#just because his arguments are personal doesn’t make them any less valid | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

absurdly-overpowered-astronaut · 2 months ago

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you know something that has bothered me about persona 5 ever since I played it is how they don’t address Yusuke’s attitude towards art.

He idealises the artistic process to the point its clearly self destructive (ie doesn’t eat , doesn’t have any money ect) and more concerning the idea of the true artist. The artist who is divorced from all worldly needs and pleasures the artists who has cut themselves off completely from society all in the name of their unbending artistic vision.

The best example I can think of off the top of my head is when he comes over to Ren’s house he gets them to watch art documentaries with him and if I’m remembering correctly the guy in the documentary left his family and completely cut himself off from society for the sake of his craft and yusuke considers this aspirational.

The problem is this attitude isn’t actually all that helpful. Any work done while depriving yourself is never the best work you could have made whether that be of sleep , food , social interaction , joy ect and art devoiced from society lacks meaning the best art isn’t completely removed from the human experience it reflects and comments it on it

but more so then this mindset being destructive and a tired idea I have distain for it feels like such a clear extension of Madarame’s abuse. We see Madarame also holds this mindset so Yusuke must have gotten it from him and it seems to disproportionately benefit Madarame and reminds me of abusive behaviour.

if yusuke doesn’t value and understand money or the worldly pleasures it can afford him then he won’t be bothered by Madarame receiving all the money from his works and it makes him more dependent on Madarame / the school he goes to because he can’t for example take the train , afford food or housing and it somewhat limits him socially making it harder to go out with friends.

“Social abuse is behaviour that is aimed at cutting you off from other relationships. This can be your family, friends, your workplace or a community you belong to.

The abusive person may:

-try to stop you from seeing other people or going to social activities

-try to stop you from going out

-make it difficult for you to use your car, other forms of transport or mobility aids” (in this case train)

“Types of financial and economic abuse

The abusive person may:

-take full control of all the finances, spending and decisions about money so that you are financially dependent on them”

if yusuke thinks that the only compensation a “true artist” needs is the artistic fulfilment of completing a work then he won’t be bothered by Madarame taking the credit

if yusuke thinks he needs to cut himself off from the world and others then he will be less likely to realise that what madarame is doing is wrong but also that he is completely dependent on madarame.

“Abusive partners will often try to isolate their victim, i.e. limit their access to those close to them in order to weaken them psychologically. The victim ends up cut off from the relationships that fuel their inner strength, provide validation and support, and could help them to see their situation more clearly.”

(I’m using an example from an article about abuse in romantic relationships but the point still applies)

if yusuke is single mindedly focused on the creation of art that benefits Madarame more because the more art the more compensation he receives

“An abuser may deliberately deprive the victim of sleep, with the aim of making them more vulnerable. The abuser may startle her awake just as she's about to fall asleep, refuse to let her sleep to settle an argument (often deliberately started at bedtime), or wake her up incessantly during the night” “The victim then loses a lot of stamina and finds themselves greatly weakened, both psychologically and physically.”

the idea that only other creative souls will understand your work creates a us vs them conflict and allows the abuser to easily reflect with “they just don’t understand”

It introduces this dynamic that wanting anything that doesn’t contribute to the art is bad and makes you a worse artist a worse person. Its assigning morality and success to the behaviour that madarame wants to incentivise and disincentivise he wants yusuke to make more art but he doesn’t want to yusuke to become disconnect or independent so the sentiment that to be a true artist you must let go of worldly possessions once again loops back round to reinforcing abuse

even though he is out of the abusive environment he still hasn’t unlearned/been confronted on this mind set.

#This is the most I have used ’Worldly pleasures’ in my entire life #Idk if this is coherent in anyway shape or form but here we go #I also think there is a very similar missed opportunity with Ryuji where he clearly has a very unhealthy relationship with physical violenc #Ie being the party member most likely to take a hit for others being a physical party member and offering himself up to get beat up by the #Old track team as a punishment he seems to equate being hurt physically and punishment/ being hurt physically and protecting people #Which seem like attitudes that would arise from having an abusive father / the who komashida situation and even though he has left both tho #Environments he still acts that way and like yusukes art attitude its play for jokes?!#P5 #persona 5 #yusuke kitawaga

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ciaossu-imagines · 8 months ago

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Day 3 prompt 3 nr 39 for varia squad, thw vongola tenths and if you want also the millefiore?

Of course, my dear! Thank you so much for the request and I hope you’ll enjoy my thoughts, even though I know they differ quite a bit from yours on some of the characters!

What is the most common source of arguments with the character’s life partner(s)?

Tsuna and Ryohei’s most common source of arguments with their respective partners actually run quite a bit along the same lines. Both of their partners will have issues with accepting the fact that both of these men will hide a lot from their partners. In both cases, these men believe they’re doing the right thing. In their minds, they want to shelter their partners from the harsh realities of mafia life and they don’t want to make their partners worry or hurt. But the fact of it, coming from the side of their partner, is that it will make their partner feel as if these men don’t trust them or see them as weaker and just something to be protected and set aside from the rest of their lives. It’s nearly impossible to keep a relationship alive when one party feels as if the other sees them as less than or if one party feels like the other doesn’t trust and respect them. Tsuna and Ryohei do have their points, but they’ll also need to realize that their lovers have valid points too. They’ll have to put themselves in their lovers shoes and realize how they would feel in that position and there is hope that both men are capable of getting better at communication, but it won’t be a natural or quick thing for them and finding a partner who will stick around and wait for them to improve is going to be a struggle. On top of this issue with Ryohei, I do feel like his partner will also have some issues with just how much he enjoys fighting, with how often he comes home with his body broken, cut up, badly injured.

Gokudera, Yamamoto, and Chrome’s most common fights with their respective partners all come down to the same issue – their partner never gets to feel like they’re the priority. Each of these characters are people who would put other things above their partners. Chrome really will, even as she gets her own life, her own friends, a romantic partner, all of it, put Mukuro and the Kokuyo Gang above anything else in her life. If Mukuro needs her, she is going to him, no discussions needed and nothing her partner will say will change that. She doesn’t see why her partner cannot accept this, especially as they know how precious Mukuro and the Kokuyo Gang are to her. To her, Mukuro is the only reason she had this second life, this chance to actually be with her partner, so how can they sit there and complain about the times when she has to go and help Mukuro? Do they not realize that without him, she would not be there with them in the first place? She’s not a scream and fight kind of person though and most arguments her partner has with her regarding the subject are shut down just by Chrome walking away, telling them she will be back and hoping that they will come to their senses by the time she returns.

Gokudera’s case is obvious. I will always say that, because of how long he spent with nothing and because of how Tsuna took him in, gave him family and friends and a purpose in life, that Tsuna and the Vongola family will always be his priority. If Tsuna needs him, he will go, and it’s not just Tsuna. If any of the family are in trouble and he is close enough to lend a hand, he is going to do so. It might mean that he sometimes has to cancel plans with his partner, it might mean that occasionally he will be gone from them for significant chunks of time. But he always comes back to them, doesn’t he? He does the best he can for them, doesn’t he? And besides, they’d known this about him from the start, he’d never hidden it. It was part of why he'd never really ever wanted a serious romantic relationship, but he couldn’t help falling in love with them, with how they’d snuck past all his walls and barriers. Couldn’t they admire his loyalty to his precious people and realize that he’d protect them with his life as well? Why did it always need to be this big fight? However, the truth is that his partner has valid points as well. It’s a horrible feeling to never get to feel important to the person you love the most. It hurts to be stood up or cancelled at the last minute, it hurts to never get as much quality time as you need and all of that on top of always worrying about Gokudera’s safety, because he does share the Mafia life with them, they do know the dangers. Unfortunately, I really don’t see Gokudera ever being fully willing to do much to compromise on this. He is who he is, he lives how he wants and needs to and his partner will have to find ways to accept him as he is, accept his life and his family, or there’s absolutely no hope of a future together.

Yamamoto has always had ambitions and goals and things he wants to do with his life. He wants to continue to play baseball, and I do think he does achieve his ambition of playing professionally, even just for a while. He has the Vongola and his family there, along with his father, that he wants to protect, cherish, and love. He has his sword and his determination to continue on the flawless, invincible Shigure Soen style. His relationship with his partner is just one of the many, many things going on in his life. It doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love his partner because he most certainly will. He deeply loves his partner, they’re the light of his life and are incredibly important to him. However, there’s other important things in his life and he needs them to understand that because his life will keep him busy. He’ll be on the road with his team and they’ll either need to be willing to uproot their life and travel with him or trust him to be away from them for so long. His family, of all varieties, are equally as important to him as his lover is and he’s going to do his best to make sure everyone’s needs are met, but that also does mean that sometimes he needs to prioritize and that can leave his partner feeling neglected. He hates when it happens but he’s only one man and tensions can run high on both sides. Once the initial flare of anger has faded though, he is someone who is willing to listen and communicate and the one most willing to find compromises.

Lambo’s biggest source of fighting with his partner? Believe it or not, it’s because Lambo grows up into someone who is a major flirt and likes to fancy himself a bit of a ladies man. He would never stoop to out and outright cheating, mind you. To him, such an act of utter betrayal and disloyalty is disgusting, but he does have a bad habit of flirting with both genders, if the person seems into him, flirts and flatters him, or is just really gorgeous. I also think Lambo has a really bad habit of, once he gets comfortable in a romantic relationship, stopping flirting with his lover. In his mind, there’s no reason to compliment them as much, to flirt and be super playful. That kind of stuff is for courtship and to let them learn how magnificent he believes they are and how much he loves them. Once they’re in a committed relationship for a bit, he figures his partner knows that without him having to do much to show it. It just…slips his mind. So, it’s no wonder for his partner to be hurt by him flirting with other people, especially if they’re not getting that kind of attention and it’s easy enough for his partner to get insecure. However, the good thing about Lambo is that, after there’s enough arguments with his partner, he’s really going to be able to accept that he’s probably fucking up somewhere and he’ll honestly be willing to listen to them if they want to tell him what they need. He honestly will need to hear it to realize what’s going on and once his partner lets him know that they need him to show them appreciation and once they let him know they need him to perhaps tell those flirting with him that he’s taken, he’ll try his best to work on it. He won’t ever stop flirting with people, it’s just a part of his nature, but he will try his best to make sure his partner knows he appreciates them, finds them beautiful, and would never jeopardize his relationship with them.

Hibari and Byakuran have the same issue with their partners. That is, obviously, that both men have serious commitment issues that will cause arguments in any relationship they get into. In Hibari’s case, he can’t stand the thought of being tied down to any one person or any one thing. He wants to be able to do what he wants, live how he wants to live, fight who he wants to fight, and go where he wants whenever he wants. He doesn’t want the absolute responsibility for another person. While he could be capable of entering a romantic relationship, it’s going to be a challenge and everything about it will have to be dictated by Hibari’s whims. It’s something he will make clear from the get-go. There will be no marriage, no happily ever after’s with children and happy families. That’s just never going to be something he wants, no matter how much he loves the person. Though fights are sure to arise from this issue, Hibari will shut them down right away or will just plain out walk away from his partner, sometimes for quite some length of time. His attitude, his way of living his life, is absolutely inflexible and he’s not going to consider, even for a moment, changing anything about it for his partner’s sake. Compromises aren’t his style so his partner will have to accept him as he is and be willing to live a life without those ideals of marriage, children, etc. If they can’t, he will make it clear that it’s best for both of them if they walk away from the relationship before either grows more attached.

In Byakuran’s case, he is honestly very changeable as a person. Even after Yuni helps him open up his heart, he’s someone who really does have a problem connecting with humanity. She opened up his heart after all, she didn’t take away his special powers. He’s already lived a million years and life is in some ways very boring for him. He’s a person who lives and acts entirely on his own whims and he can’t settle into one thing for any long period of time unless it’s something entirely new and potentially exciting. In his other lives, he’s done the whole marriage and kids and forever love kind of things. He knows the experience, it’s no longer novel. Because of this, and his own issues with indecision and tendency to wonder if the grass is greener on the other side, he has no desire for big commitments, like getting engaged or married, and there is a huge potential for him requesting an open relationship at some point during his time with his first, and most important partner.

Mukuro’s main source of arguments with his partner are actually two-fold. One is the most obvious potential for arguments, which is Mukuro’s habit of lying or telling only half-truths, obscuring his real goals, feelings, and motivations. The other is that he’s actually a rather poor communicator when it does come to himself. He’s completely emotionally closed off, with big strong walls separating him from people and that’s not something that will change throughout the years. While he definitely is capable of love and affection for others, letting them truly and completely in is something impossible for him. This can make forming true and lasting romantic relationships really difficult. It’s hard to always feel like your partner doesn’t trust you or that they’re keeping a distance from you and it’s understandable for his partner to bring it up every now and then, to try to communicate how it makes them feel to him. However, Mukuro is not someone who takes even mild criticisms well and it will turn into a verbal fight most of the time which results in him telling them to leave. His relationship will be very on-off for that reason unless his partner allows him to get away with everything.

With Xanxus, there is really no common source of arguments with his partner. The fact is that Xanxus has a really horrendous temper, even as he matures. Though the maturing does mean he gets a better grip on his temper, he still has that nasty temper that is always ready to explode, set on a very hair-trigger. The worst of it is that there’s no telling what will set his temper off. There’s the obvious things that his partner should never speak of in front of Xanxus (mentioning his defeat at the hands of Tsuna, suggesting that maybe he make up with Timoteo, criticism of any kind), the problem is that things that won’t upset Xanxus in one situation or on one day will at another time. His temper is unpredictable, even to him, so literally anything can cause fights with his partner and, unless they’re willing to face his wrath (and have excellent dodging skills) or unless they learn how to read his body language and control their own behaviour based on that, Xanxus’ partner is going to have to learn to live walking on eggshells really because he will not change.

