#just take the previous person's tags its not that a big an issue

[kenzakikazuma]

respectfully as someone who's been here forever none of these are bad things LOL

[pastadoughie]

many people were confused about some of my previous posts, so for the sake of clarity i am condensing everything! tumblr has extremely transphobic moderation practices, often flagging completely innocent posts as explicit, solely for containing trans women in them or mentioning transgenderism. while letting untagged porn in sfw tags (ive literally seen porn tagged as "sfw agere") and blatent hatespeech, especially twards trans people (just look at the "gender critical" tag) go completely unchecked recently the CEO of tumblr had a big public hissyfit about people (rightfully) calling him transmysogenistic, going into random trans womens dms to harrass them, and saying that predstrogen saying she "hopes he explodes with hammers and then explodes again and hammers fly everywhere" is a death threat and saying he is calling the FBI on her (repeatedly misgendering her and calling her "it") and many bloggers, apon speaking out about it or even making harmless jokes (one trans woman posted a picture of a car and a hammer with the caption "reblog to scare matt" and got nuked for it) and many are very very angry (rightfully) about this whole affair and tumblr in general. if you would like to look into it i reccomend scrolling the "predstrogen" tag as she is the case most people are talking about at the moment. So, what can we do? this is clearly an ongoing issue, and, dispite having lost a lawsuit about their transphobic moderation in the past (see : https://www.documentcloud.org/documents/21274288-tumblr-nycchr-settlement) its clearly not gonna stop with just user complaints, as staff members are perfectly content to just go scorched earth on users who even so much as lightly poke fun at them well if you want to help you should contact the human rights commision (i will give clear details further down) ! you dont have to be in the US, nor be an adult to file, and it only takes a few minutes. this is the best and most effective method to fix this, because it hits tumblr where it hurts. human rights acencies have a lot of legal and financial power and tumblr CAN NOT just ignore them, and given that this will be the seccond time this is happening, the commisions shouldnt be playing nice anymore eaither. its really important that AS MANY PEOPLE AS POSSIBLE FILE, and with different examples! while maybe your case might not be enough to prop up a lawsuit on its own, we need to prove a general trend. so every little bit counts! to respond to another question abt this ive gotten, as for what exactly to report, you should a) write about an act of discrimination youve recieved on tumblr that was eaither administered by a staff member OR that staff refused to give adequate moderation action in for example : a terf posted some blatent hatespeech targeted twards you, and you reported them, and staff looked at the issue and refused to persecute it. example 2 : you were unfairly flagged, deleted, or otherwise punished by a staff member and you are queer ( AND the post they banned you for has some kind of tie to your gender, ex : a sfw transition progress photo ) OR b) if you have not personally recieved something like that, please look for other peoples stories (THEY SHOULDNT BE HARD TO FIND, within the last couple of hours trans people have been being banned LEFT AND RIGHT for trying to speak on this. i would reccomend checking some of the tags related to what happened with predstrogen) and you should describe that incident as best as possible (be sure to disclose that you are speaking for someone else, ideally you should tell the story of someone you know, if possible.) you can also mention any reports you have made twards people posting blatent hatespeech that, opon reveiwing tumblr refused to prosecute dispite it being very obviously against terms of service. just so nobody gets confused about the filing process, im laying it out in more plain languadge!!

first you should email the SF HRC (san francisco human rights commision), at hrc.info@sfgov.org and say something along these lines :

Hello, I am [full name] from [country or state] and I am filing a complaint against Tumblr, witch is owned by the parent company Automattic Inc. located at 60 29th St, San Francisco, CA 94110.

Tumblr has had previous issues with the NYC DHR for their moderation being unfairly biased against trans women (see : https://www.documentcloud.org/documents/21274288-tumblr-nycchr-settlement).

Despite a legally binding agreement with the NYC DHR, staff members still regularly harrass users based on their gender or sexual orientations. For example : on [date of most recent infraction] [describe incident] (if you are describing an incident that did not happen to you specifically, say something like) This incident involves the user [username] who I am not affiliated with (or/) who I am filing on behalf of.

I can be reached for further inquiries about this incident at [email you want to talk over] or [phone number you want to talk over]. (if you would like to be anonymous) However, In the event of legal prosecution against Automattic I would refer to be kept anonymous, where possible, in court proceedings. alternatively, you can also call the SF HRC at : 415-252-2500, you can use the above text as a starting point for this as well, next you want to fill out the form for the NYC DHR (new york city department of human rights) here : https://www.nyc.gov/site/cchr/about/report-discrimination.page for company you wanna put : Automattic and/or Tumblr for address you wanna put : 770 Broadway, New York, NY 10003 for phone number you wanna put : (646) 513-4321 and for category of discrimination you can put : Discriminatory harassment and basis of discrimination you can put : Gender; Gender identity you can then use a similar script on the written section of the form. when describing a specific incident, you should attach as many screenshots and links as possible! (for links, include both a live link and an archival link, so take a capture with the internet archive and have that as an alternative, incase a staff member gets petty.) this should only take a few minutes at most, and it helps alot! you can fill this out if you are a minor, and you dont have to be a us resident, please please take the time!!! and, just to clarify because there are many posts going around that are confused about this tumblr moved offices to san francisco recently, so their main HQ is at : 60 29th St, San Francisco, CA 94110 they DO still have an office in new york city, and thats where their PREVIOUS HQ was, the address is : 770 Broadway, New York, NY 10003

[just-my-latest-hyperfixation]

Another celebration ficlet request! The original ask for this one seems to have gotten deleted, and it was sent on anon, so I can't even tag the person who sent it in. 😫

I hope you still see this and enjoy, nonnie! 💖

Heaven's in the backseat

Rated: E

Words: 1,000

Tags: Mafia AU; Hitman Eddie Munson; Mob boss Dick Harrington; Mentions of Stommy; Knife play; Dubious consent; Obsessive behavior; Violent thoughts; Car sex; Eddie has anger management issues and Steve is a little slut

Notes: Previous part | Part 1

Eddie has just lit his first cigarette of the night when one of the waiters informs him that Mr. Harrington wants him outside. As he grinds the cigarette under his boot, he imagines doing the same thing to Dick’s stupid head. 

Working for a mob boss is so goddamn exhausting. 

A week where Eddie doesn't come close to kicking the proverbial bucket is a good week - especially now that Dick has been taking him along as a bodyguard more and more often. He’s not complaining about that, though. Occupational hazard. 

No, what’s really annoying is the damn black tie affairs. As if squeezing into a fucking suit wasn't enough, the social dynamics of the underworld are mind-numbingly complicated. All of the big mob families are either related or out to kill each other - more often than not both at the same time. It makes events such as this an interesting affair, to say the least. All night long, Eddie has been hovering at the edge of the room while the boss ate and drank and shook hands with other important farts. Always vigilant, always ready to pull his knife from its holster under his suit jacket. And now he can’t even step out for ten minutes to have a fucking smoke? 

The car is parked in the driveway when he arrives. Next to it are the boss himself and a swaying figure with disheveled chestnut hair wearing a rumpled suit. 

Eddie’s blood bubbles and his steps speed up.

“-fucking disgrace,” Harrington says just as he flies down the stairway leading to the car. “You’ll do anything for attention, won’t you?” 

Eddie doesn’t catch the slurred reply, but it must’ve been the wrong one, because Harrington slaps the boy across the face before wrestling him into the backseat. Eddie’s hand is already on the knife when the asshole turns. For a heartbeat, he revels in the temptation of lodging the blade right in the middle of that ugly face, but he reigns himself in. Too much security, too many witnesses. 

“My son is drunk,” Harrington says. “Drive him home.” 

Before Eddie has a chance to reply, he has stalked past him and back into the venue.

*

“What the hell took you so long?” 

Eddie casts a look into the rearview mirror to see the venue disappearing behind them and Steve straightening up in his seat. His voice is still slightly slurred, his eyes a bit unfocused - but he's nowhere near as drunk as he appeared seconds ago. Eddie's mouth tugs into a grin. 

“What, I don't get a thank you for driving you? Where are your manners, little nymph?” 

“Why should I thank you for doing your literal job?” Steve’s mirror image scoffs at him. His bottom lip is pink and a little puffy where his father slapped him. “And don't call me that.” 

“I'm a bodyguard, not a chauffeur,” Eddie says. “There's a difference, y’know?” 

“You're a dog,” Steve drawls. “You do whatever my dad tells you to.” 

Eddie’s hands tighten around the steering wheel. Steve’s mouth curls at the edges, but his eyes stay bored. 

“How about you?” Eddie asks, once he has blinked the crimson shadows from his vision. “What did you do to incur his wrath? Must’ve been pretty bad, if you feigned being so wasted he’d send you home like some misbehaving child.” 

“None of your business, is it?” Steve snaps. Then, after a second or two, the aloof facade slips back on and he shrugs. “He caught me in the bathroom with Hagan.” 

Something slithers low in Eddie’s gut, dangerous and deadly like a coil of venomous snakes. 

“What? That ugly, freckled fuckface? C’mon, you can do better than that.” 

Steve laughs, a sound like the edge of a knife - bright and pretty and sharp-edged. “Why do you care? You don’t own me. What is it to you if Tommy fucking Hagan shoves his cock up my-” 

He doesn’t get any further than that. Eddie pulls over to the side of the road and slams on the brakes. One fluid motion later, he has scaled the middle console and has Steve pinned on the backseat, wrists trapped over his head in a one-handed vice grip. 

“Oh, honey,” he murmurs, voice low and lethal. “But this is where you’re wrong, see? You are mine. And one of these days, I’m gonna make sure everyone knows it.” 

Those pretty eyes go wide as he slides the knife from its holster. The blade gleams, catching what little light there is in the dark car. With one flick of his wrist, he slices away the top button of Steve’s expensive shirt, revealing the long, graceful line of that neck. Steve exhales a shaky breath and his throat bops with it. 

“One of these days,” Eddie murmurs, trailing the tip of the blade over tan skin, leaving just the thinnest of red lines. “I’m gonna kill everyone who ever looked at you or touched you wrong and claim you as mine. Stuff you so full of my cock you forget about everyone else, until the only word you remember is my name. Carve my initials into that pretty skin of yours so nobody ever forgets who you belong to.” 

Steve looks up at him, eyes bright and hazy, and a little whimper falls from his perfect lips. He writhes deliciously in Eddie’s hold, and for a moment, Eddie thinks he’s scared, that he’s gonna plead for mercy. 

But then he slots his leg between Steve’s thighs to hold him in place and he feels it. He looks down at the boy in awed surprise and can’t help the grin that creeps over his face.

When Steve speaks, his voice is hoarse and breathy, but not from fear. 

“Do it, then,” he challenges, rolling his hips and grinding his hard cock against Eddie’s thigh. His lips strain to meet Eddie’s, breath warm and wet against his skin.  “Make me yours.” 

Eddie has never been so happy to obey in his life. 

Part 5

More celebration ficlets

[darklydeliciousdesires]

Light on the Darkside - Chapter Fourteen.

Huge love to my little audience for your continued reads, reviews and reblogs. You're so lovely <3

Previous chapters - One Two Three Four Five Six Seven Eight Nine Ten Eleven Twelve Thirteen

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed.

Words - 3,794

Warnings - 18+ throughout. Topics cover depression, suicide and eating disorders. Minors DNI!

After a thirty-five-minute train journey from Nuneaton to Leamington Spa, followed by a half-hour bus ride, Ella found herself walking through the picturesque village of Moreton Morrell in the heart of the Warwickshire countryside.  

It was the first time in weeks that she’d spent any time away from James, apart from a few job interviews she’d attended, plus their respective therapy sessions, all but moving in with him completely. He hadn’t officially asked her, but welcomed it greatly, more of her belongings arriving at the flat over the eight weeks they’d been reunited, both blissful in the fledgling stages of their relationship, now able to flourish in the real world.   

That particular morning, she was on her way to visit another person she had met while at the same place she’d found her love, turning off Duffus Hill onto a small cul-de-sac, arriving at the second cottage along and rapping the heavy iron door knocker a couple of times.  

“You’re here!” 

Stepping in, she was pulled into a huge hug by Andrea, the young women thrilled to see one another again. “Aww, look at you! You look amazing, Ella!” 

“Thanks! As do you. Wow, your hair!”  

Andrea had added colour to her natural mane of fiery auburn, making the hue even more intense. “I was so glad to sit in a salon chair again and get it fixed!” Ella could identify. Walking into the abode, she was struck by how sumptuously cosy it was, the fire lit to keep the October chill at bay, a large, grandfather clock with its heavy pendulum swinging back and forth in the corner, and an album by Portishead playing softly.  

“Tea?” 

“Please, that’d be mint. I could murder a cup!” Ella confirmed, hanging up her coat on the rack and sliding her boots off. “It’s getting so cold out there. I think we’re in for a shitting horrible winter, innit.” 

Her friend raised an eyebrow. “Now, who’s dulcet tones do what you’ve just said remind me of?” she pondered, Ella shielding her face with her hand momentarily, laughing. “How is he?” 

“He’s really, really good,” she confirmed, Andrea moving into the beautiful little kitchen and clicking the kettle on. “He’s at therapy today over in Birmingham, still sees the same guy who was the head clinician at the unit he transferred to as a private patient.” 

Andrea placed some teabags into the pot before pulling two large mugs from the cupboard. “That surprises me, I have to say. I always had James down as the type to walk away from it all and give the ole’ line of ‘suck my fucking dick’ to any further therapy once he was released. I’m glad he’s benefitting from it.” 

How well she knew him. “I did too for a while, but being at the place in Edgbaston really changed his mind about it all. His therapist sounds lovely, really listens to him and guides him over what he needs to do. He didn’t respond well to Dr. Beaumont’s methods of like, pointing you in the general direction and letting you figure it out for yourself.” 

Her eyes widened a fraction. “Hmm. She was very allusive like that, wasn’t she?” Noticing Ella pull her cigarettes out, she pointed at the back door, taking one from her with thanks. “She definitely wasn’t for everyone.” 

For Andrea, though, she’d been wonderful in connecting the dots between a traumatic event and her subsequent sex addiction issues, the girls discussing it after smoking their cigarettes, moving to the big, comfortable leather Chesterfield in the lounge.  

“I think the further I understand that it was less about sex and desire itself and more thriving on the attention from men and the excitement of sleeping around, the more it’s helped me reconcile the trauma that sparked it,” she explained, sipping her tea as she took a biscuit from the tin between them. It was lovely to witness Ella taking one without prompting, she noted. “I didn’t deal with it all, when it happened. Shoved it away. It was too painful.” 

“Sweetie,” Ella cooed, reached to stroke her cheek affectionately. “Of course, it was. It was no age, losing your parents at twenty-one. That’s like, one of the worst things I can imagine.” 

Indeed, the death of her mum and dad three years before had turned Andrea’s entire life upside down. Being an only child, it had been made even more difficult. Of course, she’d had family rallying around to help her, her uncles and aunties making sure she was okay regularly. Being alone in the cottage, though, she had soon come to realise that she truly wasn’t, sparking her promiscuous and often dangerous behaviour, leading to a breakdown and subsequent sectioning.  

It was too much for any twenty-four-year-old woman to deal with, losing her parents to a fatal car crash, being catapulted into a life of sole financial comfort, since they were both very well off, but having nobody around all the time to either enjoy it with – or more pertinently – keep a watchful eye on her.  

Life after treatment, she was now very glad to say, was much, much improved. 

“So, how’s that sexy mate of James’s, then? Steve, isn’t it?” she asked, smiling with a little embarrassment. “I can’t believe I straddled the man and stuck my tongue down his throat. The shame!” 

Ella snorted softly with a smirk. “Steve wouldn’t have cared at all, trust me. Quite the opposite!” 

