#just aaaaaahhhhhh
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(Outer wilds spoilers in the following ramblings)
Do you think that, in his final moments, Escall blamed himself for everything that happened to his clan. If he had let Filix send out that message before warping, maybe help would've arrived sooner. If he hadn't been so rash to warp to the eye's approximate location.
Even blaming himself for the things that were completely out of his control like them warping into Dark Bramble bc of its space-bending properties. Or that pod 3 was forced to follow the closer vessel beacon signal bc they wouldn't have enough oxygen to make it to the further one.
That recording you find at the Nomai grave wasn't even done by Escall, it was Secca. While the group's dearest hope was that the rest of the pods reached safety, Escall probably died, full of regret that his actions led his clan to this
#I'm half awake bc work has me exhausted but like I'm thinking about poor Escall man#what happened to them was such a freak accident but Escall being the leader of his clan probably felt like he bears the most responsibility#just aaaaaahhhhhh#the nomai grave itself just makes my heart hurt :(#like what a fucking horrific and tragic death....#outer wilds#outer wilds spoilers
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whateverrrr i dont even like them i dont even think about them ever
#head in hands#AAAHHHH ISAFRIIIN ISAFRIN SIFFRIN ISABEAU AAAAAAHHHHHH#in stars and time#isat#isafrin#isat siffrin#isat isabeau#this drawing was originally a kiss...#and its funny cause its not the first time i start a sketch of them kissing which eventually turns into a sketch of them being silly#i suck at drawing kisses so that might be one of the reasons#but also i just really like drawing them being silly#circus art time
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Can't stop thinking about Logan and Kurt running through the snowy canadian woods, playing chase, climbing trees, trying to pounce on each other, giggling, panting, all while Running With The Wolves by AURORA plays in the background and it's the exact moment that Logan thinks.. that for the first time..
He feels free.
(Bonus points if they encounter any of the wolves that Logan has lived with before.)
Sure, He used to run through the woods with Victor, but it wasn't ever like this. It was always a competition. A race. A fight for first place. To prove their silent war of dominance that Victor often lost at. But this is... a game. They're playing. Smiling. Laughing even at the dumbest things.
No one bats an eye if the blue guy with a tail runs on all fours or jumps at you from a tree but the moment Logan does it, it's unprofessional and he's "not controlling himself" but the thing is. During these games.. he feels more incontrol than he normally does. His pupils widdening, his head naturally lowering, his hands feeling the ground, ears pricked up as he hears every movement, every breath of the other. He can smell him. Out of the thousands of scents around him, his draws him like a deer to a salt block. He digs his claws into the trees, climbing them with such silence like he was taught in Japan, staying still, slowing his breaths until Kurt gets curious and comes looking for him.
"Logan??" He makes the mistake of asking, letting the feral man's eyes lock on like a lynx during the night hunt. Which is exactly what this was. A hunt late at night. A game meant to ware them both out enough to sleep through the night.
Just as his tail flickers and Kurt's ear picks up the sound of a branch, Logan is already on top of him, heaving with heavy breaths. His claw is next to his head, deep into the ground, his other hand holding him down on his chest. Snarling in his face, Logan's high of truthful violence showing through such narrowed eyes only to smirk playfully. "You're dead." He states, stating his victory.
Kurt flinches at first, Gasping, because Father forgive him for this, but God damn who wouldn't be? To be spooked and a man like Logan slamming you to the ground? He had not a single thought about Logan hurting him, but his body's natural response only feeds Logan's feral desires. Truth be told, he liked when people stunk of fear only for it to become drowned in a thick creamy vanilla scent- or in Kurt's sake, Wine, oils and what he could only imagine sunshine smelled like.
Smiling widely, Kurt giggles an instantly later, his tail flickering excitedly only to pretend to be dead, drimatically sticking out his tounge with a "bleh."
The canadian scoffs, rolling his eyes. The idea comes to his mind of just how close they are. He could.. No. It was just the endorphins talking. The rush of the hunt. Besides. He couldn't bite Kurt. It would hurt him too badly.
So he does what every rational friend does. Pulls away. Though the moment he does, as if he could read his mind, four fingers wrap around his head and kisses him. The next best thing.
Despite the fact that it is Kurt who lost, it's always him who knows how just to handle that wild beast trapped inside of him. By letting him out and throwing away the key.
While others locked him up, Kurt took him on walks. If... you know.. those said walks included somehow always making out in the snow afterward...
