#john deserves this 😆

[johnwickb1tsch]

The Girl Next Door ~ 2

A Constantine x Reader fic based on this imagine. Part 1

Summary: John Constantine has a crush on you. He wasn’t going to do anything about it though, until you strong arm him into coming over for dinner. Little do you know, this paints a target on your back for the local vampire coven… Rating: Explicit, NSFW, but no dead doves...😮 Note: I got Constantine on my brain, y'all! 😆 I write about vampire hunters all the time, but never from the vampire perspective. This was new. I hope you enjoy!🧡

2. whoever drinks my blood has eternal life

In the end, he was too late.

Oh, he killed them all, wiping out the entire coven with his magical holy shotgun, and a handy spell that basically burned the remaining undead to a crisp around you.

But you were already half dead, drained and forced to drink their blood in kind.

You were well on your way to becoming one of the Damned.

John knew this, as he cradled your cold body in his arms, carrying you like a bride to the cab outside the warehouse. He knew it as he held you close in the backseat, reciting ancient prayers over your fevered brow, hoping just this once God might grant him a good miracle, and not forsake one of his children just because of an unlucky twist of fate.

Your only crime, as far as he knew, had been extending the mercy of your kindness towards him, and that should not have earned you this.

He barely thanked Chas for a job well done, carrying you bridal style up the stairs of your apartment building. Rather than return you to your bed, he brings you to his. He doesn’t know if the vampire who you must have inadvertently invited into your home died that night, and all his holy weapons are at hand in his own space.

He lays you down in his bed, wishing he’d washed his sheets more recently for you. He wishes a lot of things, in the interim hours that follow.

He can tell that his incantations are not touching the dark magic that is taking hold of you, and he knows that he should just put an end to it here and now. You are damned, and there’s no going back, and who knows what chaos you will reap with your new thirst when you wake?

He can’t bring himself to do it.

Looking down at you, huddled in a ball, trembling as your body is dying and remaking itself anew—he falls to his knees to talk to God, though his words aren’t exactly a prayer. “Our father, who art in heaven…fuck you. I hope you're happy, asshole. Another innocent who you should have protected, fucked over by your stupid games. Why? Why is it always the good ones? I hate you. Amen.”

He takes your hand in his, and only because you are practically unconscious in the fever-pitch of your transformation, does he let his eyes fill with silent tears.

One more soul he was too late to save.

One more weight upon his conscience.

He cries for you. For himself. For the impossible odds God and the Devil pit against humans, then punish them when they're just not up to the task. Flesh is weak, but They made you this way. None of it is fair.

Constantine has never actually been present at a Turning. He doesn’t know how long it will take, or how you’ll act when you come out of it. He has crosses and holy water to keep you in line if he has to…or maybe you’ll rip out his throat, and he will absolutely deserve it after what he let happen to you.

He wonders how the vampires knew about you. Did they watch through the window from some impossible perch, as you made love? Maybe he would never admit it out loud, but that was what that merciful night together had felt like, with you.

This was a hell of a reminder, as to why he couldn’t ever let anyone get close.

It never ended well.

Fully clothed, shoes and all, he spoons your smaller body with his arm around your waist, and waits.

***

When at last you wake, the first thing you are aware of is a heartbeat, right next to you. Behind you. Pressed against you. You hear it like a drum, thundering in your ears. There is a grinding pain in your belly. You are so hungry.

You do not recognize your surroundings, or the bed you lay in. A heavy arm is draped over your waist. You study the large hand upon the sheets, long fingered, veiny. Maybe you know that hand.

Slowly you turn, to find John Constantine beside you. He looks up at your through hooded dark eyes. He was dozing, but no longer.

“Y/n?”

You take a deep breath, and the smells that hit you: his aftershave, sweat, deodorant, dirty sheets, scotch whisky in the kitchen. Old Chinese food. But most of all, you can smell his blood, and it is the sweetest thing you’ve ever smelled.

You lean towards him, mouth open, hands reaching.

You don’t know that your incisors have lengthened to deadly little points.

Casually, John holds up a little crucifix between you. You feel it like a hand pressing back against you, and instinctively you flinch.

What is going on with you?

“John?”

You feel something long brush your lip, and you reach up to touch your teeth, finding the sharp points. Your eyes go half-dollar round as you nearly cut yourself with the tip of one.

“What happened to me?”

He sighs, and there is so much weight and sorrow in that one exhalation of air.

“I’m sorry, y/n.”

“John?” The panic in your voice starts to rise.

“Shh. Don’t get excited. It won’t be good.”

A rampaging new vampire was the last thing he needed on his hands.

“Those things took me,” you whisper, your hand covering your mouth. You start to remember what happened, those creeps who snatched you from your apartment, the impossible things you saw. They were monsters. Vampires. Things you only thought existed in folklore, books, bad B movies. And they’d told you a little about John Constantine too. That he was some sort of demon hunter, crazy as that fucking sounded, who clearly they wished to do harm to.

“Yeah.” 

“They took me,” you repeat with emphasis, still trying to understand.  

A longer pause, pregnant with lots of words you sense he doesn’t quite know how to say.

Again, he settles for, “Yeah.” 

“Why?” 

“I guess…they thought that you mean something to me.” 

After everything that happened, this hits you like a knife between the ribs, a long sharp blade aimed right for your heart.

“Do I not?” 

“Come on, I didn't mean it like that.” 

Yes he did, and you realize... that maybe he's just like all the others. 

At least he'd warned you. 

You just...had hoped, anyway, like the stupid little romantic you are. 

You look down, unable to meet his eyes. 

You kind of want to cry, but you're not even sure you can anymore. 

“I came for you as soon as I knew,” he says quietly, not liking this at all.

You nod, your lip quivering.

“What's going to happen to me?” 

The haunted way he looks at you rends your heart in two.

“We'll…figure it out.” 

“I'm hungry...I think.”

He nods gravely. 

“I was afraid of that.”

“What am I going to do?” 

“I'll...try to help you.”

Your eyes go to his throat again. The thought should be gross, but...you just feel hunger pangs, instead—and a confusing wave of desire.

He notices the focus of your attention, and looks uneasy about it. Your eyes have started to glow.

“Why don't we start with the wrist?” he deadpans, not enthused about your untried razor-sharp fangs in his throat.

You nod shakily, tears in your eyes. “I'm sorry,” you say. 

There's a flicker in John's soulful brown eyes, and though he says nothing, you feel his guilt as though it's your own. You feel it crawling over your skin, and it scares you. 

What is happening to you? 

“Come on,” he says gruffly. “Let's get this over with.” 

You've seen the movies, and you’re not a total idiot. But the thought of actually...biting him? And drinking his blood? It freaks you out, ok, even if every cell in your body is singing out for you to swallow him down. The smell of him. You'd thought it was intoxicating before. Aftershave, spice, and cigarette smoke. The smoke was good only because it ticked some deep buried memory box in your subconscious. But now...it’s like you can sense the strength of his very soul, in the smell of his blood, and you know he will nourish you. 

These thoughts come to you unbidden, and you don't even really know what they mean. Just... that they are unequivocally true.

You take his wrist, the blue veins there seeming to dance for your new improved vampire vision, as though you can see the blood pumping within them.

This is so fucking weird.

“You’re going to be really strong now,” he cautions you. Then, the corner of his mouth ticks. “So be gentle with me.”

Your eyebrows raise at the thought that you could actually hurt him. This big, strong man who threw you around not so long ago like you were just a doll. You’d loved that, truth be told. The memory is so sweet that it almost makes you want to cry again.

“I don’t know if I can do this.”

“You should do it now,” he says. “Because you’re just going to get hungrier, and young vampires when they’re hungry are at their most dangerous. I’d hate to have to—”

He cuts himself off before finishing that thought. Your eyes drift to his nightstand, the holy water, crucifixes, and a broom handle piece that has been sharpened into a nice neat stake. Just in case he has to shove it through your heart.

“Could you do that to me?” you ask quietly before you can stop yourself, still staring at the stake.

“I don’t want to find out,” he deflects. “So come on. Pull up your big girl panties.”

You glare at him, taking his wrist again. “I think I have a right to be freaked out about this.”

“Sure, but it is what it is,” he fires back unkindly. “You’re a vampire now. You have to drink blood to survive, and you’re Damned. Welcome to the club.”

You frown at him, your eyes flashing dangerously. You notice him tense, his attention flicking over to the stake on the bedside.

“You’re afraid of me now,” you marvel. 

“A little, yeah.”

“And I should be afraid of you? They told me what you are.”

“Let’s agree to have a healthy respect of one another, alright?”

You sit quietly, contemplating him. With his wrist in your grasp you can feel the thump thump of his pulse through your entire body, like bumping bass out of a speaker. It is distracting, and as you think about what you must do a warmth rises in you, a tingling rush of power that spreads from your fingers into his arm. It makes him shudder, his pupils suddenly blown wide with desire.

This feels good. Better than the fear, although you’re ashamed to admit, that had been delicious too.

You don’t know how you’re doing any of this. It’s just happening, and you let your new instinct take you, straddling his narrow hips to find his burgeoning erection straining against his slacks. You are still wearing the sundress those creatures took you in, and nothing but the thin cotton of your panties barricades the space between you and him.

He is so handsome, and strong. His blood smells so strong, and it fills you with an aching desire, wetness flooding between your legs. Suddenly the desire to bite him while he is inside you grips you like an iron fist, some ancient knowledge of arcane pleasure pulsing through your veins. You blink, the urge receding only slightly, and you do not know it but your eyes glow like coals. It’s strange, how your body feels cold, except where your skin is touching his. Your points of contact are almost searing, in comparison.

“Y/n…”

“What?” you taunt him. “You don’t want me now that I’m a monster?”

You can still hardly believe this is really happening to you.

“I think you can feel that’s not the case.”

Again, you sense his fear, cloyingly sweet upon your tongue. You like it, and that is the thing that brings you back to yourself. Wanting anyone to be afraid of you is so opposite your true nature that it shocks you.

“Fuck. I’m sorry,” you apologize again, squeezing your eyes closed.

“It’s alright,” he says in that deep voice of his.

It’s not. It’s really not.

“Just…can we get this over with, please?”

“Jesus Christ.”

“He’s not going to help you now, believe me. Just…go slow, ok? Don’t bite me too hard. I need use of my hand still, if you don’t mind.”

You let out a shuddering breath. It feels weird, and you realize…you don’t need to breathe? Taking in air is a reflex, but there’s no effect of your body processing oxygen.

Jesus fucking Christ.

“Okay. I’m going to do it.”

“Any day now.”

“Shut up.”

This is the thing that actually makes him smile, that slight curl of lips that is like a full-on grin for most people. Maybe it’s stupid—but it gives you courage.

You graze his skin with your new sharp teeth, and like a beachcomber searching for treasure with a metal detector, you just sense the sweet spot. You move as carefully as you can, pressing down into his flesh to make two neat little holes.

The spill of blood is divine, and you don’t have time to think that it’s gross. It fills your mouth and it is good, and you are so hungry, and you can’t get enough. The magic in this bloodletting rises like a tide, desire crashing over the both of you in a tingling, intoxicating rush. You feel everything, and there is no extricating the sexual pleasure from the gustatory. They are one and the same with this man, his delicious, powerful blood filling your mouth, his strapping body beneath yours, his hips bucking against you.

You feel his hand slide up your thigh, his thumb seeking the molten center of you. When he makes himself stop just short of your panty line you whine in protest, straining for his touch, but he resists your goading, his fingertips digging into your soft flesh. Perhaps you should be grateful, that he is strong enough to resist the pull of this magic between you, trying not to debauch you while you feed for the first time and everything is new and you have no idea what is happening. And yet, you can hardly think past how wonderful it would be to have his teeming erection buried inside you to the hilt while you drink him down.

