#just a little joking jokester

[lockitgirl]

happy yaoimas i did this at the hospital

[an-architect-of-words]

There is suddenly someone spreading Christopher Hartley hate on Reddit, and I don’t know whether to bitterly sob or be proud— because the hate drew out just how much love there is for Chris on the subreddit. 😂 So many comments talking about his glowing good points. I am well FED on this day.

[sleepygaymerdisease]

wish my cats a happy birthday todayyyy

[i-am-3mm3t]

joltik bad

That is my entire species you are insulting! I now have no choice...

anon bad

[girl-bateman]

Fun (not so fun) fact (yes, its worth reading to the end): when I went to the mcr concert last summer I somehow convinced my "old money lana del ray aesthetic" sister to join me in the 8 hour long line of fellow emos. my sister had borrowed my dad's concert pass so that she wouldn't have to pay but there was one crucial problem- my sister is not a 50 year old man like on the photo. this isn't the fun fact tho because the guy lets her pass with nothing more but an amused look. the fun fact comes several months after the fact. because my dad, being the jokester he is, actually picked a picture of him AND his colleague for the concert pass. as faith would have it this is the same colleague who turned out to be an murderer and chopped up another fellow colleague of his. so yeah, a convicted murderer was a essential part of my first mcr concert.

[promisedcandy]

imagining the most heart-wrenching scenario between blorbo mcgee and mr. sckrunkleton. i’m goingng to throw up

[archivist-the-knight]

people about dc + marvel comics now: what?? a pregnant woman as spider man? a guy who gets his powers from cocaine? a comic centering around joker being PREGNANT thats clearly not meant to be taken seriously??? a character whos digestive track is a bunch of worms? WHY DID THEY MAKE THIS??? what has comics come to??? they're making it all uninteresting now!!

comics back in the day and also now: batman meets an alien version of himself that has superpowers and looks like a mcdonalds mascot. there is a batman imp with a siggle for a logo that in the original comic he appeared in was basically a matchmaker/dating expert but in recent editions became the voice of reason for said alien version. an x-men guy that people thought was so ugly they didnt even call him by his name when his superpower was literally just having three faces. batman being burned at the stake. JOKER ONCE KIDNAPPED ALL THE BABIES IN GOTHAM AND YOU'RE HUNG UP ABOUT THE JONKLER BEING GREGNANT

[fanfictionismyaddiction]

When Sweet Turns Sour

Word count: 1.8k

Pairing: lando norris x girlfriend!reader

Summary: Lando's intense love and jealousy, while initially endearing, gradually strain his relationship as his insecurities begin to overshadow their happiness.

Warnings: jealousy, possessiveness, emotional strain, insecurities, emotional manipulation

________________________________________________________

A Little Jealousy Never Hurt Anyone

You and Lando had been dating for almost a year now, and it was nothing short of amazing. He was everything you ever wanted—funny, caring, and incredibly sweet. Sure, dating a Formula 1 driver came with its own set of challenges, but you knew what you were signing up for when you fell for him.

One thing you didn’t quite expect, however, was just how jealous he could get. It started out as little things—like the time you were chatting with his teammate, Carlos Sainz, at a race weekend. Lando had walked up, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you into his side.

“Hey, lovebirds, what are you talking about?” he asked with a smile, though you noticed the way his grip on your waist tightened just a little.

“Just the race,” you replied, not thinking much of it. Carlos had simply been asking about your thoughts on the track, and you’d given your honest opinion. But Lando’s smile didn’t quite reach his eyes.

“Yeah, well, don’t let him bore you with too much car talk,” Lando joked, but the slight edge in his tone didn’t go unnoticed.

You found it endearing at first—how protective he was, how he seemed to care so much about who you talked to and how close you were to others. It made you feel special, like you were his number one priority. But as time went on, the jealousy started to wear on you.

Sweet Turns Sour

It was after a particularly long day at the track that things took a turn. You were at a team event, mingling with the drivers and their partners. Lando was busy chatting with some of the engineers, so you found yourself in a conversation with Daniel Ricciardo, who always had a way of making you laugh.

“Honestly, the way Lando handled that corner today was brilliant,” Daniel said, shaking his head with admiration. “But you should’ve seen his face when he crossed the finish line—priceless.”

You chuckled, picturing Lando’s victorious grin. “He does have a way of making everything look easy.”

As you continued talking, you didn’t notice Lando approaching until he was right beside you. His smile was forced, and there was a certain tension in his posture that you’d come to recognize.

“Hey, mate, mind if I steal my girlfriend back?” Lando’s tone was light, but the underlying message was clear.

Daniel, ever the jokester, raised his hands in mock surrender. “All yours, mate. All yours.”

You felt a little embarrassed as Daniel walked away, sensing the jealousy radiating off Lando. As soon as you were alone, Lando pulled you into a tight embrace, burying his face in your neck. His breath was warm against your skin, but his grip was almost too firm, as if he was trying to remind you that you were his.

“You okay?” you asked, running your fingers through his hair in a soothing motion.

“Yeah, just missed you,” he mumbled, though you could hear the strain in his voice. “I don’t like it when other guys make you laugh like that.”

You smiled, trying to reassure him. “You’re the only one who can really make me laugh, Lando.”

The Overprotective Side

It wasn’t long after the Daniel incident that another side of Lando’s jealousy began to emerge—his overprotectiveness. You were out shopping one afternoon, enjoying the rare downtime together. As you were browsing through clothes in a store, a friendly shop assistant approached you, offering help. He was polite, probably in his mid-twenties, and just doing his job.

But Lando’s eyes narrowed the moment the guy started talking to you. The assistant complimented a dress you were holding, saying it would look great on you. Before you could even respond, Lando stepped forward, placing himself between you and the assistant.

“She doesn’t need any help, thanks,” Lando said curtly, wrapping an arm around your shoulders possessively.

The assistant blinked, taken aback by Lando’s abruptness. “Of course, just let me know if you need anything,” he said before quickly retreating.

“Lando, that was a bit much, don’t you think?” you asked gently once the assistant was out of earshot.

Lando sighed, his expression softening as he looked at you. “I’m sorry. I just… I don’t like the way he was looking at you.”

“He was just being nice,” you pointed out, but Lando’s jaw tightened.

“Maybe. But you’re mine, and I don’t want anyone else thinking they have a chance,” he replied, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

You couldn’t help but smile at how fiercely he wanted to protect you, but a part of you couldn’t shake the feeling that this was more about his insecurities than anything else.

The Social Media Incident

The second time his jealousy flared up was through social media. You had posted a picture on Instagram from a night out with some friends. It was a harmless photo—just you and a couple of friends, including a guy you had known for years. The comments were mostly positive, but one stood out to Lando: the guy friend had commented with a fire emoji and a simple “Looking great!”

Lando saw it before you even had a chance to reply. The next thing you knew, he was in your messages, not angry, but clearly annoyed.

“Who’s that guy?” Lando asked, even though you’d introduced him to your friend several times before.

“Just a friend, Lando. You know him,” you replied, trying to downplay the situation.

“Yeah, but why is he commenting like that on your picture? Doesn’t he know you’re taken?” Lando’s jealousy was evident in his words, though he tried to mask it with a casual tone.

You sighed, feeling a mix of frustration and amusement. “Lando, it’s just a compliment. It doesn’t mean anything.”

“Still, I don’t like it,” he admitted. “I just don’t want anyone getting the wrong idea.”

You reassured him that he had nothing to worry about, but the possessiveness in his voice lingered in your mind.

The Party Dilemma

One evening, you and Lando attended a party hosted by one of his friends. The night was going well until you started chatting with one of the other guests, a charming guy who was also a big F1 fan. He was asking you about what it was like to date Lando, clearly starstruck by the fact that you were with one of his idols.

Lando, who had been across the room, noticed you talking to the guy. You saw him making his way through the crowd, his eyes locked on you. By the time he reached you, he had that familiar tight-lipped smile on his face.

“Hey, everything okay over here?” Lando asked, though it was more of a rhetorical question.

The guy, oblivious to Lando’s mood, nodded enthusiastically. “Yeah, man, just asking your girlfriend what it’s like to be with an F1 driver. Must be a crazy life.”

Lando slipped an arm around your waist, pulling you close. “It is, but she handles it like a pro,” he said, but there was a possessive edge to his tone.

