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bubblyhoney · 3 years

Note

can i request a fic where sapnap takes the reader to his hometown? like the classic going to places he went to when he was younger. maybe playgrounds and ice cream shops idk

places i used to go

warnings: language of course, an allusion to virginap, my uneducated guess of what sapnap was like in highschool, tiny detail of long haired!sapnap, singular canon detail of underage drinking, jokish about marriage

tags: sapnap x gn!reader

words: 2191

A/N: you are a god, anon. i love comfy and nostalgic fics like these and it was so fun to write. if you hate it dont tell me but if you like it lemme know akskdjd

inbox/requests: open

The wind whips fast on your bare fingers, cool and quick and raising goosebumps in its wake. You blink in the haze of the early sunset, head lolled to the side of the headrest. It feels good.

“That’s where I went to high school.” Sapnap interrupts your thoughts and points a finger at a collection of tall brick buildings down a side street. The silver of the lettering is dull, but you can still feel the nostalgia.

“And you’re about to see the park that me and my friends used to hang out at after work and—actually, nevermind.” His arm drops to the middle console and he looks straight ahead with slightly pinker cheeks.

“Do what?” You ask, voice all sweet, and a grin grows on your face. You turn towards him and wiggle your eyebrows.

“Nothing. Homework.” He avoids your eye contact and hikes his hand up higher on the steering wheel. “Anyways— Do you want to get some food before we head out? I know a great place.”

You two were just coming to a close on your little trip to visit his family; it was his step-mom’s birthday and you decided to make a week of it. It was your first long-term trip with Sapnap, and also your first time meeting his dad’s side of the family. You were proud to say she loved you. His little sister took a little more effort to talk to you of her own volition, but soon enough she was on your side.

You have a couple hours to kill before making your flight back home, so Sapnap has taken it upon himself to give you a quick tour of his hometown.

“Yeah,” you decide, bottom lip popped out. “Can we get ice cream after?”

“Uh, duh.” The Neighbourhood’s Stargazing starts through the speakers and he reaches to turn it down. “I’m so ready to get home and sleep.” He stretches his neck in his seat, letting out an uncharacteristically inappropriate grunt when his bones pop. You make a disgusted face, nose wrinkling, but stretch your own back, slumping down in the seat. The day had been full of packing up and this horrible hike his dad liked to do early in the mornings, so you two were pretty beat.

“Okay, we’re here,” he announces three sleepy minutes later in his best attempt at a whisper. Lifting your head off of the corner of your seat, you blink in the setting sunlight as a yawn splits your face. “You’re so cute.”

“Shut up,” you mumble, and struggle to get your seatbelt off in that post-nap haze. You’d barely been asleep for thirty seconds, damn it. The air is a swampy heat when you step out of the car onto rocky gravel and nearly twist your ankle climbing over the curb. Sapnap catches you by the lower back, trying to hide his laugh but failing miserably. You slide him a dirty look, smacking his shoulder as hard as you can manage while limping towards the front entrance.

The door jingles when you two breach the doorway, alerting a bored-looking hostess that the circus has arrived. She looks at Sapnap a second longer than she should, eyebrows screwed together in silent confusion. But she leads the two of you to a booth near a large window, handing you sticky menus and promptly fucking right off to the host station. She nearly runs.

“Do you know her?” You ask, inconspicuously hiding your face in the search for their 24/7 breakfast menu. You feel his eyes on you.

“Don’t think so.” He leans on one elbow and slides his phone out of his jeans’ pocket. In the 25 seconds it takes for you to find their french toast and sides menu, he has browsed and closed his phone with an animatedly shocked look on his face.

“What?” You give him a weird look and put down the menu.

“I totally went to homecoming with that girl.” He eyes the hostess. You glance over at her again, meeting her gaze, and offer a polite smile. She turns away quickly, eyes wide.

“She’s cute,” you say, voice high and fake, and he drums his fingers on the tabletop as an amused look makes its way onto his face.

“Are you—?”

“What?” You reply right back.

“Nothing.”

Thank God the server comes up to your table then and starts asking for drink orders, or else you’d have to admit (sheepishly) you were a tiny eensy-weensy bit annoyed. Only a tad. But after requesting a Dr. Pepper and a water the conversation surrounding the nervous-looking hostess dies.

“I’m so hungry I think I feel my stomach shrinking.” You flop your head onto your arm on the table top and make a whiny noise into the stack of napkins your server left at the table. Sapnap rubs his thumb into the side of your forearm, touch warm and nearly dissolving the pangs of hunger and jealousy.

“You weren’t hungry an hour ago.” He lifts your hand to his face and plants a kiss on the back of it. Oh, pulling out the big guns, huh? “I would have made you something.”

You tilt onto your chin, pouting, and stare up at his cute face. His cute, scruffy, perfectly-kissable face.

“I think I got hungry staring at you for half an hour.” A mischievous grin grows on your previously-petulant face and he just shakes his head.

“I do have that effect,” he admits with cockiness in his tone, lifting his eyebrows and leaning back into the booth with his lips pursed.

The server returns with two glasses and takes your food orders onto their little yellow notepad. You chug the water down when they leave for the kitchen, getting your lap and chin thoroughly wet in the process. Sapnap just snorts at you and shoves the napkins your way.

“So,” you start, patting dry your jeans. “tell me what you were like in high school.” You cross your arms and settle into the booth, smirk on your lips.

“What I was like?” He parrots, sipping at his soda, looking thoughtful. “Firstly, a virgin.” You make a noise. Duh. Dude had a buzz cut his junior year. (You’ve seen the pictures. His step-mom particularly likes them.) “Secondly, I was actually— well, I wasn’t popular, but I had a lot of friends. We were all semi-athletic lonely band kids but we had fun. Had one girlfriend senior year but she went to Cal Tech in the fall and I didn’t. I, um, worked at a Dairy Queen in the summers and gained so much weight I had to lose all over again for Unified Track.”

“Relatable,” you comment, drinking noisily at your water. He fiddles with the paper straw wrapper and crunches it up into a ball. It goes soaring into your drink with a quiet “Kobe” and you just give him a look. He smiles toothily right back at you. “Stop being cute, I’m trying to listen to your story.”

“Oh, my bad,” he mocks. “Anyways. That’s what I was like in highschool.” You fish the paper ball out of your water and flick it wetly at his arm. It sticks and you choke on a laugh, cheeks puffed.

Two plates of warm food are set down loudly onto the table and you thank the server with a surprised smile, Sapnap mirroring you.

Two minutes of wordless chewing passes, minds occupied just by “food, me eat” instead of anything related to your previous conversation. You realize that Sapnap is one of the loudest chewers ever, and he realizes that you fail to notice the streak of maple syrup in your hair.

“C’mere,” he mumbles through a mouthful of omelet and hash browns and beckons you with his hand. You lean closer, chewing slowly, as he pats a napkin at the strands of hair trapped in syrup.

“Thanks, baby.” You take the napkin from him and pause your assault of the warm french toast before you to clean the sticky sugar out of your hair. He just watches you, half of a smile on his lips.

You two finish your food in record time. It’s borderline vacuum-like. There’s a short grace period where you just sit like two lazy cats, slumped down in the booth and holding your full stomachs. But the check comes soon after, and you both pay your way and are out of the restaurant without any mad dashes for the bathroom. A miracle, really, because of the American-like amount of butter you both consume.

“I’m a much more functional person now,” you mutter into the cotton of his shoulder, swinging your hand in his. He just hums in agreement.

“I guess we’re not getting ice cream, then,” he teases, and you just groan in response.

“I don’t feel like having diarrhea on a plane, unfortunately.” You sigh heavily when you have to split and get into your respective sides of the rental car.

The entire trip (somewhat roundabout because of the amount of side quests to show you things from his childhood) to the airport Sapnap is a chatterbox. He’s like this when he has sugar: either bouncing off the walls with energy or talking your ear off.

“That’s where my dad proposed to my step-mom. I was kinda young but I remember being surprised at how big the ring was— dude broke the bank for her.” It’s a little gazebo you catch a glimpse of through the trees in a park. It probably was an incredibly picturesque moment, and you can sense how much she must have loved it. With just meeting them this weekend, you can already see how much love those two have for each other.

You hope people can see how much you love Sapnap.

“Oh my God, it’s still there.” He points out the side of your window to what looks like a Dairy Queen that has been through World War 3. “My buddy Eric and I once spilled a gallon of that liquid ice-cream-shit all over the men’s bathroom.”

You shoot him a horrified look. “Why was it in the bathroom?”

He just smirks.

“—And that’s my Uncle Ron’s house. Had my first beer there.”

“And last, hopefully,” you add, pulling a disgusted face. The two story bungalow is cute, and one of your favorite colors: olive green. “That shit is nasty.”

He just shrugs and continues down the side street.

“Is this the park you were talking about?”

He pulls into the gravelly parking lot of a small clearing of tall trees, a picnic table and campfire sat squat in the middle. But he doesn’t respond, just turning the car off and climbing out. He reaches the passenger door without speaking, and opens it for you. You climb carefully out, confused.

“Come on.” He takes your hand and starts for a small path to the left of the picnic table. The mid-sunset shade envelopes the both of you.

“I hope this isn’t where you kill me.”

“No,” he snorts. “I just wanted to show you something.”

It’s just a few moments of stumbling through the damp underbrush before you’re coming face to face with a small, mossy pond that sits right underneath an incredibly old willow tree. He stops right on the edge of the rocky path and turns toward you.

“This your make out spot?” You ask between a grin as he snakes an arm around your waist and tugs you flush to him. Your innocent smile fades when you feel the press of his lips to the side of your neck, light and ticklish. Oh.

“No,” he murmurs, and just breathes you in. “I came here once—the night before I graduated highschool. And I told myself when I really really loved someone I’d take them here with me.” He sways with you in his grasp, a gentle and song-less dance.

You grip his shoulder tighter in your hand and lean into him.

“That’s— awfully romantic, huh?” Your voice is quiet. Almost nervous. He just makes a noise of agreement.

“So here we are.” His voice is the opposite of yours, all strong and confident.

You two just move together for a moment. The sun breaks through the tree canopy, shining bright orange down onto the glassy surface of the pond. Crickets and frogs chirp back and forth as the willow vines swing in a cool evening breeze. You watch nature come alive around you, suddenly grateful for the man in your arms.

“Don’t propose,” you whisper, breaking the gentle tension. A laugh breaks the silence and he’s pulling away to look at you. Maybe in disbelief. A strand of hair falls into his eyes and you brush it away, fingers stilling on his temple and sliding down onto his cheek. Stubble scrapes against the skin of your palm and he stares at you through those meadow eyes.

You realize in that moment that he is exactly himself. Of course he is. He’s Sapnap, and everything that encompasses that. Dark and light and fiery and cool. He always has been, and always will be.

You realize you wouldn’t mind if he proposed.

A/N: ask or send me some stuff!! requests, rants, anything. let me know what you think

#sapnap #mcyt #sapnap x gn!reader #sapnap x reader #sapnap x you #sapnap fluff #sapnap drabble #sapnap one shot #sapnap oneshot #mcyt x reader #mcyt x you #honey answers #my lovely anon #sapnap fanfic #bubblyhoneyfics

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whumpurr · 3 years

Text

Adrien and Sawdust part 6

cw: pet whump, whump recovery, bodily mutilation, self harm, brief and vague mention of past noncon, dehumanization, conditioned whumpee, unreliable narrator, brief mention of dissociation

masterlist

Sawdust was searching for his bag the second Master was gone. He hopped out of bed, punctuated with a fit of dizziness as he got to his feet, and crawled around the room looking for his duffel bag. The bright blue bag was nowhere to be found, and Sawdust wasn’t great at seeing in the dark either.

He started to wonder, to second guess himself. Did Master put the bag somewhere in the room and Sawdust just isn’t seeing it? Is he overlooking it? Did he even have a bag at all? Did it come with him to this new house, or was it left with his previous master? No, no, he remembered seeing it next to his kennel with those other people.

If he left the room now, Master would surely hear it and question him, or worse, punish him for disturbing his sleep. As much as Sawdust wanted his ears back, he just had to trust that Master would return them in due time.

Sleeping was difficult without the familiar squeeze of his headband around his head, but with a full stomach he managed to eventually fall asleep even if it took a while.

Sunlight came all too soon for Sawdust. The light peeked through the curtains and he couldn’t physically sleep any more. He was dreading going downstairs and having to face his master, having to eat beside him. He could only imagine what his master was going to do to him. Would he record him? Bring his friends over and show him how pathetic and stupid he looked eating out of a bowl on the floor? Sawdust shook himself out of his thoughts; he was just a dog anyways, he shouldn’t have enough of an ego to be embarrassed.

He was getting himself out of bed, going down onto his hands and knees when he heard a soft knock on the door, followed by Master’s quiet voice.

“Sawdust?” Master said from the other side of the heavy wooden door. “Come on, let’s go get some food.”

Sawdust got to the door and opened it with his paw, stepping out and following Master.

Master gave him a bowl of dog food once he was downstairs. Sawdust half contemplated asking Master about his ears, but really, if Master had taken them away then it was because Sawdust did not deserve them any more.

“Master,” Sawdust murmured, “Is- is there anything your pet can- can do? To assist?”

Master looked thoughtful for a moment then laughed, laughed at Sawdust.

“I think my work stuff is a bit advanced for you,” Master took a bite of his own food, “I want you to focus on… recovery, for now. Okay? That means you rest up and come get me if you want anything, food, water, whatever.”

Sawdust nodded, “Yes, Master,” before he continued eating, the hard kibble crunching satisfyingly between his teeth. He couldn’t work up the courage to ask Master about the ears or his bag, or where they’ve gone.

Lunch and dinner went similarly, with Master coming, getting his pet, and taking him downstairs to eat. Each time Sawdust couldn’t work himself up enough to ask Master about his ears. The lack of his ears made Sawdust feel… Wrong. Like he wasn’t a real dog, like he was a subpar pet. He wasn’t good enough to this new Master who had otherwise been so kind to him. What had he done to deserve this?

Night eventually fell, and Sawdust did his best to do as Master said and get to sleep. He curled up in the nest of blankets and pillows that his Master had made in the corner for him, and let himself begin to drift off. As he was doing so, he couldn’t help but wonder why his Master was withholding his belongings from him. Nevertheless, his eyelids grew heavy, and he eventually fell into a deep sleep.

Adrien was still getting accustomed to feeding someone using a dog bowl, with dog food, on the floor. It was a strange experience, and doing it made him feel dirty, but it was all Sawdust was going to accept so if it was between that or making the pet starve again, he would have to go with the former.

He was still very aware of just how lost he was in all of this. He searched the internet and scoured his social media for something that could give him some kind of life preserver in all of this. Finally, finally, he found something. A chatroom for pet owners. From the looks of it, it was heavily moderated and geared more towards pet liberation activists, and pet rehabbers, and people who actually cared for their pets. He requested to join and was accepted within the hour. He immediately sent a message to the ‘help’ section.

Adrien: >> Hey guys, I’m a new owner and I didn’t do as much research as I should have. >> Long story short, I didn’t keep as close an eye on my pet as I should’ve, and he ended up not eating because I wasn’t giving him dog food. Is that a normal thing? How can I help him?

It wasn’t five minutes before one of the other owners responded,

1Y4N4: >> oof, thats no good dude.. definitely watch him harder and probably just stick to feeding him what he wants for now. u said hes new right? let him stay in his comfort zone for a little bit probably

Adrien: >> Thanks. I’ll do that.

1Y4N4: >> np, im a bit more experienced as an owner but i dont think mine were as conditioned as urs >> at least not in that way

Zo: >> Bro wtf? You’re the source of your pet’s whole life and shit, you really should’ve done more research.

Adrien sat and watched as this ‘Zo’ person continued to rip into Adrien for his irresponsibility, though the ‘1Y4N4’ user at least tried to defend Adrien. It wasn’t long before Zo quieted down and 1Y4N4 was able to speak up again,

1Y4N4: >> lots of actual dogs eat things that arent dog chow >> maybe show your pet some videos of people feeding their dogs other stuff, maybe hell be more open then

Adrien thanked the user, and used the rest of his evening compiling some videos and researching, finding the outer bounds of what dogs could eat in hopes that he could convince Sawdust. It was far from exactly what he wanted, but he felt some semblance of satisfaction that there was at least a way to progress forwards.

Sawdust finally came up with a plan when he was coming out of the bathroom the next morning. It was before Adrien had gotten up. As Sawdust was leaving the bathroom, he caught sight of himself in the mirror.

His hair was all matted, and the fringe at his forehead was beginning to grow to hide his eyes. He looked lacking without his ears. There were deep circles under his eyes. At least the peaks of his cheeks and his lips were starting to regain some color now that he had a steady supply of food which he undoubtedly did not deserve. The scratched scar across his nose bridge and cheek that one of the other dogs gave him was still there. He looked at that and followed it across his face to his second ears.