“Oh, I know. I could tell that by how he kissed me back,” she revealed, her cringe fading a little. “He was a very good kisser, so that makes the embarrassment that I couldn’t dial my compulsions back a little less mortifying!” 

“As for how he is, he’s fine. Keeps asking for your number,” Ella revealed, watching Andrea rub a hand down her face. “Sorry, shouldn’t I have mentioned that?” 

“No, you’re fine, sweet. It’s tricky because I fancy him, but yeah, that time I briefly met him he was nothing more than a compulsion trigger, so I don’t know. He’s a young, sexy as fuck guy. He likely won’t want to get wrapped up in my mess that I can’t really casually date somebody and enjoy carefree sex, lest triggering my issues. I sort of get the impression that’s what he’s about.” 

Oh, how right she was. “Yeah, he’s a man whore, Ands. Big time. I mean like, he’s fucking lovely, such a laugh and totally cool, but he shags around a lot.” Hester, a girl called Jennie, another she didn’t know the name of, someone called Leonie, the man had his rotation in place.  

“Bollocks,” she huffed, Ella spraying a mouthful of biscuit crumbs. “I guess I’ll settle for just looking at him and how bloody pretty he is when I finally come to see you up your way.” 

All talk of the male species was left there, the friends instead catching up with one another’s lives on the outside. Andrea revealed she’d gotten herself a part-time job at the local pub, The Black Horse, although truly she didn’t need to work with a fully paid off mortgage and all she had in savings gathering a very liveable amount in interest. 

 Still, what she wouldn’t give for her parents returned to her instead. She still cursed that the drunk driver who’d collided head on with their car had survived, albeit in a vegetative state. Perhaps that was the more fitting punishment, though. While they talked, Ella also shared a few of her plans, too, like returning to college.  

“I like, kind of think it makes me a fraud, though, wanting to strive for a career in helping others when I know I’m not one hundred percent recovered yet,” she began, sipping on a fresh cup of tea. She’d been tentatively considering it, perhaps studying for a psychology degree, wanting to specialise and help patients with eating disorders.  

Sighing, she continued. “We went out for a curry not long after James and I reconnected, and it sent me into a spiral. It was pants, mate, sitting there crying outside because I couldn’t cope with eating in an unfamiliar place. Or choosing a food I wouldn’t normally have had.” 

Andrea was thoughtful for a few moments before replying. “Did you ever think that the studies could actually help you more in your recovery? It might give you a greater insight, learning from the other side of the coin, as it were.” 

She hadn’t, it had to be said. After arriving home that evening, she discussed it more with James while she cooked chicken, him supervising the rice as she was – by her own admission – bleedin' useless with it. 

“Andrea is right,” he spoke, jumping up to sit on the counter. “You probably would get a new perspective over it. As for thinking that makes you a fraud and all of that, nah babe. Look at it this way, before your degree, you need to take your A levels first, so that’s two years. All being well, you’ll have finished that degree by twenty-eight, so that’s just over five years into your recovery, innit. You’ll be way more secure in yourself by then, won’t you?” 

“Mm,” she hummed, sighing. “I hate that my illness took such a chunk of my life, time when I should have been making these decisions and studying. I would have been a year away from completion of a degree, if I hadn’t. I messed up big time.” 

“Oi, less of that. That’s my girlfriend you’re badmouthing, dickhead,” he frowned, stretching his legs out to ensnare her, pulling her back into a full body hug. “If you hadn’t gotten ill, then you wouldn’t have decided that this was what you wanted to do, would you? Or met me. Obviously, I’m the more important of the two there.”  

His joke had her laughing, squeezing him tight and kissing his chest. “Of course, baby.” Reaching for her cider, she took a swig, lifting her head to give him a little nibble beneath his jaw before moving back to the cooker. “How was therapy, then?” 

“Yeah, pretty good, you know. We discussed my ongoing anger issues today. Michael made a good suggestion over what I could do to stop it, my desire to batter people who piss me off at the drop of a hat.”  

He’d been doing very well there, up until a week ago while at a club with Ella and a few others. Now much more confident in her body, she had been up on a podium dancing, wearing only a small outfit of hotpants and a cropped top, attracting a lot of male attention. Looking was fine, but when some random bloke had taken it upon himself to climb the side of the podium and make a grab for her, well. He’d met a very irate James, dragging him down by his jeans, his fist meeting his face at speed.  

“What did he suggest?” she asked, cracking fresh pepper over the chicken and turning each butterflied breast, moving to the chopping board to prep the vegetables to go into the wok.  

“Kickboxing. He said it would give me both an outlet for rage, and discipline over when to exert that rage and all that. Think I’m gonna give it a go, innit.” 

She widened her eyes. “War does not need to be any more deadly than he already is!” Her laughter filled the room, even more so at her boyfriend’s entertained smirk. “I think it’s a good idea, really. He seems to have a lot of those, Michael.” 

“Yeah, he’s a top grade bloke. Really fucking sound. Always has an answer for all my stuff, too. So what else is new with Andrea, then?” 

“Oh, the redheaded goddess!” Steve called from the armchair, beginning to grin. “Is she ready for me to give her one hell of a good seeing to yet?” 

“Calm your dick down,” Ella warned, pointing at him with a spatula, “you’ll do her recovery no bleedin’ good.”  

“We’re gonna have to put him in restraints when she comes up for your birthday,  innit?” James spoke, pulling a fresh beer from the fridge.  

Steve turned, his grin wide. “Nah, don’t you threaten me with a good time, Jim!”  

Once dinner had been eaten, a film watched and Steve declaring he was ‘off to play with Leonie for the night’ before leaving the flat, it wasn’t long before they decided to have a good time of their own.  

“Mmm, shit. I don’t even know how the hell you can move your tongue so quickly, but I... ahhh! I’m not complaining!” she moaned, feeling him smile against her as she straddled his head, James happily lying there with her riding his mouth.  

It burned incandescent through her, like a hail of glimmers creeping slow, his hands clutching the rounds of her bum, moving every so often to lay a hard smack. She’d never had a man spank her before, but god, how she enjoyed it when James did. He wasn’t gentle with it. At all.  

While his hands showed no mercy, his tongue slowed, dragging flat and slow through her folds, circling over her clit and repeating the action again. Her thighs shook from the potency of each lick, shuddered breaths leaving her mouth as she panted hard, her gaze falling to see him open his eyes and wink at her.  

Wrapping her clit in a firm suck, the sensation rooted itself in her, sharp-toothed and edging on a little too much, her hips swaying against his mouth. The pleasure dug deep into her marrow as she cried out, the release snapping through her, Ella immediately moving to gratify him by sheathing his cock within her still fluttering walls.  

He weighed heavy in the depths of her, the feeling of her soaking him only gratified further by the prickle of teeth crushing his nipple, her nails grazing like sensual daggers down his sides. She pulled heaven from the very depths of his hell every time he was inside her, not afraid to be as rough with him as he liked her to be, her hand grasping his neck, nails digging in as she kissed him with stormy lust.  

She sucked his tongue, his mouth then gliding to rain soft bites over her neck, grasping her bum and fucking up into her powerfully, the tempo remaining slow burning like napalm. Sitting back up again, his cock pressed firmly as she rotated her hips, hitting her front wall, lightning rolling over her spine, clawing at the black and grey brandings of his upper arms as he reached to squeeze her breasts.  

God, how she loved him, thrived on the thrill of having sex with him, James the sole reignition to her desires as soon as she’d started to feel better. The way he looked at her too, it made her feel incredible about herself, her body confidence restored. She couldn’t thank him enough for having such a part in returning that to her. There were wobbles on occasion, but they were becoming fewer and further between. 

Watching as she fucked him, she’d never seen a sight as sexy, her tall, muscular, tattooed man with his storm grey eyes. He was so darkly alluring, so stunningly sexy, James’s thoughts over her extremely similar. He loved that she finally saw what he did in her, and enjoyed her body as much as he did for the most part. 

The way she moved on top of him had him lost to the sublimity of it, no girl before her doing quite such a thorough job where he’d be content to remain on his back for the duration. It was hypnotic, a rhythmic spell of sexual energy unlike anything he’d ever experienced, her body rolling and undulating like she was made of liquid. Quite simply, he’d never been ridden like that in his whole life. She absolutely blew his mind, this beautiful young woman who he fallen so deeply in love with.  

The pace became more urgent and frenzied, voracity replacing the slower, sumptuous enjoyment that had prevailed thus far, Ella grinding down on him eagerly as he moved beneath her with more purpose, both of them driving deeper moans from one another.   

Each keen undulation caused him to feel sparks flickering his spine, while she had her own bliss pulsing softly, increasing more the faster she moved, fervidly chasing her release as she began to rub her clit, her other hand flexing at his chest, nails digging in.  

A string of panted expletives left her mouth as she felt herself reach boiling point, bubbling over and taking him with her to a gloriously sweet finish, intensity throbbing hard and leaving them both a breathless, shuddering wreck.   

With Ella now taking the contraceptive pill, there was no longer a need to move immediately to dispose of a condom, James pulling her down against his chest, stroking her back as he kissed her deeply. Floaty light little aftershocks skipped over her nerves as her release ebbed away slowly, feeling his cock twitching within the hug of her walls.  

Sleepiness began to settle over her, Ella finally moving to her side of the bed and pulling the duvet and thick, faux fur blanket over them, blocking out the November chill from their bare flesh as he curled around her.  

“Night, babe.” Dropping a kiss upon her shoulder, his arm tightened around her as his head sank into the pillows beneath it. “Love you.” 

“Love you too, my sexy church burner.”  

Yes, it still made him laugh.  

The following morning, Ella rose first, pulling on one of James’s long-sleeved t shirts (this one depicting the logo for the band Venom, who she was becoming a little partial to) her big, slouchy socks as well as her pyjama bottoms, shivering a little as she waited for the heating to come on while making herself a tea.  

Looking over into the lounge area, she noticed a familiar sight, a blanket swathed Snedders lying asleep on the sofa. He had his own key, so it wasn’t a surprise to sometimes find him there of a morning unexpectedly. She guessed there’d be a story to accompany his presence, probably involving his on/off girlfriend, the infamous Kerry. Ella didn’t like her at all, finding her to be very difficult to get along with.  

Making her tea, she moved to the armchair, placing her mug down on the much neater coffee table. In lieu of being able to offer anything towards the rent (which James had dismissively snorted at the suggestion of anyway) she’d taken it upon herself to keep the dwelling tidier and cleaner, padding to the corner where the answering machine light flashed.  

Turning the volume down low so as not to wake Snedders, she pressed play, being informed of three new messages.  

“Hi sis! I need to meet you at half four this afternoon so don’t get there too early. My shifts, the way they’re moving them around, fucks sake! I know it’s only half an hour, but yeah. See you later!”  

Jane, a welcome message.  

“James, it’s only me. Dad and I would love to see you. Are you free to come to lunch at ours next Saturday? Let me know, love.” 

Carole, perhaps not so welcome, depending on her mood. She’d sounded jovial enough, though.  

“Hello, message for Ella Greenhall. This is Sharon calling from Bloomin’ Lovely about your interview. I’m pleased to say we’ve chosen you for the position, if you could call me back at the shop as soon as possible, that would be lovely. Tentatively, I’d like you to start next Monday. Looking forward to hearing from you soon!” 

“Oh my god!” she squeaked, jumping up and down as quietly as she could, clasping her hands over her mouth. “I bleedin’ got it!!”  

Out of all the jobs she’d recently been applying for, the position at the florist just off the high street there in Nuneaton was the one she’d coveted most, Sharon, the owner making her feel so welcome when she’d arrived, the atmosphere so warm and lovely. It was only a part-time position, but with her wanting to start at college again it was perfect for her, Ella able to work in the college hours around her new job.  

When James got up around an hour later, her news brought him booming delight, much less concerned with waking up the sleeping heap of ginger dreadlocks on the sofa than she was. 

“Babe, that’s top grade! I’m so fucking proud of you!” he exclaimed, swinging her around in his arms, a grunt coming from the sofa. 

“Aw, ya got a job, Ells?” Snedders grumbled, emerging from within the swathe of the large blanket. “Nice one, little mate.”  

“Cheers, Sneds,” she chimed, turning then to her boyfriend after he put her down once more. “Also, your mum left a message. Asked if you were free for lunch next Saturday.” 

“Hmm,” he hummed, his jaw setting slightly. “Since that’s your birthday, I’m saying no. Even if it wasn’t, I’d still be saying no.” 

“Well, we’re not doing anything until the evening, are we?” 

He smirked, side eyeing her with raised eyebrows. “I had planned to bounce you on my dick for most of the afternoon.” Pausing, he began to laugh at the lascivious look she returned. “Hold on, did she say anything about you going, too?” 

“Not specifically,” she shrugged, reaching for her cigarettes.  

That was about right for Carole. She knew all about Ella, too, James already having introduced her to his dad, Alan thinking she was ‘absolutely bloody lovely, kidda’ as the man himself had worded it. “Then I definitely ain’t going.”  

“Maybe she meant me too, but just didn’t say it?” she suggested, watching his lips tightening. Perhaps it was best to leave it there, she thought, knowing well now the clear signs of him becoming agitated. “Then again like, maybe she didn’t. You’re not obliged to call her back if you don’t want to, baby.” 

He relaxed then, slipping an arm around her. “Good, because I’m not.”  

As it turned out, though, the lack of return phone call led to Carole reaching out to her son again, James answering the phone to her a few hours later.  

“Does that invite extend to Ella?” he asked, frowning.  

“Of course, it does!” she exclaimed, busying herself with cleaning the kitchen while she jammed the cordless phone between her ear and shoulder. “I’d like to meet this girl your father has told me all about.”  

Even though she was being polite and casual, agreeing to visiting still went against his better judgement. Come the following Saturday, he’d see in hindsight how correct his intuition had been, too. 

[into-crazy]

Derry’s Secret Pt. 2

Pennywise x Female Reader series

Warnings- mature language, stalking, violence, dark themes, consumption of alcohol, ages 18+

Other parts can be found RIGHT HERE and through the "Derry's Secret" tag🎈

You live in a little corner house on the end of a quiet street. Using the term quiet because that's how it usually was. The neighbors kept to themselves mostly, which you didn't mind. Much preferring the seclusion anyways, as you have always been a bit more reserved.

The house you reside in has a time-worn appearance on the outside. Exactly like many of the other homes in the area, only yours is smaller. Even the interior is dated, from the tiled floors to the walls. Strangely, you appreciated the look and feel of it though. Plus the previous appliances seemed to have been properly replaced right before you'd moved in, so there were no issues there. Sure, they weren’t brand spanking new, but they were fully functional.

Your landlord was a sweet old woman. She rented the house to you monthly for a great price. The rent was low, almost too low that it was questionable. And rather suspicious. You had curiously asked her the reason for such a discounted amount. To which she simply replied, "The house is old, I wouldn't feel comfortable renting it for so much. And you seem like a sweet girl." You weren't entirely sure what she meant with that last statement, however you happily took it as a compliment.

Approaching the porch steps, your phone starts to vibrate in your pocket. You take it out, checking the notification. It's a text from Gabby that read- 'On my way. Be there in a few.'

You head inside, kicking your shoes off at the entryway before tossing the bags onto the couch. Satisfied to finally be in the familiar comfort of your own residence. You bring the grocery tote into the kitchen and put the contents away. It was only a few, non-perishable food items. Done with that, you connect your phone to the charger and set it atop the counter.

After today's events, you wanted nothing more than to lay around, have a drink, and relax with your friend.

Deciding to change, you remove your clothes while heading into the bedroom. You grab an oversized tee from the drawer and head towards the hamper at the end of the hallway. Having thrown your sweaty, asphalt dusted garments in, you exhale putting the fresh tee on.