Squalo’s most common sense of arguments with his partner is really a very obvious one. Squalo’s line of work and his lifestyle is an unconventional one and it’s one that he completely devotes himself to. His goal is to become the Sword Emperor and to serve Xanxus and nothing will stand in the way of that, even falling in love. His work is dangerous; he will come home injured, sometimes with bones broken, in horrible conditions. He will have to be away from his partner because of work, or even through choice, for considerable lengths of time at points. Much like some of the others mentioned, Squalo lives the way he likes, and he has no plans on changing his job, his hobbies, or how he lives in any way because in his mind, he is living the right way. Everything he does, in his mind, is the right thing and anyone who disagrees with it is in the wrong, which is a hard mindset to argue with. Because of that, arguments with his partner can get bad and in the end, his partner is going to have to learn to cope with his work with the Varia, with his ambitions as the Sword Emperor dragging him around the world, and with his devotion to Xanxus. None of these things will mean that Squalo won’t love his partner, but if they cannot handle living with those things, then the relationship is doomed.

Levi, Bluebell, and Daisy all have very similar topics and issues as the most common source of arguments with their respective partners. Levi has extreme jealousy issues and will be a very possessive partner. He struggles quite badly with his own insecurities, some of which are rather extremely felt. Because of this and because of the amazing (and often good-looking) men he’s around, he’s always scared that his partner is going to wake up and realize they can do better, and that insecurity will lead him to being jealous of any other person that his partner gets close to. What if they take his partner away? That fear and insecurity also drives him to want to keep his partner with him. In his mind, he’s as good as out of sight, out of mind to people and he’s scared that, between other people and not always having a lot of time with his partner, that they will forget about him or replace him. So, Levi can pick fights, accuse his partner of cheating or of caring about any other person in their life more than they care about him. He’ll pick arguments when he’s feeling insecure about everything, and he will try to separate his partner from friends that he feels they like more than him or that are too good-looking. He wants his partner’s life to almost revolve around him, because other than his work and his boss, Levi’s entire life will revolve around his partner. It is abusive, it is unhealthy, but he just can’t seem to stop himself.

Bluebell also gets extremely jealous. She wants to be the center of attention for her partner. They should be looking at her, complimenting her, playing with her, spending their time with her. She doesn’t want them to like anyone more than they like her and because of this, she will pick fights with not only her partner, but any of her partners friends that they bring around her. She’ll get really rude at those times – the only exception to this is her partner’s direct family members, who she will respect as she believes family is a very important thing. It won’t matter how many times her partner brings up that this is too much, that her rudeness is unfair and embarrasses them or that her partner can’t take it. Bluebell won’t change her actions and she honestly does assume that they’ll never leave her no matter what she does, because the two of them are in love.

Daisy, meanwhile, when they fall in love, is someone who wants to ‘own’ their lover. They want their lover to be theirs in entirety. Daisy’s lovers life will have to grow to be entirely based around their relationship with Daisy, around Daisy themselves. To Daisy, they do love their partner, but they feel entitled to their partner in all ways and might at times view their partner as a toy. Because of this entitlement, arguments with Daisy will really get their partner nowhere. They will either be used as a toy or they will have to try to leave Daisy, which comes with its own unique set of problems and troubles because if Daisy’s partner thought Daisy was possessive during their relationship, that’s nothing compared to a dumped Daisy.

Lussuria is someone who really is never fully satisfied. He has a problem with, even if he’s in love with one person, always wondering if the grass is greener on the other side. A true romanticist in his own way, Lussuria dreams of the perfect partner and the moment one of his relationships starts to show imperfections, he can get too focused on those and start wondering if there’s something better out there. He might even be easily tempted to cheat, even just emotionally or through paying male escorts. This can obviously affect his partner’s self-esteem, their trust in him, and their whole relationship and there will be numerous fights about it. Unless his partner leaves Lussuria or stays but opens up the relationship, this will be a continuing fight as no one person will ever be able to live up to Lussuria’s dream partner.

Both Belphegor and Zakuro have the same issue that causes the most arguments with their respective partners. Similar to Xanxus, both of these men have extreme tempers and serious anger issues. Belphegor’s temper is not only unpredictable and nasty, but it’s very violent and that extends to when he loses his temper with his partner. He throws temper tantrums, and he really doesn’t think anything of physically hurting, even attempting to murder, his partner when he loses his temper. This is obviously not going to sit right with his partner, but there’s really no talking to Belphegor and, if his partner tries to leave him before he is done with them, Belphegor will seriously make every effort to kill them in as brutal a way as he can. There is no fix for this issue and it’s something that just comes with a relationship with Belphegor. Honestly though, his partner should have seen the hints of how unhinged this man is before they decided to get together with him. Zakuro’s temper isn’t that bad. It’s more that he just gets angry really easy. He won’t physically hurt his partner, but he’s going to be violent and intimidating. There will be at least one hole in the drywall of their apartment from where he put his fist through a wall when he was angry. He really probably doesn’t even mean to scare his partner as much as he does; it’s just that Zakuro gets all consumed in his anger and can’t think at all. He’ll always apologize for his anger afterwards, promise he’ll do better next time, but the next time comes and it’s the same thing again. I think the only thing that would seriously make him attempt to change, to seek help with his anger issues, was if his partner were to leave him over it.

Both Irie and Spanner have bad habits of getting much too into their work and their passion projects. They will forget even the basics of sleeping and eating when they get in the zone, until those urges become undeniable. So, it’s really little wonder that they completely forget about their partner as well. They will forget dates or plans, standing up their partner because they don’t even think to message them to properly cancel. They will forget special occasions. They just won’t be around for their partner to support them. It’s no wonder, and very understandable, for their partners to sometimes get upset about this, especially if it continues on for weeks, as it sometimes can. Both men would feel absolutely horrible about making their partner feel bad and they will honestly try to apologize and do better, but they keep repeating the same patterns over and over because how into their work and their passions both men get are just huge parts of who they are as people.

Kikyo has the most boring source of arguments with his partner, the most mundane. The truth of the matter is that the thing he’ll fight with his partner the most about is finances and financial stressors. Kikyo, despite his extravagant appearance, is actually really financially smart. He’s a saver, not a spender, and he’s careful with his money. Part of it is really needing the security of knowing his bills will all be paid, that he and his partner will have the money needed to survive and thrive. If his partner has a habit of spending money on things, even if they can afford them, that Kikyo considers unnecessary, it will definitely spark arguments. Honestly, the two of them need to find a nice compromise between the two, and there’s definitely the potential for both of them to get there, but it will be after plenty of arguments around the subject, as Kikyo is proud and does believe that he is right in everything.

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lucky-clover-gazette · 5 months ago

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prince's gambit highlights & annotations

chapter 1

indented text is from the book. some quotes have commentary, some do not. some comments are serious, and some are definitely not. most of them will only make sense to people who have read the series. and, like, there are spoilers. so please read the books first if you're interested!

also: part of the reason i'm doing such a close reading is to study cs pacat's style, especially in terms of how she does romance and erotica. there are "craft notes" that might seem weird, like i'm being redundant or restating something rather than analyzing, but those are more things that i want to remember/take away from the writing!

i'm going to tag these longer posts with "sam reads capri" in case anyone wants to read them all at once.

this is a google doc i wrote with overall content warnings for the captive prince series. it's not perfect, but i do think it's important to include.

Across the courtyard, a couple of alaunt hounds came bounding down the stone stairs to throw themselves ecstatically at Laurent, who indulged one of them with a rub behind the ears, causing a spasm of jealousy in the other.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

the first thing laurent does in this book is pet a dog. i love him so much.

craft-wise, this foreshadows the shift in damen’s perception of laurent that occurs throughout book 2. his/our first impression of laurent in book 1 is him cruelly demeaning damen, almost like a dog, which is something we’re meant to hate. our first impression here is him affectionately indulging actual dogs who clearly know and love him. this might make the reader ask: why do these animals love laurent, when we understand him to be cruel? is our understanding incorrect, and/or incomplete?

context: in arles, the regent closely observes laurent’s attachments. he can and will destroy anything or anyone laurent cares about. but here, outside of arles, it makes sense that laurent would immediately feel more comfortable being affectionate.

laurent’s hot girl summer has officially begun ✨

Damen craned for a glimpse but, not being an owl, saw almost nothing.

The physician rummaged in the satchel and produced one of his endless ointments.

doesn’t this become a running gag? ointment reference #1

That was really too much. ‘It’s cosmetic?’

does damen take pride in his scars, and other physical indications of his experiences? that could be an interesting parallel to the cuffs throughout the series. or maybe he just knows he’s hot either way. or doesn’t want to be fussed over.

he is technically still laurent’s property—has laurent given any kind of indication that he finds the scars unattractive? or did paschal simply make that assumption, which laurent then went along with, knowing it would annoy damen?

The physician said, ‘I was told you would be difficult. Very well. The better it heals, the less your back will trouble you with stiffness, both now and later in life, so that you will be better able to swing a sword around, killing a great many people. I was told you would be responsive to that argument.’ ‘The Prince,’ said Damen.

paschal, sighing deeply as he commits laurent’s exact words to memory: i’m about to become the first homophobe in vere because these petty gay bitches can’t keep their nonsense to themselves

actually, new thing to count—every time a minor or secondary character has a valid reason to complain about damen and laurent’s lack of professionalism in the workplace. this is lamen hr complaint #1 (paschal).

But of course. All this tender care of his back, like soothing with a kiss the reddened cheek you have slapped.

great line.

connects to an ongoing theme: niceness vs. goodness. damen “sees through” laurent’s niceness, as it conflicts with laurent’s meanness that he personally has experienced. in the same way damen has a favorable bias towards kastor and the regent, he has an automatically unfavorable bias against laurent. which is totally fair, given the events of book 1! but this is a new book, and a new stage in damen’s overall series arc.

additional theme for books 2&3: tenderness. a wound is tender; it aches in need of soothing. but what soothes an ache? tender care. if nice is good and mean is bad, where does a concept like tenderness fit in? how exactly will we go from “all this tender care of his back, like soothing with a kiss the reddened cheek you have slapped” to “i think if i gave you my heart, you would treat it tenderly”?

Damen snorted. ‘It wasn’t that bad.’

a consistent damen behavior: the refusal to admit that he is helplessness, and/or experiencing circumstances beyond his control. i would call it toxic masculinity, but i don’t think it’s meant as gender commentary—it has more to do with being a prince and a king, worthy of the throne. toxic royalty, if you will.

‘If you served the King,’ said Damen, ‘how is it you now find yourself in the Prince’s household, and not his uncle’s?’ ‘Men find themselves in the places they put themselves,’ Paschal said, closing his satchel with a snap.

laurent of vere: the people’s prince ✨

also, interesting juxtaposition with previous dialogue about damen and paschal both being at marlas, on different sides of the battle. can we truly say that damen, at age 19, had put himself there? what does that suggest about his character and his kingdom?

‘Yes, of course,’ said Damen. Then stopped. Jord didn’t notice.

he needs acting classes from laurent

Damen said, ‘If you’re not going to tip your head back, why don’t we go find Paschal? He can give you a scented ointment.’

HA. ointment reference #2.

Damen thought of the ivory and gold casing that held a creature duplicitous, self-serving and untrustworthy. ‘You’re so loyal to him. Why is that?’

really nailing in the damen perspective subversion setup. also, the irony re: aimeric's loyalty!

Damen joined the work, where he was the only man to smell, expensively, of ointments and cinnamon.

ointment reference #3. he’s expensive.

‘Aimeric’s young. He says it won’t happen again,’ said Jord. It will happen again, and once the two factions in this camp start retaliating against one another your campaign is over, he didn’t say.

i love how we finally get to see damen in his element here, after experiencing The Horrors for 13 + prologue entire chapters in book 1

‘The Captain is in one of the horse stalls, up to his waist in the stableboy,’ said Jord. ‘The Prince has been waiting for him at the barracks. Actually . . . I was told to have you fetch him.’ ‘From the stables,’ said Damen. He stared at Jord in disbelief.

laurent wastes no time before assigning damen unpleasant tasks. does this count as an hr complaint? i mean it would be damen doing the complaining, am i counting charges they have against each other? no. they’d wreck the curve.

Inside, Govart was unambiguously fucking the stableboy against the far wall.

“unambiguously”

‘The Prince stays here often?’ The castellan mistook him to mean the keep, not the rooms. ‘Not often. He and his uncle came here a great deal together, in the year or two after Marlas. As he grew older, the Prince lost his taste for the runs here. He now comes only rarely to Chastillon.’

context: >:(

Laurent said, ‘I have saved you till last.’ Damen said, ‘You owe the stableboy a copper sol.’ ‘The stableboy should learn to demand payment before he bends over.’

