss. In that moment, she knew that as long as she had him by her side, she could face anything the world threw her way.
As the night drew to a close, Yunjin and Y/n cuddled up on the couch, their limbs tangled together as they watched the stars twinkle outside the window. Yunjin felt a sense of peace wash over her, her worries and anxieties from the day melting away.
"You know," Y/n began, his voice barely above a whisper, "I remember the first time we met, at that music festival all those years ago. I was so nervous, I could barely string two words together."
Yunjin chuckled, the memory bringing a smile to her face. "And yet, you still managed to ask for my number. I was so charmed by your awkward charm, I couldn't say no."
Y/n pulled her closer, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. "I knew from that moment that I wanted to spend more time with you, to get to know you better. And now, here we are, building a life together, facing the world side by side."
Yunjin felt her heart swell with emotion, overwhelmed by the depth of the love they shared. "I'm so grateful for you, Y/n. For your unwavering support, your patience, and your love. I don't know what I'd do without you in my life."
"And I'll always be here, Yunjin," Y/n murmured, his fingers gently tracing the outline of her face. "Through the good times and the bad, the highs and the lows. We'll face it all, together."
As the night wore on, Yunjin and Y/n continued to share their dreams, their fears, and their hopes for the future, their conversation flowing effortlessly. Yunjin felt a sense of security and belonging that she had never experienced before, and she knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, she would face them with Y/n by her side.
As the first rays of dawn began to peek through the curtains, Yunjin snuggled deeper into Y/n's embrace, feeling the weight of her exhaustion slowly dissipate. She knew that the coming days would be filled with demanding schedules and intense scrutiny, but in this moment, she felt a sense of peace and contentment that she hadn't felt in a long time.
Yunjin pressed a tender kiss to Y/n's cheek, her voice barely above a whisper. "I love you, Y/n. Thank you for being my safe haven, my rock, in this crazy world."
Y/n's arms tightened around her, his lips curving into a warm smile. "I love you too, Yunjin. Always and forever."
With the sun rising on a new day, Yunjin felt a renewed sense of determination and strength. With Y/n by her side, she knew that she could face anything the world threw her way. Together, they would navigate the challenges of her idol life, their love a beacon that would guide them through the storms.
————————————————————
As the morning light streamed in through the window, Yunjin slowly opened her eyes, relishing the warmth of Y/n's embrace. She traced the contours of his face with her fingertips, marveling at how peaceful and serene he looked in his sleep.
Carefully, Yunjin disentangled herself from his grasp, not wanting to disturb his much-needed rest. She padded quietly into the kitchen, the soft patter of her feet on the hardwood floor the only sound breaking the stillness of the apartment.
Yunjin set about preparing a simple breakfast of toast, scrambled eggs, and freshly brewed coffee – Y/n's favorite. As she cooked, the tantalizing aroma of the food filled the air, making her own stomach rumble in anticipation.
When the meal was ready, Yunjin carried the tray back to the bedroom, the corners of her lips curving into a gentle smile as she watched Y/n begin to stir. His eyes fluttered open, and he greeted her with a sleepy grin.
"Good morning, my love," Yunjin said softly, placing the tray on the bedside table and settling back down next to him.
"Morning," Y/n murmured, his voice still thick with sleep. He reached out and pulled Yunjin close, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead. "You're up early."
Yunjin nodded, her fingers tracing lazy patterns on his chest. "I wanted to surprise you with breakfast. You've been working so hard to support me, and I wanted to do something special for you."
Y/n's eyes softened, and he cupped her face in his hands, his thumb gently caressing her cheek. "You're too good to me, Yunjin. I don't know what I did to deserve you, but I'm grateful every single day."
They ate their breakfast in comfortable silence, savoring the simple pleasure of each other's company. Yunjin couldn't help but notice the way Y/n's eyes followed her every move, the adoration and affection in his gaze making her heart swell with emotion.
As they finished their meal, Yunjin reached out and intertwined their fingers, her expression suddenly serious. "Y/n, I want you to know that I'm fully committed to making this work – to balancing my career and our relationship. I know it hasn't been easy, but you've been by my side every step of the way, and I'm truly grateful for that."
Y/n squeezed her hand reassuringly, his lips curving into a warm smile. "I know, Yunjin. And I want you to know that I'll always be here, no matter what. Your dreams and your passions are a part of who you are, and I love every single aspect of you."
Yunjin felt a lump form in her throat, the depth of his love and acceptance overwhelming her. "I love you, Y/n. More than you could ever know."
They shared a tender, lingering kiss, their bodies molding together as if they were made for each other. Yunjin knew that with Y/n by her side, she could conquer anything that came her way.
As the morning wore on, Yunjin couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement and anticipation for the day ahead. She had a busy schedule, with rehearsals, photo shoots, and interviews lined up, but she knew that she was ready to face it all with renewed vigor.
Y/n, sensing her energy, gently squeezed her hand. "You've got this, Yunjin. Just remember to take care of yourself, okay? I'll be here, waiting for you, whenever you need a break."
Yunjin nodded, a grateful smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "I know, and I can't thank you enough for that. You're my rock, Y/n, and I don't know what I'd do without you."
As Yunjin prepared to leave, Y/n pulled her into a tight embrace, his lips pressing a lingering kiss to the top of her head. "I love you, Yunjin. Always and forever."
Yunjin savored the moment, committing the feel of his arms around her and the warmth of his touch to memory. "I love you too, Y/n. See you tonight?"
Y/n nodded, his eyes sparkling with affection. "Absolutely. I'll be here, waiting for you."
With one final kiss, Yunjin reluctantly headed out the door, her steps lighter and her heart filled with a renewed sense of purpose. As she made her way to the practice studio, she couldn't help but feel a surge of gratitude and love for the man who had become her safe haven, her rock, in this crazy world.
The day was long and grueling, as Yunjin had expected, but she pushed through, fueled by the knowledge that Y/n was waiting for her, ready to offer his unwavering support and love. Each time she felt her energy waning, she would think of him, of the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled, of the warmth of his embrace, and she would find the strength to carry on.
When Yunjin finally stepped out of the practice studio, a wave of exhaustion washed over her. Her muscles ached, and her voice was hoarse from hours of vocal training, but the sight of Y/n's familiar car waiting for her instantly lifted her spirits.
As she slid into the passenger seat, Y/n greeted her with a warm smile, his eyes filled with concern. "You look exhausted, my love. How was your day?"
Yunjin let out a weary sigh, leaning her head back against the headrest. "It was long, but I made it through. I'm just glad to be here with you now."
Y/n reached out and gently squeezed her hand, his touch soothing and comforting. "I'm proud of you, Yunjin. You're incredible, you know that?"
Yunjin felt a blush creep up her cheeks, and she couldn't help but smile. "I couldn't do it without you, Y/n. You're my strength, my inspiration, and I'm so grateful to have you by my side."
The drive back to the apartment was a quiet one, but Yunjin didn't mind. She was content to simply bask in Y/n's presence, to feel the warmth of his hand in hers and the steady rhythm of his breathing.
