#joat update

[capnhanbers]

It's Me

Chapter 141 of Jack of All Trades!

also known as The Real Slim Shady

[onlydrawnbad]

Do you ever read 570,000+ word, 130+ chapter fanfics that were started nearly 8 years ago and have current year updates, and as you get to the end of certain chapters along the way, you keep going "wow, I would have hated to be here in 201x and have to wait for THAT cliffhanger, those poor readers, those sad, desperate historical souls" and you're just so glad for yourself because you know you don't have to stop until chapter 139, and you arrogantly assume that's probably just extended epilogues or something (because you were previously conditioned by another fic to believe that), so everything will be fine?

Only to get to chapter 139 and SCREAM OUT LOUD because you jinxed yourself right into THE NEWEST WAVE OF CLIMATIC PLOT CHAPTERS WHERE ALL THE SHIT IS GOING DOWN and now you, too, have become the reader you felt such pity for?

Wait, you don't?

THEN GO OVER THERE AND DO WHAT I DID SO I DON'T HAVE TO BE ALONE IN MY HUBRIS. It comes with art. So. Much. Wonderful. Comic. Art.

I would like to stress (as I have done before) that I have never played this game. Not once. I had never even heard of it originally. Yet this is now the second absolutely massive Sans x reader/OC fic I have read in this fandom. Everything I know about Undertale, I learned because one day on a whim I decided to read a 480,000+ word, 170+ chapter fanfic because I liked the way @tricktster used words on some tumblr post (don't ask me which one, I've forgotten). I have re-read that fic at least once a year, if not more, for multiple years in a row because it's like a favorite book to me now.

If anyone needs me, I'll be comfort-reading it, again.

And then probably going back and re-reading JoAT, because oh my god that fic. I'm just so in love with it for a million reasons.

(Yes, it took me this long to see there was another glorious treasure in plain sight under @capnhanbers despite following @mod2amaryllis and it's just really embarrassing to be confronted by that kind of obliviousness, okay? Can I blame it on how, multiple times now over the years, I've gone months and months without looking at this app unless it notified me of something specific?)

I swear, I have never read fic in any other fandom where it was this easy to immerse myself in it with nothing more than some light googling along the way (the first time with CoBC), and the googling was just because I'm me and I like to know all the things. In both cases, you don't have to come to the table with anything other than an interest in supernatural-elements stories (monsters, magic, etc) and a love for snappy dialogue and funny (dad) jokes and HEART-WRENCHING FEELS and watching the author having a life journey in the notes.

(And yes, sure, an open mind about a skeleton monster and a human having magical sex, but if you know you're in a rated fic about monsters and humans, you must know that's going to be a thing.)

[cmweller]

Challenge #03641-I353: Communication Barrier

They cannot speak Galactic Standard or Galactic Simple, the translator is broken. Fortunately, the human has learned to speak, and understand, their whistling language. -- Anon Guest

Translator units were never entirely reliable. It was why most of the Alliance relied upon JOATS, polyglots, and stunt linguists to assist in negotiations. Make no mistake, translator units do an excellent job of translating the words. However... idioms, slang, and cultural references often slip through the cracks.

Translation software is always updating in an attempt to keep the metaphorical finger on the pulse of ever-changing language.

And then there's the Rennijym. A species of Avian Havenworlder who communicate exclusively in clicks and whistles. Most species can at least imitate the sounds necessary to handle GalSimple, even with some difficulty, but the Rennijym are not made that way.

[Check the source for the rest of the story]

[internutter]

Challenge #03641-I353: Communication Barrier

They cannot speak Galactic Standard or Galactic Simple, the translator is broken. Fortunately, the human has learned to speak, and understand, their whistling language. -- Anon Guest

Translator units were never entirely reliable. It was why most of the Alliance relied upon JOATS, polyglots, and stunt linguists to assist in negotiations. Make no mistake, translator units do an excellent job of translating the words. However... idioms, slang, and cultural references often slip through the cracks.

Translation software is always updating in an attempt to keep the metaphorical finger on the pulse of ever-changing language.

And then there's the Rennijym. A species of Avian Havenworlder who communicate exclusively in clicks and whistles. Most species can at least imitate the sounds necessary to handle GalSimple, even with some difficulty, but the Rennijym are not made that way.

