#just bc i kin the guy doesnt make the idea that the one from my adam tl is out there any less scary

[the-heartbeatclocktower]

i still have seth kins in my dni. im probably not getting rid of that

[zeronetxt]

examples from this post below

Aro/Aces

Jason Todd. I'm fr heavy on this one because i'm gatekeeping him cough cough but to me (idc that its canon that he is not, if i ignore canon its not real) he seems like the type not to really gaf. and honestly, NOT EVERY SUPERHERO NEEDS TO HAVE A ROMANTIC ARC 🙄🙄 take notes from me, dc. i have an demi-aspec oc who is feral af and would totally smother jason with affection and he is thriving (he really isn't, hes a traumatised demon)

Chuuya Nakahara because NOWHERE IS IT MENTIONED (that i could find, at least) THAT HE HAS AN INTEREST IN WOMEN OR MEN. The only one i can think of that he would be interested in is dazai and i see that as a "pikachu! i choose you!" moment instead of a "i hate you, i want to be yours" type of thing. i'm not sure how to explain it, but like a forced crush since they have after all known each other for 7 years and literally dazai can anticipate his movements. (im talking about that one scene in the guild arc i think it was. "WHY YOU!")

Percy Jackson. I'm putting him as demi (still somewhat on the aspec tho yk?) because of his relationship with annabeth. idc, THEY ARE EACH OTHERS ENDGAMES. id say pretty much the same for annabeth, i mean, they knew each other for a while before they fell in love and started dating, but tbf, i have NOT even read the pjo series in a ehile sad face

Jouno Saigiku because i feel like his only interest is justice. i dunno how to expand on him, but yeah. i love jouno so much and if he really do be dead before i get a suegiku reunion, im firing everyone

Tetchou Suehiro. he's an (adorable) oddity in itself, but still serious. I don't think he'd be looking for a relationship, especially in his line of work. he is quite literally an overworker. MY BOY IS TRAINING EVEN DURING MEETINGS. however my one exception to 'bro has no feelings' is jouno. why? learn in the bi section of this (its quite obvious tho)

Ranpo Edogawa. Mostly because have you seen him? i'd say his only interests are solving crimes and his snacks (and obviously the ada). obviously he has more, but those are the main ones that come to mind. other than the (probably) one sided rivalry of ranpoe where i swear poe is the only one that says theyre rivals, i dont think that he's the type to make relationships with others outside of the ada. maybe the hunting dogs/pm if he really had to, but i kin him, and i say he is

Trans people (mostly just trans men, im sorry to my girlies 🥺)

just a not i want to put, i think i only put trans guy hcs bc i myself am transmasc lewl

Junichirou Tanizaki. Sorry, i feel stereotypical for saying this, but his body, my dude. also his style, in the manga, he wears a black top underneath his white vneck(?) whichh to me feels like its a binder. also i love that ranga and naomis relationship w him kinda makes me sad, but ill post my theory on that another time. and also his hair (beautiful and gorgeous btw) just makes me so happy w the little clips and stuff. baggy shirt my guy, great style.

Jason Todd SOMETIMES. i think i just want to relate to him a lil, because im a lil silly like that.

chuuya nakahara on occasion but i think its just because were the same height 🧍

ryuunosuke akutagawa because honestly a trans aku would be interesting but not that relevant. idk, i like the idea of it

Bisexuals/Pansexuals

ATSUSHI NAKAJIMA!!! I MEAN THINK ABOUT IT. lucy??? akutagawa??? BROS HAD HEAVY MOMENTS WITH BOTH OF THEM. i can not see him as anything but a disaster bisexual honestly.

Jason Todd (again HA). Seeing as people can be pan/bi as well as aro/ace, i see him fitting into that, maybe demi-bi or something. he doesnt really strike me as the type to fall in love quickly, but he doesnt really care what he falls for, he cares for whom he does. i am a jason todd hc kinnie

Michizou Tachihara. my goody, i dont ship it but tachigin is just right there. and the scene during the corruption arc w tanizaki (i am not romanticising this but i feel like i am, DEAD). i love the content w him, and also i noticed he and juni pretty much have the same shirt 💀 but also, bro has piercings and dyes his hair, does he just know he is gorgeous???

percy jackson, i'm not even gonna expand

Tetchou Suehiro because BRO AND JOUNO FR. not even gonna lie, if a man (tecchou) says that he would put me above justice for FIVE MINUTES, I WOULD FOLD. thats the main one for me. the other would be the pushups during a meeting. their moments are just cute, sue me

lol im too lazy to come up with i cant think of any more

[running-with-kn1ves]

This idea just hit me but like, I was thinking that maybe there's like tension between humans and supernatural creatures right? So the humans make a task force to sort of keep the creatures in line/negotiate. And one of the best pairs is comprised of like this smooth-talking agent, and their partner a sniper, who's almost never seen bc they're always perched somewhere ready to take the shot if necessary to protect their partner. Jump forward to a negotiation that isn't going as smoothly as they hoped, and the creature, maybe a werewolf kinda cocks their head to side and asks "Who's your friend up in the trees there, they never come down to say hello~" And the agent, trying to take it in stride is like "They're our security policy, Agent X is a very skilled marksman." So they called the reader down, and the creature kinda inspects them. "I'll make you a deal, if you give them to me, I won't wage war on this sector. And like the humans are shocked, and immediately start protesting that they cannot in good conscience hand over an agent to the enemy like this, but the monsters look so serious about this that they have to relent. I just imagine the reader disassembling their gun to go with the creature and looking back at their coworker bc they can't believe they were given up so easily. Turns out the werewolf and his kin have had their eye on the reader for a while. The werewolf especially likes to share the reader with his own personal bodyguard, a rather stoic, well-built man. They're both really possessive but it shows in different ways maybe?

UGH I love this. I have some kind of feral adoration for werewolves; and imagine he's some kind of gang leader on top? Oh boy. (Hope you dont mind I added a lot of my thoughts to this!)

I can see the reader being the quiet, judgemental type while at work. They're used to being silent for hours on account of their job, steathiness being required.Though, that doesn't mean they dont have fire in them. They took this job for a reason, and dont intend on going down without a fight.

I wonder if they're the type to fight back while being traded off, or of they silently comply, knowing at least peace will be kept if they go with?

And I'm curious if this is just a "leader of the pack" kind of werewolf love, or if the leader's entire group/gang is interested in our reader.

I'd like to think that the werewolf is making the negotiation more difficult than it needed to be, mostly in order to get his claws on the reader. Though I wonder how he found them in the first place; perhaps scoping out the human organization to get research on who the clan was dealing with, and he just so happened to come across the reader during a job, piquing his interest?

