#jk I love him so much I was gonna lose it if I didn’t find him

[raplinesmoon]

was literally going to write today but my cat literally decided to disappear into the depths of my house and I spent three hours looking for him and he only came out when he heard me sobbing

[agustdtown1]

SHUT UP ‘N LISTEN | JJK

PAIRING: street racer!brother’s bestfriend!jeon jungkook x fem!reader

SUMMARY: Trust was broken, and wrong decisions were made. You were now left alone facing the consequences of your own actions, realizing it was never a good idea to fuck around with your brother’s friend. But maybe that was another lesson you were meant to learn.

WC: 17.3k

WARNINGS: brother’s best friend trope, angst, like a loooooot, unnecessarily dramatic dialogues that I think were a bit too much but that worked out for the plot at the end. Fluff because I didn’t want to end it on a sad note again. Way too much feelings and emotions. Smut +18, unprotected sex, fingering, oral sex (both receiving), a lot of begging, slight dom!jk, choking, making out, smacking, praising, pet names (doll, good girl, princess, baby, sweetheart, etc.), jk calls reader his good little slut, big dick!jk, mentions of belly bulge (very brief), doggy, missionary, jk begging a little bit towards the end. Let me know if I’m missing anything.

A/N: it’s finally here, the part 2 of shut up and drive, it took me some time to finally get it done, but I’m happy with the results. Also it was initially intended to be max 5k but I got a bit carried away and ended up being this super lengthy one shot so I apologize in advance. Anyway, enjoy your reading!

part 1 | masterlist

Most people experience a variety of emotions throughout their lives; happiness, sadness, anger. You can find happiness in the simple things in life, like buying your favorite food, your favorite drink, or when you go out with your friends. Sadness usually comes along when something bad happens, like losing a loved one or missing an important moment. Anger is presented in the form of violence most of the time, but it can also be delivered through words; hurting just as much as any punch would. Nonetheless, there’s also another emotion that has a huge impact on people, one that can conquer your body in the most unexpected moments.

Fear.

Usually defined as an unpleasant feeling that installs itself in the deepest part of our hearts and souls; fear is that one emotion capable of paralyzing people when faced with dangerous situations. Regardless of it being an abstract concept, like any other feeling, anyone at any point in their life has experienced that same emotion.

It is fear that you feel when you notice a stranger following you at night; it is fear that you feel when encountered with a wild animal. It is fear that goes through your body when someone tells you they have bad news.

And it was that same emotion that you felt when your brother verbalized the one thing you were trying to avoid.

“How long have you been fucking my best friend behind my back?”

It felt like your heart dropped to your stomach the moment that question flew out of Taehyung’s mouth. Nothing would have ever prepared you for it; for the inevitable confrontation you oh so much wanted to avoid.

But life can be funny sometimes, and it would put you through situations that would cause you an unbearable amount of anxiety and fear.

“You’re not gonna say anything?” His voice was the perfect example of exhaustion and disappointment; two emotions you didn’t want your brother to experience.

It took you exactly ninety-eight seconds to regain your ability to speak, only to scramble to find a poor excuse that would get you out of the mess you got yourself into.

“I don’t… um, I don’t really know what—”

“You don’t know what I’m talking about?” Taehyung cut you off. “Is that what you were going to say?”

The words were caught in your throat, making it impossible to give him the answer he was expecting. But then again, would you be able to respond wisely if given the chance to speak properly?

“I’m sorry.”

The answer to that question would be no; you were not capable of forming a valid argument that would make your brother dislike you any less in that precise moment.

“You know, I thought you would finally be honest.” Your brother sighed, shaking his head in disappointment, “I guess I was wrong.”

No man will ever be worthy of messing things up with Taehyung; a mental statement that you prayed would be proven right, but ultimately it seemed like you were the rightful culprit of a crime you didn’t realize you committed.

“Tae, listen…” You began saying, but your brother was not ready to hear whatever you had to say.

“You wanna know what’s funny?” He asked rhetorically. “I’m not even mad that you guys are together or whatever.” Taehyung chuckled, humorlessly. “But you lied to me, and that’s not something I can take lightly.”

You knew that, and yet you decided to go behind his back to mess around with one of his closest friends. In hindsight, the outcome of your web of lies was fully deserved, however, it was hard to accept the possibility of the rupture of you and your brother’s bond.

Hoseok and Jimin, on the other hand, could only stand there and watch everything fall little by little. It saddened them, knowing that the messy situation the three of you were involved in would not be easy to deal with, and most likely would end up badly. Trust was broken, and wrong decisions were made. None of them pondered over enough to realize the weight of the actual problem. But alas, that’s the lesson you were meant to learn.

“Guess loverboy can drive you home tonight, right?” Taehyung’s bitter tone was like a knife digging in your soul. “I’ll talk to you guys later.” He turned towards the two other boys, before retrieving his car keys from his jeans’ pocket.

With nothing left to say, Taehyung started his way back to his car.

“Tae, wait! Don’t be like that.” None the wiser, you tried to reach out and stop him, but someone else got a hold on you before you could.

“Let him be, I think it’s better for everyone if he cools down before you talk to him.” Always the voice of reason, Hoseok intervened at the right time.

It was hard to watch Taehyung walk away, knowing that he would probably let his anger and frustration out the wrong way. It was true that your brother would usually need some time to calm down and come around, just like Hoseok said, however, you also knew that Taehyung could be a bit impulsive and reckless sometimes. His well-being has been put to the test an uncountable amount of times, and more often than not anger would cloud his vision and the only thing he would see is red, which would cause a much bigger problem than him just being upset.

Truth be told, there was not much to do. It was either making the situation a whole lot worse by pushing your brother to his breaking point, or waiting until his anger and frustration had subsided. The latter seemed to be a better option, and so it was decided that you would let it go for the time being.

It couldn’t be that bad, right?

“Y/n…” a familiar voice rang through your ears, making you snap out of your thoughts. “Can we—?”

“Take me home.” You interrupted Jungkook harshly.

Maybe it was the way he was acting so cautiously; or perhaps it was the fact that he didn’t even attempt to explain what was really happening to Taehyung, but the idea of being near Jeon Jungkook for a second longer irritated you beyond belief.

“What?” He seemed to be taken aback, “I mean, yes, I’ll take you home, but first I wanted—”

“I don’t wanna hear it, just take me home.”

The hurt look in his eyes almost made you apologize, but the moment of weakness was short-lived; the frustration and worry you were feeling at that moment were enough to blind you, preventing you from seeing how your cold attitude was affecting him.

“Hoseok…” You started saying, “You coming with us?”

The brown haired man shook his head, sporting a soft grin on his face to break a little bit of the tension surrounding you.

“Don’t worry about me, Jimin’s gonna give me a ride home.”

Looking to his right you found the blond guy nodding his head, confirming that he would take care of Hoseok.

“Alright then.”

You started your way towards Jeon’s car, not really waiting for him; the sooner you got out of there the better. That place was starting to become a horrific nightmare the more you stayed there anyway, and it wasn’t really worth it to wait a second longer.

Jungkook was right behind you, like a silent follower, not uttering a single word due to the fear of being ignored. And somehow he was right about protecting his heart from your cold demeanor, for it was your silence he would get if he had started a conversation in the most inconvenient of times.

But how can you blame him? Had you been in his shoes, conquered by fear of losing the person who makes you feel more alive, along with your best friend, at the same time, you would be scared of saying and doing the wrong thing too. The only difference is that Jungkook wanted to fix things up for the first time. He wanted to redeem himself and be the bigger person for once; changing his usual I-don’t-give-a-fuck attitude and not ignoring his responsibilities. Because as much as he didn’t want to admit it, he was just as guilty as you were, and it was time for him to be held accountable for his own actions and decisions.

Nonetheless, there was still that emotion that would prevent him from initiating a conversation that was already set to happen. Fear was, for lack of better words, fucking him up, just like it did you moments ago.

You could feel his burning stare at every red light you were encountered with, yet you refused to look his way, not giving him the satisfaction of staring at his doe eyes that would lure you into giving him the chance to explain himself. That, however, didn’t prevent him from finally gathering the courage to speak.

“I still wanna talk to you about tonight.” Eight words uttered with fear; a sentence verbalized with the utmost caution, only to fall on deaf ears. “I know you’re not in the mood to have a conversation right now, and you’re most likely mad at me, but I just want you to know that I’m sorry it happened this way.” A sigh escaped his lips, leaving him with a heavy weight on his chest, not fully finding the right words to say. “Things went wrong, that much I know, but neither of us had a way of knowing all of this would go down tonight.”

A humorless chuckle abandoned your mouth, cutting Jungkook’s speech off.

“An apology is not enough to fix all of this, Jungkook.” You started saying. “Taehyung must hate me right now. And for what? Me fooling around with his friend when I should’ve kept my distance.”

Anger, sadness and regret can be demonstrated with a variety of physical acts, but all those emotions can be also delivered through words, hurting as much, hurting even more. Like a knife digging in the soft material of a pillow, your response cut deep in Jungkook’s heart.

An interesting reaction, taking into account that the boy has never, not even once, shown an ounce of weakness around you. It is true that he was softer than most guys when he was with the people he trusted and loved, but there was a slight switch in his attitude when it came down to you. Was it infatuation? Was it stupidity? Jungkook wasn’t sure, but he knew well enough that the things you were saying stung more than they should.

“You say that as if you regretted everything that happened between us.” He dared to speak once again, after pondering what his response should be.

“Maybe I do.”

Why does it hurt so much the words that were flying out of your mouth? Why was the situation affecting him in ways that it shouldn’t?

“Maybe I regret everything, maybe I wish nothing ever happened between us.” You didn’t actually mean it, but people tend to say things that hurt others when they’re angry. “It doesn’t matter if I do, though, you knew this shit wasn’t even worth fighting for.”

Jungkook stopped the car abruptly, ignoring the honking of the van behind you.

“Not worth fighting for?” He repeated, clearly offended. “Are you hearing yourself? You’re acting as if all of this was just my fault”

“I know it wasn’t all on you, I played my part too, but why does it matter so much to you all of a sudden?” You inquired with a venomous tone. “You were the one who said this wasn’t anything serious to begin with. You told me not to get my hopes up because we were just friends who happen to fuck all the time.”

That conversation was engraved on your brain, memorized to the very end. It hurt to repeat the words Jeon said to you, it hurt to remember every single detail of that night, but it was time to accept that neither of you were meant for the other.

He wasn’t yours to take, he wasn’t yours to keep.

And yet you wished that at the end things could be different.

“So it was all meaningless to you?” Jungkook demanded an answer of you.

His heart was beating fast, his hands were starting to sweat and there was a frown falling upon his eyebrows, making him look sort of adorable. For you at least, Jungkook has always been like a big puppy in search of attention, seeking for people’s affection and love when he couldn’t even love himself enough to commit to someone. He was an interesting guy, that much you could admit, but it wasn’t enough to go through the hassle of giving it a try to an already nonexistent relationship.

“You just wanna end things like this?” Jungkook’s mind was going crazy, he couldn’t comprehend how you could act so nonchalant and heartless about it. “I just… I can’t just let you—”

“There’s nothing to end.” You cut him off. “You can’t end something that never started.”

Like cold snow falling upon his face in a swift motion; like a hundred knives digging in his soul and ripping his heart out; like the most saddening ballad cutting deep in someone’s mind to bring back the memories of a past lover.

It all hurt the same, it all happened as fast. It all was just equally awakening.

“Is that what you want?”

Jungkook’s dead voice wounded you just a little, but it wasn’t enough to stop your answer.

“Yes, that’s what I want.” You confirmed.

Without wasting any other second, Jeon started the car again, letting out a heavy sigh while maintaining a hard grip on the wheel.

And for better or for worse, not a single word was uttered the rest of the ride to your house; representing the finish line of a race that never even started.

Seven days, four hours, twenty minutes and thirty-two seconds. That’s how long it has been since the last time you heard the voice of your brother, or even knew anything about him, for that matter. Seven days since you last saw him; seven days since one of your biggest fears came true; seven days since Taehyung looked at you right in the face with an expression full of discomfort and disappointment, one that he has never shown until now. Seven days since Jungkook tried to talk you out of ending things with him.

Seven days have passed and not much has changed, besides the fact that you have felt lonelier than before. The monotonous routine of attending lectures, studying, going to work and then coming back home alone was damaging your mental health and your stability was starting to decay. Sadly, you didn’t have anyone else to blame but yourself. It was a hard pill to swallow, but in the end it was all the consequences of your impulsive actions.

Had you thought about everything more thoroughly, the outcome would have been way different. No one would have felt betrayed, because you wouldn’t have had the need to hide anything from anyone to begin with. No one would have gone home feeling broken or with a heavy weight on their shoulders.

A lot of things would have been different, but rather than dwelling on the matters that have already happened, you decided to keep your mind at bay.

Work and school kept you occupied, but it didn’t relieve the pain that was poisoning your weak heart whenever you received a message or a call from someone who wasn’t Taehyung. His two friends kept you updated about how he was doing, but it wasn’t enough for you; you needed to hear it from the guy himself. Which seemed to be a task rather difficult due to the current situation.

Jungkook tried to reach out to you a few times after that night, but on the fourth day of calling and texting you nonstop, he finally let go of the idea of fixing things up, with one final text where he poured his full heart, just for you. If Jeon had been any more honest at some other point in his life, he didn’t acknowledge it. For him that long text was his truest self, his bare feelings abandoning his body with the hope of reaching you on time. Nonetheless, you two were living in different realities, it seems. You didn’t even dare to read the message, opting to block him and ignore how unhealthy and wrong it was to act that way.

It was unfair of you to treat him so poorly, but your pride stopped you from seeing the bigger picture. You were at fault, in the same way that Jungkook was; both of you took the decision to intertwine your bodies that one night, and both of you decided to maintain the secret encounters. It was a crime committed by two bodies, but that sadly left three broken hearts behind. Two at fault and one caught in the crossfire.

You’ve caught yourself wishing you would’ve done things differently; no secrets, no betrayal. No guilt, no fear. However, it was that same predicament that led you to meeting Jungkook, and as much as you didn’t want to admit it, you were grateful for that. Behind his fuckboy persona there was a kindhearted guy that not everyone knew, but that you wish could be yours; Jeon was, for lack of better words, the type of guy that any girl would love to have as a partner, but alas you wouldn’t be the one to experience it.

And that cold and saddening truth was what prevented you from ignoring your pride and reaching out to him.

“Y/n…” a distant voice called your name. “Y/n!”

Looking up from your long-forgotten class review, you stared at one of your closest friends, Eunbi. She was a 5’6, black-haired girl, with the personality of a fifty-year-old woman trapped in the body of a twenty-three-year-old girl. In better words, she was your best friend. You met her during orientation and you two hit it off right away; have been inseparable ever since.

“I’ve been calling you for a solid minute.” She chuckled lightly. “You okay there?”

You sighed, taking off your glasses to rub your eyes. An annoyed groan wanted to leave your mouth, but you were quick to suppress it before making any unwanted noise while being at the library.

“Yeah, I’m fine, just tired I guess.”

Eunbi looked like she knew you weren’t completely honest, however, she didn’t push any longer for an answer and you were grateful for that. You weren’t in the mood to explain the whole disaster you were into with your brother and his best friend.

“Wanna stop here and go grab some coffee? I’m kinda tired too.”

You wanted to decline and keep studying, but truth be told, if you kept up the act of trying to busy your mind with anything to keep it away from the topic you didn’t want to speak about, it would damage you more than it already has. So the distraction was greatly appreciated and a decision was rapidly made.

“Yeah, I could use some caffeine.”

Both of you abandoned your comfortable seats at the library, gathering your belongings to start your way out to the nearest coffee shop. The breeze caressed your skin with its refreshing wind; there has been a sudden change in the weather that has put the barely tolerable heat on pause. The gray clouds were adorning the sky, which in result made you curse under your breath for not having an umbrella with you.

“Seems like it’s going to rain.” Eunbi lamented, for she didn’t bring anything to protect herself from the water either. “We better hurry to get there before it starts.”

Your gaze moved slowly down from the gloomy sky, observing your surroundings with a deep sigh trapped in your throat. The saddening weather didn’t help you to cheer up, but maybe the tall guy waiting for you a few feet away would.

It took you a few seconds to realize that it was your brother who was waving at you while leaning on the hood of his car. Taehyung seemed relaxed and nonchalant, clearly not aware of the immense joy that he had brought upon you by just being there, due to finally seeing him after so long.

“Tae?” A small whisper fell from your lips. “Eunbi, can we raincheck? I um… My brother’s here.” You looked over your friend on the side, while smiling apologetically at her.

“Of course, don’t worry about me. We can have that coffee another day.” A soft smile was all you received after that, while your friend made her way home.

Uncertainty was quickly taking its place in your chest, making it a bit difficult for you to be calm and collected. There was a weird feeling making your fingers tingle, while your skin got coated with goosebumps; one that you rapidly disclosed as fear.

You feared the reason your brother was at your university. You feared the inevitable conversation you most likely will have with him, but above all, you feared the outcome of said conversation, scared it might break you more than the whole situation already has.

Your heart was pounding rapidly against your chest while you were, albeit reluctantly, walking towards Taehyung. His soft grin didn’t mirror your awkward grimace, already creating a tense atmosphere between you two.

“What… What are you doing here?” Your question came out rather strongly, in comparison to how nervous you were. “Aren’t you supposed to be working?”

Taehyung nodded, looking down at his feet for a brief second.

“Am I not allowed to come see my little sister?”

No, when you haven’t contacted her in a whole week, you’re not.

“I guess so.” You finally answered, opting to take the easy route and avoid arguing at all costs.

“Get in, I don’t want you getting sick because of the weather.”

A simple sentence that held a lot of meaning behind. Not only was it the fact that Taehyung finally had the courage to present himself in front of you, but he also continued to care for you, even when the prospect of the bond shared between the two being more than broken by now was a possibility he strongly believed in.

Regardless of the initial surprise that painted your face and that invaded your heart, you followed his words and entered the car, tossing your things into the backseat. The ride to your house was filled with an awkward silence, neither of you daring to talk due to not knowing what to say to make things better. Your brother would often sigh and look at you, only to give you a tight-lipped smile and continue driving.

It was safe to say that things were far from being like they used to be, at least for now. It had never been a problem to start and maintain a conversation with the older guy sitting next to you, but it seems like now it was a complete torture for the both of you to be in and share the same space.

A pang of guilt struck your chest for the awkward situation you were found in. A little voice at the back of your head telling you that it was all your fault, and that you should do something quickly to fix it up.

The truth was that you, once again, didn’t know how. It was uncharted territory, not even once in your life had you been in a predicament such as the one you were currently living. It was safe to say that you didn’t know what to do.

Despite being clueless and frustrated, you finally found the courage to form a coherent sentence to break the uncomfortable silence. And it was with a shaky hand fisting your skirt and trembling lips that you finally spoke.

“So… It’s not like I’m complaining or anything, but why exactly did you come to pick me up?” You inquired, staring right at him “You’ve never done that before.”

Truth be told, Taehyung didn’t think this through, he didn’t even imagine he would get this far; the only thing he knew for sure was that he didn’t like the current situation. It was already hard to digest the news of you and his best friend being somewhat together —at least from his perspective that’s what it was—, to add the burden of not being on good terms with you to the pile of concerns that Taehyung had.

On top of that, he felt guilty. Guilty for being so hard on you, guilty for not letting you explain yourself, guilty for not caring enough about you and Jungkook’s feelings before shutting both of you out. But then again, it was a normal reaction, one that was expected from him.

It was due to that that Taehyung decided it was finally time to talk with you and sort everything out, the only thing he didn’t foresee was how awkward and hard it would be to communicate with you after a week.

“Well…” He drifted off, stopping at a red light. “We need to talk… But I think it’s better if we do that once we’re at your place.”

It was decided, and silence had, once again, conquered the space inside Taehyung’s expensive car. You didn’t bother to try to break it this time, opting to save all your energy for the, most probably, draining conversation that you and your brother would have in a matter of minutes.

The moment you saw your building becoming nearer and nearer you let out a sigh of relief. Being trapped in such a small space with such high and thick tension engulfing both of you was making you feel upset. You were thankful for the fresh air gracing your face once you stepped out of Taehyung’s car, however, your joy was short-lived due to the cold droplets of water falling rapidly from the sky.

“Hurry up inside.”

Both of you made your way quickly towards the entrance, not sparing a second glance to your landlord at the door, but rather walking straight into the elevator.

Once you were in the warm insides of your apartment, you finally let your shoulders slump, while a tired groan abandoned your lips. Taehyung followed suit, taking his shoes off at the door and walking towards your living room.

“Make yourself at home, I’ll go change.” You shared before going into your room.

Comfortable clothes, that’s what you were seeking for. If a disaster was bound to go down, at least you would be wearing your soft pair of pajama shorts and that one shirt you stole from Jimin when you were over at his and your brother’s apartment.

It was a matter of a few minutes before you encountered Taehyung once again. His eyes were locked on his phone screen, looking rather entertained by whatever he was watching.

“I’m back.” You informed him, while taking a seat next to him. “Do you… perhaps wanna talk now?”

Hesitance and curiosity were invading your mind and soul at the moment, making you feel uneasy. You shouldn’t be so aggravated or feel so anxious, it was your brother sitting beside you, not a stranger. But then again, you weren’t prepared for the conversation, and instead of taking things easy, you were overthinking every single thing about it.

“I don’t really know how to start this.” Taehyung avoided looking at you, which in result caused you to feel hurt. “I wanna say a lot of things but I don’t think I have enough words to express them.” He chuckled lightly, fidgeting with his fingers while looking right into his lap. “I’m gonna start with the obvious. I was mad, that night at the race, I got really upset. I don’t know what pushed you to make the decision of hiding such a thing from me, but it really hurt Y/n.”

You knew that already. You knew that you fucked up and that it affected Taehyung more than he would like to admit, but it was the path you chose, the only thing left to do was walk through it and accept all the consequences.

“There was no need, you know?” It was then that he looked at you. “Like I told you that night, I wasn’t upset about you two being together and I never would. What you do with your love life or who you decide to be with is none of my business. I can’t stop you from liking someone, even if that someone is my best friend.” Taehyung let out a sigh, searching for the right words to say. “I got mad because you lied to me. I don’t like when you do that or hide things from me, it makes me feel as if you don’t trust me. And I really don’t want to think that’s the case.”

“It’s not!” You were quick to say, already fearing he would get the wrong idea. “I swear I trust you, you are the only person I actually confide the majority of my life to.” You sighed, feeling a heavy weight on your chest. “I’m sorry I made you feel that way.”

“I think it’s partially my fault. Maybe I haven’t been doing a good job at being a trustworthy brother.”

You wanted to say no, to make him stop thinking that way about himself, but he didn’t give you the time.

“What I want to say is… I might have been mad at you, at Jungkook and at the whole situation, but I’m also sorry for how I reacted.” Taehyung finally let out the words that were bugging him ever since that night. “I’m sorry I shut you out completely for this long, and I’m sorry for not talking things through sooner. I can’t control the decisions you make, and most importantly I shouldn’t be upset about the guys you get involved with. I just…” Taehyung drifted off. “I was just worried about you getting hurt that I didn’t notice the big mistake I made. I didn’t take into account your feelings and how my words would hurt you and for that I’m so fucking sorry.”

Seven days, five hours and fifteen minutes. That’s how long it took to finally hear your brother’s voice again. That’s how long it took to finally sort things out. That’s how long it took Taehyung to say those awaited words.

Seven days passed, and not even once you stopped thinking about what would happen if you were to have the opportunity to explain everything.

Until now.

“Taehyung,” You whispered, “you don’t need to apologize, I should be the one apologizing. It was so fucked up of me going behind your back and messing around with Jungkook.” You sighed. “I didn’t think things through and it almost cost me your trust and love, and for that you have no idea how sorry I am.”

Taehyung smiled softly at you, reaching out to squeeze your hand.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself.” He said.

“I’m not, I’m just being honest.” You lightly argued. “Still, I’m sorry for lying to you, for hiding things from you, for… For messing around with your best friend. You didn’t deserve any of it.” A tight-lipped grin was sent his way. “I promise I won’t do anything like that again, I value our bond more than any quick fuck.”

Taehyung hissed, retrieving his hand from yours.

“When you say it like that it sounds weird.”

You chuckled, poking his side in a playful manner.

“Hey, I’m trying to be serious here, don’t ruin the moment.” You complained.

“I’m sorry, but it’s weird listening to my little sister saying she had a quick… well, that.” He grimaced, shaking his head to prevent himself from getting any unwanted mental image of it.

“It’s not like you don’t do it.” You scoffed, feeling suddenly defensive. “But that’s not the point of this conversation. What I really wanna know is… Are we good? Do you forgive me?”

Taehyung smiled at you sweetly, “Only if you forgive me too.”

It was a no brainer. You would do anything to go back to normality, to have your brother in the same way you have always had him. To not be scared of saying or doing the wrong thing; to finally be free of lies and secrets.

“I do.” You responded cheerfully.

You found yourself wrapping your arms around his torso, while resting your head on his shoulder. One of Taehyung’s hands came up to caress your hair, sweetly, while the other was softly patting your back. You were finally where you needed— wanted to be, and somehow it still felt weird.

There was a feeling of something missing, like a part of you was still holding onto an invisible string, tying you to someone whom you weren’t ready to face just yet. It didn’t take much to figure out why you were feeling that way, but it only served to leave you with more doubts and confusion.

Why was your heart calling his name? Why was your soul hurting for him? Why was your mind thinking of him?

All those questions were left unanswered, although you already knew the reason. The line between accepting the hard truth and ignoring your feelings was so thin that you didn’t even notice when you crossed it, but you definitely felt it. Like salt rubbed on a fresh wound, your heart ached just as much when the thought of Jungkook finally letting go of you was presented in your mind. That’s mostly why your heart, mind and soul were so desperately seeking his presence.

Maybe that’s even why you would tear up at night while staring at your phone. Waiting for a text, for a call, for anything that would let you know that even in some twisted reality, Jeon Jungkook felt the same for you.

“Youf shouf call hif.”

Eunbi was stuffing her face with a fresh baked bagel, not really minding how little you could understand about what she was saying, due to her full mouth.

“Could you please swallow your food before speaking? I can’t understand you.” A grimace took place on your face, while watching your friend enjoy her food.

You weren’t against Eunbi being so openly in love with whatever she was eating, but there was a limit for your patience when it came to eating etiquette.

“I said…” She finally swallowed the bite she took. “You should call him.”

A confused look was sent her way, while you took a sip of your iced coffee.

“Whom?” You asked, looking at her quizzically. “Be more specific, I just told you about what’s been going on in my life and I mentioned a lot of people.”

It took some convincing but Eunbi finally got all the gossip out of you. It was weird at first, to confess to someone else rather than to the people involved in the problem about everything that happened, let alone about your painfully obvious feelings. Because, although you weren’t ready to openly admit it yet, Eunbi didn’t need to know much to understand what was really happening in that complicated heart of yours.

“Your brother’s friend.” She answered after taking a sip of her drink. “That guy, Joncook.”

“Jungkook.” You corrected her with an annoyed sigh. Whether she has been purposely pronouncing his name wrong or she seriously couldn’t remember it, you didn’t know. “I already told you his name is Jungkook.”

“Potato, potahto.” Eunbi shrugged, cleaning her mouth after finishing her food. “Point stands. Call him.”

“Why would I? Didn’t you listen to anything I just said?” You asked thoroughly confused, “Clearly he’s not into me, otherwise he wouldn’t have said that it was a no strings attached type of thing.”

Eunbi wanted to hit you in the head to knock some sense into you. It was obvious, not only to her but to anyone who came across you two during those months of secret encounters. Jungkook, the rebellious and cold hearted man that anyone deemed as the raunchiest fuckboy, but that surprisingly most people would be willing to fuck. That’s who Jungkook was, but for Eunbi, for his friends and even for your own brother, Jeon was just a guy afraid to show his real feelings for you.

Almost too sickeningly cute, with his doe eyes and dumb smile, ready to go to the ends of the Earth to make you laugh or at least get a grin out of you. It was so painfully obvious to anyone but you how badly in love he was. It wasn’t infatuation, although at first it was a huge possibility; it wasn’t a simple crush despiste starting as one. It went beyond that, beyond the weak barriers of taking a liking of his best friend’s sister. It was more than just saying that he thought you were attractive, although he clearly thought that.

Jeon Jungkook had it bad for you. But how could you be able to see that?

The only face he would ever show you was one full of indifference, overconfidence and nonchalance; adorned with a smug smile and a pair of darkened eyes that warned you with a simple look that pure chaos was about to ensue. However, he did treat you differently than most girls. Jungkook would never get out of his bed at one in the morning just because your friends ditched you at a bar at the very last minute and you were too scared to call an Uber or a taxi.

He’s never remembered the coffee order of the girls he’s hooked up with, but oddly enough he remembers the exact amount of sugar you like in yours; Jungkook wouldn’t even remember their names. But yours? Yours was embroidered on the very front of his brain, not willing to erase it, not willing to forget it. Your order would be the first thing that comes to his mind every time he’s at a coffee shop, and more often than not he’s made the mistake of ordering yours instead of his, only to realize what he did a second too late. Your name was always at the tip of his tongue, risking his opportunity to fuck a random girl he met at a party. All because he almost said your name.

All those things were unmistakable, not easy to be looked over or ignored.

But once again, how could you be able to notice that the man was head over heels for you? When you wouldn’t even let your heart accept its own feelings.

“Do I really need to say it?” Eunbi deadpanned, staring at you with an annoyed look. “My god, Y/n, you’re not usually this dumb!”

“Excuse you?” You look offended, and rightfully so, but you were also ignoring the fact that your friend was just trying to make you see the obvious. “You’re being mean right now.”

“And you’re not being reasonable.” She sighed in exhaustion. “At least think about it, alright? If what you told me it’s anything to go by, that boy has it bad for you.”

Thinking is all you did, thinking is all you knew; it seemed to be like an easy task, but in hindsight it was way more difficult. It took you two more days to actually come to the conclusion that Eunbi may be right, and for those two days your mind didn’t have a peaceful moment to even worry about your upcoming exams. Your brain was completely fried at that point, full with possibilities and theories of what the outcome of finally confronting Jungkook might be.

The first possible outcome was the least feared out of the thousands.

If you were to reach Jungkook through a text, he would not reply. Now, that wasn’t really that bad, and in a more down to earth mindset, it would be completely deserved. Your not so reasonable side of your brain reassured you that he would and most likely will reply to any text you send him. Why wouldn’t he, after all?

The second possible outcome was one that you didn’t want to acknowledge.

If you were to call him, Jungkook would hang up after telling you to fuck off for not reaching out sooner. Seemed fitting and a very Jungkook-thing to do, but still you wished for that scenario to be false.

The last one was the worst among the assumptions swimming through your head. If you were to finally confess your feelings… he would reject you.

Rejection as a whole seemed like a terrifying experience. People would often avoid getting to that point, whether it would be them facing rejection or being the culprit of someone else’s broken heart. You had been on both sides, had gone through both experiences; it wasn’t anything you would like to live again. Hence to why you were trying so hard to suppress your feelings.

Poor and weak heart of yours, it didn’t choose who you love, but it certainly chose who you hurt. And as it turns out, it wasn’t only your brother who got caught in the crossfire.

Ever since you were a kid, flowers made you feel at ease. Their smell, their texture, even their bright colors. Anything about flowers was as relaxing as a day at the beach, at least for you.

You grew to be that one girl completely enamored with nature, and your fascination for flowers was only enhanced once you realized that people would use them as a token of love and appreciation for others. It was romantic, it was pure, it was honest. Gifting flowers to those who you loved and appreciated, to those who you held close to your heart, was such a kind and lovely gesture.

It was the purest act of love you could come across.

The meaning behind every kind of flower was such a wonderful thing to discover. Daisies were often a symbol of happiness and purity; whereas hydrangeas symbolize comfort in times of sorrow, especially at funerals. Orchids often represented beauty and strength, as well as the flowers birds of paradise. Roses, often associated with deep passion and love, had variations in meaning due to their colors; they could represent innocence and purity if they were white, or friendship and warmth if they were yellow.

However, among all those types of flowers, the ones you were holding in your hands at the moment were the hardest ones to carry with you. For no other reason than their meaning.

Striped carnations were often known for representing regret and remorse. They were used to apologize for past actions or mistakes.

It seemed fitting, so you bought the bouquet when you passed by a flower shop on your way to Jungkook’s house.

It took you way too long, but it was after one decisive night in that lonesome room of yours, fighting back the tears while finally reading those soft and beautiful words Jungkook used to pour his heart out, to confess his unmistakable love for you, that you finally made the decision. It was now or never, whatever the outcome of this might be, you’d face it and endure it.

So it was with shaky hands and wobbly legs that you carried yourself to Jeon’s apartment, holding the flowers tightly, afraid that they might disappear if you loosen the grip.

Several seconds passed with you standing outside his door, fearing that if you knocked reality might finally hit you in the face with the bitter truth: Jungkook didn’t want you anymore.

“Are you gonna stand there all day, or you’ll finally let me get in my house?”

That husky and seductive voice. It was hard to miss and hard to mistake it for anyone else’s. That particular voice tone has been playing in your head ever since the night everything went down. It was obvious who it belonged to, and the undeniable fact only made your nerves reach a whole new level.

“See, I wouldn’t usually complain about a pretty girl standing outside my door, but I really need to get these bags inside.” Jungkook didn’t seem bothered by your presence, and even if he did you would never notice.

Maybe you made the right choice to come and finally talk, or maybe you didn’t.

Truth was that as it has been stated many times before, you were very oblivious, so it would be no surprise if you read the room wrong. But then again, he called you pretty, right? Wouldn’t that count for something?

“I— Yes! Fuck, sorry, I didn’t know you weren’t home.”

First apology of the night; many more to come.

“Would you mind helping me get my keys?” The dark-haired man in front of you turned around, just the right amount to insinuate that you grab the keys from his back pocket. “The left one.”

Hesitantly, you reached out and dug into his pocket to retrieve the keys and give them to him. There was a light and soft touch when your fingers brushed that sent a slight shiver through your body.

It has been so long since the last time you were this close to Jungkook that you were already forgetting his touch, his smell and the way he could mesmerize you with a single look.

“Come on in.” Jeon led the way inside his house. “Get comfortable while I put this away.”

Jungkook was quick to make his way to the kitchen, getting the groceries out of the bags and setting everything in their respective place. It was hard for you to loosen up and get comfortable in a space that became foreign to you. Had it been any other time, you wouldn’t have thought twice before sitting on the couch, or even following him to the kitchen to tell Jungkook about your day while he loaded his fridge with meat and veggies. But now it was different. Now you felt an increasing tension between you two, which made you stand stiff in the middle of his living room, rethinking your decision of finally confronting him.

It was not that you were a coward —maybe you were— but more so the fact that you didn’t know how to have a proper and serious conversation with the guy in question. The talk you had with your brother was orchestrated by Taehyung himself, you only chimed in to apologize profusely, which shouldn’t have been enough but seemed to be more than sufficient for your brother. However, this time the ball was in your court, you were meant to do the talking while Jungkook was expected to listen attentively or at least pretend he was.

Maybe you should’ve thought this through before putting your plan into action, but it was too late to back down now, and in all honesty, you weren’t sure if you were capable to postpone this conversation any longer.

“I gotta admit, when Taehyung told me you were planning on paying me a visit I didn't believe him.” Jungkook’s voice rang through your ears once again, he walked back from the kitchen, becoming aware of your quizzical look. “Oh, he didn’t tell you we were back on friendly terms, I see.” He chuckled, beckoning you to sit on the couch with him.

Not only did your brother omit the fact that he was back to being friends with Jungkook, but also he couldn’t keep his mouth shut about your plans of finally talking to Jeon, which made you upset by default. You thought that by now secrets and hiding things would have been out of the picture between you and Taehyung, but it looked like it was only you who decided to go down the path of honesty.

“You two… Is everything okay between you and my brother?” It was only fair to ask, although you already knew the answer.

Jungkook nodded, looking away from you.

“He called me a few days ago to talk, and well…” He drifted off. “I would say that everything’s back to normal.”

“That’s good.” You nodded.

It truly was. It might not seemed like it, but you were equally concerned about their bond being broken as you were about yours with your brother. It would deeply pain you to know that they couldn’t continue to be the best of friends after the incident. It sent you a sense of relief that they were on good terms again, at least you didn’t have to worry about ruining their friendship anymore.

“Are those for me?” His sudden question made you blink repeatedly. “The flowers, I mean.”

Looking down at your lap you realized that you were still tightly holding the bouquet of striped carnations.

“Oh… yes, they’re for you.” Your hands moved slowly to softly place the bouquet on Jungkook’s palm.

“Why thank you.” He seemed surprised. “Usually I’m the one gifting flowers, not the other way around, so this is a first. Although, I don’t know if I should feel flattered or concerned that you’re giving me…” Jungkook stopped for a moment to look at the flowers more attentively. “Striped carnations.”

Of course he knew the meaning of the flowers. When has Jungkook not made you feel like a total idiot due to his undeniable intelligence?

“Yeah, well…” You drifted off, not really knowing what to say.

The dark-haired guy let out a soft sigh, while the ghost of a smile took place on his lips.

“Why are you here, Y/n?” Jungkook asked, silently urging you to answer honestly. “We both know you’re not here just to deliver these.”

You took a deep breath, avoiding his eyes for a second. In theory, it shouldn’t be this hard to answer his question or to start the speech that you have been memorizing all these days, but it was easier said than done. It was as if all the words in the English language had vanished from your brain, and you were left with dumb sounds that wouldn’t help your case.

“Maybe I should change my question.” Jungkook placed the flowers on this coffee table, before speaking again. “Are you sure you want to go through this today? It’s obvious you came here to talk about us, but how I see it, you might not be ready for it yet.”

You shook your head, squirming in your place to find a more comfortable position.

“I wanna do this, I really do.” You assured him. “I just don’t know how to start.”

The tattooed man nodded, carefully sliding a bit closer to you.

“Maybe you can start by telling me why you gave me those flowers.”

Jungkook, bless his heart, always knew how to get the best out of you. It was easy for him to get people to talk about things they didn’t even know they needed to let out. It almost made you think he had some sort of magic going on that would compel others to be open about their feelings.

“They… They symbolize regret.” You finally answered. “They’re usually given when you want to apologize to someone.”

It was certainly easier to explain the meaning than to actually do it, but it must count for something, right?

“Mhmm.” He hummed, waiting for you to continue with your explanation. “Why give them to me then?”