His dumb second ears, the ones on either side of his head that his last master hated so much. His previous master had always told him that they made him look less like a dog, less like a pet, when a pet was all Sawdust ever wanted to be. Because if he wasn’t a pet, then he was a toy for both Master and the other dogs, and that was one step above the most reprehensible thing he could be. He had been downgraded to ‘toy’ for a short amount of time previously, and he was eternally grateful that he was never dropped even lower, to being nothing but food for the other dogs.

Master threatened that sometimes, chopping him up and feeding him to the other dogs.

Whenever Sawdust looked at himself in the mirror, he couldn’t help imagine it. Being cut up and thrown to other animals to eat. He found some part of himself that felt that- even if he could never do anything else right- he could do that right. He tried to halt that train of thought as quickly as he could, before his mind shunted him off to some dark, foggy place where he couldn’t think or feel until the bad thoughts went away.

But at the root of those thoughts, he found the problem, as well as the solution. He scrambled down to the kitchen as fast as he could go, wanting to work quickly before he could stop himself.

He got to the kitchen sink, and stood up on trembling, unused legs. They could hardly support his weight, he had to lean onto the granite countertop with his elbows as he reluctantly removed the tape from his paws using his teeth. He would need his fingers for this.

Sawdust’s breath was quick in his throat, the edges of his vision grew blurry as he tried to focus on this and only this. He had one task and he was not going to fail it. He wanted his ears back. He wanted his master to be happy with him again. Maybe this way he could earn his master’s attention and... Maybe even his affection, if a pet was allowed to hope.

Sawdust’s paws were shaky and clumsy as they took out the biggest knife out of the wooden blog. It was heavy and cold in his paw. With one paw he held the tip of one of his second ears and pulled it as far away from his head as he could.

The cold edge of the blade rested on his skin, at the valley between his second ear and his head. He squeezed his eyes shut, he couldn’t break down now, he couldn’t stop now. He took a deep, sharp breath and pressed down on the knife as hard as his feeble paws could.

Adrien shot out of bed to the sound of a piercing, howling scream from downstairs.

taglist: @starnight-whump @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi@neuro-whump @whump-me-all-night-long @cupcakes-and-pain @whumpzone @whumpcreations @dancinglifeboat @pinkraindropsfell @looptheloup @cowboy-anon @meetmeinhellcroutons @thingsthatgo-whump-inthenight @firewheeesky @maracujatangerine

#whump #whump recovery #pet whump #whumpee #whump scenario #whumpblr #whump community #whump writing #whump blog #adrien and sawdust #my writing #whump fic #whump story #pet whumpee

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zuffer-weird-girl · 4 years

Text

Welcome back...

Tartarus was a mess. The world was a mess.

He didn't care. Not one bit. The pain on his forehead was nothing. He had been hitting that door just for someone to finally open his cell for him to get out, as soon as he heard the commotion that was happening on that prison.

He wasn't the same anymore. His pride long forgotten as he could only mutter 'father' in a state of desperation as he saw the chaos and tried to run.

His arms were missing but his legs weren't. So he ran as fast as he could. Leaving the prison as well as a bunch of criminals.

God... now that he knew it how much he fucking ruined his life... He didn't even know if the Shie Hassaikai was still working after his left. Oh who was he kidding..? Pops was in coma as he the supposed sucessor of the yakusa was arrested.

He heard the screams and shouts as he ran. The chaos was established... this was Shigaraki's plan? He didn't know neither could care at the moment.

He walked in a state of shock and traumatized as he started to see the city over a few kilometers away... Tartarus was located 5km away from the mainland and he was a tad bit impressed on how much he could run still after those hellish months he had to endure on that place.

It was the dead of the night, almost midnight he guessed, when he dragged his feet at the desert street. Maybe the city was in a state of lockdown after the prisoners of Tartarus escaped...

No single soul was in that street, walking in a state of misery. He could feel the drop of blood slidding down from the middle of his forehead to his chin... he wanted to at leats wipe it off, but oh with what he would? With the remains of his long lost arms?

He stopped when he recognized the building he once used to live. His eyes widejing as his feet moved before his mind could as he saw that even after months, the walls seemes to be in construction to repare.

He licked his dry lips as he looked at both his sides to ensure none police or hero was nearvy before kicking the door with all his force in desperation.

He stopped dead when the gate opened just a bit to show a gun pointed at his forehead.

"What?" Came a harsh voice as he gulped the thick air stuck on his throat. "What do you want damn freack?!"

"Im... I..." why his voice was horrible and hoarse liek that he didn't know, but he soon got desperate at seing he couldn't even say who the fuck he was.

"Get the fuck out." The old male groaned but Chisaki got his foot in before the man closed the gate, hissing at the sharp pain.

"I'm Chisaki Kai. The adopted son of Pops." He blurted out in panicked pants as the old man eyes widened in horror.

The male opened the gate and reveleaved himself, an old colleague of pops for sure as he checked him form head to toe.

"The one who got arrested? The one that made experiments with my friend's actual granddaughter who is now on care fo heroes?" He asked with venom on his voice as Chisaki felt almost sick to the stomach at hearing but could only nod. "How did you get here? I heard you were locked in Tartarus."

"Tartarus broke down a couple of hours ago... I.. escaped." The male narrowed his eyes at him even more but sighed, opening the gate for him to enter.

"You look like shit. Come in." He swore he almost dropped to his knees at the moment. But tahnks to heavens his legs allowed him to walk enough to enter.

"I have to take you to (L/n)-sama first." He widened his eyes once again as he heard your name being spilled from that man's mouth.

You... you were still here...?

But.. you didn't contacted him. Not even once. Ever since he was arrested he eneber heard of you again.

"Pardon..?" He almost whispered as the male lead him.

"She was your partner, right? (L/n)-sama confirmed that when you were arrested. By our traditions, if the successor or the other boss get arreste don a state of coma." He glared at him whose truly made him want to vomit "The wife or partner of the last boss takes the lead of the said yakusa."

So.. you accepted that..? But he knew you, he knew hwo much you hated his work... why would you-

"Here." He opened the door for him to enter "Take a sit and wait here." He closed the door abruptly making him wince.

The office of Pops... that guy really wanted to torture him. It was almost untouched tha place. Even the couch felt the same as usually would...

He soon perked up when he heard footssteps and standed up the best he could. Almost tripping even.

Pathetic. He was pathetic.

The door opened and he felt his heartbeat stop as appeared, (E/c)'s eyes widening as soon as they saw his figurine standing there... you havent changed a bit. Only for the appearance of someone who has been overworking themselfs to death... face scrunched from nights of crying...

It was a silence and such a tense atmosphere as you both stared at eachother... his eyes burning at seeing you there... he thought he would never see you again...

He saw how you blinked and rubbed your eyes only for you to widen them even more at seing him standing there still.

"K...K-Kai...?" You managed to finally pet out as his heart clenches.

You still called him ny his first name... his true first name.

You stepped closer to him as your hands hovered over his face and widened in horror at finally noticing the missing of his arms...

"What... happened to you? What is this?!" You gestured to both of the rest of his arms and his bruised forehead.

For some reason.. hearing your still concerned tone of voice made him break.. how could you still use that tone of voice with him after what he has done?! After he put his iwn father on coma?! He hadn't heard of you ever since he was arrested and now you were being nice and concerned to him?! Was this some other torture?!

"Kai!" He hadn't notices he had fell into his kness and started to hiperventilate. He could feel your hands on him as you wiped whatever it was falling from his eyes. "Hey! Hey look at me! Kai!"

He wailed. Dropping his face on the crook of your neck. Tears casting down from his eyes like waterfalls as he shouted and sobbed loudly on you. Breath hitching when you hugged his bigger form and brought him closer.

The moment he finally calmed down you parted away from the embrace and helped him up.

"Lets get you clean up, come on." You went to grab his hand but immediately retreading to grab his shoulder.

He could only follow you. Feeling numb and the headache coming from how much he had cried on your arms.

The water was comfortably warm as he finally allowed to drop his shoulders at feeling the water dropping on his body. He was still in his boxers when you helped him up... he didn't even spoke a single word as you touched every part of his body just to help clean himself up since he couldn't even do that. Even surprising himself when you brought him his old clothes.

He couldn't understand... he thought that if you didn't even went to visit him, yomust had to hate him. Despise him for what he had done like everyone else... Luckily he didn't put you on the plans with eru or else the love of his life would be arrested as well.

"A penny for your thoughts?" Your soft voice manifested as he still looked down at the ground from the spot of his old bed.. it was so much comfier than the brick he was forced to.

"... is it because of pity you pushed aside your anger towards me?" His voice was so hoarse and pained himself crunched his face at hearing.

"Pity?" You giggled sadly sitting besides him "Not quite. I-"

"Why then you did all this...? You should had let me die ..." he whispered as your chest clenched at his words.

"Why would i do that with my boyf-"

"Dont. Dont say it. After all I've done you should despise me. Hell, I thought that so after being denied of even a fucking information if you were safe..." he dropped his head befoore hearing a gaso from you.

"What do you mean? I was told by the guards of Tartarus that visits weren't allowed. And I always at least send you a letter, pn your first week when I was denied entry I send you a mask and a letter." You said while arching an eyebrow as he catched what had happened.

"The guards didn't delivered... must have stocked or throw away..." you furrowed your eyebrows but sighed shakily.

Suddenly his breath hitched when you hugged his torso and burried your face against his neck. For the first time he hadn't tensed at sucha coforting touch, but felt warm after so long without it.

"I missed you so much..." you mumbled, wetting his neck with your tears as he clenched his teeth at feeling drops of water falli g from his eyes once again.

"Damn you... I already cried enough didn't I..?" He burried his face in your hair as he allowed to be hugged. For once wishing his arms were back only to pull your body closer to him.

#overhaul x reader #chisaki kai x reader #chisaki kai #overhaul #bnha villains x reader #bnha fanfics #bnha fanfiction #not my best but ok #zuffer writings

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harrysweasleys · 4 years

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a little sunshine never hurt // d.m

Summary: hi alexa!!! if your requests are still open, could i request a draco x reader fic? in it’s the first day of holidays/vacation and the reader and draco are best friends who (obviously) have feelings for the other but think the other doesn’t like them that way, and they’re having a picnic at malfoy manor, relaxing in the sun reading or doing homework and draco just blurts it and confession + kiss?? if you can’t there’s no problem! thanks 🥰💓

Warnings: mentions of food! also v v short but v v sweet (also not proofread/edited so pls dont come @ me)

Word count: 1.9k

a/n: yikes, so completely ignore my message about not posing a fic before christmas because here i am, posting another fic before christmas. hope you all enjoy!!! xx [I DO NOT GIVE CONSENT OR PERMISSION FOR MY WORK TO BE REPOSTED ON ANY OTHER PLATFORM!]

— —

Ah, finally summer break.

The start of the holidays meant that you’d now have a good months time to catch up on rest, relaxation, and obviously, assignments. Though you usually disliked the prospect of doing homework while on vacation, you couldn’t help but feel a little thankful at the fact that you now had something to keep your mind laced on magic while you were away from Hogwarts.

Though you were staying with Draco for the first two weeks — where magic was very much present — you still liked to learn. You liked to keep that ever-growing passion for the magical arts, and you were most likely going to finish every single project within the first week of the break.

Draco, however, had different thoughts.

“Bloody ridiculous,” he scoffed, raising his hand to move his blond bangs out of his face, “Giving out homework while we’re on break? What kind of git does that?”

“Those are your professors, Draco,” you grinned, turning to face him, squinting slightly in the blinding sunlight, “Have a little respect, yeah?”

He rolled his eyes, laying back down on the freshly mowed lawn, his dark clothing most likely scorching his skin under the blazing afternoon sun, “Is giving out homework a show of respect? I don’t think so.”

You leaned up on your elbows, a fresh summer breeze rolling through and pushing your hair over your shoulder. It wasn’t necessarily a cold breeze, but it did cause you to let out a small shiver. Draco’s eyes followed you as you sat up properly, crossing you legs and reaching into the tiny basket that carried your snacks.

He had asked you to share a picnic lunch with him today, which came as a bit of an odd question, to be honest. A picnic? You knew Draco wasn’t the kind of person to ‘enjoy the fresh air’ so it was a little bit of a strange request coming from him, to be honest. But there was no bloody way you’d complain. An outdoor lunch with him meant that you got to spend more time one on one — it meant that you’d get to continue seeing the side of him that he chose not to show anyone else.

He was quite a complex fellow, if you were to be honest. In school, he closed himself off. He hid away from the world and kept his cold exterior up, not daring to let anyone in. You had gotten through to him — after trying for multiple years, of course — but there really was nothing better than seeing him as relaxed as he was when he was home. Maybe ‘relaxed’ isn’t the proper term; but he did have a totally different air. Less arrogant, less obnoxious, and definitely less pompous.

It didn’t help your ever-blossoming crush in the slightest.

“Can you toss me an apple?” he asked, now mimicking your position and crossing his legs as well. His knee brushed against yours, and even though you were both clothed, you felt a jolt of sparks rush through your body.

You let out a small cough to clear your throat, “Sure.”

Completely forgetting whatever it was that you were looking for in the first place, you tossed him the bright green apple that he had insisted on bringing to lunch. You were surprised that the Malfoy family didn’t decide to grow their own apple trees, to be honest, with how often Draco would scavenge the pantries for the perfect one to eat, they’d most likely be better off by growing some in their own vast yard.

“What are your plans for the summer, then?” he asked, taking a big bite, crunching loudly and closing his eyes as he craned his head up to look at the sky.

Your mouth went dry at the sight of him, his defined jawline and smooth neck looking sharper than ever under the bright sunlight, casting shadows around the base of his neck. His platinum hair hurt your eyes to look at, but even then, you’d love nothing more than to run your hands through it. While he rested his head on your lap, while you made out in bed, while you —

“Are you ignoring me?” he snapped your attention back to reality with the low chuckle in his throat.

“No. No, sorry, just got caught in a daydream,” you turned away from him, hiding the growing redness on your cheeks before trying your best to play it off, “I don’t really have plans for the remainder of summer, honestly. Just taking it one day at a time.”

You laid back down on the grass next to him, resting your arm at your side and brushing your fingers against Draco’s. Your heart jolted and you tried to quickly pull your hand away, but you felt his finger twitch against your skin, his pinky finger locking with yours.

It was as if you totally forgot to breathe.

“I’m happy to have you here,” he said softly, placing the unfinished apple down on top of the closed basket, giving you his undivided attention, “I’m gonna miss you when you leave.”

You could hardly think straight, but you couldn’t give in to his charm that easily. He’d only tease you for the rest of the break, wouldn’t he? But, it was hard not to give in. His finger was awfully soft locked with yours, and you could feel both the heat from his body next to you, on top of your own body temperature spiking. It was way too warm to be in the sunshine.

“I’m happy to be here, too,” you replied, voice awfully quiet. You were almost sure he didn’t hear you, but the way that his hand gave yours a little squeeze, you knew that he did.

You two were often on the same page, it was rare he didn’t know exactly how you were feeling. And it was rare that you didn’t know exactly how he was feeling. Right now was one of those rare moments. You couldn’t tell if he was honestly just pleased to have you here — mostly to help him deal with his pain in the ass father — or if this was something more. More than friendship, more than just... platonic. You couldn’t tell what he was feeling and it was driving you absolutely bonkers.

How could you even begin to ask him? Could you even ask? How would that go?

“Hey, Draco, I think I like you.” Pathetic, really. What a way to embarrass yourself.

You felt his hand give yours another squeeze, “You alright?”

Turning to face him, you thought that it was now or never. When would you get another moment of privacy with him like this? Where you could tell him the truth without the possibility of being overheard?

To weight the pros and cons; if he felt the same, you guys could get the next little while together before going your separate ways for the remainder of the holidays. But if he didn’t, you’d have to deal with the brutal awkwardness of spending the next ten days with him, knowing that your feelings were one sided. Then, you’d have to see him again once returned to school. It wasn’t a very balanced list, in your opinion.

“I’m fine,” you turned to face him, forcing a small smile.

As mentioned before, Draco could always tell how you were feeling. Which is why he pulled his hand from yours, turning over on his side to look at you. With furrowed eyebrows and concerned written across his features, you wanted nothing more than to peel your eyes away from him and completely ignore his gaze. But that was nearly impossible. It’s hard to look away from Draco Malfoy.

“Something tells me you’re lying,” he said softly, eyes scanning your face as if he could read your emotions written into your skin — as if the light freckles dotting your cheeks could give him the answers he was looking for.

You sucked in a deep breath, feeling the expansion of your lungs in your chest — it felt as if you were going to crush your heart any second now. Quite an unpleasant feeling, really.

“I’m not lying,” you said, voice cracking as you spoke. The worst possible lie. There was no way he’d believe that.

He scoffed lightly, “So you’re just going to ignore your feelings then, yeah?”

It was now your turn to sit up, leaning against one of your elbows as you turned your body to face him. His cheeks were tinted with a pale shade of pink, most likely from the burning sun. It was a rather warm afternoon for summer in England.

