#jesus imagine having that glitch in your system

[void-bitten-ghost]

Look okay if anyone has a right to be scared of the dark it's the bubbly sunshaped daycare worker in fnaf security breach that literally loses their sense of self when the lights go out like

That is terrifying to think about

[septembriseur]

You guys know that I’m back to working on Transposition. But it is, frankly, a challenge, and I feel a lot of pressure to put something out there and prove that the story will be finished. So I’m posting what is essentially some AU tidbits, because it’s a draft of part of Chapter 52 that I threw out and totally reconceptualized. It is not particularly good, but here it is!

Telford trades the tel’tak to a junk dealer in the P3S-805 system and ends up in a ratty little cobbled-together half-Kerobottri exoship that shakes when you try to engage its makeshift FTL drive, but, hey, it comes with no questions asked. And it’s not like he has any reason to be picky; he’s just trying to get a couple of gate-trips ahead of Kiva’s people before he finds a spaceport and settles down to get drunk.

The place he ends up in is a shithole clustered around the North Pole of a medium-sized planet in the Formalhaut Debris Ring, about twenty-two light years from Earth. It’s a frozen, sandy desert with a dozen tiny speckling moons above it, and not a single building more than three stories tall. It caters to frack miners running hot crews through the debris ring, which the LA’s First and Second House periodically squabble over, and the occasional Goa’uld war criminal hoping to lay low. That makes it a good place for Telford, even if the liquor is shitty. So he hauls out some of the raw data crystals that he stripped off the Sixth House tel’tak and pays enough to dock his ship, then keeps paying until the barkeeper at the watering hole hands over the bottle.

It’s whatever the latest thing is that the Lucian kids are cooking up out of kassa. It doesn’t really taste like anything; just like ethanol and antiseptic. He hunkers down in his ship and knocks the stuff back without a chaser. And again. And then again. For a while, grimly determined, that’s all he does: limiting his world to the fumes that he breathes out, and the back of his throat, where the mucous membrane is burning.

He doesn’t have a jacket anymore, but he’s got what the bounty hunter threw in with the exoship: a couple of Himalayan-looking blankets made out of knotted-up fibers, and a hooded coat lined with some kind of animal fur. So he puts the coat on, and, after a while, the hood too, then drags one of the blankets over his shoulders and breathes into his cupped hands. He can smell the coat’s earthy leather, and whatever it is that fur smells like. The air smells like naquadah and ozone. He looks out over the bulks of the ships, great beasts sleeping in the desert on every side of the outpost-city, some as tall as the buildings and twice as big. The dim light of the sun, filtered through dust clouds, glints off the shinier of their surfaces, along with the occasional scattered fleck of a moon. They’re like shrapnel wounds, that spray of moons— not quite regular enough to be strafe-marks, but deep enough that you can see the inside of whatever it is that was punctured.

He takes another abrupt swig of the liquor.

He thinks his first step should be to take stock of what he has left. The Hemingway is gone now, and the Dostoevsky. The— assorted personal knickknacks that he hadn’t needed anyway. He took enough shit off the tel’tak to last him a little while if he barters, but when he’d made his elaborate back-up plans, he always assumed he’d be leaving from Earth. So he hasn’t got a whole hell of a lot of assets out here in deep space. He can always sell intel, but that comes with the risk of someone back-tracing the information. Or he can take the sensible option and just turn mere. It’s what a lot of guys did on Earth, anyway, after they’d left the service, if they’d gotten deep in debt or just couldn’t fit in.

He’d tried to imagine it himself, when he was younger: leaving the service. Retiring. Consulting. Security. A house, a car, a wife, a couple of kids. On some level that language didn’t reach down to, the thought had always repelled him. He’d thought that if he tried it, he would end up like one of those guys you heard about who just went missing, just up and walked away from their lives one day. They turned up twenty years later running a tackle shop off the coast of Alaska, or flying prop planes in the South Pacific, or else they didn’t turned up, and stayed question marks forever, strangers who had sealed whatever secret they carried so well inside them that they had taken it, totally unknown, to their graves.

It was possible to do that. It wasn’t a failure. Maybe it even meant that you’d won. Whatever was inside you, you’d kept it: pure and unsullied, a hard bright crystal, a fuel you could burn. It was uncontaminated and yours forever.

He can feel it inside him now: a pain in the region of his chest, close to but not exactly contiguous with the heart.

He drinks and watches cosmic dust catch the amber glow of the distant sunlight.

A cold wind shifts and rattles the sand.

***

An ice storm in the morning, with no rain: only hailstones rattling like pebbles against the walls of the exoship. He wakes from a restless sleep still wrapped in fur and heavy blankets. He feels like God has picked up the box he’s hiding in and shaken it right next to His ear to hear if anything left inside still scuttles. He thinks about Rush explaining Wittgenstein’s beetle. There is something alive in us, though it may be a very singular creature. It may not be what other people thought— hoped— it was.

Still. Something scuttles. Insect legs against the siding.

He erases his travel history in the ship’s computer and swallows down another couple fingers of kassa liquor for breakfast, tunelessly humming Mahler under his breath, then throws it up an hour later courtesy of his hangover.

When he stands, he sees starbursts against the array of evening. It’s not really evening, of course; there’s not really night or day, this close to the magnetic pole of a planet, unless you count the constant half-dim polar twilight. One long night lasting half a year, deranging the little rock’s temporalities like every other kind of measurement was deranged by the location. Get too close to the axis of something, and you lose all sense of how to chart it.

He’s familiar with the problem.

***

Ships come and go like fireflies in a summer time-lapse, their engines burning off into the dusk.

It’s fall on Earth, he guesses. So: no more fireflies, which: fuck ‘em, anyway. They only last a few months before they’re done. Like humans, when seen from an Ascended perspective. Little chips of mica; little specks of dust. You could lose a fistful and not notice, so why should they matter?

He thinks of Rush sinking his hands in the floor up to the wrists, as though he could reach down and reclaim the mineral flecks trapped there for eons. As though the whole universe were just water, none of it yet set in stone around him.

It should’ve been me, Telford thinks. It should’ve been me who—

But he hadn’t had the genes.

Always something missing.

***

He doesn’t speak English out here. He speaks the degraded Babylonian of Sixth House. Or at least that’s what Jackson had always said it was— the bastard child of Akkadian and Aramaic, mixed with the Hebrew dialects of the Asar planets, sort of like what might have happened if the Babylonian Empire still existed. He’d had to learn it from scratch when he went undercover the first time, in case the translation matrix ever encountered a glitch. It was hard work, but he was good at it, at least according to Jackson. Jackson had seemed faintly surprised; Telford had said, “You thought I’d be as dumb as a brick.” “No,” Jackson had said, but his eyes had slid guiltily away. Telford had smirked, grimly pleased by the implied admission. Jackson had said, too hurriedly, “I didn’t. II wasn’t surprised because— I mean, I wasn’t alluding to— obviously that’s not what I meant.”

What he’d meant didn’t interest Telford. At forty-two years old, he’d had every version of that conversation, the one that was all ellipses. The last thing he wanted was to rehash them again with fucking Jackson. So, instead, he’d said, “Aramaic in space. Doesn’t it ever make you wonder?”

Jackson had looked uncomfortable. He’d adjusted his glasses with both hands. “Wonder what?”

“Oh, don’t play coy with me. If Jesus was— you know.”

“Extraterrestrial, you mean? A Goa’uld? The idea’s been floated.”

“And?”

They’d been sitting in an empty conference room, waiting for some meeting to start; it had been late, Telford thinks now, or very early; there had been this hush, like sound was suppressed. Sometimes late at night there, he’d feel like he was under the ocean: the pressure deforming his eardrums, till all he could hear was the rush of his own blood. Jackson had toyed with a pencil, balancing it on the side of one finger. Unbidden, Telford had been reminded of the Egyptian scale of justice, where your heart was weighed against a feather after you were dead. The image had seemed apt; Daniel, he’d thought, what a fan-fucking-tastic Eternal Judge you’d make, sitting there with your schoolboy pout and your moralizing.

Without looking up, Jackson had said, “Oh, I don’t know. Not really the Goa’uld modus operandi, is it?”

“No? Render unto Caesar what is Caesar’s; forget about getting what you deserve, and God’s going to magically provide you with loaves and fishes?”

“That seems like a very thin interpretation of the Gospels.”

Telford had half-laughed incredulously. “You’re going to come over all Christian on me, Jackson?”

Jackson flattened his pout out into a thin line. “I hardly think it has to be Christian to suggest that the impulse behind one of Earth’s major religions, and a full interpretation of its sacred texts, is about more than just the redistribution of resources.”

“So— what, then?” Telford moved restlessly in his chair.

“Divine justice,” Jackson said. He had the air of someone offering a challenge. “The idea that there’s something beyond us, some truth, some ultimate harmony or knowledge. Something that we’re a part of, if we want to be— if we want to be good.”

Telford had felt incredulous. “Knowledge,” he’d repeated. “Ultimate knowledge.”

“You don’t think that’s what God is? Knowledge?” Jackson seemed genuinely curious. His forehead was furrowed.

“Well,” Telford said, “for starters, I don’t think God is good.”

“I can’t tell you how amazed I am to hear it.” Jackson’s mouth gained a sad quirk. He looked down, at where the pencil was perfectly balanced on his finger. “So: not harmonious, but maybe— maybe still knowledge.”

Telford had shaken his head— slowly at first, and then faster, like a round of sardonic applause building. “Don’t get me wrong, Jackson— I know you’ve been a floating space octopus of pure light and shit, and gotten the sublime wisdom of the Ancients, but to paraphrase a much wiser man than myself: kid, I’ve flown from one side of this galaxy to the other, and I’ve seen a lot of strange stuff, but I’ve never seen anything to make me believe that all I need is more information, like a giant celestial textbook is going to make it all make sense.”

“That wasn’t what I meant,” Jackson said.

But he looked hurt; stung, somehow. His face had closed off. He curled his fist around the pencil. Telford had felt a brief surge of triumph; he liked defeating Jackson. At the same time, he had recognized Jackson’s expression. Back then, he hadn’t known why or what it meant. Now, he remembers it and senses some vague association with the dreams in which he tries to find the Chinese room. He wants to trust that there’s a place in which the answers will all be provided. He wants a dictionary that will teach him how to be a man. Unlike Jackson, though, he doesn’t think that one exists. There are no universals. There is no truth that we are trying to uncover in the only way that Jackson would’ve understood— the way an archeologist sifts through layers of dirt, patiently looking for the pieces that were once part of a coin, a corpse, a kettle, before the annihilating storm of history blew through. There’s a churning mass that has never had a meaning. It isn’t moving towards or away from something. It just is what it is.

When he was undercover, speaking Babylonian had helped; he’d felt like a different person. He’d felt like he was moving through a different world, one that wasn’t organized according to the same kind of principles he’d grown up with. There was no right or wrong to it; just a different set of facts. He took to it like a fish to water, once he’d mastered the language. The sense of alienation was familiar to him. When he went back to Earth between assignments, that was the strange part— standing in his own house, his own kitchen.

And now he never has to go back there. Never has to speak English again, if he doesn’t want to. He can move through different languages, different truths, like putting uniforms on and taking them off when you’re finished.

“Shkarum,” he says to the bartender, tapping the bar with two emphatic fingers. “Ak shkarum yahab, vakash.”

His accent is very good.