“honey, i’m home!” sitcom entrance

‘Your virtue’s safe. It’s just water. Probably.’

somebody’s feeling playfulllll

Laurent placed the goblet carefully back on the table, and picked up the knife. It was a sharp knife, made for cutting meat. Damen felt his pulse quicken as Laurent came forward. Only a handful of nights ago, he had watched Laurent slit a man’s throat, spilling blood as red as the silk that covered this room’s bed. He felt shock as Laurent’s fingers touched his, pressing the hilt of the knife into his hand. Laurent took hold of Damen’s wrist below the gold cuff, firmed his grip, and drew the knife forward so that it was angled towards his own stomach. The tip of the blade pressed slightly into the dark blue of his prince’s garment. ‘You heard me tell Orlant to leave,’ said Laurent. Damen felt Laurent’s grip slide down his wrist to his fingers, and tighten. Laurent said, ‘I am not going to waste time on posturing and threats. Why don’t we clear up any uncertainty about your intentions?’

laurent explaining to damen that his behavior in arles was a bit in the most insane way possible

He was so infuriatingly sure of himself, proving a point. Damen felt desire come hard upon him: not wholly a desire for violence, but a desire to drive the knife into Laurent’s composure, to force him to show something other than cool indifference.

they’re so normal and well-adjusted

He said: ‘I’m sure there are house servants still awake. How do I know you won’t scream?’ ‘Do I seem like the type to scream?’ ‘I’m not going to use the knife,’ said Damen, ‘but if you’re willing to put it in my hand, you underestimate how much I want to.’ ‘No,’ said Laurent. ‘I know exactly what it is to want to kill a man, and to wait.’

“yes, and” “yes, and” “yes, and”

Laurent said, ‘When this campaign is over, I think—if you are a man and not a worm—you will attempt to gain retribution for what has happened to you. I expect it. On that day, we roll the dice and see how they fall. Until then, you serve me. Let me therefore make one thing above all clear to you: I expect your obedience. You are under my command. If you object to what you are told to do I will hear reasoned arguments in private, but if you disobey an order once it is made, I will send you back to the flogging post.’

this is their starting place for the book! “we hate each other, we owe each other nothing, we know that we are going to eventually attempt to kill each other—but for now, we are calling a truce and working together”

also. would laurent still love damen if he was a worm 🥺

Another pause, and then Laurent indicated once again to the chair. This time Damen followed his prompt and sat. Laurent took the chair opposite. Between them, unfurled on the table, was all the intricate detail of the map. ‘You said you knew the territory,’ Laurent said.

this is part of why i love damen and laurent so much as a pairing. they have interests and skills in common, and they make a genuinely good team. they’re intellectually compatible, in addition to sexually and romantically compatible.

#you can tell i'm more relaxed with these because there aren't like atrocities happening every other page #capri #sam reads capri #captive prince #prince's gambit #laurent of vere #damen of akielos #lamen

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tamelee · 10 months ago

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Hi… what do you think about people hating on naruto and saying that sasuke deserves better than naruto and that he doesn't love sasuke as deeply as sasuke does. And the way he talks in ch 698 like he doesn't want to come out. And he marries the first girl who chases after him to hide his sexuality like a closet gay behavior and live up to society's expectations (following according to his mother's word). Sasuke looked soo sad in Gaiden because Naruto had rejected his love for him. Some SNS shippers say that's why they hate Naruto.

I highly doubt you’re talking about SNS shippers/fans though. I have a feeling I know exactly what kind of stans these are because they’ll take every opportunity to hate on Naruto (and other characters as well). And if such people do claim they are then I’m pretty sure that the ‘🍥’ joining the ‘🍅’ is just in the bio for show. As if to say, ‘I ship SNS, therefore my unsolicited and biased criticism against Naruto is extra valid :)’ when it’s really not, (and vice versa) but I‘ll spare you the rant.

Using secondary source material (anything ’Boruto’) in order to invalidate main source material (’Naruto’ Manga) to then try and rationalize secondary source material-outcomes (the sequel) with assumptions to fill the gap in between these two (blank period) when it’s completely void of all previous logic in the first place, makes a well grounded argument in what way exactly?

In other words; why the hell would you look at the sequel and willing let that change your perspective as if it holds any merit to what we’ve already come to learn?

There is nothing wrong with a good hypothesizing session. I know from experience it can be somewhat soothing to rationalize a way towards something unwanted. In this case, it’s the sequel. ‘Gaiden’ is interesting for its own reasons. It’s sort of like, trying to come up with an explanation that makes an outcome seem a little less… bad. Which becomes easier because Naruto and Sasuke’s misery is fully on display. In the case of these haters though, they make it worse and just blame a character for a company’s money-grabbing decision. To let that be the deciding factor for them that fuels these unhinged claims about him being a bootlicker that acts through hatred or whatever strange mumbo-jumbo they also come up with. But anytime someone tries to make an argument about ‘Naruto’ and uses “because in ‘Boruto’…” you can already cast it aside as invalid.

Connecting two unrelated idea’s doesn’t say nor prove anything. You can’t even disprove it either because the argument doesn’t make any sense.

So it’s also ironic to hate on Naruto using Ch. 698 as an excuse to say he ‘doesn’t love Sasuke as deeply as Sasuke does’, when it’s primarily Naruto trying to explain how deeply he loves Sasuke as best as he can lol. I’m not sure if I’m impressed by the creativity or just dumbfounded that someone can read Ch. 698 and then come to such an irrelevant conclusion as if it has anything to do with ‘coming out’. It’s like having a conversation with someone about a very specific type of bird when another person barges in to ask why they’re discussing how to create your own carrousel. And besides, Naruto may exaggerate his denial profusely when someone brings it up (which is by itself very telling), but he never was good at hiding how he felt about Sasuke or how far he’d go (literally the entire story), even threatening war on behalf of Sasuke, dragging Konoha in it, indicating revenge for Sasuke if he’s harmed when really it was just a matter of his own personal feelings. As… obviously Konoha couldn’t care less and in fact would most likely side against Naruto anyway. He’s already boldly shared his intimate thoughts with the entire world during the war though, didn’t he. He literally connected his Chakra with everyone and spilled his brainrot about him freely.

You can create your very own narrative towards the outcome that is ‘Boruto’ and make it as crazy as you want, but it will still be based on assumptions. In fact, go ahead and write that story if you must, they tried and failed with Hinata’s movie for a reason. I'm sure an SNS-fan can do a better job, in fact, they have.

The idea that Naruto would probably struggle to accept how he feels and what it means, could very well be true. It would definitely be conflicting with the role he is expected to play as Hokage and it’s also something I’m exploring in the story I’m writing. But, so would it be possible that Sasuke will struggle, because we haven’t forgotten that love caused him to experience the most horrible pain through betrayal, yes? Naruto does care about how he’s perceived and he is a people-pleaser that was on a journey to realize that there is a difference between the conditions he must meet in order to soothe his sense of feeling unworthy of love and the unconditional love Sasuke proved to hold for him, regardless of anything else. “Because I feel relieved just looking at you as it reminds me of the love I’ve lost”.

Acknowledging is one thing, accepting is a whole other and then taking the action-steps to pursue it freely would imo require another story which would’ve been a fitting follow-up after Ch. 699 if that was even possible in the first place for Kishimoto to do. But it’s not.

Stop for one second and think about the amount of value you put onto the money-grabbing shit-stain on the franchise that is ‘Boruto�� and whether you want that bullshit, no matter the label, to invalidate everything you’ve loved about it in the first place. Rationalizing something when the bridge toward it is missing completely and where the outcome isn’t followed by logic is just people inventing an explanation to justify their own unhappiness with something. Aka; their hatred for Naruto.

#asktamelee #naruto talk #anti naruto ending #cw boruto

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summersmithlatinxgyatt · 3 months ago

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The following is a really rough theory of mine that also involves Summer. I’m going to keep it at all at a very questionable pace because it sounds very far-fetched, but it has understandable proof. Let’s just start out with a question that I’m not gonna answer very well 💀

Is Summer smart?

…no seriously, that’s the question of the day. Is Summer smart or dumb?

You can say she’s just kind of a dumb teen girl, but there’s some nuance to it that warrants a theory to be made.

She mentions that she chooses to get decent grades instead of being an A+ student. She doesn’t really go on about any classes other than Spanish class (which she cheats her way into), since we know she stopped attending flute practice. However, she’s been shown to be very smart in battle and with Rick. The two of them are an unstoppable force, but we only see that happen with our Summer and our Rick.

Looking at the Gazorpazorp episode, I think that’s what cemented their relationship. So if Summer wasn’t accidentally brought along, she wouldn’t have been brought along ever again and have that trust be built up.

Realistically, no other Rick has had this incident and no other Rick probably has any reason to have Summer work with them. Every reason DOES have an inverse argument though. The most obvious one is that Morty blocks the brainwaves and Summer doesn’t, but that also means Summer can’t be tracked and is a surprise ally.

That being said, it’s likely that every Summer is told to stay in a “dumb” state because it is literally illegal to be around Rick and be a part of his life. That could very much be the reason. Summer always does what she wants, which includes being mediocre at school.

Her Night Summer personality is also the one who has to learn Spanish, so deep down she’s wanted this but somehow can’t or doesn’t want to.

My theory is that, since the Council of Ricks rules that Summer cannot be radicalized, Rick keeps her as distracted as possible as he focuses on himself or Morty in the meantime.

I also don’t know how valid this next point is, but Night Summer doesn’t know her Twitter password. This could be because the surface-level Summer is really being forced into just being on the side and being on her phone 24/7

I’ve brought up this scene from the GoTron episode. Every other family member is interacting with themselves or each other. Summer isn’t. She’s just still on her phone

Except our main Summer, of course

I WAS going to go on about how maybe Rick built her a phone that is so addicting that it keeps her attention at all times or it lowers her intelligence. Our Rick was able to detect that Mr. Needful’s microscope was going to make him reta- I mean, less intelligent. But keep in mind that:

A) Our Rick is the smartest Rick. Other Ricks are likely not doing this kind of stuff. Also this is just to make it clear what I mean by “Rick”.

B) Our Rick doesn’t suppress Summer anymore

I think it’s likely other Ricks might have done this? It’s probably just a healthy dose of neglect

One more thing. I pointed out in a theory about the fascist dimensions that Wasp Morty was looking at fascist propaganda online that the Citadel was using to radicalize others and come back after Rick took them down. If the Citadel of Ricks considered having Summer work with Rick a crime, then maybe alternate Summers have their phones connected to a similar network that keeps them suppressed and docile. The entire point of that aforementioned Mr. Needful scene was the basis of Rick removing curses and traps from other items and technology. He can remove this theoretical Citadel suppressing network from Summer’s phone, he hates them

#rick and morty #summer smith #summer #rick sanchez #rick and morty theory #rick and morty headcanons #headcanon

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that-ari-blogger · 3 months ago

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So, You Have an Exam Tomorrow (Boys' Night Out)

It’s ok to not like something.

In terms of fiction, something not working for you is not a cardinal sin on either your part or the part of that story. Art is, by definition, subjective, so having a preference is the point of all this.

I take issue with the idea that someone might have “bad taste” in music or stories, defined simply as being contrary to the general consensus. Because, since when is being unique an inherently bad thing? If someone enjoyed the Percy Jackson movie, more power to them. If someone didn’t like Bloodborne, that doesn’t make their preferences any less valid.

But, this does provide an interesting conundrum for analysis that you will probably be familiar with already. How do you analyse something that you found uninteresting or unpleasant?

In short, you focus on the things that you like.

Let me explain.

SPOILERS AHEAD (She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, The Great Gatsby)

If you hadn’t guessed by my extremely subtle implication, I dislike Boys’ Night Out, and that is putting it mildly. But this isn’t a review blog, it’s an analysis, which means the framework is slightly different.

The point of analysis is to explore what the text is communicating to its audience and to justify your own reading of that. It is to create an argument based off evidence provided.

So, I could talk about the reasons for my hatred towards this episode, but that doesn’t really help anyone. I’m not trying to convince you whether or not to watch this episode, I’m presenting a theory for what it means.

The issue here, is that if a work of fiction doesn’t work for you, there is a disconnect between it and yourself. This means that you are less likely to enjoy analysing it, hampering your ability to engage with it.

This is one of the larger issues that I take with how the school curriculum in my country. It explores themes through texts, with preset ideas and steps for getting there.

This is fine. Stories have been used as a vehicle for understanding since the birth of humanity. But, come on. Australian students don’t need to learn exactly what F. Scott Fitzgerald thought about the American Dream. They need to learn about how to recognise what a person is talking about, and how to infer from what has been left out, or when someone is projecting. Crucially though, they need to learn how to better communicate their own ideas.

If you give someone a green light, they’ll see the future for a moment. If you teach them to make their own, suddenly their whole world has been illuminated forever.

Which brings me to Boys’ Night Out, and if you allow me, I’d like to show off what I mean and maybe help out some people who are struggling with this kind of thing.

I am a visual learner, so let’s examine a few shots from this episode and see if they convey a theme we can look for.

A group of people cheering and having fun. Not much at the surface value, but if we dive a little deeper, this is in Salineas. This is people who are under siege, whose homes are under threat, whose lives have been made better for the moment through the camaraderie of the tavern.

For the first time in the episode, the one true queen looks happy. Specifically, because she has been given something to do. That joy is actively interrupting an argument going on between Glimmer and Adora, keeping that friendship from falling apart for just a while longer.

Which means that we have a theme to work with. This is an episode about finding happiness in the dark times, and specifically the importance of doing that. According to this episode, joy is what keeps you going.

The princesses are fighting to protect the wonder of those in their kingdoms, and there’s more than one way to do that. You can stand in the way of those trying to destroy it, or you can cultivate that emotion and allow it to grow naturally.

Notably, Sea Hawk is a bard, he plays support and inspires people. The episode opens with Sea Hawk trying his hardest to lead people to safety, and when that option has failed, he stands resolute between the cannon and its targets. He’s reassuring and real, and his smile is constantly on display.

Even when Glimmer saves him, he has a joke to make to lighten the mood.

