#jondere

[sparky-is-spiders]

Ok consider: Jon having gender envy for Elias. He has no especially strong feelings re: gender until he claps eyes on the most boring man alive and suddenly he needs to be that. Elias has specific opinions on which briefcase brand is the most reliable and Jon wishes he could be that kind of person so badly. Jon tries multiple times to "subtly" inquire as to where Elias gets his slacks. Jon wants to steal Elias' gender so badly. And he would never fucking express it and if he ever did he would be ruthlessly mocked for it.

[suspiciousasphalt]

first post here 🤪

jongerry wip

i’ll probably post on ao3 once i’ve got more written.

There’s something wrong.

They can tell as soon as they wake up.

The blanket over them is too thick, thicker than any that they own and musty with disuse. They open their eyes slowly, taking stock of their surroundings. There is a coffee table in front of them. (Are they on a couch?) The table is clean, except for several stains, tea maybe? Or coffee? Their eyes flick up and they jump back, shoving into the back of the couch.

“AHhhh” Whoever is in front of them also jumps back a bit, tripping on the coffee table, and stumbling to catch his balance. “Ah, um, sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you. I-I’m Jon.”

“Right, and where am I?”

“Uh, the breakroom? The Archives breakroom? In the Magnus Institute, that is. I, uh, I was leaving for the day, and I saw you in here?��� Right- Gerry remembers, now. Gertrude had them hunting down a Leitner. Except it hadn’t just been a Leitner, whoever came across it had it for too long, and had fully Become by then. It was so far gone that it’d begun growing patchy fur, and its ears were sharp. Gerry’d spent hours running through London, weaving through alleyways until they'd finally gotten a jump on it. Gertrude demanded an update, and as soon as they finished, they crashed on the break room couch.

“And who are you?”

“Right, Gerard, they/them for now. I… freelance, for Gertrude.” Gerry popped their neck, and watched Jon. Instead of the usual confusion that they’d come to expect from the stuffy academic types that seemed drawn to the Magnus Institute, Jon just nodded and stuck out his hand.

“Jonathan Sims, he/they. Just call me Jon, though.” Gerry smirked in amusement.

“Well Jon, nice to meet you, but I doubt I’ll be seeing you with enough frequency to call you anything.” Jon sputters a bit, and grows red in the face (In a way that is totally not cute, shut up brain) and occurs to Gerry that maybe that was a bit rude. “Sorry, I didn’t mean anything by that. I just don't tend to stick around the Institute longer than I have to.”

Jon just raises an eyebrow and looks at Gerry's current tangled-in-a-blanket state. Now it’s Gerry’s turn to blush.

“Well, usually. In my defense, it’s been a long bloody day, and I needed to crash.” Jon looks curious at that, but decides not to ask. A wise decision- Jon would get no answers from them. “Anyway, I better be off.”

Gerry gets up and pulls on their jacket, but pauses when they see the clock.

“Wait, why are you just leaving? It’s like 7:00? And what are you doing in the archives? Nobody ever really comes down here.”

“You’re down here.” Ah so Jon’s a prickly one. Gerry just gives him a Look, and Jon blushes again.

“Mr. Bouchard told me that I’m transferring to the Archives tomorrow, as an assistant. And that was at 5:00, and then I tried to finish up my work so no one in research would be stuck with what I didn’t get done. Then I was about to leave and realized I should probably go meet my new boss… So then I came down here and Gertrude just glared at me a bit before stomping off upstairs. I waited around for a bit, because I thought it might be rude if she came back down like only a few minutes later and I was already gone? But it doesn’t seem like she’s coming back anytime soon. And then I, ah saw you in here? And I didn’t think anybody else was down here, um, ever? So I just came in to look, and now we’re… here?”

Okay, so the rambling is a bit cute, and Gerry has half a mind to be amused, but there are more pressing concerns.

“Sorry, did you just say you’re going to be an archival assistant?”

“Um, yes?”

“Have you signed any papers yet?” Gerry’s properly concerned now, and Jon seems to be getting agitated.

“Yes? I signed the transfer papers?”

“Damn, Gertrude’s not going to be happy with that.”

“Excuse you, what’s that supposed to mean?”

