#jimitri

[spookystarfishzombie]

[lokiiied]

ah, yes i love gayer things

[frustrated-writer-skyeknight]

Treehouse sleepover

... with somebody way ahead of time the "sleep" part.

They're all childhood friends.

[skyeknight-oneshots]

Sweaters

"Yo Gory," Dimitri greeted with a bit of a smirk, "nice sweater."

Jim raised a brow because that's definitely not something Gregory would wear, but when he goes to check he saw that, indeed, the guy was wearing a winter sweater with several reindeers running in the center to form a circle around a reindeer head that's easily assumed to be Rudolph the red nose reindeer, not to be mistaken for his brother.

"Dude, what happened?" Jim said with a bit of a snicker, "Did you lose a bet?"

Dimitri laughed, "Must have." he said, "Because that looks awful."

"Shut up," Gregory scowled, but did nothing to hide the sweater's print, even if he had a coat that could give him that option. "I like it."

Now, Jim and Dimitri were staring at him incredulously. Even just looking at him, anyone can tell that the sweater wasn't something you would see Gregory wear. Throughout the year, they usually see him wear clothes of the greyscale, whether they were blazers, hoodies, T-shirts, or tank tops. This sweater was decidedly... Colorful.

Then, out of nowhere, a brunette wearing a winter cap jumped on Gregory's back while laughing happily. Meanwhile, Jim and Dimitri were wondering if the guy had a deathwish. They were soon gobsmacked when Gregory laughed as well, hands on the arms around him before he turned around. The brunette was placed back on the ground before Gregory leaned down to kiss him on the lips briefly.

"You wore it!" The brunette beamed.

Gregory smiled. "I said I would, didn't I?" he said. "When I said I liked it, I really meant it, Ryder."

"It's just... I usually see you wearing grays or black, sometimes red but more on the dark tones." Ryder fidgeted sheepishly. "I totally forgot I meant to give it to you when I was knitting it and made it too... Colorful, but I already had a lot of reindeer sweaters and I was making it to give it as a gift and..."

Gregory interrupted his rambling by kissing him again. "I love it, Ryder. I love that you made it colorful and the reindeer print;" he held the others' hands and kissed the knuckles on each hand. "because whenever I look at it, I'll be reminded of you and your bright spirit."

Ryder all but melts at the declaration before hugging his boyfriend. Gregory chuckled before leading him into the school building, totally and purposely forgetting to introduce Ryder to his friends.

"Huh," Dimitri blinked, "When his brother was teasing him about a secret lover, I thought the secret was there was no such lover."

Jim shrugged, nodding in agreement. "Ryder Nattura... Never would've guessed it'd be him." he said. "But they look cute together, hope it works out."

"Aw, does 'Death glare Hawkins' actually have a soft side?"

"Sure," Jim hummed non-chalantly, "it started when I chose to date a big baby like you."

Dimitri smirked, "I don't think I make one particular part of you 'soft' though."

The infamous death glare came out and Jim punched him on the shoulder. Dimitri was used to it, but damn, it was still hard. Still, that was Jim's 'I'm just being shy and don't know what to do about it so let me hit you' kind of punch.

"Hey guys."

Jim and Dimitri turned to see Rudolph come in with his arms hooked with Tony. They see him looking sullen, and realized the sweater that looked just as awful as the one Gregory wore.

"Greg's boyfriend made you one too?"

"No," Rudolph glared at Tony, "I lost a bet."

Tony laughed, "Be happy I actually let you wear something to school today, Rudy." he winked, "After all, no one appreciates your six-pack more than I do."

[childofsolace-write-ups]

May or May Not Write

JiMitri AU idea where ...

It's a Hercules!AU except...

Jim is Meg who made a bargain with Rasputin to resurrect his father only for the man to come back alive for the sake of his mother being happy but Leland went off with another woman leaving Sarah devastated and dying due to the heartache and Jim extended the term of the bargain by having his father and mistress killed.