#logan howlett#wolverine#kurt wagner#nightcrawler#nightwolves#nightclaws#logurt#victor creed#AAAAAAHHHHHH#wolverine x men#x men wolverine#x men nightcrawler#nightcrawler x men#This is also the 37th beer that kurt owes Logan. He lets him win often but just as much he is fooled into losing#As someone who was once a slave. Kurt wouldn't dare tell Logan to lock up his trueself.#SoundCloud
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Jere from Vantaa in Backas, Vantaa
#aaaaaahhhhhh he is so hot as blonde#still miss the black bowlcut#I got so many good video clips#I just need to edit them and subtitle his rants 💀#gonna take a while#he was very chatty today#käärijä#my pics
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OH. MY GOD.
i dont have the words to describe what i feel
#AAAAAAHHHHHH#speechless#need him#i swear i had my clothes on just a second ago#jude bellingham#real madrid#bellingham
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youtube
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD
AUGUST 30TH! AAAAHHHH
LITERALLY 21 DAYS!!
@thekingofworems @nyx-of-darkness-1620 @aaronofithaca05 @theghostnamedspecter @imobsessedwiththeatre @rosegoldenatlas @alphabetical-az @jarondont @magicalmyths @a-fucking-tornado DROP WHATEVER YOU’RE DOING AND WATCH THIS RIGHT NOW!!!
#aaaaaahhhhhh#oh my god oh my god#i’m freaking out#i’m freaking the fuck out#i can’t wait#august 30th cannot come fast enough#ONLY TWENTY ONE DAYS#THIS WILL BE MY FAVORITE SAGA#TELEMACHUS#ATHENA#THE SUITORS#LEGENDARY#LITTLE WOLF#WE’LL DO FINE#LOVE IN PARADISE#GOD GAMES#I’M SO EXCITED FOR THIS FUCKING SAGA#please excuse the caplock#i’m just freaking out#epic#epic musical#epic the musical#epic: the musical#epic the wisdom saga#epic: the wisdom saga#jorge rivera herrans
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no but aki gets so so sweet after you've had sex, he's unable to take his eyes off of you the whole time he's laying beside you and catching his breath. he's got the softest expression on his face, he's smiley and giddy, his cheeks are warm. he hugs you close and kisses your forehead, he asks you what he can do for you and you're not afraid to say it because you know aki wants nothing more than to give you everything you ask for.
#he'll carry you to the bathroom and while you're showering he'll lay out some clean warm clothes for you to wear when you get out#he'll hold you and rub your back while you talk#he always brings you water or offers to make you something to eat#okay but... I don't know why... the thought of aki cooking you a meal after.....#why's it such an attractive thought#maybe I just love food LOL#aaaaaahhhhhh aki........#he'd really be so smitten with you...#he tells you he loves you and you're like 'aki you just said that five seconds ago'#'but it's true'#many akis in my head tonight many akis.....#aki <3
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got my top surgery date this week (march 6!!) which still doesn't seem entirely real
and last night I got offered an interview for my literal dream job for the summer. at like... one of the most competitive orgs in the country
I have so much work to do but I'm sitting here vibrating with excitement and anxiety and possibly several other emotions known only to shrimp
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So you may have seen the Lunacy fanbinds from @webspite that I reblogged recently. He had offered one of the copies to me, and I am now absolutely delighted to have a handcrafted physical copy of Lunacy:
(pls ignore that I desperately need to touch up my fingernail polish I've been doing a lot of moving things around this week)
This is an absolute work of art to hold, and genuinely as someone whose artistic expression is almost entirely writing simply having something I wrote in a physical form means more than words can say; this to me is a gift I will treasure for a long, long time - just knowing that they would have a copy when they asked permission to do one meant the world to me, but now I have my very own and I want to cry happy tears about it.
But wait, there's more!
Not limiting themself to one staggering gift, @webspite had another, equally impressive one! A scrapbook spellbook, equally handcrafted, which will serve me well for notetaking and brainstorming for years to come!:
Every time I look in this, I'm discovering some new surprise and treasure that was left to be found, but my absolute favorite is tucked right within the front cover:
I once described Boggy and Moonlight cuddling on a crescent moon as my perfect cover art for Lunacy, and this is so very good! They look very chill and happy together. <3
Another example, a pocketful of stickers, including a princely frog that could be Boggy getting his due recognition or could be Gerard just chilling out before his morning workout.
A few more pictures of some of the many types of pages within this. It's hard to capture how great it feels in person, but hopefully I've gotten some sense across.