“Oh Gertrude has been absolutely refusing to get new assistants for years. I would have thought Elias would have wanted to avoid pissing her off. No wonder she hasn’t been back yet. She’s probably ripping him a new one” Jon visibly bristles.

“Well excuse me, but I hardly see how having an assistant would be a bad thing. I mean, if the state of this place is anything to go by, then she certainly needs one.”

“Oh try telling her that. Or don’t,” Gerry gives a cynical snort, “she’s going to be right pissed no matter what anyone says.”

“Whatever,” Jon scoffs, “Too late now. She’ll either have to deal with me or take it up with Mr. Bouchard.”

“Oh I imagine she is.”

It isn’t until Jon is storming away, and stomping up the stairs that Gerry realizes that they were probably being rude.

“Well Shit”

[see-arcane]

I have been possessed by a stronger than average craving for tinkering with Jonathan Harker's genders (Jonders). Jonathan Harker is undeniably and forever my favorite gothic heroine. But, being that there is so much to chew on regarding his potential fluidity when it comes to gender roles within the story--the classic damsel, the willingly submissive half of the couple, the vengeful berserker, etc--it's got me thinking.

Let's take the metaphor out. What would happen to the Dracula narrative if Jonathan Harker was...

First thing's first--she almost definitely gets shouldered out of the Important Solicitor's position due to reasons of Being Girl. But she still has to get to Transylvania to be menaced by Count Bat Bastard. How?

Hawkins! Johanna is working at the firm as a secretary and personal assistant to a still very paternally mushy old Peter Hawkins. When Dracula's request comes around, he can't give up such a lucrative client over his gout and there's no one he trusts to pass it to. He has to go. And it'd only be right to treat his surrogate daughter to a paid scenic vacation have his aide along on the business trip. Especially when she hunted down Carfax Abbey herself! What a lovely outing they'll have.

...or not.

True to form, Count Dracula is very much not to be trusted around pretty young things of any kind. Considering his canon habits, things aren't about to go any easier for Miss Harker. But at least she has Hawkins watching out for her in-person! It all makes for some very tense talk when discussing anything other than the estate purchase; which Hawkins seems as keen to rush as Dracula is to dawdle over. But at least they'll be out of here soon. What's a couple of awkward nights, right?

One in particular has Johanna nervous as she goes to bed. Hawkins had taken Dracula aside with a hard smile, insisting there was a 'delicate matter' he wished to speak with the Count about. The last time a 'delicate matter' was brought up was when he nearly lobbed a typewriter at one of his ex-solicitor's heads for some distinctly unseemly behavior in her direction. She hopes there isn't a storm brewing under their host's roof. She hopes harder that tomorrow they'll be heading back to the Borgo Pass.

Instead:

Oh.

Oh no.

Between this and one requisite nightmare-week in which the joys of womanhood come and go--let's leave it unspoken whether her set of bloodstained cloths stay in her possession or not--Johanna gets put through the wringer. Per usual. But eventually..!

Yeah. No shock there. Deep calming breaths, Jack. Don't let the wonderful diary concuss you.

Part of being one of two (gasp) G I R L S in the Scooby Gang, Van Helsing and company vote Johanna and Mina out of the dirt hunt. Except. Well. Johanna is still necessary to have on the ground here. She's the only one with the location intel--and a surprise willed gift of inheritance and the firm from poor Hawkins, who the Transylvanian locals all vouch for as being 'slain by wolves,' leaving Johanna free of blame--so she's still running around for the crew.

Even so, odds are high that she initially gets sidelined with Mina. Which isn't overly awful. It is good to be side-by-side in this timeline! No needless sequestering from each other! Johanna is already planning to see Mina back to their new house before they have to sleep another night in an asylum.

And then comes the 3rd of October.

Van Helsing: "Madam Harker, is it not somewhat attention-catching to wear trousers in public? We are meant to be unremarkable while we wait on th--"

Johanna, has already smoked through two cigars, kukri in her lap, playing a game of chicken with God: "Do you think I scaled a mountain in three layers of skirts, Professor? No? Then I will not do the same if the rancid bastard tries to escape out the window."

Van Helsing, aside: "Friend John, can you speak sense to her?"

