#just know that she and iceberg cant stand each other

[oddsandends58exe]

> :(

[animaniacsxposed]

Im someone that was in saneytwt around the time A! first came out in 2020 and let me tell you I've NEVER seen so many people cry "you better not ship the Warners!" or "ThEyRe mInOrS U cAnT sImP for ThEM" by SO many people who claim they can't stand that stuff just for them to do it!

There was a massive saneytwt block list going around and the people thay were added weren't even genuinely shipping it but the person was going through the warnercest tag to look at warnercest art to get the names of people thay were leaving likes. Do you see how NUTS of an exscuse that is?! The list got long enough to about 100+ people until OP realized she was getting nowhere with this and deleted it because everyone used it to follow each other.

Then there was a popular yakwak author we kicked IMMEDIATELY once it came out he brought a child into a nsfw server and groomed them into being their bf. The moment that happened saneytwt notified each other and he was exiles and kicked out of the fandom entirely.

Then the funniest thing to happen so far was one die hard anti was trolling a few authors accounts because they wrote yakdot fics and to counter that, she wrote a disgustingly gorey fic about the warners canabalizing a saneytwt fan (but you know the saying 'dont like dont look' and nobidy looked lmao!) The die hard anti also went undercover to "infiltrate saneytwt" I swear to God! They were so into their "role" that they drew tons of yakwak and shipped it hard. Then the day came where she admitted she was the anti harassing the authors in the beginning for the same thing she likes.

And then a big gimmick account with 100K following told their following of minors about warnercest and made them flood the #Warnercest with spam and hateful messages telling people to kill themselves etc etc...the evidence is all still there if you ever wonder why you see a bunch of brainwashed piss babies spamming the tag.

That's just the tip of the iceberg. As someone who's experienced ALL of this first hand from zanytwt and much from most of the people mentioned below, I want to thank you so much for exposing these losers and creeps. No one would listen to us for years and people have bothered us for no reason for years, the only exscuse they had for harassing us was because we shipped, wrote and drew warnercest, as if there isn't bigger problems in the world like people dying, uneducated kids and real child abuse going on around them everyday. Fuck all of these guys they're getting exactly what they deserve.

Good lord I cannot imagine being this uptight about cartoons. I am terribly sorry to hear all you guys have gone through anon and I hope this blog can bring some sort of closure or peace if it has deeply effected you. These guys are just depraved and jealous that that you are not afraid to say the things you love out loud and they are afraid because they build their following on hating the thing they really like. Then it all comes crashing down when they can't keep up the facade or have no one to talk to about the thing they really like.

[afro-hispwriter]

Don’t Blame me, Love made me Crazy(pt.1)

The Batman 2022

Bruce Wayne/Batman x f!Black!Reader

Summary- getting back in contact with your ex isn't always a bad thing

Warnings- mentions of past break up, injuries, mutual pinning, oral(f receiving), jealousy 

wc- 2.4k

a/n- I didn't feel like watching the batman movie again just to write this so bare with me

*inspired by Taylor Swifts- 'Don't Blame Me' and some The Batman tiktok edits lol*

taglist- @blue-aconite @cursedandromedablack @philiasoul @a-little-disguised @pop-rocks-and-skittles-and-skittles @xingqiusliegee @lana-isabelle @dopeqff @shawty-writes-a-little

pt.2

-

Working at the Iceberg Lounge was not what you thought was going to happen after your break up with the Bruce Wayne almost a year ago.

"Bruce I cant do this anymore, you're never here and I feel like im suffocating inside this place." You cry and squeeze your eyes with your fingers. "You don't even talk to me."

"I have other things to do." He mumbles and you scoff.

"Ya, so I guess your little Vengeance thing more important than me?" You say and his eyes widen.

"How do you know about that?" He asks and you scoff. 

"Bruce I live here, or did you forget about that too?"  

"Ill make It up to you, I promise, just please don't leave." He says and tries to go in for a hug but you step back, and grab the bag that sat on the table.

"You've missed your chances." 

That was the last time you saw Bruce. It was difficult to grab a job ever since Gotham found out about the bug breakup, but the iceberg 

You were sent to grab drinks for the Penguin and when you went, you saw a large man in a suit standing there. 

It was Bruce, the suit looked familiar but was clearly much more upgraded, but it was him. You took him in some more and took notice of how he towers over you even from afar. And damn, is that a muscle suit or has he been working out.

He stared at you as you walked in. He was shocked to see you there, let alone clearly working there(he would've heard about his ex working there). He looked you up and down, letting his eyes stop at your bare legs, The penguin watched you both stare at each other and smirked.

"Its ok sweetheart, Mr. Vengeance here doesn't bite." He says and you smile at him and set his drink down on the table. Penguin notices Batman still watching your every move and chuckles. "She's beautiful aye." Bruce stayed quiet and just flickered his eyes between the two of you. " Ya she is, id offer you to go into a private room with her but she only works serving drinks up here, but I have other girls who would be more th-."

"No, I just need information on the Mayors misteress." He says and points at the files on the table. You look at them and take in a deep breath and then look at Bruce with a knowing look. He looked back and cocked his head to the side. The penguin reached into his pocket and pulled out some packets and handed it to you. You took it with a smile and thanked him, you walked away and looked Bruce up and down in his suit.

You didn't bother to listen into their conversation and just walked away. You dropped the tray at the bar and left the lounge. You hailed a cab to drive you back to your apartment. Bruce could not walk back into your life again, he just cant.

But would it be so bad if he did?

-

When you entered the apartment you could already feel the feeling of being watched. You looked out the window and that's when you saw him. Standing on the rooftop looking right back. You roll your eyes and wave him over. You barley realized him leave the rooftop because in a matter of minutes a harsh knock came to the front door and you rushed to the door and looked through the peek hole, to see him there. You open the door and he immediately pushed through making you scoff.

"Ya Batman you can come in."

"Why are you working at the Iceberg Lounge?" He asks. "Its not safe."

"Im aware Bruce, can I call you that?" You ask but he doesn't respond so you roll your eyes. "I needed money." 

"What about the money-." 

"The money that mysteriously appeared in my account the day after we broke up, ya its gone because I had to use a lot of it to buy this place." You shrug and look around the place. "I had to buy furniture, food, essentials, etc. I don't have a big business where I get millions the second I sign a paper, I actually have to work." 

He didn't say anything just looked behind you to a window and walked towards it. He shut the blinds and turned back before reaching up to unlock the cowl and slide it off. His black hair fell around his eyes and you noticed the black eyeshadow making you laugh.

"What?"

"Nothing, its just I see you found my eyeshadow pallet I forgot." Bruce shook his head and set the cowl on the coffee table. 

"I saw the look you gave me, you know something." He started but you shook your head. 

"I don't know anything, I mean I know girls have been going missing." You say and walk to the kitchen. "Want anything to drink?" No response. You look back to see Bruce inspecting the table with all the overdue payment letter. "What never see an overdue letter?" 

"I can help you pay it off if you give me the information you know and help me get more." You frowned at him.

"You cant just come in here and expect me to tell you anything or even help you." 

"So you know something."

Fuck.

"And what if I do?" 

"If you, do ill make sure you don't get evicted in 3 days." He says and throws a letter on the table. You sigh and give in, scoffing before speaking.

"The mayors mistress is Annika Kosolov, haven't seen her in a bit, but the last time I saw her." You walk past Bruce and sit on the couch and he watches you. "Last time I saw her she was talking to some of the girls and she looked terrified, now the mayors dead and no sign of her." 

"You close with her?" 