“What feelings?” you asked, averting your eyes, choosing to stare at an ant crawling slowly up a blade of grass. Not fascinating, but better than giving in to Draco.

“Y/N,” one of his hands reached over and touched your chin, lightly tilting it so you could turn your head up and face him, “I asked you to a picnic today so we could be alone, you know?”

You finally looked over to him, eyes scanning from the base of his throat, slowly up to meet his eyes, “Why?”

“Well, I thought I was being bloody obvious,” he grinned, “I like being alone with you.”

“But why?” you sounded like a child

His laugh was taunting you — effortless and relaxed. Completely juxtaposed to the raging storm of emotions going through your heart and head. How he could say something like that; so heavy and heartfelt, to acting like it was nothing, you could never understand.

“Because,” he scooted closer, his hand leaving your chin, but coming to rest atop of yours, “I don’t know how much clearer I can make this, but I like you.”

You looked over at him, eyes wide and mouth gaped open like a fish. You must look like a bloody idiot, but there was really no other way to respond to that. He liked you back. All this time, he liked you back. And you genuinely had no idea.

There were really no words you could say in response, so you decided on showing him how you felt instead, placing your hand at the back of his neck and bringing his lips to yours. They were incredibly warm — possibly from the sun — and soft. Softer than the grass beneath your skin, and sweeter than the chocolates melting in the basket by your feet. He tasted like mint and green apple, a mixture that felt odd when spoken, but tasted like heaven when experienced.

You felt him mumble against your lips, “I’ll take it you feel the same way?”

Pulling away to let out a small laugh, you nodded your head, “If it wasn’t obvious, yes.”

“Just making sure,” he gave you a lopsided grin, his hand cupping your cheek to connect his lips to yours once again.

— — —

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#draco malfoy #draco malfoy imagine #draco malfoy imagines #draco malfoy x reader #draco malfoy reader insert #draco malfoy one shot #draco malfoy one shots

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negandarylsatisfaction · 4 years

Text

[SUMMARY: Blade is a fearless woman out in the apocalypse on her own when she comes across Negan in the woods. Quickly feeling a connection with him, Negan learns Blade does not like to share him.]

Smut

Negan and Blade

It had been eight months into the apocalypse now, you had no shelter, little water and only squirrels left to eat. Being by yourself wasnt much of a strain for you as most of your life you spent alone before the apocalypse. Standing by a fire you made in the woods, you cooked a few squirrels you had caught earlier in the day sharpening your knives leaning against a tree. Suddenly hearing the sound of crunching leaves not to far from you, you instantly stopped what you were doing. Putting your hood over your head you slowly began to turn, your knife ready for aim when a man appeared through the trees.

"Shit," you whispered looking at the fire behind you. Not trusting anyone, you didnt want to cause any attention on yourself but it was too late.

"What do we have here?" A mans voice made you turn back quickly ready for defense.

"Dont come any closer." The man could barely see your face hiding behind your hood. Noticing the knife in your hand the man lifted up his hands with a lazy smile.

"Come on, sweetheart. Put that down before you hurt yourself."

"Oh arent you quite funny." The sarcasm in your tone he actually liked. Observing what you had around you the man frowned noticing squirrels being cooked behind you.

"Ho-ly shit. Squirrels? Really, sweetheart?"

Right away you could tell this man was one who liked to play games, arrogant and slick. A man who thought he had a alot of charm thinking he could distract you with his little pet names.

"Stop speaking. Where the hell did you come from?"

"More like where the hell did you come from, darling. As far as I'm concerned your on my side of the woods." The cockiness in his tone made you scowl, he didnt seem intimated by you at all.

"Says who?"

"Says me. Negan."

"Well, Negan. I dont give a shit who you say you are. This is free land now get out of my face before you get hurt."

"Well shit-" Negan observed you from head to toe raising his brows.

"You do look like a you can give a mean fight." He noticed your buckled up black boots, your black ripped jeans, black top and a leather jacket, just like him. Yet, he couldnt help himself. With a smirk he slowly put his hands down and started to walk towards you.

"Dont push me, I mean it." You warned him waving the knife in his face when he suddenly caught your wrist in his hand. Still, you moved too quickly for him. Negan didnt expect you to get loose so quickly and next thing he knew you now had the knife pointed sharply against his neck. Looking up, careful not to move he laughed in disbelief as you held your place.

"Well look at that, a little tougher than I thought after all." Still with a cocky tone yet a look of surprise in his eyes, Negan did not move.

"Listen, darling I've got a sanctuary not far from here." He looked around at your surroundings with the knife still pointed at his neck.

"You look like you could use some help-"

"I dont." You responded stubbornly, truth be told you definitely needed help. But, having always found a way out of your struggles you were sure youd find a way.

"Listen to me. I have a sanctuary, I can give you a place to stay. You can have real food, shit we can use a girl like you on our side. What do ya say?" You couldnt believe even with a knife to his throat this man still had the urge to smile down at you. His offer did not sound bad at all, after all it was getting cold and you were running low on food.

"Where is the place?" You asked as he responded by pointing in the direction he came from. After a moment of uncertainty you slowly pulled the knife away from his neck leaving a red mark. Negan cracked his neck with a sigh.

"And if I dont like it. I'm leaving."

"Whatever you want, woman." Negan stood back as you gathered your belongings and pulled your hood back. For the first time Negan got a glimpse of the woman whom he had just had a confrontation with. Long dark hair lay over your shoulder as he noticed the other side of your head shaved.

"Mmm." A sound of satisfaction escaping his lips making you look up.

"What?" You asked with an attitude that he couldnt help but want to see more of.

"Nothing, darling. Nothing at all."

"Well, are you going to lead to where the hell this place is?" Placing your hands on your hips you asked with very little patience.

"This fucking woman." Negan muttered under his breath with a chuckle before leading the walk before you. Usually you would've never trusted a strange man this way but desperate times called for desperate measures. Plus, you knew how to defend yourself, you had faced worse before.

After a bit Negan and you walked side by side, his eyes helplessly drifting to you here and there. Your style attracting him, your fearlessness intriguing him, Negan wanted to know more.

"Do you have a name?"

"Of course I do." You responded sarcastically.

"Well are you going to tell me it, darling? Or are you going to make me fight for that too? I mean unless its cause you like the nicknames I've given you-"

"My name is Blade." Your interruption quickly silencing him.

"Blade..." he repeated as he looked you up and down.

"It sure fits."

Negan led you into what he called the Sanctuary. A heavily guarded space with many others, you had no idea how close you were to so much life all along. Right away you noticed each person having a job at the Sanctuary as everyone looked busy working on something. It was clear they didnt stay here for free. Introducing you to who he called his 'right hand man' Simon, Negan showed you around. In a room you entered, sat a few ladies clearly dressed differently from everyone else.

"These here are my lovely wives."

"Wives?" You looked at him strangely before looking back at the women. They were dressed in tight short black dresses, all wearing heels, you wondered where they found any of this. Raising a brow at him you crossed your arms wondering what he had in mind.

"If you thought I came back with you here to play a role of one of your wives, your sadly mistaken." Your loud voice making the women turn to you wondering who you were. Negan right away blocked their view of you, standing before you as he leaned one hand on the wall behind you.

"Easy, sweetheart. It wasnt a thought but since you mentioned it-" he bit down on his bottom lip.

"You would look damn good in a tight little dress."

"You wish," your tone just as arrogant as his and he liked it.

"Just a little bit." He whispered before you moved out of the small space he cornered you in and left the room.

"Just show me where I'm staying." Walking off Negan followed you closing the door behind him. Showing you the room you would stay in, it was nice to see a bed. You couldnt remember the last time you slept in a bed, it had been months. Negan noticed the way you looked at it and wondered how hard you must've had it all alone. He wondered how long you were all alone.

"This good enough?"

"Its great," your attitude quickly changing back to a nonchalant manner.

"Tell me, Blade-" Negan took a step in front of you wanting to be face to face.

"How long you been on your own?"

His question making you throw your head back with a chuckle, it had been so long since you last saw your family.

"Since I was seventeen," Negan frowned with your response a bit confused.

"Oh I been on my own long before this apocalyptic world ever took over. This is nothing new for me having to fend for myself, Negan. That's why I said if I have to leave I will, nothing I haven't handled before."

Negan squinted his eyes as you spoke, he could tell you've had it rough.

"Well let's hope you dont have to....I think it'd be nice having you around."

Was that a genuine compliment that didnt involve your looks or any sarcastic remark? He could tell you almost cracked a smile.

"Well, I'll let you get settled in. Theres food in the next room, make yourself comfortable." Negan began to walk out before you quickly turned towards him and called out for him.

"Hey Negan?"

"Mhm?" He turned to you leaning on the door way.

"Thanks," without saying a word he winked at you and left the room.

The next few days you began helping out the men by securing the fences surrounding the sanctuary. No one had put you up to this job but you knew you could do it.

"Well well well, I dont remember assigning you to this." Negan showed up behind you watching you twist the wires securely.

"I'm good with my hands, didnt think you'd mind."

"Good with your hands huh?"

Rolling your eyes you turned to him making him laugh.

"I'm sorry, some times I cant help myself."

"Well learn how to, or save that energy for all those wives."

Negan raised his brows at your quick come backs. A man who always enjoyed giving sarcasm yet rarely was ever on the other end.

"God you're fun to tease," you couldnt help but laugh along with him. You knew he purposely picked at you just to hear you come back at him. He enjoyed the feistiness you gave him, he enjoyed you not giving a shit to what he might think.

Just as you finished you went back inside to grab something to eat and Negan followed. He watched as you prepared yourself a sandwich, reaching across the table making your shirt go up he noticed a tattoo on your hip.

"What's that you got there?" Standing back straight you looked down to where his eyes were and pulled your shirt down.

"A tattoo. What never heard of one?" You responded defensively making him smirk.

"I got a few myself. Rarely come across women with them, especially in such a....sensitive spot." His voice was low as he came to realization that maybe you enjoyed a little bit of pain.

"Can I see it?"

Hesitantly you pressed your lips together before slightly lifting up your shirt and revealing a tattoo of a rose wrapped in barb wire.

"Mmmm.." he leaned in looking at it closely.

"Mean anything?"

"My middle name is Rose," you explained as he his eyes squinted.

"I take it the barb wire means pain," he continued looking up into your eyes.

"You can say that," you responded softly.

"How old are you, Blade?"

"31," you sat down across from him and began to eat.

"So you've been on your own since 17, shit wheres your family?"

"Hopefully dead," your response was blunt before you took another bite.

"Surrounded by assholes huh?"

"Real big assholes. They didn't care for me so I dont care for them, I've been better off alone anyways."

"I cant argue with that," Negans eyes wandered over your features.

"Done a pretty good job with yourself."

Not really knowing how to take a compliment without some form of back handed comment you looked away.

"Yeah well you gotta do what you gotta do," you responded confidently.

"What are you doing here anyways? Wont your wives wonder where you are?"

Negan chuckled at the mention of them, he could tell you were enjoying his company and didnt want him to leave.

"I wont go anywhere if you dont want me to, darling." His unexpected response making your cheeks turn red.

"I never said-"

"Do you really think you can lie to me?" He leaned in close staring directly into your eyes across the table.

"Why the hell do you want to stay anyways?"

"Maybe I like spending time with you too."

What the hell was this man doing? It was hard to deny that you did indeed like spending time with him but, this was the last thing you needed. The man had multiple wives, an arrogant way of thinking but God he was so sexy.. His style attracted you to him, his voice, his eyes whenever he spoke to you.

"What are you thinking about?" Negan bit his bottom lip with a smile, he could see right through you.

"Nothing. I'm exhausted and I'm full and want to go to bed soon."

"Oh yeah? Is that what's going through your head right now?"

"Yes. That's it." You stood up picking up your plate and taking it to the sink. Negan stood up with you eagerly following you by the counter.

"You sure that's what you're thinking about?" He asked again with a grin leaning his face close to yours.

"I think you're thinking about something that involves me....and you just cant admit it." His voice was a deep whisper, the way he spoke sent a tingle to the pit of your stomach.

"No the hell I am not. What the hell makes you think that?" You walked past him rushing into your bedroom as he quickly followed behind.

"Look at you, you could barely stay still. You're fidgeting, getting all nervous. Am I making you nervous, baby?" He teased.

"Dont call me baby," you turned to him with frustration.

"Fine," he stepped close to you and spoke very slowly.

"Then look me in the eyes and tell me you're not thinking about what I could do to you." Your lips parted as you smelled his scent so close to you. You couldnt speak, you couldnt move and Negan knew he had complete control. Looking down at your lips he slowly caressed your face and leaned in for a soft kiss. Not fighting it you felt his lips sensually move against yours, his tongue slipping through the crack of your lips to tease yours. Moaning against him, Negan didnt separate his lips from you as he reached behind him and shut the door. Taking off his jacket and quickly unbuttoning his pants Negan threw you back on the bed. Continuing to kiss you down to your neck, you felt his tongue make swirls on your skin making you squeeze him.

Negan pulled off your clothing and aggresivly turned you around. The tattoo of the barb wire rose continuing from your side to your lower back made Negan lick his lips in satisfaction.

"Get up," he spoke hoarsely as you got on your knees and positioned yourself in front of him. Feeling his large hand on your lower back you felt him easily slide in you. Negan wasted no time in grabbing your hips and making you slam back against him. Moaning you grabbed the covers tightly, it had been so long since you felt this pleasure. Negan could tell by the way you cried out when he first entered you. The sound of longing to be touched, the sound of your needs finally being met.

"Give it to me harder," you spoke seductively only arousing him more. Negan grabbed you by your hair pulling you back up against him. His hand grabbing your throat as he pressed his lips to the side of your face and kept thrusting. Groaning, he gave your throat a tighter squeeze. Gasping for air, you could hear him breathing erratically against your ear.

"Oh Blade," you rolled your eyes back at the sound of his voice, he couldn't hold himself any longer. Negan pushed you back down before he quickly pulled out and released himself all over your back.

"Fuck.." he moaned as he stepped back out of breath. Cleaning yourself up as he got dressed, you stood up and walked towards him

"You should stay here tonight," your suggestion making him look up at you with half a smile.

"Oh darling I would. I've got some business I need to take care of but-" he stood up and ran his hands up your thighs and hips.

"I promise I'll come by as soon as I'm done." Negan grabbed your face and kissed you passionately. What the hell was going on with you? Why was this man getting a hold on you so quickly? Without saying anything more Negan left your room leaving you to think over what just happened. Leaving you to think over the way he looked at you, the things he said to you. He actually admitted to liking to spend time with you, the thought made you blush to yourself. You couldnt wait for him to return, it being so late at night you wondered what business he had to take care of. A little while later you stepped out of the room with a smile still on your face when you looked up and suddenly felt a crushing feeling in your chest. Negan was coming out of a room with two of his wives laughing. Of course you knew he had wives but after having touched him and slept with him, the thought of another woman with him made you burn with anger.

"Some business you got going huh?" The smile immediately left Negans face as he looked up at you before him.

"Blade, darling-"

"Dont 'Blade darling' me, what the hell I was thinking?" Angrily you walked off back to your room leaving the two women confused as Negan sighed. Following you to your room he entered right behind you slamming the door shut behind him.

"What the hell is your problem with me?"

"What is my problem? Taking care of business huh? Business with those girls?"

Negan frowned with a puzzled expression.

"Pardon my french, sweetheart but wait a fucking minute, are you jealous?"

"No! I'm not jealous," you denied the truth as you turned your back to him.

"I just dont like sharing what's mine."

Negan raised his brows surprised with your response.

"So I'm yours now huh?"

You scoffed at him turning to walk passed him before he blocked your way.

"Hang on now, Blade. I actually kinda like the sound of that. So does that make you mine now too?"

"No, why would I want to be yours when you have all those women, "you spoke in disgust before raising your brow as if you has just come up with an idea.

"Well since you get to have your fair share, then I should too. Simon looks-"

"Oh I'd be very careful where you're going with that, sweetheart." His expression turning very serious as he stepped closer to you.

"Why cant I have my own fun, it's not like I'm one of your wives who have to abide by your selfish rules while you do as you please." None of the women Negan had met had the nerve to argue his way of being.

"I dont want you to be one of them," he shot back.

"Good, cause I didnt want to anyways."

"You know what the fuck I want?" Negans voice rose as he took a step closer to you.

"I just want you to be mine and shit, I'll be yours the way you want me to." Negans words catching you completely off guard, so unexpected it left you speechless. There was something Negan couldnt explain that pulled him to you in a way he had never felt with any of the other women. Negan may not have been a one woman man most of his life but when someone caught his eye, it was hard for him to look past it.

"You dont even know me," you muttered.

"Shit, you dont even know me all that well but I know you have the same damn feeling I have." The two of you looked at each other in silence, you couldnt deny the connection you felt with him.

"You dont want the wives? Hell, they dont have to be there but-" he unexpectedly pulled you close to him aggresivly.

"I expect there to be no one else on your side either."

