#just my feelings surrounding that theory

[cheese-water]

Out of all the themes and messages that surrounded Generation Loss, the theory I can never fully immerse myself in is the one about the dehumanization of content creators. Don’t get me wrong. I’m well aware of its confirmation and canonization by Ranboo and other cast members, and I don’t think that anyone who believes or enjoys this concept is wrong for doing so. What am I, a hypocrite lmao? No, it’s that for me personally, it’s hard to view Genloss in that context without feeling weird, I guess. Here, let me give you an example:

Let’s look at the character of Sneeg in this mindset, since we have two episodes' worth of content from him to analyze. Right as he’s introduced, we learn Sneeg tried to complete Slime’s trials, failed, and was stuck in a cage while not being particularly angry about it. It's as if it’s understandable that he’s trapped, that it was his fault, and he knows it. And then, for the rest of the series, he acts as Ranboo’s funny sidekick, doing everything he can to get Ranboo, not himself, to the end. The only time Sneeg’s character shows any agency for himself is in episode 2, when he’s wearing the hat and, after reassuring Ranboo that he’ll come back for him, tries to escape the mall. But he gets caught, is forcefully brainwashed, and returns to his cynical yet helpful self again. So within the context of the audience's perception of CCs, Sneeg’s character only serves as a benefit to Ranboo, and without him (locked up in a cage), Sneeg is nothing, worthless even. Which to me makes the role feel so... icky.

Honestly, that’s probably why I don’t enjoy the dehumanizing cc theory all that much. It never fails to make me viscerally uncomfortable whenever I think about it for too long. “Wow, Genloss doesn’t have a happy ending and is supposed to make you uncomfortable? No shit sherlock.”Yeah, yeah, I know, but that interpretation is just too real for me. With the changing one’s perception leaves them with no choice or time loop theories, we can absolve ourselves of blame, since this is what Showfall wanted to happen. It's still not reassuring, but I’m used to not having control over what happens, be it social, politically, economically, etc. But by viewing the characters as their cc counterparts, their pain becomes so personal that we have no one to blame but ourselves for the suffering they endure. And while I know I wasn’t at fault for their trauma (I was a lurker on twitch, twitter, and tumblr at Ranboo’s "peak", so I couldn’t share my opinion even if I wanted to), I still feel a sense of responsibility knowing that I can’t do anything about it now. That I don’t know how to make it all better. I can’t stop random people from harassing Niki in the past, but I’m still ashamed that it happened at all. It’s like secondhand embarrassment cranked up to 1000%.

I want to watch Lex Cat’s video essay surrounding this topic so badly, but I have to wait until I’m in a good enough headspace because I know it will leave me feeling utterly desolate after. I haven't watched Ranboo’s playthrough of Killer Frequency, but I’ve been told that chat was a mess of people trying to help and others lying to him (telling them they missed something even though they hadn’t, saying that he picked the wrong options when they were right, etc.) and I believe them 100%. I know this because I was there for the late-night mining streams, having to sit through chat screaming DIAMONDS at Ranboo just for shits and giggles. No wonder Ranboo doesn’t trust us to pick the correct combination code for the mall exit when all we have done before is try to fuck him over.

If we choose to believe that Generation Loss was about the dehumanization of content creators by their fanbase, then all this tells Ranboo is that we, his audience, have learned nothing. If they view Generation Loss as Ranboo’s cry for help, a last-ditch effort to change their community, pleading, begging us to see him as a human being and not just a commodity, then why are we choosing to treat him exactly the same as before?

Maybe that’s why voting to kill Ranboo was so easy for me. I never viewed myself as their judge and jury, glowering over him as I decided his fate. As his blood began to pool beneath him, I felt more akin to his executioner, simply following the orders given from Showfall Media.

Maybe I was wrong to assume everyone felt the same way…

[juaneloriginal]

silly thingy

@blackkatdraws's sillies

[m0rceauuuxxx]

the historical house girlies will really have you thinking a fully wood paneled house is the hottest shit in the world. i don't care for minimal millennial beigecore either but the wood paneling also is not It

[gu6chan]

Just realised

February 2022 - Drakengard 1.3

February 2023 - Drakengard "Magnitude Negative"

February 2024 -

I'm free :')

[untimelyambition]

OHOHOHOHOHO I FUCKING LOVE GENERATION LOSS

[russeliarat]