"No, I've only talked with her, but shes just a fucking kid who just wishes she could leave Gotham, heard her saying something about even wanting to leave the country but the mayor was holding something that prevented her from leaving."

"Like what?"

"That I don't know." An awkward silence came though the air and you slapped your hands on your thighs. "Need anything else?" 

"I'll call you." He says and grabs his cowl and secures it on his head. He opens the window and climbs through swiftly. You walked over to close the window but he stopped you.

"It was nice seeing you again." He says and you felt butterflies in your belly and smiled at him.

"Ya you too, take care." You say and raise your arms up to the window, you didn't miss how his eyes flickered down to your chest. 

"Stay safe." He was gone after that. You shut the window and flop back down on the couch. You dosed off and was started by a ding from your phone. You grab it and look at it.

50,000 dollars has been deposited into your account

BW - I missed you

Double Fuck.

-

It was barley a day later when Bruce called you. 

"I need you to find out information at the lounge, but I need you to go downstairs." 

"Are you crazy? They'd never let me go down there, they know I work up top." 

"I doubt you'll have a problem, just wear something more revealing." You roll your eyes.

"Why don't I just go naked?" He knows you're smirking on the other end.

"I'd prefer you wouldn't, just meet me at the little cafe a few blocks from the lounge at 7 on the dot."

"Yes sir." You say then laugh. "Remember when I used to call you sir as you bent-."

"Goodbye." He hanged up and you giggled.

-

7 hit and you were walking into the cafe. Bruce appears in his Batman suit from the shadows and takes in your attire.

It was a tight black dress that just sat a few inches bellow your ass. The dress even pushed up your boobs making them almost spill over.

"My eyes are up here." You say and his eyes immediately went up to your face. He doesn't respond and walks over to the table where he had equipment laying on. 

"Put this in." He says and hands you a little box. 

"Aww you're proposing." You say and pout playfully.

"I would've." He says and watches you open the box and pause at hearing his words. You then continue opening the box fully and furrow your eyebrows.

"Contact lenses?"

"I need to be able to see whats going on in there and to identify the people." He says and you pick up a lens and look up. Once they were both in, you blinked and looked at him. 

"They look good? Wait can they see them?" You say and try to find a mirror in the little store. Bruce takes a step closer to you and looks you down. You felt butterflies in your stomach but didn't look at him.

"Look at me." He says deeply and places two fingers under your chin and pulls it up. 

You almost melted.

Bruce looked deep into your eyes and couldn't help but flicker his eyes to your lips. He slowly leaned down making his covered nose brush against yours. Your heart was beating quickly, his lips brushed against yours and you immediately licked your lips.

"Kiss me." You breathed out and Bruce obeyed. he pushed his lips against yours and melted, he then bent his knees and picked you up by the underside of your ass. You wrapped your legs around his hips and pulled him in tightly. Bruce pressed you up against the wall without pulling away and rested his hands on your thighs. He pulled away then looked down to see the dress riding up, letting him see the panties. Bruce let your legs drop to the floor then dropped to his knees and reached up to the hem of your panties and pulled them down. You stepped out of them and watched Bruce slip them into a pocket of his utility belt. 

"I'm keeping it,' He says then grabs one of your legs and places it over his shoulder. 

"Perv." You say then gasp when you feel his lips wrap around your clit.

-

You wiped your eye for what it seems the hundredth time, praying mascara wasn't running down your cheeks, and it was annoying that your legs wobbled after every few steps through the lounge. 

"I hate you.' You whisper and you hear the comm come alive.

"That's not what you were saying a few minutes ago." He says deeply and you groan. 

"Since when did you become bold?" It was a rhetorical question so he didn't answer. You made your way down stairs and made it down without any problems. 

"Alright just look at everyone, but not to quick, I need facial recognition to work."

"Yes sir and I better get my underwear back perv." You mumble and start looking around. Your eyes passed by some people, Bruce occasionally telling you to stop and look at them. None of them seem to catch on to your stares except one.

Gil Colson the District Attorney Chief.

Bruce told you to join him and you did. He seemed scared and paranoid, always looking over his shoulder at the people. He eventually started mumbling about a mole in the system. Bruce pressed you on to find out more so you placed a hand on his thigh. Bruce watched intently on the screen and tightened his fist. 

"I have enough." He says and you sigh lowly in relief but keep a smile. You dismissed yourself, ignoring Colson's calls to come back. You were just about to reach the exit of the underground when someone stopped you, someone you wished Bruce wasn't about to see. 

"Hey babe." He says and grabs your hand into his. "You haven't been returning my calls."

"Who is that?" Bruce asked but he was saying it to himself. The facial scanner told him and he rolled his eyes, dudes just some big manager at Gotham Bank, but why was he calling you babe. Were you dating? How long have you known him? Did you cheat on that guy with him? Where you safe? So many questions were running through his mind.

"Peter leave me alone." You say and rip yourself from his grasp.

"Y/n who is he?" Asks Bruce and you roll your eyes once again.

"None of your business."

"Do you have a relationship with him?" 

"What no, this isn't your concern?"

"Has he hurt you?" 

"Bruce!" You say and walk into a bathroom. "Me and you are not in a relationship, you have no right to be jealous just because I let you put your face between my thighs again, it doesn't mean we're back together."

"But I want you back." He says in a soft voice, the one who was speaking to you was Bruce not Batman. 

"I want that too." You admit and lean against the sink. "But I don't know if I'm ready." You take out the ear piece so you didn't have to hear him speak. You made your way out of the club onto the street where you see Colson once again.

"Hey you need a ride?" He asks and starts walking towards but you shake your head.

"No thanks." You then do a small jog away from him and turned the corner. You made sure nobody followed and made your way to the little café. Bruce was sitting in the chair looking at the door waiting for you to enter. 

He stood from his chair and you held your hand out to give him the earpiece. You then reached into your eyes and took out the contacts as Bruce grabbed the little box. You placed the contacts in the liquid and smiled up at him, he didn't smile back but his eyes softened when he looks at you. 

"Do you need a ride home?" He asks but you shake your head.

"Ill be ok, because I know you'll be watching over me." You wink and Bruce starts to reach into his utility belt and pulls out the lacy fabric making you smirk. "Keep it, I doubt this will be the last time we see each other."

-

a/n- part 2 is queued for later today

[randomsevans]

maid to be part 3

Ransom made his way back to his family with a small smile due to you being on your mind . He slipped into the living room , where his family were waiting for him . The food long forgotten and not eaten  in the room next door .As most of the family were stood up with a glass of what ever drink was going around . 

Ransom didn't want to hear the pathetic whines from his mother nor his uncle . So he made his way over to the corner , where he spotted his younger cousins Jacob and Megan . Yes he hated his family , but his cousins was the most bearable .With Megan hating the family just as much as him , and well Jacob just sits their quietly on his phone ... so Ransom never really fought with him , Apart from this one time when Jacob made his way upstairs and almost caught you and Ransom . But Ransom played it off by shouting at both you and Jacob in his cruel dickhead way .But of course you didn't take it to heart , it wasn't the first nor the last time  he acted that way to you with his family around . 

Ransom sighted , straightening his blue knitted sweater before sitting down on the oversized ,chair , that was so unconformable . He moved around on the seat , eventually getting some what comfortable places his armed on each side , bring one of his fist to lean against 

“is she okay ?” Megan looked up  from her college book for a second to Ransom , only to go back to it 

“huh !” Ransom responded , tired from his family already , he had some much on his mind , and you were at the front of it as always , as well as the pressure he already feels from soon to be a father . 