"I'm not looking for anyone else," your response was quick and spoken with confidence.

"Good," a smile slowly spread across his lips as you felt his hand slide down your back and grab your ass.

"You're lucky I like you," you squinted your eyes up at him making him laugh.

"Shit, well I am honored, doll."

"Dont patronize me," you scowled at him.

"Not at all, Blade, not at all."

Negan leaned in and took your lips with his feeling content with the thought of you being the only woman for him.

#jeffrey dean morgan #the walking dead negan #negan twd #negan fanfic #negan fan fiction #negan x you #negan x oc #negan smut #negan imagines #the walking dead fanfiction #the walking dead fic #twd

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thebigqueer · 3 years

Note

ik i already gave you a prompt, but just had this idea i really like. so Person A has psychic powers(or gets a vision or whatever). they see/know that things will never work out with Person B, but they let themselves be selfish and indulge in the relationship. things dont end well :/

ahhh hi chaotic ily!! sorry about the super late response, i’ve just been playing around with my own one-shots and haven’t had the time to focus on my fic prompts.

thank you so much for the fic prompt, and i hope you like this! and, as always: i do little to no editing on these fic prompts, so please don’t be too judgmental as you’re reading them seeing as they will not be my best work.

also i changed up the prompt just a little bit, i hope you don’t mind! it just kind of fit better with what i was thinking.

Silena sighs as she gazes up at the sky, letting the air caress her face as thoughts swirl in her head. She knows she should be happy about this - about having a boyfriend, about being in love, about Charles.

But something is eating at her heart. This doesn’t feel right; it doesn’t feel... normal. This entire relationship... it’s artificial, at least to Silena.

She would usually excuse this discomfort simply for anxiety of being in a new relationship. More than once has she gotten nervous during the beginning days of having a partner. It’s a new adjustment to have to bring someone new into your life and admit to them secrets you wouldn’t always tell your friends or family.

But this time... it feels worse. It doesn’t feel right.

She wants to say it’s because she’s nervous. But if the dreams are any indication - and, since she’s a demigod, she’s sure it is - maybe she’s not entirely happy about being with Charlie.

Almost every night for the past few days, she’s been hearing a voice in her head. Something familiar, something enchanting. She’s always in a black room, alone and afraid at the beginning, but as soon as the voice speaks, she’s immediately lulled into some kind of daze. “You do not want this,” the voice usually says to her. “My child, you know what you want. And it is not this.”

Silena never understands what it means. “What are you talking about?” she usually asks.

“It is not Charles you love,” the voice replies. “It is not him. Listen to your heart.”

She always begs the voice to stay, to tell her more, but it never does. She wakes up in a cold sweat, still shrouded in darkness, and only confusion rocks he rmind.

She assumes that the voice is of her mother’s. But what could Aphrodite want with her? What is she trying to tell Silena?

The daughter of Aphrodite sighs as another brush of wind touches her skin. Being here on the beach usually lets her clear her thoughts, but at the moment she’s too alone with them.

No, she thinks. I like Charlie, don’t I? Why am I so nervous about this?

And she does like Charlie. They’ve been looking out for each other for years now, always catching each other’s eyes. But thinking about being in a relationship with him... Why does it not feel right? Does she really feel anything romantic for him? Or was it a general aesthetic attraction?

She groans and closes her eyes, trying to block out the sun. There are too many thoughts in her brain, too much confusion in her chest. Why do emotions have to be so hard?

A crunching sound echoes beside her and she sits up quickly, surprised by the interruption of silence. Ahead of her is Clarisse, her tall, muscled form glinting in the sunlight. She smiles at Silena warmly in greeting and for a fleeting moment, the daughter of Aphrodite’s heart soars. As strange as it is, she finds a lot of confidence in being one of the only people that Clarisse has been nice to. She feels proud to be Clarisse’s friend at all.

“Hey,” the daughter of Ares says, settling beside Silena. “Couldn’t find you at breakfast. Thought you’d be here. Everything good?”

Silena shrugs and pulls her knees to her chest, staring out into the distance. “I guess. I’ve just been... thinking.”

“That doesn’t sound good,” notes Clarisse. “What are you thinking about? Is it those dreams again?”

Silena sighs and nods. “Yeah. It’s just... so haunting. It’s like something is telling me that I’m wrong, and something feels wrong, but I’m not entirely sure what it is, you know?”

“Is it about your relationship with Charles?”

“Yeah.”

Clarisse falls silent for a moment, letting the wind whisper between them. Then she says, “Silena, have you considered that maybe you aren’t happy?”

“Yeah, I guess I kind of have.” Silena grimaces. “But it’s just like... We just started dating. Maybe I’m just not used to him as a person yet. You know?”

A doubtful look flashes across Clarisse’s features, her eyebrows creasing in concern. “Are you sure about that? Because usually people date others when they’re comfortable to be with them.” She brushes her fingers through the ground, her eyes wandering around as she thinks. “Maybe... No offense, Silena, but if you’ve been getting these dreams, then maybe he’s not the one. Maybe you aren’t ready for this.”

Maybe it’s just Silena’s hearing, or maybe it’s just her hopefulness, but there’s something sharp and painful in Clarisse’s voice. Something desperate. It’s like she’s trying to get Silena to understand something important, but she can just barely hear Clarisse.

Silena sighs and leans her head against Clarisse’s shoulder. Amid all the confusion, she just wants a warm place to lean to, a comforting spot against one of her bestest friends. “Yeah. Maybe. But I don’t know... maybe I’ll just try it for the meanwhile. See where it goes.”

Clarisse falls silent again, something tense pressing against her features. Her muscles twitch underneath Silena’s head, agitated from the energy between them. Silena wonders what’s got her so worked up, but then again, this is Clarisse. Something is always working her up.

“Hey, I gotta go,” she says abruptly. Her voice grates against Silena’s ears, cuts right through her skin. “I have some, uh, business to do. See you later?”

Silena frowns and lifts her head from Clarisse’s shoulder. Something tugs at her heart at her words, but she’s not sure why she’s feeling so emotional all of a sudden. “Really? But I feel like we haven’t talked that much today.”

Clarisse shrugs and pushes herself up, regret etched onto her features. “Just a busy day. Gotta prepare for the battle. See you at lunch?”

Silena pretends not to notice the disappointment that presses against her heart. She nods and looks out again, starting to lose herself into her isolation again. “See you later.”

Clarisse hesitates for a moment. Then a crunching sound echoes, and soon the daughter of Ares is gone, leaving Silena to wallow in her own pity.

She watches Clarisse leave, her heart weighing down by some kind of pressure, some kind of emotion. She wants to run to her and help her out, to stick by her side, to do something with her today. She wants to be around Clarisse.

Then, as she turns back around to face forward, it hits her. She doesn’t like Charles.

She’s in love with Clarisse.

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aciid-eater · 4 years

Note

hi!! I saw you were writing for atla, so could i request a sokka x reader where the reader gets kinda close to haru and sokka's jealous? ty!

“The universe” Sokka x reader

Warning: none

_______________________________

“Maybe the universe thinks youre as beautiful as I do..."

"Well then Sokka, you must be as blind as the universe."

That was it. Those were the few worlds that it took to make Sokka fall blindly in love with y/n. Wether it be the atmosphere of that warm night, or the way the moonlight dusted her cheeks with blue hue, he was in love. Truly in love.

That was that realization that changed everthing for him. When his short glances morphed into longing stares. When the need to be held bubbled so high in him that he wrapped arms around himself to stay contained. To say the least, he was miserably content. He loved the little smirks and smiles she gave him, the gracious laughs every once and a while, but he wanted more.

It made his breath hitch everytime he would find you and Haru training in some part of the air temple. His heart hurt everytime you laughed at the Earth Nation boy just as you did to him. But what was he supposed to do? Tell her to stop hanging out with the guy, that would be so uncool. So he just chilled, clinging desperately to what he had left of her attention.

Sokka jumped slightly as y/n plopped down on her back next to him. He looked over, her skin was slick with sweat and her breath was labored, having just come back from tossing bolders around with Haru. Instead of looking away, Sokka just watched, his eyes glazed over the dips and curves in her face and how the light from the fire accentuated them.

“Dont pass out on me now." Haru chuckled, earthbending a pebbled at her face.

"You wish. Im just... resting my eyes." Y/n didn't open her eyes, letting the smile that spread across her face convey her contentment.

"Yeah right, you can go ahead and say I wore you out." Haru teased, equally as tired.

Jealousy bubbled in Sokka's throat, threatning to spill out infront of everyone.

"Im training you! Dont get cocky." Y/n laughed.

Sokka huffed quietly, turning away from the two as they joked. Then finally he stood, walking away.

"Where are you going, Sokka?" Katara asked, calling out to the water tribe boy.

"Out." he said bitterly. Y/n opened her eyes and watched his back as he left. Then she locked eyes with Katara.

"I've got him." Y/n stated, getting up and following his path.

The forest was cold as the brances of trees reached out to brush y/n's shoulders. Leaves and twigs crunches in protest as she stepped over them, and june bugs rattled as she walked by. Normally she would be weary of where she was going, but she had walked this forest so many times with Sokka that the path was clearly embeded in her mind. She smiled softly when Sokka's back came into view. Then she leaned against a tree on the edge of the clearing, on the other side was Sokka, sitting with his legs over the cliff.

"Why'd you leave me with those lame-os?" Y/n chuckled. She noticed how his shoulders tensed, the relaxed again, he didn't turn to look at her.

"Oh come on, you’re not talking to me now?" She asked jokingly, draping her arms over his back. He shrugged her off with a sniffle. Y/n stood back with a confused expression. Her eyes were glued to his side profile, how he tried his best to look anywhere but her.

Y/n sighed sat down next to the boy, throwing her legs over the clif next to his. She leaned her head over onto his shoulder, watching the stars.

"You like Haru, dont you?" He asked quietly, breaking the silence.

"Huh? Is that what you’re all bent out of shape about?" She asked.

"What? No! I- I just-"

"You just like me?" Y/n asked, raising an eyebrow with a large grin.

"No! Y/n I dont-Stop looking at me like that!" He huffed.

"Why should I? The universe thinks you’re just as beautiful as I do." Sokka's face flushed at her careless comment. He didn't moved as her soft hand came up to cup his cheek, and his eyes slipped shut when her lips connected with his own. The world was still when he drank her in, still when his arms wrapped around her waist.

"Besides, its good that you like me, it means my feelings aren't one sided.”

#sokka x reader #atla #avatar the last airbender #Sokka #Zuko #Katara #atla x reader #atla fanfic

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nota-deviant · 3 years

Text

Chapter 3

Dib was surprised to not see Zim come in. It had been a routine for him at this point and now he had a pre-made cup of whiskey going to waste

"Dammit Zim, of course you wouldn't come in the day I make your drink for you"

The raven haired male grumbled to no one but himself, washing a glass and perking up at a conversation he heard at one of the close by tables

"I can't believe he's allowed to come in here"

"You think someone would shoot him already"

Dib glared. He had no idea who the men were talking about but he didn't enjoy hearing things like that in his bar. It would usually start a fight and he would end up with atleast a bloody nose or a black eye from a drunk patron

"Hey!"

He spoke up, the two guys looking over to him with curious looks

"I don't appreciate that kind of talk in my bar. If you’re planning on killing someone, I'd rather not have the blood on my floors"

He stated in a sour tone, making it clear that they better stop or he was going to kick them out

"Of course someone like you wouldn't want that talk. Man up, a little blood won't kill ya"

"What kind of someone am I exactly?"

The two looked at each other before bursting into a brief fit of laughter

"Oh you crack me up. But of course you'd be clueless, your kind aren't very smart"

Dib wasn't having it. This conversation was about to go one of two ways. Either they leave...or things were bound to get messy

"Get out of my bar."

He stated sternly, but the men stayed put

"Or what fag?"

Dibs blood started to boil

"Look at him! You people are low but I'd never think you'd mingle with the freak that comes in everyday. Then again, you both have a thing in common"

"Yeah, we're not douches."

"Your menaces to society. Man up and quit acting like a fool around that freak"

"That freak is the only goddam person in here that pays their fucking tab"

With that, Dib grabbed the whiskey he had poured for Zim and tossed it onto the man, brown liquid staining the light blue plaid shirt he wore

Before he knew it the bar had gone into chaos. It wasn't just a small bruise or nose bleed this time for Dib...oh no..this time Dib was wrestling on the ground with the same guy, a bottle flying over them and smashing against the wall as Dib was punched smack dab in the middle of his face. Was his mouth bleeding?

Dib couldn't tell. He never fought, and because of that he was quite easily beaten down in the brawl. Blood pooled around his head and he groaned, his left eye almost swollen shut from how bruised it was.he couldn't tell whether or not the red he saw was alcohol or blood, settling on closing his eyes and passing out

Dib woke up later that night to an empty bar, his head in excruciating pain and pieces of glass sticking out of his torso and arms. He was just glad he wasn't shot. Dib shakily pushed himself up and groaned as the pain only became worse now that he was standing. His bar looked like it had been turned upside down and he was adamant that his father was going to have quite a few words to say to him about this

I can't believe you lost control of yourself so easily

He could already hear the words in his head as he made his way to the back to clean his wounds. He was so focused on the pain and blood that he didn't hear the door open or the crunch of glass under heavy shoes as someone made their way to the bar

"How am I going to fix this?"

He scolded himself and frowned, bandaging up his arm and jumping back as a hand was placed on his shoulder. He turned around quick enough to see the shocked and angry look in Zims eyes. They were glowing in this light..almost completely red from what Dib could see. In his mind he panicked...adrenaline pumping through his veins again as he booked it for the back of the bar. He didn't know why he ran..was it because he was scared? Was he afraid that Zim was going to hurt him too now? Dib doubted it but he wouldn't put it past him, a lot of bruises were ones from the day before when Zim stayed until closing and wouldn't stop punching his arm every time he said a stupid joke. Dib got lost in his thoughts and nearly ran right into a wall, turning around and immediately being pinned by..what were they? They shone like metal and were sharp enough to stab straight through him but only went through his shirt and dug into the wall

"Who did this?"

"What?"

Dib looked up, seeing Zim now at a taller point and standing on two of the weird metal legs

"Who.Did.This"

His voice had danger in it and he looked like he was ready to murder someone. Dib couldn't get any words out..he didn't know who..and he didn't want anyone getting hurt. Warm tears flowed down his face and Zims face softened from anger to pity as he lowered himself and walked over. Zim had never touched Dib before...atleast not in the way he was doing so now. A clawed hand wiped one of Dibs tears away and he sniffles, trying to not look as stupid as he felt in that very moment

"I'm sorry, I couldn't stop it! I didn't know how to fight him off I just-"

"Be quiet..you'll only cause yourself more harm by panicking"

Zim shushed Dib and pulled him into a hug, those same claws digging into his back as Zims face went into the crook of his neck.

They stayed like that for a good long while, quiet and both filled with fear

"I don't know who it was"

Dib finally said, Zim pulling away from the hug and giving a nod. The green man's hands lingered on his shoulders for awhile before being pulled back to his sides

"I didn't mean to scare you..I can explain everything"

"Dont..not right now atleast..I've had enough excitement for one day"

Dib took Zims hand and gave a weary smile

"Why don't we have a drink...it seems like we both need one right now"

Zim let out a weak laugh and nodded, his eyes seeming to go into a softer pink glow rather than red

"Lets"

Chapter 2 here

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summii · 3 years

Text

looking back

pairing: everyone/reader. eren/reader

warnings: MANGA SPOILERS. MAJOR MAJOR MANGA SPOILERS. CHAPTER 139 , DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE NOT READ THE MANGA/ DONT WANT SPOILERS. Death mention, Sadness- VERY SAD. Alcohol consumption, Nightmares, brief description but not really. Season three spoilers.

A/N: yeah, i totally didn’t cry while writing this 😫 sunny told me it would be sad ofc- but did i listen? no 🥰

_________________

the trip was long. the journey itself to get there was exhausting, the emotional side of it was taking a toll on you. you didn’t know if you would even want to come in the first place, but then again, it was what everyone had wanted. they wanted to see him. well...at least, in a sense...in the only way they could.

the trek to the hill was silent, as if there were a tension hanging above everyone’s heads. the thoughts of everyone- everything you all had lost in the past years. it had been three long years since you had been on your home land. three years since you had talked to him. three years since he had died.

staring at the state of the stone slab at the foot of the tree was a feat that brought the memories back to the forefront of your mind as if they were lightening. all of those moments spent in the rain, heat, cold, all of it. even the ones you distinctively remember where you didn’t know if you both would make it back then- if you’d see him again.

it was an unbreakable silence- nobody wanted to bring anything up first. not even as you all gathered around and sat in front of his grave, gazing down at the words engraved in the stone slab.

it seemed like a long time since you had gotten there that someone had finally broke the silence, “jean...why does your hair look like that?” armin managed to murmur out after breaking his gaze from the stone.

it was all the group needed to loosen up, many of them letting out chuckles and soon enough you were smiling along with them.