I won’t lie, I’ve bitched about the issue before but I’m seeing so much TotK hate at the moment and it’s becoming so mentally exhausting to listen to because it’s getting to a point where it’s spilling over into talks about BotW and I need to vent about it. I get that some people are underwhelmed. I get that there’s been so much time between trailers. I get that people are anxious about certain aspects. But I’m just so tired of hearing it because I’m genuinely so happy and excited about TotK because it’s the very first Zelda game I get to buy upon release and play with the rest of the world for once. And the most frustrating part is that every time I talk about it, it feels like people are just pushing me to stop talking about how drained I am hearing it. It’s gotten to the point that I’m thinking about just not interacting with anything TotK related beyond like two streamers and my own playthrough and theories because I’ve become that stressed and upset at the idea of the reaction to the game. It’s the sole reason I’ve stopped writing my TotK AU. It’s the reason I haven’t drawn anything for it in months. I’m just so frustrated that people are setting their expectations so high and expecting a perfect game or that they���re upset that it’s taking so long.  It’s genuinely making me not want to interact in general Zelda and BotW/TotK spaces anymore coz I feel like I just can’t escape it.

[faaun]

whenever i think/talk abt a "you" it's at least 5 different people usually

[atypicalstrong]

HOLD UP. YOU CAN BUY WEED IN KANSAS??? ITS JUST A DIFFERENT NAME OH MY GOD

[bakerysnake]

i love weak hero so much

[mishkakagehishka]

that was me with autism i was like oh i cant say it right... thats a srs thing... it would be rude to self diagnose...... but all my friends were like 'yea u prob have it' and i trusted their word JSKFSLG (and i researched into it and . yea i do most of that)

it def takes a while tho!! u dont have to start saying it right away or bring it up. im sure evryone here tho is super supportive of it!!!! (including me)

Yeah !! A lot of folks here are super nice and supportive about it, i think my main problems are thinking i'd be speaking over folks who "actually" have it and also. Growing up in a "people talk" culture where it's all still very stigmatised👍 that makes me wanna avoid the possibility and go "no, no, it's just my personality"

I'll first get familiarised with saying "i might have adhd" i think...

[bredforloyalty]

the familial unconscious in szondi's fate-analytical psychology is sooooo interesting for me personally. and i should read crime and punishment for sure for sure

[justmossyaps]

it would be nice to have someone in office who is both right and, yknow, a decent person. like these two things do not have to be mutually exclusive

[arolesbianism]

Was going to do some oni file digging but got too distracted playing the actual video game. Anyways look at her <3

[melminli]

Dirty Cash (Money Talks)

summary - you had nothing against your colleague, but you weren't stupid enough to be fooled by his innocent smile and appearance since you knew exactly what kind of corrupt person was hiding behind that costume. after all, you were wearing the same one.

pairing: (gong yoo/ji-cheol) the salesman x fem. recruiter reader

word count: 1.4k

contains: talk about gambling + death and murder, sexual tension?, crack and just evil morals tbh

a/n: i watched maybe the first fifteen minutes or so of bullet train, but i thought of the two funny dudes from it while writing this bcuz their dynamic was funny af. also, i will use the actor's name in this fic since the character itself doesn't really have an official one that was mentioned in the series!

You straightened your tie with your free hand while watching your train approach from the side. The station was always pretty empty at this hour, which saved you the jostling and squeezing as you entered. After that, you sat down comfortably with a light sigh - next to the free seat beside your devilishly handsome colleague. “Are you alright? Don't tell me that you had a exhausting day?” he asked you worriedly with his typical innocent smile on his face but you've known the guy for a while now and you knew exactly how dishonest he sounded right now.

You returned his gaze for a second, uninterested, before turning it back in front of you to observe your surroundings from the window. “Exhausting day? Don't make fun of me or I'll punch you in the face,” you replied monotone and Gong Yoo didn't doubt your statement for a second - or Ji-cheol as you preferred to call him since you weren't a big fan of nicknames. “I had a great time punching those bastards in the face one by one. It feels kinda therapeutic, so I'm actually feeling pretty good right now,” you told him, talking about the subject as if you were talking about the weather.

Your colleague grunted with delight at your good news. “And I would never disagree with you on that.” he said and then just watched your figure silently for a while before speaking up again. “Since you're in such a good mood, would you be willing to play a more private game between the two of us?” he suggested, making you look at him in utter disbelief.

“A private game? With you?” you repeated, amused and laughed in his face. “Hell, no. But don't worry, I'll let you know next time I want to get totally screwed by a freaky pervert,” you added, your voice dripping with sarcasm. Which will be, never.

“Come on, don't be like that,” he asked you sweetly. As sweet as the wolf who pretended to be the mother of the seven little goats before he ate them all one by one. “It's just a tiny, harmless game. It's been so long since we've played anything together.” he complained to you earnestly as if you actually cared, and you didn't.