***

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

so i’d really like to finish my guardian takedown lore analysis, but honestly the game isn’t really fun to play at the moment anymore (even with the health debuffs they added) so I think im going to be taking a break for now because I’m just not having fun anymore.

this game has a lotta mechanical problems i think need to be addressed so im gonna summarize it as bullet points below. I’ll play the new dlc when it drops, but idk if i’ll be on more than that (grinding, end-game stuff) until they make some serious changes. I’ve been playing (near) daily since launch, followed the patch/hotfix notes every single week, and my patience has finally, FINALLY run dry, especially with that really disappointing Phase 1 Patch and then the hotfix this week not adding anything else. What is the balancing team doing??? 😩

tl;dr: FIX THE VAULT HUNTERS!!!!

anyway. That’s all I needed to get outta my system. I might log on to this blog every now and again to post some random shit that pops into my head (probably with regards to my AU), but I’m not going to be actively playing and posting for the time being. Goodbye (for now), and here’s hoping the new DLC is good!! 

guardian takedown only problems:

there’s a lot of waiting around, and sometimes it’s not explicitly stated that you’re waiting for something, so you’ll be lost on what to do next (not sure if that’s a dialogue glitch or not)

the crystal charge insta-death is bull. just. what the hell. at least make it so you just have to start over. killing ur players for failing a “puzzle” that they then have to fight all the way back to is so infuriating.

dying because you fell off a platforming puzzle is also bull. 

i remember playing the first DMC on my playstation in middle school and having a conniption over the part in the observatory(? it’s been a hot minute since I played DMC 1) with the disappearing/invisible platforms. I h a t e jumping puzzles. why are they in a section of the game where death is semi-permanent and a detriment to your teammates. i tried the takedown 2x with friends and both times one friend didn’t make the first big jump to the temple and had to wait for our inevitable deaths. that’s so unfair to them.

there’s absolutely no reason for a boss to have 12 fuckin immunity phases. 4 per health bar with 3 health bars? Who the fuck designed this? *pumps shotgun* i just wanna talk. 

i appreciate a tasteful immunity phase every now and again (the ones in the Valkyrie fight are actually p reasonable), but christ. that is overkill. I don’t mind the main boss fight, since u can end those early through certain actions, but jesus. the mid-boss fight is annoying as hell. you spend more time running from the immunity phases and finding the damn boss than u do actually shooting it.

drop rates are crap, which I guess should be expected given what happened with the Maliwan Takedown and the handful of months it took for them to fix that, but also you think they’d have learned.

in the maliwan takedown there’s a sense of progression thru the facility after you kill each area’s batch of enemies, but in this one it’s... dampened by the crystal charging sequences. you kill all the enemies in an area, press a button, and now you have to kill 3x that number of enemies in the same area, expect you’re just standing there motionless. It’s not fun.

the crystal charging stuff is just not fun in general. standing in a square is not entertaining. it’s worse that it was clearly designed for 3+ players when a majority of people play/grind solo

i gotta admit the boss fights just aren’t as fun as the Maliwan Takedown fights overall. I felt like a real badass fighting Wotan for the first time, but the main boss for this Takedown is kind of a bitch. Wotan’s fight is chaos, there’s so much shit happening at once and you don’t really have time to process everything and I love it. This one is p meh...

This would be fine and I’d 100% not care that much if there weren’t all these OTHER problems

General Issues with the Game

There’s no endgame stuff to play outside of the takedowns. 

I assume they’re working on the first raid given some stuff I found in the Guardian Takedown files, but I really wish they’d keep the seasonal events/areas. They give us the option to disable/enable them while they’re ‘active’, just give us the ability to do it whenever we want.

when i hop on i either run through Athenas (my favorite map), or farm a boss or two. I have all the loot i really need from the maliwan takedown/elsewhere, and the guardian takedown just... isn’t fun atm, so i have nothing to do.

I’ve reset my playthru multiple times to play the main story at m10, but u can only play it (and the dlc) so many times

Mayhem levels and modifiers are a hot m e s s

a majority of the modifiers just aren’t fun to play with

they incorporated like 2-3 fun modifiers (from the community), then added a bunch that straight-up aren’t. I’m fine with the game being more difficult, but at least give us modifiers that make it more entertaining to play at a higher level instead of more annoying. I like the ones that have trade-offs or add new ‘enemies’, but I hate the ones that just straight up reduce your damage output.

a majority of the weapons with the mayhem 10 anointment (scaling) do not work on mayhem 10 (we’ll go more in-depth with this later)

Player Characters (Vault Hunters!!!) are also a hot mess and a lot of problems plaguing them haven’t been fixed SINCE LAUNCH

theyre literally the basis of the game and its balance. why havent you guys fixed them yet. stop adding new content until they’re fixed. no new skill trees until the base 3 trees work ON EVERY CHARACTER.

seriously. Why is amara p much limited to using Phasegrasp. Why does Iron Bear not matter to Moze except to proc anointments. MAKE ALL ACTION SKILLS EQUAL AND HAVE HEFT.

i wrote an essay here about it bc i feel that strongly about this

SERIOUSLY FIXING UR VAULT HUNTERS WILL MAKE BALANCING SO MUCH EASIER PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU THEY ARE THE BASE OF UR BALANCING WOES

ZANE IS STILL UNUSABLE WITHOUT THE SEEIN’ DEAD CLASS MOD!!!!!!!!!!!

MOZE IS SCREWED BC HER DAMAGE IS TOO RELIANT ON ASE ANOINTMENTS!!

AMARA DOESN’T HAVE A FUCKING MELEE BUILD AS THE ADVERTISED MELEE CHARACTER???

FL4K’S HEADCOUNT SKILL IS S T I L L BROKEN EVER SINCE THE RELEASE OF THE MALIWAN TAKEDOWN

ARE YOU GUYS LISTENING TO THE COMMUNITY *PLEASEEEEEEE*

BUFF AND FIX THE GODDAMN VAULT HUNTERS

Anointments were a mistake. Damage end-game is wayyyy too reliant on them

anoints should have a maximum of, like, a 20% damage bonus. the damage necessary to kill enemies *should be coming from the VHs themselves*. i don’t care if you have to revamp every single Vault Hunter’s skill trees and buff them all by 9000%. THEY DESERVE IT AT THIS POINT

at the moment in m10 there really isn’t much build diversity *even between Vault Hunters*. We’re all using the same 5 guns (OPQ System. Kaoson. idk. fuckin brainstormer? is that still a thing? jesus fuck) with the same 3 anointments (100% on ASE, cryo while SNTL, and 300% while 90%).

you want to diversify builds like you said during the gameplay reveal???? you want our choice in Vault Hunter to actually fuckin matter???? FIX THEM!!!! THEY SHOULD BE ABLE TO DEAL DAMAGE WITHOUT STUPID POWERFUL LEGENDARIES AND ANOINTMENTS!!!

Anoints also shouldn’t be common. At all. They should be, like, Pearl rarity. To let that happen, their damage needs to be tuned way the fuck down (again, 20ish % bonus MAX) and ALL ANOINTS NEED TO BE USEFUL IN SOME WAY

NOBODY IS GOING TO USE THE AIRBORNE OR SLIDING ANOINTMENTS JUST REMOVE THEM ALREADY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

obviously these changes can’t happen because they fucked up and buckled down with everything being anointed in m10, but still

imagine a world where the VHs actually did damage on their own without anointments and the damage buff from them was just an incentive to grind for the 100% perfect weapon and NOT A REQUIREMENT TO DEAL DAMAGE

>:(

A majority of gear is borderline worthless at M10

I’m fine with the difficulty of M10, i should let it be known. The enemy health isn’t really the problem IF ALL GUNS ACTED THE SAME AS THE OPQ SYSTEM

ffs.

you know, if you fixed ur vault hunters so they all did damage with just purple weapons (abt the same damage as legendaries w/o special effects) and removed the anointment requirement from late-game play, balancing your guns would be sooo much easier. you know. just saying.

right now only 10% (im being generous) of guns in the game are viable. 90% are worthless. We need AT LEAST 60-70% viable at M10. WHERE IS MY BUILD DIVERSITY. WHY ARE ALL LEGENDARIES NOW JUST “HEY THIS GUN IS STRONGER THAN THE LAST 4 WE RELEASED. HAVE FUN”

how to fix this problem? do as above: BUFF YOUR PLAYER CHARACTERS. MAKE ANOINTMENTS LESS STRONG.

then, at least the 10% already strong weapons would be stupid strong and OP as fuck, BUT AT LEAST WE COULD HAVE BUILD VARIETY!!! I don’t care if other people are dummy strong one-shotting everything in sight. I don’t! so long as they don’t play with me, I couldn’t care less!!! I want to be able to play with the unique, interesting legendaries. instead of the OPQ System. which, by the way, I dislike compared to the normal Q-System. let me use the frozen heart shield and the infiltrator mod. I don’t wanna be chained to the Seein’ Dead anymore :(

honestly at this point im starting to think removing slag was a mistake bc then at least we could use guns that aren’t solely damage-based guns. you know how fucked up you’ve got me that im thinking maybe slag wouldn’t be so bad this time around??? YOU GOT ME FUCKED UP B A D.

FIX THE GAME

IM TAKING A BREAK

MAYBE I’LL BE LESS UPSET WHEN I COME BACK FOR THE DLC BUT HOT. DIGGITY. SHIT.

[vespiiqueen]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the ask box of the last 10 people who reblogged something from you (if you want !! 💛💖)

Wow I rambled a lot with this but i can't add cuts bc I'm on mobile rn DHSISHSJ sorry :"))))

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1. Ik Ik "haha how cringe are you" of me to say, but honestly? Homestuck. Homestuck helped me in a time of need and when i so desperately wanted something to latch onto. Finally, I caved into my friends telling me to read it-- and it's been a blast!! The epilogues / hs^2 make me feel kinda sad though, because so much of what I loved about the original was yeeted through the nine circles of hell and into the trash. I love Y/ffany's (I call her Yippi tho) design, the art is really pretty at times, Harry is a major dork, I LIVE for seeing Vrissy bc honestly?? Her design is 10/10, very early 2000s emo style and I also live for that. Tavros is cute and a nerd and I think that's swell!

But in terms of story and how any of this happens, it makes me sad to see it happen. If Vriska could return as Vrissy, why not OTHER beta trolls? Where's my Eridan fish man, writers?? Give me the boy or perish by my fury.

2. Also super "haha how cringe are you" but,,, murder cats (Warriors), esp the early 2005-2015 amvs and stuff. I remember watching Flightfootwarrior's "I Will Not Bow" Scourge amv for HOurs and having no clue what was happening, but all these edgy kitties were KITTIES! It's introduced me to a lot of music I still listen to to this very day (Imagine Dragons, Young/the entirety of Hollywood Undead, Breaking Benjamin). And yknow what?? This new arc is absolute chaos, but in the good way.

I'm an "OG Fan". I prefer the first arc, The Prophecies Begin, to almost any of the other arcs. I just could never get into the other arcs-- not to say I haven't read them, I HAVE and the Fire Scene was probably one of my favorite moments beside grumpy Jaypaw, god complex Lionblaze, and fear the gods Hollypaw. I thought the build-up for it was SUPER satisfying. Gray Wing is my baby and I fully embellish in the Gray Wing is Silverpelt theory.

This new arc is definitely something new for the universe. While I didn't read aVoS (but I may do that if i can find the files for it), and so I don't know the major events of it other than what I've seen M.A.P.'s (Multi-Animator Projects, for clarification,,, bc unfortunately that term is also something disgusting). There's fucking cat possession and all the Clans questioning their belief system, yo. Shit be on fire.

Also the Imposter is 100% Ashfur, that's canon now, yeah??? Also im sorry but fuck Root x Bristle that's the dumbest shit I have ever seen. Give me Root x Shadow or face the wrath of my dragon plushies.

RiverClan is my Clan and my gov assigned warrior name is Fireshell 🌟🌟

3. As much as I hate the author,,,,, Harry Potter. It's been a major part of my life for as long as I can remember. I can never really remember why, but I've always just loved it- the movies, the books, the extra little merch that would pop up in my local Walmart. Of course my favorite character is Draco Malfoy. I could go on and on and ON about how I think his character arc was SHIT and JKR didn't have the balls to make him a confident gay man that was always implied through the text (at least, my lesbian ass thought it was implied but i may just be projecting, idk). I could ramble about Draco for HOURS and what I think his character SHOULD have been and how his parents are horrible (more specifically, Lucius bc Narcissa [?] Actually showed a few good moments), and a child should never have to pay for their parents sins.