"Much better." You whisper, pulling on a clean pair of shorts.

Since Gabby texted that she was almost here, you'll just sit and wait for her to arrive. Having purposely left the door unlocked so she could come right on in.

Walking back into the living room, you instantly spot something tall standing in the corner. Startled, you dare not to take another step. Instead choosing to fearfully eye the strange figure in your home.

There, stood a clown in a white puffy costume. Well over six feet tall, with elongated limbs. A large head that's twice, maybe three times the size of an average person's head. Its hair is orange and styled to curve upwards. Complete with makeup- a pale white face, thin highly arched eyebrows, and red lips with two lines curving up, ending in points directly above its big blue eyes.

Your legs are locked tight, you wouldn't be able to move even if you wanted to. Acknowledging this, the clown grinned, flashing a buck toothed smile.

"Hiya," its high pitched greet came out.

Despite its eyes shifting slightly away from each other, you could feel it staring dead at you. Swallowing hard, it doesn't take you long to figure whom the looming figure might be. "You're the t-thing from the drain," you faintly shudder out.

It lets out a delighted chuckle in response. "Ahh, you remember."

There's something about the deep husk in its voice that gives off the impression that it might be a male.

"Who are you?" You ask, finally able to take a step back.

It mimics your action, but taking one closer to you. The scent of burnt popcorn fills your nostrils. It's not something you would have expect this thing to smell like. Not this terrifying creature.

"I am Pennywise the Dancing Clown!" He jingles, giving a graceful bow upon introducing himself. "Or Very wise," he rises, "as you might know from what the little offspring told you." He laughs mockingly at the previous mention.

This is when you realize that he never fled. He followed you when you went to drop off the young child and now he's followed you home! At this point, you really start to regret not locking the door on your way in.

"What- well what do you want?" The question is caught in your throat. Your heart starts beating faster when his smile suddenly becomes darker. That can't be good, there is nothing about that smile that reads anything good. Instead it flashes signals of danger. Screeching at you to turn around and run. Get out as fast as you can before something terrible happens to you.

A huge glob of drool drips down from his mouth and onto the floor as he mutters, "to feast."

"Um, feast?" You swallow thickly, his response is difficult to comprehend.

"Well, you see," he inches closer, "I would've had a nice filling earlier. But then you seemed to have interfered, allowing my food to escape."

Oh no, his food.. was he was going to eat the young child?

"Now since I can't eat her.." his eyes flash into a ravenous fiery orange. Before you have time to react, he leaps forward. Wrapping a large gloved hand around your neck and lifting you off your feet. "You will have to suffice!" It growls, rows of razor sharp teeth filling its gaping mouth.

Gasping for air, you desperately kick and paw at the thing towering above you. Trying to get it to release its hold, but it's no use. "F-fuck, no-" you choke out.

It brings you closer, running its nose from your collarbone up your neck. Following the rapid pace of your pulse pumping through the artery under your delicate skin. Deeply inhaling your scent, its eyes roll back. Two clicking sounds gargle up from somewhere within its chest as it shudders slightly. Seemingly liking what it finds.

That is not normal! What the hell is this thing doing?

"Sweet, sweet, fear." Its voice vibrates along your skin, teeth grazing along your flushed flesh. Ready to pierce.. maim and eat.

You thought you were done for.

This is it, this is where I die. Is this really how I go out?

Suddenly it snaps its face to the side, then releases you. Dropping you onto the ground before disappearing completely in the blink of an eye. It’s gone before you can even react.

You shuffle back, harshly coughing as you try to catch your breath. Not even two seconds later, you hear the jiggling of the doorknob on the front door.

"Yo!" The door swings open and Gabby steps inside with her hands full. "I'm here- what the hell!" Finding you in a distressed state on the floor, she throws her stuff down and rushes to you. "Y/n, hey girl! Are you okay, what happened?" She frantically looks around the room.

"I, I.." you finally get your breathing back.

"What happened?" She repeats concerned, kneeling down.

You didn't want to worry her with the assault that just occured. It was bad enough this entity was already after you, so you don't want to get anyone else involved and put into harm's way. Especially Gabby.

Coming up with a quick excuse, you tell her, "it's nothing.. I um, I fainted and I scared myself."

"You fainted?" She examines your state, "you sure about that? You're all shaken up, it looks like you were attacked!"

"No really, I'm fine," you wheeze, "I fell so hard that I couldn't breathe and it scared me. I was alone and I just panicked because that's never happened to me before." Ain't that the truth!

"Well are you alright? Did you hurt anything?"

"I don't think so," you shake your head. "No, I'm alright."

She sighs in relief. "Oh, good. Here, I'll get you some water."

You slowly stand as she gets you a glass. Rubbing the spot behind your upper thigh, you can already feel the bruise coming from where you fell.

"And just so you know, I call bullshit on the whole it 'never happened before' claim." She comes back, offering you the glass.

"I meant on the part that I was alone, and I also don't know why I fainted." You reply after chugging from the cup. Of course you've fainted before. Hell, she's actually witnessed it herself.

She tries thinking of a reason for your false faint claim. "Hm, well have you ate?"

"Not really. I had a pastry at the shop earlier, but that was it. Plus the drink."

"Well then that's it, your blood sugar is most likely low. Then especially with all that walking around this morning with very little food in your system." She walks over to the stuff she brought over.

"Yeah, that's probably what it was," you chuckle. Content in the fact she wasn't suspicious anymore, you felt a great sigh of relief. Hey, you wanted something scary tonight. Well you got it, alright. Having been two seconds away from becoming a human entrée, you're just glad that Gabby had shown up when she did. Despite that though, you truly are grateful for her and appreciate everything that she does for you. She's just looking out for you. And no doubt for her, you'd do the same.

"You need to eat," she brings over a pizza box. "Good thing I made a quick stop on my way over here."

"Ah you're the best!" You acknowledge, lifting the cardboard lid to take a slice out. The hunger's really hitting you now at the scent of food. She sets the box on the table in front of the couch.

"So, about the movie choice for tonight," she digs through her bag, "you said something scary.."

"Mhm," you mumble with a mouth full of cheese.

"We're gonna watch Paranormal Activity." She gleefully states earning a groan from you.

"Seriously, you know I can't stand those boring movies."

She bursts out with a laugh, "got ya! I'm kidding, I brought The Conjuring." Leave it to Gabby to know your taste in horror films. Putting it in the player console, she takes a couple whiffs of the air. "Did you burn the popcorn?"

Damn, it left its scent.

"Uh, no. I haven't made the popcorn yet. I'll make it now." You point out standing up. "Wine?"

"Like you have to ask," she snickers grabbing her own pizza slice.

During the movie, all you could think about was the clown. And the young girl. Hoping that she was safe. You wondered if it still might go after her.

It.. using that term because you aren't quite sure what it is, exactly. Even if it had a name. It was very similar to an animal in the way it stalked and growled, but also supernatural with how it completely vanished in thin air. You need answers.

Gabby had already fallen asleep by the time the movie ended. It was only after eleven, but she knocked out pretty quickly. While she slept, you used the time to do a little internet search on Derry. You poured yourself another glass of wine and sat with your laptop on your legs, typing away. Searching for 'Weird sightings in Derry' and 'Strange Derry reports' and even 'Pennywise.'

But nothing came up on the matter concerning the clown. Although you did come across an article with tragic events that had happened in Derry. You learned something about the town and its bad history before, but haven't gone further into the details until now. The websites provided brief amounts of information on them, from tragic incidents like the Ironworks Factory explosion and the burn down of the black spot. But what really got you was the reports of missing kids. Bingo. There was far too many more than adults. Some of the dates were recent, but you couldn't go back much further for the older dates. Those must not have been documented electronically.

Gab's loud snore pulled you out of your screen trance. Yawning, you figure that an internet search wasn't going to cut it. So you sat there in silence, pondering. Maybe the library? Yeah, the library. They should have history books that provide more details on the events. Hopefully they'll even have some old, written archives you could take a look at.

The time on the laptop read 1:09 am, had you seriously been up this long? It didn't feel like you had. You close the laptop before setting it on the table. I'll go by there tomorrow, you thought as you shifted to lay down comfortably on the couch.

It was a good thing Gabby stayed the night. She's always amazing company. But especially more right now. You also decided not to tell her about the incident from earlier, with the little girl and the drain. Figuring it's best that she doesn't know about it. But at least having her here with you, you hoped that Pennywise wouldn't show up again. You really hoped that he wouldn't. That was all that ran through your mind as you slowly drifted off to sleep.

It's the only thing which you would've allowed, because you had a deep secret. A secret pushed so far in the depths of your soul that would soon come into play. But of course, you didn't know that yet.

End of Part 2.

[iamgrape]

Incubus!! Mayoi Ayase in a Soulmate AU pt2

WARNING IF YOU GO PASS THIS LINE. IT MEAN YOUR WILLING TO READ SUCH WEIRD HC OR DARK CONTENT I HAVE IN-STORE FOR ALL PERV AND CURIOUS CATS LIKE YOU.୧( ˵ ° ~ ° ˵ )୨

TW: Borderline Yan Reader (mayoiisfinewithit) ??? I mean he is one too???Only small part of this chapter is smut, sowwy hornie folks??? Bondage play?? Drama???? Too much plot being slap???Not proofread. How do we tag ????

Previous || current || Next

Demon realm

Since mayoi have graduated from being the only ancient virgin incubus--his friends cant help but congratulate him the moment of his arrival at the shared home he have with his fellow underachievers demons... After some weeks being out doing naughty stuff with you~

"Uwaahhh~ mayo-senpai have a glowing face of those of people in love!" Aira tease the demon of lust senior of his who have a wide silly grin and bashful face as if still immersing his head on the moment he shared with you. .

"I... W-was I-... T-that t-transparent...?!" He held his warm cheeks as that wide grin never seems to live his face. His so happy! He can't contain such happiness!

"I FELT BLINDED. IS THIS WHAT AN INCUBUS LOOK LIKE WHEN FEED WELL...? THEY GLOW AND BECOME MORE BEAUTIFUL? HOW ENVIOUS!!!" aira commented as he cover his eyes from the radiation of the attractive level of mayoi seems to increase ten fold.

"Did that mean you resolved your issue with the help of soul #142269?" Hiiro ask his friend. "#142269....???" Mayoi and aira look at hiiro in confusion on who he meant by that code. Hiiro realize he use a soul code instead of a name.

"Sorry. My bad. They are called (name) (surname) now right?" He corrected his label on you. "That's good that mayoi-senpai issues have been fix. It's time for me to help (name) with their issue too as thanks for helping you." He laugh as his happy that his dear friend have finally been feed well.

"W-whats the issue with with (n-name)...?" The moment the incubus hear such statement from his leader who is a soul reaper.

He wonder if you have unsolved issue that he doesn't know about! But he clearly know what gone to you life in all your lives! He even know the simple problem like you hate and dislike!

Ah. I'm a failure. It seems that I don't know everything on my (name) life.... ' he cried at his own misconduct and incompetent of being your guardian (stalker) demon.

"Oh. It's not that bad of issue like you have, senpai!" Hiiro tried to reassure his friend who he think is worried for you since you two are now a bit of acquaintance since you two did went to do the deed until the fourth base.

"I just have to find certain person for them!" He says as mayoi felt more dejected that he realize your looking for someone, who he doesn't even know about!

"They called the person they are looking for as their very important person." He added causing more painful arrows to be shoot to a certain incubus heart.

"M-mayo-senpai are you o-ok..!?" Aira notice the incubus losing radiant from earlier as hiiro continue to explained as he take out a soul reaper list of souls name. Not noticing the change of mood of the incubby.

"You see I'm always been the one who take their souls and guide them to their next reincarnation! They don't ask for more time as they always been hurry to be reborn after the fourth life. " He look at the list of names, looking for something through the list but failed to do so again in the nth time.

"Base on the happiness level of their years being alive in each life. Their happiness only on its prime on younger years till the age before they hit their adulthood... The rest is just simple living in the edge of breaking point and depression... " He felt bad for his human soul friend who have to endure such repeated cycle.

"Big brother said, depression can be a cause of early death to human. Physical death could be forgotten through reincarnation but emotional pain can cause a seed of madness to root to someone souls... Through dispute all those. The most purest soul I seen to reincarnated over and over again is (name) soul. How amazing is that... Maybe cause their guardian angel is someone unique... " He smiled widely as he share his finding as his finally does soul reaper like job after long study being one. "Eh ... What's wrong mayoi-senpai?" He look at the incubby who's crying in the floor and aira comforting him.

"HIIRO YOU DUMN ASS. HOW COULD YOU NOT TELL, MAYO-SENPAI PROBABLY BECOME EMOTIONAL CAUSE OF THIS?" aira wanna ring his leader neck for being dense and non using common sense again.

"Why through? (Name) is fine through those time. They still smile when they great me each time I guide them. They even smile when they said they say such threatening word toward that person they are looking for. I never seen someone that pure soul yet have that twisted plans toward such specific person." He laugh as he try to lighten the mode.

"What. W-What's the p-Plan? W-who-- is this person anyway.... IdontknowifsomeonelikemehavetherighttoknowBUT...." Mayoi finally find his voice again after feeling more guilty than he should be.

"Eh. Why are you so interested in the topic, mayoi-senpai?" Hiiro is curious why his senior is so engrossed in the topic, as far he knows he shouldn't be that worried about you.

"Hiiro just spill the tea already!!" Aira who's also curious about the whole ordeal wanted to make the soul reaper to continue.

"...ah." hiiro look around for something and look apologetic to aira. " Sorry I don't know where the tea you want me to spill." He stretch his head as he smile sheepishly.

"Let go of me mayo-senpai. I wanna hit this dumb airhead." Aira is quickly stopped by mayoi as become annoyed hiiro being an airhead in the wrong time.

"A-aira-san. P-Please. C-calm down...." -mayoi. His worried that aira is the one who would get hurt instead if he try to punch someone like hiiro who's hard as a brick.

"... Is it a classified information, hiiro-kun?" Tatsumi who's watching in the sideline turn to ask hiiro instead, as he notice the soul reaper seems too reluctant to continue more of the topic.

"Ah... I don't think so?" Hiiro try to think of it's classified category or not. "then can you please continue then?" Tatsumi smile as mayoi and aira look at him with eyes sparkle because his a life saver to people suffering the cliff hanger.

"Ahaha... Ok. Since you all curious lil devils." Hiiro happily do what was ask. "(name) is looking for their 'soul mate'...?" He finally says that cause a certain incubus to look at him in shock. He felt his heart just skip a beat.

Fufu. So there was no third person he doesn't know about. Mayoi can't help but sigh in relief as he fear almost suffocate him at the thought your looking for someone else.

"Oooh, so (name) important person is their soul mate? How lovely!" Aira can't help but commented how romantic it is.

"But don't you say, they have 'twisted plans' for their soul mate?" Tatsumi wonder why is that the case. Aira pause as he remembers now what hiiro said earlier and once again realize his left in a hanging.

"TELL ME MORE!!" He beg.

"On it! Ahaha." Hiiro give a thumbs up as he continue. " The help I'm going assist them is find their soul mate and hit them with this fragment real hard till they get concussion. And then tie them up to be send to (name)." He was grinning cause such plan is such a devious and he can't help but devil approve it.

"...won't that be against some rules?" Aira who can't help but amaze at the help hiiro would go for you.

"Did they request that?" Mayoi who have very concerning grin and love sick gaze ask as his mind went and imagine being mailed to you.

"Crap! Open the windows!! The incubus is letting out lewd hormones!!" Aira who is notice the noticable pink drug gas that the incubus friend of their is letting out is quick to cover his nose and went to step away, waaayyyy away from from the incubus and the other two follow along.