Yeah, you remembered the last time very clearly, even if you would much rather prefer that you didn't. You hummed. “Is that so? Huh. I mean, it could be because you almost killed me in a fucking game of tic-tac-toe the last time, but that's just a theory.” You said with a shrug, clearly still resenting him for that. However, he just rolled his eyes unaffected by your grudge. “But you didn't, right? It was the other guy who got the bullet in his head.” He replied, not even remembering his name. Not that he had to.

You just glared at him while you rubbed your forehead. “Yeah, maybe. But I'm tired of risking my life just because it makes you horny and you can jerk off to it.” You made your feelings on the matter clear. “You know that the whole living on the edge of death thing isn't really my cup of tea. At least try to understand me a bit here, too.”

I suppose she's not entirely wrong, I could give it a try. I never thought about it like that before, did I? He thought to himself in his head as he ran his tongue over the back of his teeth while he pondered. How selfish of me. “So what exactly do I have to do, to convince you?” He asked you while he already had a few ideas in mind.

You grinned. “You know that very well, don't play dumb.” You demanded as you leaned closer to him so that he could hear what you were singing softly. “Money talks, money talks - dirty cash, I want you, and dirty cash, I need you, oh ~”

He raised an eyebrow, not particularly surprised. “So you want to play for money?” He repeated it, not outright rejecting your request. “Don't you have enough of that already? You're really insatiable when it comes to cash and now you want mine, too?” he joked just to get you worked up.

Though, you didn't get the slightest bit offended by what he said. “Can you ever have enough money? Besides, I'm not forcing you to give it to me, am I?” you said with a smile, already knowing that he would agree to your terms. “But if you want me to play with you, I want eight million won for every round I win.”

She's so greedy for someone who is already more than wealthy. “Aren't you exaggerating a bit? Most people don't earn that much in a month,” he continued his act of - whatever this was - because he just loved arguing with you.

“So? We both have the same salary, I know you can afford it,” you said, holding a hand in the air as soon as you felt that he wanted to stretch this unnecessary conversation even more. “You have to decide now what you want to do or I withdraw my proposal again.”

Gong Yoo closed his mouth and started grinning even wider. “You don't even want to know what kind of game I want to play?” he asked curiously, nodding and accepting whatever you wanted as soon as he saw that you actually weren't interested. You couldn't even imagine how gladly he gave in to you at this moment. “All right, I agree with your request.”

You stood up with your briefcase in hand after your station was announced. “Good. Text me when you have something in mind, I'll be there as long as it fits timewise.”

Your colleague continued to watch you with a look on his face that used to make you more than just uncomfortable back in the day - though, it didn't even bother you in the slightest now. “You don't want to accompany me to the...office?”

You smiled while the train started to slow down. “Au revoir, Ji-cheol.” you just said your goodbye to him and stepped out of the doors. You didn't even spare the poor guy a second glance when he waved his hand at you from the window. She can be so heartless sometimes, he thought to himself, even if you were like this pretty much all the time. I'll have to think of something good to ask for in return should I win. I'm definitely not going to hold back when there's this much money at stake.

You didn't give a second thought to anything as you made your way home after a day's work like any normal citizen would do. However, your steps slowed considerably when you noticed a beggar in your field of vision and even though the rest of the crowd ignored the man and his entire existence, you couldn't help but focus your full attention on him. You looked at your watch, I've been off work for a while now. But even then, you couldn't help but notice that he was one of the people on your list to recruit for the game. He'll still be here tomorrow, but I don't mind another round of Ddakji. I love money more than anything - but I'm not doing this job for only that.

“Excuse me,” you spoke to the man with a polite smile on your face, and he only submissively avoided your gaze as he listened to you. After all, one rarely approached people like him and why would they? He held his cup of loose change out in front of him, probably expecting you to give him a small donation, but you wanted to give him so much more than that. Even if the guy didn't know it right now - you wanted to give him another chance in life, so that he wouldn't continue to be just a miserable failure.

You ignored his donation cup. “I was wondering if you might have a moment because I'd like to make you an offer,” you continued politely and the man met your gaze at that. Yeah, you were really looking forward to what was about to happen - after all, you were known for letting your opponent only win if you allowed them to.

[taliabhattwrites]

I don't think there is a significant or notable number of people who believe transmascs are not oppressed.

I feel slightly insane just having to type this out, but this is rhetoric you inevitably come across if you discuss transfeminism on Tumblr.

