#just wanna be clear on that i forgot to add that disclaimer to this last reaction post
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ninja-knox-ur-sox-off · 4 months ago
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I don't look for season 5 criticism (cause I get sad when I see it and take it too personal) (that sounds bad, I'm purposely looking at your liveblog knowing it will have criticism, I dont feel bad here cause I'm ready). But of the negativity I've seen, which again I don't look for, no one has ever mentioned sound design as an issue. Sandy sounded like sandy, macaque like macaque. Not saying it's just you, but it is the first time I've seen that criticism
Ayo that's fair! I get what ya sayin o7 ngl I don't really go lookin for critical stuff either, and i do try my best not to focus too much on my own negativity cause i don't like being super negative it is stresssFUL (though there is definitely gonna be salt in my reaction posts sadly cause i'm still processing and mourning the loss of FB :') ) but you definitely end up seeing it around regardless of whether you look for it or not. It does tend help when people preface it with "hey guys i'ma be a little negative here." seeing it out of nowhere can really feel like a slap to the face. (i'm glad my posts are manageable for you) ur doing great dude <3
Honestly I think it might just be a me thing. I was informed the sound mixing studios changed so I'm currently crediting the off-sounds to that. But i spend like a lot of time listening to the sound effects in monkie kid while I make my amvs since i don't just mute the sound. I use the impacts and sound effects as part of the beat of the songs for most of my amvs. I even end up timing the rhythm of the voices to match the music cause I can hear when it clashes or when its off. I've spent hours and hours and hours and hours listening to voice clips and getting familiar with tone and beat and delivery and cadence of the voice actors so when things sound even a little off, I think for me it sounds REALLY off, even if its not noticeable for other people.
leave it to me to end up noticing something literally no one else cares about WHEEZE gotta admit that's comedy right there CACKLES. thanks for the ask dude! i hope you have a good day <3
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babyjakes · 3 years ago
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perfect little things. [blurb.]
〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉
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summary | you’re embarrassed to share with chris that you were planning on (once again) watching through all the harry potter movies. luckily, he’s more than happy to join you, as well as remind you how absolutely adorable your love for the series makes you.
pairing | boyfriend!chris evans x reader
warnings | none :-) much fluff! also i wrote this having never read or seen a single lotr or harry potter book or movie lol-
word count | 625
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requested by @cristinagronk16 | Can you please do a cute one of Chris teasing you about your love for Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings!? Maybe you guys watched them in quarantine and he didn’t know how obsessed you were since the relationship was still new? Thanks!
an | hi, thanks so (so so) much for this first request! tbh i know nothing about lotr and very little about hp but i did my best <3 hope you enjoy, friend!
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“Hey doll, you wanna watch a film tonight?” Chris asks casually as the two of you are clearing your dishes from the dinner table. You look up at him, surprised. Up until this point, you had thought he was going to be spending the night in the office on a zoom call for an interview. Because you would be on your own, you had already made some plans.
“Oh- sure!” you agree quickly, causing him to furrow his brows at your startled response.
“What? We don’t have to if you don’t want to,” he rushes quickly, wrapping an arm around you as you place the last of the dishware on the counter. You lean into his chest, hugging him back and laughing slightly.
“No, no, it’s okay!” you assure him quickly. “I’d love to watch a film! I just- I thought you had the interview tonight, so I had already kinda thought out what I was gonna do,” you admit.
“Right, sorry,” he understands, leaning down and planting a kiss on the top of your head. “The show canceled last minute; I totally forgot to tell you. What were you gonna do by yourself? I’d love to join.”
A faint heat begins to rise through your cheeks as you hide your face away a bit into his shirt. “W-well I, I dunno,” you say meekly, making Chris bend an ear down slightly to catch your words.
“Hmm? What was that, bug?” he murmurs softly, smiling warmly at your shyness. “C’mon, you can tell me. What were your plans, sweetheart?”
A slight pout forms on your face as you tell him lamely, “I was gonna restart the Harry Potter movies.” His smile only widens at your admission, and he reaches a hand up to rest on your hair, ruffling it slightly.
“And what’s wrong with that, hmm? I’d love to start them again,” he coos gently, the accepting tone in his voice causing some of your embarrassment to diminish.
“B-but, we just finished them the other week,” you remind him. The reason you thought Chris’s interview was the perfect opportunity for you to restart the series was because he already sat through the entirety of it with you just a short time ago. After that, he watched all three Lord of the Rings films with you, too. Something you haven’t talked much about with him about is the fact that these series are your absolute favorite, and you’ve been worried he might find it silly how much you like to reread/watch the content. To your surprise, though, his reaction is turning out to be much more understanding than originally anticipated.
“I know, but they’re great movies. And if you wanna watch them again, there’s nothing I’d rather be doing than cuddling up with you and dodge and starting them over.” The sincerity and thoughtfulness of his words melt your heart and you smile up at him, his blue eyes peering kindly into yours. “Besides, the first run-through was great,” he adds playfully. “I don’t know what was better: the actual movies, or just seeing you so absolutely enthralled with something. It was too cute; you made it hard to focus.”
“Chris,” you whine in response, the redness returning to your cheeks now stronger than before. He squeezes his arms around you and chuckles, swaying you slightly back and forth as you stand in his embrace.
“What? You were like a little kid on Christmas morning; it was adorable,” he gushes.
“It’s embarrassing,” you frown, trying to hide away again in his warm chest.
“Aw, y/n. It’s not embarrassing; I love it. It’s so pure, so genuine, I love it. I love you,” he states. “And all the perfect little things that make you who you are.”
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sainz-zayn · 4 years ago
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Constant love (Up to you)
He always asks for your consent and leaves everything up to you.
Warnings: Insecurities, suggestive themes, virginity loss, a little pyhsical violence.
Word count: 3k+
Disclaimer: All characters and event in this story even those based on real people are entirely fictional.
This Story is Inspired by the song: Up to you
By: Prettymuch ft. Nct Dream
But in a little more mature way.
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Jungwoo is your boyfriend for almost three years and you couldn`t ask for more than his love and affection. You`re always happy when you`re with him you love the way his eyes lit up whenever he sees you. 
Your favorite thing to do with him is cuddling or either cooking. Jungwoo loves skinship so much like holding your hands every time or back hugging you. You always love it when he`s clingy but sometimes you feel like you`re being unfair to him because he always asks for your consent when he wants to do something that can make you uncomfortable even though he`s been dating you for years now. 
You feel sad or sometimes guilty when you can`t give him what he needs as a man. Which leaves him sexually frustrated but that doesn`t stop him from loving you dearly. Jungwoo knows that you`re still not ready and he respects that. He`s ready to wait until you`re ready. 
"Y/n, are you okay?" You look at your side to see Joy talking to you. 
"Yeah, why?" You asked her before grabbing a glass full of water. 
"You Kinda look down today, to be honest." Joy looks at you with worried eyes, She looks at what you`re staring and now she knows why. 
You don`t know why but your anxiety is attacking you again. Yes, when it comes to your relationship with Jungwoo you`re always insecure. Your eyes wander to Jungwoo and Seohyun, you wonder if Jungwoo is enjoying his time with her. Your biggest fear is losing him or someday he`ll leave you. 
"You`re fidgeting your fingers again Y/n. There`s no need to be jealous, you know that Jungwoo loves you and only you." Joy said reassuringly.
"We both know how much I don`t like Seohyun right? like she`s always getting on my nerves. Also, don`t forget what she did to us in High School."  Yeah, you and a few of the boys know that Seohyun is a bully back in High school and Jungwoo doesn`t know that. 
"I know, I know now calm down we should leave and go somewhere else before anything happens" You and the other girls leave Taeyong's house before going to the mall. 
You enjoy the time that you have with them. Y`all eat anything that you want to taste and wandering around the mall to buy new clothes and dressing the girls to the point that you didn`t realize what time it is.
-*-
It`s currently 11:00 pm when you open your phone. Because you forgot that you turned it off before leaving Jungwoo at Taeyong`s house. 
"Oh shit!" You whisper to yourself so the other girls won`t worry about you. 
30 missed calls!? 50 unread messages!? from Jungwoo. You`re surely dead when you get home.
"Guys I have to go or else you know what will gonna happen" You just hug them before leaving first. You`re kinda nervous to go home because you`re sure that Jungwoo is waiting for you to come home.
-*-
Jungwoo is so worried that he called you 30 times but still no answer nor text, and what makes him even madder is that you leave without telling him or texting him. That's how he ended up drinking, he doesn`t know why but he just wants to.
"Where have you been!?" You`re startled at your boyfriend's loud voice. 
"I-I just go out with the g-" He cut off your words without letting you explain.
"Without telling me!? Do you know how worried I was!? It`s fucking late at night and there you are enjoying your time with your best friends. Completely forgetting that you have a boyfriend that is waiting for you!"  You just look down because you know that he`s right.
"Baby I`m sorry I forgot to turn on my phone. Trust me I don`t have any intention to purposely ignore your calls and text.”  You plead.
"Even though I`m jealous that your spending more time with Seohyun than me" You whispered the last part so he won't hear it but he did.
"What?" His eyes soften realizing what you feel and why you leave. 
"What`s, what?" You asked him while your eyes are wandering around to avoid his gaze.
"N-nothing" He stuttered and you wonder what`s with the sudden change in his attitude.
"I`m sorry for raising my voice at you" He said. 
"Did you drink?" You asked him softly before putting the bag on the couch.
"Yeah, a little I just need something to accompany me while waiting for you" He said and he peppered you with his kisses starting from your forehead, cheeks, lips, and neck.
Jungwoo doesn`t know what has gotten into him. He let his body talk, he caresses your back softly and the two of you stayed in the same position for at least a minute.
"I`m sorry I don`t know what has gotten into me. I`m sorry if that makes you uncomfortable" He said and clear his throat. You turn around to face him. You`re sad that you can`t give it to him but sooner or later you have to.
"No, don`t worry baby it`s okay." You tell him and you can see the disappointment that he tried to hide but you can see it in his eyes. 
" I`ll leave it up to you if you wanna spend the night when the time is right." You`re happy that he`s trying to comfort you even though he didn`t get what he wants from you. That is why you`re insecure about yourself, what if he`s not happy anymore because he`s always waiting for you. You hate that you still take your time even though you`re ready.
"Just remember that whenever you`re comfortable we can make that move" Jungwoo sigh before giving you a peck on the lips. 
"Let`s go to sleep now baby, you must be tired." 
The two of you enter your share bedroom and after a minute of laying on the bed Jungwoo falls into a deep sleep.
-*-
You wakeup without Jungwoo on your side and you feel sadder at what happened last night. He leaves early today I thought he said, he doesn`t have any schedule for the whole week but why is he gone?
Does he already eat breakfast or he leaves without eating breakfast? Jungwoo knows that you hate it when he`s not eating breakfast you'll always say.
"It`s okay to skip lunch or dinner, breakfast is the most important but it doesn't mean that you should skip dinner and lunch just because I say it`s okay to skip it." and he will just stay quiet because he loves it when you`re showing your motherly side.
You`re cellphone vibrates and you saw a Dm notification from an unknown person. You quickly check it and you're surprised at what you saw. You don`t know if you should cry or you should be mad, you should be... You don`t know anymore.
You look at the picture again to make sure you didn`t saw the wrong person but it`s real, it`s Jungwoo with Seohyun they look happy together.
"Nothing is going on, right? hanging out with a girl is normal. Calm down Y/n, you know is Jungwoo is not capable of what you`re thinking." You said to yourself to make you calm down.
"Here we go again! Y/n stop being insecure about yourself" You whisper at yourself and after long thinking, you just let them maybe Jungwoo have something important to do with her and that`s not bad.
-*-
"Hey, I know right he`s super handsome and I`ve been watching his dramas and movies. Don`t tell this to win-win but they have similarities" Joy is fangirling through the phone and saying how much he loves this one actor name Im Siwan.  
"I know right plus he`s attractive no doubt he`s your type" You stifled your laugh because you`re teasing her about her liking him.
"Yeah, yeah whatever" Joy said.
"I know that you`re rolling your eyes at me now even though I can`t see you Joy" You replied.
"Oh my god, how did you know? are you a psychic now Y/n, or are you stalking me? cause the last time I remember you`re a surgeon" She said changing her tone into a playful one.
"Oh, c`mon shut up!" The two of you laugh in unison when the door suddenly burst open.
"Joy I gotta go, bye love you." you end the call without letting joy bid her goodbye.
"I`m home" Jungwoo walks to the sofa to kiss you but you turn your head to the side making his soft lips land on your cheek.
"Hey, you okay?" He asked with disappointment in his eyes.
"Yes, I`m fine" You replied dryly.
"Uhm... Whom are you with earlier?" You asked with hesitation in your voice.
"I`m with the boys" He said while rubbing his temples softly.
So you`re lying now? How could you?
"Yeah right with the boys" and you smiled at him and he can see that something is off with you today.
"Can`t you just tell me what is wrong? I`m really tired right now I don`t want any problem to add up." He said making you offended.
"Okay, then I`m sorry if I`m causing you a problem just by asking you a simple question that you didn`t answer honestly. Now, Kim Jungwoo I`ll ask you the same question again I swear if you still answer the same thing I`ll leave!" He`s taken aback at your sudden outburst making him gulp. Yes, he lied it`s because he thinks that it will be better if you won`t know anything that happened earlier.
"Okay, I swear I`m with the boys but if you`re talking about this morning. I`m with Seohyun" You're trying so hard to control your jealousy right now because you want an explanation from him.
"W-why?" you stuttered.