Oh noo, Draco's a villain because he's a victim of major abuse and peer pressure? He's a villain because a literal child can be horrible and they'll always always always stay as a horrible little fiend?? Fuck that. He's a child.

Unlike manchild grease pan Snape, who was a racist piece of shit and shouldn't have became a fucking school teacher but it's okay because he was ~~~in love~~~. No, fuck you, he was a creep. James Potter n Co may have been a little posh bitch to you, Snape, but that's no fucking excuse to continue to bluntly be a little cunt all the way into adulthood. You're an adult who flatly changed your PATRONUS to imitate Lily's. You have no excuse. And Harry went and named his child after you LIKE JESUS CHRIST, DID RON'S SISTER NOT HAVE A SAY IN THE NAMES TOO?????

I also fully adore the idea that Muggles can run into Hogwarts and their patronus can 100% be a made up, fantasy creature. Imagine you learn the patronus spell and suddenly fucking ARCEUS comes from your wand. Imagine learning the spell and CHTULU (i did not spell that right but im so tired) comes from your wand-- an entire ass fucking Lovecraftian, Eldrith horror is just the embodiment of you. What if it was a fucking Homestuck character like Vriska? How fucking METAL would that be?? Hskajssowjjsjs get on it fandom.

4. Hee hee very evident by my url but Pokemon is another major thing of mine. While vespiquen isn't my favorite (that title goes to Hydreigon), it is definitely up there!

I've ALWAYS enjoyed the idea of Pokemon. You run around, training up these fight monsters and collecting them. I remember playing my sister's Ruby version on her flip-up Gameboy. I couldn't even read but I ran around catching god only knows how many of the same pokemon wherever she was. Apparently, I had fought for hours in the same area and leveled her Blaziken up to lvl 50 something and left her lvl 30s in the dust LMAO.

I got my first game when it was Pearl/Diamond. It was Pearl, and it still holds a very fond place in my heart. I could barely read, I could barely write-- I had named my Turtwig something along the lines of "MmorpHy" and my player boy "ZbsibJ". Yes I remember the names slightly. I really didn't get far-- I barely got to the first gym but I was just so happy to play it.

I eventually lost the game, as a 5 year old would do, but I can still vividly remember what was happening when the game arrived. I had just came back from the dentist and was quite tired from fighting the dentist bc I was super scared. Mom suddenly handed me a box and said it was mine-- my overseas (at that time) dad had bought me Pearl and my sister Diamond, because I lost my shit about it when he visited one time.

Well, tdlr, I played it for about five minutes while struggling to stay awake against the loopy gas they made me take. I fell asleep listening to Twinleaf Town's soundtrack. Every time I play a rom of Pearl and I get to where the player's house fades in and I hear that first tune of the song, I get a huge smile on my face and cry-- as.. Weird as it sounds.

A few years later, I had gotten Pokemon Black bc I liked Reshiram on the cover. Now, this one I could actually READ when playing, but I don't remember a lot of things about it. I probably lost this one too, as a 8/9 year old would do. I DO remember, I chose Snivy and my sister chose Tepig (hrmm there's a theme here of grass/fire goin on......) and vibing to the music. I was so amazed by the sprites moving, I just kept getting into encounters to see the sprites move (oh boy, no one tell younger 7-9 y/o me about Zelda......oh wait....)

Playing Pokemon NOW, as a 17 year old """gifted""" chick, I stil have very fond memories. I recently beat Pokemon Black again and GOD the OTS SLAPS. I fucking adore the soundtrack-- the track that plays when you battle a trainer, the low health dings being turned into a legit song that also slaps, the battle! gym leader themes-- and oh my gOd, the legendary theme is amazing? It really tells you just how glorious these pokemon are supposed to be. It's not intimidating like Groudon/Kyroge/Rayquaza's themes. It's not action packed like Palkia/Dialga's is, it's not filled with tension like Giratina/Arceus's is-- but it radiates the GLORY that the beasts portray. And I live for that. (Also, Kyurem's version is my favorite because it glitches in the beginning and that's rly cool)

P/D/P and BW/BW2's stories, imo, are some of the greatest ones. Yeahhh, US/USUM's is cool and I haven't played XY nor SwSh-- but the ones I can find memorable are PDP and BW/BW2. I love N. I love Barry. They're my sons. Ghetsis is fucking terrifying, Cyrus needs a hug. Giratina scared the piss out of me when I was younger, which was NOT helped by Giratina and The Sky Warrior.

I think my favorite movies are the gen 4 ones. The Rise of Darkrai having a tear-jerking theme for such a mysterious pokemon (i still tear up when i hear Ocarion), Giratina being spiteful is a mood and Shaymin was cute, Arceus being angry is also a mood. Yeah, Pokemon 4Ever made me cry my eyes out over Celebi, Mewtwo Returns made me again cry because Mewtwo accepting who he is, I remember how vastly different the BW movies are-

I just. I have a lot of memories with the series, even if Gamefreak and Nintendo kinda do the series dirty a lot (your top-grossing thing and you made That monstrosity for the Switch? How dare you.). It's comforting to be stressed and pull up my roms for the games and to play them. Mystery Dungeon is incredibly fun to play, Pokemon Ranger is really fun with the concept (Shadows of Almia continues to kick my ass to this very day and FUCK the Jungle Relic, I hate the Water Challenge fucking gyarados bullshit). I remember the pokemon I got for MD (I got Time, my sis got Darkness) was Mudkip, if that is any help.

I love my little fictional pixel monsters.

5. Yup, someone told tiny 7-9 y/o me about console games. The legend of Zelda. My first Zelda game was Twilight Princess on the Wii and BOY did I play the fucking SHIT out of that game.

Honestly, looking back and looking at playthroughs now-- I still love TP. Twilight Princess is still one of my top favorite Zelda games-- yes, even after playing OoT, Majora's Mask, Wind Waker, Skyward Sword, the anniversary four swords edition for the DS where you could play by yourself (Nintendo pls bring that back, I don't have friends to play it with ;-;), Phantom Hourglass- ect.

Something about Twilight Princess grabbed me by the head and yeeted me into the world. I can remember playing it for hours with little to no breaks. I, a tiny 9 y/o, had gotten the hang of the controllers and managed to get past the tutorial quite easily. And then, I was launched into the game and I wasn't stopping for NOTHING. Mom and Dad would have to force me to save and get off to go and eat dinner. THAT sucked.

I had done everything on my own up until the first temple, the forest temple. Not where/when you saved the dumb kid, but when you were saving the spirit's light. Theeeeeeennn I got stuck on the fucking Forest Temple for deadass six months straight. I'd play for hours, running around in circles, unable to figure out where to go, and because I didn't grasp the temple's purpose of being that way- I'd get angry and get off. It wasn't until dad looked up a walkthrough and talked me through what I was supposed to do that I learned how to get through temples.

I had gotten to the last little fight with Ganondorf before the Wii broke and i could no longer play. Despite the Wii being broke and we got rid of it, I was ADAMANT on keeping the game, and I kept that game for YEARS. It was an original copy out of a sealed box, and I eventually lost it when I left it accidentally at my now ex-friend's house.

She had a Wii and I went "hey I have a Wii game!" And I brought my Zelda over. Worst fucking choice of my goddamn life. Mom called me to come home and said I couldn't sleep over like the original plan was, and that was it. My ex-friend stashed my Zelda and I never saw it again. And, even if I wanted to-- I couldn't get it back, which makes me upset. We had a BAD falling out. She likely doesn't even remember it's there, or sold it to the local game junkie kid who buys ALL games.

But I still love the game. Midna was amazing, and I loved how snarky she was and she has a very cute design! The game's OST is fucking phenomenal. Midna's Desperate Hour makes me cry bc goddamn it really sells how serious that situation is. I love Hyrule Field's theme in this game. I love the Twilight Realm's song. Zant was fucking hilariously scary. Ganondorf's design in this game scared the piss out of me when I was younger.

Midna and this game's Link and Zelda are def my favorites. Yeah yeah, Sheik is cool and all I Guess but dhsushwishs Midna holds the special place in my heart. She was totally my gay awakening BUT

For other game antagonists, I adore Ghirahim-- let's go you funky little queer-coded villain. Skull Kid was great, I love the entire dynamic of him. Prankster lost soul stumbles upon Majora's Mask and the mask makes him act out due to powers-- which, I actually took very heavy inspiration from for one of my OCs. The moon falling to Hyrule was a fucking terrifying looming threat.

But the game series holds a place, and I've yet to be able to play BoTW-- although, I'm fairly certain I'll like it. The playthroughs I've watched of it are all fairly decent! I just. Gotta save up enough money to buy it haha.

Dang guess I gotta go watch a Twilight Princess playthrough again.

Honorable Mentions:

Avatar: the Last Airbender, specifically Book 3

my OCs definitely make me happy, they're my children and I'd ramble A LOT longer if given the chance WHEEZE

My friends, but I didn't add them here bc it's more fictional stuff, I presume

Baking. I love to bake cupcakes.

Painting is fun. I'm an artist and goddammit im going to use painting as an excuse to make a mess.

Fire. I rly like fire, down to a pyromaniac level. However, i hate the fires that happened to my home town, the Great Smokey Fires of 2016-- THAT pissed me off. How dare you burn mountain landscapes to the ground. Perish.

History. I'm a history nerd.

I'm also a science nerd.

But fuck math, I cannot comprehend math to save my life.

For some reason, I rly like learning how the human body works??? like did you know, organs are actually sticky when touched by a bare hand?? Did you?? How fucking cool is that.

Bakugan. I love Bakugan, esp the DS game. I love my Darkus Leonidas. Give me back the online world, you peasants-- I want my Darkus Dragonoid. (Also fuck all my friends from when I was in kindergarten- my theory that Alice was Masquerade was somewhat correct.)

[theheavymetalmama]

Katie Reviews “Fallout 76″

Apocalyptic

I originally had no intention of playing this game. While I was wowed by the teaser trailer, the second it was confirmed that it would be an online massive multiplayer spinoff I immediately lost all interest. It’s a genre I couldn’t care less about, as MMO’s are all just endlessly killing random things across an open world that’s as big as an ocean but as shallow as a petri dish. Still, with WoW running on fumes and the battle royale genre being the new hotness in gaming developers and publishers are giving the MMO thing another shot, and in the case of Fallout 76 Bethesda asked “Can we have both?”

Clearly that answer is no.

Now full disclosure, yes, I played the original Fallout and Fallout 2, as well as Brotherhood of Steel, Fallout 3, New Vegas, and the very divisive Fallout 4. No, I’m not one of those fans who hold 1 and 2 aloft like She Ra’s magic sword nor do I think 3 or 4 are blights on the series. I also really dig New Vegas, but I’m one of the fans who likes the game and will admit its’ flaws other than the glitches.

So to answer your question. Is Fallout 76 the worst Fallout game ever? No, that would be Brotherhood of Steel, but 76 is right up there. I’m not kidding. Fallout 76 is a terrible game. When reviews and word of mouth came in I just had to try this game for myself, and luckily(?) for me a friend of mine got this game and let me give it a shot. I fired it up, created a character, watched the opening cutscene and jumped into the game, and oh my jumping Jesus. It wasn’t just bad, it was so much worse than I could have imagined. It’s exactly the kind of bog standard open world survival game with crafting and zombies shamelessly cashing in on the then success of games like Day Z and Rust that still flood Steam’s front page to this day.

