#just a funny (and bittersweet) coincidence

[paintsplash1712]

She’s finally done! After so much struggle come up with a good design (and some really good help from commenters on my WIP), she’s done!

Her name is Satoka Gojo (which fun fact is the feminine version of Satoru and has the same meaning) and I love her!

I’m so happy with how her hair came out, I was really struggling with it because I didn’t want her to just look like Mei Mei’s twin or something so when @stariepie suggested a wolf cut it instantly changed the whole vibe of the design (for the better).

I basically kept her canon uniform design but designing her casual look was more difficult than I thought because Gojo in canon literally just wears super expressive shirts and jeans and I wanted Fem! Gojo to wear similar but still look like a model so I gave her a big white cardigan to help frame the look.

I hope I made her eyes look good, they’re so detailed so trying to match that glassy sky look was definitely difficult in my more cel shading style.

What do you think? You think I did Gojo justice?

[amirasainz]

Hi I saw you are looking for request!!

pierre gasly/baby sainz

where shes dating pierre post breakup with his ex. Kika is just disrespectful of the new couple dragging them on the internet and keeps showing up to races in the paddock looking for his attention. Baby sainz handles business by getting into a fist fight with her in a club after celebrating Carlos P3 and it's all over the social media. It makes headlines. Maybe Pierre was a bit drunk and kika baby sister!sainz showed her what's up. Pierre finds it funny and super attractive.

Thank you x

THE OTHER WOMAN

Hi guys. I hope you like reading this request.. THIS IS NO HATE TOWARDS KIKA! She actually is one of my favourite wags. @spookystitchery My requests are always open. Please send some! Feedback is always welcome. -XoXo

The music boomed loudly through the nightclub. In the middle of the club, Pierre and Amira danced sinfully to the rhythm. Little did the couple realize that they were being watched by none other than Kika.

Now, let’s rewind a bit.

After a massive fight about his job in Formula 1, Pierre and Kika decided to break up. Three months later, Pierre was frequently seen with Amira Sainz, Carlos’s precious little sister. However, it took another three months for them to officially confirm their relationship. And let’s just say the announcement garnered more attention on social media than any World Cup finale ever.

Of course, Kika got wind of their new relationship. Initially, she thought she could live with it. But as she witnessed how much Pierre and Amira became the “it” couple, she couldn’t help but start to harbor resentment. Specifically, she despised their relationship.

When Kika saw what Amira posted, she copied her actions, trying to make it seem like a coincidence. It only took a couple of posts before fans realized what she was doing. Kika even liked every comment that went against the couple.

The situation had escalated beyond mere jealousy. Kika’s emotions churned like a tempest, fueled by resentment and heartache. Pierre and Amira, blissfully unaware of her turmoil, continued their dance—a celebration of love and shared moments.

Kika’s anger simmered as she watched them twirl, their laughter echoing through the nightclub. She clenched her fists, her mind racing with thoughts of revenge. The Suzuka GP had been the tipping point—the final straw that snapped her fragile restraint.

When Pierre excused himself to fetch drinks, Kika seized her opportunity. She descended to the dance floor, her steps purposeful. Amira stood there, an unwitting accomplice in Kika’s vendetta. The room pulsed with music, drowning out the chaos in Kika’s mind.

“Look at what the cat dragged in,” Kika sneered, her voice dripping with venom. Amira glanced up, her eyes wide with surprise. “Oh, Kika. Hi,” she replied, her tone lacking enthusiasm. Amira wasn’t the sharpest tool in the shed, but even she couldn’t defend Kika’s irrational hatred any longer.

Kika leaned in, her breath hot against Amira’s ear. “You stole him from me,” she whispered, her fingers grazing Amira’s arm. “But tonight, I’ll steal your joy.” With that, she spun away, leaving Amira bewildered and Pierre’s fate hanging in the balance.

The nightclub pulsed around them, unaware of the storm brewing on the dance floor. Kika’s heart raced; revenge tasted bittersweet. She would ruin their night, even if it meant sacrificing her own sanity. The music swirled, a backdrop to her unraveling resolve.

As Pierre returned, drinks in hand, he found Kika gone and Amira staring after her. The dance continued, but the harmony had shattered. Kikas wrath had ignited a fire—one that threatened to consume them all.

And so, under the neon lights, the tangled threads of love, hate, and desperation wove a dangerous dance—one that would leave scars long after the music faded. When Carlos called Pierre over, Kika took her cance to ruin Amira' sainity.

"You know, when Pierre and I were together he used to performe phenomenal. And the only results with you as his partner are horrible." Amira was more than confused. "What…."" You might think that all the things he does with you are sweet and lovely." The more she talked the more Amira was getting annoyed. And her blood started heating up. "Everything he ever did with you, he already did with me." And now it was truly boiling. "I bet i'm even better in bed than you will ever be. He even said so himself. That i was always leaving his world rocking." Amira started balling her hands in fists. "Did he take you to meet his parents? Did he tell you that we were talking about our own kids? Thinking about marr-" Before she was able to say another word, the Sainz woman already hit her in the face.

"Perra estúpida. ¡Cállate la boca! Si te quería tanto, ¿por qué te dejó por mí, estúpida?" she yelled in Kika's face. In less than two seconds the attention was on them. Before Kika had the chance to hit her back, the two of them were separated.

Pierre picked her up around her waist. Amira however wasn't done. "Es patético que dediques tu tiempo a odiarnos. ¿Quieres pelea? Soy de la puta España. Puedo darte una buena, estúpido idiota." Pierre quickly took her out from the nightclub

"Amour, what the fuck was that? Are you hurt? What the fuck were you thinking?" he ranted angrily. She quickly turned to him: "The fuck was i thinking? Was defending our relationship because that stupid girl was being disrespectful. She said-" Before she could utter another word, Pierre started kissing her.

"Ma cherie, you have no idea how incredibly sexy you are right now. Let's get back to the hotel so we can….."

[king-paimon]

Houseki No Kuni Chapter 108 Thoughts: Everything Stays....

Hello all. I hope the month of April was good to everyone. It was alright for me, though I'm just in awe by how fast it went! Time really goes by too quickly as you get older.

Speaking of time, would you look at that? The final chapter of Houseki no Kuni was released! 108 chapters over the course of 12 years. And I've been following it for nearly 5 of those years! Wow! That is quite the feat, Ms. Ichikawa.

I'd been waiting for this day for a long time, and the feeling is bittersweet, with the overlaying feeling of relief. This emotional rollercoaster that Ms. Ichikawa had sent us on has finally reached it's dock.

Phos's story is finally complete. What a ride it had been!

Now the question is: Was I satisfied?....

I'll do my best to answer this. I don't know how long this post will be, but I'm hoping that it won't be too long (edit: Oops. I was wrong.) And as always, please feel free share your own thoughts if you're interested!

Here we go:

Phos's True End: Was It Satisfying?

I reread this chapter a few times to answer this question and to be honest, I still reach the same conclusion: It was fitting. Not absolutely bad or 100% amazing, but in terms of Phos's whole journey throughout this story, I think this was a fitting ending for Phos, and that's good. And if anything else, it's a little ironic.

I mentioned in my last post that I thought it was funny that the remaining piece of Phos had become the youngest/newest member of the pebble species much like how they originally were at the beginning off the whole manga. It seems though, the similarities don't end there because of this little interaction between Eyeball/Pita-pat and Pebble Phos:

I'm sure this was supposed to be a little cheeky conversation and Eyeball/Pita-pat didn't really mean it. But still, this was an interesting exchange to include in this final chapter, especially right before it's implied that Eyeball/Pita-pat passed away.

One intriguing story choice Ichikawa made was having Pebble Phos continuously fall apart near the end to the point that they become a small spec. To be honest, I was not sure how to feel about this part when I first read, especially considering how now there's hardly any of Phos left now. Like, after Eyeball/Pita-pat saved that last bit of Phos so they could have a nice life away from humanity, it'd be unfair for them to break apart again to nothing after all of that. But I did like how the pebbles decided to view Pebble Phos' changes; that their fragments surely became beautiful comets that would brighten someone's day. And that shot with original Phos was nice...