"It`s because, because..." Jungwoo doesn`t know how to explain it but you need to know.
"It`s because of what Kim Jungwoo? are you fucking cheating on me!?" Your patience can`t wait anymore but you didn`t mean what you have just said to him.
"W-what!? of course not. Why would I do that when I`m completely contented just by having you." He exclaimed.
"Now let me explain and hear me out."  He explained everything that happened this morning and you feel guilty for thinking that he`s cheating on you.  
He said that he meets Seohyun this morning because he wants to personally talk to her. To make her stay away from him because Seohyun is hitting on him despite knowing that he has a girlfriend.
-*-
"I`m sorry" You whispered while caressing Jungwoo`s hand. You gave him a short kiss on his forehead before standing up.
"You don`t need to be sorry, baby." You`re startled at his voice. Oh, you know how much you like hearing Jungwoo`s morning voice.
"You know that I can wait until you are ready right? because that is not the reason why we are in this relationship." Jungwoo taps the other side of the bed signaling you to lay on it again.
"I know baby but I can`t let you be like this you always leave everything up to me even though we`re dating for years now." You scoot closer to his embrace.
"You don`t need to rush yourself we can do it albeit slowly" Jungwoo said making you more comfortable in his embrace.
"I love you, Jungwoo" You said.
"I love you too. By the way, get ready I`ll be picking you up at 8:00 pm" He said.
He`s waiting for you to greet him but nothing. He wonders if you forget what day it is. But no, you didn`t forget it, it`s is a special occasion for the two of you.
"Okay baby" you smile sheepishly at him.
Tomorrow is your 3rd anniversary and you`re more than happy to celebrate it with him.
-*-
You wear your favorite black dress, Which goes above your knee and perfectly hugging your curves.
"Tonight is the night Y/n, no need to be nervous" You said to yourself at the exact time you heard a car honk outside your house. You hurriedly go downstairs and you see Jungwoo leaning on his car with a bright smile.
"You look gorgeous as ever, babe." He said before opening the car door for you.
"Where are we going tonight?" You asked him still acting like you forget what day it is today.
"At the club, they are waiting for us today are you sure you didn`t forget anything?" he tried to point out and he`s so obvious that he`s looking for an answer.
"No why?" you asked.
"Nothing" he smiled and you wonder how long you can keep up with this thing.
"Baby we`re here" Jungwoo said and he gets out of the car to open the door for you.
"Thank you" you kiss him and the two of you go inside the club.
"What's up dude!" you heard mark greeting Jungwoo with a fist bomb.
"Y/n! Y/n" You heard Joy and Irene calling you by whispering your name.
"Tonight is the night there`s no more turning back since today is a special occasion for you and Jungwoo." Irene said and she gives you a teasing wink.
"I know that`s why I`m all dolled up today" You said and you met Jungwoo`s intense gaze. To the point that you can`t help but blush, you approach Jungwoo and he opens his arms for you to hug him.
"Happy anniversary baby I love you so much" And he pulls you into a more tight hug you can`t help but smile while inhaling his manly scent.
"I thought you forgot about it" He leaves a kiss on your forehead and you look up at him.
"I would never forget this day Jungwoo, this is a very important day for us" You smiled and he let go of you to grab a drink.
"C`mon guys let`s have a toast for the two love birds here!" Jaehyun said making Mayjun stifle her smile because of Jaehyun`s cuteness.
You raised your glass too for everyone to follow when the guy that is with Seohyun said something disrespectful that makes Jungwoo`s blood boil in anger.
"Who is that sexy girl?" The guy said at Seohyun.
"Oh, that? she`s Y/n. Now, can we stop talking about her it`s annoying
"She looks sexy I wonder how good she is in bed" The guy said.
Jungwoo heard it and that is his breaking point he grabs the collar of the guy making everyone shocked.
"What did you just fucking say!?" Jungwoo asked and he can`t control his emotion and everything happened so fast. The guy punches him and the guy got punch by Jungwoo and he fell to the ground.
Doyoung and Jaehyun quickly hold Jungwoos Shoulder to stop him from fighting the guy.
"Babe, Calm down" You look at him worriedly and the little cut on his lips is bleeding.
"Watch your man!" The guy said with a perverted gaze on you.
"You should watch your mouth!" Jungwoo fights back and he tried to remove Jaehyun and Doyoung's hands on him. And he did it, he punch the guy for one last time before grabbing your wrist to run away from the crowd.
Your friends look confused but they managed to block the guy that is ready to chase the both of you.
"Kim Jungwoo!" You warn him but his giggles echo through the halls and you laugh with him while happily running.
"How can you laugh right now when you`re completely hurt?" and the two of you stop in front of the elevator and you go inside it. He looks at you as if you`re his whole world.
"Because I`m always happy when I`m with you" He drags you into a room and you`re heavy breathing right now.
"I checked us in, in this hotel we can rest here for the night and also that door." he point to a white door. “It is connected to Jaehyun`s and Mayjun`s room so it`s easy for us to communicate and their room is connected to Johnny and Yoona`s room.” He said and kisses you on the lips. You`re not even shocked at why he knows the hotel  so well, it`s because cause he owns it.
"C`mon I`ll treat your cut on the lips" and you drag him in the bathroom to clean it.
You lean more closer to him, even though the two of you is dating now for three years he's always fluttered when ever you`re being affectionate. Just in time he quickly pulled you into a passionate kiss making you shocked.
"Nobody`s watching I got you all alone no Interruptions, it`s hard for me to hold my own and hold back" He said and his forehead is leaning to mine.
"Tonight I don`t want you to hold back baby" You whispered in his ears seductively.
"Before we hit the road if you ain`t ready to go, just tell me that you`re sure." He said with sincerity in his voice.
"Tonight you can do whatever you want" You said back.
"Just wanna make sure, you`re sure" He smiled and he's now touching your legs slowly.
"Remember when you said to me that "If you wanna spend the night when the time is right". That night is tonight baby" You hold his hands slowly guiding them to your waist.
"The distance between you and me, is it okay this close?" He asked you while slowly taking his time to understand what`s happening right now.
"I will keep up with your step, so nothing to worry about" He added.
With that, he kisses you passionately everything about the kiss says it all. Love, lust, and needs.. Jungwoo carries you to the bed and he loosens the tie of his suit.
"Ain`t no pressure but we can keep this right here if you want me to stop baby" He said again. Oh gosh, why does he always ask for your consent.
"Tonight I`m so tired of making you stop and denying you baby so there`s no turning back" The softness and neediness in your voice are so obvious.
"If you`re down and you`re ready to rock, I`m not gonna make you stop." He replied seductively making you bite your lips in anticipation.
"I can`t hold back now baby" He said.
"Then don`t hold back" you said.
"That`s it, enough talking, and let`s do this"
He covers the two of you with the blanket and he makes sure that his name is the only thing that will come out of your beautiful lips.
Meanwhile, in the other room, someone is complaining.
"What the fuck!? I know that my two best friend is enjoying their time but I need to sleep too" Mayjun said covering herself with a pillow making Jaehyun laugh at her.
"Shut up Jung Jaehyun!" And he did stay quiet.
"Okay, now I have an idea mayjun to make you sleep" Jaehyun peppered Mayjun with kisses.
"Oh, shut up your horny ass jaehyun!" and mayjun throws the pillow at him.
"C`mon Kim Jungwoo! I swear shut the fuck up!" Jaehyun yelled so that you and Jungwoo can hear them.
-*-
You and Jungwoo laugh at them and you clean yourself and change with new clothes.
"I`m sorry! you can now sleep peacefully!" You yelled back at them making Jungwoo laugh and nod his head a little.
"Thank you, babe, or else my boyfriend won`t stop bothering me" Mayjun yelled making the four of you laugh.
"Let`s sleep now baby you must be tired because of daddy" Jungwoo said with a smirk.
"Stop with the dirty jokes Kim Jungwoo" you slap his arms playfully.
"Okay, okay good night I love you" He said with sweetness in his voice.
"I love you too baby only you" and you kiss him on the lips.
Consent is one of the most important things in a relationship and you`re lucky that you have Kim Jungwoo the one and only man of your life and will always be. And that`s how your constant or endless love relationship with Jungwoo last more than you could Imagine.
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human-enthusiast · 3 years ago
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Absurd Person #1 - Monkey D. Luffy (kid)
 Let’s start with not only the main protagonist of One Piece but also the first character to give Luffy any sort of injury...
...his dumb, seven-year-old self...
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*Disclaimer: I don’t own this image - screenshot from Episode of East Blue
The last time I wrote this, I forgot to hit save and my browser just reloaded the page and lost everything. After that I just went “I’m done” and rage quit Tumblr for the night (which I normally don’t do). That’s how my Sundays usually go😒🥴
Now Onward!
Basic Classifications
Real World Ethnicity/Nationality: Brazilian
Class: farm / country / lower class
Culture (the one he grew up around): Dawn Island - Sea-side village
Fishing community
Farming / Ranching community
Hard work ethic
Small and close community members; relatively friendly; little to non-existent conflict
Selective mix of being open towards strangers (especially with merchant vessels for better trading opportunities) and weariness towards those they expect to be harmful (likes Pirates; I’d imagine the people of Windmill Village were understandably unnerved with the Red-Haired Pirates first showing up).
Core values (personal to Luffy): pride, physical strength, adventures on and outside his home village,
Relation to authority: neutral - shifting slightly towards negative (no clear basis of opinion; can only go off on Luffy’s fascination with pirates as the main viewpoint)
(The added information feels a little scatter-shot but figured I give it a try based on little information from the manga panels and how it lines up with real-world similarities. Most information is based on logical speculation and could change with new information in later chapters.)
I know that the Romance Dawn arc consists of the chapters up until he meets Coby and Alvida (I think...), but the depiction of Luffy’s character in the first chapter seems different from when he is seventeen and setting out to sea. So, I’ll treat kid Luffy as a separate character for the first analysis.
First Impressions and Introduction
Now, I am an anime watcher, first and foremost, so my first impression of this character stems from the Anime. My introduction towards this ball of chaos was when he popped out of a barrel, that he put himself into after realizing that a whirlpool suddenly appeared (how he missed it? - It’s Luffy), and then inexplicably took a nap in. That was the absurd reason I was able to stick with One Piece in the first few arcs (until Baratie became one of the major reasons I stuck with it - I’ll explain why when we get there).
And since the first chapter was used for episode four in the anime, I was already somewhat familiar with how the story started and who Luffy was as a kid. However, reading the first chapter felt....different than what I would’ve expected. And because the anime cut out a few details from the chapter, there definitely are some things to take from kid Luffy at that point.
So my first impression was, as follows:
The kid is unhinged...That explains some things...
Complete wild child of a backwater village from Day 1. 
LIKE-- The anime episode DID NOT explain how he got that scar and the guy didn’t bring it up ever. To be fair, that wasn’t a big focus because the anime didn’t make it a focus. Reading that part though did more for his character and a little of his upbringing, through speculation, making it a rather slow-building but also fascinating introduction into this series.
Just a bit of an add-on, but if the manga introduced Luffy in the same level of neutrality as what the Anime did, It may not have fully made it clear if Luffy was going to be the main protagonist. Then again, it’s a shounen manga, maybe it was rather obvious to everyone else. Regardless, his introduction served to 
(1) Make his entrance memorable
(2) Establish his character that could either compare or set him apart from his teen self.
(3) Act as a sort of precursor towards the introduction of Luffy’s world and upbringing (which isn’t completely established until the last few arcs of Pre-Time Skip)
Personality
The best way I could describe Luffy at this point is a stereotypical kid...
Energetic, short-tempered, adventure-seeking, easily impressed, and ignorant...
That last description is actually something I brought up in a separate post about the “Fluid themes” of One Piece. Because I found that a small but overarching part in many (almost all) themes and world issues that One Piece reflects has some level of unawareness or apathy. Jimbe put it best during the Fishman Island Flashback when they found Koala (paraphrasing)
“They are afraid of us because they don’t know us.”
Know us referring to acknowledging them as people on the same level as humans.
Because of that and plenty of other instances from the East Blue, it can be a potential center for many characters who go up against or wish to explore the world and find that they are a frog in a well.
And that’s what kid Luffy represents. A rather aggressive frog in a well that wants out.
Granted, he is a seven-year-old, whose schooling has a closer equivalent to the 16th and 17th centuries of our world, living in what appears to be a farming community, so I’d imagine his education only focuses on at least the basic levels of reading/writing, mathematics, etc. A small, unexciting farming village probably has more concerns over their melon crops rather than what the world has going on. Adding in Luffy, you get a kid who dreams about being a pirate and adventuring outside the isolated village, making him avidly interested in a world he has no experience with. Or in a world he thinks is all fun and games.
That’s pretty standard for any child that has a mild and peaceful life. No doubt Shanks and his crew would tell him stories about their adventures. Not as a sort of attempt to make him a pirate, but because he was easily entertained by it, building up this expectation with stereotypical pirate personas. And whether he has his “destructive” tendencies before they became a fixture in Windmill Village, they definitely seemed to amp it up enough for Luffy to try and prove he was “man enough” to be a pirate at seven years old.
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Then when you add in this idealistic expectation with the selfishness of a young child, it creates an opportunity to learn. Because, as any kid may go through, will find that their fantasy of the world won’t be what they expected, and will often react negatively. Luffy’s expectation of Shanks is that he is the strongest man worthy enough to be a pirate.
Now, Luffy’s view of a “real man” stems a lot from this stereotype of men solving their problems through fighting only. Which also embodies this rather damaging philosophy of never running away or backing down from a fight (which I refer to as stupid bravery - something that comes up in a certain other character).
