#jo goes to con

[sinofwriting]

Private Professor - Max Verstappen

Words: 5,576 Summary: For years and years, Max has claimed that he has a girlfriend, but no one has ever met her and he refuses to talk about her with the media. And it’s far easier to believe that he’s lying when no proof of a girl exists. Note(s)/Warning(s): Small Age Gap (Reader is nearly two years younger), Some Angst, Mostly Fluff, Jos Verstappen. Thank you so much to the anon that requested this! I had a lot of fun writing it!

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At fourteen and sixteen, their relationship is all blood rushing to their cheeks, fluttering hands, kisses that last too long and not long enough, panting breaths, and hickeys below shirt collars. It’s whispers of forever, of I’ll take you here and there. That house will be ours one day. Whatever you want, you’ll have. I’ll be on break, you’ll come home and I’ll be waiting. You’ll follow me everywhere and I’ll do the same.

It’s promises they don’t realize they shouldn’t be making but do. It’s sweet nothings and petty fights that last a day before they’re back in each other's arms. It’s pretending not to notice how his dad watches him amused as he walks calmly out of the door before sprinting over to her house and sneaking into her bedroom. It’s her parents pretending not to hear the thud of him falling into her bedroom and the light giggles their daughter makes.

At fourteen and sixteen, their relationship changes. It’s no longer seeing each other when he doesn’t have a race or training and is home, no Red Bull duties to be done. It’s long phone calls, texts, snapchat streaks, learning how to video call. It’s carrying two power banks with them everywhere and Max buying them both expensive phone cases that charge their phones. It’s falling asleep on the phone while the other is just beginning their day. He attends classes with her, while she listens to him train. He goes to red bull meetings and pretends not to have the light sound of breathing in his ears from her falling asleep while studying or doing her homework.

Fifteen and seventeen, brings them peace. She’s still studying like a mad woman at Harvard of all places, but he’s got an F1 seat of all things. He’s in F1. He suddenly has more things to do but more free time. When he’s not racing or at the factory or doing weird press things that make him want to rip his hair out, Jos is putting him on a plane to America, to her. And he soaks up all the time with her he can, despite it being filled with her studying, attending classes, and forcing actual food down her throat which her parents both thank him for.

It also brings the stupidest thing in the world; the doubt and disbelief that he has a girlfriend.

Carlos is the first to bring it up upon seeing his home screen that’s just all black, not even the default that iphone has.

“No girlfriend?” Max frowns at him, pocketing his phone and sending a glance over to where his father is standing and talking to his race engineer. “What?” “Your home screen, it’s all black. You don’t have a girlfriend?” Carlos is teasing, joking. The whole paddock already knows that Jos Verstappen wouldn’t let his son have a girlfriend, not now when he’s got an F1 seat. Such a thing would be a distraction and Max isn’t allowed those. Max isn’t allowed friends on the grid either. Carlos wonders though how much the last part is just a Jos thing. “I do.” Then he says her name, all soft and sweet in a way Carlos never thought Max could be. It’s nearly enough for him to believe Max, but then he catches a glimpse of Jos and shakes his head, clapping the seventeen year old on the back.

He is the first to not believe Max, but far from the last. It’s Daniel next, Christian, Esteban, Pierre, Sebastian, Lando, every interviewer that asks.

It doesn’t matter because at seventeen and nineteen, she gets her second degree and begins the nightmare of getting her doctorates in education and history. And he picks out a ring before making his father hide it away. And instead of him constantly flying to her, she’s flying to him. Hiding out in his Monaco apartment, turning his living room into a disaster zone as she spreads her things around to study.

The mess drives him crazy, but he doesn’t move anything no matter how much his hands itch to do so, instead just pressing a kiss to the top of her head before pressing himself in between her and the couch. Grinning when she sends him a look, a clear don’t be a distraction, before giving him a kiss.

His days in Monaco when she’s there are spent in the living room after training, playing fifa or watching some documentary for one of her classes with her, and poking at her lightly because he doesn’t know shit about history but he’s still able to remember countries quicker than her.

They turn eighteen and twenty and nearly get married when her family goes on vacation to Vegas, dragging the two along despite them not being able gamble, which is the only reason her parents had chosen Vegas. The only thing that stops them from getting married is him not being a US citizen and her visa just being for school. It’s a fucking wakeup call for him and he can’t help but pester her about places in Monaco to live.

She entertains it for all of five minutes before she’s cupping his face and kissing him. When she pulls back, she’s shaking her head. “As long as it has you and four bedrooms, I don’t care.” “Four?” “We’ll need our own offices and a guest room.”

It’s barely anything for the real estate agent to work with but he doesn’t care. He wants something that’s at least four bedrooms, two baths, a decent kitchen, and a view. She liked the Monaco sunrise and sunset and he planned on letting her be able to see it anytime they stayed in Monaco.

His agent gets back to him in a week and he ignores the look on Daniel’s face when he comes over for the first time. Ignores the jokes about it being too big for one person just like Daniel ignores him saying that he has a girlfriend.

“If you had one, I’d have seen a picture of her mate. The whole world would.”

Max still remembers the way his jaw had twitched at the thing everyone said. That if he had a girlfriend, they’d have seen a picture of her, that he’d be showing her off every second, have her at the races, been seen with her. When Max had made it abundantly clear that the worst part of driving was the media, the fame. So why would he ever subject someone he loves to that when they both weren’t ready for that?

Because they weren’t. He wasn’t ready for another part of his life, one of the most important parts, to be something for everyone to look at and dissect. And she wasn’t ready for it either. Not when she was doing so much studying. She barely felt like she had time for him, which he denied and hated vehemently, she didn’t have time for the online vitriol of being a girlfriend to a high profile athlete. And she didn’t need to be harassed as she attended classes and studies groups and such if someone recognized her and didn’t like that she was with him.

Not showing any pictures or videos of her was also easy for him. It wasn’t because he didn’t have any, he had hundreds. But they were pictures and videos of her, only meant for him. Not because they were dirty in nature, though some were, but because how she was in them was something only she allowed him to see. It was photos of her with a finger pressed to her top lip as she glared at her books, videos of her sitting on something too tall for her feet to touch the ground and letting them swing. It was her smiling at him, all fond, shy and in love.

It was them wrapped up in each other's arms and love. Her in between his legs or the other way around. Her sitting on his lap as Vic stole his phone to video them laughing and exchanging kisses. Her giggles as she tries not to fall asleep as reads her books to him over facetime. It’s her in her purest form and he doesn’t want the people in his life who are so quick and sure to not believe him to get to see that.

Nineteen and twenty-one, she officially co-owns their place in Monaco and he starts scouting out property in Belgium and land in France that’s somewhat close to the principality he lives in. It was too early to start building a house to live in forever, not when they weren’t sure what they wanted to live in forever with their kids, but it wasn’t too early to buy the land for it.

It also leads to their biggest fight in years.

“Max!” Her nails are digging into her arms. “I’m not saying that. I’m saying that I want to help, that I can pay. I have money!” “And you don’t need to!” He’s yelling as well, face red with anger. “I’ve got money too! You don’t need to pay for shit when I can.” She shakes her head. “Really? Is that how it's always going to be? I won’t ever get to pay for anything? Just have a salary and trust fund wasting away.” She scoffs, giving another shake of her head. “Is it about being the breadwinner? Because don’t worry Max, I’m well aware that you’ll always have more money than me. Doesn’t mean I can’t contribute to our life.” “Fuck.” He murmurs seeing the tears brimming in her eyes but not falling, the hurt in her words. “It’s not about that at all. It’s not about being the breadwinner.” “Then what is it about?” Her voice is high pitched. “You won’t let me pay for a single thing! I can’t buy groceries without you slipping money back into my wallet. I can’t help pay the bills and now you won’t let me help buy the land that will have our house on it. What is it about Max?” “You’re mine.” Her eyes widened at his quiet but firm tone. “You’re my girlfriend, the love of my life. One day my wife and the mother of my children.” He runs his tongue over his teeth, feeling words and feelings he’s only ever really let come out during sex or when they're both so drunk they barely remember anything the next day. “I want to pay for everything because it’s providing for you, it’s making sure you’re eating, sleeping somewhere safe, getting the best, most accommodating flights. It’s knowing that I’m providing for my family.”

“Max,” she breathes out, arms falling away from her chest and then she’s moving closer, resting a hand over his racing heart. “You want to provide for me?” He nods. “For our future kids?” “Yes.” “So do I. So, we’re going to work on this. You want to buy the land, you can.” He looks at her distrusting, because this didn’t sound like working on it. “But, I get to pay for groceries when I go out for them, without you paying me back. I get to pay for netflix because I use it more and spotify.” She adds. He frowns at her. “I don’t like it.” “Too bad and I’m not done. In return, you get to pay the bills, put gas in the car for me,” he grins at that. “Pay for my flights and we are going to open a joint account to put an equal amount of money in every month. For things like vacations, anniversary dinners, and the kids. Because it’s important that I get to help provide for them too. And when we build that house together, I want to pay at least half of the contracting fee. I’ll let you pay for the rest.” “I want to pay for any of the kids' interests. Like art, ballet or karting.” “No deal.” She shakes her head and he’s frowning again. “You can pay for all the karting, it will mean more. But I want it out of the shared account for the other things. Unless,” she pauses. “Unless,” he encourages. “If any of them decides to go to university early like me, I want to pay fully for it.” “No.” It’s quick and now she’s frowning as well. “It’s our children and their education. Shared account.” “Their first degree.” He shakes his head. “And if it’s their only degree?” Her brows press together, it was a good point. Just because they decided to go to university early like her didn’t mean they’d go for more than one degree. “First year.” His eyes narrow as he looks at her, but he nods. “First year. But only of the first degree.” “First degree only.” She agrees.

It’s quiet between them before Max lets his face soften, lips twisting slightly into a smile. “Are we done fighting?” She laughs, but nods. “Yeah. We’re done fighting.” “Thank god.” He breathes, pulling her into his arms and burying his face into the crook of her neck. “Let’s not do that again.” “Not anytime soon at least.” “I love you.” He murmurs. “I love you too.”

Twenty and twenty-two has their families asking when exactly they’re getting married, wondering why there isn’t a ring on her finger and their only saving grace is their time spent in Monaco together away from them all. But when it gets to be too much as pressure builds as she tries to finish her doctorate in education while still working on her doctorate for history, it’s Jos that steps in for her and Max.

The three of them shared a complicated relationship. She could never like him for the parent he was to Max growing up. From the near abuse he hurled at him when he failed, the pressure he put on a child, the leaving him in a foreign country for a few hours when he wasn’t even a teenager more than once. But she did love him, because Max loved him and in his own way he loved Max and he showed that with his support of their relationship when everyone expected for him to have a problem with it, label it as a distraction. And now as a few years had passed and Max was comfortable in his F1 seat, he was Max’s fiercest defender, unwilling to back down, but would if Max told him too. And he was her fiercest defender as well. Glaring at jokes about her not needing a degree with the money Max made, not forcing her to join on trips when she was busy with school or questioning her support of Max because she didn’t attend races.

So, neither Max or her are surprised when Jos steps in when her grandparents are trying to back them into a corner as to why she doesn’t have a ring on her finger and how they have a number for a wedding planner and she should really give her a call, when all they want is to get breakfast before retreating to their room so she can resume her studies while Max hovers around her while going over his own work.

She hadn’t been thrilled at first when she learned that Jos would join them on the trip, knowing that Sophie wouldn’t be there, but now she was grateful and she made sure to squeeze his shoulder before leaving the kitchen and scheduled a nice quiet dinner for herself, Max and Jos as thanks.

The media becomes relentless when they’re twenty-two and twenty-four and Max wins his first championship. Because there is no girlfriend in sight despite the now champions thanks for her support and love. They tear Max apart for creating a fake girlfriend that has no name or face, call him unloveable with his fake championship. Some tear her apart as well, calling her gold digger, selfish, undeserving, fans of Max and the sport do as well.

It was supposed to be a happy moment for him, one of if not the best in his life, but it’s tainted, ruined, and as soon as he’s home with her in Monaco, all she can do is hold him and pretend that the texts from his friends begging him to go out and get laid don’t make her cry later in the shower.

Despite the texts and a bold one from Daniel about hiring him a prostitute, she forces Max to go out, to celebrate with the drivers in Monaco, to get drunk and have fun, and forget what the media is saying about him.

“I’m coming back if one of them even hints at a prostitute.” He tells her and she laughs, but she knows that he’s serious. He’s never even once considered cheating on her and one of their first serious fights had been about her trying to convince him and herself that she’d be okay if he got lonely while he was traveling and needed someone. He hadn’t believed it for a second and it had been one of the few times he had been so pissed at her that he couldn’t even stomach to look at her.

“Am I making a mistake, mom?” She asks, barely five minutes later, not even bothering saying hi when her mom greets her over the phone. “No.” Her mom’s voice is firm and has her blinking away tears. “But,” “No.” Her mom cuts her off. “Sweetheart, I can’t even begin to try and understand Max and yours relationship. But this, this privacy that you two have, that’s not a mistake. It’s rough right now and it will be. And it will come back later when you two do decide to be public, but it’s not a mistake. You two both made the difficult, heartbreaking, mature decision to keep it private for both of yours sake.” “I know.” She whispers, wiping away tears. “You both still need privacy and there is no shame in that. Max isn’t ready and neither are you. As far as I’m concerned the only mistake you two have made is still not being married with a baby on the way.” “Mom.” She groans and her mom laughs. “I know, I know. Just remember that despite the seven or so years you’ve been together, that you two are still young, still doing so much growing.” “Thank you.” “Of course.”

When Max arrives home hours later, drunkenly stumbling around and into bed, she’s not surprised by the smell of liquor clinging to him or the drunken murmurings he’s pressing to her skin. She is surprised by the deep inhale he takes and the splutter that makes her turn to face him.

Eyes a little blurry from sleep and wine, she makes out squinted eyes, flushed face, and a frown.

“You’re drunk.” “You’re drunk.” She replies, curling closer to him. “You’ve been crying.” “Yeah.” He slips an arm around her, pulling her closer. “We’re going to feel like shit when we wake up.” “Yeah.” He chuckles, brushing lips over her forehead. “That bad?” “That bad.” She nods.

At twenty-three and twenty-four, the itch that Max has had since he was nineteen, one that’s grown worse and worse as the years have gone by, is too persistent and he takes a quick trip to his fathers house the day after she turns twenty-three and returns with a ring and the promises they made at fourteen and sixteen, promising them all over again, as she stares at him with a smile and teary eyes.

“I’d be stupid to not want to marry you Max.” She tells him when he slips the ring on her finger, breathing a sigh of relief when it goes on, fitting perfectly. “You’re going to marry me.” She nods, giggling at his blown pupils and silly grin. “Yes, I am.”