First person shooting in Bethesda Fallout games were always a bit janky at best, but combat in this game feels like trying to play Fallout 3 where the VATS system doesn’t work and there’s an agitated cat constantly jumping on and off you while you play. Speaking of VATS, in this game, forget about it. I can’t tell you how often I shot at something at damn near point blank range and still managed to miss the target completely. Thought to be perfectly honest, even if I was landing direct hits it still wouldn’t matter all that much because pretty much every weapon in their vanilla form that isn’t a minigun or missile launcher has so little impact they may as well be BB guns.

The story is awful. Say what you will about the trite and lopsided main story of Fallout 4, but it was still a story. There a beginning, middle, and end with all sorts of different characters you meet along the way. In 76, all you do is talk to a bunch of random computer monitors and maybe a couple of robots that send you bouncing around all over the map like a Fallout themed pinball machine and you’re the ball. And to what end? I don’t know, because it was so soul crushingly boring that I outright abandoned the main story after like the fourth time speaking to a static screen with some dude’s mug on it.

While there is some impressive lighting in this game, on the whole the graphics and aesthetics look like a bland, washed out version of Fallout 4. There are a few decent visuals and some of the interior details paint a clear picture of what happened when the bombs fell, but unlike previous installments almost none of them are memorable. It’s been well over a year since I last played Fallout 3, and I still remember the locations, set pieces, and visuals like the wrecked Nuka Cola truck and the entrance to Rivet City. Meanwhile I dropped 76 not two days ago and I barely remember anything as far as location specific details go.

Now I don’t know if this part was just me, but the server I played on was barely populated. I ran into maybe three other people, one of which was a griefing little shithead. Not only did it feel empty for an online multiplayer game, but this made fights with certain enemies mind numbingly tedious. You can go it alone, but it’s painfully obvious the game was designed for you to pal around with at least five or six other players. Again, I don’t know if this is common or just me, but my playthrough was pretty damn barren. I know that sounds weird since Fallout games are supposed to feel dead, barren, and empty, but this felt less like wandering a post nuclear wasteland and more like exploring an abandoned shopping mall.

And speaking of tedium there’s the resource management and crafting. I only made it to about level 10 or so, but even then by that point I was spending about ten minutes every hour or so sorting and scraping through my loot so as to not overburden my character. See, the only place you can safely sleep and store items is your own personal, portable camping sight. It’s a good idea in theory, but in practice it only serves to add more arduous busywork as your storage box consists of a measly 400 pounds. Which wouldn’t be a big deal if it weren’t for the fact that after Fallout 4 I was wired to pick up every single useless piece of junk for every scrap of resources for building my settlements, so in Fallout 76 I was endlessly juggling my gear deciding what to keep, what to scrap, and what to leave behind. I don’t feel like I’m making use of what I have in order  to build a new world from the ashes of the old; I feel like Tim the Tool Man at a fucking garage sale.

Fallout 76 is to the Fallout series what Chinese Democracy was to Guns n’ Roses. It’s well and truly awful, a blight not just on the series and Bethesda, but on gaming as a whole. MMO’s in general rarely make any impact, and even the ones that succeed eventually get chewed up and spat out by World of Warcraft. And since WoW refuses to die, time and time again a publisher throws their hat into the MMO ring to test their mettle and very few of them are successful.

Bethesda is yet another notch on the holster of failed MMOs. They wanted World of Fallout, and instead they ended up with City of Zeroes.

2/10. Country roads, take me home. Please.

[spladoum]

There’s a Sim hanging out of your pocket ... Replies (GIF warning, Very Very VERY Long)

justanothersimsblog replied to your photoset “Derping around with this until I get bored (which is likely to be soon...”

Uh I wanna add you!

getmygameon replied to your photoset “Derping around with this until I get bored (which is likely to be soon...”

Oh I didn't realize we could add other players. I don't know what my code is yet, but once I fiddle around with a bit more ill be happy to add you ❤

GET OVER HERE, GROUP HUG INCOMING

hyperkaos replied to your photoset “Today I woke up to find a persistent announcement that it was Méline’s...”

so I just looked at this and it says "in app purchases $2.99 - $99.99 per item" are they out of their minds?

I was certain that no one would be foolish enough to pay for the $99.99 item. (Full disclosure: I have bought about $50 worth of premium cash, some with Paypal, but still ...) After being on the official EA Answers board, I quickly realized that I was quite wrong. Multiple people there are clearly spending hundreds of RL dollars playing this. Someone there was proposing that the developers implement a monthly subscription, even. It’s ... flabbergasting, to say the least. :O

hyperkaos replied to your photoset “Today I woke up to find a persistent announcement that it was Méline’s...”

I'll admit the cuteness of it, but good grief, I get enough of sims here lol

Haha, fair enough! :) One very big point in the game’s favor imo is that it can more or less play itself. In the immortal words of Ron Popeil, you can “set it and forget it.” So it’s fairly relaxing in that way. Of course, if you’re foolish enough to actually begin to care about your characters, you’re headed for Trauma City eventually!

rollo-rolls replied to your photoset “Today I woke up to find a persistent announcement that it was Méline’s...”

Off topic but... JESUS CHRIST, THIS IS HOW SIMS MOBILE LOOK LIKE? And we thought Sims 1 looked amazing...

Never off-topic! It is pretty amazing how far the tech comes in just fifteen years, isn’t it? :D On the other hand, had the developers actually managed to produce Sims 4 as a true mobile game in this style ... 

hyperkaos replied to your photo “It’s just not Sims without things like this happening.”

lol truth!

wannabecatwriter replied to your photo “It’s just not Sims without things like this happening.”

EA keeps it consistent :D

mochasims replied to your photo “It’s just not Sims without things like this happening.”

LOL

jenba replied to your photo “I’m not even going to ask. That poor chicken.”

lol :)

getmygameon replied to your photo “I’m not even going to ask. That poor chicken.”

What...on...earth.

There are a lot of times playing this game when you just wonder “How did this slip past QA?” And then you eventually realize that you are the QA, and suddenly the nonsense is understandable. :P In good news, I think they fixed the hot tub glitch! :P

hyperkaos replied to your photoset “Éme decided to really put some muscle behind learning the restaurant...”

you really need to step back lol

mysimsloveaffair replied to your photoset “Éme decided to really put some muscle behind learning the restaurant...”

Good tip...I didn't know you could do that!

Yesss! That was the only way I could stay alive for quite some time at the start of the game. (Of course, now I have cupcakes falling out of my ears!)

aikea-guinea replied to your photoset “Éme decided to really put some muscle behind learning the restaurant...”

Nice knife skills, Éme!

justanothersimsblog replied to your photoset “This has been a fun 24-36 hour period. Ever since learning to just let...”

There's a bar?! I need that haha

I wish! I mean, I know the bar is a community-only item for a reason (because there’s jack-all to do at the events), but that would be a good item to have for home usage, dontcha think? Or even as a party item? *ponders* 

treason-and-plot replied to your photoset “Someone leveled up! :O Éme is thinking about getting a job at the...”

I thought this was TS4 for a long minute :D

I don’t blame you in the least! The amount of stuff in game directly cribbed from Sims 3/4 is pretty unreal. And we’ll give you more of it ... for the low low price of $19.99! (Per item pack.)

goatkibble replied to your photoset “Someone leveled up! :O Éme is thinking about getting a job at the...”

LMAO

Well, you already know the alternative men planned if I couldn’t find an Adam for him to marry, haha! Stan may yet show up! XD

getmygameon replied to your photoset “Someone leveled up! :O Éme is thinking about getting a job at the...”

Pfft! Smack me XD when you said that 'pie' line my mind went to the gutter til I saw the ACTUAL pie XD I'm sorrrryyyyy! I'm the worst

I can’t begin to imagine why you would think such things of me ...

justanothersimsblog replied to your photo “Apparently someone was listening when I mentioned hot tubs earlier...”

Lol. Well this saved me from checking out what the male's swimsuit looked like! I'm currently waiting for the kitchen event to recharge since I did it too early and it didn't count for the quest *grumbles*

So frustrating! I know they’re learning as they go, but but there’s way too much that isn’t documented adequately so players end up making completely avoidable and/or costly errors.

wannabecatwriter replied to your photo “Apparently someone was listening when I mentioned hot tubs earlier...”

Those bottoms are totally something Eme would wear in cannon story.

He really would ...

getmygameon replied to your photoset “Yes, you’re pretty, asshole. Stop gloating. Geez. Still...”

I'm surprised that game is still going :o

simtonomy replied to your photoset “Yes, you’re pretty, asshole. Stop gloating. Geez. Still...”

Lol, I'm grateful Éme entertained the guests at Reyna's foodie party!

justanothersimsblog replied to your photoset “Yes, you’re pretty, asshole. Stop gloating. Geez. Still...”

Hahaha Ibis is always smile. I was happy to see Eme at the parties, he always looked like he was having a good time.

mysimsloveaffair replied to your photoset “Yes, you’re pretty, asshole. Stop gloating. Geez. Still...”

I love your updates! Éme has shown up at my family's party. He's beginning a friendship with a couple of them. I always enjoy seeing Éme in my game!

Certain of attention, that’s him for sure!

wannabecatwriter replied to your photoset “This is Éme. I’m not here, you know what to do.  “Hi, Éme? This is...”

A good excuse to skip work, though.

It’s amazing what you can do when you’re technically on the clock ...

mysimsloveaffair replied to your photoset “This is Éme. I’m not here, you know what to do.  “Hi, Éme? This is...”

Ha! Too funny =) Did you get your hot tub yet?

getmygameon replied to your photoset “This is Éme. I’m not here, you know what to do.  “Hi, Éme? This is...”

Lol! I started this game last night. I might restart it though bc my initial video didn't record XD

Video?! I can barely take photos and you’re getting videos!?

getmygameon replied to your photoset “And all you wanted was somebody to care …  I went over to the EA...”

Is it bad I started humming the song the second i saw that line? XD

At least it isn’t “More Than Words?” XD

mysimsloveaffair replied to your photoset “I now present to you … Éme Gaillard and Derek Solis … err, Adam...”

They need to include a gifting system because I ended up with two hot tubs and I'd gladly give you one. It took me a while to get the first, then I got a 2nd one right away. I'm hoping the next bag you open is a hot tub!!!

wannabecatwriter replied to your photoset “I now present to you … Éme Gaillard and Derek Solis … err, Adam...”

^^ seconding this. Gifting would be nice.

Between the hell raised over the hot tub event and the constant question “but y cant we SELL things??????”, I think the developers/coders are pretty aware that some things need to change. The Easter Egg Event was a step in the right direction, as was the in-game feedback survey. Hopefully things improve in future! 

ice-creamforbreakfast replied to your photoset “I now present to you … Éme Gaillard and Derek Solis … err, Adam...”

Somewhere in the world, @goatkibble​ is having a nosebleed at the thought of Adam in not only TS4 style, but TS4 Mobile style XD

wannabecatwriter replied to your photoset “A few more photos from the past two days. The wedding party was a...”

But "More Than Words" is the jam !!!

goatkibble replied to your photoset “A few more photos from the past two days. The wedding party was a...”

They are so consistent with their canon selves bahahaha

They really are! Even as elders, when not engaged with other people they’re very likely to be chasing each other around the house and canoodling. Eternal luff *sigh*

goatkibble replied to your photoset “Gah … little Rohan Gaillard is super-precious. (And super-expensive!...”

Sounds about right bahahaha

It wouldn’t be so bad that the baby/toddler stuff costs so much, except ... the game has a mechanism in place that regularly breaks items. If your items are more expensive, they cost more to repair, naturally. Baby items are VERY expensive compared to the starter items, so should the toddler bed break more than a couple of times in a day, along with everything else breaking in the house, that could be your daily salary down the drain ...

caterpillarsims replied to your photoset “Another day, another $0.72 (after taxes). Éme and Adam are still crazy...”