Also, I saw the post that implied that Ichikawa released this final chapter around the same time that a rare famous comet was supposed to be seen on Earth. I want to say that I think it was a pure coincidence, but I'm not putting anything past this author!

This chapter made me think of that one song from Adventure Time: Everything Stays. If you haven't heard of it, please give a listen. It's a song about life and the course of change. It focuses on how even if things appear to stay the same over the course of time, changes still occur, even if subtle. Phos certainly changed a lot throughout their story through intense mind and physical altering events. But I also think they changed subtly even during the less intense moments. I think the moments in this final chapter fit with this song, too. Phos was always evolving, even when it didn't appear so. Through their interactions and lack thereof with others and their environment, Phos was always changing and growing, ever so subtly. And even in this last chapter, Phos is still evolving and that'll likely never end.

Interesting... after thinking about it some more, I think I feel a little more satisfied with how this chapter/story ended. I'm glad that Ms. Ichikawa didn't pull some other twist near the end; that certainly would have ruined it for me. Am I 100% happy with how Phos's story ended? I don't think so. But to me, it's a fitting end.

But what do I think about the series as a whole?

When The Journey Ends: Was It Worth It?

There are very few manga or written stories that had me wanting to see how things end because more often than not, there aren't that many stories that I've read to completion. Part of it is because I don't want the story to end; basically, I'd have the thought process that if I don't know how the story ends, the story doesn't end! Perfect logic (sarcasm). Though this usually happens because I lose interest or because the story goes in directions that I don't like, I'd say one of the main reasons I end up dropping a series is because of how a story ends. How a story ends can completely change one's opinion of a story, and I've seen my fair share of stories that end badly. Sometimes the ending is abrupt and not satisfying, especially if it was lead by a big build up, or the ending is a result of a jarring story pivot that seems to come out of left field. It just seems that many creators don't know how to end their story well. And if I like a story a lot, sometimes I'm too scared to see how it ends. Partially because I don't want the story to end, but mostly because I don't want the end to ruin my experience.

Houseki no Kuni is a unique case for me. I know I've mentioned this before but I'll state it again: I don't think I've ever been so invested in a story like this before. Though that investment had dwindled over time, partially due to me developing new interests, life, and being occasionally dissatisfied with certain story choices, I wanted to see this how this story would end no matter what. And now that it's done, I'm glad I stuck it out.

Was this story perfect? No. There were several story decisions that I wish was either told differently or completely omitted that could have made the story stronger in my opinion.

Did I get a too invested in this story? During certain points, most definitely haha. I remember getting very emotional about certain chapters when I first started making this series of meta posts. I remember seeing some posts from people stating that they no longer liked the manga because of the direction it was going and in some cases, I could see where they were coming from.

Do I regret getting so invested in this story? No. No I don't. Despite not liking certain story aspects, I do not regret getting invested in this story. Though the story was not perfect, this was such a unique experience that I'm grateful to have gone through.

I plan on talking more about how I feel about Houseki no Kuni as a whole in another post. I intend to delve into what I loved about it and what I wish was different. While I could include that stuff here, I think this post is long enough. I've already started working on it, but I know it'll be a while before it's done; you bet there will be some parts with me ranting a little haha

But long story short, despite some grievances I have with some parts of the story, I feel satisfied with how it ended. And I'm glad that I read this series.

What Happens Next: Thank you, HnK Fandom

I want to thank those who've read, liked, and even commented on my posts! I didn't think so many of you would like, let alone read, my longwinded messy posts. I loved every feedback I got, even the ones that didn't agree with me. You made me love being part of this niche fandom. Like I said in the previous section, I have at least one more post that I want to make detailing everything I feel about Houseki No Kuni as a whole. I might make another one that's more for fun, but we'll see. I encourage anyone who's interested to share your own thoughts on the post! I seriously love reading different perspectives.

But after those posts, I don't know how involved I'll be in the fandom afterwards. I may repost some art and other people's meta posts on occasion. But when it comes to meta commentary, these will likely be my last posts about HnK. I have other fandoms that I like to follow, though I don't make posts about them. Perhaps I will, though I know they will be nothing like the posts I've made about Houseki no Kuni. This was the only series I've ever felt compelled to analyze so deeply, which makes it special for me. If I were to post anything about the other stuff I'm into, it'll most likely be of fanart that I made for my own personal enjoyment. I know scare many of my followers away since they'll not be HnK related. But who knows? I haven't made any HnK art in a long time... Maybe one of these days, I can try to make some HnK art again. I have some unfinished pieces on my computer that's now years old. Yeah, I should finish them when I have the time. That'd be a fun little send off.

Anyhow, if you are interested, please hang around for my final HnK meta posts! And when it's out, please please PLEASE share your own thoughts in it! Don't be afraid to share your opinions. I promise I don't bite.

So that's it. These are my thoughts of the final chapter of Houseki no Kuni. I might add more to it, but I'm fine with what I put out. Wow... I still can't believe I got into this series 5 years ago! So much had changed in my life since then. Despite everything, it was worth it.

Thank you again for reading my jargon. It means a lot and I can't wait to post my true final meta posts about Houseki no Kuni.

What a ride this was.

Until next time...

[ceilidho]

tell me something nuclear winter ghoap NOW!! (bo)

BO!!!!! ok you wanna read what i've got so far?? it's not very much but here's what i have for my project that's tentatively titled "permafrost"

At first, it comes as a series of lights in the distance, a gentle rain like a cascade of falling stars. And then, it goes dark.

It happens over the course of several hours. By the time the dust settles—and it never settles, never really settles, always hangs in the air and renders it unbreathable, unlivable—and the sirens quiet and the last few screams die off, there’s hardly anything left. Hardly anything left living. 

The initial blast doesn’t reach up the country and, for that, Johnny lasts the months after the first nuclear bombs are dropped. Somedays, he can barely recollect the hours after the initial impact; they come back in foggy chunks, stumbling out of his house, boots crunching over the glass that had been blown clean out of the windows, covering his eyes against the flash of light and staring out into the distance at the mushrooming cloud of smoke just cresting the horizon. The bottom falling out of him at the sight.

More bombs hit other parts of the continent, several in Russia, throughout Asia and down into Africa, and across the pond as well. The world goes up in flames in an hour. In his cabin up in the Scottish Highlands, crutches jammed under his arms in his haste to limp his way outside, he sees the blast and then hears it a minute or so later. A roar rippling through the air. 

It shatters the world. 

In the present day, the boat sways where it’s roped to the wharf, the waters choppy. Johnny sits on the deck in a foldout chair, fastening a new head onto his ax, fixing the metal wedge over the eye to hold it in place. The blade is cleaner than the one that’d just cracked, sharp from being run over the whetstone. He pulls his scarf back over his nose when it slips down his face.

His cabin in the Highlands hadn’t been a viable choice for longer than a few months, not after the cold had finally begun to set in. Too far up north. He’d made his way down south over the course of weeks, bringing with him only as much as he could carry. A bittersweet goodbye to the summer home of his youth, a hand laid flat against the door before turning on his heel and starting the long trek south.

It’s not any warmer farther down south, particularly around the coast where the wind gets bitterly cold, sinking into the bone. He’d found the boat on a whim, the only structure still relatively intact and, most importantly, isolated.

Making his home on an old boat might not win him any awards for brightest idea, but the downside to traveling further into the country, away from the untenable glacial weather up north, is that it coincides with the areas where the bombs were dropped, leaving limited options for shelter.

Months pass. Years pass. 

His ankle healed funny all those years ago from prolonged bouts of starvation before desperation kicked in and from traveling miles on foot. He’d driven a portion of the way down north until the roads had outlived their usefulness—asphalt cracked, chunks of bedrock spiking up out of the ground. The rest he’d managed with his crutches and a single backpack, leaving the car to rot some three hundred or so miles up the country.