The conversation quickly fizzled out, and once the guy left, Lando turned to you, his expression softening.

“Sorry if I came on too strong,” he murmured, his fingers brushing your cheek. “I just hate seeing other guys all over you.”

“They weren’t all over me, Lando,” you gently corrected him, but he just shook his head, pulling you closer.

“To me, it feels like they are,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your temple.

The Photographer Incident

During one of Lando’s races, you were approached by a photographer who asked if he could take some candid shots of you for a feature about F1 drivers’ partners. You agreed, thinking it would be fun and not really a big deal.

The photographer was friendly, making you laugh as he snapped photos. But Lando, who had just finished a debrief, noticed from a distance. The moment he saw the two of you together, he made a beeline for you, his expression unreadable.

“Mind if I join in?” Lando asked, his tone light but his eyes serious as he slid an arm around your waist, pulling you into his side. The photographer, sensing the tension, quickly wrapped up the session.

As soon as the photographer left, Lando turned to you, his eyes searching yours. “I didn’t like how close he was getting,” he admitted.

“He was just doing his job,” you replied, though you couldn’t help but notice how tightly Lando was holding you.

“Maybe. But I don’t like sharing you,” he said with a small, possessive smile.

You chuckled, trying to brush it off, but the intensity of his words lingered in your mind long after.

The Touchy Subject

The final straw came during a dinner with some friends. One of them, a guy you’d known since childhood, was particularly affectionate—nothing out of the ordinary for someone you’d grown up with. He would playfully nudge you, drape an arm around your shoulder, and joke around like you were siblings.

Lando, however, didn’t see it that way.

Throughout the dinner, you noticed Lando’s grip tightening on his utensils every time your friend got a little too close. His jaw was clenched, and his eyes were locked onto the two of you with an intensity that made you uncomfortable.

At one point, when your friend made a joke and lightly squeezed your shoulder, Lando abruptly stood up, startling everyone at the table.

“I need some air,” he muttered, not even looking at you as he walked out of the restaurant.

You excused yourself and followed him outside, finding him pacing near the entrance. He looked up when he saw you, his expression a mix of anger and frustration.

“Lando, what’s going on?” you asked, genuinely concerned.

“I can’t stand it,” he confessed, running a hand through his hair. “The way he touches you, like he has any right to… It drives me crazy.”

“He’s just a friend, Lando,” you said softly, stepping closer to him. “He’s always been like that. There’s nothing between us.”

“But there could be,” Lando snapped, then immediately regretted his words. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I just… I hate the thought of losing you to someone else.”

You reached out, cupping his face in your hands. “You’re not going to lose me, Lando. But you need to trust me, trust us.”

He sighed, leaning into your touch. “I do trust you. It’s just… I love you so much, and sometimes it scares me. I don’t want anyone else to have what we have.”

His confession was heartfelt, but it also made you realize just how deep his insecurities ran. You loved Lando, and you knew he loved you just as fiercely. But his jealousy was becoming more than just a quirk—it was starting to overshadow the good moments, making you question where the line between love and possessiveness should be drawn.

As you stood there, holding him close, you couldn’t help but wonder how much longer you could handle the sweet turning sour.

[highdefhoetry]

double teamed.

cw: nsfw!! mmf threesome, jealousy/competitiveness, blowjob & swallowing, fingering, squirting, licking/tasting cum, praise, penetration (penis-in-vagina), big dicks, female reader. this is meant to be softer/fluffier with a friendly rivalry.

plot: your best friends gojo and geto have always been jokesters. but one day, one of their jokes goes a little too far.

“Hey, (Y/N). Which one of us is cuter? Me, or Suguru?”

Satoru asks you this seemingly innocent question while the three of you are at your place hanging out. You all had decided to curl up on your long sofa and spend the day watching stupid cartoons and music videos, but Satoru had gotten bored and decided he was going to stir the pot. As usual. Suguru, who’s sitting to your right, looks at you expectantly with a small half-smile, as if he already knows your answer.

You snicker quietly. “Neither. Both of you are butt ugly.”

Suguru slaps a hand on the back of your neck and squeezes tightly. You squirm in his grasp, giggling as you try to push him off.

“Brat.”

“I was just kidding!!”

Gojo, to your left, turns towards you and takes off his sunglasses, then sets them on the coffee table. He gazes at you with his big, beautiful blue eyes, smirking ever so slightly.

“Come on. We all know you’re hopelessly in love with me.”

You laugh again. “Yeah, right. Keep dreaming.”

“Yeah, ‘Toru,” Suguru drapes his arm around your shoulders, pulls you into his chest. “You’re not her type.”

“And you are?”

Suguru grins. “I sure am.”

“Ha-ha.”

You feel your face flush as the two playfully fight over you. It was a common occurrence, one of the bits you liked to do together. It was part of your weird friendship with the two strongest sorcerers in Japan. It was all in good fun, and you liked the attention.

Something felt different this time, though. Suguru was holding you a little too tightly, Satoru was inching up a little too close. 

“Which one of us do you think would be a better kisser?” Your white-haired friend asks you, licking his lips.

“Um…” the next question catches you off guard. Your eyes dart up at Suguru, who smirks back at you, then to Satoru, who is waiting patiently for your answer. The question he’d asked earlier was mostly made in jest, but this time the sorcerer sounds serious. Your heart flutters, and you start to feel more and more nervous.

“...I dunno, jeez. Why are you asking that all of sudden?”

“‘Cause I wanna know.”

Satoru is so close now that you feel sandwiched between the two giants. Suguru, still with his arm wrapped around you. And Satoru, who just placed his hand on your thigh and is now caressing iit softly. Your skin quivers from the feather-light sensation.

“I wanna know, too,” Suguru pipes in, strokes your hair and neck with his fingers. You shudder and let out a small gasp. 

What the hell was going on?

“I… think both of you would be good kissers.”

“Ah, ah, ah,” Satoru scolds. “Only one of us can be the best. You have to choose.”

“Well, how am I supposed to know? I’ve never kissed either of you.”

“Hmm…” Suguru puts a hand on his chin, strokes his thumb across it while pretending to be deep in thought. “She’s right. How could she possibly know if neither of us have kissed her?”

“Good point, my friend,” Satoru grins mischievously. “ I s’pose there’s only one way to remedy that.”

As the two of them stare you down, you feel your heart pound madly against your chest.

A split second passes, and Satoru suddenly cups both of your cheeks, pulls your face forward, and presses his lips against yours. You let out a startled “Mmph!” and melt into the kiss. His lips are soft like silk, and you can hear him quietly moan when his tongue seeks out yours. You feel his hands trail down your neck and shiver at the touch.

It’s over too soon. When Satoru pulls away and flashes that accomplished smile of his, Suguru is overcome with a fit of jealousy. He gently yet firmly takes your chin and pulls your face towards him, then plants a delicate kiss on your lips. His lips aren’t as soft, but his kiss feels deeper. The two of you get lost in each other, your hand goes to the back of his neck and pulls him closer.

You look back over at Satoru and see that his cocky expression has faded to one of envy. Suguru places his hands on your thighs, rubs his smooth palms over them a bit more desperately. 

“Well?” Satoru scoffs. 

Your face is on fire, and your body feels weak. With them both touching and exploring your sensitive skin, you find yourself feeling more and more overwhelmed as things continue. Their big hands are skilled in touch; one of Satoru’s hands cups your breast, covering it completely as he fondles and gropes you. Suguru grips your thigh with one hand and has the other on your opposite hip, squeezing both gently until you make high-pitched noises. 

“...I can’t choose,” you answer honestly, despite the sudden shyness that has overcome you. “You’re both amazing.”

“Hmm…” says Satoru.

“Hmmm…” says Suguru.

“Did you hear that, Suguru? She says she can’t choose.”

“I guess that means she’ll have to take us both.”

Before you can say anything else, they suddenly push you backwards, pinning you down as they each straddle one side of your hips. They hold down your wrists and use their free hands to feel you up, starting from your upper thighs. You can’t move a muscle as they trail their fingertips up your body, sneaking under the hem of your shirt to reach bare skin. Your breaths become light and airy, caught between moans and light giggles. 

“You like this, baby?” Suguru comments as he tweaks your nipple, grinning when you arch your back. 

“Look how wet she is already,” Satoru slides his down between your legs, feels your soaked panties through your cotton shorts. “This is what you wanted all along, isn’t it?”

