#jesus this book is so beautiful
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I want what Iris Kelly & Stevie Scott have 😭
#jesus this book is so beautiful#😭😭😭#ugh my heart#book#iris kelly doesn’t date#Iris Kelly#Stevie Scott
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NO ONE TALKS ABOUT THE FIGHT CLUB BOOK ENDING ENOUGH. MY GOD. MY GOD. MY GOD.
#i was shaking#it was so beautiful#i had such a vivid image of Narrators awashed with pure white light as his eyes are glazed over#and all the bruised and battered angels in heaven thanking him. thank you tyler durden#thank you sir.#fight club book#marla singer fight club#tyler durden fight club#fight club#narrator fight club#the narrator fight club#im so ill. my god my dear lord#and this fights into my “Tyler Durden patron saint of Self-Destruction” thing#jesus christ
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Update I FINISHED BUNNY and oh my god what a fucking ride that was
I (as I expected) had to put the book down when I finished it and just sit there in complete silence and stillness to process the story I'd just been through lmao fuuucking hell
#that was a goddamn book and a goddamn half#I'm so disappointed it's over tho#I'd love love love to read more of this terrifying drug trip#unfortunately it does not exist#but my god it was great it was amazing#I can feel it rising now into my top five books ever of all time fucking hell#mona awad#bunny#bunny book#bunny novel#I honestly loved how weird and at times confusing it was#it had all this beautiful meaning and purpose there#but it was also really unique and interesting and shocking and horrifying#and the writing was just so clever#Jesus Christ#I feel like I need to reread it rn to pick up on more stuff
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GOMENS TUMBRL FANDOM HI HELLO I JUST WANTED TO SHARE THAT I AM SO FUCKING HAPPY I LOVE CHRISTMAS IM SO SO HAPPY OHMYGOD IM GONNA CRY
#good omens#gomens#i am so happy#i love life#finally i have my bible in my hands#i can finally rest#my little heart#thank you aziracrow you saved me#what a beautiful book jesus christ#i wanna bite it#and swallow it#and digest it#merry christmas
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a starstruck odyssey is for lovers
#more than acofaf even. the love story of the wurst is what dreams are made of#emilymurph sitting next to each other...skip straightest man ever prince of alien slugs learning to be free bc of the crew...gnosis...#best on average npcs. lucienne plug bambi leroux the butch at the space station fuckin space heiress trust fund baby bajar crunch moon jone#and this is not to say ANYTHING of how good the characters are.#they could keep making d20 seasons forever and starstruck will always be a cut above the rest because of how fucking good the setting is#like with crown of candy even tho i loved it sm i feel like some politics were discarded in favor of the others; all out war was eh to me#the build up to a war tho? now that's interesting that's where the juice is basically i wanted asoiaf book one vibes with this cast but#that's a matter of personal preference! i don't feel like acoc did the most that could've been done with a “politics” campaign#dimension 20#dropout.tv#a starstruck odyssey#because of their deep investment in the world and the genre it never feels like starstruck couldn't do anything. it feels limitless!#season two...god if they never do one that'd be such wasted capability#ik fantasy high is so beloved and it is a beautiful lasagna of time and playing style but if i could get multiple seasons w starstruck...#the thing that makes asoiaf asoiaf is that we have a similar level of insight into the minds of baddies like the lannisters as we do into#the minds of the clean jesus allegory starks. and in acoc the “worst” character we got from the heroes was lapin n even he was aligned#to the rocks' cause. saccharina WAS a rocks -- that was her whole deal -- and even then she wasn't a morally reproachable character bc#she was right! i wanted acoc to be down and dirty and when they said ravening would be i was excited but even that turned out to be them#destroying a secret cult which was going to kill the world. no really down low shenanigans!
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jesus christ today was rough
#cried in a very empty class today when my professor (my major advisor) started taking about the student that passed away#who was also her advisee. not prepared to watch her#remember him and feel his loss. it feels strange to get so emotional because i didn't even really know the guy#like i shouldn't be a part of that grieving process#but seeing my professor break down really really got to me#and i can't stop thinking about it. what a beautiful soul we've lost#not to mention the book that we just finished has so much to do with the loss of children and grief��which she pointed out#and said how much he loved words. loved literature. and that he almost took that class but she felt him there with us anyways.#like fuck. jesus. fuck
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like i genuinely cannot believe thegall that she has quinn saying that oh they loved being servants... really??
[ID: Text reading:
"“I let them go into the front parlor together, and then I went into the kitchen for lunch, where Jasmine was just telling Big Ramona that they were rich. I hated to break up their happiness with my glum looks and I blamed it all on hunger. Besides, Jasmine had always been rich and so was Big Ramona. They just never wanted to leave Blackwood Manor, everybody knew."/end ID]
#twist rambles#vc posting#sorry im so fucking sick of it. 1. set in 1990. 2. she does this w like quite literally EVERY slave character (of which most are barely#prominent characters outside of her using antiblack stereotypes. as im sure u can imagine which one of those a character named big ramona#fits.) and 3. we are really supposed to be on quinns side after it seems he pressured jasmine into sex after using terms such as#“my chocolate candy” “cafe au laut” “milk chocolate” to her. like out loud. we are supposed to like this guy?? like her racism (annes) know#no bounds atp#ask to tag#yeah haha the servants loveee being here lol they dont even need to be paid ^_^ theyre just that rich bc we are some of the GOOD ones. jesu#and this has been going on since the start of the book and just keeps on coming over and over#like not even to get into how all of these esrvants are objectified and jasmine esp is just reduced to a sex object. but the seconddd quinn#sees a white lady hes literally proposing. but jasmine isnt good enough for that in the narratives portrayal of her. its all fucking vile.#i dont want to hear ANYONE say she didnt have horrific handling of race when all this happens in this book and last book had mar.ius#referring to an indian man like he was an animal and had no human qualities. like genuinely i do not think ppl know how bad it is bc most#ppl stop after the first 3 books. and for good reason. anyways good god im so pissed off. my beautiful lj buddy had about 3 paragraphs on#the insane classism she demonstrated last chapter and it rly just keeps continuing to this chapter. like im sorry idc abt how rich quinn is#i need him dead. for many reasons. anyways good god. this book is hell.
