#just about blew my head off fyi

[housewifebuck]

Ever heard of titfucking? Can you write Buck being obsessed with Eddie's tits?

What happened to hello…how are you…..

[cartierdreamx]

𝕯𝖊𝖘𝖙𝖎𝖓𝖊𝖉 𝕿𝖔 𝕱𝖆𝖑𝖑 *2*

Hi my sweet ones <333, hope you’re well! Sorry for the little wait but I hope the wait is worth it sooo here’s chapter 2, not much to say but I may have teared up a bit writing this and now as I type this my heart still hasn’t recovered, so I apologise in advance hehe. Anyways, I hope you enjoy and if you do, please consider reblogging, following and commenting! Thank you all for your constant love and support! J <33 

If you would like to be apart of a taglist so you know when the next chapter comes out, comment down below or let me know thru asks!! Also please make sure your tags are on, so I’m able to tag you 🫶🏽

Pairings: jenna ortega x fem! Reader 

Warnings: angst cityyy, dark themes, swearing, mentions of weapons and violence and murder. 

This fic is STRICTLY 18+, as it involves adult themes, minors DNI, you are responsible for your own social media intake, which includes reading entertainment which this fic falls under, so one last warning- this fic is 18+. Thank you!  

*though my fics have real people, my fics are just for entertainment and far from reality*

FYI: JENNA IS G!P IN THIS FIC!!

~~

The sting in your eyes was accompanied by an adorning number of buzzes from your phone, annoyed and slightly hangover, mainly from the lack of hydration, because you were no lightweight, you could promise any drinking buddy that, you shove your phone under your pillow, praying that would drown out the buzzing. But, of course, to no avail, whoever or whatever global state of emergency was blowing up your phone, the vibrations so strong, it was tectonic, the buzzes greeted your ears through the bamboo pillow wrapped in silk. Having had enough, you groan and answer a call from Sol.

“Sol, I swear to GOD, someone better be dying.” Your annoyance so clear, it auscultates her ears.

“Y/N! YOU ARE MY STAR GIRL, DYING? THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE EXACTLY.”

Though she can’t see you, confusion paints your face as you slowly sit up and wipe your face, allowing yourself to wipe away the fatigue, after stepping out of Ortega Towers, your little after party consisting of publishing an article, skincare and pyjamas was a blur, in fact, you were so out of it, you considered maybe you hallucinated ever hitting publish. However, the entire masquerade stuck with you, the stench of man who tried to feel up on you left the second you stepped outside for air, but what didn’t was the crown queen of San Francisco, her vanilla essence imprinted on you, so after a night of tossing in turning, no movement could remove her from you. You don’t like it though, and it was ironic, you rejected and blew her off the second you got the chance, but you couldn’t remove her from you. There were fires starting to spark all over your body and the more you deny them, the stronger they burn, funny enough, one grew in your groins. And as repetitive as you sound, you hate it. You hate her. You, hate Jenna?

“What’re you talking about?”

“Oh, don’t act so coy and humble!”

“Sol, I’m like, genuinely serious.” You let out a soft chuckle.

“YOUR ARTICLE, BABES!!, IT BLEW UP, I AM SO PROUD OF YOU, TELL ME EVERYTHING, WAIT NO, GET CHANGED, LET’S GET LUNCH BEFORE WE HEAD INTO WORK. LOVE YOU.”

Without even giving you a chance to breathe, blink or your heart to beat, you hear her hang up, guess you have lunch plans in about 2 hours. Now, about your article, you have no clue what you wrote, only that you couldn’t stop writing the second you sat down, nervousness rivers through your blood, breathing adjacent to your heart rate just thinking about what you wrote, what people think, hell, what Jenna thinks. Oh my God, is she going to kill me? You shake your head trying to rid of that negative thought, Jenna wasn’t like that, she’s above killing innocents, but are you innocent? Mouthing out the last line of your article; … whether it be by her heart, her touch, or her gun, anyone that knows the elusive Ms. Ortega is destined to fall. Your face meets your palm and you’re sure if Jenna or anyone in the family read this, you are sure to meet your maker.

~~

“Wowwww, Jenna, she only knew you for a few hours, but she has every part of you right down to a T.”

Viv giggles as she scrolls through the article, enjoying every little bit of Jenna’s distraught, it was a rare occasion to see the mafia queen like this, and barely anyone could have her like this; a newfound superpower of yours.

“Shut it, Viv, it’s an okay article, and that’s me being generous.”

“I can’t imagine what she’d find out about you if she had stayed for longer.”

“I have no secrets.”

“You’re an idiot if you believe that.”

“Okay, fine, it’s a good article, y/n’s a feisty one.” Jenna finally caves in and shrugs.

“And plus, why do you care about some article?”

“I don’t.”

“Ah, but you do care about her.”

“Shut up, Viv, go make me a coffee.”

Laughter induced tears almost well up Viv’s eyes as she hears Jenna’s commands “oh, buddy she wrote you so good, down to your ego and arrogance, I’m not an assistant, babe, fix your attitude.”

Jenna rolls her eyes at Viv as she blows her a kiss and walks off to complete her long list of errands to complete and maybe some target training later in the day for her own indulgence. Bruce, whose body collected every will to keep silent as he knows he would be putting up with Jenna’s groggy and bitchy attitude all day if she did get riled up enough, but his mental strengths wasn’t as strong as his physicals.

“Bruce, I can see you smirking, knock it off.”

“Sorry, boss.” The 6’8ft, brunette man exclaims, though still smirking.

“You know, you make look and share the same name as Batman, but boy, you sure do lack the mental obedience, quit smirking!” Jenna pouts as she smacks his shoulder, “go scare our shareholders will you, I’ll meet you just before the meeting starts." Bruce chuckles as he leaves Jenna, alone with her thoughts.

And what are her thoughts? You. Rumination isn’t enough to describe how you flood her mind, how you fuel her hunger, how she hates how she doesn’t hate you. But you hate her? As two souls collide, their thoughts are evermore intertwined, and collide was definitely a word you could use to describe the thoughts both of you guys share. What gets her brain twisting the most and her throat closing in is the fact her heart is in denial about what it wants. Jenna would be caught dead before she made herself vulnerable before you made her vulnerable.

She had meetings the entire day but seeing that she’s the ones with guns and glory, no one dare to take her up on being tardy or last-minute cancellations, but despite her arrogant nature, she was respectful, and she was kind to those who deserved it, but even then, her guard was never down.

As her after lunch meeting finishes, she strides up and down the room, looking out into the city, only canvasing confusion on Viv and Bruce’s face.

“Cancel the rest of my meetings, please, Viv. Bruce, take the day off, do whatever you want, I’m heading out.”

Viv and Bruce comply and as Jenna starts heading for the door, Viv can’t help but tease “maybe this time, don’t be a dickhead to y/n, we like her.”

“No promises.”

~~

Allowing the feminine urge to take over, you order a Caesar salad, a huge bowl of fries and a diet coke, such a perfect combo. That, with an extra side of chismosa with Sol, it’s a perfect lunch, however, the topic of gossip was you, you and Jenna that is.

“So, you didn’t hook up with her?” Sol, sighing, sounding deflated and defeated, for some reason she was really rooting for you two, she was so adamant about it.

“Sol, you have some sick delusion running through you, not healthy.” You tsk at her, “besides, I’m sure her sugar bear was enough company.”

Sol gasps so loud out of entertainment she grabs the attention of a few others having lunch. Not wanting people to eavesdrop, you give her a maternal ‘quiet down’ look.  

“Oh, don’t give me that look, I’ve been waiting so long to hear this, tell me more.”

As Sol further indulges in your suffering, you slowly start wishing you two had lunch back at the office or your loft, you were sure other lunch goers used you as a source of entertainment.

Back at the office, a warm standing ovation greets you, with everyone’s eyes and smiles lighting up the second they saw you, maybe they are genuinely impressed, but maybe because they’re all about to get a huge payout from the rising popularity of your article, usually rival companies don’t boost each other’s articles, then it wouldn’t be competition, but yours struck the entire nation, the likes of Buzzfeed and TMZ bowed down to you, making articles about your piece of art. However, as much as it was a piece of art, there’s some part of you that felt guilty about pressing publish, maybe the world didn’t have to read about Jenna’s ego in writing, it could’ve just been left untold, you were the one to tell it. Much like Jenna, your day was filled with meetings, but distraction got the best of you, you barely focused and you couldn’t even tell the higher ups what you plan was next, but nevertheless they were highly impressed with you. So impressed, that there was talk about you moving up, career wise.

At the end of your day, exhaustion kisses your body, you were all Jenna’d out, if you had to speak about Jenna one more time, you were sure to implode, not that you had anything against the people asking you, it was a fair thing to be curious about, but, you wish that maybe this was a one-time thing, that she isn’t your shot to success, that she isn’t running your world, that maybe, you would never hear from her again.

“Hello, Ms. L/N.” A familiar voice speaks, the same person who was anonymous with you on that balcony looking out into the skyline was an arm’s reach. But this time, you waste no time in turning around. A big sigh showcases your defeat, so much for never hearing from her again.

“Miss me?” Jenna teases, definitely not missing her, a plan sparks in that sly mind of yours.

“Hey Sol, look I have someone here who is dying to meet the person behind Bayseyes.”

You see Sol’s jaw drop to the ground as her eyes relay the fact that Jenna Ortega is standing in her building to her brain. “No, I don’t miss you.” You chuckle at her, as you head out, if only you turned around to see Jenna’s reaction, it would have made everything all worth it. Though she was fed up with how well you could turn her down, and she’d let it slide, she was impressed at how well you thought on your feet.

~~

As Jenna relays what happened to Viv and Bruce, she swears smoke spills out her ears as they belly laugh at her failure, their knees weak at every word that leaves Jenna’s mouth, Bruce had to hold Viv and himself to make sure they didn’t topple over.

“Whew, Jenna, she has played you in every way, I love this girl, when she coming back?” Viv teases.

“She’s never coming back.”

“Yeah, clearly, your attempts to reel her in is like fishing with a plastic rod.” Bruce adds, Viv’s face lighting up with pride.

“No, she’s not welcome here.”

“Mhmhm, the same way she’s not welcome in your heart.”

“No, I kicked her out.”

“AH HAH, so you admit she was in your heart.”

“WHAT, NO.”

“Boss…” Bruce cringes.

“WHATEVER, I’M LEAVING.”

The same record plays as she leaves the room, Bruce and Viv hysterically laughing trying to figure out the badass you are.

~~

The next day, it was all the same, this time, Jenna waited for you outside the building with a black Porsche behind her as she leans. As it was all the same, the rejection was no different, blowing her off again as you strut the other way, making sure Jenna saw you roll your eyes at her, more rejection, more laughter and taunts from Viv and Bruce.

3rd times the charm is the saying, yet not everyone is proven to be successful, Jenna was one of them, it was irking her and getting under her skin that she couldn’t bag you, but no matter how much you frustrated her, she would never admit she wants you, she’d lay a blanket over her feelings for you, hiding it as she wants you within her reach so she, herself can make you bleed, the same way you did. But maybe she does want that, maybe all she wants is to see you fall, you don’t know who she is, but she seems to know who you are, well, what she could find out about you. But funny enough, her level of power doesn’t get her through to your hidden files. It was redacted, and not even you knew about them.

Number 4 took a different approach, this time she asks Sol for help, begging her to get you to meet her, and as much as Sol wants to, and trust your gut, she wants to, so bad, her loyalty to you was no match for Jenna, Sol turns Jenna away, and to add a cherry on top, you recruited help from a colleague of yours, he was very handsome, and a gentleman, so you two played pretend in front of Jenna’s eyes, arms linked with laughter filling the barely visible gap between the two of you. This fuelled the fire burning in her chest, a feeling she had never felt before, jealousy, and jealousy is a bitch. Jealousy caged Jenna, how could this feeling make the most powerful woman in America bend at her knees, how could you make the most powerful woman in America suffer with every inch of her. You, y/n, you are the indulgence of her soul but the starvation of her heart. Jenna’s first instinct was to hurt you, hurt him, how could he kiss the cheek of her woman? You’re not her woman. Murder was on the table for him, and torment was on yours. Anything to ease her suffering, but she couldn’t, she can’t, as much as she wants to, and as much as she could do it with ease, you breathing was more important.

Maybe day 5 would be different, you thought as the clock hands strike 6pm, and so you were right, instead of being greeted with the ever-greedy Ms. Ortega, you were met with Viv’s warm embrace and Bruce’s masculine yet warm stature.

“Jenna’s getting her right hands to do her dirty work?”

Viv and Bruce share a smile, “as much as we love to see her wallow in doubt and pity, and finally see her humbled, you’re killing her.”

“And how is that any different to when she has a gun to someone’s head?”

“We know, she deserves it, but, for us could you consider not torturing her?”

“Look, you guys seem so nice and a very lovely pair, but I’m only doing this because she won’t stop, and I’m sure doing this would be a lot more efficient than telling her to stop, and honestly, I’m surprised I’m even alive right now.”

“Y/N,” a solemn tone escapes Viv, “she’s not like that, you know.”

“I don’t, I don’t know, and like you heard me say before, how could I let her in if she’s everything I stand against. We are two opposing forces, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t you want to know?” Bruce steps in.

“Guys, there are plenty of women out there who wants Jenna.”

“Yeah, but none of them are you.”

“And none of them will be me, I’ll delete the article if it’ll help, but I’m sure everyone has their copies, I’m sorry, I didn’t want it to be like this, I didn’t want to attend the ball.”

“No, it’s okay, don’t apologise, we’re sorry it had to be like this, but we’ll leave you be, we’ll talk to Jenna.”

“Thank you,” giving Viv a warm hug, possibly being the last hug, you’ll ever give her and Bruce a kiss on the cheek, more than you’ve given Jenna.

As you leave, Viv turns to Bruce “oh someone is so getting hurt at tonight’s mission.”

He chuckles, “you know how she copes.”

~~

Finally, a chance to breathe and relax, you were out shopping, giving yourself a self-care day filled with everything you needed after the stressful week you just had. Sol wanted to accompany you, hoping to cheer you up, but you reassured her you’ll be fine and that this was something you had to do on your own. Walking past the dress boutiques, a dress similar to your masquerade dress catches your eyes and you can’t help but stop and admire it, but truthfully, the dress reminded you of her, of Jenna, you hate to admit it but there was some part of you that missed her adamant tries at winning you over.

“It’s pretty dress, but nothing compares to what you wore that night.” A voice you know all too well.

“Jenna…” A sigh of defeat leaves your lips.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry, I just had to see you, y/n.”

“Are you stalking me now?” Genuine question.

“No, no, I was out shopping, well, yes, I had to shop but I knew you frequent here so I took a chance.”

You let out a soft giggle, “I’m not even going to question how you know that but okay, you have me.”

“If I had you, we wouldn’t be here.”

You smile, not knowing what to say, your heart almost breaks for her, you’ve never seen her raw like this, almost as if you make her vulnerable.

“Look, I just want to say I’m sorry, for everything, for every arrogant remark, for every uncomfortable situation I put you in, for playing games with you, for sending Viv and Bruce to do my dirty work, for wanting you, y/n.”

“Jenna,” you grab her hand and caress it, hoping it relieves some of her pain, and maybe now your brain will believe she’s being genuine, and as much as your heart wanted to hold her, you know you can’t. “It takes a lot to apologise, so thank you.”

“It’s no problem, but uh, I know I shouldn’t, but I’d hate myself if I didn’t take this chance, maybe I could take you out to dinner? Apology dinner, on me.”

“Heh, that’s sweet of you to offer, but I’m sorry, I can’t, take Viv and Bruce out for me instead.” You smile at her, trying so hard not to tear up, feeling that choking feeling build up in your throat.

“Do you hate me?” That same question, she asked you that very first night.

“Again?”

“Y/N, tell me you hate me, it’ll make getting over you a whole lot easier, knowing you hate me is a better outcome than knowing you don’t, because if you don’t, my chance of you, my chance of us was out there, but my hands were not strong enough to grasp it, maybe I made the wrong deal with the universe, I don’t want to live a life where we could’ve been, just tell me that you hate me, please, y/n, please.”

If your heart didn’t break before, your heart definitely broke now, this was her, this was Jenna, raw and vulnerable, you wanted to speak, but it seems there was a stronger force out there that withheld you from speaking, instead, you lay your soft hand on her cheek, wiping away a lone tear, so close to Jenna’s lips you could feel her breathing. As she closes her eyes and leans in ever so slightly, you let go, leaving her with a maybe.

Too broken to look at you, Jenna offers “at least let me take you home, it’s getting dark, I know you didn’t drive here, and I know how dangerous the streets can be at this time.”

“I’ll be okay, Jen.”

Maybe it was the right choice, maybe your actions will have consequences.

~~

Too lost in your own world, thinking about what happened between you and Jenna, you don’t notice the looming figure behind you, Jenna occupying you so deeply, you didn’t realise they’ve been following you since you left the mall. Lucky for you, walking past a closed shop with windows out the front, you’re able to see a dark figure behind you, you quickly decipher the figure being a man, but his face is covered so you don’t recognise him. As your heartbeat quickens, so do your steps, actively trying to lose him, you take a sharp turn into an alley, bad mistake. A breath of relief and fatigue exists your lungs as you turn and see he’s not behind you anymore. But.

“Think you could get away from me that easily?” The man appears in front of you, making you jump, but leaving you stuck in place, too scared to run. As you scan his face, your heart sinks, making the connection that this is the same man from the ball, the same one who was harassing you, but Jenna had him thrown out.

“Yeah, now that pretty face remembers me.”

“Please, just let me go, I’ll give you money, is that what you want?”

He scoffs, grabbing your wrist so tight, he may be cutting off circulation. “I don’t care about money, they pay me enough, what I want is you, I want you to hurt.” Suddenly, a sharp sting numbs your face as he slaps you with all his might, knocking you off your feet, you scream.

“That’s right, scream, bitch.” Kicking you in the abdomen, making you give into his wants, screaming more.

“Please.”

“No point in begging now.” He kicks twice more before picking you up by your shirt, you too much in pain to even look at him in the eyes, but the pain would keep going, he holds you up against the brick wall and starts going in for punches, left and right, your nose starts bleeding, you’re sure your ribs are broken, every punch, slap and kick was multiplied by 10, he kept on going, no matter how much you screamed, he didn’t listen.

“Where’s Jenna now? That’s right, she’s not here, can’t go running to her for help.” He was right, you can’t go running for help, you couldn’t, maybe you should’ve gone with her, maybe you should’ve never pushed her away, tears run down your face joining the splatters of your blood on the concrete ground. He starts thrashing you around, making sure every part of you is bloodied, broken, and bruised. “Scream her name, I want her to know you screamed for her, but she was nowhere to be found.”

You were sure you were going to pass out, instead flashing lights come by, there was hope, but that was short lived when you realise it was a large SUV instead of a police car.

“JAMESON, what do you think you’re doing.”

“Sir, I did what you told me.”

“I told you to scare her, not beat her to a pulp.”

“I got carried away.”

“Evidently, I ought to give you to Jenna for this.”

“But she’s your rival, sir?”

“Yeah, but you beat her girl up to a pulp, I don’t need her coming for me just yet, and plus, she’s the key to breaking down Jenna’s walls, making her vulnerable, seeing that you nearly killed the key, you nearly ruined it for us.”

“I apologise Mr. Marcello.”

“Mr. Marcello is my father and uncle, you know better.”

“I’m sorry, Gio.”

“Now, I gotta clean up your mess, hop in the car, killing you now would be a mercy compared to what Ms. Ortega would do to you, oh and drag her in the car.”

“Yes sir, are you going to give me to Jenna?”

“Considering it, if you don’t shut up, it’ll be a yes,” now turning to you, your barely functioning body with a tremendous number of cuts, scrapes, and bruises, “you Ms. L/N are fascinating, who are you and why do you have Ms. Ortega wrapped around your little finger.” Your eyes lacked the ability to focus, and your mind was fighting to stay awake, and you barely heard the conversation between the two men, so it made it hard to figure out who was with you, staying alive was the one thing on your mind. And in this moment, the scariest moment of your life, you doubted life would be in you, once he lays you on the seats, your fight with your mind was over, you pass out, not knowing where they were taking you.

~~

As your eyes focus on what was in front of you, the familiar rooted buildings jumpstarted adrenaline, with indomitable human spirit and a bit of delusion, you somehow make it to the entrance of Ortega Towers. As you collapse the second you drag yourself through the doors, you hear Viv scream.

“Y/N?!! OH MY GOD.”

She rushes towards you cradling you in her arms, begging you to stay awake, to stay with her.

“YOU, GO GET JENNA NOW.” She yells at a young associate.

“But she said she doesn’t want to be disturbed.” He was scared to go up to Jenna and let her know of the situation, fair enough, she’s a scary woman and even scarier to the newbies.

“I DON’T CARE, I’LL TAKE THE HEAT, TELL HER Y/N IS HURT.” He rushes off with speed and not even 3 minutes later, Jenna came running down, you hear her yell something, but your body was on lockdown mode, nothing was working, nothing was focusing. All you know is that you’re in pain.

As Jenna takes over for Viv, so Viv can get medical help, she cradles you. “Hey, hey, y/n, stay with me, okay? Stay with me, please.” She strokes your hair, trying so hard to not let the tears fall, you couldn’t see her like this. No one can. Luckily, Bruce and his crew of soldiers was able to escort everyone out.

You want to, you want to keep your eyes open, but your body was winning this round, and if this is where you’ll die, at least you were in the arms of Jenna. With all your might, you muster up to speak once more.

“I hate you, Jenna.”

“I know.”

~~ 

Thank you so much for your support <3 I hope you enjoyed! 🦦

hehe sorry about the angst, I think this is one of the most angstsiest shit i’ve ever written, and shout out to @lonelym00n cus she had to endure getting tortured as r and getting tortured as herself 😭 (she’s viv). 

it is 5am where im at, im going to sleep, goodnight 🤝

TAGLIST: @somegaybae @omega-horus @lonelym00n @dksjskx @lazyturtle0-0 @jess-1-e @zaclewiss @lostgirl1415 @pitifulbinx @talialeih @amessbian @iamthewoe @aiakuma @user173781 @darkwolf1623 @dvrkhcld

[philsmeatylegss]

Hiii I just saw a post Abt the v day video and how it's fucked up and such and I was just wondering why? I found it a few years ago but it was just kinda cute tbh what's wrong with it? Lmao I'm definitely a newer phan, I only started really following their stuff in like 2017 so I don't know too much about early dnp lol

Oh fuck I’m old

I think it’s safe enough to finally talk publicly about it.

Basically the vday video was a video Phil made for Dan for Valentine’s Day. He uploaded it privately onto his YouTube channel which Dan had the password to so Dan could see it. At this time, Dan was on vacation (pretty sure in India) and he wouldn’t have been able to see a video of that quality just through text or email. Shitty luck, the same time he privately uploaded it, infamous YouTube glitch happened where all private videos became public. And one of the videos that went public was the v day video.

There’s a lot of jokes about Dan in 2012, but it’s actually really depressing. Dan wasn’t out yet and he had a fuck ton of trauma surrounding his sexuality. 2012 is when dnp started blowing up enough to where they became part of popular early YouTube so people saved the v day video when it was uploaded.

They’ve only addressed it a few times in which they said it was an April Fool’s prank, which obviously doesn’t make sense, but what were they supposed to say? According to legend, people would keep reuploading the video and Phil would spend hours taking them down one by one and it would say “AmazingPhil took down this video for copyrite.”

It was a catalyst to just a really shitty period for dnp. All aggressively heterosexual clips from Dan’s liveshows are my 2012. “FYI I like vagina” is 2012. People were contacting his 14 year old brother to ask about him and Phil. That alone is both fucked up to drag a kid into this, but remember that Dan still wasn’t out to his family. It was probably so fucking terrifying when his YouTube life, especially regarding his sexuality and relationship, clashed with his family life for the first time.

There’s a noticeable difference between their relationship in videos from 2009-2011 and 2012-2015. And it is most likely because dnp blew up pretty big in 2012 and started going from making YouTube videos for fun to doing it as a job with the added pressure of millions watching. And the catalyst, or at least metaphorical catalyst, from the switch between being openly touchy feely giggles to strict, five feet apart mates is considered to be the vday vid.

It was a big problem in the phandom since it was leaked to around 2017ish. A lot of people were circulating it and word was that they were still being taken down years later, implying that Phil was still searching for the video years later.

The phandom used to be primarily 12-16 year olds. And when you’re that age, speaking from experience, you don’t understand the complexities of the situation and just kinda thought “teeheehee phan is real XD.” When in reality, it was a very sensitive and serious thing that wasn’t meant to ever be seen by the public. It’s literally where the cherry lube and kissing at the Manchester Eye reference is from.

Rightfully so, the video became more and more taboo to mention and most people caught on that it was a shitty thing to upload or share it. It used to be really taboo and affectionately was often referred to as “the video that shall not be named.”

It honestly has a backstory that is so story-like that it seems unreal. So much had to happen for it to be leaked and the impact it had on them was so large it’s like a black hole in phandom history.

It’s possible not all of this is accurate, this is just the basic lore of it. So while I don’t think the internet police will drag you to prison for saying you watched the vday video, this is the context behind it. Do with it what you will.

Spending your entire preteen, teen, and now 20s as a phannie will fry your brain in unimaginable ways. I knew this off the top of my head😭

[hollybell51]

Without you

^I would do anything for him

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Philip Pearson x fem!Reader

Travelers (2016)

Word count: 9.6K (I'm as shocked as you dw)

Summary: things come to a head between you and Philip after a close call.

Content: SMUT smutty smut smut. Gratuitous smut. Bit of angst, bit of blood (not too graphic dw), arguments and all that fun stuff. Swearing, cannon typical tomfoolery, making out, hickeys, making out on a table, and a bed, drug references (guys it's Philip), mentioned weird Traveler number names (I made one up just fyi don't bother googling it), blowjobs, bit of dirty talk, bit of hair pulling, vaginal sex, safe sex (yay! Trojan please sponsor me), a little fluff at the end. Philip could possibly be a little ooc I actually can't tell but I did try.

Notes: ok so I've done it again, disappeared for weeks and then popped back up with a new obsession for a stupid little dude in a stupid little show and I've gone and written some stupid smut about it. Philip makes me insane. I cannot tell you how insane he makes me. Like... he is objectively mid. I know this. But he's also so hot??? Like do you get what I mean??? Also WHERE is all the other content for this dude like come on guys I cannot be on my own here. I need some support. Anyways, niche market n all, so I hope you enjoy.

This takes place at the end of episode 3 after Philip got shot, so I've taken some liberties with the timeline (ironic, innit). There's a few extra hours in there, and I know he was awake when everyone was talking after they got back but this is fanfiction and I am God here so you just have to trust me. I wanna blow him so bad it hurts.

