#just to be clear i don't mean that my friends' parents are abusive or anything. i mean that they completely spoiled them lmao

[pietroleopoldo]

The problem with my life is that I am not the mom friend by choice it's just that my parents actually taught me how to be a functional human being

[jaysgirlx]

❝ 𝐈 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 ❞

❥ pairing: valentines jason todd x f!reader

❥ summary: this is your first valentine's day with jason after well he died and came back, he needs everything to be perfect for you to make for all the lost time.

❥ warnings: bit of angst, mentions of abuse/torture, tons of fluff & smut, unapproving dad Bruce Wayne

❥ wc: 4.3k

"Jason stop it, c'mon Bruce is going to catch us" you squealed, while your boyfriend pressed kisses all over your neck. "I don't want you to get banned from seeing me again, especially with Valentine's upcoming!"

Jason groaned and lifted his head up from your hickey-stained neck. "Even if Bruce does ban me, there's no way in hell I'm missing our first Valentine's," Jason says, laying his head on your chest. The two of you comfortably lay in your bed, cuddling while your parents were asleep a couple doors down.

You'd grown up with Jason, you'd always known him as a troublesome kid but that didn't stop you from developing a crush on the guy. You never thought of saying anything until you learned he'd gotten adopted after his dad kinda just disappeared.

For weeks you'd missed him, you missed how dumb antics, you missed the way he was always following you around and you missed his dumb smile. God, you loved that cheesy grin he always gave you..

Until one day he appeared on your doorstep, telling you that Bruce, his new dad was finally allowing him to visit his old friends. You thought he'd forgotten you but it was far from it and you knew then and there you definitely had a thing for Jason Todd.

It still took a while for either of you to confess your feelings. You thought you would crack first but Jason did instead when he learned that some guy from your school had a crush on you. He didn't mean for it to come out but he was just so jealous, "Why go out with him when you have me huh? I'd make a much better boyfriend. Just go out with me"

He wasn't wrong because he did, a week later you were on the best date of your life. Jason took you to this amazing amusement park that was happening in the middle of Gotham City. The whole night was spent on games and junk food, and Jason Todd got his kiss on the cheek that wasn't from Barbara.

Over time your relationship developed into something more, you couldn't help but spend more and more time with him. He eventually asked you to be his girlfriend and you've been his ever since.

"Well, I don't want to risk it okay? You need to get home before Bruce notices, don't you guys have patrol tonight"

"Okay fine, fine but first, I have something for you princess"

You watch as Jason pulls out what looks to be a ring box. "Woah, wash slow your roll buster, we are only 15 you can't freaking propose!" you whisper scream, praying that your shock wouldn't wake up your parents.

"Princess calm down, it's just a promise ring," Jason said rolling his eyes as if this was normal. "I wanted to give it to you before our date tomorrow, so you'll already be wearing it"

Jason sat up a bit and cleared his throat while he looked at you nervously, "I'm not sure if I've made this clear but…I love you y/n. Like really love you and you're the girl I want to spend the rest of my life with. So I got this promise ring, it's like a sign of me promising myself to you if that makes any sense"

"You love me?"

"Yes, I love you y/n and you don't have to say it back okay? We're young, I have years to come to hear you say it"

You were silent as he slipped the ring on your finger. You could tell from the moment he opened the box it wasn't cheap but you couldn't complain he bought it for you. Because he loved you. And you wanted to say it back but you were scared, scared to fully accept that you loved him.

Jason didn't care if you said it back or not because, in his eyes, you were the only one who accepted him. He looked at you sweetly and gave you a soft smile before getting out of your bed and heading towards your window. Now was the time to say it, to tell him you loved him but you just couldn't m

"I'll see you tomorrow okay sweetheart? I'll pick you up at 7" He says climbing out the window with one of his cheesy grins.

At the age of 15, you'd never be happier to be young and stupidly in love with Jason Todd. Ever since he moved in with Bruce, the two of you didn't get to see each other a lot, and that caused tension between him and Bruce. Jason believed he deserved a later curfew so he could visit you but Bruce was against it, he didn't think it was safe.

Tonight Jason snuck out to see you, the two of you had Valentine's Day plans and wanted to confirm them and we'll spend time with you. You were his world, you were one of the biggest reasons he became Robin. You were the one he wanted to protect no matter what and you knew that.

What you didn't know was this would be the last time you'd ever see Jason at least until you saw his casket. The two of you never celebrated your first Valentine's and you never got to tell Jason how much he meant to you. You never got to tell him how stupid he was for sneaking out, how much you didn't deserve this wrong, and that you did love him back.

7 years later

Everything had to be perfect.

Currently, it was February 14th and Jason had woken up with what was probably the worst news he could've gotten over a phone call.

Dear Mr.Todd, we're sorry to bother you on such a busy day but your reservation at Gotham Restaurant has been canceled due to a surge of higher-paying customers. We can reschedule your reservation for free at any time. We are sorry for this inconvenience.

"You're kidding me right!" Jason yelled, banging his fist against the wall. Out of a day, it had to snow today huh? Your first Valentine's since the two of you got back together. The first Valentine's since he died. Jason had never been able to give you the Valentines you deserved and when the two of you got back together, he immediately started planning.

"No Sir, we are very sorry for this inconvenience and we can try and get you another reservation elsewhere but-"

"Nowhere else is going to have any free spot and even ignoring that my girlfriend wants to go the Gotham Restaurant not anywhere else"

Well, that is what you had told him when he asked what restaurant would you like to go to that you hadn't been to yet. This wasn't how today was supposed to go. Jason had the whole day planned out. What should've been waking up in his followed by breakfast in bed, shopping, lunch, more shopping, dinner at your favorite place, a movie, dessert at your favorite ice cream shop, and ending with hopefully some cuddling if you didn't mind was now all ruined.

Jason had needed today to be perfect especially after you got over the fact that your dead boyfriend was not only alive but also vililangte who was formerly a crime lord. The fact you still wanted to be with him after all this time bewildered him this led him to believe he was probably on thin ice with you so today had to be perfect.

Since it was already Valentine's Day he knew no other restaurant would have any space for a reservation so that meant he'd probably have to cook the two of you dinner. Jason had quite the stocked fridge so he didn't see it as a bad idea but he knew you'd be disappointed for sure.

His entire relationship was riding on today being perfect and it was already failing. While Jason tried to get dressed he quickly noticed that it was already passed 8 o'clock. He was late, He said he'd make you breakfast in bed at 8 which made him late. Could today get any worse?

And it did when you told him you wouldn't eat breakfast with him because your boss really needed you at work for a couple of hours and he had already been on his way to your apartment. "I'll be back early enough for us to go shopping, and go to the restaurant. mkay? I guess we'll have to miss the movie" you said through the phone while simultaneously getting dressed for work. "Can't wait to go the Gotham Restaurant, can't believe you got us a reservation babe."

"Yeah about that…" Jason couldn't do this, he couldn't tell you that actually, you guys weren't getting dinner anywhere and that he was going to cook at home. You sounded so excited and so happy and he didn't want to be the reason that went away. "You'll love it alright. I'll pick you up from work around 6 for your shopping spree and then we'll get dinner"

"Jay I don't need to go shopping, dinner is enough really-"

"I want to take you shopping okay? I have enough saved up to spoil you and that's what I plan to do sweetheart"

Your heart hummed at the word sweetheart. It had been so long since Jason had called you that. It felt surreal because at times he didn't feel like Jason, well not like your Jason. The Jason who kissed you like his life depended on it, the Jason who was obsessed with holding your hand, the Jason who told you he loved you.

When Bruce called you and told you Jason was alive you didn't believe him. Jason was dead, you were at the funeral just like everyone else and knew how he died. A small part of you blame Bruce, this wouldn't have happened to Dick and even if it did he would've found him. Bruce tried telling you a couple more times but you ignored him. Your boyfriend, no your Jason was dead. The next time you hear about it was from Dick because Jason was out for blood. Joker's if we had to be specific.

You didn't want to believe him but Dick had loved Jason like they were biological brothers and you knew he wouldn't lie. He warned you that Jason was different and that I should be wary of him.

You took his advice and made sure not to walk home alone and tried not to go out at night but one day you had a rough day at work and you decided to visit Jason's grave. You left red dahlias on his tombstone and sat down next to it. You started talking to it about how your boss yelled at you and called you incompetent. "You would have called him an asshole for that if you were here," You told him how much you missed him. You knew he was alive but it felt so much easier talking to the tombstone because it felt like he was really there.

You did this consistently for about 2 months, you had caught on that someone was watching you. It was Dick because when you did actually see the figure they were much taller than Dick and they stayed hidden, Dick wouldn't have a reason to do that. It made sense to alert Dick but you didn't because you knew who it was and you weren't ready to face him.

Eventually, you heard from Dick that Jason had changed and that maybe you should talk to him but you still needed time. That didn't stop Jason from approaching you at your apartment. You were startled because your little high school boyfriend was suddenly 6 feet and over 200 pounds. He was practically all muscle and you were kinda scared. That didn't stop you from crying in his arms.

It took a while for the two of you to adjust to being in each other's lives especially when you never stopped having feelings for him. When you admitted that to him, he asked for a second chance. That he'd be yours even if you weren't his. So you let him be yours.

"Okayyy, I'll see you at 6 hun," you said just as you cut off the call.

Jason paces around his bedroom trying to figure out how the hell he was going to get the reservation back.

The two of you arrive at the mall, and you wait while Jason parks his motorcycle. It was shocking how there were barely any cars in the lot. Jason assumed that maybe people were just busy cause of Valentine's. You were so excited to go in that you ran over to the doors to get inside except you couldn't.

Closed for Construction, the sign read.

Jason didn't think today could get worse but it did. "No no no! This wasn't supposed to be Damn it!" He said angrily. He had even called the building, they were supposed to be opened. Construction wasn't for another 2 weeks, it was just his luck that they decided to start early. "Jason it's fine, I told you I don't need to go shopping. It was very thoughtful of you though to want to spoil me but you're already getting me dinner at the best restaurant in the city"

"There is no dinner! Our reservation got fucking and canceled and…Today is ruined y/n. Let me just take you home."

"Jason why didn't you tell me, I can promise you today is not ruined. Jay, are you even listening to me?"

Jason was hardly processing your words though because all he could think was losing you. You would dump him and he would go back to hating himself and his very existence. Would life go back to being a reminder that he died? He was tortured endlessly until he was finally out of his misery. No matter how hard the Joker tried to convince him that you hated him he wouldn't believe him. The part of you wearing his promise ring is what kept him going. What got him through the beating. What made it easier to look at the scars.

What left did he have if he wasn't able to love you. He was yours, he didn't know how to love others and he didn't want to because he would always love you. When he was watching you he realized that even though it had been 7 years you were still the same.

Still had the pretty smile and that contagious laugh, still had a knack for books and enjoyed it. You were still his, at least he believed so. And the one thing you asked him, he couldn't deliver. You messed up your first Valentine's and now he was going to mess up this one too.

"Jay for fucks sake, would you look at me!!"

Jason wasn't sure if it was that cursing that made him snap out of his spiral or maybe it was the fact that you were holding his hands. It had only been 2 weeks since he reintroduced himself into your life, and had been avoiding affection. He knew it was cause he was so big now and you were a bit scared. But right now you weren't. You were holding your hands with his. You were looking at him with what looked like pain and so much regret but you were smiling at him. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"Just shut up okay? And listen to what I have to say"

After you had finally managed to calm him down you knew you needed to tell d him how you had felt. "When I lost you, I regretted so much Jay but what I regretted most was not telling you that I loved you and it hurt. It hurt knowing Joker had you and that you were in pain but what hurt more was that you were really gone."

You paused and slowed your breath a bit.

"I know it seems like you owe me something like you need to make up for lost time or show me you're worth love but I already know that Jay. I've been yours since we were kids, m'kay? "

"But I do owe you, I owe you the goddamn world if possible"

"For what Jay?"

"Accepting me again I know I'm different than I'm used to be. I'm more shut out and I know I definitely look different. There is so much you accepted just cause I love you"

You groaned annoyingly and raised your hand up and shook it in his face, "Have you even noticed that I'm still wearing this promise ring? The one you gave me?"

Jason had, you wondered why you still wore it. It was so tiny and was probably uncomfortable. It was a tiny gold band, he had paid Selina for that had a diamond on it. To others, it clearly looked like it could be an engagement ring and you still wore it because you still, did being to someone whether was dead or alive. People tried to convince you to move on and take off the ring but you didn't listen.

"You still have it..."

"Mhmm, believe me now?"

"How about we get dinner to go at some random place, come to my place and we'll eat and cuddle while watching some movies"

"You're okay with just that?"

"I'm okay with anything as long as I'm doing it with you Jay, that's the whole point"

Jason smiled and held you in his arms, "can't believe you're still all mine"

"C'mon let's go to the movie theater and see what they've got"

And that's exactly what you did.

The two of you were cozied up on your bed, with a bunch of food. Jason bought himself chili dogs and got you pancakes to make up for breakfast. Who knew pancakes tasted better at night?

Jason also bought 2 tubs of Ice Cream to substitute as dessert. You may not be eating at that fancy restaurant but you were still having the time of your life.

"I swear you hated chili dogs when I was alive?!"

"I always liked them I just never wanted to admit it else that would've been the only food we'd ever eat"

While the TV played in the background you looked over at Jason who looked the happiest he'd been all day. There he was, your Jason. He was there, under all those scars he was still there. Jason noticed you were staring you looked over at you, and leaned in to place a soft kiss on your lips. "I've missed the taste of your lips" he whispered quietly

He kissed you again and this time you wrapped your arms around his neck, deepening the kiss. "I've missed you, Jay," you said in response. Jason didn't hands on his way to your hips and he pulled you closer, right onto his lap. You still hadn't adjusted to Jason being so big, so when your hands found your way to his muscles you were surprised to feel him groan while you felt him up a bit.

"Sweetheart, if you keep this up I'm going to do something you might regret"

"I didn't regret my first time with you, I'm not going to regret it now babe"

He groaned again this time grinding his hips upwards against yours. Jason swiftly switches your position, putting you underneath him. His kisses quickly became more eager while his hips rutted into you, "Baby, I don't have any-"

"Don't need it, got on the pill a couple years back" you said softly, gripping his shirt. "I promise I want this, so let's get these out for he was please?"

Your pleas were enough for Jason to take off your dress, you'd worn a red satin dress. He'd always liked you in red, especially when it was just for him. Jason had on a tux except he replaced the jacket with his favorite leather one. Regardless, he still looked so good, as he always did.

His leather jacket was already on your bedroom floor, you tried to undress him but he stopped you. "The scars…I don't want to scare you again"

"You won't, I promise. I'll even kiss them, they're a part of you Jay and you're mine" you say tugging on his shirt. With a sigh, he silently takes off his shirt. You raise your hand to touch him but stop and make sure it is okay. He doesn't verbally answer but he gives you a nod. You trace his scars with your finger but one sticks out the most, his neck scar.

You move your face closer to his neck, and kiss his scar, "You're still as beautiful as ever, you're still my Jason" you say while you pull away from his neck. Before you can even read his reaction, Jason kisses you again, rough and with more of a need. Jason had told you he'd met other people but in the end, he could ever think of you. You were the only person who made it just for him.

You'd had your own set of boyfriends which all seemed to end up the same, they'd get too close and you'd dump them. You couldn't imagine loving anybody the way you loved Jason. Jason's body pressed against yours with his hand on your back, pushing you into him. Your hands made your way to his pants, tugging at the waistband. "Patient baby, I'll take em off for you"

The sound of a belt hit your floor but you didn't care, you kept kissing him like your life depended on it. You didn't fully remember when Jason took off your underwear but you remember him, "Jay when did get so..."

"big?" he finished for you with a chuckle, "Yeah, there's a lot you're going to have to get used to with me" His tip pressed at your cunt, earning a disapproving groan for you. You didn't like how slow he was going, you knew he was doing it because he didn't want to hurt you but you weren't 15 anymore you could take it.

You wrap one leg around his waist pushing against his back. Jason liked the way you squirmed underneath him, practically begging for him to fuck you. After a couple minutes, he gave in and sunk his cock right into you. Your nails dug into his back, feeling the stretch of his cock inside you. You felt so embarrared you came on his cock from just him entering"

"Did you just-"

"Shut up please"

Jason looked down at you, his cheeks flushed red, while he was breathing very quickly

"Jay why aren't you moving"

"Can't baby"

"What do you mean you can't?"