“Because I want to apologize to you.” There, you finally said it, there was no going back. “I’m sorry, Jungkook.” Taking a deep breath you continued. “I’m sorry about what happened that night, I’m sorry for the way I treated you afterwards; I’m sorry for putting all the blame on you when I was just as guilty. I’m so fucking sorry for the things I did and said.”

You felt like you could finally breathe, like a weight was slowly lifting off your shoulders.

“You didn’t deserve any of that.” Tears were starting to cloud your vision. “I didn’t mean it when I said I wished I didn’t meet you. It was so stupid of me to say it, getting to know you has been one of the most complicated yet amazing things that have happened to me. And I’m truly sorry that I wasn’t able to show it.”

Jeon reached out to wipe away the tears that were starting to run down your cheeks.

“Please don’t cry.” He begged, almost too quietly.

It pained him how aggravated and distressed you were, right in front of him. Jungkook knew it was only right for you to apologize but it wasn’t fair that you were suffering so much when he was at fault too.

“I’m sorry too.” He finally apologized. “I did things wrong, I shouldn’t have agreed to hide all of this from Taehyung. I knew we weren’t doing the right thing, but I let it slide because it meant I could have you longer.”

Jeon regretted how things went down, but it would be a lie if he said he didn’t enjoy his time with you. Jungkook knew that the moment the truth was out, it would only complicate everything for the both of you; not to mention that he was scared that Taehyung would prohibit him from being near you. Jungkook was so weak for you that he couldn’t stand the possibility of losing you so easily. And so it was decided that it would be kept as a secret for as long as you two deemed necessary. However, he didn’t really think that the outcome would be so painful.

“I just… I couldn’t bear not being with you. I couldn’t let you go.” Jungkook confessed. “I’m sorry. A lot of things would’ve been different if I did.”

“No.” You shook your head. “Even if you tried, I wouldn’t have let it happen.” You brushed the tears away, trying to keep your composure. “Could you please forgive me? I don’t… I don’t want you to hate me”

You were silently praying that the answer to your question would be yes. It scared you that he reserved the right to reject you and move on with his life. After all, it wouldn’t surprise you if he did, it would be rightfully deserved.

However, Jungkook once again proved to you that he was way different from what you picture him to be.

“I already forgave you, sweet cheeks.”

His smile, oh how much you missed his smile. It was the rainbow you needed to see after a storm. Like a warm blanket during a snowy day. Like the comfort you seeked when everything outside was falling apart.

It was so him, and it almost brought you back to tears when you finally saw it. Shining so bright and pretty on his face.

“And I’m afraid that there’s nothing you could do to make me hate you.” His hand reached out to cup your cheek, making you lean into his touch. “Would you be willing to forgive me too? I know I hurt you with the things I’ve done, but–”

“Yes. I forgive you, Kook.” You smiled at him softly.

“That means we’re good, right?”

If only it was that easy.

There was one thing that was still bothering you and it was the unmistakable feelings for the boy in front of you. Confessing has always been hard, but when it comes to confessing your feelings to Jeon Jungkook, it was ten times worse.

“Actually, there’s something I still need to talk about.” You approached the matter carefully.

“What is it?” Jungkook felt uneasy, he didn’t know what else you had to say, but it was making him nervous. As if he knew something bad would happen. “Are you still upset?”

“No! No, no, it’s not that.” You assured him. “I… it might be a dumb question but… That text, the one you sent me the last time you tried to reach out to me.”

Why was it so hard to say it?

“Did you mean it, all of it?”

A sigh abandoned Jungkook’s lips, and the hand that was once holding your face, slowly retrieved to fall on his lap.

That was it, he was gonna reject you. That was the thought running through your head. His lack of response set a crack in your heart, making you feel vulnerable, making you feel dumb. It was obvious what his answer was going to be, why did you even have to ask?

“You read it?” Jungkook finally spoke. “I thought you simply decided to ignore it.”

You sighed, feeling ashamed of your actions.

“I did at first. I mean, I only got to read it as of recent because I… might have blocked you.” You cringed after finally confessing what you did. “I know it was childish, trust me, but I was mad at the time and I thought it was for the better.”

Jungkook simply nodded, showing you a reassuring smile.

“So yes, I read it, and I would be lying if I said it didn’t surprise me.” You looked like in his eyes. “That’s why I’m asking… Did you really mean it?”

The words adorning your screen late at night while you were reading the long paragraph he sent you were engraved in your brain. It was all memorized at this point. You spent night after night reading every single word while tears were spurting out of your eyes, lamenting that you didn’t open his message sooner.

I would never forgive me for the pain I’ve caused you.

I’m sorry for being a coward and not saying this to your face.

You already knew how sorry he was, not only because he apologized only a few seconds ago, but Jungkook also poured his heart and soul into that message, letting you know how deeply sorry he felt for what he put you through.

This is me being honest, this is me being true to myself.

The confession was the hardest part to read, but it was equally shocking and relieving to know that…

I wish I could say this to you, face to face.

He indeed…

But I can’t hide it any longer.

Felt the same…

I love you, Y/n.

For you.

“I did. I meant it, with my whole heart.” Jungkook smiled at you, sweetly, delicately, lovingly. He wanted to express his love for you in any way he could, in every gesture, every word, every smile. “I don’t know if I might regret this later or not, but what I know is that I don’t want to act as if I weren’t so madly in love with you.”

His answer drew a gasp out of you. It was one thing reading his confession and getting to know his real feelings for you, but listening to him say it out loud was a new, different experience.

Jungkook looked at you as if you held the world in the palm of your hands, as if you were the remedy for his pain; as if you were the only person worth fighting for. And maybe you were. He’s never felt any sort of feeling that could come close to the emotions he has experienced and continues to experience with you. His heart has never beaten so hard to the point of feeling as if it were to escape from his chest. It only felt like that when he was around you.

You were the reason for Jungkook's many sleepless nights, when Jeon could only think of every little detail about you that he loved so much. Your laugh, your smile, the way a frown would be adorning your face when you try to concentrate, or how adorable you look while playing with any pet you come across.

It was so hard for him to get you out of his mind; so difficult to erase the feeling of your skin burning against his, of your lips traveling all around his body to leave marks that he prayed would last a lifetime, because maybe that way, at least a part of you would stay within himself.

“I know you might not feel the same.” His husky voice echoed through the walls of his living room after a moment of silence. “And I didn’t say all those things in hopes you would reciprocate my feelings. I just couldn’t keep hiding it anymore.”

His words were running through your mind, as a distant noise. You wanted to say a lot of things, to scream from the top of your lungs that you loved him just as much, or maybe even more than he did you. But your brain and mouth weren’t connected, as it seems, because instead of putting an end to both of your sufferings, you opted to ask him:

“How long have you felt this way?”

Jungkook sighed, reminiscing about all the moments where he felt like falling in love with you. There weren’t that many, in all honesty, but every single one of them felt like the loveliest of dreams.

“I’m not entirely sure.” He confessed. “Maybe it was when I first met you and you were so nervous around me that you even tripped over your feet and fell onto me.” A smile was slowly appearing on his face, “Or perhaps it was when I picked you up from your friends house that one night. You were absolutely hammered and babbling about one of your friends doing a backflip while drinking a shot.”

“I was a complete mess that time.”

It was embarrassing to remember that night. You drank and ate so much that you ended up emptying your stomach the moment you walked in your house. The majority of it was a blur, but despite your clouded memory you could still remember the silly things you were saying to Jungkook.

It also happened to be the first time you almost confessed your feelings for him.

“You say that, but back then I thought that you were the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen, with that green dress and your rosy cheeks.” Jungkook reached out to caress your face with his thumb. “The way you smiled at me that night… it was so hard for me not to kiss you until I lost breath.”

His words felt like a warm hug to your heart. Love is always a nightmare when you fall alone, and for so long you felt like it was only you who felt the chemistry between the two.

“Truth is, that I don’t know when or how I fell for you, it just naturally happened.” He smiled at you, cupping your cheek once again. “And I think it’s your fault I fell this hard.” Before you could protest, he continued. “How could I not develop feelings when you’re such a lovable person, Y/n. So caring, kind and beautiful through and through. Anyone would be lucky to have you in their life and call you theirs.”

“Do it then.” A clear and determined glint was adorning your eyes. “Have me and call me yours.”

Your bold request surprised both of you. Jungkook wasn’t expecting you to say such a thing, let alone that you would indirectly confess that you wanted him in the same way he did you.

“What’d you say?”

“If you’re willing to have me, I want to be yours.” The anticipation was killing you, making all your senses be on the lookout for any sign of discomfort on Jungkook’s face. “I like you, Kook, and I mean it with my whole heart.”

Jeon couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He had already accepted the fact that you didn’t reciprocate his feelings. A one sided, unrequited love was all he got, but perhaps life finally decided to give me a breather and let him have the ounce of happiness that the boy desperately craved all along.

“You mean… you feel the same?” He asked carefully, waiting for your answer impatiently. “You lo—, no, you like me too?”

With a soft nod and a bright smile, you answered: “I do. I do like you, and I do love you, Jungkook.”

The words felt foreign coming from your mouth, as if you never imagined yourself proclaiming your love for the boy on countless nights. Reality, however, was way better than any hypothetical scenario where Jungkook would run to you to say it was mutual.

You could see the exact moment when your words finally made sense in his head, when he finally realized that this was not a dream and that you, in fact, felt the same for him.

“You better not be joking.” Jeon teased, still being a bit apprehensive that you might laugh at his face as part of some twisted prank to break his heart. “This is… not how I imagined this would go.”

“Me neither, but I can promise you that I’m being as serious and honest as I can be.”

“I believe you.”

And he really did; deep down Jungkook knew that even if life would want to turn on him and watch him suffer, you would never play a part in that. Your words felt sincere, despite the hesitation in your voice and your fidgeting fingers.

Jungkook was sure that he could lay his heart in your hands, and let you take it away to make it yours, and he would never have to worry of you hurting it.

“Now, does that mean we’re good, right?” He asked once again, with a bright grin on his face.

“Yes, we’re good now.” You giggled, sliding closer to him.

“So, can I kiss you now?”

You stopped in your tracks, with your wide-eyed gaze and tingling fingers, ready to feel his skin on yours.

It has been a long time since the last kiss you two shared, you would be lying if you said you weren’t needy for his kisses or his touch, and so, without a second thought you leaned in, stopping just a few inches from his face.

“Do it.”

Jungkook didn’t need more than that. Your words were enough to make him lose his composure and crash his lips against yours.

A warm sensation spread all around your body, filling you with ecstasy and the serotonin you much needed, also luring you to take more and more of him. Your hands started a slow trip up his torso to finally wrap around his neck and pull him closer than before.

Jungkook was holding you with such delicacy, as if he were scared that you would break. It felt like a lifetime since the last time he had you like this and the boy was afraid he would do something that could ruin the moment. Days and days Jeon spent replaying in his head those moments full of passion and need that you two loved to share; the times where he would have you in his arms, silently claiming you as his, while his lips traveled across your skin to paint your flesh with hues of red and purple. Back then, Jungkook could only hope that said marks would fade slowly, letting him enjoy the way your body had proof that the only man able to take all your inhibitions and make you reach the sky was no other than himself.

Now, feeling you like this, touching you like this, without the fear of someone seeing you and starting rumors, without the worry of hiding from your brother, and with the clear understanding that both of you feel the same for the other, Jungkook could finally enjoy the moment to the fullest. His warm hands engulfing you in his tender touch distracted you from his desperate lips running up and down your neck, and from his teeth sinking into your flesh.

A moan escaped from your mouth, parting your lips while a rush of heat conquered every inch of your skin. It was becoming difficult to keep the moment nice and romantic, without turning it into a hot mess of kisses and inappropriate touching.

“I love you, Y/n.” Jungkook whispered into your ear, before pulling slightly away to look right into your eyes. “I really do.”

His soft gaze ignited a bubbling feeling at the pit of your stomach, making you want to stay like this forever, just staring at each other with tender smiles. But a part of you knew it wouldn’t be enough, you wanted more, craved more, so it was no surprise when you pushed Jungkook to rest on the back of the couch while you moved to straddle him.

“Show me.” You asked. “Show me how much you love me.”

A sly smirk took place on Jungkook’s face, while his hands acted automatically to be placed on your hips and hold you down on his lap.

“I’m not sure you can handle it.” He teased. “That you can handle me.”

The tattooed man was looking for a challenge, to start a play of who can handle more before they get so desperate that clothes start to fly out all around the house.

“Try me, then.” You argued back. “I promise you, you’ll be surprised to find out how much of you I can handle.”

A scoff passed his lips while his hands tightened the grip on your hips.

“You sure you want this night to go like this? Don’t you prefer we take this slower?” Even if there was a light mocking tone attached to his voice, concern and worry were also adorning it.

Jungkook was still scared that tonight might be just a dream and that once he closes his eyes you would slip through his fingers to never be found again. He didn’t want to make or say the wrong thing, and it worried him that falling into old habits would do the damage he was trying to avoid.

“Do you want to take things slower?”

It was a possibility you never considered, but coming to think of it, maybe it was better to take it easy before rushing to do things you might not be ready to do just yet.

It was a fresh start after all, but maybe that didn’t implied fucking on the same night you two finally confessed your feelings for the other.

“I want you, but I don’t want to ruin this chance we have now.” His answer warmed your heart, making you smile at him. “I don’t want to make old mistakes and make you think I’m only using you for your body.”

“I know you’re not, at least now I do.” You assured him. “I want you, Jungkook, and I want this with you, but if you’re not ready that’s completely fine, we don’t have to do anything.”

He shook his head, wrapping both of his arms around your waist to hold you close to him.

“I just wanted to make sure you were okay with this.” A kiss was softly placed on your lips, before Jungkook suddenly stood up with you in his arms, carrying you to his bedroom. “But if we’re gonna do this, let’s do it somewhere comfortable.”

“The couch was comfortable enough.” You giggled, holding onto him to make sure you didn't fall.

“Maybe, but my girl deserves better than that.”

The last time you were in his room was when Jungkook decided it was a good idea to stay in, instead of going out with your friends. He managed to convince you to stay with him, as he promised you a night full of food, drinks and his head buried in between your thighs.

Back then you didn’t care to observe the little details that made Jungkook’s room so him.

His walls were painted with a somber hue of blue, adorned with pictures of him and the rest of his friend group or his family. Your brother appeared in most of the photos, as Jungkook cherished every single moment they have spent together. There was even a picture of him and his dog, Bam, which was currently at his parents house, framed on the nightstand. The rest of the room was as any guy’s room would be; clothes scattered across the floor, that you would often steal from him whenever you were at his place; messy desk with cans of beer and energy drinks, as well as his computer and a pair of headphones; two vapes were also left on the desk, next to a pair of rings and a watch.

The bed was adorned with a single pillow and white sheets. He didn’t need much as he lived alone, but anytime you were over Jungkook would try to accommodate his house to make you feel comfortable.

“Sorry for the lack of pillows.” He apologized when he put you down on the soft mattress. “I didn’t know you were coming over, or I would’ve gotten the one you like so much.”

“It’s not like we’re gonna use it right now, so we’re good.” You chuckled tugging his shirt to bring him down to you. “Now, please do something, I’ve been waiting for way too long to have you like this again.”

“So impatient.” He smirked, running his hands up and down your sides. “Let me take my time with you, like you said, it’s been too long.”

Jungkook started a trail of kisses down your neck, while his hands pushed up the fabric of your shirt to knead your hot skin.

“We need to take this off.” He didn’t waste a moment to take your shirt off, admiring your upper body with hungry eyes. “Fuck, I missed seeing you like this, baby.”

Jeon didn’t give you time to reply before his mouth attacked your lips once again. There was desperation and neediness coursing through both of your bodies and it was palpable how bad you wanted one another, which in result made the two of you act clumsy while getting undressed.

Jungkook struggled to take off your bra and pants but he finally did, leaving you only in your underwear. His hands ran up to fondle your tits, feeling them and tugging at your nipples while his lips were rapidly traveling down to the place where you needed him the most.

“So fucking perfect, you have no idea how much I wanted to have you like this.” He confessed, placing wet kisses all around your inner thighs.

“Jungkook…” You called for him in a breathy voice, while squirming in your place.

The sensations he was sending right to your core were making it impossible for you to stay put.

“Please…” You begged.

“Please, what?” He asked. “What do you want, beautiful?”

It was hard for you to talk, especially with his mouth so dangerously close to your soaked cunt, but you managed.

“Please touch me.” You moaned out, hands traveling down to pull his hair and get him closer to your core.

“Is this not enough?” Jungkook inquired, playfully. He didn’t relent, getting out of your grasp to do as he pleased. “Do you need more, baby?”

A nod was all he got, but that wouldn’t cut it, not for Jungkook.

“Use your words.” A harsh smack was delivered to one of your thighs, making it jiggle. “Come on, be good and tell me what you want.”

Groaning you rested your weight on your shoulders to look down at him with desperate eyes.

“Please touch me here.” Your hand moved rapidly to caress your center through your wet underwear. “I need you so bad.”

“That’s all you had to say, sweetheart.” Jungkook didn’t waste a second longer on teasing you, instead he made sure to take off your dripping panties, putting them to the side and forcing your legs to stay wide open. “Look at that, so pretty and wet for me, huh?” He ran his fingers through your folds, smearing your juices all over. “This is just for me, right baby?”

You nodded vehemently, chasing after his touch.

“Yes, only you can get me like this.”

The tattooed guy dipped down, placing a dangerous kiss right under your navel, so close yet so far away from where you needed him the most. A fire was ignited in between your legs, and Jungkook was the perfect remedy for that. His lips traveled down slowly, coming face to face with your dripping cunt. He took his sweet time licking up and down your folds, his wet tongue felt wonderful against your burning flesh, making you elicit the sweetest of sounds just for him.

“Fuck, that feels so good.” Moan after moan, your composure and sanity were slowly disappearing, leaving you with an ardent need to grind against his tongue. “Faster, please…”

Your boy couldn’t deny any of your wishes, and so his pace quickened in a matter of seconds, running his tongue up and down as fast as he could, only momentarily stopping at your clit to suck on it before continuing with his ministrations. Jungkook was avidly eating you out, enjoying the taste of your juices on his hot tongue and the feeling of your entrance clenching on it whenever he let it slip in. It was like heaven on earth, like a much needed meal he waited for so long. And just like a starved man, Jeon did his best to devour you until there was nothing else from you that he could take.

“Don’t stop, I’m so fucking close!” You could feel his fingers opening your folds to make their way inside your cunt, pumping in and out at a slow pace. “Oh my god!”

Your hands were still pulling at his hair, desperately trying to get a good hold on him to bring him closer and closer to you.

“You taste so freaking good, baby.” Jungkook pulled away to inhale some air before diving in again and smothering his face with your soaking folds. “Fuck, best pussy I’ve ever had.”

His nasty words were making your eyes flutter shut, with a stream of curses falling off your lips. It was ridiculous how good he could make you feel with his mouth and his fingers, you always wondered how he knew exactly what to do to make you see the stars. Jungkook was so good at reading your body, even better than you ever could; his touch was delicious, charged with the right amount of passion to throw you over the edge.

“You getting close, doll? Wanna come on my tongue, hm?”

“Yes, please! I’m so close.” You begged, breathlessly. “I just— fuck, need it… need to cum, please.”

A chuckle vibrated against your cunt, making you shiver. His fingers slipped out of your hole, leaving you empty and needy.

“Go on, pretty, cum for me.”

It was almost automatic; the moment those words left Jungkook’s mouth, the waves of your pending orgasm finally crashed over your body, making your legs shake and leaving your skin coated in goosebumps. Eyes fully shut and mouth widely open, not caring about the obscene sounds coming out of it like a chant. Jeon’s name was repeated over and over like a broken record, just like a fervent believer would pray away their sins, so vehemently, so desperately. His name was attached to your brain, making it the only coherent word leaving your lips.

“There you go, that’s my good girl.” He caressed your sides softly. “You look so beautiful when you cum.”

His praise made your head feel fuzzy and the fire between your legs was fueled once again, ready for another round.

Slowly you opened your eyes, blinking away the tiredness and trying to focus on the boy in front of you. His face became clearer and clearer, providing you with one of his breath-taking smiles.

“You good there?” Jungkook asked, sweetly, while a tender kiss was placed on your lips. “D’you wanna take a moment?”

You shook your head, still recovering your ability to speak properly.

“I wanna…” A whisper ran through his ears, prompting him to lean closer. “Want to…”

“What do you want, my love?”

My love.

Jungkook has never called you that before, and if you were to be true, it felt fucking amazing to hear him say it.

“You, I want you.” It was your final answer, looking right up at him with a fierce glare.

Your hands reached out to palm him through his boxers, feeling his hard erection twitch under your touch. The dark-haired boy hissed at the sensation of your fingers wrapping around his cock, while giving it a light squeeze.

“You don’t— shit, you don’t have to.” Jeon reassured you. “Let me… take care of you.”

“But I want to.” You argued back, slipping your hand inside his underwear. He felt heavy and warm, and so painfully hard that it made you feel bad that he had to stay confined in the small space of his boxers while he ate you out. “Let me taste you, baby.”

You were craving his cock ever since you stepped into his room; the mental image of his dick pumping in and out of your mouth left you salivating, almost whimpering at the thought.

“Please, I wanna make you feel good too.”

Jungkook closed his eyes for a brief moment, pondering if he should let you have your way or if it was better to turn you around and fuck you into oblivion. He reasoned, at the end, that he could do both. Jeon would let you have your fun for a moment, and afterwards he would completely destroy you with his cock.

“How can I say no to such a pretty baby?” He grinned at you, getting in a more comfortable position while taking his underwear off. “It’s all yours, sweetheart.”

Scrambling quickly to rest on your hands and knees, you took his cock into one of your palms, slowly stroking him and smearing the drop of saliva you spat onto his dick, to make it easier for you to move your hand.

It was such an amazing sensation, your small hand struggling to wrap around his thick cock, fighting your own urge to pump him dry until he was whimpering and begging. Maybe another time you’ll be able to see that side of him, but tonight you were determined to make him cum in your mouth, and so deciding you wouldn’t waste a second longer, you took his red head in between your lips, rocking your head slowly to take more and more of his length. Little by little you were able to fit almost all of him inside your throat, choking a little bit when his tip reached a bit too far.

“Fuck, that feels amazing, baby. Keep going.” He moaned, looking down at you and the way his dick disappeared inside your mouth with ease. “Just like that, don’t you dare stop.”

Your pace increased, ripping moans and groans out of the boy. Your heart swelled with pride for making him sound and act like that; it took you way too long to be in such a position once again that you were fearing you didn’t have the same effect on him anymore.

“Faster, doll, I know you can go faster.” His hand weaved through your hair to get a hold on your head and guide your movements. “That’s right, fuck, your mouth was made only for my cock.”

It truly was, his dick fit almost perfectly and without further complications. The way you were so eager to take him in, without flinching or gagging was truly amazing for the man in front of you. Jungkook was mesmerized by your ability to suck him off until he didn’t have much to give.

“Shit, stay still for a moment.” He ordered, placing both hands at each side of your head. You did as told, waiting for his next move. “There you go, I want to fuck this pretty mouth of yours.”

His hips swayed beautifully, thrusting in and out of your throat. His cock was reaching places like never before and brought tears to your eyes due to the effort of keeping your jaw relaxed and opened for him.

“That’s it, such a good little slut, letting me use you, huh?” He teased, smirking right at you. “You like it when I use you like this, don’t ya?”

It was as clear as day that you did, no need for an answer, yet you tried to nod, which only caused to boost his ego due to how much you struggled to move.

“Mhm, I know you do, baby.” His pace increased and so did his moans; it was difficult for the tall guy to be quiet, especially with the delicious feeling of your mouth on his cock.

All of a sudden he pulled away, letting you recover your breath and positioning you to lay back down again.

“As much as I’d love to keep fucking your mouth, I’d rather stuff this pretty pussy with my cum.” Jungkook leaned down to suck on your neck, making sure to leave a mark on a very obvious spot, where everyone would be able to see it.

Feeling like you belonged to someone, like you were a nice piece of jewelry owned by a man like Jungkook, it should have caused you a very different feeling from the one you were experiencing. Your eyes shouldn’t be searching for him, impatiently, to see that look of determination in his orbs that would tell you that you belonged to him and him alone. Your hands shouldn’t reach out to touch his back, sinking your nails into his flesh just like his teeth did in your skin; a weak attempt to reciprocate the feeling, to make it clear who was the only girl who would make the great Jeon Jungkook so desperate and needy. But they did, and you enjoyed it; you loved the hiss coming from his mouth and the shiver coursing his body. You adored the way his eyes softened for a brief second, while looking right into yours and straight into your heart.

It was like a stroke to your ego, knowing it was you who he craved, who he needed. It was you, and it would continue to be you for a long time.

Jungkook finally pulled away from your neck, standing tall in front of you and guiding himself to slide up and down your folds, coating his cock with your juices. His tip was nudging at your clit every time he went up, making you gasp and shudder.

It was a torture, feeling him so close yet so far from your entrance, the worst part was that he enjoyed getting you like this; Jungkook loved toying with you. And it was so unfair how much the boy could make you crave his touch, but not give it to you.

“Just put it in, for fucks sake.” A frustrated groan abandoned your lips.

You couldn’t handle the teasing anymore. However, you didn’t think about the consequences of your words and how bad it would end for you for demanding such a thing.

Jungkook stopped all of his movements, slowly drifting his gaze up, to look right into your eyes. His gaze darkened, making you recoil in your place, while your legs started to close in anticipation of his next move.

Jeon moved to get close to your ear and whisper, “I’m gonna let it slide just because I’m as eager as you to fuck you dumb, but be careful with what you say, princess.” Slowly, he pulled away, to then harshly open your legs and slap your clit with his cock. “Turn around.” He ordered.

It took you a few seconds to register his words in your brain, but finally you did as told, albeit reluctantly, because you wanted to see and feel him from up close while he fucked you into oblivion.

“Don’t turn your face.” He caught you trying to look over your shoulder, guiding your head to look right into the pillow.

“But I wanna see you.” You whined, not fighting him anymore.

“Shoulda thought about it, before acting like a brat.” A slap was delivered to your ass cheek, making you flinch and whimper. “And be grateful I’m being nice enough to fuck you, despiste your nasty attitude.”

Jungkook positioned himself with your entrance, anticipating the tight grip of your warm walls.

“I’m sorry.” You apologized quietly, in an attempt to make him relent and change positions.

“Too late for that, baby.” He chuckled while thrusting all the way into your tight cunt, not giving you time to argue any longer. “Fuck, this is heaven.” His head lolled back, placing both of his hands at each side of your hips to guide your movements.

“Oh my fucking god!” You exclaimed, feeling his veiny cock reach every crook of your insides.

Moans and whimpers were falling from your lips uncontrollably, due to how good Jungkook’s dick felt. He hasn’t moved yet since he thrusted in, but the sensation alone of being filled to the brim with his length was enough to make you see stars.

“Mo-Move.” You stuttered, trying to bounce back and create the much needed friction. “Please, move!”

Jungkook could only smirk, enjoying how vulnerable you were at the moment, completely at his mercy. He controlled your body and pleasure perfectly, knowing the spots and touches that would get you shuddering in pure bliss.

“Now you remember your manners, doll?” He grunted, slowly retrieving from inside your pussy, all the way out until your walls could only wrap around the tip. “How convenient.”

You wanted to argue and clap back, but it was impossible to form a coherent thought while being tortured like that. Jungkook didn’t care that he was also stopping himself from feeling the ridiculously amazing sensation of fucking into you, as long as he could teach you a lesson and make you regret your words and actions.

“Please, please, please.” You cried out, trying to move, but giving up after the tall man stopped you with a harsh smack. “Jungkook…”

The way you said his name made the guy feel some type of way, but still not enough to give you exactly what you wanted.

“You gotta ask me nicely, princess, and I might give it to you.”

He wanted you to ask nicely and ask nicely is what you did; gathering enough strength to softly utter the words, you tried to clear your throat to finally speak.

“Please, Kook, can you fuck me so good until I forget my name?” Such a sweet tone for such a lewd request. “I need you to fill me up with your cock, please.”

The tattooed guy leaned down, wrapping one of his strong arms around your neck while dipping down to whisper in your ear.

“Mmm, you sound so fucking pretty when you beg for me like that.” His gentle lips kissed up and down your jaw. “You did good, baby. I think you finally deserve it.”

Without previous warning, Jungkook thrusted all the way in again, filling you up to the brim, however, this time he didn’t torture you with a slow pace or any sort of teasing. Jeon didn’t waste a second longer and commenced to rapidly pound into you, until you could only whine and whimper.

His arm wrapped around your neck was slightly obstaculazing your breathing, but you wouldn’t have it any other way. It felt immensely good to be fucked nice and hard while every single inch of Jungkook’s body was engulfing you.

“Fuck, you feel amazing, baby.” He moaned. “Clenching on my cock, so good.”

His free hand traveled down in between your legs to rub your clit, making you so sensitive and causing even more moans to fall from your lips.

“Sh-shit, oh god!” You exclaimed with a trembling voice. “So big… so deep.”

A chuckle rumbled from Jungkook’s chest. He has always loved how dirty you would get for him, speaking nonsense about his size and how good he fucks you. It was truly an ego boost.

“Yeah? You like how deep I go, baby?” He panted, due to all the effort he was putting into destroying you with his cock. “You love when I fuck you like this, don’t you?”

You could only nod, it was hard to form a coherent sentence at the moment.

“Look at you,” he laughed. “You can’t even talk.”

You couldn’t protest, couldn’t even move. The only thing you could do was relax and allow your body to enjoy the way Jungkook was so avidly thrusting into you. Your arms and legs were starting to give up, feeling too tired to keep your body up; you just wanted to lay down.

Jungkook could feel your exhaustion, and so he quickly unwrapped his arm from your neck, to then turn you around and get you in a comfortable position, all of this while still fucking you senseless.

“There you go, better?” He asked, genuinely concerned about your wellbeing.

“Mhm.” You hummed, closing your eyes while your hands fisted the sheets. “Don’t stop…”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”

Jungkook felt like dying with the way your walks were clenching on him. Your pussy felt heavenly, so warm and so tight only for his cock. He knew he had already ruined you for any other man you could possibly meet in your life —not like he’s gonna let that happen, anyway—, and he loved that fact. The dark-haired boy enjoyed how you would only crave him, need him, beg just for him. This side of you, no one knew, he was sure that not even your past boyfriends got to see you like this. So free, so dirty, so beautiful and tempting. It was only him, and Jungkook could only wish it continued to be like that for a long time.

Amidst Jungkook’s wandering thoughts, he didn’t realize you had opened your eyes once again, looking right into his own, with such a fierce stare. Your hands started a slow trip from his thighs up to his chest, caressing his honeyed skin which was glistening with sweat; shining just right under the moonlight. Your nails softly scratched his flesh, making the boy tremble under your touch and lean into your hands to feel more of you. It was getting to that point where he no longer held power or willingness to be dominant. Jeon was starting to lose himself in you, in the way your cunt was wrapped around his cock, in the way his length would poke your stomach because of how deep he was; in the way your mouth was softly calling for him, accompanied by obscene noises that he only loved hearing if the came from you.

“You look so fucking pretty, Y/n.” The lack of a pet name sent a warm hug to your heart. You knew he was being serious; no teasing, no mocking. Jungkook was speaking from his heart, completely enamored with the view of you; panting underneath him while your body welcomed his embrace so perfectly. “I could never get tired of looking at you, my pretty baby.”

There were not enough words in the English language that could help you express how grateful you were for having a man like Jungkook in your life. But perhaps there was no need, since you knew that showing it was always more effective than saying it.

Your hands wrapped around his neck, pulling him down to mesh his lips with yours. His swollen lips moved slowly and gently, a stark contrast to the way he was fucking you. His cock was wildly ramming into you, while his lips were softly caressing yours. His tongue quickly made its way inside your mouth, starting a fight with your own to assert dominance, nonetheless, it was futile, that fight was already won by him and you could only back down and enjoy his touch.

“I’m so close.” You moaned, wrapping both of your legs around his waist to make him go even deeper. “I need to— fuck, I need to cum.”

Jungkook shook his head, heavily breathing while gathering his thoughts to talk properly. The feeling of it all was making him feel dizzy.

“Just… Just wait a bit longer.” He ordered you.

You groaned, fluttering your eyes shut while trying your best to hold it until he told you to let go. It became a torture once again. You knew you wouldn’t be able to wait for too long, especially with the change in pace and how deep his cock was reaching. His tip was nudging at that sweet spot of yours, making your whole body stutter and whine so perfectly that it made Jungkook grunt into your neck.

“I’m almost there.” He announced, manically pounding into you. “Just a bit more, princess.”

“I don’t… I don’t think I can wait… anymore.” You cried out, fisting his hair while your hips were desperately moving on their own volition, searching for some sweet release. “I’m gonna cum.”

It was not a warning anymore, it was a fact. Your orgasm was rapidly approaching, making your body tremble with the waves of your awaited release. Rather than holding yourself back, you finally let go, enjoying the sensations and pleasure your orgasm brought with itself.

Jungkook hissed at the way your pussy clenched on his dick, making it almost impossible for him to keep moving.

“Oh, fuck.” He cursed, looking down at where your bodies were joined, feeling a bit lightheaded from how good it felt. Your cum was coating his cock, making it shine so perfectly. “That’s my good girl, make a mess on my dick, come on.”

His encouraging words only made it even difficult for you to come down from your high, but the boy couldn’t care any less. Jungkook rejoiced in the feeling of pride for making you feel that way, to make you so vulnerable and weak that the intensity of your release would make you go dumb and turn you into a babbling mess. Not a single thought was behind those beautiful eyes of yours at that precise moment, and Jeon loved how lost you looked, reaching out in need of his comforting touch to ground yourself after such intense orgasm.

Your hands found his, intertwining your fingers to form a hard grip.

Jungkook kept fucking into you, desperately searching for his own release, not stopping for even a second to catch his breath. He needed to cum and needed it now.

“Can I cum inside you?” Jeon was so quick to ask when he felt his orgasm building up in the pit of his stomach. “Please… I wanna fill you up.”

It was such a different side of him. The whiny and needy side of him you loved so much. His begging got you weak in the knees and made your stomach flutter with adoration.

You nodded, gently caressing his face while kissing his lips once again.

“Look at me, please.” Jungkook begged so sweetly. “Keep your eyes on me, I need to see you.”

“Let go for me, baby.” You smiled up at him, staring right into his eyes, while noises full of passion echoed through the room.

His whiny moans rang in your ears, making you feel fuzzy inside.

“Fuck, so good.” He moaned, resting his forehead on yours, his eyes never looking away. “I love you, Y/n. I love you so fucking much.”

“I love you too, Kook.” You said, breathlessly, feeling his warm cum filling your already sore pussy. “Just like that, so good.”

Jungkook kept rocking into you until his legs couldn’t hold him up and he ended up crashing into you. His strong arms slowly wrapped themselves around your frame, keeping you close and safe. He hid his face in the crook of your neck, with his hot breath hitting against your skin. A stream of incoherent curses were coming out his mouth, making you giggle. Neither of you dared to speak for at least five minutes, silently deciding to enjoy each other while recovering from each of your intense orgasms.

It truly felt like heaven on earth, whether it was because of how long you two have been apart, or because of Jungkook’s amazing skills; whatever it was you felt amazing and finally complete. The missing piece of the puzzle was finally here, making your life ten times better and brighter.

Jungkook was the first one to break the silence, with his babbling and groaning.

“What was that?” You asked him to repeat himself.

“I said…” He sighed, pulling away from your neck. “I’m fucking spent.”

“Me too.” You giggled. “But it was worth it.”

“Damn right it was.”

Jungkook finally pulled out, watching his cum slowly flow out from your cunt. Two of his fingers gathered the liquid coming out of you and pushed it back inside, making you gasp in surprise.

“We can’t afford to waste any drop now, can we?” He smirked at you while his fingers danced slowly inside you. “You always feel so warm, baby, no wonder why I love your pussy so much.”

After a few seconds, Jungkook retrieved his fingers from inside of you and wrapped his pink lips around them, liking every drop of both of your cums.

“So sweet.”

A part of you wanted to push him to lay down and ride him until your legs couldn’t keep you still, but you were so tired and exhausted that even the idea of putting any effort into making Jungkook lay down made you groan.

“Come here, baby.” Jeon wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you into his side, making your head rest on his firm chest. “Let’s rest for a bit before I fuck you again.”

You hit him softly in his stomach, causing both of you to giggle.

“Just how much stamina you think I have?” You asked.

“Not so much, to be honest.” He joked. “But it’s bold of you to assume I would make you work for it a second time. I’m not that mean, baby.”

“Yeah, that’s what you want me to think.”

You looked up at him, only to realize Jungkook was already staring at you. His doe eyes were looking right into your own, making their easy way into your heart. Jungkook had a way to always make you feel special whenever he looked at you. He did it back when you two were nothing more than a quick fuck, and he did it now when your souls were finally intertwined.

“I meant it.” He started saying. “I really love you, Y/n.”

“I know, Kook.” You assured him. “And I love you too, just as much.”

A soft kiss was delivered to your forehead. “I just wanted to make it clear. I spent too much time hiding my real feelings that I’m scared you’ll get the wrong idea and feel like I’m not being honest enough.”

Your hand flew right up to rest on his cheek, caressing his cheekbone tenderly.

“I understand the sentiment, but there’s no need to hide from each other anymore. I can feel your love now, Jungkook, and it’s one of the most amazing sensations I’ve ever had.”

Your words helped the boy to feel at ease. Jungkook was on high alert for any discomfort he might cause you unwillingly; he feared you would simply leave his side if he such as said that your hands were starting to get cold. That kind of feeling was something you didn’t want the boy to experience and you were more than happy to reassure him over and over again that what he felt was not only reciprocated but it was also enough for the both of you.

“Let’s sleep a little bit, I’m too tired to even talk.” You snuggled into his side, hiding your face in the crook of his face while your arms wrapped around his torso.

Jungkook smiled fondly, looking down at your already sleepy figure.

“Rest well, princess.”

Taglist 🏷️

@aphrwodite, @r1r111, @cholychi, @artificialsuicid, @tatamicc

[dangraccoon]

Oyuba’din - Chapter 13: Hostage

Summary: The Bad Batch executes a plan while on shore leave.

Warnings: drunkenness, bad decision time™, attempted “kidnapping” jk lmao but like sorta if you squint real hard and tilt your head a little

Author’s Note: drunk Hunter is the most ridiculous character I’ve ever written and I love him so much.