It's some strange occurrence, Johnny thinks at age thirty-something (he’s lost count), that his lot be murky, for death to miscount. He witnesses an apocalypse and comes out the other side. Happenstance. Coincidence, that he’s discharged from the military not a month before the first bomb hits London and leaves a crater that never fills, that never heals. A pockmark in the earth. 

His lips twist bitterly. The price of a long life is a barbed and slick soul. 

​​Immortality sometimes occurs to him, or godship, but neither option rests well with him and Johnny wonders if this is how gods are born: not of sea foam but of inevitability, of miscalculation, of death's err, of smallness, of acorns he carried as a child through pastures behind his summer house.

He sniffs. Cuts that memory off at the quick.

Johnny gives himself a couple more minutes to fiddle around with the ax before looping it into the gear loops on his backpack and buckling it in.

[MISSING STUFF HERE]

Much of the city has returned to nature, rubble encased in snow and ice; the stores have long been looted or reduced to ash from the blast. 

[dirtytomatoedwrites]

I WAS NEVER THERE - PART 3

FIRST TEMPTATION

Summary: Steve returned to the 1940s to find the life he thought he wanted. But desire has its own plans—and he’s found someone who knows exactly how to feed it.

Paring:  Steve Rogers/Fem!Reader Steve/Peggy

Warning: 18+ mature dark themes. Smut, Drama, Romance, BitterSweet / Possessive / Obsessive Behaviour, Cheating.

Story Masterlist. Part 1 is here if you'd like to read it.

Strictly 18+ No Minors to Interact. 

You hadn’t planned to skip this month’s dinner party.

These gatherings were a fixture in your life, a tradition started by your grandfather and his peers, meant to bridge connections across departments.

It was as habitual as brushing your teeth or stopping by your favorite bakery, Palma’s, for a bagel on the way to work. But last night, the thought of going filled you with a prickling unease you couldn’t quite define—an anxious, restless feeling that left you feeling out of sorts.

And rather than unpacking whatever that meant, you made a different choice.

For the first time in a long while, you stayed home.

You told yourself it was what you needed: space, a breather, a little distance. After all, it was just another dinner—another evening you’d honestly be glad to miss if it weren’t for family and social obligations. And perhaps, by not seeing Steve, whatever was brewing between you (not that there was anything) would finally be laid to rest.

So you spent your Friday pampering yourself. You took a luxurious bubble bath, started a new book, cooked yourself dinner, and listened to Bing Crosby on the radio as you painted your nails before bed.

But as Saturday rolled around, your plan for distance felt fragile, like a flimsy thread unraveling with each stray thought of Steve.

You tried to shake it off as you stepped outside. The sky was a dull gray, thick with the promise of rain as you wove through the city, pushing back memories that tried to surface. You’d given yourself space, hadn’t you? This was supposed to help, to clear your head. So why were you still thinking about him?

A few fat raindrops splattered on the pavement, and you ducked your head, hunching against the damp chill as you hurried through your errands.

Then, you saw him.

You almost stumbled when you did. Across the street, his tall figure loomed on the sidewalk, holding a folded newspaper above his head against the rain, his dark coat a stark silhouette against the city’s gray wash. Droplets cascaded from his makeshift shield, falling in a steady rhythm around him.

Every instinct screamed at you to turn back, but irritation burned in your chest. Of all places, why here? Was he actually going out of his way to find you?

You took a breath, squaring your shoulders, and crossed the street toward him. The faint, pleased smile that curled his lips as you approached only irritated you further.

“Steve,” you said coolly, giving him a curt nod.

“What a coincidence…” he replied, that familiar, arrowed smile sparking to life.

"Funny, I was thinking the same thing," you retorted, your tone sharp. Whatever game he was playing, you weren’t here for it.

“Shouldn’t you be somewhere else? With someone else?” you asked, the question slipping out, unguarded. For a moment,  Steve’s smile faltered, just for a second, as though he’d been caught. And he knew it—you both did. But instead of shying away, he held your gaze, something raw and unashamed in the depths of them.

“Where were you last night?” he countered, direct as ever, the question cutting past your defenses.

You blinked, thrown off by his boldness. There was no reason for him to ask, no reason he should even want to know. But the way he asked, the way he looked at you, it was like not only did he expect an answer, but you owed him one.

You shrugged, breaking eye contact and looking out into the drizzle, letting the rain cool the flush rising to your cheeks.

“Decided to skip. I just… needed a break,” you murmured, feeling the weight of his stare even as you turned your head.

“That doesn’t sound like you.”

“Well, considering you don’t know me, that’s a loaded assumption, don’t you think?”

“Maybe.” He paused, gaze sharp yet teasing. “Or maybe you’re just used to dodging the people who might get close enough to know you.”

The words hit like an accusation wrapped in velvet. You tried to shrug it off, but his look—direct, unwavering—was unnerving.

“You seem awfully invested in what I do or don’t need.”

“Just making an observation,” he said, glancing away before meeting your eyes again. “You wouldn’t be here in front of me now if you weren’t at least a little curious too.”

You crossed your arms, deflecting his quiet insistence. “Anyone can be curious, Steve. It doesn’t mean I agree with what you’re saying.”

“Of course you don’t agree,” he replied smoothly, with a slight, knowing smile. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.” His tone carried a quiet triumph, like he’d already won something small. Then, without warning, he dropped it: “Have coffee with me.”

For a second, you blinked, thrown by the sudden shift. He didn’t ask, didn’t phrase it as a suggestion—it was an invitation as sure as his steady gaze. And you couldn’t ignore the quiet thrill it sent through you, even as you knew better.

When you didn’t respond, he took a step closer, his eyes fixed, determined. “Have coffee with me,” he repeated softly, but this time, there was no room for deflection.

You scoffed, letting out a sharp laugh to cover the flutter in your chest. “Steve, no—absolutely not. You’re engaged. Or did you forget?”

He lifted a brow, that smirk softening. “Oh, I remember. But coffee’s not a marriage proposal, is it?”

You squared your shoulders, hoping your voice sounded steadier than you felt. “I don’t think Peggy would see it that way.”

Steve’s gaze darkened, but he didn’t look away. “Peggy would see it as two people who happened to bump into each other on the street, escaping the rain for a few minutes.” His voice softened. “And that’s all I’m asking for. Just coffee.”

You started to respond, but he leaned closer, his voice lowering as his eyes held yours. “What are you so afraid of?”

A pulse of unease ran through you, enough to make you look away for a second. “Afraid? Hardly,” you replied, brushing off the gnawing sensation in your chest. “I just don’t make a habit of getting coffee with… just anyone.”

“Anyone?” His low chuckle sounded more like a challenge. “I don’t think either of us believes that.”

The words lingered, electric. Everything about his tone, his look, made it impossible to pretend he didn’t mean more. You both knew accepting this wouldn’t just mean coffee—it would be a step toward something you couldn’t take back. And he knew it too, which made his invitation all the more dangerous.

“Steve,” you murmured, your voice thin, the warning barely there. “This… this isn’t a good idea.”

He tilted his head as he held your gaze, the barest hint of a smile tugging at his lips. “Or maybe,” he said quietly, lowering the newspaper from above his head “it just is.”

His eyes stayed locked on yours, a sea of blue, unrelenting, daring you to make the choice. The rain had picked up, a steady fall that clung to your coat, to his hair, the whole world dampened to gray. But you couldn’t deny it any longer. Something in you cracked.

Slowly, you nodded, accepting the risk and the thrill that came with it. “Fine,” you whispered at last, letting out the words like an admission. “One coffee. Just one.”

A flicker of triumph crossed his face as he stepped aside, gesturing for you to walk ahead with a gentlemanly gesture that felt almost ironic under the circumstances.