You would tell him all this, but you can’t bring yourself to separate your mouth from the font of his delectable lifeblood. In fact, you don’t know how you’re going to stop, period.

It’s just so good.

John watches you through heavy lidded eyes, seemingly enjoying this as much as you are. Yet he has more sense of the situation as well, and when he tells you, “That’s enough, y/n,” an inhuman keening of protest escapes from deep in your throat.

“Y/n…” he warns again, his words thick with desire. “You have to stop.”

You close your eyes, telling yourself just one last mouthful.

That was two long sucking draughts ago.

Suddenly you feel a searing heat very near your face. Startled, your eyes fly open to find the crucifix there before you, and you hiss in answer, scrabbling back on the bed away from the holy item. With John Constantine’s blood on your lips you cower, shielding your eyes with a hand.

With a shuddering sigh he lowers the cross, sitting back against the headboard of his bed. He presses a tissue against his wrist, and your eyes are drawn to the crimson stains flowering on the wad of paper beneath his fingers.

What a waste, you think, before shaking the thought away.

Then the horror of what could have happened dawns on you.

You could have drank him dry, and in the heat of the moment you would have done it gladly.

Oh God. What have you become?

“I’m sorry,” you apologize again. “Are you ok?”

He actually has the gall to smirk at you, as though any of this could be funny. “Yeah. Not the first time I’ve lost a little blood.”

There’s some inside joke in that statement you don’t understand, though you sense the darkness of self-deprecation in it.

Somehow, you feel simultaneously sated, and horrible. With a whimper you curl up at the foot of his bed, closing your eyes against the world. You can feel everything. You sense the people in the building, the fragile sound of their juicy little hearts beating. Even outside, the life on the street, men and women going about their lives with no idea what lurks in the shadows, wanting to eat them up…

But most distracting of all, the sheets beneath you smell like John, and the lust in your blood has yet to abate, even if the feeding is over. You feel it marching across your skin like red-hot ants. The desire to crawl up the bed and press your bloody lips to his is real, and you fight it with everything you have, because you don’t imagine he’d appreciate that very much after what he’s done for you. The sour expression on his face did not match the size of the tent in his pants, that is for sure.  

You wonder, is it going to be like this every time you eat from now on? The thought does not thrill you.

“Hey,” he goads softly, and your eyes fly open to regard him. Again, your irises shine like lanterns, fueled by the roil of emotions warring in your heart. “Come here.” He holds out one of those beautiful hands to you. Hands that you had so relished upon your body, on your flesh, in your hair…hands with such thick, beautiful blue veins…

You’re not sure how he knows that you want to be held, but now you fear it too. You fear what you are, and your ability to control yourself around him. Because the truth is you still want him very much, and he’d basically told you point blank that you mean nothing to him. The thought weighs on your heart now like a thousand stinging needles, and you feel your eyes fill with moisture of some kind.

So, vampires can cry after all.

You touch a finger to the corner of your eye, and see it comes away tinted red.

You kind of want to throw up.

“Maybe…I should go,” you say sadly, sitting up. You’re certain you look as disheveled as you feel. Your hair is a bird’s nest. Your once pretty floral sundress is dirty and torn. No wonder he doesn’t want you.

“If…you want.” Why does he sound sad about it? Shouldn’t he be glad to see the backside of you? Constantine the Demon Hunter? If you’d been nothing but a one-night fuck as a human, he certainly didn’t want to spend time with you now.

 “You know you’re going to need a dark place to rest for the day?”

Is he actually worried about where you’re going to sleep?

“Okay.” You think you can manage that, in your apartment next door. Or maybe…you’ll see what happens, if you watch the sun rise. Maybe it would just be better that way. Are vampire suicides double damned? You’ve never really been a religious person, but he’d said it like it was A Thing.

It reminds you of what John had said earlier. “What did you mean before? When you said join the club?”

He sighs, reaching for a pack of cigarettes on the night stand. “I’ll tell you some other time.”

Feeling like you’ve now been dismissed, you slide from the bed, standing on bare feet. You should be sore, but your movements are lithe, liquid as a cat’s.

Something else to get used to.

You can feel Constantine’s eyes glued to you, and you dare to take one last look back, waiting to turn to a pillar of salt. He’s so handsome it hurts, even in his rumpled state, his cuffs rolled up his forearms and his tie loose around his neck. How do his soulful dark eyes seem to hold all the sorrow of the world right now?

“Bye, John.”

He just nods, and you let yourself out.

***

Much to your surprise, ten minutes before dawn, you hear a knock on your door. You know it's John. You can tell by the sound of his breathing, the sound of his heart beat. You can smell him, and it is a heady thing in your nostrils. When you do not answer he just lets himself in, the cheeky bastard. 

He finds you sitting in one of your thrift store chairs by the window, one of the only ones not broken in the mess the vampires who took you left behind. He does not like this, you can tell, by his hairline frown. 

“Hey.” 

“Hi.”

“Hate to tell you, but you're going to have to find a new way to get your vitamin D.”

“Ha ha,” you say, turning back to the window. A few people are out and about below. This city never really sleeps. 

“Hey,” he says again, crouching down by your chair. “I know this is a lot...”

The look you pay him is not exactly kind. He plows forward anyway.

“But take it from someone who's been there. Hell isn't a place you should be in a hurry to go.” 

You blink at that. He says it like it's so black and white, not a hint of uncertainty. Not faith. Fact. Once upon a time, you might have questioned his sanity. Not anymore. 

“Sounds like you've been.” 

“For about two minutes. It was enough.” 

“What was it like?” you whisper. 

“Pure agony.” 

Your eyes go wide at hearing that. 

“So...want to show me your bolt hole?” he asks.

Once upon a time you would have capitalized on the opportunity for inuendo with such comedic gold just handed to you for free, but you’re not in the mood. You just stare at him.

“John...You're a demon hunter. Why do you care?”

He tries to meet your eyes, but in the end can only look away. “Come on, y/n. Just…don’t give up yet, ok?”

He just feels guilty, you tell yourself, and you pry yourself from your chair with a sigh. You’re not sure what the point of anything will be, anymore. But maybe you’ll make an effort to go on, because he asked you to.

Sometimes, that’s all it takes.

“Fine.”

You figure the closet will be the darkest place in the apartment for you to hide.

[nightingale2004]

DEAREST GENTLE READERS!

I'm so excited for Benedicts season that I can literally hear the tea kettle screeching. I CAN'T WAIT FOR THE DRAMA!

But first, there are some things I wish to discuss and acknowledge with the fandom.

First off....

WTF WERE SOME OF YOU THINKING OF SHIPPING BENEDICT AND CRESSIDA TOGETHER?!?!?!?! JUST WHY?!?!

I get that Cressida was just misunderstood, came from a bad home environment, hasn't gotten a man due to them being stolen, and was taken by her aunt, but seriously?! THIS DOES NOT EXCUSE HOW SHE ACTED WITH PENELOPE AND HOW ROTTEN SHE WAS THROUGOUT THE SERIES TO LITERALLY MOST OF THE BRIDGERTONS!!!!!

I will admit that Cressida does deserve happiness and an actual life with someone who can love and tolerate her. BUT BENEDICT IS OFF LIMITS! HE BELONGS TO SOFIE AND THAT IS THAT!!

Maybe if Sofie was Cressida's cousin or something, then all will be well. But BENEDICT and Cressida are A BIG AND HUMOUNGOUS NO NO!

Benedict deserves Sofie, and Cressida deserves someone who isn't a Bridgerton. Thank you very much

Also, while we're on the subject of Cressida, I kind of wished that she got paid by Penelope, then ran off to Europe and met with that guy Lord Debling (I think that's his name). I hope I'm not the only one who saw the little signs of potential there. I swear I thought I saw Cressida's walls come down around Lord Debling for a strong second. I hope it's not just me.

Moving on.

I really hope that Netflix, while working on Benedicts season, they also work on the new season of Queen Charlotte.

Seriously, dudes. Am I the only one who wants the new season of Queen Charlotte to look into George and Charlotte being royal parents and being London's royal power couple? I also hope they show us a young Edmund and young Violet meeting and having their great love story

I also want to see if the creators will actually make a decent man for my Goddess Agatha because she FREAKING DESERVES A MAN THAT IS NOT A CENTURY OLDER THAN HER AND DOESN'T CHEAT ON HIS WIFE ESPECIALLY WHEN HE HAS A DAUGHTER who BTW is angelic as Violet (I will protect her with my life)

I also hope to see how the creators will make the friendship of Agatha Danbury and Violet during the series.

AHHH I CAN'T WAIT I'M SO EXCITED!!!!!

Also, dudes, when the new seasons do come out, make sure the tea is piping hot cause $h1t's about to get SO REAL!

I'm also hoping we can have our power couples, kanthony, Polin, and Daphmon, making an appearance as the series continues. I WANT MORE OF THEM BEING ADORABLE WITH EACH OTHER!!!!!

Also one more thing for the fans. MAKE SURE YOU HAVE PLENTY OF TISSUES AND ICE CREAM (or any kind of comfort food). Cause we all know a lot of heartbreaking tragedy will soon come around. Especially for our girl Francesca and Penelope and Colin (regarding marina and John)

I can't even deal man

But anyways enjoy the post

(I'M FEELING SO MANY EMOTIONS RN!!!!!😊😭😢🥹😆😄)

[ageless-aislynn]

Nobody asked me any of these but, honestly, I wanted to know the answers to some of them myself, so... I'm answering what I want anyway! 🤷‍♀️😉

ao3 wrapped [writers edition]

How many words have you written this year?

I'm counting this as how many words in something that I posted, which is 14,819. A lot more than I expected, honestly, but most of it came from me doing several chapters of "15 Minutes" early in the year. 😉

How many works did you publish this year?

9 chapters in all, but only 4 individual works.

What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

"Sentence Starters Short Fic Collection" (Soap and Ghost, Call of Duty, Kaidan x Shepard, Mass Effect and Kai and Vannak, Halo the series) Yeah, they're all suuuuuper short but I'm always proud of myself whenever I write anything at all for fandoms/characters I've never attempted before. 😎👍

What work of yours has the most hits?

Definitely "15 Minutes" (John x female Reader, Halo the series). I'll never have anything else that will get this sort of response and I'm going to miss it when it's over. But I AM finishing it. Someway. Some how.

What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

"15 Minutes," yet again. It was meant to be a one-shot and then people liked it and asked for more.

Favorite title you used

"It's All Coming Along" (Master Chief, Halo/Halo the series) Never post things you wrote while in the middle of a bad insomnia bout, kids. You'll think something is funny and everybody else will probably not. I've debated removing this one but finally thought, eh, so it's dumb, that doesn't mean that one day, somebody might get a laugh from my puns. If not, then welp, I'm woman enough to have a total dud in my collection.🤷‍♀️😂

If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?

Didn't use song lyrics this year but I have in the past. I honestly just use whatever artist or song fits the story or theme. I have a really eclectic bunch of artists that I like, so you never know what'll pop up.

Pairing you wrote the most for this year?

John x female Reader, since "15 Minutes" had so many chapters and "It's All Coming Along" is technically a John x Reader as well. "Recreation" is Kai x male Reader and the Sentence Starters I've already mentioned above. 😉

Favorite pairing you wrote for this year?

It's actually the female OC/Frank West from my Dead Rising AU titled "Turn Back." They're the only ones I can consistently sit down and just bang out blocks of hundreds of words. I dunno why. 🤷‍♀️

What work was the quickest to write?