It seems stupid to be so giggly and flustered about it, so love sick, when they’ve talked about it so much. About getting married, about houses, kids, life after racing and teaching. But it’s different with the ring on her finger. Not more real or tangible. Just more.

“I know I proposed early.” She shakes her head, wrapping her arms around his neck and his arms eagerly wrap around her waist. “It’s perfect. I know we talked and had plans, but this is perfect. Besides, I’ve got news of my own that’s early.” “Oh?” Max’s eyebrow raises and he knows it’s not possible, not really with her religious use of the birth control shot and the way they mainly use condoms, more for convenience than anything else, but his eyes drift down to her abdomen that’s exposed. There’s no difference, but he can imagine what it would look like, he can also imagine what it will look like in a few hours. “Not that.” Her bottom lip is pulled between her teeth. “I got an email about my viva exam.” “Your viva? But you haven’t submitted your thesis yet.” “Actually,” “Stop.” He lifts a hand to press it against her mouth. “You submitted your thesis already? You completed it?” She nods, her laughter muffled by his hand and he drops it. “Well, what did it say? The email.” “Once I get to the ceremony, I will officially hold a doctorate in education and history.” He kisses her before she can say anything else.

“Unbelievable my love, unbelievable. Two doctorates by twenty-three.” He shakes his head, smiling wide. “You know what that means right?” He shakes his head again, unable to think of anything. Too overcome with his proudness and love for her. “I’ll have my position at Harvard right after the ceremony.” Blue eyes widen. “And they agreed to let me teach a mix schedule for all of 2022, but when the official school year starts for 2023, I’ll just be teaching digital.”

Twenty-three and twenty-five has them weathering the media storm once again as Max wins his second world championship. It’s worse this time. Not because he says more than he did last time about her or says her name or slips up and calls her his fiancee and not girlfriend like they agreed to. But because this championship no one can deny is his and she’s still not there. Too busy in a different continent with the start of the school year as she teaches by herself for the first time since earning both her doctorates.

It’s also not as bad this time, because some of his friends do think that he’s seeing someone, not the girlfriend of years, or even really a girlfriend, but just some random girl that understands he’s too busy for an actual relationship and willing to put up with him spouting to the media and everyone else that he’s in a committed relationship. She doesn’t have time to focus on the media and fans that believe she exists, she barely did last year, but this year she really doesn’t.

“You know,” she says five days after he’s won his championship and they are in the house they have stayed in for the past two years when she has to be at Harvard and he wants to join her. “Around this time next year, we’ll be public.” His face does a weird contortion at the thought. There was a giddiness to the idea, to the thought, but also dread. “That means,” she continues when Max doesn’t say anything. “That you have ample time to figure out how you want to tell people.” “How I want to?” “Yeah. This is your world, your friends, colleagues, nightmares,” she adds and they both laugh. “You can decide how exactly you want to get back at them for not believing you.” “I’m not going to be cruel.” “No.” She lifts her hand and lets her pointer finger trace over his lips. “You’ve never been a cruel person, Max. But you can be a menace.” His eyes light up at that. “Oh. And you don’t care?” She shakes her head, “This is all you and I’m more than happy to be along for the ride.”

She is twenty-four and he has just turned twenty-six when he decides to enact his plan that he came up with so many months ago.

He had made a reservation for a private hall in Monaco months ago, hired a party planner to take care of the finer details, but sorted himself out the place and the food and drinks that would be served. And the day after he turns twenty-six, he picks up the large stack of enveloped invitations he had made and carefully packs them in his suitcase for Qatar. He was winning the championship there and he’d be damned if he didn’t make an already memorable weekend even better.

It’s the first time in a decade she has traveled with him to a race to actually watch the race and not just be there at the hotel to support him as she studies and he can’t help the smugness and happiness that radiates off him when he shows up to the track for the first day.

He’s got his backpack over his shoulder, but the invitations are already in his hands, ready to be passed out.

“Max!” Charles greets when he arrives in the driver's debrief room. All twenty of them, plus reserves, team principals, and Daniel sitting and standing around as they wait for the FIA representative to get here. He looks down at his watch, noting that it will at least another ten minutes, before his eyes flicker to a member of the Red Bull staff that’s standing against a wall, but just like he asked, they’ve got a camera in their hands and there’s another one standing leaning against the opposite wall, also with a camera. “Charles. Safe flight?” “Always. What do you have there?” “Ooh,” Daniel chimes in, moving closer and looking at the envelopes in his hands. “What do you have there?” He smirks and he can see Daniel’s grin flatter at the sight for a brief second. “Invitations.” He says, before tossing or passing them around to the different drivers and Christian. He nearly avoids giving Lando one just to be a shit but Toto isn’t there to give it too and it wouldn’t be the same to give it to a different team principal jokingly.

“What is it for?” Carlos asks, eyeing the dark envelope like a lot of the other drivers are, suspiciously. He shrugs, eyebrows raising when he sees the way Lando is feeling the envelope. “Mate, I’m not giving you money.” Lando frowns, before ripping it open. “You’ve got more than enough to spare.” Seeing Lando open his, has the rest of them following suit.

“Dear friends of Max Verstappen,” George reads out and the wording earns a few snorts but he continues. “You are invited to celebrate at the” he pauses squinting at the french on the page. “The Salle des Étoiles” Charles says. “Cheers, mate. You’re invited to celebrate on the 8th of November at 4pm.” His eyebrows furrow. “Celebrate what?” Max watches from the corner of his eye as Christian flips the invitation over and nearly chokes.

“Your engagement?” “Your what?” “Engaged?” “Impossible.” “Lies.”

The whole room is filled with denial and panic and Max just smiles, nearly laughing when Logan thrusts his invitation into James’ hands and asks the team principal if it’s true.

“Max, you aren’t engaged, right? Like that was a fuck up with the print place?” Daniel is nearly pleading, begging, and Max would feel sorry, but for the past ten years he’s been telling people he isn’t single, and sure he’s never shared many details, but they all refused to believe or even consider it. He ignores him, instead looking at the room in large. “You’ll meet her tomorrow. She’s very excited about it.” And as if he planned it, the FIA official walks into the room and no one can question him.

When the meeting is over he manages to avoid all of them except for Christian, who nearly drags him into a private room.

“Is this real?” Max raises an eyebrow at the way he’s waving around the invitation but nods. “Yes.” “You’re really engaged.” “Yes, Christian. I am.” The older man stares at him, not blinking before sighing and running a hand over his face. “Is she pregnant?” “What?” “The girl you’ve been sleeping with recently. Is she pregnant, is that what this is about? Because you don’t have to marry her.” “No one is pregnant.” He reassures, not even able to find any anger for Christian and his assumption. The older man sighs again before sitting down and slumping in the chair.

“You’ve had a girlfriend since you were sixteen.” There’s regret, guilt, and sorrow in his voice. “Yes.” “And I never believed you.” He shrugs, it had hurt yes, but he had always understood Christian’s disbelief in it over anyone else's. “No.” Christian nods. “And I owe you both an apology for that. I should have believed you Max.” “Thank you.” “But really, ten years and you’ve just put a ring on it?” Max groans, rolling his eyes. “You sound like our families.”

They are twenty-four and twenty-six when Max wins his third championship, with the sprint race of all things, and the whole world watches as he’s enveloped by his team before he’s tugging off his helmet and kissing the unfamiliar girl that’s between Christian and Jos, shielded from the rough crowd of Red Bull mechanics, crew, and such. They are twenty-four and twenty-six when everyone finds out that Max had been telling the truth the whole time.

Just about a month later, she eases into the spot between Max and the arm of the couch, eagerly tucking herself closer to him when he drapes an arm over her shoulders.

“You alright?” She nods, “Yeah, Vic and Tom finally left.” Max snorts, “It only took them thirty minutes.” “A record for them.” She grins, before looking at the other people surrounding them, or rather Max. She wasn’t surprised that Max had taken to quickly grabbing a few people and secluding themselves in a corner. She was a bit surprised by the people however.

Charles and Daniel which isn’t too surprising, but there’s the three rookies of the season, Liam, Oscar, and Logan, as well, a little surprising, but nothing compared to the two Mercedes drivers also in front of her.

“You aren’t trying to get Lewis to play paddle are you?” Lewis laughs, shaking his head. “I get enough of competing with him on the track. There’s no convincing me there.” “It’s fun, Lewis.” Charles says. “You should join. George you too. Make it Mercedes versus,” he pauses, eyebrows scrunching together as he tries to think of something to call himself and Max. “Lestappen.” She offers, inching away a bit when Max pinches her side. Charles doesn’t notice the pinch, just smiles at her, before looking at the two British drivers. “Yes! Mercedes versus Lestappen.” His eyebrows then furrow. “What is Lestappen?” “Mate, you don’t want to know.” Liam tells him. Logan chuckles, “I don’t know. Either he finds out now or he finds out when he googles it later.” “Googles it.” George murmurs, mocking the American accent that Logan has. “Bloody Americans.” “Yeah, yeah, tea and crumpets.” Logan waves off Georges mocking with a grin as he looks at Charles. “It’s what people call you and Max, a nickname you could say for when you two are together.” She tells him before Logan can say anything. “Oh,” he frowns, considering. “That doesn’t sound so bad.” “It’s not.” She assures.

Before anyone can say anything else, someone joins their group, eyes focusing on her.

“Dr. Y/L/N, congratulations on your engagement.” She looks at the older man in surprise before quickly standing to shake his hand. “Toto, a pleasure to see you again. And please you don’t need to call me doctor.” Toto smiles, tilting his head forwards, conceding as she sits back down. “Doctor?” Daniel questions, eyes flitting between her and the Mercedes team principal, not sure of what to make of the interaction, though Max seems perfectly fine with it. She presses her lips together and she can feel Max move a bit closer as Toto’s eyes narrow at Max. “Yes.” She tells Daniel and the rest. “I managed to get both of my doctorates last year.” A few jaws drop and Lewis whistles. “And I thought you were just a teacher.” Toto’s looking at her now, with narrowed eyes and she sighs.

It would be just her luck that despite having just met the man once, that one time had resulted in a long conversation after he gave his guest lecture at Harvard.

“You told them you're a teacher.” “I told them I teach.” She corrects. “Let's not make a big deal out of it.” “I want to make a big deal out of it.” Max mumbles and she sends him a pleading look. But Max doesn’t give in, instead he turns to the rest of them. “She’s a professor at Harvard. She got both her doctorates at twenty-three and quickly was signed on as professor.” “So, what you’re saying,” Oscar starts, breaking the silence that has fallen over the group. “Is that she is way too smart for you?” Max laughs, eyes crinkling and body bending forward from the force of it. “Without a doubt, mate. Without a doubt.”

@cixrosie @darleneslane @teti-menchon0604 @eugene-emt-roe @fanboyluvr @gemofthenight @peachiicherries @lpab @benstormy @iloveyou3000morgan @copper-boom @boiohboii @topguncultleader

[lightofraye]

Wales Comic Con (Part Two)

This may be the second and last, unless something else occurs to me and I go "Oh damn I forgot about this." As it is, I'm impressed at my ability to torture myself and endure listening to Danneel's awful, awful voice. Can someone please tell her to get vocal lessons?

(Part One is here.)

First, a shout out to my daughter for her input and helping me know where to look for anything of note! So... her thoughts are in green, mine are in red.

First 29 minutes, Danneel demeans Jensen 7 times. Interrupts him 3. Jensen is praised only for his looks 2 times.

- 1:40 Mark’s greeting to the audience is hilarious.

- 2:58 The whole time Danneel is talking, Jensen is barely looking at her.

- 3:44 Jensen realizes just how HIGH the auditorium is and hears someone shout something like “Love you Jensen!” And he goes “I love you too.” He also takes the time to be appreciative that Kurt got invited to the convention.

- 6:20 Jensen is asked about which deaths was the hardest, and he definitely quipped that Dean’s hit him the hardest. Then it was cleared up: Which of Dean’s deaths hit him the hardest? He jokes “Death by taco.” (Mystery Spot!) As Jensen is explaining this to Kurt, Danneel… does not look happy. She’s just stone-faced. Oh she smiles here and there, but she’s not liking the spotlight off her. And I cracked up when Samantha starts pretending to throw a fit because, hi, Mary’s death?! Jensen laughs and points out “Let’s go with the one that jumpstarted the whole show!”

- 8:40 Ah. The lives’ question! Which life would the cast want—Sam’s or Dean’s? Danneel picks Sam. Jensen is surprised! Mark jokes “This is going to be a fun weekend!” Jensen: “Do tell.” Danneel explains that Sam is the nicest guy! Jensen: “I mean she’s not wrong.” A fan tries to cover Danneel’s ass by saying it’s because she would get to hang out with Jensen/Dean all the time. Danneel tried to pretend to agree by saying “Didn’t I say that?” No, no you didn’t.

- 9:53 Kurt’s answer. He started… uh, okay. He started by saying he’s hated Jensen in the past. Goes on about Jensen’s hair, about how it’s the best hair he’s ever seen in his life. Oh dear. Jensen’s… definitely uncomfortable. Then says something about Jensen’s jaw. The audience is howling. Kurt tells them to calm down. Danneel’s smug now. I can’t quite catch what Jensen’s saying, but it sounded like he owed Kurt for the compliment, thus comes out Danneel’s “I already paid him.”

- 11:40 (Danneel looks bored here. My gods.) DJ’s answer about being Ellen made me laugh. “She works at a bar!” Samantha looked like she had a laugh out of that. Then Jensen’s joke to Kurt about cushiest schedule.

- 11:57 Jensen’s joke to Kurt about cushiest schedule. Danneel interrupts about “Oh so you wanted to be Sister Jo!” Jensen’s laugh did not sound authentic here. Danneel didn’t like it, judging from how she kept shoving at his shoulder and he refused to look at her. DJ is fidgety and uncomfortable here. Hmm. Jensen’s answer: “Two people—Rowena or Crowley.” He feels they’re so interesting. Being bad but playing for the good guys. And he threw in Soldier Boy, haha! “See what I did there? I wove that back to me, somehow!” More bored Danneel looks. MY GOD WOMAN, it’s your HUSBAND.

- 14:00 As Kurt and Mark are talking about characters, Danneel pulls this “God I’m bored” look. I wanna shake her. Kurt also picked Crowley. Mark loved it!

- 15:17 Mark talks about being Crowley, then points to Jensen about a conversation of sorts they had on a plane once. He talks about how to love Supernatural is to love the Winchester brothers. There was no way around that. YES! Thank you, Mark! (Also his story about his poor stunt double had me laughing.)

- 18:00 Samantha’s answer, haha! “I would like to have been God.”

- 18:20 Ah. Danneel’s bullshit answer about auditioning for any female role. We know you lied, woman! Stop it! Oof. Jensen’s like “Uhm. Yeah.” Hiding his face, hiding his expression. He’s leaning away from her. (Ohh. Samantha intrigues me. She’s all “But it was the perfect role for you.” She’s not sincere. Nope.)