"I mean if I move, I'm going to cum on the spot sweetheart so please bare with me" he groaned out, trying to adjust to your warm cunt hugging his cock. Slowly he began to move, using one hand to grip the sheets in hopes he wouldn't blow his load too quickly. His other hand was on his hip, trying to steady your body. Your hands were on his face, caressing his cheeks. Whenever he blushed it was so obvious, you used to tease him all about it even though you loved it.

He down to capture your lips again, allowing your arms to find themselves around his neck. Each thrust was messier than the last, getting rougher after each second. Sex now was so much more different than when the two of you were teens. Jason did things you didn't even know he could do. Once he'd found your g-stop he began to abuse it, earning a chocked moan from you every time. He was studying what you liked, what made you feel good and you loved him.

He let go of the sheets and placed both hands on your hips, giving you even tougher thrusts and even biting on your neck. Your entire body was on fire, you were overwhelmed notnonkynfrom his size but the feeling of Jason's body pressing into yours. You couldn't feel so good.

You always knew Jason was a bitter, also long as he didn't draw too much blood you were alright with it. A soft moan left your mouth as you came again, cum running down your thighs while Jason continued to fuck you. Jason thought about overstimming, making you beg for him to stop because you'd feel too good.

"Didn't know my girl was into biting" He said, while lifting up one of your legs to push deeper into you. You'd cum for tbr second time but he needed you cum one last time at least before he came. The rough slaps of skin and moans filled the room. Making it hard for you to not cum again on the spot. You felt so good you couldn't even complain that he was teasing you "Fuck you're really sensitive sweetheart"

You hid your face in the crook of his neck while his hips pounded into yours. Your legs shook while you whispered in his ear, "If you don't stop m'gonna cum again, Jay pleaseeeee"

He didn't stop though, instead, you came another two times. Makes a mess of cock. "Such a good girl f'me, just let me fill you up and we'll be done. I promise sweetheart" He gripped your hips tightly before releasing inside you. The two of you exchanged a couple more kisses while you both rode out your orgasms.

You whimpered while he pulled out of you, missing his warmth already. He watched as his cum poured out of you, dripping on the sheets. You laid back on the bed, while he hovered over you for a brief moment.

Once he laid down next to you and though he was panting he pulled your body onto his lap. You rested your head on his chest just as he used to do to you. That reminded you, there was something you needed to say, "Jay can I say something I've been holding in for a long time, yeah?"

"Mhmm, what is it, sweetheart?"

"Jason Peter Todd, I love you"

❥ a/n: happy valentine's to all my lovelies!! i hope everyone enjoys this fic and also has a nice valentines day, whether it's with someone or by themselves.

❥ taglist: @meowkn, @kazzattack, @woodenanemone, @yourlocalcringydaydreamer , @orchidsangel, @millyhelp

[fantazygirl-blog1]

So tired of everyone (or almost everyone) making Misa into a kind, weak little victim, manipulated by Light.

That woman may seem sweet, but she's absolutely ruthless. She's selfish, obsessive, stalkerish and emotionally abusive (perhaps not in the traditional way but I will explain)

Way before she even met Light, she managed to kill law enforcement (which might I add, she probably didn't even know was law enforcement) and news reporters just to prove a point. They were just a means to an end to her. She wanted to thank Kira for killing her parent's murderer, but she didn't even stop to think once if the people she killed had families of their own, children of their own. She only had one goal: what she herself, wanted. More than that, Misa literally offered to immediately off her friend, that helped her with the tapes (and if someone offers to help you with that, they're a very close friend for sure) and it wasn't even Light's suggestion. It was all Misa, who saw killing her friend as a way to get Light to trust her. It's clear that girl is willing to kill anyone and anything if it'll help her achieve her goals.

Also, she's super obsessive. My girl traded half her lifespan with no hesitation on the off chance that she might be able to meet Kira. (Yes, she had a plan but there was no guarantee that her plan would even work)And the instant she saw Light, she started stalking him (even though she herself had problems with stalkers) to the point that she just turned up at his house with no warning. Imagine if a stranger just shows up at your house like that, pretending to be a friend and your mom lets them in. That's fucking horrifying.

Also, Misa barely knew Light for like a few seconds and she decided that he was going to be her boyfriend, and NOTHING was going to stay in her way, not even Light himself. She pressured him into being in a relationship with her, even though it was clearly unwanted, Rem literally threatened to kill him if he refused, and then she had the gall to tell Light she would kill any girl she suspected would go out with Light if she saw her with him. This is where the emotional abuse comes from (even though I dunno if I should call it that but I don't know how else to classify it). Misa doesn't really consider Light a person. For her, Light is more like a doll she can project her feelings on. She attributed him emotions according to her whims and acted like those were the reality regardless of Light's real feelings. She made herself the main character in his story, even after told and shown repeatedly tha she wasn't and got mad when years later she was still neglected and barely paid attention to.

I'm not saying all this to hate on Misa and this in no way a Kira appreciation post (my favorite Light is Yotsuba arc Light, I hate Kira tbh) but I'm just saying, if you're a Misa fan you should be able to accept the reality: she's not a weak, sweet little girl, manipulated by evil Light. She's capable of all the horrible things she does all on her own thank you very much and I'm tired of reading fics where Misa is treated like only a victim and given leniency while Light is treated as the only true monster.

I'm just saying, the girl didn't need a boyfriend, she needed a therapist. Badly.

[amomentwiser]

"Why don't you spend time with us?" they say, "Keep your phone away at the table."

Parents say they want to talk — until it's about anything real.

They don't want to know about how their plans for your future make you feel.

They don't want to know your fears, hopes or dreams.

The things you're interested in — your favourite music, games and movies;

Or the things you've come to believe.

Sometimes it feels like parents don't want to get to know you as a person. They only see you in relation to themselves.

Or sometimes they do talk about music and games and movies, and it's even worse — because the conversations you want to have are serious.

And it's worse because it becomes very clear, that they don't want to have conversations that matter. That, god forbid, make them feel.

They want to avoid talking about all the times they yelled at you. No apology, no acknowledgement. Just glaze over those parts and pretend everything's normal. Neither guilt nor remorse.

And you're left wondering whether this thing you have a memory of actually happened, because everyone is acting like it didn't. And whether your anger is warranted, because everyone is acting like it isn't.

An unspoken decision: "Yes, we were harsh earlier, but we felt bad and are being nice now"

The implied demand: "...so be grateful,"

The undercurrent of a threat: "...or I'll get angry again."

And a push to move on: "Why do you bear grudges? Leave the past in the past."

All these little clues, that you learn to read in their body language and their eyes and their vibe.

And then they balk when you don't call them. Or jump at the chance to spend time with them — or even have a relationship.

It's weird, loving people you don't like. That you'd never choose of your own volition; that you'd never be friends had you met in the real world. People you're indebted to anyway, because they took care of you your whole life and changed your diapers and drove you to school, and what friend would ever do that?

Had they been overly abusive I would've cut them off without guilt; if I didn't know that despite it all, they really did love me, I wouldn't have cared about hurting their feelings.

Some people... you love them only because they are family. If they were a boyfriend, I would've broken up with them; if they were a spouse I would've divorced them. Alas, they are my parents, and I'm destined to love them. To give up a kidney for them if need be, but not any days out of my workweek.

I don't have these conversations with my family because I've come to realise that this is something they're not emotionally equipped to handle. Too much self-awareness would bring out memories not only of the mistakes they made with me, but also all the times adults in their childhood failed them; of all the ways they themselves were wronged; all the years they wasted because of choices they didn't know they had; and all the things they wish they'd done differently. So I understand; the flood of anger and regrets it brings to the surface must be draining.

But that also means that I'll distance myself from them, because for me, their misunderstood love is draining. And because this has to stop somewhere; someone has to start choosing differently — and I've decided it'll be me.

[jeankluv]

Birdie - Satoru Gojo | Chapter 13

words: 4,3k

summary: While everyone adored him, you stood apart in your feelings. It wouldn't be accurate to say you hated him, as “hate” was a strong word, rather, you harbored a profound dislike towards him. The problem was he knew that and his irritating presence seemed to persistently cling to you whenever he crossed your paths.

Now, you found yourself paired with him for your semester project, and the thought made you wish to hurl yourself out of the third-floor window. Three months of working alongside him loomed ahead. Adding to the discomfort, you were currently under the scrutiny of hundreds of eyes, each gaze feeling like a murder attempt. It seemed everyone coveted the opportunity to collaborate with Gojo Satoru, except for you.

ac: _3aem

tags: modern au, college au, fem!reader, academic rivals, he fell first, fluff, old money Gojo Satoru, abusive parents, slight slow burn, Satoru is a softy, secondary couple (Geto Suguru x oc), a bit of angst, no use of y/n, hurt/comfort, eventual smut, Gojo plays basketball, Gojo needs a hug

notes: I wrote down all the events that I want Birdie to have and the fic might end up being 35-40 chapters long. At first I really thought it was going to be just 20 but as I kept writing chapters, more ideas came and we still have a lot unresolved things, so definitely Birdie will take a bit longer. But thank you to everyone who always comments here or ao3, y’all really make me want to keep writing, but also those who leave likes they also help and make me really happy. Also we are over 400 followers what? 😭 thank you so much ❤️

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“In love?” You questioned still resting your head on her legs.

Kyoto nodded with a smile. “Yes. The way you talked about him, it’s not a simple crush, you realize that right?” She asked.

Did you? Your heart accelerated in your chest, what you felt for Satoru was not a crush or that you simply liked him, were you in love with him? You sat on the bed, feeling a little dizzy from the sudden movement. And you took a deep breath.

“I need to talk with him and apologize for my reaction.” You tried to grab your phone but Kyoko took it from you. 

“The fact that you’re in love with him, doesn’t mean what he did was right.” You nodded. “So don’t apologize for reacting the way you did, you were hurt and that’s okay. What you both need to do is talk things out and leave your boundaries cleare, that way things can work out.” 

“Oh god Kyoko.” You throw yourself at her. “I have never been in love or even in a serious relationship, this is scary.” 

She stroked your hair gently. “Don’t worry, I’m sure you will know what to do. But remember, don't apologize, you didn’t do anything wrong.” You slightly laughed. “And tell him, that if I find you once again crying I will kill him.” 

“My best protector.” You hugged her.

“You know I am.” She hugged you back. “You were there for me when I was at my lowest and I also want to be always with you and take care of you, because you are my best friend.” 

You felt your tears falling down your cheeks. There were not enough words to describe what Kyoko was to you and what it had meant to you that she came into your life. You have changed a lot since you met her and your world has also changed thanks to her. It really was one of the few good things you'd had for a long time, but now, that world of good things was slowly opening up and you just hoped it would keep opening up even more.

You felt your eyes closing little by little and how sleep subtly enveloped you, while you were still hugging Kyoko. 

That night you dreamed. You were able to immerse yourself in a clear world, so much so that you could feel it as real. In this landscape, you found yourself on the shores of a calm lake, whose surface shone under the soft caress of the sunlight. A familiar warmth hugged you, it was the comforting embrace of your mother's smile, a beacon of love and security, that you had long lost. And in the midst of this environment, your attention was focused on a figure kneeling near you, holding with tender care a wounded bird in their hands. The scene unfolded with such clarity and emotion that it seemed more than just a dream, as if it were a memory that your mind had wanted to eliminate from your head.

As the morning light filtered through the curtains, you woke up. Doubt lingered in your mind, questioning the difference between reality and a dream. Was it really a product of the dreams or a forgotten fragment of your mind? Although the images in the dream had felt real, you had not been able to see that other person's face clearly. But what was that feeling of anguish that had settled in your chest? Why did you feel so extremely agitated?

“You up?” You heard Kyoko’s sleepy voice talking, she was stretching herself next to you.

“Yeah…” You smiled softly at her. “Thanks.” You whispered.

“Don’t say it.” She sat next to you. “I’m always here for you.” She gave you a small squish in the hand.

You nodded. “And I’m always here for you too.”  You carefully rose from the comfort of your bed, feeling the stiffness in your muscles dissipate as you stretched your back. "I should start getting ready, I have class at 10." You commented.

Kyoko curled up under the covers and made a moan of reluctance. "Ugh, I just want to stay home all day." She wailed, burying her face in the pillows. “How about we skip class today?”

But you shook your head resolutely, dismissing the idea. "I have to go. I want to talk to Satoru, and if I don't show up, he might get the wrong idea. Communication is key if we want this relationship to work."

A soft smile appeared on Kyoko's lips as she looked at you in admiration. "I'm proud of you." She murmured, her voice filled with affection. “Let's go have breakfast.” With a sudden burst of energy, she jumped out of bed and took your hand, leading you into the kitchen to start the day with a shared meal.

While Kyoko busied herself preparing breakfast, you grabbed your cell phone and checked your latest notifications. There were no messages from Satoru and you understood that he was giving you the space and time you had requested. You felt grateful for his understanding.

Opening his chat, you took a look at the name you had assigned him and couldn't help but smile at how your relationship had taken a 180 degree turn in such a short time. You didn't want to lose what had just started by simply avoiding a small conversation that could clarify everything.

You to Satoru ✨

Can we talk before class today?

Placing your phone on the table, you welcomed the breakfast Kyoko had prepared for the both of you, feeling a mix of anticipation and nerves at the prospect of the impending conversation with Satoru.

Kyoko, noticing the thoughtful expression on your face, asked softly. "Is everything okay?"

You nodded, offering a small smile. "Yeah, I was just thinking about talking to Satoru before class."

"Oh I see." Kyoko's eyes shone with understanding. "I'm sure everything will be fine."

You nodded again, appreciating Kyoko's supportive words. With every bite of breakfast, you found yourself mentally preparing for the conversation that awaited you. The need for clarity and openness with Satoru felt more pressing than ever.

After finishing breakfast, you organized the dishes together with Kyoko. Turning your head you noticed how the screen of your phone lit up. You nervously picked it up and checked what it was.

Satoru ✨

Alright, if you want I can pick you up.

You bite your thumb, hesitant about what to do, but finally decided to follow what your heart told you.

You to Satoru ✨

Sure, I still need to get ready but see you in 40 minutes?

Satoru ✨

Sure see you

With your heart pinching in your chest you locked the phone and walked back to the room. You leaned against your door and sighed deeply, trying to calm your agitated heart. 

You wanted Satoru to get there as soon as possible, you wanted to see him and clarify everything. Your heart was shaking hard thinking about Kyoko's words. It wasn't a simple crush, you were fucking in love with Satoru Gojo and that overwhelmed you in too many ways. 

First of all, the idea terrified you, the stories you knew about love never had a happy ending. Your father abandoned your mother when she was pregnant after swearing eternal love, your grandmother was also abandoned by your grandfather after he found another family. 

You didn't want to have to suffer that abandonment yourself, you had already been alone too many times, you had lost too many people you loved. You didn't want Satoru to take your heart and somehow break it. 

But on the other hand, it was exciting and it filled your heart with complete warmth. And was able to put a smile on your face.

Feeling the weight of fatigue pressing down on your limbs, you backed away from the door and headed towards your closet. As you moved around the room, the warmth of Tokyo spring filtered through the windows. Jackets and long pants gradually were becoming unnecessary as the temperature was starting to rise. 

Looking at your reflection in the mirror, a thought crossed your mind, a memory of the time you wore Kyoko's dress and how Satoru had noticed despite your limited interactions. It was a small, seemingly insignificant moment, but it remained in your memory as a testament to Satoru's care. Smiling at the memory, you finished getting ready and waited for Satoru's call to light up your cell phone, now with a black screen.

Sitting on the edge of your bed, your heart raced with anticipation and nerves tightened in your chest. Time seemed to stretch on endlessly until the familiar melody of his phone's ringtone broke the silence, lighting up the room with Satoru's name displayed on the screen: "Satoru ✨.”

“Satoru…” You greeted, your voice betraying a hint of nerves.

"Birdie..." His normally calm and confident voice wavered slightly. "I'm outside. If you're not ready, I can..."

"No." You interrupted. "I am. I'll be there in ten seconds."

"Alright." He murmured softly, the tension was palpable even through the phone.

With a quick exhale, you ended the call and got out of bed, a rush of adrenaline spurring you to get moving. Grabbing your bag, you briefly said goodbye to Kyoko before stepping out into the sunlight. As you walked out the door, your eyes met Satoru's figure leaning casually against his sleek black car, his signature dark sunglasses hiding his gaze.