Jack, melting off the side of the bench: "I think I hauve consumption"

Anyway. She very much does get to the Dracula head chopping. And there will be much rejoicing. BUT all that grimdarkness aside, there are other, more hijinks-flavored opportunities to think of with this particular set up. If only because I genuinely believe that Lucy and Art, having two spare best friends on hand and a general vibe that radiates 'ooooh what if triple wedding???', would come up with the following master plan. Some truly Shakespearean folly kind of shit:

Thankfully, Johanna and Mina nix the idea pretty quick. Case in point:

And, last but not least, my final word on the range of Jonders that exist within my very best gothic heroine friend:

ha ha I do that

[revs-batverse]

jonder crisis

[ao3feed-jonmartin]

Jonder Dysphoria

read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/ymTapG4 by Ineffable_Ezra Words: 232, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Fandoms: The Magnus Archives (Podcast) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: M/M Characters: Martin Blackwood, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist Additional Tags: Trans Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Set in Episodes 159-160 | Scottish Safehouse Period (The Magnus Archives), Asexual Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, If You Squint - Freeform, Gender Dysphoria read it on AO3 at https://ift.tt/ymTapG4

[faultyvessel]

Don’t mind me just Jondering the horrors

[castielsprostate]

ponder my jinfinite jorb......

oh my god i am JONDERING THE JINFINITE JORB. I have been BLESSED. BY THE JORB.

[atewell-blog]

Here is a list of a few “Dere” types for Valentine’s Day! Make sure you know what type of love you are getting into. ;)

[sparky-is-spiders]

More thinking about the Jonder (Jon Gender). I imagine Jon discovering it/its pronouns and just being Drawn to them. Jon meets somebody who goes by it/its and can’t stop thinking about it (pun intented) but can never work up the courage to admit it even to themselves so they use they/them in their head or with close friends (read: Georgie) and he/him everywhere else. By the time Jon is ready to use it/its for itself it’s already at the Magnus Institute, a place where they feel a constant need to come off as Professionally As Possible and nobody ELSE is using Neopronouns (for the same reasons as Jon, although it doesn’t know that) and is it even safe to be out as any shade of queer at all so it continues with business as usual pronoun-wise. And then it discovers that it’s turning into an eldritch inhuman monster and its gender feelings get 5000% more complicated.

[suspiciousasphalt]

I published my jon/gerry/tim wip! I’ve only posted chapter one so far but i do have the beginning of chapter 2!

[ghost-light]

I ADORE YOUR NAMES AND URL AND THEME ACTUALLY. HELLOOOOOO ily banana <333

<3333 HELLLOO ILY PLUTO TYSM

[gerrydelano]

are you still going to do a love letter, alive type thing for jon and melanie?

actually, i don’t think i will? their backstory/identity stuff is more something i’m getting used to incorporating into bigger stories to the point where i don’t really know what i’d do for that that isn’t Repetitive, and i'm also gonna be focused too much on PBR to really be interested or motivated. the georgie fic helped me to establish some lore i’d end up using in other things, but i don’t really see the other two as being quite necessary in a Series for it? if anything i’d do just melanie, but even then i’m not sure i’ll get around to it.

[moonwitted]

He's got looks that books take a page to tell

He's got a face that makes you run for your life

With his Money In The Bank contract in his hand

You would think he's doing alright

But

Like a baby or a stubborn child

He’s still angry

Always looking for someone to fight

Always angry

While you ask if God’s abandoned man,

He’s yelling “you gonna CATCH THESE HANDS”

[radiosandrecordings]

Any thoughts on Jonder you'd like to share? I'm stuck at work and bored an Jon gender meta sounds good.

I was also stuck at work when I got this, apologies! Hmm, trying to think of stuff I haven't already said.

I think one of the reasons Jon just generally prefers masculine fashion, even when not caring about gender connotations, is that it's just generally Easier? He doesn't like makeup because That Takes Ages and That's Expensive and Why Would I Want Paste On My Face, Sensory Bad, and dresses and skirts have always just struck him as the kind of thing you have to be too conscious of when wearing, and why are all these clothes tight or just generally uncomfortable?