- 19:14 Ah. Danneel’s thing about working with a great actor. Jensen was trying for modesty “Okay, all right!” Then she shoots out with “Mark Pellegrino.” Jensen’s smile is forced and he isn’t looking at her. That stung. And she laughs, patting him hard on the shoulder. Well, a pat/shove and Jensen’s refusing to look at her. Jensen plays off her comment by saying “See, I did you a favor.” In regards to her not getting any role until Sister Jo. He plays along with her lie. Oh Jensen…. He made that dig about himself. And she doesn’t reassure him. Not one bit.

- 20:00 Oh! The supernatural question. Good lord, DJ went off on a spiel. I’m… intrigued. Is he hyper?

- 21:25 Jensen has this “Oh god.” Danneel is smug and amused. Uh oh. I think they’re about to go into the haunted mansion thing again. Yep. I was right. And Danneel keeps interrupting him. Good lord woman, let him talk.Jensen is more practical. (Ditto.) Apparently Danneel will believe anything and everything. That’s… not a good thing, actually. Also, DJ, stop kissing her ass.

- 23:47 Did she… yep. Danneel turned a divining rod into a sexual innuendo. Jensen just keeps avoiding looking at her. She tries to correct herself and just keeps making it worse. Again, she keeps shoving at Jensen’s shoulder. What is with her and that? Mark tries to interrupt about how it’s 15 years of conditioning regarding Jensen. He hears about something haunted and his first thought is to go to the trunk of the car to deal with it.

- 24:45 Ah. The basement story. Danneel interrupts him again—stop doing that and let him talk! And he’s plenty fun—watch him with Jared!First, I wanna know—what’s in the basement that they didn’t have room for in that gigantic house? I mean, seriously. Unless that’s where he’s been living, separate from the rest of the family. It is big enough…. Andddd…. She interrupts him again. Sure, sure, people life, but he’s exasperated by it. He manages to finish the story and yeah, it’s funny.

- 26:13 Ugh. Kurt. No. They’re not cute. Sigh.

- 31:10 HAHA! A fan had a question for Jensen and Mark playfully throws his arms in the air. I’m not 100% sure what the question was—sounded like it was about languages. Jensen quipped he was glad it was mainly Jared who had to do Latin, Sign Language, Lucifer, Soulless, “give it to the big kid”. Haha. “He’s such a nerd.” Ha! Jared or Sam, Jensen? Oh! Jared took Latin in school?! That’s cool! Jensen notes the writers must’ve found out and kept giving more of it to Jared. Jensen said it made him appreciate Jared’s skillset more. Then they segued into DJ and Jensen having to tap dance and the story is making me laugh!

- 35:35 Okay. Now I see why my daughter is critical. But I also understand. Sign language is hard. I grew up with it; I’m fluent in it. I was tested once and was measured at Advanced Intermediate, which is almost natural fluency. (It was for an interpreter job; I had to be certified at language level.) And even then I still don’t know all the signs! I’d have to ask my uncle—who is deaf—and go “What sign is for this word?” So I get it. It’s not easy.

- 38:26 Okay. Stop. I have to say this. Why is Danneel there?! She was in 5 episodes, admitted she didn’t watch the show at all (she lied about knowing Castiel’s lines, etc, for cryin’ out loud!), and so all she can do is just sit there, keep wiggling that damned foot of her, fuss with her fake-ass hair, and nod, as if she knew anything at all!

- 38:59 Okay. I’m cackling at how DJ goes “Don’t make up answers. They already know it!”

- 40:11 Right there, Danneel touches Jensen’s knee. He actually purposefully moves away. Interesting….

- 40:23 Mark: “I remember you singing ‘I’m too sexy for my shirt’. That was phenomenal.” Jensen: “I’ve washed that from my mind.” Haha! And yes, Mark is right. If you hear “Carry On”… something awesome is about to happen.

- 42:10 Last fan question. For Jensen. Mark and Kurt threw their hands in the air. I’m sorry, I laughed. It’s about what it was like switching from Dean to Soldier Boy. We know this is a fib answer. Jensen begins about how Kripke told him to not to do Dean. Jensen’s flabbergasted, because, yeah, he’s spent 15 years being Dean. And I love how he just plays Kripke going, flippantly, “Yeah. Pretty much.” on dropping Dean.

- 43:40 I had to make a separate time stamp for this. Jensen was trying to give a compliment to Danneel (why? She doesn’t deserve it) and Danneel barks into the microphone: “Water!” As though pretending to be Jensen being ‘Dean’ at home. Then she ‘cutely’ adds: “Go get your own water!” Jensen looks away, completely. Jensen: “No, that’s just me acting like an actor.” Yeah, he laughs… but that’s not a real laugh, not the way he gets with Jared or even JDM. It’s not funny at all. And I don’t buy Danneel “helped” him at all. Maybe record, as someone had to hold the damned camera, but it was Kripke who critiqued. Not Danneel. She can’t act her way out of a paper bag.

- 44:00 Kripke giving him the compliment as not seeing Dean in Soldier Boy.

- 45:00 Here Jensen actually asked Mark, Sam, and Kurt their process on being different characters. Kurt follows with an excellent compliment for Jensen about how he was always excellent, always cared, which was a part of the reason why the show lasted so long. Jensen’s deeply moved by this. I’m just in my feels here, y’all.

- 46:58 Now Mark’s compliment. “The lack of self-aggrandizement is—is empirical. It’s absolute. If you want to tell a story, which you do, which all of you do. I’ve watched all of you work. You want to tell a story, that supersedes ‘I want to look cool’. ‘I want to look cool’ is where you go back to the same. It’s when you go ‘how do I go tell the story’ and when that question just goes ‘how do I tell the story ‘that everything changes. And that’s down to the writing and down to the want and the love of the story and the love of what you want to convey. And I’ve been so lucky in my career that I’ve had so many things been given to me and or even written for me which is mind-blowing to me. Going ‘oh my god what do they want from me’ and I know Soldier Boy is like that for you because I’ve watched it. And there’s nary a spot of Dean in that. There’s no… it’s new. It’s something. It’s different. It’s a fully fledged character. And that’s what I expect from you anyway. You know what I mean? It’s what I expect from you. Because you want to tell the story. You know? That’s what I think difference is between the stuff that we like as fans—it’s made with passion, it’s made with love, it’s made with heart. It’s doesn’t always succeed. It isn’t always brilliant. But it’s made with an honesty to itself. As long as we honor that honesty to itself then we as fans, we as lovers, we can truly embrace it and go yeah, there’s something there for me. And that’s the greatest gift we get.” Jensen is truly honored by the compliment. It’s obvious. He doesn’t get compliments a lot at all… damn.

- Danneel is enjoying the attention she receives until 2:42 when Jensen is greeting the fans. She is side-eyeing him with extreme animosity as though he just sole away her spotlight.

- 5:08 Bobby’s death; Danneel interrupts when Jensen starts to answer.

- 9:29 Kurt begins to uplift and praise Jensen… but only for his looks. (???) This causes extreme discomfort for Jensen.

- 9:40 Danneel responds with a dig: “I already paid him.”

- 10:55 Danneel demeans Jensen after he asks “Do we pick characters on how interesting they are or characters who have the cushiest schedule on the planet?” and in doing so, she smacks his shoulder and laughs, “I’m kidding!”

-11:18 Just as Jensen states that he would rather play Rowena or Crowley, Danneel makes a less than pleased expression. Kurt is confused because—Jensen is “The Pretty Boy”. He can’t be “Interesting”. Mark is understanding and DJ is maintaining at least some modicum of professional intrigue.

-12: 04 Finally a dig at Danneel, a way of lightly defending himself in the form of playful banter. There is, unfortunately, a knowing look from DJ.

- 17:17 “I would have done any female role on Supernatural”. --Jensen is mentally calling her a liar while she is putting him down in front of an entire audience. Jensen is looking down in shame and astonishment at the hubris.

- 18:15 “I got to work with a great actor”—proceeds to embarrass Jensen again.

- 21:23 After Jensen discussed the possibility of there being something supernatural or beyond our understanding, Danneel proceeds to interject with her take in a more competitive tune. DJ kisses her ass. The two tell the haunted house story at 21:53.

- 23:13 Danneel demeans him.

- 24:41 “Must have been the air conditioning.” Demeans him.

- 33:04 Jensen critical: Lacks the capability to empathized or acknowledge that ASL may be vital as an actor for long term career path. (Note from Raye: This is my daughter's thoughts. Not mine. Respect it.)

- 42:30 Danneel would have to tell me (Jensen) to stop playing Dean at home… Jensen proceeds to rock back and forth apprehensively as Danneel makes fun of him in what again is a demeaning behavior in the form of witty banter.

-45: 35 Jensen’s acting is finally encouraged and praised by Kurt, and Mark, as opposed to his looks.

--

I... honestly, y'all? I don't see the chemistry. The banter? Nope. That's not bantering. Maybe a touch of it toward the end when she actually isn't putting him down. And I know I'm not the only one who saw it.

Not one compliment. Not from his "wife". It had to come from Mark, who praised him beautifully, at the end.

This was Comic Con Wales, 2024.

[deancasbigbang]

Title: The Citadel: Vassal for Ransom

Author: KaylieMalinza

Artist: Aceriee

Rating: Explicit

Pairings: Dean/Cas, Dean/Benny briefly alluded to

Length: 50000

Warnings: Graphic Description of Injuries, Violence, Death, Dub-Con

Tags: Fantasy AU, worldbuilding, impact play, non-diegetic BDSM, giant!Cas, whump, stone top Cas, bittersweet ending, porn with plot, magical healing

Posting Date: November 11, 2024

Summary: Fantasy AU featuring geology, politics, family drama, metaphysical mystery, and lots of spanko smut. "His vassal's body is his to inspect and to direct, to deliver unto discipline and to succor; to countenance neither bloodshed nor corporeal wanting." When Dean and his guards are attacked by demons at the oasis, they must flee into the desert and beg for assistance from the nearest angelic citadel. He doesn't want to--the angels are weird and cold and isolationist, and it's unnerving how they can stride across the sand as giants, tall as trees, or shrink down to the size of a man with just a moment's thought. But with the supplies lost in the attack and one of his men grievously wounded, Dean doesn't have a choice. The citadel commander, Castiel, insists that Dean pledge vassalage--just temporarily, until Prince Sam back home can arrange for the ransom to be paid. The problem is that Castiel never would have agreed if he'd known Dean's true identity, and his connection to the mysterious Berserker who can murder angels as easily as breathing. Castiel's second in command is suspicious, Dean's own men doubt his judgment, and the demons are still eager to attack. Through it all, the pledge between liege and vassal grows from a political expediency to something more intimate and intense; something which neither Dean nor Castiel may be able to break when the time comes.

Excerpt: Ketch crawls up to the crest of the dune, sand sliding in his wake, and peers over it. "The demons appear to have lost our trail," he says, "but I expect they'll pick it up again soon. I don't recommend returning to the oasis." "No kidding," Dean says, as Charlie presses a tin of whitepaste into his palm; he always scrapes it off before they sleep, and obviously didn't have a chance to re-apply before the ambush. Now the sun is bearing down, and his skin is going tight and dry. "Martin, you know this area," Dean says, scooping out a healthy dollop of whitepaste and slathering it across any exposed skin: face, neck, the backs of his hands. "Suggestions?" Martin is squinting at the horizon, muttering, so Dean gives him a minute. He checks on the girls; Jo is tying on her archer's braces and Charlie is twisting Jo's hair up out of the way and smearing fresh whitepaste on the back of her neck. Dean jams his fingers at Charlie's hairline, because she never puts the whitepaste back far enough and then complains about burned scalp. "Should be a citadel near here," Martin says. "Commander is a little more friendly to humans than most." "That's not saying much," Benny cuts in. His whitepaste is cracking in the gap between shirt and deathmask, probably because he puts it on too thick. Dean reaches out to smooth out the crack, but his fingertips slip too deeply into it. So Benny didn't make it out of the melee unscathed, after all. No wonder he was moving slow. No wonder he's leaning a little too close to Dean, unable to keep his balance on the shifting sand. Charlie turns to see the mess on Dean's fingers, black-red and gelatinous clots mixing chalky pink against the paste, and she retches. "Pussy," Jo mutters, but she refuses to look at it. Even Ketch goes a little green. Martin's a breath away from passing out. "Any time your liege wants to take care of that would be great," Dean says. Benny snorts a laugh that forces a chunk of clotted blood from the slit. "She might not be paying attention," he says. "She's got a few thousand other vassals, you know." Dean grabs the front of his shirt and yanks him forward, staring through the eyeholes of the death mask. "Eve," he snaps. "Eve, listen to me, you had better--" "Mind your manners," Benny growls. Ketch skids down the dune. "Demons are moving again," he says. "Heal him," Dean says. He flicks his glance away and back, meeting Benny's eyes now instead of looking through them at the eldritch bitch who claimed him in death. "Tell her to heal you right now." "I suspect you are misconcepting the nature of vassalage," Benny says. "I don't give her orders." "Should I say please?" Dean asks, but he doesn't have to: the wound is seaming up, muscles jumping, whitepaste flaking away from smooth, whole skin.

DCBB 2024 Posting Schedule

[grapejuicestyless]

The Tide Always Goes Out

Conrad Fisher x fem!reader

ANGST

Summery: You were sick. You had always been sick. But you looked so healthy, so it couldn’t be true. Conrad could live in denial of his best friend’s inevitable death but there was nothing he could do to stop it and he has to accept it.(Inspired by the book Little Women specifically the scene in the 2019 film between Beth and Jo.) Mentions of illness and death.

We sat on the beach squished on a small blanket. wrinkles from our shifting and creases beneath us from where we sit. We talk about everything and anything all morning. Not minding the grey overcast of the clouds covering the usually very blue sky. Or how the waves are more violent than they usually are. I know this because I remember it vividly. It wasn’t that long ago I was really there. Making sure it would last forever. Only now I wish I hadn’t because it haunts me more than it comforts me. And the entire way it played out still makes my heart ache with regret.

Somehow I end up with her lying over me. She lays her head in my lap, the thin blanket woven together with faint reds and oranges creating a little hammock for her to rest on. I can feel the way her heartbeats erratically over my thigh. The way her lip’s curl into a soft smile. The ocean reflected in her eyes. If it weren’t for the heavy eye bags and the slight tremble in her bones, she’d be normal. A normal girl with no issues. You wouldn’t even know how deeply her suffering ran. Sometimes, on the better days, I let myself become fooled as well. Playing dumb hurts less than facing the truth.

“Con.” Her eyes flick up to mine, and I can’t help the way my own avert her gaze. I am too afraid to face her. Even now. The girl who I worship day and night. I never did pray before her, but now I pray that when I wake up, she’ll still be beside me. And we can enjoy the company the other has to offer just one last time. I can’t look down and see how much she’s changed. It scares me, because the traces of the illness torturing her is evidence to how real it is. And I would rather live in oblivious bliss.