With each step towards Satoru, something tightened in your chest, making it difficult to swallow the saliva that was building up in your mouth. When he heard your footsteps, Satoru looked up, and at that moment, your eyes met his.

A surge of electricity seemed to run through your entire being as his piercing blue eyes, the ones you loved so much, met yours. It was as if time slowed down, the world around you fading into insignificance as you drowned in the intensity of that shared gaze.

In that fleeting moment, everything else faded away: the sounds of the bustling city, the warmth of the sun on your skin, leaving you alone with Satoru.

When his eyes held yours, you felt a sense of calm wash over you, as if his gaze alone had the power to anchor you in the tumultuous sea of ​​emotions swirling inside you.

“Hey.” He greeted you softly.

“Hi…” You tried to greet him in the same softly way, but somehow your voice came out shaky.

For a moment, silence enveloped them both, interrupted only by the sound of the city of Tokyo getting into motion that spring morning.

Breaking the silence, Satoru pointed towards his car with a subtle nod. "We should …?"

Nodding, you got into the familiar car. As I sat in the car next to him, the engine whirred to life. You pressed your hands against your knees and let out the air accumulated in your lungs.

“Satoru…” You began but your voice was left hanging in the air when Satoru talked.

“I’m sorry…” He began, you saw how he held the wheel stronger than before. “I’m really sorry and I don’t know how to begin this. And I don’t want to make excuses because what I did was unacceptable, I crossed some boundaries that I shouldn’t have crossed and all because I thought I was doing it to help you but the truth is that I only hurt you and invaded your personal space.” He took a small break. “I would understand if you don’t want to talk or even see me again, I’m an asshole and I fucked up badly.”

The car fell silent, his eyes were fixed on the road and yours on his face. “Can you pull over?” You said.

Satoru simply nodded and in silence he pulled over, parking the car in a free space. His eyes were still looking to the front, not looking at you.

“Satoru… could you look at me.” And with puppy eyes he looked at you. “Yeah, what you did wasn’t okay and it hurt me. And I’m glad you know it was wrong and hopefully you don’t make that mistake again.” Satoru nodded in silence. “But…” You paused and looked at him, carefully and feeling the nervousness and shyness take over your body, you held his face. “I don’t want to lose this, I don't want to lose us.” You shyly smiled. “I’m glad you acknowledge what you did wrong but I don’t want this to break up.” His eyes were fixed on you, carefully watching you.

“Are you sure?” He swallowed. “It’s okay if you don’t want to see me again, I can… bare with it.” You smiled seeing his poor intent of lying.

“Could you?” You smiled.

And he shook his head. “I wouldn’t.” He got closer to you and rested his forehead on your shoulder. “Thank you…” He whispered. “I know I’m an asswhole and that I’m annoying and all that.”

“You are my all that.” You smiled, caressing his white hair. 

“Let’s skip classes.” He said against your skin. “Let’s go to 

“Can I kiss you?” He said looking at your lips and then up at your eyes. 

“Yes…” You whispered before feeling the warmth of his lips on yours.

The kiss was a tender hug, soft and delicate, as if Satoru was afraid of breaking you or hurting you. His lips meeting yours with a soft caress, transmitting a silent promise of protection and tenderness. Yet despite the gentle touch, you felt a surge of warmth radiate from within you, filling you with a feeling of fullness you had never known before.

In that moment, you found yourself craving more of his touch, hungry for the warmth of his lips against yours. His hesitation only fueled your desire, igniting a fire within you.

As the kiss deepened, you surrendered to the sensation, losing yourself in the tender embrace of his lips. Every brush of skin against skin sent a jolt of electricity coursing through your veins, igniting a passion that burned hotter with each passing moment.

You felt alive, consumed by the intoxicating allure of his presence. It was a moment of pure happiness, where time seemed to stop and the world faded away, where it was just the two of you.

You felt an avalanche of emotions cascading through you, a mix of desire, and vulnerability.

When the kiss finally broke, a breathless moment remained between you, your labored breaths mixing together to form one. Satoru's gaze, now softened but full of intensity, reflected the whirlwind of emotions swirling within you.

With a calming breath, your voice was a mere whisper against the growing sound of your racing heart. "Satoru..."

He met your gaze intently, his eyes searching yours for the words that threatened to leave your lips.

"I want to meet you." You confessed, your voice shaking slightly with vulnerability. "Everything about you."

A slight smile appeared at the corners of Satoru's lips. "And I want to show you." He responded, raising his hand to gently caress your face.

Under his soft touch you closed your eyes and let yourself be caressed, you let yourself be loved for the first time in a long time. He left a small kiss on your lips before turning back to the wheel.

“Let’s go to the beach the day after tomorrow.” Satoru smiled at you and you smiled back at him. 

“Why then?” You wondered looking at him.

“Oh I heard the weather will be good then.” He shrugged his shoulders.

“Okay…” You smiled. “It’s a date then?” 

“Yeah…” He softly whispered. “Thank you birdie.” 

You shook your head and your shoulders. “You need to stop thanking me Satoru. Now let’s go to class.” 

Satoru nodded and started the car. With a smile on your lips, you felt your heart beating steadily again, and the cloud that had been lingering in your head disappeared completely. The road became familiar, and soon Satoru parked the car in front of your college.

You hesitated for a second as you got out of the car and walked next to him, but Satoru grabbed your hand with a reassuring smile. You felt everyone's eyes on you and heard the whispers as they commented on the scene unfolding before them. Satoru walked proudly, holding your hand, and didn't let go until you reached your class. That day you weren’t sharing any classes so that was your goodbye spot.

As you approached the classroom door, he gave your hand a gentle squeeze. "I'll see you after class, okay?"

You nodded, feeling a surge of confidence from his support. "Okay."

He leaned in, giving you a quick kiss on the cheek. "Good luck in class, birdie."

You watched as he walked away. Turning to enter the classroom, you noticed a few lingering glances and whispers from your classmates, but the warmth of Satoru's presence lingered with you, making it easier to ignore them.

Taking your seat, you focused on the lecture. As you left your first class, you were greeted by the smiling face of Kyoko, who was waiting for you leaning against one of the walls outside your classroom. With a grin, she approached you.

"And well? Have you already spoken?" She asked eagerly, falling into step beside you. "C'mon, tell me!"

You nodded, a smile playing on your lips as you recounted the recent events. "We fixed everything, and in two days, we're going to the beach.” You announced, unable to contain your excitement. "As a date."

Kyoko's eyes widened in excitement, and she let out a delighted squeal, clapping her hands together enthusiastically. "Oh my gosh, that's amazing!" She exclaimed, unable to contain her joy. "I'm so happy for you!"

You couldn't help but laugh at her reaction, feeling grateful to have such a supportive friend by your side. Kyoko kept on jumping around winning the curious eyes of everyone surrounding both of you.

“You know what it means right?” She smirked.

“What?” You said with a funny tone on your voice.

“Double dates!” She made a small dance. “Oh what could we do? We could go to Kyoto or Okinawa during the summer break!” 

“A girl works you know?” 

“And that girl deserves some vacations you know?” She replied back. “C’mon imagine expending some days in Okinawa, the four of us, on the beach.” She started daydreaming and you rolled your eyes. “I’m sure you want to see your man shirtless and more.” 

“Geez Kyoko.” You rolled your eyes. 

She laughed and followed your steps. “Sorry, sorry but you know?” You looked at her. “Suguru has his whole arm tattooed, ugh when I tell you that is so sexy, when he is without...” 

“Please Kyoko, I don't want any more information about your private relationship with Suguru.” 

“Okay, I will stop.” She laughed. “But hey!” You looked at her from over your shoulder. “I’m so happy for you.”

“And I’m happy for you.” You smiled back at her. 

“Can’t believe we used to think they were dating.” Kyoko recalled the time when you both thought Satoru and Suguru were dating and you chuckled at it.

Satoru Gojo POV

“Did you fix it?” Shoko raised her eyebrow.

“I did, we are good okay?” He sighed. “I won’t fuck things up like that again.”

“Well done man.” Suguru raised his thumb nodding his head. “So what now?” He raised his eyebrows while taking a sip of his tea.

“We are going on a date in two days.” Satoru smiled with confidence.

“Are you planning on asking her to be your girlfriend?” Shoko questioned.

“I… I guess so.” He shrugged.

Shoko looked at Satoru and then at Suguru. “What’s up with him?” 

Suguru shook his head with a smile. “He has never done that before.” 

“What?” Shoko gasped surprised. “But I have seen you dating before.” 

“Yeah, but it was different. We hung around, had fun and I guess we assumed we were in a relationship.” Satoru moved his hands around, trying to explain himself. “But I never sat down and asked anyone to date.” 

“And you are nervous.” Shoko mischievously smiled. “Oh my god!” She laughed. “The great Satoru Gojo is nervous.” 

“Shoko shut up.” He said embarrassed. 

“No, no, I really like this.” She laughed. “Oh god I’m so happy to see this side of you.” 

“Shoko enough.” Suguru laughed. 

“Suguru admit it, you are also loving it.” She smirked.

“Don’t Suguru.” He warned him. 

“I have to say it, I like seeing this side of you.” Suguru laughed alongside his friend.

“You know, I hate both of you.” Satoru stood up. “You.” He pointed at Suguru. “We have practice so get your ass up if you don’t want to get scolded.”

Suguru chuckled and stood up. “See you Shoko.”

“See ya!” Shoko waved her hand at her two friends.

Satoru and Suguru walked side by side. With their training backpacks slung over their shoulders, Satoru and Suguru took giant steps towards the basketball court. The familiar, slightly musty smell of the gym greeted them as they entered, a nostalgic reminder of the countless hours they spent training there. The freshmen were already working hard, performing exercises as Coach Yaga's booming voice echoed through the space, urging them to try harder.

Satoru and Suguru exchanged amused glances, their eyes reflecting shared memories of their own experiences as freshmen. They remembered well the intense sessions and the coach's unwavering expectations. 

"It seems like yesterday we were the ones who were yelled at." Satoru reflected, with a smile on his lips.

"Yeah." Suguru agreed, chuckling. “Coach Yaga hasn’t changed in the slightest. He's still as intense as ever."

As they walked towards the court, Yuji greeted them, putting aside his training, earning a shout from the coach. 

Coach Yaga turned his head and saw them. "Gojo, Geto, stop standing there and get to work! Warm up with the others!"

Satoru waved playfully, earning a quizzical look from the trainer, and joined the exercises with Suguru at his side.

“Captain Gojo!” A voice resounded in the distance.

Satoru looked up to see Haibara's figure running towards him, followed closely by Nanami. Upon reaching them, Haibara knelt before Satoru, his expression serious and apologetic.

"I'm so sorry if by not keeping my mouth shut I've ruined your relationship, Captain Gojo!" Haibara blurred, his voice filled with remorse.

Satoru looked embarrassed to the side of him, looking at Suguru, who was trying to suppress a laugh. "Haibara, please get up." Satoru said, his tone soft but firm.

Haibara did as Satoru asked, slowly getting up but still looking worried. 

"Nothing has happened." He tried to calm him down, Satoru. "And in any case, it would be my fault if the relationship had gone sour. Birdie and I worked it out." I gave Haibara a reassuring pat on the shoulder. “The truth is, you did well Haibara. I'm sorry for putting you in that situation.” This time it was Satoru who bowed slightly.

Haibara smiled at Satoru. “It’s okay captain, I’m glad you two fixed everything.” 

“So you and the girl you were with the other day at the club are finally dating?” Yuji exclaimed. “Oh she was really nice and funny.” 

Satoru caught a bit trying to keep himself calm. “Not yet.” Satoru murmured.

“Oh but they were really nicely kissing and holding hands after getting out of the car.” A voice spoke. 

Satoru rolled his eyes upon recognizing the voice and looked at him indifferently. “Sukuna, why do you care about what I do?” 

Sukuna laughed as he approached the group. “Excuse me Gojo, it's hard not to see you.” 

Satoru sighed and rested his hand on his hip. "What are you doing here? "It's been more than a year since he expelled you from the club." 

“Can't I come see my favorite nephew?” He tilted his head, directing his gaze to Yuji.

Yuji rolled his eyes. “I didn’t want to see you here.” 

“Neither did I want to come here brat, but your father called me and told me to hang you this.” He said throwing him a bag. “Anyways Gojo is good to see you.” He smirked leaving the group.

“Sometimes I wonder how you two are family.” Yuta mumbled. 

“Don’t remind me.” Yuji protested. “He is my uncle but we are so close in age that sometimes he is like an annoying older brother.”

"Yuji, do you know if Sukuna has played on any team again?" Satoru asked, still staring at the door where he had left. 

Yuji shook his shoulders. “I think so, but I'm not sure. He never tells me anything.” 

“Captain, are you worried that Sukuna has been signed to another team?” Megumi asked. 

“A little, little he cared about the sanction they gave him last year when he broke Kamo’s fingers from Kyoto college.” Satoru sighed and looked at Suguru. “I'm afraid he won't care again and this time he'll do something to one of the team.” 

“He probably still has a lot of resentment from last year.” Suguru remembered this time and Satoru nodded heavily.

“Well…” Satoru stretched himself. “We will handle it once it comes, right?” He smiled. “Besides, we are the best. There is nothing to worry about.” 

Suguru chuckled and shook his head. "You're right. Now let's train guys." He said he and everyone got moving. 

But Satoru stayed in his place still feeling a little anguish in his stomach. Shaking his head, he walked onto the basketball court and began training with the rest of his teammates.

Final notes: Birdie and Satoru fixing everything, bc communication is the key. It always frustrates me when I read in a book or a series how things get complicated between the characters due to lack of communication, that's why I didn't want to prolong the small conflict between them and have them fix things like adults, talking.

— comment if you want to be tagged

🏷️: @lavender-hvze , @crybabytoru , @sanriosatoru , @norvacaine , @sadmonke , @faetoraa , @hexipessimistic , @gojoful , @kitzusune , @sh0jun , @manyno , @ropickle , @lolsasuke , @milk3evee , crunchypotatoooooooooo , @catobsessedlady , @zoeyflower , @starlostwish , @tinydonkeysforlife , @mimisq11341 , @n1vi

[beanghostprincess]

I wanna know who your favorite vinsmoke sibling is so bad actually please tell me 👀✨

My friend and my brother laughed at me when I told them my favorite Vinsmoke is Niji, and I genuinely was embarrassed that day because I didn't really know much about him at the time (I think I had only watched a few eps of WCI) and it's pretty clear in the show that he's, uh, the worst of the Vinsmokes. And by "the worst" I mean: The one who's portrayed as the worst because he's the most active one when it comes to abuse and supremacism within the family line. Unlike Ichiji (who's more serious) and Yonji (who's more playful, somehow) Niji is the one who has to actually fight for a role in his family and that's why I think he's so fucking annoying all the damn time. I hate him. I love him. I want to hug him. But also I wouldn't mind punching him very, very hard. I have mixed feelings, but yeah, Niji is my favorite Vinsmoke. And you haven't asked why, but I feel the need to do some sort of mini argument about this because I am a very resentful person and I want to show my friend and my brother that Niji is actually a very interesting character!! And my fiancé thinks I just like him because he's hot, and she's right but only like a 20%. Maybe 40%.

I will try to put my thoughts into words, but it's pretty difficult because I have a lot of things to say about this blue evil gremlin.

I like Niji the most because I think he is, between the three brothers, the one who shows feelings and ambitions outside their emotionless selves the most. I know they technically are the same, but I don't think so (btw, please assume I'm not including Reiju in this text because she's canonically different from them and I'm just referring to the brothers).

As I mentioned before, I think Niji is the one brother who is the most annoying and evil because he feels the need to stand out. Ichiji is serious, and calculative and has a secure place in the family. He is the number one, even if Reiju is the oldest (I would like to talk more about how Reiju, being a woman, even if she's the oldest, she's the number 0. Because she is the oldest but she's a woman, so she obviously doesn't and would not be able to wear the number 1 like a man would. She is the oldest and yet, she has less significance in the family line than Ichiji. But, yeah, this is something that has nothing to do with Niji, sorry). Ichiji, like all of his siblings, wants recognition from his father, but he doesn't have to try as hard as the others to be impressive because he is, after all, the oldest. The typical "older sibling in an abusive household who has to deal with all the bullshit to protect their siblings"? That's something Reiju took over. That's Reiju's responsibility as the oldest and the woman. Ichiji literally doesn't have to do anything besides leading the team and being the evil, emotionless machine his father created. That does not mean that I don't think he could be able to develop more feelings, because I think he could and I love the concept of him being the first one to protest against Judge's behavior, but you get me. When you're the oldest brother with an even older sister, your responsibilities are pretty limited. So he doesn't have to be anything but there and himself.