"Oh Devil! I-im s-so S-sorry!!" Mayoi who realize what he unconsciously did cried out an apology as hiiro who is less effected by the scent open the windows and let the scent be blown outside with the help of a fan.

after a while the room finally free from the scent, he curiously look at the black cats who suddenly enter their mating season because of the lust demon drugged hormones scent.

"Oh the cats outside are mating! Won't that mean there will be cute kitten in few months or weeks?" He gleefully commented as aira dragged him out from watching a live cat porn and close the window much to dismay of hiiro who's interested how cat mating goes. Not because he was hornie. His just genuinely curious how it goes.

"S-sorry..." The incubby apologize the nth time as Tatsumi serve him some tea to calm him down.

"It's ok!" Hiiro don't think there something wrong as mayoi is an Incubus to begin with. Such mistakes would been understandable. Through he never know his that strong of an incubby to create such strong drug that almost bother someone who's supposed to be immune in such sexual pleasure needs.

"Ah. Btw it's not (name) request. They said they'll take action on their own. They don't want to bother me but just let me decided how I'll give their soul mate their last memories after death in each life time-- fragments. This very pretty rocks over here." He then show them a jar of sparkling fragments. "They do hinted how they want to throw it to their soul mate head to the point of amnesia or concussion maybe they get forgetful to forget of trying to run away from them." His quite excited to throw rocks on someone. He never know what's the effect of being hit by one. So he is willing to do so once he find the so called soul mate.

"...." -mayoi. Who is the soul mate you been looking for. (The target)

"Woaw (name) seems such a devious but I can see their point they are coming from!" -aira.

"Yup~ I don't understand how human emotions work but guessing the endless cycle being 'rejected' in each lifetime by the same 'bastard' of a 'soul mate' they gotten enough and want to take matter in their own hand. Like that one time they said if their 6th lifetime. They will chain and put a collar on them--" hiiro then continue to say the things you said before.

Each time mayoi listen solemnly taking note each of it for later purpose ~ He already felt excited at the thought of those punishment!'

"Uwah... Mayo-senpai why are you getting turn on by such sadistic punishment..." Aira already back away in the far corner the moment mayoi start to let out hormones again. "Your an M?' he added.

"Ah... I c-can't help it... " Mayoi cover his face that have a wide grin and his sure his eyes being love sick again.

"Agh.... *Hic... SORRY!!" He cried when his senses return to normal when tatsumi start spraying him 'anti-hornie' spray ( one drop of holy water in a spray: a way to keep your Hornie lust demon friend in bay. 100% SAFE!)

"...mayoi are back to your senses yet?". Tatsumi look at his friend worriedly at he put away his spray.

"y-yes." Mayoi weep his tears away as others fix the mess he made again.

"Ah. Mayoi-senpai. Do you 'like' (name)?" Hiiro somehow manage to find connection to his senior action. He did notice how very curious demon he is when the topic of you is being tackle. Remembering some pass event like mayoi being down and mourning each time you passes away till your reborn again.

Each time mayoi would be gone for a while, everyone thought his doing an incubby job but his always come back sometimes when he forget to turn back to his original self, as an innocent looking young human child holding story books.

With a happy grin like he get feed but in reality he did not do a lust demon job but playing with you.

Hiiro did once conclude that he could be the so called soul mate but do even demons have one? As far he knows the only cause he heard someone that isn't human having one is being his parent and airas parent. Yet that's already a rare case.

The fact his an Incubus also don't help. Lust demon usually only feed on Lust not Love. If they were to be soul mate with someone it's one hell of a problematic thing because they will go crazy.

Mayoi don't go crazy yet. Only you did but Only in a sense.

"...*hic... a-actually..." Mayoi realize his now the one who gotten the spotlight and need to confess his own side to tell to the curious lil devils friends of his.

"Imthesoulmate...pleasehitmeimprepairedtosuffer--" he confess as he ready himself to be hit by Hiiro.

"..." The three become silent before Aira start to clap his hands in glee. "Oh how lovely! An incubus with soul mate!" being a happy fruit of a two rare soul mate of non human pair aira is so open in such revolution.

"Oh. Congrats senpai!" Hiiro who find his voice smiled happily congratulating his friend.

"... Incubus and human pair... Ah. " Tatsumi wonder who's your guardian angel who let such odd choice. Knowing that human soul mate have been approved by both fate, angel and that person above.... That being said he who once a guardian angel also was force to do such event.

"How beautiful fates work. Congrats on having a soul mate, mayoi-san." The fallen guardian angel finally join his friends on the happy party.

"T-thank you..." Being surrounded by friend who happy for you in a demon realm is such a happy chances. His glad he have friends like his unit.

"W-wait-- hiiro STOP YOULL KILL MAYO-SENPAI IF YOU THROW THOSE!" aira notice hiiro happily opening the jar of fragments and was about to throw a curve ball directed to the incubus as promise.

"Eh. But mayoi-senpai is fine with it!" With eyes sparkling like little innocent child who don't know if he did throw one of those to someone with his very off the chart straight they going to meet their creator.

"It's ok aira! Someone irresponsible like the insignificant me is fine with it!" The very insane Masochist incubus who find such punishment you indirectly hinted is so hot. " I-- I have a rope too! Tie me up and m-mail me to (name) afterwards!" Taking out a red rope he have for incubus stuff but never use able to use but seeing this is a chance to use it in such amazing case.

The lovesick grin and eyes of the incubus seems like a lost case beyond help.

"OH GREAT DEVIL, YOU BOTH ARE DEVIOUSLY INSANE. TATSU-SENPAI HELP!!!" aira cried as his thorn of wanting to spray some anti hornie spray to the incubus and stopping the very excited hiiro who wanna commit crime in board daylight.

"Ahaha... How lovely day it is..." Tatsumi can't help but chuckle at how lovely the whole place is but seeing the pleading look of the young demon, he did offer some help to console and stop hiiro from doing such act and just let him give mayoi the fragments without going physical.

Mayoi held the jar carefully and left his friends before he could be another season of being out of self control again.

In his secret room, he held the fragments that let him hear your last words before youll be reborn in your lives.

[ Does this thing really work? If so... I wanna ask if there's something wrong with me for you to run away from the moment of meeting... If so I'll try to change it in this new life! ]

[ .... I guess I did something wrong again. ]

...

[ ... Your not human? If that the case it's fine with me. Just don't disappear each time when I reach that certain age and just be with me...]

...

[ Clearly your doing this on purpose. Bloody hell. when I get to remember your annoying routine before the said age. I WILL MAKES SURE YOU SURE THAT YOUR NOT ESCAPING AGAIN ]

...

[ Ah. A person who went too a lot of cycle of rebirth just to make sure a stupid demon soul mate would appear again to only leave afterwards. This is getting tiring... I hope that soul reaper crack your head open to get some senses in that silly head of yours to see I'm fine even if your a demon! ]

[ .... Ya one selfish devil. Not only ya'r like ya some spineless slug for runnin a'way from me but never let me find love that isn't ya.. ya are lucky I will not throw ya off the ship, ya bloody chowder head]

...

[ Mk. I have enough of you lil antics. If you appear and leave again. Fine, be my guest. Just remember if you appear again in different occasions I'll make sure you'll know a human being is a worse demon than real demons are. :) ]

The incubus felt tears falling in his eyes when he realize his actions out of fear and cowardness to face you because his not a human like you when your will verse of how bad creature, a demon like him for a soul mate is horrible choice of fate ( even through his so happy having you as a soul mate )-- cause you great suffering.

"...*hic.." holding the precious fragments he walk to the black mirror walk through it, soon he disappear from demon world to the human world.

･ﾟﾟ･*:༅｡.｡༅:*ﾟ:*:✼✿　

Human world.

Your in your work place, listening to an amazing ASMR while working for the society. "Hm.. hm... " Humming a tone with a smile that leads all your coworker who's use to your neutral or gloomy atmosphere to be leave in daze.

Coworker#1:"uwah.... (Surname) sure is unusual happy today ... They look kinda attractive when happy... (◕ᴗ◕✿)"

Coworker#2:"they are probably listening to a porn again." (◔‿◔)

Coworker#1 wack the head of the disgusting word of her fellow colleagues. "Don't slander (surname), they aren't disgusting like the likes of you." She nags the man.

Coworker#2: "what the hell?! (Surname) always read porn when it's lunch break! They read it with a straight face too!" He always seen you read it and not even bothering by the content like it's some Shakespeare novel instead of porn.

You look up from your work as you realize your name is being called and chatted many times by gossiping colleagues.

"im reading those books for reference." You corrected the assuming thoughts of your coworker who thought that you have bad addiction to reading unappreciated things out in public.

"... " The two colleagues of yours eyes widen in fear when they realize they were heard. "S-SORRY!!" they both apologize in unison. You lower the volume of your ASMR and look at your coworker.

"It's fine. Gossip is normal thing in work place." You really don't care what they do or gossip since it's their own free will.

As far you remember you live your life researching about incubus and succubus --because your so called imaginary friend is one-- using an open source which is porn or hentai.

Since you don't know where to find a proper book for those kind of subject. Through you still did what normal human in a society does. Go to school, go to work and be plastic to people around you and research more about lust demon in the sideline.

"man... if your hobby is reading such lewd books what would you do if your soul mate dislike such concerning addiction you have?" Your male coworker thought that since your fine with gossip, he thought it be fine to finally be open with his concern about such hobby of yours.

"...." You look at your coworker dead in the eye at the mention of the word 'soulmate'. He seems to notice that it's a bad topic and was about to apologize when you give them a close eyes smile that almost blinded them.

"that won't be a problem. Worse could happened is me locking them up in my basement and making sure they won't run away again even if I mean I have to cut of his wings :)" you says like it's not a concerning words of deranged person.

"Ahaha. You two should really go back to work of yours. Boss is giving us warning look." Your quick to change the topic before they could comment what's wrong with your mind.

"Oh shit! Let's go!!" They both forget the words you spoke our of surprise of the boss yelling at them again and run off back to their own space.

You went to your space again and turn up the volume of what you been listening on all those time.

[

" ahmm ha..."

"..."

"ah... T-touching the root of my w-wings... Ahh...haa...*hic (Name)~"

*giggle.

"n-noo.... Ah... Y-yes.... I-im just sensitive in that part.... "

"m-my h-horns...? Ah... I g-guess I have too many erogenous zone.... Fufu.."

"... Yes my wings do work and aren't for display... "Hic. Do they seems like they were for show? Isweariwasnotprepairedtoflywhenilandedontopofyoudontturnmywingstofriedwings....!!"

"

...

]

While listening to the ASMR that is recorded by you. to record the incubus of yours words and voice when the two of you are apartment at your day offs you use in one go after piling it up for long time. Just so you could spend more time with Mayoi without interruption.

You made sure not to speak loud enough to be recorded since you would rather listen to his voice telling you about himself.

You close your eyes and yawn. Looking at the clock at the wall. You went back to focus on your work.

Time goes by in a flash and the moment you arrive at your apartment your barely awake.

"!!!" Your eyes widen when someone envelope you with a warm hug the moment you close the door behind you.

"*Hic..m sorry. I'm sorry..." You heard the person holding you so dearly cry. Hearing the familiar voice of the incubus you let your guard down and hug him back with a smile. Your tiredness seems to disappear at your soul mate presence.

"sorry for what?" You wonder why his crying again and pat his back as the two of you slowly seat in the floor as gravity seems to pull you down but you have no problem at it as you rub his back to calm him down.

"s-sorry for being s-stupid... *sob...t-thinking you could live without a ...*hic l-lustful d-demon like me... in your l-life because... someone like me is fated to be your e-eternal pair... Someone that is not like of your kind... You could gotten someone normal ... A human like you... Instead of me..." He says as his hold on you tighten. Even so he said you could be more fortunate if you have a human soul mate and not a lust demon.

He dislike it, he loath the very idea of someone holding you that isn't him. To do those fun time together with someone else instead of him, makes him want to drag you to the demon realm with him instead.

Yet he can't be that selfish. What if you dislike him for being selfish? His long gone deep in the whole of adjusting his own moral just for you~ he don't even know if he should behave like a demon or a human.

"What if you get judge by your fellow humans and get burned alive? What if you don't accept me cause your religious in one lifetime... ?What if I'm too problematic with my needs...? Many what if stop me from trying to approach you ..." He let out his deep secret and you hear him out with open mind at his point of view.

"Sorry I only stayed by your side till your in your teen... My lustful nature would want me to jump on you and ruined you each time I start to sense hormones from you... " He don't want to leave you when his always been by your side each time you the you open your eyes to your new life... to play and spend time with you to be your very precious friend. That he would happily teach and guide about basic things you need in human society in each era your born into.

".. what if? What if it's all fine? Won't that mean we been long together?" You mumble. Through you chuckle how such events of endless circle of him disliking his own nature.

"Those are what if. It's fine now since your here with me~" you hummed as you lean your head against him. Enjoying the warmth and close contact.

"I ... " He wanted to say something but he wonder again if someone like his kind can even say such words with full honesty. You lean away to look at his bashful face that have tears running down from his beautiful teary eyes. You reach out to weep his tears away and kiss his forehead.

"I wonder if it's because we're soulmates... But even if your so stupid ln those lifetime. You still there beside me even it's a short while in each lives... I love each moment... I love you..." You will never continue the endless charades of searching and being reborn again just to make him appear again by your side.

His a selfish demon who shower you with affection that demons won't do as it's a sign of weakness. Yet in your memories, his pretending to be a human while teaching you things school or your guardian won't teach you since they are all busy being a slave to society and currency.

Teach you and tells you stories about long ago. A friend who would weep your tears away or play with you when others think your weird.

His eyes widen at your honest confession. He can feel your love and honesty and it's drowning him with love he felt drunk.

"I... l-love you too.." finally able to find his own courage to say his own reply. Even how odd it's for incubus to desire and to love someone. His already an outcast from his own kind, being honest now doesn't change his status either.

Laying his forehead against you and looking at each other eyes. Enjoying such moment of peace.

"... So mayoi gotten my last words fragments?" You break the silent as you realize why he suddenly went up apologizing to you like crazy. It's a guess but seeing him shaken up and blushing as if he remembers something that cause him to felt hornie again.

"... I don't remember saying anything lewd???" You wonder what's up with this incubus who start to fidget and whine while holding you close.

"Agh... (N-name)..." He whimper as he control his lewd self but he felt so warm and running with lust in mind again! You being close making his self control disperse.

"C-can w-we...." He flatter his eyes are you.

"smh, I have work tomorrow." You apologize as you realize that you can't get late or be absent for tomorrow since there's a monthly report.

"i-is that so..." He suddenly become a sulking puppy when he realize you won't and can't spend time with him!

"... Ah. I can help you but I won't engage to much because I need to wake up early or else I'll get fired." Seeing his pitiful face. You give up on your pass. His eyes sparkle as he heard it before he stood up with you in his arms And run to your bed room with happy smile.

Oh shit. I been had.' you thought as you fallen in his trap. 'its fine. It's fine... I just have to let him have some fun without being engaged in it!' is your thoughts before you were thrown in the bed and kiss by the impatient needy incubus, tasting sweet honey that seems to drown you with lust instead of keeping a firm mind, you two did not go out of the bed till early in the morning.

...

( ring )

"ah.. ha... P-please.... " The mess of an incubus under you is already in a begging mess will being tied in a red bondage he brought with him. His limbs tied together as his on his knee with his back on you. a bit of move would cause friction of the tight rope moving around his sensitive nipples, crotch and his semi tied wings. His in edge each second and his loving it!