As they stepped through the front door, Yunjin felt a wave of relief wash over her. This place, their haven, was a sanctuary where she could let down her guard and just be herself, without the constant scrutiny and demands of the outside world.
Y/n, sensing her tension, gently guided her towards the bedroom, his touch featherlight and soothing. "Come on, love. Let's get you into a hot bath and then we can order in some of your favorite food, okay?"
Yunjin nodded gratefully, her body practically sagging with exhaustion. "That sounds perfect, Y/n. Thank you."
As she sank into the steaming water, Yunjin felt the tension slowly leaving her body, her muscles unwinding with each passing minute. The familiar scent of her favorite bath products filled the air, and she couldn't help but feel a sense of calm wash over her.
Yunjin closed her eyes, allowing her mind to drift, and found herself thinking about the future – about the challenges and triumphs that lay ahead, and about the unwavering support she had in Y/n.
She knew that the road ahead would not be an easy one, that the demands of her idol life would continue to test the limits of her strength and resilience. But with Y/n by her side, Yunjin felt like she could conquer anything.
As she emerged from the bathroom, refreshed and rejuvenated, Yunjin found Y/n waiting for her, a warm smile on his face. He pulled her into a gentle embrace, his fingers gently tracing patterns on her back.
"Feeling better?" he murmured, his breath tickling her ear.
Yunjin nodded, her arms tightening around his waist. "Much better, thanks to you."
They settled onto the couch, cuddled up together as they enjoyed their dinner and watched a mindless TV show. Yunjin couldn't help but feel a sense of contentment and peace wash over her, her worries and anxieties from the day slowly melting away.
As the night drew to a close, Yunjin turned to Y/n, her eyes shining with affection. "Y/n, I don't know what I'd do without you. You're my everything, and I'm so grateful to have you in my life."
Y/n pulled her close, his lips pressing a tender kiss to her forehead. "And I'm grateful for you, Yunjin. You're the light of my life, and I'll always be here, no matter what challenges we face."
They held each other in comfortable silence, their heartbeats in sync as they basked in the warmth of their love. Yunjin knew that with Y/n by her side, she could face anything the world threw her way, and she couldn't wait to continue building their life together, one filled with love, laughter, and unwavering support.
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puppyeared · 7 months ago
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who up seeing their disorder in a fictional character but feel like its not their place to put a name on it
#id have to be waterboarded before i can talk abt how i see a lot of my adhd and personality in mitsumi iwakura let alone post it#idk how to talk abt this without feeling like im talking over or invalidating ppls experiences relating with a character#someone was talking abt how ppl tie laios' autism to special interest and social difficulties but not much else which kinda flattens it#and then went into a respectful in depth analysis of other autistic behaviour that laios exhibits and it wasnt phrased meanly#its fascinating and important to me to hear someone explain a little bit abt traits that they recognized and often go overlooked#because it does help me learn more about it. but i think thats also where hesitancy kicks in when it comes to depicting it accurately#like i have adhd and some of my adhd symptoms overlap with autism (time blindness and pattern seeking behaviour) but that only means#it feels familiar to me even without having autism. on top of that traits arent always cleanly determined as being /caused/ by#a disorder. to understand my environment i compare it to something unrelated but similar to make it more familiar and for the longest time#i thought that was a personality thing and not an information processing thing since i loved playing pretend in my head as a kid#so if you make a character who experiences that hoping to reach people that also experience that and tell them its not weird or#smth youre making up like. thats the goal. ppl who dont get it arent expected to it just means it doesnt cater to them but it helps them#become familiar to it yk? since i dont have autism myself i dont feel confident i can depict it properly or explain it in my own words#but that doesnt mean im trying to dismiss it or try and cut it out completely.. ill just leave the floor open to someone who /can/#a lot of issues around fanon depictions are when smth is baselessly popularized or a characters personality and behavior is flattened#especially to fit them into a trending meme. its harmless and its supposed to be for fun but it gets tricky when you drag things that#need to be carefully explained beforehand or else it gets lost in translation. like that tweet abt 'hyperfixating' on cooking pasta#once it becomes popular language usually the original meaning is left out for the sake of simplifying it for everyone that when it#circles back theres a sort of hesitancy like. am i using it the way it was intended or am i unknowingly using the popularized version of it#actually thats probably why i felt wrongfooted during diagnosis bc it felt like i was misusing the words i heard to describe what i felt#i /know/ i see a lot of myself in mitsumi because our minds are always somewhere else and we tend to put good faith first and for me#that personal connection is enough. but idk it feels like its always gonna have to be 'palatable' first before i can talk abt it openly#mad respect to writers and creators who stick to their story even if theres the looming fear of ppl misinterpreting it and letting them#have it.. its been almost 2 weeks and i am so close to deleting that m3 dunmeshi drawing bc ppl keep saying chilchuck wouldnt have 200 HP#IT LITERALLY SAYS I MADE IT WHILE WATCHING EP 1. I USED EARTHBOUND LOGIC AND I WASNT EVEN TAKING IT SERIOUSLY CHILL#yapping
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dovveri · 6 months ago
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I know this request is soo Y/n-ish but if ever you can read this, please make a fic including Momo and Sana where they are fighting over y/n which is me but I prefer Momo more huehuehueheu thank yah love lotss!!
if i die young
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synopsis: you're saved by someone at work that you haven't met before and you quickly become close. your roommate isn't too fond of this though.
warnings: mostly fluff but gets vvv angsty towards the end, mentions of death, implied sex, cursing, cheating but not really if you think about it, heavy grief themes, trying so hard to not giveaway the story in the warnings
w/c: 8.4k
a/n: GIGGLE im pretty sure this is not what anon had in mind but i struggled soooo much w this prompt bcs I CANT DO THAT TO MY BABY SANA but i got this wonderful idea while in the shower to punish anon for sending me this prompt that i agonised over for a literal month that does technically fulfil the requirements 😋 enjoy the read mwahaha (and sorry for any plot holes that may come up- come yell at me in asks i have sm love for this fic and id love to yap abt it if anyone notices anything silly)
♰˚☽˚。⋆
"y/n right?"
you look up, smiling at the woman who's hovering over your desk at work, nodding in acknowledgement.
"i think the boss was asking for you."
you widen your eyes in embarrassment, scrambling up and grabbing the relevant files, "oh shit i'm so sorry i totally forgot! i'll be there in just a second!"
the woman giggles, "it's okay. i told her my dogs ate all of your work."
you pause, looking at her in horror, "i-i- you what?"
"trust me. she's met my dogs. she'll believe it. your meeting with her has been postponed to next week. i'm momo by the way." she smiles, holding out a hand expectantly.
you're still a little in shock, but you take it, noting the way her hands are soft against yours, she must moisturise. "o-oh. t-thanks i guess..."
momo grins, "see you around y/n."
and then she's off, aloof to her surroundings, you think it's kind of adorable.
you sit back at your desk, still a little flabbergasted at your interaction with the strange girl from work.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
"sana! i'm home!" you kick off your shoes, placing them in their allocated slot on your shoe rack.