“I want you to know I’m not really scared anymore.” It’s not what I expected to come from her lips, but it’s what she lands on. Theres no room in her wording for me to deny what she’s trying to say. My eyes flick down to hers, and my hands moves the hair blowing in the wind messily across her face.

“Y/n, come on. Don’t say shit like that.” I smile, but I don’t really mean in. I don’t find her words funny, and I don’t like that my best friend is sick.

“No, Conrad. I’m serious.” She breathes out, hands pressing against my skin to lift herself up. I feel a chill run through my body without her warmth to ease the morning chill. More than that, I can feel the coolness in my heart when she separates from me, and I long for the next moment I’ll feel her gentle touch.

“I’ve had a lot of time to think about this and I’m certain that I’ll be okay.” I continue to look at her, but only this time, she is the one looking at the sand, tracing her fingers in it as they stretch past her ankles to the floor.

“And I’m only so sure because I know you’ll be there.” Her eyes flicker up to the sky and I swear I see the sky brighten for just a moment. The blue underneath all the grey breaking free for a split second. “I’ve known you my whole life, and I’ve felt things for you that I have felt with no one else. I know you, and I trust that you’ll come find me in the next life.” Pulling at her lip, she waits for a response.

“But I want to keep you in this one.” My hand finds hers and all I can do is squeeze onto her desperately. Wanting nothing more but to keep her close. So I can watch her. Make sure shes okay. She’s lost all of her fight, her will to stay. And I know it’s because of the pain. I’ve heard her sobs just down the halls and the hushed whispers of my mother and her’s. But part of me wonders if it’s simply because I did not do enough. If I wasn’t enough reason for her to stay.

“It’s like the tide going out. It goes out slowly, but it can’t be stopped.” And we both know it. Theres no stopping what will happen to her. Theres no wish or medicine or fight that could keep her here beside me. It makes me want to cry, but I don’t. It would be selfish of me to get so upset when I am still here. Well and alive. Promised many years to age and achieve things she never was given the chance to.

“I’ll stop it.” I don’t look down at her, but I can feel how she shifts. The way her frown only deepens and the bags in her eyes get heavier. She sighs heavily into the silence, shaking her head slowly. She refuses to cry though. Partly because I know she knows she’ll have plenty of time to cry in the darkness of her room, when the ache in her bones is too much and theres no way of stopping it. And the other part of me recognizes that it’s because there’s no reason to in her eyes.

Y/n knew it better than all of us. She had lived a good life. She could do things and want things some children could never even dream of. She had a warm home with a glowing fireplace that her family often gathered around. A loving sister and a great brother. Her mother and father were healthy and she had the best friends she could have ever asked for. Her only regret is that she had to make her own mother pick out the details for her headstone.

When I pull her into my body, I have no idea it will be for the last time. I have no clue that her sobs won’t part from her lips. Because when she closes her eyes, she doesn’t drift into her usual place of rest. Her eyes don’t flutter open at the soft creak of the stairs when Jeremiah decides he wants a late night snack. Nor does she stir when Steven laughs, following behind him not as skillfully.

Not even when her mother screams early in the morning, hands clinging to her limp wrists, cold and lifeless. The tears from my mother mixing with her younger sisters don’t even make her flinch. And it’s chilling because it almost looks like she was smiling. The lift of her lips is barely there, but it makes me feel better knowing she went in peace.

I remember that day more clearly than ever. How the grey sky haunts me and the way she spoke so surely about her death still sends chills through my veins. I could have only wished to have looked at her a little closer that day. So that even in her darkest moments, I could be as certain as she was that the image of her would never fade, and I would always be able to memorize each wrinkle in her skin.

So I tell myself that when it’s my time, I’ll do what she said I would. I’ll find her in the next life. And I’ll look a little harder at her, and I’ll admire her for longer.

[minheelovelee]

Could you do the smut a-z for jo!!

jo a-z smut

thank you for requesting! i was super excited to work on this. loving loving loving jo so much today.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

gentle giant. he's quite good at aftercare. once he catches his breath, he'll get you whatever you need. bonus points are awarded for round two in the shower or bath.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

he likes his partners' hair. grabbing it, pulling it, playing with it. he pulls his partner back by their hair during doggy. put that picture in your mind rq.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

his favorite place to cum is inside your mouth. his partners can rarely fit his entire length inside their mouths. watching them struggle always tips him over the edge and get him shooting ropes.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he is a horny menace and wants to get caught. just once or twice, he wants to be seen with his hands shoved down your pants and teeth on your neck. he doesn't get a lot of credit from his roommates and is always excluded from sexual discourse. he's too shy to say anything, so he speaks with actions. he'll purposely leave the door unlocked while you suck him off. he gets risky with his hands during group activities. he's only seen when he wants to be seen. if you're willing to participate, he would love to get a blowjob in a public bathroom.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

probably has no experience. but, it wouldn't surprise me if he's gotten an accidental handjob or seen boobs a few times.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

something about cowgirl. it does it for him. he likes thrusting up when you're hovering above him. he gets great access to your boobs and neck.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he gets into his head and comes off as serious. he takes sex seriously and values his partners. he tries to laugh off little mistakes or mishaps. otherwise, sex with him is extremely intimate and special.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

i feel like he doesn't shave. maybe he does a little taming, but he would never go bald. he would feel too naked while being naked.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

sex is very important to him. he doesn't tread lightly and he likes to set clear boundaries. he's always asking questions on how to pleasure you. even when you're too shy to respond, he reads body language well and learns from mistakes. he's a terrible fwb.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

secretly, he's such a horn dog. he has to jack off at least 5 times a week. there's a lot of pent up energy and emotion within jo, it could very well express itself through his sexuality.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

size kink. his size kink is crazy. he was blessed with a giant body and he's learning to use it well. he doesn't realize it's something that turns him on until he meets someone really small who he wants BAD. when his mind drifts into thoughts of their small, tight body, he realizes why he's down so bad. "small girl big cock" is his most recent porn search.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

he likes somewhere with a little risk. the couch always gets his heart pumping. he likes the bathroom, too. when his friends pound on the door asking him to hurry up... poor boy hasnt even touched the shower yet. he was too busy eating you out against the counter.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

when you wear his clothes.

seeing you be assertive or confident.

jealousy/when other people look at his girl.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

he's quite risky, but i think he draws the line at non-con. cnc could be negotiated.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

he's 50/50 on the giving/receiving spectrum. he LOVES eating pussy. any position, anywhere.

but receiving... he loves loves loves getting head too. shoving himself down someone's throat is the highlight of his week. especially if they choke a little.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

i think he switches it up. he either takes his time with a slowwwww pace, or likes things quick and dirty.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he's not big on quickes. but i will say, the second he finds himself alone with you, his hands are immediately tangled in your hair.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

hes actually a very brave boy when he gets comfortable with sexual encounters. a little exhibitionism never hurt. he's a "go with the flow" kind of guy, so he never says no to something his baby wants to try.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

he actually has great stamina. he's okay for 2-3 rounds, and would go all day if he was in the mood.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he doesn't own any. he likes restriction, but he has the strength to hold you back himself. he might find himself owning a gag at some point.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

he is such a lover. teasing isn't a big thing for him. but, he is firm when it comes to punishment and following through on his word. if he says you're not cumming tonight, you're not cumming tonight. sorry.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he's not loud, but he makes a lot of noise. if that makes sense. he's always asking questions and looking for ways to make sex more pleasurable for the other party. a very sweet boy who talks a little and groans a lot.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

loves seeing you in his clothes. wearing his shirts or sweatpants is a sure way to get his attention. some of his fondest sexual memories consist of you wearing his clothing.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

his cock is huge. just trust me. those long legs, arms, and fingers can only mean one thing.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

jo is a very nice boy who always respects boundaries. when he's in a relationship, he is horny ALL the time. like im not kidding its weird. he gets possessed by a sex demon when his significant other is around.

overall, his sex drive is above average. he's just really good at hiding it from people he's not fucking.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

jo likes snuggling after sex. he's bound to fall asleep. he does so much work during sex, there's no way he isn't exhausted. i'd give him thirty minutes before he's conked out.

[maxipad33]

my mouth wide open like a hungry chick: snippet of your maxiel wip? 🐤

omg my maxiel wip yes! i'm always happy to talk about it, the fic is called oubliette and it's a clunky pit of angst that i've been chugging away at slowly!

more abt the fic below in the read more, but some warnings before opening:

cw: non-con, non-consensual drug use

disclaimer: i don't consider myself a writer in the slightest i just really love reading fic and decided to try to write one myself LOL

oubliette follows a canon-adjacent max after he discovers he was drugged and raped despite having no memory of the event. very slowburn but daniel tries to be there for him later in the aftermath and recovery.

here's a snippet of max after getting examined in the hospital:

“Do you want to call anyone?” she asks, and when he nods she leaves the room to give him some privacy. With a gentle snick the door closes behind her, and Max exhales as he’s finally alone. He fishes his phone out of the pocket of his jeans, still piled in a heap on the empty chair in the corner. He can feel the cold linoleum of the floor through his socks. He sits back down, staring at his contacts list, before laying down fully when the wall of names makes him feel lightheaded. He scrolls down, hovers over his mother’s name. She hasn’t spoken to him since…since before, but surely she would… He thinks of his mother, who likes to busy herself with gardening and recently learned how to crochet little hats and mittens for her grandchildren, who used to look blankly out the kitchen window before Jos would come home from work. Max thinks better of it and calls his dad, remembers the way his hand felt so much bigger and warmer than his when he was younger, the way he could grab him and swing him up onto his shoulders in one cool movement, the way he felt bigger than the entire world. The phone rings, and rings, and rings, and clicks over to voicemail. His throat feels tight as he dials again.  Alsjeblieft, he thinks, Papa, he begs, and misses the way Jos’s arms held him tight when he skinned his knee falling off his bike, when he got his super license, when he first won the championship. It’s all going away now, he realizes, and the phone keeps ringing. He doesn’t even let it go to voicemail, just hangs up and dials one last time. His father is slipping out of his fingers, probably slipped out of them a long time ago, when he looked down on his only son and didn’t recognize him, pathetic and lost, sitting alone on a couch in an apartment filled with decay. If desperation was an animal it would look like Max Verstappen, phone clutched in one hand as he lay lonely in an examination room. Papa, Papa, he begs like he’s a child again, but the phone goes to voicemail, and he breathes shakily into the receiver. I’m scared, he thinks, and knows it to be true. “Ik ben bang, Papa,” he chokes out, but the dial tone sounds in his ear and it’s over. Unbidden, a single tear falls from his eye, and then suddenly a flood, and his whole head feels hot as he cries.

[lestappenforever]

Hello hellooo it’s your social psychological anon back with some takes because I have so much to say but am waiting till after the race but I, like most of the lesteppies, cannot get over the comments made at the post quali press con and had some very insistent thoughts that need to be aired immediately.

I am of course talking specifically about the comment from Max of “I always thought if I made it Charles would too”. This is an actual goldmine comment from Max because it really lets us have a glimpse and a clue into how Max thinking about Charles -apart from the obvious he is my rival and we hated each other as kids- and really beautifully contextualises their interactions (also explains further why Max is, for me atleast, such a standout factor in lestappen interactions). Because Charles says the opposite, that at the time F1 was so far away and he couldn’t even think about it and he didn’t have the same thoughts as Max. Keep in mind Max’s background, he was essentially conditioned for F1, to think that every other option is inadequate and that there can be no future except in F1. And in that future, he most likely factored in Charles as a given. When he thought about his future in F1 he thought about how he will fight Charles and when he thought about Charles he thought about them in F1 and I think that is absolutely insane and such an interesting window into how max has thought and continues to think about Charles. That quote about how Jos prophesied that they would be fighting even in F1 in the same way Max did the same, it is a natural conclusion that they would always be together and fighting because they were the standouts.

It makes me wonder then- pure speculation- that if Charles became synonymous with Max’s dream of a future at F1, how far Charles became a part of that dream and how far Max took on Charles’ success as his own as it contributed to the ultimate imagined future of Max fighting Charles in F1. It would certainly be in line with Max/Jos helping Charles once Max moved to F1 by recommending him (though this isn’t confirmed information so take this piece of lestappen lore with a pinch of salt) and Max essentially being rather unsatisfied that Charles’ team isn’t giving him a car that could allow them to fight. Their infamous 2019 Austria podium also where the differences between the two was seen where Max wanted to celebrate with him by turning towards him to spray champagne but Charles turned away and walked off rather angrily. In fact that entire season post-Austria you can see how Max is the one who is trying to interact with Charles and is looking for that approval and recognition from him, to have the reciprocity within recognising their joint achievement and how far they’ve come. I noticed it first with the flag-gate video where Max, geography extraordinaire, ✨forgets✨ what Monaco��s flag looks like. But even before that you can see max staring at Charles trying to think of ways to try and interact before he notices the flag and goes for it. (https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGeJ9yY74/ I first noticed it in this video so here it is, also the music is just fitting)

This also very much supports what I have previously said (https://www.tumblr.com/lestappenforever/733057722779664384/hello-hello-again-i-am-very-honoured-to-be-called) about Max’s insistence that they are rivals because he wants to have this relationship with him because it has been an integral part of his dream- in that way that you imagine scenarios of the future - Max doesn’t care about his rivalry with Lewis or Daniel or anyone else because it has to be Charles for that imagined future dream of them racing in F1 to come true- it has always been Charles and it always will be (que Charles verbatim saying that “he wants to beat me as much as I want to beat him and that’s how it is and always has been”)

This makes what Max says about them being here together hit so much harder because he first says he’s never been surprised that Charles is sitting here and then after a sentence reiterates again: “it’s not a surprise that we are sitting here together”. It’s not enough to say that he isn’t surprised Charles is here he has to go back and re-emphasis that it’s no surprise they are here together and re-frame the statement to put Charles and Max together. Again, I’ve said this before about performative relationships with those you regard highly and drawing a sense of intimacy from knowing that other people thinking about the two of them in conjunction with one another- in the minds of the outsider they exist as a duo and this is an impression that Max especially seems to want to cultivate (also seen during the interview where Max invites Charles because the interviewer literally says that he will ask Charles in a moment but Max will take the opportunity to bring them closer and that’s just 🤌).

Anyway, that’s all for the moment. Let’s collectively manifest on track action for our boys because they deserve it and maybe finally see a Charles pole to win conversion (as long as Max doesn’t try to dive bomb into him into turn 1 because that will defo be hectic for mid-field especially). ✨ 🫶

Clickable TIktok link for convenience.

Clickable link to previous ask for convenience.

Social-psychological anon is back with more brilliant insights into Lestappen dynamics.