Y'all I'm going to be insufferable with happiness for so long from this. Thank you so so so much to Duck!
#fan binding#spellbook scrapbook#boggy the froggy#lunacy#aaaaaahhhhhh i genuinely just am overwhelmed by the awesomeness of this#it's SO cool and the photos themselves are still cool but they don't fully give a sense of just how AMAZING these feel#duck#thank yooooou
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Kazuki’s reaction is all of our reactions
#AAAAAAHHHHHH#THIS EPISODE OMGGGGGG#idk how much more I can take of this show before I just straight up die#kurusuwa family#that���s what I’m calling them from now on#because they’re FAMILY gotdammit#buddy daddies#buddy daddies anime#suwa rei#kurusu kazuki#unasaka miri#rei suwa#kazuki kurusu#miri unasaka#buddy daddies episode 9#buddy daddies spoilers#buddy daddies screencaps
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The devs are gonna need to hold an overnight brainstorm session to figure out how top Rufus and Cloud's flirty interactions in Part 3 to be even better than the one in "Remake" and "Rebirth". XD If you've searched for Rufus/Cloud tweets on Twitter, I see people talking about how some fans were pleasantly surprised by them flirting, and some had to pause the game to process the fact they're witnessing a seduction in the middle of a boss fight. I love these two dorks so much and want to see more!
I’m REALLY curious about it, because there are a handful more incidents in original canon in which Rufus injects himself into the fray (Rocket Town and Northern Crater, especially). I’d love for them to meet again while Cloud still has his wits about him, but as it stands, he’s got a lot of spiraling to do in part 3 before things hit an upswing. Rocket Town is probably the last, best place for them to clash before Cloud is kinda lost to the thrall for a while (unless the devs add a ton to Wutai, which seems highly plausible given Rufus’ meddling in their politics).
And damn am I nervous to have to sit through the culmination of Midgar vs. Diamond Weapon…I’ll be biting my nails the whole way through…
In short, I agree, I hope they find a way to sneak some more in, I wouldn’t be opposed at all!
#rufus shinra#cloud strife#rucloud#strifra#rukura#ff7r#although game 3 is going to be just climax and falling action#there’s still SO MUCH game to cram in#plus whatever added arcs they need to tie up that weren’t in the original#aaaaaahhhhhh#excited but also NERVOUS
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EVERY TIME I REWATCH THE SPORTS FESTIVAL THE MORE I WANNA GIVE SHOTO A HUG GODDAMNIT
#shoto todoroki#I JUST WANNA ADOPT HIM AND SHIGGY#PLEASE#I LOVE HIM SO MUCH#I JUST FORGET HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM#CAN I GIVE REI A HUG TOO?#AAAAAAHHHHHH#mha#bnha#my hero academia
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Bad boy big brother Jerome and goody-two-shoes little brother Jeremiah
Of course Jerome just loves corrupting sweet things that his mother thinks are just absolutely perfect and can do no wrong.
SO MANY IDEAS
I shall ramble more about one in particular under the cut🙃
(fair warning for incest and horny if it's not already obvious lol)
Give them like three or four years difference. Growing up, Jeremiah is the perfect son while Jerome is outcast and abused- except by his brother. Jeremiah (starting at only two years old) always hung on him, followed him around like a shadow even when Jerome snapped and hurt him. He'd cry, Jerome would get punished, and then Jeremiah was clinging onto him again with pitiful little apologies.
Eventually, Jerome gets used to it and secretly starts to like it. He does sometimes convince Jeremiah to cause trouble to watch him get punished. It backfired a lot.
Jeremiah, by five-years-old, when Jerome is forced to care for him 24/7, has taken on the task of protecting his big brother from the abuse. Whenever Jerome wants to do something he knows they shouldn't, he begs and begs him not to- if it doesn't work, he dives in right beside him. Still, he's hardly ever punished. The blame is always on Jerome. He's the older of the two and should know better. And he's always the one up to no good anyway, dragging his brother down with him. Jeremiah really ought to get away from him before he becomes just like Jerome.
The comments he overhears only make him cling to his brother more. He doesn't think Jerome is bad or stupid or anything the others say. When he got mean it was only to protect him, well...most of the time.
Jeremiah's ten when he finds out you're not supposed to kiss your brother on the mouth. But he likes to see Jerome smile afterwards, so he'll keep their secret.
