#just coincidence or is there another explanation here?
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yaeggravate · 11 months ago
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just putting all the nabu malikata/nicole reeyn parallels side by side:
(every other witch uses an elaborate teacup but they deliberately chose to give nicole a simple cup, one which we've already seen before: in dawn winery. keeping the possibility that nicole is connected to dawn winery in mind:)
reeyn -> reeyn is derived from reine, queen; malikata is derived from MLKT which also means queen (malikata can also be derived from malayikata which means angels.)
nabu means prophet, nabu malikata foresaw her own death; nicole is a prophet
nicole is known as mage "N"; nabu starts with an n
after she disappeared, deshret dreamt of nabu malikata feeling her way in a crystalline maze, the inside of irminsul is a crystalline maze; nicole studies the order of the world and can sense when a change has been made to irminsul, the hexenzirkel is known for exploring the Irminsul
nabu malikata was a seelie/angel, who are known to guide humans and still do today in their huskforms, she also guided deshret; nicole is obsessed with guiding those who are lost
nabu malikata wanted to transcend above the shackles of the world; nicole is a disembodied voice
nabu malikata is known as the dream-mother, she was able to grant people dreams; nicole left a fable inside someone's dream
nabu malikata is the mistress of the orchard and wine and forgetting; dawn winery is a wine orchard
paimon calls nicole the voice from the sky, nicole tells her she's not entirely wrong; nabu malikata used to be a seelie/angel, a divine envoy from the heavens
kaeya has some odd connections to angels (not gonna list them all again its too much); nicole's teacups are in dawn winery where kaeya was taken to and grew up in
crepus told diluc the world would never turn its back on the faithful; in dragonspine there is a mural that says the angels help the faithful
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criminalamnesia · 9 months ago
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HIIII!!! I just wanted to say that i really love ur writing! I've read ur traitor series and I can't wait for part 4! I'm a new author, and english isn't my first language, so it's sometimes very hard for me to write bcs i'm stil not that good, but ur fics have helped me improve<3💗!
thank you so much!🫶 im glad you’ve enjoyed the series! and speaking of part four, here it is :)
ALL PARTS CAN BE FOUND HERE
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simon didn’t turn to watch you leave the gym.
he stood there, eyes forward, mask clenched in one fist. he could feel the blood drying on his skin. he made no move to wipe it away.
he didn’t blame you for your anger— he couldn’t. he understood the rage. had felt it himself a time or two.
but he couldn’t take everything lying down.
did he deserve your wrath, your fury? yes— and he knew that. there was no making up for what he did; he realized that, but why couldn’t you understand?
he’d never fully taken his walls down around you, and that was no fault of your own. he was a guarded man, and his past gave him every right to be.
he had been burned and broken too many times. he’d seen the people he loved murdered because of him.
he swore he would never let that happen again. he put those walls up, and you knocked some of them down.
but there were some you’d never gotten through, at least, simon told himself you hadn’t. there was always something he was holding back, a piece of himself he wouldn’t give freely. he told himself it was because he couldn’t stand to love you so deeply and then watch you leave.
but really, it was because he needed an out. he needed a way to justify his leaving if something ever happened— and that’s what got him here.
simon trusted the 141 with his life. he trusted his captain with his life. price had never led him astray; john knew his face well before any of the others. well before you.
and when someone you trust so deeply, someone you’ve followed for years, tells you that the person you love has betrayed your team?
you can’t help but believe them. and that’s what simon did.
the evidence was coincidental at first. wrong place, wrong time. but then, everything started to seem like more than a coincidence. pieces of a complicated puzzle were fitting together. things only you and the rest of the 141 would know were leaked.
and all the signs pointed to you.
and although he didn’t want to, simon couldn’t help it. the second price had confided in him that you may be the rat, simon began to distance himself. you had been confused, but he had offered no explanation.
price was the one to question you first. it was a heated conversation in his office, consisting of him showing you the evidence and you becoming furious at the accusations.
johnny came to you next, buttering you up with his flirtatious and unarming words before asking if you’d leaked information.
then there was kyle, who pleaded for the truth. he told you that a case was being built against you, and that if you came clean now, things wouldn’t be so bad.
simon never tried to talk to you about it. the other men would tell him what you’d said, but he had never gone to talk to you himself.
maybe it was pride. simon wasn’t trusting, not after his past. he had let the 141 in, had let you in. and now you were a suspected traitor, and he was angry at himself. angry he hadn’t seen it sooner; angry he’d let you in at all.
but maybe it was hurt. hurt that you’d done this to him, to the team, after knowing everything they’d been through. after stitching up wounds on the battlefield and taking bullets for one another. after sharing simon’s bed and whispering you loved him.
all he knew was that he trusted price. and as evidence built, so did the distance between the two of you, until you were tied to that chair.
and simon had taken his hurt, his anger, out on you. he wasn’t proud of it, and he knew now that he was wrong. but he was still a little angry. angry because you couldn’t see his side of things— not like he could see yours.
so, he was an ass. he didn’t apologize. he snuck flowers to your bedside but kept his distance. he told you to watch your tone because you were still part of the team, and speaking to price like that was only something an outsider would do.
and he told you that he’d spared your life because he had. anger had consumed him, and truthfully, you were lucky he hadn’t done worse.
even if he’d smothered his feelings for you with rage, he still harbored love for you, and that’s why some part of him held back.
he knew you would probably never forgive him. he had made his peace with that.
but he couldn’t stand the fact that you couldn’t understand why he’d done what he did.
the creak of the gym door opening broke simon from his thoughts. he pulled his mask back on before turning around and making his way to the door.
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it took one firm knock on the door for price to answer.
the door clicked open, and price sighed when he saw simon, scrubbing a hand over his unruly beard before letting the taller man in. price turned, walking back to his desk chair, while simon closed the door behind him and locked it.
“this is a bloody mess,” the captain said, falling heavily into the chair. it squeaked at the sudden weight, old leather crinkling and crackling.
“doc came and saw me earlier, ‘fore she left for the night. told me about some new injuries, and yelled at me for letting that happen.”
simon didn’t speak. price’s eyes met his, and he sighed again.
“fuckin’ hell, simon. what the fuck did you say? doc said she had to stitch up both their hands.”
“doesn’t matter what I say,” simon spoke, eyes still on the captain “they won’t fuckin’ listen.”
price shook his head. “that’s not true, ‘nd we both know it,” he sounded tired as he spoke, dark bags under his eyes. he paused for a moment, then spoke again.
“spoke to laswell after you left earlier. she said she’ll try to speed up the transfer process. tryin’ to avoid more fuss, and im not fightin’ it any longer.”
“they’re part of our team,” simon spoke, tone rough.
price shook his head. “they are, but I can’t keep doin’ this. can’t keep pushin’ off transferin’ because of you lot. it may be better for us, but not for them.”
the room fell quiet. simon inhaled, exhaled. his fists clenched at his sides before quickly unfurling once more.
he didn’t have a right to be mad at you for leaving, but he was.
“laswell say anythin’ else about tha’ transfer?” simon asked.
price leaned back in his chair, arms folded across his chest. “not much. no word on where or with who, but even if she knew, doubt she’d tell us. for their sake.”
simon gave a small nod and made to turn, but froze as price spoke again.
“she did say she didn’t know if it would go through. they’d have to pass another eval.”
they both knew what that meant. if laswell said that, then she didn’t believe the transfer would happen. kate wouldn’t outwardly say it, but price had known what she’d meant.
pushing the transfer through wouldn’t matter if you couldn’t pass a physical and psychological evaluation— and laswell didn’t think you could.
although he wouldn’t admit it, price was unsure, too. torture was something that took an incredibly devastating toll on the mind and body.
but torture at the hands of your team? there was no telling the damage that that would do to someone. to you.
an honorable discharge was more likely. and, if that was the case, then your rage would likely grow tenfold.
you career, your livelihood, taken from you by the hands of the men you trusted the most. your family, cutting you up and pushing you out.
damned by your team and your country, regardless of everything you’d done for both of them during your service.
you were just another cog in the machine, one that had been damaged and discarded, and a discharge couldn’t make that any clearer.
he thought back to what you had said in the gym earlier, before you’d left.
‘you should have killed me.’
maybe he should have.
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thanks to everyone for your patience! also just incase you didn’t see my post about it—
im no longer doing a taglist! my side blog @troiastitans will reblog my works from now on, so if you want to know when I post, follow that account and allow notifications!
as always, thank you for the love! (also I hope you all enjoyed a little peek into simon’s head!)
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greenfiend · 8 months ago
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The Significance of Lover’s Lake and Byler (Theory)
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'Cause we're lovers, and that is a fact
Yes we're lovers, and that is that (Heroes by David Bowie)
Part 2 here
(Warning: This post has mentions of sex (nothing graphic)… if you’re uncomfortable with that please do not proceed.)
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So, Lover’s Lake has existed within the show ever since season 2, when Will mapped out the entirety of Hawkins. The lake is shaped like a heart (keep this in mind for later) thus the name “Lover’s Lake”. Makes sense within the town of Hawkins, but does not provide an explanation on a subtextual level. None of the “lovers” existing within the show has been associated with the lake (you could say Steve/Nancy but honestly it’s a stretch since they never actually rekindled their romance.)
This leads me to the question… why call the lake “Lover’s Lake” without associating any lovers to it?
Because maybe, there will be lovers connected to it… but they aren’t lovers… yet.
Okay, let’s get back to the shape. A heart. ❤️ Hm. Now which character within the show is most associated with hearts? Which character is even referred to as the heart by their love interest?
Mike.
I don’t think it’s a stretch to say that he’s one part of the “lovers” here. Thus ruling out many other romantic pairings within the show. Leaving only two pairings: Mike/El and Mike/Will. I won’t go into detail on why I believe Mike and El will inevitably break up, you can read a lot of different analyses for that. So that leaves… Mike/Will. Not lovers yet.
Okay, here’s the part where I may get crucified. The definition of lovers.
Please put your pitch forks down for this.
Lovers usually refers to two people in a sexual relationship outside of marriage.
With all the subtext (and actual text) around sex and sexuality, and how we see Will struggle with his own sexuality, there is a likely conclusion here. He’s going to confront his sexuality. To do so, he will have sex. With whom? Well, with the one person he loves the most, the one he affectionately refers to as the heart… his best friend… Mike.
Now, where’s this going to happen? What better location than somewhere empty and secluded.
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Reefer Rick’s lakeside house.
Now, who is “Reefer Rick”?
Also known as, Rick Lipton, Reefer Rick is a drug dealer who’s closely acquainted with Eddie.
He’s an enigma. We never see him. All that is known about him are the things mentioned by other characters.
He’s currently in jail apparently for dealing drugs. Also, he seems like a town pariah.
Also, he isn’t too keen on Fast Times (returned on time), at least not as much as “Cheech and Chong” (returned late each time.) That shot at 53 minutes and 5 seconds in Fast Times doesn’t do it for him, I guess. Unlike watching two guys get high.
His name choice is an interesting one.
“Reefer” Rick Lipton.
“Reefer” is a synonym for “marijuana cigarette”. Okay, makes sense, he is a drug dealer after all. But why the term “cigarette”? Well… there’s this other word that also happens to be a synonym for “cigarette”…
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Then Rick�� short for “Richard”. Richard is one of the few names out there with a nickname that is also slang for male genitalia… “Dick”.
Then finally… Lipton.
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As Robin says, spelled like Lipton tea. Now, why would the writers use the name “Lipton” and even reference the tea company if there were no significance to it? They wouldn’t. We know this about them.
So why “Lipton”?
Let’s do a bit of research here, shall we?
The founder of Lipton tea was a man named Thomas Lipton.
Thomas Lipton just so happens to have been a closeted homosexual man who had a long term relationship with another man whose name is… *drumroll please*
William Love.
Okay, that can’t be just a coincidence right?
So moving on to Reefer Rick’s house.
We see glimpses of his living room, kitchen, and briefly his bedroom.
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Jason and his buds are searching for Eddie and this involves looking under the mattress? As if, Eddie could successfully hide under there? Haha okay sure.
The angle of this shot is interesting too, because the bed is essentially being shown off to us.
This bed with a blue blanket and yellow sheets. Hm. Interesting.
Keep in mind this scene is essentially unnecessary. They could have easily shown Jason et al searching for Eddie without creating an entire new set for a room that’s only used in one single insignificant shot. Therefore, I do not think it’s unreasonable to believe this is used for foreshadowing.
Then we also get this shot from outside the window into the bedroom.
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Look familiar? I thought so too.
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Okay. Now for my theory/prediction.
As I mentioned earlier, Will is currently struggling with his own sexuality and feels a lot of shame and internalized homophobia. There’s also a lot of evidence that Mike is experiencing the same thing. Unlike Will, Mike conforms to the society’s expectations. He dates El, performing as her boyfriend. This is comparable to Nancy’s arc in season 1. She also conforms, and like Mike, leaves her best friend behind. We all know how that ended.
Now, what better way to wrap up the show than to have Mike correct his sister’s mistake? To have Mike reject societal expectations in favour of his best friend?
Okay so this is my theory.
Mike and Will have their first kiss an episode or two prior to 5x07. Tensions are high, but they’re busy fighting interdimentional monsters along side their friends.
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Then comes 5x07 which somehow leaves Mike and Will alone by Lover’s Lake. The tension between them reaches an all time high, leading to a passionate kiss and then… more. Let’s just say it involves that blue and yellow bed.
At the same time as these two become the lovers they were meant to be, another character is being saved, or perhaps being brought back to life. Perhaps another red head, one we all know and love. Yes, a major parallel and contrast to Steve/Nancy’s sex scene in season 1, which featured Barb dying. But because Mike is rejecting conformity and being authentic, another character lives instead.
I mean, what better way to represent the beauty of the love and intimacy between these two boys? Their love is literally bringing back life to the world.
So yeah, basically I’m saying that Mike and Will expressing their love for each other will save Max.
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This also wouldn’t be the first time that Max’s survival is correlated with their relationship. As I doubt that it was merely a coincidence that in episode 4x04 we have Mike’s genuine monologue to Will, then we have Max surviving Vecna. In contrast to 4x09, which features a forced monologue from Mike to El, followed by Max losing to Vecna and barely surviving.
So, as their bond strengthens, Max’s life bar goes up (so to speak). If something interferes with their bond, Max’s outcome is more dire.
The writers have also been associating Mike/El with death…
[Tumblr only allows a limited number of images so pretend we have one of El holding dead flowers and another image of the cut scene from 3x05 with Mike/El having a moment cutting to a dead body on the hospital floor]
Mike/Will on the other hand have been associated with life. The birds chirping in the background of their final scene together, the flowers blooming between them as they stand together. Plus, blue plus yellow does equal green after all. Which is the most commonly associated colour with life.
🌿🌱🌳
To conclude, I just want to say that I personally think this would be a nice way to end their arc. I know a lot of people are uncomfortable with associating Mike/Will with anything sexual… but the show has been doing this already. Whether you like it or not, Mike and Will have been shown implicitly and explicitly that they desire each other both romantically and sexually. The fact that they have sexual desire for each other does not minimize or trivialize their friendship and love, it’s an aspect of it… adding another dimension to their relationship.
Do I think or hope they would show anything pornographic? Absolutely not (do I even have to say this?) But explicit like Steve/Nancy? Yes. Do I think they’ll be only 14/15 years old when this occurs? No. This will likely happen after a time jump.
Being authentically yourself and not conforming is overall a major theme of the show. I mean it’s called Stranger Things after all. Will people be upset by the ending of this arc? Bylers included? Absolutely. Many people within the town of Hawkins and people watching the show will both show disgust for it. But that’s the point. It’s not “normal” and that’s okay. Different is good, and can be a beautiful and wonderful thing. We all just need to open our minds and hearts a bit. I’m not just talking about the GA; many Bylers are also closed minded and stuck in their ways too. Let’s all try to work on that, shall we?
Despite the opinions of others, Will and Mike will choose to love each other which will inevitably lead to their defeat of Vecna. Love concurs all. It may be cheesy and cliche but personally? I think that’s a beautiful thing. We all can learn to love more.
Anyway, would love to know your thoughts on this.
Then we could be Heroes, just for one day
Part 2 here
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littlewriters-posts · 6 months ago
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Phoenix - Damon Salvatore
Part two of the request I got the other day
part one is here
https://www.tumblr.com/littlewriters-posts/751027674692059136/hey-darling-can-i-request-the-damon-salvatore-x?source=share
Plot: Y/N comes to mystic falls as a foster kid, knowing nothing of the supernatural world. The catch? Y/N lost all her memories, of the past 150 years.
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Stefan had sworn both Elena and Damon to secrecy.
Damon had come storming in, his usual stony expression riddled with worry, interrupting Stefan and Elena, announcing the arrival of his old love - that somehow she had come back to life.
Elena was sceptical at first "Are you sure it's not just another doppelganger curse?" she asked, a frown on her face. The name rang bells in her head but she couldn't quite place why.
Stefan shook his head "No, she told Damon she had the Phoenix curse. Not too unsimilar from your one actually, apparently she when she dies she gets reborn again from the ashes, all memories wiped,"
"Except when she wore that necklace," Damon interjected "If we could just find it, we could get her memories back!"
And she would remember me, went unspoken.
Stefan sucked his teeth slightly. Part of him wanted to dismiss Damon's hope, but the other half recognized that this was the first ounce of humanity Damon had shown in years.
"What did you say her name was again?" Elena asked
"Y/N, L/N," Damon said "Apparently she's now living with your friend, the Bonnie," he raised his eyebrows at her, as if demanding an explanation.
Elena's eyes widened "Oh my god," she muttered to herself before turning back to Stefan "Bonnie said that her Grams had signed the papers to adopt this girl, Bonnie said it came out of nowhere. But then she died, and demanded that Bonnie's dad do it instead,"
"Y/N, from my time anyway, was very close to the Bennet witches," Stefan mused silently.
"Yeah they spent years looking for her, and failing," Damon added
Stefan then turned very serious "Damon if she is Y/N you cannot go near her. Remember she doesn't know you, and you don't want to scare her away,"
"I won't scare her away," Damon said looking mildly offended "I am the eternal stud, everyone loves me,"
Stefan rolled his eyes "We really need to find out if it is her first, or just some weird coincidence,"
"What so she can fall in love with some boring human?" Damon asked snidely.
Elena stood up, looking sympathetically at Damon, which he hated.
"Look she loved you once right? I'm sure she'll love you again," she reassured and Damon scoffed so she continued. "She'll be with Bonnie on Monday, I'll become friends with her first, then we can go from there,"
Damon grumbled, but seemed satisfied with that answer, and disappeared upstairs without another word.
Stefan walked up to Elena, wrapping his arms around her waist.
"As much as I hate to say it, he's not the same person he was when he first met her, and chances are she's exactly the same,"
Elena sighed "We'll see what she's like on Monday,"
Y/N was terrified. Dressed in her flares and green top that Bonnie had kindly bought for her, she faced herself in the mirror.
The thought of being in the same room as people she didn't know made her feel rather sick.
"You'll be fine," Bonnie reassured, leaning on the door "Come on, I'll drive you,"
Y/N nodded, brushing all negative thoughts out of her head as she followed her new friend out of the door.
She tried to focus on Bonnie's voice as she chatted at her, telling her all the school drama as if knowing that would help her fit in more with the rest of the group.
But all she could focus on was the outside world, and how different yet familiar it seemed to her.
"We're here," Bonnie announced "Come on, Elena and Caroline are meeting us inside,"
Y/N nodded, giving the other girl a grateful smile. Bonnie had already told her everything about the two others girls, Elena was the sweet one who's parents died in a car crash, and Caroline was slightly outspoken, but lovely when you got to know her.
Elena hadn't told her friends about Damon's history with the new girl, for some reason it didn't seem right. She didn't want to taint anyone's view of the girl before they met her.
Y/N hid behind Bonnie slightly, as they approached the two girls who were waving excitedly at them.
Caroline was quick to embrace Y/N in a hug "Oh I am so excited you're here! It's about time we got some new people in this town,"
Elena rolled her eyes with a smile "It's nice to meet you," she said
As Elena studied Y/N she couldn't help but think that she was nothing like she imagined. She pictured someone meddlesome, someone stony faced and cold hearted like Damon not - not this.
Elena watched as Y/N gave a shy smile, her head held high but fidgeting fingers giving away her nerves.
She reminded her of a baby deer...or lamb...or maybe an otter. Something vulnerable.
"How are you finding it? Have you ever been to school before?" Caroline asked. Elena smacked her arm
"Caroline!" she exclaimed and Caroline looked sheepish.
"Sorry,"
Y/N shook her head with a smile "It's okay, I don't mind answering questions. I - I actually have amnesia, I don't remember anything until I reached about sixteen? Then I was home-schooled by my foster mom,"
Caroline stared at her with wide eyes "So you've never been to a party?"
Y/N shrugged "I mean I might have done, I just won't remember it,"
"Well you're in luck, the founders ball is soon!" Caroline practically squealed "I won Miss Mystic Falls last year, so I can help pick out your dress!"
Y/N hesitated, the thought of entering the hall with yet more people was giving her heart palpations, but she also wanted to make friends.
"Sure, when?" she asked with a smile
"How about Saturday?" Caroline asked and Y/N looked to Bonnie for help.
"We'll be there," Bonnie reassured and Y/N sighed with relief, at least there would be somebody she knew.
"What class have you got first?" Caroline asked, reading Y/N scheduled over her shoulder "Oh no fair! You'll be with Elena and Bonnie," she sighed dramatically.
"ooo History with Mr Tanner, good luck," Elena said, giving Y/N a smile "He's evil,"
Y/N laughed "Surely he can't be that bad,"
Y/N was wrong.
Not only did Mr Tanner sit her at the back in between a boy called Matt Donavon, he also sat her behind another boy called Stefan Salvatore, who was so tall she had very little hope to see the board in-front of the class.
And then he had the audacity to ask her question's in-front of the entire class.
She was quite sure he face was utterly red, and Stefan turned round to face her, making the redness worse.
"It's okay, he did that to me the first time as well, he's a dick," he reassured and Y/N felt the sudden urge to hide under her desk.
"Thankyou," she whispered, her eyes lowering to her paper and Stefan gave her a soft smile, trying not to show his concern.
If he had any doubts now they were sealed. He only knew one person who looked that panicked when talking to people, and he could recognize that face anywhere.
Unfortunate it meant she was still the same person that she was before, and Damon wasn't.
After history Y/N was grateful to Caroline, who talked her ear off on who was hot and who was not, although she found herself growing weary of the constant chatter and found her gaze wandering across the courtyard.
A large crow caught her eye, as it stared at her unblinkingly.
"We're going to the Grill after school wanna come?" Bonnie asked, cutting Caroline off her rant as she did so.
"I'd love that," Y/N said softly, breaking her gaze from the bird.
"What have you got next?" Elena asked
"Er - maths," Y/N replied, checking her schedule.
"Ah shoot, we've all got Biology," Bonnie said sympathetically
"It's okay, Stefan has maths, he can show you the way!" Elena interjected, smiling at her friend.
Y/N grimaced, as much as she didn't have anything against the boy, she'd take getting lost as appose to having to strike up a conversation with a stranger.
"I don't want to bother him," she said quietly.
Elena shook her head, before waving Stefan over from where he sat on the bench.
"You'll like him, he's quiet like you," Caroline reassured and Bonnie rolled her eyes.
"Ignore her," she said smiling apologetically.
"What did I say?" Caroline frowned, but Y/N smiled.
"It's okay, I get what she meant."
Caroline smiled from ear to ear. She often felt out of place, constantly saying the wrong thing at the wrong time, or saying it the wrong way and getting reprimanded. But Y/N made her feel understood.
"Do you mind walking Y/N to maths?" Elena asked Stefan as he approached.
"Sure," he shrugged "I'll make sure you don't get lost,"
Y/N smiled gratefully, not quite meeting his eyes before waving goodbye to her friends and following alongside him.
"How are you finding your first day?" he asked eventually, noticing her fidgeting hands immediately.
"It's okay, just a lot of people," she shrugged, glancing around at the people shoving past her and she shrank a little.
"Must be overwhelming," he mused thinking slightly "You know there's a graveyard not far from here - sounds dark but I find it's the only place you can really get some peace and quiet,"
Y/N looked up at him, for the first time meeting his eyes. "Thankyou," she said earnestly. "I've only got a half day today, something about adjusting to school life, so I might go after then - where is it?"
"Turn right out of school, go down the road to the old bridge and turn left," Stefan said simply as Y/N hurried to jot it down.
Someone with her sense of direction had to be prepared.
"Great and er - how do I get to the Grill from there?" she asked nervously.
Stefan didn't judge "Follow the middle path into the woods, keep going and then go left at the second turning. Turn right when you get to the old building. Just follow that path and it'll lead you back to the street,"
She thanked him again, feeling slightly relieved that she wouldn't have to navigate it without help, nor would she have to ask a complete stranger.
After Maths, Y/N bid goodbye to the younger Salvatore brother, before texting the girls where she was going, and that she would meet them at the grill later. With Stefan's direction's written down, she was sure she wouldn't get lost, and too her relief she didn't.
So there she sat, next to a random grave, her head resting against the cool stone.
In her hands lay a notebook, the date marked clearly at the top as she jotted her thoughts down.
Her doctor had suggested a diary, after losing your memory for no apparent reason there was no evidence to suggest it wouldn't happen again.
She didn't notice Damon watched her from the shadows, a pained look on his face. He hated the way she looked so tense, her fingers often pulling at the strands of hair that had escaped the messy braid. He could even smell the blood that came from her bitten lips.
But what he hated most was how she was exactly the same. The same slight crease between the brows, the same nervous fidget patten, the same soft hum as she wrote.
It was like she had never changed, like nothing had ever changed her.
He wanted to speak to her, even for a moment but he stopped himself. She hadn't changed, but he had. Even if she did, even if she could, remember him, would she still love him after learning everything he had done? Everyone he had killed?
Would she be able to see past the scars he's obtained and his bloody hands and still be able to see him?
He didn't know. And that killed him.
So there in the shadows he stayed, watching and praying that she would be kept safe.
Y/N shut her book with a sigh, stuffing it back in her bag. She glanced at her phone and saw that it was time to go, surprised that she had been this long.
But it was nice, the quiet, it made her feel whole again.
"Right, to the Grill we go," she muttered, biting her lip slightly.
She slung her bag over her shoulder and started walking down the middle path. She was unaware the Damon was still watching her with the same pained expression.
She came to the turning and abruptly turning, feeling rather pleased with herself as she did so for not getting lost.
As she walked she took out the slip of paper she had jotted the directions down in, and to her absolute horror the ink had smudged.