"It's All Coming Along" took literally two hours from "Hey, wouldn't it be funny if...?" to me hitting post. Don't do that, kids. Have a nap first if you haven't slept in, like 40 hours. Don't commit fiction, lol. 😆😴

What work took you the longest to write?

"15 Minutes" which was started 2 years ago along with "Recreation" probably deserves that "honor" for more than one reason, lol.

How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year?

In addition to finishing "15 Minutes" and "Recreation," I have 6 others: "Untitled Fluffy Vannak fic" (Halo the series), "Choices" (Noble Team choose your own Spartan adventure, Halo: Reach), "The Price" (Caitlin Frost/Hunter Zolomon, The Flash), "Guardian Angel" (Time Wraith!Caitlin Snow/Eobard Thawne, The Flash), "Split" (Caitlin Snow/Eobard Thawne, The Flash) and "Try" (TomCav!Eobard Thawne/Caitlin Snow/Mattobard!Eobard Thawne, The Flash).

What’s your longest work of the year?

"15 Minutes" chapters 7 - 11 totaled 12,064 words on their own.

What’s your shortest work of the year?

"It's All Coming Along" at 106 words

What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

I'm dragging all 8 of them with me, lol.

What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag?

I'm terrible at tagging so most of my tags are just pairings or the occasional warning I feel might be needed.

Your favorite character to write this year?

I'll always love writing for Master Chief John-117, my beloved. I also really love writing Cortana.

The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year?

All of them. Writer's block suuuuuucks. ���

What’s one pairing you want to explore next year?

Honestly, once I finish my WIPs I feel like I'm done. I'll probably keep writing things like my Dead Rising AU and my handful of Mass Effect: Andromeda fics but they're all totally just for me, not to be posted. If something pops to mind, I'll write it but, for the most part, I don't think fandom in general needs me anymore, lol.

Which work of yours have you reread the most?

"15 Minutes" because I'm trying to make sure I keep things consistent and wrap up any loose ends.

How many kudos in total did you get this year?

I can't really tell because there's no way to sort out the kudos that "15 Minutes" and "Recreation" already had on them. Excluding them, though, 21.

Which work has the most comments?

"15 Minutes."

Did you do any collaborative works this year?

No, I could barely work with myself this year, lol. I'm lousy at collabs, unfortunately.

Did you write any gifts this year?

No.

Did you receive any gifts this year?

No.

What’s your most common category?

I guess I technically write (hopefully) humorous romance?

What do you listen to while writing?

My inner editor screaming NO1CURRS and that I'm wasting my time even trying to finish my WIPs. I try to drown her out with various playlists. Here's one.

Favorite work you wrote this year?

Again, it's probably the "Turn Back" Dead Rising AU or "The Best Mistake" (Gil x OC, Mass Effect: Andromeda AU). Of my posted stuff, though, "15 Minutes."

Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

"Look, it's not my fault that that penguin documentary was kinda lame and—"

"IT WAS NOT!" Vannak bellowed back and took a swing at her that would've definitely put a marine in the infirmary for a month, if not in the ground, permanently. For Kai, it would've at the very least mussed her hair. "Those penguins are adorable and—"

"Lame. Laaaaaame," she singsonged, ducking a flurry of punches, then doing a very impressive parkour run up the wall into a backflip that sent her soaring over the enraged Spartan's head.

"THEY'RE NOT LAME, YOU TAKE THAT BACK!"

"Sentence Starters Short Fic Collection" Chapter 3, Kai and Vannak, Halo the series. For some reason, I absolutely LOVE the idea they're arguing over whether penguins are adorable or not, lol!

Biggest surprise while writing this year?

That I haven't totally given up. It's been verrrrrry close, friends. But every time I've thought, "Eh, why keep trying?" a comment will pop up, thanking me for writing something that gave them a laugh or the like and that'll give me the strength to keep in the fight. If there's even one person left who wants to read how these end or who'll check out the ones I haven't started posting yet, then I want to finish them.

Here's the original post if you'd like to reblog it for yourself or hey, if you'd like to just go ahead and answer it, no asks require, lol!

[spinteresting]

Watching Rick Gomez’s movie The Week. And I shall be putting all my thoughts in this post.

Spoilers below the cut

It’s James Madio!!!

Oh this is funny

He had a blast smashing things with a bat I know it

Ew the toothpaste

Aw the pup! So sweet

Watching on Tubi was worth it for the BSB detergent commercial

Very funny that his name is dick

Richard Speight Jr!!! He’s southern?

Atheist cookbook 😂 amazing

No! Not your friend’s wife. Bad decision.

Fuck… really bad decision

Oh wait. Open marriage? That isn’t working?

using his own words against him! 😂

It is funny though

This got so messy

I’m enjoying it

What a red beard

Oh is it getting gay?

No apparently Rick’s just good at making things feel that way for a moment

Song: Top that guy - fantastic

Another randomly southern person in this movie set in California

Rick almost missing his mouth with his flask 😆

Lotta leg. Not complaining

Feel like a 10 year old might be safer alone than with his drunk ass

The clips from the show

Frank John Hughes with long hair!

Pup with the ball!

At least she checked his breath for alcohol

Good job kid

He’s shifting into dad mode

That’s Rick’s kid right?

Madio again! Yeah!

Horoscopes 😂

Does Rick have these tattoos?

Probably, I doubt he put on fake tattoos for this

The podcast thing is interesting…whoa

Dick, it’s not the time to kiss people

The quacking notification reminds me of my husband

Skype 😂

I like this guy

You go Lenny!

Him and his brother!

All these cuts were a choice

This receptionist

So many red heads in this!

What a pretty pup

Dick you better say something

Though I have a feeling you don’t deserve your wife

The emotion in his voice

He’s off to find himself

I enjoyed this movie and thought it was good. Concept was great. I think with just a little something it could have been even better. Not sure what exactly though.

[jolieblack]

Jolie's thoughts on

The Solitary Cyclist (Sherlock & Co. podcast)

Let me start this time with the details I loved about this generally very lovable show:

The unlucky condom (John, you so walked into that one, sorry) and then the unlucky condom making its surprise reappearance. Genius.

Dr and Mrs Holmes should definitely consider life insurance if you ask me.

The high fiving MY HEART (Check out this very sweet art by @under-loch-n-key)

Sherlock keeping his bedroom pristine but the lounge in total disarray, thank you, YES

John and the Valentines 😆

John and his rental bike 😆

John and his Netflix board 😆

I also love how John contributed to solving the case again, and this time with medical expertise, too. I love when John gets to be Doctor Watson in this show. I feel it happens way more frequently than in any other adaption I know. (And if maybe not all the medical stuff is objectively correct, I honestly don’t care as long as it sounds plausible). And then he gets to do BAMF battlefield medicine as well! No wonder Sherlock is absolutely smitten highly impressed. (And I love that he voices that, too.)

I have seen complaints about Violet's lack of agency. She's centre stage, this case is all about her, but it’s not just men (one in particular) controlling and exploiting her, it’s also men (two teams of two, basically) who look out for her and ultimately rescue her. Indeed, she bears little resemblance to ACD‘s original character, who is incredibly tough and brave given the extreme vulnerability of her situation. ACD‘s original Violet absolutely deserves our admiration. This one… not so much. I‘m torn though - is that a bad thing? Is 2024 media under any obligation to show us only particularly strong female characters who take their fate into their own hands? I would have liked this case to end on a very decisive note along the lines of, Violet finally finds the courage to stand up to the arsehole, divorces him immediately and never falls victim to a similar dynamic again. It is unsatisfying that the last thing we hear from her is crying over the arsehole at the showdown. Instead, I would have loved some kind of reassurance that she‘s not going to forgive him and take him back. But is this episode a bad episode for not giving us the perfect ending? If you've ever had any insight into RL domestic violence issues and especially into coercive control and financial abuse, unfortunately the happy ending is not the norm, and escaping those patterns (like addiction) can be a long or even life-long journey full of relapses. So I find it honest and realistic, rather than a storytelling failure, that we get an open ending. Brilliant investigators can solve your case but they can’t always fix your life. In the words of Mariana the Wise, some people do need a therapist more than a detective.

[tirsu]

I'm just saying that Emmerdale fucked up with not making Aaron and Mack a couple. Those two have a great chemistry and they would've made a great couple. But thank good I've them as friends. I do love their friendship.

I've decided not to get excited about Aaron and John as who knows what kinda man John is, he could be asshole like Robert (I hope not, Aaron deserves decent guy). But I find it very funny that John's third Sugden Aaron has been with. 😆

[zootopiathingz]

I watched Zootopia like 6 months ago on a whim, and now the fixation is still hyper...ing.

Yeah

Anyways, Judy and Nick are the best and deserve everything (I genuinely couldn't remember anyone else's names the first time I saw it) aaaaand yeah it's sad that the Fandom is basically nonexistent.

Actually, it's still going strong(?) on AO3 (i've made a few one-shots (shameless self promotion I'm Not_Quite_A_Moron there)) but still, kinda sucks.

Anyways, random headcanon time:

Nick has two moms (he doesn't have specific names for both of them, he just yells "MOM!" anytime he needs help)

Judy actually really likes eating meat, Nick just has to convince her to try it

Nick became really closed off and touch starved after the Junior Ranger Scouts incident, so now, he's a chronic cuddler (especially with Judy (which she loves))

Judy's on the autistic spectrum (she often stims by tapping her foot, and she likes to display affection via playful punches to the arm)

Judy was born on the same day that Nick got muzzled, as if the universe itself felt bad and said "here, have a rabbit" (definitely didn't steal this one from Tumblr nope certainly not)

Nick doesn't really like Gazelle's music, he's more of a rock kind of guy, but he'll stomach any song for Judy’s sake

Judy's asexual (Take one look at the nudist club scene and tell me she isn't at least demi)

Bestie I’d just like to say AAAAAAAAAA

Sorry, but I just got SO excited when I saw someone submitting headcanons! It’s been way too long since I’ve been able to have a good ol’ Zootopia discussion. Oh and I’ll certainly check out your fics! My user is Pixarpnflover so be on the look out for some kudos!✨

Anyway, I love the idea of Nick being raised by two moms! There was supposed to be a plotline about his dad—John Wilde, I believe was his name—but got scrapped along with a lot of other content. So until it’s actually mentioned in canon I’m choosing to believe his mom in the flashback was in fact a raging lesbian lmao🤷‍♀️ also would that make him a double mama’s boy?🤔

Ooo an herbivore converting to a meat diet? How intriguing! I like to think now that she lives in the city that Judy would be open to trying new foods, which would include poultry and fish. I can see her favoring sushi or even turkey.

Nick being openly affectionate after meeting Judy, and reserving most of that said affection for her? Hell yeah. He’s very unapologetic about it too. He’s waited far too long to share that amount of vulnerability and comfort with someone. No way he’s ever going to hold back🫂

Autistic Judy my beloved🙌🏻 You cannot convince me she’s even a little bit neurotypical, I will not believe you lol. I love that her natural rabbit behavior could actually be interpreted as stimming!