And I LOVE the idea of him sharing with his bodyguard. Two spooky monster men, preferably tattooed up too? No complaints here. I'd like to think they've probably worked together for years, the werewolf's bodyguard being his closest confidant and both finding each other quite trustworthy.

While the leader might be more of sadistic, teasing type, his bodyguard is the unpredictable, secretly yearning from afar but would never show it, kind of guy.

The leader is more obvious about his claim on the reader, near to the point of outright stating "you're mine." He likes to leave visible signs of his ownership on them, teasing them about it and brushing over the chomp marks on their neck in front of others. I imagine he might be the more jealous type, and has near to no shame. But he does like his privacy at times with his darling when hes not flaunting them.

Though when it comes to the bodyguard, I could see him as the type that tends to hold things in, but doesnt hesitate to get in the way if something happens that he doesn't like. Is more physically possessive, and his actions say more than his words. He doesnt say much, but when he does, he speaks quietly and with intention. He doesnt like to show off when hes with the reader, and rather would keep them in his own grasp, being more inclined to hide them away. I'd like to think hes more sensitive physically than the leader, and more audible when displaying affection, with little grunts or sighs, though it's usually unintentional.

[actualbird]

I got distracted reading 4-04 and 4-05 i totally forgot the actual thing i was supposed to ask you today, what are your thoughts on the kinds of shows the nxx team wouldve watched as kids growing up. MC and Luke have apparently watched animes and even dressed up as characters but i have this need to know the finer details. LIKE. WHAT DID YOU WATCH SPECIFICALLY?? And i remembered you said luke was the one who probably understood most of the terms zangr was saying so like?? Luke do you like these kinds of things?? -Marsh

MARSH, thank you so much for this ask and for the SPECIFIC WORDING "watched as kids growing up." because that makes me have to go back in time and thusly uncovering by far my favorite yet most under-utilized and never-brought-up detail of tears of themis:

the story of this game takes place in the year 2030

DO U HAVE ANY IDEA HOW FUNNIER THIS MAKES SHIT???? AND ALSO HOW MUCH MORE SENSE STUFF MAKES??? let me explain myself by going thru all the boys one by one

luke pearce

YEAH HE SAID HE AND MC WERE RLLY INTO ANIME AS KIDS. luke pearce who is 24 years old in 2030 means that from the Important Media Ages (12-15) it was 2018-2021. this period of time, anime started getting more and more accessible, most notably getting on netflix and stuff like this. so like all the anime on netflix rn? yeah luke's watched them.

though because i kin luke, imma say that his fave is fullmetal alchemist: brotherhood. ive got no characterization proof for this, i just want to give him this honor

additionally, luke is a HUUUUGE fan of the original Sherlock Holmes by Arthur Conan Doyle novels (ACD Sherlock) and i think this would have pushed him to watch like, just every popular sherlock media adaptation there is. he personally liked Elementary better than BBC Sherlock. he generally just gravitates to the adaptations that dont forget about the heart of all of the characters.

also also also, luke likes action movies ranging from "hey this is "good" to critics" to "this is a shit movie but MY GOD IS IT FUN!!!"

artem wing

artem wing who is 29 years old in 2030 means that from the Important Media Ages (12-15) it was 2013-2016. but also artem is a MOVIE SNOB LMAOOO, hes That Guy with the Opinions On Film and you bet that his analytical ass was into just the most extra shit to watch those days because no teenager is chill, every teenager has some kind of ego, i dont know what movies he would have watched at that point to be the Smartest Teenager About Movies, but he sure did watch them

though artem also is very into sci-fi literature and 2013-2016 had a BUUUNCH of huge sci-fi movies. Pacific Rim, Gravity, Interstellar, Arrival. Arrival is deffo artem's fave, dont fight me on this, i can explain further but not in this answer bc it will get LOOONG LOL

artem also is into "classics" which uh. wait artem what do you Mean by that, what is a "classic" for somebody born in 2001??? i dont really know exactly what he means by "classics" so i just take it to mean he's a slut for period dramas which leads me to my closing point

"Once upon a time, when [Artem] was younger, around 17 years old, he pondered identifying as asexual or as one of the subsets under that term, but he put that aside after he first watched Pride and Prejudice (2005). He had then acquired a recurring fantasy in which he would be sensually accosted by Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy in a secluded study after months of furtive, charged glances, lingering, split second touches, double entendres classily and subtly masked but still implying a repressed yet voracious—Moving on." -an excerpt from my comedy smut fic where artem goes thru a crisis. yeah. yeah. Pride and Prejudice dir. Joe Wright was his bisexual awakening.

MOVING ON!!

vyn richter

vyn richter who is 27 years old in 2030 means that from the Important Media Ages (12-15) it was 2015-2018 but honestly that doesnt help me AT ALL LOL BECAUSE VYN IS A TOUGH NUT TO CRACK.....

like honest to god i cant even imagine vyn as anything other than an adult KJBSJKFS (which is depressing, if i think about it more... but also what vyn would want, i assume he would hate for people to have known him as a child, imperfect and shunned.....which is ALSO DEPRESSING. VYN, U GOOD???)

okay yknow what im not studied enough in Vyn Richter Studies so i will come back to this once ive gotten more of his story and know more of his (what im theorizing to be a SHITASS TERRIBLE) childhood history. so vyn, i guess ur safe from me....ur safe FOR NOW, THAT IS....

marius von hagen

marius von hagen who is 21 years old in 2030 means that from the Important Media Ages (12-15) it was 2021-2024. good fucking lord, marius was born in 2009 and that makes him so young that his Important Media Ages arent even DONE HAPPENING IN OUR CURRENT TIMELINE, JESUS....