"Hmm???" You were playfully trace his collar bone down to the root of his wings, he squirm and start to wine when you stop touching his erogenous zone in his wings to look around at the source of the ring.

"(Name)...?" He calls you as he look over his shoulder, at you who's attention is else where. He cant help but pout when your not giving him attention.

"Did you hear something?" You ask since your pretty sure that ring sound so dreadfully familiar.

"No." He denied before he use some dirty trick to remove your attention to whatever that is distracting your attention from him-- by increasing the effect of his mark on you.

"... You." You quickly notice such move and narrowed your eyes at mayoi who seems like a irresistible drug.

"S-sorry I accidentally d-did that... Sorry, am I p-pushing my l-limit?" he give you a look that was thought to all sex demon to use when their prey is trying to escape-- using beauty trap.

1. Release full charm point

2. Try to act pitiful.

"Ah..." He whined as he try to get off without your help. But his still tied up with a rope leaving it a hopeless case, causing him to shed crocodile tears. "*Hic... Ah.." he bite his lower lips at his tragic situation.

3. Look seductive while doing so.

"(n-name).... " He whimper looking at you with hopelessness but dejected when he realize your occupied to help him."n-nevermind..." He look down sulking. His wings lay flat with him.

"... Bruh.." You who get a gasp on whats his trying to do since you seen such case in many books.

You watch him give you a side look before looking away whimpering like a pitiful man, thinking you Wont get fooled again.

"it's ok, you can leave-- ahh...." He thought he failed on his move until you flip him over to seat on top of his trobbing boner that is leaking precum.

"Hmmn~" you hummed as you held his neglected dick to position it at your ready entrance, teasingly. Upon contact he squirm and trying to move his hips but it only cause him to moan cause he created friction again.

"Agh... *Hic .." he cried because your playing with him again.

"(name.... Haahmm...!!" He don't even have to plead you before you seat and pushing him deep inside in one trust.

"Ah~ so w-warm...!!" He moaned as he felt his head just went to cloud nine.

"Ha.... Ah..." You cover your lips as your too embarrassed to openly moan like this hornie bitch under you is doing. Your sure his wailing could be heard across the thick walls of your room.

"S-so noisy.... Ah..." You start to move as you finally adjusted with his bulging size deep in you. You could felt your soul ascending each moment you try to move but your body unconsciously clenching your walls on the him, making your legs weak and trusting back at his base.

Causing both of you two moan each time, you already fallen at his trap and ignored the five following ring.

...

"you hornie bitch is going to get me fired." You groan as you rush to get your morning routine done just after you heard your alarm rang loudly for the last time while still on top of him, moaning. "

S-sorry...! " he apologize. As he serve you some cooked breakfast. He thought that's at least he can do to help you.

"your apology won't get me out of my current dilemma if I were to lost my job. I still need to feed myself ok?" You rolled your eyes as he try to look pitiful in front of you again. You seat in front of him to eat breakfast And internally thought how good of a cook he is.

"I... I can take you to your work faster." He felt even more guilty, so he offer to take you to your place without going through public service.

He look at you who's about to leave the house in hurry.

"..." You look at him doubtfully before you take your chances. He held your hand and went to one of your wall mirrors and walk through it.

Eyes widen you follow along and soon you find yourself at the break room.

"Wow... That's fast. I'm even five minutes early!" You smile and sigh in relief.

"I..I'm glad I can help then... " He felt happy your not longer mad.

"I'll be going then --" he was about to leave when you held his hand.

"Can you change your outfit to something casual? Human casual ok?" You look at him and thought it's a good time introduce him to your coworker and work place. Not because their approval matter. It's a normal tradition in your work place anyway.

You also just want to do those stuff you read, Introducing their precious person to anyone they know so theyll know your taken and found your soul mate. Your proud and boosting that soul mate is not someone to hide and keep hidden like some other people.

"e-eh... O-ok..." He saw the happy smile in your face as you wait for him to change cloths with the help of magic before you drag him to your work area. With happy grin like an innocent child introducing their new friend to their parents.

He usually don't want to interact with bunch of people because being a incubus made him very sensitive to all emotions of people around him, cause him problem if they all in one place. But he is willing to do so if your happy.

Your coworker look at mayoi who they never seen before but the fact his incubus beauty would let anyone in any gender fall into lust.

"who's that looker with you?" One of your coworker look at mayoi with flattering gaze of flirting. Mayoi fidget as he felt the emotion of lust coming from the your coworker and hide behind you.

As an incubby it would be a praise if someone think of him as attractive to lust for but his not your normal incubus. He dislike it.

"if you flatter your eyes at him again. I will make sure you'll be blind the next moment." You giggle as you glance at your coworker.

"(N-name)...!" Mayoi can't help but blush at your Possessiveness over him. His heart flatter at your fear of losing him.

Ah, He wanna kiss you so bad right now~

"t-that... Why did you even bring someone that is not an employee with you?" The person who wanted to flirt with Mayoi can't even resort back as she felt like the threat is not a joke.

"oh. I wanna introduce my soul mate, of course. Isn't that a tradition in this office? " You act dumb before you hug mayoi with a child like smile. "This is mayoi Ayase." You Introduce him to all. "his my most important person~ " shamelessly kiss his cheeks causing him to look at you in surprised at your pda. His look is the same shock your coworker is giving you. Because they all thought your that robotic person who won't show much emotion much less do PDA. Yet seeing that side of you that let them realize your still human who would be open to your soul mate. They all congratulate you even through some envy how lucky you are for you good looking soul mate and jokingly say they might seduce him one day.

"oh? You wanna seduce him? Do you know it's not a crime to take precautions against thief... Nor society of ours question if we our possessive on what's ours even if we eradicate the threat before it become a problem~" you giggle as you clap your hands together that is still linked with mayoi. You felt him shudder in delight at your possessiveness.

"Not that I blame you~ mayoi is sinful beauty ~" your quick to change your mood as you slap the back of the coworker who jested just now.

"Awm.." the poor coworker groan at your harmless slap on his back. "Sorry I was just kidding!" He added quick. He is bloody sure you are one of those psycho people who's possessive beyond normal on their soul mate and your soul mate seems fine and more happy that you are. His worried for him because you seems problematic for human standard for a mate.

He don't realize mayoi is not human. And having a soul mate for a demon like him that is also possessive over him is a blessing and wonderful thing for a demon~

"you better be." You says before mayoi have to leave since it's already too early in the morning for him and he need to go back to demon realm again.

[hyunnieshannie]

EX

Chapter 2: A person you can date, not marry.

Pairing: Han Jisung x Fem. Reader

Word Count: 5,179

General Synopsis: Your ex? Shitty. Your family? Worse. Your best friend? Left for a tour in the middle of one of the worst times of your life. How are you meant to deal with planning what should have been your wedding, dealing with your family, and pretending like you're not falling apart all on your own?

General Warnings: Idol!Jisung, mentions of other Idols (P1Harmony/Seventeen), all views on these idols are purely fictional. Idol AU. Mentions of cheating, mentions of smoking and drug use (weed and cigarettes), Mentions of drinking, angst, self esteem issues, depression. Y/N is older than Jisung. (I'm sorry for the jokes that come out of this) (any tags I missed please feel free to let me know! More tags to be added as the story goes on.)

→ A/N: Welcome back to 'EX' I hope you guys enjoy this second part <3 I will be creating a full master list for all fics soon, thank you guys for your patience. I've had a random run for this story, and it's been taking up space in my head so I just HAD to get it out there! Please enjoy <3 ALSO if you would like to be added to the tag list for this series please don't be shy to message me any time <3

PREVIOUS ꕀ❀ꕀ SERIES MASTER LIST ꕀ❀ꕀ NEXT

The lunch for the most part went well, the boys discussing their future plans with their respective groups. Meanwhile you spent most of your time staring at your phone at the hundreds of incoming texts from Leah. 

We should start planning right away! ~Leaaah

Sure.~Y/N

I'm so excited! ~Leaaah

I’m sure, it’s a huge event. ~Y/N

For the bachelorette party, I only have like 3 friends, maybe Stepheee can invite some of the girls from his company! ~Leaaah

You sigh at the message, Leah still hasn't made any of her own friends; and now she expects your friends to invite idols to her bachelorette party. 

“Is she fucking serious?” Taeyang mutters, you turn to him seeing now that he’d been peeking over reading your messages. It was a normal occurrence, whenever you’d be on your phone he’d usually look over at what you were doing. It never bothered you, you had nothing to hide. Surely he had expected to see you scrolling through instagram or twitter, looking at memes or something music related, but not this. 

Keeho was quick in snatching your phone, and reading over the messages. Intak leaned close to him as he also read through them. “Fuck, no.” Keeho says bitterly, “Not happening,” 

“Three friends is fine for a party, why does she specifically want random girls at her party?” Intak asks, Jisung who sat there confused looks between the three of you. 

“Because Leah is an all out kind of person, she wants a big huge party for everything.” Keeho sighs, as he scrolls through your other messages, “If she wants a celebrity party she can ask Jeonghan, why should I ask girls from my company to go? Her fiance should be forcing her to make friends, not me.” her fiance. Echoed through your mind, 

 “Wait what, Jeonghan is getting married?” Jisung says through a bite of his sandwich, 

“Yeah, to Y/N’s sister.” Intak says quietly, Jisung stares back at him as he processes the information, 

“I thought he was single? Didn’t he like, just get out of a four year relationship?” Jisung asks, placing his sandwich back down on its plate and looking directly at you,

“Five years actually,” you whisper, Jisung looks at you confused as the table falls silent, Keeho still eagerly reading through your messages.

“You fucking agreed?” Keeho scoffs, disappointment written across his face, “Why would you agree to be her maid of honor Y/N!” 

“Well what was I supposed to do Kee? She’s my sister!” you fiddle with your fork poking at the salad in front of you, your hunger completely dissipated from the stress, causing your stomach to twist leaving you feeling nauseous. Jisung opens his mouth to speak but is immediately interrupted by Keeho who seems to be angrier than you are at this moment.

“You’re supposed to say ‘No sorry I don’t feel like helping you organize your wedding with my ex’ and leave it at that!” Keeho exclaims, you know he had a point but your morals of ‘Family first’ would never allow you to do such a thing, 

 “Wait one more second, you’re his ex?” you nod at him as he stares at you wide eyed, great now he knows about my miserable love life. “And now he’s marrying your sister?” his words burn into your brain, engraved there now and probably for the rest of your life. “And she wants Keeho to do what exactly?” 

“Invite girls from our company to go to her bachelorette party.” Intak sighs, “I feel used.” 

“YOU feel used? I’ve known Leah all her life, and now she’s asking me to introduce her to idols? She can ask her fiance if she wants that, but I will not be doing it.” 

“Guys. We said we weren’t gonna talk about this.” Taeyang says as he reaches his arm across your shoulders pulling you in. You rest your head on his shoulder, as he lightly pats you. “Lets just enjoy our outing okay?” They quickly come to an agreement of not speaking of it but as you reach over to grab your phone Keeho pulls it further away. 

“You’re not getting this back.” 

“Kee, give it.”

“No. You’re gonna keep reading the messages, and make yourself sad.” He says matter-of-factly, once more the tension around the table is thick and the air is heavy as the boys all sit in silence. Keeho stares deeply into your phone as it vibrates again, his body language giving every indication that he was close to snapping on Leah. Jisung notices it quickly, and pulls the phone straight out of his hands. Keeho stares at him absolutely shocked at the action, one he didn’t expect out of Jisung who typically stayed out of situations that were none of his business. 

“Neither of you are getting it.” He says confidently, “You, as Keeho says will get sad, and you” he says pointing at Keeho, “You will only get angrier, and I personally, would like to see everyone smiling.” Keeho rolls his eyes at him, knowing what he said was true but he would still like a moment to yell at Leah. That moment would have to wait until later. ꕀ❀ꕀ

The five of you finish your food quickly, and make your way out of the building, walking down the street. You could hear your phone vibrating in Jisungs pocket and a part of you wanted to sneakily reach for it, but Taeyang had his hold on you, walking with his arm on your shoulder as Intak walked on the other side of you. “Jesus,” Jisung mutters as he pulls your phone out of his pocket, quickly turning it off. “I have an idea.” 

“Say it.” Intak says, 

“The JYP building is a block over that way,” he points in the direction of the building, “Let's go there for a second.” 

“To do what?” Intak questions, 

“Y/N hasn’t been to any of the company buildings Ji, you might overwhelm her with a tour.” Taeyang says, 

“Not for a tour, something else.” Jisung turns quickly, walking in the direction of his company's building, the rest of you following closely behind. The tension never did die down from the restaurant and everyone walked silently for the most part. Jisung walked while texting, who? No one knew. His phone rings loudly as you all arrive in front of the large building, “Hey,” he says into it, “Yeah we’re here come down.” The five of you waited in the lobby for whoever it was that called Jisung. The silence deafening as you all stood awkwardly, the sound of an elevator rings through the lobby effectively cutting through the silence. 

“Ji, I thought you weren’t coming in today.” An accented voice calls, Bang Chan, and behind him stood Hyunjin who just stared at your group. “See you later Jinnie.” Chan waves to him as he nods politely walking out of the building, 

“I’m not,” Jisung turns to Keeho, holding out his hand, “Phone. Now.” 

“What? No.” 

“If Y/N isn’t allowed to have her phone neither are we.” Jisung says flatly, Taeyang reaches into his pocket first slapping down his phone on Jisung’s hand, quickly followed by Intak, Keeho still hesitating to hand his over. 

“What if we need to call for help or something?” 

“I’ll have mine then.” 

“How is that fair?” 

“Because all of you have a connection to Y/N’s sister and I don't, therefore she won’t be bothering me, or any of you today.” 

“Ji? What is this?” Chan asks, 

“This is a phone free day with friends is what it is,” Jisung was serious about this, he was witnessing all of his friends becoming angry and hurt, and you who he’d only just met seemed to be taking it better than the three boys who claimed to be your bodyguards.

 The night before as he hung out with Intak and Taeyang, Keeho had called Taeyang. He had placed the phone on speaker as Keeho spoke of how you’d needed a distraction, how your depression would surely come back if they didn’t do anything. He had listened attentively as Intak claimed that as your (self proclaimed) bodyguard he’d make sure ‘he’ wouldn’t ever get to you again. At the time Jisung hadn’t realized that the ‘he’ in his statement had been Jeonghan.

He watched Taeyang’s face drop the second he heard you were sad, and though he felt deep inside he was intruding on a private conversation; he knew that he’d be able to understand how you felt. With his own experiences in these matters he felt he could help. So without any doubt, he had spoken out loud letting Keeho know he was present at the time, asking if Keeho would mind if he tagged along. Jisung’s impulsive need to help someone in need had taken over. He was prepared to meet one of Keeho’s friends, because if Intak, Keeho, and Taeyang had claimed you as their, (in their words) ‘seventh member’ then of course you were a good person, and good people deserve good things. 

Keeho had agreed, assuming the day would go as he planned without mention of what had happened that night, and because Keeho also had a favor to ask of Jisung, one he thought of at that moment while on the phone. 

“What if I agree to the favor you asked of me?” Jisung says under his breath, hoping for you not to hear him. Keeho sighs, placing his phone on the top of the pile. Jisung quickly turns to Chan and hands them all to him with a small, nervous smile. “Keep these safe for me will ya?”

“So you’ll do it?” Keeho says, 

“If it makes the six of you feel better then yes,” Jisung says.

“What are you two whispering about, what favor?” you ask, the two look at you. Jisung is calm. While Keeho looked panicked, 

“Nothing, just something I agreed to help with.” Jisung says as he looks at Chan who also looks concerned. 