Kristi's husband (Benjamin) also started a rivalry with Eme. I accidentally clicked the 'confrontational' introduction over the friendly once, and since then whenever he interacts with Eme (who is always hanging around my house) Eme is like 'Oh, it's you' in that tone. Cracks me up every time. Especially because Ben is kind of a health nut jock, I can see him and Eme not getting along at all.

Haha, I bet! I try to use the “rivalry” prompts sparingly, because as funny as I find it, part of me still feels very mean-spirited for it. I always wonder if the other person whose sim I’m arguing with is getting their feelings hurt :O

justanothersimsblog replied to your photoset “I’ve been down with a sinus infection for a few days, so I’ve been...”

Hahaha you went for the frenemies one.

justanothersimsblog replied to your photo “Yes, it’s SO nice to see you (:”

Lmao

They were SO close to being done, too! Maybe Shany can pick up the slack with Matteo. He seems the type to run around aggravating folks whenever possible :P

getmygameon replied to your photo “And here, we have a lovely specimen of the JacobTechrAugust.”

Lol ^^

mysimsloveaffair replied to your photoset “While papa Éme and daddy Adam were preoccupied with hosting their...”

My character just dropped by! Thanks for explaining the whole marriage to another player thing. I've just been making an extra person within my household for my sims to marry, because I wasn't sure how it all worked.

Just another thing that’s integral to the game’s mechanics that no one could be bothered to explain in advance -__-;;; It’s certainly not a thing you want to learn the hard way (like I did!).

justanothersimsblog replied to your photoset “While papa Éme and daddy Adam were preoccupied with hosting their...”

Everett is a cutie! He was at my sims' party talking up with people and Shany befriended him.

justanothersimsblog replied to your photoset “Yup, they’re still at it. After a solid two hours of insults, cursing,...”

Bahahaha. Meanwhile she started a BFF thing with Everett. It's going great! They wanted to make plans to hangs out or go to the movies or something like that.

D’awww, sounds just about right. Everett is terribly lovable. 

caterpillarsims replied to your photoset “While papa Éme and daddy Adam were preoccupied with hosting their...”

Sadly, Mayra got accidentally retired this morning =(. I am still heartbroken. But I did read somewhere about another player who married and moved in a friend's retired elder, which made them young again. So if Everett wants to give that a try with Mayra, you have my consent. Mayra has 3 star Good trait, and her hair is a level 34 unlock. Her dress is also a story unlock item, and she's still wearing her Izzy bracelet.

caterpillarsims replied to your photoset “While papa Éme and daddy Adam were preoccupied with hosting their...”

Also, just this morning, she bought a new eyeshadow and some shoes, so, lots of goodies with her if you can move her in.

I almost did :( Everett’s still sitting at a level 6 relationship with her, and if Kaydence hadn’t happened along, I would have taken the chance for sure. But it was just too heartbreaking to think that they might get all the way to a level 8 relationship and not be allowed to move forward, since the game is not actually coded to allow adults to continue their romantic relationships with elders. (I have heard that sims can divorce and re-marry at will though, so I may pursue that course momentarily if they reach level 8 and I see the “proposal” options.)

blythelyre replied to your photo “The infamous speedo shorts return! Looking sharp, Adam.”

How do I visit?!

getmygameon replied to your photo “The infamous speedo shorts return! Looking sharp, Adam.”

Lol!!!

getmygameon replied to your photo “The infamous speedo shorts return! Looking sharp, Adam.”

@blythelyre look for parties. I didnt realize it was her sims til I saw the name lolol!

Just a heads-up, the next time I can throw a party will be this coming Tuesday/Wednesday if you wanna pop by. Save the date! :D

goatkibble replied to your photo “The infamous speedo shorts return! Looking sharp, Adam.”

Ha! I just realised their son has Eme's face and Adam's eye shape! That is also canon! :D

Haha! Meant to be, even across mediums! :D

justanothersimsblog replied to your photoset “Differences in parenting styles: Adam: “You are bestest baby, you...”

Omg yes! The money is ridiculous! The most you can earn is 450 (+whatever you get from an add) but the furnitures can cost 6k! My new kitchen must've costed 9k between all the expensive counters...and I've unlocked more expensive stuff since.

I didn’t realize immediately that items cost more as you buy more of them (what a charming idea, EA -____- ) so my plans for redecorating the kitchen went to hell within 20 minutes of starting. I remembered thinking, “Didn’t I have more money than this?” as I bought the countertops and finally realizing that the Sage Counters had increased from 300 to 690. It was a very ugly surprise. They still don’t have any cabinets.  Once Adam and Éme die off (;__;) the kids will be free to work constantly and earn dough, so that they can buy those §2500 dresses and garbage hairstyles. At least those won’t break. -__-;;’

reverieinsimlish replied to your photoset “Everett, your father and I have been to the hospital to find out why...”

I have the opposite problem, in that I have had 4 girls and only 1 boy.

Alas! I’d still trade with you, though. The family is up to boy number 4, and from what I’ve read in the accounts from others, they’re likely to keep on having boys until they hit 7 or 8!

blythelyre replied to your photo “NO SIR NEVER YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED *starts kicking and screaming...”

Noooo

blythelyre replied to your photo “NO SIR NEVER YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED *starts kicking and screaming...”

Emma and Gracie need mates!!!!

Make sure you come to the party, then! At the rate I’m going, Brooks Gaillard should be all grown up by then and one of your ladies can take him home! :D

curmudgeonness replied to your photo “NO SIR NEVER YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED *starts kicking and screaming...”

I don't know how people can get attached to their pixel people - says the one who has 36+ variations of simself in one neighborhood and won't let any of his legacy sims die... *hugs*

Put it like this ... you’ll never see a version of Rosalind Frio in this game ;)

wannabecatwriter replied to your photoset “*sighs* Well, I managed to screw myself royally today. I finally...”

That almost happened to me a bunch of times. I swear the developers did this on purpose.

justanothersimsblog replied to your photoset “*sighs* Well, I managed to screw myself royally today. I finally...”

I HAATE the retirement prompt

caterpillarsims replied to your photoset “*sighs* Well, I managed to screw myself royally today. I finally...”

I feel your pain. that retirement pop up is the worst.

I was able to avoid it for quite some time, because I was aware that it was coming for Éme. But I wasn’t expecting it for Adam, so I just reached for a button in the middle of an event and bloop! All progress lost. And yes, I also suspect it’s done that way intentionally. There’s no other explanation for why traits/retirement seem to be two of maybe four actions total in the entire game that there’s no way to cancel once initiated. *scowls*

[tankermottind]

Morrowind musings

So I started playing Morrowind in earnest yesterday. I had previously tried Morroblivion, but it’s an ugly, aesthetically disjointed, clunky, crash-happy piece of shit, so unless Skywind actually leads to a version 1.0, the original Morrowind in all its byzantine, easily-exploited, often moment-to-momently tedious glory is the only way to go. And you know? I don’t even mind. This is a very cerebral, wordy, almost literary game with an incredibly rich setting that rewards taking your time, planning things out, and exploring thoroughly. It’s also a game about the Dunmer, their worldview, their culture, their history, their spirituality, and their relationship to the empire.

Out of rote memory I created my usual default RPG character that I do for a first playthrough of an RPG--a moderately tanky blond-haired prettyboy fighter with a sword and shield. This was a terrible mistake. A male Nord with flowing blond hair and majors in Long Blade, Block, Medium Armor, Armorer, and Athletics is the complete antithesis of the sort of person who would be the Nerevarine and complete the main quest of Morrowind. I’m a colonizing white male brute from the country that unleashed Tiber Septim on the world, joining the Imperial Cult (white missionaries), Imperial Legion (white colonial garrison), and House Hlaalu (collaborators with white colonialists) to impose Imperial (white) ideas of “civilization” on a country whose people have different lifeways and a bizarre (to white people) religion that violates the strict and inflexible dichotomies the Imperial Cult (white Christianity) maintains between gods and devils, life and death, even male and female (just read the 36 Sermons of Vivec and you’ll understand, even if you understand nothing else), and thus absolutely terrifies them.

The Imperial Cult, like the Abrahamic tradition that lies just below its pagan surface, is obsessed with stasis, with fixity, with certainty, with a single revealed Truth. The Dunmer worldview embraces change, ambiguity, fluidity, and the difference between the Imperial Cult and the Dunmer religions (plural) on matters of death is a perfect example. Death is the most profound and irreversible change imaginable to a mortal being, and the Imperial Cult hides it, shuns it, creates a strict taboo around it--Arkay is not so much a god of death as the god of the taboo around death. The Dunmer communicate and interact with the spirits of their dead ancestors, pray to them, receive boons from them, and some Dunmer even pledge their souls to serve the living Dunmer community for eternity (for instance, the Ghostfence that keeps the entire world from being overrun by cancer monsters) after their deaths instead of going to their appointed binary Aetherius/Sovngarde or Oblivion judgment decreed by the white colonizers. The Empire tolerates the Dunmer religion just because of the horrendous military nightmare a campaign of total cultural genocide would be for the Legion, but they are actively trying to convert the Dunmer and undermine the power of Tribunal with the end goal of destroying Dunmer religious traditions altogether and assimilating them into worshiping the Nine Divines in the one true Imperial Way. The Nerevarine is the promised messiah of the Dunmer. The Nerevarine will redeem the corruption and purge the sin of the Dunmer religious authorities and expel the foreign barbarians. The Nerevarine can never be a Nord who worships White Jesus Talos and the rest of the Nine.

I typically pick sword-and-board fighters when playing an RPG for the first time because playing a defensive fighter is almost universally more straightforward and simpler. You walk up to things and hit them with your sword until they fall over, occasionally raising your shield or chugging a few potions. A fighter is rarely most powerful class in an RPG, but it (or one of its child classes, like the paladin in Infinity Engine games) is almost always the easiest to pick up and just cruise through the game with. A fighter relies on brute force, throwing his weight around to get what he wants. You will give me that. You will do this for me. I will hit you with my sword. The Nerevarine is a person who enters the tangled thicket of Dunmer politics and religion and brings the people together and redeems the Old Ways. The Nerevarine would read and understand The 36 Lessons of Vivec, and seek intellectual and spiritual enlightenment. The Nerevarine can never be a sword and shield tank. Beating on things until they fall over is what the Imperials do.

I’m already around ten hours in. I am thinking of reroll as a Dunmer wizard. The reputation I’ve heard of Morrowind sorcery letting you completely break the game sounds like a better simulation of wizardry than the Emperor Palpatine first-person-shoot-lighting-from-your-hands-er that Skyrim magic is. After all, is magic not the exploitation of glitches in the system, breaking the rules of reality? Why not a system where you can theoretically create a potion of Restore 9999 Health? But it also sounds like the sort of thing Bethesda are absolutely going to fuck up.

[largelungs]

END OF YEAR *2*0*1*9*

Girls who love computers // Meathead sad boy hardcore // Extremely horny pop music // Weirdo dance music // Inoffensive indie pop // “World” music // Rap that white people like // Rap that nobody likes // Things that sound like Yung Lean // Things that are Yung Lean // A bunch of stupid shit that sounds bad

...