Philip was stable. Stable and asleep and breathing evenly on the table, thanks to Marcy. You could see his chest rising and falling out of the corner of your eye from where you were leaning against another table beside the medic, eyes fixed on the floor just in front of MacLaren’s pacing feet, idly picking at your bloodied hands. It was uncomfortably sticky as it dried, and beginning to crack and flake around the creases of your skin. It was going to be a pain to get off. 

No one was looking at MacLaren, you realised as you raised your head. Your team leader’s face was serious, dead serious, and you really couldn’t blame them for not wanting to meet that look. You kind of wished you hadn’t, and, as Marcy nudged your arm with her own, you realised that you had not heard a word of what he’d been saying with such gravity. 

“Sorry,” you muttered. “Come again?” 

He blew a breath out hard between his teeth, taking a step back and raising his eyes to the ceiling. “I was just asking,” he said slowly (oh, ok. So he was pissed pissed), “whether there was anything else anyone wanted to tell me.” 

“Oh, right. No.” 

MacLaren nodded. “Are you sure, (Y/N)?” 

“Yes.”

“Ok. Cause I don’t know and I do not want to know what the hell is going on between you two, but I want you to sort it out. Sooner rather than later.” 

“Yep,” you nodded, looking back at your hands. You had no doubt that “you two” was you and Philip, and it made you want to sink into a hole. You knew you hadn’t exactly been calm and rational when he’d been shot, how could you be? But it hadn’t been that bad. You’d done what Marcy had told you to. You hadn’t broken down or frozen and maybe there’d been a fair bit of whispered pleading with him to just hold on and just keep breathing, that it was only going to be a few more minutes and he just had to listen to me, keep squeezing my hand. But that had nothing to do with what was “going on” and more to do with the fact that he’d been bleeding out in your lap in the back of a van. Anyway, if you’d freaked out a little, that wasn’t MacLaren’s business. 

Marcy’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts. “Hey, Earth to (Y/N).” 

You sighed and offered her a small smile. “Yeah, sorry.” 

“It’s fine. I was just saying that I need to get back to David. Are you–?” 

“I’ll be fine,” you interrupted her, glancing at Philip. “I guess someone should stay with him anyway, huh?” 

A tiny crease appeared between her brows as she studied you, then nodded after a moment. “Yeah, might be a good idea. It was pretty straight forward, didn’t hit anything major, but still.” 

But still. It was still a bullet wound, and as mad at Philip as you were for dragging you all out there in the first place and getting himself shot, you didn’t want him to wake up alone and in pain and craving those goddamn drugs with no knowledge of whether he’d saved the boy, just that he’d killed the kidnappers. 

“What about you?” Marcy was saying, and if she hadn’t been using that measured, even tone she took when she was treating or assessing someone, you’d have said it was gentle. “Are you gonna be ok?” 

You shrugged. “I’m fine. I’m not the one that got shot.”

Another measured look, then she nodded and stepped back. “Alright. I didn’t want to put anything on the wound too fast, and it’s sealed for now, but it’ll need a dressing if he’s gonna be moving around or anything. Can you do that?” 

“Yeah. Yeah, I can do that.” 

She nodded again. “Don’t let him do anything stupid. And don’t do anything stupid yourself.” 

Despite the anger and residual panic still heavy in your stomach and the blood crusting your hands, you shot her a smile and waved. “Don’t worry, we’ll be fine.” You thought you saw her roll her eyes before the door clunked shut behind her, and you were alone.

You let out a slow breath, sagging further against the edge of the table. You had to wash your hands. You had to scrub Philip’s blood off your skin before it legitimately drove you insane. So, with a groan as your bruised knees protested the shift of weight into them (you probably didn’t have to drop and slide quite so hard to Philip’s side when he’d fallen. That, you could admit, had been excessive), you walked stiffly to the shitty sink and began scrubbing. 

Your skin was raw by the time the water finally ran clean, or at least not bloody, and while there may have been flecks of blood still hiding under your nails, your hands were cleaner than they had been in days. Maybe weeks. You really didn’t know if your host had washed them before she was supposed to die. 

You glanced over your shoulder as you dried your hands, wincing a little as the rough fabric of your jacket scraped against over-scrubbed knuckles. Philip hadn’t moved and was still breathing, which you were taking as a good sign. You crossed the room after a moment, gingerly lifting his shirt to peer at the spot on his stomach where the bullet had gone in. It was raw and red and far from pretty, but it wasn’t a gaping hole anymore. It wasn’t bleeding, even if it was still covered with blood. Sighing, you grabbed a pair of scissors from the kit Marcy had left lying open on the table, snipping neatly up the centre of the bloody shirt and pulling it (not uncaringly) from his shoulders. You didn’t let your eyes linger on the pale chest, the track marks in his arm, the faint chafing around his bicep. Instead, you turned away and walked quickly and quietly to the adjoining room where he slept, rifling through the pile of blankets and sheets and clothes and god knew what until you found a shirt that didn’t reek. 

You ran a clean corner of the ruined one under the tap, spongeing and wiping at the mottled russet stains on Philip’s skin until it was passably clean, the streaks of it on his face from your hands in the back of the van, then wrestled him (again, not too roughly) into the garment and stepped back. He could have been sleeping, really sleeping, instead of passed out from the drugs and blood loss and pain. Maybe you should move him. But then again, he was probably too heavy for this body to lift. Maybe not. 

He didn’t really look like himself when he was unconscious, you decided. Even in an unfamiliar body, there was something of the man you knew behind his eyes. You could recognise him past the strange face, make out your Philip in him when he was awake. Like this, with his eyes closed and his face slack, it wasn’t the same. It was like looking at a real, true, genuine stranger. A stranger who wasn't exactly bad to look at (in fact, you quite liked looking at him), but a stranger all the same.

Hesitantly, you raised a hand and brushed at a strand of hair hanging across his forehead. His skin wasn’t icily clammy as it had been in the van, but was still cool to the touch. Softer than you’d expected, though you didn’t really know what that was. You let your fingers trail across his forehead, smoothing a tiny wrinkle between his eyebrows, down over his cheek to his shoulder. You felt the expansion and contraction of his lungs through his body’s movement, regular and deep and alive and you knew what MacLaren meant. 

You and Philip were… complicated. That’s how anyone would describe you. He was too reckless, too hasty, felt too much too fast and didn’t think enough (and yes, you were aware of the irony there). And you understood, you really did. It was hard to look at it all objectively, and you couldn’t imagine how it must be to walk around with all that just floating around in your head. All those deaths, when they’d happen and where, and not be able to stop it. But you could also see the bigger picture. What you were doing was important. You had the protocols for a reason and the director for a reason and getting bogged down in the details and the individuals and the humanness of it only ever ended badly. Case in point. 

You really should have seen it coming, and now, in the aftermath, you wondered how you’d missed it. His disillusionment. The discomfort when you’d reminded him of the protocols. The discontent and grumbling and (very understandable and reasonable) grievances he’d raised around the whole protocol 3 thing. And you really did get it. It sucked, and the whole reason you were in this was to save people so why couldn’t you do just that? But at the end of the day, you also understood that you didn’t have all the information. Good things could lead to bad things. It might be superstition, but the butterfly effect was all too present in the forefront of your mind. 

And that was where you differed from Philip. He didn’t believe in “just letting someone die because someone else decided they’re not worth saving” (a recent and quite heated argument that still rang in your ears) and you… Well you wouldn’t say you did, but you didn’t not either. Maybe that determination and righteousness (“pig-headed”, you’d shouted at him not too long ago) was part of what drew you to Philip, too. It had never not been like that as far as you could remember, and so you butted heads. A lot. And as soon as you had one fight, one of you was rushing back to the other with an olive branch and you were both trying to not bash into each other so often and so hard, then before you knew it it was happening again. 

But this hadn’t been a fight. It hadn’t even been an argument. It had been Philip rushing into something his conscience told him was a good idea, lying to everyone else and dragging them all along and then getting shot and almost bleeding to death in your arms in the back of a van. You couldn’t even begin to imagine what you were going to say to him when he woke up.

Pull your head in.

What the fuck was that.

I’m so angry I could punch you.

I wish you’d told me. 

That was stupid.

Don’t ever do something like that again.

You almost died. 

You fucking idiot.

You fucking idiot, you almost died.

Don’t go and almost die ever again.

I don’t want you to die.

I can’t take it if you die.

You blinked, hot tears prickling in your eyes. Before you could even really think too much about it, you bent and pressed your lips to Philip’s cool forehead, straightening almost immediately.  You took a slow breath in, held it, released it with a hiss and set your shoulders. There was shit to be done besides hovering over him, and standing here waiting wasn’t going to make anything better. It was going to make you worse. 

“Ok,” you whispered, and turned away.

It couldn’t have been more than an hour when Philip stirred. A soft groan had you turning your head from the disassembled gun you were cleaning, watching as he tried to sit up, winced and lay back down. 

Maybe you should have started with a nice, simple, normal, “how are you feeling?” You supposed you could have at least smiled at him, even just nodded or raised your eyebrows. And you could admit that the snort had been a little out of line. Still. You’d been festering – that was the only way you could describe how the last vestiges of panic and adrenaline had cooled and settled low in your gut, right beside the simmering anger that just refused to go away. No matter how much you told yourself to cut him some slack and just wait until he was actually awake to hear his side of it. Don’t do anything stupid, Marcy had said, and you were determined to abide by that. 

“What…?” he started, then groaned. “(Y/N)?” 

“Yep.” 

Another groan, and this time you raised your head. He’d swung his legs over the side and had managed to sit up, breathing heavily and gripping the edge of the table so hard his knuckles were white. As you watched, he pulled up the bottom of his shirt and frowned at the spot where the bullet had gone in. It didn’t really look like a gunshot anymore, thanks to Marcy’s attention, but there was definitely some bruising around the edges.

“Marcy said to put something on it if you’re gonna be… doing stuff,” you said. 

He looked up, dropping the shirt and eyeing you warily. “Ok.” He turned, reaching towards the open kit at the end of the bench, face tight with pain. It scraped along the rough surface as he dragged it closer, the scissors you’d left resting on top of everything sliding out and onto the floor with a clatter. Philip paused, glanced at you, then kept pulling. 

“For fuck’s sake,” you muttered, slamming down the gun in your hand and crossing quickly to him. You slapped the scissors back on the bench, turning the kit to face yourself and rifling through the neatly compartmentalised packets of first aid supplies until you found a wound pad that looked big enough. 

“Up,” you said, gesturing to his shirt as you withdrew a roll of tape. Then, with a ‘turn around’ motion, “down.” 

He got the idea, swinging his legs back onto the table and lying flat, watching as you tore open the packet and laid the pad against his skin, placed his hand over it with a simple command to “hold it” and cut a piece of tape. He drew in a sharp breath as you smoothed the tape down the edge of the pad, perhaps a little harder than you’d meant, and you paused. 

“It’s still…” He trailed off, looking away. 

“Sorry.” You were gentler this time, glancing up at him as you stuck down the dressing. You may have been pissed, but actually hurting him was the last thing you wanted to do. It wasn’t as neat as you’d seen Marcy do it, but it was functional. That was what mattered. You lingered a moment, scissors and tape in one hand, the other resting gently by the slightly puffy white square. He’d warmed up, here at least, which you supposed was a good thing. 

“(Y/N),” he started, and you quickly withdrew your hand. You were still angry at him, no matter what else was now causing that deep, tight feeling inside you. Like someone was pulling on a string attached to the very centre of your being, right behind your sternum. 

“How’s that?” you asked as you stepped back, crossing your arms. 

“It’s fine, but–” 

“Good.” You turned away, stalking back to the guns on the table before he had a chance to finish. He groaned again as you sat down, not out of pain this time. And ok, you could definitely have been nicer about it all, but you were determined not to be the one to take the first step. He’d gotten himself and everyone else into this bullshit, he could at least be the one to bring it up. 

“How long was I out?” 

“An hour. Give or take.”

“The others…?” A soft grunt, the rustle of fabric and the sound of feet hitting the floor.

“Gone.” 

There was a pause, a few hesitant footsteps, and when he spoke again his voice was much closer. “Not you?” 

You didn’t look up as you grabbed another gun and began the smooth, practised movements of dismantling it. “I’m sitting here, aren’t I?”

He gave a noncommittal little hum, and this time you did raise your eyes. He was leaning against the end of your table, watching you. It may have just been the dimness of the room, or the clouded haze of thoughts and feelings swirling in your own head, but there was something in his face that you couldn’t quite pin down. That wasn’t usually a problem with Philip, he was the kind of person who you could always tell where his mind was. And he always knew yours. 

You sighed and leaned back in your chair, folding your arms across your chest once more as you swivelled to face him. “What is it?” 

“Nothing,” he shrugged, his brows pinching together and his arm tensing as the movement tugged at his wound. He cursed softly and glanced down. 

“Are you in pain?” 

His eyebrows rose incredulously. Ok, yeah, dumb question. Of course he was in pain. You’d be more concerned if he wasn’t. Wordlessly, you rose and crossed to the first aid kit again, withdrawing an almost empty packet of painkillers. You handed them to him as you sat down, and didn’t watch him swallow two. You just heard it. 

The silence stretched between you, the occasional clunk of the guns and the quiet ticking of the clock the only sounds in the building. Outside, someone was shouting and the traffic roared. 

After what felt like ten minutes but was probably only two, Philip blew out a breath and shifted. “Ok, just… spit it out,” he said. “What’s wrong?” 

Wow, ok. That was a loaded question if you’d ever heard one. You stopped what you were doing, cooley and slowly placing the gun you’d been about to slide apart onto the table almost soundlessly. “What’s wrong?” you echoed, turning to face him. 

He either didn’t notice or didn’t care about the frost you couldn’t have kept out of your voice if you'd tried. “Yeah, cause something clearly is.” 

God, where did you even start? He’d lied to you. He’d gone directly against protocol, protocol that could be stupid but was ultimately there to protect you and everyone else. He still hadn’t even actually addressed any of it. Hadn’t checked if you were alright, hadn’t checked if anyone else had been hurt (and ok, you couldn’t really blame him for that, but that was besides the point.) In the end, you decided on starting with the elephant in the room. “You almost died.” 

He opened his mouth, closed it again. Looked away, back to you. “I didn’t.” 

You shook your head. That wasn’t the point. “You could have.” 

“And?” 

Now it was your turn to open your mouth, only to find no words. You floundered for a second, then, “And? And? Philip what the fuck do you mean and?” 

“It’s not like people aren’t dying every day, huh?” He pushed off the table, standing up straight and tapping the side of his head. “Huh, (Y/N)? You get this worked up about them too?” 

You shook your head, rising from the chair so fast it skidded backwards. “That’s different. You know it is.” 

“Oh, so now you’re–” 

“This is not about that.” The words were tight, forced between your teeth as you stepped around the corner of the table to face him. “This is about the fact that what you did was reckless and stupid and you got shot.” You lifted a hand, poking him squarely in the chest hard enough that he swayed. “What part of that is not getting through your head?”

“He was a kid, (Y/N)! A little kid! You saw the place, they’d already killed one. How can you just sit and let that shit happen?” 

“It’s not our place, Philip. Bad things happen every day. People die. We wouldn’t be here right now if people didn’t die! I know you're–” 

He didn’t let you finish. “You don’t. You don’t get it. If you knew, you wouldn’t be standing there saying what you’re saying. You’d be on my side.”

“Your side?” You raised your eyebrows, incredulous. “There isn’t a your side and a my side. We’re trying to do the same thing! We’re a team, for fuck’s sake!” 

“Well you sure as hell don’t act like it.” 

“Oh my fucking God.” You could have screamed. You’d really wanted to avoid this. Hadn’t wanted to get into a shouting match when he probably wasn’t even supposed to be walking around, no matter how many dressings you taped onto his stomach or how many painkillers he downed. “You’re being insanely stupid. Insanely fucking stupid.” 

“At least I stopped a kid from dying.” 

You slammed your hand down on the table so hard it went numb, then burned all the way up your wrist. You ignored it. But still, even through the haze of anger and whatever else, you recognised the words for what they were. He was trying to confirm that he actually had managed to save Aleksander. As pissed as you were, you weren't cruel enough to leave that unanswered. “Ok, fine, you did. He's being reunited with his mother and they're riding off into the sunset and they're gonna live happily ever after. But you could have died, Philip! How many times do I have to say that?” 

You didn't miss the tiny flash of relief  — or something close to it — at your words. “This shit isn’t exactly risk free. Do you know how many others die on missions?” 

“I don’t care.” There were tears in your eyes now, hot and prickling and you couldn’t even care enough to wipe them away. “You were bleeding out on top of me in the back of the van. And it could have been any one of us, too! What if it’d been Trevor? MacLaren? Carly? What if Marcy had taken that bullet and fucking kicked it, huh? Where would that leave us?” 

He hadn’t stepped back as you’d pressed closer, and for a moment you wondered if this was it. If you should just walk away now before either one of you did some real damage. Then he swallowed, Adam’s apple bobbing. “Guess it’s lucky it was me, then.” 

You half stifled your sob (an actual sob, which you were not proud of), raising your hand again to slam into his chest, press to your face, run through your hair. “What can’t you understand? Why can’t you understand?” 

His own hand moved, slowly and hesitantly towards your arm. He paused and thought better of it before it got past waist height, searching your face. “What’s this really about?” 

“I…” You stopped, breathing hard. He was right. It wasn’t just that he’d lied about the messengers or dragged you all on an unsanctioned and ill-prepared mission. It was more than that. It was, when you got down to it, his head in your lap in the back of the van. His blood coating you. His hand in yours. His eyes unfocussed, his breathing too shallow and the possibility that that was the last time you’d ever get to see him. When you spoke, each word felt like you were vomiting up a bowling ball. 

“I don’t want to do this without you.” 

There was a pause, then, “Fuck. Fuck, (Y/N).” And his arm was moving again, his hand coming to rest behind your head, and before you even realised what was happening his lips were pressed against yours.

It only took you a moment to melt into him, to step that little bit closer and tilt your face towards his, your hands settling on his chest between the two of you, fingers twisting in the material of his shirt as his tangled in your hair. He kissed you like you belonged to him, like he wanted you to be his and his alone. A tiny, involuntary sound slipped from you as his tongue slid between your parted lips, searching and exploring your mouth like you’d been dreaming of doing to him for far too long now. You pushed back against him, sliding your hand up to caress his neck, brushing over the stubble littering his jaw and cheek. The hand that wasn’t in your hair had settled on your waist, pulling your body flush with his, fingers digging into your flesh enough to send heat coursing through your whole being.

You moaned softly, your hold on the back of his neck tightening ever so slightly as you pulled him down further towards you. He was growing hard against you, you could feel it, his own choked hum of pleasure reverberating against your mouth as you moved your hips. You did it again, and this time it was a sharp breath sucked through his nose.

And God, you wanted him. You wanted him so badly it almost hurt, but as soon as you had the thought another one rang through your mind like an alarm through a good dream. You relaxed your hold on him, drawing back even as he chased your lips. 

“Protocol 4,” you murmured, the tears that had slipped from your eyes already crusting dry on your cheeks.  

“We’re not reproducing.”

You raised an eyebrow, glancing down to where his hips pressed against your own. You watched his hand move from your waist, down over the front of your hip to where your leg joined it. Your stomach swooped, desire pooling low in you as his fingers traced over your inner thigh, soft and teasing.

“Fuck you,” you whispered, your hands already back in his shirt and pulling him to you, lips crashing against his once more. 

He gave a little grunt of surprise, the hand that had stayed close to your hair sliding back into it. But you were moving now, turning and sweeping one hand across the table behind you before jumping up onto it, parting your legs for Philip. He fit perfectly between your thighs, his hardness now flush with your clothed core in a way that had you arching shamelessly into him. His hand trailed down your neck, over your shoulder and down over your ribs, your waist, fingers curving there once more and pulling you closer. You didn’t think you could get any closer, but you needed to feel his skin on yours, touch him and have him touch you. You could feel his heartbeat through his shirt where your chest pressed against his, but it wasn’t enough. You needed all of him. 

You managed to wriggle your hand into the tiny space between your bodies, fingers searching for the hem of his shirt and pushing unceremoniously under it. You had your tongue in his mouth now too, stroking and tasting every inch of him just as he’d done to you, and this time you were sure your lips were going to be bruised. Somewhere between your hand on his skin and his shirt being bunched up to his chest, Philip got the hint and broke away just long enough to shrug it off, dropping the piece of fabric on the table beside you. 

“Tell me you changed that,” he said, voice low. 

You nodded. “I threw the other one out.” 

“Mhm.” 

“It was so bloody it was starting to go stiff.” 

“God, just stop talking.” 

You smiled at that, and this time when he kissed you it was less… urgent. Still thorough and firm, still fraught with want and need, but less like a man starved and more like a man who was determined to enjoy a good meal. And hey, you were more than happy to provide that. You were barely sitting on the table anymore, your own wriggling and Philip’s hold on your waist to blame for the edge of it digging into your ass. 

Without his shirt, there wasn’t anything for you to tug Philip by as you shifted backwards. He hummed softly when your hands slid up his bare chest, over his shoulders, pulling at him to come closer, come here. He stumbled a little as he leaned against the table, his own hand moving smoothly from its place on your waist down over your hip, along your thigh to your knee and back up again. You lifted the leg slightly, hooking it behind him and squeezing. There wasn’t much muscle to work with, not what you were used to anyway, but his breath still hitched in his chest as you did it again. 

His hands were firm on your legs as he broke from your lips, staring at you with that same look you couldn’t quite pin down. Gently, you moved your hand up over his neck, fingers tangling in his hair as you cradled the base of his skull. It was so different to how you’d held him in the back of the van, your fingers leaving bloody stripes across his cheeks and neck and forehead, his gaze unfocussed and wandering until his eyes had just closed and you hadn’t been able to get him to look at anything, much less you. But somehow, it was the same. It was still Philip, warm and conscious and standing between your legs, face clean and eyes clear, lips kiss-swollen and just begging to be touched. 

You swallowed, tearing your eyes away from his mouth and curling your fingers in his hair as you ground your hips into his. A muscle in his jaw twitched, his grip tightening on your thighs, his face still only inches from your own. His eyes, as they flicked down to your mouth, were dark with want. 

“God, (Y/N),” he whispered as you did it again, your lips curling into a smile. He bent his head, breath warm against your neck as he kissed under your jaw, down the muscle at the side of your neck, sucking gently at the spot. 

“Philip,” you sighed as he did it again, harder this time. Fuck, you hoped he left a mark. You cursed as the thought that that was probably a bad idea hit you, pulling gently at his hair to raise his head.

“Is that…?” he frowned, uncertain. 

“No, no I like that. A lot. I just…” You stopped, reaching for the hem of your shirt and pulling it up over your head, dropping it beside his. “I think here is better?” you offered, pointing to your chest. 

“Oh, ok.” His smile was quick as he bent once more, overtaken by a wince as it pulled at his side. 

“Are you alright?” you asked quickly, ducking your head to meet his eyes. 

“Fine,” he said tightly, leaning forwards once more. 

“No, wait a second. You got shot, Philip. You’re not… Jesus, I don’t know if we should even be doing this.” 

A pause as he searched your face. “I want to. I want you, (Y/N), if you want me.” 

“I do. I really, really do. But I don’t want to hurt you.” 

The corner of his mouth twitched into a small smile. “You won’t.” 

“You’ll tell me if I do?” 

“You won’t.” 

You huffed and crossed your arms, covering your chest. “Promise.” 

“Ok, fine,” he sighed. “I promise I’ll tell you if you hurt me.”

“Ok.” You smiled again as you closed the little distance between you, unfolding your arms to run your hands over his chest. “Bed,” you murmured against his lips. Then, when you felt him hesitate, “it’s better than the table.” 

He barely pulled away, even as you slipped from your perch and followed him to the door in the corner, through the mess you’d rifled through earlier and towards the bed. You turned, pushing him gently onto the edge of it, your hand resuming its place in his hair as you bent to kiss him again. His own hand had settled once more on your waist, and as you licked lightly at his bottom lip it slid up your side, hovering over your ribs. His thumb skimmed the skin just shy of your breast, where your bra sat, and you smiled even as you mapped the inside of his mouth with your tongue.

“Off,” you muttered, still kissing him as he undid the clasp behind your back (albeit with a little difficulty) and slid the piece of fabric from your shoulders. You raised your free hand, placing it over his and moving it those last few inches to your breast, squeezing your fingers over his. He drew a sharp breath and you squeezed your own breast for him again before dropping your hand to cup his jaw. You tilted his head gently further upwards, stepping between his legs as his thumb swiped an arc over your skin. Then he squeezed – just as gently as ever – and you let a moan slip from you. He took that as encouragement, pulling you even closer with his free hand as he moved, kneading the soft flesh, moving his hand until his finger brushed over your nipple and you half moaned, half gasped against his mouth. 

He paused, then when you pushed harder against him did it again. You whispered a breathy “yes,” hardly drawing back at all before you were sinking to your knees between his, Philip following until he couldn’t, simply staring at you. 

“What are you doing?” 

Oh, you liked the view from here. You smiled as his fingers spread over your jaw, turning your face to place a kiss on the palm of his hand as you slid your own up his thighs. You paused when you reached his hips, nodding to the now very noticeable bulge in his pants. “Can I?” 

You thought there might have been a faint flush dusting his face, but it was really too dim to tell. Either way, he nodded and watched as you undid his pants, lifting his hips as you pulled them down to pool around his ankles. His cock strained against his underwear, and your mouth watered as you looked up at him. His cheeks were definitely pinker than usual, his throat bobbing as he swallowed, not looking away even as you removed the last piece of clothing between you. 

“Fuck, Philip,” you breathed, glancing from his face to his dick and back again. 

He frowned, unsure. “What?”

You grinned. “I can’t wait to put that in my mouth.” 

His thigh tensed under your hand, breath hitching in his chest. “Jesus, (Y/N), you can’t just say shit like that.” 

“What?” you asked, bending forwards to place a kiss on his stomach, your thumb moving in slow circles on his skin. “That I’m gonna take you until I choke? That I’m gonna ride you so hard you’ll see stars, let you fill me up and fuck me six ways into next week?” 

Before you could look up again, his hand was under your chin and he was raising your face for you, fingers careful where they gripped your jaw. “You have no idea what you’re doing to me,” he said softly. 

You raised an eyebrow, finally reaching out and gently taking hold of his cock. “Don’t I?” you asked as you moved your hand, want surging hot through your whole body as he moaned low and deep. You shifted closer still, settling yourself between his legs before you bent your head and kissed the tip of his dick, licked it, relishing in Philip’s quick hiss of breath. 