“Y/N is she okay ?” Megan asked once again closing her book , Megan made it her job to know all the helps names , she didnt like having other on her beck and call , and calling them “the help “ 

Ransom decided to play dumb and show off his arsehole personal “who ? the maid “ 

Megan glared at him in annoyance “you know their have names right Hugh , not just maids or the help “

Ransom just simple shrugged his shoulders “oh well “

“why did you even help her , she only hurt her self a little i dont see you do that with anyone ?” she narrowed her eyes at him , it caught the attention  of Jacob bring his head from his phone looking from one cousin to the other 

“oh well you know me Meg i see something pretty , i wanted it and i take it “ he let out a little  dry chuckle “its amazing how a girl can open up to you if you show them a little bit of kindest “ Ransom smug smile played  happily on his face . 

Megan looked at him in disgust and her face scrunched up , while Jacob snicked at his older cousin “your disgusting Hugh , she would never go any where near you , she actual has self respect you know !”

Ransom chuckled at his self , if only she knew , if only all his family knew , That you were indeed already his , and he is your ever since he wanted you , he couldn't get enough , he never looked at another girl since , and that was well a year ago . But Megan was right you do have self respect which is why you wanted nothing to do with Ransom at first , but after months , And Ransom means MONTHS , 4 long ones , you finally agreed to allow him to take you on a simple date . You didn't wanted anything fancy or expensive . So you and Ransom spent your first of many dates at a park , just simple walking and talking . 

“sure its never stop me before i always break them in the end . And its RANSOM and the help calls me ...

“HUGH ! yeah i know “ Megan said getting up from her seat . “ you really are vile piece of work “ she barked as she walked away exiting the room 

“why thank you very much “ Ransom said amused , watching Megan walk towards the kitchen . His eyebrows shoot up curiosity , as his lips tighten 

“why does she need to go into the kitchen ?“ 

Ransom shot up and made his way back to the kitchen he was in moments ago . 

as he  got closer he heard mumbles of voice , as he hide around the corner 

“ i mean it y/n “  megan’s voice boomed 

ransom sighed shaking his head “what is she still doing down stairs she needs to be up there resting “

Ransom heard you delicate laugh that fluttered his heart  , he took  a quick glance and saw you standing at the sink , with your hands in the water , scrubbing away at a plate  “god she never listen , so stubborn ,she  needs to learn that its not just her she needs to look after now its our baby too “

“dont you think i know that Megan “ you giggled 

“y/n his a fuck boy okay , if you let him near you , he will use you and then leave you and move on to the next chase “

Ransom let out a snicker , but he couldn't blame his cousin he was indeed like that ,   that was before you , and Ransom hoped and prayed you knew he would never leave you especial now you and him were staring a family together 

“ Megan i know okay “ you dawned out “ i promise okay im not foolish enough to follow under the charm of  Hugh Drsysale okay “

 A smug devilish smile came to Ransom lips as he thought “but thats exactly what you did ! look at my girl lying so well , im rubbing of on her , well  she is growing a miniature version of me anyway “

if you had told Ransom a year ago that he would be in love and looking forwards to becoming a father , he would of laughed in your face , And if you said it was to the help well , you would simple end up in ER by the end of it . 

“ but y/n he has he eye on you “ megan stated 

and i was true , and its all Ransom would until his last breath 

“hes not going to st... “ 

“Who has an eye on y/n “ Joni interpreted her daughter as she stumbled in the kitchen from the other entrance 

“who is y/n anyway ?” she asked , megan pointed towards you as she rolled her eyes at her tipsy mom “oh the help ... who would want you “ she snarled . Ransom felt his blood began to boil at the way Joni was speaking to his girl 

“Ransom “ Megan simple answer . You cheeks become blushed with embarrassment , as you turned away from the sink , and began fiddling with the end of your apron and you become nervous . Ransom wanted nothing more then to wrap you in his arms and take you home , To spend the rest if the day sleep on the couch as Ransom babbles on about plans for the baby . As much as he tries to hide it Ransom cant help but be exited over the baby . That why his is so protective because if anything happened to you or the baby Ransom would loss the only happiness he has ever known . 

“pfff Ransom is many thing , a low life is one of them . But at least he has taste he wouldn't dare for for a fat , trampy ...” 

 before Joni could finish Ransom busted into the kitchen 

“say one more thing about me or her , and ill knock the Botox of your  face “ Ransom snarled ,fist  formed on his side . As everyone in the room , you , Megan , Joni and the rest of the help looked at him with wide eyes 

“pfff what ever you'll just get the STDs “ Joni wobbled 

“MOTHER !” megan shouted 

“you should know , how many people you passed it on to “ Ransom rage showing , as he stood right in front of Joni blocking her view of either you or Meg 

“WHY YOU LITTLE .....” Joni began to screech at the top of her lungs 

“What is going on in here !” Richard voice boomed throughout the kitchen , everyone glanced his way , seeing the rest of family moving into the kitchen 

“nothing “ megan answered as she went closer to you 

“pff doesn't sound like nothering “ Linda snirked downing the rest of her drink placeing her glass on the counter . starring at her son , who was clealry anger , as he starred daggeres towrads Joni with his fist still by his side turning white 

“son whats going on ?” Richard asks 

“yes id like to know that to “Walt questioned placing his hands on his hips  

Joni lened away from Ransom as her lip began to tremble “ i ... i dont know .. he just started ... on me “ Joni was trying to act all innocent , but it wasnt working on anyone as there all snirked , giggled with “ oh god “    “ here we go “    “ who is ready for the preference of a life tme “    “ oh mother “ 

But Ransom only lerned down towards his aunts ear , so only she could hear him “ i mean it joni say one more thing and ill tell Harlan were Megans college money realy goes “ he barked . 

Joni slapped Ransom full force around the face . The whole room fell slight , watching Rasom  wipe the little blood , form the small cut on his  bottom lip . Ransom smiple nodded his head and wnet to step forward with his fist ready , he didnt care if you were his family , his aunt , a women , she insuled his girl , called her fat when she is carrying his child . 

But just before Ransom could swing , you stepped inbetween Ransom and Joni , placing a hand on his chest while the other wrapped your hand around his fist and brung it down . While she starred into his blue eyes , that were iceberge forced on Joni , only to glance down at you and soft in to the blue ocean , that flashed with , conserin , guilt and above all love 

As the two of you stood there locked eyes with each other , the family looked at you two of you, squinting there eyes , amazed and confrussed on how you so easily calmed down  the short tempered , play boy . Harlan was rolled into the kitchen by Martha he looked around his family . He heard the screaming of couse , but he was beyonded confused on how silent his family , were as there all looked at Ransom . Harlans once eyebrows shoot up , at the way Ransom was looking at you . He shot at look up to Matha , who shrugged not knowing herself

“ oh great his fuckin the help “ Walt broke the silents lifting his armes in the air , shaking his head 

“fucked a baby into her too “ Ransom snarles , with a lovly smile , as he looked upon your shocked face , eyes wide month wide open . He just told everyone your biggest screate , you didnt know if you was to be anger at him or found it all funny . But how could you be mad at him and he locked eyes wit you stoking your cheek , as one hand went to you small blowed stomach , with love and effection . the room was quickly filled with screams , shouting and gasped 

“what !”

“HUGH RANSOM DRSYALDLE “ 

“hes joking right !” 

“that explain why his being acting weird “ 

“oh just like him to do that i bet she not the only one his knocked up “

“the help , and our family !”

“ you better be fuckin lying “ 

“OH SON !”

“SHE PROBABLY LIED TO HIM FOR THE MONEY !” 