03 Greedo / Trap House

100 gecs / money machine - I fucking hate this band

Aldous Harding / The Barrel

Amnesia Scanner / AS Aca

Anamanaguchi / Lorem Ipsum (Arctic Anthem) - I’m never not listening to this song

Angel-Ho / Business

Angel Olsen / New Love Cassette

angelic milk / acid & coca-cola - the most normal sounding song by a Russian artist on this playlist

Ariana Grande / 7 rings

Babyface Ray / The Streets - The Levels section of Pitchfork is criminally underrated and they told me that Babyface Ray is the Voice of the Detroit, which I believe because I just believe everything I read

Baby Fendii / Glock19 - I don’t know shit about this song but I just looked up the music video and its in my fav genre of “hoes with guns in the pool”

Bad Bunny / Callaita - I literally can’t tell the difference between Bad Bunny and any other reggaeton but FUCK IT

Bella Boo / Do The Right Thing

benny blanco & JUICE WLRD / Graduation - this song played at Juice WRLD’s funeral

Bicep / Glue

Big Thief / Forgotten Eyes

Bill Callahan / Young Icarus - really haven’t sat down with my very good friend Bill Callahan’s new album (he’s my friend) and given it a hard listen but I’ve been a big fan of this song so far so I just listen to it a bunch

Billie Eilish / bad guy - this song was refreshing af to hear on the radio at my old cafe; you can make a valid argument that billie eilish is super corny but, uh, she’s seventeen??? I hope she sticks around cause I’m really curious how her work’s gonna mature if its already this realized

Blind Seagull / Nails - I was always under the impression that Russia has two genres of music: pretty sexy boy and ugly old man who is yelling at me, but it turns out they also make insanely catchy post-punk! Detritri records is a godsend and I’ve listen to so much Russian music this year that I can’t relate to any of my friends anymore

Bonnie Baxter / ELF OWL - One of my favorite genres is “dropped a bunch of stuff on the ground and then recorded it”

BUMP OF CHICKEN / 記念撮影 - Despite the ridiculous name this band is huge in Japan; I found out about this song cause its used in an emotionally overwhelming One Piece music video that is just a 5 minute ad for noodles.

Burna Boy / On The Low

Caroline Polachek / So Hot You’re Hurting My Feelings - It’s the singer from Chairlift! Remember them??

Cate le Bon / Home To You

CHAI / Great Job

Channel Tres / Sexy Black Timberlake - house music + hip hop

Charli XCX / White Mercedes - I am nothing if not a Charli XCX stan - put it on my fucking headstone, baby

Charly Bliss / Under You - I know nothing about this band but this song was used in a promo for a dope looking DIY slice of life game

Clams Casino / Rune - Am I supposed to rap over this?

Control Top / Office Rage

Counterparts / Wings of Nightmares

Danny Brown / uknowhatimsayin¿

Dorian Electra / Career Boy

Drinking Boys and Girls Choir / National Police Shit

Dump Him / Unimportant - finally, a lesbian Tom Delonge

Earl Sweatshirt / El Toro Combo Meal

EARTHGANG & Young Thug / Mirrorland

Ecco2k / AAA Powerline - This is Swedish culture like it or not

Ecco2k & Thaiboy Digital / Western Union - SONG OF THE YEAR SONG OF THE YEAR SONG OF THE YEAR

E-Saggila / Aziza - Dropped stuff again but the stuff is really heavy this time

Fire-Toolz / Field Whispers (Into the Crystal Palace) - it’s like Burzum but he’s trapped in a computer (and also not a Nazi)

Floating Points / Bias

Galen Tipton / Fake Meat - This time you dropped a bunch of baby toys

Grimes /  4 AEM - The more you hate Grimes the more I stan her, and I honestly DO NOT KNOW WHY

Griselda / Chef Dreds - Buffalo rap! RAP RAP RAP!!! STREET SHIT!!!

Hannah Diamond / The Ending - You’re gonna hate this

Headie One / Both - The UK’s best exports are grime, breakfast, and bar brawls

Holly Herndon / Frontier - this album is Holly Herndon and an AI choir and its fucking INSANE

James Ferraro / Recycled Sky

The Japanese House / You Seemed So Happy

Jay Mitta / Don Bet - AYYYYYYY

Jenny Hval / High Alice

JPEGMAFIA / Jesus Forgive Me, I Am A Thot

Juan Wauters / Blues Chilango

Knocked Loose / Mistakes Like Fractures - I listened to a lot of a meathead hardcore this year but legit it all sounds the same so this is just a stand-in for all those albums

Koffee / Toast

Lafawndah / Ancestor Boy

Leonard Cohen / Happens to the Heart - He ain’t dead bitch!

Lil Reek / Maintain - Rap game Andy Milonakis

Lil Tecca / Ransom

Lingua Ignota / MAY FAILURE BE YOUR NOOSE

Loraine James / Glitch Bitch

MahiToThePeople / Madaanoumigaaokattakoro

Mannequin Pussy / Patience

Mindforce / Excalibur - Somehow it took this long for someone to mix hardcore and high fantasy

Moor Mother / Imagines - Death Grips adjacent

The Mountain Goats / Possum By Night - My favorite song about being a possum

Nilufer Yanya / Heavyweight Champion of the Year

Nikvek / Walking in a Spiral Toward the House

Nonlocal Forecast / Celestial Nervous System

Octo Octa / Imminent Spirit Arrival - New Hampshire house music

Organ Tapes / Springfield - Actually my most listened to album of the year

Oso Oso / basking in the glow - The logical progression of Long Island emo / glad to see Jade Lilitri still getting love years after State Lines

Otoboke Beaver / datsu . hikage no onna

Partybreaker / Cвет истины - Russian straight edge hardcore

Pharmakon / Spit It Out - I was gonna see her live but I bailed cause I AM OLD

Polo G / Through Da Storm

Pop Smoke / Dior

Restraining Order / Don’t Really Think - less meathead more snot-nosed

(Sandy) Alex G / Hope - Snuck in Alex G real quick last minute; I have not listened to them in like two years lmao

Shin Guard / Kennedy

Shirokuma / Black Lungs - scratches that blackened atmospheric emo itch left by Pianos - who are apparently still a band?

Shitty Life / We’re Dead - SNOTTY!

Shortparis / Страшно - soundtrack to my Russian fever dream

Shygirl / BB

Sisso / Biti No. 5

Slayyyter / BFF - Reminds me of crunkcore but somehow even hornier?

Slowthai / Doorman

Solange / Stay Flo - I think I can name more Solange songs than Beyonce songs??

Soul Glo / 31 - Brings the total number of black dudes in hardcore to like 6

Storm{O} / Ho Chi Minh - Huge soft spot for Italian hardcore

Sturgill Simpson / Sing Along - this man is literally the only country musician actually innovating the genre besides maybe Hank Williams III who made an album that’s just blast beats and cattle auctioneers

Substance / Countdown

Sudan Archives / Confessions

Swan Meat / Suckling - I FUCKING LOVE THIS SHIT

Tami T / Princess - I literally cannot tell if this is good but I’m fucking obsessed with it (also SWEDISH)

ТЭЦ / Видел я немало лошадей

Thom Yorke / Dawn Chorus

Tre Oh Fie / Give it 2 Em

Triad God / Gway Lo

Tyler the Creator / EARFQUAKE

Vampire Weekend / This Life

Vi som älskade varandra så mycket / Men livet går vidare - SCREAMO FROM THE MOTHERLAND

Weezer / The End of the Game - I’m sorry

Weyes Blood / Andromeda

Wizard Apprentice / You Won

yeule / Pretty Bones

Young Thug & Lil Baby / Bad Bad Bad

Yung Cortex / I’ve Been Waiting - I have no idea what the fuck this is but its terrible and I fucking love it

Yung Lean / Blue Plastic

Yu Su / Little Birds, Moonbath

[rpchive]

Sixty Sixth Encounter-- Something About You

As the IT finally comes to a stop, Tori meets up with Nydins; Rio; and Silky in the console room. alienrabitt: Jeez, you were gone so long it's almost a surprise to see you here. Silky: Huh? Yeah, it's a little weird for me too. I'm still trying to figure out exactly what happened with you; XL tried to explain with the letter thing, but I still kinda feel like I only have half the picture. Still, you don't seem all that different. Also, sorry if I scared you guys with the whole helmet thing back there; didn't really have time to explain... Collin steps in shortly after Tori. "It's alright, you did what you had to given the situation. We're just glad it wasn't actually activated or anything." Rio: Oh, even if I'd turned it on, all it would've done was light up and try to lock with the suit; all the main functions were broken or disabled, so she was safe the whole time! But I guess Asra kinda knew too... Silky: You'd think someone raised by the Earth's representative would've been a little kinder to us... Collin: Wait, Asra was descended from Earth's representative? Silky: No, adopted by her. That woman wouldn't even dream to imagine hurting anybody else, but Asra still wound up being aggressive. I guess being told to forgive us all her life by one of the people who asked her parents to die for us didn't fly too well. Collin: God, that's... a lot to take in. Silky: Her birth parents, on the other hand, were some of the most powerful mages on Earth before its destruction. That level of magical prowess is rarely seen in the sectors; think I've only heard of one case of a mage that powerful coming out of a planet in the sectors, and they were a glitch. Collin: A magical robot? That seems like an odd combo. Silky: Glitches have the highest magical capabilities out of all of us; it's just that their systems can't always handle the instability that comes with? the interference, which usually causes short circuits and shutdowns. It's fascinating, but kind of scary, and a little sad sometimes... Collin: I see... So is Rio magical on top of also being some kind of super hacking machine? Silky: In theory; but our abilities are so weak that we can't freely cast under normal circumstances. Without a wand or staff, those abilities are entirely dormant. Collin: I guess that makes sense. Man, learn something new every day...

this is not an invitation to try and make her a mage, unfortunately

Nydins: Well, should we see where we've landed? Hopefully it's a little more peaceful... Collin: Sounds good to me. Where /did/ we head off to anyways? Nydins: I didn't really send it off anywhere in particular; I just wanted to get away from that Nox character, so I sent us off anywhere. Collin: Hoo boy, this should be interesting, then. Bracing himself for anything, Tori cautiously opens the door to the IT. Outside, it seems to be a calm, comfortable day, and the IT has landed atop a grassy hill dotted with flowers and trees all the way down. In the distance, there's a few more hills surrounding a rather large mountain with little more than a handful of buildings at the base of it. There seems to be a stone path leading up to this hillside in particular. From behind the IT, some quiet singing can be heard as someone distantly plucks away at some kind of instrument. Collin: This seems... shockingly serene. Nydins: Well, hopefully it's not too good to be true... Collin: We'll find out shortly, eh? Collin steps outside and takes a look around. At a nearby tree at the top of the hill, three figures can be seen in the distance. Standing patiently, the first is in a suit of lavender armor with intricate engravings covering the exterior. They seem to be watching you, but have not moved upon noticing you step out. The second, seated beneath the tree, is dressed in a set of off-white clothing with bright red trim. Holding a long, wooden staff, they sway it rather carelessly to the tune of the music. The third, bouncing around excitedly with an instrument you do not recognize, is covered in an array of pastels and bows, and seems to be enjoying themself.

ladies

Collin: We're being watched, but I think we're good so far? Silky: Unsurprisingly; seeing a big, red vending machine pop out of nowhere is a little confusing. Collin: Think we should go say hi? alienrabitt: Better than just staring at each other, I guess... Collin shrugs slightly and then starts towards the trio. The armored figure turns to face you, keeping one hand rested on the hilt of their sheathed sword. "You there! What is that thing? And who are you? What business do you have here?" Collin: Uh... A spaceship, Collin, and sightseeing, I guess? ???: Spaceship...? You're alien? Collin: I mean, some of us are. I'm human, but... maybe that doesn't mean anything here and I'm an alien after all? ???: Human?! You have the audacity to come here?! I ought to--!! She is cut off by the staff of the person in red and white being lowered between you two. ????: Armaya; leave him be. He isn't here for trouble; and he's far too young to know of the war. Armaya: Saren; that doesn't excuse that he's--!! Saren: --With other kleivenn; and his own saa at that. Let them pass. Armaya: His own--?! They do not have ownership over us!! We're separate beings!! We're alive!! Saren: And he's aware of that. And he respects that. He is kind; allow his passage and stand down. Reluctantly, Armaya removes her grip from her sword, but does not take her eyes off you. Collin: Okay, kleivenn, gotcha. Sorry, I probably would've approached the whole "human" thing a little more carefully had I realized... Saren: It's alright. You mean us no harm; you're simply passing through. Tori catches up with Karumet and Firefly following behind him. Watching silently, Saren removes her staff from Armaya's path and calmly returns it to her own side. Saren: Two saas...and something else. She glances over at the IT again as Demo slips out. Fawkes seems to be following her out to keep an eye on her. Collin turns to follow Saren's gaze for a moment before turning back. Collin: Yeah, I suppose that's one thing to call her... Saren: Seems you came from a lack of understanding; both of yourselves and of your situation. We can hopefully shed some light on those subjects.