Yonji, on the other hand... He is the youngest. Even younger than Sanji. He doesn't have to try, because Niji and Sanji should be the ones to do so. Little siblings are not expected to do much besides existing because irl parents are usually tired of raising children and they end up either getting neglected or seen as decoration. As a little sibling myself I can confirm that these things affect really badly to your brain growing up, but I got a more Sanji treatment so I can't speak for Yonji here. The thing I can say, though, is that in comparison to Niji, Yonji is just there. He's silly and goofy. He's funny. He's dumb. He has the excuse of being the little one to act that way. Getting lost eating or doing whatever. Even the fact that his powers are more physically focused instead of power/intelligence centered shows that he can just punch away his issues. He's the gym bro of the siblings. Don't expect much from him. <- Thing that's often said about little siblings, btw, and affects real fucking badly in early teenage years. The fact that he's portrayed like that is so on point tbh but after all, they don't have high expectations for him, so little to no effort is everything he does.

Then there's Niji, of course. My favorite. Love him. Hate him. Whatever. Niji is the middle child. And God, do I have to say things about middle siblings.

The thing about Niji is that he actually has to try and make a name for himself in the family because otherwise he'll probably get forgotten. I often wonder if he had that fear of becoming the next Sanji once he "died" (he's the only one genuinely asking if Sanji died on them before Yonji and Ichiji say they don't care) because his role is not as noticeable as the others. Reiju is the woman, Ichiji is the successor, Sanji is the weakling getting bullied (being technically one of the little siblings but still being in a limbo of middle/youngest because the little one is Yonji), and Yonji is the little one. Then... What's Niji?

Niji needs Sanji way more than he's willing to admit, and I love that. I absolutely love how he's written because he constantly shows that he needs Sanji, through both words and actions. He needs him because without Sanji's existence -without Niji being his bully- Niji is nothing but number 2. And there's nothing more frustrating than being the number two when it comes to family hierarchy. Not going to mention every little thing he does, but as I said, I love how well-written he is. He's the sibling Oda uses the most to show the abuse Sanji went through, but that's only because Niji is the only one who needs to do that. Niji is the one to talk to Sanji first, all the damn time. He gets angry when Sanji doesn't respond. He gets angry because Sanji can't be bullied anymore. He gets angry out of fear, in my opinion, because if the weakling can't get abused anymore, then he's not worth anything. If Sanji isn't the third, the second one is left alone. 2 can't fight 1 because 1 has the protection of starting the line. And 2 can't fight 4 because there's a missing link that keeps 2 from 4. So Niji is mad at Sanji because Sanji isn't the same weak crybaby he used to be, and he can't use him anymore to be secure and safe.

That's fucking horrifying when it comes to family hierarchy.

I like Niji because, despite being an asshole, he has reasons to be like that. First of all, because his father literally made him this way. But also, the little feelings he has (selfish emotions, yes, evil. But they're feelings, anyway. Urges. He's supposed to be emotionless and yet he knows how Sanji feels enough to use that to his advantage) are used as a way to feel superior and safe because he feels inferior. I think he's the one showing more emotions out of the three, even if those emotions aren't healthy or good and it's just him being angry all the time. That means that if he has urges and needs like that, even if he doesn't fear his own death, he could end up developing more and more empathy. His type of empathy comes from a place of fear. He feels what Sanji feels. And it's not that he doesn't care (I mean, I am aware that he technically doesn't, but let me dream) but it's just convenient for him not to care and keep bullying him to secure his place in the family.

Also pointing out that I like Niji because, being the one who says he hates Sanji the most, he's the one to protect him with his own body when that scene of the siblings helping Sanji escape happens. The others only clear the way, Niji stays with him. There's a really cool post about this on Niji's tag somewhere!!! I personally think he does this because, as that post said: Niji keeps seeing Sanji as weak, instead of believing in him enough to just clear the way. He protects him because he thinks he can't protect himself. Because he's weak.

And yes, it might sound offensive and emotionless and it doesn't make Niji a better person. But it makes him an older brother. Believing in Sanji would be great, but thinking that he's weak and needs protection after years of projecting on him only shows that the weak one is Niji. That he wants and is willing to protect his brother, too. If he didn't care about his well-being he would've just cleared the way for him, not caring about what could've happened to Sanji. But he goes all the way to help him out and protect him longer than the others did. Idk. I find that a very beautiful way of ending their relationship.

All of this being said, I have to be honest with you: When I said I liked Niji for the first time I only did it because people around me kept saying he was the worst one and it bothered me because I found his design pretty fucking cool. And tbh when he started being an actual character? I loved him even more. Because during WCI he's a fucking asshole but the way he acts towards Sanji is wanting to get a response from him, and I just find that so curious and complex... Like, if he just wanted to be evil he'd be more the Doflamingo type. But Niji looks for a response in Sanji's eyes. He wants to feel powerful because he knows he isn't.

And also, well, he's very cute and I like his hair a lot and he makes me furious sometimes which is great because if a character doesn't make you want to punch him at one point, is he really a good character? Look at him! He deserves to get slapped in the face. But also, I would love to kiss him afterward. What's that Olivia Rodrigo lyric? Ah, yes: "I wanna break his heart, then be the one to stitch it up. Wanna kiss his face with an uppercut." That's how I feel about him.

I really hope it's obvious, with all of this, that "Succession" is one of my favorite TV Shows, because I could go on and on and on (and nobody would listen but idc) about how the Vinsmokes are just the Roy family. Both One Piece and Succession deal with family in which hierarchy is crucial in a very specific and accurate way. It makes me sick. I love it.

Anyway, have some pics of my blue idiot:

I want to hit him in the head with a baseball bat.

[cursedvibes]

comparing geto and maki's massacres as the same is crazy to me. geto slaughtered an entire village of defenseless people and justified it as protecting sorcerers from the suffering of those who create curses. maki killed the clan because they explicitly wanted to kill her, mai and even megumi, the new head by naobito's will. she was there to pick up cursed tools and they pushed her to violence after killing her sister. unserious comparison.

Yeah...I can see where they are coming from because Geto was also pushed to extremes and was defending Mimiko and Nanako from harm, but Maki and Mai were abused by the clan, their family, their whole life. They actively tried to kill them. The only one being shown as defenceless is Maki's mother, but she had made it very clear before that she wants to see her daughters dead (she didn't actually mean it, but it doesn't matter what she secretly felt when it doesn't show in her actions). She was no better than Ogi, except she wasn't the one holding the blade. I really can't blame Maki snapping after everything that happened, especially after Mai specifically asked her to burn it all down. Like yes, Ranta seemed like he was one of the nicer ones, but that doesn't change the fact that he was part of the squad responsible for the years of abuse the twins suffered. They already knew from Toji how badly this could backfire, but they still went ahead with not treating Maki any better because she's a woman and Toji didn't retaliate against the Clan, so I guess it couldn't have been that bad... You can argue over who deserved death more than others, but that was hardly a situation for rational thought. It is very unfair to expect Maki to be the bigger person and just walk away from being nearly killed and seeing Mai murdered by their own family.

I think a big difference to Geto is also that Maki didn't go on to indiscriminately murder outside the Zenin Clan. Geto killed his own parents after the village massacre, who as far as we know never did anything wrong except being born non-sorcerers. And he kept going like that for 10 more years. Maki didn't. Hell, she even learned to somewhat reconciliate with how her mother treated her and she doesn't go on a killing spree like that among regular sorcerers, much less civilians. There's a big difference.

Also, I don't get where so many people are taking from that she just shook off the massacre like it was no big deal. She had a whole arc dedicated to dealing with the aftermath and learning to accept her body, Mai and what has happened! Maybe if people didn't skip through the Culling Game arc they'd actually know this (not that I'm bitter or anything). Like, my problem is that we never get the kind of bonding we see between her and Noritoshi or even Daido with the people who are supposed to be her friends (Yuuta, Inumaki, Panda, Nobara etc.). She is clearly affected by what happened, but nobody even asks her how she's doing. The best we get is "Maki is scary now". I would've loved to get more insight into her current mentality along the lines of the Sakurajima colony, something on how she will move on from this, how she will live now without her family (except Megumi), but we got nothing. That's my issue, not what came before. I think Perfect Preparation and Sakurajima colony were great for her character. She isn't the most expressive, but you can still see how affected she is by everything and it is directly addressed how suppressing everything isn't good for her, but then we get nothing past that.

But yeah, apparently she's less redeemable to some than Geto. Because she's cold and people don't pay attention to the arcs that actually delve into her character.

[bookish-whore]

'Til Death Part II

Rhysand x Reader

Words: 5k

Warnings: I don't think there are any besides Rhys being the most handsome and sexy high lord (jk slight reference to abuse)

A/N: Hello my darlings!! I know it's been awhile I have just been insanely busy and haven't had the time or energy to sit down and write (thank you all for your kind words, understanding, and patience it absolutely means the world to me like you have no idea)

Below is the long-awaited (and promised) second part of this series. I love you guys ❤️

"Til Death Masterlist -> Here

My Masterlist -> Here

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The room looked much different in the daylight.

That was my first thought as I blinked open my eyes and took in my surroundings. The room was still as gorgeous as it was when I walked in last night, but it all suddenly felt more real as the sunlight streamed through the large windows casting the room in a lovely morning glow.

I took some deep breaths as everything from the day prior came flooding back. I got married, and I was living in Rhysands’ townhouse. I was no longer under the control of my parents, I was safe, and I was alone and in my room, in the Night Court. Which was strange considering my entire life I was told scary stories about this place and the people that resided here. But so far it didn’t seem too bad, I didn’t see anything to be afraid of here.

Once my heartbeat slowed back to normal, I threw the covers off my body and made my way to the windows. Last night, in the dark it was hard to make out just how elegant this estate was, from my window I could see a large fountain that stood in the center of a cobblestone courtyard and a vast array of gardens with all kinds of flowers, from my position I could make out roses, wisteria, ivy, lilies, and that there was a pond and a series of walking paths.

Three raps on my door pulled me from my admiration of the estate. I wrapped my arms around myself as I turned to face the door and cleared my throat “c-come in”

The door opened to reveal a young woman. She had curly brown hair which was tied up out of her face and she had the most stunning sapphire eyes, I also noticed her attire, she had on a simple housedress with an apron which made me think she was one of the many fae that I had heard kept up the high lords’ residences.

“Good Morning Lady Y/N” she said in a soft voice as she placed a tray of food on the table by the fireplace.

“Good morning” I said following her to get a look at what kinds of food were common here in the Night Court.

“Shall I begin my duties My Lady?” she asked

“Ummm- your duties? of course, and there is no need for such formalities you can simply call me y/n”

“Of course my lady, whatever you prefer” she said as she opened the curtains before making her way to the bed

“And what shall I call you?” I asked as she made quick work of the bed, fluffing the pillows and putting them in their respective spaces.

“My name is Osha” she said softly with a nod

“Am I always expected to eat here in my chambers?” I asked

“Of course not” she exclaimed “It is just that the high lord thought it would make you more comfortable to have some time to yourself to process the excitement of the last day- and perhaps to prepare for dinner”

“What is so unique about dinner?” I asked her, helping myself to the coffee on the tray.

“Well, I would expect that he will introduce you to his most trusted advisors and friends.”

“Were they at the ceremony yesterday?” I asked as I added cream and sugar to the dark liquid

“Most likely my lady, he rarely makes any large-scale decisions or actions without them.”

“and do you think that they are good people?” I asked.

“Of course, my lady” Osha replied dusting the bookshelves and putting things in order. “they are quite respectable”

“Can I ask you a question Osha?” I asked timidly, unsure if she would simply report my actions back to Rhysand, but I accepted it would just be a risk I had to take.

“Of course, my lady” she said pausing to face me and give me her undivided attention. As though she understood that this was important to me.

“What do you think of him-” I took a shaky breath before clarifying “The high lord I mean”

Her eyes softened as she spoke about him “He is a good male; he cares deeply for his friends who are more like his family, and he is kind to his staff and his citizens. He might seem intimidating my lady, but after everything he has suffered through it is an image he must maintain. I’m sure he would tell you all about it if you asked.”

I nodded along, curious to know more about this man I was connected to, my husband.

“Thank you for being so honest, and please just call me y/n, Osha.”

“of course…m- y/n” she replied, my name sticky in her mouth as though she wasn’t used to such comfortability with members of the household “is there anything else I can do for you?”

“No Osha, I think I’ll be alright.” I said turning my attention to my breakfast.

“There’s a bell here” Osha said signaling the tasseled rope that hung by the fireplace “just give it a pull and I’ll return for the tray and to help you dress for the day” she called as she left, closing the door behind her softly.

My stomach growled in anticipation of the food; it smelled so good and I figured if Rhysand was going to harm me he would have done it before breakfast. I examined the tray deciding I would start with the sausages and before I knew it, I had devoured the entire plate.

I stood from the couch and rang the bell, wondering how quickly Osha would return. For a brief moment I hoped that I wasn’t disturbing her from her other duties.

She rapped her knuckles twice on the door announcing her arrival before stepping into the room. One thing I learned is that Osha does not waste any time, she collected all the dishes and placed them on a rolling cart outside the door before showing me to the bathroom and she promptly walked me through all the oils, salves, and lotions and what they were for before showing me how the tub operated. She even told me where all the spare items were should I ever need them.

I didn’t think I could be more grateful to her until she offered me some privacy by turning around while I undressed and stepped into the warm bubbly water. She helped me wash my hair and told me about growing up in the Night Court, she even told me about some of their annual traditions and spots in needed to visit in the city.

When we finished with the bath, she helped me into a dressing robe which I had to admit was one of the nicest fabrics I had ever put on my body. Osha instructed me to sit on one of the stools while she made work of my hair. Brushing through it gently.

I was really hoping Osha wasn’t reporting my actions back to Rhysand because I found myself answering questions about my childhood and my upbringing, I realized quickly that I could really enjoy it here.

“All finished” Osha said as she pinned the last hairs into place.

She handed me a mirror to look at her work, it was stunning yet simple. She braided my hair and pinned it into a circle around my head, with only my bangs and a few face framing pieces left out. It kind of looked like a crown, I thought to myself. “I love it” I told her as she put away the combs and remaining pins.

“Do you know what you’d like to wear today?” Osha asked as she returned to my side

“I didn’t really bring much with me from home” I said nervously

“Oh you don’t have to worry Y/n, the high lord made sure your closet was stocked so you would have options until your things arrived”  

“Why don’t you pick?” I suggested “since you know the styles here, but please keep it comfortable.”

She smiled wide before retreating to the closet. She emerged a few moments later with her choices. Osha had picked a simple white dress with long sleeves that fell off my shoulders, she had paired it with a simple light green vest-like corset embroidered with cream and pink roses and my comfortable everyday boots. I thanked Osha for her help, and she left to do what I assumed were her other duties around the house.

I took a deep breath, giving myself a once over in the mirror. I knew I wanted to explore this place a little, get to know my new home before I had dinner, before I had to see him again. I checked the clock on the wall and was surprised to find that it was already midday. I put my hand on the doorknob, took a deep breath and stepped into the hall.

It was quieter than I thought. I figured there would be an onslaught of activity, people walking around the house but there was not a soul in sight. I walked down the hall to the grand staircase Rhysand led me up last night. When I got to the bottom, I turned towards a large hall and walked towards the smell of bread.

I ended up in the kitchen, where surprisingly I found the high lord of all people.

He was sitting on top of the counter, his black suit still impeccably clean despite his relaxed posture. So far, he wasn’t at all what I expected. He saw me immediately and jumped off the counter, he waved his hand and the staff made themselves busy clearing out the room until it was just the two of us.

He took a step towards me, straightening his jacket and running a hand through his hair.

“Hello” he said, his voice low and gravelly.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt-” I quickly said, pausing to look around the kitchen “whatever it is you were doing.”

“You didn’t interrupt anything” he chuckled “I like to come in here around this time.”

“Why?” I asked

“I like the fresh bread” he replied, offering me a large piece. It was still warm from the oven, and it smelled divine. I took the piece tentatively from his hand tearing off a bite sized amount before bringing it to my lips.

I couldn’t help but moan at the taste, I wasn’t allowed such fresh helpings back home, and until now I wasn’t even aware of what I was missing. I continued pulling small pieces from the loaf and eating them as did Rhysand.