[Check the source for the rest of the story]

[mod2amaryllis]

real life thing. so the whole time I've been married we've planned and saved for a trip to Japan. due to many personal factors, it took 5 years for us to get to a point where we could go. that trip was originally scheduled for

April of 2020.

the plane tickets were expensive so all this time we've just been pushing out flights and crossing our fingers. for 2.5 years. well, at last, Japan has opened, and our current flight dates made the cut by THREE. DAYS.

this is all to say it's such a relief, i feel hugely lucky, but also i have less than three weeks to plan an international vacay so if you see less of me, well!!! das why!!!!!

[melonbread96]

How does J feel about your D. I. D? Also why hasn't she been posting,? And do you both text each other still? I hope you both not having problems and wish both a good day.

💚 I was honestly scared about her knowing about it, and didn't tell her until a year of dating. I actually confessed on our one year anniversary, and J was so supportive and accepting. I'm so lucky to have her. ❤

She hasn't been posting, because she's been in and out of the hospital. Her health comes first above anything else. When I first dated her, I knew she had anemia, though now she's learned she's vitamin deficient. This can be very dangerous, so she has to take extra measures and monitor what she eats. She's also not doing well mentally, and needs this time to heal.

I haven't been messaging her. Instead her brother Joat has kept me updated on her health, and has been taking care of her. Either it be taking her to the hospital, or taking care of her at home. He tells me what he can, and I'm very grateful for that.

I do really miss and love her. I haven't really spoken to her since Christmas, and it saddens me that she isn't around, but I truly understand. What she needs comes before anything else, and I really hope she gets better soon.

~Melon

[thecozywhaleshark]

I was literally just looking on your page earlier today checking for an update for King Of Hearts, but there wasn't one. But just now, scrolling through the feed, I saw you had posted Part 9! Omg I'm so happy! I absolutely love this series!!! Thanks so much for the update!!

Lmao Happy New Year my beans!! I know it took me a little while to write, but I was happy to be able to get it up today 💗💗

Now to go bang my head against a wall over JOAT 😂

[missouris-googlehistory]

A change of hearts | chapter VIII

A/N: I am so sorry I haven't updated this story in so long, I've been dealing with school and depression honestly. Sorry if everything isn't super politically correct I am not European so I am a bit stupid on their political happenings. This isn't meant to be offensive to anyone.

-----------------------------------------------------

For a long time things had been going well between Ludwig and Francis. Their relationship blossomed and Germany eventually proposed, with France happily accepting the offer. However they knew there were challenges ahead. The first obstacle was their fellow nations.   

"ABSOLUTELY NOT! FRANCE HOW COULD YOU!?" Was the first response exclaimed after Germany formally made the announcement at a world meeting. The other nations were equally as confused and disgruntled with the match. England marched right up to the German, "YOU BRAINWASHED HIM OR SOMETHING DIDN'T YOU!?". Ludwig, offended by such a notion retorted. 

"Of course not." In a polite yet stern tone, 

"Angleterre that's rude of you to suggest! Even for a connard like you!" Francis stood up to defend his partner. 

"OH I'M BEING RUDE FOR TERRORIZING YOU!? THE MAN THAT HELD YOU PRISONER? THE ONE WHO DESTROYED NOT ONLY YOUR COUNTRY BUT COUNTLESS OTHERS!?" Germany immediately left the room, sensing that he wasn't wanted. A fist fight broke out as perusal between the two nations while the others pondered and discussed the proposal. 

Italy and Japan had followed Germany to make sure he was ok, the waves of guilt hit him all over again. "Maybe Britain's right, maybe France just pities me...maybe I never deserve a second chance or love at all..." He put his head in his hand. 

Italy rubbed his back, "That's not true at all! Everyone deserves love and kindness! Japan and I love you!" Japan nodded in agreement. Prussia who was peering a nearby window saw Germany's sad face. 

He banged on the glass. "Who made you cry like a little baby!? That's totally unawesome!" 

"Just go away Prussia, I want to be left alone." As he muttered the phrase America popped out of the doorway. 

"Yo Germany dude we need a little help in here!" 

"Huh?" The Axis trio went back inside to see France and England on the floor while America tried to separate them. 

"FRANCE DUDE LET GO YOU'LL KILL THE OLD MAN!" 

"YOU DID IT! YOU KILLED HER! I COULD FORGIVE GERMANY A THOUSAND TIMES OVER BUT I WILL NEVER FORGET WHAT YOU DID YOU BASTARD!" England was turning blue in the face, 

"That was six hundred years ago you crazy frog!" 