“hes not fit to be  a father “

“there better get ride of it , “

“ Are you fuckin kidding me the help “ 

“so much of not going near him “

“of couse shes up the duff “

“ i never knew his stands where so low 

“really y/n “ 

you and ransoms just starred at each other slowing giggling with each other , that quickly turned into a booming laugh from the pair of you . the family grew slight , snarking at you and Ransom childish behaviour. While Ransom grabbed your hand , interwinding your fingers , as he gave you a knowing look , you simple nodded knowing what he was going to do  Moments later . You and Ransom were ranning through the halls of the manner , as Ransom held tight your hand as he dragged you behind him heading towards the front door , ignoring the shouts of the mad family 

END

But may add an odd one shot or two to the story in the future

[westernchords]

2020: a replay & reflection

so... here we are at the near end of a very long, unsettling & strange year. and at this particular moment in time, spotify has released its 2020 wrapped feature, an annual highlight for gay people everywhere (self VERY included). since the world is very large & this is a personal blog with a limited scope, i'll talk about what i know best: the view from my corner of the musical world.

i only had two songs in common with any previous year -- i wish i missed my ex by mahalia & sugar by brockhampton (... i know, the heartache is loud already,)

4 unique rain asmr audios made it into my top 15 (they help me sleep lolol)

show tunes was my #4 most listened to genre and yet not a single one made it into my top 100. (i'm pretty sure it was all of my late night waitress sing alongs)

i discovered 1,012 new artists and 162 new genres

all very fun and interesting things! however, in looking at this year, there are two things to discuss that are most important: the amount of time i spent listening to music (111,989 minutes) and my top song, fake mona lisa. let's discuss both.

on time: in short, music means a lot to me. in long, i mean that music has been central to my life for as long as i can remember. i think of my church choir and my mother singing eartha kitt and corrine bailey rae in the kitchen, my father's surprise talents at piano when he would play in chapel, and how i like to make up little ditties to sing for my dog or while i cook or to solely entertain myself. if one was to take a look at my journals, each entry is annotated with the song i was listening to or suited my mood at the time i was writing. at any moment, i am capable of revisiting the emotional landscape of old memories all set to the very soundtrack that holds that particular past closest.

i still remember plucking violin strings at 5, how i used to stack music books so i could sit up straight on my piano bench because i was too short at 7, picking up woodwinds in highschool and letting my best friend act as conductor, and now, singing endlessly- day in and day out, because it makes me feel like i am traveling home. i think of creole folk songs that connect me to my family, my diaspora. i remember the favorite songs and artists of people i don't know anymore, but still. it stays with me. my friend cj says i have a great emotional sensitivity to music, but more so, music simply connects to every cornerstone of who i am. the creation of it, the listening, the love of it. the constancy.

music is integral to my daily routine and life. since i was 13, maybe younger, i have always believed that the first song i hear in a day sets the tone so i always try to play something i love and makes me feel joyful to start off on the right foot. i will do this my entire life. every day is permeated by sound and the data shows it. 111,989 minutes is almost 3 months straight. this doesn't even count soundcloud listens or youtube tracks or music i play on my own. this felt fitting. music, this year in particular, has been a salve to both new and old hurt. and maybe i am picking at my scabs, but 2020 has amplified so much anger and shame and fear and despite that, there is so much joy in art. music is a balm for the world, it is poetry in its own right.

on fake mona lisa: so .. i am kind of obsessed with this song. fifteen hours worth of listening, i text my friends i'll join the video call soon - i just need one more replay, i got high and played this song while lying in the middle of a meadow and experienced more emotions than i had had in a very long time, my friends lovingly tease me about it so it's sort of like a character trait now, kind of obsessed. my turning to this song was the sort of romance that i didn't anticipate, but fell very hard into and, if you know me, you know that's my favorite kind. let's get into why: when dedicated side b came out, i was heartbroken. there's really no other way to put it. i was alone, back in my childhood bedroom, and harboring a reopened wound from past relationships that maybe had never closed in the first place. i was in this strange, melancholic knee-deep-in-emotions place & if you're an avid CRJ fan, you recognize that's a place she knows and sings about well.

as a song, fake mona lisa tends to be one of carly's more lyrically opaque tracks. which is fine, i'm a storyteller at heart, i'll craft my own narrative. (and honestly, there wasn't much legwork here.) without doing a full blown analysis, here are pieces that i find important to note about the song lyrically and resonate most with me -- big or small.

(transcription at bottom)

what i'm basically saying is that this song is about risk and young love and sex. its about secrets, cheap thrills, fast & easy desires, and the fantastical euphoria of a dead-end-but-still-fun “we're young so what's the matter,“ relationship. (very reminiscent of LA hallucinations, imo) and to me, someone who has been in and out of this same subset of emotional affairs, fake mona lisa stuck with me. vegas is a city of high risk, high reward- where else to chase that superficial, unattainable someone? more so, the song gives you the understanding that the relationship doesn't last, but that was not what carly ever truly wanted out of it. fake mona lisa is, at its core, about over indulgence in pleasure as a stand in for actual love + commitment, something i am oft to do myself & only did more of after dedicated side b dropped. i latched onto the slow and simmering exposition into glittery pre-chorus, starlit imagery, shiny-faraway vocals, and frankly, there was no competition for my song of the year. the song is a dream. i love it and i know what that says about me, but i stand by it. 

dedicated side b, especially fake mona lisa, carried me through the healing process of heartbreaks that crystallized into many other things- indulgence, desire, risk, short lived romances, secrets, joy, kisses i should've kept to myself, spontaneous dance breaks, tears, etc., it is an album about love, recovery, and returning to the self. fake mona lisa is just my favorite stop on a long train ride to an okay-ness with aspects of romance (both with the self and others) that i am still figuring out the messy, rose-tinted, contours of.

and sonically? i just adore the key of d minor.

as a last touch point, fake mona lisa was only the tip of the iceberg of songs  i obsessed over about not-exactly-ideal romances. again and again and again, heartbreak anthems appeared in my top 100, a deviation from my typical warmth towards romantic sentiments that appeared in past years. instead, there is a sense of love-at-a-distance, a painting yourself as the object of desire, a severed attachment, a not wanting to commit at all (see let's be friends, heartbeat, want you in my room, all by crj ... all appearing on the list.) however, much of what appeared celebrated love and having tremendous, special, struck by cupid, feelings. it's all there. what i'm saying is that carly rae jepsen writes music for lovestruck people- both lucky and not so much, hopeless or hopeful -- you name it. she writes about how you can fall in love with almost anyone, soundtracks for the highs of the first throes of intimacy, the first (and last) kiss, the shared moments between two people when they are each other's whole world, and the palpable distance of heartache, separation, and the landscape between. 

she writes as though she is both eros and psyche, armed with arrows of cascading melodies, tipped with a salve for suppressing+healing+amplifying heartbreak, and lyrics so intimate and dreamy, you really can't help but believe in love with the way she speaks of it. love is a venture from shame, a fantasy that is more real than anything else, tender and kind, pleasurable, and escapable into. the world is better in it, the world is better because of it. in carly rae jepsen's discography, love is the defining pillar of experience. a northern star and guiding principle. it is the only thing, no matter what form. & frankly? i cant help but agree.

as a final note, in hanif wills-abdurraqib's emotion review for MTV, carly rae jepsen's public displays of affection, he says this:

thats all for now. bye 2020.

