#just clarifying incase it came out wrong

[autistic-katara]

very true but if ur talking abt the situation i’m talking abt it is kinda ableist/fatphobic how ppl r hcing the only physically disabled and idk hes not rlly plus-sized but hes bigger than the other characters whos also pretty heavily autistic coded as ace, esp when he’s canonically very not ace

like if ur a disabled/plus-sized/autistic ace person hcing him as ace then there isnt rlly a problem but denying that there’s ableism involved is just ignorant

(also yes this is abt the ace Will/Dustin discourse since i’m pretty sure thats what ur talking abt and this is entirely on the Dustin side of things since i have no opinion on the Will stuff except that i personally cant see him as ace)

making characters asexual doesn't infantilise them. autistic aces exist. gay aces exist. disabled aces exist. our asexuality doesn't discount us as queer or as people or as representation. it's ridiculous that i have to say this

[personasintro]

Hi, its me the yapper!! Once again!! 👋👋

I just wanted to clarify something that both you and other commenters seem to have gotten wrong; Whatever I said was incase of the scenario that you’re not feeling the story like you used to, so writing it has taken longer bcs you do not enjoy it as much but you still want to appease the reader. Hence the unwanted suggestions I made.

In my point of view, it seemed that way so I thought it was inevitable that you one day drop the fic because yes we’re getting older and busier and we drift away from things we loved. Thats why I said “is it really that serious?” because you obviously seem willing to keep writing but the wait has gotten so long that it looks like you’re doing it out of obligation(?!).

Looks like I misjudged and I apologise if thats not the case. But it came out of genuine curiosity because I just cant comprehend such long wait. Thats a me problem ig🤷‍♀️

So what I got out of your response is that yes we might/will see the end of mh in like 1-2 years? (more or less)I get that I sound bitter but I promise I am NOT lmao its pure curiosity I promise!!!

Ps to people who said that that was uncalled for or that its serious to me otherwise I wouldn’t have bothered; As I said I am an avid reader of mh so after a reread I thought I could share my thoughts? Like its genuinely not that serious even to me, I didn’t think twice before sending the ask I did it just because the thought crossed my mind. And l believe the whole waiting thing is a fact, so people’s opinions on it are very much called for?

Is it any of our business how long mimi takes to write? No🙂‍↔️. Are we as readers entitled to an opinion as long as we’re respectful? I’d like to think yes🙂‍↕��

Anywayss have a good one yall

i understood what you meant in your previous ask. and i still stand by what i said many times before – i do not hold here anyone against their will and if anyone feels like they're getting older and lose an interest in any of my stories, that's okay and it's their decision to make. i can't be responsible for everyone's feelings of how they feel about this exact situation. that's beyond my control and you're all free to feel however you want. i do wish people would be more understanding and respectful and that's why i said that no one knows what someone goes through. just because i'm no longer totally open about what's going on in my life, doesn't mean i don't care about my stories.

i'm not writing out of obligation. sure, i do feel a certain responsibility to make mh my priority even more than ever, but it's not an obligation. and i wouldn't just drop the story. i said this too, i'll finish this story whether it's for myself or for everyone else as well.

i said this many times before too – i'm in a position where i write whenever i can and want. i do not have any schedule, actually i never had one – but readers were used to more frequent updates and now, of course it's harder to get used to less frequent updates. but that's just life. i apologized when i never had to. my plans was always to finish mh asap (still is) but sometimes things don't go as planned and there are things i don't even have control of.

i respect your opinion and i'm merely explaining myself on this, hope it can be taken with respect and understanding as well!

have a good day everyone ☀️

[actualpapanihil]

PEGGY - a fanfic of what I think her life could've been like!! As a warning it gets super lazy toward the end😭 and it's probably not the best ever due to the fact I've barely slept but shhh I'm rubbish at writing </3

I did forget maybe 1 or 2 parts but its fiiiiine I think!! I can't really think of TW's but car cr@sh mentions. Anyway, aside from that try to enjoy!! I tried to be descriptive but I'm super bad at that I think? And be warned it MAY make you cry (I dont really cry but I almost cried while writing)!!

AND NO just because it's a fanfic doesnt mean it's about being in a relationship idk if that's a connection people even make but I want to clarify this just incase^^ I do NOT write romantic things often, it makes me feel ill:D

"Marie?"

"MARIE! Where were you? You've been out all night!"

Marie's eyeliner and mascara was dripping down her face, not that she cared all that much. She had been out since 5pm on Sunday the 1st of September, and it was now 8am on monday. She was so thankful it was a week off.

Peggy stood, facing marie while holding a drawing, but Marie pushed her to the side and ran up the stairs.

Where has Marie been? Peggy wondered. She decided she would draw another picture for Marie, maybe that would cheer her up? She wasn't sure, she'd never seen Marie like this, and where was George? They were neighbors, and he certainly wasn't home. They would've known if he was, because he would've been round for breakfast.

"Marie! Wait!" Peggy decided to chase after her, the patter of her feet booming through the house, she'd never ran so fast, nor did she think she ever would again. She wanted to ask Marie if she was okay, she needed to. What if Marie depended on this question?

The hallways will still dark since no one had opened the curtains, the photos that hung on the wall of them and George suddenly began to feel like distant memories and yet she still didn't know what had happened. She loved it when George came round, no matter how annoying he could be at times, she loved it when he would draw with her, he was always very good at it but he just never showed it. The wooden flooring was cold, each plank felt as if it could've gone on forever, Marie's room felt as if it was stretching ever further away. The polaroids on her bedroom door of her and George seemed even more distant. It was suddenly like a chapter of her life was over, she didn't know what happened last night but whatever it was, it ment George was gone.

She couldn't go any more, she hadn't gone all that far but it felt as if she had been running to her sister forever. Peggy slid down the wall and curled into a ball, sobbing loudly outside the bathroom door. The cold floor felt as if it was nibbling away at her arms and legs.

No one was around to comfort her.

Marie then exited her room and gently walked to her mothers door and knocked.

"M- MARIEEEE!!" Peggy screamed, she was there, she could reach her.

But Marie just looked at her, then back away, saying nothing. Peggy screamed again, which then faded into the sound of her sobbing loudly. Marie went into their parents room, and it was as if Peggy couldn't move, like she was attatched to the floor, she felt heavy and extremely tired.

Everything started to fade from her view as she fell asleep, curled up on the cold, hard floor, in a puddle of her own tears.

Once she awoke, the curtains were open, and the sun was blaring through onto her face, Marie sat beside her and rubbed her hand accross Peggy's face, putting a letter in her hand. Marie was wearing her black coat, a pair of flared jeans and boots with a large duffel bag thrown over her shoulder.

"Peggy.. I'm sorry." She said shakily, while beginning to cry once again.

"Marie? What are you sorry for? You've done nothing wrong."

"I need to go, I'm sorry for it. I need to get away from here, from everything, just for a little while, okay?"

She still hadn't removed her hand from Peggy's face, and peggy was about to cry once again, what did Marie mean by she's going? Where is she going? How long for? When will she back? Who is she going with? Is she going to be okay?

"Marie... I'll see you soon, okay?"

"Okay. Goodbye, Peggy."

Marie removed her hand and then stood up. She walked toward the stairs, then turned and smiled at Peggy. She went downstairs and then returned with a blanket and pillow in her hands. She put the pillow beneath Peggy's head and draped the blanket over her.

"...and don't forget me, yeah? I've loved having you as a sister and I don't want to return to you thinking I'm a stranger." Marie giggled, before turning once again and going down the stairs.

Little did Peggy know, this would be the last time she would see Marie for 18 years. Watching her go downstairs made her shake, she could feel her heart pounding out of her chest with each step she took.

Suddenly, the bedroom door swung straight open with a squeak and her parents dashed downstairs. Her mother was wearing a gorgeous baby blue nighty which has small white frills at the bottom, with her hair in pink rollers. Her hair was brown, but it was also very long, Marie often used to envy the length of it. Following closely behind was her father, he had black hair, but it was relatively messy and he was usually unshaven, he was wearing a pair of pyjama bottoms with no shirt as usual. They both dashed down the stairs behind their daughter.

Peggy tried to listen, but she couldn't tell any of the words which were being said. She then heard the door slam shut and her mother breaking down into tears.

She didnt even have the strength to open the letter Marie gave her, she threw it to near her feet and screamed loudly, wailing for Marie. Two people had now left her life, but this was only the beginning.

Four years had passed, Peggy was 13 now. It'd been three years since her dad walked out and almost two since the accident. And to add even more salt to her injury, her mother had remarried to Mr. Weaver recently and changed her name to Peggy Weaver. Now one of the only things that felt like a connection to Marie had been changed, she'd been drawing pictures for Marie almost daily and adding them to a box under her bed. Sometimes she would write letters, sometimes she'd draw pictures, and even sometimes she would add photos and things she found around the house. Anything that she felt as if tied together the past 4 years for Marie went in, she hoped to one day give it all to her, show her how her life had been since she and George had left. Even things that made her sad went inside, like a dried up rose from her father's funeral and the letter Marie gave her, she'd almost read it once and put it back. It caused too much pain, even so long after.

Her parents never told her what they and Marie had spoken about, they refused even when asked directly. The relationship Peggy and Mr. Weaver had wasn't the best, she kept trying to distance herself from him and would often cry about her birth father leaving her in Gallows Creek. She would've preferred to live in Quiet Ridge with her father, though that wouldn't have lasted long. Her mother was barely present anymore, she was usually working night shifts and when she wasn't she was anywhere but at home.

Her entire family was soon about to change though, a few months later Mr. Weaver began to get sick, and he didn't last too long after, and soon after her mother was gone too. Almost her entire family was gone aside from a distant aunt from California who had to move in to look after Peggy.

The first months were extremely difficult for her, she had no idea who this woman was nor how she was related to her. But she was a hard worker, and she ended up getting a job for KFAM, she was an office lady but that really wasn't what she wanted. On Peggy's days off she would usually go with her to work and run errands, normally passing around letters from Reggie and making the occasional couple bucks. She never really grew to know the staff all that well, but she loved the building.

From then she knew she wanted to be a radio producer. Reggie gladly allowed her to have the job when she was old enough, he was told by other members of staff how cheerful she was whenever she passed them things and John would let her draw at his desk and sometimes even help with paperwork. She then began training, the days were long and tiring at first but she quickly began to get the hang of things. But there was one issue, they didn't have a show for her to produce... until a radio DJ came all the way from Chicago. Forrest Nash. He replaced the old DJ instantly on The Scream.

[matthewkniesys]

Brendan Brisson's Best Friend- Thomas Bordeleau

Summary: Y/n and Thomas are dating but the boys don't know and you go to the carnival with them.

A/n: Hey guys! Ahhh, so I'm so excited for this one! This is my first Thomas fic so... Feedback good or bad is always welcome here so please tell me what you think. It might be a bit sad. Please tell me if you want a part two. Special thanks to Abbs ( @1-800-iluvhockey )for all the help! <33 I hope you guys enjoy it :)

I want to clarify incase anyone's confused this is a Thomas Bordeleau x reader fic but Brendan is a main character in it.

Here's part 2

Here's part 3

You're standing in front of the full length mirror in your room looking over what is probably the tenth outfit you had tried on.  You were thinking about how you wanted to try on one more outfit, when you heard your boyfriend of a month and a half mutter something quietly to himself. "What" you ask Thomas,a little bit annoyed that he interrupted your train of thought. "It's just that you're taking a really,really long time to decide on what to wear" he tells you " I think you look good no matter what you wear".  You thank him and ultimately decide to wear a pair of ripped jeans and a cropped black top since it's relatively warm. "Babe it's gonna be 7 at night by the time we get to the carnival ,you sure you won't be cold or do you just want an excuse to steal another one of my hoodies?" Thomas questions with a smirk. "I would never!" you respond knowing fully that, that's your plan. You leave the room to go and fix your hair.

"C'mon y/n we should get going or we are going to be late picking up Briss"  your boyfriend yells at you from the bottom of the stairs 15 minutes later. " I'm coming" you yell back. 

It's funny when you think about it because without Brendan you probably would never have met Thomas. You and Brendan had been best friends since forever and then when he introduced you to Thom there was just an instant connection and hey,now the two of you are dating! The only catch is that Brendan or any of the Umich guys don't know yet. It's not that you didn't want to tell Brendan you were just nervous about his reaction. He was like a brother to you and you were worried that this would cause problems between him and Thomas.

You finished your makeup and rushed down the stairs. You met Thomas at the bottom and stopped on the last stair. "What's wrong" you ask wondering why he's just standing there staring at you. He eventually pulls it together “ You look absolutely beautiful” he tells you as he picks you up and spins you around. 

The two of you get into the car and Thomas puts the key in the ignition and turns the car on. He places his hand on your thighs and starts driving. The car ride to Brendan's is silent but it's a comfortable silence. 

When you get there the both of you get out and knock on Briss's door. He yells to come in. When you get inside Thomas goes to look for Brendan. All of a sudden you hear Thomas yelling at Brendan but he didn't sound mad so you went to go find them. When you got closer you could hear what Thomas was saying " Brendan I texted you 30 minutes ago and you told me you were ready. I swear you are even worse than y/n". "Sorry I'm- wait what? You were at y/n/n's, Why? Is she here? I thought I was picking her up" rambles Brendan, clearly hurt. Oh shit you forgot Brendan was picking you up. Oh well. "Umm" Thomas mutters nervously. But you being the person you are ran into the room and came to Thom's rescue. You cut him off before he can say anything stupid "Geez chill out Bren, I just needed help picking an outfit and no offense but Bords has way better sense of style than you". See this is the exact reason you were worried about telling Brendan about you and Thomas. " Hey that's rude" states Brendan. "Hey I don't make the rules" you tell him.

"Okay can we get going?" Questions Thomas "I don't want to be late". " Okay, okay I'm ready to go on I guess" says Brendan. And with that your trio left to go to the carnival. The ride with Brendan was very different from the one with just Thomas. The 3 of you sat there absolutely belting out Taylor Swift. Thomas drove and Brendan sat in the passenger seat while you were stuck in the back.  After what seemed like hours of listening to Brendans horrible singing you guys arrived at the carnival. 

Originally this was supposed to be a date between just you and  Bords but your boyfriend stupidly let it slip that he was going to the carnival  when he was hanging out with “the boys”. Thankfully he didn't include that you were his date but he did tell them he had a date. They were all so invested in finding out who it was but ( to your surprise) Thomas didn't tell them. You thought for sure he would Crack under the pressure. The boys all decide they would come and just be at the carnival "for moral support" as Matty said. So your boyfriend kinda had a problem. You just told him to tell the guys that his date was canceled, which he did, so the guys decided they would just go out together and Brendan wanted to invite you. Hence why you're here right now. 

Currently you, Brendan and Thomas were waiting for the rest of the guys to show up. Matty and Trusc were next. And lastly it was Owen and Kent. 

"So what are we doing first" asks Brendan to no one in particular. "How about bumper cars?" Suggests Owen. "Sure why not" and all the guys agree except for Thomas. "Maybe me and y/n will go play ring toss. There isn't a very long line. We'll meet up with you in about 20 minutes". "Okay I guess so" says Brendan giving you and Thomas a weird look.

Your group parts ways but Brendan still seems super suspicious. You tug on Thomas's hoodie to get his attention. "What babe" he asks. "We have to be more careful around Bren". "I think we're doing a pretty good job already y/n/n". "Did you not see his face back there" you ask Thomas. "No, why?". "He looked like he was ready to murder you" you tell him " I think he has a suspicion something is going on". "Well he's not wrong" Thomas replies. "Thomas" you whine " I don't think you're getting the point". "Y/n chill out. Why do you care so much if he knows?" Thomas questions. "I-I I just don't know okay" you snap "I'm worried about losing Bren and I'm worried about you losing Brendan and I just- I don't know". You are so close to crying and the only thing keeping you together is the fact that you're at a carnival. A freaking carnival. You're not supposed to cry there. 

Thomas takes a deep breath and then says " Baby, I'm so sorry. You're right. If you don't want him to know and you think we need to be more careful we will, I promise".  "I-I think I love you Thomas" you say quickly. "I love you too baby" Thomas replies a little slower pulling you into a soft kiss. 

"What the fuck" says a familiar voice behind you. Brendan. Oh shit. You pull away quickly from Thomas leaving a confused look on your boyfriend's face until he turns around and sees what you're looking at. His face falls and you hear him quietly mutter " fuck". 

Brendan angrily stomps over to the two of you. "What the hell was that? I trusted you guys. Even when my gut was telling me that the 2 of you we're dating I ignored it cause you guys are my best friends. I thought you would at least tell me and that's not even talking about how I told you Thomas, that y/n was off limits. She is no was my best friend and now I don't even know what to think" Brendan yells. 

You couldn't even care that everyone at the carnival heard that. All you care is that you might have lost your best friend since you were 2. "Just don't even try to contact me or I will block you. If I want to hear from you I will text" Brendan whispers walking away, a tear trickling down his cheek. You felt a tear rolling down your own cheek as well. "Wait, who will drive you home?" Thomas yells after Brendan. "Matty and Jacob" he yells back. 

"I guess that's our signal to go" says Matty " but congrats you guys are really cute". "Bye" you whisper, afraid that if you talk too much you'll completely break down.  "See you,congrats" Trusc says. Him and Matty leave you,Owen,Kent and Thomas standing there.

"We should probably go but I just wanted to say that you guys are really cute and I hope you guys are happy" Owen pauses and then continues " I'm sure Brendan will come around, and as cliché as it sounds just give him time". Kent nods his head in agreement and with that it's just you and Thomas left.

"So…" Thomas starts and then trails off when he sees you in tears. He immediately wraps his strong arms around you and says nothing. 

"Thomas... what I said before was true I really do love you but at least for tonight I need to be alone. I'll call you at some point just not today. I'll just catch a cab home. I'll see you later" you tell Thomas,soaking his hoodie with your tears.

"Wait, I'll give you my keys and you can take my car" your boyfriend tells you. "Are you sure?". "Yes 100%" he tells you. In reality he didn't want you taking the cab but also this was his way to ensure he would see you again.

You take the keys and with one final look over your shoulder you walk away from Thomas, tears streaming down your cheeks.