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The amazing thing about all the combined aspects of this kid is the ability to create a learning lesson for Luffy. Which can become a motivational factor in his pursuit as a pirate.
His easily impressed nature makes it known both when the Red-Haired Pirates talk positively about piracy adventures and when Shanks leaves the village. The difference between the moments can be showcased by the difference in determination and will to make an effort to achieve his dream. As he declared he wants to be King of The Pirates, he sets himself to work at it, rather than try and go with others.
How He Shapes the Story / World Around Them
I don’t know if anybody else made a similar connection (I wanna say someone DID but I can’t remember where) but in combination with Luffy’s general enthusiasm growing up hearing wild stories, his narrative reminds me so much of Don Quixote De La Mancha.
It’s been a while since I last read that story-- and by read I mean translate some paragraphs from Spanish to English during my Spanish I class in freshman year of high school. Nonetheless, I thoroughly enjoyed the story. Part I entails an old man who, after indulging himself with various stories of knights and valor, decides he wants to partake in his own adventures. Under various delusions and misadventures, his story becomes a rather well-known one.
Don Quixote was called the first “modern book”. That was something my Spanish teacher mentioned regarding its acknowledgment by the world and always stuck with me. It was one of the first stories of the early medieval period to focus on a regular man. Other stories before this tended to be about legends, gods, demigods-- individuals who often were referred to as legends because they were born into high status (often above humans). Either through original texts (often for religious purposes) and then through varying interpretations (such as the Arthurian Legends), these tales were a part of the status quo.
Kid Luffy is a person that reflects so much of the Don Quixote story (And not just because his village has windmills-- the most iconic scene about the knight’s story). He is that simple, normal boy that longs for his own adventures when there seemingly is already a well-talked-about story about someone who achieved infamy. In place of that is a man named Gold Roger whose execution we see in the manga’s opening. At this point, we don’t have much understanding about how it impacts the world as of yet, we just know it is setting up for something significant to the story.
Luffy becomes that “regular” person from a small-town with big expectations for a grand adventure.
That perspective can slowly build into the story by starting in a simple setting with a character going through one of the first dynamic changes in his life. Luffy’s experience with Shanks’s sacrifice sets a course in his own adventure. A story that trails into a rather bonkers adventure at the end of chapter 1.
His development is what shaped his world. It’s the way he learns when as it stems from the consequences of his actions. Especially ones where the smaller ones turn out to be very costly, making it a hard lesson that ingrains into the young kid. His actions created by his old ideologies sparked an intense reaction in the people around him. Especially Shanks, who felt he was worth losing an arm towards.
How The WORLD Shapes HIM
So, for the sake of the fact that kid Luffy’s “World” in Chapter 1 mostly consists of Windmill Village, I’m adding in Shank’s and his crew’s influence to extend and further give credence to his influence. Because, as of this point, Shanks represents a glimpse into the life of a pirate that Luffy strives for.
With Luffy being in a quiet environment all seven years of life, there is growth through basic schooling and healthy child development (theoretically since Makino seems to be the most likely one acting as his guardian), instead of doing things outside that norm. Now Shanks is the odd factor that creates new development into Luffy’s dreams and future ambitions. 
The crew’s stories, charisma, and connection towards the kid actively (and probably unintentionally) created a positive expectation if he chose to pursue his dream. While that sounds inspiring, there were also negative aspects. Such as driving his ignorance and impatient nature to seek it out too early in his life.
Shanks then became a mediator. Luffy often has mixed feelings with Shanks as the man begets a level of encouragement while verbally making fun of Luffy for being a kid constantly. Despite that, it doesn’t completely deter Luffy’s ambitions. All it does is slowly drop his high expectations in Shanks after the first bar incident. This is again done by his childish outlook of physical strength and bravery equating to his ideal of a real man.
With Higama, Luffy learns about real-world dangers, and how bravery won’t always be enough to win battles. The same can be said for physical strength but at that moment it doesn’t apply to Luffy. 
Shanks’ and the crew’s involvement helped Luffy’s views change. His expectations are fulfilled, which in turn reveal that he was wrong about them.
Finally, seeing Shanks’ sacrifice unfold drove Luffy into a pang of newfound guilt. By then, he was able to change one part of his world views from a childish fantasy into the beginnings of a mature way of thinking. 
He gains some level of patience. Along with a set goal to work with. Attributes which are identifiable with Luffy in the chapters last few panels.
Patience = Luffy took time to train and learn to set sail at age seventeen.
Set goal = Be King of the Pirates
Add-Ons
When I say that kid Luffy, after Shanks’ sacrifice, gained a level of patience, it is meant as a deduction during that chapter. By no means am I insinuating that it became a permanent trait for his character. Because as of chapter 1, all of Luffy’s personality has yet to be revealed.
And this will apply to other posts for various characters. They may behave in ways during or in response to a particular event but it doesn’t necessarily equate to that becoming a whole personality trait. Calling Luffy patient, with having full acknowledgment of his personality during the bulk of One Piece, is completely off. But, there can and will be moments where Luffy will act patient when he deems it necessary.
This is a little hard to articulate but I hope it makes enough sense.
🏴‍☠️🐒
After-Notes
Here’s my first attempt at this analysis. It felt scattered even after editing everything. Breaking down characters sounds easy (and most times it is) but articulating and connecting things takes a lot of work.
Here's to hoping it gets easier with the next character. And maybe shorter paragraphs.
Up Next: Shanks (East Blue)
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aethylas · 3 years ago
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For anonymous: a series of answers/clarifications/amendments on The Goldenrod Revisions! (I've answered these all in one post just to make it easier). Thank you so much for the asks, this helped me a) clarify my thoughts b) solve some canon continuity issues so I really appreciate them!
THANK U for agreeing to answer my questions! I'll have to ask them separately so they're not in 1 super-long impossible-to-read ask. I have 3 about 15x19, 1 about 15x20, 2 about 15x21, 2 about 15x22, and 2 about 15x23. quick disclaimer: i don't mean any offense at all by my question count! I didn't even notice these oddities the first time I read this; once I read it and accepted it as the true canon, I took a closer look and then noticed. but plz don't think these made your fic any less great!!
No worries anon! It is literally my pleasure to answer them and I am VERY very happy to find discrepancies with canon in the fic - then I can hopefully fix them and make the fic better :) Also I really appreciate the very systematic way you laid all these out, it really helped me reply, and also subsequently make a couple of edits to the fic!
For 15x19:
1. Why did Chuck trust Michael with the task of killing Jack? As God he should know Michael betrayed him in 15.08; did he expect Michael to disobey him again?
I think in this case we're/Chuck is relying on knowledge from the canon 15.19, i.e. Chuck would assume the outcome predicted by the show - that Michael WOULD betray the Winchesters/the world in order to please his father. So God assumed Michael would act the way he did in Inherit The Earth. But additionally, Chuck isn't actually very keyed-in to his own characters' motivations (esp. when love is involved) or very attached to certain results - he basically sends Michael and Lucifer to kill Jack because he figures it will entertain him no matter what happens - whether Michael and Lucifer kill each other, whether they kill the Winchesters/Jack, etc. - either Jack dies this way or Chuck will think of another way to do it.
2. How was Sam able to kill Lucifer? It was said only an archangel could kill another archangel with the archangel blade; was this a total lie or could Sam do it since he's Lucifer's true vessel? (plz don't change it to have Michael kill him; Sam being the one to do it was perfect, I just wanna understand how he could do it).
So glad you raised this because I honestly totally forgot! But now that you have, I have corrected that lore continuity with a line about biblical metaphors.
3. How is Rowena alive? She said she was dead in 15.08, so I initially assumed as a witch and the Queen of Hell she found a way to travel between Hell and Earth despite being dead. But then Sam says "Michael could've killed you" and then Chuck kills her twice in 15.21, both of which indicate she's alive here - does this mean Michael resurrected her when she summoned him?
God okay this is like - please call me out if this is incorrect or still confusing - but it's kind of like, based on the very inconsistent and confusing lore of the SPN afterlife that I assume Rowena is 'dead' but also 'alive' in the sense that Crowley was 'alive' and is now 'dead'. Does that make sense? She's not 'alive' as a human but rather as a demon (or something like it). So as Queen of Hell and a presumably demonic-adjacent entity, when she's 'killed' she gets sent to the Empty now vs. being 'killed' as a human and going to Heaven/Hell. (Based on when we see her in Hell, I assume she possesses her own body? Unclear. Just go with it. They've never been great with what it means to show vessels in Heaven/Hell etc.)
4. I thought asked all I wanted to know about Goldenrod but I just thought of 1 more thing: I don’t get why some dialogue implies Michael was dead? He mentions how he “found himself back on Earth” and tells the Empty it couldn’t stop Chuck from resurrecting him & Lucifer, but prior to 15.19 we last saw Michael leaving the bunker with Adam alive and well in 15.08, and it seemed like he was gonna stay on Earth for Adam’s sake. So what happened to him?
Oh that's a great point! I think that is actually just a confusing choice on my part that Chuck killed absolutely everyone including Michael/Adam in 15.18 Despair and THEN chose to resurrect Michael (but not Adam) alongside Lucifer when he was bored/wanting to kill Jack. I made some slight adjustments in-text to hopefully make it less confusing because I know that's different to the lore of canon 15.19 Inherit the Earth.
For 15x20:
1. How did the angels and demons in the Empty wake up? Did Michael use the last of his grace to wake everyone up? Were they already awake thanks to Jack blowing up in 15x18 or did they somehow sleep through that? (Not expanding on the Empty's claim that "you made it loud" is one of countless things I'll never forgive the actual show for, so THANK YOU for taking the show back to the Empty in the first place; I was just curious about this one element.)
So the Empty was already 'loud' according to canon, but since canon is vague on what exactly that means (thank you writers!...) I got the impression it meant the Empty wasn't 'peaceful' anymore but still powerful enough to suppress the beings inside, like the beings in there were awake and suffering but unable to rebel. Sort of what we see with Cas in this version of 15.20. Maybe like, additional suffering in sleep paralysis? Regardless, Michael does expend his grace to weaken the Empty enough that other beings wake up and/or are able to fight back and exist outside their own personal nightmare chamber. So whatever your impression of 'loud' is with regards to the other beings in there, assume Michael was able to free them from the Empty's control.
For 15x21:
1. Having Jack & Amara take out Hell & Purgatory was a BRILLIANT idea; I love that they ended all the places of suffering and changed the system. I just wonder - what happened to the souls and the demons still in Hell at that point, and the Leviathans and other monsters still in Purgatory? Were they just wiped out completely and sent to the Empty? Or did Jack turn them human and add them to the cycle? (I don't think the show clarified whether or not Leviathans have souls, so...)
No matter whether they were monster or demon or even angel, they would eventually be given human life. I broke it down to 'human enough souls' vs. 'not human enough souls'. Human-enough were immediately brought to life with memories and versions of their original bodies, and not-human-enough were sent to the Soul Queue to be born as infants. I assume Leviathan and most demons fall into 'not human enough', therefore, whatever tiny microbe of personality/soul they had was added to the cycle of rebirth and would be translated to a new human soul. Of course this might have a WILDLY different impact on the world depending on how many people go to hell in this system, how many people were 'human enough', etc.... But we're basically fudging those numbers a bit one way or another just to give certain characters the revival they deserve haha.
2. Did Cas drown and die after Chuck threw him in the lake and Jack left their limbo-dream world? If so, did he go through the same question-&-answer situation with Death that Sam & Dean did? Or was he with Jack & Amara when they rebuilt the world?
Cas was already dead/dying even when he was talking to Jack, he was sort of in a different version of the 'Veil' per se. VERY wishy-washy, but basically he and Jack were on a different dream-plane that they were jolted to in the chaos of the disorganised no-Death world.
I think Cas, Rowena, Lucifer, Michael, etc. as beings who were killed after the snap is a bit ambiguous. Rowena and Lucifer, I think, as entities who were demonic-dead or Empty-level-dead pre-Snap probably went through the reincarnation Yes/No Death questionnaire. Cas and Michael might not have since they were technically 'alive' and human before the Snap. Regardless, I think they probably wouldn't remember the interaction even if they had it.
The reason the question happened to the Winchesters AND that they remember it is Main Character Syndrome... they were the only people left alive when Jack and Amara did a hard reset, and that honestly Death took time to chill/exposition at them because he likes them. Really. Despite all appearances. Or respects them enough to let them know what's gone down, anyway.
Metatextually, it was really just to reaffirm to the audience that Dean (and Sam) want to live, in contrast to 15.20 Carry On 😅
3. Did all the snapped people (Eileen, Adam, the Waywards, etc.) also go through the Death question-&-answer process but not remember it, or did Jack & Amara just send them back?
Snapped people were reset automatically! Normally the new-humans also wouldn't remember their interactions with Death/reapers, just like in canon lore when someone like Dean has a near-death experience.
I realise this whole section and various other lore reformation parts of the fic aren't SUPER clear on specific logistics but on some occasions I'm like, I've done enough info-dumping, I don't want to overwrite exposition. But if you think it's worth clarifying certain points let me know and I can try to do so!
For 15x22:
1. The twenty something blonde guy in sunglasses getting hot tea, is that Belphegor? sure sounds like it but I wanted to confirm.
Yep!
2. Since Death mentioned that Jack only resurrected the angels, demons, and monsters from the Empty who had enough of a soul, and since all the human souls from the Veil went to Heaven as confirmed by Kevin's presence, how exactly are Anna's human parents and Bela alive now?