“Oh fuck,” he gasped as you sank your mouth over him, heavy and hot and already salty with precum. “Oh, fuck, (Y/N).” 

You drew back, glancing up at him. Holy shit you never wanted to forget the look on his face – pure want, and directed entirely at you. “Ok?” you asked. 

He nodded quickly. “Yeah. Shit, ‘s more than ok.” 

“Good,” you smiled, licking a long stripe up his shaft and sliding your lips over the head once more, tongue soft and pliant against him. Your hand worked what wouldn’t fit in your mouth, slow strokes to match the slow bobbing of your head.

His stomach twitched as you hollowed your cheeks, another groan reverberating through his chest. You’d wanted to be gentle with him despite what you’d said, and were all too aware that he was still injured and maybe this had been what Marcy had meant when she’d told you not to do anything stupid. Not to let him do anything stupid. Well, it was too late now. What the medic didn’t know wouldn’t hurt her, or anyone else. 

You snuck another glance at Philip, the sight that met you sending a fresh bolt of heat shooting down your spine to pool between your legs. His head was tipped back, neck and jaw barred to you, his nose ring glinting in the dim light, chest heaving and hands tight where they gripped the sheets. You wanted to memorise him, here in this moment, and never let it go. You clenched your thighs, shifting in your search for a little friction, any relief at all. 

Philip cursed softly, teeth sinking into his bottom lip as he lowered his head to look down at you. “You’re so fucking hot,” he breathed, one hand trailing over your upper arm, your shoulder, weaving through your hair. He didn’t pull it, as such, but the pressure and the praise together was enough to make you moan around his cock. His hips jerked with the sound, fingers tightening and a muttered “fuck,” slipping from his lips. 

“Hm?” You didn’t stop, eyes watering as you sped up your movements, his dick slick with your spit and only getting messier. Maybe with anyone else it would have been gross, but not with him. Never with him. His hips bucked up again, followed by a quickly gasped apology and a loosening of the grip on your hair. You rubbed your free hand over his thigh, squeezing gently. It’s ok, it said. I’m fine. Then, as you squeezed his cock and relaxed your throat even further, please. 

“Yes,” he gasped. “Please, (Y/N), that’s—”

You hummed again, pulling your head back and sucking at just the tip, tongue flicking over the sensitive slit across it. He cursed again, loudly, your name falling from his lips once more. He thrust up into your mouth, hard enough that your eyes watered and you wondered if you were going to gag. You hoped not. 

“Don’t stop,” he practically pleaded. “Shit, don’t stop.” 

You wouldn’t dream of it. You sped up again, sucking hard and sagging over him, mapping every inch of his cock, every ridge and vein and sensitive spot. God, you could stay here forever, the warm weight of him in your mouth and his hand in your hair, listening to his moans and grunts and uneven breaths. 

“I’m— shit, fuck, fuck, (Y/N) I’m so fucking close.” 

That sent a thrill through you, the wet heat between your legs almost unbearable now. You took him deep, a gentle squeeze to his thigh the only reassurance and confirmation you could offer as you looked up, your vision slightly blurry, blinking rapidly to clear it. There was no way you were going to miss this. 

Then he was groaning deeply, hand tightening in your hair and head thrown back, dick twitching in your mouth as he spilled hot and thick down your throat. His chest heaved as he said your name like a prayer, repeating it over and over again until it blurred into one sound. How many times had you wondered what he’d sound like? What he’d taste like? What he’d look like here, like this? It was better than anything your mind could ever conjure. 

You swallowed, slowing your movements as he rode out the high, only drawing back when his breathing had slowed and he’d ceased trembling. You licked over him gently, cleaning up the worst of the mess of spit and cum, wiping the corners of your mouth delicately. You sat between his legs, tracing little arcs over his skin with your thumb. 

“Alright?” you asked softly. 

He took a long, shuddering breath and looked down at you, nodding. “Are you?” 

“Yeah,” you smiled. You pressed your cheek into his palm as he slid the hand that had been gripping your hair down over your face, turning quickly to kiss it. 

His brows creased, and he paused. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?” 

You shook your head, rising on stiff legs and taking his face between your hands. “You could never,” you said softly. Then a thought occurred to you. “It wasn’t… too much?” 

He huffed a laugh at that, shaking his head. “No. You were great. Better than great.” 

“Mm, good.” You smiled as he raised his hand to cup the back of your neck, pulling you towards him and into a gentle kiss. 

“Off,” he murmured against your lips, free hand running along the waistband of your pants. 

“Magic word?” 

He just rolled his eyes. “Please.” 

“Say it again,” you grinned. 

This time he paused, drawing back ever so slightly, searching your face. 

You just shrugged. “They’re not coming off if you don’t ask me nicely.” 

His hand dropped from your neck, skimming over your chest and stomach to rest on your hip. He held your gaze as he leaned closer, large hands firm and warm against you, then dropped his eyes to your skin as his lips met your stomach. You felt your insides turn over as he kissed you there, your teeth digging into your bottom lip hard enough that it almost hurt. 

“Philip,” you started, then hissed as he did again, his tongue soft and hot where it touched you – so quickly you wondered if he’d even meant to do it. But no, there it was again, the sensation sending more electric heat shooting through you. You moaned outright when he sucked at the spot, hand flying to his hair, fingers curling in it. God, you’d never get tired of that, and from the way he hummed against your stomach neither would he. 

“Philip,” you breathed again. “Philip, that’s not asking nicely.” 

He glanced up at you, and you could have come undone from that alone. His tongue darted out over his lips. “Then can I please take off your pants?”

Oh you really didn’t want to give in that easily. A few kisses and half a hickey on your stomach and you were caving? Really? But then he was whispering “please” and his breath was raising gooseflesh all over you and you were tingling all over and his voice was so soft and husky like this and–

“Yes.” 

“Yes?” he echoed, frozen as he waited. 

“Yes, Philip. Sí, ja, oui, just—” Your breath caught as he pulled you close before releasing your hips, making quick work of your fly and easing your pants down over your hips. Your underwear followed suit, pooling around your ankles before you kicked both pieces of clothing off to the side and stood, completely bare, between Philip’s legs. 

“God, (Y/N),” he murmured almost reverently, stroking down over your hips and thighs, around behind your knees and up to your ass. And wow that did something to you.

 “Can I?” You motioned to his lap, already bending your knee at the edge of the mattress. 

Philip nodded quickly, already inching backwards to make room for you on the bed. “Yeah, yeah. Go ahead.”

You smiled, bringing your lips to his for what had to be the millionth time as you straddled his thighs and draped your arms around his shoulders, his lips parting easily under yours, his tongue dancing alongside your own as if he’d been born to kiss you. 

“I wanna touch you,” he said softly into the space between your mouths. He was all over you, kissing along your jaw and neck and under your ear, touching your back and sides and legs and hips and ass, pressing flush against you. The only part of you that hadn’t touched him yet was, ironically, where you wanted him most. 

“Please,” you replied almost immediately. “I want you to.” 

A breath of laughter hushed over your chest as he ran his hand up over the top of your thigh, along the spot where it joined your hip, tantalisingly close to the throbbing heat between your legs. You bit your lip, watching his face as his fingers crept ever closer. 

“Philip,” you warned. 

“Hm?” 

“Stop teasing.” 

“I’m not, I’m just… taking my time.” 

“Well— fuck.” The word was torn from you as his hand moved that last tiny distance, fingers sliding easily through your wetness. 

“Jesus, (Y/N),” be breathed. “You’re…” 

“Really fucking wet?” you suggested, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, that’s one way to put it. I didn’t…” He trailed off, shaking his head. “Didn’t think I did anything that special.” 

You snorted, shifting closer still. “It’s you, Philip. I just really, really, really, want you.” 

He stilled for a moment, studying you like he was trying to memorise every cell making up your face. Then he stretched up and kissed you, stifling your moan with his lips as his finger slid over your clit. He did it again, a small, precise movement that had you grinding against his fingers as your own tightening on his shoulders. 

“There?” he asked, barely breaking away from you. 

“Oh God, yes. Yes, right there.” 

His eyes didn’t leave your face as he circled your clit, your breathing ragged and your body arching into his of its own accord. You bit your lip hard enough that it hurt, trying desperately to stifle another embarrassingly desperate moan. God, how was he so good at this? 

“Don’t do that,” he muttered, leaning forward to kiss along your collarbone. 

“What?” 

“Try to be quiet. I wanna hear you, wanna hear everything.” 

“Shit, Philip,” you panted. 

“Ok?”

“Ok. Ok, I— fuck.” He’d sucked hard at a spot on your chest, the faint pain cutting through the sharp pleasure spiralling from his hand. “Fuck,” you whispered again, your own hand flying to his hair as you scrambled for purchase. 

“Mhm, that’s it.”

You felt the praise, something about the quiet huskiness of his voice and the way he gripped your hip making you squirm. “Philip please,” you gasped. “Please.” 

“Please what?” 

“I want you inside me. I need you inside me, now.” 

He cursed, fingers leaving your clit to circle your entrance, almost tentative. Double checking. 

You shook your head. “No, that’s not what I mean.” 

He frowned, raising his head. 

You let go of his hair, brushing a stray piece from his forehead as you slid your other hand down his front. You glanced at the tiny remaining space where his cock sat, hard again between you. You spat into your palm before wrapping your hand gently around it, moving your fist slowly. “I mean here, Philip.” 

“Oh.” He swallowed hard, searching your face. “Are you sure?” 

“Mhm. I’m sure. Are you?” 

“Yes,” he breathed. “Fuck yes, I’m sure. Just—” He pulled away, reaching for the overcrowded nightstand (which, now you were looking at it, you were pretty sure was just a small filing cabinet) and rifling through the first one. When that didn’t turn up anything, he reached for the second. 

“What’re you looking for?” you asked as he moved on to the third. 

“Condom,” he grunted, then withdrew his hand triumphantly to show you a square of faded red foil. 

“Jesus, how’d you know that was gonna be there?” 

He shrugged. “Seemed like the kind of place to put one.” 

“Yeah. Yeah, ok.” 

“Ok?” 

“Mhm.” You surveyed the package as he opened it, placing the foil pieces on the filing cabinet. “They don’t just… stop working, do they? If they’re a bit old?” 

He frowned. “Don’t think so. It’s only a month out of date, anyway. Less, actually. And it wasn’t open.” He looked up, meeting your eyes. “We could get more?” 

“No, no it’s ok. I trust you.” 

“Trust Trojan.” 

“Fine, I trust Trojan.” 

He chuckled softly, shaking his head as he rolled the piece of latex over himself. The dressing on his side gleamed eerily in the dimness, and you silently cursed yourself. How had you not thought of that?

“Is that gonna be alright?” you asked, gesturing to it. 

Gingerly, he ran a finger of it. “I think so.” Then, as if it explained everything, “Painkillers.” 

“Ok, just—” 

“Let you know if it hurts,” he interrupted. “I will.” 

You rolled your eyes as you lifted your hips, bracing yourself on his shoulders. “Alright. Ready?” At his nod, you sank down slowly onto him, pausing as you adjusted to the stretch.

“You ok?” he asked, breath unsteady, grip firm around your waist. 

“Yeah,” you breathed. “Gimme a second.” A soft moan slipped from you as you lowered yourself the rest of the way down, glancing at Philip. “This ok?” 

His throat bobbed as he swallowed, eyes dark, lips parted. “Uh-huh. You?” 

“Yeah. Can I move?” 

“Yes. Please, (Y/N), you can—” He broke off with a groan as you rocked your hips over his, slowly at first, finding your rhythm. It may have been a little tight initially, but now as you moved atop him you slid easily, Philip’s uneven breath and your own soft moans mingling in the space between your faces. 

“Fuck,” you panted. “Fuck, Philip you feel fucking amazing.” 

“(Y/N), oh, you— you feel amazing.” 

You brought your lips to his, messy and uncoordinated and hardly a kiss by any stringent definition. You moaned into his mouth as you took him deep inside you, the delicious friction of his cock lighting every inch of your insides on fire. You needed him, needed to go harder and faster and—

“Harder?” he half asked, half offered. It was like he’d read your mind. 

“Yes,” you whispered, lifting and lowering your hips with a little more of the desperation filtering through every fibre of your being. 

“Oh, yes, fuck yes—” His hips jerked up into yours, hands almost rough on your hips as he guided your movements. “Used to dream about this,” he confessed to your neck. “Having you like this.” 

Oh shit. You hadn’t been expecting that. “Yeah?” 

“Yeah. What you’d look like. Sound like. What you’d— ah— feel like.” 

“What do I feel like?” you breathed, then cursed loudly as he reached down between your bodies and rubbed at your clit. 

“Like Heaven. You feel like Heaven, (Y/N), I—” 

You cut him off, tilting his face to yours and kissing him so hard you thought he was about to overbalance. But he held you tight, lips and teeth and tongue clashing against yours, swallowing your increasingly desperate moans and whines — because yes, you’d gotten to the point where you were almost whimpering. 

“Philip,” you practically sobbed, pleasure coiling tight and hot and hard with every push of his cock inside you, every movement of his finger on your clit. “Philip fuck don’t stop—” 

“Yeah, no, shit (Y/N), keep doing that.” 

“I’m gonna cum,” you managed. “Fuck, fuck, I’m gonna fucking cum—” 

“Me too, you’re gonna— again—” 

“Yeah, Jesus Christ 33— Philip—” And then you were crying his name over and over, white hot bliss flooding out through your body, back arching and legs spasming as Philip continued to move you. You were vaguely aware of his arms tightening around your waist and his face pressing into your neck, his chest heaving against your own, your name and what you thought might have been your number  — both familiar and strange and so deeply tied to home it almost shocked you — mixed with his deep groans as he too climaxed. You hovered, wrapped tightly in each other’s arms, breathing heavily as the aftershocks faded from trembling limbs and your heartbeats slowed to normal. 

After what felt like an age, you turned your head and kissed Philip’s temple, combing your fingers gently through his hair. He hummed appreciatively, raising his head from where his spit and your own sweat mingled at the joining of your neck and shoulder. He rubbed the spot softly, placed a featherlight kiss there and drew back to look at you. 

“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that,” he murmured. 

You smiled. “Mm, I think I have some.” 

His laugh was little more than a huff of air. He shook his head and he lifted you carefully off his lap, turning on the tiny mattress and pulling you close. You frowned at the sudden empty feeling inside you, but then he was tying shut the condom and dropping it on the nightstand, wrapping his arm around you and wriggling impossibly closer. You slid your hand up over his side, pausing when your fingers brushed the tape you’d used on the dressing. You were tempted to check it, make sure you hadn’t disturbed the wound at all — you’d never hear the end of that from Marcy. 

You drew back just enough that Philip’s face came into focus, cheeks still faintly flushed, nose ring gleaming dully. He was already looking at you, his thumb moving in tiny half circles on your back, something close to awe shining in his eyes. 

“What?” you asked, smiling. 

“Nothing.” 

“Come on. What’s going on in that super brain of yours?” 

“Super brain?” 

“Yeah. Your big historian super brain.” 

His lips twitched up into a smile, soft and a little confused and all for you. “Not much,” he replied. “You, mainly.” 

“Wow, ok.” You snorted, relaxing your neck and letting your face fall against his chest. He didn’t exactly smell nice, but something about it was incredibly comforting. There was that little breath of laughter again, his body moving with it and jiggling you. 

“At least now I know you think I’m smart,” he said. 

“Of course I think you’re smart. I think you’re a goddamn genius. The things you think of…” You trailed off, shaking your head. When you continued, it was in a whisper. “I think you’re amazing.” 

He stilled, and for a moment you wondered if you’d said the wrong thing. Then, “I think you’re amazing, too.” 

You lifted your head again, stretching up to brush his lips with yours. You shifted, but groaned as your thighs rubbed together. Your wetness was cooling between them, uncomfortable and slimy now that you weren’t moving with Philip anymore. 

“I’m gonna clean us up,” you said softly, already drawing away. 

“(Y/N), wait a second—” 

You turned as he caught your wrist, watched him sit up with a faint wince. “What?” 

“Nothing just…” He shrugged, still watching you.

You smiled, reaching up under his chin with your free hand as you stepped closer. You leaned down, and this time when you kissed him it was soft and tender and slow and careful. His lips parted, his hand still gently holding your wrist as he kissed you back with just as much care and deliberation. You could have stayed there forever, tongues and lips locked in a slow sort of dance. But the air was cooler when you stood, and the mess between your thighs really was uncomfortable. 

“I’ll be back,” you whispered as you drew away. 

He just nodded, eyes following your every movement as you swiped the used condom and wrapper, wrapped yourself in a blanket and stepped out into the main area. You were quick to find a towel, wet it, wipe yourself down, dispose of your rubbish inside an empty chip packet and pad back into the bedroom. 

You slid onto the edge of the bed, glancing to Philip for permission before gently cleaning around his crotch. You wished there was a shower. You just wanted to stand under a flow of hot water (one of the things you’d been looking forward to most about the 21st century), maybe with the man currently watching you like you’d personally hung the stars, and not think about anything. 

“Still just thinking about me?” you asked, half joking, as you dropped the towel over the edge of the bed and draped yourself along Philip’s side. You could hear his heart directly under your cheek, feel the expansion and contraction of his ribs on your front. You shifted closer and hooked your leg over his. 

“Mm, pretty much.” 

“What else?” 

He paused, then, “Did you almost call me 3326?” 

It was your turn to hesitate. “Maybe. Almost.” 

“Thought so. Wasn’t sure if I was just hearing things.” 

You looked up, frowning. “You hear things a lot?” 

He just shrugged, then muttered an apology as you moved with his shoulder. “A bit, yeah.” 

“Ok.” You weren’t sure what to do with that information, so you just turned your face and kissed his chest. “I could have sworn I heard you call me 3430.” 

“Maybe.” You could practically hear the smile in his voice. “Maybe you’re hearing things too.” 

“Maybe, Philip, but I don’t think so. Leave the future in the past.” 

“Yeah,” he sighed. “I know.” 

You squeezed him gently, and his arm tightened around you momentarily in response. You could get used to this, you thought as you closed your eyes. Your body was so heavy, and Philip was actually warm now. Warm and firm and real and very very comforting. “Can I stay?” you whispered. “Here? With you?” 

When he answered, his voice was just as soft as your own. “Yes. I don’t want you to go.”

“Mm, I’m not going.” 

He stroked your shoulder, the movement almost hypnotic. “Good.” You were vaguely aware of his arm moving, then something thick and a little itchy was being dragged over your bare body and his other arm was coming to rest over your waist, hand heavy and so warm on your back. The last thing you were aware of was the faint brush of stubble and a kiss on your forehead.

Note: obviously don’t use expired condoms that’s stupid. Anyways I binge read acotar like a few weeks ago and I genuinely think my writing skills have gone downhill because this is NOWHERE NEAR some of my other stuff. Not to toot my own horn and like I know I'm not the most amazing writer in the world but I am usually decent as far as smut goes. This is not on the same level. Also I had no idea how to address the host thing or the names thing or the numbers thing so I chose to simply mention it and hope for the best. I apologise (there really isn't much about this show floating around, huh). Also I'm only just realising this is weirdly similar in a lot of ways to my Ethan Hunt x reader one, but I really like this specific trope so yeah... deal with it lol

[rayrayor]

Hey Kat! @mybrainismelted

Here is Drabble challenge 34 , as asked.

“ You work for me. you are my slave “

Please note, GILF ( Ginger I’d Like to F@*k )

Ian was finally home after ten years in the military, two Purple Hearts, and a Medal of Honor. Gnarly chest scars and nightmares about the brothers he could not save. He was not ready to go into EMT work yet but needed routine.

Mandy Milkovich. Bestie and Beard since freshman year. Flew out to Walter Reed and held his hand, making sure he wanted to still live. Now a regular at his and Carl's apartment. Her brothers owned Kings of the Southside Ink and her brother Mickey, the star tattooist, temperamental shit and hot beyond the dirty, angry older brother who would flop on the couch and give him and Mandy crap.

He was also in need of an assistant and receptionist, and somehow Mandy talked Ian into the job. After two weeks, he understood why the position was open. The appointment book was a mess, their insta needed an upgrade, and the complimentary beverage and snack service reminded Ian of the psych hospital.

And then there was his direct boss, Mickey. Surly and sexy, the man had no filter and no boundaries. Hard working for a man you either wanted to strangle or suck off. It was also harder as his phone blew up each day with the requests, demands, and ramblings of the raven-haired thug.

He had just come back from his run when the phone vibrated.

Pocket Jefe: Hey, is the place you get coffee the place with the coffee I like?☹️

GILF: You drink it black; literally, anywhere I go has the coffee you like.

Pocket Jefe: That’s what I pay you for; how the fuck would I know which shop? I never go to any.

GILF: That’s because your ass was banned from like 9 by the shop because of your donut tantrums.

Pocket Jefe: What, you don’t care about donuts?”

GILF : Well, I am always a fan of a glazed hole.😜

Pocket Jefe:🖕🏻

Back at the shop, Mickey was beet red, grabbed his coffee, and fled to his station.

——————————

Ian was enjoying the quiet of Staples, which he knew would not last. His phone lit up with photo of a sleeve of gears  and lilies, Mickey.

Pocket Jefe:🎤 Whips and chains excite me.

GILF: Are you asking or telling me? 

Pocket Jefe: Keep up the Gallagher. Song. What’s the name of the song with those lyrics?

GILF : Ok, again, I cannot read your mind; I need a little more than your professing love of BDSM for me. Which FYI , I am a fan. You a power bottom by chance? Also, it’s Rhiana, S&M.

Pocket Jefe: Jeez, this assistant of mine makes my dick twitch.

Pocket Jefe: Shit, did I send you a text by accident? FYI, not about you.

GLIF: What text, Mick? 

Pocket Jefe: Don’t worry, your pretty head, sweetheart, just get back here, oh, and bring me a big ass snickers. 🍫

Ian smiled and filed the information he had just given away for a later date.

———————————— 

Ian had just settled after a long day of explaining to Iggy that if he did not write down appointments, Ian could not add them. He had ice cream, jacked off to a certain pair of blue eyes, and was about to watch Drag Race. He had just settled in when his phone almost vibrated off the coffee table.

Pocket Jefe: WTF, Gallagher! You asked Colin about ink?

Pocket Jefe: What you don’t trust me, that stings, man. ☹️

Pocket Jefe: I do much better scar coverage.

Pocket Jefe: not being nosy, but saw those when you changed into a skin-tight tee. This is a semi-professional atmosphere Army, not a rub-in tug.

GILF: I never asked you cause last time I mentioned your work, you were your usually grumpy prick self and threatened to stab me with your Taco Bell spork. You were watching me change; I used to charge guys to see that. So you think of yourself as my pimp? 

Pocket Jefe: Fuck you, is what I think. Enough of this touchy-feely bullshit. Enough chitchat; my appointment is running late. Can you go feed Carl Barks and Noodles for me? Oh, and get me some Pringles, a BBQ, and a pack of smokes. You know the code to my loft.👍

GILF: You know I am off, right?”

Pockey Jefe: You get off when I tell you to get off. You work for me. You are my slave. "C'mon, please.“

GILF: Fucking fine, you need me to peel you a grape too?  🤬

Pocket Jefe: I mean, I wouldn’t say no. Seriously, when you get there, just text me and let me know everything is fine. If you want to stay, we can maybe talk about a coverup piece or something.

GILF: Ohhhh, can we have pizza and a sleepover too?

Pocket Jefe: Your pushing it, keep talking back, and your going from slave to sex slave.

Pocket Jefe: Umm, damn autocorrect, sax slave, not sex 🎷

GILF: Whoring me out to Kenny G? 🥹Bummer.

Pocket Jefe: 🖕🏻

Ian grinned. He was about to get either fired or fucked; he hoped for the latter.

————————

Mickey was just cleaning up his station, and his focus was not on his big fat tip from this work.

Ian Gallagher.

He secretly crushed on the gangly redhead when he would hang with Mandy. He knew about Ian’s history as a medic and the almost-life-ending injury that ended his career. But he saved five that day, who, by accounts, should not have survived the firefight. Deep scars were over that broad chest and hard abs. The story made those scars beautiful. He was always flustered around Gallagher, but he thought he hid it well. 

His phone vibrated, he glanced, his mouth went dry, and the warm tingle went to his crotch. Gallagher sent a photo.

Tight Kings tee, a truly Godzilla-size cock trying to break out of blue boxer briefs. A motherfucking collar. And on a silver platter no less, a small whip, a chain, grapes, and a big ass tube of strawberry lube. 

A text 

GILF: Waiting for you to tell me when I can get off; may I peel you a grape in the meantime, sir? 🫦

Mickey grabbed his keys and jogged out to his car, eager to go blow Ian’s sax. 

[darklydeliciousdesires]

The Dream - Chapter Thirteen.

A huge thank you to all of you offering your engagement. You are appreciated more than you know!

Previous chapters - Prologue  One  Two  Three  Four  Five  Six  Seven  Eight  Nine  Ten  Eleven  Twelve

Tag list - In the comments, please DM to be added/removed (note: those not engaging will be automatically removed from the tag list, FYI)

Words - 3,381

Warnings - 18+ content throughout, minors DNI!

“Hey,” Angel mumbled, roused from his sleep. “Is it time to get up? Feels early, still.”

“Nope,” Jaime confirmed quietly, she and Frankie pulling on their shoes. “We’re heading up to my parent's place for a family day. It’s a three-hour drive, hence why we’re leaving at 6am. Go back to sleep and we’ll see you guys later tonight.” She blew him a kiss, Frankie waving before they left, leaving him to turn over, Keri stirring at his side.  

“Was that them coming in, or leaving? I forgot to mention they’re out all day today,” she spoke, her eyes still closed.  

He turned over, kissing her forehead, smiling when she instantly curled into him, resting her hand against his neck. “Leaving. Let’s go back to sleep, huh?” Wrapping an arm around her, he closed his eyes, feeling good to have her there close to him. He knew she’d noticed, the way he’d closed off a little, his thoughts spilling over and controlling his demeanour, no matter how slight.  

He wasn’t too sure how to articulate it with her either, with it being so soon after them meeting each other for the first time, to speak of the worry he really didn’t need to pay any mind to so early on in what was blossoming between them. For that moment, he chose sleep above anything else. His brain had other ideas, though. As did Keri’s.  

“Where the hell are we?” he asked, approaching her at the side of a river, huge hills bordering it from either side.  

“Galway, Ireland.” She turned to him, reaching for his arms, smoothing her palms over the muscles concealed beneath his dark green flannel shirt. “It’s the place I want to visit most once I’m done at college, and the place that at the very mention of, you closed up on me.”  

She marvelled to herself, at how her nerves and doubts didn’t exist in her dreams, how she could be bold with him without even giving it a second thought. “I think I know why, too, but I risk making myself look like an idiot if I’m wrong.”  