Later on, the episode explicitly positions Sea Hawk and Mermista growing closer as an opposite to Adora and Glimmer. The one true queen is looking constantly to her bard, while Bow is left staring at the sunset, watching the best friend squad go their separate ways.

Here comes step two of this master plan, diversity of evidence. If you are writing an essay for an exam, this is one of the things that will get you marks. If not, it's still useful. Once again, analysis is about communication, and that takes multiple forms.

In this case, I think the most important dialogue of the episode contrasts with the thing about joy and camaraderie, in that it’s about the Best Friend Squad falling apart.

“Well, maybe your best isn’t good enough. If it was, my mother would still be here.”

If a piece of evidence doesn’t work with the individual theme you are going for, maybe don’t use it. Not everything will work on that, maybe there are other ideas being explored at the same time. Alternatively, just slap the word “contrastingly” at the start of your paragraph and you’ll be fine. Talk about how different the themes are, and how they don’t work together at all. Maybe that’s intentional, who knows? You do.

And in your analysis, Fitzgerald contrasts the repeated metaphors of light and dark with the crowded party spaces to draw on biblical ideas of space most used in gothic cathedral designs.

Here, for example, I can draw this line in particular to my overarching theme of the cycle of abuse. Specifically, how trauma causes itself in others.

This isn’t a callout post. Being traumatized and being a bad person are not synonymous. I’m saying that trauma responses are often selfish, that’s part of why they are so insidious. Trauma has a habit of making you self-centred and defensive, to the detriment of those around you. In this case, Glimmer’s trauma response has been to blame Adora.

Glimmer has grown up as a rebellious princess, and she has kept that as she became queen. She never really found closure, so the anarchistic habits have been translated over to Adora, who in turn has taken an authoritative role in an attempt to protect everyone.

The difference here, is that this is so out of left field. We see why Glimmer would think that. She has naturally sought someone to blame and the only person who came within 100 miles of Angella’s “death” was Adora, but that doesn’t make her responsible.

I’m going to side with Adora here and say that Glimmer is entirely in the wrong for this, and it is this outburst that will cause the rest of this season to go as it does.

This contrasts with the theme of camaraderie and joy to imply a sense of directionality. Being together lifts you up, while the trauma keeps you apart, and makes you fall together.

Final Thoughts

Ok, biases. I detest this episode because of how jarring the tone is. Specifically, Sea Hawk tries to make everyone feel better by turning the war story into a musical, which I find takes me out of the story. I can feel the hand of the author so heavily in this episode, especially because of how much Sea Hawk warps the setting.

Show me an episode of things going bad and the bard with no braincells going all out with the support and momentum. Show me a plan that nearly fails but is saved by moments when this dumbass manages to keep his smile through utter disaster, and that inspires others to push forwards and succeed.

That is the premise of Sea Hawk’s role in No Princess Left Behind, and he isn’t any smarter in that episode, the show is just less embarrassed by him.

I do hope my complaints about this episode haven’t pushed you away, I did try to say something interesting other than that.

Next week, however, I will be talking about hero, one of my favourite episodes of the series. So, stick around if that interests you.

Previous - Next

#rants #literary analysis #literature analysis #what's so special about...?#character analysis #spop #she ra and the princesses of power #she ra #spop glimmer #spop sea hawk #spop mermista #mermista can do no wrong #mermista is the one true queen #all praise is due to Mermista #Admiral Scurvy #essay writing #how to write an essay #how to analysis

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searchingforatrail · 1 year ago

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complex megop opinions below!

Not necessarily positive or negative, just a very objective view of it and how fandom sees it vs. other ships with a similar dynamic.

This isn’t ship hate, because it’s my OTP. It’s just a realistic look at MegOp spurred on by the fact that I tend to see people overlook the obvious issues for moral points. Meaning, I’ve run upon some sort of hate towards megastar shippers from some megop shippers, usually with people accusing the former of being unhealthy and abusive, and i’m like, the latter isn’t?

And not just the ship, but people too.

I credit most of the great development and realistic approach towards a positive MegOp portrayal to fans, given that in most media we have of them, their relationship starts out great and disintegrates into one of the most tragic relationships of all time. Not only because they fall out, but because they hurt each other, drastically. Megatron, arguably more. Not only does he hurt Optimus, he targets him by harming those close to him. Whether it’s children or his closest friends, he personally hurts those around Optimus.

In Prime, it’s arguably worse. Because it’s not just physical, but it’s psychological too. Especially during the Orion Pax saga.

And the same could be said about Optimus to Megatron as well. Initially. Just in a different light. Optimus, a privilege mech, using his position and power to speak over Megatron, to dismiss his want to use violence and overthrow a government who abused him, etc., is a great example of an abuse of power.

And I always stand by the fact that Megatron was 100% within his rights to want to use violence to hurt those who hurt him.

In IDW both have an entire conversation about how badly they’ve hurt each other, Megatron flat out admits to wanting to hurt Optimus by hurting people around him. He knows what emotionally fucks with his closest friend, and proceeds to do it on a galactic level. Repeatedly.

But people aren’t supposed to interact with megop shippers because they ship megastar? On the basis of abuse and/or an unhealthy relationship?

What makes them different? A lot, i’m sure. There’s an arguably closer work relationship with Megatron and Starscream, the abuse is physical and psychological. There’s a larger power imbalance, and it’s over the span of a longer time. Starscream has less of a chance to fight back as opposed to Optimus, and the relationship between Megatron and Starscream is not always as equal as Megatron and Optimus’s.

So it’s much easier to say “This is an unhealthy relationship”.

But that’s canon. Shippers and artist work very diligently to change it, fix it, and write happy endings to it that end pretty well. They’ve worked to create complex endings to an abusive ship, very similar to how canon and fanon writers have done the exact same thing to Megatron and Optimus.

But the bottom line is that both ships are very unhealthy. At least a a point. They don’t start that way, and they might not end that way, but a significant chunk of time, they are very, very unhealthy. And the even bottomer line is that fans work very hard to give it a healthier ending--both ships.

And that said, I don’t understand the vitriol that comes from MegOp shippers to Megastar shippers, especially when both ships have similar dynamics.

I guess the argument is that “well, one ship is more abusive/unhealthy than the other”, but you get in a weird space when you start to say one version of abuse is more valid than the other.

And don’t get me wrong, there are stark differences between both ships. I do think Starscream is in a place where he experiences abuse more, but that doesn’t make Megop unhealthy or a morally superior ship. It doesn’t it any less hypocritical to add “megastars dni/megastars get hit by trucks/i hate megastar shippers” on your profile on the basis of abuse or unhealthy relationships if you ship MegOP.

I think it’s just dismissive of what both megatron and optimus go through during their time together, because their unhealthiness is acceptable. And that leaves a very sour taste in my mouth.

So yeah, those are just my thoughts. I welcome another perspective, just be kind about it.

And I love MegOp. Megatron and Optimus are my favorite characters. but I also know the ship is the most complex ship, imo, to date in transformers. and it’s not without it’s fair share of pain and agony. But why is their dynamic okay. why does it give is the right to be crappy towards other shippers who ship a similar dynamic to ours?

#megop #megastar #megatron #starscream #optimus #transformers prime

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chevelleneech · 3 months ago

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I don’t know why he does what he does, but imo, nothing really points to him having romantic feelings for Jungkook or men in general. Obviously I can’t know that for sure, but Tae honestly just seems like an eccentric and tactile person who isn’t homophobic.

what are your thoughts on tae making ignorant/homophobic remarks about jimin liking men "too much" and saying his (jm) mental state is bad? also jimin's responses that he's not like that to tae?

both times were in reference to jimin's feelings towards jk

(1) jimin was asked on a show why he liked jk so much https://x.com/PJMGGUKlE/status/1237101666098393088

(2) jimin was excited to sit next to jk https://x.com/thekmbasis/status/1792287699144962444

I knew someone was going to send me an ask about this, but I stand by what I said.

Tae’s comments are from a near decade ago, and while I will not tell people to forget or forgive, I do think it’s necessary to view how he and Jimin interact going forward. What he said was ignorant, as you pointed out, but is it not also true he and Jimin went on to have a solid friendship that both of them have discussed as meaningful to them?

So my opinion is that, much like Joon’s cosplay as a Black rapper, and Jimin’s colorist comment back in the day… Tae was being ignorant, but his past actions when he was arguably less informed are not defining of who he is today.

What should define him today, are his current actions, which I have said make good enough reason to dislike him, but no one is bringing it up even though I’m 100% sure you all can guess what I’m referring to. So he isn’t really a member I feel the same way about as I used to, but most of the reasons I’m seeing people dislike him are rooted in how the belief he is mistreating Jimin and JK, and I find that ridiculous. It stems directly from assuming Jikook is real, but if people didn’t think so, there wouldn’t be as much concern over how much he posts about JK.

To talk about his comments specifically though, I will say I do think they were steeped in truth. I think Jimin went through a very obvious sexuality crisis early on, as he basically confirmed on camera as he cried about what he’d tell his younger self. I think it takes a lot of sweeping under the rug and being intentionally blind to believe he was referring to anything else, and with how consistent hr has been with referencing bisexual colors and concepts… I think Jimin is most likely bisexual.

Why would his best friend then out him or even tease him about it, especially a few years before he feels comfortable in his own skin? I don’t know. I don’t know if they were going through an argument back then or a transitional stage in their friendship. I don’t know if Tae was raised in a more homophobic environment than the others, so he had a more difficult time wrapping his head around some he loved being queer. I don’t know if he felt protective of JK or of the group, so he was trying to play it off as a joke that didn’t land well. I don’t know if he was harboring his own internalized queerphobia (I don’t think he is queer, but that doesn’t mean I’m right). I really and truly don’t, but I do think it’s both a necessary and unnecessary part of Vmin/Tae history to keep in mind.

Reason being, he currently hasn’t shown any evidence of holding the same thoughts regarding queerness and Jimin. He seems fine being assumed queer and inserting himself in queer spaces. However, if someday he continues that sort of language, then yeah, it’s completely valid to assume him to have always been homophobic yet did a good job at playing otherwise.

Lastly, I’d imagine Jimin’s responses to Tae were purely instinctual rebuffing. Again, I do think Jimin is bi, so since he was probably going through his realization period or his “I know I’m not straight, but I don’t want other people to know!” period, it was natural for him to try and brush Tae off with his own joke. That’s me assuming of course, because he could have also been cool with what Tae was saying because he knew there was no malice behind it, and just wanted to make it seem like Tae was more jealous he wasn’t getting Jimin’s attention instead.

I could play the guessing game all day, but only the members know what happened.

#kim taehyung

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selfdestructivecat · 2 years ago

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If I see one more person misconstrue good-faith criticism against Thomas Sanders and the way he’s handling his series, I’m going to scream.

Yes, there are people who genuinely despise the man, and are nitpicking anything that can prove that he is an evil person. There are people who are constantly pestering Thomas about the long wait, demanding the content they want this instant. Those people aren’t being productive with their criticism, and I can understand being frustrated with them. Hell, I’M frustrated with them!

But there ARE valid criticisms. Thomas has recently been very bad with handling questions about the series, as his recent Twitter posts have shown, and he hasn’t been transparent about what’s going on with Sanders Sides.

If you don’t take anything else away from this post, THAT’S what we’re upset about. We aren’t upset about the wait itself. We will GLADLY wait days, months, YEARS for this series we love. We already HAVE waited years, and we likely will continue to do so! But we don’t know what’s going ON. He has given us very few updates, and in the few updates he has given us, he has been INCREDIBLY VAGUE.

And he CAN BE VAGUE, just ACKNOWLEDGE IT.

“Hey guys! This series is taking longer than I thought it would for reasons I don’t feel comfortable disclosing! I can’t give you an exact date for when the next part will be out because I don’t know when it’ll be done, but it will take a long time! Please be patient, thank you!”

THAT’S IT! That’s all we want! But as far as I know, he hasn’t announced an official hiatus or anything of the sort. He has just said that he’s “working on it”, which doesn’t tell us ANYTHING.

If he is prioritizing Roleslaying or another project, THAT’S FINE! Just TELL US, so we don’t expect something we aren’t going to get!

People have brought up how the series used to be as part of their argument, on both sides. The production quality was lower, but updates were more frequent. I won’t argue about which era of the series was better. But the point I want to make is that Thomas set up a precedent. After years of this series, we’ve come to expect this type of update schedule.

And now, obviously, it’s changed. And that’s FINE. But when a precedent has been established, and then it’s changed without any kind of announcement, it’s reasonable that people are confused and kinda thrown off! And we would be a lot less confused if Thomas would TELL US WHAT’S GOING ON!

I don’t know Thomas personally. I’ve never interacted with him. I’m sure he’s a lovely man. But he can be a wonderful person AND be irresponsible interacting with his fans. Not every bit of criticism thrown at Thomas is a direct attack against his character! Kindness and irresponsibility aren’t mutually exclusive! And yes, there ARE people using these recent tweets as attacks against Thomas as a person. You can be upset about that. But there are also people analyzing these responses and (rightfully so in my opinion) asking for some accountability!

I understand that he’s frustrated! I would be as well, in his circumstance! And there ARE people who are being incredibly rude and unhelpful in demanding that Thomas pump out Sanders Sides content at a faster pace! That is incredibly unreasonable!

But that isn’t what everyone is saying to him! Many people are being perfectly polite and asking for the smallest bit of clarity! And yes, this can also be really frustrating! But it isn’t completely unwarranted! When you don’t say anything, people ask questions! And the best way to stop people from asking questions? ANSWER SOME OF THEM!