Dude, I have believed this headcanon for so long!! The second I found out their age difference, I just knew there had to be some kind of coincidence going on there. I mean, Nick could’ve just said “when I was a kid” when beginning the story, but instead he specified his age (or an estimate, at least) and I think that a choice on the writers’ part. Anyway, I’m a big believer in fate/soulmates, so even just the idea of Judy being born, destined to cross paths with Nick someday to heal his childhood trauma and make his life better, just melts my heart❤️😭

Haha yeah, you can tell the concert at the credits that Nick was only there for Judy😆 Not to say he wasn’t enjoying himself, he just wasn’t nearly as enthusiastic as everyone else. But ya know, the things ya do for your girlfriend!😋 I can also imagine Judy listening to music she doesn’t necessarily enjoy either. A certain loud rock song starts playing on the radio and before she can even think about changing the station, Nick goes “oh I like this one!” And so she smiles and suffers through it. She may even end up liking it anyway!😌

As for this last one, I kinda have to disagree. Not to say she isn’t ace or demi, and no hate to anyone who shares this opinion! But idk, to me I don’t think someone not wanting to see a bunch of people walking around ass-naked makes them ace or a prude (which I’ve seen some fanfics try to claim her to be?) I mean, I’m horny asf and I’d be just as uncomfortable walking around a nudist club😆😅

…I never thought I’d type a sentence like that lol

Anyway, thanks for sharing these! I sure hope the fandom comes back someday, but in the meantime I’ll be here waiting and open to exchanging more headcanons! :3

[apprenticestanheight]

I've seen some fics of these, but I'll never turn down a coffinshipping fic where Strahm has to patch up Hoffman from when Jill uses the Reverse Bear-Trap on him. It's just sweet to me that although they hate each other, they love each other or are rather obsessed with each other, and yet Strahm would stitch up Hoffman's face... even though Hoffman put Strahm through two deadly traps 😆

Cat and Mouse- Hoffstrahm

Hi!! I am so sorry that this took as long as it did--I swear I meant to do it but stuff gets buried really quickly in my inbox and my track record with object permanence is kind of terrible, which definitely applies to requests as a lot of the time they're left to sit until I work through a backlog.

HOWEVER, this is my second coffinshipping fic and in my saw rewatch I am barely halfway into the second movie so I apologize if their characterizations are at all off, I like to think I've nailed my characterization of Hoffman but I haven't written for Strahm very much so my characterization of him might not be perfect and the same goes for how I've written their interactions.

Fic type- this is some light angst

Warnings- mentions of canon-typical saw violence, murder, and this has been edited but not very well--be wary of spelling and grammatical errors, I wrote this while tired and edited it while also tired.

Peter should probably be putting a gun to Mark Hoffmans head, if he's being honest with himself. He should be holding a gun to Marks head and demanding a confession or some kind of acknowledgement of the crimes he'd committed under the Jigsaw alias, but he's not.

He's not because Mark showed up at his house and gestured to a very gruesome looking wound on the side of his face, and when Mark wordlessly asked Peter to stitch him up, before he could think through his response, Peter was agreeing and grabbing a towel and a first aid kit with a needle and thread inside while instructing Mark to sit on the couch.

And then he was wetting the towel with antiseptic to clean the wound, telling Mark he was getting what he deserved when he flinched away or shouted with his discomfort. And then he was actively helping a serial killer.

He recalls the words that Perez had told him once, just before he'd interviewed Jill Tuck that first time.

"You should be careful," she said. "Especially with mostly unsolved cases like this one, that work ethic of yours can turn into obsession real quick. Hatred for someone might as well be able to turn into obsession with the drop of a hat, Peter, so I'd watch myself. Make sure it wasn't an obsession before I kept on with the case."

At the time, Peter had scoffed at the notion. "I'm not becoming obsessed," he'd told her, even pairing it with a smirk, like a smirk could've been convincing. "And if I am, hatred and obsession will prove to be so dangerous a line to walk that I step away anyway. I know that much--I know when to step away from my work."

But, Peter supposes he should've known that he would know when to step away from his work in all aspects except for whichever one concerned Mark Hoffman, who he felt a deep disdain for and yet wanted to know everything about all at once.

Of course the line blurred whenever Mark looked at him, had been particularly blurry as he stitched up a wound caused by one of Hoffmans so-called enemies, Jill fucking Tuck herself.

"She put a trap on me," Mark explains as Peter finishes the stitches. "That fucking bitch put a goddamned trap on me, claiming it was Johns will and all that other shit."

"I really don't want specifics, Hoffman," Peter says dryly. "You put me into two deadly fucking traps, yeah? I don't need to hear about whichever woman you've made an enemy out of, even if I hate her as much as the next person."

Mark smiles at him. Peter doesn't know if he wants to punch him square in the lips or pull him into a kiss so intense it shocks the air out of their lungs.

"You do realize what I have to do if you let me leave this house not in handcuffs, yeah?"

Peter runs his tongue over his teeth, stands up from the crouching position he'd taken while stitching up Hoffmans wound.

"I do," he says. "You're going to go kill a relatively innocent woman because she followed what I am presuming to be the will of John fuckin' Kramer, who was her murderous ex husband who willingly put innocent people to death. Yeah, I think that's easy enough to follow, Hoffman."

Mark stands, grins at Peter.

"You realize that letting me go means the chase continues?"

Peter shrugs. "You'll slow down one of these days, Hoffman. You serial killers always do. When you do get slow I'll catch you and be the one to put your ass behind bars."

Mark looks to his feet, "I really do wish this could've been different," he says.

Peter forces himself to look at the brown color he'd chosen for his curtains.

"You have fifteen seconds to be down the street and turning the corner before I start chasing you and eventually arrest your ass," he says, feeling conflicted as he speaks.

The simple truth is that Mark Hoffman is a serial killer. The simple truth is the fact that Peter should be putting him into handcuffs and bringing him to the station while he declares the Jigsaw killer caught once and for all.

But, when has their relationship ever been simple, really? Peter cannot pinpoint a moment of simplicity from it's beginning.

So, when Mark nods, bolts out the front door, Peter lets him go. He falls into the couch with a monumentally tired sigh and presses his face into the palm of his hand. A few minutes pass, and he laughs to himself.

He and Mark are in a cat and mouse scenario, and while Peter hates it, he also knows that he wouldn't have it any other way.

[therealslimshakespeare]

I probably won’t be able to articulate this as well as I’d like so please don’t take any of it as criticism, but it’s interesting to me that you decided to pair up Gale with a woman but also later decide that he’s probably gay. I’m honestly not one for shipping characters into a gay relationship just because but there were definite and obvious homoerotic undertones in MOTA, in fact I’d say Bucky loves Buck in *that way* more so than Gale loves John (although maybe he’s just quieter and more reserved about it). I guess what I’m really trying to say, is that like many others, I don’t particularly like Maureen, she isn’t deserving of Gale but maybe her fate is to have a gay husband who’ll always be hankering after a guy he can’t have (in my head, anyhow) but also I’m upset that we’ll never get to read a Buck/Bucky fic written by one of Tumblr’s best writers :(

Hello, I’m assuming you’re referencing this ask/blurb?

No offense meant back, but I honestly don’t find a great deal to answer in this ask. And I often try to find things to agree with or appreciate even in asks with a varying viewpoint and opinion. But dear, I know I’m not supposed to take it as criticism, so I won’t, but what is it intended for?

You’re informing me you don’t like an OC. That’s fine, and that’s your right. I would ask you to consider how respectful you are being to her author when you weave an entire extra story (in you head is grand but now it’s in my inbox too) about her being condemned to a fate you’re also suggesting is negative, please?

You’re informing me you wouldn’t immediately assume gayness due to onscreen chemistry. Amen. Yeah. Agree with that. And also agree with Bucky being more obvious, of the pair in the tv series. This is a complete AU of a dramatized tv show of real events. We’ve got women in the stalag. We’ve got a gay Buck Cleven. We could have aliens and cat shape-shifters if we want. Because it’s my AU, and those are the definitions of AUs. They’re alternate happenings 😆

You say you find it interesting to ship a certain thing that happened very regularly in the 1940’s. A gay man marrying a woman. That’s fine, but I will. I’m not going to avoid writing other things of the time -the segregation of races, inequality of women, rape of female combatants- and then breeze through the issue this was made to be for every man oriented in this manner. I’m quite passionate about exploring marriages like this one, and it’s not a fate worse than death but it’s also unfair they were the only option. That’s what we have before us..

The same logic rather clearly assumes that being bi isn’t being gay? Or your wording suggests that, though i really don’t think you meant that. There are plenty of sexes who primarily like a certain sex but then are occasionally attracted to the other. Sometimes even a single person of the other, and due to wanting children/social scenes etc, may choose to marry that other person of the opposite gender. Doesn’t mean I’m shipping a “gay character” with someone who will make them somehow less gay.

Sometimes the love of your life is not the one your sex drive goes nuts for either, sometimes. And that’s doubly confusing in those times.

But, now that I’ve hammered on that, because I really feel strongly on this and need some respect for my creative choices here —lemme add, it’s very sweet that you apparently want me to write them. I’ve dabbled a little in the other universe and in this one -we will have a lot of Bucky x Buck.

And who says we might not get an entirely new full on Buck x Bucky story from me one day? 😈 goodness knows I love them, but I also know others are writing them so well and after having embibed so much of their work, it would be near to plagiarism for me to embark on that right now.🥰

[whenthegoldrays]

Northanger Abbey for the top 3 ask game 😊

Hi!!! Thanks for the ask! Sorry it got lost under some stuff while I went on hiatus 🫢

• favorite characters: Cathy, Henry, and Eleanor!

• least favorite characters: Isabella Thorpe, General Tilney, and John Thorpe (yes, Isabella is first because I can’t stand her fakeness, I just absolutely see red every time she speaks, and with General Tilney it’s like well the vibes are definitely off but he’s tolerable in moments. Thorpe is also freaking annoying but he’s at least kinda funny.)

• otps: obviously Cathy x Henry on top!! then Eleanor x Viscount Washingbill, and uhhh. uh. Cathy’s parents!

• notps: ejdhdhdhe I feel like there are so many. Cathy x Thorpe for sure, James x Isabella, and in a way, General x Mrs. Tilney?? Like, I know it’s important that they had Henry and Eleanor, and I wouldn’t want to prevent that, but one also wants to save her from that terrible man, you know?? She deserved better!

• brotps: I mean the sibling relationships here are on point! Henry and Eleanor, Cathy and James, and then Cathy and Eleanor to round it out nicely :)

• favorite chapters/scenes: I loveeee Henry’s introduction, I was full-on giggling and kicking my feet. I also love when he finds Cathy in his mom’s room, like it almost makes me wanna die of embarrassment but there’s also such a kindness and fondness in how he treats her in response! And it’s funny and I could picture it so vividly and it irks me that the adaptation decided to play it completely differently from the book because they literally had a perfect scene right there! I also enjoyed when Cathy visits Henry’s parsonage.

• other things u think ppl who like this thing should watch/read/play: hmmm cute fluffy romance with a generous serving of humor and just a piiinch of angst? The Blue Castle by L.M. Montgomery (woman who loves to dream x jaded but charming man), the kdrama Hometown Cha Cha Cha, and this is probably cheating but!! my original story which is still in the works, Hardwick House 😆

• my rating of this media out of 3: 3/3 😋

[bloodyentrails]

Black sails! Tell me about black sails!

alright alright (nearly spelled that altright 😆)!

Favorite character

gotta be flint. flint forever and ever. character of all time. just. i think what stands out to me is that he's a character with believable adult trauma. i feel like we are inundated with childhood trauma, and it's not that childhood trauma has no place or is meaningless, but please, for the love of god, adults can get fucked up too, and in different ways, and the consequences are different. i love how he carries his trauma and is just unapologetically fucked-up about it.