He pulled her into a hug, the impulse not even contemplated, not for a second. “You’re not an idiot. It was my stuff, thinking of shit that don’t even need to come into my head this soon.”

Feeling her heart quicken, she looked up at him. “There’s nothing stopping you coming with me, you know. Those further afield vacations you mentioned? If this thing between us ends up being something, then why not?”  

He began to laugh quietly through his nose, shaking his head. “I feel like an ass, even thinking about all this shit. Damn.”  

“Well,” she began, pulling him down to her level. “You’re not.” She kissed him then, stroking his face with her thumbs. “Now, wake up and kiss me for real.”  

Ten seconds later, and he stirred, Keri moving her head beneath his chin and receiving what she’d requested while sleeping.  

“We’re so dumb.”  

She laughed, stroking his neck. “Yeah, but I guess since we met in our dreams, that’s the place where everything is still easy for us both, isn’t it?”  

He nodded. “Can we go back to just enjoying getting to know one another without stressing about shit that ain’t even come to pass yet?”  

Nuzzling his neck, she wrapped her arms around him, his warmth lovely. “That sounds good.”

“So, we sleeping more, or getting up and doing something?”  

Stretching a little, she sat up, humming, and then lying right back down, Angel laughing. “Not just yet.” Ten seconds passed. “Okay, I have to go pee. After that, though, I’m coming straight back here.” She scooted out from under the covers, heading towards the kitchen, stopping dead when she looked out of the back door. “Flippin’ hell!”  

“What is it?”

“Blizzard!” she called, Angel at her side in seconds.  

“Holy fuck! This wasn’t forecast!”  

“I know! Shit, that’s bad. It usually starts levelling out around now. Damn! I was gonna drive us up to the dinosaur museum as a surprise, too, but that’s just horrific! That’s run and grab more food bad. I’m not eating all of Franke and Jaime’s stuff, just in case it lasts. I’ll get them extra things too. Oh god! I wonder if they’ve even gotten there okay! I mean, it’s only just started here, but that isn’t to say it hasn’t travelled from where they are.”  

One very quick dive into their clothes, and one phone call to the relative visiting couple (who’d arrived safely with mama and papa Brookes) later, and they were walking around the local store across the way from the apartment, luckily without too many other people there stocking up.  

“No! You can’t pay for all of this!” Keri protested at the register, Angel making a tsk noise before reaching right over her head and handing the cashier a handful of bills.

“Y’all don’t tell me what to do. Well, there’s one context where it’d be different.”

She made a puzzled face, his wink instantly bringing heat to her cheeks. “Oh.” Dropping her head as they walked from the store, she winced.

“And that’s enough of that, because I know I don’t have that happening for me anytime soon. You ain’t that kind of girl.”  

She swallowed hard, wishing she could break into the bottle of tequila within one of the bags she carried. “Does it bother you, or do you feel like I’ve led you on, being different in reality to how I’ve behaved with you while asleep?”  

“Nah, but please do one thing for me?” he asked, crossing the street with her. “Next time we’re like that in dreams, be thorough. Please. I’m dying over here.”

And now so was she, too, bursting into a giggle fit all over the groceries she held tightly, one that lasted right until they were back in the apartment.  

“Oh, I love the way she just laughs at my pain,” he commented, glaring playfully at her as he placed the bags on the counter.  

She paused from taking the perishables to the fridge, moving to drape her arms around his neck, leaning to kiss him. “Promise you I’m worth the wait.”  

He growled against her lips, spurring her giggles again. “You damned better be.” They put the groceries away between bouts of becoming wrapped around one another, Keri thanking him for being so generous before heading for a shower, leaving Angel feeling like he needed to go and crotch plant the nearest decently sized pile of snow. He’d never, ever had a girl make him wait for sex before, but he would.  

Just that alone drew him in all the more to her, something a little different to what he was used to, a challenge, a girl who wouldn’t let him between her legs at the very suggestion. Well, not at least while they were awake. It didn’t mean, however, that he couldn’t be playful. Keri neither.  

“Now that ain’t fair, you coming out just in a towel,” he spoke, standing in the kitchen drinking a coffee, shaking his head. “At least gimme a little flash.”  

Her face was aghast. “Mr Reyes! You’re mistaken if you think I’m that kind of girl!” She walked in the direction of the bedroom, grabbing her clothes on the way, knowing he was watching, pulling up the towel and flashing him just a little hint of her butt before kicking the door shut.  

“God damn, that’s a fuckin’ nice ass.” he groaned, placing his coffee down and heading for a shower. A cold one. While he was calming himself down, Keri dressed, making use of the myriad of beauty products her friends always insisted were at her disposal whenever she stayed over, her phone beginning to ring as she was deep cleansing her skin.  

“Morning little,” David chirped brightly. “How’s it all going with your new friend?”  

The emphasis he put on the word friend had her laughing softly. “I don’t think he’s just a friend any longer.”

“Well, if you run out of condoms, I’ll be the cool parent and drop you some more round.”

“David!” she cried, his laugh booming. “There’ll be none of what you’re inferring. I only just met him properly!”

“Good, make him wait a while. Us guys, we don’t mind being driven a little crazy from time to time,” he chuckled, turning up the heater in the garage, where he was doing a little maintenance to both his truck and Meryl’s car. “So, it’s dating now with him, then?”

Rubbing the cleanser into her skin a little more, Keri thought that was a very good question, reaching for the cotton pads and beginning to wipe her face. “We haven’t actually labelled it as such, but I suppose that it is. We’ve just said we’re getting to know one another better. I don’t know how that’ll work long term, being that we live so far apart.”

“Well, kid, just remember you’re what, ten weeks from finishing college now? Not to jump the gun, but you’re free to do whatever and go wherever soon. Who says you can’t decide to be spending a lot of time down in Santo Padre if things work out? You’re a photographer, you don’t need to have roots to once place. You can go where your work takes you.” Putting his phone on speaker, he placed it atop the engine block, taking a spanner to the hose he was attempting to remove. “Greater distances have been overcome where relationships are concerned. Just look at your aunt Bee and uncle Sunni.”

Beatrice, or Bee as she was more commonly known as, was David’s younger sister, who had met her now husband over in India when she had gone out there to work as a doctor in the underprivileged areas surrounding Calcutta. Sunni was a fellow doctor she had met out there and fallen in love with. His parents had originally moved out to Chicago, Sunni a US citizen as he was born there, but had moved back after his training, wanting to give back to the community that his parents had come from and work with those most in need of good medical care.

For the year it had taken Bee to organise herself, her visa and her whole life to move out there and be with him, they had done the long-distance thing, and apart from of course missing each other terribly it had worked out well for them in the end. They had married six years ago, and now had a family of three children.

Thinking of her beloved aunt and uncle, Keri beamed. “You know, as stupid as it sounds, throughout all this I had never considered that, not once!”  

He grinned, finally managing to dislodge the troublesome hose. “Well let's not read too much into it right now, but I’ll just say this. If you two did get together, there's considerably less distance for you to cover to see each other, and less cost. Having said that though, I'll help you out with the air fare to go and see him all the same. I know you have it better than a lot of students because of your job as well as what your dad left for you, and because you still live at home with us. If I can help out in any way to make you happier, though, then I will.”  

Oh, how lucky she was, to have a stepdad so kind. “Has anyone ever told you how wonderful you are?”

“Yeah, she's called Keri Watkins and she usually does so when she's benefiting from the fact that she knows I can never resist putting a smile on her face,” he laughed, making her giggle too. “Anyway, I’m gonna leave you to your weekend. See you when you get home.”

That weekend went by much too quickly for her liking, Monday morning coming around before she knew it, standing at the gate in Angel’s arms at 7:45am, not wanting to let him go.  

“Are you crying?” he asked, Keri burying her face against his chest, hoping he wouldn’t notice. “Aww, baby. Don’t do that! I am coming back, you know.”

“I know,” she croaked, sniffing, drying her eyes on the back of her hand. “I’ll just miss you, is all. I feel like an ass now!”

“You ain’t gonna miss me for long. I shifted some stuff around, so I can come back on Friday. Gotta leave on Sunday morning, though. Got some club stuff to deal with that afternoon, but you’ll have me here for little bit, at least.”

“That soon? You're coming back that soon?” she repeated, making him smile. God, she was adorable. “I’ll have to change my shift at work, so hold on before you book a flight, just so I can make sure I can. I’ll change it to Sunday if possible. We’ll work something out.”  

He leaned down, kissing the tip of her nose. “We will, tiny.” He wrapped her up in a tight hug again, Keri forcing the smile to stick to her face as she kissed him goodbye, wishing him a safe flight and holding him again one more time, Angel having to literally run to get through the gate before it closed. Once he was out of view, she let herself cry, turning and leaving the airport at a quick walk, not brave enough to stand at the window and watch the plane fly him away.

She got out to her car after buying herself a takeout coffee almost the size of her own head, sitting there with the heater blasting as she sipped it, sniffing and drying her tears whilst looking at herself in the rear-view mirror.

“He'll be back on Friday stupid! Stop bawling!” she scolded her reflection, laughing at herself as she dried her eyes properly, glad she hadn't decided to wear makeup as it would have inevitably ended up streaked down her cheeks. She really had no reason to be upset, as he would be back before she knew it, and in the meantime, she had a busy week to keep herself occupied, as did he.  

After he’d arrived home and unpacked, sorting his laundry out, Angel spent a while tidying up his bedroom, noticing a few relics from his last relationship that he’d overlooked, a couple of things left behind by Lucy after their breakup six months before. He sent her a message telling her what he’d found, asking if she was busy since he could swing by her place on his way to the yard.  

‘No, I’m just with the horses! Come by whenever, I’ll be out by the stables.’

Lucy worked from home as a content creator, posting everything about cooking and baking, always doing such with a twist of humour, even working on her first cookbook with a publisher at that moment, too. She might not have been his girlfriend any longer, but Angel was still immensely proud of her.  

Pulling up behind the short row of stables that backed onto her modest home, he dismounted and put his helmet and gloves away, stopping to lift Cece, one of Lucy’s three cats into his arms, the feline purring and drooling as he rubbed her belly. Turning the corner, he saw the pink haired head of his ex pop up over Jeeper’s stable door, Lucy greeting him with a cheery wave.  

“Look, Jeeps! It’s your buddy!” she cooed, the big, Palomino horse whickering softly as Angel approached, reaching to stroke his face and lean to kiss Lucy’s cheek.  

“Is that new?” he asked, poking the side of his neck, watching as she winced before slapping him.  

“Yes!” she cried, a mock growl in her tones. “And it’s still crispy, so leave it!” The sacred heart she’d had tattooed on the side of her neck was very much in the healing stages still. “He’s still a menace, Jeeps.”

The horse snorted, Angel letting go of Cece when she began to wriggle, the cat leaping down to go into the feed room and investigate the mouse situation. “So, how’s things?”

“Tiring,” she confirmed, bringing her grooming kit out of the stable with her and bolting it, nodding in the direction of the house. “I’ve been up since four, making videos and adding more recipes to the shortlist for the book, trying to narrow it down. My editor says no more than twenty.”

His eyebrows rose. “With how many you have in your card index, that ain’t gonna be easy!”

Her nodding was vigorous as they climbed the back porch steps, taking a seat at the small table, Lucy raiding the cooler and pulling out two cans of soda. He’d have killed for a cold beer, but his ex was a staunch teetotal. “And me with my indecisiveness!” She thanked him as he pulled out a bag of stuff from within the rucksack he carried, opening it up and gasping immediately. “Oh my god, you found Boris!”

Boris was a little stuffed toy frog she'd had since she was a child, and had been wondering where he'd got to, just like a couple of other items she found. “Where the heck was this hiding?” she added, pulling out a baby pink lace bra she'd only ever worn once, before Angel had removed it and thrown it across the bedroom, never to be seen again.

“Behind the shelves, of all places. I'm sure I looked there when you first lost it, too,” he replied, opening the can and taking a big gulp.  

Lucy scoffed, shaking her head. “Who lost it Angel? For a moment there it sounded like you said I lost it, when we both know your underwear flinging skills rival the precision of our Olympic shotput team!”

“You did look good in it,” he reasoned, shrugging slightly.

“Yeah, I guessed as much when I saw your jaw drop,” she reminisced, picking a little piece of hay out from under her thumbnail. “So anyway, how was your weekend? Did you get up to much?”

“I went up to Utah for a few days, snowboarding and stuff,” he revealed, fetching his phone out and showing her the picture of him mid-air, looking impressive. Lucy took it from him, beginning to swipe through. “Oh! She’s pretty, who is she?” she asked with curiosity, coming to a picture of Keri and Ash, both posing in a pretend fist fight.

“That’s Keri, we just started dating.” Pulling out his cigarettes, he lit one up, looking back at Lucy. “Sorry, you good with me talking about that?”

She waved her hand, scrunching up her nose. “Of course, I am! Kinda makes something I was gonna ask you moot now, though.” His eyebrow raise made it clear he wished for her to embellish. “So, I’ll be honest. I’m pretty horny, and I thought that maybe you could help me with that? But if you’re seeing someone, then it’s fine.”

Uncomplicated sex on offer. That no one but them would ever know about. It had been more weeks than he even wanted to admit to himself since he’d been with a woman, the whole dream thing with Keri pulling at his focus too much. Angel smiled, delivering his answer.  

“No, thanks, Luce. I, uh, I really like her, and I ain’t screwing that up. You and me, it’s just friends, no benefits. That cool with you?” It hit him then, just how much he really did like Keri, feeling his heart pang a little, remembering her tears at the airport that morning.  

She smiled, sipping her soda. “Looks like imma have to go put my vibrator on charge.”

He snorted laughing, taking a long drag on his cigarette. “You should probably leave it plugged into the mains permanently. It’d be like a scene in a prison movie when they put the electric chair on, you come and all the lights dim.”

“Fuck you!”

He winked, grinning. “You wish.”

She launched Boris at his head in retaliation, Angel catching the frog and hurling it back as they shared laughter. His immediate past with a woman was great, and his future with the current one? He was looking forward to enjoying where it would lead with every hour and every day that passed.

[imperial-topaz2003]

Fenrisprime ranks SWTOR Romances: Expansion Edition

So, I'm still doing a massive overhaul to my legacy which is..slow, fo I figured I'd pick up on ranking this game's romances. First one here, in case you haven't seen it yet. Quick FYI, Major Anri, Arn, or Rass just yet, because they don't seem to have actual romances atm. I wanna give them a little bit more time to flesh out before I do that. I also won't be vanilla romance options who have interactions in the expansions, since everything I said in the first post still applies. However, I will be doing Vanilla companions who are made romanceable in the expansions. Now, let's get into it!

6. Koth Vortena

I bet some of you didn't even know he can be romanced. I'll be honest, I don't hate Koth. Though he comes close, he's not the most obnoxious companion in the game, and I do like the fact that he calls you out on your bullshit if you're too much of a Dark Sided asshole. On the other hand, he doesn't really show any sort of growth. Like, he could've had a really interesting arc about realizing how terrible of a person Valkorion truly is, but nope.

And that's roughly how I feel about his romance. Not terrible, but pretty lackluster. Mainly because BioWare doesn't really have anything to do with him since KOTXX ended. So, he just kinda sits there collecting dust. If he was on the original list, he'd probably tie with Corso.

So, that's probably not a surprise, but the next one might be a bit of a shocker...

5. Arcann

Okay, I like the idea of being able to romance Arcann in theory. An enemies to friends to lovers pairing is honestly something I have a soft spot for when it's done right. Unfortunately, Arcaan has mixed results for me.

First, it comes off way too sudden. It's like it just sidesteps the 'friends' part and heads straight to the romance. And the confession itself...to me, it just reads like a bad fanfiction. Also, Arcann has stabbed the Outlander, put their friends in mortal danger, and blew up so many worlds, I don't think many would be rushing to make him their boyfriend, unless they're very forgiving or straight up masochistic.

TL:DR, the Arcann Romance idea is great on paper, but definitely needed more work done on it.

4. Khem Val

When I first found out Khem was a love interest in Jedi Under Siege, I literally laughed out loud irl. Like, there are moments in this game that made me chuckle, but this actually had me on the floor.

Like, c'mon, the audacity to make Khem a romance is just downright hilarious. I'll admit, it is somewhat heartwarming. I mean, just because he's a big scary monster doesn't mean he doesn't deserve love and affection, but still. This is roughly how I feel about DS Jaesa's romance. Not something I'd do in earnest, but still pretty damn funny.

3. Jaesa Willsaam (Light Side)

Yeah, this one's pretty great. Unlike her DS counterpart, this one actually feels earned. You can't romance her in the base game, and I actually really like that. It helps you two form a really strong bond together, and it all comes to play when she realizes she has feelings for you, which ignites into a full fledged romance, should you go that route. I also LOVE her confession scene. The VA did an amazing job and you can really feel the passion in her voice as she tears up. NGL, this one gets me a bit emotional at times.

2. Lana Beniko

You know her, you love her, it's Lana Beniko. What is there to say? Lana's a loyal and dedicated woman, regardless of whether or not you romance her. She's calm, collected, and willing to work with whoever need be when it comes to getting the job done, but she also isn't a doormat and can be cunning and pragmatic when the time calls for it. She's great! I personally like romancing her as a Jedi or other Republic class. I love seeing two people from opposing sides set aside their difference and eventually develop romantic interest.

Lastly, we have... 1. Theron Shan

Alright, this might be my bias talking, but I absolutely adore Theron Shan.

He's just this very laid back, chill dude oozing with charisma and affection. And personally, I think he fits just about any class when it comes to romance. Granted, that kinda does depend on your personality, I don't think he'd romance anyone's who's too dark or too light, but with enough tweaks, he could theoretically fit just about every class in the game. Don't have much else to say, so I'll leave things about that.

Again, let me know what you guys think. If you disagree, reblog/comment how you would rank them. P.S. I didn't include Nadia, even though you can romance her for the first time as a female consular in the expansions, but that's because my opinions from the original list remain. Tho if you really wanna romance her, the expansion is probably the best time to do it.

[backtothestart02]

Love and Basketball - 1/2 | westallen fanfiction

A/N: Will prob update later today. Enjoy!

...

Synopsis: HS!AU - After an argument with his girlfriend, Iris, Barry is determined to prove he's worthy of her on the court, as well as off.

...

Chapter 1 -

“Put me in the game, Coach.”

Barry sounded irritated, agitated, but the request wasn’t new nor was it welcome, so all the coach did was wave him off.

“Please. My girlfriend is in the stands. She’s never seen me play, and we kinda got in a fight earlier, so-”

“Not my problem, Allen. And fyi-” He glanced at him briefly. “TMI. I don’t need to know about my players’ love lives or lack thereof.” He paused. “Who even is your girlfriend?”

Barry took a breath.

“Iris West.”

Coach gaped.

“Iris West? As in, the captain’s daughter?”

Barry nodded hastily.

“I don’t know how you managed that, and I don’t know if you’ve heard that already, but it’s probably not going to last. Especially if your relationship is based off how well you play on the court. Because newsflash! You’re not very good. No, no, I’d wager you’re the most uncoordinated player I’ve ever had on a team.”

Barry frowned.

“How did I make the team then?”

“Oh. Let’s see…your mother and my wife are besties, and your father is the esteemed baseball coach of many years. Call it peer pressure.”

Barry mulled that over and successfully managed to not be offended, for the time being.

“Please put me in?”

“Allen, we are in the fourth quarter in what amounts to the game before the championship. If we win this, we’re in the big leagues. Right now, the score is neck and neck. We’ll probably win by a single shot, and that shot won’t be coming from you.”

Barry frowned again.

“Why not?”

“Because you can’t make a shot to save your ass.”

“But-”

“Now sit down and cheer for your teammates like the team player I know you are. It’s what you’re best at.”

Disappointed but not seeing a solution in sight, Barry turned away from his coach and headed back for the bench. He looked to the bleachers for a second and caught sight of his girlfriend. She looked worried, which he supposed he should be grateful for, given the huge fight they’d had earlier that day.

He’d gotten jealous over Oliver, the football captain she’d had a major crush on before Barry admitted his feelings for her – and Eddie, the basketball captain, same thing. Iris had a penchant for crushing on the top dog traditionally attractive guys in their class. Which was why he hadn’t thought he had a chance in hell when he finally got up the courage to tell her how he felt and ask her out on a date four months ago.

She had surprised him though by not only saying yes, but by informing him that he’d been her biggest crush of all – him, in all his 5’11 nerdy glory. He wasn’t much to marvel at physically, but apparently she had a fondness for his brown hair and green eyes and freckles that dotted his neck and chess like some sort of pattern. And she’d thought so for years. As far back as 8th grade when he’d really started to tower over her height-wise.

She just hadn’t said anything, because, well, they were best friends, and she didn’t want to ruin that. Him confessing his feelings changed her mind in a heartbeat though, and he forgot all about her other crushes.

That was until Oliver Queen had opted to nominate himself for class president, and Iris had declared she’d vote for him a thousand times over. Barry’s jealousy had boiled over unnecessarily when he’d asked if she’d vote for him, her boyfriend, if he was to run for class president. She’d said she would, but there was hesitancy in her voice. He was sure of it. And he blew up into a basketcase of insecurity and jealousy on the spot.

From the look in her eyes now, he presumed she wanted to reconcile from their fight as badly as he did, but he also wanted to prove himself, that he was just as good as any other guy on the team or any other guy she’d crushed on before him – or perhaps was still harmlessly crushing on.

But he couldn’t do that if Coach wouldn’t even give him a chance.

Then an idea occurred to him, and he spun around, making a beeline for the man in charge.

“Sit down, Allen,” Coach said before he could open his mouth.

He could not be dissuaded.

“Five minutes.”

“No.”

“Five minutes, or…or-”

“Or what? You going to cry to your mommy?” He made a mocking crying gesture with his fist.

“No.”

“That’s what I though-”

“My dad.”

Coach paled.

“You wouldn’t.”

“I wonder what the principal would think after my esteemed coach father tells him that you’re not treating your players equally.”

His jaw dropped.

A whistle was blown, and they both looked on the court.

Teddy Jameson was on the floor, wincing in pain. He was able to get up soon after, but he was limping and clearly unable to play.

“No, Jameson, not you!” Coach cried out, then he scanned the players on the bench looking at him hopefully.

“Put me in,” Barry begged. “You can replace me with someone else in five minutes. Just…five. Please.”

“ARGH.”

Coach dragged his hands down his face, frustrated, but nodded.

“Alright, Allen, you’re in. But five minutes only. Less than that if you screw up.”

“Deal.”

Barry jogged out onto the court and found his spot. The rest of his teammates looked at him and then the coach, mystified, but the whistle was blown again, and the game was in play.

Barry fought for several minutes to catch the gaze of anyone who had the ball, but no one would throw to him. His five minutes was almost up.

Then miraculously, he ended up near the hoop when everyone else was held up by the defense.

“Me! Me! I’m here! Throw me the ball!” he cried.

Not knowing what he was completely incapable of, the crowd started to cheer to throw him the ball until Eddie Thawne had no choice but to toss it to him.

Barry’s height prevented anyone from intercepting it. Once the ball was in his hands, he spun around, glanced into the crowd, found Iris, and mouthed ‘This is for you.’

She looked panicked, but he was convinced this was his moment.

He turned to look at the hoop, lined up the shot as best as he could and threw the ball.

One, two, three seconds passed, all in slow motion.

The ball hit the rim of the basket and bounced right into the hands of a player from the opposite team.

Coach blew his own whistle.

“Allen! Out!”

Deflated, he walked off the court and sat back down. Cisco, his other best friend, sat beside him and squeezed his shoulder.

“Good effort,” he muttered, but the encouragement was lost in the roar of the crowd as Barry was quickly replaced by a slightly better player on the bench.

As far as he was concerned, he’d lost. He’d failed. And Iris was as good as done with him.

He couldn’t even look at her.

His gaze stayed pinned to the floor for the rest of the game when their team one from a single shot – no thanks to him.

He summoned all the strength he could to put on a proud, happy face for Eddie who had shot the winning point and sent them to the championship, where undoubtedly, he would not be playing at all.

That was the way of things though, he thought. For a guy like him, the good things never lasted.

Reluctantly, after the cheering huddle had dispersed, Barry turned to look for Iris in the crowd, dreading the look of pity on her face.

He nearly tripped over his own feet when she appeared suddenly before him on the court and yanked him down for a searing kiss.

[dancingbabya-notes]

Too helpful

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There is supposed to be an explanation (fyi I wrote this sometime in 2018-19) But um welcome to my previous era of writing walls of text ^-^

Gamzee x oc

summery: Zalara was walking to work like normal (does it show that I've never had a 'real job' before?) when she happens on her co worker who is severely injured.

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I was walking down the street, as the chilly September winds blew through my warm long hair. The hairs upon the back of my neck stood on end as a shiver sped down my long sleeve shirt. Distracted by the quick chill I found that I had almost stumbled over a pair of purple conversed feet. Following the feet up I found that they belonged to the lanky clown I was working with. Gamzee Makara.

“Woah, hey there sis,” he grins lazily, the quickest way that I identified the Makara was his wild curls, but I couldn’t dismiss the pain dancing across his features while he held onto his side tightly.

“What are you doing here?” I ask walking a bit closer, splatters of purple blood were visible around him and soaking through what I could only assume as a paper-thin shirt.

“Just chilling, that is until I have to all up and go in for work,” he informs me, and just for a split second as I step closer does a look of panic flash on his painted face.

“I’m headed to work right now actually; do you want to chill in the break room till your shift? It will give me a chance to wrap you up and you always keep a spare set of clothes at work to sit in,” I advocate reaching my dominant arm to his left, which isn’t strewn across his mid-section.

With a raised brow he hesitantly pulls his own lanky form off the frozen ground. “How would you all up and know all of that Zalara?”

“I’m the assistant manager. I need to know this stuff; besides I have some time before my shift. I can clean you up in enough time,” I answer grabbing his hand.

“Thanks sis,” he mumbles, his pride obviously shot since I noticed his wound so early on.

“Well depending on how long you’ve been sitting there, love, I would say that when your shift came around, I would have gotten a call from your roommate about you being in the hospital, not meaning ant insult to injury, but it would have been a lot more serious by the time she realized it,” I inquire muttering quietly by the end.

“Rezi sis isn’t my roommate no more,” he groans from what I can only assume is the strong pain on his left side.

Slowing down I assist him in slinging his left arm across my shoulders, so he is leaning on me as a sort of crutch. Silence envelopes between us, and I continue to lug him to the best of my ability to the deeper part of Beforus Square. Stumbling into the back door proved a task while somehow, we managed to get into the break room without any added injury. Now, sitting Gamzee down was the easy part he welcomed it, but getting him to expose the wound to me was indeed a task.