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“Jaine, you have to tell me who this fine specimen of a man is!” Sinya gushed, brushing a lek from her shoulder.

“Sinya!” Jaine hissed.

Argus put a hand up. “I’m right here,” she grumbled.

“Jainey, who’re them?” Hunter slurred, his brow furrowed. “They dun look like good comp’ny.”

“They’re my friends,” Jaine said through gritted teeth. I’m not drunk enough for this, she thought as she grabbed Hunter's arm and led him away from the table.

“Hey, no need to be s’pushy,” he protested.

“Hunter, I’m going to ask you this one time and one time only,” she steamed. “What the hell is wrong with you? You interrupt my night out with my friends who you immediately insulted, you’re absolutely wasted-”

Hunter shushed her, wrapping his arms around her shoulders in a tight hug. “‘Ts okay, Jainey. Wer gonna get ya back to the barracks when m’brothers find me.”

“Hunter,” she growled. “Let go of me!”

She struggled against him, but it was no use as he lifted her up over his shoulder, her dress riding up uncomfortably.

“‘Mon, Jainey. Back to th’ barracks.”

“Hunter, I swear to the gods above and below if you don’t put me down right this instant!” she shouted, slamming her hands against his back.

“Oh, maker,” Echo groaned as Hunter approached him with a fuming medic over his shoulder.

“‘Mon, Ech, wer goin’ home,” he smiled, ignoring the squirming Jaine on his shoulder.

“Kriff, are you okay, Jainey?” Echo asked.

“Echo, get me down from here!”

Echo tried, but Hunter was stronger than him. He fought against the poor woman being removed from his back, ultimately shaking Echo off entirely, and sprinting out of the back door into a small alley.

“Hunter, I’m going to fucking kill you!” she raged.

The door came crashing open, the rest of the Bad Batch came pouring out, taking in the sight before them.

“Bad Batch,” Tech whispered loudly to them. “R&R Plan 7A; the Hostage.”

The rest of the Batch nodded, moving quickly, Crosshair walking over to simply talk to Hunter about anything other than Jaine, while Echo and Wrecker worked on extracting her from his arms. Tech, well, he’d make sure Jaine was alright after, and likely help Crosshair restrain Hunter, but for now, and since Hunter had approached Jaine’s table, he was recording.

“Hunter, remember how you used to tell us the legend you heard about the aiwhas? How’d that go again?” Crosshair asked.

Hunter’s eyes sparkled as he began to tell Crosshair for probably the two hundredth time in their lives about the aiwhas on Kamino.

As he spoke, he used his hands to mimic the motion of the creatures, and so his tight grip on Jaine began to loosen.

Echo and Wrecker nodded at each other, a silent countdown until they’d yank Jaine away from Hunter.

“Hang on, Jainey,” Wrecker whispered. “Might get a little bumpy.”

A moment later Echo grabbed onto Hunter and Wrecker pulled Jaine away, and Crosshair immediately twisted Hunter’s arm behind his back.

“Easy, brother,” Crosshair soothed. “I think it’s time we got you to bed.”

Wrecker placed Jaine back on the ground and she smoothed her dress out, yanking it back down as far as it would go.

“Are you alright?” Tech asked nervously, appearing at her side.

Jaine didn’t reply. She was seething.

“Hunter, don’t you have something you think you should say to Jaine?” Echo prodded as Crosshair faced the sergeant in her direction.

Jaine’s glare at the concrete didn’t rise to meet his pouty-looking face.

“‘M sorry, Jainey,” he whined, but it was obvious that he was beginning to lose consciousness, starting to slump forward in Crosshair’s grip.

“We’ll get a taxi,” Tech sighed, giving a quick nod to Jaine, and pulling the rest of his brothers with him.

Echo, however, remained still. His eyes were on her, despite the fact that she was glaring holes into the pavement in front of her.

“Jaine?” he asked, cautiously. “Are you okay?”

Jaine could feel the moment her anger broke.

“Am I okay? Are you serious, Echo?” she seethed.

“I’m sorry. When he drinks it’s hard to predict how drunk he’ll actually get. One minute he’s fine, the next-”

“He’s kidnapping women who are already pissed at him and dragging them away against their will?” she snapped. “I mean really, I leave you all alone for one night and you’re out getting drunk and going banthashit insane? What if I wasn’t there, huh?”

“I know.”

“What if he’d picked up someone else and began to carry them away?”

“I know.”

“Kriffing hells, Echo. He could be decommissioned for that! All of you could!”

“I know, Jaine!” Echo burst. “I know, but like I said he changes from minute to minute and I know that it’s not an excuse, but we’re all at least a little buzzed and not on top of our game. I was supposed to be babysitting him, but I let him get away from me, okay? So, if you’re going to be mad at anyone now, be mad at me, because I don’t think Hunter can take anymore of it!”

Jaine stood in a stunned silence. It took a lot to make Echo snap like that, but Hunter can’t take more of her anger? Cool, calm, collected Hunter?

“Echo,” she mumbled. “What are you talking about?”

“He blames himself for you leaving-”

“Maybe he should,” Jaine bristled.

“He knows he hurt you and he feels terrible,” Echo explained, leaving out how Hunter was literally crying, for his sake.

Jaine took a deep breath. “Echo, I know he’s your brother and you’re just trying to help, but if Hunter is the one that’s sorry, Hunter is the one who should apologize.”

“I know, but I’m sorry, too,” Echo mumbled sadly.

“What?”

“It’s just - well, everything happened after that nightmare and I guess I feel like maybe all of it’s my fault.”

Jaine’s irritation started to cool, her eyes watching the ARC trooper carefully.

“If I didn’t have that nightmare, if I didn’t make you stay with me, Hunter wouldn’t have gotten upset and you wouldn’t be leaving.”

“Echo-”

“Echo, ya comin’?” Wrecker bellowed, rounding the corner. He noticed Jaine was still there and smiled. “Need a ride, Jainey?”

“Thanks, Wrecker,” she smiled, jumping in before Echo could continue. “But I’m going to head back in with my friends. Have a good night, Wreck.”

As she turned to leave, she placed a hand on the right side of Echo’s chest. “Goodnight, Echo.”

He watched her walk back into the bar, frozen to the spot. He could almost feel the warmth of her palm against his chest, and felt the heat of it run straight to his cheeks. The placement of her hand just then reminded him of his old ARC armor. Thoughts of his captain, and ultimately his twin, flooded his brain, the three of them swirling around in a hurricane of affection.

“Echo?” Wrecker called again, breaking him from his own head.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming.”

-

“Jaine! There you are!” Sinya shouted across the club, clearly leaving poor Argus hanging for a kiss. “Hey, where’d your boyfriend go?”

“Again, not my boyfriend, Sinya,” she said, rolling her eyes as she plopped down into the booth.

“Oh, why not? He’s so hot,” Sinya whined.

“Still here,” Argus groaned, feigning offense.

“Oh, it’s okay, honey, you have very similar faces,” Sinya giggled with a wink, earning more eye rolls. “Anyway, Jaine, you have to grab that man up, before someone else does.”

“Gods, Sinya,” Jaine growled. “For the last time, I’m not grabbing anyone up! They were my squad and I can’t be interested in any of them.”

Sinya looked at her, her eyes a little hurt by the tone, but nodded, becoming uncharacteristically quiet. Argus scowled at her.

“I’m sorry,” she sighed. “I shouldn’t have snapped at you like that.”

Sinya smiled a little and shrugged. “I shouldn’t have pushed your buttons like that.”

The women looked at each other for a moment before wrapping each other in a tight hug.

“Aww, you know I can’t stay mad at you,” Sinya smiled.

“I will never understand your relationship,” Argus laughed, shaking his head.

-

When Hunter woke up, he was amazed at just how shitty he felt. Of course, he had gotten drunk before, he’d even been plastered a few times, but this morning-after felt worse.

“Oh, good, you’re still alive,” a monotone voice said with an obvious edge of irritation mixed in it. Hunter almost didn’t recognize the voice, it was so icy.

He started to open his eyes, the harsh lights of their barracks on Coruscant hitting his overly sensitive eyes. “Jaine?” he asked.

“You’re a fucking idiot.”

Thanks for reading! - Dang

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[aajjks]

https://www.primetimer.com/features/netflix-you-joe-goldberg-cage-kevin-phipps

scream baby!JK

‘what is going on? where am i?’

you’re panicking.

you find yourself in a box, with a bed, and a shelf stacked with foods and snacks. you get up and when you see the door, you immediately run up and yank on the handle.

you pull again and again and again and when you’ve finally figured out it’s futile to tug on the locked door, you scream.

“HELP!!! SOMEBODY PLEASEEEEE!!!! GET ME OUT OF HERE!!!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!”

you bang on the “glass” even throw the bucket next to you as hard as you could to break it but nothing happened. not a scratch or a crack.

that’s when you figured this box you’re locked in isn’t glass.

you’re panicking again.

thiscan’tbehappening.thiscan’tbereal.i’mjustdreaming.i’mbackhome.i’mgonnawakeupsoon.there’sgottabeawayoutofhere.

there’s gotta be a way out of here.

you’re frustratingly pulling on your head of hair and thinking of ways to get out of this situation you got yourself in.

all you did was catch your ‘friend’ in a lie. a lie that dragged on for years yet you knew deep down that something was up. the missing knife, your past boyfriend, and your ‘could have’ or ‘would have’ been partners missing and killed.

for years he stood by your side and played as the best friend. smiled in your face and wiped your tears away when you were at your lowest and acted as if this “killer” wasn’t as big of a deal because he’d protect you.

he always said that.

but now here you are in some kind of box after confronting your so-called friend with the truth:

you know he is the killer.

after what felt like hours of your distress, he finally reveals himself.

your friend, the ghostface serial killer, jeon jungkook.

“LET ME OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW JUNGKOOK!!! DO YOU HEAR ME YOU CRAZY BASTARD?? GET ME OUT!!!!”

“th-this is crazy..y-you YOU are crazy!! how could you do this?? HOW COULD YOU!! you were my friend. what’s next, huh? you gonna kill me next?“

~🫧 (i got bored lol)

see now, he didn’t want to do this to you.

But you just had to be a smart little detective, and figure out everything, do you know how much effort it took for him to kill your boyfriend, he hates him so much.

And his plan even worked you had almost believed that your now dead boyfriend was the ghost face killer- that is until he hugged you and you saw the knife. So before you could react., jungkook knows you very well, and he knows your body really well.

Your body language is so predictable.

You had figured out it was him the moment he hugged you- so as he didn’t feel your Hands embrace him back, he knew that everything was over, but he couldn’t lose you.

So he had no choice but to hit you on your head, and now 17 hours later, he’s right in front of you.

You’re stuck in this cage that he built and he honestly wish that you didn’t end up being in it but… you just had to find out.

Sometimes you are way too smart,, for your own good and.. that can be troublesome for him. “Yn.. ouch.” Jungkook feigns being hurt when you call him a crazy bastard.

It doesn’t hurt.

“Baby… why did you have to find out? I didn’t want to do this to you, but you left me with no choice. I am so glad that that bastard is now dead. All you had to do was believe that he was the ghost face killer and everything would’ve been fine.” Jungkook smirks, taking off his khaki cap, “you brought this upon yourself.”

You’ve been best friends for so many years and… How can you even think that he would kill you when he has killed for you?

Now he’s a little hurt that he would think that he is going to kill you.. because all he wants to do is to love you, and to have you all to himself forever.

“I love you yn-so stop being a bitch. Don’t test my patience. I can be very nice you know that… but you’ve never seen me being so mean I hope you won’t so don’t provoke me.” Jungkook gets closer to the cage box, you’re banging on it, tears running down your face, and..

Honestly, he feels a little aroused.

You’re so pretty when you cry.

“Yn.. you’re such a pretty crier..”

[mitzisarchive]

Marauders as mitski songs

Hi! another one? yeah, but this time we’re here with my love regulus because i kin him and, honestly, i always want to talk about him

i’m a little wary about this one

once again i must remind y’all that this is my own interpretation. especially since i kin this boy and that affects the way i think of him (am i projecting? probably) but at the same time i must say i don’t want to romantice the death eaters nor justify bigotry. i could make an entire post of my personal interpretation of regulus

not gonna lie, at first i thought about giving regulus “goodbye my danish sweetheart” with the focus being, of course, his and sirius’ relationship. and it may be because i’m an only child, but i don’t really like how sometimes we reduce regulus’ character to sirius’ little brother, because he can be such an interesting character

anyways, i finally chose for him everyone, from lauren hell, a song which mitski defined as minimalistic - she actually made it when she didn’t had any instruments around!

let’s go with regulus “everyone” black

(did i lose the chance to do regulus “everyone” black // sirius “nobody” black parallel? yes, i will never recover)

___________________________________________________

Everyone, all of them

Everyone said, "Don't go that way"

So, of course, to that I said

"I think I'll go that way"

the song begins with this rebellion, the protagonists is going against everything their surroundings are telling them. there’s a certain cockiness to this decision, “so, of course, to that I said” is telling us the protagonist usually does whatever they want.

this may no sound like regulus at first, i know, but it’s because there’s been this weird babygirlfication of reggie, and i think y’all are forgetting this boy wanted to join the death eaters. i’m not the one to take jk rowling seriously, but she had something to say about regulus. apparently, he "got in a little too deep... He was attracted to it, but the reality of what it meant was way too much to handle"

now, we can argue about what was regulus attracted to, but as a slytherin i will assume regulus was attracted to the power voldemort possessed. now, “the reality of what it meant was way too much to handle” could be the fact that voldemort was actively making horrocruxes, but i would find it weird that someone could excuse a literal genocide but draw the line at immortality, so the reality of what it meant is probably more about the killing part.

now, you may be thinking “why would he join the death eaters if he couldn’t stand some death?” well, growing up with that kind of family probably desensitized him to some extend. we can’t forget that this boy died at 18, he was barely a child when he joined the death eaters and he didn’t become active until 17.

regulus definitely wasn’t defying everyone when he joined the death eaters, but i like seeing it this way:

regulus was getting into so much danger by joining the dark lord, there would be probably people around him who were worried about him, he may have ignored them.

but there was one who tried harder than anyone. his brother. i will fight whoever i have to fight, but i won’t believe that sirius let his little brother alone for a second while he could still look out for him. i won’t believe he didn’t beg for reg to come with him, and i won’t believe that even when he was disowned he didn’t ask for reg to not join the death eaters.

and, definitely, i won’t believe that regulus didn’t care about sirius. everyone may had told regulus to join the death eaters, but the one regulus cared the most was telling him not to join them.

so, of course, he joined them.

And I left the door open to the dark

I said, "Come in, come in, whatever you are"

But it didn't want me yet

he joins at 16, quite a young age, yet nothing happens yet, he’s not old enough after all

maybe he hanged around the future death eaters gang, and maybe he cursed some muggleborns, but he wasn’t active, all that once had screamed danger looked now stupid, after all, what had changed?

he’s still far way from the reality of the situation, the dark didn’t want him yet

Then like a babe in a crib

After some big hand turns out the light

And I opened my arms wide to the dark

I said, "Take it all, whatever you want"

a babe in a crib is such a painful metaphor

baby’s are supposed to be comfortable in a crib, happy,safe

when regulus had grown comfortable in that situation, he faced the reality, the violence, the death

his first reaction was probably to keep his posture and try to follow the others “take it, whatever you want” after all, regulus was active for a year, yet when he disappeared he had made enough of a reputation himself that people believed he was killed by voldemort. this boy was probably a menace.

I didn't know that I was young

I didn't know what it would take

I didn't know what it would take

this is the most painful part for me

“i didn’t know i was young”

sometimes we like to think we’re so mature and so old only to find out years later we were only kids. i think of sixteen-year-old me and i can’t help but smile at the fact that i believed i was practically an adult, because i was a teenager and so young.

my memories are sweeter than regulus’, for sure, as he had joined a terrorist group, and he had probably sacrificed so much of his integrity in order to fit in.

the fact that “i didn’t know what it would take” repeats twice makes me think that’s the breaking point of the protagonist, and regulus breaking point was voldemort hurting kreacher. for me, regulus probably had suspect about the horrocrux for a while until that confirms it

in that moment he makes the decision to end it all, and to redeem in his own twisted way

“Sometimes I think I am free”

the desire to redeem himself, the hope there’s something else for him, that he can do something better with his life

“Until I find I'm back in line again”

life isn’t a fairytale, regulus’ redemption stays between him and kreacher and his hopes evaporates as he’s drowned by inferis. he’s back in line, as he will be forever remembered as regulus black, the death eater.

or, well, kreacher doesn’t die there, and he lives long enough to clean regulus’ name

‘Fight! Fight! Fight for my master, defender of house-elves! Fight the Dark Lord, in the name of brave Regulus! Fight!’

________________________________________________

it’s interesting to say that before we’ve talked about the “After some big hand turns out the light” part, and it can be interpreted both as the reality of what joining the dark lord meant and being dragged by the inferis.

well HI AGAIN!!

i’ve been missing for a while, i know, but right now i’m about to face one of my country’s most difficult exams and i’m in the excellency program, so i have little to no time left

i love regulus so much and i need more morally grey regulus fics, drop some recs if you know any please

[survivor-trinidad-and-tobago]

Episode 15: "ACQUIESCE BABY!!!"—Kaleigh

In this round: Everyone acquiesces to Kaleigh's spelling superiority when she wins her second individual immunity; Kaleigh steals Zee's vote; and Zee joins the jury

Zee

Whaddup my name's Jared I'm 19 and I never fuckin learned how to read

Michael

Honestly not much to report! I'm going to try and stay strong with Alex and Kaleigh. Tony left but I'm sure that's a big relief for him, he did great for his first game.

Jack

Hey babes, so I’m SOOO HAPPY to be back and I’m with my hot gurlzzz and I love them. Im so happy Tony got out cause he didn’t vote w me (that’s what he gets 😌). At this point anyone but me, champ, or zee going home is the best for my game cause it’s gonna be a 3-3 tie. IM READY FOR ROCKS☠️😈

Kaleigh

woooooo another immunity win, i woulda been so shocked if someone could beat me at a spelling bee. ACQUIESCE BABY!!! my deranged cobwebby brain is good at one thing and one thing only… and that’s spelling. i’m jk i’m good at other things too but wow lol ok. so i’m immune tonight. zee is asking me and alex to flip on michael, and its just condescending at this point :( like i know what i’m doing babe and idgaf if u think michael is gonna win. i’m fine with that LMAO why would i flip on my allies to be at the bottom of ur 3? like? no??? but i told her it’s a possibility but i think i’ll probably just steal a vote tonight and get zee out. please god don’t let her have another stinking advantage !! also i finished that book and it was extremely good. and it’s my niece’s 4th birthday.

Alex

Ugh, this vote still feels tenuous. Champ said today she wanted to take Zee out last vote (not that it would have mattered, ultimately - I KNEW she had a second idol lol). She's flat out lied to me so many times at this point, but she also knows how big of a threat Zee is. Finding the time to actually talk game with her feels like it will be impossible, though. I finally reached out to Zee last night to compliment her on still trying to unify the tribe like with the game night. She used the words 'icing out' to describe how quiet chat has been between sides, which is fair. I don't know if it was directed only at me, but even if that wasn't what I was trying to do I can see how she felt that way. It just felt like there was not even, like, pretended level of potential to work together and I didn't know how to bridge the gap of "hey even though we won't tell each other anything in-game, how's life?" and have it not seem disingenuous. So I'm glad that came out of last night. The Tony blindside definitely surprised me, and Jack coming back into the game over Colin. It really feels like it's Champ or bust with this vote but if we come to the risk of rocks, I see them possibly flipping. Now that I'm at Actual Final 6 I don't actually want to go to rocks anymore lol. It just feels like if we can get through tomorrow's vote we could get the rest of the way but who knows. If Zee has a third idol I'll lose my mind lmao. The way Kaleigh's still got her steal a vote and idol and I'm sitting over here with my flopped advantages. Sigh. Kind of incredible of her to only have one vote against her so far AND IT'S FROM ME. She's killing it. Wait. Do I have the most votes out of our 3? I do! Well, that's something I guess. Maybe I could have played a more fluid game, and tried to get the majority alliance to eat each other from the inside of it, but there's no point in thinking about that now. I'm at Final 6 and that's very neat.

Champ

I’m running late again for the confession, anyways here for a good time! Not a long time LMFAO

Zee

Haven't heard from Jack all day, Champ messaged once. I'm pretty sure I'm going home tonight

Tribal Council

Zee: LOST VOTE

Champ: Alex (ROCKS ROCKS ROCKS)

Kaleigh: Zee (IF YOU HAVE A THIRD IDOL ISTG)

Kaleigh (Zee’s Stolen Vote): Zee

Alex: Zee (You’ve played SUCH a good game, and for all I know, you could still be here after this vote. It genuinely wouldn’t surprise me lmao. But here’s hoping this works. I enjoyed our pre-swap talks.)

Michael: Zee (you’ve played a wonderful game, sorry we didn’t really play together but that’s how it goes 🤷🏾‍♂️)

Jack: Alex (sorry babes we ain’t working together)

[ahundredtimesover]

This is How We Break | JJK

Pairing: Jungkook x (f.) Reader 

Genre/Tags: exes au; angst, fluff, smut (18+)

Warnings: foul language, alcohol consumption, motorcycle driving under the influence, motorycle accident, break-up and post-break up pain, sexual content (unprotected sex but be safe please!), JK has a tattoo sleeve and eyebrow piercing (18+)

Word count: 20.6k

Summary: There are things you prepared for coming back home and that includes seeing your ex-boyfriend, but helping him design his apartment isn’t one of them. From meetings over coffee and lunches with your friends, you both learn more about the time in-between, and what you find out leave you heartbroken, wondering if there’s enough of you left to try to get back what you’d lost.

“You know what they say about past lovers remaining friends? It’s either they never loved each other to begin with, or they still do. And we all know how much they loved each other, don’t we?”

A/N: Another exes AU? Where someone leaves then comes back?? 🤔 YUP!! I wasn’t supposed to write this so soon but things are hard and I needed an outlet.

~~// These italics refer to flashbacks // ~~

Listen to: Two Ghosts and Falling by Harry Styles

##

The thrumming of your heart drowns out the music and your friends’ laughter from the backseat, as if taunting you to only focus on its beating. But not even Jimin and Areum’s narration of their botched dine in the dark experience and Yoongi’s snickers and soft hums can calm you down.

“Hey.” Your best friend next to you pulls your ear to get your attention. “You okay?”

You open your eyes but focus on the street outside. “Yeah, just nervous to see everyone.”

“Don’t be. Everyone misses you,” Yoongi comforts.

“Everyone?” You raise an eyebrow. 

“Well, almost everyone,” he laughs. 

“Gee, way to ease my nerves, Yoon,” you slightly punch his arm.

“I’m kidding” he says, as he pulls the brake to park. “But hey, you had weeks to prepare. You know you’re gonna see him. He doesn’t.”

The thought shouldn’t terrify you as much as it does. But Yoongi’s right. While you arrived just yesterday, your trip back home was a month in the making and in that timeframe, you resigned from your job in Australia, accepted a job offer in Seoul, got a place of your own… and went over the different scenarios that could play out tonight. 

Surprising your good friend Da-eun during her engagement party is one thing, but knowing you’ll see your ex-boyfriend there is another. It’s something you can’t avoid, given that she’s set to marry Namjoon, said ex’s best friend, so better to get over this as soon as possible.

It seems easier said than done, though, as you don’t really know what to expect. 

It’s been three years since you packed your bags and left the only home you’d ever known and you haven’t heard from or of him since. It helps when you’ve got friends who know you well enough to not talk about him with you. And while the breakup wasn’t bad, it doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt. That was seven years of your life, and that’s long enough to have you lose parts of yourself you’d never get back.

You shrug off the thoughts, knowing it wouldn't be a good idea to dive into your feelings right now, minutes before you see him. 

Areum opens the door for you and entangles her arm with yours as you walk the block to your friend’s place. “We’ve got your back, okay?” She affirms. “Tell us when it gets too much and we’ll leave.”

“I’ve had a month’s worth of pep talk from you guys and myself. I’ll be fine, you don’t have to worry about me.”

“Still an option,” Jimin chimes in. “Jungkook was the love of your life at one point, ___. I don’t think any amount of pep talk can really prepare you for seeing him again.”

This time, you hate that Jimin’s right. 

Areum rings the doorbell and shortly after, Da-eun’s sing-song voice greets you, followed by a shriek and inaudible words as you’re enveloped in a hug. 

“Holy shit. ___, is that you?” A familiar deep voice calls out, prompting you to look up at the tall figure standing before you.

“Hi, Joon. It’s me,” you giggle, as your friend pulls away. “Congratulations by the way.”

“I— wow,” the man says, slack jawed. “We didn’t know you’d actually be here. I mean, we sent the invitation as an FYI and—“

“Are you telling me I’m not wanted here?” You playfully cock an eyebrow. 

“No, of course not. We miss you a lot,” Namjoon flashes his comforting dimpled smile. “It’s just… you left so abruptly and we just… didn’t think you’d come back.”

There’s a pang in your chest at his words that you disregard. “Well, I’m here. For good. For now at least,” you smile back. “I hope you have space for one more.”

“Of course, please come in.”

Da-eun drags you inside, excitedly chatting you up and scheduling lunch with you the next day. Your eyes scan the apartment while you listen, greeting and hugging the several people you recall from your college days. 

You do a double take as you settle on a familiar set of doe-eyes, but they’re not hiding behind long dark locks like they used to. 

He has a glass in hand, laughing with a guy in a beret, and even from where you are, you already know what he sounds like.

Surely, no pep talk can prepare you for this. He’s in black jeans and a printed ivory polo, sleeves rolled up to this elbow to reveal his right tattooed arm. He’s got multiple jewelry on both ears and even on his eyebrow, which are easily seen because of his short hair that’s parted in the side. 

You smile at the thought, as he’d long ago ranted about wanting tattoos and piercings but that having them wouldn’t sit well with his parents, given their aspirations for him to become a lawyer, which he was on the way to achieving. You wonder if they’d stopped nagging him about it.

He looks more refined and mature now, if you’re being honest. More than anything, he looks happy. 

You smile at this until he meets your gaze, choking on the drink that’s halfway down his throat. His eyes squint to try to get a better look at you, a habit of his that you always adored. You giggle at this and make your way towards him, your friends urging you with their looks.

You walk around the other people in the living room and by the time you’re near him, his friend has wandered away.  

“___?” His questioning voice greets you.

Looking at him up close causes your heart to skip a beat. He’s even more handsome than you remember, with his cute nose he used to boop yours with, his sharp jawline that got your attention when you met at a college event, and his expressive eyes that always revealed his emotions without him even saying them. 

He has a certain glow that you’re unsure you’ve ever seen on him, and he looks absolutely beautiful.

“Hi, Jungkook. It’s been a while,” you give him a warm smile. “It’s so nice to see you again.”

“Three years is a while?” He giggles, his eyes crinkling, his small laugh a sound that used to make you melt, a stark contrast to his strength and now, to his tattooed and pierced look. 

“You know me and my sense of time,” you return.

“I do, actually.” He mirrors your smile. “But it’s nice to see you, too.”

~~

You groan at the faint knock on your door, curious as to its unsure sound but irked at its timing. It had been another sleepless night. Waking up at 5AM, you decided to just do the chores that you’re in charge of this weekend, since your roommates Jimin and Areum are off to another out-of-town date and Yoongi is in his hometown to watch a concert.

You finished half an hour ago and had fallen asleep with the TV on - a usual Sunday occurrence whether you clean or not. Work is tiring enough as it is and your once energetic and wandering self has slowly lost its inspiration to do your weekend market explorations and ice cream runs by the river. 

Your mind has stepped on the brake of making plans, of trying out new things, of joining your friends on weeknights or even weekends for some karaoke or drinks at a rooftop bar. 

The 7-day week is just not enough, even more so a 2-day weekend. Saturdays are usually spent with Jungkook, and Sunday is the only time you have for yourself, which you usually spend sleeping or chowing down your favorite ice cream or watching your house flipping shows. 

It’s why you’re confused when you see your boyfriend standing by your door, with an expression on his face that you can’t quite read. You used to be good at that, figuring him out, but it seems that you haven’t been good at it for a while.

“Kook? What are you doing here?” 

Jungkook knows you don’t mean it in a bad way, but it doesn’t mean it doesn’t hurt any less. He remembers a time when you’d excitedly ask him when the next time you’d see him would be. He realizes now that you haven’t done that in a long while. There used to be elation when he’d tell you that he could spare some time aside from your usual Saturday house dates. He realizes, too, that he hasn’t heard that squeal nor seen the eye-reaching smile you used to greet him with for some time.

Perhaps it’s another sign he was hoping he wouldn’t get. 

You were supposed to see each other yesterday but you had a work event and he didn’t mind, as he had a paper to work on, too. 

“Alright, I’ll see you next week,” you’d said. Not even Sunday, which would’ve been today. 

He thought about that a lot; too much, in fact, that he didn’t finish his paper. He didn’t actually get much done for the rest of the week, failing his graded recitation and barely passing a pop quiz. 

There was a time when you’d make time out to visit him in his dorm near the university if he was too busy to see you on a weekend. It didn’t matter if it was too far from your place, or if you were too tired. You’d go regardless because you wanted to see him.

He realized yesterday that he doesn’t remember the last time you’d visited him there. 

You hadn’t seen each other in three weeks - work and law school have done that to both of you. That last time you were together was just like any - he came over to your place, like he had whenever you agreed to meet up. He brought lunch, you had sex, then tried to watch a movie you both passively decided on, had sex again, slept, then you ordered dinner. The same thing that happened the week before that. Then the week before that. And before that.

It wasn’t the stagnancy that bothered him; it was your passiveness. Your dates used to consist of cafe hopping and shopping and hitting the gym - a little something for each of your interests - but somewhere along the way, you’d both resigned to staying at your place. Sex and food. They’d become the only things you now shared. 

But it was still time with you, and he always enjoyed it wherever you spent it, no matter how little, and regardless of what you did. But he can’t really say the same for you.

It’s not that you don’t have time for each other anymore - that never seemed to be an issue. “We don’t find time for each other, Kook,” you used to say. “We make time.” Now you barely do. 

You used to send texts that you miss him already after he’d just left your apartment. You used to send him new date spots you’d found online or a new restaurant you wanted to try or a new movie that’s out. You used to be excited for study and work dates. 

You used to make itineraries for trips you’ll both take one day.

You used to remind him about how simple you want his proposal to be.

You used to urge him to visualize your wedding theme and laugh about the entrance songs you’d have.

You used to go over baby names and the kinds of bedtime stories you’d tell them.

That day when you didn’t bring him to the door for a goodbye kiss is when it hit him - he doesn’t remember the last times. The proper date. The thoughtful gift. The calendared trips. 

The planned future. The one you used to be so sure about. The one you made him believe in. The one you’re supposed to share together. 

His mind has been paying more attention to things since then and it sent him into a spiral. You’ve never felt so far away from him. And he’d never felt more alone. 

Seven years with you and it’s the first time he’d ever felt this. Your sweet notes, your little gifts, your cute surprises, your loving looks, your soft caresses. Your emotion-filled ‘I love you’s.’ He used to hang on to them. But how can you hang onto something that’s been slowly withering away?

He doesn’t remember the last time he looked at you and felt loved. 

What hurts him more is that deep down, he knows exactly why. 

“Kook,” You repeat impatiently. “Is there something you need?”

You stand by your door with your arms crossed, as if it hadn’t been three weeks since the last time you’d seen each other. 

“Can we, uhm. Can we talk?” He asks nervously, unable to meet your eyes. 

You slowly drop your arms and turn your gaze away. “Yeah. I think we need to.”

//

Jungkook follows you to the living room where you pull aside the blanket on the couch and sit some feet away from him, your hands clasping together and throat drying. 

You let the silence envelop you both, something that’s been a companion of yours for the past year or so. The tension is much thicker now and as you glance at him, with his elbows on his knees and head buried in his hands, you know that the day you’d once dreaded has come. 

You feel your tears fall down as he releases a long breath, his sniffles following shortly after. From your peripheral vision, you can see his sweater paws cover his eyes.

He knows it. So do you. 

That’s why you both sit there, with the distance between you feeling even more suffocating, and you let your joint cries fill the space with the heartbreak that’s something you’re both slowly starting to accept.

“I thought it was normal,” he starts. “I actually thought it was good; that we’d gotten so used to each other, to the comfort, to everyday life, whether we were together or not. I didn’t realize it was us already falling apart. And I don’t really know when it started.”

But you knew. It started when the intimate moments lost their intimacy, when the ‘good mornings’ and ‘good nights’ lost their meaning somewhere along the way. It’s when the ‘how was your days’ were just out of habit, both of you being too preoccupied to read between the lines. It’s when the conversations only revolved around him complaining about his professors and you about work. It’s when the silence lost its comfort, when everything else became noise. When missing him became too tiring, until you stopped missing him altogether. 

Truth be told, Jungkook knew it, too. It started when sex had become his form of stress relief, when the giggles and pillowtalk died down until he’d forgotten how they sounded like. When the weekend dates had slowly become a chore. It’s when he’d stopped asking if anything was wrong whenever you sounded upset or unreceptive, when he wouldn’t call back if you didn’t answer the first time. When he’d seen the admiration in your eyes turn to sadness, then resignation, then pity. It’s when you stopped trying, and so did he.

But neither one of you has the heart to voice these out, unwilling to accept them with finality - that somewhere down the road, you’d stopped fighting for each other. 

He turns to you, waiting until you turn to him, too. “I tried to make sense of it in my head because you always held me together, you know? I’d look at you and no matter how down or stressed or confused I was, you were always the answer.”

“And now?” You finally find your voice.

“Now?” He croaks. “I can’t look at you without feeling like I’m a failure. Because you look at me like one. And I can’t blame you.”

The tears waterfall down your face as you try to hold yourself together. You see him stop himself from reaching out to you, as he tucks his clenched fists under his arms. 

“Kook, you know I don’t mean that.”

“I’d rather that you do because that’s easier to accept than knowing that the love just died. That we just fell out of it. I’m losing you because I disappointed you, because I failed you, not because we stopped loving each other.”

“Why is that easier?” You question. 

“Because I can blame myself. And I would rather that I carry that blame than you.”

“Is that how you want this to end? Me blaming you?”

“What would you blame yourself for?”

“We don’t have to blame anyone. It doesn’t have to be someone’s fault,” you argue. “I don’t want you to carry this with you.”

“But I will, because I know this is on me,” he says with a heavy sigh. “At least, that’s where I trace it to. I’m the one who failed law school more than once, but I keep trying because I don’t know what else to do, because I can’t break my parents’ hearts and so I end up breaking yours. You talk about your 10-year plan with me and I can’t even think past tomorrow.”

Jungkook wipes the tears that he can no longer control. “That’s not fair to you, to keep on waiting for me to get my shit together. Because I know you’re tired, you’ve been waiting so long. That’s why you stopped trying.”

“And that’s not fair to you, too.” You fill the silence with your words.

“I don’t know how not to love you, but I also know I’m not doing it right anymore. I’m not what you need anymore, ___.” 

It hit him like a truck that day, looking at you as he went out the door, searching for the light of your smile and finding that the sparkle in your eyes was no longer there. He doesn’t know how to bring those back. 

“I haven’t been good to you, Kook. You’re not the only one disappointing the person you love,” you admit. “But I’ve given so much of myself and my time for you and I don’t know how much longer I can do that. I keep thinking of future ‘us’ because how we are now isn’t making either one of us happy anymore.” 

It was an epiphany on your end as you cried to Areum one day, thinking of the immense love you have for someone you’d spent the last seven years with, but how that has plateaued and you’re finding that it’s not enough for it to see you through another year anymore. Seven years is too long a time to not be moving forward.

Move in together, get engaged, get married, have children. It’s a future you’d held onto until you could no longer imagine how that would look like, with all the time that's passed. The excitement of all the things you’d do together died down, and you’d found it hard to look forward to anything. 

“I can’t have you keep waiting for me and I can’t keep disappointing you, ___.”

There’s a quiet and mutual acceptance of how things are. It’s ironic how in the moment when all the emotions and issues are expressed, it’s the time you both agree. 

That’s what happens sometimes. People don’t just grow apart, they stop growing in love, too.

He moves closer to your crying form and takes your hand in his. He kisses it, slowly, as if to savor your touch one last time. He doesn’t want to do more, afraid he’ll want to take everything back, so he settles for this. His goodbye.

You bask in this, too, the feel of his lips on your skin, an effort to soothe your hearts that are aching. There’s pain, but there’s trust that it was not intended, that it was not meant to hurt. It only does because it was real. The love is there, it’s just not what you both need. 

You look at him with a smile, the warmest one you’ve given him in a while. Amidst a flow of tears, you mouth your ‘I love you’s,’ and you keep in your heart the hope that if you don’t find each other again in this lifetime, you will in the next. Maybe then it’ll be enough, and you could spend the rest of your lives together. You hope. And that’s  your goodbye.

Jungkook stands up and heads out. He looks at you one last time. There’s still no light in your smile nor a sparkle in your eyes. If he’s lucky, maybe he’ll see them again one day. 

The door clicks and your world shatters. Quietly, but surely. Just like how it ended. No fight, no raised voices, no gasping for air, no pleading to fix it. 

It’s part of life, you think - you hurt as much as you love, and the way you feel right now only tells you one thing - you love him with everything you have. 

//

The days turn into weeks. 

You go through everyday as usual, but with weekends spent at your parents’ and some weeknights with Areum, Jimin, and Yoongi at a cafe or a park. 

Your friends have gotten used to your silence, though. They hold your hand when it starts to shake, sleep next to you when you’re unable, remind you of basic things when you forget, finish your sentence because you lose your train of thought.

This is how you break. Slowly. It’s not sobbing while you eat ice cream. It’s quietly crying - while you take a shower, while you make your coffee, while you lie in bed at night. It’s not the pounding in your head nor the excruciating pain in your chest. It’s feeling like there’s nothing inside you - just hollow and numb. How are you supposed to feel when half of you is gone? 

But that part of you that’s left thrives. It continues to live and hope and seek that excitement, seek that joy somewhere, anywhere. 

It’s two months later during breakfast when you tell them.

“I’m pushing through with the design course in Melbourne,” you say in between sips of your coffee. 

Areum can’t help the smile on her face. “The one you deferred last year?”

You nod. 

It was an impulsive application, as you were on a high from your visit to your sister. Jungkook couldn’t join you because of school so you’d gone on your own and fell in love with the city. You joked about moving there, but deep down it was a desire you suppressed because your life had always been here. The love of your life was here. There’s nothing keeping you from leaving now.