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auntie diaries fr gives me chills
#i despise the queer ppl with 0 media literacy who shat on that song all to hell#that meme of missing point. auntie diaries ------> kendrick lamar is transphobic (woosh: kendrick lamar is detailing a story on his#perspective as a black boy in compton learning to accept his trans uncle and cousin#and also detailing his witness of being able to easily see someone disregard gayness and femininity for idealized straight masculinity but#having a much harder time see someone disregard masculinity for degrading femininity (and therefore gayness whether mary ann is gay or not)#but when it came down to it he was able to disregard his biases and stick up for his cousin to a pastor and calling out hypocrisy in the#church like HELLOOOOOOOO did the people criticizing that song even bother to read the lyrics or did they just see red when#kendrick said faggot? are we going to disregard all of the beautiful books and movies in which characters say slurs in a negative light?#at what point does kendrick GLORIFY the use of faggot????? at what point?????? jesus christ there is just NO media comprehension whatsoever#it pisses me off people will always jump at the opportunity to shit on black people while there are PLENTY genuine transphobic (or at least#perpetuating negative stereotypes) media that queers LOVE. why is kendricks genuine retelling of a story where he learns better so gross#to them?
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ough
#just finiahed reading haunting of hill house and have been crying so hard for a half hour i still thibk i might throw up#FOR SOME REASON AFTER SEEING HOW MUCH THEY CHANGED FOR THE SHOW I WAS STILL GUT PUNCHED WITH THE CHOICE THEY DID DECIDE TO KEEP. AND#ITS#YEAH#5stars easy one of the best books ive read ever let alone this year jesus#nel is going to stay in hill house and my heart in ways that are so new and devistating meeting her a second time#i gotta buy a beautiful copy of this book#and then also a cheap one to draw and write and highlight all over#FULL sobs. i have put the book down and cant bring myself to hit the return button for the library because#she. she just wanted to be seen and wanted andD I. CANT CONTRIBUTE TO THE PEOPLE WHO TOLD HER TO LEAVE. NOT YET.#watch me get matching stone lion tattoos for her#jessssus this was a hell of a thing#the show was hard this one was somehow harder#both stunning. obv.#god im gunna have to rewatch and rip myself apart w the easter eggs wont i#later. not yet.#if i think about them being her literal family members too hard my eyeballs will burst out of my head#irl#personal#god the choice to make luke her twin and theo her older sister is going to chew my up inside forever#mike i have several thousand questions would u like to sit down and discuss
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Goddd Thinking about how piranesi has the most gut wrenchingly melancholy ending ever & the like tonal shift between how he talks before & after leaving leaving the house is so overwhelmingly potent it makes me want to scream & cry & throw up. Haunting
#WRITING THAT HURTS YOU. GOD#really the most book ever fucking written I want to explode#he experiences an immeasurable shattering of his world & still conginues to see the beauty& love in everything!!!!! Jesus Christ!!!!!!#he has to reckon with the fact that there’s a person in him he once was & never will be again TWICE & he treats both of them with respwct!!!#& still forgives the betrayal of the other & puts his remains with the rest of the dead because he still has so much love in heart AUGH
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@many-legged
timeline can't hurt me, they're experiencing the horrors together because i think it's fun
#WOWZA!#HOLY CRAP!!!!!!!#this michael shelley design is makinh me. 👁 👁#just like oml hhhi#the disdoortion#mmhm#why is he so pretty here wtfwtfwtgwthdhfgghgb hhhhhhhhi#mnmm.:)#good fucking god the gender every time i look at him he gets better i havent even started talking about gerry yet#the long slender fingers borrowed later by the distortion#the soft and sandy hair#the laugh lines on his face. he did laugh. right?#the lines on his thin cheek you KNOW he pale and scrawny#good god#wow#op. jesus.#gerry im. idk i have no words youre too hot HRRRRK#the knuckle tattoos. the eyebrow piercing. the eyeshadow. the n a i l s.#i just. i am. the. tje#ykw#transition goals#yeah i said it#uhhhh before i run out of tags#the head arc-eye-vist#the goth book collector#the archivees#of course:#the favourited section#this is the most beautiful art ive seen in forever. i think i need a break from tumblr now.#op. this is my last tag. 💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋🚪💋🚪🚪💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋💋🚪🚪💋💋💋 the doors were misclicks but keep em!
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just finished reading the gospel of jesus christ by jose saramago????? wtff im- uh ???? what the actual fuck jose.
#/pos#but my brain is not braining#ugh once again i wish i was smart enough to understand it properly#thd character of the pastor???#mary magdalene?????#her interaction with jesus literally every scene theyre in together is just so beautiful#the way her love is what “saves” jesus and not god#the way judas dies#the way JESUS dies#and dont get me started on jesus and joseph and mary and his family#(dont get me started i say as if I was able to put words next to each other in a way that makes sense)#fun fact once my grandma came over and she saw the book on the coffee table. now my family is catholic.#she saw the title and picked it up curious but not very amused. she flipped it and read (paraphrasing it bc I dont own an english copy)#“when will the day come lord when you will come to us to recognize your mistakes in front of men?"#she put it down horrified#jose saramago#book tag
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“glorious look to him. hed almost have to die young, wouldnt he?”