Great question - 1) I SOMEHOW FORGOT ANNA'S PARENTS DIED? Complete screw up on my part, I don't know how that happened. I fixed this so it's her grandparents now. 2) Bela was sent to Hell as part of her deal, so I was assuming she was a demon by this point in canon (since it would be... MANY Hell-years since she died.) Therefore she had a 'human' enough demon soul to be put back as a human.
3. Oh, and the tall woman with the flyer in 15.22; who is this supposed to be? Hannah I’m guessing?
To be honest I didn't have anyone in particular in mind for that scene; it was kind of a catch-all for missing characters like, it COULD be Hannah. It could be Raphael. Hell, it could be Abbadon. I didn't want to do a full shot of every single person missing from the cast who had died (esp since like - we wouldn't know who they were anyway! Their bodies would be different). So this one is literally just fill-in-the-blank. But if I had to assign a character there I'd say it would probably be one of the more arrogant angels like Raphael or Uriel.
For 15x23:
1. How is Bobby in the Roadhouse with the gang? 10x17 seemed to imply the angels were about to throw him in the dungeons to punish him for helping Cas; did Ash hack him out of prison, or was he never imprisoned at all? Also, is Jack not surprised to see another Bobby in Heaven because the boys already told him there was another Bobby besides the one he knows from Apocalypseverse? (I was half-expecting him to comment about that and confuse Bobby).
Oh that's a great point! I think that's another sort of fill in the blank since it's been five years since 10.17... even if he was in prison of some kind, I think it's likely either Ash helped him get out in the same way he helped everyone else, and since the angels were extremely short-staffed I doubt getting Bobby suitably imprisoned/punished was their top priority. But honestly I'm not super clear on how the angels intended to punish Bobby, I don't think canon is clear either... like, We Just Don't Know.
Finally I'd like to know, has Sam proposed to Eileen yet by the end of the final episode? The script doesn't mention a ring on her finger, and as Sam's fiancee, I'd assume she'd also have carved her name on the table. Sam mentions the innuendos Dean has said "in the past year," so it's been a while since Jack's prayer scene, yet Cas says Dean & Claire's argument was the last time they spoke, and it doesn't seem likely to me that Dean wouldn't call Claire in a year given how close they are...
Nope! I think Sam is saying 'I'm going to marry her' as a declaration of certainty of his feelings and faith in the future, not neccessarily as something that immediately happens. With regards to 'in the past year', that referred to the period when Eileen was alive during s15 as well! I assume Dean did teasing off-screen (and I mean, he did plenty on-screen too.)
I honestly think that Sam and Dean are just very very busy in the aftermath of the events of the 15.20 reset, like they have to deal with the new world AND try to wrangle all these hunters into this new system of collaboration. I didn't put Eileen on the table because she isn't there in the finale and because I do think the Sam/Dean/Cas/Jack family unit was a bit more central and important to the show, but maybe they add her (and any possible kids, if they have any) later on. God, imagine generations of hunters and/or Winchesters carving on that table. Sacred Artefact...
(1) Ok that's all the questions I have. Again, so sorry to blow up your inbox - I really appreciate your willingness to clarify these things! If there are some things you'd rather not explain and leave ambiguous, I totally get that. And in spite of these aforementioned confusing parts, I still ADORE your fic and will continue to read it whenever I feel like re-"watching" how Supernatural really ended! Thank you so much!! .... (2) I’m SO sorry to overload u! I know I asked a lot and I didn’t mean to sound like a hater saying “none of ur story makes sense”; that’s not what I meant at all! If this was a regular good ol fix it fic I wouldn’t have said anything but since u said u wanted it to wrap up the show as replacement canon, I thought maybe I should point out places that didn’t line up. But take as MUCH time as you need! Good for you working to meet your deadlines; I hope you succeeded!! And again I really appreciate you taking the time to answer whenever you have time—absolutely no rush!! Have a GREAT Memorial Day Weekend!!!
Anon thank you SO SO much for all these questions, as you can see it really helped me identify problems or straight up errors in my work wrt continuity and I'm so happy that means I can improve it. If any of the answers weren't clear or you think I should modify the fic to make certain things clearer than they are right now (other than the things I said I'd fix in-text for sure) let me know! It's really been a pleasure answering them too, I'm sorry it took me so long to get around to it, I actually went back and proofed/edited the whole fic as part of adding some of these corrections in (and that took like... three weeks...) and as you said, it's very important to me to get it as true to canon as possible so - yeah, just, once again, thank you!! You're wonderful! ♥♥♥
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tybunnyy-blog · 6 years ago
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Zabdiel de jesus- jealousy gets the best of him.
guys listen up, this is my first smut so yall better bare with me!! let me know what you guys thought!
disclaimer: smut, angst, daddy kink, choking kink and swearing.
Inspired by the song Loud(y) - Lewis Del Mar
His eyes watching you, his fist clenched and his veins almost popped out of his neck when he watched you through the window. Zabdiel couldn’t believe that you would disrespect him like this… the way you laughed with another man, the way you held onto him and the way you playfully hit him. He had just gotten back from tour, exhausted and not entirely sober yet from the party he had just gotten back from.
You had been best friends with your friend, Jonah for ages. Both knowing each other better than you know yourselves. You had always known that Zabdiel was the jealous type but you never had have to deal with it, tonight you were. You were laughing at a joke Jonah had made when you heard the door slam and Zabdiel making his presence known.
You smile and get up going to the hallway. “Oh hey baby, how are you?”  you say as you walked to your boyfriend to kiss him for the first time after 6 months.
“Hmm hola” is all you got ,before being pulled in for a kiss that felt very forceful. “god i missed you so much baby” he said in a fake sweet voice, his jealousy was easily read from his face. He walked right past you to get rid of his bags, leaving you confused behind.
As you walk out of the hallway you see a awkward scene unfolding in front of you. “Oh hey Zabdiel, how was the tour man?” Jonah got up awkwardly.
“I think we should continue our chilling session another” you smiled, deep inside you were very nervous. You don’t want Jonah to go but you don’t to upset Zabdiel more.
“Yeah sure.. Uhm love you Y/N text ya later?” as he gives you a kiss on the cheek and goes to the hallway to grab his coat. When after a couple of minutes you hear the front door close. You clear your throat as you look at Zabdiel. His face speaks a thousand words, he is clearly upset but you just didn’t get it.
“Sooo how was the tour bebé?” trying to break the silence, all you get was a scoff. What was he so upset about? What had you done? You get no answer. Now you were just totally done with him. As you try walking you feel hands pulling you back. You feel hot breath down your neck, wanting to be closer you push yourself against him. You feel his boner against your ass, you know he fucking worships it. Moving your hips up and down, you feel his breathing hitching. You feel yourself getting excited for him, a pool of wetness gathering in your panties. The grinding gets more and more heated. As you turn around you see his almost black eyes.
Out of nowhere he picks you up and puts you over his shoulder.
That was it, you are outraged. “What The Fuck Zabdiel PUT ME DOWN NOW!!” you scream from the top of your lungs. He completely ignores you and starts walking to your shared bedroom. You try absolutely anything to get of his shoulder but he is just to strong.
When he reaches the bed, he just throws you on there.
“You have fucking anger issues Zabdiel” you fold your arms over each other. Zabdiel keeps pacing around the room. “Y/N i do not want to hear another word from you till i say you can” he speaks for the first time since he entered the house. The way he said it only made you more turned on. Maybe i should see how far i can go? You think to yourself. As you walk up to him and start kissing his neck. He stood stiff not wanting to see weak, you felt his hard on growing even bigger.
“But Zabdiii I didn’t do anything wrong, please daddy-... i just wanted to hang out with the guy nothing else” as you make it down his neck, in your head you are smirking. You are gonna get exactly what you want, he had a weak for you and you were gonna play that out on him. “You have been a very very bad girl Y/N-  fuck i am afraid im gonna have to punish you” his hands move slowly up your body.
Stopping at your breasts as he starts to massage them, hating yourself for wearing a bra. Wanting contact and just to make him make you feel good. You moved you body further into his hands. As he sucks your neck, feeling bruises form. Moaning in distress wanting to feel more .“Patience babygirl” he whispers against your skin .
His hands travel back down to the hem of his oversized sweater that you were wearing. Moving it up your body much to slow for your liking. “Please-.. I need more daddy” you whisper softly, closing your eyes. When your top is off you start to feel exposed. He looks you up and down your body, licking his lips. He takes his hands and moves it from your thigh up your crotch to your neck. As he closes his hands slightly you feel your mouth fall open. “Tell me Y/N who the fuck you belong to” He watches you and realises how lucky he is your pretty neck stuck in his hand, your amazing eyes wide open for him and your mouth fallen slightly open. What’s more sexual than laying your life in someone else’s hands…
“You , daddy only you” left your mouth more as a whine and Zabdiel was snapped back to earth. His dick was now throbbing in his pants, realizing if he kept going like this he would cum untouched.
“Babygirl i need you to get on the bed on all fours, can you do that for me?” he whispers in your ear. That could have made you cum right there and then, you don’t hesitate before practically sprinting to the bed. You know better than taking off the rest of your clothes. He loves to see you on all fours with your ass sticking up and your pretty yoga pants. As you get on the bed your head facing the headboard, all you can do listen… you gasp as you feel him putting something over your eyes, a blindfold.
You had told him that you wanted to explore each others kinks just a little bit more. Resulting in you telling him that you wanted to try bondage, he had said that he would try it when he felt like the both of you were ready. He had planned it all out in his head when on our as well as buying all the things he needed.
You feel him fasten it around your head and his hands slit down your body, feeling your curves. Moaning at the feeling you tried to speak up “please daddy i need something!”. He gave your ass a firm slap “Daddy told you to stay quiet baby, why do you gotta keep misbehaving damn girl”
With that he flipped you over so you were laying on your back. In one swoop he took off both your pants and underwear. He starts kissing your thighs, leaving the marks he finds to be so beautiful on his babygirl. He moves his mouth up and you fist the sheet so hard your knuckles are turning white. His fingers finally touching where you wanted him most moving up and down your folds.
“Hmm bebé are you all wet for me?” you not wanting to disappoint him stayed silent.
“Such a good girl, always listening to daddy just to please him” after that he put focus back on your puss. Suddenly you feel his teeth biting gently into your clit, it send a shockwave through your body. Slowly massaging it between his teeth, his lips touching in exactly the right places. He adds his tongue moving it in circles, up and down. You felt one of his fingers entering you moving inside of you. Adding another wanna you start grinding back on it. You couldn’t help but wanting to moan. Feeling yourself forming that familiar knot in your stomach. Zabdiel feels your walls clenching onto his fingers.  you grab onto his arm almost to ask for permission to make a sound. His mouth leaving you, fingers still stuck inside of you.
Moving up to your mouth kissing you deeply.  Whispering in your pretty ear “Let me hear your pretty noises, ¿Te gusta cuando te la acaricio con mi lengua?” you immediately moan out. Deep grumbles coming from down below, he smiled at you being pleased with himself. "méteme la verga, por favor” you don’t have to ask twice before you feel his cock between your folds moving it up and down. You didn’t even know that he had undressed himself.
You let a porn star worthy moans out, surprising both of you. “Ahh fuck- give me something daddy” you feel him stop between your legs. Almost losing it when you hear the short but powerful “beg”. That’s when you forgot everything except you and him.
“Oww please daddy i just need your big fucking dick, i just need you to split me in- ahh fuck”
He slams into you with a master speed. Holding your hands above your head with one hand and the other holding your hip like his life depended on it. Him pounding into you filling you up completely and pulling almost out before slamming back in with an extreme force. “Let me hear you baby, scream my name please” you don’t waste anytime.
“Fuck daddy you make me feel so- oh right there… you make me feel so amazing. Only you, no one ever fucked me like this” meeting up with his movements, wanting to touch him so badly but being unable . Both of your movements becoming sloppy, both being close and wanting to cum. That’s when his hand leaves your hip and picks your legs putting it over his shoulder. Your head started spinning, feeling yourself getting close. “I’m gonna c-” “me too baby, wait till i tell you to” you moan in frustration. His thrust getting deeper and faster chasing his orgasm. Your mouth falling wide open knowing you wouldn’t last very long. “Okay babygirl, cum for daddy” your orgasm hits you hard, meeting each others thrust just right. “i m gonna cu- ahhh” you let your juices flow letting the most disgusting moan. It only takes a couple thrust before he fills you up with his cum. He drops onto his arms, taking off your blindfold.
Smiling as you finally see his smile.He starts kissing your face, first your cheeks, eyelids and lastly your lips. He rolls next to you and cuddles onto you. You smile and look at your amazing boyfriend one more time before kissing him.
“You should get jealous more often ZabDaddy” you grin at him, sticking out your tongue. As you see his face turn harsh again. But then a smile creeping onto his face.
“Fuck how lucky i am to have this amazing women all for me, no need to be  jealous anymore”
"well we'll see about that"
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fluidityandgiggles · 6 years ago
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Sleep Is For The Weak - Chapter 16
Previous Chapters: Prologue, Chapter 1, Chapter 5, Chapter 10, Last Chapter
Writing Masterlist - for previous chapters not otherwise linked, Read on AO3
Notes (I guess): I realize it took me way too long to do this, but I can explain. Uhh...
So for those of you who don’t know, I haven’t been home since September, and I won’t be home for another... two weeks, more or less? I’ve been to places where I couldn’t know if I’d have working wifi or any wifi at all so updating this fic has been a mission. So I do whatever I can to update at reasonable times.