“Mmm… aaaahhhh!”

Your mind has gone fuzzy. You can barely get out words, let alone complete sentences. Having both of your best friends gang up on you like this, taking turns touching all over your body, is overwhelming to say the least. But that doesn’t mean its unwelcome.

Satoru pulls down your panties, massages the hood of your clit for a few seconds while he slides his fingers into your hole. One at first, then two, steadily pumping in and out in a rhythmic flow as his thumb circles the hood once more. His smile is feral and deranged as he watches your eyes roll in the back of your head.

Suguru lets go of your wrist and focuses on your breasts, leaning down to lick your nipples while occasionally peppering kisses all over your chest. He strokes the spot under your boobs and lets out a chuckle when you squeal, proud of himself for finding yet another errogenous zone. The two sensations together bring you to the edge quickly, and Satoru pushes you over with a single curl of his index finger. You cry out, filled with pure ecstasy, and come hard on his hands until your legs are shaking. The sorcerer licks his fingers as he admires the view of your disheveled hair and your sweat-plastered face.

“God, you taste good…”

Tired of waiting for his turn, Suguru takes the lead. After yanking his pants and boxers down, he takes his erection in hand and rubs it slowly. It’s massive, at least 9 or 10 inches, and it’s perfectly thick. He lifts up your hips and carefully presses the tip against your hole. It’s barely in, but you still let out a yelp. He slides it inside you, stretching you out, coaxing out your loud moans and sounds of pleasure. Then, he starts pumping, slowly at first so as not to hurt you, speeding up once he senses you’re slick enough to take it.

Satoru, embittered that he’d missed his chance to penetrate you, decides to get his another way. He, too, yanks off his pants and underwear, tossing them aside with little care. His dick is just as beautiful as Suguru’s: it’s long, thick, and slightly curved, although pale from lack of sun. You can’t tell from where you’re laying, but it looks to be as big as Suguru’s, if not slightly larger. He kneels at your head, holds his member in hand and waits for your lips to take it. You part them slightly and dance your tongue around his shaft, doing your best to suck him while Suguru fucks you deeply. You feel yourself start to choke, but he senses that, pulling out a bit so you can breathe. Then, when you’re ready again, your grab his cock and wrap your lips around it once more.

The two men groan in perfect harmony, moaning in unison in gravelly baritones and heavenly falsettos. Satoru sounds like an angel; the lovely noises falling from his lips almost match the beauty of his face. Suguru grunts in pleasure, mumbling praise and affection into your ear as he thrusts inside you.

“Hngh… fuck, you feel amazing…”

“Oh God, Toru… S-Suguru… aaaah!”

“(Y/N)... I’m gonna come…”

Suguru finishes first, letting loose a giant load that fills you with warmth. You feel his dick twitch and throb inside your walls, and clench them purposely to hear him moan once more. Satoru takes a bit longer to finish, warning you when he’s about to blow. You take his load and swallow it whole, relishing the sweet taste of his cum. Exhausted, both men collapse at either side of you, panting heavily as they enjoy the last few fleeting waves of their orgasms.

“I think… it’s safe to say…” Satoru manages to spit out as he curls a leg around yours. “(Y/N) definitely likes me more.”

“No… way…” Suguru argues back weakly, then wraps an arm around your waist. “She’s totally into me.”

“Oh yeah? Well, she swallowed my load.”

“So what? She let me bust inside her.”

Their bickering starts anew, and all you can do is sigh. You try to hide your growing smile as they snuggle up closer, as if claiming parts of you for themselves. Some things will be different after today, but one will remain the same.

You were madly, madly in love with them both. And you always would be.

[salaciousdoll]

✩˚｡⋆ ⋆ ⋆ Reflection and invisibility ⋆ ⋆ ⋆ ˚｡✩

･˳ . ⋆ Featuring Risotto Nero x La squadra!Fem!reader ･˳ . ⋆

୨⍣୧ ⁺⁎˚ ⋆━━ Be advised to the warnings of Risotto and Reader both being Assassins in Passione, Boss!Giorno, Au where everyone is alive and thriving, smut, hardcore fucking, katoptronophilia( fucking in front of mirror), body worship, reader is a stand user but it’s not used( none of their stands are except illuso, voyeurism, dirty talking, degradtion kink up 1000 in here, there’s praise here and there, dick drunk reader and pussy drunk Risotto, backshots, reader has a voice kink, Risotto cracks subliminal jokes here and there( he’s a little jokester when he was fighting doppio in the anime), pet names in Italian( I really tried here but pet names such as bunny, slut, beautiful, doll, Angel, etc.), your ex is Bruno, Risotto has dick piercings( frenum ladder), Risotto makes you count the amount of thrust he gives you, edging, and mention of somnophillia at the end. Oh and Dark content. Wc: 2.7k

Minors do not interact, 18+ Only!

ෆ ‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿ ෆ ̟ ̇ ┈•ﾟNote from Salaciousdoll: This is my first time writing for JJBA as a whole and my first time writing for Risotto as well… I really hope you all enjoy this fic even if you don’t watch jjba, hope I can convince you babies to watch it with this fic. If you know Italian please tell me if the words are wrong. ‘Grazii assai mia bellissima, bambola’= Thank you very much, my beautiful doll, ‘Angelo’ = Angel, ‘ coniglio’ = bunny, ‘Bambola’= doll, ‘sudicio’ = dirty , ‘troia’= slut

Salaciousber Masterlist

Risotto Nero was a man everyone either heard of or came into contact with. Both encounters could build up the emotion of fear and the feeling of danger, nothing else. The man could kill without a blink of an eye or a movement of cringe. To everyone else, he was a man who they feared just by either his tall stature or his black sclera eyes combining with the red pupils to compliment them.

Risotto was the scary man , your parents warned you about when you were younger, yet when they always told them stories, you never believed them. You had to see the boogeyman yourself in order to actually be scared. Those thoughts lead to your failures and success in the underground world. The failures of almost meeting your end and the success of getting to see Risotto— being able to keep him between your white manicured fingers. Risotto grew to be obsessed with you just because of your beauty and perspective of him. You didn’t judge him by one look of his eyes, not that he cares what other people think. He only cares when he thinks of the person as a colleague or more. You were more. His love, he adored since you came to his team after transferring from Bruno’s gang.

Bruno Buccirati was your first love but wasn’t your last. Risotto may be the last man you fall in love with, especially since you’ve been in a relationship with him for three years now . At first, you didnt talk with one another outside of missions and the missions he assigned. He wasn’t the one for small talk and you weren’t either, the lingering ghost of love you had for Bruno was in the air everywhere you walked and every mission you did. You couldn’t get him off your mind and the rest of La squadra were fed up with your closed off personality, so they complained to Risotto about you. In response to their concerns over the total of two months you were there, he had no choice but to make the first move.

It wasn’t easy for the both of you to talk to one another since he made it clear that you needed to get your shit together and perform your best on missions, otherwise he might as well start planning a funeral for you now. “ Do you want to die?”

You stared at him with wide eyes because that was the first thing coming out of his mouth after calling you in. You shook your head and looked away. He stared at you even more and under his dangerous but alluring eyes, you couldn’t help but to get a little aroused and nervous. A bad combination of feels to have, especially in front of your boss..

“ No, boss.”, You say to the wall and he didn’t like that one bit.

Risotto's deep voice said your name with malice in his tone, “ I didn’t know I was a wall.” You wanted to laugh because you didn’t think he had humor, yet he proved you wrong so maybe you’ll open up a bit more. When you didn’t look at him at all, he took it as disrespect. “ Look at me when I talk to you. You’re supposed to respect your superiors, did Bucciarati not teach you that. Maybe the perception of Bucciarati being painted as a noble man was another lie he shown everyone because no noble man would allow their colleagues to disrespect an su-”

“ Excuse me, Capo… I would rather not talk about Bruno right now. And I’m just nervous, so forgive me for disrespecting you. It’s not my intention to do this unforbidden action.”, You say to Risotto, who raised a pale blue eyebrow at you. You didn’t want to hear Risotto talking about Bruno like he doubted his existence or portrayal of his existence to the people who adored him— you being one of the people who adored him. The more Risotto stared at you, the more he could see that you were obedient and respectful after all. You two stared at each other a bit longer than usual taking in each other's features. You noticed his beautiful and unique eyes, his full lips, the creases under his eyes from the lack of sleep probably or just a result of getting older, his nose, a nose you see yourself riding any moment if you continued staring. He noticed the shape of your eyes, how your nose looked, eyebrows, big cheeks, and finally your lips. Your plush lips with the perfect shape to them. He loved how thick and full they were— always shiny with lipgloss he sees you apply every 2 minutes also. He wanted to bite them but that’ll have to wait now.