You can still be a fan of the series that Thomas made AND be critical of him and the series. The fact that we take the time to express and convey these criticisms in a manner we hope to be constructive is a testament to the love we have for it, and the potential we don’t feel it’s reaching. So don’t you DARE suggest that we are any less part of this fandom, or “fake fans”, because we see some flaws in the system. We can love something and acknowledge it’s flaws. You are no better than us because you are standing on the other side of this argument.

If I’ve missed anything, which I likely have, then feel free to correct anything I’ve gotten incorrect. I know my perspective may have some gaps. But I’d like to have a conversation with someone who disagrees with me, rather than someone seeing the words “ts criticism” and immediately assuming that we are ungrateful little shits who hate everything Thomas stands for.

Once again, I apologize for the wave of criticism on my blog. You are more than welcome to unfollow or block me of that makes you upset, no hard feelings on my side. But I wanted to say something, and I doubt my stance will change. I hope, going forward, that we can discuss the ups and downs of this series without fingers being pointed or accusations being thrown. From BOTH sides.

#ts criticism #ts critical #my ramblings #my rants #rant #im so fucking tired…#won’t tag as sanders sides because I know people don’t want to see this on the main tag #but I will add it if people ask #I’m sorry about my aggressive tone #I know I didn’t present my argument in the most diplomatic fashion #you can be upset at me for that reason. I completely understand #also this is NOT about anyone specific #I’ve just seen this thrown around a lot today #and I needed to get this out of my system #so if you think this is about you: it isn’t #feel free to DM me if you feel hurt by something I said #or think I WAS targeting you specifically #I’m more than happy to talk things through

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longlivebatart · 1 year ago

Text

Episode 2- Twelfth Night

Welcome to Long Live Bat Art, the podcast for art lovers who don’t see art as much as they want to. My name is Sydney and thank you for taking this slow tour through an art gallery with a casual art lover. Today, I’ll be talking about Twelfth Night by Jan Steen. I hope you enjoy.

Jan Steen was born in Leiden in 1626. Twenty years later he went to Leiden University, which is why we know his birth year- the rest of the details of his birth are a mystery. Because he was college educated, he was exposed to literature and mythology outside of his own Catholic mythology.

In 1648 he, along with Gabriel Metsu, founded the ‘Painters’ Guild of St. Luke’ in that city. St. Luke is the patron saint of artists, which makes him the prime candidate for having an artists’ guild named after him. His teachers included Nicolaus Knupfer, Adriaen van Ostade, and Jan van Goyen. He ended up marrying the daughter of van Goyen, Margriet.

Steen was inspired by not only history and mythology but also by real life, especially those who tend to poke fun at real life. He painted a few pieces about Rhetoricians, who were actors in the theater. That isn’t surprising, considering that his uncle was a Rhetorician in Steen’s home town. There’s a few pieces of other evidence that Steen drew from theater and actors rather than real life- several of his paintings show so-called doctors who often make false diagnoses. These doctors are shown dressed in the way of a century before, which makes a valid argument for being a man dressed in a costume of a doctor rather than an actual medical professional.

Steen likely didn’t have very many students. In fact, only a single painter is speculated to have been one- Richard Brakenburg. But despite the lack of direct students, his work influenced many others.

He was prolific. According to Tobias van Westrheene he painted 500 paintings, and Hofstede de Groot said 1000. Because of how many he painted, 350 of them survive.

And apparently, the Dutch have a proverb about Jan Steen that I won’t try to pronounce. But the English translation is ‘a Jan Steen household’, which means more or less to have a messy house. Which, savage. That’s what my legacy would be, though. But it probably doesn’t refer to Steen’s actual lack of housekeeping, but the lived-in interiors of his works instead.

Arnold Houbraken was a so-called biographer who admitted that his ‘research’ came solely from Steen’s paintings when he wrote that Steen’s paintings were drawn from his life, just as his lifestyle was like his paintings. Houbraken’s assessments must be taken with a mountain of salt, seeing as how most of his biographies of other painters have been proven to have been largely made up or drawn from the artist’s work rather than the artist. There may be truth in the notion that you can only make art of any kind from your own experience, but you are not your work and you’re not always the same person as who you choose to base art on.

Now, onto the painting.

If you took a prior look at this artwork and decided I was insane for trying to describe it, you might be right. But it was such an interesting work I figured I had to try.

It’s a table at a large dinner. Nine adults and two children are clustered at it, some standing and some sitting. There are four adults in the background at the extreme right of the piece, all seated.

The center of the painting is dominated by a woman reclining on a chair, her right arm over the back of it and looking over that shoulder to look at a child. The reclining woman is wearing a white bonnet she’s untied to be loose around her head. Strands of her dark blonde hair are shown curled over her forehead. Her face is relaxed and she’s smiling softly. Her cheeks are rosy in good health, or maybe just a lot of wine. She’s wearing a white garment that’s more revealing than I thought was permitted back then- you can see the skin of her throat, some of her shoulders, and cleavage. She’s wearing a bright orange corset, and a long dark mustard skirt that looks like it’s made of velvet or a similar material. It has the look of it when you stroke it the wrong way in parts of the skirt. The skirt is draped over her lap and legs, which are spread open slightly, though no skin is shown. She’s wearing pointed orange shoes a few shades darker than her corset.

As a brief aside, if you listened to the episode on Vermeer’s The Milkmaid I described a box on the floor behind the titular character. I thought that the box would contain warm coals to heat the food or room. The same kind of box makes an appearance in this painting. That's what I love about making this show- I'm learning new things.

Her left foot is against the floor and her right one is in a box- this one with no top and only two closed sides. There’s a bowl in it, probably holding warm coals as I thought before. It looks like they were used to warm toes, not food or rooms.

The woman is also wearing an overcoat that looks like velvet, as well. It’s a warm light brown on the outside and a cream on the inside. Her right arm is bare from just below her shoulder down to her wrist, and she’s holding a tall white decanter that looks like ceramic with small pink flower details, probably containing alcohol going by the glass with amber liquid in it in her left hand. Her left arm is bare the same as her right and her hand is holding the glass in such a way that the liquid is tipped towards the side, but has no chance of spilling. It’s half-full.

She has a white cloth napkin spread over her lap. The end near her knees and closer to the viewer is folded under itself, and the end near her stomach is folded over. The folds are shadowed.

There’s a man to our right of the reclining woman, her left. He’s wearing a flat red hat with black feathers, but it’s almost on the side of his head. It’s being held up because his head is drastically tilted the opposite way. It looks like he’s holding some kind of awl or other pointed thin metal tool in one hand and using it to puncture some kind of taut fabric or leather covering on the jug he holds tucked under his other arm. He’s smiling widely. He’s older- he’s bald and has a short white beard and mustache. He’s wearing a black shirt with a high ruffled white collar that reminds me of portraits of monarchs in England. He has brightly colored fabric draped over the arm closer to the viewer, his left. It’s tucked under his belt. It’s striped with mustard yellow, deep orange, and dark brown. It reminds me of Mexican serapes. Maybe the technique or just the fabric made its way from Central America all the way to Holland. The Dutch were prolific traders, they were so close to the water.

His pants are beige, almost a khaki color. They have a vertical band of darker brown on one hip from his belt to his ankle. His socks are dark gray and he has dark brown leather shoes in the same style as the reclining woman, though his are more squared at the toes. The shoes show the sides of the foot, only covering the soles, toes, and heel.

To the left of the image and the right of the reclining woman is a small child standing on an end table that’s carved on the front drawer. The carving is detailed but not terribly ornate- it has swoops and an oval design around the keyhole. There’s a three-armed candle next to the child with a snuffer extending from the metal plate underneath. The child is holding a glass in both hands and has just finished drinking deeply from it- the glass is still to his lips but his head is bowed. Perhaps he partook in alcohol as well.

The child is wearing a white undershirt that looks like a long nightshirt and stops above his knees- the lower half of his legs are bare. He’s wearing cream socks that have been pushed down and brown shoes that are in the same style as the velcro shoes you put on little kids- there’s a smaller gap on the sides but not as drastic as the adults’ shoes.

He’s also wearing a mustard overcoat with white fur at the collar. His hair still has the fineness of childhood. It’s long and dark blonde. Maybe he’s the son of the reclining woman- she has a fond expression on her face as she looks at him. He has a white paper hat on his head that looks somewhat like a chef’s hat. There’s another slightly older child behind him who’s tugging on his overcoat. This child has a basket upside-down on his head and a flushed face, maybe from more alcohol.

This child is wearing a forest green overcoat. He has a light blue fabric draped over his shoulders, like what you do with a sweater if you don’t feel like tying it around your waist. This isn’t tied, though. His legs are bare like the first child’s, and he’s wearing the same kind of socks and shoes.

Behind the child in green is a man in black clothes who has some kind of pointed metal receptacle on his head. It's like a big funnel. He also has a flat piece of leather carrying spoons tied around his waist. He’s holding a large metal serving spoon towards the man next to him, and what looks like a huge metal spatula against his shoulder. For all I know, it’s an instrument. He’s holding it like he’s playing a violin. He must be a fan of kitchen implements that could possibly be instruments. The man to his immediate left is more stern- he has a long metal thing in his mouth, maybe he’s taking a draw from some kind of tobacco or something like that.

The man to his left is also wearing black, with a white bib that extends over his shoulders and a black hat with a wide brim. The next figure looks like a nun- she’s wearing black with the covering over her hair and the white piece separating it from her face. The rest of her outfit is black as well. She has her hand on the stem of the glass the first child is drinking out of- whether she’s giving it to him or trying to take it away is unclear. She has a slightly amused expression on her face.

The next woman must be a server of some kind- she’s holding a black tray of food over her head. It could be waffles or cookies, I can’t tell. She’s smiling. Her arms are pale where they’re exposed by her clothing. She’s wearing a black top with a white dress underneath.

The next man has longer curly hair that’s graying. He's wearing black, as well, with a white collar. I thought it was odd that a few figures are dressed so darkly and the first four so vividly. But this man is turned slightly to talk to the musician on his left. The musician is standing in front of a painting in an ornate gold frame. The painting is a dark landscape, with a slim tree on the left of the image and dark details I can’t make out in the rest, with a sky with an orange glow emanating from the middle.

The musician is playing a fiddle. He’s wearing a brown bowler hat and is talking to the man with graying hair I described before. He’s young- his face still has a boyish look to it and he doesn’t have any facial hair. He’s wearing a deep green coat and a blue-toned shirt underneath with the lapels showing. In front of him is a woman looking to her left. Her arms are folded on the table with her right arm laying over her left. You can see a hint of orange fabric peeking out from under her coat, which is green-toned with white fur down the front, at her collar, and at her wrists. She’s smiling softly.

The man seated on the left of the four seated figures is wearing a blue hat that’s darker on the underside of the flat top. His face is pale and he has a small beard extending solely from his chin. Almost like a long soul patch. Not a great look. His face is blank- maybe he’s bored. No one seems to be talking to him. To the right is a figure you can barely see between the women in front of him. He has slicked black hair that’s covering both sides of his forehead in a curve. He’s wearing black clothes with a white collar, though his is buttoned up. The next man is seen in profile. He’s wearing a black hat and has long curly brown hair that falls just past the front of his shoulders. He has a thin pencil mustache. Also not a great look. His shirt is a green-yellow, more of the latter than the former. He has a wide white collar. And the last figure is a woman with her back to the viewer. This woman is wearing a thick black shawl with white trim over a red-orange dress. She has some kind of necklace on, as well. You can only see the back of the necklace- it’s not a chain, more of a thin leather strap. It has a short orange tassel at the very back of her neck. She’s sitting in a sturdy wooden chair that has been carved to have gently twisting legs and a high back with a gap in the middle that shows the person sitting in its back.

Now that the figures are done, let’s move on to the rest of the painting. The background is what looks like a dark wooden wardrobe behind the last four figures. You can see two posts of it extending upwards, with oval decorations topping them. It’s against a green wall- it’s darker behind the wardrobe, then the corner is further into the painting space and is lighter because of the window. The window has a sheer curtain tied back on the left of it. The window is closed and is separated into four sections of glass- two on the left and two on the right. The glass is broken up by black pieces, like lead in stained glass.

In front of the window is an empty birdcage, or maybe a chandelier for candles. Either way, it’s rounded, open, and metal. It’s dangling by a chain from a wooden beam on the ceiling. On the extreme left of the background is a stone fireplace, maybe. Some of the stone is gray and carved, some of it is brown and polished. Onto the foreground.

The floor is checkered with wide black and white marble tiles. You can see the veins in the material. There’s an empty jug on the left near the children, and two pans. One is a brighter metal than the other. The brighter metal one is also deeper, with a spoon resting in it. The darker one is more of a skillet. On the right of the image are eggshells broken on the floor. There’s a whole egg, too- blue-toned in color. The table in the middle ground is covered with two tablecloths- the top one is white, but the under one is more reminiscent of a carpet. It has orange, brown, and mustard floral designs on it, and it’s stiffer like a carpet, too.

The table holds dessert- plates, a single orange, and a cake on a stand. Last, but certainly not least, is what looks like a spaniel mix standing in front of the table. He’s white with brown markings on him that are smaller near his feet, and his tail is up and alert. He’s standing and looking off into the distance to the right of the painting.

Now for my thoughts.

The skin, the fabric, it all looks like you can see what it would feel like just by looking at it. Like the velvet of the reclining woman’s dress. There’s also smooth metal, soft paper, and wiry fur.

It seems like a fun party, with alcohol flowing for both the adults and the children. Other than the four people on the right, but maybe they’re just taking a short break from the revelry. There are also a few people with non-hats on their heads. Which just reminds me of those stereotypical college frat parties where someone ends up with a lampshade on their head. Drunk people, man. The same throughout history.