Dimitri is a selfish, lowly nature spirit. The four rulers of the nature spirit domain, Jack, Hiccup, Merida, and Rapunzel punished him to be a mortal to learn how to be selfless and only then will they decide if he could be a spirit again or forever mortal which is pretty much a death sentence eventually.

Then JiMitri romance ensue.

[rest of the plot is not yet sure. Just thought about this AU now.]

[frustrated-writer-skyeknight]

I ship HiJack as my OTP, JiMitri coming in second.

Of course I don't need an interaction haha I'll make one up.

It's their personalities I wanna see mixing.

i got polls now so i'm kicking this off with something that's been eating at me for a good month or so

[the-aleksy-show]

Writing at night >>>>>>> Writing in the morning

[citrondemon]

Hello and welcome to self-indulgent russia gang art, hosted by yours truly

⬆️ inspired by this amazing jimitri fic🥹

[annminaminohawkins]

Fucking love HiJack and Jimitri in the same post lmao

Incorrect Quotes

Hiccup: I’m cold. 

Jack: *Takes off his hoodie and helps put it on Hiccup*

Dimitri: I’m cold too.

Jim: Well I can’t control the fucking weather.

[spookystarfishzombie]

[lokiiied]

just thinking about dmitri going home and cutting his magazines and kicking his feet on his bed while gluing the letters making this silly ransom note for his prisoner boyfriend

[frustrated-writer-skyeknight]

Childhood friends > Brothers outside blood > Best friends > Boyfriends > Lovers > Partners

[skyeknight-oneshots]

Httyd AU alternatives #002

"Welcome to Dragon Training!" Gobber intoned.

Astrid took a breath before stepping inside with the others. "No turning back."

"Okay," Jim took a deep breath, gripping his axe before following Astrid's lead along with the others. "you got this... Don't screw it up, Jim..." he mumbled, psyching himself up.

Another recruit stepped beside him, "Hey, look what the wind blew in." Dimitri grinned, as he winked at Jim which earned him a raised brow, "Must be something to have to deal with dragons for the first time on your birthday. Don't worry, I'll watch out for you."

"Aww, really?" Jim batted his eyelashes at him, "Then maybe you can do something for me now?"

Dimitri grinned, encouraged by reception of his advances, "Just say the word."

"Don't be a distraction." With that, Jim punched him at the gut before moving on.

"Well done, Dimitri," Jack snickered, passing by and patting him on the back, "A for effort."

Dimitri grunted, "Yeah... Probably should've known it wouldn't be that easy." he said, "Still, he said I distract him. That's gotta mean something."

"Yeah, that you're a distraction." Jack laughed.

Tuffnut cheered from the other side, "Yeah! Let's get some burns!"

"Pfft, duh. Otherwise, what's the point?" Ruffnut snorted, "Maybe a mauling or two at my shoulders, a bit on my lower back would be good too."

Astrid shrugging, humming in agreement. "Yeah, it's only fun when you can get a scar to show for it."

"Are we betting on who's getting hurt the most today?" Everyone flinched, and turned towards a voice they didn't expect to hear today. "Here's a hint, it's probably going to be me." Hiccup sighed, rolling his eyes.

Snotlout huffed, "Oh, great." he sneered, "Who invited him?"

"Must want to share his experience. I mean, he did take out the 'Night Fury' after all." Tuffnut snickered.

Jack rolled his eyes, bonking both of them with his staff. "Lay off guys; we're technically all on the same side." he walked over to Hiccup and gave him a thumbs up. "Hey, best of luck today. Oh, I like your axe."

"Ah," Hiccup lets out a little high pitch laugh before getting some words out. "Um, yeah! You're welcome!"

Jim face palmed before going over hurriedly.

Jack blinked at that response, "Huh?"

"He means you're welcome to see him use it today." Jim explained, before grabbing Hiccup by the shoulder and dragging him along. "The word you're actually looking for is 'thanks', by the way."

Hiccup groaned, his face all red. "I know."

"Then fucking use the right words at the right time if you know."

[childofsolace-write-ups]

Draft reveal

JiMitri - Mass effect Andromeda

"Dimitri, there you are."

