#just to be fed in my delusion!

[mostlikelytofangirl]

Hi, since you are the person to go to for ruoyao matters I just wanted to say that while wrh seemed sad at the betrayal in the manhua, meng yao looked worried and sad too in the live action

OMG hi there anon!!

Ahaha idk if I deserve to be the ruoyao person around here, unless you count how insistent I am in pushing my agenda on y'all ^^;

But I'm so very surprised and thrilled to see ppl approaching me to talk about the ship and WRH with me, I firmly believe both deserve more attention given all the potential for fun exploration there is :D

Anyways, thank you for adding to the beatings my feels are taking today, I'm honestly having a blast TuT.

I'm not the most devoted to CQL's canon tbh, but you know what? I totally see it. Unlike donghua, CQL MY was definitely not looking triumphant or even relieved that it was all over. I understood his reaction initially as shock at what he had done --that he was even able to do it with how inhumanly powerful WRH was. But now that you have made this parallel... I think an argument can be made that MY was hit with the real possibility of having made a mistake

So if we incorporate this to the frankencanon I mostly work with, it would be pretty possible that MY made a last minute decision in a dire moment, but only after it was done he realized that maybe he didn't want it end like this, not after having experienced how it was like to be fully embraced in a sect that couldn't have cared less about his heritage.

Now he has to start over again for like, the third time in a place where not even his heritage is enough.

[anidealistatbestburntoutatworst]

fyodor: “what makes you so sad nikolai,, i think you’re the saddest soul i’ve ever met,,”

nikolai: “you’re the first person that’s ever said that- I’m usually told how happy i am”

fyodor: “well that’s because you make people feel happy,,”

[astarlightmonbebe]

i'm only at the beginning of li tongguang's descent into obsession (eps 17-18), but already it's both hurting and hitting. hurting, because we know li tongguang's capabilities, and his level headedness, and the potential he has, that he seems to throw out due to this obsession. hitting, because when you think about it, the obsession storyline and characterization does make perfect sense. obsession like that is a double edged blade, which can turn from love to hate, childish belief and joy to embittered rage in a second.

on one hand, it's painful to watch ltg's childlike desperation when faced with ruyi again. we want to grit our teeth and think of him as idiotic, unable to take a hint. but the reality is that it's a completely normal response to be expected from him. i mean, it's a dream come true, to see the person you 'love' the most in the world to be whole in front of you. it's probably what he could only dream about, especially being the one to apparently find her bones and bury them.

on a deeper level, ltg's initial reaction is very much a manifestation of his inner child, almost peter pan-like in the 'child that never became an adult/grew up' way. by that i mean to say the desperate urge to please, the constant worrying, and the oscillation between hot and cold moods are all so indicative of someone who grew up in an insecure/unstable environment, usually with volatile or simply unavailable authority figures. from what we can gather, he had no father, his mother wasn't in his life ("she doesn't want him around, nor can she bear for him to be away, so that's why he's like that" per empress zhaojie's words to ruyi). the one authority figure that entered his life to offer some semblance of guidance was ruyi, and even though it's clear that she held care for him, she was also a twenty year old assassin used to training subordinates, not children. her mentorship style is clearly so different when you hold ltg and yang ying side by side, and we know from ruyi's own mouth that she doesn't consider herself to have taught ltg well, and wants to remedy that through/with yang ying (i'll probably make a whole different post comparing this and the affects of this after watching some more episodes lol - there are bullet points in the drafts). so even though ruyi was his authority figure, she was still an emotionally unavailable one who couldn't meet ltg on the level he probably needed at that time in his life, and which no one probably ever did. hence his up and down reaction and actions.

it intrigues me, too, because i think, in a very subtle way, ltg is very much a character foil to ruyi in that he reflects some of her worst attributes, or more accurately represents the sort of person she was, or at least acted like (yuan lu's comment about how ltg has ruyi's gaze was meaningful outside of the jealousy arc - to me at least). i saw someone make a really interesting comment on how ltg's devotion to ruyi parallels ruyi's own devotion to empress zhaojie, which i'll also probably comment on more later.

obviously, ltg's obsession stems from an issue much larger than ruyi herself - she just happens to be the unfortunate target of it. and, clearly, i know his descent into it will be ugly, if understandable. i understand ruyi wanting to leave that part of her life behind, but also - to think that maybe many of the issues faced in future eps could have been avoidable if she'd been upfront with li tongguang about her identity early on.