“One coffee,” he repeated, voice lingering on the words. And as you walked together through the rain-slicked streets, each step felt like a quiet surrender, a choice that couldn't be undone.

PART 4.

Thanks for reading if you're enjoying the story please like / reblog. Thanks so much x

[noraigo]

since i'm still overdosed on aouboom cocaine, i wanted to ask a question: if gmmtv2025 announces our desired aouboom series, who would you like to be the director?

in all honesty, i have a couple of directors in my mind which can guide them to a suitable series:

>backaof: out of all directors in gmmtv, i think he’s my favourite albeit his flaws, as any director has. my most beloved bl series of all time is a tale of thousand stars, but i’ve also watched plenty of series that were under his hand that i enjoyed equally, being last twilight the last one. his works mostly highlight unique storytellings which aren’t always settled in cliché colleges. that leads to different kinds of relationships, with slow romance but great character development. cinematography and intimacy are his forte, in my point of view. if he happens to pick them for his next project in 2025, you must get ready for the angst, though. there are times his characters don’t know what happiness is for some time.

>jojo: similarly, i’ve enjoyed his works and his way of directing is quite different from p’aof. his stories mostly focus on different queer experiences, since he bases them on real life situations or is inspired by old-school series/films. personally, he’s a bit darker and much more explicit when it comes to storytelling and his characters hold a depth and complexity that sometimes fall into the grey category. i wholeheartedly believe that aou and boom can portray this description, we only have to take a look at their acting as jeng and pok in hidden agenda, whose relationship was the most complicated out of all their romances they’ve acted in yet still managed to give us a bittersweet story, even with their reduced screentime. what kind of love story would be like? different social status? forbidden romance?

>xiseks: director of vice versa, he led aou and boom to be “shipped” thanks to their characters aou (note: this is so funny to me) and fuse, who had an implied romantic interest at the very end of the series. his style of directing is pleasing, but not to everyone’s taste. xiseks stands out for making small references for his series, like theory of love and classic romance movies and vice versa and the use of classic bl references — and, of course, the use of colors as symbolism. my experience with his series is enjoyable, he manages to capture the peak of a love story and transmit it to the viewers. also, i think he knows aou and boom enough to work with them, as he has worked with them previously like i mentioned before.

i think we can agree that aou and boom deserve their own spotlight in a well-told story, with characters that can easily win our hearts and make their love palpable. considering we are is officially their breakthrough series, many new fans gathered to ask for a series starring them, but it also gathered mixed opinions on whether them being main characters would make them lose their spark or not deliver enough emotion. i 100% believe that their acting and overflowing chemistry are more than enough to keep us hooked. also, they can’t be the secondary couple forever! regardless if gmmtv makes them an official fixed pairing or not, the actors themselves asked for a series with the two of them.

on a positive note, i wasn’t the only one to notice that gmm is doing reruns with series in which aou and boom have appeared before (the eclipse with aou, then vice versa and enchanté with the two of them). though it might be a mere coincidence, i think it’s not delusional to have some hope for the upcoming lineup.

for once, i want to trust very, very little in gmmtv. i just hope it doesn't completely disappoint me.

[vestaclinicpod]

Audio Drama Sunday - 17th December ✨

Happy #AudioDramaSunday! Here’s what I’ve been listening to this week! 

🤠 @caravanradio was the flickering fire in this cold winter week. I’m relistening and having an even better time the second go round knowing how it all Pans Out. It's so funny and clever and I ADORE these characters. I’m absolutely desperate for season 2. Please, if you haven’t listened to Caravan, you absolutely MUST. 

🧳 Travelling Light by @monstrousproductions (6) EEK SO CUTE. I made so many eeky-squeepy noises listening to this episode. Cute baby aliens are my kryptonite. 

🌒 I’ve started the Moonbase Theta Out Q&A (@monkeymanproductions) and loving the answers so far! Hearing that Deej would put the Caravan characters on the moon when I’ve just started relistening this week was a perfect coincidence (I AGREE entirely by the way). 

⚓️ @eelerschoice (6) that was kind of bittersweet 🥺 there was so much action in this episode, I loved it!! Very excited to hear what kinds of questions come up in the Q+A!

🏢 @somewhereohio (S2E2) variance is only variance if you’re comparing against something different HELL YEAH LET’S GO. Also! Oh, no! Lapis! Oh no!! 

I'm so excited to listen to the latter half of Caravan S1 this week. I keep thinking about all the fun things to come and eeeeekk!!!! Hope everyone is having a lovely festive period!! 

[accio-victuuri]

CPN : cute dogs, missing lyrics, interview clues, evisu numbers, :01 & the continuing bottled joy saga 🫶🏼

it’s been a while since i made a proper post like this that talks about various cpns going around bxg circles recently so here you go. have some candy!

let’s start with a fake story that seem to be close to this video of zz coaxing cute dogs and him “complaining” about them rejecting him…

WDB’s run was around early feb to june filming and then this fake rumor was released january 2023 and it is ZZ complaining to WYB, it talked about when zz was filming someone brought an animal and it didn’t want to look at him. It was always facing away, ( kinda like these dogs ) and he said “ oh look at it. it doesn’t care about me”. the rumor even said he was squatting down, which is what he was doing in the video. even him saying bye-bye.

As with all fake rumors, take this with a grain of salt. There are about 4 accounts on weibo that labels themselves as fake resources and most of them post stuff like this. Just day to day occurrence between the boys. It’s up to you if believe it or not that these things are more truth than just coincidence. the fact that a couple of them turn out to be validated later on by photos/videos is a reason why cpfs love it so much.

( the cutest and goodest puppy 🥹🥹🥹 )

It’s so funny, these cute dogs know that he already has a puppy at home so they are wary of getting close 😂😂😂😂

• In BTF’s behind the scenes video, there was a part where he was singing along with his castmates to a Jay Chou song ( Sunny Day ) and he skipped singing certain lines. The one he sang goes : Once upon a time, someone loves you for a long time…

and then he skipped singing the following parts :

However, the wind gradually blows the distance far away

但偏偏 風漸漸 把距離吹得好遠

It's hard to love one more day

好不容易 又能再多愛一天

But at the end of the story you seem to say goodbye

但故事的最後妳好像還是說了拜拜

BXGs are interpreting it as him adapting ZZ’s superstition of not saying “bad things” ( remember the boat scene in the cql bts too ) and in this case the bittersweet lyrics of parting from someone you have loved for a long time. An example of this with ZZ singing at Double 11 night and he did not sing the “bad lines” too.

You may say that this is just WYB not wanting to sing along anymore and he was doing something else, but as a cpf who believes in certain things— it’s very sweet. 💕 They are so careful when it comes to their relationship that they don’t wanna jinx it like this.

• ZZ had an interview for WDB and one of the things I loved about it was how he described true love as a flow of companionship. To those who are not watching WDB, his character had a childhood first love ( hongling ) and he described that as that fiery and unrestrained kind of youthful love. But the one he ended up with and marrying ( xiaomei ) is one that’s like a steady stream ( flow of water ). It reminds me of him and WYB. No. Listen. They might have started bickering and as kids who fell in love but it grew into something more steady as the years went by. It’s why i love domestic stories of LRLG cause it shows how their love is. They make the most mundane things sweet, it’s not always bit gestures and fanfic type stories — more often, it’s almost boring because they are literally living their day to day life together.

There was also a part where the interviewer was asking about his line saying “i will only miss you” to hongling and he said something like, he has thousand things he wants to say but ended up with that, the whole I MISS YOU being secretly said is something we CPN. both of them using “…” on their posts and when this comes up, it means i miss you

• In the EVISU video, the numbers are so sus!

13 (yizhan) 28 ( love bo ) 33 (zhan zhan )

and then below, that 23.

Don’t judge. CPFs are really just so sensitive with numbers. 😅

• The posted today and we think that ZZ missed the time. WYB is 18:01 and ZZ was 19:02! Maybe he meant to match and make it 19:01 but he missed!