Social-psychological anon, I have missed you so much, and this ask has made my entire weekend. The perspective you are giving into the Lestappen content from today is just *chef's kiss*. ❤️

[linguist-in-a-blanket]

I saw so many BBC Ghosts fans here trashing the American version that I finally gave up and watched the original.

Well, thanks, I hate it.

Some of the plots were more amusing, yes. I personally liked how the sister story played off. I mean, when in American version we see Jo from Mythic Quest show up with that "nice" smile for one episode, we know what's up from the first second. When it's a seemingly genuine woman who has a couple of episodes to actually earn Alison's and our trust, it's much better. I also liked most of the ones that didn't make it into the remake.

But the core of this premise is characters. And British characters... They're just bad, I'm sorry, they're bad. They are all one note! There is no arc for anybody! Even the most annoying one, Thomas! His whole thing is that he doesn't know what boundaries or consent are, and this goes on for five seasons! Come on, man! Trevor in the American version has charisma, and he comes a long way in just 2 and half seasons we've seen him. This all really makes up for him being a huge jerk: at least he's a lovable jerk, plus he changes. Julian is not lovable at all, Thomas never changes, he's the same since episode 1 till the finale one. Why should we care about two one-note jerks? Flower has a lot about herself aside from being not-all-here: sex-drive, pacifism, commitment issues, basketball, backstories about at least three close people from her life (two boyfriends and brother)... Kitty is just a stupid cutie who is not-all-here, nothing else.

And this drives me to my next point. Such one-note characters without any development simply cannot have a deep connection. Nobody likes each other in this show. I've seen a lot of takes that American ghosts and Sam are friends, while British ghosts and Alison are family. Well, if you mean an abusive family that you can't get away from, that never gives you any good feelings, sure. But do we really need that? Whom of the ghosts does Alison actually like? She hates Thomas and Fanny (never has this realization about her unrealized motherly feelings, and Fanny herself never realizes why she is like she is and how she can change), she doesn't understand Robin (after spending a day with him and learning what he knows, she just gives him to Fanny as a pet), at the very best she pities Kitty. The only one who actually likes Alison as a person is Kitty, but she has her own projections, she is like a duckling who saw the first person near them and said "mommy". She's actually not much better than Thomas in that way, same level of neediness and clinginess, just more lovable than him, and it's not sexual harrassment, more... platonic harrassment? Yay?..

By the way, Alison also doesn't change. Whenever she sees a new ghost in a new place, she is creeped out. This was okay in the beginning, but after living in a house with 9+ ghosts for a couple of years, she is still creeped out by others! Oh, I'm so sorry for your inconvenience, mam, this guy just, you know, didn't have anybody to see him or talk to him in a couple of centuries, but no, no big deal, sure. Sam is fascinated by her gift, she is always happy to explore and talk to new ghosts, Alison just finds it weird and unsettling, even after, what, five years? Girl, you are a fucking superhero! Talk to the invisible people, damn you!

Sure, it could be about not being able to change, especially after you're dead, but then... why? Why should we look at bad people who stay bad, and most importantly, why should we look at them for five seasons?

When Alison weighed pros and cons for staying, she put "ghosts" in both columns. I'm sorry, but why? We almost never see her enjoying their company, almost never see the ghosts helping her (which is petty, but when American ghosts did this for Sam a couple of first times, that's when she warmed up to them)... They are always an incovenience for Alison. Never do they respect any boundaries, all they can do is do one big gesture (song, dance, theater) and move on to being annoying and needy. Never can they hear "no", never can they respect what she asks of them.

Sam says a lot of times she can't leave the ghosts, and I believe her. Even Jay loves the American ghosts! Sam has this whole group of friends and enjoys their company. They all have connections with each other and with the livings. British don't, they move in a pack and look for somebody to annoy, be that Alison or that poor neighbor ghost.

[kingkatsuki]

I'm asking everyone 👀 cause I need to know about bakujo

Shindou 👀 your boyfie takes you to a haunted forest or whatever to get you scared so you'll cling to him and it works.

But Bakugou is the best scarer there is, in the entire region no one can scare better than him. Mostly because of his adaptable and how easily he can read people.

So he always goes after pretty girls with shitty boyfriends just to get them to break up or see how shitty their boyfriend is for the fun and drama of it.

But you Jo, Bakugou is obsessed with you, has to fucking have you and is constantly scaring you and shindou in hopes you'll be his 👀

Kitten I’m so obsessed with this ask, because it would genuinely make the most amazing Kinktober/spoopy Halloween fic. And now I’m wondering whether we should’ve made our sever collab fake haunted forest vibes like this cause 👀

But I have so many ideas that can come from this!!

It’s your first date with Shindou, and you’re kinda grateful because it means conversation won’t have to flow too well because you’ll be distracted by the actors jumping out at you along the way, even if you’ll probably be getting closer than normal to him when you get scared and cling to his arm.

And maybe Bakugou sees you with such a sleazy looking asshole and decides you deserve way better than him. So he’s deliberately trying to scare Shindou, not you. Because then you’ll be free and he can take his mask off and play the hero— but of course you end up getting terrified and just hang on to Shindou even harder so it’s near impossible for him to get close to you. Until after the forest when he sees you grabbing a drink at the bar and he decides to come over to you?

And maybe Shindou is a shitty fucking boyfriend, because Bakugou recognised him and knows that you’re not the first girl he’s brought here— knowing that he must do it to have him look like a hero while these multiple girls cling to him for dear life. And Bakugou decides you’re way too good for this loser, so he decides to up the ante and get you for himself.

Or or or maybe he’s trying to scare Shindou, and instead he makes you cry so he’s pulling his mask up and breaking character so fucking fast to coo out apologies to you🥺

Or a sexy non-con idea where Bakugou manages to scare Shindou (and you) enough to spook him away, running out of the forest and leaving you all alone in that pretty dress you decided to wear. And Bakugou promises he’ll help you out of the forest and keep you safe, taking your hand and guiding you through the trees. But he’s got no intention of taking you to safety, pinning you against one of the old oaks as he keeps his mask on and fucks you against it.

But it also made me think of ghost!Bakugou, and picturing that Shindou thinks all the actors and everything in this forest are fake, and you can tell too. The jump scares are lame, and the decorations are almost an abomination, with fake spider webs hanging haphazardly in trees and those skeletons that are that yellow kinda plastic. But the moment ghost!Bakugou sees you, he knows he’s gotta have you. Whether your little boyfriend is scared off or not—

[minefield-of-a-ninja]

All fics are 18+ ONLY unless otherwise noted

SERIES

*at least three parts or chapters

28 Days - AU Dean Winchester x several AU SPN characters

Summary: Dean Winchester is an addict and an alcoholic, a USMC veteran, a father, and an older brother. As Battalion Chief with Lawrence Fire & Medical, Dean comes under investigation when he makes a dangerous and impulsive decision, defying his superiors and abandoning the team he is supposed to lead. He is given the choice to go to rehab for 28 days, or jail. His lawyer insists on rehab, and Dean begrudgingly abides.

Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Emma Winchester, Jack Kline, Victor Henriksen, Jo Harvelle, Gordon Walker, Bille, Crowley, Rowena, Missouri, Meg, Pamela, Gabriel, Lydia, Casey, Jamie, Carmen, Tessa 

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, emergency action, fire, drug use, thoughts of death and dying, teen endangerment, references to underage drug addiction and prostitution, partially told through flashbacks 

Words: 33K

Author’s notes: Inspired by the film 28 Days and following canon themes from SPN, this is a fic about Dean, a firefighter who goes to rehab, not about Dean as a firefighter.

And Then There Were Three - Winchester brothers x original female character

Summary: Natalie and Dean are in a “not serious” relationship until one night, she and Sam take a step that will change things forever.

Warnings/tags: 18+ONLY, rough sex, squirting, anal sex, butt plug, bondage, dirty talk, orgasm control, double penetration, polyamory, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 13,500

Black Tie Optional: sequel to Plus One - Dean Winchester x Vanessa (OFC)

Summary: The last time we saw Vanessa, she was swooning over Dean’s lasting impression. Now, we fast-forward a year to see what she’s up to.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x OFC Vanessa Martinelli, (eventual) Sam Winchester x OFC Emma Olsen

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, HBO RomCom bullshit

Words: 17K

Combat Baby - Dean Winchester x Jo Harvelle

Summary: canon divergent - Dean’s sweet, but Jo likes him nasty

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, rough sex, biting, dirty talk, brief name-calling, exhibitionism, role play, squirting

Words: 3,073 WORK IN PROGRESS

God Only Knows - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: One weekend, years ago, lives rent-free in both of their minds. Three-part mini-series.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, pining, clothed sex, couch sex, hungover sex, fluff, roomies to lovers, idiots in love

Words: 5,500

If We Make It Through December - Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum

Summary: Donna is horrified to learn that the boys have never had a proper Christmas, so she invites them to her house for the holiday.

Characters: Dean Winchester, Donna Hanscum, Sam Winchester, Jody Mills, Claire Novak, Kaia Nieves, Patience Turner, Alex Jones

Warnings/tags: there was no rebar, 18+ ONLY, fluff, light angst, domesticity, holiday celebrations

Words: 12K

The Kinda Girl You Like - Winchester brothers x original female character

Summary: After Sam reveals to Sofie his sub that he likes to watch, she decides that they should act on it. Then he tells her what exactly it is that he likes to watch…

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, sub-sharing, bondage, rimming, the jockey is my favorite sex position, dirty talk, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 6,500

Leaving Heaven - Dean Winchester x Taziana Smith (OFC)

Summary: Tazi is a bounty hunter of mostly human things. She isn’t firmly seated in the supernatural world, but she’s familiar enough that she’s recruited by an old friend of John Winchester’s to capture and deliver a brief acquaintance of her own.

Characters: MOC/Knight of Hell/Demon Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Crowley, Lee Webb, original characters

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, brief dub-con, mentions of the foster system, references to past rape, commiserating over childhood trauma, threats of sexual violence

Words: 16,500 WORK IN PROGRESS

The Mud On Your Boots - Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum 

Summary: Dean and Donna finally give in.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, dirty talk, fluff, consent is sexy, period sex, fisting, blood as lube, shower sex

Words: 8k (permanent hiatus)

Plus One - Dean Winchester x Vanessa (OFC)

Summary: Vanessa hates weddings until she meets a handsome stranger who agrees to help her mix things up for the night.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, fingery things, squirting, and Dean has no refractory period bc this is fic

Words: 9,600

Pretty Reckless - MOC Dean Winchester x pre-slayer Faith Lehane

Summary: AU where s10 Dean stumbles upon another hunter so much like himself. When their connection grows inexplicably stronger, they find an answer they never thought existed.

Characters: Dean Winchester, Faith Lehane, Sam Winchester, Castiel, Crowley, Cain

Warnings/tags: 19+, rough sex, prostate massage, magical bond

Words: 15K

Run Me Like A River - AU Dean Winchester x AU Jessica Jones

Summary: AU wherein Jessica Jones is super-powered by gov’t experiments to create elite soldiers, the Winchesters are military officers in humanity’s War Against Evil, and they have all gone AWOL from their assigned roles. Dean and Jess embark on a relationship that ends abruptly and explosively until Dean calls her for help on a very personal case.

Characters: Jessica Jones, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Arthur Ketch, Malcolm is Jess’s cat 

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, major character death, unhealthy relationship dynamics, bondage, rough sex, anal sex, ptsd

Words: 14K

Seasons - Dean Winchester x unnamed female character

Summary: She is his safe haven, untouched by anything else or anyone. 

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, canon divergent - no Cassie or Lisa, non-linear storytelling, four seasons, angst, hurt/comfort, references non-con unprotected sex, loss of a pregnancy

Words: 12K

Temporary Scars - Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum x Benny Lafitte

Warnings/tags: 18+, Angst, Donna has intimacy issues, Dean’s the sweetest, self-sabotage, sort of established relationship, Benny’s swoony as fuck, Dean’s in love, polyamory, pregnancy kink

Words: 4,500 (permanent hiatus)

Unopened At Your Feet - AU Sam Winchester x female narrator, AU Dean Winchester x female narrator

Summary: This is the story of how I broke my own heart.

Characters: Female Narrator, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Becky Rosen, Meg Masters, Benny Lafitte

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, weed-smoking, canon-compliant date-rape/roofie (Becky), love triangle

Words: 12,470 WORK IN PROGRESS

Where Is My Shiny Gun? -  Dean Winchester x Donna Hanscum (voyeur Sam Winchester)

Summary: canon divergent - Sam finds himself in a quandary when he realizes he has feelings for Donna by way of the obvious mutual attraction between her and Dean.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, Sam is kinky, Dean is adorable, so is Donna, Dean likes to give Donna massages, Sam directing while masturbating, brief spanking + breast slapping, brief knife play - no blood, W*ncest adjacent

Word Count: 7,800

ONE-SHOTS

A Fight For Love & Glory - Winchesters x you (female)

Summary: You’re struck by sex pollen, so Sam and Dean agree to help you out.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, sex pollen, feelings of guilt, ass play, dirty talk, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 2K

Bad Girls Underneath -  Ruby 2.0 x Dean Winchester x Jo Harvelle

Summary: Ruby and Jojo get hit by a sex curse again; this time, they need Dean’s help.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, magical-dick/male-gaze bullshit, probably too much commentary and emotional complication, why am I like this, I’m sorry, sometimes I can’t help myself, fisting, brief choking

Words: 2,600

Cactus - Dean Winchester x Meg Masters x Castiel

Summary: Post-battle, exhausted and wanting, Dean and Meg and Cas take care of each other.

Warnings/Tags: 18+ ONLY, dreamlike sex, a little choking, Dean’s always hungry

Words: 3,200

Caveat Emptor - Dean Winchester x original female character

Summary: Gabriela Cruz invests in a Victorian mansion in the middle of America where the rule of Buyer Beware is absolute. When her twin sister goes missing, a couple of federal agents show up. Lucky for Gabi, Dean and Sam Winchester are on the case.

Characters: Gabriela Cruz, Camila Cruz, Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Ed Zeddmore, Harry Spangler

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, language, mentions death of family members, cursed object, mentions of blood + gore, sarcasm, twin dynamics, explicit sex

Words: 4,600

Crazy On You – Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: You’ve had a shitty day, but this beautiful, unfamiliar boy will make it all better.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, Impala Sex, there’s a knife but not in a bloody way

Words: 4K

Crossroads and Bound - Dean Winchester x female demon reader

Summary: He agreed to this.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, femdom, Dean’s tied to a chair, wearing a cock ring, face sitting, things might get a little rough, but it’s all in good fun, squirting

Words: 2,250

The Curve Of Your Pretty Gown - Dean Winchester x female reader

Request: Hey hon! Ok, so it’s my birthday today, so maybe a story about Dean surprising me/ the reader by turning up unannounced to wish me/the reader a ‘happy birthday’ and there’s lots of smut ❤️

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, a little angst

Words: 2,200

Deep - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Dean shows you more about pleasure than ‘deep’.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, Dean being perfect, sensual massage, Dean being the best lay ever, biting, Dean being a fairytale prince, the jockey is my favorite sexual position, try it, it’s amazing, talking during sex, gratuitous use of terms of endearment bc it’s Dean

Words: 3K

Discord and Rhyme - Knight of Hell/Demon Dean x female reader

Summary: He’s on the prowl.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, rough anal sex, crying during sex, blood during sex, there’s a lot of purple prose and excessive descriptions of taste and smell here, sexual coercion, dirty talk

Words: 1,750

Ennui - Knight of Hell/Demon Dean x unnamed female character

Anonymous Prompt: “I really want demon dean stalking someone but I don’t know how to do that with consent? But guh just the thought of him.