2021 is an interesting era of entertainment because it is getting steadily more and more apparent that corporate greed is trying to swallow up good storytelling; movies and shows are made as fast food products to be consumed immediately and thrown away just as fast. there are smarter posts and articles talking about this, but my point here is that marius "believes SO MUCH in art and art's capability to make a difference" von hagen would HATE THIS SO MUCH and, through spite, get into a lot of indie medias that dont necessarily sell. smaller movies, tv shows that got cancelled way before they should have.

oh, hey, MARIUS WAS 12 YEARS OLD IN 2021, yeah he could have watched The Owl House and threw a fucking FIT when disne/y nerfed the show's third season. he has not forgiven and he has not forgotten.

regardless of his age, marius, at some point in his teens watches Vincent and the Doctor (s5 e10 from Doctor Who). for those who dont know this episode, it involves Vincent Van Gogh and a bunch of sci-fi stuff but, at the end, a scene where Van Gogh is taken to the future and shown the impact his art has made on people. please watch it, if you havent it, it's very good and no words can do the experience justice.

anyway yeah marius watches it and it makes him FUCKING SOB

yeah so these are my takes kdjbfdsjfs

[single-malt-scotch]

me and my controversial topics will stay under the cut lol.

i know i blabbed lightly of this probably but obviously one of the things that put me off from mcyt for a few years was when the "rpf is bad" opinion started circling the internet more frequently, in tumblr's 2014-2016 toxic callout culture era. i think that era shifted YT fandoms as a whole and turned loads of ppl to presenting creators with their "characters" specifically (like i recall this early on w markiplier and jacksepticeye) and clarifying it often. but i find this all very amusing when 80% of the ppl dont actually play characters at all, and ppl are either just writing "rpf" or theyre just turned a creator into their own OCs. i think its sometimes just a way to not associate with the idea of rpf even if its like, right there.

like, the problem i think is that the majority of fans, namely the young teens that are the main audience, are very consumed by purity culture and being free of problematic interests in such a black and white way. i get it, i understand why you dont want to be associated with rpf. when i think of weird and uncomfortable rpf i think of.... fan fiction of the Beatles, or something. a band or a movie actor is someone we can easily define as "not a character" but... when it comes to mcyt, its a little more grey, because i know some of them goof around in games and do bits and exaggerate themselves.

and yet i still think its counter productive to get caught up in these woes, and to deny what exactly it means for something to be rpf, or have rpf elements. ironically i think the indulgence people have with making them characters worsens the parasocial/obsessive/skewed lens people have on creators these days. how? well its bc of how ppl get super attached to characters... comfort characters, kinning, etc. i love characters just an intensely, but when you apply this to a youtuber who like, doesnt actually play a character? even tho you wanna act like they do? .....there can definitely be issues in that and its def what makes me not get into the fandom as it is. you elevate them with your view of them as a character by being able to indulge in them way further bc they are kind of "yours" now. but also theyre not really.

but specifically back to the rpf vs not rpf topic- basically what i really intend to say is that like. there is harm in becoming too concerned over what youre writing bc you can fall into that mindset of being far too aware in a way thats just gonna make you feel terrible all the time (i experienced this myself when i was like 15 on tumblr and wanted to avoid any potential of touching something "problematic"). this post isnt to declare you are writing rpf, or you arent, or whatever the"rules" are about when it is or isnt, but just that theres always time to just accept shit as it is when the blurry lines arent actually doing any harm in this case. and that even trying to force yourself into the seemingly right direction doesnt exactly solve all the other problems either.

cuz i did all the things ppl would wanna call me out for and i dont care at this point. i wrote fan fiction where the guys where more characters than themselves, in a fantasy world for the server. but i also wrote fan fiction that was irl and based during minecon! and it was smut. and all i can say to that now is...ok. im not even gonna sit around and vehemently condemn it either? even if i never plan to do it again. cuz i dont see the need to punish my past self, nor do i see the reason to continue questioning the nuances of where the line between hard rpf and hard fiction lies with this bc its a never ending conversation. its just not worth my time to worry anymore. i know how to not be weird about it, i know my boundaries between creator and fan, i dont even get near the extent that some people do... i feel like im aware enough to feel like im not causing harm/can make logical choices when issues arise. i was a niave teenager before, and wrote such things with little thought, and had a much less healthy mindset about it! but the way the internet laid on the pressure of these strict definitions was the moment i felt shame, and as if i couldnt ever redeem myself from actions i understand far better now. its really not worth the stress and heartache to get so caught up in it.

[kaonite]

Can we hear about your Misraaks headcanons pls?

hahahaaha ahah okay so this turned more into picking him apart rather than headcanons but i mixed them in there ::3 (im so sorry, i cannot be coherent at all and gushed profusely. i promise my writing is way different than the way i type this out.)

for some reason it wont let me add tags??? so i hope no one is upset by that!

-misraaks doesnt know how to be 'normal' per say, barring the fact he IS an alien(this goes with my super personal headcanon that the wolves just breed some ODD eliksni. 110% there’s something SUPER up with the wolves (or gentle weavers) as a whole. there's something in the ether turning the wolves into human simps) and is just a weird guy? Who 'turns their back' on their own without being a little fucking odd? i mean if i saw a almost 7ft tall lady and she dragged me away from my attempted suicide (thats some baggage already) and offered peace in a my cultures way id rethink my ideals too (theres more to it i know but humor me!) Also unlearning ALL you've been taught was rough and trying but he was a young mind and to be honest... that's probably for the best (no doubt sjur did use him against the wolves but i really feel their friendship was genuine, full of a lot of love and respect after he stopped being an angsty vandal with unresolved mommy issues)

-he puts on this show of being strong and unyielding but if he trusts you he just crumbles and is bare to the bone about everything. misraaks isn't afraid of being honest per say, he may come off brash but he's just telling it like it is... no sense in beating around the bush. he's not an asshole but being raised the way he was uh... some tact had be learned. 

-no no no it's not bc his mother may have been strict and terrifying to some degree so he has to be the strongest�� or he feels he'll fail everyone he knows. so when someone breaks down his walls he's just a soft, sappy individual who just wants everyone to have a peaceful life together while trying to be strong for everyone else at his own mental expense. hes so passionate, charismatic and driven even with all the odds stacked against him, the fucking STRENGTH in that. (DREG STRENGTH GO! even tho he's not a dreg u get my meaning, everyone so far has deemed him as such) what a king! ❤ (praksis u call him foolish again i'll break every one of the generators in your lab)

-brings me to my next headcanon that the nightmare in the moon, horkis? Is his mother and all the teachings that she and others brought upon him as a child up until meeting sjur concentrated into one being. that if he doesn't bleed for the cause, die for the cause, then he has failed his people.  OOPS! IT'S ALL DEEP SEATED TRAUMA! 

-also headcanon she was the one to dock him? to make it extra good when he thinks back on her in the misraaks lore tab 

(I normally don't slander moms bc damn if anyone slandered my mom id throw hands but bungie gave me the scraps and im working with them and misraaks seemed like he had a pretty standard, though super strict, upbringing ::) )

-he appears haughty, self-assured and a bit cold though that's just how he projects himself... he's not actually that way? I mean, hes pretty calm and collected. he expresses a deep  loyalty and love for Sjur and cares for his fireteam immensely. He trusted his fireteam enough to take them to her resting place, how is that not vulnerability we otherwise don't really see? 

He'd throw down for his friends and loved ones because that's just how Eliksni ARE. kin is everything, even friends. he just has a different way of showing it. 