• Here is a good place to catch up if you don’t know anything about the whole Bottled Joy saga — but this example is the latest. before this, they posted a video making green tea ( like the one in cql they shared i supposed ) and ofc turtles were cackling. but this one goes back to the cpf-friendly designs. they shared these two bottles for their 6.18 sales and we noticed that the colors looks sus. appearing to reference wyb’s panther and zz’s guangdian art. what a good pair ✨

-END

[pencilofawesomeness]

I'M COMING IN (hug requests) lemme preface this with I AM BAD AT CHOOSING, I HAVE MULTIPLES ALWAYS because I'd hate to give the ONE IDEA you don't wanna do. Pick one.

Jamil and Kalim (could be sad, could be bittersweet)

Azul and Jamil (lmao good luck with context on that)

Lilia and Malleus ("that's my boy")

Malleus and Leona HAHAHA

Floyd and Riddle (carrying around like teddy bear perhaps)

Rook and Trey (listen...agenda)

Kalim and Malleus!!

Epel and possibly shocked Vil/Full Pomily hug (post book 5...)

Idia Ortho and Grim :>

Do not do all of these. They are options. I will end you if you try to do them all LMAO

When Lilia has to float to give his ridiculously tall eldest son a head pat (one that he desperately needs)

Anyways I latched onto the father-son one, bolstered by my Malleus-needs-hugs-and-meaningful-affection agenda, and it turned a little more bittersweet than intended, but Lilia turned out really soft and I went all in.

And, even though you definitely said only do one, I had a funny idea, so here's a bonus not-quite-a-hug sketch underneath the cut

So the "Malleus and Leona" prompt inspired me to do a very silly redraw of my other favorite pair of frenemy goofballs. It's definitely not hugging, and the fact that they choose petty cat fight tactics realllll close to each other, when they are capable of much better fighting tactics, is definitely just a coincidence and not because they are enjoying themselves and their petty skirmishes.

[allthefujoshiunite]

Hi, Nora.....do you mind if I ask for BL recs? A few of my favorite ships are Damen/Laurent from 'Capive Prince' novels (kind, protective, bigger build seme x clever, kuudere, beautiful uke) and Andrew/ Neil from from 'All for The Game : Foxhole Court' novels (both have strong personalities, can be reversible couples, looks weak but actually strong)?

Sorry for this long ask, but can I ask, for BL recs that have the same vibe as one or a few of them (up above)?

Feel free if you want to answer or not....

Thanks so much for your blog, that have become like my guideline (because I'm quite new in BL)....

Thanks again....

Hello! No worries, it's a joy for me to recommend BL and if people enjoy my selection, it makes me all the more happy! However, unfortunately, I haven't read the novels you mentioned... So I feel like my recommendations will be way off the mark but I'll try my best ~

My Dear Agent (Ebino Bisuke): This one has bigger, kind, and protective seme and a cool, beautiful, and funny uke (not a kuudere, though). I not only enjoyed but laughed a lot, and the art is gorgeous so highly recommended! Can be read on INKR (or you can buy it from any place you can get TOKYOPOP titles).

Lullaby of the Dawn (Ichika Yuno): Another bigger, protective, puppy seme with a reserved/detatched, beautiful uke pairing with fantasy elements. I've only read the first volume so far but it's super emotional and beautiful inside and out! Can be read on Bookwalker (or any other place where you can get ShuCream titles).

Our Paradise (Greeneer): My last big & cute, puppy seme with reserved, beautiful uke recommendation that I'm nowadays going crazy over is Our Paradise. You won't regret giving this webtoon a chance! Not only the main characters, but their friend circles and the second couple we started to explore more in 2nd season are also fun & really interesting! And obviously, I need MOAR people to scream about it with me. Can be read for free with daily pass on Webtoon.

Just Love, The Monster (Tsukizuki Yoshi): This is a high school delinquent x honor student kind of story. Both MCs are headstrong and fight a lot obviously, but it was fun to read! It's in Futekiya's library, can be read with your subscription plan.

Total Submission (Tsushiko): This is another delinquent x honor student story with dom/sub element that I love! If you're okay with spicy BL and you love seeing hotheaded characters getting tamed by their sweet and kind senpai, this is for you. Available on Futekiya's subscription plan.

We Aren't Secure (Sojima Yuco): This title is an Omegaverse set in high school. MCs are childhood friends and the story has a bittersweet tone to it, and it's definitely nice to read characters who are on more equal terms in Omegaverse instead of an apparent power hierarchy in between. Available on Futekiya's subscription plan.

BONUS

God is Probably Left-Handed (Mushiba): If you've read any of Mushiba's works before, you might know it takes time to warm up to their stories. They are full of surprises, wacky coincidences, and interesting characters that you don't usually see in BL. But these are the exact reasons why I love Mushiba's works so much, and they are quite unforgettable. God is Probably Left-Handed fits into only one of the criteria you're looking for (I won't mention what it is so I won't spoil the story) but I was sooo surprised the way the manga ended! If you're looking for something different to read, Mushiba is your artist. Highly recommended!

As I have said, I haven't read the novels soI just went with whatever seemed suitable to the dynamics you mentioned, hopefully you'll find something that'll be of interest to you. Thank you so much for the ask and have a nice day!

[anonymousredactedconfessions]

About the Yuurivoice potentially copying Redacted anon

Let's go in order of how reasonable to make these cases actually are:

So first of the most asinine one out of the way: "a spunky guy with a boston accent"? By which, i'm gonna assume, you mean to imply that Alphonse might be a copy of Milo? Alphonse, who's first ever video on youtube was uploaded in 2018 ? A year in which Erik hadn't even created the redacted channel yet (that would be 2019) let alone uploaded the first ever Milo video (that would be 2020) In conclusion, you didn't even bother to do the most basic checking of upload dates before making this accusation, didn't you?

Next we have the demons: if you actually went and checked the dates of uploads (again) you can see that when Big Red's (Yuurivoice's demon character) first video was uploaded (october 1st 2020) the only videos featuring a demon on Eriks channel at that time were the first and second Caelum videos (and potentially the first Gavin one i think but the date on that one is now different because Erik had to edit and reupload that one)

There's literally no similarities between Caelum and Big Red besides being demons (a very common trope that Erik didn't invent, not to mention how differently demons actually function on these two channels) and being a bit stupid (in my personal opinion pretty different kinds of stupidity/naivity) and Big Red and Gavin have even less in common. In conclusion, are you serously gonna say that Big Red is a copy of specifically Caelum (based on just his first two videos!) or Gavin (based just on his first video!)? Or did you yet again not check the upload dates for any of these? Also again, demons are a VERY common trope and they're done so differently on the channels in terms of lore, how is this even one you'd mention as a potential copy at all?!

Next the pizza boys: at the time of Charlie's (Yuurivoices "pizza delivery guy") first apperance in bittersweet (august 9th 2021) Guy's only apperances have been being an unamed voice basically saying "here's your pizza" in one Asher video, one Gavin video and the april fools video.

Like Guy, Charlie was also just meant as a background character at first but compared to Guy at the time actually had only some light references to a pizza place (like his shirt) while he's mainly introduced as and functions as a criminal goon from Alphonse and Seths past. In both cases the fandoms independently asked those two to get their own series/listeners which is not a phenomenon you could copy and as background characters they weren't all that similar, again one being defined by being the pizza delivery guy the other mainly being a criminal goon at first. The pizza thing came back for Charlie in his own series only because the premise of that series is that he's stopping with the crime stuff so it makes sense to go back working at the pizzeria that was lightly referenced in his time as just a side character. Also their similarities pretty much end at their current jobs, their characters and backstories as well as current plots are pretty different past that. In conclusion, i highly, highly doubt any intentional copying, and to summerize they're both happen to be initial background characters that viewers rallied to get their own listeners (something you couldn't intentionally copy and therefore just funny coincidence) that happen to both currently work in pizza delivery (and unlike Guy, "your pizza guy boyfriend", Charlie isn't even called anything related to his job in the thumbnails/titles, it's always things like "your childhood crush" or "soft punk boyfriend" e.t.c.)