“This isn’t gonna affect the boys is it?” Chan asks, 

“Well it won’t affect Felix, Minho, Seungmin or Jeongin,” Jisung smirks, 

“So it will affect me?” 

“Probably not, we’ll talk later about it ok? I was gonna do it tonight, but- desperate times ya know?” Chan nods, as he clutches the phones. You ponder what the favor Keeho could have asked of Jisung but it really was none of your business, what the boys did in their free time. So you dropped the question quickly. Chan looks to you as you stood there being held tightly by Taeyang, 

“Your girlfriend Theo?” he smirks, 

“Y/N unnie?” Taeyang asks, sounding almost grossed out, “NO! Of course not she-” you rip away from his grasp; looking at him with the most offended expression you could muster. 

“Tell me why you sounded grossed out right now!” you say hitting him lightly but hard enough for him to feel it, he guards himself quickly in attempts to save himself from your attack.

“Wait, Y/N stop hitting me, I'm sorry!” he pleads for his life as you hit him, “I just meant that you’re like, our best friend! No one has ever asked that before Y/N I swear I wasn’t grossed out!” you continue hitting him as he laughs,  he quickly runs behind Chan using him as a human shield, as you walk towards the pair prepared to attack him once more, 

“You sounded offended! Am I really that bad!” you say, “No, NO! You’re great I just, it's just- its- not you it's me!” Taeyang gave his best acting, as he let the words fall from his mouth, ever so cheeky as you gave him nothing but a ‘death stare’

“You’re not my favorite anymore.” 

“Y/N don’t do this! You can’t take that title from me!” 

“I already have!” you huff as you cross your arms, turning your head away dramatically. Jisung giggled as he watched the interaction, happy that all of you were at least talking and laughing now.

“Who could ever replace me?” Taeyang pouts as he comes out of hiding, grabbing you to hug you but you pull away from his reach leaving him confused, a sew stammering words leaving his lips as he searched for something to say within his brain, 

“Call Soul and tell him he’s been upgraded to best boy.” you smirk, Taeyang drops to his knees in true soap opera fashion, staring up at the ceiling dramatically. 

“How could you replace me with Soul Y/N! Please, I'll be better!” he cries out, but you turn further away from him  “Chan what have you done! Why would you ask me that!” 

“My bad, you two just looked close!” Chan giggles, 

“H-How’s it his fault, you sounded so offended! Your face when he said it, I-” Intak says between heavy breaths, clutching his stomach as he laughs loudly, crouching as tears from laughing too hard stream down from his eyes. Keeho stabilized himself against the wall as his laughing fit took over his ability to stand, “Wait!” Intak yells out, “YOU’D CALL SOUL BEFORE UPGRADING MY TITLE?” he pouts at you, giving you large puppy dog eyes. “I- I knew you never loved me!” 

“Shut up!” you laugh as you bring him into a hug, Taeyang looking at you as if you’d betrayed him as he watched you hug Intak. The laughter dies down, as the boys catch their breaths, Chan and Jisung giggling between themselves at the whole dramatic ordeal. “Anyways sorry,” you say as you wipe your tears away, “My name is Y/N” you extend your hand to Chan who takes it in a firm grip shaking it, 

“Christopher but call me Chan or Channie or Chris honestly whatever works, it’s nice to meet you Y/N. I’ve heard good things” he offers you a warm smile. Meeting Chan felt like a dream, the music major in you jumped with pure excitement at the idea of meeting the man that worked on the very songs you loved to sing to. Sure Jisung was also a part of that team, but you were no lyricist. You are a producer, and Chan embodied every aspect of a true producer. Chan was one of the people you looked up to, often watching his streams and replaying parts where he’d come up with some new beat. Only later to hear it in one of their songs, you admired his work ethics, and how he could quickly make the back track to a song while sitting on a live stream with thousands of fans clawing for his attention, begging for just one small interaction from him to read their comments. You could appreciate how he both joked, and occasionally flirted with the fans while also staying focused on his task. Multi-tasking was not one of your strong suits. You couldn’t even begin to imagine what the room would feel like if he didn’t have the distractions of his adoring fans. You had many questions about it all, what equipment he used, if he preferred to work in silence or with light music playing, what kind of mixing console he used. What was it like working with seven other people each having their own style. You had heard their solo songs on youtube, and it fascinated you how different each person was. Yet how well organized they were as the group he formed. He had chosen them all, hand picked them for his own reasons and managed to create a unique sounding group. They weren’t some group that a company cherry picked and placed together, no. They were all different, with so many bold personalities, and for that you respected them, you respected him.

“You have?” 

“Yeah, those three don’t shut up about you,” he nods to your favorite three idiots, before looking back to you, “I hope to see one of your famous car performances live, one day! The video Keeho sent, of you singing Cheese was quite entertaining,” he chuckles, your face burns red, as you slowly turn to the three boys who now stood looking at you in panic, 

“Y/N…” Keeho says as he raises his hands, “Let us explain-”  

“You took a video!” you say as you step towards them, “And then sent it to people?!” 

“Run.” Intak says, as the three of them turn sprinting out of the building, so quickly it almost looked cartoonish, it reminded you of how Shaggy would run from ghosts in Scooby-Doo, a stuttering step before he actually took off running. 

“I’m going to kill them.” you mutter, still smiling wide. You should have expected this, especially from those three idiots. “It was nice meeting you Chan, but I have three children to scold.”

“Oh, man do I understand how you feel!.” Chan smiles, 

“It’s that single parent life am I right?” he lets out a loud laugh, nodding as you turn to hunt down your three grown up toddlers. Jisung quickly waves goodbye as he speedwalks his way over to you, smiling widely as he looks at your very determined expression. 

After finally catching up to the three boys you scolded them for a solid minute as they all sat there with their tails between their legs. Taeyang wanting to be back on your good side was the first to fold, placing all of the blame on Keeho as he claimed it was his idea. Keeho folded next, claiming that it was Intak who took the video,  while Intak stood there looking sorry for his crime. The four of you laughed it off as Jisung mentioned how the video was really quite the experience. 

ꕀ❀ꕀ

The five of you continued about your day doing whatever came to mind, a bit of window shopping and taking pictures on Jisung’s phone in every ‘fun’ or ‘pretty’ location you came across, since he had decided to take everyone else’s away. Keeho cracked jokes the whole time and slowly you forgot about agreeing to be Leah’s maid of honor. You enjoyed the company, and by the end of the day you had laughed so hard with each of them that you swore you would gain abs from the killer workout it gave your core. 

Your stomach grumbled loudly as sat on the swings in a park you had all stopped in. Intak who heard it laughed out loud, “Y/N/N is hungry!” he says as he gets up from the swing. Taking your hand in his as he leads you away from the group who follow eagerly for dinner, “Want me to text the guys? They should be around, maybe we can all go to that one place Y/N likes for dinner” 

“How are you gonna do that when Chan has our phones?” you giggle, 

“Shit. I forgot,” 

“Idiot,” you say lovingly as you squeeze his hand. 

“I got it,” Jisung says, stopping to pull his phone out. He quickly sends out a few texts and continues following, “Here,” he says handing you his phone, “Google the place” you quickly type in the name of your favorite restaurant and hand it back to him, he clicks on the call button and lift the phone to his ear. He quickly makes a reservation nodding to you all as he confirms everything. You walk hand in hand with Intak as he tells you about how hard everyones been working for their upcoming tour. The other three walked in front of you, as they discussed what they would be ordering. 

“I’m excited for you to be in the city Y/N, it’ll be nice not waiting for you to drive an hour to hang out.” he whispers, smiling wide at you. 

“In the city?” 

“Yeah, has he not told you yet?” 

“Told me what?” 

“Oh, shit.” Intak whispers, his hand now squeezing yours out of nervousness. “I should let Keeho tell you.” Tell me what? A pit forms in your stomach, the anxiety of not knowing something Keeho has planned courses through your veins, your heart pumps quickly as you overthink the situation. Why would I be in the city? Is he kicking me out? I like our home though. Intak quickly lets go of your hand and rushes up to Keeho, whispering to him quickly. Keeho whispers something back, and Intak looks a bit relieved, He always tells me everything… you think to yourself, what is he hiding from me. 

ꕀ❀ꕀ

Jisung holds the door open for all of you as you walk into the restaurant. The delicious smells overwhelm your senses, as you sink into a sense of familiarity, but still your brain persists. Reminding you of all the times you had been here with Jeonghan. 

As you all sat waiting for everyone else to arrive, you thought more and more of everything Leah and Jeonghan could have possibly done while you were completely unaware of everything. Had he brought her here? Did he tell her the sweet words of adoration he once told you? The stress built up until you had, had enough. You stand silently, as the others watch. Leaving your spot between Taeyang and Keeho to step outside. Pulling the pack of smokes from your pocket and quickly lighting one up. You inhaled deeply, the familiar head rush from the nicotine hitting hard in the cold winter air. You stood in the cold with no jacket, as the wind sent chills down your spine causing small goosebumps to run up your arms. Your legs shook, partially from the cold and partially from the thought of Jeonghan. How could he have done this to you? How could he have left you for her? How could she have taken him with open arms after you had cried for countless hours. She had known the whole time how much you adored him, she had always known how you felt. But in your time of need, when you were absolutely heart broken. She was madly in love with him. You never sought out comfort with Leah during the breakup, how could you knowingly seek her out while she slept next to him? You felt like you had no one, even though you were surrounded by amazing friends, you truly felt completely, painfully, alone. Nothing feels worse than being in a room full of people willing to help, yet feeling so helpless, useless and unlovable. Maybe you were truly destined to be alone. You think back to the words an old classmate back home once said to you in a drunken ramble. “You are the type of girl people date. Not marry.” a reality you now felt the need to accept. 

“What does that even mean?” Jisung asks as he walks up behind you, he had come out to check up on you since you hadn’t returned for a few minutes. Figuring by now you’d be cold without your jacket. He drapes it around your shoulders as you continue your smoke, exhaling a thick gray cloud, a mix of smoke, and your warm breath showing in the cold winter air. 

“It means, I’m good enough to have around for short term things, not good enough for the long term.” Jisung thinks over the statement carefully selecting his next words. 

“I don’t really know you,” he starts. You open your mouth to apologize but he quickly cuts you off, “But I wouldn’t say that’s true. From what I’ve seen people enjoy having you around. You’ve been the bigger person in a shitty situation, and you handled today well. Don’t say things like that about yourself. You’re in your early twenties, and one guy isn’t the end all be all. He fucked up, but that doesn’t mean its the end for you. Guys are dumb sometimes, and they don’t commit to thinking of the long term very often, but there’s still so much time left Y/N, you have so much time to meet someone, fall in love, get married, do whatever your heart wants.”

“I just feel like it was a waste of five years.” 

“Five years ago what were you doing?” Jisung turns to you, as you answer. 

“I was back in Toronto.”

“Were you happy?” 

“Not really.”

“Why are you here?” 

“Because Jeonghan wanted me to be closer.” 

“Did you become happier here?” 

“For a while,” 

“Forget about the issues right now, did you become happy?” 

“Yes.” 

“What did you do back home?” 

“What’s up with all the questions Jisung?” he sighs, 

“Just answer.” 

“Nothing. I just worked part time.” 

“What did you do coming here?” 

“I applied for college. Got in as a music major. And graduated,” 

“What else?”

“I made friends, I guess? Got a job? I don’t know Jisung?” You huff now annoyed at the overbearing amount of questions he hurled at you. 

“Was getting your degree a waste of time?” 

“No.”  

“Are your friends a waste of time?” 

“NO! Why woul-” 

“What I’m saying is Y/N, you spent five years working on yourself. You graduated college, in a subject I sincerely hope you liked. You made friends, and began to work. You stabilized your life here. Yeah, a lot of the memories are with him, but it wasn’t a waste of time. Because none of the things you achieved on your own are affected by his absence. Your degree is still yours, your job is still stable, I hope. Your friends are still here.” Jisung hoped he hadn’t overstepped any boundaries as he watched you finish your smoke, he watched your body language closely for any hints of discomfort. 

“Yeah,” you whisper, letting the filter of the cigarette fall to the ground, sizzling and burning out as it hits the snow on the ground, 

“There’s still so much time. Don’t give up on yourself now.” You weakly smile at him as he guides you back inside. ꕀ❀ꕀ

After dinner, Keeho had taken you, Intak and Taeyang home after retrieving your phones from Chan who still sat working in his practice room. Soul, Jiung and Jongseob had decided to cab back to their place, and Jisung patiently waited for Chan to finish up. “So what was it you needed to talk about?” Chan asks as he gathers his things. Placing his laptop in his bag, along with a few pages of sheet music with messily written notes jotted down. 

“It’s a talk we need to have as roommates.” Jisung sighs as he runs his hand through his hair, “I should apologize to you in advance.” 

The drive back from the studio wasn’t very long, but Jisung had to think of a way of bringing up the topic calmly. His roommates wouldn’t refuse he knew that, but he was scared of the pressure of agreeing to this without them. It would be his responsibility to make sure everything went smoothly, and after the interactions he had tonight. He was unsure if he was really a good fit to help. Sure, he could be of some use but the task at hand was large. It truly was a big ask, and he had said yes over some stupid phones. He wondered how Keeho was holding up, knowing his part of the task was probably just as bad. 

ꕀ❀ꕀ

“Y/N, can we talk?” Keeho says a hint of sadness lingering in his words, you nod. Walking over to the couch where he sat as stiff as a rock. 

“What's wrong?” He fiddles with the remote for the tv, the silence in the house was deafening. Would he finally be telling you of the thing Intak had mentioned? Maybe he really was kicking you out. 

“You know, I'm going on tour soon, and I’ll be gone for a few months.” Of course you’d known he’d be leaving, he was excited over the tour. To be able to finally see the fans again, to have them right in his reach, to see them smile and cheer, to hear them sing along to their songs. It was what kept him going his entire time as an Idol. “And, you remember that agreement we had with the company right?” there it is. This is what’s bothering him. 

“What did they ask of you-” Keeho had originally lived in the city when he offered for you to move in, but you couldn’t bring yourself to stay there. The anxiety of the city was too much after the breakup, and so Keeho had gone out of his way to find your current home. He would have to talk to his company about moving an hour from the city, but he promised he’d make it work. After some convincing the company agreed due to them being on a small break, he wouldn’t be needed in the studio as often. They also began helping him with rent but only partially but they’d only allow him to be away until his lease ended, and when the lease ended, he’d be expected to move closer to the city for work. Especially during comeback months. oh god. The lease. “Is the lease-” he nods softly, letting his head fall. 

“It ended two days ago.” 

“We should have been looking for a new place Kee, how much time do we have” 

“So.” he sighs, “We actually should start packing tomorrow, and then I’ll be storing some of my things with the boys for a bit while the company prepares the apartment for us, but it won’t be ready until I get back; which is why they thought now would be the best timing. Since I wouldn’t be here anyways-” 

“Okay, so should I start looking for a room?” 

“You have one set up already, I worked that out earlier.” 

“Earlier?” 

“Jisung,” he pauses, taking a large breath in before finally spitting out what he wanted to say “Offered to take you in with his roommates.” 

“What.” You stood there in shock, why would Jisung have offered you the place? How long had this been planned for? Had he asked when you were outside smoking? Is that why Jisung came to find you? ‘If I agree to your favor?’ Jisung's words rang through your head, and your head shot up as if you’d had some kind of epiphany. “You want me to stay with a stranger? Was that the favor you asked of him, Kee?” he nodded, offering no other explanation. “No, I’m not intruding on some random person's life for this, not happening Kee, I’ve got enough to deal with I don’t want to be thrown into some new place wi-” your eyes stung as the tears began to well, you could hardly speak without choking on your words. “No, Just No.” You had only a few days to pack up, a few stupid days to accept the fact that your comfort place, your home was going to be taken away from you, a few god damned days until your best friends leave for their tour leaving you all alone. And he wanted you to process all of that while staying in a house full of strangers? Absolutely the fuck not.