"Frankreich! Ludwig wrapped his arms around the Frenchman's waste and pried him off. Arthur finally stood up and recovered, the others starring at the scene. Ludwig was holding Francis and whispering "it's ok" to help calm him. 

"Let's go back to the hotel so we can all calm down." The German suggested. 

"Why?" England snapped back, "You two can leave the rest of us will continue the meeting."

Ludwig was not one for bragging but Arthur was getting on his nerves, he growled and snapped back, "How are you going to hold a meeting without the two most powerful European nations? You can't talk about the European Union issues anymore since you backed out like eine Muschi!" The room fell silent, Ludwig was not to curse in a formal setting. Arthur stepped back a bit. 

"Well at least let us discuss this 'engagement' of yours." 

"There's nothing to discuss!" 

"We're nations we can't just marry whoever we please!" 

"Oh for Gott's sake do you watch T.V? Or do you not own one because you're so old. I've never seen two world leaders have more sexual tension unless you count Churchill and Roosevelt." 

To which Arthur and Alfred yelled. "HEY!" 

Francis sniffled and looked up at Ludwig. "Allemange it's fine don't worry. Can we just go back? The two of us?" 

Ludwig sighed in defeat, "Fine." The two men gathered their things and left the world to decide their fate.



Back at the hotel they tried to relax, Ludwig poured himself a drink. "Why do you always attack England?"

Francis chuckled and laid on the bed. "Because Mon cher, he is a dick."

"And I'm not?"

"Oui but a cute one."

"Ja but why am I more deserving of forgiveness than him?"

"He killed the love of my life. My very soul was crushed. Not to mention all the other dickish things he did. I know he gave me the plague."

"The plague spread everywhere Liebling."

"Oui but he started it."

"Whatever you say." Ludwig took another swig of his drink



Back at the world meeting it seemed more like a riot than anything else.

"I don't see the big deal dudes, being gay is gay. Who cares? I don't."

"It's not a matter of gay or not, at least not in most countries; it's a matter of alliances." England tried to school the American in politics.

"Oh yea cuz you and France are best friends. Who would marry Germany for the sake of an alliance anyway?" Again the room fell silent. Italy almost raised his hand however his brother smacked it down.

"I don't think it's really fair to pick on the guy eh?" Spain retorted. "Germany mentioned it himself, their bosses get along really well. They old the European Union together Si?" On this most everyone could agree. "Heck I was married to Austria for awhile, it wasn't that bad!" To this the Austrian flushed in embarrassment; Hungary twitched ever so slightly. However the room filled with laughter.

"He is still a person and should be treated as such." Belgium spoke up, which was a surprise to many of the nations. "The world needed justice for what he had done and it was served. Most of our people have moved on and don't even remember the war. His punishment was paid. Even if we don't like to think about it he suffers too."

"Belgium...can you really forgive him?" England asked with concern and shock. Poland was still very angry and made it very clear to the rest of the world. Many other countries had done the same. Yet Belgium and France were different.

"At first I really didn't want to. During one of my visits to France's house we shared what had happened to each other...He told me about how he forgave Germany because you should not live with that kind of hatred towards another human in your heart." 

"Well France is Catholic, you don't have to share his beliefs Belgium, you're lucky he didn't get you pregnant. You have every right not to forgive him, just like Poland." England tried to rationalize her anger, Poland agreed with him as well as a few other nations.  

"Joat but living the rest of my life being angry at my neighbor who I have to see a lot isn't helpful to anyone. Especially me, we aren't humans. We make sacrifices. You and France don't get along well but you still work with each other. Germany still works with Russia after all he's done." Suddenly the energy in the room shifted; It became dark and ominous as everyone turned to the innocent looking nation. "And America."  She quickly added and began to retell the story of the Berlin wall and all that Germany and his people had suffered. "We need to lay this to rest; Maybe their marriage is the best answer. Maybe we can all find some kind of happiness in this. We shouldn't deny him happiness when he's grown so much as a person." 

"Ja, I agree for once." The focus shifted to Austria. "He isn't the only one to blame, and it isn't like we haven't done bad things to each other before. The Napoleon wars were a mess. England killed Joan of arc, and conquered a lot more of the world than he ever did. Belgium had issues with the Congo, Hungary and I had issues with the Serbians," Though he would never publicly admit he was the cause of the first world war. 