“So, how was your first night here?” he asked “did you sleep well”

“I did” I replied swallowing down another piece “and you?”

“How did I sleep?” he asked

I nodded.

“Fine, I suppose” he said with a grin

“This is strange, isn’t it?” I asked “you know being- being married yet we hardly know each other, living in the same home- it just feels so peculiar. At least it does for me”

“I think we can make the best of it” he said “like I told you yesterday, everything from here on out is up to you. you can decide what boundaries you need and I will respect them, you have my word”

“But aren’t there some things that- that are- non-negotiable?” I asked tentatively.

“Like what?” he asked, his violet eyes piercing mine as I met his gaze

“Well, you know- our” I cleared my throat bringing my voice to an almost whisper “marital duties”

“Mmmm” he sighed “yes there is that matter” his eyebrows furrowed as he took another piece of bread “What would you have us do?”

“Well are we not supposed to do what married people do?” I asked

“And what is it that married people do?” he said with a grin, his arms casually crossed over his chest.

“Now you’re just teasing me” I said rolling my eyes at the male.

“Are you demanding I perform my marital duties to you?” he asked in feigned seriousness.

“Of course I am not demanding, I am just curious that it would rouse suspicion, or possibly that there would be questions surrounding the legitimacy of our union”

“Well allow me to put your worries to rest. No one would dare ask me whether I bedded my wife, nor would I bed her without her enthusiastic consent”

I simply nodded in response, hoping he didn’t notice the slight reddening of my cheeks at his candidness.

“Like I said y/n, this arrangement benefits us both.”

“And in what ways does it possibly benefit you?”

“Do you want the truth?” he asked

“The complete and honest truth” I said “always”

“Well, it gives me a political advantage, one of my duties is presiding over the court of nightmares in the Hewn City, and to some of the more traditionalist thinkers were adamant I needed a wife, for my image and to settle concerns over the succession of my throne. And secondly, your parents offered an economic advantage; their position in the Autumn court is the perfect excuse to gather intelligence on the goings on in Beron’s lands.”

“Beron? What could you possibly want with my uncle?”

“In all honesty y/n, I can’t trust you with that information yet.” He said firmly “I hope you can understand that.”

“Of course. I mean I am still practically a stranger to you”

“I will tell you… eventually.”

“Rhysand, I-”

“And please call me Rhys”

“…Rhys…I promise I understand- really I do.”

A tense silence passed between us as I thought about my life as his partner.

“You mentioned an heir” I said breaking the tense silence that had settled between us

“I did”

“Is that- do I- am- I just-“

“Calm down y/n I don’t expect you to carry my child. Nor do I expect you to want a child. If you do I’m sure we can figure out an arrangement”

“but is that something that you would want?” I asked tentatively “I just mean that this arrangement seems to be more beneficial to me than it is to you.”

“Your part in this arrangement is crucial y/n, you’ll just have to take my word for it.”

“Okay” I agreed splitting the last of the loaf into two pieces and offering one to the high lord.

“Now” he said wiping the crumbs from his hands “How about a tour. It was late and dark last night so I didn’t want to overwhelm you with all the logistics of your space and the house”

“I would love that” I agreed

“Well then” he said motioning me towards the hall towards the entryway “Shall we?”

He followed me back to the front door and showed me the sitting room and dining room which were both adjacent to the foyer and I followed him back down the hall towards the kitchen where he pointed out a few closets, and bathrooms. Then he led me upstairs, through a series of halls pointing out each bedroom and who it belonged to. I figured it would make more sense once I met these people formally.

We continued the tour by making our way up a small spiral staircase that had been hidden behind an unassuming door until we reached an ornately carved set of double doors. He stopped in front of them, bracing one of his hands on the doorknobs, he turned them but didn’t push open the doors yet.

“Now this- is one of my favorite features in the house” he said with a grin “close your eyes”

I gave him a quizzical look before closing my eyes and putting my hand over them. I heard the soft creak as he pushed open the doors and took my hand leading me into the unknown space.

“okay” he said “open”

I opened my eyes and gasped at the space before me.

It was a library.

It had two levels of massive floor to ceiling shelves that were lined with titles, and large windows that cast the room in an abundance of natural light. There were even tall ladders that reached the very top shelves and tables and loungers strewn around the room. I felt myself get excited over the possibility of spending my time here, unbothered by the world as I disappeared into the pages that lined the walls.

“I think this is going to be my favorite place” I said turning to take in the space.

“it was my sisters favorite place” he said quietly “she would spend hours here with the people from her stories.”

“I didn’t know you had a sister. Is she around? I would love to get to know her”

He was quiet, but as I turned to face him I noticed his eyes looked sad and distant

“she is-” he cleared his throat “she is…gone”

“oh” I said reaching my hand to rest on his arm “Rhys- I am so sorry”

“You didn’t know” he said, his hand covering my own as he took us deeper into the space.

We spent what felt like hours perusing the shelves, I picked out a few titles to be sent to my room for some late-night reading and we continued on our tour. Rhys took me up the remaining flights of stairs until we reached the roof. Which boasted a view of the city, and had a lovely garden and lounge area.

Once we concluded the tour, Rhys walked me back to my room and told me about his dinner plans. He mentioned his “inner circle” and I could only imagine this was what Osha meant this morning. He told me to come down around eight and he would make introductions.

I felt nervous, what if they didn’t like me. Or they thought I was a spy for a rival court. How could I possibly convince them that I was just as desperate to escape my situation and that Rhys offered me salvation, he offered me a life of my own, where I could be free to make my own decisions. I laid in bed thinking of the ways this dinner could go horribly wrong.

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I jolted awake at the sound of knocking. I looked at the clock atop the fireplace and noticed it was already half past six. I quickly jumped from the bed to get the door as the handle turned and in walked Osha.

“I’m sorry to disturb you y/n, I just thought I would help you get ready for dinner.  I didn’t realize you were nap-”

“It’s really no trouble Osha, thank you for waking me. I- I want to look my best tonight. you know to make a good impression.”

“I think the inner circle will get along with you just fine” she said with a playful smirk.

I nodded and flashed her a nervous smile.

“Come along, I think your hair should be down tonight.” she insisted, I made no objection and sat at the vanity as she meticulously unbraided her previous work, letting my hair fall in loose waves down my back. We chatted casually as she worked pinning pieces into place and making sure it looked presentable.

I picked a black dress for tonight, I thought it was fitting considering this was Rhysand’s inner circle, his closest friends and advisors. I imagined they had spent hundreds of years together and were more like a family than anything else. It was simple, yet elegant and was surprisingly comfortable. It had long sleeves detailed with lace and a tight bodice that widened out at my waist and cascaded to the floor.

“You look perfect” Osha said as she walked around me, taking in all the details of my ensemble for tonight.

“Are you sure it’s not too much?” I asked

“Not at all y/n” she said flashing me an approving smile.

I took one last look at myself in the mirror before heading towards the door, my fae senses already picking up the faint sounds of laughter and the bustling commotion of the house workers downstairs. As I made my way down the winding staircase, I reminded myself to take deep breaths. Except my mother’s warning kept running through my head. Don’t disappoint us, remember what you were bred for.

I shook her voice from my mind as I entered the sitting room and was immediately bombarded by the blonde from the wedding, a large smile plastered across her face as she pulled me into a hug. “Y/n my dear!” she exclaimed “How are you? I do hope my cousin has been treating you well.”

“He has” I managed to say with a smile, making brief eye contact with my husband before he looked away, engaged in his conversation with the large winged males, there were two other women in the room as well seated on a sofa clearly engaged in their own conversation, they didn’t seem to pay me any mind.

“Allow me to make a few introductions, firstly and most importantly I am Morrigan, but you can call me Mor.” The blonde said with a hand to her chest, she looped her other arm through mine as she led me around the room. As we walked, she whispered low in my ear “I think were going to be great friends”. She gave my arm a gentle squeeze of reassurance as we approached the two females who straightened as we stood before them.

“This is Nesta” Mor said gesturing to the brunette female seated on the couch, Nesta looked me over and the corner of her mouth lifted slightly as if in approval. Mor turned to introduce me to the other female seated opposite Nesta but before she could say a word the raven haired woman interrupted.

“and I am Amren” she said, her voice soothing and calm

I gave them both a nod and a soft curtsy, I wasn’t entirely sure of the etiquette in this situation considering I was technically their high lady and outranked them but I figured it was a sign of respect.

“It is wonderful to finally meet you both” I said “I didn’t really have a chance to talk to everyone after the ceremony”

“Yes we made quite a hasty exit” Rhysand said as he approached behind me and Mor, he placed a hand on the small of my back and flashed me a smile as he came into view. The two males he was talking with circled the couch; I could feel their eyes on me as though they were inspecting me as one took the seat beside Nesta and the other leaned against the wall in the corner of the room, his hands resting over his chest.

“Do we not get introductions Rhysie?” the long haired one next to Nesta said with a smirk, the other male simply smiled but remained quiet in the corner of the room.

“How ever could I forget” Rhys said with a laugh as he turned to face me more directly “Y/n, this is Cassian, general of the Night Court armies, and a general pain in my ass.”

“I love you too brother” Cassian said as he moved his arm to rest behind Nesta.

“And this-” Rhys said with a gesture to the male in the corner “Is my spymaster and shadowsinger, Azriel. And it seems that you’ve met the others.”

“I did” I said looking over the group “I just want to say that I really am happy to finally meet you all, I’ve heard how important you are to Rhysand, and I only hope that you’ll give me a chance to prove myself useful here.”

“So long as you remain honest, I don’t think we’ll have a problem girl” Amren said sipping from her embellished glass.

“Well now that introductions have been made, how about we talk over dinner and drink?” Rhysand said gesturing towards the dining room. The inner circle all stood and made their way to the room across the hall, Rhys gripped my hand before I could step away.

“Can I have a word, before we join the others?” he asked

“Of course,” I said as he led me to the back corner of the room, no doubt away from prying fae ears

“I just want to warn you, they are going to ask you questions, they are going to pry but they mean well”

“I would be concerned if they just accepted me without a qualm” I said with a forced smile

“You don’t have to answer anything you aren’t comfortable with, they do understand boundaries they just feel the need to test them.” He grasped my hands in his “they just want to get to know you, and if at any point you feel stuck just ask them questions, especially Mor because once she starts talking it’s hard to get her to stop.”

“noted” I said looking towards the floor

“You have nothing to worry about y/n” Rhys reassured me, I felt his hand grip my chin turning my face to meet his “and I didn’t get a chance to tell you earlier tonight y/n but you…you are absolutely breathtaking.”

“Are you two planning on joining us anytime soon” Cassian’s voice boomed

“Always so subtle that one” I said in a whisper as I made my way towards the group. I was hyper-aware of Rhys’ presence behind me as we entered the space and took our seats at the table, his at the head, and mine to his right.

Dinner passed with polite conversation, by the main course of roasted lamb and potatoes I was beginning to relax. They didn’t seem to be too prying; they only asked me questions about where I grew up and what I enjoyed. In the back of my mind, I was slightly concerned they were lulling me into a false sense of security but I doused my fear by the time we came to dessert, which just so happened to be my favorite, chocolate souffle.

“So, what was it like growing up around Eris” Mor asked taking a bite of her dessert

“I wouldn’t know” I said honestly

“But you spent so much time at the Forest House?” Mor retorted

“my parents kept me pretty secluded with my lessons” I said “I would be punished for even looking at the Vanserra boys, let alone speaking to them” I couldn’t help but chuckle at the memory of the lashing I received for merely smiling at Eris when we crossed paths in the hall

The room went silent at my confession, perhaps they had realized just how useless I was. That I didn’t have any of the information they wanted. I could feel myself spiraling, the walls closing in, my breathing speeding up and as if he could sense my panic, Rhys cleared his throat, drawing the attention away from me, which I was overwhelmingly grateful for.

“I think that’s enough for tonight, its quite late and I’m sure y/n is exhausted” he said a clear dismissal of the party, his inner circle slowly dissipated with their goodbyes until it was just the high lord and me remaining.

“Shall we?” he asked holding his hand out to me, I eagerly took it and Rhys walked me to my bedroom, stopping at the door and leaning casually against it his arms crossed over his broad chest. I couldn’t help but notice the strain of fabric at his upper arms. He must have spent decades strengthening his body into a lethal weapon…No, I couldn’t think of him like this

I didn’t realize how close he was until his scent overwhelmed me, rain and cedar. I casually threw my hair over my shoulder as I stood shoulder to shoulder with the male. My hand resting on the doorknob, I gripped it but couldn’t bring myself to open the door. I hesitated, realizing that I didn’t want the night to end.

“Rhys” I said tentatively, soothing my nerves as I let go of the ornate handle and turned fully to face the high lord.

“Yes?” he asked, standing to his full height, his eyes piercing through me as I craned my neck to meet his gaze.

“I just wanted to-” I cleared my throat “to thank you- for introducing me to everyone, and for showing me around today. I-It means a lot to me that you have made me feel at home here”

“it was my pleasure y/n, and they seemed to like you. I’m sure you’ll get more comfortable around them with time.”

“I hope so” I said “because I really want this to work…for the both of us”

“And I have every confidence that it will” he said reassuringly “but you need to get some rest, it has been an exhausting day”

“if you insist” I said twisting the door handle, opening the door of my room.

“Sweet dreams…wife” he teased with a sly smile and a dark look in his violet eyes

“Sweet dreams…husband” I said as I stepped through the threshold into my room, closing the door softly behind me.

I couldn’t help but smile as I prepared myself for bed, and here in my solitude I could convince myself that it had nothing to do with the roguishly handsome high lord and his violet eyes that saw right through all my defenses. Here in the shadows, I could remain in denial because I was in deep shit.

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[bone-enthusiast]

It has become a hobby of mine to spontaneously rewatch fandoms and whatnot, decided to rewatch a bit of metal family and realized something.

this.

i know this is just an image of glam concerningly staring at his friend, ches, but it means so much more than that.

with the context of the following scene, glam almost gets hit by a beer bottle thrown at the two by ches's mother. after that, he doesn't just continue staring at his friend's mom in fear, but... he stares at ches.

from episode 9, ches explains to glam on how lucky he is that he got first place at the conservatory. glam replies that his parents must be proud of him, for the amount of dedication ches puts though in his music (especially being self-taught). but when episode 10 reveals what his living situation is like, it's heartbreaking. sure his mother could just be drunk and y'know how drunk people say things they don't mean to, but it's clear that ches has to deal with this like all the time.

but that aside, knowing what glam's living situation was like in contrast, this is the context he gets with how ches lives. he doesn't know anything about his mother, even trying to talk to ches about it afterward. but that look, that glance, that stare. he's dealt with abuse for sure, and seeing his friend have a mother that just tried to hit him, seeing someone that what he thought at this moment that had to deal with the same-ish things he did, he feels a sense of relatability and concern towards him.

anyways uhh yeah that's my little explanation of that one frame that always hurts every time i watch it so hopefully you now feel that too.

[pick-me-up-im-scared]

So Called Revenge (Hiccup x Reader) (Angst)

Author's Note: I felt like doing a one-shot where the reader gets treated shitty, but then gets revenge. I've read stories where the gang (minus Hiccup) treats the reader bad, and I've always thought "but where's the revenge?". So, now I've taken matters in my own hands and wrote the ultimate badass respond. I'm clearly going through something, haha. I'm sorry Astrid for taking it out on you...

Short Summary: You’re getting abused by the dragon riders, both mentally and physically. Ever since you were a kid they seem to have something against you. Though there’s one person who’s not mean to you. Hiccup. You’ve been friends with him for a while now and your getting along very well. Matter of fact, you have a crush on him.

⚠️Warning!⚠️: This story includes swearing and gore and a brief suicide scene.

And if you're very prude, you might consider that this story including smut. There's no sexual acts, just some light "describing".

(y/n/n) = your nickname

Words: 4489

(I don't own any of the GIFs)

Your pov:

Another day in the beloved village called Berk. Notice my sarcasm. Well let's be clear, it's not necessarily the village that's the problem. Rather the people living in it. Even more specifically, a group of dragon riders. My life hasn't been the best, but it could be worse. That's until I hit my teenage years and the dragon riders decided to make my life a living hell. Don't get me wrong, they've had a thing against me all my life. But it's been more physical in the later years. Don't ask me why. Though there's one exception. Hiccup. He´s never said anything rude to me nor laid a hand on me. I think it's cause he feels pity for me. He knows how it feels to be nagged down. Also, the boy doesn't have a bad bone in his body, so he would never even consider doing such an act. And he'd definitely stop them if it wasn't for the fact they never do anything when he's around. They're smart. They know what consequences their actions could lead to if the Chief saw this type of behavior.