The mainstream, cissexist understanding of transmasculine people is the Irreversible Damage narrative (one that's old enough to show up in Transsexual Empire as well) of transmascs as "misguided little girls", "tricked" into "mutilating themselves". It is a deliberately emasculating and transphobic narrative that very explicitly centers on oppression, even if the fevered imaginings misattribute the cause. As anyone who's dealt with the gatekeeping medical establishment knows, they are far from giving away HRT or even consults with both hands, and most transfems I know have a hard enough time convincing people to take DIY T advice, leave alone "tricking" anyone into top surgery.

Arguably, the misogyny that transmasculine folks experience is the defining narrative surrounding their existence, as transmasculinity is frequently and erroneously attributed to "tomboyish women" who resent their position in the patriarchy so much they seek to transition out of it. This rhetoric is an invisiblization of transmasculinity, constructed deliberately to preserve gendered verticality, for if it were possible to "gain status" under the sexed regime, its entire basis, its ideological naturalization, would fall apart.

Honestly, the actual discussions I see are centered around whether "transmisogyny" is a term that should apply to transmascs and transfems alike. While I understand the impetus for that discussion, I feel like the assertion that transmisogyny is a specific oppression that transfems experience for our perceived abandonment of the "male sex" is often conflated with the incorrect idea that we believe transmasculine people are not oppressed at all. This is not true, and we understand, rather acutely, that our society is entirely organized around reproductive exploitation. That is, in fact, the source of transfeminine disposability!

I know I'm someone who "just got here" and there is a history here that I'm not a part of, but so much of that history is speckled with hearsay and fabrication that I can't even attempt to make sense of it. All I know is that I, in 2024, have been called a revived medieval slur for effeminate men by people who attribute certain beliefs to me based on my being a trans woman who is also a feminist, and I simply do not hold those views, nor do I know anyone who sincerely does.

If you're going to attempt to discredit a transfeminist, or transfeminism in general, then please at least do us the courtesy of responding to things we actually say and have actually argued instead of ascribing to us phantom ideologies in a frankly conspiratorial fashion. I also implore people to pay attention to how transphobic rhetoric operates out in the wider world, how actual reactionaries talk about and think of trans people, instead of fixating so hard on internecine social media clique drama that one enters an alternate reality--a phantasm, as Judith Butler would put it.

Speaking of which--do y'all have any idea how overrepresented transmascs are in trans studies and queer theory? Can we like, stop and reckon with reality-as-it-is, instead of hallucinating a transfeminine hegemony where it doesn't exist? I'm aware a lot of their output isn't particularly explicative on the material realities of transmasculine oppression despite their prominence in the academy, but that is ... not the fault of trans women, who face extremely harsh epistemic injustice even in trans studies.

The actual issue is how invisiblized transmasculine oppression is and how the epistemicide that transmasculine people face manifests as a refusal to differentiate between the misogyny all women face, reproductive exploitation in particular, and the contours of violence, erasure, and oppression directed at specifically transmasculine people.

You will notice that is a society-wide problem, motivated by a desire to erase the possibilities of transmasculinity, to the point of not even being willing to name it. You will notice that I am quite familiar with how this works, and how it's completely compatible with a materialist transfeminist framework that analyzes how our oppression is--while distinct--interlinked and stems from the same root.

I sincerely hope that whoever needs to see this post sees it, and that something productive--more productive dialogue, at least--can arise from it.

[nicoliine]

About the times when Alastor touched you and when he expected you to do it back.

☆彡 How in the world does the radio demon, who doesn't really like physical contact, end up looking for any excuse to have his hands on you?

 ☆ Reader is g/n; no pronouns or y/n are used.

☆ Warnings: not really. Does a mental breakdown count as a warning? Alastor is a warning itself yk.

☆ English isn't my first language, so if there's any mistake I sorry-

 

You noticed that Alastor didn't like people's proximity when you first arrived at the hotel and he didn't even try to shake your hand. There, with your hand on the air, you stand waiting for his shake as you observe his ramblings about a whole different subject—not that you mind about all the weird souls that can be met in hell—watching him around the other hotel staff, you confirm it.

 

After a couple of days in the hotel and witnessing his power display, you made a mental note to not mess with him. That being said, you didn't really want to touch him.

You were a very touchy person, content to hug Pentious when you first saw him around in the morning or cuddle on the couch with Angel before he started to make a lewd comment about his job and you just ended up leaving him alone. Nifty seemed to enjoy being all over you, sitting on your shoulders while you were reading or just playing with your hair.

 

Another one who was happy about your touchy personality was Charlie, but she is just happy about everything.

 ☆◦•◦☆

It started a month from your arrival.