[uuujeewriting]

may I request HCs for Albedo, Childe, Kaeya, Diluc and Xiao realizing their fem!darling is a yandere? like how would they feel and react?? ( i hope u don't make it too angst :(( ) - if u don't feel comfortable wrting this, i am deeply apologize, feel free to ignore this :<

stop it [albedo, childe, kaeya, diluc, xiao]

they find out their darling is a yandere! how will they fight to fix them?

tw: UNHEALTHY/TOXIC RELATIONSHIP, gore, violence, cuss words, manipulative behavior, obsessive and possessive behavior, murder

albedo x fem! reader, childe x fem! reader, kaeya x fem! reader, diluc x fem! reader, xiao x fem! reader

a/n: just a note that this behavior should not be romanticized and should not be followed! i believe that the boys would not condone this behavior either. sorry that this took a while nonnie! hope this is to your liking.

i would like to clarify that if any of these scenarios/hc's of mine are similar to other writers' works, it is unintentional and i apologize

not proof read

albedo

it came to him when he started picking up on your possessive behavior

he first found it quite unusual, how defensive you were when people–even his own students–pointed out how much you hogged the man to yourself

it was no secret you loved him, albeit maybe you did a little too much 

for the first few days of this repetitive behavior of yours, he didn’t seem to take it too seriously, he even indulges your fantasies when he found the time to do so

calling him yours alone and how everyone wouldn't matter, just as his queen said

how foolish of him to feed into this obsessive mindset of yours, he now knows

the kreideprinz was a fearless man, never submitting even to the most nerve-wracking of consequences

you should earn an award for making him tremble

face to face with your gruesome figure, albedo hesitates to move

finally, you break the tension

“what’s wrong, my love? is something bothering you?” you ask, taking a step forward

“stay back. don’t you dare touch me- i-..” he grows speechless

you slowly retreated to your space, pouting

“is it this corpse? i’m sorry, but she was getting in the way! always asking about your whereabouts and such, truly a burden-”

“sucrose was my assistant! why the hell wouldn’t she ask about me?!” his heart rate quickened, the blond has never experienced this much terror in his life

you grew silent, taking in the chief alchemist’s words

he feels his heart drop to his feet when he sees you smile slowly

“well, there’s nothing we can do about it now, hm?” you hug albedo after throwing the bat you used to bash open your victim’s skull, tainted with putrid crimson 

you laugh and bury your head in his chest but you notice droplets of water falling to your scalp

you look up at your quivering love and he stares back at you

“i’ll fix you, i’ll do whatever it takes to change those despicable temptations of yours and i’ll get you back, y/n.”

childe

childe was naturally clingy, never letting you out of his sight for more than two minutes. as a result, he didn't pick up on the subtle signs of your toxic behavior

what made him question this was your unreasonably foul attitude towards his family

one night, you and him visited his siblings in snezhnaya to have dinner

he was jubilant to say the least, the love of his life will finaly get the chance to meet the people he loved just as much as her!

"why are you so excited to see your siblings?" your question left him dumbfounded

did you not want to see them?

"well, y/n my dear, if there was anything i loved nore than you; it would be my beloved family!" he chuckles

when you reach his house, he's so excited that he misses how your eyes darken when he knocks at the door

"big brother! you're here!" teucer jumps in joy and hugs his sibling, the brother in question hugs back lovingly

how you hated it, make it end already

"teucer! i've missed you, too. how are sister tonia and the others?" childe smiles

was your presence suddenly not the most important thing anymore to him?

oh no, you're not going to let this happen

you cough and childe looks back at you, apologizing

"sorry, babe. come inside, i'll introduce you to the others." he takes your hand and guides you indoors to the living room

at the sight of their dear big brother, the group of siblings raced and laced their arms around him one way or another

childe laughs and attempts to stretch to hug all of then at the same time, only being able to circle two of his siblings

you felt inadequate again, damn siblings.

as childe introduces you to his family as his girlfriend, you didn't bother to mask your dislike for them

this concerns your beloved to the highest caliber

dinner rolls around and uncharacteristically, you offer to help out with preparing the food

childe was reluctant but overall, he couldn't deny a chance for you to finally change your views on atleast one of his siblings

"thank you for allowing me to help, tonia." you smile, feigningly to clarify

"it's no problem, i should be thanking you for insisting." she laughs and leaves the food on the counter to grab a condiment placed on the opposite side of the kitchen

quickly and silently, you scan the premises for what you needed

you find a container of rubbing alcohol in a compartment

grinning, you took it and spilled half the container into the water jug to be served

discarding of the half-empty bottle and putting the jug's lid back on, tonia returns and continues preparing the food

perfect.

when the food and tampered water was served, you replaced childe's glass of water swiftly

one of the siblings drinks the water and after a few minutes, he excuses himself while coughing

tonia was next and then teucer, childe was going insane and growing more and more concerned

finally having enough, he checks the food and once he smells the strong scent of alcohol in the jug of water, his eyes widen

he turns to you, his heart sinking at your triumphant expression

"y/n, how could you?!" he furrows his eyebrows, what happened to his beloved?

"they were taking you away from me. what was i supposed to do?" you raise an eyebrow

he clenches his fist. when he hears his siblings suffering, he heaves heavily

"we'll talk about this later and i swear to the gods i will change your attitude."

kaeya

kaeya is perceptive, he may have picked up on your despicable views earlier than the rest

how? don't question, it's his responsibility to take care of you

he does nothing at first, finding your obsessive behavior harmless at the present time

however, he draws the line after one particular event

"haha, well- if it weren't for how you sneaked through headquarter grounds, i wouldn't have had to waste my time tracking you down." he peers sarcastically at rosaria, he latter scoffing

"it's none of my business what you find suspicious." she sips on the wine she was holding

kaeya lets out a 'tch' and looks away, clearly upset

he arrives home to you cooking supper, his arms snaking around your waist

you smile, "bad day?" you ask, you know how he gets when he's dim and gloomy

"not particularly, but just had some trouble with sister rosaria."

what?

"what about her?" your grip on the ladle tightens

"nothing, it's really not a big deal." he palms your hand, kissing your neck

"oh, alright. if you say so, love." you state, but he should've watched what he says

you had your mind set and there was no stopping you

around 2-3 am you sneaked out of your shared home with the captain.

grabbing a cloak and satchel which incased your belongings, you head out into the streets

'where could that damn nun be at this time of night?'

you ponder for a good few minutes until-

bingo; clearing camps.

sneaking past the knights is rather easy, distract them with a rabbit and all is good

pulling the hood of the cloak lower to hide your face, you speed into the wilderness in search of rosaria

you find the preoccupied nun vanquishing a camp of hilichurls around the whispering woods, too busy to notice your presence

opening your satchel, you take your mask and secure it to your face

time to go through with the plan you'd devised.

"huh-?" rosaria hadn't reacted fast enough and you managed to tackle her to the ground after the last hilichurl was disposed of

she chokes on your hold and attempts to shove you off, only for her attempt to whiff

grabbing the polearm she had in her dominant hand, you twirl it and use it to replace your hand on her throat, choking her with ger own weapon

"w-who in t-the world..?" rosaria glares and struggles to keep herself conscious

you smirked, putting more pressure on the polearm

she grows more and more panicked, you bask in her expression of utter helplessness

she should have known better than to mess with you

to mess with kaeya

this is what she gets

you are going to have your way

yes, almost there-

"not quite, fiend."

suddenly, you get pulled back by the hood and you gasp in shock

rosaria recovers quickly and stands up, snatching back her weapon from your distracted figure

"though i hate to admit it, you sure can be a helpful comrade, cavalry captain." the nun scoffs

your blood went cold

"now who in the seven nations might this rodent be?" kaeya frowns, you attempt to struggle from his grip but to no avail

he takes off your disguise and you purse your lips

"..y/n?" rosaria questions, much more confused than your lover

"i had a feeling." kaeya remarks, surprising both you and the nun

"kaeya, you understand right? she upset you, she made you go through all that work just for you to find out it was some shady bitch roaming around the fucking city!" the two wince at your vulgar language, clearly not having any of it

"what's done is done." rosaria states and goes ahead to return to mond

kaeya lets you go and crosses his arms, disappointed in you

"you should know better, y/n. i'll have you know that although i love you dearly, this behavior of yours is not what i want from you." he reprimands you and you furrow your brows

"it's just me showing my love for you, i don't see what's wrong."

your statement makes the knight sigh

this is going to be a long night for the both of you

diluc

diluc wouldn't be too busy to spend time with you, but he'd be too busy to take notice of your toxicity

you lived in the manor, because of this, you had access to everything in the site

and when i say everything, i mean everything

yes, he trusted you too much and that's his downfall

not his, but rather a maid's

you were aware of his darknight hero duties and he made sure that you did, kissing you goodbye before leaving to rinse the land of roaming dangers

one night in particular, a certain head maid had made you quite envious

offering diluc a glass of grape juice, fixing his collar before he goes on about his daily stroll, even daring to clean his shared bedroom with you! my, how audacious she is.

after giving you a tender kiss, your lover heads out into the night and leaves you with the maids, giving you the opportunity to continue on your devious ways

calling adelinde into the garden, she comes along with the items you requested

two towels, a fork and a plate

of course she questioned it but who was she to deny her master's sweetheart?

with shaking limbs, she made her way towards the garden

"ah, finally. you're here," you make your way towards adelinde and she gulps

"i-i have the items you requested, miss y/n," she hands you the three objects that will serve a huge purpose tonight

"thank you," you smile at her as she attempts to smile and bow respectfully

"if that is all, i shall take my leave." she retreats into the manor

or atleast, she thoughts she was going to

quickly, you roll the towel and gag adelinde with it, tying the towel together and stabbing it to her nape with the fork with brute force

she screams for a split second and you smile, quickly bashing her head with the plate.

looking down at your doing, you grin impossibly wide

"miss y/n, why couldn't you have simply knocked her out first as to avoid her creating a rather loud shriek?" elzer sighed

"i wanted to hear her in agony, is that odd?" you raise an eyebrow at the chairman

he shakes his head, "no, not at all, master."

the next day, diluc is faced with a rather odd feeling of dread

as he finds adelinde, ironically, nowhere to be found, he immediately asks elzer which in turn is sworn to secrecy by you

it completely drove him mad, and you tried to take his mind off the maid yet he only pushed you aside

this angered you to the core

"what–is that maid more important than me now, after all this work i've done for you?!" you yelled at him and he huffs in annoyance

"what do you mean work?!" he yells back

"what could you have possibly done for me-" "i got rid of that bitch!"

he freezes, what did you just say?

you, there's no way. you aren't serious right? he must've misheard you, there's no fucking possibility that his head maid was de-

"she's gone. i made sure of it."

diluc feels a boiling sensation in his stomach and he takes your wrist to drag you to the outside of his office

"y/n, you better tell me where she is or i swear to barbatos i'm going to-"

he stops himself. what was he going to do? the same thing you had just done?

you smile at his realization, circling him

"see? you were just about to be hypocritical there, love." you chuckle

diluc gritted his teeth and steadies himself

he's going to teach you a lesson one way or another, but never in his life will he come to commit the crime you'd done

xiao

the adeptus neither cared nor disliked the things you do for him, however, when you stepped out of line one day, he began to watch over you like a hawk

it was when the traveler, lumine, visited your adeptus lover

you were excited to see xiao, you had two plates of almond tofu in hand and was stepping up the staira to the balcony

you hummed a little tune to yourself

"first hilichurl got sick, second hilichurl took care, third hilichurl gathers medicine, fourth hilichurl prepares-"

you halt your singing when you hear laughter

laughter from a woman, huffs from a man

an adeptus

your adeptus

"xiao, thanks for meeting up with me today, i really appreciate it." lumine smiles at the yaksha, "we would've been at a loss if it weren't for you."

frowning, you step back and watch them from behind the opening of the balcony

"i am in no need of your reassurance, puny mortal. it was a necessity for rex lapis' sake, do not take it any other way." he says, although the flush of his face was an obvious indicator that he also cared for his friend

"yeah, whatever you say xiao." paimon laughed and lumine soon after

fuck. you felt something break on your foot.

xiao and the traveler snapped their heads to your direction–

only to find nothing there

"i'll go check on it," lumine offers and xiao simply nods, finishing the tofu she brought for him

the blonde traveller walks to the scene and sees a plate of almond tofu in bits and pieces

"eh?... what's all this?" she questions

she crouches down to observe the scene

her fault.

"AH-!" lumine tumbles down the stairs with you on top of her

not giving her time to react, you punch her in the face repeatedly

"don't-" smack in the face

"try-" punch up her chin

"to-" bash her head on the floor

"take-" punch to the left

"him!" punch to the right

verr goldet and paimon cries for you to stop, the former prying you off the bruised blonde

xiao hears the commotion and sees the traveller's nose bleeding and your figure heaving on the ground, fists clenched

if verr goldet hadn't pulled you away, you would've killed the girl

xiao huffs and shakes visibly

"what is all this?" he angrily mumbles, "care to explain yourself, y/n?"

"xiao-" you begin to cry, "why would you spend time with her? i'm hurt of course!"

"you intend to tell me you're the only one i can talk to?" he raises his tone

"yes!" you whimper

unbelievable

"..verr goldet, bring the traveller to a healer, y/n, come with me." he holds a stoic expression

he was beyond angry

following him to the balcony, he keeps a distance from you, about three steps away.

finally coming to a stop, he faces you.

"i don't know what got onto you, but we're going to solve this," he crosses his arms, "right here, right now."

[1980s-robin]

Pinkie Promise

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader

Summary: Reader and Steve are inseparable, even through dangerous times. But despite nearly dying, there’s just three unspoken little words that burden their minds. 

Word Count: 8.5k

Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence, Stab wounds, mentions of blood, cussing, basically just canon-typical stuff, pretty sure I clarified the reader as a girl at least once 

Notes: So, I’ve been rewatching Stranger Things because… ya know… October. And I’m in my Steve feelings and decided ‘hey! let’s write a giant fanfic about him’ so here it is. And kids? It’s a big one. Enjoy! I’ve been working on it for weeks.

It was meant to be a calm summer, perhaps your last ever calm summer - the plan after graduation having been to spend a year working to pay for your college tuition, or at least as much of it as you possibly could. It was a good plan, but of course, you didn’t factor in a Russian conspiracy theory underneath the mall.

You waved a goodbye to your supervisor at The Gap, watching her finish locking up from behind you as you pretended you were walking to the exit of the mall like you had done every other day. “If you need to get back in, you have your key right?” She questioned, you nodding as you pulled it out of your ‘hiding place’ - which happened to just be your bra. 

Once you had seen her take her leave, you quickly turned back around and knocked four times on the locked entrance of the Scoops Ahoy, being greeted by the face of your new friend Robin.

“Hey! Is everyone gone?” She questioned, peeking her head out as she opened up the store enough to let you in but not make too much noise - just in case there was still someone out there. 

“I think so, my store is usually the last to finish closing.” You responded as you looked around the inside of the store and followed Robin back into the break room, pulling a chair over to the table. Typically, when you came here during your lunch break, you would take a seat across from Steve but the inclusion of Dustin put you directly in the middle of the table.

“Well, Y/N, you joined a little late.” You heard from beside you, turning your head to watch Dustin sitting dramatically, his finger pointing accusingly at you.

“The hell is he on about?” You questioned as you glanced over at Steve, who turned to look at you and coughed awkwardly. 

“Robin already figured out what the code said but uh…. I don’t really believe it’s right.” He said with an almost disappointed look on his face as Robin and Dustin moved to the exit so everyone could leave. The code was figured out as far as they were concerned.

You glanced at the board and read what it said, your eyebrows scrunched together in confusion as you read the word but you shrugged and turned to face Steve. “If it is some sort of Russian code, I don’t see why they would say whatever it is they wanted directly.” You said as you moved over to the counter  climbing on top of it with the help of Steve.

As you slid onto the floor, your feet meeting the ground as gently as possible as to not hurt yourself, you watched Dustin nod in agreement with your statement. “She’s right, a top-secret Russian code wouldn’t be that obvious - it’s obviously coded.” He said.

“And I know my translation was right.” Robin added on, your head turning back to look at Steve for just a moment before you turned ahead again. 

As you listened absentmindedly to their conversation you sighed, almost relieved that you most likely didn’t have to deal with this anymore. “Well, whatever it is thankfully it’s far away from here.” 

Almost like a curse, the minute you turned back around Steve was kneeling in front of the mini-carousel ride and demanding a quarter. You had no idea why, you were just assuming he wanted to get on it or something - odd since he wasn’t five but… you weren’t one to judge him. 

As he finally got his quarter you watched with confusion written all over your face before you heard it, the song that you’d been hearing for the past few weeks but… then you realized why he was playing it. It seemed Dustin had the same thought as he pulled the recorder out, playing it for you all to hear the same song playing in both places.

You felt chills run down your spine, but as Robin reasoned that maybe they had the same type of horse in Russia you agreed - maybe because you wanted to believe it. 

But, Steve pointed out the name of the horse. Indiana Flyer. Why would they have an Indiana Flyer in Russia? The recording must’ve been coming from within the mall, and the thought of that horrified you. 

As you all walked out of the mall, you wanted to get away as quickly as possible, you followed Steve to his car since you lived close together - he typically drove you home. 

“Y/N?” You heard from beside you once you’d gotten in the passenger seat, everything seeming to go by in a blur since you hadn’t even noticed that he’d left the parking lot. “Are you okay?” Steve asked, watching as you finally turned to look at him.

“You want to go after the Russians, don’t you?” You asked, your head seemingly spinning from all the information that was being presented to you in that moment - it was a lot for you to process. 

“Well yeah, we can’t tell the police about it, they’ll think we’re pulling some kind of prank.” replied, as though it was common sense that he wanted to go after them - whoever they were.

“But Hopper he- he knows about all of the weird stuff going on, I’m sure he’d be understanding.” You reasoned, still not wanted to go through with this.

“Y/N… do YOU want to go after the Russians?” Steve finally asked, turning into the area of town with more houses, leaving behind the gas station that you both usually stopped at for drinks after a long day of work. 

“No I- It’s dangerous.” You said, but that excuse with nothing and you knew it.

“We’ve fought monsters before, I’m sure humans are a step down from that-” 

“Steve I- last time you almost died and I can’t-” You internally cringed at the memory of seeing him bloody and bruised, remembering him going out with nothing but a baseball bat and the terror on your face as you did everything you could to help. “I don’t want you to die.” you commented, glancing back down at your lap.

“That won’t happen again and… is me living really more important than like- maybe everyone in our town?” Steve questioned you as he glanced at you for a moment, mostly keeping his eyes on the road, though.

“They’re not you.” You mumbled, looking out of the window of the car, almost embarrassed at the clinginess you felt toward your best friend. All those years of watching Steve grow and change, feeling more than friendly things toward him and nearly crying every time he told you about a new girl and you’re just just attached at the hip as you always had been.

There wasn’t much time to think about this, though, as you felt Steve slide his hand into your own comfortingly, his other hand firmly on the steering wheel. “You can stay back if you want to, you know, I’d rather you not be in danger an-”

“No!” You rushed out, eyes wide as your head snapped to look at Steve. “If you’re going I’m going, you’re not getting yourself killed and leaving me behind.”

Steve raised an eyebrow, “So you’re implying we should die together?” He asked, trying to keep the conversation somewhat light-hearted as he pulled into the parking lot of his own home - about three down from yours. 

“I’m not implying anything, I’m saying that if this goes wrong and something happens I’m gonna be there.” You finally said, unbuckling your seatbelt before motioning ahead. “You want a sleepover or something? I’d love to braid your hair, Stevie.” You teased as you got out of the car, but even teasing felt wrong. You were absolutely terrified. 

“I want to walk you back, but since you’re so worried for me maybe you don’t want me walking back alone.” He retorted playfully, meeting you on the other side of the car.

You smacked his arm, “This is serious.” You said, walking toward your house with the boy practically at your heels. 

“I know, Y/N I know I just-” He stopped, not knowing exactly what it was that he wanted to say. “I’m scared too, you know, I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you.” He said as you finally reluctantly turned back to look at him. “But we have to do this, someone has to, you know people are just going to think we’re being crazy because of Vietnam or something.” 

With a sigh, you nodded. “I know that, I just hate seeing you hurt. I can’t imagine my life without you in it. You’re my best friend… I need you.” You said, feeling Steve link his arm with yours as you walked closer to your house, almost wishing you didn’t have to go in without Steve - just incase you never got to see him again.