“yeah....eren would have made fun of you for it for sure,” you piped up, finally reaching over to open the wine you had brought. jean made a face in response and snatched the bottle from your hands, causing you to huff in annoyance.

“oh yeah- sure- bag on the guy who tried to look his damn nicest. whatever- that bastard can eat his words if he even tried to comment on my hair,” jean ranted as he uncorked the wine, soon slamming the bottle onto the ground after taking a drink from it straight.

“you horse- use the cups we brought,” annie cut in suddenly, thrusting one forwards with an annoyed glare. jean merely rolled his eyes and took the cup from her, pouring a hefty amount into his cup almost instantly. “yeah yeah- shut it,” he grunted out.

everyone took turns pouring the wine into their cups, taking sips. soon enough the silence turned into a bustling conversation, joking around light heartedly; they were light conversations.

“you know- remember when eren’s odm gear totally went awal and caused him to slam his head into the ground?” reiner cut into the conversation, finally bringing up the man who’s grave the group had come to visit. instead of pausing in a depressive silence like before, everyone let laughs tumble out of their mouths, your own expression lighting up into a bright smile.

“yeah! i remember mikasa and armin had to patch him up so many times!” you cried out through your laughter, bringing your cup up to your lips. you caught the eye of the female from across the circle, her soft smile only making your own grow.

it was like a fever-dream. the nights you would spend with him, the days spent alongside him fighting, talking, joking...it almost felt like he was still there with everyone, getting overly embarrassed by their taunts and laughter- he would definitely become red in the face and shout out insults or threats to them all. either that, or he’d try to embarrass you all as well. you could picture him sitting next to armin, joining in on the drunk banter and festivities. you could picture him here, with everyone. with you.

“you know…you’ll get wrinkles at a young age if you keep scowling…”

the boy stared up at you from where you were on his hip bones, having just pinned him down. light sparring- well, at least that’s what it was supposed to be. until your sparring partner got frustrated.

you didn’t know him- vaguely remembered his name, and vaguely of who he surrounded himself with. but besides that, all you really knew of him was his drive to kill titans.

“shut up! you’re so annoying!”

he sprung up suddenly and his head smashed into your own, causing you to reel back with a heavy screech, quick to shove your hand into his face to move him back.

“you crazy ass suicidal bastard!” was your response, and soon the two of you were rolling around in a feat of what seemed to be a power struggle wrestling match. it continued on until you two were pulled away soon after.

but even as the group went on about their memories with him, he wasn’t. all you could do was remember the times he was there with everyone, smiling alongside them. you joined in to distract yourself from thinking too much about it.

“or the time he tried to compete with sasha in a shooting range and lost,”

“let’s not forget the time he talked about captain levi’s height and captain levi was standing behind him!”

“or when annie flipped him”

“didn’t he flip you because of that, jean?”

“n-no! shut up! we’re not talking about me!”

“you know- i remember him being so worried about your mom- he thought she was being treated so badly!”

“...eren always did regret never telling his mom he loved her....” mikasa suddenly cut in to the conversation.

the group went on reminiscing for a long while, laughter being shared between everyone. your stomach almost hurt from thinking back to the many times eren had embarrassed himself. of course, there were light hearted memories, the funny ones seemed to outshine them in the conversation just in the slightest. though, even with the happiness seeming to run through you all, it wasn’t long before the group had become silent once more, staring longingly down at their cups or to the side.

it was another night of no sleep for you, it seemed. it was annoying- how many times you woke up in a cold sweat due to nightmares that just wouldn’t go away. it was different tonight though. for some reason…you just felt so…powerless. and claustrophobic.

it wasn’t much of a waiting game for you like this, listening to the noises in the tents to the others moving around in their makeshift beds. eventually you had to get up- clear your head. you couldn’t take it anymore. it was like a suffocating whirlwind of thoughts, you hadn’t realized you had been dozing out throughout getting your shoes on. before you knew it, there were leaves crunching underneath your feet from along the path.

the forest was so eerie at night, the sun shining down on everything and the path seemed to dark in some paths. even so, you just wanted some time away from the stuffiness. even if it would end up with you lost- though you doubted that would happen.

it seemed to be a long ten minutes before you decided you’d finally sit near the trunk of one of the trees. you brought your knees up under your chin, soon averting your eyes towards the sky. it was calm, for once.

that is, until you heard the same crunching to your right.

you sat up quickly, your pointed gaze hurriedly looking over, suddenly guarded, “hello? who’s there?!” you called out.

the crunching stopped, and soon your eyes adjusted to the brief light. of course you’d recognize those eyes anywhere. the passion in them was recognizable anywhere.

“…fancy seeing you out here…” your voice was soft, yet it didn’t fail to have that sarcastic tone that was so easy to use with him. eren merely scoffed.

“yeah, yeah. i heard you leave so i came lookin’ for you. i didn’t want you getting lost,” he huffed out, soon moving to take a seat next to you.

“aww, was brave wittle jaeger worried about me?~” you teased.

he was glad for the pale moonlight being the only source of light on you both, for it was easy for you to miss the way his face lit up into a light red. the annoyed grunt that left him left you both in a silence, and soon you were moving your gaze back up towards the sky. it was nice. you always felt most comfortable alongside him.

“…did you have a nightmare?” his voice cut out suddenly, almost enough to make you jump. however, the soft tamber of it relaxed you, and soon you were turning your gaze back; only to be surprised when your eyes met his immediately. he had already been staring at you- yet you couldn’t guess for how long.

“it’s so weird how you can guess things about me in a second with just one look. are you telepathic or something?”

“don’t avoid the question, (y/n).”

a hefty sigh left you, and soon you were turning away from him. you were afraid to see his expression-but you knew he wouldn’t leave it without getting an answer.

“…i just- yeah. i guess you could say that. i just- it’s just…do you think we’ll be alright after this? how much it will…how hard it’ll be to retake shinganshina? it must be so hard on you and mikasa and armin- i can’t even begin to fathom the pain…i wanna help in some way- b-but i just feel..powerless? like…reiner and bertholdt’s - hell, even annie- all three of them betraying us…i don’t know…affected all of us…and yet you’re still so…strong” you huffed, picking at the grass near your feet as you avoided his gaze. you missed the way his gaze softened- one of the many things you were oblivious to.

“honestly,” he started with a grunt, bringing his hand up to your own and tugging it over to his lap. it almost made you fall to the side. “i think you might be overreacting,” he bluntly put out.

it had you blushing feverishly, and you were quick to stare up at him with surprise- but he cut you off before you could curse at him- “you just…worrying about me…reminds me that i’m not alone…which is enough…” he sighed.

your expression faltered, and you let out a helpless grunt before looking down once more. you didn’t say anything afterwards, and neither did he.

connie was the one to break the silence this time.

“i miss him,” he said, voice suddenly shaky as his eyes glossed over, his gaze moving up to meet that of the groups, yours included.

you hadn’t even realized tears of your own had swelled over your lash line and fell over on the apples of your cheeks. not until your eyes moved down to his grave, eren jaeger.

“he was...so bright and hopeful. i remember when- when he would go on rants in the mess hall about killing all of the titans...” you almost stuttered over yourself.

“I’ll kill them all, every last one of them!”

“yeah...he sounded so stupid,” jean chuckled, shaking his head and smiling against his wine cup.

“he would announce it to everyone...at the stupidest of times...not to mention his stupidly annoying undying passion,” connie huffed and downed the rest of his wine, trying to hide the tears that had filled his eyes.

“i wonder...what he would say about us crying over him if he saw us,” reiner sighed.

“he’d probably make fun of jean for crying, and connie for starting it,” you chimed in shakily.

“hey! you’re not too far off!”

everyone was crying, yet at the same time...you all were smiling.

“hey…when this is all over…do you think…we can live happily…together?” he asked one night.

your head moved up almost immediately, staring up at him from across the table, and soon your head was tilting to the side, “are we not happy right now?”

he almost looked conflicted for a moment- but soon enough that dull look was replaced after a small sigh, and soon he smiled at you. “you’re right. i’m completely unhappy with you,” he teased.

and when you turned your back to take the dishes away- his expression faded, dreading of what was to come. and how you would come to hate him.

once they had all gotten it out, armin stood suddenly, holding his cup over eren’s grave and beckoning everyone to follow. they poured their wine over the grave. it bled into the ground and soon disappeared, leaving a wet patch in the soil.

“we miss you...you suicidal maniac...”

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voidcat · 4 years

Text

– the sea and to see

characters: oikawa tooru/gn!reader

wc & genre: 1.6k - comfort :-)

a/n: another finals week where i write an oiks comfort<3 society if i didnt begin oikawa comfort fics everytime i felt down bc i have so many wips..

i dont rmr where i wanted this to go but i can’t find any other way to finish so ye,, also!! mentions of drinking, similar vibes to stardust on reader’s state of mind

One step, another and another.

Without looking around, you know where you are, wishing you didn’t. (but there’s nothing to be done about that now.)

Looking left and right, checking in case any familiar face is around, you sink to the ground, regret already filling your ears. A voice whispers and it’s right. This is a bad idea, one of your most stupid ones but then again, you’ve been making a bit too many of these lately.

It’s late but not too late. You weight the option to knock the door and decide against it. You need to get your thoughts straight and make up a plan, and hopefully convince yourself to get up and leave. But it never comes as your head between your hands, you doze off far far away and forget you’re ever there, lost somewhere in space.

You snap back with a shake, or a nudge on your shoulder. It feels different, a shadow over your vision, weather a bit colder now.

The shadow moves and you realize.

Note to self to never zone out again to avoid further falling asleep out in the open public. And as this passes by your eyes, he shuffles on his feet, possibly waiting for an explanation or at least a little bit of your attention on you. So you look up and he scrunches his nose in reply, the same stern look, cold eyes and disapproving face you see all too often.

A minute passes. Or maybe it’s a second or five, you’re not sure. You haven’t been good with time, not before and certainly not now. Letting out a breath, hands hanging from both sides you slowly begin to get up.

Once your mouth open, your words sound quieter than you’d like, and slower too. You must’ve slept for a while.

“Look, if you’re wondering why I’m sitting by your door, at god knows what o’clock, never mind it, just forge-“

“All I care about is you moving your ass right now.” He says (rudely interrupts your sentence) and you want to roll your eyes at him, so you do.

He only looks more annoyed now.

“You’re blocking the door.”

Oh, right…

The keys clink to one another, dance in the air for a while and do not struggle in the hole, get in and turn without a trouble, get out without a break. Even his door opens as smoothly as him.

This, only makes it worse.

“Yes, ‘oh’, so if you have nothing else to say, I’d like to rest.” Oikawa says as he steps in, and you cannot help but worry, again, even though it’s stupid and there’s no logical reason for you to get upset over his rudeness, because really… Isn’t this how the two of you go back and forth almost daily? Isn’t it given? The norm?

Except for some nights, comes that whisper again, and you want to argue back: ‘Weren’t you the one who told me this was a bad idea from the start?’

The jingling noise of the keys snap you out of your head again and you find Oikawa still standing at the edge of the door, waiting. For you to say something, you realize and you shake your head. Because this was a stupid idea from the very start.

But your brain disagrees; as Oikawa can tell from a single look at you that you’ve been doing it again, arguing with yourself and as you make a turn to leave, you feel your muscles move and speak: Can I come in?

But his body acts before you do and already makes way, not a comfortable enough space, for you.

This is, albeit, not the first time you’ve seen Oikawa in a different light but the moments are few and rare, it doesn’t take more than one hand to count them all.

The first time is in an awfully shitty, dim and almost orange-ish light. Maybe it’s yellow, you don’t recall well but the plaster on the walls make it seem like those pumpkins. It’s a mundane night, not one to stand out, the nearest liquor shop further away than the nearest bar and god, you really need that drink and it’s late at night.

And the first thing you have see upon stepping in, has to be a badly disguised Oikawa. Body language enough can tell he’s trying his very good to blend in, sitting in the far back but as always, he somehow radiates. The looks of many on his crunched shadowed figure, looking so strange to the man he often is in the day time.

And you make no noise as you enter. No bell on the door, no bartender to greet you as you get inside, everyone too busy dwelling in their self to even glance your way yet as if in script, like you’ve practiced this many times before, he looks up, his face unclear of emotion.

You sit by the bar and opt to ignore him.

The second time, doesn’t quite go like this. Not the third, the fourth and the nth…

Next thing you know, Oikawa Tooru provides to be an amazing drinking buddy.

He doesn’t participate in the drinking bit that often but he’s respectful of your resigned silence and you of his. There lays mutual respect for whatever it is you’re both in.

Those nights don’t start off bad so often but you never know, not really. But the endings start to get… calmer, neutral, you can feel yourself numbing to the feeling but your burden lightened.

It’s those nights that you forget how Oikawa is like in the day time, how the two of you are like. You decide, you like this Oikawa more, he feels different, his silence comes different. Even the way he still has everyone in the room’s atention on him, many at bay to be at his feet on a single command, mesmerized by his sole presence and still it’s not like how it is when the sun is up. The self stuck up behavior you’re so used to seeing is gone, no cocky smiles, no pride in his eyes, the glint is his eyes now empty.

It feels alien.

Yet you feel closer to this version of him, even if it doesn’t exist often.

Hearing the keys jiggling against one another, you’re back again. No doubt you dozed off, not even for just a minute this time.

More like time paused and a film going through your eyes as if you’re watching a show, seeing a flashback scene to clear things out.

Oh how you wish that’s how it was; easy.

But reality is cruel and things are barely clear. So you have to blindly swim in the dirty water or like a fish writhe in a poodle, desperate for some water.

Standing at the entrance, you wait.

He comes back soon after, clothes changed, a glass of water in his hand, head slightly titled and walks to the couch.

So you follow.

It doesn’t feel as foreign to be alone with him under proper lights, on a nice couch that smells nice. But considering how they are both places strangers to you, it’s no surprise.

Water left untouched, Oikawa’s gaze is on you but neither makes a move. Not a single car passes by, no sound can be heard from outside, it’s too quiet, compared to the places you’ve been at the same as him. It feels eerie.

Making your own noise sounds better in your head, so you focus on your breathing, on his, the tapping of your fingers against your leg, the shuffling of his shirt at his every move…

“Listen…” you take a breath. “I didn’t mean to, you know, barge in.” Breathe out. “I don’t… don’t even know how I got here frankly and-“

“You don’t have to apologize.” Jerk, you think, who said anything about an apology?

“I had to come here wth you once, I guess you weren’t as black out as I assumed that night.”

What you meant to say long forgotten, you find yourself on alert. “How come?”

“I drove you to your place?” It sounds more like a question, to check if you remember.

“Why would you do that?” your words, your voice sound foreign to you, a tone you haven’t heard in too long.

He just shrugs in a “why wouldn’t I?” way.

Your fingers intervened, eyes somewhere on the edge of the glass, you go back to the silence moments ago. It doesn’t feel as quiet now, as sound filled the air once, as your thoughts start to get loud in unspeakable manner, words in a language that never existed.

He seems as lost, not as deep in as you maybe, but still lost, just better at concealing with a smile.

“So what brings you here?”

You hear but do not grasp, it sounds too far away. Ears and throat filled, lungs numb and limbs cold, every sound is behind a veil, except for the beating of your hear echoing in your ears, in a last attempt, the pressure driving you mad.

“Hey.” He reaches again, this time placing a hand on your shoulder, barely touching but enough to pull you out. Just like feeling the sun on your skin for the first time in a long while, eyes sting and your skin itches, the wind feels too cold and a shiver goes down. But your body relaxes, lungs still intact, the pressure disappearing with each beat.

“Are you okay?”

Head shaking and arms around you, you don’t register. It always felt like this, it always feels like this, drowning and gasping for air, desperate to hold on to something but everything slips away and in a final attempt, limbs grow tired, your body exhausted.

“I didn’t want to be alone tonight.” You don’t hear yourself say.

The weight on the couch shifts. “Do you want some water?” you barely hear him say.

There’s no taste of salt to dry your insides, feeling refreshed for the first time in a while, you can open your eyes without a much trouble.

tags: @celosiiaa @ywanfen

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wreckofawriter · 5 years

Text

Never Forget

Pairing: Sirius Black x reader

Word Count: 3,406

Warnings: None? Swearing?

Request: hello~ thank you so much for responding to my request, its amazing and i dont mind at att that u responded a little later. so, if u dont mind too, could you pretty please do a sirius x reader when sirius escapes from Azkaban and when Remus come to see him brings y/n with him (they were fiances) and he wanted to hug her or somethin’ she looks werid at him and ask “ dude, i know you from somewhere? “ and sirius is shock that she forget him after all and y/n starts laughing and hugs him so tight and tells him how much he missed him and that she could never forget him. bassicaly a lot of fluff? thank you 🥺❤️

A/n: Sorry this took so long to come out! I hope you like it!