With that being said, I finished this chapter way back last month while on a two week long trek in Nepal and haven’t had the opportunity to upload it, so I’m grateful I can now. Because this one... was a hell of an exposition ride for a lot of shit I planned a long long time ago.
Quick disclaimer - some bits of this chapter deal with the definition of transgender, and a specific learning disorder. The definition of transgender mentioned in this chapter has been taken from the DSM-IV-TR, which is a defunct edition of the DSM that came out in the year 2000 and has been replaced by the DSM-5 in 2013. The definition has since been changed and separated, and I believe it is now called gender dysphoria, though I’m not quite sure. But it does not reflect my opinions on how dysphoria is related to being trans, I do believe (and have several sources to back me up, including the DSM-5) that you don’t have to be dysphoric to be trans. The same goes for this learning disorder, what is said in this chapter reflects only the way the characters think of it - and it will change later on, I can assure you - and not at all what I would think or say about it.
As is tradition, thanks to @whatwashernameagain for KHS and for all her patience with me and my shenanigans (and not getting frustrated with my stupid ideas) and to @broadwaytheanimatedseries for the original idea and for giving me the best commentary for my screenshots when I send them. And also to @winglessnymph , @asleepybisexual and @anony-phangirl , who have fallen out of the loop but are still there. I know I haven’t sent you anything much in recent days, but... still.
Tag list (sort of): @bunny222, @ab-artist, @sweet-and-sour-shadowling, @ilovemygaydad, @your-username-is-unavailable, @virgilcrofters, @violetblossem, @maybe-i-like-the-misery, @book-of-charlie, @thatsanswitch, @thatrandomautist, @thebiggestgaypirate, @marshmallow-the-panda
(Wanna be tagged? Lemme know!)
Trigger warning: period appropriate transphobia (the early 00s were not exactly trans-friendly). This chapter also includes (rather controversial) opinions/ideas about the definition of transgender (as mentioned in a now-defunct, but then the most recent, edition of the DSM), discussion of abortion, mentions of past self-harm, discussion of personality disorders and hospitalization, panic attacks, and description of rejection sensitive dysphoria. I’m pretty sure I forgot something though, so let me know if I have so I can add it.
—————
Friday, May 30th, 2003
"...your valedictorian, Jenna Miranda Wheeler."
"Class of 2003…"
New York was beautiful in May.
Sadly, that was not where Remy was heading today.
According to Linda, Stephen was going to go on a business trip for at least two weeks in June, starting late May. So Remy was invited over for the summer. Not his first choice, but Leah begged him to come and Emile said that it might be a good idea. But…
Spending more than a day at Linda's, combined with the knowledge that Jenna and India have graduated just a few days ago and Chris hasn't, was a good enough reason for Remy to feel shitty. And he did.
The main upside was that Georgia was beautiful in May too.
He managed to cheer himself up somewhat by thinking of the good things that happened this month - Emile's TOVA results (9/9 inattentive symptoms, 4/9 hyperactive-impulsive, definitely has inattentive type ADHD), India's name being called at graduation instead of her deadname, Jenna graduating valedictorian, his friends moving to Virginia and so on - by the time the taxi from the airport pulled up in front of the, by now, rather familiar house.
And then his stomach dropped.
Stephen was still there.
"Do you need help with those bags, Rebecca?" He asked, eyeing the massive, neon pink duffel bag and the incredibly heavy purple backpack that sat on the sidewalk near Remy as he tapped his foot nervously.
"Not from you I don't. Thanks for the offer, but… no thanks."
He was too proud to admit that the duffel was too heavy for him to lift and he could barely drag it, but he packed most of his clothes and books in it. Some were mailed home. But not most.
"That shit gotta be heavy as fuck—"
"I said, no thank you. Now, move out of my fucking way."
Leah was napping by the time he finally dragged everything inside, but Rachel was doodling in the living room, smiling brightly when she saw him come through the door. She abandoned her crayons and waddled all the way to hug him.
As much as he barely knew her, Remy definitely loved Rachel too.
"I'm going to daycare," she mumbled somewhat, trying to use words she didn't quite know yet. "You have to come!"
"You're such a big girl!" He ruffled her pigtails, picking her up. She was so light for a two-year old. "Going to daycare already?"
"Mmhm."
"I'm so proud of you!"
She just hugged his neck and babbled on about her friends and daycare, her hand flying and her almost falling from his hold. This was another happy thing to add to the list.
He wasn't happy. But this was happy. For now.
—————
Stephen left on his business trip at around seven thirty, and Remy took a huge sigh of relief. Leah also woke up from her nap a few hours earlier, all grumpy and upset for some reason, and Remy tried talking her into telling him why she was so upset.
Linda said it was because of the nap. Leah only got even more upset.
"Why am I here?" Remy asked during dinner, while Leah entertained herself (and he was sure she didn't notice much) and Rachel was almost dozing off. "We haven't had a single good interaction since I was five years old, Linda."
"Am I no longer allowed to want to be around my son, Remy?" She stung back, looking anything but as aggressive as she just sounded.
"I'll be honest with you, kid. I know you don't like me. I can understand why. But what I don't understand is why you're bringing this up in front of your younger sisters. They're too young for this to—"
"I saw a movie about penguins on TV," Leah started rambling. "They're really weird…"
The argument stopped just as quickly as it started, and Leah was allowed to go on and on about penguins bringing rocks to each other. So he proceeded to just glare at Linda, who helped Rachel eat her pasta. This was awful, this was absolutely the worst situation he could've found himself in, and… he just wanted out.
And he kept wanting out even as Rachel already went to sleep, Leah was busy doing her homework last minute, and Linda asked Remy to help her clean up.
"I'm only here because Leah asked me to," he almost hissed as he was tasked with packing the leftovers in incredibly familiar tupperware containers.
"I want to spend more time with you, Remy. I'm still your mother—"
"Well, you haven't acted like it, like, ever!"
Linda sighed, putting the plate she was holding in the dishwasher. "I don't want to sound like I'm making any excuses—"
"So don't make any."
"—but I was barely your age when I had you. This is no excuse, I'm not trying to say that I had no idea what I was doing because of that, but I sacrificed so much of my life to raise you!"
"You could've aborted me! You could've been smart and used protection in the first place!"
"Condoms aren't a fail-proof—"
"Face it, Linda. You never wanted me. You're not homophobic or transphobic for the sake of it, it's clear you have at least some level of respect to queer people. You just never wanted me in the first place."
The next plate she was holding broke in the sink. "How fucking dare you say that?!"
"I'm just saying—"
"I have never wanted something in my life more than I wanted you!" Her screams hurt Remy's ears, going as far as to make Leah cry in the other room. Linda immediately lowered her voice. "I know I've been a bad mother to you. I regret every decision I've ever made while I was married to your father, except being married to him and having you. And I've spent every day since leaving you and your father regretting my decisions, and wanting to make it up to you, but you kept pushing me away. How do you think that makes me feel, huh? Do you still think you're the only one who's been robbed of something in this relationship?"
"...you had Leah while you were still married to Dad" was all he could say. And he hoped he'd have the last word. "Was she a mistake too?"
Sadly, you can't always get what you want.
"Leah… is problematic. But she wasn't a mistake either. None of you are, and you can stop saying that. Whatever is wrong with her does not make her a mistake. Just as your gender identity disorder does not make you a mistake."
"No, you're right. It doesn't. It makes me transgender. A female-to-male man. You know those terms? Female to male, transgender? It's what people call it nowadays."
There was another long moment of silence as Linda cleaned up the broken plate and Remy finished packing up the leftovers, and Leah stopped crying.
It was a stressful silence. Very typical of home life with Linda Brigham-Hollander.
"...you may not have come at a time I liked," she sighed after everything, falling into a chair. Remy was ready to leave the kitchen, but this wouldn't let him. "I know we could've… waited a few more years. But you came when you did, and I don't regret that. You were never a mistake. I may have a hard time understanding… what… your identity. I'm trying my best to educate myself now, you know—"
"That's almost five years too late."
"I don't know what Leah told you about her school life, but whatever hardships she got understanding stuff—"
"She has no trouble understanding stuff as far as I can see—"
"Educational stuff. School material. She got that from me. Education comes harder for me, you may not know that. I was never the brightest student and I only completed my high school diploma when you were three years old. Don't get me wrong, this has nothing to do with you. But I couldn't learn when you asked me to. It felt like—"
"Linda, it didn't take Dad five years to be able to call me by my name and use the correct pronouns. Even if you don't mean it this way, this is bullshit to me. And I hope you get it."
And then he got up and left, leaving her to her own. If she cried, well… that's none of his business.
—————
Sunday, June 8th, 2003
Nathalie and Emile were getting ready for the Tony awards when Emile had a panic attack.
No, that's not true. Emile has been having panic attacks all week long for some weird reason he couldn't explain, most likely not being able to talk to Remy all week long since his phone died and he couldn't get a new one just yet. But today was the worst one. So Julie lent him her phone for a call, to explain himself so he won't panic so much, but…
But Remy wouldn't understand. He'd be mad if Emile tried to call him from Julie's phone because of some panic attacks… and then he'd hate him, and then… and then…
Then he wouldn't have a best friend anymore…
What was India's phone number again…?
She picked up on the fourth ring. "India McGinty—"
"It's Emile," he almost sobbed the second she picked up. "I… I have a question…"
"Oh, honey, of course. What is it?"
"Do you think Remy would hate me…? My phone died and I can't get another one until next week and—"
"Emile, are you… are you crying right now?"
"No… I did before, I just…"
She sighed before clearing her throat. That's it, she hates him too—
"Do you mind if I pass you over to Jenna? She's better at this than me."
"...okay…"
"...Emile?" Jenna's voice was softer than India's somehow. She'd never raise her voice, but Emile was scared of the people who'd be there when she does once she becomes a lawyer. "Can you please explain what's going on?"
"Well… my phone died, and I can't tell Remy because he's with his mom and I don't wanna call him while he's with his mom, so I'm scared that if I don't talk to him all summer he'll hate me and then he won't talk to me anymore and I can't—"
"Let's slow down, you're only upsetting yourself. Remy is your best friend, right?"
"Yeah… I mean, I like him a bit more but, but it's not like I can just tell him that, and…"
"That's fine, we're not gonna focus on this for now. That's for another time. But he's your best friend, right?"
"Yeah, I just told you!"
"So why would he hate you for something like that? He's going to understand, I'm sure."
"I don't… know… it just feels like he might…"
"I know. This feeling fucking sucks, doesn't it?" She chuckled. Emile couldn't answer to that. He just… he couldn't. "But it's not healthy to dwell on this feeling. It might become a self-fulfilling prophecy if you fret about it so much."
"What do you mean…?"
"...have I ever told you that I was institutionalized until my second year of college?"
He couldn't stop his jaw from dropping. "No…"
"Okay. So I'll tell you now. I… how squeamish are you? I don't want to… trigger anything…"
"I don't know… I don't… I don't think I really mind much…?"
"Okay, I… I'll censor it anyway. Is that okay with you?"
"Yeah."
"So when I was fourteen, I started harming myself. It's not… it was what you'd think, but not for the most part. I didn't cut really. But my parents knew, and they gave a ton of fucks and not just because they had a reputation to uphold like I thought they did back then. They just… they gave all the fucks."
"Okay… I'm sorry, I didn't—"
"Don't apologize, you had no part in this. And you never will. I promise."
"Okay."
"Two years after I started, my parents sent me to a psych ward. At that time they thought I was depressed, it was too early to diagnose me properly, so… I've lived for three years on doses of antidepressants that didn't do a whole lot, because nobody knew. I was finally diagnosed with borderline personality disorder when I was nineteen, my medication prescription was fixed and I was let out of there when they decided I'm doing well enough to be able to live on my own again. I spent my first year of law school with a nurse attached to my hip, can you imagine?" She laughed, and Emile struggled to hold back a smile.
"Actually yeah… my sister is narcoleptic…"
"Oh shoot, sorry… didn't mean that. Anyway… back to the topic at hand, yeah? I was… infatuated, for a lack of a better word, with this guy. His name was David. I thought I was in love with him, but it turned out I idolized him to a point where he became my favorite person, and that was an incredibly toxic experience. He was like… like Angelina Jolie in Girl, Interrupted. But dialed up to eleven. He was a fucking asshole and I haven't seen him in years… he was transferred to another place after an incident that involved one of my friends, she ended up almost killing herself because of this guy. And my anxiety over being perfect for him, over making him like me and making sure that he keeps liking me, made me extremely unhealthy in the long run."
There was a pause, possibly for Emile to process. Most likely. This wasn't fair… this was totally not fair! Why did good people have to go through shitty things?
"My next favorite person after him was a girl I dated for a couple months before India." Jenna sounded kind of breathless at that, as if she was crying herself. "And… she made me talk to her. She asked me questions for clarification all the time and helped me with my anxiety, especially when I felt like this. I was tiring, but… it's the effort she put into this that counted. Emile… you gotta talk to Remy."
"But… but I can't…"
"Who said? Communication is key. I know it might be really hard, especially for you, but… call him. It's his birthday soon, right? In July?"
"Yeah…"
"Call him. Write down everything you want to tell him and tell him then. I promise it'll make your anxiety a lot easier to manage."
————
"Remy," Linda called from the living room as he was heading to bed. This was becoming ridiculous…
"I told you, I'm not talking to you for the rest of this—"
"I can't read a single word in this cursed book of yours."
"...what book?"
"This DSM thing. Remy, darling, why do you need this book? It's so difficult to understand, couldn't they have written better books about this?"