You had noticed something stall in him at your words, maybe it was saying that you needed him - not that it was the only thing you wanted to say. But whatever it was that had given him pause wore off rather quickly as he composed himself. “I need you too, and I’m… I’m sorry to put you in this situation… again.” He said as you finally reached your door and turned to look at him - your worried expression instantly softening at his apologetic features.

“You shouldn’t have to apologize for wanting to help people Steve, I’m just being paranoid.” You brushed it off, moving your hand to fix a strand of his hair that was sticking up. 

Steve sighed and shook his head, “I understand that,”  He said, catching your wrist to keep some sort of contact - something that caused your stomach to flutter slightly. “But we will make it out of this, and everyone else will too. I promise.” He said, sticking out his pinkie for a pinkie promise - one of dozens you’d made with him.

You tried to fight back the smile on your face as you twisted your pinkie with his, “I trust you.” You finally responded, letting yourself smile. 

“Good, good, because you also just agreed to a sleepover when this is all over - I wanna see what you can do with my hair.” He teased, causing you to laugh. 

“Ok, ok, but if you hate it don’t cry.” You said with a smile. “Goodnight, Steve.” You finally said, rather softly, as you opened the door to your home. 

“Goodnight, Y/N.” He responded, walking down the sidewalk back to his house. There was a part of you that wanted to follow after him, ask him to stay with you or kiss him or something - it was almost always in the back of your head when he said goodnight. But you knew you couldn’t do that, so you just shut your front door and ran to the living room. Contrary to mocking annoyment at the idea of you not trusting him to walk down the sidewalk, you’d feel bad if you didn’t watch to make sure someone didn’t get him. 

Once you knew he had made it back home, you sighed and walked  to your bedroom, changing into what you typically slept in and slipped into bed. On a normal day, you might take a shower and watch a movie or something. But tonight you just wanted to go to bed, everything you had learned about the mall that day had just been too much.

The sound of your alarm clock startled you awake as you got out of bed, changing what you usually wore to work and turning to go outside. You were met, as you usually were, by the sight of Steve sitting in his car waiting for you to finish getting ready. 

“So, what are we doing today?” You asked him, sliding into the passenger seat and wrapping the seatbelt around you as you clicked it in place.

“I’m not sure, I’ll let you know if something happens but… I’ll just let you know.” Steve seemed to trail off, doing a U-Turn to turn back the way he had driven the previous night. For a moment it almost seemed like he didn’t want you involved, similar to how you didn’t particularly want him involved, but there you both were - directly in the middle of the Russian conspiracy theory. 

As you arrived at the mall, you left your bag in the car - again, as you usually did. Normally, you would be talking to Steve on the way in, but both of you seemed rather tense.

“It feels wrong going in here… I feel like we’re gonna be like-” You cut off, glancing around to make sure there was nobody that looked suspicious. “It feels like we might be… killed or something.” You finally said as you glanced over at Steve, walking into the mall with him, but a part of you wanted to turn around and never come back.

“It’ll be okay, they could have killed us last night probably if they thought we were on to them. I’m sure this is going to be fine.” He said, but he didn’t seem too assured. 

You nodded, though, because he really was right. The mall had your addresses from the checks being mailed home, if the Russians suspected that you knew something they could have had you killed already - and it made no sense to do something like that in a giant mall, especially when you lived so close together. 

“I’ll see you during our lunch break?” You questioned as you had reached Scoops Ahoy, Steve nodding in response. 

“Or earlier, if we find something and I have time to get you.” he responded, your heart almost dropping. 

“If you find something you need to get me, okay, or at least try- I don’t want you to get hurt I-” You were getting frantic again, keeping your voice down to not draw-awareness. 

“I will, but if something happens and you don’t see me during lunch promise you’ll come looking.” He said, watching as you nodded in response. You had to be realistic, something might happen and you might not be able to go together. “And you can’t pretend to be sick.” He said, as if reading a thought that may have crossed your mind.

“Alright.” You agreed reluctantly, waving a hello to Robin who you saw behind the counter and turning around, but for a moment something clicked in your brain. You might not see either of them for a while, if worse comes to worse. “Please stay safe, both of you.” You finally said as you turned back around, both of your close friends nodding before you walked to your job at The Gap.

The rest of the day you had basically spent most of the day folding clothes and answering customers questions, but your mind couldn’t help but wander. You were completely distant from everything that was going on, you couldn’t focus on anything. More than once you’d wanted to tell a customer to leave the mall, to never come back, because you felt like everyone was in danger at that moment. But you couldn’t. 

A while later, your lunch break started - as you walked over to Scoops Ahoy you noticed that neither Steve nor Robin were there, and you started to fear for the worst. 

It was a frantic scramble for the next few moments before you ran into someone, someone who grabbed your arms and pulled you in front of them.

“Hey-” 

“Steve? I th-”

“I know, I can explain, just come with me.” He said as he started guiding you over to a table. When you sat down, you noticed the people you were used to, at this point. Robin and Dustin, but you also noticed the inclusion of another new face. She looked familiar for a moment, before you placed that it was Erica Sinclair. 

“Why is-” You motioned to Erica, “Is she going to help us? What’s-” You were practically choking on your words, completely confused by what was going on as you felt Steve slide into the seat beside you. 

“We need someone to go through the vents to open the loading dock for us to get in, Dustin couldn’t fit and he thought he knew someone who could.” Robin explained, “And, she agreed in exchange for ice cream.” She added on.

You nodded along to what she said, wondering if it was a good idea to have her tagging along but knowing that if there was no other option there was no reason why the rest of you couldn’t just watch after her. 

The rest of the day was finished somewhat normally, with the looming knowledge that you would be getting into Russian equipment as soon as the mall closed. 

Ironically, you finished work early for the first time in a while. Your co-workers had been a little too diligent in making sure everything was stocked for the next day, granted, your supervisors had told you to be extra diligent for the next few days since it was the week of the holiday. While it meant that everything was going to be done sooner than it would have been otherwise, it also meant that you needed to break into Russian information sooner.

You quietly walked to where Scoops Ahoy was, you shouldn’t have been as paranoid as you were about going to see your friend who drove you home anyway - but with the given circumstances you felt like everything that you were doing was completely out of the ordinary. 

“You’re here early.” Robin commented from behind the counter as she jumped on top of the stand, sliding across it. 

“We finished early, I don’t think anyone else is still here though.” You said as you glanced around the empty mall. “Even if they are, I don’t think anyone’s going to notice us climbing on the roof.” 

It was only a few minutes later before Dustin, Robin, Steve and yourself departed for the rooftop outside of the loading deck - Erica moving for the vents that would allow you all to enter from that part of the building. 

As you laid on the rooftop, making sure to be as close to the roof as possible as to not draw any attention if there were to be someone who could be paying attention to any of you, you couldn’t help but feel like you shouldn’t be doing what you were doing.

There was just this feeling in your brain, this feeling that maybe this was wrong and that none of you should be involved. But, before you could allow your mind to wander too far with that idea the dock was open, and you were all climbing down the latter and walking quickly and quietly into the building before shutting the door behind you. 

It was eerie being inside of this part of the mall, surrounded by these boxes that you’d seen being walked through the mall and thought nothing of. Seeing them knowing that they were something else, something that could pose a threat to yourself and everyone else that you happened to know. 

You kneeled next to the boxes, watching as Steve opened one of them with a box cutter. You nearly jumped as you told Dustin to get back, but you did not expect him to tell you to get back. 

“If you die I die.” Dustin responded to Steve’s criticism, his firm tone seeming to surprise everyone - including you. 

“I agree with Dustin, if you die I die too.” You commented, high fiving Dustin above Steve’s head.

Steve seemed to blink for a moment, “Okay then.” He finally said, glancing between the both of you before twisting one of the tubes inside of the box and pulling it out.

You all stared in awe of the green, shining liquid-type thing inside of the jar that Steve was holding, having no clue what it could possibly be that he was holding.

Before you had the chance to tell him to put it down you all felt the room begin to move, only for a moment, before everyone started rushing to get the door opened. But the door didn’t seem to want to open. 

You let out a yell as you saw the walls begin to close in, and felt the room start shooting downwards. You fell over on top of one of the boxes, hitting your hip and most likely leaving a bruise. 

As soon as the room stopped, you slowly stood up. Of course, you quickly pieced together that what you were in wasn’t a room at all - but rather an elevator where the Russian’s happened to be keeping their things. Now, not only were you deep below the ground, but the doors to the elevator were completely covered over by a metal wall. 

As soon as you stood up, moving to stand with everyone else, you felt the need to collapse back onto the ground in some sort of defeat. “I didn’t think this was how we were going to die, of all the ways.” 

Steve kneeled in front of you, “We’re not gonna die, we just have to find a way out of here.” he tried to reassure you as he stood back up and started looking around for something. You assumed he was looking for some kind of emergency switch or exit, or maybe a way to get above the elevator in order to get out. 

But that kind of idea was quickly shot down, realizing that this might as well have been a metal box that you were all stuck in. There didn’t seem to be a way out.

“Maybe someone will come back in the morning, we could just…” You trailed off, making the motion of running your finger over your throat. 

“We are not going to kill whoever comes in here, Y/N.” Robin replied, a nearly disappointed look on her face at the way that your mind had instantly gone to that. 

“My point still stands, someone is probably going to come in here for whatever that green shit is tomorrow, if we hide I’m sure there will be a way to hold the door open. Better yet, maybe it’ll just go back up.” You said, feeling as if your brain was finally clicking into place. Most likely because this wasn’t the first time you were in a life or death situation, and truthfully it wasn’t the scariest either. 

“But what if they don’t come back for like… a week or something for another delivery.” Dustin added on, but you shook your head.

“That thing can’t just be sitting here, they’ve gotta do something with it I’m sure.” You said confidently. Maybe you weren’t too confident that someone was going to come back tomorrow, maybe someone wouldn’t be back for a few days, but you didn’t want to think about that. 

“In the meantime, though, we should try to find a way out in case whoever comes back tomorrow knows that we’re here.” Robin said, something that you couldn’t help but agree with.

It was about two hours before you had just given up, deciding that you most likely weren’t going to find a way out as everyone has scoured every inch of the elevator that you were stuck in. You gave the ‘Open Door’ button one last press before sliding back against the wall, a yawn escaping your lips as you leaned your head back. 

You felt someone beside you, and turned to find Steve sitting next to you, a defeated look on his face. “We’re not gonna die here,” You said. But you weren’t sure if you were saying it in an attempt to reassure yourself or to reassure Steve.

“Even if we do get out…” He trailed off, seemingly not wanting to think about what could happen next. “We were just supposed to come in here and leave. Not… get stuck down here.” He seemed frustrated and somewhat exhausted.

“We came down here to stop bad people from doing bad things, it just went a little wrong.” You said, wanting to bring some kind of hope into the discussion. But even before you didn’t have much hope that just the few of you could do much of anything, and now you’d all gotten stuck in an elevator.

“I didn’t want you down here with all the Russians, you know that right?” Steve asked, turning to look at you as you finally met his eyes. “I know you didn’t even want to be involved with this and if you get killed ‘cause of me-” 

“It’s not that I didn’t want to be involved, it’s that I didn’t want you to get hurt. It was never about me.” You said rather softly, watching his expression seemingly change for a moment as he got ready to do or say something - which one, you weren’t sure - but he seemed to stop himself when you let out another yawn.

“You can sleep, Y/N, I won’t let anything happen to you - I promise.” He said, sort of comfortingly as he wrapped an arm around you and let you rest your head gently on his shoulder.

“Goodnight Stevie.” You mumbled as you quickly fell asleep, the exhaustion from working and the stress of the day and the current situation being enough to effectively knock you out. 

It was only another few hours before you woke up at the feeling of movement, not really doing anything about it until you eventually heard the sound of a door opening. You were concealed by a box, and thankfully whoever had come in wouldn’t be able to see you. As you came to a bit more, you noticed Steve slide a box in between the doors that had opened to stop them from closing again. 

You followed everyone out of the room, “Nothing happened while you were asleep.” Dustin said from in front of you, your eyes moving over as you realized he was speaking to you. 

“Well, I figured, we were locked in a room - but I guess you never know.” You responded, quietly, as you walked down the hallway - your eyes practically running around the room as you made sure that there was nobody in there with you. 

It was a little while longer, everyone walking down corridors and you mostly being quiet out of fear that someone was going to hear you, that you would speak at the wrong time.

Eventually you reached what seemed to be some sort of communication room, but as you walked in you were face to face with a Russian Soldier. You froze for a minute, before searching for some sort of blunt object that you could use - for a moment considering throwing your shoes at the man. But Robin distracted him by reiterating the Russian code to him, and Steve seemed to think quick enough to knock the man out. 

“Good thinking,” You said as you turned to Robin - before your eyes began scanning the room. Finally, they found a door, and you walked with Robin to it, assuming that the others were following.

“Thanks,” She trailed off, seemingly distracted as she pushed open a door. You stood in shock of what you were staring at, the other three following you both into the room as Robin motions them in.

“Shit…” You trailed off, your brain connecting what you were looking at. Of course this had to be the reason that they were in a small town like Hawkins, seeing it before you made everything make perfect sense. Or, as much sense as a situation like this could possibly make to someone with a limited understanding of any of it. 

Quickly, you all made your way out of the room, looking for an escape before Erica noticed that the Russian soldier was no longer with Steve. By the time you’d all realized, though, it was too late. 

The only thing that you could do was run as fast as your feet could carry you, following after the other four. But you couldn’t be shocked that you were outnumbered, and try as you might to look for any type of exit it was obvious to you that there wasn’t going to be a safe exit - at least not for everyone.

You watched as Dustin and Erica quickly walked over to a vent, Steve pushing you toward them. “Go! It’ll be safer-”

“I can handle myself, Steve.” You replied back, urgently trying to get back over to the door with Robin. 

“It’s not about that, just go I don’t need you to di-”

“No! Not without you!” You finally yelled back, Steve seeming to stop for a moment before accepting that there wasn’t enough time to convince you to go with Dustin and Erica. You watched as they got away, knowing at that moment that your choice had been completely solidified. 

The next thing you knew, there was a swift punch to your face - the world going black, and all of the commotion surrounding you seeming to just fade away. 

You weren’t sure how long it was before you woke up again, but you seemed to come to your senses rather quickly. The room you were shoved into was rather small, almost like a mop closet but it was completely empty - a flickering fluorescent being your only form of light. There was no one with you, for a couple seconds, that is. 

Within a few moments of waking up a man walked into the room, leaving the door slightly ajar behind him as you turned to you with a smug expression.

“You put up quite a fight, you know.” the man commented, much to your dismay.

“I can’t… I don’t remember that.” You responded, which, again to your dismay, made him seem to laugh for just a moment as your confusion.

“No, you wouldn’t, we’ve already injected you with the serum we’re about to give your friends.” He said, glancing down at you for a moment, seemingly at your body. “Have you looked at yourself?” The commented, again, with a smug expression on his face.

It was then that you glanced down, multiple knife wounds on your body, blood covering the front of your shirt. “Wh-”

“The serum will stop the pain for a little while, but if you don’t start telling the truth soon…” He trailed off, moving closer to you and pressing down on the wound that you could only assume was a stab, though it felt as if it was covered by a bandage, “You’re going to regret it.” 

You watched as blood pooled around where he was pressing, but the serum was strong enough to make it only feel like an intense pressure, almost like getting a root canal at the dentist's office - you know something terrible is happening, but can only kind of feel it. 

At that moment you could only realize: he had mentioned your friends. “Where are they, where did you take them.” You grunted out, almost instinctively reaching for the man’s neck as he moved back.

“It wouldn’t matter if I told you, the way things are going - they’re not going to make it out of the day.” he responded, his thick Russian accent making his words harder to understand - but you understand perfectly clear what he was trying to say.

“If you don’t fucking tell me where they are I swear to God I will fucking bite you- I will bite your Adam’s Apple out you son of a-” That was enough to make the man swiftly slap you across the face, standing up and waling to the door. 

“If you don’t want the easy way… I guess I’ll just send in the doctor.” He said, walking out of the room and leaving you alone.

As you stood up to look for some way out, assuming there had to be a way, you narrowly dodged a vent falling from above you. “Dustin?!” You whisper-yelled, watching as he dropped from the vent and onto the ground.

“What the hell happened to you?” He asked, taking in your bloodied form. 

“I don’t remember- Where’s Steve?” You asked him, watching as he moved toward the door with what appeared to be a couple bobby pins he had gotten from Erica. 

“We’re going to get him right now,” He started as the door unlocked. “How is it that you got stabbed and your first question is ‘where’s Steve’?” Dustin questioned as he peeked his head out of the door way before motioning for you to follow him out. 

You followed Dustin out, feeling the familiar pressure of the stab wound on your waistline - now that you were standing, it was clear that it was somewhere on the far left part of your hip - thankfully far away from any important organs. 

As you walked through the long corridors, making sure to avoid any hubs of people, you found yourself passing by the very room that you last remembered being in - before being brought to another interrogation room. Dustin prodded a man in a lab coat with a large, electrified metal rod before you both made quick work of untying Steve and Robin.

Despite your current bloodied and wounded state, you still found yourself getting a lump in your throat seeing the injuries that Steve had sustained. 

“You’re going to be okay, we’re all going to be okay.” You said once you had finally gotten the ties done on his hands - resting a hand on the side of his cheek for a moment before turning to Dustin. “You know how to get out of here?” You questioned, watching as he nodded in response. “Alright then, good.” 

You ran after Dustin, making sure Robin and Steve were behind you both as you got into the cart, leaning your head against the wall as you sat across from Steve and Robin.

You tilted your head at their current state, before remembering the mention of a serum - one you were supposed to have had, but you just assumed it was why you couldn’t remember anything that happened to you; that and the fact that it was probably working overtime to numb the pain of your wound. 

For the first time, you pulled your shirt up slightly. Your suspicion was correct, they had put a bandage over the wound. But it was flimsy at best, leaving a large patch of blood on your hip where you had been bleeding through. 

You dropped your shirt quickly, shifting uncomfortably as you followed everyone into the elevator. Maybe it was how quickly it was moving, or maybe it was just the natural span of the drugs, but you felt your head begin to pound, and with it you felt the stab wound for the first time; a sharp pain coming through as you let out a groan.

“You’re not looking too good,” Dustin commented as you looked over toward him with a slight glare. 

“I’ll meet you back at the movie theater, just let me run and get a first aid kit.” You responded, once you’d finally gotten out of the elevator. It felt odd being in the movie theater, having just escaped from a Russian lab directly under where you were at the moment. 

As soon as you stepped out you quickly made your way to The Gap, knowing that there was a first aid kit kept in the back. You reached your hand into the side of your bra, pulling out the store key that you kept in there and sliding it into the lock - twisting it and making a painful bolt for the back of the store.

Letting out another loud groan, you grabbed the first aid kit and basically dropped onto the ground, leaning against the wall for support as you hiked your shirt up and removed the bandage.

It was a painful process, trying to clean up the blood and tightly wrap a bandage on in a timely manner - but you managed, with perhaps less than a dozen cuss words uttered. 

As soon as you were finished, you reached into the kit and pulled out a few advil’s, doing your best to swallow them without water before locking the kit back up and making your way back out of the store - but as you looked down at your clothing you sighed and grabbed a shirt and jacket, changing quickly before walking back out. Stealing was wrong, but in this case you knew you would raise some sort of suspicion if you ran out covered in blood. You locked the store back up and left  to go to the movie theater. 