"Oh no. Oh nononono," she muttered, looking around herself in horror. She remembered something about turning near a building but what building was that?
She turned, telling herself she would just go back the way she came and ask for help, before realising the path she was walking down was a forked path and she couldn't remember which one she had taken.
"Oh crap crap crap," she whispered.
She felt the air around her grow colder, her lungs fighting for air as she tried not to panic. She'd been lost before, she'd be fine. It's not like Mystic Falls was dangerous.
Behind his hiding place, Damon cursed himself. He looked at her panic stricken face, the face he'd seen a thousand times before when she was forced into social situations, and felt his heart tug slightly.
"You lost?"
Y/N whirled around, her eyes wide and heart pounding, before coming face to face with the man she met her first night of Mystic Falls.
"Damon?" she questioned, frowning slightly "What are you doing here?"
He shrugged, walking towards her trying to look as non threatening as possible. "I like it here, it's quiet,"
Y/N relaxed slightly "Stefan said the same thing - you're related aren't you? Same last name and all,"
Damon smirked slightly "Brothers," he responded. "So are you lost?"
Y/N's cheeks reddened slightly, a slight pout on her lower lip "If I say no, will you save me my dignity but help me anyway?"
Damon laughed "So you've got an abysmal sense of direction, it's not the worst thing to be bad at - come on, it's this way,"
"How do you know where I'm going?" she asked
Damon froze for a second before recovering "Stefan's going to the Grill too, I just assumed,"
Y/N shrugged, falling comfortably into step besides him. She couldn't tell what it was, but she felt more at ease with him than anyone she'd met so far at Mystic Falls. Like she already knew him.
"They go out a lot, I don't know how they do it," she mused, covering up a yawn.
Damon eyed her carefully, not wanting to come off like he was staring but also unable to tear his gaze away from her.
"You could just not go?" he offered but she shook her head.
"I can't, I need to go to the Grill anyway to ask about any jobs they've got going there," she sighed "These girls love shopping,"
Damon frowned "Job? Aren't you a little young to have to work? You should be out their partying," he smirked.
Y/N wrinkled her nose "Plenty people my age work Damon, I'm not a child. Besides, I don't have any family money...or any family and once I turn eighteen I don't get any support anymore,"
Damon said nothing at first. Money had never been an issue for him, he was a Salvatore after all, and his powers of persuasion meant he could get anything he wanted if he was smart about it. But she was just playing a human over and over again, with nothing to fall back on.
"Well I'm sure you'll find something," he said finally "Mystic Falls is fully of rich people, which mean nobody wants to work," he said amusedly and Y/N laughed.
"Alright Miss Y/N, you're here," Damon announced waving his hand in-front of his as if she would miss The Grill building right in-front of her.
"Thankyou so much Damon, that's twice you've helped me out now - I can't thank you enough," Y/N said sweetly, smiling up at him.
Damon swore he felt his dead heart stop.
"It's no problem - just do me a favour and don't tell my brother. He doesn't like me much,"
Y/N didn't question it as she waved goodbye to him and stepped into the restaurant to meet her friends.
Damon watched her through the window, still not wanting to tear his eyes away from her. His attention soon diverted to the bar manager coming out the store for his smoke break.
Within a flash Damon was next to him, forcing the man to look him dead in the eye as he did so.
"You are going to accept Y/N L/N into whatever job she wants, with whatever hours she requires and pay her double for working weekends," he said lowly.
Compulsion really was handy.
In the bar, Y/N was laughing with Caroline, the other two not appearing yet.
"So who's your date going to be?" Caroline asked gleefully, "I mean you don't have to have one, but you also kinda do if you want to go for Miss Mystic Falls," she added.
Y/N shrugged "I don't really know anyone Caroline, I'm quite happy just to watch and support you,"
Caroline's features softened slightly "You're so sweet," she gushed "Elena and Bonnie don't really like it, they think it's old fashioned,"
"Well it is," Y/N pointed out "But just because something is traditionally feminine doesn't mean you can't enjoy it,"
Caroline smiled "See this is why I like you, you just get it. So tell me, any cute guys caught your eyes yet?"
Y/N shook her head with a smile "Is that all that goes on through your head?" she asked.
Caroline shrugged "You'd only say that if you were deflecting!" she pointed out "Spill,"
"There isn't! I've met like, three guys since I've been here, one of the is Elena's boyfriend and the other is her ex!"
"So who's the third?" Caroline asked, her eyes widening.
Y/N blinked - she hadn't expected Caroline to catch onto that little detail. She gulped slightly, the feeling of tightness returning to her chest. Damon hadn't wanted Stefan to know about him helping her - and Caroline would surely tell him. But she also didn't want to lie.
"Oh erm...I met him on my first day. I got lost finding Bonnie's house and he helped me,"
Caroline clapped her hands together "Oh my goodness! What did he look like, was he hot? What was his name?"
Y/N laughed slightly, amused by the blonde's actions "I don't know, he was tall, dark hair. Really sweet,"
"Oh I bet it was Tyler! You know he's been staring at you all day," Caroline gushed and Y/N blinked.
"Tyler?" she questioned the name foreign on her tongue.
Caroline nodded "Yeah he's on the football team! A bit of a douche but when he likes you he's just the sweetest,"
Y/N nodded slightly, her gaze shifting round the bar "Does anyone at school work?" she asked nervously and Caroline's gaze shifted into one of sympathy.
"Yeah, Matt actually works here. And Tyler sometimes helps his dad with Mayor stuff,"
Y/N nodded, the gnawing pit in her stomach growing slightly. She hadn't even considered that people would look down on her for having a job before Damon's tone of voice told her otherwise.
"But don't worry, no one will care. A girl called Vicky used to work here, and nobody picked on her for having a job," Caroline reassured
Y/N then spotted the manager who was heading back to the bar. "Oop - there he is - wish me luck!"
"Good luck sweetie, hope you get it!"
As Y/N walked over, she mustered the courage to actually look the man in the eyes as she spoke to him, hoping that forcing herself to make eye contact would help.
"Hi," she gave a small awkward wave "I'm Y/N L/N, I was just wondering if you had any waitressing jobs going,"
The Managers eyes seem to shift a little, before he responded with a great smile on his face "Of course! Someone just left today so we have an opening. We can fit the hours around you, and you get double when you work on weekends,"
"Oh!" exclaimed Y/N, not expecting it to be that easy. In fact she was kind of upset since she had a whole speech written on how she would be a great worker. "Oh great, when can I start?" she asked.
"How about next Wednesday? Wednesdays are the quietist days, so we'll have plenty of time to show you the ropes,"
Y/N tried to hide her excitement "Great - thankyou so much!" she called over her shoulder as she practically raced back to the table.
Bonnie and Elena had arrived, sitting down in the vacant seats.
"Did you get it?" Caroline asked and Y/N nodded happily. The girls applauded her, giving her hugs and for the first time Y/N felt truly in place.
"What you can still come shopping with us right?" Elena asked worriedly and Y/N nodded,
"Yeah he said I start on Wednesday and I can pick my hours," Y/N said, taking a sip of her drink.
"Nice," Elena said approvingly "Well done Y/N,"
Y/N blushed a little "Thank Elena,"
Non of them noticed Damon, sat in the corner facing away from them, a small smile on his face.
Saturday rolled around sooner than Y/N had expected and she found herself slightly dreading it. As much as she loved her friends, they were richer than she was and whilst they would be looking at the prettiest dress, she would be looking at the price tag that came with it.
But as she entered the dress shop with her friends, all thoughts soon vanished as she laughed at Caroline's dramatics.
"I wish we could of found you a date - you would have had such a great shot at winning," Caroline said sadly but Y/N shrugged.
"I'd rather just sit and watch then have to dance with somebody I don't know," she replied.
"Well still...I'm going to try this dress on!" she announced picking up a blue number.
Elena patted Y/N shoulder "Ignore her, it doesn't really matter," she reassured. "Which one should I try on?" she then asked, holding up two almost identical dresses.
"Both of them," Y/N replied simply "We've got all day haven't we - and Bonnie why don't you try that green one over there, you'd look stunning!"
Bonnie smiled, grabbing the green dress to change.
It was then a dress in the corner corner caught Y/N's eye, it was a dusty purple, the slight jewels encrusting the top. It was beautiful.
She glanced at the tag.
Way out of her price range.
"Would you like to try it on?" The shopkeeper asked gently but Y/N shook her head.
"No it's okay, it's way out of my budget anyway,"
The shopkeeper bit her lip, "You can try it on anyways, no harm in a little dress up,"
Y/N looked at her hopefully.
"Really?"
The shopkeeper nodded with a smile and Y/N's smile brightened, as she rushed into the changing room.
The dress fit her perfectly, hugging her figure in all the right places before flaring at the bottom. The colour seemed to make her skin glow.
Too bad it was too expensive.
"Come on, let us see!" Caroline begged and Y/N sighed, opening the curtain and letting the girls squeal over it.
"Oh it fit's you perfectly!" Bonnie remarked "You need to get it,"
Y/N shook her head with a smile "And buy the first dress I try on?" she responded, not wanting to tell them that it was simply too expensive.
"See - she get's it," Caroline said with a laugh "No go change so we can try more stuff on," she pulled the curtain back over her friend.
She sighed, wriggling out of the dress with difficulty before placing it back on the hanger.
She handed it to the shopkeeper with a smile.
"It was beautiful but I just can't afford it," she said sadly.
The shopkeeper nodded understandingly "We have a sale section over there if you'd like?"
Y/N nodded, before spotting Caroline sorting through many dresses in her arms.
"Got enough there Caroline?" she asked amusedly and the blonde sighed in exasperation.
"I just don't know which one to pick, I wore blue when I won last year, but I've already worn blue," she tutted putting the blue dress back on the rails. "You found anything yet?" she asked.
Y/N thought back to the purple dress, but didn't want her friend to pity her.
"No, I might come back another day," she said softly. Or to another cheaper shop she added in her head.
"I'm starving, shall we go to the grill?" Bonnie asked.
"We go there all the time, I'm sick of chips and the smell of beer," Caroline whined. "Can't we go back the the Salvatore house, they always have great snacks,"
Elena hesitated. Her and Stefan were trying everything they could to keep Damon from doing something rash, and that meant trying to keep Y/N away from him.
"I'm actually kind of tired," Elena said, yawning. "Why don't we go to that smoothie place downtown and then we can all go home?"
That seemed to go down well with the rest of the group, and Caroline quickly bought Y/N's smoothie before the other two could notice, and before she could protest.
"Don't worry about it," she brushed off when Y/N tried to pay her back, so the girl just sipped her smoothie in peace.
When Y/N arrived home, she was utterly exhausted from the full day, and was about to collapse on the bed when she noticed a parcel on it.
She frowned, wondering who on earth would have put it there. She's been with the girls all day and Bonnie's dad was away on business.
Perhaps Elena had Stefan drop it off, or maybe Bonnie had snuck in whilst Y/N was downstairs.
She opened the box carefully and gasped.
Inside it was the same dusty purple dress she had tried on in the shop.
She gingerly took it from the box, looking everywhere for some kind of tag to say who it was from but there was nothing.
"Bonnie?" she called uncertainly, not knowing whether or not to be excited about it.
Bonnie came in, fresh out the shower and drying her hair. "You o - oh you bought it!" she gushed remarking at the dress.
But Y/N shook her head.
"No I couldn't afford it, it was just here when I got back,"
Bonnie frowned "Oh...maybe Caroline bought it for you then? You know what she's like,"
"Yeah," Y/N echoed staring at the mystery dress "Do you think I should wear it?"
Bonnie nodded "I mean it would be rude not to, and it is a beautiful dress. Besides what harm could a dress do?"
Y/N shrugged, putting the dress on the hanger and hanging it outside her wardrobe, admiring it in the light, before a tap on the window startled her.
She whirled around, only to see a crow staring at her unblinking through the glass pane.
"Oh shit," Bonnie muttered, her eyes wide "Y/N I'm just gonna make a phone call okay?" she said quickly, before practically running out of the room.
But Y/N attention was on the bird as she opened her window for it.
"You hungry?" she asked and threw the bird a bit of bread. It just stared at her some more, before flying away. She shrugged, closing the window.
Back at the Salvatore household, Elena and Stefan rounded on Damon with narrowed eyes.
"Tell me why Y/N has just received a dress that she didn't buy, but was trying on earlier today?" she asked with raised eyebrows.
Damon scoffed "I don't owe you an explanation," he said snidely.
Elena shook her head "You need to stay away from her Damon, she doesn't remember you. You're just going to end up hurting yourself,"
Damon shook his head "I didn't go near her did I? I bought her a dress that she wanted, and she doesn't even know it was me. Tell her Caroline bought it, she's always doing stuff like that,"
Stefan had so far said nothing, not even when Elena turned to him for backup. Instead he was looking at his brother with a saddened expression.
"It's okay," he finally said with a sigh "I mean, it's not like he's hurting her,"
Elena pursed her lips, not wanting to admit that she simply just didn't trust Damon around her new friend. But she had to admit, she met Damon when he was at his worst, and Y/N originally met him when he was still human.
Damon said nothing, but carried his bottle of bourbon up to his room.
"Maybe they should meet," Stefan said lowly "I mean, he's not going to kill her,"
Elena shook her head "So he can take his pain out on other people when she doesn't fall in love with him? You said so yourself, Damon's a monster - and Y/N just doesn't seem like the type to deal with that,"
Stefan stared into the fire, a thoughtful expression on his face. "What if they met here? That way we could keep an eye on Damon, make sure he doesn't do anything too rash, but at least he wouldn't be secretly trying to see her without us knowing,"
"Okay," Elena nodded, "But after the founder's ball next week, I can only focus on so many things at once,"
Y/N found herself in two minds over the founders ball. On the one hand, it was quite exciting to be getting dressed up and ready with her new found friends, but on the other hand, it was a long day to be around people.
She tried to push that thought out of her mind until Bonnie said,
"We're all having an after party at the Salvatore's, so I'll drive you there after,"
Y/N tried not to show her grimace "Do I need to bring spare clothes?" she asked and Bonnie shrugged.
"I'm pretty sure Caroline will change into another dress, but me and Elena will be going casual so it's up to you,"
Y/N then crammed a skirt and jumper into her bag, with some joggers in case it got too cold.
After Bonnie helped her tie the corset laces on her dress, the sudden restriction of breath was noticeable but not uncomfortable.
"You look stunning," Bonnie reassured, seeing the fleeting look o nerves overtake her friends face. "Now listen, I'm driving but me and Elena and Caroline all have to go upstairs because of the Miss Mystic Falls thingy, but we'll come find you as soon as we can okay?"
Y/N nodded, deciding against speaking for the fear that the nerves would make her be sick. She was nervous, and she didn't even have a part to play.
She was grateful for the three girls as they all chatted in the car, meaning that she didn't have too, and even as they left to go upstairs, Y/N gave them a small smile and wished them good luck.
Now what.
She glanced around the room, feeling suddenly very small as she realised she didn't really know anybody in there. She settled by grabbing a glass of champagne that she knew she wouldn't drink and settling in the corner, watching everyone go by in their dresses.
She watched and clapped as one by one the elected girls descended the stairs, each one getting an applause before moving to the middle of the room.
"That's a beautiful dress," Came a voice, and Y/N jumped slightly, turning towards the sound of the voice. Her demeanour relaxed slightly as she realised who it was.
"Hello Damon," she said, her smile more genuine. "And thankyou, I'm not entirely sure who got it for me, but I love it,"
Damon said nothing, but a small smile played on his lips.
"You don't look to be enjoying yourself," he acknowledged and she sighed.
"I know, I'm just...I hate crowds," she admitted "I'm so glad you're here, finally a face I recognize,"
Damon stared at her a little, the want to let all of his emotions tumble off his tongue was great, but he knew that it would be a disaster if he did so.
"You owe me a favour, Since I have rescued you what - twice now?" he asked teasingly.
Y/N rolled her eyes "Alright Mr Salvatore, what do you want?" she went along playfully.
"A dance," he replied simply, extending his hand and she laughed nervously.
"I'm a terrible dancer, I don't think I've ever even learnt!" she exclaimed but Damon's blue eyes met her wide ones and she relented a little.
"I'll lead you," he replied gently, taking her hand in his own. "Come on,"
Y/N accepted his hand, gracefully walking to the middle where more couples were now dancing with the original girls.
"This is going to be so embarrassing," she muttered, her eyes darting around as she saw that other people were watching her.
"Hey - look at me," Damon commanded, his tone soft. So she did, his blue eyes staring into her own and she felt her breath hitch slightly. There was something ever so familiar about them, like a safeness that she couldn't quite place, like somewhere she had been before but couldn't quite remember.
And they were dancing, in sync and ever so graceful, neither one of them ever breaking eye-contact with each other.
"Oh my god, is that Y/N with Damon?" Caroline ran up to Elena, horrified and Elena nodded with a grimace.
"It's complicated," Elena whispered back to her friend. "We think Y/N used to be an old friend of his - well old girlfriend - back when Damon was human. But she disappeared, and now she's back. And here's the catch - she doesn't remember any of it,"
Caroline's eyes widened "Y/N a vampire?" she whispered in shock but Elena shook her head.
"No she's cursed, every time she dies she get's born back into the same body, with no memory of the life before,"
Caroline looked at Damon, narrowing her eyes "If I didn't hate him so much I'd feel sorry for him - do you think he still loves her?"
Elena nodded with a sigh "Stefan said he never stopped looking for her after she disappeared,"
Bonnie grimaced "Can we please stop feeling sorry for Mr Killer over there, he's literally killed people Elena. We can't let him have Y/N, we both know he's end up hurting her,"
But as the trio watched Y/N and Stefan dance, even Caroline who hated Damon the most, couldn't help but admit the softness in his eyes when he looked at Y/N. Like a humanity that wasn't there before.
"You're an excellent dancer," Damon remarked, pulling her to the side after the song ended.
"I was only following you," she laughed, "Also why do all these drinks have alcohol in, what's wrong with something that actually taste nice," she said bitterly, setting down a champagne glass with a wrinkled nose.
"I'll get you something," Damon reassured "Wait here,"
Y/N didn't have chance to tell him that he didn't have to, he was already gone.
"I do hope my brother wasn't bothering you," Came the voice of Stefan Salvatore as he walked over to her.
She shook her head "No, he's actually really sweet," she said with a soft smile, glancing back to where he had gone too. "He's actually gone to get me drink since I don't like champagne,"
Stefan raised his eyebrows but didn't comment further on the matter, not daring to spoil her image of his brother.
"Where's Elena?" she asked.
"Gone to find her brother I think," Stefan glanced around to spot his girlfriend who was indeed chatting to her little brother. "I'm driving you all to the afterparty now, but I'm coming back for him because there's no room in the car,"
"I thought Bon was driving?" Y/N asked with a frown but Stefan shook his head.
"She's already drinking," he said amusedly
"No worried Brother, I'll take her," Damon had come back, standing besides Y/N and staring at his brother with an emotion Y/N couldn't quite place. "Got you some orange juice," he said, giving her a slightly smile. She thanked him.
Stefan hesitated, not wanting to start a scene, but also not having an excuse ready.
"Alright," he finally said after staring his brother back some more "We're leaving in ten minutes,"
Stefan then left, and Y/N eyed the que to the toilets with distaste. She didn't fancy waiting in the line just to get changed like many of the other girls were.
"Can we go back sooner?" Y/N asked, and Damon turned back to her with a raised eyebrow and a smirk.
"And why would you want that?" he asked and Y/N's cheeks burned.
"No - I didn't mean-" she stuttered slightly before gathering her thought's and frowning at him "I just want to get changed," she said defiantly.
Damon laughed "Relax I'm just messing with you, come on before Stefan think's I'm kidnapping you,"
Y/N rolled her eyes, put picked up her skirts so they wouldn't trail on the floor, before picking up her bags that she had left in the cloakroom. Or tried to, before Damon took them from her.
"And who would I be if I let a lady carry her own bags," he asked, raising his eyebrows.
She curtseyed playfully "Well thankyou Mr Salvatore," she said mockingly, a slight blush blossoming her cheeks.
She didn't understand why, but she felt more comfortable around Damon than anyone else she had met so far, except perhaps Elena, and she had been around him the least.
But there was something utterly familiar about him.
He gave her a cocky grin before opening the car door for her.
"How long are you going to keep up this gentleman act?" she asked as he got in the drivers seat. He put a hand on his chest in mock offense.
"What makes you think it's an act?" he asked, and Y/N laughed, which was quickly followed by a yawn. "You're sure you're up for a party?" he asked.
Y/N nodded, her head resting against the window watching the scenery drive by.
"Thank-you for being so kind to me," she said, glancing at him. His fingers tightened one the wheel slightly.
"You're welcome," was all he said. As she turned away, he tried desperately not to look at her, not to wear his heart on his sleeve like she wore hers.
"Welcome to the Salvatore party," he said when he arrived "Bathrooms down the hall, go right then wa-I'll show you," he said, realising that she would probably get lost.
He then noticed the slight frown on her face "What's wrong," he asked, concerned.
She shook her head "Nothing, It just looks really familiar,"
Damon shrugged "Looks like any old museum I guess,"
She smiled at him as he opened the door to the bathroom, shutting it behind her as she entered.
"Be quick, or I'll miss you too much," he called out and smiled to himself when he heard her laugh.
In the bathroom, Y/N was quick to get dressed, the only problem being she couldn't quite reach the laced up corset and she groaned.
Stepping timidly out of the bathroom she spotted Damon who was leaning against the wall, staring into space.
"Damon?" she asked, and he turned to her with raised eyebrows. "Ca you help untie me please?"
He froze for a second as she lifted her hair, turning her back to him.
His fingers danced carefully over her skin, the temptation to hold her almost overwhelming but he cleared his throat and pushed that thought out of his head.
He carefully undid all the silk ties, letting him fall beneath his fingers. Y/N clasped the front of the dress tightly, so not to let it fall down.
"There you go," Damon said quietly, almost whispering. Y/N turned to him, almost bumping noses with how close they were.
"Thankyou," she replied softly, glancing into his blue eyes as they studied her own, before clearing her throat and returning to the bathroom to get dressed once more.
Damon leant on the wall his hands rubbing his head.
He needed to get a grip he decided.
Y/N changed into the miniskirt that Elena had leant her, with an oversized jumper that barely brushed the bottom of the skirt.
"Okay I'm all ready," she announced and Damon smiled lazily at her.
"About time, the party is about to get started." he said, leading her away and to where numerous people were already standing and Y/N felt herself shrink behind him slightly.
"Y/N!" Elena announced, grabbing her friend by the arm and leading her away from Damon with a glare to the man. Damon watched, biting the urge to follow her down.
Y/N looked back to him, looking slightly regretful and giving him a soft smile, which he raised his glass too.
"So you and Damon?" Bonnie questioned, raising her eyebrows.
Y/N felt her skin burn slightly "He's really sweet," she said quietly
Caroline screwed her nose up "But-Damon seriously? He's such a dick,"
Elena rolled her eyes "Maybe he just really likes Y/N," she said pointedly to Caroline, who pursed her lips slightly.
For the rest of the night the girls kept a close eye on Y/N, not wanting her to see Damon but also not wanting her too suspect anything. However as the night drew on, the girls got more drunk, and Y/N remained sober allowing her to slip away.
It's not that she wanted away from them in particular, but the crowds were getting far too much for her.
So she found herself wandering the halls of the Salvatore building, the vague familiarity of it making her head spin a little. Her fingers ran down the walls as she walked, feeling the old wallpaper beneath her fingers.
She came to the double doors, and something in the back of her mind was begging her to open it, so she did and gasped.
A library.
It was beautiful, with even a seating area near an old fireplace and rows and rows of books.
She marvelled at the sheer amount, before picking a random one and collapsing on the sofa that was there. It didn't take her long to get comfy, curling up against the arm, the book on her lap.
Back at the party, Damon was looking for her, the slight worry settling in his heart.
He cornered Elena, frowning at her "Where's Y/N?" he demanded "I thought you wanted to keep her safe,"
Elena looked around "I thought she went to find you," she said, the worry edging into her voice, barely audible over the slurring of her words as she danced with an empty cup in her hands.
Damon glowered at her, if it was anybody else she would have had her throat ripped out, but he stopped himself.
"Guess I'll go find her," he said sharply.
It was then the thought occurred to him that Y/N said she found the place familiar, and he was sure that apart from in 1864, she had never stepped foot in the building.
And where did she go whenever there was a party?
The library.
He almost laughed when he saw her, curled up against the arm of the sofa, a book in her lap and utterly oblivious to the world around her.
"We were worried about you," he said smoothly, trying to mask the dying worry in his voice.
Y/N looked up with wide eyes, quickly shutting the book and scrambling to her feet. "Oh God I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to intrude. It's just...you have a library in your house," she said weakly, looking embarrassed.
Damon waved her off "You're welcome to use it any time you like, the door is always open,"
Y/N smiled gratefully at him, sitting back down in the seat.
Damon watched as she read, the uncanny similarity between now and when he first met her almost to real to bare. Yet she didn't know him now, just like she didn't know him then.
But maybe she didn't need to remember him, maybe he could get her to fall in love with him a second time.
Y/N shivered slightly, even her thin jumper not quite enough to protect her from the coldness of the large house, especially since the room itself was so big.
Damon eyed her "You look exhausted, want me to take you home?" he asked sincerely.
Y/N shook her head "I can't, Bonnie has the house keys and god knows where she is,"
"You're more than welcome to stay here," Damon said softly and Y/N looked up at him in surprise.
"I wouldn't want to intrude," she declined but Damon shook his head at her.
"It's a boarding house Y/N, we have tons of spare bedrooms for exactly that reason,"
Y/N bit her lip, her eyes downcast as she considered her options. "Only if you're sure," she said finally and Damon resisted the urge to celebrate.
"Come on then sleepy, up to bed," Damon said smirking slightly, helping out of her cozy position on the sofa. She groaned softly as she felt her joints click, but the warmth of Damon's hand in her own made it all worth it.
"Do we have to go through the party?" she whispered as she exited the library.
"God no, Elena would kill me," Damon said mindlessly.
"Why?" Y/N asked curiously and Damon froze, realising what he just said.
"I can be a dick," he responded after a beat. He didn't want to go any further, unsure on what she already knew, and the fear that she would then hate him was evident.
Y/N shrugged "Well, at least you admit it," she said a smile "First step to recovery I guess,"
Damon scoffed "I do not need to recover,"
Y/N bit her lip to stop herself from laughing, which Damon noticed with a slight smile. He opened one of the doors, allowing her to step inside.