But Hiccup and I have more "history" then this. Well, history and history. He tried to interact with me back when we were 15, cause..... well, we were in the same boat. Though I would love to be friends with him, I couldn't even look at him for more then five seconds. Okay, I'll admit it, I have had a crush on Hiccup ever since we were 15. Why not confess your feelings for him? Hum? Well, he's already taken. And Astrid doesn't seem to like me that much to begin with, and I don´t think she would be more found of me if she finds out I've fallen for her boyfriend. Even though I regret not socializing with Hiccup straight from the beginning I've made up for it over the few years. We've grown pretty close, actually. We soon found out we shared an interest in sketching. He loved to watch as my talented hands worked their magic in my sketchbook. I still remember the day he asked me to make a portrait of him. Let me tell you, if I hadn't fallen in love with him already spending 1,5 hours, looking at his gorgeous, freckled face sure would. If you look past the sweating, butterflies in the stomach, and the shaking due to my nerves, I really like to spend time with Hiccup.

I dragged my limping body towards my dresser, changing into my regular outfit. I got down the stairs to make myself some breakfast. Me and my brother barely see each other throughout the day. Just a quick 'hello' or a simple wave whenever we saw each other around the village. It isn't until he comes home at the evening we could properly interact. But he's usually too exhausted by the day's hard work so we just eat dinner then he's off to bed. Due to our 'situation' he has to work harder in order to provide for the both of us. Both our parents has, unfortunately, passed away. Mother died from pestilence, three years ago. No chance of survival, just counting the days she had left. Our whole family got affected by our mother's death, though our father took it the worse. He fell into a deep depression which lead to him taking his life two years later. He hang himself from the wooden beam in their, well his, bedroom. Leaving me and Christopher to take care of our selfs. Remember the part where Hiccup felt bad for me? Yeah, I think this has some reasons for that too.

I did my part, but my payment wasn't in much help in the long run. So I'd stand for the cooking and taking care of the household to try to make it up for him. Especially the long nights. You see, the gang doesn't "just" call me name or tell me what a disappointment I am to my family. There's been a couple of times where they've hurt me physically, too. Punches against the face, kicks in the stomach, even cuts at various body parts. And who has to patch me up again? Christopher. I get mad at myself for not fitting in. Making my brother lack in sleep because I can't stop being seen as a burden. I see Hiccup as my best, well my only, friend and trust him with all of my problems. But how could I tell him his girlfriend and his friends mentally and physically abuse me? He wouldn't believe me. So I try ti stay away from them, but more importantly don´t be around them on my own.

Once the dry slice of bread was washed down by a glass of lukewarm water I was ready to start my day. I opened up the door to be met by grey clouds. This would actually be considered as nice weather for Berk, since we're used to pouring rain or hail. I walked down the village. Noticing my brother at his second shift at the blacksmith. I gave him a wave once we had eye contact. He gave me a warm smile, since his hands were too busy to answer me with a wave back. I chuckled for myself until my eyes fell onto another familiar face. Hiccup. I stopped in my tracks. He was chatting with the rest of the gang, just outside The Great Hall. I got a bellyache just looking at them. Of course Hiccup isn't the reason to my abrupt stop. If it would have been just him and Toothless I would have ran up and hugged him, chatting about something random like we always do. But his company prevent that from happening. Constant flashback of the last solo "meeting" with the rest of the gang went through my head.

I shield my face with my right hand as I quicken the pace, hoping to get away from them as fast as possible. Without getting noticed. "Hey (y/n/n)!" I cringed before looking up to see Hiccup waving me over. Damn it! He saw me. I walked over to the gang, trying not to look too suspicious where Hiccup would notice. It took every nerve in my body to walk over there, being terrified to find out what they'll do if Hiccup leaves. As I reached them Hiccup wrapped his arm around my shoulder while looking down at me, smiling warmly "How are you today, (y/n/n)?". I could tell Astrid's starting to get pissed by the way he approached me. I removed his arm while laughing nervously "I'm great, Hiccup. Thanks for asking". He nodded, giving me another smile. They went back to their own conversations, not really giving me the opportunity to flick in. I began feeling really awkward, just standing there. Seeing this as my opportunity to avoid getting beaten up, I tried to sneak away. As I turned my back to run off, thinking I successfully left without anyone noticing, I felt a pair of arms around my waist. Damn it!

I got dragged back to the group, my hopes of getting back to my house went further and further away. Getting back to the exact position I was in just a few seconds ago Hiccup held his arm around me to prevent me from leaving again. "Where were you going?" he asked as he tried to study my face. I sighed "Nowhere". He looked suspiciously at me, but didn't ask any further. "So (y/n), we were wondering if you wanted come fly with us?" Hiccup asked with his adorable smile. "Uhm, I don't have a dragon, so... very sorry Hiccup but unfortunat-" "You can fly with me and Toothless" he interrupted before I could finish my excuse as to why I 'unfortunately' couldn't join them. I glanced at Astrid before looking back at him "You don't have to. I'll be fine right here". Hiccup chuckled "Stop it, I know how much you like to fly when we're alone" Astrid's eyes widened. "You're coming. That's a Chief's order" he joked.

"I'm just going to do... some manly businesses, then we're ready to go!" Hiccup informed before starting to walked off. I looked at the group who already smirked at me, giving me an idea of what's to come. Answering with a worried look I quickly grabbed Hiccup's upper arm, making him stop. "I-I'll go with you" I said, trying to cover up how terrified I actually am. He looked at me for a while before saying "Uhm.... I'm going to pee, (y/n/n)". I began to panic even more "I know, but you know, it's always better to do things together" I laughed nervously again "I..... I c-can keep you company!". He looked at me confused "It's just around the corner, I'll be quick". "Oh, babe. Could you get me my spare sweatshirt? I seem to have forgotten it at home" Astrid asked, knowing all too well what she's doing. "Yeah, sure! (y/n) it'll take a bit longer including that, but I'll be back as soon as possible" I listen as my last bit of hope blew away. I'm screwed! I watched as Hiccup left.

"He's nice, isn't he?", I snapped my head towards a smirking Astrid. "Huh?" I asked rather confused. Was she genuinely asking or was this some sort of trick? My question was soon answered as Astrid punched me straight in the face, making me fall to the ground. As I dragged my hand under my nose I saw blood. I tried to swipe it up with the sleeve of my tunic. Hiccup can't see this! I looked up at Astrid as she continued "I've seen the way you look at him. But he's mine, and I don't like other girls looking at my boyfriend". "Why? You're afraid he'll leave you for me?" I snapped back, but immediately regret giving such a cocky comeback. Her eyes widened before she punched me again, this time focusing on my eye. My head fell back with the sudden dizziness.

Astrid grabbed me by the hair to keep my head up while she spoke to me "I don't need to worry about you. Sluts isn’t his favorite anyway". She lets go off my hair and instead grabbed my wrist, pressing it against the ground while she strangled me. I grabbed her face with my other hand, trying to make her get off me. "Hey, Snotlout! Grab her other wrist!" she ordered, and soon both my wrists were against the muddy ground. Astrid brought out her dagger. She motioned to Snotlout who lifted up my navy tunic to my neck, exposing my bare chest to the rest of the gang who were circling us. Both to get a better look at what was happening and to cover up the ongoing situation from the people walking by. They laugh at the sight, which made me fight even harder to get out of their grip. I need to get out of here. Come on (y/n)! Come on!

"Let's see what the guys think when your breasts are butchered" Astrid said when she slide the knife over my exposed chest. I bit my lip at first to prevent myself from screaming, knowing they'll punish me hard if I do. But as she continued to slice my flesh I screamed out in pain. Snotlout was quick to cover my mouth until the damage was done. Astrid smirked devilish at her work as I panted heavily. Snotlout let's go of my wrist, figuring I wouldn't have the energy to do anything anyway. "From what I've heard your bed's pretty busy. At least that's what Calvin said", my eyes widened at the mentioning of his name. Calvin were my ex boyfriend, who I've spent 2 years of my life with. Based on his personality, I wasn't surprised he talked to the gang behind my back. What I'm nervous about is what he told them. You'd think I'm over a relationship that ended 2 years ago, but how can I when it's constantly brought up?

"He would brag about taking your virginity before you were wed" Astrid continued. "No he didn't" I said unsurely, looking up at the rest of the gang that still surrounded me. "Yeah he did. What type of things you were willing to do. The slutty behavior you would take on. I still remember Hiccup's disgusted face when he told us" Astrid continued. He told Hiccup, too? "Stop it!" I screamed, tears steaming down my cheeks. "I know Hiccup well enough to know he doesn't like girls with slutty behaviors like yours. He like his girls virgin and pure. Not someone who's willing to spread her legs at any guy that gives her a little attention. Not that you had a chance with him to begin with" she laughed while looking down at me. My blood was pumping with anger as she continued to lie. Even though all I felt was anger, my words just came out as whispering "Please stop" why wouldn't she stop? "What? I'm just telling you the truth. You're sad now that your imaginary fairytale wouldn't come true, cause Hiccup wouldn't even touch you with a stick?" my blood was boiling more and more with every word Astrid feed me "Come on, (y/n)! Don't aim at guys that's out of your league. It's only pathetic. You know they only want you for what's in your pant-". Astrid was cut off as I pushed her off me and slammed her against a house. I wrapped my fingers around her neck and began to choke her.

"I said stop it!" I yelled straight in her face, not being able to handle the anger that was built up inside of me. "Why won't you listen for once and shut the fuck up?" I said through gritted teeth as I squeeze my hands harder around her neck. "(y/n) stop! She can't breathe!" Snotlout yelled as he approached us. "Don't you dare fucking touch me again!" I snapped back, not taking my eyes off Astrid. A satisfaction filled my body as I saw Astrid chip for air. All the anger I've kept inside from all the things she'd said and all the gestures was being thrown into this moment. I heard Snotlout's steps behind me again. Not wanting to risk this opportunity being disturb I pulled Astrid away from the house wall and put her in a chokehold instead. We turned around quickly to face the rest of the group "I said stay away!" I yelled. Thank gods Astrid wasn't able to fight back due to her unconsciousness, otherwise she'd easily take me down. Snotlout was still walking towards us, making me sigh.

I grabbed Astrid's dagger and threw it at Snotlout's thigh. He screamed out in pain before dropping to the ground. I grabbed my own dagger and pointed it towards the rest of the gang who slowly backed away. The pain of Astrid pressed against my opened wounds was nothing compared to the satisfaction. The satisfaction of finally getting my revenge. "(y/n)!", I snapped out off my focus at the yelling of my name by a familiar voice. Tuffnut took this opportunity to unwrap my arm around Astrid's neck while shoving me to the ground. As I looked up I saw Hiccup rubbing Astrid's back as she was coughing like crazy. He looked at Snotlout who's moaning in pain while laying on the ground, before he turned to me. "(y/n)! What did you do this for?" Hiccup asked with an angry tone. He was clearly pissed off, but why? If he had heard just one of the things she was saying we wouldn't have this discussion now.

"She started it!" I said while pointing to Astrid. Hiccup rolled his eyes, clearly not believing me, "Oh come on, (y/n)! Stop act so childish! You could have killed her!" he raised his voice again, especially at that last part. "Too bad you pushed me away, or I could have killed that bitch" I mumbled. Hiccup snapped his head, staring daggers into me "What did you just say?". I'm not back out of this. I stand for what I think, I'm not going lower myself to that pest's level. "I said, too bad you pushed me away, or I could have killed that bitch!" I repeated while standing up with grace, ignoring the pain. Hiccup couldn't believe what I had just said, even though he heard me the first time. He didn't know what to say. His eyes just looked at me with disgust. I brushed off my pants before making my way back to my hut. As I walked past Astrid I quickly went up to her and kicked her in the stomach. I smirked as I walked off, fulfilling my goal of making her feel at least a tenth of the pain she'd caused me. I ignore Hiccup's upset calls for me, and the rest of the gang's insults that was being thrown.

Hiccup's pov:

"You're so delusional, Hiccup" Christopher, (y/n)'s bother, said while I tried my best to comfort Astrid. She didn't coughing anymore, but she was still holding on tight to my shoulders. I sighed and turned to Christopher "What? Your sister were about kill my girlfriend. If there's one thing I'm not it's delusional". "You can't be this stupid, right?", I felt Astrid stiffing in my arms but played it off as fear. "If Tuffnut wouldn't have pushed (y/n) away she would have kept going until Astrid stopped breathing. Or did I get that part wrong?" I asked sarcastically. "Yeah, she probably would, but she had her reasons". I let go of Astrid to stand up and walk over to Christopher. "Oh, please tell me what reasons she had that would make it sain to kill someone!" I yelled. My gods, what's up with this family? "Because Astrid would do the same to her!" I got a bit taken away by the tone of his voice.

"You all would" Christopher gestured to the whole gang, who looked down in shame. What are they doing? Is this true? "They would never do such a thing" I defending the gang, praying to the gods this isn't true. Christopher huffed "You haven't seen what they've done to her, Hiccup. The deep wounds I've had to clean up. The painful screams and sleepless nights. The old wounds barely having a chance to heal until they're met by one ones. Words a 13 year old girl shouldn't even know exist, non the less being called. All the death threats and names being thrown at her. How would you like it to be called 'a useless whore who's the reason her father killed himself'?". I flinched at the harsh words. My eyes began to get glossy as the information gets feed into my head. What have I done?

"And for you to call yourself Chief and don't know anything about it" he said while poked his finger at my chest before walking away. I look around at the gang while asking "Is this true?". My expression showed the guilty I was feeling. "Is what true?" Snotlout asked, playing dumb. "Have you told (y/n) those awful things and abused her behind my back?" I spat, already knowing the answer based on Snotlout's unnecessary question. I cringed as the words came out of my mouth. I can't believe someone would say and do those things to (y/n). The sweet and beautiful girl I´m happy to even call my friend. For people to say that is fucked up, but these people also being the people I refer to as friends. And my fucking girlfriend being the worse? After some time they all nodded, making me feel like throwing up. Everyone expect Astrid. I walked up to her, not even bothering to hunch down to her level. I looked down at her and asked "Have you been apart of any of these actions, Astrid?" She looked at me nervously, not being able to have eye contact with me for more than a second. "No, I would never do such horrible things, Hic. Not to our beloved (y/n/n)". I knew she would lie. "Why are you lying to me?" I ask with a sturdy tone. Her face dropped "I'm not, Hi-". I cut her off by turning my back to her, walking away.

The information Christopher told me clouded my mind. He's right, I am a useless Chief, even more a friend. If I were a good friend I would have noticed this way before. This explains why she never wanted to come down to the lake to swim. Why she'd stay home for days at the time once she'd been felt with the gang by herself. Gods, I'm an idiot for not connecting the dots! I could feel the tears forming in my eyes, but I quickly blinked them away. I can be the one crying when I'm the asshole. I walked up the porch till I was right in front of the familiar door. I knock. I heard Christopher's voice from inside "(y/n), I told you to sit down and rest! I can answer the door!". I heard uneven steps getting closer and closer.

As the door opened I could see (y/n) limping as she took another step towards the doorway. She supported herself against the handle which allowed me to see the bandage that covered most of her upper body though her opened shirt. What have they done to her? My poor (y/n). She widened her eyes when she saw me. I could tell she immediately tried to hide any signs of her injury, straighten her back. "Are you here to continue yelling at me?" she asked bluntly. I shook my head. "If you're here to receive an apology, you can fuck off! I'm not sorry for finally putting that pathetic bitch in her place" I tensed up a bit at her harsh words, but then remembered the things they've done to her. Now the guilt came back "Yeah, about that, I'm so sorry (y/n). I should have listened to yo-" "Yeah, yeah, whatever. Bye" she cut me off and slammed the door right in my face. Okay, I deserved that. I decided there's no need to knock again. She wouldn't answer it anyway.