-misraaks... okay i have to say he's into poetry, or talking poetically. the way he speaks is almost... romantic (not in a bad or spicy way!) i just know that boy really SPEAKS in such an eloquent, thoughtful sense. there's a lot of meaning and love in his words. he doesn't just SAY things to fill the silence. every word has a meaning, a purpose. i love that about him. 

-okay maybe i headcanon his fireteam being all around goofballs with him at times of respite, softening out his sharp edges. making him loosen up and enjoy the little things in life rather than worrying about the bigger picture. (bungie where's that getting drunk with his fireteam lore tab? i would like to see it. you have it with the yw and crow... it's the least you could do for the misraaks stans...) i just feel its hard for him to sit and do nothing, just to fool around, be a "normal person" due to the fact his whole life up to his moment of wanting to create house light has been death and war. He was MADE for war. it'd be hard for him to adjust to a 'happier' existence without a little prodding

-he doesn't care about glory, or is doing what he does for selfish gain. he genuinely just wants to help, to create peace. so if anyone approached him with the kell of kells title he'd promptly tell them to shove it (sorry misraaks... you're in the same boat with the young wolf... you can't escape your destiny)

-can we talk about how much misraaks unlearned from sjur then YEARS later is with dusk, meets the young wolf (that annoying bastard of a guardian! :) ), they spare him then it seems like something unlocks in him. like we were the final catalyst to his dreams being real. no longer did he want to be canon fodder, or use his crew as such, he wanted to lead... to be better, to do better for his people along the guardians. maybe he could be better than just another solider dying for a cause they didn't even know at that point. he could be everything his kind rallied against and be GREATER than he was taught to be , not stepping on those deemed less than him. his MIND 

-can i just shoehorn something in real quick. I don't believe he'd practice docking after everything. I just can't see it and i always see him having trauma around docking so why would he wish that on others as a treatment under his kellship? It took him A LONG ASS TIME to unlearn how fucked up it is and how their society as whole is (ie. he literally fantasized about his mother docking him. how is that not absolutely insane to hear?)  also it'd be useless at this point, he'd need people at their prime, not missing two arms for an old, unnecessary dark practice. he doesn’t want people to fear him, if your people fear you are you truly a leader?

*cuts this ask open with a knife and lets loose a character interpretation more than headcanons* OOPS

am i projecting? maybe but bungie gave me crumbs and i am going to use them

im holding back a bunch of thoughts bc most of them center around much more personal headcanons bc this is my emotional support eliksni :') plus ive written so much already im pretty sure you all think im insane.

If anyone has anything to add feel free! Id love to hear it, you may have some ideas/headcanons/interpretations i didn't list or i never though of! of course... most of this is projecting, who doesn't do that to their fave?

and honestly, i am so open to talking about him in depth, if you want to, shoot me a message! I'll get to it! :3

[dragqueenpentheus]

Okay no one has to read this but i DO have to write it:

PYROC VS FATHER PAUL

Ya bitch needs an art break bc im getting angry about voices existing as i try to keep myself entertained. Today is NOT a god one for sinking into repetitive line work and that’s just about all i have on the table atm

SO! Im gunna do a little thinking about my little meow meows all fucked up by religion. Just a comparison for my sanity and interests. Pyroc is my baby i wrote him for the first time years ago. Five?????????? Whadda hell. Going on six.

ANYWAY john joined religion because of his trauma. His sister died and he felt lost. He was unmoored in this fishing village and looking for reason looking for hope. Hed had his heart broken and trying to make sense of tragedy on his own was totally beyond him. Thats why his interactions with riley in AA are SO good like. He knows that confusion and he knows the rhetoric that’s supposed to combat it. Only it dooesnt work for riley.

The same sort of thing happens for pyrc, only inverted. Loss urns him away from god and religion because its SO strong in his family and not only is he loosing trust in god, but his kin as well. He’s suspicious there’s mre they arent telling him, at the point of his fathers death. And he agrees to, on the surface, absolutely wholly throw himself in to being the second the family and the village need. But he’s keeping his treachery under wraps.

That’s one of the coolest things about father paul imo is like. That slow unraveling of what is. Frankly. An awful half assed plan, driven by fear and loneliness and desperation and dementia and love. Even VERY obvious things like. Taking down the newspaper photo of his young self ‘slip’ by him. I think, on some level, its DEEPLY intentional. He wants people to CHOOSE this. He wants people like bev. He wants people who see him and are in aw of him beating god. Of killing death. He wants to be worshiped and adored and for people to come to him willingly, no tragedy driving them to his arms.

Pyroc also wnats to be worshipped, but he ALSO wants to do the worshipping. He really longs for an element of almost????? But not quite??? Subjection?? He wants to be shown something and for a Great Voice to tell him, unquestioningly and unerringly that it is GOOD. Full stop. And then he wants to spend his life worshipping it. But this booko is an exploration of how….. no such thing exists. And more importantly no great voice exists either. There is nothing wholly good, nothing wholy evil. His lack of faith in himself once he becomes god is him starting to understand that as well. Thats on purpose baked into the lore. The starting point was ‘what if god was a position and in order to get promoted you had to be a murderer. No matter what’. He understands things are not wholly good, at that point. I onder how long it will be for him to realize they are not fully evil as well?

Bc pruitt does hm hm hm an interesting move. Where he takes something the narritve is very sure to communicate is EVIL no wiggle room just fact. Even if its driven by animal instinct its. Evil. And he makes it, not just good, but HOLY. And god i LOVEEEE that for him i ADOREEE that what a MOVE. Driven by desperation and dementia and relief and ‘if god saved me than maybe i can be good despite loving and sinning and maybe if i defeat god then i will be Thee Good’. SO sexy of him. Im really fascinated by his morality. He seems to have an understanding of the shades of grey in some respects??? But if he had a BETTER one with more forgiveness in his heart i feel like hed have left the church anyway after sarah was born??? Even if millie didnt ask him??? That might just be my own sensibilities creeping in but ….. like he culd have seen her on the weekends. He can do other jobs. Hes straight (??? Not totally convinced of this) he could have just dated her that makes me crazy. LIKE OBV HE HAD LINES HE THOUGHT THAT WOULD CROSS AND HE HAD INTERNALIZED THE CHURCH AND THE RULES AND SHE WAS MARRIED AND ECT ECT i know he couldnt have really but. Thye were straight. They coulda.