Characters: Knight of Hell/Demon Dean Winchester x unnamed female character

Tags/warnings: 18+ only; this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester; stalking; exhibitionism; voyeurism; dirty talk; horny on aisle 3; fuck it, we ball

Words: 2,400

Equilibrium - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: They have balance.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, established relationship, cock warming

Words: 1,400

Get Down, Make Love - Winchester brothers x original female character

Summary: Steph decides to cut loose and push the envelope with her favorite fellow hunters.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, hot tubbing, drunk sex (consensual), dirty talk, mfm spitroast, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 3,200

Hark and Hush - Purgatory Dean x wolf spirit in a female body

Summary: This is the story of how Dean Winchester hunted, became enamored with, and slew the ancient spirit of the Big Bad Wolf.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, stalking, blood, gore, rough sex, character death

Words: 2,200

Hide Your Love Away – Dean Winchester x female hunter reader

Summary: Mutual hunters seek comfort for a night and a lifetime of memories.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, ass play

Words: 3,600

His Sword - Michael/Dean x female prostitute

Summary: Michael takes some time to remind Dean who’s in control.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, edge play, bondage, knife play, blood play, choking, rough sex, name-calling, character death

Words: 2,300

Just My Imagination - Dean Winchester x female Zanna

Summary: After Mary leaves the boys a second time, Dean needs a reset, or to blow off some steam – something. He heads out on a snowy evening the night before Christmas and finds just the right thing.

Warnings/tags: mature, Hallmark channel fuckery

Words: 2,800

One Night Only (23 in 1) - Dean Winchester x Mila (original female character)

Summary: While on a job in the middle of America, Dean enjoys a rigorous night of mutual gratification with a local art student.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, ass play, shower sex, dirty talk

Words: 5,500

River - Dean Winchester x Ty (Original male character), Dean x Benny implied

Summary: It’s Dean’s first winter after sending Benny back to Purgatory.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, implied underage prostitution, semi-public sex

Words: 1,600

Rules Are Rules - MOC Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Dean hasn’t been himself lately. The Mark has seen to that.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, hand around the throat, rough sex, squirting

Words: 2,400

Shattered Like A Stone - Demon Dean Winchester x original female character

Summary: The Mark is demanding, and the demon in Dean can’t deny it any more than he can deny her; it just might get everything it wants tonight.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother’s Dean Winchester, rough sex, bondage, multiple object insertion, suicidal ideation, darkfic, self-destruction, bloody sex, sadism and masochism, anal sex, Jameson as lube, spit as lube, face fucking, Daddy as title, misogynist language, choking, strangulation, assisted suicide

Words: 6,800

Some Stranger’s Hand - 2009 Dean Winchester x 2014 Risa (The End)

Summary: He lost everything.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, plush pink pillow lips for my Eloise

Words: 1,700

Spark, Flicker, Blaze - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Somewhere along the line, her life became something she didn’t like. On her 35th birthday, she makes a decision to change all of that.

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, overly descriptive orgasms, Dean’s the best birthday present ever

Words: 2,200

Stuff & Thangs That Are Awesome… And Not Awesome - Dean Winchester x female character (1st person POV)

*TWD Crossover

Prompt(s): 1) Dean has been arrested twice for indecent exposure – once was in a grocery store. 2) Jensen or Dean x Reader, a small public place, he pins you to the wall, covers your mouth and fucks you. 

Characters: Dean Winchester, Bobby Singer, Rick Grimes, Shane Walsh

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, Rick Grimes eye-fucking, Shane Walsh having a pissing contest with a young, cocky Dean Winchester

Words: 1,300

Supernova - MOC Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Since Dean’s had the Mark and the Blade, he’s pulled away from you, afraid of hurting you. You miss him, and you’ve had it. One night you push him to the edge.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, bondage, blood play, biting, bruising, knifeplay, rough sex, dubcon/mindfuck

Words: 2,500

Triptych - Dean Winchester x bisexual female couple

Summary: Dean’s on a case and meets two beautiful women. One of them is recently divorced, and the new couple invites Dean to help them kick off their new life together.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, sex toy, Dean’s real good at sex

Words: 4,700

Wait Till My Brother Gets Home - Winchester brothers x female reader

Summary: She wants to lose control.

Warnings/tags: 18+ Only, rough sex, hair pulling, mfm spit roast, bruising and chafing during sex, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 2,450

When We Fall Then We’ll Know Each Other - Dean Winchester x Benny Lafitte (voyeur Castiel)

Prompt: “There’s nothing wrong with women, but a woman can’t hold you down and fuck you like I can.” 

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, cum and spit as lube, anal sex, voyeurism

Words: 1,400

QUICK AND DIRTY

*1K words or less

Barbed Wire Carnival - Choose your own Winchester

Summary: Absence of feeling.

Warnings/tags: mature, angst, dark descriptions

Words: 300

Brimstone - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: He’s exactly what she wants.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY surprise, bitch

Words: 450

Bring It On Home - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Let’s pretend Dean wouldn’t be terrified to welcome love into his life.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, established relationship, comfort, fluff, handsy Dean

Words: 1K

Communion - Dean Winchester x female reader

prompt: Fluffy dean or Jensen smoking weed plz, ty

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, marijuana use

Words: 1K

Crash Through The Surface - Dean Winchester x Jasen (original male character)

Summary: Dean remembers his First.

Warnings/tags: mature, bi-sexual Dean, references to prostitution

Words: 800

Custard Pie - Dean Winchester x female reader

Prompt: Dean/OFC based on Led Zeppelin’s ‘Custard Pie.’

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY oral sex

Words: 800

Drag You To The Shore - Dean Winchester x GN reader

Prompt: Dean Winchester settled in between someone’s legs on the bed. Like his back to their chest, their legs wrapped around him, heels keeping his thighs open while they jerk him off, explicit but soft vibes.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY

Words: 800

Fall Away Into - Dean Winchester x Ruby 2.0 x female reader (voyeur Sam Winchester)

Prompt: “Dean x reader x Ruby 2.0 with Sam watching from the corner.”

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY drug-induced sex, OOC Dean, mff spit roast, use of the word bitch during sex, rough sex, hate sex, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 530

Foxholes - Annie Hawkins x Bobby Singer/Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester

Summary: Annie recalls time spent with each man and what their facial hair told her about them.

Warnings/tags: mature language and references to sexual activity

Words: 349

The Gazelle - AU Dean Winchester x AU Benny Lafitte x female reader

Summary: They aim to please.

Warnings/tags: mature, power exchange, Denny apparent

Words: 1K

The Good Slayer - Dean Winchester x Faith Lehane

Prompt: Dean and our girl Faith. (This is a sequel of sorts for Pretty Reckless.)

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, talking during sex

Words: 800

Hollow - MOC Dean Winchester x female reader

prompt: Would anyone be willing to write something with Dean [or Jensen] x reader to the song Love on the Brain by Rihanna

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, dirty talk, rough sex, angst

Words: 1K

I’ll Keep Them Still - Dean Winchester x Jo Harvelle

Summary: Dean remembers promises and pictures in his mind. And he remembers her.

Warnings/tags: mature, songfic, angst, dream/afterlife sequences, purple prose, I’m sorry

Words: 1K

Just One More Peaceful Day - MOC Dean Winchester x female reader

Prompt: angsty Dean with the line “I can still remember just the way you taste” from the song “It’s been a while” by Staind

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, blood play, knife play, mentions of addiction

Words: 700

Laissez Les Bons Temp Rouler -  Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: He’s got a dirty mouth when he’s drunk. 

Warnings: 18+ ONLY, dirty talk, a dirty public bathroom during Mardi Gras

Words: 600

Lifting the Veil - Choose Your Own Winchester

Summary: You’ve been missing something of paramount importance - until now.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, infidelity, squirting

Words: 1K

Mind Blown - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Mind-blowing orgasms can sometimes be literal.

Warnings/tags: mature, transient global amnesia after sex, dirty talk

Words: 560

Nihilism - Knight of Hell/Demon Dean x female reader

Prompt: Can you tell me about the morning after going several rounds with Dean he rolls over in bed and adjusts the covers, causing you to forget your shift to be his good girl a couple more times?

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, this is not your mother's Dean Winchester, name-calling, rough sex, nihilistic themes, Knight of Hell Dean, fantasies of being fucked to death? Idk it’s one of mine, might as well be yours, you’re female AFAB in this scenario

Words: 800

One For Tomorrow, One Just For Today - Dean Winchester x female reader

Prompt: before leaving on a hunt, Dean sings “Love Me Two Times” to his lady.

Warnings/tags: 18+ ONLT, Dean can actually sing, and he does it during sex

Words: 660

The Prerogative To Have A Little Fun - Donna Hanscum x Jody Mills x Winchester brothers (kinda)

Prompt: Donna’s visiting Jody for the weekend and the boys swing by on their way home from a hunt. Dean mows the lawn, Sam fixes a leaky shower head, Dean makes dinner, and they both do the dishes. Meanwhile, the ladies sit back and enjoy the domestic display.

Warnings/tags: mature, men doing manly things, inspired by Shania Twain’s song “Man! I Feel Like A Woman”, W*ncest adjacent

Words: 1K

Recompense - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: Dean is sorry for hurting the ones he loves.

Warnings/tags: mature, angst, Dean saying hurtful things then trying to make up for it

Words: 500

Scream - Dean Winchester x past-female reader

Summary: Dean tells us the real reason he loves “All Saint’s Day” as much as he does.

Warnings/tags: mature, references to coming untouched, getting turned on by scary movies

Words: 320

Soft Cell - Dean Winchester + teenage female

Prompt: Dean + reader dancing in the bunker

Warnings/tags: one F-bomb bc Dean

Words: 720

Through The White Night - AU Dean Winchester x original female character

Summary: 18th Century matrimony isn’t as simple as it is today.

Warnings/tags: mentions of wall sex and finger-y things

Words: 560

Wish - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: You want it to be love – but it isn’t. You want him – but you can’t have him. 

Warnings/tags: mature, sepia-toned angst ™ @boondoctorwho

Words: 765

With Pleasured Hands - Dean Winchester x female reader

Summary: He’s got secrets she has yet to uncover

Warnings/tags: mature

Words: 500

[nellie-elizabeth]

Grey's Anatomy: Burn It Down (20x10)

Ughhhh. Wow. That was not a good finale for me, for a lot of reasons.

Cons:

Gosh, where to even start, my list of grievances is so long. I guess let's go with a couple of the smaller irritants first: Jo being pregnant is such a no from me. And her not telling Link about it? What? Yeesh. I guess I'm glad that her dramatic passing out was just exhaustion and that she's fine, just pregnant, but I'm also very grumbly about the whole thing. It does seem like this show prioritizes storylines that I'm less interested in, and pushes aside the things that would really compel me.

Case in point number two, Lucas and his future fate. I wanted to be moved by everyone showing up to plead his case in front of Catherine, and in a way I was: good on Bailey and the interns for standing up to Catherine Fox, she badly needs to be told she's overstepping, honestly. But Lucas is just so fundamentally uninteresting to me, that the idea that the cliffhanger of the whole season is "but what about Lucas's career" just... sucks, from an investment perspective. Yasuda and Kwan and Jules are at this point far more interesting to me, and I like Simone a lot when she's not tied up in Lucas's drama. I'm just bummed about where the story investment is going, is I guess what I'm saying.

There's been a lot of retreading familiar ground this season, as I think at least for some of the characters, this show is really showing its age. Never have I felt that more than with Richard. Holy shit, Richard's role in this episode pissed me off like you wouldn't believe. The wishy-washy way he's almost retired or stepped back from surgery over the years makes every story like this feel like the boy who cried wolf, but honestly? Fingers crossed he actually finally fucking retires. Why? Well, so we can stop hearing about it, for one, and also... he killed a man???

I was honestly flabbergasted by the handling of this patient's death in this episode. The fact that Richard can wax philosophical about his past and say "it might really be time for me to put down the scalpel" after he realizes he made a totally preventable mistake and it resulted in a patient's death is just... so off, tonally, to me. I couldn't believe what I was seeing. Isn't this the kind of shit that should get Richard, and the hospital, into big, big trouble? Should we have seen the consequences through the reactions of this dead man's family or something? It just felt so flat! Someone tell Mika and Jules that they're not responsible for this man's death! And someone take Richard's badge away from him. Go on, Catherine, you're kicking every damn body else out of this joint, why not add your husband who clearly can't do his job anymore?

Before we get to Catherine, and oh boy are we getting to Catherine, let's talk about Bailey. I love Bailey, I love Ben, but this was another story that felt like such a retread of things we've seen a million times. Bailey being affected by Ben's job, worried about him constantly, it's nothing new - we see it all the time, whenever they want to amp up the potential drama here. Ben, evidently, survives the finale of Station 19, so I think hopefully we can put this to rest. I'm seeing rumblings that Ben might be coming back to surgery and thus jumping back over to Grey's. Wouldn't be mad about it, to be honest. Let's set this whole firefighter husband worry behind, for Bailey.

Then there's Nick and Meredith. Not much to say about this. I find them boring. I don't get why Meredith is invested in him. He is a nothing character with nothing interesting about him whatsoever. I hate that because of Meredith's part-time status on the show, we're probably just going to keep seeing the two of them go along in their boring relationship for the rest of however long this show goes. I wish Meredith could have been sunsetted off the show with a character I give a damn about.

And last but not least in my long list of complaints... yeah. Catherine Fox. You know, I've struggled to figure out my distaste for this character for a long time. Grey's is filled with brilliantly complicated characters, in particular it's filled with women who do bad things for good reasons, or even for bad ones, women who have egos and ambitions, women who refuse to fill a palatable role to make everyone comfortable. I'm fine with a flawed character, I'm fine with Catherine being in the wrong sometimes. But yowza! Her ego trip, her inflated sense of her own importance... I cannot with her! Do you know how much a character has to be pissing me off for me to take Owen's side on something? But when he snapped at her to let Teddy help with the surgery, I was cheering him on!