Second favorite character

anne bonny. just. i remember a historian friend going on about her at the time that the pirates of the caribbean movies were out, and i somehow remembered her and god i love her in this show. there's something so visceral about her. flint is all intellect and showmanship, she exists in the shadows for so long, doesn't speak much at all, and just, you know, murders people 🙈🙈🙈 as one does. also i think her actress is so good. (i still want to make an anne bonny doll because i love her costumes so much, but that's also the reason i haven't started, they look very elaborate)

Least favorite character

gotta be john silver. i watched two treasure islands since i saw black sails, the disney one and one the bbc made for tv, and i dislike him in that story too. mostly, i think because i already came out disliking him so much from black sails 😆 the writing and acting is excellent, i just want to push him off a cliff.

The character I’m most like

uh. i think i identify most with flint? but i'm not in any way starting a revolution, i just love how angry he is at the world. the characters in the show are all very smart, and cunning and they are survivalists. i think i'd be a spectator (and die a gruesome death at some point coz no one stays a spectator for long)

Favorite pairing

i love james mcgraw and thomas hamilton. i shipped them when i didn't know they were a canon pairing and then when they were canonised it was even better to see that they were written to be together. they are so instantly into each other, it's such a joy. i love shipping equals and i love how equal they are and how aware of that in each other. and how much they love each other. it drives me insane.

Least favorite pairing

woodes rogers and eleanor guthrie. eleanor is a bit of an acquired taste but i love her arc and she deserved so much better. she's so conflicted over who she is supposed to be and she makes many shitty choices and she's so good at alienating people and also i love her and she needed a partner who saw her so much better. woodes rogers is just awful.

Favorite moment

flint murdering hal gates. i've been meaning to tell you about this actually, because ahahaha if jason murdered the joker like that, i would fucking ascend 🙈🙈🙈 i love murder shown as a kind of intimacy and there a few instances that i know of that in fiction and i love that so dearly. but also the aftermath of that murder is so good. i think very often the murder is shown to be an end of itself and i'm not sure it always should be. so having an aftermath to is so great.

flint gets to experience so many consequences. i want to hug him.

Rating out of 10

i think for someone who is reluctant to watch television shows and was kindly persuaded to give this a go and stuck with it, it's absolutely a 10/10. i think it is peak television and made with so much love and thought. it has flaws and shortcomings but what doesn't.

[cellard0ors]

Tagged by @be-side-my-self

Most Hits: (230, 959) Once More, With Feeling - fake dating with Sherlock and John. Ah, Johnlock. Not at all surprised. That and this story was actually featured in an article on Screenrant for 10 Amazing Work of Fan Fiction, which was a major shock.

Second Most Kudos: (3,594) Believer - This is my sacrifice to the BuzzFeed Unsolved fandom. Demon!Shane and Ryan friends-turned-lovers romance. I miss the old days with these boys. Not a fan of the Watcher content. Sorry, not sorry.

Third Most Comment Threads (575) Skeptic - The sequel to Believer. Demon!Shane out of control and Ryan trying to reign him in. This story still doesn't have the proper ending it deserves, but I lost my muses thread for it and some bullying from various nasty anons made me lose my appetite for it. Someday maybe I'll finish it up proper.

Fourth Most Bookmarks (358) This Divide Between You and I - Gravity Falls Stancest! I wrote this almost the moment Ford appeared. Then the show kept going and it became very non canon (not that their twincest isn't, but I digress) but it's still one of my most favorite works.

Fifth Most Words (94,124) The Cards We Are Dealt - I'm so happy at least one of my Quarry fics got a highlight! I will always remember the thrill of writing this! I was getting out almost a chapter a day! Sometimes I wish I took my time and added more to it (probably why I have so many add-ons) but overall it's one of my favorite fics.

Six Fic With The Least Words (758) Light of the Moon - This was also Gravity Falls Stancest but a coffee shop AU where it eventually became a throuple with Preston Northwest and this is from his POV. I had a lot of fun writing him. Still surprised this is my shortest fic. Honestly thought it would be my Pocahontas fic! 😆

[loosesodamarble]

For you ask game my dear Loo 🤭

Show: Shadow house ore black clover what is better

Carackter: Nacht ore josele wich carackter would you give up writing complete😈

Romance (but this is a big joke) Nachtxyami Ore Nachtxjack for a little insider because mad Morgan🤭😈

Have a good day my dear Loo hope you are ok and a good Weck ☺️

Yay! Giving me multiple things to choose between!

Show: I think I might have to go with Shadows House. The scope is a lot smaller than Black Clover. The characters are more limited in their agency and abilities. But honestly, I think that's what makes the series so great. It's these young kids trying to survive a cultish system that sees them as a resource. It's dark and tense. But also Emilico and Kate and John and everyone are such babies and I wanna protect them so muuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuch! Also, Edward can die die die! 😁

Character: I'd have to give up writing Josele. Because, well, I have other ocs (maybe not as entertaining as Josele but still others). And without Nacht, I wouldn't really be able to write Morgen either, so I'd be losing two at once! 😭 Plus maybe if I gave up Josele, I could write Nacht's dynamics with the canon BB characters instead./lh

Romance: YamiNacht. I'm sorry but Jack thought that Nacht was Morgen. And if a person can't tell apart identical twins at a glance... Shouldn't try dating an identical twin. 🙄 Shaking my head. Jack doesn't deserve my depressed little Nacht. Also, the aesthetics of YamiNacht work so much better. Nacht is lean and mean while Yami is a big, beefy himbo. Nacht paired with Jack who is also lean and mean is just... too much of one thing. 😆

[johnsbleu]

I've always been a silent reader, but I just wanted to say I love Hold My Hand! The way you write is just chef's kiss 🤌 I've been re-reading some of the earlier chapters again and again because I'm too scared to reach the latest chapters 😆

Love your version of John, btw. After everything that the man wen through in the movies, Lord knows he deserve this kind of peaceful life you gave him. The Rome arc is definitely my favorite! Ugh, the romantic and cheesy side of John never fails to turn me into a puddle 😩

I know you've seen JW Ch.4, so I was wondering if you're gonna weave that into the HMH timeline? And if so, how will you do that?

Also, what are your future plans for HMH? Kinda curious how you plan to end the series (so I can prepare my heart and mind for the ending haha)

Anyways, just thought I'll drop by to give you some love and to say you've got many of us supporting your writing (even if some of us supports in the shadows hehe).

Please continue to write more 🙏 And hoping the writing gods shower you with never-ending inspirations like John makes bullets rain upon his enemies 🫰

omgggg thank you so much! i adore you!

yeah so as for jw4, before they even started filming it, i wrote a chapter where john surprises her with a trip to paris for valentine's day. they didn't end up going since ro was having separation anxiety and decided to postpone it. so when it was announced that john would be in paris for jw4 i was like omg this is perfect. then the movie came out lmaoooo.

so yeah i do want to weave some of the events into it. i think paris is probably something he's never told her (understandably so since it would really be a lot to take in--his whole life is, tbh) and of course i'll have to change a few things for obvious reasons. i can't say certain things bc i don't want to spoil it but i obviously have to take some creative liberties there. also it's a chapter coming up soon too so idk how i'm going to post it since some people won't have seen JW4 yet. i guess i'll just have to tag it as john wick spoilers. MASSIVE john wick spoilers, obviously, and hope that they come back to it once they've seen the movie.

as for ending hmh, i really don't have any plans lmao. i just think of random things and i'm like i need to write a chapter of hmh with this! so i don't really have any plans to end it bc i do still really enjoy writing it and it's such a nice creative outlet for me! so yeah, no plans on ending any time soon!

[powerfultenderness]

i was very deep in a new hyperfixation when you posted this, but i saved it to read later when i could think clearly again, and ohmygod! i might be a little upset at myself that it took me so long to get to this!

the catalyst is so funny! with reader thinking it's all about the gorilla (and john almost figuring that out lol!), but then she remains cool enough that team just accepts that she knows about butterflies! 😆

the love between them is everything! of course Vig was hesitant to reveal his identity, even though he clearly wanted a deeper relationship!

“Man, I am so good at this secret identity thing if I can keep it a secret from a PI.” - aaah, this whole scene is so cute! 🥰 really, the whole way she wants adrian to feel comfortable enough about his secret and to want to really commit to the relationship and then he doesn't!! 😱

"“And I wish you had given me a reason to stay, V. I deserved someone who could trust me. And you… you deserved someone you could be yourself with. We couldn’t be that for each other.”- 😭

“You think I fund being Vigilante on a busboy salary? I get a lot of tips.”- lmaooo!!! omg yea if i saw a busyboy THAT cute, i'd tip extra super generously too!

"He tilts his head and you watch dimples form as the corners of his mouth turn into a mischievous smile. “That’s kind of the idea.”- listen, i know in the show we don't see him flirty like this, but this charm fits him sooo damn well! i love it!

“Let me find out if you’re a bad kisser. At least I can tell myself I’m not missing out on anything if you are.” “You’re gonna be so mad…” He cups your face and brushes your cheekbone with his thumb. “I’m a really good kisser.” - ugh!!! got me meltinggggg!!!

the smut is hot, very hot! but also so freakin romantic!! so passionate and i love the way both of them clearly wanted and missed being together! but now they're together in a way that's even closer than before! him asking her to say his name again and the little chant/babble of his name coming from her! ugh!!

"You lunge forward and bite on his neck."- YES!!! highlight! yes!!!! NOM!!! Grrr!! AHHH!!!

Also! the m&ms!! what a fucking delight (lol)! the wya it opens with her munching on m&ms all nervously, the way she shares the m&ms with john as she's sharing the intel she gathered. the little bit of foreshadowing of blindly fumbling around candy packs while looking for a condom and then seeing he stocked up because

“I guess I always hoped you might change your mind and come back. So I bought them whenever I thought about you.” - ahhhhh!!! 😍😍😭😭

he is a fucking sweetheart and i love him and i love this soo much! it's so good! and so fun to read!! what an excellent fic!

Never Been Kissed (Adrian Chase x fem!reader)

Rating: Explicit - 18+ only

Word Count: 7.3k

Warnings: SMUT, Second chance romance, Canon typical descriptions of murder and violence, Oral (fem receiving), P in V, Safe sex (male condom), Multiple orgasms

Summary: You're a PI who joins the 11th Street Kids after a chance meeting with John Economos on the dark web. Unfortunately for you, your ex-friend-with-benefits Vigilante is here too. (Based on this ask by anon)

A/N: This took a hot minute. The M&Ms were originally cigarettes but these days I'm a healthy queen free of nicotine -purr.

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Chapter text:

The dim fire exit sign outside the back of the abandoned video store flickers as you suck a peanut M&M between your tongue and the roof of your mouth anxiously. You hope your contact hurries the fuck up - if he makes you wait any longer you’ll finish an entire party bag from nervousness.

It was stupid, really, even reckless, to meet a stranger from the dark web. But when some guy called TechConomos_11 had responded to you in a chat room where you were discussing the intel you had on some sinister goings-on in Evergreen, you knew you had to meet him and his team.

Because you’ll be damned if anyone catches the escaped gorilla before you.

There’s a clink of a padlock and chain falling to the floor, the sound of a heavy emergency exit bar being pushed down and when the door opens you’re face to face with a large, bearded man wearing glasses. 

“Are you the PI?”

If you had to draw a sketch of what you thought a guy you met on the dark web would look like, he would be it. Not a neckbeard, exactly, just someone with the distinct aura of having too much time spent in front of a screen.

You nod. “TechConomos?”

“Call me John. Come inside - the team’s all here.”

You shove the half-empty pack of M&Ms into your bag and he leads you through to the back office. 

“This is Murn, Harcourt and Adebayo.” He gestures to his three associates sitting in the office who each acknowledge you in turn. “And these guys-”

“Fuck it! Fuck, fuck fuck!”

The yelling draws your attention to the window separating the office from the rest of the video store and it’s like a knife in your gut when you see him.