Im not gunna do fantasy homophobia bc i think its …………….. Boring. But i think some element of??? The vindlegaurd line MUST be passed along and for that particular rules must be applied. But thats also boring as hell :/ maybe i can work in my parthenogenesis lore?????????? I bet pyroc would love building that spell in any universe. That’s the sequal when he goes to magic university in helsin. But yeah i do like the concept that. Anyone can have a baby thru magic its just a time and energy commitment. Just a matter of wanting it enough together. Every baby is so deeply wanted and its mere existence is proof. Thats dope i love that. HMMM to be decided at a later date when im deeper into the story i think. I still havent figured out fully how and where and why orion is going to be invovled and if???? Pyroc and orion are even going to be romantic??????? Im torn im TORn…….

Thikns about john bonding w sarah over science and learning and starts wEEPING…. Like theres some surity beloved. Its just a matter of uncovering. I think sarah felt that same thirst for answers and hunted them differently. Her faith is in logic and science. I loveeee her god. Every scene w her and her dad absolutely RUIN me like!!!!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW LOVED SHE IS!!!!!! I hope at hte very end she saw the blood as the gesture of love it SO clearly was and not him trying to poison her. God i love that she spat it out. GOD. Thats about being gay, btw. Spits the religious offering that could save you across the gasoline soaked church floor like BABE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think we as a collective should talk about the possibiites around sarah/erin more. Bc their defiance combined would be. Earth SHATTERING for crockett.

In the future pyroc gets a kid. Ever since that campaign where Enemy ended up playing his daughter im like. How did i NOT know this idiot wanted nothing more in the entire world than to travel it with his daughter. I dont care how or why hes getting a kid. Hed be so doting and awful abut it. He would need orion as a co-parent for the kids self esteem to be normal levels. thINKS ABOUT PAUL GETTING TO RAISE SARAH AND JUST ABSOLUTELY GASSING HER UPPPPPPPP HANGING EVERY DOODLE SHE EVER MADE ON TEH FRIDGE. BOASTING ABOUT HER SCEINECE PROJECT OT ANYONE WITHIN EYESIGHT EVEN THOUGH ‘WE K N O W JOHNWE WERE ALL AT THE SCEINCE FAIR’!!!!!!!!!!! Let these fuck ups be doting fathers im fucking begging. That scene where paul is like. You take ccare of everyone on the island sarah. Its more than being a doctor. You comfort them.

HM HM comfort is such a thing for Miss Bitch like!! He sees it as a Good Thing. He tries to bring it for riley by asking to hold the AA meetings on island ((also manipulation. Obvously also manipulation. I wouldnt have bene shocked if he was slipping the vampire blood into the coffee every meeting either. But thats just a theory. A game theory.)) ANYWAY he sees comfort as hly. The church gave it to him when he needed it. The angel gave it to him in the cave. Feeling safe and warm is HIGH on his list of priorities and what makes him hand over respect.

I think pyroc has lived a very comfortable life in SO many ways, but in none he. Activly recognizes. A key part of his character arc his him…. Opening his eyes to the world around them. Seeing the privilege he has and being like. Wait. This isnt Right. We have to change thi. And when no one agrees ti shifts to I have to change this. With Violence. A little revolutionary <3 it only costs the life of his whole ass family

Thats more fun comparison ground like…… paul is SO much about I know whats right and there is a cost but i AM ignoring it. Like HE KNOOOOWSSSS he knooooows he just doesnt want o See. I’m not sure if im going to surprise yroc with the ……megadeath of. His whole family. Or if it’s a choice he has to activly make. I think a choice makes it more compelling, more layerd. It has to be in the moment though, becaus ei think thats. A key difference between them. Pyroc wouldnt do it.. hed just leave hed peace out and do what he could in small ways. But he wouldnt do his big stand off with god. Hed shrink his goals in order to not hurt his family. Out of love?? Intimidation?? Some instinct wihtin him that balks at the idea of disobedience??? I think even he doesnt know. But i LOVE john becaue he jsut decides to lie. He closes his eyes and says i am being stupid on purpose. I think thats PERHAPS more compelling than good guy coward pyroc BUT!!!!! Thats who he is rip to ths little man. Cant change him now hes a whole ass child in my head. The PLOT i can change. Him….. not without massive character development <3

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MM set my brain on FIRE!!!! Im so glad nano is coming up. I love sharpening pyroc against the comparison of other AMAZING characters. Father paul hill my beloved millstone <3 anyway sorry to anyone who reads this its literally me unhinging my jaw and emptying my brain out. I had to write stuff that wasn’t novel or fic. A little character time down and dirty. I wil NOT be editing this love and light to future me trying to decode this

[autisticstarseed]

sorry to sound cringe or w/e the fuck but. half the fandom shit you all whine abt being unhealthy is fully normal behavior, we’ve just gotten too used to hiding our like. basic humanity from each other? fiction affects people yall, its supposed to do that, you are supposed to read a story and feel smth, its supposed to engage you, thats 100% how it works, being invested in a fantasy world is literally..... just normal human shit and what fiction straight up exists to do. like. we’ve done it for a while now. we have imagination for a reason. we are supposed to use it in our daily lives. its a human skill. literally why would ppl even make stories if not to impact others. you all cannot in the same fucking breath agree, that certain content which harms others and glorifies awful shit is wrong and should be retaliated against because fiction ofc affects reality, and then go on to do your stupid whiny funnyman fandom cringe bullshit any time you decide people are letting themselves have too much fun in a way that makes you uncomfortable but doesnt hurt you. 

like sdjfjsdf okay we get it you dont have interests outside of the 5-10 tumblr accepted ones, you’re a cool unfeeling social media robot that acts like every other dumbass jester craving validation for being abrasive and uncharming to the rest of society but hey at least you can make a shitpost right i get it i get it sure, but its truly not my job to keep validating your personality of being a hypercritical nihilist and i need for you to understand. it is normal. to like media. many different kinds of media. it all exists for people to like it. stop exaggerating and strawmanning every single person you come across that expresses their interests in a divergent way as this like. horribly unhealthy disconnected nerd who is LOST in a fantasy TM and lives in their basement and jerks off to their waifu instead of talking to real people and is ~hurting themselves~ with their lack of social endeavors or w/e. thats not fucking real you idiot passion is regular, its not anybody elses fault you killed yours off bc you wanted to make certain ppl think ur cool. its normal to project, its normal to feel emotional attachments, its normal to ‘let yourself’ like the ‘cringe’ medias, its normal to buy merch or make your own, its normal to make long and depthful content (forreal so much of this ‘support’ for the hard work of artistry can be so conditional and hollow from you guys), its normal to discuss stories from a realism standpoint because again thats generally the intention, and its. just normal to like shit that isnt real sometimes. it rly is. ideas and thoughts can be valuable. fantasies arent completely worthless.