"You should find everything you need in here, there's an en-suite so you won't get lost trying to find the bathroom, and there will be some clothes you can sleep in," he said in mischievous tone, a suggestive joke on the tip of his tongue but for some reason he stopped himself before he could say it.
"Thankyou Damon, really," Y/N said sincerely, after marvelling at the room.
Damon nodded at her with a smile, before going to close the door as he left.
"Damon?" Y/N asked, and he popped his head round the door lazily, his blue eyes never leaving hers. "For what it's worth, I like you,"
Damon felt his heart leap into his chest. It wasn't a love confession, he knew that, but she liked him. She wanted to be his friend, and that was a step in the right direction.
"I like you too sleepy, now get some sleep,"
Y/N nodded with a smile, staring at the door as he closed it behind him.
Part of her wanted him to stay, but the other part was content knowing she'd see him in the morning.
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xoluvx · 28 days ago
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forever; b.eilish
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for the past three days you'd woken with a tight feeling in your chest. it was so strong it was impossible to sleep through the night. each night you groaned, reached for your phone, and checked the time. it was always the same. 3am. it was like clockwork now. sleep. wake. repeat. sleep. wake. repeat.
when you finally brought it up to your friends, one had murmured something about the witching hour. it was no coincidence it was the month of october, another had added. not one to believe in the supernatural, you'd just accounted it to a fucked up sleep schedule and stress. it was science at its purest form. it couldn't have possibly been a force, unbeknownst to you, pulling you out of your slumber every night. that was simply impossible.
that is until you started noticing the shadow creeping through your window. it was far away at first. each night getting closer and closer until it was no longer a shadow. It was all in your head. it was just your brain playing tricks on you. it was your friends' stupid words and their need to find a reason for every little thing that happened in your life. whatever this was.. it was something you couldn't explain. you just felt it. you felt it in your bones and chest and neck and every small crevice of your body.
one night. that fateful night. the figure stood right next to your bed. it was so close you could reach out and touch it.. so you did. you reached your arm out. the tip of your index finger brushed down the side of her arm. she was unreasonably cold. she stood there watching the way your chest moved as your breathing grew ragged and your eyes filled with curiosity. not at all frightened.
who was she? why was she here? was she the reason you'd woken up at the exact same time for the past two weeks now. your sleep schedule was completely fucked. feeling a heaviness in your eyes, you dropped your hand and your questions and curiosities and turned your head to the side closing your eyes slowly drifting to sleep.
the sleep you got that night was the best you'd gotten in the past few day. you didn't know she was the reason why. that she was the one who was keeping away the negative thoughts, the bad spirits that had indeed woken you up at 3am like clockwork. she kept those feelings at bay as she sat next to you in bed. as she looked at you with her tantalizing blue eyes. as her hand gently caressed your cheek until you were stirring awake stretching unaware of the figure sitting on your bed.
you just felt a peacefulness in your heart. not like those first few days when you were waking up constantly. no, you felt calm. when your eyelids fluttered opened, you looked at the figure hovering over your body and upon seeing her face everything made sense.
little did you know that you were the key to her lock. the missing piece of her puzzle. she'd seen you cross the street one beautiful autumn morning and all her stars aligned. it was you. you were the one made for her. the one she'd been searching for her entire life. the one that everyone said would one day appear in her life and change everything. what she hadn't expected was for you to be human. you were human and she was a vampire.
it wasn't uncommon for vampires to imprint on a human.. this just complicated things because how was she suppose to explain to you that you were the one she was meant to spend the rest of eternity with? no follow-up explanation or conversation. how was she suppose to make this okay? how could she deprive you of a long happy, normal life? she constantly wondered each night she spent in your room holding your hand and your body like you were the most fragile being.. because in her eyes you were.
she was so careful not to use her full strength even when you begged for it. even when you got on your knees on the mattress and pulled on her jacket whispering the filthiest things on her tongue before letting her take control. always restricting herself. careful. oh so careful.
you wanted every ounce of her just like she craved every ounce of your sweet blood. you were intoxicating. when she fucked you so tenderly in the middle of the night she'd get lost in your scent. her nose pressed to your neck, lips messy on your skin. she needed you. she wanted you. she couldn't live without you.
'turn me.' you muttered as your bodies moved in sync. as you breathed heavily. as you practically moaned the words. she simply froze. she couldn't possibly. she'd never accept your offers or listen to your pleas.
'please' you begged as she cradled the back of your head. lips parting. mouth wrapping around your neck. her fangs sharp. she was hardly touching you. hardly breaking skin and you were holding her tight. you were wrapping your hands tight around her arms. you wanted her just as bad if not more. you knew she'd live forever, your life was just temporary. you wanted forever and you wanted forever with her.
diaween 2024 💜
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edenesth · 6 months ago
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TWTHH Spinoff: Love to Hate You [2]
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Pairing: royal secretary!San x female scholar!reader
AU: historical au (Joseon era)
Word Count: 10.7k 🤡
Summary: San prided himself on his knack for building easy connections with women, viewing himself as a trusted ally for the opposite gender. Thanks to his deep bonds with his mother and sister, he possessed keen insights into the female mindset. Never did he imagine facing the ire of a woman, until he encountered a resolute female scholar with a strong dislike towards men.
A/N: I'd recommend listening to Laufey's Valentine while reading this, the song is quite perfect for this spinoff.
Part 1 | Main Story | Spinoff Masterlist
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"Now, tell me, why were you crying?" you inquired, halting at the doorway of your house, careful to shield your mother from the conversation. You understood that she would only blame herself if she knew he was upset, despite none of it being her fault. Deep down, you knew she carried the burden of not being able to protect her children, always feeling like an inadequate mother.
Siwoo shook his head, "It's nothing, noona. I just... I was just overwhelmed with all the schoolwork on my first day. But don't worry about me, I feel much better after letting it all out," he reassured, attempting to alleviate your concerns. Yet, you couldn't fully accept his explanation. While a part of you ached to think he might have been bullied by his classmates, as you had feared, another part of you swelled with pride at his resilience.
That's my boy.
"Is that so? Well, come on then, dinner might be ready," you responded, and he brightened at the mention of food. "Dinner sounds good, I'm starving! Mother, we're home!" he called out excitedly, darting into your modest abode almost immediately.
"How was school, Siwoo?" your mother asked, her fingers smoothing down his unruly hair as he dug into his meal with gusto. Siwoo grinned and nodded. "It was okay! Master Lee looked after me really well, just like noona said he would!" Your mother smiled warmly and wiped a stray bit of food from his cheek. "That's good to hear."
You couldn't help but smile at their exchange, though you sensed Siwoo's words were meant to reassure your mother more than convey his true feelings. While Master Lee might have looked after him in their presence, you knew all too well the dynamics of school life and the possibility of bullying when no adults were around. Unfortunately, he would have to learn to navigate those challenges, just as you had.
Finishing your meal, you tousled your brother's hair. "So, what did that man from earlier say to you?" Your mother raised a curious eyebrow. "Man? What man?" Siwoo perked up. "Oh, that kind hyung-nim! He was just making sure I was okay."
You scoffed. "Kind? You don't even know him. People can seem nice but have hidden motives. Don't trust too easily, or he might want something from you." Turning to your mother, you elaborated, "It's His Majesty's royal secretary. We had an unpleasant encounter at the palace. I had hoped never to see him again, but somehow he was at Siwoo's school when I went to pick him up. How many coincidences can there be? I'm certain he's up to something. So, you," you directed a stern look at your brother. "Don't entertain him if he shows up again, okay?"
Siwoo nodded reluctantly, his expression turning sullen. Your mother shook her head. "Or perhaps he's genuinely nice...? He's an important figure, after all. You shouldn't make an enemy out of him, dear. I worry for you." You offered her a reassuring smile. "I'll handle it, mother. Don't worry about me."
Later that night, as you lay in bed, the soft breathing of your brother beside you with a comforting rhythm, you couldn't help but feel a pang of bittersweet emotion. Siwoo, once the tiny bundle you cradled in your arms, had grown so quickly before your eyes. Memories of his infancy flooded your mind, the moments when you'd rocked him to sleep and comforted his tears.
Now, here he was, trying to shield his own emotions from you, not wanting to burden you with his struggles. Your heart swelled with both pride and a tinge of sadness as you gently stroked his head, leaning in to plant a tender kiss on his forehead. How you wished he could remain your precious little brother forever, sheltered from life's harsh realities.
Yet, another part of you longed for him to mature, to become the pillar of strength this family needed. You yearned for the day when he would stand beside you as a protector, capable of shouldering the burdens that weighed heavily on your shoulders.
"Sweet dreams, little one," you whispered softly, your voice barely a whisper in the darkness. With a sigh, you closed your eyes, letting the tranquillity of the night envelop you as you drifted into slumber, your dreams filled with hopes for the future.
The next day unfolded much like the one before, with the familiar routine of dropping Siwoo off at school. Kneeling beside him, you tenderly adjusted his hanbok and smoothed down his hair, your actions a comforting ritual between siblings.
"Well, I have no new advice for you today, except to stay strong and not let the words of others affect you. Remember, they're just words, and you can choose not to let them bother you," you imparted, noticing the flicker of surprise in his eyes, as if he had been caught keeping secrets from you. With a warm smile, you gently pinched his cheeks to alleviate any worries he might have.
"Now, go on and get in there. And no causing trouble!" you teased, prompting a playful protest from Siwoo as he swatted your hands away and stuck out his tongue. "Bye, noona! See you later!" he called out cheerfully as he headed off to join his classmates.
As you watched him go, a soft smile lingered on your lips, filled with both pride and a touch of wistfulness.
He'll be fine; we've been over this.
You proceeded towards your educational institution to resume your own studies, putting aside worries about your brother for the moment. As you arrived at the entrance, you took a deep breath to ready yourself before entering, clutching your books tightly to your chest.
"Well, well, look who decided to grace us with her presence. Miss Smarty Pants finally showed up. Heard she even resorted to borrowing books from the royal library," Namgil, the scholar with the wealthiest father and your longtime tormentor, remarked as he annoyingly strolled alongside you, trailed by his group of cronies. One of them chimed in with a smirk, "Poor thing can't even afford her own books. Maybe if she catches the eye of some high-ranking officials in the palace, she won't need to study so hard at all."
Maintaining a neutral expression, you continued walking towards the foyer, where you could begin your studies undisturbed with the presence of teachers. Despite the taunting remarks being a regular occurrence during your journey from the outside to the inside of the institution, you had grown accustomed to them.
Reaching the foyer, you pivoted to face the group with a wide, sarcastic grin. "Well, boys, have you had your fill? If we're done wasting precious time trying to bring others down to boost our own fragile egos, maybe we should focus on our studies. After all, if we want to avoid squandering dear old daddy's money, we'll need to graduate. Time's ticking, gentlemen. Are we going to remain stuck in this childish behaviour forever?"
The satisfaction was palpable as you flashed a victorious smile and turned to stride into the foyer, leaving them no room for a rebuttal as a teacher emerged to greet the group. They hastily composed themselves, offering respectful bows and pretending as though nothing had happened.
Fools, you thought to yourself. This was precisely why you harboured such disdain for men. They were simplistic creatures, falling into one of two categories. The first, like Namgil and his cronies, were openly mean-spirited, condescending, and misogynistic. The second, exemplified by Royal Secretary Choi, was the cunning, duplicitous types who sought to earn your trust through false kindness before exploiting you. In the end, they were all cut from the same cloth.
At the end of the session, following a quiz intended to assess everyone's preparedness for the final examination, you unsurprisingly emerged as the top scorer once again. The teacher's announcement was met with the usual mixture of reactions, but your attention was drawn to his subsequent remarks.
"Miss Moon, once again, you've secured the top spot. Namgil, while second place may seem like an achievement, you should feel nothing but shame. All of you should. It's unacceptable to be outperformed by a woman. Study harder; I expect to see a different outcome in the next quiz."
You shook your head in disbelief at the teacher's words, seething inwardly at his ingrained bias. The implication that a woman should not surpass men in intellect spoke volumes about his archaic mentality. You were tired of being spoken about as if you weren't in the room, tired of the inherent sexism that permeated every aspect of your academic life. Graduation couldn't come soon enough; you were determined to prove these narrow-minded individuals wrong.
I'll show you morons.
"Oh boy, I know that look," Haneul remarked, shaking her head with a disapproving sigh as San emerged from his room the next day. Despite the dark circles under his eyes, his usual enthusiasm and determination shone through. She suspected her discouraging words from the previous evening had backfired, knowing her brother was just an optimistic idiot like that.
He scoffed, "What do you know? Go home already, noona. Your husband might start to worry if you keep visiting so often."
With a smirk, she lightly whacked him on the head. "I'm leaving today, don't you worry. But don't say I didn't warn you when whatever silly plan you might have ends up falling through. You men just love learning things the hard way, don't you? Let her be, Sannie."
"Yeah, yeah. Safe travels. I'll catch you later."
Haneul rolled her eyes in defeat. "Fine, fine. Send me away like I'm a nuisance. You should learn something from little Siwoo."
Turning back with a sarcastic grin, the royal secretary teased, "If you say so... love you, noona!" and blew her exaggerated kisses, earning a mockingly disgusted reaction. "Yuck! Save that for your future wife, gross!" she exclaimed, pretending to gag.
San strode through the palace corridors with newfound determination, his mind buzzing with plans and possibilities. He greeted the palace staff with a bright smile and a confident demeanour, earning curious glances from those he passed.
As he approached the royal study, he couldn't help but feel a surge of excitement. Today was the day he would begin executing his plan, the day he would show Scholar Moon that he was different from the rest, that he was sincere in his intentions.
Entering the king's presence, San found himself greeted with the warm smile of His Majesty. The elderly man's eyes twinkled with amusement as he observed his secretary's energy.
"You seem quite cheerful today, Royal Secretary Choi. Anything exciting happening in your life?" the king inquired with a chuckle as their daily meeting concluded.
San's grin widened, his heart racing with anticipation. "I suppose so, Your Majesty. I won't say more until I see positive results," he replied cryptically, unknowingly leaving the king to interpret his words as he wished. Little did the fool know, his vague response led His Majesty to believe he was referring to romantic pursuits.
The king's face lit up. "Oh, I can't wait to hear the good news. Best of luck, my boy. That's all for today. Carry on with your tasks," he said with a playful wink, dismissing San with a clap of his hands.
Secretary Choi bowed deeply, feeling grateful. "Thank you, Your Majesty!" he exclaimed before leaving the royal study, his mind already buzzing with plans to win over the female scholar.
He made his way through the library, exchanging nods with a few scholars absorbed in their studies. As he searched the aisles, hope waned with each passing moment. Nearly ready to give up, he reluctantly admitted to himself that you might not be there today. With a resigned sigh, he turned to leave.
But as he moved to exit, a flash of movement caught his eye. Turning back, he was stunned to see you tucked away in a quiet corner, fast asleep amidst a pile of borrowed books. A wave of tenderness washed over him at the sight of your peaceful form, and he approached you with silent steps, not wanting to disturb your rest.
He couldn't resist the urge to approach and observe you, struck by how serene and angelic you appeared in your slumber, a stark contrast to your usual tough and guarded demeanour. Seeing the sunlight streaming in from the nearby window and casting a glare on your face, he settled into the seat opposite you. With a gentle touch, he lifted his hand to shield you from the brightness, intent on preserving your peaceful rest.
Looking down at you like this, perhaps it was his innate sense of chivalry, but it stirred an intense urge to protect you, to help shoulder some of the burdens you must be carrying on those delicate shoulders of yours. He couldn't shake the feeling of admiration mingled with empathy as he watched you, lost in tranquil slumber amidst the chaos of the world around you. With a soft sigh, he longed to offer you more than just protection from the sun's glare, yearning to provide solace and support in any way possible.
As he watched you stir, letting out a small groan before readjusting your head and settling back into sleep, he felt a slight panic. However, his worry melted away when he realised you were merely shifting in your slumber. A soft sigh escaped him, accompanied by a gentle smile and a flutter in his heart at how endearing you looked.
Gosh, she looks adorable.
Resting his head on his palm, he continued to observe, noting the subtle signs of exhaustion etched across your beautiful face. Unlike other girls or women who likely had access to luxurious skincare products or ample rest to maintain their beauty, it was evident that any resources you had were dedicated to supporting your family and pursuing your studies. His gaze drifted to your hands, noticing the dry skin, blunt nails and paper cuts, evidence of both physical labour and tireless studying.
Gazing at you, his mind wandered to the challenges and hardships you must have faced throughout your childhood, shaping you into the resilient and guarded person you are today. He pondered on the beliefs you held about men, likely influenced by your past experiences. Working in the palace, San was all too familiar with the despicable behaviour of some men, having witnessed their deceit and manipulation firsthand. He understood, perhaps more than most, your strong aversion and distrust of men.
Yet, in his heart, he believed that you hadn't met men like him and his friends—men of integrity and genuine kindness. Determined to prove to you that good men existed, he resolved to show you through his actions. He was determined to be the exception, to demonstrate that not all men were as duplicitous as those you had encountered before. And in that moment, as he watched over you, he silently vowed to be the beacon of goodness and sincerity that you deserved.
Lost in his contemplations, he was jolted back to reality when he felt your hand push his away. Startled, he blinked, realising that the sun he had been shielding you from was now obscured by clouds. Your voice, sharp and incredulous, pierced through his thoughts.
"What in the world do you think you're doing, Royal Secretary Choi?" you demanded, your tone laced with annoyance and curiosity.
Flustered and caught off guard by your abrupt interruption, San quickly cleared his throat and straightened in his seat, feeling the weight of your scrutiny upon him. He could only imagine how his actions must have appeared from your perspective: waking up to find an uninvited man seated across from you, hand raised in an attempt to shield you from the absent sun.
"I-I can explain," he stammered, scrambling to find the right words to justify his actions. "I was just trying to—"
But before he could finish his sentence, you cut him off with a sarcastic smile, your words dripping with disdain.
"Let me guess," you said, your tone biting. "You just wanted to help? I thought I made myself very clear yesterday, but it seems I might not have. In case you missed the point, I'll repeat it again: I don't need your help. Thank you very much."
With that, you gathered all the books in your arms and swiftly exited, leaving him feeling chastised and uncertain of how to proceed.
As he sat frozen in his seat, watching your retreating figure, the royal secretary couldn't help but admire your firm resolve. Instead of feeling discouraged by your rejection, he found himself respecting you even more for it. Your unwavering stance showed him that you weren't one to let someone into your life easily, and in a world where men could be deceitful and manipulative, that was a reassuring trait. He couldn't help but feel a surge of admiration for you, even as he remained seated in the library, contemplating his next move.
Making your way out of the palace, your heart still raced from the encounter in the library as you clutched the stack of borrowed books close to your chest. Unbeknownst to Secretary Choi, you had been awake for some time, waiting to see what he would do, ready to catch him red-handed if he attempted anything untoward.
To your unpleasant surprise, you found that the glaring sun that had once been on your face was gone. Peeking through your lashes, you observed San going to great lengths to shield you from the brightness, even though he must have assumed you were still asleep. It was a small gesture, but one that spoke volumes about his character.
Even with his apparent kindness, you couldn't bring yourself to believe that he had done it without any ulterior motives. There had to be something he wanted from you; you were sure of it. You refused to let your guard down, you remained determined to stay wary of his intentions.
Despite your hopes that San would quit his efforts after the incident in the library, he proved to be annoyingly persistent. However, to your surprise, he no longer offered unsolicited help, seemingly aware that you had not asked for it. Instead, he chose a different approach to get closer to you.
Every day as you entered the palace, he greeted you with a bright smile and a friendly "good morning." You found his amiable demeanour irritating because it made it challenging for you to be rude to him when he was simply being a nice and sociable person. With no choice but to reciprocate his greetings, you returned them with a forced smile of your own, not wanting to appear impolite in front of other palace staff.
Today was no different, much to your dismay. Despite your multiple attempts to arrive either earlier or later than your usual time, he always seemed to be there. Deep down, you wanted to bluntly ask him if he had nothing better to do. Shouldn't a royal secretary be busy? Why was he always lingering around?
Approaching the entrance and spotting him, you couldn't help but slap a hand on your forehead in frustration. You tried to turn away, but he called out to you before you could make your escape.
"Scholar Moon! I see you're here early today. Good morning!" he exclaimed cheerfully.
You cursed under your breath and reluctantly turned back to feign a smile, bowing respectfully. "Indeed, I am... Good morning, Royal Secretary Choi," you replied through gritted teeth.
He beamed at you and gestured for you to join him. "Come, let us head in together!"
Letting out a sigh of disbelief, you put on your best fake smile and complied, knowing it wouldn't be in your best interest to be rude to someone of such high importance in front of other people. Damn it, you couldn't wait for the day to be over already.
Walking beside him, you sought a moment of tranquillity, but as expected, he initiated an unwanted conversation like always.
"How's Siwoo adjusting to school?" he asked, his tone overly chipper.
Suppressing the urge to roll your eyes, you briefly squeezed them shut before replying, "He's doing well. Thank you for asking."
His smile widened at your response. "That's great! I just hope he's feeling better than the last time I saw him. Poor boy was so upset."
You sighed, cutting him off before he could continue. "Yes, but he'll live—"
Before you could finish, a group of rushing court ladies surged around the corner. "Out of the way! Concubine Eom Heebin is giving birth!" Amidst the commotion, you were shoved aside, but a firm pair of arms caught you, guiding you to safety—San's arms.
You landed against his chest with a huff, and he peered down at you with wide eyes. "Careful there, watch your step! You alright?" His words lacked their usual formality, driven purely by instinct.
San gulped audibly, his gaze lingering on your features as if trying to memorise every detail. He marvelled at how beautiful you looked up close, relishing the sensation of holding you tightly against him. It felt strangely satisfying to shield you from danger, to have you vulnerable in his arms. There was an inexplicable desire within him to be the only one who knew how it felt to hold you like this.
Meanwhile, you felt a conflicting array of emotions swirling within you as you found yourself in his embrace. Despite your best efforts to maintain your dislike for him, you couldn't deny the unexpected sense of safety and comfort you felt in his arms. It unsettled you, this lack of disgust, and you hated how nice it felt, how it threatened to unravel the walls you had carefully constructed around your heart.
Realising your proximity, you blinked rapidly and pushed yourself away. "Y-yes, I'm fine. Thank you..." For once, you meant it.
Days passed, and you found yourself in a state of inner conflict whenever you were around him. Previously, you had to force yourself to maintain politeness and hide your disdain for him, but now, it was becoming increasingly difficult to be unpleasant.
You despised this newfound feeling of guilt he stirred within you, as if he was silently reproaching you for your past behaviour. Moreover, he continued to prove himself to be just as kind as everyone claimed, further complicating your emotions.
Hate brewed within you—not for the royal secretary as a person, but for the way he was challenging your beliefs about all men being alike. He made you start to doubt the certainties you once held dear, and you resented him for it. Most of all, you detested how he was making it difficult for you to maintain your animosity towards him.
Regardless of the swirling new emotions within you, one thing remained constant: your determination to avoid him at all costs. You were sick and tired of the conflicting feelings he stirred within you, and you knew that indulging in them would only serve as a distraction from your studies.
You needed to maintain your focus and drive, especially now when your responsibilities weighed heavily on your shoulders. The last thing you needed was to be sidetracked by unnecessary emotions brought about by a man, of all things.
But of course, life seemed determined to defy your efforts. Despite your best attempts to avoid him, it felt like he was everywhere you turned. With each passing day, you found yourself encountering him more frequently, almost as if he were purposely crossing your path.
The realisation was hard to swallow: you were seeing him more often than your own mother and younger brother combined. It was infuriating to admit, but no matter how hard you tried to evade him, he seemed to find a way to appear wherever you were.
As you finished up your studies and prepared to leave the palace, a sense of relief washed over you. Today had been the first in what felt like an eternity without a sighting of Royal Secretary Choi. Hope flickered in your heart as you packed up your belongings, eager to leave the palace behind and reunite with your little brother.
But just as you approached the main entrance, the sky darkened ominously. Thunder rumbled, and lightning streaked across the sky before a torrential downpour engulfed the area. "No, no, no, not now! Oh, you've got to be kidding me!" you muttered under your breath, feeling frustration bubbling up inside you.
With no umbrella to shield you from the rain, you hurried to seek refuge under the closest shelter you could find: the awning of a nearby building. The sudden change in weather dashed your hopes of a smooth departure, leaving you stranded and drenched.
The thought of Siwoo waiting for you added to your unease. You cursed your lack of preparation, knowing that he would now have to endure more time with his bullies. It was another setback in a day that had promised to be free of Choi San's presence.
Yep, I'm convinced god hates me.
While you sheltered under the awning, your gaze remained fixed on the entrance, torn between the desire to run out into the rain to your brother and the realisation that falling sick was not an option. Too many people depended on you—your mother, your brother, and all the women in need of your assistance. You couldn't afford to be unwell, not with so many responsibilities resting on your shoulders.
Lost in your thoughts, you failed to notice a figure approaching from behind until the raindrops abruptly ceased falling around you. Looking up, you were met with the sight of an umbrella being held over your head. Startled, you turned to see San standing beside you, concern etched on his features.
"Are you alright, my lady? Please allow me to escort you to your destination," he said, his voice gentle and sincere.
The royal secretary's surprise was evident when he realised it was you, causing him to stumble over his words in an attempt to explain himself. "O-oh! It's you, Scholar Moon! I swear I didn't realise it was you, I thought you were a palace staff or someone else! I mean, I wasn't trying to offer help when you didn't want it, or maybe I was..."
He paused, then continued, "But I promise, I'm not making any assumptions! I can leave if you want me to... I'll leave the umbrella with you, of course, because obviously little Siwoo is waiting for you. Sorry, I don't mean to ramble... I just— here you go." Without waiting for your response, he thrust the umbrella into your hand and hurried off into the rain, leaving you standing frozen in bewilderment, trying to comprehend the unexpected encounter.
As you stood there, still holding the umbrella he had left behind, you couldn't shake off the words he had said. They lingered in your mind, his voice echoing gently, making you question your own feelings. For the first time, you understood why women might find him charming. Despite your resolve to dislike him, you couldn't deny his physical attractiveness and his gentlemanly nature.
But as you thought about it further, a new emotion crept in—an unsettling realisation that his kindness wasn't reserved for you alone. He would be just as sincere and helpful to anyone in need. Suddenly, a twinge of jealousy stirred within you. Why did it bother you that he treated others with kindness? Why did you feel upset that you weren't the only one receiving his attention? What was wrong with you?
Confusion clouded your thoughts as you grappled with these unfamiliar feelings. You couldn't understand why it mattered to you whether he was nice to everyone or not. But the fact that it did matter left you feeling even more bewildered. What were these emotions, and why the hell were they stirring within you now?