the pale blue eye
#GOOD GOD#patsy has the best lines in this fucking book#and the movie#like jesus christ#dropping that shit out of NOWHERE#its so beautiful#its so heartbreaking#the pale blue eye
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thinking about jesus in a very non religious way
#i sent this to my gf and she said it sounded like i wanted to fuck him. anyways#been talking to my gf#they're very poetic#write very beautiful poetry with religious symbolism#just. i can't express how much i love her poetry it makes me insane. yall i will never stop hyping her up#very unfortunately she doesn't post it anywhere but one day she will write a poetry book i just know it#ANYWAYS:#we were talking about our perspectives on religion and especially jesus#because we were both raised religious but aren't anymore#and it's just#so many thoughts#so complicated#and so beautiful and ugly and everything all at once#and the poetry. THE POETRY. OUOGOGOHU.#i think jesus is cool#i hope he's doing ok. wherever he is#idk if i believe in him exactly#but#he's just. cool.#i don't necessarily believe in god#but yeah. i just. idk. it's hard to explain#it's cool in theory#i just don't practice the religion#yknow???#anyways#kez.txt#cw christianity#cw religion
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american jesus ☆
spencer reid
part one part two part three
summary; What starts as a seemingly innocent exchange quickly escalates into a game of trust, control, and desire. Spencer offers you more than just financial stability; he gives you attention, adoration, and a connection so intimate it leaves you breathless. From whispered words over the phone to moments of vulnerability, he knows exactly how to unravel you, guiding you to discover sides of yourself you never knew existed.
But with every dollar he deposits into your account and every command that leaves his lips, the boundaries between professionalism and pleasure blur. As you dive deeper into this intoxicating arrangement, you can’t help but wonder: are you just another outlet for his control, or has this brilliant man fallen for you just as deeply as you’ve begun to fall for him?
cw; +18 minors dni, masturbation (f), hints at masturbation (m), nudes, spencer calls reader "little girl" once, phone sex, sugar baby/daddy dynamics, inexperienced reader, pleasure dom spencer, fingering, dirty talk
an; this is the first part in my new series! as always, feedback is greatly appreciated. P.s. this is written with jesus reid in mind <3 xoxo
The idea had been absurd from the beginning—a drunken suggestion tossed out during a late-night study break, your friend’s cheeks flushed from the cheap wine you’d both been sipping.
“You should totally do it,” she’d said, her voice a mix of mischief and daring as she scrolled through her phone. “It’s not like you have to… do anything. Just talk. Flirt a little. Get someone to pay for your coffee—or your rent. What’s the harm?”
You’d laughed it off then, brushing aside her suggestion with a half-hearted joke about the kind of people who used those sites. But now, with your landlord’s polite but insistent emails piling up, along with the crushing weight of tuition bills and credit card debt, her words didn’t seem so laughable.
Desperation, you’d learned, had a way of reshaping your boundaries.
So, against every instinct that told you to slam the laptop shut and find another way, you clicked the link she’d jokingly sent that night.
The homepage was a garish blend of pink and gold, its polished glamour doing little to mask the transactional nature of it all. The tagline—"Where connections are made"—was a cruel euphemism for what this really was: a marketplace. A place where companionship, or at least the illusion of it, had a price tag.
Your fingers hovered over the keyboard for a long time before you finally typed in a username: laceandliterature.
The flood of messages came almost instantly.
@ hungandrich; Hey, beautiful 😘
@ olderseekingyounger; I can show you the world 🌍💎
@ MrNaughty4U; $5k a week to be my princess. No strings attached 💵
It was overwhelming, a cascade of propositions ranging from saccharine to predatory. Some were masked in politeness, others made no effort to conceal their intentions. Your stomach churned as you skimmed through them, the realisation sinking in that you were just another product on a shelf.
And then, just as you were about to close the browser and pretend this had never happened, a new message pinged.
It was short, direct—refreshingly so:
[new chat from: @ thefourthdoctor]
@ thefourthdoctor; Intriguing profile. Shall we talk?
No emojis, no extravagant promises. Just a simple, confident statement.
You hesitated, your heart racing as you clicked on the profile. The picture was blurry, as if taken in haste, but it revealed enough: dark, wavy hair that framed sharp, intelligent eyes behind a pair of glasses. His bio was sparse but intriguing, mentioning books, travel, and a keen interest in "meaningful conversations."
Something about it—about him—felt different. Not just the lack of overtly transactional language, but the quiet assurance in his words.
Your fingers hovered over the keyboard.
This was a bad idea. You knew it was a bad idea. But against your better judgment, you typed out a response.
@ laceandliterature; I suppose that depends on what you want to talk about.
The reply came almost immediately, as if he’d been waiting.
@ thefourthdoctor; Anything but the obvious.
The words were simple, but the subtext was unmistakable: he wasn’t here for what everyone else seemed to want. Or maybe he was just better at hiding it. No sleazy innuendos. No dick pics. No hollow promises of private jets or weekend getaways. Not even the tired clichés of "Hey, gorgeous" or “What’s your body count?”—just a question.
It was startling in its simplicity, almost disarming. And for that exact reason, it made you pause. The absence of the usual vulgarity felt almost like a trick, a trap designed to lure you into a false sense of security. You had learned the hard way to be cautious online. Yet, despite yourself, you couldn’t help but be intrigued.
Your fingers hovered over the keyboard as you glanced at his username again.
A click brought up his profile, your curiosity outweighing your skepticism. The photo was blurry, clearly taken without much thought to lighting or angles. It wasn’t like the polished, professional headshots some of the other profiles sported. Still, you could make out the basics: slightly messy, long curly dark hair, intelligent eyes framed by glasses, and an awkward sort of handsomeness that felt... real.
The bio was brief—almost frustratingly so.
"Bibliophile. Traveler. Interested in meaningful conversations and unconventional connections."
It lacked the arrogance and ostentation of the others you’d scrolled past, the ones who listed their wealth or their penchant for “petite brunettes.” Instead, it was vague, yet oddly specific in its sincerity.
Your chest tightened, a strange mix of apprehension and curiosity tugging at you. Was this calculated, or was it simply honest? And why did it feel more dangerous than the others?
Still, you typed.
Your heartbeat quickened as you debated your next move. The smart thing would be to leave it at that, maybe even block him. After all, you weren’t here for emotional entanglements. This was supposed to be transactional—a simple trade: your time and charm for their money and attention. A means to an end.
Yet, against your better judgment, you stayed.