He cleared his throat, “ I asked that question because it seems your head is in another place on missions with your squad members, some of them voice their concerns and I’m here to let you know that you can’t slack off into dreamland unless you want to die. Your stand is powerful and you are powerful, so I need you to start showing me that you're powerful and useful as they say. Don’t let it happen again, understand?”

You nodded your head and he huffed before speaking, “ You’re dismissed and { reader’s last name}, you’re going on a mission with formaggio to shake up Riccolo— Boss orders. So get prepared to leave with him in 15.” You nodded your head and left the office.

You used to hate that Giorno moved you to the team you decided to save just because you knew formaggio from a one night stand. That night was fun especially since you just moved from your home country to Italy with your sister two weeks before. You were a foreigner and it was visible yet Formaggio didn’t care unlike half of Italy would. Bare minimum really but that’s not the reason you fucked the man. He charmed his way into your panties and you had him wrapped around your finger even before you gave him some, basically the first time he saw you He was a good fuck, but not as great as Bruno or your Capo now.

Now, though, you were on top of the moon from moving teams, even after four years, because you were too busy getting bent over in front of the mirror by your Capo. His rough hands were squeezing your stomach making some of your tummy melt in between his long, thick fingers, “ Give me one more, bambola. One more for me.”

You couldn’t hold on for dear life. Your left boob was massaged softly as he pounded into you from behind. The feeling of his red eyes was enough to make anyone fold and you were long gone. You folded as soon as he kissed your neck while you were standing in front of the mirror with your new bra and pantie set you got from your favorite lingerie store. “ I— I can’t, Ris’ pleaseuhhh.”

Your moans mixed with your cries of pleasure as he rolled his fat and long cock inside of you. His frenum ladder piercings were adding on to your pleasure because of the cold metals grinding against the walls of your dripping pussy. You felt every vein of his cock as he fucked into you like he’s never gonna see you again. He couldn’t help bending you over to pound inside of your sweet fat cunt because of how amazing you looked in that set. He loved worshiping and showing appreciation for you and your body. Your body was his favorite piece of art— he could stare at it for hours. Your a live painting that he could worship and fuck anytime he wanted.

“ Fuck, coniglio, you’re pussy is taking me so well. My perfect girl. Gonna squirt for me.”, Risotto grunt out his response as his hips snapped into your plump ass creating ripples, which was his favorite thing to watch. He loved watching any part of your body shake or jump. Fuck, you are his heaven. The heaven he will never get to see since his hands were tainted with hundreds of people’s blood.

The wetness of your pussy and the slaps of hips meeting was heard so loud in the room as your eyes rolled back into your head, “ You’re tearing me apart, Ris’ please slow down~” he loved how you stretched the word down out. It shows how brain dumb you are right now for him. Brain was filled with nothing, becoming nothing but mushiness. Just the way he liked you.

“ Slow down you say?” Risotto slowed his hips down and watched your expression in the mirror prior to turning himself invisible. “ Want you to look at yourself being stretched and fucked dumb on my cock in any pace. Whether it’s fast or slow, you still couldn’t, guhahh— you naughty little slut; You dare squeeze me that tight after I told you to loosen up for me.”

Risotto dropped his hands from holding you and bunched up the hairstyle you had in your hair before long stroking your pussy— deep and slow. He let out a wicked chuckle, “ Look at you… shaking all because of my cock, right my little angelo. Look closely in the mirror for me and then I want you to, shit! Your pussy is trapping me inside.” He couldn’t focus on what he was trying to say. Risotto was only this vocal with you. His deep voice was everything you needed to hear in your ear. Voice was sending a strike of thunder inside the blood in your body, allowing you to become even more turned on. His voice alone could get you off, so this act being an add on is what your dreams are made for. You brought his dirty talking and surge of pleasure out of him, none of his past hookups got an inch of words from him. Only moans and that’s if they pulled it out of him.

Risotto slapped your ass causing you to move forward into the mirror. Your fingerprints were imprinted in the big 48’ tall and 83’ wide mirror in your room. You were so glad you brought this mirror. You can use it for this exact reason. Risotto yanked your head back enough for you to see you and his invisibility in the mirror. It was like you were getting fucked by a ghost, spooky and freaky. Such a wonderful feeling.

“ Pay attention to the mirror, tesoro. Now choose a number, any number.”, his groans were heard right after he finished his sentence. You moaned when you saw his eyes staring at you through the mirror. You couldn’t even form words because of how slow and dragged his cock was going inside of your sobbing pussy.

Your fingers bunched up on the mirror and you knew you were close to squirting on this mirror. As his cock dragged in and out of you, you tried to form an answer to his questions. Nothing but moans and fumbling words in between were heard. You were really fucked out and he wanted to cherish the sounds forever.

Risotto continued fucking you with groans in your ear prior to biting your ear lob causing you to scream, “ Do you want me to ask the rest of your teammates? They’re watching, you know. Watching how you come apart on my cock, watching how your tits bounce back and forth as I fuck you like the sudicio little troia you are.” Your eyes widen at that information and his words. You finally took a deep look into the mirror and there stood every last member of La Squadra staring or smirking at you through the mirror, damn you illuso and your fucking stand. You shouldn’t have gotten turned on at being watched, but you couldn’t help it.

Risotto felt your pussy grab his cock like she never wanted to let him go. He hissed when he felt you squeezed tighter, stopping his movements all together. You whined and looked back at him to see his eyes looking at you with lust and anger. “ Number.” You tired to fuck back into him, but his finger nails dug into your hips causing you to bite your lip letting out a short muffled scream.

Your lips quivered as you answered him, “ 10! Ris’ please fuck me. I need to cum.” Risotto smirked at you, yet you couldn’t see it due to his invisibility. You only saw his eyes, which was more than enough for you. Risotto then dragged your back to leave a little space before the mirror.

He bent you over to a 90 degree angle and gripped your wide hips with his big hands, “ Count every thrust I give to your sweet pussy, 10 counts for two rounds. Two rounds because how much I’ve had to repeat myself with you.” Tears started to pour out of your pretty eyes as he grabbed your hair in his hands and snapped his hips forward causing a huge ripple on your ass.

“ Fuckkk! One.”, Your moan was so loud that you didn’t even care if someone delivering your packages for today heard you as you heard the house doorbell ring or was that ringing in your head from how hard he thrusted inside of you.

Risotto pulled out of you leaving the tip in, snapping his hips inside of you again, “ What’s the number? I seem to forgot already, bellissima. Help me remember.” You hated how he teased you as he rolled his hips around, mixing your juices inside of your pussy in the process. His piercings was a foreign feeling inside of you, no matter how many times you two fucked or made love, the metals felt so good inside of your pussy and you will always tell him that whenever you want sex or just wanted to compliment him to catch him off guard.

Risotto repeated this technique for two times in a row with the count of ten each time so it was twenty in total. He made you squirt on the first round at the number 5. He did nothing but chuckle at your pathetic display of shaking, “ So pathetic, can’t take this but was surely running your mouth the other day about how you can take me. You know what you are right now.”

He grabbed you up by your hair— your sweaty back was to his sweaty abs as his arms were now wrapped around your tummy. He whispered in your ear as his team looked on from a distance inside of the mirror at your pathetic attempt of holding on, “ A rookie. You know how much fun I like to poke at rookies.” He threw his head back at the feeling of your pussy and you wished you could see his facial expressions, “ Brace yourself.”

Risotto gripped your body like a mad man and fucked you like a caveman. Pussy was squirting non stop as he slammed into you over and over until he came inside of you with a loud groan.

“ Aughhh, good fucking girl. So good. Shit!l have to get you pregnant. Have our children run around our new house I buy for us, away on the, hahh!, countryside, away from everyone. Just you and me.” , He moaned as he snapped his hips inside of you three more times. His warm cum fills you up so gloriously. You couldn’t do anything but lay limp in his arms— still standing up with him. Your body did shake in his arms so I guess that was doing something. Risotto smirked and turned himself back to his visible self, kissing your head prior to looking at his teammates with his famous death glare. Basically telling them to fuck off and leave him and his lady alone. They obeyed his silent order all due to Prosciutto understanding what Risotto is saying.