Now, last but not least, Aaron and Auron: ok, so Aaron's first video was uploaded january 21st 2021 and only two days later on january 23rd 2021 Yuurivoice and Jackie Eleanor who does the art on the channel do a character reveal art stream on Auron (i'd recommend any Redacted fan who started listening to Yuurivoice only recently and thinks he might be copying Aaron to check out that stream, it's called "YuuriVoice Character Design Stream ft. Jackie Eleanor [Glasses Boy]") and to me it seems clear from how Yuurivoice talks about him (referencing inspiration from Kyoya from the anime Ouran Highschool Host Club for example) and how he had already pitched the character to Jackie so she could already come up with a basic design sketch that he very likely already had thought of and planned this character for longer than literally just two days before this stream (i.e. the upload day of the very first Aaron video)

Now you could choose to believe that Yuurivoice saw the Aaron video on the 21st and then went and did that stream only two days later and talked about the character as if he'd been planning/working on him for longer than that just to idk hide the copying, i guess? But personally that feels like a huge stretch to me.

Interestingly enough another thing Auron and Aaron have in common is a younger brother associated with the color purple and stars (to a degree) but given that Auron and Faust were revealed/comfirmed to be brothers long before the same happend for Aaron and Elliot it would mean that Erik did the copying on those points but i don't believe that's the case either, it's also probably just a weird coincedence.

In summery, they both happen to be dom boss characters (which btw is also a common trope one that neither Erik nor Yuurivoice invented, i mean have you heard of 50 shades of gray? The Secretary?) they happen to have very similar first names and both have a strained relationship with a purple themed younger brother (but again this similarity would actually have to be Erik copying Yuurivoice if it isn't just a coincedence instead)

In conclusion, i believe both sets of similarities are coincedences and i think if you believe the similar name and character trope are intentionally copied then it would be lowkey hypocritical to not also believe that the younger brother parts are also simply too similar to be just coincedence and therefore Erik would have to be copying Yuurivoice right back (which would be a ridicioulous situation)

Another funny thing is that as someone that has been listening to Yuurivoice for much longer than Redacted i almost immediately noticed that they both have a meta and kinda robotic (in Erik's case the voice in Yuurivoice's visual design) character named the exact same thing: Echo. But in this case the first mention of Echo on Yuurivoices channel is the video "YuuriVoice 2.0 Channel Trailer | Patreon & Script Submission Announcement" which was uploaded on March 26th 2020, while Erik uploaded his first ever video on the Redacted channel literally months later in july of the same year, not to mention his first Echo video which would be even later than that. So i actually had the thought before if Erik was inspired by (or, if you wanna be less charitable i guess, copied) Yuurivoice to name his meta channel character Echo as well or if this was just coincidence, especially after Erik literally mentioned having listened to Yuurivoice before he started his channel.

Personally i don't think it matters all that much at the end of the day, though. A name is such a small similarity anyway.

.

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

f1 anon here! yall are so so sweet omg, ill cry rn. my current opinions on it are: i love mclaren and ferrari (what can i say, i love the color red). other than that i really dont even know what im talking abt, i really do just think its so fun to watch. at the end of the day i am a simple create, i like to see fast cars go fast. but please share and ramble abt your favs and your opinions, i would love to hear them!!

hi my love!! i’ve tagged you as 🏁 anon, so you can find all of your posts and responses in one place <3

oh you’re a girly with taste 😌 and that’s what it’s all about!! we like to see fast cars go fast <3

i’m about to ramble your fuckin socks off so be warned mwahahaha

mclaren are my favourite team!! it’s a funny one, because they’re so good to lando and oscar, were so good to carlos, but they treated danny so terribly. they’re definitely my number one team, 100%, but sometimes i do get a little angry when i think about what danny went through in a year there

I like the ferrari drivers - I don’t like ferrari as a team. or at least, I didn’t. fred vasseur (their new team principle) has come in and changed the game, which gives me hope. fuck mattia!! I just think… how are you the most successful team in the history of f1 but right now you have no strategy and no communication and a mess of a car etc etc. like how did we end up here

not huge on red bull as a team, but that’s probably because i’m not massive on checo or horner. but i adore maxie. i feel like we’d get along really well if we ever met. he’s such a complex personality but in the best way, and the most talented driver of his generation.

if I had to make a fave drivers list, it would probably look something like -

lando, maxie, daniel, carlos, charles, alex, oscar

alex mf albon!! he’s so underrated and we do not talk about him enough. he outperforms the car week after week. king shit <3

and lando is my number one, of course. we have a lot in common, and I think we’re pretty similar people. I do think I’d be able to make him laugh until he cried (not that it’s hard). he’s a ridiculously talented driver, which he’s proven again and again. he gets discredited because he’s never won, but it’s just an unfortunate coincidence that his best season coincided with maxies best season too. he’s always learning and experimenting, and other drivers have said that they watch his onboards to look at the lines he’s choosing etc etc, because he’s always pushing the limits. I cannot even describe to you how much I would love to watch him win this season.

and daniel, sweet daniel. he’s so bittersweet to watch, because he really did leave red bull thinking he’d find something better and then never found it. genuinely wouldn’t be surprised if he took checos seat next year. he’s so talented, and he’s been racing for such a long time, so it’d be nice to see him on the podium again soon. he just needs a rocketship of a car!! glad to see him back in a team that cares about him, though. he’s a ray of sunshine <3

I shall not ramble anymore… unless… 😌

anon, tell me your thoughts and faves and opinions, don’t let me talk your ear off anymore!!

[benayoung]

* ❁┆coincidence

nayoung was just in the area.

she didn't really make plans with anyone to go to the christmas market. for some reason, christmas feels too personal to share with other people much. she knows that's the opposite of how it's supposed to be. christmas is the season of giving and spending time with loved ones or whatever, and nayoung will do that with her family, at least, but it's just...

it all reminds her of living in colorado, with the frequent snow and her figure skating career that ended too early and when her parents were still together. she used to love looking at christmas lights with them.

it's not like they're dead, but her mother and father's relationship is rocky at best, and her dad is still back in the states. her mother has somehow grown even colder in more recent years, likely due the continued failure of her modeling career and her youth going down the drain.

nayoung pauses, and stares up at the lights of one of the department stores. it's pretty impressive, considering south korea typically celebrates christmas less than people in the united states do, at least to nayoung's knowledge.

it's nice, though. bittersweet, really. maybe she'd feel better if she shared all of these mixed feelings and holiday with someone else, but she doesn't really have anyone else to trust with that.

she carries on, onto one of the market stalls, this one selling glassblown ornaments, made by a local artist. nayoung has a rather pathetic artificial, mini christmas tree on one of the tables in her apartment. there isn't much room for ornaments, but one of these would be pretty, right?

someone comes up next to her, and nayoung briefly casts a glance their way with intention to return to her business, but the person is familiar: haneul. "oh," she says, more instinctively than anything else. "haneul."

it's a little funny, considering the last time seoul had an event like this, haneul was the one that dragged her out to enjoy it. if nayoung believed in fate or something, maybe she'd think this is a small instance of it. she doesn't really, though, so it's mainly a funny coincidence.

❁┆@behaneul

[fuckyeahisawthat]

While we like to joke about Izzy being in the wrong genre, I would argue that there are in fact at least five distinct genre universes in the world of Our Flag Means Death, and all of them have different rules.

Stede Bonnet, and his crew when they’re around him, live in a Muppet movie. I didn’t come up with this analogy but it’s so accurate. Insane physical comedy and comedy-action where no one really gets hurt. Mild peril but you know everything is gonna work out. Terrible puns and sight gags, but room for sweet, genuine emotional moments too. The rules of time, space, probability and logic will bend for a good joke.