- august

///

transcription of my notes:

verse 1:

city/star light imagery

i am known for wearing a star stamp on my cheek

infatuation & attraction

paints a photo of a starlet and her lover, a fair weather affair

pre-chorus:

always waiting fro a chance the object of desire

a high from love, addictive pleasures

chorus:

sex & art & risk taking (art synonymous with beauty. + seduction)

she knows she cant handle this in a real way, but wants it

desire vs/& (in conjunction with) pain

verse 2:

an idealistic worldview, hoping for the best, always somewhere else not present. 

dreamy lyrics + dreamy state of mind, cloudy even.

specifically the words fake mona lisa:

contrast, beautiful yet fully acknowledged to be unreal/superficial

a stand in for “real art“ aka “real love“

[not-a-gotham-villain]

Part 2

TW: Death, Extreme violence, slight swearing, Guns, Kinves

(i cant do under the cut on mobile so be ready to scroll sorry..)

Her broken Jaguar mask works surprisingly well considering what it's been through. Perhaps it's because whoever sees her face now doesn't live to tell the tale. She can only think of one time anyone got away alive seeing her face over the past Three days.

She had walked her way into the iceberg lounge an hour before penguin hightailed it out because her tip line had gone cold and she could feel how close she was to finding Falcone. Needless to say, Penguin was not happy to see her.

"Ah, Jaguar! Long time no see my dear!" His voice was condescending and his men were armed. "I've heard you've caused quite ruckus all around town recently. Any reason you've stopped by?"

"Buzz off Penguin. I'm not here to kill your goons."

"Character development." Nygma quipped. He was seriously unnecessary and proved to test Jade's already thin patience.

"I just need information. My wells gone... dry." she ground out.

Penguin huffed a laugh before he relaxed his guards and gestured Jade to sit next to him. She refused.

"Falcones at 213 30 Primrose street. Red warehouse."

".....how did you know who i was after?" Jade asked.

"Because i've worked with you since you were definitely not 17, and the only person you ever talked about was him. I did the math."

Jade's eyes narrowed as she collected her things. "You aren't gonna try and stop me, are you?"

Penguin laughed, a little bitterly, a little mockingly. "I'm not sentimental dearie. I will say though," his face got deadly serious then "that his son's died. You two are the only ones left."

Jade stared at penguin for a bit before heading for the door.

"Just for the record, Im sorry Jade. I truly am. Most of us had no idea." Penguin said it a way so plaintively he could have almost mean it.

Jade slammed the door shut on her way out.

☠︎

Falcone's private room security is painfully understaffed. A single man, a whisp really, stands outside his office door.

"What's your name kid?"

Jade resents that.

"Jade Dawes."

"Really? Ya know that used to be a DA's name. Till we bumped him and his family off. You knew him?"

Jade really resents that.

"A little."

He gives her a look before searching through a clipboard, as if Falcone was a legitimate buissness man and not a Class-S Mob Boss. Jesus, she was already planning on killing the guy but he's just making it too easy.

"You got an appointment?"

"Yeah. Five years in the making."

"Wha-"

The silenced bullet goes cleanly through airheads brain. She wasn't really planning on killing him, but everyone else in the buildings dead, so she guesses due diligence won't hurt.

The door opens as millions of others close.

"Janessa. Pleasant surprise. Please do sit down." The man who says the name she hasn't heard in five years looks the same now as he did then. Falcone is still tall, and lean, and his voice still reminds her of beach houses in the summer, before her father had found out about his job and their lives had gone to hell.

"I'm not here to talk Uncle Carmine." She hopes the title comes off as mocking. From the way he reacts, it does. "You know what I'm here for."

Falcone stares at her for a few more seconds before he sighs deep and turns away from his windowed perch towards her.

"Will this" he gestures to her aimed gun with his bourbon "really accomplish what you want Janessa?"

"It doesn't matter what I want." She lies "Its what you deserve." He's far enough away so that she doesn't need to strain her head too much to see his face.

"We are the only ones left little one. Your family is long gone. So is my wife. Mario died Saturday night. If you were to do this, you would be all alone." He's taking languid steps her way, and with each one she feels smaller and younger.

"You killed my family Carmine." She sets her jaw in determination.

"And your family locked away mine, an eye for an eye my dear."

"You shot them right in front of me! You burnt their bodies in a pile! I can't even go near restaurants without -"

She cuts herself off, her voice beginning to shake.

"Piccola, that is why we must start over. Live a new life. Be like my daughter again. Don't you remember how it could be?"

Unbidden, memories of a lifetime ago crop up. She remembers sitting silently at the beach, just seven years old, watching as uncle Carmine taught her how to make a drip sand castle. She remembers thinking he was the greatest man she'd ever seen, right after her dad. Her heart sinks.

"That-that can't happen now. We're-it's-it's all too far gone." Falcone is right up in front of her now. She feels seven years old again next to his six foot three.

He sighs again, and places a hand on her shoulder. She thinks she might cry.

"Well then my dear, do you think we should get it all done with together? After all, what did you have planned for after you killed me?" He points his gun to her temple and her gun to his own.

Jade is silent. Her head is racing. She needs to decide.

Needless to say, she doesn't get to.

Glass shatters everyone, and Falcone is pushed out of her line of sight by something large and black. Upon further inspection she realizes it's Batman. If Jade was in any physical or emotional capacity to she would scream.

"Get away from her you slimy bastard!"

They tussle for a while, a second, a minute, an hour, forty days and forty nights? She can't tell. However eventually Falcone's gun is confiscated by the more powerful Batman and the former is left slumped on the floor, defeated.

"You should let her decide who to go with, Dark Knight." They must have had some important conversation about Jade's autonomy while she was out.

The Bat tenses again, starting at the hands and working up to his temple and then down again. It's strange, being able to see the Batman in full detail. She never got to catalog his responses to jabs or taunts. Yes, she's worked with Batman before, but at the time he was more concerned with Tori's stubborn demands to join then properly introducing himself to Jade. (The green beast whose name she refuses to say spins in her stomach at a very inconvenient time)

"Fine." The Batman spits out. "Jade, what do you want to do?" His voice is paradoxically soft and terse.

"How—how did you find me?" It's not what she meant to say, but it works. "Were-were you tracking me?!"

The responding silence should make her feel indignant, however she is also feeling very overwhelmed.

"He does that often piccola, no respect for personal privacy." Falcone makes no effort to move, slumped up against the wall. His arm is covering his stomach, he's bleeding.

"You stabbed him!" Jade's voice comes out more panicked then she wanted.

"Come here la mia piccola farfalla."

"Jade.." Batman says.

Jade ignores him.

"Zio.." her italian's a little rusty, but she seems to get the message across.

"Listen my little butterfly. We must move on from this." He places a calloused hand on her cheek. "My empire is all but collapsed now, thanks in part to you. Come with me, we can rebuild in Italy, or perhaps just live. You can find a good husband and settle down. I could finally have grandchildren. Please, let me be your Uncle again."

Jade is shaking like a leaf now and she prays she isn't going to cry. "I can't Zio, not after what you did."

Falcone sighs "Well, thats alright, I was going to die anyways."

Jade feels more than see's the knife slip out of his pocket. She acts on instinct, and before Batman can say anything there are three shots ringing out into the night.

Falcones hand goes limp, and falls to the floor.

Jade does the only thing she can do in this situation. She screams.

☠︎

Jade can't tell how long she screamed before she started to sob, but it must have been a long time, because she doesn't get her senses back until she's speeding down an avenue in the Batcar.

She thinks she remember him carrying her. Is she really that light now? She must be, she cant remember the last time she ate.

"Ah. You're awake. I'm getting you to your apartment, but I'm going to be stripping it out. All your identifying objects need to go, otherwise the gangs will track you."