A pretty elemental, with long red hair, turned towards Jim and Dimitri as they made their entrance to the party. If he'd have to guess, Jim would say she's a wind elemental by the way her hair seemed to moves on its own, flowing around her as if she was under water.

Dimitri smiled charmingly as ever, giving her a mock salute as greeting.

"I was beginning to think you changed your mind about showing up," She rolled her eyes, "I'd have to hunt you down; after all the trouble you put me through to snag you that invite with a plus one deal."

The smuggler shrugged, "Better late than never, right?"

"No. Now introduce me to the new kid."

Jim raised a brow, "Not a kid."

"I'm about 218 years old." The woman said with a smirk, "So kid."

Jim sighed. The human species should figure out how to lengthen their lifespan sooner or later. He hated when that excuse was thrown in when he made that argument.

"Anya, this is Jim Hawkins." Dimitri said, "The human pathfinder." He looked towards him now, "Hawkins, this is Anastasia Romanov. The Elemental representative to Viggo. And a friend."

Pressing a hand to her chest, she bowed slightly in greeting.

"Hey old lady."

Anya scrunched up her nose, narrowing her eyes then. "I'm not old. I'm still young, as far as an Elemental standards goes."

"Well you're 318." Jim smirked, "By human standards, that's old. Even ancient."

Anya glared at him, before it finally starts cracking and she laughed. "Oh, I like this one. He's feisty." she looked towards Dimitri. "I can see why you won't stop talking about him."

"Really." Jim looked towards Dimitri, raising his brow once more.

Dimitri evaded the question. "And on that note, you two enjoy getting to know each other." he said. "I need to check on something."

"Seriously?" Jim glared at him. "You invited me here and now you're gonna ditch me?"

"No, I'm coming back." Dimitri refuted. "Why, you gonna miss me while I'm gone?"

At that, both Anya and Jim rolled their eyes, Dimitri would've thought that they rehearsed it.

"Just" Jim sighed, "Try not to get us kicked out."

"I'm not gonna spoil your night," Dimitri laughed, "I promised." he winked at him once before walking away.

Anya shook her head. "And there he goes."

"Sounds like that happens a lot." Jim looked towards her.

Anya nodded, "But I wouldn't worry about it, I'm sure he'll be back soon." she smirked, looking towards Jim. "He likes you."

"I've gotten the impression." Jim deadpanned.

Anya laughed. "And he thinks he's so subtle."

[whenyourshipfinallysetssail]

Just some random

STRANGER THOUGHTS 2

***SPOILERS FOR SEASON 4***

*****My smoldering hot-takes on the season’s hottest DILF. 🥵******

Jeezus, is it a million and one degrees in here, or am I trapped in a Russian Prison with Enzo?

See, that’s funny because you’d think a Russian prison would be cold, but then there’s a hot DILF in there.

Question number one: ok yeah enemies to lovers but has anyone ever tried “helpful prison guard to sexy cell mate?” Is that a trope? Can we make it one?

Now you’re probably asking yourself, does this crazy bitch ship Hopper and Enzo?

And the answer is yes, of course I do, but not in an “I’m gonna be mad if this show doesn’t make this cannon” sort of way. I know nobody is queer-baiting me here. If anyone is queer-baiting me it’s me. I’m very good at it, thank you very much. I can imagine incredibly straight men are in love when they’re on screen together in my eyeline for too long. That said, Ronance, Steddie, Byler, and Jargyle: make it canon or we riot. [How fucking dumb was it when they just threw a random chick at Argyle to show the audience he’s got a big case of the not-gays? Who cares. This show loves smashing straights against each other. Show me some bi 80’s teens or shut the fuck up. Also, watch out, everybody, cause the Mileven Mafia is about to come gunning for me: I don’t give one single fuck about Mike and El’s relationship and I never have. El’s busy, guys. She’s got a whole “facing down an inter-dimensional existential threat/I’ve got two dads but one is abusive and one’s in a gulag” thing going on. Fuckin’ don’t make her date a boy right now.]