‘’escaping reality’’ with distraction and immersion Can become unhealthy but it doesnt mean you are literally incapable of having critical depthful valuable thoughts on the reality you live in just bc you find daily joy in something unreal as well and you are honest to god the weird one if you cant get that. especially if you try to use peoples harmless passions as a way to like. jab at their harmless identities or their harmless appearance or their harmless fucking ‘i think harmless behaviors should be supported and left alone’ stances. like wow i am ever so fucking Sorry that the CRAZY TM su kins and marvel stim blogs and theatre kids and tiktok cosplayers creating all this cringey content thats meaningful to them and full of effort and passion just Really truly gives you hives bc of your wretched personality and weird fabricated dramatic assumptions abt their personal life and your inability to positively socialize with nonjudgmental people anymore but like honestly at least they act like a real person and their art and fun matters more to me than your bratty cringe feelings ok those mean dick to me they hold no value in my mind and they dont have to its not my responsibility to baby you for your judgments they dont even equate imo like oh my god just go get some interests you loser maybe it’ll cure your bastarditis !

[courtroom-adjourned-system]

Anyways.

Love (and relationships) is hard itself, but love when you're a system it's even worse, and we (Samu mostly) are experiencing it rn.

-As I already said, Samu is the only one with a girlfriend in this system (my situation is,, complicated), and his girlfriend is poly and got interested in another guy, which we discovered likes her back, so they're getting close, and despite being a rather jealous person, Samu is really, really trying to accept this. I really appreciate his efforts.

-This is my stuff goin' on and even if I ain't that good in English I'll try to explain I mean. It ain't the fact that she's with that guy. He ain't even that bad. He looks like Shinsou kinda. I kin Shinsou. It's more the fact that I feel like a game bc I don't have a body. Yeah, I am a real person, but for her I kinda ain't if not from my voice pitch and accent. The fact that I'm in the body of what she's always seen as her best friend (Thess) makes it even harder because it's weird for her to kiss me n stuff, and I understand that, but it makes me feel like I'm in second place yk. She said she gives priority to "external" relationships, what the fuck is even that? I feel like I'm just an anime crush she got and uses when she wants. We talked, and she said that I'm not that and she cares about me but. You know. Being like this, sharin' one body with 8, maybe 10 people, is the worst thing ever. I wanna be free. And I promise I'm trying hard to accept that asshole (from thess: the guy my bsf is dating is really nice!! He's super sweet) in my life, in OUR life. It's just hard. I want to make Jay happy though. So until I don't start likin' this dude for real I will pretend I do just for her.

Sorry for ventin' I had no idea where else to go hope this doesnt sound childish or like a fckin' tragedy.

[lacnunga]

due to the recent attention quincey and my strange love child has gotten, i’ve decided to do a post of my ‘character building’ aka ‘me just aimlessly rambling at Q in tumblr chat and getting overly invested in our hopeless little loser’. enjoy (or dont idk idc)

Naruto oc Gear

·         platonic bff w/ kankuro

·         i feel like they deserve a mullet. they're completely oblivious to why other people Hate it. they think it's cool.

·         "it feels swishy kank. kank. feels like Wind Country style. kank why are you laughing?"

·         nobody understands why someone 'cool' like kankuro hangs around with this dork

·         its like kakashi and gai. kankuro just shrugs - "dude is a good listener. and they write valentines cards to karasu. they're a weirdo and i love them so back tf off'

·         gear:: nyah

·         kank: what?

·         gear, staring at him through their souless glasses: you know, nyah *makes kitty motions*

·         *gear proceeds to be drop kicked all the way to fire country border*

·         also, nobody know whether gear is male or female or...other?? except their doctor, who enjoys keeping it a secret from a frustrated kankuro.

·         gear has promised him a years worth of buying hi hamburger steaks if he manages to find it out, so kank has some incentive

·         its been nearly ten years...no luck

·         temari doesnt understand the friendship, but its not the weirdest thing her fam is involved in so

·         gear is v scared of gaara though, especially when gaara, in a bid to 'understand his family better' tries to get to know him. gear tries to avoid gaara, but he's. always. there.

·         kank in the end tells gear to Just Talk to Gaara, there's like a 50% chance he won't kill them (if only for kank's sake)

·         wind forwards to a v awkward interrogation session where gear tries to explain the appeal of fireworks and the concept of second hand embarassment

·         no wait

·         i just had a brilliant idea

·         gear is the pioneer of light up ninja sandals

·         are they practical? no way

·         are they weirdly satisfying? hell yeah

·         (when too many shinobi got caught in the field bc their sandals lit up, by decree of the kazekage they can only be worn in the village

·         and preferably never, according to Temari)

·         also gear is a big fan of shino. why? (because I love shino) but Actually because kankuro is still bitter about losing to him

·         so when gear meets shino they make it their mission to become Great Friends, aka the Hoopiest of Froods

·         Rub In That Salt. Can You Taste It Kank? All That Salt.

·         their name is now Gear, or in the japanese version, Giya ギヤ (aka just Gear in katakana - hell, if it works for Lee.) fter visiting konoha kank is sulking bc gear went on and on about how shino was a Cool Guy and had Flair and a certain je ne sais quois ( doesnt know what that means, but it sounds adoring and he Hates it. Gear is his friend, not Shinos)

·         Especially when he remembers that Shino kicked his asssss

·         eventually gear gets ticked off and commisions a cake with big writing on it 'STOP SULKING, KITTY'. kank is weirdly frustrated that gear has remembered his favourite flavour cake

·         gear makes him sarcastic friendship bracelets

·         though gear and shino bond over the fact that nobody knows what their faces/eyes look like. its sort of like an Achievement Unlocked.

·         Gear is then integrated into the Aburame family as a honors member

·         Gets home made pies when ever they visit

·         Kankuro is jelly as usual but does not argue over the pie

·         when shino demonstrates his kikaichuu technique, gear waves their arms around making obnoxious buzzing noises. shino sniggers.

·         hell most things can be forgiven for pie

·         gear actually becomes very good at mimicking the kikaichuu noises so when they go back to suna gear makes the noises when kankuro is least expecting it. the suprised punches to the nose are so worth it.

·         I can just see kankuro just spazzing out before just decking this nerd in the face!

·         Ok but Kin adopts them and loves them but just...just hates their fashion sense more then anything in the world

·         she just eyes their mullet with a twitching brow. gear is holding onto their visor with all their might and watching out for any kunai that might come close to his fabulous mane.

·         lets face it, if shino and gear had a bit of a 'snip snip' training accident, kin wouldn't be disappointed

·         and of course if gear becomes friends with shino, they gotta get along w/ team eight as well. kiba is eyeing their hair with a strange mixture of envy and incredulity. hinata draws gear up some new face-masks. they love them, even the pink floral ones.