You didn’t end up making it all the way back as you found the scoops troop gathered outside of the bathroom. “Wh-”

“Long story,” Dustin cut you off as you all noticed people beginning to pour out of the movie theater. “Let’s go.” He said, and you followed after him.

“What happened to you, Dustin mentioned something about getting stabbed?” Steve questioned, watching as you turned to look over at him.

“Well… I got stabbed.” You said, almost teasingly as you walked out of the movie theater area with them. “I can’t believe this worked.” You said, a small grin of relief covering your face as you made your way to the door of the mall - but before you did, your hopes were immediately dashed by the men checking identifications at the door. 

You ran quickly through the crowd of people, running anywhere that you could possibly run to hide from the people following after you - as you finally jumped behind the scoops ahoy counter you hugged your knees to your chest, slowing your breathing as best as you could as you scooted in next to Steve.

It felt like your heart was going to beat out of your chest as you heard the last voice exit the movie theater, your head quickly turning to face Steve. He slowly moved his hand to slide into yours, you weren’t sure if he was attempting to calm your fears or his own but you didn’t care because in that moment it helped you. 

There was so much you needed to say, so much you knew you were never going to say as you heard the men’s footsteps draw closer to the countertop. But then the car started going off, and after the loud noise of an automobile crash you popped your head up to see the men having been crushed by a car. 

As you glanced up, you saw the rest of the party on the ledge above, your face breaking out into a grin as you stood up. “We’re alive!” You said, rather enthusiastically as you turned to look at Steve. He didn’t seem to have much time to respond as you quickly pulled him into a tight hug, the grin never leaving your face as you pulled back to look at him. “I really thought we were gonna die for like… the second time tonight and I-”

You were cut off as you felt him lean in to quickly press his lips against yours in an urgent kiss. It didn’t take more than a couple seconds for you to pull him closer - even if it just lasted for a few moments.

“I’m sorry, I just realized I had some unfinished business while we were about to die.” He said as he finally pulled back, a small smile covering your lips as you looked at him. 

“That’s crazy, because I felt the exact same way.” You said in a rather playful manner, your conversation cut short as you hear someone clear their throat.

“If you two are finished making out, we have a situation at hand.” Dustin commented, watching as you both begrudgingly got out from behind the counter and joined the rest of the group. You seemed to tune out the conversation though, your eyes settling on El. She seemed uncomfortable, you assumed at first she must just be hurting from the wound you noticed on her leg, but it seemed to be much worse than you had suspected. 

As soon as El collapsed to the ground you followed after her, before you noticed that something in her leg was moving. You were all going to have to act fast to figure out how you could help her, and Jonathan seemed to be the one that had figured out how. 

You did your best to calm the poor girl down, but you knew that it wasn’t going to end up working.because there was no way that she was going to end up feeling better with the amount of pain that she was clearly in at the moment. 

It was difficult for you to watch when Jonathan brought back the knife, even more difficult when you watched as the poor girl got her leg sliced into, his hand going in to dig out the intruder in her leg. You leaned back a bit when she decided to do it herself, moments away from asking if there was anything you could do before she ended up getting the thing out of her leg and throwing it to the side.

When you looked up, you noted that there was three more people in the room with you all - maybe this would be easier with them here. Maybe.

As you stood up from your place on the floor, you made your way over to sit beside Robin. “Are you okay?” You questioned as you turned to look at her, but she didn’t seem to have a solid answer. 

There was so much going on, and part of you didn’t even know how to comprehend it even though this wasn’t the first time that something like this had happened. You did your best to listen to the plans that were being made, but you figured it would be easier to just wait and see what you were going to end up doing.

You found out much sooner than expected as you left in a car with Robin, Steve, Dustin and Erica only moments later to go find a way for Dustin to guide Hopper, Murray and Joyce through the mall. 

You quickly walked out of the mall, your eyes widening as you turned to look at Steve. “I accepted King Steve, not too sure I’m down with Daddy Steve.” You teased as you got into the car. 

As you did Steve sent you a playful glare, “You know you love it, who wouldn’t.” He responded back with a grin and a teasing kiss on your cheek as he started up the car.

Despite the urgency of the situation, Dustin seemed vehemently opposed to just giving Steve some normal directions to where he was being expected to drive you all, but maybe it was easier this way in some sense. Not that you were sure what sense that was, but perhaps it was easier for Dustin. Or, perhaps he just wanted to be difficult. 

You were rather calm, feeling the breeze in your hair despite the situation as you drove down the country roads. But what you weren’t expecting at all was the drive up a literal grassy hill. 

You let out a shocked yelp at the feeling of the grass under the car, and the feeling like the car was about to roll off of the hill. Thankfully it didn’t, but as the car cut out and you sat in shock you slowly realized that the car wasn’t going to work any further. 

You all got out of the car, walking up the hill and sitting down next to Dustin’s communication machine, watching as he attempted to get into contact with Suzie. 

“You know, maybe Suzie is asleep-” You started, but held your hands up defensively as Dustin sent a cold glare your way. 

You sat rather calmly in the grass for a little while, your eyes moving up to watch the stars before you turned to glance again at Steve. “You know, I did mean what I said earlier.” Steve said as he scooted over to sit closer to you.

“That you think I love calling you Daddy Steve?” You questioned with a tone of bewilderment in your voice as you stared at him. 

“What? No, I mean… when I thought that we were going to die I just- I realized that I um… I had some unfinished business because i uh-” He seemed to cut himself off, not really knowing what to say without being awkward. 

“I don’t know exactly what you’re trying to say but I’m pretty sure I feel the same way I mean I was literally stabbed and I was all like ‘oh god- but what about Steve’.” You said, more awkward than you intended.

“It’s true, she was asking about you when I rescued her.” Dustin said, you motioning to him.

“See? I just-” You cut yourself off as you glanced down, your eyes finding that of the mall. “You see that too, right?” You questioned. Steve turned where you were looking and his eyes widened. 

“Uh… guys?” He said, pointing to the mall. 

Dustin began to frantically try to contact the people in Starcourt, but when he did all that you heard was the sound of a monstrous roar that was absolutely not Mike Wheeler, or anyone else in that mall. 

You and Steve seemed to have the same idea as you shared a glance and stood from your place on the ground, running down the hill without saying anything before Dustin questioned where you were going. You didn’t know what you were going to be able to do, just you Steve and Robin weren’t going to be able to save everyone. But you would be damned if you didn’t try, at the very least. There had to be something you could do, even if it was the move of a martyr. 

You quickly got into the car, watching as Steve struggled to get it started before backing up down the hill. You were surprised that it ended up working, but glad that you would be able to have something that would, hopefully, get you all to the mall quicker than you would have been able to get there on foot. 

As Steve sped to the mall, you found yourself fruitlessly trying to find a way to look at it and see something, anything, that was going on there - maybe even someone from the mall having escaped. But you found nothing, no matter how hard you looked. 

“Are there any weapons or something in here?” 

“No! No there’s nothing here I checked on the way.” Robin responded, seemingly as stressed out about this as you were. 

Once you made it to the parking lot you saw a car trying to crash into your friends, trying to escape from the mall. You recognized the car to be Billy’s, which was odd since you had no idea why he could possibly be there. 

You hopped out of the now destroyed car you were in, looking around for somewhere to go before you heard someone yell to get in. You quickly got into the back of the van with everyone else, listening to the communication channels as you finally heard the voice you had been waiting to hear; honestly thinking that it was probably not real.

“Suzie is real…” You trailed off, letting out a laugh at the sound of her singing with Dustin on the communication channel. While it hardly seemed to be the right time or place, you were absolutely not going to let Dustin live that down the next time that you saw him.

You all made your way back to the mall when the commotion stopped, when it seemed like everything was over, to make sure that everyone was okay. But when you got there, you quickly learned that both Billy and Hopper didn’t survive the attack. 

You covered your mouth with your hand, feeling tears well in your eyes - maybe it was the stress, maybe it was because Hopper who you’d known was dead, or because of how El was going to feel after losing him. But you felt absolutely distraught at the news. Steve pulled you into his side, pressing a light kiss to the top of your head before an EMT stopped in front of you. 

“Ma’am… you’re bleeding.” She said lightly, pointing to the wound on your hip. 

“Oh- Yeah I… um… long night would you-” 

She cut you off with an immediate nod, bringing you back to stitch up your wound. You insisted that you would be okay without going back to the hospital, and she very begrudgingly let you go so long as you weren’t going to be alone.

It was a rather short, and mainly silent, walk back home with Steve. As you stopped in front of your door, you turned to look at him. “Would you… um… come in?” You questioned, Steve nodding lightly as he followed you into your house and to your bedroom. 

Neither of you really had any interest in changing, the stress of the day being enough to make you not feel the need to change - you just wanted to lay down with Steve. 

As Steve laid down, pulling you under the covers as you rested your head in the crook of his neck, you felt him mumble something against your hair.

“What was that?” You questioned, your head moving up to look into his eyes.

“Earlier, I was trying to tell you that I love you and… thinking I was going to die without saying it… I was so scared.” he said, his eyes soft and genuine.

Your lips formed a smile, light, but all you could manage after the long day. “I love you too, Steve, I- I think I always have.” You said lightly, feeling him learn down slightly as you met him in the middle for a soft kiss. 

As you both pulled back you let out a sigh, “Does this count as our sleepover?” You asked playfully, Steve letting out a laugh as he shook his head.

“No, expect me over for dinner tomorrow night.” He said matter-of-factly as he looked at you.

“Fair… I don’t think I want to be alone for a little while anyway.” You said, a certain vulnerability showing that seemed to make Steve’s eyes soften.

“You never have to be alone, you know that right?” He asked, to which you nodded and pressed another soft kiss to his lips before resting your head once more. 

“Pinkie promise?” You asked softly, to which he held out his pinkie, your two fingers intertwining - a moment later just shifting to tangle your hands together. 

There were a lot of obvious reasons to fear staying in Hawkins, to resent the things that you were exposed to through the life that you had - nothing about it was normal. But you wouldn’t trade it for the world, because Steve was the only normalcy that you needed. You knew he would never leave, because for you both a pinkie promise meant forever.

[some-days-we-get-sundays]

prompt request: Sophie is jealous

There is a knock on the door to Mary and Ryan’s place. 

Mary goes to open the door and Sophie is standing on the other side looking amazing in a red blouse and black jeans. She also looks kind of sad but not in an unhappy way, more somber if anything with a lot going on in her eyes and an expression that Mary can’t quite read. Sometimes she wishes she had Alice’s skill of deciphering people. 

“Hey, Sophie. I thought you’d be with Kate. Did you go and see her?” Mary opened the door wider and allowed Sophie to walk in. The two women made their way to the couch. 

Sophie sighed as she slipped her shoes off and sat down. “Kate’s gone.” Mary made a face because she knew Kate was leaving again, off to the next great adventure. She had made peace with it. She was just happy that she got Kate back - the real Kate, and that she wasn’t dead. Mary still wakes up crying and drenched in sweat when she has dreams of Kate and her funeral. She would love for Kate to stay and for them to catch up, but it’s enough right now knowing that she’s alive and safe. And that she remembers who Mary is again. 

“Kate came and met me at The Hold Up. She had her stupid motorcycle helmet in her hands and said she was leaving. Going to go find Bruce and your dad.” Sophie rolls her eyes and her voice sounds even more raspy than usual. 

“Yeah, Kate told us she was going.” Mary thought Kate would at least stick around a bit longer for Sophie. “I’m sorry Soph. I know she loved you so much. She’s been through a lot and, I know the feeling. She needs time to figure things out. She’ll be back.” Mary tried to be comforting and give Sophie what she needed in this moment, even though she wasn’t too sure exactly what it was Sophie needed. But she rubbed her back anyway and went to put on some water for tea. She felt like this was more of a tea moment than a let’s get hammered and solve clues under the direction of a mad man moment. 

Mary came back a few moments later with tea in hand. 

“You know, you should really start leaving some clothes over here to hang out in. If you weren’t so tall I’d say you could borrow something of mine. I feel a girls night coming on.” Mary said and laughed softly. Sophie brought her tea to her lips, blew on it, and then set it back down. “I might have shorts that would fit you, and Ryan has some oversized sleep shirts. You could borrow something.” Mary thought out loud.

“I don’t know if Ryan would want me over here getting that comfortable.” Sophie didn’t actually mean this, she knew her and Ryan were in a much better place. Sophie offered Ryan her couch to crash on. They were no longer Crowie and the Ex-Con with no future. They were really starting to just become Sophie and Ryan. Wildmoore. 

“Oh come on, you and Ryan are tight now. Don’t think I haven’t noticed you two being a lot nicer to each other.” Mary lightly bumped her shoulder into Sophie’s. 

“Where is Ryan anyway?” Sophie asked attempting to be nonchalant. She picked up her tea and blew on it some more as a distraction and to help with her façade of appearing uninterested. 

“Um, I think she went to go meet with Imani.” Sophie sputtered and almost spilled her tea. 

“Woah girl, you alright?” 

“Yeah, just, this was way hotter than I was expecting.” Sophie laughed awkwardly and tried to recover. “She’s with Imani?” Sophie pressed out her bottom lip in consideration before her next comment. “I thought they were over?” Sophie didn’t know for sure if Ryan and Imani were over but ever since Luke got shot, she and Ryan were spending a lot more time together and Imani was nowhere to be found. Ryan hadn’t even mentioned her. Unless Ryan and Imani just sexted and spent late nights together. Sophie found herself annoyed with the thought of Ryan and Imani spending late nights together and sexting.

“Um I don’t know actually now that you mention it. I mean you were there when I told Ryan I don’t want to be included in her little sexcapades so maybe that’s why we haven’t heard from the two of them as of late.” Mary offered. Sophie was quiet. So Mary kept talking to fill the silence. “But Imani is cool, you’d like her.” 

“I know Imani is cool Mary, she saved us from jail with her fancy lawyer knowledge. Besides, Ryan wouldn’t date somebody uncool. I mean except for Angelique.” Sophie said as an after thought.

“Ohhh you didn’t like her either!?” Mary exclaimed and put her hand on Sophie’s shoulder.” Mary laughed joyously. “Whew I thought I was the only one! Girl maybe we do need to get out the hard stuff from the cupboard!” She gave Sophie a look letting her know that she was down to turn up whenever she said the word.

“It’s not that I didn’t like her. She just wasn’t good enough for Ryan.” Sophie said matter-of-factly. Mary sat there in stunned silence at Sophie’s admission. But before she could say anything, Sophie tried to clarify. 

“I-I just meant like she’s Ryan Wilder, bad ass extraordinaire, Batwoman by night and day, bartending babe on the side. Angelique was just bringing Ryan down. I never saw it until I got to know Ryan and realized she was always covering for Angelique, and Angelique was taking advantage of Ryan’s kindness and the emotional attachment that was there from when they were kids. Ryan felt like she owed Angelique, when really it was the other way around. Ryan’s a good person. She deserves someone who knows that but doesn’t use it against her, someone like-”

“Someone like you?” Mary offered up slowly, testing the waters. 

“Are we singing Adele now?” Sophie went for a joke hoping that she was coming off as aloof. Mary just kept staring back at Sophie with a grin on her face. 

“Stop smiling Mary. Ok what? If you’re thinking I want to date Ryan, I don’t.” Sophie inwardly cringed as this sounded like such a lie even to her own ears. 

“Well it doesn’t sound like you want anyone else to have her.” Mary was feeling emboldened. Sophie didn’t seem mad, she just seemed either unaware or in denial. Mary continued, “you didn’t like Angelique, which I am with you on that one. And you sound jealous of Ryan spending time with Imani. So if all these girls that Ryan gets with upset you, then why don’t you just ask Ryan out? You just said she deserves better. You could be better.” 

Sophie took a long pause and stirred her tea. Seemingly gathering up courage to say what she was going to say. “Ryan and I are finally friends. It took so long for us to get to this place of genuine understanding and respect. I don’t want to throw dating her into the mix. And yes, ok, she’s gorgeous, like drop dead gorgeous- she is. But what if things go horribly wrong and then we’re back to square one. Or even worse, we don’t even talk anymore because we hate each other so much. I don’t want to take that risk. I care about her too much.” Mary sat there with her eyes wide and a shit eating grin on her face. She had no idea Sophie had all these feelings. She thought at the very most Sophie was just crushing. 

“Oh my gosh, you totally love her!” Mary squealed.  

“Shut up Mary. I don’t.” Sophie got up to bring their empty tea cups to the kitchen and to try and calm her nerves and distance herself for a second from Mary’s prying and absurd accusations. 

“You love her! You love her! You love her!” Mary repeated trying to get Sophie to admit it.

 At that moment the door suddenly opened and in walked Ryan. 

Mary froze and Sophie came out of the kitchen to see who it was. She had a fleeting thought that it would be Kate and that maybe she had changed her mind and decided to stick around. Sophie then had another fleeting thought that Ryan and Mary should possibly change the locks. Just incase Kate isn’t Kate again or something.  

“Um who loves who?” Ryan grinned as she came inside and closed the door. She kicked off her shoes and ran a hand through her loose curls. Sophie came back and sat on the couch. Her and Ryan gave each other quick smiles. The energy between them was so different than it had been only a few short months ago. Before, Ryan would have been demanding to know why there was a crow in her loft. 

“Kate loves Sophie.” Mary quickly covered. 

“Oh.” Ryan simply said and walked off to her room. Mary and Sophie looked at each other with nervous expressions. Not soon after Ryan left she was back in an oversized shirt and some sleep shorts. Sophie had to try hard not to slowly run her eyes up and down Ryan’s entire body. That girl was banging. 

“So how is Imani?” Sophie awkwardly and quickly tried to take the attention off of herself and change the subject. She was still curious where Imani came from and how long she was going to be staying. Ryan shot Mary a look, and Mary put her hands up in mock surrender. “Hey, I barely said anything. Sophie asked where you were and I said you were with Imani.” Now it was Sophie’s turn to shoot Mary another glare. Ryan was smiling wildly and looking between the two. She hadn’t realized that she was the topic of conversation while she was gone.

“So, you been asking about me huh Soph?” Ryan teased. 

“Girl please. It was just so peaceful and quiet over here so I was just making sure you weren’t getting yourself into trouble somewhere.” Sophie quipped. 

“Oh I was definitely getting into trouble.” Ryan shot back with a smug look on her face. “I was getting into a very sexy kind of trouble, I got into trouble maybe 3 of 4 times actuall-”

“Ok we get it Ryan.” Sophie snapped. “I mean, we get it.” Sophie said a little softer this time. Then without warning Sophie got up, hurriedly walked to the door, opened it, and rushed out, slamming it shut as she left. 

Inside the loft, Ryan and Mary gave each other puzzled looks and Ryan pointed to the door as if to say, what was all that about. “You should go after her.” Mary said simply and then retreated to her room. Ryan shook her head in confusion and then went to find Sophie.

Ryan didn’t have to go far as Sophie was sitting just outside the door against the wall. Ryan stood in front of her. Sophie didn’t look up so Ryan slid down next to Sophie against the wall. Ryan put her hand on Sophie’s knee and now the ball was in Sophie’s court. Ryan patiently waited and hoped that Sophie would share what was bothering her. Sophie had been there for Ryan this whole year, and Ryan wanted to return the favor. Sophie looked up with pools of water in her autumn colored eyes threatening to spill and Ryan’s heart broke just a bit. Sophie was always so strong but Ryan didn’t want or need her to be. Sophie was allowed to break and fall apart, and in that moment, Ryan vowed to always be there to catch her and help pick up the pieces when she did. 