“ Grazii assai mia bellissima, bambola”, Risotto whispers to your passed out figure in his arms. His dick always made you pass out from the length, piercings, and girth. He massaged your stomach as he walked to you to bed, carefully laying you down and going to get a towel to clean you off, can’t have you sticking in stickiness and wetness, otherwise he’ll fuck you in your sleep. You already granted him permission to perform somnophilia a few days ago too. Maybe he’ll try it out later.

ෆ ̟ ̇ ┈•ﾟTagging: @chosoist @honeybleed @simpingfor-wakasa @happygoluckyalexis @mastermindenoshimaalicia @angelshub @bxrbie1 @sylisan @lilvampirina @deftrow @uzxotic @tayler17-84

ﾟ•┈© all right reserved to salaciousdoll, she does not give permission to steal, plagiarize, and translate.

[koolaidoverwriting]

Hii! Could I request some general dating head canons for Toby?

GENERAL DATING HEADCANONS

CHARACTERS: Ticci Toby, Gender Neutral Reader

A little late, sorry! I did include the waffles joke. I will never exclude the waffles joke.

CW: It's All Fluff, He's Socially Awkward and Cute, Mentions of Childhood Abuse

TICCI TOBY

Toby was born into a life of violence; he's been exposed to it, been a victim of it, and he's committed it himself. You, along with his colleagues, are an escape from the raw and harrowing reality of his life. You are the person he holds at night, whispering to you how you make him better — how you two complete each other.

He vows to never treat you like his father treated his mother. He wants to keep you happy and satisfied, doing everything he can to provide you support But, he's insecure about the relationship and will often ask you for reassurance.

He's overly affectionate. Toby will want to spend a lot of time with you. You go on a date at least once a week — even if it's something small like watching a movie together in the living room. He's also real touchy, holding your hand whenever he can, caressing your skin just to feel your warmth, and giving you small kisses over your body that make you all bubbly.

There's gonna be some biting involved between you two. Playful little nips on your collar. Toby sees biting as a form of love, but he'll stop if you ask him to. He just likes hearing your flustered laughs.

Sharing clothes is a huge yes. Toby thinks you look adorable wearing his t–shirt or hoodie. In the winter time, he'll be sure to pass you his coat — even if you're already wearing one; he wants you to be warm! "My goggles look so funny on you!" he jokes all the time.

If you make him waffles for breakfast (or for any meal, really), he'll be overjoyed. He has his own waffle–maker collection and will absolutely look at waffle–makers on Amazon with you.

Toby got hurt a lot. He couldn't feel the pain, so he often joked about it. Now that he's with you, and he's seen how worried you get, he's started to take care of himself more. Toby's new–found self preservation is shocking to the other proxies, but to you it's sweet.

Toby likes playing with fire. Hell, he'd have the greatest time committing arson with you if it wouldn't endanger your life. On cozy nights, you may go to the backyard, start a bonfire and burn random stuff. He claims the stuff was found in the cellar; but you've definitely seen these items in Jeff's bedroom... Maybe that's why they have such a rivalry.

Toby's gallery has an album dedicated to you. Pictures of you he's taken; the selfies you've sent to him; pictures of you two. Toby loves it all! He's the type to spam your messages with compliments after you send a picture of yourself.

!!! toby having a waffle–maker collection is such a funny idea to me and only me i am so sorry guys. i love him though. fun guy. i definitely think he's a jokester type too. always cracking puns and joking about him getting hurt when it's not funny at all... then apologising when he sees your concern.

[sweetestcaptainhughes]

What are you trying to say? - Trevor Zegras

Word Count - 3600

Author's Note - I 100 percent projected my own dysleixia hardcore into this. This was 100 percent written for the dyslexic girlies and learning disability girlies only. Also not me accidentally maybe becoming a Trevor girlie after writing this oh no. This one is by far my favorite segment.

Warnings - light angst but like it ends happy shocking for this page, who am I becoming???

Summary - In the talking stage with Trevor Zegras you're not sure how his joking personality will respond to your struggles that you have with being an adult with dyslexia, especially since it doesn't affect you how media expects it to.

Let me love you masterlist main masterlist

This isn’t something new to you, you’ve struggled your entire life with the fact that you're dyslexic. It’s a lot more complicated than people may recognize. Many people assume that it only comes up when you're trying to read something like a textbook or an article, and that when you’re finished with school it won’t really affect your daily life anymore but that’s far from the truth. In truth, being an adult with dyslexia affects you in little ways daily. From having difficulty knowing your left and right when given verbal directions, your spelling being terrible when texting others, mispronouncing certain words and being easily embarrassed when it gets pointed out, or worse sometimes the word is literally on the tip of your tongue you can even physically see in your brain but your mouth can’t form the proper sounds, how certain fonts you struggle to read vs others, or that black ink on white paper is the bane of your existence.  Although all of these are “little” things, it does impact the way you communicate with others. It does feel extremely frustrating sometimes feeling like people think that you're using your dyslexia as an “excuse” when in reality your brain is wired completely differently because of it. 

Since you first met Trevor and started talking to him, you had that fear you always do in the pit of your stomach, will he pick on you the first time that he truly can’t understand a text or the first time he hears you mispronounce a word despite years of speech therapy where you tried to but still you can’t pronounce correctly. Although, part of you knew that your fear was extremely irrational, part of you couldn’t shake the feeling that was until proven otherwise the jokester in Trevor would make a joke about something you truly couldn’t control. 

That is until today, when it happened it’s one of those rare days when you were driving and Trevor was in the passenger seat. His car was in the shop, and he needed a ride back from the arena to his apartment. Originally he was going to take an Uber but since you both already had plans after the morning skate you insisted on picking him up. 

“It’s easiest if you take this right up here to get back to my place.” He directs you without looking up from his phone,you tell him okay, turn on your left turn signal and get in the left lane. Trevor finally looks up from his phone while you're waiting at the red light for it to turn green to see you're in the wrong lane. 

“Sweetie?” asking in a questioning tone

“Hmmm” 

“This is the left lane. I told you to take a right.” Trevor says in a concerning tone as to how you were five traffic lanes away from where you needed to be. 

“sorry I thought you said ‘left’. I can make a u-turn?” Deciding in the moment you didn’t want to admit that you heard him correctly but processed the direction wrong, you offered as the traffic light finally turned green. 

“It’s alright we can just take the long way. Don’t worry about a u-turn.”  Not seeming to care at all that it will add an extra 10 minutes to the drive due to the mistake. 

As you continued driving you ended up making another wrong turn, Trevor put his left hand on your thigh and subconsiously rubbed small circles into skin to comfort your growing anxiety, he could feel this odd tension that was built up in the car. “Can you point please?” your voice barely over a whisper as you felt extremely embarrassed all of a sudden and started feeling overwhelmed all of a sudden. 

“Yeah Y/N/N I can do that, we could also switch places. I can drive you the rest of the way if you need it if you're feeling anxious all of a sudden.” Trevor was being really sweet, trying to fix the problem at hand thinking it was just some anxious thoughts and not your brain processing audible information incorrectly. 

“No, pointing is good.” Forcing yourself to look straight ahead because you don’t want to accidentally catch his eyes as he looks at you with a worried look. He squeezes your thigh in a comforting way and drops the topic. The rest of the ride felt quick as he pointed and said the direction you needed to go until you reached his apartment. Finding a parking spot in the garage you parked your car, as soon as you felt your foot on the brake, and your right hand pulled the gear in park, you leaned back automatically and sighed grateful you were done driving. Trevor still had his hand on your thigh, he turned his neck so that his head was also resting on the headrest. 

Trevor patiently waited until you opened your eyes, turning to him with a soft smile. “You ready?” you ask him, as you start to unbuckle your seatbelt. As you grab your purse from the back, your hand on the door handle. His hand that was on your thigh is gone and immediately pulls you by the wrist back into your seat. As he takes his other hand and gently places it on your cheek forcing you to look at him. 

“Can we talk about it?” His voice was steady, calm, confident but soft, almost as if he was scared of your reaction. 