·         hinata, handing over the masks: d-do you like them?

·         gear, choked up and holding back sobs: they're fine

·         Gear has a habit of coming to Kank in the middle of the night with the weirdest shit. They knock on his door at three in the morning looking like they're about to cry.

·         G: Kank I've done something awful I'm a murderer

·         Kank is basically ready to help bury a body

·         K:okay okay don't panic what did you do?

·         G: *whispering* I eat eight spiders a year kank. EIGHT SPIDERS. HOW MANY SPIDER ORPHANS HAVE I LEFT TO GRIEVING SPIDER WIDOWS KANK. I'm a MONSTER.

·         K:...go home.

·         K: Spends the night googling 'is it true you swallow eight spiders a year?')

·         i have the idea that gear was a really plain child. you know the kind that never really got noticed and people just realised they were there when they tripped over them.

·         and they finally got sick of it when they graduated the academy like

·         'well now im just going to be so Extra you wont have a choice but to notice me fuck you'

·         now thats not to say they realise the mullet is a bad idea, however it does have the extra incentive of people going 'oh hi- DEAR LORD WHAT'S THAT ON YOUR HEAD'

·         plot twist, they look so completely ordinary under the glasses and mask that even the people who saw their face don't remember it the second they look away

·         surprisingly gear makes an excellent undercover operative

·         Just take off the mask and goggles and visor, fashion their hair a lil, and put on a plain kimmon and BAM Gear is an under cover cop

·         exactly. kankuro is really weirded out by the idea that any of the sort of twenty yo people he passes on the street could be gear

·         Kankuro was terrified of gaara but boy o boy does Gear just raise the steaks a lil

·         They could be anywhere

·         Behind that bush, near the bush, IS THE BUSH

·         one time gear was on a mission with their team and they got separated. in the fight, gear lost his mask, broke his glasses and his visor got tossed. when they returned to their team they had to spend the whole journey back convincing them that 'YES this is me i swear see? im wearing the same underwear!' 'how would we know what underwear you started out wearing?' 'I THOUGHT WE HAD A BOND'

·         they meet kankuro on the way into town and gear is just like 'here, kank is my buddy, he'll tell you im me'

·         'well kankuro-sama, is this Gear?'

·         K:...im gonna be honest i cant fucking tell

·         K:but are they wearing blue boxers with ducks on them?

·         Squad captain: WHY DO YOU-???

·         Kankuro: THINGS HAPPENED OK THEYRE WEIRD AND JUST- DO THEY OR DONT THEY?

·         Gear: *shit eating grin*

·         Temari actually thought those two were together for a long time and they both just missed her euphemistic references to their ahem 'friendship' until Gaara mentions they couldn't put romantic partners on a team together and Kank just

·         ucking falls off his chair like

·         K: Wait what? Since when have we been romantic partners?? News to me??

·         When he talks to Gear about it they seem unfazed just straightfaced tell Kankiro that 'you make my kokoro go doki doki'. Kank doesn't speak to them for a week

·         Aka Gear is once again relegated to the sofa

·         Gear seems to say 'so worth it' a lot

·         Most of the time it really isnt

·         Gears surprisingly good a dancing, specifically the fancy pants type dancing.

·         So bc Kank is the kazekage's brother he's invited to a fancy do somewhere and he brings along Gear as his +1 bc hes a loser w/o a bf/gf. before the do he's just pointedly asking Gear like 'look do i need to teach you how to dance? because there will be dancing. fancy dancing. it will be Expected of You. do you want a dance tutor. are you sure? Are You SURE?'

·         Gear is just waving him off 'Relax kitty, its cool' Kank is just mentally preparing apology speeches for Very Important Peoples' crushed toes

·         the night comes along and Kank is making awkward small talk with some girl who roped him in when suddenly he's yanked away from the convo by Gear

·         before he knows it they're on the dancefloor and SURPRISE gear is waaaay better at dancing than kank's stiff penguin shuffle

·         gear takes great pleasure in dipping him really low at the end

·         and they never let kank forget about it

·         so i dont know if kankuro went to the ninja academy but lets assume he does

·         *did

·         so he and gear are in the same class

·         but gear is of course always forgotten

·         until one day kankuro notices them because IDK he runs into them and knocks them over or something

·         so somehow they hang out that day and kank realises 'yeah this kid is a good one i could hang out with this dude like forever. mine now.'

·         and the next day kank tries to find Gear except

·         the fucker is so Unnoticable

·         kank is just standing in the middle of the room scratching his head trying to figure out who the fuck he was talking to yesterday. gear of course doesnt have their sparkling personality yet and so is too shy/embaressed to go up to kank and remind him that 'hey this is what my face looks like'

·         eventually they do hang out again though

·         and the same thing happens

·         kank gets fed up and brings in his face makeup and like draws reminders on gears face

·         gear is fine with it, just wandering around all day with purple paint on their face

·         except ppl keep making fun of them so kank wears the paint as well as like a solidarity thing

·         of course gear finds his own look at the end of their academy days but kank carries on wearing the paint from then on(also gear used to be the kind of person who cried really easily and the paint showed it ALL up. they weren't too keen on walking around with tear tracks and smudges on their face, so mullet it is lol)

·         sad idea

·         gear is kankuro's first and best friend

·         sure, kankuro has other friends, but no real Friends outside of his fam later on, bc when he was smaller every interaction with other kids was coloured by him being related to the Sand Demon

·         kids didn't want to be friends with him bc they were scared for their lives (and kank threw himself into his puppet making for something to do bc puppets werent to emotionally fickle as kids)

·         so he latched onto gear and they became integral parts of their lives without even realising it

·         one day, gear leaves on a mission. they dont come back. they're declared MIA

·         it varies between villages but generally its one-two months before a MIA ninja is declared KIA

·         kank isnt worried about gear. gear is a tough dude, they'll come back.