Vigilante.

“Ugh, fuck! It hurts to walk!” Vigilante whines as he limps around. He turns to pace some more but stops in his tracks in alarm when he sees you. He immediately dives to the floor, launching himself behind a desk in a futile attempt to hide.

Vigilante is the last person you expected to - or wanted to - see here. It’s not his usual MO - normally he’d be out hunting thugs and drug dealers. What was he doing caught up in this operation with some tech guy and a team who you suspected were either current or former soldiers?

There’s a roaring laugh and your eyes find Peacemaker, doubled over in his chair, laughing like an idiot at Vigilante sprawled on the ground. 

That explains Vigilante’s involvement. Looks like his idol, Peacemaker, is finally out of prison and the first thing he does is rope Vigilante into whatever this is. The whole thing stinks. Why is there an entire team with two capes looking for an escaped zoo animal? Any why did one of those capes have to be Vigilante? 

You close your eyes and groan. “You didn’t tell me you were working with them.”

“You know each other?” asks Harcourt.

“Just Vigilante.” You sigh and follow them into the video store.

“Hey, asshole,” you say, peering over the desk Vigilante is hidden behind. He looks up at you and props his masked head up on his arm casually as if you didn’t just see him throw himself there a second ago.

“Oh, hey!” he says, feigning pleasant surprise.

“Why are you on the floor?”

“I hurt my pinky toe.”

“Yeah? Which one?” You walk around the desk and stand at his feet to get a better look.

“Nononono! Wait!”

You clock the way his visor-covered eyes dart down to his right foot in panic. 

“Woah, did you think I was gonna kick you or something?” Sure, you have beef but you’re kind of offended he’d think that you’d harm him on purpose.

“No…” he mumbles sheepishly.

“Asshole.” You roll your eyes and sit on the hard wooden surface, turning away from him to face the team.

“Who the fuck is this?” Peacemaker asks Murn before looking between you and Vigilante. “Do you two know each other or something?”

You don’t deign to reply.

There’s a squeak of a chair being dragged on linoleum as Vigilante pulls himself up onto a seat next to Peacemaker with a wince.

“Economos says you want to join the team,” says Murn. 

“That’s right.”

“Why?”

“I know everything that goes on in Evergreen.”

“And?”

“I have information and skills that I want money for. Obviously.”

“How much?”

You were talking about splitting the reward for the gorilla but Murn’s expectant look makes it clear this is a contract. What’s that saying again? A contract in the hand is worth a gorilla in the bush? … Something like that.

“Well, what are you paying him?” You cast your eyes at Vigilante who shrugs. Unbelievable. “They’re not paying you? Idiot.”

Murn and Harcourt glance at each other awkwardly. “This is strictly off the books,” says Murn.

“So you were just going to take advantage of him? No way. I want my pay backdated for all the intell I’ve found for you. And his too for whatever it is he’s doing for you.”

“How do you guys know each other?” asks John, pulling up a chair behind his laptop.

You look at Vigilante warningly and answer before he can open his fat mouth. “I’ve sent some work his way once or twice. And compensated him fairly for it,” you add pointedly.

“Oh, they’ve definitely fucked,” laughs Peacemaker.

“Shouldn’t you be in Belle Reve?” You glare at him.

Peacemaker ignores the question. “Did he keep the mask on with you too?” He pouts faux-sympathetically.

This catches you off-guard. Not Vigilante and Peacemaker fucking - Vigilante is so obsessed with him that you guessed it was only a matter of time.

But he did keep his mask on.

Vigilante groans and leans forward in his chair, resting his elbows on his knees and staring determinedly at his injured foot.

“Ha! I knew it!”

“Enough!” Murn gives Peacemaker a severe look before turning his attention back to you. “John says you know the location of what we’re looking for.”

“I’m not telling you until you get me up to speed with what you’ve got so far. John wouldn’t tell me shit online. Call it a show of good faith.”

“And we’re supposed to just take your word that you actually have useful information?” asks Adebayo.

John opens his mouth to reply but Vigilante beats him to the punch.

“She knows,” says Vigilante, finally looking up. “She’s… she’s a good PI. If she says she knows, she knows.”

“Well, we can’t divulge state secrets just because Vigilante vouches for you. Tell us the ‘where’ and if it checks out - you’re in,” says Harcourt.

You look around at this unlikely group. If you want to catch the gorilla you need their help. You need their weapons. You need their money.

“It’s at the Glan Tai bottling plant. You heard of it?”

“Pulling it up now…” John types on his keyboard. “It makes sense, Murn. They’ve got the production, the distribution channels… This is probably it.”

Distribution channels? What’s the gorilla at Glan Tai got to do with distribution? 

You keep your face neutral - if there’s one thing you’ve learned from this job, it’s when to sit back, shut up and listen.

You try to piece things together as Murn talks about ‘butterflies’ and their ‘food source’. Economos checks highway CCTV footage and confirms that your intel is correct. This is extremely lucky for you because you’re clearly talking about two entirely different things. You wonder if these ‘butterflies’ are some kind of parasite-induced sleeper agent. And maybe the food source is a drug to release them from their fugue state?

“...And the gorilla?” you ask eventually.

“What about the gorilla?” asks Harcourt.

“The gorilla is at Glan Tai.”

“There’s a Butterfly gorilla?” asks Vigilante excitedly. “That is so cool!”

“Is that even possible?” Harcourt asks Murn who nods.

You’ve seen some shit but a gorilla sleeper agent takes the fucking cake. They all seem totally unfazed so you pretend to be too.

“So, what’s our next move? When do we start killing these aliens?” asks Peacemaker.

Aliens.

You discreetly scan the others. Nobody else bats an eyelid at Peacemaker’s use of that word. 

What the hell have you gotten yourself into?

“You two get some rest, come back tonight,” says Murn to Peacemaker and Vigilante. “And you - you’ve got evidence of what we’re doing here?” There’s no point in lying so you nod. “Bring it back here so we can destroy it. All of it.”

You, Peacemaker and Vigilante, leave the video store. You cross the street to get to your car but Vigilante calls your name. You turn around to see him hurriedly limping over while Peacemaker climbs into the Vigilantemobile.

“Hey, I’m glad you’re part of the team now.”

“I can’t return the sentiment.” You scowl at him. Peacemaker beeps the horn of Vigilante’s car. “You’d better hurry up - you don’t want to keep your boyfriend waiting.”

“We’re not in a relationship. You know I only wanted to be with-”

“Don’t you dare.”

“C’mon, can’t you at least tell me why you stopped answering my calls?”

“I already told you - I’m not going to wait around my entire life for a guy who won’t even show me his face. Or tell me his real name.”

“I can’t -”

“Save your excuses for someone who gives a shit.” Peacemaker blasts the horn again. “At least I know you keep the mask on when you fuck him too. It’s not like he’s seen your face.”

Vigilante’s visor-covered eyes avoid contact with yours. His hesitation is like a punch in the gut. 

“He’s seen your face?” You don’t mean to whisper it. The words just spill from your lips like you’ve been winded.

“Not like that. That was just a meaningless threesome-”

“But he’s seen it?”

He nods.

You push him aside to throw your car door open and get in. “Fuck you, V.” You slam it shut and drive away, not even bothering to glance at him standing haplessly in your rearview mirror.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later that evening, you and John cross-check your intel. It’s becoming clear that this is way out of your fucking league. But if Vigilante can do it, you can too.

Right?

“You want some peanut M&Ms?”.

He accepts a handful gladly. “Why is so much of this about the fucking gorilla?” John asks with his mouth full, looking over your shoulder at your laptop screen.

The necessity of any quick thinking on your part is interrupted when you hear Murn’s voice ringing from the back office.

“You told Vigilante to kill Peacemaker's father?!” 

You and John drop what you’re doing and peer tentatively around the door of the office where Murn is berating Adebayo.

“I didn't tell him to… I just kinda put the idea in his head,” she explains.

“That Peacemaker would be better off without his father?”

Oh no.

“Where’s Vigilante?” you ask suspiciously, joining Murn as he stands with his arms crossed. He looks furious.

“He’s in jail,” mumbles Adebayo. “I might have suggested that if someone were to go in and kill Peacemaker’s dad, all our problems would go away.”

You run your hands through your hair.

“How could you manipulate him like that?” Your combat boots squeak on the floor as you pace across it, catastrophising aloud. “In case you hadn’t noticed, Vigilante is very fucking easy to manipulate. And he has a record. What if he kills someone in prison and gets locked up for life? Or what if he gets himself killed trying?”

“Peacemaker’s gonna see right through this. He’ll know exactly what you tried to do,” says Murn to Adebyo sternly.

They’re fucking crazy. 

“Who gives a shit about Peacemaker? Vigilante is locked in jail with the White Dragon!” You plead urgently. Vigilante is in real danger and all they care about is Peacemaker’s feelings.

“Economos, can you get Vigilante out of the system before he screws us worse than we're already screwed?”

John sighs. “I don’t even know this guy’s name.”

The four of them look at you.

You cross your arms. “I can’t tell you his name.”

“Guess he’s gonna die in prison then -”

“Last name Chase. First name Adrian.” You blurt out his secret that you’ve been holding deep in your chest. “But you can’t tell him I told you. He doesn’t know I know.”

You crowd around John’s laptop as he pulls up Adrian’s file. 

“We shouldn’t be looking at this,” you say as you stare intently at his mugshot - the mugshot you’re so well acquainted with. You’d rather die than admit how many hours you’ve spent sitting at your desk late at night, looking at his police record on your laptop.

And suddenly, it’s like you’re back in bed with him, as he stares breathlessly at the ceiling and you lie there naked on top of his bare chest, looking into his masked face, picturing that very same mugshot underneath it.

“Guess again,” Vigilante says. You can tell even under the mask that he’s grinning, enjoying your questioning.

“Hmm… are you a doctor? You’ve stitched yourself up a lot.”

“You think I’m a doctor and live here?”

Vigilante watches as you make a show of pursing your lips thoughtfully. The warm afternoon sun streaks through the gaps in his blinds onto his bed. It makes it look like there’s a golden halo around your messy bed hair. He tucks a small strand behind your ear as you walk your index and middle fingers along his chest and down his shoulder. 

“Maybe a fireman with these big strong arms?”

He likes you when you let your walls down like this. You’re almost downright playful when he’s satisfied you - a personality trait he still hasn’t extricated from you outside these four walls.

“Man, I am so good at this secret identity thing if I can keep it a secret from a PI.”

You laugh. “I guess so.”

He didn’t know that you had long known his real job. And his real name. Or that you’d trace your fingers over his face on your laptop screen as you tried to reconcile it with the masked killer who was content to let you into his bed but never his real life.

“Wasn’t he our busboy at Fennel Fields?” Adebayo’s question snaps you back to the present. 

“Can you pull him out?” You ask John.

“It’s… done.” He says, with a final click of his keyboard. “Let’s just hope he hasn’t done anything stupid. Yet.” 

Harcourt shrugs her leather jacket on. “I’ll pick him up.”

Great - first he reveals to Peacemaker who he is and now Harcourt who he’s known for a hot minute is about to see his face too. 

You frown. “He’s gonna be really upset we know his identity.” 

“You wanna come and soften the blow?”

“I’ll drive.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Harcourt sits in the passenger seat of your car outside of the Evergreen Police Department. You’ve been sitting here quietly in the dark, staring at the front doors for almost an hour.

“So what’s your deal with Vigilante?” She asks, finally breaking the silence.

“I told you - I threw some contract work his way. Used him as a bodyguard from time to time when I needed the extra muscle.”

“And then what? Why did you call him an asshole?”