Lord, I must be out of my damn mind.
In the days that followed, your annoyance with San returned, but this time it was for a new reason—one you stubbornly refused to acknowledge. Despite your efforts to keep your distance and maintain your walls around him, you found it increasingly difficult to do so. His presence seemed to linger in your mind, his gentle demeanour and persistent kindness chipping away at your defences.
Meanwhile, the royal secretary remained hopeful after his recent encounters with you. He noticed the subtle changes in your behaviour—the once sarcastic smiles and curt words slowly giving way to genuine attempts to interact with him. He knew your pride was likely the barrier keeping you from fully opening up to him, but he was determined to break through it.
Perhaps it was the sense of accomplishment he felt, but he found himself increasingly consumed by thoughts of you and the challenge of breaking down your barriers to earn your trust. Each day, he eagerly anticipated going to work, knowing he might catch a glimpse of your beautiful face. Lately, he noticed it revealing more than just anger and disdain—it showed hints of other emotions too. He longed to witness them all, to be the first and perhaps the only one to see them. He felt a swell of pride, both in himself and in your progress, even if you were unaware of it.
"You like her, don't you?" San's gaze snapped up to meet his mother's, his chewing momentarily halted as he raised a questioning brow. "What are you talking about, eomma?"
She grinned, gesturing towards the additional lunch box he had instructed the servants to prepare for work that day. "Oh, you mean Scholar Moon? I mean, yeah, I guess I do...? I like everyone," he responded with a cheerful beam. However, her expression shifted to one of knowingness as she crossed her arms over her chest. "That's not what I mean, you silly boy. You have feelings for her, don't you?"
He choked on his food in surprise at her assertion. "Huh? Wh-what makes you say that? You know about my mission to prove her prejudice wrong, that's all there is to it. I don't feel any differently about her than I do about any other lady."
With a knowing smirk, the elderly woman caused him to wince. It was the same sarcastic expression his sister always wore before delivering a harsh truth. "Oh yes, because you make a point to greet every female palace staff member every morning, ask about all their family members, never stop talking about them, and ensure to pack extra lunch for them all just like you do for Scholar Moon, isn't that right?"
As his mother's words settled in, a sudden revelation struck San like a bolt of lightning. It was as if a veil had been lifted, revealing a truth that had been hidden from him until now. He couldn't pinpoint exactly when it had begun—perhaps it had lurked beneath the surface from the start, waiting for the right moment to surface.
He had been so preoccupied with proving to you that he was different, so focused on challenging your prejudices, that he hadn't stopped to consider his own feelings. What had started as a mission might have morphed into something more. The concern and care he felt for you went beyond mere kindness; it was a genuine desire to protect and support you.
Reflecting on the moments when you had occupied his thoughts—the incident in the library, the near-accident with the court ladies—he realised that his feelings ran deeper than he had admitted to himself. Even as he grappled with the conflict between wanting to take care of you and respecting your independence, he couldn't ignore the truth any longer. Choi San was a man with a lot of love to give, and he wasn't shy or ashamed to admit that he had developed feelings for you—feelings that transcended friendship or admiration. It was a realisation that both surprised and invigorated him, filling him with anticipation for what the future might hold.
But he wasn't stupid; he understood that acknowledging his feelings didn't equate to knowing yours or if you could ever reciprocate them. Despite this, he chose to find contentment in this understanding. He wouldn't expect anything from you in return. Your happiness would suffice to make him happy, even if it meant remaining mere acquaintances.
With this resolve, he bid his parents farewell before heading to work, his heart fluttering at the prospect of seeing you once more.
Later that afternoon, San strolled around the area where you often spent your lunch breaks. Spotting you in the secluded pavilion near the royal library, he felt a wave of relief wash over him. Instead of your usual packed lunch, you were nibbling on a meagre steamed bun. Approaching you with a grin, he greeted you.
"Good afternoon, Scholar Moon. I see you're having lunch as well," he greeted, and you nodded quickly, feeling self-conscious and embarrassed about your modest meal. Just as you were about to ask him what he wanted, he revealed the bag of lunchboxes he had been hiding behind his back.
"That's wonderful then. My family estate kitchen staff seemed to have made an extra set of lunch, and I was just wondering if maybe you would like to have it," he offered. You raised a sceptical eyebrow. "An extra set? That seems highly unlikely to happen."
He tried to maintain his composure despite being caught in a fib. "Fine. If you're not interested in it, I'm sure there are other palace staff who would enjoy it," he said, turning to leave. Panic surged within you as he started to walk away. "W-wait! I'll take it... please," you pleaded, reaching out to grasp his arm. With a satisfied nod, he settled down beside you.
That's what I thought.
As you opened the meticulously prepared lunchbox, a look of awe graced your features. The royal secretary chuckled at your adorable expression. He observed as you hesitated for a moment, glancing at him as if seeking approval before starting to eat. With a nod of encouragement, he joined in.
Little did you know, he had overheard some court ladies discussing the struggles faced by a female scholar, which could only be you, as you were the only one known. They recounted your struggles to afford essentials at home due to your brother's school fees and your own lack of income, all because of your dedication to your studies.
As you both began to eat, you didn't notice San biting his lip to hold back his laughter. Your eyes had widened and sparkled with innocent amazement at the flavours, a look he had never seen before. The sight made his heart flutter, confirming his feelings for you. He wanted to protect that innocence forever and be the only one to witness this endearing sight. He could easily picture spending time with you like this for life, and he knew he wouldn’t complain.
When you looked up and caught him staring, he quickly returned his gaze to his food. You blushed and checked your lips for any stray rice, wondering why he had been looking at you like that. Like a creep.
How annoying.
Relieved that there was nothing on your face, you continued eating. However, you furrowed your brows as you noticed the secretary picking at his food from the corner of your eye. Unable to contain your curiosity, you turned to see him pushing aside all the greens in his container. Raising an eyebrow, you asked, "Saving the best for last?"
He chortled, "Like hell I am."
Realising what was going on, you scoffed, "Seriously? The great Royal Secretary Choi doesn't eat his vegetables? Even my brother eats his. You should be ashamed of yourself."
He sputtered, clearly embarrassed, and you snickered at how flustered he appeared over your teasing. Glaring at you, he retorted, "Is that any way to talk to the kind samaritan who just treated you to lunch?"
You shrugged. "I'll treat anyone who doesn't eat their veggies the same way, with discrimination. If you won't eat them, give them here, you big baby."
He pouted, about to hand them over until you added, "Siwoo's going to be so disappointed when he hears about this. He looks up to you and thinks of you as his role model, you know." You gasped, realising you had revealed something you hadn't meant to share, but all your regret dissolved when you saw his reaction to your words.
San's jaw dropped, and he quickly snatched the greens back, stuffing his face with them. "There, I finished them. You happy now?!"
You couldn't help but burst into laughter. In moments like this, you wondered how wonderful it would be if all men were like him. You admired how his eyes crinkled as he joined in your laughter. He could be so annoyingly cute and likeable. Gosh, you hated it. You hated how warm he was making you feel, hated how good it felt.
As the two of you calmed down from your giggles, the smiles remained on your faces. You finished the last of your food, neatly wrapped the lunchbox back up in his bag, and handed it to him. "Thank you, Royal Secretary Choi," you said, your voice sincere.
His heart skipped a beat at your genuine gratitude. With a nod of acknowledgement, he reached out to take the bag from you. Both your breaths hitched when your fingertips brushed against each other. The unexpected contact sent a small, electric jolt through you both, causing you to momentarily lock eyes.
San's eyes softened, filled with an emotion you couldn't quite place. The world seemed to pause, and for a fleeting moment, the two of you were the only ones that existed. You could feel your pulse quickening, the warmth of his touch lingering on your skin.
"You're welcome," he finally replied, his voice barely above a whisper. He took the bag, his fingers lingering a moment longer than necessary before pulling away.
You quickly looked down, trying to steady your racing heart. "I should get back to my studies," you said, standing up and smoothing out your clothes.
"Of course," he replied, standing up as well. "Take care, Scholar Moon."
With a final nod, you turned and walked away, feeling his gaze linger on your back. A small smile tugged at your lips as you wondered what it would be like if moments like these with him became a regular part of your life. You found your own thoughts baffling, as no man had ever made you feel such emotions before.
Could he possibly... be the only exception?
No, he could not.
You should have known better. Should have recognised the trouble he brought along despite his constant insistence on helping. Initially, you felt grateful for his frequent gestures, like bringing you lunch and accompanying you to pick up your brother from school during the rainy season, the three of you huddled under his umbrella—a sight that warmed your mother's heart.
For a while, it felt like being on Cloud 9. But in hindsight, you must have lost your mind to let him get so involved in your life. It seemed foolish to rely on him so much, to let him become so close to you and your family.
And inevitably, there were consequences.
You reached your breaking point when the bullying at your educational institution intensified. Rumours about you and the royal secretary spending time together spread like wildfire among your fellow scholars, leading to endless torment.
As you tried to leave the institution, hoping to find solace at home after enduring what felt like hours of torment, Namgil and his cronies blocked your path, their mocking laughter echoing around you like a cacophony of cruelty.
"Leaving so soon, Miss Smarty Pants? Off to see your beloved Royal Secretary Choi, I presume?" he jeered, his voice dripping with malice. "Who would've thought your success was all thanks to him? Must have made quite the deal to get him to treat you so well. Bet you're not so innocent anymore, huh?"
His words cut through you like knives, causing your steps to falter as you froze in place, the implications of his cruel insinuations hitting you like a ton of bricks. "Should've known," Namgil continued, his tone laced with venom. "All you women are good for is spreading your legs."
You felt a wave of humiliation wash over you, a burning rage rising up within you as you struggled to hold back tears. They had no idea what you had been through, the sacrifices you had made to get to where you were. But at that moment, all you could do was stand there, feeling utterly defenceless against their relentless cruelty.
Meanwhile, San couldn't shake off his growing concern for you. He hadn't caught sight of you all day, and his inquiries around the palace yielded no sightings of you either. The court ladies confirmed that you hadn't visited the palace at all, which only deepened his worry. You had never missed a day before, and the thought of you being sick or in trouble made his heart sink.
Leaving work that day, the extra lunch he had prepared for you still in his hands, he hurried over to your brother's school in hopes of finding you there. However, his heart sank further when he only found Siwoo waiting by the entrance as usual. The child's face lit up when he spotted the royal secretary.
"Hyung-nim! Did my noona send you here to pick me up today?" Siwoo asked eagerly. The royal secretary shook his head, his concern evident in his expression.
"No, Siwoo-yah. She hasn't been to the palace either. Do you know where her institution is?" San inquired. Your brother's expression turned worried, but he nodded.
"Yes, I do! Let's go find her!" Siwoo suggested, but San gently shook his head.
"No can do, you tell me where and I'll go. Your mother will worry if neither of you are home," San explained. The child reluctantly agreed, but not without making a request.
"Okay, but promise me you'll bring her back," Siwoo pleaded. The secretary gave him a reassuring smile and pinky promised him.
"Don't worry, I will."
As San approached your institution, relief washed over him when he spotted your familiar figure not too far from the main entrance. However, his relief quickly turned to concern when he noticed you weren't alone. Surrounding you were a group of male scholars, their expressions and body language indicating that the conversation was far from pleasant. His heart twisted uncomfortably at the sight of your wet eyes and defeated look. Were you being bullied?
With clenched fists, he stepped closer, his brows narrowing in anger as he overheard snippets of the conversation. It was clear that the group was making disparaging remarks about you. His blood boiled when he heard the leader of the gang suggesting that you had been selling your body in exchange for your success. How dare they?
These bastards.
While San understood that your previous encounters with men must have been unpleasant for you to harbour such a strong dislike for them, witnessing you being treated in such a manner was a first for him. It was no wonder you hated them so much; who could blame you? But he was here now, and he was determined to change that.
He stalked over, his towering and intimidating presence startling the scholars. "Are my ears deceiving me, or did I truly just hear such vile words coming from a scholar?" he demanded, his voice icy and authoritative. "Watch your words because rest assured, your headmaster will hear about this. Not only were you being misogynistic, but how dare you insinuate such despicable things about Scholar Moon? This woman has more integrity than all of you combined. She doesn't need any man's backing—not even mine—to get where she is today. She is fully capable of achieving that on her own, and I think you know that, given how your insecurity and jealousy are blatantly showing through your nasty actions."
The scholars' faces turned pale, their bravado evaporating in the face of the royal secretary's fury. He stepped closer, his fists clenched, ready to defend you from any further insults. The leader of the gang opened his mouth to retort but quickly thought better of it, swallowing his words and casting a nervous glance at his friends.
"L-let's go, guys," Namgil stuttered, bowing before scrambling away. They weren't stupid. This was His Majesty's royal secretary, and if he reported them to the king, they would face dire consequences. There was nothing to gain from angering him.
San turned his gaze to you, his eyes softening. "Are you okay?" he asked gently, his voice a stark contrast to the harsh tone he had just used.
Instead of a grateful nod like he had expected, you met him with a darkened expression. Taking deep breaths, you tried to hold back your tears and calm yourself down. When you remained silent, glaring at him, he sighed. "Was that too much? I—I'm sorry, I know you can defend yourself, but I just—"
You cut him off, speaking in a low voice, "This is all your fault, Choi San."
He froze, his heart clenching painfully at the last words he expected to hear from you. You continued, harshly wiping away stray tears with your sleeves, "If only you'd just leave me alone like I asked from the beginning… I've been bullied all my life, but the usual nonsense I could endure. Not once—never—had anyone ever implied something like that," you whispered the last part. "And it's all because of you. Haven't you done enough? If you truly want to help me, then please—god—please, just leave me alone."
With that, you walked out of the institution, leaving him reeling in shock and hurt at your words. This was not how he had imagined things would turn out.
San finally realised that maybe his sister had been right. If distancing himself would make you happier, he’d do it, even if it meant suffering from being away from you. From that day onwards, he would make sure to keep his distance, honouring your wish.
You went to your younger brother’s school that evening and were surprised to hear that he had already been picked up. Panicking, you rushed home and were relieved to see Siwoo safely at the entrance, waiting with your worried mother. He clung tightly to you as you stroked his hair.
"Who brought you home?" you asked softly.
He sniffled, "Sannie hyung-nim… he promised he’d bring you home, but he lied. You came home alone."
You sighed, holding the child closer as guilt slowly crept into your heart. "He didn’t lie, Siwoo-yah. He did come to me, but I was the one who left him."
Your mother watched you with concern, her eyes reflecting relief and confusion. She reached out, placing a gentle hand on your shoulder. "What happened, dear?"
You hesitated, the weight of the day's events pressing down on you. "I— I just... he won't bother us again, mother. I made sure of that."
Siwoo looked up at you, his eyes wide with innocence and confusion. "But why, noona? He was so nice to us."
Tears threatened to spill from your eyes as you hugged your brother tighter. "It will protect us. It will make things easier."
You were aware that you were trying to convince yourself more than anyone else. But you would rather die than admit it. You were Scholar Moon, the first female scholar in Joseon, and you didn't need a man to survive. You never did, and you never would. Choi San was merely a hindrance, but he was now in the past. Things would finally return to normal. You would excel in your exams and fulfil your dreams. Everything would be fine.
Or would it really?
Days following that proved much harder than anticipated. The royal secretary had indeed left you alone, as you'd requested. While you should have been glad, a part of you felt irritated by his obedience. You resented that he hadn't fought harder, but you knew you had no one to blame but yourself. You felt difficult to deal with. Surely, a man as good as Choi San deserved someone better than you. He had gone above and beyond to help you for the past few months, yet all you gave him in return were harsh words you... likely didn't mean at all.
Wait, what even are these thoughts? None of that should matter; it's all in the past. You needed to focus on your studies.
With a massage of your temples, you attempted to reread the same sentence you had been struggling with for the past hour. However, endless thoughts of that stupid man kept resurfacing, haunting you and weighing heavy on your heart with an unpleasant feeling you wished would disappear. God, did you hate him. Why was he so annoying even when he wasn't around?
You hated how he consumed your thoughts.
Everywhere you turned in the palace, he lingered in your mind. Each time you picked up your brother, he intruded into your thoughts, and even passing by your educational institution's entrance reminded you of him. What was wrong with you? What had he done to you? You were fine before meeting him, and you would be fine now. You kept repeating this to yourself, but all resolve crumbled when you saw him approaching one morning in the palace. It was the first time seeing him since that day—the day you'd uttered those cruel words to him.
You froze, clutching your books tightly to your chest, bracing yourself for whatever words or actions he might deliver. However, your heart sank when he simply passed by with a respectful nod. Why did that sting so much? You had brought this upon yourself. The urge to chase after him was overwhelming, and you squeezed your eyes shut to suppress the longing.
Pull yourself together, this is for the best.
You didn't need him.
Or did you?
Why does it hurt so much?
The atmosphere between you and the royal secretary had shifted, turning awkward and strained. Everyone in the palace could sense the change, the tension that now defined your interactions—or rather, the lack thereof. The once easy camaraderie had vanished, replaced by uncomfortable silences and fleeting, cautious glances. It wasn't long before word reached Namgil, who seized the opportunity to make your life even more miserable. The bullying intensified, but you endured it all, determined to pass your final exam without incident.
Time flew by, even as you suffered.
You buried yourself in your studies, hoping to push him out of your mind. Every page you turned, every line you read, was an attempt to forget the way he made you feel. The palace corridors, once filled with the warmth of his ever-comforting presence, now echoed with your lonely footsteps and the quiet rustle of your books.
Days turned into weeks, and before you knew it, your final examination was approaching. The weight of the upcoming test pressed down on you, but it was a welcome distraction from the pain in your heart. You could still see him in the palace, still catch glimpses of his familiar figure in the distance, but the gap between you felt insurmountable.
On the eve of your exam, you found yourself in the palace library, surrounded by stacks of books and scrolls. The dim light of the lantern cast long shadows across the room, mirroring the shadows in your heart. You took a deep breath, trying to calm your racing thoughts.
Then, without warning, the door creaked open, and there he was. San, standing in the doorway, looking just as conflicted as you felt. Your heart skipped a beat, and for a moment, neither of you moved.
"Scholar Moon," he finally said, his voice low and hesitant. "I heard your final exam is tomorrow. I wanted to wish you luck."
You nodded, trying to keep your voice steady. "Thank you, Royal Secretary Choi."
He took a step closer, his eyes searching yours. "I know you asked me to leave you alone, but I just want you to know that I believe in you. You are more than capable of achieving your dreams."
Tears threatened to well up in your eyes, but you blinked them away. "I appreciate that," you replied, your voice barely above a whisper.
For a moment, it seemed like he might say more, but then he simply nodded and turned to leave. As the door closed behind him, you felt a pang of regret. You had to fight everything in you to resist running after him, holding onto him, telling him how much you regretted everything, how wrong you had been, how much you… missed him.
No, stop it.
You took a deep breath and returned to your books, knowing that tomorrow's exam was the key to your future. You had to stay focused. You had to succeed, even if it meant pushing aside the feelings you couldn't quite shake.
The next morning, your mother smoothed your robes as you prepared to leave for the palace where the final examination would take place. Her hands were gentle, but the pride in her eyes was unmistakable.
"This is it," she whispered, a soft smile on her face. "All your hard work will pay off today. You will finally be someone in this land. The first female scholar-official in Joseon."
You nodded, taking a deep breath to steady your nerves. Today was the day you had worked so tirelessly for. Today, you would prove yourself.
"You look beautiful, noona!" Siwoo cheered, his excitement contagious.
You smiled down at your little brother, ruffling his hair. "Thank you, Siwoo-yah. I'll make you proud."
As you stepped outside, the morning sun casting a golden hue over the palace grounds, you felt a surge of determination. You wouldn't have time to think about a certain annoying man who had been invading your thoughts more than you cared to admit. You wouldn't let the memory of Choi San torment you more than Namgil and his friends ever could.
With each step towards the examination hall, you reminded yourself of your goals. You were Scholar Moon, the first female scholar in Joseon. You were about to make history.
As you entered the courtyard, the confident bounce in your step reflected the culmination of years of hard work and determination. You were oblivious to the devious grins Namgil and a few other scholars exchanged as their gazes followed your figure.
"There she is," Namgil sneered, nodding toward the bridge above the large pond that everyone would later cross to reach the examination hall. A wicked idea formed in his mind. "Remind me, boys. It would be impossible for someone with drenched clothes to participate in the final examination, is that correct?"
They snickered, immediately understanding his implication. "Yes, I think that is right."
You moved through the crowd, nodding to a few familiar faces, your mind already focused on the examination ahead. You had no idea that behind you, Namgil and his cronies were plotting to ruin everything you had worked all your life for.
As the time approached for the scholars to cross the bridge and enter the hall, you took a deep breath, steeling yourself for the challenge ahead. This was your moment, and nothing would stand in your way.
Or so you thought.
As you stepped onto the bridge, Namgil and his cronies moved into position. With a quick, coordinated push, you were sent plummeting into the pond below. The cold water enveloped you, and panic set in immediately. You flailed, trying to keep your head above water, but it was futile. "H-help! Please!"
Laughter erupted from above. Namgil and his friends stood at the edge of the bridge, their mocking laughter ringing in your ears.
"Oops! Looks like Scholar Moon won't be making history today," Namgil taunted, his voice dripping with malice.
"I... c-can't swim..."
Everyone froze, the courtyard falling silent as your bully's laughter ceased. The realisation hit them like a ton of bricks: the pond was much deeper than they had anticipated, and you couldn't swim. Your desperate cries for help echoed in the sudden stillness, turning their malicious prank into a potential tragedy.
Panic spread among the scholars as they realised what they had done. What began as sabotage could now be seen as attempted murder, and their futures hung in the balance. Namgil's face drained of colour as he watched you struggle, knowing full well the consequences of their actions.
Fortunately for you, and unfortunately for them, San happened to be dropping by to observe the examination. His heart plummeted at the sight before him. Without a second thought, he pushed through the panicked crowd of useless men and plunged into the pond, desperate to save you.
His strong arms wrapped around you, pulling you up from the depths. He swam with determined strokes, bringing you to the safety of the pond's edge. As he hoisted you onto solid ground, he checked for signs of life, his own breath coming in ragged gasps from the effort and fear.
You coughed and sputtered, expelling water from your lungs as you gasped for air. San's relieved expression melted into one of fierce protectiveness and anger. He turned to face the group of terrified scholars, his eyes blazing with fury.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" he demanded, his voice a low growl. "Do you have any idea what you almost did?"
Namgil and his friends could only stammer incoherent excuses, their earlier bravado replaced by sheer terror. The royal secretary's intervention had saved you, but it had also sealed their fate.
A few examiners rushed out just in time to witness the chaos, their expressions darkening at the sight of the guilty, terrified faces of Namgil and his cronies. Realising the gravity of their actions, the bullies pleaded for mercy as they were escorted away to face the consequences.
The royal secretary turned toward you, gently brushing aside the damp strands of hair that clung to your face, his touch tender. "Are you okay?" he asked softly, his concern evident in his expression.
Your lips quivered at the tenderness in his voice and the worry etched on his face. He was the first and only man to care so deeply for you, and you couldn't fathom how you had repeatedly pushed him away. But now, tired of denying your feelings, you couldn't hold back the tears that welled up in your eyes. With a broken sob, you shook your head. "No… I'm not," you whimpered, wrapping your arms around his neck and burying your face in his shoulder.
He hesitated for a moment, startled by your sudden embrace, before returning it, enveloping you in his arms. "What's wrong? Tell me," he murmured, his voice laced with concern.
You sobbed harder, weakly hitting him. "It's you… y-you're so annoying, you know that? I hate it so much… hate that I love you."
He pulled back, wide-eyed, holding your shoulders at arm's length as he gazed into your tear-filled eyes. "Wh-what did you say…? This isn't a dream, is it?"
Through your tears, you chuckled at his reaction. "I finally muster the courage to confess to you, and that's your response?"
His smile broke through, the one you adored so much, the one where his eyes disappeared into slits, bringing warmth and comfort no matter how hard things got. Pulling you back into his arms, he stroked the back of your head. "I love you too..."
"How's your first day as a Scholar-Official, Moon?" inquired the royal secretary as you grinned at him. "It's going well, Royal Secretary Choi. Thank you for asking."
After he assisted you in petitioning His Majesty for another chance at your final examination, arguing that you were merely a victim of foul play, you were granted the opportunity. As anticipated, you passed with flying colours, ranking at the top of the batch. Finally, you held the prestigious title of scholar-official.
However, that wasn't the only change in your life. Choi San openly courted you, much to the king's approval, solidifying your status as a formidable power couple.
Leaning down to plant a kiss on your forehead, he smiled, "I'll see you after work."
You blushed and gently pushed him away. "Not here, please. But yes, I'll see you later."
As you left the palace after your day's work, you spotted a familiar face. Smiling, you greeted her, but your steps faltered when she bowed respectfully.
"Hi there. I remember you," you said, trying to recall where you had met her before.
She grinned knowingly. "Yes, it's good to see you again, Scholar-Official Moon. I suppose you believe my words about the royal secretary now, don't you? After all, you and he are the talk of the palace."
Your cheeks flushed, recalling that she had been the court lady to disclose San's identity during your initial encounter. You nodded awkwardly, trying to recover from your embarrassment.
She chuckled softly. "Well then, don't let me keep you. Royal Secretary Choi is waiting for you by the entrance."
Your heart soared at the sight of San standing by the entrance, just as the court lady had claimed. He was waiting for you, and the realisation filled you with an indescribable warmth. This wasn't just any man; this was your man. Yours alone. The sight of him, tall, handsome, kind, and caring, reaffirmed your feelings.
Without a second thought, you ran over, calling out, "Sannie!" He turned towards you, his face lighting up with that beam that never failed to make your heart race. His arms opened wide, and you leapt into them, feeling a rush of joy at being in his embrace.
"I missed you, honey," he whispered, his voice filled with affection.
You pressed your lips against his, relishing the moment as his response came swiftly, his kiss soft and reassuring. Pulling back slightly, a smile played on your lips, your heart dancing with joy. "I missed you too, my big baby," you teased.
"Come on, remember you wanted to learn more about my past?" you said, chuckling at the pout on his face as you pulled away.
He nodded eagerly, and you took his hand, leading him towards a place you hadn't visited in a long time.
"So, this was the root of your hatred for men…" he murmured, his gaze fixed on your father's grave as you stood beside him. You had just finished recounting everything that had transpired, from the beginning of your existence to the hardships you endured to reach where you are today.
"Yes, but you showed me that not all men are the same," you replied softly, your voice tinged with gratitude.