He ended up not going to bed after all, instead resorting to making himself tea and going to sit on the couch next to her.
"Mom, that's… that's the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders, mom. It's existed since the fifties. This is the revised version. They can't make it simpler to understand, I don't think."
"Well, your grandma's always said that if a child can't understand what's written, it's because the writer is bad at what they're doing."
"And so have a lot of my professors, but sadly this is what we have to work with. What's so confusing anyway?"
"I was trying to read about your… your thing, the gender identity disorder thing…" she turned the book to him. The passages in this section have been highlighted the day he bought the book and he knew them by heart. Well, for the most part. "I'm sorry, but the words are just… long and confusing."
"...that's fine… it's totally fine, I can… I can simplify it for you…"
"I don't need you to simplify it for me, I know English. I just… I can't read this! Big and confusing academic paper words."
Oh fuck…
"I'm a painter, not an academic, Remy. I can't read. You know this. You've known this forever."
"I forgot you're dyslexic…"
"And what does forgetting that help you?"
"Nothing… let's… let's go over this together, okay? The sections that apply to me." He waited for Linda to nod, rather reluctantly, before putting on his own pair of reading glasses.
"So, to diagnose someone with gender identity disorder there are two criteria, identifying with the opposite gender and feeling dysphoria. In order to meet those criteria, you gotta not be intersex, which I think is pretty stupid, and also it has to affect your daily life."
"Yeah, I know that. Your shrink told us that when you were fourteen. Let's move on, okay?"
"...okay. In boys, aka trans girls, this doesn't apply to me… okay. Girls with GID, aka trans boys, display a intense negative reactions to parental expectations, blah blah blah, you never had any expectations of me so this doesn't apply…"
"No no no no no, you will read this out. No skipping."
"Okay, fine! Girls with GID display intense negative reactions to parental expectations or attempts to have them wear dresses or other feminine attire. Some may refuse to attend school or social events where such clothes may be required... They prefer boy's clothing and short hair, are often misidentified by strangers as boys, and may ask to be called a boy's name. Reminds you of something?"
"...go on."
"Their fantasy heroes, yeah no, I never had fantasy heroes…"
"You had She-Ra."
"Yeah, but she made me gay, not trans, mom. Prefer boys as playmates, contact sports… yeah, none of that either…"
"You used to play soccer as a kid. Your dad has a lot of pictures of that, you know."
"I… didn't actually know that… huh."
"You didn't learn to kick a ball from your father, though. I'll tell you that."
It took a bit of time for Remy to stop himself from giggling, deciding to sip his tea instead. It didn't work very well.
"Yeah… well… moving on, ‘they show little interest in dolls or any form of feminine dress up or role-play activity. A girl with this disorder may occasionally refuse to urinate in a sitting position. She may claim that she has or will grow a penis and may not want to grow breasts or menstruate. She may assert that she will grow up to be a man. Such girls typically reveal marked cross-gender identification in role-play, dreams and fantasies.' Does any of this sound familiar, mom? Because I don't… I don't actually know."
"Until now… yeah. All of that sounds incredibly familiar. Look, I…"
"I know what's you're gonna say, and please don't. It's fine. I know you panicked, I know you said things you didn't mean to, but… can we leave that for now? That's a bridge we're gonna deal with later. Now, adults with GID…"
They ended up staying up for far longer than either of them wanted to, but it was alright. Linda wanted to learn. Remy was willing to teach her.
They only barely made it to bed at three in the morning, the page bookmarked for tomorrow, when they'll continue reading.
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abunchofbadchoices · 6 years ago
Text
Michael's Song
HSS Michael x MC (Jordan) in Midnight Sun AU
*Disclaimer: Most of the lines and scenes I got from the movie the Midnight Sun and all the rights belongs to the creators and writers, as well as the characters from PB. This is merely a converted fan fiction*
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Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six
Part Seven
They let their feet guide them to wherever they go. The town is silent, but not in a creepy silence kind of way. Just the kind of quiet when you can able to clear your mind and feel at least a bit of peace.
Somehow, the two of them ended up by the shipyard which is, of course, empty at midnight. His uncle's boat was located to the private area, where most luxury boats and yachts are place. Michael got them in without problem as he had access to the gates and together, they walk down the path and passed by different kinds of boats.
The wind is cool, but not too freezing. Jordan's wavy blonde hair gets blown by the breeze from time to time but not enough to mess it. She looks at the dark sky, eyes closed in bliss as she inhale the fresh salty breeze coming from the sea.
Michael had been recording their little trip with his digital camera. Then smiles at the sight of happiness on her face, glad to have brought her to the place he goes to when he needs some peace, so he made sure it was all caught in the cam.
"I-I don't get it." Jordan suddenly turns to face him and the camera, blushing. "How could they just take your scholarship away?"
Ah, yes. Their latest topic of conversation : College. Michael brought her up to speed about what he has been doing, about football and about wanting to go into filming, when she noticed him recording the party earlier.
It was rare for him to tell a story, much less something that has left a bitter taste in his mouth, but there was something about Jordan that makes it easy to open up a little.
He paused the camera and looks down as they walk, his left shoulder suddenly feels like tingling at the memory. "Well, I had to have a surgery, and they didn't think I could ever play again. No more scholarship meant no more Berkeley. It was probably my only choice of place to go to, away from here."
Jordan nods slowly, understanding etched on her beautiful face. "I'm really sorry."
"Yeah."
He feels sorry for himself too, if he wasn't too busy thinking how he brought it all to himself, or how he was fooled by his so-called friend.
"So, how did you do it?" She asks deliberately, in a careful yet soft voice. "How did you hurt yourself?"
"It was just a freak accident. You know, I fell down some stairs and... that's not true." Michael paused, then stops to look her in the eye. He wants to see it in those innocent green orbs as soon as he tells her the truth. He wants to see the same judgemental gleam everyone gives him when they hear about it. "That's kind of what I tell everybody."
Jordan knits her eyebrows, an indication that she was being thoughtful and sympathetic. But she stays quiet and let him continue.
"I got really drunk one night at my friend Brian's house. It was his birthday and we're all having a drinking game, just the school team. We all agreed he can give all the dares and well... He dared me to jump off the roof into the pool. I clipped the edge with my shoulder." He let out a humorless chuckle, remembering his father's raging disappointment. His coach's regretful voice when he told him he can no longer play. "I'm such an idiot. I don't wanna be that guy, you know?"
A few steps passed. From the corner of his eyes, he noticed Jordan look up at him with a gentle smile. She shakes her head. "Then don't be."
That was all he needed to hear. He hates long talks about having faith and listening to fake promises that everything is going to work itself out.
There, Jordan doesn't seem to feel the need to promise or reassure him, she knows it was all out of their hands. It was her calming presence that gives all the reassurance he needed.
"You know," she starts. "My mom used to take me here when I was little."
"Really?" He smiles.
It was the first bit of personal story she ever shared that night. Jordan is a big mystery, giving very little information about herself or what she does every day. All she ever told him was that she isn't available during the daytime and as much curious as he is, he never asks 'cause he trusts her to tell him at some point.
Jordan points to a spot by the harbor, a huge cleared space overlooking the sea. "She sat me right... there. And, um, she tried to teach me how to play the guitar. Actually, this watch was hers." The girl held up her wrist, where a gold watch was wrapped and complementing her pale flawless skin. "I spent so much time looking at this thing on her hand, and..." Her smile turns wistful. "Uh, she died when I was little. She was in a car accident."
"I'm... I'm so sorry," Michael frowns, worried he had totally blew their night off. "You know, we can go someplace--"
"No. No, no." Jordan shakes her head quickly. "No, I'm...I'm good. "
"You sure?"
"Yeah, yeah. I promise."
Michael offers his hand. "You wanna see something cool?"
His uncle's boat was only a few meters down the pathway so Michael lead the girl to the private sailing boat where he practically spends all his time since summer starts.
"Ta-da!" He spreads his arms, jumping on board which sways gently on its spot.
Jordan's eyes widen. "This is yours?"
"No. But it's something I'm taking care of for the summer. It's a Jespersen 53."
"Wow..."
Michael reached out and she let him help her up to the deck as well. He watched her balancing awkwardly on her feet and smirks. "One of these days we could take her for a sail around the harbor. We can watch the sun set."
Jordan holds onto a metal support beam and smiles up at Michael. But the last sentence he uttered just registered in her mind and suddenly, she felt a huge lump on her throat.
Michael wants to go on sailing with her to watch the sunset. Out on the sea. It was probably the most romantic idea she ever heard if only she can be able to make it come true.
Which is impossible, unless she wants to achieve a grade-A cancer that will probably wipe off any chance of ever going to sailing ever again. Jordan pretends to watch the sea. She doesn't want Michael to see that she can never go with him on those trips. Not as long as there is sunlight involved. Hell, he doesn't even know what the main problem is.
Just tell him, dammit! Her mind and conscience keeps on scolding her.
No, no. She can't... She doesn't want to. What if Michael starts seeing her more like a fragile sick creature than the funny awkward Jordan he had always known?
"That sounds... perfect." She says instead.
Michael leans down from the elevated deck he is standing on and press his lips softly on her. Jordan reaches up and put his hands on his shoulder, pulling him closer as she responded to the gentle kiss in a deliberate manner.
You see, Jordan had never kissed anyone before, not this way. Surely, those kisses all over Maria's face that she used to give her when she feels like annoying her wouldn't have counted.
It feels like forever, their lips melting to each other like they were meant to be that way. A smile tugs the corner of her lips and when they pulled away, Michael has the same smile on his face.
▪️▪️▪️
Luckily, the pickup truck decided to die just a house away from the Lee's house.
The engine rumbled and groaned before completely stalling in the middle of the road. Michael fumbled on the steering wheel. "Um, just, let me get out of..."
He tries once more, there was a brief groan then the engine died all over again. Jordan grinned, studying the guy's face which looks a bit redder than usual. Oh, he's embarrassed. It only makes her smile for more.
"Sorry." He says, sounding sheepish but not at all surprised.
They sit in silence for a few awkward moments. Jordan bites her lip. "So, what are you gonna do this year, now that you're not going to Berkeley?"
"Well, first I'm gonna get a new truck." Michael quipped. They chuckle. "Or not, I have my motorcycle anyway. And then I'm gonna drive across the country. You know, I've been in the football field my entire life and I haven't get to see much else, so..." He looks at her, noting the downcast look on her face. The beautiful smile gone. "Um, what are you gonna do--"
"I'm not doing anything." Jordan says immediately, shaking her head. "I'm just gonna take some online courses, I think. But... I'll just be here." I cannot leave anyway, she wanted to add. I cannot go across the country or have vacation under the sun...like a normal girl.
"I, uh... I meant what are you doing tomorrow?" Michael clarified. The shock on the girl's face made him laugh.
"Oh, God..." She slapped her forehead, but she is also laughing. A hint of hesitation passed through her face for a second. "Um... I... I'm busy during the day, but I can be free tomorrow night."
"That's perfect. I'll see you tomorrow night?"
"Okay." Jordan flashed him with her signature beam before jumping out the door. She made it a few feet away before she stopped as if she forgot something and run back to the window. "I have something to tell you." Concern filled his chest at the look of panic in her eyes. She sighed heavily then let out a guilty smile. "I don't actually have a hamster."
Michael grinned, not at all surprised. In fact he didn't even try hide it. "No shit."
As if satisfied, the girl waved her hand then run to her house.
From the inside, Scott watched his daughter get off a blue pick-up truck. He glances at his watch and sees it was almost three in the morning. A couple more hours and Jordan might have reach the morning sunlight.
This was exactly what Dr. Maddox had warned him about. The age when his daughter will no longer be contained inside the house and meet people that will trigger some issue on her condition.
The truck isn't Maria's. Jordan didn't went home with her best friend just like what they always talked about.
He couldn't help but feel threatened.
▪️▪️▪️
That morning, Maria lies on Jordan's bed, with the latter has been using her stomach as a pillow while she strummed lazily on her guitar.
It was moments like this that she feels closer to the blonde. No parties, no other friends... No Michael. Just the two of them having a lazy morning with no plans to think about.
Last night had been the first time Maria really enjoyed a wild party. She threw caution to the wind and let herself lose, probably had drunk more alcohol than she ever had her entire high school years. It was also a bonus fun that Jordan adjusted rather quickly to the party and managed to gain some more friends.
And today, well, they have nothing to do.
A beep sounded from her phone and Maria put down her book. She opened the message and smirk at joke that was sent to her.
Jordan glances up, eyes narrowing suspiciously. She had noticed Maria had been texting a lot that morning. "Who are you texting?"
"No one." The dark-haired girl casually turns of the screen and dump her phone.
"Maria..." She put her guitar on the side of the bed and shifts on the bed to face her friend. "Who are you texting?"
Maria closes her eyes and winced at her soft voice then whispers almost inaudibly. "Caleb."
"Um? I can't hear you when you're whispering..."
"Caleb!" She repeated. Somehow she feels guilty for the other things that happened in the party. It is true that alcohol makes people lose control sometimes. "I made out with Caleb!"
Maria groans, face completely red as she buries her face on the pillows in shame. At some point during the night, in the middle of the dance floor, she and Caleb ended up dancing on a particularly sexy song. Then stuffs happen. After that Maria felt like getting sick because Caleb isn't exactly the one she was thinking off during their...uh, moment.
She tried looking for Jordan, but neither her best friend nor Michael were nowhere in the party. So she rushed to get home by herself.
Now, Caleb had been texting her all morning. However rude it might be, Maria admitted she wasn't attracted to him as she is already liking someone. Which led to the guy teasing her and coercing her to tell him who the lucky person is.