Now, back to that gulag. Ah, Enzo. Dimitri “Enzo” Antonov. My imaginary boyfriend that someone else imagined for me, who is never going to date my other imaginary boyfriend from Season 1 [on TV, at least. In head canon it’s already happening and you can’t stop it] for two reasons: A) because obviously Jopper is a thing and the writers aren’t going to suddenly drop that just because we got season 2 of the gay pirates. (But wouldn’t that be WILD? What if they had shot two versions of the ending and they held back Vol. 2 so they could use the gay ending if Our Flag Means Death got renewed? Would the internet survive the aftermath?) And B) my two boyfriends can never date because canonically Season 1 Hopper died in Season 3 when the Duffer Brothers got amnesia and started telling David Harbor to just scream at everyone in every scene. RIP, baby. I still love you.

[Side-Note: I’ve got so many good hashtags for this ship you guys: #jimitri #hopptonov #enzopper #hoppzo. They write themselves. These men fit like puzzle pieces. Sexy, sexy little puzzle pieces. Mmmm. Cold, boys? Why don’t you two papa bears snuggle up for warmth? Yeah . . . Yeah . . . That’s real cozy . . . . . . . ANYWAY]

And of course, C) #jimzo #twopigsinablanket [lol, they’re both cops] is never gonna happen because they’re absolutely setting up my glorious Russian cinnamon roll for a tragic heroic death.

Look, snow-muffin, I love you. You’re the steely-eyed, growly-voiced, salt and peachy mustached, true friend to the death, morally grey Russian with a not-so-secret heart of gold of my fuckin’ dreams. I’d watch a whole spin off that’s just you teaching your son to ice fish in silence. I want you and Mikhail to defect to America and move in with Jim and El and wind up in a super bi thrupple with Chief Hopper and my self insert OC. (Her name is Azelia Moondragon, she has three different color eyes, she can change genitalia at will, she has an IQ of 3.6 billion, and and she’s more powerful than the Mind Flayer, Vecna,El, and eight demogorgons put together . . . Nah, just fuckin’ with you. Her name’s Kate Kauffman and she’s a 38 year old therapist from New Jersey with a secret drinking problem.)

Listen, my ice duke, my proud Siberian wolf, my shot of Svayak with a spoonful of caviar, we both know you could have an AMAZING arc in Season 5. We both know you could wind up snatched by the US government and forced to remain at the lab in Hawkins while the feds scramble to cover up the existence of the Demogorgon you saw, that you could have a moving side mission to bring your son to the US illegally while you help your bestest pal Hop and his annoying girlfriend [no, she’s fine, it’s fine, I like her, they’re good together, not all the hot men want to kiss each other, and that’s ok] parent their sulky teens and save the damn world.

We both know you could fall madly, passionately in love with the mysterious new psychologist that the lab hires to provide you and the other Demogorgon survivors “trauma and readjustment therapy,” but who has secretly been tasked with wiping your memory so you can never go back to Russia and tell the world what you know. We’re both well aware that after she succumbs to your arctic-foxlike charm, Dr. Kate Kauffman could never bare to wipe your memories, that she would instead confess that she is not a psychiatrist, she is in fact a powerful psychic, a subject of the experiment that preceded Hawkins Lab, that in a fit of tears as she laid bare her secrets she would lift up her sleeve to reveal the mark on her wrist, faded, but perfectly legible: “000,” and then as you took her in your arms and told me no harm has been done, all is forgiven, you’re here to protect me now, the two of us would begin to float into the . . .

*Ahem* At any rate . . .

My beautiful near-winter ermine, we both know you have so much potential as a character. But it’s time for both of us to face the harsh, cold facts, so much colder and more harsh than the winters of your beloved homeland.

Dimitri, my darling, here are the reasons we both know you’re definitely not making it out of Season 4 alive:

1) You’ve got a son to get back to. ROOKIE mistake, my love. I’m frankly astonished at you. And you revealed it RIGHT before the big monster battle? I mean, why don’t you just do a big monologue about how you two are going to open up an awesome rabbit farm when you get home? Do you WANT to die? Baby, I volunteer for a suicide hotline. Next time you feel compelled to confess touching details about yourself the night before you face a deadly threat right at the end of a season arc, call me. We can talk it through. You have so many reasons to live!

