#just sad at this point. absolute despair. ‘consistent suffering loaded with hope’ she said. lmaoooool
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im actually fucked like for real. lol
#purrs#just got out of therapy and my god. the way i am in SO MANY situations that are causing me profound suffering. biggest takeaway from tonight#is that i have this thing in me that keeps hoping in the most FUTILE situations that actually are not going to change lmao like it is 100%#guaranteed i am not going to get the outcome i need and yet i keep hoping i will when there is ZERO chance my needs will be met. like it’s#just sad at this point. absolute despair. ‘consistent suffering loaded with hope’ she said. lmaoooool#delete later#im glad i have the capacity to hope. but at this point the hope is just hurting me. it’s a wonder it hasn’t been beaten out of me yet like#it seriously shouldn’t be there. the objects are IMMOVABLE. by hoping like this i am hurting myself. lawl 🤸🏻♀️
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