Tag List: @g4m3girl @channiesbub thank you for letting me tag you ;3

[sams-venting]

Previous anons are continuing to make assumptions about people and dragging things out again like one of the other anons was advising people to STOP doing.

What good is pointing fingers and blaming people now when doing so caused this whole entire mess with Lux and Biased-tsams-confessions where y’all were shitting on and making up lies about the “big blogs” because you misinterpreted their intentions and ran with the lies that Biased pushed.

Y’all complain and say the big blogs gotta apologize and take responsibility for shit, but what about all of you and Biased dragging in random big artists who had nothing to do with what was going on just because they interacted with a post? Pixel Chills runs a small business and could have sued for libel and slander over what happened but instead chose to just bring awareness to the harassment and help expose the truth of what they went through instead.

And then y’all turn around and take issue with their doing so when none of this would have happened if some people, a very SPECIFIC one mind you as they are known to go into people’s inboxes, deciding to go around warning people over other uses over the slightest offense. Full on name dropping blogs, exposing their PERSONAL accounts unrelated to FNaF or SAMS, and even turning on some of the people they tried to “warn” when that person attempted to correct and explain how they got their info wrong and claiming they were in support of whatever narrative they had spun in their head.

That same person had attempted to submit a list of FIFTY PLUS PEOPLE to Biased, which thankfully they rejected, just for interacting with the post. The same thing a lot of you complain got you on the temporary list found on Alex’s doc that was taken down before any of you received harassment (because I checked in on all of your blogs for a couple weeks after the fact when I initially saw it out of concern. None of you got any sort of harassment at all like one anon previously claimed. I only saw it after the podcast episode and even then people unrelated to the doc were getting harassed).

And another thing I don’t understand: why was it when the doc on Lux came out from his victims who learned about what was going on with him were you all quick to blame shippers and the big blogs for the new doc? It very clearly stated it was by the victims, most of them still minors, but I saw so many claiming otherwise and more recently saw someone telling the creators of that second doc to “grow up” cause they “were adults”.

But they aren’t adults.

The people who made that doc are Lux’s victims, NOT the big blogs.

All of you claim to support victims, but then when actual victims come out and call out their abuser wish evidence you dismiss it in favor of demonizing the popular people ended up reblogging it for awareness but had nothing to do with its creation.

I tried telling Biased that initially but my ask about that got deleted as they were more willing to believe and spread the narrative that it WAS made by them.

Anyway, my point:

Biased-Tsams-Confessions has not apologized for any of the false allegations and lies they spread while the big blogs have more than once.

And can we PLEASE just fucking move on already?

Opinion in tags.

[someinstant]

16, 18, and 19 for the A03 wrap asks!

Hello, hello, sorry for being so slow to respond to your ask! I've been meaning to get to this, but it's not the sort of thing I like to do on a phone, and I've been avoiding my computer during this holiday break (except for writing and such) so that I don't do silly things like open my work email or do any lesson plannings while I'm off from school.

But! I have the time and the bandwidth this evening, so I'll go ahead and do this now!

16. What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag?

I'm really inconsistent with my Additional Tags on AO3, honestly. I tend to be one of those folks who just tags characters and pairings and big genres or tropes, and possibly things like violence or content warnings. Other than that, I don't do a lot of additional tagging? But I think my favorite additional tag I used on AO3 this year was "Rampant backstory speculation that will likely be undone in future episodes but I'm okay with that." Because that is what happens when you're writing during a season of episodic television instead of after the fact.

18. The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?

This is going to be so unsatisfactory, but-- none, really? I don't really think of it as having trouble writing a character, honestly. The trouble comes in writing something that isn't true to a character, or doesn't make sense for the character's understanding of a situation. I've definitely had trouble writing scenes before, or figuring out how to resolve a situation, but generally if I just think, "Well, what's the natural way for this person to feel about this situation? What would they say? What would they do? What are they noticing?," I find that I know the answers to those questions. So the issue it's so much having difficulties writing a character-- it's finding that the situation I've written is inconsistent with the honest portrayal of that character and their reality. And so long as I'm willing to delete the stuff that doesn't fit and move with the internal logic of the characters and their world, I can find my way out.

That said, I had such fun writing Clem and Cassian and Maarva. They're probably the easiest, most natural-feeling characters I wrote all year. I think one of my favorite bits of character-building where everything just flowed and felt right was the bit in It's the same old theme where Cass has just gotten into a fight at school. I felt like I understood a hell of a lot about those three characters in that passage, and I'm really proud of it. (And yes, I know it's a controversial take in ANDOR-fandom, but: I find Maarva fascinating, and I am going to write about her a lot, because it's so complicated and dense and I eat that shit up. YUM.)

19. What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

Eh, I dunno! For all that I've read a ton of it, I really haven't written much in the way of direct Jyn/Cassian romance-- my only other ROGUE ONE fic previous to this year alluded to a Jyn/Cassian relationship, but it was in the past and never onscreen, as it were-- and I think I'd like to see if I can find my way into writing something that lets me dig into that in a way that feels earned and meaningful enough for me to be content. And while I am MASSIVELY uninterested in paying any attention to ship wars or any of that nonsense, I could definitely see myself writing about Cassian's relationship with Melshi, or another male character-- because he does read as bi to me, and I'm interested in how he relates to men vs. women in the show, and what that means in terms of desire and its expression.* Honestly, my feelings about pairings (or moresomes! let's not be limiting!) is: whatever, man. I like what I like, I write what I want, and y'all should do the same. This is how we build a fandom that is low drama, which is all that I want.

--

*Okay, I'm going to ramble a bit here about something that I've been considering wrt Cassian and desire, okay? Okay. So: has anyone really grappled with what it means that Cassian was a thirteen-year-old boy who was incarcerated for most of his mid-teens? Prisons aren't exactly known as locations with a great deal of respect for bodily autonomy, and the Empire and most of the Core worlds seems to have a strong heteronormative traditionalism to them-- so it seems to me that if you were a boy who might be discovering that you're attracted sometimes to other boys, Sipo would not have been a kind place. And if you take that into consideration with how aggressive Cassian can get when some men get into his physical space (think about Taramyn, and Cassian's sharp, "Don't touch me"), versus how willing he is to be in close physical proximity to women-- I dunno, man. Something happened there, and it wasn't good. What I'm wondering is if Cassian desires both men and women (and all the spectrums beyond, perhaps), but feels less safe with men unless he really knows them. Because the way Cass relates to that unwelcome touch doesn't seem to be an expression of performative hypermasculinity, or anything like it-- Cass is more than willing to touch men, to hug them deeply, and let himself receive physical affection from them. Brasso and Pegla and Melshi all hug him, and he lets himself be vulnerable in all of those circumstances. But I think it happens less often with men for Cassian, because he feels at far greater risk.

[gear-project]

guilty gear strive feels like its receiving a good deal of criticism lately gameplay and design-wise, and the net code problem definitely doesn't help. with new games like sf6, mk12, and tekken 8 on the horizon, fighting games are taking steps forward as a medium. do you think guilty gear will motivate to evolve via patches and new content moving forward, or will it end up falling by the wayside?

As I personally see it, from my point of view that is, Guilty Gear Strive was built by an entirely new generation of game developers compared to past games, so you can't really make a strong comparison of this "version" of GG to previous iterations without taking that in to consideration.

In some ways, this version of GG is highly experimental compared to past iterations.

Guilty Gear Xrd, even with its limitations still BASED ITSELF on previous games, not just in frame data, but in design and mechanics.

It built itself off what existed, so it had a firm foundation to go on.

For Strive, while there are some things that are similar to previous titles, has thrown out the idea of "building up on what came before" and instead making something that is both new, simple, and engaging for those who are unaccustomed to fighting games.

In terms of emphasis, the game does well to show what can be done to make a game easy to understand AND play…

What it lacks in complexity and single-player engagement are still issues they are working the kinks out of, as they have said in previous Developer's Backyard entries and Interviews (see the GG Interviews and Developer's Backyard tags for details).

In terms of netcode and network issues… there were a lot of unforeseen events that occurred, but they are doing their best to mitigate this for the sake of all players who support their game.

In some ways, this game was FAR better managed than previous titles for that very reason… so even if there are netcode problems, the fact they are managing it instead of struggling with crunch and delaying things (or ignoring issues altogether), PROVES they still have a potentially capable team to work with on future content.

I want to remind you all the importance your voice has in impacting the growth of Strive as a game.

The role fans have to play in all this is to PROVIDE CONSTRUCTIVE FEEDBACK and remind them what sort of games we are aiming for!

This isn't just a game meant solely for Tournaments of E-sports... it's a game meant to engage both new and old fans alike...

It's also a cross-platform crossplay access game... so the intent is that everyone can access the game no matter their platform of choice (but of course, that comes with technical hurdles they themselves have to overcome).

From my point of view, I still believe this game has the potential for growth and development... rebalance of the roster not being the LEAST of what they are capable of!

There's lots of things they plan to add... and although I cannot see what the future holds, at the very least, this game SEEKS to be a LOT of things that we've hoped for from previous GG titles...

Again, in terms of single player content, I don't think it's that fair to compare it to games like Street Fighter 6 and Mortal Kombat 11, which had much longer development cycles AND RESOURCES to work from.

ARC System Works is actually much smaller than other big name fighting game developers, believe it or not... so just getting as far as they have is a REALLY BIG DEAL.

Even for upcoming hopeful games like Tekken 8 and Mortal Kombat 12, you can't really predict how they will handle single-player features, as even Tekken 7 struggled to give much in the way of content to players who don't play competitively online "as much".

At the very least, Guilty Gear Strive has ALREADY made a name for itself as a game that can be recognized by mainstream gamers the world over... and that is saying something that no previous GG title accomplished...

So you could say that this Guilty Gear title STRIVES to reach the Sky, in terms of the limits of what a GG game is capable of...

And if you're gonna reach for the Sky... it should be HIGH...

[randomingoftherandomness]

I have mixed attitude towards c-dramas, i don't really like them, however there are such gems of a pairings sometimes - like Jiang Cheng and wwx, or scorpion and his yifu. They often have intrigueing premise and idea, and absolutely DON'T follow it through. The only chinese drama i enjoyed throughly, without ignoring a mess (because there wasn't any mess) is "Ruyi's love in the palace". It was amazing not because of brilliant acting, or costumes, even tho it did have all of that. It was amazing because every word had a weight, and every action had a consequence, every issue was addressed, and there wasn't even a hint of 'modern values'. characters felt real. real people of different time. And human feelings are universal. 99% of ancient puppets genre c-dramas fail to deliver that. I know they aren't historical they're fantasy at best and idol cosplay show at worst, but they don't even try to create athmosphere of 'old times'. I guess they really are made for teens, but when i was a teen i also couldn't watch it without cringing - they were too juvenile for my taste. They don't make me care about anyone as a viewer - any wounded will heal, any thousand years old evil will be easily defeated by rag tag team of boy band members, they bleeding from their mouths and go about their day. They constantly talk about immense sacrifices like waiting for a lover for billion years, meditating for another billion, but it's so unrealistic and impossible to take seriously especially when characters never deny themselves anything even on small-scale everyday level. 1)

MJTY is also guilty of this. FL is supposed to be villain protagonist yet they're so afraid for her to be treated like a villain. When she gets discovered her targets start defending and saving her? This craziness alone turned me off of this show. Yet GSJ and GYZ get accused of all crimes for breathing. They're doing and saying the right thing in majority of scenes but everyone looks at them like they are demons. The director loves BL and incest (considering his previous works) so it's given that shangzhi is his faves. So evil angle they get probably is for fetish fuel reasons, to make their hotness too hot to handle. And still, i hated that. They're treated like enemies in their own family for working hard on its prosperity and actual enemies get love and protection. YWS never openly renounced her evil ways, never asked for forgiveness, she just acted like nothing happened, her spy and killer nature is swept under the rug. It's a big fail of the show. All other characters are just fools who want to destroy their own clan. That's what it looks like. Now, as i gather from weibo, they're testing the waters for second season and milking the second cp. Obviously, there's nothing more stupid than to make qian someone's housewife, and as if shangjue will bring home such devious and morally corrupt person to play happy family with (the very home she worked hard to destroy, to the people she worked very hard to hurt). That's murder and disrespect of their respective characters. Betraying everyone and yourself for insane "love" is a good plot for a tragedy, but it has to be perfectly written. there wasn't love between these characters and they're both level-headed people so logical possibility of that storyline is zero. But they will be molded into meaningless happy end romance, with everyone cheering. In my opinion, the ending of MJTY is satisfying as it is. Does anyone really need baby drama and love brained shangjue? That's the opposite of what he's like and why he attracted fans in the first place 2)

My brain is empty because wow that is one wall of text lol

I'm not saying that this is a 'reason' or an 'excuse' as to why certain promising premise falls through in cdramaland, but honestly speaking, censors and cash play a VERY big role in what ends up on screens and this isn't something we can deny. How many shows and movies have filmed scenes/scripts/sequences/storylines that were completely dropped at the Nth hour for "reasons"? Profit pays a big role in what gets aired, and from the get-go, cdramas aren't the places to be if you're looking for morally grey/villain MCs that allowed to be morally grey/villainous/unrepentant (or in YWS's case, allowed to work for redemption). That's not the way it works. Which sucks, admittedly if you (like me) enjoy that kinda of stuff.

In response to your statements regarding 'Does anyone really need baby drama and love brained shangjue?', I may be kicking the hornet's nest here, but just as I was the intended audience for Word of Honor, I am not the target audience for The Untamed. And that's okay :) Your Mileage Will Vary when it comes to what's 'good' and what's 'bad'. Someone will enjoy the baby drama and love brained shangjue, though that someone will not be me and I am thinking it won't be you too.

And again, that's okay. As long as you're not going around being a dick to people who would and will enjoy that content, you'll be fine.

After all, as I've heard said by some people who say it with their whole chest with no regard to how entitled it can come across, variety is the spice of life :)

[ailtrahq]

Richard Ma, the CEO and founder of Quantstamp, stands at the forefront of the cryptocurrency auditing landscape. With his firm recognized as one of the leading smart contract auditing entities, Ma’s perspective offers invaluable insights into the evolving challenges and paradigms of crypto safety. In an interview with CryptoPotato that was held at Token2049 in Singapore, Ma delves deep into the current limitations of smart contract auditing, the varied nature of crypto hacks beyond just smart contracts, and offers a discerning guide on assessing the credibility of security audits. Richard Ma’s journey in the world of cryptocurrency commenced with a direct and personal brush with its vulnerabilities. “When I discovered Ethereum… I invested in the DAO (2016). A few weeks later, it got hacked with over $50 million taken. That’s why I launched Quantstamp.” This unfortunate encounter transformed Ma from an investor to a luminary intent on fortifying the digital finance landscape. Richard Ma, CEO at Quantstamp Not Enough: The Limits of Smart Contract Auditing The world of crypto is rapidly expanding, with projects mushrooming every day. Investors and users are constantly on the lookout for projects that not only promise high returns but are also safe. Here is where the ‘audited by’ tag comes into the picture. Projects promote this tag as a badge of safety and assurance. But is it enough? “Yeah, audits are definitely not enough,” Ma begins, “and just saying ‘audited by’ is also not enough because about a third of all the projects that are audited, they don’t fix some serious issues they have.” He elaborated on the gap between what the auditors suggest and what the projects choose to implement. It was a striking insight that although auditors could highlight vulnerabilities, the onus to rectify them falls on the projects. But the concerns don’t end there. “For a lot of projects, they’ll release a lot of things without getting audits and then wait until they have a bunch of updates and then get it audited all at once. And so that time in between audits, that could be risky.” Ma exemplified this by citing Nomad Bridge, among others, where small edits made between audits became the focal point of exploitation. From MT. Gox: Hacks – Well Beyond Smart Contracts Ma’s depth of knowledge in crypto was evident as he delved into the multifaceted nature of hacks in the crypto space. “Many of the biggest hacks in crypto, they’re not smart contract hacks. They’re exchange hacks or thefts from custody providers. One of the earliest big hacks was Mt. Gox, and that was an exchange exploit.” Further widening the horizon of the conversation, he touched upon the threats that lay outside the realm of smart contract vulnerabilities. “There’s a lot of ways to hack those exchanges, custody providers. And also, people using Metamask often lose their private keys.” Exploited Despite Being Audited: Determining Audit Credibility When asked about the credibility of audits, Ma’s insights were keen and thought-provoking. “The best way to get a feeling for the credibility of the audit is to simply take five of the previous audit reports and read through them.” A good audit, in Ma’s perspective, is not one that merely points out the common issues but goes into the depth of a project’s design and functionality. He emphasized the unique circumstances of each project. “For every single project, there are always some design considerations, and there are always some unique circumstances where in the audit report it should be explained.” Over 700 Audits Completed Quantstamp’s trajectory under Ma’s leadership highlights the importance of understanding and addressing these challenges head-on. Having performed over 700 audits and serving 600 active customers, Quantstamp is leading the charge to secure the future of digital assets. “I think it’s important to remember that security is not a one-time thing but a continuous process. We need to evolve, adapt, and be vigilant at all times.