Jeremiah's twelve when they move out of Haley's Circus and into Gotham. Uncle Zach finally scraped enough together to buy his own diner. And a smart boy like Jeremiah should really be in school where he can expand his knowledge and have a real chance at life (a real chance of making them money).
Jerome hates their apartment, hates being stuck in one place, hates that Jeremiah's at school or studying all the time now. One night, after Jeremiah's fallen asleep curled up against him, Jerome kisses his forehead and leaves without a word.
Jeremiah gets a postcard now and then, a gift on his birthday and Christmas, and nothing else. No letters or explanations or phone calls. Abandoned and alone, all he can do is listen to his mother's thanks for Jerome's absence and throw himself into his studies.
A few days before Christmas, seventeen now, Jeremiah receives another postcard. It's from Gotham. He goes to school, fidgety and in another world as he wonders if Jerome will visit him. Maybe he'd just run into him on the street, if he ever actually went anywhere other than school, the library once in a blue moon, and home.
Now either Jerome comes to pick him up from school or Jerome's waiting at home for him- either way, Jeremiah isn't sure if he wants to hug or slap him. Why not both tho honestly. He doesn't cling the way he did as a child- meaning literally hanging onto him- but he stays in his presence. And tries not to ogle him too much. Can't really help it tho and could you blame him? Jerome lounging back on the couch in a leather jacket with his T-shirt riding up, a cigarette in his mouth and those eyes almost always on Jeremiah like a predator watching its prey and he keeps touching him with his rough hands that could mark and bruise and hold him down and now he's twirling a knife around his fingers like he thinks he's some badass and he is really he's a dangerous predator and Jeremiah can't get enough
Jerome claims his top bunk again (that Jeremiah slept in until Jerome's scent faded and he hadn't touched it since). Jeremiah can't sleep, he just stares at the bunk above him wondering if Jerome was thinking of him too. How often had he thought of Jeremiah while he was gone? Was he even sorry he left without a goodbye? Did he even care that he broke Jeremiah's heart? Did he miss all their secret moments that Jeremiah hadn't been able to forget no matter how hard he tried because it fucking hurt so much why did Jerome leave why did he abandon him why didn't he take Jeremiah with him
Actually I think now would be a better time for Jerome to pick him up from school. Jerome's passed out when he leaves for school and he has a bit of a rough day, but then Jerome comes to get him and all the questions he's been stewing over just come spilling out until he's crying in Jerome's truck after beating on his shoulder for a few minutes.
But of course Jerome missed him. He loved him so much and it hurt to leave, but he couldn't stay. He could barely support himself, how could he have supported Jeremiah too? He just needed to get on his own two feet and then come back to him. And how could he say goodbye to the only one he's ever loved? But of course he missed him, of course he loved him. Jeremiah's his little brother- he'd burn the whole world down for him.
And finally they have sappy, sniffly kisses that escalate into making out that escalates to grinding and marking and stripping-
Now they just have to hide all this from Lila and Uncle Zach during the break
(how that all would end, no idea, I just want them to sneak around having sex while Lila thinks Jeremiah is the pinnacle of purity but really he's a fallen angel corrupted by the lure of the devil)
#jerome valeska#jeremiah valeska#valeskacest#AAAAAAHHHHHH#i really wanna write this now but i could not do it justice omgggg#and another idea that's pretty similar but Jeremiah's just sluttier and they're not as close in their childhood or Jerome's gone longer#im gonna bite something i love these two so much 😭#might make another post for the other idea... not rn cause i should try to sleep but soon
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i get to be such a good boy today >:3
#set up a last minute impact scene with an older butch i’ve been talking to for a hot second#DRAG BDAY IMPACT PLAY#my curse of talking to aromantic ppl strikes again tho#luckily i literally just wanna get hit. be puppied. and talk tho ;w; low pressure#but i can’t wait to wake up tomorrow and feel it i- *wags tail* 😵💫 aaaaaahhhhhh#since i’m not fucking anyone i’m literally just being a pain slut. i love this era
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Current WIPs (as in I have chapters partially written):
Starting Fires, ch 10 (cyberpunk)
Bonds of Smoke and Steel, ch 7 (FO4)
The Paths You Take, ch 30 (ME:A)
Stardew Effect, Y1S20, (ME/SDV AU)
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I’m so close on some of them too. But it’s so hard to get into a groove 😭
#if I can just#PICK ONE#and FINISH IT#maybe I’ll shake out enough of a groove to do more#aaaaaahhhhhh
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I’ve been on a very specific Russian salad and potatoes grind lately
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