#jfc i need a lobotomy bc i feel like im going ucking crazy sometimes
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heyitslapis · 6 months ago
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The argument of "well people are offended by ANYTHING these days, so thats their fault not mine and i dont have to change my behavior just cause im 'offending them' haha got'cha!" doesnt make any fucking sense to me either bc like. I remember when i was like 13/14, when i had just gotten a tumblr, i used to call girls "chicks" without giving it any thought. it was just a word i was raised hearing. I wasn't doing it in a hateful manner and my goal wasnt to be offensive, but still, someone was uncomfortable with me using that term used to refer to women. I received a simple anon that said "hey do you mind to not use the word "chicks" (when referring to women), it makes me uncomfortable". And you know what? I told the anon no worries and that i'd not say that word from there on out.
It didn't hurt me to find another word, the word wasnt special to me in any way, i didnt take offense to it, because i was unaware that i was causing harm, so its not like it was an attack on my character, and i knew the anon was coming to me for a minuscule, easy to grant request. The word held no real meaning to me, but to someone else, it did, and because i dont want to hurt people on purpose or to have people feel like im not a safe space, i adjusted my behavior AND my vocabulary accordingly. it was no skin off my back, and i was happy to do it because i was able to help someone else feel safe around me/my blog. No, i dont HAVE to cater to peoples requests, and i dont HAVE to change my vocabulary just because someone else has an issue with what i say, but why would i not? it doesnt inconveinece me, it doesnt harm me, its not much extra effort to spend .2 seconds thinking of a different word to use, and that teeny tiny grain-of-sand sized request meant something to the anon who asked it, so why would i argue or fight or piss and moan about a single little word? why is that so hard? why is common courtesy, mutual respect and kindness such a chore to these people? why do you so desperately want to defend your right to be mean and harsh and callous toward people? what do you gain? arent you tired?
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