“Gamzee! Take off the damn shirt before I come back with the medical kit,” I shout glaring at the man before turning like a whip on my heel and walking out swiftly.

Opening the break room door, I slammed it shut as I walk to the closet. Rummaging through the disaster that is the cleaning supplies I finally find the large medical box that we keep. Picking it up I start the short walk back into the break room. Pushing things around in a closet had calmed me down a bit but my blood pusher was not prepared for the sight that I had walked into. Gamzee was lanky but by no means did that make him weak, there was small carvings of the visible definition in his form that was probably a result of chucking supplies in his other job at the post office. I walk closer and push the box onto the table, so I could open it and asses Gamzee’s predicament farther, but the closer I got I realized that there were scars big or small littering his tanned skin, and I chewed mindlessly on my lip clearing my throat to let him know I was back.

“It’s not too bad sis, see?” he gestures to the large gash embedded in his left side.

“To hell it’s not bad! Sit down on the table.” I order crossing my arms with a frown pressed firmly on my lips.

Pulling out a prepared cloth I stared immediately cleaning around his wound, being careful not to poke or probe the wound quite yet. His body went stiff as soon as the peroxide cloth touched his cool skin, and I was surprised by how calm he was during the while cleaning. His rich purple blood was still trickling out but slowly now, and with the wound mostly cleaned I look over the depth and location of the wound taking a large breath of relief that I didn’t know I needed.

“How?” I whisper placing one of a bandages across his stomach reaching around to begin the slow process of wrapping it around his body.

“What sis?” he asks playing dumb, he makes the slightest bit of eye contact with me while I manage to reach around his back to grab the opposing end of the bandage.

“Hold this,” I demand gesturing to the end of the bandage with a roll of my eye as his hand takes over from where my smaller one had been. “You know what I mean don’t joke.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he dismisses the subject without even a second glance in my direction.

“Whatever,” I mumble wrapping the bandage tightly around him and then finally taping it off.

“Thanks, assistant manager sis,” he chuckles as a smile spread on his face like jelly on toast.

“Just be ready to work when your shift comes around. I’ll get your living situation resolved by the end of our shifts,” I explain walking into the woman’s locker room.

I hold his bloodied white shirt in my hand and load it into the washer, changing into my uniform and adding my clothes into the load as well. Purple blood was everywhere, and my stomach turned slightly at the thought of how or when he could have gotten the wound, ideas, and such dancing in the back of my mind before I finally shook them out to walk toward the door again. Letting out a rather large sigh for my small form I walk into the break room to see Gamzee leaning back in the chair with his eyes closed and mouth slightly parted in his uniform clothes. His pants balled on the ground next to the door and his hands folded on his stomach, making a soft smile slip onto my lips before grabbing the article and striding back into the locker room. I send a quick look toward my phone as I quick l open it and send a message to the contact labeled Asst. Manager. When we first started working together, I think it was almost a year ago or more, I had never expected to have such a hard-working person around.

“Zalara it’s almost time for your shift,” our manager Violet calls from the door.

“Just a minute Vi,” I giggle shaking out the clothes quickly.

Before I can load the clothes, I notice jingling noises from his pockets, with a roll of my eyes I empty his pockets into my locker and put them in. After making sure everything is all done, I start the washer and walk out into the hall to start my shift quickly punching in my card officially starting my shift. As soon as I get to the floor, I send a grin to the door.

“Lazlo!” screeches a small voice and I quickly notice the head of black hair.

“James! That’s rude,” scolds the woman holding his hand.

“You must be the new nanny,” I inquire raising a brow at the erotically dressed woman.

“Yup,” A little pop with the p before sending me a narrow-eyed glare. “What’s it to you?”

With a roll of my eyes, I bend down toward the child with a smile. “So, where do you wanna sit today, Captain James?”

“The corner,” he grins with a look in his eye. “I’m meeting a friend today.”

“Oh really? What’s their name so I can send them your way when they get here?” I ask while leading them to the corner booth.

“Dammek, your friend Tavros is bringing them here,” he states with an excited grin on his face.

“Oh, cool. I’ll make sure to say hello when they get here,” I chuckle placing the menus in front of them.

Walking away back to the front of the shop waiting for the next customers, taking quick paces as I wait at least five minutes before making my way back to the table. Cas, Jones, and May are walking around as well, and Cas sends me a frustrated frown as I stop and turn to ask what is wrong. Before I can make it back to the corner booth, I feel a great pressure on my head throwing my body off balance. A deep humming noise fills my ears as I roll my eyes and shoo Cas away. Before I can pull away and face the tall young man, I’m pulled against him as his long arms snake around my waist.

“So Zalara sis, how are you holding up?” Gamzee’s lazy drawl makes me groan.

“Gamzee, could you please remove your head from my head it’s hard to keep my balance and speak to you like this,” I grumble shaking him off a little.

“Nah, you’re warm,” he mutters burying his face into my neck.

“Okay . . .” I mumble turning back to send a ‘get your little scrawny ass up here’ look.

He takes my spot and I grab my tablet and grab Gamzee’s hand walking away from the floor or at least away from the customers. “Gamzee!” I frown facing the tall man.

“What? It’s so boring back here, there’s nothing to do,” he whines making a small smile form on my lips.

“Wanna start your shift? It’ll end earlier,” I explain opening my tablet and typing into the menu of things that connect to the work computer.

“Sure, I don’t mind all up and working right now,” he nods excitedly.

“You’ll be taking my tables today then I guess while Cas and I take turns managing the front.” I explain before taking another glance in his direction.

Both of us walk out to the front and Cas rolls his eyes at me when two people walk in. I immediately recognize the awkward man with a Mohawk fidgeting with the bottom of his shirt, now the little boy standing next to him without even looking up is wearing shades, and not just any kind of shades super dark tinted shades that makes me wonder how in the fuck this kid walks around.

“Hi Tavros, and this must be Dammek,” I smile toward the pair, the young boy looks up at me and I noticed dusted at the bottom of his shades on his cheeks is white freckles.

“Oh, uh hi Zalara. We are supposed to uh be meeting someone who should already be here,” Tavros clarifies sending me a weak smile before I can say anything.

“I know, he made sure to tell me and make sure that you both got the best seat in the café. I’ll lead the way,” I smile grabbing a coloring pad and menu for Tavros.

Both males follow me, and James jumps up running over to the shockingly tall boy and hugging him like his life depended on it. I giggle as a light bronze blush dances on the cheeks of Dammek’s warm face.

“So, have you figured out what you would like to start off with or would you like a little longer?” I ask watching as both boys animatedly speak between one another.

“I’ll have a lemon water, and James said he would have a supreme chocolate. Does that cost a lot?” the nanny asks with an unsure brow raised.

“No, don’t worry. Mr. Strider comes in personally to pay off the tab for James here,” I shake my head crossing my arms.

“Uh, Zalara can I have a small coffee and Dammek said he wants some soda any kind is fine,” Tavros interjects.

“Alright, so a mix mash, supreme chocolate, a lemon water, and a coffee. I’ll be back with your drinks, Gamzee will be serving you for the rest of your stay here so, have a lovely afternoon,” I answer walking away from the table.

A few more customers come in, usually regulars a few new faces and as always James orders more, and more food making me giggle as I assist Gamzee with the food delivery.

“I have a hot pocket cake, some galaxy fries and two bowls of Mish mash potatoes. James what did I say about too much sugar,” I frown holding the tray containing all of those foods that I had named.

“I didn’t do it. Dammek did! He said he has never tried any of the stuff that I have.” James explains in a whine.

“Alright well, here is your food,” I sigh placing the plates on the table for both of the boys.

Gamzee was coming up behind me with more food and I attempted to move out of his way by moving to my left which blocked James’ nanny from seeing behind me.

“Could you move?” she replies before I can do anything.

I cannot deny that watching Gamzee work is fascinating, but this girl was already on my nerves with the way she dressed and how little attention she was giving James to begin with. Gamzee walks up next to me and happily places the plates on the table.

“Thanks for helping me Lil’ mama,” he grins.

I could see the ghost of a claw like scratch raking across his face that was only covered outside of work, I was told by his emergency contact that the makeup he wore was a religious symbol. So, I was quite in shock the first time that he worked with me, and he was completely makeup free, and how dazzling he looked in the uniform. The thing about our uniform is that we needed to look the part, of what? Butlers, but not the whole shebang or like Sebastian in Black butler. Boys donned long black slacks, with a white button up and a red or black vest, also wearing the appropriate shoes, while girls were to wear shorts and stockings of choice with a white button up, and suspenders with the appropriate shoes. Girls usually tied their hair back or used a clip to pull it back. Gamzee was one of the few men with long hair and always had it tied back, so no one argued at all, when he was on the floor women adored him.

“Hello, how many is it?” I greeted the older Nitram male.

“Just me today,” he answers.

“Follow me then,” I send a weak smile in his direction while walking him over to the seating area.

“Thanks doll,” he grins pushing his hair back into place as the bronze streak scatters a bit.

“So, can I get you anything to drink?” I ask holding my little note pad.

“Just some water and possibly your number,” he tries to be suave.

“Hun, that hasn’t worked once any time that you’ve actually come in here. I’ll be back with your water in a moment.” I roll my eyes walking away to the kitchen.

“That bad today huh?” Seth, the main cook, asks looking back at me.

“Rufioh is here. I really am not in the mood for this today. Seth, help me, please?” I whine looking up at the man.

“How about today you have a chocolate supreme with your lunch and you have the special,” he offers platting the food and ruffling my hair.

“Alright sounds nice, I think I’m going to need it,” I smiles weakly before grabbing the water and making my way out of the kitchen.

Placing the cup on the table I send a large smile to the difficult male and hold my tray beginning to walk away.

“Wait, doll. . .” before he can finish Vi comes out and looks at me.

“Hey Zalara, I’m going to take over your tables I got it synced to my tablet so why don’t you take a break,” she smiles patting my back.

“Thanks Vi, I really appreciate it,” I chuckle walking toward the back and when I get into the break room there is a hot plate of (fav food) and a chocolate supreme.

I smile at the gesture Seth always had a way of making me feel better through food. Sitting down to eat I stare at the menacing phone that I barely use, I only knew a few people who had room, but all of them wouldn’t even think about letting Gamzee stay after rumors about his father started circulating between our friends.

“Jupiter wouldn’t mind at all, but I’m not sure how to bring it up to her,” I sigh twirling the device in my hand before attempting to unlock it.

Taking a deep breath and one more sip of the chocolate supreme, I finally seal my fate and listen to the phone ring waiting for my sister to answer.

“Hey, what’s up little sis? You don’t usually call me during work,” she points out making me sit back in my chair.

“I was wondering if you were still willing to have third floor free tenants. A friend of mine got kicked out and was badly injured, and I wanted to know if it’s okay that he stays with us.” I explain quickly almost stumbling over my words.

“How do you know this boy?” she questions.

“I met him through work,” I answer looking toward the door.

“How long have you both been working together?”

“Year and a half,”

 “Are you close to him?”

“Not particularly.”

“What happened to his previous living arrangements?”

“I guess he was kicked out by his roommate. She was blind so I dunno,”

“Oh, he was living with a girl before. What was his relationship with her?”

“As far as I know just friends and roommates.”

“Oh, so you haven’t asked, have you? Little sis, are you playing the innocent card by keeping out of his past relationships?”

“No . . . The questions never exactly came up while I was bandaging his wounds.”

 “Do you like him?”

“What the hell!?”

“What? It’s a serious question.”

“I don’t . . . He’s a cool guy, I mean ugh. Why did you ask that? I dunno I find him cute, and sweet and hard working,” I ramble.

“Oh my god! I was joking at first, but you like him. You really like him, you wanna marry him. You wanna hold him, you wanna kiss him, you wanna love him.” She teases over the phone.

“You are not allowed to watch ‘Miss Congeniality’ anymore,” I frown blushing deep ivy.

“Alright, alright more serious now. Name?”

“Gamzee Makara.”

“Oh, a Makara. You know I went to school with his older brother,”

“You’ve only told me a million times,”

“Age?”

“20 years, sis,”

“Oh, so we like older boys now do we little sis?”

“It’s not like that! Besides it’s only a year difference.”

“Don’t worry the secret is safe with me, not like you can really get in trouble for dating him,”

“Will you shut up? Is it a yes, or no?”

“I have rules, no banging while I am home. Use protection unless you want to make me an aunt then have at it. If y’all breakup I am not cleaning up after you. Only buy food remember no rent please, we get enough of that from the system that mom set up,” Jupiter explains. “If y’all bang at night and I’m not home you stay in his room not yours please. No alcohol, no weed unless medical. There are still three more rooms available so if he has any hot older friends they can stay too, hopefully single too. So yeah, he can stay.”

“Fuck you,” I grumble.

“Hopefully not, I have standards sis, and I’ve already just come to terms that I’m not my type,” she asserts with a chuckle.

“Grrr, there will be no banging on Fuck You Avenue or on Bang Bang Court!” I shout back digging my free hand into my hair.

“Calm your tits sis. It was a joke,” she tries now breaking into a fit of laughter.

“My tits will not calm down they shall be . . . Oh fuck, Gamzee how much of that did you hear?” I mutter looking at the tall sleepy-eyed boy standing in the door frame.

“Uh, not much Lil mama,” he chuckles looking anywhere but me making a deep Ivy paint my cheeks.

“Is that him? I wanna talk to him, put him on the line sis,” Jupiter squeals.

“No, you have had entirely too much sugar and I will not be putting him on the line,” I frown about to hang up.

“Just for a little bit,” she pleads.

“I hate you,” I groan handing my cell phone over to Gamzee.

“Hello,” he questions confused.

Before I can argue against it, he walks into the male locker room preventing me from following, probably a demand of my sister. Waiting a little while he comes back out and hands me my phone not saying a word for a moment while he manages to sit down.

“Lil’ mama, what’s Bang-Bang court?” he asks looking at me.

“I’ll explain when we get to your new place of residence.” I mutter tapping my head against the granite countertop while my face becomes increasingly ivy colored.

“You didn’t all up and have to do that Lil’ mama,” he sighs crossing his arms with a complicated look of frustration and thankfulness on his features.

“I didn’t have to, but I wanted to. Otherwise, it just wouldn’t be right of me to leave you without a place of residence when you are harmed,” I convey while glancing at the time. “Did Rufioh leave?”

“The bro that was giving you a hard time that Vi sis took care of, he left a little while ago,” Gamzee nods starting to eat his food.

I force out the breath that I didn’t know I had been holding and lean back into my chair looking at the boy eating next to me.

“So, we are all up and here until the other assistant manager comes here, right?” he mutters glancing at me.

“Pretty much,” I shrug looking back at him.

“So how long exactly will that be?” he mutters glancing at the door.

“Not long. The girl who takes over after me texted me not too long ago,” I explain glancing at my phone.

He just nods and continues to eat his food; I nod and stand up grabbing my dishes walking out of the break room. Washing my dishes and the rest of the dishes that are there I feel a tap on my shoulder.

“What did I say about doing the dishes?” grumbles a voice of my friend.

“I’m almost done with my shift, besides it’s not like they need me on the floor.” I roll my eyes walking to dry off my hands and give the tall girl a quick hug.

“So, you owe me. What happened to Gamzee?” Kanaya asks looking at me skeptically.

“He was stabbed, luckily it wasn’t too deep. But he was bleeding all over and it was just bad,” I indicate with a frown wringing the towel tight in my hands.

“It’s alright, just take him home and I’ll see you in two days,” she orders holding my face in her hands.

“Thank you, Kanaya. You don’t know how much I really appreciate this.” I mutter walking out of the kitchen.

She just chuckles while I make my way to the break room and back into the locker room pulling on the warm clean clothes. I notice someone else already gave Gamzee his clothes, so I walk into the break room holding all of my things and his while waiting for him to come out.

“Ready to go Zalara sis,” he grins walking up to me while clutching his side a bit.

“Alright, how long do you think you can walk for?” I ask as my eyes travel to his side.

“I can walk as far as you want me to,” he chuckles looking at me.

“We can catch the bus the rest of the way to my house, you know where Nyx grove is right?” I clarify looking at him as we begin to leave the building.

“I think so?” he looks confused.

“Okay so, we are in Beforus square. We ride the 612 till we get to Girst falls then walk from there to Nyx Grove.” I explain as best I can while we walk back into Beforus square main roads.

“Oh, I think I know where you’re talking about now.” He nods still looking completely lost.

“It’s alright Gamzee I’ll drive us to work from now on,” I giggle reaching up and running my hand through his hair a little.

Walking was a completely different experience with Gamzee walking close to me. I didn’t want him walking too far from me in the case that he had not recovered enough to really be walking. Everyone, and I mean everyone, kept a two-meter distance around the both of us like this kid gave them the chills, and it didn’t make any sense to me. When we walk in front of the bus stop sign the bus just pulls up, I smile at the driver putting in money for Gamzee and I, forcing the tall male to sit down first.

“So, Lil mama. What exactly is Nyx Grove?” he asks crossing his arms as best he can, so it doesn’t rest on his side.

“It’s my home, was my Great Grandmother’s land. My grandpa’s brother decided to develop the land and all the money and land went to my grandpa, then my dad and then my big sister. I’ve only ever lived in Nyx Grove,” I shrug looking back at the boy.

“That’s all up and mother fucking cool, so it’s been in your family for a long time,” he chuckles when he notices the vibrating phone in his pocket.

He looks up at me and I just nod slightly as I turn to pay attention to the passing streets, so we get off at the right time.

“Hey. Karbro, would you all up and calm down?” he frowns while I hear the loud voice on the opposing end leak out a bit. “I have a place to stay it’s alright. No reason to get all up and frustrated, I’ll tell you where tomorrow.”

After conversing like this for a few more minutes he stops, and I pull the string to notify the driver of our upcoming stop. Gamzee holds me down tightly as the bus comes to a stop and somehow still almost pulls my whole body off the seat, I frown as we both exit the bus, and we begin the slow walk to my house.

“So, who is Karbro?” I ask confused.

“He’s my moirail. I all up and wrote him down for my emergency contact.” He grins happily.

“Oh, okay. He’s the one who told me about your makeup being religious, if that’s the case Hun then you can keep it on. Everyone knows that it’s a religious reason and will not bother you about it,” I pout looking up at him.

“Nah, it’s all good Lil mama. I don’t wanna all up and be treated any different than anyone else,” he smiles.

I sigh and shake my head while we get close to my house. The pale blue of our house is what reminded me that we still need to change the gog damn color of the windows. Like it’s this nice pale blue and the windows are this tacky green color who thought this would be a good idea, cause it sure wasn’t me. Gamzee looks strained so I let him rest on the porch while I unlock the door. I helped him inside to the house as best I can.

“I’ll take you up the stairs to your room and you can get relaxed there. You need to rest without your shirt on to let the wound breathe a little bit,” I explain as we make our way into the living room where I can already tell he’s been moving far too much.

“Alright Lil mama I don’t mind that,” he chuckles as I notice the obviously pained expression he is trying to hide.

“How about we chill on the couch, we can watch a movie while we wait for my sister to get back, because knowing her she tried to leave us alone for her own entertainment,” I state walking over to the couch and forcing the male to sit.

“Aw but we just all up and walked in, I don’t mind watching anything with a pretty Lil mama like you, but I don’t wanna be a bother to you,” he tries to smile.

“Gamzee. I don’t mean to be forward, but we have known one another for about a year and I will sit on you if you don’t rest for a little bit, am I understood?” I glare my face covered in a blanket of worry.

“Fine, I all up and see your point Lil mama,” he frowns a bit still sitting on the couch.

I nod and quickly put a movie on the TV before walking toward the stairs. “I’ll be right back Gamzee. I’m just gonna change clothes, then I’ll join you in whatever movie you wanna watch.” I clarify as I quickly trot up the stairs.

Peeling off the warm sweater that I wore to work, even if it had been washed once it still smelled faintly of smoke making my skin crawl. Once in my room I pull a tank top over my shoulders and slide the jeans I had been wearing off to wear some soccer shorts instead. Grabbing a spare throw blanket, I make my way down the stairs, seeing that Gamzee had chosen (Scary movie you can’t stand) and that made me more thankful for the blanket. I manage to not glance at the screen while sliding into the seat on Gamzee’s right side hiding my face from the screen slightly.

“You scared of something Lil mama?” he chuckles looking at the screen still.

“I’m not scared, just you know chilling on the couch,” I ramble looking up at him a bit.

“There’s no reason to all up and be scared of this,” he shrugs gesturing to the TV.

I roll my eyes and peek at the screen from around my blanket when I hear a noise somewhere in the house. As soon as a jump scare pops up on the screen my sister just had to walk in the door. A rolling laugh catches my attention making me look at her causing my face to heat up quickly.

“Oh, what did I interrupt? Jegus fuck, what are you watching?” she screeches running to the hall, so she can’t see the screen.

“Gamzee put the movie on,” I shrug glancing at him

“I thought that your sis might all up and like it,” he smirks.

“She’s terrified of that movie in particular,” Jupiter explains.

I shake my head and get up looking at Gamzee. He also stands up and waits for me.

“Where are you going? I said no banging when I’m here,” she asks confused.

“I’m just showing him around sis, I made him rest when we got back from work,” I sigh pushing my hair back.

“Oh, make sure you take him to go get checked out tomorrow,” she suggests walking to the kitchen.

Gamzee sends me a skeptical look as we walk up the stairs to the second level.

“So, there is three floors obviously, since you’re gonna be on the third floor you have roof access. On the second floor is my room and Sis’ room. There’s a bathroom on each level, not much else. Three rooms open on the third floor besides yours, and the computer and closet full of spare things all on second floor.” I explain walking around and down the hall. I pause and point to a (f/c) door. “This door is my room come down if you need anything.”

“I’ll make sure to all up and keep that in mind,” he nods with a slight chuckle.

“Anyway, third floor access is at the end of the second floor,” I explain as we finally happen upon the stairs. “Sis said we have three rooms free, so if you know anyone else in need of a place to crash. She said it was cool.”

Walking up the stairs slowly I make sure that the lights still work as we reach the top and flick the switch. After we both manage our way to the third floor, I lead Gamzee to his new place of residence.

“So, um the only room ready is the one directly above mine and the only perk that provides is the dumbwaiter.” I sigh remembering the state of the other rooms.

“That’s alright with me. Um I can ask Karbro to get me my stuff from Rezi sis’s place tomorrow. Is that all up and cool with you?” he asks.

“Yeah, it’s fine with me, do you need to call him and tell him where you are, or do you want me to leave you to rest?” I mutter staying by the door as he sits on the bed with a groan.

“Would you all up and be alright with looking over my wound?” he requests pulling his shirt off taking slow labored breaths.

“Uh, sure. We can check in with a doctor tomorrow, just to make sure,” I explain walking closer.

“No doctors!” he clarifies.

“What about a call-in physician? I know that my bandaging is alright, but I want a professional’s opinion just to be sure,” I cross my arms.

“Fine, but no doctors,” he huffs.

I nod and start looking over his wound, the bandaged have held up well, but he was still in visible discomfort, and it was making me sad to see him in pain. Making sure that he wasn’t bleeding at all, I gently push him down. Forcing his body into a comfortable resting position, and frown at him.

“Rest, you have my phone number. And frankly I don’t know how much bandages we have,” I frown and climb down and make my way out to my room.

Nothing for the whole walk down to my room, and as soon as I turn on the light and lay in my bed.

The next morning was fine too, I went up to check on him. But as I sat on my bed just after noon, I feel my phone vibrate next to me, my cat Avery starts hissing and clawing at it. I chuckle and grab the device and answer the call while petting my cat slowly to make him calm down.

“Hello?” I sigh.

“Lil’ mama, I just got a message from Karbro and asked if it was alright if you both meet up. He all up and insisted,” Gamzee explains.

“Sure, it’s only like six anyway. Where did he wanna meet?” I sigh while laying back on my bed.

Avery starts walking around circling my body before finally sitting on my stomach and kneading my breast. “At the mall, I guess. He was angry about something.” Gamzee groans.

“Hey, if you aren’t feeling good you need to rest,” I frown.

“No, I’m not all up and in any pain,” he chuckles.

“Avery, get off my chest honestly,” I groan pushing my cat just a bit with a pout.

“Your cat?” he inquires.

“Yeah, well if you’re feeling up to going with me get dressed and be downstairs in about twenty minutes, alright?” I smile sitting up slowly and walking to the closet and grabbing a sweater dress and some leggings.

“Alright,” he chuckles hanging up.

I quickly change into the other clothes and leave my hair as is to save time, slipping my phone into the side pocket of my leggings is the last thing I do before leaving my room. Once downstairs Gamzee is leaning against the railing and taking slow breaths, I walk up to him slowly looking over his lanky stature. When he noticed that I was standing behind him he sent me a weak smile.

“Come on, before we leave you need to take some pain killers, I don’t want you to pass out because you’re trying to sit through the pain for some reason.” I demand leading him to the kitchen.

He follows begrudgingly and takes the medicine that I hand to him. And not even five minutes later we were in my pickup driving to the mall. Gamzee is quiet the whole ride and finally perked up once we reached the mall, and after making sure the car was locked, I was dragged to the mall.

“I know where he would be, I can take you there,” he smiles dragging me behind him.

I stay quiet at his sudden excitement and giggle while trying my best to keep up with his giraffe legs. When he finally came to a stop, he waved enthusiastically to a relatively small male with snow white hair and piercing red eyes surrounded by deep bags. As soon as he noticed us, I was again dragged toward the table this boy was sitting at.

“Hey there, Karbro,” Gamzee smiles.

“Sit down you . . . Just sit down.” The boy mutters with a slight growl his voice was surprisingly high.

As Gamzee and I sat down I waved a bit. “Hello, you must be the ICE contact?”

“ICE?” he gave me a pointed look.

“Yes. Gamzee’s In Case of Emergency contact,” I chuckle pulling my phone out.

“Oh, I remember talking to you now. You’re that Thalos girl that called to make sure you had the right number.” The white-haired boy nods.

“Yeah, it’s kind of my job to check in with all emergency contacts and such. Anyway, I’m Zalara by the way. You should probably know that if your Moirail is going to be housing with my sister and I.” I smile holding out my hand to him.

“Why are you letting him stay with you?” he mutters.

I notice that Gamzee is distracted by his phone, and I heave a sigh before explaining myself. “Alright, so I’m guessing that you’ve known Gamzee for a long time and I’m sure you’re worried about him. I am the Assistant manager at our place of work and on my way to work yesterday evening I saw him bleeding out on the ground in an alley. I wasn’t about to just watch someone I know bleed to death. And from what I’m guessing he doesn’t like hospitals at all, or even the thought of doctors. Now all I had intended to do was give him medical attention to keep him walking for a bit until I could get him to the hospital. Until he told me that Terezi kicked him out, I actually don’t know all the details, but I assume that even if he was still living with her, he would have been long dead before she realized that he was hurt. All I really came here to do was to give you my address so if you needed to find Gamzee you knew where to go instead of looking all over the place.”