You had never considered yourself a vengeful person. In fact you found yourself quite the opposite. You had always been kind, kind to those who were kind to you and kind to those who weren’t. You had never insulted someone back or got someone in trouble on purpose, you had helped with some pranks, but nothing too harsh, you never, ever helped pull one on Snape, no matter how many names he called you or dirty tricks he pulled. You knew he was only doing because of your boyfriend anyway.

Yes you the sweetheart of hogwarts was dating the Sirius Black. You weren't quite sure how it happened, it was like you were suddenly submerged in a pool of minty breath, leather jackets and musky cologne. And you loved it. By age 14 you were madly in love with him, but unlike every other girl in hogwarts Sirius actually began to return your feelings. Not to say he admitted it right away, hell it took Sirius two years of denial and eleven months of fear before he finally asked you out. You had accepted, but not without hesitation, he had after all been rumored to have slept with half the school.

Surprisingly to everyone, even the gryffindor's best friends, Sirius had stayed completely and utterly loyal. He barely even looked at other girls, becoming oblivious to the flirtatious attempts they threw at him.

Sirius became the best boyfriend you could ask for. He did everything for you. He would buy you gifts that were far too expensive, showering you affection, help you with anything and everything, for the first time in his life he truly felt love and he wouldn't have given it away for anything, let alone risk it with his own mistakes.

It was no surprise to anyone when you moved in together after Hogwarts, your parents complained about it being too early but you managed to keep them docile. You also joined the Order of the Phoenix and was the maid of honor at James and Lily's wedding. You even received a ring of your own from a blushing nervous wreck of Sirius, a ring which you happily accepted.

Your seemingly perfect life was shattered only a month before your wedding.

You remembered the day clearer than you remembered most. You had been cooking, your y/h/c hair was put up in a disgusting excuse for a bun, the short blue skirt you were wearing paired with an oversized david bowie t-shirt that wasn't yours was covered by an already stained white apron that read ‘kiss the chef’ in red looping letters. The room had been full of steam, the scent of curry and cumin thick in your nose. You had a bad habit of eating dinner late at night, something developed because of the wacky schedule your job held. You had been waiting for Sirius to come back.

You jumped a bit at the sound of your door slamming open. Harsh footsteps echoed through the hall, your eyes widened slightly.

"Siri? Are you a-" your sentence dropped to the floor when he stumbled into your view. His hair was a tangled mess, his creamy skin broken in a harsh cut on his left cheek. His lips were parted slightly, he was breathing heavily. But the thing that struck you most were his eyes. The stormy grey was rimmed with red, irises tinted pink, a supernatural gloss making them shine unnaturally. The looked broken. They hold an impossibly heavy weight, like the world had suddenly crashed upon them.

"James is dead." He croaked, his voice raged and breaking.

You dropped the pan that you were holding, its contents scattering the ground. "W-what?"

"Lily too." Silver drops shimmered lightly down his face.

You felt tears sting your eyes, your vision blurring, "What about-" your voice fell short in a broken cry.

"He's alive, but I don't know what's going to happen." He sobbed rushing towards you and collapsing into your arms.

"We'll get him, right?" You spoke so softly and delicately, Sirius found the need to stop his breathing to keep you from shattering.

"Y/n, they were sold out." He clutched you desperately shaking.

"What?" Your brain simply couldn't process all this information.

"They think I did it. Everyone thinks I told him where they were." His voice was so raw with fear it was unrecognizable.

You just stood there stunned tears clinging to the inside of your eyelids as you felt your heart smash to pieces.

"They think I did it, but I didn't." He sobbed, "Peter did, I tried to fight him b-b-but now everyone thinks I killed him too, and he-he's alive and they are coming to get me." Tears began to wet your shoulder.

You were too stunned to speak. The feeling of absolute terror and rage swept you.

"They're gonna take me to Azkaban y/n/n." He looked up at you and your heart shattered. He was broken, utterly and bitterly broken.

You felt your already shattered heart clench in protest, begging you to look away from this train wreck of a man before it was hurt anymore. You let out a choked sigh. Before grabbing Sirius neck and slamming your lips roughly on to yours.

His lips were chapped and salty, tasting of blood and tears. You felt his shaking hands wrap around your waist as his tongue slipped past your lips.

You reluctantly pulled away from the kiss, lungs burning dully. You felt your heart stop when you looked at him. Even completely destroyed in front of you it was impossible to ignore his beauty. His cheeks dusted a light pin, eyes blotchy and red, making the grey storms that lurked there brighten with a melancholy light. He remind you of autumn leaves, he was so pretty just before he fell. You pulled him back into your secure embrace, your heart thumping loudly. You led your hands up his back resting them on his shoulders and tugging him towards you. You felt him nuzzle into your neck, inhaling sharply, attempting to engrave the scent of your shampoo in his head. His hands slid to your lower back, resting on the helm of your skirt as he shook violently.

“I love you.” You whispered through a thick wave of silent tears. You didn't let your voice break, too many things in that room had already been broken. “I love you so much, and everything is going to be okay. Its gonna be okay.”

And that's how you stayed, standing in the middle of a steamy kitchen, in the smell of curry and cumin, sauce burning in a saucepan on the stove, half sauteed vegetables littered around you like strange confetti. You repeated the last four words you spoke over and over again until you weren't sure who you were trying to convince. You stood like that when you heard loud rumbling footsteps come crashing to your door. You stayed like that as the chant of your impending doom continued up the stairs. The door bursting open. Four Arours came into the small room.

“Ma’m step away from him.” Spoke one of them.

“Sirius Orin Black you are under the arrest for the murder of Peter Pettigrew.” A young woman said.

You could no longer hide your tears as you shook with wails, tugging him closer to you. “I love you y/n.” He spoke quietly into your ear. “I love you so much.”

“I know,” You cried, “I love you too.”

Just as you finished your sentence you were ripped from his grasp. You struggled, delivering a harsh kick to the crotch of the man who held you. He fell to the ground with a groan as you scrambled back towards Sirius. Your wrist was snatched by a different Arour when you just millimeters from him. You spun towards the ground at the sudden gasp and landed with a harsh thump, as soft whimper escaping your throat.

“Don’t you dare touch her!” Sirius hollard Struggling with the two men holding him as he glared at the women who had dragged you to the ground, were she now also lay. One of the men raised his wand whispering ‘crusio’ Sirius let out a painful scream as he began to write in their grip,

Your vision went red. You landed your foot harshly onto the women Aruors face with a crunch. She shrieked as you darted towards the man holding his wand with a fiery rage. When you reached him you slammed your fist into his face with such force you felt your nails price the skin of your palm. He stumbled backward hand instinctively flying to his jaw, dropping his wand. You snatched the wand from the air and aimed it at second man prepared to unleash hell but before you could utter a spell. You heard a loud yell.

“Stupify!”

You flew across the room; flying straight in to your china cabinet. You felt your head thunk loudly on something as glass shattered around you. Your back felt like a pincushion, the needles of glass lodged into it. Your vision danced as you felt blood seep down your cheek.

“You fuckers!” The voice sounded so distant, like it was deep underwater, “She didn't do anything, you worthless sacks of shit!”

“Siri?” you quietly mumbled quietly and suddenly your vision went black.

You had awoken in a hospital, eyes fluttering open to fluorescent lights. The strong smell of medication and sickness made you want to gag. Suddenly the moments before your world fell, came rushing back to you in a sick wave. You sat up quickly gasping as you felt a searing pain in your lower back.

“Be careful, wouldn't want you to rip out those stitches.”

“Sirius?’ You asked excitedly. But soon your vision straightened and your eyes locked with a pair of hazel.

“Hey y/n/n.” Remus sighed, his voice strained. He looked terrible, his eyes bloodshot. Dark circles making his face appear sunken. The bright scars on his face blending with his pale complexion.

“Remus where's Sirius?” you asked. Maybe it was all a dream.

Remus felt tears climb slowly up to his eyes, he gasped for air as if he was being strangled, “None of us saw it coming y/n. I didn't expect you to.”

You let out a throttle whimper, “He didn't do it Re. I know he didn't. He would never hurt Peter orJames or Lily or Harry.” You gasped. “Harry?”

“You’re getting him,” Remus spoke attempting a smile that turned to a grimace.

“Where is he now?” You could feel tears seeping down your right cheek but, but not your left.

“Your house with your parents.” Remus respond as he watched you slowly raise your hand to the bandage just below your lf eye, now damp with salt. “From the china cabinet, your lucky you didn't lose your eye.”

“Who were those Arours. I’m going to get them fired.” You growled lowly.

“I don’t know y/n but-”

“They used an unforgivable curse on Sirius." You explained urgently to the man sitting beside you.

Remus cringed as you spoke his name. “Y/n. He was being arrested for murder, they can use whatever force necessary.”

“But it wasn’t necessary!” you cried out suddenly.

“Y/n/n, I don’t really think that’s gonna hold up in court. I mean it would be the word of four respectable Aurors, three of which you banged up pretty bad apparently, verses the confused and delirious fiance of a murderer.” Remus explained slowly as if he were talking to a child.

You felt blood rush to your cheeks as a dull ache that reminded you slightly of hunger, lodged into your heart. “Stop calling him that.” Your voice was dark and dangerous, for a split second, Remus was completely and utterly terrified of you.

“Y/n you’re going to have to come to terms with it eventually.” He sighed, his voice holding the disappointment of a mother scolding her child.

“He didn’t do it, Remus!” You shouted, “How can you possibly believe that-that Sirius would do anything to ever hurt James, hurt Lily, hut Harry? Do you really think that he would do that. Do you truly think that low of him?”

Each word you spoke was like a knife thrusting into his heart, “Y/n, you know how his parents were, how his brother was, how his whole family was. They had a stronger hold on him than he would ever care to admit, he was a lost cause.”

“Fuck you, Remus.” You spat, “He changed and you know it. He wasn’t like them. And if you truly believe that he did it, you clearly didn’t know him at all.”

“Y/n-”

“No. You are just using your brain. Your stupid logical brain and you only looked at the evidence. Your not looking at the fact that Sirius loved James. He was like a brother to him. No, he was a brother to him. He saved him. And if you think that Sirius would ever do anything to hurt James, Lily or their son, get the fuck away from me.”

The werewolf opened his mouth to speak but before he could utter a word you cut in.

“I said get out.”

He didn’t bother arguing with you. He could see the pain and misery that had consumed you. You were going to need time. You would come around eventually.

You never did.

The first year was the worst. The glances, the whispers, the points, the overwhelming sense of pity that made you just about want to drown. The only thing that kept you going was Harry. You had to stay sane, for him. If Harry wasn’t yours you would have gone crazy for sure, maybe ending up in Azkaban right next to your fiance. But you kept a straight face. And you pretended to accept what everyone else seemed to believe to be a fact.

You continued in the Order but it soon trickled out as Voldemort became less and less relevant. Once you were done with the Oder you got a job as a lawyer in a small law firm. No one at the firm was quite sure how, but you almost had a magical way of getting witnesses to confess directly on the stand.

You detach yourself from the magical world, know that soon you would have to plunge back into it with Harry soon enough. The years sped by, and soon enough you were taking Harry to platform 9 ¾. You damn near through up as you watched Harry walk onto that platform, images of a boy who had pulled your braids and helped you with Defense Against the Dark Arts years before flashed through your mind. It didn’t help that a young girl who impeccably resembled Lily kept looking your way.

By Harry’s third year you were heading to Hogwarts every other weekend to watch his quidditch matches. He was better than James. You thought of James and Lily often. Harry looked like James, but his eyes. His eyes would always be Lily. You only dared to think of Sirius in the deep of the night. When it was so dark that you couldn't see your hand in front of your face. So late you could convince yourself it was a dream. There was only one person who you kept in your mind constantly.

Peter Pettigrew.

You knew he was alive. You knew he was somewhere out there. You knew that he had murdered his best friends. You knew he was the reason Sirius was in jail. And you knew you were going to kill him.

You never spoke of Peter but your mind was clouded by red visions of him.

You had developed an unexplainable rage towards rats though. Well unexplainable to most.

But you had finally figured you how to live your life. You had finally mastered the act of pretending when the headline broke.

When you heard Sirius had escaped you fainted. Harry had shown you the paper and you had crashed straight to the ground. Not but a day later your house was swarming with Aurors. Another thing you seemed to hate beyond a reasonable amount.

After the people you referred to as vultures left you had met up with Remus, who seemed convinced that Sirius was attempting to kill Harry. You had wanted to slap him. But you swallowed the ever-growing ball of hate and nodded along like a simple-minded bobblehead someone had just flicked.

You knew you were being watched, you could see their eyes everywhere, following your every move. You kept quiet silently praying Sirius has lost his dumbass energy in jail and had enough sense to stay away from you. He did.

Reus had called you at 8:00 at night. “Y/n. You need to come here right now.” his voice was so desperate that you couldn’t refuse.

“Where to?” Your voice was a hushed whisper.

“You know the place we used to camp as kids? James would always try to scare you and always end up getting punched in the face.”

“Of course. How could I forget?” You giggled slightly the memory of campfires and smores, the feeling a leather jacket that was always wrapped around your shoulder. “I’ll see you in five.”

You once again filled your head with images of that small clearing, the large tree to the right side that you would always try (and fail) to climb. The circle of stumps you had dragged over as James harassed Lily. The scent of pine always so strong and fresh. And then you opened your eyes and you were there.

The stumps were decaying into the ground, moss covering them like a blanket of green. Dusk was setting in and the world was growing dark. You could see the lights of Hogwarts in the distance. You glanced up your eyes landing on the one star that shone brightly in the heavy grey sky.

“Sirius.” You mumbled to yourself. The name rolling off you tongue so easily it hurt.

“Y/n!” Remis ran towards you his eyes wide with a mixture of panic and excitement.

You turned towards him whipping your hair around. For a second you could have sworn your name had fallen out of someone else’s lips.

“We have to go. Come on.”

You followed obediently until you reached the outskirts of the forest.

Remus stopped suddenly running back to face you. “You have to change.”

“Change?” you asked. He nodded expectantly. Suddenly you remembered. “But Re I haven’t-”

“You need to.”

You sighed closing your eyes and intaking a sharp breath. You felt yourself shrink and grow a fur coat until when you opened your eyes you were looking at Remus’ knees.

The werewolf smiled down at the pretty black dog below him. You smiled wolfishly at him flashing a pair of sharp k-9 fangs. He just chuckled before sprinting through the grounds.

You followed easily jogging beside the man. When you reached the whomping willow you wait for Rums to pull his trick before darting into the small cave at its trunk.

As the cavern began to open up you switched back, happy to be walking on two legs again. Remus soon caught up with you as you entered the shrieking shack.

There he was, his back turned, hair a frizzy mess you almost giggled childishly at. You felt your heart soar to your throat.

“Ah, Moony, took you lon-” His sentence dropped. As he turned. His eyes locking with yours as you struggled to keep a straight face. Sirius’ eyes widened mouth dropping. “Oh my god.”

He took two steps toward you, so hesitant and careful, as if moving any faster would cause you to bolt. “Y/n?” his voice was broken.

“I’m sorry?” You spoke holding back a shit-eating grin, “Do I know you from somewhere?”

His face crumpled and you felt a wave of guilt was over you. He stumbled backward stuttering for words. His mind spinning.

Finally, you broke into a smile, “I’m only kidding Siri.” you giggled, only seconds after you finished your sentence you felt your body collide with his.

His arms wrapped around you so tight you felt your breath squeezed form you lungs. Your heart raced as you nuzzled closer to the man, you felt tears prick your eyes, “I could never forget you.”

Taglist: @accio-rogers @roslea @k3nz-doodl3 @songforhema

2K notes · View notes

nightmaretyrantvantas · 4 years

Text

When tensions break too often- a dark side au story

So I got my ideas back for some angst and some tension in this au, and I just couldnt resist writing it. Plus its a good way to warm me back up into doing things for this au.