"Will their marriage be like most peoples or is it like ours?" Lithuania piped up. "Because they're two guys and we've had arranged negations with two guys before but this isn't for legal reasons, so like...what about the countries who still...don't recognize that stuff?" The focus was again negatively drawn back to Russia and many of the eastern European countries, the Asian nations watched in silence.  

"WELL THEN FUCK THEM DUDE AM I RIGHT!?"  America very loudly interjected the awkward silence. "We basically said their bosses want some kind of weird alliance thingy so whatever! I say we let them be happy! If Francy-pants likes sausage dude why do we have to tell him what's wrong or right?  Like Emma said we're not mortal and unfortunately we all gotta get along whether we like it or not. Yea to us it might feel like it was just yesterday but to the rest of the world it's history, and our pain eventually goes away. I'm not mad at Britain dude for being a giant douche. I got a cool holiday to celebrate! I get to piss him off!" 

"WHY YOU-" England was cut off by laughter. No one really dare to go up against the loud mouthed American, at this point not even Russia cared anymore about the German-Franco union. The meeting was quickly adjourned afterwards and everyone went back to the hotel. 

Luckily the two were met with love and support, everyone decided to go out and party a little since Germany did announce they were now formally engaged. It was cause for celebration, to forgiveness, happiness and a new beginning for everyone. 

Translations: 

1. Frankreich: France - German 

2. Eine Muschi: A female body part - German 

3. Allemagne: Germany - French

4. Mon Cher: My love - French

5. Leibling: Love - German 

5. Joat: Yes - Western Flemish 

[raffapumpum]

Anchored ⚓

What makes you stable when you're being tossed from all sides.

Hebrews 6:18-20 So God has given both his promise and his oath. These two things are unchangeable because it is impossible for God to lie. Therefore, we who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us. This hope is a strong and trustworthy anchor for our souls. It leads us through the curtain into God's inner sanctuary. Jesus has already gone in there for us. He has become our eternal High Priest in the order of Melchizedek.

Today, I felt shaken. I wanted to ignore news and updates locally as well as internationally but I failed to do again. It has been my habit to update myself about breaking news everyday because of its demand in my work. I need to know the updates for me to discuss with my student. Since the pandemic broke out, most of the news I've been hearing are mostly negative. Today, we aren't just dealing with Covid19 but with all the feeds poppoing up about the lootings in America, arguments in  the church, backlashes to the influencers, killing of a pregnant elephant, economic recession and so many more!! I kinda feel tired a little extra today because there is just too much to take in. I feel shaken and discouraged. I feel like I am already in tribulation. There is so much chaos, violence, backlashing and arguments. We never try to agree to disagree,never compromising and so little kindness towards people with different attributes, opinion and race than ours. It is very tiresome to be honest. I am finding my heart crying out inaudibly and begging God to just stop everything because it just too much. 

Until God showed me a picture of a small boat being tossed by strong winds  and gigantic waves from all sides. The storm is getting stronger and it seems the boat can't make it. Little did I realize that even the joat has been tossed and turned, it still doesn't budge or being carried by the waves. It was just there placed in same area. God showed me the anchor of the boat solid and still. It makes the boat stable and remain in its place. It wasn't carried by the strong current but it is being held strong by the anchor. Then I remember Hebrews 6, the bible stated that our anchor is Jesus. As long as we remain connected with our Anchor, we are stable and immovable. We might be shaken but we will never be carried away nor be destroyed. It was a great comfort for me today when Jesus showed me this picture assuring me that I have peace, assurance and stability as long as I remain in Him. He truly is the Prince of Peace and my Jesus knows what exactly to tell me in this time to shakening.

Jesus,thank you that you are getting rid of all the anxiety and uncertainty in my heart. I thank you as well because you know tge right Words to say to calm my storms. Thank you that you are my anchor and with you I won't be carried away. Thank you for the peace that passes all understanding. Help me to be more like you who can sleep soundly in the midst of storm knowing that Father got me. I love you my Anchor,my King,my great love. goodnight!

[gettingdiceystats]

Character Class Update: Level 2

Soon after the group’s completion of Act 1, they were awarded their first level-up! But what does this mean? Let’s break it down. 

LORROS

For our resident Barbarian, we have two updates to his features with “Reckless Attack” and “Danger Sense”. Both have merits in combat with one allowing him to gain advantage on strength-based weapons and the other allowing him advantage on DEX saves provided that he isn’t blinded, deafened or incapacitated. Next level, he’ll choose his Primal Path where Lorros will gain certain features during his Rage that can buff him or his allies.