“Alright. Well, I can drop off his things from Terezi’s tomorrow afternoon. Thanks, I guess, for doing this,” Kar sighs.

“You know I don’t know your full name. Gamzee wrote Karbro for your emergency contact name,” I clarify writing the address down on a napkin.

“Gamzee, you fucking nooksucker,” Groans the boy. “My name isn’t Karbro, it’s Karkat Vantas.”

“Here you go. Thank you for understanding,” I smile handing him the napkin.

“Isn’t she somethin miraculous?” Gamzee sighs talking to Karkat.

I hear a scoff before I signal Gamzee to follow me out to the truck. We took our time walking back because I could see some form of pain etched deep in Gamzee’s purple eyes. Grabbing his hand, I keep walking to make sure he doesn’t get separated from me and notice his pace getting gradually slower as we walk out of the mall.

“I knew I should have forced you to stay home,” I sigh walking closer and force him to lean on me.

“No, I’m all up and fine Lil mama. No reason to worry,” he chuckles.

“Gamzee, fine if you say so,” I roll my eyes unlocking the truck and helping him inside. “It’s not too late in the day, so I guess I can call my friend to check on you.”

He stays silent as I walk around the truck to climb into the front seat, and I know usually it’s hard for girls that are shorter to drive a truck, but it was how I first learned. I quickly pull from the spot that I had chosen, driving as legally as I could back to my house.

“Lil mama, are you alright?” Gamzee’s low voice asks startling me.

“I’m fine just a little jittery, I get anxious when someone I know is in pain,” I explain quietly.

“You wanna listen to some music to calm you down a bit,” he offers turning on the radio.

I chuckle knowing that if I argue against it, he will do what he wants to anyway, and I continue driving a bit more normal now. Then surprisingly the smooth tones of swing music flood my speakers, I blush deep ivy while pulling to stop at a convenience store. I get out of the car and walk into the store taking a glance back at him before proceeding to buy some quick things. I grab the necessities and some Faygo before paying and making my way back to the car. Climbing back in I giggle seeing Gamzee still calmly listening to the same music. I never expected swing music to be his cup of tea. I put the car in drive and take one more glance at him before driving us the rest of the way home. Once parking in the garage I climb out and watch as the second car following me pulls in.

“Nice to see you, Horrus. You made great time,” I smirk walking to the other side and helping Gamzee out of the car.

“Hello, Makara I presume.” Horrus asks with a smile.

“I’m only being nice since, this Lil mama was nice enough to take such good care of me,” Gamzee snaps with a glare.

I roll my eyes and beckon Horrus into the house while dragging Gamzee with me, Jupiter laughs at a movie playing loudly in the background.

“Hey, sis can you turn it down,” I clamor helping Gamzee into the den.

“So, what happened exactly?” Horrus asks as he begins setting his small bag down.

“Well, I’m not sure what happened before I found him, but Gamzee was on the ground bleeding profusely from a stab wound in his left side,” I explain gesturing for Gamzee to remove his shirt.

“I’m all up and fine Lil mama,” Gamzee protest while lifting his shirt to show the large bandage that I had managed to get on him.

Forcing his shirt up I show the soaked bandage. Maybe laying down and resting should have been the first thing and the only thing he did.

“I need to check that immediately,” he panics.

“Why didn’t you tell me it was bleeding again?” I grumble.

“It didn’t hurt all that much… Sorry Lil mama,” Gamzee looks down.

Horrus was full work mode, maybe thirty minutes and he was finished. Gamzee had stiches holding together the skin and a new cleaner bandage.

“You know how to take care of those, Zalara,” Horrus nods.

I send a nod. “Thank you, make sure you tell me how much that was later.”

“It’s fine.”

“You know I hate when you try to give my sister handouts."

[lotusseedguy]

Twisted wonderland Angst

are you ready to read some angst i made at 2:am bc i was high on caffeine? I HOPESO SO LETS GET INTO IT.

TW- major character death (Yuu dies) heavy angst no comfort, bad grammar, basic angst trigger warnings FYI-Yuu is using he/they pronouns(like mine.), but i'll try to use they more.

this is going to suck but who cares? please do read the TW, I don't wanna trigger anything

A BIT OF INFO-a blot phantom started to attack the school,IDK how but just go with it I guess

3rd person POV-

Fire scorched throughout the collage campus. Bodies were everywhere Yuu stepped, and the cries of the damned echoed through the chaos, like a never-ending melody of pain and suffering. Yuu ran and ran, their breath growing heavier with each passing moment. Blood poured from their wounds, almost like popping open a bottle of blood-red wine. Yuu's feet seemed to have a mind of their own, for they kept running, even though each step felt like walking on broken glass. None of that mattered to Yuu, for all they cared about was finding Grimm.

Yuu finally came across Grimm. But he was in no condition to fight the monster.Grimm's right ear had a piece missing, and lots of gashes and wounds bleeding. "Oh gods, Grimm! "Yuu murmured to the cat, "Let's get you healed. "Grimm's blue eyes peered at the person holding him."Y-Yuu? Are you alri-"Grimm got cut off by yelling. "YUU!GRIMM!"Called Ace. He surprisingly looked unscathed. "Ace," Yuu said," take Grimm the hospital wing. Get him healed as soon as you can.I need to go do something." Handing the cat to the ginger, Yuu took off, leaving Ace to help Grimm.

. . . . . . . Yuu staggered, running as best as he could, as far as possible from that monster. It held a dagger with swords floating around its distasteful head. The beast roared, following. There was nobody to help Ramshackle's Prefect, with nobody but them around. With a sudden movement, a sword came down, piercing into Yuu's back, Knocking them down. Turning their head just in time to watch the beast float away, most likely to find its next Victim, Yuu crawled over to the nearest solid surface, which happened to be an apple tree. Propping themself into a sitting position, Yuu pulled off the locket that they held a picture of the first-year gang in. "heh, I’m gonna miss you guys,huh."They chuckled to nobody. Memorys washed over Yuu, as if he was watching a movie. . . . . . . .". ACE! "Deuce yelled, "WHERE IS MY HISTORY NOTEBOOK! I KNOW YOU HAVE IT" "Uh,Duece,bestie,"Ace started, "I kinda,sorta lost it..." "YOU WHAT-" . . . *BOOM* Epel blinked,"well, that ain't good." Jack groaned"our alchemy assignment just blew up Epel,of course its not good," . . . .. . . ."YUU~YUU~"Ace sang."What Ace?"Yuu asked."well," Ace started *SMACK* The ginger wacked Yuu across the head with a textbook. . . . . . . . Yuu wasn't sure whether to laugh or cry, knowing that they were going to die and will never see their friends or family again. And yet.Yuu was..happy,They smiled faintly before whispering to themself,"I'm going to come back as a ghost and kill those idiots...."A single tear ran down Yuu face as they slowly lost conscious. Listening to the ballad of screams and sheer pain, and panic of the people who were being pulverized by the monster, Yuu had one single thought,'Time eats all in the end..”

With one last deep breath,Yuu's pulse came to a stop.

this was shorter then i planned

[unhealthyfanobsession]

Do you think you’ll continue with the lawyer Nessian fic. It was so amazingly written I’d love to read more! I love all your writing anyways I’ll be happy with anything❤️

Ok not *technically* a Drabble request BUT I’m not ready to commit to a full lawyer AU that happens in order however I did just drum up a part 2 that we’ll say is several years before the previous lawyer AU. Nessian teasing in a bar and Rhys being a dumbass.

FYI the lawyer Drabble I’m talking about can be found HERE.

“I’m in love,” Rhys slurred. Cassian, a decent bit bigger than his brother and two drinks behind him, had a gentle buzz so he could only surmise that his brother was well passed sober.

“Congratulations,” Cassian grinned, clapping his hand on Rhys’ shoulder. “May I lay eyes upon the future Mrs. Dumbass.”

Rhys stared at him flatly. Blew a laugh out of his nose. “She’s not marrying you, brother.”

Cassian snorted, casting his eyes around the elegantly decorated little lounge they’d stepped into for the night. Lounge, not bar. Because they were mature adults now looking to take the edge off after a long day of work, not college students looking to get fucked up.

It was different.

It was different because the cocktails cost $20 and were served in actual stemware instead of red solo cups. They were evolving. Growing. Cassian was a lawyer now and Rhys was supposed to be doing actual work for his dad’s company so… no more dive bars.

Now they frequented little lounges where accountants and lawyers and bankers sat in tailored suits and discussed… adult things.

It was all very civilized.

And yet here was his brother. Every bit the horny college student they were trying not to be. Oh well, old dogs and all that.

“End of the bar.” Rhys jerked his head to the left and Cassian grinned.

“Might be a little old for you, champ.”

Rhys wrinkled his brow and turned to look at the grandmother doing a crossword puzzle on the far left side of the bar. A martini glass in front of her. Good for grandma.

“Other end of the bar!”

Cassian smirked. He didn’t need to turn his head, since he’s noticed her the second she walked in, but he still did. Just so he could look some more.

“Ah, you mean the deliciously dishevelled leggy brunette with her suit jacket on the chair beside her who just ripped the pins out of her hair like they personally offended her and then laid them in a neat little pile beside her Kobo?

“Mmm,” Rhys grinned, “I’d like her to rip those fingers through my hair.”

Cassian rolled his eyes. “Go for it, brother.”

Rhys grinned wider. “I think I will.” He straightened up, ran a hair through his artfully mussed hair, and pulled on the lapels of his Gucci suit jacket until they were even again.

Cassian snickered into his Old Fashioned. Rhys could straighten his jacket all he wanted. He could pretend he wasn’t drunk all he wanted. It wouldn’t matter one bit.

Not with Nesta Archeron.

Nesta Archeron who hated men that stunk of trust funds and privilege more than anything else in this world.

This would be fun to watch.

Watch her try to ignore him at first. Eyes glued to the page of her book, hand reaching up to wave through the air like Rhys was an annoying fly she could swat away.

Rhys, to his credit, was a clever little bastard. He asked the bartender for a refill of her drink and set it down in front of her then sat himself one stool down from her.

He didn’t move her jacket to sit next to her, which would have had her going feral. He just sat there, waiting.

After a few moments Nesta let out an exacerbated sigh that Cassian could hear from across the room. There was his girl.

Well, not his girl. Not even a little bit his girl, but… someday.

Cassian decided that he was going to Marry Nesta Archeron the first time she kicked his ass up and down a negotiation meeting. It was a couple years ago now. He’d been young and new at his firm. She was young and new too, but the words learning curve were not in Nesta’s vocabulary. Everything she did, she did with perfection.

Including getting rid of men she didn’t want hitting on her.

She said something to his brother that made Rhys’ half drunk, cocky, smile fall halfway down his face.

Cassian would’ve given his left eye to know what she said in that moment. She had a knack for jumping at the jugular and Rhys… oh Rhys. So obvious.

After a few moments and the continual fall of Rhys’ face, Cassian decided it was time to intervene. He knocked his drink back and straightened out his own suit jacket. Armani, still overpriced and designer but not so obvious or try hard as Mr. Up On The Trends with his Gucci. Nesta appreciated classics.

Simple. Clean lines, solid colours, classic. Which was why it was so fun just how attracted she was to his half wild self.

Unlike Rhys, Cassian plucked Nesta’s light grey suit jacket up off the stool beside her and reached over her head to hang it on a coat hook at the end of the bar. Settling himself into the chair beside her like it was exactly where he belonged. Which it was.

She turned around with an indignant shriek and a fire-breathing snarl that narrowed into just a hard glare when she realized it was him. Touching.

“This guy giving you trouble, Nes?”

Rhys choked on his whiskey and Cassian fought his hardest to keep a straight face.

“I so don’t need your saviour complex right now, Cassian.” Nesta scoffed.

“No,” Rhys rolled his eyes. “She was doing perfectly well scaring off everyone in a 10 mile radius all on her own.”

Nesta smiled sweetly, “I was just playing your game.”

Rhys sputtered again. Looked up at his brother. “This devil woman that you apparently already know,” he glared, “is all yours. I’m going home.”

“Be sure to drink plenty of water!” Nesta sing songed after him. Rhys flipped them both off on his way out.

“What’d you say to him?”

Nesta smiled. A pretty, feline little thing. “He said he wanted to chat. Suggested 20 question, which is the lamest, oldest, crustiest line in the book. So I went first. Asked just how small his dick was that he felt the need to overcompensate with the swagger and the gratuitous displays of wealth. He thought he was quite clever to use his question to ask if I wanted to check for myself how not small his dick was and then I asked if his daddy never loved him and that’s where all of that machismo masking painfully obvious and deep seeded feelings of inadequacy and insecurity came from. I was going to offer him my friend’s number before you showed up. She’s an excellent therapist.”

Cassian laughed. Hard. For a very long time. He loved Rhys, but sometimes the kid could use a nice set down. It was always sweeter when delivered by a beautiful woman. Not to mention, Cassian himself had gotten the same ice cold rejection the first time he met Nesta. When he asked if she wanted to get a coffee and she looked at him like something she’d scraped off the bottom of her shoe. That Rhys was chased off so easily just proved he couldn’t take the heat.

“You know the walking trust fund, I presume?” Nesta boredly sipped the drink Rhys had bought her. And even that was somehow amusing.

“Only for the last couple decades or so,” Cassian grinned. “He’s like a brother to me.”

“Explains a lot.”

“Your insults are more impactful when you clarify which person is being insulted.”

“I was going for the two birds one stone method.”

“In that case, consider me wounded, sweetheart.”

Nesta scoffed, “Unfortunately not mortally.”

“Oh Nesta, if I weren’t here you’d die of boredom and you know it. No one else can run you up and down the courtroom like I can.” Now. Cassian grinned as he watched the word flash across her eyes. He’d never live that first blunder down.

Nesta rose an eyebrow. “Bold of you to assume you present any challenge whatsoever.”

Cassian signalled for another drink and leaned forward. “Alright, I’ll bite. Who in this entire city can give you more of a run for your money?”

“Vanserra.” Nesta looked him dead in the eye. And managed to keep a straight face. As if that wasn’t the funniest fucking thing he’d heard all day.

“Oh yes, Nepotism and Nepotism LLP certainly has us all shaking in our boots,” Cassian blew out a breath. “What are you working on now?”

“I’m working on upholding attorney-client privilege.”

“So, the Suncurser merger.”

Nesta looked up. “How did you-”

“Helion and I are old friends. I checked the zoning on the lots he was buying before the merger went ahead to make sure the expansion was even feasible. But, as you know, M&A isn’t my thing. So I may have… given him a referral.”

“Are there any rich playboys in this city that you aren’t friends with?” Nesta finished off her drink and pointedly didn’t signal for another. “And if you think I’m going to be grateful to you for sending this my way you’ve got another thing-“

“Helion is my friend.” Cassian repeated, cutting her off. “He believes in this merger and he wants it done right. You’re the best, Nesta. Why wouldn’t I send him to you?”

“It’s not just to get in my pants?” She narrowed her eyes.

Cassian laughed again. “Oh no, sweetheart. When you invite me into your bed it will have nothing to do with work. It’ll be because you’re tired of denying how much you want me.” Cassian leaned in closer, one hand resting on the back of her chair. “Tired of denying the thrill that shoots through your whole body when we lay into each other. In the court room or out.” His nose brushed against hers, just a little, and Cassian felt Nesta tense up. He smirked, mouth just inches away from hers. “Tired of denying how right this is.”

Nesta’s voice was rough, husky. “So your plan is to wear me down?”

Cassian smirked. “My plan,” his hand came up to stroke the silk covered expanse of her upper arm, “is to marry you, Nesta Archeron. But sure, we can start with wearing you down.”

***Feyre and Nesta look physically similar so you can’t tell me drunk Rhys wouldn’t hit on Nesta in a bar before realizing he’d made a terrible mistake and running away thank you***

Also tags yourself, I’m the grandma doing the crossword puzzle with a martini. She’s an icon and she is the moment.

[cacoetheswriting]

library hours

Pairing: Spencer Reid x gn!Reader Warnings: maybe a swear word or two, really just FLUFF ft. baby spence Word Count: 1.3k Summary: A late night at a university library leads to reader meeting a tall brunette genius. [fyi i wrote a reimagined version with professor reid x reader. you can read it here]

A/N: dedicated to the amazing @ellesgreenaway​ for inspiring this little fic & giving it a title!!  ❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️

-

There was something you always enjoyed about the going to the library.

Perhaps it was the way every single person that walked through the threshold had a purpose. A mission to complete. Perhaps it was the quiet. The solace you felt sitting alone in a corner researching various topics, for class and for recreational purposes.

The university library had quickly become your second home. A location you frequented more than your own dorm room. It wasn’t always to study, no. You people watched. Doodled. Even napped there from time to time. The place brought you peace, and by the time you senior year rolled around, you saw the librarians more than your college friends.

The university library was also the place where you first met a certain young brunette genius - which in time became the main reason why you liked it so much.

Lights were slowly being turned off section by section. A vacuum came to life in one of the aisles. People started to scramble from their seats - shoving their things into their backpacks, throwing out empty coffee cups into the overflowing bins, checking out books they might still use that evening.

All signs indicating it was time to go.

Dolly, one of the librarians, ushered towards you. Her jacket draped over her shoulders, her bag in hand. She gave you the usual spiel of how you can stay until the janitor is finished cleaning, to which you politely nodded along. She wished you a pleasant night, and with a “see you tomorrow” she hurried out the door.

Once she was out of sight, you groaned under your breath and ran your fingers through your hair. You had an assignment due tomorrow, one you started hours ago and only managed to formulate three total sentences. Your gut was telling you there was no way you were going to finish now, especially since you had about thirty minutes until you would have to leave.

Leaning back in your chair, you fluttered your eyes closed in an attempt to collect your thoughts. The tranquil feeling didn't last long as you were abruptly brought back to reality by a loud bang. You quickly sat back up and scanned the space for the source of the noise.

A tall brunette man, not much older than you, stood a few tables away, a heavy looking book at his feet and a shameful look spread across his features.

“The library is closed for the night.” You stated. The brunette scrunched his nose briefly. “B-but you’re here.” He remarked before leaning down to pick up the book he dropped.

“I have permission to be here.”

“What if I do too?” He challenged, taking a step towards you although still keeping a safe distance.

You folded your arms across your chest and arched a brow. “Well, do you?”

The brunette didn't respond. Instead, you noticed how his cheeks flushed a shade of red, how he clutched the book to his chest, and how his fingers tightened around the strap of his bag.

You couldn't help but smirk as you let your arms fall back down to your side.

“I’m just kidding. Come on, join me.” You said, pointing to to the chair across the table from you. “We have about twenty-five minutes before we get kicked out, might as well make the most of it.”

He hesitated for a split second, hovering in his spot. It wasn't until you turned your attention completely away from him, and back to the book in front of you, that he made his move.

“You’re not some sort of killer, are you? You’re not here to murder me?” You asked, looking up as he sat down. His eyes widened and he quickly shook his head in response. “Ehm... N-no.”

“That wasn't a very reassuring no, but I guess I’ll take it.” You nudged in response, and proceeded to work away on your assignment. As you worked, you could feel his eyes burning into you.

In any other situation, with any other stranger, the feeling would have made you uncomfortable. But there was something about the timid stranger that was quite welcoming.

“I-I actually, uhm, I profile serial killers. I help catch them.” He said after a moment of silence. Once again, you glanced up from your notes to look at him. Intrigue greeting your facial features. “I just started with the FBI.” He stated.

It wasn't a brag. No. It was a statement to make you feel more safe, and you couldn't help but smile at him. “So, mister FBI, what are you doing in a university library on a Thursday night?”

“Doctor.” He corrected.

“What?”

“Doctor FBI.” He said, corners of his lips twitching upwards. “I have PhDs in Mathematics, Chemistry, and Engineering.” Now, that was a brag.

You chuckled softly. “You don't happen to have a PhD in History under your belt, do you? Because that would be very helpful right about now.”

“No, but I do have an eidetic memory and can read twenty-thousand words per minute.” He declared. You stared at him in disbelief, your mouth parting ever so slightly in shock.

“Did they make you in a lab or something?” You teased, although you could tell he didn't find it amusing. He furrowed his brows, lips pursed into thin line. You chewed down on your bottom lip, feeling slightly ashamed for poking fun at the guy who was nothing but be nice to you. “I’m sorry.” You mumbled faintly. “That was rude.”

“It’s okay.” He quickly reassured, and shot you a timid smile. The two of you stared silently at one another. There was something amicable about the seconds that passed as you looked into his hazel eyes. Something harmonious. Friendly. Strong.

You cleared your throat. “There uhm, there’s this dinner not far from here. It’s twenty-four hours so they won't kick us out. Would you like to come with me? We can share a pie. I mean, if you’re into that. Or, or we can just have coffee-”

“Y-yes, I would love to.” The young doctor answered all too quickly causing you to grin at him.

Soon enough you were both packed up and up on your feet, heading towards the library exit.

There wasn’t a cloud in the sky making the million stars shine all that brighter. They looked like perfect sugar granules spilled on a dark surface, accompanied by the glowing moonlight. Breathtaking.

Street lamps glittered ahead, illuminating the streets. The two of you walked side by side, almost in sync.

“Does that big brain of yours possess information on Roman gods?” You asked while nonchalantly hopping up on the curb. You spread out your arms like a tightrope walker, and with one foot carefully placed in front of the other you continued your journey.

The wind blew lightly through your hair, your brunette companion observing quietly. A smile creeping up on his lips. “Because if you do, I might ask for your help with an assignment.” You glanced at him briefly.

“I-I do actually, ehm. The... The Ancient Romans were extremely religious, and believed their success was due to their strong beliefs. They believed that if you maintained a good relationship with the gods, they would be kind to you.” He briskly cleared his throat. “There were twelve Olympian Gods in total. Jupiter, Juno, Mars, Mercury, Neptune, Venus, Apollo, Diana, Minerva, Ceres, Vulcan, and Vesta...”

You let out a soft kindhearted laugh. “Okay doctor FBI, slow down. Wait until we get to the diner so I can really appreciate your genius.”

He blushed, feeling thankful that the darkness around prevented you from seeing. “It’s Spencer. My name, uhm, my name is Spencer.”

You stopped in your tracks and elegantly hopped off the curb. Spencer turned in his spot so that he was now facing you completely, only an arms reach away.

“Spencer...” You tested the name on your tongue, a smile embellishing your features. “It suits you.” You retorted before proceeding to introduce yourself, “I’m Y/N. It’s nice to meet you, Spencer.”

-

masterlist

spencer reid taglist: @no-honey-no​, @calm-and-doctor​, @idroppedmygourd​​, @averyhotchner, @wowitsel, @elldell1204, @hey-there-angels, @reidabookforonce, @ellesgreenaway

[shirophantomvox]

Leorio, Hisoka, Illumi, and Chrollo Head Canons #2

What’s up y’all! Thank you so much to the people who have given me feedback about what posts you all would like to see! This post will be about the “Adult Trio” and Leorio about how they would help their significant other with a subject in college. This one is a good suggestion! I’m going to incorporate fluff in this, as I am a sucker for fluff. I hope you all enjoy this! I most certainly do. This post is about 2687 words but don't worry, it's worth the read! These head canons came from my mind its a coincidence that some of these pictures match the thoughts. Portentous (old English) means wonderful or marvelous (in modern English) FYI: I am thinking about creating a discord server for both Voltron and Hunter x Hunter fans. I don’t know how to use the fancy perks of discord yet, so if you know how to and can help me out, send me a message! Alright, let’s get to it! Obviously these images are from Pinterest.

Discord Server for Voltron and HxH fans!

Leorio

“Mr. Leorio”, as we all know, is a sharp guy. He dresses in a suit, carries a suitcase, and wants to be a doctor. This man knows everything about academics, especially math and science. He will need to know these subjects to be a successful medical doctor.

Leorio received an A- in Calculus II and a B+ in Organic Chemistry. He was the only one that passed with flying colors while everyone else barely made it. He didn’t gloat in their faces but as soon as he got into the hallway he jumped for joy.

He was extremely happy about his progress and counted the days until graduation even though that was in 5 years. Wow! Don’t we love graduate school?!

He deserved the high grades because he spent countless nights studying missing parties, football games, and being with you just to make sure he was on the right track to graduating on time.

As we all know, Leorio wanted to pursue this career because he witnessed his best friend dying in front of him powerless to save him. The care for his friend would have been too expensive. Obtaining his degree was in honor of his friend; he’d save countless children, women, and men who’d all thank him for his hard work.

Leorio didn’t socialize much, but he did find himself hanging around a group of classmates that were a part of a co-ed fraternity that provided information on scholarship money for graduate school and job opportunities. This is where he met you. You didn’t want to be a doctor but instead wanted to be a computer scientist and decided to volunteer for this fraternity job fair.

As he rejoiced, his smile faded when he saw you walking down the hallway; tears falling from your face not caring who stared at you. He quickly walked up to you, put his arm around your back, and gave you a soft hug.

“What’s the matter,” he asks.

You were failing Calculus, a class you’ve been taking since the 12th grade but for some reason, you couldn’t pass it. Everyone else had A’s and B’s, while you had a D. D’s aren't accaetable in college; most make you retake the class.

“Don’t worry. I’ve just passed my midterm. I can help you study. You’ll pass; trust me.”

Later on that evening, he kept his promise but gave it a unique twist. He kept the lights off and lit 4 Yankee-sized candles in the room that smelled like Lavender. In the background, he had piano jazz playing on his speaker. You felt confused for a moment. You and Leorio weren’t necessarily dating but you both flirted with each other here and there. He wasn’t a social butterfly, but he felt comfortable talking to you.

“Um...what’s the music for?”

“It helps me concentrate. Believe it or not, it helps my brain flow. You like it don’t you?”

“No, actually I don’t.” Truth be told you loved it but you wanted to pull his strings a little. He looked up with a confused look.

“Ok. I’ll turn it off.”

“I'm kidding! It’s great!”

Whenever he cannot solve a Calculus question, he reviews similar problems from Algebra II. He applies this knowledge to your problem.

“Perform the indicated function evaluations for f(x)=3−5x−2x^2 . I’ll solve the first part for an example: f(6+t) simply means you will exchange “x” for 6+t. It will look like f(6+t)=3-5(6+t)-2(6+t)^2=-49 . You’d distribute -5 and -2 to the numbers inside of the brackets in which they are next to.”

Wow, that was easy! Wait, not he must think you’re stupid.

“You must think I’m stupid, don’t you?”

“Of course not! It took me a while to understand it too. You’ll apply the same knowledge for the rest.”