At Quantstamp, we’re committed to that vision,” said Richard Ma, hinting at the bigger picture of crypto safety in the coming years. Source

[vikith21]

Okay I was just going to put this in the tags but I have so much to say tags arent enough; its too much for the tags.

So the previous post I just reblogged is about explaining why you hurt someone and like how

1. its not an excuse, the person may just genuinely want to apologize for having hurt you with the explanation to clarify intent and communicate well with you

2. the explanation can be comoforting; the person meant well but hurt you and is sorry

I want to point out whats briefly mentioned but is where people take issue: when people explain as an excuse, or essentially as a way of going "oh its not my fault" and "apologize" without taking responsibility for their part in hurt you, on purpose or not. Thats the bullshit. But genuine explanation for the sake of clarity and communication is fine; theres nothing wrong with explaining, but unfortunately a lot of people have gotten the "apology" explanation where really the person is making an excuse or going "its not my fault", so you have to be clear. You have to be upfront and direct about how you are 1. sorry and 2. explaining for clarity so you both understand the situation and again emphasize that youre sorry, youre just trying to communicate well, so you both understand..... and you have to understand if the other person doesnt want the explanation. Like I said too many people get the excuse bullshit not genuine communication, so they dont care about why. Im one of those people; I dont care about why because for me its not comforting; the fact that you hurt me and didnt mean to doesnt change anything, I just want you to not do it again. So for people like me I suggest patience and understanding we might not be able to communicate super well, and, if you really must give an explanation, ask first, get permission, and then keep it brief and emphasize youre sorry, even if it wasnt your fault. Be clear and concise and understanding and, hopefully, we'll communicate well back, deal with whatever is going on and/or what has made us respond negatively to explanations, and maybe it wont be so big a problem in the future. And of course to people like me, who dont want the explanation at all or generally have some issue with explanations ebcause theyve been used an excuse or such in the past: some people really are just trying to be clear to communicate well so everyone understands what went on, to say sorry and also, maybe, prevent what happened from happening again. Be patient with them and kind to yourself; communicate your past etc. whatever you feel comfortable doing/is relevent that youre comfortable sharing. Its hard and awkward and communication can suck, but some people really are trying to do it well by explaining what happened as they say theyre sorry. Its okay. Good luck all and sorry for the shit format, the post got wonky for some reason.

[jackzzgbaf]

Six of the Best Podcasts Available on YouTube

Whether you're looking for new YouTube content, or just want to listen to a great podcast, you've come to the right place! Here are six of the best podcasts available on YouTube.

TubeTalk

Whether you are a YouTube creator looking for tips and strategies or you're just interested in how YouTube works, you can benefit from listening to TubeTalk. It's one of the most respected podcasts in the online video industry. Each episode tackles a new topic. Guests on the show include YouTubers, experts, and other experts in the video creation space. They take you deep into topics such as how to make money with your channel, how to build your audience, and how to get your videos noticed.

You can download the podcast on Apple and Spotify. The episodes are uploaded once a week. Each one has a unique flavour. Each podcast is interesting to listen to. It's an excellent way to start your day.

In the past two years, the Pop Culture Commentary podcast has featured offbeat anecdotes, personal stories, and commentary on the world of pop culture. Its last episode was a bit of a departure from its previous format, but it still featured successful online creators.

Another YouTube podcast is designed around issues and trends on the platform. Its creators, Aden Matthews and Zach Snyder, have worked together to develop a show that focuses on the steps you can take to become a better YouTuber.

Dropped Frames

Streamers and Twitch users have a new podcast to check out. It's called Dropped Frames, and it's hosted by Playground Games. The company has a solid pedigree, with several of the biggest names in the gaming industry on board.

The show will feature a handful of eminently interesting guests including John Paul McDaniel, aka Zekiel III, and ShannonZKiller. A few of the big wigs have made appearances on the show before. Ezekiel III, for example, has been on several official Twitch events, and has racked up 190k followers on the service. He's also been known to host the official Twitch "Meet and greet" and has a YouTube channel with over 10 million subscribers.

The show isn't a complete slam dunk, but it's still a good time to catch up on the latest and greatest in the gaming industry. The latest episode will also cover a few other topics, including the upcoming Halo Infinite, a game that has received a lot of attention during the Xbox/Bethesda E3 presentation. In addition to being the first game to feature a cross-platform multiplayer mode, it's the only Xbox One game that allows players to compete against each other.

True Geordie & Laurence

Previously known as Football Fan 533, True Geordie is an English YouTuber. He hosts a weekly football livestream on his channel called The Kick Off. He also produces a podcast called True News. He is often accompanied by his co-host Laurence Mckenna.

The two make fun of each other's fashion sense and mock stereotypical ideas of female gossip. They have both been criticised for their comments. They have even been banned from streaming on Twitch.

The True Geordie & Laurence podcast on YouTube features a range of interesting guests. Their interviews are often enlightening. The podcast is popular with viewers. The content of each episode is driven by viewer demand. The podcast also reviews popular trending issues. It has featured Robbie Williams, Ricky Gervais and more.

A lot of the time, the language that True Geordie uses has a strong Geordie accent. He also makes use of derogatory adjectives. His speech has interruptions and swearing.

In addition, he makes use of tag questions. These questions suggest approval-seeking and inferiority. These types of comments are often used to prompt the conversational flow.

Trash Taste

Several of the YouTube stars have produced podcasts, many of which provide entertaining or useful information. The Trash Taste podcast is among the best of the crop. Some episodes are available on YouTube and Spotify. The podcast is hosted by the likes of Garnt, Gigguk and Connor and they are joined by special guests from time to time. Trash Taste has reached an international audience and is one of the few podcasts to make the move to Japan.

The Trash Taste is a podcast about anime, manga and other otaku culture. Aside from the regular podcasts, they have produced some specials that are only available on YouTube. These include cycling 70km through Hiroshima prefecture, the best otaku video game to ever hit the gaming console and an impressive tidbit about the history of Japanese cars. The most interesting part is that these episodes are recorded in real time from the studio's servers.

While the Trash Taste is not the first anime podcast, it certainly has been the most popular. It is a collaborative project between Anime YouTubers and GeeXPlus note, which is a media company based in Australia. The Trash Taste has two main channels, one is a playlist of their most recent episodes and a second channel which is a playlist of highlights from the show.

SuperMegaCast

Unlike some of the more traditional YouTube channels, SuperMegaCast has been around since the beginning. In fact, it is the longest running YouTube series to date.

The show features celebrity guests and off-the-cuff opinions on all things from the latest TV shows to upcoming film releases. Having said that, a look at the ratings on YouTube's main site reveals that the podcast is only one of a handful of YouTubers to get the nod. This is probably because the show's creators have been able to keep the quality up to snuff.

The show also has a socially conscious bent, with merchandise printed on a variety of quality products and designed by independent artists. It's also one of the few YouTubers to have a merchandise store. With a catalog of over 300 items to choose from, you're sure to find something to suit your tastes. The best part is that every purchase puts money back into the pocket of the artist.

In addition to the aforementioned merchandise, the show also has a weekly podcast. In the same way that the YouTube platform is home to a bevy of up and coming talent, the podcast is a haven for veteran producers and celebrities.

Hannahlyze

Whether you're into your life, your relationships, or your mental health, there's a podcast that will suit you. If you're looking for a laugh, or want to learn more about self-help, you'll love a podcast hosted by Hannah Hart.

Hannah Hart is an actress, musician, and best friend. In her debut podcast, she and her friend Hannah Gelb tackle topics such as self-help fads, mental health, and love. They try out various self-help techniques and share their results with listeners.

You can listen to Hannahlyze This on YouTube. Each episode is about learning how to be your best self. The podcast has new episodes every Thursday. They also have a Patreon page where you can contribute. If you subscribe to their monthly pledges, you will receive extra rewards, such as a monthly live stream, a handwritten quote from Hannahs, and behind-the-scenes content. If you're interested in supporting the show, you can pay $15 a month, which includes a live stream. You'll also receive an original doodle and a behind-the-scenes video.

One of the most popular podcasts in the U.K. is the Brady Haran and CGP Grey podcast. They discuss the differences between hosts, vexillology, and other topics that are interesting to them. They've recorded over 128 episodes and have become one of the leading podcasts in the U.K.

Blackb0nd & Hard8

During the late summer months, YouTube started rolling out its dedicated Explore page. This page allows users to see a list of podcasts on the platform, including some that they might not otherwise have access to. The video thumbnails are typical and not terribly impressive, but they show what's up. The pages aren't as clear as one would hope. Some users have already been able to access the hub, but others are still waiting for the opportunity. This is a great feature for those of us who don't have access, but it's also not something that's available to everyone.

In addition to the usual podcasts, there are some interesting ones from other gaming communities. One of these is the Corporate Slave Awards, a satirical awards ceremony hosted by BlackB0nd. The event has garnered a good deal of backlash from Superbros and the like. However, it's pretty entertaining.

Another noteworthy podcast is the one hosted by BrokengamezHD. This is a bit of a joke, as it's mostly about casual multiplayer and souls games. The host lacks organization and slanders the game that takes skill.

[mikesavagenewcanaan]

Mike Savage New Canaan Muscle Cars: Old Generation or New?

Ford was the first of the Big 3 American auto manufacturers to present a cars and truck that would bring them back to a time when they was among the leaders in the automotive world. Chrysler has actually revealed that they prepare to be the following as well as GM has unveiled prepare for a retro automobile also. Ford had actually originally done this retro thing through the Ford Thunderbird but that was ruled out a "muscle cars and truck" back in the muscle mass vehicle period. Chrysler has revived the Charger name but it looks absolutely nothing like the Dodge Charger of the late 60's and also early 70's. GM restored the GTO name but once again, it looked absolutely nothing like the previous GTO's.

Ford was the initial to bring a car back that really looks like a previous version in the Mustang. The new Mustangs resemble a pervious Mustang from the muscle mass automobile period. Chrysler followed suit with their statement of reviving the Opposition, which in my viewpoint looks even more like the Opposition than the Mustang does. Not wanting to be omitted, GM has revealed they prepare to revive the Camaro. Their Camaro very much looks like the 69 Camaro which was and still is a very popular body design among Camaro enthusiasts. I still think the Opposition most resembles its designated target.

Mike Savage New Canaan

Ford has actually done a suitable task pricing their Mustang. You can get a well outfitted Mustang GT hardtop for appropriate around $30,000. This is reasonably valued in today's market. The various other 2 have actually not gotten their own to the showroom yet so there is no way to learn about prices however they encounter an obstacle that Ford does not have. Chrysler has the Viper as well as the Ram SRT-10 that additionally certify in the performance market. They can not value the Challenger also carefully to those versions because people would probably invest the money for the greater efficiency of the 10 cylinder lorries. GM is confronted with a similar issue because of the Corvette. The Corvette was just restyled as well as is also higher carrying out contrasted to the previous model. Their Z06 model now boasts an impressive 505 HP. All the testimonials I have actually kept reading the new model rave about this cars and truck. Plainly GM needs to value the new Camaro effectively when and if they in fact do produce it. The name will certainly not suffice to market it for an extended period of time. As soon as the initial excitement wanes it will certainly be a flop if not priced straight.

What interests me is since the Big Three are losing market share and also company is clearly not what it as soon as was they are not just altering most of their vehicles yet they are attempting to return right into their glory days. As an example, Ford got rid of their incredibly popular Taurus version as well as replaced it with the Ford 500. Chrysler introduced an entire brand-new styling within the last number of years. GM is now bring out cars and trucks that a lot more look like the Toyota models. I have some pals that allow right into muscle mass automobiles and also the brand-new Mustang, Opposition, as well as Camaros have actually shown up in some discussions. None have actually said they would also take into consideration the $30,000 or even more price tag that these autos will certainly have as soon as they hit the showroom floors. For $30,000 a person could buy a Camry, or the Maxima. The Maxima is a really high performing lorry that likewise features the included reliability.

Mike Savage New Canaan

I do not know what it will consider the Big 3 to actually turn points around but I really like the appearances of the more recent generation muscular tissue cars. I think they were sharp automobiles when they first appeared and also they are still really sharp. Hopefully they perform in addition to they look and also they make their ancestors proud.

[aetheri-system]

At the request of @queerautism, we’re gonna share about our system in the uniquly plural tag!

theres a lot here…

- Although our system has around 120 members, there are currently only two members who actually front (Rosie & Lyn) most live in the headspace full time

- The headspace is unique on its own!! Headmates who live there full time claim it feels like a vivid dream, which i find hard to believe that our mind can support 120ish vivid dreams at the same time but you know what brains are wack

- Oh! and the headspace is HUUGE! Its all on the back of these giant living animal islands (There’s a Deer, a Starfish, and a Scorpion currently, plus a little jellyfish for the fronters). I will infodump about the headspace someday.

- Our system probably formed because of neurodiversity and likely has something to do with our autism, but we have since had system members form due to stress/trauma, manually created members, and even members who claim to be from other worlds

- Headmates can merge (fuse) and unmerge at will (it does take some practice though) although afaik nobody really does this in the headspace.

- Ohh! We have a surprising amount of memory issues for a primarily endogenic system! We fall somewhere in between monoconcious and multiconcious (There’s a distinct difference between switches combined with a somewhat hazier recollection of what the previous fronter did).

(But with just the two of us fronting, we’ve gotten to the point where memory barriers have gone away, although i imagine this would change if someone else entirely fronted)

- There’s a little “doorway” in our system where you can allegedly astral project yourself into another world… i’m a little skeptical of this personally but there’s no harm in believing in it… and its a pretty big deal for some people in the headspace, so i try to be respectful when speaking about it.

- I’ve seen a lot of systems who struggle with figuring out who’s fronting, but we always know who we are at any given time, (probably because 90% of the time our switches are controlled)

- Despite our Massive headspace, we absolutely suck at visualization. We can’t currently visualise the headspace from the front, but when we can, it’s extremely blurry.

there is absolutely more but i think this is long enough lol… i think we just work differently than most systems i’ve encountered (which is swag tbh i love learning about new experiences)