And of course, that is why you are going to die.

2) Where is Mikhail’s mom?

Now, this one’s interesting. Arguments COULD be made this could go either way.

The facts are these:

You’ve made zero mention of your wife in all this “reflecting upon our lives as we stare into the gaping maw of death” talk. MAYBE your wife divorced you, and that’s why you don’t like to talk about her. Seems unlikely, given Hop got you to punch him by implying she was disloyal. (Although we can’t rule out the possibility that that remark hit just a little too close to home. Perhaps your drive to be seen as a hero of the Motherland in the eyes of your son stems from a need to demonstrate you are the REAL daddy, a bigger, braver, cooler man than the stepfather his mother left you for? Interesting. We can discuss this again in your next session, Dimitri. That is, if we even do any talking next time . . . I mean, what? Huh? Oh! Right, the thingy. Yeah, sorry, I uh, got distracted by the . . . Nevermind.)

ANYWAY, the much more likely answer is, Mikhail’s mommy is deadzo. You are not only a DILF, you are a hot widower, and the show runners are saving this juicy detail for the inevitable “calm before the coming storm,” beat, the moment just before your heroic sacrifice during the final battle or the crazy escape sequence, when Hop says something cheesy like “You’ve got to rest up. Tomorrow you’re gonna need all your strength to hug that wife and kid of yours.”

And you’ll stare just left of camera with your gorgeous, steely gaze, and you’ll say in your low, haunted voice “I will need strength for only one hug. I am all the family my son has left.”

BOOM. You’re dead. The emotional stakes just got higher and all the Duffer Brothers have to do now is fry ‘em up in the bacon grease of tragic irony and serve them to the audience with a side of mashed dream-potatoes as we weep for you. Now your son is an orphan! And Season 5 has a ready-made cute Russian to bring in and fatten with all our collective emotional investment before the final slaughter. [Fun fact: the third ritual sacrifice of a beloved fictional Russian in a series opens an actual real portal to a hell-dimension in our world!!! The last one opened on January 15, 1968, when the finale of The Man From U.N.C.L.E was broadcast! It was only closed by “chance” when the counter spell was “unwittingly” triggered by casting Armie Hammer as Illya Kuryakin in the GUY RITCHIE directed remake. GUY RITCHIE. Did you know he made a King Arthur Movie?! The Lock, Stock, and Every Movie Jason Statham Has Ever Been in guy. Made a remake of a 60’s tv show and a King Arthur movie with WAY TOO MANY GOD DAMN WIZARDS. Anyway, like I said, luckily the portal was closed, but the things which came from its depths still roam our Earth, seeking raw flesh and fun 60’s fashion accessories. Remember, Ritchie has more dark power and arcane knowledge than he’s letting on, and always wear an ascot or a cute colorful beret when you go out or you will perish horribly!]

Then again, there is a hopeful reading of the no-wife-scenario. MAYBE, dead wife means no strings to hold down the season 5 Enzo romantic D plot. MAYBE they’re leaving you open for more hasty and gratuitous hetero coupling! Doctor Kauffman?! Paging Doctor Kauffman to the set of Stranger Things Season 5! They’re prepping for your close up! And after that, you’re making ST history, they’re setting up to shoot the show’s first sex scene with two adults!!!

[remember when we watched two teens awkwardly fuck while Barb was gruesomely murdered in Season 1? That scene has gotten even LESS comfortable somehow as the actors have aged. You look back and see how young they look compared to now and you’re like “yikes! I know the actors were actually twenty, but please! No more babies fucking, thanks!” Glad they stopped doing that shit. If I had to watch El and Mike fuck I’d hurl, for more reasons than one. LEAVE HER ALONE AND LET HER FIGURE OUT HER SHIT GOD DAMN IT I DON’T NEED TO SEE HER PUNCH MIKE’S V CARD I DON’T CARE THIS ISN’T EUPHORIA ITS A GOD DAMN SCI FI 80’s THROWBACK FUN TIME ABOUT PSYCHIC BABIES!]