After what seemed like 4 hours (which was 2), you finally finished your homework! It was probably wrong but at least you made it past the 1st question! As you blew out the candles and turned on your LED lights instead, you see Leorio sleeping on your couch. Something about his soft face made you smile and place your hand over your heart.

“My little doctor,” you whispered to yourself.

“Well, come give this doctor some company then. I’m freezing over here!”

The throw blanket was large enough for you both. Snuggling on the couch was a great end to a stressful day.

Chrollo

To everyone else Chrollo was “Boss” or “Boss Man” but to you, he was Chrollo. Big C was known for his love for poetry and language.

He read poetry any chance he had at lunch and even dinner. It had gotten so bad that you had to tell him for the millionth time “No books at the table!”

Given his past, he always read at least 2 hours a day or one book a week. Reading is what got him through the day.

He was staying in your dorm for the day to relax because he had taken and passed his midterms to. The young thief thought about hiding in the closet but he didn’t because he sensed that you’d be tense because of midterms.

As you walked through the door, you looked angry, so angry that you could punch a wall. He immediately rose to his feet, threw his arms straight out in front of him, and motioned for you to stop. You just stared at him blankly.

“Come here,” he said like you, on cue, melted in his arms. He was warm and the deepness of his cooing voice vibrated against your neck. “What’s the problem?”

“I’m failing this stupid Shakespeare class!”

“Really?”

“Yes and if I don’t pass this midterm I’m going to fail the class for the 3rd time. I want to drop out! Who needs this scam anyway?!”

Chrollo held you a bit longer until you were ready to sit down and get to business. You pulled out your college’s book about Shakespeare plays and how he used Old English. Chrollo was the perfect man for the job! He’s read Macbeth and Romeo and Juliet several times!

Chrollo read a few stanzas and explained them. He then had you read some on your own and explain them...still you can’t.

He notices the problem immediately. He catches you snuggling comfortably against his toned arm, nearly falling asleep.

Chrollo laid at the very corner of the couch as you lay horizontally placing your head against his chest. You were comfortable but you weren’t able to focus. He notices this and slightly demands that you go sit at the table. When it came to academics, he was serious.

For as long as he had been reading, he has an arsenal of vocabulary words ready to be of use. He created flashcards for you and had you flip them over for nearly an hour. You start to memorize the words!

But you’re not done yet.

“Say the word ‘portentous’.”

“Por-ten-trious…?”

“No. Por-ten-tas.”

“Tias…?”

He moved his chair next to you, just an inch away from your face. He cups your mouth and moves it as he speaks again. This wasn’t a hard clutch, it was soft and he wasn’t irritated but he could sense that you were becoming irritated.

“Por-ten-tas,” he said again.

Instead of letting your cheeks go, his eyes diverted to your lips. They were moist and plump, ready to be met by his.

“Your lips are gorgeous. Kisseth me quite quaint.”

Oh no. Look at the monster you’ve created.

Chrollo created a reward system. Whenever he did things right as a child, he was rewarded with money and jewels. For every word you pronounced and defined correctly, he kissed you once. For each word you got correct in a row, he’d kiss you twice.

Soon enough he had kissed you so much that you couldn’t see straight!

The kisses worked because you passed your midterm! Each kiss placed a stain in your brain that made you remember the definition and how to pronounce it.

You and Chrollo celebrated by drinking champagne and listened to him read Sonnet 23 and 57.

Hisoka

As unusual as it seems, Hisoka is gifted when it comes to Chemistry specifically. That is why you two work well together...there is some chemistry going on between you two.

His hair down and his glasses were his alter ego, it was something that made him act completely different than what you were used to.

When you all were freshmen, he would skip class, attend parties, and would be hungover almost every week but once he was called into the Dean’s office, he changed.

You slightly missed that edgy side of him, but you enjoyed having a serious beau.

Hisoka is a social butterfly and is the life of the conversation and you loved him for it but sometimes it was awkward.

While he was chatting away about Calcium (Ca) and Iron (Fe), you stood there nodding like an idiot. You had NO IDEA about what he was talking about and that is why you were going to drop your chemistry class.

“I saw an imbecile put aluminum foil in the microwave and it burst into flames. How did they not know that Microwaves are the radio waves falling under frequency around 2500 megahertz? Any metallic object detected by radio waves inside the microwave acts as a reflector of radio waves.”

You shove his arm hard. He was acting arrogant in front of his friends. You were used to this but it got on your nerves. You made mistakes, everyone does!...even those that almost burn down the entire dorm room.

You two leave the party and head to his dorm room. Once you were settled, you released a can of anger and threw it all over your boyfriend.

“Hisoka? You just humiliated me.”

“Oh? No one knows that I was talking about you, my dear.”

“Don’t ‘my dear’ me! I asked for your help and you’re ignoring me. I don’t appreciate that. I didn’t ignore you when you sprained your ankle, did I?”

“No, you didn’t, dear. I supposed I have a few hours to kill. What do you need help with?”

Hisoka’s way of studying was much different from other students. He exercises like crazy before he opens his textbook.

He listens to EDM instrumentals while on the treadmill and when he lifts weights. You weren’t standing there like a trophy, he made you lift too.

“Being healthy will help your brain flow more easily. Lift this dumbbell as heavy as you can.”

He ran a mile on the track upstairs. Sweat dripped from his face like he had been standing outside in the rain.

By the time you returned to his dorm, you were beyond tired. You laid your head on his pillow but just as you closed your eyes, he pulled you up on your feet.”

“Not on my watch,” he tutted. “It’s chemistry time.”

You were having trouble memorizing Chemical Formulas and this by far was the most difficult concept you had come across.

To make you stay awake, he turned on a bright LED light and faced it towards the table. The bright light nearly made your head fall off from the pain it reflected in your eyes.

Hisoka grabbed his book and began to write down the major chemicals on the periodic table and their charges.

“Pay attention to the following abbreviations and charges: Calcium is Ca, Chloride is Cl+2, Carbide is C+2, and Carbon Dioxide is CO+2. Read these over and I’ll test you again.”

He did just that but you still weren’t understanding. You were ready to give up.

Stupid scam. Why do I need a piece of paper to determine what I can do? You thought to yourself. Well, it’s obvious. If you can’t do the work now, what makes you think you can do it at a job? Harsh, I know.

“Let me try this,” He said. He carried you to his bedroom and gently placed you on it. He took off his shirt and removed his glasses. “Aluminum has a charge of +3 and Oxygen has -2. If there were three of me and two of my clones disappeared, how many of me are left?”

“Just you, right? One”

“Correct! Excellent.”

Wow, everything started making sense once he took his shirt off.

From then, he just inserted himself into the equation and then it started to make sense! He apologized for running his mouth earlier and promised to keep any more secrets between you two. The night ended with you sleeping in his bed wrapped in a cotton blanket just cuddling and that was it. And bam! You slept as sound.

Illumi

Dating the “hot” quiet history buff was a flex of its own. Sure Illumi didn’t talk to anyone besides you, but it didn’t matter. People swooned if he looked in their direction.

History was a popular major during your era. People were not like their grandparents; they wanted to learn about other cultures besides their own. Illumi’s specialty was in world history and civilizations. The class was very interesting to you but there was so much information, you could barely process it.

Illumi often wrote his essays in one day proofread and all! He often charged people to look their essays over.

One time he made $500 in one year!

Glancing at your transcripts, he notices that you have a C- and offers to help.

“Why are you looking through my stuff?”

Hey, he’s your boyfriend! But still, he should ask.

“Sorry. It was up on the screen,” he said, throwing his hands in the air.

You began to blush in embarrassment. The hottest smartest man in the building now knew that you were failing one of the easiest classes on campus.

Placing his thumb under your chin, he lifted your head to meet his gaze. “There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I can help you.”

“How? I am so behind! I zoned out after chapter 2!”

“We’ll watch a movie.”

“Oh, God! Not one from PBS is it?!”

“Yes. How else are you supposed to learn?”

He turns on the movie and allows you to lay your head on his shoulder but not too much. He is aware of your tricks and he wants you to pay attention.

Every 15 minutes, he pauses the movie and asks you checkpoint questions. If you got them wrong, you had to stand up with your underclothes on (t-shirt and shorts) in the cool room for 10 minutes. If you got the questions right, he allows you to lay more comfortably. You were already in your underclothes but you were under the blanket.

He made you write down key definitions and the embarrassment of each section.

After the movie, he blindfolds you and reads out a term. Surprisingly, you got them all correct!

As a reward for your past midterm, he takes you to dinner at a restaurant where he slips a promise ring on your finger containing your birthstone.

[heyyyharry]

Deep End - Chapter 2: Birthday Boy

…in which Harry gets the birthday surprise he didn’t ask for.

Word count: 4.7k

AU: famous!harry, siren!mc, adult modern retelling of the little mermaid? lol, fake dating, enemies to lovers.

WARNING: MATURE THEMES

All chapters / Synopsis / Moodboard / Playlist

Wattpad link

A/N: Thank you for all the love for Harry and Ezi after chapter 1. Please let me know what you think about each chapter so I can be motivated to write faster 😆

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“Humans are so funny. You make up false stories about us and refuse to believe anything that isn’t the same as your imagination,” the siren said.

Harry tossed his head back and laughed. He held out a finger at her. “No, mermaids aren’t supposed to exist. You’re not supposed to exist.”

The siren narrowed her sharp gaze, and Harry quickly moved back a bit in fear of her grabbing his leg and pulling him into the water. To his surprise, she said, “And who are you to decide that? A useless human with a useless tail–”

“Okay, enough with the tail joke.”

“–can’t even survive the drowning deep. You don’t want to believe we exist, so you won’t have to carry the guilt of trashing our homes and murdering our kind.”

Baffled, Harry worked his jaw while silently cursing himself for never taking part in those debate classes back in school. Well, to be fair, he couldn’t have known that one day he would have to debate with a deadly siren in a cave on his goddamn birthday!

He shut his eyes and sucked in a breath. “Look, lady. I’m only one small human, with a bigger than average human tail, FYI.” The siren eyed at his crotch in disbelief, so he quickly crossed his legs. “But that’s beside the point! What I was trying to say was that, if you’re seeking revenge, I can’t satisfy you because I’m not responsible for trashing the ocean or shit like that. I’m a singer, alright? And I don’t even live here. I’m from London. A land far away. If you wanna murder a human, I suggest looking for Elon Musk.”

The siren stared at him like he was the mythical creature. “I’m not familiar with all the names you mentioned,” she said, folding her arms across her chest, which had been a big distraction for him. Good to know that he could still get horny while facing death.

“Don’t you guys have fish Wikipedia?” he asked, and she tilted her head, looking rather confused. Harry pinched the bridge of his nose. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have assumed that you should know all the facts about humans. That sounded like discrimination against sirens.”

For the first time since Harry met this siren, she actually smiled at him. “You have a lot of funny words, you strange creature,” she said, her eyebrows knitted in fascination.

“You know what?” Harry exhaled sharply. “Since you’re my kidnapper, I’m gonna stop arguing with you in case you still wanna kill me. But today is my birthday, so I can’t be kidnapped. I haven’t posted a thank you message on Twitter yet, and I might get cancelled for that. Celebrities get cancelled for literally anything nowadays. It’s annoying.” The siren blinked at him, her pink lips slightly parted. “Right,” he breathed. “You don’t have a Twitter account.”

“You said you were a singer.”

“That’s all you got from my long speech?”

“What is it? Singer.”

Harry bit his dry lip and frustratedly combed his fingers through his damp hair. “I sing. Use my voice to entertain other people.”

“Oh, like sirens.”

“I guess.”

“Except that we use our voice to kill people.”

“What?”

“Sing for me,” said the siren despite Harry’s horrified look. She seemed excited as she rested her folded arms on a boulder and gazed up at him with a twinkle in her crystal clear blue eyes. “Let’s hear it. I didn’t know humans could sing. Let’s see if it’s good.”

“Fine.” Harry blew out his cheeks and cleared his throat.

He began to sing.

“Walk in your rainbow paradise–”

“What’s a rainbow paradise?” the siren asked, but he didn’t stop singing to answer her.

“–brown skin and lemon over ice.”

“Why are you singing nonsense words?”

Once again, he ignored her, this time, closing his eyes. “I get so lost inside your eyes. Don’t you believe it? You don’t have to say you love me.”

“Love,” the siren repeated the word as if she had never heard of it in her whole life.

Harry opened his eyes and found that she was looking at him as if she could see right through him. He went on, “You don’t have to say you’re mine. Oh honey, I-i-i-i walk through fire for you. Just let me adore you.”

“Why would you walk through fire for someone?” the siren wondered out loud as she stared off into the distance, her strong brows knitted. “That's stupid. Fire is hot. I saw the humans on the boats use it one night. I almost burned my fingers trying to touch it.”

“Yeah, don’t play with fire.”

“Then why would you walk through it?”

The siren pouted, and Harry caught himself smiling at her naivety. “It’s supposed to mean that you’d do anything for the person you love. Even risking your life.”

“That’s stupid,” the siren repeated her earlier remark. For a second, Harry saw a curious little girl and not a dangerous sea creature from earlier.

“Well, it’s just a song,” Harry told her. “I personally wouldn’t do that for anyone, either, but some people do love with all they have, and would sacrifice everything for the one they love.”

An angry frown had replaced the siren’s previous perplexed expression. “Some humans murder the ones they claim to love,” she said in a cold voice. Harry felt a chill running down his spine, but then the siren went on with a softened expression. “Sirens are not supposed to love. Love is a weakness for my kind.”

Harry nodded. “Bet you don’t even have a heart.”

The siren cocked her head; a corner of her mouth raised subtly. “Every living and breathing thing has a heart. Sometimes it’s valuable. Sometimes it's not.”

“Only valuable if it’s the heart that you want,” replied Harry.

For a long moment, the siren looked into his eyes as if she was trying to read his thoughts. Could she do that? Read his thoughts?

Beads of sweat were trickling down his back as his heart began to race; he could hear it in his ears. Suddenly, the siren was pulled beneath the water. Harry stiffened at once. The ocean was still for a moment, then two sparkling tails burst through the surface. Harry’s jaw fell slack with a soundless scream when he saw another siren sinking her fangs into the first one's neck.

The other siren had bright red hair and a silver tail. There were visible scars all across her pale, lanky arms, and he couldn’t see her face. Legs too stiff to run and hide, he stood on the edge and watched in absolute terror. The scene in front of him was madness as the sirens screeched, their tails flapping, creating violent waves as they sank their claws and teeth into each other’s flesh. Harry could see blood. The first siren was not as strong as the one that was attacking her. He must save her. Maybe a part of him knew that she wasn’t entirely evil. Maybe because she was the only hope for him to get home. Either way, he couldn’t just stand by and watch her die.

Before Harry could even think of a way, a bony hand wrapped around his ankle and dragged him into the sea.

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Harry’s dreams were thick with blood and haunted by the siren’s face. He’d been in the dark water, drowning, and the last thing he’d seen was her sapphire eyes glowing with the sunlight above as she’d stretched out her arm to grab him before he sank deeper. He woke up gasping, still feeling the saltiness of the ocean on his tongue and the pressure of water on his lungs.

He found himself lying on his bed, fully naked under the covers. Had he been dreaming?

Kneading his temple to chase away the headache, Harry scanned his sore eyes around the room and screamed when he saw her sitting in the corner. Naked. He looked away as soon as he caught her ocean blue eyes staring back.

The siren was in his room. And she had legs!

“You’re alive!” she exclaimed.

He heard her standing up but couldn’t bring himself to look. She sat down on the edge of his bed, smelling like the ocean. Not the fishy kind of smell; one that was unique, and Harry liked it even though he shouldn’t.

“This is a dream. This is a dream. This is a dream,” he mumbled to himself while clutching the duvet to his chest.

The siren, now a human girl, let out a sigh. “It’s not. This is real. I’m real.”

“You’re not.”

“Look at me.”

“I can’t.”

“Why?”

“You’re...naked.”

Even though Harry wasn’t looking, he could feel her questioning gaze pinning on him. He grabbed the covers and shoved them at her. “Cover yourself.”

“Oh...okay.” The siren did as she was told as Harry quickly placed a pillow on his private part. He finally looked at her, and she smiled while covering her upper body and the area between her legs with the duvet.

Harry let out a sigh of relief. “Better. Okay, why are you here?”

The siren’s eyes widened. “You don’t remember?”

Harry shook his head.

“We were talking when my sister attacked me, then dragged you into the water. You were lucky I saved you twice and brought you back to where I’d found you. This is the only palace on this beach, so I assumed it was yours.”

Harry sat and stared her face, trying to detect a lie but failed.

The siren rolled her eyes. She seemed disappointed as she swept her long black hair over her shoulder, exposing the huge bite mark on her long pale neck. The skin had healed, and the blood had dried, but the area was still bruised. Harry fought the urge to touch it. There was no way this was really happening.

The siren shot a glance at his ankle. And that was when Harry noticed the red claw mark around it. He shivered at the flashbacks of a siren with red hair and a silver tail charging straight at him with her mouth wide open, her sharp teeth ready to tear off his flesh.

“Sorry about my sister. She could be very...deadly,” the siren in front of him said, looking remorseful.

Harry eyed her up and down once again. Finally, he broke his silence, “What happened to your tail?”

The siren refused to look him in the eye as she said, “My mother found out that I saved you, a human, so she cursed me.”

“Cursed you?”

The siren said nothing; the corners of her mouth lowered as she stared down sadly at her legs.

What kind of The Little Mermaid plot is this? Harry thought to himself, yet didn’t say it because it shouldn’t be a joke. She’d lost her tail, which meant she couldn’t go back to the ocean. Ariel from The Little Mermaid had wished to become a human. This girl had been cursed with the life she never wanted just to save him twice.

Harry buried his face into his palms. “Shit. Fuck. I’m sorry. This is all my fault.”

“It is your fault.”

His head whipped up at her honest response. “You always say what you think, don’t you?”

“Why shouldn’t I?”

Harry sighed and ran his palm over his face. “Never mind. How...how do I get you back to your mermaid form?”

“Siren.”

“Sorry, siren. How do I help turn you back?”

“I don’t know,” she said sadly, clutching the duvet to her chest. “But I need a place to stay until I figure it out.”

Harry thought for a moment and nodded. “I’ll pay for your hotel room.”

“What’s a hotel?” the siren asked, her eyes round. “And why can’t I stay here in your palace? It’s big and you live alone.”

“This is a house, not a palace,” Harry said. “But I’m going back to London tomorrow, and I can’t take you with me.”

“Where is London? I want to see London.”

Seeing her so excited made Harry laugh. “No, you don’t; trust me. It’s not sunny there. Always dark and gloomy and raining.”

“It’s not sunny underwater, either.”

Harry held up a finger and kept his mouth open for a moment as he pondered over what she’d said. “Good point. But I’m still not taking you to London. That’s not a good idea.”

The siren’s eyebrows drew together. “It was your fault I’m in this situation.”

Harry gasped. “You’re so manipulative!”

“I don’t know what it means.”

“It means you say things like that to get me to feel sorry for you, and so I have to help you.”

“Oh, then, yeah, I’m manipulative,” the siren said. “Take me to London with you, or I’ll find you in London and make your life hell.”

Harry tossed his head back and groaned. As if he hadn’t been traumatised enough by all the events that had happened today, now he had to take responsibility for the life of a mythical creature. If he had been a bad guy, he would have just let the government have her and keep her in a lab like that Oscar-winning movie about the dead girl and her fish lover. But Harry wasn’t a villain. Sure, he could be an asshole, but he couldn’t betray someone who’d risked her life to save his. Twice.

Maybe if he’d just say yes and then leave quickly in the morning, he wouldn’t have to deal with her. He’d ask someone to take care of her, pay for a place for her to stay and her food. Her mother would have to take her back eventually. He didn’t know about sirens, but even in the animal kingdom, mothers never abandoned their children.

“Fine, I’ll take you to London,” he said. Seeing the smile on her face, he was lowkey thankful that he was so good at lying. “First, you have to put some clothes on. Wait here.”

Carefully, he slipped out of bed, holding a pillow in front of his crotch and one behind him to cover his butt, then padded awkwardly to his closet to change and get her something to wear. When he returned, she was still sitting on his bed, humming a familiar song and kicking her feet as if testing out her new body parts. He found it endearing, but of course, he wouldn’t tell her.

He handed her a bathrobe. “Put this on. I’ll find some real clothes for you later.”

The siren accepted the bathrobe and stared at it as if she’d been told to put it in her mouth and chew. She glanced up at him. “I don’t understand the purpose of this.”

“To cover up your private parts.”

Suddenly, she seemed sad. “I think I’m broken.”

Harry blinked. “What?”

She looked at him again, pouting. “I don’t have a tail.”

“I can see that.”

“No, I mean, a tail like yours.”

When Harry realised what she meant, his face burned, and he cleared his throat into his fist. “You’re not supposed to,” he said awkwardly. “You’re...a female. I bet male sirens don’t look the same as you, right?”

“There’s no male sirens,” she told him.

Harry cocked his head to the side, squinting his eyes. “Huh? Then how do you guys...you know?”

She blinked innocently at him. She didn’t know.

“Mate.” The word made Harry cringe. “How do you mate?”

“Sirens mate with mermen. We only need them for children.”

“Okay, that’s...new…”

Harry would be glad to find out more, but this was definitely not the right time. He waved his hand, urging her to hurry up. Clumsily, the siren got to her feet. Harry didn’t intend to stay here while she changed, but since she could barely keep her balance, she had to hold onto his arms. He stood there, staring at the ceiling as the duvet dropped. She was completely naked in front of him now and so dangerously close. The voice inside his head was telling him not to peek. Fuck. Why did she have to be sexy?

“Do you...um...do you need help?” he asked as she seemed to be struggling with the bathrobe.

“No, thanks. I got it!” she said between ragged breaths, then, “Hey your tail is growing!”

Harry’s eyes dropped to the front of his boxers, his face heating at the sight of his erection. He gently pushed her back onto the bed and rushed to the bathroom.

“Where are you going?” she shouted after him. “I need to see it in its full form!”

“This is its full form!”

“It’s still small.”

“Shut up! It’s not!”

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Ezili felt bad for lying to this human.

Well, lying was the whole point of her mission, but he had been so nice to her when he found out she couldn’t return to the ocean. She blamed her new human heart for these emotions. Siren Ezili would never feel sorry for this ugly creature. No, wait, this one wasn’t ugly. The mermen were ugly. As much as she despised humans, she must admit that most of them were beautiful.

When this human wasn’t looking, Ezili would regard him with as much curiosity as he had regarded her in secret. The way his brown curls swept back messily. His defined jawlines. The deep dimples in his cheeks. The look of wonder in his eyes. He looked about her age, but his eyes were innocent, greener than seaweed.

She looked away as he caught her gawking. They were sitting at a small table on the floor. The room was darkly lit by the light in the corner. On the table was a mushy pile with little fire sticks on top.

“What is this?” Ezili asked, inspecting the object.

The human smiled at her, the firelight dancing in his leaf-green eyes as he said, “It’s a cake. We’re celebrating my birthday.”

“You told me not to play with fire.”

“We’re gonna put it out anyway.” He winked at her. “A little fire won’t hurt.” Ezili watched the human take out a little black thing and flick his thumb. Fire flared out, making Ezili flinch. “Relax,” he chuckled and the fire vanished. “This is called a lighter. It makes fire. This is a cake. These are candles.”

“What do we do with the cake?”

“We eat it.”

“You eat fire?”

The human laughed at Ezili’s distressed look. “No, silly. We blow out the candles, then eat the cake.”

“Oh,” she said, making him laugh harder. She found it disrespectful and annoying. Was this creature making fun of her? “What’s so funny?” she asked through gritted teeth.

The human stopped laughing, yet his dimples were still visible. “I can’t believe I’m celebrating my twenty-fourth with a siren,” he said.

“Who do you usually celebrate with?” Ezili asked.

“My friends or family,” the human said. “My friends were supposed to be here but their flight got cancelled due to bad weather.” The sadness in his eyes disappeared as he gave a dismissive wave and laughed. “Oh well, it’s not bad being alone. In fact, I’ve been alone my whole life.”

“That’s sad,” Ezili murmured, mesmerized by the candles.

“It’s not,” replied the human. “Some people live their whole life surrounded by others, and yet, they’re still lonely.”

As he closed his eyes, took a deep breath, smiled, and blew out the candles, Ezili sat there and pondered over his last words.

They didn’t eat the cake right away, because the humans said they ought to eat it after dinner. Apparently, humans ate three main meals a day—breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Sirens ate when they were hungry, so this was very new to Ezili. She picked up the small shiny thing that shaped like her mother’s trident and pushed around the foods on her plate. “What is this?”

“Fish,” the human said with a smile.

“Dead?”

“You expect me to eat alive fish?”

Ezili scowled at him. “That’s what we eat.”

“You’re human now. Try cooked fish.”

When she didn’t do anything but stare at the plate, the human nudged her hand with his knuckles. “Come on. If you don’t like it, I’ll get you the raw fish in the fridge.”

Ezili doubted that this imbecile creature would poison her with these colourful foods to get away with his responsibility, but at the same time, nothing was impossible.

However, she would probably faint if she didn’t eat. This dinner actually smelled good, and her stomach was rumbling because she hadn’t eaten since yesterday. And so she stabbed the fish’s burned flesh with her little trident, closed her eyes and put it into her mouth. It was soft, salty and a bit spicy, and...surprisingly delicious. She quickly took another bite, and another, and another.

“Wow, you’re really hungry, huh?” The human chuckled. “You like it?”

Ezili nodded fast, unable to answer because her mouth was full.

The human seemed satisfied. “Good. Means I’m a great cook.”

Ezili chewed fast and swallowed as the human began to eat. She tried to copy the way he held the little trident and the knife, and felt like she’d changed. Her mother would hate her so much for enjoying this. And Koa would make sure everyone in their kingdom knew and turn her into a laughing stock.

“Do you have any questions for me?” she said, breaking the silence, mostly to distract herself from thinking about the mission and her family.

The human thought for a second. “Hmmm, I have a bunch so I don’t know where to start.” Then, after a pause, “Why did your mum do this to you? Doesn’t she love you?”

Ezili wished she could stab him for bringing up the topic she’d been trying to avoid. Instead, she sucked in a breath. “She does. It’s just...the way sirens show love is different from humans. We teach our children to be strong from the moment they are born. Sirens live dependent on one another to survive, and so we always have to look out for one another. I guess that’s love for us. My mother is the Sea Queen. She’s very powerful, and so she has high hopes for my sister and I. My sister is better than me, though. I’ve always envied her.”

“Your sister is scary as hell,” the human remarked. “But if your mum is the Queen, you must be a princess.”

“Yeah.”

“Wow, so does that make me Prince Eric?”

“Your name is Eric?”