[nikatyler]

Me: I'm only posting that to archive it on here, it's fine if people aren't here for that, I just want to have it here for myself

Also me: but why are people ignoring it 🥺

[tellthemhowihopetheyshouted]

suprize song guesses for london night 2*:

mary's song x fifteen x the best day

87 & 89; boy on the football team; works as a bridge between the other two

they all have themes of growing up, specifically going from the first verse of mary -> best day -> fifteen -> last verse of mary would kick ass imo

it would also be chronological in like, life events

country taylor

story of us x us.

both talking to the muse about how they feel after the end of a relationship

ngl i just want her to say "🎸🥀🪦the story of🪦🥀🎸 ... u-uUh-uh-us"

the albatross x peace

i can't explain how this makes sense but like

"she's the death you chose / you're in terrible danger" with "the rain is always gonna come / if you're standing with me"

how in the ancient mariner (poem where the albatross motif comes from) the rain happening both with the wedding guest and the mariner after he kills the albatross

honestly i think peace works with a lot of things on ttpd/the anthology

FOR EXAMPLE

peace x ttpd x the prophecy

goes from warning the person you're still with -> warning the person you recently separated from -> realizing you need the warning more than they do

"give you my wild / give you a child" -> "you took my ring off my middle finger and put it on the one / people put wedding rings on" -> "don't want money / just someone who / wants my company"

like, ill give you everything i have (but some things are out of my control) to you said could handle that to no one wants to be with me, i don't want to be with me, get me out of the life i built for myself

or it could be like, ill give you everything i have (but some things are out of my control) to you said you'd give me everything too, you said you were forever about this (add in the chorus of ttpd) but instead you left, and no one else knows you like i do, what are YOU going to do now to i should have taken my own advice, they were right to leave, who would want me if the trade off is this life?

tl;dr: i love my monochromatic greyscale albums

loml also fits the theme but idk if she would do 4 songs in a mashup and also the story feels pretty strong imo with just those three

london boy

she's in london

i have no further evidence

closure x imgonnagetyouback

so according to google these are in the same key and now i want to teach myself guitar so i can mash them up myself because dear god

anyway 1. she hasn't played either of them and they're both like top 3 of their albums

they also happen to be the 2 sides of my last breakup and i just now realized that...

anyway, in closure the other person is being clingy and wants the breakup to be amicable so they can feel like a good person

and in imgonnagetyouback the speaker is being ,,clingy,, or like, thinking too much about a relationship that's over

(also the person in closure always seemed to me to be in a better place emotionally + was the one to break up where as the letter sender felt like they had an ulterior motive for contacting their ex)

SO, imgonnagetyouback is written by the person who got dumped and closure is the person who broke things off and they're writing about the same relationship

peace x clean

i don't really have a story for this but

"the rain came pouring / down when i was drowning / that's when i could finally breathe" and "the rain is always gonna come / if you're standing with me"

maybe like, clean is the aftermath, written by person A, and peace is written by person B warning person A. the rain being like, person B's sadness/baggage, but also serving as the method of escape for person A

like, the thing that is person B's biggest flaw was the way person A knew to run

a real if they show you who they are believe them type story, but mostly i just like both of the rain lines in the songs

[cullenruthernerds]

a little look inspired by the antivan crows

[sweetronancer]

thinking about ronance while listening to taylor swift and i remembered that my wip called "crying" is probably based off of exile and also betty😭😭

[firsttraintovictoriaville]

I would like thank not only God and not only Jesus but Sarah-Jay Pierce herself for giving my delusional Miss Washington/Miss Colorado truther self more fuel within the first five seconds of the latest Miss USA Tiktok.

[kalims-pessimist-bestie]

knowing the personality types of all my friends and all the ikemen men is so fun cuz i can play routes that match them and i think “wow you’d be such a toxic partner”

[ssongsboo]

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR MAKING THE JUNSEOK FIC LONGER… no cus like literally NO ONE writes for atbo i’m gonna CRASH OUT😣😣💔💔

hehehe thanksi 💕 n i knowwwww ive complained on here sevERAL TIMES ALREADY that there are literally NO boats on here its tERRIBLE!!!!!

[asexualjedi]

Haha!!! Hahah!!!! This fucking blows. Hello teacher sorry I missed the extension date. It will be later haha. Haha. It’s like a roller coaster over here. Haha. Surprisingly can’t focus on school work when ur trying block out screaming with ur headphones.