So, yeah, no wife could mean free meat for the season five Hetero-pairing meat grinder! There’s hope!

. . . Hope? . . . Who am I kidding? I’m sorry, Dimitri, but this is no time, no world for hope! This is Stranger Things! Do you really think we’re gonna make it out of another season with two new cast members still alive like we did in Season 2? No. No, in the end they killed Billy for his hubris in daring to outlast Bob Newby. All good looking things must end, my dear. Let us kill hope now, before she hurts us again.

3) This Show Fucking Loves Killing Precious Russian Moonbeams [alternatively titled “Are The Duffer Brothers Attempting to Summon The Ravening One From Beyond the 9,000th Eye?!?! Stay Tuned For Season 4 to Find Out!”]

I don’t know if, like, everyone in Russia knows everyone in Russia, but, like, probably not? It looks like a pretty big country on the map. But, Enzy, baby, can I call you Enzy? No? Ok, well, Antonov, sweetheart, do you remember Alexi? He was this really cute, funny, enjoyable Russian sidekick they had last season. We had so much fun with him! At first, we thought he was this bad Russian scientist who was going to help screw over our beloved friends, but in the end, he actually teamed up with them! We all really came to love Alexi! He was kind of a fan favorite! People wrote long, rambling things with a lot of weird jokes in them about him on Tumblr. And then . . .

Sound familiar?

Call me a pessimist, but I just don’t think the Duffer Bros can pass up an opportunity to murder a beloved fictional Russian. Besides, it has been long since the gate was opened. The Ravening One cries out for more tender flesh from our own corporeal plane. Its inessence rumbles, its dark mindlessness bends upon our dimension with all the fell, unfeeling intent and obsession of otherworldly instincts. The Duffer Brothers are thinking of doing a 60’s throwback for their next show, and Guy Ritchie is slated to direct the first seance, I mean episode! . . . Plus they’re like so attentive to details, they’d never kill three Russians on accident! Or forget their birthdays.

Dimitri “Enzo” Nikolai Andronic Niklosky Antonov, we could play this little game of denial, dream this little dream of happiness, torture ourselves a little while longer with what can never be. But neither you nor I are fools. Let us say goodbye now. Let us bid farewell to visions of you doing a really cool group side mission for one or two episodes with Steeve and Eddie and Robin and Nancy and Dustin and Max and El. Let us not cling any longer to fantasies of an episode beat where the adults go out on the town and you and Hopper get in a big bar fight with some assholes who are teasing Joyce and Murray, and you do lots of cool punching to some banging 1987 hit like, I don’t know, RICK ASTLEY’S “NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP?!?!?!” [Did I do it? Does it count as Rick Rolling if it’s in text?]

Let us let go once and for all of our wistful longing for all the dopamine-explosion moments as you interact and bond and integrate with the entire Stranger Things ensemble, the giddy spectacle of novel combination after novel recombination of beloved characters, that heady right of passage of exploring increasingly bizarre pairings and group dynamics all new ST characters who survive their first season are treated to, until the dread Season 5 finale ultimately tears them all assunder as the eldritch gods of the Upsidedown inevitably triumph and wipe all away with one mighty, slimy tendril of inter-dimensional horror.

All I can say, Enzipie, Dimipants, Antobutt, is that it’s been one hell of a ride. You may be just a corrupt guard of some remote, snowy prison in the middle of nowhere, betrayed by his crooked accomplice, imprisoned alongside his former captive, escaped with the aide of unlikely allies, and doomed by the conventions of narrative drama to die, but you melted my heart.

At least we get to keep Eddie! . . . Right? Duffers? DUFFERS?!

TOUCH HIM AND YOU DIE, GOD DAMN IT!!!

*begins sobbing and singing unintelligible Russian dirges while pounding the table rhythmically with fist*