“I think it’ll be good,” Jimin says. “You talk about it all the time. I always felt like you just needed a reason to leave. Now you do.”

It’s another month later when it finally happens. 

“I’ll miss you but I hope you find it,” Yoongi whispers as you give him the final hug.

“Find what?”

“Yourself? Your joy? Your inspiration? Whatever it was that you lost here. I hope you find it.”

“What about love, Yoon?” You ask, genuinely curious.

“That’ll follow, ___.” He smiles, and it’s that push you need to enter the airport gates, off the place where you hope you’ll find all those things, too.

//

The days turn into weeks. 

Jungkook goes through a dizzying roller coaster of emotions. Some mornings he wakes up energized - he goes through his readings with ease, aces his recitation, and analyzes the assigned cases well. 

Some nights he can’t sleep, tossing and turning in his bed, trying to erase the image of you from his mind. The pain is constant, demanding itself to be felt, reminding him of what he lost, of what he didn’t fight for. 

Losing you had been effortless, but why is it becoming more difficult convincing himself that he did what he had to? 

It’s in the third month when he realizes he’s been at the bottom far longer than usual, feeling like a shell of the man he once was, losing focus, finding himself lost and uninspired. 

“I just feel like I need to see her,” Jungkook tells Namjoon and Jin, his college roommates and best friends, over bottles of beer. “I just… I need to hear her tell me that I’m okay, that I’ll get through this.”

“Why do you need to hear it from her? We tell you this everyday, Jungkook.” Jin eyes Namjoon, as the pair tries to get a feel of who should be the comforter or the reality checker this time. 

“I’m lost and confused and I miss her. Maybe when I look at her this time, I’ll know the answer.”

“What if you see her and still feel like a failure?” Jin asks.

Jungkook stares into his empty glass. “Isn't that still an answer?”

It’s shortly after when he decides to go to your place, his heart beating out of his chest. He left parts of himself with you here and he’s desperate to find even the smallest pieces to feel even a semblance of the man he was when he was with you.

Curious eyes greet him as the door opens, something that Jungkook returns. Da-eun is a good friend of yours but had always lived with her wealthy parents; he’d rarely seen her here.

“Can I see her?” He asks.

“She’s… she’s not here, Jungkook.”

“I can wait then,” he sighs. “I just… I just need to see her.”

“I mean, she’s not here anymore,” Da-eun responds, the sadness in her voice permeating through his veins. “She left a week ago.”

“Where… where did she go?”

“Australia, to her sister.” Yoongi appears in the hallway, a sullen look on his face. “She’s there to study and work, thinking that a change of scenery would be good.”

The hole in Jungkook’s heart comes out of nowhere, and he feels it getting bigger by the second. Suddenly he can’t breathe. 

“She loved it there,” Jungkook stammers. “I missed that trip with her. She used to say she couldn’t wait for us to go together.” He sighs. “I’m glad she made the move.”

Yoongi and Da-eun watch him try to hold himself up, seeking support by the door as he furiously wipes the tears from his eyes. 

“She left a few things,” Yoongi says. “You’re free to take them if you want.”

“That’s not necessary,” Jungkook replies, head down as he wills his cries to stop. “I’ll go ahead. Thanks, guys.”

“Take care of yourself,” are the last words he hears as he walks away.

They fall on deaf ears, as two weeks later, Jungkook hears the loud banging on his door and the jingling of keys. 

He’s ready for the lecture, for his friends to pull him from underneath the covers and slap some sense into him. But they don’t happen. 

Instead he hears the clanking of broken glass, of his bookshelf being propped back up on the wall, of his books being stacked on top of each other. And then it’s his dishes being washed, then the washing machine turning on, then some more sweeping, and more things being arranged. 

“There’s a place to go if you want to destroy things,” Namjoon says. “Don’t do that to your home.”

“This isn’t home,” Jungkook sighs.

“We’ll take you there,” Jin says, sitting on the edge of the bed and removing the pillows and blankets over his friend. “Your parents asked us to fix your papers, file your LOA then drive you back to Busan.” 

Jungkook sits up, puffy eyes and dark crescent moons painted underneath. His collarbones and ribs are protruding without effort. “I didn’t get my answer. She left even before I could.”

“Maybe you’ll find it somewhere else.” Namjoon kneels next to him. “Whatever it is, it’s not here.” There’s a crack in his voice that Jungkook’s never heard before. “Do it for yourself, Kook. Do it for her.” 

Jungkook looks at his best friends, fear and worry painted on their faces. There was you, then his parents, then his friends. He’s run out of people to disappoint. He can’t do any worse than this.

“I don’t know what to do,” he sobs, burying his face in his hands. “Please, take me home.”

This is how he breaks. Like he was floating aimlessly until he crashed to the ground, the shell of what he once was shattering at the impact, with pieces of himself scattering all over. It was a false sense of comfort, thinking that he’d be okay with losing you, knowing that this was his choice, his call. That he could live with the blame like he’d said, but he was wrong. The pain cuts through like a knife, and he’s afraid he’d let it stay there.

~~

Life is funny sometimes, Jungkook thinks. 

He has a favorite black jacket that he left at your apartment all those years ago; it was in the box that Yoongi offered for him to take the day that Jungkook went looking for you only to learn you’d already left. He said no then, but later changed his mind. It was something you’d bought him and a piece of your relationship he wanted to keep, so weeks after that day, he went back to your place with Namjoon. It was that day when his best friend met Da-eun.

Three years later, Jungkook reunites with you at the engagement party of your friends, who’d met because of a jacket that he just had to retrieve. One that is currently hanging inside the coat closet of this very apartment. 

He can’t help but laugh at the thought. 

“What is it?” You giggle, knowing his tendency to zone out then laugh at something he remembers.

“I was just thinking we can claim that those two lovebirds are getting married because of us,” Jungkook motions towards your friends, hands wrapped around each other’s waists, entertaining the guests.

“We can,” you chuckle, thinking back to Da-eun shyly telling you over your weekly video call with your best friends some years ago about her liking Namjoon. “That should be part of your wedding speech for him.”

“Oh it will be. That way I can claim that I did something for him for once in our lives.”

“Hmm,” you sip on your champagne. “I can’t wait to hear that speech.”

Jungkook’s ears perk up. “Glad to know you’ll still be here by then.”

“I’m back for good, Jungkook,” you peer at him. “I’ll definitely be here, for their wedding, their baby shower, their kid’s 5th birthday. I’ll be here for everything.”

“Melbourne wasn’t all you thought it would be?” He smiles with a cocked eyebrow, wishing you wouldn’t take it the wrong way. And you don’t.

“Oh, it was everything I thought it would be,” you smile. “But I’d taken what I needed from there, found whatever it was I was looking for.”

Jungkook doesn’t prod, unsure if he’s ready to find out what you mean, which really could be anything. But seeing you now after so long, looking even more beautiful than he remembers, he doesn’t want to break this little bubble you’ve both created in the past 5 minutes since you walked over to greet him. 

“If that’s the case, I’m really happy for you ____."

“Thank you, that means a lot, Jungkook.” 

You mirror his smile, one that he missed so much. It’s what he stopped seeing on you during that last year of your relationship, and this is what he hoped then, that you’d have this look on you once more. 

He sips on his glass, his lifted arm revealing a bit of the tattoos decorated there.

“And you?” You gesture to the black ink. “Your parents finally convinced that tattoos can actually be covered and you wouldn’t go to court and meet clients in short sleeves?”

“Well, they’re still not crazy about the idea, but as a guy who runs his own video production company, I don’t need to hide it, do I?” He smirks.

Your lips part and your eyes widen in amusement. “You did it? I mean, you’ve only talked about it in passing but… wait, what about law school?”

“It wasn’t for me. I mean, I think failing classes multiple times should’ve been the giveaway,” he scratches the back of his neck. “But yeah, my parents kinda figured that out, too.”

The silence is palpable but it’s not tense nor awkward. You’re just looking at him, trying to wrap your head around what he’d just said. 

“Taehyung is actually running it with me,” he motions to the guy in a beret whom he was talking to earlier.

The said man pipes in. “There you go, about time you mention me.” He turns to you with a sweet smile and puts his hand out. “I’m Taehyung.”

“Hi,” you return. “I’m ___.”

“Oh,” Taehyung says with a slightly embarrassed look. He recovers with another smile, shaking his head. “You. I mean—“ he winces at Jungkook’s glare. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“So, business partners, you say?” 

“Yeah. We were actually schoolmates in elementary and met up again as a pair of lost, 20-somethings living off our parents’ hard-earned money,” Taehyung says nonchalantly. “One day we just said, screw it, let’s set up our own business. Thanks to my charms, we got things rolling.”

“Yes, it was all totally because of his charms,” Jungkook playfully rolls his eyes.

“He’s a pretty good video guy, too,” Taehyung adds, causing laughter from all three of you.

“That sounds amazing, really. I mean, I didn’t know you went back to Busan,” you tell Jungkook.

“I needed a change of scenery, I guess. But we saw an opportunity here. We’ve filmed music videos for some of the artists that Namjoon wrote songs for so we had a pretty good start.”

His smile is shy but it’s genuine, and even then, he holds himself with so much pride. Jungkook always enjoyed being behind the camera, offering his services to friends back in college for any school project that needed filming done. 

You always thought it was a viable career option for him but his parents never thought so, adamant that becoming a lawyer was the direction for him. You knew it was their frustration and had wanted Jungkook to live out their dream, and he just followed because it was the only path he’d known. 

And now, you can tell how fulfilled he is, as both men share stories of the videos they filmed and the clients they’ve catered to. They also film for advertisements and a few events. It’s just been over a year but it seems like they’re a pretty on-demand duo.

“What about you? I don’t think I’ve seen you around yet,” Taehyung states with a slightly innocent smile on his face.

You don’t know how much he knows but you indulge him anyway. “I just got back from Australia yesterday, actually. I was away for three years.”

“Hmm,” Taehyung cocks an eyebrow. “Any reason why you came back?”

“A dream job offer,” you smile. “I get to work on design and write about it.”

“Oh you’re a designer? Maybe you could—“ Taehyung gets cut off by a glass on his mouth that isn’t by his own doing.

“Finish your drink, Tae, so you can sober up quickly and drive home safely,” Jungkook says. “Can you grab me a beer when you get your water? Thank you!” He says, pushing his friend away.

“And you’re not sobering up?” You giggle.

“Joon asked me to sleep over,” Jungkook smiles as he finishes his drink. “But yeah, maybe I should slow down a bit so I could make sure that Jin doesn’t further embarrass himself in front of that girl he likes.” He motions to his other best friend, who’s clearly drunk trying to do a handstand.

“Oh my god, he hasn’t changed one bit,” you chuckle. 

Jungkook joins you in laughter until he excuses himself to help Jin out. You settle with your friends with their smug faces, asking how the little reunion went.

“Better than I expected. I mean, I didn’t embarrass myself and he doesn’t seem to hate me,” you say. “And he’s been doing so well and I think he’s really happy.”

“You still read him so well, huh?” Areum nudges you.

“When we broke up and for a time before that, he barely looked me in the eyes. In those 20 minutes we were talking, that’s all he did.”

**

“I’m just saying, I learned proper client engagement from Tae and he always badgered me about looking the person you’re talking to in the eyes. I was just applying what I learned,” Jungkook raises his arms up in surrender.

“Yeah, but she’s not your client and that seemed more,” Jin states matter-of-factly as he pops a fry in his mouth. 

It’s the next week and Namjoon and Da-eun had invited you all for lunch to go over some wedding details.

“You were just imagining things,” Jungkook laughs. 

He may lie to his friends but he won’t lie to himself - seeing you was something he wasn’t expecting, as basing it on your social media account, you seemed to be really enjoying Melbourne. He’d only heard from his friends that you were invited to the engagement party but didn’t hold out hope you’d actually come. It's also one thing to show up but another to actually be staying here for good.

You looked so beautiful that night, in your black and white polka-dotted dress and red heels. You had a glow about you and he just needed to know if the light in your smile was back and if the sparkle in your eyes had returned.

They have, and he wanted to savor them until the next time he could see them again.

The teasing continues until the familiar sounds of your friends’ voices echo in the walls of the restaurant. There you are, too, that glow radiating off of you. While you laugh with a man with platinum-colored hair, who pulls the chair for you to sit on. Right in front of Jungkook.

“Hi,” you smile, like you didn’t just cause a tiny crack in his heart. 

“This is Hoseok, by the way.” You motion to the man next to you. “Met him in Melbourne and he’s home to visit family.”

You briefly meet Jungkook’s gaze before he turns away. Maybe last week had just been out of excitement, you think.

Hoseok quickly engages with the group, especially with Da-eun whom he’d bonded with the few times she visited you. Things feel so natural, with Jin as the resident entertainer asking Hoseok questions to ease the tension, until he says, “so you and ___ are just friends?”

You and Hoseok look at each other before you giggle. 

“Yes, I have a partner back home,” Hoseok confirms. 

Jungkook doesn’t miss the smirk that your friend gives him, and he releases the breath he didn’t know he was holding. 

He’d only hoped for that light and that sparkle to return to your face and for that moment when he thought it was because of another man, that nook in his heart and his mind that cradled that thought of you holding out for him, shriveled a bit. 

Jungkook may have handled himself well that first night he saw you unexpectedly, but with you back home for good, carrying with you the life and memories you created without him, it makes him wonder if he’ll be able to make it through, seeing how you’re both now bonded by the love that your friends are now sharing.

Lunch goes by smoothly, with conversations flowing, inside jokes being shared, and plans being made as you count down the months to the wedding, with the engaged pair insisting that they want to spend as much time with their friends as possible.

The discussion ends up being about Jungkook and Taehyung’s company, how they started, and how they’re slowly establishing a market.

“We’re actually going to be featured in a magazine,” Taehyung announces. “Well, Jungkook is. They’re touting him as someone to watch out for because of his video creating brilliance. It’s good marketing.”

“I thought you’re the charmer?” You tease.

“Yeah, with the oldies. They’re whipped for me,” Taehyung smirks. “But this guy,” he points to Jungkook, “he’s the real crowd pleaser. One look at him then the clients want to contract us right away. I mean, why wouldn’t they? Look at him!” 

Jungkook playfully slaps Taehyung’s hand off his face, as his friend pinches his cheeks and chin.

You internally blush because there’s no denying that Jungkook had gotten more handsome the past years, and while you were initially not sold on it when you were together, you’ve got to admit that the tattoos and piercings add to his attractiveness. 

“So, how’s the magazine feature coming along,” you query.

“It’s three months away, actually. I had to request to move the date because we're swamped with projects and I wanted to focus on those,” Jungkook explains.

“He’s semi-lying because actually,” Taehyung now slaps his friend’s hand away from him, “he just moved out of our shared place and into his own apartment because I don’t know, he’s grown up now or someth— ouch!”

“The photoshoot is supposed to be done there as like a ‘get-to-know the creator’ type of thing and well,” Namjoon continues, far from Jungkook who can’t touch him. “It’s not photoshoot worthy, let’s just say.”

“Why not?” You ask.

“It’s so bare and uninspiring,” Jin pipes in. “Who would believe someone creates there?”

“It’s because I do the creating in my office,” Jungkook rolls his eyes.

“And that’s why we convinced you to get your own place so you’d actually not live in the office anymore and have an actual home,” Jin rolls his eyes back. “Seriously, ___. His office is basically his living studio with a mattress and a makeshift kitchenette. It’s not working.”

“Thanks, I appreciate the support,” Jungkook says sarcastically.

“But that is great marketing, letting readers into your home. Adds to the image of the company,” you smile.

“Yeah, it just needs to actually look like a home,” Taehyung says.

“I’m working on it,” Jungkook grunts. “I have some furniture already and I don’t wanna spend a lot on interior designers who'll just design it the way they want then I’ll have to live with it all for a small magazine feature.”

“You literally can tell them what you want, Jungkook. They consult you, you know,” Areum pipes in.

“Yeah but I don’t like talking.” Jungkook sinks in his seat, feeling exposed in front of you this way.

“Well, if it’s about just designing a space, ___ can do that for you,” Hoseok states this time. “That’s literally how we met. My fashion studio needed some beautification and that’s what she did!”

“Totally. We used the best friend card when she advised us on how to design our apartment,” Jimin says.

“You can use the ex-boyfriend card,” Yoongi snickers. 

You’re the one scowling now.

Everyone erupts in laughter and he flashes you his gummy smile in apology even if he knows he’s gonna get scolded by you later.

“There’s no need,” Jungkook shyly smiles. “I can manage.”

Maybe it’s because of how soft he looks right now, or how proud you are of him for putting himself out there when he’d always been so shy to do so. Maybe it’s wanting to help him out, knowing that it’ll be good for the company.

Or maybe it’s yearning to peek into his world, explore what you left behind, be selfish in wanting to see if there are still parts of you remaining. 

“I’ll do it,” you exclaim, prompting him to turn to you with wide eyes. “I can’t really call myself an interior designer but I work in design and I’ll help in whatever way I can.”

Jungkook’s words get stuck in his throat, as his mind wanders to the time he’ll be spending with you if he agrees, especially if it will be just the two of you. 

But he’s nodding as you tell him that you’re offering your services but he doesn’t have to respond right away, given that you also have a schedule that he’ll have to work around. 

It’s a week later when a few of your friends are at your apartment, sort of a welcome thing that Areum and Da-eun convinced you to have since you’ve been away for so long, that Jungkook finds you in your tiny balcony, looking out at the city.

“Hey, is it okay if I join you?” A familiar voice asks. You’d been out here to get some air and alone time, after you’d helped Hoseok puke his guts out and tucked him in your bed for the night. 

“Sure.” You make space next to you and motion for Jungkook to take his place by your side. 

“How are you liking it back home?” He asks.

“It’s been great,” you smile. “I got my family over this week since I’ve spruced up the place. I’ve been seeing some friends, too, and I really have missed everyone.”

“Your place looks really good, ___. I’d be stupid not to accept your offer of working on mine.”

He’s biting his lips and not meeting your gaze, and you giggle at how nervous he looks. He used to ask for your help over the littlest things before because he wanted to spend time with you even if it was just you editing his paper while you were sandwiched between his legs. Now he looks so shy considering it and it feels bittersweet.

“Yes, you’d be,” you laugh. “It’s a once-in-a-lifetime quality service I’m offering here. Plus I’m letting you use the ex-boyfriend card so just pay for my coffee and we’re good.”

“___, I can’t not pay you.”

“I won’t accept it if you insist,” you smile.

“Fine. Can I add lunch to that payment?”

There’s sincerity in his eyes, a quiet confidence that appeared out of nowhere. 

Jungkook thought about this for a week, what spending time with you would mean. He’s not usually an overthinker, but he couldn’t help it with you. He’s missed you, thought about you a lot while you were away, and he’d only hoped for your return. Now you’re back and he’s drawn to you again, like how he was over a decade ago when you’d first met. There’s no hidden agenda, just pure desire to catch up. 

“Lunch would be wonderful,” you try to not sound too excited. 

You’d thought about this for a week, too. You tried not to think of him when you were away, afraid that any moment of weakness would convince you to go back. But after seeing him, you’d just been longing to know how he’d been, how life has been like. It’s genuine, the care you have for him. You’re seeing in his eyes that it’s the same for him, too.

“I hope this isn’t weird, though,” he laughs. “I mean, we, uh…” He scratches the back of his head.

“We agreed on the breakup, Jungkook. It was heartbreaking but I hope you know I wasn’t angry or anything,” you clarify. “I’m sorry I left without saying goodbye but—“

“You had to,” he stammers. “I… Well, you always talked about Australia and you took the chance to move there when you did. I just hope I got to tell you how proud I was of you. And happy. I'm really happy for you.”

He holds your gaze and you can’t help the warmth you’re feeling at his words. 

“I’m really proud and happy for you, too, Jungkook. You’re doing what you love to do, and I can only imagine the hard work it took for you to get here,” you say, wanting to hold his hand in comfort but stopping yourself.

“Thank you, that means a lot.”

“So don’t make this weird and I won’t,” you tease. “We can look at your place next week, then we can meet again and I can show you my plans.”

“Sounds good, ___. Coffee before my place, then.”

**

You’ve missed the warmth and energy of a cafe in Seoul, and you try not to think too much about how searching for a new one to try used to be one of your favorite dates with Jungkook. 

Your eyes are wandering, appreciating the minimal design yet cozy feel of the cafe when the door opens and Jungkook comes in, clad in ripped jeans and a plain white shirt, greets the barista, and searches the place. He breaks into a smile as he sees you and you stand to greet him in reflex, realizing what that implies.

You stand in front of each other awkwardly, until you both burst into laughter.

“Oh, what the hell? We’re having coffee. Come here,” he opens his arms out and you approach him and hug him back, smiling into his white musk scent. 

“What does having coffee have anything to do with giving you a hug?” You giggle.

“Nothing, actually, I don’t know why I said that.”

You return his smile and proceed to order, with Jungkook recommending their best-sellers, all of which happen to be your favorites. It’s not lost on you that he knows this, too, but there’s comfort in knowing he hasn’t forgotten.

The food and drinks are decided on, with a slice of pie on the house because apparently, Jungkook’s team covered the launch of the cafe when it reopened after rebranding, hence why he's a regular here. 

“You sure it’s that and not because the server has a crush on you?” You cock an eyebrow, having noticed the flirty smile on the server’s face right as Jungkook entered.

“Hmm, maybe it is, but she’s written her number on the coffee cup multiple times and I never called; she probably got the message,” he shrugs.

“Oh wow, what a heartbreaker,” you tease. “Is that part of your image now, huh?” 

“Tae says it adds to the charm,” he states. “I guess it works though since she still gives me free food every time.”

You both laugh and the conversation takes off. He shows photos of his apartment and shares what he envisioned when he chose it, which isn’t much. He just needed space big enough to work in and do his exercise since he doesn’t want to spend on a gym membership. 

You make notes as you go and it’s not long after when you leave the cafe and walk the two blocks to his apartment.

“So, this is the place,” Jungkook says, as he stands in the middle of his semi-empty living room, boasting the “super comfy” leather couch he got for a cheap price online. 

It’s a nice loft that he got for a steal, he shares, with good storage space for his exercise equipment that he uses in the common area. The lone upstairs bedroom has a spacious corner, where he wishes to set up his working space. He likes the floor-to-ceiling windows that make up for the lack of outside space, which is fine since there’s a park not far away.

You watch him talk about what else he needs, which is definitely a lot, and he laughs at himself for some of the silly purchases he’s made because the low price attracted him, that last bit not surprising to you. 

In this space that is his own - far from the university dorm he didn’t like you visiting him in because of how tiny and unkept it was - where he can rest and create, he looks so free and so much more like himself. Even in your seven years together, it wasn’t a normal occasion seeing him look this proud and this happy. 

“I don’t want to limit your creativity so buy whatever you want, don’t mind my budget,” he breaks you out of your thoughts.

“Am I hearing this right?” You fake gasp. “Jeon Jungkook not minding the budget?”

He playfully rolls his eyes. “I obviously have terrible judgment when it comes to purchasing items but I trust you that you’ll make this place feel like home without breaking the bank,” he laughs.

There’s a glimmer in his eyes that you match and you want nothing more than for this place to be something he loves and be even more proud of. 

“This was a good purchase and I promise you it’ll look better once we’ve spruced it up. I want you to be really happy here, you deserve it,” you say softly.

“I know I will be,” he returns. 

He breaks the comfortable silence by offering to tour you around and taking photos of the areas you ask. He takes you upstairs and begs for you to find him a nice bed so he could replace the mattress he took from his apartment with Taehyung. You assure him of this and ask more questions about how he wants his bedroom to look and what kind of storage he needs.

“Not much,” he says. “I’ve just got a few personal things in here and most of them I’d rather keep in the boxes.” 

He doesn’t meet your gaze this time and there’s that thought in your head about which parts of you remain and that maybe, he feels it’s better to keep those in the boxes. Out of sight, out of mind, you think, and you can’t blame him. You left him in boxes, too, afraid of what you’d find if you dared open them. 

It’s cliche, but that box which held seven years of your life was kept in the far corner of your closet until you left them with your friends when you moved. It contained many things, like the hedgehog stuffed toy he bought when you said it was cute but couldn’t afford getting a pet, or the dandelion glass lamp he got you as a birthday gift because you insist that’s how fairies are made, or the multiple music boxes he’d find online and surprised you with because you said it was your comfort item. When you returned, they gave them back to you and there again, in the far corner of your closet, is where it lies. 

“I think I got everything I need here, Jungkook,” you finally say. “I got the photos and noted your wishlist and I’ll come up with a mood board to guide us.”

“I’ll wait for your call, then. Next time, let’s have lunch.”

**

With your respective busy schedules, you and Jungkook can only really meet on Sundays for a few hours of shopping, and that always includes lunch. After that first tour, you presented to him your plans, from the color palette to the affordable items you found online. You saved on labor costs by assigning his best friends on paint duty and your friends on furniture assembly responsibilities. 

Taehyung convinced Jungkook to have you work on the other rooms that won’t be featured in the photoshoot but still need some love, like his closet and bathroom. They all needed lighting, storage organizers, and design pieces so that they wouldn't look out of place.

You were happy to work on those and only cost you one Wednesday evening before the rest of the items like the pillows, rugs, and paintings arrived. 

It’s on that last Friday night, the day before the photoshoot, that you show up at Jungkook’s, ready for the final touches, as the linens and other decorative pieces were delivered as well. All your friends are set to arrive some time later, and you want to surprise them with the new look, as they haven’t seen the place since they helped out a few weeks ago. 

“I got you a little something, too.” You hand him the box with a bow on top and he cutely scrunches his eyebrows at the unexpected gift.  

“You’re the one doing this for free and now give me a gift, too?” He whines but proceeds to open it, his eyes widening in joy at the single-serve coffee maker that he was eyeing at one of the stores you went to. “You didn’t have to get me this.”

“My boss got a voucher and I sweetly asked her for it. I saved 40%,” you wink. 

That appeases him and he gets out the other things inside. You bite your lip as he looks at the scented candles you got him.

“You used to like the bamboo scent I had in my bathroom and just thought that you would… you know, want them here, too,” you say shyly, worried of what he might think.

His smile softens at the gesture because he does love this scent and had been looking for the ones you had but the brand name always escaped him. More than anything, it warms him that of all the gifts you could give, it was this, one that reminded you of your time together.

“I love it,” he says, smelling it. “Just like how I remember.”

You smile and turn away, then decide to work on his bedroom before your friends arrive while he cleans up in the living room and prepares it for dinner. 

You pull the crate that holds some of the pieces you’ll set up in the built-in shelf - a vintage camera, framed photos of his friends and family, basketball player figurines, and some decorative items. 

Clearly, this shelf isn’t made for not-so-tall people like you, as you try to grab on the sides and other things you can hold onto to keep your balance. As you try to place a frame on the top shelf, you mistakenly grab on a box that falls over before you could catch it, causing all its content to spill on the floor right next to you.

Movie tickets, birthday cards, little notes of good luck on your exam and I miss you, comic strip doodles, photo booth picture strips, and trinkets bring a surge of memories - all seven years of love and laughter and pain in a box. But this one doesn’t live in the far corner of his closet; it’s living on a shelf by his bed, where all his favorite things have found their home.

Jungkook quickly runs up the stairs at the sound of something falling, loudly asking if you’re okay, only to find you knelt down on the floor with a longing smile on your face.

“I was looking for this! I sure thought I lost it but it’s been with you all this time?” You giggle, picking up a photo strip that you both took during a college fair. “And oh my god, this was the cheesiest and cringiest thing I ever wrote to you,” you scowl at a love letter. “I told you to burn this!” 

You uncover more things and laugh at the ones you see, the memories vivid with each item you pick up.

Jungkook looks down at you, glassy eyes at the exposure of what he’d been keeping all this time - your memory, all kept in a box within his reach, because he never wanted to let go of it, hoping that one day, when you come back into his life, he can show you that though you said goodbye, it never meant it was the end. Not for him, at least.

He kneels down next to you and laughs along at the notebook of pick-up lines you made for him, and the collection of post-its that you left all over his dorm that one time you surprised him for his birthday, and the Halloween couple photos, and the mixtapes you made for him because they were “more organic than Spotify playlists.”

“Wow, I was such a hopeless romantic,” you laugh. 

“I mean, you were dating me. Can’t blame you,” he returns.

“God, you’re still a closeted cocky little shit,” you pinch his arm, causing him to squeal and your laughter blends with his, and it’s a sound you haven’t heard in a very long time, and you’d forgotten how much you missed it.

“Those were the best seven years of my life, you know?” Jungkook starts after the giggling has died down and you both scan the other items on the floor. “I’ll never trade them for anything. You were the best part of me and I wish I’d been better so that we didn’t have to let each other go.”

The silence is close to giving Jungkook a heart attack until you look at him with glassy eyes.

“You were the best part of me, too, Jungkook. I hope you know that, and however we ended, I’m just glad I get to meet you like this again,” you smile. “You have no idea how much it means to me that you’re happy. What these few weeks have shown me is that that's all I ever wanted.”

He wants to say more, that he was happy with you and that he could be happy again with you but the words get caught in his throat. He’s holding onto this, at the image of you holding pieces of your relationship in your hands, clutching them as if you don’t want to let go. 

But you do, eventually, as the doorbell rings, signalling the arrival of your friends.

“I’ll clean this up and leave it on the floor because I can’t reach it,” you grin.

He laughs. “I’ll get the door.”

And right as he leaves, the tears you were holding finally fall.

**

The photoshoot goes by smoothly, with Taehyung sending you photos throughout the day and giving you a play-by-play of the whole thing. Your eyes almost pop out of their sockets as you zoom in, seeing Jungkook wear a familiar black jacket, the one you’d gotten him. You knew he went back to your apartment years ago to retrieve it, as your friends narrated, given that it’s how Da-eun and Namjoon met. 

“Nice jacket,” you’d texted Jungkook after the shoot.

“They asked me to wear something nice and I always thought I looked good in this,” he replied. 

“You do. And not to inflate your ego but watch your clients increase once these photos are out.”

He laughed then, as your text conversation went on, which had become a regular occurrence, but you also weren’t wrong. The photoshoot and interview were indeed free marketing, as they were posted on social media and widely shared online. 

It gave their company exposure, and you as well. With your name credited for the design, as Jungkook insisted, you received a few inquiries about your services, which you happily took on the side. 

That only meant that both you and Jungkook became too busy to meet up again, although there was no agreement whatsoever about it. One of you would miss your friends’ regular get-togethers, and it’s two months after your last meeting when you see each other again at a fast food joint for breakfast, en route to a lake house in Gangwon. 

Work and wedding planning had been stressing Namjoon out, and he’d insisted on having everyone take the quick hour drive to a place he’d discovered, perfect for relaxing with the lake and mountains as background. It quickly became an anticipated event, as it’s the first time that both Namjoon’s and Da-eun’s friends would go together on a trip. Even Taehyung and Hoseok, who’d extended his stay, were invited. 

“I’ve almost forgotten how hectic city life is back here,” you mumble over your afternoon beer as you all settle in the outdoor area, waiting for the noodles and grilled pork that some of the guys are preparing for lunch. “My sister and I would go sailing or drive to the peninsula every weekend in Melbourne.”

“Wow, that’s the life,” Da-eun says as she leans on Namjoon. “I was always jealous of your trips whenever we video called and you showed us where you were. Must’ve been really liberating, considering how stressful work was back here.”

You recall how years ago, working at an advertising agency sucked the life out of you. You were always craving for a trip out of town and everyone in your life then was always too busy to indulge you, especially Jungkook. The times that you did get Jimin, Areum, and Yoongi to go on a trip with you, your then-boyfriend rarely made it. 

“It was, and I enjoyed it very much,” you reply. It came with a price, though, as every trip you took just made you think of Jungkook, even if you tried hard not to. 

There was always scenery you wanted him to marvel at with you, a meal you wanted to share with him, and an activity you wanted both of you to do together. They were thoughts you kept in a nook in your heart, storing them there at the risk of you breaking at how much you missed him, wishing he was still part of your life. But as you’d convinced yourself, and as was proven, there was a reason you both had to say goodbye.

“I’m pretty sure this won’t compare to there,” Jungkook pipes in, and much as you’d like to disagree that it would be a battle, looking at him being snug in his maroon hoodie, gazing at you then back at the mountains, you don’t want to argue. This is comfort you’ve missed dearly.

The day passes by slowly and quickly at the same time. You spend much of the afternoon fishing with Yoongi and Jin and riding the boat with Jungkook and Hoseok. The evening caps off with some karaoke in the living room, with most of your friends passing out from the alcohol and tiredness, leaving you and Jungkook to clean up the mess because as Yoongi exclaimed, he’d been so tired driving and cooking the whole day.

You and Jungkook wake your friends up and help them to their beds, then eventually pass out in your respective rooms.

The next day, you find out that the engaged pair actually had ulterior motives to the trip, as they reveal wanting your friend group to prepare a dance number during the wedding to entertain the guests. 

Everyone whined before being serious about it, with Taehyung taking charge of the production number and Hoseok giving ideas on the choreography, as he promises to be back here in time for the wedding. You join in on the fun, until the part where there’s a couple dance, leaving you and Jungkook as a pair because apparently, Yoongi and Jin have been bonding over fishing and have become inseparable themselves. 

It’s a little awkward at first, since the move that Namjoon and Da-eun are insisting on involves holding hands and twirling your partner.

“Oh, what the hell? It’s just a dance,” Jungkook states, taking your hand and spinning you around.

“Shit, I’m sorry. Was that too much?” He worriedly asks, as you lose your balance and fall into his chest because you hadn’t expected the move. 

You’re holding onto his sweatshirt as you giggle, and you look up at him with glassy eyes because you couldn’t stop laughing at Yoongi and Jin bickering because they couldn’t decide on who would spin and who would take the lead.

Jungkook laughs with you but turns you to him. “Are you okay? I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay, Kook. No harm done,” you smile, and both your eyes widen at the unexpected use of his nickname.

Suddenly, the laughing has stopped and all you can hear are cicadas and the rustling of the wind, only to realize that all your friends have their eyes set on you - your hands clutching on Jungkook while he holds your arms to keep you steady. 

Your cheeks warm at the feel of him holding you up, heart thumping at something that used to be so familiar, and you mask it with a smile and an invitation for a round of drinks. 

Your friends seem to have a plan in place as suddenly, the ones assigned to prepare dinner disappear to “get some rest,” prompting Yoongi and Jin to have you and Jungkook be on duty tonight. 

You go with the flow, knowing that you’re sober enough after chowing down some sweets, and wouldn’t be doing anything crazy with your ex-boyfriend as you try to feed your annoying friends.

“You can just prepare the rice inside, ___,” Jungkook instructs, as he heats the griller for the pork belly. “I can work on this.”

You quickly cook the rice good enough for 10 people and immediately return outside to where Jungkook is seasoning the meat.

“Here, I’ll help,” you say, as you grab a pair of tongs.

“What are you doing? You’re shit at grilling meat,” Jungkook exclaims.

“Excuse me?!” You scowl, placing your hands on your waist. “I’ll have you know I’m good with the barby.”

There’s silence before you and Jungkook burst in laughter, with him doubling over.

“Did you just use your Australian accent on me?” 

You warm in embarrassment. “It’s a usual line my sister says to her boyfriend and I tease her with it because she really does suck at it. It just came out.”

“God, that was hilarious,” he says, wiping his eyes from laughter. 

It’s not because of how you sounded but more of how unexpected and foreign it was; add to that, your stance made it look like you were genuinely offended.

“Hey, I really am,” you insist. “You could at least let me try.”

Your pout is too cute for Jungkook to reject you, so he steps aside and hands you the plate of raw meat. “Go ahead, mate.”

It’s your turn to laugh at his attempt at an accent, and you’re too preoccupied that you end up standing too close to the griller and with all the fat of the meat, the oil starts to pop, causing you to scream in fear.

“Oh my god, I’m dying!” You squeal, covering your face with your arm.

You feel Jungkook pull you away and grab the tong and plate from you, taking his position in front of you to make sure that the meat doesn't get burned. 

“Still good with the barby?” He teases.

“Shut up, I wasn’t prepared.” You pinch his arm as you peek from behind him. “You distracted me.”

“Excuse me, I didn’t do anything!” He laughs, prompting both of you to bicker as he continues to cook the meat and you find a rhythm where you cut into pieces the ones he’s done with. 

Not far away, all your friends are gathered in the dining area, sipping on their beers and watching the scene unfold, the smiles on their faces revealing what they’re feeling.

“You know what they say about past lovers remaining friends?” Yoongi asks.

“What?” is the collective response. 

“It’s either they never loved each other to begin with, or they still do. And we all know how much they loved each other, don’t we?”

**

“Shit,” Namjoon groans, massaging his head furiously. “My hangover is terrible.”

“Good thing you’re not driving,” Jin laughs from next to him, sipping on iced coffee. “And thank god that Da-eun isn’t some backward thinker who gives a shit that her fiance can’t drive to save a life.”

“Shut up, she thinks it’s cute.”

Jin and Jungkook laugh at his antics but gush at the silly smile painted on Namjoon’s face. For a songwriter, he’s not very expressive when it comes to love, but Da-eun had opened that part of him that revels in the emotion, in the experience of loving someone with their whole heart, something that he hates being thankful to Jungkook for. 

“Last night was pretty crazy,” Jin recalls, as he and Jimin lost a game and as punishment, had to jump in the freezing cold lake. 

“Yeah, for you,” Jungkook laughs. “Why must you open your mouth and make a bet out of everything? You always end up doing the consequence.”

“I like living my life on the edge, okay?” Jin retorts. “But I’d like to correct myself. Last night was crazy for us, because our boy Namjoon here was so drunk that he screamed about he couldn’t wait to fuck Da-eun senseless on their wedding night.”

The memory causes laughter among the men, except for Namjoon who buries his head in embarrassment. “Fuck, don’t remind me.”

“I should include that in my speech for you,” Jin teases, earning him a punch on the arm from his friend.

“But like you said, it was only crazy for us. Someone here had a bit of a romantic night, didn’t he?” Namjoon and Jin share smug looks as they turn to Jungkook. “How did you and ___ go from bickering over cooking meat to stargazing while we were all getting drunk?”

Jungkook rolls his eyes but smiles at the memory. Dinner was a long affair and quickly turned to drinking games, which you both joined in at the start. But you stopped early, assigning yourself as this afternoon’s driver, and didn’t want to have a hangover for it. 