"kitchen!"
you frown, immediately worried when you hear that word. sana's notorious for her clumsy nature. when you first moved in together, it was essentially an unspoken rule that she was not allowed in the kitchen without supervision.
you quickly take off your coat, rushing into the kitchen.
nothing seemed to be off when you walked in, nothing burning, no alarms ringing, no funky smells that attacked your olfactory senses, you can only hope for the best.
"y/n!" sana's bright smile gives you immediate relief. you narrow your eyes, carefully stepping around the kitchen, looking for any signs of anything wrong.
"what are you doing?"
"making sure that everything is supposed to be where it's supposed to be and nothing is broken."
"why would anything be broken?"
once you're finished with your inspection, you turn to sana, zeroing in on her and grabbing her face with your hands, squeezing her cheeks together.
it's kind of adorable when she frowns, pouting and starting to protest, but you shush her, patting her down and inspecting her face to make sure she hasn't done anything to herself or hurt herself in any way.
"okay it seems like we're safe." you let her go but she immediately latches onto you, bringing you into a hug with an airy giggle.
"i'll forgive you for thinking i burnt down our kitchen."
you roll your eyes but return her hug, only breaking away when the doorbell rings.
"i'll get it. go clean up." sana smiles sweetly, patting your butt as she moves around you towards the door.
you roll your eyes, heading into your shared bedroom, taking off your work clothes and changing into a more comfortable set of sweats and an oversized t-shirt.
when you walk back out, you see sana's set up the dining table with takeaway.
"what's this?" you smile teasingly when you sit down.
"i wanted to cook but then i thought about the last time i wanted to cook and i decided to get takeaway for us instead." she grins, "see i'm responsible! can't believe you thought i'd try anything again after last time."
"i scraped some cheese off the ceiling the other day."
"aaaand now there's no more cheese on the ceiling! problem solved!"
you both laugh, and you help her set the table, opening the takeaway boxes and beaming at the smell of tteokbokki.
once you're both settled in across from each other, content with filling your mouths with fluffy rice cakes and spicy sauce, you talk through your days.
"there was this person i've never met before at work today."
"oh?"
"yeah she was a little strange, but she was really sweet. i had forgotten that i had a meeting with the boss today and she made up some excuse about how her dogs had messed with my work and apparently the boss believed it so now i don't have to get my deadline stuff done until next week."
"that's cute. did you get her name?"
"momo i think. sounds japanese, think you know her?"
"what because all japanese people in seoul know each other?"
"i didn't mean it like thattttt!"
sana giggles, "i know i know i'm just teasing. but no i don't know her. thinking about replacing me already y/n?"
you roll your eyes, picking out a fishcake with your chopsticks and popping it in your mouth, "just waiting for the lease to end so i can finally get rid of you actually."
sana feigns offense, "good luck finding someone else who wants to sleep next to your blanket stealing ass then."
"oh you didn't know? now that i'm working a real job i can actually afford to not have to share bedrooms anymore."
"why haven't you done it yet then?"
you blush, stabbing another rice cake.
sana laughs, bright and loud, "you looooooove sleeping with me admit it."
"absolutely not."
"you doooooo you do."
"eat your food sana."
sana's laughing and you can't help but smile. her laugh was always infectious, it was the surefire way to make your day better when you were feeling a little down in the dumps, she was the epitome happiness.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
it's a few days later when you bump into momo again.
normally you make your own food to bring for lunch but today, sana had woken up sick so you had spent the morning making sure she was okay and calling in sick for her at work.
so now you were stood in line at the cafeteria, wondering just what was taking the line so long to move, your break would probably be over by the time you got to the front of the line at the pace it was going.
"i'm sorry ma'am for the last time you can't pay for your food with vouchers to baskin & robbins! if you don't move along i'll have to call security so please-"
"no you don't understand! i was told that i could use these anywhere when i won them!"
you try peeking over the shoulders of annoyed corporate soldiers and you're surprised when you catch a familiar head of raven black hair at the front of the line.
you quickly push forward, excusing yourself as people look at you in irritation.
"momo!" you call out, shoving aside a 6 foot man with blue eyes that probably worked in the finance sector.
momo turns to you, looking a little frazzled with various coupons in her hands.
"hey! what's up?" you're a little breathless from pushing in line.
she pouts, turning back to the cashier who looks like he's about to start balding from stress. "apparently i can't use these vouchers that i won at drag bingo last week."
you grab the coupons and inspect the terms and conditions. "momo these are only allowed to be used at baskin & robbins."
"but they said i could use them anywhere!"
"at any branch sweetie. not literally anywhere."
"oh... i didn't bring my wallet." she frowns, pocketing her coupons again.
"it's okay i got it." you quickly pay the cashier who looks relieved to finally get the line moving again. you pick up her tray and gesture for her to follow you to an empty table.
"you didn't have to do that y/n!"
you shrug, sitting down and sliding her tray over to her. "it's no biggie. you kinda rescued me earlier in the week anyway. i hadn't actually finished all the work i needed to get done before showing the boss. i woulda come up with some shit excuse for not finishing it so you saved my ass."
"oh don't worry about that. mina and i have been good friends since our days in dance school together, she may be a scary boss but she's a real nerd outside of the workplace."
"oh? i didn't know boss myoi could dance!"
momo happily opens her sandwich, taking a bite and speaking with her mouth full, "you can actually find her on youtube. she was a pretty famous ballerina back in the day. woulda made it big if her parents didn't drag her back to run this company."
"and you?"
"what about me?"
"you dance?"
momo laughs, "yeah. i spend most of my spare time in the studio. unfortunately it doesn't really pay well. i was going to be evicted until mina was sweet enough to offer me a job here so i can afford my rent and continue doing what i love so i owe her a lot. oh speaking of- you weren't able to get any food! here-" she slides over her salad and soup.
"oh no no it's okay-"
"please just take it. it's not much anyway, i'll still have to come up with something to pay you back."
"you know what? those baskin & robbins vouchers. do you have anyone to go with?"
momo looks up at you from her sandwich in surprise, "no i don't."
"you free after work today?"
"i was just going to head into the studio but i could free that up."
"great. i'll see you in the lobby at 5 then. we can head to that store in gangnam, the one where you can taste test like all the flavours."
"really?!" momo's eyes brigten, "i've always wanted to do that but no-one's ever wanted to go with me."
"well perfect! sounds like a plan then!"
you grin at her excitement. you were always a little more than awkward, sana was the one who found it easy to go up to anyone on the street and befriend them. it was a little harder for you to make friends, you were lucky when sana found you interesting enough in your first year of college to strike up a conversation, and then find you interesting enough to keep coming back until you were inseparable and moved in together to save money on rent. you haven't really needed anyone else aside from sana since then, but momo was different, you felt an instant connection with her that you haven't felt since sana. she intrigued you, and you wanted to get to know her better.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
you're laughing at momo's face when she cringes in disgust.
"eugh what is that? that was disgusting!"
"i think it was like pikachu something something." you manage out between laughs.
"eugh pikachu guts and blood for sure. i never thought pikachu would taste like banana and vomit."