This is also a bit of a deeper dive into the dynamics of darkside! Virgil and the other dark sides and how they all bounce and thrive off each other, as well a some backstory and peeks at the full effects of Deceit leaving( jealousy is with the dark sides but is only mentioned, he currently doesnt make much of an appearance in this one in particular, he gets his own angst later)

This was fun to write, not gonna lie. Its been awhile an this is gonna be long so buckle up with me

I also got alot of inspiration to finally write this out(and revise parts of it) due in part to @aimasup ‘s recent comics and writings about their kid sides(which I love, like alot alot and I hope they dont mind me getting super inspired by it!)

ships: Past prinxiety, past anxciet, implied intruxiety, implied intrulogical, implied intruloxiety, implied one sided remus x wrath, implied past demus, implied current roceit

Im putting a trigger warning here for cussing, fighting(verbal and physical), descriptions of panic attacks and emotional breakdowns, violence, gross and inappropriate language, some body horror descriptions, as well as implied unsympathetic sides(all sides are morally grey but the perspective is biased towards the dark sides as its seen from Wrath’s view- keep that in mind)

Things are about to get angsty my friends but i promise it ends happy(for once in this au)

I hope you guys enjoy

~~~~~~~~~~

Wrath Sanders had a lot more patience then almost everyone gave him credit for. Most considered him the biggest hothead there was, going off at the first irritation. But, the truth was he was eerily patient...Sure he may simmer and seethe and hold onto things in unhealthy grudges, but he never lost his cool as often as some would want you to believe.

Wrath Sanders kept his cool during many things, even if that was the last thing he wanted to do.

He had sat back through many things, biting his tongue to hold back the venom and yelling and grinding his teeth together in anger and forced himself to sit through many many things that happened around him out of respect- out of a deep fucking respect- for Virgil’s Fear’s Anxiety’s authority. Instead, he watched shit go down over and over again and held himself back from reacting towards the problem, focusing his energy on the recovery.

But, the most recent event was his last fucking straw.

It had happened seemingly out of nowhere, Wrath had been slumped down on their shitty lumpy couch boredly watching some dumb movie. It was getting later in the night, around 10 maybe 11 and he had one of Remus’s crappy beers partially drank in his hand. He was just getting up to change the movie or turn it off all together when the whole house seemed to shift violently, the walls seeming to tremble. There was a moment of confusion before he heard it.

“ Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

His whole body jolted to its feet unsteadily as the sound of Anxiety’s pain wreaked scream filled the house to an almost deafening volume as it distorted and deepened. His body moved before his mind, lurching over the couch and running for the source of the scream as another one wailed out even louder than the first, the sound muffling the breaking bottle and violently shaking the walls with their reverb. He heard other sounds too underneath, glass shattering heavy objects banging and wood splintering, wallpaper shredding. A third screech rang out, cutting itself in half with echoing high pitched sobs.

He hadnt been the first to make it to his room.

Wrath watched as he turned the corner in time to see Remus destroy Anxiety’s door with his morning star, a wild and desperately freaked out look to his glowing eyes as wood splintered and gave out under the weapon, some sending cuts into his cheeks. The creative side was then out of sight in a flash, forcing his way into the room yelling as to be heard over the screams.

Remembering the pain, the fear the absolute panic in Remus’s normally confident voice sent a deeper chill down his spine than the screams had.

“ Virgy??!! Fuck fuck fuck fUCK!! Virgy no no! Its me dammit!! Fuck FUCK FUCK!! No no NO! Virgy virgy virgy storm cloud creepy cryptid no no nnonononono look at me no no look at me cmon honey look at me not those at me. me me me me..” His voice continued, shaky and softening as the screams faded into heart wrenching sobs and high pitched hyperventilating gasps. Remus continued to speak, morning star thudding against carpet and a softer thud sounding.

“ Hey hey hey hey hey hey...hey hey hey I got you I got you I’m here im still here....i’m always here for ya honey...I got you now I got you see? Yeah yeah thats me....just focus on me....cmon cmon stormy cant pass out on me now...follow my breathing lets breathe together...in...out...in out...now....tell me five things you can see....cmon honey you got this just look up im here right here...”

The sight through the broken door haunted him, made his chest throb hard and bile burn his throat.

The bedroom before him was completely trashed. It was as if something feral and destructive had ripped it from its very foundation. Every piece of furniture, big or small, was broken and smashed apart, the anxious side’s bed and couch ripped into multiple pieces. Every shelf or flat surface had faced an even worse fate, thrown around and shattered into various pieces that had been strewn around the room along with glass fragments from anything unfortunate enough to have been made of glass. Papers and books were severed and torn apart viciously, and the wallpaper was slashed in huge wide cute, some of the slashes cutting deep into the wall underneath. And in the middle of the disaster was Remus and Anxiety. Long, protruding limb like dark shapes sprouted from the purple side’s back, twitching and trembling with adrenaline along with his heaving, hunched over shaking form. Remus was there in front of him, knelt down to the balled up figure and slowly but surely coaxing him up enough to pull him into his arms and rock him back and forth as he kept speaking to him. It took Wrath a few seconds of his vision adjusting to the room’s darkness to realize Remus had more cuts on him, and why.

Strings.

Millions of purple tinted, tautly pulled strings, like a tightly woven and intricate sickening spider web filled the room from top to bottom as if trying to shield the two in its depths. He could see parts of them hanging limp, likely from Remus forcing his way through to the other. He watched in a horrified shock as Anxiety’s body lurched and jerked with his piercing sobs, hand harshly digging into his scalp through his hood and shadowy claws threatening to rip said hood open. He could see many of the strings connected directly to various parts of his body and to the eight extra things on his back and it made him shudder. The room radiated a sort of fear and panic that was infectious, suffocating even. But he refused to leave the doorway and abandon the two there, in that too dense darkness.

He watched Remus manage to gather up the shorter side into his chest and rock him more, practically curling into a ball over him. He was still talking, his voice softening to the point he couldnt make it out anymore from the door. But he could see his expression. God his expression mightve been what pushed him past his bullshit accepting limit.

Remus’s face was grim, any traces of his grins and normal attitude gone. His eyes were glowing in a dark, dangerously violent fury but the way they stayed trained on Anxiety kept them, for the time being at least, soft and remorseful. There was so much pain there in that focused gaze, pain regret sorrow a disturbing amount of fear and understanding. His mouth moved with words not meant for Wrath to hear, soft gentle coos and reassurances too intimate to be heard by anyone else but the one trembling harshly in his strong arms. Brows furrowed and it made Wrath feel even colder to realize his hands, hands that were holding the other up and petting his hair through that black hood and rubbing between the spidery appendages, were trembling.

Remus was trembling.

After awhile the strings seem to fade away into nothing, those shadowy limbs following them scarily slow. Once that happened and the worst of the darkeness seemed to dissipate was when Wrath dared to take a few stiff steps into the room, debris crunching too loudly under his boots. He saw Remus stiffen and his eyes flicker up like a cornered, ready to attack animal before relaxing, glow never leaving.

“ W...wh..r...R-remus...”

“ Des...Dessy brat...h-hey spitfire do me a solid and go open my door ok? Dont worry itll lead to my bedroom...just...go open it for me...will you...?” Wrath’s voice failed him after that and he nodded, backing out of that suffocation and away into the brighter lit hall rushing from the room to push open the dark stained door further down. He turned around to go back, to try to help somehow...anyway he could, when he watched Remus instead picking his way out of the mess and into the hall, their leader cradled in his arms limply like a small sleeping child. Not a sound came from either of them as he stalked through the hall and into his room, a single nod dismissing Wrath before the door swung shut in front of him...

That was where he was drawing a line. Enough had been enough.

Wrath had sat back through many things, too many fucking things than he should have. He held back his doubts when Virgil and Roman had first started seeing each other when they were younger and dumber, had held himself and barely held Remus back from mauling the so called “good” creativity when things had gone awry and he had broken Virgil’s heart and left him in bitter, resentful pieces for them to pick up and help mend back together. He held back every time Thomas had, intentionally or unintentionally, slighted and undermined their jobs as a part of him, of their importance, of Virgil’s and Remus’s importance to him. He had sat back through the aftermath of ever fight with the “light” sides and with thomas, through every dismissal and banishment and arguement and accusation. He had helped and been there through countless sleepless nights and previous breakdowns and panic attacks between all four three of them, and he had been here, had been forced not to retaliate as per Virgil’s simple request.

“ Dont Des....dont go after them...Im forbidding it got it? Dont do it. it isnt going to be worth it...please...”

It had always been the please, soft and defeated that made him obey. Not the angry snaps and lashing out, not the cruel words and push and shove they all did for so long, but the plea in that word...the vulnerability it revealed.

He had sat through Deceit’s slow distancing from the rest of them...and his eventually leaving them for the light sides and the ensuing pain and breakdown that his leaving left behind.

It had splintered them, had struck both Virgil and Remus harder and more painfully than either side would verbally admit. Wrath had been forced to do nothing but helplessly watch it break them and break himself too, and try to clean up the aftermath best he could.

But this breakdown, seeing the side that had always stubbornly refused to buckle or back down reduced to a screaming sobbing wreck on the floor, seeing the other side he had always seen be nothing but strong and indifferent to everything thrown with a grin shaking in fear and softly pleading was too much.

He had stayed down, seething, resentment festering for years. too many years without an outlet.

He remembered the hand that had been held out to him all those years ago. Remembered coming along a little bit before Deceit ever did...and looking up from where he was angrily crying on the floor to see two figures before him. One was shorter, with two sets of brightly glowing purple and green eyes and a big black hoodie that was too big for him and messy hair that fell into his face. Behind him was someone much taller, with wild hair and a single streak of white in it, eyes feral and gleeful i a way that made him tense and made him mad through his tears. He was dressed extravagantly, like a prince or even a king grinning unnaturally wide. But his focus narrowed on the purple one, whose dark claw tipped hand stretched out in front of him in an offering. When Anger had put his head back in his knees to cry more he felt an arm drape over him. His head snapped up and he saw the princely one next to him with a softer expression, hand rubbing his back a little.

“ Hey....hey its ok Anger. Whatcha crying for? You did your job! Pretty damn well too! You were amazing the way you had Thomas screaming at that bully!” A clawed hand smacked him making him yelp and he looked in front of him to see Fear knelt in front of him with a look of understanding, a bitter smile on his face.

“ He’s right you know? You were only doing your job...you didnt realize how out of hand things would spiral and thats ok. How they reacted isnt your fault...”

They offered him a place to go, a place to thrive. Screw the others that refused to understand and stay with them. And Fear led them both deeper down the halls by the hand, making sure he didnt get lost

He was done standing down.

Someone needed to pay.

~ ~ ~

If he was honest, Wrath wasnt sure how long he sat outside the intrusive side’s shut door, sitting slumped against the opposing wall in a thick, deafening silence. It mustve been long enough for him to drift into an uneasy, restless sleep. His dreams filled up with memories of younger years, of pranks and scuffles and violent roughhousing the three of them got up to being on their own, of Remus making meals and running around frantic to keep both Anger and Fear from accidentally killing themselves or each other on something. Of Deceit hazily joining their trio, hesitant and quiet but able to snap back just as viciously and able to rough house back just as good as the rest of them after awhile. Of days filled with shrieks, squeals, bickering and shrilly laughter, of restless nights where they all broke into Remus’s room and dog piled on his bed to sleep. Of slowly growing up and watching Virgil come out of his quiet observance and transition from Fear to Anxiety and taking charge as a leader among them, of Remus stepping back and letting him with full confidence as his right hand and partner in crime in most cases. Of seeing Deceit come out of his terrified shell and blossom into a belovedly bitchy and...supposedly self assured side...of Virgil’s echoing screams that seem to reverberate through his very core...

He jolted awake at the sound of a door creaking, and sluggishly lifted his head to see a pair of familiar scuffled riding boots, laces fraying if you looked close enough. He lifted his gaze higher and soon locked onto tired green eyes that were dark and dull from exhaustion. Lifeless was a term he could describe those eyes with and that fact made him briefly queasy and cold. He looked tired, so very tired, and older. He was older than them both....but right now he looked much older than he was...There was a silence between them for a few moments that allowed Wrath to rouse himself up a little more.

“ Dessy....for all thats unholy...what’re you still doin out here dumbass? Did you stay there all night?”

‘Dessy’...‘ Des’ the nickname eased some of his shot nerves. Ever since they were kids they had joked that his name shouldve been “ Despair” instead of “ Daniel Williams” because of his very present pessimism and negative outlook. And soon it became so much more fitting that his nickname became “ Des” short for despair...or in Remus’s case “ Dessy” as he oh so enjoyed calling him. The annoying nickname was familiar though, and it helped him relax enough to speak. His voice was rough and awkwardly quiet in the small hallway, as if he’d been the one screaming.

“ I....wanted to make sure he’d be ok...” He trailed off, voice faltering with a clear shake. It sounded pathetic and weak to him.

But maybe, just this once pathetic and weak wasnt a bad thing. Because at the sound of his voice, and his dumb reason, Wrath saw some life flicker back into the older side’s eyes, some of their glow returning. Remus let out a tired, exasperated sigh and gave him a small sad smile, his expression softened into something sorrowful yet fond. That fondness, that softness sent warm tingling butterflies fluttering through his chest like it always did despite the grim circumstances. Remus let out a strained chuckle and shook his head, pulling his door shut with a quiet click.

“ He’s asleep now ya little Tasmanian devil...let him rest and we’ll check on him in a bit...now cmon, lets go make some breakfast and watch some movies or something....lets go up up.” With a grunt Des allowed himself to be heaved up by the armpits to his feet and didnt protest Remus wrapping an arm around him and guiding him down to the living room. He didnt want to see that pained exhaustion on his face...he needed to do something

and had a problem he was finally going to get rid of.

“ No Des you cant.”

There was that feeling as familiar to him as breathing bubbling in his chest, that hot smoldering feeling of anger or irritation igniting. It flushed out the cold he had been feeling in an unpleasant way but he ignored that part, pressing his palms flat on the table with a bit of force as he narrowed his orange eyes at the one across from him. He felt something like acid stinging his mouth and begging to be spilled free but he did as he usually did and grit his teeth to hold the worst of it at bay. Pushing it down. Holding back again.

“ Not again Remus. I refuse to just fucking sit back and do nothing again. They need to be taught a lesson! This is all their fault- all his fault--”

“ Even if it is so fucking what?! You blindly lashing out at them is only going to make things worse I can promise you that--”

“ Like hell it will!! They act like they can just walk all over us and treat us like fucking trash and cause things like last night and you think im lashing out blindly when--”

“ --When youre temper is as violent as a fucking feral mongoose--” “ Dont call me a fucking mongoose beetlejuice reject!!” “ Oh shut up and sit back down you twerp!!”

They went back and forth across the table, both their tempers and volumes raising as they fought. That bubbling feeling was twisting into a boiling, growing burning that began filling his chest and core. Why was Remus not agreeing with him for fucks sake--

His vision started tinging red.

“ Look brat you think I fucking like this?! You think im not pissed the fuck off?! Because I am! I’m beyond pissed off about this!! About the fact I know exact who and what caused Virgy’s breakdown and about the fact it happened at all!! I fucking get it!! But even I know you shouldnt just storm in there to take off trying to take off their fucking heads when youre too upset! Youre not thinking clearly enough for that kind of confrontation dammit im trying to protect you in this too!!” Remus’s words were loud, ruthless, and hard hitting. There were angry and forceful and made sense.

Plenty of sense.

And somehow that made him even angrier.

“ Oh? Ooooh! I get it, I fucking get it! Now that youve been sweetening up fucking logic youre suddenly the first to fucking defend them hurting our fucking best friend--”

“--oh for fucks sake bitch Logan has nothing to fucking do with this!! Im not fucking defending them either!! I swear to god im just trying to--” “ --to what huh?! Keep on his good side so you can get in his fucking pants?! Or so you can fucking push it aside and laugh about it later like one of them?!--” “ Goddammit you fucking stubborn brat you dont know what youre even talking about--” “ I dont know what im talking about?! I DONT KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT?!?!” His voice rose much louder, his own trembling distortion coming out and getting spat at the side who had helped fucking raise him like venom.

“ I dont know what im talking about?!! You mean like how I NEVER seem to know what the fuck im talking about?! Like how Virgil never knows what hes talking about or how you never seem to know what youre fucking talking about when your talking to them?! God now youre even starting to sound like those pretentious bastards!! Dont know what im talking about?! What part do I not know what im talking about Intrusive Thoughts?! huh??!!” His breath was coming out in ragged, squeaking pants as his eyes began to burn “Which fucking part do I not fucking know?! The part where ive had to sit back and bottle up my rage at being pushed aside and degraded and judged and dismissed or having to sit back for fucking years and watch you and virgil get hurt and hurt and ignored and dismissed and talked down and insulted and broken and having to swallow my protests of it?! Or of knowing last night fucking happened because Deceit decided to fully live up to his fucking name and abandoned us for those bastards and left us alone without a second thought and got away with it?! Or the fucking fact youre too busy trying to bone down logic to even fucking care--!!”

Smack!

It came so fast he hadnt had time to prepare for it before his head was snapped to the side and pain exploding in his face, on the cheek near the jaw in particular as he staggered to the ground a good foot and his eyes eerily slow dragged themselves from looking at the kitchen cabinets to Remus, who still had his fist outstretched near where it had collided with his face, his chest heaving almost like his own was, eyes wild and just as angry before a flash of realization went through them.

“ ....Des....fuck...i...you...” Nothing too coherent came babbling out Remus’s mouth, he was still way too hoped up on anger fueled adrenaline. His fist was starting to tremble and Wrath watched his pupils dilate a few times in his attempt to calm down.

And then there was something like an explosion as that burning feeling warped into a raging fire and Wrath let out a infuriated, inhuman shriek and lunged for Remus with a full intent to rip out his stupid fucking throat as his rage consumed him.

The two fighting sides went crashing into the living room loudly nearly knocking over the couch in their wake, both of them screaming and Wrath inhumanly screeching in an almost reptilian manner as he clawed and punched wherever he could reach. Remus wasnt just lying down and taking it either, yelling in loud angry spats of soon unraveling nonsense as he fought back mercilessly, throwing the other into walls, into furniture, throwing punches and kicks of his own. But nothing seemed to slow the orange side down and he struck back with slowly growing claws and fangs and something sharp growing out of his hair, angry tears burning his eyes and his voice too warbled and distorted to even be understood anymore, both their forms twitching and subtly shifting and glowing as they tried to rip each other to shreds, things fluid dripping and twisting lashing out from Remus’s back. Remus was stronger, he always had been, but Wrath had a seemingly endless stream of fury and adrenaline that kept him getting back up and charging in for more, the room being wrecked between them. Maybe things would have gone too far if it hadnt been brought to a hard, screeching halt.

By the time they could both blink they were ripped away from each other, both now uselessly struggling as they were entangled in roughly restraining strings that glowed a eye straining, furious purple color and seemed to tighten and wrap around them more the more they fought and struggled for freedom. Their indecipherable words and incoherent screams where just as ruthlessly cut short as strings wrapped warningly around their throats, not tight enough to actually choke or hurt them, but firm enough to be very present and felt, their voices being quite literally silenced the moment it touched looped once and touched the spot over their vocal cords. There was a horrifically tense silence as their mouths moved in spat insults and screams that never made a sound.

“......that....that is enough out of both of you.”

Virgil’s voice cut through the room like a cleaver, the tone dead, cold, and just as pissed off as they were. At first they couldnt see him, manic eyes darting around until Wrath saw the Duke’s eyes trained on top of the stairs near the hallway, pupils down to small pinpricks. When he glared over in that direction he fully understood and felt all that anger draining and quickly turning into a queasy, cold dread that made him want to cower.

That radiation of fury, or bone chilling fear and a kind of suffocating anxiety that made it hard to breathe and a panic that made them both feel like they were perpetually falling and simultaneously drowning swept over the living room like a flood, the corners and ceilings slowly developing intricate pulsing webs or strings that seem to absorb the rooms light as Virgil stepped, no, half crawled down the stairs and into view. Both sets of eyes were visibly, the whites dyed a void like inky black where his brightly burning purple and green irises cut into them coldly. Something sharp and gleaming poked from his scowl and revealed themselves as fangs as his snarl curled his lips. His hood was up hiding most of his pale skin but couldnt hide the flecks and scatterings of void like, inky and purple spots dusting parts of his slowly purple tinging skin. His hands, snapping out from his sleeves to grip the stair railing were fully blotched in that void, fingers curling into razor sharp claws that strings hung stickily too. The eight dark appendages, opaque and gangly half carried him down faster than usual, the ends digging into the carpet as if for stability. A shrill hiss whistled through Anxiety’s teeth and the panic inducing feeling of being stared at at being excruciatingly examined came from every corner, growing worse and worse as he stalked closer with silent movements.

“ What....the actual fuck are you two doing.” The words with sharp edged and cold, tone flat and tired. They both just stared helplessly, unable to move or speak and both beginning to mindlessly panic. Virgil blinked and a gust of air like an exhale swepted through the room and....left no traces of those fearful horrified feelings in its wake. Both of their feet thudded mutedly against the carpeted floor as the strings released them and retreated back into nothing, disappearing from all around them as if they had never been there to begin with...the room never dimmer than it had started in the morning light and the three of them stood there in silence. Any hints of inhumanity were gone from Anxiety’s form, leaving his two still glowing eyes losing their luster and leaving dull annoyance behind, no fangs, no extra limbs, no claws, no void dotting his skin. When he spoke he took a slow breath, as if unable to breathe just like them.

“....I...I mean it you two...what. the actual fuck did you two wake me up with.” Even his voice had returned to normal, if not for a bit shaky and hoarse from last nights screaming. Wrath saw his eyes were bloodshot, and his face was tinged with blotchy pink and was puffy from crying and something clenched in his chest, thudding hard. He looked at Remus, who was panting from lack of breath, eyes dull and exhausted and pain filled again, injuries from their fight blaring from the blood decorating his body and clothes.

He had done that....he’d lost control again...

“ Im dont want to repeat myself a third fucking time. What the fuck did you--”

“ I...This is my fault I started it...” Both of them looked at him, gazes drilling into him. But he let his head drop as shame took over, choking him a little. This was his family and they were already hurting and look what he’d done-

“Oh piss off Dessperato. It aint only your fault I fucked up too. Look virgy we were both tired and coming off that dumb worry adrenaline shit and we started arguing...and we got waaaaaay too heated and decided to beat the living shit out of each other...sorry we woke you you were suppose to sleep later.” Virgil let out a sigh and rubbed his temples, pulling off his hood and shaking out his messy bedhead.

“ Is that all that happened? Im not deaf and the doors arent sound blockers...” “ Then why are you asking.” Virgil and Remus as a bit of a stare off before finally, for the first time that morning all the life slowly returned to his eyes and he gave a toothy, blood streaked grin and started to laugh. The other two looked at him like he had fully lost it. Then Virgil’s lips twitched up and Des rolled his eyes and failed to stop the grin spreading across his face or the chuckles that he managed to choke out. Within a few minutes all three of them were laughing on the messy living room floor half sprawled over each other and Jealously bemusedly deciding they werent capable of making breakfast and making it for them all instead. Des watched half delerious from his exhaustion as Remus cackled and kicked his leg, just to laugh more when he kicked back.

“ I swear to god no more violence out of you two or I swear I’ll...” Remus let out a snort and gripped the other’s chin between his fingers sensually tugging their faces closer with a smug grin

“ You’ll what Hot Topic? Lock me in the closet again? Or send me reeling with nightmares and hallucinations~ Oh please virgy baby I dare you too~” His tone was light and suggestive, quirking his eyebrows up teasingly for added effect. Virgil snorted and and grinned back leaning close as well.

“ Oh dont start teeempting me with those sweet talkins about hallucinations dr. Hideous~ I might just take you up on that...” Then he flicked his nose and shove him away, both of them laughing. Des was about to try to give them the time to themselves when Remus yanked him between them waggling his finger disapprovingly, making him whack the other’s shoulder with a affectionate “ fuck RIGHT off” and for awhile, in that growing morning light, things felt ok.

It had taken alot of talking, and another arguement almost breaking out between himself and virgil to convince him to back down from confronting the light sides violently. Virgil brought a surprising amount of identical points to remus, while also reminding him that reacting to violently will only make them ignore and dismiss him further. Des was very reluctant, and stubborn, but ultimately he trusted Virgil’s and Remus’s judgement. He trusted Virgil’s reasoning and that he was looking out for him- protecting him. So when he asked him, softly, to refrain from trying to handle it on my own and let him deal with it Des had agreed, obeying his request.

And then a real tipping point pushed him back over the edge.

It was a few weeks later. He remembered distinctly because the mindscape was abuzz with excitement, even the dark sides were effected by Thomas’s unbridled joy. But Virgil had said he was getting a bad feeling...and headed off to the main part of the mindscape that morning. Things were quiet after, calm even. At some point him and Remus had started playing cards, though Remus was blatantly cheating and they were bickering.

Things were fine...things were calm...

Then Virgil crashing into the living room breathing harshly and in the midst of a bad panic attack.

They both jumped up and Remus caught the other in his arms, trying to calm him down and figure out what happened. It took a long time and for awhile they only got bits and pieces out

Thomas

A callback, a big important one he and Roman were thrilled for

Patton, something with both Patton and Deceit

Neither of them agreeing but both of them fighting Virgil

some kind of important friend event on the same day

they had argued, they had fought, there had been yelling by the climax of it

Him and Roman went at each others throat despite the fact he had been trying to help roman’s cause

Deceit fought him alot too, trying to cut him off at every chance in a form of fear response, out of defense

Him and patton argued and fought badly for the first time since Thomas’s last breakup

He thought logan would try to see his side and be a neutral party

Logan was getting tug of warred into agreeing to arguments to push him out

They kept trying to shut him down and dismiss him, they stopped listening fairly

Virgil had to pull out a form shift in front of thomas

He had to use his influences and fear to get them to stop talking over him and twisting his words

it only made things worse, and arguments harsher

They rejected him and his attempts to help more

He started having a panic attack mid argument

He thought logan and patton tried to help but they were getting drowned out by Roman and Dee

There was so much yelling, things that should never be said got thrown

They told Virgil he never does anything but make Thomas worse

Thomas finally nearly screamed for them all to stop and half asked half pleaded for Virgil to just leave until everyone calmed down

He lashed out and hit someone, he wasnt even sure who before he fled, not hearing them yell after him. It mightve been patton, or thomas, or maybe logan

And then his panic attack got worse and neither of them could get another understandable word from him.

In the end Remus eventually got him called down, after a good couple hours of trying, and it took everything in Wrath not to scream and destroy the room.

All Virgil did was try to help, and look what their....their bullshit left him. He was beyond seething at this point, he was fuming he was downright practically breathing fire and shaking from the effort to keep himself still. Remus gave him a cautious warning look, as if he was sizing up one of his many monsters in the imagination and debating if it would kill him or not and Virgil lifted his head to choke out for him to stand down, and to not do anything. Wrath had nodded silently and waited, watching Remus help him upstairs to his room to grab his headphones, and hopefully calm down more. Once they were out of sight he made a decision. He knew the consequences of it, knew theyd both be furious and Virgil would make hell for him for it. But none of that mattered to him

For the first time in many many years...he disobeyed Anxiety’s direct request.

It took a few days to find an opening, but once he saw one he took it, rising up in the big main living room, unknowingly in the middle of a video brainstorm.

Wrath always seemed to appear near the couch, between Roman and Thomas. Just seeing them made his blood boil more than it had been.

It was easy to say he scared the shit out of most of them by just appearing, his entire presence sucking the air from the room and making it hot and tense, a cracked dam waiting to break. Itd been months since he’d seen them face to face, and for a moment his senses got overwhelmed by everything.

But he let that fuel his anger further and he growled for them to fess up. Which one had said it. Roman had of course jumped to the defensive of his friends and that was all Wrath needed.

He lost it, pointing and yelling and accusing Roman. Blaming him for it. Roman didnt back down and fought back, and the fight only seemed to worsen. The others tried to interject, and maybe if Wrath’s vision hadnt been blood red from his fury he wouldve seen they were trying to diffuse the situation and calm things down, talk things out. But he ignored that, whipping around and lashing out at them too

“ Wrath you need to step back and take a deep breath! Youre getting irrational!”

“ Wrath kiddo please we dont have to yell and scream about this Logan’s right lets all take a deep breath ok?”

“ Like hell! Im not going to just let him force his way in here and yell and scream and pretend its ok and we can talk!”

“ Roman please!” “ro stop getting angry back is just making all of it worse the others are right we need to be calm or we’ll never get through to him.”

That voice. Silken and soaked with caution. He whirled around on Deceit and snarled pinning him to the wall without thinking.

“ This is all your fucking fault! Youre the reason they keeping hurting and virgil has breakdowns that put him out of commission for days!! Youre part of the reason Remus locks himself away beating himself up. they trusted you!! We all trusted you and you decided to fuck us over and throw us out like trash!! Was it worth it?!?! Was being here worth breaking the people you grew up with you and loved you?! Well?!” There was yelling around them, and he thought briefly he heard Remus’s and Virgil’s voices behind him as well. But now all that anger, that pushed down bitterness and resentment finally had a target and he couldnt focus on anything else. He didnt even heard Deceits struggling answer as he tried to claw him off, his different eyes wide and his mouth moving in words that werent registering.

“ -youre right ok?! Fuck youre not right at all--fuck fuck I get it youre angry and I fucked up with this, this isnt my fault and I havent been trying to figure out ways to fix it! I totally havent been beating myself up for what happened a few days ago with virgil and I dont regret it ok--” THe words blended together in his head, there were hands on his shoulders ripping him away the the freaked out snake and shoving him into the couch. He snarled but froze when he realized He was staring at the very formal business end of Remus’s morning star, inched from his nose and Remus standing over him with a dark look over his face...dark and upset The red faded from his vision and he blinked rapidly, eyes burning again and jaw aching from how hard he’d been clenching it or from yelling he honestly couldnt even tell anymore. From behind Remus stood both Logan and Virgil, side by side speaking in rapid low voices he couldnt decipher. Behind them he caught of glimpse of Roman and Patton both kneeling on the floor, fretting over a still freaked out Deceit as Jealously offered to help him up. Wrath was struggling to breathe, his body twitching and shaky from the quickly fading adrenaline. Soon he was left feeling cold and sick of himself, staring at Remus with just as wide and wild eyes.

“ Easy....easy spitfire....youre...just breathe for me ok?” He couldnt even nod, he couldnt move. He vageuely noticed Virgil and Logan both looking at him before the morning star was gone and Logan was in front of him, hands palm up in a non-threatening manner.

“ Wrath can you hear me? Good...just listen to my voice...I need you to name me five things you can see.” He blinked rapidly and barely heard Remus’s and Virgil’s murmurs of reassurance. Or maybe Virgil’s was more quiet talking, as he was standing at Patton’ side like the normally bubbly side’s shadow.

“u...uuh....y..youre tie...r-remus’s outfit....the stairs...the others...and the Roman’s s-sword...” Logan gave a nod, slowly kneeling in front of him with a calm, leveled expression that helped him focus more.

“ Good, now four things you can touch. Take your time Wrath.” He flexed his fingers, more of a twitch really as his breathing began to even out slowly. “ Um...My jacket...the couch...my jeans...uh...t..the carpet?” He nodded again through his faltered stammering as the deepness faded.

“ Three things you can hear?” He blinked again and listened for a moment.

“ .....your voice...Remus’s voice...the others...” “ Two things you can smell, remember take your time.” “ Bacon...from breakfast...and someones cologne..” A small smile came to his face as he adjusted his glasses in slow noticeable motions.

“ Just just 1 thing you can taste.” He managed to smack his lips once and his face screwed up at the taste lingering in his mouth.

“ ....acidic bile...” Both their brows furrowed a little but when Logan looked over his shoulder Remus shrugged at the silent question.

“Probably needs to puke Dr. Maywhoo.” Logan sighed at the nickname and turned back to him, holding up his hands a little.

“ Now, Wrath Id life for you to unclench your jaw, roll and relax your shoulders, loosen your posture if you can, uncurl your fingers and exhale please.” He blinked and slowly did as instructed, not realizing until then that he was wound up like a jack in the box. His jaw ached as he unclenched it and his shoulders slumped heavily as he relaxed, fingers sore from apparently being curled into firsts for so long, small red lines in his palms from his nails. He felt calmer, drained and upset, but calm.

“ Logan, Remus.” He looked past them to see virgil standing up tall, if not awkwardly, besides Roman and watching them with a hard to read look.

“ I...think sitting down and calmly talking...is now long overdue.”