@ laceandliterature; The obvious is easier to avoid than you think, but meaningful conversations? That’s a tall order here.
There was a long pause, long enough that you started to wonder if you’d misjudged him. But then, the reply came:
@ thefourthdoctor; It depends on who you’re talking to.
You stared at the screen, the simplicity of his words sending a ripple of unease through you. There was no bravado, no performance. He was direct, confident, and—most dangerously—intriguing.
The seconds stretched into minutes as you debated what to say next. This was different from the other messages. He wasn’t dangling wealth in front of you like a shiny object or trying to buy your interest with empty promises.
And yet, the very absence of those things made you wonder what he wanted. Because he wanted something—everyone on this site did. That was the nature of it.
@ laceandliterature; Okay. What do you want to talk about?
His reply was immediate, as if he’d been waiting for you to ask:
@ thefourthdoctor; Tell me what brought you here.
The question hit like a dart, sharp and precise. Your stomach tightened as you read it again, the blunt honesty of it stripping away the thin veil you’d been hiding behind. No one had asked that before—not like this.
Most of the messages you’d received had operated on unspoken rules: you pretend this is normal, and they pretend they’re just being generous. But this man wasn’t pretending. He was asking you to be real in a space built on pretense.
And for reasons you couldn’t quite explain, you felt compelled to answer.
Your fingers trembled slightly over the keyboard. What could you even say? The truth? That you were drowning under the weight of your bills, your student loans, your own stubborn pride? That desperation had led you here, to a website where relationships had price tags and intimacy was commodified?
But what stopped you wasn’t the shame of your situation—it was him. The way he asked, as if the answer mattered. As if you mattered.
The tension in your chest twisted tighter as you typed.
@ laceandliterature; The same thing that brings everyone here, I suppose. Necessity.
You hit send before you could overthink it, before you could soften the edges of the truth. The reply came quickly.
@ thefourthdoctor; Necessity takes many forms. Which is yours?
You stared at the screen, his words pulling something loose inside you. This wasn’t idle curiosity. He was pushing you, peeling back the layers you hadn’t even realized you were wearing. And damn it, you wanted to push back.
@ laceandliterature; Does it matter?
You wrote, the edge in your tone slipping into the words.
The pause before his reply was longer this time, long enough to make you wonder if you’d misstepped. But then it came, and it was nothing you expected.
@ thefourthdoctor; It matters if you want it to.
The simplicity of his words sent a jolt through you, more potent than any overture of wealth or charm could have been. There was no condescension, no judgment. Just quiet, unnerving confidence.
You leaned back in your chair, running a hand through your hair. This wasn’t how this was supposed to go. These conversations were supposed to be easy—shallow exchanges where you could slip into a version of yourself that didn’t feel the weight of real life pressing down on her. But with him, there was no slipping into anything.
He wasn’t letting you.
@ laceandliterature; What about you?
You typed, throwing the question back at him, daring him to offer you the same vulnerability he was asking of you.
@ laceandliterature; Why are you here?
His reply was immediate, almost as if he’d been expecting the question.
@ thefourthdoctor; Curiosity.
You frowned at the screen, the single word both frustrating and enticing. It was vague but deliberate, leaving just enough room for interpretation to keep you hooked.
@ laceandliterature; Curiosity about what?
The next message sent a shiver through you:
@ thefourthdoctor; You.
Your breath caught. One word, and yet it felt like he’d reached through the screen, pulling you closer, tethering you to him in a way that was as exhilarating as it was terrifying.
You hesitated, the heat rising in your cheeks as you considered how to respond. This wasn’t the typical transactional banter you’d anticipated when you signed up. He wasn’t offering money or promises of luxury. He wasn’t trying to seduce you with extravagance. Instead, he was drawing you in with something far more dangerous: attention.
And the worst part? You wanted it.
@ laceandliterature; Careful. That kind of curiosity can be expensive.
This time, the pause felt deliberate, a beat of silence meant to let your words settle. When his reply came, it was sharp, confident, and devastatingly effective.
@ thefourthdoctor; I don’t mind paying for what I value. Isn’t that what this is about, anyway?
Your breath hitched, the implications of his words hitting you like a shockwave. This wasn’t flirtation—it was a proposition. But not the kind you’d grown to expect on this site. He wasn’t offering to buy your time or affection outright; he was telling you that he saw something in you worth pursuing.
And that made him infinitely more dangerous.
Your heart raced as you stared at the screen, torn between the instinct to pull back and the magnetic pull of his presence. This wasn’t just about money anymore. This was about control, power, the careful dance of who would give and who would take.
You sat frozen, his last message glowing on the screen like an unspoken dare.
"I don’t mind paying for what I value."
The words reverberated through you, sharp and calculated, leaving no room for misinterpretation. This wasn’t a line meant to charm or impress. It was a statement of intent—a declaration of control.
And it was working.
Your chest tightened as you typed, your fingers moving before your brain caught up.
@ laceandliterature; Value is subjective.
The moment you hit send, you regretted it. It felt flippant, like you were trying to undermine the weight of his words. But maybe that was exactly what you needed to do—to wrest back some semblance of control in this conversation that was starting to feel far too intimate.
The reply came after a pause that felt excruciatingly long:
@ thefourthdoctor; It is. But I’m a man who knows how to discern.
Your throat tightened, the confidence in his words striking a chord deep within you. He wasn’t just playing the game—he was setting the rules. And despite yourself, you found it maddeningly enticing.
@ laceandliterature; Discernment is rare here.
You replied, leaning into the dynamic, testing the boundaries of this strange connection.
His next message came faster this time, as if he’d been waiting for you to lean in:
@ thefourthdoctor; So is honesty. Tell me, how rare are you?
Your breath hitched, your cheeks flushing as you stared at the question. It wasn’t what you expected—not here, not from someone you’d never met. And yet, it was the kind of question you couldn’t dismiss with a coy quip or vague answer.
@ laceandliterature; Enough to know my worth.
You typed, surprising even yourself with the boldness of your response.