"i can't believe you just ate pikachu! he's such a little cutie surely he can't taste bad!"
"oh yeah? you try it-" she's spooning a bit of the vile yellow coloured ice cream and shoving it into your mouth while you're still vulnerable from laughing.
the first hit of banana on your tastebuds has you coughing immediately. and now it's momo's turn to laugh at you, it's a bright, almost wheeze-like sound, you think it's cute.
"okay yeah- we need to ban the killing of pikachu- this shit should not be served-"
"i'm glad you're on the save pikachu agenda as well then. but there's no way we are finishing that one."
"we don't have to. these were technically free anyway because of your amazing bingo skills after all."
she giggles, "okay but i'm still going to see if we can get replacement flavours. i wanted to try that gone with the wind flavour as well anyway."
you wish her luck as she slides out of the booth, bringing your tray of tester ice-creams with her towards the counter and waving down an employee.
you turn on your phone, scrolling to your messages to find sana's sent you a few unread texts.
bestest friend in the world🐿️💜: u coming home tn?
bestest friend in the world🐿️💜: don't ignore me y/nnnnn
bestest friend in the world🐿️💜: am i eating dinner on my own? 😞
bestest friend in the world🐿️💜: u better be safe idiot if ur not home by 10 i'm calling the police and filing a missing persons report
you laugh a little at her messages.
y/n: don't call the police! i'm fine! i'm just out with that coworker i told u about a few days ago. the one who saved my ass w my boss. i'll be home afterwards don't wait up!
momo's coming back before you can see sana's reply. you slide your phone back into your pocket, grinning at her, "what abomination have you brought back for us to try this time?"
momo places the new tray down, "i kinda forgot most of the names but at least the colour palette this time looks a little more edible."
"really? this neon green looks edible to you?"
"hey! a lotta green flavoured foods are edible! most vegetables, apples, green tea, mint... besides there's no way anything here will be worse than pikachu guts and blood."
you scrunch your nose a little when she slides in next to you, "i wouldn't want to try a vegetable flavoured ice cream anyway."
"you're just a hater." she's grinning when she spoons out a bright pink ice cream and pops it in her mouth.
you scoff, "am not!"
"suuuuuure. i actually know this place that does this incredible carrot ice cream. you can prove you're not a hater if you come and try it with me next week. there's a new branch opening on friday."
"alright. it's so on."
you spend the rest of the night laughing and poking fun at each other. you got along really well with momo, it felt so easy to connect with her. your levels of awkwardness rubbed off on each other perfectly. you enjoyed hanging out with her, and you're glad work seemed a lot less lonelier now.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
it ends up being really late by the time you get home. momo and you had decided to go for a round of karaoke after ice-cream and the mix of soju and trying to scream to reach the high note in twice's i can't stop me meant you had lost track of time. it was okay though because it was the weekend tomorrow so neither of you had work.
you slip off your shoes in the dark, careful not to make too much sound that could wake sana.
you're tiptoeing into the living room when the lamp light suddenly turns on, and sana's sitting on the couch with her arms crossed.
"you're alive."
you giggle a little at sana looking alike to an evil villain waiting for you to come home. she was much too happy-go-lucky to pull it off.
"what's funny?"
"noooothing."
she frowns, "are you drunk?"
"maaaayyybee."
sana stands up, walking past you and into the kitchen, you follow her like a lost puppy.
"drink this." she pushes a glass of water into your hand, watching you expectantly until you get the message and bring the cup to your lips.
"all of it."
you groan, gulping down the water, and cringing at the fullness you feel in your stomach from all the liquids sloshing around.
sana sighs, rubbing her forehead. "i was worried when you didn't return my texts y'know."
you frown now, realising sana was actually a little annoyed. "i'm sorry. i should've texted you i'd be home late."
she softens, always so forgiving, "it's okay. did you have fun?"
you grin dumbly, nodding, "momo's soooo funny."
"momo?"
"the coworker i was telling you about! she tried to-" you hiccup, "she tried to pay in the cafeteria today with baskin & robbin vouchers and held up pretty much the entire building. i paid instead and we went out and used the vouchers after work, theeeeeen we did karaoke!" you giggle, remembering the day you've had.
"oh..." she's frowning and you can't understand why so you poke her forehead, trying to undo the frown on her face.
"why are you sad?"
"i'm not."
"you're something."
sana rolls her eyes, grabbing your hands to stop playing with her face and leading you towards the bathroom. you're easily distracted, humming a silly tune that's come to mind while she sits you down on the toilet and starts wiping your makeup for the day off. it's a little more complicated when she tries to take your contacts out because you can't stop giggling and blinking but she manages in the end, making you rinse some mouthwash instead of brushing your teeth because she could tell you were falling into the sleepy stage of being drunk.
she's pulling you up and leading you towards your shared bedroom now, putting you to bed and then sliding in next to you, reaching to cover the blanket over the both of you.
you yawn, turning to face her and knock your foreheads together gently, but when you feel the wrinkles still there you open your eyes. "why are you still frowning?"
you can feel her immediately try and relax, "'m not."
"you were."
"ugh just go to sleep y/n. it's late and i'm tired." she's turning around and shuffling away from you which is weird because she was always the one who cuddled and latched onto you before bed.
you miss her warmth immediately, inching towards her and draping an arm over her midriff, entangling your legs and pushing your nose into her hair. "'m sorry."
she sighs against you, grabbing your hands and playing around with your fingers. "it's okay. just don't forget about me yeah?"
"how could i forget about you?"
"goodnight y/n."
you want to ask her more, but you can feel your eyes growing heavier, letting them drift shut, dreaming of ice-cream and cuddles.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
it became a regular thing.
momo and you would hang out after work every friday, she was quickly becoming one of your closest friends.
one night, when you're spread out on a picnic blanket on a hill a little bit away from the city, counting the stars, she asks you, "are you seeing anyone y/n?"
you look at her surprised, "no. why?"
"why aren't you seeing anyone? surely it's not because no one's asked you out before. you're gorgeous and fun to be around. is it because no one's been good enough?"
you blush a little at the compliments, turning to lay back down and stare at the sky, "i think i just haven't been ready for a long time."
"ready?"
"for a relationship. i told you about my best friend sana right?"
momo hums, coming up on her elbow to peer down at you while you try and make out the various constellations in the night.
"once i found her, it kinda felt like everything was okay, like i never really needed anything more. i know a lot of people centre their lives around romantic love and finding their soulmate and whatever, but i've never been like that. with sana, everything was enough. i felt like if i wished for anything more it might disrupt that."
"is sana seeing anyone?"
you chuckle a little, thinking to sana's past romantic escapades, "she's tried but nothing's really worked out. i think we feel the same in that way. that as long as we have each other we don't really need anyone else."
there's a contemplative silence for a bit while momo studies your face. you let her, comfortable enough with her that it doesn't feel awkward even when it is silent. you connect the stars in your head, smiling when you realise you've made out the capricornus constellation.
"what about me?"
the words are spoken softly into the night, you almost don't catch it, but fate would have it blown softly your way, tickling your ears with the question. "what do you mean?"