[batsplat]

just read ur take on the big three rivalries/relationships and i wanted to know how much u know about djokovics and nadals history with the whole being friendly/sharing an manager/practising together until novak started dominating (the way rafa literally switched from calling him to nole to novak in 2011 specifically after the madrid incident lmao and novak deflecting when asked how their friendship was going at wimbledon that same year) i feel like those two have a lot of history and most people ignore it or just arent aware of it ig

they do have a lot of history! idt they were necessarily THAT friendly with each other pre 2011. nadal was always the wunderkind who djokovic (and murray) were chasing. you had classic young djokovic moments like saying that he was in control of his rg 2006 match with nadal until djokovic's back problems, that he realised he didn't have to do anything special to defeat nadal, that nadal's beatable (nadal won the first two sets 6-4 6-4 before djokovic retired). still one of the funniest things he's said fairs

but their relationship did clearly get worse in 2011, when djokovic had that phenomenal season and beat nadal all six times they faced each other (still a shame he lost his first match that year at the roland garros semis against federer, denying us the final with nadal everyone wanted to see). there's also obviously stuff like handshake compilations over the years lol

anyway, their relationship also seemingly took a turn for the worse in 2022 over the whole australia deportation drama. I should say that in their early years, big three rivalries were a little more exciting (well, maybe not federer/nadal, but the other two) - it's just that all three of them were increasingly committed to just being ultra respectful *cough* pr merchants *cough* and it limited how much they would even let themselves do anything interesting. nadal can be a bit of a prick who's a lot more amiable when he's winning and is generally more of a sore loser than djokovic, but what's the point if you've collectively taken a vow to not rock the boat? and djokovic, who became massively unpopular for absolutely no good reason, eventually responded to all the criticism and booing with this slightly desperate attempt to make himself loved - the boob throw celebration is obviously the most infamous example and thank god he dropped that a few years ago. which is compelling in itself, but unfortunately it's all considerably less compelling these days... whenever he's being a pantomime villain, it's now about The Establishment.... stuff like this wimbledon where he was being kinda delusional about what the fans were yelling, saying they were booing him when they were calling his opponent's name, which? I like that, I liked the interview, it was silly camp fun. and then it became discourse bloody piers morgan was speaking out on as some kind of grand statement about how djokovic wouldn't let himself be silenced any more. that's not fun!!

anyway, djokovic/nadal is still an all time great tennis rivalry, and I've enjoyed plenty of their matches over the years. just don't think they offered quite enough narrative tension to live up to *59 matches* and monopolising the sport + all the attention within it for like. a lot of years. idk they could've move more imo

[pprodsuga]

My heart feels like it’s about to burst out of my chest. One second.

Lately in my own life, I’ve been finding the beauty of ‘love’ in so many spaces I frequent for a multitude of reasons. This story’s theme overall is completely wholesome and I love that you took the third pov approach where we get to see just how Sunghoon loves from the perspective of his members.

His fangs and moles 😕😕 I love him very much and think his features are what make Sunghoon so uniquely him. Outstanding, really. Heeseung and the maknae’s witnesses of his love made me melt into my couch like why can I picture hee’s mouth on the floor and riki giving hoon an initial side eye like ??? ur letting that happen in public ???

I just think it’s always inspiring when two people being the better out in one another, not because they’re depending on each other, but because they’re a compliment.

Ah, so cute. And thank you for the dedication. :’)

✧ how he loves you

pairing: soft!sunghoon x reader (fluff)

summary: sunghoon never really believed in love until he was in it, and now that he was, it was everything.

a/n: thank you for 400 followers! this was inspired by something i wrote on my other blog for sakusa kiyoomi (don't ask)

love was powerful; it was strong and capable of change, and sunghoon learned that with you. he firmly believed that love could change someone. 

because it changed him. 

sunghoon never considered love, not really. he liked himself enough but he had never truly loved himself. his entire life, people had told him how talented he was and how handsome he was, but he never truly accepted any of the claims. 

despite his own turmoil, sunghoon loved you. god, he loved you. he loved you more than life; more than the tide loved the moon, more than the plants loved the sun. he loved you more than he ever thought possible. 

and you loved him. god, did you love him. you loved him so much that he had no choice but to love himself just as much. or at least, he tried to. 

he had always hated his fangs; his pointy canine teeth that always made his smile look abnormal. but when you poked them, smiling when they made an appearance, mumbling about how adorable and boyish he looked, sunghoon had no choice but to start loving them. 

he had hated his beauty marks; hated how they were scattered across his face in an organized manner. but when you first kissed them, telling him that “they’re beautiful, hoonie. just as you are” he no longer wanted to scratch them off. all he yearned for now was the days that you sat on his lap and pressed small kisses to the marks on his cheek and nose while playing with his fingers. 

sunghoon was absolutely, hopelessly, completely, passionately, insanely, and desperately in love with you. 