"No!" Jordan cooed, but her chuckles betrayed her voice. "He's really really really cute. And he totally likes you."
Maria stayed buried on the pillows and after a few minutes, she felt arms wrapping around her and cuddling her. The blonde nuzzles on the back of her neck, which tickles but she tried to ignore it.
"By the way," Jordan speaks close to her ear, her breathe sending shivers down her neck. "Can I tell my dad that I'm going over to your house tonight, so I can go hangout with Michael?"
What??
In a micro-second, Maria is sitting on her butt and looking at her best friend pointedly. "You're asking me to help you lie to your father so you can hang out with a guy?"
Jordan pouts.
"Ugh. I'm telling him you'll be having a sleepover to my house." She conceded anyway. She is totally powerless when it comes to pouts.
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flakandforay · 6 years ago
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Fake Love Analysis
this is the analysis for bangtan’s 3rd full album: Love Yourself 轉: Tear’s title track: fake love. 
i will be analysing several components - music, lyrics, aesthetics and choreography
disclaimer: this is just my personal opinion, feel free to disagree. do let me know your thoughts in my ask box
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overall: it is the start of a new era with bangtan!!!! who the hell isnt happy??? and let’s talk about quality voices and quality aesthetics, im sCREAMING!!!!!!!!!
teaser 1: this literally gave us hints to how the story is supposedly going to flow etc ( read my fake love teaser 1 theory here and fake love theory here )
teaser 2: honestly that teaser showed us the bridge yet again just like how they did for BST, spring day etc and going on with these motifs, thank you for blessing my ears and showing a glimpse of jungkook’s abs
music: anyway, diving right into the music !!!!!!!!!!
so the song starts off with Taehyung yet again, just like DNA, kudos to how there are more songs with Taehyung starting off!!! ( honestly going to wait for Seokjin yo start off more songs as well ). one could hear the electric guitar chords and this synthesized flute that being played possibly with the keyboard as well. it has this distinct synth as well that could be heard. it sounds really creepy actually if you hear the synth by itself, much like an empty in an eerie room, the whole impending ominous angst.
there was this brief pause at 0:12, before jungkook comes in to continue the opening verse. the same eerie synth underlying his vocals. this is where jungkook gets his ‘solo’ dance with these lines. i love how the way he sings here, he punctuates each word as if a sword is stabbing him each time he knows it’s fake love. then at 0:23, there are some murmurings of some lyrics, specifically ‘im so sick of’ ; most likely done by namjoon that becomes a lead in to the actual chorus led by jimin at 0:25.
interesting, jimin starts one count before a new bar starts as he dives into the chorus and sings with utmost desperation; as if he is crying out. i love how all the angst is on beat together with the percussion; it’s amazing. and then it allows the ringing of the beat to harmonize with the ‘love’ sang by jimin and seokjin. before seokjin takes over from jimin at 0:31, there is this brief pause of the vocals with the underlying beat still pushing through. yet somehow throughout the chorus, one could hear how there is this sort of ‘barking noise’ out of anger, definitely not snarling or growling though.
then at 0:39, namjoon’s verse comes in, but at the same time, it is together with jungkook as though jungkook is replying to him; much like they are having a conversation. i love how the beat simmers down to provide more emphasis onto namjoon’s verse and this style of rapping. one could hear the subtle synths and percussion throughout this exchange. then at 0:46, interestingly, there’s a slight change in synths that echo out. then there is that rumbling synth that signals the next part of the song which is hoseok’s verse.
hoseok being hoseok has to have an adlib before starting off his verse. hoseok has adapted a more distinct style of rapping - in a way by punctuating each and every word to make it sound like a staccato and not to mention, having the end syllables double by namjoon is what makes me love his part all the more !!!! then at 0:57, hoseok makes it a point to switch up his flow by rapping more words in his last few lines !!! this leads us to the iconic mirror move !!!!!!!!!!!! i love the desperation he evokes when he semi-shouts ‘누구니’. it becomes a huge contrast to the pulp coming prechorus at 1:03. yet between both namjoon and hoseok’s verses, there are these ‘tremolo’ synths that last about one count each underlying in both verses - a nice added touch.
so the prechorus starts with jimin yet again and one could hear the prominent electric guitar chords mhm, what a blessing to my ears. i love how there is a slight short contrast with hoseok’s verse but it doesn’t actually drop in volume but insteads build a steady crescendo to the chorus. even when seokjin takes over at 1:16, the same volume is there but builds up slowly and one would realize that the percussion is only introduced at seokjin’s part though one could be confused as to why there is sort form of percussion during jin in’s part is due to the bass notes of the chords.
i love when seokjin takes over because his voice has this additional layer of desperation that makes the song sound even more vulnerable and befitting for the theme they were going for. then at 1:26, we have that same murmuring of namjoon before the chorus comes in at 1:27 with jungkook.
now at the chorus, the volume is at full force. one could hear that there are several layers of synths that could be heard. then at 1:33, taehyung takes over momentarily. but when jungkook takes over again, like as though it’s a conversation, jungkook’s lines are actually doubled by someone else. moving on, as taehyung completes the chorus, that distinct synth underlies the whole chorus again and at the same time, once taehyung’s part ends, it becomes a lead in to the extended chorus with jimin and seokjin - not much has changed.
then the song moves on to namjoon’s verse at 2:05 and it opens with that same tremolo synth that is descending. interesting that namjoon’s verse is also in a way conversation style and that the ‘replies’ to his lines are also doubled most likely by jungkook. namjoon even managed to squeeze in an adlib of ‘oh no’ before he wraps it up.
then at 2:18, that same tremolo synth is being used as a lead-in to yoongi’s verse as he starts his rap.  yoongi knows exactly where to emphasize and namjoon helps to add extra emphasis by doubling on those parts. he even managed to squeeze in an adlib of ‘ooh’ with his vocal tone being much lower than his rapping one. love how he ended his verse as though he was just stating facts - a clear nonchalance if you will.
then the prechorus comes in again with jimin at 2:31, but there’s a slight difference in a way that there’s an additional layer of synth to distinguish it from the previous prechorus. also that the percussion is removed from jimin’s part and that there’s a clear keyboard synth being used. only when seokjin takes over did the percussion is reintroduced at 2:44.
then the chorus comes back in with jungkook at 2:54. however the difference here is that underlying jungkook’s part is jimin’s vocals. and instead of taehyung doing the next part, it’s jimin instead and one could hear the clear harmonization as well of the higher vocals. then at 3:10, one could hear jungkook harmonizing with his part as well with the word ‘bad’.
in the end, the extended chorus comes back around with jimin and seokjin. but then it ends with jimin singing the prechorus with taehyung doubling it to get a more fuller and contrasting sound at 3:37. the guitar being very prominent here as well. then the song ends with seokjin singing and jungkook harmonizing and doubling as well. it’s as if they repeated the introduction and it’s amazingly done well.
lyrics: i love these lyrics so much???? there’s so many innuendos here, and one could feel their emotions inside
널 위해서라면 난 슬퍼도 기쁜 척 할 수가 있었어 널 위해서라면 난 아파도 강한 척 할 수가 있었어
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If it’s for you I can act like I’m happy even when I’m sad If it’s for you I can act strong even when it hurts
honestly, i really think that these lyrics already show how much one was willing to give himself up/scarific himself for his loved one, he hides it all, putting up a mask; much like singularity; a facade, another persona possibly.
사랑이 사랑만으로 완벽하길 내 모든 약점들은 다 숨겨지길 이뤄지지 않는 꿈속에서 피울 수 없는 꽃을 키웠어
=
Hoping love will be perfected with only love Hoping that all my weaknesses will be hidden In this dream that won’t ever come true I grew a flower that couldn’t be blossomed
to think that these lyrics came out right at the beginning; already linking us to smeraldo; based on the smeraldo blog posts before, the smeraldo flower was a flower that was based off a myth; it didn't actually exist but because the greater loved someone so much, he made this flower - the same flower that is being referenced here. 
i love how they constantly link the lyrics back to how they are having some sort of facade; a mask on their real face to cover everything else. 
I wanna be a good man Just for you 세상을 줬네 Just for you 전부 바꿨어 Just for you Now I dunno me Who are you?
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I wanna be a good man just for you I gave you the world, just for you I changed everything just for you Now I dunno me Who are you?
here comes the verse of Namjoon, and honestly this is great. i love how he shos how much he sacrificed himself to the point he doesn't recognise himself anymore. yet, this idea is brought over to hoseok’s part. 
우리만의 숲 너는 없었어 내가 왔던 Route 잊어버렸어 나도 내가 누구였는지도 잘 모르게 됐어 거울에다 지껄여봐 너는 대체 누구니
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In our forest, you weren’t there I forgot the route that I came on Now I don’t even know who I used to be So I ask the mirror, who are you?
again, the idea of losing oneself for another; much like the lyrics in Taehyung’s intro: singularity, right here. 
but the fact that the lyrics of using the ‘mirror’ adds another layer of nuances inside; saying that one wouldn't recognise their own reflection either. 
그 호수에 내가 날 버렸잖아 내 목소릴 널 위해 묻었잖아
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I left myself behind on that lake My voice was buried for you
나는 날 잃은 걸까 아니 널 얻은 걸까
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Did I lose myself? Or did I gain you?
Reference: Colour Coded ©
the idea of losing oneself is brought over from Singularity to Fake love. 
Love you so bad, love you so bad 널 위해 예쁜 거짓을 빚어내 Love it’s so mad, love it’s so mad 날 지워 너의 인형이 되려 해
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Love you so bad, love you so bad For you, I’m enacting a pretty lie Love it’s so mad, love it’s so mad I’m erasing myself to become your doll
this chorus is amazing, the lyrics are really on another level. for one’s satisfaction, lies are being said and done, and sacrificing oneself to be the puppet to show that they truly love their partners. 
I’m so sick of this Fake love, fake love, fake love I’m so sorry but it’s Fake love, fake love, fake love
what gets to me is the extended chorus, that shows how far this kind of toxic relationship has gone and that it needs to end. 
the fact that the same lines are repeated twice show the added emphasis on this idea. 
Why you sad? I don’t know 난 몰라 웃어봐 사랑해 말해봐 나를 봐 나조차도 버린 나 너조차 이해할 수 없는 나
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Why you sad? I don’t know, I don’t know Smile, tell me you love me Look at me, I threw myself away Not even you can understand me
i love namjoon’s lyrics so much??? it shows how much he kinda become delusional for this toxic love etc. 
낯설다 하네 니가 좋아하던 나로 변한 내가 아니라 하네 예전에 니가 잘 알고 있던 내가 아니긴 뭐가 아냐 난 눈 멀었어 사랑은 뭐가 사랑 It’s all fake love
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You say I’m strange when I changed into the person you liked You say I’m not the person you used to know What do you mean? No, I’ve grown blind What do you mean this is love, it’s all fake love
moving onto to yoongi’s lyrics, this shows how much he changed to someone else; one that he thought his partner would like. this fake love is becoming more and more chaotic. 
Woo, I dunno, I dunno, I dunno why Woo 나도 날 나도 날 모르겠어 Woo, I just know, I just know, I just know why ’cause it’s all fake love, fake love, fake love
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Woo, I dunno, I dunno, I dunno why Woo, I don’t even know myself Woo, I just know, I just know, I just know why ’cause it’s all fake love, fake love, fake love
see, the lyrics of the bridge summarises back this whole fake love concept, not even knowing themselves anymore. 
but what i love is how bangtan ends the whole song with that same lyrics that they started it off with, it felt like they gave closure to the whole song. 
Reference: Colour Coded ©
aesthetics: this video is so full of aesthetics, i am so satisfied. 
like i mentioned before, there are some resemblances to BST, both the korean and japanese version. 
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but asides from that, theres very few palette colours they are going for; little monochrome, blue to green, bright pink and most importantly, that one specific place where everything filmed there is saturated. 
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several places being filmed, especially given how each member is focused individually in a room and only together when they are doing the choreography. 
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also, great lighting, because wow 
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also, the fact, no CG, so we have these great scenes 
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truly, another aesthetic video. 
choreography: okay, so i must say that this choreography wasnt as fast-paced as i would have expected it to be much like DNA or Dope, but it definitely had some more contemporary elements in terms of their formation though very subtle; more popping as seen through the choruses as well.
one could also say that this choreography also has some semblance with BST, in terms of their intro choreography and their setting.
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but moving on, love the use of the shadows right here, it’s so satisfying to watch, much like to say that within a person, there’s so many personas, all trying to come out etc; but regardless it’s only one person. 
then, jungkook comes along to get his solo dance, and that whole taekook pairing yet again. interesting to see taehyung the one to support jungkook here just like how taehyung supported hoseok in i need u. 
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then the extended chorus comes in, and as hoseok mentioned before in their comeback show on vapp, they incorporated the moves based on the ‘see no evil, hear no evil, do no evil’ kind of mantra with the 3 monkeys etc. and also, that whole popping thing that they did, hell yeah. 
and the way they transitioned it to seokjin’s part is so smooth.
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moving on, i must say i love how they just kinda focused on namjoon and jungkook for their parts; having another unit this time round; an unconventional one too i must say. 
and then when they moved on to hoseok’s part, the key point is the mirror dance, this was truly the highlight. ( and there seems to be no gif i could find for this help )
this part of the choreography to show that they are like dolls, it’s so befitting with the lyrics, and it’s such a quick transition, i love them. 