Smiling a little wider now, in a split second you try to decide what you want to do. Do you want to tell a boy who you’ve only been casually talking to and hanging out with a handful of times - one of them being this current moment - about being dyslexic. Although it’s not that big of a deal in retrospect, it’s something that you can never take back once you said the words. Even though it’s something so simple and common no one ever looks at you the same again. Were you ready to tell Trevor, and see his face change permanently or did you want to live in ignorant bliss for a little longer. 

“I’m fine, it’s just when I drive somewhere new I like listening to the GPS and not a person telling me directions, it helps me focus better is all.” sheepishly you admit. 

Ignorant Bliss. That’s the choice you made. 

“Okay well next time, can you tell me that so I don’t have to watch you stress yourself out please?” His hand that was on your wrist, going down to your hand playing with your hand. Taking your hand that he was playing with, fully grasping his you squeeze his hand as a silent yes, and nod your head. He leans over the middle console and quickly peaks your lips as if it was a last minute impulse and he meant the cheek. “Thank you, let's go inside.” 

—-------------------------------

Living in ignorant bliss was great for a few weeks, until you started to actually like Trevor. Talking to a guy for a few months and it not going anywhere vs meeting someone and potentially seeing at least an exclusive relationship with them were two very different things. Knowing that you saw a relationship with him in the future meant it was only a matter of time before he found out that your dyslexic which again isn’t that big of a deal, but the fact that you also lied to him a few weeks ago. Not telling him is one thing, but lying when he asked why you were struggling to drive that day is a completely different act. 

Trying to put off the inevitable you tried to push the thought to the back of your mind. Somehow convincing yourself that if you didn’t think about it, then the problem would disappear he would never find out. I mean when you didn’t know how to spell a word while texting, you just spoke it into your phone. As far as grammar no one really had perfect grammar when texting including Trevor to be perfectly honest he probably didn’t even notice half the time. Plenty of people kept all their devices in dark mode for plenty of reasons, he had no reason to ask, although you did it because it helped your eyes stay focused on the words in front of you, not for the aesthetic. 

Even so, with all of these excuses as to why he wouldn’t notice you failed to remember that certain words you truly can’t pronounce the correct way no matter how hard you try. It all came crashing down tonight when you were at Trevor’s apartment cooking dinner for the both of you. Dinner was almost done at this point, when Trevor came behind you just now re-entering the kitchen after taking an expected call from his little sister. Trevor wrapped his arms around your waist, his head resting on top of your shoulder. 

“Everything okay?” you ask your curiosity getting the best of you, even though you know it’s none of your business. 

“Yeah she’s fine.” Pressing a kiss into where your jawline and neck meet. “smells good.” He compliments your cooking as he teases you one more time with a small nip with his teeth where he just kissed you, before pulling away and resting his head on your shoulder. 

Answering shyly, you let out a “thank you.”

“Anything I can help with?” asking genuinely although you're not sure if it’s to be kind or if it’s because he’s hungry but either way you’ll take it. As he slowly unwraps himself from you, getting ready to help you in any way you need. 

Without looking up from the chicken that you're grilling on the stove, trying to concentrate on the task at hand you answer him. “Yeah actually can you grab out the mellk from the fridge for the mashed potatoes.” Not even thinking twice about what you just said until you heard a chuckle coming from across the kitchen. 

“What babe?” standing in front of a now open fridge, he could have sworn you tried to say milk but botched the word so badly, it couldn’t have possibly been.

“the mellk” finally noticing what you asked for, knowing this is one of the words people can’t help but point out how you butcher it. 

“What are you trying to say?” he asked, truly confused now that he heard it twice. 

“M - il - k “ you repeat slowing down your mouth trying to force yourself to pronounce it properly but also not speak too slowly. Hoping that it's noticeable as you force your tongue to the roof of your mouth to make the “il” sound.  

A small chuckle leaves Trevor’s lips but it wasn’t a malicious way, it was as if he chuckled because he found it adorable. “Here's the milk baby.” walking back over to you and placing it on the empty counter space next to the bowl of steaming hot cooked potatoes. Taking the chicken off the hot burner you moved to the island to where the potatoes were. 

“Sorry” you mumble as he stands beside you, his hip resting on the side of the island. 

“For what?” His eyebrows frowned, his eyes focused the side of your face the only thing he could see. Focusing on the task at hand, you used the potato masher and mashed the potatoes. Opening the milk and adding a little along with some butter that you set out earlier. 

Feeling the rise of some anxiety in your stomach, hoping that you could procrastinate just a little longer on admitting that you didn’t tell him the whole truth. Deciding if now was the time or if you were gonna dig yourself in a bigger hole by wrapping yourself in a thicker web of tiny white lies. 

Finally turning your head to the side to face him and taking a deep breath. 

For good measure making one more deep breath before you barely utter the words, your nerves getting the better of you. “I lied.” 

Trevor’s face immediately changed from confusion and concern. In an instant it became shocking and almost hurt, that the girl he thought was actually going somewhere a month in, is admitting to lying to him. Not when he told her in the beginning that lying wasn’t something he tolerated after his ex lied to him for months and manipulated him. Not when he just told his little sister not even ten minutes ago on the phone that tonight he was gonna ask you to be his official girlfriend. “What are you talking about?” his voice cracking before he could even get the word out, quickly clearing his throat to cover up his own insecurities about the possible tension that could slowly be felt brewing in his kitchen. 

“Remember a few weeks, when I was driving you to your apartment from the stad-” 

“What the FUCK does that have to do with lying to me? When did you lie to me Y/N” Not only has Trevor never once raised his voice at you in a not joking way, but he’s never cursed at you, and his tone made you close your eyes and flinch at the impact. Immediately, seeing you flinch he sighed his hand going to lightly crease her arm closest to him. “When did you lie?” asking at a much softer tone than moments before. 

“I’m trying to explain.” Trevor could have sworn he felt his chest hurt when he heard you struggling to speak, as if you were trying to get yourself not to cry. “Please let me explain.” 

“Okay” he softly let out, as he squeezed your arm not sure if he was trying to comfort you or himself as he felt the possibility of you slipping through his fingers. 

“A few weeks ago when I drove you home.” finally turning her body fully turning to face him. “I lied, When you asked me what happened. I told you I need the GPS because I get overwhelmed.” Pausing to make sure that Trevor was following along, he nodded along, “I lied, sort of,” your voice picking up in speed with each word you uttered out  “I mean I do get overwhelmed while driving but it’s not because of that it’s not that I” 

“Baby please take a breath you're scaring me” His other arm is going to cup your cheek, even though he was mad before as he heard you fixated on driving him home a few weeks ago. He knew it couldn’t have possibly been any of the terrible ideas that popped into his head, at least Trevor hoped not.

 “I sometimes get my left and right confused.” Looking up trying to gauge his reaction, watching as one of his eyebrows go down, as if to say ‘that’s all.’ 

“Okay. So that was the lie? Everyone gets confused sometimes and makes mistakes baby it’s okay” His famous smile slowly takes over his face. 

“That’s the thing is it isn’t sometimes, it’s kind of a lot when I’m driving when someone is giving me directions without pointing, and there are other things too. I mean they're small but they still affect me almost daily and I just.” 

Deciding to take a breath because if you don’t you will be more likely to trip up your words or stutter. “I’m dyslexic and it’s not really how they describe the movies.” 

His smile dropped a little and you swear it felt as if your heart felt as if it had just dropped a hundred flights down the Empire State building. “Dyslexic. Like you mix up letters when reading?”

“Yeah but it’s more than that.”

“Okay. But why didn’t you tell me when it happened? Why did you say it’s because you get overwhelmed.” 

“Because I do get overwhelmed when I make dumb mistakes like that. Plus, everytime I tell someone they never look at me the same. A lot of times they are shocked, and they also sometimes judge me because how does it not affect me the way the media portrays it? Why do I mispronounce words, why can’t I tell my left and right when someone gives me a direction, why I can’t read maps to save my fucking life but yet if I don’t have my GPS running I’m bound to a wrong turn, why does sometimes my mind decide I either can’t come up with a word at all or I can physically see it but I can’t say it and I can’t spell it because I’m such a bad speller.” 

“Shhh” not trying to cut you off but also trying to get you to breathe. “So you didn’t tell me cause you were scared I would look at you differently? Or judge you when something you can’t control comes out at random times of the day? That’s why you told me to point instead of just saying it because you didn’t wanna tell me in fear?” Not sure his tone is showing remorse for you thinking that at all or hurting that you ever would think of him in that way. 