and anyone who had the chance to look at both of you together, would know. 

perhaps the most surprising day of his members’ lives was when they stumbled upon the soft moments between you and sunghoon and had the opportunity to see the way he truly loved you; feverishly and fondly. 

one evening, heeseung had come to practice half and hour early and when he stepped into the practice room, his eyes landed on you and sunghoon in the middle of the barely lit room. you spoke animatedly about something. he watched curiously as sunghoon gently twirled you in circles, smiling when you broke into giggles mid sentence. heeseung’s jaw fell to the floor when you began to twirl sunghoon, trying your best as you stood on your toes and he could only laugh. 

jay had witnessed sunghoon’s love for you when he found him in the dorm’s kitchen, trying to cook you a full course meal because you had a bad day. jay could only stand there with wide eyes as three videos played simultaneously, guiding sunghoon on a single recipe. he watched carefully as sunghoon danced around the kitchen, smiling when his friend added the wrong ingredients with confidence. 

jake had seen sunghoon’s love for you when sunghoon had come into practice with his hair braided, not a single care as the rest of the members stared at him. sunghoon was very possessive about his hair; it being one of the only things he liked best about himself. and to have you braid it–touch it–jake was amazed. even he couldn’t touch sunghoon’s hair without a slap to the hand. 

the younger members had witnessed sunghoon’s overwhelming love for you after a concert, when he jumped off stage and you ran to him, jumping into his arms. jungwon’s mouth was already agape at the sight of someone touching sunghoon in public. riki and sunoo’s eyes widened when sunghoon pressed a kiss to your lips. it was quick, but visible. he was just so happy, and he didn’t mind the audience.

sunghoon loved you in the most selfless way possible; by unconsciously loving himself. 

he loved you by coming to terms with himself, realizing that he had so much to offer when you were perfectly happy with who he was, with what he gave you. 

park sunghoon loved you with his whole heart, and then some. 

laying next to you now, sunghoon had never felt more loved. with your head resting in the crook of his neck and your hand on top of his heart as you pressed soft kisses to his jaw, sunghoon was absolutely sure that you loved him the way he loved you. 

your love had changed sunghoon, and in return, he loved you with everything he had. 

a/n: @pprodsuga for you <3

[phantomsies]

𝖓𝖊𝖝𝖙 𝖈𝖔𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖓𝖙 • 𝖆.𝖆𝖗𝖙𝖑𝖊𝖗𝖙

your biggest fan soon becomes your biggest obsession….

black onlyfans creator!reader (fem descriptions), nerdy!armin, public sex/public masturbation, squirting, mentions of toys, exhibitionism, throatfucking, cumshot

📝: I wanted to go a completely different direction with this but a) it’s no longer kinktober and it would’ve much better suited that and b) nerd!armin just scratches an itch in my brain I can’t quite put my finger on. So enjoy! 🫶🏾 (also, I AM SO SORRY THIS SHIT IS SO LONG 😭😭 I don’t intend on headcanons being this length but I can’t shut the fuck up.)

═✿══╡��˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿═══✿══╡°˖✧✿✧˖°╞══✿══

nerd!armin had been a dutiful subscriber of (y/n) (l/n)’s or as the world knew you, (performer name) for quite some time. He’d faithfully watched your content, never missing an upload to your sites and shamelessly scrolling your Twitter.

nerd!armin preferred your videos over others because they were so unique. Always willing to push the envelope by shooting in unconventional spaces; your car, public bathrooms and even dressing rooms..a polar opposite to his shy, bashful nature. In a way, he was jealous but also aroused..

from your long acrylics, fluffy lashes, colorful hair that changed from video to video and of course, the beautiful, dark brown complexion that radiated underneath the sun or ring lights, nerd!armin was obsessed.

nerd!armin would lie in bed after a long study session, classes or even a hard day at work..mindlessly stroking his cock in one hand as he held his phone in the other, eyes glued to the screen whilst you performed those lewd acts.

shoving those dildos in and out of your tight cunt, those pretty pink walls and plump brown lips sucking on that silicone toy..stretching yourself open all for his pleasure. A jeweled butt plug shoved into your ass and cream oozing down onto that gorgeous skin and the leather of your seats as you worked yourself into countless orgasms..mewling and begging for the would be viewer to keep fucking you..