~~~~~

Hours later Wrath Des found himself on the mindscapes main couch tiredly nestled besides a dozed off Jealousy Jacob and a cheerfully talking Patton. They had spent hours haphazardly strewn around the very room, just...talking and discussing and airing years worth of grievences. It wasnt easy, and things were no where near fixed or completely repaired. But, there were many small positive steps taken in that direction...and things were lighter and better as they stood at a better understanding of each other. Things werent perfect, and in the back of his mind he could list everything that could fuck up and send them back spiraling. Yet he didnt want to ruin what...whatever it was happening as dinner was cooked. Logan, Remus, and Virgil all sat together on the other side of the couch chatting among themselves and with Patton as they tried to decide on a movie and played candyland. In the kitchen he could hear Roman and Deceit cooking and giggling with each other, trying to outdo each other with some dumb food based pick up lines. But they sounded happy, so many it wasnt that dumb...Des watched them play candyland, staying relatively quiet aside from answering questions and jabs sent his way. It was comfortable and relaxed, and Des couldnt help but yawn. Without noticing , he ended up resting his head on Patton’s clearly unoccupied and underutilized shoulder as his eyes drooped shut. He felt Patton jump a little before slowly relaxing, and he didnt even need to open his eyes to flip Remus off as he let out an overly exaggerated coo at the motion letting himself relax. Patton smelled good he decided. Like fabric softener and baked goods and some kind of spice...Des also decided that the blurry sight of the trio next to them, with Remus’s legs draped across Logan and Virgil’s laps and one hand playing with Virgils messy hair as he sat on Logan’s right and Virgil contently and fully relaxed into Logan’s left side, head resting in the crook of his neck and his hand laced with the logical side’s unused hand as they played was also good. The sound of Jacobs soft snores was soothing and the joyful flirty voices in the kitchen blended into it well when combined with Pattons soft humming. If this was how things would be more often....he’d learn to add a little more patience to his supply of the stuff....

And maybe for once he didnt have to be negative, with no more tension for now to be broken.

The end.

Ok holy shit its finally finished!! This was over 7k goddamn words of emotion and holy shit was it a rollercoaster to write

THis is what happened when I wake up before 5 in the morning after not being able to sleep much...I apparently bust out 15 whole pages worth of words

Now....to go do my chores real quick and go pass the fuck out for an hour or two of sleep

I hope you guys liked it!!!

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