"you say you and sana don't need anyone else. how do you feel about me?"
you sit up a little then, leaning back on your elbows as you avert your gaze from the arrowhead-like collection of stars to eyes that shine just as bright. "you're different. you're the first person to come into my life since sana that i've felt... like we were meant to meet y'know? all that soulmate stuff and whatever may be cringey but it's nice to believe in. sometimes i think there are just people that i'm meant to meet, and people that i'm not. and fate brought me you."
momo's leaning forward, her eyes drifting down to your lips, her next few words come out in a whisper, "so if i did this..." her eyes flicker back up to yours, letting you pull away if you wanted to, but you find yourself fixed on her lips as well. so when she closes the distance between the two of you, pressing her lips against yours, just barely there, you sigh into her. the smallest brush of your lips together has you feeling light-headed and hazy, she breaks away from you all too quickly, eyes filled with wonder. you can see the reflection of the night sky in her eyes.
you smile softly at her, lips still tingly from the brief kiss.
"if i did that... would that feel like i've disturbed the equilibrium you've found with sana?"
you shake your head gently, "no. it feels just right actually."
when you lean in again, it does feel just right, like the stars have aligned for this one moment. like everything that's happened to you in life has lead you to this.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
someone else didn't feel that way.
she's sitting on the couch, up late again. it was becoming more and more often that she would find herself waiting up for y/n to come home.
she hears the telltale sign of the door unlocking and you stumbling in blindly, trying to adjust to the darkness of your apartment and slipping your shoes off to place carefully on the shoe rack next to sana's.
you're kind of expecting sana to be standing there waiting for you when you come back.
"hey sana. i'm home."
"late."
"yeah i was out with-"
"momo."
"yeah..." you rub your neck shyly, heading towards the kitchen to get a glass of water. she follows you wordlessly.
"is something going on between you and momo y/n?"
you raise an eyebrow, swallowing the water in your mouth before answering, "would it be a problem if there was?"
sana frowns, "no but... i just thought you'd tell me is all."
"i do tell you everything sana. every time i come home late i tell you what we've done. it feels like you don't really want to hear it most of the time though."
she pouts, "i do! i do want to know what's going on. i'm sorry i just... i told you i just don't want you to forget about me."
"and i won't sana. i could never forget you, i don't know why you worry about that." you step up to her, cupping a cheek and tilting it up so she's looking at you.
her eyes are slightly shiny and you suddenly feel terrible for making her wait up for you all these nights, "i just- ever since you started hanging out with her, i feel like you've had less time to spend with me. and i know! i knew eventually you'd find someone to spend the rest of your life with i just- i just didn't know it'd be like this and i wasn't prepared and i don't want to lose you yet-"
"woah! woah woah woah slow down! sweetie what? how long- how come you've never told me this before? i've always felt that- and i told momo this- but i've always felt that i never needed anyone else but you! i always thought that we were the ones that were going to spend the rest of our lives together, you're the only one i want to spend the rest of my life with. you'll never lose me sana i promise and momo- look just because i don't need anyone else in my life aside from you, doesn't mean it's that terrible if there is someone else that makes me happy right?"
"but- don't i make you happy?"
"oh baby you do, you do, you make me so happy." you brush a thumb across her cheek, "look how about i set up a meeting for you and momo to meet. it's about time anyway and i really think you'd get along really well if you got to know her."
she sniffles a little, thinking it over, before finally nodding albeit with slightl hesitance.
you grin, pulling her into a hug and she laughs against you, "you better be paying though."
you laugh as well, overjoyed your best friend was going to meet your... anyway, it didn't matter. sana was just happy to hold you and be close to you, letting her anxieties around you fade into the back of her mind.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
"i'm so sorry momo she promised she'd be here." you sigh in frustration, picking up your phone again to check if sana's replied to any of your messages or calls.
momo smiles kindly, "it's okay. she's probably just caught up in something. don't worry about it!"
"eugh yeah it's just really annoying because we already rescheduled this twice and now she's just not even showing up. wait... do you think something's happened to her? she's not normally bad with replies- oh god what if something's happened-"
"y/n! it's okay! she's probably just somewhere with bad reception right now. i'm sure she'll get back to you soon. should we order first? get your mind off things?"
you sigh, flipping your phone over, not wanting it to distract from the date you were now on with momo. she smiles gently, taking your hand and squeezing.
"yeah that sounds good. have you had a look at the menu yet?" you glance over at the waiter who had seated you, whispering to his coworkers with a sour look on his face, probably from the fact that the two of you have been sat here for almost 40 minutes and only picked at the starter breads and water.
the rest of dinner goes by smoothly. momo is able to distract you from your thoughts about sana and you're thankful for that. being with her was easy, fun. you don't think any of your previous relationships held a candle to momo, and you've only known each other for maybe a month or so.
dessert comes and she's telling you a funny story about how her dog boo had pooped on a guest dancer at her studio and he had to clean it up, only finding out afterwards that his name was also boo. she had apologised profusely and was very embarassed but he was nice about it and had jokingly offered to babysit her dogs anytime.
"speaking of my dogs, i was thinking... do you maybe want to... come over after dinner and meet them?" she's blushing, twirling her fork around and stabbing small pieces of the cheesecake in front of her, eyes avoiding yours.
you beam, "of course! i'd love to!"
"really?" she looks up at you in surprise.
"yeah! i gotta put a face to these little demon dogs you're always talking about."
she whines, "they're not that bad i swear!"
"you know i heard that pets actually take on characteristics of their owners..."
"... what's that supposed to mean?"
"nothing." you tease, pretending to go back to your food.
she kicks you under the table playfully, pouting. you laugh at her, finding her adorable, spooning some of your gelato up and offering it to her. her expression changes immediately when she opens her mouth, accepting the bite with a hum of satisfaction and a grin in thanks.
after dinner, you decide to walk back to momo's since she didn't live too far from the restaurant you had eaten at.
the night air is cool and refreshing, and you don't hesitate to slip your hand into momo's as you stroll along the streets. it's not too busy in this area so you can enjoy the little sounds of the creatures of the night scuttling around in the trees and on the ground. you glance over at momo who has a soft smile on her face, swinging your hands gently with each step, her face adorn with the subtle glimmer of the moon.
she catches you staring, and turns to you with a grin, "something on my face?"
you smile in return, "maaaybe something just-" you step forward, leaning in and hear her breath hitch just slightly when your eyes drop to her lips, you kiss her sweetly, 2 seconds maybe, and then you're breaking away, "there."
she's blushing, and you have a stupid grin on your face like the lovesick fool you are.
"romantic." she rolls her eyes at you, continuing your walk.
"i'll get you flowers next time."
"i'm allergic."
"chocolate then."
"i was joking i'm not allergic but now that you offered, i'll be expecting both."
"what?!"
she laughs, cackles really, her nose scrunches in the most adorable way, hand tightening around yours.
by the time you walk through the door of her apartment, you're a little tired but in the best way possible. the kind of tired where you know you're tired because you've just had the most fantastic day.
the dogs greet you at the door with excitement, panting, tongues out, jumping at momo's legs as soon as she enters. she laughs and bends down, petting them and cooing.