The pettiness of taking Meredith and Amelia's research away and giving it to Tom Koracick? Now, don't get me wrong, if this means we'll see Tom next season in some capacity, I'm all for it, but in terms of Catherine's actions here? It's aggravating beyond compare. Her playing politics with information that could actually save so many lives? Her complete lack of awareness that she's the one who fucked up by trying to silence Meredith in the first place? The absolutely petty move of cutting Owen's badge access off, along with Teddy's and Amelia's? Like, what the fuck did Owen do except snap at you a little bit for trying to stand in the way of a firefighter's life being saved? The audacity of her firing him too for that? Seemingly? Yeesh. Take several seats, Catherine Fox.

Pros:

Despite my many complaints about this episode, there were actually several moments I enjoyed just fine.

Catherine being annoying did allow for Owen to be a badass, and for Meredith to be even more of a badass. When Catherine says she's just like her mother, Meredith says "good, that means I'll win." Hell yeah, Mer. You tell her.

I also love Amelia so much, and I think the friendship between Amelia and Owen is honestly very charming and mature, so good for both of them there? I loved when Amelia asked him for advice and Owen said that she'd never taken his advice before, so why start now? He does eventually tell her that he personally wouldn't be giving the research to Tom Koracick, but that's just because he has extremely legitimate reasons to hate that dude.

I'm grieving hardcore for Yasuda not sticking around next season, and I hope there's a way for her contract to get renegotiated or something! Because that Yasuda and Jules almost kiss? Yes please? I haven't felt this invested in a romance that probably won't even happen in a long time on this show. But even without it being definitively a romantic thing, I love their friendship so much. I hope someone tells them right away that they aren't responsible for the death of that patient!

I'm still not "on board", exactly, for the Winston/Monica thing, but I suppose I can enjoy it for the drama for the time being? I do want Winston to be able to find happiness, honestly. I just hope Amelia/Monica is a thing we get to see in the future, too.

I'm also still in denial about Schmitt leaving next season, but I did like how annoying he was in this episode, honestly. He can be kind of a lot to handle, and I like that he's allowed to be a little more openly frustrating sometimes. Him being annoyed with Jo for not telling him she's pregnant was such a funny bit, as he realized what he had inadvertently done.

As boring as I find Lucas, I did like the little plot thread where he helps with the app to connect people who are trying to find each other. And I like that Dorian is finally discharged from the hospital - a happy ending for that patient was sorely needed after everything he's been through!

So... yeah. All in all, I'm annoyed with this episode. I'm annoyed with Catherine, I'm annoyed that Jo's pregnant, I'm annoyed that everyone's focused on Lucas, I'm bored by Nick. I'm happy that Dorian got discharged, and I'm happy that Meredith is standing up for herself, I guess? We'll be back for hopefully a bit longer of a season twenty-one. And we'll find out what the heck is going on with Kwan's amnesiac ex-fiancee... man, this show can be endearingly ridiculous sometimes.

6/10

[lgbtqreads]

Any music related books? Like band, musical or anything. Preferably with bi mc please

Sure, there's this whole section in Romance on the site posted below, and I'd also really highly recommend It Goes Like This by Miel Moreland (which does have a bi MC among the cast) and mention the new K-PoP thriller Gorgeous Gruesome Faces by Linda Cheng. There are also three country music YAs to have on your radar: A Little Bit Country by Brian D. Kennedy, The Last Love Song by Kalie Holford, and Every Time You Hear That Song by Jenna Voris (bi protag) - the latter two come out in April. Oh, and I also recommend Phil Stamper's As Far As You'll Take Me, which stars an oboe player.

As for these, more probably have bi protags than what I marked with Bs, but at least those certainly do.

Rock Star/Pop Star/Musician

F/F

Losing Control by J.J. Arias (Amz)

Making a Comeback by Julie Blair

Duet by Harper Bliss

Listen by Kris Bryant (Amz)

The Love Song of Sawyer Bell by Avon Gale - B (Amz)

Fearless by Shira Glassman

A&B by JC Lillis - B (Amz)

Burning Tracks by Lilah Suzanne

M/M

Full Exposure by Amy Jo Cousins

If This Gets Out by Cale Dietrich and Sophie Gonzales - B

True Brit by Con Riley

Idol Minds by KT Salvo (Amz)

Broken Records by Lilah Suzanne

Syncopation by Anna Zabo (P/Aro)

Counterpoint by Anna Zabo

M/F

I’ll Be the One by Lyla Lee (YA) - B

One Kiss with a Rock Star by Amber Lin and Shari Slade (B)

Reverb by Anna Zabo – Tm/Pf

F/NB

The Brightsiders by Jen Wilde (YA)(B)(P/GQ)

M/NB

Maxx Neon by Lina Langley

[jackiequick]

Ok I am a really huge fan of the classic late 80s to 90s sitcom Full House and enjoy the new one as well but the original holds a special place in my heart ♥️

FULL HOUSE OC 🏡

Adrianna “Jordan” Katsopolis ~ She-Hulk 📋

- Uncle Jesse and Pamela younger sister. She moved in with Jesse and Joey after Danny asked for them to come over and help raise his daughters.

- Nicknames —> Jory, Jo, Jodie, Adrian, She-Hulk, Anna, and etc

- Speaking of Joey, she’s is particularly his other half and with Jesse, they are a trio. They get into the craziest things and always doing something hilariously weird that you can’t help but join in. The fact that they haven’t ended up in jail for something stupid while paired up is a surprise to many but that doesn’t mean they’ve haven’t gotten caught in the act before.

- But when Danny is brought into the mix of their daily shenanigans originally, it’s a unstoppable force of 4 friends! They are such caregivers at heart with such different but similar personalities, the funny band of grown ups with humor of 14 year olds sometimes always cracking jokes, wanting the best for each other and so much more.

- Jordan is clever, easygoing, gentle and can be resourceful! However sometimes she will play pranks and jokes, even jokingly manipulate one of the guys into doing something

- Aunt and Mother figure to the girls (DJ, Stephenie and Michelle) they are all her babies. She’s a true caregiver and tends to becomes very soft around her girls. Skipping out on work days, rejecting or leaving her dates, and staying at home a lot in general just to be with her 3 little angels! Especially the years when Michelle was a baby, she spent more time at home.

- Each one the girls had their special person come to for certain things, just having a type of relationship with the guys. But with Jordan, she is like their second mom, the girls coming to her for anything and everything especially if the guys couldn’t handle it.

- Braiding hair, picking out clothing, issues at school, boy trouble, advice on things, passions they have at the moment, hugs and kisses, taking care of them when they’re hurt or sick, just need someone to hear them out and etc, Jordan is there!

- And if asked, which one of those angels are her favorite? She has no favorite. Yeah she’ll joke if something happens and say, “Steph at the moment, you’re my favorite.” Causing the girls to laugh or smile proudly. Or she would’ve coo at toddler Michelle saying, “Who’s my pretty girl? You are!”

~~~~

- A bit of a grumpy Defense Lawyer when she doesn’t get her morning coffee or something sweet in her system by the middle of the day. Since she has a huge sweet tooth, most specifically cupcakes and donuts.

- She is single but goes on plenty of dates over the course of the show. (Ends up with Danny Tanner in the later seasons)

- Jordan is known for her witty comebacks, nerdy about music and movies jokester personality when she’s around loved ones. However she is a bit of a babbler mouth and knows a lot more than she leads on.

- Also has a bit of a temper, that is well under control if i may I add and for being kind hearted woman. But sometimes her She-Hulk tends to come out! The group calls her out on it then they all jokes about it once She-Hulk disappears and she back to calm Jordan.

- But when Jordan temper sent up volumes, you better make sure that your in the clear. Sometimes she will slip and yell out stuff like “I can and will sue you!”, “I oughta-let me at ‘em!”, “Excuse me?! Oh heck no.”, and the list goes on. Usually it’s fine but Kimmy Gibbler can piss her off or someone may just annoy her.

~~~~~

Sometimes there is some to hold her back and other times…

“Joey, grab her!” Jesse yells racing off after the woman into the living room, “Jory come back, I didn’t mean it.”

Joey stood up from the couch and caught her by the waist holding her down yelling, “Woah, woah, woah hold on road runner! What happened here?”

“Jess made me look what you would consider bad in front one of DJs teacher and proceeded to flirt with her in front of everyone.” Jordan explained, trying to get out of his grip.

Joey gave him a pointed look, “Jess.”

“What? I was far more interesting than her and the other teachers were more interested me in anyway.” Jesse tried to explain and even added, “Hey at least, it went well..for me at least!”

“Jess.”

“Joseph you should’ve seen it, I was killing it. And I got to speak with the history guy and-”

Jordan grew upset and Joey smirked at her. He let her go. They didn’t let Jesse finish as Joey shouted, “Get ‘em!” The pair chased Jesse around the house as his screams and yelps could be heard. Until they reached the backyard out of breath.

Jesse put his hands up, “Hey, hey wait! I’m sorry I messed up.”

“And?” Jordan glared as Joey stood behind her, “You made me look like the uninteresting aunt!”

“Again, I’m sorry. I knew she wouldn’t care about us the second she started to talk, so I joked and flirted to lighten the mood. And I got something in return..”

Joey spoke, “Uh Jess, a gift from the school store isn’t gonna fix anything.”

“On the contrary my friend, DJ’s teacher gave me the opportunity to speak with the History teacher…”

“Yeah so?”

“We get to go bowling together next Friday…”

Jordan rolled her eyes having enough of this and about to walk inside when she heard her brother speak again. “And I got his number! He wants to go on a date with a certain someone.” Said Jesse holding up a post-it note causing Jordan to spin back around grinning.

“Really?” Jordan asked with a dazzling grin and raised eyebrows.

Joey chuckled, “Wait you got her a date with Mr Hunter? I’ve been friends with him for months, I could’ve helped!”