I was actually quite surprised to see her at The Great Hall at lunch time. She had a plate of food in front of her, but by the looks of it she hadn't touched it. I grabbed my own plate and made my way over to her table. "Is this seat taken?" I asked, pointing at the spot in front of her. She look at me for a while before shaking her head. I sat down and she immediately turned her head, not wanting to look at me. "Chicken isn't your favorite?" I asked jokingly. "There's other things that makes me lose my apatite" she answered brutally, still looking at the floor beside her. I sighed "Look (y/n/n) I-" "Don't call me that!" she snapped. I jumped at her sudden outburst "Okay, sorry.... (y/n), I'm so sorry, I truly am. I should have trusted you. It's just- I never thought Astrid or any of the others would ever do anything like this to you. Not in my wildest, darkest imagination".

"Well they did" she bite back. "I know, and I don't know what to do to make it up to you. I truly care for you (y/n), and I can't forgive myself for letting you go through this for so long" I caressed her shoulder while pouring out my feelings. She look at me shocked "I-I love you, Hiccup". Now it's my turn to be shocked. S-she l-loves me? "I-I'm sorry, what was that?" I asked, wanting to make sure I heard her correct. "I love you, Hiccup. I have ever since we were 15. I wouldn't socialize with you because I got so nervous whenever you were around. I know we'll never be anything, so I've tried to hide my feelings for you. But I guess Astrid noticed it anyway. Half of the things she told me was surrounding that. Me having a crush on you". Okay, Christopher definitely didn't tell me that. She took a deep breath before she continued "I know you're with Astrid, and I don't mean to ruin anything. I just felt the need to confess and now seemed like a good time". She lowered her gaze in order to avoid eye contact.

I sat with my mouth wide open. I can't believe what she just confessed. She love me? She has loved me for six years and she hasn't told me? "Y-you love me?" I asked, still not sure if this was a dream or not. She nodded. "You can go back to your gang now. I won't bother you anymore, don't worry" she informed before standing up and leave. Due to my shock my reactions were a bit delayed. But as soon as my mind was coping the situation I raised up and ran towards her "(y/n) wait!". Once I caught up with her I noticed the tears running down her cheeks "Hiccup, please don't make this harder then it already is" she cried out "Try to forget about me and go to your girlfriend". As she finished her sentence I grabbed her cheeks and kissed her. I could tell she was shocked but soon gave in. As we pulled away she looked at me confused. "She's right here... in front of me" I said while smiling at her. She smiled back before pulling me into another kiss.

_____________________________________________________________

Author's Note: Not how I planned to end this story, but it's cute. Though I would like to know your opinion on endings. Do you like having them being sad (if it's allowed), or do you like this cutesy 'live happily ever after'- type of endings?

[allamericansbitch]

If I may weigh in again because I've been thinking about this nearly all day you're right that it really does not matter whether or not Taylor is mentally ill, and she is not in anyway obligated to discuss her mental health publicly. If she were mentally if, if she was so mentally ill and physiologically resistant to medication that her best option was ECT, it would not change the fact that what she is doing now is sensationalising both mental illness and ECT. There is no ethical way to sensationalise something - exoticisation is inherently racist, fetishising queerness is inherently queer-phobic, and aestheticising mental illness is inherently abelistic. No one is saying that she isn't allowed to engage with the concept of mental illness in her music and performances. What we are saying is that the way she is doing so is incredibly insensitive. She consistently denigrates someone else for being depressed, and having substance abuse issues in TTPD, then turns around and co-opts both those things in a highly performative, trivialising way.

The contrast between the accusatory way she says "You needed me but you needed drugs more" and the flippant delivery of "I was high functioning alcoholic/until nobody noticed my new aesthetic" makes it very clear that she is not approaching substance abuse with any gravity at all - in the first instance she only cares that it's getting in the way of someone loving her in the way she ways, and in the second instance she explicitly states that she views alcoholism as a personality to role-play for attention.

"Here we go again/the voices in his head/called again to end our days of wild" very succinctly embodies a recurring issue in the album - He implicitly has persistent, capital-letter mental health issues, and she is fed up of them interfering with her ability to have fun. She is very clearly trivialising someone's mental health issues, and expecting sympathy for having been victimised and "broken" by it. He's not mean to her, doesn't do anything to her, she's just tired of his problems -- and that's the feeling we're expected to be sympathetic towards, that's what's being valued over mental illness.

And all this is directly harmful. The wide-spread trivialisation of mental illness means that people have a harder time being taken seriously by professionals, it means that their friends, peers, co-workers, bosses, parents, teachers etc, don't understand the extent to which mental illness affects a person's life. Perhaps most dangerously of all, it means that the mentally ill individual may not understand that what they're experiencing isn't normal because the language of their experience has been misappropriated into a causal context. I understand that she's just following a trend, but in following it, she's also perpetuating it in a very big way because unfortunately, we live in a world where she has much more influence than anybody actually qualified to talk about mental health.

(I wanted to rant a little about how disgusting the TTPD choreo is from both a mental health and feminist perspective, but this is probably already way too long.)

yes YES YES! all this is exactly it. no one's saying she isnt allowed to talk about mental health issues or specifically her struggles with it, of course she can. it's the way she's choosing to express it that's just very problematic and she's ignoring the problematic history of and trivializing them for performance/aesthetic purposes. she's just treating every issue she discusses with no empathy or gravity. she repeatedly treats others with mental health issues as a liability but then we should feel sad for her when she didn't feel bad for anyone else.

and the last part is just perfect and wanna reiterate it:

"I understand that she's just following a trend, but in following it, she's also perpetuating it in a very big way because unfortunately, we live in a world where she has much more influence than anybody actually qualified to talk about mental health."

[yellowcry]

Where's my friend the Smiley?

One by one, Pedro just seemed to abandon him It's Luisa. Of course. Everything is always her fault

Another work for Pedro ruins lives by @miracles-and-butterflies (How did I become a writer for this?? I have no idea what I'm doing for that point)

TW: implied/referenced child abuse and suicide

Bruno was the first one. No one knew what happened. There were no warning signs. One morning he just was nowhere. Disappeared in the darkness. Pedro tried his best to find him. But no matter what, it didn't help at all. Bruno wasn't here anymore. He never returned, no matter how many prayers Pedro had said.

His heart was shattered into a thousand pieces. During all his life he was nothing but a decent and caring father for his son with such a worthless gift. And that's what he got in return? Being abandoned by his own child? Who could even put this idea in his head? 

Luisa.

Of course, it's her. There had to be a reason why she didn't get a gift. She did something bad. Maybe she wanted to hurt the family and the miracle knew it. Sadly, it didn't prevent her from doing whatever she did to Bruno. But it didn't mean she would avoid a fair punishment. Pedro would make sure she didn't get away with this. As much as Pedro loved Bruno, his gift was really unimportant if you look at it with an objective view.  It was better than losing somebody else. If he took care of Luisa's behavior now, he would save so many problems. At least prevent the others from leaving Encanto behind.

He made sure Luisa knew her place since the moment she didn't get a gift. He made sure she realized that her parents would never want a giftless child. But it seemed that he hadn't done enough. Luisa managed to make Bruno leave. 

"I didn't do anything!" She insisted, hearing a dose of blame. What a liar. Acting like an innocent lamb

Pedro looked down at her, how could such a little child cause something this horrific. "I don't want to hear your excuses any longer." 

Luisa swore that she hadn't done anything. But it was obvious. She was giftless, a clear sign of being a problem. Maybe she manipulated her Tío, maybe he was so ashamed that he decided that leaving was the best option. That being homeless or dead was better than being related to her.

At least, now the rest of the family was safe. Pedro made sure Luisa realized her mistake. She didn't talk to anyone now. So it would be almost impossible for her to cause someone else to leave.

***

It didn't work. 

The second one was Dolores. Just the day she turned eighteen she had leave. And it wasn't even like with Bruno who had left most of his belongings. She took everything she could. If with his son Pedro could hope that he would return, with Dolores it was obvious. She had planned it. She planned to abandon this family. She hurt her parents, her cousins. And she hurt Pedro too. Most people would be jealous to have him as a grandfather and now she throws it away! 

What had Luisa done? Did she say something to her? Like she did with Bruno? Of course. It's always her. Why couldn't she stay out of the way and stop hurting this family? Pedro was too kind to her after Bruno had left. Now he was paying with his granddaughter. Dolores was one of the little amount of family members who weren't completely useless.

If Luisa wanted to ruin this family, she would be treated accordingly. 

Her breathing hitched at another blow. "I promise, I don't know—"

Pedro made sure the ropes were tight enough so she wouldn't break free. Luisa had enough muscles and was definitely stronger than Pedro in his seventies. Her arms were red while she struggled against the rope that dug into her skin. Maybe it would teach her a lesson. Maybe she would stop hurting this family.

***

Pedro should know better. 

It wasn't just one. Four of his family had left. Pepa and Felix took their sons and abandoned them. Just like their daughter. Just like his son. Why was everyone so ungrateful? Pedro spent years, building this family. Teaching Pepa to stop being so uselessly emotional. Not only emotions were hurtful, but hers could cause a whole hurricane. And her eldest son wasn't much better. He had to cook food for the village, not burn the kitchen each time he walked in there. 

And Antonio was so young! How would he remembers his family if he couldn't see them? He would never learn about his Abuela or the Miracle? How would he earn a gift? What if he was supposed to get the greatest gift of all?

Luisa did something. She had always done something bad. Pedro had no idea how she managed to keep up with this. Maybe they were ashamed of her, maybe she talked them into it. When Pedro wasn't looking. She seemed to barely talk with anyone these days. But he wouldn't be surprised if it was just an act. Of course, it would be an act. 

Luisa struggled less this time. She was fighting weaker and weaker with each punishment. Maybe she had learned her lesson, but he couldn't hope for that. He thought she did atter, Dolores. Pedro lost two of his kids and three grandchildren. He wouldn't bear losing someone else.

***

He did. And this time there wasn't even a slightest possibility to hope that she would return. 

How could Mirabel take her own life? How much was she ashamed of Luisa that she decided to take her own life? Luisa had already ruined Mirabel's life by making her get completely useless gift that was worth nothing. Now it was something even worse.

She begged for him to stop. After everything she did. Mirabel was dead because of her. Luisa was the one to blame. She was always the guilty one. Causing problems, forcing the family to run as far away as possible without any warnings. Was it some kind of a sick joke to her? She made almost everyone leave! And now she dared to cry after driving Mirabel to suicide! It was so sick. Completely horrifying selfishness. 

 

As time passed, Luisa didn't even deny her guilt anymore. She didn't fight back or try to defend herself. The last time she did was on the day Mirabel had died.

"I'm sorry," She whined, trembling in pain. She had to feel what she made them feel. Know how much she had hurt everyone. So much so that they ran away from Encanto.

Pedro hoped she was. It wouldn't return anybody. But maybe at least those bits of the family he had left were safe.  

[carefulfears]

Yes! It’s especially insane with Phoebe bc like the show goes out of it’s way to explicitly show how fucked up she was idk how people forget it

yep yep yep!! it's quite literally the entire point of the episode. but i still see people all the time like...calling mulder stupid for "trusting" her and making jokes about the way he behaves around her and it's just like...please don't piss me off. same exact thing with diana.

fire is one of my favorite episodes though i think it's such an interesting look at mulder's character and example of the ways that he views and interacts with people close to him

because he understands and acknowledges from the very beginning that phoebe's just there to fuck with him, that she made the trip from boston to DC to bring him in on the investigation for no reason other than knowing that it will scare him

he knows what she’s doing, and he still agrees to help her

his only concession being that scully not be involved

noting that he's not going to "put her through" phoebe's games

this is something that we've seen him do before, with his former partner jerry earlier in season one, who broke into his office and stole his work.

it's clear throughout ghost in the machine that mulder isn't comfortable working with him, but helps him anyway because jerry asked him to

and builds him up when jerry is feeling insecure

he infamously does it again with diana, always affording her the benefit of the doubt and defending her

and with his parents, consistently coming whenever they call, despite all of their lies and neglect

(side note from pulling ghost in the machine caps but his ties in this ep are soooo classic baby spooky i miss s1 soooo much)

anyway, this is the dynamic that fire circles around, and the only time in the episode that mulder pushes back against phoebe is when he cracks this joke about having a "refined technique" with women who cheat

which he apologizes for instantly, recognizing that it upset her

fire is also one of the best portrayals of the true sign of a toxic/abusive relationship: not realizing anything is wrong with it until you tell your best friend

i see criticism of this episode sometimes that interprets it as glorifying phoebe, portraying her as sexy and her behavior as righteous, but i disagree.

i don't think that you can base the episode's stance on phoebe on mulder's behavior, he's responding to her through a very warped and controlled lens. just because he views her in a positive light, doesn't mean that we should as the audience.

whereas, scully is immediately wary of phoebe and critical of her, even before knowing the context for her actions.

this shot is my favorite lmao. she is contemplating murder. she is wondering if she could get away with it.

her lil passive aggressive "bye bitch" finger wave

her "mmmmyeah sure sherlock"

her watchful eye as she hangs in the doorway while mulder and phoebe meet with the arson specialist

she literally sits at his desk in his chair and waits for him just to make this sherlock holmes joke 😭😭😭 they are BEST friends

now, this is when she finds out the true history with phoebe, and the reason behind her visit. and it's when mulder tells her that she's off the case.

and from that point, scully starts investigating the murders herself, consulting her own sources to put together her own theories

while these two do absolutely fuck all

she shows up uninvited at the event in boston, having SOLVED THE CASE HER-FUCKING-SELF

and she's the only one who gives a fuck when mulder gets hurt

while phoebe shakes hands and schmoozes at the party

sweetie pie making sure her partner gets some water and some rest

now, dana 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

after making sure mulder is okay (and getting a peek at him shirtless) she shows him the evidence that she found, telling him that she just "didn't know a whole lot about arson" so took the opportunity to do some research "for my own edification, of course" GIRLLLLL

and they identify the groundskeeper as the murderer based on the information that she gathered

the face of a woman who single-handedly solved a string of serial murders to get her best friend's bitch of an ex away from him. she is truly an inspiration to us all.

and she has 1 more sherlock holmes joke in her.

so, anyway, mulder is visibly uncomfortable around phoebe from the start, and this is something that scully picks up on immediately, even before being told any information about phoebe or her motives

and this is an ongoing theme from the very beginning, as mulder is generally unaggressive and compassionate to a fault, leaving scully feeling a responsibility to be conscious and wary of their surroundings.

scully isn't being jealous towards phoebe, just like she isn't "taking things personally" with diana. she understands this about mulder and how exploitable it is, and she's fiercely protective of both him and the kindhearted qualities that leave him vulnerable to these situations

anyway TLDR let me see any of you call either of them stupid again

[my-moony-and-padfoot]

All I want is you

~~ All I want for Christmas is youu ~~

Word count: 2 600

It's fluffy, it's just fluff. That's all there is. Well, a tiny little bit of angst but I mean, it needs to be there alright.

TW: There is some curse words but that about it, and like few mentions about past abuse but you won't even really notice it (two sentences, maybe)

“I want to kiss you on new years.” Sirius whispered, looking at Remus from where his head was laid on the pillows, and Remus had propped himself up on his elbow, looking back at him. He looked a little puzzled, but Sirius just smiled softly, reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind Remus' ear, though it only barely stayed there. “At midnight, watching the fireworks.”

“There's going to be people. Everyone who's spending Christmas here.” He said, but Sirius' smile didn't falter like it usually did when he was reminded about all the secrets, denied from doing things he desperately wanted, but couldn't. “People are going to find out.”

“Fuck the people.” He whispered with a grin, though it quickly turned back to the soft, sleepy smile he had been wearing for the past half an hour. “I don't care re. Not anymore. You're my boyfriend, and I want to spend new years with you, kiss you and be with you, and I should be allowed to do that without caring what other people think.” Remus blushed, ducking his head down for a moment, hiding it to Sirius' chest, making both of them laugh, though they tried to be quiet as James and Peter were sleeping.

“Are you sure?” Remus asked, turning serious again as he lifted his head up, looking at Sirius , trying to search his expression for any lie or nervousness, discomfort, unsureness, anything he could. But there was nothing he could detect, his smile looked sleepy, and soft, but confident at the same time. His eyes were clear, and happy looking, nothing was saying that something was wrong, everything seemed okay, so maybe it was.

“Yes. Remus, I'm sure.” He said, Remus smiled now, leaning down to give him a kiss. “Only if you want to, of course. If you're comfortable.”

“Anything you want, I want too.” He whispered, against his lips, pressing them down for another soft kiss before leaning back up, to look at Sirius. But he didn't understand why now, why did he want people to know now, why didn't he mind anymore. For so long he had been scared of his parents finding out, or the school, of something happening if people found out. “But… why now?” He asked after a moment, Sirius looked away momentarily, and he couldn't really tell what the expression meant that flashed on his face.