Izzy Hands is in a grimdark action/drama where if someone gets stabbed in the gut they will behave normally and fucking die. (Probably slowly and painfully, of sepsis.) Crucially I think Izzy also lives in a genre where you can only be subtextually queer, and violence (done for or with or to each other) is the only acceptable form of intimacy between men. This is why being forcibly dragged into Stede’s world, where everyone is busy having silly low-stakes misadventures and being gay and emotionally available all over the main text--and seeing his Subtextual Boyfriend go into this world and love it--sends him round the twist.

The British, Spanish and other imperialist militaries are in a Master and Commander-style naval adventure where they’re the heroes. This is why they all take it completely seriously when Stede (unintentionally) kills Badminton and takes hostages, even though we can see that he bumbled his way into it ass-backwards. This is also why Stede is so shocked to get actually for real stabbed aboard the Spanish ship. (“Did you mean to do that?”) He didn’t realize until that moment that he’d stepped into a different genre. The stabbing is one of the first Surprise Genre Switch moments we get and in retrospect it’s very important for setting up that in this world, the threat of getting hurt or killed is very real--which we need to understand to know that there are real stakes much later, when Stede almost gets executed by the British.

Calico Jack is in Jackass. Everything is funny but especially pain--your own or other people’s. Everything’s a joke and nothing means anything and if you get hurt or hurt someone else (physically or emotionally) who cares, fucking laugh it off, cause genuine care and concern is for LOSERS. You can definitely be gay with your pirate bro but don’t even think about calling him your friend. Life is cheap and painful and short and you can’t trust anyone, so why not at least get drunk and have some fun before it’s over. Jack’s world is pretty fucking dark underneath the laughter, and I don’t think it’s a coincidence that we hear some of the most gruesome Blackbeard stories in this episode. It is not really that far from Izzy’s world, in that it’s also a place where violence is the only acceptable form of connection between men; it’s just played as slapstick around Jack. (Side note but I love that the humor in his episode gets progressively more strained, until we’re laughing uncomfortably, then not sure if we should be laughing at all, then convinced that we definitely shouldn’t be because the violence isn’t funny anymore.)

The fifth genre at work, of course, is romance. Ed and Stede follow the story beats of a rom-com almost perfectly, although in tone their romance ranges from comedic to earnest and heartfelt to bittersweet and heartbreaking, all played with complete sincerity in the moment. One of the reasons the ending is so gutting is that Stede has reached the Epiphany stage of a rom-com (the running-to-the-airport moment) while Ed is still stuck in Crisis (it’s over; I’ve gone back to my old life and I’m unhappy, but I haven’t figured out yet that I need to change things and how). And of course the writers had the brilliant-slash-terrible idea to end the season before the resolution stage, leaving us on an emotional cliffhanger and yearning for a continuation of the story. Bastards (affectionate).

Watching the characters navigate the different genres, and the moments of genre confusion that arise when the world we’re in abruptly shifts, is fascinating. While Stede is lodged so firmly in the rom-com genre that he takes it with him when he leaves the ship, Ed is a genre chameleon. He is able to genre code-switch better than any other character, and generally seems to know what genre he’s in at a given moment. 

Underneath his fearsome reputation, we see that Ed is an incredibly lonely and insecure person, and he’s constantly presenting the version of himself that he thinks whoever he’s with wants to see. We see this most dramatically when he instantly shifts into frat boy mode with Calico Jack, but upon rewatch you can see that he is constantly editing himself depending on whether he’s interacting with Izzy or with Stede, presenting slightly different versions of himself that he thinks they will approve of. And I don’t think it’s quite so simple as Ed being his “real” self around Stede and putting on a persona everywhere else, although I do think that there are ways Stede interacts with him that are categorically much healthier than anyone else in his life. But ultimately all of these personas are the real Ed, which is why I tend to think that a big part of season 2 is going to be Ed’s self-actualization arc, deciding which parts of himself he wants to nurture, what can be accepted and integrated, and what maybe needs to be made peace with and let go of.

While the story is definitely a romance in structure (in that the romantic storyline is the main plot on which everything else hangs), and it’s mostly a comedy, tonally it ranges all over the map. There are times when it’s a pretty dark comedy, and there are times when I think it steps out of the comedy genre entirely (particularly, when talking about characters’ past trauma, and in the second half of the final episode). Managing these tone shifts so they’re impactful but not disorienting requires really good writing and acting, and the more you watch the show the more you see all the brilliant little setups that make this work.

[punishing-eden]

Things I Wish I Could Say Out Loud...

¬ Not beta read

Lee x Commandant/Reader

Summary:

There are many things that Lee has documented into his data library. However, lately he has been taking a different method of documentation. This time it's with a voice recorder.

Tags: bittersweet, one-shot, potential spoilers for affection lvl.

"XX of XX, year 21XX, Construct: Lee. Location: Babylonia...... Recording session no. 108 of things I wish I could say out loud..."

*******

It was a small gift from Murray.

Lee took a look at it in his hand.

"What is this for?" the construct asked.

Murray smiled. However, Lee didn't find his own question funny.

"It's something I think you would like. You can record anything you want with it." the man said.

Inspecting the device, the construct only kept a neutral face before replying, "It's not necessary for constructs like me to have these things. My data recording mechanics works just as perfect, if not, it yields 30% more effective than of devices such as these. Output quality, file formating, and sound mixing are all put in consideration when you buy products like this. Constructs have many built in functionality, rendering these thing useless to them..."

Lee's voice faded as he spoke. A dead silence settled between them. The harsh words that Lee put forward didn't seem to hit Murray in anyway, a smile was still kept drawn on his face.

The silence, however, gave Lee an uncomfortable feeling. His synthetic skin mimicked goosebumps. He should say something to ease the silence. That's when he added, "... I don't need this, Murray."

He handed the device to his brother.

Murray shifted and a small laugh escaped his lips.

"I know it's useless, in a technical stand point. But," Murray gently pushed the device back into Lee's hand, "I ought to think that maybe, as useless as it may be, this is exactly what you need."

Lee, after thinking about it, decided to accept the gift out of courtesy. "Very well..." He replied and pocketed the gift.

After receiving the device, Lee gave it a go and tried it out a few times. He didn't like it, and was planning to disassemble the gadget instead.

However, he went against it due to a small talk when he bumped into Murray one day. Who, asked him about the gift, and Lee felt a reluctance to treat the device as it was intented.

He began finding use for the voice recorder. Using it, as a means to record logs or data, however, he found no joy in doing that.

During his weekly frame maintenance check, Lee spotted Asimov, owning the same model of voice recorder on his office desk. In fact there were two.

There was an urge to ask about it, seeing it was a coincidence. Asimov, his look as sour as ever, reply with a sarcastic flare, "One," he held up the left one, "is to document research logs. The other," he held up the right one, "is to collect all my disagreements and complaints against everyone here, hoping that one day I would drop this and have Hassen or someone pick it up and listen to it."

Disputes between departments in the council wasn't unheard of. However, Lee was interested at Asimov's latter use of a voice recorder. It wasn't a bad idea.

Sure, Lee himself has disagreements and verbal fights; especially towards Kamui. But, there were times he restricted his tougne for the sake of his Commandant.

So, when he returned to his quarters, he took the recorder and began to spew his complaints.

*******

"... I dislike the way you always put others before yourself..."

*******

The notification in Lee's system alerted him it was time for a special mission debriefing. The Grey Raven Squard were called in by Celica. Lee left his resting quarters as he headed out to the meeting room. There the rest of his team were waiting for him.

Celica came in last and placed a pile of paperwork on the table. Without hesitation, she began working on the control panel.

Lee noted that this usually means this particular mission is either important or it has a special status in the Babylonia database.

The lights dimmed. Images and information were projected up for everyone to see.

"Operation Underground..." Celica handed out her report file to you, "President Hassen wants the Grey Ravens to be dispatched as soon as possible, " she said.