His reply came swiftly.
@ thefourthdoctor; Good. Then you’ll understand why I won’t insult you with empty offers. Tell me what you want.
Your pulse quickened. There it was—the shift you’d been waiting for, the moment the conversation turned from hypothetical to concrete. But this was different from the others. He wasn’t throwing numbers at you, wasn’t dangling luxury in front of you like bait. He was putting the power in your hands, asking you to decide the terms.
It was intoxicating. And terrifying.
Your fingers hovered over the keyboard, a thousand thoughts racing through your mind. What did you want? Money was the obvious answer—wasn’t it? That was why you were here in the first place. But now, with him, it didn’t feel so simple.
@ laceandliterature; That depends… What are you offering?
The pause before his response was agonizing, each second stretching longer than the last. And then it came:
@ thefourthdoctor; Time. Money. Attention. Answers, if you’re brave enough to ask the right questions.
Your breath caught, the weight of his words settling over you like a heavy cloak. He wasn’t offering material things, at least not yet. He was offering something far more valuable—and far more dangerous.
You swallowed hard, your palms damp as you considered your next move. He’d shifted the power dynamic yet again, pulling you deeper into a game you weren’t entirely sure you knew how to play.
@ laceandliterature; And what do you want in return?
The question leaving you more vulnerable than you cared to admit.
His response was immediate, his words a quiet, commanding echo in your mind:
@ thefourthdoctor; Exactly what you’re willing to give me.
The simplicity of his answer hit you harder than any declaration of wealth or desire could have. It wasn’t just about money or power or control—it was about you. Your choices, your limits, your willingness to engage in this careful, intoxicating dance.
And that realisation sent a shiver down your spine.
For a moment, you stared at the screen, your pulse thrumming in your ears. You could walk away now. Close the laptop, block his profile, and pretend this never happened. But the truth was, you didn’t want to.
Because for the first time since you’d joined this site, you felt seen. Not as an object, not as a commodity, but as a person.
His words clung to you, each syllable daring you to define what you were prepared to offer. He was turning the mirror back on you, forcing you to confront not just the situation but yourself.
Your fingers hovered over the keyboard, unsure of how to proceed. He wasn’t playing by the rules you expected, and that made him unpredictable. Dangerous. But it also made him irresistible.
@ laceandliterature; That’s a clever way of saying nothing. Ambiguity suits you.
The reply came quickly, almost as if he’d anticipated your deflection.
@ thefourthdoctor; Clarity can be earned, if you’re willing to play the game.
Your breath hitched. There it was again—that quiet, assured confidence that pulled you in despite every warning bell ringing in your head. He wasn’t offering platitudes or empty promises. He was offering a challenge, one that was as maddening as it was magnetic.
@ laceandliterature; And what game is that?
The pause before his answer felt deliberate, a calculated silence that only heightened your anticipation. When his message finally appeared, it sent a shiver through you:
@ laceandliterature; The one we’re already playing. You just haven’t realised it yet.
Your pulse quickened, your palms damp as you stared at the screen. He was toying with you, but not in the way you’d experienced before. This wasn’t about cheap thrills or transparent power plays. This was about control—subtle, seductive, and entirely in his hands.
@ laceandliterature; I don���t recall agreeing to any rules.
The sharpness of your words masking the unease curling in your chest.
His reply was swift, the confidence in his words cutting through the haze of your thoughts:
@ thefourthdoctor; You didn’t have to. You agreed the moment you responded.
The audacity of his statement left you momentarily breathless. He was right, of course, and that infuriated you. But it also thrilled you in a way you couldn’t quite explain.
@ laceandliterature; You’re awfully sure of yourself
You shot back, your fingers trembling as you hit send. The response came almost immediately.
@ thefourthdoctor; Confidence is the privilege of knowing what you want. Do you?
Your chest tightened, his words striking a nerve you hadn’t expected. What did you want? It was supposed to be simple—a means to an end, a way to solve your financial problems without complicating your life. But now, with him, it felt far from simple.
You hesitated, your mind racing. This wasn’t like the other conversations you’d had on this site. He wasn’t just offering money or gifts; he was offering an exchange of a different kind. One that blurred the lines between power and vulnerability, control and surrender.
@ laceandliterature; I think you already know the answer.
@ thefourthdoctor; Good. Then we’re getting somewhere.
You exhaled sharply, the tension in your chest both exhilarating and suffocating. He had you cornered, and he knew it. But the worst part? You didn’t want to leave.
@ laceandliterature; And where exactly is that?
The question both a challenge and a plea. His response sent a chill down your spine.
@ thefourthdoctor; Where we figure out if you’re ready to trust me.
The weight of his words settled over you, heavy and inescapable. Trust. It was a loaded word, especially here, in a space where every interaction felt transactional. But with him, it didn’t feel like a demand—it felt like an invitation.
You swallowed hard, your fingers trembling as you typed your response:
@ laceandliterature; Trust is earned, Doctor. How do you plan on earning mine?
The pause before his reply was excruciating, every second stretching longer than the last. And then, finally, his message appeared.
@ thefourthdoctor; Patience. Honesty. And just enough mystery to keep you coming back.
Your breath caught, the sheer confidence of his words leaving you momentarily speechless. He wasn’t just playing the game—he was rewriting the rules, pulling you deeper into his orbit with every word.
And despite the warning bells ringing in your head, you couldn’t stop yourself from wanting more.
@ laceandliterature; Then I suppose we’ll see how well you play.
@ thefourthdoctor; We already are.
The message lingered on the screen, a challenge and a promise all at once. And as you stared at it, your heart racing and your mind spinning, one thing became clear:
Here’s the continuation, intensifying the emotional and psychological stakes, as well as the power dynamics:
You could feel it in the way your heart raced, in the way your mind struggled to pull together coherent thoughts. It was maddening. Dangerous. And yet, some part of you craved the thrill of it.
@ laceandliterature; What makes you so sure of that?
@ thefourthdoctor; Because you’re still here.