Jungkook insisted that he didn’t want you to be the only responsible sober one so he retired from drinking early as well. Your friends had gotten drunk to the point of losing their filter when it came to teasing you both, so you separated from them and stayed at the dock by the lake, watching the stars instead. You knew they’d tease even more, but at least you and Jungkook weren’t around to hear them. 

“You guys were too loud, and plus, the sky was so pretty last night. You don’t see that in Seoul that much.”

“You guys were out there long. What did you guys talk about?” Jin inquires.

“Many things. I mean, it’s the first time that we didn’t have design stuff to discuss so we just talked about random stuff, like her design course, how my parents took the whole career change, and how life has been recently,” Jungkook smiles, thinking back to how natural it had been with you. 

He was enthralled with all your stories, his heart warming at all the things you got to do while you were away, the trips you made, the cuisines you got into, the weird stuff you’d seen and fun things you’d experienced. 

You seemed so happy with his stories, too, like when he put out his first video, his first client, the first time he got recommended, and all the projects he has in store. 

“We talked a bit about the breakup, too, how we both found it difficult to explain what happened to people who asked.”

“Was it awkward?” Namjoon wonders.

“Not really, I mean, we both agreed it was tricky. Like, how do you explain breaking up with someone you still loved? There was no fight, no breaking point, no ‘last straw.’ But deep down, we both knew it just had to happen,” Jungkook sighs. “If there’s anything I learned, it’s that sometimes the decision makes sense, even if the reasons don’t.”

“She seems really happy now,” Jin states. “Like, she really loved her time out there, and even here. We’ve talked a bit about her job and she still gets stressed but she seems to enjoy it, or at least, she’s not as bothered by the stress, I think. She’s not being consumed with work like she used to; even I noticed that from before.”

“Yeah, she said that, too. She found herself out there and it’s true, you know? You lose yourselves in the people you love,” Jungkook adds. “You guys know it wasn’t easy for us in the beginning, and I think that just took a toll on her at some point but held back because we loved each other. I think the breakup just led to her realizing what was out there, what she lost when she was with me.”

“Are you okay with that idea? That she lost herself as she loved you?” Namjoon asks.

“I guess. I found myself loving her because I didn’t know who I was when we got together; she did. Breaking up was a risk; it was either we’d realize it was a mistake or know we made the right call.”    

“Do you regret it?” Jin asks this time.

“Does it matter?” Jungkook sighs. “I think… we were at the point where we’d hurt each other regardless if we stayed together or broke up. It was just about whether we wanted to see the other break and then blame each other for it, or go through the pain on our own and spare the other of the blame.”

The three men settle with the silence as they contemplate on the words.

“Maybe you lasted long enough for it to hurt, but not enough for it to ruin you,” Namjoon says. “If you could stay friends after everything, talk about the breakup while maintaining that respect, and share the memories, I mean, that’s a pretty special kind of love, isn’t it?”

“We loved each other hard. I told you guys then that I knew it was coming, that she felt it wasn’t going anywhere, that it wasn’t working anymore. But she couldn’t do it, so I did it instead so she didn’t have to.” Jungkook lays back on the hammock he’s in as he thinks about that moment of the end. 

“There’s that thing I read somewhere, you gotta love someone in a way that they should feel free. She didn’t feel that way anymore; at some point, neither did I. And we had to let each other go, so that if we had a chance again, we could love each other right the next time.”

“Then why don’t you?”

Jungkook thinks about the sound of your laughter, the sparkle in your eyes, and the way your smile comforts him in ways he can’t describe. He thinks about how even now, you push him to be better, to believe in himself and what he’s capable of; how after all these years, your faith in him is still what makes him have faith in the world. You’re every bit the same woman he fell in love with a decade ago, yet you’re different, too. And there’s nothing about you he’ll change.

“I do,” he admits, the words coming out naturally, a declaration that he wasn’t ready to verbalize until this moment. “I just… don’t know about her.”

“Then why don’t you find out?” Jin wonders, as if it’s a question he can easily ask you. 

You’ve been responsive, open, welcoming when it comes to the friendship you both share, years after your relationship ended. But it may also mean that’s all you want this time around.

“I’m savoring it for now, being with her like this,” he says, as he briefly meets your gaze while you talk with your friends, prompting you to smile at him. “Her voice was the first thing I missed when she left; I���d like to hear it more in case I lose it again. And I’ll just keep doing what I have the past three years.”

“Which is?”

“Loving her from afar.”

**

It’s on a Sunday afternoon when Jungkook texts you that he’ll drop by your apartment to return the staging items you lent Taehyung after their company was once again featured in a magazine. You’d said that Saturday night would be okay but Jungkook drank with the guys and ended up sleeping over at Jin’s.

He stands by your door with a paper bag in hand, happy that he gets to have a reason to see you again. 

Things have been going well since the trip to the lake. He’s afraid to be deliberate in his intentions with you, so he, with the help of his friends, takes advantage when the opportunity presents itself. 

Like sitting next to you during the lunches that Namjoon and Da-eun invite you to, joining you on clean up duty during drinking sessions at Jin’s, agreeing with Taehyung to contact you to consult on some design aspects of their projects so you could meet up for coffee or at their office.

You two talk as friends do - you update each other about work, your families, something new you discovered, and you can talk about your past without bitterness or anger. There’s fondness in the memories, pride in what you’ve both accomplished, and faith that everything turned out as they should. 

Jungkook settles for this, as the fear of losing you again is greater than whatever desire he has to be anything more with you. 

He waits a while after he rings the doorbell, curious about the chattering and buzzing sound on the other side. It doesn’t sound like Jimin and Areum laughing or you and Yoongi bickering, and he’s trying to analyze who could be around when the door creaks open and he’s greeted by a familiar smile, one that’s always given him comfort - after yours, of course.

“Are my eyes betraying me?” The woman gasps. “Jungkook, my darling, is that really you?”

“Grandma!” Jungkook all but jumps at her. 

He lets himself be enveloped in her hug, as he whispers, “it’s me, and I’ve missed you so much, too.”

“Grandma!” You scold. “I told you I’d get the door.” 

You look up and your scowl turns into a look of shock. “Jungkook, hi. Uhm, I didn’t know you were coming,” you stammer.

“I thought it would be okay to drop by in the afternoon,” he bites his lips. “I… Well, I texted and I was really just gonna return these.” He hands the paper bag to you but your grandmother takes it then takes his hand.

“Come on inside, darling. We’re preparing dinner.” She pulls him inside your apartment and announces to the rest of your family. “Guess who’s here!”

The noise dies down as everyone turns to Jungkook. You could hear a pin drop as your parents and your younger sister, all wide-eyed and open-mouthed, look at you then at him, then they all break into smiles. They all hug him, leaving you shaking your head and giggling, as you watch Jungkook’s panicked look turn into one of longing and comfort.

Your family loved him. Though they’d voiced out some concerns at one point, given how they’d been a little impatient with how your relationship was progressing, they always knew how much he loved you. 

The rest of your family resume their responsibilities, with your father stepping out to grab a few things from the supermarket not far away. You’re hesitant to return to the kitchen to leave Jungkook with your grandmother but she gives you a reprimanding look.

“Go help your mother, sweetie. I’ll catch up with Jungkook. I’ve missed him so much and it’s been three very long years.”

You scrunch your eyebrows at her but also know that she’ll just nag you in the kitchen if she’s not entertained so you give in. “Fine but please, behave.”

Jungkook laughs and you excuse yourself, as you watch them settle on the couch and engage in conversation. 

It was all going so well. 

Jungkook always adored your grandmother because she’s amusingly blunt. He’d found himself in the middle of one of your arguments with her and he’d long figured out it happens because you’re so alike - you got your warmth from your mother but your passion and feistiness was definitely from your grandmother. 

He shares how life has been like, convincing his parents that law school just isn’t for him, and proudly talks about the company and how much you’ve helped, saying that you two have been catching up ever since you got back. 

“Oh, darling. You’re just as sweet as I remember,” she says, as Jungkook sits back down on the couch after he helped your mother reach for some things on your cupboard. You shared a quick laugh after that and your grandmother didn’t miss the way Jungkook’s smile softened at your look.

“When you two broke up, I kept thinking that it was temporary, that you’d both come around and realize it was a mistake,” she says. “But she left then I heard from her friends that you went back to be with your parents, too, and I was devastated. I mean, anyone would be a fool to not see how much you loved each other, and as her grandmother, that’s always meant so much, you know?” She smiles. “You looked at her the way her father looks at her mother. It was wonderful to witness.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t make her happy,” Jungkook croaks. It’s something that no longer makes him cry but hearing it from your own family hits different. “She’s talked a lot about her time in Melbourne and it really seemed like she found her happiness there.”

“Oh, she did,” your grandmother happily sighs. “She always had a reason to call home, just to tell us what she and her sister had done or gone to. And there was Sam, you know? He was such a blessing to her.”

Jungkook freezes and feels the life drain out of him. It seemed like an unwritten rule - do not talk about your exes with your exes; it was why Jungkook never did because, well, those he dated after you were more like flings than they were relationships. But hearing about someone making you happy when he couldn’t, about that man being a blessing to you when Jungkook stopped being one - it’s causing him a kind of pain he’d tried hard to no longer feel.

“I’m glad he was,” is all Jungkook manages to say. 

“Things don’t always turn out the way we want them to,” she continues. “But I truly believe that while people and dreams and needs change, great love doesn’t.” She looks at Jungkook with tender eyes. “Sometimes it takes temporarily losing it to remind us that we can’t, in fact, live without it.”

The heaviness he’s feeling lightens somehow, as he tries to think of this as your grandmother telepathically telling him something more. The moment is disrupted when your father returns and you announce that dinner is ready. 

Jungkook’s just about to excuse himself when your mother turns to him. “Stay. Have dinner with us.”

He doesn’t know what to make of it because who invites their daughter’s ex-boyfriend to dinner? But he thinks of how much he’s missed them, too, and that looking back, they’d become his family and he didn’t get to say goodbye.

“That would be nice,” he says, turning to you, who’s got a hopeful smile on your face. 

The dinner isn’t awkward, as he slightly worried it would be. There's much interest with his company, and he appreciates them not mentioning the breakup or your exes. They ask about his family, too. You laugh along at the conversation and Jungkook basks in this for a moment. 

He wonders if you laughed the same way with Sam, if he’s why the light in your smile and the sparkle in your eyes are back. He scoffs at himself at the feeling of jealousy, even if he doesn’t know much about the man and what you shared. 

Jungkook turns to you. 

You’re his great love and he knows what it’s like to lose you. Letting you go was the biggest risk, and he could only hope that since then, no one has taken that place of his in your life, too.

**

The restaurant is buzzing at this peak lunch hour as you settle in between Yoongi and Areum, catching Jungkook’s gaze in the process and you smile. You’d found out after he left your home after dinner with your family that your grandmother had told him about Sam, and you’d scolded her for doing so.

“Why hide it? You said you’re friends,” she shrugged. “Not unless there’s a reason you don’t want Jungkook to know that you loved a man after him. And why that even matters.”

You shook your head in disbelief then, thinking that talking about the man who came after your ex just felt weird. Jungkook never asked and it wasn’t information you offered. Sam was wonderful, would’ve given you the world if you let him, and maybe that’s why it hurt. 

Jungkook returns your smile and it’s a genuine one. You don’t want to assume that finding out about your ex had affected Jungkook but you missed his texts this whole week. You mentally scold yourself for even thinking this. Things are going well with him, and that was all you hoped after he walked out your door and out of your life. 

“Jungkook?” A high-pitched voice breaks into your thoughts. 

You look up to see a gorgeous-looking woman approach your table to where Jungkook is. Clad in a dress fit for a runway, she’s got a lovely face and aura about her that intimidates you quite a bit, even if she looks younger than you.

“Se-won, hey!” Jungkook stands up and the woman immediately wraps her arms around him, kissing him on the cheek then wiping the lipstick stain with her thumb. He looks rather shocked, as he turns to Namjoon and Jin with wide eyes and a worried smile.

They chat a bit, as the rest of your friends settle with awkward exchanges as you steal glances at the pair. From her body language, it’s easy to tell there’s history there.

“Yeah, I’m just having lunch with my friends. Joon’s getting married in a few weeks,” Jungkook says.

“Oh my goodness, that’s amazing!” Se-won shrieks. “I was always secretly jealous of you two. Congratulations!” 

“Thank you,” Namjoon smiles. “Back home for vacation?”

“Yes, a quick one. I just did a stopover before my fashion show in Tokyo,” she giggles. “I didn’t expect to run into you guys here, although honestly, I’ve been hoping I would.”

She smiles sweetly at Jungkook and suddenly you’ve lost your appetite. It wouldn’t be a surprise if Jungkook dated after the breakup since it’s something you did, too. You just didn’t think it would affect you this much.

“Well, it’s nice to see familiar faces,” she looks at everyone, and you try to not think much of the seeming familiarity between her and your own friends. “Well, most of them.”

“I’m—“

“She’s a friend who returned home a few months ago,” Jungkook interjects. 

“Oh? From where?”

“Australia,” you smile.

“Ugh, I miss it there! Melbourne is lovely but Sydney just felt more like me, you know?” She laughs. “But it’s still too chill and laid-back for me. And Seoul just sucks the life out of you but we all have reasons to come and go, right?” 

“We do,” you smile. 

As sudden as it was, leaving was one thing you never regretted. This place held too many memories and you felt like suffocating as each day passed. “But Seoul isn’t so bad.”

“I guess, if you spend time away from it,” she shrugs. “I always asked Kookie to leave with me, you know? Even just to go on a cruise in the Caribbean or to spend a week in Italy because I think he’d like that but he insisted on staying, never wanting to leave.”

You swallow the lump in your throat as you look up at her. “You seem to know each other well.”

“Well, it’s a pretty sweet story, actually.” She tucks her hair behind her ear. 

Jungkook’s “we don’t have to talk about it” gets drowned out by Se-won’s insistence and she excitedly gets on about their history.

“Really interesting how we met. So it was about two years ago and I was home for a break and this guy was riding his motorcycle out in the evening after - stupidly, I must say - having something to drink and I don’t know, maybe he was going too fast or it was too slippery or maybe he was a little tipsy—“

You focus on her voice while your eyes flit to your surroundings - all of your friends either have their heads down or their hands to their temples, trying to interrupt Se-won while Jungkook has his eyes closed and jaws clenched, probably not wanting to recall an incredibly irresponsible act.

“But anyway, he sideswipes a car that was in the middle of the road and ends up crashing on the ground after his motorcycle flips multiple times and oh my god,” she gasps, “the blood and everything.”

“You, uhm…” you say, after what feels like forever. Your heart is thrumming in your chest and just the image of Jungkook hurt and wounded is making you want to throw up. 

“You were at the hospital, too?” You ask, trying to make sense of where she fits into this.

“Oh, no. I was driving the car he sideswiped,” she says matter-of-factly, like it’s such a natural and casual thing to say about an accident.

“I stopped them from filing charges because he just looked, I don’t know, so helpless and miserable and so, so hot I mean, long hair, piercings, just this mysterious look on him and I just wanted to get to know him more, and I did. There was so much sweetness and kindness hiding behind all that sadness. I think he’d just come from a breakup?” She goes on, giggling and dragging her fingers on Jungkook’s arm. “But anyway, we hit it off and it was a whirlwind romance until I had to go back to Milan and he wanted to stay.”

“That’s quite the story,” you manage to say. “How long was he in the hospital for?” 

“A week or so, right Kookie? He had broken ribs and a broken whatever and it could’ve been so much worse but he survived. It’s how I met all his friends!” She says excitedly. “I stayed with him in his room everyday and they all came to visit. So it’s so nice to hear that Namjoon and Da-eun are engaged! How about you, Jimin and Areum? Any plans yet? It’s been so long!”

The chatter continues but you’ve completely zoned out. Your heart slows its pace until you’re unsure if it’s even still beating anymore. The accident, the injuries, your friends keeping this from you — everything feels surreal. 

It’s Se-won’s high-pitched goodbye that brings you out of the haze and you see her give Jungkook a goodbye kiss and you want nothing more than to sink into your couch and cry yourself to sleep. It’s a heavy feeling, knowing all this, how hurt and scared he was, how much worse it could’ve been, and how he’d carried the experience with him this whole time.

You clear your throat and avoid the looks of your friends. 

“I think I ate something bad,” you croak. “I’m not feeling too well, I’ll go ahead okay?”

You don’t bother to wait for a response and you hurriedly head to the door, wanting so badly to disappear as Jungkook runs after you and calls your name.

But you don’t turn back. You let the sound of his voice remind you that he’s still here, he’s alive, and that’s enough comfort. But for now, all you want to do is cry.

**

You turn your phone off after you send a reply to Areum’s dozens of messages. 

“Just give me some time. I’ll call when I’m ready,” is what you send, as you sink into your couch and bury your face on the pillow as you cry for the nth time today. 

You made yourself tea, took a long shower, tried to sleep…. But you almost dropped the cup, got burned by the hot water, and kept imagining a hurt Jungkook lying bloodied on the pavement, and you’d given up and just let yourself cry.

You let the noise from the TV drown out your thoughts, slowly calming you down as the tears have now dried up, when you hear a loud banging on your door. You close your eyes to drown that out.

“___, open the door, please,” Jungkook calls out, desperate voice just hoping you’d let him in. “Please. I need to know you’re okay.”

He repeats those words until you admit to yourself that he’s who you need right now, so you drag yourself to the door and open it to see him leaning on your doorframe, eyes glassy and chest heaving from all the effort of trying to get you to open up.

There’s a moment of silence as you look at his form - healthy, clean, alive. And he’s here with you, breathing the same air, living the life he’s always wanted. 

Then you break, your sobs spilling out and reverberating through the hallway, your throat hurting as it strains from your cries. Strong arms envelope you, as you bury yourself on his chest, your hands clutching on his sweatshirt, words unable to form.

You’ve missed him terribly, and you’ve never felt more comfort in the past years as you do right now, in his arms, as he whispers repeatedly in your ear. “It’s okay. I’m here, ____. I’m here.”

You both stand by your door as he constantly shifts you in his hold, tightening his hold then loosening it only to let you breathe, but he holds you as if to carry the pain and sadness with you. 

He feels your knees slightly buckle so he takes your face in his hands. “Let’s get you to the couch.”

Jungkook walks you there and sees your tear-stained pillow and blanket. He tells you to sit as he grabs you a glass of water to drink, watching you as the tears continue to fall down your cheek, his own cries aching to be heard as well.

You deny his offer of getting you dinner and he convinces you to get some rest, seeing your heaving body, tired from feeling all the emotions and dealing with them by yourself.

“You need to sleep,” he kneels in front of you, removing the damp strands of hair from your forehead and caressing the tears off your face. 

“I’ve been trying but I can’t.” Your voice cracks. “Don’t leave.”

“I’m not going anywhere, okay?” He says, kissing your hand softly like he did those years ago when you’d said your goodbyes but this time, it’s like a promise he’s making that whatever happens, he’s going to stay.

You lie down on the couch and leave him some space, prompting him to lay beside you with his left arm serving as your pillow, and his right your extra layer of warmth. You immediately sink into his hold, the fresh scent and comfort of his sweatshirt making you feel lighter by the second, as if he’s slowly taking from you whatever it is you’ve been keeping to yourself this whole time. 

Jungkook lets you cry some more as he pulls you closer, as close as he can have you, and he kisses your forehead, lingering, to remind you that he’s here, breathing next to you. 

“What happened out there, Kook?” 

“I just wanted to see you,” he says after some time. “I felt so lost when you left; I didn’t get to tell you everything I wanted to say. I wasn’t doing well at school so when my parents found out what happened, they had the guys bring me back home.”

He combs his fingers through your hair and caresses your arm as he tells you more - how his parents hoped they’d realized sooner that his heart just wasn’t in law, that he tried too hard for them and that he’d broken his own heart in the process. He shared how they helped him move on, let him stay busy by working at their friends’ hotel and tinkering on some motorcycle, reminded him everyday that he’ll figure things out soon, that they love him regardless, whatever he chose to pursue.

But that some days were still hard - not being there for Jin after he lost his grandfather, Jungkook having his sister spend time in their home after a 36-hour duty at the hospital to make sure her baby brother is alright, watching his mother smile through the other ladies make comments about her ambitionless son who just didn’t know what he was doing in life, knowing his father’s dreams of having a lawyer in the family not see the light of day. 

Then there was missing you, wishing he could just feel your touch, boop his nose then kiss it like he always liked, have you tell him that he’s good and worth something, no matter what he does.

He’d gone out for a drink during one particularly hard night. A bottle of beer and two shots, something that barely makes a dent in his system; it’s all he had. But he’d been sleepy, it had just rained, and the streetlight on the road was broken. 

And there was a stalled car in the middle of the road that he didn’t see.

He lost control and managed to avoid the tree up ahead, causing his motorcycle to slide then flip over, taking him with it. You’re so lucky, the doctor told him. We could’ve lost you, his sister cried. Broken ribs, burns and gashes on his arms, a concussion, a broken neck… It was a scary sight, but it looked worse than it really was. 

Se-won’s family is influential in Busan and she begged her parents not to file a case, as she hadn’t been hurt. Jungkook was ready for the consequences, knowing that it had been his fault, and he could’ve really hurt her. But Se-won insisted, letting him take his time to recover; helped him with the emotional part of healing, too. 

She was a stranger turned lover. She wasn’t someone he’d disappointed yet and he knew he never would, so he let himself bask in the infatuation, in the care, in the temporary bliss. Anything to remind himself of what he’d lost - himself. 

“Your friends drove down with Joon and Jin. I made them promise me not to tell you,” he croaks, feeling you cry again. “I didn’t want to give you a reason to come back because you’d been doing so well out there. I wanted you to be happy and you were.” He kisses your forehead. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, please,” you say, hugging him tighter. “I don’t want to think about that anymore. I’m just happy to know you’re safe.”

“I am,” he assures you. “That was probably the biggest mess up I ever did and it was enough to force me to really get my shit together, you know? Tae used to be that annoying kid at school and I’m glad he didn’t change.” Jungkook laughs, recalling how his friend would visit Jungkook at the hotel where he worked and pitch to him different business ideas. “We just needed a push and an investor who took a chance at us then things slowly fell into place.”

“I’m sure the guys are on your ass even more now, huh?”

“They let me sleep over even if I’d had just one bottle of beer,” he sighs. “But I’m glad they look out for me as much as they do. I don’t think I would’ve gotten through all of that without them.”

“I’m so sorry,” you desperately whisper in his ear. There’s so much to be sorry for but you know Jungkook wouldn’t wanna hear it.

“I don’t wanna hear it. That was all me, stupid and immature and selfish me.”

Your sniffles and hiccups fill the silence in the room as you trace his tattooed arm, feeling for the first time the rough parts of it that hid behind the blank ink.

“I didn’t want to be reminded of that night,” Jungkook says. “They’d healed but they were the most visible marks and I had to cover them up.”

Your fingers trace his chest, wondering if the marks there had healed, too, but you settle with listening to his beating heart and uttering the words you’ve been meaning to tell him, as he envelopes you in his warmth. 

“I’ve missed you so much, Kook. It was hard, too, when I was away, but I’m so happy you’re here.”

He affectionately boops your nose. I don’t want to be anywhere but here, he doesn’t say, but you return his smile and it’s all he needs to get him through another day.

**

The moment of seeing an important person in your life get married is truly special. That’s what you think as you watch Da-eun laugh one second then cry while Namjoon reads out his vows to her, assuring her a life and a partnership where she’s loved, respected, and incredibly happy. It’s amusing to see him be that emotional and open, hiding his face with every promise he makes and every ooh and ahh from the audience that’s gathered for this special event. 

They look beautiful and are clearly anticipating the life they’ll be sharing together, and you can’t help the skip of your heartbeat at the thought of how they’d met, taking to what Jungkook said that you can claim yourselves as the cause of their love story.

This wedding was months in the making and you’d spent it with the friends you’ve missed, including Jungkook who’d just constantly reminded and shown you why you’d spent seven years - and more - loving him. 

He’s familiar yet new at the same time. You realize that there’s layers of him that you’ve never seen before, like his sense of responsibility and maturity. He’s more open and expressive, and you find yourself being surprised at how natural he now is with words, how easily he captures people’s attention, and how much charm and confidence he exudes. But he’s still funny, goes with the flow, a little cocky, and incredibly caring and thoughtful, his best parts that got you to fall in love with him in the first place. 

He looks even more stunning tonight, in his beige three-piece suit and slick hair exposing his forehead. Jin said that Namjoon treated them to a facial yesterday so they could share in his wedding glow, and it’s definitely showing in Jungkook’s face, and you can’t help but admire even more the piercing on his eyebrow and how that oddly makes him look even more sophisticated.

The party is in full swing, as dinner had been served and you’d all just done your group dance number, which surprisingly enough, turned out better than you expected. You’d all spent some time practicing, making yourself get used to being so close to Jungkook again, with him gently holding your hand and carefully twirling you. He’d held you on your waist tonight when you almost lost your balance, given the heels you’re wearing and the two flutes of champagne you’d had.

“I got you,” he’d smiled, and you basked in the comfort that had always given you.

You haven’t talked much about it with your friends, as they always just wait for you to bring it up but you never know how to. While you’re not one to live with regrets, you can’t help but think sometimes that maybe you didn’t fight for your relationship enough, that you just got impatient, that you just expected and wanted too much, and that contrary to what he says, the fallout was because of you. 

But you also know that things needed fixing, and that thing was you. It’s hard to explain but you found something while you were away, as parts of yourself slowly came back the more you focused on you - your thoughts, feelings, needs, and wants that weren’t attached to another person. You needed to remember what that was like, so you could be your best self again for the next person willing to love whatever version of yourself you could give.

You know in your heart now that you want that to be Jungkook. But you’re incredibly scared of losing him as a friend this time, and you don’t know if you or he is willing to take that chance.

There’s some down time to socialize before the final part of the program, which is really just the speeches and toast to signal the start of the party. You’re with Yoongi and Hoseok at the table while Jimin and Areum are around, catching up with some old friends. 

Jungkook, on the other hand, is on his third washroom trip in the last 15 minutes, as the nerves of giving his speech kick in. He never enjoyed speaking in front of an audience, but Jin assured that they’ll give it as a pair, so Jungkook can just make them laugh and close it out if he wanted. 

A group of people are by the hallway, blocking his path to the washroom, but he notices Jimin and Areum and some familiar faces, too, like Hyunjin - a friend of yours from college whom Jungkook had seen in some of your social media photos, as she spent some time in Melbourne, too. 

Jungkook overhears her asking Jimin and Areum about when they plan to get married, prompting the two to say that they’re planning to go to the courthouse soon, but that the big celebration will have to wait until next year. 

“At least you’re sure and that’s one more wedding to go to after this,” Hyunjin says. “I mean, imagine if ___ just went ahead and married Sam when he asked her to, then all three of you would’ve been married by next year.”

Jungkook wants so badly to just have misheard what was said, but Areum asks how Hyunjin knew, as it wasn’t news that you openly shared, to which Hyunjin replied that, “Sam came to me after the breakup, after she said no to the proposal, and begged me to find a way to return the ring because he wanted her to keep it.”

“You’re the one who snuck it in their apartment?” Jimin asks. “We all believed he’d just left it there when he moved out of their place.”

Jungkook feels dizzy, as he learns more of your relationship with Sam. You lived together. You built a life together. You could be spending the rest of it with each other.

Hyunjin shrugs. “He didn’t get to, so he asked if i could, said something about wanting her to always remember that someone out there wants a forever with her. But he didn’t mean it in a bad way. You know Sam, he’s such a sweet person. Does she still have it?”

Areum nods. “In a box somewhere; it’s the only thing she kept from him.”

“Well, then I’d like to think she kept it to remind her of that. But he’s still holding out hope, you know? That she’ll change her mind and realize that he really could give her the life she’s always wanted,” Hyunjin continues. “I mean, they were together for a year and he knew right away he wanted to marry her. That’s some serious stuff, to love with so much certainty.”

Jungkook feels his heart drop and he quietly walks away, afraid he’d get any of your friend’s attention. Jin meets him in the hallway, tells him that they’ll be on in five minutes, and proceeds to shout to Jimin and Areum to come back inside.

“Hey, you okay?” Jin asks.

“I can’t lose her, Jin. I can’t not fight for her this time.”

Jungkook is met with a shocked look. “Where is this coming from, Kook?”

He shakes his head, not wanting to repeat what he’d heard. “She needs to know that I love her. She needs to know that I never stopped.”

**

You’re on your seat, anticipating the speech of the two men after your friends had done theirs. You’re trying to get Jungkook’s attention to wish him luck but he’s not meeting your gaze, his eyes focused elsewhere, and you think he’s just trying to calm his nerves.

Jin starts, the history and jokes about the friendship of the three making everyone laugh, but he wraps his part by saying that of all the things that this clumsy best friend had broken in his lifetime, the one thing he’d never broken and he’s sure that Namjoon never will is his promise to love Da-eun with all his heart.

Jungkook is given the mic and he takes a deep breath before he starts, then proceeds to say how he takes credit for his stupidity for why Namjoon and Da-eun met in the first place. He talks about just how whipped his best friend is, how he ends up being a blubbering mess when it comes to her, and how as Jungkook reflected on their love story, he got to reflect on his own. 

“You see, it hit Namjoon hard when I was in a bad place,” Jungkook says. “He took the train to Busan every weekend to see me, taking time away from being with Da-eun. But she let him, because she’s kind that way.” Jungkook smiles at her.

“The day she was gonna introduce him to his parents, to ask them to accept him, to give him a chance and ask for their blessing, was the day I got into an accident and she, uh,” Jungkook clears his throat, “she had no hesitation to let him leave because Joon needed to be a friend and she knew how important it was for him to be there for me.”

Jungkook bites his quivering lip and still refuses to look at you. 

“That… isn’t part of the script,” Yoongi hums. 

“How do you know?” You ask.

“Those two practiced their speeches with me.”

You turn back to the front where suddenly, Jungkook holds your gaze. 

“It sounds simple but Da-eun made that decision, no questions asked, to let Joon go because it was important for him and I always think about that, how Da-eun knew that she’d lose her family’s blessing and their support but it didn’t matter. Sometimes we make the hard decision because we need to, because we need to be something for someone, for ourselves, even at the cost of something else important.”

Jungkook looks around before he turns to you again.

“Her family’s not here. Who knows how different things would’ve been if Joon didn’t come to me, if he went to meet her family instead? But they both made that call and they dealt with the consequences, together. And I’ll always admire them for that strength and most of all, for their faith in each other and in their love that it would withstand anything. Because that’s what love is supposed to do, right? It forces you to make the hard decisions and you make them because you love the person you’re making them for. Even if it hurts, even if it causes you to lose something, even if it makes you doubt sometimes. And it’s that kind of great love that doesn’t go away, and I would be stupid to let it go the second time around.”

The tears fall from your eyes before you could stop them. You quickly wipe them away and sigh in relief to discover that you’re not the only one crying. 

“That was beautiful,” Hoseok says from next to you. “It almost felt like he knows how it feels to make hard decisions for the one you love. And I think so do you,” he smiles, an effort on his part to comfort you.

“I, uhm, I have to go,” you say, trembling, as you stand from your seat and quickly glance at Jungkook, who’s being pulled by his friends and the photographer, his colleague, for a photoshoot.

“Hey, don’t go through this alone again,” Yoongi calls from behind you.

“I’ll be okay, Yoon. Just tell Da-eun I needed to go. She’ll understand why.”

** You miss your floor twice and try to open the wrong hotel room thrice, mind hazy at what just happened. All you could think about was how Jungkook looked as he spoke to you, because that’s what he did. 

Love forces you to make the hard decisions and you make them because you love the person you’re making them for. He cracked at those words, and while you established years ago that you had to let each other go because of that love, it’s different hearing it now, especially as he says that he won’t let it go the second time around. 

You don’t even know why you left. You’d been filled with so much emotion at the sight of him uttering those words that you knew you’d lose it if you stayed. It’s why you’re here now, staring at your mascara-smudged face, at yet another crying session you’re doing by yourself.

You undress to get ready for a shower, deciding now that you’ll spend the rest of the night with a bottle of wine, and your friends can stay in your room once the party has finished.

There’s a knock on your door and you put on a robe, ready to scold your best friend who’d been trying to call you the entire walk to your room.

“Yoongi, I told you I’m fi—.” 

Your throat dries at the sight of a panting Jungkook, with his hair damp from running.

“Jungkook, what are you—”

“Why did you say no to Sam? Why did you reject his proposal?”

Your eyes widen at the question, but how he knew no longer matters. 

“And why do you still have the ring? Do you… do you still want him?”

You shake your head no.

“Then why keep it?” He croaks, and you see the nervousness in his eyes.

You turn away. “To remind myself that someone wanted a life with me, that he was sure he wanted to grow old with me. It’s silly but—”

“Then why did you say no? Why aren’t you back with him?”

“It wasn’t what I wanted,” you meet Jungkook’s eyes. “Because every time I thought of growing old, I couldn’t help but think of doing that with you. Even if it ended, even if we said goodbye.” You whimper. “I tried but I couldn’t imagine loving anyone else but you, Kook.”

“Is that still something you want? To be with me? To love me? To grow old with me?” 

“Yes,” you whisper, lips trembling at the thought of having that hope again.

Jungkook walks towards you and you stay still, letting the door shut, closing your eyes as you savor his soft touch on your skin.

He cups your face in his hands. “I want a life with you, ___. I always did. I just didn’t know what that looked like. I know we had our reasons but I should’ve fought for you and I didn’t know what I could promise you, or how else to make you happy because I wasn’t happy myself; I wasn’t happy with myself.”

You let the words linger, listening to his fears and worries then.

“Are you happy now?” You look at his glassy eyes that mirror yours.

“Yes. Even more with you. Are you?”

You nod vigorously, as he chases your tears with his thumbs. 

You bask in the feel of his lips on your forehead, your breath hitching as he moves further south. You wrap your arms around his waist as he kisses your nose, then your salty cheeks, then finally, your lips.

He’s warm and soft, and you feel the gentleness of the act, savoring this just as you are, and you sigh into the kiss, as if saying, finally, you’re here. Again. And I'm not letting you go.

It turns deep soon enough as you try to taste more of each other, tongues dancing, hands exploring, bodies moving together, as one. You lean on the desk as he untangles your robe, his eyes boring into yours. He slowly undresses you, his breath hitching at the sight of you bare, like he’d seen so many times before, and that’s haunted him since you left.

He takes his time kissing all parts of you that he’s missed - your neck, your shoulders, your breasts, then down to your torso, your hips, your hands in between, your thighs, and finally, your cunt, the evidence of his effect on you reminding him that not much has changed. He kisses softly and he licks, eliciting sounds that he’d only dreamed of hearing again. 

He settles at your center, but you take his cheeks in your hands, motioning for him to look at you.

“I want to focus on us, Kook. Please, let me feel you.”

He stands up and he lets you help in undressing him. First the coat, then the vest, then the bowtie. It’s slow and teasing, but you whine and he picks up the pace, unbuttoning his polo while you work on his trousers, feeling the dent underneath as you unzip him. You take his hardened length in your hand and he moans at the feel, taking his forehead into yours and sneaking another kiss. 

You giggle as he pulls you by the waist and walks you backward to the bed where he lays you down, gently, and there are no words needed to know how you both want this to happen tonight. 

You kiss as he pins your arms above your head, as he eases himself inside you, as you both moan at the pleasure, as he thrusts into you - steadily, with purpose, carrying with it all the words he didn’t say, and all the words that he will, because he has a lifetime to do that.

You focus on each other and it’s a long buildup to reach the peak but it’s how you want it - feeling each other, remembering each other, savoring each other. He comes and he works on your clit, making you come not long after and he turns you to the side to face him, wiping your tears and booping your nose repeatedly until it ends up with another kiss.

And it’s that familiarity, that emotion and sincerity that you missed. It’s that certainty - that there are no other lips you want to kiss, no other name you want to moan in between tangled limbs and damp sheets, no other eyes you want to stare into before and after the high, no other hands you want mapping your body, and no other body you want to mark yourself into.

“I love you, in case you didn’t know,” he smiles.

“I love you, in case you didn’t know,” you giggle.

You stay there, listening to each other breathe. You trace the black ink on his arm that runs up to his shoulder, finding unsuspecting things tucked in the crevices of the elaborate artwork. There’s a dandelion, a turtle, a kite, a paper airplane. 

“Something reminds me of you and I get it tattooed,” he whispers. “The rest of it was meant to hide my pain but these, these are the best parts of me, ____. I never wanted to forget.”

You bury yourself in his hold, pulling him closer and closer, and you fall asleep like this, knowing that this is how you want the rest of your life to be.

**

It’s the next morning in the middle of your warm shower, with his arms around your waist that he turns you around.

“I was thinking,” he starts, rinsing the shampoo off your head.

“Hmm?”

“I know it’s a years-long delay but… what do you think about moving in together?”

Once his question registers, you pull him for a long and deep kiss, pinning him against the wall as you travel down his neck.

“I’m guessing that’s a yes?” He chuckles.

“A million ones,” you smile.