“Fuck, I’m about to come, daddy..you’re gonna make me squirt.” Crying out as nerd!armin jerked himself even faster..subconsciously responding back without a single other person being in the room. ”Squirt for me, baby. Come..” Whimpering before exploding with a load of his own..

despite only being an intern, nerd!armin was well off from his freelancing tech work and although it didn’t leave him much room for socializing, he would tip you amicably on all the new content, as well as leave kind, respectful, encouraging words. It wasn’t something you saw often in this field.

it also didn’t take nerd!armin long to realize that you never featured a partner in any of your content like some girls eventually did. Only the various assortment of toys gifted to you by supporters. Which only further fed his delusions when you made a mess and glared into the camera, batting those doe brown eyes before saying “..look at what you made me do..that big dick feels so good..”

nerd!armin, who had only been with one woman sexually in his entire life and didn’t date often, could only dream of being with a girl like you.

so it came as no surprise when you announced that you would be opening a contest to film with one of your subscribers for the first time, nerd!armin leaped at the chance! The thought of getting to fuck the woman he’d hopelessly fawned over excited him.

nerd!armin nearly fainted when he got a DM on OnlyFans one day to see that he had won, asking when he’d like to arrange the meetup.

nerd!armin was understandably nervous on the day you two came face to face..but felt as ease when you continuously reassured him and even made sure that both of you had been tested, as well as protection.

“You’re so cute..it’s nice to finally meet you. Thank you for supporting me..” your gentle voice sent a shockwave of butterflies soaring through nerd!armin’s stomach as you wrapped him in a tight hug…and of course, a tightening in his pants upon laying eyes on his favorite creator. But that was merely the beginning.

nerd!armin found himself blushing when you slowly traced circles all over his skin, examining the single tattoo on his forearm and complimenting the smell of his cologne as the two of you sat alone in the bedroom of the designated filming space of your spacious home. Impressed by the bookshelves full of old literature he passed on the way in.

“Mmmm..you’re nervous, aren’t you?” “…I guess you could say that.” “Well don’t be, I’m going to make sure we have a good time, I promise..”

nerd!armin had no idea just how true you were to your word when less than ten minutes after the camera came on, you were on your knees, tongue extended and a wide smile on your face as he towered over you.

nerd!armin could hardly contain himself when eventually, those glossy brims were now encompassed around his cock. Slurping noises emanating around the room, along with his adorable cries…sloppy drool and gag spit spilling from that wet mouth and onto the pulsating head, shaft and those swollen balls. Disregarding the fact that your pretty face had become a disheveled mess.

“Oh my God…that feels so good, beautiful. Your mouth feels fucking amazing..” “You wanna come for me, baby?” “..yes! Drain me, please..” pathetically pleading whilst relentlessly fucking your throat.

nerd!armin unabashedly spent days, practicing his stroke on a translucent flesh light, feeding it deep thrusts and stuffing it with an ungodly amount of cum, examining your videos like study material..in hopes of gaining some stamina against you.

but nothing could prepare nerd!armin for the sheer sensation that being inside of you brought upon him.. however, he wasn’t the only one caught off guard..especially when he’d gently tug your head down and force you to watch as he glided into that narrow hole.. a move he’d learn from his tapes.

“It’s so big..damn..” “I told you..” giggling to yourselves as your gazes met and he’d begin to move.

nerd!armin almost felt compelled to believe that you were faking your moans like other pornstars so often did…but that misconception was cleared up when your eyes began to trail back, legs began to tremble and a slight bulge formed at the very bottom of your stomach.

“Yes, you stretching the fuck out of this pussy, baby..right there!..” “Am-am I doing a good job?” “You fucking me so good, please don’t stop.”

nerd!armin nearly lost all composure when you all but pushed him away, only to shower him in a stream of your juices. Only increasing as he tapped that swollen tip against your quivering folds.

nerd!armin didn’t last more than five minutes after that powerful climax and began dry heaving as his own neared. Ushering you back to your knees to paint those pretty features and tits with his load.

nerd!armin was convinced that once the cameras shut off, you’d put him out for nutting too quickly. Surely a woman of your caliber would never deal with that again. But yet again, he was proven wrong when you smiled up at him, flicking your tongue across your lips before posing a question. “So..where should we should film next time? We gotta do this more often..”

nerd!armin had found himself the newest and sole object of (creator’s name) affection!

[stargazingpsychotic]

My effort felt for nothing. The first person was difficult to talk to because I was being talked to by the others and grabby hands everywhere, the person felt like a machine and I got scared so hung up. Then, trying again, talked to someone who just didn't get my situation, or at least doesn't understand where I'm coming from and how serious it is to me. And so much for support with suicide, like I get I cannot kill my body, but I definitely was unlucky earlier when I failed in what I did, despite being so close to success.

[makarhughes]

i almost slid up on my high school crushes insta story and said something absolutely unhinged … we haven’t spoken in four years