to be fair, she did say “hopefully”

Collin: Uh, you could say that. How exactly do you know all this stuff anyway? Telepathy or something? Saren: Close enough; yes. I don't want to pry more than I have to, so I only sought why you were here. Collin: Thanks, I guess? So where is "here", exactly? Armaya: The former home of one of our gods. We try to preserve it the best we can, even if it means being targeted... Fawkes: Targeted? By who? Armaya: Humans; or the saas left unsaved from the war experiments. Collin: Wait, humans are still after you after all this time? Armaya: The few left out in the world that still know of us, yes. Humanity didn't abolish the experiments after they won the war; they merely kept them going behind closed doors. Collin: Jesus, and here I thought the worst of it was over... Saren: It never really ended, in that regard. But that doesn't matter. For the time being, we're safe, and so are you. Fawkes: You mentioned us not knowing much about kleivenn a moment ago, and that you could give us some more understanding. Are you a scholar, perhaps? Saren: Yes and no. I was talking more about your...problems. More specifically, you don't really seem to understand what it means to be a saa or how to even handle yourself, do you? alienrabitt: ...I know what I'm doing; I just...don't have a grip on it yet. Saren: Then that's what we can help. Collin: You can? Saren: It's a problem with limitation; not you; and not your environment. Though the proper environment would certainly help more than hinder... But yes; we can help. Collin glances over to Tori. "What do you think? They seem like they know what they're talking about, at least." alienrabitt: I...guess it's worth trying? Worst case it doesn't work, right? Saren: Excellent. Then if you would follow me to the mountain-- She is interrupted by the third, pastel stranger, who sings out excitedly as she plucks upon a long, stringed instrument of some sort that ends in a big, multi-faceted, orange glass ball that seems to glow with each pluck of the strings. ???: Wiiiiiith-in the mountain stands a beast so great and bold Within the mountain lies a beast not bound by heart or soul It never wakes; it never sleeps And every night; it sits and weeps For all the children and the creeps that from it they stole!! Armaya: Would you--!? Exhaling sharply, she tries to calm down. "Would you kindly retire for the evening?" ???: Evening? It's barely past noon! Armaya: Yes, so retire for the evening! ???: And deny all these people my beautiful face and voice?! I shudder at the thought!! Fawkes: That seems a bit harsh, don't you think? She's just singing a song, after all. Armaya: She's being--...she needs to go home is what she ought to be doing; My Lady; these people? are-- ???: Too slow! Saren's gonna be at the mountain by the time you're done complaining! Quit burning their daylight and show 'em the way! Armaya: But-- ???: No buts, missy! You promised me you'd do as I asked without question, so help these fellows and friends out, will you? Armaya: ...At once... ???: Ohh, don't be so down about it!! I'll cook for ya tonight! Anything you want! Armaya: Swizz; the only thing I want is for you to go home... ???: Well, I'm already here, so get walkin'! Walk and talk, even! Sighing again, Armaya leads the way to the mountain. Fawkes: Swizz, was it? That song of yours, is it based on something real? Swizz: A long time ago, yeah; but not anymore. All that's left is the magic; and it's all diluted now. Solidified, useless stuff! Unless you're a saa or somethin', but most things passing through can't sponge magic. Collin: Solidified magic? How does that happen? Swizz: You'll see! Reaching the mountain, Saren raises an eyebrow? at Swizz briefly before stepping into a cave at the base. "There you are. I was starting to think you'd left." Collin: Nah, we just got a little hung up. Saren: How fortunate! I'm looking forward to helping you. It seems like you might need it. I'm just surprised you never learned this from other kleivenn... Never really had the time, unfortunately... Saren: ...Seems you're full of surprises. Collin: That's usually the case with our little group, honestly. Saren: Birds of a feather, I suppose. Most groups /do/ usually have at least one common interest or theme. The further into the cave the group progresses, the more noticeable the small, glowing crystals along the edges become, until the walls and ceiling are absolutely lined with them. At last the tunnel opens up into a large area that has stripes and spires of massive, glowing crystals, all generally greens and blues with stripes and spots of orange here and there. In the center of the room appears to be a seemingly bottomless pool of water roughly 10 feet in diameter. Collin: Oh wow...

I’ve been thinking about this place for a while tbh. in my original “draft” this was gonna be a giant godshard; but that’s a different storyline altogether tbh

Saren: These are the remnants of Orion's power; they do not serve as godshards and provide no side effects. They merely contain amounts of magic no being has been able to drain entirely; so I assure you, you won't take in more than we have no matter what you do. Feel free to take your time. Collin: Sky's the limit, huh? In that case, where do you wanna start Tori? alienrabitt: Do you even know if or how much power is being taken? Armaya: Of course; but the crystals dim with a lack of power, so the cave going dark would probably be a good sign of that... Saren: So you're going to try to stop taking in excess? alienrabitt: I can do it on my own, it's just in combat that things get iffy... Saren: Then you'd better pick a partner. Collin: I... guess I could try, if you want? Taking in a deep breath, Tori summons up his old sword. "When you're ready..." Collin: Uh, just one second... He walks over and places his left hand on one of the larger crystals. "How hard do you want me to go with this?" alienrabitt: I...can probably handle anything you wanna throw at me, hopefully. Collin takes in a deep breath and rolls his shoulders.   "Looks like this'll be a learning exercise for both of us, then..." Small runes emanate from underneath his hand and drift over the crystal's surface before quickly fading away, and the markings rapidly spread up his arm and across his body. After several more seconds, his skin slowly begins to change in color, and after several more he shifts into his state from Dezdemona's castle. He takes his hand off the crystal and shakes it as though he had just touched a stovetop and turns back to face Tori. "Hoo, alright, Saren wasn't kidding about how much power is in these things! Okay, you ready babe?" Watching the crystal dim, Tori thinks on it for a moment before giving a reluctant nod. "As I'll ever be, I guess." Collin: Alright, let's start simple then! Collin clasps his hands behind his back, and around him eight golden circles appear in the air parallel to the ground. From the circles rise eight glowing swords of light, and the circles vanish as the swords complete their exit. In a blink, Collin appears only a few feet away from Tori, and the swords slash downward diagonally at him one after the other in a series of identical strikes. Quickly diving into a dodge, Tori attempts to counter as Armaya glances around briefly only to nod approvingly after a few moments. Two swords dive in and block Tori's counter with a cross-shaped formation while the other six swords rocket upwards toward the ceiling and then shoot down on him like arrows, leaving streaks of light in their wake and shattering upon whatever they hit. Creating a barrier to defend himself, Tori gets ready to move as Armaya rolls her eyes beneath her closed helmet and reaches through, pulling Tori out immediately after the swords shatter. "Try again." Collin: Huh? Do what again? Armaya: He pulled; I saw one of the crystals dim as soon as he made the barrier. You've got your own magic, use it... alienrabitt: But I...I can't like this. I'm trying, but- Armaya: Then you aren't meant for combat. Try something else. alienrabitt: What?! No, I've been doing this kind of thing for ages; I'm not helpless; I- Armaya: Show me what you are. alienrabitt: ...What? Armaya: Your real body; show it to me. If you're anything like me, you can keep trying. If you're not; this ends now. Collin: Uhh, I'm not sure what to tell you here, Tori. Obviously it's your choice, but these guys seem to know what they're talking about... alienrabitt: ...Fine. Shifting to his lighted silhouette; there is a brief flash of light from the center of it before he is forced into the shape of what appears to be a small, white bunny with little, golden wings for ears. Embarrassed beyond belief, Tori immediately goes back to his humanoid form.

I shamelessly stole them because they’re Good lol

tbh I like a lot of Gaia stuff and the “lore” and such but god the economy is in shambles and it’s “cringy” now but ehhhhh

Karumet: What in the world...? Firefly: B-but he's a dragon!! We've seen it...! Armaya: You're...you have...how...how?! Collin: I uh... don't know what just happened. Did his wish change or something? Saren: He's a Hermes Kleivenn; a breed named by humans; there were only 7 in existence, and every single one of them died under Phoenix's banner during the war. Not fighters; not prophets; their abilities are entirely myth at this point... Collin: .... I thought you said you guys were going to help us understand this stuff, but now we've just got more questions. Saren: Has he died? I mean, his crushing point; did he reach it? Collin: Unfortunately, yes. Saren: And who did he see; one of the Nine? Collin timidly holds up two fingers. "Uh... two, actually."

well Phoenix is one of the Mothers, not the Others

Saren: ...Two? ...Then he must have appealed; I believe he has either allied with Phoenix or taken in a godshard like our friend Swizzy. Collin: Swizzy has a godshard? Saren: Has or is; however you'd like to put it. But yes, she does. Collin: Ooookay then! So how do we know which option Tori took? Do you remember? I just know who I talked to; I don't know what happened after I literally begged for my life... Saren: Please tell me you didn't actually beg /Phoenix/...Good grief; okay. I assume you've been to Kujaar? Collin: Yeah, twice now actually. Why? Saren: Then you should know anyone that takes in a godshard has a reaction of some sort. Maybe not drastic; possibly only a memory of some sort. Have you? alienrabitt: No, I haven't. I've just been trying to survive; I don't know what all of this is... Saren: ...You'll have to forgive me; I was a bit excited at the prospect of meeting Phoenix...if you're simply a Hermes, it's...well, exciting; but significantly less...you know. alienrabitt: Yeah, I get it...so what's the real deal? If I'm just a Hermes, what does that mean? Saren: I already told you; we have no idea. The 7 Hermes died with Phoenix; any record of their abilities was lost in the war...you could be capable of literally anything, and we wouldn't know until you did it yourself. Collin: In that case, it might be more productive if Tori tried to use his powers toward me? Saren: Yes, absolutely! This should be a learning experience for all of us! Just don't push yourselves too hard. Reluctantly, Tori goes back to his true form, taking a moment to consider his options before attempting to use his power. Despite his environment, however, nothing actually seems to happen, and he looks to Saren curiously, who merely shrugs back. Brushing tiny paws through his feathered ears, Tori tries again to no avail. Armaya glances at the crystals briefly before giving an encouraging nod. One last time, Tori tries again; and, yet again, nothing seems to physically happen. Giving up, he goes back to his humanoid from, giving an exaggerated shrug. Collin: Well, it sorta looked like you were onto something for a moment there... alienrabitt: I just don't understand what to do. I'm trying everything I can think of, but I just-- Swizzy: Don't worry about it! Not to heart or mind, remember? In a place like this, acting on instinct; planning stuff out; that doesn't work right! Don't even think about it, just act! alienrabitt: But what am I even supposed to do? Swizzy: ...Anything! Anything you can think of; just don't think to do it! Got it? alienrabitt: No; I-- Swizzy: Don't argue, just try it! Anything at all! Just don't think about it! Demo: He can't pull it off. He overthinks everything and overreacts even harder. He won't even be able to pull himself together long enough to figure it out. alienrabitt: What the hell do you know about me?! Nobody even knows what I am anymore! Demo: I don't need to know what you are to know /who/ you are, airhead. You might have a new engine; but you're still the same clunker I met years ago. Shut up. You're wrong. Demo: Then prove it. alienrabitt: I can't. I can't do-- Demo: Yes you can; you always can; you're like a really shitty wonderball that never goes empty despite how many times it's been broken open; and covered in lint; and left in the sun; you're just the gift that keeps on giving; so give us what you've got!