“I’m sorry for running out like that.” Sophie said quietly and sniffled. 

“Soph, you do not need to apologize.” Ryan reassured her. They were quiet again for a few beats. 

“So, you really like Imani.” It wasn’t a question, more like an observation. 

Is that what this is about, Ryan thought. Is Sophie- is she jealous? That can’t be right. If she was jealous that would mean... Ryan looked over again slowly at Sophie. 

“Imani is great.” Ryan started. She watched as Sophie sunk into herself more at that statement. Ryan continued, “but it’s not serious. It’s just sex and comfort and the closeness of somebody. I know I talk a big game and don’t get me wrong, being Batwoman is amazing, it’s everything I’ve ever dreamed, but it’s lonely. And whoever I’m with I can’t even share myself fully with them. I think I’m going to break it off with her anyway.” Ryan was thinking out loud at this point. Up until now she didn’t mind having a fling with Imani, it kept her company. But like her and Luke had discussed, it was hard dating and being a Superhero. And if Sophie was into her...

“Kate left.” Sophie said suddenly. Ryan sighed. She looked at Sophie, put a finger up to her cheek and caught a stray tear that was sliding down the side of her face. “I know.” Ryan said. She wiped her damp finger on her sleep shirt. 

“I think I’m... relieved.” Sophie finally said. This surprised Ryan. She thought Kate was the love of Sophie’s life. 

"She was the love of my life, but I think the key word is, was.” Sophie said as if reading Ryan’s mind. “I think I loved who she used to be. When she came back I was different and so was she. And when she took off again, I realized I wasn’t all that upset or hurt. It took losing her to realize that while I loved and cared deeply for her, she’s not my soul mate. She represents a time in my life that is special but it’s not where I am anymore. And then I met someone named Ryan Wilder.” Sophie smirked and looked into Ryan’s wide shocked eyes.

“Me?” Ryan said with the cutest look on her face that Sophie had ever witnessed. 

“Yes you. Ryan, you annoyed the hell out of me, you pissed me off, you irritated and enraged me-” 

“Ok girl, damn. We get it.” Ryan rolled her eyes. Sophie let out a raspy chuckle and continued. 

“You challenged me, you made me see things that I didn’t want to see within myself and within the Crows. You inspired me, you amazed me, and you thrilled me. I wanted to be a better me because of you Ryan. And then when I found out that you were Batwoman...I  knew I had it in me to fight the system in the way that you do. And I could no longer keep working with the same people who you were trying to take down. I had to pick a side. And I’m team Ryan.” Sophie smiled. 

Ryan laughed and lightly shoved her. “You’re team corny. But thank you. Thank you for choosing me.” Ryan said turning serious for a moment, but she couldn’t stop another grin from overtaking her features. 

“I’ll always choose you, Ryan.” 

Ryan visibly swallowed and then she looked at Sophie. “So, you really do have a thing for women in suits, huh.” Ryan teased. 

“I have a thing for you.” Sophie retorted. 

“Wow, just getting right to it huh?” Ryan flirted back. Sophie shrugged, “I want you Ryan. And I don’t want to step on Imani’s toes or anything but-”

Sophie felt warm, soft, wet lips press against her own. She instinctively flinched and then closed her eyes and sunk into the feeling of Ryan’s lips pressed against her own. Sophie immediately sucked and pecked at Ryan’s bottom lip and then she dipped her tongue into Ryan’s mouth, she let Ryan dip her own tongue out and she lightly sucked on it while Ryan sucked and kissed Sophie’s top lip. She felt Ryan’s hands in her hair and so she moved her hands to Ryan’s waist, and slipped them slightly under the oversized shirt Ryan was wearing. She had wanted to feel Ryan’s abs for quite some time now. Ryan smelled like shea butter, lavender, and eucalyptus. Sophie’s senses were shooting into overdrive. A cough interrupted them as someone walked by. They both realized they were still sitting out in the hall. 

“We should go inside.” Sophie said and then laughed. Her face was flushed and her blouse that was tucked into her jeans was now hanging loosely untucked. They got up and opened the loft door and saw Mary race to the couch. 

“Um hey guys.” Mary tried sounding as casual as possible. “You guys wanna stay up and chat?” Mary offered. She wanted all the tea and it was worth a shot. Ryan and Sophie knew they had been caught. 

“Goodnight Mary. Oh, and Sophie’s staying over.” Ryan said as she walked Sophie to her room. Mary noticed Ryan held Sophie’s fingers gently in her hand. Mary squealed. 

“Details! I want details in the morning! And pancakes.” Mary shouted as an after thought. 

“Deal.” Ryan said as her and Sophie giggled and Ryan closed her bedroom door behind them. 

[iarixai]

Over the Garden wall

Ok screw it im talking about ‘Over the Garden Wall’

For the entirety of otgw something always felt off all the time. And the end just gave me more questions. So spoilers, here is my theory on the unknown. also TW I am going to be talking about death and hospitals.

I don’t actually think the unknown is purgatory. Everybody there came back to the real world. However I do think you can only go there if you have a near death expierence. The reason I think this is because of Greg. Greg is very young that means his body isn’t very strong. That means if he really died in the river and then was brought back at the hospital, his body probably couldn’t handle it. It would be a miracle if his body could handle it. As well, everybody Greg and Wirt met in the Unknown were in the past, and didn’t have access to the resources modern hospitals have. But we see them all come back. That is why I think they almost died.

I think the Unknown can only be accessed when you are in a near death situation. For example,

- Beatrice and her family could have very well starved to the point to almost dying.

- The woodsman woke up in a blizzard, so he could have almost frozen to death.

- We know its halloween (fall) so Greg and Wirt could of had hypothermia.

Now you must be saying, Ari, what about the other inhabitants. Well, the main similarity between the characters i mentioned is that they were trying to leave The Unknown. The other characters didn’t seem to want to leave the unknown and had a life there. A good bunch of them had jobs too. Well, they are all dead in my opinion. Because they didn’t want to leave.

- Pottsfield seemed very happy in their cult, and since they are all skeletons, I think they have been there so long their bodies have started to decay. 

- the Tavern folks were all cheery and happy and had jobs.

- The animal school people seemed to be having a normal life. With their own problems.

- The tea company couple seemed very happy with their wealth and with each other

But there comes another hole in this theory, Pottsfield. They have been there so long that their bodies have started to decay and that is why they use the pumpkins as a body. Well, the Unknown doesn’t really exist on a plane of time or at least our plane of time. While yes, stuff does occur and people have proper memories of a timeline. Its not the same as our timeline. You can see this with Beatrice, the woodsman, and Greg and Wirt meeting in the same general time, but they are all from different eras. Its another plane of existance, with its own timeline running on whatever shape or line it is. So while there is passage of time in the unknown, it is seperate from our passage of time. The Unknown picks up its residents at different times on our timeline, at random times. That is why Pottsfield is decaying, but Beatrice is still a Highschool age girl when Wirt meets her. 

Also time dialation. From when Greg and Wirt fall into the river, to when they wake up in the hospital. At most that time would be 1 maybe even 2 hours if I am being generous. But the expierences in the Unknown would have lasted at least 1 or 2 weeks. I personally think one month. That would mean the plane of time and space they were on was not the same as their own. And it was all real, as we see with the frog with the bell in its stomach. Thats because its another plane of existance, grabbing people from our universe.

And the final nail in the coffin for the theory that the Unknown is a seperate plane of existance. The moon. When Greg and Wirt are walking to Pottsfield, which is North, they are walking towards the moon. And the moon was in a moon cycle not possible on earth. As well, if they were walking towards the moon, they would be going East or West. And seeing as they eventually make it to Pottsfield going that direction, that means they aren’t on Earth.

Now, the question is how does the Unknown choose its victims. For one, there has to be a near death expierence like I said before, but if it was every single one, the Unknown would be very crowded, which it doesn’t seem to be at all. Most of the residents are animals. But for now we are talking about humans. I think the Unknown chooses you when you feel small. When you feel forgotten about or everybody has forgotten about you. When you feel you have no hope. When you feel like nobody is going to help you. When you feel like people don’t care about you. For example,

- The woodsman felt like there was no hope for his sick daughter, and that people even forgot about them. 

- Beatrices family if my starvation theory holds true, felt out of luck and they had no hope because it was winter and they couldn’t grow any food to eat

- Greg and Wirt were running from the cops, and literally jumped over a garden wall in order not to get caught. And Wirt definitely has some insecurities about his worth as a person and whether people will actually remember

- The tea couple both show signs of narcissism, meaning they got all of their money so that people would pay attention to them and not forgotten about.

- The schoolteacher shows signs of measuring her worth on her accomplishments, hence why she gets really sad about her boyfriend leaving and how the animal school is not working. 

- The tavern people don’t even have proper names. They don’t feel important to the story which is why they introduce themselves with their job. They were meant to be forgotten about. 

The reason I say this is because of the short OTGW was based on, had the Tome of the Unknown, and it had everything that was forgotten about in it. 

But we have one more thing to address, and that is Greg.

But Greg doesnt seem to be a likely canidate to be lost in the Unknown right?

He doesn’t fit those requirments?

Wrong!

Greg is shown to have memory issues or having later reactions to things. That is why the frog seems to have a new name every episode, Greg forgot. And Greg knows that he has these memory issues. He may be a kid but he isn’t dumb. So I think he fears that these memory problems is going to make him forget about the people he loves, most of all his brother. So in that, he tries to please them in anyway possible. He raked his neighbors yard. He tried to get Wirt a date. In the boat episode, he is even willing to have his head drummed on so his friends will stay safe. When Wirt complains about Greg not leaving a trail, right after, Greg starts to leave a candy trail. Greg wants the people he loves to be happy incase he forgets about them. That is why Greg is willing in the last episode to sacrifice himself for his brother. 

And the final thing to address is the trees and animals. As we know, the trees are actually souls that have already died, and the woodsman collecting them is using their souls for oil in the lamp.  The Beast is a very obvious metaphor for death, more specifically the death of the hope they are going to survive, and through the trees that is how he carries out his duty of killing people in the Unknown because they died in there plane of existence. 

But I think the animals are people who have been in the Unknown long enough to start losing hope.That is why a lot of the animals have some sort of sentience. They aren’t animals, they are people. When we meet Beatrice she is pretty obviously a Bluebird. That is because her and her family aren’t very hopeful they are going to make it out of the Unknown. Her only chance is to find someone who lady Adelaide wants. 

As for the pets who come along on the journey, I have literally no explanation for that, unless the pets were tied to their owners souls. That is the only reason I can find.

The actual people in the series are still inbetween death and life, they still have hope they are going to live. Remember time dialation and the other plane of existance. But all the people who go into the Unknown and stay, will eventually become trees or animals. 

Now leaving the Unknown is a task in itself. But after the main cast left to Unknown, they got some sort of wish granted after the got back. The woodsman had his daughter get better and even being able to walk. Beatrice and her family got food. Wirt finally got that date. And Greg got to see his brother happy. The lack of these things also almost got them killed. So I think after they came back, the universe fixed those things, so that they wouldn’t go into the Unknown again, and give them hope, that their life is going to get better. While yes, they definitely did have hope before, this gives them hope about their lives and loved ones, not just their life not being in danger. 

I know this might have been really long and confusing. You can always ask me to clarify. But thank you for making it this far. 

[goth-girlfriend]

Endeavor’s Intern

(3/?)

Request: Quotev

Pairing: Enji Todoroki/Endeavor x Reader

Type: fluff,

Warnings: Reader is a student, even though that was clarified in the beginning.

(If there is any misspelling or improper grammar I apologize in advance.)

💙❤️🖤💙❤️💙🖤❤️💙💙❤️🖤💙❤️💙🖤❤️💙

“Nani!?” A mans voice screamed.

I tilted my head watching whatever drama Todoroki played on the secretaries computer.

She called in sick so we’ve both been manning the desk. So on my third day, I’m doing exactly what I threw a tantrum about not wanting to do.

“Wait wait wait,” I paused the show, “So, his wife is pregnant?”

“Yes?” Todoroki answered.

“But He had a vasectomy four months ago.” I pointed out.

He looked at me, a blank expression, I looked back and his eyes widened slightly. “What a scandalous woman you are Sakura Tsukino.” He looked at the screen and went to push play.

I smiled and shook my head, I leaned my head into his shoulder and went back to watching.

“Who do you think she cheated with?” He asked as her husband sat down and hurried his face in his hands.

“Hinata, that guy from her work space.” I mumbled staring as she broke into tears after her husband told her about what he had done.

“That’s messed up, he was all, not good looking.” Shoto mumbled and sighed.

‘HOW COUKD YOU DO THIS TOME?!’ She screamed.

‘DO WHAT?! YOURE THE ONE WHO CHEATED ON ME! YOU SLEPT WITH ANOTHER MAN! AND YOU WERE GOING TO PLAY IT OFF AS MINE?! THIS IS RIDICULOUS!’

Her husband was standing and screaming back at her. I bit my lip becoming more interested.

“Divorce.” I said, as he pulled his ring off placing in on the table.

‘I should’ve never given you my heart, everyone told me you’d only turn out like, like this. I denied it I trusted you and believed you changed.’

He backed up to the door, ‘I was wrong.’

He left, the camera moved to her sitting on the sofa. Her elbows on her knees, she looked down, eyes dripping tears, body shaking.

The screen went black and asked to start the next episode.

“Oof.” Was all I said as Todoroki clicked next.

“W-” i was cut off by the phone ringing.

“Hello, Endeavor Hero Agencies how may I help you?” I asked.

Todoroki just eyed me and paused the show.

“Hello yes? This is I’m calling to talk to Enji Todoroki. I was given this number to get into contact with him.” It was a WOMAN.

“Oh, of course. Please hold, I’ll see if his line is busy.” I lied.

“Of course, thank you.” I put her on hold then mute and sighed sitting back.

“Being a Secretary is so hard.” I stretched in my chair.

“Yeah.” Todoroki said stretched.

“Let’s get something to drink, also someone has to tell your dad he has a call.” I yawned and stretched up.

“You do it.” Was all Todoroki argues back.

“Alright.” I didn’t even argue back.

I knew his office was free, the only people who showed up for a meeting had left already. So I walked into his office, he quirked his brow at me and then looked back down at his paper work. I walked over to his desk and looked at his phone. A red light was blinking, the lady was still on hold. Okay, this is great I walked around his desk and squeezed my way onto his lap. I smield up at him and he looked down at me. He hand little Endeavor and Todoroki sitting infront of his monitor blocked form public sight by a stapler.

“You have a lady on hold. She didn’t tell me what she’s calling for just that she’s trying to get in contact with you.” I sighed and leaned against his right shoulder.

“Did you get her name?” He asked.

“No, she just asked for ‘Enji Todoroki’ because she told she could get into contact with him.”

“Then Get her name and figure out what she wants. I can’t waste time on useless things.” He argues and rolled his chair closer to his seat.

My stomach and hips pressed against the edge of his desk as he got back to work. This man made a great booster seat not going to lie. I sighed and picked up his phone, taking it off of hold.

“Hello, are you still there ma’am?” I asked and leaned onto the desk.

Fingertips ghosted my right hip.

“Yes, I’m still here.

“Alright, I’m calling to ask for your name and purpose of call. Endeavor is a bit busy but is able to call you back in thirty to fourth minutes if you can leave a name, number and purrpose of call.” I lied to her easy.

“Oh well, I’m Inosu Nara, I’m calling because we met almost a month ago. He gave me this number to get into contact with him.” She answered.

“Alright, well thank you Ms.Nara, I’ll tell him what you’ve told me and you should get a call back from this number in about thirty minutes. Can I get your number?”

“Yes it’s xxx-xxx-xxxx”

Alright that should be everything I need.”

“Thank you.”

“No thank you for being patient and calling Endeavor Hero agencies.”

I ended the called and wrote down the number, Inosu Nara

“Inosu Nara.” I picked up the sticky note, “She says you meet a month ago and you gave her this number to call you.”

He tended a bit and his face turned into a scowl. Wait half an hour and then Call her back, tell her the position I was offering has already been filled.” His left has copied his right and grabbed my other hip.

“So....Why does Shoto watch romantic Dramas?” I asked and started to click away on Endeavors computers.

“What?” He asked.

“Watch this, it’s just three minutes it’ll summarize what he’s watching.” I said and pushed play.

He sat and watched, and cringed, he paused it halfway. “That’s Enough.”

“Yeah.” was all I said and moved to sit on his right thigh, my left side and shoulder to his chest.

“Have you ever been to Universal?” I asked and tilted my head.

“Once, I took all of my children for two days to film a commercial.” His answer was boring.

“Did you go on any of the rides?” I asked wanting to know if he liked it.

“No, I didn’t have time to do anything. I was being filmed and meeting fans.” He didn’t seem amused.

“Oh, well that’s boring.” I slouched and sighed.

We sat in silence, I was looking on my

Phone and just casually chilling. Endeavor was watching me, I could feel his stare. It was very intense but not in a scary way, more of a concentrated way.

I opened snap chat and smiled, “Take more puctures with me.”

His brows dropped, he didn’t seem interested at all. I ignored it and leaned into his chest and opens the filters. He didn’t smile exactly but he wasn’t wearing a serious expression either.

He looked cute with a flower crown. After about five minutes of me smiling and taking pictures and Endeavor slid his hand around my waist and pulled me against him. I didn’t know what to do, I just moved the side slightly and looked up at him.

His chin wa son my shoulder, the stubble of his beard rubbing on my neck. It hurt a bit, but it felt nice.

“No more.” He tried to push my phone down.

“Just one more.” I raised, “But you have to smile.”

I got the filter onto both of our faces, he had a forced looking smile, I’d take it, I had a plan anyways. I held down the button and moved to kiss right on and under his jaw bone. I felt his hands grip my hips harsh and he tended.

I smield agaisnt the skin I had just violated as he cleared his throat.

“What are you doing?” He asked and moved back to look at me.

“Spreading love.” I moved my phone and got us both into frame again, “Now really smile this time.”

I took his left hand in mine and a very faint smile came to his lips.

After that I saved the video once to snap and twice to my camera roll. Then I recorded another video, it was of mini Endeavor and Todoroki, and then I panned to him and he seemed unamused during me recording random moments. I even recorded him letting out a short chuckle as I told him a story of the first time a cat meowed at Todoroki and he panicked. It was such a beguiling sound.

I even caught the small smile he had and the joy in his eyes when I told him Todoroki actually remembered his birthday, and sent a message from a random number so he wouldn’t be caught. He smiled at the thought, a look of regret in his eyes, there was a sincerity.

“Well, I’m pretty sure it’s lunch time.” I said standing up.

“Can we go eat?” I asked looking at my phone for the time.

“Take the lunch orders for the floor, than you and Shoto can go.” I admired the way he leaned back into his chair, legs spread, arms resting on the arms rest and head falling to the side slightly.

“Yes sir.” I smiled and went to get a notepad and Shoto.

Lunch passed, time passed, Shoto and I watched more drama as we waiting for our patrol shift, we’d be on different sides of the city but that’s fine I guess. I mean we’re literally spending all day together just watching tv and eating.

I cut my noodles with my chopstick and swallowed quickly.