He does like putting an effort into his presentation though, he just prefers to do that in a more "I look like a university professor from a 90's movie" way. He dressed more chill in research, but when he gets promoted he goes full tweed jackets and oxfords for the first few weeks, and yes, I AM a Jon earth palette colourscheme truther. I think having that level of control, where he looks put together just by putting those clothes that have an association with being clever and organised and running a comb through his hair, helps his mentality a lot in S1 where he's afraid, but desperately trying to pretend that he isn't, and also that he's competent at his job as a regular, non-spooky thing. He does paint his nails occasionally though, usually in just very neutral colours, and even if he has to go do something where he's worried it will be considered "unprofessional" he'll just put a clear coat on. It becomes somewhat of a ritual in season four to keep them neat, and he always fixes them as soon as he can when they chip, though sometimes Daisy helps if his hands are shaking too much.

Okay that went more into fashion than gender specifically, but I hope your work day goes well! Or went well if you're already out

[thedeboniardevistation]

I appreciate all the “Jinder” chants

[wolf-and-bard]

heelloo Jonderful. How about some somft Eskel? How about Eskel tries ice cream for the first time, or like, snow cone with flavour? And him having a brainfreeze?

My darling Panda-randa. This is less soft and more... Lambskel shenanigans. I hope you like it anyway 🥰 Thank you my darling @natskier for beta-reading 💕

---

Eskel scowls at the little metal bowl Lambert hands him as he emerges from the small bakery. They’re on a long-winded job on Spiekeroog and it’s been hot out for a change. So hot, in fact, that Lambert suggested they take the day off and do something fun.

“No use hunting an ice giant when it’s going to melt before we can take the trophy off it anyway,“ Lambert said and forewent his armoured jacket in favour of a simple linen shirt. Eskel… Eskel copied him. Lambert is the pricklier, more annoying of them, but he’s also the one better equipped to deal with a heat wave. He blooms in the sun, cowers in the cold. Eskel is the opposite, which is why he prefers the wolves’ Northern hunting grounds where summer hardly ever reigns freely.

He sighs and watches as Lambert takes a scoop of whatever it is that he’s handed Eskel.

It’s ice, somehow, shavings of ice over which something blue has been poured. It smells sickly sweet, like coloured, liquid sugar. Eskel picks up the spoon and takes one tentative bite.

It’s cool, soothing to his overheated face and the syrup tastes pleasant, not too honeyed, not too bland either. Eskel hums his amazement and his stomach rumbles slightly so he just downs the whole thing in one big swallow.

A minute later, he realizes this was a huge mistake.

“What?” Lambert asks, raising a brow. “What, don’t you like it?”

“Hnnnn,” is all Eskel can get out and he lets go of the bowl which clatters to the ground. Then, he grabs his own head and presses his palms to his temples. “Hhhhnnnn.”

“What is going on with you?”

Eskel closes his eyes. His brain feels like it has fucking frozen solid. It’s throbbing and cold and it’s the most uncomfortable sensation he ever felt. Which is wild coming from someone who once spent a whole fight with a leshen vine down his windpipe.

“Oh, I get it,” Lambert cackles and sucks on his spoon again, relishing the ice. There’s a bit of blue syrup smeared in the corner of his mouth and Eskel thinks he looks so stupid. Also, Eskel is going to die. “You ate it too fast, didn’t you? Rookie mistake.”

“Fuck off,” Eskel groans. He squeezes his eyes shut for a long minute until the uncomfortable pain fades just enough that he can glare at Lambert. To his surprise, Lambert’s wearing a crooked smile and his eyes sparkle.

“I did it, too, the first seven or eight times around.”

“Idiot,” Eskel grumbles. “Could have warned me.”

“Would you believe me if I said that I forgot?” Lambert happily swallows the rest of his portion, gives a contented sigh, then stoops to pick up Eskel’s discarded bowl. When he straightens again, Eskel’s feeling on the right side of fine again. He reaches out with his thumb and wipes the stain from the corner of Lambert’s mouth. Holding Lambert’s gaze, he slowly licks away the syrup.

“No.”

“Uh… don’t do that again,” Lambert mutters, cheeks red, eyes narrowed.

Eskel grins and watches, self-satisfied, as Lambert returns the metal bowls to the shop-owner. Maybe he has to try this again, if only to make Lambert flustered.