“No,” the human chuckled. “It’s a reference from The Little Mermaid. You should watch that film. You’d probably hate it though. Anyway, it’s so weird that we don’t know each other’s name. I’m Harry.” The human, well, Harry, put his hand across the table. Ezili didn’t know what to do with it so she just stared.

“I’m Ezili.”

Harry smiled, picked up her right hand and shook it. His hand was bigger than her and warm. She liked it.

“Cool name. Can I call you Ezi?”

Ezili instantly pulled her hand back. “No, you filthy creature. That’s not my name!”

“Ezi is short for Ezili.”

“What?”

Harry ignored the look of confusion she was giving him. “Or I could call you Bubbles. That’s a cute nickname.”

“Why Bubbles?”

“Because…” He tossed his head back and groaned. “Damn, woman, you gotta read the story, too. I can’t make these jokes if you don’t get the references.”

Ezili had so many questions. Just as she was about to ask, the black thing on the table lit up and started playing a song that startled Ezili.

“Sorry. My mum’s calling,” Harry said as he picked up the thing and swiped his fingers across it. “Right on time.”

“Is your mother trapped in that thing?” Ezili asked, clutching the hem of the shirt Harry had told her to wear. It was too big on her but she loved that it was comfortable and kept her warm.

“No, this is a phone,” Harry said, shaking the magical device with light coming out of it. “So my mum’s in London, and when she calls me on the phone, her voice gets transferred through it, and I can hear what she says.” He pushed himself up and told Ezili, “I’ll be right back.”

Once Harry was gone, Ezili sat there and tried her best to process all the new information. It was only her first night on land and she was already going through it. This mission was harder than she thought. Still, she had no choice but to continue. She must have that heart, and her mother would be so proud.

.

.

.

When Harry woke up this time, he was on his private jet.

“Hey.”

He screamed, causing Ezi to fall back into her seat in front of him. He whipped his head around and saw that they were the only two people in this cabin. Before he could even come up with a question, Ezi got up, her hand resting on either side of his seat as she leaned forward, until her face was so close to his that he could smell the vanilla scent of the cake in her breath.

Her eyes sharpened at once. “I know you were trying to get rid of me.”

“No...I didn’t.”

“You did, Harry. You were going to leave me at your beach house. I heard you talking on the phone last night with someone else after talking to your mum. You mentioned a hotel room.”

Harry had booked a room for her on the phone last night. He should have done it on the website.

“But guess what?” A corner of her mouth lifted. “I might not have the ability to control tides anymore, but I still have my voice. And so I can control humans with it. I sang you to sleep last night. Then when your servants came to take you to this metal bird, I made him carry you to the magic black carriage and I came here with you. You think you’re one step ahead, you’re wrong. Try that again. I dare you.”

Harry swallowed hard. He could feel his palms sweating as he rubbed them against his thighs. “Okay, I’m sorry for that,” he said.  “But you can’t control people like that. If someone found out what you’re capable of...what you are...you’d be in big trouble.”

Ezi arched an eyebrow as she slowly backed away and stood straight with her arms across her chest. Thank God, Harry’s mother called just in time. He immediately got up and excused himself to answer the phone. He left a pouty Ezili in the cabin and went to the exit to talk to his mother.

“My precious boy, are you on the plane right now?”

“Yes, Mum,” Harry sighed.

“Good. I just need the name of your date for the seat arrangement.”

Harry stiffened for a second then quickly glanced over his shoulder to check if Ezi was eavesdropping. Fortunately, she was distracted by a magazine.

“Like now?” he asked his mum.

“Yes. Last night you told me you found one.”

Yes, Harry remembered that part, but he’d only said that so his mum would stop pestering him.

He took a deep breath. “Yeah, I did.”

“Her name?”

He hesitated before saying, “Ezili Hans.”

Hans as in Hans Christian Andersen. The writer of The Little Mermaid. If he had the energy to be happy, he’d give himself a pat on the back for the creativity.

“Great,” his mother said, sounding as if he’d just told her he was getting married. “I’m so excited to meet this girl.”

“No, you’re not.”

“Yes, dear?”

“I-I said ‘Well, of course’,” Harry said and covered it up with a nervous laugh.

When he got off the phone with his mum, he felt a light tap on the shoulder and turned around to see Ezi. Shit, had she listened to–

“I promise I won’t use my singing voice to control you again,” she said, to his surprise. "Please. I cannot survive on my own." She twisted the hem of his band-tee uneasily. Even though she looked super cute in his t-shirt and joggers, she was still too underdressed for someone that was travelling on a private jet.

“Fine. You can stay,” he heard himself say while trying to imagine her with actual clothes that fit her.

Ezi’s blue eyes lit up, and the smile that rarely showed up on her face caught Harry off guard. He almost forgot what was happening.

“Really?”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “But we need to set up some rules.”

[harold231]

It wasn't real

Pairing: Bucky x reader

Posted: 04/30/2021

Word count: 2.5k

Warnings: None? Maybe a lil angst just a lel bet.

A/N: I think it might be good? Idk You let me know. But like frfr, don't just give me feedback in your mind, put it into words. Also I apparently have a thing for Bucky in a dotted apron soooo yeah.

FYI: time zone/era is open for interpretation. Bucky never became an avenger/soldat and steve isn't part of this one.

The wind that blew around you was warm and sweet with the scent of freshly bloomed flowers. Perhaps it was an act of kindness from some God trying to distract you from the cold bitterness settling into your bones. Closing your eyes you conjure the very memory that left you so desolate.

The sun snuck it's way through the curtains to illuminate the room, effectively disturbing the sleep that you always seemed to be craving. Waking up is always hassle but whenever you remember that you get to spend your day with the only person who tolerates you and you him, getting out of bed is the easiest thing. Bucky is crazy and the damn boy is never in one spot for to long and he always has something to say, but you can't imagine how boring your days would be if you guys had never met. well technically if your parents had never met.

When you were a child you parents had to move to new york for business and they decided that Brooklyn was the place to be. You had been Bucky's neighbor and the first day you guys moved in his mom had dragged him over with the most delicious angel food cake that he so proudly claimed to have made mostly on his own. He just loved cooking and baking since forever, he would tell you that he just liked experimenting with foods but you knew the truth was that the boy liked to eat and didn't have the patience to wait for his mother to come home.

Only a few years after your family had moved to Brooklyn you and Bucky had already built an unbreakable bond. You guys had found a beautiful cherry tree one day when playing tag and had deemed it to be your's and Bucky's spot. Whenever you had a bad day or needed time away from the world you guys would go to the tree and just pick cherries, in the winter time you and Bucky would lay under the tree and kick the trunk so that the snow would fall from the leaves. It was the place where at only 15 years old bucky swore he would open his own Bakery and to quote him "I'm serving my ma's food my way doll, It's gonna be the next best thing to hit New York."

You were laying on the ground with your hands crossed behind your head looking up at Bucky swinging upside down from a branch when he told you all this. You felt something you had never felt before at that moment, looking up at the wild haired boy who loved to eat, loved his family, and had the most ambition you had ever heard from kids your age. Your heart felt full and your cheeks grew warm as you looked up at the same blue eyes you had know for years now, only this time you notice the way they twinkle in the sunlight and how rosy his lips are. Now 7 years laters you and Bucky were preparing to open the very bakery he promised you he'd open. Banners were beautifully strung along the walls and cute retro china was set out, ready to be filled for opening day. There was no hesitation from you when Bucky had asked you to run the bakery with him, you were excited to spend your days with the person you hoped you would spend the rest of your life with.

At around 6:30 in the morning you had arrived at the bakery but it seemed that Bucky had beat you to it. The smell of fresh angel food cake and cocoa danced up your nose as soon as you opened the door. Closing your eyes you smiled at the memories that it brought back. Moving to the back you grabbed your Disney themed apron and placed your bag and coat in its place before scurrying over to the kitchen while trying (and failing) to tie your apron. There in all his dorkiness was Bucky wiggling around to the chordettes. He knew that you loved the 50's aesthetic so he found a way to incorporate it without going overboard, by adding little trinkets, a jukebox, and even those cute little dining tables. In fact at the moment he was wearing a ruffly red polka dotted apron as he frosted some cupcakes.

Apron tied, you were finally ready to get to work. You walked up to Bucky bumping his hip as you reached for some cupcake pans, "Whatcha doin here so early Buck, we don't open until 12" he looks at you with squinted eyes, "The hell are you doing here so early." "Woah,woah,woah completely unprovoked. I'm just saying cuz' you were the one complaining about the opening time being set at 8. Like damn." Breathing out a huff of air he wipes his forehead with a towel "I'm sorry doll, I'm just super nervous and I couldn't sleep so I came to start baking things. I already frosted the ice cream cakes and I just finished the pies, but I was thinking that maybe we needed some cupcakes too, even though we already baked so many pastries and stuff last night I'm worried it won't be enough."

Setting down the trays you move to hug Bucky from behind holding him close to you. "Buck I know we'll do great your food is too good to pass up on especially when it's free." You place a soft kiss to his shoulder " I promise you'll do great, everything you do is amazing you try your hardest at everything Buck, You've worked your butt off and made mine considerably larger to get here, don't start losing your mind on me now." A cute little laugh from Bucky lets you know that he's hearing you and he isn't so stressed anymore. "I just want this to be perfect ya know?" with your head still against his back you nod, "I just want it to be a special day for my special girl."

You couldn't stop the slight blush that rose to your cheeks or the way that your heart suddenly started beating three times faster. You had also wanted to make him something special which is why you had got here so early. Finally releasing your hold on Bucky you straighten your apron out before gathering everything you need for some red velvet cupcakes. Bucky loved your red velvet cake so you loved making it for him. After hours of mixing, baking, and frosting had passed, you guys were rewarded with a bakery that looked as great as it smelled. "Alright doll, I'm heading out, I gotta go get ready. Meet you back here at 12 , Love ya." He didn't even give you a chance to answer as he ran right out the door. "Love you too."

You had stayed behind just a little while longer as you perfected your secret project. Carefully you added snowflakes to some of the cupcakes because you knew how much he loved snow even if he hated winter, some cats, flowers that reminded you of bucky, and one extra special cupcake. When you finish you decide to clean up a bit more and prepare some drinks for later before heading home to get ready. As soon as you got home you took a shower and did the simplest of make up with a light pink lip. You had decided to wear a dress to match the blossoming flowers that spring had brought. Pink with a yellow lace trim and flowers embroided all over the dress, matching it with some yellow flats.

You had decided that it was a perfect day for a walk so you grabbed a light scarf and slung it over your shoulders, grabbed Bucky's cupcakes, and headed over to the bakery. You felt as if a Hundred pounds had been lifted from your shoulders knowing that Bucky had felt the same way about you. You had decided that you would tell him today with your special cupcakes. As you rounded the corner you felt giddy and you couldn't wipe the smile from your face no matter how hard you tried. As you reached the bakery you saw that a majority of the people had already arrived and you knew that it would put Bucky at ease to see all the people enjoying his food. You stopped at the window, closing your eyes to take a deep breath to prepare yourself to join the celebration.

Opening your eyes you reached for the handle only to stop at the sight on the other side of the door. Bucky stood there arms wrapped around a woman eyes locked on hers as he leaned in for a kiss. It must have all happened in about 30 seconds but it felt as if time himself had slowed it down for you to watch the way he tilted her head and ran his tongue along her bottom lip before finally uniting their lips. Your heart dropped as quickly as your smile did and suddenly you felt so stupid for thinking this could be real. You willed yourself not to cry as you allowed your legs to carry you anywhere but there.

That's how you found yourself sitting underneath a blossoming cherry tree. A tree that held only happy memories because it wasn't a place you could be sad... back then. With your back against the tree and box of cupcakes full of unrequited love in your lap you realize how much you over romanticized Bucky. Opening the box you decide it would be a shame to let them go to waste. The first one you grab has a big red heart frosted in the middle, you let out a deep sigh before breaking the cupcake right down the middle. You shove half of the cupcake into your mouth and only then do you allow the tears to fall. You sat there for hours crying eating cupcakes, watching the sunset, and thinking about everything that Bucky did for you, as a friend. You realize you had no right to be angry at Bucky, after all you never told him how you felt you just assumed that he would feel the same way after so many years. With every broken memory another cupcake vanished.

He was always there for you, when no one wanted to come to your slumber party Bucky did and he even did all the girly things with you. Painting your nails, doing your hair, watching chick flicks, and pillow fights. once he even asserted that no one could protect you as well as he could, when you had decided to go camping with your friend from class so he insisted on taking you himself. Your friend was most noticeably gay so you had assumed he wanted to spend time alone with you. But now that you think back on those memories these are things that anyone would do for their bestfriend. And that's what you realized 8 hours and 11 cupcakes later.

The moon floated above you and as it's white rays settled upon the lake you decided it might be time to go home now. You get up and dust your dress off before leaning down to grab the mostly empty box. Turning around you are stopped again by what's in front of you. Bucky stands there brows furrowed as his eyes flash from you to the box in your hands. "Where the hell have you been, I've been calling you all day." swallowing the lump in your throat you go to answer but are interrupted. " everyone's been asking me about you all night and I had no damn idea what to tell them, but apparently you were just out here being inconsiderate. You go and tell me I can do great tonight, that you'd be there for me, but you weren't." You try to answer him but are again interrupted. "You could have told me something earlier instead of leaving me there like a dumb-" "SHUT UP!" this time it was your turn to interrupt him.

Taking a deep breath you look into his eyes before explaining. "Of course I was ready to be there today, you think I wore this dress to sit under a damn tree? Well I didn't. When I left my apartment I was ready and I was excited, so excited. I couldn't even stop smiling on my way over, but then I got to the shop and I saw-" Immediately you stopped as you realized what you were about to say. He cocked an eyebrow and shook his head slightly as if to say 'Hello?' "You saw what? What did you see that would make you abandon ship just like that?" Shame flushed through your being and you could no longer keep eye contact. "Nothing, you know what, it doesn't even matter. I'm sorry I was being dramatic I should have been an adult and dealt with it on my own time. And I'm sorry I abandoned you all, but the night was about you anyways."

"The night was supposed to be about the both of us so it does matter if you saw something that made you want to leave. Just tell me doll, what did you see?" his voice is soft as he pleads with you. "I saw... well I saw you kissing that lady and I just wanted get away and ended up here okay!?" You said it all in a jumble hoping that he wouldn't be able to understand what you had said. But luck wasn't your friend so of course he did. "So seeing me kiss another person was so gross to you that you had to run away, what the hell? are you 13 again?" You hadn't admitted it outloud yet and it seemed that the dumbass in front of you was going to force it out of you.

Stepping around Bucky you pull your scarf tight around your body as you focus on not crying anymore until you get home. You distract yourself by thinking of all the love you saw in all the little things Bucky did for you. Dancing around the newly furnished bakery body against body as frank sinatra brought you heart to heart, watching rom-coms and ugly crying together, but by the time you get home you force yourself to face the ugly truth. The Love was always in your head. It wasn't real.

A new wave of tears blurred your vision as teardrops fell perfectly to the ground. "It's because I have feelings for you Bucky, and I now know you don't feel the same way." Sniffling you don't bother looking up because your heart is to broken for that right now. "I'm Just gonna need a little bit of time and I'll be back good as new like nothing even happened." Still unable to lift your gaze from the ground you decide to focus on the last cupcake left in the box. 'I Love You' is written in tiny light blue frosting letters. "I uhm, uhh." That brought your attention to Bucky, as embarrassment pulsed as strong as ever through your veins. " You don't have to say anything Buck, It's fine, I'll see you next week, on monday" you hand him the box as you go to pass him "I think you would have a better use for this than me I ate 11 others already so."

Divider credits: @firefly-graphics

[fallingfavourites]

- SUMMER NIGHTS -

"Summer heat, boy and girl meet.."

part 1/5 - full series

Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader

word count: 2,3k

Warnings: my first language isn't English so probably some mistakes, I feel like I used y/n alot writing this, badly writing asshole boys, some oc side characters their just their for plot nothing more, some kisses not very detailed though, everyone is out of character probably even y/n sometimes, I wrote the start last month and finished the rest today so probably some inconsistency, let me know if I missed anything!!

A/n: this was supposed to go out last month my bad- I really need to start getting more constant with my writing, I'm planning out chapter 2 rn though so hopefully that will come out sooner than this! let me know what you guys think of this!! please I love reactions&lt;3

!everything in italics is a flashback fyi!

"Steve, babe, you're staring." She whispered, not taking her eyes off of him. 

A breeze of salty California air blew through their hair. The warm sun shined down on them. Sand and water flew off their bare feet as he ran after her across the seashore. Their laughter was full of happiness. When Steve got close enough, he wrapped his arms around her waist. Y/n couldn't help but let out a squeal.

He spun her around so he could look into her eyes. The same eyes he has been lost in the whole summer. The same eyes he hoped to be lost in forever. And just like clockwork, the second Steve's hazel eyes met Y/n's e/c eyes, he was lost. Lost in a deep sea of e/c.

He was drowning in it. And if this was what drowning felt like, he never wanted to take a breath of fresh air ever again. Y/n wrapped her arms around him to play with the short hairs on his neck and beamed at him. 

"I'm gazing." He replied in the same hushed tone. 

"It's creepy."

"It's romantic," Steve said, leaning forward. Tilting his head slightly as his lips meet Y/n's. His hand moves from her waist to the back of her neck. Just as Steve is about to deepen the kiss, Y/n places her hands on his bare chest and pushes him back. She couldn't help the grin on her face as she saw his confused look. Y/n took his hand from her neck and held it in her own. She gave Steve one last mischievous look before she started to run into the cold, salty water. 

Y/n had taken her mother's polaroid camera with her and refused to stop taking pictures. Most of them were of Steve clearly trying his best to impress her. In all of them, he was flexing his muscles with a smoldering look on his face.

His hair obviously looked flawless in each picture. At least to her it did, he would disagree. While sitting on the warm sand, they started building a sand castle. The biggest one they could make. After a few hours of throwing bits of sand at the other and working on the castle, it was finally finished. Y/n shot up from where she was sitting. 

"There's so much sand in my hair!" He complained with a groan. Hearing the muffled laughter that he's normally so fond of, made his head snap to the h/c girl. 

"Let me take a picture!" She exclaimed with a bright smile. Steve couldn't help the smile that grew on his sandy face. Seeing her so excited smile like a kid in a candy store made him feel warm inside. It was a gift she had. She could light up a room with just a simple smile.

Steve also got up from his place and started posing in front of the sand castle. Y/n laughed softly at the different poses he did for her. While doing these poses, Steve miss stepped and fell backward. Directly on top of the newly built sand castle. Y/n let out a shocked gasp. A smile slowly crept on her face. 

"Don't you dare take a picture!" He says, pointing at her as he tries to fight the smile that's making its way on his face. Y/n quickly snapped a picture of him with the camera. 

"Too late." She spoke softly, faking an innocent smile at him. 

"Oohh your ass is grass L/n!" He says playfully, getting up he doesn't even bother wiping off the sand first. Steve runs straight to Y/n. She yelps out his name as he grabs her. He kisses her, making her drop the polaroid camera on the soft sand. His lips felt so comforting, they were soft and felt like home. His kisses made her forget everything. Like the fact that they only had a week left of summer vacation. Neither of them wanted to think about it. They knew summer love couldn't be forever but part of them held out hope. That maybe someway, somehow they could say with each other.

"I'm going back to Indiana tonight." Steve sighed, he had been trying to avoid this conversation, they both had. "I know" Y/n mumbles sadness washing over her as the waves washed over the sand. 

The last day of summer was something both teenagers were dreading. Not because of high school starting again but because they wouldn't be able to see each other again. It all had happened so fast. Most days were spent at the beach, and they had gone to the arcade a few times where he had taken her bowling. They had gone on long walks with Steve never letting go of her hand, no matter how hot it was that day.

Y/n was staring at the sunset in front of her. The sun wasn't as warm anymore, and the wind was even colder than before. She couldn't help but reminisce about the past weeks. Steve kissing her jawline are what made her snap out of the memories. He had his arms wrapped around her from behind. Her back was leaning against his chest. The warmth of his body kept her warm on the last night of the summer. 

"We'll still be..." He paused for a second not knowing the right word, "friends right?" He asked, feeling weird about using the word friends but he wouldn't know what else to call what they had. Did he love her or was it just a summer fling? The question had been plaguing his mind the past few days. Only deep down he did know the right words. He knew he loved her. Y/n turned her head around to look at him. She hadn't expected him to use that word. Y/n had known she loved Steve the second she laid her eyes on him. 

"Yeah... yeah, of course." She said mindlessly, trying to ignore the tears that formed in her eyes. Y/n couldn't tell if she was about to cry because of Steve calling them friends or because she knew that she would never see him after tonight. Steve said her name as he placed his hand on her cheek, making her turn around slightly. 

"Y/n/n I- I love y-" Steve gets cut off before he can finish his love confession.

"Yes, Steve?" She whispered not sure if she could trust her own voice. He closed and opened his mouth a few times, not being able to find the right words. His lips crashed on hers. Y/n was taken aback, to say the least. For a second she was frozen, lost in the lust of the kiss. Steve pulled back from the kiss, leaning his forehead against Y/n's. 

"Steve don't say that," Y/n said, the sadness clear in her voice.

"What?" Steve scooted back on the rock. Was he wrong for thinking she felt the same? Was he in over his head? His eyebrows scrunched together as he tried to figure it out.

"Say it to me the next time we see each other." She says, leaning forward to kiss him. Steve places his palm on the side of her face to stop her.

"What if we never see each other?" He questions.

"We will, I know it." Y/n says, trying to convince Steve. And even though she would never admit it, she was trying to convince herself as well. She and Steve had a connection, she just hoped it would be strong enough to find each other again.

Steve smiles at her and it makes her smile immediately. With the same hand he had stopped her earlier, he pulls her towards him. Their lips meet and this kiss isn't anything like the ones they've shared before. It's despaired, the fear in both of their heads that this most likely will be their last kiss. 

Steve had tried his best to forget about Y/n. But she just wouldn't leave his head. He didn't know how he would make it through this year if she was the only thing on his mind. Arriving at Hawkins high school after six weeks felt good. In some ways, he had missed it. Two things he certainly didn't miss were Carol and Tommy H on his ass every single day. He saw Tommy sitting with a few guys from the basketball team.

Summer was over, high school had just begun again and Y/n hadn't stopped thinking about the last kiss. After she got home that night she felt so stupid. Why didn't she just let Steve say it? Why did she have to ruin it for herself? She knew she would never see him again, why couldn't she just have enjoyed that moment. Shaking her head she places some shirts into her bag.

Just after Steve left her parents had told her she was going to live with her aunt for a while because they had to leave the state for work. And of course, her aunt had to live in the middle of nowhere. Some place called Hawkins. A part of her was excited since it was in Indiana, and the hopes of Steve living in that town were small. As she picks up another shirt she notices her favorite of the pictures she took at the beach. Steve was laying down in the sand. The sun hit him perfectly and made him look like a greek god. He hadn't noticed her taking the picture, that's what made it her favorite.

Hearing her mom calling out for her from downstairs, saying that her aunt has arrived. She quickly places the picture in her bag and finishes packing. Rushing down the stairs she says goodbye to her parents and gets into the car with her aunt.

"The King has arrived," Tommy exclaimed as he saw Steve approaching them. "How was your summer man?" He asks hoping to get some dirty details.

"Oh, you know, nothing special." Steve tries to shrug it off.

"Come on Harrington! Something is different about you," Mark says as the rest of the team hums in agreement, "Just tell us." Steve shakes his head at the guys with a smile. He runs his hand through his hair as he tries to think of something. Not planning on telling them about Y/n.

"Oh shit, you meet a girl didn't you?" Kevin says, a proud smile on his face. Steve knew there was no denying it now.

"Yeah, yeah I did." Steve tries to play it cool as some of the guys give him a pat on the back, while the others whistle. 

"So how was she?" Paul asks raising his eyebrows a few times in a suggesting way.

"You mean who was she?" Gary questions innocently. 

"No no, I think he meant what he said Gar." Mark Laughs as he places an arm around Gary and sends him a wink. Steve shakes his head at them. He had already been expecting them to act this way. 

Y/n walked over to the entrance of her new school. Hawkins high didn't look too horrible. She minded her own business as she made her way over to the big doors.

"God she was the nicest-" Steve cuts himself off, not wanting to look whipped in front of his mates, "in bed. I mean wow! California girls are certainly something else. The guys around him laugh as one after the other keeps asking more questions. Deep down Steve felt bad for talking about Y/n in this way, he knew it was wrong even though he was making it all up. 

"Hey! you there!" She heard someone say from behind her. Turning around she realise some girl and her friends were waving her over, "Yeah you new girl!" The brunette girl said. Y/n walks up to the group of girls. 

"You are so pretty! oh my god!" The girl says before introducing herself, "I'm Carol, and they are Tina, Debbie, and Bonnie." She says as she points to herself and the girls next to her.

"I'm Y/n, I just moved from California." Y/n says smiling at the girls in front of her.

"Omg Y/n is such a pretty name." Debbie gasps as she plays with her curly blonde hair. 

"How was your summer Y/n?" Bonnie asks, clearly hoping for an interesting story.

"Well, I met this really, really cute guy," Y/n begins, a bright smile on her face, "We practically spent the whole summer on the beach, he took me bowling, we went on strolls and drank lemonade. It all just was perfect." She sighs as she thinks back to those summer nights. 

"Girl, you have to tell us everything!" Tina exclaims. And so she does. Y/n tells the new girls she just met about how well he treated her and how he could do no harm.

"Nancy you have to hear this!" Carol calls over the brunette girl with blue eyes as Y/n tells her story. Nancy hesitates a second but finally makes her way over to the group. "Y/n this is Nancy, Nancy this is Y/n, she's telling us about this beyond amazing guy she met this summer." Nancy and Y/n share a small wave with each other before she continues her story. The school bell rings just as Y/n reaches the end of her story. 

"He sounds so dreamy!" Debbie says, "Nothing like the guys we have over here." Carol, Tina, and Bonnie sigh in agreement

"What was his name?" Nancy asks as she ignores the other girls. 

"Steve," Y/n smiles softly while saying his name, "Steve Harrington." The girls around her let out a shocked gasp. "What? What is it?" Y/n asks, confused by their reaction. Just as Nancy is about to open her mouth she gets shoved by Carol, a sign for her to not say anything. 

"It's nothing, they probably were just scared by a bee," Carol says with a charming smile on her face, "How about you start hanging out with us Y/n?" She asks as she hangs her arm around Y/n's shoulder.

"Sure, sure sounds good." Y/n quickly says, she would certainly need the friends with being at a new school and all. Plus who would say no when someone asks to be your friend. As the girls walked over to their classes the subject of the conversation quickly changed to how hot Danny Zuko was in the movie Grease.