“I forgot to call that lady back!” I panicked, “I’ll do it tomorrow.”

Finally our turn for Paroels came, Shoto left, then a few others, familiar faces poured into the building taking a brief break from patrolling all day. I was waiting for Endeavor for my patrol to start. Finally he came down, I smiled at him and we took off. I had my cloak on and wings out. Everything was normal, it felt like just a walk. I mean, we stopped a break in at the most. Poor guy didn’t see it coming, he ribs definitely felt it before he knew what was coming. We carried on and ran into Hawks and Tokoyami. He didn’t leave, so our duo turned into a squad. We kept patrolling, nothing really happening, Hawks said something about it being to quiet lately around the city. Endeavor agreed, that was until we sat on a roof top, well, I stood on the edge, Endeavor was siting at a bench table, Hawks was walking on the edge and Tokoyami was leaning against the stair exit wall.

“We should become a squad.” Hawks said as he stopped to my right.

I looked at him, “what?”

“Imagine how cool we’d be, we could call ourselves the fire birds.” He took my hands and spun us both, to get read Incase I fell i spread my wings out quickly, the sound of fluttering and wind being pushed out from behind me was all I heard as I looked at Hawks.

“Get it? Because Endeavor is fire, I’m Hawks” he spread his wings, “Tokoyami has a bird in his belly, and you also have bird wings, I feel like your hiding more from what we know but I won’t push it yet.” He was still holding my hands in his.

“Well, it’s an interesting name. But I don’t think it’d work out.” I shrugged.

He pouted, “Why not?”

I shrugged, “Well, I don’t know actually l, we don’t always have the same patrol hours.” I shrugged.

“I see,” he spun us again and I kept my wings spread. He lifted his own.

I could definitely feel Stares, I sound of my rubbers soles scrapping again the concrete was the only thing I could hear. Hawks walked us back and forth, “let’s see who’s faster.”

He threw us off the Edge of the building I panicked and started flapping, after the third flap I caught wind and balanced myself. There I was flying above Hawks, he looked up at me. Hs was on his back his wings holding him in the air.

“Alright then.” I said and straightened out, “I could beat you anyday.

I move higher to bring myself to the edge of the building.

“Name a spot, and I can be there and back before you can.” I looked down at him.

“Great! I was hoping you’d agree I set it up today.” He came to my side, I heard Endeavor sigh.

“In the park by the koi pond, I stabbed a feather into a the ground,” he said plucking a long feather out of his wing.

I cringed and imagined the feeling, it’s all to painful.

“First one back with it wins.” He said and got ready, I squatted oh the edge and got ready.

“Toko! Give us a count off.” He screamed over his shoulder.

Another sigh from the party behind us, I smiled.

“Three,” a paused, “Two,” another, “One.”

We took off, I didn’t see Hawks ahead of and I wasn’t making the mistake of looking back. I pushed harder and gained more speed. I was focused on a short route I normally took until I felt something grab my wing.

I looked over to see Hawks, he was grinning and knocked into me, I knocked back into him and he only smiled wider.

“Oh, so you wanna play dirty.” I laughed.

I went up into a cloud and tried to time it, I saw Hawks in break, he looked around I dropped down on him and pushed his wing down he flipped onto his back and kept flying.

“Nice try but I’m all to use to it.” I scoffed.

“Sure.” I rolled my eyes and grabbed his boot to flip him around to face the other direction.

He did exactly that, flew in the other direction. He came back and landed on my back, his back to my back he just layer there.

“I don’t see why they don’t make this a way to travel it’s comfortable.

I did a quick roll over and he spread his own wings.

“WHAT?!” I asked as he didn’t leave my side.

“How do you get these so shiny and black?” He asked as he moved back to my side.

“If I told you I’d have to kill you.” I regretfully pulled a father of my own it hardened and caught a nice shine.

“I can do that too!” He cheered and pulled his own out. “WING BUDDIES!”

I rolled my eyes with a smield and dived down, I saw the feather and swooped in, hows swooped down. We’ll crash if one of us doesn’t pull back, or at least I’ll have to to use my whole quirk.

We pushed in before smoke filled the space I grabbed the wing and pulled back, I heard coughing and looked back to see a panicked Hawks. He didn’t notice me.

“(L/n)?” He looked around panicked.

“I let out a bird cry.” He looked up, there I was full form.

“YOU CHEATER.” He screamed and took out after me.

I flapped harder and tried to move faster and into places he wouldn’t be able to reach.

I saw Endeavor’s flames, I was so close, until Hawks pulled up infront of me. He grinned like a mad man, I changed back and stepped on his shoulder and made the jump. Feathe rin mouth I spit to get the taste of bird off my tongue.

“You should use dog shampoo, you’ll dull the color.” I said and waved the feather around.

He sighed, “I guess you win this round.”

We sat a whole longer, until the ground started to shake. There was the sound of rumbling and screams. We all rushed to the opposite side of the building. A big guy was trying to take down a building.

“Tokoyami, Go low with Endeavor, (L/n) and I will go ahead and try to save who we can from the top floors.” Hawks said taking off.

I looked back at Endeavor, “Go, it’s your job as a hero.”

I nodded and took off after Hawks. I caught up and we moved as fast as we could to get everyone out of the top floors. It was harder considering it was almost midnight and everyone one was home sleeping. I pulled out kids and men while woman tried to cling to Hawks at the chance they had. I laughed as one woman wouldn’t let him go. I heard a cry and dived in, the building was about to crumble, I can do this.

I found it, it was a little boy, he had red hair and white eyes. He was screaming for his dad. I picked him up a don looked for his dad. His dad was bleeding slightly.

“Hold onto my back and I’ll save you and your dad. Just don’t let go.” I calmly told the kid he nodded and crawled onto my back.

He held tighter then I expected. I grabbed the dad by his shoulders, “Come on.” I said and used all the arength I couldn’t o carry him at least bridal style.

With struggle I managed I ran to the holw in the wall and dived down flapping so we didn’t die from Just jumping.once on the ground I handed the guy over to Hawks and told the kid to sit with them. Hawks said ambulances were coming.

I looked back, this guy was kinda huge, what were we supposed to do? Endeavor and Tokoyami showed up. Endeavor rushed in and Hawks followed, Tokoyami knew what to do. I was still calculating and trying to figure out the best approach for myself. I found an opening, All three we’re taking him from the front, I found an opening form the back, I went for it. I flew up and spread my wings as far as they could go. At twenty four feet stretched out completely I did my best to blind him, Hawks was beside me in a flash.

“If you blind him long enough, I can get Tokoyami and Endeavor to help me.” He was gone.

I plucked out my longest, feather and used it to fight against his hands as he tried to grab at me. I stayed stretched out and tried to blind him. That was until I felt myself falling. I watched the sky swirl as I was pulled down. A sharp pain and a loud snap, my back arched. There was a loud crash, I was diving head first, the problem was, I could see where I was going, all I saw was a starry sky swirling as I started to spin while falling. The last thing I saw was Hawks Wide eyed reaching out to me and a deep scream. I was out, was I going to die?

I woke up from my dream as I started to hit water, everything was bright and white. I looked around rubbing my eyes. I tried to bring my hand up, it was held down, I looked at it and smield. I brought my left hand to my right. I brushed my fingers over the knuckles and skin that held my own.

“Endeavor.” I whispered.

I tried to sit up feeling pain in my back.

I brought my left hand to his jaw and held it, his eyes opened, he looked at me through his lashes.

“How are you?” I asked him even though it should’ve been the opposite.

“Are you alright?” He took his right hand to grab my right hand.

His left hand rested on my back, he rubbed it up slowly to help me sit up. His warm hand eased the pain that filled my muscles.

“Y-yeah, what happened?” I asked.

He sighed and tried to pull away.

I stretched with regret and grabbed his arm with my free hand.

“Please don’t,” I was basically begging for his heat.

He placed his hand back against my tender flesh.

“The criminal grabbed you by your wings when he started to fell back. I rushed in to catch you, and Hawks tried his best to grab you but his grip on yours wings was strong. He ripped out the feathers and fractured them.” He looked down.

I smiled at him, “Don’t worry about it, they’ll be fine by tomorrow morning...”

He looked up at me, he was soft, his eyes were glossed over. Tears filled the corners of his eyes. I moved my hand form his arm to hold his right cheek and get him to face me, his eyes held regret.

“You were my intern, I was supposed to protect you. I let you get hurt.” His voice was low.

“I’m your intern, I’m supposed to learn what it’s like to be a hero, and that’s exactly what happened. So you don’t have to worry. I’m happy that if I was going to experience this, that at least it was with you.” I smield at him, and looked down.

“I-” I cut him off with a look.

“Don’t worry about it.” I stopped him.

“I can make this up to you.” Her stated.

“You wanna make it up to me?” I asked and tilted my head with a slight smile.

“Yes, what’s something you’ve wanted?” He asked and fumbled around his costume and pulled out a wallet.

“Something? I’ve always wanted?” I asked and thought about it while staring at my hand with his.

“Well.” I looked up at him again with a grin.

“There’s this.” I pulled my hand free form his and grabbed his other cheek and pulled him closer.

His lips were soft, heat radiated form his face, quite literally because of his body temperature. His large hand landed on my cheek. He moved his hand so his forefinger and thumb took my chin and angled my head upwards. He kissed back eyes closed, I closed my own and brought my right hand down to his nape and ran it back up to feel the hairs at the base of his head. His hand still hot and comforting my back, I smield agsint his lips and pulled away.

“Okay, so I wanna go to Univeral with you and Shoto.” I smiled and he only looked down at me.

His eyes were so soft, they were clear, the bright color still outshine the bright white colors of the hospital I’m guessing I’m in.

“I don’t see why not.” He sighed and moved closer.

Kissing him a little longer the door opened and we pulled back, it was Shoto.

“SHOTO!” Enji screamed and pulled away.

His beard and mustache bursted into flames as he backed away and reached out for his son.

“Stop it dad, I already know what happening.” He sighed and looked down.

Enji sulked slightly and moved away from the bed side. I sat up straighter and smield at Shoto.

“So?” He asked.

“What?” I asked playing it off.

“Did your wings get better?” He crossed his arms over his chest the same way his dad does.

I forced them out and open, they were new and glossy.

“Of course they did!” They ruffled slightly, “I’m not an (l/n) for nothing!”

“Also, were going to universal!” I cheered and they spread out a bit.

“What for?” He asked.

“To Celebrate me becoming your step mom.” I winked at him, his eyes widened as his cheeks reddened.

“What?” He asked in disbelief.

“Why don’t you ask your daddy?” I joked.

He whipped around, Endeavor just looked at him.

“Told you.” I whispered to Shoto and smiled at Enji who was very slightly, smiling.

“HEY GUYS SORRY IM LATE!” And just like that, Hawks ruined the moment.

✨✨✨✨✨✨

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[shipersanonymous]

One Hit West

By: ShipersAnonymous

Chapters: 1/?

Rating: Explicit

Synopsis:

Danger at every turn, a darkness threatening to consume her, a secret she's trying to keep, a life she's trying to protect.

Iris West is the best at what she does. She knows her way around the shadows and is unstoppable with a gun. But when her old flame, Barry Allen, suddenly makes his way into her family's hit list she's forced to go against her nature to save the man she once loved. The man she still loves.

When you kill for a living, death is bound to follow where you go but how do you fight against the one thing you've been trained to do?

How do you keep yourself from being tempted by the past?

How do you protect the ones you love when the greatest danger in their lives is you?

Author's Note:

OK I'm so sorry this is so late (my time atleast) but this took a little figuring out 😅.

IT'S FINALLY HERE! My first tumblr fan fic! I'm beyond excited! Hope you all like it! Feel free to let me know what you think and share your theories!

XOXO

************ Cliffhanger Warning *************

Chapter 1

[Iris]

Bang!

The loud and familiar sound of the gun going off echoes through the abandoned warehouse and the, now, dead man’s blood splatters onto her black leather coat. She stares down at him unmoved, her face set in an expression of cold indifference. A heavy silence ensues as she simply looks into her victims cold blue eyes, a piece of her own dwindling humanity slipping out of her with every passing second. The lifeless orbs stare back at her, frozen with that special brand of fear that she’s seen on many a hit. The fear that consumes each soul at the very last second, just before she pulls her trigger. The realisation that those are the last breaths they’ll ever take, that hers are the last eyes they’ll ever see.

Satisfied that her job has been done, Iris lifts her booted foot from the corpse’s neck. The lifeless head bobs to the side and blood trickles from the bullet wound in the center like a spot of dark red paint on a fleshy canvas. She replaces her gun in its holster as she walks away from the cooling body.

“Seriously?” Eddie asks as she steps outside the abandoned building into the brisk night air. She turns her head towards him and disdainfully regards his cool stance. With his back and a foot propped against the wall and his arms casually crossed over his chest he oozes a carelessness that has become a Hitfamily trademark. She doesn’t validate his remark with the expected ‘what?’, but instead stares him down and waits for the elaboration that, she has no doubt, will follow.

“You could have put a silencer on that thing.” He explains and she simply rolls her eyes and huffs out exasperated. With a turn of her heel she begins her walk back up to her car, her unwanted partner following closely behind her.

“So that’s it? You’re just gonna ignore me? You know just cause you’re the bosses daughter Iri-”

The click of the gun engaging shuts him up and before he can blink he’s staring down the barrel of her still warm weapon.

“Listen Thawne, this was a one woman hit that I could have done in my sleep and the only reason why you’re here is cause between dealing with you and dealing with my dad you’re easier to kill. That being said…”

She steps closer to him and pulls him to her by his collar. Her gun rests beneath his raised chin and she can practically smell the fright rolling off him in tiny beads of sweat.

“… If you ever try to tell me how to do my job again, I’ll make it a point to show you just how well I know what I’m doing and the last thing you’ll see on this earth is how good I am at pulling the trigger. Incase you haven’t heard, I never miss. You get the picture?”

His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows the fearful lump forming in his throat and he nods, too afraid of saying the wrong thing and ending up like the corpse that lies bleeding in the warehouse a few feet away.

“Good. And when we’re out on a hit, it’s West. Now get out of my sight before I have to call two bodies in. I don’t need the extra paper work.” She spits shoving him away as she let’s go.

“Yes, Ma’am.” He shakes out before, scrambling to his feet and making a hasty retreat. She disengages her gun and replaces it in her holster as she tries to push down her annoyance. You’d think that with a success rate as high as hers her father would stop trying to send her out with baby sitters. Alas she’s done this tango long enough to know that there’s no use fighting with Father West. All she can hope for is a co-hitman that doesn’t actually have a thirst for blood and let’s her do her own thing. A wind blows through her tensed body, swaying her coat and ponytail synchronically in the air. A dog barks in the distance, the only sign of life in the dark and deserted place. Iris takes a moment to breathe as she feels the adrenaline begin to leave her body.

It’s time to go.

She walks the rest of the steep way up to her black car, stopping briefly to relieve herself of her stained coat and dispensing it in the trunk before stepping into the drivers seat.

With a push of the start button, the machine roars to life. Iris buckles up and takes off, speeding away in the direction of the city. One hand holds the steering wheel and the other’s fingers dance over the keypad from the monitor in the dashboard with a ritualistic ease. She calls the main office and waits for the prerecorded prompt. Instead of a robotic voice, a chime cries through the speakers, announcing that she has an incoming call.

She glances at the screen for a moment, the number is unlisted. Suspiciously she reaches up to her Bluetooth ear piece and answers.

“Hello?”

“Iris it’s me,” her brothers voice responds on the other end and an annoyance creases her brow.

“Wallace what the hell?” she demands, her eyes never leaving the road, her voice never faltering despite the nervous hammering of her heart.

“Listen you can scold me later but there’s no time for that now. You need to get to the Golden Gate Casino pronto,” the urgency in his voice is unmistakable and Iris feels herself begin to worry.

“Why?”

“Dad got a request for a hit an hour ago and you need to stop him,” he whispers.

“Wait dad’s actually going on a hit himself. Boy must be some important client,” she observes, still confused as to why her brother would send her on a literal suicide mission.

“It’s not the client that’s important, it’s the target. He has a, uh, personal score to even out.”

“Now I know you’re joking. That’s against our oath, and dad would never do that. No matter how much a person pisse-”

“It’s Barry.” Wally blurts out and the shock is enough to make her skied to a stop.

“What?” she asks feeling her lungs begin to collapse.

“The target is Barry Allen.” He clarifies.

Her skin irrupts in goosebumps at the mention of his name. It’s been so long since she last heard it said out loud, six years to be exact. A thin layer of tears gloss over her wide eyes and the sound of angered hoots is drowned out by the roar of her heart beat as memories flood her mind.

“Why Iris? Just, just tell me why? Did I do something wrong?” he begged, his voice tremulous from the effort of holding in his sobs.

“No Barry, you were perfect in every way it’s just-”

“Then why are you doing this? Don’t…” he paused, trying to find the stomach to ask what he was about to ask.

“Don’t you love me anymore?” the question came out as a whisper but Barry couldn’t bare to wait for the answer. Instead, he pulled her into his arms and she allowed herself a moment of weakness, savoring the warmth of his arms one last time.

“Don’t do this to us. Don’t- don’t do this to me.” He pleaded. She pulled away enough to look up into his saddened gaze, trying her best to hold back her own tears.

She couldn’t cry. She didn’t deserve to cry. Not with all the heartache she was no doubt causing him.

“I can’t lose you,” he begged tightening his hold on her as if he could just trap her there and keep her in his embrace forever.

“It’s for the best Barry. You, have to let me go.” She said softly though it mostly seemed like she was trying to convince herself of that.

“Iris,” he whispered her name like a cry of agony, the longing hanging from each syllable. Hurt punctuating every letter. Without thinking she kissed him, long and hard, expressing in that moment her own pain. Her own love. Her goodbye.

They broke apart and she connected her forehead to his. She kept her eyes closed but she could feel his tears dripping onto her hand like rain on a pavement.

“I love you Barry. And… a part of me knows that I always will. But I can’t be with you any longer. This- this is goodbye.” She whispered and before she gave in to her wailing heart she pushed out of his embrace and ran. She ran and never looked back. Not when he screamed out her name like he was being torn apart limb for limb the further away she got from him. Not when his footsteps no longer echoed behind her. Not when she got home and finally let herself cry. Not ever. She would never stop running. She couldn’t ever stop.

“Iris!” her brother cuts through her thoughts and she comes to, her cheeks wet with tears she thought she’d never shed again. She dabs away at them quickly and closes her eyes, shifting her mindset back to the present.

“How close is he?” Her voice was firm like a concrete wall.

“I’m not sure I had to sneak out of the office to give you the heads up but judging by the time dad left he should be there in the next 45 minutes.” He informs. Mechanically, Iris starts up the car, both her hands gripping the wheel with such force that her knuckles pale.

“I’m closer, I can make it in twenty. Get rid of your burner and be careful when you sneak back in.” She warns her foot flattening against the gass as she passes her third red light.

“I’ll be fine don’t worry. Keep me posted.” He responds.

“Wally wait!” She calls out before he hangs up.

“What is it?” he asks.

“Could you call Nissa for me? Let her know what happened and check that everything’s OK? If you can’t reach her try Jen. She usually sleeps over on weekends,” Iris asks.

“Sure thing sis. Consider it done.” He says sternly and Iris breathes a momentary sigh of relief.