Batman wont look at her, but she thinks he looks the tiredest she's ever seen him.

"Why?" she can't form anymore words than that. He seems to understand.

"With the stunt you've pulled over the last few days, the crime families will be worse than ever trying to fix themselves up, and they'll be aching for blood. So no more Vigilante work of any sort, no more crime, hell, don't go out without asking me first. I'll set up an allowance so you can quit your job, and I'll drop off some old clothes of the robins for you to wear. Jaguar and NightFawn are dead, you hear me?"

She sits silently, taking in the new information. She can't feel anything.

"Am I adopted?"

Batman laughs. "Not exactly." They pull up to her apartment complex's fire escapes. "You're almost home." He walks out of the drivers side and circles over to pick Jade up out of the passengers seat. She'd be embarrassed if she wasn't so empty.

"I don't have a home." She says. She's still crying, she doesn't know why.

"You will one day kid, you will."

[geisterfuchs]

The Interview - Ask

What is your full name? “Oh, hello there, I am Carina Hlaiwa, and who might you be?”

What do your friends call you? “Carina, they call me...”, she ponders for a moment, then looks at the one with the scribbling block, who had suddenly started to ask her questions while she was browsing the market stands of Kugane. “...is that a bad thing, cos you seem to expect something else from the look on your face?”

What is your favorite animal? “I don’t really....”, she starts, but then remembers that this is not only a foreign town, but a whole lot foreign culture around here. So maybe this is customs around here?... better not refuse... “..well, if i have to choose one, it would be the Chocobo...”, she looks around, apparently checking if a certain someone is around, “...but do never tell some grumpy Seeker about this, please...”

Where were you born? “On the Isle of Vylbrand, La Noscea to those foreign folks at home.... or more precisely, in the port city of Limsa Lominsa. Sure you will have heard of Eorzea’s pearl around here?”

Do you have any children? “Yes, Five actually.”, she says, a wide smile brightening her features, “...though only one born from my own blood, yet. Not that it matters, i love all of them equally.”

Is there a person/people you love? “Oh Gods, there are many. My family, and my ever so loving husband would only be the tip of the iceberg here. There’s a whole bunch in our houses, then dear friends, far and near... just too many to name right here....”

What is your favorite colour?

“Rolanberry, of course... and by chance my hair is of the same colour.”

What is your full occupation? Without even thinking she answers, “Mother, cook, traditional healer. I used to be counted among the Conjurers of Gridania’s ranks, but some less fortunate experiences soured that for me, and I arrived where I am now.” 

Are you good at physical fighting? ”Hells, no... see me carrying a weapon, do yourself a favour and run... I am so clumsy, nearly every time I try people and things around me get hurt...”

Which form are you best at? “I’m the least incompetent with a bow, though there are many I haven’t tried. I don’t need to become a Calamity myself.” she blushes, having answered htese last questions about her failures.

What about magic? She hesitates for a moment, and her cheeks take on a slightly more purple colizr then before. she seems to be embarrassed and a little afraid as well. “I really should not speak about this. I don’t want to repeat the Gridanian incidents here in a city that doesn’t yet fear me.” she then looks up again, suddenly aware that she spoke too much of that aloud. “Oh, please, don’t tell anybody that, and don’t write this down, please... I don’t want to be the ‘Demon Girl’ again! Please...”

Which type are you best at? She sighs, then whispers, "I will tell you what I’m not good at, which is healing magic... cant do it for the life of me... Whenever I try i blow things up... but no telling, yes, please?”

Craftsmanship? The switch of topic makes her take a breath again, and she seems very much relieved. “Thank you... cooking, I’m quite good at cooking. My husband and friends claim that I’m one of the best if not the best cooks of Eorzea... but they say that only to tease me. I’m alright I guess.”, she smiles when recollecting the memories of her friends saying those words. “Apart from that, I’m not half bad with a sewing needle, cos, you know, five girls... you gotta sew many things.”

Any other skills? “People tell me i am the born mother... and i agree with them. Nothing give me more joy than caring for my family.”

Are you an only child? "Oh, no... I have three siblings, two sisters and a brother... though my brother we lost sight of a long time ago.. I don’t even know if he is still alive.” The last part leaves her thinking for a moment, and parting from those thoughts again with a heavy sigh.

Where do you see yourself in five years? “Hopefully I’ll have at least another child by then, maybe a boy for a change, though, being a Mioq’te, Mephina must smile on me for that one to happen. Also, I hope, by then, we’l be back living in Eorzea again.” Realizing that what she has said might be offensive to a Kugane citizen she immediately adds, “Nothing against your beautiful city... it’s really a wonderful sight... but home is where the heart is, yes?”

Have you ever almost died? "Yes.”, she says, lifting a finger towards the scar over her right eye, a long and nasty burn scar, starting at her forehead, crossing the eye, and ending on her cheek. “The Calamity was a test for all of us, right?”

Do you have a secret, not just a secret, but like a really big secret hardly anyone knows? “Gosh, i hope not, and if there was i wouldn’t tell you, right... cos it wouldn’t be a secret anymore...”, there’s a certain glint in her eyes, even a hint of a threat to not ask about this anymore ever again. For a short moment the right eye glows in a faint orange.

Salty or sweet? “Sorry, I’m a cook... i love all the flavours... you can do so much with them.” she seems very happy now that the interviewer got the hint about the secret thing.

Do you like yourself? “Pretty much, yes... I used to think low of myself, but time, and love, and foremost my most wonderful husband Ilwe’ran, them changed this for the better.”

Do you believe in the Twelve? She sternly nods, leaving no doubt that she does. "I do, fervently. Above all i believe in Menphina, my patron deity. But, i don’T advertise, and i certainly don’t think less of them who don’t believe. Religion is and should always be a personal thing. And definitely nothing to wage war about.” 

Are you religious? “I think I just answered that as well.”, she says, with a nodding smile.”You can’t really be in doubt about it, right?”

Do you carry prejudice with you? Sighing again she nods, a small shadow, just for a moment, crossing her eyes. “Sadly, i do... and though it got better, and I was shown kindness where least expected, i am not very fond of Lalafell, and Elezen always gives me frights. Also, i will never trust most anything Uldah fully, I beleive, though it pains me to admit that.”

What do you consider entertainment? “Watching my children play, or sitting with my husband in a window, either reading a book each on their own, or to each other. I like quiet entertainment. ever was much of a party goer... for reasons.”

Favourite drink? “Milk... especially when mixed with Rolanberries and maybe yoghurt.”

Do you have any family traditions? “Oh, gods, too many to mention... being from one Clan and having joined another, there’s a whole mix of them, all important.” she lifts her left hand, pointing and the purple stripe across here face and eyes. “See this, it’s one of them, and please don’t ask me to explain... it’s too much for a short conversation.”

Are you a good person?

She tilts her head to her right, thinking about this one for a moment.“I’m alright...”, she finally answers, but then adds, “...but anyone do anything to my family, and I’ll become a nightmare.”

Thank you for answering my questions. “Oh?”, she says, on the one hand surprised that this is already over, on the other quite happy no more personal questions seem to lie in ambush here. When the strange interviewer then just turns and vanishes into the crowd she is left baffled, and finally mumbles to herself, “Kugane.. there are surely many strange things here... i really need to ask about the manners and customs here... I hope i didn’t offend him”.