It turned out fine for everyone!

~~~~

- Becky is her gal! The two became friends quickly and fitted very nicely together, always coming to each other for advice, helping one another out. Girls Day Out on the streets of San Francisco, gossip about anything and everyone, the list goes on.

- AND when Jesse finally dated Becky, Jordan was more excited that her best friends, this girl was over the moon! Of course that meant she was stuck in the middle of their crazy couple shenanigans, having to root for them, and pushing one or the other to make a decision on something. Most of the time it was hilarious seeing the funniest stories take place in front of her, roasting them, Jordan set them up on a few dates and dragged on double dates with them.

—-

And that’s what I got so far! There is so much more Full House lore I could say but I’ll be here all day. I hope you enjoyed it 🖇

Tags: @gaminggirlsstuff @msrochelleromanofffelton @t-nd-rfoot @yetanotherwells @gcthvile @drspencereidhotch @sherloquestea @whitewiccan @morgan108 @topgun-imagines @ohgodnotagainn @rooster-84 @blueboirick and anyone else I might add on

[star-junk]

Only Bones

Ch. 3

Rating: Mature

Pairings: Alastor x ReaderOC, Vox x ReaderOC, Future Lucifer x ReaderOC

Second Person POV, Change of POV, Slow burn (or fast burn - really moving through the plot quickly), please forgive the typos.

Warnings: Dark Themes, Altered state of consciousness, possessive behavior, mention of dv, non-con elements in the future, cannibalism and just things not being nice--it's Hell.

General Notes: Still not sure if Alastor will remain ace within the confines of my story. Also, operating under many assumptions for Season 2 so walk with me on this one.

Author Notes: I know nothing about TV production so I'm just winging most of this. Continuing with the breakneck pace bc otherwise I'd spend endless chapters setting shit up.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea?” Jo asks.

“Hmm, I think I only feel better about it because it’s Rosie’s friend? He seemed nice enough.” You reply, sprinkling flour over the table for the dough you’re working on. The old radio you bought plays a nice melodic tune as you prepare for the next day’s special orders.

“He’s the Radio Demon, Nuria.” He insists.

“I mean, yes he is, but I hear the Princess is really nice too, so.”

He makes a point to walk over to you so you can see the skepticism on his stare while still stirring pie filling, bowl in hand and everything. “I just find it amazing how quickly you flip once money is involved.” 

“C'mon, Jo, it’s not like you’re any different.” You respond.

He pauses his stirring. “Yeah, but I actually have survival instincts." He argues, "You remind me of my uncle, you know. He used to work for the mob in the Greed Ring and guess what? He went missing years ago!” You roll your eyes, concentrating on the dough instead.

Jo refused to come on the agreed upon day, saying he wanted nothing in whatever it was you were getting yourself into. So there you were bright and early at the time and address the Radio De—Alastor gave you. 

Parking right in front of the Hotel, you had to admit the renovations made the place look like a 5 star stay. It stood out against the rest of dilapidated buildings in the surrounding area, and much like the V Tower; Different elements come together to represent a single entity. There was a radio tower at one end (no guessing who that space belonged to) and a red apple at the other.

“Quite the sight, isn’t it?” 

You nearly jump out of your skin. Alastor stands right outside to your van’s window. Your hand goes to your chest to keep your heart from escaping out of your ribcage as his smile widens. 

“H-hi, yes, yes it’s quite beautiful. ‘Morning.” You greet. “Dear Lord, you startled me.”

“My apologies, I tend to have that effect on people.” He opens the door motioning for you. “Please, Charlie is eager to meet you.” 

“Thank you.” You smile, reaching for your purse and the tasting boxes. He snaps one of his fingers and suddenly there’s a tiny shadowy creature taking the boxes from you. No matter how many years pass, you don’t think you’ll ever adjust to these kinds of things being a normal occurrence. He then helps you out of the van. “You're very kind.” 

“Ha! Aren’t you a darling.” He responds amused. You pause only for a moment before linking an arm with his when he offers it, his old manners shining through. You’re starting to see why Rosie likes him so much - ‘a proper gentleman.’

Walking up to the Hotel you take in the view. The landscape is mostly dead as it is in most places of hell but was at least kept neat. You spot some widow’s kisses blooming here and there, so the soil couldn’t be a complete lost cause.

“Do you have many guests staying?” You ask to give yourself an idea of how much work will be involved if things go well in this meeting.

“Hmm, not currently, no. But Charlie is hoping for more soon.” You get the feeling he's not very attached to the Hotel despite also being its Facility Manager.

“I don’t see why people wouldn’t want to book a stay. The renovations are quite nice, aesthetics alone should draw in crowds, if anything.” You are being completely honest about that.

“They’re… acceptable, I suppose.” And there it is again. As if he didn’t have a hand in that either, but for all that you know maybe he didn’t. “Though the staff is wonderful, a very welcoming bunch, you’ll love them!” He concedes.

You sure hope so. You swallow nearing the Hotel’s entrance, your hold unconsciously tightening around his arm.

“Oh there’s nothing to fret, my dear, there’s nothing but good ol’ chums here, mostly.” He says with a bit of flare as the doors to the Hotel open and you step inside. 

It’s just as luxurious inside as it is on the outside, of course it is, you don’t know what you were expecting. The varied crimson hues are heightened with the golden touches here and there. The furniture with elaborate designs looks expensive as all hell and yeah, maybe you could make good business here if—

“Hello, HI! Welcome!” 

A youthful cheery voice greets you. It’s Ms. Morningstar the Princess of Hell herself. You hardly have time to return the greeting as she takes your hand in a very enthusiastic handshake. Her eyes and smile outshine anyone you’ve ever met before. “We are sooo excited to make business with our first vendor.” She gushes with not an ounce of malice in her voice, “Alastor spoke very highly of your pastries.” 

“Thank you, your Royal Highness. A pleasure to meet you.” You reply, finally letting go of Alastor’s arm.

“Charlie is fine.” She waves off the title.

“Hon, we need to see if we even like them first.” Someone says behind her. 

"I'm sure we'll like them, Vaggie." She replies to a girl with long pale hair and sooty skin. "This is Vaggie, she’s our Hotel’s Manager .” She smiles, dragging the other girl by the hand. They must be close. The other girl gives you a once over before extending her hand.

“Hi, nice to meet you.” Her tone is way less cheery than her companion, but is at the very least neutral. “You’re one of Alastor’s little… friends?” 

Oh, whatever idea she has of you must be reset at once. “I just had the honor to make his acquaintance last week, Rosie introduced us.” 

Her brow perks up at that. “Wait, these are not— “

“No, Miss, I wouldn't dare.” You assure her. “Rosie has her own special orders. These are the ones we sell at my shop for the general public.” 

“So these are not people pies?” A girlish voice draws your attention below. A short crimson bob frames a single intense eye. “Are you Alastor’s new soul? Are those wings? You smell good!” The petite girl waves, her eye trained on you with a mixture of curiosity and predatory glee. 

“And this is Nifty, our Cleaning Staff.” Alastor introduces.

Ah. “Hi… Nifty, a pleasure to meet you.” You don’t even dare shake her hand.

“Alright that’s enough of introductions,” Vaggie claps stepping forward, “show us the goods, we still got work to do putting this event together.” Her bossy tones gives her away former (current?) military.

You glance at Alastor who merely chuckles before commenting. “She’s always like that.” 

Ah. 

Charlie guides you to the currently unstaffed bar where the tasting boxes were set. “I wish everyone could be here to give their opinion.” She sighs. 

“Babe, as long as you like them it should be enough.” Vaggie is right about that, you think. “Who knows what time Angel will come back and Husk? At this time of morning? Forget about it.”

“Alright, but maybe Dad wants to come down?” She says procuring her cell phone as you get busy setting up the samples—wait, the King of Hell is staying here too?

“Oh don’t bother His Highness, dear, it’s far too early in the morning.” Alastor says, resting a gentle hand over hers. “And hadn’t he been feeling rather… undisposed lately?” 

“Yeah, but I mean he shouldn’t spend so much time holed up there.“ 

“I can set some aside, if you’d like.” You offer, you weren't so eager to meet him, tense and overwhelmed as you are right now.

She smiles, turning to you, “That would be great, thank you.”

“Of course.” She was a breath of fresh air. It’s ironic the Princess of actual literal Hell turned out to be one of the nicest people you met down here. You hand everyone a plate with the pie samples. “Alright so starting from the right  is our shop’s best seller, it’s darkberry with yumava fruit. I should mention our flour is made with a combination of actual topside flour and wheat from the Wrath Ring. We use organic butter from cattle also from Wrath, its brought up by my shop’s assistant. And the sugar comes from... “ You go on about the ingredients and cooking method, watching as their faces go from skepticism to full enjoyment. “I can make the more savory ones as appetizers as well. Princess, I think these would go great with the event if you’re trying to foster a kind of environment sinners can call home and you know what they say, there’s nothing more comforting than homemade pie!” 

Her brows rise at that; Yup, she’s yours. She sets her fork and plate down, grasps your hands coming inches from your face declaring. “We’ll take 100 of each!” Oh Boy.

“What— Charlie, we don’t even know if that many will show up in the first place!” 

“Because we don’t know Vaggie, we should prepare!” And you can’t help but chuckle at her enthusiasm.

“She a funny one.” Alastor comments, having read your mind. 

“Princess, how about we do 10 of each? That would still be plenty.” And more realistic to the numbers of attendees. “I’m sure you’ll have other foods to offer as well.” 

“Okay, yeah, sorry… I’m just kind of nervous, we’ve had a lot of inquiries lately” (‘Five is not a lot,’ the little maid chirps but you pretend not to hear her.) “about the Hotel so I want to make a good impression.” She admits scratching the back of her head and wow, she really does seem to care for this place.

“I understand, Princess, but your friend is right, it be a pity if the food went to waste.” You rest a hand on her shoulder. “But let me write down this really good recipe I know for frazzled nerves in the meantime.” You offer with a smile.

You thank the Princess once more for her business, it has been the smoothest transaction you’ve ever done, half of the commission already paid in advance.

Alastor waits for you, offering his arm again to walk you back to your van.

“She’s great.” You comment,  making your way down the pebbled road leading to the gates.

“That she is, my dear.” He answers, “Nothing like her Father.”

Oh. “Got a beef with the King of Hell?” 

“Hah ha ha!! No, of course not, nothing of the sort...” His frown at odds with his sharp smile. You prod no further as you near your van. “I thought you’d certainly take her initial request for a hundred pies— Oh the hilarity!”

You laugh along with him. “It just didn’t feel right doing that, you know? But maybe it would have been different if she had been a brat.”

He laughs, “Seems like you and I have a lot in common,” and who would have thought? “Well, I’ve delivered you safe and sound to your vehicle, so I’m afraid this is good bye— “

“Wait, Alastor.” You interrupt climbing inside the van, “I have something for you.” You procure a bottle of wine, it’s the kind Rosie said he likes the best. “A thank you gift for everything.” 

He looks from the bottle to you for a brief moment before responding, his head tilting to the side as if deciding how to respond. “Oh My, you shouldn't have!” He says finally bringing the flat of his palm up to refuse. “I cannot accept.”

“Aw, after I went through the trouble?” You shoot him your best hurt puppy dog eyes.

“Hmm.” The soft sound of changing stations comes through the strange filter he emits as his eyes settle on the wine. “Well, who am I to scorn a lady’s thoughtful gift?”

You chuckle, handing him the bottle.

………………….

The next day you stopped by Alicia’s speakeasy to pay the rental for the bakery space, being one of the handful of buildings she owned around the city. Dim cool light welcomes you as you enter, alongside the smell of cheap beer and cigarettes. Goodness knows how you were able to work here every night.

“The usual, Nuria?” Old Vince asks as soon as he sees you take a seat.

“Yes, the usual.” You nod. “Is she busy today?” 

“When is she not, doll. But let me let her know you’re here.” He leaves to get her as soon as he’s done with your drink. You hope Alicia comes quickly. One time you had to wait almost two hours before she remembered you were there. ‘I forgot’ she said, though you’re sure she did it on purpose - never getting over you leaving her employment. You’re gonna be so mad if she makes you do the same, you had some shopping to do today. In the mean time you sit there reviewing your shopping list making sure nothing is missing while you wait. Declining offers for company here and there.

“Hey there, beautiful.” Alicia’s fake affection draws your attention up. Her scaly skin and green eyes glistening in the low ambiance of the bar. Draping dark fins parted to one side to hide the ugly scar at the corner of her mouth.

“Hi Alicia. I’m here to pay rent.” You get to the point, going through your purse to retrieve your wallet.

“Yeah, about that, babe. Rent went up.” 

You have to be kidding. 

“What?! Again?!”

“Yeah, turns out demons from other rings are interested in setting up shop in the city now that we know angels can be handled.” She explains, crossing her arms to inspect her nails.

“Alicia, please don’t do this to me.” This could really affect the rate of your savings, you’re barely making enough of a profit - discounting the debt you have for the equipment, packaging materials, ingredients, electricity, Jo’s wages, the van, and your own personal expenses - your own rent. Why the fuck do you still have to pay rent in hell?!

“I could keep it the same if you came back to perform,” Oh this scummy bitch, “Dezba is long gone, so he can’t tell you what to do anymore!” She snorts mockingly.

“Do not!!” Your voice low as your body moves on its own, jabbing a finger at her chest. “Don't you ever dare bring him up again! Now how much is the increase, you vindictive old bitch!” 

“Twice for that.” She answers, unbothered. 

Fuck!

………………………..

You pour over the budget books back at the pie shop, reviewing receipts and expenses. The careful balancing act that took you months of hardwork and dedication  to get going toppled over by that single one unexpected expense. 

“Relax, Nuria, is not as bad as you’re making it out to be!” Jo tries to console you, hand on your shoulder. “You’re still making enough to cover even the rent increase.”

“But now I can’t save Jo! That’s the issue here! And what happens when the next increase comes? And yeah we’re doing okay right now, but who can say this will always be the case? Will other expenses start increasing too?! When will we ever own a place of our own if— ” 

“Nuria, Nuria! Relax, okay? You still got options, ask Rosie for help.” 

“No, I could never… “  She has been helping you enough, you slump over the table, you want to cry. You know you’re truly in hell when capitalism exists even down here.

Knocking at the front of the bakery pulls you out of your misery, you both look at each other. No deliveries were expected today. Peeking from the corner of the kitchen you spot a tall corpulent figure. You really should invest in a security system, you think in hindsight. You swallow turning one of the lights at the front of the shop.

The light reveals a man dressed in a swanky suit, a manic smile plastered on his face - a poor attempt at friendliness when his shark incarnation speaks to a predatory nature. 

“I told you we should keep at least a gun or two on hand.” Jo whispers.

“You must be Ms. Nuria! May I please come in? I mean no harm, I’m a representative from VoxTek.”

VokTek? You and Jo exchange puzzled glances before you decide to open the door. Jo goes to stand where he kept his studded metal bat for shady situations like this. Not like it could do much if someone with that influence wanted to do something to the shop.

“Yes. How can I help you?”

“Good evening, ma’am. I am here because your lovely pies have been quite a hit at the Network.” Really? That was days ago. “One of our producers would like to extend a warm invitation for you to join us as a special guest for our early morning program, The Vibe!”

Well, this is very unexpected. “I… don’t think I’ve heard of the program before?”

“It’s a talk show, with a focus on celebrity gossip.” Jo supplies.

“Celebrity gossip is such an unpleasant way to put it. The Vibe keeps up with the latest trends, entrepreneurs and entertainers of our time!” The VoxTek representative corrects.

“Then it sounds like my humble pies would be out of place in a show like that.”

“Nonsense, why our very own Velvette gave them her seal of approval.” He flashes his phone with a picture of a very staged-going-for-natural picture of a female demon holding one of your pies, your shop’s box visible right next to her with a caption: Wanted to see what the fuss is about. Gotta say, pie was pretty legit. That was… nice, though why does she look so off-put by it? You don’t get a chance to make more observations as the phone is pulled away and the shark demon extends his hand toward you, “Whaddaya say?” 

“Nuria, if you get on the show we could get more customers and hike up the prices too!” 

"Your imp is right, once in an eternity opportunity!"

“He’s not my imp.” It’s the first thing you clarify. “But I… “ There’s something you don’t like about this, un mal presentimiento, looking at the demon’s hand. But Jo has a point, this one thing could balance the books again. “Alright.” You reply, taking his hand.

He squeezes it hard. His fanged smile doesn't reach his eyes.

“My boss will be delighted, Miss!” 

---

[silly-writes]

Basic rules!

Please read before requesting!!

Mostly I do x reader stuff but I will also write ships!

reader x multiple characters at once (poly stuff) is fine too! Even encouraged >:3c

Asking for non romantic just general headcanons is totally fine too! (Lord knows I have enough lmaoo)

No character suggestion limit!! Go crazyyy !!!!

Please keep everything SFW!! All the characters I write for are underage so let’s all be appropriate

(Canon typical things are fine however ie mentions of hooking up, or mentions of things that are sexual, making out general stuff like that, but please nothing inherently NSFW)

Absolutely nothing non-con

I will write things that have to do with “darker” themes (like SH, suicidal ideation and just general struggle with mental health) so long as they are in no way glorifying or feel they in anyway romanticize mental illness, and I’m in the proper headspace! (These will ALWAYS have proper trigger warnings)

No yandere stuff

No heavy gore (canon typical violence is fine, but not heavy depictions of anything that goes beyond what they would show/mention in the show)

Reader will always be gender neutral unless requested otherwise!

Anything pedophilic or incest or anything like that is an absolute NO (I don’t think I have to say that but u never know)

Characters I won’t write for!!

I write for every character except for the following:

Chris

Chef

Blainley

Sierra

Jo

Staci

Max

Ella

Leonard

Rodney

Any of the 2023 cast (haven’t gotten around to watching yet! Lol!)

Okay that’s all!!

:Dd

[incomingalbatross]

@aslanscompass Thank you for your interest! A lot of the details on the Mel in my head are a little vague, but here's what I've got...

(IMPORTANT NOTE: We brainstormed a fair amount of this together, but at LEAST half of it is my sister's. Due credit to MissAppropriation!)

First of all, Twelve and River definitely had kids on Darillium. This is important to all the rest.

Mel (named after Melody, more or less) is either the daughter or granddaughter of one of these children. The hair obviously comes from the Pond side, and her taste for shenanigans comes from ALL sides. Both traits run in the family.

We're not saying Ms. Frizzle is one of her cousins but we're not saying she's NOT. That's a different story, though.

Mel goes out into the wide cosmos as an adult and gets up to some Adventuring.

Ainley Master, meanwhile, is getting concerned about the increasing amount of Gallifrey Intrigue trying to catch the Doctor in its webs. He's caught wind of the Valeyard plot and is trying to get to the bottom of that before it come to fruition, but he ALSO wants an eye on the Doctor.

He finds Mel, currently presenting herself as a Space Adventuress looking for work, and whose bubbly demeanor reminds him of Jo (which means of COURSE the Doctor will like and trust her). He offers her a job as his inside man in the TARDIS.

Mel, with all the chaos instincts of her lineage, thinks this is absolutely hilarious and also a golden opportunity to be friends with her Grandad when he's younger! Of course she accepts, like a shot.

The "Oh, we're meeting out of order, I'm definitely your companion though" setup at the Trial was at least half a con run by her and the Master. Probably mostly a con. Mel's idea, and no she did NOT properly credit her grandmother.

Anyway, Mel proceeds to have an excellent time with Six and eventually Seven, feeding the Master mostly-harmless information while he, in turn, keeps trying to unravel WHAT exactly was up with the Valeyard and what Gallifrey's gathering darkness might mean for him and the Doctor (HIS best enemy! No one gets to touch him and CERTAINLY not Gallifrey).

Eventually Mel has to leave. Reports are divided on whether she ACTUALLY went on to have adventures with Glitz, or whether she walked into a mysterious object waiting halfway between the TARDIS and the hangars, that soon disappeared without a trace...