“Because he can be an asshole.” 

“That doesn’t sound right. A psychopath maybe. But an asshole? I don’t buy it.”

You keep your eyes focused on the police station door to hide your face. “He doesn’t mean to be an asshole.” You swallow with difficulty. “He just has a code. Lots of quirky little rules he has to follow that makes it difficult for someone ordinary like me to be - I mean, to work with him.”

“Like not revealing his secret identity.”

It’s not a question but you nod all the same.

“So this is your first time seeing him without his mask?”

“That he knows of.” Your forehead touches the cool glass window. It’s like if you stare hard enough at the door he’ll appear in one piece. “I had to do my background checks.”

The doors open and you see Adrian Chase in his cardigan and jeans walking out into the dark night, illuminated by the fluorescent streetlights.

He’s alive.

You roll down your window and he stops dead. He stares at you in shock with his lips parted slightly - unsure whether you recognise him or not.

Harcourt stretches across your seat and calls to Adrian. “We’re here to take you home. Get in.”

When he climbs into the back seat of your car you both turn in your seats. You breathe a sigh of relief seeing him up close - physically he’s unscathed.

“He’s still alive…” He says. “I’m Adrian.”

“Okay,” Harcourt says simply.

“I’m glad you’re not hurt,” you tell him.

He looks up at both of you sadly over his wire-rimmed glasses. “I think I might have made things worse.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After you drop Harcourt off at her motel, Adrian gets into the passenger seat. You let him give directions to his apartment, even though you already know where he lives.

“This is me,” he says when you pull up to his building and park in the spot you’ve parked in on countless occasions.

“I know.”

“Right. Yeah, you’ve been here.”

“A couple of times, yeah…”

His stupid code. You could know where he lives but never see his face. And now you can’t stop yourself from drinking him in - his slightly stubbly chin from his day spent in prison, the way his curly hair is all messed up. He groans heavily and leans his head back against the headrest. “I’m sorry,” he says quietly.

“The guys know how you ended up in jail - they don’t blame you.” He doesn’t say anything. You search his face as he stares gloomily ahead. “What happened in there, V?” you ask.

“I tried to provoke Peacemaker’s dad into a fight. It worked at first - the Aryans took the bait but his dad saw right through it. I think I’ve fucked up the whole mission.”

So Vigilante went into a viper pit unarmed and provoked a bunch of nazis into fighting him.

Deep down, you know it’s fucked up to be attracted to someone capable of such violence but if you’re honest with yourself, it’s what drew you to him in the first place. You knew about the headlines before you met him. And the idea of him taking on a dangerous prison gang really shouldn’t make your heart pound the way it is right now.

You take a deep, steadying breath. “You don’t have to be sorry about that.”

You’ve never touched his hair before but you want to stroke it and comfort him. Tell him that it wasn’t his fault and it’ll all be okay. But he interrupts your train of thought before you can reach your hand out. 

“I meant I’m sorry about us.”

Why is your first instinct to tell him that it’s no big deal that he broke your heart? Stupidly, you want to protect him from it - from the hurt he caused you. Comfort him, put his feelings before your own just because you can tell that right now he needs it.

But it is a big deal. 

As soon as you remind yourself he couldn’t trust you enough to let you in, it feels like your heart is shattering all over again, mourning what you could have had.

Trust.

“I told the team your name so they could bail you out,” you admit, desperate to get the fact that you betrayed him off your chest. “I was worried about you locked up in there.”

He turns his head to look at you properly for the first time all night. The streetlights are reflected in his dorky little glasses.

“You knew my name?” He doesn’t look betrayed - he just looks surprised. “How…?”

You lift your finger from the steering wheel to point at his apartment. “Anyone with your address could find out who you are. And your full name appears on my checking account when you cash the checks I write you.”

“So you know… everything?”

“Yup.”

His eyebrows knit together in a plea. “Why didn’t you tell me before?” 

“I wanted you to tell me. I wanted you to want me to know.”

“Knowing my secret identity would put you at risk.”

“That bullshit and you know it, V. I don’t need you to protect me.”

“Yeah you do - that’s why you had me come with you on jobs.”

“I can handle myself.”

“Then why did you hire me?”

“I was curious about the man behind the headlines, I guess. Then I nearly went broke trying to spend time with you. Do you honestly think I wanted to give you a cut of my contracts for months? ”

He presses his palms into his eyes, pushing his glasses up out of the way and trying to make sense of it all.

“So those jobs were just you finding a reason to hang out?” He drags his hands down his face.

“Well, not at first. But then we started sleeping together after jobs and I wanted to keep doing that.”

“I would’ve wanted to be with you even without those jobs.”

“Oh yeah? You’d have taken me out on a date as Vigilante?” He opens his mouth to speak but closes it again - as if reconsidering whatever he was about to say. “After all that time you still didn’t trust me enough to take off your mask. The last time we saw each other I practically begged you to show me who you are. Then Peacemaker comes back in town and you - what? Just rip off your mask and spill the beans without a second thought?”

“I was being tortured by Goff-”

“The senator tortured you?”

“Well, the Butterfly who had taken over his body. But yeah. He - I mean she - ripped off my mask and tried to cut off my pinky toe. Peacemaker was just there.”

You feel sick thinking about him being tortured. Then you feel sick about feeling sick. It’s not just normal empathy. You want revenge. But you know you shouldn’t care this much. Not when you’ve been broken up for so long.

“Shit, V. That’s horrible.” 

“Besides, if I was gonna show someone my face it would have been you. Not Peacemaker.” He looks at you sadly. “I wish you hadn’t left.” 

“And I wish you had given me a reason to stay, V. I deserved someone who could trust me. And you… you deserved someone you could be yourself with. We couldn’t be that for each other.”

The hurt on your face is plain for him to see - there’s no point trying to hide it. 

“I do trust you. It’s just…” He hesitates. “You’re the only person I know who thought I was cool.”

“Adrian… that’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard.”

Adrian.

It’s the first time you’ve ever called him that and it makes Adrian’s heart leap. Like the two sides of him have finally met you. After all this time.

“It’s not. Everyone else who knows me as Adrian knows I’m a loser. And I thought if I told you I was a busboy with no friends, you’d think that too.”

“You have friends.”

“Yeah, right.”

“The guys in the video store? They were so worried about you in jail. They like you a lot.” He allows himself a small smile like he doesn’t really believe it. “And I…” You pause. How do you feel about Adrian? “I still think you’re cool.”

“You do?”

He looks at you like he can’t believe you’re actually saying the words he was afraid you’d never say.

“Of course I do. You’re still the masked Vigilante of Evergreen. And I’m just… ordinary.”

He scoffs in amazement. “You’re not ordinary - you’re like the smartest person I know. And you don’t need to hide behind a mask to do your job. 

“I’m not that smart.”

“I mean, you found out more about the butterflies than the US government.”

You bite your lip, trying not to smile. “Can I tell you something? And you won’t tell the rest of the team?”

“You can tell me anything.” 

“I didn’t know what butterflies were until today.” He looks extremely confused so you press on. “I met John in a dark web chatroom when I was researching the missing gorilla. And I thought you guys were looking for it too.”

He laughs. A merciless side-splitting laugh that doesn’t take your embarrassment into consideration at all. But it shows off his beautiful smile. And when you see it you can’t stop yourself from joining in too. It’s so ridiculous. You wanted to find the gorilla, and maybe get your PI business mentioned again in the local paper. Now you’ve been roped into saving the world with a black ops team and Vigilante.

You both try to regain your composure and stare at each other, catching your breath. He shakes his head, grinning.

Christ, look at him.

“I sometimes wondered if you wouldn’t remove your mask because you were just a bad kisser. I mean, I saw your mugshot so I already knew you were pretty.” You can’t help but tell him. You know the grainy photo on his record like the back of your hand but in person, he’s frankly gorgeous. 

“Thanks, I know.”

You laugh again. “And modest.”

“You think I fund being Vigilante on a busboy salary? I get a lot of tips.”

“It all makes sense now. The only thing that doesn’t make sense is why you don’t have a girlfriend.”

“Because she didn’t want to wait around for an idiot who wouldn’t even kiss her.”

You stare at each other in the shadowy silence for a few moments. 

“It’s late, we should both get some rest.”

“Wait, don’t go.” His hand touches your thigh and it feels like there’s an electric current buzzing between his hand and the fabric of your jeans. The atmosphere almost crackles, like lighting about to strike in the middle of a storm. It’s the first time he’s touched you since you walked out on him six months ago and never went back. “It’s super late, you should crash at mine.”

“If I come upstairs we both know what’s going to happen.”

He tilts his head and you watch dimples form as the corners of his mouth turn into a mischievous smile. “That’s kind of the idea.”

“A bad one. We need to work together.”

“When has fucking ever stopped us from completing a job?”

“It hasn’t. But when we stopped seeing each other… I was really cut up. I couldn’t concentrate on work for a while. It’s why I needed the reward for the gorilla so badly.”

“Then we just won’t stop this time.”

“Adrian… I’ve only just pulled myself together again. I’m not sure it’s the right thing to do.”

He removes his hand from your leg to unclip his seatbelt. 

“You’re right. I’m sorry.” Adrian gives you an apologetic look. 

You stare at his lips. They’re just there. His whole face is out in the open. And now his lips, and the rest of him, are about to leave your car and you never know when you’ll see him unmasked again. He opens the car door.

“Wait -”

He turns back around in his seat.

“Let me find out if you’re a bad kisser. At least I can tell myself I’m not missing out on anything if you are.”

“You’re gonna be so mad…” He cups your face and brushes your cheekbone with his thumb. “I’m a really good kisser.”

You smile and his lips meet yours. 

It’s nothing like you imagined.

When you had sex it always felt urgent, even dangerous, getting into bed with a masked cape who was wanted for murder. More often than not he fucked you from behind, tugged fistfuls of your hair and slapped your ass. 

But his kisses… his kisses are soft and slow. And good.

You’re totally screwed.

He sucks your lip gently and then his tongue traces across yours. You urge yourself forward in the driver’s seat closer to him, bringing your hand up to cradle the nape of his neck and lace your hand in his soft hair.

Warmth spreads in your chest when he deepens the kiss. You secretly hoped he’d be like this when he was unmasked. Your hot and rough encounters were always fun but in your heart you always wanted him to want you like this. Deeply. Reverently. 

You break apart and press your forehead against his with your eyes closed, feeling your heart hammering against your chest.

“What’s the verdict?” he asks.

You open your eyes to see his green ones searching yours from behind his glasses. He lets out a long, happy exhale when he hears your seatbelt unclick.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Adrian’s bedroom is neat, clean, with framed vintage comic books on his walls and illuminated by a lava lamp on his bedside table. Details you remember from previous visits but barely register this time as you both burst through his bedroom door while he kisses you. Refusing to take his hands from your body, he kicks the door shut behind him forgetting about his injured foot. He regrets it immediately.

“Fuck!” He pulls away and winces.

“Careful,” you soothe, shrugging your jacket off onto the floor and he lifts your shirt off. As soon as your skin is uncovered his mouth finds it. He drags his tongue across your collarbones and between your breasts, nudging the cup of your bra aside so he can find your nipple.

His warm mouth feels almost too good to be true as he sucks on the hard, pebbled skin and moves on to taste every inch of your exposed chest, his deft hands unhooking your bra and tossing it aside quickly. 

The entire day could have been a crazy fever dream. You’ve gone from your heart sinking at the very sight of him to it fluttering like crazy as you lie back on his mattress so he can pull your jeans and underwear off.

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful,” he says, sinking to his knees between your legs at the edge of the bed.