He gently squeezed your hands, turning to face you with a serious expression. "And I won't stop showing you. I promise I'll be different from your father and every other man you've encountered. I'll protect you and your family as if they were my own. I'll strive to be the best husband to you and father to our future child. You'll never have to suffer alone again. I'm here for you," he whispered, his forehead resting against yours.
You chuckled softly through your tears, nodding in response. "That's amusing… I don't recall agreeing to be your wife just yet. What are you talking about, Choi San?"
He let out a playful whine, "Hey! You—wait... you said 'yet' though, so that means... you will eventually, right?" he asked hopefully.
Teasingly, you stuck your tongue out at him before turning and running away. But deep down, you knew that no matter how far you went, he would always be there to catch you.
Of course, you idiot.
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Holy crap, I was gone for like 2 weeks and I return to 1.85k+ followers?! ASDFGHJKL thank you all so much😭
Anyway, I hope this was decent, y'all... I swear, I didn't plan for this part to be so freaking long HAHA but I just felt like it would take quite a bit for her hatred to turn into love hehe I hope the ending didn't feel rushed or anything :3
As always, thank you for reading and let me know your thoughts! ❤️
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kiame-sama · 2 months ago
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Humans Are Extinct (Yandere!TWST x Fem!Reader) Monster AU pt 6
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(Quickly running out of Monster men drawings to use as my chapter pictures. May be a hot minute until I get the next chapter out since my laptop can barely stay conscious long enough to draw another one and I want to only use the monster AU versions of the characters for this series.)
Warnings; multiple yanderes, platonic yanderes, romantic yanderes, monster AU, eating Humans mentioned, more AU history, Cater is not having a very Cay-Cay day, food is an excellent way to bring groups together, Fauns, Satyrs, Kelpies, Crow Fae, Unicorns, Water Nymphs, vampire bats, dragons, cervitaurs, Raiju, Mermen, Cecaelia, Gnolls,
~~~~~~~~
Lunch finally rolled around and you were surprised that Ace and Deuce had actually taken Trey's words seriously and accompanied you to classes. Ace had loudly complained about his volunteering for a little bit but once he saw how many students actually took an interest in you, he stopped complaining and started viewing the task as a kind of important role only he could do. Naturally, Deuce was far less irate about the situation though there were times he almost came across as a punk when it came to others trying to harass you. Both had adjusted well to being around you and come lunch Deuce was actually taking pride in explaining things to you.
"-and that's what makes Fauns different from Satyrs."
"So Fauns are the nicer version of Satyrs?"
"For the most part. Satyrs are known for being loud and always wanting to fight-"
Ace cut Deuce off, shoving an uncooked carrot into the Faun's mouth to silence him. You had seen the two interact and you got the distinct feeling that the Faun and Satyr had more of a brotherly relationship with one another. Where they both had different personalities, when they did agree on something it was practically a law to them.
It was fascinating to hear that these monster men had similar names to the mythical creatures from your world and you wondered why such an overlap existed. Maybe the Humans from your world did interact with this world in the past, or maybe it was just a coincidence. Still, it seemed almost too close to be mere coincidence.
"Anyway, now that Dunce here is done talking-"
"You know my name is Deuce-"
"Like I said, now that Dunce is done talking, I have questions for you, (Y/n)."
You almost laughed at the back and forth banter of the two Goats- Faun and Satyr respectively- as their voices fumbled over one another. Truth was, you had been expecting far more questions than the few they threw at you between classes, so now was as good a time as any to ask.
"Okay, what do you want to know?"
"So, you don't have magic? Like, at all?"
"No magic whatsoever. Where I came from, magic is a myth and no creatures have magic."
"Okay. But how do Humans survive? No horns, no claws, nothing to protect themselves from bigger creatures."
"We make weapons. I know you all have bows, arrows, and knives, we have the same. Guns too, but I haven't seen any guns used here."
"Wait, what is a gun?"
"Basically an automatic bow that fires little pieces of metal using explosive powder that needs a spark which launches the metal through their target."
Ace seemed almost excited by your vague explanation of a gun, opening his mouth to ask you another question. His voice died in his throat as his gaze locked onto something behind you, prompting you to turn around to look at whatever it was that had unsettled Ace.
Standing not too far from you was the large figure of the Horse-man Trey. Ace told you he was a Kelpie, but you just couldn't make that connection seeing as he looked like a big white horse and not a water kelp-horse like Kelpies were supposed to be. He was clearly making good on his threat to check in as he approached you with a patient smile on his face.
"Hello (Y/n), have Heartslabyul's first-years been adequate guides for you today?"
"Yes. Grim doesn't even have to try half as hard to keep me safe now and I haven't been late to any of my classes other than the first one."
Trey gave a genuine smile at this, nodding his head as he was pleased to know his choice had been a good one. Seeing the centaur made you wonder about Cater and what may have become of the air-head student. In some ways, you worried asking would have a negative effect, but you were so curious you couldn't help but inquire about him.
"So... What happened to Cater?"
"He is being dealt with by the Headmage. He's lucky he isn't going to get expelled for what he did, but once the Headmage is done with his punishment, he's going to be turned over to Riddle."
"Is Riddle mad about all of this?"
"Well... I actually haven't told Riddle yet. He has a short fuse and isn't going to take Cater's actions well, especially since he asked both Cater and I to protect you if we happened across you. Odds are Cater is going to be collared and kicked out of his room for the foreseeable future."
This made you frown in contemplation at the prospect of the Red-haired student being punished too harshly. Though you were upset Cater took photos of you without asking and likely set several poachers on your trail, you didn't want harm to come to him. Sure, he was stupid and made a stupid choice, but he shouldn't be hurt or kicked out of his home for it.
"... If he is kicked out of his room, is there anywhere else he can go?"
"No. Riddle is very strict about rule-breakers being banned from the dorms so long as they have one of his collars on, and most other dorms aren't keen to house a student that isn't theirs. He's probably going to be sleeping in the Heartslabyul lake if Riddle doesn't ban him from there too."
The morality of the issue weighed on you and made you worry about the ditzy redhead. Though you didn't really trust Cater or his clearly impaired decision making skills, you still felt like he deserved basic decency despite his actions. You knew firsthand how the creatures that lived around campus were genuinely terrifying and dangerous, so you didn't want him thrown to the metaphorical or actual wolves.
"Can... can Cater stay in my dorm?"
Your question earned you several dubious looks from the Goats and Trey as if you had grown another head or said something unhinged. Even Grim had to pause his hesitant raw veggie medley- the only thing the cafeteria served today- to stare at you in surprise.
"You- you want Cater in your dorm? Why?"
"Well, it wasn't like he knew what he was doing was bad, and I don't think he should be left outside for his poor choice."
"(Y/n), do you realize how vicious poachers are in Twisted Wonderland? You will be hunted every moment of every day because Cater couldn't keep himself from posting you to that stupid Magicam app he is obsessed with. The second you are unguarded you will be attacked. The Headmage is even considering assigning Sam and Vargas to your dorm just to make sure poachers can't get in, or even moving you to Diasomnia so Malleus can protect you. I don't think you understand just how seriously we need to take your safety."
"I'm just a Human though, I'm not a princess or someone important. Why all the fuss?"
Your comment made Trey let out a long and exasperated sigh, his gaze leaving your confused form as he tried to keep in mind just how new you were to their world. Humans were never just Humans in Twisted Wonderland, and them simply dying out has made a far felt ripple in the history of every known species. For so long, so many species had adored and tried to protect Humans, but even they couldn't save the fragile species from the hunger so many magic users had for their very flesh.
Most things in the technological realm and cooking realm- pastries and phones included- only existed because Humans led the way to them being invented. Even now, technology has been mostly stagnant for over a hundred years with only the Shrouds having any aptitude as far as advancements were concerned. Trey himself had Humanity to thank for his family's bakery and the many cuisines local to the Queendom of Roses.
"(Y/n), Humans have never been 'just Humans' to us. Maybe to Sunset Savana, but never to the Queendom of Roses. Even Briar Valley had laws in place to protect your kind from everyone else. I get you may not understand it, but compared to most other species, Humans were better than most in the emotional and critical thinking department. It was Humans creating new inventions, coming up with unique ideas, and above all else, peacekeeping between the various species and races to the point they were called Beast-Tamers. Most wouldn't even speak to their Fae counterparts until Humans got the two to interact amicably."
You were somewhat surprised to hear all of this, having been under the impression that Humans were mainly pets to the other species. It was interesting to hear what Humans were credited for and that despite all they did to help, they were still hunted as food until extinction. The few from Savanaclaw you interacted with had been both sides of the spectrum of threatening you or being peaceful to you and it made you wonder just what kind of species were still keen to get a taste of your forbidden flesh.
"Honestly," Trey continued, "I wouldn't be surprised if several Kingdoms and Queendoms sent ambassadors to take you away from Night Raven for your own safety. I just know the international law makers are going to have a field day the moment it becomes common knowledge that you're here."
It made sense that Trey was stressed about this, you knew from your own home how aggressively endangered and near-extinct species had to be protected, but you still felt Cater shouldn't carry all the blame. If it wasn't Cater, it would have been someone else. Just because he was the fool to do it first didn't mean that others wouldn't have tried or succeeded in the same endeavor.
"Still, if he gets kicked out of the dorms tonight, will you at least tell him I will let him stay with me?"
"If you really want me to," he sighed heavily, "I guess I can tell Cater about your offer. I won't tell Riddle though, knowing how that Unicorn is, he will actually harm Cater for even thinking about taking shelter with you after what he's done."
~•§•~
"HE DID WHAT?!"
Riddle was beside himself with rage and even stomped his hooves against the marble floors of the Headmage's office, almost cracking the stone with his rage. Cater was trying to sink into his chair and hide from the Sophomore Housewarden who was beyond the point of furious with the water Nymph. Not only did he get a dressing-down from the Headmage, but he was going to be thrown at the mercy of his own Housewarden who was known for being an absolute hard-ass on rule breakers.
"It wasn't like I was trying to target her! I just-"
"SILENCE! YOU WILL SPEAK WHEN SPOKEN TO, CATER DIAMOND!"
The firm tone Riddle used made Cater shut his mouth and bow his head, trying to avoid upsetting the Unicorn further. There was no way he would be able to go back to his room at this rate and odds are he would be sleeping in the forest if Riddle had anything to say about it. Plus, he still had that essay to write for Trein that was due tomorrow.
"He apparently took a selfie with (Y/n) and posted it to Magicam with hashtags indicating she is Human. By the time I got him to delete the post, it had been downloaded several thousand times. Since then I have already received a call from the Royal Sword Academy Headmage to confirm a Human lives here now, and what we as the heads of our schools can do to protect her. No doubt representatives from Briar Valley and the Queendom of Roses have already been dispatched and will arrive on the island soon enough, not to mention how many poachers are likely on their way here as we speak."
Cater knew how upset Riddle was given the fact the Unicorn's horn was humming loudly with magic and the Unicorn himself was a bright red. Things really weren't coming up Cay-Cay today.
"OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!"
~•§•~
You felt a bit more comfortable with the school as a whole by the time classes had finished for the day. Practical Magical Theory was an interesting class, even if you really didn't have the faintest idea what they were talking about. According to Ace, you were lucky you didn't have Flight Class because there was a high chance you wouldn't be able to participate in the class itself. Still, you were happy to have a moment to let things settle down for a bit.
Ace and Deuce walked you to your dorm, but had been called to Heartslabyul by a quick text from Trey, leaving you alone in the dorm with Grim. Despite the beginning of the day being an absolute wash, the rest of the day hadn't been too bad. It was around this time you decided you may as well start on making some dinner. You could hear Grim's stomach growling already as you both went to the kitchen.
"Are you gonna make something good like you did for breakfast?"
"I'm going to try to."
"What are you gonna make?"
"Well, I was thinking we have the stuff here for a really nice soup-"
You were promptly cut off by the Kitchen door swinging open with a loud bang. Clearly, you were going to have to tell the professors or even the Headmage Crow about securing that side door given how it had already been used twice by others seeking to get into your dorm. Luckily for you, those that walked through the door had at least two familiar faces in the group.
"Sorry for interrupting," Lilia called out, happily making his way over to you in an almost bouncy gait, much like a bird hopping around, "hope you don't mind I brought Malleus, Silver, and Sebek too. I heard one of the Heartslabyul students blew the whistle on you being here in NRC. Figured you could use a bit of extra protection in case any poachers try their luck. Besides, the nest here is just as big as Malleus' nest in Diasomnia."
It was then Malleus spoke, his voice a deep rumble in his chest as he looked over you.
"They will not lay a hand upon my hoard without paying with their lives for such a transgression."
It was clear the Dragon was not happy with the events that took place and he seemed to be quite content claiming you as one of his Hoard. When Lilia explained it to you last night, apparently the moment Malleus decided he was adding someone to his Hoard, he became extremely attached to that person and would even become violent in their defense. Given the way others talked about him, he must have been a genuinely frightening and powerful person to command such fear and respect.
"... So does that mean I'm making soup for all of you or..?"
"If you don't mind. I certainly want another bite of your cooking, (Y/n)!"
Lilia took his perch back on the counter and swung his feet, seeming rather impish and almost childish in his behavior. You just shrugged and nodded, gathering enough ingredients to feed the group several times over. Your hope was that there would be some left over for you to take during lunches. As nice as it was to have raw foods once in a while, you'd rather your meals be cooked.
Grim clearly only trusted Lilia and sat next to the Bat to watch you bustle around the kitchen. He even let out a soft purr when Lilia began to pet his forehead and ears. Where you would have scolded them for sitting on the counter, it wasn't like you didn't have enough counter space already. Starting the broth and preparation was rather simple for you and it was clear those standing around you were keen to watch you prepare the soup.
"(Y/n)," Grim meowed, "where did you learn to do all this fancy stuff?"
"Humans usually cook their food. So I just learned while growing up. Of course there are some things you can have without cooking, like a sandwich or a fruit salad, but most big meals are better cooked. Now, that doesn't mean every Human can cook well, but most are good enough at it."
"So does that mean I can have more of the food you cook?"
"Like a bigger portion? No. But you will always get to have some of whatever I make, okay?"
Grim purred loudly at this, his face lighting up with an excited smile. Clearly the little creature was pleased with your arrangement even if it meant he had to go to boring classes with you. The food was absolutely worth it and he got to sleep in a mountain of pillows and blankets after a long day. It was all way better than the hole in the ground he occupied when he wasn't actively running for his life before he met you.
Once you got most of the soup started, you knew it just needed to be covered and cooked, listening idly to Lilia talk with the others about the events of breakfast and the Gnoll that invited himself in. It was when you finally got this moment that you took a good look at the other two visitors who were either Silver or Sebek, seeing as Lilia didn't point out who was who.
Much to your surprise, one of them reminded you of the Kelpie and Unicorn you had met earlier but he had an obvious three point antler rack attached to his head. His lower half was that of a reindeer and was fairly fluffy compared to the short coats of the Kelpie and Unicorn. Part of you wanted to test if he was as soft as he looked, but you figured it would not be considered appropriate to pet him.
The second new face was an almost canine like man with pale green hair that was slicked back and spiked up at the ends. His eyes were intense as was the apparent scowl that held his features, two sharply pointed dog ears atop his head. Bright yellow-green eyes tracked your every move and regarded you with as much curiosity as you regarded him. The similar medium length tail fur swayed lazily as his tail slowly began to wag when you looked at him.
The soup was beginning to smell rather good and it was clear four of the five others in the kitchen were taking note as they occasionally sniffed the air. Lilia, Grim, Silver, and Sebek were clearly keenly interested in the scent but it was Malleus' behavior that caught your attention. Instead of sniffing or lifting his nose as the others did, his forked tongue slowly slid from between his lips like a snake as if he were tasting the air. You almost laughed at the oddly reptile behavior before his gaze suddenly snapped to the door of the kitchen.
Standing in the doorway was a curious looking man that seemed to have fins on the sides of his head. His almost scaled skin had a kind of faint green tint to it with intense blue undertones, his eyes being two different colors with the right one being a pale gray and the left one being a bright gold. Atop his head were tousled blue-green locks with a singular black stripe that crossed over his forehead above his left eye.
"Oya, it seems I'm not the only one with culinary interests. Apologies for intruding, but the lovely smell drew me in. Would you mind telling me what it is you're making?"
You were surprised to see the almost Fish-like man despite how polite he was being with you. Instead of hopping in to defend you, Lilia looked at you for what you wanted to do with this interloper. Malleus seemed rather keen to rid you of this newcomer's presence but you held up a hand to stop him from acting. Part of you worried this new visitor was dangerous, but because he was wearing a school uniform you figured he was just another student.
"Soup?"
"... May I ask what kind?"
"Only if you tell me your name first and what you were doing around my dorm."
"Ah, forgive me. It seems in my haste to get to the heart of the matter, I forgot my manners. My name is Jade Leach, I'm the Vice-Housewarden of Octavinelle. I'm going to assume from your appearance you are the highly talked-of Human now living on campus. Azul informed us that you would be remaining here for the time being. As for what I was doing, I am rather interested in the foods that grow wild above water, so I was out gathering some mushrooms to sample."
He lifted the foraging bag that hung over his shoulder, showing you the contents within. He was right in that he had gathered up a fair few number of mushrooms and there were several that you actually recognized. You were no master of mushrooms- of course- but you still recognized a few species that were safe for you to eat, seeing several button mushrooms among the many gathered.
Those would be great in the soup you were making, and it was early enough that you could add them right in and they would cook just fine.
"Okay, Jade. I believe you were at least out gathering mushrooms which is innocent enough. I'm actually curious if you wanted to trade for some of those button mushrooms you have, they'd go great in the soup I'm making. In return I'll tell you about it and you can have some to eat if you'd like."
Jade actually seemed to brighten up at this, his smile becoming less strained and his expression smoothing from the stressed way his brows had been pulled together. It was almost as if he had been wanting to ask for some soup but was far too polite to actually inquire. He nodded and set his bag on the counter, letting you pick out the little rounded white mushrooms from the selection he gathered.
"I'm quite partial to the cuisines the different kingdoms have to offer. Rare as it can be to find those who are masters of their craft, I would still like to sample the meals above the ocean waves. I would be grateful for whatever knowledge you can share with me. It isn't every day that someone adept at cooking graces this school."
"Hey," Grim interrupted loudly as you set to dicing the mushrooms, "that's my Hooman you're talking to! She only cooks for me, but I'm kind enough to share with all of you. Don't forget it, got it?"
Jade gave a rather patient simper to your primary companion, resting his right hand over his heart in an almost polite gesture.
"But of course. I'm simply interested in learning to make such meals for myself. I'm certain Azul and Floyd would be keen to taste such a wonderful smelling dish."
This seemed to satisfy your little companion as he nodded with a pleased smile, watching you add the mushrooms to the rather large pot you decided to make the soup in. Thankfully it was a cauldron type pot made for cooking soups over firepits. The fire so dutifully warming your meal crackled pleasantly even as you stirred the bubbling mixture.
"Do you want to ask them to come over, Jade? I made way too much. Honestly, everyone here could all have a bowl, a second bowl, and I would still have enough soup for the rest of the week. I think I went a little overboard in the food department. Should have probably started with a smaller pot, but we're already this far..."
Jade seemed surprised at this, but nodded respectfully and pulled out his phone. You were curious just what Jade was as you really hadn't seen many fish-men during your day, but you weren't going to ask him. If he wanted to tell you what he was, that was his business. Didn't make you any less curious though.
"If you're certain? I'm sure Floyd will be thrilled to have something new to try. He doesn't like some mushrooms, but I don't believe he has tried the ones you've selected, and he certainly hasn't tried cooked mushrooms yet. Azul may try to heckle you into a deal, however. He is always looking for new ways to improve the Monstro Lounge."
"Yeah, of course I'm certain. I offered, didn't I?"
He nodded and began tapping away at his phone, but Lilia seemed rather keen to speak up. The Bat had been listening keenly to the conversation and felt he needed to make himself clear to the notoriously crafty student.
"If Azul threatens (Y/n) or tries to force her into a deal, we will have more than a few problems, understood?"
"He is aware. Believe it or not, those of us from the Coral Sea are actually quite fond of the legacy of Humans. Even Floyd has been babbling excitedly about meeting (Y/n) here."
"That's right, Humans were popular among the various merfolk kingdoms. You all even have a famous story involving the mermaid princess falling for a Human and joining him on land."
"Yes. She struck a deal with The Sea Witch to gain legs she could use to dance for the Human man she fell in love with, too bad the deal didn't hide her gills or fins though. Still, the Human loved her."
You listened to the conversation as you stirred the soup, glad that all of the flavors seemed to be coming together rather well despite the large amount of food you found yourself making. Judging from the conversation Lilia and Jade happened to be having, Jade was a Merman of some kind and apparently Mermen were one of the 'safe species' for Humans to interact with. Though you knew not to judge an individual by the species, it did put you at ease to know he was one of the safer ones.
It was as you were taste testing the soup that the door to the kitchen once again flew open as another visitor invited themselves in. It was offical now, four times proved it was far too easy to get into your dorm through that door. Maybe Lilia would be able to fix it for you, or Malleus seeing as Lilia said it was the Dragon who had mostly fixed up your current abode.
"(Y/n), you're an absolute angel! I thought I was going to have to sleep in the woods once Riddle temporarily banned me from Heartslabuyl! He won't even let me sleep in the lake even though I'm a Lake Water Nymph because of what happened. You believe me when I say I didn't mean to put you in danger, right?"
Cater had thrown himself at your feet, holding onto your legs as if he were some abandoned pet seeking shelter from a blizzard. Around his neck was a thick metal collar that extended out to the sides in black and red colors, forming a heart-shape that locked in the front with a golden and black padlock. He was careful not to get in the fire that was dutifully cooking your soup even as he groveled at your feet.
"O-oi! What's the big idea with everyone coming in that door? It's dangerous to leave that thing unlocked."
"That's what I'm saying! So much for protected and safe with that thing in here."
You couldn't help but slightly grin at Grim as he voiced your own concerns out loud. Lilia simply regarded the door, snapping his fingers to close it as a large metal bolt affixed itself to the door before clicking into place.
"There. Now it can't be thrown open anymore. But why is Cater here? Cater, when did Riddle collar you and why?"
Cater seemed to realize there were others standing around you as he suddenly straightened up, clearing his throat and taking several steps back from you. He tried to play off the desperate display he had just shown and was failing miserably. Cater looked much worse for wear than you remembered him being and you genuinely began to hope the Unicorn hadn't actually harmed the ditzy redhead.
"Well... I may have 'accidentally' posted a picture that told everyone that (Y/n) was a Human and was on NRC grounds, but I totes didn't realize it would put her in danger! Honestly!"
Lilia's bemused smile almost instantly fell away into a glare as he regarded the man standing by your side. You added a bit of salt to the soup as you wated, watching the thick broth bubble and roil with vegtables and diced meat. There were a lot of things you could do in that moment, but something told you it was best to let Lilia handle this situation.
"And what did you think was going to happen, Cater?"
"Tbh, I thought that I would just get a follower count boost and everything would be fine. The Headmage and Riddle sure made it clear I was wrong for thinking that. Lessons learned!"
"It only cost us the safety of the last Human left in Twisted Wonderland."
"I said I was sorry!"
Everyone except Cater seemed to be exceptionally upset as they all glared at him, making him duck behind you as if you were the best shield from their rage. You just let the tall student try and fail to escape the ire of the others. For once, a polite knock came at the kitchen door, breaking off the aggressive staredown taking place.
"Hey, why are we here, Azul?"
An almost sing-song voice hummed from somewhere on the other side of the door, prompting Jade to walk over and open the door for who you assumed to be the two he was talking about. In strode a rather lovely looking man with snow-white hair and shining mauve blue eyes hidden behind thin framed glasses. Around his face were lovely and intricate black markings that reminded you quite a bit of the tentacles of an octopus. Behind him lumbered a rather tall man who almost looked identical to Jade if not for the swapped eye color and slight difference in height.
"We're here because Jade told me there is a profitable venture to be had and I am not going to miss out on this chance to make the Human's acquaintance, Floyd."
The shorter one hummed in a smooth voice and you almost giggled at the rather fact-of-the-matter tone that the white haired one spoke with. You felt it was safe to assume the rather lovely man was Azul and the near identical to Jade fish-man walking with him was Floyd.
Floyd almost made a show of sniffing the air, following his nose to where you stood in front of the pot of soup, watching him curiously. Once his gaze fell on you a wide grin overtook the slight frown he had been pouting with. You could see the way his eyes trailed over your figure due to the bright yellow of his right eye highlighting his pupil as it darted up and down.
"Ne ne, what is such a cute little Shrimpy doing this far above the water? You're so small I just want to squeeze ya."
He took a single step towards you and this seemed to be enough for the two- Silver and Sebek- to suddenly intercept him with swords drawn, creating an 'X' that blocked the tall Merman from approaching further. It was more than a little surprising to see weapons suddenly drawn, but maybe you shouldn't be all that surprised. Lilia did say he came over to guard you again and even brought the others for the same purpose.
"Hey, I'm not gonna hurt them, I just want a little feel on if Shrimpy is as soft as they look!"
"Floyd, that's enough. She was polite enough to allow me to invite you and Azul over and she is quite the rare specimen, you can't threaten her so casually and expect those guarding her to not be upset."
"I didn't threaten, I just said I wanted a big ol' squeeze."
"Same difference where you are concerned."
"Eh, you're so boring sometimes, Jade. Anyway, what is Shrimpy making over there? Smells good~!"
You were stunned at the almost aggressive behavior from Floyd given how calm and level headed Jade had been thus far. Maybe it was just a quirk of Floyd's to be a little more hands on than others. It honestly made you glad to know your self-appointed guards took their task seriously as they still refused to let the large Merman near you. Speaking of your guards, Floyd didn't seem put off by their aggression in the slightest and almost seemed amused by them as if it were all one big game.
Tension was thick in the air as the almost aloof Floyd smiled at you, watching you grab several bowls and begin ladling out ten total servings. You were not really all that surprised when there was still more soup to go even after you filled enough bowls for yourself and the ever increasing number of guests.
Maybe you were right to make so much after all. Hopefully your surprise guests had all shown-
"Why is the door locked? Hey, Human, I smell food in there! I already ate all the Dandelions from this morning! Can I have some of whatever you're making? Please? I'm starving out here."
Peaking through the windows to the kitchen was a familiar grizzled muzzle of the Gnoll you had met that morning. Ruggie was staring with those unsettling bright blue eyes and you were unsure if you wanted to laugh or scream. You scolded yourself in the back of your mind, remembering that animals would often return to places if they were given food prior and no doubt the Hyena man sought to do the same.
"Should I let him in, (Y/n)?"