##

masterlist

  - Permanent taglist: @sherlynxx

[dreamcatcherrs]

what makes them blush; mcyt x reader

+ fluff hours!

dream:

it's pretty hard to make him blush - even if you were the biggest flirt, you wouldn't be able to make him blush

he blushes the easiest by losing in a game or thinking about you in a *cough* not so family-friendly way

george:

george blushes easily, I think we'd all be able to guess that

small touches or gestures are the things that make him blush the most, though

like giving him food during a stream because he forgot to eat

sapnap:

sapnap blushes easily depending on how far into the relationship you are

the first month he blushes at literally everything - after 6 it's not so bad anymore

he blushes easily at physical touch when you're the one initiating it

badboyhalo:

bad isn't the one who is easiest to get to blush, despite what you'd think

when you get really flirty and touchy with him, though, he gets very blushy

he might flirt easily with you when it's as a joke, but when it gets serious, he's all blush and stutters

technoblade:

he's a pretty easy blusher, he's just very very good at hiding it from you

but trust me, when you run your fingers along his arm or twirl them around in his hair, he is burning up from the inside

good luck getting him to admit he's ever blushed before, though

wilbur soot:

like dream, I don't think it's easy to make wilbur blush just by flirting or using your words, but rather whenever he does something himself that reminds him of how in deep he is with you

getting caught up in just looking at you, for so long that he loses focus on the rest of the world makes him blush hard

jschlatt:

schlatt would seem like the hardest one to get to blush, but he actually isn't

it's pretty simple - he pushes love and affection away, but when it's impossible to avoid, he has no other choice

tell this man that you love him and throw all of your love and affection in his face, he'll be blushing in no time

corpse husband:

it can be easy to make him blush, surprisingly

compliments and praises - like saying how hard-working he is, or complimenting his appearance - is something that can make him very flustered

he knows that no matter how many times he denies it, you'll keep telling him that, and he'll continue to blush every time

karl jacobs:

we all know it's easy to make this man blush, especially when it's you

it's kinda hard to explain, but whenever he gets the feeling and realisation of how much he loves you - that's what makes him blush

like seeing you in his hoodie or doing something that he finds adorable will get him excited and blushy in no time

skeppy:

it is a piece of cake to get him to blush

all you have to do is literally just love him, and he'll be blushing💀

and he literally hates it because everyone teases him for it - even you

fundy:

getting fundy to blush literally just depends on his mood

he could wake up feeling super confident and just tease the shit out of you the whole day

or he could just be sitting there and just looking at you would make him blush

quackity:

alex is another pretty easy target, but he puts up a good fight

because most of the time he'd be the one trying to make you blush, definitely by using his jokes!

but when you're being very straight-forward with what you want and putting how much you love him into words, his face is RED

punz:

almost impossible, only because he is so cocky and confident that he can make you flustered just by existing and I mean is he wrong

I can't really see what would make him blush? only that he'd be taken aback if you didn't blush at all by all of his teasing, but that's all, really

awesamdude:

it's a back and forth kinda thing - one day he's making you blush, the next you're making him blush, etc.

he can get a little shy around you sometimes, and that's when you should try to make your move

flirt with him, touch him, call him sweet names - he will be a blushing mess

slimecicle:

it's hard to get him to blush - you have to try really hard if you want to succeed, is all I can say

he's usually the one making others blush, not the other way around

but, if you wanna give it a try, he is an easy target when in the middle of deep conversations past midnight - hit him with that poetry-type shit and there's a chance he might blush

eret:

the day you catch eret blushing is… well, never

it's damn near impossible to get him to blush

with that flirting demeanour he has and that deep ass voice? honey, he knows there's no chance you'll even try to make him blush

and if you did, he'd just laugh it off and tease you back for trying to get him to blush, but failing

foolish:

you can never tell when this man is blushing, cause he literally always covers it up with giggles

he laughs whenever he feels flustered and that's usually enough to cover it up, so it's great for his advantage

what gets him is receiving a lot of praise and being spoiled a lot with gifts

jack manifold:

he doesn't blush from a lot of things, but there is one easy thing you can do to get him to blush

and that is simply just flirting with him

he'll start feeling more and more flustered the longer you keep it going, and it's something he's gonna hate being teased for later

tommy:

BIG MAN NEVER BLUSHES

nah, jk, it's easy to make him blush - that is if you're a very blunt person and can go to extreme lengths to tease him

then you'll have him flustered and speechless in no time, as crazy as that sounds

tubbo:

it's pretty easy to make tubbo blush despite the amount of times we've seen him flirt with ranboo👀

and that's because he's pretty shy with the whole "being in a relationship" thing, though don't get me wrong, he'd still flirt with you

doing kind, crafty things for him, like making a flower crown for him, specifically with a flower he said he liked once - that makes him blush

ranboo:

ranboo can have his moments where it's easy for him to blush, but he's pretty good at talking/teasing back with you, so it's not super common

he blushes easily at any form of physical contact, especially when in a new relationship or only in the "crush" stages

____________________________________

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[lavishedinjimin]

Hi! First off...I love your work! .Anyways..I wanted to request a scenario where WEREWOLFdom!tae or WEREWOLFdom!jk asking s/o to run because he cant control himself as she disobeyed him.. But, he loses it and catches her...

Would love it if you could do this!! I love your work sososososo much!!

this prompt oml save my soul

decided to use taehyung x OC :))

warnings: possessive tae, also angry tae oh no, slight humiliation

~

"Didn't I tell you to stay the fuck away from him?" Taehyung snarls, walking up to you with anger written all across his prominent face. His eyebrows furrow intently, making sure that he was upset and angered.

"It's not my fault!" you try to defend yourself, backup up away from him, "He... he talked to me first! He was a part of your pack, Taehyung. I couldn't do anything!"

"You could've told him to go fuck himself instead." Taehyung crosses his arms, looking down at you with malice.

You feel small and defenseless, cornered against a wall. You bite your lip in utter fear, this being the first time he was genuinely mad at you.

"You know how he's like. He's a motherfucker who wants everything, including you. That's why I told you to stay away from him, right? But of course, you had to be disobedient. For what? Huh?" Taehyung lifts his hands up and rests them between your head, trapping you with his arms. "You want to prove something to me, little one? You want to prove that you're an independent woman who can do whatever she wants? Is that it? Or are you just certifying how disobedient you can be?"

Your eyes expand, "Taehyung, no! Absolutely not."

He grits his teeth, unconsciously showing you his sharp canines. "Then what the fucks your reason, hm?"

You did not like the way he was talking to you. Although your heart was racing in nervousness and fear, it wasn't your fault that he's vastly the jealous type.

You decide to speak up, "Stop being so jealous all the time! I don't have anything to do with him!" You push his chest, but he doesn't budge, "I know my boundaries, Taehyung!"

Taehyung was baffled. He looks at the floor with a smirk, mouth agape. He takes a step back, then gazes back at you with his head slightly tilted down. "You know I'm territorial, Y/n. That's the first fucking thing I said about myself when we first met."

Taehyung groans loudly and runs both hands through his hair while turning around. He walks away from you, rubbing the back of his neck as he mutters something under his breath.

You didn't quite catch what it was, making him repeat himself. He completely loses all control.

"I said," he turns around, eyes now gold, "fucking run!"

Within a heartbeat, you did not hesitate to run as the sight of him startles you. Nothing else occupied your mind but to run, move your legs as fast as you can, and run away from your boyfriend.

You fight back the tears that were trying to escape. You have never seen him like this before. Angry to the point that he asked you to stay away from him. Your body feels heavy and your feet try their best to run, and run, and run.

Your shoes rustle against the fallen leaves, your legs pushing you deeper into the woods.

Deciding to stop your tracks to catch your breath, you sink down onto your knees.

If only you can change back time.

Suddenly, two hands grab a hold of your shoulders, causing you to jump. Turning around in lightspeed to see who it was, you fall to your back when Taehyung pounces on you.

He pins your body down, lips attaching themselves to your neck. You didn't get to process what he was doing for everything was happening so fast.

"Stop. Being. A. Disobedient. Brat." He says in between kisses. Taehyung finds your sweet spot right below your ear and licks it, biting the skin right after. You let out a quiet whimper, shutting your eyes.

"You belong to me. I own you. Get it?" He continues to bite down on your skin, leaving marks all over your neck. The stinging only drives you crazy, already used to him bruising you up like this. "I'm gonna fuck you so good in these woods so that every time they go to this place, everyone will smell our scent together. They'll know you're mine, and mine only."

He travels his hand down to your pants, cupping your crotch firmly. You gasp, looking deep into his golden irises. "My territory."

[whatifyoulivelikethat]

LO$ER=?, m | jjk

pairing(s): jungkook x reader

summary: Life is just a path and you walk it. Until Jeon Jungkook. He made you run, sprinting through winding side roads and alleys, fighting, bleeding, losing. Your paths split, but life is made of orbits. Now that they have overlapped once more, his hand is fiercely holding yours and he won't let go again. Nothing matters if he's with you. Thus, you run once more, laughing like you've gone mad.

continuation of 0X1=?, m | jjk – click here to read

warnings: rated M (18+) for language; mentions of sexual assault (not heavily described, however, please note reader is the victim of said assault); actually predominantly fluff; mentions of previous angst; mentions of physical fighting; smut (fem reader, fingering, cowgirl, scratching / marking, penetrative sex); non-idol!BTS - tattooed, previously rich!Jungkook x rebellious!reader (mostly reader's POV, a tiny bit of JK's POV), ft cameo of Kim Taehyung as JK’s best friend and crossover with 'bao, t/m | myg' au

yes, I waited until the TXT's 'LO$ER=LO♡ER' was released to write this XD there's a ton of TXT references as well, enjoy!

--

now playing – LO$ER=LO♡ER by txt

"Jeon Jungkook! Yah! Jeon Jungkook! Come out of that whore's home!"

You were about to remove the groceries from your front seat, but then you stopped at the shouting, peering up at the second story of the apartment complex to see… ah, yes, a young woman yelling at your front doorstep. One look at the imported, Western, black car with heavily tinted windows and you were well aware that the woman in a matching designer two-piece – a ruffled pink suit jacket and flared skirt – complete with immaculately pulled back hair in a half-ponytail must be...

She turned around, fuming, pretty features twisted in rage, and screamed in frustration.

You quickly jerked your head back out of her line of sight and clicked your tongue.

Your boyfriend's ex-fiancé had some lungs on her.

You waited until she finished shrieking like a banshee and peered out to see her spin on her heel and return to pounding on your apartment door with her small, manicured fists. You spotted her beige, black cap-toed slender heels.

Chanel.

Huh.

You stayed in your car.

Reached over to your bag and pulled out the single ice cream you bought to share with Jungkook but, at this rate, you would have to buy another. You pulled off the cap and folded it in half, curving it like a spoon, and began to eat the mango sorbet. Hm, well, it was better this way. Jungkook would probably prefer chocolate or straight up diabetes over mango sorbet.

He would eat pretty much anything though.

You scooped up some of the frigid, melting sweet into your mouth and watched his ex-fiancé shout at no one.

True, you could go up there and throw her down the stairs. But there was something hilarious about this, her beating and howling at your apartment door, completely ignoring the fact that no one was answering it and that she was very clearly causing a public disturbance, all because of her own personal problem.

You glanced up to watch her slide down the door, openly crying now. You pressed the button of your car window to roll it down a crack to listen to her sobbing above you.

"–can't believe you would do this to me... you know I need this marriage... my family's company depends on it..."

You slowed, licking off your makeshift spoon.

"I'll be left with nothing... nothing unless I get married..."

Crocodile tears or not, the woes of the rich did not earn much sympathy with you.

You rolled your window back up, leaving your car on idle for the air conditioning.

It was a mix of previously being constantly berated by Jungkook's wealthy parents that now exiled him over a fucking eyebrow piercing and being a member of the working, lower middle class. For some reason, that latter fact was also offensive to Jungkook’s parents. Everyone was accepting until money got involved. You hummed, eating another scoop. You didn’t like it, but you understood that his parents wouldn’t believe that you have no interest in their money. What you didn't understand was why his ex-fiancé was so hellbent on yelling at your door. From what you could tell, she wasn't ugly. Couldn't she find someone else?

You scraped the last of your small ice cream out and ate it up.

You checked your phone.

Jungkook wouldn't be out of work for at least another three hours. You had found him a job at the local bao shop through your own job as an accountant. You assisted the family in sorting the finances for their small business and personal tax forms. The owner had back surgery and so the daughter had been working there by herself with one other employee that delivered the orders. They wanted to hire another to help with cooking and cleaning, perhaps even open up the front counter again to accept pick-up orders instead of only delivery. However, it was hard to find someone trustworthy and reliable. The best way was through word of mouth.

They won't mind my tattoos?

Whenever I drop by, the delivery guy is wearing a leather jacket, ripped jeans, and has a resting bitch face. You'll be fine. Also, I think the daughter and him are dating.

Jungkook had blinked at you.

You know. In case they disappear for ten minutes, unexplained.

You loved Jungkook's laugh.

He didn't complain or whine for some other job. He only asked when he started and how to get there. You bought him a secondhand bicycle and he was off to work, five to six days a week. Sometimes you would drop him off with your car if was too rainy. Occasionally, when he had to stay late for a large order, the delivery guy would drive Jungkook and his bike back home.

That's how it was here, in the world of everyone else, minus the rich.

The fuck is all this?

Manager gave me a bunch of leftovers. She said I'm a fast learner. Did you know Taehyung stops by there? He's never said shit! He said it was his little secret, that ass–

You smiled as you remembered Jungkook's animated face and annoyance at his best friend for not sharing what he thought was crucial information. Jungkook would speak excitedly, hauling a bag of buns and spilling them over your clean kitchen counter, scrambling to catch them as he explained the different ones to you and how they were made, telling you all the things he was learning and funny stories about customers.

You almost forgot this Jungkook.

It was strange, feeling something after such a long time of feeling nothing, strange to find your time occupied once again by him, when at many times you vowed not to get involved with Jungkook anymore, only for him to show up and make you throw your promises to yourself to the wind, recklessly chasing the anger, wondering, hating, loathing how much you still loved him after he left, recalling him standing there, stone silent as his parents' verbal lashes ripped you to shreds.

You turned the car off, pulling the keys out and pocketing them, not wanting to the drain the battery.

Maybe.

Maybe you were stupid for loving him so much.

Maybe you were as pathetic as the woman up there in some ways.

Then again.

Maybe that was just how everyone lived.

You heard a soft tap by your car window.

You jerked your head to see Jeon Jungkook, in the flesh, peering at you through the glass, clutching his bike. You could see half of his head, short black hair and large, curious brown eyes, nose pressed up to the bottom of your car window. He was wearing his work clothes, light wash jeans and an aqua blue t-shirt, lightly dusted in flour. He pointed up and you noticed his ex-fiancé had switched back to yelling at the door, no longer facing the street.

You shooed him back and opened the car door, eyes wide.

"Why are you home?" you whispered, crouching down to speak to him.

He grabbed your hand, gasping as he gripped it. You shivered at the coldness of his fingers, but there was a warmth in between your and his frozen palms, melting each other.

"Oh, shit, your hand is so cold!"

"So is yours!"

"I was biking! My hands get cold from the wind. What's your excuse?"

You held up the empty mango sorbet container in your other hand, shifting your eyes guiltily.

"And you didn't share?!" Jungkook hissed, his windswept hair giving him a fierce appearance, dismay clear in his glistening dark brown orbs despite trying to sound angry.

You spied his other hand on his bike. There was a large, wrapped bandage on his left forearm. You ticked your chin towards it, furrowing your brows. "What happened?"

"Ack, I burned myself and manager-nim told me to go home early. I told her I could still work, but there were only a few hours left and it seemed like she wanted to be alone with Yoongi-hyung..."

You raised your eyebrows.

"What are they gonna do, bonk in the kitchen?"

"You wouldn't want to bonk me in the kitchen?"

You grinned at him and Jungkook grinned back, eyebrow piercing flashing in the sun.

"JEON JUNGKOOK!"

"Oh shit–"

You scrambled out of your car, locking it, slamming the door as the young woman wailed his name and pointed at you and him, furiously wiping her tears.

"You bitch! How dare you take him from me! He was mine! I had him wrapped around my finger!" She hiked up her skirt and swiftly power-walked to the stairs, looking back to yell more at you as Jungkook placed his bicycle down. "He would do anything for me!"

You raised your eyebrows, again.

Jungkook yanked on your t-shirt sleeve, ushering you to get on the bike with him.

"Doesn't seem like it!" you called back casually, chucking your trash at her, causing the empty ice cream container to smack her in the shoulder and roll across the sidewalk.

"You–"

You cackled and got on the bike, hooking your arms around Jungkook's shoulders and adjusting your feet as she stomped up to you two, conventionally attractive features contorted in rage.

"He was my dog!"

Your eye twitched.

"You were gonna marry a freak who was into bestiality? No wonder you left," you remarked, patting him on the chest as Jungkook burst out laughing, loud and rich, shaking his head.

"You can't do this to me, Jungkook! You can't leave me with that other guy!"

You felt it.

Pause.

You felt Jungkook stiffen under your hands and you turned yourself, hearing the helpless plea in her voice now, throwing herself to the ground, designer knees in common dirt, anguish on her face, tears streaming down her made-up cheeks, sniffling hard, and, with your breath lodged in your throat, you realized she was restraining her pained sobs, so trained in maintaining appearances that it seemed like she couldn’t even cry properly in front of others.

"You can't... you know how they are... I can't marry him, you saw what kind of man he is... that's the whole reason I tried to find another husband..."

There was no more anger in her voice, only fear and dread, and you didn't understand, and yet you could for some reason, for some reason you could see it as if it was tangible, the realness in her enigmatic words. Jungkook's hands tightened on the handlebars of the bicycle, his knuckles turning white, tense shoulders under your arms, and for a second, a moment, an instant...

You thought he might go back.

"You should run."

The crying woman on the ground lifted her head, hiccupping, cheeks blotchy pink, still somehow beautiful.

"W-What?"

Jungkook turned his head and looked down at her. "You should run away, like I did. Find someone who actually loves you. Getting married to me will only make both of us miserable, even if it saves you from that other guy."

She looked from you to him, and you recognized that look in her eyes, jealousy and envy, but not directed at you. It was directed at the warmth between the coldness of his hands and yours, directed at the orbits of his and yours finally overlapping, meeting in the vastness of space once more, his zero and your zero becoming one, not you, but his ability to throw everything away, his wealth, his comfort, the world he knew, all for a feeling she had yet to feel.

"What... what if I can't?" she asked weakly. "What if I can't find what you have?"

Jungkook lifted his foot off the asphalt and placed it on the pedal. He raised his head, and you found his eyes on yours for a brief moment before casting them back down to his ex-fiancé.

"Then keep running. It's better than being married to him, right?"

He began to turn the handles, about to pedal away.

She screamed after him, words choked with agony.

"Love won't solve our problems, Jungkook!"

You held on tight, chest to his back, fingers clutching in Jungkook's shirt, nose in his hair, his warmth under your cold hands.

"It won't!" he yelled over his shoulder, gaining speed with a grin. "But it sure as hell makes the problems worth shouldering!"

-

“Hey! Get back here!”

You snickered and chucked the plastic bag into the basket connected to the bicycle, jumping on quickly, pedaling away as Jungkook ran after you at top speed, breathless and laughing, his black hair flying back, aqua shirt molding to his muscular chest, long legs sprinting after you and the bike, your grinning face looking back periodically to catch his smile, going not too fast, but still fast enough so he couldn’t quite catch up. Golden hour brought out the tan on his skin and his high cheekbones, both of you tearing out of the gas station at high speed, drawing stares and shaking heads, but neither of you noticed or cared, his booming voice calling your name and you sticking your tongue out at him childishly.

“Watch out!”

You jerked aside and sped past a group of five young men with skateboards, two with shorter black hair, one with long black hair and white highlights, one with ash gray hair, and one platinum blond, all very tall, but you didn’t have time to stop and stare at the impressive height of them, turning into a side alley towards to the creek nearby, avoiding pedestrians, Jungkook following close behind until you got to your destination, grabbing the plastic bag in the basket and throwing the bike down, cackling as Jungkook snatched you from the air, his heart racing against your back as you kicked the air, him still somehow effortlessly carrying you despite sprinting so hard, panting into your hair.

“Get off!”

But instead of letting you go, Jungkook held on tighter, fierce kisses into your neck, wiping his sweat all over you and making you cringe amidst your laughter. It was already late, the sun dipping into the horizon, slowly taking its warmth with it. Water trickled meekly down the creek, barely coating the rock bottom due to the hot summer.

“Stop, stop, the ice cream is melting,” you finally gasped out, shoving Jungkook aside, wiping your neck with the back of your hand, pretending to be disgusted, but Jungkook just grinned and seized your cheeks, pressing his lips against yours.

“I love you,” he breathed.

“Ack, I love you too, fuck, get off–”

-

You two sat on the swings of the empty playground, watching the sun disappear, eating ice cream with the lids of the containers. As predicted, Jungkook got the chocolate that seemed to have everything in it but the kitchen sink. You, on the other hand, got red bean this time.

“Hey, Jungkook.”

“Hm?”

He looked up from his ice cream, shoving a large lidful into his mouth.

It was strange how beautiful he looked, even with his black hair sticking up every which way, his cheeks filled with the frozen sweet, the faint rays of sunlight catching the silver of his jewelry – eyebrow piercing, earrings, silver chain around his neck with the compass star pendant – all paired with his oversized aqua blue t-shirt and baggy jeans, still with bits of flour on his thighs from work.

“What did that man do to her?”

A darkness clouded his features even though he tried to hide it from you with a neutral expression.

“Ah… He just… Just wasn’t really the kind of guy who thought of women as people,” Jungkook finally got out, looking away from you. “You know, the kind of guy you really hate.”

“That’s you,” you joked.

“I know I can’t do anything,” Jungkook continued, ignoring your quip and you suddenly regretted it, seeing the way he lowered his hands, exhaling slowly. “I am not responsible for anyone else’s behavior but my own.”

Come crawling back to me on your knees when she reaffirms to you that I'll be the best fuck you'll ever have.

She'll never make you feel as good as I can make you feel.

Enjoy your piranha.

“I’m sorry.”

Jungkook looked up at your sudden declaration.

“I’m sorry,” you repeated, coughing awkwardly. “I’m sorry for saying the things I said about her.”

He snorted, shaking his head. “Don’t be. Just because she was in a shit situation doesn’t excuse her for being a shit person.” He shoved the lid into the empty ice cream container and rubbed the back of his neck, pushing his hair back with a sigh. “Just like how it doesn’t excuse me from being a shit person for what I did to you.”

His eyes shifted away.

“You don’t have to–”

“Yeah, I do,” he muttered, cutting you off. “I’m a fucking loser.”

The streetlights began to turn on, but no one was in a place like this, two adults in a place for kids, stuck wondering what adulthood was supposed to feel like because it still felt like an endless cycle of forever learning and forever running, wandering to find out what the finish line meant.

“I wasted time you can’t get back and I will spend the rest of my life chasing the time I wasted.”

Jungkook sucked in a shuddering breath, hand falling from his hair, rueful smile on his face.

“I can only hope you can put up with me for so long.”

You blinked slowly.

He turned his head, brown eyes finding yours, those irises catching the streetlights like how his jewelry had caught the sun, proving that Jeon Jungkook was, indeed, already adorned with nature’s very own jewelry.

You scooped out the last of your red bean ice cream and ate it, looking away from him.

“Sounds like forever,” you remarked, feeling the chilled sweet cool your heated cheeks, swallowing slowly, savoring the way the cold warmed you in its own way.

“Hm?”

“Sounds like I’m stuck with you forever then,” you said, turning back to him with a smirk. “Kinda sucks.”

He smirked back, cocking an eyebrow. “Yeah. Major suck. Speaking of my dick–”

“Oh, shut up.”

But you said it with a smile and he knew you didn’t mean it.

-

“Why the fuck do you have that?”

“It’s from work. Gimmie your arm.”

“Why?”

You extended your arm, frowning, stopping under the streetlight, one hand on the bike as Jungkook held the black permanent marker with his right hand. He used two fingers to uncap it and tucked the lid neatly into his palm, spinning the marker with the adjacent two fingers to readjust it so that he could write on your arm.

“Do you wanna get a tattoo with me?”

“Of what?”

You looked down to him scribbling on your skin, his own black tattoos standing out, covering his entire right arm and up to his shoulder. You wondered if he would end up tattooing his back and maybe his other arm – but, then again, he kind of needed money to have pay for such large pieces.

“Couples tattoo.”

You looked down when he drew back, grinning, reading the word upside down.

LO♡ER

You raised an eyebrow.

“You want to get ‘lover’ tattooed?” you asked, skeptical, turning your arm this way and that, unsure if you liked the placement on your forearm, near your wrist. “You don’t have any space on your right arm anyway.”

“That’s why I would get it on my left.”

And he curved his wrist to write on the bandage on his left forearm, messily writing on top of it.

LO$ER

Now you raised both eyebrows.

“You want to get… ‘loser’ tattooed onto your body?” you snorted disbelievingly.

Jungkook grinned, recapping the black marker with one hand, tapping the dollar sign on the bandage with the marker lid. “Doesn’t it describe me? ‘Cause I had money, and now I don’t.” He pointed to the heart on your skin. “You love me. I love you. A lover with a dollar sign is a loser, right?”

Laughter and skateboards sped past, five blurs of black along the street, spinning around the parked cars, people yelling after them to stop being so reckless, but you were too busy staring at Jungkook to notice the ruckus, too busy staring at that smile and those brown orbs lit up by streetlights.

“Are you stupid?”

Jungkook’s grin widened, mole underneath clearly visible. “Yeah, kind of. Stupidly in love with you.”

You both instantly pretended to gag, trying to mask your smiles, you shoving him and him shoving back, playful and laughing like mad, falling into him, dropping the bike with a loud clang, swept up in his arms and his kiss, your hands hooking behind his neck, love you, love you, love you, not sure about this whole tattoo idea, but, hell, maybe, just maybe if he annoyed you enough about it.

-

Shit, the groceries...

Are they still good?

The green onions look kind of wilted, but so do you and you're still good... I think.

Shut up.

You didn't need him, but being without him was like being frozen in time.

Not that you had any big dreams or aspirations anyone could be envious about. It always been like that, casually cruising through life, existing for the sake of existing, no real reason needed. It just was, and there was no reason to stop, so you kept going. The path was there, so you kept walking.

But, then.

Jeon Jungkook.

Jungkook made you run.

It's not washing off.

Tragic.

Easy for you to say, you wrote yours on your bandage, 'loser'.

So terrible that you have 'lover' written in you by your lover - hey, pfft, stop! Put the showerhead down!

It was truly by chance to meet him, a moment of terror and then he was there, yelling, get off her, don't fucking touch her, and you didn't understand, didn't understand why some random guy would suddenly intervene between an interaction of two strangers, how could he sense your discomfort and fear, and now he was throwing fists, brawling with not one but three guys, friends of the one who slipped his phone and his hands under your skirt, the stranger smashing the phone with venomous rage, fighting in a dress shirt, slacks, leather loafers, and expensive-looking rings, giving you a chance to escape.

A winner at life.

Not like you, you who let something happen because you froze up in that second, disbelieving that such a thing could happen to you, a nobody, a loser.

He kicked one of them in the knee, growling, a howl followed by the sharp crack during the fight.

You could turn and escape.

Or?

You heard sirens.

You grabbed your protector's flying fist and clenched into it tightly, panicking.

Run!

This was before the tattoos.

This was before the pain.

This was before the piercing.

Jeon Jungkook had whipped his head around at the foreign touch, in this mess because he had witnessed something disgusting and because he simply wanted to fight, just wanted to beat someone up, wanted to cause real pain to someone because he couldn't control his own life, wanted to fight something.

Needed to fight.

A hand around his hand.

Run!

Never once had Jungkook thought about escape.

Not until he saw that face, fear and panic and rage and determination, stunningly beautiful, hand around his hand, not letting go, pulling, sirens screaming in the distance, his legs already moving, following, running, running, running, into the sea of the unknown.

Sinking into it.

Lungs screaming, clumsily flying through alleys, on wings of adrenaline, running after the girl in the white hoodie and red plaid skirt holding his hand, falling, falling, falling, skidding across the concrete, her arms around his, her head buried into his chest, his hands around her head to protect it, hitting a dumpster with a pained wheeze.

The sirens sped past.

He was holding her and she was holding him.

It was chance.

Just chance.

His hands were scraped up, bleeding from the trip and tumble, her white hoodie dirtied and ripped from the fall, scrapes on her legs and knees.

I'm sorry...

It was ridiculous chance.

Just ridiculous.

You clung to this stranger and laughed, laughed like a maniac, laughed like you had gone mad, crying into his dirty navy dress shirt, thank you, thank you, thank you, not knowing you were holding the one who would make you run, not knowing who or how affluent he was, now knowing of how it felt to hold his hand and kiss his lips and hear his laugh, not knowing how you would introduce him to a friend who was a tattoo artist and start his interest in them, not knowing you would sit by him for long hours and watch the art grow on his skin...

Holding him, crying, thank you, thank you, thank you for saving me, leaning against a dumpster as the stranger hugged you tightly, I got you, it's okay, don't cry, don't cry, don’t cry please, rubbing your back.

Not knowing.

Not knowing he would make you zero, not knowing you would be standing there, time and time again, verbally beaten by his own parents as he looked away, unable to fight.

And you would escape.

You would run.

He would come back.

An endless cycle until you broke it.

Then he started the endless cycle again, broken as it was, his whispers to your cheeks, I love you, cheeks that were dried of tears because you were cried out and left with a mechanical heart, I love you, heart to heartless because of wasted time, I love you, time wasted but you still loved him, no matter what you did.

Did that make you pathetic?

Did that make you stupid?

Did that make you the loser?

I love you.

Why did it matter?

Even winners die.

I love you too, Jungkook.

"Get your hands off my tits."

"Why?"

You glared at him. Jungkook grinned and spun you around, hair still a little damp, kisses on your face that made you cringe as your naked bodies tumbled on the bed, him doing it on purpose, your grumble against his kisses, should have known, his smirk against your scowl, thought you knew me well by now, capturing his lips to shut him up, sinking into his arms and the ocean that was Jeon Jungkook, the one who made you want to run through the maze of life instead of aimlessly walk down the path.

His hands on your face, staring into your eyes.

You looked back, into those eyes that once had everything, but you.

And yet, he chose to lose it all and have nothing, but you.

It didn't really make sense, being in love.

You searched for regret, but there was none to be found.

"Am I forever your waste of time?" Jungkook whispered, breath drifting over your lips.

You smirked.

"Always was and always will be."

I know you said I was a waste of time. But I was your waste of time and that was all I ever wanted to be.

"Let me at least..."

"Ah, f-fuck, Jungkook!"

Your hands faltered a little, rolling the condom down while biting your lip, gasping as his two fingers plunged into you, him moaning at the wetness, thrusting slowly and deeply.

"What, you think I can't feel good with only your dick?"

"No," Jungkook snickered, pulling his slick fingers out of your pussy and bringing them to his face, cocking an eyebrow. "Just want a taste."

You rolled your eyes as he shoved his fingers into his mouth, sucking them off, eyelids fluttering.

"You're so annoying."

He grinned around his fingers, slowly pulling them out and tracing his wet lips.

You narrowed your eyes.

You don't have to take me back. I understand now, you know... I get it. Everyone... everyone will tell you you're crazy and to not to take me back.

I'm not taking you anywhere.

I... I wouldn't blame you. I promise.

Jungkook, please, shut the fuck up.

Your hands on his chest, smacking your hips down, his head thrown back on the pillows, breathless moan at your tightness, matching his sound with your own, stretching yourself out and feeling him swell even more at the pulse of your walls wrapped around him, rolling your hips into his, wet, intense smacks, his right hand flying up and wrapping around your left wrist, watching you through his lashes with effort, losing himself in your pace, no need to ask because you could see it in his face, his open mouth and glazed over eyes, fingers slipping down, curling your nails into his skin.

“P… Please…”

Raking your nails down his chest, his back arching and eyes closing, groaning in pleasure and pain, fucking him into your mattress so hard that the bedframe squealed, setting your jaw and closing your eyes too, savoring his fullness and thickness, sinking into the ocean of pleasure that was Jeon Jungkook, the one who made you feel like no one else, the one who could make and unmake your mechanical heart, funny how that worked, your nails in his skin creating crescents of lust, your eyes snapping open as you felt his chest rise, his back arching, his hands flat on the bed and thrusting his hips up into you, one eye partly open, black hair pushed back, open-mouthed smirk on his lips.

That dark brown orb partly obscured by his lashes, but revealing all to you.

You ticked your chin at him.

“Look at me.”

His eyes fully opening, pupils dilated, hazed over with lust and stubborn love.

“Nothing is more important to me than loving you,” he panted before sinking his teeth into his lower lip, mole underneath flashing, smacking his hips up into yours hard and fast, and it took no time at all, staring at his face and the way the moonlight cradled his strong jaw and toned muscle, catching the low light and bringing out the fervor in his gaze, filling you just right, pleasure blossoming from your core and yet concentrated tightly at the same time, moan of his name falling from your lips, spilling out from your lips and in between your legs, covering him with the sweet scent and harsh squeezes of orgasm, even wetter now, his eyes rolling back, cock twitching, satisfied hiss of your name spilling out with spurts of cum filling the condom, his length shivering inside you, your thighs closing in and holding him in the air so you could feel it all.

His pleasure and him.

I won’t make it to heaven. I don’t belong there.

It’s not like I belong there either, Jungkook.

Are you sure? Only an angel would take me back.

I didn’t take you back. Only your body walked away. Your heart never left me, did it?

“You sure you don’t want to get a couples tattoo with me?”

“I’m still trying to wrap my head around how your dumb ass wants to get ‘loser’ tattooed and how you think that’s romantic.”

He pressed his right forearm against your left and grinned, watching you suck in a breath as he pushed into you again, other condom already in the trash, new one on, your right leg against his chest, sandwiched between your bodies.

“But yeah, if you want, I’ll get a ‘lover’ tattoo.”

He paused, blinking rapidly. “Really?”

You raised an eyebrow. “Yeah? Why not?”

“You never wanted a tattoo before.”

Now you raised both eyebrows. “Did you ever ask me before?”

Jungkook looked down at you, hair a mess, smile blossoming on his face, somewhere between giddiness and mania, diving down and showering you with kisses, you smacking his arms and telling him, you’re bending me in half, the fuck are you doing, and he laughed, lifting both your legs now, I’ll show you bent in half, placing them between his arms, leaning down, sinking in as deep as possible, your moan and his moan mixing together.

You’re still here.

Of course, I am, this is my fucking apartment. Ugh, your black eye looks even uglier than before.

You don’t… you don’t want me to leave?

Did I say that? Uh… why are you crying?

F… Forget I said a-anything…

Hey, stop. Don’t cry. Don’t cry, Jungkook, please…

“Fuck, you feel so good, fuck…!”

Your hands in his hair, teasing grin on your face, and he was looking down at you, I love your smug smile, fuck, your fingers combing through his hair, pushing it back and away from his face, letting him see your smug smile without any obstructions, you always fuck me so well, Jungkook, the smile breaking out over his handsome features, breathing erratic and labored, hard and rough and deep, you rising your hips to meet him for every loud smack, exhales and moans blending together, tight, wet, full, your grip on his hair tightening, closer, closer, racing to the edge of the cliff and the edge of the world, Jungkook in your hands, taking him with you, or was he the one who was leading you?

“Jungkook…”

Breathless as if you were running, winded from the pleasure, tightening around him, his head lowering, your name washing over your cheeks in a hot gasp, putting more weight on you, nearly folded in half but it felt better this way, gratifying in how hard he could fuck you in this position, staring into those dark brown orbs, his body on yours, knowing he was yours, always was, always will be, and you were his, always was, always will be.

Head pressing into the pillows, moaning his name again, loud and unashamed, the overwhelming feeling taking over, muscles tense and nerves on fire, pouring it all into the pleasure, pulsing around his jerking length, his moan of your name on your skin, shooting shivering strings of cum into the condom, massaged and milked by the strength of your orgasm, locking him in your embrace and his arms closing in, lips on lips, a fierce kiss dominated by shuddering aftershocks, trembling in each other’s hold and taking the other’s breath away, blazing hot all over even though this frozen world cared about no one.

The kiss lasted a long, long time.

It fell apart slowly, leaving you both lightheaded from the intensity.

“You’re a waste of time, Jungkook,” you whispered, heated. “But you’re my time.”

The side of his lips quirked upward, sweaty, panting, chuckling.

“That’s all I ever wanted to be.”

--

masterpost

[sxdmoonchxld]

Operation: Pop The Cherry | JJK

Jungkook x Virgin!Reader

Genre: Smut

Warnings: rough bathroom sex, college au, unprotected sex, teasing, fingering, Jungkook has a virgin kink if you couldn’t tell by he title, lowkey sadistic JK, Gay BFF Jimin, mentions of alcohol and weed, brief mention of homophobia. bIG diCK Jungkook, more belly bulging, and I forgot what else

Word Count: 6.1k

Summary: Against you better judgement and thank to your best friend Jimin. You somehow agreed to let a stranger on campus known as the Cherry Popper, too well..pop your cherry.

Alternatively: You're a virgin. Jungkook has a fetish/kink for fucking virgins.

A/N: I guess i’ll keep putting this note until i stop reposting my old stories. I use to be lizardsocial, and this fic was previously called Game. You may still be able to find it somewhere on tumblr. I edited this fic heavily and it’s honestly a new story, but there are still some elements from the fic it used to be still in there. Unedited so please let me know of any mistakes or typos. Like, comment, reblog, let me know what you think. Enjoy!

_________________________________________

Bass boosted pop music seeped through the dense walls of the energetic room. Strobing bright colored beams danced to the rhythm of the music in mesmerizing synchrony. The musty odor of marijuana, booze, and sex-saturated air shrouded the room in a turbid veil, covering the sea of drunken undulating bodies packed in the cramped living room.  Empty beer cans and other various booze bottles mixed with burnt-out blunts accompanied the young adults. You groaned with irritation and disgust. You didn't want to be here, but to your chagrin, you had a promise to keep.

It wasn't a secret that the college nightlife was unquestionably not your type of 'scene.' You quite frequently elected to willingly engage most of your time in your freshman dorm, wrapped in your weighted burrito blanket. A nightstand stockpiled with all your favorite snacks, lights dimmed low, and lavender incense burning, filling your room with the aroma of relaxation. The perfect setting to binge-watch your favorite show for the umpteenth time, the shifting distorted brightness of your computer screen, projecting the scenes against your face. 

It's kind of funny how you got yourself into this mess in the first place. The one time you decide to take the chance and branch away from the alternate antisocial hermit, your personality had adopted as its own had come back to bite you in the ass. You admit, lately, you've been neglecting your best friend. Your reasonings generally varying from the classic 'oh I was sleep' to deliberately silencing your phone, not wanting to hear the constant shrill ringing of the default ringtone. You loved Jimin, you truly did, but you could only take so much of his eccentric mashup of bubblegum and rainbow sparkles that was his personality. Eventually, guilt began eating away at you piece by piece until you ultimately caved in and invited your friend over for an impromptu movie night in your dorm room. 

Not even 30 minutes into the movie, one that you had been dying to see, might you add, Jimin commenced his drunk and high chattering. He had already started 'pre-gaming' before he came over; Six shots of straight Vodka and 2 blunts. Every day you prayed for this man's liver and brain function; with how much he drank and smoke, you would think he needed it to function. 

"Oh! Oh! Bitttch. Did I tell you about that football player, I fucckked last week!" Jimin started slurring on certain words. You noticed his eyes were glossy and glazed over. 

"No, you didn't, Chim." You sighed, completely giving up trying to watch the movie. You would have to watch it on your alone time. 

"Reeaally?" Jimin slurred, a goofy grin uplifting his lips.

"Yes, really. You haven't told me." Amusement lightly coated your voice. 