Your lips parted in a soft exhale, the truth in his words sending a shiver down your spine. He was right—you were still here, still engaged, still drawn to him in a way you couldn’t quite explain.
@ laceandliterature; Maybe I’m just curious.
His response was immediate, his confidence unshaken.
@ thefourthdoctor; Curiosity is the first step to surrender. And you’re closer than you think.
Your pulse quickened, his words striking a nerve you hadn’t realized was exposed. Surrender. The word hung there, heavy and intoxicating, pulling you deeper into his web.
@ laceandliterature; Surrender isn’t in my vocabulary.
The sharpness of your reply more for your benefit than his.
@ thefourthdoctor; That’s because no one’s ever taught you how to do it properly.
The breath left your lungs in a quiet rush, your body betraying you with a thrill that raced down your spine. He wasn’t just confident—he was audacious, pushing boundaries you didn’t even know you had.
@ laceandliterature; And you think you’re the one to teach me?
@ thefourthdoctor; I know I am.
Your throat tightened, his certainty pulling you further into the undertow. There was no pretence with him, no fumbling for the right words to impress or seduce. He spoke with a quiet authority that was impossible to ignore—and even harder to resist.
@ laceandliterature; You’re awfully sure of yourself, Doctor.
You wrote, the name a deliberate choice, a way to remind yourself that he was still just a man on the other side of a screen.
But his next message stripped away any illusion of simplicity.
@ thefourthdoctor; Confidence is earned. You’ll see.
The promise in his words sent your mind reeling, the tension in your chest building with every passing second. He wasn’t offering wealth or gifts or superficial praise. He was offering himself—his attention, his intellect, his dominance—and it was unlike anything you’d ever encountered.
You leaned back in your chair, running a hand through your hair as you tried to steady your breathing. This wasn’t just a game anymore. It was a collision of wills, a power struggle where the stakes felt dangerously personal.
@ laceandliterature; And if I decide to stop playing?
His reply came slower this time, each word calculated, precise.
@ thefourthdoctor; Then I’ll let you go. But we both know you won’t.
Your breath caught, the quiet confidence in his message leaving you stunned. He wasn’t trying to trap you—he was daring you to walk away. And that made him even more dangerous.
@ laceandliterature; You seem very sure of my choices
@ thefourthdoctor; I’m sure of your curiosity. And that’s enough.
You stared at the screen, your heart pounding, your mind spinning. He was right—you were curious. About him, about this, about where it could lead. And that curiosity was already pulling you deeper, binding you to him in a way that felt both thrilling and terrifying.
And as you sat there, your fingers hovering over the keyboard, one thought echoed in your mind:
You weren’t just playing his game anymore.
You were losing.
His words were a masterstroke, the kind of deliberate confidence that didn’t demand submission but invited it, coaxed it out of you with unsettling precision. He wasn’t forcing you into anything. He didn’t have to.
You were leaning in all on your own.
@ laceandliterature; Curiosity is dangerous.
The words meant as both a warning and a defense. You weren’t sure if you were telling him or reminding yourself.
His reply came almost instantly, as if he’d anticipated your hesitation.
@ thefourthdoctor; It can be, in the wrong hands. But I think you know by now—I don’t intend to hurt you.
Your chest tightened, the unexpected gentleness in his response catching you off guard. It wasn’t a dismissal of your fears; it was an acknowledgment, a reassurance that felt disarmingly genuine.
@ laceandliterature; What do you intend to do, then?
The pause before his reply was deliberate, stretching just long enough to heighten the tension without breaking it.
@ thefourthdoctor; Challenge you. Teach you. Protect you, if you let me.
Your breath hitched, his words striking a chord deep within you. The power in his offer wasn’t in its force but in its certainty, its quiet promise of control without cruelty, dominance without destruction.
@ laceandliterature; That’s a tall order.
@ thefourthdoctor; I’ve never been afraid of a challenge.
The simplicity of his answer left you momentarily stunned. He wasn’t boasting, wasn’t trying to impress you. He was stating a fact, one that resonated with an authority you couldn’t ignore.
@ laceandliterature; And what do you get out of this?
@ thefourthdoctor; The pleasure of watching you grow. The satisfaction of knowing you’re safe. And maybe, if you’re willing, a connection worth more than either of us expected.
Your chest tightened, his words threading through the cracks in your defences with startling ease. He wasn’t just offering a transaction; he was offering something far deeper, something that terrified and intrigued you in equal measure.
@ laceandliterature; You make it sound so simple.
@ thefourthdoctor; It can be, if you trust me. But I won’t rush you. This is your choice.
Your breath caught, the weight of his words settling over you. He wasn’t demanding anything from you, wasn’t using manipulation or coercion. He was giving you the space to decide, to choose whether to step into the unknown or retreat to the safety of your walls.
@ laceandliterature; What if I don’t know how to trust someone like you?
@ thefourthdoctor; Then I’ll show you how, baby. Step by step. But only if you’re willing.
The kindness in his words was a stark contrast to the intensity of his presence, a reminder that his control wasn’t about overpowering you—it was about guiding you, supporting you, meeting you where you were and pulling you gently forward.
@ laceandliterature; And if I’m not?
@ thefourthdoctor; Then I’ll let you go. But I don’t think you want me to.
The truth in his words hit you like a jolt, your heart racing as you stared at the screen. He was right—you didn’t want to let him go. You didn’t want to retreat into the safety of solitude, not when he was offering something so intoxicatingly rare.
@ laceandliterature; You’re very sure of yourself
@ thefourthdoctor; I’m sure of you. And I’m willing to wait until you are too.
The words lingered on the screen, a challenge and a reassurance all at once. He wasn’t just pulling you into his world—he was offering to walk beside you, to guide you through the uncharted territory of trust and surrender.
And as you stared at his message, your pulse thrumming in your ears, one thing became abundantly clear. You wanted to see where this could lead.
Your fingers trembled as you typed your reply.
@ laceandliterature; I don’t know where this is going.