I also love the way Steen captured the liveliness of this celebration. Music is playing, people are laughing, and all around a good time is being had. That’s what makes this piece so interesting- the joy the subjects are experiencing. I can’t help but smile when I see this piece. It looks like a gathering of loved ones that truly enjoy each other’s company.

People have always had fun, and it’s great to see that depicted in art. Lots of people think that the past was so much harder than it is today, which it probably was. But there were times where they were just as happy as we are. Life wasn’t misery after misery, they had celebrations as well. And just as happiness brings people together today, it did the same back then. And seeing a piece of art like this, it just reminds me of that. Looking at this piece of art is like looking in a window that can see into the past, showing the viewer a glimpse of what life was like. And life is fun.

Because that’s what it boils down to- fun. Sure- sometimes you can have bad days, even bad weeks. But there’s always something to look forward to, some small kernel of future or even past joy that you can use to keep yourself going.

Here’s my challenge for you- find one thing to be happy about today. It can be a memory, it can be a quiet moment at the park where you see a dog chase its own tail, fully believing that this time he’ll get it. If you do that, you might realize something- big joy and small joy is the same. You can land a multi-million dollar job or have a great day in another country, or you could have a cool drink on a hot day or spend some time with a friend. Joy is joy.

If you liked this episode of Long Live Bat Art, please consider telling a friend and reviewing to help the podcast grow. A link to the transcript of this episode is available in the show notes below. And you can follow me on Twitter at Long Live Bat Art. That’s Long Live B-A-T Art. Thank you for listening to this episode, and I will see you in two weeks.

#episode transcripts

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musclesandhammering · 2 years ago

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Harry Styles never said multiple times or ANY time that he’s straight. Do you genuinely think he did or did you just make that up? Only “being seen” with women doesn’t mean he can’t also be into men. Celebrities don’t stop existing when we don’t see them. Harry has an entire song where he says he’s into both men and women. AND he doesn’t get praised for the way he dresses, quite the opposite actually. Also that person was right real people cannot queer bait

Ok so this is part 4 of a divided up ask so I’m adding the rest of it for context.

Part 1:

Part 2:

Part 3:

So the fact that you chose to go on anon and then get an attitude by saying “so your argument doesn’t even mAke SeNSe” makes me think a tiny bit that you’re a Harry fan who got heated at me mentioning him rather than just someone wanting to engage in a discussion about my main point…… But since you’re a queer man and I’m not and I genuinely value your perspective on it and was genuinely asking for feedback, I’m gonna pretend I didn’t see the snark lol.

The whole point of my post has very very little to do with Harry (that’s why I only mentioned him in the tags). This is a phenomenon I’ve been irritated about for awhile and the tweet that sparked the discussion just happened to have Harry as the “straight” example in question. The tiny part that does have to do with Harry has to do with his privilege, not necessarily his sexuality. Well maybe a little about his sexuality.

So, first of all, as a disclaimer (and a correction, cause I’m nothing if not honest), I don’t follow Harry Styles at all. I barely know anything about him, and if I’m being honest I don’t like him lol. This isn’t me trying to cancel him or anything, it’s purely an opinion. To me, he’s annoying and overrated and for the life of me I don’t know how he gets magazine covers and shit calling him the “king of pop” or whatever when he’s literally only had like 2 really successful songs lmao. So anyway, I went back and looked it up and it’s true he’s never explicitly said he’s straight- I saw other people mentioning that on The Bird App and just thought “yeah that tracks” which was irresponsible of me- so I was 100% wrong about that. Either way, that was very much not the point of my original post.

There’s no need to be pressed about the Harry part, though, cause if you look closely you’ll notice I never said he did anything wrong. I said people’s attitudes around him and the topic were problematic. Being a celebrity is pretty shitty cause you’re held to a higher standard of scrutiny than anyone else, and my honest opinion of Harry as a person is that they (and everyone else) should be able to do whatever they want and dress however they want and talk about (or not talk about) their sexuality in whatever terms they feel like. But being a celebrity does make it more complicated in terms of the reactions that other people inevitably have about how you express yourself. So when he chooses not to publicly identify himself as queer (because he hasn’t. He’s said he doesn’t want to be labeled and that he doesn’t really think about his sexuality, but he also has consistently refused to acknowledge that he’s not straight either. Which is valid. Maybe he’s questioning or maybe he just doesn’t identify as anything. Both fine. But my point is, right now he’s operating on a Schrödinger’s sexuality. He doesn’t object to being called straight and he refuses to call himself queer.), he’s choosing not to be included in discourse that is specific to the queer community. You can’t have it both ways.

A few months ago he opined about how gay male sex in movies is too sexy and should be more tender and less about physicality- which, ok, yeah that’s definitely an argument that can be made…. But it’s an argument that should be made by a queer man. This isn’t some generic #gayrights debate, this is very much an in-community issue. Topics like that should not be discussed by people not in our community and so far, he’s refused to acknowledge himself as part of the community. It’s the same as how I will fervently defend gay celebrities’ rights to stay in the closet peacefully, but if you choose to be closeted, you can’t respectfully go out and argue about how gay men have a responsibility to be on PrEP. Because that’s a discussion for a gay man, and if you don’t want to say you’re gay- that fine!- but you can’t be included in the conversation. At least not in a public forum.

So even if he’s not outright queerbaiting (I agree that he’s not, because it’s not intentionally malicious on his part), he does have a few problematic moments when it comes to the queer stuff lol.

*Just as an aside- you are 100% wrong that real people cannot queerbait. It’s true that being ambiguous or anti-label in regards to your sexuality by itself is not queerbaiting. But it’s definitely possible to do that in a very intentionally misleading way. If someone knows they’re straight but plays it coy with the labels and plays up their queer-coding specifically to get more lgbt fans, that is real life queerbait. I feel like you’re probably gonna give me some pushback about this one because (no offense) queer men tend to think they’re the center of the world when it comes to our community, but I don’t really care because being a queer woman, unlike the rest of this discussion, my opinion on this bit is just as valid as yours.

There is one part of your argument I strongly agree with, though. We should be working toward an atmosphere where anyone can dress anyway they want. That would be the most beneficial to queer people. And having straight men do that is a good thing. You’re right, we shouldn’t be tearing them down, but instead lifting queer gnc guys up. The problem is that society as a whole is making great progress on the not tearing straight gnc guys down part, but not such great progress on the lifting queer gnc guys up part. And a lot of queer people (including me) are understandably annoyed as hell about it.

Lots of gay men have been dressing in what society considers a feminine way literally forever and, for the most part, they’re still just as shit on for it today as they always have been. But just in the last ten years, for straight guys, it’s gotten to the point where a cute young white boy puts on a skirt and he gets YAS QUEEN’D out of the building mostly by straight women who think they’re being progressive. Yes, I know, there’s still a lot of jackasses who give them crap for it, but not nearly as much as gay guys get. And even if they got as much crap as gay guys, it wouldn’t effect them the same way because straight men have more societal power than gay men- they have the metaphorical resources to stand up to the bullies. Gay guys don’t have that backing. So yes, people should be able to wear what they want regardless of identity, but when queer folks have been doing it and suffering for it for years, and all of a sudden straight folks start doing it and get praised…… you can understand how some of us would be a little bitter about it.

And if we’re being honest here, I think the privilege aspect annoys me more than anything where Harry is concerned. He’s not just a gnc non-queer guy. He’s an extremely rich, stereotypically good looking, young, white, non-queer gnc guy. And none of those things are his fault. But he was always gonna be elevated higher than just about every other gnc person, and (like all privilege) it’s not something that’s been earned. He gets magazine covers and gushy articles and all this fawning media coverage and a ginormous fanbase of straight women drooling over him and heralding him as some progressive hero…. You very very rarely see a loudly openly decidedly queer gnc person get all that. Very rare for a gnc poc to get all that. I guarantee you’re not gonna see an older gnc person or a not-traditionally-attractive gnc person, or heaven forbid a non-celebrity gnc person get all of that. And it’s just discouraging and it really does make me bitter, you know? And none of this is Harry’s fault, again, but you can’t argue that the media has designated him as the chosen gnc fashion icon, and I’m just saying that if that had to be a thing, there’s about a thousand other people I wish it would’ve gone to rather than him. :/

You didn’t really say anything about this, but the topic of my original post was actually supposed to be about how straight women think they have so much discussion power on lgbt topics and it’s really fucking annoying. On the Twitter thread that sparked all of this, I (a queer woman) was arguing with a straight woman. She was a Harry Styles fangirl and completely ignored everything I was saying in favour of defending her idol, as if she has any authority on the topic. *eye roll* And it wasn’t just me, there were a hundred other queer people (lots of them men) saying the same thing. But of course straight ladies don’t care. They never care. It’s always them. *sigh*

TLDR- The fact that he dresses gnc isn’t a problem at all, but the fact that people try to make him specifically into some kind of hero for it absolutely is.

All of this being said, I really do value anon’s input. Everything I just wrote is my opinion based on my experience, and it’s clear that the anon has a different one and that’s alright. Nothing but respect and absolutely no hate. Sorry if any of this seemed snippy or off-coloured. And if any other queer folks wanna give their opinion, please do! :)

#queer topics #queer discourse #gnc #gnc fashion #homophobia #lgbt #queer #lgbt issues #anon #ask #answered

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rosesforyourproses · 4 months ago

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@goryachiychai

The questions you asked are very much valid and everything you did say is observable in the manga. I actually do think that Kishi did not intentionally wrote his female characters in sexist nor misogynistic roles because it shows how much he cared for his female characters by actually taking the time to write them in a way that women or girls would relate them. Women in Japan liked to be in love and they were oftentimes shy due to their culture.

People sometimes forget to consider that yes, there will be instances that women are written or represented that one can call it sexist or misogynistic because people forget that Kishi comes and lives in a country where their views in women haven’t change much and they still follow norms that would make the 21st century woke person hyperventilate and scream, “misogynist! misogynist! sexist fucker!”

The women in the manga while there are those who stray from usual conventional roles, they reflect japanese society at that time. Women mostly wish to fall in love (shoujo), start a family, become mothers, and (this is what I always hate about these fucking feminist) but asian culture takes so much pride in motherhood, they do not see it as weak nor pitiful, they find a mother’s love to her children and family to be the most enduring, beautiful, sacrificial and powerful love. Mothers are not downgraded in Japan nor Asia in general. They are highly praised and respected. And this disparity of beliefs is why we have so much debates about women representation in manga written in the early 2000’s. I’m not saying that (wherever you come from) that your culture don’t value mothers and I’m sure there’s a lot of Asians out there who would have the opposite opinion but there’s a clear distinction on how much importance are given in such roles and not to mention, the influence of modern feminism has change the outlooks of many in wanting to be a mother or wife and I won’t necessarily find that a bad thing but it’s downright comical, ludicrous even, to perpetuate that women are weak simply because they are wives or mothers because you sound like a certain system and species of humanity that cause women to revolt in the first place, want a hint? It’s called MEN AND PATRIARCHY.

Anyway, I don’t think it’s bad to acknowledge that there have been some sexism in Naruto albeit, not entirely since we do see that Kishi does put women in high positions and make them powerful and at the same time, not make them lose their femininity, which just means that women can attain those roles it’s just rare or not common for them because in the first place, society doesn’t expect them to take on those roles in the first place. So, I don’t think that at that time Kishi even knows that he was being sexist or misogynistic because what he draw was simply the things he observed in his surroundings and culture and what he thought was “normal” and he probably didn’t see anything wrong. Now we can see that in Boruto, more of the women are in high positions, they work and at the same time manage the family, and have vital roles in the village and in the story.

All in all, there is a disparity in how men and women are represented in the manga and it’s not wrong for us to acknowledge those nor does it make the manga and the female characters any less interesting or powerful, if your read any classical book or any piece of media written between the 90’s to the early 2000’s you’re not gonna find a woman that isn’t in some way or another, not in a sexist role. Being understanding of these authors and how they are a product of their environment and culture does not make us tolerant, I’m not saying that it’s okay and we should give it a pass but to simply be understandable of it especially when writing an analysis and criticism about a story or manga because a piece of media is heavily influenced by the reality of that time when it’s written.

P.s, I also do agree on the argument that the manga is mainly geared to boys and likely that’s also one of the factors why the manga heavily emphasized the men. When making a product you really have to consider your target audience.

Sometimes I don't understand these people

How is a woman supporting a man, sexist? What is wrong with being supportive? That's not called sexism that's traditionalism, these people force their own views on others and it's infuriating sometimes.

Didn't Naruto say he likes Hinata?

Didn't Sasuke thank Sakura ?

Wasn't Shikamaru greatful when Temari came to his aid, didn't you see the fondness in his face

Most of the complaints there are untrue.

Wtf do they want Mikoto to do? Play ninja while her sons are infants. They want her to be a bad mother. What just to chase a career of death.

And no Sakura isn't a bad mom, she prioritizes Sarada over her work. We see her spend more time with Sadara and being a good mom.

I don't understand it,do they want a man in a woman's body? Sakura Hinata Kushina and Mikoto chose family over work because they are good women. They are selfless and love their families. And that Hinata is basically a pacifist.

Heck Tsunade who I reckon as the best of them all is still devoted to her love and family (Dan and Nawaki). After all she became Hokage for them if I remember correctly.

Btw is Mikoto even a Jonin?! I remember Sasuke saying fucking toddler Itachi is better than her in shuriken jutsu.

Kaguya is the origins behind chakra but it's Zetsu that causes all the problems. It was he who planned her resurrection and it was he who brainwashed the Uchiha.