Tagged by: @high-stakes-gambler Tagging: @nightmaze, @xmimiteh, @neoma-eltanin, @pettankoprincess; @blodforblod, @syerraffxiv, @dewdlepies, @pervasivescariness, and anyone who would enjoy this. Was really fun, thank you for tagging

And the amazing art was done by @luciasatalina, and gifted to me as a birthday present by @nightmaze

[barbosaasouza]

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Character Profiles: Ice Climbers

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is the latest entry in Nintendo's ongoing premier platform fighter series. It's also slated to be the company's biggest release of the holiday season. After almost 20 years of battle between top characters of some of gaming's biggest franchises, Ultimate will bring together every single fighter from every Smash Bros. game to date (along with a few more) in one single game.

With so many characters to choose from, Shacknews is taking a look at each and every one of the Super Smash Bros. Ultimate characters individually, leading up to the game's big release on December 7. Because many aspects of the game are subject to change, including character damage and special move properties, these profiles should not be considered final and can be updated at any time. Any guide that has been updated will be clearly marked.

Here's what we have up so far: #01 - Mario #38 - Sonic #64 - Inkling

Today, we look back at a long-awaited return to the Super Smash Bros. roster.

Who are Ice Climbers?

Back when they were first announced for Super Smash Bros. Melee, the Ice Climbers felt like an unorthodox pick for a couple of reasons. The first reason being that they were a fairly obscure selection from a classic NES game of the same name. The other reason is that Popo & Nana were a tandem fighter, with players primarily controlling Popo and Nana playing backup. Little did anyone know that the Ice Climbers were ahead of their time. Smash fighters would get more obscure and would get more gimmicky as time went on.

So who are Popo & Nana? They're intrepid mountain climbers in parkas who encounter a variety of dangers along their path to the summit. Those dangers include evil furballs, birds, and a white polar bear sporting summer shorts and sunglasses. (It was the 8-bit era, things got a little weird.) Dodging falling icicles, Popo & Nana use their trusty mallets to climb to the top of each mountain and win the day.

The Ice Climbers are an admitted deep cut, but nobody is going to argue their effectiveness in the Super Smash Bros. world, where they quickly became favorites right up until they were left off the Smash 4 roster.

Ice Climbers' Moves and Fighter Overview

The Ice Climbers are interesting, in that they're the only tandem fighter in the game. And one of the peskiest things about them in Melee was their ability to "wobble," or perform an inescapable chain grab that would kill almost every time. But rejoice (or despair, if you're one of those wobblers) because the wobble is gone forever!

Yes, only Popo will perform a grab now, as Nana stands in the background. That means Ice Climber players can grab and throw or grab and bash for a limited window, just like every other character in the game. The playing field has been leveled.

Here are the Ice Climbers' special moves:

Ice Shot (Neutral B): The Ice Climbers will shoot out ice blocks that travel along the ground. In mid-air, they'll go straight down. If they catch opponents with their hammers, they'll do additional damage.

Belay (Up B): The two Ice Climbers will use a rope to toss the other into the air, giving a major aerial boost. If Nana is gone, this becomes much less effective.

Squall Hammer (Side B): Both Ice Climbers team up and swing their hammers horizontally for multiple hits, with the last one hitting for knockback. It can also be used for recovery and, in fact, is Popo's only means of recovery if Nana has been taken out.

Blizzard (Down B): Both Ice Climbers blow frosty breath towards their opponents and will occasionally freeze them solid with this move. While it was possible to blow in two directions in previous games, Blizzard now only goes in one direction, increasing damage at the expense of backside coverage.

Iceberg (Final Smash): The Ice Climbers summon an icy mountain, which freezes any opponents who touch it solid. The frozen foes will then tumble off the mountain and often fall to their doom with no way to recover.

The Ice Climbers are much more honest this time around. It isn't just that Nana won't help when Popo reaches for a grab, but when Popo is grabbed himself, she won't help anymore. She'll just stand there and watch. Some help she is, right?

Fortunately, the Ice Climbers are a tough out, hitting very hard and dealing heavy damage… when they're together! Moves like the Squall Hammer will hit for heavy damage, as will their Down-Smash. Their mallets get some great range, but if any opposition gets close, freeze them up with Blizzard. Blizzard is noticeably more effective than it was in the Melee days, despite it no longer being multi-directional, and can freeze opponents for longer periods. Take advantage of this and set them up for a big knockdown.

Whatever happens, though, keep Nana alive. More than ever, Popo is severely handicapped without Nana around and is easily dispatched without her.

Esports Observations

There seems to be some positive buzz for Ice Climbers so far, particularly from the Smash 4 community. Tyrell "NAKAT" Coleman is especially high on the mountain-climbing duo, noting their high damage potential.

Ice Climbers Crazy kill potential Strong damage output Dsyncs are still possible Chaingrabs impossible Uair has a diff animation and is a kill setup out of dthrow...like a hooh hah Very fun still! I think they are solid!!! SAVE NANA

— NAKAT (@CLGNAKAT_) June 12, 2018

But let's address the elephant in the room. What's everyone's reaction to the wobble fix? Let's start with Michael "Nintendude" Brancato, noting the benefit of the Ice Climbers' aerials:

ICs can't roll or spot dodge desync, but I can desync out of pivot forward smash. Also, their aerials have almost no landing lag. Uair is changed to an upwards hammer swing.

— Michael Brancato (@NintendudeSSB) June 12, 2018

And the man who invented the wobble in the first place? What does Robert "Wobbles" Wright think? The jury's out, but look for a verdict after EVO.

gonna be ICs at Evo by the way, we'll see what happens

— PGFX Wobbles (@PG_Wobbles) July 19, 2018

The wobble fix is about more than just removing an infinite grab, though. It's about making Nana overall less useful in certain situations. That's something Ice Climbers players will have to account for going forward.

Nana seems a lot worse for Ice Climbers

— Larry Lurr (@LarryLurr) June 13, 2018

Griffin "Fatality" Miller is certainly looking forward to a more even playing field.

So, with techable footstools, regrab timers still applicable, and SDI, we may finally have an Ice Climbers without an infinite, which honestly sounds really interesting to watch/play against. Here's hoping!

— Griffin Miller @Smashcon next (@FatalityFalcon) June 14, 2018

Without wobbling, moves like Blizzard are more vital than ever. But also, there's taking advantage of the potential of desyncing the two characters to attack separately. Here's Julian "Jtails" Martinez to explain.

And lastly, on the lighter end, there is one final thing to note about the Ice Climbers, this observation from Chris "falln" Rugg.

Ice climbers still cant CLIMB the ICE in their final smash. Biggest complaint of smash ultimate free

— falln until PGRv5 (@fallnaway) June 14, 2018

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate is set to arrive in December on Nintendo Switch. Shacknews will continue looking into each of the game's characters from now through the big day, so be sure to come back for more breakdowns over the coming weeks. Need impressions on the game as a whole? Check out our recent hands-on from San Diego Comic-Con.

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate Character Profiles: Ice Climbers published first on https://superworldrom.tumblr.com/

[moderncavepictures]

Dispatch From 65˚ South

What goes through the mind of those lunatic Polar Bear divers who jump into freezing waters? I now know. Nothing, because it’s too cold to think. Your thoughts freeze. I was mandated to go big*. Just ahead my friend Rosalee jumped in cheerfully while double fist-pumping the air. Her smile was the width of a three-lane highway as she shrieked with delight. It was the second time that day her and I had pierced the frosty, iceberg laden surface of Antarctic waters (after she had fallen in paddle-boarding, I jumped in for solidarity). She has made me famous by telling the entire ship. Also, Rosalee is a four foot, hundred pound, seventy-four years young blazing comet of good energy. She also just invited me to SoCal to go paddle-boarding, an invitation I’m inclined to accept.