SIGG

For our Fighter, we have the coveted “Action Surge” which is a staple to the versatile martial class. It allows him to take an additional Action for free once per rest. Pretty good, right? Well, you may not have known that Action Surge allows you to add your “Extra Attack” feature to the Action, as well. So at level 5, Sigg will be able to attack up to FOUR times on his turn if he were to Action Surge. And like our Barbarian, Sigg will be choosing his Martial Archetype next level which will only further his prowess on the field.

GILL

While our Bard doesn’t get more attacks or advantage on his rolls, he will be getting more spell slots. At level 2, Gill will have 3 level one spells slots to cast each long rest. And at each level, Gill can replace any spell he knows with another so long as he has the spell slot to cast it. But aside from that, he’ll receive two new features: “Jack of All Trades” and “Song of Rest”. JoAT allows Gill to add half his proficiency bonus (rounded down) to any and all ability check he doesn’t have proficiency with. And SoR allows him to give his resting allies an addition d6 during their short rest if they were to expend 1 or more hit dice. Gill will also be choosing his Bardic College next level which will provide bonuses to his Bardic Inspiration and flexibility as a caster and ally on the field.

MIRAQEN

While some of the others had to wait for their class archetypes, our Druid will be picking hers at this level. With Miraqen’s affinity for spellcasting, it wasn’t a surprise for her to choose the Circle of the Land. She gains an additional cantrip and “Natural Recovery”, a feature that allows her to regain spell slots on a short rest that have a combined value of equal half (or less) her Druid level. And more spell slots because why not (which can be prepared during a long rest, provided she has time to do so). However, she does receive one more feature which is “Wildshape” which allows her to take the form of Beasts she’s seen with a CR equal to or less than the one provided on her WS table. 

BARON

Similar to Miraqen, our Wizard chooses his School of Magic at level 2. For him, it will be the School of Necromancy which allows him to spend half the number of time and gold to copy a spell from a scroll or other medium to his own spellbook with “Necromancy Savant”. However, he also gains the feature, “Grim Harvest” which Baron can use once per turn allowing him to reap life from a creature he’s killed gaining 2 times spell level of hitpoints (3 times, if the spell came from the School of Necromancy). Aside from that, he gains one additional spell slot per long rest and he is able to re-prepare spells in his spellbook each long rest, provided he has ample time to do so.

And that’s it for level two! Let me know what you think and if I missed anything!

[monroekush]

THIS THURSDAY at 9:00pm EST 🎶 (INFINITE STARR LE FLAIR) @MONROEKUSH will be sitting down EXCLUSIVELY with The WORLD WIDE @FleetDJs to talk about Her new projects ‼️ WE BREAK RECORDS 💿 Follow @MonroeKush and the @FleetDJs Official Instagram page for exclusive updates and Tune-In to fleetdjradio.com this Thurs @ 9PM EST (log on, then click "Fleet DJ Radio" icon. #FleetDJs #HipHop #BreakingRecords #NewMaterial #Interview #fleetnation #networkwithfleetdjs #madeinbushwick @ms_echiacom . • • Call and Request Infinite Starr Le Flair "I'M OFF" at your local radio station and Tune-In to fleetdjradio.com this Thurs @ 9PM EST. "I'M OFF" Now featured on XM/Sirius Radio. 🙏🏽💪🏽😤 . • • "I'M OFF" now avail on all streaming services and digital stores. Search "Infinite Starr Le Flair" on your fav site/app. • • Welcome to the #ChampagneCampaign #IMOFF #InfiniteStarrLeFlair aka #MonroeKush StarrzUp 4 Life. #ForeverCBM #FOG #KJM #OMAT #JOAT #StarrGang #SaluteTheDJs

[capnhanbers]

So...THAT Just Happened

Chapter 140 of Jack of All Trades!

i'm backj! and. modder than ever!

[capnhanbers]

Don't Feed The Plant

Chapter 139 of Jack of All Trades!

LOOK OUT!!! HERE COMES FLOWEY 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[capnhanbers]

Rainbow Connection

Chapter 138 of Jack of All Trades!

it's a rock show and that's it!

[capnhanbers]

*squeak,,!*

Chapter 135 of Jack of All Trades!

at long freaking last oh my godddddddddddddddddd here here here take it

[capnhanbers]

Alright Party's Over

Chapter 137 of Jack of All Trades!

we've been having a lot of fun.