His response came swiftly, his dominance tempered by kindness:
@ thefourthdoctor; Then let me be the one to show you. One step at a time.
When the evening settled and the quiet of your room enveloped you, you found yourself sitting on the edge of your bed, staring at your phone. His last message still lingered there:
"Then let me be the one to show you. One step at a time."
Trust. The word had seemed so monumental when he’d said it, and now it felt even heavier in the quiet intimacy of your room.
Your eyes wandered to the package on your desk, the one that had arrived just days ago. The lingerie you’d bought with the money he’d sent—not something you’d ever imagined doing, much less showing anyone. But his insistence had stayed with you.
"This is for you," he’d written. "Because you deserve to feel special."
You’d laughed at the time, unsure how to process the sincerity in his words. But now, with the soft lace spread out in front of you, you felt the weight of his kindness.
On impulse, you slipped it on, the delicate fabric hugging your body in a way that felt both indulgent and empowering. It wasn’t something you’d ever have bought for yourself, but now, wearing it, you understood the quiet confidence it offered.
You caught your reflection in the mirror, your cheeks flushing as you adjusted the straps. The blush-colored lace was intricate and feminine, the perfect balance of modesty and allure. You hesitated, biting your lip as your phone buzzed in your hand.
Finally, you snapped a photo—nothing overly revealing, just the curve of your body hinted at in the soft light, the lace framing your figure. It felt daring, intimate, and, most of all, you felt like his.
With a shaky breath, you typed a caption for the image.
@ laceandliterature; Thank you. I thought you should see where your funds are going.
You hit send before you could second-guess yourself, your heart racing as the message left your screen.
@ thefourthdoctor; You’re so beautiful, my little angel.
Your breath caught at the simplicity of his words. There was no embellishment, no flourish—just a quiet, sincere acknowledgment that made your chest tighten.
Another message followed, slower this time, as if he’d chosen each word carefully.
@ thefourthdoctor; Thank you for trusting me with this. How does it make you feel?
His question sent a ripple of warmth through you. He wasn’t just admiring you; he cared about how you felt, ensuring that this moment wasn’t just for him.
@ laceandliterature; It feels… different. In a good way.
The dots danced on the screen before his next message appeared.
@ thefourthdoctor; Good. That’s exactly how it should feel. You deserve to feel confident and cared for.
You smiled despite yourself, the warmth of his words cutting through the lingering nerves. He had a way of making you feel seen, like every action, every choice you made mattered to him.
@ laceandliterature; I wasn’t sure about sending it, I’ve never done anything like that before.
You admitted, your honesty surprising even you.
@ thefourthdoctor; You don’t need to worry. You’re safe with me. Always.
The reassurance in his words settled something deep inside you. He wasn’t just saying it—he meant it, every word carrying the weight of his sincerity.
Before you could respond, your phone vibrated in your hand, his name lighting up the screen. You hadn't expected him to call so soon, but the smile that spread across your face at the sight of his name felt entirely natural.
Your throat pinched, the air suddenly feeling all too warm. Neither of you had ever initiated a call before, what would he sound like? Deciding to push your nerves to the side, you answer the call.
"I was thinking you might not pick up for a moment there," his voice was low and smooth, a hint of amusement dancing through his words. "I hope you know this isn’t just about the photo. It’s about you. What you need, what you want. If you’re ever unsure, tell me. I’ll always listen."
"I guess I just couldn’t help myself," you teased, a slight blush creeping up your cheeks at the memory of how vulnerable you'd felt.
"Yeah? Am I living up to the expectation?" he murmured, and you could hear the laughter in his voice. It wasn’t a mocking sort of amusement, just a quiet acknowledgment that you both knew where this conversation was heading. And that, he hoped, neither one of you would shy away from it.
You laughed, a softness you'd never known you were capable of settling into your chest. There had been something so unexpectedly freeing about the experience—about wearing it made you flush with warmth.
“You could say that…”
“What were you hoping for, when you sent me that photo?”
The thought sent an immediate ache through your body, the suggestion of his touch, of the things he might do to you, sending a wave of desire through you. Your mind raced with images of “him” above you, of his hands pinning your wrists to the bed as he thrust into you. The thought was enough to make you flush, the ache of need between your legs becoming almost unbearable.
"Nothing.” You couldn’t even pretend to feign nonchalance when his words had been so unflinchingly honest, when the promise of what lay ahead was so tantalisingly clear.
"I’ll make it easier for you, then. What are you thinking about right now?" he said bluntly, his words sending a rush of heat through your entire body. There was nothing ambiguous or hesitant about his command; he wanted this, and he expected you to do it. "Tell me what you want, angel. I can give you that."
You twist the fabric hem of the lingerie around your fingers nervously, chewing at the dry skin on the edge of your lips. “I- I don’t know how to do this.”
He chuckles softly, voice still full of kindness. “Then you don’t have to do anything, let me do all the work, baby.”
You’re quiet for a moment, pondering your options. Before nodding to yourself, deciding you’d have to let go of your nerves for the time being if you wanted this to continue.
“Okay.” You whisper, almost inaudibly. He wouldn’t have been able to hear it if he’d not been paying such close attention.
You took a deep breath, feeling a surge of boldness. "I... I've always had this fantasy of being guided by a man... someone who knows what he wants and can show me new pleasures. I’ve never had that chance before… I was hoping maybe that could be you."
"Oh, angel, you have no idea how much I want to fulfil those desires," He purred. "I can be your guide, your teacher, and your lover all in one."
His words sent a jolt of electricity through your body, and you felt your core tighten with anticipation. "I... I think I'd like that very much."
"I want you to relax and get comfortable for me, can you do that, baby?. Dim the lights, light a candle, whatever you need to do."
Obeying his instructions, you lit a scented candle, filling the room with a soft, flickering glow and a hint of vanilla. You kicked off your shoes and slid under the covers, your heart pounding in your chest.
"That's it, sweet girl," He whispered. "Now, I want you to imagine my hands on your body, caressing your skin, exploring every inch of you. Feel my touch, soft and gentle, as I trace your collarbone, down to the swell of your breasts."