*Went for the backflip.

“Why are you going to Antarctica?” We’ve all asked each other on the ship and it is the most common question I get from friends and family. I admit, my answer has changed. Previously, I had a canned answer or two about visiting all seven continents or having seen a friend’s pictures. Now I can firmly answer. I came because Antarctica is pure fucking MAGIC. Some of you perhaps know about my magic curating prowess. I have at least the desire to find it, harness it, extrapolate its properties to possibly recreate it or, dare I dream, to carry a bit of it with me. If I had a bottle that held magic, I’d fill it a little bit each time like one does with sand from different beaches, until it was on the verge of bursting. Then I’d drink it and a couple of magical hours later I’d shit magic all over everything. Can you do that with a bottle? Perhaps I’d need a lamp (to keep the magic in, not to shit in).

Antarctica could fill a sixer of magical lamp-bottles. The scope of it all, the light, the color palette, the wildlife, are majestic. Life is earned here through a millennia or two of deliberate evolution. They still discover new penguin colonies that no one knew existed, deep in the heart of the ice plateau. Standing on the deck of the ship, leaning over the rail, one’s mind wanders quite easily. What the hell were people thinking? Navigating these coasts in tall-ships with the sun and the stars as guides seems lunacy. Awesome, amazing lunacy I’ll grant, but still certifiable henhouse level crazy. And I suppose we’re all a bit crazy too. I’ll ask Rosalee, though I expect I know her answer.

The first day was just ridiculous. It started with the last minute program change to include SUP — stand up paddle boarding. Our guide Meghan is a super hip West Virginian who owns a SUP and surf shop. Both her and Abbey, driving the support zodiac, were keen to get us out on the water for one of the coolest things I’ve ever done. The peace on a paddle board to experience the wondrous Antarctic panorama is without comparison. Seals came up to investigate and then play with me. We spotted a leopard seal. Rosalee later involuntarily jumped in, I joined. While the rest of the ship explored Mikkelsen Harbour, the eight of us got lost among icebergs.

Later we had a planned zodiac cruise and then a landing. Everyone had their fingers crossed for weather to hold to step on the continent. I couldn’t have cared less after what we experienced in the zodiac. Cierva Cove is a huge area and we lucked out to have Marla and Nick driving us around (zodiacs go out in pairs for a safety and such — so two boats). They took us off the beaten path. Growing up with a woodsman father one apparently gleans certain gifts. I remember a moment in Alaska on a family vacation. I was 11 or 12, I think. We were driving though a forest animal sanctuary and my Pops slams on the breaks and jumps out of the car. Notorious for spotting animals, we all followed suit. There was nothing. My Dad, quitting at the ridges in the distance said he saw a Grizzly Bear. Y’all, there was nothing up there. Other cars were stopping, under the impression we had stumbled upon a find. Anyway, sure enough, a speck about the size of a cane sugar granule was making way across the distant slopes. It was a bear, though the memory that lasts was his sniper-like knack for discovering its presence in the first place. So it was that a glint of tail-flick, a leathery glare of light, a black backdrop in a blue and white world all caught my eye at the exact same moment and I knew it was a whale. I had been projecting it mentally moments earlier (as has been weirdly happening lately, most recently with fried chicken — Ill keep you updated on this). Nick cruised ahead, b-lining for the position I’d witnessed. I had erred, but only in the direction I thought it was moving. Clearing the final ice berg, we found ourselves in the same square nautical mile of roughly eight to ten feeding Humpback Whales. They were extremely friendly, show-offs even, and they hung around all morning surfacing, blowing, flipping their enormous fins. One surfaced roughly fifty feet from our zodiac, throwing us a look that said she (I’m guessing) was unimpressed with our size. Our solitary afternoon with new, fat friends, it was unforgettable.

Days like this come around once in a great while, when every minute is stuffed with activity. And the conclusion of this one came to fruition with the polar plunge. As described earlier, fifty-four of us went for the big chill, and fifty-four came out with faces in burning, existential shock. Without doubt, the coldest water I’ve ever touched was this day. For those who haven’t participated, it’s exhilarating (and apparently good for your heart, lungs and sex life).

The next day we went went on a zodiac cruise and landing to Cuverville Island. It stunk something fierce. Penguins don’t shit magic, they shit guano. It is truly a horrific sensory perception and just a shameful thing to do your nose. And I’m partially smell-blind. I cant imagine what people with full olfactory capability were experiencing. Admittedly, thankfully, after ten minutes it dissipates. My favorite part of this location anyway, was not the Gentoo Penguin colony (still cool), but the ice. The ice was palatial. Opulent blue ice bergs littered the bay and speckled the water as far the eye allowed. They appear as castles, mansions, everyday objects like giant salt shakers and blocks of cheese. The scope is overwhelming. The visual stimulation is demanding. It’s sensory overload. So I meditated. In just ten minutes, I had actualized the moment much more effectively. I heard sea birds above I hadn’t noticed. Caught the soft crackling of the ice - think the sound of sparklers - as air, possibly trapped 500,000 years ago, escaped their tired pockets. I got surrounded by the pitter-patter of chicks chasing their mothers for a snack. No penguins were staring back at me upon completion this time. But there were ten of the yellow humans taking pictures of me, so I felt like a penguin.

Which would be a really funny promotional video for this expedition company. What if people behaved toward other people like they do with rare and isolated animals. Imagine eating dinner and looking up to discover twenty people, all dressed exactly the same, are huddled in a group and all maniacally taking photos of you. Or you’re taking a shit, you hear a guide say “now we must be very quite so as to not disturb the human”, and then the door opens to the bathroom and click, click, click, click, click. The thought continues. We all saw two penguins making sexy time and there were definitely photos taken. Is that penguin porn? Wait, don’t answer.

Finally. we made a continental landing. At Neko Harbour, a former Argentine summer outpost, we touched the mainland of the Antarctic continent. Although, we all consider the islands as part of the continent, I think there was a consideration that being able to walk to the South Pole — if one were so inclined — was a special acknowledgement. The most intriguing aspect in my perspective was that we had to zodiac in three nautical miles to the beach because the ship could not advance to to heavy ice. I love that shit. Antarctica is my JAM in this way. Neko sat surrounded by a cove and a glacial ice shelf that was roaring to be let loose in the water. Each time, a thunderous clamour would rumble from beneath the ice and break off a chunk into the sea. Finally the big shards gave way to a block the size of a mansion releasing itself into the cove, sending decent sized waves reverberating onto our beach and outward into the small gulf. So much power exists in nature here, and it’s simple to realize that only by living with the elements, instead of against them, can one survive.

We’ve had two full days at sea crossing the Drake Passage, seen as a right of passage for those visiting the continent. The fist day was not forgiving. The evening prior, we toasted our farewell and were joined by a squad of Orca Whales, escorting us out of the channel. I was asked to co-DJ the dance party that ensued and subsequently drank way too much (also, they top off your wine at dinner so one never knows how much they are drinking). The next morning ion the Drake was brutal. We had the biggest, hardest seas so far. My hangover intensified, heightening the effects of the “Drake Shake.” I had previously been the model sailor. However, I was able to digest the trip that day, if nothing else. And as my roommate Brian suggested, if I were to go down any day, it may as well have been a foggy sea day. Tomorrow we disembark in Ushuaia, returning to civilization for the first time in two weeks. I’ll be glad for reentry into the lives of friends and family. Nonetheless, I will regard our little ship community as a period to be missed, and to be remembered.

I’m excited to share what I’ve seen to anyone who will want to listen. And what a fantastic feeling that is.