Lilia asked, eyeing the lock on the door as Ruggie began to loudly whine and cackle for attention. You just sighed and nodded, knowing the Hyena wasn't going to leave now that he knew there was food ready and waiting just inside.
"May as well."
The Gnoll was quick to enter once the door opened and he happily grabbed one of the ten bowls, immediately scarfing down the soup without even glancing at the now large group of men standing in your kitchen. You didn't bother offering a spoon to Ruggie as it was clear he didn't need or want one. Despite the odd group that had gathered under your roof- technically it was the school's roof, but now wasn't the time for semantics- they all seemed keen to dig in when you passed out the bowls.
Getting yourself a bowl- seeing as Ruggie had taken one of the ten- you were able to finally take in the meal of your labors. It wasn't half bad and those button mushrooms added just the right earthy flavor that really brought the soup together. All of your visitors clearly liked the soup as well and Grim was the first to ask for seconds.
"Miss (Y/n)! This is a fantastic meal! I don't think I've had such flavors in anything I've eaten before! I would only think a meal from my liege could possibly taste better!"
"Sebek," the white haired one interrupted the shouting one, "you don't need to yell at her."
"I'm talking at an adequate volume, Silver. You dare say this meal isn't divine?"
"That's not what I said at all."
Lilia giggled as the two odd characters argued, hopping off the counter to serve himself another helping of the plentiful soup. Despite the absolute lack of respect for your personal space they all seemed to share, you couldn't help but smile as well. The many men you had met were odd and so unique in many ways but none of them actually seemed all that bad once they relaxed and got talking.
Maybe these monsters weren't as monstrous as you thought when you first met them. Hopefully their worries of poachers would just prove to be worries, but you knew you weren't truly safe yet and anyone could be a threat if they genuinely wanted to be. You just hoped there wasn't another shoe waiting to drop on your peaceful evening.
~•§•~
"Trey?"
"Yes, Riddle?"
"Invite (Y/n) to tomorrow's Unbirthday party. It has become rather clear to me that no one can look after her the way the Queen demands, so I will step up and take on that task."
"Riddle..."
"She will be safe with me, I will do whatever it takes to ensure it."
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pyrodolls · 2 months ago
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I love that Bayani is so damn clingy, but I would never confess that to him.
If we were unfaithful to him, would he still be with us?
if you were unfaithful (superfan! yandere oc x popstar! reader)
warnings: slight nsfw, mentions of vomit, cheating, death, stalking, depression, slight worshipper yandere, established relationship, lowercase intended, reader is gender neutral
a/n: hey guys peep the new acc layout and username omgggg! anyways thanks for all the birthday messages and also update on the bsf drama: i don't know for SURE if she's dating him, cuz she posted the picture of my ex but his face wasn't showing and the caption was talking abt her bf... so maybe she just HAPPENED to use that picture of my ex and the caption was talking about a whole different dude??? idk maybe im just delusional LMAOO but yeah i'm still friends with her cuz she's a total sweetheart and i'm sure it was just a coincidence. anyways sorry for taking such a long break, heres some bayani hcs!! btw guys... just between you and me... i too, am down bad for bayani and love how clingy he is. bring back kind and clingy men instead of men texting you "wyll" on snapchat
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if you were unfaithful to bayani, he would most likely find out through the internet.
bayani is obsessed with you in every single way. so if he couldn’t be with you physically, he’d stalk you through the paparazzi or fans recording your concerts.
there was one concert that bayani unfortunately couldn’t attend. so he simply watched it through a fan’s livestream online. that’s how he noticed another popstar on stage with you. the crowd went wild and started screaming. the arena shook with the vibrations of your fans. the popstar with you started to sing and dance next to you. bayani was always jealous of anyone that got to be around you when he couldn’t, but this was different. the popstar on the stage with you was rumored to be dating you. fans on the internet had been speculating about your relationship for months, claiming that you two were “soulmates” and “secretly dating.”
it made bayani’s blood boil. but he knew it was bound to happen at some point, since you would often rant to him about how suffocating fame could be. he knew it wasn’t your fault. he wasn’t mad at you at all. he knew you still cared about him.
but the song ended, and the popstar next to you wrapped their arms around your body and connected their lips to yours.
the crowd started screaming once more, and the person recording the performance dropped their phone. bayani couldn’t see what was going on.
plus, the livestream was blurry so he couldn’t tell if you were pleased with the popstar’s advances or not.
either way, bayani dropped his phone and threw up.
the minute you arrived home from the concert, bayani ran up to you and grabbed onto your waist, clutching it desperately.
“was what i saw real? are you with that popstar now? are you saying the rumors i saw online were true? i tried to ignore them because i know how your fans can be, but still…” bayani babbled, crying as he spoke and his words slowly became unintelligible.
whether you were interested in the popstar or not didn’t matter. bayani would be on his knees, pleading for an explanation. he would spiral into a pit of self-deprecation, thinking he wasn’t good enough for you, so you went off with someone more attractive and more talented than him. he wouldn’t blame you at all. he wouldn’t be mad at you at all. he’d be mad at himself for not pleasing you enough.
if you weren’t interested in the popstar and it was simply a publicity stunt, you would have to gently hold bayani in your arms to calm him down and explain. he would be SO relieved. he’d still be upset, though. he would be relieved that you’re still interested in him, but he’d also be jealous someone got to kiss and hold you in front of millions of people. bayani would never tell you that, though. he’d try to suck it up and pretend that he’s cool with it, but you can tell he’s really upset (he’s a terrible liar) and you would have to reassure him that you’ll never do it again.
if you WERE interested in the popstar… uh wtf are you doing here?? jkjk but if you were actually dating the popstar, bayani would be crushed. he would probably beg you to stay with him and forget about the popstar, but he'd ultimately fail to convince you. he’s desperate, but he isn’t stubborn. if you rejected him over and over as he begged, he’d get the hint and leave you alone. he just wants you to be happy. as much as he hated seeing you with someone else, he’d want you to live your life however you want.
if you left him, bayani would fall into a deep depression, thinking he failed you. he would never be happy again. he would hate himself for messing up what could've been his perfect life. he could’ve been with you. he could’ve lived happily ever after as your servant for the rest of his life, but he wasn't good enough for you. even though you were the unfaithful one, he’d still believe you were the one in the right. it would haunt him for the rest of his life until he died.
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nothorses · 10 months ago
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What do you think gay men are attracted to in men that they can’t be attracted to in women?
It can’t be anything about femininity or masculinity obviously. That’s both sexist, and cultural so can’t be what drives men-only attraction.
It can’t be anything about stated identity because someone could lie just as easily as they could tell the truth in such a statement, and it makes no sense because homosexuality and heterosexuality exists in other species with no stated identities. It’s not like other animals without gender are all pan.
Saying idk it’s the vibes or some indescribable trait men have that women can’t but “I can’t explain” is a nonanswer.
Soooooooo what is it? Or do you think any sexuality but bi/pan is just cultural performance or an identity rather than an inborn orientation?
- [ ]
I think trying to find one perfect answer that applies universally is the critical mistake here. I mean, I am a gay man. I say this because as of yet, that's the clearest answer I have for myself personally; maybe there's a possibility I experience attraction to a woman at some point (maybe I already have???), but I don't really have clarity on that right now, and it doesn't serve me to shape or explain my identity around "maybe"s.
Trying to pinpoint exactly what it is that attracts me to other men, specifically, is also like... not that useful. I used to find myself really attracted to feminine men specifically; not feminine women, not masculine women, not masculine men, not androgynous anyone, but feminine men. Specifically, men who were feminine in a very particular, long-hair-certain-attitude kind of way.
Recently, I have found myself appreciating, more and more, a certain kind of masculine body type and gay masculinity that I was never really interested in before. I find it incredibly hot. A lot of that coincides with things I appreciate about my partner, too, and things I find myself appreciating more about my partner as time goes on- as well as things my partner expresses appreciation for about me!
And I haven't even touched on attraction to nonbinary folks here because, like, it's a massive spectrum. "Nonbinary" means something different for every individual nonbinary person. To my mind, of course there's a possibility I experience attraction to a nonbinary person; how they identity, present, and what attracts me to them are all even more impossible to know for certain than the "maybe"s and the "why"s around my attraction (or lack thereof) to men and women.
My relationship to my own orientation was vastly different pre-testosterone versus post-testosterone, too. I was much more reserved and uncomfortable with relationships and attraction before I started T, and the only dynamic I ever felt was even a little bit tolerable was one where I was the "masculine woman" in a lesbian relationship. I didn't realize until very shortly after starting T that, actually, I like men. A lot. I felt comfortable with my body and my masculinity in a way I never had been before, and I felt comfortable in relationships with men; I no longer felt like I was The Woman By Default in contrast.
And that's all just me! This is my personal, specific, individual relationship to attraction, and how gender- both others' and my own- factors into my relationship with orientation.
I don't think it's necessarily inborn, or completely unchanging for everyone. I also don't think the same factors apply for everyone. I think a lot of different things can be true for different people, all at once, and it's not really useful to try to pinpoint a specific, universal explanation for orientation.
Everyone has a different relationship to orientation and gender; everyone will be influenced differently by cultural factors, by their own ways of processing and understanding the world around them, by the ways different aspects of their culture, identity, personality, and inborn traits and how they all interact with one another, and sure, maybe even by biological factors and tendencies.
Trying to solve this puzzle for the entire world of diverse human beings isn't going to make it any easier to understand yourself. Focus on what this all means for you, personally, and accept that you will never, can never, fully and perfectly understand anyone else's internal world and workings. Things get a lot easier when you can let go of that & just appreciate the diversity of human experiences, y'know?
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forgettable-au · 10 months ago
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WHAT IS THIS AU? HOW DOES IT WORK?
A brief (I'm lying, this is a long post) explanation post for this AU for anyone new <3
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As I've mentioned before, this AU is based on the theory that Papyrus is (was) Gaster. I did not create this theory, it has existed for a long time as far as I know and I'm also not the first person to do something like this with the concept, I'll touch up on that later.
This is a LONG post, so click keep reading if you really want to check it out :D
About the Papyrus is Gaster theory
I've looked up a lot of stuff about it but I don't actually know where it originated. It's not super popular but if you're a Papyrus theorist you might have heard of it before.
It's not a super serious theory really, it's more about pointing out the weird connections and similarities between Papyrus and Gaster and giving an explanation to the many weird things about Papyrus and his lack of backstory.
Just to mention some things:
Them both speaking in capital letters, having no asterisks, their weird way of phrasing things, Papyrus being described as forgettable, Papyrus hating hotland, pretending he doesn't know about a lot of stuff ( The lab for example, he know what a lab is but pretends he doesn't in front of Sans), Gaster being related to hands and Papyrus never taking his gloves off, Papyrus weird connection with phones (his photo-graphic memory for phone calls) and Gaster's weird connection to phones also(Fun events related to phones, using the phone in the darkworlds and only getting Gaster's garbage sounds), their love for puzzles (The CORE is a giant puzzle), THAT one quote that I still find misterious “beside, it’s rude to talk about people that are listening, right? not everyone is as though as my brother”, Papyrus DOES have Gaster blasters it's pretty much canon even if a lot of people ignore it, Papyrus is very very smart he has a LOT of books, knowledge on many subjects, building stuff, and even made a shakespeare reference when he died (why is he like this lmao), he's the character with the most dialogue in game yet we don't know a lot of stuff about him, he breaks the laws of physics and of the game, he's not in deltarune the heavily Gaster connected game.
Now that's some of the things I could think about, and look, yeah I'm probably looking too much into it and these are all just coincidences and the weird Papyrus things are related to other stuff maybe not Gaster. But I still like this theory, not because I think it's real but because I LOVE the possibilites!!!
About how this AU works
Okay, so this au is basically a -pretend this theory is real and how would the undertale timeline work then!- We're giving Papyrus his backstory and I'm also making a Gaster focused story at the same time.
I will adapt basically how I think a situations like this would play out (and also add some of my other favorite ut theories as a treat)
Papyrus used to be Wingdings and then Wingdings shattered across time and space, Papyrus and Gaster are different separate people.
Actually I kind of, treat WIngdings before and after accident as different people also... you change a lot when you become an omnipresent being. So, Wingdings, Gaster and Papyrus I treat them all as different people.
"How did Gaster become Papyrus?"
He didn't "become" Papyrus just like that. After he shattered he stopped existing like he was before, he became a being in another layer of the game but physically his body was just there
I based this on how the goners and Gaster followers have counterparts that are not, uh, goners that look different or deformed and gray
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Papyrus was just kind af an empty shell at first, he still kept parts of Wingdings original personality but his Papyrus personality developed on his own with time!
"How did Gaster shatter across time and space?"
Usually everyone agrees it was because he fell into the CORE
About similar content
Not here! I don't think the CORE caused his accident, it is a power source not a time and space altering machine. In this story it was some other thing he was working on, and it wasn't so much of an accident per se
If you have more questions you can check the frequently asked questions post or send me an ask <3!!
I've seen some people tell me this is a good idea for an AU and I agree!! I love this idea so much, but as I said before I didn't create this concept or theory I just love it a lot!! and was desperate for content wich I surprisingly did not found much of
I was so surprised, I really thought there would be more people that made this before but I couldn't find much, so I'm just making it myself and one of my goals is to maybe make other people like this idea and make their own takes on it !! cause i think it's neat and would love more perspectives and content
If you by any chance also like this concept as much as I do I just wanted to make this section to name some inspirations for this AU
First, you all should really see "I know that I know nothing" by linssins
It's because of this comic that I discovered that theory in the first place and really loved the concept. It's my main inspiration, unfortunately the comic is unfinished. If you see it you will definitely see how I took inspiration... Still my story and this au is a different take on the theory, it goes on a different path.
Also another inspiration for finding more stuff about the theory were
@askthesciencesquad This comic is paused but it's also a Papyrus!Gaster comic! and I was very happy to find it, it is also a very different take on the concept but I liked where it was going. The same person also has this other blog where they put a lot of Papyrus is gaster stuff :0 @deviodofmeat
Okay so that's it, maybe I missed some stuff? but if I remeber i'll just add it later, that's what's good about tumblr.
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accio-victuuri · 2 months ago
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okay, let’s do a part two of birthday cpns. part one is here incase you missed it ✌🏼
let’s start with this wardrobe match. xzs posted another set of photos and this time, xz is all dressed up. well it turns out it’s from the same brand/collection as what yibo wore at yh concert which is amiri. it’s kinda special cause that’s what he used to perform somebody else’s arms which i think is personal. and adding the cpn that the design on wyb’s side had WX on it.
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it’s like the tom ford thing ( among others ) all over again. granted that this is a good brand that they have used before but it’s so sus! do they have the same taste? lol. i imagine them talking about clothes and sharing what they think looks good on them. and personally, that collection had some v interesting pieces. so glad they get to wear stuff like this and not just plain black suits.
youtube
now we move on to yibo’s usual photoset related to exploring the unknown 🗺️. he does share personal photos he took from his time shooting for the past saturdays so we knew he will post today. fans have noticed that the number 33 ( gg’s age now ) is somehow incorporated.
his past posts only had one emoji or none. that’s how short and simple he is and we got used to that pattern. but for today, he had 9. and it’s 3 emojis reposted 3x. 33. when people also check this on weibo, it’s coming up as 33 characters. this exact combination. you can put in 9 other emojis that use the hand but it’s not 33. this may be a coincidence. you can say that there are lots of emojis because it’s the last weekend he is expressing his thanks.
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also, if you count all the photos/videos in sets he shared ever since he started it’s 33. not including the one posted today.
the universe is truly clowning us. 🤡🤡🤡
and oh, the photoset of wyb and xzs new photoshoot were posted a minute apart. did wyb miss the 16:23? or maybe he was really going for 16:24. I found an explanation here of what it means and it’s so sweet?!
The number 1624 represents love and romance. it can be explained in two ways: 1. Pinyin homophony: In Chinese, "one hundred sixty-two four" is harmonious to "all the way". the sound means smooth progress and smooth development on the road to love. therefore, some people will do it on the occasion of marriage proposal or anniversary.
Digit Split: Split the number, i.e. "1 6" and "24". "16" represents the meaning of "one heart and one mind". it means giving and serving wholeheartedly in love and "24" represents the hours of each day of your life. The number implies that the two of them will spend a whole life together. Day and night, we accompany each other and never leave.
some are also talking about the closed loop of yibo starting his bday with a photo in the desert. and then posting about it again on xz’s bday. 💛
it seems so similar to xz’s bday photoshoot before in a desert where he wore the GUCCI couple necklace. i don’t think i have to explain much, if you were there or read about it — you would know how chaotically sweet that year was.
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and the first emoji yibo used ✊🏻✊🏻✊🏻 is the same as the gestured they did in this photo ⬇️⬇️⬇️
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this photo too, maybe i’m wrong but when i saw it i was like — two sets of tableware? Is he on a date? lol. or maybe it’s the girlfriend fantasy they are serving here. you and gege on a date? HAHAHAHAHAHA!
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FINALLY, xz studio shared 18 photos for the first set. and 9 on the second. they could easily made it 18 + 18 cause that’s the max and i’m sure they have lots of photos. but no. it’s 18 + 9 = 27 which is yibo’s age.
PLEASE SHUT UP. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I honestly thought it was gonna be chill considering the kinds of cpns we picked up on part one. but this is kinda insane. lol. I think we will still get a video? the behind the scenes of the photoshoots ( hopefully ) and i’m excited to see it!!!!!!
END.
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thisgirlnamedblusy · 5 months ago
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hello! could you write about donna accidentally buying an asphoratic tea from a villager, and so when she brews and drinks it she becomes extremely aroused? she would become extremely flustered, but the reader eventually notices and helps donna with her “problem.”
also can you give her a g!p? thanks!
Yess!!! Thank you for your request!!! I hope you like it and sorry about the language mistakes!!! :))))
A curious "aftearnoon"
Pairing: Donna Beneviento x Fem! Reader
Warnings: G!P Donna, smut, Minors DNI, aphrodisiac tea
Word count: 4,445
Summary: Maybe that tea is not just a tea...
N/A: Sorry about the language mistakes!!! Requests are open!!! I'm waiting yours :))) I love you all!!!
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“How was the meeting?” You asked your girlfriend when she finally, after three long hours, walked through the door.
The woman in black, Donna Beneviento, shrugged as with a sigh, she pushed her veil away from her face so you could kiss her.
“I still can't get used to how good your kisses feel...” She whispered into your lips, with a shy smile, caressing your cheek.
Although it had been several months since you started a relationship with one of Mother Miranda's Lords, you could finally feel really comfortable with her.
Donna was a strange woman, tormented by her past, self-conscious about her face and her body. You never cared about those minutiae. You loved her almost since you met her. Blessed coincidences. Your relationship developed little by little and amid many difficulties, but some time ago it had completely stabilized, still putting aside your insecurities and showing the lady in black how good it felt when you had someone who loved you by your side.
“Well, I guess that's good,” you said amused, giving him another quick kiss.
“Why?” She asked curiously, with that innocence that made you melt.
“You know, Donna. Everything stops being exciting when you get used to it,” you explained, grabbing the lady by her waist and gently kissing her cheek, making her body tremble due to the contact.
“Well, then I hope I never get used to it...” Donna murmured, biting her lip, which made you blush.
“What's that?” You asked curiously, pointing to a paper bag the lady was carrying in her hand.
“Tea,” she answered, briefly, as always. You blinked several times, letting her understand that you needed a developed explanation. Poor Donna, she was still quite clumsy when it came to human relationships.
“Tea...” You repeated amused, pointing your head at the bag. She repeated the gesture, confused.
“Oh, well... Alcina recommended it to me at the last meeting so... I, I’ve stopped by the store and...”  The woman in black stammered. “I have, I have bought it…”
“Fine,” you said amused, getting closer to her ear. “Don't be nervous, Donna... It's not an interrogation,” you whispered, taking her hand and kissing it softly.
“If you had been away from me for so long I would ask you too,” she said, with a more serious tone.
“I know, I know...” You sighed, shaking your head.
“Do you want some?” She asked, displaying the bag and putting an end to that absurd conversation. You shook your head, placing a hand on your chest.
“Ugh, I think if I drink one more drop of tea I'll have a heart attack...” You said jokingly, moving out of the way of the Angie doll, who didn't seem to want to bother you that time. You knew how much she hated meetings with Mother Miranda. You couldn't blame her.
“I... I thought we could...” Donna said, a bit nervous. She probably interpreted those words of yours as a rejection, which you had to prevent.
“What I mean is that I don't want tea but... I'll be happy to accompany you, Donna,” you said, putting both hands on her shoulder to reassure her. The woman in black smiled satisfied and nodded.
“I'm going to make some,” she said, smiling and walking past you.
“I'll wait for you right here,” you said, winking at her.
After a few minutes, Donna sat across from you on the couch, in your little “tea and snuggles” corner. The aroma of that infusion was strange, but pleasant, like walking on a cloud, or at least that's the feeling it gave you.
“Well, so...” You said, leaning your back on the sofa and looking to have some conversation. “What evil deeds is the crow woman planning this time?”
“If she hears you talking about her like that...” Donna said, her voice dark. Fortunately, she had already gotten used to the little sympathy you had for Miranda.
“You would protect me, wouldn't you?” You asked amused, narrowing your eyes.
“With my own life, (Y/N),” Donna stated, taking a sip of her tea, tasting it slowly and giving her approval with a nod of her head. “Wow, it's delicious.”
“I'm glad to hear it,” you said, nodding, breathing in the sweet aroma of the drink. “Did Alcina recommend it to you?”
“Yes, well... She told me that I should try it,” Donna said with a soft voice. “The next time I see my sister I guess I will thank her.”
“You were with her an hour ago,” you commented, sighing and leaning back on the couch. She suddenly shook her head.
“No, she has not come to the meeting this time.”
“She hasn’t? Human blood overdose?” You joked, raising your eyebrows. Donna laughed sheepishly, setting the cup down.
“Apparently she was very entertained with her new maid,” the woman in black explained, softening her expression and blushing.
“Oh, I understand…” You mumbled, rolling your eyes.
“I don’t”
“You don’t? Why do you say so?” You asked curiously, at your girlfriend's unexpected response.
“People seem to be obsessed with sex,” Donna commented, blushing again.
“Well, people usually like sex,” you said, holding back your laughter at her attitude. “You don’t like it? Because your screams last night said the opposite,” you said in a sensual voice.
“Don't say those things, (Y/N), you know I'm embarrassed...” Donna murmured, looking down. You laughed at her reaction and bit your lip.
“Oh, come on, Donna. It's just you and me here,” you whispered, feigning confidentiality.
“Besides, when I make love to you, I don't do it just for fun, I do it because I love you,” the woman in black explained, picking up the cup again and bringing it to her lips.
“I know. But there are people who... You know, they do it just for fun,”  you said, sitting up, interested in that conversation.
“That's very unromantic. It’s rude” Donna said, shaking her head and making a strange face, looking at her cup.
“Maybe you’re right...” You sighed with a smile, which she returned to you, confused. “Are you alright?”
“Oh, yes, yes. It's just… I'm a little hot,” she said, blinking repeatedly and running a hand over her forehead.
“Hot? We are in the middle of winter,” you said curiously, narrowing your eyes. Donna nodded, bringing her legs together, her breathing strangely heavy.
“Maybe, maybe the tea was too hot,” the doll maker murmured, shifting in the armchair uncomfortably and frowning.
You looked at her carefully. Something was definitely happening to her. It wasn't normal for Donna to avoid your gaze so much.
“Hey, you don't look good,” you said worriedly, standing up and running a hand over her forehead. “Donna, honey, you're sweating.”
“I'm fine,” she said abruptly, pushing your hand away. “It's nothing.”
A nervous breakdown? It seemed unlikely.
“Okay...” You murmured suspiciously, sitting back down on the couch, without taking your eyes off your girlfriend, who seemed increasingly nervous.
“What about you? I want, I mean, what...? What have you been doing?” She asked, clearing her throat, as if she were trying to distract herself. You stared at her again, trying to find an explanation for her strange behavior.
“Me? Bah, nothing interesting,” you said with a sigh, downplaying her nervous movements, fearing it was another crisis. “I've been doing a little cleaning. Seriously, the dust in this house is going to kill me. Oh, and I also tightened the screws on the bed. I'm surprised it hasn't fallen apart yet.”
“The, the bed... Screws,” Donna repeated, with serious difficulties speaking clearly. You nodded with raised eyebrows.
Her gaze seemed lost, but in reality, oh no, it actually wasn't. You lowered your head to see where exactly her eye was landing. The answer almost makes you laugh.
“Donna,” you said, amused. She didn't react. “Hey, Donna,” you repeated, snapping your fingers to get her attention. The lady looked up, confused. “Were you looking at my tits?”
“What? No,” she said, shaking her head, continuing to move in the armchair.
“Oh, of course you were,” you said, amused, with an evil smile.
“No, I... Well, what if I was? I like your ti… Your breasts,” she said embarrassed, crossing her arms.
“I was just asking,” you whispered, winking at her knowingly.
She nodded nervously, looking for somewhere in that room to fix her gaze, somewhere that wasn't your body. You, determined not to give her a hard time, stood up slowly, studying her gestures. Her hands clenched the black fabric of her dress tightly.
“Hey, are you really okay? You're very...” You asked lovingly, lifting her chin.
Donna gasped, as if the mere act of your skin coming into contact with hers was like an electric current coursing through her body.
“I'm…. I'm fine...” She murmured, looking away again. You stopped, studying her nervous look.
“You're burning,” you commented, your hand on her forehead again. “Do you want me to prepare a bath for you? I'm sure it's good for you.”
“No, no... I... No, I don't need a hot bath...” Donna said, shaking her head again, squeezing the hands even harder on her dress.
“I didn't say it was a hot bath,” you said amused.
“Of course you did”
“Of course I didn’t. Hey, Donna, honey, tell me what's wrong,” you said with a more concerned tone, crouching down next to her and taking one of her hands so she would stop grabbing her dress. The lady in black bit her lip at the contact and looked at you, unable to utter a single word.
“I was thinking...” She whispered in a low voice, taking her hand away from yours and bringing it to your hair, playing with it in a strange way. “I like to see you like this”
You frowned, even more confused.
“Like that? What are you talking about?” You asked, caressing one of her legs affectionately.
Her hand traveled slowly to your face, passing over your cheeks and then over your mouth, caressing your lips gently with her finger.
“I wonder how good my dick would feel inside your mouth,” she whispered with a hoarse voice, making you stay glued to the floor with your eyes wide open.
“What?” You asked, surprised and amused at the same time. She closed her eye tightly and stood up from the couch, embarrassed by her unexpected words.