“Yeah.” you embarrassingly admit.

Trevor spent the rest of the night listening to you and how your brain was different due to your own personal experience with being a dyslexic. The next morning you found him reading an article about the effects of different lighting and how dark mode was the best for dyslexics and certain fonts were better than others. It made you chuckle as you told him you knew and that’s why your phone was permanently in dark mode.  That day, he changed all the settings on his tv’s in his entire apartment for dark mode, even all of his own personal devices. Finding it adorable that he went on a tangent when he found out certain apps don’t support dark mode and how he said it was discriminating. Finding it harder and harder for yourself to hide your soft smile as you watched him continue his rant, your heart swelling at how passionate he sounded. 

“I really like you, you know.” you admitted when he finally stopped complaining about how Mirosoft finally started supporting dark mode it was still ‘white paper’ on black ink so they really missed the whole point. 

“Oh yeah.” as he grabs you, pulling you towards him on the couch, tangling your legs with his. 

“Yup” popping the p for emphasis.

“I really like you too. Actually I was gonna ask you.. Wanna make this official and let me call you mine.” The blush was obvious on your face, immediately turning a light red shade, nodding your head he pulled you into a soft kiss. 

—---------------------------------------------

A few weeks later you were out to dinner with a few close friends and Trevor. Currently trying to tell a story about one of your new coworkers and how you didn’t like him but mid sentence you froze. Trevor had yet to see you freeze because the word you planned to say completely escaped you. Of course this wasn’t new to your friends as they saw the familiar signs, the way in which you paused, your lips pursed in a questioning way, your hand coming up and shaking knowing it was on the tip of your tongue and you just couldn’t think of it or couldn’t pronounce it. 

What your friends weren’t used to was seeing Trevor respond to it. His response to you struggling made all of them share a glance in approval of his small action. He took your shaking hand and slipped it into his own. Immediately your small flustered expression on your face turns to him. Your friends couldn’t hear what you were saying between yourselves if you were even talking at all, but they could see the care in Trevors eyes and how your frustration seemed to melt away.

“Hi” he whispers only for you to hear after a couple seconds pass. 

A smile breaks out on your face. “Hi” 

“What are you trying to say?” repeating the same sentence that he asked you weeks ago when you asked him to get the milk out the fridge. 

“I can’t think of it.” a sigh leaving your lips. 

“Describe it.” His forehead resting on yours as you look into his eyes. 

“You know, like a red flag.” 

“Like in dating? So a slang term?” 

“I think.” Pausing for a few seconds for your brian to catch up. “But I know it’s not called a red flag, but it’s like it, I think, like when someone does something and immediately you're like ew.” 

“An ick?” he softly suggests. Immediately your mouth forms into an o-shape in shock, making his mouth twitch into the slightest smile. Kissing his check quickly and whispering a quick ‘thanks’ and turning back to your friends. 

“Okay so like this new dude thinks he can come in and just boss all me and my other co-workers around. That’s not even the worst part like not only is he lowkey sexist, he literally only wears highwaters, immediate ick…” Trevor sat there half listening to your story with a huge smile on his face, hand on your thigh drawing patterns subconsciously as he sipped on his drink. He loves listening to you talk, how you get lost in telling stories and he’s happy he was able to help you instead of you pushing it to the side like you did all those months ago. 

That’s how it is from that night on, anytime you text him and he can’t understand it, or you can’t think of a word, or butcher the pronunciation; he will simply turn to you and ask “What are you trying to say?” 

[blacklunardice]

Request: I really loved the artist darling headcannons for Wade Wilson. Could you maybe do headcannons for Wade were he kidnaps his s/o and they constantly try to escape and tell him they hate him when he asks why? Like would he punish them or something and how?

✦Constantly Escaping✦

Warning(s): Post Kidnapping, Mentions of Punishment

Escaping Wade is 50/50 in terms of success, but the majority of the time he manages to catch you before you get too far. He finds it...fun seeing what plans you come up with. Of course, he doesn't treat your attempts as seriously as other yanderes would. He laughs it off, poking fun at you for how silly you are before taking you back inside the safe house. "Let's get back inside now, pookie." He would probably say while princess carrying you.

The man is a trained mercenary, so it's not that difficult to hunt you back down. So he takes everything in stride to your annoyance (probably, depending on you). If that wasn't bad enough, he skips over to your body lying on the floor after he just tripped you up with whatever (after another attempt). He'd sit right next to you, ask how was your time this attempt, and literally point out the mistakes you made during your escape. He won't really do anything drastic as punishment. He's pretty lenient when it comes to you, but he just doesn't want to hurt you. That's a line he wouldn't cross because he'd hate himself if you ever got hurt. By someone else's hands or his own.

Punishments with Wade are pretty simple; like disciplining a child. He'd either keep you in the room for you (until the time was up or when he got impatient/lonely and wanted your presence again) or take away any 'privileges' you have in this situation. He doesn't seem angry. Maybe a little annoyed in a playful sense, but not mad. However, despite his casual and jokester demeanor, he takes your attempts into consideration. Just in case.

I don't think he'd ask why you're trying to escape right away. It takes a while and certain buttons are being pushed to actually hit a nerve/get him to act serious. In this scenario, you'd probably just say you hate him in a moment of frustration or to get under his skin. Or in another, he'd just throw the question in the air without much weight to it and you'd answer with that. Either way, after hearing your words, he pauses for a moment. It's the first time where he's... at a loss for words. For a moment, it scares you a little.

That is until he goes back to talking and making jokes; brushing off your words. Despite that, a part of him was hurt by your words. Did you really mean that? Even with the way he presents himself to the world, Wade still has insecurities and fears. He tries to push the questions, doubts, and thoughts away. He couldn't think like that. Still, he needs to put them to rest in some way. Which is where his next actions will go.

He brings things from your old home. Even the bed you used to sleep in. You couldn't even begin wondering how in the world he was able to pull this off, especially with the vague answers he gave. This is his attempt to make things more comfortable for you. "You have such a comfy bed, you know. Gave it a test run; I couldn't resist. Like jumping on one of those beds at the mall." Wade already knew where you lived way before he kidnapped you. He smacks himself on the head for not considering bringing any of your belongings. "Of course! It was obvious from the start!"

This is essentially Wade's way of keeping you happy. Your happiness is his happiness. He'd hate to see you all depressed since your personality and smile are what he fell for. You becoming a husk of yourself would break his heart. So he's doing this for compensation.

[dontbesoweirdkira]

Hey, hi! I really liked your work about the harem! It's very interesting, in my opinion. And can I find out the continuation of this whole story, when the reader chooses some nondescript extra as his love?

“Okay. Let’s refocus our efforts, men. Y/N has a partner which mean we need to figure out how to get rid of them first. *Then*…we can finish killing each other in the tournament.”

A/N: I didn’t really want to continue the story because I was kinda lost on what to do with it but I thought this little Drabble would be funny. Thank you soooo muchhhhhhh💞

Pt.1

Warnings: obsessive and aggressive behavior

Requests: always open

Masterlist

When your partner came to visit you in the outworld, all eyes were on them. The way they had confidently strutted over and kissed you with a chill, “Hey baby. I missed you so much”, sent them into orbit.

I’m sorry you have a what—?

So you mean to tell them that you already had someone and basically all of this infighting was for nothing?!? It was never going to be one of them?

Nahhhh

you’re such a jokester. You did this to rile things up and make them jealous. So playful, you are.

Johnny of course was the first to go up to y'all and start his bullsh*t

“Y/N, this is absolutely hilarious. Was the attention I gave you not enough? You don’t have to try to make me jealous with this…punk. I would’ve gladly given you more if you just asked.”

Umm no Johnny this is actually your lover..

Kano was the next to bite

“Haha doll, that’s a real good one! There’s no way you’d want someone like ‘at. Tell you what, why don’t you come make some jokes over there with me..I’m a real good tickla’.”

Oh.. they are in reeeaaal bad denial

“Hey—let’s give Y/N some space. She’s allowed to have privacy and a personal relationship of her choosing—“

Luckily Fujin is the voice of reason and compassion

“—-even if they are so…unexpectedly unique.”

You had one job 😩

They definitely were still trying to process this whole situation. For the rest of the night all the men were whispering amongst each other and sending weird looks over their way. There was no way that was actually your partner. This was just all some ruse. They’ll be gone by the morning.