·         a week passes and kank isnt worried

·         two weeks passes, and he's getting twitchy, spending more and more time hunched up in his studio, tinkering with his puppets

·         three weeks passes without a sign from gear, and he's wrecked seven puppet prototypes in senseless death battles and he doesnt want to think about why he's become so snappy and easily frustrated

·         (temari pops in on him every so often, forcing sandwiches and energy drinks on him even as he ignores her, whittling down a wooden ball joint with singular concentration)

·         the fourth week draws to a close and kank is visiting the mission room every day, lingering inside the doorway, scaring returning genin teams with his impatient aura. he's making trips around the hospitals in case they had an unidentified body turned in (he knows gear by their scars even if their face just wont stick)

·         saturday rolls around and kankuro is dragging himself down to the morgues, the crematoriums, clamping down on the threatening waves of despair - he asks by name, by description, by the rate of decay on any bodies returned by scavenging teams sent out across the sandy oceans

·         there is no sign of gear, not a peep as the fourth week draws to a close, the deadline for Suna mia operatives

·         he goes to the records office to bear witness as they change the status on gear's paperwork, and he feels hollow, like karasu as the red ink is drawn through the status box

·         he returns to his house, silent. temari is there, waiting, with a worried furrow between her brows (he thinks he even saw gaara, who was so changed since the chuunin exams, peer at him through his bedroom doorway opened just a crack, that emerald stare assessing, before retreating again)

·         he closes the door to his workshop with a calm firmness, blocking out temari's questions

·         kankuro stares at his puppets, propped up on various stands and in the corners, half assembled carapaces that seemed to mock him with their glassy stares

·         he snaps

·         kankuro thinks this is what gaara must have felt like, pulled under by the whirlwind of emotions as he rampages, trashing models and ripping up drawings and smashing incomplete headless, armless bodies. it feels like there isn't enough destruction to match the hole gear's death has left in his own chest and he only stops when his fist pulls its punch instinctively, barely an inch to karasu's face, those lovingly sanded planes and features carved with years of practice and patience

·         now karasu is left, his friend before, during, after Gear, and he never thought there would be an 'after Gear' - gear was only a chuunin, they didn't leave the village on any dangerous missions, not like the sand siblings

·         kankuro doesnt leave his workshop for three days

·         on the third he comes out, with karasu and gathers his supplies. he leaves for the funeral, to send off his friend

·         when they had visited konoha, he's seen their Memorial to the dead - a great stone slab, with their names carved into it, the oldest names almost worn away with time and touch. suna doesnt have a memorial - the souls of their shinobi are memorialised at the Oasis

·         the spirit oasis lies a few hours run outside of the city of suna, towards the east - once, or so the tales go, the oasis was part of a giant aquaduct that fed the blooming gardens of a wealthy empress, a long time before the establishment of the hidden villages. now, the oasis is a forest of crumbled stone and faceless statues, a giant pair of stone legs, broken at the knee marking the entrance. past there runs a river, mysterious in its crystal clarity - many suna scientists have tried to find the rivers origins and where it disappears to, but it remains one of the sand's greatest mysteries

·         it became known as the spirit oasis by the first kazekage, who saw the electric blue lights bob and weave above the rushing waters at night - he took it as a sign, and saw, from the top of the tallest ruin, the great crater that he would build his village in.

·         it is to the oasis that the suna shinobi go to remember their dead, and to let them go. it is where kankuro went. it is where he ended up kneeling beside the gently gurgling river, amongst the offerings of food and sake left behind from the visits of other shinobi. bells tinkle melodious in the soft winds, accompanied by the flutter of the shimenawa papers. he looked into the water, so clear he could see the mosaic tiles on the bottom of the aqua duct, and tried to imagine the corpse of his friend, buried somewhere under the grains of sand, lost, decaying until only his bones are left, to be collected one day many generations down, or simply to be forgotten until the gods reclaimed their peoples. kankuro imagines gear's spirit, their soul, instead, bobbing along in this river, laughing and dancing in the night, blue, bright, electric

·         "I- Geez, I can't believe you're making me say this, you idiot. I guess, I miss you. It hardly feels like you're gone. It's been, huh, i don't know how long. For me, weeks, since you've died, but I guess it only really hit me some days ago. You- urgh, you really always need to have the last word, don't you, G-"

·         Kankuro froze as the wind moaned. It was the wind, right? He knew the reports from the shinobi who had visited this place - odd sounds like groans and moans of the deceased spirits, and the embittered jounin who simply waved the tales off as the sounds the wind makes as it howls through the archways and pillars of the ruins.

·         he strains his ear for any other sounds and- there, again. It doesn't sound like the wind, he decides. it sounds like a person, a flesh and blood person. he rises to his feet, slowly pulling a kunai silently out of his pouch. he's ready for an attack as he makes his way through the labyrinth of ruins, following the sounds of grunts and pants of pain. he turns a corner and finds his quarry.

·         a fellow suna shinobi, judging by the tattered dull flak vest. brown hair matted to the head with crusted blood, the shinobi is slumped over a large piece of the ceiling that had fallen down centuries ago. as kankuro approaches, the shinobi gestured weakly with their own kunai, dripping blood onto the weeded tiles.

·         "who..." the shinobi rasps out

·         kankuro doesnt have to hear any more than that word - he recognises the voice, knows it because it's been cycling around his head with endless quips and puns and sarcastic riddles over the past few days. it was a voice he didnt think he'd ever hear again, and now that he has-

·         he dropped his kunai with a metallic clutter and swiftly crouched in front of the shinobi, casually brushing away the brandished knife that couldn't have speared a paralysed mouse. slowly, his hands grasped the drooped chin and he straightened the slumped head, so he could look the shinobi in the eyes.

·         they were brown and bruised around the edges. they stared back at kankuro for a moment, almost dead, before a spark of recognition lit up in them, and they crinkled up. the blood-tinted mouth stretched up too, showing a set of battered teeth. one hand come up to tug at kankuro's hair.

·         "...hey kitty. was the service...good?"

·         kankuro laughs and leans forwards, so his forhead touches the other.

·         "you're- you're a fucking idiot. you asshole-"

·         Gear just grins.

·         ………..

·         also i had an idea about gear's family

·         since they're hoity toity ima imagine they're an Old Clan

·         they were maybe friends of the first kazekage, and howsabout they built the water delivery system for the village

·         sooo even though they're not really relevant anymore (especially with the rise of more modern technology etc) they're still trying to regain that 'friendship'/allience whatever they had with the first kazekage

·         they consider themselves one of the village founders bc of their water systems but they're Not Really. basically the family is pretty stuck up and gear's parents are pretty peeved that Gear doesnt care more about his family history/doesnt conduct themselves with dignity

·         Gears parents are snooty plumbers

·         family name = 水瓶座/mizugameza

·         aka Aquarius/water bearer

·         not their original name but they rebranded themselves all fancy like after doing the village plumbing lol

·         gear is actually kind of embarassed about their family's attitude which is well known (and sometimes mocked) around the village

·         they prefer to just be known as Gear minus family name hence Kankuro didn't actually know which family Gear was a part of until quite a bit into their friendship

·         Gear ur a beautiful child I'm glad u were made

·         gear deserves all the happiness

·         the only reason im glad they're not canon is so they're spared the boruto ending

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