"Welll, his name is T-tae, Tae-tae something. Hold on, it's coming to me." Jimin said, rubbing the sides of his temples, trying to remember the guys' name. 

"Taehyung! That's it!" Jimin shrieked, snapping his fingers in victory.

You looked at him startled. You remember Taehyung from high school. You didn't recall him being at this college, though. Well, it wasn't like you paid attention to many things outside your bubble anyway.

"Wasn't he homophobic as fuck in high school?" You asked, genuinely interested.

"Yeah, he was. Buttt I guess he was trying to cover up, that he was actually on the DL." Jimin smiled, whispering the last part.

"DL? What's that mean?" You inquired

Jimin looked at you with a look of betrayal. "It means he's on the down-low, meaning he didn't want anyone to know he's gay. Girrl, I'm too crossfaded to be explaining this to you."

You chuckled, " My bad, Chim. So was it good?"

"Fuck, no! Dick was straight trash. The only thing that saved him a little was that his dick was huge." Jimin said, wiping away a pretend tear from the corner of his eye. 

You laughed boisterously at that. If Jimin wasn't so adamant about becoming a professional dancer. He could seriously take up a career in comedy.

"Speaking of dick. When are you gonna get some?" Jimin asked, turning his body to face you completely. As you looked at him, you noticed his eyes seemed a bit clearer, and his face wasn't as red as earlier. Not only did Jimin drink like a fish and smoke like a chimney. He was somehow able to sober just as fast.

"Oh my god, Jimin. Please don't sta-"

"Mmm, no missy," Jimin said, wagging his finger in your face.

"Don't you hear it?" He said, cupping his hand around his ear as if he was straining to hear something.

"Hear what?" You replied, rolling your eyes and crossing your arms against your chest.

"The cobwebs and tumbleweed living in your cunt."

"Jimin!" You shrieked, slapping the arm closest to you.

"Don't Jimin me! You know it's true, I swear you're gonna be a 40-year-old virgin, and by the time you finally make the decision to have sex, it'll be too late!" Jimin yelled, stumbling to stand up from the couch.

"First off, ouch. I won't be a 40-year-old virgin. That's very insulting. Second, I do plan to lose it soon. I just haven't found the time or the right guy." You said, looking down at your feet shyly. You did want to lose your virginity, but with being an introvert with a mix of social anxiety and just a dash of seasonal depression for added flavor. It was hard even to get out of bed sometimes. Much less going out and trying to find someone to do the do with.

"Oh! Well, if that's all, then I got you covered, babe. Time? Next week Friday at Jihyo's dorm. As for the right guy, I know a dude. He has like a kink for that kind of thing." Jimin answered nonchalantly, now scrolling through his phone, probably on his social media page.

You looked at Jimin, head tilted to the side, confused. "What kind of thing?"

"Oh, you know fucking virgins and shit. Popping their cherries." He said, popping his "P's."

You sputtered, exasperated. What the fuck. You didn't kink shame, that was for losers, but he can't seriously expect you to do something like that.

"What the actual fuck. Jimin, are you serious?"  

"Deadly." He said, looking you square in your eyes. His tone of voice haven dropped an octave lower.

"Jimin no. I-i can't."

"Jimin, yes! Err, I mean _____ yes, you can! Come on, it's a once in a lifetime experience. Plus, it's not like he's a total stranger. I've known him since he was 8 years old. I use to babysit the little shit head." Jimin said, waving his hand in the air, trying to swat away a rogue fly.

"Wow, Chim. You know, now that you put it like it makes me feel a lot better about the situation." You said tone dripped in sarcasm

"Really?" Jimin squealed, a delighted twinkling in his eye.

"Of course not! Don't be stupid!" Offended, you gawked at Jimin. You swear sometimes he could be so dimwitted.

"Come on, please? At least meet him, and if the vibe is not right, then you can leave no harm done." Jimin pleaded, his attention back on you. Was it crazy that you were actually thinking about agreeing to this? Jimin did have a point. It was sort of a once in a lifetime opportunity. He did know the guy, and if you didn't like the vibe, then you could just bounce, right? Right?

Sighing in defeat, your hands dragged down your face and turned towards a pouting Jimin. Grabbing at his deflated shoulders, you shook her lightly, and with urgency in your voice, you spoke, "Alright goddammit! I'll do it, but you have to stay by my side the whole time, no running off, you understand!" 

You watched Jimin's face quirk into a sly smirk. You swore you could see the cogs in his brain churning. Damn, you were going to regret this. You had the tendency to make deals when pressured. Most of the time, those agreements ended up backfiring on you, confining you in the proverbial rock and a hard place. 

"Yay! Operation: Pop _____ Cherry has commenced. Okay, so will meet at the auditorium on the art campus. From there we will walk to Jihyo's dorm, it's only five minutes. Promise me you'll actually show up and won't flake on me." A complacent expression rested arrogantly on Jimin's features, a single pinky finger extended towards you. 

"Don't give this situation a not-so-secret code name. And I can't believe I'm saying this but, I promise." You agreed, interlocking pinky fingers, yours thumbs coming up to press against one another.

"So I'll meet you at the location Friday, don't be late, and wear something sexy. No granny clothes." he chirped, making his way to your front door.

"Wait! You're leaving already?" you frowned, looking at the clock on your wall. He's only been here for an hour, and 30 mins of it were spent persuading you to hurry up and lose your virginity. You didn't even get to finish the movie together.

"Sorry babe, but I have a dick appointment." he shrugged, putting his arms through the sleeves of his jacket.

"Can you at least tell me the name of the guy who's supposed to fuck me?" you huffed, honestly you were done for tonight. As soon as Jimin left, you were heading straight for bed.

"Oh yeah, how could I forget." Jimin slaps the center of his forehead. "He's a real cutie. I would fuck him if he wasn't as straight as an arrow." Jimin looks off to a far wall, eyeing it with jealousy.

"Just tell me his name, please." You pleaded. Oh yeah, that's definitely a headache forming. You could feel it already. Jimin snaps out of his daydreaming and spins his body towards you.

"Jungkook."

Time skip to a week later, and precisely as you suspected, what a mistake that whole conversation was. Now here you were at this fucking dorm party with people you didn't know or care to get to know. Jimin had left you as soon as he saw his next piece of ass. Restlessly you hauled down the short black dress that insisted on riding up your ass, the soles of your feet protesting in the slim heeled shoes. Floundering your way into the packed building, you couldn't help but query where Jungkook was. Jimin was supposed to get around to send you a picture of the mystery man, but that never happened. Funny how now was the best time you decided to question why exactly Jimin was your best friend.

"Well damn, the pictures Jimin sent me doesn't do you justice at all. You're fucking hot." You recoiled from the closeness of the voice, the heated breath sending chills skittering down your spine, and the hairs on the back of your neck ramrod straight. Heat spurred to your face when you whisked around to meet an absolutely gorgeous guy. Like unfairly gorgeous guy. You stared wide-eyed, taking in his chiseled facial features, paired with wide doe eyes and bunny smile decorating his face. Somehow, someway he's mastered looked soft and sexy at the same damn time. And fuck was that a dangerous combination for your pussy. Your heart too, but more so your cunt.

"U-uh, thanks? Who are you exactly?" You watch as he recoils back from your with a look of apprehension on his face.

"A-are you not ____?" he stutters cutely. You think you can see the beginnings of a blush burning his cheeks. You nod your head once to confirm his question. He stared at you a minute longer before you see the recognition spark in his chocolate orbs.

"Jimin didn't send you my picture did he?" Shaking his head with his eyes close, you get the courage the scan his face a bit more. Yeah. He's definitely blushing.

"Sorry. I guess seeing you here, I thought Jimin would have...prepared you better." Shaking your head from side to side because your words refused to come out. You watched as he backed up a bit further from your personal space and thrust his right hand out to you. 

"The name's Jungkook, or J.K. Whatever suits your taste."

With clammy hands, you taking his outstretched hand marveled at how it almost covers your hand. Now that he's moved back from you, you now had to chance to see how tall he really was. Maybe about 6 to 7 inches taller. You look down at his feet and eye his combat boot, perhaps a little shorter but still taller. And big, yeah, definitely bigger. His oversized black jacket did little to hide the broadness of his shoulders and chest. You let your eyes travel down the length of his body. You bet he's hiding some killer abs under his shirt. And holy fuck, his thighs.

"You like what you see, baby girl?" Teasing, he's teasing but God, if his voice didn't make you pussy throbbing pathetically. Whimpering slightly, you let out a meek "Yes." God, you hope he didn't hear that.

Much to your dismay, he did, hear you. How he heard you with the music as loud as it was, was a mystery to you. But you watched his pupils dilate, and his nostrils flare slightly. Jungkook tucks his bottom lip between his teeth as his eyes rake up and down your scantily clad body. His heated stare scrutinized across your body, intrigue exerting over him, as he analyzed the way the snug-fitting dress molded to the curves of your shape. He could tell you didn't do this often. His dick twitched in his jeans with enthusiasm. 

It's the increase in pressure of your hand that makes you realize you're still holding his hand. You go to retract your hand from his. However, yelp shrilly as he tugs you closer to his body. Both hands now resting on his chest, and his wrapped around your waist. Fuck, you could feel the warmth and coarseness of his hands through your thin dress. A spontaneous tremor racked your body. The heat-transmitting from his frame mixed with the floral yet musky undertone of his cologne made you somewhat featherbrained.

"Fuck, you're so soft." You squeak as he squeezes your waistline, pulling you even closer against his body. You were now putty in his hands.

"Jimin told you my....preferences, right?" his voice caressed your ear. Just a slight movement or subtle twitch, and his lips would be on your skin.

"Y-yeah, he did." It should be an embarrassment how frail and breathless you sounded, but that didn't matter.

Jungkook hid his smile behind your ear. This was just too easy. Just how he liked it. He almost felt bad- almost. He was gonna ruin you utterly and completely, mold the shape of cock in the walls of your pussy. His name spilling from your lips, voice going hoarse by how loud he would make you scream. Fuck he couldn't wait. He's had virgin's before, a lot of them. That's his whole M.O. The cherry popper, virgin fucker, whatever. Jungkook's heard all the names in the book. But there's just something about you, you just had an air of genuine innocence, and he couldn't wait to defile it. 

Jungkook pulls his head back, enough to where his eyes can trail over the bared skin of your neck, and the sprinkling of perspiration sparkling off the bright strobing lights, no doubt from nervousness. His tongue traced over his thin upper lip, watching the droplets of sweat spiral down the curve of your neck. He wanted to taste you. 

"Alright, then." He jerks his body away from you. You're no longer touching his chest, but his hands are still on your waist. 

"Let's enjoy the party before the fun really begins. Every done body shots before?" Jungkook spoke casually, undeterred by the way you recoiled back or the look of stupor on your face.

"W-what? B-body shots, why?" you squeaked, failing to keep from stuttering over your words. Is this how it's supposed to go? Is this normal? You're bewildered, and just a bit perturbed. Were you just imagining that sexual tension that was going on just moments ago? For sure, you thought Jungkook was gonna throw you over his shoulders and haul you off to the nearest unoccupied bedroom or bathroom. At that instant, you didn't care. 

Jungkook regarded the war of emotions wage across your features, merriment and strobing lights twinkling in his eyes. Fuck, you were cute, so desperate staring up at him with a pout on your face a puppy dog eyes. He could honestly just take you back to the closest room and fuck the shit out of you. But he wanted to play with his prey, a bit more. The wait made it that much more satisfying.

"Don't pout too much, baby girl or I may not be able to contain myself. Follow me. The table is this way."

Jungkook didn't indulge in answering any of your questions you rambled off at him, delighted to see you trailing on his heels like a lost pup. Jungkook directed you further into the dorm, and like a dog on a leash, you followed. In the center of a sparse room sat a scraped up black table. You observed the area. It was devoid of many people. The several that were present made no recognition of your proximity in their intoxicated state.

"So who's first?" Jungkook asked, setting the bottle of tequila, rim salt, and limes down on the table.

"U-uh, I don't know. I guess it doesn't matter." You shrugged hesitantly. You were way out of your element here.

"Perfect then, you first." Jungkook should be ashamed by how excited he was at getting to sample your skin. It looked smooth, felt soft when he had you in his arms, and would no doubt probably taste as sweet as it seemed. You nodded in docility, wandering over to crawl on top of the table, being attentive to your dress. You lay flattened against the table, shiverings racking your body as he began pouring a trail of salt between your cleavage. 

He poured himself a shot in the depression of your throat and tore the lime in half with his bare hands. Smirking at how you flinched when he thumped the liquor bottle down beside your head. Jungkook pushed the other half of the unevenly split lime towards your lips, a silent gesture to take the lime in your mouth. Jungkook watched as your lips curled gently around the hull of the green citrus. A flare of lust stirred in his loins at the action. He couldn't wait to see your lips stretched around the head of his cock. He observed your eyes clamped closed as he began dropping his head forward to your chest. It was adorable and innocent. He noted the way your lips slackened around the citrus in your mouth, your chest heaving in speed, the closer his tongue trailed to your neck.

You tasted splendid, just as sweet as he thought. The salt on your skin did nothing to deter your natural flavor. If anything, it enhanced your sweetness, rendering your skin damn near mouth-watering. Jungkook's ears perked at the breathless moans slipping past the fruit perched against your lips, drawn out by the repeated pass of the wet, pink appendage lapping at the salt line between the valley of your breast. Committing your muffled moans to memory, he lapped persistently at the collection of salt and tequila in the hollow at the base of your neck.

You face flammed in embarrassment as panting moans effortlessly tumbled from your mouth. Who knew your chest and neck was such an erogenous spot. Despite your shame, you couldn't stop wriggling, shifting your thighs together for some form of friction to sate the rising arousal dampening your panties. You yelped at the sensation of blunt teeth nibbling at your skin before soft lips came to suck at the shallow indentations. Fluffy hair with an undercut came into your line of vision as Jungkook lifted his head up to your lips. Your heart stammered tortuously against your ribs, flirtatious eyes stared lidded with searing lust, his head advanced closer to your lips. Your eyes fluttered closed, lips puckering against the bitter hull of the lime.

Jungkook closed the distance, slanting his mouth over the lime, blocking his contact with yours. He sucked against the sour fruit, acidity puckering his lips, residual tartness flowing to your cracked lips. Jungkook withdrew from your mouth, taking the drained lime hull with it. Your saccharine moans were heaven to his ears. It had awoken something inside him, fueled his fire in knowing that possibly no one had ever heard such a sweet sound. He wanted more, craved more. 

"Have you ever been kissed before, sweetheart?" Your eyes followed the movement of his tongue, poking out to moistening his lips. 

"Yeah, once in like 3rd grade." Who hasn't snuck behind a tree or hid underneath the dark coverings of playground equipment to lock lips with a childhood crush?

He grinned salaciously, body moving to rest between your spread legs. Oh, now he was really excited. Your lips were practically untouched. Just another part of your body to claim first. You jumped when palms pressed flat against the revealed skin of your thigh. Gently, Jungkook rubbed lazy circles on your skin, never lowering or furthering than the hem of your dress. He felt you wiggle beneath his hands, observed your eyes, glimpsing―darting about, should you concentrate on his face, or his hand, uncertainty was etched on your face.

"Amazing." He groaned, eyelashes fluttering against his cheeks, before grinning again. His face inched closer to yours, his lips but a breath apart, warmth flickered against your lips as he talked, level and smooth. " Well, how about I become your second?

And then his lips were on you, the soft muscle mangled itself to your lips, tentative and sluggish to give you a chance to register his mouth slanted upon yours. Jungkook chuckled against your lips at your unresponsiveness. He guesses you were a little shell shocked. It only takes a few more stagnant seconds before you're shyly reciprocating his kiss. Delicate, shaky movements highlighted your inexperience. Increasingly, Jungkook increased the pressure behind lips, his hands spreading to enclose around your waist, dragging you closer against him. One of Jungkook's hands removed from your waist to bury itself in your hair, gently his fingernails scratched against your scalp, an airy moan was his reward. 

Hands completely abandoning your midsection, one gripped the meat of your thigh, pulling you to the edge of the table, flush against the tent of his denim jean encased manhood, the other embedded in your strands pulled sharply on your roots, a loud gasp tearing from you. Jungkook took that opportunity to advance his tongue into your gaped mouth. His tongue wrapped itself around yours, briefly wrestling for dominance before easily pinning your tongue in submission. His hips ground against yours, the heat of your covered core teased him through his jeans. 

He thoroughly explored your mouth, swallowing the now copious cries leaving your mouth. Reluctantly, Jungkook tore himself from your kiss-swollen lips. The ravished looked suited you perfectly. You looked beautiful, thighs brazenly spread, eyes glazed over in lust, your sticky chest heaving from the length of the shared kiss. Even in the dim lights, he could make out the taunt pebbling of your nipples. 

Your mouth gaped wide, flapping about like a fish out of water, trying despairingly to draw air into your lungs. Your first kiss definitely didn't compare to this much. Your wide eyes flicked between Jungkook and the floor, your bottom lip tucked firmly between your teeth, feeling shy as he just stares at you. Releasing your teeth from your lips, you timidly touched your mouth, admiring how plump they've gotten from the intense liplock.

Wordlessly Jungkook hitched you over his shoulder, winded with a grunt as his defined shoulder blades dug into your stomach and what sounded like a growled vibrate up into you. You squirmed lightly in his hold, scared he was going to drop you, and secondly, your panty-clad ass on display for the party-goers, not that anyone was looking. 

You watched the continuous panels of hardwood floor move beneath you as Jungkook carried you to an unknown destination. You couldn't believe you were really doing this. Were you actually going to have sex with a complete stranger? Someone who was known for explicitly fucking virgins. Realistically, you should be ashamed, yet, you conceded full control to him without a second thought. What did that say about you? About your character? Would you now be labeled as 'easy' or a 'hoe' after all this was done? What was going to happen between you and Jungkook? 

The flick of a switch stirred from your thoughts. You shield your eyes with your hand at the bright lights pouring into the room, or rather a bathroom. Jungkook loved the confusion marring your features. He wouldn't fuck you in his bedroom just yet. That was a privilege you would have to earn, no matter how intrigued he had become with you. There's always humiliation to be had in the corruption of innocence, and fucking you in the bathroom was a good start. He planned on making you watch him as he destroyed your body, popping your cherry, stretching your tight virginal hole to accommodate his length, and claimed it as his own. Jungkook shuddered at the thought, his possessive nature taking a turn for the worst. 

Impatiently Jungkook sat you on top of the bathroom sink counter, his lips smashed against yours, the previous tenderness was gone, vanished into a puff of smoke. Teeth banged, and tongues flailed recklessly against each other in the heat of passion, with you struggling to keep up with the demands of his dominating kiss. Thick fingers trailed beneath the hem of your dress, tickling the expanse of your thighs. Jungkook wasted no time in shifting your slick soaked panties to the side, a warm digit gliding effortlessly through your damn folds.

"Fuck, you're already so wet. You're enjoying this a little too much, baby girl." Jungkook growled, panting against your lips. His finger breached your sex, you tensed deftly around the foreigner intrusion, stretching your weeping walls. 

"Ah, Jungkook." You cried listlessly, rocking your hips against his stilled finger. He felt so good inside you, and it was just his finger. Maybe this experience wouldn't be as bad as you heard. Now you couldn't wait to see what his cock felt like embedded deep within your pussy. Jungkook pumped slowly, eventually introducing a second finger to help loosen you up more. You were gonna be a tight fit, very tight, but that just made it even better. You hissed at the slight burn as he began scissoring his fingers apart with each withdrawal. Your hands wrapped around his neck as you buried your head against his broad chest, your mellifluous moans suppressed by the fabric of his shirt. 

"G-go faster, please." You begged, your body adjusting and quickly becoming frustrated by the snail's pace his fingers were pumping. You bucked your hips against his hands, hoping he would ease the growing discomfort boiling in your stomach. 

"Have you ever had an orgasm before, babe?" You nodded eagerly at his question, whining as you bucked against his hand again.

"Oh, really? Who gave it to you." Slow, he was going too slow you wanted, no you needed more friction, more stimulation from him.

"M-me. I-i did." Jungkook loved how you stuttered, it stroked his ego and filled him with arrogance to know it was him, and only that was capable of making you stumble over your words.

"Mmm, and how did you do it? Did you rub this little clit of yours raw?" You cried louder when his thumb flicked at your clit, the stimulation further drawing the appendage from its hood.

"Or did you fuck this tight hole, with these tiny fingers of yours?" At those words, a loud, choked moan, even muffled by your face in his chest, echoed throughout the white bathroom. Jungkook had gone deeper inside, almost to the third knuckle. Another moan left your lips as he twisted his fingers inside you, his palm now facing upwards.

"Though you and I bought know they couldn't possibly reach deep enough to touch the spot you really want." It's euphoric, no better yet orgasmic, the sheer shock of electric pleasure that zaps through your body when he finds the spongy bundle of nerves. Your body jerked heavily, legs go to snap close, only to be stopped by his broad body between your thighs.

He chuckles softly, stroking your thigh with his other hand. Jungkook shifts his head down, bringing his mouth closer to your ear. He exhales quietly, warm air tinged with tequila and lime caresses the light hairs on you around your ear. " I found it, huh?"

You whimper, rubbing your head up and down against his chest.

"You want me to speed up the pace, sweetheart?" Jungkook's voice is delicate now, so gentle. But you're confused, overwhelmed, and scared. It's never felt like this when you did it yourself. Your not sure if you could handle the feeling, so you don't provide an answer to Jungkook's question.

"Don't ignore me ____, that's not nice manners. I'll ask again." You clench around his fingers as Jungkook inches just a bit deeper. 

"Do you. Want me. To go faster?" With each pause, he arches his fingers in a 'come here' motion, pressing deeply against your bundle of nerves, the sensation of having to pee accompanied with each thrust.

 "Y-yes, faster, more. Pl-lease." Fuck, you sounded so pretty begging for him if he wasn't addicted before. You had him sprung now. Jungkook buried his face in the crook of your neck, the sharp smell of tequila and salt still lingering on your skin. He sucked at the junction where your shoulder and neck met. You bucked harder against his fingers, your juices now dripping to coat his palm is sticky cream.

"If you wanted more. Why didn't you just ask?" Jungkook said deviously. Confused, you felt withdraw his sticky digits, walls gripping to stop their departure. Without warning, Jungkook flipped you over onto the counter, your knees buckled at the sudden change in position. Your faced burning at your displayed state, droplets of your essence dribbled from your pussy, slicking up your inner thighs. You yelped as Jungkook grasped at the length of your hair, pulling back pointedly, your neck craned back to observe him addressing you in the mirror.

"You've been wondrous for me ____. Such a sweet girl." He expressed, his empty hand disappearing behind your perked ass to fiddle with the groin of his pants. 

"Truly, you have. Your response and reactions to my touch have really gotten me riled up. It's been a while since I've tittered on the edge of losing control." You wheezed, starting to panic as you felt the thick head of his cock slap teasingly against your slicked throbbing hole. Oh, God, he's huge. Jungkook's cock might just tear you apart. You shifted your hips forward, pressing against the cold marble of the bathroom counters door.

"I-i don't think, I can t-take it Jungkook, you're too b-big. It's my first-time, r-remember?” Your stuttering worse now, but you're scared.

Jungkook pulls your hips back with the hand the was grasping his length, the side of your hip now coated in his pre-cum. His hand lays flat in the crease of your back, forcing you into a perfect arch. 

"You can take it, all of it. And don't worry, of course, I remembered your fragility. I'll go slow, I promise." You plead silently with your eye contact through the mirror. 

"You ready?" You nod once an advert your eyes down to the sink.

Your mouth shakily falls agape as he slowly began pushing the head of his cock into you. It burns, but not as bad as you had anticipated. You take the chance to look back up into the mirror, adamant about giving Jungkook a thankful smile for his gentleness. That vision that greets looks like it jumped right off the page of your favorite erotic story. 

Jungkook's got his head thrown back, the edge of his t-shirt clenched tightly between his teeth, your eyes trail the drip of sweat that follows the curve of his jawline. You have a clear view of his abs all the way down to the v-cut of his hip, to the happy trail that leads to a neatly trimmed bush of pubic hair. You clench tightly around him, efficiently aroused by the view. You feel his cock throbbed heavily inside you, even getting bigger if possible.

"You like that, sweet girl? You like seeing me struggling to contain myself because you're so tightly around me. This little pussy trying to milk me for all I can give you." You love it. You feel powerful in a way. Do you really feel that good around him?

"Yes." Jungkook draws out the 'S.' 

"You feel amazing, so warm and wet. I wished you could see how coated in white you've got me, and I'm not even all the way in yet."

You scream soundless as he bucks into you, shoving in half of his length. It doesn't hurt anymore. You just feel stuffed full. Lifting a trembling hand, you take the chance a feel the lower part. You noticed swelling that wasn't there before, intrigued; you push down against it, moaning in shock you realize it's Jungkook's cock. 

"Yeah, baby girl, that's all me, well, most of me. You ready to take the rest?"

"Yes! Please!" That's the clearest you've been all night. You don't get an answer as Jungkook immediately picks up his pacing, thrusting into you faster. He wastes no time pumping deeply into your tight pussy, his tip smashing against the entrance to your cervix as you pant and grit your teeth in slight discomfort, overshadowed by pleasure. The burning sensation is back as he fucks in deeper with each brutal and swift stroke. But you don't care cause it still feels amazing. You can hear yourself, sloppy and soaking wet, echoing throughout the bathroom. You're drooling down his pistoning cock. You can feel it dripping down your inner thighs. Your head jerks violently against your shoulders, to weak support your head from his menacing thrust. 

Tightened vocal cords released strained shrieks of praise; from your mouth, drool dripping from your lips, into the sticky cleavage of your breast, and sweat coated your skin. The coil in your stomach was quickly tightening, never had you felt anything so deep inside you. If you ever had sex with anyone else, they would never compare to Jungkook.  You were fucked both figuratively and literally.

Jungkook pulled you further from off the sink, the new position allowing him even deeper. You clawed at the marble tops underneath your fingers, your eyes rolling in the back of your head. That sensation of having to pee is back again.

"J-K, I-m. I have to-," You don't get to finish as the band in your stomach snapped. Silently you announced your release; if it wasn't for the new wave of cum coating his cock, or the fluttering tightness of your walls, Jungkook might have missed your orgasm. He wasn't far behind you. The constant clenching of your ridged walls around his cock, had him reaching his limit sooner than he would like. Jungkook had half a mind to pull out but decided to gamble his odds. You're the first person he's fucked raw in a while, and with three deep thrusts later, he was shooting his hot seed right against your cervix. 

Breathing heavily, Jungkook lets you fall against the sink, observing as you crumpled against the sink countertop. Pride swelled his chest as he watched his seed bubble out of your well-used hole. He's never contemplated going farther with the virgins he fucked. He wouldn't make any hasty decisions now though there were still a lot of things he wanted to do with you. He would sleep on it and revisit the idea in the morning.

"So would you say, Operation: Pop Your Cherry was a success?"

You giggled, winded, still having difficulty catching your breath. You straighten up against the bathroom counter, the majority of your weight still resting on the object as you had yet to regain the feeling in your legs.

"Jimin and his stupid code names. I swear when I get a hold ass, he's dead." You warned already preparing your revenge on your best friend. You stare at Jungkook in the eyes through the mirror, smile a bit goofy, you say.

"Operation: Pop My Cherry. Mission complete."

[itgirlification]

supermodel | jjk

the last three months have been hell for you, but Jungkook seemed to be living his best life.

pairing: ex-bf!jk x thick!reader

warnings: explicit mentions of body image and insecurities, infidelity, anal sex, oral (male receive), foul language (kinda), etc.

now playing: supermodel by sza

part two part three

Exactly three months ago, your and Jungkook’s 2 years relationship officially ended. Unofficially, it ended about 5 months ago. And for about one month now, Jungkook’s been seeing someone else.

Your heart and mind told you not to do it but you couldn’t help calculating. Three months ago, you were still dating, two months later, he started dating someone else. That must mean he’s known her for a while. Did he cheat on you with her? Well, it’s not like it matters now anyway, does it?

Her name was Yuki, an undeniable Japanese beauty. You were still in college, studying music and she was a famous model who appeared in internationally known magazines. You assumed she met Jungkook during a photoshoot since he was a professional photographer who often worked for companies like Vogue and Playboy. You couldn’t help but compare yourself to her.

It wasn’t the fact that he moved on so quickly that hurt you the most. It was the fact that he knew all about your low self-esteem and how you lack confidence. Especially about your body. And he still went and dated a model, of all professions in the world. He was definitely over you.

If you didn’t know any better, you’d think he did it on purpose. But thankfully, you knew better, he looked too happy for that to be even considered. He forgot about you.

You’re making yourself sadder by remembering all the times he assured you you were beautiful and your body was nothing to be ashamed of. The times he let his fingertips run over the lines of your stretch marks, whispering in your ear how much he loved them and how they reminded him of Tiger stripes. The times he caressed your jiggly thighs and told you how sexy he thought they were.

Then your mind would drift back to the phone in your hand, the Instagram page of Yuki Sakurai opened, careful not to accidentally like anything and expose yourself. Not that she’d notice anyway, she had 3.7 million followers, while you had a private one with 500 followers and no posts, and she gets around 300 to 700 thousand likes on each post, depending on whether she posts random photos or pretty pictures of herself. Or newly, your ex-boyfriend, Jungkook. Oh, how crazy everybody goes whenever she posts him. People love them together. You couldn’t blame them. Two attractive people? Of course, they’re gonna look great together.

Fucking great.

That the end of your relationship with Jungkook would look like this was semi-predictable from the beginning. He did admit to you that he never thought he’d date someone that looked like you when you first dated. And your heart broke a little. But he also made up for it in those two years, it was a beautiful relationship nonetheless.

While you weren’t exactly his ‘ideal’ type, he was definitely yours. You always heard from other women ‘when in a relationship, the man always has to love the woman more than she loves him. Otherwise, it won’t work.’ You never really got the saying until your breakup with Jungkook happened. It was the fact that you clearly loved Jungkook more than he loved you that lead to this.

“Oh my goodness!”, your roommate, Jane, dramatically exclaimed. “Will you stop feeling bad for yourself and do something? That’s not what hot girls do, sis.”

Jane was a lovely girl with a not so lovely temper. She always means well and you got along perfectly as soon as you met. Which was around 3 and a half years ago.

She looked over your shoulder to see what you were looking at. You obviously didn’t want her to see you snooping around your ex-boyfriend’s current girlfriend’s Instagram but it was too late.

“Seriously, yn?”, she took your phone in her hand and threw it on the bed. “Let’s go somewhere, you can’t do this to yourself anymore. I’m not letting you.”

Jane was clearly worried about you at this point. The only thing you did these last few weeks was eating, shower, cry, sleep and miss a whole bunch of classes. This wasn’t good at all.

“Where?”, your question was short.

“To the mall? Or the nail studio? Anything that’ll get you out of this fucking dormitory.”, Jane sighed, pulling the blanket off of you, making you whine a little. “C’mon, go put on some cute outfit and we’ll go.”

You felt bad since she was trying hard to make you feel better. But it didn’t really work.

You nodded, standing up from the bed, nonetheless. You picked out a cute two-piece dress, that brought back blurred memories of the time you went on a date with Jungkook, wearing the same two-piece. Bet Yuki would look cuter in this...

‘Shut your petty ass up, yn. It’s embarrassing, the way you’re stuck on a taken guy who wants nothing to do with you’

You wish you could change the way you think, even if it’s just for an hour or two. You wish you would stop imagining Jungkook judging you when he saw you naked or when you told him that you wished you could cut off some of your fat with a pair of scissors.

You were beyond ashamed of yourself. Why wasn’t it easy for you to just stay by yourself? why were you so desperately in need of Jungkook by your side to the point where you’d lock yourself in your room for a month just because he isn’t there?

You needed Jungkook. You became so attached to him in those two years, because you always saw him as a permanent, a forever. Not just a temporary, not just a distant memory. You already saw him as the father of your children, as the man you’re gonna marry.

You were so blinded by the fact that you had him, that you forgot you could lose him anytime.

“I’m done, let’s go.”, unenthusiastically, you announced to Jane, who was already waiting for you.

“Let’s get the fuck outta here!”, In contrast to your spirit, hers seemed to be all roses and daisies. “Lord knows you need it...”

__________

“Look at this cute ass skirt, girl”, Jane pointed at a chic, wine mini skirt she was holding. “You know, when I saw it back there I wanted to have it, but it’d look so much better on you”

You took a few seconds to admire Jane’s beauty. She was about 3 cm taller than you, had a great posture, and almond, dark brown eyes that suited her dark skin tone perfectly. Her body leaned more towards the slimmer side.

“Shut up! No, it would not”, you let out a small giggle. “It would look gorgeous on you, buy it.”

She smiled a little at your laughs. She was happy to see you at least a little cheerful again. “Yeah, but I think it’d look better on you. I’m entitled to my own opinion, am I not?”

You knew this debate was gonna go back and forth, because of her stubbornness. “Let’s both buy the skirt.”

You ended up doing so, added by a bunch of bags full of clothing. This may’ve turned into your new coping mechanism. Who needed therapy when you can go on a shopping spree?

Two hours were spent in boutiques and clothing stores and Jane decided she was tired, wanting to visit the local spa.

“No, seriously, these Riverdale seasons just keep on getting worse and worse. Netflix needs to step up their game ASAP”, Jane ranted, making you laugh at how serious she takes it. “It’s getting embarrassing. I’m being for real.”

The two of you were sitting in the whirlpool at the spa, relaxing your whole bodies a little.

“Yeah, yeah, whatever, I don’t watch these new Netflix shows anyways. Been stuck on the vampire diaries for the last 7 years”, you chuckled, knowing you hated trying new things. “Can you pass me one of those magazines?”

Jane nodded, grabbing a random one from the table next to her and handed it to you, without looking at it.

The cover of it caught your eyes immediately. How could it not, when your ex’s new girl looks absolutely dazzling on the front page of it.

‘Supermodel Yuki Sakurai talks summer fashion tips, struggle with self-love and most importantly, her hot, new boyfriend the media is going crazy over’ was the headline of the Harper’s Bazaar Magazine cover.

You felt your stomach getting sick and your breath getting heavier, but you still flipped the pages until you found the one with her interview. You began reading it, skipping the boring parts.

‘Int: so, we see you have a new boyfriend. Tell us, how did you guys meet?

Yuki: Yeah, he’s an amazing guy. We actually met about six or five months ago at one of my photoshoots, since he’s a photographer and we exchanged numbers and stuff, and then we made it official mid last month.’

About six or five months ago? You were with him back then, but her answer was too unclear to find out if he cheated or not.

“Woah, yn, you okay?”

You entirely forgot about the fact that you were with Jane, let alone somewhere other than your bed.

Before you could react, Jane snatched the magazine out of your hand.

“You really can’t escape them, huh?”, She sighs, taking you in her arm. “It’s gonna be okay, baby. In a few months, you’re gonna look back to this and think wow I really was stuck on a guy who’s scared of microwaves and cried like a bitch when Iron Man died.”

You laughed, punching her arm playfully. “You know, I actually love these things about him. Shows his sensitivity and the way he perceives things.”

Jane looked at you as if she didn’t believe you were actually saying that stuff. “Girl, you’re overanalyzing this. Let’s just throw this shit in the trash, okay?”

She put the magazine aside.

“I just don't know what I did wrong.”, You murmured. “I know we weren't the best, but we didn't even fight that much. We could’ve talked it through.”

Jane pursed her lips and cooed. “You know, relationships are complicated sometimes. The reason why he broke up, to begin with, is probably not your fault.”

“Well, what if it is? I mean what if I was too fat or too ugly for him?”, you asked. “If he wanted a skinny girl so bad, I could’ve lost weight for him, I don’t get it.”

Jane looked at you like you lost your mind entirely. “I can’t believe you just said that! Even if that was the reason, which it wasn’t, you shouldn’t make yourself suffer because of it. That’s his loss. You’re beyond gorgeous and you have an amazing body.”

“You’re just saying that.”, tears slowly started coming up in your eyes. “But the thing is Jungkook knows all about my insecurities. Why would he do that to me? I know he knows that I’m still not over him.”

You usually didn’t like crying in front of other people, but you didn’t really care at the moment, besides that was Jane. You trusted her with your life.

“Girl, men are trash, I can’t believe you’re crying over one right now, seriously.”, she wiped your tears and held your face between her hands. “You know, honestly, I’ve read so many articles about how models actually hate themselves and have like the lowest self-esteem so in conclusion, no matter how miserable you are, his new girl is even more miserable.”

You knew Jane didn’t mean it in a harmful way, but it sounded harsher than needed. “I don’t hate her, she probably doesn’t even know about me. I’m just really insecure. He upgraded from me. He’s dating a whole model now.”

The situation just felt like a deja vu of these last few weeks laying in your bed, even though you were at the spa with your friend. You were supposed to have fun, yet you didn’t feel like having any.

“Why would you feel insecure when all you’ve seen of her are Instagram posts and red carpet pictures? She’s supposed to look beautiful, it’s her job.”

To a certain extent, Jane was right, but that didn’t really help your situation, you still felt bad about yourself. You stayed silent.

“C’mon, this isn’t fun anymore. Let’s leave.”, Jane mumbled.

_______

it’s been two days since the incident at the spa and you felt a little bit better now.

Those days were spent reading the same three book series you’ve read your entire life, overthinking, hot Cheetos, Indian takeout, and Netflix. It really wasn’t as miserable as it sounded.

You were just taking a little rest before term break ends and you have to go back to the shithole college again.

Jane was using the time until college starts again, but in different ways than you were. She was planning on going to some frat party in an hour and forget about the world’ for a minute. Or till 4 in the morning, where she will most likely drunk call you and ask you for a ride back to the dorms, because the friends she went to the party with were shit-faced as well and were in no way capable of driving anywhere without the cops stopping them.

Going out partying on a Friday night was a Jane tradition. In the past, you’d sometimes go with her, but you mostly spent your time out with Jungkook doing something more fun than partying could ever be. Now you can’t do that anymore, but laying in bed is more ideal than a party for you at the moment.

“How do I look?”, Jane twirled around to show off her black cocktail dress. She looked beautiful.

“You look beautiful.”, you responded to her question. “Are you leaving now?”

“Hm”, she said, to which you nodded. “You sure you don’t wanna come with me? It’s gonna be really fun.”

You shook your head no.

“Alright”, she shrugged, making her way out of your bedroom. “But I told you, it’s gonna be fun.”

You chuckled, rolling your eyes. “I’ll stay here, I have shit to do.”