Nope. They weren’t and you were as affectionate and clingy as ever. You were just so smitten over them that it couldn’t have been fake. Every question about you, your lover could flawlessly answer and recall stories only someone close to you could.

They even showed pictures of you two together through the years on different occasions and at family gatherings…so either this was the greatest actor/stunt ever or you really was taken.

The guys loathe them so bad..

Not only did they take their beloved darling away from them but how could someone so average claim your heart so easily?

All of them felt like they were far better than them, like come on you have assassins, celebrities, monks, kahns and more at your disposal but you chose…them? What about them could possibly be better than what is right in front of you?

I can imagine the mk harem frequently going up to your partner and sizing them up. Like it’s so funny watching them pop out their chest and flex in order to seem more superior.

Oh and all the things I mentioned previously about the being super creepy and desperate…it’s cranked up to ten now.

They’ll purposely do..questionable things in front of your partner to get them upset and insecure. Especially the younger guys.

They’re all huge show offs during training sessions and can’t help but to be a little too comfortable with you.

Will steal garments (hoodies..ect) from your closet and then return them to your partner to make it seem like you were spending time with him.

We all know that Kano, Erron, Kabal, and Johnny have no filter. They’ll put things into your lover’s head to make them worried. These men love to talk big game and boast about anything they can. Sometimes they’re just flat out crass about their feelings towards you.

Shang tsung flants his wealth and constantly is gifting you money, clothes and other luxury goods…your lover could never afford it.

“I like to make sure that Y/N is well taken care of. All of her old stuff was hindering her beauty. I hope you don’t mind the initiative that I’ve taken…I figured it’d help you out since you possibly couldn’t have access to the aristocracy that I do.”

*has tried tricking your partner into drinking pure acid*

Raiden and Fujin are great at pretending they like your partner and wanna welcome them but are soooo shady.

“I appreciate you inviting me into your temple. It’s so cool that you both can control the weather. Wish I could do that.”

“Yes, it is quite a shame. It’s one of the many things that Y/N loves. We frequently make thunderous skies and wind storms for her whenever she’s feeling a bit down.”

“ Dont worry, though. I’m sure Y/N enjoys the fact that you can make her laugh and whatever other talents you possess.”

PLEASE—

Backhanded insults, threats, hazing and rough housing are frequent.

By the way, you cannot leave your partner alone…like at alll. Like take that poor thing into the bathroom with you because they are constantly watching and waiting for any moment to pounce on them.

This is the first time in months these men are bonding over something since you came along…the mutual disdain for your partner is so powerful.

They really need to do something about this relationship and a plan will be devised soon.

Scorpion, Sub-Zero, Kotal Khan, Erron and Shang Tsung, Kabal and Baraka all want to just flat out want them brutally killed in some kind of public execution so you’ll learn that having a lover outside of any of them is completely unacceptable.

Fujin, Night Wolf, Raiden, Jax and Liu Kang all want to try to…passionately pursue and manipulate..you out of the relationship. They don’t really want your partner to be harmed in any way.

Kung Lao and Johnny Cage think it would be hilarious to haniously humiliate them AND jump them so they’ll be left not only traumatized but filled with hatred for you.

The only reason why they haven’t gone through with any of these plans is because they can’t come to an agreement on which method is better.

I can’t imagine your partner being like “hey…I think they want me dead..”

“Oh that’s non sense, honey. They are a bit strange but I promise you that they are the sweetest to me.”

“They’re literally are into you and hate me for being with your partner. I heard them talking about getting rid of me.”

“Sure a few of them may have a crush on me but I promise you they like you! They’re just guys being guys.”

Yeah they are NOT safe in the slightest. You are owned by the harem, not by this nobody. I really hope they’ll learn how to fight very soon or dump you because your s/o is going to go missing soon. And they’ll make it look like an accident.

[willgrahamsbecoming]

ok yknow what fuck it i'm clownposting

introducing: hanniclowns

these are just my first sketches that i did at like... 2am last night. so i still need to work on them but basically they're a whiteface clown/auguste pair

it's actually sort of a subversion of their dynamic class-wise because the whiteface is higher class than the auguste, but i think in terms of the character dynamic it fits - the auguste is meant to kind of like. follow the directions of the white clown but ends up messing everything up (sometimes on purpose). and the auguste is usually on the receiving end of Tricks and Joke and ok honestly now that im writing this out i think in my 2am brain i justified it in a way that doesnt make sense but like look at hanniibals smug little auguste face

i might rework it kdfhgfh but the angle i was going for was hannibal being a little jokester and messing around with will

also bonus hanniguste in his plastic suit

[allaboutnayeli]

Hi! Love your writing!

Would you be able to write an aitana bonmati fic? Where the reader and aitana have been together for a while, but the reader is always jokingly flirting with her? Thank you!

lovely jokester ( aitana bonmati x reader )

prompt: your favorite pastime is to make flirty jokes towards your girlfriend

author notes: thank you! i hope you like this and it's what you wanted. tbh this fic is shorter than i wanted it to be but i wanted to post it anyways. enjoy!

you and aitana have been together for almost three years now. being with her has been one of the best relationships you ever had and very fun considering you two both play for barcelona. however you love to keep aitana on her toes. playing harmless pranks on her, saying obviously untrue things to try to trick her, and much more.

your favorite thing is do is definitely make corny flirty jokes towards the spainard. she always acts like she hates it, especially infront of other people, but you and her both know that she loves that part of you.

everyone was changing in the locker room, conversing with each other when you decide to strike once again. smirking as you look at aitana from across the room. she could feel your eyes on her (she knew by heart how you looked at her) but didn't think much of it. you had just pranked her yesterday so it wouldn't make sense to prank her again. you're a prankster, not evil.

good thing you weren't about to prank her. just show your girlfriend some love. you (try to) quietly sneak up behind aitana. she obviously can hear your footsteps even over the conversation between y'all's teammates. still the spainish player continues to slip her jersey on. laughing softly once you hug her from behind. planting a kiss on her cheek. "hola hermosa" you smile mischievously at her. aitana turns her a bit to look at you, with you two's foreheads touching. "hola bebe, what are you doing?" she says quietly.

you smile at her with that little mischievous smile you always do before pulling a prank on her. before she can even react you say (loud enough for the whole locker room to hear), "did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

aitana bursts out laughing, pushing you away gently. half of your teammates laugh as well and the other half just groan. you see alexia roll her eyes as she walks out. aitana had pushed you right into lucy's arms. "you're so.." your girlfriend roll her eyes in mock displeasure. you would respond with something snarky, but lucy had you in a headlock.

"i'm tired of you and those cringey pick-up lines" lucy says as she messes up your hair. "i am too" claudia says as she pasts by you and lucy to leave the locker room. you gasp out as the rest of your teammates agree. including your girlfriend.

"why is everyone ganging up on me?" you say as lucy lets you go. she also heads out of the locker room. leaving just aitana and you in the room. your girlfriend comes over to you, giving you a short kiss on the lips. smiling once she pulls away, "yes, it did hurt, amor."

you give her a cocky smirk as she lets go of you and leave out of the room. one win for you and those horrible jokes.

you and aitana were enjoying a lazy saturday, cuddling in y'all's bed. aitana has her face nuzzled in your neck with your arms around her waist but of course you had to break up the simple domesticity by making another flirty joke.

"you know, amor..." you say in that tone aitana knows way too well. she groans as she tries to place her hand over your mouth. as an effort to silence you, but to no use as you hold her wrist and stop her. "i'm so glad your father came in your mother. without them i wouldn't have my beautiful girlfriend" you say before bursting out laughing.

your girlfriend gets her wrist out of your grip as you laugh even louder. she punches you in the shoulder, groaning. "just shut up.." the spainish players rolls up off of you and grabs her phone. starting to scroll to find her mother's contact. "and i am totally telling her you said that," she says.

"wait! don't! i'm sorry, please don't tell" you playfully beg as you try to reach for aitana's phone. she slaps your hands away. "c'mon, if you tell than i won't be the favorite girlfriend in law anymore" you whine as you stop trying to be a phone thief.

"should had thought about that before you decided to make that stupid joke" aitana says as she puts her phone up to her ear. very ready to tell her mother exactly what you said.

sometimes your jokes backfire and this is one of those times. one loss for you and one win for aitana.