"so this one is dobby, he's a little shyer but he's a sweetheart once he warms up to you. and this little rascal is boo." she points out the two dogs and you bend down, reaching out a hand and letting them sniff you while momo stands up and takes off her jacket, placing it on the coat hanger.
"hiiii nice to meet you boys, i'm y/n, momo's..." you look up at momo, a little hesitant.
she raises an eyebrow at you, crouching down so she's eye level with you again, the dogs between the two of you, thrilled at the attention they're receiving. "girlfriend?"
you beam, giggling and leaning in to kiss her, "girlfriend."
she grins as well, standing up again and heading towards her kitchen, dobby follows her but boo continues to lick at your hand.
"want anything to drink girlfriend?" you can hear her teasing lilt from where you are.
"i'll have whatever you're having girlfriend."
“soy sauce okay then babe?”
your heart stutters at the term of endearment, completely disregarding her drink of choice. “i-i u-um y-yeah!”
you stand up and follow the sound of her laughter into the kitchen, boo pattering along behind you.
"i'm not sure if i want to kiss you if you're the type of person who drinks soy sauce y/n."
"what?! i don't do that!"
"not what i just heard."
you gape at her, but she giggles, coming up to you and planting a kiss on your lips. you can vaguely feel the wag of the dogs' tails at your feet, wondering what exactly their mom's doing letting someone else lick into her mouth.
she breaks away with a sly smirk, "still kissed you."
"uh huh-" you quickly reattach your lips, addicted to the taste of her, the way her lips move against yours, how she smells so close to you, the way her hands grip your shirt tightly, pulling you into her when you push her against the kitchen counter, trapping her against it.
it suddenly gets a lot more serious when she nips your bottom lip softly, and you let out an uncontrollable, but very real moan, and you have to break away painfully.
"my room?" momo breathes against you, your foreheads placed against each other's, sharing the same airspace.
you bite your lip, exactly where she had sunk her teeth into only seconds prior, watching the way she stalks your action like a hawk, "mhm."
and she surprises you when she picks you up easily by the thighs, and you yelp, wrapping your legs around hers and feeling her grin into the next kiss she lands on your lips, navigating her living room and into the bedroom, closing the door behind the both of you so her dogs wouldn't be privy to the sights of you coming apart under your new girlfriend's tongue.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
the next morning, momo kisses you awake with the smell of breakfast wafting into the bedroom. you blush at the sight of her only in an oversized tee, the marks on her thighs reminiscent of your activities the night prior. she doesn't fail to tease you at the red pigment blossoming on your cheeks, pointing out your own marks on your neck and chest.
you spend the morning cuddling on the couch, watching reruns of glee and feeding each other the waffles momo's made for breakfast, stealing kisses in between each bite, the dogs playing around on their own, sometimes hopping into your lap to nose at you or momo, asking for pets and pats.
you smile dreamily as you unlock your door, remembering your time with her, how she promised she'd buy a new toothbrush for you if you promised to come over again, which you did of course, that was obviously a given but you adored her asking.
you step inside finding it quiet. when you place your shoes next to sana's spot on the shoe rack, you realise she's still home when you thought she was meant to be working.
"sana?"
there's no response, so you drop off your things, entering your living room and finding she's nowhere to be found. you frown, heading towards the kitchen, then the bathroom, and finally your room with the door ajar. you peek inside and find a lump under the sheets, her blackout curtains still tightly shut.
you tiptoe inside, hovering over the bed and peeling back the duvet a little to see if she's still asleep.
you don't expect her to yelp, pulling the duvet back and burrowing deeper into the little nest she's made. you hear the telltale signs of her scrambling to cover up the fact that she was crying.
"w-what are you doing here?" her voice is croaky, shaky, you sit tenderly on the side of the bed.
"this is my home."
there's a sniffle, and then "people come home and sleep in their own beds. you didn't."
you sigh, trying not to get frustrated, "sana... you didn't turn up yesterday. and you never called me back or returned any of my texts."
"my grandma was sick."
"is she okay now?"
"y-yeah."
"was she really sick?"
"...no."
you hum, placing a hand gingerly on what you deduct to be her arm.
"i'm not mad."
"you shouldn't be."
you raise an eyebrow, "you stood us up."
"i had my reasons."
"and what were they?"
she sighs under the covers, then suddenly she's whipping them down and leaning into your space, planting her lips on yours.
you're stunned for a second, 2 seconds, and then she's pulling away, and burrowing back under the covers. you barely caught a glimpse of red cheeks and red eyes, your lips tingling from the press of her lips.
it's too late to pull her back out when you come to your senses, touching your fingers to your lips still in mild shock.
"i-i- s-sana i-"
she sighs exasperatedly, "is that reason enough?"
"w-why didn't you tell me?"
"because you were all over this new girl! you barely had time for me anymore!"
"what- that's not- how long have you felt this way sana?"
she groans, shuffling a little, "i don't know. i just know i didn't like it when you started seeing momo."
"so all that about not forgetting you..."
"well yeah... i think i've always liked you. i was just never threatened by someone else taking you away, even with all your past partners you've never- you've always come back to me."
you sigh frustratedly, running a hand through your hair trying to think what exactly this meant for you. "i'm with momo."
she scoffs, "i know."
"we slept together last night."
"... like in the same bed? yeah we sleep together too."
"no like- like slept together slept together."
there's silence for a bit, you can hear the breaths of the both of you, the wheels in her head turning.
"... you've slept with other people before right? what difference does this make?"
"i think i really like her sana."
she sits up then, hair a mess, skin blotchy, eye bags present, but her eyes are fierce. you're hit with a sudden wave of nostalgia. you really hadn't seen sana in so long. seen her smile, heard her laugh, ever since you started going out with momo she started acting weird and you knew why now, but she was right when she said you had pushed her away because of it, preferring to bask in the new romance momo offered you, avoiding dealing with the complicated feelings that arose when you thought about sana. you missed her.
"if this is you rejecting me just come out with it. stop beating around the bush and say it. say you don't love me like i love you."
"... you... you love me?"
she rolls her eyes impatiently, a crease forming between her eyebrows that you want to reach out and smooth out of habit, "yes."
"i-" you can feel tears welling up, you don't want to choose between your best friend and your new lover. you don't want to lose sana because of this.
sana notices because she notices everything about you, and her eyes soften, wanting to touch and comfort but resigning to fiddling with her fingers instead.
"just go." she says softly after you're unable to form words for the next minute.
"no but i-"
"i'm tired y/n. just go." she's turning around onto her side, preparing to lie down and curl up again, but in the spur of the moment, you grab her wrist, pulling her into you and kissing her again.
she lets out a sound of surprise, eyes widening, but lets you kiss her.
you're not even sure what you're doing, all you can think is you can't lose sana. not like this. not when the entire future you've planned out in your head includes her. not when she tastes like the saline of the tears streaming out of both of your eyes, that and a hint of something that was uniquely sana. not when you both still had so much life left to live together.
all of this remains in your mind when you follow her tear tracks, kissing her neck, her shoulders, down her chest. you can feel her still crying even when she sucks new marks into your skin, right next to the ones momo's left on you last night. the both of you don't know what this means, just that it's the end of something, and you were both going to make the most of it.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
"so how's sana been?"