“Thanks Wally,” She says softly, shedding her murderous demeanour for just a second.

“Anytime. Oh and sis?”

“Yeah?”

“Be careful.”

“Always.”

**********************************************

Iris comes to a violent stop in one of the parking slots towards the outskirts of the parking lot where no one ever parks. A brief glance at her watch tells her she has 25 minutes to get in, find him and get him out. With no time to lose she grabs her duffle bag from the trunk and squeezes into her back seat for a quick change of outfits. This will go a lot smoother if she can draw as little attention to herself as possible. Thanking her organised nature for keeping a classy yet flexible short jumpsuit in her car she slips on her heels, touches up her make up and walks towards the entrance with 15 minutes to spare. Her high ponytail sways with her hips as she clicks her way up the stairs, her senses on high alert.

To get to the gaming lounge she needs to pass through the metal detectors but the Golden Gate has been the setting for many a rendezvous with targets and clients so she barely breaks a sweat as she reaches the front of the line. Calmly, she removes the red emerald ring that rests on her ring finger, a symbol of who she is, and places it on a tray along with her clutch and her earrings. Upon seeing the ring the security guard nods his head in understanding and discreetly brushes his pass over the scanner embedded into the metal detector. It flashes green and she walks in with out a single beep. She nods back in appreciation and retrieves her belongings before stepping into a broad, red-carpeted hallway. Her pistol safely hidden in her clutch.

A clock on the wall tells her she lost five minutes in the line so she picks up her pace. As she nears the top of the stairs that will lead her down to the gambling area she forces all thoughts away from her mind and tries to prepare herself to see him again.

The only man she’s ever loved. The worst heartbreak she’s ever caused.

At the top of the stairway she scans the room, looking from any remote sign of familiarity and there, in the corner, seated at one of the roulette tables, she finds him.

For a second her heart stops and she forgets how to breathe. His back is to her but just the sight of his glistening brown-black hair, strands that once upon a lifetime she used to contently comb her fingers through, was enough to spike her nerve levels. Memories try to push their way back into her mind but she forces them down, fully aware that time is not on their side.

My side.

She scolds herself.

There is no “us”.

Taking a deep breath to compose herself she hurries down the stairs, without drawing any attention to herself, and worms her way to him. Just before she reaches him she takes a second to straighten out her outfit and plasters on her most seductive expression.

“Mind if I join you Mr. Allen?” She whispers into his ear and the chip that he had been nervously fiddling with slips from his finger, clattering on to the table.

[gg-astrology]

Update Pt. II: Self-Realization and What I’m Going to do with my Old Posts

i.e. You ever experience having Big Fear of saying something on a subject, but being scared someone/something is going to Crash Down on you with a c/o about how Wrong you are? Here’s how I’m dealing with emotions and expectations and Big Fear of Consequences (incase it helps, but its just my personal experience + thoughts) 💕❤️💗

🚫long post🚫

*this is still just an update on what’s been happening in my life?? So this is literally just what I’ve thought about, processing and dealing with. It’s not really meant to be like - here’s a full-out well-explained educational post with an ending conclusion on the subject. I’m literally just recounting events of what happened and how I feel like I’d do to a friend irl - so I hope you guys can take it as such as well! 

It’s not a big deal but I think it’s good to process, share and talk about overcoming my own personal issues with you guys!! 💕❤️💗

So:

There’s one day where I woke up (when I was still without my laptop) and saw someone comment on my old post. I have tumblr linked to my email for certain notifications - just so I can screen and know what to expect when I come into my inbox/replies.

Basically, it was an old post that I wrote trying to help anon but I was factually incorrect (to the point where I cringed at the first sentence and then shamed myself to bed 5 hours later) This made me realize my Top 10 Nightmare of Tumblr Paranoia had came true (at long last).

It’s probably bad to expect it to happen? But it  happens y know. And I’m actually glad they commented because phew I want to actually make this blog a place where I can actually help people and talk about things more objectively. So heres the thing:

I’m going to go back and clarify parts of it. I’ll mostly keep most of the content intact because I think I had good intentions, I was just Lacking A lot of Fundamental Theory and Boy That’s Not A Good Thing For An Astro Blog NOT To Have.

I want to keep it as a process and archive of how far I’ve come and how much I’ve grown/learnt. I’m? decidedly not that proud of my earlier works - and there’s things I’m still concerned about that I want to go back and address/re-edit so it could be better. But I think it’s low-key kind of fun to see who you are in the past and how present me would view past me now?

It’s like a scrapbook of my astrology journey as well - like yeah I was wrong on things, but seeing me do more research and making actual pieces of work to complement my studies is like a portfolio of what I’ve done, how far I’ve come, how my objectives have changed (if they have/haven’t) what I could stand before but couldn’t stand now, or maybe some inspiration/insights that I lack now that I might’ve had before. Idk? I just think it’s a cool neat thing to not delete or erase, or Big Fear people will come see because it’s. It’s just there and it’s me.

BUT I do think? I should make it Good for everyone who still have access to the past works. It’s basically in my masterlist so it’s available to literally everyone who decides to check. And it’s NOT good if people get the wrong info because I lacked the knowledge and wrote it in a post, and still made the post accessible to everyone. That’s just.. irresponsible? On my part. And how I put everyone else up to it as well bc of my irresponsibility.

That’s Not Good. So I’m gonna do better to scan through past works and hash it out bit by bit, it’ll take some time but I’ll start with the one that was pointed out - and work my way to other ones as well just to check if they’re ok or not ok.

For Those Who Has The Big Fear as well: 

I mentioned at the beginning, this is just me talking about what I want to do about it. I just wanted to share that experience, how I feel (Complete and Utter Shame, that was mixed with Embarrassment and Horror at myself - took me a good 3 days to Process my Feelings and came to that conclusion) -- and just y know --  I’m sure this is not just a Me Thing where you see your past stuff and you Know you’re embarrassed to talk about it. But. It’s not a bad thing. And here’s me living through it.

I think in the future - I’ll continue to be embarrassed by my lack of knowledge because I have a lot to learn. There’s plenty of people - you, me, this new person who seems to know terms you haven’t heard of before, this other person who has very formed opinions on things based on their own knowledge - who learnt things and know things.

It’s? difficult to be on top of it all the time, or know everything if you haven’t learnt about it before. So don’t be ashamed or scared that you don’t? Know everything?

When you’re beginning to learn a subject, I don’t know about others, but me and my friend have this Big Fear of saying the wrong thing or coming off too confident in something that’s Wrong and then someone coming after you/calling you out for it  -- it was a mistake, or a lack of knowledge but you can’t be faulted for that. 

How are you supposed to know something if you didn’t know? That also can’t be shamed. Maybe because we think we have to be accountable for ourselves and our lack of knowledge-- so we don’t offend someone Big who may be more knowledgeable and personally offended by just-- a person not knowing something.

I think we fear the consequences, sometimes more so than talking about it or enjoying the subject in open-ness to each others who have similar interests (there’s also an issue with inadequacy and comparison, but we’ll talk about that later see topic headers below). 

I think the idea that we could get Wrecked and Hurt, Completely Mauled Over by something or someone’s influence/ideas that is Larger than us - intimidates us at a moderately core-level into Not Addressing It (i.e. Not Taking Action/Talking). Because the repercussion seems to be... wild, and Maybe We’ll be a ScrapeGoat of an Unfortunate Event and Thats Not Cool At All Yikes. 

Addressing All The Fears (a Bundle Around This Big Fear Context) 

I’ve talked about it before, like way back earlier in the days. But I’ve always had a Big Fear of this. That’s part of why I get so intimidated when someone I like/look up to follow me?

There’s always the tiny nagging suspicion and doubt underneath my anxiety regarding this topic - like I’m unsure whether they’re going to see how I talk, what I say, what I’m providing for others and cast judgement that it isn’t good enough - like maybe I’m wrong about something and I’ll have to live with it (unreasonable but still, a Fear) and they can See that and Know i’m wrong. That’s a big Shame and Embarrassed feeling for me (i.e. making a fool of myself, which is?? essentially what this is on)

I think throughout my time here... I’ve begun to slowly mend my ideas about that fear. Part of it is because I’ve learnt more, I’m more active in using my skill-sets.

It’s because I have this blog - that I decided I’m going to start it, and it’ll keep me active in learning that I got to build up my skill-set and kept myself in-check from there. I got to interact with different topics and themes, double-check my own understanding of topics/subjects, sure I don’t know anything and everything. All of this is just what I’ve learnt, and me actively learning as I go - and while it was -- Big Fear and Unstable Ground for a while, eventually I learnt to rely more on -- the support system and people who do appreciate you, like you, what they talk about with you. 

You learn to appreciate the systems around you - the ones who interact and likes or ask and talk about stuff. The Fear and Responsibilities gets less and less fearful, because I’ve built trust in others - and it’s a reality check: that not all that’s in my head is good for me. Not even myself and my own thought is as good to me as the reality you live/have around you sometimes. And thats -- a fortunate thing, that’s something to not be taken for granted, and something I have to be thankful for. It directly addresses possible issues I didn’t know I had -- about how much this was weighing on me, by relieving me from it bit by bit as well. 

And that’s what I should note on, because even just a solitary ‘like’ on a social media site-- when you’re scared or unsure of whether you’ve made a right call -- is enough of a support for you to rest a little easier, knowing someone else got what you intended and support you morally as well. 

Standards and Logic: Ideals

I still get Big Fear because of my own ideals - like sometimes I have a mean voice? That just goes ‘you’re an astrology blog - your core/most basic requirement is to KNOW basic facts about astrology’ and then it goes ‘you NOT knowing something about the subject -- something basic, and STILL getting it wrong is absolutely irredeemable’ 

You know what’s the worst part about the mean voice? It’s because it’s my brain, it’s how I reason and logic. This is how I hold my own standards and ideals, and no matter how kind I am to others, my own core self isn’t kind to myself. Fundamentally --- since I couldn’t resolve it, I believe it’s my standard and is underlying in how I treat others too (even if I actively work to Not Let That Happen or Be True, it’s still a part of me).

I don’t want to treat others like that. That’s the scariest part. Part of the reason why it’s so hard - is because we see reason why our mean voice makes sense. To me, that’s objectively the ideal and standard. I already gave it my consent and agreement by understanding it’s logic - and now I fear it.

A part of me just going through this - is confronting this standard issue and my ideals. I think -- all of us who have Big Fear in some ways, understands the logic in just being Good at what you start out to do. Fundamentally, objectively. It kinda makes sense that if you’re going to write about biochem - you should get it right so you don’t fuck up about it. 

But I think you all can tell now - reading it in third person - how you’re allowed to make mistakes? If you’re willing to say that to someone else and understand that-- even if you write about biochem, but you might’ve missed a few marks because you got the answer wrong--- it doesn’t mean you’ve completely jeopardize the subject itself and everyone who’s a master at it. You’ve just made a mistake. And everyone - realistically - realizes how little it matters when you admit or realize you’ve made a whoopsie.

Making Mistakes - Accepting Being Wrong To Not Become an Asshole

A mistake is a mistake, it’s a human error. People fuck up sometimes, but -- we learn from our mistakes. 

It’s just a matter of accepting it in the first place? Being able to accept the mistake is what differentiate being an asshole to actually not letting it hinder you and moving on. 

I think -- just in my case -- I can see why it’s easy to cling on. If you only have your skill-sets to hold onto to, it’s hard to accept any other form of opinions or ideas that challenges it. I think that’s -- ego -- but also defense/offensive action. 

Not -- ‘im offended’ but more like, a tactical offense. I’ve seen people who manipulate others because they only have their skill-sets. Making the audience sway in their narrative and perspectives because they say it’s the ‘truth’ and that they’re knowledgeable or have experiences. I don’t necessarily agree with what they do, but that’s -- not on me, and I don’t care because that’s not something I?? feel comfortable addressing. 

I offered this brief example - because it’s the opposite of ‘well I don’t feel adequate about my knowledge, maybe I shouldn’t say something because I don’t have anything to offer?’ - here’s an example of someone who has knowledge, and is saying something. But is perhaps doing it in a way that isn’t... ideal as well. 

So if you think about the alternative: Which would you rather be? 

We just gotta know how to deal with it and address all the different elements to it as we can (what we’ve touched on earlier: own voice, judgement from others, concrete-starting something and self-expectations, fearful of expectations, not accepting being wrong or making mistakes as an OK thing to do, and how to deal with it kinda)

  Future Embarrassment (Continuous habit of being Embarrassed and Feeling Inadequate About your Skill-sets/Knowledge)

I’ve always thought about this - like how do I stop myself from being embarrassed and ashamed when I can’t fault myself for not knowing before - the only solution I can find for myself is just to do good.

Not suddenly go research and be on top of it with information + overloading myself like That kind of Good-good (‘im good at what I do’ -- not that type of good, confidence in skills doesn’t cover up insecurities and fear, but you can be confident in other areas you can shine light on better about yourself!) 

Do good to me is to chew what I can, say when I can’t, have good intentions and offer the things you CAN give. If it’s insight, clarifications, open-opinions - most people who are coming to you and asking for you are people who appreciates intentions. Just as you expect the same back.

The most consistent thing I’ve ever done is to just be in the mindset of wanting to be good and pushing myself to be good. I’m not saying I’m like -- 100% whole-heartedly a Good Person. But if I just focus on my intent, how it underlines everything, keeping things clear with that intention in mind. As long as I aspire to be good to others, there’s not much else anyone can say to harm me or my motives I think.

Maybe I’m not that good in terms of skill-sets, but more in terms of wanting to do objectively the best that I can, and wanting the best for others. That’s the two things I keep in my mind and goals; in your own heart. Regardless of everything - these two things will keep you going if you truly want and work towards it.

Comparison to others/Inadequacy 

I think that to others - maybe other people who have the same goal in mind; maybe same heart, maybe this would mean to do what they can and perhaps they are capable of achieving skill-sets, overcoming insecurities with knowledge and Not Feel Overwhelmed. 

But I know that’s not for me? Not how I work or the best I can offer - of course I attempt it too and yeah it works sometimes, but my constant and my ideas haven’t been about being right or correct whenever I post or say something (although I strive to try and do it right, as much as I can) -- it’s always been about realistically - what can I do, what can I give that’s 100% me and what’s needed/capable of doing?  

It’s hard because there’s also -- ideals about what IS the best solution. Like when presented with the same problems, same ask. You have two different people who share the same ideals and thoughts - both agreeing that the best way is to do it ‘like this’ - but one does it better and the other watches it knowing they couldn’t have executed it as flawlessly. 

And maybe you’re the other - but that, doesn’t make it any less obvious when you see it in third-person that the other person has their own gift and methods that is just as valuable as the one who did the good execution. They provide and support one another, just have to find their wings and respect, appreciate and cherish (lift up) one another’s skill-sets and capabilities as well.

It’s hard to apply it back to yourself -- that your thoughts, words and knowledge is valuable to anyone or that it’s Not lacking in some ways. What you see of yourself - there’s others who sees it in a more tender way than you do. What you can control, and what you can do best, is to not expect yourself to be unrealistic - but expect to be realistic about what you can provide, if all else fails, anyways. 

Stick to your guns - I’m basically just trying to say that. The feeling of inadequacy (that’s literally the core of it, underneath the shame) is fine -- and yeah. I don’t have? I’ve written alot but I hope this comes through well. 

I’m working through it but I hope, this helps a little. If you’ve read it at all. It’s long and rambly, but I hope this -- helps? Anyone else? Or just myself who’s working through it. But -- I hope this gives strength or support to anyone who needs it. Thanks for reading if you’ve read!!!

[megwritesfanfiction]

Wild Flowers - Jericho/Raven, Chapter 8/??

Disclaimer: I do not own Teen Titans. I am not making a profit off of this.

Missed Previous Chapters? Here ya go! ;) Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7

SORREL - Flower of Affection

The excitement of defeating Trigon had been quickly overshadowed by the reality of her new circumstances. The emotional freedom she craved came with the burden of having to process, identify, and deal with her feelings.

The option to repress and ignore was no longer available because of the excuse of Trigon was gone.

Raven couldn’t hide behind the excuse of father’s control.

So, when Jericho confessed he thought their biggest foe was his father, Raven found herself frozen in a cloud of unidentifiable emotions.

“It’s all most two o’clock in the morning.”

She released a heavy exhale at the sound of Robin’s voice behind her. Raven hadn’t realized she’d been outside with her thoughts for that long. “Okay.” She decided she wasn’t going to move until her thoughts and feelings were clearer; and after three hours sitting outside, she wasn’t any closer.

“Would you…” Robin started carefully as he approached her. “Like to talk about it?” He offered taking a seat next to her.

Violet eyes squinted as she worked hard to distance her emotions from him. “I don’t think I should.”

“Okay…”

“It’s not bad.” It was possibility catastrophic, bad an understatement. She looked away from him and focused her attention to the dark water.

Robin hung his head, shaking it with a knowing smirk. “You’re a horrible liar.”

“You’re cheating.”

“Actually,” he told her, leaning back on his palms. “I’d know without the bond. You looked away from me when you responded.”

Bastard.

“And your nose twitched.”

It did not. Raven tightened her jaw incase her face decided to betray her once more.

“Just did it again.”

“You’re annoying.”

Robin shrugged, unrepented. “But, I’m not wrong.”

Unfortunately, he wasn’t.

“Are you going to tell me?” He questioned.

“I think,” Raven had to make sure she worded this carefully. “I think I might have some information on Slade.” Her statement was false. The conversation she had with Jericho shed some new light about their enemy.

“How?!”

“I don’t know.” Lie. “I,” It wasn’t right to lie to Robin, but it was also unfair to betray Jericho’s confidence. “I got this weird sense of deja vu after the fight today that I can’t shake.”

“Like what? What did you remember?” Robin pushed.

Raven shrugged, uncomfortable with the lies she weaved. “It’s not a memory. I just feel like we don’t know the whole story. I think we’re missing some important facts.”

“Obviously,” he huffed, disappointed with her information. “We should have had him by now.”

“No,” Raven shook her head standing. She dusted off her leggings. “Why do you keep blaming Slade?”

“Well, he’s-“

“He’s not the root of all evil.” Raven stopped that rant before it even began. “From the information we already have on him, we know he’s a normal man-“

“A normal man transformed into some super soldier that has found a way to cause an extraordinary amount of damage.” Robin corrected feeling his anger spike.

Raven released a heavy exhale. “But why?” She questioned, waiting for Robin to give an answer.

Brows knit in confusion as he shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“Exactly.” She nodded, walking toward the tower.

Raven pressed her ear and palm against the thick metal door as her eyes drifted closed in concentration. The gentle push of her empathy reached to the other side of the door as she tried to sense Jericho on the side. She normally didn’t use her empathy do locate her teammates and determine if they were asleep, but she needed to talk to the mute.

To do that, she needed to know if he was awake.

The door opened with a whoosh causing Raven to step back in surprise. Jericho stood in front of her, dressed only in dark red flannel pajama bottoms and curls frenzied. He tipped his head, signaling he to step inside.

How did you know I was out there? Raven wondered as she entered his room.

He gave her a small smirk as he sat on the bed. When you spend your life in silence, it’s amazing how much you hear. Jericho shrugged.

She nodded, timidly taking a seat next to him. Raven pulled her legs up sitting criss cross. “We need to talk.” She spoke softly, lips twisting.

We do. Jericho nodded seriously. I don’t want you to think I’m going to betray you guys.