Even though you’re completely naked on his bed while he’s still dressed, you somehow feel less on display than he is right now without his mask. It feels taboo watching his jaw muscles tighten as he works his mouth all over your inner thighs. There’s something so controlled about the way he meticulously kisses the sensitive skin at the crux of your thigh that makes your lip quiver. 

You’ve spent enough time around his quick reflexes to know Vigilante is going to be skilled at eating you out but sometimes, especially in the depths of your despair during your breakup, there was a niggling inkling at the back of your mind that the mask might just be a convenient excuse not to. 

You had suspected, or maybe even hoped, when you hooked up that he had come really, really close to rolling up the bottom half of his mask and tasting you. More than once, you had caught a fleeting glimpse of him at odds with himself, his eyes behind his visor staring at your pussy and his neck muscles contracting as he swallowed thickly, strengthening his resolve and deciding to protect his own identity instead.

But tonight - finally - his tongue slides between your folds and you let out a low whine when the furnace-hot heat of his mouth besets itself over your clit.

Adrian groans when he tastes your arousal flooding his mouth. His hands cup under your ass as he pulls himself closer. You dare yourself to run your hand through his hair again, your fingernails lightly scratching his scalp. It still feels like it shouldn’t be allowed but he doesn’t seem to mind at all as his lips suck on your swollen clit.

“Fuck, Adrian…” His real name still sounds foreign on your lips, like you have to make a conscious effort to say it. 

Adrian looks up at you over his glasses, his pupils wide in the dim violet light of the lava-lamp-lit room. He takes in your glowing face and chest as you lie propped up on your elbows, enjoying the sight of him on the floor between your legs.

His fingers knead the soft, pillowy flesh of your ass like he doesn’t want to let you go anywhere ever again. And you don’t want to. Fuck the mission. Can’t you just stay here forever? In Adrian’s bedroom, panting while his tongue runs firm circles over your clit.

When you roll your hips in encouragement, he lets out a soft little moan sending vibrations over the bundle of nerves - it almost makes you dissolve right there and then. 

“I can’t believe I let you… fuck - let you get away with not doing this before,” you whimper. “So - s’fucking good, V.”

“Adrian,” he says and the tiniest absence of friction when his tongue leaves your clit makes your fingers tighten in his hair, urging him to return to your aching pussy.

“Adrianadrianadrian,” you babble, scared that his lips will leave you again. No more V. No more Vigilante. Just Adrian. Here. Eating your pussy like it’s you who’d been depriving him of this for months on end. Pleasure rises deep in your core like the tide getting ready to crash against the cliff face.

Your brain becomes fuzzy as increasingly desperate noises escape your throat - something strangled between a whine and his name. You squirm against his tongue as he relentlessly continues, determined to draw from you the orgasm that you’ve been desperate for since he kissed you in the car and you realised his mouth would feel like heaven.

The pressure of his tongue against your soaking wet pussy makes you writhe in exhilaration. You barely notice his fingers digging harder into your skin as you arch your spine and throw your head back.

Your thigh muscles tense and relax, trembling on either side of his face. “Adrian, I’m gonna - gonna cum…”

Instead of responding, he sinks two fingers deep inside your cunt, giving you something to squeeze around as every muscle in your pelvis tightens. He curls his fingers slightly and it’s just enough to push you over the fucking edge.

The purplish glow of the room turns blinding white as waves, hot and wet, break over you and your body floods with ecstasy. Your whole lower body stiffens as your walls clench around his fingers and you grind your pussy against his mouth.

Fuck, you’ve been missing out. You haven’t been with anyone else the entire time you’ve been apart and it’s like your body has been crying for exactly this moment without you realising how much you needed it. Needed his mouth on you.

The room comes into focus again gradually as Adrian gives you a last few slow, gentle kisses before sliding his fingers out of your still-twitching centre.

You breathe heavily and look at him kneeling on the floor.

He looks stupidly pleased with himself, the corner of his wet, glistening mouth upturned in a self-congratulatory smile at the way he’s taken you apart piece by piece. You can’t help but giggle from endorphins buzzing through your body. It makes your abdomen hurt from all the tensing you were doing. 

Adrian slaps the side of your ass and gets to his feet, undoing his belt buckle. “C’mon, bend over,” he grins.

You sit up, shake your head and smile. “Nuh-uh, I wanna see your pretty face when you cum.” He blinks a couple of times dazedly. “Did you forget about your mask for a second?”

Adrian clears his throat. “Uh...No?”

He so did.

“C’mere.” You hook your fingers through his belt loops and pull him closer. You kiss the light trail of hair covering his hard abdomen while your fingers work to undo his jeans and pull them down to release him from the confines of his boxers.

God, you missed it. He has a pretty face alright but his cock is fucking perfect.

Your cheeks grow hot feeling him so close. You grip his hard length and draw your tongue across the tip, tasting the salty bead of precum. 

“Take your top off,” you say, looking up at him before running your tongue along his shaft, keeping eye contact.

He grips the hem of his t-shirt and pulls it off over his head. Seeing him in the purple glow, every contour of his sculpted abdomen illuminated sends burning heat to your pelvis. You never thought you were into muscular guys, not until you saw Vigilante take his suit off for the first time. Now you’re not sure if you could go back to anything else. Anyone else. 

You swirl your tongue around the head of his cock but he interrupts you.

“I need to fuck you. Please.”

At this point, you’re so turned on it’s an offer you can’t refuse. You release him and scoot back on the bed. He goes to crawl on top of you but flinches when his injured foot meets the mattress.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, I just need to - ah fuck.”

“It’s okay. Here, lie down. Let me go on top.”

He does so with relief and you swing your leg over his thighs.

“Better?” 

“Fuck yeah,” he says, looking at your naked figure sitting on top of him.

You reach into his bedside drawer where you know he keeps his condoms. Your fingers skirt over what you suspect are bags of candy until you find the corrugated square shape you’re looking for. You take it out and roll the condom on him.

“Okay, easy,” you say, positioning the head of his cock at your entrance. He throbs under the grip of your hand in anticipation. “Don’t overexert yourself.”

“You were totally cool with me over-exerting myself on the floor a second ago.”

“I was talking to myself,” you smirk. “It’s been a while.”

You ease yourself down onto his cock, feeling the beautiful stretch as you adjust to his size. 

“Shit…” he breathes, clamping his hands down hard on your hips, forcing you to bottom out. His eyebrows knit together and he sighs through parted lips, feeling the way your walls stretch around him. He looks so beautiful - you can’t stop looking at his lips.

You lean forward, planting your hands on either side of his head so you can lean down and kiss him. The taste of your juices registers on your tongue as his enters your mouth. You deepen the kiss and Adrian responds by jerking his hips up needily, pressing into your g-spot.

You moan and suck on his bottom lip, gently rolling it between your teeth as he pushes into the most sensitive part of your centre. Searing heat burns low in your belly, spreading to your thighs. You push yourself back up to ride him and grab his wrists, dragging them from your waist to grope at your chest.

“Fuck, you look so hot riding my dick.”

“Yeah? Rose-tinted visor isn’t all it’s cracked up to be?”

You’re teasing him but it seems to spur him on, as he squeezes your tits and jerks up into your bouncing hips. Every wet slap that meets your ears only increases your neediness for him. It burns brightly in your core, making you wetter and even more desperate for your next orgasm.

Every roll of your body sends his cock plunging into you, pushing against you at the perfect angle. God, he feels incredible. Your walls start to convulse around him, clamping down and gripping his cock as your second climax rears its head.

“Adrian, fuck, I’m close…” you plead, frantically chasing your high, wildly gyrating and bouncing in time with his thrusts.

“Say it again.”

“Fuck, I’m gonna-”

“No, say my name,” he says, through gritted teeth, his neck muscles tightening in the soft light. 

His neck.

“Fuck, Adrian.” You lunge forward and bite on his neck. He grabs handfuls of your ass, anchoring himself into you as he thrusts savagely upwards sending pleasure rocketing through you. Fuck he’s deep. So fucking deep.

His name leaves your lips over and over, broken and ragged as every jerk of his hip knocks the air out of your lungs. Bliss ignites and your cry of pleasure is muffled as you moan and run your tongue over his neck, smelling his aftershave mixed with his musky sweat. An explosion, more fierce than any grenade blast bursts through your centre as he pummels his cock with unparalleled force and precision, even as you squirm and shake, unable to keep moving your own hips in time with his.

With every ounce of strength you have you lean up on your arms to look at his face. His eyes are squeezed shut and his facial muscles contort as he sucks through his teeth.

“Cum for me, Adrian,” you murmur sweetly in his ear and he opens his eyes, giving you a terminally helpless look as he slams his hips into your hot, wet cunt and you squeeze around him as tight as you can. With a final thrust, you feel his thighs tighten and his cock pulsing inside you as he cums.

You flatten your body back on top of his - the warm, damp sweat between your chests feels strangely pleasant. His fingers trace circles up your spine, gently tickling your back. Adrian turns his head to kiss you and you both lie for a moment, enjoying the feeling of his lips on yours.

After what feels like a long time of lying in quiet elation, you make yourself climb carefully off of him and roll over, resting back on his pillows.

“Don’t go anywhere,” he says and you lie back watching him dispose of the condom, taking care not to put any pressure on his bandaged toe. He launches himself back on the bed with a thud making you bounce on the mattress. “Good, you’re still here,” he says, leaning on his elbow and looking down at you.

“Where else would I be?” you laugh.

“Well… you usually leave right after. Except that one time I accidentally bought peanut M&Ms.”

You look at him apologetically. In fairness, the mask was hardly an invitation to spend the night - what was he going to do? Sleep in it? “Do you have peanut M&Ms?”

He nods to his bedside drawer and you open it to see that it’s stuffed with the little yellow bags.

“You like peanut M&Ms now?”

He pulls a face. “No way dude, they’re so gross.”

“Then why…?”

“I guess I always hoped you might change your mind and come back. So I bought them whenever I thought about you.”

You look at the drawer - there’s practically enough that Adrian could have made a trail of peanut M&Ms from your apartment across town to his. “You would have made a really sweet boyfriend,” you sigh.

“Well, I mean… I still could,” he says in a would-be nonchalant type of way, pushing up his glasses with his finger and avoiding your gaze.

“Yeah?” You weren’t sure if he’d be open to picking up where you left off. But it feels right when it didn’t before. Now you know him. Really know him. 

He pulls his eyes up and meets your gaze with a smile. “If you want me to?”

“I’d like that. A lot.”

“Sweet,” he says with a wide smile, not bothering to hide how giddy he is.

You open the packet. “For the record, I’m not just staying because of the M&Ms this time.”

“I know.”

“And I’m glad you’re on the team.”

He nods happily, watching you pop a few into your mouth. “Hashtag me too.”

[captainpirateface]

Happy Birthday my Love.

I cannot stress how profoundly you have changed my life for the better.

You my Dear, (prepare the cheese) gave me my "Storybook Love".

Yes, we all know Sheri is the dude, and I am clearly the Chick.

I'm forever enamored by your tender beauty and your kindnesses, especially when I'm the recipient of so very much of them. Your bravery to pursue positive change in yourself, and finally believing that you deserve to be loved as much as you think I deserve the same.

I've found my P.I.C. fo' life.

My homey for life.

My best friend.

My passionate lover.

My concerned caregiver.

My absolute Soul mate.

And one day, after they finish "Six Million Dollar Man-ing" me, I will make a proper lady of you (😉😆) and make you my wife.

Getting rid of that Silly last name forever...

I love you with all that I am Babu.

We are destiny manifest.

We are the eternal lovers.

You are...

My Sunshine.

Love, John boy