Alastor, being a self-proclaimed gentleman, didn't seem to be aware of your not touching Alastor rule, he started holding the door open for you then creating a shadow to lift up that heavy box that you needed to move, and you ended up—it was hard for you—just trying to move up your body away so you didn't end up too close to him, but he seemed to love your personal space so much.

 

One time, you were in the hallway, not really aware of your surroundings, until you felt an arm around your shoulders. When you heard his static voice, you froze on your steps, slowly turning your head to see him there, standing with that so-known smile of his. When he started to walk, still holding you, talking about that great idea for the hotel, you just couldn't pay so much attention. Your mind is running on thoughts about his proximity.

This wasn't the only time he ended up having you close to him; being honest, it seems to have a personal liking to your presence. You doubt he was like that before your arrival (as you already spoke with Charlie about it), but he could be found anywhere you were. If you ended up helping fix the balcony fence, he was there behind you—you're glad he's at least silent—or when you are in the bar just scrolling through your phone and he is watching you from the other side of the room, not wanting to be near your technology artifacts, is he just trying to drive you mad? Even though that look of his seems to be asking for something you don't know, you won't ask what it is. Just wait to see how it goes.

 

His touch soon became more frequent. You often end up with your own theory that it's something involuntary, like something he doesn't even notice by the way it feels, like deep in the end he just wants to be touched but don't know how to ask for it. But with that demon, nothing is sure; everything he does used to be planned. That's why you found yourself confused and don't want to test your luck.

 

When you are in the lobby in the middle of one of Charlie's activities and his arm ends up holding you by his side.

Or when he just kisses the back of your hand every time you first see him in the morning and every time he leaves, no exceptions, that confusing look of his is always there.

Just about that, your hands—he often takes your hands. While you are in the kitchen and waiting for the pasta on the stove, one of your hands is resting on the counter as you hold a recipe book, reading the next steps. He's by your side the whole time; one of his hands takes your free hand, making you pause your reading and look at him in surprise for the sudden action. He says nothing, and both of you are standing there in silence until you have to go back to cook. However, he doesn't seem to want to let you go yet because he will follow you as you move around the kitchen.

 

From them, it seems that everyone is aware of this weird Alastor thing.

Nobody talks about it though—you are surprised as they have stayed out of the subject, just making silent bets about the cause of this behavior of his—but you know it wouldn't take long for someone to talk about it.

 

 ☆◦•◦☆

The last time he put his hands on you, you were scared. So much has passed since the last time you felt this way. Anxious and terrified, everything around you was spinning; you had to run away from the hotel activities all day.

When Alastor found you in your room, you were a mess, all your stuff scattered around the room. You saw him from your seat in a corner on the other side of the room; the only candle in the nightstand seemed to be dead soon. He just stood there in front of you; you didn't even try to look up at him, just his shoes. You can tell so much about someone else by his shoes; his shoes seemed almost perfectly clean even after destroying his enemies. He's such a collected person that it scares you.

 

"Why, dear, would you look at me?" Alastor surely doesn't enjoy being ignored; you know that. You just couldn't find the strength to move when he spoke to you. It passed almost 5 minutes before you turned your head up, and he was so patient with you the whole time. "What is that troubling your mind, dear?"

 

You didn't respond right away; you're not sure how much time passed until you did it.

 

"It's just... everything." Your hands run around your face as you try not to have an attack right away in front of him. "I'm so scared, Alastor."

 

He just smiled; nothing was said; he didn't even try to touch your shoulder or hold you; he just smiled with that now so common smile of his, —you could swear it was the biggest smile you had seen on his face —one of his arms extended to you.

You have no idea why you did what you did; maybe he asked you directly, or you imagined it all, or his eyes showed what he wanted, or the candle in your room was one of Angel's drugs, or you just simply had a death wish. You don't know.

But you hugged him—just a hug—so hard that you could break his bones. When you took conscience about what you were doing, you tried to back down, not knowing how he could react to your contact.

But he didn't let you; his arm took you by the waist, and his staff was forgotten on the ground when he held your head against his shoulder.

 

You now understand why he always touched you. While you hands grabbed fists of his coat, he held you so tight, like it wasn't enough, and you just needed to be closer to him forever; he didn't want anything else.

So he did, he didn't let you go for a single moment that night; even when you were in bed, he held your hand the whole time. He just let you go the next morning when Vaggie insisted he needed to go do his job, even so he wouldn't forget to kiss your hand before he left. The ghost of his touch accompanied you all the time; it was like your body grew so used to his presence and his touch that you could feel it as a part of you.

Touch Starved! Alastor folks!!! Alastor is such an interesting character to write! I want ro respect him so bad.

Likes and reblogs are appreciated 💞