Most of the story men were villains so when a woman is finally the villain it's suddenly sexist?

I don't get the sexism in here tbh

"Sexism" is another one of those annoying buzzwords that people just love to carelessly throw around and grossly misuse in this fandom, right up there with "misogyny", "homophobic" and "fangirl". Everything that person said is complete and utter unadulterated nonsense, everything. I was actually left dumbfounded by the sheer level of absurdity emanating from what I just read. I thought I had read it all in the Naruto fandom but fucking hell, there are literally no bounds to the amount of drivel people can spew in this fandom.

So apparently, every single female character was defined by her relationships to men, and most of them were also boy-crazy. I'm not gonna bother listing a plethora of female characters proving this statement to be idiotic, but it also shows how much of the female cast's characters this person is ignoring by claiming how all of them are defined by their relationships to men.

People love to say how someone like Sakura was "obsessed with Sasuke", despite the fact that by their logic, Naruto was even more obsessed with Sasuke. But then they'll try and counter by highlighting his other relationships with Jiraiya, Iruka etc. As if Sakura didn't have her own other relationships with Tsunade, Ino, Hinata etc. They think someone like Ino is "boy-crazy", as if she didn't have very prominent and platonic relationships with Shikamaru, Choji, Asuma and her father. The relationships she had with them were far more prominent and important than her romantic relationships, but this person will of course ignore all of that and insinuate that Ino was boy-crazy, as if the romantic relationships were all her character amounted to.

Apparently, Shikamaru not being shown to marry Temari during his Infinite Tsukuyomi dream is evidence that he actively dislikes her. God only knows how they reached that conclusion.

Sai ultimately didn't find Ino ugly, as evidenced by Shikamaru Hiden's conclusion.

The amount of times Naruto has praised and held Hinata in high regard... The blood promise during the Chuunin Exams, the "Proud Failure" speech, him reassuring her during the skirmish with the White Zetsus, the hand holding scene, the entirety of The Last...

Sasuke called Sakura annoying at the very beginning, but she became one of his most precious comrades, as he himself stated.

This person literally picks and chooses where the story just ends for certain characters because they just ignore all of the later developments for these characters and their relationships.

Another stupid generalisation, acting as if all men who showed some measure of interest in women were just like Jiraiya or Ebisu.

Not every scene depicting Naruto's crush on Sakura showed goofy immaturity and innocence, and his growing feelings for Hinata certainly didn't demonstrate that.

Lee's crush on Sakura wasn't dropped entirely, they were brought up again during his Infinite Tsukuyomi dream.

So because Obito retained his feelings for Rin into adulthood, it means he was still the same childish boy? So by this person's logic, you can only truly grow up once you've moved on from the romantic feelings you had as a child? That's the same ridiculous argument I hear about Sakura - she developed in so many different ways as a person, but because she held on to her feelings for Sasuke, all of her development doesn't matter and her character regressed according to these people. It's pathetic.

"Women were almost always healers and support", despite the fact that 57% of all the Medic-Nins shown in the series were male, yeah I did my research on that one.

"Women make up less than 1/3 of ninjas even at Genin level", no. The ratio is definitely in favour of the male characters, but it's not that large. But that's to be expected, it's a battle shounen catered to young boys, so of course there will be more male characters. The vast majority of battle shounens have noticeably more male characters - Bleach, One Piece, Dragon Ball, My Hero Academia, Demon Slayer and Jujutsu Kaisen just to name a few.

"Girls are almost all desperate to become wives and earn the attention of boys who don't even like them!", more blanket statements, more gross generalisations based on the early chapters of one or two characters, and more misinformation regarding boys who apparently didn't like them.

Who the hell ever said or even remotely implied that Fugaku "married into the main family"?

To answer your question about Mikoto though, she was indeed a Jonin, but Itachi being better than her at something ninja related as a toddler isn't surprising, he was a literal prodigy.

Minato was the Hokage because he earned that title due to his unprecedented skills and accomplishments during the Third Shinobi War. Just because Kushina was "borderline royalty" and from a prestigious clan doesn't mean that she had more of a right to be the Hokage. Was she more competent as a leader than Minato was? Did she have the same level of respect in the village that Minato did? Was she more capable of defending the village than Minato was? No. If she had done what Minato had done during the War, and she wasn't Kurama's Jinchuuriki, then perhaps Hiruzen would have chosen her as his successor instead. There was no sexism in the choice of Hokage for fuck's sake.

How the hell can this person exaggerate Kushina's status by claiming that she was "borderline royalty", while simultaneously severely downplaying Minato's prestige by ignoring everything he had done to earn the Hokage title, and not see the glaring double standard? They're complaining about how Kushina's credentials were apparently ignored, while they themselves were ignoring Minato's.

Wow, the reach here is insane. This person really just wants to feel victimised from non existent sexism. The vast majority of the "sins" committed in the series were done by men, but we'll just ignore that I guess, like they chose to ignore so many other things proving their claims to be preposterous.

Kishi has no idea the sexism is there because it's not fucking there. However, nowhere did he claim that the women have "epic girl power", and at least with regards to Sakura, he openly acknowledged the errors that he made when writing her as the heroine. I won't dignify this person's further bullshit about the men apparently hating their wives, their loveless marriages, men being forced to marry women they don't like and Kishi apparently blaming women for this. It's just a bunch of baseless bullshit, like everything else they said.

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bleachification · 2 years ago

Text

a platonic paradox

pairing: grimmjow x reader

warnings: swearing lol thats it

summary: He loves me... he loves me not… he loves me... he... is an emotionally constipated Arrancar with less than desirable social skills and a pension for jealousy. What could possibly go wrong?

One… two… three… four… five shots later, and reality finally starts to blur at the edges. Fuzzier and fuzzier, the strobe lights turn as they cut across blackened space, glowing in feverish haste.

Maybe drinking on an empty stomach isn’t the greatest of your ideas, but no one’s coined you as a genius thus far, and you certainly never claimed to be one. Plus, you have a valid reason for knocking back a row of tequila: men. Or, more specifically, one man who goes by the name Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez—the bane of your existence and one of your closest friends. However, friend is a term you use very loosely after the earlier fight.

The mere thought of him incites another scowl from you… and a sixth shot that slides down your throat like oil in a car—smooth and familiar.

You feel a tap on your shoulder and turn to face the person on your left—a head of ginger pops into view, only to be pushed aside by a tiny girl with an irritated yet concerned expression pasted onto her delicate features. Inoue only smiles as Rukia takes her spot next to you and inspects the row of shot glasses on the booth table in front of you.

“You need to stop,” Rukia demands.

You barely register her words over the thumping bass of the speakers. The club is a swarm of warm bodies, alcohol, pulsing lights, and wall-shaking music. Through the haze and humidity, you make out the DJ standing at the south end of the venue, directly opposite your booth.

“You worry too much.” You wave your hand, dismissing Rukia.

She tries prying the drink you just ordered from your hands but fails miserably.

“For good reason! We’re going to have to carry you home at this rate.”

Orihime pats Rukia on the shoulder in a calming manner. It doesn’t quite work, but she tries anyway. Ever the pacifist.

“I think Rukia’s trying to say that we’re worried about you. What exactly happened?”

Ichigo appears from the crowd and slides in next to his fiancé, beer in hand. “Yeah, what’s going on? You called us out without explanation and started drinking like you were on a personal mission to destroy your liver.”

“I can handle my liquor.” You roll your eyes at your friends’ questioning looks.

“Y/N,” Orihime presses.

You groan. “Fine! Fine.”

They all wait expectantly as you down another drink. Every shot turns the world one degree mistier.

“Grimmjow and I got into a fight,” you grit out. The words taste like gravel on your tongue.

The three of them exchange a look.

You frown. “What?”

“It’s just… isn’t that pretty common?” Ichigo asks.

“No. We argue, sure, but today he… went too far. He was being an asshole—more so than usual. You’d think he’d be nicer to the person who acclimated him to human society. Stupid overgrown cat,” you huff.

“What did he say?” Ichigo takes a swig of his beer.

You pause. The whole argument that led to this moment was dumb. So dumb that you can’t even remember what instigated it. All you recall is the hurt washing over you at the end—a vile, sickening sensation that festered like rot in your chest because of the words Grimmjow bit out right before you walked out the door: You’re nothing special.

In hindsight, what he said wasn’t even that awful. Yet it shredded you the moment it left his lips. Perhaps you took it so hard because you thought you were special to him—in the same way he is to you. The irritating reality is Grimmjow has grown to become one of your closest confidantes. Your best friend. To be cast aside like that… to mean nothing of importance to him… is a harsh and gutting revelation—one that sets fire to your throat and incinerates whatever affection you had left for him to absolute ash.

“Nothing of importance,” you mutter.

The others don’t pry any further, sensing you no longer want to talk about it. They’d be right; you don’t want to talk about it… you don’t even want to think about it, especially since the earlier alcohol-induced buzz has now morphed into full-on drunk goggles.

“I’m gonna go dance.” You’re already halfway across the dance floor before Rukia scrambles to catch up with you.

Orihime slides her attention over to her fiancé. “Uh. Kurosaki?”

Ichigo dials a number into his phone and brings it to his ear. “Already on it.”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

It is 1:58 am, and Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez has never been more miserable in his entire life. Not when he was a mindless hollow, not even when he lost to Ichigo—that orange-haired freak of nature.

No. The almighty former Espada has been reduced to a mopey mess by a mere human. And an annoying one at that.

It’s been almost five hours since Grimmjow last heard from you. Four of them he’s spent trying to convince himself you’d come back soon like you always do—with that gentle smile on your face that he’s grown disgustingly accustomed to.

Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock.

Grimmjow clenches the phone in his hand and his arm jerks—almost chucking the device at the insufferable clock ticking in the corner. It is a constant reminder that you haven’t returned to him. He only stops himself from throwing the phone once he remembers how much the hunk of metal had cost him.

Stupid human inventions.

If it weren’t for the need to constantly message and call you about, well… anything really, Grimmjow would never have spent a cent on the damned thing.

The phone clatters onto the coffee table as Grimmjow resumes his prior (pitiful) position on the couch: flat on his stomach, face down, and legs draped over the edge.

Grimmjow frowns—pouts—into the cushions. Twenty minutes pass. Then thirty. Finally, a vibration cuts through the air.

Someone’s calling him.

Grimmjow jerks up and unceremoniously falls off the couch in haste to check the notification. His high hopes are immediately dashed when a familiar contact name comes into view: Prick. His shoulders slump, and he lets it ring a couple of times before lazily thumbing the screen to answer the call.

“The hell do you want?”

“Are you busy?” Ichigo’s voice is barely perceptible amidst the deafening music blaring through the phone’s speakers.

Grimmjow grimaces, pulling his ear away from the phone, then glances at the coffee table in front of him. A half-melted tub of chocolate ice cream stares back, a mocking reminder of his dramatics grief. Just above the sugary mess sits a large-screen TV—one currently playing a series of films that fit perfectly under the “romantic comedy” genre.

Grimmjow turns around and faces away from the scene. Out of sight, out of mind.

“Who do you think I am? Of course, I’m fucking busy.”

“Right… guess I’ll get Y/N home by mys—“

With keys in hand, Grimmjow is already headed out the door when he gruffly cuts Ichigo off. “Address. Now.”

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Tall, dark, and handsome wraps an arm around your waist as you sway to the suggestive beat.

Rukia’s long gone. You lost sight of her when the crowd drew you further into the dance floor. You don’t particularly care where the shinigami went—probably back to the booth—as the alcoholic haze clouding your mind bars you from focusing on anything but the gorgeous man next to you. He leans in, clearly interested in something other than dancing, but still asks: “Would you like to dance?”

You study his features. Short black hair sweeps over honey-brown eyes that are shadowed by long lashes. He smirks, showing off a dimple on his left cheek. He’s a looker, for sure.

Not bad at all, but nowhere near Grimmjow.

The thought jolts you. Grimmjow has nothing to do with the person beside you. So why is it that every passing second serves as a reminder of him?

You shake those useless thoughts away and plaster a lazy smile on your face. You pull the stranger towards you and wrap your arms around his neck as you move to the beat. He presses up against you, forehead on yours. His lips are millimetres from yours, and his lidded gaze glitters with desire. You welcome it.

For once, you’re lost to the dizzying heat and drunken thrills of the night, and you’re ready to get lost in the arms of a stranger—someone who, hopefully, will distract you from the man plaguing every dark corner of your mind.

A tilt of the chin brings you closer to him. He leans in, and you close your eyes, ready for a welcome distraction. But before your lips can meet, the man across from you is harshly yanked back, and a flurry of familiar voices bombards you from all directions.

You blink twice, trying to take in the scene before you.

Firstly, Grimmjow is here. He’s clutching so tightly onto your poor dance partner’s shoulder that it’s a miracle his collarbone hasn’t shattered. The guy looks terrified… and for a good reason. Grimmjow is pissed. Hell, even that would be an understatement. An air of rage so heavy you almost mistake it for spiritual pressure ripples off him in waves. His normally cavalier expression is distorted. Gone are his usual smirks or annoyed scowls. In their place sits a mask of absolute crazed, seething fury. If looks could kill, this whole club would be home to a mountain of corpses by now.

Secondly, the shouts you hear originate from Ichigo and the two girls; all three are trying to push through the crowd to make it to you and the blue-haired psychopath before you. Thanks to the dark atmosphere, overbearing music, and the fact you’re all in an isolated corner of the club, no one else seems to notice the complete disaster unfolding before your eyes.

Ichigo breaks through the sea of people and immediately hooks his arms under Grimmjow’s. It takes almost all his strength to drag the Arrancar back a metre or two.