"huh?"
"your best friend y/n. was everything okay after she wasn't able to make dinner last week? you haven't talked about her much since then."
"oh. yeah she's alright." you're not really sure if she was alright actually. you haven't seen her since the two of you slept together. you woke up to an empty bed, no note, but all of her things were still around so you know she hasn't run off to another country or anything.
"that's good. is there anything you wanna talk about?"
"what do you mean?"
"you've just been a little distant since last week. is it- do you regret- do you still want to be together?"
you look up from pushing your food around your plate, surprised at the vulnerability in momo's voice.
"no- i mean yes of course i still want to be together! i'm sorry i've been off i just-" you sigh dejectedly, "there's something i need to show you after work today."
"oh?"
"yeah... it's not... it's not anything you have to worry about, and i think it'll explain a lot, but it's also pretty heavy so i understand if you don't want to-"
you're cut off when she grabs your hand, squeezing it gently and smiling, "i'd love for you to show me. i'm just glad you're not breaking up with me one week into the relationship." she jokes a little, trying to lighten the mood, and you smile, grateful for her, but feeling your anxieties pile up knowing that you were about to reveal something to momo that no one else except sana knew. if you wanted this relationship to work though, you needed to do this. you couldn't start this relationship off on the wrong foot, you wanted to do this right.
♰˚☽˚。⋆
your grip on momo's hand is tight, but she doesn't complain, squeezing back every few minutes to remind you that you weren't alone.
after work, you had driven both you and momo to your destination, a park a little out of the ways. the drive was quiet, momo didn't mind though, humming softly to the music on the radio and staring out the window, glancing back at you every so often. you parked, stepping out of the car, already doubting the decision of coming here.
there are a few other people in the park milling about. momo smiles politely at an old couple who break away from a hug to nod greetings at you. you barely notice them though, your tunnel vision and your thoughts becoming louder as you get closer.
you pull along momo who's holding a large bunch of flowers that you had stopped by at the florist on your drive to pick up.
you spot her then. avoiding eye contact as you get closer to her.
then you're standing in front of her.
"y/n."
momo lets out a little muted gasp behind you, but you squeeze her hand, focusing forward.
"sana."
"i see you've decided to forcefully make momo and i meet like this."
"i didn't have any other option."
"there's always another option y/n."
"not when it comes to you sana."
she tilts her head, "what is that supposed to mean?"
you shuffle your feet a little, "you know what it means."
she sighs, stepping closer and cupping your cheek. "why are you crying?"
you're surprised at her statement, the hand that's not holding momo's coming up to wipe hastily at your eyes.
sana's hand drops along with her face. "i thought you said you'd never forget me."
"and i never will sana."
"what's this then? it feels an awful lot like goodbye."
you can't contain the tears streaming down your cheeks, "i could never say goodbye to you sana."
sana's crying now too when she looks up, "don't then. don't say goodbye. say you'll pick me. say we'll stay together for the rest of our lives, like we promised when we were kids. say you love me y/n."
"i-i- i can't sana! i can't do that!"
"why not?"
"because- because i still have the rest of my life sana."
she sniffles, wiping at her eyes. how you wished you could see her smile just once more.
"i guess this is it then."
"no. no this isn't- i told you sana i'll never forget you. you'll always be with me. everything i do i'll always think about you, every new person i meet, every new life stage i enter, i'll think about you. i- i- i loved you sana."
then sana's in your arms, crying into your neck while you hold her, sobbing nearly hysterically, clutching onto everything, a film roll of memories playing behind your eyelids, of the first time you met, the first kiss you shared drunk at a college party, the times you'd piggy back sana from the library to your shared apartment after attempting to pull an all-nighter, the time you first signed your lease together, the time she squealed and brought you into a hug after you got your first job, insisting on a celebration, every single birthday, graduation, milestone, every single moment you've shared with her crosses your mind.
"i have to let you go now." you croak into her ear, voice still shaky and laden with emotion.
she's quiet for a bit, then she pulls back, eyes wet but smiling. she's smiling. oh god you've missed it. "i understand." she says against your lips, foreheads knocked against one another's. you close your eyes, committing to memory her smile, each line, each crease, you were never going to forget her.
when you blink your eyes open again, she's gone, the only evidence of her existence, the headstone reading:
in loving memory of
minatozaki sana
1996 - 2019
you don't even realise you're crouching in front of the headstone now, having let go of momo's hand long ago, until you hear a small rustle behind you and you look up to see momo offering the flower bouqet to you and crouhing down. you smile in gratitude, taking it from her and placing it under the letters of the headstone gently, rearranging to make sure it fit perfectly.
you speak up after a while, having left momo in the dark for long enough now. "it was a freak accident. she was coming home late after work because there was this kid in her class who's parents didn't come pick them up until way after school ended. she was in a rush because it was movie night. no matter how busy our lives got, we always had movie night, something that was stable when everything else in life wasn't i guess. didn't see the car coming. she died on the way to the hospital."
momo's quiet, placing a hand gently on your shoulder.
"i'm sorry i lied to you. i haven't- it's been five years since it happened, but i haven't fully moved on i guess. not until now. you know this is the first time i've visited her grave since the funeral?" you chuckle brokenly, feeling the tears well up again.
"and there's not even anything under here. she was cremated and her parents took her back to japan."
"that doesn't mean you can't still grieve here."
you sigh, "i know. and it's silly y'know? to think i'm still grieiving after 5 years. everyone else has moved on except me. i still- i still saw her everyday- in that way i wasn't lying to you. i just- after the accident and then the rush of the funeral, it all didn't feel real. i still felt like i was going home to sana, and to laughs and smiles and movie nights and cuddles. it didn't make sense y'know? i know death is natural and whatever but it doesn't make sense to me, how someone is here one second and then gone the next. i couldn't make sense of it. so i didn't. she was still alive to me. i still saw her everyday, still packed both our lunches, sent her off to work, took care of her when she was sick, i never got rid of any of her things because in my head she was still using them. she still has her place on the shoe rack at home, her clothes are still mixed in with mine, her expired skin products are still on the bathroom counter. i never- she's always been with me momo i-"
you start blubbering, words no longer making sense and you feel momo shuffling closer to you, wrapping her arm around you tentatively, and you turn and bury yourself into her, crying into the arms of someone physical. someone who was real, who was here in the present with you.
momo doesn't say anything, letting you cry, running her hand through your hair soothingly, letting you take as much time as you needed.
when your sobs subside the sun's setting. you sniffle into her, breathing in her scent, a new comfort to you.
"grief is a monster. not everyone gets out alive, and those that do might only survive in pieces. but it's a monster that can be conquered with time."
you chuckle a little into her. "where'd you get that from?"