We don’t think that.

He raised a skeptical as he stared at the empath. I think Robin is going to disagree.

We’re not telling Robin.

You’re right. Jericho nodded. I’m telling him tomorrow. I don’t have anything to hide about my past. Do I have regrets? Of course. He sighed, running a tired hand through his hair. But, I don’t feel any guilt. If anything, I’d just want to talk to him…

“Do you think,” She started carefully. You could face him? I mean, if it came down to it-

If he was threatening innocent lives, I wouldn’t have a choice. Jericho told her sadly. I couldn’t do anything about the circumstances of my childhood, but I’m older now. And, I won’t let his actions destroy another family.

Raven gave him a little nod, looking at him seriously. You know my father is a demon, right?

Jericho’s eyes widened. He knew her father was evil, but…

“Literally,” Raven clarified with a small smile. I’m half demon. My mother is human.

The mute wasn’t sure what to say, and it was times like this he was thankful for his silence.

I understand what it’s like for people to assume your worth because of your father. She told him, taking his face in her hands their eyes connecting. “You’re nothing like him.”

Jericho gently pressed his lips against the empath’s, curling his fingers in her hair. Okay.

Her eyes were heavy lidded and confused as they parted. Okay?

He released a silent a silent laugh, pulling wrapping his arms around her as he pulled he underneath his deep violet sheets. Placing a kiss to the top of her head, he nestled her back against his chest. His hands innocently dipping underneath her sweatshirt to touch her skin. Okay. Jericho repeated softly.

They’d deal with the future tomorrow.

[spirify]

「Reflection」Chapter Four

Reflection

Elsword Fanfiction | Add x Ara

Written by Spirify. 11. 18. 2017

Add watched with slight amusement as his fiancee turned around with a red face, stomping away angrily. It was almost a bit cute, but he decided he wouldn’t go there. With a content sigh, the male was ready to head back to the dining room to bid the old hag a goodbye. He didn’t want to be here any longer than necessary and a proper farewell would be more than enough to please the lady. Just as he started walking, his mind fell blank and suddenly he realized the situation he was in. Where in Elrios was he? Of course, he was in the Haan Estate, but exactly… where? Face turning pale, his eyes glanced down uneasily at the long corridors, the different twists and exits of the halls swirling his mind into a jumbled mess. Wonderful. He was lost. And his only guide out was through his fiance, the fiancee that he had just so happened to tell off about one minute ago. The day couldn’t honestly go any worser now could it? Whirling around just in time to watch her silhouette turn down the hall, Add called out desperately.

“Hey! Wait up!” He quickly chased after her, realizing soon enough that she had no intent to slow down for him, “I said wait!”

“Why are you following me?! Didn’t you just say we wouldn’t meet again outside the boundaries of a social or formal party?” Ara snapped, clenching her fist as she took a sharp turn with the intent to shake him off.

“Agh, I know! But, just, wait up! I need to ask you something!” Add cried miserably, running an irritated hand through his hair as he continued his pursuit after her.

“Sorry, but I’m not taking any questions right now! If you need something, why don’t you go to my Mother!” The maiden replied back firmly, her heels at this point smashing into the ground with annoyance.

“Ugh, stop being such a spoiled princess! Are you really that upset? I’m quite certain you told me that you weren’t interested in this marriage either?” Add shouted, beginning to easily catch up to the female.

“I’m not upset! So just leave me alon- ahh!” Just as she began to retort back, her quick walking pace had sowed the seeds of chaos for her. With her heels accidentally catching onto the hem of her dress, Ara felt herself trip forward, letting out a fearful gasp as she clenched her eyes close, preparing for the hard impact of the ground.

However, the impact never came. Instead, she felt herself fall onto something warm and soft, the sound of a muffled groan echoing into her ear. Just as quickly as she had snapped her eyes closed, they flew open once more to reveal Add beneath her.

“Add?!”

The gentlemen used his arms to push his upper body off the ground, Ara still clinging to his shirt as he let out a sigh. Opening one eye to lazily gaze up at her, Add opened his mouth.

“Could you get off of me now? It’s not very comfortable to be held down.”

“O-oh! S-sorry!” The female stammered, hastily getting off of him to kneel down at his side. Concerned, her eyes flickered up and down to search for any injuries that may have fell upon him during his catch.

“I’m fine, but you need to be a bit more careful. What kind of lady trips over her own dress?” The male noticing her distress, quickly addressed her worries before standing up to dust off his suit.

“I-uh, um, I’m sorry,” Ara replied, frowning as she took in his disheveled appearance. Out of instinct, she stood up and reached for his tie, carefully tightening it and placing it back in the middle. Without missing a beat, she went next towards his hair, using her fingers to brush it back and smooth down the strands that were sticking out. Once she was satisfied with his look, she took a step back, nodding in approval. As her eyes moved up his body searching for anymore errors, they soon enough fell upon his amused glance.

“...What..?” She questioned slowly.

“Hm? It’s nothing. I was just a little surprised that you could actually display the qualities of a wife,” Add smirked, raising an interested eyebrow.

“Huh? What’s that suppose to mean?!”

“Exactly what it’s suppose to mean.”

“Are you trying to say that I don’t resemble a wife at all?!”

“Considering your clumsiness, I might be.”

“I’m not always clumsy! It was just that one time!”

“Are you sure? I believe just this morning you couldn’t even walk without me pulling you along, no?”

“That was because you took me by surprise!”

“Oh? Was I so dashingly handsome that you froze in awe of my looks?” At that joke, Ara lightly punched him on the chest, letting out a pout as she crossed her arms.

“Agh, whatever! Anyway, what did you want to ask me?”

“Oh, that’s right. Show me the way out,” The bluntness in his voice caught her off guard.

“The way out?”

“Guess you didn’t hear me the first time. Yes, the way out,” Add nodded, gesturing down the halls.

Ara’s eyes trailed down the direction of his hands, taking in the long white halls with golden out-linings. It seemed as if the corridor went on forever, with infinite amounts of turns and twists at every nook and cranny. She had realized that during her earlier anger, she had strided away from Add without a thought about the direction to her room, just merely assuming that by walking she would arrive. That was obviously not going to happen. With a nervous laugh, she bit her lip lightly, turning to face his awaiting face.

“I’m not too sure of where we are either…?”

“What?!” Add cried incredulously, “What do you mean you don’t know? Don’t you live here?”

“Not really… I only come back to the main estate when Mother calls for me. To be honest, I’ve only stayed here a couple of times and then again, it’s only for a maximum of three days per visit, so…”

“So, to say, the main Haan estate is only a place for you to answer your Mother’s call and that you yourself, the daughter of the Haan family, does not actually live here?” Ara nodded quietly in response to his sarcastic question.

“C’est juste genial…” Add muttered under his breath, “The only daughter of the prestigious Haan family doesn’t even live in the main estate, this is just great.”

“Sorry…” Ara murmured softly at his displeased voice, shirking down as she lowered her gaze.

“You need to stop apologizing for everything. Your lack of knowledge of this place isn’t your fault.”

“I know, but, I feel a little guilty. You cushioned my fall and I can’t even give you the basic directions out of this godforsaken place…” Ara intertwined her fingers, letting out a defeated sigh.

“Like I said earlier, it’s not your fault. Well, in either case, we might as well wander the halls together incase Madam Haan or your butler finds us. Now listen up, don’t say a word about what’s happened here, got it? I don’t particularly enjoy spending extra time around royalty while answering rhetorical questions,” The male reached an arm outwards towards the maiden.

Ara stared back at it confusedly.

“This is to prove that we’re fiancees, remember?” Add clarified.

“Oh, right,” Gently, Ara wrapped her arm around his, using her other hand to smooth down her dress and tidy her hair.  She didn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea when looking at her and her husband together, deciding it was best to remain neat and composed. She especially didn’t want her Mother to see her in a messy appearance, for she knew the questions would come aimed at the time she had spent together with Add.

Shaking her head in slight fear of the potential problems to come, she let Add lead the way through the hall, praying that Chung would be the one to come find them first.

Flashing lights, booming music, and the chattering crowd filled the air as Ara sat cooly on the edge of the stage, her face resting against her propped up leg. Dressed in her usual break-dancing outfit, black sweatpants and an orange crop top, she watched dazedly at the people dancing in-front of her. This night, there was no competition between her and E.N.D. Infact, E.N.D wasn’t even here. Perhaps, it was because there was no event this time around. In either case, Ara felt a little sad that he wasn’t here, wanting to share her horrifying prior experience from this morning.

Right after she and her fiance confirmed that they both had no idea where they were, the two had decided to team up to find the way back to the dining hall. Wandering together, Ara had the chance to actually talk to Add one on one without the fake facade that she had put on earlier. She had pointed out his rude and sarcastic personality, questioning if he actually was the gentlemen that everyone had praised him as. He had replied back yet again sarcastically, he too pointing out that she was too clumsy and oblivious to actually be a lady. They had bickered and teased each other the whole time, sooner or later being found by (to Ara’s disappointment) Mother Haan. Add had smoothly switched back to a princely personality, claiming that he had wanted to spend some time alone with Ara to learn more about her and apologized lightly. Mother Haan had merely beamed and stated that it was quite fine, later on escorting him out to bid a farewell.

“A.C.E~? What’s wrong, baby?” At the sound of a sultry voice, Ara snapped out of her thoughts, her eyes trailing towards a slender woman with silky blonde hair.

The woman had emerald eyes that sparkled vibrantly, dressed in a tight green top and loose white pants that showed off her busting chest and curvy figure.

“Rena,” Ara murmured softly.

“Wow~ That was quite the excited response~” Rena replied back cheerfully, smiling as she leapt up to seat herself beside the maiden.

Rena was the hoster of the enormous break-dancing club that sat behind the alleyways of France. She and her husband Raven, had found it and brought the culture of the dance alive, driving all sorts of people to come join and dance the night away. Rena was also the one who realized Ara’s potential to break-dance during the female’s ballet performance, excitedly asking if she wanted to try it out. Cue to now, Ara was the most popular female break-dancer, however her identity remains a mystery. Her name A.C.E was given by the other members of the club. Ara was grateful to Rena and Raven, since they were the one to honor her decision of remaining anonymous. They even went as far as to provide guards and a locked room all for the sake of protecting her.

“What's bothering you? You’re not even dancing today,” Rena said sweetly, brushing a hand through her hair and flipping it behind her.

“Hm? Oh, it’s nothing. Just dealing with some, y’know, family problems…” It wasn’t the full truth, but it wasn’t a full lie either.

“Ah, I see… I know it’s hard for you right now, Ara. But you can’t always look at the down-sides to a situation, there’s always something good that comes from it! Everything happens for a reason, and even though that reason might be complete bullshit, just know that life comes with its ups and downs.”

“Mm.”

“You know… It’s been awhile since we danced together, why don’t we usher down there and do a little performance, hm?” Rena cooed, gesturing down at the opened space within the crowd.

Laughing lightly at her remark, Ara hopped on down, brushing her hair towards the back. Today wasn’t the best day, but neither was it the worst. Her husband turned out to be a complete jerk, a jerk that she enjoyed talking to. She was also relieved at the fact that he wasn’t interested in her sexually, and that their relationship would only be political. Free from the binding chains that her mother had placed on her, Ara felt alive once more, a more vibrant flame now burning in her chest as she stepped towards the now-waiting crowd, ready to let A.C.E take over for the night.

[motorcyclegirlfriends]

Your mental gymnastics and pretzel-like prose in defense of anything and everything Melissa Benoist has said or done are admirable in their own way. But your insistence on telling the rest of fandom what they should think and how they should feel, and passive-aggressive - what Twitter users would call 'sub-tweeting' - of people who simply don't agree with you, is irritating, to say the least. You'd have more credibility if you admitted your fave has flaws and makes mistakes like the rest of us.

lol babe I already know Melissa has flaws. I can disagree with your criticisms of her at the same time as not thinking she’s some kind of god. Hell, half of the issues I deal with come about because other people had put her and do put other celebrities on a pedestal. (Katie Mcgrath, anyone?)

I’ve made concessions about her mistakes in the past, just with the emphasis that I judge her with the same fervor I would a normal person, no more. My standpoint has always been that celebrities are just people.

And my opinions are not mental gymnastics, they’re my initial impressions afterward broken down. Do not mistake the depth at which I clarify my ideas with the difficulty I had in coming to them. 

When people were initially calling the cast homophobic, I felt like it was an incredible reach. But that was, in fact, the initial feeling that people had about it.

Now, what I’m doing is unpacking why we had different reactions and explaining why I believe mine was more truthful to what occurred, with the same effort I put forth in metas and other written analyzations. 

(At this point, I’m known for going more in depth than strictly necessary. It’s my thing. This response is probably definitely an example. But that doesn’t mean it was difficult to get there. Usually, the problem is that it’s too easy to think of more things.)

And of course I’m going to tell the rest of the fandom what they should think??? Where do people get this idea that openly arguing with an idea is somehow a bad thing? 

Like “You’re trying to change the way I think!” Yeah???

This isn’t me writing “Lena Luthor is a top” on someone’s personal fic depicting her as a bottom and trying to ruin their fun, this is me saying “Lena Luthor is a top and here’s why” in an original post, in response to an outpouring of people saying, “Lena Luthor is a bottom and that’s that.”

(Tbh I headcanon most people as switches, if you were wondering.)

And forget the fact that I just think you’re wrong and should be able to argue against you, it’s something that actively affects my fan-experience, as a fan of Melissa?? As a fan of Kara, who has been getting hate now, too???

And in the same way that it’s not good form to directly @ people who think Lena is a top to argue with them, I prefer to attack the idea that Melissa is homophobic and the methods of many in this fandom. 

Because it’s not just one or two people who believe differently than I, incase you haven’t noticed. It’s a movement.

And I also don’t want to alienate people, because I think they can change. I don’t like to single out people and say “these ones are bad” because it stifles the opportunity for growth. I’d rather say “these things are bad” and see people move away from those things.

It may come off as “passive-aggressive” to you or to others, but I can’t help that. It still feels like the right move, to me. 

And if people were still writing arguments and putting them in the tag on this subject, I’d directly speak to them, because it’s obvious that they’d expect a conversation. In the same way I expected people to come to me after I tagged my recent post, and you came to me. (Aren’t you now telling me how I should behave in the same way I have been telling others how they should?)

But there’s no “we should call melissa a lesbophobe in all our tags” in the supergirl tag for me to directly respond to. So I’m stuck arguing with a trend and trusting that others have witnessed it.

But the truth is, every time someone makes a post on this website, they’re trying to affect people’s minds. Make people think a certain way. Sometimes, in a different way than they were before.

Singling out me and saying “you shouldn’t try to change people’s minds about this” is clearly only because you disagree with me.

[kbeauty-dailyblog]

Update: some advice, new makeup, hauls?

I am now my families’ go to person for skincare advice. I’m an amateur but I still have some basic knowledge and if you have any questions, I might be able to give some advice. Keep in mind that I’m not an expert, it might be wrong, and I’ll probably end up googling the answers to make it sound more scientific but I’ll only answer if I experienced it before. I don’t give out advice based on other people’s impressions. Only my own.

That’s why I would always try out a product for a really long time before recommending it to anybody. I’m currently trying out the cosrx bha blackhead liquid and aha whitehead liquid for my brother. I do know that everyone’s skin is different and what works for me might not work for you but I’ll feel bad if I recommend a method/product I’ve never tried before and ended up ruining someone’s skin bc it didn’t work for them.

Remember to patch test. Idc if some people says it doesnt work, you should do an initial test incase there’ll be an immediate reaction or wait 24-48hours after trying a new product bc some allergic reactions are delayed and might show up a couple days later. ______________________________________________________

Remember when I wrote our my peripera ink the velvet in #13 and how it’s not my color? Probably not. Anyway, #13 aka charming coral did not fit my skintone at ALL. It made me look washed out and my skin is slightly tanned. I was going to give it away to one of my cousins with lighter skin bc it’ll probably match their skintone better but then I did a big swatch on my hand and realized that it’s the perfect light blush color on me. If you’re spending money on something and end up hating it, try to find a different function of it so you don’t end up throwing it out (hard to return stuff from korea, especially for a lazy person like myself). I don’t really have a lot of blushes bc I could never find my cheekbones or know where to put it but I feel in love with the Holika Holika Gudetama Jelly blush in CR01 (so cute!! You can buy it at CVS now!!) so it made me want to try more blush products. I still need to try it a couple more times before I make a final conclusion on whether to give it away or not. It’s not because I don’t want to give things away but I feel bad giving used things to my cousins just because it didn’t work for me. Almost like giving my trash to them which feels wrong but it’s better than throwing it away and being wasteful.

________________________________________________________

Maybes?- I’m planning another Jolse Haul for my birthday month and it’s going to be slightly big. I’m not definitely sure but I want to try some etude house skincare like the soon jung toner and it’s ion water facial mist. I love hydration. I used to hate toners and thought they were useless bc the usa only sold ones with lots of alcohol in it. Look at how the tides had turn. Now I’m in love with all of my hydrating and clarifying toners.

Plus I’ll be going to tonymoly, the faceshop, and aritaum while I’m in virginia so I might try some new stuff while I’m restocking

90% sure I might buy- amazon 1. Peripera ink the velvet in #7 and #9 (#9 finally came back in stock!!) 2. Peripera milk sun cushion ( I tried the no sebum one and it was a little drying so I wanted to try this).

Haul coming soon: Too faced cosmetics stuff

[fuck-customers]

We have one regular that always comes through the drive thru in a massive rush but that somehow still has time to complain. Every. Single. Day. He'll drive to the speaker, bark his order and drive round before you've had chance to enter it let alone clarify anything you might need too. That wouldn't be so bad but he's a complete prick about it if the poor sod at payment has to then figure wtf he actually wants since he always orders at least one grill then bitches if he's asked to park up while we make his not-on-the-fucking-menu food. I was the unlucky one at the presenting window a few days ago when he came through, our exchange went like this: Me: (usual generic but cheerful greeting while handing him his food) Him: I need to complain. Me: (thinking: RIP my times) oh, I'm sorry to hear that, what seems to be the problem? Him: you got my order wrong last time and I can never call because I never have credit on my phone so I got my daughter to email. Me: oh, I'm really very sorry that your order wasn't right but if your daughter emailed us then your name should be in the book for a replacement next time you come. Him: Sorry isn't good enough and they always say my name's in the book but they never explained what that means and how am I supposed to contact you when I have no money on my phone? Me: (explains how the books our record incase we need to replace meals etc etc and once again apologises.) He sort of snorts in annoyance and drives off. One; it's not my fucking problem you're too lazy to put credit on your phone. Two; I'm pretty damn sure they've explained how we record any complaints so we can fix it for you next time you're here but but you probably got impatient and didn't listen. It's standard as hell that we explain it clearly when dealing with complaints 'cos our managers take them super seriously. Three; if saying sorry and fixing the problem isn't good enough... what do you even want!? Like help me out here mate. If we always fuck up then there's two other sets of golden arches ten minutes in either direction, you're very welcome to go there instead. I've seen this guy treat so many members of staff like shit because he's in too much of a rush to adhere to basic drive thru etiquette. It's no surprise his order might sometimes get messed up when he doesn't make sure it's entered correctly on screen in the first place then pretty much throws his money at the cashier. He's honestly only got himself to blame and he really needs to just take a damn breath, chill out then trot the fuck on.