“I'm sorry, I didn't mean that,” she said, running away from you, who looked at her with curiosity and some excitement at that rudeness.
“Oh, but you said it...” You purred, sitting up and putting a hand on her shoulder.
“Non l'ho detto,” she whispered softly, running one hand over her forehead while the other kept you away from her.
“You have, Donna,” you said mischievously. “What is it that…? Oh, wow...” You were speechless when your gaze lowered further, being able to make out the growing bulge under her dress. “Well, well, Donna…”
“I don't know what's wrong with me, (Y/N),” she finally said, playing with the black fabric to hide her erection. “I'm... I, I’m feeling...”
“Has the conversation excited you? I knew you were sensitive, but not that much,” you said, amused and worried at the same time. She shook her head, putting both hands between her legs to hide her embarrassment.
“No, I... Suddenly I got very hot and I looked at you and... No, I can't stop...” Donna stammered nervously, closing her eye to avoid looking at you.
“Come on. It's okay, Donna...” You said with an understanding voice, beginning to suspect that it wasn't a coincidence. Normally Donna controlled her arousal very well but this time she seemed unable to do so.
You scratched the back of your neck, thinking about the reason, the factor that could have caused that. Your eyes traveled to the table, where the empty cup of tea rested.
“Wait a moment,” you said, picking up the cup and looking at the dregs it had left behind, smelling them carefully. “This tea…”
“The tea?” The lady in black asked, approaching and taking the cup from your hands.
You, who didn't take long to realize what was happening, couldn't contain your laughter, which, as expected, made Donna deeply angry.
“Can I know where the fun is? It's not funny, I... It, it doesn't go down...” The lady in black protested, looking at you offended.
“And I don't think it'll go down, darling,” you laughed, picking up the cup again. “See this? It's an aphrodisiac. I should have realized it as soon as I smelled it.”
“An aphrodisiac?” The lady in black asked.
“Yes. An aphrodisiac is…” You began to explain.
“I know what an aphrodisiac is,” Donna interrupted with a stern tone. “I’m not a fool.”
“I didn't say you were,” you said, leaving the cup on the table and putting your hands in surrender. “I think Alcina played with you, huh?”
“But I don't...” Donna stammered, huffing and raising a hand to her forehead. “Maledizione!”
“Well, well, it's not that bad...” You said, massaging her shoulders to make her relax, trying not to make fun of poor Donna anymore.
“Isn't that bad? You know how…? How hard it is?” She asked, turning suddenly and looking down at the bulge in her dress.
“I see,” you said, lowering your tone, with a dangerous gleam in your eyes, lowering your hand down her chest until you reached exactly where you wanted, making Donna step back when she noticed your hand right there. “Relax. I'm sure we can solve this.”
“I don't know how,” Donna murmured, gasping with pleasure at your naughty caresses, which gently ran over her erection. “(Y/N), I... Your hand...”
“You like that?” You asked in her ear, making her cock tremble in your hand, eager to get out. “Come on, my love, let me help you.”
“Help me...” Donna moaned involuntarily as your caresses increased in intensity, making her entire body tremble. “Gods, (Y/N) your caresses are... I feel them... Much more...”
“Oh, that's good...” You purred, taking her hand and leading her back to the armchair, sitting her on it with a gentle push. “Let me help you with that, huh?”
“Please, please...” The woman in black asked you, ashamed of having to do it. “I can't stand it, it almost, it almost hurts...”
“Shhh, calm down... I'll take care of you, right?” You whispered, approaching her lips and kissing them slowly, letting those overwhelming sensations make her tremble.
With the same gentleness, you climbed on top of her, with your legs on either side of her hips, making contact with her erection, which caused an involuntary moan from the brunette, who began to move to increase the friction.
“Don't make me suffer...” She sighed, burying her head in your chest and lowering your hips even further. You gasped from the contact, and from your girlfriend's slightly uninhibited attitude.
Donna used to be extremely romantic and cautious when it came to being intimate. That affection, those kisses and that delicate way of treating you drove you crazy but seeing her that way, terribly excited and anxious, sent a sudden moisture between your legs.
“Tell me how you want me to solve this problem, Donna...” You whispered in her ear, letting her hands squeeze your breasts until they were out of your dress and her hot mouth took care of your neck, never stopping rubbing against you, not even a moment.
“I don't know...” Donna murmured, pulling hard on the buttons of your dress, making them fly through the room. You laughed, unbuttoning hers, feeling her extremely hot skin against yours.
“I can use my hands, my mouth, my body... I'll do whatever you ask me, honey... I want to take care of you...” You whispered tenderly, biting her earlobe. She pulled back for a moment, looking at you with a bright, anxious eye.
“I want... I want...” She murmured between gasps as you took advantage of that moment to remove the sleeves of her dress and carefully lowered it, releasing her eager erection with a gasp of relief from the woman in black.
Your hand grabbed the trembling length and began to massage it carefully, taking your time to see the great effect that tea had on Donna. The woman in black moaned at your gentle up and down movements.
“You're so hard, tesoro,” you murmured, knowing that it would only excite her more. She closed her eye, ashamed. “Mm,” you moaned, staying for a moment on the tip that was already beginning to shine. “Come on. Tell me what you want…”
“I want...” Donna gasped, joining her hand to yours, increasing the pressure on her penis, forcing you to stay there. “Cazzo, (Y/N), I want… Voglio la tua bocca…” She finally said with a broken voice, joining the movement of her hips to your hand.
“You want it? You want my mouth on your...?” You murmured, removing your hand and placing soft kisses on her hot skin, burning with desire.
“Yes, (Y/N), I want it, now...” She said with a stern tone, pulling your hair lightly so you could look at her face.
“How impatient...” You joked, kissing her quickly and descending little by little under her completely lost gaze, blinded by desire. You had never seen her that way and it didn't bother you at all. You should thank Alcina…
You knelt on the wooden floor, rubbing her legs as you kissed them, making the wait unbearable, making her moan in discomfort while she herself began to massage her erection.
“That's cheating, my love...” You said jokingly, resting your head on her lap as her movements grew in intensity.
“Well then stop... Stop playing with me and...” Donna gasped nervously, masturbating without any qualms. The sight before you was exciting, but you weren't going to let her do it anymore.
“No hands, Donna,” you said, grabbing her wrists and placing them on either side of her hips. “I told you I would take care of this.”
“Hurry up, (Y/N)... It hurts...” She protested, with a slightly innocent tone, writhing on the couch.
“Calm down...” You whispered before leaning and kissing the glistening tip slowly, enjoying the taste of her arousal as one of your hands grabbed it to keep her lenght right where you wanted it.
“Gods... Your kisses are...” Donna gasped, increasing the friction with desperate movements of her hips.
You smiled as, little by little, you went down, surrounding her erection with your lips and moving your tongue slowly, not leaving an inch of skin unlicked. Her hand rested on your head, making you hold on, not daring to stop surrounding her, hugging her with your mouth.
Your hand began to move too, picking up a harmonious rhythm along with your mouth, slurping, licking and kissing all the arousal out of her. Her moans increased, without a trace of her usual shyness, grunting as your tongue ran over the tip before going down again slowly, unhurriedly, but increasingly intense.
That exciting situation caused you to moan against her skin, making her entire body start to shake.
“(Y/N) no... Don't stop now... I...” Donna stammered, gripping your hair tighter, making your speed increase before, with a muffled moan, her hips ground against your body and you noticed how heat flooded your mouth. “Oh, Gods, I, I'm so sorry...”
Her apology made you raise your eyebrows and laugh in amusement, wiping away the remains her seed had left in your corners, resting your head on her lap.
“Don't apologize, Donna...” You purred, climbing on top of her again and kissing her tenderly and warmly, heat that began to become unbearable for you. “I love your flavor…”
Those obscene words made her laugh nervously, tasting herself in your mouth, with her hands hugging your half-naked body, with her kisses becoming wild again.
“Are you feeling better, honey?” You asked tenderly, studying her still confused expression, even with that sparkle in her eye. She looked around for something to look at, as if she were terribly embarrassed by what had just happened.
“No,” she said, sighing, grabbing your face in her hands and kissing you in a messy manner. You laughed, lowering your hand to corroborate her words. Her erection had gone down for a moment, but didn't take long for it to rise again, making you look at her, biting your lips.
“Wow... I had never seen this before,” you commented amused, caressing her hard penis again, maybe less hard, but hard nonetheless.
“That damn tea...” Donna muttered, caressing your back erratically. “I want more, (Y/N)”
“More tea?” You teased, kissing her neck and unhooking her bra skillfully and discreetly, running your hand across her bare chest, making her moan again.
“No. I want more of you,” she said with a serious tone, pushing you so she could grab you by the legs and lift you up with a strength you had rarely seen.
You held onto her waist with your legs as she carried you to the other couch, letting you fall onto it as she got rid of the rest of her clothes.
“Don't make me wait, Donna...” You said putting on a good girl's face as you pulled down your underwear, throwing it to the other side of the room. When your hand reached the fabric of your dress, hers held you back from taking it off. Her eye continued to shine with hunger and desire as she positioned herself between your legs, pressing your wetness with her erection.
“Don't take it off...” She whispered in your ear. “I like to see you like this… Helpless…”
“Who are you? What have you done with Donna?” You asked jokingly, pleased by Lady Beneviento's lack of self-control.
“Shut up...” She said, holding your chin firmly in her hands. “I want… I need to fill you, (Y/N)... I need it so bad…”
“I know, honey...” You said in an understanding tone, knowing that it was the tea that was talking and not Donna, or at least the part of her that you knew. That slightly more dominant side of your girlfriend was quite funny.
“I can't take it anymore...” She growled as, with a small movement, she entered you without warning, making you moan in surprise, but pleased, very pleased.
“Oh, Donna...” You moaned, closing your eyes to help your body get used to her size.
She moaned too, grabbing your legs and starting to move slowly, enjoying like never before the feeling of your body hugging her erection, wanting to feel the slightest movement, the hug with which your walls worshiped her body.
“So... Tight...” The lady whispered, in a low tone, probably thinking you hadn't heard her. She was so clouded and distracted by her desire that she didn't realize that you were enjoying each one of those words.
“Just for you, Donna...” You said in a seductive tone, matching her slow movements with your hips, feeling how your moisture ran through her body, how yours fought to keep her dick from leaving it.
“Just for me...” She repeated, stopping for a moment, probably to not get carried away by desire, by that cursed tea. “I can barely… I can barely move… It hugs me so well…”
“Move, Donna... I need it,” you moaned when her movements were barely perceptible. Your body quickly adjusted to the intruder and your arousal helped it to slide easily as her thrusts resumed.
The obscene sound of your humidity and almost desperate moans began to be the soundtrack of that room. Donna seemed impatient, overcome by the pleasure she was feeling, that she was making you feel.
You scratched her back, arching your body involuntarily and stealing a kiss whenever you could, to which she smiled contentedly. At no point would you let that tea blur the love you felt for her, the love she felt for you.
The doll maker caressed your legs, slowly raising them and grabbing them over her shoulder, moving her hips gracefully, knowing that your bodies couldn't be separated, didn't want to be separated.
“Donna... I'm so close...” You moaned, biting your knuckles to contain your excitement. She smiled and closed her eyes, intensifying her thrusts. The tremors of her erection inside you told you that she wasn't far from her second release either.
“Turn around,” she said, pulling out of you before a wave of heat washed over you. “Turn around, please…”
You looked at her hungrily, moaning at the lack of her body in yours, but you obeyed. She raised your hips slightly, exposing you in a terribly arousing way and entering you again with a guttural moan.
“Just like that, just like that, tesoro... You’re taking me so well...” She moaned, bending down to insert her dick deeper, as far as it could. You couldn't stand it and it didn't take long for you to tense your body, making your muscles squeeze Donna even more, who gasped from the shock, letting herself be placed on your back while she filled you with her heat.
You both stayed in that position for a few moments. Donna rested her head on your back, still not leaving you, enjoying the feeling of her wetness on your body, not letting it to come out.
Her breathing was now more normal and the pressure inside you decreased enough to realize that the effect of that tea had ended, fortunately, or rather, unfortunately...
“Donna...” You sighed, realizing that her body was trembling against yours. Carefully, you turned around. Lady Beneviento was unable to look you in the eyes, embarrassed by her actions. “Hey, Donna…”
“I'm so sorry...” She whispered into your chest, pulling out of you and hugging you tightly. “I'm sorry, cara mia...”
“Why are you sorry?” You asked, gently stroking her black hair, playing with it with your fingers. “It seems that you are feeling better now…”
“Yes, I... No, I haven't treated you well,” she said with a tone of regret, letting you hug her tenderly, giving her the warmth that was now missing from her body.
“Are you kidding me? I had a great time,” you said with a smile. She looked up for a moment, but looked down again, embarrassed.
“I, I felt... I was so... I couldn't think clearly,” she said, apologizing again, her body shivering from the sudden cold.
“It wasn't your fault, I know you're not like that, Donna,” You said with a reassuring tone. “Besides, I liked it. It has been... Different.”
“Alcina...” She hissed with a dark voice, snuggling closer to your body, letting your hug comfort her.
“It doesn't matter, Donna, really...” you whispered, patting her back. “Hey…”
“What?” She asked curious.
“Can I have some tea?”
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another-goblin · 2 months ago
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Doc and Gambler: An essay A disjointed musing
I've been thinking about the words they use to address or refer to each other. Gambler and Doctor are rather special nicknames. I can't think of other characters who talk to each other a lot but avoid calling each other by actual names so deliberately.
First of all, of course I can see it as a sign of their relationship. They are old friends, so it makes sense that they have cute special names for each other.
Can there be other explanations?
1. We never see them use each other's actual first names.
It's understandable with Aventurine. If he's ever comfortable being called Kakavasha, it's definitely not now. And I can understand if he'd prefer Kakavasha to just remain a happy, innocent child in his memories forever.
It's more interesting with Ratio. Nobody calls him just "Veritas" (I think?..) He's referred to as Veritas Ratio in some official situations in his character stories. Even his elderly professor, who talks about teaching Ratio when he was a child, only calls him "Ratio."
Actually, I remember a theory that "Veritas" isn't a personal name but a kind of honorific. Maybe a title that Veritas University gives to its most distinguished members. But if Veritas is his actual first name, then I think it's quite significant that nobody seems to call him that. Especially while all of the other characters who have identifiable western-style first and second names are mostly referred to by their first name. (I'm sorry, I don't know how the Xianzhou characters' names work.)
A little off topic, but is Ratio even his real name? According to the wiki, his full name means "truth of the matter," and his Chinese name means "doctor truth." What a coincidence that a person with such a name became a famous scientist. Although there can be other explanations too.
2. They do use each other's more commonly used names sometimes (I think Ratio called him Aventurine once in the game when discussing him with us, and Aventurine addressed Ratio by name a couple of times). But it's mostly nicknames. Mostly Doc(tor) and Gambler, but also "learned professor," "knowledgeable friend," and a hundred of silly ways Ratio refers to Aventurine. I made a whole post about it long ago.
3. Can it be because all of their direct interaction happened in Penacony, in the middle of a murder mystery somewhat reminiscent of the board game Clue, with our little "Mrs. Peacock" and "Professor Plum" here just imitating the naming conventions of such a game? Like archetypes from a classical detective story, where most characters can be described with one word like that. But it's a bit of a crack theory.
4. The only situation we saw them talking to each other was when they had to play their roles for Sunday.
It's interesting that Sunday later proceeds to call Ratio just "doctor" or "learned doctor" too, the way Aventurine did. I mean, strictly speaking, there isn't anything unusual in calling a doctor "doctor", but it's funny in an awkward way. Imagine two close friends having special names for each other. And then a complete stranger who's been eavesdropping starts using these names too. Umm, that's "Dr. Ratio", Mr. Sunday, thank you very much.
Btw, that's another point to the theory that Sunday only knows (and tries to use against them) the things they deliberately fed him through their conversations.
So it might be that they did it deliberately for Sunday to hear. Like, see? we are so not friends that we don't even call each other by name. But then we see them using similar words when mentioning each other while talking to other people, and in Aventurine's thoughts too (in mission descriptions during Double Indemnity).
5. Although it might still be the way for them to try and distance themselves from each other, at least verbally, trying to deny the obvious special connection between them.
6. Or maybe it's about their "masks". They both have public personas to hide their real selves behind. (Ratio directly tells us about it and wears a literal mask to hide behind, and Aventurine's whole Harmony ordeal was basically to show his inner self, so unlike the confident and cocky Aventurine other people know.)
But they know each other better and see deeper than just their public personas of "Aventurine" and "Dr. Ratio". And it's still too early in their relationship to prod deeper ("Kakavasha" and "Veritas"). So a secret third thing it is.
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wordsarelife · 1 month ago
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⛧༺ NO BODY, NO CRIME ༻⛧
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EPISODE 04: somebody’s gotta catch him out
pairing: theo nott x potter!reader
summary: bonding with hermione, theo tells you the truth and new theories come up..
warnings: extremely big trigger warning for the whole series, in this chapter: mentions of murder, illegal activities, grooming
note: welcome back to the fourth episode of nbnc! i’m so excited to have you all back and to hear your opinions on this weeks episode!!
and because i’m not a monster and know that you guys are patiently waiting for the ball chapter, the next episode will be out either thursday or friday, depending on when i get to finish it!!
you had fallen asleep around 4 am, repeated thoughts about burbages murder and theo’s letter plaguing your mind. the night had been awful, sleep only ever granting you a few minutes of calmness, until you shot up, another thought in your head.
you still felt uneasy when you got dressed before sunrise. hermione was still asleep when you got up, which honestly said a lot. 
you didn’t want to risk, running into theo during breakfast, so you walked to the great hall as soon as it opened, ready for students to eat. you couldn’t concentrate. the loneliness of the morning only fueling your thoughts. 
some part of you just couldn’t believe theo really was the type of person to do something like that. he was so different from every slytherin you had ever met and him being the killer seemed so unlikely. 
at the same time many things made sense now. you thought about monday evening. theo had been late to dinner, just like professor burbage. they had strolled in only minutes apart. and while theo barely looked at her, professor burbage hadn’t been able to stop glancing at him. she had been nervous and scared. maybe theo had been the reason for that. 
he had been at the astronomy tower just minutes before you had found the womans body. he never offered a real explanation for his presence, only saying he hadn’t meant to disturb you. but what was the truth? could all of this really be coincidences? how many could there be before they stopped feeling like chance?
had you been so wrong about him? so terribly wrong? 
when you left the great hall, you almost ran into hermione, who silently commented you strange behaviour with a quirk of her brow. 
“i’m going to the library” you quickly muttered, not allowing her to say anything before you continued your fast pace. 
hermione stared after you in disbelief, before she abandoning her original plan for breakfast (which was nothing like her, because she was a great believer in breakfast being the most important meal of the day) and followed you. 
to both of your surprise you really ended up in the library. you had walked inside the room by accident, but quickly decided to do some research if you were there already. you had often enough watched hermione do it, it couldn’t be that hard. 
you only noticed her presence when you were in the third row. “hermione” you gasped, pressing a hand to your chest as you tried to calm the beat of your heart. 
hermione was not even fazed by your reaction. “you’re acting strange” she noted, a look of disbelief flying over you, as your hand wandered along the row of books in the shelf. “i have never seen you pick up a book from here that wasn’t fiction” 
“i—“ you tried answering something but were at a loss for words. 
“what’s going on?” hermione crossed her arms, sending you one of her typical strict looks. “the truth, please”
you sighed, knowing it was to no use to lie to her. “it’s theo” you said finally. 
hermione searched your face for a hint of emotion, for something to tell her what was bothering you about the boy. your expression remained stoic and unreadable, even for her.
you sighed, before you sat down at the desk in the middle of the two shelves. hermione followed your movement and sat down next to you. you turned your head to look at her. and then you told her absolutely everything. from what you had found out in burbages office (which hermione interrupted, lecturing you) to the kiss and finally the letter theo had send burbage. 
when you had finished, you were keeping your eyes on your fidgeting hands, ashamed and afraid of hermione’s reaction. there were a few seconds of silence, which you spend wondering how fast she would get up and tell your brother everything you had just admitted to her. 
instead, she grabbed your hands with her own, making you look up in surprise. 
“it’s going to be okay” she assured with a calm voice. she smiled at you softly. “you’re not alone” 
“but theo—” you muttered “what if he really..?” you couldn’t even say it. 
hermione shook her head. “he didn’t” 
“what?” you asked, confused, unsure if you had heard her right. “how can you be so sure?”
“well” hermione smiled mysteriously. she stood up and studied the shelf for a few seconds, before she grabbed a thick book, throwing it down between you. she began turning pages, while she explained. “the smell of the poison you described, you said it was a mix of burnt herbs and something metallic” 
she skipped the pages, past liquid luck and into the more advanced section. “i only ever encountered one potion that was described to smell like that. theo is absolutely smart enough to brew that, that’s for sure” your hope sank. “but” she noted, pressing her finger down on the page, seemingly having found what she was looking for. “mors fumes is a binding potion” she looked at you with a smile. 
“which means..?” you drawled, unsure what she was telling you. 
“it means that the potion binds itself to the person” she explained. “that timeframe has to be atleast six hours before the person drinks it to have any effect. it matters when she drank it, because she must’ve received the bottle atleast six hours before that. the poison works fast. burbage died around ten, right?”
you nodded and hermione’s smile grew even bigger. 
“that means she drank the wine at around half past ten.” she calculated in her head, before she continued. “so she received the bottle between three and half past four.”
“but couldn’t she have received it a day before or something? wouldn’t that work too? more than six hours?”
“no” hermione shook her head, before she aggressively pointed down on the page again. “mors fumes is shortlived. it can only survive in it’s measured timeframe. it could’ve been brewed whenever and over weeks or days, dependent on the wizards time to brew. but as soon as it’s hexed, the six hour timer starts. after that you only have four hours to use it until it’s worthless, so considering it still worked, it could’ve only been given to burbage during that timeframe”
“wow hermione” you almost couldn’t comprehend how your best friends mind worked so effortlessly and precisely. “that’s honestly amazing, but sadly i have no idea where theo was between three and half past four that day, so it changes nothing” you sank you head into your hands, frustration taking over. 
“of course you don’t” hermione muttered, rolling her eyes. “but i do”
“you do?” you were ready to jump out of your seat and plaster her face with kisses. “how?”
“how often did i tell you to visit the library?” hermione asked, raising her brows. 
“so theo was in the library? the whole time?” you asked hopefully. “and he didn’t leave for some time?”
“he was here the entire time i was” hermione nodded. “from two until half past five. he didn’t leave. he sat two seats from me, i would’ve noticed.”
“not even to, you know, go to the bathroom?”
“no” she shook her head. “he definetly drinks way too little, you should tell him that by the way” 
“oh, hermione” you almost cried, as you leaped over the table, throwing your arms around her body and messing up her curls. “you’re amazing, seriously” 
“i can’t let you run around suspecting the wrong people” she muttered into your hair. “and i can’t let you run around suspecting theo. he might be a slytherin, but he’s better than all of them”
“i know” you nodded, sitting back down and quickly freeing your face from a few stray tears. “but i’m still angry with him”
“of course” hermione nodded. “he should’ve told you about the letter and his whole relationship to burbage, considering his weird remarks. you definitely should ask him about that. just because he didn’t kill her doesn't mean he didn’t do anything wrong”
“yeah, i will” you nodded. she was right with everything she had said. you just didn’t know why theo felt the need to lie to you, if he hadn’t killed the professor. you had sworn to work together, that would only work as long as you could trust each other. 
“and all of this..” you muttered, pointing in the air between you. 
“stays between us” hermione assured. “no word to the boys, just like i promised, as long as you stay safe”
“thank you” you smiled, thanking her for nothing defined and everything all at once.
“always” hermione promised, before she got up, excusing herself to go to breakfast. despite having just eaten yourself, you decided to accompany her. confronting theo could wait a bit longer and hermione was glad about the company, was she always lonely breakfasting so early during the holidays. 
it was actually quite wholesome for hermione and you to get some time alone. you had the chance to catch up and discuss topics you normally wouldn’t when harry and ron were sitting with you. 
hermione was not in a rush like she usually was, enjoying your time together, and you felt a bit bad, that you had focused so much on theo and only relied on her when things got difficult. hermione assured you that you didn’t have to worry about it considering she was working most of the time and also most efficiently when she did it alone. 
still, she was there whenever you needed her and you promised the same. 
after an hour, you were joined by harry and Ron, who strolled into the hall behind neville and ginny, who were in deep conversation. you could see that harry was trying to catch what they were talking about, while ron talked your brother's ear off at the same time.
theo came to breakfast at nine and made obvious gestures for you to follow him outside around ten. you quickly excused yourself from the table and followed the boy. harry and ron reacted confused at your sudden urge to leave, while neville and ginny both waved at you and hermione send a smile.
ron quickly concentrated on his food again, but harry kept an eye on the entry of the hall, peeking around hermione, and saw you drag theodore nott down the hallway behind you. 
“she’s not honestly—“ he muttered, while he made a move to get up and follow you. hermione stopped him before he could do so. 
“calm down, harry” she said. “she has to ask him something about their final project, she couldn’t sleep last night, wondering if she had forgotten something important.” hermione effortlessly lied.
“hermione” harry muttered sternly. “there’s just been a murder and the slytherins—“
“—are just as suspicious as anybody else” hermione finished. “don’t get your knickers in a twist. she has her wand, she’s fine” 
“she could’ve at least discuss whatever she had to in here. nott was sitting at his table the entire time”
“discuss a mistake in a potions project next to draco malfoy, really harry?”
harry muttered something neither ron nor hermione could understand, before he picked up his toast and bit into the strawberry jam atop it. 
you had gripped theo’s arm, before he had been able to say something, dragging him down the hall behind you, until you reached an empty classroom. you let go of his arm, like it was on fire. 
“ow” theo muttered, rubbing his skin. “you have a hard grip, sparrow”
“no, don’t call me that” you crossed your arms, leaning your back against the wall. “not after you did nothing but lie to me”
“lie to you?” theo repeated confused. “i never—“ 
“sure you didn’t” you spat, throwing the letter, you had kept in your pocket, at him. 
all colour drained from theo’s face in a second. he didn’t even have to look at the paper, he knew what it was immediately, which did not help his case.
“i swear this isn’t what it looks like” he muttered, picking it up and scanning the lines of his own writing. 
“i bet it isn’t” you nodded sarcastically. “for a few hours i really thought you were the killer”
“i? i would never—“
“you can be glad hermione cleared that up or this conversation would be a lot more physical”
theo seemed like he had temporarily forgotten the topic of said conversation as he looked at you, a dirty smile on his face. 
you send him a deadpan look and he quickly remembered the severity of the situation. “oh” he muttered “you mean..”