As you listened, you closed your eyes, visualising his strong, masculine hands on your body. You imagined his fingers brushing against your sensitive nipples, causing them to harden in response. Soft whimpers escaping your lips as you reach up to cup your breasts, mimicking his touch.
"That's right, angel," he encouraged. "Touch yourself for me. Feel how soft you are, how sweet.”
Your fingers obeyed, teasing your nipples, rolling and tugging at the sensitive peaks. You arched your back, pressing your breasts into your palms, and let out a soft cry of pleasure.
"Do you like that, little girl?" He asked, his voice thick with desire. "I wish you could see what you do to me."
"Yes, Doctor," you breathed, your voice heavy with arousal. “It feels so good."
"Now, slide your hand down your stomach, past your navel, and into the heat between your thighs," he instructed, his voice a seductive command. "Feel how wet you are for me, how your body responds to my words."
Your hand trembled as you obeyed, slipping beneath the covers and finding your way to your core. Your fingers brushed against your wet folds, and you gasped at the sensation.
"Oh, god, baby. You're so wet, aren’t you? I can hear it," He growled. "Rub your fingers along your pussy, coat them with your sweetness.”
You did as he said, moaning as your fingers slipped into your tight cunt. You were so wet, so ready, and the sensation of filling yourself sent waves of pleasure through your body. Taking the phone down your body, you hold it in front of your dripping pussy. Your microphone picking up on the sounds as your fingers slip through your folds.
"What a noisy fucking pussy, that's it, that's my girl," he encouraged. "Fuck yourself with your fingers, slowly at first, imagine it's my cock inside you, claiming your tight little cunt."
Your fingers moved in and out, your pace increasing as your pleasure spiralled. You imagined Spencer's thick, hard length filling you, his powerful body driving into yours.
"Yeah, fuck yourself for me," he urged. "Let go, angel girl. Come for me, and let me hear your sweet cries."
Your fingers worked frantically, your body on the brink of ecstasy. His words, his deep, commanding voice, pushed you over the edge. With a cry of release, you climaxed, your body trembling as waves of pleasure washed over you.
"Oh, my sweet girl," he whispered, whispering soft praise over the phone, his voice filled with satisfaction. "That sounded like a lot, hm? You still with me, beautiful?."
"I know that wasn’t easy for you, but it was beautiful to hear." His voice was soft, filled with sincerity.
You lay there, breathless and sated, your body still humming with pleasure. "Y-yeah, m still here. Thank you."
"You did so good, such a well behaved girl. Check your phone for me, baby. Look what you did to me."
You froze for a moment, your mind struggling to process exactly what you were looking at. And then it registered—the smooth skin of his stomach, the slight curve of his hip. A moment later, you saw it; his cock, flushed pink tip, half-hard and resting against his stomach. A small pool of cum rested near his belly button.. You flushed all over at the thought, but you couldn’t tear your eyes away from the photo. There was something so undeniably intimate about the image; something that spoke to the fact that he'd been pleasuring himself while thinking of you.
With a final, breathless goodbye, you end the call. Your heart is still racing, your body tingling with the lingering aftershocks of pleasure. His voice still echoes in your ears, warm and commanding, and the weight of his presence seems to fill the room even though he's no longer on the line. You lean back against the soft cushions on your bed, eyes fluttering closed, letting the soft glow of the lamp wash over you.
You let out a slow exhale, your chest rising and falling in rhythm with the buzz still pulsing beneath your skin. There’s something thrilling, intoxicating about the way he’s able to draw you out, make you vulnerable and yet so sure of yourself all at once. But the moment feels almost too surreal, too indulgent, and you try to calm your racing thoughts when a ping breaks through the haze of your afterglow.
You glance down at your phone, blinking at the notification that has just popped up.
$500 has been deposited into your account.
-for my pretty girl
Your breath catches in your throat as your fingers instinctively swipe open the message. You freeze, your eyes scanning the details with a quickness that betrays your curiosity.
"Doctor Reid," it reads, alongside the substantial amount.
For a moment, time seems to stop, your gaze fixed on the screen as your pulse quickens once more. The money sits there, cool and impersonal, yet its presence is anything but. It’s a gesture—one that feels undeniably generous, but also loaded with unspoken meaning. This isn’t just a transaction. This is him, and everything that came with the promise of his control, his attention, his care.
You’ve known that he was willing to give, but this—this feels different. The amount is so much more than what you’d expected. What did he mean by it? What does he expect now?
You glance at the digits one more time, the weight of his name anchoring the moment. It feels strange to see it. So he was a doctor.
A tight knot forms in your chest, mixing nerves with something else—something like desire, maybe even gratitude. You bite your lip, unsure how to feel. It was just a phone call, just a moment of shared vulnerability between you. Yet the fact that he’s followed through with this kind of gesture makes everything feel so much more real, so much more complicated.
With a heavy sigh, you set your phone down and run your fingers through your hair, your mind racing as you try to reconcile the thrill of the moment with the heavy responsibility that now feels like it’s creeping in.
At least now you had his name, Doctor Reid.
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
#missarchive#spencer reid x reader#bau x reader#spencer reid#spencer reid fic#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid smut#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds
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i’m sorry to say that i am not enjoying normal people by sally rooney even just a little bit
#straight people read this and think it’s a great portrayal of romance and that is exactly why they have the kind of problems they do 😭#it’s actually so insufferable i’m so upset rn#like….273 pages of connell being an anxious wreck and barely dealing with it#and marianne being so self destructive that i even start to feel a sick sense of worthlessness#and i get it i guess that’s the beauty of the book and why they are ‘normal people’ but#jesus fucking fuck#like when does it END 😭#i feel bad saying this but truly when is it over like i never want them to see each other ever again#they need serious healing and again#i know i sound like the worlds biggest hypocrite given my YEARS of self loathing and destruction#but even i…..even i have a breaking point#and this book is smashing me to PIECES
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