Ichigo struggles to keep Grimmjow at bay. “What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“I’ll kill you after I get my hands on him. Fucking let go!” Grimmjow pulls free from Ichigo’s grasp and steps toward the other man.

That split second snaps you to attention, and you run to block him. In less than a second, you’re in front of the other guy and facing a murderous Grimmjow; arms spread out in a protective stance. You wobble a bit and curse yourself for getting this inebriated.

Grimmjow freezes. The look in his eyes—a strange mixture of annoyance, hurt, and unfathomable anger—makes you uneasy.

“What, pray tell, are you doing?” You mentally high-five yourself for not slurring your words. It isn’t easy in your current state.

Grimmjow scoffs. “You’re actually protecting this guy?”

Said guy peeps up with: “Look, I’m sorry. Didn’t realize you had a partner.”

You turn to him and scrunch your nose. “I am not his partner.”

Grimmjow makes a snarling sound behind you.

You whip back towards him. “And you. Are you insane?! Why the hell would you do that?”

Grimmjow shifts closer. You have to tilt your head up to glare at him. His breath fans your face as he answers.

“He put his hands on you. You think I’m just gonna let that shit slide?” He’s speaking low. Rough. Dangerous.

You open your mouth to retort, only to find yourself dangling upside down from Grimmjow’s shoulder. He just hauled you up like a sack of flour.

This bastard.

As if on instinct, you immediately start wiggling in his grasp and thumping on his back, yelling at him to put you down. The struggling only drives him to tighten his hold on you as he marches the two of you out the club doors.

“Keep doing that, and I’ll drop you.”

Bastard move.

“Put me down!” You let out a yell in irritation. Grimmjow pretends not to hear you.

From your peripheral vision, you catch sight of Rukia, followed by the other two, scrambling to catch up. Orihime apologizes profusely to the bouncer at the door for the commotion caused by the man carrying you.

“Ichigo, help!”

Ichigo only shakes his head in disappointment as Grimmjow increases his pace.

Traitor.

Maybe it’s the liquid courage. Or perhaps it’s because you’ve finally lost it, but you raise a hand and land a hard smack on Grimmjow’s ass.

He stiffens. “What the f-“

“I’ll do it again if you don’t put me down this instant, you goddamn psychopath,” you warn.

Instead of complying, he shifts you until you’re being carried in his arms bridal-style. He just cut off your accessibility to his ass. Although you can’t ponder that disappointment for too long, the realization of what he’s about to do dawns on you when he takes a slow step backward.

“Grimmjow, don’t you dare-“Your own shriek cuts you off as he rips through the air and propels you toward the sky. You can only tighten your hold on his neck and bury your face in his shoulder as biting winds whip around you at the speed of light. Despite the cool night air, Grimmjow is warm to the touch. In less than five seconds, you’re staring at the front door of his apartment.

The son of a bitch just sonido-ed you across the city.

Grimmjow finally puts you down as he fishes the keys from his pocket. The whole time he hasn’t said a single word to you.

“Why are we here?” You reluctantly follow him into the familiar unit.

He has his back turned to you. Broad shoulders hunch over as he removes his shoes. Three seconds later, he flops onto the couch while running a hand down his face, quietly letting out a sigh of exhaustion and a hint of something else.

You sit in the spot next to him and pull your legs up. You shift until you’re facing him and only inches away.

You poke him in the stomach. It’s a habit you have that Grimmjow complains about constantly, but he never actually takes any action to stop it.

“Hey. Answers. Now,” you interrogate.

He lazily peeks at you; head still lolled back on the back of the couch. Grimmjow moves and his shifting weight causes you to dip forward. Typically, you’d be able to straighten yourself up. However, drunk you has precisely zero sense of balance, so you topple right into Grimmjow’s lap.

Grimmjow almost jumps out of his skin at the unexpected contact. You feel your cheeks flame up in embarrassment as you try to push yourself back up, only to lose your balance again and fall back against him. Your face presses up against his stomach, and the heat clouds all your senses. You feel even drunker than before.

“For fucks sake.” Tired of your struggling, Grimmjow pulls you up until you’re sat in his lap and face-to-face with him. You try to ignore the fact that you’re basically straddling him. You really try to ignore his hands resting on the side of your thighs. The contact causes something within you to flare up—an unsettling feeling you push away to the furthest corner of your mind.

“Well, this is nice. We’ve reached a new level of friendship now,” you snort. Thankfully, your stable tone doesn’t betray your wavering nerves.

Grimmjow’s jaw tenses. “Right. Friendship.”

You almost reel back. He spits that last part out like it is laced with poison. A sting of disappointment shoots through you, and you move to get off him. Right now, you want to be as far away from him as possible in fear of Grimmjow seeing the tears that have begun to prick the back of your eyes.

If he hates being your friend that badly, then there’s no way he’d ever reciprocate…

“Hey. You crying?”

To your surprise, Grimmjow grabs you by the hips and pulls you back, caging his huge arms around you to prevent you from escaping. His eyebrows furrow as he leans in to examine your face. You muster up every ounce of willpower to suck the tears back into the confines of your eyelids.

“You look like a bug,” Grimmjow murmurs.

You pinch his cheek with a scowl, mind briefly wiped of your previous grievances.

“Bastard.”

He doesn’t even flinch. “You stopped crying.”

“I never started,” you retort.

He makes a noncommittal noise.

“What?”

He grunts, eyes still fixated on your own. “Trying to figure out why you ran away.”

You gape at him. He has to be kidding. Right?

“Okay, first of all, I did not run away; I left because you pissed me off. Second of all, are you serious?

Your exasperation only fuels his confusion. Grimmjow’s face scrunches, and he tilts his head only slightly, but enough to emphasize how baffled he is by this whole situation.

You falter. This whole night you have agonized over his words, never once considering that he may not find fault in what he said. Maybe he never intended to hurt you and only meant to state a fact: that you simply don’t mean anything special to him.

Do you occupy such a minuscule part of his heart? Given that he takes up all the space you have to offer in yours, it is an unnecessarily cruel twist of fate.

You steel yourself. Grimmjow is your friend. Nothing less… and certainly nothing more. He has drawn that line very clearly—in bright, irreversible red.

“Forget it. It’s nothing,” you murmur.

He shoots you a look; he doesn’t believe you. “Oi. Don’t lie to me.”

“I’m not lying,” you insist.

His eyes narrow, and he slowly drawls your name. Irritation coats the word like honey as he presses you for a different answer.

With a shake of your head, you cement your refusal to budge. Nothing good could come from that conversation, and you would rather suffer in silence than lose Grimmjow as a friend—which is the only outcome you can fathom.

“I… it doesn’t matter. Not like you’d care.” The last part is practically inaudible to the human ear. Unfortunately for you, Grimmjow’s senses are anything but human.

He stiffens, looking like he’d just been slapped hard. “What the fuck are you on about? Who told you that? I’ll kill ‘em.”

“No one told me Grimmjow… no one other than you, at least. It’s obvious you don’t care to be friends anymore,” you scoff and look away, too anxious to meet his eyes.

Every single muscle of Grimmjow’s goes rigid. You sneak a glance at him and pause at the storm brewing in his gaze. Tides of emotions threaten to overwhelm one another, but at the forefront of the tumultuous battle flashes an intensity you are very familiar with: desperation.

Grimmjow tips his chin down, lessening the gap between your faces… and lips. What comes out of his mouth next scarcely breaks above a whisper, but the words themselves bear a threatening weight.

“Obvious to who? Because last time I checked, you’re the only human I ever speak to willingly, the only person whose touch I don’t find repulsive, and the only one who can mouth off to me in my own damn house and not die for it. So tell me, Y/N, who is that obvious to? Because it sure as hell ain’t me,” he snarls.

You blink. That sobers you up. Any and all words dying in your throat as you take in everything. You only manage to find your voice again after a minute of deliberation.

“Then why did you say that I wasn’t special? You’re giving me mixed signals here,” you whisper.

Realization dawns on him like an iron curtain as your response dwindles in the hushed air. He shifts again. This time, switching his grip on your thigh to the curve of your waist. His hands settle firmly, yet gently, on your side, and the warmth resonates through your bloodstream, making it increasingly difficult to focus on the present situation. You try anyway.

“Is that why you ran away?”

You roll your eyes. “I didn't run.”

He shrugs. “My bad. Is that why you abandoned me?”

For a split second, Grimmjow’s sulking reminds you of a kicked puppy. A crass, six-foot-one puppy with blue fur and murderous tendencies. Your fingers twitch with an almost overwhelming desire to run them through his hair. You settle for flicking him in the forehead instead.

“Don’t be so dramatic. You’re acting like I fled the country rather than go to a club ten minutes away.” You absently brush a stray strand of his hair aside, not thinking much of it. Grimmjow, however, sucks in a sharp breath and you pause as a glint of something flits across his gaze… something intimate.

A trick of the light, surely.

“You–” Speech morphs to muffled protests as you press a hand to Grimmjow’s mouth, effectively cutting off whatever he was going to say.

“You still owe me some answers,” you remark.

“Mmm… to what?” He’s getting sleepier; the lull in his voice is a clear indication. Warmth blooms across your skin as Grimmjow droops forward and nestles his head into the crook of your shoulder, leaning into you as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.

“How about why you ruined my perfectly good night out?” You feel his head turn, breath hot like coals against your neck. A chill shoots down your spine at the slight contact, and you ignore the tingling sensation in your stomach that feels an awful lot like butterflies—millions and millions of them.

He scowls. “What, you’re that upset over not seeing lover boy again?” His arms tighten around you, “You could’ve had a better night with me. Here. Like this.”

You draw in a sharp breath as his forehead meets yours. Space is a minuscule concept now as his face hovers mere centimetres from yours. Your mind swims with a torrent of mixed feelings and thoughts.

“Grimmjow…”

“I’m sorry.”

You blink. “Huh?”

“For what I said. I didn’t mean it—any of it. Swear on my life.” His voice is strained, as if not used to the taste of those words on his tongue.

You want to believe him, truly. But the emotional, irrational side of you forsakes that possibility.

You’re nothing special.

The knife in your heart, previously forgotten, now twists again as you recall his words. For a brief second, you wonder if it would be better to feel nothing at all. To bear an empty chest, much like the hollow hole carved into the Arrancars. Perhaps that’s what you need—to lose your heart and live as they do, void of all sensations that make up human nature.

“It’s fine, Grimmjow. You don’t… experience things like I do. It’s not your fault I got upset over such a trivial matter,” you sigh.

He pulls back, something akin to guilt and shock shuttering across his handsome face. “So I did hurt you.”

You swallow, unsure how to face this new vulnerability of his.

“Tell me how to fix this. How to fix us,” he pleads.

“There is no us,” you say. The distance between you and Grimmjow is practically nonexistent, yet you find yourself unable to face him.

“Bullshit,” he spits.

You shake your head, a migraine already forming in its center. “I don’t know what you want me to say, Grimmjow. I can never seem to understand what you want!” Your anger rises with each sentence, but you don’t stop and let the emotion fuel you, “I saw us as friends. Best friends. But then you go and act like I’m nothing to you, only to turn around and get all pissy like a fucking cat marking its territory when I dare spend my night with someone who isn’t you. So for the love of god, what do you want from me?!”

“I want you.”

Your head snaps up. “What?”

“Next to me, in my bed in the morning, in my arms. Wherever I am, whenever it is… I want you with me,” he states plainly. Too casual, acting as if he didn’t just drop the biggest bomb on you, wiping every semblance of your anger away with pure, unbridled shock.

You ignore your racing pulse and focus on the intensity of his gaze instead. “You don’t believe in romance. You told me that.”

“I didn’t believe in many things before I met you.” He presses a searing kiss to the inside of your palm before leaning into it, your touch a familiar comfort.

“Like what?”

Heaven. Home. Love, probably.

He grunts. “Secret.”

“That’s not fair,” you tease. The hope rising within you gives way to giddiness and a whole new sensation: relief.

Grimmjow wants you the same way you want him. Perhaps even more so.

“What’s not fair is being iced out for a whole day while waiting for you, only to witness that thing wrapped around you like some fucking parasite.”

“He was not a parasite.”

“Looked like one to me. Ugly. Small. Easy to step on.”

“You called me a bug earlier. Doesn’t that mean we’re meant to be?” You’re torturing him at this point. It's incredibly amusing.

Grimmjow’s eyes darken. Two slits of obsidian that burn with jealousy and something else under the surface. Something even more dangerous.

“Say that again.”

You only laugh. It is a light sound that eases the tension in both the air and Grimmjow’s shoulders. He’s missed your laugh—craves it more than a drowning man would for air.

After a few seconds longer, he inevitably feels his lips pull upwards into a crooked smile—a special kind that appears solely in your presence.

Your giggles falter into a faint smile when you notice Grimmjow smirking at you. He absently draws circles on your hip with his fingers, lazily tracing the curve of your back as you ask: “What exactly are we?”

“Dunno,” he half-mumbles, too preoccupied with snuggling into your neck.

You let out a soft chuckle as his hair tickles your cheek. “Grimmjow.”

He groans, the sound reverberating against the skin of your collarbone—the place his mouth presses against. ”Does it matter? You’re mine. I’m yours. All I care about.”

“This won’t be easy,” you say.

“Yeah, well, I signed up for you, which is anything but easy. So don’t worry,” he pulls back slightly so that you’re both face to face. “I know exactly what I’m getting myself into. And I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

You barely register Grimmjow’s words before he leans in and roughly kisses you.

And it is the best damn kiss of your life.

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