“It's not-.” He started, but trailed off as he looked back at Remus, the smile coming back once again. “I just don't care anymore. I don't care if people know, or my parents, I want them to. I want to be able to talk about you, to hold hands with you outside of our dorm or the empty common room. I don't want to lie anymore, it doesn't feel right.”

“Okay.” He whispered, nodding slightly. “Why on new years.”

“I wanna see James' face when he sees, or realizes, y'know, putting the pieces together.” He laughed, making Remus laugh quietly as well. “No, well, I do, but-” he said, pausing to lean up to give Remus a kiss. “It's new years, moony. I wanna kiss you at midnight, what's so bad about that?”

“Nothing.”

“Okay.” He whispered with that stupid dopey grin that made Remus' heart flutter, so he just smiled back. “It's Christmas tomorrow.” He said after a while, watching Remus' amber eyes, that looked so bright and soft in the candle lighting, it felt like he could look at them forever, get lost in them.

“Technically, it's Christmas now.” He said, glancing at the clock, it was almost two in the morning now, they should've been sleeping a long time ago.

“Smartass.” Sirius said, shoving him playfully, making him laugh and fall to the pillows next to Sirius, hoping they hadn't woken up their friends, though he didn't really care.

——

They slept in the next morning, though Sirius sneaked back into his bed before James and Peter got up. They had gone to the quidditch pitch to play for fun, he, James and Peter, and some other Gryffindors. They had done that for the past few years, going to play for fun on Christmas. Remus has stayed behind, it would be really cold to just sit in the stands and watch them. He didn't like being on a broom that much to actually play with them.

He glanced at the door when he heard it open, seeing Sirius walk in, and close the door behind himself. Remus focused back on writing, though smiling slightly to himself, he had just finished the sentence as he felt Sirius lean against him from the behind, wrapping his arms around Remus, head on his shoulder. “Watcha doing?”

“Writing a letter to mum.” He said, turning slightly to look at Sirius, giving him a chaste kiss before Sirius leaned back up, rounding the chair and hopping up on the desk. Remus smiled as he took a look at his boyfriend, he seemed to be in a good mood, he was smiling, and there was a small blush coating his cheeks that Remus was sure was from the shower he had just taken. His hair was still wet, and it was soaking the jumper he was wearing at the shoulders. “Have you ever thought about drying your hair?”

Sirius shook his head, as if on purpose getting rid of the water by shaking his head fast, quite like a dog would after a swim or a bath, Remus just smiled, quickly signing the letter and folding it up. “Wait there moons.” He said, getting down, and quickly walking over to his trunk, pulling something out and walking back over, hopping back on the desk. He handed Remus a gift that was wrapped in dark green wrapping paper, with way too much tape, it honestly looked like a child had wrapped it. But Remus liked it, at least he had tried.

“Did you wrap it yourself?” He asked with a small laugh, and Sirius just nodded. “Or did you hire a five-year-old to do it for you.”

Sirius rolled his eyes, though he smiled. “Open it.”

“Okay, okay.” He said, shaking his head, as he started to unwrap the gift, smiling as he saw what was inside. There was a bracelet, laying on top of a book. The bracelet had black and sage green beads on it, with a round charm on it, when he turned it over and looked closer, he saw that a constellation was carved on it. It was Sirius' constellation, he smiled at it.

“You don't actually have to wear it, I know you don't really wear jewelry, but-” he said a little nervously, running a hand through his hair, studying Remus' expression carefully. “But, I just thought you might like it. I found the charm from Hogsmeade one day, without the carving, did it with charms anyway, then I made that. I found the book there too, I hope you like it, or don't like have it yet.” He rambled on as Remus didn't answer, but kept studying the bracelet.

“You made this yourself?” He asked, amused as he looked up at Sirius. He smiled shyly, as he nodded.

“Do you like it?”

“Yeah. Yeah, I do, love it.” He whispered, glancing at the book, reading the cover. “Thank you, baby. And no, I don't have it yet, the book I mean.”

“Oh, good.” He sighed. “Can I put it on you?” He asked, again a little shyly, and Remus nodded, looking at him. Sirius smiled brightly, as Remus handed the bracelet to him before holding out his hand. Sirius opened it, carefully wrapping it around his wrist, closing it, and letting it fall in place.

“I'm never taking it off.” Sirius just grinned, leaning in to give him a kiss. “Close your eyes.” Remus said then. “I have a gift for you too.” He supplied when Sirius looked confused at his request, but then he nodded, closing his eyes, holding out his hands.

He reached for something in the drawer of the desk, placing it in Sirius' outstretched hands. He opened them as he felt weight there, smiling at the teddy bear he was now holding, it was holding a light pink heart, and Remus had slipped a bar of chocolate into its arms.

“Thank you, moons.” He whispered quietly, still looking at the teddy bear. “I love it.”

“I'm glad.” Remus smiled, happy that he hadn't gone utterly wrong with his gift. “I'm gonna take it away if you name it something stupid, though.” Sirius laughed, looking at him.

“It's moony.” He smiled after a moment of thinking, hopping down to go place it on his bed, Remus rolled his eyes, but smiled at him anyway. He tucked the chocolate bar in his pocket, picking up the pouch that held his chess pieces. “C'mon let's go, James wants to play chess, and you have to come see when he loses.” Remus nodded, getting up from the chair and following Sirius down to the common room. “His team lost in quidditch by the way, again. I don't think he should be captain anymore, I think I've proved myself so many Christmases in a row now that-”

“Remus, please don't tell me you actually believe that bullshit.” James asked, cutting Sirius off as they reached the common room, Remus just laughed, shaking his head as he took a seat on one of the sofas next to peter, starting to watch as Sirius and James started to set up a game of chess.

“I'm telling the truth.” Sirius grinned after a while, glancing at Remus as he put his pieces into place. “James is just too afraid to admit that I'd make a better captain than he does” James threw one of his chess pieces at Sirius, who set it on the side of the board, as if he had already won one from James.

——

It was a nice day. Remus liked spending Christmas with his friends, though they didn't even do anything special. He had watched Sirius and James play chess, but ended up reading a book, they had gone down to the great hall for Christmas dinner, then they had sneaked to the kitchens, settling by the fireplace with hot chocolate and marshmallows to roast.

“Can we do something tomorrow?” James asked, shuffling the deck of cards they had picked up to play some games before going to bed.

“Like what?” He asked, taking the cards he was dealt by James. “Don't look, you cheat.” He said, shoving Sirius out of the way when he leaned in to peek at his cards, he just laughed, taking his own cards as well.

“I don't know.” James said, nudging his glasses up as he looked down at his cards. “We could do something Christmassy.”

“Christmassy.”

“Shut up.” He said. “We could make snowballs chase everyone or maybe mistletoes, I don't know, I wanna do something fun.”

“It's not Christmas tomorrow, though, aren't you kinda late on this?” Peter said. “Maybe we do something on new years, let's give them a break.”

Sirius glanced at Remus, both starting to smile like they knew something the two didn't. “What?” James asked.

“Just thought about something funny.” Sirius said. “I'll tell you if you win.”

“Not fair. You always cheat.”

“I don't.”

—

After a few more rounds of games, Peter and James made their way up to bed, they stayed behind on the excuse of wanting to play more, and that they'd gather all their stuff before going to bed. Sirius gathered the cards, twisting the rubber band around that kept the deck together and set it down on the table, then he leaned against Remus' shoulder, looking into the slowly dying fire.

“I’ve never really liked Christmas.” Sirius whispered after a moment of silence. “It was never- fun y'know.”

“I know.” He said, rubbing Sirius' side for a moment, pulling him a little closer by his waist. “But, did you have fun today?”

“I did.”

“That's good, love.” He whispered, smiling slightly to himself as he leaned his head against Sirius'. “I did too.”

“You barely did anything.” Sirius laughed quietly. “You didn't even come to play with us.”

“You know that I don't play quidditch.”

“Well neither does lily, and she still came with us.” he said, turning to look at Remus. “And Frank, and peter and you know he's shit at playing, but he still came.”

“I'm pretty sure Lily came because of James.” he said, making Sirius roll his eyes. “And if Frank was playing, Alice must've been watching, no?”

“Well- yeah but it has nothing to do with you coming to play with us.”

“Have you considered that I can't stay on my broom for the life of me.” He said with a laugh, and Sirius laughed too, his head hitting Remus’ chest. “I'll come next year.” he whispered after a moment, playing with Sirius' hair before he looked back up.

“You said that last year.”

“Mm, maybe. But it was like freezing cold today. I'm not gonna freeze myself just to watch you guys play.”

“You said that last year too.” he said with a grin, and Remus just smiled. “If you'd play with us, you'd be warm.”

“I'm not playing, Sirius.”

“Fine.” he said, rolling his eyes, resting his head back on Remus' shoulder after a moment, it was quiet for a while.

“Should we go to bed?” Remus asked, and

Sirius nodded slightly, getting up from the floor, helping Remus up as well. “Are you going to your bed?”

“Yeah, I don't wanna wake up at seven just to sneak back into my bed.” Remus nodded, gathering their things from the table, watching as Sirius blew out the candle and offered his hand for Remus. He smiled, taking it and following Sirius up to their dorm. “Goodnight.” He whispered, taking both of Remus' hands into his when he had set the things down. “I love you.” He smiled, standing on his tiptoes to give him a kiss.

“Love you too.” He whispered with a soft smile. “Sleep well.” He said, kissing Sirius’ forehead before slipping into his bed, Sirius did the same, both getting under the covers and closing the curtains around their bed, though both let a small crack open, just so they could look at each other.

Remus fell asleep after a moment, feeling really tired even though he hadn't done much. Though he couldn't sleep that long before he was woken up, it was one of the curtains opening from his bed. He slowly opened his eyes, looking up at Sirius, who was standing next to his bed with a sheepish smile.

“What's up, love?” He asked quietly, propping himself up on his elbow before looking back at him.

“Couldn't sleep.” He whispered, playing with his fingers. “Can we cuddle?” Remus just nodded, laying back down and moving, so there would be space on the bed for Sirius as well. He climbed in next to him, closing the curtain before he laid down. He rested his head on Remus' chest, curling up to him, closing his eyes with a content sigh.

“Why couldn't you sleep?” he asked after a moment, starting to play with Sirius' hair.

“Couldn't sleep without you.”

“Okay.” He smiled, kissing his head. “What about tomorrow?”

“Don't care. Wanna be with you.” He mumbled, and Remus nodded again, pulling the blanket better over them both.

“I love you, baby. Sleep well.” He whispered, kissing his head again before laying back down against the pillows, closing his eyes.

“Love you too, moons.”

A/N:

Hi, hello :) Merry Christmas (if you celebrate)

I hope you're well, and that you liked this little Christmas fluff thingy.

I had so many Christmas things planned and under writing but then I just didn't write them, so have this. The other ones were a lot more angsty so I thought I'd be nice for Christmas and not write what I usually do. Hopefully you liked it anyway.

I've posted a fic three times this month?? That's so weird, I don't know what's gotten into me. Anyway this is probably the last fic of this year, so see you next year maybe?

Also,

Happy new years

Side note: I'm like hundred percent sure Sirius would be horrible at wrapping gifts, and you can't convince me otherwise.

Oh, also. If anything seemed, unhinged, it's because this is the product of me writing right before I fall asleep, or really early in the morning. So you're welcome I guess.

<3

[a-sip-of-milo]

Sorry for this vent, but I need to get this off my chest. This is gonna be really long.

To the 'narc abuse', 'borderline abuse', 'histrionic abuse' etc truthers:

I've had an incredible life, no trauma whatsoever. I've never known what a mental breakdown is, was top student throughout my school years. No bullies, no mean teachers, no abusive parents. Lived rich, won awards, never had a single problem in my life.

I was still a piece of shit.

I'm not empathetic whatsoever. I don't know how to comfort someone when they cry. I was severely detached with all my classmates I was so fucking insensitive. I throw fits of rage if things aren't as perfect as I visualised them. I always shift the blame to others, and if I'm held accountable, I don't know how to actually feel sorry when apologising, even until now. And I'm a neurotypical.

I don't mind being hated for this next part, it's perfectly understandable. TW for abusive & manipulative behaviour, scroll down until you see a #.

At 10, I called a classmate who was autistic and dyslexic "retarded" for not being able to write something despite knowing damn well they were disabled.

At 11, I verbally abused my 8 year old sister multiple times to the point of tears. I insisted (and believed) that she was just being oversensitive. This behaviour started long ago, this is when it reached its peak. It's still happening, but now she is mature enough to stand up to herself and I am mature enough to not be too harsh.

At 12, I gaslighted my then best friend into thinking she was the problem when we got involved in some drama I started. When she didn't take the fall for me, I ignored her for weeks. She started cutting, and I called her an attention seeker.

From then onwards, things just got worse. I stopped being a responsible child to my parents, frequently blamed my friends for anything that went wrong, and took advantage of my little sister's love for me.

And I did not have a single excuse. All I could say was 'I'm sorry', knowing that I'm lying. It's not that I saw my actions as 'okay', my heart just never ached like it was supposed to.

#

For those that scrolled to skip the triggering parts, I just want to say that I was a shitty person and had no excuse for it. I know that, as a child who had the best circumstances amongst her peers, there is nothing you can forgive about it.

I was, in a way, an abuser too. My friend who, at that time, had undiagnosed BPD, was still kinder than me. And before you anti-pd mfers start attacking me, I wanna tell you loud and clear:

No NPD, no BPD, no HPD, no DID, no BS.

I was an abuser.

I'm a neurotypical.

Sorry this took me so long to get to. I really appreciate and admire your honestly, and I hope that you've taken the steps to better yourself since then. I also hope that these people have found peace.

Thank you for your ask <3

[imekitty]

What do you think of Danny and Jazz’s relationship in the show? Is there anything about it you would change?

I enjoy their relationship from a story/character/plot perspective, but I don't think Jazz is a great sister or anything. For one, she's downright mean to him in the first few episodes. Like the very first episode, she directly tells him their parents don't want him (calls him an "abused, unwanted wretch" lol) and then Maddie right after that remarks that Jazz never offers to drive Danny to school, like was she just embarrassed to be seen with Danny at that time? Or did she just not want to hang out with him in the morning? Like it's clear that she's not driving Danny to school this particular morning because she actually cares about him, it's because she's trying to make a point to her parents, basically telling them to their faces that they're bad parents and she could do a better job caring for Danny because she's read psychology books.

And then later when Dash invites her to his party, she says she'll go only if he also invites Danny and Danny is VERY excited about it and then she just suddenly decides "nah I'm not going," knowing full well how excited Danny was about getting invited and knowing that Dash might not put up with Danny without her also there. And she gives no reason for not going to the party, just says she doesn't care ("not caring!") when Danny freaks out about her not joining him. Like she could've told him "hey, you know, they're not really your friends, you don't need to go to this party and wear these clothes to try to be something you're not," but no, she just says she's not going and then ditches him with no regard for his feelings.

In the beginning, Jazz is actually pretty stuck-up and kind of bitchy. But then everything changes in My Brother's Keeper when she learns that Danny's a ghost hybrid and suddenly she DOES care about him for real and she supposedly loves him so much and just wants to help him and it's like...why didn't she care about him before?

Anyway, her personality changes a lot after that, she goes from being cold and stuck-up to goofy and clumsy, more like her dad. Which is fine, I like Jazz's goofiness. But it's just weird watching the first few episodes and seeing her be so mean to Danny. And then later it's actually Danny who is mean to her, like they just switch, suddenly Jazz is the sibling that embarrasses Danny.

But despite the switch, she still isn't a great sister. She gets really overbearing, she doesn't always believe or trust Danny, she uses his computer without permission even though it's password-protected, and she's quick to impose her psychoanalyses on him. Now that's not to say that Danny is a great brother, but he at least doesn't pretend to be. Jazz seems to think she's always right and gets frustrated when Danny just won't agree or do what she wants to the point that she'll try to force her solution on him.

So I would say I think their relationship is enjoyable to write, I think there's a lot of subtext and complexities that I like exploring in fanfics. I would maybe change Jazz's interactions with Danny in the early episodes to match how she treats him later, but other than that, I don't think there's anything in particular I would change. I'm perfectly happy with toxic/unhealthy relationships in fiction because they make a great foundation for angst. And there's a lot of angst that can be built on the Danny x Jazz relationship.