"After some consideration and thorough analysis, it was concluded an archaic type of memory data is located under this ruin civilisation," the slide show propped up an image of a satelite map, "It was thought, back then, people had been toying about the concept of creating Constructs. Maybe that's why there are so many traces of memory data found there."

"you mean, memory data from the golden age?" you asked.

"Technology -wise yes, but the data... It could be a span ranging way before the golden age. The Science council had send teams to conduct excavation in the ruins, but through out the years corrupted levels are getting higher in that area," Celica said.

"Let me guess, Nikola wants us to investigate the area on the Science Council's behalf?" Lee asked.

"Actually, the main objective isn't to investigate the ruins , more so, President Hassen requested you guys to retrieve an archaic memory data. During the last excavation, the team found a Supercomputer, it was believe it stores the raw data. " she replied.

"but the supercomputers are so old, would the data even been salvageable upon retrieving?" Lucia asked, "As we know, technology back then has a higher probability of crashing and produce incomplete data."

"As long as the data is stored in a super computer, the percentage of data lost during extraction is small, compare to a data chip or a transferring port. Normally, supercomputers have two to four back up drive. If one drive or server courrpts, the other drive will immediately download the data. So extracting straight from a super computer is much safer. But, it's best if data loss can remain below 1.273%." Lee spoke.

Impressed by Lee's analysis, you closed the file and stood up. There was no time to waste in this operation.

"We will look into the details during our descent, Grey Ravens, move out." you ordered and your constructs followed.

As you all walked out of the meeting room, Celica said, "Oh, I almost forgot, this ruin is consider a danger zone, so please do not hesitate to retreat when necessary."

*******

"... I always do my best to serve you, even if my logic and words may make it sound the opposite. Please know, all that I am doing is all for your best interest as well as your future. You have to live, Commandant. At all cost... "

*******

He had been waiting for three hours, twenty four minutes and forty five seconds.

The door in the emergency wards was still closed. Lee could only sit in the waiting seat as his other teams mates were also rushed to the repair room.

He, himself, was considered lucky to have taken minimal damage, in comparison. His arm was ripped off and was given a temporary one for the time being. Although, it was advise to return to the Science department as soon as possible to replenish his vital fluids.

The door automatically slid open and the medical team, along with Asimov came out.

Lee turned his head and waited for the news Asimov had to deliver.

"Calm down, Lee, your Commandant is fine," Asimov huffed, he seems a little exhausted.

"I see, what's the condition?" Lee asked.

"You really need to look out for that Commandant of yours. "Brain damage" might sound a little too harsh, but that's the non techincal diagnosis." Asimov waved his hand, " a much techinal term would be, minor brain scarring."

Lee did not reacted.

"Don't worry about it too much. Your Commandant's condition is consider minor, the situation has been stablize. All that is left to do is to rest and recover."

"May I see Commandant?" Lee questioned.

"..." Asimov heasitated, "... Normally, I don't advise visitation, but, I guess I will let it slide this time." the man narrow his eyes a little.

"... But, I want you out in five minutes, understood?"

*******

"I am doing all this is because..."

*******

"Commandant..." Lee spoke in a small voice. You were asleep on the bed. Monitors and devices all plugged up to you as you slumber in the dimly lit room.

Seeing there was no response emitted from you, Lee spoke once more, "Really, Commandant, why do you have to push yourself again? How many times have you visited the medical bay this month? You know it worries us greatly..." He paused.

He was glad he went against your orders this time. If he hadn't called for Babylonia's retreat plan, you would end up in a much serious condition. Linking with the M. I. N. D beacon for an overwhelming amount of time, is not wise.

For sure, he knew you would get a little annoyed by that, and he played a fake scenario in his head that you were actually awake.

Talking to him, asking him why did he went against your orders, to retreat and not push through. He will agree everyone is close, so close to retrieve the data.

But monitoring the linking time, as well as, asking Liv to scan your physical condition once every 15 minutes. Lee can predict you won't last.

And, his prediction was right, and he should call for retreat much sooner. As soon as you arrived back at the base, you collapse on the floor. You nose bleed as you were rushed to the emergency ward.

His answer would have been the same as of Lucia's and Liv's. To protect your well being is a duty of a construct. However, he wasn't satisfied with that anwser.

There's more he wanted to say.

He knows he's not good with words, often making blunt jabs and spilling out harsh realities. Often times, he felt a little misunderstood because of it.

However, he tries. He really does. And, to be alone with the Commandant, in which, you were in a comatose state, might made it easier for the construct to say something.

Say something that he always wanted to say out loud.

He opened his mouth, lips forming shapes that helps projects words, yet no sound came out from his bionic voice.

He immediately gave up and went out of the emergency ward. That five minutes was over anyway.

*******

"... I want to be with you, be by your side for as long as humanly possible. I don't want to lose you, Commandant... "

*******

After a long break, you peak your head into the Grey Raven's Common room.

There, you saw your constructs resting together as usual. Putting up a big smile you playfully jumped out and reveal yourself at the door.

"I am here!"

"Commandant!" Lucia was surprised and quickly rush towards you Liv followed, happy to see you healthy and well.

As both constructs bombarded you with questions on your well being. Lee only approached and stood with a bit of distance.

"Lee?" you looked at him.

As usual, Palefire wore his signature scowl and crossed his arms, "... I see you are alive and well," he cleared his throat, "Welcome back, Commandant."

"Thank you, Lee."

*******

" Commandant, I...I... Humph..."

**Recording ended**

------------------------------------

Author's note

Hi, I like Lee a lot :)

BTW, the I. T stuff are all based on my limited knowledge of backing up my drawing files. Lol.

©Punishing-eden

[septembersghost]

Question definitely has some real jealousy lmao. I think she listened to leaks first and then listened to HsH and realised how much it changed b/w them.Like there was a time when harry used to blush everytime someone brought her up. I'm surs she has seen the memes of Taylor Swift smile. She used to say he would interrupt her wedding. Maybe a tiny unconscious part of her hoped she would always have that place in his heart. But I think olivia praising harry, them doing RS interview together ,THEM LIVING TOGETHER ,his album etc. made her realise he has completely moved on.So that unconscious part got hurt a bit. So she lashed out(I feel like this word is way too strong) a bit. Telling him I know I am still ur best gf will give her some satisfaction. It's not like he's gonna call her and tell her she's wrong.

i don't know if it's fair to call it direct jealousy so much as it is bittersweetness, like there's a real mix there of some sour annoyance, some...hmm...this word is going to sound way harsher than i mean it, but i can't think of a better one, so - smugness? (in the tone of the "meteor strike," like, i KNOW this had meaning to you), and some fondness/nostalgia ("you painted all my nights a color i've searched for since," and i don't think the illicit affairs of it all sneaked in there, along with the i know places, is a coincidence). "i swear that it was somethin'." even when you're happy and in love and living your own life, i think a tiny part of very normal human nature is hoping someone still might pine for you a little. not enough for it to be disruptive, but on those quiet nights when your thoughts start to circle around (which is exactly what this album is). and the funny thing is, i don't doubt that he does have a place for her in his heart, people carry loves around even after they flame out, especially formative ones. probably part of what was jarring was seeing him in a long-term, suddenly very committed situation, and it's like, well, we never actually got closure here. tbh i think that's a big part of it, the lack of finality. due to the situation with the d*ckhead guy (lmao), they never got to have that conversation she'd like to have had. the construction of the song itself is so interesting, the way it races and loops up and down, like she just had to get that out of her head as fast as possible. they were so, so young at that time too, and when you're already in a tenuous situation and you've got all this insane outside pressure and then you keep not being able to figure things out properly, the ability to have that measured, honest conversation slips away. there's a sense of release in it almost, especially near the end, where the answer doesn't matter. she threw it out into the universe in a condensed, hypothetical form because that was the only way it could ever be asked.