"a book i read. summer bird blue. i can lend it to you if you want."
you hum, pulling away from her and wiping at your eyes, smiling softly, "i'd like that."
she smiles as well. "do you think she would’ve liked me?"
you turn back to the gravestone, the cold words etched in marble. "yeah. i think she would’ve loved you. i kept on telling her that y'know? in my head. you two would’ve gotten along famously."
"i'm glad." momo turns to the gravestone as well, "it's nice to finally meet you sana. i promise i'll take care of y/n. you don't have to give me the whole best friend speech about how you'll curse me for the rest of my life or anything. she's special, and i'm grateful you were such a good friend to her. she loved you a lot."
you sniffle, listening to momo talk to sana. when she's done, she looks back at you with a smile, her face illuminated with the golden-orange hues of the sunset.
"thank you momo."
"hmm?"
"remember how i was talking about soulmates? how i think there's people i was meant to meet and people i'm not? thank you. i think sana brought you into my life to help me get over this. i haven't- the last five years has just been me in my head, i've been on autopilot. you were the first person to change that. to make me feel like- like there was a little more brightness to life again."
momo's tearing up now as well, you'll learn that it's not very common that she cries. "i'm glad fate has led me to you then. and i hope you know this doesn't mean sana's gone. she'll always stay with you."
you look back to the tombstone longingly, "i know. i promised i'd never forget her. she will always stay with me."
momo leans into you again, and you rest your head on her shoulder, the cool breeze blowing against you softly, the sun setting behind you.
maybe momo was right. it took you five years, and it'll probably take you a lot longer, but you were going to get over this monster, and you were going to live out the rest of your life, like sana always wanted for you, not in-your-head-sana, the real sana that you're not afraid to admit is gone now, but will always stay in your mind, your heart, with your soul.
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camryn-haitani · 8 months ago
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omgg heyy so i binge read all of your writings and like im speechless.. like holy crap. but like youre legt so talented, so i was thinking if you could maybe like write about sam golbach hearing colby and I from the other room doing some nasty.. and like he cant help and after we finish he wants to recreate it?? i hope u unferstand what im yapping abt here.. anyways once i LOVE you work !! <3
YES OFC
it's like you're in my mind
I hope you like this <3
you sound heavenly, doll
Sam and Colby x FemReader
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you and Colby start to get nasty in y'all's shared room. Sam decides to surprise Colby by coming by y'all's house all while he hears y'all and he can't help but make you sound like that too.
TW: SMUT, cursing, masturbating (Sam), p in v sex, name calling (darling, love, sugar, baby, princess, slut), smelling (colbys smells you a few times), fingering (fem receiving), unprotected sex, pussy eating, slapping (thighs, pussy, face), squirting, crying, hair pulling
I'm sorry if this is a lil short
"fuck, colby!" his cock is hitting your sweet spot over and over. he can't help it, you feel so good wrapped around him.
"I know, darling. just a lil more, I promise." colbys head in your neck, breathing in your scent. he can't get enough. whatever perfume, deodorant, body wash you use, keep using it because he loves it.
"c-cumm-ing" you manage to let out in breaths. all while Colby keeps hitting your spot over and over and over. he knows exactly where it is, he just loves to tease you, acting like he doesn't.
"cum with me, darling. take all of it, take all of me." the words flow right out as your walls flutter around him.
you both calm down from your high as Colby goes to get a washcloth to clean you both.
"imma go get some dinner for tonight, I'll be back soon, love." he kisses your temple and leaves.
you roll over and scroll through social media until you hear a knock on your door. still being sore from Colby, you wobble your way over to the door to open it.
"oh... hi Sam. what's up?" you ask him.
he brings you in for a hug. you, of course, hug him back. he trails his hands down to the fat of your ass. "you sounded heavenly, darlin'." he says in your neck, tickling your ear.
Earlier
the sound of Sam's fist hitting against his balls match with the pace colbys fucking you at. Sam angles his hand more upward to create the illusion he's actually fucking you.
"fuck y/n.... you feel so good." he throws his head back as he came on his chest and stomach. he had been teasing himself ever since you and Colby started. palming himself through his jeans, only fisting the top of his leaking cock, even going so painfully slow. sam couldn't take it anymore.
Now
you've been standing for a good minute and the more you do, the more your legs get weak. Sam feels your weight shift and he gets an idea.
"jump, doll." he orders. you nod as you jump with your remaining strength. Sam's hands still on your ass as he walks you over to your bed.
"been waiting for this, sugar. bet you taste like it too." he squeezes your thighs then gives them a slap. you pull up your legs to spread them even more.
"god you look divine, baby" he licks a fat stripe up your pussy. your hands immediately find a way into his hair. your thighs subconsciously close but Sam pulls away and gives your cunt a warning slap.
"keep them open darling, I need to taste all of you." Sam dove his tongue back into your wet hole.
the knot in your stomach begins to unfold and he could tell, so he pulls away.
"w-what no no no no, Sam please." you beg.
"I don't think so, princess. want you to cum hard on my cock. can you do that for me , sweet thing?"
you nod but you felt a sharp sting on your cheek. you moan at the contact and sam gripped your chin to make you look at him.
"I want words, slut. now answer me properly." he doesn't let go until you answer him.
"yes! 'm sorry!"
Sam's fingers circle ever so slowly on your clit. he coat his two middle fingers with your slick and his spit and push them past your dripping walls. Sam moved his fingers so fast, you never had time to speak. only little squeaks everytime his fingertips hit that special spot in you. with everytime he pushed them back in, your thighs ripple every time his knuckles hit your skin.
"sa-! 'm gon-! cum!" he didn't react in enough time when he felt warm liquids coat his stomach.
"fuck, doll... do that again for me, ok?" he pulls his fingers out and aligns his cock with your pussy. he pushes past your ring of muscle, Sam restrains himself from pushing all of himself in and fucking you. but he knew you need to adjust to him.
you give the nod of approval to continue, and he did just that. he gets to the base and pulls back out just to push back in.
he can finally start going faster when your little pained whimpers turn into moans.
"fuck, your doing so good for me, aren't you doll?" his head hung in your shoulder.
"yes! doing so good for you." when he out his head down, he reached an angle that he didn't hit before. that knot in your stomach came a little too early than you wanted it to but you didn't mind.
"sa-m cu- cum-ing 'gain" you somehow managed to get out. the same feeling on Sam's stomach appeared again but he didn't stop. you were soo sensitive that tears started to form in the corners of your eyes.
"I know darling, just a little more for me." Sam muffled in your shoulder.
"fuck, pull my hair y/n." and you did just that. you grabbed a handful of his blonde hair and tugged. he let out the most erotic moan you've ever heard.
"shit lemme cum inside you please?" his 'please' came out higher than the rest of his words.
"please! Sam cum in me, please please please!"
he gets himself up and pushed himself a few more times to make sure it's not coming out. he slides his cock out of you and goes to clean y'all up.
you hear the door unlock and bags being set down on the counter. the footsteps come closer to your room. your sprawled out on your bed, tears down your pretty cheeks along with a red spot from Sam, legs twitching, and pussy leaking with Sam's cum. Colby opens the door and basks in your position.
"I see y'all had some fun."
all you do is whine as they both laugh.
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