“Yeah, right, like binge-watching the vampire diaries and taking 5-hour naps”, she said in a sarcastic tone. “Anyway, bye-bye, Vic’s already waiting for me in the car.”

Victoria was perhaps one of the most obnoxious people you know, yet she was too much of a nice person for you to talk shit about her. The voice of your intrusive thoughts couldn’t help but to, though.

“Alright, bye, take care and say hi to Vic from me.”

After Jane left, an hour went by like it was just a couple of minutes. You were starting to get real bored and decided to watch some regular tv in hopes to find something you enjoy. You ended up not finding anything fun, but you still watched it, because you didn’t have anything else to do.

A few moments later, the doorbell rang and you were suddenly worried. Either this is a serial killer or Jane forgot something.

But to your surprise, it was neither, but it was none other than

“Jungkook?”, truly, those were the only words you were able to mutter out at your shocked state. “What are you do-“

At the speed of light, you were interrupted by your ex-boyfriend pressing his lips to yours. He didn’t say a word.

You weren’t expecting him. Not knowing how you were supposed to feel at the moment, you just let it happen. You were sure your mental state couldn’t get any worse than that, no matter how this will affect you in the end.

“Is Jane home?”, for the first time in 3 months, you’re hearing his silky voice again.

Jungkook knew Jane always had some type of special hatred for him with her killing stares and her bitter comments. You didn’t notice either though.

He also knew she must hate him even more after your breakup. Or maybe she liked him more now since she was able to get rid of him without killing anyone.

“No”, your answer was short and it made a weight fall from Jungkook’s shoulders before he continued kissing you.

It wasn’t anything you haven’t done before, yet it felt like it’s been ages since it last happened. Your mind drifted to the thought of Jungkook and his model girlfriend. You were asking yourself what their sex life was like, if she was tighter than you or if she had stretch marks and scars.

Jungkook’s lips were moving south, giving your neck wet kisses, while you were wondering why he broke up with his model girlfriend. Or if he even did. You felt selfish for not caring.

Removing your clothes one by one, you were left in your underwear, while Jungkook only had his boxers on.

This body was yours. You knew it inside out. Where he liked to get touched and where he preferred not to. You knew him better than anyone else. You were sure.

You already moved to your bedroom, since Jungkook effortlessly carried you there. You were sat on his lap, facing him and your hands were in his messy hair. His hands were around your waist, he was slightly smiling into the kiss, as you started grinding on him. He loved how easy it was for him to turn you on. You were still his.

Cutting off the kiss, he looked you in the eyes, while his hand was on your cheek. “Say aah.”, he said.

You widened your mouth obediently, which was followed by him collecting as much saliva as he could in his mouth and spitting it into your mouth.

“Swallow.”, demanding, he spit on your face, his eyes become darker with every passing moment. You did as he said.

You looked at him with big eyes. He knew you loved it. You’ve always had a thing for him degrading and humiliating you during sex.

He started grinding on you almost desperately. You knew exactly what he wanted.

Getting out of his grip, you dropped to your knees and freed his hard dick from his drawers. You reached for it and started pumping it, and licking it. Your spit was leaking down his dick as you used it for lubrication. Then you started sucking on it, just the way you used to.

Jungkook’s groans and satisfied sighs were enough to make you even wetter than before. You enjoyed giving more than receiving.

Your mouth was wet and warm around him, giving him a feeling of familiarity. You lick over the tip a few times, then proceed to fully take him into your mouth.

The bulge in your throat could be seen and the way your eyes were tearing up a little wasn’t bothering you at all. You loved giving.

Jungkook started thrusting in and out of your warm, welcoming mouth, his tip hitting the back of your throat multiple times.

“Fuck”, a throaty moan left Jungkook’s mouth, giving you hints that he was about to cum. And he did, releasing in your mouth before you swallowed it. “Shit, baby, that was so good.”

You felt your face heat up and a sheepish smile made its way to your face. Your throat was sore.

The two of you were on the bed again. To you, it felt like it was the times before your breakup again, when you’d purposely start an argument just for the makeup sex because Jungkook wasn’t giving you any anymore. It was like sex was the only thing to look forward to.

You felt attached to Jungkook to a point where it was dangerous. You weren’t okay when he wasn’t around. He affected every part of your life and God knew it wasn’t always a positive thing. Maybe it was the fact that he took your virginity. Maybe because he was your first boyfriend, the first guy that made you believe you were worthy of love and that someone was actually capable of loving you. One thing you knew was Jungkook had an expansive influence on your life.

While you were practically drowning in your own thoughts, Jungkook was busy taking off your underwear.

“You okay?”, Jungkook calmly asked you, looking at your riddled face.

“Huh? Yeah, I’m okay.”, you sounded distracted, Jungkook wasn’t sure about asking you what it is though. He didn’t feel like getting personal.

So he shrugged it off and started kissing you again, his dick was unsurprisingly hard again as he played with your tits. He drew lines over the stretch marks of your thighs and kissed them.

“Can I fuck your ass?”, Jungkook’s raspy, tired-sounding voice casually asked, to which you quickly nodded, knowing that Jungkook’s favorite position had always been anal. He was massaging and gripping your ass firmly.

“This is gonna hurt at first, but I promise it gets better.”, He warned calmly into your ear, while putting some lube on his dick and just went right into your ass, slowly thrusting so you don’t feel as much pain.

He was right, it did hurt a lot when he first put it in, but the pain just changed into pleasure in a matter of time and his slow-paced thrusts helped with the adjustment.

“Fuck, I missed this ass”, he practically growled into your ear, as he kept on thrusting in and out, steadily gripping your wide hips with his big, veiny hands. “It just doesn’t feel right when I’m inside her ass.”

You knew your confidence shouldn’t rely on Jungkook bringing his girlfriend down, but you couldn’t help but feel good about your body when he said that. It’s been a while since you felt even a tiny spark of confidence. You weren’t so fond of him mentioning her while he was inside of you.

Your soft moans rang through the whole room like sirens, while he watched your ass jiggle against his pelvis, thrusting in and out faster every second. He missed this.

You had always thought you were indecisive, but you knew exactly what you wanted. You just couldn’t have that, so you’d eventually have to settle for less.

Jungkook wasn’t to blame for it, you just couldn’t concede your shortcomings. The movie’s villain wasn’t always the real villain.

Your hands traveled to your pussy to make sure you’d orgasm as well, when you heard Jungkook’s breathing getting heavier and his thrusts getting gentler than before, indicating that he was gonna cum soon. You were certain he could make you cum with just anal, but you wanted to cum with him.

With furrowed eyebrows and drops of sweat dripping down his body, Jungkook looked down at your arched back. The whole scene was sticky, especially when Jungkook presses his upper body to your back, whispering sweet nothings into your ear and kissing the spot.

It was kinda odd, having sex with your ex-boyfriend you were crying over just a day ago. There was a certain intensity to it though. Like your long-lasting nostalgia was finally fulfilled.

You’ve realized you couldn’t imagine yourself being intimate with anybody else. Jungkook already knew your body, how it looked without the material protecting it, the strawberry skin, the slightly sagging breasts you swore you’d surgically remove once you had the chance to but didn’t. He knew where you liked being touched, he was the first one to even touch you in those places.

You were unsure what you’d do with yourself when he leaves.

Jungkook’s thrusts slowly started stopping and you too felt the familiar sensation in your stomach.

Suddenly, you two were nothing but desire, fear, and pleasure. And faster than you could process, you came together.

For minutes after your orgasm, you were just laying on the bed, thoughtless. Maybe a little regretful. Not you, but him.

You weren’t facing each other, but you could hear each other’s breathing. Your stomach was filled with something you’d describe as post-sex melancholia.

All of a sudden, Jungkook stood up from the bed, startling your resting self a little, but you decided to keep quiet, wanting to see what he was going to do.

He made his way to the door to leave what he thought was your sleeping body laying there. You couldn’t keep quiet anymore.

“Where are you going?”, your soft voice suddenly rang in his ears. “Don’t you wanna stay?”

He didn’t know how exactly to tell you. You’ve always been a gullible little girl, you were the type of girl to think fucking equals love. Little did you know that wasn’t the case at all.

“Yn.... you know I can’t”, Jungkook responded, you knew it wasn’t gonna be good when he said your name like that. “I got a girl at home and I don’t wanna mess shit up with her.”

There it was. Your suspicion was corroborated. He was still going out with the model and you were a certified home wrecker. Great.

You physically felt your heart breaking. “Bu- but why are you here then?”

You were incapable of being mad at him at the moment. It was your fault for letting him in, again. After breaking your trust and your heart.

“This was a mistake”, he declared, not looking into your eyes. “I’m sorry, yn...”

He’s moved past your room now, already at the exit of your dormitory. He was about to leave.

“You already ruined shit with her when you came here and fucked me.”, your voice was small, but your words were heard.

Without looking back, he left.

And you went back to your room, standing in the middle of it for a minute in silence before your brain fully processed what had happened and your tears started pouring.

[raggaraddy]

hello, so if you still take requests i want to request yandere reaction where the reader is as possesive as them, or like she willingly do anything for them and obey them. its totally okay if you dont feel like writing it or maybe you dont take request.. its just im craving reading something like that and youre a great writer :)

A/N: Hi, I am still new to writing reactions, so I hope that this is what you wanted or you at least like it.  Thank you for your sweet comments. Enjoy!

Mine

Summary: When another girl gets a little too comfortable with Jungkook your reaction's a surprise to the both of you.

Trigger warnings: Fighting, mentions of abuse, violence.

Jungkook

You had begged Jungkook to take you with him tonight. He'd been so busy with work lately and you'd found yourself missing him too much when he was gone. So when he said he wasn't staying home tonight, but he was instead going out to a bar with some of his friends, you were enthusiastic for him to take you with him. It had used to be the complete opposite. Every time he left you alone, gave you some time to breathe on your own, you were thrilled. But more and more you'd started noticing him in a new light.

Sure he's rough and demanding sometimes. And yeah, he can lose his temper every now and then. But you're not perfect either, and you know it must be hard for him, especially when you behaved so insensitively at first. However, despite your flaws or his, he deeply loves you. He accepts you for who you are and he wants nothing more than to keep you safe. How could you ever find anyone else who cared for you as much as your Kookie did?

The night started as every night out with Jungkook did. He listed out the same rules over that he had said dozens of times before.

You have to listen to everything he says and do everything he says. You don't talk to anyone unless he's with you, and most importantly, you never leave his sight. You had tried to run off a few times in the past, so you knew how deathly serious he was about that last one.

After thoroughly prepping you, and dressing you, and warning you one last time to mind the rules, the both of you finally went to meet his friends.

"Sit. Here." Jungkook pointed to the booth table at the back of the bar. You slid in and he right away pushed in alongside you, nudging you in further and further until you were all but barricaded against the wall. As his friends began to come in one by one, they all joined in a large group. While the night went on, you talked among his friends and their girlfriends. A few people got food, but most people were just drinking to excess. You of course got the choice of soda or water. Every now and then throughout the evening, you could feel JK's attention on you, and you would hug his arm a little tighter to let him know you were paying attention to him too.

At some point, it was Jungkooks turn to buy the next round.

"Y/n." He whispered lowly. Even in the middle of a conversation and with the music playing in the background, his voice caught your focus right away. You looked up to him, a small smile and big eyes. "I'll be back in a few minutes." His lips pressed to your ear, his warm breath blowing along your neck spiking tingles down your side. "If you even try to move while I'm gone, I'm going to pin you to the table by putting this butter knife through your hand." He twirls the point of the dull knife into the table, scratching the wood.

Your smile grows a little bit bigger at his threat. Not because you think he wouldn't do it, but because you know there is no way he would ever need to do it. You're not going anywhere.

Your fingers linger with his, holding on for a few seconds extra as he gets up. While the conversations go on, your concentration keeps flicking to Kookie. Watching every now and then to make sure he hasn't left your sight either.

On one momentary glance, you catch sight of some random woman standing too close to him. They're at the bar, and it's quite crowded so it could be nothing, but she doesn't look like she is ordering drinks. She's completely facing him. Talking to him.

Slowly your frustration starts to build as a few minutes pass and they stay in the same position. You don't know who she is, you've never seen her before. Jungkook's body language expresses that he doesn't know her as well. She, however, is acting way too familiar. Laughing, smiling, flicking her hair and pushing her chest out like some kind of desperate slut.

You're trying to let it pass. But after only about 10 minutes of silent stewing, that's all you can tolerate. You know your Kookie has no interest in any other girls. He's just too innocent to realize that this girl is flirting with him. That, or he is only trying to be polite.

She crosses the line though when she decides to put her hand on his arm.

He might have told you to stay in your seat, and you know he is going to at the very least slap you for willingly going against his rules, but you have had enough and you're not going to allow this bitch to paw all over him anymore.

Shuffling out of the booth, you take heavy, furious steps towards them. The second you're in reach you draw against Jungkooks side, wrapping your arm around his. At the same time, you roughly and forcefully shove the heel of your palm into this girls shoulder, knocking her back and off of him. She stumbles looking shocked and fleetingly frightened. You're not done sending a message yet.

"The next part of you that tries to touch him is going to get stabbed!" You growl. Jungkook leans back a little to look at you. A mix of intrigue and surprise coming together to form a smirk on his face. It's not just from the forceful action you made, but also the confident, ruthless way you spoke to intimidate her.

This woman is dumb though. She either doesn't see or doesn't understand how sincerely you made that threat. "Wow," she scoffs. Yelling, trying to be louder than the music, "Is this your girlfriend? She's a psycho." she mocks, stepping forward, speaking directly to Jungkook. You pull yourself in front of him, dragging his hand around your waist to wrap on your hip, your fingers lacing over the top of his. Even with you standing between them, eyes burning with hostility she still doesn't back down. "If you want a cool girlfriend, you can come home with me, baby." She propositions him, with the cherry on top of calling him baby. Calling your Kookie baby! Who the fuck does this bitch think she is?!

You snap forward and slam your curled up fist into her face as hard as you can. She mustn't have been expecting that at all because she falls like a ton of bricks. Knocking into two or three other people behind her before she ultimately falls on to the floor.

Honestly, you've never hit someone before, and you didn't realize it would hurt so much. So you have to quickly shake your hand feeling the bones bruised and jarred. You regain your composure by the time she can gain hers and looks back up to you. You step over the top of her getting into her personal space. "Go find someone else to be a pathetic whore with." You snap. "He's mine!"

She scrambles out from under you and back to her feet, sensibly darting away. Over your shoulder, you can see Jungkook taking control of the consequences of your interaction, assuaging the bartender's concerns. JK knows them all, so if they know that it's him, they're not going to make a fuss over it, they'll just let it go and assume there was a good reason.

You latch onto him again as he focuses back on you. Grabbing your hands into his shirt, you hold him closer. "Don't let other girls touch you."  You whine, taking the aggression out of your voice when you talk with him, but not the seriousness.

"Why? Because I'm yours?" He looks down with a smug smile, and a salacious glimmer in his gaze. His tongue running over the inside of his cheek.

You're still so pent up and frustrated, you just want to be as close to him as you can be for comfort. You press your whole body flat to him, feeling warmed by the firm shape of his arms and chest. "Yes, you're mine."

He insists on a small amount of space between you two, gripping onto your upper arms harshly he pushes you back. His free hand comes up and his fingers cling into your jaw keeping you still.

This is it. You knew he was going to hurt you for disobeying. But honestly, it was worth it to keep her off of him.

Looking down at you so intensely, he isn't reacting the way you had expected. His eyes are instead filled with an infatuated allure that's making your stomach tingle and your cheeks feel warm. He rests his mouth next to your ear like he had earlier. "That was so fucking hot Kitten." His teeth nip at your ear lobe, making you shiver. "We're leaving. Just wait until I get you alone. I'm gonna prove I'm yours."   

[aajjks]

TPOL!JK

before you can even argue with him, he’s kneeling before you with a beautiful diamond ring. “you’re such a-“ you can’t even finish your sentence before your hand goes to cover your face. “you’re gonna propose while we’re arguing? you’re such an asshole” you complain but you’re smiling through it all.

this is definitely the most unromantic proposal ever but you don’t need anything grand from jungkook. not when he has your heart in his hands and you love him too much for your own good.

“of course i’ll marry you” you say and jungkook is eagerly sliding the ring on your finger and despite the loving moment, you’re still a little pissed off with him because he went through your phone. completely disregarding your privacy and suddenly you’re feeling a bit of regret for accepting his proposal.

you guys hadn’t even resolved the issue at hand and he probably used the proposal to steer you away from talking about it. “i hope you didn’t propose to me to shut me up” you say with a hint of suspicion in your voice.

“jungkook, i know you love me and i know namjoon might’ve been better for me but i’m here with you aren’t i?” you say walking up to jungkook and wrapping your arms around his neck.

“this is sweet and all. i love the ring and i love you but without trust, then you minds as well take it off my finger and propose when you feel like you can 100% trust me”

He tsks.

“Yn I trust you 100% but I don’t trust that asshole! But if you want something more romantic, I can do that! But the ring- you already saw it, man.” There goes another failed proposal. Maybe he did it in a little hurry but he didn’t do it because he doesn’t trust you, but rather he just wanted to.

You are right maybe you need a little time before this. He needs to get rid of namjoon, so he’s off his knee and he pulls you in for a hug before you give him the ring.

Yet still, your reassurance is not comforting.

“you are right I’ll propose again again when the time is right and all..” he sighs, “but I am sorry for going through your phone but curiosity got the best of me and the way he was texting you I didn’t like it’s… but yes, your anger is valid and I shouldn’t have gone through your phone..” he scratches a back of his head and takes out his phone instead.

“just to make up for this you can go through my phone.” he happily gives the phone in your hands. “you don’t know him like I do I just want you to know that and please just keep on rejecting his advances because you want me to trust you and I really do but it’s hard for me when he keeps on persuading you like this…” and of course, he’s honest about this as well.

Jungkook looks at you once more before kissing you on the crown of your head. “Yknow why I got this ring because it had three diamonds and you know what that represents…” he’s got a sheepish smile on his face, and his eyes are a little sparkly as he begins to tell you why he chose this one.

“I got it because it represents you me, and Jaemin yn.” You two and his mother are his family and he cannot even think about losing you guys.

But the thing that is still bothering him is that how his friend has in fact, even after knowing the fact that you and him share a son- he doesn’t even know the fact that he’s not even yours, but rather Chaeyoungs.

What a bastard.

Jungkook breathes in relief as he realizes that he doesn’t know that. “I hope you haven’t told him that jaemin is not you know..” he gives you a knowing look, hoping that you’ll catch his hint

Chaeyoung is still in an institution receiving treatment, but he’s actually concerned about the fact that if Namjoon found out about that- they might get together and try to devise a very evil plan, of separating you and him.

“W-What if he finds out about Chae?” Jungkook finally voices his concern with you once again.

[anenbylittlepotato]

The demon bros reacting to MC being bullied for being overweight and very self conscious? (Never talking much/never wearing short sleeved clothing/etc.)

Ooh, okay, I can do that!

The Bros Reacting to a Shy and Self Conscious MC

Dateables Here

This MC is very shy and self-conscious about their body due to bullying in the human world. They don't talk much and never show much skin.

Lucifer

He doesn't pay much attention to you not showing much skin. He, himself isn't particularly fond of showing skin, so he understands that much.

What he doesn't understand, however, is why you always avoid eye contact, and rarely speak, talking quietly when you do, and tend to shy away from any social interactions, with him, his brothers, and anyone else.

He's the last person to care about or even notice physical appearance, so he doesn't even consider that might be your reasoning for it.

So when he approaches you about it and you tell him it's because you were bullied for your appearance, he's taken aback for sure.

"Well, if that's all, then I assure you, you have nothing to worry about. There's absolutely nothing wrong with your body."

He'll definitely ask some questions about these bullies. Not for any particular reason. He just wants to... Talk.

And he'll also go out of his way to reassure you of your beauty and chance he gets. Not in front of his brothers though...

And if he catches any other demons harassing you about your body, they'll definitely regret it.

Mammon

As the second most talkative and attention-loving out of the brothers, he definitely notices how little you talk to him, and how you stray away from social interaction and never make eye contact! Plus, you always talk so quietly! Ugh, he can't understand you if you basically whisper everything, dammit!

And, as someone who isn't exactly shy about showing a little skin, he notices that too. He's definitely suspicious about that. What are you hiding under there...?

He brings it up and??? It's because you were bullied???

Give him names.

Someone is going to die today.

No one bullies his human! >:(

"Ya got bullied? Well, why didn't ya tell me?! I woulda done somethin' about it for ya! Plus, I ain't got a clue what you're worried about. Ya look fine, jeez!"

Anyway, he's gonna commit a homicide, see ya later!

Nah jk, but he's definitely considering it...

He'll... Try to remind you that you that you look beautiful, but he's really bad at it. He always ends up becoming a flustered mess and can't get the words out. It's okay tho, you get the point.

He'll openly beat the hell out of any other demon who tries to harass you about your body.

Leviathan

Haha, mood lol XD

All jokes aside, he does notice how you avoid social interactions and don't talk much and how you always talk quietly. He can't exactly judge you though, he does the same thing.

He also notices how you never show skin. Which... Okay. He's not really the type yo show much skin either, so he doesn't really mind that much???

Honestly, he's probably the most understanding about it, seeing as he has his own fair share of self-consciousness.

Though it is kind of annoying when he's asking about how you like an anime he recommended to you and you only give one or two-word answers. I mean come on! He needs more detail than that! He wants a full video essay on your thoughts, not just, "It's good," or "I liked it." Give him something here, man! How's he supposed to know that you actually liked it if you don't give detail? Or even that you actually watched the show!

One day he idly brings it up to you while you're playing video games together.

When you tell him you were bullied for your appearance, he pauses the game and looks at you.

Sure, he's gotten bullied too, but for him it was because he's an otaku and a shut-in.

"Th- there's nothing wrong with your body! If anything, I'm the one who's ugly... I'm just a gross yucky otaku... Y- you look way better than I do!"

He would totally go do something about those bullies but... There's a raid later today, and the next episode of an anime he likes comes out tomorrow, and he has a concert to go to... Plus, he's not very good with confrontation, and he'd have to actually go outside, and he's a shut-in, so he's not exactly in shape and...

But he'll definitely try to help you feel better about your body! Though... It'll mostly be small things because he's not sure his little heart could handle any more than that. So he'll occasionally tell you that you look nice, things like that.

And if he finds out other demons are harassing you about your body... He might consider summoning Lotan to put them in their place. Or he might just have you stay home and do online school with him.

Satan

He isn't exactly the biggest social butterfly either, but he isn't really shy, so he definitely notices how little you talk and how you avoid social interaction. And you talk quietly, which is rather frustrating for him.

And then there's the fact that you never show much skin, which is annoyingly similar to how Lucifer never shows skin. Are you trying to copy him or something...?

When he brings it up to you, he's a little taken aback to hear that it's because you get bullied for your appearance. He's not one to worry too much about that sort of thing, so it hadn't even occurred to him.

He should have known though. From what he's read, it's a pretty common issue in the human world. Not that it's any less common here in the Devildom.

"So that's your reason, huh...? Well, you needn't worry. Your body weight doesn't make you any less beautiful."

He asks some... Questions about these bullies. What? No, no, he isn't going to do anything to them. Not at all. He just wants to see these bullies for himself, that's all...

He'll go out of his way to make sure you know you're beautiful. And he'll tell you about historical figures and main characters of books he's read who were overweight but described as beautiful.

And if any other demon dares harass you about your body... Well, let's just say they won't be shown any mercy from his wrath.

Asmodeus

Noooo, don't hate yourself, aha, you're so beautiful!

Jokes aside, he's is the most talkative and attention-loving, so he definitely notices that you're avoiding eye contact and don't talk to him as much as you should be. Pay attention to him, dammit!

And when he tries to dress you up, he definitely notices how you avoid anything that shows skin. Come on, darling, you'd look so good, just try it!

One day he whines to you about it. When you tell him it's because you were bullied, he gasps dramatically.

Bullied?! How dare they bully his precious, beautiful little angel! He's offended!

"Darling, don't you dare listen to those awful bullies! You're beautiful and don't you dare forget it! Besides, that just means there's more of you for me to snuggle!"

He would go do something about your bullies but... He just got his hair done! And he doesn't want mess up his manicure! And his clothes might get wrinkled!

However, he will absolutely shower you with compliments any chance he gets. You're beautiful and he wants to make sure you know! But of course, not as beautiful as him ;)

And if he finds out any demons are harassing you about your body, well... Let's just say that Asmo may not lose his temper often, but when he does... It isn't very pretty.

Beelzebub

Beel doesn't really pay much attention to things like how much skin someone shows, but he does notice how little you talk.

At first he though it was because you weren't getting enough food but... He sees that you eat just fine at meals???

He's a little concerned, so he approaches you about it.

When you tell him it's because you were bullied, he's honestly just confused as to why other people are so concerned about your appearance??? It's none of their business??? It's not like you being overweight affects them???

Besides, he doesn't think it's bad, anyway. You look just fine to him. If anything, it means you eat well! That's a good thing in his book!

"Don't worry about it, MC. I don't think you look bad at all."

He's not really the type to go out of his way to cause trouble, but he might go talk to Lucifer about it.

He's really sweet about it and will tell you how wonderful you are. He'll also give you food to make you feel better.

And if he hears about any demons harassing you about it, he might "accidentally" lose control and eat them. Not in front of you though, he doesn't wanna scare you.

Belphegor

He honestly doesn't care whether you show skin or not, honestly.

But he is annoyed by the fact that you talk so little and rarely just say how you feel. Hiw is he supposed to know what you want if you won't speak?

One day he just comes to you and asks you bluntly about it.

When you tell him about the bullying, he just... Thinks you're stupid for listening to them. Who cares about them? It doesn't matter what they say, they're not you, they know nothing.

"MC... Don't be stupid. It's not their body, so why should they have a say in it? Besides, you make for the perfect nap buddy."

He's honestly way too lazy to actually do anything about the bullies. Why commit homicide when you can be sleeping? Come sleep with him, MC.

He's honestly not the type to give you compliments and try to make you see you're beautiful. Instead he'll just make you take more naps with him.

And if hears of any demons harassing you about it, he definitely won't hold back.

==

I might do the side dateables later too if y'all want me to.

[1kook]

commercial break ; NINE

this is part of my netflix & chill series!

SUMMARY “I think that, like— me and you? We’re like, totally destined,” you ramble, “you should, like, take my number! And maybe we can, like— Netflix and chill one of these days?” WARNING angst with implied smut at the end!!, flashbacks, low self esteem, alcohol consumption, jk is (implied) a virgin in this, there’s a lil fondling by oc u know the usual  MISC they r soulmates <3, our queen doyeon returns, i tried to use symbolism👁 in the dialogue so yes everything drunk oc says has a meaning hehe RATING m bc alcohol WC 2.2k

NOTES i said once a long time ago that n&c couple were prolly at the same party once but didn't realize so hERE WE GO ! its not proofread bc um. yeah<3

Homecoming week. 

Jungkook doesn’t even think his university’s football team is good, but he had read somewhere that part of the college experience is obnoxiously supporting this team all four years. And well. Jungkook wants to fit in. Frankly, Jungkook feels a little dumb having accepted this invitation from Kim Taehyung from his first-year writing class. He’s only known the man a solid four weeks, probably won’t know him this well once Taehyung finds real friends, ones who suit his outgoing personality, and decides Jungkook is too boring, but Jungkook will make the best of it while he can because, again, he wants to fit in. Badly. It’ll be different this time, he had told himself while getting ready. You won’t be awkward anymore. You’ll make friends. 

And then it’s nearing midnight and Jungkook has spoken to a whopping two people at this party of over a hundred. Not including Taehyung, it’s down to one. Even that had only been to ask where the bathroom was. He feels severely out of place, like he’s both too large and too small to be in this area, to be at this party, so he shuffles into the kitchen when he hears them call for another match of beer pong. He’s actually pretty good at the game, has refined his skills at get togethers with his older cousins. But it’s not like anyone here wants to be Jungkook’s partner anyway. Or even knows who he is for that matter. 

Taehyung had bumped into him a little past ten, had had two girls clinging to his sides when he had greeted Jungkook. One of them had almost looked tempted, Jungkook wanted to believe, brushing her hand against his arm. But he didn’t act quick enough— what would he even have done? what did he even want? —and Taehyung disappeared with both girls soon after, leaving Jungkook by himself once more. 

The kitchen is empty, the drinks long since having migrated to the living area of this huge frat. With a defeated sigh, Jungkook sinks back against one of the counters, setting his lukewarm cup of beer down beside him. He’s buzzed, drank in a feeble attempt to ‘lose himself’ as all the movies claimed. But now all he can feel is a pounding headache threatening to consume him. He doesn’t even like drinking— why did he drink this much? 

He should go home. 

Events like this, parties like this— they weren’t meant for someone like Jungkook. He was too quiet, too shy to let loose like everyone else. He doesn’t do well in social situations, or at least not as well as his therapist had told him he would. He hesitates too much, never speaks when he needs to. Haerim from his freshman basics class had even said so. “You’re quiet, huh,” she had smiled, and when her notebook had touched his elbow, he flinched. She didn’t take it to heart. Just like Taehyung wouldn’t if he left right now. They know how he is. He doesn’t belong here. These types of parties were made for outgoing people, people who lived on the edge, people who weren’t trapped in their own thoughts all the time, people like—

Like the girl who stumbles through the doorway now. “Woooo,” she slurs, and then promptly faceplants into the dirty tile of the kitchen, the same tile littered with sticky footprints and random debris. He can’t even imagine what else is on the floor of a frat house mid-party. Jungkook flinches at the sound of her knee hitting the ground, before rushing over to help her up. 

She’s a giggling mess, eyes half shut by the time Jungkook gets her into a seated position. “Are you okay?” he flounders, hand on her shoulder when she wobbles again, nearly falls back down. 

“Just peachy,” she sings, flashing him a sloppy thumbs up. Her neck isn’t doing a particularly good job of holding her head up and when Jungkook places a hand on the back of her head, she leans into it, blissful smile on her face. She’s really pretty, it makes Jungkook’s cheeks burn when she aims it at him next. “Pucca loves Garu,” she lets him know, eyes finally fluttering open. “He’s a pretty boy.”

Jungkook blinks. He has no idea what you’re talking about. “Huh?” he stutters, glancing back at the bar stool by the counter instead. It’s probably infinitely times better than the sticky tile beneath your bare legs. “I’m gonna stand you up,” he tells you, taking your loud cackle as a sign that you’re okay with it. Jungkook’s been working out all summer, so you’re not heavy in the slightest, arms thrown around his shoulders while he slips his own around your back. Your proximity leaves him drowning in your scent. 

The giggles don’t subside when he sits you down, not even when he begins opening random cabinets in search of a glass to get you some water. He’s had his fair share of experiences looking after drunk people, so he has a pretty good idea of what to do now. However, your sudden bout of commentary certainly doesn’t make it easier. “Isn’t it, like, super cool how the sun and the moon are, like—“ a hiccup, Jungkook settles on tap water “tooootally different beings, but, like— they, like, both maintain the earth?” Your hand reaches for his forearm when he returns, gives him this little squeeze in your excitement. “Like— Like they both have to, like— work together? To keep it perfect, y’know?” 

Jungkook pushes the water into your hands. You’ve got this sparkly sheen to your eyes, the one that most people get after one too many drinks, but it’s accompanied by this childlike wonder that leaves Jungkook breathless when you meet his gaze. “Yeah,” he says quietly. You beam. It’s blinding. So blinding that Jungkook promptly looks away, nudging the cup in your hands. “You need to drink this.”

You frown. “Boooo, so boring,” you huff. It’s nothing Jungkook hasn’t heard before, but it is a little disheartening to hear it from a stranger. He stamps the feeling down, pursing his lips as he gives up on letting you drink yourself. The cup is swiped from your hand and Jungkook tasks himself with making you drink it instead. And of course, like all wasted young adults, you put up a fight. “Ew, what is that?” you spit. 

Jungkook sighs. “Water.” 

At his defeated tone, the exaggerated grimace slips off your face, replaced with a rather solemn expression instead. Jungkook tries to take advantage of it and pushes the cup against your lip again, but all he really accomplishes is sloshing it down the front of your dress. You don’t yelp, but he does. “I’m so sorry,” he panics, sliding the sleeve of his shirt down around his thumb to wipe your chin. 

You let him, head tilted curiously to the side. Jungkook tries to ignore your analytical gaze until: “you’re cute,” you announce, and abruptly send him into shock. 

He recoils, face a blazing mess. “I’m—“ he chokes, swallowing when you wipe your hand down your own chest, leave a glistening layer of water over your sternum and down between your breasts. 

“Cute,” you repeat, downing the glass he had been trying to coax into you like it’s nothing now. With it gone, you don’t waste any time, throwing your hands around his shoulders, fingers brushing through the hair at the base of his neck. You pull him close, so close in fact, that he ends up having to hold the back of your chair to keep from accidentally crushing you with his weight. “Your name, pretty boy?” 

He can’t think. You’re so drunk and smell so good and are just so pretty— his brain short circuits. “Um I’m, uh, Jeon J—“

“Jeon,” you repeat, silly smile back on your face. You’re not technically wrong, so he nods along with a blush high on his cheeks. “Well, Jeon,” you purr, but you’re still so drunk, eyelids fluttering in a rather funny way. “I think that, like— me and you? We’re like, totally destined,” you ramble, “you should, like, take my number! And maybe we can, like— Netflix and chill one of these days?”

Jungkook doesn’t even know what that means, and honestly, he doesn’t really hear you over the thundering of his own heart and the bass in the other room. “Um, but you’re really…” he stammers, leaning back but a finger loops around one of his curls and he gasps when you pull at it. “You’re drunk,” he rushes out, lower lip trembling when your nose knocks against his. 

A soft hum, the sound sending electricity down his spine when you cup his cheek. “But don’t you think I’m pretty?” you murmur, eyes flickering to his mouth. 

“Yes,“ he chokes out, “you’re a very, very pretty girl. But I really shouldn’t—“

“Hey,” you shush, tilting his head just the slightest. Jungkook has never had a girl touch him like this, has never even touched a girl before either, but, well. He really wants to kiss you. And that’s saying a lot considering Jungkook has never kissed anyone before. 

Despite how good it feels, he knows you’re still really drunk. It’s with a decisive huff that he pushes away, hands on your waist to keep you from touching up on him any further. You’re not that strong anyway. And then he’s met with the biggest pout he’s ever seen, an absolutely distraught look on your face. 

Something in him says you’ll cry if he doesn’t explain himself soon, so he launches into it right away. “You’re very pretty,” he says, almost laughing at the way your entire face lights up immediately. “But you’re very drunk.” You huff. “You deserve to be treated like a queen.” Mostly regurgitating something he heard in a motivational video. 

It works. Eventually, you stop being fussy in his arms and settle with a frown. “You’re too nice,” you grumble, forehead on the countertop. He doesn’t see how it’s much better than the floor but he lets you be. “You got a girlfriend, don’t you?” 

At that, Jungkook laughs. “No,” he reassures you, hesitates, and then gently pats your back. Jungkook actually feels you melt under his touch. That sultry look is gone, replaced with this rather tranquil look that he doesn’t quite understand. 

“That was pretty,” you murmur, but Jungkook doesn’t quite hear. 

“What was that?” he asks.

“I said your smile was pre—“

“There you are!” someone hollers from the kitchen doorway, the shrill tone of their voice making both you and Jungkook jump. When he turns around, he’s met with the sight of a rather tall girl angrily stomping your way, eyes a blazing fire, fists clenched by her side. Jungkook realizes only a second too late that she’s looking at him. “Get off of her, you sweaty city-owned dumpster,” she hisses, using the strength of three football players to push Jungkook away. “You make me sick—“

“Doyeonie,” you beam, launching yourself into the angry girl’s arms. Ah. The Help had arrived. 

Said angry girl (Doyeonie?) is still using every mash-up of words possible to degrade Jungkook as she hauls you into her arms, shooting daggers every step of the way. “I can’t believe you would try to take advantage of a poor girl when she’s this drunk,” she spits. 

“What?” Jungkook coughs, cheeks warm. “I wasn’t—“

“Tell it to Campus Safety when I report you, you wannabe, dollar store Rain.” Jungkook clutches his chest at the acidity of her tongue, surprised anyone could be so mean. 

All things considered, this was actually good. Someone who knew you had come to take you to safety, meaning Jungkook didn’t have to look after you anymore. When this Doyeonie turns around, he’s met with your smiley face smushed against her shoulder. 

(It’s weird. He’s a little sad to see you go.) 

“Bye, Jeon,” you giggle, hand brushing down his arm, squeezing his hand, before you’re abruptly yanked away. Jungkook manages one weak wave, cheeks lit ablaze once more when you send him a silly air kiss from the doorway, urging him to catch it. He does, and he feels really silly when he puts it in his pocket, but he can hear your laughter for a second more before he loses you. 

The last few minutes being so hectic, he decides to go home. Parties weren’t really his thing. Jungkook doesn’t think he’ll ever go to one again. 

Until a few years later. 

“You’re, like, really pretty,” you slur, lips against his throat. Another invitation, this time, Taehyung’s birthday. His friend had practically begged him to come, knowing how Jungkook was. In the end, it had been you who had accepted on his behalf. 

“Baby, not here,” he laughs, hand on your shoulder when you try to shove your hand down his pants for the third time that night. 

Taehyung had been ecstatic to see Jungkook here. And then had quickly become annoyed when he caught the two of you making out in his storage closet an hour later. “Bro, don’t be that couple at parties,” he had groaned, locking the door behind him. 

Jungkook had laughed. “I wouldn’t know what ‘that couple’ is at parties,” he reminded him. 

Taehyung rolled his eyes. “Well, I’m sure your girlfriend can fill you in.”

Apparently not. You’ve been trying to kiss him for the past three minutes but keep missing because you’re so drunk. “Just one,” you beg, so pretty but so drunk. The fake lashes you’d worn today make you look like a doll, batting them his way until he’s giving in, slotting his lips against yours. You’re probably going to throw up in his bathroom when you get home, so he should make the best of your kisses now. Jungkook pushes that thought aside as he reaches a hand out to wipe at the sweat accumulating on your chest. There’s something weird about the gesture, like he’s done it before at another party. But that doesn’t make sense; he couldn't have— this is his first party with you. 

“We should, like, leave,” you whisper against his ear, fingers burying themselves in his hair; when you pull on a strand, he nearly moans. “Go home. Maybe netflix and—“ a hiccup that makes him smile “—chill?”

Jungkook kisses your temple. “Sounds good to me, pretty girl.”

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