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also, the whole part where the rapline does their parts, mainly namjoon in his 2nd verse and then yoongi, in which they use it to kinda make a chill choreography since more emphasis is placed on their raps. 
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but of course, we have the iconic part of where jungkook show this abs and everyone combusts into flames. it’s part of the dance but damn.
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but regardless, the moves are amazing, even more so towards the 2nd chorus. 
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it’s so fluid, it’s great. 
but of course, the ending is the best. the formation, to actually just leave a hand out, kinda reminds me of a flower blooming, could it be emeralds - the flower that cant be blossomed? 
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last thoughts: i really love this title track of theirs, i feel as though it really shines the most in this album and really went for the message that they want to bring across which is fake love. 
[Photo Source] Bighit Entertainment  Credits: maxine ☕️ DO NOT REPOST ©
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putschki1969 · 8 years ago
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Translation of Kalafina’s appearance on the radio show 「Takeshi Washizaki’s YORU NIGHT×YORU NIGHT」
I thought I’d provide a rough summary [scratch that. This thing turned out longer than expected >_>] for yesterday’s radio appearance. This is dedicated to @sangaella who was kind enough to capture the whole thing. In case you haven’t seen the link she provided, go HERE (inactive)!! The interview can also be downloaded HERE on my google drive + the extra few minutes that were only available for subscribers of the channel (slightly better quality)!!
Disclaimer: Take this with a grain of salt. My Japanese listening comprehension SUCKS. T_T I tried my best though. And I might come back to this post and edit things later when I am not so tired >_<
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Translation starts behind the cut! Enjoy ^_^
They start with their usual introduction and then they are saying it’s been a long time since they have last been on the show. Washizaki-san is sorry that it took so long and he also apologises for the late hour. The girls say it’s all right because he is always super hyper and they are having loads of fun. They also mention that he likes to play on his guitar which is quite entertaining. He asks if Wakana wants to try and Wakana is all like, “yeah, sure, I wanna try”. He adds whether she would sing too, Wakana is up for it. Washizaki goes on to ask if they would sing in an izakaya (= Japanese pub) and Hikaru is all like, “nope, we don’t sing there” *in a monotone voice* Washizaki is thrown back by her cold reply and Keiko explains that Hikaru is now a grown-up, she doesn’t do stuff like that anymore.
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Then Hikaru goes on to bluntly ask Washizaki to sing some of Kalafina’s songs for them but they all end up agreeing that he would probably suck since he can hardly produce a three-vocal harmony . They start talking about their upcoming Live Tour and apparently some of the ticket sale for the Tokyo venue will be conducted by “Cultural Broadcasting = the channel they are on” [or something like that o.O] The girls are like, “YAY, that’s great!!!” Seems like they didn’t expect that, they are quite surprised.
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Washizaki explains the details regarding the Tokyo concerts at Tokyo International Forum and on how to get the tickets. The girls are laughing at how he is saying the number for the ticket application because he is doing it all seriously like he is some sort of voice actor or something. They love his voice though. And YAY, the application period is officially starting for their listeners! Everyone should be calling since it’s first come first serve. Next up they talk about their 「9+ONE」 tour in detail. How it is a “hall” tour and how they will perform in many different areas (read out by Keiko). Washizaki seems quite surprised by the last venue [probably because it would make sense to finish a tour in Tokyo] and asks Keiko to repeat it, it’s the concert hall in Fukuoka. Wakana explains they chose it as their final stop because that’s where she grew up, she wasn’t born there but she spent her childhood and youth there. Washizaki wants to know if that’s their first live in Fukuoka, “it surely isn’t, right?” Wakana replies, “no, it’s not our first time there”. Washizaki then wonders if Wakana’s childhood friends come to see her whenever she performs in her hometown and yup, they all come and cheer her on, every time. They are incredibly happy to see her perform. Keiko is imitating her friends’ reactions by being all like, “ahhhhaahha” and she says it’s great when the audience is this lively. Washizaki mentions the Coming of Age Day celebrations in Fukuoka, apparently they are a bit special there and it’s become quite popular (they are even in the news).I guess the outfits, hair and accessoires are a bit more flashy than usual or something. Washizaki wants to know what Wakana wore for her ceremony. Her ceremony and outfit were completely normal though, nothing out of the ordinary. Keiko is like, “That’s because Waka-chan is so innocent!” However, seems like people told her her hairpiece looked like seaweed. Awwww... Keiko thinks Wakana is too cute.
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Washizaki wants to know if Wakana was a “bad girl” in her student days. Wakana is quite shocked by the assumption, “Do I look like I had a bad image???!!” Washizaki has to admit that, no, she really doesn’t look like it. Wakana is trying her best gangster/yakuza imitation, “horahh, horahh!!” LOL But no, she was a totally normal student that liked to hang out with her friends. And they were all members of the art club. Washizaki asks the other two what kind of students they used to be. Hikaru took her studies very seriously and she was the type to be elected as class representative. But she didn’t stand out at all, she always wanted to be as inconspicuous as possible. As for Keiko, she always stuck to her older sister and she would do everything she did (which was mostly sports). She spent her student days playing soccer and tennis. Washizaki asks if Keiko was a class representative as well and Keiko replies in husky voice, “no, I wasn’t.” Washizaki is like, “oh, such a sexy voice!” Keiko says that at this time of the night her voice tends to become quite husky and she likes to talk in a lower voice to give her throat some rest (because they have been singing a lot). Washizaki keeps saying that it is quite sexy and I guess he starts to flirt a bit with Keiko (who is quite embarrassed).
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Wakana comes to the rescue and cock-blocks him, “Topic change, next topic!!!” => Next up is the meaning of their tour name, 「9+ONE」. They go on to explain that it is because this year is their 9th year and they wanna dedicate this year to work towards their 10th anniversary. They would like to create this tour together with all their fans, they wanna make it special. Washizaki talks about some ideas and how it would be great if they did some roller skating on stage. The girls are totally up for it and wanna try XD Keiko in particular
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Wakana thinks that she might not be able to, she will probably be super shaky. Then she goes on to explain what they mean by creating the tour together with the fans. Seems like they will include a lot of the wishes that fans wrote in their questionnaires (the ones that are always handed out during lives). They will also consider some other input like the wishes that are mentioned on their blog or in the emails they receive on their radio show. They collect everything. Washizaki goes on to say something about a “lounge voice” and Wakana mutters something but meh, no idea what’s that supposed to mean. Next topic is their Arena Live Bluray that was recently released. Hikaru says that they tried a lot of new things for that concert. Washizaki then asks if there is anything they notice when they watch super old recordings of themselves, if there is any change. Keiko jokingly replies, “Our faces were so round!!”
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Washizaki is like, “What? Round faces!!! Kalafina dango-siblings!!”  Keiko, “Yup, we were dumplings!!” Next up is a break where they are playing “blaze”. After their break we return to see Keiko leaning close to Wakana. Wakana is Kalafina’s official heater because she always radiates a lot of warmth and her temperature is always high. [Note that this part is NOT in the youtube video, they probably forgot about it] Another break where some girls read out some emails or something. Then we return to Kalafina and Washizaki playing the guitar.  
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They are having their own little party XD Washizaki then reads out an email by someone who attented Kalafina’s anniversary live at the Shibuya O-EAST and they mention something that Keiko wrote in her recent blog post. About live houses being amazing because you don’t just see the audience, you are literally locking eyes with each and every person. The person then continues to say that they also perform a lot in arenas and halls and whether or not live houses are very different to those venues. And yup, Wakana says that concerts at live houses are much more intimate, it’s almost like their situation right now, sitting in a booth across from each other. In halls on the other hand, their lives have a further reach. Wakana goes on with some weird train station metaphor, I don’t really understand it. The others seem to find it weird as well. Her point is though, that their hall lives can reach more people. Washizaki wants to know if live houses are more fun and Hikaru says that all venues have their perks but at the live house there’s always this awareness of each other. Everyone’s eyes can meet. Another question for them (from another mail). Is there any private challenge they wanna tackle?
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LOL at Wakana’s thinking face....For Keiko it’s trying out new kinds of training. Every year, she will change her work out and focus on different parts of her body. She will also get another trainer at the gym. It’s important for the body not to get used to the training. Washizaki wonders if there is any part of Keiko’s body left that still needs training. Washizaki then asks about oily food and Keiko outright shouts at him that she doesn’t eat oily food, “NAI/NO, I don’t!!!” She doesn’t like it. However, as we all know, she loves candy. I think Washizaki then asks about Keiko being chubby. Not sure if he asks if she used to be chubby or if she tends to be chubby or something else. Something along these lines. Anyways, she once again replies with, “NAI/NOPE” [her “nai” is so cute] Washizaki says something about her dango-past when her face was still round but Keiko clarifies that aside from her round face, she wasn’t particularly chubby. [I think... I am not too sure about this part, my listening comprehension sucks] Washizaki wants to know if they are active together and if they sometimes go for runs together. Both Keiko and Wakana reply with a clear, “NAI/NO!” Wakana’s body is just too weak for these kinds of activities and Hikaru is only active on stage XD Typical Kalafina style! Keiko =>”That’s Kalafina for you!!”
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Hikaru wants to watch more anime. DUH :P She talks about some anime called Yowamushi Pedal. She is very passionate about it and she has been very invested ever since she watched the first episode. Apparently it makes her cry a lot. As for Wakana, she wants to try diving. To avoid misunderstandings she clarifies, “...in the sea. The sea!!” Keiko is like, “Eh? I can’t imagine Wa-chan doing that!” Apparently Wakana has a lot of trouble with her ears when she is in the water, she can’t get her ears clear or something. She will have to work on that if she wants to go diving. She really wants to go. Why? Because she wants to see some sharks of course! She wants to swim with them. Her older brother lives in Australia and apparently there’s a place near his home where a lot of sharks and crocodiles come out regularly. Swimming is obviously not allowed in that area but still, Wakana wants to go there! She would like to continue talking but Keiko gently makes her aware that she has talked enough about sharks XD
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Keiko is like, “she always does this. She always strays from the topic and keeps on blabbering away.” Next question is whether or not they watch their own live footage. And yes, of course they do. Usually each of them will watch it immediately afterwards, on the day after the concert. They get special footage for that. Washizaki asks if they ever do live commentaries on their Blurays. The girls say no, they don’t and they are not even sure what that is supposed to be. Washizaki goes on to explain and they seem quite intrigued by this idea. The more they talk about it the more they are into it [PLEASE DO IT!] A last message to their listeners since their time is over. Mostly info about their upcoming live tour and their single.
Now we get to the extra part that was reserved for subscribers only. They are back!! BANZAI!! Party!!! High FIVE!!
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They talk about alcohol and how Wakana has recently started to drink white wine. Usually she is more into red wine (which she would drink with her meat and so on) but she thought she would try some white wine for a change. She is trying different kinds right now. Hikaru only drinks Japanese wine. Washizaki is having some wild ideas of Hikaru sitting in Japanese pubs and drinking sake. He is going on and on about being drunk and such and riding a bike. As for Keiko, she says she doesn’t really drink alcohol. During all of this Washizaki managed to fall under the desk. I guess he was laughing too much due to his crazy story about getting drunk. Keiko comments that at such a late hour, something like this probably can’t be helped. She then goes on to explain that she will sometimes have teeny tiny bits of sake with her meal but that’s about it. She can’t deal with too much alcohol. Washizaki wants to know how Wakana and Hikaru act like when they are drunk. Keiko says they are completely normal, they don’t act overly drunk and they don’t walk wobbly or anything. She believes it’s because they grew up in Fukuoka and Toyama respectively (they are hardened countryside people). Wakana is just more talkative and Hikaru doesn’t change at all. She has never thrown up or had diarrhea due to drinking (it’s funny how she sugarcoats this by using an euphemism :P she says “kirakira” and Washizaki is like, “what?” and then she has to explain what she meant). Anyways, she says that her behaviour doesn’t change at all when she is drunk. And she will usually only drink when she has eaten a lot. Wakana can drink a lot, she is quite strong in that regard, she is saying something about having bear blood o.O She got that from her mother. She can drink a whole bottle of wine all by herself. And she gets very cheerful when she is drunk. Washizaki says he usually drinks by himself and he doesn’t really go outside, he is a hikikomori. Keiko is like, “Ah, Hikaru is one as well!!”  Not sure what they are talking about next, it’s more about Washizaki so meh... For some reason, Wakana is posing and calling it a “narcissist-pose”
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Keiko and Hikaru are very amused. Suddenly Wakana and Washizaki start singing, no idea what they are singing but I am sure it’s just some reference I am not getting. Now Keiko and Hikaru seem to be embarrassed. Keiko says jokingly “Let’s go home NOW!” Wakana is having fun though. Another question by Washizaki. Do they ever harmonise in private? If I understand correctly, Keiko is talking about their wrap parties and other official events and how they used to have certain difficulties growing accustomed to that atmosphere. She thinks it’s easier for solo artists because they just go around and accept all the well-wishes and congratulations. But for some reason they never knew what to do, what to say, who should do or say something first etc....but ever since their 7th year, they seem to have become used to it or at least, they are trying really hard. [Not sure if I am understanding this whole part correctly o.O] Washizaki is like “YAY, great job for putting so much effort into it for the past two years!” They shortly talk about some other artists like Angela’s Atsuko. And then of course they also mention their live with LiSA. YAY two-man live with Ri-chan!  Everyone is waving at Ri-chan! Some talk about May’n as well. Washizaki hopes they will be all right at Lisani in the waiting area/lobby (due to their difficulties they mentioned previously). He offers some advice on how they should introduce themselves and such. And then it’s pretty much over...
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