you’re like, the least encouraging piece of garbage

alienrabitt: Don't push me on this! I know what I'm capable of, and I can't-- Demo: Then quit. Accept the fact that you have no idea who or what you are; you can't help anybody; and nobody can help you; and that everything you've ever worked for is gonna go up in flames because you can't even help yourself, let alone your friends. Tensing up, Tori balls his hands into fists as he starts tearing up. "What the hell do you think you know about me?!" The entire cavern flickers briefly. "You don't know anything about what I've been through; or what I am; or what I've done; or what I can do!" It flickers again. "...So just shut up; and leave! Me! Alone!!" Everybody, save for Tori, is abruptly back in front of the IT. Collin: ... Well, that did something. Saren: That's...that's it? No, they...they created diversions; it took the humans years to get past their first Hermes; surely they don't just...reroute... Armaya: Maybe not, but that one's a lost cause. He can't keep a grip on his power, let alone his temper. He'll never be able to figure out what to do with himself fast enough for it to matter. Collin: The hell is that supposed to mean? So Tori doesn't have a full grasp of what he can do after, what, two minutes of finding out what he actually is? So much for your "helping us find the light", huh?

it took me like 3 days to figure out where he got that phrase since nobody said that, lol

but yeah no they did say hopefully they could shed some light

Saren: Well, we certainly found something... Swizzy: Mmm, closer to lost; he's all by himself and we're way out here! Well, sort of. Collin: Oh, I can fix that one easy if you want. Swizzy: Worth a try! Collin holds up one finger while making a "bwoop" noise with his mouth, repeating the sound with each motion as he points randomly at every person around him before finishing with himself. He spins his finger in a small circle and then claps his hands together, and the group finds themselves back in the cave just as quickly as they left. "And we're back!" Swizzy: Well that's...different. Ignoring how quickly everyone returned, Tori is seated cross-legged at the edge of the water in the center of the cave, quietly staring into the depths. Collin casually strides over next to Tori and sits in a cross-legged position in mid-air before slowly descending to the ground next to him. "It is rather pretty, huh?" alienrabitt: ...You--; well, I guess I should've expected that much from you...whatever.... Collin: Huh? What's that supposed to mean? alienrabitt: Whatever you are now; it's clear you can do just about anything; so surprises aren't as surprising in the right circumstances. But you're not showing off, so whatever. This isn't about that anyway. Collin: Nope, not really. I'm guessing you're upset because you don't know what your powers are again? alienrabitt: No; I've always known. I've always known it was going to be like this; I just never expected you to be so...scared...after everything that we did; you're still just running from it...we all tried so hard; I just don't understand. It's like trying to hold water...everything's just...going away. But why? Why is it so easy? They don't deserve it... Collin: ... Huh? alienrabitt: I know; I'm interrupting you; I always do; but what else do we have left? I'm sorry. This is all we do, isn't it? Running; hiding; but we're just as strong as they are; we can do everything they can; but...only in here. Why is it like that? Why are we like that? Why am I...? ...I'm sorry. I'm so sorry... Collin carefully places a hand on Tori's shoulder. "Tori, are you okay? I feel like I'm listening in on a phone call or something here..." alienrabitt: ...Huh?

if we’re being honest I was really inexplicably distracted while I was writing this and like lowkey wound up rambling

but this entire chunk is a conversation between a bunch of other people; none of it was actually directed at Collin

Blinking a bit, Tori finally looks over to you. "Oh, you're back..." Collin: Well yeah. You literally acknowledged my presence like thirty seconds ago and then started rambling to yourself. alienrabitt: I...did? I know I locked you guys out, but I shouldn't have...huh? Collin: Shouldn't have what? alienrabitt: Why was I talking to myself? I'm confused... Collin: Likewise. Collin rotates to face back to the others without making any physical movements to do so. "Hey, any of you guys got a clue what just happened?" Swizzy: I think he wasn't talking to himself; we were just stepping in on a conversation we couldn't see since you walked out before he let us out. He doesn't remember it because it wasn't between him and them; it was the Seven Hermes of Phoenix's Court. Collin: .... Again, huh? Swizzy: A Hermes is capable of creating diversions by any means as their primary form of self defense. Their preferred method, as the name suggests, is transporting their targets, physically; mentally; or otherwise. He stuck us in an illusory bubble; you just kinda poked a hole in it.

I mean I basically just told you what Tori does, but I guess this is still vague?

Collin: ... Ooooh. Huh, neat trick there cute stuff! He elbows Tori lightly in his side. Swizzy: But in this kind of environment, I'm guessing he involuntarily wound up using his wish-given ability in the same go as a stress response. As a result, the illusions failed to overlap, and you only dispelled the one we were in, so it just looked like a...very one-sided conversation. Collin: Well if that's the case, why doesn't Tori seem to remember what he was just talking about with... I guess the ghosts of the Hermes? Swizzy: Because he wasn't talking with them; he was talking /as/ them. When you look into the past, you hear voices without voices. Anyone who had been here would've seen anyone but him, and they probably could've told you it didn't sound like him either. Collin: This just gets weirder and weirder the more questions I ask. Swizzy: Hm, well; think of it this way: a Hermes serves as both a door and a key depending on what they need. He can go anywhere he needs, but only as long as he needs to, and even then, he can only do it for however long he's personally capable. We don't know those extents 'cause the seven Hermes died with Phoenix; but I'm sure it's as long as they have magic. His other powers, on the other hand, are something I don't really know about! I'd say they're...related to doing whatever​ it takes to keep his wish right; whatever that is. Collin: Well that's... fairly vague, but it's not like we knew a lot about his powers before this happened anyways. Swizzy: It's just something you'll have to try out, I guess. But you saw it before now, right? Or something like it...? Collin: Actually yeah, but that got... really weird. It happened right before Tori hit his crushing point. Saren: ...Before? Collin: Yeah, he created this sort of... I don't know, a pocket dimension I guess? After that broke down, Tori shattered, we helped get him back on his feet, and now we're here.

actually the fact that it was contained to being a pocket dimension was Lou’s doing, but yeah, he did wind up doing that before since it still fit into the guidelines of “stay with x as long as possible”

Saren: How did he manage that before...? Swizzy: Now that's a good one...who knows! Maybe he was already at the point of a new wish, but unstable? Regardless, you know what he's capable of... Collin: Wait, you do? Swizzy: No, but you do! Collin: Uh... if you guys, actual Kleivenn with a solid knowledge of Kleivenn history, don't know, then how would I? I get that the whole glowing skin and runic markings make me look all-powerful, but the special effects don't come with omniscience unfortunately. Swizzy: Well, maybe not everything, but what I'm saying is, you know about the pockets and stuff he can make 'cause you saw one, right? Collin: Riiight... Swizzy: Well, that aside, I'd say it's...a little more than lost focus. He can take in just about any kind of magic; as long as he uses it towards something he shouldn't overload. Just understand that this magic is powerful, and that not all doors are two-way. It was a method of self-defense given to what were essentially knights for a god; not a toy. But with a ship like yours, I doubt you'd use it for that kind of thing anyway, so there's nothing to worry about! Collin: Alright, I think I'm following you, at least a little bit. So Tori isn't just limited to creating illusions of other places, but can actually go to the real versions of them? Swizzy: Yes and no; remember that "door and key" thing? He sort of exists between two places at once for as long as he needs to; but there's illusions too. Collin: That's... a little harder to wrap my head around admittedly, but alright.

we’ll get to see it “soon;” no spoilers exactly when, but imo it’s Really Obvious by now what Tori’s powers are gonna be for

Swizzy: So I guess there's...not much to explain? He makes doors and bubbles as a Hermes; anything else is 'cause of you, I guess. You're his human, right? Well...kinda human? Collin: Human Plus, let's go with that. Swizzy: Fair enough? But you understand. Sorry if that got more confusing; this kind of thing is just...something to find out over time. Maybe you'd understand seeing it in motion; but it's not really something he can call upon willy-nilly. Collin: Eh, we live pretty eventful lives. I'm sure it'll come up eventually. Swizzy: I'm sure! alienrabitt: Uhh, but...what about you? You took in a whole bunch of magic; you gonna be okay walking out like that? Collin: Oh, right. Honestly I didn't think we'd stop fighting so quickly, so I didn't think I'd have as much power left. I suppose I could just dump it back out into Firefly's mana tanks. I'm not sure these crystals take power back in anyways. Saren: They can't that I'm aware. Collin: It is sorta fun being like this though, I have to admit. Even if it does make things look a bit... different. alienrabitt: They do? Collin: No no, it's not the pantheon or anything. It's more like... if you were walking around a scrapyard for a while, and then suddenly you're given a welding torch and a toolbag, and you can see all sorts of possibilities with what you can do. It's not that your surroundings changed, but more like that you now have the tools and the vision to do something with them. Saren: How curious. Swizzy: Neat! Collin: It's still something I have to get used to. Honestly it's kinda scary how much power I can feel like this. It's like suddenly you've grown to be fifty feet tall while browsing around a china shop. Saren: Sounds overwhelming, honestly. I'm not sure how you can be so comfortable about it... Collin: Well usually I don't have this much magic. Besides, I'd have to want things to happen in order to cause them, and I don't particularly want to do anything bad. I don't know, I guess it's just the possibility that's sort of intimidating. Saren: That's...fair. But I still stand by my earlier assumption that having you here is harmless enough. I'm sure even you couldn't take in all the power in these walls at once... Collin looks around the cave for several seconds before turning back to Saren. "You're not wrong, but I could probably find a way around that. N-not that I want to!" Armaya slowly lifts her visor exclusively to allow the glare she's giving him to be visible; revealing that one of her eyes is nearly scarred shut in the process. "Of course not..." Collin: I uh... I should probably leave, huh? Swizzy: You can stay as long as you'd like; but Armaya won't be leaving you alone... Collin: Right, well, let me just... uh... He looks around frantically for a moment and then puts a hand down onto the cave floor. He moves to stand, and as he does so a new crystal rises up from the ground underneath his hand, almost as if he were using it as a grip to push himself up. As the crystal grows, Collin's power visibly fades until almost nothing is left aside from the mark on his hand. He takes his hand off its surface, and the crystal slowly shifts between a variety of soft pastel colors, quite unlike the other crystals of the case. "Er, sorry, I guess I can't quite mimic the way it was before. You can probably dig that up and move it out of here so it doesn't clash with everything else. Sorry..."

Armaya: H-huh?! You didn't have to--...!! Ugh...! Okay... Rolling her eyes, Armaya pulls her visor back down. "Swizz; can we please leave now? They got what they came for...I guess." Swizzy: Hmmm? Oh, you can leave whenever you want too, y'know... Armaya: And leave you alone with that--?! N-no! Please just come home... Swizzy: Fine, fine; but you'll be cooking all night for rushing me! With that, the pair leaves the group with Saren. Collin: I'm sorry about this. It's a little hard to focus when I'm like...that. I just started thinking out loud and then... Saren: No, no, it's fine. I guess it was just surprising. You really didn't have to put it back; it's very rare for anyone like us to pass through here, so the magic here barely gets any use. Collin: I was just trying to "disarm" myself. I thought maybe it'd take off some of the pressure on Armaya. Didn't really work, huh? Saren: More than anything, she was confused. She isn't angry with you, she just...doesn't really get your angle. After a war like ours, you spend a long time wondering if peaceful humans truly exist... Collin: I... try my best? Saren: Whatever the case, we appreciate the effort. Collin: That's good to hear. We should probably get going though, I think I might've overstayed our welcome a bit. Saren: Suit yourself. Feel free to come back whenever you'd like; odd as you are, we seem to enjoy your company for the most part. Collin: Heh, I guess two out of three isn't that bad. Shall we? alienrabitt: Yeah, I guess we should. With that, the group heads out of the cave and back toward the IT.

yay; next time we get back to the plot!!

[coolcomputerobservation-blog]

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