“yeah” you nodded. “i would’ve bashed your head in”
theo’s eyes quickly fell on the paper again, not daring you to make your statement reality. 
“i’m ready for a good explanation” you encouraged, as he continued to stay quiet. 
“it’s not as easy” theo muttered, averting his eyes and trying to find a spot in the room he could focus on. 
“theo” you muttered, a bit softer now. “you threatened a teacher and told her to meet you on the evening of her murder, i don’t have to tell you how it looks” 
“yeah, i’m sorry.” theo whispered and if you weren’t mistaken, you noticed tears in his eyes. “i never meant to drag you into this”
“drag me into what?” you stepped closer, forcing him to look at you, tears now clearly rolling over his cheeks. “you’re scaring me, theo” 
maybe there really was a good explanation for all of this, but right now you just hoped theo hadn’t murder-in-the-orient-express-ed professor burbage.
“okay” he finally said. “i’ll tell you, everything, but you have to listen until the end”
you nodded, waiting for him to begin his story.
“it all began two years ago. that’s when i had to take muggle studies, because i had too few subjects. professor burbage was amazing. she was attentive to all of her students and over all a great teacher” he smiled upon the memory, before it quickly evolved into a frown. “but then she asked me to stay back one day after class. she made a few comments i found unsettling, but decided to forget about. maybe i had understood her wrong, she surely hadn’t meant it like that.”
you looked to the ground, not liking in which direction his story went. you felt sorry for the way you had treated him. for how you had spoken about burbage like she had been a saint, how judgemental you had been when theo had disagreed. 
“she passed me notes during class when no one was looking. she asked me to stay back more often. she made obvious advances. and she continued and didn’t stop until i couldn’t excuse it anymore. until i reached a point where i understood that i hadn’t been the one who had gotten the wrong idea, she was. she read into the things i did, not the other way around”
tears spilled over his cheeks quicker than before, but he did not falter, as he continued to speak, his voice trembling through both of your crying. 
“then, one day after class, she tried to kiss me” 
your breath hitched, waiting for him to continue. 
he shook his head. “i stopped her and rushed out of the room. i was too scared to tell on her, but i went to dumbledore and requested to drop the course because of personal reasons. i had enough luck never to be caught with her alone again for the rest of the year”
you thought about everything he had just told you. how someone you had respected was so different to the person she had shown everyone around her. you thought about theo, the fourteen year old version of him, who’s trust got betrayed so badly. fourteen year old theo, who had no one to tell about a teachers wrongdoing. fourteen year old theo, who had probably felt so alone. 
you stepped across the room and hugged him. the way he had calmed you, you were now trying to calm him. “you’re safe” you whispered softly. “you did nothing wrong, you didn’t deserve it”
you could feel him nod, as he buried his face in your hair. his body still spread warmth, it felt the same like yesterday in the closet, when your lips had connected. 
“i never told anyone” theo admitted. “you’re the first person”
“i’m sorry” you muttered, breaking the hug to look at him. “i shouldn't have made you”
“no” he shook his head. “i should’ve been honest from the beginning. i didn’t want anyone to know, i didn’t want you to know. i thought you might think i’m weak or less of a man”
“i would never think that, theo” you shook your head. “you’re not the person this information should damage. she was in the wrong, not you, you’re right the way that you are. i doesn’t matter what she did to you, it doesn’t change anything about you, you’re still the same to me”
theo nodded. “i wrote the letter out of frustration, not because i intended to kill her” he continued. “a few months ago dumbledore gave me something i had to deliver to burbage. when i came into her office, she was busy writing a note. i was able to read what she had written before she saw me”
“what was it?” you asked carefully. 
theo sighed, before he recalled the words from the top of his head. “your insights in class are so refreshing; i truly appreciate how you see things differently. can you stay behind after class today? i’d love to discuss some of your ideas further—just between us, of course. it’s important to me that this stays our little secret.”
“wow” you huffed disgusted. “what happened then?”
“i told her she should not be doing that” theo mumbled. “she agreed and i believed her. she had lied, i should’ve been more persistent”
“you’re not responsible for her actions, theo” 
“of course i am” he shook his head, fidgeting with your hand, he held in his own. “she tried the same with me, she was just able to do it again, because i never reported her, because i was too scared to admit what she had done to me” he breathed, his voice steady again. “and then after all, i just believed her, because it was easier than to admit that i had a responsibility for this child”
“it’s not your fault” you assured. he continued to shake his head. “it’s not your fault!” you repeated, louder, more firmly. 
“i only found out a few weeks ago that she hadn’t stopped like she had told me she would” theo said softly. “i don’t know who her victim was and it honestly didn’t matter, because then i wrote the letter. but the one you read wasn’t the first i sent. in the first i threatened to report her if she would not immediately resign and leave her position as a teacher, nothing happened so i send a second one, the letter you found. i gave her a last chance to do what i had told her, to resign and leave the castle as well as the poor kid she had used all this time. i didn’t want this to have any effect on them, so i only threatened to report and tell dumbledore about my own experience. i asked her to meet me so she could tell me about her decision"
“and?” you asked, interested to hear how the conversation had went. 
“she told me that she had resigned, like i had asked her” theo explained. “she asked me not to tell anyone about this and i agreed, because i honestly was not ready to tell someone myself. but i told her i would if i should find out about any of this happening again or if she would resume to a teaching position at a different school. she promised she wasn’t planning on doing that. and that was it. we split up and went to dinner”
“okay, but that would explain the note on the wine bottle burbage received: ‘consider this a parting gift’. that’s why she wasn’t suspicious before drinking it. it made perfect sense in the context of her resignation”
“yeah” theo nodded “i know that my involvement seems to make sense, y/n. i had reason enough to kill burbage, but i didn’t, please believe me, i’m not a bad person”
“you’re quite the opposite of a bad person, theodore nott” you shook your head, proudness flushing your whole body as you looked up at the brunette boy in front of you. “you did everything to make sure burbage could never hurt someone again. you had absolutely zero reason to kill her, considering she did everything you had asked her to and also, you possibly couldn’t have done it”
“i know, but how do you know that?” 
theo listened attentively as you told him everything hermione had told you. 
“that's incredible. and it reveals a time frame we can follow” he nodded. 
“exactly" you smiled, before your expression turned serious again "thank you for telling me all of this. i’m sorry for all of it, but i’m still glad you had a good reason to send such a letter”
“yeah, it probably looked pretty bad without context, now that i think about it” theo admitted. 
“but i do still have one question: was it really coincidence that you were at the astronomy tower too, right before burbage’s death?”
“yes and no” theo nodded. “it was a coincidence that i was there when she died, but i followed you on purpose”
“you followed me on purpose?” you repeated confused “but why?”
“because i wanted to talk to you” theo admitted, his voice steady yet vulnerable “i’ve been wanting to talk to you for a while now”
you raised an eyebrow, curiosity piqued “really? about what?”
he hesitated for a moment, searching your eyes as if weighing his words. “i’ve fancied you for a long time, you know?”
your heart skipped a beat, surprise flooding through you. “you fancied me? me?”
theo laughed, the sheer disbelief on your face amusing him. “how couldn’t i?” he replied with a playful grin, his eyes sparkling “you’re smart, you’re fierce, and you don’t take any nonsense from anyone. plus, the way you stand up for your friends? it’s impossible not to notice. it’s honestly quite entertaining to watch draco and you fight”
you grinned, somewhat proud someone had taken an interest in your debates with malfoy. you always made sure to be ready to break him. “who do you think wins?” you asked, a brow quirked. 
“you, of course” theo smirked. “draco is not half as good. it’s honestly amazing how good you are at telling him off” 
“you’re making me blush” you smiled, as you stared up at him. “i always liked you most, you know? out of all of them. you were so nice every time i encountered you and i think i really took a liking to you during our project”
now it was theo’s turn to smile proudly. “so, are we good again?” he asked softly, waiting for you to make a decision. 
you nodded, mirroring his expression. “we are” you assured, before you reached for his neck, connecting you lips with his for a short peck. 
when you pulled back, theo grinned at you with a lopsided grin, his worries fading away as his eyes wandered over your face. 
the next thing to do, you had decided, was to wait for mattheo’s invitation to reveal the infos you needed to find the masquerade ball of the nocturne society. someone there would probably know more. 
that led to your next problem: the right clothing. theo suggested to make a trip to hogsmeade, which you quickly noticed to be impossible because of the storm. that’s when you remembered the convenience of the room of requirement. you had always used it the year before, so it had become manageable for you to find. 
theo walked next to you through the halls cluelessly, ready to follow your lead. 
“so, motives” you muttered, looking at him. “who would’ve had an interest in killing burbage?”
“someone who was after the artifact?” theo suggested. 
“not impossible” you shrugged. “maybe that was the only way to steal it. maybe she had hexed it and there was no other way than to kill her.”
“but that would mean that whoever was trying to get access to the artifact also knew about burbage’s resignation” theo noted, he thought for a few seconds, before he added. “so far, the only people who know about it are you and me and of course dumbledore and maybe also mcgonagall.”
“i don’t think that will lead us far, theo” you remarked softly. “we don’t know who burbage might’ve told. she was thinking about if for some time. i mean, remember your first letter? that was months ago. she could’ve told people as far as we know”
“you’re right” theo nodded. “so back to the beginning, if we exclude the artifact for now, what else could’ve been a reason to kill her?”
silence errupted between you as both of you thought about the question. 
your breath hitched. “what if it’s unrelated? what if someone found out?”
“about?” theo quirked a brow, not able to follow your stream of thoughts. 
“her inappropriate relation to a student” you explained. “i mean think about it. you found out, how unlikely is it that someone else did?”
“not unlikely at all” theo nodded. “it wasn’t even hard to uncover. i mean, if someone was just a student in her class, they could’ve easily picked up something”
“i’m not trying to make you uncomfortable, so tell me if we should stop talking about it, but—“
“it’s fine, sparrow” theo said honestly. “i can take it”
“okay” you nodded, before you continued. “if we assume that she had a preferred age, fourteen, like you were, then maybe the killer is not an unrelated student, maybe it’s someone who didn’t witness the relationship first hand during class, but someone who knew her victim” you explained. “someone, who would go to lengths to protect that kid, someone who wanted to take revenge”
“a sibling” theo breathed. 
“exactly” you nodded. “i would kill for my brother, no questions asked. we just have to find someone who would do the same”
you both dwelled on the thought as you walked around a corner, the doors of the room of requirement welcoming you as if they had waited ages for your arrival. 
“what about this?” you held a blue dress against your body, twirling from side to side for theo to inspect it. 
“beautiful” theo complimented, before he scrunched his nose. “but too blue. most members of the society will be slytherins, remember?”
“how can you be so sure about that?” you questioned, putting the dress to the side and picking up a dark green, almost black mask and holding it in front of your eyes. 
“well, it’s illegal and dangerous and—“ theo grinned “—have i already said illegal?” 
you shook your head, throwing a similiar mask like yours in his direction. theo caught the thing with ease, wiggling his eyesbrows as he held it in front of his eyes. 
“you recognize me, sparrow?” 
“your smile is uncanny” you giggled, holding a hand up to hide his mouth. “maybe you should just wear a whole bag” 
“well, your options don’t seem the most practical to guarantee a fast escape. i mean can you even run in these shoes?”
“i’m not running” you crossed your arms, raising your nose. “i’m a lady, theo” 
“of course” theo shook his head, before his gaze dropped to a beautiful emerald green ballgown underneath part of his tuxedo. “wait” he muttered, holding the dress up against your body. “this is the one”
your smile grew bigger as you took in the gorgeous dress. it was made up of a thin lace fabric, adorned with highlights of shimmering ivy. as you put it on, it was clothing your body beautifully, fitting like it had been made for you (that were the perks regarding magical clothing; they fully took on the form of the person wearing them, clinging to every curve of your body). 
“wow” theo muttered when you stepped around the shelf you had changed behind.
your cheeks grew rosy, glancing up and down his body, admiring how well the tuxedo fit him. “you look very much wow yourself, mr nott” 
he laughed, shaking his head like he wasn’t believing one word of what you were saying. “it’s time” he grabbed both of your masks and the note mattheo had given you, that was now slowly revealing letters. one after the other until more and more words were forming. 
moonlit atrium, it read, portrait of the lonely witches daughter, in the dungeon
luckily, theo read the words with a hint of recognition in his eyes. you would’ve been completely lost without him, probably strolling through the halls, desperately searching for a portrait admist thousands. you would’ve never made it in time. 
“come on, my lady” he watched you fasten your mask around your head, looking into the corridor to check for people, before he took your hand in his, leading you to the nereast stairs down to the dungeon. 
the air grew cold around you as you walked down, the chilly setting of the hogwarts dungeon making it's presence known and casting your body in goosebumps. theo didn’t let go of your hand for one second, squeezing it to reassure you anytime you would cross a dark hallway that send shivers down your spine. 
finally, theo started walking slower in a particularly dark corridor. his eyes wandered along the walls, searching for the familiar portrait, before his gaze locked onto the artwork. 
you were searching the wall opposite from theo, when a hand reached out and touched your arm. “did you—ahh!” you screeched, jumping back when the person the hand belonged to was not theo, but someone else. 
the unknown person was a man, well, more a boy, blonde hair peeking out behind his mask. he wore an even darker tuxedo than theo, the black on his body almost making him invisble against the dark of the corridor. 
theo behind you, spun around, ready to meet your attackers face with his fist. before he hit him, you stopped the movement, pulling the dark haired boy back by the arm. “malfoy” you said simply, sharing the gathered piece of information with theo, who relaxed immediately. 
“potter” draco malfoy greeted almost bored. he moved the mask from his face, revealing his ice blue eyes staring at you and theo in displasure. “theodore”
“draco” theo breathed. “i almost killed you”
“sure” malfoy rolled his eyes, not believing it for a second. “luckily potter here kept you from murdering any more people”
“haha” theo nodded. “very funny” 
malfoy shrugged, not caring one bit about his unsolicited joke against theo. rather than on his friend, malfoys gaze was fixated on you. you lifted your mask too, deeming it weird to act like your identities hadn’t been revealed. 
“i should’ve known you were involved in this club” theo crossed his arms, making not even the slightest move to take off his mask too. 
“well, theodore, i’d say it is in my blood” malfoy took his eyes from you for a mere second, before his unnerving gaze returned. “unlike you, halfblood”
“careful” theo warned, voice filled with a sharp edge. 
malfoy’s gaze flicked back to him, eyes narrowing with an unspoken challenge. he tilted his head slightly, the question clear in his expression, almost daring theo: have you forgotten where you belong?
“it’s alright” you mumbled, not even moved by the blonde boy’s words. he had insulted you and your friends too often for you to still care about it, unlike harry, who almost enjoyed throwing a tantrum. maybe that was the reason malfoy hated you a little less than your brother. you knew how to behave and that was something he respected.  “what do you want?”
“i didn’t come to murder you, if that’s what you’re thinking” malfoy replied, his tone almost playful as he hinted at your reaction of panic at his sudden presence “nor to give you more proof. that’s not why i’m here.”
“then what?” theo snapped impatiently, eyes still on malfoy. “what’s so important that you had to deliver it in person?”
draco paused, his gaze darkening as his playful demeanor faded. his next words were spoken softly, almost ominously. “a warning.”
the air in the corridor grew thick, the weight of his words pressing down on you. theo stiffened beside you, his guard going back up as malfoy’s expression turned deadly serious.
“a warning about what?” you asked, your heart pounding now, knowing that this wasn’t just another one of malfoy’s games.
malfoy stepped closer, his voice barely above a whisper. “someone’s watching you. and it’s not just the castle’s usual suspects.” he hesitated for a moment, his eyes locking with yours, as if deciding whether to reveal more. then, quietly, he added, “you're not safe. neither of you.”
before you could question him further, malfoy backed into the shadows, disappearing as quickly as he had come.
“malfoy!” theo called after him, but it was too late—he was gone.
the tension in the air remained, your heart still racing. you exchanged a glance with theo, both of you realizing that whatever danger was lurking, it wasn’t just in the form of cryptic messages or secret clubs. it was something much darker.
and now, someone knew you were onto them.
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squareallworthy · 6 months ago
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Reverse unpopular opinion ask meme: Irregular polygons
Irregular polygons are awesome. You can do so much more with them, in so many areas, but I'm going to limit myself to talking about just two of them: tiling and triangle centers.
(Did you think I was going to be all snobby toward my irregular friends and give them only grudging approval? Heck no, I love those guys! And so by the rules of the meme I get to infodump about the things I love, so this may be long but you asked for it.)
Let's first talk about covering the plane with copies of a single shape -- a monohedral tiling. And for now, let's restrict ourselves to periodic tilings. All triangles and all non-self-intersecting quadrilaterals tile the plane periodically, so that's not very interesting. All you have to do is place one polygon and then make copies by rotating 180 degrees around the midpoints of the sides.
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With five sides, things become more complicated, because regular pentagons don't tile by themselves, but there are fifteen ways an irregular pentagon can periodically tile the plane. Here are four of them that were discovered in 1976 and 1977 by Marjorie Rice, an amateur mathematician.
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There are three types of monohedral periodic convex hexagonal tilings.
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For polygons with seven or more sides, there are no monohedral periodic tilings using a convex prototile , but there are periodic tilings for nonconvex polygons of any size. Some of them are quite famous.
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Most of Escher's work in his Regular Division of the Plane series uses shapes with curves as well as straight sides, so they don't show polygon tilings, strictly, but the patterns do point toward complex tilings that are visually pleasing.
Irregulars can tile aperiodically, too. Here's a pentagon tiling with 6-fold rotational symmetry. It can be extended infinitely, and tilings can be constructed with pentagons for n-fold symmetry of any n>2.
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Going back to non-convex shapes, here's the Voderberg tile, an enneagon that forms a spiral tiling. Notably, one copy of the shape can be completely surrounded by two others.
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And of course I can't go without mentioning the tiling news of the century: "Tile (1,1)", aka the Hat, aka the T-shirt, a tridecagon (and polykite) that can tile the plane but only aperiodically. IDK if you follow polygon news but this was huge.
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Okay, enough about tilings. With tilngs it's pretty easy to get what's going on just by looking at them, but my next topic, triangle centers, requires a bit more explanation. Also there's a bit of jargon, but I will try to keep it simple.
Take an arbitrary triangle ABC. Where is its center? One way you might define it is to find the midpoint of each side and draw a line to it from the opposite vertex. Each line divides the triangle in half, and these three lines (the medians) all cross at a point, the centroid. This works for any triangle, no matter its shape. The point marks the center of gravity of the area of the triangle, and also the center of gravity of its vertices. Based on that, you could consider this the center of the triangle.
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Or you could work with angles instead of sides. Draw lines from each vertex that divide the angles in half (the angle bisectors). These all meet at a point called the incenter, which marks the center of the largest circle that fits inside the triangle. To put it another way, it's the point that is equidistant from all three sides. That's another point you could call the center of the triangle.
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Or, how about a circle around the triangle instead? From the midpoints of the sides, draw the perpendicular bisectors. Again, they all intersect at a point, the circumcenter, which is the center of the circle that passes through the vertices -- the point that is equidistant from all three of them. So you could also call that the center of the triangle.
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Or how about drawing perpendicular lines from the sides again, but having them pass through the opposite vertices (the altitudes)? They coincide at a point called the orthocenter. Isn't that neat? Yet another point we could call the center of the triangle.
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But wait -- can we? For an obtuse triangle, the circumcenter and the orthocenter are going to lie outside the triangle. (For the orthocenter of an obtuse triangle, you have to extend each side into a line, and draw the altitude as a perpendicular to that.) Being outside a thing is really not what we have in mind when we talk about the center of the thing. Should we care about that?
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Maybe not. Check this out. We'll go back to the circumcircle, and draw tangents to it at the three vertices. The three tangents form the tangential triangle (in blue), which we'll call A'B'C', where A' is opposite A, and so on with B and C. Now draw the circle that passes through A, A', and the circumcenter, and do the analogous construction for B and C (in red). The three circles coincide in two places: the circumcenter and another point called the far-out point. And as the name suggests, this is usually well outside the triangle, even for acute triangles.
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There's no reasonable way to call this point the center of the circle. But so what? I just love the fact that the three circles line up like that. I no longer care about finding "the" center of the triangle. I no longer care that "center" is rather a misnomer for many of these points. I just think it's neat that you can draw these constructions on ordinary aysmmetrical triangles and they keep all converging on one point. Want more? Reflect the medians across the angle bisectors, and they all meet at the symmedian point. Or connect the vertices of the tangential triangle with the intersections of the medians and the circumcircle. Those lines meet at the Exeter point. Or, from each vertex, draw the line that splits the perimeter of the triangle in half. These are called the splitters, and they meet at the Nagel point. And on and on and on.
You can simply wander around a triangle, connecting things that relate somehow to vertex A, then do the equivalent thing for B and C, and stumble upon new centers. And there are tens of thousands of these things, constructed with straightedge and compass or by other methods. And there are so many ways to enjoy these things. You can page through the enormous collection and get a kind of stamp-collecting satisfaction just looking at their variety and knowing that they exist. Or you can appreciate the proofs that show that the constructions really do specify a unique point. Or proofs that show that a point constructed to have one property has a surprisingly different property. Or you can notice that the points fall into certain families and appreciate the connections between them. (For instance, the centroid, circumcenter, orthocenter, far-out point, and Exeter point, among others, all happen to lie on the same line, the Euler line.) Or you can convert the points to trilinear coordinates, manipulate them algebraically, and get to know them that way.
But to appreciate them at all, you need to work with irregular triangles. Because here's the thing: in an equilateral triangle, all these points collapse to the same point. Everything simplifies to a single center, and the incredible wealth of invisible structure that teems inside every ordinary triangle is gone.
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You have finally found "the" center, but at what cost? Symmetry is death. Only through asymmetry will the vast truth of the triangle be revealed to you.
And those are just a few of the reasons irregular polygons are cool!
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sssammich · 6 months ago
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For supercorp 💗 🥹🥹
💗 slow kiss / gentle kiss / inevitable / soft
thanks for your patience, anon! alas, i have gone overboard once more because i cannot help myself.
ask meme
---
she's been given a mandatory month off from supergirl duties. she's not sick, she hasn't solar flared, and she's not hurting for any freelance work that requires her attention. she had simply been told that she needed to take the time off and to avoid any caped hero work unless absolutely necessary.
so that's why she's here now, without superhero work for the next thirty days. free to do whatever she wants.
after the initial shock washes over her, she places her hands on her hips and nods towards alex and j'onn. she knows exactly what she wants to do with her freedom.
"okay."
"look, before you fight th--okay?" alex stares at her, wide eyes mirroring kara's. "really?"
she shrugs, already heading towards the elevator. no need to fight the inevitable. "really."
as the elevator doors close in front of her, she can't help smirking in amusement at the identical confused expressions on both of their faces.
she has one destination in mind.
-
she knocks on the massive wooden door, though she knows she doesn't need to. it's a formality at this point considering the unrestricted access that she's been granted to enter the top floor of this condominium highrise.
still, she waits, because the anticipation is half the fun.
her face splits into an easy smile when lena opens the door to her with her own toothy grin.
"heya," she greets, stepping foot into what she calls home: within lena's arms.
"hello to you, too," lena says, swift yet careful in wrapping kara in her arms. her hands are open as they rub circles on kara's back. kara sinks further into lena's embrace, pulling lena further into her. "how are you?"
"i'm great."
lena stares into her eyes. "yeah?"
"oh yeah. i'm on vacation." she emphatically nods.
lena beams at that. "funny you say that. me too."
she quirks a brow at that, though she shouldn't be surprised. a month vacation doesn't just fall into people's laps without explanation. "yeah?"
"oh yeah," lena mimics her.
kara, still holding lena in her arms, pulls the other woman back in, the two of them swinging in place. "what a coincidence, right?"
lena throws her head back in laughter.
-
they arrive in a private villa off the coast of naples.
it's a modest hillside two bedroom house that overlooks the gulf below. when the local guide roll their suitcases for them, he unknowingly wheels lena's to one room and hers to the other. she smirks and lena tips him handsomely--enough that his olive skin tinges in embarrassment at just how much is in his hands. when their eyes meet after he leaves, they break into a giggle.
because they know the truth, despite not uttering a word of it: why bother taking up more room when right by each other's side is all the space they'll want to take.
despite the destination of her luggage, her body follows after lena to the other room, the one with the better view of the water. just as well, lena's body follows after her when they busy themselves in the kitchen to make themselves a quick dinner. when they finish, they share the hammock sitting out on the back deck, lena's head on her chest and her arms around her waist, while kara's arms wind their way in holding lena against her, their limbs tangled.
when lena yawns a few too many times, they call it a night. lena leads, their hands entwined, and they end up on lena's bed, drawing back the thin covers enough to stave off the inevitable cool night air.
-
they walk everywhere, always touching. a hand on the arm the elbow the bicep the small of her back. an arm slung over a shoulder or hooked together.
it's when they reach a destination that kara's courage grows, that lena's bravery broadens.
when they travel to the town square market as they shop for groceries that lips find their way on one another's skin; the temple the cheek the forehead.
when they treat themselves to a picnic right by a vineyard and lena is leaning back on her between her legs, lips chance on a bare and pale shoulder.
when they lounge in the hammock and lena is resting on her chest, lips chance on collarbones and behind the ears.
when they tire themselves out from full days, fuller stomachs, and fullest hearts that they are in bed and lena is facing her and their legs are tangled with one another, lips chance on entwined hands and fingers.
each one given freely, each one received gracefully.
soon, kara thinks, this will all change. especially when they cross the final threshold between them. though that's a formality at this point, all things considered.
still, she will wait until that happens, more than happy to be exactly where she is.
-
thirty days is long and short and is plenty and is not enough.
on their last day while they wait for their local guide to collect them, they stand on the corner edge of the back deck, lena in her arms as they overlook the gulf for the last time.
"i don't want to go back to work," she murmurs into lena's ear. lena twists in kara's arms until they're facing one another.
"you don't have to, if you really don't want to."
"we can move into this villa. i'll learn to fish. you can sell them at the market."
lena laughs in her arms and kara holds her tighter, like trying to capture lightning in a bottle.
"you're no good as a fisherman, sweetheart."
kara pouts because it's probably true. but she'll learn for lena.
"well, next time we're on vacation, we ought to come back."
"anything you want," lena says, her eyes dipping down to where kara's lips are.
"anything?"
lena nods, assuring, her eyes darkening. kara's smile widens and she leans forward just enough, their noses brushing.
kara is ready for what's to come. she's ready for lena.
still, she waits, because the anticipation is half the fun.
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